The CWCki needs help! Please consider clicking the tugboat to make a donation
Sonichu and Rosechu's children
Cerah Rosey (also spelled "Cera"), Christine Rosey and Robbie Sonee are the children of Sonichu and Rosechu. Cerah is the oldest (born 29 June 2006, followed by Christine (b. 7 October 2006), and finally Robbie (b. 26 February 2007).
It is probable that Cerah is named after Chris's childhood best friend and Robbie is named after either Chris's father or his childhood hero. Christine's name may come from the feminine variant of Christian's name (due to his narcissism) or his obsession with the name "Crystal". It should be noted that while Chris was uploading images to use as thumbnails for his character bio pages, he attempted to display a non-existent image file entitled "CrystalRosey.jpg" where a drawing of Christine should have gone.
They can be identified by their whiny, high-pitched voices and irritating speech impediments. To date, neither Sonichu nor Rosechu have been seen spending time with a child of the opposite sex to themselves. Rosechu spends large amounts of time with Cera and Christine in the kitchen, while Sonichu and Robbie do manly activities such as gazing into each others' eyes and talking about their Wii.
The children are widely detested, even more so than the other characters.
The kids' first prominent appearance is in the sign Chris drew to show his support for McIntire Park. They've also been seen in two pages of Sonichu #9, as well as getting a quick mention on page 41 of the same issue. They spend the rest of their time being watched over by their Spanish lesbian nanny, Heather Iglesias, while their neglectful parents traipse around town murdering people at the behest of their father.
The hellish abominations spawned from Rosechu's loins have also appeared in "A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas Story", and in Sonichu #11. Here, Christine alludes to having lost her virginity at age 1, and Robbie replaces his R's with W's while speaking in an effort to be as saccharine and grating as possible, but his actual dialogue is far too complex for a toddler to come out with - perhaps alluding to something else. Cera (formerly Cerah) assists Rosechu in the kitchen and breaks the fourth wall to say "I wuv you!" to Chris.
Robbie makes a brief appearance in Sonichu #10, describing an incident which involved him pissing on a lizard. Needless to say, cruelty to animals is one of the early signs of a potential psychopath.
The children also appear in Chris's disingenuous plea for helping Haiti.
Christine - the child named after Chris - is a "Shining" (or "Shiney" [sic]) Rosey according to Chris. Unsurprisingly, Chris has, yet again, ripped off an element of Pokémon canon (in the games, a Pokémon that has a different coloration from what is usual for its species is considered to be "shiny").
On 12 November 2011, it was revealed that not only have all the children evolved into adults, but that they have also formed a pop band: Robee Sonee and the Tomgirls. Moreover, like Chris, they have mutated into more disturbing forms: Robbie has changed his name to "Robee" and has become a tomgirl (or the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon equivalent: Sonirose?) while Cera has become a tomboy. Note that this change comes after Chris wiped out all homosexuality in Sonichu #10.
Chris expanded on this in 2014: Robbie/Robee is now a "Lesbian Tomgirl Tranny Cross-Dresser (still very much into women)", Christine (now inexplicably named "Crystaline") is bisexual, and Cera is a lesbian. Quite the progressive family for a town that carried out an ethnic cleansing. As ridiculous as this is, it suggests Chris is still making deific adjustments to CWCville, which fuels hope for further Sonichu installments.
LEGO Christine, proud bisexual.
The children of Sonichu and Rosechu are also a popular subject for fanart. In August 2009, a large volume of art depicting Sonichu and Rosechu's frolicking children was emailed to Chris. He did not appreciate it, for some odd reason. Ironically, in a later comic, he all but confirmed this art as canon with the implication that Christine is not a virgin.
- Sonichu#Married Life and Children
- Katie Bay E-mails 4
- Katie Bay E-mails 6
- August 2014 Facebook Posts#Sonichu's kryptonite
- Sonee & Rosey
- CWC Update 12 August 2009, in which Chris addresses the former.
- A Sonichu Day
- "A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas Story"
- Robee Sonee and the Tomgirls
- Wikipedia article on The Lurking Fear