Difference between revisions of "Fangs"

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==Powers==
==Powers==
Chris believed his teeth were more menacing than those of ordinary humans. "I was being literal when I talked about my fangs. They're called Eye-Teeth, but they feel and look like fangs of a vampire, dpg [sic] or something to me."<ref>[[Sonichu Girls#Your understanding me fukky (January 1, 2009)]]</ref> Chris revealed his fangs in a series of videos in 2009, in some cases essentially shoving the camera in his mouth. He believed this to be an intimidation tactic, although the actual effect of being exposed to the inside of his mouth is closer to revulsion. One can only infer from these threats that Chris intended to use them to bite his antagonists, but considering the awful state of his teeth he'd be lucky if none fell out in the process.
Chris believes his teeth are more menacing than those of ordinary humans. "I was being literal when I talked about my fangs. They're called Eye-Teeth, but they feel and look like fangs of a vampire, dpg [sic] or something to me."<ref>[[Sonichu Girls#Your understanding me fukky (January 1, 2009)]]</ref> Chris revealed his fangs in a series of videos in 2009, in some cases essentially shoving the camera in his mouth. He believed this to be an intimidation tactic, although the actual effect of being exposed to the inside of his mouth is closer to revulsion. One can only infer from these threats that Chris intended to use them to bite his antagonists, but considering the awful state of his teeth he'd be lucky if none fell out in the process.


Ironically, Chris's [[wikipedia:Canine tooth|canine]] teeth (called "eye-teeth" by Chris<ref>[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_10/Page_18 Issue 10 Page 18] "I HAVE FANGS FOR MY EYE-TEETH"</ref>) are so blunt and rounded that they almost look like incisors (front teeth). The canine teeth do gradually become blunted over the course of a lifetime, since they are involved in chewing - [[Obesity|something Chris does a lot]]. Despite not even having reached middle age, Chris's teeth are already extremely blunt, meaning they would make for even less effective weaponry than the contents of the human mouth already do.
Ironically, Chris's [[wikipedia:Canine tooth|canine]] teeth are so blunt and rounded that they almost look like incisors (front teeth). The canine teeth do gradually become blunted over the course of a lifetime, since they are involved in chewing - [[Obesity|something Chris does a lot]]. Despite not even having reached middle age, Chris's teeth are already extremely blunt, meaning they would make for even less effective weaponry than the contents of the human mouth already do.


Perhaps realizing this, Chris stopped baring his fangs after 2009, and has since upgraded his arsenal to a [[pocket knife]], his [[28 October 2011|automobile]], and [[26 December 2014|pepper spray]].
Perhaps realizing this, Chris stopped baring his fangs after 2009, and has since upgraded his arsenal to a [[pocket knife]], his [[28 October 2011|automobile]], and [[26 December 2014|pepper spray]].


==Wisdom teeth==
==Wisdom teeth==
Chris has had an operation to remove his wisdom teeth. He keeps them in a jar on top of the [[Megan Shrine]] and also made a ''[[Yu-Gi-Oh!]]'' card with them on it. Being the [[Autism|bizarre]] [[Chris and his Ego|narcissist]] that he is, Chris feels the need to immortalize any significant event in his life in some way, be it through short story, comic adaptation, or even custom trading cards. The fact that he finds his removed teeth important enough to think that they would be worth adding to a child's card game says a lot about him.
Chris has had an operation to remove his wisdom teeth. He keeps them in a jar on top of the [[Megan Shrine]] and also made a ''[[Yu-Gi-Oh!]]'' card with them on it. He also thought [[Julie]] would be impressed by this fact, letting her know that "I still have them preserved in a jar with a dash of alcohol."<ref>[[BlueSpike Skype Logs 10]]</ref> Being the [[Autism|bizarre]] [[Chris and his Ego|narcissist]] that he is, Chris feels the need to immortalize any significant event in his life in some way, be it through short story, comic adaptation, or even custom trading cards. The fact that he finds his removed teeth important enough to think that they would be worth adding to a child's card game says a lot about him.


==Appearances==
==Appearances==
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* '''[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 15th, 2009]]:''' Chris did not clearly show his "fangs" in this video, but rather mentioned how he was prepared to show his "faaannngggsss [[Chris and Anger|only when he has to]]." He started to lean forward into the camera while presumably baring his teeth (one cannot clearly see the teeth as the video quality is so poor), but he then swung back to his original posture instead of going for a full close-up.
* '''[[Captain's Log, Stardate January 15th, 2009]]:''' Chris did not clearly show his "fangs" in this video, but rather mentioned how he was prepared to show his "faaannngggsss [[Chris and Anger|only when he has to]]." He started to lean forward into the camera while presumably baring his teeth (one cannot clearly see the teeth as the video quality is so poor), but he then swung back to his original posture instead of going for a full close-up.


*'''[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]:''' On 30 March 2009, Chris threatened Encyclopedia Dramatica and Clyde Cash by punching a doll, baring his teeth, and damaging his camera.
*'''[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]:''' On 30 March 2009, Chris threatened [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] and [[Clyde Cash]] by punching a doll, baring his teeth, and damaging his camera.


*'''[[Chris Calls Clyde Out]]:''' On 23 April 2009, Chris again threatened Clyde by acting like an idiot, deliberately giving his audience a close-up of his eye-teeth and whitish tongue.
*'''[[Chris Calls Clyde Out]]:''' On 23 April 2009, Chris again threatened Clyde by acting like an idiot, deliberately giving his audience a close-up of his eye-teeth and whitish tongue.
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* '''[[Sign Destruction Video]]:''' On 6 December 2009, Chris threatened [[Vivian Gee]] by ripping apart a paper sign left in his yard, and then bit his [[Clown Doll|clown's]] head off with his infected gums. He exposed his yellowed and rotting teeth to the audience, undoubtedly to show off his sugar-encrusted enamel.
* '''[[Sign Destruction Video]]:''' On 6 December 2009, Chris threatened [[Vivian Gee]] by ripping apart a paper sign left in his yard, and then bit his [[Clown Doll|clown's]] head off with his infected gums. He exposed his yellowed and rotting teeth to the audience, undoubtedly to show off his sugar-encrusted enamel.


