April 2010



Throughout April 2010, Chris's online activity was pretty sporadic, both due to him trying to stay off and free himself from the influence of the internet (probably prompted by an outside force), and because a new potential sweetheart, named "Jackie," had started to exchange emails with him.

The month started with the CWCipedia looking like its main contributor's duck. That is, to say, mangled beyond recognition. The website was stripped of its flesh and colors, pictures and formatting, leaving behind only a skeleton of HTML code, like the remains of an animal that's been dug up after many years in the ground. This was probably due to 110mb being shit as usual.

On 5 April, Chris's second The HooK Café ad was discovered, further cementing the fact that he only wants a sweetheart for the hanky-panky. Said ad was deleted on 9 April.

A week later, Chris returned to The GAMe PLACe in an attempt to get his permaban removed so he could start bogarting everything. The manager, Michael Snyder, was unmoved and told Chris to get out, prompting Chris to show himself as a horrible bigot once again by using the word "Jew" as an insult (even though Michael is not Jewish). Chris posted a video of the incident, then posted an image on the CWCipedia asking his fans, the same ones he compared to trolls a month ago, to troll him and ask why he's playing Kick the Autistic. Not only did this, as expected, not work, Michael was, quite to the contrary, subsequently hailed as a hero for keeping the anti-semitic manchild down.

After his rejection from The GAMe PLACe, however, Chris once again turned to Sonichu, for the first time all month, when he wrote several biographies for the Chaotic Combo. He followed up with a lulzworthy history of all female interaction he has ever had. He ranked his childhood teacher among potential crushes too, just for extra WTF.

Chris managed to keep quiet about Jackie (probably having learned something from the whole Wallflower incident), and her existence was not known to the general public of trolls, until she leaked the whole email correspondence and a deliciously creepy video by Chris to the CWCki. Subsequently, Chris did his part for autism awareness by making a video in which he mumbles through the Wikipedia page on autism whilst wearing his sports bra.

Near the end of the month things finally took a turn for the interesting on the CWCipedia. Several episodes of the Sonichu comic were deleted for their use of copyrighted characters, and some bold impostor sent Chris's Wikisysop a batch of new pages for Sonichu #11. These False and Dishonest pages attempted to end Sonichu for good, as they featured the deaths of many main characters and Sonichu and Rosechu's bitter divorce. Sadly, Chris noticed relatively quickly, and replaced all the troll pages with placeholder images.

Events of April 2010

 * 1 April - Chris, as if his threat were an April Fools joke, fails to act or tard rage against the CWCki.
 * 2 April - Chris remembers his threat, and vandalizes three templates. His edits are quickly reverted.
 * 4 April - 110mb gets its act together and the CWCipedia returns.
 * 4 April - Chris creates another OkCupid account, after abandoning his first attempt over a year earlier.
 * 5 April - Chris's The HooK Café personal ad is discovered, which blatantly broadcasts the fact that he's just after hanky-panky now.
 * 5 April - First of the Jackie E-Mails is sent.
 * 6 April - Chris asks Jackie if she has any STDs, after knowing her for one day.
 * 7 April - Chris sends e-mails to Jackie about the GAMe PLACe and his time at PVCC.
 * 8 April - Chris tells Jackie more about his history. Jackie tells him he should go to the Game Place and confront Michael Snyder.
 * 9 April - Chris's The HooK Café personal ad is deleted, along with a bunch of troll ads. He is likely attempting to hide the fact that he's picked up Jackie.
 * 9 April - Chris tells Jackie about Sonichu, Asperger's syndrome, and his OCD. He says he plans to visit the Game Place in a few days.
 * 10 April - Chris updates his blog and Captain's Log, breaking his exile from the internet to claim that pages are being drawn and that the ads will not phase him.
 * 10 April - Chris e-mails Jackie about his CADD degree, his singing voice, and his pets.
 * 11 April - Chris and Jackie share questionnaires, and they set up a date at Charlottesville Fashion Square.
 * 11 April - Chris visits The GAMe PLACe after Church. One of the cashiers recognizes him and threatens to call the police. Chris flees.
 * 12 April - Knowing that Michael Snyder is present, Chris revisits the The GAMe PLACe with his digital camera in his pocket and records his attempt to get himself unbanned. Michael says no and starts calling the police, causing Chris to flee again. Later that day, Chris releases the audio recording of the event, but it is quickly removed. He tells Jackie about the incident.
 * 12 April - The last Mailbag, Mailbag 62, is uploaded. It would stand unanswered.
 * 13 April - Chris posts a picture on the CWCipedia asking his fans to call Michael Snyder and ask him he wants to play Kick the Autistic. The same day, Chris tells Jackie he should have acted better while he was at the GAMe PLACe.
 * 14 April - Chris continues to undo CWCipedia vandalism, and writes biographies for the members of the Chaotic Combo.
 * 14 April - Chris tells Jackie he is not lazy, and that he will show her a good time on their date.
 * 15 April - Jackie tells Chris she wants him to make a video demonstrating his abilities at oral sex.
 * 16 April - Chris waits for Jackie at the Starbucks Kiosk at the mall. She doesn't show up, again shattering his heart level to 15%. However, Jackie tells Chris that he was the one who stood her up, and that she waited for an hour.
 * 17 April - Chris tries to reschedule the date with Jackie, and she pressures him to make an oral sex video.
 * 18 April - Chris sends Jackie a link to the CWCki, where she learns of how horribly Chris has treated his previous girlfriends. She demands for him to prove that he loves her.
 * 19 April - Chris creates a new "Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts" page, where he drops the Wallflower's real name again. Apparently traumatized by his failed CWCki "attack," he also creates a page titled "The Christian Truth," which linked to the revised ED page and the Gal-Pals page.
 * 19 April - Shortly after publishing the original page, Chris deletes Tiffany Robinson, Virginia Sanford, Natasha Turner, Sarah Anne Bevel, Molly Quarles, and Miranda Joyce Mitchell from his list of gal-pals. However, the Wallflower section remains unchanged.
 * 19 April - Chris sends Jackie the For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV video, a video that she has requested for the past few days in an attempt to show that he loves her.
 * 20 April - Chris makes a page dedicated to The Wallflower. Chris later blanks the page and changes the Wallflower's name to her pen name on the "Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts" page. Then, he recreates the page using her penname.
 * 20 April - Chris and Jackie argue over e-mails after Chris called Jackie "Ivy" in For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV. Chris responds by saying he does not want a relationship with her.
 * 21 April - Jackie harps on at Chris, and Chris says he realizes he never loved her.
 * 21 April - Jackie reveals herself to the public, leaking a disturbing video and all supporting documentation directly to the CWCki.
 * 22 April - Chris and Jackie have a heated exchange through e-mails. Jackie accuses Chris of wanting her only for sex and being more interested in video games than in her. Chris interprets her remarks as being accused of asexuality.
 * 23 April - Chris releases a video asking for understanding for autistic people whilst wearing nothing but a bra.
 * 23 April - Chris sends an angry e-mail to Jackie saying he can't help his autism. Jackie does not respond and does not renew her contact with Chris until 1 July 2010.
 * 24 April - The Sysop deletes a bunch of comic pages due to various forms of copyright infringement and, for reasons unknown, uploads Sonichu 11 in a version that appears to be not entirely True and Honest and updates the blog.
 * 26 April - Chris reverts the changes made by the Sysop and issues a stern warning on his blog. The reverted pages are replaced with Stress placeholders. He also makes his own OFFICIAL version of the autism awareness ad that better fits his views.
 * 28 April - Chris asks questions about ModNation Racers on the GameFAQs message boards.