Difference between revisions of "Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)"

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[[Image:DVDReleaseCut.jpg|thumb|Chris-chan: Because making a home made DVD about yourself justifies your existence.]]
{{DeadLinks}}
{{Articleofthenow}}
{{Honest}}
{{Honest}}


'''''Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)''''' is [[Chris's]] homemade DVD which he has sent to a select few where he goes on about his life. It was obtained by [[LordSillynipples]] by posing as Chris's childhood friend and first crush, Tiffany Robinson. Despite its title, very little of the material on the DVD was ever featured on TV.
[[Image:DVDReleaseCut.jpg|thumb|Chris-chan: Because making a homemade DVD about yourself justifies your existence.]]


Chris also has plans to market it commercially onto Blu-ray.<ref>[[3 December 2009]]</ref> He possibly thinks that lack of content and video quality that was abysmal to begin with will mysteriously look better when burned on [[Sonichu 10|hi-def]] discs.
'''''Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)''''' is [[Chris's]] homemade DVD, featuring various video clips Chris had made before his Internet fame, and also his actual, if meager, TV appearances. Despite its title, very little of the material on the DVD was ever featured on TV.
 
Chris originally sent copies of the DVD only to a select few people, but nevertheless thought him making the DVD was an [[Chris and his Ego|important enough achievement]] to mention repeatedly in the [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'' comic]] and elsewhere. He also believed that people would actually be interested of buying a copy along with other merchandise, and even planned a [[Sony|Blu-ray]] release.<ref>[[3 December 2009]]</ref> Suffice to say, the disc was actually burned with a Magnavox DVD recorder out of material that appears to have been transferred off of VHS tapes, and doesn't actually approach commercial quality, even if it actually had any interesting content that people would actually pay for. Chris possibly thinks that lack of content and video quality that was abysmal to begin with will mysteriously look better when burned on [[Sonichu 10|hi-def]] discs.
 
Naturally, since this relic was so profoundly ''important'' in Chris's mind, it piqued the curiosity of the trolls, and a copy was eventually obtained by [[LordSillynipples]] by posing as Chris's childhood friend and first crush, [[Tiffany Robinson]].


==Tracklisting==
==Tracklisting==
===C.W.C. On TV Trailer===
 
===''C.W.C. On TV'' Trailer===
To reduce marketing costs, Chris put the trailer for the DVD directly into the DVD. The trailer provides a summary of the rest of the features, in case you don't want to melt your brain by actually watching the whole DVD.
To reduce marketing costs, Chris put the trailer for the DVD directly into the DVD. The trailer provides a summary of the rest of the features, in case you don't want to melt your brain by actually watching the whole DVD.
===[[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|C.W.C. Super Sonic Winner!!!]]===
===[[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|C.W.C. Super Sonic Winner!!!]]===
From 26 February [[1990s#1994|1994]], shortly after Christian's 12th birthday. Local news coverage of him winning a [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] contest and earning a $1000 shopping spree for video games. To date the pinnacle of Christian's entire existence, this event fueled the delusional manchild he is today.
From 26 February [[1990s#1994|1994]], shortly after Christian's 12th birthday. Local news coverage of him winning a ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog]]'' contest and earning a $1,000 shopping spree for video games. To date the pinnacle of Christian's entire existence, this event fueled the delusional manchild he is today.
 
===[[Song of Christian]]===
===[[Song of Christian]]===
Filmed on 15 May [[1990s#1998|1998]], when Christian was 16. Presented as an episode of ''The Christian Chandler Show'', Christian gives a dramatic reading of a poem he wrote about himself. He then spends twenty minutes explaining the meaning of each line, about fifteen minutes of which is dedicated to him leafing through his [[hand-drawn Nintendo Power magazine]].
Filmed on 15 May [[1990s#1998|1998]], when Christian was sixteen. Presented as an episode of ''The Christian Chandler Show'', Christian gives a dramatic reading of a poem he wrote about himself. He then spends twenty minutes explaining the meaning of each line, about fifteen minutes of which is dedicated to him leafing through his [[hand-drawn Nintendo Power magazine|hand-drawn ''Nintendo Power'' magazine]].
===[[Mario Kart 64 Lego Raceway#Prototype|Mario Kart 64 Lego Raceway Prototype]] Animation===
 
===[[Mario Kart 64 Lego Raceway]] Animation by C.W.C. on Game Boy Camera===
===[[Mario Kart 64 Lego Raceway#Prototype|''Mario Kart 64'' LEGO Raceway Prototype]] Animation===
 
===[[Mario Kart 64 Lego Raceway|''Mario Kart 64'' LEGO Raceway]] Animation by C.W.C. on Game Boy Camera===
Filmed on 4 June [[1990s#1998|1998]].
Filmed on 4 June [[1990s#1998|1998]].


