Christopher Paul Whitney reveal

From CWCki
Revision as of 20:55, 30 March 2017 by Galilean (talk | contribs)
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Christopher Paul Whitney reveal is a video leaked to YouTube by CWCki user Dinglebear on 30 August 2011. Part of the Calling Out series, Chris deflates the big fat balloon of Alec Benson Leary a day ahead of schedule, then proceeds to spend the remainder of the video mocking him by beatboxing, eating a cheap microwave pizza, and calling Alec fat whilst assuring everyone he's thin. Infamously, the "rev-yellation" turned out to be fake, as Alec's "dox" turned out to be the dox of cult food eater Fatman. This is not the first time Chris has incorrectly doxxed someone.


Christopher Paul Whitney reveal
Search for video Youtube, archive
Stardate 30 August 2011
Subject Matter TrollsTrolls Trolls, OtherUnknownIcon.png Food
Performance Style SmugSmug Smug, CrazyCrazy Crazy
Saga AsperchuAsperchu Asperchu, TomgirlTomgirl Tomgirl
Shirt Red with Black TrimRedblacktrim.png The Happy Jack
OFFICIAL and HONEST CWC Videos
previous
Response to ADF
next
SPARKLE like you mean it: ROBEE'S BALLAD


Transcript

ChrisPizza.gif

'Tis another fine day...for REVEALING! 'Cuz I have not heard 'nything from [applies pedo-glasses] Alec Benson Leary, also known as Christopher, annnnnd the due date has been reached! It is time for total...rev-yellation! [Chris spins the camera to show Alec's profile on the TV]

Alec Benson Leary. His real name is Christopher Paul "Fatman" Whit-neeyyy! From Antonio Tetsas--San Antonio, Tetsas. Age: 36. Unemployed and on welfare! His interest include: hot tubbing, video games, retirement, Etsbots, folk music, theft and frauuud, milk, comics, and dip. Aannnnd [operatic] eating onliiiiine!

He's responsible for Asperchu, Asperpedia, and all mockings and slanders associated, and copyright infringement, upon my own characters of Sonichu and--and Asperchu somewhere else. He also has ties wit da Game Place, do-nay-shins and and what not.

Yeah. He's that famous, hot-tubbin' fat man on youtube, makin' mud...and, guess what, eating online! And recently, he ate a whole block a cheese! [operatic] A WHOLE BLOCK OF CHEEEEEESE!!!!

[MC CWC breaks it down]
Ah-ah, ah-ah, oh yeah!
Ah-ah, Aussie-Dossie!
Ah-ah, Aussie-Dossie!
Ah-ah, Aussie-Dossie!
Oh yeah, Aussie-Dossie!
Ah-ah, Aussie-Dossie!
Oh, yeah!

And now for the salt on the wound! I will be eating online! For the once-time, this time! To be enjoyed! Ha-haa! We have here a cheese-stuffed microwaveable pepperoni pizza! And [brandishes can of Nestea] un can of teeeea! Let the fiest begin!

[Chris devours the pizza, munching on it for a minute before holding up the remains to the camera, enjoying the hell out of that pizza] Cheesy goodness, within the crust! [Chris eats the rest, cleans his hands with a paper towel, and drinks his Nestea] Mmm, that was good!

[MC CWC brings the remix]
Oh yeah, Aussie-Dossie!
Oh yeah, Aussie-Dossie!
Oh yeah, but a big difference!
He's fat! Iiiiii'm THIN.

And believe it or not, he's even fatter than Surfshack Tito! Of which, he has met the deadline, with his apology video, and left the internet for good, so nothing else will be revealed about him! So live in peace, Master Tito! But, Christopher Paul, your big fat balloon has been deflated! [Chris mimes a balloon being popped] Stay tuned.


Response to ADF Chris's videos SPARKLE like you mean it: ROBEE'S BALLAD

Fatman's Response

It was later proved that Fatman was not Alec, and that he was telling the truth about his true identity (Christopher Paul Whitney). Much like Chris, Fatman also has an internet cult following, as he has made hundreds of videos in which he eats vast quantities of food on camera, argues with his parents, finds the light of god and in several occasions vomits on himself while taking a bath (seriously, it's fucking nasty).


CWC is a dumb ass
Search for video Youtube, archive
Stardate 14 January 2012
Saga AsperchuAsperchu Asperchu, TomgirlTomgirl Tomgirl


In addition to "CWC is a dumb ass", Alec also posted a video to Ustream of him eating a stick of butter in which he called out Chris.

Transcript

[pause] Hiiiii, folks! Fatman here again, and I just wanna say...that Christian Weston Chandler or "CWP" or "C" or whatever his dumbass name is, is a dumbass, folks. And he's a dumbass 'cause he thinks I stole some Sonichu shitty characters or he thinks I'm Alec Benson Leary but I ain't no Alec Benson Leary, my name's Christopher Paul Whitney, folks. And I live in Rutland, Vermont, not San Antonio, Texas. This guy is such a fuckin' dumbass, folks, oky-day? And um, and uh he's a dumbass and uh, I did not steal his "Sonichu" and I am not Alec Benson Leary, I am Christopher Paul Whitney. So in conclusion: Christian Weston Chandler is a dumbass. And he should stop being a fucking idiot. Until next time, aussie dossie. Bye now.

Sources