CWCki - User contributions [en]

Jail Letter - 3 October 2021

2025-06-27T02:11:47Z

Alan Pardew: Would be beneficial to link his KF posts too

[[File:PmurtRally.jpg|thumb|"Allah is a good God, yes, but even he has his imperfection, and concerns over his followers, and Nationality of Islam. He and I both know that Islam contains a total population that includes around 40% of Toxic Haters, Fakers, and Sinners within it. And the total Fallout and Conflicts within are certainly not too good."|375px]]
On 3 October 2021, Chris sent a letter from jail in response to a failed attempt to convert him to Islam.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/oct-3-2021-chris-writes-letter-rejecting-attempt-to-convert-him-to-islam.102849/ ([https://archive.ph/BjQOX archive])</ref>. Chris seems to be under the impression that Islam is a nation instead of a multi-ethnic religion spanning across the world; an idea [[brainwashed]] into Chris by the [[Idea Guys]] several years prior to writing this letter.
{{clear}}

==Background==
{{Incomplete}}
{{Infobox Person
|title = Michael Afghani
|name = Michael Bijan Afghani
|image = MichaelAfghani.png|size=270px
|day = 5
|month = 4
|year = 1999
|aliases = Coupon11 <ref>{{cite farms|thread = 102849|post = 10203624|writer = Coupon11}}</ref> 
Coupon12 
Coupon13 
kookoohead 
qqqqqqqqqqq 
Charm 
Anti-Idea Guy
|race = Middle Eastern
|gender = Male
|nationality = American (part-Persian)
|organization = The Lunar Module (founder, former leader)
|saga = {{saga|jail|cn}}
}}
{{quote|I think he will convert to Islam and turn his life around
maybe in 2022, 2025, 2030, only God knows.|Michael believing that Islam will turn Chris's life around.}}
'''Michael Bijan Afghani''', also known as '''Coupon11''' is a Muslim who led the '''CWC Islam Project''', a project led by a group of [[Discord]] users known as '''Lunar Module'''. The goal of the project was to convert Chris to Islam, due to the members belief that Islam would turn Chris's life around. Michael, who had found Chris through [[Chris Chan: A Comprehensive History]] believed this due to his own experiences, instantly dropping estrogen and stopping his incel beliefs upon converting. Michael dubbing Lunar Module the '[[Idea Guys|Anti Idea Guys]]', believing that the Idea Guys only fed Chris beliefs about 'false prophets'. Lunar Module operated in a server called '''Project CWCIslam''' on 13 [[August 2021]], where members wrote drafts for letters to possibly send Chris.

Michael eventually sent his letter to Chris, and while he got a reply, he failed completely in converting Chris to Islam.

==The Letter==
{{EnvelopeFront
| sender = Jesus Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu
| upperright = <s>FREE ISSUE</s> 
| address1 = c/o CVRJ 13021 James Madison Hwy
| county = Orange, VA
| zip = 22960-2807
| date = 07 Oct '21
| centerleft = [[File:JailLetter2NewCWCCross.jpeg|150px|center]]
| center = Coupon 11 and peoples of "Project CWC Islam" ███████2704
| lower = ✶I am Fully Enlightened and Awakened✶
}}
{{quotebox|Greetings, coupon11 and all, October 3, 2021
The last response I have received from thee was one that was most filled with bad vibes, yet I am not at all shaken. I tell you, once more, I Meditate a Lot, and I have connected with this and all Universes and Dimensions in this timeline, as well as the entire Multiverse, so I speak only greatest and ultimate Truths. Absolutely no [[List of Chris's Lies|lies]], illusions, [[Chris and reality|nor delusions at all]]. I genuinely know who and what I am deepest and fully. And not only am I the [[CPU Blue Heart|Goddess Blue Heart]] of the Commodore Consoles and the Nations of [[Cwcville]] and Old Comma, But I am also and mainly the Real Player One, the One Avatar, this Body is the One God Body, I am the full Reincarnation of none other than Jesus Christ of Nazareth, himself; [[Messiah complex|I am God]]. And my mom is [[Chris and religion#Concept of Emanuelle|Emanuel]], GOD above Gods (including Allah) herself. And I often speak and work with All.of the other Gods and Goddesses. Allah is a good God, yes, but even he has his imperfection, and concerns over his followers, and Nationality of Islam. He and I both know that Islam contains a total population that includes around 40% of Toxic Haters, Fakers, and Sinners within it. And the total Fallout and Conflicts within are...➞}}

{{quotebox|...certainly not too good.

Rather thou wishes to believe or not, between both the Dimension Merge (which is completed; All that remains of [[Dimensions#1218|Universe 1218]] is the failing Earth, Period. Universe 1C-211987, and its Earth, is where All of the Non-Toxic Majority shall be Collectively Shifted to, and are at present with these events. I bring, personally, the Second Coming; and at present, weare at Malachi 3 and 4 of the Old Testament, Literally.

I continue my hardest of work and efforts alongside and with Everyone between Both this Earth of 1218 and the Earth of 1C-211987. [[Meditation|Meditate]] Long, Deep, and Hard on that to confirm for yourselves. My body writes this with my telepathy, guiding its thoughts and hand with an ally Holy Flame soul maintaining it on my behalf.

Alongside Allah, I Can save most to ALL of you of this "Project" of yours, But you need to be Open for ALL GODS in order for me to do so. The choice is yours.

[Illustration of the Sonichu Cross.] Mrs. Jesus Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu, the Goddess Blue Heart and Lord of All.}}

==Original scans==
<center><gallery>
Image:Letter3Page3.jpg|Front of the envelope
Image:Letter3page2.jpg|Page 1
Image:Letter3Page1.jpg|Page 2
</gallery></center>

== See also ==
* [[Kiwi Farms posts (Coupon11)]]

==References==
<references/>

{{JailLetter}}

[[Category:Jail Letters]]

PlayStation Network

2025-05-20T03:46:14Z

Alan Pardew: /* Hacking */ Fix red link

{{Taxpayermoney}}
[[Image:Etc playstation.PNG|thumb|Confirmation e-mails, a testament to Chris's financial responsibility.]]

The '''PlayStation Network''' is an [[online]] digital media service introduced with the [[PS3]] with its launch in [[2006]]. It allows users to buy [[games]], movies, TV shows, and other stuff, as well as [[Template:Social media|social media]] features, music and movie streaming, and cloud gaming. Being [[Chris and money|as irresponsible with money]] as he is, [[Chris]] went into overdrive with this feature of the PS3's online capabilities. Chris spent so much on the PSN that it contributed most of his credit card debt at the time (roughly $3,500 circa early 2010).

You might ask yourself how he could've spent that much and what he could've spent it on. Chris seemingly bought (and still buys) everything possible, from game content to movies to several episodes of terrible harem [[anime]]. A list of Chris's PSN purchases reveals that he frequently bought DLC for games he doesn't even own.

Chris spent at least '''$6,127.64''' in American [[Monthly tugboat|taxpayer dollars]].

==Spending history==
The following table chronicles Chris's deposits into his PlayStation Network "wallet" between April 2007 and February 2010, the period for which detailed records of his transactions are available (thanks to the work of expert hackers).

Some interesting patterns can be spotted in his spending habits. He was relatively thrifty for most of 2007 and into early 2008 when he still had a few other outlets for entertaining himself outside of his [[Chris's room|room]]. There's a sharp spike around the time of his first ban from [[The GAMe PLACe]] in the spring of 2008, although that signal spike might have been augmented as a result of his concurrent "breakup" with Megan Schroeder in a bid to salve the emotional wound with the desperate application of virtual toys. Likewise, it's probably not a coincidence that after Chris was permanently booted from The PLACe in the summer of 2008, he began spending a shit ton more tugboat money on PSN.

In light of the second wave of the [[Vivian Gee E-mails, 2010|Vivian Gee e-mails]], Chris's spending in early 2010 is impressive. Despite being supposedly put on a strict budget by his father at the time (in order to pay down debts created by his earlier PSN spending), he still managed to spend around $100 or more a month.

{| class="wikitable"
|-
! '''Month
! '''Amount
! '''Month
! '''Amount
! '''Month
! '''Amount
! '''Month
! '''Amount
! '''Month
! '''Amount
|-
| February 2010
| '''$130.00
| July 2009
| '''$80.00
| December 2008
| '''$150.00
| May 2008
| '''$90.00
| October 2007
| '''$55.00
|-
| January 2010
| '''$90.00
| June 2009
| '''$170.00
| November 2008
| '''$110.00
| April 2008
| '''$16.02
| September 2007
| '''$35.00
|-
| December 2009
| '''$234.29
| May 2009
| '''$135.00
| October 2008
| '''$90.07
| March 2008
| '''$20.00
| August 2007
| '''$65.00
|-
| November 2009
| '''$215.00
| April 2009
| '''$225.00
| September 2008
| '''$90.00
| February 2008
| '''$20.00
| July 2007
| '''$25.00
|-
| October 2009
| '''$268.41
| March 2009
| '''$210.00
| August 2008
| '''$85.00
| January 2008
| '''$75.00
| June 2007
| '''$10.00
|-
| September 2009
| '''$132.36
| February 2009
| '''$125.00
| July 2008
| '''$120.00
| December 2007
| '''$25.00
| May 2007
| '''$35.00
|-
| August 2009
| '''$50.00
| January 2009
| '''$90.00
| June 2008
| '''$30.00
| November 2007
| '''$30.00
| April 2007
| '''$25.00
|}
[[File:Cwc spending.png|150px|thumb|right|A graph of his spending between April 07 and Feb 10. Source: [[CWC PSN Spending R script]] ]]

== Trophies ==
According to the [https://psnprofiles.com/Sonichu PSN profile for Sonichu], as of 28 [[September 2024], Chris has 5,050 trophies. ''Note: Availability of Sonichu's trophy information is dependent on the proper functioning of the PlayStation Network. Information is not updated in real time.''

Games with over 50% progress include:

{| class="wikitable sortable"
|-
!align="left"|Game
!align="left"|Trophies
!align="left"|Progress
!align="left"|Comments
|-
| ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]''
| 70
| 100%
| And he still can't coordinate his jumps, or design a good level.
|-
| ''[[ModNation Racers]]''
|[[Chris and Sex|69]]
|100%
|A driving game that Chris is terrible at. The levels that he has made so far are simply bad, and he racks up a fairly consistent .200 winning average.
|-
| ''[[LittleBigPlanet|LittleBigPlanet 2]]''
|65
|100%
|The game that made his [[Autism Tutorial]] possible.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Back to the Future: The Game|Back to the Future: The Game]]''
|60
|100%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale|PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale]]''
| 56
| 100%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:InFamous|inFamous]]''
| 50
| 100%
| A man dressed in yellow that shoots electricity? [[Sonichu (character)|Hmmmmm...]]
|-
| ''Sonic Generations''
| 50
| 100%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Skylanders Giants|Skylanders Giants]]''
| 46
| 100%
|
|-
| ''[[Kacey Call 8|Hannah Montana: The Movie]]''
|43
|100%
|[[Homos|No comment]].
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Skylanders:_Spyro's_Adventure|Skylanders Spyro's Adventure]]''
|38
|100%
|
|-
| ''Blue Toad Murder Files: The Mysteries of Little Riddle''
|37
|100%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Ratchet & Clank: A Crack in Time|Ratchet & Clank: A Crack in Time]]''
| 37
| 100%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:God of War: Ascension|God of War: Ascension]]''
| 36
| 100%
|
|-
| ''[[God of War]] III''
|36
|100%
| All that blood and gore couldn't stop Chris from grabbing all the trophies and deity boobies.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Sly Cooper#The Sly Collection|Sly Cooper and the Thievius Raccoonus]]''
|36
|100%
| Furries galore.
|-
| ''Sly 2: Band of Thieves''
|36
|100%
|
|-
| ''Sly 3: Honor Among Thieves''
|36
|100%
|
|-
| ''God of War II''
|35
|100%
| From the ''God of War Collection''.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Ratchet & Clank 2|Ratchet & Clank 2]]''
| 35
| 100%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Sonic's Ultimate Genesis Collection|Sonic's Ultimate Genesis Collection]]''
| 35
| 100%
| Another case of redundancy for most of the included games, especially the ''Sonic'' ones.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Ratchet & Clank 3: Up Your Arsenal|Ratchet & Clank 3: Up Your Arsenal]]
| 33
| 100%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Midway Arcade Origins|Midway Arcade Origins]]''
| 32
| 100%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Ratchet: Deadlocked|Ratchet: Deadlocked]]''
| 31
| 100%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Cuboid (video game)|Cuboid]]''
| 24
| 100%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Stacking (video game)|Stacking]]''
| 21
| 100%
|
|-
|''[[wikipedia:Costume Quest|Costume Quest]]''
| 17
| 100%
| Made by the same people who made ''[[wikipedia:Brütal Legend|Brütal Legend]]''.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Linger In Shadows|Linger In Shadows]]''
| 16
| 100%
| A demoscene production. Not remarkable. Most people already had 1,000 gamerscore in ''[[wikipedia:Second Reality|Second Reality]]''. In 1993.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Sonic Adventure|Sonic Adventure]]''
| 15
| 100%
|
|-
| ''SBCG4AP Episode 4: Dangeresque 3: The Criminal Projective''
| 15
| 100%
|
|-
| ''SBCG4AP Episode 3: Baddest of the Bands''
| 15
| 100%
|
|-
| ''SBCG4AP Episode 2: Strong Badia the Free''
| 15
| 100%
|
|-
| ''Sackboy's Prehistoric Moves''
| 14
| 100%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Strong Bad's Cool Game for Attractive People|SBCG4AP Episode 5: 8-Bit Is Enough]]''
| 14
| 100%
|
|-
| ''SBCG4AP Episode 1: Homestar Ruiner''
| 14
| 100%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Flower_(video_game)|Flower]]''
| 14
| 100%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Sam_%26_Max:_The_Devil%27s_Playhouse|Sam and Max: The Devil's Playhouse]] - Episode 1: The Penal Zone''
| 13
| 100%
|
|-
| [[PS Vita|''Welcome Park'']]
| 13
| 100%
| A Vita tutorial.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Wheel_of_Fortune_(video_game)|Wheel of Fortune]]''
| 13
| 100%
| Truly, the apex of hi-def gaming.
|-
| ''Back to the Future - Episode 1: It's About Time''
| 12
| 100%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Gunstar_Heroes|Gunstar Heroes]]''
| 12
| 100%
| Chris may have gotten 100% in ''Gunstar Heroes'', but in reality, he's a total zero.
|-
|''Sam and Max: The Devil's Playhouse - Episode 2: The Tomb of Sammun Mak''
| 12
| 100%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Sonic the Fighters|Sonic the Fighters]]''
|12
|100%
| A fairly short fighting game that can generally be beaten in under 12 minutes.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Sonic the Hedgehog 4: Episode I|Sonic the Hedgehog 4: Episode I]]''
| 12
| 100%
|
|-
| ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog]] 2''
| 12
| 100%
| [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|"...Christian's father says it only takes a few hours for him to master an electronic game and then...''move onto another!''"]]
|-
| ''Sonic the Hedgehog''
| 12
| 100%
| Of course.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Buzz!|Buzz!]] Junior: Monsters''
| 11
| 100%
|
|-
| ''Buzz! Junior: RoboJam''
| 11
| 100%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:NAMCO MUSEUM ESSENTIALS|NAMCO MUSEUM ESSENTIALS]]''
| 11
| 100%
|
|-
|''Sam and Max: The Devil's Playhouse - Episode 4: Beyond the Alley of the Dolls''
| 11
| 100%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:.detuned|.detuned]]''
| 10
| 100%
| Another demoscene production. Again, we'd allege that Chris wouldn't get too far in Farbrausch's more famous interactive entertainment prod ''.kkrieger'' - not to even mention the largely .famous ''.the .product'', dammit!
|-
| ''Sam and Max: The Devil's Playhouse - Episode 3: They Stole Max's Brain!''
| 10
| 100%
|
|-
| ''Sly Minigames''
| 8
| 100%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Mainichi Issho|Mainichi Issho]]''
| 7
| 100%
| A Japan-only release. Apparently just like ''[[Animal Crossing]]'', only more boring and even bigger of a grind fest.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Frogger_Returns|Frogger Returns]]''
| 4
| 100%
| ''100!!!''...oh, it's 4 trophies for 4 levels.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Skylanders SWAP Force|Skylanders SWAP Force]]''
| 40
| 94%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Burnout_Paradise|Burnout Paradise]]''
| 93
| 91%
| It has cars. They can be driven. Yes, this is a highly-acclaimed title, but Chris believes it's comparable to that of ''The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time''.<ref>''[[Brutal Legend Plus]]''</ref>
|-
| ''Sonic CD''
| 11
| 90%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Braid_(video_game)|Braid]]''
| 11
| 89%
| A game about a man who alters [[Time Void|time]] to rescue his [[sweetheart]]. However, it's worth noting that ''Braid'' is a puzzle game, and not a simple one to play either, yet he still fully completed the game. This is perhaps the most definite proof that Chris isn't mentally retarded (or, at least, he knows how to use GameFAQs).
|-
| ''Treasures of Montezuma Blitz''
| 13
| 85%
|
|-
|''[[wikipedia:Tetris|Tetris]]''
|9
|85%
|
|-
| ''[[LEGO]] [[wikipedia:The LEGO Movie Video Game|Movie - Videogame]]''
| 49
| 82%
|
|-
| ''God of War''
| 33
| 82%
| Most of the trophies are earned by progressing through the game normally. The trophies he lacks are the ones that require you to complete actual challenges or completing the game in under five hours.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Duke Nukem Forever|Duke Nukem Forever]]''
| 63
| 80%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Heavy_rain|Heavy Rain]]''
| 53
| 80%
|
|-
| ''God of War: Chains of Olympus''
| 32
| 80%
|
|-
| ''[[Wikipedia:Table Top Tanks|Table Top Tanks]]''
| 5
| 80%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Skylanders: Trap Team|Skylanders: Trap Team]]''
| 47
| 78%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Ratchet & Clank: All 4 One|Ratchet & Clank 4 One]]''
| 45
| 77%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Band Hero|Band Hero]]''
| 35
| 77%
| A pop music version of ''Guitar Hero''.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Rock Band Blitz|Rock Band Blitz]]''
| 18
| 76%
|
|-
| ''The Price is Right''
| 11
| 76%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Sonic_unleashed|Sonic Unleashed]]''
| 37
| 75%
| Due to the trophy data not visible to the public and people reporting hearsay as fact, a lot of people were under the assumption that Chris had 100% of the trophies in ''Sonic 2006'' (which doesn't even have trophies). Now, we're equally perplexed by the fact that Chris has ''only'' 75% of trophies in a bona-fide 3D ''Sonic'' title.
|-
| ''[[Brutal Legend Plus|Brütal Legend]]''
| 46
| 74%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Splatterhouse_(2010_video_game)|Splatterhouse]]''
| 43
| 72%
|
|-
| ''[[LittleBigPlanet|LittleBigPlanet 3]]''
| 38
| 71%
|
|-
| ''God of War: Ghost of Sparta''
| 31
| 71%
|
|-
|''[[LEGO]] Batman 2: DC Super Heroes''
| 27
| 71%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Penny_Arcade_Adventures|Penny Arcade Adventures]]: OtRSPoD, Episode One''
| 11
| 71%
|
|-
| ''Penny Arcade Adventures: OtRSPoD, Episode Two''
| 11
| 71%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Numblast|NUMBLAST]]''
| 10
| 71%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Papo & Yo|Papo & Yo]]''
| 10
| 71%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Noby_Noby_Boy|Noby Noby Boy]]''
| 9
| 71%
|
|-
|''[[wikipedia:Space Ace|Space Ace]]''
| 7
| 71%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Rock of the Dead|Rock of the Dead]]''
| 21
| 66%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:PlayStation Home|PlayStation Home]]''
| 13
| 66%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Sonic & SEGA All-Stars Racing|Sonic & SEGA All-Stars Racing]]''
| 36
| 62%
| ''Sonic Kart'' couldn't hold his interest long enough for a platinum trophy. No Sonichu? Back to ''ModNation''.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Tomb Raider (2013)|Tomb Raider]]''
| 51
| 61%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:UDraw_GameTablet#uDraw_Studio_Instant_Artist|uDraw Studio]] - Instant Artist''
| 28
| 61%
|
|-
| ''Buzz!: Quiz TV''
| 16
| 61%
| The first of the ''Buzz!'' games to appear on PS3. See also Chris's [[Quizzes]] for his MyBUZZ! stuff.
|-
| ''[[Wikipedia:Uncharted: Golden Abyss|Uncharted: Golden Abyss]]''
| 38
| 60%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:LittleBigPlanet Karting|LittleBigPlanet Karting]]''
| 45
| 58%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Spelunker HD|Spelunker HD]]''
| 31
| 58%
|
|-
| ''[[Emily_Date_Conversation_Transcript#Meet_the_Pickle_.2801:21:44_-_01:25:29.29|Watchmen: The End is Nigh]]''
| 8
| 57%
| "Meeting with Chris-chan left [[Semen|bad taste]] in mouth. He is [[Tugboat|pampered]] and [[Tomgirl|decadent]], [[Chris and hypocrisy|betraying]] even his shallow, liberal affections. Possibly [[homos]]exual? Must remember to [[Kick the Autistic|investigate further]]."
|-
| ''[[Transformers|Transformers: War for Cybertron]]''
| 34
| 55%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Rock Band|Rock Band: Classic Rock]]''
| 12
| 55%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:The House of the Dead 4|The House of the Dead 4]]''
| 15
| 52%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Pure Chess|Pure Chess]]''
| 10
| 52%
| 10 of 13 trophies? Oh wait, only three trophies require any real skill.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Uno_(video_game)|Uno]]''
| 10
| 52%
| Chris probably bought it in hopes that it was like the [[HEXBox|Xbox Live Arcade]] version. Forgotten about when he realized that was not the case.
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Uncharted: Drake's Fortune|Uncharted: Drake's Fortune]]''
| 26
| 50%
|
|-
| ''[[wikipedia:Sonic the Hedgehog 4: Episode II|Sonic the Hedgehog 4: Episode II]]''
| 8
| 50%
|
|}

Comparing to the [[List of Chris's games|list of games he owns]], there was a bunch of them that he hadn't even booted up a single time. There are some games he had touched maybe once and then left to the wayside; for example, all of his ''BioShock'' trophies are from the beginning of the game, and he received all of them on October 23, 2008, over a couple of hours. (The logical conclusion is that the second level of ''BioShock'' will ''blow your mind.'') In public, he also prominently featured games he never really played; the [[PS3 History Level]] shows many games that he touched only a few times (''[[Sonichu's Edge|Mirror's Edge]]'' and ''BioShock'', for example, currently sit at 11% and 9% respectively), and in [[PS3 Tutorial for my fans|the PS3 tutorial]], Chris says he thinks ''PAIN'' is a "fun" game, yet he let it sit at 0%.

==Hacking==
{{Main|Jack_Thaddeus#PSN_Hacking}}
As a result of his online notoriety, his poor choice of passwords, and his innate gullibility, Chris’s PlayStation Network account was hacked or otherwise wrested from his control on multiple occasions. [[BlueSpike]], in his guise as Chris’s sweetheart [[Julie]], was able to convince Chris to break the first fundamental rule of cybersecurity and "share" his password in [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|February 2009]], which was later used as a wedge to control and torment Chris. That summer, [[Jack Thaddeus]] seized the account, resulting in detailed revelations concerning Chris’s insane online spending habits, as well as the video with [[Chris humps his PS3|eight minutes of console humping]]. Chris managed to keep control of his accounts for a surprisingly long time after his run-in with Thaddeus, but his luck ran out on 24 [[February 2010]], thanks to [[Surfshack Tito (troll)|a certain Hawaiʻian]].

==Post-jail activity==
[[File:PSN profile change 12 August 2023crop.png|thumb|Chris's status from August 2023.]]
[[File:SonichuLeft.jpeg|thumb|Chris leaving a PS chat.]]
On 12 [[August 2023]], about four months after his [[Jail_Saga#Bonded_out_or_Released_by_court_order|release from jail]], Chris changed his PSN profile description from "I am Christine. <3" to "I'm Christ Chan Prime" to reflect the [[Messiah_complex#Jesus_Reborn|revelation]] he made while in [[Jail Saga|jail]].<ref>https://www.reddit.com/r/ChrisChanSonichu/comments/15pepax/chris_is_back_on_psn_he_has_updated_his_profile/</ref> If Chris is using "Prime" in the same way he used it when referring to [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] as "Sonichu Prime" (meaning the first and most important [[Sonichu (species)|Sonichu]]), then Chris is possibly [[Chris and his ego|referring to himself]] as the most important incarnation of Jesus Christ, which is {{w|Miracles of Jesus|debatable}}.

On the same day, a screenshot of Chris leaving a PlayStation chat was posted to [[r/ChrisChanSonichu]] by user lambda115.<ref>https://www.reddit.com/r/ChrisChanSonichu/comments/15pdesg/active_on_ps/</ref> With zero context or other potential messages being added with the screenshot, it was assumed that this was Chris saying that Sonichu (the character) had left, though the OP clarified that this was just Chris, whose username on PSN is "Sonichu", leaving the chat.<ref>https://www.reddit.com/r/ChrisChanSonichu/comments/15pdesg/comment/jvwz2sa/?context=8&depth=9</ref>
{{References}}

{{Articleofthenow}}
{{CWCWasHereSaga}}
{{The Internet}}

White-Knights

2025-05-13T01:41:28Z

Alan Pardew: /* Chris will not even read your message */ Linking to how trolls had control over his e-mails would be better here for evidence.

{{Protip|As good as your intentions may be, there is no conceivable way any old e-friend can reach Chris at this point and change him for the better. Certainly not by continuing to ass-pat and pamper him, which is precisely what fucked him up so badly in the first place; as this wiki evidences copiously.}}

{{quote|[Chris] blocked me too. We defend her, buy from her and encourage her. A truly repulsive person.|Former white knight [[David90637947]].<ref>https://twitter.com/David90637947/status/1154345242834812929</ref>}}

{{quote|White knights [during the [[Miscreants]] era] were subverted. Their messages blocked, deleted before Chris could see them. If they got through, trolls would leak their conversations with Chris and accuse the helper of being the culprit.|[[Marvin]], one of Chris's former trolls.<ref>[[Kiwi Farms posts (Marvin)#Subverted White Knights]]</ref>}}

[[Image:Jack's Knight as William Spicer.jpg|thumb|right|180px|Artist's impression.]]

'''White-Knighting''' is a term used to describe the act of going on [[the Internet]] to help or defend someone else against other people, out of [[CWC is Sad|pity or compassion]], or for ulterior motives. People who do this are often referred to as '''White-Knights'''. White knighting of [[Chris]] is especially prevalent because of the sheer volume of abuse he's taken ever since he found his [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page in [[2007]].

Thanks to events following from the Idea Guys, most white knights now fall into a sub-group referred to as '''Anti-Trolls''', those who try to ward other trolls and Tetrad members away from Chris to have him for themselves, rather than for noble purposes. These are not to be confused with the other sub-group of White Knights, counter-trolls, who primarily fight against trolls to protect Chris, rather to troll him themselves.

'''Counter-trolls''' are those who take Chris's side to spite his [[trolls]]. Some do this because trolling one gullible idiot is less satisfying than trolling trolls, who actually have the ability to understand what is going on. Others have decided that Chris has jumped the shark and are trying to make everyone else leave him alone to put a stop to an old meme, which is effectively gatekeeping.

In the broader internet trolling community, a wide range of people, from neutral observers to even his greatest trolls, are accused of being white knights. This is mostly due to Chris's "fans" discouraging [[Weening]], [[Enablers|Enabling]] and [[A-Logging]], acts which, to outside observers, could be misinterpreted as an attempt to reduce trolling. Many of these outside observers are also confused by the tendency of Chris's trolls, including his most [[Vivian Gee|prolific]] [[Clyde Cash|ones]], trying to get him to improve his life, as they don't know Chris well enough to know it's nigh impossible to get him to improve using the "soft touch". So when the label "white knight" gets thrown around, take it with a grain of salt.

A meta-topic within the broader Chris saga has been the merits of attempting to help Chris stop being a lolcow, and whether he is deserving of such assistance, or even beyond help. Opinion on the matter is somewhat divided on whether Chris is capable of improvement, although most agree that if Chris is going to improve, it will not be in any large part due to the efforts of third parties who only interact with him over the Internet.

Some believed that Chris was improving on his own, albeit slowly and in small increments, as seen in his gradual abandonment of his homophobia, which began with him declaring tolerance for lesbians, which he eventually extended to gay men. Others believed that Chris had not tangibly improved and that he has merely moved sideways, rather than forward. Chris showed signs of "improving" from mid-[[2015]], having found [[Impulse Gay Social Club|a new hangout]] where it seemed he was finally making friends and improving his social skills. Moreover, he finally found a way to cash in on his e-fame, delighted his fanbase by resuming the comics ''and'' made his dreams of a Sonichu media empire a reality, albeit probably on a much smaller scale than he once envisaged.

Since Chris's arrest for [[incest]] in [[2021]], many of his white knights abandoned him, and he is now at the mercy of [[A-logs]] and [[weens]].

==Motives==

===Pity/Remorse===
Following the release of Chris's first [[nudes]] and the [[Chris Chan Update 21 October 2008|video]] in which he reacted to the loss of his [[medallion]]s and [[Blanca]], many people, including trolls, felt sorry for him. They had not expected it to be possible for him to be trolled so hard or for him to appear so shattered.

===Empathy===
The internet is full of [[autistic]] people, manchildren, and self-absorbed morons. Many of them are right here, fascinated with Chris. All of them see something of themselves in him, whether it's his [[obesity]], his all-consuming need for female companionship, or his fervent belief that his homemade comics matter. A lot of white knights have made at least some of the mistakes Chris has made and have since wised up. They think they can help improve Chris by offering the benefit of their experience.

===Circumstances beyond Chris's control===
{{see also|Chris and manipulation}}

Chris fails to identify people, a possible sign of [[Facial blindness|prosopagnosia]]. [[BlueSpike|Julie and her brother Max]] used the same voice, and yet Chris couldn't recognize that they were the same person. [[LoveYouLongTime]] played numerous real-life characters, and yet Chris fell for every one of them. Pictures of different women were used to depict [[Blanca]], and yet Chris thought they were the same person. Chris believed that pictures of {{w|Megan Fox}} were of [[Vanessa Hudgens]].<ref>[[Vanessa AIM Chat 9|Vanessa AIM Chat IX]]</ref> In high school, Chris memorized his appearance in the mirror because he had trouble recognizing himself.<ref>[[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]] – [http://thedailypos.org/misc/sonichu/Issue%207/SchuComic8Page24.jpg "...I had to train my brain to visually remember what I looked like..."]</ref> Since he's never "updated" his self-image, this is a possible explanation regarding why he denies being overweight.

Chris's autism also means that he thinks, and sees the world, in simplistic, binary terms; he cannot easily "read between the lines" or detect sarcasm, or practically any kind of nuance or subtlety. He's interpreted ''[[Family Guy]]'' as actually being against homosexuality.<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate March 10th, 2009]]</ref> When two male acquaintances at [[the GAMe PLACe]] exchanged sarcastic homosexual remarks, Chris concluded that they were gay.<ref>[[Mimms and Lucas Q&A]] - "One day Mike was joking around with Tito and they exchanged sarcastic homosexual remarks, and from that tiny exchange, Chris extrapolated that they were gay."</ref> It is also thought that his decision to go [[tomgirl]] was at least partially due to him taking advice to "get in touch with his feminine side" literally.

===The trolls are even worse people than Chris===
Another frequently heard line of reasoning is that the trolls have gone way too far, and have demonstrated that they're even worse than Chris, or at least equally pathetic. For example, BlueSpike's [[Julie Reveals Herself|sadistic abuse]] of his control over Chris [[BlueSpike#Reaction|outraged even trolls]]. The same can be said for the [[Idea Guys]], who convinced Chris to do extremely degrading things, permanently damaged his way of thinking, and even tried ''extorting'' him. The less sophisticated bulk of the trolling was the work of [[A-Logs]] and [[weens]], who are frowned upon even by trolls, and rightfully so. And, of course, who ''really'' has no life here: Chris, or the people who [[CWCki|obsessively document and debate everything he does]]?

===Attention Whores===
Some of these white-knights, the aforementioned anti-trolls, desperately seek attention from the community that surrounds Chris, sometimes faking their protecting of Chris. A lot like [[enablers]], these people cannot contribute anything to society and therefore will never get a Wikipedia page of their own, so the CWCki or Geno's Documentary series is the next best alternative. White Knights with attention on their mind often pretend that they are protecting Chris for noble purposes, when in actuality are trying to gain confirmation from the community through morally questionable techniques.

==Arguments against white knighting==

{{Incomplete}}

Perhaps you feel like you have a good case in trying to befriend and help Chris. Maybe you feel like you have a solid plan that'd truly help break Chris out of his godlike delusions, and/or actually take steps in improving his life, all without any sort of ill intent whatsoever. However, no matter how good your intentions may be, you shouldn't even bother trying to do this, and there are many reasons why.

===Chris is beyond your ability to help at this point===
The trolls that allegedly wanted to teach Chris some unpleasant truths about life, along with previous White Knights who wanted to shield Chris from criticism while genuinely wanting to prepare him for the real world, have consistently come to the conclusion that Chris is simply incorrigible – nothing helpful that anyone says or does has actually stuck with Chris in a long-term capacity, while he is more than willing to pick up more harmful habits. Even [[Null]], the closest person who Chris had to a friend since the trolling began, and was the only advisor that Chris would actually listen to, came to the conclusion that Chris not only refuses to learn anything if it even slightly inconveniences him, but that he is actively malicious and will ignore you or betray your trust if it benefits him. Even medical professionals are believed to have a hard time helping Chris, particularly when considering that Chris was just as delusional after [[Chris and mental healthcare|three months of time]] in a [[Western State Hospital|psychiatric hospital]] as he was going in. While Chris is a victim of circumstance, he can only get help if he actually seeks it, and that feels like extremely wishful thinking at this point.

===White-Knighting Chris now takes on a completely different connotation===
An unfortunate shift in the character of Chris's Internet adversaries has developed in the [[Idea Guys]]' wake. Having caused Chris to believe himself [[Polyamorous marriage|married]] and a [[Chris and religion#Delusions of godhood|a goddess]], traditional methods of reaching to Chris, as pretending to be a [[boyfriend-free girl]], have become obsolete. And in recent times, there have been an overwhelming number of people who are confident that playing make-believe with Chris will either help him in the long run, or will turn them into trolling legends. Because of this newfound confidence built by playing make-believe with Chris, it has been abused several times, and likewise became the means of weeding them out, regardless of their intentions. White-Knighting as a whole has taken a much more negative connotation in the Chris Chan community than it ever has before.

===Protecting Chris from specific trolls does not automatically make you a "hero" in the Chris Chan saga===
It goes without saying, but just because you divert trolls away from Chris, doesn't exclude you from being a subject of critique, as you have involved yourself in the drama in the first place. No matter the intention, interacting with Chris has always been discouraged by the community surrounding him. Chris's story doesn't really have heroes in it, anyways – it can basically be described as a sad tale of villains, victims, victims who become villains, villains who become victims, and those who watch the whole sorry story play out.

===White-knighting Chris is not worth the stress===
In order to get close to Chris, white knights have to spend at least as much time and effort as trolls to keep up-to-date on his activities. Most have to lie and pretend to be a goddess of another dimension, or a random [[OC]], to even capture his attention. This, combined with Chris's habit of pushing away anyone who tries to connect with him, is enough to make any sane non-psychologist crash into slumber. A key example of this is the [[enabler]] [[MKRNightVee|MKR]], who frequently came into conflicts with [[Jacob Sockness]] and his other enabling ilk while trying to warn Chris of the danger of letting Sockness get close – though for narcissistic reasons, as to some extent MKR simply wanted to keep Chris to herself. Regardless of whether they're white knighting for their own gain, or out of some misguided effort to help Chris, white knights will find themselves experiencing unprecedented levels of [[stress]]; this is one of the reasons why many simply give up.

===Chris will not even read your message===
For a long period of time, [[Chris_and_manipulation#Blocking_help|trolls had control over his e-mails]]. Messages sent to him by white knights were often deleted before he could read them. Even back in the days of the [[Mailbag]], any emails submitted to it, if they even got published, would've been [[Mailbag 29|given one-word replies and ignored]].

===Being overly nice to Chris might have molded him badly and still does===

Tempting as it is to feel sympathetic for Chris (despite [[Affair With Mother|certain events]]), doing so would only benefit him for all the wrong reasons. Chris's youth wasn't one without acts of kindness from others, albeit mainly people who were [[Manchester High|well-meaning yet misguided]] at best or [[Barbara Chandler|flat-out spoiled him at worst]]. As a result of others generally opting to shield Chris from even the slightest negativity ([[Virginia Jeanine Sanford|with a few attempts at genuine advice going in one ear and out the other]]), he has grown accustomed to receiving, or expecting to receive, nothing but complete satisfaction with no strings attached from anyone who gives him the time of day.

Not only has it led to Chris's tendency to become hostile to anyone trying to show him the error of his ways (and of course doesn't give him everything he wants), but it has also allowed opportunities for [[enablers]] to entertain his bizarre delusions, only making him worse than he was before his online infamy. To make matters worse, it has even effectively created a paradox where benefitting Chris prevents him from getting what would ''actually'' benefit him (i.e. [[Chris and mental healthcare|therapeutic aid he needs but refuses]]), so even the best of intentions will ultimately yield no positive results whatsoever.

===Chris won't ever learn his lesson, no matter what you tell him===
Due in no small part to the fact that Chris had been mollycoddled by [[Borb|his parents]] from the very beginning and had his hand held through school by [[Manchester High Leaks|teachers who were sympathetic to a fault]], he is flat out resistant to any harsh truths pointing out his countless shortcomings and the objective fact that the general public by and large isn't going to absolve him of responsibility for his antics.

He ''will not'' take a moment to reflect on his actions (let alone use memories of these experiences to avoid repeating the same mistakes ever again) because he is thoroughly convinced that [[Kick the Autistic|he is a righteous victim of an unfair society that horribly mistreats autistics]], thus anyone who goes against his ideals (i.e. denies him what he feels entitled to have) is an irredeemable villain in his eyes. As such, he won't accept any words that don't match what he believes in and/or wants to hear, so even simply trying to be nice and reasoning with Chris won't convince him you're not a dang dirty troll.

Even ignoring the numerous altercations Chris got into during his [[Love Quest]] (resulting in portraying authorities doing their jobs as [[Jerkop|one-dimensional]] [[Mary Lee Walsh|villains]] for him and his league of OCs to triumph over) and the brutally honest tongue-lashing he's received in [[Father Call|many a]] [[The End For Real|phone call]], a particularly notable example of a white knight unable to make Chris wake up and smell the coffee was none other than [[Vivian Gee]]. [[Vivitheg's AIM chat|After '''three hours''' of trying to do just that]], she eventually gave up, understandably equating the experience with "fighting a wall".

Supposing that Chris ''does'' consider you to be trustworthy, that still doesn't necessarily mean he will benefit from your attempts to help him. A good example would be [[Rocky Shoemaker]], who he considered to be better than a much-needed therapist yet consistently failed to follow just about ''every'' word of advice she gave him, her best efforts to prevent trolling schemes notwithstanding. Going back even further, Chris fondly remembered [[Virginia Jeanine Sanford]] being his favorite middle school teacher, proclaiming her to be "the most influential person of (his) life"<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2017_Facebook_posts#Nostalgic_for_middle_school_teacher</ref> who taught him "better social skills", how to deal with bullies and so forth<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Gal-Pals_and_Past_Sweethearts_(CWCipedia_page)</ref>. He even kept her parting message advising him how to avoid showing others his "weak points" and yet, judging by the fact that '''[[CWCki|this mere wiki]]''' exists, he obviously never took such words to heart.

In short, as long as your words are not 100% in line with his childlike and egocentric point of view, it's utterly futile to try and help Chris.

==Examples==
{{main|White knight emails}}

===YouTube===
Among the most notable of Chris's white knights was a [[YouTube]] counter-troll who claimed to be a 21 year-old Russian model named Svenka. Via her YouTube account, [http://www.youtube.com/user/hottiee96 hottiee96], she released an inordinate number of screencaps from troll conversations on [[Sonichu IRC]], including private conversations between Chris and Panda. She also released an image of the [[Man in the Pickle Suit]] who would later steal Chris's first date, [[Emily]]. Were Chris less thick-skulled and even slightly willing to accept irrefutable evidence, Svenka may have made somewhat of a negative impact on the organized trolling effort against Chris, but ultimately she was ineffectual. Svenka also had a unhealthy obsession with the [[CWCville Library]]'s original curator, Arjen Van Dierten.

On 6 [[May 2009]], YouTube user xThexPinchx/NorthxStar7/ThePinchisDaBomb tried to blackmail major trolls, claiming to have information on them. He was easily called on his bluff by someone who had not trolled Chris at all.<ref>[http://www.youtube.com/user/softerthanhardware YouTube]</ref> The Pinch has also threatened [[BlueSpike]] saying he has information from his friends, forgetting the fact that BlueSpike ''has no friends''.

===Facebook===
In recent times (since 2012), Chris has taken to using Facebook as his main means of expressing himself. Inevitably, this has not only attracted the attention of trolls, but, in 2013, a slew of White Knights as well, in particular, a [[William Elliott Waterman]], who taunted the trolls to come after him instead of Chris ('''Spoiler:''' Nobody did, because nobody actually cared what he had to say). Anna and [[Kim]] are two of the most notable ones on his friends list, both of whom try to offer constructive advice whenever Chris nosedives into a rant...when they're not busy kissing his ass, especially in the case of Anna.

However, as we've come to expect of Chris, anybody who tells him something he doesn't want to hear are people that needed to be brushed off until they stop saying those mean, awful things to him. A good case in point is his [[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Chris_Expresses_His_Outrage_for_Walmart|anger-laced tirade in September 2013, when he got thrown out of Walmart and started calling names]]. The white knights typically chimed in with their support...''until'' he revealed that he [[Chris and the law|vandalized]] an Xbox One display in the store. Several of them then told Chris that this was not right of him to do, and that the manager had every right to throw him out. His response to that?

{{quote|They do not.
And if they do, they are most in the wrong, [[Chris and reality|because they are most abusive and overzealous of their "authoritative power" that never has existed ever]].|– Chris's response to Chris Rhodes}}

===TV Tropes===
The TV Tropes [http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Webcomic/Sonichu article on ''Sonichu''] used to have a white knight message as the first text of the article, with a link back to this very page. It was eventually removed due to TV Tropes' website policy changing later on – in other words, said message would no longer be allowed on the website. The message is reproduced below:

{{quote|Hey Chris! If you're reading this: you seriously need to get help from [[Chris and mental healthcare|licensed professionals]], [[October 28 2011|before]] [[26 December 2014|the stuff]] [[Chris and sex#Incest|you do]] [[Jail Saga|gets you thrown in prison or forcibly committed]]. And we're sorry, but you have no real fans – [[True and Loyal Fanbase|the people you think are your fans]] are really either [[trolls]] or laughing at you behind your back. Every. Last. One. Please listen to us – for once.|– Concerned tropers.}}

Unfortunately, the editor in question fails to realize that their message, while well intentioned, will do absolutely nothing and Chris will simply ignore it even if he does [[Mailbag 52|fully read and input it for better development. Thank you for your time.]]

In another move that was appeared to be White Knight-ish to onlookers, the page was also locked in order to prevent [[Weening|Weens]] and [[A-Logging|A-Logs]] from derailing a page about [[Sonichu (comic)|Chris's stupid webcomic]] to instead flood it with a trope list covering his entire life, with entries on Chris and the effort to troll him taking up about two-thirds of the page as a result of overzealous editors piling on an easy target instead of talking about the comic itself. However, the mods took action not out of a desire to protect Chris, but because troping a creator in such a fashion was strictly prohibited, and [[CWCki|going into Chris's life in such detail]] constituted an [[Honest Content|invasion of privacy]] that was in direct violation of the site's rules. The subsequent cleanup led to several ''Sonichu''-related pages being locked, with the main page covering the work getting a milquetoast and somewhat insincere message explaining that the article was being locked over excessive negativity, rather than the page flagrantly being warped by its editors to serve a different purpose than what the site was actually made for.

Some ''Sonichu'' pages were eventually unlocked and the message was eventually removed, with the goal of actually providing examples of tropes in ''Sonichu'' being realized. However, following the [[Affair with Mother|incest]] reveal, the pages were locked once more, and all discussion of Chris's personal life was prohibited on the threat of suspension.<ref>https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/posts.php?discussion=13327578050A72722200&page=269#comment-6710</ref> The site even toyed around the possibility of removing all of the ''Sonichu'' articles and forum threads, but ultimately chose to (begrudgingly) keep them up.

A recreation of what that page looked like before being overhauled by the mods of TV Tropes can be seen [[User:Canine/TV_Tropes|here]].

==Chris as a White Knight==
In 2017, Chris himself began (attempting) to white knight the crew of [[Planet Dolan]], particularly [[DoopieDoOver]], after he misinterpreted one of Doopie's tweets about being tired of harassment from Chris himself as referring to [[trolls]] harassing her. To this end, he started the #[[HarassCWCdirectly]] campaign in which he exhorted the supposed trolls to take aim at him and leave Doopie and friends alone. This might well have been a misguided effort to [[Love Quest|win Doopie's affections]] after she emphasized that she considers him nothing more than a customer, not even a [[Gal pal|friend]]. Eventually, this campaign, combined with his overfamiliar behavior towards her, would earn Chris a block from Doopie later that year.

He also bizarrely white knighted ''himself'' in [[May 2020]] while [[Spirit possession|LARPing]] as [[Pokémon#Mewtwo|Mewtwo]], [[Polyamorous marriage|his second husband]].<ref>[[May 2020 social media posts#Anti-Protoman sperging]]</ref> Note that he did so as a brief interruption of his marathon session of LARPing as [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]].

==See also==
* [[A-Logging]]
* [[Enablers]]
* [[Weening]]
* [[White knight E-mails]]
* [[Jacob Sockness]] – An infamous white knight of Chris' that claims he wants to get in his pants.

==References==
<references />

==External links==
* [https://encyclopediadramatica.online/index.php/White_Knighting White Knighting] article at [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]].

{{Unholy}}
{{Articleofthenow}}

[[Category:People]]
[[Category:Trolling]]

Saberspark

2025-05-13T01:34:18Z

Alan Pardew: Added reference to Saberspark's recent video

{{quote|You watch Scott Pilgrim Takes Off because you're a fan of the original comic and movie
I watch it because Chris Chan expects it of me

We are not the same|Saberspark in a November 20, 2023 tweet<ref>[[November 2023 social media posts#Reply to Saberspark]]</ref>}}

{{Infobox Person
|image = Saberspark.png
|size = 250
|name = Saberspark
|gender = Male
|day = 11
|month = 10
|year = 1988
|race = White
|nationality = [[American]]
}}

'''Stephen Carver''', known by the username '''Saberspark''' (born 11 October 1988), is an [[American]] YouTuber who lives in [[Virginia]] and makes videos critiquing and discussing animation. Chris is a fan of his channel, knowing about him since at least [[September 2017]],<ref>[[September 2017 tweets#Gee Wiz!]]</ref> and still watching his content as of [[March 2025]].<ref>[[March 2025 social media posts#Brainrot]]</ref> [[CosmicKeyframe]] has also occasionally done video editing work for Saberspark.

On 1 [[September 2017]], Chris replied to Saberspark on [[Twitter]] saying he [[Chris and art|stays with traditional art rather than digital]].

On 29 [[July 2020]], Chris replied to Saberspark on Twitter, agreeing with him cutting ties with a YouTuber after they were exposed in a grooming scandal.<ref>[[July 2020 social media posts#Pedoforkia]]</ref>

On 16 [[October 2020]], Chris, while roleplaying as Sonichu, discussed Saberspark and his videos at [[The Place]], saying he has binged a number of his review videos, and said Saberspark is "a real good and funny card."<ref>[[The Place chats (October 2020)#Saberspark, Animation, The Golden Girls & Betty White, Sleep Schedules]]</ref>

On 24 [[November 2020]], Chris asked Saberspark over Twitter if he has a favorite retort line from the cartoon character {{w|Pinky and the Brain#Pinky|Pinky}}.<ref>[[November 2020 social media posts#Saberspark]]</ref>

On 7 [[March 2021]], Chris told Saberspark over Twitter that he is glad to not be a premium subscriber to Disney Plus.<ref>[[March 2021 social media posts#Raya]]</ref>

On 18 [[November 2023]], Chris gave his thoughts on Twitter about Scott Pilgrim Takes Off, mentioning that he is looking forward to Saberspark's thoughts and review on it.<ref>[[November 2023 social media posts#Scott Pilgrim Takes Off]]</ref> Two days later, Saberspark tweeted that he was watching it because "Chris Chan expects it of [him]." Chris replied to the tweet the next day saying he just foreknew he would watch it because it was highly likely.<ref>[[November 2023 social media posts#Reply to Saberspark]]</ref>

On 17 [[January 2025]], Chris posted to [[Bluesky]], saying he agreed with Saberspark's recent video about AI content farms, and used some basic talking points against AI.<ref>[[January 2025 social media posts#Thoughts on Artificial Intelligence]]</ref>

On 28 [[March 2025]], Chris posted to [[Bluesky]], saying he agreed with Saberspark's video about a "brainrot problem" on [[YouTube]].<ref>[[March 2025 social media posts#Brainrot]]</ref> In a livestream the next day, Chris read a subscribers' name, "Skibidicel", prompting him to mention Saberspark's video again.<ref>[[Jesus Christ Chan - Sonic 2006 Speed Playthrough]]</ref> Chris also mentioned brainrot a few other times during the stream.

On 1 [[May 2025]], Chris posted a video by [[ILoveKimPossibleAlot]] titled "What RUINED Saberspark and DAGames" to [[Bluesky]], writing that "#Saberspark is not so Sabersmart."<ref>[[May 2025 social media posts#What RUINED Saberspark and DAGames]]</ref> He also later gave his opinion on the subject, saying that fans and celebrities should not casually date each other. On 12 May, Saberspark posted a YouTube video denying the sexual assault allegations<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HNPvr0d5GhY</ref>, but it is unknown if Chris is aware.

{{References}}
{{People}}
[[Category:People]]
[[Category:Millennial Generation]]

Brony celebrities

2025-05-13T01:32:02Z

Alan Pardew: /* ILoveKPALot */ Added part about Saberspark on KP

'''Brony celebrities''' are notable fan creators involved with the ''[[My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic]]'' [[brony]] fandom.

Chris has sought to interact with several of them, [[TF2 Analysis|usually unsuccessfully]], although at least one sought him out and asked him to be part of [[MLP Animation: Discord Meets the Princess Bride|her fan project]].

==Tf2 Analysis==
===CosmicKeyframe===
[[File:CosmicKeyframe block.png|thumb|200px|CosmicKeyframe blocks Chris]]
On 11 [[January 2024]], CosmicKeyframe blocked Chris's CPU_CWCSonichu [[Twitter]] account. She had posted a poll asking her followers which pin design to make, and one had replied asking for a character from the [[G5]] series of ''My Little Pony''. Chris then angrily replied, claiming that G5 does not exist and demanding a [[G4]] pin instead. CosmicKeyframe then blocked Chris, mentioning that she did not want to deal with the drama.<ref>[[January 2024 social media posts#CosmicKeyframe's poll]]</ref>

===DRWolf===
{{main|DRWolf}}
Chris is a fan of DRWolf's content and has appropriated his ponysona several times, including in comic pages and a video.

