User:AAE/Chris's TRUE and HONEST Gender

What is Chris's TRUE and HONEST gender identity? That is the question.

This topic has sparked fervent debate among the Christorian community. Kiwi Farms members overwhelmingly call Chris "he," and so does the CWCki main space. Geno Samuel called her "he" up until Chris started using she/her pronouns, making the change rather seamlessly I might add. The issue is even divided among trans folks covering Chris: Natalie Wynn (Contrapoints) used she/her, while Rose of Dawn used he/him.

It is my personal belief that Chris is a genuine trans woman, a "troon" if you prefer. She just has some obstacles that not all trans women have to face.

But isn't it just the autism doing the talking?
Not exactly. Most studies on the matter have found a correlation between autism and being trans, but none have actually gone beyond educated guesses when it comes to the cause. There's a pretty big leap between saying that more autistic folks are trans and saying why they're trans. Quite frankly, looking for an explanation is a waste of time.

Some argue that autistic people can only think they're trans, but that is patronizing and invalidating. Autistic people don't completely lack insight as a rule, and they are actually less likely to be swayed by pressure to conform without an incentive for conforming.

Besides, Chris is resistant to change. She couldn't have possibly transitioned on a whim.

Autistic trans folks do exist. Look up Ella Grant. She's feminine as ever as well.

But what about the extreme male brain?
It's time to delve into the world of neuroscience.

While some psychs still perpetuate the outdated "extreme male brain" theory of autism, modern brain research has found that autistic brains are actually quite androgynous. While some areas of the brain are masculinized in autistics, others are feminized, such as the parts related to sensory and motor processing. If anything, autistic folks have extreme non-binary brains!

Furthermore, the differences between male and female brains are not absolute, even in cis folks: there is an 89.6% overlap between male and female brains, compared to a 31.7 overlap in terms of height. Brain sex is bimodal, not binary.

In fact, for our purposes, it's pretty irrelevant. Research has found that the main difference between trans women and men pre-HRT is in the putamen. This tells us that the putamen is the brain's gender center. It it what leads to neurological femaleness, and not just femininity.

Femininity vs. Womanhood
There's a difference between being feminine and identifying as a trans woman. One is purely cultural, and the other is a complex combination of neurology, psychology, and culture. Compare someone like James Charles or David Bowie to the many tomboys and butch women of the world. Yes, trans women don't have to be highly feminine to be truly trans. If cis women can like cars, video games, or even suits, why can't a trans woman? To argue otherwise is to appeal to generalizations and stereotypes. This isn't the 50s anymore.

While Chris might not have many classically feminine traits, she does have many classically womanly traits, and common traits among trans woman.

Chris's childhood
Chris has always identified more strongly with girls than with boys. She had few male friends growing up, instead gravitating towards a slew of gal-pals and other female acquaintances. While her interest in video games is stereotypically male, it isn't a conventionally masculine interest in the way that sports are. Also, Chris has always stuck with casual, fun games, instead of violent shoot-em-up games.

But didn't Chris constantly insinuate she was a straight man?
There's this cool thing called lying.

But even if she was serious, not all trans women have the language or clarity to accurately describe their identity at an early age. Many try cross-dressing on weekends, online-only transitioning, non-binary identification, avoiding labels entirely, or inventing a label that fits them best.

Chris wasn't the first to use the term tomgirl (or the related janegirl), but those terms are so rare that most dictionaries still don't list them. English doesn't really have an AMAB equivalent of tomboy: one that doesn't relate to gay sexuality (not twink, fruit, etc.), that refers to identity instead of action (not cross-dresser, transvestite, etc.), or that isn't a charged insult (not sissy boy).

"Femboy" is a more recent term that is just starting to gain traction, and "metro/metrosexual" was popular in the 2010s. But none of those terms feel quite right to a closeted trans woman, since the issue of dysphoria is with maleness, not masculinity.

"Men who want to be women" are generally looked down on by society at large. Freud went on about penis envy, but laughed at the idea of vagina envy. Trans women who just come out often get lectured about how great being a man is supposed to be, and that they should be thankful they don't have to deal with periods. Trans women in women's restrooms face great scrutiny. People act like they'll do a number to the cis women in the restroom, but the only numbers that go on in there are number 1 and number 2.

