I Love You, Catherine

"I Love You, Catherine" is a video uploaded to YouTube by Chris on 4 October 2014. The video contains an apology to a trolling gal-pal named Catherine, the mystery sweetheart Chris had been posting about on Facebook for the past few months. Chris wears a skirt and stockings along with his old high school sweatshirt. A woman's headband can be seen in his ever-thinning hairline. It was filmed in the Rental House Chris and Barb had been staying in after the fire at 14 Branchland Court.

Chris appears to be at his lowest point since Chris Chan Update 21 October 2008 and CWC is Sad, speaking in a low monotone and at times coming close to tearing up. It is possible that Chris is showing actual remorse here, instead of his usual bullshit. That, or this is just him being sad over losing some china.

Note that the video has the classic murky green tint, skips in the audio, and him controlling the camera with his PS3 controller, so it appears that Chris used his PSEye again instead of the superior quality camera on his iPhone that he used in his other videos released around this time. The cinematography, combined with the old music and the somber tone, have drawn comparisons to the content of the album , which is about dementia.

Video
"I've royally screwed up here"

Transcript
["" playing in background]

[immediate jump cut]--is Christian Chandler, of Ruckersville, Virginia. I'm recording this vid-video because I have... apologies to make. I...want to apologize to, uh... Shaina, who was...a good friend of mine - but not my s- girlfriend - uh, been helping me- been helping me out in relaying details and whatnot amongst, uh, my... sweetheart, another one of my gal-pals, and uh, uh [does his stress sigh]... new... man of the hour. Anyway, um, alright, Shaina has been relaying messages on and off between me and, uh, uh... his name is Colin, and, uh, my sc-school gal-pal Rebecca who introduced me to Shayna in the first place. Anyway, I, uh, with my sweetheart, uh, everyone oughta know her by now who knows me, because they found the CD I gave her. Yeah, her name is Catherine. So, yeah, with that, uh, I would really appreciate having the CD sent back to me and I'll make sure she gets it 'cause it's the master copy, as well as the master print and handwriting in there, so I would really mu- appreciate getting that back.

Anyway, I've royally screwed up here, because, uh, while Catherine was in New York recently, for, uh, a bachelorette party of a friend of Shaina's, uh...[deep swallow followed by sigh] sh-...yeah, uh, Colin asked her and Shaina asked her to go out for a sailboat ride. Uh, Shaina couldn't make it but Catherine went. They had a good ti- they had a fun time on the boat. Nothing else happened. Colin treated her with respect, and I'm guessing kept his distance, but definitely respected my sweetheart, and uh... I made assumptions because I did not know better and I had other fears in my mind as well. I had, uh, assumed Colin was the type that would take advantage of other women, and, uh... most importantly, Cat- my Catherine, and I had assumed from what he told me that, uh, it was kind of, uh, lackadaisical, and insincere. Would not take, uh, would not listen to me very seriously.

Anyway, I beg to put it into a pun, I've made an ass of myself by making so many assumptions. Anyway, it all turned out very bad, especially for, uh... Catherine... and me. I've just been feeling really bad about that. Uh... I'm sorry, Shaina, for putting you through the in-between people-- work-- luh, I appreciate you doing that very much. And Colin, I'm very sorry for all the assumptions I made about you. I would like to think better of you as a person, and I... I trust you-- I am trusting you from the-- all that, yeah. And most importantly, I'm very sorry to my sweetheart Catherine. [Chris facepalms] I just... She's been going through a lot as well... she need- she needed a good time as well to get away from the bad things of life that's bothering her, but it's relevant to her father. That's all I'm gonna say about that.

Anyway, Catherine, you mean the world to me, sweetheart, you really do, and.. I mean to treat you as a partner, I do. And I don't mean to treat you as a child, uh... I've been going under a lot of my own stresses lately. [Begins to tear up a little] Especially in response to everything, and I... [Chris facepalms again] I miss my father every day... Sigh.. It all hurts. My heart and soul, they what to you, Catherine, they really-- I-I really do send my heart out so if you wanna keep it with you, keep my heart and soul as well. I love and I care about you so much and I respect you and I mean very well in my intentions. Always. Even if they aren't the best impulses out of all that. I'm very sorry for all the mistakes I've made. [Chris facepalms a third time, then starts his godawful singing.]

I can't stop loving you~

Deep within my heart~

I don't know all the lyrics~

So I'll just sing from the bottom of my heart~

And the depths of my soul~

[dramatic pause] I love you.