===Jasper Pie===
Jasper has Chris blocked on [[Twitter]]. When asked the reason for the block by [[Tinyhorse1942]] (a Twitter alt suspected to be used by Chris), Jasper replied, "I found her behavior to be inappropriate, she made me feel very uncomfortable at a convention where she [[Creepy stare|stared]] at me and tried to follow me, and I really just didn't want to get involved in the drama."

Notably, TinyHorse was highly defensive and retorted that Chris might've merely been a fan who had a [[Facial blindness|tough time recognizing]] Jasper.<ref>[[Tinyhorse1942#Block Arguing]]</ref>

===ILoveKPALot===
[[File:Ilovekpalot.jpg|thumb|200px|ILoveKPALot]]
'''ILoveKPALot''', also known as '''KP''', is a YouTuber known for making videos discussing animated media and having produced ''[[MLP Animation: Discord Meets the Princess Bride]]'', a fan animation in which Chris was a contributor.

On 1 [[May 2025]], Chris posted her video titled "What RUINED [[Saberspark]] and DAGames" on [[Bluesky]], writing that "#Saberspark is not so Sabersmart."<ref>[[May 2025 social media posts#What RUINED Saberspark and DAGames]]</ref> He also later gave his opinion on the subject, saying that fans and celebrities should not casually date each other.

<center><gallery>
File:Night Star and ILoveKPaLot.jpg|Chris's art of [[Night Star]] meeting ILoveKPALot's ponysona
File:VariousBronyConArt3.jpg|Chris's art of ILoveKPALot and [[Discord]]
</gallery></center>

===Lightning Bliss===
{{incomplete}}
[[File:Sonichu Prime & Rosey Rosechu Prime meet Lightning Bliss- Chaos Crystal Control Act 4 Art Series.jpg|thumb|200px|Sonichu and Rosechu meet Lighting Bliss]]

In the [[Chaos Crystal Control]] comic which was partially released [[October 2023]], Chris appropriated Lightning Bliss's ponysona. In the story, Lightning Bliss is sent back in time to [[2006]] and is distraught over it. [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] encounter the crying Lighting Bliss and offer help.
{{clear}}

On 27 [[January 2025]], Chris made a post on [[Bluesky]], giving his thoughts on Lightning Bliss' recent Christmas video. He said it "resonated" with him, then mysteriously mentioned how he didn't want to say more due to wanting to keep "personal details" off the Internet.<ref>[[January 2025 social media posts#Lightning Bliss Christmas Special]]</ref>

On 28 [[March 2025]], Chris made a post on [[Bluesky]], praising Lightning Bliss' recent music video.<ref>[[March 2025 social media posts#Lightning Bliss]]</ref>

==Black Gryph0n==
[[File:VariousBronyConArt6.jpg|thumb|200px|[[Chris Chan Sonichu]] giving Black Gryph0n a fist bump]]
'''Gabriel C. Brown''', aka '''Black Gryph0n''', is a musician in the brony fandom. Chris drew Black Gryph0n's ponysona in the [[BronyCon 2018 gift comics]]. Chris subscribed to his [[Patreon]] in [[September 2019]] until being banned from the platform for his [[Affair with Mother]] scandal in [[August 2021]].
{{clear}}

==Nowacking==
{{main|Nowacking}}

{{References}}
{{MLP}}
{{People}}
[[Category:People who have blocked Chris]]

Emmanuelle

2025-05-13T01:25:47Z

Alan Pardew: /* Early Beliefs */ Minor grammar fix

{{Infobox Person
|title = Emmanuelle
|name = Emmanuelle
|image = EmmanuelleSonichu.png|imagesize= 200
|birthsrc =
|aliases = God 
Yahweh 
Emanuel
|gender = {{Gender|gender=female}}
|race =
|knownfor =
|nationality =
|occupation =
|saga =
}}

{{quote|Oh, for Goddess', Emanuelle's, Sake!|Chris<ref name=goddess>[[August 2016 Facebook posts#Goddess Emanuelle]]</ref>}}

'''Emmanuelle''' <ref group = note>Chris is very inconsistent with the spelling of their name, as [[Chris and English#Spelling|to be expected]]. Some spellings of the name include "Emanuel" and "Emanuelle". For the sake of consistency, the CWCki uses the spelling "{{w|Emmanuelle (name)|Emmanuelle}}", the formal way to spell the name.</ref> is what Chris believes to be the true name of the Hebrew God Yahweh, believing Yahweh to be a woman. According to Chris, Emmanuelle is the god above all other gods, being responsible for the managing of the multiverse. Chris also claims that Emmanuelle is his "godly mother", while [[Barb]] is his "earthly mother".

==Naming==
Before referring to God as "Emmanuelle", Chris often times referred to them and [[Jesus Christ]] collectively as one entity, referring to them as "GodJesus".

The exact origins of Chris calling God "Emmanuelle" of all things are unknown, but it can be assumed that this comes from the fact that it derives from how the name, which if of French and Hebrew origin, stems from the name "Immanuel", which translates to "God is with us".<ref>{{w|Immanuel (name)}}</ref> The first time that Chris referred to God as "Emmanuelle" appears to go as far back into [[2016]] in a [[Facebook]] Post. Said Facebook post has Chris criticizing Lizzy the Lezzy for a comic they made about a [[gay]] cure. Unsurprisingly, even Lizzy was confused on what the fuck Chris was talking about, replying with "Who the fuck is Emanuelle".<ref name = goddess/>

==Early Beliefs==

[[Image:CWCletter.jpg|thumb|left|Chris invokes God and Jesus, saying they told him that [[Blanca Weiss|Blanca]] is real. Proof that God and Jesus are on the [[trolls]]' side.]]
[[Image:SchuComic10P09.jpg|thumb|right|God and Jesus ('sup?) tell Chris he is meant to be with [[Ivy]].]]

Traditionally, Chris had a fundamental belief in an omnipotent, benevolent male God. He also accepted Jesus Christ as the son of God and the savior of mankind. He was reluctant to mention God without also including Jesus, perhaps out of some sense that he must stress his specifically Christian notion of God (despite other Abrahamic sects using completely different words for Him). In effect, Chris frequently referred to "God and Jesus" (or "GodJesus"<ref>[[Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions]]</ref><ref>[[CWC Update 9 April 2009]]</ref>) as if they were some sort of {{w|Binitarianism|Binity}}, a deviation from the mainstream Christian concept of the {{w|Trinity}} ("The Father, The Son, and the Holy Spirit") that his churches would regard as heretical.

Chris believes God has a special interest in his own life, which would be consistent with Western monotheism - except Chris seemed to view God as more of an instrument of his own will than a supreme being to Whom he is subject. In Chris's view of God, the Almighty will overlook his misdeeds, but will punish any who malign Chris. Case in point, the ''fact'' that Chris cheated in the [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|''PaRappa the Rapper'' contest]] is not nearly as important as the ''suspicion'' that [[Adam Stackhouse]] did, and Chris invoked God numerous times in his threats to Adam. Adam is no exception - Chris has been commonly observed invoking the wrath of God in his [[Death threats|infantile threats]]. Along with punishing all trolls, Chris expects God to hand him a sweetheart on a silver platter<ref>[[Vanessa AIM Chat 3]] message at 2:22:22 AM</ref> but is oblivious to the fact that God has yet to back him up on any prayers.

Much like {{w|Ruhollah Khomeini|Ayatollah Khomeini}}, Chris attributes most of his impetus to commands given to him directly from GodJesus in [[Dreams|visions]]. “I'd say my spirit is active while I am awake, but it does more when I am at rest or sleeping,” he wrote in 2014.<ref name=lvlup>[[List of OkCupid Answers#2014 Answers--LevelUpKing]]</ref> His exact beliefs concerning these prophetic dreams are difficult to pin down, but the most rational interpretation is that Chris dreams about something he'd like to do, then wakes up and decides it was God telling him to do it. In Chris's mind, each vision is simultaneously a directive to do something and proof that it will happen no matter what occurs. For instance, after Chris had a vision about fathering a [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|daughter]], he decided he was required to actively [[Love Quest|make that happen]] while also assuring himself that [[Virgin with rage|failure]] was impossible. When Chris was being accused of [[Chris and race|racism]] for insisting that he can only date white women, he justified this by arguing that his prophesied daughter must be white.

Visions from God supposedly confirmed that [[Blanca Weiss]], then [[PandaHalo]] and finally [[Ivy]] were to be the mother of [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Chris's child]], despite the fact that each of these women subsequently turned out to be [[trolls]]. This proves that God, if He exists, is either not responsible for Chris's supposedly prophetic dreams, or is [[Kick the Autistic|having a laugh at his expense]], an idea which Chris may have later taken to heart.

==Later Beliefs==
After prolonged exposure to the [[Idea Guys]] on 18 [[December 2017]],<ref>[[Idea Guy Q&A#Chris abandons Christianity for Neptunia]]</ref> Chris abandoned his earlier Christian faith in favor of worshipping the [[CPU Goddesses]] from the [[Hyperdimension Neptunia]] series. As his delusions deepened, he came to believe that he himself was the goddess [[CPU Blue Heart]], destined to trigger the apocalypse and usher in a [[Dimensional_Merge|new heavenly world]]. He later declared that God is a woman, influenced by his belief that [[Chris_and_gender|women are inherently good while men are evil]]. During his incarceration, after reading the Bible again, he adopted the conviction that he is the reincarnation of [[Jesus Christ]], merging this belief into his own personal religion [[Neo Spiritual Christianity]].

==Gallery==

<center><gallery>
File:SchuComic10P09.jpg|Emmanuelle in [[Sonichu 9]].
File:EmanuelOC.jpg|What Emmanuelle used to look like.
File:Christ chan and god emmanuel at the universe core by nightstarrosechu2891 dg6octc-pre.jpg
</gallery></center>

==See Also==
*[[Chris and religion]]
*[[Jesus Christ]]
*[[Messiah complex]]

{{Notes}}
{{References}}
{{Sonichu}}

Ultra Sonichu

2025-05-12T10:44:01Z

Alan Pardew: I'm so slow-in-the-mind about this sentence structure.

[[Image:219-UltraSchuPose.jpg|thumb|Ultra Sonichu, aka Down's Syndrome Sonichu]]

{{quote|After absorbing the power of the 7 [[Sonic the Hedgehog (series)#Chaos Emeralds|Chaos Emeralds]], [[Sonichu]] transforms into his Super-Form where he is invincible beyond compare. He can fly sky-high and has the most powerful Lightining Attacks.|[[:Image:215-ACUltSchuBck.jpg|Ultra Sonichu ''Animal Crossing'' card]]}}

'''Ultra Sonichu''' is the final form of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] that Chris has hyped before the comic even began. After years of promises, he finally appeared in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]].

Another of Chris's blatant rip-offs, it is a copy of [[Sonic the Hedgehog|"Super Sonic"]]. Super Sonic is the result of Sonic collecting all seven [[Chaos Emeralds]], which itself is inspired by the Super Saiyan transformation from ''[[Dragon Ball Z]]''. It should also be noted that Ultra Sonichu is basically a recolor of Chris's very first failure [[Bionic the Hedgehog]].

==Powers==
''Sonichu'' #10 has shown that Ultra Sonichu has a plethora of super powers. Besides being able to fly, like Super Sonic, he also has Messianic powers as well. He is shown using his presence to revive [[Zelina Rosechu]] from her eternal slumber (and apparently to accidentally free [[Clawdorf]] in the process), and he uses a power called "Chaotic Remedy" to cure Asperchu and his versions of Sonichu and friends from all their maladies, such as personality.

There doesn't seem to be any specific time limit on Sonichu's ability to remain in his Ultra form, unlike Sonic's Super form, where his only weakness is the fact that his form eventually runs out. After doing everything he needed to do (which included curing every single [[Jerkop]] he and his friends haven't managed to murder of their brainwashing) Sonichu just kind of... stops being Ultra.

In [[Sonichu_11#Episode_24,_Part_1:_"The_Clip_Show:_Catching_Up"|Sonichu 11]] however, it seems the ability lasts for a very short time that even Sonichu himself remarked that he gave up on his Ultra form a few hours ago.

==Evolution confusion==
Ultra Sonichu evolves from Sonichu. [[Metonic]] also evolves from Sonichu. It has already been shown in the comic that Sonichu will eventually evolve into Metonic, so technically Sonichu will never be able to evolve into Ultra Sonichu... but [[Sonichu 10|he found a way.]] He seems to be a Mega Evolution now, as seen in Sonichu 11 where he mega evolves into Ultra Sonichu via a [[Sonichite]].

==Star sign confusion==
After evolution, Ultra Sonichu's star sign changes from [[Wikipedia:Pisces_(Astrology)|Pisces]] to [[Wikipedia:Aries_(Astrology)|Aries]]. How this is possible is still a mystery. A theory is that [[Blake]] is the one to actually assume this form, since he is an Aries, much like Ultra Sonichu, and is supposed to have all the abilities Sonichu possesses. That would be an interesting plot twist to give Blake the role as the actual hero; however, considering Chris's writing ability, this is probably just a coincidence.

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:214-ACUltSchu.jpg
Image:215-ACUltSchuBck.jpg
Image:216-UltSchu.jpg
Image:217-UltSchuEX.jpg
Image:218-YuUltSchu.jpg
Image:SchuComic10P44.jpg
</gallery>
</center>
 
{{Sonichu}}

[[Category:Characters]]
[[Category:Imaginary Family Members]]
[[Category:Sonichus]]

/cow/

2025-05-12T08:09:46Z

Alan Pardew: /* History */ Minor grammar edit, I was close to adding more information but couldn't verify them so decided to forget it

[[Image:Redbackground.jpg|thumb|All it took was words and a red gradient to keep Chris away]]
{{Quote|Would you fuck me, 789chan? I'd fuck me.|Chris, [[It's not that cold]]}}
:''[[cwc]] redirects here. For other uses, see [[Christian Weston Chandler (disambiguation)]].''
'''/cow/''' is an image board dedicated to [[Chris]] and other lolcows. Various other imageboards have also followed Chris, including '''/cwc/''', '''Krapple''', '''Legi0n''', '''789chan''' and '''/atf/'''.

[[Ivy]] has alleged that Chris had discovered the site, based on a tip off from a successful [[white knight]], but his response was that the [[CWCipedia|colors]] [[CWC's Sonichu Site!|bothered]] him and that there were "[[Autism|too many words]]."

Chris made direct reference to the 789chan incarnation of /cwc/ in the video [[It's not that cold]], asking if they'd fuck him. In the video, he also pretends to dig up his dead dog [[Patti Chandler]] and wear her as a coat. This is also a reference to the /cwc/ board, as a vocal minority of users in Legi0n era /cwc/ kept suggesting that the [[trolls]] should hire a [[Tomgirl|tranny hooker]] to dig up Patti, as a way of trolling Chris. How much more Chris actually knew about 789chan or whether or not he browsed the board is not known.

== History ==
[[Image:anonchris.jpg|thumb|Typical /cwc/ user]]
[[Image:Cwc on cwc.png|thumb|Typical /cwc/ behaviour]]
/cwc/ was originally set up on the Krapple board, but on 1 [[November 2009]], /cwc/, as well as the entire board, was permanently deleted for CEO having ''terabytes'' of [[anime]] on server space. It was brought back soon after on a spin-off chan on Legi0n. Legi0n also later shut down due to some drama with some of its admins in [[August 2010]], and the board was moved once more to 789chan. While hosted at 789chan, /cwc/ was re-purposed as a general lolcows board rather than a Chris-centric one, though Chris still remains the most popular topic and the board's namesake. The administrator of 789chan got tired of running the website, and decided to let the project die in [[November 2012]]. This probably comes as no surprise to the users as a few months previous he explained this was soon to happen and that he was burned out from the project. Almost immediately after the loss of 789chan, a shifty Mexican business man rebuilt the site as n0chan with similar code, calling the new board /cow/. This later died, with the next incarnation being found on 888chan, which later died in [[November 2014]] when the administrator of 888chan got sick of paying for it. The board was then hosted on n0chan again, returning under new ownership before quickly dying again. The next incarnation was then formed on {{w|8chan}} in [[September 2014]], which stayed for five years before the site shut down on September 2019 after a prolonged outage due to {{w|Christchurch mosque shootings|several}} {{w|Poway synagogue shooting|recent}} {{w|2019 El Paso shooting|controversies}}. 8chan would later return under a new name, 8kun, though not before users set up another board in JulayWorld, a bunker site. As of [[August 2020]], the current incarnations can be accessed either on 8kun or AlogSpace, JulayWorld's successor and now an independent site.

==Derivative boards==
Due to the unmanageable volume of posts on /cwc/, the Legi0n staff decided to create additional, more specific Chris-related boards. '''/cxc/''' (fanfics and copypastas), '''/kcwc/''' (chris-related songs/music videos), '''/CWCrt/''' (trolling schemes), and''' /library/''' (to archive threads of major importance). The move to 789chan eventually dropped all of these boards, while adding /L/ in place of /library/.

==Other==
/cwc/ and its later incarnations also operate an IRC channel. They also had a dedicated trolling wiki, but it has since shut down.

== External links ==
*[https://8kun.top/cow/index.html /cow/'s current incarnation]
*[https://alogs.space/cow/ /cow/'s other current incarnation]
*[http://www.mediafire.com/?myc11iitiw6ud Archive on Mediafire]

{{DEFAULTSORT:cwc}}
[[Category:Websites]]
[[Category:Trolling]]

List of unheroic protagonist actions

2025-05-12T07:31:10Z

Alan Pardew: /* Sonichu #4 */

{{Incomplete}}

A recurring tragicomic element of ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' is how Chris [[Chris and writing|''tries'' to characterize]] the protagonists of his comic as [[Rollin' and Trollin'|badass]], [[Honor roll|insightful]], and [[Holding out for a hero|heroic]] yet instead unfailingly depicts his heroes as [[media:SchuComic9P37.jpg|immature]], [[:File:Sonichu - Episode 7, Page 4.jpg|maladroit]], and at times nigh on [[media:SchuComic10P35.jpg|morally bankrupt]]. Over time, the characters have engaged in enough unintentional buffoonery and villainy to easily fill an entire '''list of unheroic protagonist actions'''. While any protagonist [[Collosal Chan|worth reading about]] will have some flaws, from [[Donald Duck impersonation|Donald Duck]]'s temper to [[Sonic the Hedgehog]]'s hyperactivity, the number of vices the Sonichu characters possess are too numerable to shrug them off as portrayals of [[Liquid Chris|flawed but ultimately heroic]] characters, but rather show them as [[Ian Brandon Anderson|obliviously yet undeniably evil]].

==Recurring Shenanigans==
[[Image:Megatron_pistol2.jpg|thumb|This is neither [[Jerkhief|the first]] nor the [[Mary Lee Walsh|last time]] Chris further abuses [[Sonichu Special 4|a defeated opponent.]]]]
* The [[Pokémon]] in this series often are at least as intelligent as human beings, yet various humans tote and order them around as personal servants. This was a problem with the original series as well, but Chris doesn't even attempt to address this issue in his comic. This creates stupidity like the comic finding nothing wrong with Trainer [[Kel]] pimping out her Dragonite to slake Rosechu's lust while simultaneously finding it unremarkable that [[Kevin_the_Jew|human children can date Pokémon]].
* The protagonists are completely submissive to their raging libidos. The characters are extremely quick to hop in the sack with whoever strikes their fancy, often having known their partners for mere days or even ''hours'' beforehand. Aside from showing a lack of self-control, their hypersexuality has directly led the protagonists into danger. They tend to become uncontrollably aroused at the drop of a hat, even in the middle of an invasion of their precious city or confronting their adversaries. Needless to say, it's all very telling of the author's own [[Chris and sex|twisted views on sex and relationships]].
* The characters are overly vindictive when they have any sort of advantage over their foes. [[Manajerks#Merried_Seinor_Comic.2FKirby|Mutilation]], [[Jason Kendrick Howell|sexual assault]], and of course [[4-cent_garbage.com|mass]] [[Sonichu 9|murder]] are always on the table no matter how mildly they were originally antagonised. This is in marked contrast to the basic morality of any [[The Adventures of The American Rabbit|non-ironic]] [[Sonic the Hedgehog|hero]], where instigating or escalating a fight or seeking any revenge past what's necessary to stop a villain from committing crimes is a huge no-no.
* The heroes show absolutely no aptitude for any fighting strategy that's not 'run up to the bad guy and use superpowers until they stop'. They're unable to anticipate [[Silvana|special techniques]] or [[Dark Mirror Hole|strategies]] from their foes, have trouble doing basic coordination of attacks (unless it's to gang up on Black Sonichu), and can't perform any combat feats not constrained in the paradigm of plot-device items or the narrow application of Pokémon moves.
* [[CWCVille]]'s "government" is a nightmarish monstrosity of human rights violations and poor resource allocation that, unsurprisingly, fails to provide basic safety for its citizens. By far the most popular stock parody of Chris's work is to depict the city as a Kafkaesque dystopia that only exists to fulfill the puerile whims of its dictator-for-life mayor. What's more, this only requires a ''slight'' exaggeration of CWCVille's unsavory traits. None of the heroes, of course, have a problem with how CWCville is run, and in fact are shown to be the mayor's cronies, with complete immunity from the law, and receive free houses, credit cards and other gifts from the mayor, not unlike Soviet nomenklatura.
* Fight scenes involving the main characters often have them beating up [[jerkop|jerkops]], innocent, mentally handicapped people who've been brainwashed into becoming [[Mary Lee Walsh]]'s evil minions. It's not until ''Sonichu #9'' that anybody even tries to cure them of their brainwashing. Even then, it's explicitly mentioned that the "heroes" have killed several jerkops, knowing full well they are victims rather than villains.

==[[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]]==
[[Image:SchuComic1.jpg|thumb|"Hee Hee!"]]
===Episode #1: Sonichu's Origin===
* Sonic just sort of disappears after crashing into Pikachu, and takes the credit for Sonichu's fight against the Perfect Chaos Monster. Sonichu isn't bothered by this and even names himself after the guy who ran him over and immediately abdicated an important battle.
===Episode #2: Sonichu in 'Genesis of the Lovehogs'===
* Sonichu stalks Rosechu to her home and spies on her through the window rather than introducing himself to her like a normal person.
* Kel straight-up pimps out her Pokémon to each other. To be fair, this happens in the video games, but it's rather jarring to see outside of a game mechanics context.
===Episode #3: Sonichu vs. Naitsirhc===
* [[Giovanni]]'s son [[Naitsirhc]] is shown to have ''at least'' two Legendary Pokémon (Zapdos and Raikou) and sports even more in the team Chris describes him having. Combined with how no trainers from the video games or the anime appear in the series, this places ''Sonichu'' in a grimdark world where Team Rocket was victorious over Ash and friends, whose bodies are presumably decaying in shallow graves somewhere outside Saffron City. That, or for whatever reason, the heroes are simply not doing anything to stop Team Rocket from holding power over the world, which while less grim, is no less questionable from an ethical standpoint.

===Classic Sonichu Strips===
* [[Vamprosa|Rosechu]], a protagonist, is shown as a vampire, an undead monster that sustains its existence by draining the blood of others.
* When the comic was originally written, no reason was given in the fiction for Chris and Sonichu to attack [[Mary Lee Walsh]]. She is not depicted as doing anything more evil than merely ''existing'' and saying "Hee Hee" and "Want a girlfriend? Tough lightning!"
* No reason is given as to why Chris and Sonichu only get one shot at defeating Mary Lee Walsh. If they had missed, would they simply have left Mary to do whatever presumably evil thing she was doing?
* Rosechu does nothing but look on and say "Oh no!" while Chris is being beaten by Mary Lee Walsh's mecha-Jerkops, despite supposedly having equal power to Sonichu.

==[[Sonichu 1|''Sonichu'' #1]]==
===Episode #4: Black Sonichu in ''Darkness, Speed, & Lightning!''===
* Chris-chan sets up a potentially interesting plot twist -- [[Blake|a clone pretends fealty to their evil creators only to bide his time and betray them]] -- but then takes his sweet time resolving this subplot while Blachu sublimates his role as the villains' bitch. If Black Sonichu realized that he was forcefed a pack of bullshit and propaganda, why did he cheerfully go along with his handlers for so long before joining the forces of "good"? Did Giovanni snip off Black Sonichu's balls like a naughty poodle after he mildly sassed his son?

===Episode #5: Sonichu in ''Informal Meeting''===
* A map of the area on page twelve shows that Sonic lives fairly close to Giovanni's undisguised headquarters. Why Sonic remained oblivious of and/or ignored the existence of Pokémon's biggest villain for so long is an exercise left to the reader.

===Episode #6: Sonic and Sonichu in ''Black Metal Combat''===
* This issue is the first to show Chris's curious habit of having a character with explicitly better superpowers than their opponent or ally being totally outclassed, i.e. Sonichu's dismal performance versus Sonic the Hedgehog's unstoppable rampage, Bionic contemptuously dispatching Reldnahc, Wes-Li effortlessly beating up Chris-chan, etc. While this is a common theme in fiction to show that you can't always brute force your way through problems and that cunning, strategy, and determination can triumph over raw power, this dissonance seems to happen in Sonichu simply for the sake of making the antagonists look a bit less impotent than they really are. Due to Chris's predictable and boring style of writing, the villains are almost invariably defeated and subsequently cast aside when they and the protagonists next meet.
* Sonic, a seasoned superhero, not only lets the much more inexperienced Sonichu go in ahead of him but does so even after suspecting that they're walking into a trap. Letting Sonichu take point and even springing the aforementioned trap without so much as a warning was pretty weaselly on Sonic's part.
* After a long and arduous battle complete with SONIC SPEED and ZAPPING TO THE EXTREME, Sonichu, Sonic, and Rosechu finally have two globally infamous criminals cornered. And... the comic just forgets about them in lieu of a shopping spree at the [[CWCville Shopping Center]].

==[[Sonichu 2|''Sonichu'' #2]]==
===Episode #7: Sonichu in ''Anchuent Prophecy''===
* Wes and Sarah get personal training in how to use their hedgehog powers from the spirits of ''their'' ancestors; Chris isn't so lucky. The [[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan]] is more than happy to leave Chris to fend for himself. To his credit, Sonichu does at least help Chris get elementary training. Nonetheless, the clan leader's selective neglect of his disciple leaves Chris unaware of at [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|least]] two [[Sonichu 4#Sub-Episode 8: Christian Chandler in "Off-Target Part 2"|superpowers]] that would've made things a lot easier on Chris. Not that he needs ''more'' deus ex machinas in his corner, but still.

===Episode #8: Christian Chandler in ''Chaos & Serenity''===
* Sonichu disappears for a large portion of the battle between Wes and Chris-Chan for no good reason. Considering that Wes was trying to kill Sonichu's "father", his help would've been much appreciated.
* After Wes goes on for some time about why he's behaving evilly, Chris goes on a [[ego|self-aggrandizing]] rant and tries to paint himself as an innocent victim in the love triangle, rather than trying to negotiate with Wes or calm him down. Chris clearly is more concerned about his own [[ego]] than getting his and Wes's shit together to fulfill the [[Anchuent Prophecy]].
* Sarah, despite being told that her role in the upcoming events was to be a peacemaker between the other two humans-turned-hedgehog, decides not to intervene until her partners almost kill each other.
* Chris gets his ass kicked in less than a page by Wes in spite of having more and better superpowers than his rival.

===Episode #9: Chris-Chan, Saramah, & Wes-Li in ''The Evil that Stomped CWCville''===
* Sarah very stupidly decides to dump Wes Iseli right before the prophesied evil takes place, causing Wes's [[heart level]] to collapse right before the fated battle with [[Mary Lee Walsh]] and [[Count Graduon]]. To be fair, you could argue that it wouldn't be right to romantically string someone along just to cajole them into doing the right thing... except that she had no problem inflicting this sneaky tactic on ''Chris'' at the end of the issue.

==[[Sonichu 3|''Sonichu'' #3]]==
===Episode #10: ''Sonichu Babies''===
* Punchy unambiguously murders [[Mypoe]].
* That said, as much as we wish agony and woe on those obnoxious [[Sonee & Rosey|Sonees and Roseys]], Punchy's violent reaction to Mypoe ''mutilating him shortly after his birth'' is completely understandable. The real question is this: what kind of dojo is Shinabe running here?
* Unless he has one hell of an explanation for his actions, Mewtwo stole Magi-chan's childhood and sculpted him into the borderline-[[autism|autistic]] he is today for his own reasons. [[Chris and writing|Not that we'll]] [[Sonichu 11|ever know these reasons]].

===Episode #11: The Chaotic Combo in ''When Hedgehogs Meet''===
* Why is something as powerful and calamitous as the [[Legendary Master Sunstone]] just sitting out in the open, guarded solely by a powerless [[Flame the Sunbird|parrot]]? At the very least it should be placed somewhere hidden. Then again, the Sunstone ceases to become an issue after this comic so maybe the mayor did something smart for once and squirreled it [[List of things Chris has shoved up his ass|someplace more secure]].
* Speaking of [[Flame the Sunbird]], he's only able to fly for about 20 miles (the distance between the shores to where Bubbles is) before being winded. For a bird, especially one that's a self-styled guardian, this is a pathetic level of physical fitness.
* Every single member of the Chaotic Combo pile on Black Sonichu at the end and just beat him to a bloody pulp. While he overpowered them one on one, Black Sonichu getting dogpiled by half a dozen mutants and left bleeding and disfigured doesn't exactly suggest an even fight between a team of heroes and a powerful villain. Besides, Black Sonichu didn't even mean to aggravate them.

==[[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu'' #4]]==
* Chris refuses to leave every time he's called out for soliciting sex.
* Chris [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|curses]] a [[Jerkhief|man]], making him lose his wife, kids, and home, all because he was told not to stand around like a [[Creepy stare|creep]].
* Chris throws a [[Chris and anger|temper tantrum]] because a [[Hanna|girl]] played a prank on him.
* Chris breaks into an [[Mary Lee Walsh|old woman's]] home (not the [[Sonichu 0|first time]] nor the [[Sonichu 10|last]]) completely unprovoked and beats the shit out of her.
* Chris's self-insert fails, forcing Chris's other [[Sonichu (character)|self-insert]] to help his sorry ass.
* Chris and his [[Sonichu (character)|bastard son]] brutally murder a defenseless old woman in cold blood.
* Chris and [[Darkbind Sonichu|another one of his recolors]] injure [[B-Manajerk|two]] [[Merried Seinor Comic|people]] for asking him to leave the store.
* Chris and his [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|emotionless fuck-buddy]] decapitate [[W-M-Manajerk|someone]] for telling him to leave. Granted, said person's head could be removed more-or-less unharmed, but football-kicking it into an old woman's face afterward pushes it right into one of these.
* Chris makes fun of [[Slow-in-the-minds|mentally handicapped people]].
* Chris and his [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|personified sexual insecurity]] beat the shit out of [[Bagget|some]] [[Mary Lee Walsh|more]] [[Count Graduon|people]] for (and you're not going to guess this) telling him to leave a [[Get-Tar Region|store]] after loitering looking for [[Boyfriend-free girl|boyfriend-free girls]].

==[[Sonichu 5|''Sonichu'' #5]]==
===Episode #12: Christian Chandler in ''My Best Friend's Cherokian Wedding''===
* Chris is invisibly spying on the wedding. Meaning that he wasn't invited and decided to just [[The GAMe PLACe|show up anyway]] or that he was but just [[The Tale Of The Crazy Pacer|likes creeping around for no reason]].
* What exactly was stopping Chris from deploying another Trap Card, or at the very least, warning the crowd when he realized that his reasoning wasn't getting through? Innocent bystanders might have gotten hurt or even killed.
* With all of the craziness that happens in CWCVille, Sarah Spicer was careless to not have her lightning bracelets at arms length whether or not they clashed with her wedding gown. Chris evidently believes women care more about matching their outfits than about protecting the people they love. Also, why couldn't she just get a gown that didn't clash?
* Boy, those [[Yu-Gi-Oh!]] cards sure came in handy this chapter and previously in episode #8. All of those versatile, powerful, yet easily-deployable effects should make protecting CWCVille and saving innocents a breeze! Too bad Chris lost interest in the franchise after this issue, so they'll never be seen or even mentioned again.

===Episode #13: ''Smashed Hearts & Entrapment''===

==[[Sonichu 6|''Sonichu'' #6]]==
===Episode #12.5: ''One Lucky Dog''===
* Chris resurrects his pet dog. In-story she merely turned from a dog into a magical talking dog, but Chris doesn't hide what he's really doing. Regardless of how many people die in the comic's pages--from innocent bystanders, to victims of circumstance, to real-life gal pals--CWC has only extended this mercy [[Simonla Rosechu|once more.]]
* With the introduction of [[Allison Amber]], it becomes obvious that even in his fantasy world, Chris is too lazy to do any of his mayoral duties that won't help him look cool or punish his enemies. What's more, an unelected city employee way down the chain of command has been promoted to Vice Mayor, although we were led to believe [[Women's rights|she was just an overpowered secretary]] for a long time. Allison performs almost literally all of Chris's mayoral duties, which is [[Chris and the law|highly illegal]] because she doesn't have the relevant authority.

===Episode #14: ''Evil is Afoot!''===
* Allowing his [[Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc|defeated enemy]] mercy and attentive medical treatment is probably the most uncharacteristically nice thing Chris does in this comic. Unfortunately, the magnanimity of this gesture is ruined by the fact that there's absolutely no security in Reldnahc's room during his convalescence, leaving Chris's arch-nemesis free to just ''walk out of the hospital''.

==[[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]==
===Episode #15: Sonichu, Magi-Chan, and Christian in ''Time for a Ball''===
* [[Bionic]] (Chris's first bastard child) makes the highly progressive assumption that [[Third date|women always put out after the third date]].
* Chris and Magi-Chan introduce a convenient [[Chris and writing|plot device]] to help them solve their seemingly nonexistent problems. The question here is that if they knew about them this whole time, why wait until now to 'search' for them? Chris could have easily used them in the past to stop [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|villains]] in the past, yet decided to postpone it to the point where it would cost [[Ivy|countless]] [[Pandahalo|lives]].

===Episode #16: C.W.C. and Sonichu in ''Time Hogs''===
* Sonichu and Magi-Chan are too busy discussing [[Hanky panky|sex]] to realize that Chris has been flung out of the time sphere, giving no thought to helping him. Magi-Chan should have been able to sense it telepathically or whatever.

===''Tune in Everyday to Station KCWC for Everything!''===

==[[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]]==
[[Image:Bigboss.JPG|thumb|What does your existentialist philosophy say about FURRY FACE RAPE, Jason?]]
===Episode #17: ''Rage against the Garbage''===
* Rosechu is so ignorant about how the Internet and [[troll]]ing works that she thinks that taking nudes of herself is going to overwhelm the flow of [[Rosechu#Transgender Drama|shemale]] pictures. Amusingly, this is one of the few instances where a protagonist is immediately broken of their delusions.
* Sonichu, Wild, and Rosechu plot burglary without even ''trying'' to negotiate for the Sonichu Balls. As far as we know, Jason is the rightful owner and Sonichu's crew are a bunch of thieves.
* Wild's family is harassed by arsonists and his father is kidnapped by poachers but the putative Mayor clearly can't be bothered to stop stuffing his face with chicken nuggets long enough to take care of the problem.
* For that matter, Wild couldn't even be assed to look for his own damn father himself. Even if he was still too weak to mount a solo rescue, at this point in the comic he knows at least ten other characters with powers similar or superior to his own and has no excuse for not resuming his quest. Then again, Wild probably knew that his 'friends' were too self-absorbed to give a shit about anyone else anyway. Hell, Sonichu and Rosechu couldn't be bothered to do anything more than go 'oh, that sucks' at Wild's tearjerker.
* Sonichu, Rosechu, and Wild very stupidly schedule the latter's infiltration at the same time as their meeting with the owner of 4-cent garbage. Jason knows that they will be here, so why would they undertake this dangerous and important mission when he's on alert? Then again, Wild doesn't meet any resistance more stringent than a locked safe so it doesn't matter anyway.
* On several floors, Sonichu, Rosechu, and even Chris physically attack people whose only crime is uploading pictures to the Internet.
* Jason Kendrick Howell flat-out admits that he owns an [[Kathleen|underage sex slave]] that he does illegal things with. Sonichu and Rosechu can't even give the tiniest of shits about this grievous affront to human dignity. They're only concerned about Rosechu being drawn with a penis.
* After Jason taunts Sonichu and Rosechu, both attack him and in the latter's case attempts to rape/kill him. Jason only survives thanks to dark forces keeping him alive.
* The 19th Amendment, securing the right of women to vote, apparently doesn't [[Chris and sexism|apply to CWCVille]]. You know, a city supposedly existing within the borders of the United States.
* Rosechu thinks that laws preventing a 14-year old from being able to [[pedofork|assist in nude protests]] are "dumb".

===Episode #18: ''Spring Break 2008''===
* The protagonists are overly quick to forgive Blake. Granted, being a [[The Adventures of The American Rabbit|Saturday morning cartoon villain]], his villainy hasn't exceeded 'kidnap Rosechu and get <s>his</s> her teeth knocked out' -- a far cry from the mass murders the heroes cause in Sonichu 10 to be sure. Nonetheless, it's still dumb for the other protagonists to implicitly trust someone who was only a few months ago working for [[Robotnik|two]] of the [[Giovanni|biggest criminals]] on the planet.
* Bubbles is astonishingly stupid and careless when dealing with Silvana-Blake. Despite getting two credible warnings from Magi-Chan and Jiggliami/Blake that she was about to fuck an impostor, she's still not convinced.
* Blake has more of an excuse than Bubbles than his actions, but wasn't he the tiniest bit suspicious that Bubbles aborted her mission in order to have nasty furry jungle sex?

==[[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]]==
===Episode #19: ''Date Ed (Even Though the Idea Sounds Dated)''===
* This is not the heroes' fault, but the [[Dating Education]] class is mind-meltingly idiotic. The coursework is piss-easy what with fifty-word essays, the IM portion being unsupervised, and an enormous douche like Reginald almost getting a perfect score. If the characters had an ounce of self-respect they would have dropped this worthless class by day two and demanded their money back.
* [[Ivy]] refuses to pair up with anyone because she is holding out for Chris, despite this nominally being just practice. Since the class has equal amounts of boys and girls, this means George Philip, the boy she got paired up with, is being screwed over. Somehow, Ivy still gets a 99% in the class.
* The heroes apparently have trouble discerning the identities of people with extremely obvious screen names, which doesn't speak well of their intelligence. Gee, I wonder who [[Simonla Rosechu|DigDugette416]] could be?
* [[Reginald Sneasel]] is, and let's be frank here, a ''[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|fulminating asshole]]''. Reginald lets down his IM partner and classmate FlorDora217 because of his [[Layla]] obsession, intentionally spreads scurrilous rumors about her, sabotages school equipment, and stalks the two on their date. By contrast, Punchy decides to cooperate with Layla and tries to keep an open mind about her despite also having his eye on [[Angelica Rosechu|someone else]], foils Reginald's cunning plan with his counter-gambit of 'have his [[Wild Sonichu|best buddy]] ask Layla directly', and acts like a perfect gentleman on his date. How sad is it that you come off as more of a jerk than a sex-crazed, [[Punchy and Layla's Dance In The Dark|sadomasochistic]] Knuckles headswap? This wouldn't be so bad if Reginald was set up to be the typical jealous-yet-hapless rival suitor that potboiler romantic comedies thrive upon, but given his fate in this episode and the rest of [[Sonichu 9]], he's clearly meant to be a ''sympathetic character''.
* Ms. Jackaras just abruptly dies halfway through the narrative and nobody even reacts except her sister, who replaces her instantly for some reason. Her sister mourns for precisely one panel.

===Episode #20: ''CWC-Defense''===
* Sonichu gets a glimpse of his wife's panties while she's doing laundry and turns into a drooling pervert. Very classy of you, sweet-bolt.
* Sonichu goes on an unprompted, uncomfortably long homophobic tirade that makes him look violent and psychopathic, complete with breaking the couple's property.
* Why hasn't CWCville elected or at least appointed a new interim mayor yet? It's been several months since Chris was trapped in the time void, and there's no reason to think that he'll be back anytime soon, or even at all at this point. Again, the city is forced to dump way too many important decisions on an over-promoted secretary. This gets discussed further in the next section.
* Prower can transform into a [[media:Prowl_prower.jpg|giant robot]] and was very close-by, yet he failed to help Punchy and Layla when they were surrounded by [[Jerkop]]s. Punchy was able to take care of himself, but Layla was clearly unused to fighting and almost got her head handed to her.
* CWCVille's hapless defenders are completely blindsided by the [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|PVCC]], sending their [[Chaotic Combo|heavy-hitters]] on wild goose chases all around the city while apparently not thinking to leave the [[CWCville Shopping Center]], the seat of the municipal government and the main target of the invasion, with any better defenders than [[Zapina Rosechu|a skanky tween girl]] and a [[Patti-Chan|half-naked zombie dog]].
* When the combined forces of Sonic recolors and Autobot rejects prove to be inadequate for defending the city, [[Allison Amber]] doesn't even bother to let the media know, let alone try to get assistance. Bionic and Darkbind for instance, only realize what's going on as the conflict starts spilling out past the city borders.
* Even if Chris is the one fated to [[Anchuent Prophecy|personally stop Graduon and Walsh]], there's still no reason for Sonichu to just let her fly away and regroup, especially when he literally had her at arms' length and in a position to easily capture or otherwise finish off.
* After the battle is over, the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon show basically no concern about [[Chris and death|the destruction that has befallen their city]].

==[[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]]==
[[File:SandyKiller.JPG|thumb|Having a little girl torture her [[Evan|grandpa]]? Totally normal behavior from your heroes!]]
===Episode #21: ''Christian Chandler in Director Amenities''===
* The amount of sheer evil the "protagonists" exhibit in this issue clearly shows their transition from [[Blake|bumbling yet harmless goons]] to [[The Incredible Lioness|terrifyingly violent and sadistic psychopaths]]. From [[Lovely Weather#Deception|rape by deception]] to [[Sonichu_10#Curing_Da_Homos|genocide]], this issue has it all.
* Chris poisons the planet's water supplies with his "[[Homos|straight]]" blood, thereby initiating a genocide against homosexuals, bisexuals and asexuals worldwide. Aside from being ethically perverse, this scheme shows an [[honor roll|inexcusable ignorance of simple science]]. Those few crates would barely be enough to infect a modern city's water supply for a few days, let alone worldwide. Transferring a vaccine through the water supply is also ludicrous; not only would the treatment facilities dilute and kill the immunizing vectors, blood-stomach ingestion is one of the weakest ways to transmit a disease.
* Chris ''{{w|Rape by deception|rapes}}'' his future self's wife by [[Liquid Chris|pretending to be his future self]].
* Chris blows up a building filled with "devil [[trolls]]", sealing it up beforehand as well to ensure that none can escape as he does so.
* Chris (by now you're probably realizing it's almost ''all'' Chris) breaks [[Jimmy Hill|a man]]'s [[Fangs|teeth]] because he [[Parody|parodied]] him.
* Chris violently injects his own blood into his [[Reldnahc|nemesis]], in some sort of harebrained scheme to turn him straight.
* Chris then teleports Reldnahc straight into the domicile of Kel without so much as a trial or medical examination, under the excuse that his evil behavior was due to his recent transformation into an evil homosexual hedgehog. Though stripped of his [[Anchuent Prophecy]]-granted powers, Reldnahc was already on the side of the bad guys before his transformation. Thus Chris just delivered a world-class Pokémon trainer working for one of the biggest criminal organizations straight into the arms of one of his unsuspecting friends!
* Chris and the [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys|Hedgehog Boys]] destroy a populated high-rise building, killing and injuring hundreds of innocent people in an act of extreme [[Twin Falling Towers|terrorism]], because they drew pictures of his imaginary friends with [[Pickles|pee-pees]].
* Chris punches someone in the face hard enough to knock out his teeth, for sardonically referring to him as 'miss'.
* Chris and Sonichu trespass in [[Apologies to Alec and Evan|Alec Benson's Leary - Alec Benson's... Try saying that three times fast with plurals. Heh.]] Chris and Sonichu trespass in [[Alec Benson Leary|Alec's]] house, before Chris destroys all of his computer data and then the computer itself.
* Chris and Sonichu then [[Chris and copyright|plagiarize]] all of Alec's [[True and honest|TRUE and HONEST]] creations, followed by having them beat the shit out of Alec and accusing him of keeping [[Rape|female prisoners]] in his basement.
* [[Collosal Chan]] breaks into an [[Mary Lee Walsh|old woman]]'s house completely unprovoked, and brutally attacks her to the extent of causing permanent paralysis, before having her stripped of her powers and sent to a maximum security prison with no trial.
* Collosal Chan also willingly smashes the staff [[Count Graduon]] is sealed in and releases him at Mary's request, so she can "punish [Graduon] another day."
* Magi-chan shows no sympathy for Silvana's literal emasculation. To be fair, Silvana being gender-changed against her will (she refused a previous offer) is an unavoidable side-effect of stopping the mad [[Count Graduon]], but that's no reason for him to be so gleeful about it.
* Magi-Chan, the inhuman monster he is, informs [[Sandy|an infant]] only minutes old that her mother was murdered by '[[Evan]]'. That's right, even infancy doesn't get you out of your duties as Chris's personal bodyguard.
* Chris and his [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|corrupted officials]] have a show trial for [[Asperpedia|four innocent men]], before having them sentenced to death, with little to no evidence against them.
* Chris and his entourage, including a one-week-old girl and a [[Kel|preteen]], brutally execute four people in violent and inhumane ways. Remember, this is a comic Chris [[Chris and censorship|claims is aimed at children]].
* Chris disrespects [[Wikipedia:Flag Day in Mexico|a national holiday]] by being an [[Chris and his ego|egotistical]] jackass.

==[[Sonichu 11|''Sonichu'' #11]]==

===''Episode #22: A Sonichu Christmas''===

-WIP-
* Cerah makes a big deal about making a special cookie for a Jewish kid named Kevin in an uncomfortably awkward attempt at sensitivity. The cookie, made in the vague shape of a candle, bears no resemblance to any Jewish symbol. The cookie is vanilla-flavored, in case the kid has some kind of food allergy. Rosechu and Cerah do not consider that anyone other than Jews might have food allergies.

===''Episode #23: Simonchu & Bananafunkle''===

* When Simonchu returns to see his sister, he is met with extreme hostility by both Sandy and Wild, with Sandy threatening to use Horn Drill to kill him and Wild even knocking him unconscious on sight. It's only until after Simonla shouts at them do they back down. It should also be made note of that [[Retroactive continuity in Sonichu|since Simonla never died]], neither Wild nor Sandy have any reason to act as violently as they do.
* After an intense night of fucking, [[Reginald Sneasel]] evolves into a Weavile and proceeds to destroy everything in the church. When Angelica wakes and finds him, he says he's too far gone as some sort of monster. Later in the episode, he hooks up with [[Layla]] and seems to have full control over his new form. It should be known that [[Chris and Writing|Weavile don't become more vicious upon evolving]], so that means that Reginald effectively used his evolution as an easy way out after ripping apart Angelica's church and breaking up with her.
* Simonchu apparently discovers a fossil of an undocumented Pokémon, which has been brought back to life. Said Pokémon also apparently used to be human high school senior and was hit by a car before being brought back as a new Pokémon... [[Chris and Writing|somehow]]. Rather then give it to proper researchers of the field for further study, Simonchu dumps it on [[Punchy Sonichu]] because he's apparently the only one who can understand it.
* Punchy agreeing to bring [[Bananasauros]] to his home to live with him wouldn't be all too terrible... if Layla, his girlfriend, wasn't ''also'' living with him. And of course, he didn't call ahead to say he was bringing company; let alone some weird banana dinosaur.
* While Bananasauros is effectively an animal who has little control over the situation, he is fully aware that him being there is straining Punchy and Layla's relationship. He doesn't bring it up or care, instead mooching off of Punchy's welfare and just sitting on the couch and gaming. In the end, Layla does indeed move out, and he shows no remorse for causing it.
* For the sake of science and research, Punchy gets Bananasauros to fuck a Ditto to make some eggs. Remember that this is a human mind inside of a dinosaur banana's body, being forced to have sex for whatever the hell species he is now.
* Before leaving, Layla flat-out punches Bananasauros in the face. While Layla has every right to be angry at Bananasauros, he'd done nothing to instigate that.

===''The Clip Show: Catching Up''===

==[[Sonichu 12]]==
===Episode 24, Part 2: The Clip Show: Catching Up===
*Sonichu has a dream where Rosechu and Chris are both trapped in a fire, and he only has time to save one of them. If he saves Chris, then Rosechu will die, and Sonichu won't be able to live without her. If he saves Rosechu, then Chris will die, and CWCville will have no mayor and cease to exist, <s>killing everyone in it</s> leaving everyone "lost in a void forever". Sonichu then saves Rosechu, abandoning everyone to their fate for the sake of someone who, for the record, will die anyway as a result of his own actions.

==''Sonichu'' Specials==
* In ''[[Sonichu Special 4]]'', Chris decides to take matters into his own hands rather than contacting the local police and/or sending in an ally that could get to [[Kacey]]'s [[Liquid Chris|kidnapper]]'s location faster than he could driving at the speed limit.
* After Chris disarms and wristlocks the kidnapper, Chris intentionally trips him and shoots him in each knee. This is at the very least maiming; Chris is fortunate that his opponent survived to star in [[Episode 20|CWC Defense]], otherwise he'd be facing charges of 2nd or even 1st degree murder. Or not, since CWCVille is effectively an absolute monarchy; Chris rules with undefined power and is of course above the law.

==[[Mailbag]]==
* One needs to read [[Mailbag 5#Chris does not know what "benevolent" means, or how government works|Mailbag 5]] in conjunction with [[Sonichu 10]] to really grasp the scope of this problem, but the CWCVille municipal government is extremely flawed. There are at least three major problems with the administration: the first is that after being thrown into the [[Time Void]], an interim mayor should have been appointed from the city council's ranks if Chris was going to be gone for so long. Who this would be varies depending on the city's charter but this person is typically the chief administrator officer -- which for a city of CWCVille's size would be an elected position (and not Allison Amber) unless the democratic trappings are even more of a sham than we thought. The second is that we never actually see them doing any work. Why, for example, was city defense left (again) to Allison Amber instead of the chief of police? The third is that the city council didn't do anything to stop or inform others Chris's plan to commit mass murder despite him flat-out telling them; even an amateur paralegal would be able to get charges of conspiracy and accessory to murder to stick.
* In gross violation of the 1st, 4th, 5th, and 14th Amendments of the U.S. Constitution Chris reveals that [[Mailbag_31#Magi-Chan_knows_when_you_fuck|Magi-chan is engaged in psychic surveillance on CWCVille's populace]] to ensure that homosexuality is - as it in the author's own mind - thoroughly suppressed.

==See Also==
*[[Chris and writing]]
*[[CWCVille]] - For a more in-depth analysis of the various municipal failings of [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu's]] primary setting.

{{Sonichu}}
[[Category:Comic]][[Category:Lists]][[Category:Villains]]

List of unheroic protagonist actions

2025-05-12T07:12:48Z

Alan Pardew: /* Episode #4: Black Sonichu in Darkness, Speed, & Lightning! */ Minor rewording

{{Incomplete}}

A recurring tragicomic element of ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' is how Chris [[Chris and writing|''tries'' to characterize]] the protagonists of his comic as [[Rollin' and Trollin'|badass]], [[Honor roll|insightful]], and [[Holding out for a hero|heroic]] yet instead unfailingly depicts his heroes as [[media:SchuComic9P37.jpg|immature]], [[:File:Sonichu - Episode 7, Page 4.jpg|maladroit]], and at times nigh on [[media:SchuComic10P35.jpg|morally bankrupt]]. Over time, the characters have engaged in enough unintentional buffoonery and villainy to easily fill an entire '''list of unheroic protagonist actions'''. While any protagonist [[Collosal Chan|worth reading about]] will have some flaws, from [[Donald Duck impersonation|Donald Duck]]'s temper to [[Sonic the Hedgehog]]'s hyperactivity, the number of vices the Sonichu characters possess are too numerable to shrug them off as portrayals of [[Liquid Chris|flawed but ultimately heroic]] characters, but rather show them as [[Ian Brandon Anderson|obliviously yet undeniably evil]].

