Christian's Update 13 September 2008

Christian's Update 13 September 2008 (officially Christian's Update Sept. 13, 2008) is an update video Chris uploaded to YouTube on 13 September 2008.

Recovering from the uploading of his nude photos on ED, Chris insists that Blanca is real, and therefore was not responsible for tricking him. (He is, of course, half right. The troll who leaked the nudes wasn't Blanca, but Blanca was still, in fact, a troll.)

Chris goes on to inform his TRUE and LOYAL fanbase of bootleg Sonichu merchandise sold by Jimmy Hill, and calls for a boycott. He also gives an update on the progress of the Sonichu video game, as the project is currently on hold due to JK Productions being another group of trolls playing a prank on him. Chris reiterates his call for all Sonichu fans to pressure Nintendo and Sega to work with Chris to make the Sonichu game.

Chris stutters all over the place in this video, making his words and phrases very hard to understand. Also, at the very end, Chris's cell phone is heard ringing with a MIDI version of Britney Spears' "(You Drive Me) Crazy" as its ringtone.

Video
"Blanca’s real. I talked to her."

Transcript
September 13, 2008. Update.

Eh, y'know, I've gotten over the mess! It's all settled now.

Blanca’s real. I talked to her. [his eyes briefly widen to the proportions of a caricature of a psychotic] Yeah,she called me. So, as for the, uh, person who--as for the jerk who, uh, posed...with the, a--“KawaiiKitsune” name? If I knew who you were, I'd give you a kick in the bawls. But I can't, because I don't know who or where you are. Buh bye bay nose. But if anybody knows the whereabouts of the...jerk...and just happens to be nearby, or within the state? Give him a swick kick for me.

Anyway, as for--anyway, I'm happy now. I'm happy. So, uh, thank y'all for your emotional support, those of y'all who sent me e-mails and messages. Alright. So, onto, uh, other pressing issues. Yeah.

The--first off, the, uh, toys in the UK: they're definitely, uh, fake. I have never approved any merchandise or distribution of such [pronounces this like “search”] merchandise yet. So, therefore, the advertisements of such, uh, Sonichu merchandise...in the UK? All fake. Uhhh...possibly, this guy named, uh... “Jerry... Hill” I think his name was? But...I mean, uh, that's, uh, from a suggestion from--uh, from--uh, that's a name I got from--uh, one of--from--uh, one- from one of my fans.

Yeah. So, uh, you know, his initials are “JH”. If y--I'm sure y'all have heard about him, uh... the g--the--uh, the g--the, uh, person who told me about, uh, this-- told me about, uh, “JH”... also, apparently, sold fake stuff for Warner Bros., and, uh, they sued him...and they arrested him, so, apparently...he could be the one that's, uh...trying to make a...f--f--fast buck off of...fake merchandise. Alright.

So, uh, anyway...boycott th--buying such--buying those-- buyin’ the merchandise from the UK...buying any merchandise from there. Boycott it! Don't do it.

As for the, uh, game--uh, as for the, uh, video game...yeah, that's, uh, tempor--that’s temporary on pause, because apparently, “JK Productions”...they were a fake company, as I received an e-mail from the, uh, prankster behind that--behind that, uh...pull of the leg. Him confessing. So, uh, anyway, it's temporary on pause, so...all my fans: talk to Nin--t--tend--talk to Nintendo. Talk to Sega! Tell 'em to come talk to me! I wanna get Sonich--get the Sonichu game idea...up in the air with--between Nintendo and Sega.

So...yeah. That basically covers the, uh, topics of, uh, interest for now. So, uh... [cell phone starts ringing with a “(You Drive Me) Crazy” ringtone] you know who I am. I'll talk to y--I'll, uh, give another update when I feel like it. Peace out.