Hey, do you like Mario Kart? Do you like Lego? Do you like stop-motion animation? More importantly, do you like hearing the same fifteen-second clip of music played over and over and over while you watch grainy black-and-white 8-bit footage of Lego men getting into car wrecks? Then this is the clip for you!
Hey, do you like ''Mario Kart''? Do you like LEGO Blocks? Do you like stop-motion animation? More importantly, do you like hearing the same fifteen-second clip of music played over and over and over while you watch grainy black-and-white 8-bit footage of LEGO men getting into car wrecks? Then this is the clip for you!
 
'''SPOILER:''' LEGO Christian wins the race. [[Chris and his Ego|No surprises there.]]


SPOILER: Lego Christian wins the race.
===[[The City of Cwicville Tour!|Unfinished CWCville Tour]]===
===[[The City of Cwicville Tour!|Unfinished CWCville Tour]]===
Filmed 12 July [[2000s#2001|2001]].
Filmed 12 July [[2000s#2001|2001]].
===[[Chris Chan in the PokéNews]]===
===[[Chris Chan in the PokéNews]]===
[[Image:SlamAttack.jpg|thumb|right|OH BOY!]]
[[Image:SlamAttack.jpg|thumb|OH BOY!]]
Filmed 16 October [[1990s#1999|1999]]. The local news media do a fluff piece on the rise of Pokémon fandom, and Chris happens to be among the small children playing the game. This clip provides the DVD cover with its money line:  
Filmed 16 October [[1990s#1999|1999]]. The local news media does a fluff piece on the rise of the ''Pokémon'' fandom, and Chris happens to be among the small children playing the game. Chris being 17 at the time, years older than the playing crowd, is not discussed. This clip provides the DVD cover with its money line:  
 
{{quote|I'll send out my Dragonair, even though it has 60 Damage on it. Oh boy! It has 3 Energy on it... Slam Attack!}}
 
===Christian Chandler's [[Animal Crossing Documentary|''Animal Crossing'' Documentary]]===
Filmed 22 November [[2000s#2003|2003]]. An hour-long video of Christian playing ''Animal Crossing''. If the video is any indication, ''Animal Crossing'' is about as exciting to watch as organizing files in Microsoft Windows.


{{quote|I'll send out my Dragonair, even though it has 60 Damage on it. Oh, Boy! It has 3 Energy on it... Slam Attack!}}
===[[The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special|C.W.C.'s ''Animal Crossing''/''Mario Paint'' 24th Wedding Anniversary Special]]===
===Christian Chandler's [[Animal Crossing Documentary]]===
Filmed 22 November [[2000s#2003|2003]]. An hour-long video of Christian playing Animal Crossing. If the video is any indication, Animal Crossing is about as exciting a video game as organizing files in Microsoft Windows.
===[[The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special|C.W.C.'s Animal Crossing/Mario Paint 24th Wedding Anniversary Special]]===
Created in honor of [[Bob]] and [[Barbara]] Chandler's anniversary, on 7 June [[2004]].
Created in honor of [[Bob]] and [[Barbara]] Chandler's anniversary, on 7 June [[2004]].
===[[So Need a Cute Girl|"So Need A Cute Girl" Music video]]===
 
===[[So Need a Cute Girl|"So Need A Cute Girl" Music Video]]===
Filmed 20 [[2004#December|December 2004]]. Music video for the lead single off [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (band)|Christian's debut album]].
Filmed 20 [[2004#December|December 2004]]. Music video for the lead single off [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (band)|Christian's debut album]].
===Chris Chan's [[Harvey Birdman Commercial]]===
 
Filmed 24 February [[2005]]. Christian enters a contest where the goal is to deliver a creative advertisement for a Harvey Birdman DVD. He instead blathers on about himself, Sonichu, and Mary Lee Walsh. The time constraints laid out in the contest rules are obvious, as Christian struggles to cram his [[random-access humor]] into a 30-second soundbite so that he sounds like the Micro Machines man.
===Chris Chan's [[Harvey Birdman Commercial|''Harvey Birdman'' Commercial]]===
Filmed 24 February [[2005]]. Christian enters a contest where the goal is to deliver a creative advertisement for a ''Harvey Birdman'' DVD. He instead blathers on about himself, ''Sonichu'', and Mary Lee Walsh. The time constraints laid out in the contest rules are obvious, as Christian struggles to cram his [[random-access humor]] into a thirty-second soundbite so that he sounds like the Micro Machines man.
 