==Recurring Shenanigans==
[[Image:Megatron_pistol2.jpg|thumb|This is neither [[Jerkhief|the first]] nor the [[Mary Lee Walsh|last time]] Chris further abuses [[Sonichu Special 4|a defeated opponent.]]]]
* The [[Pokémon]] in this series often are at least as intelligent as human beings, yet various humans tote and order them around as personal servants. This was a problem with the original series as well, but Chris doesn't even attempt to address this issue in his comic. This creates stupidity like the comic finding nothing wrong with Trainer [[Kel]] pimping out her Dragonite to slake Rosechu's lust while simultaneously finding it unremarkable that [[Kevin_the_Jew|human children can date Pokémon]].
* The protagonists are completely submissive to their raging libidos. The characters are extremely quick to hop in the sack with whoever strikes their fancy, often having known their partners for mere days or even ''hours'' beforehand. Aside from showing a lack of self-control, their hypersexuality has directly led the protagonists into danger. They tend to become uncontrollably aroused at the drop of a hat, even in the middle of an invasion of their precious city or confronting their adversaries. Needless to say, it's all very telling of the author's own [[Chris and sex|twisted views on sex and relationships]].
* The characters are overly vindictive when they have any sort of advantage over their foes. [[Manajerks#Merried_Seinor_Comic.2FKirby|Mutilation]], [[Jason Kendrick Howell|sexual assault]], and of course [[4-cent_garbage.com|mass]] [[Sonichu 9|murder]] are always on the table no matter how mildly they were originally antagonised. This is in marked contrast to the basic morality of any [[The Adventures of The American Rabbit|non-ironic]] [[Sonic the Hedgehog|hero]], where instigating or escalating a fight or seeking any revenge past what's necessary to stop a villain from committing crimes is a huge no-no.
* The heroes show absolutely no aptitude for any fighting strategy that's not 'run up to the bad guy and use superpowers until they stop'. They're unable to anticipate [[Silvana|special techniques]] or [[Dark Mirror Hole|strategies]] from their foes, have trouble doing basic coordination of attacks (unless it's to gang up on Black Sonichu), and can't perform any combat feats not constrained in the paradigm of plot-device items or the narrow application of Pokémon moves.
* [[CWCVille]]'s "government" is a nightmarish monstrosity of human rights violations and poor resource allocation that, unsurprisingly, fails to provide basic safety for its citizens. By far the most popular stock parody of Chris's work is to depict the city as a Kafkaesque dystopia that only exists to fulfill the puerile whims of its dictator-for-life mayor. What's more, this only requires a ''slight'' exaggeration of CWCVille's unsavory traits. None of the heroes, of course, have a problem with how CWCville is run, and in fact are shown to be the mayor's cronies, with complete immunity from the law, and receive free houses, credit cards and other gifts from the mayor, not unlike Soviet nomenklatura.
* Fight scenes involving the main characters often have them beating up [[jerkop|jerkops]], innocent, mentally handicapped people who've been brainwashed into becoming [[Mary Lee Walsh]]'s evil minions. It's not until ''Sonichu #9'' that anybody even tries to cure them of their brainwashing. Even then, it's explicitly mentioned that the "heroes" have killed several jerkops, knowing full well they are victims rather than villains.

==[[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]]==
[[Image:SchuComic1.jpg|thumb|"Hee Hee!"]]
===Episode #1: Sonichu's Origin===
* Sonic just sort of disappears after crashing into Pikachu, and takes the credit for Sonichu's fight against the Perfect Chaos Monster. Sonichu isn't bothered by this and even names himself after the guy who ran him over and immediately abdicated an important battle.
===Episode #2: Sonichu in 'Genesis of the Lovehogs'===
* Sonichu stalks Rosechu to her home and spies on her through the window rather than introducing himself to her like a normal person.
* Kel straight-up pimps out her Pokémon to each other. To be fair, this happens in the video games, but it's rather jarring to see outside of a game mechanics context.
===Episode #3: Sonichu vs. Naitsirhc===
* [[Giovanni]]'s son [[Naitsirhc]] is shown to have ''at least'' two Legendary Pokémon (Zapdos and Raikou) and sports even more in the team Chris describes him having. Combined with how no trainers from the video games or the anime appear in the series, this places ''Sonichu'' in a grimdark world where Team Rocket was victorious over Ash and friends, whose bodies are presumably decaying in shallow graves somewhere outside Saffron City. That, or for whatever reason, the heroes are simply not doing anything to stop Team Rocket from holding power over the world, which while less grim, is no less questionable from an ethical standpoint.

===Classic Sonichu Strips===
* [[Vamprosa|Rosechu]], a protagonist, is shown as a vampire, an undead monster that sustains its existence by draining the blood of others.
* When the comic was originally written, no reason was given in the fiction for Chris and Sonichu to attack [[Mary Lee Walsh]]. She is not depicted as doing anything more evil than merely ''existing'' and saying "Hee Hee" and "Want a girlfriend? Tough lightning!"
* No reason is given as to why Chris and Sonichu only get one shot at defeating Mary Lee Walsh. If they had missed, would they simply have left Mary to do whatever presumably evil thing she was doing?
* Rosechu does nothing but look on and say "Oh no!" while Chris is being beaten by Mary Lee Walsh's mecha-Jerkops, despite supposedly having equal power to Sonichu.

==[[Sonichu 1|''Sonichu'' #1]]==
===Episode #4: Black Sonichu in ''Darkness, Speed, & Lightning!''===
* Chris-chan sets up a potentially interesting plot twist -- [[Blake|a clone pretends fealty to their evil creators only to bide his time and betray them]] -- but then takes his sweet time resolving this subplot while Blachu sublimates his role as the villains' bitch. If Black Sonichu realized that he was forcefed a pack of bullshit and propaganda, why did he cheerfully go along with his handlers for so long before joining the forces of "good"? Did Giovanni snip off Black Sonichu's balls like a naughty poodle after he mildly sassed his son?

===Episode #5: Sonichu in ''Informal Meeting''===
* A map of the area on page twelve shows that Sonic lives fairly close to Giovanni's undisguised headquarters. Why Sonic remained oblivious of and/or ignored the existence of Pokémon's biggest villain for so long is an exercise left to the reader.

===Episode #6: Sonic and Sonichu in ''Black Metal Combat''===
* This issue is the first to show Chris's curious habit of having a character with explicitly better superpowers than their opponent or ally being totally outclassed, i.e. Sonichu's dismal performance versus Sonic the Hedgehog's unstoppable rampage, Bionic contemptuously dispatching Reldnahc, Wes-Li effortlessly beating up Chris-chan, etc. While this is a common theme in fiction to show that you can't always brute force your way through problems and that cunning, strategy, and determination can triumph over raw power, this dissonance seems to happen in Sonichu simply for the sake of making the antagonists look a bit less impotent than they really are. Due to Chris's predictable and boring style of writing, the villains are almost invariably defeated and subsequently cast aside when they and the protagonists next meet.
* Sonic, a seasoned superhero, not only lets the much more inexperienced Sonichu go in ahead of him but does so even after suspecting that they're walking into a trap. Letting Sonichu take point and even springing the aforementioned trap without so much as a warning was pretty weaselly on Sonic's part.
* After a long and arduous battle complete with SONIC SPEED and ZAPPING TO THE EXTREME, Sonichu, Sonic, and Rosechu finally have two globally infamous criminals cornered. And... the comic just forgets about them in lieu of a shopping spree at the [[CWCville Shopping Center]].

==[[Sonichu 2|''Sonichu'' #2]]==
===Episode #7: Sonichu in ''Anchuent Prophecy''===
* Wes and Sarah get personal training in how to use their hedgehog powers from the spirits of ''their'' ancestors; Chris isn't so lucky. The [[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan]] is more than happy to leave Chris to fend for himself. To his credit, Sonichu does at least help Chris get elementary training. Nonetheless, the clan leader's selective neglect of his disciple leaves Chris unaware of at [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|least]] two [[Sonichu 4#Sub-Episode 8: Christian Chandler in "Off-Target Part 2"|superpowers]] that would've made things a lot easier on Chris. Not that he needs ''more'' deus ex machinas in his corner, but still.

===Episode #8: Christian Chandler in ''Chaos & Serenity''===
* Sonichu disappears for a large portion of the battle between Wes and Chris-Chan for no good reason. Considering that Wes was trying to kill Sonichu's "father", his help would've been much appreciated.
* After Wes goes on for some time about why he's behaving evilly, Chris goes on a [[ego|self-aggrandizing]] rant and tries to paint himself as an innocent victim in the love triangle, rather than trying to negotiate with Wes or calm him down. Chris clearly is more concerned about his own [[ego]] than getting his and Wes's shit together to fulfill the [[Anchuent Prophecy]].
* Sarah, despite being told that her role in the upcoming events was to be a peacemaker between the other two humans-turned-hedgehog, decides not to intervene until her partners almost kill each other.
* Chris gets his ass kicked in less than a page by Wes in spite of having more and better superpowers than his rival.

===Episode #9: Chris-Chan, Saramah, & Wes-Li in ''The Evil that Stomped CWCville''===
* Sarah very stupidly decides to dump Wes Iseli right before the prophesied evil takes place, causing Wes's [[heart level]] to collapse right before the fated battle with [[Mary Lee Walsh]] and [[Count Graduon]]. To be fair, you could argue that it wouldn't be right to romantically string someone along just to cajole them into doing the right thing... except that she had no problem inflicting this sneaky tactic on ''Chris'' at the end of the issue.

==[[Sonichu 3|''Sonichu'' #3]]==
===Episode #10: ''Sonichu Babies''===
* Punchy unambiguously murders [[Mypoe]].
* That said, as much as we wish agony and woe on those obnoxious [[Sonee & Rosey|Sonees and Roseys]], Punchy's violent reaction to Mypoe ''mutilating him shortly after his birth'' is completely understandable. The real question is this: what kind of dojo is Shinabe running here?
* Unless he has one hell of an explanation for his actions, Mewtwo stole Magi-chan's childhood and sculpted him into the borderline-[[autism|autistic]] he is today for his own reasons. [[Chris and writing|Not that we'll]] [[Sonichu 11|ever know these reasons]].

===Episode #11: The Chaotic Combo in ''When Hedgehogs Meet''===
* Why is something as powerful and calamitous as the [[Legendary Master Sunstone]] just sitting out in the open, guarded solely by a powerless [[Flame the Sunbird|parrot]]? At the very least it should be placed somewhere hidden. Then again, the Sunstone ceases to become an issue after this comic so maybe the mayor did something smart for once and squirreled it [[List of things Chris has shoved up his ass|someplace more secure]].
* Speaking of [[Flame the Sunbird]], he's only able to fly for about 20 miles (the distance between the shores to where Bubbles is) before being winded. For a bird, especially one that's a self-styled guardian, this is a pathetic level of physical fitness.
* Every single member of the Chaotic Combo pile on Black Sonichu at the end and just beat him to a bloody pulp. While he overpowered them one on one, Black Sonichu getting dogpiled by half a dozen mutants and left bleeding and disfigured doesn't exactly suggest an even fight between a team of heroes and a powerful villain. Besides, Black Sonichu didn't even mean to aggravate them.

==[[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu'' #4]]==
* Chris refuses to leave every time he's called out for soliciting sex.
* Chris [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|curses]] a [[Jerkhief|man]], making him lose his wife, kids, and home, all because he was told not to stand around like a [[Creepy stare|creep]].
* Chris throws a [[Chris and anger|temper tantrum]] because a [[Hanna|girl]] played a prank on him.
* Chris breaks into an [[Mary Lee Walsh|old woman's]] home (not the [[Sonichu 0|first time]] nor the [[Sonichu 10|last]]) completely unprovoked and beats the shit out of her.
* Chris's self-insert fails, forcing Chris's other [[Sonichu (character)|self-insert]] to help his sorry ass.
* Chris and his [[Sonichu (character)|bastard son]] brutally murder a defenseless old woman in cold blood.
* Chris and [[Darkbind Sonichu|another one of his recolors]] injure [[B-Manajerk|two]] [[Merried Seinor Comic|people]] for asking him to leave the store.
* Chris and his [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|emotionless fuck-buddy]] decapitate [[W-M-Manajerk|someone]] for telling him to leave. Granted, said person's head could be removed more-or-less unharmed, but football-kicking it into an old woman's face afterward pushes it right into one of these.
* Chris makes fun of [[Slow-in-the-minds|mentally handicapped people]].
* Chris and his [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|personified sexual insecurity]] beat the shit out of [[Bagget|some]] [[Mary Lee Walsh|more]] [[Count Graduon|people]] for (and you're not going to guess this) telling him to leave a [[Get-Tar Region|store]].

==[[Sonichu 5|''Sonichu'' #5]]==
===Episode #12: Christian Chandler in ''My Best Friend's Cherokian Wedding''===
* Chris is invisibly spying on the wedding. Meaning that he wasn't invited and decided to just [[The GAMe PLACe|show up anyway]] or that he was but just [[The Tale Of The Crazy Pacer|likes creeping around for no reason]].
* What exactly was stopping Chris from deploying another Trap Card, or at the very least, warning the crowd when he realized that his reasoning wasn't getting through? Innocent bystanders might have gotten hurt or even killed.
* With all of the craziness that happens in CWCVille, Sarah Spicer was careless to not have her lightning bracelets at arms length whether or not they clashed with her wedding gown. Chris evidently believes women care more about matching their outfits than about protecting the people they love. Also, why couldn't she just get a gown that didn't clash?
* Boy, those [[Yu-Gi-Oh!]] cards sure came in handy this chapter and previously in episode #8. All of those versatile, powerful, yet easily-deployable effects should make protecting CWCVille and saving innocents a breeze! Too bad Chris lost interest in the franchise after this issue, so they'll never be seen or even mentioned again.

===Episode #13: ''Smashed Hearts & Entrapment''===

==[[Sonichu 6|''Sonichu'' #6]]==
===Episode #12.5: ''One Lucky Dog''===
* Chris resurrects his pet dog. In-story she merely turned from a dog into a magical talking dog, but Chris doesn't hide what he's really doing. Regardless of how many people die in the comic's pages--from innocent bystanders, to victims of circumstance, to real-life gal pals--CWC has only extended this mercy [[Simonla Rosechu|once more.]]
* With the introduction of [[Allison Amber]], it becomes obvious that even in his fantasy world, Chris is too lazy to do any of his mayoral duties that won't help him look cool or punish his enemies. What's more, an unelected city employee way down the chain of command has been promoted to Vice Mayor, although we were led to believe [[Women's rights|she was just an overpowered secretary]] for a long time. Allison performs almost literally all of Chris's mayoral duties, which is [[Chris and the law|highly illegal]] because she doesn't have the relevant authority.

===Episode #14: ''Evil is Afoot!''===
* Allowing his [[Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc|defeated enemy]] mercy and attentive medical treatment is probably the most uncharacteristically nice thing Chris does in this comic. Unfortunately, the magnanimity of this gesture is ruined by the fact that there's absolutely no security in Reldnahc's room during his convalescence, leaving Chris's arch-nemesis free to just ''walk out of the hospital''.

==[[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]==
===Episode #15: Sonichu, Magi-Chan, and Christian in ''Time for a Ball''===
* [[Bionic]] (Chris's first bastard child) makes the highly progressive assumption that [[Third date|women always put out after the third date]].
* Chris and Magi-Chan introduce a convenient [[Chris and writing|plot device]] to help them solve their seemingly nonexistent problems. The question here is that if they knew about them this whole time, why wait until now to 'search' for them? Chris could have easily used them in the past to stop [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|villains]] in the past, yet decided to postpone it to the point where it would cost [[Ivy|countless]] [[Pandahalo|lives]].

===Episode #16: C.W.C. and Sonichu in ''Time Hogs''===
* Sonichu and Magi-Chan are too busy discussing [[Hanky panky|sex]] to realize that Chris has been flung out of the time sphere, giving no thought to helping him. Magi-Chan should have been able to sense it telepathically or whatever.

===''Tune in Everyday to Station KCWC for Everything!''===

==[[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]]==
[[Image:Bigboss.JPG|thumb|What does your existentialist philosophy say about FURRY FACE RAPE, Jason?]]
===Episode #17: ''Rage against the Garbage''===
* Rosechu is so ignorant about how the Internet and [[troll]]ing works that she thinks that taking nudes of herself is going to overwhelm the flow of [[Rosechu#Transgender Drama|shemale]] pictures. Amusingly, this is one of the few instances where a protagonist is immediately broken of their delusions.
* Sonichu, Wild, and Rosechu plot burglary without even ''trying'' to negotiate for the Sonichu Balls. As far as we know, Jason is the rightful owner and Sonichu's crew are a bunch of thieves.
* Wild's family is harassed by arsonists and his father is kidnapped by poachers but the putative Mayor clearly can't be bothered to stop stuffing his face with chicken nuggets long enough to take care of the problem.
* For that matter, Wild couldn't even be assed to look for his own damn father himself. Even if he was still too weak to mount a solo rescue, at this point in the comic he knows at least ten other characters with powers similar or superior to his own and has no excuse for not resuming his quest. Then again, Wild probably knew that his 'friends' were too self-absorbed to give a shit about anyone else anyway. Hell, Sonichu and Rosechu couldn't be bothered to do anything more than go 'oh, that sucks' at Wild's tearjerker.
* Sonichu, Rosechu, and Wild very stupidly schedule the latter's infiltration at the same time as their meeting with the owner of 4-cent garbage. Jason knows that they will be here, so why would they undertake this dangerous and important mission when he's on alert? Then again, Wild doesn't meet any resistance more stringent than a locked safe so it doesn't matter anyway.
* On several floors, Sonichu, Rosechu, and even Chris physically attack people whose only crime is uploading pictures to the Internet.
* Jason Kendrick Howell flat-out admits that he owns an [[Kathleen|underage sex slave]] that he does illegal things with. Sonichu and Rosechu can't even give the tiniest of shits about this grievous affront to human dignity. They're only concerned about Rosechu being drawn with a penis.
* After Jason taunts Sonichu and Rosechu, both attack him and in the latter's case attempts to rape/kill him. Jason only survives thanks to dark forces keeping him alive.
* The 19th Amendment, securing the right of women to vote, apparently doesn't [[Chris and sexism|apply to CWCVille]]. You know, a city supposedly existing within the borders of the United States.
* Rosechu thinks that laws preventing a 14-year old from being able to [[pedofork|assist in nude protests]] are "dumb".

===Episode #18: ''Spring Break 2008''===
* The protagonists are overly quick to forgive Blake. Granted, being a [[The Adventures of The American Rabbit|Saturday morning cartoon villain]], his villainy hasn't exceeded 'kidnap Rosechu and get <s>his</s> her teeth knocked out' -- a far cry from the mass murders the heroes cause in Sonichu 10 to be sure. Nonetheless, it's still dumb for the other protagonists to implicitly trust someone who was only a few months ago working for [[Robotnik|two]] of the [[Giovanni|biggest criminals]] on the planet.
* Bubbles is astonishingly stupid and careless when dealing with Silvana-Blake. Despite getting two credible warnings from Magi-Chan and Jiggliami/Blake that she was about to fuck an impostor, she's still not convinced.
* Blake has more of an excuse than Bubbles than his actions, but wasn't he the tiniest bit suspicious that Bubbles aborted her mission in order to have nasty furry jungle sex?

==[[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]]==
===Episode #19: ''Date Ed (Even Though the Idea Sounds Dated)''===
* This is not the heroes' fault, but the [[Dating Education]] class is mind-meltingly idiotic. The coursework is piss-easy what with fifty-word essays, the IM portion being unsupervised, and an enormous douche like Reginald almost getting a perfect score. If the characters had an ounce of self-respect they would have dropped this worthless class by day two and demanded their money back.
* [[Ivy]] refuses to pair up with anyone because she is holding out for Chris, despite this nominally being just practice. Since the class has equal amounts of boys and girls, this means George Philip, the boy she got paired up with, is being screwed over. Somehow, Ivy still gets a 99% in the class.
* The heroes apparently have trouble discerning the identities of people with extremely obvious screen names, which doesn't speak well of their intelligence. Gee, I wonder who [[Simonla Rosechu|DigDugette416]] could be?
* [[Reginald Sneasel]] is, and let's be frank here, a ''[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|fulminating asshole]]''. Reginald lets down his IM partner and classmate FlorDora217 because of his [[Layla]] obsession, intentionally spreads scurrilous rumors about her, sabotages school equipment, and stalks the two on their date. By contrast, Punchy decides to cooperate with Layla and tries to keep an open mind about her despite also having his eye on [[Angelica Rosechu|someone else]], foils Reginald's cunning plan with his counter-gambit of 'have his [[Wild Sonichu|best buddy]] ask Layla directly', and acts like a perfect gentleman on his date. How sad is it that you come off as more of a jerk than a sex-crazed, [[Punchy and Layla's Dance In The Dark|sadomasochistic]] Knuckles headswap? This wouldn't be so bad if Reginald was set up to be the typical jealous-yet-hapless rival suitor that potboiler romantic comedies thrive upon, but given his fate in this episode and the rest of [[Sonichu 9]], he's clearly meant to be a ''sympathetic character''.
* Ms. Jackaras just abruptly dies halfway through the narrative and nobody even reacts except her sister, who replaces her instantly for some reason. Her sister mourns for precisely one panel.

===Episode #20: ''CWC-Defense''===
* Sonichu gets a glimpse of his wife's panties while she's doing laundry and turns into a drooling pervert. Very classy of you, sweet-bolt.
* Sonichu goes on an unprompted, uncomfortably long homophobic tirade that makes him look violent and psychopathic, complete with breaking the couple's property.
* Why hasn't CWCville elected or at least appointed a new interim mayor yet? It's been several months since Chris was trapped in the time void, and there's no reason to think that he'll be back anytime soon, or even at all at this point. Again, the city is forced to dump way too many important decisions on an over-promoted secretary. This gets discussed further in the next section.
* Prower can transform into a [[media:Prowl_prower.jpg|giant robot]] and was very close-by, yet he failed to help Punchy and Layla when they were surrounded by [[Jerkop]]s. Punchy was able to take care of himself, but Layla was clearly unused to fighting and almost got her head handed to her.
* CWCVille's hapless defenders are completely blindsided by the [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|PVCC]], sending their [[Chaotic Combo|heavy-hitters]] on wild goose chases all around the city while apparently not thinking to leave the [[CWCville Shopping Center]], the seat of the municipal government and the main target of the invasion, with any better defenders than [[Zapina Rosechu|a skanky tween girl]] and a [[Patti-Chan|half-naked zombie dog]].
* When the combined forces of Sonic recolors and Autobot rejects prove to be inadequate for defending the city, [[Allison Amber]] doesn't even bother to let the media know, let alone try to get assistance. Bionic and Darkbind for instance, only realize what's going on as the conflict starts spilling out past the city borders.
* Even if Chris is the one fated to [[Anchuent Prophecy|personally stop Graduon and Walsh]], there's still no reason for Sonichu to just let her fly away and regroup, especially when he literally had her at arms' length and in a position to easily capture or otherwise finish off.
* After the battle is over, the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon show basically no concern about [[Chris and death|the destruction that has befallen their city]].

==[[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]]==
[[File:SandyKiller.JPG|thumb|Having a little girl torture her [[Evan|grandpa]]? Totally normal behavior from your heroes!]]
===Episode #21: ''Christian Chandler in Director Amenities''===
* The amount of sheer evil the "protagonists" exhibit in this issue clearly shows their transition from [[Blake|bumbling yet harmless goons]] to [[The Incredible Lioness|terrifyingly violent and sadistic psychopaths]]. From [[Lovely Weather#Deception|rape by deception]] to [[Sonichu_10#Curing_Da_Homos|genocide]], this issue has it all.
* Chris poisons the planet's water supplies with his "[[Homos|straight]]" blood, thereby initiating a genocide against homosexuals, bisexuals and asexuals worldwide. Aside from being ethically perverse, this scheme shows an [[honor roll|inexcusable ignorance of simple science]]. Those few crates would barely be enough to infect a modern city's water supply for a few days, let alone worldwide. Transferring a vaccine through the water supply is also ludicrous; not only would the treatment facilities dilute and kill the immunizing vectors, blood-stomach ingestion is one of the weakest ways to transmit a disease.
* Chris ''{{w|Rape by deception|rapes}}'' his future self's wife by [[Liquid Chris|pretending to be his future self]].
* Chris blows up a building filled with "devil [[trolls]]", sealing it up beforehand as well to ensure that none can escape as he does so.
* Chris (by now you're probably realizing it's almost ''all'' Chris) breaks [[Jimmy Hill|a man]]'s [[Fangs|teeth]] because he [[Parody|parodied]] him.
* Chris violently injects his own blood into his [[Reldnahc|nemesis]], in some sort of harebrained scheme to turn him straight.
* Chris then teleports Reldnahc straight into the domicile of Kel without so much as a trial or medical examination, under the excuse that his evil behavior was due to his recent transformation into an evil homosexual hedgehog. Though stripped of his [[Anchuent Prophecy]]-granted powers, Reldnahc was already on the side of the bad guys before his transformation. Thus Chris just delivered a world-class Pokémon trainer working for one of the biggest criminal organizations straight into the arms of one of his unsuspecting friends!
* Chris and the [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys|Hedgehog Boys]] destroy a populated high-rise building, killing and injuring hundreds of innocent people in an act of extreme [[Twin Falling Towers|terrorism]], because they drew pictures of his imaginary friends with [[Pickles|pee-pees]].
* Chris punches someone in the face hard enough to knock out his teeth, for sardonically referring to him as 'miss'.
* Chris and Sonichu trespass in [[Apologies to Alec and Evan|Alec Benson's Leary - Alec Benson's... Try saying that three times fast with plurals. Heh.]] Chris and Sonichu trespass in [[Alec Benson Leary|Alec's]] house, before Chris destroys all of his computer data and then the computer itself.
* Chris and Sonichu then [[Chris and copyright|plagiarize]] all of Alec's [[True and honest|TRUE and HONEST]] creations, followed by having them beat the shit out of Alec and accusing him of keeping [[Rape|female prisoners]] in his basement.
* [[Collosal Chan]] breaks into an [[Mary Lee Walsh|old woman]]'s house completely unprovoked, and brutally attacks her to the extent of causing permanent paralysis, before having her stripped of her powers and sent to a maximum security prison with no trial.
* Collosal Chan also willingly smashes the staff [[Count Graduon]] is sealed in and releases him at Mary's request, so she can "punish [Graduon] another day."
* Magi-chan shows no sympathy for Silvana's literal emasculation. To be fair, Silvana being gender-changed against her will (she refused a previous offer) is an unavoidable side-effect of stopping the mad [[Count Graduon]], but that's no reason for him to be so gleeful about it.
* Magi-Chan, the inhuman monster he is, informs [[Sandy|an infant]] only minutes old that her mother was murdered by '[[Evan]]'. That's right, even infancy doesn't get you out of your duties as Chris's personal bodyguard.
* Chris and his [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|corrupted officials]] have a show trial for [[Asperpedia|four innocent men]], before having them sentenced to death, with little to no evidence against them.
* Chris and his entourage, including a one-week-old girl and a [[Kel|preteen]], brutally execute four people in violent and inhumane ways. Remember, this is a comic Chris [[Chris and censorship|claims is aimed at children]].
* Chris disrespects [[Wikipedia:Flag Day in Mexico|a national holiday]] by being an [[Chris and his ego|egotistical]] jackass.

==[[Sonichu 11|''Sonichu'' #11]]==

===''Episode #22: A Sonichu Christmas''===

-WIP-
* Cerah makes a big deal about making a special cookie for a Jewish kid named Kevin in an uncomfortably awkward attempt at sensitivity. The cookie, made in the vague shape of a candle, bears no resemblance to any Jewish symbol. The cookie is vanilla-flavored, in case the kid has some kind of food allergy. Rosechu and Cerah do not consider that anyone other than Jews might have food allergies.

===''Episode #23: Simonchu & Bananafunkle''===

* When Simonchu returns to see his sister, he is met with extreme hostility by both Sandy and Wild, with Sandy threatening to use Horn Drill to kill him and Wild even knocking him unconscious on sight. It's only until after Simonla shouts at them do they back down. It should also be made note of that [[Retroactive continuity in Sonichu|since Simonla never died]], neither Wild nor Sandy have any reason to act as violently as they do.
* After an intense night of fucking, [[Reginald Sneasel]] evolves into a Weavile and proceeds to destroy everything in the church. When Angelica wakes and finds him, he says he's too far gone as some sort of monster. Later in the episode, he hooks up with [[Layla]] and seems to have full control over his new form. It should be known that [[Chris and Writing|Weavile don't become more vicious upon evolving]], so that means that Reginald effectively used his evolution as an easy way out after ripping apart Angelica's church and breaking up with her.
* Simonchu apparently discovers a fossil of an undocumented Pokémon, which has been brought back to life. Said Pokémon also apparently used to be human high school senior and was hit by a car before being brought back as a new Pokémon... [[Chris and Writing|somehow]]. Rather then give it to proper researchers of the field for further study, Simonchu dumps it on [[Punchy Sonichu]] because he's apparently the only one who can understand it.
* Punchy agreeing to bring [[Bananasauros]] to his home to live with him wouldn't be all too terrible... if Layla, his girlfriend, wasn't ''also'' living with him. And of course, he didn't call ahead to say he was bringing company; let alone some weird banana dinosaur.
* While Bananasauros is effectively an animal who has little control over the situation, he is fully aware that him being there is straining Punchy and Layla's relationship. He doesn't bring it up or care, instead mooching off of Punchy's welfare and just sitting on the couch and gaming. In the end, Layla does indeed move out, and he shows no remorse for causing it.
* For the sake of science and research, Punchy gets Bananasauros to fuck a Ditto to make some eggs. Remember that this is a human mind inside of a dinosaur banana's body, being forced to have sex for whatever the hell species he is now.
* Before leaving, Layla flat-out punches Bananasauros in the face. While Layla has every right to be angry at Bananasauros, he'd done nothing to instigate that.

===''The Clip Show: Catching Up''===

==[[Sonichu 12]]==
===Episode 24, Part 2: The Clip Show: Catching Up===
*Sonichu has a dream where Rosechu and Chris are both trapped in a fire, and he only has time to save one of them. If he saves Chris, then Rosechu will die, and Sonichu won't be able to live without her. If he saves Rosechu, then Chris will die, and CWCville will have no mayor and cease to exist, <s>killing everyone in it</s> leaving everyone "lost in a void forever". Sonichu then saves Rosechu, abandoning everyone to their fate for the sake of someone who, for the record, will die anyway as a result of his own actions.

==''Sonichu'' Specials==
* In ''[[Sonichu Special 4]]'', Chris decides to take matters into his own hands rather than contacting the local police and/or sending in an ally that could get to [[Kacey]]'s [[Liquid Chris|kidnapper]]'s location faster than he could driving at the speed limit.
* After Chris disarms and wristlocks the kidnapper, Chris intentionally trips him and shoots him in each knee. This is at the very least maiming; Chris is fortunate that his opponent survived to star in [[Episode 20|CWC Defense]], otherwise he'd be facing charges of 2nd or even 1st degree murder. Or not, since CWCVille is effectively an absolute monarchy; Chris rules with undefined power and is of course above the law.

==[[Mailbag]]==
* One needs to read [[Mailbag 5#Chris does not know what "benevolent" means, or how government works|Mailbag 5]] in conjunction with [[Sonichu 10]] to really grasp the scope of this problem, but the CWCVille municipal government is extremely flawed. There are at least three major problems with the administration: the first is that after being thrown into the [[Time Void]], an interim mayor should have been appointed from the city council's ranks if Chris was going to be gone for so long. Who this would be varies depending on the city's charter but this person is typically the chief administrator officer -- which for a city of CWCVille's size would be an elected position (and not Allison Amber) unless the democratic trappings are even more of a sham than we thought. The second is that we never actually see them doing any work. Why, for example, was city defense left (again) to Allison Amber instead of the chief of police? The third is that the city council didn't do anything to stop or inform others Chris's plan to commit mass murder despite him flat-out telling them; even an amateur paralegal would be able to get charges of conspiracy and accessory to murder to stick.
* In gross violation of the 1st, 4th, 5th, and 14th Amendments of the U.S. Constitution Chris reveals that [[Mailbag_31#Magi-Chan_knows_when_you_fuck|Magi-chan is engaged in psychic surveillance on CWCVille's populace]] to ensure that homosexuality is - as it in the author's own mind - thoroughly suppressed.

==See Also==
*[[Chris and writing]]
*[[CWCVille]] - For a more in-depth analysis of the various municipal failings of [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu's]] primary setting.

{{Sonichu}}
[[Category:Comic]][[Category:Lists]][[Category:Villains]]

List of unheroic protagonist actions

2025-05-12T07:10:50Z

Alan Pardew: /* Sonichu #0 */

{{Incomplete}}

A recurring tragicomic element of ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' is how Chris [[Chris and writing|''tries'' to characterize]] the protagonists of his comic as [[Rollin' and Trollin'|badass]], [[Honor roll|insightful]], and [[Holding out for a hero|heroic]] yet instead unfailingly depicts his heroes as [[media:SchuComic9P37.jpg|immature]], [[:File:Sonichu - Episode 7, Page 4.jpg|maladroit]], and at times nigh on [[media:SchuComic10P35.jpg|morally bankrupt]]. Over time, the characters have engaged in enough unintentional buffoonery and villainy to easily fill an entire '''list of unheroic protagonist actions'''. While any protagonist [[Collosal Chan|worth reading about]] will have some flaws, from [[Donald Duck impersonation|Donald Duck]]'s temper to [[Sonic the Hedgehog]]'s hyperactivity, the number of vices the Sonichu characters possess are too numerable to shrug them off as portrayals of [[Liquid Chris|flawed but ultimately heroic]] characters, but rather show them as [[Ian Brandon Anderson|obliviously yet undeniably evil]].

==Recurring Shenanigans==
[[Image:Megatron_pistol2.jpg|thumb|This is neither [[Jerkhief|the first]] nor the [[Mary Lee Walsh|last time]] Chris further abuses [[Sonichu Special 4|a defeated opponent.]]]]
* The [[Pokémon]] in this series often are at least as intelligent as human beings, yet various humans tote and order them around as personal servants. This was a problem with the original series as well, but Chris doesn't even attempt to address this issue in his comic. This creates stupidity like the comic finding nothing wrong with Trainer [[Kel]] pimping out her Dragonite to slake Rosechu's lust while simultaneously finding it unremarkable that [[Kevin_the_Jew|human children can date Pokémon]].
* The protagonists are completely submissive to their raging libidos. The characters are extremely quick to hop in the sack with whoever strikes their fancy, often having known their partners for mere days or even ''hours'' beforehand. Aside from showing a lack of self-control, their hypersexuality has directly led the protagonists into danger. They tend to become uncontrollably aroused at the drop of a hat, even in the middle of an invasion of their precious city or confronting their adversaries. Needless to say, it's all very telling of the author's own [[Chris and sex|twisted views on sex and relationships]].
* The characters are overly vindictive when they have any sort of advantage over their foes. [[Manajerks#Merried_Seinor_Comic.2FKirby|Mutilation]], [[Jason Kendrick Howell|sexual assault]], and of course [[4-cent_garbage.com|mass]] [[Sonichu 9|murder]] are always on the table no matter how mildly they were originally antagonised. This is in marked contrast to the basic morality of any [[The Adventures of The American Rabbit|non-ironic]] [[Sonic the Hedgehog|hero]], where instigating or escalating a fight or seeking any revenge past what's necessary to stop a villain from committing crimes is a huge no-no.
* The heroes show absolutely no aptitude for any fighting strategy that's not 'run up to the bad guy and use superpowers until they stop'. They're unable to anticipate [[Silvana|special techniques]] or [[Dark Mirror Hole|strategies]] from their foes, have trouble doing basic coordination of attacks (unless it's to gang up on Black Sonichu), and can't perform any combat feats not constrained in the paradigm of plot-device items or the narrow application of Pokémon moves.
* [[CWCVille]]'s "government" is a nightmarish monstrosity of human rights violations and poor resource allocation that, unsurprisingly, fails to provide basic safety for its citizens. By far the most popular stock parody of Chris's work is to depict the city as a Kafkaesque dystopia that only exists to fulfill the puerile whims of its dictator-for-life mayor. What's more, this only requires a ''slight'' exaggeration of CWCVille's unsavory traits. None of the heroes, of course, have a problem with how CWCville is run, and in fact are shown to be the mayor's cronies, with complete immunity from the law, and receive free houses, credit cards and other gifts from the mayor, not unlike Soviet nomenklatura.
* Fight scenes involving the main characters often have them beating up [[jerkop|jerkops]], innocent, mentally handicapped people who've been brainwashed into becoming [[Mary Lee Walsh]]'s evil minions. It's not until ''Sonichu #9'' that anybody even tries to cure them of their brainwashing. Even then, it's explicitly mentioned that the "heroes" have killed several jerkops, knowing full well they are victims rather than villains.

==[[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]]==
[[Image:SchuComic1.jpg|thumb|"Hee Hee!"]]
===Episode #1: Sonichu's Origin===
* Sonic just sort of disappears after crashing into Pikachu, and takes the credit for Sonichu's fight against the Perfect Chaos Monster. Sonichu isn't bothered by this and even names himself after the guy who ran him over and immediately abdicated an important battle.
===Episode #2: Sonichu in 'Genesis of the Lovehogs'===
* Sonichu stalks Rosechu to her home and spies on her through the window rather than introducing himself to her like a normal person.
* Kel straight-up pimps out her Pokémon to each other. To be fair, this happens in the video games, but it's rather jarring to see outside of a game mechanics context.
===Episode #3: Sonichu vs. Naitsirhc===
* [[Giovanni]]'s son [[Naitsirhc]] is shown to have ''at least'' two Legendary Pokémon (Zapdos and Raikou) and sports even more in the team Chris describes him having. Combined with how no trainers from the video games or the anime appear in the series, this places ''Sonichu'' in a grimdark world where Team Rocket was victorious over Ash and friends, whose bodies are presumably decaying in shallow graves somewhere outside Saffron City. That, or for whatever reason, the heroes are simply not doing anything to stop Team Rocket from holding power over the world, which while less grim, is no less questionable from an ethical standpoint.

===Classic Sonichu Strips===
* [[Vamprosa|Rosechu]], a protagonist, is shown as a vampire, an undead monster that sustains its existence by draining the blood of others.
* When the comic was originally written, no reason was given in the fiction for Chris and Sonichu to attack [[Mary Lee Walsh]]. She is not depicted as doing anything more evil than merely ''existing'' and saying "Hee Hee" and "Want a girlfriend? Tough lightning!"
* No reason is given as to why Chris and Sonichu only get one shot at defeating Mary Lee Walsh. If they had missed, would they simply have left Mary to do whatever presumably evil thing she was doing?
* Rosechu does nothing but look on and say "Oh no!" while Chris is being beaten by Mary Lee Walsh's mecha-Jerkops, despite supposedly having equal power to Sonichu.

==[[Sonichu 1|''Sonichu'' #1]]==
===Episode #4: Black Sonichu in ''Darkness, Speed, & Lightning!''===
* Did Giovanni snip off Black Sonichu's balls like a naughty poodle after he mildly sassed his son? Chris-chan sets up a potentially interesting plot twist -- a clone pretends fealty to their evil creators only to bide his time and betray them -- but then takes his sweet time resolving this subplot while Blachu sublimates his role as the villains' bitch. If Black Sonichu realized that he was forcefed a pack of bullshit and propaganda, why did he cheerfully go along with his handlers for so long before joining the forces of "good"?

===Episode #5: Sonichu in ''Informal Meeting''===
* A map of the area on page twelve shows that Sonic lives fairly close to Giovanni's undisguised headquarters. Why Sonic remained oblivious of and/or ignored the existence of Pokémon's biggest villain for so long is an exercise left to the reader.

===Episode #6: Sonic and Sonichu in ''Black Metal Combat''===
* This issue is the first to show Chris's curious habit of having a character with explicitly better superpowers than their opponent or ally being totally outclassed, i.e. Sonichu's dismal performance versus Sonic the Hedgehog's unstoppable rampage, Bionic contemptuously dispatching Reldnahc, Wes-Li effortlessly beating up Chris-chan, etc. While this is a common theme in fiction to show that you can't always brute force your way through problems and that cunning, strategy, and determination can triumph over raw power, this dissonance seems to happen in Sonichu simply for the sake of making the antagonists look a bit less impotent than they really are. Due to Chris's predictable and boring style of writing, the villains are almost invariably defeated and subsequently cast aside when they and the protagonists next meet.
* Sonic, a seasoned superhero, not only lets the much more inexperienced Sonichu go in ahead of him but does so even after suspecting that they're walking into a trap. Letting Sonichu take point and even springing the aforementioned trap without so much as a warning was pretty weaselly on Sonic's part.
* After a long and arduous battle complete with SONIC SPEED and ZAPPING TO THE EXTREME, Sonichu, Sonic, and Rosechu finally have two globally infamous criminals cornered. And... the comic just forgets about them in lieu of a shopping spree at the [[CWCville Shopping Center]].

==[[Sonichu 2|''Sonichu'' #2]]==
===Episode #7: Sonichu in ''Anchuent Prophecy''===
* Wes and Sarah get personal training in how to use their hedgehog powers from the spirits of ''their'' ancestors; Chris isn't so lucky. The [[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan]] is more than happy to leave Chris to fend for himself. To his credit, Sonichu does at least help Chris get elementary training. Nonetheless, the clan leader's selective neglect of his disciple leaves Chris unaware of at [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|least]] two [[Sonichu 4#Sub-Episode 8: Christian Chandler in "Off-Target Part 2"|superpowers]] that would've made things a lot easier on Chris. Not that he needs ''more'' deus ex machinas in his corner, but still.

===Episode #8: Christian Chandler in ''Chaos & Serenity''===
* Sonichu disappears for a large portion of the battle between Wes and Chris-Chan for no good reason. Considering that Wes was trying to kill Sonichu's "father", his help would've been much appreciated.
* After Wes goes on for some time about why he's behaving evilly, Chris goes on a [[ego|self-aggrandizing]] rant and tries to paint himself as an innocent victim in the love triangle, rather than trying to negotiate with Wes or calm him down. Chris clearly is more concerned about his own [[ego]] than getting his and Wes's shit together to fulfill the [[Anchuent Prophecy]].
* Sarah, despite being told that her role in the upcoming events was to be a peacemaker between the other two humans-turned-hedgehog, decides not to intervene until her partners almost kill each other.
* Chris gets his ass kicked in less than a page by Wes in spite of having more and better superpowers than his rival.

===Episode #9: Chris-Chan, Saramah, & Wes-Li in ''The Evil that Stomped CWCville''===
* Sarah very stupidly decides to dump Wes Iseli right before the prophesied evil takes place, causing Wes's [[heart level]] to collapse right before the fated battle with [[Mary Lee Walsh]] and [[Count Graduon]]. To be fair, you could argue that it wouldn't be right to romantically string someone along just to cajole them into doing the right thing... except that she had no problem inflicting this sneaky tactic on ''Chris'' at the end of the issue.

==[[Sonichu 3|''Sonichu'' #3]]==
===Episode #10: ''Sonichu Babies''===
* Punchy unambiguously murders [[Mypoe]].
* That said, as much as we wish agony and woe on those obnoxious [[Sonee & Rosey|Sonees and Roseys]], Punchy's violent reaction to Mypoe ''mutilating him shortly after his birth'' is completely understandable. The real question is this: what kind of dojo is Shinabe running here?
* Unless he has one hell of an explanation for his actions, Mewtwo stole Magi-chan's childhood and sculpted him into the borderline-[[autism|autistic]] he is today for his own reasons. [[Chris and writing|Not that we'll]] [[Sonichu 11|ever know these reasons]].

===Episode #11: The Chaotic Combo in ''When Hedgehogs Meet''===
* Why is something as powerful and calamitous as the [[Legendary Master Sunstone]] just sitting out in the open, guarded solely by a powerless [[Flame the Sunbird|parrot]]? At the very least it should be placed somewhere hidden. Then again, the Sunstone ceases to become an issue after this comic so maybe the mayor did something smart for once and squirreled it [[List of things Chris has shoved up his ass|someplace more secure]].
* Speaking of [[Flame the Sunbird]], he's only able to fly for about 20 miles (the distance between the shores to where Bubbles is) before being winded. For a bird, especially one that's a self-styled guardian, this is a pathetic level of physical fitness.
* Every single member of the Chaotic Combo pile on Black Sonichu at the end and just beat him to a bloody pulp. While he overpowered them one on one, Black Sonichu getting dogpiled by half a dozen mutants and left bleeding and disfigured doesn't exactly suggest an even fight between a team of heroes and a powerful villain. Besides, Black Sonichu didn't even mean to aggravate them.

==[[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu'' #4]]==
* Chris refuses to leave every time he's called out for soliciting sex.
* Chris [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|curses]] a [[Jerkhief|man]], making him lose his wife, kids, and home, all because he was told not to stand around like a [[Creepy stare|creep]].
* Chris throws a [[Chris and anger|temper tantrum]] because a [[Hanna|girl]] played a prank on him.
* Chris breaks into an [[Mary Lee Walsh|old woman's]] home (not the [[Sonichu 0|first time]] nor the [[Sonichu 10|last]]) completely unprovoked and beats the shit out of her.
* Chris's self-insert fails, forcing Chris's other [[Sonichu (character)|self-insert]] to help his sorry ass.
* Chris and his [[Sonichu (character)|bastard son]] brutally murder a defenseless old woman in cold blood.
* Chris and [[Darkbind Sonichu|another one of his recolors]] injure [[B-Manajerk|two]] [[Merried Seinor Comic|people]] for asking him to leave the store.
* Chris and his [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|emotionless fuck-buddy]] decapitate [[W-M-Manajerk|someone]] for telling him to leave. Granted, said person's head could be removed more-or-less unharmed, but football-kicking it into an old woman's face afterward pushes it right into one of these.
* Chris makes fun of [[Slow-in-the-minds|mentally handicapped people]].
* Chris and his [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|personified sexual insecurity]] beat the shit out of [[Bagget|some]] [[Mary Lee Walsh|more]] [[Count Graduon|people]] for (and you're not going to guess this) telling him to leave a [[Get-Tar Region|store]].

==[[Sonichu 5|''Sonichu'' #5]]==
===Episode #12: Christian Chandler in ''My Best Friend's Cherokian Wedding''===
* Chris is invisibly spying on the wedding. Meaning that he wasn't invited and decided to just [[The GAMe PLACe|show up anyway]] or that he was but just [[The Tale Of The Crazy Pacer|likes creeping around for no reason]].
* What exactly was stopping Chris from deploying another Trap Card, or at the very least, warning the crowd when he realized that his reasoning wasn't getting through? Innocent bystanders might have gotten hurt or even killed.
* With all of the craziness that happens in CWCVille, Sarah Spicer was careless to not have her lightning bracelets at arms length whether or not they clashed with her wedding gown. Chris evidently believes women care more about matching their outfits than about protecting the people they love. Also, why couldn't she just get a gown that didn't clash?
* Boy, those [[Yu-Gi-Oh!]] cards sure came in handy this chapter and previously in episode #8. All of those versatile, powerful, yet easily-deployable effects should make protecting CWCVille and saving innocents a breeze! Too bad Chris lost interest in the franchise after this issue, so they'll never be seen or even mentioned again.

===Episode #13: ''Smashed Hearts & Entrapment''===

==[[Sonichu 6|''Sonichu'' #6]]==
===Episode #12.5: ''One Lucky Dog''===
* Chris resurrects his pet dog. In-story she merely turned from a dog into a magical talking dog, but Chris doesn't hide what he's really doing. Regardless of how many people die in the comic's pages--from innocent bystanders, to victims of circumstance, to real-life gal pals--CWC has only extended this mercy [[Simonla Rosechu|once more.]]
* With the introduction of [[Allison Amber]], it becomes obvious that even in his fantasy world, Chris is too lazy to do any of his mayoral duties that won't help him look cool or punish his enemies. What's more, an unelected city employee way down the chain of command has been promoted to Vice Mayor, although we were led to believe [[Women's rights|she was just an overpowered secretary]] for a long time. Allison performs almost literally all of Chris's mayoral duties, which is [[Chris and the law|highly illegal]] because she doesn't have the relevant authority.

===Episode #14: ''Evil is Afoot!''===
* Allowing his [[Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc|defeated enemy]] mercy and attentive medical treatment is probably the most uncharacteristically nice thing Chris does in this comic. Unfortunately, the magnanimity of this gesture is ruined by the fact that there's absolutely no security in Reldnahc's room during his convalescence, leaving Chris's arch-nemesis free to just ''walk out of the hospital''.

==[[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]==
===Episode #15: Sonichu, Magi-Chan, and Christian in ''Time for a Ball''===
* [[Bionic]] (Chris's first bastard child) makes the highly progressive assumption that [[Third date|women always put out after the third date]].
* Chris and Magi-Chan introduce a convenient [[Chris and writing|plot device]] to help them solve their seemingly nonexistent problems. The question here is that if they knew about them this whole time, why wait until now to 'search' for them? Chris could have easily used them in the past to stop [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|villains]] in the past, yet decided to postpone it to the point where it would cost [[Ivy|countless]] [[Pandahalo|lives]].

===Episode #16: C.W.C. and Sonichu in ''Time Hogs''===
* Sonichu and Magi-Chan are too busy discussing [[Hanky panky|sex]] to realize that Chris has been flung out of the time sphere, giving no thought to helping him. Magi-Chan should have been able to sense it telepathically or whatever.

===''Tune in Everyday to Station KCWC for Everything!''===

==[[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]]==
[[Image:Bigboss.JPG|thumb|What does your existentialist philosophy say about FURRY FACE RAPE, Jason?]]
===Episode #17: ''Rage against the Garbage''===
* Rosechu is so ignorant about how the Internet and [[troll]]ing works that she thinks that taking nudes of herself is going to overwhelm the flow of [[Rosechu#Transgender Drama|shemale]] pictures. Amusingly, this is one of the few instances where a protagonist is immediately broken of their delusions.
* Sonichu, Wild, and Rosechu plot burglary without even ''trying'' to negotiate for the Sonichu Balls. As far as we know, Jason is the rightful owner and Sonichu's crew are a bunch of thieves.
* Wild's family is harassed by arsonists and his father is kidnapped by poachers but the putative Mayor clearly can't be bothered to stop stuffing his face with chicken nuggets long enough to take care of the problem.
* For that matter, Wild couldn't even be assed to look for his own damn father himself. Even if he was still too weak to mount a solo rescue, at this point in the comic he knows at least ten other characters with powers similar or superior to his own and has no excuse for not resuming his quest. Then again, Wild probably knew that his 'friends' were too self-absorbed to give a shit about anyone else anyway. Hell, Sonichu and Rosechu couldn't be bothered to do anything more than go 'oh, that sucks' at Wild's tearjerker.
* Sonichu, Rosechu, and Wild very stupidly schedule the latter's infiltration at the same time as their meeting with the owner of 4-cent garbage. Jason knows that they will be here, so why would they undertake this dangerous and important mission when he's on alert? Then again, Wild doesn't meet any resistance more stringent than a locked safe so it doesn't matter anyway.
* On several floors, Sonichu, Rosechu, and even Chris physically attack people whose only crime is uploading pictures to the Internet.
* Jason Kendrick Howell flat-out admits that he owns an [[Kathleen|underage sex slave]] that he does illegal things with. Sonichu and Rosechu can't even give the tiniest of shits about this grievous affront to human dignity. They're only concerned about Rosechu being drawn with a penis.
* After Jason taunts Sonichu and Rosechu, both attack him and in the latter's case attempts to rape/kill him. Jason only survives thanks to dark forces keeping him alive.
* The 19th Amendment, securing the right of women to vote, apparently doesn't [[Chris and sexism|apply to CWCVille]]. You know, a city supposedly existing within the borders of the United States.
* Rosechu thinks that laws preventing a 14-year old from being able to [[pedofork|assist in nude protests]] are "dumb".

