Jackie E-mails 12

This page covers e-mails exchanged between Chris and Jackie from 31 August 2010 to 2 September 2010. Chris reports that Clyde Cash and Surfshack Tito have still failed to come through with the $9,001 for destroying his PS3. Chris makes up excuses for not drawing the pickles Jackie wanted, answers a series of questions that Jackie demanded answers to in the previous e-mail. Jackie repeats that Chris drew his fantasy, not hers. Chris gives his plan for raising money for Otakon, consisting of selling games for store credit, scamming his parents, and buying a new PS3. He offers to make a laughable bet with Jackie to prove he's not addicted to video games. Jackie calls bullshit and gives a heartfelt speech about how Chris's lack of effort is bad for their relationship. Chris ignores this, worrying momentarily about Patti's remains.

Chris also states that his habitual purchases include lottery tickets, which he thinks is an investment (and not a form of gambling in reality). These things are important.

August 31, 2010 - 7:08pm

Chris, I asked for my drawing to be of us in a pool with a bunch of guys jerking off all around us. You drew one guy and a bunch of women. So you didn't draw my drawing, you drew something you wanted to draw instead. And begging your pardon, but I don't see why you "can't help" what the people in the drawing look like when you are the one drawing it.

Sigh...

You say you meant it when you said you were moving forward with your life. I don't care if you lie to the trolls, they haven't earned honesty from you. But I think I have. If you think you can live without the console, then why don't you try it?

Thank you for answering my questions. Let me try to respond to your answers individually:

1. So you just had a momentary influence of wanting to get the new PS3, even though getting the money is currently a problem? Does that mean you're rethinking it now, and after you get over the shock of the current situation you would rather not pursue a new PS3?

2. I think I understand what you're saying here. Although in fairness I should let you know that I'm just not really that into video games in general. When I settle down with the person I'm going to be with for the rest of my life, I certainly plan to create memories... but I hadn't planned on that being with video games. Don't get me wrong, we can play video games together. I just don't think a video game is that significant. There's a whole wide world of richer experiences that two people can share. (We certainly won't be playing video games for our first several dates, at least.)

3. This is one I still have a problem with. You're saying that you lied to your parents so you wouldn't have to deal with the consequences of them knowing a truth that they deserve to hear. Don't you see something wrong with that? If you're telling lies before your parents, you're telling lies before God. Remember the Fourth Commandment: Honor Thy Father and Mother. You are mad that the trolls don't respect the "God Blessed" truth in what you tell them, but you don't seem concerned that you are making God sad by disrespecting your parents.

Your hypothetical example is one I can understand. In fact, I've had very similar situations in my life (I usually threw out or gave away the clothes, not burned them). When I was a teenager, I was pretty flighty with my clothes; I collected way too many that I didn't need, and a lot of them just sat in my closet. My parents knew about it, because I didn't hide it from them. And eventually they started getting mad about it and lecturing me. And at the time I didn't like being lectured, but you know what? It wasn't the end of the world. And I learned a lesson: Don't throw away so much money on clothes I don't need, be more respectful of my possessions. And I'm better off for it now. Maybe if you actually owned up to your parents once in a while instead of trying to spin the truth every time you knew they would get mad, you would have learned some lessons about courage and temperance like I did.

4. Well, I guess I can understand why they're so worried about the idea of trolls influencing you. But I do think that their fears are much worse than they would be if you told them the truth and didn't leave out important facts. See, Chris? Lying to your parents to stop them from getting mad doesn't just prevent all problems - You never own up to your own actions like you should, so what choice do your parents have but to believe that you're being manipulated? You've caused them to underestimate you all by yourself.

5. I know you didn't say the words exactly, but that was the impression I was getting. Because things like going to Otakon, coming to see me, and so forth never seemed to inspire you to want to get rid of any of your video games. But now you're willing to sell off all your Nintendo 64 and other games, for the sole purpose of... obtaining another video game. Getting a PS3 inspires you to move mountains but when it comes to me, you just want to wait for me to come to you so you don't have to spend anything.

Well, anyway... I'm looking forward to seeing the shadow-interview video. You can send me a prototype again if you want so I can look it over and offer advice, before you release a final version. It might be cool if you did like a cut-away sort of thing, so the camera would be on you (Chris) while you talk, and then shift to Jinkies for his answers. Or something like that would be cool.

Also, I found this thread: http://trollingtrain.10.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=1242 Did they dig something up in your yard? I didn't read it very closely, I didn't have a whole lot of time.