Chris's attraction to women, and how it differs from that of a straight man
Chris's attraction to women has much more in common with lesbian/bisexual attraction than straight attraction.

The most obvious difference is identity. A straight man wants a woman who will make him feel like a man – who will serve as his opposite for him to provide and protect for. A lesbian or bisexual woman wants a woman who will make her feel like a woman – who will serve as her equal or form roles outside the predetermined framework of heterosexuality. Suddenly, Chris wanting her potential partner to be the provider doesn't sound so weird.

Chris's vocal tone shows another main way she differs from a straight man. Normally, guys deepen their voices when talking to women they're attracted to, while women raise their vocal pitch. When Chris talked to Kacey, Ivy, and other love interests, her voice raised in pitch. Sometimes, Chris's voice went higher than Kacey's! People who see Chris as a man often read this trait as just Chris being creepy, but it makes so much more sense in the context of gender.

Furthermore, the infamous JULAY video shows Chris assuming female positions. Many said she just was paying more attention to women in porn, but wouldn't that just mean she identifies more with the women? So many of Chris's "oddities" are perfectly normal for lesbians.

You can't say /'kɹɪstᵊɫ/ without saying /'kɹɪs/.
Chris has always been obsessed with the name Crystal. Or Crystle. Or Krystal. Or Cristal. Or perhaps Chris-tal. In Chris's words, it's a name that sounds similar to hers, but has a nice ring to it. There's Chris's imaginary twin sister named Crystal, Chris's future daughter who will be named Crystal, Kristal-LA Trois Rosechu, Cryzel Rosechu, and many more variations.

Chris's full name is Christine, but what if she originally wanted it to be Crystal? It's a bit more distant in spelling and etymology from Christian, and her twin sister was arguably a gender-swapped version of Classic Chris. Cis people generally don't spend lots of time thinking about what their gender-swapped selves would look like, or get obsessed with a name.

The curse of genetics: Things Chris can't help
Passing isn't all about hormones and surgery – for many, you have to win the genetic lottery to begin with. Bone structure can't be changed after the early 20s, with a few exceptions. For example, facial feminization surgery can alter the bone structure of the face. However, it is expensive, and not all insurance plans cover it. There is no surgery to remove height (minus cutting off the legs) or narrow the shoulders. Surgeries do exist to broaden the hips, but hormones alone can often do the job.

While HRT can prevent hair loss, it generally can't reverse it. Even Rogaine isn't perfect, and most wigs within Chris's budget will look obviously synthetic. Judging by pictures of Chris's childhood bowlcut, she might be able to pull off straight-across bangs or even '70s curtain bangs, but with that much hairline recession, even that might not save her.

For every Blaire White, Kim Petras, or Samantha Lux in this world, you have Christine, cursed with a barrel chest and receding hairline. None of that is a reflection on Chris's status as a trans woman, though. It's no fault of her own, either. If her body and mind matched perfectly, she'd just be a plain old cis woman.

It's all in the voice
Chris does have an advantage in the voice department; her voice has always been naturally high and bright. Instead of using falsetto, she could be the perfect candidate for voice training. Voice training focuses on using less "weight" when speaking, replacing the nasal tone with something softer while still keeping the pitch and brightness. Many trans women are unaware of this, though, and focus exclusively on pitch. Voice training is notoriously difficult, and I don't blame Chris for not being able to go through with it. Chris also came out before TransVoiceLessons (the gold standard of voice training) rose to prominence. TVL's pre-training voice was actually lower and more masculine than Chris's pre-transition voice, but her new voice is more feminine than even Cyndi Lauper! Chris's tone-deafness might be the main obstacle here.

Chris's voice is also less monotone and more sing-song, as is the case with most autistic women.

Trans life in a conservative suburb
Chris comes from a conservative background. Her parents are conservative. Her hometown, Ruckersville, is conservative. Nearby Charlottesville is conservative, outside college and yuppie circles. In fact, the whole state of Virginia is a fine blend of the East's indifference and the South's conservatism. It pretty much goes without saying that Chris would be better off in LA, San Francisco, Seattle, or somewhere in the West.

Conclusion
Christine Weston Chandler might not be a passing trans woman, a classically feminine trans woman, or a particularly graceful one. However, she is still a trans woman. She's just unlucky.