===Episode #18: ''Spring Break 2008''===
* The protagonists are overly quick to forgive Blake. Granted, being a [[The Adventures of The American Rabbit|Saturday morning cartoon villain]], his villainy hasn't exceeded 'kidnap Rosechu and get <s>his</s> her teeth knocked out' -- a far cry from the mass murders the heroes cause in Sonichu 10 to be sure. Nonetheless, it's still dumb for the other protagonists to implicitly trust someone who was only a few months ago working for [[Robotnik|two]] of the [[Giovanni|biggest criminals]] on the planet.
* Bubbles is astonishingly stupid and careless when dealing with Silvana-Blake. Despite getting two credible warnings from Magi-Chan and Jiggliami/Blake that she was about to fuck an impostor, she's still not convinced.
* Blake has more of an excuse than Bubbles than his actions, but wasn't he the tiniest bit suspicious that Bubbles aborted her mission in order to have nasty furry jungle sex?

==[[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]]==
===Episode #19: ''Date Ed (Even Though the Idea Sounds Dated)''===
* This is not the heroes' fault, but the [[Dating Education]] class is mind-meltingly idiotic. The coursework is piss-easy what with fifty-word essays, the IM portion being unsupervised, and an enormous douche like Reginald almost getting a perfect score. If the characters had an ounce of self-respect they would have dropped this worthless class by day two and demanded their money back.
* [[Ivy]] refuses to pair up with anyone because she is holding out for Chris, despite this nominally being just practice. Since the class has equal amounts of boys and girls, this means George Philip, the boy she got paired up with, is being screwed over. Somehow, Ivy still gets a 99% in the class.
* The heroes apparently have trouble discerning the identities of people with extremely obvious screen names, which doesn't speak well of their intelligence. Gee, I wonder who [[Simonla Rosechu|DigDugette416]] could be?
* [[Reginald Sneasel]] is, and let's be frank here, a ''[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|fulminating asshole]]''. Reginald lets down his IM partner and classmate FlorDora217 because of his [[Layla]] obsession, intentionally spreads scurrilous rumors about her, sabotages school equipment, and stalks the two on their date. By contrast, Punchy decides to cooperate with Layla and tries to keep an open mind about her despite also having his eye on [[Angelica Rosechu|someone else]], foils Reginald's cunning plan with his counter-gambit of 'have his [[Wild Sonichu|best buddy]] ask Layla directly', and acts like a perfect gentleman on his date. How sad is it that you come off as more of a jerk than a sex-crazed, [[Punchy and Layla's Dance In The Dark|sadomasochistic]] Knuckles headswap? This wouldn't be so bad if Reginald was set up to be the typical jealous-yet-hapless rival suitor that potboiler romantic comedies thrive upon, but given his fate in this episode and the rest of [[Sonichu 9]], he's clearly meant to be a ''sympathetic character''.
* Ms. Jackaras just abruptly dies halfway through the narrative and nobody even reacts except her sister, who replaces her instantly for some reason. Her sister mourns for precisely one panel.

===Episode #20: ''CWC-Defense''===
* Sonichu gets a glimpse of his wife's panties while she's doing laundry and turns into a drooling pervert. Very classy of you, sweet-bolt.
* Sonichu goes on an unprompted, uncomfortably long homophobic tirade that makes him look violent and psychopathic, complete with breaking the couple's property.
* Why hasn't CWCville elected or at least appointed a new interim mayor yet? It's been several months since Chris was trapped in the time void, and there's no reason to think that he'll be back anytime soon, or even at all at this point. Again, the city is forced to dump way too many important decisions on an over-promoted secretary. This gets discussed further in the next section.
* Prower can transform into a [[media:Prowl_prower.jpg|giant robot]] and was very close-by, yet he failed to help Punchy and Layla when they were surrounded by [[Jerkop]]s. Punchy was able to take care of himself, but Layla was clearly unused to fighting and almost got her head handed to her.
* CWCVille's hapless defenders are completely blindsided by the [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|PVCC]], sending their [[Chaotic Combo|heavy-hitters]] on wild goose chases all around the city while apparently not thinking to leave the [[CWCville Shopping Center]], the seat of the municipal government and the main target of the invasion, with any better defenders than [[Zapina Rosechu|a skanky tween girl]] and a [[Patti-Chan|half-naked zombie dog]].
* When the combined forces of Sonic recolors and Autobot rejects prove to be inadequate for defending the city, [[Allison Amber]] doesn't even bother to let the media know, let alone try to get assistance. Bionic and Darkbind for instance, only realize what's going on as the conflict starts spilling out past the city borders.
* Even if Chris is the one fated to [[Anchuent Prophecy|personally stop Graduon and Walsh]], there's still no reason for Sonichu to just let her fly away and regroup, especially when he literally had her at arms' length and in a position to easily capture or otherwise finish off.
* After the battle is over, the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon show basically no concern about [[Chris and death|the destruction that has befallen their city]].

==[[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]]==
[[File:SandyKiller.JPG|thumb|Having a little girl torture her [[Evan|grandpa]]? Totally normal behavior from your heroes!]]
===Episode #21: ''Christian Chandler in Director Amenities''===
* The amount of sheer evil the "protagonists" exhibit in this issue clearly shows their transition from [[Blake|bumbling yet harmless goons]] to [[The Incredible Lioness|terrifyingly violent and sadistic psychopaths]]. From [[Lovely Weather#Deception|rape by deception]] to [[Sonichu_10#Curing_Da_Homos|genocide]], this issue has it all.
* Chris poisons the planet's water supplies with his "[[Homos|straight]]" blood, thereby initiating a genocide against homosexuals, bisexuals and asexuals worldwide. Aside from being ethically perverse, this scheme shows an [[honor roll|inexcusable ignorance of simple science]]. Those few crates would barely be enough to infect a modern city's water supply for a few days, let alone worldwide. Transferring a vaccine through the water supply is also ludicrous; not only would the treatment facilities dilute and kill the immunizing vectors, blood-stomach ingestion is one of the weakest ways to transmit a disease.
* Chris ''{{w|Rape by deception|rapes}}'' his future self's wife by [[Liquid Chris|pretending to be his future self]].
* Chris blows up a building filled with "devil [[trolls]]", sealing it up beforehand as well to ensure that none can escape as he does so.
* Chris (by now you're probably realizing it's almost ''all'' Chris) breaks [[Jimmy Hill|a man]]'s [[Fangs|teeth]] because he [[Parody|parodied]] him.
* Chris violently injects his own blood into his [[Reldnahc|nemesis]], in some sort of harebrained scheme to turn him straight.
* Chris then teleports Reldnahc straight into the domicile of Kel without so much as a trial or medical examination, under the excuse that his evil behavior was due to his recent transformation into an evil homosexual hedgehog. Though stripped of his [[Anchuent Prophecy]]-granted powers, Reldnahc was already on the side of the bad guys before his transformation. Thus Chris just delivered a world-class Pokémon trainer working for one of the biggest criminal organizations straight into the arms of one of his unsuspecting friends!
* Chris and the [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys|Hedgehog Boys]] destroy a populated high-rise building, killing and injuring hundreds of innocent people in an act of extreme [[Twin Falling Towers|terrorism]], because they drew pictures of his imaginary friends with [[Pickles|pee-pees]].
* Chris punches someone in the face hard enough to knock out his teeth, for sardonically referring to him as 'miss'.
* Chris and Sonichu trespass in [[Apologies to Alec and Evan|Alec Benson's Leary - Alec Benson's... Try saying that three times fast with plurals. Heh.]] Chris and Sonichu trespass in [[Alec Benson Leary|Alec's]] house, before Chris destroys all of his computer data and then the computer itself.
* Chris and Sonichu then [[Chris and copyright|plagiarize]] all of Alec's [[True and honest|TRUE and HONEST]] creations, followed by having them beat the shit out of Alec and accusing him of keeping [[Rape|female prisoners]] in his basement.
* [[Collosal Chan]] breaks into an [[Mary Lee Walsh|old woman]]'s house completely unprovoked, and brutally attacks her to the extent of causing permanent paralysis, before having her stripped of her powers and sent to a maximum security prison with no trial.
* Collosal Chan also willingly smashes the staff [[Count Graduon]] is sealed in and releases him at Mary's request, so she can "punish [Graduon] another day."
* Magi-chan shows no sympathy for Silvana's literal emasculation. To be fair, Silvana being gender-changed against her will (she refused a previous offer) is an unavoidable side-effect of stopping the mad [[Count Graduon]], but that's no reason for him to be so gleeful about it.
* Magi-Chan, the inhuman monster he is, informs [[Sandy|an infant]] only minutes old that her mother was murdered by '[[Evan]]'. That's right, even infancy doesn't get you out of your duties as Chris's personal bodyguard.
* Chris and his [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|corrupted officials]] have a show trial for [[Asperpedia|four innocent men]], before having them sentenced to death, with little to no evidence against them.
* Chris and his entourage, including a one-week-old girl and a [[Kel|preteen]], brutally execute four people in violent and inhumane ways. Remember, this is a comic Chris [[Chris and censorship|claims is aimed at children]].
* Chris disrespects [[Wikipedia:Flag Day in Mexico|a national holiday]] by being an [[Chris and his ego|egotistical]] jackass.

==[[Sonichu 11|''Sonichu'' #11]]==

===''Episode #22: A Sonichu Christmas''===

-WIP-
* Cerah makes a big deal about making a special cookie for a Jewish kid named Kevin in an uncomfortably awkward attempt at sensitivity. The cookie, made in the vague shape of a candle, bears no resemblance to any Jewish symbol. The cookie is vanilla-flavored, in case the kid has some kind of food allergy. Rosechu and Cerah do not consider that anyone other than Jews might have food allergies.

===''Episode #23: Simonchu & Bananafunkle''===

* When Simonchu returns to see his sister, he is met with extreme hostility by both Sandy and Wild, with Sandy threatening to use Horn Drill to kill him and Wild even knocking him unconscious on sight. It's only until after Simonla shouts at them do they back down. It should also be made note of that [[Retroactive continuity in Sonichu|since Simonla never died]], neither Wild nor Sandy have any reason to act as violently as they do.
* After an intense night of fucking, [[Reginald Sneasel]] evolves into a Weavile and proceeds to destroy everything in the church. When Angelica wakes and finds him, he says he's too far gone as some sort of monster. Later in the episode, he hooks up with [[Layla]] and seems to have full control over his new form. It should be known that [[Chris and Writing|Weavile don't become more vicious upon evolving]], so that means that Reginald effectively used his evolution as an easy way out after ripping apart Angelica's church and breaking up with her.
* Simonchu apparently discovers a fossil of an undocumented Pokémon, which has been brought back to life. Said Pokémon also apparently used to be human high school senior and was hit by a car before being brought back as a new Pokémon... [[Chris and Writing|somehow]]. Rather then give it to proper researchers of the field for further study, Simonchu dumps it on [[Punchy Sonichu]] because he's apparently the only one who can understand it.
* Punchy agreeing to bring [[Bananasauros]] to his home to live with him wouldn't be all too terrible... if Layla, his girlfriend, wasn't ''also'' living with him. And of course, he didn't call ahead to say he was bringing company; let alone some weird banana dinosaur.
* While Bananasauros is effectively an animal who has little control over the situation, he is fully aware that him being there is straining Punchy and Layla's relationship. He doesn't bring it up or care, instead mooching off of Punchy's welfare and just sitting on the couch and gaming. In the end, Layla does indeed move out, and he shows no remorse for causing it.
* For the sake of science and research, Punchy gets Bananasauros to fuck a Ditto to make some eggs. Remember that this is a human mind inside of a dinosaur banana's body, being forced to have sex for whatever the hell species he is now.
* Before leaving, Layla flat-out punches Bananasauros in the face. While Layla has every right to be angry at Bananasauros, he'd done nothing to instigate that.

===''The Clip Show: Catching Up''===

==[[Sonichu 12]]==
===Episode 24, Part 2: The Clip Show: Catching Up===
*Sonichu has a dream where Rosechu and Chris are both trapped in a fire, and he only has time to save one of them. If he saves Chris, then Rosechu will die, and Sonichu won't be able to live without her. If he saves Rosechu, then Chris will die, and CWCville will have no mayor and cease to exist, <s>killing everyone in it</s> leaving everyone "lost in a void forever". Sonichu then saves Rosechu, abandoning everyone to their fate for the sake of someone who, for the record, will die anyway as a result of his own actions.

==''Sonichu'' Specials==
* In ''[[Sonichu Special 4]]'', Chris decides to take matters into his own hands rather than contacting the local police and/or sending in an ally that could get to [[Kacey]]'s [[Liquid Chris|kidnapper]]'s location faster than he could driving at the speed limit.
* After Chris disarms and wristlocks the kidnapper, Chris intentionally trips him and shoots him in each knee. This is at the very least maiming; Chris is fortunate that his opponent survived to star in [[Episode 20|CWC Defense]], otherwise he'd be facing charges of 2nd or even 1st degree murder. Or not, since CWCVille is effectively an absolute monarchy; Chris rules with undefined power and is of course above the law.

==[[Mailbag]]==
* One needs to read [[Mailbag 5#Chris does not know what "benevolent" means, or how government works|Mailbag 5]] in conjunction with [[Sonichu 10]] to really grasp the scope of this problem, but the CWCVille municipal government is extremely flawed. There are at least three major problems with the administration: the first is that after being thrown into the [[Time Void]], an interim mayor should have been appointed from the city council's ranks if Chris was going to be gone for so long. Who this would be varies depending on the city's charter but this person is typically the chief administrator officer -- which for a city of CWCVille's size would be an elected position (and not Allison Amber) unless the democratic trappings are even more of a sham than we thought. The second is that we never actually see them doing any work. Why, for example, was city defense left (again) to Allison Amber instead of the chief of police? The third is that the city council didn't do anything to stop or inform others Chris's plan to commit mass murder despite him flat-out telling them; even an amateur paralegal would be able to get charges of conspiracy and accessory to murder to stick.
* In gross violation of the 1st, 4th, 5th, and 14th Amendments of the U.S. Constitution Chris reveals that [[Mailbag_31#Magi-Chan_knows_when_you_fuck|Magi-chan is engaged in psychic surveillance on CWCVille's populace]] to ensure that homosexuality is - as it in the author's own mind - thoroughly suppressed.

==See Also==
*[[Chris and writing]]
*[[CWCVille]] - For a more in-depth analysis of the various municipal failings of [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu's]] primary setting.

{{Sonichu}}
[[Category:Comic]][[Category:Lists]][[Category:Villains]]

List of unheroic protagonist actions

2025-05-12T07:10:32Z

Alan Pardew: /* Classic Sonichu Strips */ Article probably needs a rework and/or images to spice it up.

{{Incomplete}}

A recurring tragicomic element of ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' is how Chris [[Chris and writing|''tries'' to characterize]] the protagonists of his comic as [[Rollin' and Trollin'|badass]], [[Honor roll|insightful]], and [[Holding out for a hero|heroic]] yet instead unfailingly depicts his heroes as [[media:SchuComic9P37.jpg|immature]], [[:File:Sonichu - Episode 7, Page 4.jpg|maladroit]], and at times nigh on [[media:SchuComic10P35.jpg|morally bankrupt]]. Over time, the characters have engaged in enough unintentional buffoonery and villainy to easily fill an entire '''list of unheroic protagonist actions'''. While any protagonist [[Collosal Chan|worth reading about]] will have some flaws, from [[Donald Duck impersonation|Donald Duck]]'s temper to [[Sonic the Hedgehog]]'s hyperactivity, the number of vices the Sonichu characters possess are too numerable to shrug them off as portrayals of [[Liquid Chris|flawed but ultimately heroic]] characters, but rather show them as [[Ian Brandon Anderson|obliviously yet undeniably evil]].

==Recurring Shenanigans==
[[Image:Megatron_pistol2.jpg|thumb|This is neither [[Jerkhief|the first]] nor the [[Mary Lee Walsh|last time]] Chris further abuses [[Sonichu Special 4|a defeated opponent.]]]]
* The [[Pokémon]] in this series often are at least as intelligent as human beings, yet various humans tote and order them around as personal servants. This was a problem with the original series as well, but Chris doesn't even attempt to address this issue in his comic. This creates stupidity like the comic finding nothing wrong with Trainer [[Kel]] pimping out her Dragonite to slake Rosechu's lust while simultaneously finding it unremarkable that [[Kevin_the_Jew|human children can date Pokémon]].
* The protagonists are completely submissive to their raging libidos. The characters are extremely quick to hop in the sack with whoever strikes their fancy, often having known their partners for mere days or even ''hours'' beforehand. Aside from showing a lack of self-control, their hypersexuality has directly led the protagonists into danger. They tend to become uncontrollably aroused at the drop of a hat, even in the middle of an invasion of their precious city or confronting their adversaries. Needless to say, it's all very telling of the author's own [[Chris and sex|twisted views on sex and relationships]].
* The characters are overly vindictive when they have any sort of advantage over their foes. [[Manajerks#Merried_Seinor_Comic.2FKirby|Mutilation]], [[Jason Kendrick Howell|sexual assault]], and of course [[4-cent_garbage.com|mass]] [[Sonichu 9|murder]] are always on the table no matter how mildly they were originally antagonised. This is in marked contrast to the basic morality of any [[The Adventures of The American Rabbit|non-ironic]] [[Sonic the Hedgehog|hero]], where instigating or escalating a fight or seeking any revenge past what's necessary to stop a villain from committing crimes is a huge no-no.
* The heroes show absolutely no aptitude for any fighting strategy that's not 'run up to the bad guy and use superpowers until they stop'. They're unable to anticipate [[Silvana|special techniques]] or [[Dark Mirror Hole|strategies]] from their foes, have trouble doing basic coordination of attacks (unless it's to gang up on Black Sonichu), and can't perform any combat feats not constrained in the paradigm of plot-device items or the narrow application of Pokémon moves.
* [[CWCVille]]'s "government" is a nightmarish monstrosity of human rights violations and poor resource allocation that, unsurprisingly, fails to provide basic safety for its citizens. By far the most popular stock parody of Chris's work is to depict the city as a Kafkaesque dystopia that only exists to fulfill the puerile whims of its dictator-for-life mayor. What's more, this only requires a ''slight'' exaggeration of CWCVille's unsavory traits. None of the heroes, of course, have a problem with how CWCville is run, and in fact are shown to be the mayor's cronies, with complete immunity from the law, and receive free houses, credit cards and other gifts from the mayor, not unlike Soviet nomenklatura.
* Fight scenes involving the main characters often have them beating up [[jerkop|jerkops]], innocent, mentally handicapped people who've been brainwashed into becoming [[Mary Lee Walsh]]'s evil minions. It's not until ''Sonichu #9'' that anybody even tries to cure them of their brainwashing. Even then, it's explicitly mentioned that the "heroes" have killed several jerkops, knowing full well they are victims rather than villains.

==[[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]]==
===Episode #1: Sonichu's Origin===
* Sonic just sort of disappears after crashing into Pikachu, and takes the credit for Sonichu's fight against the Perfect Chaos Monster. Sonichu isn't bothered by this and even names himself after the guy who ran him over and immediately abdicated an important battle.
===Episode #2: Sonichu in 'Genesis of the Lovehogs'===
* Sonichu stalks Rosechu to her home and spies on her through the window rather than introducing himself to her like a normal person.
* Kel straight-up pimps out her Pokémon to each other. To be fair, this happens in the video games, but it's rather jarring to see outside of a game mechanics context.
===Episode #3: Sonichu vs. Naitsirhc===
* [[Giovanni]]'s son [[Naitsirhc]] is shown to have ''at least'' two Legendary Pokémon (Zapdos and Raikou) and sports even more in the team Chris describes him having. Combined with how no trainers from the video games or the anime appear in the series, this places ''Sonichu'' in a grimdark world where Team Rocket was victorious over Ash and friends, whose bodies are presumably decaying in shallow graves somewhere outside Saffron City. That, or for whatever reason, the heroes are simply not doing anything to stop Team Rocket from holding power over the world, which while less grim, is no less questionable from an ethical standpoint.

===Classic Sonichu Strips===
[[Image:SchuComic1.jpg|thumb|"Hee Hee!"]]
* [[Vamprosa|Rosechu]], a protagonist, is shown as a vampire, an undead monster that sustains its existence by draining the blood of others.
* When the comic was originally written, no reason was given in the fiction for Chris and Sonichu to attack [[Mary Lee Walsh]]. She is not depicted as doing anything more evil than merely ''existing'' and saying "Hee Hee" and "Want a girlfriend? Tough lightning!"
* No reason is given as to why Chris and Sonichu only get one shot at defeating Mary Lee Walsh. If they had missed, would they simply have left Mary to do whatever presumably evil thing she was doing?
* Rosechu does nothing but look on and say "Oh no!" while Chris is being beaten by Mary Lee Walsh's mecha-Jerkops, despite supposedly having equal power to Sonichu.

==[[Sonichu 1|''Sonichu'' #1]]==
===Episode #4: Black Sonichu in ''Darkness, Speed, & Lightning!''===
* Did Giovanni snip off Black Sonichu's balls like a naughty poodle after he mildly sassed his son? Chris-chan sets up a potentially interesting plot twist -- a clone pretends fealty to their evil creators only to bide his time and betray them -- but then takes his sweet time resolving this subplot while Blachu sublimates his role as the villains' bitch. If Black Sonichu realized that he was forcefed a pack of bullshit and propaganda, why did he cheerfully go along with his handlers for so long before joining the forces of "good"?

===Episode #5: Sonichu in ''Informal Meeting''===
* A map of the area on page twelve shows that Sonic lives fairly close to Giovanni's undisguised headquarters. Why Sonic remained oblivious of and/or ignored the existence of Pokémon's biggest villain for so long is an exercise left to the reader.

===Episode #6: Sonic and Sonichu in ''Black Metal Combat''===
* This issue is the first to show Chris's curious habit of having a character with explicitly better superpowers than their opponent or ally being totally outclassed, i.e. Sonichu's dismal performance versus Sonic the Hedgehog's unstoppable rampage, Bionic contemptuously dispatching Reldnahc, Wes-Li effortlessly beating up Chris-chan, etc. While this is a common theme in fiction to show that you can't always brute force your way through problems and that cunning, strategy, and determination can triumph over raw power, this dissonance seems to happen in Sonichu simply for the sake of making the antagonists look a bit less impotent than they really are. Due to Chris's predictable and boring style of writing, the villains are almost invariably defeated and subsequently cast aside when they and the protagonists next meet.
* Sonic, a seasoned superhero, not only lets the much more inexperienced Sonichu go in ahead of him but does so even after suspecting that they're walking into a trap. Letting Sonichu take point and even springing the aforementioned trap without so much as a warning was pretty weaselly on Sonic's part.
* After a long and arduous battle complete with SONIC SPEED and ZAPPING TO THE EXTREME, Sonichu, Sonic, and Rosechu finally have two globally infamous criminals cornered. And... the comic just forgets about them in lieu of a shopping spree at the [[CWCville Shopping Center]].

==[[Sonichu 2|''Sonichu'' #2]]==
===Episode #7: Sonichu in ''Anchuent Prophecy''===
* Wes and Sarah get personal training in how to use their hedgehog powers from the spirits of ''their'' ancestors; Chris isn't so lucky. The [[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan]] is more than happy to leave Chris to fend for himself. To his credit, Sonichu does at least help Chris get elementary training. Nonetheless, the clan leader's selective neglect of his disciple leaves Chris unaware of at [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|least]] two [[Sonichu 4#Sub-Episode 8: Christian Chandler in "Off-Target Part 2"|superpowers]] that would've made things a lot easier on Chris. Not that he needs ''more'' deus ex machinas in his corner, but still.

===Episode #8: Christian Chandler in ''Chaos & Serenity''===
* Sonichu disappears for a large portion of the battle between Wes and Chris-Chan for no good reason. Considering that Wes was trying to kill Sonichu's "father", his help would've been much appreciated.
* After Wes goes on for some time about why he's behaving evilly, Chris goes on a [[ego|self-aggrandizing]] rant and tries to paint himself as an innocent victim in the love triangle, rather than trying to negotiate with Wes or calm him down. Chris clearly is more concerned about his own [[ego]] than getting his and Wes's shit together to fulfill the [[Anchuent Prophecy]].
* Sarah, despite being told that her role in the upcoming events was to be a peacemaker between the other two humans-turned-hedgehog, decides not to intervene until her partners almost kill each other.
* Chris gets his ass kicked in less than a page by Wes in spite of having more and better superpowers than his rival.

===Episode #9: Chris-Chan, Saramah, & Wes-Li in ''The Evil that Stomped CWCville''===
* Sarah very stupidly decides to dump Wes Iseli right before the prophesied evil takes place, causing Wes's [[heart level]] to collapse right before the fated battle with [[Mary Lee Walsh]] and [[Count Graduon]]. To be fair, you could argue that it wouldn't be right to romantically string someone along just to cajole them into doing the right thing... except that she had no problem inflicting this sneaky tactic on ''Chris'' at the end of the issue.

==[[Sonichu 3|''Sonichu'' #3]]==
===Episode #10: ''Sonichu Babies''===
* Punchy unambiguously murders [[Mypoe]].
* That said, as much as we wish agony and woe on those obnoxious [[Sonee & Rosey|Sonees and Roseys]], Punchy's violent reaction to Mypoe ''mutilating him shortly after his birth'' is completely understandable. The real question is this: what kind of dojo is Shinabe running here?
* Unless he has one hell of an explanation for his actions, Mewtwo stole Magi-chan's childhood and sculpted him into the borderline-[[autism|autistic]] he is today for his own reasons. [[Chris and writing|Not that we'll]] [[Sonichu 11|ever know these reasons]].

===Episode #11: The Chaotic Combo in ''When Hedgehogs Meet''===
* Why is something as powerful and calamitous as the [[Legendary Master Sunstone]] just sitting out in the open, guarded solely by a powerless [[Flame the Sunbird|parrot]]? At the very least it should be placed somewhere hidden. Then again, the Sunstone ceases to become an issue after this comic so maybe the mayor did something smart for once and squirreled it [[List of things Chris has shoved up his ass|someplace more secure]].
* Speaking of [[Flame the Sunbird]], he's only able to fly for about 20 miles (the distance between the shores to where Bubbles is) before being winded. For a bird, especially one that's a self-styled guardian, this is a pathetic level of physical fitness.
* Every single member of the Chaotic Combo pile on Black Sonichu at the end and just beat him to a bloody pulp. While he overpowered them one on one, Black Sonichu getting dogpiled by half a dozen mutants and left bleeding and disfigured doesn't exactly suggest an even fight between a team of heroes and a powerful villain. Besides, Black Sonichu didn't even mean to aggravate them.

==[[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu'' #4]]==
* Chris refuses to leave every time he's called out for soliciting sex.
* Chris [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|curses]] a [[Jerkhief|man]], making him lose his wife, kids, and home, all because he was told not to stand around like a [[Creepy stare|creep]].
* Chris throws a [[Chris and anger|temper tantrum]] because a [[Hanna|girl]] played a prank on him.
* Chris breaks into an [[Mary Lee Walsh|old woman's]] home (not the [[Sonichu 0|first time]] nor the [[Sonichu 10|last]]) completely unprovoked and beats the shit out of her.
* Chris's self-insert fails, forcing Chris's other [[Sonichu (character)|self-insert]] to help his sorry ass.
* Chris and his [[Sonichu (character)|bastard son]] brutally murder a defenseless old woman in cold blood.
* Chris and [[Darkbind Sonichu|another one of his recolors]] injure [[B-Manajerk|two]] [[Merried Seinor Comic|people]] for asking him to leave the store.
* Chris and his [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|emotionless fuck-buddy]] decapitate [[W-M-Manajerk|someone]] for telling him to leave. Granted, said person's head could be removed more-or-less unharmed, but football-kicking it into an old woman's face afterward pushes it right into one of these.
* Chris makes fun of [[Slow-in-the-minds|mentally handicapped people]].
* Chris and his [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|personified sexual insecurity]] beat the shit out of [[Bagget|some]] [[Mary Lee Walsh|more]] [[Count Graduon|people]] for (and you're not going to guess this) telling him to leave a [[Get-Tar Region|store]].

==[[Sonichu 5|''Sonichu'' #5]]==
===Episode #12: Christian Chandler in ''My Best Friend's Cherokian Wedding''===
* Chris is invisibly spying on the wedding. Meaning that he wasn't invited and decided to just [[The GAMe PLACe|show up anyway]] or that he was but just [[The Tale Of The Crazy Pacer|likes creeping around for no reason]].
* What exactly was stopping Chris from deploying another Trap Card, or at the very least, warning the crowd when he realized that his reasoning wasn't getting through? Innocent bystanders might have gotten hurt or even killed.
* With all of the craziness that happens in CWCVille, Sarah Spicer was careless to not have her lightning bracelets at arms length whether or not they clashed with her wedding gown. Chris evidently believes women care more about matching their outfits than about protecting the people they love. Also, why couldn't she just get a gown that didn't clash?
* Boy, those [[Yu-Gi-Oh!]] cards sure came in handy this chapter and previously in episode #8. All of those versatile, powerful, yet easily-deployable effects should make protecting CWCVille and saving innocents a breeze! Too bad Chris lost interest in the franchise after this issue, so they'll never be seen or even mentioned again.

===Episode #13: ''Smashed Hearts & Entrapment''===

==[[Sonichu 6|''Sonichu'' #6]]==
===Episode #12.5: ''One Lucky Dog''===
* Chris resurrects his pet dog. In-story she merely turned from a dog into a magical talking dog, but Chris doesn't hide what he's really doing. Regardless of how many people die in the comic's pages--from innocent bystanders, to victims of circumstance, to real-life gal pals--CWC has only extended this mercy [[Simonla Rosechu|once more.]]
* With the introduction of [[Allison Amber]], it becomes obvious that even in his fantasy world, Chris is too lazy to do any of his mayoral duties that won't help him look cool or punish his enemies. What's more, an unelected city employee way down the chain of command has been promoted to Vice Mayor, although we were led to believe [[Women's rights|she was just an overpowered secretary]] for a long time. Allison performs almost literally all of Chris's mayoral duties, which is [[Chris and the law|highly illegal]] because she doesn't have the relevant authority.

===Episode #14: ''Evil is Afoot!''===
* Allowing his [[Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc|defeated enemy]] mercy and attentive medical treatment is probably the most uncharacteristically nice thing Chris does in this comic. Unfortunately, the magnanimity of this gesture is ruined by the fact that there's absolutely no security in Reldnahc's room during his convalescence, leaving Chris's arch-nemesis free to just ''walk out of the hospital''.

==[[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]==
===Episode #15: Sonichu, Magi-Chan, and Christian in ''Time for a Ball''===
* [[Bionic]] (Chris's first bastard child) makes the highly progressive assumption that [[Third date|women always put out after the third date]].
* Chris and Magi-Chan introduce a convenient [[Chris and writing|plot device]] to help them solve their seemingly nonexistent problems. The question here is that if they knew about them this whole time, why wait until now to 'search' for them? Chris could have easily used them in the past to stop [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|villains]] in the past, yet decided to postpone it to the point where it would cost [[Ivy|countless]] [[Pandahalo|lives]].

===Episode #16: C.W.C. and Sonichu in ''Time Hogs''===
* Sonichu and Magi-Chan are too busy discussing [[Hanky panky|sex]] to realize that Chris has been flung out of the time sphere, giving no thought to helping him. Magi-Chan should have been able to sense it telepathically or whatever.

===''Tune in Everyday to Station KCWC for Everything!''===

==[[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]]==
[[Image:Bigboss.JPG|thumb|What does your existentialist philosophy say about FURRY FACE RAPE, Jason?]]
===Episode #17: ''Rage against the Garbage''===
* Rosechu is so ignorant about how the Internet and [[troll]]ing works that she thinks that taking nudes of herself is going to overwhelm the flow of [[Rosechu#Transgender Drama|shemale]] pictures. Amusingly, this is one of the few instances where a protagonist is immediately broken of their delusions.
* Sonichu, Wild, and Rosechu plot burglary without even ''trying'' to negotiate for the Sonichu Balls. As far as we know, Jason is the rightful owner and Sonichu's crew are a bunch of thieves.
* Wild's family is harassed by arsonists and his father is kidnapped by poachers but the putative Mayor clearly can't be bothered to stop stuffing his face with chicken nuggets long enough to take care of the problem.
* For that matter, Wild couldn't even be assed to look for his own damn father himself. Even if he was still too weak to mount a solo rescue, at this point in the comic he knows at least ten other characters with powers similar or superior to his own and has no excuse for not resuming his quest. Then again, Wild probably knew that his 'friends' were too self-absorbed to give a shit about anyone else anyway. Hell, Sonichu and Rosechu couldn't be bothered to do anything more than go 'oh, that sucks' at Wild's tearjerker.
* Sonichu, Rosechu, and Wild very stupidly schedule the latter's infiltration at the same time as their meeting with the owner of 4-cent garbage. Jason knows that they will be here, so why would they undertake this dangerous and important mission when he's on alert? Then again, Wild doesn't meet any resistance more stringent than a locked safe so it doesn't matter anyway.
* On several floors, Sonichu, Rosechu, and even Chris physically attack people whose only crime is uploading pictures to the Internet.
* Jason Kendrick Howell flat-out admits that he owns an [[Kathleen|underage sex slave]] that he does illegal things with. Sonichu and Rosechu can't even give the tiniest of shits about this grievous affront to human dignity. They're only concerned about Rosechu being drawn with a penis.
* After Jason taunts Sonichu and Rosechu, both attack him and in the latter's case attempts to rape/kill him. Jason only survives thanks to dark forces keeping him alive.
* The 19th Amendment, securing the right of women to vote, apparently doesn't [[Chris and sexism|apply to CWCVille]]. You know, a city supposedly existing within the borders of the United States.
* Rosechu thinks that laws preventing a 14-year old from being able to [[pedofork|assist in nude protests]] are "dumb".

===Episode #18: ''Spring Break 2008''===
* The protagonists are overly quick to forgive Blake. Granted, being a [[The Adventures of The American Rabbit|Saturday morning cartoon villain]], his villainy hasn't exceeded 'kidnap Rosechu and get <s>his</s> her teeth knocked out' -- a far cry from the mass murders the heroes cause in Sonichu 10 to be sure. Nonetheless, it's still dumb for the other protagonists to implicitly trust someone who was only a few months ago working for [[Robotnik|two]] of the [[Giovanni|biggest criminals]] on the planet.
* Bubbles is astonishingly stupid and careless when dealing with Silvana-Blake. Despite getting two credible warnings from Magi-Chan and Jiggliami/Blake that she was about to fuck an impostor, she's still not convinced.
* Blake has more of an excuse than Bubbles than his actions, but wasn't he the tiniest bit suspicious that Bubbles aborted her mission in order to have nasty furry jungle sex?

==[[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]]==
===Episode #19: ''Date Ed (Even Though the Idea Sounds Dated)''===
* This is not the heroes' fault, but the [[Dating Education]] class is mind-meltingly idiotic. The coursework is piss-easy what with fifty-word essays, the IM portion being unsupervised, and an enormous douche like Reginald almost getting a perfect score. If the characters had an ounce of self-respect they would have dropped this worthless class by day two and demanded their money back.
* [[Ivy]] refuses to pair up with anyone because she is holding out for Chris, despite this nominally being just practice. Since the class has equal amounts of boys and girls, this means George Philip, the boy she got paired up with, is being screwed over. Somehow, Ivy still gets a 99% in the class.
* The heroes apparently have trouble discerning the identities of people with extremely obvious screen names, which doesn't speak well of their intelligence. Gee, I wonder who [[Simonla Rosechu|DigDugette416]] could be?
* [[Reginald Sneasel]] is, and let's be frank here, a ''[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|fulminating asshole]]''. Reginald lets down his IM partner and classmate FlorDora217 because of his [[Layla]] obsession, intentionally spreads scurrilous rumors about her, sabotages school equipment, and stalks the two on their date. By contrast, Punchy decides to cooperate with Layla and tries to keep an open mind about her despite also having his eye on [[Angelica Rosechu|someone else]], foils Reginald's cunning plan with his counter-gambit of 'have his [[Wild Sonichu|best buddy]] ask Layla directly', and acts like a perfect gentleman on his date. How sad is it that you come off as more of a jerk than a sex-crazed, [[Punchy and Layla's Dance In The Dark|sadomasochistic]] Knuckles headswap? This wouldn't be so bad if Reginald was set up to be the typical jealous-yet-hapless rival suitor that potboiler romantic comedies thrive upon, but given his fate in this episode and the rest of [[Sonichu 9]], he's clearly meant to be a ''sympathetic character''.
* Ms. Jackaras just abruptly dies halfway through the narrative and nobody even reacts except her sister, who replaces her instantly for some reason. Her sister mourns for precisely one panel.

===Episode #20: ''CWC-Defense''===
* Sonichu gets a glimpse of his wife's panties while she's doing laundry and turns into a drooling pervert. Very classy of you, sweet-bolt.
* Sonichu goes on an unprompted, uncomfortably long homophobic tirade that makes him look violent and psychopathic, complete with breaking the couple's property.
* Why hasn't CWCville elected or at least appointed a new interim mayor yet? It's been several months since Chris was trapped in the time void, and there's no reason to think that he'll be back anytime soon, or even at all at this point. Again, the city is forced to dump way too many important decisions on an over-promoted secretary. This gets discussed further in the next section.
* Prower can transform into a [[media:Prowl_prower.jpg|giant robot]] and was very close-by, yet he failed to help Punchy and Layla when they were surrounded by [[Jerkop]]s. Punchy was able to take care of himself, but Layla was clearly unused to fighting and almost got her head handed to her.
* CWCVille's hapless defenders are completely blindsided by the [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|PVCC]], sending their [[Chaotic Combo|heavy-hitters]] on wild goose chases all around the city while apparently not thinking to leave the [[CWCville Shopping Center]], the seat of the municipal government and the main target of the invasion, with any better defenders than [[Zapina Rosechu|a skanky tween girl]] and a [[Patti-Chan|half-naked zombie dog]].
* When the combined forces of Sonic recolors and Autobot rejects prove to be inadequate for defending the city, [[Allison Amber]] doesn't even bother to let the media know, let alone try to get assistance. Bionic and Darkbind for instance, only realize what's going on as the conflict starts spilling out past the city borders.
* Even if Chris is the one fated to [[Anchuent Prophecy|personally stop Graduon and Walsh]], there's still no reason for Sonichu to just let her fly away and regroup, especially when he literally had her at arms' length and in a position to easily capture or otherwise finish off.
* After the battle is over, the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon show basically no concern about [[Chris and death|the destruction that has befallen their city]].

==[[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]]==
[[File:SandyKiller.JPG|thumb|Having a little girl torture her [[Evan|grandpa]]? Totally normal behavior from your heroes!]]
===Episode #21: ''Christian Chandler in Director Amenities''===
* The amount of sheer evil the "protagonists" exhibit in this issue clearly shows their transition from [[Blake|bumbling yet harmless goons]] to [[The Incredible Lioness|terrifyingly violent and sadistic psychopaths]]. From [[Lovely Weather#Deception|rape by deception]] to [[Sonichu_10#Curing_Da_Homos|genocide]], this issue has it all.
* Chris poisons the planet's water supplies with his "[[Homos|straight]]" blood, thereby initiating a genocide against homosexuals, bisexuals and asexuals worldwide. Aside from being ethically perverse, this scheme shows an [[honor roll|inexcusable ignorance of simple science]]. Those few crates would barely be enough to infect a modern city's water supply for a few days, let alone worldwide. Transferring a vaccine through the water supply is also ludicrous; not only would the treatment facilities dilute and kill the immunizing vectors, blood-stomach ingestion is one of the weakest ways to transmit a disease.
* Chris ''{{w|Rape by deception|rapes}}'' his future self's wife by [[Liquid Chris|pretending to be his future self]].
* Chris blows up a building filled with "devil [[trolls]]", sealing it up beforehand as well to ensure that none can escape as he does so.
* Chris (by now you're probably realizing it's almost ''all'' Chris) breaks [[Jimmy Hill|a man]]'s [[Fangs|teeth]] because he [[Parody|parodied]] him.
* Chris violently injects his own blood into his [[Reldnahc|nemesis]], in some sort of harebrained scheme to turn him straight.
* Chris then teleports Reldnahc straight into the domicile of Kel without so much as a trial or medical examination, under the excuse that his evil behavior was due to his recent transformation into an evil homosexual hedgehog. Though stripped of his [[Anchuent Prophecy]]-granted powers, Reldnahc was already on the side of the bad guys before his transformation. Thus Chris just delivered a world-class Pokémon trainer working for one of the biggest criminal organizations straight into the arms of one of his unsuspecting friends!
* Chris and the [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys|Hedgehog Boys]] destroy a populated high-rise building, killing and injuring hundreds of innocent people in an act of extreme [[Twin Falling Towers|terrorism]], because they drew pictures of his imaginary friends with [[Pickles|pee-pees]].
* Chris punches someone in the face hard enough to knock out his teeth, for sardonically referring to him as 'miss'.
* Chris and Sonichu trespass in [[Apologies to Alec and Evan|Alec Benson's Leary - Alec Benson's... Try saying that three times fast with plurals. Heh.]] Chris and Sonichu trespass in [[Alec Benson Leary|Alec's]] house, before Chris destroys all of his computer data and then the computer itself.
* Chris and Sonichu then [[Chris and copyright|plagiarize]] all of Alec's [[True and honest|TRUE and HONEST]] creations, followed by having them beat the shit out of Alec and accusing him of keeping [[Rape|female prisoners]] in his basement.
* [[Collosal Chan]] breaks into an [[Mary Lee Walsh|old woman]]'s house completely unprovoked, and brutally attacks her to the extent of causing permanent paralysis, before having her stripped of her powers and sent to a maximum security prison with no trial.
* Collosal Chan also willingly smashes the staff [[Count Graduon]] is sealed in and releases him at Mary's request, so she can "punish [Graduon] another day."
* Magi-chan shows no sympathy for Silvana's literal emasculation. To be fair, Silvana being gender-changed against her will (she refused a previous offer) is an unavoidable side-effect of stopping the mad [[Count Graduon]], but that's no reason for him to be so gleeful about it.
* Magi-Chan, the inhuman monster he is, informs [[Sandy|an infant]] only minutes old that her mother was murdered by '[[Evan]]'. That's right, even infancy doesn't get you out of your duties as Chris's personal bodyguard.
* Chris and his [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|corrupted officials]] have a show trial for [[Asperpedia|four innocent men]], before having them sentenced to death, with little to no evidence against them.
* Chris and his entourage, including a one-week-old girl and a [[Kel|preteen]], brutally execute four people in violent and inhumane ways. Remember, this is a comic Chris [[Chris and censorship|claims is aimed at children]].
* Chris disrespects [[Wikipedia:Flag Day in Mexico|a national holiday]] by being an [[Chris and his ego|egotistical]] jackass.

==[[Sonichu 11|''Sonichu'' #11]]==

===''Episode #22: A Sonichu Christmas''===

-WIP-
* Cerah makes a big deal about making a special cookie for a Jewish kid named Kevin in an uncomfortably awkward attempt at sensitivity. The cookie, made in the vague shape of a candle, bears no resemblance to any Jewish symbol. The cookie is vanilla-flavored, in case the kid has some kind of food allergy. Rosechu and Cerah do not consider that anyone other than Jews might have food allergies.

===''Episode #23: Simonchu & Bananafunkle''===

* When Simonchu returns to see his sister, he is met with extreme hostility by both Sandy and Wild, with Sandy threatening to use Horn Drill to kill him and Wild even knocking him unconscious on sight. It's only until after Simonla shouts at them do they back down. It should also be made note of that [[Retroactive continuity in Sonichu|since Simonla never died]], neither Wild nor Sandy have any reason to act as violently as they do.
* After an intense night of fucking, [[Reginald Sneasel]] evolves into a Weavile and proceeds to destroy everything in the church. When Angelica wakes and finds him, he says he's too far gone as some sort of monster. Later in the episode, he hooks up with [[Layla]] and seems to have full control over his new form. It should be known that [[Chris and Writing|Weavile don't become more vicious upon evolving]], so that means that Reginald effectively used his evolution as an easy way out after ripping apart Angelica's church and breaking up with her.
* Simonchu apparently discovers a fossil of an undocumented Pokémon, which has been brought back to life. Said Pokémon also apparently used to be human high school senior and was hit by a car before being brought back as a new Pokémon... [[Chris and Writing|somehow]]. Rather then give it to proper researchers of the field for further study, Simonchu dumps it on [[Punchy Sonichu]] because he's apparently the only one who can understand it.
* Punchy agreeing to bring [[Bananasauros]] to his home to live with him wouldn't be all too terrible... if Layla, his girlfriend, wasn't ''also'' living with him. And of course, he didn't call ahead to say he was bringing company; let alone some weird banana dinosaur.
* While Bananasauros is effectively an animal who has little control over the situation, he is fully aware that him being there is straining Punchy and Layla's relationship. He doesn't bring it up or care, instead mooching off of Punchy's welfare and just sitting on the couch and gaming. In the end, Layla does indeed move out, and he shows no remorse for causing it.
* For the sake of science and research, Punchy gets Bananasauros to fuck a Ditto to make some eggs. Remember that this is a human mind inside of a dinosaur banana's body, being forced to have sex for whatever the hell species he is now.
* Before leaving, Layla flat-out punches Bananasauros in the face. While Layla has every right to be angry at Bananasauros, he'd done nothing to instigate that.

===''The Clip Show: Catching Up''===

==[[Sonichu 12]]==
===Episode 24, Part 2: The Clip Show: Catching Up===
*Sonichu has a dream where Rosechu and Chris are both trapped in a fire, and he only has time to save one of them. If he saves Chris, then Rosechu will die, and Sonichu won't be able to live without her. If he saves Rosechu, then Chris will die, and CWCville will have no mayor and cease to exist, <s>killing everyone in it</s> leaving everyone "lost in a void forever". Sonichu then saves Rosechu, abandoning everyone to their fate for the sake of someone who, for the record, will die anyway as a result of his own actions.

==''Sonichu'' Specials==
* In ''[[Sonichu Special 4]]'', Chris decides to take matters into his own hands rather than contacting the local police and/or sending in an ally that could get to [[Kacey]]'s [[Liquid Chris|kidnapper]]'s location faster than he could driving at the speed limit.
* After Chris disarms and wristlocks the kidnapper, Chris intentionally trips him and shoots him in each knee. This is at the very least maiming; Chris is fortunate that his opponent survived to star in [[Episode 20|CWC Defense]], otherwise he'd be facing charges of 2nd or even 1st degree murder. Or not, since CWCVille is effectively an absolute monarchy; Chris rules with undefined power and is of course above the law.

==[[Mailbag]]==
* One needs to read [[Mailbag 5#Chris does not know what "benevolent" means, or how government works|Mailbag 5]] in conjunction with [[Sonichu 10]] to really grasp the scope of this problem, but the CWCVille municipal government is extremely flawed. There are at least three major problems with the administration: the first is that after being thrown into the [[Time Void]], an interim mayor should have been appointed from the city council's ranks if Chris was going to be gone for so long. Who this would be varies depending on the city's charter but this person is typically the chief administrator officer -- which for a city of CWCVille's size would be an elected position (and not Allison Amber) unless the democratic trappings are even more of a sham than we thought. The second is that we never actually see them doing any work. Why, for example, was city defense left (again) to Allison Amber instead of the chief of police? The third is that the city council didn't do anything to stop or inform others Chris's plan to commit mass murder despite him flat-out telling them; even an amateur paralegal would be able to get charges of conspiracy and accessory to murder to stick.
* In gross violation of the 1st, 4th, 5th, and 14th Amendments of the U.S. Constitution Chris reveals that [[Mailbag_31#Magi-Chan_knows_when_you_fuck|Magi-chan is engaged in psychic surveillance on CWCVille's populace]] to ensure that homosexuality is - as it in the author's own mind - thoroughly suppressed.

==See Also==
*[[Chris and writing]]
*[[CWCVille]] - For a more in-depth analysis of the various municipal failings of [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu's]] primary setting.

{{Sonichu}}
[[Category:Comic]][[Category:Lists]][[Category:Villains]]

Ultra Sonichu

2025-05-12T07:01:56Z

Alan Pardew: /* Powers */

[[Image:219-UltraSchuPose.jpg|thumb|Ultra Sonichu, aka Down's Syndrome Sonichu]]

{{quote|After absorbing the power of the 7 [[Sonic the Hedgehog (series)#Chaos Emeralds|Chaos Emeralds]], [[Sonichu]] transforms into his Super-Form where he is invincible beyond compare. He can fly sky-high and has the most powerful Lightining Attacks.|[[:Image:215-ACUltSchuBck.jpg|Ultra Sonichu ''Animal Crossing'' card]]}}

'''Ultra Sonichu''' is the final form of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] that Chris has hyped before the comic even began. After years of promises, he finally appeared in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]].

Another of Chris's blatant rip-offs, it is a copy of [[Sonic the Hedgehog|"Super Sonic"]]. Super Sonic is the result of Sonic collecting all seven [[Chaos Emeralds]] (which itself is inspired by the Super Saiyan transformation from ''[[Dragon Ball Z]]''), or using the [[Sonichite]] via Mega Evolution. It should also be noted that Ultra Sonichu is basically a recolor of Chris's very first failure [[Bionic the Hedgehog]].

==Powers==
''Sonichu'' #10 has shown that Ultra Sonichu has a plethora of super powers. Besides being able to fly, like Super Sonic, he also has Messianic powers as well. He is shown using his presence to revive [[Zelina Rosechu]] from her eternal slumber (and apparently to accidentally free [[Clawdorf]] in the process), and he uses a power called "Chaotic Remedy" to cure Asperchu and his versions of Sonichu and friends from all their maladies, such as personality.

There doesn't seem to be any specific time limit on Sonichu's ability to remain in his Ultra form, unlike Sonic's Super form, where his only weakness is the fact that his form eventually runs out. After doing everything he needed to do (which included curing every single [[Jerkop]] he and his friends haven't managed to murder of their brainwashing) Sonichu just kind of... stops being Ultra.

In [[Sonichu_11#Episode_24,_Part_1:_"The_Clip_Show:_Catching_Up"|Sonichu 11]] however, it seems the ability lasts for a very short time that even Sonichu himself remarked that he gave up on his Ultra form a few hours ago.

==Evolution confusion==
Ultra Sonichu evolves from Sonichu. [[Metonic]] also evolves from Sonichu. It has already been shown in the comic that Sonichu will eventually evolve into Metonic, so technically Sonichu will never be able to evolve into Ultra Sonichu... but [[Sonichu 10|he found a way.]] He seems to be a Mega Evolution now, as seen in Sonichu 11 where he mega evolves into Ultra Sonichu via a [[Sonichite]].

==Star sign confusion==
After evolution, Ultra Sonichu's star sign changes from [[Wikipedia:Pisces_(Astrology)|Pisces]] to [[Wikipedia:Aries_(Astrology)|Aries]]. How this is possible is still a mystery. A theory is that [[Blake]] is the one to actually assume this form, since he is an Aries, much like Ultra Sonichu, and is supposed to have all the abilities Sonichu possesses. That would be an interesting plot twist to give Blake the role as the actual hero; however, considering Chris's writing ability, this is probably just a coincidence.