===Chris Chan's [[Pixelated PS3]]===
===Chris Chan's [[Pixelated PS3]]===
Filmed 28 November [[2006]]. Christian enters another contest requiring him to shill a product in under a minute, this time a PlayStation 3. To answer the question "What would you do for a PS3?" Chris first explains everything he would like to do but won't (e.g., save up the money and go to a store), and would but can't (forsake a cure for autism), before revealing that he has constructed a PS3 from LEGO blocks and [[Pixelblocks]].
Filmed on 28 November [[2006]]. Christian enters another contest requiring him to shill a product in under a minute, this time a PlayStation 3. To answer the question "What would you do for a PS3?", Chris first explains everything he would like to do but won't (e.g., save up the money and go to a store), and would but can't (forsake a cure for autism), before revealing that he has constructed a PS3 from LEGO blocks and [[Pixelblocks]].
===C.W.C.'s SlideShow of Photographs, Art, and Comics.===
 
Still images taken from [[1980s#1982|1982]]-[[2007]] with interspersed commentary that gives new insight into Chris's past. The accompanying audio is from Chris's "Station [[KCWC]]" mix tapes and his ''Christian and the Hedgehog Boys'' album.
===C.W.C.'s SlideShow of Photographs, Art, and Comics===
Still images taken from [[1980s#1982|1982]]-[[2007]] with interspersed commentary that gives new insight into Chris's past. The accompanying audio is from the 1998 [[KCWC broadcast]] and his ''[[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys]]'' album.
 
===[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]]===
===[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]]===
Filmed 24 February [[2007]]. In celebration of his milestone 25th birthday, Chris delivers an address summarizing the lessons he has learned in his life and how they should be applied by future generations of "ladies and gentlemen and dudes of all teenages."
Filmed 24 February [[2007]]. In celebration of his milestone 25th birthday, Chris delivers an address summarizing the lessons he has learned in his life and how they should be applied by future generations of "ladies and gentlemen and dudes of all teenages."
==Director's Cut==
As a way to save face after the DVD was leaked onto the Internet, Chris claimed<ref>Most recently in [[Captain's Log, Stardate September 29th, 2009]], though he also previously said it in earlier Captain's Logs{{cite}}</ref> that the trolls didn't have the ''director's cut'', which includes footage of Chris's Christmas from [[2004]] and takes from the [[Pixelated PS3]] commercial.


Some argue that Chris might be bluffing, but even if the content does exist, it seems likely that it was an afterthought made after Chris got trolled so that only he would own the TRUE and HONEST copy. And even if trolls were able to obtain the director's cut Chris could pull a George Lucas and say he has a special edition DVD. Like we care.
==Great Director's Cut==
As a way to save face after the DVD was leaked onto the Internet, Chris claimed<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate September 29th, 2009]]</ref> that the trolls didn't have the "Director's Cut", which includes footage of Chris's [[Christmas]] from [[2004]] and takes from the [[Pixelated PS3]] commercial.
 
Some argue that Chris might be bluffing, but even if the content does exist, it seems likely that it was an afterthought made after Chris got trolled so that only he would own the TRUE and HONEST copy. And even if trolls were able to obtain the Director's Cut, Chris could pull a George Lucas and say he has a Special Edition DVD. And if that gets stolen, he'll pull a Disney and say he has a "Diamond Edition" DVD.
 
He later told [[Regina]] that he has a "Master Copy" with over ''six hours'' of tedious crap.<ref>[[Regina e-mails]]</ref>
 
==Possible Sequel==
In an email to [[Cole]], Chris expresses his intention to create a new DVD "around (his) 50th or sooner"<ref>[[Cole Smithey E-mails]]</ref>.


