May 2012 Facebook posts

This page covers Chris's activities on Facebook in May 2012.

Summary

 * 1 May - Chris claims to have fooled the trolls.
 * 5 May - Chris tells the trolls to leave Anna alone.
 * 8 May - Chris posts a new selfie and talks about his loneliness.
 * 9 May - Chris asks his friends to find him a girlfriend on Facebook.
 * 12 May - Chris blames Mimms for all his problems and demands the death of his girlfriend.
 * 13-14 May - Chris has new dogs.
 * 15 May - Chris believes the trolls are organizing a poster campaign against him.
 * 17-20 May - Chris continues to worry about the poster campaign.
 * 23 May - Chris is worried about the end of the world.
 * 24 May - Chris takes his mother to the hospital.
 * 26 May - Chris is still worrying about the posters.
 * 27 May - Chris wants his friends to help him find apps for autistic adults.
 * 28-31 May - Chris persists in worrying about the poster campaign.

New Photo
Anna wrote:

Chris:

Find me a girlfriend on Facebook
Kim responded:

Prehistoric butterflies
Anna commented:

Chris explained:

Kill His Girlfriend
Chris uploaded a photo of Mimms with the rant:

Kim nonchalantly queried:

Chris replied:

Anna cautioned:

So Chris awkwardly tried to reverse his steps:

Yet he couldn't help but persist in his death threats:

Kim asked:

Chris made as much of a concession as he was able:

And again:

Kim opined:

These poor fucking dogs
Note: Apparently Clover's name came from Chris mishearing the lyrics to "The Glow-Worm," recorded by Johnny Mercer and probably in Bob's collection: "Shine, little glow-worm, glimmer, glimmer."

The insidious poster campaign
For several weeks Chris had been building a large collection of screenshots from the CWCki Forums as evidence of troll wrongdoing. As a joke, forum members pretended to be involved in an elaborate plan to display flyers and posters around Charlottesville to let everyone know what an awful person Chris is. Naturally, Chris thought they were serious.

Anna, a true friend, suggested:

Chris shot this down:

Seamus Campbell wrote:

Chris suggested:

Seamus:

Chris:

Growing panic about the posters
Kim replied:

Chris:

He persisted in his anxiety:

Still concerned about the posters
Anna tried to reassure him:

Chris remained apprehensive:

Anna replied:

Chris does not listen
Anna:

Chris:

Copy/Paste
Kim:

Chris:

Hilton Inn
Chris saw a post by a forum member claiming to be staying at the Hilton Garden Inn in Charlottesville.

Anna responded:

Hey, Trollies
Feeling the need to brag again, Chris posted on Facebook taunting the trolls that he wouldn't say a word about what he was up to...and ends up confirming that he got banned from the mall like a dumbass, lost his virginity to a hooker and went to a Mythbusters tour, ironically divulging more about himself than anybody currently knew for the last few months.

Chris's "Hynamin" show is probably a reference to Jamie Hyneman; there was a MythBusters live show in Washington, D.C. on 24 March 2012, 100 miles (160 km) from Ruckersville. Several leaks later would confirm that Chris did attend the MythBusters tour, but he wasn't chosen to go up on stage.