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:214-ACUltSchu.jpg
Image:215-ACUltSchuBck.jpg
Image:216-UltSchu.jpg
Image:217-UltSchuEX.jpg
Image:218-YuUltSchu.jpg
Image:SchuComic10P44.jpg
</gallery>
</center>
 
{{Sonichu}}

[[Category:Characters]]
[[Category:Imaginary Family Members]]
[[Category:Sonichus]]

The Incredible Lioness

2025-05-12T07:01:00Z

Alan Pardew: /* Sonichu #11 */ Linking Sonichite article

[[Image:RosechuTheIncredibleLioness.jpg|thumb|This is what Chris actually believes feminism is.]]

{{quote|When feeling the [[Chris and anger|MOST Enraged]], MOST Distraught, MOST [[Chris and stress|Stressed]] Out beyond Belief, Rosechu will recollect why she is feeling this way, then she will transform into The Incredible Lioness|[[Cwcipedia]] article, looks like Chris has made a decent character who reflects on the world around them}}
{{quote|If her clothes are not nearby when she is fully recovered and rested, the poor woman will have to rush home as quickly as possible to clean up and put on clean clothes, or find some kind of material to make a set of makeshift clothes for the trek back home. |same paragraph, looks like Chris has made another [[Rule 34]]}}

'''The Incredible Lioness''' was the horrifying form that [[Rosechu]] was given in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]] originally to face-rape the comic incarnation of [[Jason Kendrick Howell]]. Little information is given in the comic itself, but Chris gives further details on the [[CWCipedia]]. Seemingly analogous to [[Ultra Sonichu]], rather than gaining power from exposure to [[Sonichu Balls|Chaotic Crystals]], Rosechu simply gains tremendous strength through [[stress]] and [[Chris and anger|rage]], closer to [[Things Chris has ripped off|The Incredible Hulk]] than anything else; however, Chris most likely meant to rip off [[Sonic]]'s "Werehog" transformation from ''Sonic Unleashed''. Chris implies that because Rosechu is a [[women's rights|woman]] she can't control herself when she gets into a rage, and the only way to calm her is to tell her that she's pretty, or whatever Chris means by "make amends with deepest apologies, heavy flattery, and promising to do as she wishes".<ref name="Rosechu article">[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Rosechu#.28Temporary_Transformation.29_The_Incredible_Lioness CWCipedia - The Incredible Lioness]</ref> However, in both appearances in the comic, she calms down without any intervention. The transformation process also completely destroys her clothes; presumably she has to have the foresight to know she's about to go into a blind, unstoppable rage and remove the clothing, or just put on some makeshift clothes later. How and why her clothes are destroyed isn't clear as no part of the transformation involves anything that would damage clothing - she does not grow in size or change shape. Indeed, why clothes are such a concern for her in the first place is mystifying considering most of the Sonichus and Rosechus don't wear any clothing at all.

Chris also clarifies that only the True and Original Rosechu can transform.<ref name="Rosechu article" /><ref name="mail 10">[[Mailbag 10#God save the queen|Mailbag 10]]</ref> One could argue that this is due to Rosechu's parentage; according to Chris, she was sired by a [[Wikipedia:Luxray|Luxray]],<ref name="Rosechu article" /> a lion-esque type of [[Pokémon]]. Since this makes sense, it's highly unlikely that it was intended by him.

As you may have guessed, Chris created the Incredible Lioness in an attempt to show his support for [[women's rights]].

[[Image:TILCircus.jpg|thumb|Roll up! Roll up!]]

==[[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]]==

In the climax of [[Episode 17]]: ''Rage Against The Garbage'', Rosechu and [[Sonichu]] travel to Floor 66+6 of [[4-cent_garbage.com]] to confront [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] about the [[ED]] page. Their main concern is the [[trolls|troll]] fan art of Rosechu with a [[duck]], which Sonichu innocently interprets as a simple misunderstanding. Jason outright refuses to take down the ED page, and brutally throws Sonichu to the floor. Rosechu reacts nonchalantly to this, and does not transform until, as the two leave, Jason has the audacity to throw a [[pickle]] at her.

It strikes her on the back of the head. She picks it up and crushes it in a fist, as her mind fills with thoughts of violence and bizarrely ominous feminist diatribes, glorifying the creative power of the ovary. In spite of this supposed respect for the female being, Rosechu goes on to strip completely naked, exposing her breasts and vagina in what Chris maintains is a comic intended for children. At this point, she becomes The Incredible Lioness.

The Lioness leaps at Jason with murder in her red eyes. In what may be the most hideously explicit violence in [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]] [[Sonichu 10|up to that point]], she wraps her legs around his head, so that her [[China|vagina]] is pressed against his face – a move which was [[Things Chris has ripped off#Kekko Kamen|probably copied]] from ''[[Anime|Kekko Kamen]]''. Then she tears a rip across his scalp, and bites down. In moments, Jason is near death (although dark forces keep him alive). Why this attack needed to involve Rosechu shoving her vagina into Jason's face is unclear. Rosechu then reverts to standard form, close to fainting from her outrageous exertion.

==[[Sonichu 11|''Sonichu'' #11]]==
After the [[Moon]] releases an energy wave, Rosechu transforms into the Incredible Lioness in her backyard after picking up a [[Sonichite]] stone. For an unexplained reason, she isn't enraged when transformed. Also, she's [[Nudes|nude]]. In front of her three children. Rosechu is surprised by this, and rushes inside to get a new pair of clothes.

Also worth noting is that [[Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)|Chris-Chan]] appropriates the Lioness' catch-phrase of "I am woman, hear me roar!" - albeit with the omission of two words - upon coming to the conclusion of being [[Transgender]].

==References==
<references />

==See also==

*[[Rosechu]]
*[[Vamprosa]]
*[[Women's rights]]
*[[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]]
*[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Rosechu#.28Temporary_Transformation.29_The_Incredible_Lioness The Incredible Lioness' original article on the CWCipedia]
{{Template:Sonichu}}
{{DEFAULTSORT:Incredible Lioness}}
[[Category:Characters]]
[[Category:Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]]

Ultra Sonichu

2025-05-12T06:59:18Z

Alan Pardew: Extra "even", oops.

[[Image:219-UltraSchuPose.jpg|thumb|Ultra Sonichu, aka Down's Syndrome Sonichu]]

{{quote|After absorbing the power of the 7 [[Sonic the Hedgehog (series)#Chaos Emeralds|Chaos Emeralds]], [[Sonichu]] transforms into his Super-Form where he is invincible beyond compare. He can fly sky-high and has the most powerful Lightining Attacks.|[[:Image:215-ACUltSchuBck.jpg|Ultra Sonichu ''Animal Crossing'' card]]}}

'''Ultra Sonichu''' is the final form of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] that Chris has hyped before the comic even began. After years of promises, he finally appeared in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]].

Another of Chris's blatant rip-offs, it is a copy of [[Sonic the Hedgehog|"Super Sonic"]]. Super Sonic is the result of Sonic collecting all seven [[Chaos Emeralds]] (which itself is inspired by the Super Saiyan transformation from ''[[Dragon Ball Z]]''), or using the [[Sonichite]] via Mega Evolution. It should also be noted that Ultra Sonichu is basically a recolor of Chris's very first failure [[Bionic the Hedgehog]].

==Powers==
''Sonichu'' #10 has shown that Ultra Sonichu has a plethora of super powers. Besides being able to fly, like Super Sonic, he also has Messianic powers as well. He is shown using his presence to revive [[Zelina Rosechu]] from her eternal slumber (and apparently to accidentally free [[Clawdorf]] in the process), and he uses a power called "Chaotic Remedy" to cure Asperchu and his versions of Sonichu and friends from all their maladies, such as personality.

So far there doesn't seem to be any specific time limit on Sonichu's ability to remain in his Ultra form, unlike Sonic's Super form, where his only weakness is the fact that his form eventually runs out. After doing everything he needed to do (which included curing every single [[Jerkop]] he and his friends haven't managed to murder of their brainwashing) Sonichu just kind of... stops being Ultra.

In [[Sonichu_11#Episode_24,_Part_1:_"The_Clip_Show:_Catching_Up"|Sonichu 11]] however, it seems the ability lasts for a very short time that even Sonichu himself remarked that he gave up on his Ultra form a few hours ago.

==Evolution confusion==
Ultra Sonichu evolves from Sonichu. [[Metonic]] also evolves from Sonichu. It has already been shown in the comic that Sonichu will eventually evolve into Metonic, so technically Sonichu will never be able to evolve into Ultra Sonichu... but [[Sonichu 10|he found a way.]] He seems to be a Mega Evolution now, as seen in Sonichu 11 where he mega evolves into Ultra Sonichu via a [[Sonichite]].

==Star sign confusion==
After evolution, Ultra Sonichu's star sign changes from [[Wikipedia:Pisces_(Astrology)|Pisces]] to [[Wikipedia:Aries_(Astrology)|Aries]]. How this is possible is still a mystery. A theory is that [[Blake]] is the one to actually assume this form, since he is an Aries, much like Ultra Sonichu, and is supposed to have all the abilities Sonichu possesses. That would be an interesting plot twist to give Blake the role as the actual hero; however, considering Chris's writing ability, this is probably just a coincidence.

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:214-ACUltSchu.jpg
Image:215-ACUltSchuBck.jpg
Image:216-UltSchu.jpg
Image:217-UltSchuEX.jpg
Image:218-YuUltSchu.jpg
Image:SchuComic10P44.jpg
</gallery>
</center>
 
{{Sonichu}}

[[Category:Characters]]
[[Category:Imaginary Family Members]]
[[Category:Sonichus]]

Ultra Sonichu

2025-05-12T06:58:09Z

Alan Pardew: Added information from Sonichu 11 to update the article.

[[Image:219-UltraSchuPose.jpg|thumb|Ultra Sonichu, aka Down's Syndrome Sonichu]]

{{quote|After absorbing the power of the 7 [[Sonic the Hedgehog (series)#Chaos Emeralds|Chaos Emeralds]], [[Sonichu]] transforms into his Super-Form where he is invincible beyond compare. He can fly sky-high and has the most powerful Lightining Attacks.|[[:Image:215-ACUltSchuBck.jpg|Ultra Sonichu ''Animal Crossing'' card]]}}

'''Ultra Sonichu''' is the final form of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] that Chris has hyped before the comic even began. After years of promises, he finally appeared in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]].

Another of Chris's blatant rip-offs, it is a copy of [[Sonic the Hedgehog|"Super Sonic"]]. Super Sonic is the result of Sonic collecting all seven [[Chaos Emeralds]] (which itself is inspired by the Super Saiyan transformation from ''[[Dragon Ball Z]]''), or using the [[Sonichite]] via Mega Evolution. It should also be noted that Ultra Sonichu is basically a recolor of Chris's very first failure [[Bionic the Hedgehog]].

==Powers==
''Sonichu'' #10 has shown that Ultra Sonichu has a plethora of super powers. Besides being able to fly, like Super Sonic, he also has Messianic powers as well. He is shown using his presence to revive [[Zelina Rosechu]] from her eternal slumber (and apparently to accidentally free [[Clawdorf]] in the process), and he uses a power called "Chaotic Remedy" to cure Asperchu and his versions of Sonichu and friends from all their maladies, such as personality.

So far there doesn't seem to be any specific time limit on Sonichu's ability to remain in his Ultra form, unlike Sonic's Super form, where his only weakness is the fact that his form eventually runs out. After doing everything he needed to do (which included curing every single [[Jerkop]] he and his friends haven't managed to murder of their brainwashing) Sonichu just kind of... stops being Ultra.

In [[Sonichu_11#Episode_24,_Part_1:_"The_Clip_Show:_Catching_Up"|Sonichu 11]] however, it seems the ability lasts for a very short time that even Sonichu himself remarked that he even gave up on his Ultra form a few hours ago.

==Evolution confusion==
Ultra Sonichu evolves from Sonichu. [[Metonic]] also evolves from Sonichu. It has already been shown in the comic that Sonichu will eventually evolve into Metonic, so technically Sonichu will never be able to evolve into Ultra Sonichu... but [[Sonichu 10|he found a way.]] He seems to be a Mega Evolution now, as seen in Sonichu 11 where he mega evolves into Ultra Sonichu via a [[Sonichite]].

==Star sign confusion==
After evolution, Ultra Sonichu's star sign changes from [[Wikipedia:Pisces_(Astrology)|Pisces]] to [[Wikipedia:Aries_(Astrology)|Aries]]. How this is possible is still a mystery. A theory is that [[Blake]] is the one to actually assume this form, since he is an Aries, much like Ultra Sonichu, and is supposed to have all the abilities Sonichu possesses. That would be an interesting plot twist to give Blake the role as the actual hero; however, considering Chris's writing ability, this is probably just a coincidence.

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:214-ACUltSchu.jpg
Image:215-ACUltSchuBck.jpg
Image:216-UltSchu.jpg
Image:217-UltSchuEX.jpg
Image:218-YuUltSchu.jpg
Image:SchuComic10P44.jpg
</gallery>
</center>
 
{{Sonichu}}

[[Category:Characters]]
[[Category:Imaginary Family Members]]
[[Category:Sonichus]]

Ultra Sonichu

2025-05-12T06:42:30Z

Alan Pardew: /* Evolution confusion */ Reworded it to make it nicer to clarify a bit more about Ultra Sonichu being a Mega Evolution (what a retcon)

[[Image:219-UltraSchuPose.jpg|thumb|Ultra Sonichu, aka Down's Syndrome Sonichu]]

{{quote|After absorbing the power of the 7 [[Sonic the Hedgehog (series)#Chaos Emeralds|Chaos Emeralds]], [[Sonichu]] transforms into his Super-Form where he is invincible beyond compare. He can fly sky-high and has the most powerful Lightining Attacks.|[[:Image:215-ACUltSchuBck.jpg|Ultra Sonichu ''Animal Crossing'' card]]}}

'''Ultra Sonichu''' is the final form of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] that Chris has hyped before the comic even began. After years of promises, he finally appeared in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]].

Another of Chris's blatant rip-offs, it is a copy of [[Sonic the Hedgehog|"Super Sonic"]]. Super Sonic is the result of Sonic collecting all seven [[Chaos Emeralds]], which itself is inspired by the Super Saiyan transformation from ''[[Dragon Ball Z]]''. It should also be noted that Ultra Sonichu is basically a recolor of Chris's very first failure [[Bionic the Hedgehog]].

==Powers==
''Sonichu'' #10 has shown that Ultra Sonichu has a plethora of super powers. Besides being able to fly, like Super Sonic, he also has Messianic powers as well. He is shown using his presence to revive [[Zelina Rosechu]] from her eternal slumber (and apparently to accidentally free [[Clawdorf]] in the process), and he uses a power called "Chaotic Remedy" to cure Asperchu and his versions of Sonichu and friends from all their maladies, such as personality.

So far there doesn't seem to be any specific time limit on Sonichu's ability to remain in his Ultra form, unlike Sonic's Super form, where his only weakness is the fact that his form eventually runs out. After doing everything he needed to do (which included curing every single [[Jerkop]] he and his friends haven't managed to murder of their brainwashing) Sonichu just kind of... stops being Ultra.

==Evolution confusion==
Ultra Sonichu evolves from Sonichu. [[Metonic]] also evolves from Sonichu. It has already been shown in the comic that Sonichu will eventually evolve into Metonic, so technically Sonichu will never be able to evolve into Ultra Sonichu... but [[Sonichu 10|he found a way.]] He seems to be a Mega Evolution now, as seen in [[Sonichu_11#Episode_24,_Part_1:_"The_Clip_Show:_Catching_Up"|Sonichu 11]] where he megaevolves into Ultra Sonichu via a [[Sonichite]].

==Star sign confusion==
After evolution, Ultra Sonichu's star sign changes from [[Wikipedia:Pisces_(Astrology)|Pisces]] to [[Wikipedia:Aries_(Astrology)|Aries]]. How this is possible is still a mystery. A theory is that [[Blake]] is the one to actually assume this form, since he is an Aries, much like Ultra Sonichu, and is supposed to have all the abilities Sonichu possesses. That would be an interesting plot twist to give Blake the role as the actual hero; however, considering Chris's writing ability, this is probably just a coincidence.

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:214-ACUltSchu.jpg
Image:215-ACUltSchuBck.jpg
Image:216-UltSchu.jpg
Image:217-UltSchuEX.jpg
Image:218-YuUltSchu.jpg
Image:SchuComic10P44.jpg
</gallery>
</center>
 
{{Sonichu}}

[[Category:Characters]]
[[Category:Imaginary Family Members]]
[[Category:Sonichus]]

User:Alan Pardew

2025-05-12T06:34:19Z

Alan Pardew:

'''Don't expect me to edit here often.'''

'''''{{Rainbow|JULAAAAAY}}
'''''
==My UserBoxes==
{{collapsible
|My userboxes
|
{{GrammarNazi}}{{Straight}}{{AlecBensonLeary}}{{Eurofag}}{{Wii}}{{JenkinsJinkies}}{{LiquidChris}}{{Hex-Box}}{{ClassicChris}}{{Admin}}{{Bureaucrat}}}}

==Pages I'm Improving/Work In Progress==
'''CURRENT ONES WHICH NEED HELP:'''
* [[Krapple]] - Needs updating.
* May (?) and June 2014 Facebook posts and more info on the Sonichu drawing.
* General main page editing due to the Sonichu drawing
* [[Original Sonichu and Rosechu Drawing]] - Need to review
* [[Simonla Rosechu]] - Need to review as well
* Fixing the Sonichu comic pages
* [[June 2014 leaks]] - Review too
* [[Match.com]] - Adding info from this thread: http://cwckiforums.com/threads/chriss-current-match-com-profile.1770/
* [[ReBrick]] - Review
* [[Manchester High Leaks]] - Review
* [[List of unheroic protagonist actions]] - Review

'''SIDE PROJECTS'''
* [[Facebook]] - Every posts, pictures etc.
* [[Template:Check_this_out|Initial Pages]] - Basically the pages to get started with.
* [[Sonichu]] - Improving the Sonichu comics pages.
* [[User:Alan_Pardew/2012 Poster Campaign]] - Work In Progress.
* [[Special:UnusedFiles|Adding unused images]]
* An article about Chris's riddle.

==Other Stuff==
* [[User:Alan_Pardew/Sandbox|My shitty sandbox]]

Taser

2025-05-12T06:27:15Z

Alan Pardew: Portal leads to red link, removed

{{quote|Constant electricity through a quartz on a submarine causes the sonar, and that is with an unfocused, unenergized quartz. With the focused energies that have been collecting between the [[Quartz crystals|Gate Crystal and the Celestial Key]], adding the spark into them will resonate very well into the portal area. Plus it has been foreseen in the prophecy: to activate the spark within the Goddess, she needs to create the spark that [[Merlin]] and his teammates made that separated the universes which will reverse the separation.|Chris explaining his thought process that sparking his quartz crystals will bring about the [[Dimensional Merge]].<ref name=portals>[[Thinking with Portals#Praetor and the Taser]]</ref>}}

{{quote|this body is part electricity literally, so I could take it|Chris on the possibility of tasing himself, referencing the minute electric fields that can be overloaded to cause electrocution, resulting in injury or death.<ref>[[Taser Discussion]]</ref>}}

[[File:PraetorSignedTaser.png|thumb|One of the autographed stun guns that [[Praetor]] sold on [[OfficialCWCmart]], inaccurately marketed as a taser.]]

A '''taser''' is a weapon capable of delivering an electric shock. Chris believed he could harness a taser's power as a means to activate the [[Dimensional Merge]], wanting to use it to shock his Gate Crystal and Celestial Key [[Quartz crystals|magic quartz stones]], believing the spark could open an interdimensional portal and therefore bring about the Merge.

This attempt to break the [[Iron Curtain]] led to controversy. In [[February 2021]], Chris wanted to borrow [[Praetor]]'s taser to conduct this experiment on his quartz crystals, which Praetor had a supply of as they wished to sell autographed tasers on [[OfficialCWCmart]]. While Praetor initially agreed to meet with him and supervise the experiment so that Chris wouldn't be at risk, the [[Watchmen]] white knight group opposed the plan, believing Chris's safety to be at risk, to which Chris responded by claiming it would be fine since he is part-electric.

A [[Taser Discussion|call between Watchmen, Caden of Praetor, and Chris]] took place, in which [[Val]], a Watchmen member, jokingly told Chris to tase himself on video for the lulz. Chris volunteered himself, but Caden discouraged Chris, saying it is a bad idea.

Watchmen members [[Naught]] and [[MKRNightVee]] then launched a smear campaign against Praetor, creating and spreading rumors by taking out-of-context segments from conversations with Praetor and spinning those to create the false impression Praetor wished to get Chris to use a taser/stun gun on himself, by omitting that it had been Watchmen member Val who had made the suggestion. This action in turn led to tension between the Watchmen group and Chris, who criticized the group's treatment towards Praetor.

Ultimately, Praetor cancelled plans to let Chris borrow their taser to shock his quartz crystals and the matter remains another of Chris's unresolved attempts to bring about the Merge. They also paused plans to sell the autographed tasers in the wake of the Watchmen's actions, eventually putting them up for sale in 2022.

__TOC__

{{clear}}

==Background==

For the purposes of discussing Chris's intended use of a taser, it is important to make a distinction between tasers and stun guns, two terms that have been used interchangabley in discussions regarding it. While they share a similar function to deliver electrical shocks, tasers and stun guns differ in that a taser fires projectiles at a target to deliver the shock, whereas a stun gun uses direct contact with a target. (However, a taser can be used as a stun gun by removing the projectiles.) The two terms have sometimes been used interchangeably to describe Chris or Praetor's alleged plans, in particular from a rumor by [[Watchmen]] member [[MKR]],<ref name=mkr1>https://twitter.com/MKR11217089/status/1358939937463169024 (archive: https://archive.ph/PYMQh)</ref><ref name=mkr2>https://twitter.com/MKR11217089/status/1368024530325630980 (archive: https://archive.ph/l0V6Y)</ref> leading to confusion. In addition, Praetor has referred to plans to film a video involving a stun gun in [[November 2020]]<ref name=stunguncart>https://www.instagram.com/p/CHms9kGlhc3/ (archive: https://archive.ph/K6ojQ)</ref> - it is unclear whether or not this is related to Chris's plan to use Praetor's taser on his quartz crystals in [[February 2021]].<ref name=portals></ref> Praetor had also refered to stun guns as "tasers" when they sold them on [[OfficialCWCmart]] during Chris's incarceration. In any event, no evidence has been found of Chris actually using either a stun gun or taser.

Nonetheless, Chris has applied [[magical thinking]] to his quartz crystals. Chris believed he could use two [[quartz crystals]] - a piece of quartz he has dubbed the "'''[[Gate Crystal]]'''", which can open a warp gate,<ref>[[:File:GateCrystal.jpg]]</ref> and a Lightning Struck Quartz piece he has dubbed the "'''[[Celestial Key]]'''", a component to the creation of this warp gate,<ref>[[:File:Celestial key.jpg]]</ref> to open up portals through the use of piezoelectricity. Piezoelecticity is an electrical charge occurring from certain types of matter, such as crystals, to which mechanical energy is applied, such as striking a crystal.<ref>[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Piezoelectricity Wikipedia article on Piezoelectricity]</ref> Quartz crystals work with the piezoelectric effect. Chris believed that he could use a taser in order to achieve this, citing a ''Gaia'' article, which states how people from ancient civilizations may have used crystals to open up portals to other dimensions.<ref name = crystalchat>[[The Place chats - Piezoelectric Crystals]]</ref><ref group = note>The article in question is [https://www.gaia.com/article/did-our-ancestors-know-how-to-open-a-portal-to-another-dimension ''Did our Ancestors Know How to Open a Portal to Another Dimension'']</ref>

==Discussion of taser method==
[[File:ThePlace1stLayer2Feb21-Piezoelectricity7.png|thumb|Chris citing a ''Gaia'' article of the existence of portals.]]
Chris has discussed his plans to shock his crystals on multiple ocassions, most prominently in the beginning of February 2021. On 2 February 2021, Chris had asked the Watchmen member Kyle for assistance on the matter, with the intent of gathering more information on how piezoelctricity works from him.<ref name = crystalchat/> As Kyle explains how the phenomenon works, Chris cites the aforementioned article, to which Kyle states that no definite definitions were used in it, while Val calls it "bullshit but an interesting read". Chris had objected to these statements, getting flippant over Kyle's insistance of the questionable statements made in the article, telling him to "find your better sources to make this make sense in your logic, Dude." when Kyle tells him about finding credible sources.

Watchmen leader [[Naught]] then leaked a DM between him and Chris on the [[Kiwi Farms]] on 5 February 2021, claiming that he was doing this out of concern that [[Larry Vaughn]] is in on with Praetor in a supposed plot.<ref>[[Naught DMs#Chris wants to activate the Merge by playing with taser]]</ref><ref>[[Kiwi Farms posts (Naught)#Chris wants a taser]]</ref> The conversation cites a prior attempt from Chris to create sparks with quartz crystals by striking them against his arms as far back as 2017. Another bit of the conversation has Chris claiming that he would meet with [[Caden Peck]] the following day about his plans to use a taser on his Gate Crystal quartz stone.

==Watchmen's confrontation towards Praetor==
{{see also|The Place chats - Watchmen-Praetor confrontations}}
[[File:Praetor cart.jpg|thumb|150px|The shopping cart image Praetor posted.]]

On 15 [[November 2020]], the [[Praetor]] Instagram account posted an image of an online store's shopping cart.<ref name=stunguncart></ref> Within the cart was 1 Pikachu mask and 1 VIPERTEK VTS-989 560 BV stun gun. Accompanying the post was the message:

{{quote|As Praetor, we always work hard to produce the best videos we can. Good works are in progress!}}

After Naught had discussed with other Watchmen members about Chris's use of Praetor's tasers,<ref>[[The Place chats - Watchmen-Praetor confrontations#5 February 2021]]</ref> they have confronted Praetor on 8 Feburary 2021.<ref>[[Thinking with Portals#Praetor and the Taser]]</ref> When a Watchman member accuses them - without proof - of trying to convince Chris to tase himself, Chris tries to convince them that using a taser was all his idea. However, the same Watchmen would still criticize Praetor for providing Chris access to such a device. The Watchman also asks Praetor if they had plans to film him using the taser. Following from this, the Watchmen Val and MKR had thrown insults at Caden, running the Praetor account.

The [[Taser Discussion]] call then took place, with Chris, Praetor leader [[Caden Peck]], and several Watchmen members.

==Misinformation by the Watchmen==
[[Naught]] made a [[Kiwi Farms]] post in which he posted an out-of-context clip from the [[Taser Discussion]] voice chat.<ref>[[Kiwi Farms posts (Naught)#Taser Discusion clip]]</ref> In the clip, Watchmen member [[Val]] states, "Can you put, 'Can CWC- uh, like, tase himself on video for lulz'." Chris then responds, "I'll do it," to which Val bursts out laughing. [[Praetor]] member [[Caden]] then objects, saying, "Look, are you sure- There- they- like, we had a whole discussion about ''why'' it's a bad idea."

In Naught's Kiwi Farms post, he alleged that "Caden and cwc as Sonichu prime discuss the tazer and who will be tazed", omitting that Watchmen member Val had brought up the subject and that Caden had objected.

MKR posted on Twitter to spread a malicious rumor that Praetor wanted to get Chris to use a stun gun on himself. She gave no proof, instead posting an out-of-context screenshot<ref name=mkr1></ref> from Watchmen-Praetor talks.<ref>[[The Place chats - Watchmen-Praetor confrontations#8 February 2021, part 2]]</ref>

The Christuber [[GiBi]], buying into the spin from the Watchmen, posted a video in which he erroneously attributed the call members in Naught's clip to Praetor - including the Watchmen Val - as well as amplified MKR's false tweet. Chris responded to the video, stating that Praetor didn't convince him to want a taser, and that it had been his own idea to taze the quartz crystals. Chris also took blame for the idea of tazing himself (although it had been Val's sarcastic suggestion).<ref>[[List of Chris's comments on YouTube#Chris Chan is Convinced to Taser Himself]]</ref>

On 13 February 2021, Chris confronted the Watchmen for their aggressive behavior, though [[Kyle]] and [[MKR]] immediately resumed hostile remarks towards Praetor, leaving Chris disappointed.<ref>[[The Place chats - Watchmen-Praetor confrontations#13 February 2021]]</ref>

[[The WCT]] would eventually leak the full Taser Discussion call on 30 June 2021.

==Aftermath==
[[File:PraetorTaserBox.jpg|thumb|150px|A customer who bought a Taser item from Praetor's shop shows off a message written by Praetor, saying to record a video tazing people.]]

Following the drama, Praetor decided to pause plans to sell their stun guns, which had been autographed by Chris, on [[OfficialCWCmart]]. In 2022, they brought the stun guns back out of storage and sold them, inaccurately marketing them as tasers. The listing stated:<ref>[https://www.etsy.com/listing/1224899249/chris-chan-taser?click_key=7a4942e8fa46514032dcde5e7b65fa9e2cde2815%3A1224899249&click_sum=4f497ab7&ref=shop_home_active_8 Etsy entry for a signed stun gun] ([https://archive.ph/1DfR4 Archive])</ref>

{{quoteboxbrown|Recent Christorians may recall the Taser Incident, where the Praetor group while working with Christine posted images of tasers onto their respective Instagrams and Twitters. Through leaked chats and discussion, it was hypothesized that the Praetor group was planning to tase Chris on video. This lead to a flurry of drama and doxing, and the tasers were forgotten.

The tasers had originally been intended for sale, as signed ones would be put out for purchase. To negate negative attention, they were boxed and stored away to wait until the smoke cleared. Now, these zappy little buggers are available for sale once again!

Each Taser is hand signed by Christine herself, emblazoned with her autograph and the iconic phrase "Zappin' it Up!" Per Christine's suggestion.

Now you too can zap it to the extreme. Handle with care, while these are collectables they can be recharged and may have residual charge left over.

Package comes with: 
-Autographed Taser 
-Charging cable}}

One of the people who bought the taser would mail it to the channel SuperMega, where they would unbox it on video.<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DW5OaHIfMdY&ab_channel=SuperMega</ref>

{{clear}}

==Other instances of tasers==
[[File:Incest Arrest Taser Warning.jpg|thumb|200px]]
In [[August 2021]], during the [[Incest Arrest]], a [[jerkop]] threatens to use a taser on Chris if he fights the arrest. Upon seeing the weapon, Chris says he will comply.<ref>[[Incest Arrest#Bodycam video]]</ref>

{{clear}}

==See Also==
*[[Chris and science]]
*[[Dimensional Merge]]
*[[Magic Stones]]

{{Notes}}
{{References}}
{{Dimensions}}
{{Electronics}}
{{CrystalgateSaga}}
{{Fantasies}}
{{articleofthenow}}
[[Category:Relics of Fail]]

Jail Letter - 5 August 2022

2025-05-12T01:26:08Z

Alan Pardew: Minor spelling fix: prevelance -> prevalance

{{quote|Let my past, present, and future actions and manifestations I do in the Divine and Holy work with Emanuel and the other Gods and Goddesses speak of the truths as well before shutting me up or ditching thy faith.|Chris's final words before an extended period public silence}}

On 5 August 2022, Chris had sent a '''twentieth and final letter''' to [[Kenneth Engelhardt]].

Highlights of the letter include:

*Chris addresses Kenneth's concerns about the way he writes in his letters, acknowledging that Jesus Christ spoke [[Wikipedia:Aramaic|Aramaic]] and not the [[Wikipedia:Early Modern English|Early Modern English]] of the [[Wikipedia:King James Bible|King James Bible]].
**Chris claims that he began using antiquated English because it was the language he spoke in his past life as the magician Sylvia in the reign of [[Wikipedia:King Arthur|King Arthur]], which Chris believes was in the fourteenth century. Never mind that Arthur reigned in the fifth and sixth centuries AD (if he existed at all), that there is no mention of a magician named Sylvia in Arthurian legend, and that fourteenth-century [[Wikipedia:Middle English|Middle English]] is very different from seventeenth-century Early Modern English.
*Chris claims himself to be a "fellow servant" amongst the general population, citing that Biblical scriptures allude to this "simple fact".
*Chris once again discusses how he "cleansed Barb's soul", though this time claiming that he did this to pay a mortgage, which he had also requested several people to pay for Barb before she gets relocated.
*Chris insists that all interactions that he had with cartoon characters were real and were not fabrications of his own mind. Chris also claims this to be the case before getting any sort of influence from trolls toying with his fantasies.
*Chris claims that the events of the initial writing of [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]] had foreshadowed the [[Wikipedia:2022_monkeypox_outbreak|Monkeypox outbreak]], citing the disease's prevalance among [[homos]].
*Chris also claims that Global Warming is a natural process meant to weed out the toxics and is a sign of his growing strength.
*Chris writes a postscript, where he claims that the words of Emanuel and other gods should be considered first and foremost before he is told to "shut up" or "ditching one's own faith".

Kenneth sent Chris a [[Excommunication letter|response]] a few days later, expressing dismay at Chris's callousness toward his mother and "excommunicating" him from the "Sonichu Project". Chris did not respond.

This is the last letter known to be sent by Chris from jail prior to his release in [[March 2023]].
==Kenneth's Post==

{{quoteboxonion|Highlights
He understands there have been concerns over our Lord and Savior using 1600s English and understands that this was not spoken in his past Book of Life while he was Jesus Christ in Jerusalem. Language does not make or break a leader, god, or prophet.

He can travel from one country to another and change his spoken language, his physical visage (appearance) and identity time after time.

He left Jerusalem after his resurrection and traveled to England in 1389 and claims the earth was split in two and became separate from the rest of the whole universe outside the Milky Way. Then he went forward through the February 2003 Chaos Rainbow, back in time and between dimensions from C-197 Earth (half) to 1218 Earth (half) for his second ever reincarnation into this life.

He took to speaking King James English because it matched the last spoken language when he was Sylvia the Magician back in King Arthur's time. But if you insist, he will revert to Modern English.

Had the awakenings, enlightenments and revelations with Heaven's Light shining down on him. Still claims he is Jesus Christ reincarnated your Lord, Savior and God. Describes himself as a fellow servant walking among you.

Long known of the Mortgage on the house being reverse but it was retained unconsciously and why he did his "Soul Bonding" with Barbara. His "Soul Bonding" and "healing powers" was a gift that cleansed her sins, regrets and extended her life.

Here is the icing on the cake: "Let me past, present, and future actions and manifestations I do in the Divine and Holy Word with Emanuel and the other Gods and Goddesses speak of the truths as well before shutting me up or ditching my faith"

Translation in plain English: All of his actions and revelations in the past, present and future are justified and speak for themselves.}}

==Chris's Letter==

{{EnvelopeFront}}
{{quotebox|Hey, Kenneth.
I have another public letter for ye to share with everyone for me, please
1 08022022

Greetings and Blessings to ye all, my followers.
I write to ye all to offer some explinations and truths for thy enlightenment and information.
Firstly, I understand there hath been concerns over the language I write/speak in talking to ye all. I know 1600’s English was not spoken by I in my past Book of Life in Jerusalem as Jesus Christ, but the language was ancient Aramaeic [sic]. Language doth not make nor break a leader nor god or prophet. Even a Priest in this present day can speak ancient Aaramaeic and still oust themselves as a False PRist by the Metaphysical and Divine events. I have gone from one country to another and changing my spoken language, physical visage and identity time after time after time again after I left Jerusalem after my resurrection and up to in England in 1389 when the Earth was split into two and became separate from the rest of the whole Universe outside Milky Way, and then I went forward through the February, 2003 Chaos Rainbow, back in time, and interdimensionally from C-197 Earth half to 1218 Earth half for my Second Ever Reincarnation into this life, consciously forgotten my extensive past and worked on…>}}

{{quotebox|…authentic unconsciousness premonitions, visions and Seer insights to progress actively or innately as I did. I took to the English of King James as 1) it matched with the last spoken language tome, to when I was the magician, Sylvia, back in King Arthur’s neck of the woods, and 2) to get thy woke and attentive to the truths and facts I was informing ye all of. But, if you insist, I’ll revert to my modern English tongue, but the truth is still valid, just, and Holy Divinely So. I have had the awakenings, Enlightenments, Revelations, and so on with Heven’s and Universe Core’s same Light shining down upon I and my Body and Aura. So I did and still speak true when I tell you all I Am the one Avatar, Jesus Christ reincarnated, your Lord, Messiah, Savior and God. You all should have realized that as even in the scriptures, it states that your Lord and God shall still walk among you all as a fellow servant. Well, I’m a fellow servant among you, and I have the First Person Real Player One perspective, Seer ability and Powers of Holy Light Power. The Math Equation is simple and direct.
Second, I have long known of the Mortgage being Reverse, but it was retained Unconsciously, hence why I had healed and cleansed Barbara of her sins and regrets and gifted her life extension by my Soul Bonding and Healing Powers, And why I had told you all to send her money to Pay Off the Mortgage Before I said anything, ever of Relocating her.}}

{{quotebox|And lastly, I Know from personal experience from All of this life and before, so my interdimensional connections and encounters with the cartoon and “fictional” individuals and the other Gods and Goddesses on the C-197 half of the Earth were Real; not “imaginary”. And this have been fact with me Before Any Faker or Hater, including IdeaGuy, Ever spoke with me or got involved, period.
Now, you all can and may believe or not, But before you discard faith, Look outside at the rest of the world at present. A Lot of these events I have foreknown and foretold. And here’s an Obvious one from “Sonichu” Book 10: the “Gay Vaccine”, of which I do regret chronicling in such a way, But a certain Monkey Pox has been infecting mostly gay men in recent weeks. Would you not want to go back in time with the Vaccine to prevent this Pox from Men, in general?
And don’t blame the Heat, blame the Solar Flares and Solar Storms; Every Eleven Years, they have been flipping axis and exposing the Toxic and Evil individuals by triggering EVERYONE’S Minds and making even a Neurotypical Hyper Sensitive and Sudden Seers. Look at the events in [[2011]], [[2000]], [[1980s#1989|1989]], and so on and compare with this year. I have been further awakened, in part, by this; and my powers from my Body have become manifested moreso and stronger.

For now, I tell you all to Meditate on That.
Sincerely,
Mrs. Jesus Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu}}

{{quotebox|Postscript
Let my past, present, and future actions and manifestations I do in the Divine and Holy work with Emanuel and the other Gods and Goddesses speak of the truths as well before shutting me up or ditching thy faith.}}

==Gallery==

<center>
<gallery>
File:5Aug2022Env.jpg|Envelope
File:5Aug2022Pg1.jpg|Page 1
File:5Aug2022Pg2.jpg|Page 2
File:5Aug2022Pg3.jpg|Page 3
File:5Aug2022PostScript.jpg|Postscript
</gallery>
</center>

{{JailLetter}}
[[Category:Jail Letters]]

ChandlerFamilyChristmas2004

2025-05-09T15:16:34Z

Alan Pardew: /* Transcript */ Certainly does look like it, though perhaps this name sounds a bit better based on what I can find on Amazon and the Lego website

'''ChandlerFamilyChristmas2004''' is a 13-minute video filmed by [[Chris]] on [[Christmas|25]] [[December 2004]]. The first part was leaked on the [[CWCki Forums]] on 21 [[December 2014]] and the second on 24 [[December 2014]]. In the first part, Chris shows off his presents and the holiday decorations at [[14 Branchland Court]], while the second part features Chris (then age 22) opening some presents with [[Bob]] (77) and [[Barb]] (63). One of the most infamous parts of the video features Bob reading a card from Chris, which is all about the [[Love Quest]] and not the holiday. Also noteworthy is Bob and Barb's demeanor – they sound outright ''depressed'' here, almost as if it dawned on them that this is how their adult son is behaving, and will continue to behave for the rest of his life. Even sadder is that this is also one of the only documented times that Bob, Barb, and Chris have had a recording of themselves in the same frame.

Chris's choice of gifts is particularly unusual – Chris takes great pride in presenting his mother with the iconic snowglobe of fail ([[Chris and his ego|which has a picture of him inside it]]) and a Hamtaro toy (the toy is broken, as it was apparently the last one in the store). For his father, Chris offers a "choice" between ''Fraggle Rock'' on VHS, or ''Fraggle Rock'' on DVD. Why Chris believes that a 77-year-old world music collector would be particularly interested in a live-action puppet show aimed at children is not made clear. Note that Bob's "choice" here means very little – Bob decides on the DVD, but ultimately accepts the VHS after some pressure from Chris, suggesting that Chris intends to keep the DVD version for himself.

This video, like [[ChrisAfterChristmas2004]], is actually from the Director's Cut version of the "[[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)]]" DVD. It is also one of the rare glimpses we've seen of the Chandler living room in its less cluttered state.

__TOC__

==Part 1==
{{Infobox/video
| name = ChandlerFamilyChristmas Part 1
| ytid = ktQ9uBu2n2g
| stardate = [[December 2004|25 December 2004]]
| subject = {{Other|[[C-Mas]]}}
| style = {{Tragedy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt =
| other = {{Leaked|text}}
| previous = [[So_Need_a_Cute_Girl#Music_video|So Need a Cute Girl, Music Video]]
| next = [[ChandlerFamilyChristmas2004#Part_2|ChandlerFamilyChristmas2004 Part 2]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
--Scene 1--
 ''(A TV in the background can be heard playing [[Wikipedia:A Christmas Story|A Christmas Story]].)
 '''Chris:''' 'Twas Christmas Day, and all through the house, the creatures that were stirring were my family, and me, and our two cats.
 ''(camera pans around the [[List of toys|junk]] in [[Chris's room]])''
 We enter Christmas Day in my bedroom of wonderous... fun. 'Cause we have [[Tour of Chris's House|plenty of stuff around the house]]. On this day of... [[Speech impediment|Hwey-zeus's]] birth, upon the, uh, arrival of my doorstep, we find... a Snoopy house.
 ''(camera zooms in on a toy Snoopy doghouse sitting on Chris' bed, which plays "Jingle Bells" when Chris activates it. The music plays throughout the rest of the scene)''
 There we go.
 ''(camera pans across the bed to a SpongeBob SquarePants action figure)''
 SpongeBob SquarePants! ''(Chris poorly imitates SpongeBob's laugh)'' And a tower of gifts.
 ''(camera pans to a copy of "Sonic Advance 3")''
 And [[Vidya|a Game Boy Advance title]].
 ''The camera turns around as if to leave.''

--Scene 2--
 ''We enter another room, with the camera focused on the Chandlers' Christmas tree. The doghouse is playing short snippets of assorted Christmas music throughout the scene.''
 '''Chris:''' And we wander upon our wondrous Christmas tree, with a star that was made so delicately. Delicately... and creatively.
 ''(the camera zooms in on the tree's star, which is a [[rainbow]]-colored paper cutout, with [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] and Chris drawn on it)''
 With Pokemon hanging about.
 ''(pan to a small wrapped present hanging in the tree)''
 And a Christmas present that was supposed to be for the [[Sweetheart|girlfriend]] that Santa brought, but unfortunately... she didn't show. Well, upon this wonderal Christmas Day, we see our two cute cats.
 ''(Chris walks over past the fridge to where a cat is lying on the floor)''
 Hey, Desi. Desi! Eeeyeah. our cat's Desi.
 ''(Chris starts to leave)''
 And Lucy's around somewhere.

--Scene 3--
 ''Christmas music plays on the hi-fi in this scene. Chris walks into the cluttered kitchen where Bob is preparing his breakfast.''
 '''Chris:''' And now we wander in on my family! Say hello, Father!
 '''Bob:''' ''(continuing to unwrap his food)'' Uh, yeah.
 '''Chris:''' Makin' my Christmas movie!
 '''Bob:''' I say you're wasting your chip.
 '''Chris:''' But I'm going to put it onto VHS anyway.
 '''Bob:''' I see. All right.
 ''(Chris forges onward past Bob, through the proto-hoard, to focus the camera on a smaller electric Christmas tree.)''
 '''Chris:''' A smaller Christmas tree down here.
 ''(The camera pans left into a dark, Stygian abyss)''
 And our mother's asleep here in the dark area.
 ''(Chris turns back to his father)''
 Would you care to share a Merry Christmas with the world, Father?
 '''Bob:''' ''(still preparing his breakfast)'' Ho ho ho. I gotta share some breakfast.
 '''Chris:''' Yup! You're having a great start.
 '''Bob:''' ''(finished unwrapping his French toast and now rummaging around for some plastic utensils)'' Yup, found one.

--Scene 4--
 ''Chris is in the stairwell of 14BC, which is separated by a curtain from the rest of the house. He climbs the stairs while pointing the camera back down the way he came, then turns and focuses on his other cat.''
 '''Chris:''' As we venture our way back upstairs to our room for breakfast and mirth, we find our other sweet cat, little miss Lucy. Hello sweetheart! Would you care to meow for your worldwide audience?
 ''(Lucy studiously ignores Chris)''
 Come on, sweet kitty! Meow! Meeeow! What, are you camera-shy? 'Cause you look good on video.
 ''(Lucy continues ignoring Chris and grooms herself)''
 Haha! You're such a sweet kitty.

--Scene 5--
 ''Chris is back in the same room as scene 3. Barb has emerged from the unfathomable darkness and installed herself on the orange couch at the back of the room.''
 '''Chris:''' Now the family is up and about! Especially my mother!
 ''(Chris walks up to Barb's couch)''
 Hello, Mother! Would you care to say something to the entire world?
 '''Barb:''' Merry Christmas.
 '''Chris:''' Yup! ''(pans up to the window, where one of the cats is sitting)'' This is Lucy in the window! I got you earlier, Lucy, but now you're sitting majestically on your windowsale! ... Hey Dad, look what I got!
 ''(The camera turns to Bob, who is now sitting down in a chair)''
 '''Bob:''' What's that? ''(Chris waves the Snoopy toy from Scene 1 at him)'' Looks like Snoopy.
 '''Chris:''' ''(fumbling with the toy)'' Yeah. Here, let's- here, watch this, Father. ''(Chris activates the toy and it plays "Santa Claus Is Coming To Town")'' It pops its head out... plays music.
 '''Bob:''' I see.
 '''Chris:''' Givin' you a little kiss.
 '''Bob:''' Yeah.

==Part 2==
{{Infobox/video
| name = ChandlerFamilyChristmas Part 2
| ytid = ct_Gem8qvnE
| stardate = [[December 2004|25 December 2004]]
| subject = {{Other|Christmas}}, {{Galpals|[[Love Quest]]}}
| style = {{Tragedy|text}}, {{Crazy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt =
| other = {{Leaked|text}}
| previous = [[ChandlerFamilyChristmas2004#Part_1|ChandlerFamilyChristmas2004 Part 1]]
| next = [[ChrisAfterChristmas2004]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
 ''The scene is the upstairs kitchen in 14BC. Chris and Barb are sitting close together at a little table with its own miniature tree, while Bob sits in his own chair on the other side of the tree.''
 '''Chris:''' Yeah OK yeah, it's recording. So, here we are around the Christmas tree! We're going to open presents!
 '''Bob:''' ''(utterly deadpan)'' Hooray hooray.
 '''Chris:''' OK well first off I have a card for my family. Here, Father, you ope- you read the card. (hands Bob the card)
 '''Bob:''' ''(accepting the card)'' I see.
 '''Barb:''' Why don't you open some of your gifts, Christian?
 '''Chris:''' I'll wait... I'll wait.
 '''Barb:''' You-
 '''Chris:''' It's OK, I'll wait.
 '''Barb:''' It'll take a long time.
 '''Chris:''' Nah, it won't take that long.
 ''(Bob has meanwhile finished opening the envelope and removing the card)''
 '''Bob:''' Am I supposed to read it?
 '''Chris:''' Yes, read it.
 '''Bob:''' Am I supposed to read it out loud?
 '''Chris:''' Yeah. Read- read- read it to Mom.
 '''Bob:''' ''(reading)'' "I want to thank you all for your support and love throughout my fantastic, uh...love quest." Phooey. "And...if Santa doesn't bring me... one..." No Chris, no comment(??). [''pause, exasperated sigh''] "...like I asked him, then I'm going to need some support finding a [[Boyfriend-free girl|boyfriend-free]]..." [''laughs''] [[Affair with Mother|It'll come, Christian]], "hope you all... like my... presents."
 '''Barb:''' OK.
 '''Bob:''' ''(continuing reading)'' "Today I'm thinking of Christmas and remembering you all. Merry Christmas, Christian C."
 '''Chris:''' Yup! All right, Father, first I'll give you presents, well first you've got to choose, uh, they both have the same content ''(Bob leans forward and tosses the card onto the table)'', since you choose whether you want it on DVD or VHS.
 '''Bob:''' I see.
 '''Chris:''' They have everything the same thing except the VHS is recorded off of the DVD. So... which one you want, VHS or DVD?
 '''Bob:''' No, no, I'll take DVD, I don't like VHS much.
 '''Chris:''' Really?
 '''Bob:''' DV- I mean VHS.
 '''Chris:''' So you want the VHS?
 '''Bob:''' Yeah.
 '''Chris:''' Here you go. ''(hands Bob a gift-wrapped VHS tape)''
 '''Bob:''' I'm not much for... that other... DVD.
 '''Barb:''' Why do you have it on both? (?)
 '''Chris:''' I gave him a choice, remember? You remember he originally wanted DVD? ...It's ''Fraggle Rock'', Father, that's what's on there.
 '''Bob:''' I see. ''(Bob starts halfheartedly trying to unwrap the VHS)''
 '''Chris:''' Everything that's on the DVD is on that VHS.
 '''Bob:''' VHS works better in my system.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah. ''(putting the DVD copy aside)'' Here, I'll just add that to my collection later.
 '''Bob:''' I cain't get it open.
 '''Barb:''' That's alright. ... We're fine.
 '''Chris:''' ''(reaching down and picking up a present which he hands to Barb)'' Here Mom, I picked this out for you. ''(sigh)'' I'll just get this one that's, uh, in the bag here. ''(Chris rummages around under the tree and comes up with a plastic shopping bag)''
 '''Bob:''' You used up all the tape.
 '''Chris:''' Not ''all'' the tape, Father.
 '''Bob:''' 'Most all of it.
 ''(Chris pulls out a Lego set, the LEGO Sports Snowboard Super Pipe #3585, from the bag and sets it on the table right in front of Barb)''
 '''Chris:''' Snowboarding stuff!
 '''Barb:''' Let's put it on the floor.
 '''Chris:''' Yup.
 '''Bob:''' ''(turning over the VHS in his hands)'' It's got all the Fraggles, huh?
 '''Barb:''' You can open another one.
 '''Chris:''' I'll wait.
 ''(Bob puts the wrapping material on the table with a stress sigh)''
 '''Bob:''' I like the Fraggles.
 '''Chris:''' Maybe I'll do this one.
 '''Bob:''' Fraggles are cute.
 '''Chris:''' Yes, they ARE cute. Anyway, your item is- your thing is in the box, Mom. I fit it in the box with some cardstock paper. But it just (slides?) apart. ''(Chris puts some dilapidated miscellaneous packaging on the table and hands Barb a plush doll)'' ''(in a revolting baby-talk voice)'' Have you- I got you ''Hamtaro''.
 '''Barb:''' Oh... that's cute.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah.
 '''Barb:''' Thank you.
 '''Bob:''' Who is he?
 '''Chris:''' ''(still baby-talking)'' It's a Hamtaro. He's a widdle hamstuh.
 '''Bob:''' I see.
 '''Chris:''' ''(dialing the revoltingness up to 11 on his baby talk)'' He's a widdle itty bitty hamstuh!
 '''Bob:''' ''(opening another present)'' This would be no good no more anyway.
 '''Barb:''' (???)
 '''Chris:''' Oh, that's my present for [[Sarah Nicole Hammer|Sarah]]. I, 'cause, you know, she- she might come over.
 '''Bob:''' Don't know if she will or not.
 '''Chris:''' Well she did last year, remember?
 ''(Barb gathers up the used wrapping paper and clears it away – presumably depositing the sediments directly into one of the lower strata of the hoard. There are a few seconds' silence.)''
 '''Bob:''' ''(reading label)'' "''Fraggle Rock''".
 '''Chris:''' ''(perhaps referring to Sarah's present?)'' Britney Spears!
 '''Bob:''' Good old Fraggle people.
 '''Chris:''' ''(rummaging around under the tree)'' This one.
 '''Bob:''' ''(putting the bootleg Fraggles VHS on the table)'' There we go.
 '''Chris:''' Here you go, Father, Fraggles on VHS.
 '''Bob:''' You can keep ''Fraggle Rock''... in your DVD player.
 '''Chris:''' ''(opening a present)'' Oh, you found it, Mom. It's great. Thank you!
 '''Barb:''' You're welcome.
 '''Chris:''' Mmmm. ''(Chris throws an arm over Barb's shoulder in a hug, but accidentally drops something?)'' Here... whoops, I'm sorry.
 '''Barb:''' Don't hurt my head.
 '''Chris:''' I'm sorry. Well, here, I got this for both of y'all. Here Mom, you open this one since Father opened the card. ''(Chris rummages around while Barb begins opening the present)'' I bought it over at [[Mal-Wart|Wal-Mart]] and then I, uh, assembled it. And by the way, the box in there is about the same deal as, uh, Hamtaro there. After you unwrap the present, and (???) the paper there...
 '''Bob:''' I don't know where my Christmas CDs are. We got a couple.
 '''Chris:''' You want music? Here you go! ''(Chris turns on the electronic tree's music, which plays assorted carols throughout the rest of the scene)'' I think you- I think you all will really like what I got here. Oh, yeah, I taped these two boxes together here...
 ''(Chris barges his hand right into whatever Barb is unwrapping, and Barb protests)''
 '''Chris:''' I'm sorry.
 '''Bob:''' I've lost track of where all my music is.
 ''(Barb finishes unwrapping the present)''
 '''Chris:''' Snow globe! [[Chris and his Ego|With me in it!]]
 '''Barb:''' Merry Christmas, Robert.
 '''Chris:''' It's also got- it's also got Sonichu in it, look. See? Me on one side, Sonichu on the other.
 '''Barb:''' That's true.
 '''Chris:''' I got it over at Wal-Mart. The snow globe.
 '''Bob:''' How about that.
 '''Barb:''' And you had your... picture. That's neat.
 '''Bob:''' No, no.
 '''Chris:''' Yup.
 '''Bob:''' ''(chuckling)'' Hope it's waterproof in there.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah. ''(picks up and shakes the snow globe to demonstrate)'' And it's got- the pho, photos are in a- are behind a plastic. I mean- ''(turns the snow globe upside-down and starts removing the bottom)''
 '''Barb:''' Don't open it, don't open it.
 '''Chris:''' You see, the bottom is removable. See?
 '''Bob:''' Well... we know that.
 '''Chris:''' See? Look at that, see? There's a slide here.
 '''Bob:''' Oh. So they're waterproof.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, they're fine.
 '''Bob:''' That's a good idea.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, I got that o- I got that snow globe over at Wal-Mart. ... All right, well let's see what's in this one. ''(starts opening a present)'' I picked that one out special for y'all, that card. Let's see what's in here! Look! It's an Autobot!
 '''Bob:''' An Autobot?
 '''Chris:''' Yes.
 '''Bob:''' Didn't know they were that fancy.
 '''Chris:''' Well these guys are.
 '''Barb:''' The Transformer.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah.
 '''Bob:''' Boy, they sure got fancy over the years.
 '''Chris:''' Yup, they sure did. ''(Chris places the unwrapped Transformer on the table and rummages around under the tree again)'' And one last present! It's a big one. ''(unwraps)'' And then I got another Autobot and a Decepticon!
 '''Bob:''' Hooray.
 '''Barb:''' Very good. Yay, Merry Christmas. ''(claps)''
 '''Chris:''' Yay, Merry Christmas to you all, I mean I got you all a snow globe
 '''Bob:''' Careful with that cord.
 '''Chris:''' ''(switching back to baby talk)'' I got you all a snow globe. And a video, and a little hamstuh. You like the hamstuh, Mommy?
 '''Barb:''' Yeah. I think it's broken.
 '''Chris:''' Um, it-it c- it came that way. It was the last one they had. That's no problem, 'cause you know it can still stand.
 '''Barb:''' Yeah.
 '''Chris:''' It's not like it's gonna leak.
 '''Barb:''' Yeah, okay. That's cool. Yeah, that's neat. Merry Christmas.
 '''Chris:''' Yup, Merry Christmas!
 '''Barb:''' Yeah, now we'll go back downstairs where it's warm.
 '''Bob:''' Have a snappy New Year.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, snappy New Year, huh? ''(heads over to camera)''
 '''Bob:''' Not on the couch/count(??).
 '''Chris:''' Yep! ''(turns camera off)''

{{articleofthenow}}
{{CWC on TV}}

[[Category:2004]]
[[Category:Leaked videos]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos before 2007| 2004-12-25]]
[[Category:Kodak camera videos| 2004-12-25]]

User talk:Hurtful Truth Level

2025-05-09T14:51:57Z

Alan Pardew: /* Refreshing Maintenance Special Pages */ new section

==Editing your Video Request page==

Do you have trouble editing the video request page you created? I tried to include two additions from Chris's uploads, "Machine Romans" and "Singing 'All of the Lights'", but when I save, the page refreshes to an empty website. I don't seem to have this issue with any other page. Is just me or you as well?--[[User:Galilean|Galilean]] ([[User talk:Galilean|talk]]) 23:56, 8 August 2016 (UTC)

Yeah. I can't edit it, either. It's happened with several other pages, too. I asked Marvin about it once, and he said it's a 500 error, something to do with a conflict between the version of Mediawiki used here and the captcha.

