Katie Bay E-mails

For a short period in July 2009, Chris, pretending to be Samantha Thaddeus, tried to work his magic on her friend Katie Bay. For a couple of days, they were honest friends until Chris forgot about her.

Sunday 19
Oh, I have like these two blank ones, this Chinese one, this English one or something, I believe Jack has the others.

why you ask?

-kate@undefined

I'll give them to ya when we meet up tonight for Mike's party. Dontcha worry bout it, k sam? I got it all here on this sticky note.

-kate@undefined

Yo Sam, you weren't at the party and your cell ain't working. I just left cuz you weren't there.

Is anything going on? You haven't replied...

-kate@undefined

Huh? You still listen to your dad? But he's all the way in Ohio!

- kate@undefined

awwwww, what made you have such a change of heart?

Well, since I couldn't contact you all day (you lost your cell again didn't you lol) I decided to take a trip to the mall to do some shopping. You shoulda been there, there was this awesome sale at Bath and Body Works.

omg, but there was this creep at the mall though. He kept trying to hit on me but I just told him off. God, who does that? He was kinda cute tho, I'll give him that.

Mike's party was no fun without you. I didn't know anyone at that party except for you but you didn't show. D:

So, how was your day?

-kate@undefined

Yeah that Chris sure is a dumbass lol.

Anyway, you seem pretty off today, anything the matter?

Your day was just "okay"? Man, you must have done some crazy stuff. Tell me about it!

-kate@undefined

Oh oh! I forgot to ask you the other day!

Like when we watched the entire Pitchmen marathon on Discovery, which invention is your favorite? I need to know because Jane said she thought Impact Gel was the best and she's totally wrong, right?

man, did you watch the billy mays tribute? holy shit sully made me cry so hard.

-kate@undefined

wtf breathing artificial plants? That was never on the show lol.

-kate@undefined

well whatever, the Impact Gel guy was an asshole. I liked the Dual Saw guy though, he was so hot.

omg, the chinese guy we met at the mall a week ago finally just messaged me back. I think I might want to go out with him.

do you think he's hot? seriously let me know.

-kate@undefined

yeah yeah, I'll get that right after I call him. Oh man, I hope it isn't too late. Well, it's only 11:20, he sure is a pussy if he sleeps in early! Heh, I'm sounding like you...

Wish me luck!

-kate@undefined

THAT MOTHER FUCKER CHRIS

GRRRR

I'm so angry, I fucked up that call. God damn it!

Okay, I call him right? And it just seems to go along fine right? He says something stupid and then he's like:

"Whoops, it was like I had autism or aspergers or something!"

And I couldn't stop laughing right? I kept thinking about Chris and shit and oh my god, I can't believe he somehow went into my head during this call. God damn it!

I'm killing myself over this Sam. God damn...it... ugh, he thinks i'm an asshole or something

-kate@undefined

DOES IT LOOK LIKE I GIVE A SHIT?

GRRRRR, WHY THE FUCK WOULD I WANT TO SURPRISE CHRIS? WHAT ARE YOU ON?!

WHAT BAD DUB WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT

YOU AREN'T HELPING TONIGHT SAM@undefined

Monday 20
of course, you sure love dodging me when i have troubles huh@undefined

well i feel better now. Eh, it wasn't really your fault. That stupid Chris guy. Whatever.

So, you feel like doing anything today Sam? I got nothin to do today.

-kate@undefined

don't worry about the password stuff, I have it safe somewhere in my papers. My little bro has been messin' with stuff in my room.

I took him out to lunch and we went to this one place that we've never been to. I forgot the name of the place, but the entire place is run by Taiwanese people. Like, they have broken english and it's so funny. They had some great Kung Pao chicken.

I was gonna take him out to dinner too, but he's off at his friends house for a sleepover or something.

So I'm just here cooking some dinner. Man, I haven't made mashed potatoes in forever. 5 more minutes til the boiling is done.

-kate@undefined

Tuesday 21
food was good, anyway

You wanna hang out today?

-kate@undefined

Wednesday 22
ah, I picked up my little bro from the sleepover and he said it was cool.

Well, you wanna hang out today? Evening maybe?

I slept in today, i feel like so lazy lol but it's summer!

-kate@undefined

well i figure you're still doing things around the house, but we can always do art tradeoffs again! YAY!

Okay, i'm starting off with Mew from Pokemon!

your turn!

-kate@undefined

Thursday 23
sam...you there?@undefined

what are you talking about?@undefined

Friday 24


I didn't know Sam did all this stuff. She told me about you and said that "he's some retard on the internet". I didn't know she did all this stuff.

I have a lot to think about.

-kate@undefined

I just want to know what Sam has been doing.

-kate@undefined