Talk to you later,

Jackie@undefined

September 1, 2010 - 1:09pm

The drawing was not what I asked for, pure and simple. I'm looking at it right now, there is only ONE guy in the picture, not four. Over and over you drew what you wanted to, not what I wanted. And why would I want to stare at a bunch of naked women? I'm straight, not a lesbian. And now you're just arguing about it instead of redrawing it. I thought you liked drawing. I thought you liked drawing for ME.

Am I supposed to be proud of you for lying to me? For claiming you could go without your precious PS3 for months when you had no intention of doing so? Am I supposed to be proud that you sold some pokemon games you don't "require" for the sole purpose of buying a new console you also don't require? I don't think the "huge chunk of respect" your parents have given you is really worth anything, because it's based on lies. The lie that your PS3 died before you destroyed it, as well a the lie by omission that the trolls are manipulating you. I believe that that was their own idea, but you are conveniently letting them continue to believe it instead of owning up and explaining that destroying it was all your idea. I wouldn't be proud of earning their respect if I were you. I would be ashamed of having tricked them out of it.

I have several problems with your "deal". Firstly, please don't propose it to me as if I have already accepted it, or assuming that I will accept it. I do not accept it.

Secondly, it is not at all a deal. It is quite insulting. You are going back on your claim that you could go without your PS3 for months. That was basically like a promise. You PROMISED me, and you are reneging on it. You talk about how the trolls are renegers for not paying you the money, but why should I care about them? YOU are the reneger, Chris. YOU are the reneger.

Thirdly, you have lied to me numerous times, your claim that you can go without the PS3 being the most recent one. But it gets worse when you couple your lies to ME with your rationalization for lying to your PARENTS. You said that you lie to your parents to "protect" them from feeling bad about what you've done. So it's perfectly reasonable to assume that you will lie to me and claim you haven't been playing video games even though you have, isn't it? Because you will rationalize it by saying you need to "protect" me from feeling ashamed. Given that you are bargaining like an addict to get out of your promise to me to let the PS3 go, I think it's fair to assume you will continue down that path and play video games anyway, despite what your little deal promises. You know full well it is not possible for me to be your eye-witness for an entire month, Chris. I can't babysit you 24/7. You offered that specifically because you wanted to look good, you knew I would have to turn down being your eye-witness. So when I'm busy at school or out or whatever, you'll play your games carefree, then lie to me and say you haven't played them because you want to make me think I should be proud of you. Right? You know, if you've wronged someone (like your parents or me), they have a right to be mad at you. By hiding the truth from them, you are further wronging them, not protecting them.

And Fourthly, and most sadly... you're offering to bribe me with $50? I have $50 in my purse right now. I don't need your $50. I don't want your $50. What I want is a boyfriend who is willing to actually TRY to improve himself and who will hold true and honest to his promises, not abandon them when they get difficult and offer me a bribe to get out of them. How do I "win" by getting $50? Do you really think that's just as good as seeing you fight your pathetic addiction? You'd be the only one who would win, because you'd get out of Honestly Chris, you're making me cry right now.

Don't tell me your "financial situation" makes traveling impossible while at the same time you've quickly acquired $300 in order to buy your precious little video game console. Clearly your PS3 is more important to you than me. It took you weeks to get me my drawing, and even after several tries none of them were the drawing I wanted, but I bet you were still playing your PS3 for hours every day. And once your PS3 was gone, all your efforts became devoted to obtaining a replacement, while I sit here in Tennessee alone. By the way, take a look at this site: https://www.greyhound.com/farefinder/step2.aspx?Redirect=Y&Version=1.0&OriginID=330319&OriginCity=Charlottesville&OriginState=VA&DestinationID=400610&DestinationCity=Nashville&DestinationState=TN&Children=0&Legs=1&Adults=1&Seniors=0&DYear=110&DMonth=9&DDay=4&DHr= A bus ticket from your place to where I am would only cost $118, much less than a $300 computer. And I told you you'd be staying with me and we could split even on food, and you'd be riding back with me so you wouldn't need to pay for a return bus ticket. Since a PS3 costs nearly triple a bus ticket, I guess you want a PS3 nearly three times more than you want to see me.

Since it seems to work when I make a bullet-list of specific items I want you to address, let me again write out a list of questions and comments I want you to answer:

1. I want you to tell your parents that you lied about the PS3 dying, and tell them that your PS3 was working perfectly fine when you decided to destroy it. 2. I want you to explain how you think I am supposed to feel about the fact that you never intended to keep your promise to me of going without the PS3 for months. 3. I want you to explain to me how you think God feels about your lies to me and to your parents. 4. I want you to explain to me how you think God feels about your gluttonous addiction problem, and your unwillingness to treat it. 5. I want you to explain how your devotion to obtaining a new PS3 and your total unwillingness to consider coming to see me are not clear signs that you prefer video games over me. 6. Most importantly... I want you to go til New Years before getting a new PS3. That's January 1, 2011. That's four months away. You promised you could go for months, so show it.