If it happens to you again, you can hit backspace and copy the text from the editing window to your computer, so you don't lose your edits.

Should we ask Marvin to fix it, or create a new Video Request page for August? The original page might get crowded after awhile. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 01:36, 9 August 2016 (UTC)

*Yeah, I'm thinking a month by month basis would be the best option. Chris isn't likely to stop these requests since it's free money—there may be over a hundred of these videos by this time next year.

**If there's no indication that the problem will resolve itself, I strongly recommend just copying everything over into a new page.--[[User:Galilean|Galilean]] ([[User talk:Galilean|talk]]) 03:15, 9 August 2016 (UTC)

*The only problem with copying to a new page is that some articles link to the original - http://sonichu.com/cwcki/Special:WhatLinksHere/Paid_Video_Requests - it should be easy to fix the links, though. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 04:13, 9 August 2016 (UTC)

*Marvin fixed the 500 error. I've added the two newest videos. I think we should see how many videos Chris makes in August. If it's more than what he did in July, we could easily split the August stuff into another page. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 07:22, 9 August 2016 (UTC)

== Chris and Religion ==

Your subsection on Chris's concept of God was informative but I think somewhat inaccurately conjecturable. It's obvious Chris's statement is an effect of his self-identity issue. But rather than his [[I am STRAIGHT|twisted world view]] that women are "so kind and sweet.. and caring", and that men are "rude, crude, and inconsiderate... causing wars and such", I think this is more a result of Chris's [[ego]].

Going off from the traditional assertions of the CWCki,
Chris is so egocentric, he views God as a cosmic gumball machine (Whose's ultimate nature is make him happy). He believes God has a special interest in his life and should only attend to his needs and wants alone. '''God revolves around Chris.'''

From this, I think it's more reasonable to assume that Chris's [[autism|inference]] here is a result of a need to alter his conception of God in order to better fit his narrative of "what God is". God is an instrument of Chris's will. Chris became Christine, therefore GodJesus became GoddessEmanuelle.

Since you were the first to analyze Chris's statement, I wanted your input before possibly overhauling your comment.--[[User:Galilean|Galilean]] ([[User talk:Galilean|talk]]) 04:07, 20 August 2016 (UTC)

Good ideas. It's alright with me if you want to edit the article. I think you're right that he wanted to mold God into his own image because of his ego, but it seems to me that his gender issues plays a role as well. There's a theory that he became transgender because of his binary thought pattern of hating men and praising women. Chris wanting God to be in solidarity with him could be a result of both his ego and views on gender. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 08:49, 20 August 2016 (UTC)

== Are you experiencing the same bug? ==

Hey Hurtful. I really appreciate how you helped me in the past. If you wouldn't mind, I was hoping I could explain a new predicament I have and if you could inform me whether you are experiencing the same bug:

I recently added a new icon to the Subject Matters: [[Template:(Handouts)|Handouts]]. I had a little difficulty modifying the size of the image, but I eventually got that resolved. At first, I had the template link this new icon to the page you created, [[Paid Video Requests]], but then I realized [[Chris and money]] would be more fitting; so I changed it.

When I'm logged in, there are no issues.

But when I'm logged out, the icon image reverts to a larger size and it links back to [[Paid Video Requests]]. Since this happens when I'm logged off, I'm worried this might be what everyone else is experiencing. Could you verify this for me?

On a curious note, I noticed that two of the pages you recently edited [[Donations Requested, Please]] and [[Donations Required, Serious. Please help]] (which include the new icon), do not have this issue when I'm logged out.

I know this might seem a little confusing or trivial, but I'd really appreciate your input.

Thanks again for all your help!--[[User:Galilean|Galilean]] ([[User talk:Galilean|talk]]) 21:51, 15 October 2016 (UTC)

*It looks fine to me, whether I'm logged in or not - the size is right and it links to Chris and Money. Have you tried using a different browser to view the template? [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 06:33, 16 October 2016 (UTC)

*For whatever reason, it seems to have resolved itself. Sorry for the bother!--[[User:Galilean|Galilean]] ([[User talk:Galilean|talk]]) 16:54, 17 October 2016 (UTC)

*No problem. Good to see it's working well. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 20:59, 17 October 2016 (UTC)

==Reply re. Timeline month lists==

Hi, I remembered how to find out who posts anonymously. I've left a reply to your comment on my own User Discussion page; let me know what you think. In the meantime, as a courtesy, I will revert my edits so that your separate lists of videos and Facebook comments appear at the top of each page. However, I want to also include all that stuff within the timeline as well, day by day, in a traditional "Events" format. Maybe other people will chime in on this issue. I hope this is a satisfactory compromise for now. [[User:Asperhes|Asperhes]] ([[User talk:Asperhes|talk]]) 07:47, 8 May 2017 (UTC)

*My mistake - I always forget to sign my name on discussion posts. No need to revert changes. I think you've made a good point about your method.[[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 08:51, 8 May 2017 (UTC)

== Chris and oration ==

Here's what I have so far for my oration article:

'''Chris and Oration'''

Whenever Chris wants to make a point regarding his opinions or his childlike mindset, one way he’ll attempt to move people is through orating his reasoning onto them. Since Chris lacks some of the basic skills needed to make an effective speech, rarely ever plans out anything he makes, has serious communication problems, and never does research, his speeches always turn out lackluster at best and horrifyingly naive at worst.

===Chris as a public speaker===

To put it delicately, Chris simply is incompetent at giving a comprehensive speech that people can follow.

*He can’t communicate properly

*He refuses to make a change in himself

*He lacks respect for opinions that differ from him

What makes Chris hated by many is that he will make spiteful, hate-filled, sometimes discriminatory comments towards the people he talking about.

===Common Traits of Chris’ Speeches===

*Hate Speech

One reason why Chris is hated by many is that he spews spiteful, hate-filled, sometimes discriminatory comments at [[Megan Schroeder|people]] [[Michael Snyder|he]] [[Pmurt|feels]] are his enemies.

*Rhetorics

Whenever Chris writes a speech, sometimes it is because he wants people to consider to view the world through

*Bias and One-Sided Arguments

Most Christorians already know that Chris is as stubborn as a mule. This means that regardless of what evidence you give to him that suggests he’s wrong about something, he’ll always try to find some kind of information out of thin air to further verify his beliefs.

===Political Videos===

Now that Chris has become more vocal about his political views, it makes perfect sense that Chris will want to orate his views onto other people.

===Other Examples===

*Autism Tutorial

===In the comics===

At some point in the comics, many of the characters will give a speech regarding their opinions on the current situation. Other times, Chris will use these same comics to write speeches of his own. The comics turn out to be a very good source for learning about Chris’ orating skills.

For example, towards the end of Episode 17 in [[Sonichu 8]], Sonichu gives a speech about how [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] is not only triggering Chris by giving Rosechu a [[pickle]], but how doing so somehow drags both his and other United States citizens through the mud.

===See Also===

*[[Chris and politics]]
*[[Chris and English|Speaking Problems]]
*[[Speech Impediment]]

{{PoliticalVideos}}
{{Chris and}}

----

I would really like to hear your opinion on it so far, and if you think there's anything I might need to improve upon.

*I like it. Looks good so far. Maybe add a summary of [[THAT IS MY HOUSE]]? His "NOW, NOW, NOW!" demand is one of the funniest things he's said. I'll try to think of more examples.

* I personally think that what this wiki might need is some fact checkers, especially for new articles like mine. Are you any good at fact checking, because I'm not exactly sure if everything in my article is correct or validated, here's the link to the article ---> (https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_and_oration)

*I'll take a look. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 22:00, 28 July 2017 (UTC)

==Chris and gender==

I've added more onto the Chris and gender page since I've felt that needed serious improvement, but it was orphaned for a while. I was adding pictures onto the article and adding two new sections about Chris' stance on Non-binary genders, and how his views on gender affect what happens in the comics. I also feel like the article itself should revolve more about how Chris views gender as a whole more than how sexist he is since that has been discussed in great depth in two of the Chris and... articles, Women's Rights (Chris and sexism) and Jerks (Chris and misandry). [[User:PsychoNerd054|PsychoNerd054]] 2:47, 30 July 2017 (UTC)

*Nice work. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 02:21, 1 August 2017 (UTC)

*Thank you, but don't you kind of think that the page should have a complete make-over? To me, the page as it is is still riddled with flaws, even with the stuff I added to it. The page itself seems to focus more on how sexist Chris is, as well as the tomgirl saga, both of which already have their own articles, and go into a lot more detail into both, rather than how he views gender as a whole, sort of the same way the "Chris and race" was formatted, showing Chris' opinion on both males and females as well as going into detail on other topics such as stereotypes, Genderqueer, and Androgyny. Generally speaking, about 40% of the articles on this wiki could just as easily become Chris and... articles themselves.

** For example, the Alchohol article might as well have been called "Chris and alcohol"
** The Tobacky article might as well have been called "Chris and smoking"
** The Christmas article might as well have been called "Chris and Christmas"
** The Wikipedia article might as well have been called "Chris and Wikipedia"

And you pretty much get the point from this point forward, however, whenever people attempt to make new Chris and, articles, many of the attempts seem to be complete failures. For example, the user page, "Chris and depression", didn't make it as a Chris and... article because it was highly speculative on a condition that Chris might not even have at all, and the user page "Chris and reliability" also didn't make it as a Chris and... article because it could all just as easily be explained better in other articles like "Chris and hypocrisy" and "Chris and negotiation".

In my opinion, a Chris and... article should mainly revolve around broad topics such as:

**Major Aspects of his life (e.g. "Chris and death", "Chris and religion", etc.)
**His Personality/Psyche (e.g. "Chris and anger", "Chris and stress", etc.)
**His opinions on society (e.g. "Chris and politics", "Chris and race", etc.)
**His means of communication (e.g. "Chris and writing", "Chris and negotiation")
**His knowledge of the industry and business, which is especially relevant given the Financhu Crisis (e.g. "Chris and business", "Chris and copyright", etc.)
**His skills (e.g. "Chris and art", "Chris and music", etc.)

I'd recommend writing about a broad topic when it comes to Chris and... articles since Chris and... articles need to be of decent length, and writing these articles around a broad topic will guarantee the article is of decent length. They should also go into more detail on the basics of who Chris is. I feel like the Chris and... articles should be made as a means of introducing people who are new to the Chris-Chan bubble to what makes Chris, Chris.

Finally, despite my new Chris and... articles ("Chris and oration" and "Chris and journalism") being approved by a few Cwcki users who've looked at them, since they both seem to be important topics that haven't been discussed a whole lot about on this wiki yet, such as Chris' poorly made speeches or how people got to learn about Chris' life, they still haven't gained any approval from admins, which worries me a bit.

Therefore, I kind of feel like the Chris and gender article needs to improved.

*My opinion is that gender-related subjects are more relevant to understanding Chris than race, so there's going to be more about that in articles. Feel free to shuffle things around if you see there's too much duplicate commentary, but, on the Gender page, there should probably still be at least a summary of stuff like his views on women's rights, misandry, etc, while linking to the main articles. About your "Chris and" articles... don't worry about the admins. The only active one is Canine, and he's said he doesn't really moderate the wiki (he said this when people asked him whether Chris and politics would be a good article, and he deferred to the wiki editors to decide that). [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 15:00, 1 August 2017 (UTC)

== Deletion ==

Two questions:

Question one: Do you think [[Chris and nostalgia]] is fixable? It's quite short. Not quite as bad as [[Chris and zealotry]].

Question two: Can I please get you to delete some stuff that's been sitting around for way too long?

#[[Inventions]] - tagged since 2013, almost no inbound links
#[[Heathchan]] - empty
#[[29 December 2014]] - empty
#[[Skurvypete]] - empty, blanked by creator
#[[Omar Woodley]] - no relevance to the wiki
#[[Court sightings]] - redundant to [[26 December 2014]]
#[[Holliday Greetings to Karen Riley]] - empty
#[[Chris Compared to other infamous Internet people]] - personal essay with no wiki relevance
#[[Pink sapphires rolex replica figurine]] - empty
#[[Key Pieces Of Baby Pink Bandage Dress]] - empty

[[User:Apostrophe|Apostrophe]] ([[User talk:Apostrophe|talk]]) 03:59, 17 November 2017 (UTC)

*[[Minor CWC-isms]] should also be deleted, since the merge tag has been added since 2009, and overall, it's more efficient to make an index of all of the CWC-isms. [[User:PsychoNerd054|PsychoNerd054]] ([[User talk:PsychoNerd054|talk]]) 17 November 2017 (UTC)

I think Nostalgia has some potential. Maybe it could be written like [[Chris and brand loyalty]], with sections for things he's really nostalgic about (high school, Megan, BronyCon, etc).

And sure, I'll start on the deletion list.

Has all the content from Minor CWC-isms been moved over? [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 06:38, 17 November 2017 (UTC)

*Yes, everything has been moved, it's just that most of the content has been commented because I didn't finish making all of the entries yet. [[User:PsychoNerd054|PsychoNerd054]] ([[User talk:PsychoNerd054|talk]]) 17 November 2017 (UTC)

*Could you delete the [[Gaybian]] page? That never needed to be an article in the first place. [[User:PsychoNerd054|PsychoNerd054]] ([[User talk:PsychoNerd054|talk]]) 19 November 2017 (UTC)

::I think a redirect would work better, since there are a lot of pages that link to Gaybian. I'll transfer the content to Homos. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 22:35, 19 November 2017 (UTC)

::Merged in [[Gaybian]]. Does it look okay where it is? [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 22:02, 20 November 2017 (UTC)

::Sorry for the late reply. To me, the gaybian page, doesn't really need an entire section in any article either, it's probably better as a brief mention, or an entry in the CWC-isms page. Speaking of the Homos page, I don't really think "Homos" really classifies as a CWC-ism, as it's already a modern slang word for homosexual people. I'm mentioning this, because when I was cleaning out the CWC-ism navigation template, I've noticed that a few of the items weren't actual CWC-isms, like "Heart Level", since Chris never called anything his "Heart Level", it's just a colloquialism trolls throw around to refer to Chris' "shattered" heart. If anything, "shattered heart" seems like the real CWC-ism. [[User:PsychoNerd054|PsychoNerd054]] ([[User talk:PsychoNerd054|talk]]) 24 November 2017

::Could you delete the Al-Qaedas redirect page?

== Patreon ==

Do you think we should add a Patreon tracker, or, like, a list of how much people are pledging to him at the beginning of each month (when they get charged) to the Patreon page? -[[User:GhostofKittyChandler|GhostofKittyChandler]] ([[User talk:GhostofKittyChandler|talk]]) 18:15, 19 November 2017 (UTC)

*The stats are on [https://graphtreon.com/creator/Sonichu Graphtreon]. We could link to that. Manually updating a list on the CWCki might work, but would need someone entering in the number every month. Some tried with the Patreon entry in [[Chris and money#Fan Funding]] but it ended up out of date. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 22:35, 19 November 2017 (UTC)

**I'll totally update it per month, I love having shit to do on a monthly basis. I'll see if I can get all the numbers from the first of each month since he started his Patreon and make a graph on the page, too. -[[User:GhostofKittyChandler|GhostofKittyChandler]] ([[User talk:GhostofKittyChandler|talk]]) 01:13, 20 November 2017 (UTC)

:Nice work on the Patreon list. Interesting to see his total profit. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 22:02, 20 November 2017 (UTC)

==About Marvin==

I am a little out of the loop, but who is Marvin? I know he kind of owns the site, but what is his user name? Since you are the most knowledgeable user in this site, can you tell me? -[[User:Larry the Larryhog|Larry the Larryhog]] 0:53, 6 December 2017 (UTC)

*Marvin is one of Chris's trolls. He played the [[Man in the Pickle Suit]] during the Emily date. He's also been involved behind-the-scenes with trolling Chris. And yeah, he owns the CWCki - his username here is [[User:Canine|Canine]]. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 02:49, 6 December 2017 (UTC)

==An Important Question==

Who is in control of the icons? The cwcki needs icons for Jessica Quinn and additional shirts. Who can I talk to? -[[User:Larry the Larryhog|Larry the Larryhog]] 22:34, 15 December 2017 (UTC)
*I think that someone just needs to make them. For example, the Financhu Crisis didn't have an icon until I made one. -[[User:Windows OS|Windows OS]] ([[User talk:Windows OS|talk]]) 22:26, 15 December 2017 (UTC)

== Good work! ==

Good work on putting up the [[MAGfest]] article so quickly! (And also thank you for just generally all your work on the site.) --[[User:Holdek|Holdek]] ([[User talk:Holdek|talk]]) 19:07, 7 January 2018 (UTC)

*Thank you. I was just the first to start the MAGfest page - it had other contributors, too. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 08:09, 8 January 2018 (UTC)

==Idea Guy's Identity==

Now that we know who is the Idea Guy, we should update Da Update. -[[User:Larry the Larryhog|Larry the Larryhog]] ([[User talk:Larry the Larryhog|talk]]) 22:52, 22 January 2018 (UTC)

==Vandalizer present==

Goes by the name of desudesudesu. It would be nice if he was banned. -[[User:Larry the Larryhog|Larry the Larryhog]] ([[User talk:Larry the Larryhog|talk]]) 01:33, 27 January 2018 (UTC)
:: If you are here please ban Bobchanman, he has been wreaking havoc for hours. -[[User:Larry the Larryhog|Larry the Larryhog]] ([[User talk:Larry the Larryhog|talk]]) 13:37, 9 March 2018 (UTC)

*Yeah, he's banned. He was Ironpervhunter's alt, btw. I'll check up here a bit more in case he tries again. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 18:58, 9 March 2018 (UTC)

==On Da Update and other concerns==

What constitute as worthy news for Da Update? Can it be from minor updates on Chris from Kiwi Farms? Also [https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Talk:Sonichu_the_Animated_Series this message] worries me as I am the creator of the current Sonichu TAS page. Will this page be deleted and will I get banned for this? -[[User:Larry the Larryhog|Larry the Larryhog]] ([[User talk:Larry the Larryhog|talk]]) 22:23, 7 March 2018 (UTC)

I would personally relax about this. Champ's been retired for a long time and his deletion of the original TAS page came out of the blue (IIRC, no one was expecting it, not even the current admins of the website). Also, I actually do support the new TAS page as I have believed that the deletion of the original page left a gaping whole in the wiki. My message was made just to make sure people know about what happened.

tl;dr: Relax.

-[[User:Windows OS|Windows OS]] ([[User talk:Windows OS|talk]]) 23:57, 7 March 2018 (UTC)

*Minor updates are fine for Da Update. Nah, you won't get banned for making the Sonichu TAS page. I don't intend to delete it. Champthom could, but like Windows OS said, he's retired. The page was originally deleted because years ago, articles about fan works were cluttering the wiki, even though Chris himself hadn't reacted to them. TAS seems to be popular though, so I think we can make an exception for it, much like the Documentary had a page long before Chris talked about it. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 00:34, 8 March 2018 (UTC)

==Issues with the Picture of the Now==
I tried to resize the Picture of the Now to 200px, however [[Template:Picture_of_the_now|this happened]]. How do I fix this? -[[User:Larry the Larryhog|Larry the Larryhog]] ([[User talk:Larry the Larryhog|talk]]) 01:46, 4 April 2018 (UTC)

*That's weird. Same thing happened with the Cherokee Clan page. I resized it to 150 instead and that seemed to work. Maybe some issue with the cache or something. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 05:10, 4 April 2018 (UTC)

== Burnout Paradise Twitch Stream ==

Has anyone archived the Burnout Paradise twitch stream? [[User:Makuchi|Makuchi]] ([[User talk:Makuchi|talk]]) 20:19, 17 April 2018 (UTC)

:I don't believe so, no. Best we have are highlights.[[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 23:19, 17 April 2018 (UTC)

::Well that sucks. Another piece of Christory now gone. [[User:Makuchi|Makuchi]] ([[User talk:Makuchi|talk]]) 00:30, 17 April 2018 (UTC)

== Chris has a boyfriend ==
Someone in talks with Chris posted a [https://media.8ch.net/file_store/4239312ed2e37937579c2f4dcd0912e6c82194ec4ab0476e37fc433749d3ca0f.jpg screencapped convo on /cow/ regarding the blowjob thing]. Apparently one of his two sweethearts is in fact a man and Chris has given him oral sex before. I have no idea where to put this. [[User:DirtyCrappedMiniskirt|DirtyCrappedMiniskirt]] ([[User talk:DirtyCrappedMiniskirt|talk]]) 22:49, 26 April 2018 (UTC)

*There's a page for the new sweethearts - [[Unknown 2018 sweethearts]] - though I see someone has already added the info from that link. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 01:13, 27 April 2018 (UTC)

==More Idea Guys==
Since Null revealed three more Idea Guys, one of them is Stephen Boyd, I say we should add them now. However, should we rework the Idea Guy article to fit them? -[[User:Larry the Larryhog|Larry the Larryhog]] ([[User talk:Larry the Larryhog|talk]]) 17:04, 13 July 2018 (UTC)

*My only advice is to be careful with phrasing. The media, as an example, uses words like "alleged" when discussing cases which haven't resolved in court for liability reasons. And in Null's post, he noted that it's unclear whether that person is one of the Idea Guys or not. You should ask [[User:Canine|Canine]] for his opinion, since he owns the CWCki. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 03:16, 14 July 2018 (UTC)

== Which reversed videos to remove from the site ==

So, around yesterday, I got a bit of negative attention over the reversed videos that I was posting on the fan videos sections of various wikis, namely the ones on [[Send Me to Too Many Games Convention]], [[I need some local C64 Tech Help, Please]], and [[My Mother WORKED Hard, Spent Hard; Needs Money NOW]]. Which of the other reversed video can I remove from this site (since I did remove some at some point in time)? [[User:Makuchi]] 18:18, 22 July 2018 (UTC)

*Fan videos ought to contribute something new to the CWCki. Usually they spoof Chris, draw parallels, or reflect his viewer's perception. Here is a [[DoopieDoOver#Fan Video|prime example]] of such a fan video. Simply reversing Chris's videos isn't entertaining or necessary. The creator doesn't provide any commentary on what Chris is doing, so it's entirely redundant. I would recommend removing every reversed video. The only exceptions I would make is when they provide a [[TooManyGames#Fan Videos|timeline]] or when [[U8C43P2A37A8 y U8C1N023V0L|Chris is speaking backwards.]] Anything short of this ought to be removed immediately.--[[User:Galilean|Galilean]] ([[User talk:Galilean|talk]]) 22:09, 23 July 2018 (UTC)

**I did try removing some of the videos months ago but several users here liked it or thought that they were notable enough that they undid the removals. I'll probably do this on a case-by-case basis. If it has less than 250 views then I'll have it removed, unless it's notable enough (i.e. the [[Magical Man Potion]] reversed video). [[User:Makuchi]] 23:16, 23 July 2018 (UTC)

== Q&A category ==

Do we have a category for Q&A articles that don't directly involve Chris? Uncategorised articles include [[Doopie Q&A]] and [[Idea Guy Q&A]].
--[[User:Rossticus|Rossticus]] ([[User talk:Rossticus|talk]]) 16:37, 25 July 2018 (UTC)

*I don't believe so. Those were named after [[Ivy Q&A]], and the categories for that are for the saga itself and [[:Category:Historical Documents]]. Feel free to make a new category if you'd like. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 20:18, 25 July 2018 (UTC)

==Twitter blocks==

Thanks for doing the pretty formatting! it is looking really nice! --[[User:DPS2004|DPS2004]] ([[User talk:DPS2004|talk]]) 20:09, 24 January 2019 (UTC)

== Heya ==

I left a message for you on CWCki Club, hope you can read it. --[[User:FromtheWordsofBR|FromtheWordsofBR]] ([[User talk:FromtheWordsofBR|talk]]) 21:47, 19 February 2019 (UTC)

== Feedback: skip captcha for legitimate users ==

Hi there, on a serious note, the reCaptcha service is becoming annoying for legitimate contributors who have to use a VPN for one reason or another, like me.

I thought it would not hurt to ask if there can be a usergroup for skipping the captcha, or that the Autoconfirmed users group can be reconfigured to skip the captcha (the syntax being <code><nowiki>$wgGroupPermissions['autoconfirmed']['skipcaptcha'] = true;</nowiki></code>), and only contain users who have made 10 edits and have been registered for 7 days (the syntax being <code><nowiki>$wgAutoConfirmAge = 604800;</nowiki></code> and <code><nowiki>$wgAutoConfirmCount = 10;</nowiki></code>). Sorry for sounding technical, because I also run a MediaWiki-powered site.

Best regards, --[[User:Little Owl|Little Owl]] ([[User talk:Little Owl|talk]]) 11:40, 17 April 2019 (UTC)

: Try asking [[User:Canine|Canine]]. He's the owner and admin of the CWCki. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 06:11, 18 April 2019 (UTC)

== Recovering lost audio recordings ==

Hey, I figure you'd be able to help since you've been involved much longer than I have; do you know anyone who would have copies of the [[Chris Sex Logs]]? I've only been able to find one clip available online, with the all the other uploads being broken. Thanks! [[User:Thnxbb|Thnxbb]] ([[User talk:Thnxbb|talk]]) 07:07, 19 April 2019 (UTC)

:I'm not sure, I'll ask a couple people. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 09:29, 20 April 2019 (UTC)

== Case screenshot names ==

Hello,

It’s me with another suggestion: I think we could rename all the court record images to follow a standard naming format, something like "2011 Game Place Case (Barbara, GC11008911-00).png" or "2014 Pepper Spray Case (GC14017724-00).png", and then categorise them all under “Court records” to make it easy for all of us to figure out the source for all the debts. I’ve already started generating the screenshots using the Firefox developer tools, 800 pixels wide with no sidebar, although I preferred to keep the header for sake of authenticity and authority.

Best regards, --[[User:Little Owl|Little Owl]] ([[User talk:Little Owl|talk]]) 19:15, 7 May 2019 (UTC)

:Good idea. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 14:37, 8 May 2019 (UTC)
::Sorry if this is a bit long, but here is the suggested file names for the cases I have been able to locate. Unfortunately, there are a few that I cannot locate about four (?) others in the court records, [http://cwcki.club/index.php?threads/finding-some-old-court-records.2062/ as explained] in the CWCki Club thread:

::* 2011 Game Place Case (Barbara, CR12000095-01).png
::* 2011 Game Place Case (Barbara, CR12000095-02).png
::* 2011 Game Place Case (Barbara, GC11008911-00).png
::* 2011 Game Place Case (Barbara, GT11008910-00).png
::* 2011 Game Place Case (Chris, CR12000096-01).png
::* 2011 Game Place Case (Chris, GC11008942-00).png
::* 2011 Game Place Case (Chris, GC11008943-00).png
::* 2011 Game Place Case (Chris, GT11008941-00).png
::* 2014 Pepper Spray Case (GC14017724-00).png
::* 2016 Debt Case (GV16000107-00).png
::* 2016 Debt Case (GV16000416-00).png
::* 2016 Dog Case (GC16003018-00).png
::* 2016 Dog Case (GC16003019-00).png
::* 2017 Debt Case (GV17004097-00).png
::* 2018 Debt Case (GV18000392-00).png
::* 2018 Debt Case (GV18000451-00).png
::* 2018 Mall Trespass Case (Part 1, GC18004278-00).png
::* 2018 Mall Trespass Case (Part 2, GC18003632-00).png
::* 2019 Debt Case (GV19000149-00).png
::* 2019 Debt Case (GV19000217-00).png

::Again, sorry for the hurry, --[[User:Little Owl|Little Owl]] ([[User talk:Little Owl|talk]]) 14:54, 8 May 2019 (UTC)

::I think it'd be good to specify the creditors/who is being sued for the debt cases (i.e., 2016 Debt Case (Barbara vs Discover Bank, GV16000107-00). As for the missing files, I guess they were purged from the records after a time. The [https://sonichu.com/cwcki/28_October_2011#Screenshots screenshots] show they were originally filed under Charlottesville's Civil court.[[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 14:19, 9 May 2019 (UTC)
Hello, I agree in adding the creditor to the file name to make better sense of who is the creditor, bearing in mind that I do not wish for the file name to be too long. In any case, I created [[User:Little Owl/Sandbox|a sandbox]] to refine the new file naming scheme. --[[User:Little Owl|Little Owl]] ([[User talk:Little Owl|talk]]) 15:56, 9 May 2019 (UTC)
: I think I got the file name format in place (see my sandbox): any thoughts? I also note that some files can be merged, such as [[:File:Mariner Finance vs Chris.png]] and [[:File:20170824 Mariner verdict.png]]: this is because no information is deleted as the case progresses. --[[User:Little Owl|Little Owl]] ([[User talk:Little Owl|talk]]) 22:20, 15 May 2019 (UTC)

::Looks good. Only suggestions I have are that Barb's debt case is Capital One Bank, and case#GC18003632-00 could be named "2018 Mall Trespass Case (Therapeutic Docket record)" or something. Agree about merging files. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 17:25, 17 May 2019 (UTC)

== Move request ==

Can you kindly rename [[:File:SchuComicJargon.jpg|this file]] to “File:Sonichu - Jargon Page.jpg” without leaving a redirect?

Uploaded in March 2011, this is the closest to the original size, and I will be using it to replace duplicates, such as [[:File:E1p1.jpg|this file]].

I think we are going to need to develop a file name and category structure for the Sonichu pages, given that some stories were “reprinted”.

Regards, --[[User:Little Owl|Little Owl]] ([[User talk:Little Owl|talk]]) 17:26, 24 May 2019 (UTC)

== Better scans of Issues 12-9 and 16 ==

Do you think you could re-scan issues 12-9 and 16 for posterity's sake? I'm sorry but the scans cut off at the edges and at the center margins. One way you might be able to get better scans is to take an X-ACTO and cut carefully through the jacket by the inside margin to get the individual and then scan them from there; this way you lay the pages flat against the scanner and get a higher quality scan. Thanks for scanning in the first play by the way. --[[User:Finnegan|Finnegan]] ([[User talk:Finnegan|talk]]) 01:33, 18 June 2019 (UTC)

:Oh, I wasn't the one who scanned them - my friend did. I don't think he'd go for splitting the books apart since he's a collector. He used a portable scanner to get the pages, not sure if he has a flatbed scanner. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 16:15, 19 June 2019 (UTC)

== Is everything all right? ==

I noticed that since yesterday, you have reversed ''a lot'' of your own edits to the CWCki, marking all your self-reversals as minor. Is everything all right? [[User:ChanOfTartary|ChanOfTartary]] ([[User talk:ChanOfTartary|talk]]) 20:21, 25 October 2019 (UTC)
::It was a technical mishap that was accidental. Hurtful said that in the Main Page discussion. -[[User:Larry the Larryhog|Larry the Larryhog]] ([[User talk:Larry the Larryhog|talk]]) 20:23, 25 October 2019 (UTC)
::Yeah, turned out to have been from an app I tried a while back and forgot about. Accidentally opened it the other day while I had the Recent Changes tab open and it hit all the Rollback buttons there simultaneously. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 20:24, 26 October 2019 (UTC)
== Sorry ==
I am really sorry for using British spelling, I thought american english was just dropping all the vowels and saying yee-haw. In another note, for my Chris and biology article, I would like to refer to a textbook from the Virginia education board. I have no idea how burger school system worls and would like to know about when they start teaching biology and what they teach in it. Thanks a ton! - [[User:Klop|Your friendly neighbourhood [[User:Klop]]]] ([[User talk:Klop|talk]]) 16:29, 31 May 2020 (UTC)

::No worries. Wish I could help on the Biology stuff. I think it differs depending on school districts, but it can be a high school class taken as an elective. Dunno if that's what Chris's school had. But Chris didn't learn anything from school anyway, he just slept through it and pulls his beliefs out of his ass, like the Recycling thing. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 09:51, 1 June 2020 (UTC)
:: Nah its fine, I was having doubts on wether to make the article or not as it will only serve as a place for correcting Chris and won't add anything new about him. But it will be a fun to go through all the nonsense he has said. (Atleast, its fun for me). So should I go ahead with it or not? - [[User:Klop|Your friendly neighbourhood Klop]] ([[User talk:Klop|talk]]) 10:15, 1 June 2020 (UTC)

::That's a good point. Personally I think we might have too many Chris And articles and that those should be kept to subjects most relevant to understanding Chris. Otherwise we end up with articles like Politics which are an odd fit when Chris isn't into politics, he just hated one political figure. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 09:15, 2 June 2020 (UTC)

==Calendar==
I worked out how the calendar works, its [[User:Klop/sandbox2|here]]. I'm not sure how to make it into an article, so I need some help. Any ideas? - [[User:Klop|klop <-- fag]] ([[User talk:Klop|talk]]) 04:15, 22 July 2020 (UTC)

:Nice. Looks finished to me. Maybe just add the Sonichu template and file it under the Plot Devices section. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 04:51, 22 July 2020 (UTC)

==Seasonal intro banner==
Can I add another seasonal intro banner? this one about the tianmen square massacre on june 24. It will have Punchy say something like "Absolutely nothing happend in Tianmen Square this date in 1989. This is my creators wiki and nothing less". - [[User:Klop|klop <-- fag]] ([[User talk:Klop|talk]]) 10:43, 24 July 2020 (UTC)

:Sounds funny, sure. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 11:06, 24 July 2020 (UTC)

== The Miscreants ==

I saw that you turned the page to The Miscreants into a redirect for to [[Trolls]]. I feel like it's a worthwhile article to have, or at least as a subsection to the Trolls article, because it covers a very specific set of people from Christory. Would it be possible to reinstate it in some capacity? [[User:KingClark|KingClark]] ([[User talk:KingClark|talk]]) 21:17, 7 September 2020 (UTC)

:Fair point. I'll add a condensed version to the Trolls article. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 22:55, 7 September 2020 (UTC)

::I think that it would work as a subsection of the "Classic Era Trolls" bit. Not all trolls from that era associated with them, but the ones that were are among Chris's most infamous tormentors.

::Looking at an [https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Template:Trolls&oldid=76481 old version of Trolls template], it seems they're basically the same as the Classic Era Trolls. At one point the sweetheart people like Blanca and Julie were [https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Template:Trolls&oldid=13752 on the list too] until they got moved to their own template. So maybe a way to do this would be to summarize The Miscreants as a description for the Classic Era Trolls heading. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 05:54, 8 September 2020 (UTC)

== Deleting A Page ==

Hey, there's a template [[Template White Tomgirl with Heart Design|here]] that doesn't fit the mold of the others and is redundant overall. Can you delete it? You seem to be on here a lot, so I figured that I'd ask. [[User:KingClark|KingClark]] ([[User talk:KingClark|talk]]) 07:33, 29 September 2020 (UTC)

:Deleted it. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 15:38, 29 September 2020 (UTC)

== [[Sonic World]] Discord ==

Turns out that someone tried to harass the admin of the Sonic World DX Discord into banning Chris, via their private Instagram account. How should we cover this? --[[User:Little Owl|Little Owl]] ([[User talk:Little Owl|talk]]) 10:12, 20 December 2020 (UTC)

*Admin's reason for banning sounds valid. Even if the ween got the admin's attention first, it's not much different than someone getting reported and an admin looking into the matter. Unless the PMs show admin being on the fence about banning, it's probably not relevant to mention. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 10:51, 20 December 2020 (UTC)

== DYK help. ==

Hello there. I attempted to adjust the DYK template, but in the process it seems like I've just messed up the formatting, and it won't refresh to show anything other than a very specific group. Since you last seemed to fix the problem, I was wondering if you could help with the one that I unwittingly created, and possibly help me understand what I did wrong with adjusting things. [[User:KingClark|KingClark]] ([[User talk:KingClark|talk]]) 10:04, 10 August 2021 (UTC)
:I can't tell what the issue is. The formatting seems fine, though. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 14:32, 10 August 2021 (UTC)
::The issue on my end is that the facts don't seem to change when you refresh the page, nor does it show all of groups of facts when I tried looking around - it only shows a specific range of options, while outright skipping the entire first selection. Basically, the entire template seems "off" and I can't determine what's wrong with it. [[User:KingClark|KingClark]] ([[User talk:KingClark|talk]]) 20:48, 10 August 2021 (UTC)

== Would you be able to fix this error? ==

This page looks different when you are logged out versus when you are logged in: https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Category:Ongoing_events --Actualautist 17:21, 11 August 2021 (UTC)
:: Also, why is my signature... --Actualautist 17:23, 11 August 2021 (UTC)

:Sorry, I can't do anything about it, don't have access to the software. It's been an issue for years that the templates and categories have sync issues. Also you can put the signature by pressing ~ four times. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 22:19, 11 August 2021 (UTC)

== Kyle suicide baiting & other Watchmen stuff ==

I am not sure of the proper Wiki etiquette but I left some comments on the relevant talk page. With all due respect though given your closeness to these folks though you might not be the best person to make the decisions on what negative material stays and what is redacted although some of your concerns are legitimate in my mind. It's a serious accusation and the ''more'' serious accusation that I left off we have no evidence for but for the fact that he was into this suicide stuff it's coming from his own mouth in his CWC-related Discord. [[User:SpookyBones|SpookyBones]] ([[User talk:SpookyBones|talk]]) 18:26, 23 October 2021 (UTC)

== Re:Da Update ==

Do we really need three entries for what is essentially one thing (Kengle summarising the newest Chris letter)? Why is the date when he received the letter, for example, relevant? ―[[User:KUG.SIG17|KUG.SIG17]] ([[User talk:KUG.SIG17|talk]]) 15:04, 30 May 2022 (UTC)

:Good point, thanks. Reduced it to one entry. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 20:56, 30 May 2022 (UTC)

== This page i made good? ==

https://sonichu.com/cwcki/User:Thegibuspryo/CWCVille_Rebellion [[User:Thegibuspryo|Thegibuspryo]] ([[User talk:Thegibuspryo|talk]]) 16:14, 21 January 2023 (EST)

:Looks like a good start. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 20:05, 22 January 2023 (EST)

== Birthday banner ==

I wonder if this year's birthday banner should be a bit more poignant, considering the sad state of Chris's life now (no-one but imaginary friends, and a very few stronghold supporters)? If so, what could be changed? --[[User:Little Owl|Little Owl]] ([[User talk:Little Owl|talk]]) 13:50, 17 February 2023 (EST)

:You mean [[:File:Birthday Boy.png]]? Personally I think it's still fitting. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 18:56, 17 February 2023 (EST)
::I posted a prototype of what I was thinking at the #cwcki channel of the official Discord server. A scene from ''Stark Raving Dad'' of the Simpsons influenced the idea. --[[User:Little Owl|Little Owl]] ([[User talk:Little Owl|talk]]) 21:54, 18 February 2023 (EST)

== Template:TV ==

There are a lot of articles that could be added, just look at Category:Television shows and Category:Video Games. I don't feel like putting in the labour of adding them all in though. [[User:Mangolover887|Mangolover887]] ([[User talk:Mangolover887|talk]]) 08:18, 9 April 2023 (EDT)

== any help? ==

considering chris will be returning to the internet some day soon, is there anything that we can prepare in the beforehand? i've started archiving kf links while it's on onion, but i was wondering if there's anything that's been overdue for a while that i can do <3 -- [[User:VoDKa|VoDKa]] ([[User talk:VoDKa|talk]]) 12:33, 25 May 2023 (EDT)

:There are some active projects. Like, info from Chris's old Discord chats need to be added to articles, there are several stub articles that need expanding, the cwchronology pages are being converted to use references instead of linking, and as you mentioned the archival of KF links. I was thinking of adding some text on the Main Page summarizing this. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 06:49, 26 May 2023 (EDT)

== Thanks, and take care. ==

Hello, I have to retire as a jerkop at this time due to RL, which means I am no longer as active as I used to be during the COVID-19 pandemic. Although life marches on, it's been an honour to help out on the wiki. --[[User:Little Owl|Little Owl]] ([[User talk:Little Owl|talk]]) 23:29, 14 November 2023 (EST)
:Thanks for your contributions here! I'll remove you from the jerkop group, let me know if you'd like to be added again. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 14:34, 15 November 2023 (EST)

== OfficialCWCmart 2021 Lost Commissions ==

I think reformatting might have to be done on the [[2021 Lost Commissions]] article to include the new pictures with Chris for the Chris Chan and Tyler, Jasmen's Jazzercise Pony, and Jazzy's Fursona drawings (which I have already uploaded to the CWCki). You can decide how to change it. [[User:Ayumu Kasuga|Ayumu Kasuga]] ([[User talk:Ayumu Kasuga|talk]]) 16:03, 8 November 2024 (EST)

The new "Portal Workings" piece has three pictures of Chris to be added there as well (files already uploaded). [[User:Ayumu Kasuga|Ayumu Kasuga]] ([[User talk:Ayumu Kasuga|talk]]) 16:05, 8 November 2024 (EST)

:Cool, nice work. I guess what we could do is tack on a "Gallery" section at the end of 2021 Lost Commissions for those selfie photos. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 01:55, 9 November 2024 (EST)

==Watchmen members mention==
Is it alright if I give you a section in the [[Watchmen members]] article? You were name-dropped by Geno Samuel in his documentary when he introduced them, and you're still leaking stuff from [[The Place]] sometimes. I also think [[User:PsychoNerd054|Pyscho]] would probably agree and possibly want to include it in his template. [[User:Ayumu Kasuga|Ayumu Kasuga]] ([[User talk:Ayumu Kasuga|talk]]) 09:40, 12 March 2025 (EDT)
:I'm not sure if I count as a member. Marvin and Null were in The Place as well but I'm also unsure about counting them as Watchmen. [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 23:40, 12 March 2025 (EDT)
::As for me...I also don't quite think Hurtful counts as a Watchman, either. All he really did was lurk in The Place server, and replied to some of their messages every now and again. He didn't actually do what the others set out to do, deflecting enablers from Chris. [[User:PsychoNerd054|Psycho 🐧]] ([[User talk:PsychoNerd054|talk]]) 23:41, 12 March 2025 (EDT)
:::Yeah, I wouldn't say you were a "Watchmen member" as in partaking in their activities or whatever, but the term says it describes members of The Place Discord. Maybe just a mention on the [[Watchmen]] page itself would be better? What do you think? [[User:Ayumu Kasuga|Ayumu Kasuga]] ([[User talk:Ayumu Kasuga|talk]]) 17:48, 13 March 2025 (EDT)
::::You do bring an interesting point on what qualifies as a "Watchman". As of late, I've been trying to redefine the "Watchmen Saga", and splitting chunks of it off into smaller sagas, (So far there's the [[:Template:CrystalgateSaga|Crystalgate]] and [[:Template:LainchuSaga|Lainchu]] sagas) as that was getting very bloated and should really cover the important happenings in The Place and their raids, and I believe a part of that is also going to be pinpointing what qualifies as a "Watchmen" too, as the current definition is too broad.

::::As for your proposal to mention Hurtful, maybe just mention that he was lurking there, and that he's been leaking things from that server. Wait for Hurtful to okay this before you do, though. [[User:PsychoNerd054|Psycho 🐧]] ([[User talk:PsychoNerd054|talk]]) 18:17, 13 March 2025 (EDT)
::::I have no issue with it. The Watchmen members page isn't worded well but is meant to refer to Watchmen members in The Place and related servers (as opposed to for example Chris who was also a member of the servers). [[User:Hurtful Truth Level|Hurtful Truth Level]] ([[User talk:Hurtful Truth Level|talk]]) 05:03, 15 March 2025 (EDT)

== Refreshing Maintenance Special Pages ==

It's been a while since I edit the CWCki and I forgot who owns it now but if you know who, can you tell the owner to please refresh the maintenance pages? I noticed they were last updated 3 years ago and it would be good to deal with the likes of broken redirects and such, etc. Thanks. [[User:Alan Pardew|Alan Pardew]] ([[User talk:Alan Pardew|talk]]) 10:51, 9 May 2025 (EDT)

CWCki:Administrators

2025-05-09T14:29:44Z

Alan Pardew: Not anymore lmao

People who administrate things. Originally just cogsdev.

As of July 2020, your friendly CWCki admins are:

* <S> [[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] - day to day stuff, usually regarding style and editing policy. Master of bots. Undoer of vandalism.</s> Inactive

* [[User:Canine|Canine]] - mostly handles technical issues (database things and whatnot).

* <S> [[User:Champthom|Champthom]] - day to day issues, regarding policy and issues are resolved smoothly. </s> Inactive

* [[User:Alan Pardew|Alan Pardew]]

[[Category:CWCki policy]]

October 2015 Facebook Posts

2025-05-09T09:12:40Z

Alan Pardew: /* Introducing Dr. Ren Skysoar */ The Retcon page barely mentions the Skysoar page so would be more appropriate to link it to the actual article which has the pages.

This page covers Chris's activity on his personal [[Facebook]] page in [[October 2015]]. He also returned to his protest group, [[FIX SONIC'S ARMS IMMEDIATELY, SEGA!!!]], to close the book on this saga.

==Summary==
* 1 October - Chris offers [[Amiibo]] to trade on a collector site.
* 3 October - Chris is considering making an [[autism]] Amiibo.
* 4 October - Chris gets [[List of places that have banned Chris|banned]] from the Facebook collector site.
* 4 October - Chris tells [[William Elliott Waterman]] that they look nothing alike.
* 8 October - Chris provides a checklist of his current and planned Amiibo.
* 9 October - Chris [[Chris and remorse|apologizes]] for showing hostility towards a fan in public.
* 9 October - Chris plans a [[jerkop]] Amiibo and provides some backstory on the relationship between [[Slaweel Ryam]] and [[Count Graduon]].
* 15 October - Chris links to a [[Super Smash Bros. Videos#CWC vs Autism|Super Smash Bros. video]] and defends his play style.
* 16 October - The autism Amiibo is unveiled.
* 17 October - Chris displays new versions of the [[Angelica]] Amiibo.
* 18 October - Chris begins a contest to guess the name of a new [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]] character.
* 20 October - The new character is announced, a replacement for [[Robotnik]].
* 23 October - Chris writes that new [[Sonichu 11|Sonichu #11]] pages will be revealed the coming weekend.
* 26 October - On a busy day, Chris uploads the new Sonichu #11 pages, announces the sale of a print version of [[Sonichu 1|Sonichu #1]], links to a [[Thank You from Christine Chandler|video]] thanking his fans, and reveals two new Amiibo prototypes.
* 28 October - Chris tacks on two new pages to the end of Sonichu #1, revealing that [[Sonic]] and [[Amy Rose]] are not TRUE and HONEST.
* 30 October - Chris remarks on a video purporting to show that Super Smash Bros. is an [[autism|autistic]] game.
* 31 October - Chris posts new art showing his Sonichu characters dressed up for [[Halloween]].

