Jail Letter - 11 May 2022

On 10 May 2022, Chris sent a thirteenth letter from Central Virginia Regional Jail to Kenneth Engelhardt, his first since being returned to the jail from an undisclosed location on 3 May. Kenneth uploaded the letter to the Onion Farms on 14 May. This is the first known jail letter that Chris has written since he was returned to Central Virginia Regional Jail on 3 May. Despite being in a mental institution for over 2 months, Chris is just as crazy as he was before being transferred.

Most notably, Chris denies that he committed incest with Barb while also alleging that she had previously propositioned him for sex. He also sheds light on Barb's romantic history and reiterates his claims of being Jesus Christ.

Highlights

 * Chris says that he cannot disclose where he was during his two-month period away from jail.
 * Chris denies the veracity of the incest leaks from July 2021 and insists that his relationship with Barb was limited to "Soul Bonding".
 * Chris gives a biographical account of Barb's life, including details of incidents where she was emotionally manipulative.
 * Kenneth claims that Chris stated some "OMG" details, which resulted in him alerting his attorney.
 * Chris compares his own nonexistent relationships with trolls posing as women to his mother's real but dysfunctional relationships prior to meeting Bob.
 * Chris claims that Barb dated Tom Ashby in high school and that her sisters falsely accused her of being a slut, causing lasting enmity between them.
 * Chris denies that Barb ever had sex in high school, even though he previously claimed that she did.
 * Barb only married Bob because he owned a house, although there was "some genuine Love" in their relationship.
 * Barb allegedly offered herself for sex after learning about Chris losing his virginity to Mia Hamm.
 * Chris still believes that he's Jesus Christ.
 * Chris claims that Jacob Sockness cursed the country with the COVID-19 pandemic.
 * Chris describes World War III breaking out as a result of My Little Pony G5 not being canceled.
 * Chris warns Kenneth that now is not the time to be making a wiki page about any lolcow who does not already have one.