==Images from the Physical DVD==
==Images from the Physical DVD==
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Image:062-CWCsDVD.jpg|Cover.
Image:062-CWCsDVD.jpg|Cover.
Image:DVDReleaseCut.jpg|The cover of the release edition.
Image:DVDReleaseCut.jpg|The cover of the release edition.
Image:063-2-CWCDVDWholeMaster.jpg|And the Director's Cut edition.
Image:063-2-CWCDVDWholeMaster.jpg|And the Director's Cut Edition.
Image:063-1-CWCsDVD Label.jpg
Image:063-1-CWCsDVD Label.jpg|Even DVD labels cannot be spared from the horror.
Image:ChrisDVDCD2.jpg|We asked for a "disc image". The torrent went up later, but this was delivered as a cop-out.
Image:ChrisDVDCD2.jpg|We asked for a "disc image". The torrent went up later, but this was delivered as a cop-out.
Image:CHRISDVD.jpg|Parental Advisory - VERY HONEST content.
Image:CHRISDVD.jpg|Parental Advisory - VERY HONEST content.
Image:ChrisDVD3.jpg|Chapter menu.
Image:ChrisDVD3.jpg|Chapter menu, complete with Magnavox DVD/VCR styling.
Image:CHRISletter.jpg|Letter to troll who received DVD.  
Image:CHRISletter.jpg|Letter to troll who received DVD.  
Image:Chrislist1.jpg|Chandler's List - it's like Schindler's List, except you'd want to be sent to a gas chamber.
Image:Chrislist1.jpg|''Chandler's List'' - It's like ''Schindler's List'', except you'd want to be sent to a gas chamber.
Image:Chrislist2.jpg|Spoiler: most of these people are people who went to school with Chris and who probably have no idea who he is.  
Image:Chrislist2.jpg|'''Spoiler:''' Most of these people went to school with Chris and probably have no idea who he is.  
Image:Chrislist3.jpg|And here's the last page.
Image:Chrislist3.jpg|And here's the last page.
Image:Chrispaper1.jpg|"Now I'm even more perverted, sexist, and homophobic."
Image:Chrispaper1.jpg|"Now I'm even more perverted, sexist, and homophobic."
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</center>
</center>


==Sauces==
==Sources==
<references/>
<references/>


==Links==
==External links==
 
* [http://thepiratebay.se/torrent/4433832/Christian_Weston_Chandler..._Yep__I_m_On_T.V.___)_DVD DVD Torrent]
* [http://www.mediafire.com/?injjxctj5wi Torrent (with working trackers)]
* [http://www.youtube.com/view_play_list?p=6581777D1899DCB6 Entire DVD on YouTube.]
* [http://www.youtube.com/view_play_list?p=6581777D1899DCB6 Entire DVD on YouTube]
* <s>[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/dvd/ Contents of DVD slideshow.]</s>
* [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/dvd/ Contents of DVD slideshow]
* <s>[http://www.megaupload.com/?d=EL8AHJ8P Slideshow download.]</s>
* [http://www.megaupload.com/?d=EL8AHJ8P Slideshow download]


{{CWC on TV}}
{{CWC on TV}}

Revision as of 20:35, 24 August 2014

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THAT IS MY LINK!!!

This article contains link(s) which have been cut down by the Internet Lumberjack or which have otherwise crashed into slumber due to stress. Please help the CWCki by replacing or restoring these links.
Chris-chan: Because making a homemade DVD about yourself justifies your existence.

Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :) is Chris's homemade DVD, featuring various video clips Chris had made before his Internet fame, and also his actual, if meager, TV appearances. Despite its title, very little of the material on the DVD was ever featured on TV.

Chris originally sent copies of the DVD only to a select few people, but nevertheless thought him making the DVD was an important enough achievement to mention repeatedly in the Sonichu comic and elsewhere. He also believed that people would actually be interested of buying a copy along with other merchandise, and even planned a Blu-ray release.[1] Suffice to say, the disc was actually burned with a Magnavox DVD recorder out of material that appears to have been transferred off of VHS tapes, and doesn't actually approach commercial quality, even if it actually had any interesting content that people would actually pay for. Chris possibly thinks that lack of content and video quality that was abysmal to begin with will mysteriously look better when burned on hi-def discs.

Naturally, since this relic was so profoundly important in Chris's mind, it piqued the curiosity of the trolls, and a copy was eventually obtained by LordSillynipples by posing as Chris's childhood friend and first crush, Tiffany Robinson.

Tracklisting

C.W.C. On TV Trailer

To reduce marketing costs, Chris put the trailer for the DVD directly into the DVD. The trailer provides a summary of the rest of the features, in case you don't want to melt your brain by actually watching the whole DVD.

C.W.C. Super Sonic Winner!!!

From 26 February 1994, shortly after Christian's 12th birthday. Local news coverage of him winning a Sonic the Hedgehog contest and earning a $1,000 shopping spree for video games. To date the pinnacle of Christian's entire existence, this event fueled the delusional manchild he is today.