==In the comics==
==In the comics==
In [[Sonichu 10]], the devil [[Beel]] manages to steal [[Chris-chan Sonichu]]'s [[medallion]], causing him to revert back to ordinary Chris. At this nadir, Chris discovers that his powers actually reside in his [[Amnyfest Ring|high school ring]], and he saves the day. To further bolster his self-esteem, Chris takes this moment to show his fangs, noting, "I have fangs for my eye-teeth." This turns out to have no bearing on the plot.


==Gallery==
==Gallery==
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==See also==
==See also==
* [[Chris and anger]]
* [[Chris and anger]]
* [[Chris and health]]


{{CWC-isms}}
{{CWC-isms}}

Revision as of 17:59, 19 January 2015

SHOW MAH FANGS!.jpg

He has them and isn't afraid to show them.

The Horror

Originally assumed to be yellowish as a result of poor video quality, Chris's fangs are more likely discolored as a result of the copious amounts of soda he drinks (which probably has other effects as well).[1] The fact that he has multiple visible cavities seems to support this, although Chris could just be too lazy to brush his teeth. What is certain is that despite his claim to visit a dentist every six months, the inside of his mouth is even more horrifying than the outside.

Powers

Chris believes his teeth are more menacing than those of ordinary humans. "I was being literal when I talked about my fangs. They're called Eye-Teeth, but they feel and look like fangs of a vampire, dpg [sic] or something to me."[2] Chris revealed his fangs in a series of videos in 2009, in some cases essentially shoving the camera in his mouth. He believed this to be an intimidation tactic, although the actual effect of being exposed to the inside of his mouth is closer to revulsion. One can only infer from these threats that Chris intended to use them to bite his antagonists, but considering the awful state of his teeth he'd be lucky if none fell out in the process.

Ironically, Chris's canine teeth are so blunt and rounded that they almost look like incisors (front teeth). The canine teeth do gradually become blunted over the course of a lifetime, since they are involved in chewing - something Chris does a lot. Despite not even having reached middle age, Chris's teeth are already extremely blunt, meaning they would make for even less effective weaponry than the contents of the human mouth already do.

Perhaps realizing this, Chris stopped baring his fangs after 2009, and has since upgraded his arsenal to a pocket knife, his automobile, and pepper spray.

Wisdom teeth

Chris has had an operation to remove his wisdom teeth. He keeps them in a jar on top of the Megan Shrine and also made a Yu-Gi-Oh! card with them on it. He also thought Julie would be impressed by this fact, letting her know that "I still have them preserved in a jar with a dash of alcohol."[3] Being the bizarre narcissist that he is, Chris feels the need to immortalize any significant event in his life in some way, be it through short story, comic adaptation, or even custom trading cards. The fact that he finds his removed teeth important enough to think that they would be worth adding to a child's card game says a lot about him.

Appearances

  • Captain's Log, Stardate January 15th, 2009: Chris did not clearly show his "fangs" in this video, but rather mentioned how he was prepared to show his "faaannngggsss only when he has to." He started to lean forward into the camera while presumably baring his teeth (one cannot clearly see the teeth as the video quality is so poor), but he then swung back to his original posture instead of going for a full close-up.
  • Chris Calls Clyde Out: On 23 April 2009, Chris again threatened Clyde by acting like an idiot, deliberately giving his audience a close-up of his eye-teeth and whitish tongue.
  • 12 October 2009: Chris again acted like an insane retard, showing both his teeth and his buttcrack.
  • Sign Destruction Video: On 6 December 2009, Chris threatened Vivian Gee by ripping apart a paper sign left in his yard, and then bit his clown's head off with his infected gums. He exposed his yellowed and rotting teeth to the audience, undoubtedly to show off his sugar-encrusted enamel.

In the comics

In Sonichu 10, the devil Beel manages to steal Chris-chan Sonichu's medallion, causing him to revert back to ordinary Chris. At this nadir, Chris discovers that his powers actually reside in his high school ring, and he saves the day. To further bolster his self-esteem, Chris takes this moment to show his fangs, noting, "I have fangs for my eye-teeth." This turns out to have no bearing on the plot.

Gallery

Sources

See also

The CWC-tionary

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Sex: China | Comeuppance | Duck | JULAY | Mass debating | Negligent | Pedofork | Pickle | Recycling | Soul Bonding | Virgin with rage | Virginia is for Virgins | Women's rights

Himself: Biological clock | Butt garments | Captain's Log | Christian Love Day | DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS | Fuzzy-Wuzzies & Prickly-Wicklies | Honest Content | I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD | Monthly tugboat | Muscle bra | Random-access humor | Saga | Scale of Respect | Tomgirl |

Stressors: 4-cent_garbage | GOPony | HEXBox | JERKS | Jerkops | Kick the Autistic | Manajerks | Naïve | Niggos | Pmurt | Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens | Slow-in-the-minds | Tobacky

Fantasies: Curse-ye-ha-me-ha | Dimension | Fangs | Godjesus | Iron Curtain | OC | Un-clit

Comics: Anchuent Prophecy | Da Update | Electric Hedgehog Pokemon | Nombie-zazis | Parody | Rosechu | Sonichu | Sub-Episodes | Sweetbolt


See also: Chris and English | List of phrases Chris copied from media