==Chris's Posts==

===Autism Amiibo===
{{quotebox|3 October 2015
[[File:Mii 8.jpg|left|200px|thumb]]
New Offer on the [[Etsy|Cwcville Shopping Site]]: Enter Coupon Code: FREENUM0BOOK, upon checkout to receive a Free copy of [[Sonichu 0|Sonichu Comic Book #0]] with purchase of any of my Custom Amiibo Figures (MUST purchase both a figure AND the book on the same transaction in order to use the coupon code. Expires December 31, 2015).

I am considering making a Custom Amiibo Figure of my perception of the face of the mental condition [[Autism]]. **NOTE: the face is NOT of any individual person or persons, nor and especially NOT of any person, living or deceased, who has, or had, suffered from Autism of any form. The figure will be made directly with a single Mii Brawler Amiibo figure. Also, on the additional difference, I would fully promise to donate the $10 of each figure sold towards Autism Awareness at my local Virginia Institute of Autism to help the children and adults, aside from Mii, :), who suffer from the social ability-degrading mental condition.

If this post receives at least 100 "Likes" before Tuesday, October 6, I will move forward with the idea, and make a listing on my shop on Etsy of the figure. http://www.etsy.com/shop/CwcvilleShopping.

Thank You.

<nowiki>**</nowiki>Disclaimer: the Prototype of the Autism Mii figure has not yet been made, and an image of the figure will be uploaded after its creation.}}

Chris also posted this on the "Autism Awareness" page as a visitor.

===Amiibo Checklist===
{{quotebox|8 October 2015
I will make a picture checklist of my figures in the near future, but in the meantime, I will type it out.

I also feel it advisable to point out an obvious fact that some may have missed in all this: These Figures May be the ONLY Official Sonichu and Rosechu Figures I will be able to make ever. And these should Not only be appreciated for their Collectability, but also for their playability in Imagination and actual Play Time (with regard to the caution that should a portion break or fall off, it should be reattached, carefully, with Krazy Glue.

Now then, a current-to-my-knowledge Official (updatable)(non-picture) Checklist of Sonichu, Rosechu and CWC (Amiibo) Figures (regardless of figure base chips, or alternate variations).

Collect Them All!!!

Wave One

001 - [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]]

002 - [[Rosechu]]

003 - [[Blake|Blake Sonichu]]

004 - [[Wild Sonichu]]

005 - [[Bubbles Rosechu]]

006 - [[Angelica Rosechu]]

007 - [[Punchy Sonichu]]

008 - [[Magi-Chan Sonichu]]

009 - [[Christian Weston Chandler|(Pre-2011) Christian Weston Chandler]]

010 - [[Chris Chan Sonichu]]

011 - [[Christian Weston Chandler|(Post-2011) Christine Weston Chandler]]

Wave 2

012 - [[Slaweel Ryam]]

013 - [[Count Graduon]]

014 - [[Cera Rosechu]]

015 - [[Christine Rosechu]]

016 - [[Robbie Sonichu]]

017 - [[Simonla Rosechu]]

018 - [[Sandy Rosechu]]

019 - [[Zapina Rosechu]]

020 - [[Silvana Rosechu]]

021 - [[jerkops|Jerkop/Janekop]]

Wave 3

022 - [[Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc]]

023 - [[Metal Sonichu]]

Bonus/Extra (and undecided at the moment) Figures

??? - Autism Mii

??? - [[Barbara Weston Chandler]]

??? - [[Robert Franklin Chandler Jr.]]}}

===Chris Gets Spooked===
{{quotebox|9 October 2015
I am typing this up right now to make a valid point. I was out shopping a bit, and there was rain and distant lightning spooking me. Out of nowhere, just as I was getting out of [[Son-Chu|my car]], someone from a red car Shouts, "I love you, Chris Chan!" It spooks the crap out of me! I already had a LOT on my mind, and I did not care for the loud surprise, and after five seconds, because I felt offense at being shocked by the scare, I gave the finger as I was going into the store. While I realize it was wrong of me to give the bird, it does stand that while other people do have other things going on in their minds at the time, no one should ever shout at a person unexpectedly without a greeting prior. Had I have the warning, the verbal gesture could have received a more positive, less offensive, response. [[Chris and remorse|I apologize]] to that person in the red car for giving the bird in response.
}}

A gal-pal recommended:

{{quoteboxred|I think you should feel honored someone recognized ya, hun!}}

Chris replied:

{{quotebox|Yeah, but initially, it WA/ as heavy a shocker at the time it could have sparked a freaking Heart Attack.}}

===[[Jerkop]] Amiibo===
{{quotebox|9 October 2015
Announcement/Update:

Update Your Checklists, as I have just done so. I have decided to definitely add the Jerkop/Janekop into the Sonichu and Rosechu figure set. AND these will be practically, but not literally, "a dime a dozen". I have decided to use Mario or Luigi Amiibo Figures for their bases, and already being Human Forme, I won't require a secondary figure for these.

AND, the disposable Jerkop/Janekop...**Story Detail Piece** ahead, and possibly **SPOILER ALERT!**...

Are considered in reality without individual identity, and here is why...

Originally, while Graduon was still ensphered and wielded by Slaweel, the people were brainwashed and under remote mind control. Being confined and without a body, Graduon's powers were limited, whereas With a body of his own, he could do as bad as reverse aging on deceased bodies, then import a small portion of his (magically) regenerating soul into the soul less bodies and amass his army/crew of soldiers. And without identities, they would literally be a neutral character set in any event. That is Why Jerkops and Janekops would be considered, not literally, disposably a dime per dozen.

After the prototype(s) have been made, a new listing will be created for them.

Also, Definite SPOILER ALERT...

After possession of the metal body, Graduon does not bust Slaweel out of jail, nor enlist her for his new regime.

[[File:GraduonAmiibo.jpg|200px|left]]
[[File:CrowdofJerkops.jpg|300px|right]]
[[File:SlaweelAmiibo.jpg|200px|center]]}}

William wrote:

{{quoteboxgreen|I think the animal crossing villager has a closer resemblance to jerkops.}}

Chris responded:

{{quotebox|I agree, but the Villager Amiibo figure is more difficult to come by. I can perform just as well with the tough edits on a Mario or Luigi, or Mii Brawler figure to make better resemblance to any Jerkop or Janekop. And between the Mario and Luigi figures, that does allow me to make more multiple customizable figures of a Jerkop or Janekop less expensively.}}

Another friend asked:

{{quoteboxred|Why isnt the standard jerkop black, like most of the others in your comic book?}}

Chris replied:

{{quotebox|You're thinking of the [[Jerkhief]] character. The majority of the Jerkops and Janekops are white, and Graduon does not discriminate in origins of the people and bodies; very diverse.}}

===Still Flogging the Amiibo===
Chris linked to [[Super Smash Bros. Videos#CWC vs Autism|one of his new videos]] and wrote:

{{quotebox|15 October 2015
Enjoy some Demo Videos of the Mii Characters available to play against with a figure that is able to feature that Mii in their Amiibo Base (this includes both Christian and Christine Chaldler [sic] figures, Autism, Slaweel Ryam and Count Graduon. And Jerkops/Janekops and [[Reldnahc Naitsirhc]] figures coming soon.

See details on each figure listing; Only on Cwcville Shopping on Etsy.com!}}

William offered a critique:

{{quoteboxgreen|Christine, I have a complaint about the battle; you made three alter-egos of yourself battle one stand-in for autism. A 3 against 1 battle is totally one-sided and unfair. Am I supposed to applaud you for ganging up on that autistic amiibo? You know what would be really impressive: Make 3 Autism amiibos at Maximum CPU level battle one Christine — yourself, the player, not another CPU — which will show the tremendous challenge of overcoming autism and your total awesomeness at succeeding to win the match! I want to see your mad Super Smash Bros. skills, girl! It would also be cool if future Sonichu comic fights had difficult adversaries to Sonichu and pals and they don't always win easily, if you get the hint. ;)}}

Chris replied:

{{quotebox|The point is to BEAT and Recover from Autism, so the symbolism of the battle is to the point and accurate towards the cause.}}

Billy tried again:

{{quoteboxgreen|You can be overpowered and still win. Did you read the ending of the fourth Harry Potter book where he had spider venom in his leg, loss of blood from a cut open wrist, was cruxiated by Voldemort, outnumbered by over a dozen adult death eater wizards, and still beat voldemort in a wizard duel? Then he managed to escape with his friend's body from the portkey, and that polyjuice'd death eater in disguise tried to kill him when he was down (after boring him to death with a long villain exposition speech to give dumbledore enough time to run in and stupefy his arse). That's a real heroic victory. It wouldn't be impressive if Harry just... used imperio on all his minions and ganged up on voldemort with dirty tricks. It would make him look like a villain.}}

Totally missing the point, all Chris had to say was:

{{quotebox|I hardly cared much for [[Harry Potter|the Potter]]. I never read the books or seen the movies.}}

Chris also completely side-stepped the circumstance that he was writing this immediately upon returning from court after being [[26 December 2014|convicted]].

===The Autism Amiibo Revealed===
[[File:AutismamiiboB.jpg|thumb|right|250px|A representation of autism, in more ways than one.]]
Chris linked to his Etsy page and wrote:

{{quotebox|16 October 2015
I've made the prototype figure for the Autism Mii. It comes with removable headband as featured in Super Smash Bros, covering its blushing cheeks underneath its eyes, and above its mustache and mouth. Its nose is on its chin.

Buy One Now to support Autism research and recovery in VA.

Also, use Promo Code: FREENUM0BOOK for a free copy of Sonichu Book #0 with purchase of this, or any figure. (Expires 12/31/2015; must have both in cart)}}
{{clear}}
===Now With Lumpier Breasts===
{{quotebox|17 October 2015
Check it out; I've figured out the alternate variations for the [[Angelica Rosechu]] figure, and it allowed me to reduce the price of the Palutena base version by $25, so any version of her is available for $50.00 plus shipping. Doesn't the Halo version look delightful? :)
[[File:NewAngelicaA.jpg|thumb|200px|left]]
[[File:NewAngelicaB.jpg|thumb|200px|right]]}}

===Fifty of These Goddamn Things===
{{quotebox|18 October 2015
[[File:SonichuRosechuAmiibo.jpg|250px|left|thumb]]
<nowiki>**</nowiki>A Golden Opportunity** Announcement!

I have just realized that on the Sonichu Amiibo Figures that I have made, we are closing in on the Fiftieth Sonichu Figure Made. There are a few more to go until then, but I have decided on an idea.

The Fiftieth Sonichu Figure will have its base, and the shoes, Totally Painted Gold (in lieu of the tradional Battery-Charge Blue). AND, as this will be the first milestone figure, the person who orders the Fiftieth Sonichu Figure, will also receive a Rosechu Figure, as a free one time bonus.

So, WHO will get Sonichu Number 50? It Could Be YOU.

Good Luck.}}

===The Answer is Pittsburgh Pirates===

{{quotebox|18 October 2015
Also, including in Book #1, which will be made available in less than a couple of weeks on Cwcville Shopping, the previously borrowed [[Robotnik]] character will be replaced with a newly created Robotics Scientist (who followed in Robotnik's footsteps, but is not related). His name has been thought up as well; I am announcing a little [[contest]] for those who are interested. The prize is a Free copy of [[Sonichu 1|Sonichu Comic Book #1]] (ONLY One Winner will be slected, and One Prize will be distributed).

In the Comments Below THIS Post with the hints I am providing; the First Person who Guesses the new character's name, or is the closest, will receive Sonichu Book #1, free of charge.

The hints are follows:

-His Full Name is two words, and totals to three syllables.

-His first name is the same as one of the Nicktoon Characters.

-His Initials are R.S.

-His last name flies with the jets, and [[Rainbow Dash]].

-His last name sounds similar to the name of an evolved Pok'emon.

I will announce the Name, and upload his image onto here shortly before I create the book project on Lulu.com, right before the book becomes available, before [[Halloween]].

Good Luck, and have a great and safe day.}}

Not long after making this post, Chris realized that his authoritarian rules about who can comment on his Facebook page restricted the contest's eligibility to his few official friends. He solved this problem by adding that people could also "Message me on Etsy.com."

Billy asked:

{{quoteboxgreen|So, is this just a name change, or are you actually erasing robotnik and redrawing a new character design into the comic?}}

Chris replied:

{{quotebox|Removing Robotnik; New Complete Character.}}

Billy:

{{quoteboxgreen|As for the name... I'm guessing... Ren Starmy?}}

Chris:

{{quotebox|Not Starmie.}}

Billy made several more guesses, including:

{{quoteboxgreen|Ren Skyzor.}}

Chris confirmed:

{{quotebox|You got it in pronunciation; his name is Ren Skysoar.}}

===Introducing Dr. Ren Skysoar===
[[File:Ren metal.jpg|300px|left|thumb]]
Chris shared a photo posted to his Etsy account along with:

{{quotebox|20 October 2015
Billy got the name; it is his choice of Who now gets the free copy of Sonichu Book #1. Time to suck up to him. LOL

Ladies and Gentlemen, Dr. Ren Skysoar.}}

He added:

{{quotebox|And Skysoar's head DOES look like a Strawberry; a funny accident in drawing that adds appeal to him. Besides which, a Strawberry diet sounds a Lot healthier than an all Egg diet.}}
{{quotebox|Welcome to the Cwcville area, Ren "Strawberry" Skysoar. LOL}}

On the same day, Chris uploaded 15 "new" [[Sonichu_1#2015_Revisions|retconned pages of Sonichu #1]] to make the transition from Robotnik to Ren Skysoar.
{{clear}}

===Oh Boy, More Pages!===
{{quotebox|23 October 2015
[[File:ChristineB&W.jpg|250px|right|thumb]]
I am coloring in the new pages I have drawn for [[Sonichu 11|Book 11]]; look forward to seeing them in the album on here Saturday or Sunday.

Have a great and safe day.}}

===Sonichu: The Force Awakens===
On 26 October, Chris uploaded 16 new pages of the ongoing tale of [[Sonichu 11|Sonichu #11]].

===[[Sonichu 1|Sonichu #1]] Now in Print===
Chris linked to a new offering on his Etsy store and wrote:

{{quotebox|26 October 2015
Sonichu Book #1 is up on Cwcville Shopping; ready to be printed and autographed (or shipped directly without an autograph). Buy and continue the collection; enjoy.

Thank you, and have a great day.}}

===You're Quite Welcome===
Chris linked to a rare [[YouTube]] [[Thank You from Christine Chandler|video]] along with:

{{quotebox|26 October 2015
Thank You All for your continuing support. :)}}

===More Wave 2 Prototypes===
{{quotebox|26 October 2015
Two new prototype figures completed! [[Simonla Rosechu]] and [[Silvana Rosechu]]. Two left for me to make to officially complete my own Wave 2 Set. Enjoy viewing these for now. I may add the newer figures onto my shop mid-November.

Thank you all for your continued support. :)

[[File:Simonla&SilvanaAmiiboA.jpg|thumb|200px|left]]
[[File:Simonla&SilvanaAmiiboB.jpg|thumb|200px|right]]
[[File:Simonla&SilvanaAmiiboC.jpg|thumb|200px|center]]
}}

An ignorant fan asked:

{{quoteboxred|I like the tail with the stinger, on that one, can it inject poison into its victims?}}

Chris corrected:

{{quotebox|No; it's a Drill, like the ones on her arms that open and close.}}

Billy asked:

{{quoteboxgreen|How come silvana has a pikachu tail like a male sonichu?}}

Chris replied:

{{quotebox|Billy, Read [[Sonichu 8|Sonichu #8]].}}

===Church and State in Cwcville===
In two private messages, Waterman asked Chris about the ongoing plot of Sonichu #11:

{{quoteboxgreen|25 October 2015
Wait... [[Cera]] was the oldest? Shouldn't she have evolved first? This is so weird.}}

{{quoteboxgreen|27 October 2015
There's something I've been wondering I think you need to address... why was [[Kevin the Jew|Kevin]] in that school play? Isn't he Jewish? Why is there a Christian-themed SCHOOL play at all? What happened to the separation of church and state? Are you an antidisestablishmentarianist, Christine Weston Chandler? These are questions we're dying to get answers to.}}

Chris responded:

{{quotebox|Firstly, there was [[Chris and religion|never any separation between church and state]]. Can't Townsville have its Mayor and still be part of Its church and state? Or perhaps, my idea of "Mayorship" or whatever you wish to refer to it as, was minimal, lack of better, or something. Kevin had volunteered to be part of the play, to explore the other aspects outside of his family's. It's a general [[Christmas]] Play; I have only some info on how a play, improved based on past interpretations with human-capable memory of said plays.

And every individual creature or person has their own natural rate of growth; it is not uncommon to have a sibling born on the same day with the others, even to be the Second of the three, to have a Growth Spurt before the other two.}}
{{quotebox|I am also aware of the definition of "antidisestablishmentarianism": to be opposed to the withdrawal, or reluctance, of accepting state or church support and establishment.

I feel it is important for a city to accept the support of the state it is located in. And there are churches in [[Cwcville]].

What the hell have you been thinking? I encourage everyone to be their own person in their respective individual rights and ways of thinking.

Definitely unlike the meme fan art against me, I am Not anti socialist, nor anything like freaking [[JERKS|Hitler]] at all. I do not atone for what he tried to enforce at all.

And I will thank you not to mislabel me as such as well.

Thank you.}}

===More Issue #1 Retcons===
[[File:Son1p36.jpg|thumb|right|300px|Oh noes!]]
On 28 October, Chris added two brand new pages to his [[Sonichu 1|Sonichu #1]] album, giving a new twist to the appearances of [[Sonic]] and [[Amy Rose]].
{{clear}}
===Ironic Autism===
Chris shared a YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yeh7D0zz8G0 video] and a link to his Etsy page and commented:

{{quotebox|30 October 2015
Isn't it ironic that I would come up with an Actual Autism Character to a game that could be considered in the mind of an Autistic child, in theory? I think it's neat.}}

===Sonichu Finally Goes Trans===
{{quotebox|31 October 2015
Happy Halloween from Cwcville!

The leading family are theming with [[My Little Pony|Equestria Girls]]. Sonichu, Rosechu and Robbie are wearing wigs. Christine had her hair colored special for her Twilight Sparkle outfit. I think Robbie looks awesome with the [[rainbow]] hair. Cera looks sassy as Applejack. And Sonichu and Rosechu look great as Canonical Friends in the MLP universe: Vinyl Scratch and Octavia Melody.

Stay Safe while Trick-or-Treating, escorting the children on the outing, or while partying.

BOO!

[[File:Ha1.jpg|thumb|left|400px]]
[[File:Ha2.jpg|thumb|right|400px]]}}

==Posts by Chris on others' pages==

===[[Amiibo]] For Sale===
Chris posted the following on the "Amiibo Trade & Collectors" page.
{{quotebox|2 October 2015
[[File:Amiibo Trade.png|thumb|300px|right]]
I now have for trade, NIB, Greninja, Lucario, Captain Falcon, Fox, Dr. Mario and Charizard Amiibo figures; ALL US Versions. I want to trade for the Skylanders/Amiibo: Turbo Charge Donkey Kong With Barrel Blaster, and Dark Hammer Slam Bowser With Dark Crown Cruiser.

Considering their Rarity, I will trade Fox, Lucario, Greninja or Captain Falcon for one pair set of DK with Barrel Blaster, or Dark Bowser with Clown Cruiser. I will trade Charizard and Dr. Mario, as a pair set, for either DK or Dark Bowser figure and vehicle pair.

Please, PM me for serious trade acceptance/offer.

Also, if you like my custom character figures, visit my shop on [[Etsy]]: etsy.com/shop/CwcvilleShopping to make a purchase. No Trades for Custom Figures. Enter Promo Code: bogo30off, to buy one of my figures and get a second one for 30% off. (must buy first figure at $50 in order to receive offer).
}}

===Bann Has Happened===
Chris apparently got his ass banned from "Amiibo Trade & Collectors" for some hostile posts. Someone commented on his Amiibo:

{{quoteboxred|I know you tried but that's not worth 50 at all. And official? You're just merging 2 already licensed characters.}}

Chris countered:

{{quotebox|4 October 2015
I got news for you: LOOK AROUND! LOTS of other people are doing their own characters from pre made characters as well. There are easily a Captain Toad with light up helmet, Pikachus in varying costumes, AND even Mega Charizards X and Y, Mega Lucario, and I will bet Mega Mewtwos will be popping up as well after THAT figure is released.

Step Off, Hater; You've Got Served, Chyeah!}}

Someone else commented:

{{quoteboxgreen|this is going to go over many people's heads.

OMFG, wait. is this actually cwc himself? nah, it can't be...[incomplete]}}

Chris replied:

{{quotebox|
CWC, HERSELF, Yes, I Have Transitioned and Identified myself as Female. Feminine Pronouns, Please.}}

===No Resemblance===
[[File:Waterman.jpg|thumb|150px|left]]
On 4 October, [[William Elliott Waterman|Waterman]] posted a new photo of himself. Chris commented:

{{quotebox|4 October 2015
Good photo. I think I had stated you looked like me in the face; this photo makes me take that back. You look totally different from me.}}

Waterman responded:

{{quoteboxred|Thanks Christine.}}

Chris was referring to a post from [[October 2013 Facebook Posts#Posts by Chris's Friends|October 2013]].
{{clear}}

{{Facebook}}
[[Category:Facebook]]

June 2012 Facebook posts

2025-05-09T08:39:09Z

Alan Pardew: Switched from my user page's article to the actual one.

The following covers Chris's [[Facebook]] activity in [[June 2012]].

==Summary==
* 2 June - Chris spends the day in fear of the [[2012 Poster campaign|Poster campaign]].<ref><s>[http://cwcki.forumer.com/c-ville-poster-flyer-campaign-update-t2224624.html]</s> (dead link as of Jul 2014)</ref>
* 4 June - Chris snaps at the [[trolls]].
* 8 June - Chris is jealous of all [[JERKS|men]].
* 9 June - Chris suspects a troll at [[McDonalds]].
* 9 June - Chris invites his friends to his [[Alex's Lemonade Stand|lemonade stand charity]].
* 12 June - Chris doesn't understand people.
* 14 June - Chris swears at a McDonald's employee and blames her for giving him a hard time.
* 15 June - Chris muses about a TV show.
* 18 June - Chris is lonely at McDonalds.
* 23 June - Chris blames the trolls for his emotional problems.
* 25 June - Chris is shocked by [[My Little Pony]] parodies.
* 26 June - Chris is nostalgic and blames the trolls for destroying his artistic inspiration.
* 27 June - Chris erupts in anger at the trolls.
* 27 June - Chris gets banned from another McDonalds.
* 28 June - Chris experiences extreme mood swings.
* 29 June - Chris is depressed and angry about his life, going on about Michael Snyder, calling him “CHILDREN FUCKING-DAMNED”.
* 30 June - The power is out at Chris's home.
* Unknown - Chris hopes someone will bomb [[The Game Place]] and kill [[Michael Snyder]].

==Posts from Chris==
===T Day===
{{quotebox|2 June 2012
It is here: "T" Day. 6:15 AM; according to the Forum, the bastards got an early start about two hours ago.}}
{{quotebox|All I am capable of doing is remain inside the house with my mom and the pups, keep an eye on the local news and outside the window,...}}
{{quotebox|...and wait. }}
{{quotebox|Everyone else that gets this message, please relay to your friends. Locate any to all of the Trolls handing out and posting...}}
{{quotebox|any Anti-Christian Chandler posters and flyers, arrest the bastards, and destroy ALL posters/flyers of the topic you all find.}}
{{quotebox|Please Help in countering their heinous name-smearing campaign. Thank You, and God's Speed and Blessings.}}
{{quotebox|Just reviewing the older posts of the plot; a group of them will meet at [[Fashion Square]] at 11:00 AM in or around the Food Court Area.}}
{{quotebox|Watch around Rio Road, and Rio Hill Shopping Area.}}
{{quotebox|Some of them may wear ugly clown masks, similar to "Twisted Metal"'s Sweet Tooth Character.}}
{{quotebox|Some of them may dress up as Ghosts, Triple "K" Style and idea.}}
{{quotebox|Dressed in [[Man in the Pickle Suit|Pickle Costume/Suit Outfits]].}}
{{quotebox|They may or may not be armed with weapons.}}
{{quotebox|Do not let them make any comments on he 1st Amendment, or "Barracks got our back."}}
[[File:ChrisSkywriter.jpg|thumb|right|"They may have hired a Skywriter."]]
{{quotebox|Crap! They may have hired a Skywriter.}}
{{quotebox|Destoy any video recorders/recordings they may shoot or make; prevent any of their footage from going online.}}
{{quotebox|The trolls have gotten everyone informed wrongly about me by about 2:00 PM; one of them started making their way to my house at about 4:30PM}}
{{quotebox|PLEASE. Somebody tell me he/she did something against the trolls and their poster plot today!!! I am Not seeing anything good.}}
{{quotebox|Swell! Nobody cares enough to give me a visual confirmation on the poster plot, and the known/unknown haunts me over and over.}}
{{quotebox|I could be DEAD and no one on my Facebook would give a damn. Thanks a lot! <nowiki>|:(</nowiki>}}

Finally [[Kim]] replied:

{{quoteboxgreen|I just got home from work, sorry I couldn't comment earlier! Of course I care, you shouldn't think like that. Sometimes people just draw a blank and aren't sure what to say.}}

[[Anna]] piped up:

{{quoteboxred|Here is my reason for not saying anything: I know that it's all fake, and that you've fallen for it once again. Nobody's out there posting signs or protesting or anything. But if I say that, you won't believe me. And you have 11 friends on Facebook, many of whom do not even live in the [[Charlottesville]] area & so could not check on things for you, & the rest may not have even been on Facebook yet today. & those that have, might not be subscribed to you. So they may not have even seen your posts.}}

Chris:

{{quotebox|I am probably an idiot for asking at a time like this; HOW do you know; did you have some Intel of your own; did you know a detail I did not? Please Explain, Anna.}}

Anna:

{{quoteboxred|You're not an idiot. I know because people are still messaging me on Facebook telling me so - people who are still your fans, & because it's extremely obvious to me that the pictures of the posters hung up in places are fake. I've gotten very good at spotting the difference between real and fake over the years. And by using logic, it's easy to see that nobody's going to spend money on a plane ticket/gas/hotel room/taking off work just to come torment you for a day.}}

===To The Trolls===
{{quotebox|4 June 2012

I have continued reading your posts and alerting [[Jerkops|the authorities]] of your actions. NOBODY came to my house at all, you lying, cheating bastards. Frankly, I grow tired of continuing to read your shit lies, including the biggest hoax of yours, the Poster Campaign. [[Naive|Nobody put up any damn posters or handed out frigging flyers at all]]. I have been [[Ego#Surrendering_Information|reading your posts personally through "trombonista's" account]]; there was NO MOLE.

Sincerely,
Christian Weston Chandler
June 4, 2012}}

===Stressed, tired, old and confused===
{{quotebox|4 June 2012
I feel stressed. I feel tired. I FEEL OLD.}}

Kim suggested:

{{quoteboxgreen|You and your mom should try and take a vacation somewhere nice and quiet. Maybe go up to the Shennadoah Valley on a cool day and enjoy nature. You can take the puppies there too!}}

Chris could not be consoled:

{{quotebox|Nobody really, truly understand me.}}
{{quotebox|I do not understand everything either.}}

===Chris the super villain===
{{quotebox|8 June 2012
I feel lonely again. I saw a young male/female couple; he nibbled at her ear; I felt like I wanted to make him disappear ([[Death Threats|not kill]]). }}
{{quotebox|I feel like I am inches away from becoming a super villian, who not wants to conquer the world, but wants to be rid of all males 21-50...}}
{{quotebox|.. years old by transporting all of those jerks into another dimension, or accelerating their individual ages to 51 each.}}
{{quotebox|But I know a lot better than that, and I just bottle that [[Chris and anger|anger]] up into my fist and punch the air, free of any living being.}}

===Suspicious possible troll===
{{quotebox|9 June 2012
I am at McD in Ruckers; there is a B.K. Y.Adult sitting behind me; he acknowledged me; he is quite possibly a troll.}}

Kim asked:

{{quoteboxgreen|How did he acknowledge you?}}

Chris responded:

{{quotebox|A familiar greeting grunt and a nod.}}
{{quotebox|Very Suspicious.}}
{{quotebox|He has his head down A.T.M; going to wait until he leaves.}}
{{quotebox|Typing or playing on his phone; he may be posting on Forum or communicating with his kind. Continuing to keep distance.}}
{{quotebox|The dude finally left at 12:15, so I left too.}}

===Alex's Lemonade Stand===
[[File:ChrisLemonadeStand.jpg|thumb|right]]
{{quotebox|9 June 2012
Just a note, I will be hosting my lemonade stand for [[Alex's Lemonade Stand]] Foundation tomorrow.}}
{{quotebox|It will be held at my [[church]] at 1901 Thomson Road in Charlottesville, VA, at 12:00 Noon, after service and during a picnic there.}}
{{quotebox|All on my friends list are welcome for good food, lemonade and meeting new people. Plus donations for A.L.S.F. are appreciated too.}}

===Chris has raised $50===
{{quotebox|10 June 2012
Including my ten dollar donation, I have raised $50.00 for the foundation.}}

===Slump===
{{quotebox|12 June 2012
I feel in another slump, because I realize another reason behind my shyness and all. I Do Not Understand... Especially people, and more especially, the people who hate me. And the lack of understanding bothers me, because it is like any unknown to any person; all unknowns frighten all people.

IDK, maybe if I can understand people, and how to deal better with the hateful people, I'd probably feel less inhibited. And at the moment, even so, I still am stuck at home most of the time with my responsibilities between [[Barb|my mother]], our [[Clover and Snoopy|dogs]] and [[Chandler Cats|cats]], the finances, household, etc. {:(

<nowiki>*sigh*...</nowiki> }}

===Grouch===
{{quotebox|14 June 2012
[[File:McD 2.jpg|thumb|left]]
Do NOT go to the McDonalds at Forest Lakes in Charlottesville, VA, or this old grouch will give you a hard time for cussing all over the place, even though you say only One damn word.}}

===Movie review===
{{quotebox|14 June 2012
I've just watched the movie, [[Wikipedia:Chronicle (film)|Chronicle]], Director's Cut. It was a 4/5 movie.}}
{{quotebox|I saw myself in the lead boy, I forget his name A.T.Moment, in what I would do to the Trolls, [[Snyder]], the [[The GAMe PLACe|PLace]] building portion.}}
{{quotebox|But I feel that I would have done it tactful, Like Matt. When Steve was lost, I felt as emotionally broken as "A" did; equal to losing [[Bob|Mr.C]] }}
{{quotebox|My dad, Mr.C. I and Mom still deeply miss him very much.}}

===Danny Tambirelli===
{{quotebox|15 June 2012
[[File:TV show.jpg|thumb]]
I think I look more like [[Wikipedia:Danny Tamberelli|Danny Tambirelli]] when he grew his hair out in episode 321 of [[Wikipedia:Figure It Out|Figure It Out]], except I'm Blonde.

LOL; he wore his hair well then.}}
{{quotebox|Also, does anyone remember which episode has Lori Beth playing that her toy zebra is dead.}}

===Meh===
{{quotebox|18 June 2012
At McD in [[Ruckersville]]; sitting in a quiet, peaceful, dark corner; enjoying a choc chip frappe, it's good...}}
{{quotebox|Feeling lonely, meh, blank, wishy-washy... meh.}}

===Major emotional trainwreck===
{{quotebox|23 June 2012
YES!!! I AM a Major Emotional Trainwreck, so What The Hell of it is Interesting to YOU Damn Trolls, aside from the FACT that ALL of you have made me this way from YOUR Damn Manipulations???!!!}}

===Bode & lonely===
{{quotebox|25 June 2012
Just a random thought: I prefer to say "bode" over "bored"; sounds similar, and I like [[Chris and English#CWC-isms|word play]]. So, yeah, I'm bode & lonely right now.}}

===Dark parodic shit===
{{quotebox|25 June 2012
Ugh!!! In reference to the dark animations found recently on YouTube of [[My Little Pony]]...}}
{{quotebox|Vids like "shed.mov" and "cupcakes in HD"...}}
{{quotebox|It Really Disturbs me... Why do people want to kill Rainbow Dash? Seriously, What...the...Fuck?!}}
{{quotebox|Do these people hate [[Tomgirl Saga|Tomboys/Tomgirls]], or is it that she is a brave hero character, or just What the Fuck?}}
{{quotebox|This Dark Parodic Shit is among which what killed my inspiration to draw and write more of [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu and Rosechu]].}}
{{quotebox|That shit makes my soul vomit. What the Fuck?}}

===Oh, my life===
{{quotebox|26 June 2012
Just watched [[Wikipedia: Katy Perry|Katy Perry]]'s "The One That Got Away" music video; it touched me; made me think of the life that got away from me in 2000...}}
{{quotebox|I really wish I could go back to 1999 and make myself and my family stay in Midlothian. }}
{{quotebox|Oh, my life. :_( }}

===Trolls destroyed my inspiration===
{{quotebox|June 26, 2012
Going back to the Dark Parodies for a moment, I've just realized that for me at least, it is not only, and as much, the violence, mislabels, being mocked, made dumb of, etc. in the dang parodies, but the Timing of their creation and distribution.

I feel I had hardly that much time to fully elaborate the characters and their individual personalities, roles, it all, the ideas and stories, in my mind to paper, we're still just sprouting, not even close to full bloom. And when the Dark Parodies arise before everything that is fact to my creations and stories were all made full and clear, it causes total counter-creative chaos to me, the original creator/artist/storyteller, and too much of the chaos is Too Much on my mind and focus and creative inspiration are all lost in a massive writer's block.

I hate all of the people against me, those who find me "interesting" in twisted ways, those who harass me for "new content", those who just do not understand or get me at all (and that is Everyone), on the Internet around the world, because they all seriously are to blame for mentally and emotionally raping me to a state of total depression and lost inspirations. I made all of my mistakes falling for their cruel Manipulations; That is my fault. But for making me the lost soul that I am today from harassment and rape, EVERYTHING is ALL THEIR FAULT, BLAME and SINS!

Those damn people need to seriously think about the massive damage they mutually in combination all have made.}}

Anna:

{{quoteboxred|I'm still amazed at how so many people think they can justify baiting and trolling an autistic man by calling him naive or saying he deserves it for _____. There is nothing you could do, Christian, that would make you deserve ANY of this treatment.}}

Chris:

{{quotebox|Thank you.}}

===Hey! Damn trolls!===
Clearly cracking under the pressure of being duped by the trolls and [[28 October 2011|his impending arraignment in July]], the once smug Chris degenerates into self-pity even further. Ironically, [[Chris and hypocrisy|Chris has been guilty of almost every single thing he wants the trolls to stop doing to him.]]

{{quotebox|27 June 2012
Hey! Damn Trolls, Cyber-Bullies, and People ALL Around the Fucking World!!!

Quit [[Homos|HATING]] Me!!!

Quit [[Niggos|DISCRIMINATING]] Me!!!

Quit [[Megan|HARASSING]] Me!!!

Quit [[Bob|GIVING ME GRIEF]]!!!

Quit [[Death Threats|WANTING ME DEAD]]!!!

Quit [[Michael Snyder|BAD-MOUTHING]] Me!!!

Quit [[Twitter|BLOGGING]] ABOUT Me!!!

Quit [[Private_Villa_of_Corrupted_Citizens_(message_board)|HAVING FORUMS]] ABOUT Me!!!

Quit [[CWCki|HAVING WEBSITES AND WEBPAGES]] ABOUT Me!!!

Quit [[6 June 2010|PHOTOGRAPHING]] and [[Clyde_is_Weaker_than_Water|PHOTOSHOPPING]] Me!!!

Quit [[ShecameforCWC|DRAWING]] Me!!!

Quit [[Lars%27_Ship_Has_Sunk|MOCKING]] Me!!!

Quit MAKING ME LOOK [[Naïve|STUPID]], [[Chris_and_his_Ego#Surrendering_Information|DUMB]], [[Slow-in-the-mind|RETARDED]], [[Twin Falling Towers|EVIL]], [[Sonichu Special 4|VILLIANOUS]], [[Strangle that Clyde Cash|BLOOD-THIRSTY]], [[Don%27t_Mess_With_Me|MURDEROUS]], [[White_knight#Chris_is_not_a_good_net_citizen|UNSOCIABLE]], [[Father Call|UNCARING]], [[Chris and Remorse|UNEMPATHETIC]], [[Chris and Remorse|UNCOMPASSIONATE]], [[CWC_Calls_Out_Three_Na%C3%AFve_YouTubers|HATABLE]], [[Chris and Race|DETESTABLE]], [[Chris and Anger|IRRITABLE]], [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|CRAPPED-ON]], [[CWCki|ETCETERA, ETCETERA, FUCKING ETCETERA]]!!!

Quit [[Chris_and_his_Ego#Fishing_for_sympathy|MAKING ME MISERABLE, DEPRESSED, LONELY, SAD, and HATEFUL OF MY OWN LIFE]]!!!

Just QUIT IT, and LEAVE ME AND MY LIFE ALONE AND [[Chris and English|TO BE]]!!!!!!!}}

Anna suggested:

{{quoteboxred|Solution: do not use the internet anymore, and change your phone number. It's either that, or this continues forever. That's just the nature of the trolls.}}

Chris replied:

{{quotebox|I can NOT change my number; TOO Much are linked to it, and I do not remember EVERY Last important person/company linked. Plus it is on my [[business card]]s.}}

Anna:

{{quoteboxred|But you don't have a business, and how many calls do you get that aren't from trolls?}}

Chris:

{{quotebox|Firstly, I don't need to have a business to have business cards with my contact info and [[3DS]] Mii QR code and Mii image on them. Second, I get all of the important calls for this household these days; I can not afford a new number.<ref>[[:File:June27.png]]</ref>}}

===Discriminated at McDonald's===
{{quotebox|27 June 2012
I have just been discriminated a AGAIN at the McDonalds at Forest Lakes; Do NOT go there either, or of you do, throw newspaper in the damn old bitchy, [[Niggo|black]] woman's face!!!
[[File:Difficult time lady.jpg|thumb|left]]}}
{{quotebox|This woman gave me a difficult time too.
[[File:McD.jpg|thumb|right]]}}
{{quotebox|I am soo tired of people hating me.

I can't stand it. And I don't understand...}}

===Chris fishes for pity===
{{quotebox|28 June 2012
I feel I am losing my will to live, if I have not done so already from having a dead soul.}}
{{quotebox|After taking a shower this morning, I went to my old room, got my [[Megatron pistol|Megatron G1 figure]], removed its attachments, and in its Gun mode,...}}
{{quotebox|I shot myself in the head. I am THAT depressed and internally dead, if Anyone on my friends list,...}}
{{quotebox|Aside from Kim and [[Anna|Fighta]],...}}
{{quotebox|Ever gives a fuck, damn or time of day for me anymore.}}

===Good News===
{{quotebox|28 June 2012
Well, for once, there is a little good news tonight. After watching the latest vid in that dark parody set, Party.mov, I found out the detail I have been overlooking, "Ask Jappleack". I found the vids of the comic panels posted on ask-jappleack.tumbler.com, uploaded by "epicduck123". It dawns upon me in the part where Original Twilight Sparkle informs Jappleack about the parallel dimensions set apart from Original Equestria (Prime). The parodies that have been made from my [[Sonichu]], [[Rosechu]] and [[CWCville|Cwcville]], are all considered alternate dimensions from the Cwcville Prime that still remains MINE and MINE ALONE!

Summary: to put everything into an easy to draw out perspective in my comic pages is simply to realize the alternate Cwcvilles and their characters, combine my creativity with the Psychic Powers of [[Magi-Chan]] to expel all past outside influences, Including Troll Influences and Manipulations.

That plan will be set in motion and drawn, after I get the damn court shit resolved, try to find peace of mind free of the Internet influences, regain a huge amount of self-confidence, and relocate my inspiration, along with a new creative location, set up new routines for myself, Get My Life Back In Good Order, find my girlfriend/sweetheart...

And I will require someone to advise me in getting published Officially and Offline, attend to the public relation management, and all of the shit I should have gone into a LONG time ago. You Know, a Manager?, Publicist?,}}
{{quotebox|Lawer?,... that sort of Professional or Expert type Legitimate person.

Shit, it is a LOT of stuff, and I am NOT all-knowing.}}
{{quotebox|In any case, I am still seriously feeling bummed out, depressed, dead soul, constantly hurting and all of that. *sigh*... ugh! OY!}}

===Domo Short===
{{quotebox|29 June 2012
This is my favorite Domo Short, because of the song. http://t.co/uA30JAq }}

===Damn Michael Snyder===
{{quotebox|29 June 2012
Damn [[Michael Snyder]], and all of those who have made me further ill from unnecessary stress. I found it difficult to get up as early today, because of how hot it is today. At least we have air conditioning here. And the dogs are being good; it's peaceful right now.

But what really is depressing to me is a lot of things. On a normal day at best currently, I go out for something to eat; get a long walk in; get time to myself to think and reflect (feel lonely and sad). But mostly, I am just an (appreciated) errand boy for my mother and and our pets. I still find it very difficult to meet new people from my too great shyness and autism. I go online to kill time often, but I can not meet new people, because of the damn trolls and cyber-bullies and all that socially discouraging shit. I am not making any to many new real (female) friends. No Progress is made for me; not much is really getting done for me. I am a mouse lost with very little idea of a solid plan in this grand labyrinth of life.

And even worse, I have been encountering people who started hating me, in reference to the recent bans from those two McDonalds. That NOW makes FIVE places I have been and am banned from around here; counting Fashion Square (DAMN That Manajerk), [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] (DAMN [[Mary Lee Walsh]]), AND the PLace... CHILDREN-FUCKING-DAMNED Michael Snyder!!!

I Seriously Have Been PUBLICALY INVISIBLE for YEARS! The DAMN Trolling-Stupids have manipulated me; smeared my once good name through the [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|worst mud, muck, and bodily fluids]]; mentally and emotionally raped me continuously; made the worst imaginable reputation of me on the Internet, AND relayed THAT into OFFLINE LIFE in gossip, rumors, and presidentially grand Fucked-Up Campaigns!!!

My mind is comparably as worse off as a terribly bad drug addict; constantly blank, irritable, untalkative, ignorant to most social cues, Lost In Life, yada, yada, yada. Except I do not do any of those drugs or smoke.

...and I just do not understand most people and a lot of shit in life.}}

===HELP!===
{{quotebox|30 June 2012
HELP! HELP! HELP!!!}}
{{quotebox|Mom and I, and Green Lea Subdivision are without power; connected at McD.

There is a TREE Down ON the POWER LINES in the South Bound Lane on Spring Hill Road since 10:00 PM hour last night. Called Rappohannock Hours ago; Frigging Tree is still killing us at home. My family is desperate for the Air Conditioning, especially my mother.

Someone PLEASE Send Someone to remove Tree NOW.

[[File:FacebookTreeDown.jpeg|thumb|left]]}}

===Hellfire entrance and doors===
[[File:Image.jpg|thumb|right]]
It was probably in this month that Chris made the following statement, which he quickly removed:

{{quotebox|
I Pray that someone else Will plant a bomb in the Game and Hobby PLACe and Blow The Whole Damn Store Up! It does not Deserve to EVER have "C-Ville" in its name above its accursed, sullied, Hellfire Entrance and Doors! [[Death threats|Death to Michael Snyder too.]]}}
{{quotebox|
That Bastard, among Bastards, Ruined and Destroyed my Life, Emotions, and Being!}}

==References==
<references/>

{{facebook}}
[[Category:Facebook]]

CWCki:Templates

2025-05-09T08:25:02Z

Alan Pardew: /* Unholy Tetrad */ Changed to Quintet

This page is designed to help people quickly and effortlessly find the needed template by visually comparing them, instead of clicking on [[Dragon Ball Z|over 9000]] links on the [[:Category:Templates]] page. It can also help people who want to create a new template or edit existing ones.

==Information boxes==
===Article change alert===
====[[Template:Delete|Delete]]====
{{Delete|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:workingonit|Major Edit]]====
{{workingonit}}
====[[Template:Merge|Merge]]====
{{Merge|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Rename|Rename]]====
{{Rename|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Sandbox|Sandbox]]====
{{Sandbox|nocat=true}}

====[[Template:Split Off|Split Off]]====
{{Split Off|nocat=true}}

----

===Article needs something===
====[[Template:Apocrypha|Apocrypha]]====
{{Apocrypha}}
====[[Template:Deletedvideo|Deletedvideo]]====
{{Deletedvideo|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:VideoWithContentID|Video with Content ID]]====
{{VideoWithContentID}}
====[[Template:DeadLinks|DeadLinks]]====
{{DeadLinks|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Illustrations|Illustrations]]====
{{Illustrations|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Improve|Improve]]====
{{Improve|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:ImproveMusic|ImproveMusic]]====
{{ImproveMusic|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Incomplete|Incomplete]]====
{{Incomplete|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Needs Images|Needs Images]]====
{{Needs Images|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Needs Updating|Needs Updating]]====
{{Needs Updating|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Orphaned|Orphaned]]====
{{Orphaned|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Oversized|Oversized]]====
{{Oversized|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Quality|Quality]]====
{{Quality|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Stub|Stub]]====
{{Stub|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Transcription|Transcription]]====
{{Transcription|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Dated|Dated]]====
{{Dated}}
----

===Infobox===
====[[Template:Infobox Person|Infobox Person]]====
{{Infobox Person
| name = Clyde Cash
| image = TheRealClydeCash.jpg|100
| alt =
| caption = Clyde
| birthday = 04 July 1976
| age = 34
| location = [[Molvania]]
| relation = Troll
| saga =
| knownfor =
| nationality =
| education =
| organization =
| influenced =
| notes =
|nocat=true}}
<pre style="overflow: auto">
{{Infobox Person
| name = Clyde Cash
| image = TheRealClydeCash.jpg|100
| alt =
| caption = Clyde
| birthday = 04 July 1976
| age = 34
| location = [[Molvania]]
| relation = Troll
| saga =
| knownfor =
| nationality =
| education =
| organization =
| influenced =
| notes =
}}</pre>

===In-text disclaimers===
====[[Template:AbsentChris|AbsentChris]]====
{{AbsentChris|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:BellaSource|BellaSource]]====
{{BellaSource|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Deleted User|Deleted User]]====
{{Deleted User|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Draft|Draft]]====
{{Draft|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Essay|Essay]]====
{{Essay|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Health|Health]]====
{{HealthDisclosure|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Honest|Honest]]====
{{Honest|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:IncestCover|IncestCover]]====
{{IncestCover|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Ongoing|Ongoing]]====
{{Ongoing|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Protip|Protip]]====
{{Protip|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Tardrage|Tardrage]]====
{{Tardrage|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Transgender|Transgender]]====
{{Transgender|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Troll|Troll]]====
{{Troll|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Unreliable|Unreliable]]====
{{Unreliable|nocat=ture}}
====[[Template:Wise|Wise]]====
{{Wise|nocat=true}}
----

===Delusion disclosures===
====[[Template:JesusPossession|Jesus Christ possession]]====
{{JesusPossession|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:MagiChanPossession|Magi-Chan possession]]====
{{MagiChanPossession|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:SonichuPossession|Sonichu possession]]====
{{SonichuPossession|nocat=true}}

===Various===
====[[Template:Box|Box]]====
{{Box|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:CWCipedia|CWCipedia]]====
{{CWCipedia|nocat=true}}

====[[Template:Fan art|Fan art]]====
{{Fan art|nocat=true}}

====[[Template:Navbox Quoteboxes|Quoteboxes]]====
{{Navbox Quoteboxes|nocat=true}}

==List containers==
===Chris-related===
====[[Template:CWC on TV|CWC on TV]]====
{{CWC on TV|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:CWC-isms|CWC-isms]]====
{{CWC-isms|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Captain's Log|Captain's Log]]====
{{Captain's Log|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Chris and|Chris and]]====
{{Chris and|nocat=true}}

====[[Template:Education|Education]]====
{{Education|nocat=true}}

====[[Template:Fantasies|Fantasies]]====
{{Fantasies|nocat=true}}

====[[Template:Flipnotes|Flipnotes]]====
{{Flipnotes|nocat=true}}

====[[Template:Health|Health]]====
{{Health|nocat=true}}

====[[Template:JailLetter|Jail Letters and Calls]]====
{{JailLetter|nocat=true}}

====[[Template:Mailbag|Mailbag]]====
{{Mailbag|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Mannerisms|Mannerisms]]====
{{Mannerisms|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Music Videos|Music Videos]]====
{{Music Videos|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:People|People]]====
{{People|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Places|Places]]====
{{Places|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Relics of Fail|Relics of Fail]]====
{{Relics of Fail|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Timeline|Timeline]]====
{{Timeline|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Writings|Writings]]====
{{Writings|nocat=true}}

----

===Sonichu-related===
====[[Template:CWCverse|CWCverse]]====
{{CWCverse|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Hedgehog Boys|Hedgehog Boys]]====
{{Hedgehog Boys|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Sonichu|Sonichu]]====
{{Sonichu|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Videobooks|Videobooks]]====
{{Videobooks|nocat=true}}
----
===Love-related===
====[[Template:Love quest|Love quest]]====
{{Love quest|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Sweetheart Videos|Sweetheart Videos]]====
{{Sweetheart Videos|nocat=true}}
----

===Troll-related===
====[[Template:Clyde Saga|Clyde Saga]]====
{{Clyde Saga|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:FanChats|FanChats]]====
{{FanChats|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Troll Videos]]====
{{Troll Videos|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Trolls|Trolls]]====
{{Trolls|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:The Cwcivil War of 2009|The Cwcivil War of 2009]]====
{{The Cwcivil War of 2009|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Unholy|Unholy Quintet]]====
{{Unholy|nocat=true}}
----

===Various===
====[[Template:Succession|Succession]]====
{{Succession|nocat=true}}

==Other==
===Notes===
====[[Template:Fix|Fix]]====
{{Fix|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Cite|Cite]]====
{{Cite|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Clarify|Clarify]]====
{{Clarify|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Failed verification|Failed verification]]====
{{Failed verification|nocat=true}}

----

===Quotes===
====[[Template:Mbox|Mbox]]====
{{Mbox|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Quote|Quote]]====
{{Quote|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Rainbow|Rainbow]]====
{{Rainbow|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Shirtbow|Shirtbow]]====
{{Shirtbow|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Squote|Squote]]====
{{Squote|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Tinyquote|Tinyquote]]====
{{Tinyquote|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:YoutubeAnnotation|YoutubeAnnotation]]====
{{YoutubeAnnotation|nocat=true}}
----
===Various===
====[[Template:Usage|Usage]]====
To be used on templates to document their purpose and how to use them. See [[Template:Usage|Usage]] for an example.
====[[Template:EmbedYoutube|EmbedYoutube]]====
{{EmbedYoutube|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:EventEntry|EventEntry]]====
{{EventEntry|nocat=true}}
====[[Template:Welcome|Welcome]]====
{{Welcome|YOUR_USERNAME|nocat=true}}

==See also:==
*[[CWCki:Requested Templates]]
*[[New Templates!]]

[[Category:Templates]]
[[Category:CWCki]]
[[Category:CWCki projects]]

CWCki:Improvement

2025-05-09T08:23:47Z

Alan Pardew: /* Rewrite/Expand */ I'm too old for these new CWC-isms. (Just changing Unholy Tetrad to Quintet)

Since December 2019, the CWCki has become [[Talk:Main Page/Archive 3#Removing "WHERE NO SHIT IS TOO MINOR!" tagline|more selective]] of what qualifies for inclusion, due to a substantial increase in [[Unholy Tetrad|people]] trying to disrupt or influence Chris for attention: the change means that Christorians now have a lot more time to improve or expand existing articles and pages. This pages lists what they think needs to be done:

* Can be done in any order.
* If you have a suggestion for improvement, add it to the appropriate section below: if you have completed any of the suggestions below, remove it from here.
* If you started working on an article in your sandbox, and want others to help, link your sandbox in the appropriate section below.