Song of Christian

Filmed on 15 May 1998, when Christian was sixteen. Presented as an episode of The Christian Chandler Show, Christian gives a dramatic reading of a poem he wrote about himself. He then spends twenty minutes explaining the meaning of each line, about fifteen minutes of which is dedicated to him leafing through his hand-drawn Nintendo Power magazine.

Mario Kart 64 LEGO Raceway Prototype Animation

Mario Kart 64 LEGO Raceway Animation by C.W.C. on Game Boy Camera

Filmed on 4 June 1998.

Hey, do you like Mario Kart? Do you like LEGO Blocks? Do you like stop-motion animation? More importantly, do you like hearing the same fifteen-second clip of music played over and over and over while you watch grainy black-and-white 8-bit footage of LEGO men getting into car wrecks? Then this is the clip for you!

SPOILER: LEGO Christian wins the race. No surprises there.

Unfinished CWCville Tour

Filmed 12 July 2001.

Chris Chan in the PokéNews

OH BOY!

Filmed 16 October 1999. The local news media does a fluff piece on the rise of the Pokémon fandom, and Chris happens to be among the small children playing the game. Chris being 17 at the time, years older than the playing crowd, is not discussed. This clip provides the DVD cover with its money line:

I'll send out my Dragonair, even though it has 60 Damage on it. Oh boy! It has 3 Energy on it... Slam Attack!

Christian Chandler's Animal Crossing Documentary

Filmed 22 November 2003. An hour-long video of Christian playing Animal Crossing. If the video is any indication, Animal Crossing is about as exciting to watch as organizing files in Microsoft Windows.

C.W.C.'s Animal Crossing/Mario Paint 24th Wedding Anniversary Special

Created in honor of Bob and Barbara Chandler's anniversary, on 7 June 2004.

"So Need A Cute Girl" Music Video

Filmed 20 December 2004. Music video for the lead single off Christian's debut album.

Chris Chan's Harvey Birdman Commercial

Filmed 24 February 2005. Christian enters a contest where the goal is to deliver a creative advertisement for a Harvey Birdman DVD. He instead blathers on about himself, Sonichu, and Mary Lee Walsh. The time constraints laid out in the contest rules are obvious, as Christian struggles to cram his random-access humor into a thirty-second soundbite so that he sounds like the Micro Machines man.

Chris Chan's Pixelated PS3

Filmed on 28 November 2006. Christian enters another contest requiring him to shill a product in under a minute, this time a PlayStation 3. To answer the question "What would you do for a PS3?", Chris first explains everything he would like to do but won't (e.g., save up the money and go to a store), and would but can't (forsake a cure for autism), before revealing that he has constructed a PS3 from LEGO blocks and Pixelblocks.

C.W.C.'s SlideShow of Photographs, Art, and Comics

Still images taken from 1982-2007 with interspersed commentary that gives new insight into Chris's past. The accompanying audio is from the 1998 KCWC broadcast and his Christian and the Hedgehog Boys album.

Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE

Filmed 24 February 2007. In celebration of his milestone 25th birthday, Chris delivers an address summarizing the lessons he has learned in his life and how they should be applied by future generations of "ladies and gentlemen and dudes of all teenages."

Great Director's Cut

As a way to save face after the DVD was leaked onto the Internet, Chris claimed[2] that the trolls didn't have the "Director's Cut", which includes footage of Chris's Christmas from 2004 and takes from the Pixelated PS3 commercial.

Some argue that Chris might be bluffing, but even if the content does exist, it seems likely that it was an afterthought made after Chris got trolled so that only he would own the TRUE and HONEST copy. And even if trolls were able to obtain the Director's Cut, Chris could pull a George Lucas and say he has a Special Edition DVD. And if that gets stolen, he'll pull a Disney and say he has a "Diamond Edition" DVD.

He later told Regina that he has a "Master Copy" with over six hours of tedious crap.[3]

Possible Sequel

In an email to Cole, Chris expresses his intention to create a new DVD "around (his) 50th or sooner"[4].

Images from the Physical DVD

Sources

External links

Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)

Regular DVD: Sonic Watch & Win Sweepstakes • "Song of Christian" • Mario Kart 64 Lego RacewayChris Chan in the PokéNewsThe City of Cwicville Tour!Animal Crossing DocumentaryThe 24th Wedding Anniversary Special • "So Need a Cute Girl" • "All I Want For Christmas Is a Pretty Girlfriend" • Harvey Birdman commercialPixelated PS3FUTURE MESSAGEKCWC broadcastCWC Slideshow NotesSlideshow images
Director's Cut: ChandlerFamilyChristmas2004ChrisAfterChristmas2004