Notice how that list doesn't have anything about me wanting you to come to visit me in Tennessee? That's because I don't want a guy to come visit me when it's obvious he doesn't really want to see me. It's sad, it really is. I thought you cared about me. But you aren't willing to actually pay anything to do see me. Not like you're willing to pay for your PS3. I'd love to have you here with me, I thought we could maybe have our first time together even. But if you don't want to be with me, there's nothing to be gained by trying to coerce you.

I want so much for this to work, Chris. I've been trying so hard. But what signs have you given me? What work have you done for me? Why are you not willing to show me anything but empty promises that you immediately back out on when they become inconvenient? Do you think a girlfriend is something you can just shut out when she becomes inconvenient? I guess I'll be sitting here alone til the end of my trip then, unless you care to prove me wrong. I promise I'll call you when I get home. Although given how little promises mean to you, maybe you won't mind if they start to mean as little to me, too. If you want me to feel differently, you'll have to actually do something to show me.

Talk to you later,

Jackie

P.S. You complain about the trolls blowing smoke to you, but it seems like you've been blowing a lot of smoke to me this whole time.@undefined

September 1, 2010 - 3:38pm

By the way, I suggest you look harder where they said they dug up your dog. You say you took one glance and then ignored it, but they specifically said they were careful to leave no trace. Doesn't your deceased dog deserve at least as much time as your deceased PS3? http://trollingtrain.10.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?t=95

Jackie@undefined

September 2, 2010 - 11:06am

Chris, where have you been? I didn't hear from you at all yesterday, is everything alright? I'm starting to get a little worried.

Jackie@undefined

September 2, 2010 - 3:55pm

So you got a new PS3 afterall?

Actually, I decided to come home early. I got in early this morning. I was thinking about calling you, but since you decided that re-downloading the same baby games you've already played hundreds of hours in was so important that you couldn't spare ten minutes to write me an email yesterday, I'm not sure when I'll call you. When I didn't hear from you I thought that maybe my email was too "stressful" for you to read and you decided to simply ignore me. I have stuff I can do that's more important than a guy who doesn't care about me.

Clearly, since you had a choice between writing to me and playing your PS3, and you chose the PS3, that means the PS3 is the "shine in your days". I am obviously not. I'm not a hamster, Chris. You can't trick me just by repeating words that you think sound romantic. If you ever want me "at your side", you will answer every item on the list I just sent you for the second time. You will DO SOMETHING to show me that you care rather than just repeating EMPTY WORDS. How many times must I tell you that it is SOO OBVIOUS that your words don't mean anything alone?

Please don't talk to me about your father or what cartoons you watch when you completely ignored the serious letter that I spent over an hour writing to you. I'll repost it below, and if you actually care about me at all, you'll actually read the whole thing and respond to it this time.

The drawing was not what I asked for, pure and simple. I'm looking at it right now, there is only ONE guy in the picture, not four. Over and over you drew what you wanted to, not what I wanted. And why would I want to stare at a bunch of naked women? I'm straight, not a lesbian. And now you're just arguing about it instead of redrawing it. I thought you liked drawing. I thought you liked drawing for ME.

Am I supposed to be proud of you for lying to me? For claiming you could go without your precious PS3 for months when you had no intention of doing so? Am I supposed to be proud that you sold some pokemon games you don't "require" for the sole purpose of buying a new console you also don't require? I don't think the "huge chunk of respect" your parents have given you is really worth anything, because it's based on lies. The lie that your PS3 died before you destroyed it, as well a the lie by omission that the trolls are manipulating you. I believe that that was their own idea, but you are conveniently letting them continue to believe it instead of owning up and explaining that destroying it was all your idea. I wouldn't be proud of earning their respect if I were you. I would be ashamed of having tricked them out of it.

I have several problems with your "deal". Firstly, please don't propose it to me as if I have already accepted it, or assuming that I will accept it. I do not accept it.

Secondly, it is not at all a deal. It is quite insulting. You are going back on your claim that you could go without your PS3 for months. That was basically like a promise. You PROMISED me, and you are reneging on it. You talk about how the trolls are renegers for not paying you the money, but why should I care about them? YOU are the reneger, Chris. YOU are the reneger.

Thirdly, you have lied to me numerous times, your claim that you can go without the PS3 being the most recent one. But it gets worse when you couple your lies to ME with your rationalization for lying to your PARENTS. You said that you lie to your parents to "protect" them from feeling bad about what you've done. So it's perfectly reasonable to assume that you will lie to me and claim you haven't been playing video games even though you have, isn't it? Because you will rationalize it by saying you need to "protect" me from feeling ashamed. Given that you are bargaining like an addict to get out of your promise to me to let the PS3 go, I think it's fair to assume you will continue down that path and play video games anyway, despite what your little deal promises. You know full well it is not possible for me to be your eye-witness for an entire month, Chris. I can't babysit you 24/7. You offered that specifically because you wanted to look good, you knew I would have to turn down being your eye-witness. So when I'm busy at school or out or whatever, you'll play your games carefree, then lie to me and say you haven't played them because you want to make me think I should be proud of you. Right? You know, if you've wronged someone (like your parents or me), they have a right to be mad at you. By hiding the truth from them, you are further wronging them, not protecting them.

And Fourthly, and most sadly... you're offering to bribe me with $50? I have $50 in my purse right now. I don't need your $50. I don't want your $50. What I want is a boyfriend who is willing to actually TRY to improve himself and who will hold true and honest to his promises, not abandon them when they get difficult and offer me a bribe to get out of them. How do I "win" by getting $50? Do you really think that's just as good as seeing you fight your pathetic addiction? You'd be the only one who would win, because you'd get out of Honestly Chris, you're making me cry right now.

Don't tell me your "financial situation" makes traveling impossible while at the same time you've quickly acquired $300 in order to buy your precious little video game console. Clearly your PS3 is more important to you than me. It took you weeks to get me my drawing, and even after several tries none of them were the drawing I wanted, but I bet you were still playing your PS3 for hours every day. And once your PS3 was gone, all your efforts became devoted to obtaining a replacement, while I sit here in Tennessee alone. By the way, take a look at this site: https://www.greyhound.com/farefinder/step2.aspx?Redirect=Y&Version=1.0&OriginID=330319&OriginCity=Charlottesville&OriginState=VA&DestinationID=400610&DestinationCity=Nashville&DestinationState=TN&Children=0&Legs=1&Adults=1&Seniors=0&DYear=110&DMonth=9&DDay=4&DHr= A bus ticket from your place to where I am would only cost $118, much less than a $300 computer. And I told you you'd be staying with me and we could split even on food, and you'd be riding back with me so you wouldn't need to pay for a return bus ticket. Since a PS3 costs nearly triple a bus ticket, I guess you want a PS3 nearly three times more than you want to see me.

Since it seems to work when I make a bullet-list of specific items I want you to address, let me again write out a list of questions and comments I want you to answer:

1. I want you to tell your parents that you lied about the PS3 dying, and tell them that your PS3 was working perfectly fine when you decided to destroy it. 2. I want you to explain how you think I am supposed to feel about the fact that you never intended to keep your promise to me of going without the PS3 for months. 3. I want you to explain to me how you think God feels about your lies to me and to your parents. 4. I want you to explain to me how you think God feels about your gluttonous addiction problem, and your unwillingness to treat it. 5. I want you to explain how your devotion to obtaining a new PS3 and your total unwillingness to consider coming to see me are not clear signs that you prefer video games over me. 6. Most importantly... I want you to go til New Years before playing your PS3. That's January 1, 2011. That's four months away. You promised you could go for months, so show it.

Notice how that list doesn't have anything about me wanting you to come to visit me in Tennessee? That's because I don't want a guy to come visit me when it's obvious he doesn't really want to see me. It's sad, it really is. I thought you cared about me. But you aren't willing to actually pay anything to do see me. Not like you're willing to pay for your PS3. I'd love to have you here with me, I thought we could maybe have our first time together even. But if you don't want to be with me, there's nothing to be gained by trying to coerce you.

I want so much for this to work, Chris. I've been trying so hard. But what signs have you given me? What work have you done for me? Why are you not willing to show me anything but empty promises that you immediately back out on when they become inconvenient? Do you think a girlfriend is something you can just shut out when she becomes inconvenient? I guess I'll be sitting here alone til the end of my trip then, unless you care to prove me wrong. I promise I'll call you when I get home. Although given how little promises mean to you, maybe you won't mind if they start to mean as little to me, too. If you want me to feel differently, you'll have to actually do something to show me.

Talk to you later,

Jackie

P.S. You complain about the trolls blowing smoke to you, but it seems like you've been blowing a lot of smoke to me this whole time.

P.P.S. Dogs decompose when they die. If you loved your dog, you wouldn't just assume it was all safe and go play your little video games.@undefined

September 2, 2010 - 3:57pm

Chris, I just sent you a very long email, but honestly I have a feeling you'll just ignore it because it takes too many minutes to read, so I'm sending you this short one to make sure you understand me: Read the entirety of that long email, think about it, and respond to EVERY ONE of my questions and concerns. I don't care if it takes you two hours to do this, you do it. Or I'm through with you.

Jackie@undefined