==Archival of Kiwi Farms links==
Archive Kiwi Farms forum reference links using Archive.today. Also copy the forum post contents to pages in [[:Category:CWCki Forums posts]] / [[:Category:Kiwi Farms posts]].

Evaluate Kiwi Farms links to see if they are needed (e.g. if the link goes to a Kiwi Farms post about a Facebook update, link the CWCki's page about the Facebook update instead; if the link goes to a Kiwi Farms post reposting a tweet, try to find the original tweet and link it instead).

Google Search shows the articles still with Kiwi Farms links as references. https://www.google.com/search?&q=site%3Asonichu.com+%22kiwifarms.net%22

==Urgent==

*Update relevant articles using info in [[:Template:RecentInfo]].

*Convert CWChronology pages such as [[February 2018]] to use References (many CWChronology pages are either missing sources or the source is difficult to find using standard links).

*Categorize and sort through all of the [[2020 Discord leaks|leaked images from the Discord]].

== Rewrite/Expand ==

For articles that need cleanup or expansion.

*[[Anna McLerran]] - numerous references in the article are dead links, should be revised

*[[Chris and work#Reasons for Chris's Refusal to Work]] - needs to be expanded

*[[Two's company snapshots]] - rewrite

*[[Mathematics]] - complete rework

*[[Netflix]] needs to be expanded to include newer shows he has watched, like BNA.

*The following pages need to be fixed up by deleting unwanted posts (such a Chris saying thanks or nice to some enabler) and retweets (of random giveaways and pointless enabler art) and rearranging important posts to the top.
** [[November 2018 social media posts]]
** [[December 2018 social media posts]]

*[[Chris and the Internet]]

*[[Chris and television]]

*[[Biology]] - Expand

*[[Cosplay]] needs details on Bronycon 2017+18

*Sections of [[Chris and religion]] have not been been updated since his CPU Uzume possession in early 2018. The article especially needs more information on Chris's own following, the "Devotees of Chris Chan Sonichu".

*[[Mysticism]] (or another page if inappropriate) - As seen in [[Twilight Sparkle's Secret Shipfic Folder|a category of Chris' TSSSF cards]], Chris uses a few magical tools such as a wand and the Glacce Bottle (along with the more known "[[Magic stones]]") to enhance his CPU abilities.

*[[Chris and stress]] - Rewrite to filter out Chris's stressors from things that Chris simply doesn't like and add information on Chris's coping mechanisms.

*In light of the [[:File:HeilbergStatement.png|sealing]] of the case, an number of articles, such as [[Weening]] and the [[Unholy Quintet]], need to be updated to reflect the Heilberg’s reasons. Basically, the Unholy Quintet played a major role in the Greene County Court's decision to hit the brakes on the flow of information.

*[[DoopieDoOver]] Expand section #BlockTheTrolls

== Update ==

; Articles

* [[Chris and health]] - Finish section on hydration. Find more information on Chris’s beliefs about water.
* [[Hyperdimension Neptunia#Watchmen]]
* [[Jacob Sockness]]

A full list of articles that need updating can be found [[:Category:Articles needing updates|here]].

; Assets

* A full review and refresh of the icons has been proposed to coincide with the rollout of the new {{tl|Saga}} template: this is because a number of them (such as that for Childhood and the CWCipedia) are provisional. [[CWCki:General#Icons modernisation|Full details here]].

== Standardize ==

* Standardize file names and categories for pages from ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'': see Little Owl’s [[User:Little Owl/Style guide|draft style guide]]: we are doing this, so that it will be easier to find them later, as well as to reduce confusion between subtle revisions (e.g. between [[:File:Sonichu - Sub-Episode 1, Page 5, Revision 1.jpg|this]] and [[:File:Sonichu - Sub-Episode 1, Page 5, Revision 2.jpg|that]]).

== Categorize ==

{{Protip|This project is currently on hold, instead please help finish the Standardization project.}}

* Categorize all files by going through [[Special:UncategorizedFiles]].

Pictures of/by
**Weens under Category:Ween
**White Knights under Category:White Knight
**Enablers under Category:Enabler
**A Logs under Category:A-Log
**Fan art under Category:Fan Art

If you see any useless pictures not being used anywhere put the delete template on them.

== Minor fixes ==

For minor aesthetic changes or droning repetitive fixes.

*Bluespike skype chats have minor formatting errors and summaries require piping

== Things that always need to be done ==
Changes to articles/templates that need to be done periodically.

*Keep [[Chris and coping]] updated.

*[[:Category:Media needing transcription|Transcribe media.]]

*Clean up unused files.

==Lost media==
A lot of Chris related media is lost. Help the CWCki by finding them and placing them in their articles.
Back them up in multiple publicly accessible websites before if you do find any.

*[[Chris Sex Logs|Skype sex logs by PandaHalo]]
*Sonichu fan promo 1 and 2 by timmys1984
*Sonichu home club videos by Chris
*CWC 4 Puns of the Patridiots, a video by trolls about MGS and CWC.
*Special thanks document from [[Power]]
*Clyde Cash's response video to [[No More Jokes]]

==Technical==

=== Urgent ===

* Most archive links to the [[CWCipedia]] are dead and lead to a fatal error page. This should get fixed ASAP.

=== Useful ===

* Introduce [https://www.mediawiki.org/wiki/Extension:TemplateSandbox TemplateSandbox] — this will allow editors to diagnose or improve templates without having to use trial and error.
* Introduce [https://www.mediawiki.org/wiki/Extension:ConfirmAccount ConfirmAccount] (see https://kiwifarms.net/threads/updating-the-cwcki.50150/post-7021292) — the current DM-based request system is not flexible, as the CWCki team do have to balance between real life and a backlog of maintenance and organization tasks. Someone needs to have interface rights to customise the ConfirmAccount interface to our requirements (e.g. Kiwi Farms/CWCki Club username instead of Real Name).
* Import Dot’s Syntax Highlighter (https://www.mediawiki.org/wiki/User:Remember_the_dot/Syntax_highlighter) — at least one jerkop uses it elsewhere to detect syntax errors.

=== Other ===

* Introduce [https://www.mediawiki.org/wiki/Extension:UserMerge UserMerge] — By merging all the blocked spambot accounts into one placeholder, we will have a TRUE and HONEST [[Special:Statistics|editor count]].

{{Newbie}}

[[Category:CWCki]]

Unholy Tetrad

2025-05-09T08:21:11Z

Alan Pardew: Hexad is changed to Quintet making some of the links not working including this one.

#REDIRECT [[Unholy Quintet]]

Template:Unholy

2025-05-09T08:20:40Z

Alan Pardew: Hexad is changed to Quintet making some of the links not working including this one.

{| id="toc" width="70%" style="text-align:left; clear:both;" align=center
|- style="background:#f66350" align="center" width="95%"
| '''[[Unholy Quintet|Unholy Quintet]]'''
|-
| style="font-size:20px; padding:5px 10px;" |
<center>
{{UnholyText}}</center>

|}

<noinclude>{{usage|1=This is a navigational template navbox for articles related to groups of people that interacted with Chris frowned upon by Christorians. The format for using this template is as follows: 

'''<nowiki>{{</nowiki>{{PAGENAME}}<nowiki>}}</nowiki>'''

- Displays:{{ {{PAGENAME}} }}
}}

[[Category:Navigational templates|{{PAGENAME}}]]</noinclude>

Weens

2025-05-09T07:55:28Z

Alan Pardew: /* Examples of weening */ Fix link

{{quote|Are you 6-years-old or somethin'?|[[Bob Chandler]] outsmarting [[BlueSpike|a ween]] attempting to [[prank call]] Chris.}}
{{quote|Don’t worry about those weens; you know you are safe around me and [[Polyamorous marriage|my Loves]]. 😊⚡️💙⚡️|Chris, attempting to persuade a fan weens won't hassle them at [[BronyCon]]<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20200226105210/https://twitter.com/cwcsonichu/status/1020049863961120768</ref>.}}

'''Weening''' or '''failtrolling''' is the act of attempting to troll someone, but ultimately failing at it the whole way through, and not receiving any significant results, typically due to inexperience with lolcow culture. The people that do this are often referred to as '''Weens''' (not to be confused with [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ween the alternative rock band]). A corruption of the phrase "epic win", weens are wannabe [[trolls]] who attempt to recreate the antics of prominent trolls, without being aware that there was much [[Chris and manipulation|manipulation]] behind the scenes to goad Chris into performing for the trolls, and therefore just embarrass themselves.<ref group = "note">In many cases, the modern, albiet much more controversial, incarnations of prominent trolls have figured this out.</ref>

Think we're exaggerating? Maybe some videos will help get the point across.

<center>{{#ev:youtube|O4mkAw9Be-k}}
{{#ev:archiveorg|youtube-4yUUi2Qco5Q}}</center>

==Examples of weening==
[[Image:epicweentrolling1.jpg|thumb|THIS IS WHAT WEENS ACTUALLY BELIEVE.]]
[[File:Paying to ween.png|thumb|A ween pays Chris money on livestream in order to post shit he doesn't even read.]]
[[File:ChangeorgGOPony2.jpg|thumb|A ween-made Change.org petition put in Chris's name.]]
[[Image:Furniggersmustdie.jpg|thumb|Typical ween art.]]

* Trolling plans (no matter how elaborate) that end up failing.
* Taking advantage of Chris by pretending to [[White knight|white-knight]] him. The [[CWCProtectSquad]] is a notorious example of this.
* Prank-calling Chris or his mother Barbara.<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20240202070152/https://twitter.com/Caseyj109/status/1739863842207805592></ref><ref>https://twitter.com/Caseyj109/status/1739863842207805592</ref>. Double dumbass points if it's just to yell "[[For Julie's Eyes Only|JULAAAY, JULAAAAAAY!]]", "[[Ian Brandon Anderson|IAN BRANDON ANDERSON]]/[[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!|SOMETHING]]!", or other ancient memes.
* Prank takeaway deliveries under Chris's name and address. Not only is this just ''annoying'' for anyone involved (on top of wasting both money and food), but numerous restaurants in Chris's area (namely Papa John's) have blacklisted his address precisely to prevent this.
* A-Logging. While not all weens are A-Logs and vice versa, the two often overlap. [[A-Logging|A-Log]] himself was as much of a ween as your average A-Log in numerous ways.
* Enabling Chris's fantastical beliefs. Chris's mind is already fucked up on its own merits, and people such as the [[Idea Guys]] have done more than enough mental damage to him. Once again, while not all weens are enablers and vice versa, they tend to overlap.
* Making fake [[Facebook]] and [[Twitter]] profiles of people Chris follows.
* Spamming Chris's Facebook pages with random pictures of his old triggers to try and get a rise out of him; such as of [[pickles]], [[homos]] or [[Sonic]]'s redesign in ''[[Sonic Boom]]''.
* Scathing e-mails, letters, or social media messages. It may be just plain sad to say, but even telling Chris to "get a job" has become ween lingo.
* Butting into conversations Chris is having with other people online, especially if he isn't doing anything particularly wrong at the moment (which is almost 99% of the time). This was sadly way too common with the [[DoopieDoOver]] saga.
* Attempting to contact people who once interacted with Chris but have since cut off all ties with him ([[Megan]], [[Cole]], [[the Wallflower]], [[Mary Lee Walsh]], [[Adam Stackhouse]], [[Michael Snyder]], etc.) and drag them back into the spotlight against their wishes.
* Terrible fanfiction and fanart that "wittily" deconstructs ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' and [[CWCville|where it takes place]] as a saccharine dystopia. Sorry folks, but ''[[Asperchu]]'', ''[[A Girl Who Brought Down the World]]'', ''[[Sonichu the Animated Series|Sonichu: The Animated Series]]'' and ''CWCollateral'' not only '''all''' already did this, but have also milked the concept for everything it's worth. Double dumbass points if your fan work is even more [[Chris and art|grotesque]], [[Episode 21|gory]], or [[Episode 17|perverse]] than ''Sonichu'' already is, as seen in the picture below-right. Triple dumbass points if focusing predominantly on the slaughter of [[Sonees and Roseys]].
* Mass reporting in an attempt to get his social media accounts shut down.
* Spouting tired old Chris memes in places where Christorians lurk, or even in places where most of the members don't even know about Chris. Either way, it's very annoying.
* Spoiling Chris's legitimate attempts at doing [[Chris and art|commissions]] and participating in [[Chris and contests|contests]] or e-commerce. This extends to making frivolous or exaggerated claims of Chris's misconduct in feedback on sites like [[eBay]] or [[YouTube]].
* Sending unwanted mail to Chris's address, like [[April 2019 videos#Bonus! LACK OF Glitter Bombing. 🔥Epic Burn!🔥|glitter bombs]] and letters for [[PewDiePie]].
* Making [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y87AvTrK9Dc terrible rap songs] about Chris.
* [[TF2 Analysis|Harassing bronies whose content Chris enjoys into blocking him on Twitter.]]
* [https://www.reddit.com/r/ChrisChanSonichu/comments/e3vdae/the_result_of_what_happened_when_i_tried_to/| Re-creating his Wikipedia page as a social experiment.]
* Spamming his tweets with "Where's the comics?". He's not going to respond, so don't even try.
* Hacking into Chris's YouTube account to upload a video of someone screaming "JULAAAAY"!
* Sending letters to Chris to persuade him into saying or doing things while [[Messiah complex|under the belief he is Jesus]].
* [[Jail Letter - 21 October 2021|Translating Ian Brandon Anderson into a writing system Chris doesn’t understand and telling him it’s a blessing in another language.]]
* [https://kiwifarms.net/threads/49854/post-11683809 Writing a fake letter, claiming it to be sent by Chris in an undisclosed location, and directing it towards another lolcow.]
* [https://reddit.com/r/ChrisChanSonichu/comments/10k8nj3/chris_chan_porn_video_gofundme/ Funding a pornographic film about Chris.]
* [[:File:9zkfdgibmrxa1.png|Leaving one-star reviews on places Chris has visited because Chris visited them.]]
* [https://www.reddit.com/r/ChrisChanSonichu/comments/15oqgk7/christine_can_still_become_rich_and_live_a/ Suggesting Chris should start an OnlyFans.]
* Making fake obituaries stating [[Barb]] or any other Christorical figures have died.
* [[Post-jail_sightings_(2023)#Sheetz(September)/On_the_road_Part_II|Chasing down Chris and trying to shove a camera in his face after seeing him in public.]]
* Donating your own money for the sole purpose of flashing messages like "JULAAAAAAY!" And "IAN BRANNAN SOMETHING!" or anything related to [[Affair with Mother|Chris's affair with Barb]] during his livestreams, especially when it has nothing to do with the topic(s).
* [[December 2023 social media posts#12_Previous_Lives|Telling Chris about his past lives.]]
* [https://ghostarchive.org/varchive/dsbtm3J8DXs Giving Chris money to ask for his thoughts on your shitty YouTube videos.] Worse still is creating AI videos claiming to be Chris and [[Christ Chan Live Stream: OG Cwcville (Cwcville)-60 Minecraft|giving him money so he'll watch them.]]
* Impersonating Christorical Figures
* Even cringier still, [[March 2025 social media posts#AI Sarah x Wes|attempting to make AI art]] copying Chris's style, and claiming you commissioned him to make it.
* Worst of all, [[Chris and the law|breaking the law]] and [[A-Logging#There.27s_no_legal_defense_over_attacking_Chris_for_real|needlessly risking a life-altering criminal record]] in pursuit of lulz. This includes, but is certainly not limited to; vandalizing or trespassing on Chris's [[14 Branchland Court|property]] (which includes egging his house), illegally recording telephone conversations, stalking and harassment of him, his mother and the rest of their extended family, stealing from them, [[Idea Guys|extortion]], or [[Death threats|threatening them]] with violence or even outright murder. This also applies to aiding and/or encouraging other weens or Chris himself to do so. '''We ''really'' shouldn't have to say it at this point, but for fuck's sake, ''DON'T DO ANY OF THIS.'''''

== What weening is NOT ==
As annoying and unhelpful as weening is, the term has ended up being severely misused by much of the CWCsphere, to the point where some consider it to be ''any'' form of interest or interaction at any point with Chris or the world relating to him and his misadventures. As such, it's important to keep in mind what actions are not considered the correct definition of the term:
* Casual observation and discussion of Chris and his circumstances, in places (such as [[CWCki|this very wiki]], or [[Kiwi Farms]]) where they are permitted and/or actually relevant to the topic at hand.
* Any trolling plan that actually succeeds to some extent; be it good or bad for Chris, original or cringey, et cetera.<ref group="note">About 99.9% of the time, this doesn't happen, so don't bother trying.</ref>
* Asking [[FAQ|basic, repetitive Chris questions]] as a newbie. Regardless of if it's to do with recent events or those from the Classic Era and such, even the most devoted Christorians had to start somewhere.
* Coming up with speculative Christory based on past and ongoing events.
* Making fan media (art, fanfiction, animations, cosplay, etc.) of the [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'' series]], so long as it's not excessively perverse, grotesque or intentionally poorly made, and you don't go out of your way to show it to Chris.
* Helping to document and provide information on developments and occurrences in Chris's life as they come. The same goes for any corrections and confirmations (with appropriate evidence) of ambiguous and/or unconfirmed information.
* Visiting public locations where Chris is well-known to have been or is otherwise associated with; such as the [[Charlottesville Fashion Square]], [[The GAMe PLACe|Gearharts]], [[The End Games]] or [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]]. Of course, this is so long as you don't try to failtroll or otherwise harass anyone for info on Chris. If you do visit these places, consider doing some good out of it as well by supporting them and the local community through donating to (if applicable) and/or purchasing from them.
* Visiting [[14 Branchland Court]], so long as it doesn't involve illegally trespassing or trying to harass Barb or anyone who resides there.

==Arguments against trolling attempts==
[[Image:REALChrisChanAndFriends.jpg|thumb|[[The Miscreants]], grateful to get away from all of the weens leeching off their hard work.]]

Now, we know what you're thinking. You're not one of those try-hard [[BlueSpike|13-year old boys]] who still think that screaming "'''JULAAAAAY!!!'''" or "'''IAN! BRANNON! SOMETHING!!!'''" at Chris, spamming his Twitter or YouTube comment section with pickles and other outdated catchphrases and memes, making and sending him badly-made parody comics, or trying to re-hash the [[Liquid Chris|Liquid Chris Saga]] is the height of wit. You've come up with a great plan to really get under Chris's skin, bring back the good old days and all that shit. However, <del>while you ''may'' in fact be that guy,</del> 99.9% of the time, you should just shitcan your trolling plans and move on with your life.

Why, you ask?

===The Chris of today is nothing like his former self===

Chris has gone a long way since his internet debut on the Something Awful Forums. He has gone from a simple-minded man with child-like tendencies that made a bunch of [[Sonichu (comic)|comics which are so bad they're fascinating]], to a jaded, chronically-depressed and mentally-disturbed hippie that's formed a small doomsday cult around said comics.

It is important to note that Chris, although still very gullible and severely detached from reality, is (debatably) still a thinking person. Whatever gets him riled up nowadays ultimately depends on the time and situation. Therefore, a lot of [[Sonic Boom|the]] [[Pickle|commonly]] [[Homos|associated]] [[Asperger syndrome|triggers]] he had years ago will not necessarily transfer over to the present day.

It should also be noted that, because of this change in perspective, trolling hits differently in this day and age than it did before Chris lost his father; which is incidentally the point where most of Chris's most famous trolls opted to leave him alone. The general culture around Chris-Chan himself has changed significantly as well; while past trolls like [[Clyde Cash]] and [[Liquid Chris]] were praised for a time, and are still fondly remembered and respected by those who don't see them as being as bad as Chris, the days of trolling Chris as the heteronormative, egoistical manchild have faded to trolling Chris as a mentally-ill, self-destructive, broken shell of a human being. The only people to really succeed in gaining infamy comparable to the trolls of the Classic Era – such as the [[Idea Guys]] and [[Jacob Sockness]] – are subsequently derided as the perverted, exploitative abusers that they are, rather than treated as internet legends.

The irony in all of this is that most trolling attempts no longer phase Chris at all, and those that do somehow succeed are only viewed as [[Enablers|further support for his cult]]. Therefore, you should never expect to be [[The Miscreants|one of the cool kids]] just by failtrolling Chris. Times have changed, so it’s best to move on to better targets. This leads us into the next point.

===There are (and always will be) much better targets than Chris===
If you're willing to put that much effort into trolling Chris, why not make yourself useful and apply that same effort to going after better victims? As much as the CWCki analyses and discusses in detail [[Tomgirl|his]] [[April 16 Fetish Vids|numerous]] [[Honest Content|odd]] [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|behaviors]] and [[Chris and his ego|per]][[Chris and reality|son]][[Chris and hypocrisy|ali]][[Chris and Remorse|ty]] [[Chris and anger|fla]] [[Chris and race|ws]], Chris doesn't even come ''close'' to the bottom of the barrel of internet scumbags. [[Beel|Neo-nazis]] and [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|other hate groups]], [[white knight|social justice warriors]], [[Blanca Weiss|abusive lovers]] and [[Barb|parents]], [[Joshua Martinez|scam artists]], [[pedofork|pedophiles]] and [[Zapina Rosechu|ephebophiles]], [[Allison Amber|corrupt]] [[Pmurt|politicians]] and [[4-cent_garbage.com|corporations]], [[Angelica Rosechu|religious zealots]], [[Chris and sex#Bestiality|zoophiles]] [[Clover and Snoopy|and other animal abusers]], [[Collosal Chris-Chan|hackers, script kiddies and malware writers/distributers]], [[JuggaloShoutOut|gang]] [[(Clyde's) Trollsta's Paradise|members]], [[Twin Falling Towers|terrorists and their online recruiters]], [[A-Logging|A-Logs]], [[Enablers]], and many other assorted shitbirds are much, ''much'' more deserving of concentrated trolling than Chris will ever be.

Even if you don't give a shit who the trollbait is as long as you get Laughs Under Lucricities, the Chris of today just isn't as amenable to trolling as he used to be; as discussed beforehand. The amount of effort you would need to put into navigating around his paranoia and autistic sensibilities would be staggering to say the least. And even if you do manage to bypass these obstacles, ''what is there left to do to him?'' Anything amusing about him has already been exhausted, except the shit he does on his own initiative, also discussed further below. All that is left of him at this point is a withered husk of a lolcow; as much as you may try to milk it, you'll be hard-pressed not to get only cobwebs, dust and shrivelled dead insects in return. With that in mind, you may as well just spend your time on another lolcow who hasn't been inured to years of deceit and humiliation.

For most aspiring trolls, the only reason to pick Chris over any other Internet jackass is because he's relatively well-known even today, and you have a ready-made audience available to appreciate your efforts. But that's just you being lazy, not some trolling mastermind.

===The Chris of today is not (quite) as gullible as he used to be===
Granted, almost no one on Earth is as [[naïve]] as Chris was in [[2007]]. However, since then Chris has gradually learned that when he's contacted by people claiming to be [[Shigeru Miyamoto]], [[Prank calls#Batman Call|Batman]], [[Vanessa Hudgens]], someone from his past, or [[Savannah Chandler|even his own relatives]], chances are he's just being trolled. In fact, the naivety of the younger Chris has been swapped for an extreme distrust of anyone who tries to contact him, to the extent where he's even turned down legitimate attempts to get in touch by people he actually knew at [[high school]] or [[college]].

This hasn't been helped at all by weens; according to [[Seinor prom|seinor]] trolls, Chris was once contacted by ''10 people'' claiming to be Megan at the same time, all of them claiming to be the [[TRUE and HONEST]] Megan and telling him not to believe the others.

Chris also vets those who try to bait him with fake social media accounts of people he follows. Weens tried this during the Doopie saga, only for Chris to embarrass them by thoroughly debunking their claims, complete with evidence.<ref>[[Misc texts#Fake Doopie profile]]</ref><ref>[[August 2017 tweets#Outsmarted a ween, with help of Kiwi Farms]]</ref>

As of today, Chris simply doesn’t care about whatever hackneyed, inane scheme you’ve come up with for him. Even the most persistent attempts at bribery don’t seem to affect him as much as they used to.

===Your idea is probably not original===
[[File:NotLiquidComic.jpg|thumb|left|A tryhard trying to rehash Liquid Chris's success... somehow drawn even ''worse'' than ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' itself.]]
Whatever your scheme is, it's probably been done before, and most likely better. It's pretty much impossible to top getting Chris to believe that the [[Miyamoto emails|President of Nintendo]] was interested in his work, or that there was a DANG, DIRTY IMPOSTER whom everyone else thought was the ''real'' Chris and stealing his richly deserved fame,<ref group=note>This idea worked once in the right circumstances; there's no need to repeat it now, where Chris believes he's a goddess and a reincarnate of Jesus.</ref> or convincing Chris to [[The MovingFoward videos|destroy his own life upgrade on-camera]] in an attempt to claim [[Trollin Train|a $9,001 bounty that never actually existed]], or even simply pulling some strings to [[Bob Walks In|have Chris's father walk in on him masturbating]]. By and large, most modern trolling plans tend to be some incredibly minor variation on something that's already been done (for example, ''"what if we got his [[Amnyfest Ring|high school ring]]?"'' or ''"what if we got him to see another parody of his comic?"''). In short, you're wasting your time trying to rehash older trolling events, because we've all seen it before. More importantly, so has Chris, who would very likely figure out where you're going with it too.

===Weenery discourages Chris from producing content===
Chris is at his most productive when he believes he has lots of fans and everyone, barring a few trolls here and there, loves him. Most agree that weenery is detrimental to this strange, symbiotic relationship, and it is considered to be one of the predominant causes of the slump in content between [[2011]] and [[2014]]. In that time, Chris entered a hiatus as a result of a combination of mourning for his [[Bob|then-recently deceased father]], and a constant stream of weenery over the years that made him think of himself as a victim who wouldn't be able to do anything without being harassed. As a result, he became far more private, meaning barely any content for us. It took several long years for him to re-emerge from this hiatus.

It is also worth mentioning that Chris produces much better content when left to his own devices. Since his semi-retreat from the public eye after his father's death and before he was jailed for [[Affair with Mother|incest]], Chris has been [[28 October 2011|prosecuted]] [[26 December 2014|twice]], concocted [[October 2013 Facebook Posts#Megagi La Skunk agrees that you should have never been born|outlandish conspiracy theories]] centered on [[Megan Schroeder|someone he hasn't spoken to for years]], [[2014 house fire|accidentally set fire to his house]], eventually continued working on the previously-unfinished [[Sonichu #11]] again, and [[Un-clit 2.0|sliced his own taint open with a knife]] as part of a hair-brained attempt to grow his own [[china]]; all of this without ''any'' impetus from trolls. Likewise, let's not forget the entire [[Mary Lee Walsh]] saga (along with at least [[The Tale Of The Crazy Pacer|two]] [[University of Virginia#UVA student on Chris|different]] independent blogs of Chris's bizarre mannerisms and behaviors) happened before he even rose to fame. Don't rush the master of [[Kick the Autistic|America's favorite game]].

===If you fail hard enough, you will become a target for trolls yourself===
[[File:NullvulgarWeen.jpg|thumb|During the [[Guard Dogs|Guard Dog]] [[saga]], [[Null]] saw to it that weens would face particularly aggressive responses if they attempted to lure Chris through e-mail.]]
Anthony "A-Log" LoGatto is ''the'' textbook example of trolling backfiring on the would-be troll, and it's important to remember that he would never have attracted the attention of the internet if he had simply toned down the vitriol enough to make it less obvious that he was absolutely obsessed with Chris. It was thereafter a fairly obvious leap in intuition to assume that someone with that level of hysteria and monomania over someone they had never even met would have had some skeletons in their own closet; not surprisingly, A-Log had more than a few. These included terrible homemade yiff fanfiction featuring a [[pickle|tellingly moderately-endowed]] fox OC, a huge cache of disturbing cartoon Rule 34 (a noticeable portion of which included [[Pedofork|underage characters]]), a laughably-poor college radio show from which he almost got fired after being caught watching pornography in the studio, and a video where A-Log does an excruciatingly unfunny stand-up "comedy" bit, revolving almost entirely around attacking Chris and what the radio was playing at the time; all before a crowd who, judging by their reaction, had never even heard of Chris.

A more recent example of this is the case of [[Michael Hirtes]]. After a myriad of sockpuppet accounts, spam messages to Chris and anyone he conversed with numbering in the thousands (mostly consisting of outdated memes and ''ad hominem'' attacks) and enough angry rants for him to ''also'' be described as being truly obsessed with Chris, it naturally led to some digging. Sure enough, Hirtes was revealed to be an unemployed furry who is somehow even less mature and more prone to [[Chris and anger|tard rage]] than Chris despite being nearly 20 years older than him, and having a number of highly-embarrassing things to his name, including criminal convictions and a newspaper article of him in a fursuit discussing yiffing. Consequently, he became a huge laughing stock overnight; not only turning into a lolcow himself, but it even got to be the point where [[Michael Hirtes#Chris's view on Hirtes|Chris himself dismissed Hirtes, and by extension everything he'd done, as an irrelevance]].

By the same token, obsessive and excessive weenery is dangerously likely to get you noticed by other trolls who will, in turn, hoist you on your own petard. In other words, it's akin to plugging in a huge neon sign pointing the trolls straight to your collection of ''[[Dragon Ball Z|Goku]] x [[Nazis|Anne Frank]]'' slash fiction and boy band shrines.

Even successful trolls can become targets. After several months manipulating Chris, the [[Idea Guys]] had their real-world identities exposed in the first half of [[2018]]. Between [[October 2017]] and [[March 2020]], [[Kiwi Farms]] officially encouraged users to <abbr title="Publish identifying information, such as home addresses.">dox</abbr> weens as a deterrent.<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/lunatics-who-attack-a-mentally-handicapped-person.35124/ Lunatics who attack a mentally handicapped person: Your name here]</ref> Several would-be weens have been foiled this way, and the effects have possibly spread into their real lives. Chris himself has also carelessly exposed those who try to interact with him while remaining anonymous.<ref>[[Other enablers#Sarah and Steven]]</ref> Remember, there is an [[Special:ActiveUsers|energetic community]] devoted to recording every facet of Chris's life and interactions. '''You ''will'' be noticed''', and as covered in more detail below, the attention you'll end up receiving will likely be the undesirable kind, even if you ''do'' somehow catch Chris's attention.

Due to her edgy behavior, [[A-logging]] directed towards Chris, attempts at weening Chris, and spreading misinformation when faced with being doxed, [[Bella]] has been widely disgraced by the greater CWCsphere as a result.

===Even if you do succeed, you will likely regret it later===
{{quote|Chris-Chan is — he’s an enigma which to so many people — [[CWCki:Frequently Asked Questions#Trolling|they thought he was a troll]]. Because they’re like, “there’s no way this motherfucker is real”, because he’s like, the saddest human being ever. And it’s SAD because it’s like… I spent four years of my life fucking with him, and people are like, “bring it back!”. And I’m like, “NO! LET IT DIE”. It’s like, depressing — it’s not the golden age — it’s the depressing age.|Spazkid, on the unwanted attention he receives from weens to this day.}}

{{quote|There's been tons of things in my life I've regretted and hated doing later on, [[Saga#Julie Saga .28February - March 2009.29|all of the stuff from 10 years ago]] was one of them. I've moved past everything that happened those many years ago and obviously I'm a different person now. It wasn't funny and was a very a-log thing to do. Nothing much else I can say.|[[BlueSpike]], reflecting on his time since the Julie Saga.}}

All too often, trolls that do somehow manage to succeed in extracting lulz from Chris end up getting more than they bargained for. For example, Spazkid stopped making ''[[Sonichu the Animated Series]]'' when he began to pity Chris and realized he wasn't worth trolling (on top of a lot of unseen drama involved with the series' writers and voice actors), but still regularly finds himself, as seen above, hounded by obsessive weens and A-Logs to keep making it against his wishes. Liquid Chris may have to spend a long time fending off accusations from people outside of the Chris-Chan bubble of tormenting an [[slow-in-the-minds|emotionally vulnerable autistic man]] for his own amusement. BlueSpike will turn 30 someday, and even then will still be thought of as the crazed, sadistic pervert who, [[Pedofork|at the age of 13]], willingly listened to a 27-year-old [[CWC Cums for a Cat|masturbate repeatedly for]] [[Bob Walks In|hours on end]] and [[Julie reveals herself|forced him to shove a broken clay medallion up his ass]], even after [[BlueSpike#Today|he has since considerably matured and openly shown remorse for his previous actions]]. The Idea Guys may have to deal with many long-term legal troubles one day for manipulating a mentally-handicapped man into abusing himself and extorting frivolities and large sums of money from him, all for a stupid, cruel joke that amused no one but themselves.

To add to the irony, people who didn't intentionally upset Chris are still getting unwanted attention from weens. Do you think [[Adam Stackhouse]] enjoys being inundated by various unwanted ''"you prevented Chris from raping Megan, congrats!"'' messages in his e-mail inbox, especially since [[Adam Stackhouse#Adam revisited|he openly made peace with Chris in 2018?]] Or that [[Mary Lee Walsh]] appreciates seeing herself as a nubile anime blonde who exists solely to torment a [[virgin with rage]] every time she or her students uses Google? Or that [[Michael Snyder]] likes being constantly reminded by weens of [[28 October 2011|being harassed and hit by a car]] through misguided attempts to praise him, or [[The_GAMe_PLACe#Today|being tormented about said events almost ''a decade'' later, on the guestbook of his own father's funeral?]] In all of these cases, the answer is a big, fat '''NO'''.

===There is absolutely nothing left to gain the community surrounding Chris===
Not only do you have [[Kiwi Farms|the active Chris-Chan community]] who are more than willing to come after most wannabes who attempt to do so, but also how the consequences will, in such circumstances, very likely end up spreading into your actual life; as has been seen on numerous occasions. Even without going in with the intention to troll, fan documentaries and information sources (such as [[CWCki|this very wiki]]) already extensively cover Chris and his life, and when new events and such occur, it's more than likely already covered by them without you needing to dig too deeply.

==See also==
*[[A-Logging]]
*[[Enablers]]
*[[Michael Hirtes]], an infamous ween.
*[[Isabella Loretta Janke]], the prime example of how attempted trolling can backfire.

{{Notes}}
{{References}}
{{Articleofthenow}}
{{Unholy}}

[[Category:Trolling]]

Nintendo Power Magazine

2025-04-30T06:42:19Z

Alan Pardew: I only returned briefly because I saw this extra "=". See you all again someday, or not.

'''''Nintendo Power''''' was a magazine devoted to promoting [[Nintendo]]'s video games, consoles, and so on and so forth, as well as providing cheat codes, strategy guides, sneak peeks at upcoming releases, and anything else one might want to know about Nintendo products. The magazine debuted in summer 1988, and was first self-published by Nintendo of America, before switching to Future US in 2007.

Being a [[Nintendo]] fanboy, [[Chris]] was an avid subscriber of it starting in the [[1990s]]. He would frequently submit letters and/or items to the magazine, plastered his [[Chris's room (14 Branchland Court)|room]] with posters from the magazine, and actually got his first ''[[Pokémon]]'' [[Card games|trading card]] in an issue. He even appeared in some issues, giving him and [[Sonichu]] their first glimpses of substantial coverage. Even though dozens of fans were featured in every issue in some form (fan art, fan mail, etc.), Chris firmly believed that making into the magazine was an honor of the highest degree, and that the people over at the magazine actually remembered who he was from the five minutes of fame he had years ago. He also seemed to believe that being featured in the magazine would be a one way ticket to getting a job with Nintendo.

In [[December 2012]], the magazine ceased publication.

==The hand-drawn magazine==
{{main|Homemade Nintendo Power magazine}}

Chris maintained constant mail contact with the magazine. One of his letters was about a dream he had where Sega made a [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] game for the Game Boy. Not wanting such a good idea to go to waste, Chris then [[Homemade Nintendo Power magazine|freaking hand-drew his own issue of ''Nintendo Power'']], with pencils, marker, and printed-out, cut-and-pasted text. This self-produced magazine detailed how Sonic arbitrarily transferred to Nintendo consoles to release a trio of Sonic games... which are direct copies of existing Mario games. Notably, it's Chris's first major attempt at [[Sonichu (comic)|slavishly recreating a commercial product by hand]], as well as the first appearance of [[Bionic]] the Hedgehog.

==The Animal Crossing documentary==
As the years went by, Chris would get better luck with Nintendo correspondence. In the May [[2004]] issue, Chris, credited as "[[Sonichu]]", was highlighted for his jaw-dropping [[Animal Crossing Documentary|video about his daily life in ''Animal Crossing'']]. ''Nintendo Power'' heaped praise upon the proto-Let's Play, focusing (unsurprisingly) more on Chris's character Sonichu and his in-game accomplishments than the lonesome manchild behind the mask or why he was called Sonichu. Nonetheless, Chris took this as a great stride forward in his quest to achieve video game superstardom without having to exert any effort or develop any kind of skill.

It seems incredible, but someone was actually paid to watch Chris's video for an hour and then write about it; one can only wonder how that person felt about Chris casually [[So Need a Cute Girl|singing]] about his [[Virgin With Rage|sexual frustration]]. Note that many of the unique achievements mentioned are actually basic functions of the game any six year old can discover.

===Transcript===
{{quotenews|'''Sonichu’s Cwcville Documentary'''

Simply amazing. There’s no other way to describe what we received from Sonichu of Cwcville—a full video documentary that walked us through his daily life. His opulent manor contained every manner of furniture. Cwcville’s landscape was filled to the bursting point with all the animals who’d moved to his well-tended town. And Sonichu has customized everything about his town—even many villagers have followed his bold trends, wearing the patterns he has created!

''(Image captions:)''

Sonichu has packed the museum with his fads—its bug collection is hopping.

He often visits Sonichu Island to bring its high-value coconuts to town.

And he uses the spare hut on the island to store his huge collection of oddities.

Cwcville is brimming with Sonichu’s patterns, including the popular Poké Ball.}}

==The ''Sprung'' letter==
Chris's second (and last-known) appearance in Nintendo Power was in the March/April [[2005]] issue, where he sent a letter detailing how the DS pseudo-dating sim ''[[Sprung]]'' helped him (''very'' briefly) get over his [[Noviophobia|fear of girls with boyfriends]].

==Transcript==
{{quotenews|'''DS Equals Dating Service'''

I recently purchased a Nintendo DS and a copy of Sprung. I originally bought the game, because I needed some lessons on what to say to, or do for, a girl. To make a long story short, I developed a fear that all the pretty girls are already paired up with a boyfriend. I’ve dubbed this social phobia, Noviophobia, after the Spanish word for boyfriend. Anyway, before Sprung, I was afraid to approach most women (FYI, I’m 22-years old). I tried to silently attract a boyfriend-free girl, mostly with signs, for over one year and four months. Then Sprung provided me with general things to say and do, so I felt more confident. When I tried my new-found expressions from the dating simulator, I forgot my fear of the infinitely high boyfriend factor, and I met a couple of lady friends with whom I feel more comfortable. So thank you, Nintendo and Ubisoft, for the dating advice that this frustrated virgin needed.

Christian C.

Via the Internet}}

==Gallery==
<gallery>
File:390-NPVol179.jpg|A scrapbook image.
File:394-NPVol190.jpg|Another scrapbook image
File:393-CWCSprung.jpg|Now if only the women weren't afraid of him...
File:Nintendochris.JPG|Chris explains that he has "[[noviophobia|noviophobia]]" [sic].
File:389-CWCSchuCross.jpg|Yay!
</gallery>

==See also==
*[[Animal Crossing Documentary]]
*[[Homemade Nintendo Power magazine|Homemade ''Nintendo Power'' magazine]]
*''[[Sprung]]''

[[Category:Video Games]]

Template:Article of the now

2018-04-01T10:56:39Z

Alan Pardew: Revival of a 6 year old April Fools joke

[[File:Cwc bronycon 2017 1.jpg|left|200px]]

<s>'''Christopher'''</s> <s>'''Christian'''</s> '''Christine Weston Chandler''' (24 February [[1982]] - 1 April [[2018]]) is a 36-year-old autistic <s>manchild</s> [[Tomgirl Saga|trans woman]], former [[virgin with rage]], and [[Things Chris has ripped off|creator]] of the infamous [[Sonichu]].

('''[[Christian_Weston_Chandler|more...]]''')

<noinclude>{{clear}}{{Usage|1= This template sits pride of place on the CWCki [[Main Page]]. It is a way of displaying some of the better quality articles on the CWCki. It is not usually the article that describes the most recent Chris-related event, though it often can be. Suggestions for new articles to be displayed here can be discussed either on [[Template_talk:Article_of_the_now|this template's talk page]], or on the [[CWCki:Community Portal‎]].}}[[Category:Front page templates]] [[Category: Pages that have been edited by Chris]]</noinclude>

Template:Da update

2018-04-01T10:54:53Z

Alan Pardew: Time to revive a 6 year old April Fool's joke now that I'm back for a while. Will definitely revert soon.

<center>[[Image:News.jpg]]</center>
* 1 April - Chris, to avoid jail time, hangs himself with a [[Wikipedia:April_Fool's_Day|wireless PS4 controller]].
*31 March - [[Love is Love]], a song written and performed by Chris, with a boy band providing the music, is uncovered. Chris [[March 2018 social media posts|denies the fan theory that his new girlfriend is a MLP doll]]. He also [[March 2018 social media posts|apologizes to jewish people and claims to be part-Jew and part-African after taking an ancestry survey]].
*30 March - A continuance is issued for [[Chris and the Law#2018|the Trespass After Forbidden charge]]. The case will resume on 8 May.
*29 March - Chris [[March 2018 social media posts|rambles about fictional characters and Mary Sues]].
*28 March - In response to a fan who questioned him over Barb's signature being real, Chris records [[Our signatures]].
*27 March - Albemarle County files a criminal charge against Chris for trespassing. [[2018 Sales Listings|A Gameboy with Tetris]] is listed and sold for $150 by Chris.
*26 March - Chris [[March 2018 social media posts|announces that his sweetheart search is over]]... yet again. He later mentions that the supposed relationship involves three people.

<noinclude>{{clear}}{{Usage|1= This template sits in a place of pride on the CWCki [[Main Page]]. It is a list of recent Chris-related activity, namely new content. To prevent the list becoming too long, older entries should be removed as newer ones are added - with '''no more than 7 entries''' being displayed. To add new update to the list, simply edit this template and place a brief description of what happened at the top of bulleted list. Entries should also be documented on the [[{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}} {{CURRENTYEAR}}|current month article]].}}[[Category:Front page templates]]</noinclude>

CWCki:Community Portal

2018-04-01T10:36:06Z

Alan Pardew: I'm back, but don't expect me to be here too much.

{|
|-
| align=center |
{| class="wikitable"
|-
! colspan=3 | Navigation
|-
| align=center | [[CWCki:News]]
| align=center | [https://kiwifarms.net/ Forums (Kiwi Farms)]
| align=center | [[CWCki:Policy]]
|-
| align=center | [[CWCki:Help]]
| align=center | [[CWCki:Technical]]
| align=center | [[CWCki:General]]
|-
| colspan=3 align=center |'''Old Archive:''' [[CWCki:Community Portal/Archive 1|1]] [[CWCki:Community Portal/Archive 2|2]] [[CWCki:Community Portal/Archive 3|3]] [[CWCki:Community Portal/Archive 4|4]] [[CWCki:Community Portal/Archive 5|5]] [[CWCki:Community Portal/Archive 6|6]] [[CWCki:Community Portal/Archive 7|7]] [[CWCki:Community Portal/Archive 8|8]] [[CWCki:Community Portal/Archive 9|9]]
|}
|-
| align=center | Welcome to the new Community Portal! This page now acts as an actual portal to the other community discussion pages. Please use the appropriate page as you did the old Community Portal.
|}

CWCki Forums

2016-04-02T06:05:13Z

Alan Pardew: /* Chris's posts */ Small edits since it's Kiwi Farms now

{{quote|You God Damn Pinheads!!!! I have already told you; [[Chris]] has told you!!!! The Riddle's answer was the FUCKING PITTSBURG PIRATES!!!! CHRISTIAN IS NOT A GOD DAMNED [[Homos|HOMO]]!!!! CHRISTIAN IS [[STRAIGHT]]!!!! He gets [[Cakefarts|hard]] over women!! He vomits at [[JERKS|males]]!!

GET IT THROUGH YOUR GOD DAMNED, DEMENTED, THICK SKULLS, YOU GOD DAMNED PINHEADS!!!!

I should know very well, because I Am Christian Weston Chandler of [[Ruckersville]], [[Virginia|VA]], himself!!!!

You god damned males make me vomit, sick and [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|shit]]!!|Chris on 24 August 2013}}

[[File:137704626985.jpg|thumb|400px|This is basically it.]]

The [https://kiwifar.ms/forums/christian-weston-chandler.18/ '''CWCki Forums'''] is the former name of a web message board previously loosely affiliated with the [[CWCki]]. It is frequented by many of the wiki regulars and other people interested in all things Christorical. Its primary purpose is to allow users to discuss and speculate about Chris, without needing to do so in the [[CWCki:NAF|CWCki talk pages]]. It has received hundreds of thousands of posts on hundreds of different discussion topics about Chris over the years, and currently has thousands of posters, which can cause one to pause and either marvel at the enduring fascination of Chris as a subject matter, wonder who the ''actual'' autists are, or both. Previously existing as a stand-alone board in various iterations, in [[February 2015]] they were absorbed into a larger site re-branded as '''Kiwi Farms''', which focuses on lolcows (people and groups whose eccentric or foolish behavior can be "milked" for amusement and laughs) in general and not just Chris, although he remains the primary draw. The new name comes from [[speech impediment|the way several lolcows mispronounced "CWCki Forums"]] (like how Retsupurae is a mispronounced version of "Let's play").

It is known that Chris was posting on the forum in 2012 under nickname "paintingatree". In his few posts, he generally tried to defend himself under the guise of a remorseful troll. This fact alone, as well as his [[Chris and writing|writing style]] and posting habits (posting rarely, never in the same thread again and never trying to start a conversation with other users) made his presence somewhat a open secret. Surprisingly, Chris registered again under the same nickname in February 2013. He wrote the first post on 23 May, in which he made it clear that it was him. In spite of this, [[Slow-in-the-minds|in other posts he pretended to be someone else.]] As it could be expected, he was trying to defend himself again (mostly from accusations of being [[Homos|homosexual]], since many users, knowing that they're being watched, jokingly concluded that the meaning behind his absurd [[Facebook#The_Riddle|Facebook riddle]] is that Chris wants to [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|come out of the closet]]), and was very rude to the users in almost all of his posts. Being in the process of adding old friends from his [[Manchester High|high school]] on FB, he also asked if anybody found [[Tiffany Gowen]].

It's assumed that Chris lurks on the boards regularly, and screenshots of the forum have appeared on his [[Facebook]] account. His exact motivations for doing this are not clear, but it has been speculated that he intended to use the screen caps as proof of a troll conspiracy including [[Michael Snyder]]. Robert Bell, Chris's lawyer, was apparently unpersuaded by Chris's legal acumen and did not enter any screen caps into evidence.

__TOC__

==Forums structure==
The "Christian Weston Chandler" section of the Kiwi Farms is structured as:

* '''[https://kiwifar.ms/forums/christian-weston-chandler.18/ Christian Weston Chandler]''' - General discussion and speculation about Chris, his activities, and the world of [[Christory]]. Contains threads for random questions and speculation that is more eccentric or off-topic, such as: "''What if Chris preferred [[April_16_Fetish_Vids#Fanta:_Semen_Flavor|Purple Fanta]]?''"
**'''[https://kiwifar.ms/forums/updates.21/ Updates]''' - Curated posts with the latest news on Chris. Moderator approval for posts is required here, and only staff and VIP users can start new threads.
**'''[https://kiwifar.ms/forums/sonichu.20/ Sonichu]''' - Discussion of the [[Continuity_in_the_Sonichu_comics|Sonichu canon]].

==Chris's posts==
Below are the posts Chris wrote under pseudonym paintingatree between 23 May and 6 September 2013. Unfortunately, all of his posts from the old Forumer incarnation from 2012 seem to be lost. Chris's posts are in blue, while posts in threads he was responding to are in red.

===Re: DreamHost and a possible migration===
{{quoteboxred|'''by Marvin » Wed May 22, 2013 1:00 am'''
Uhh, all the cool kids use linode. Also, I'd whatever the whatever you're asking us to whatever, but I'm too drunk to do it properly and/or usefully right now, so, maybe when I'm sober.|Marvin <ref>[https://kiwifar.ms/threads/dreamhost-and-a-possible-migration.998/#post-65466]</ref>}}

And then, [[Pokémon|a wild Chris-Chan appears]]:

{{quotebox|'''by paintingatree » Thu May 23, 2013 7:36 am'''
Why don't you and that damn [[Cwcki]] just go ahead and die off the [[Internet]] already so I can finally find some peace of my life? <ref>[https://kiwifar.ms/threads/dreamhost-and-a-possible-migration.998/#post-65470]</ref>}}

===Re: Should Chris Consider Dating A 'Special' Girl?===
{{quoteboxred|'''by Thetan » Sat Jun 08, 2013 10:42 pm'''
Rather than constantly whining about how lonely he is, Chris should consider revising his sweetheart standards. He has set the bar far too high for himself. He couldn't even make things work out with Faeryn or The Wallflower.

Chris could do well with a 'special' girl: potentially someone mildly mentally retarded who enjoys the same childish things he does. They could enjoy each other's company, coloring and watching cartoons together. As long as they don't have unprotected sex, I don't see a problem with this type of relationship.

Such a person may actually find Chris interesting, look up to him, and hang onto his every word. The relationship would not only alleviate his loneliness, but be good for his ego as well.|Thetan <ref>[https://kiwifar.ms/threads/should-chris-consider-dating-a-special-girl.1183/]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|'''by paintingatree » Tue Aug 06, 2013 11:48 pm'''
In response to your question, I ask you a question. Would YOU, in full honesty, full truth, in your right mind, at all, date a "Special Girl"? How would you feel if you woke up the next morning with droning moaning and blather coming from the face next to you?<ref>[https://kiwifar.ms/threads/should-chris-consider-dating-a-special-girl.1183/page-6#post-77414]</ref>}}

===Re: Tiffany Gowen===
{{quotebox|'''by paintingatree » Wed Aug 14, 2013 8:20 pm'''
Hey, whatever happened to [[Tiffany Gowen|Tiffany]]? Didn't she get [[Merried Seinor Comic|married]] or something? Like, dude, where did she go; has anyone found her?<ref>[https://kiwifar.ms/threads/tiffany-gowen.1065/page-2#post-70608]</ref>}}

Most noteworthy response:

{{quoteboxred|'''by applecat » Fri Aug 16, 2013 10:14 am'''
I found her! It was tough because she didn't have a Facebook, but I made sure to send her a link to the CWCki so she would know to stay away from that horrible man. She was very disappointed in him, but she thanked me for the tip-off. That's one more gal-pal safe from Chris!|applecat <ref>[https://kiwifar.ms/threads/tiffany-gowen.1065/page-3#post-70624]</ref>}}

===Re: I had a conversation with my wife about Christian.===
{{quoteboxred|'''by The Dude » Sat Aug 17, 2013 9:41 am'''
I've told her a little about Christian back in the day, but haven't told her about any of the recent stuff like Tomgil, running over Snyder, stuff like that.

The conversation went like this:

Me: So let's have a hypothetical.

Mrs. Dude: OK.

Me: Let's say something happens to me and we're no longer together. For sake of argument let's say I died.

Mrs. Dude: Oh no!

Me: So I'm dead and gone, and you're single again. Enough time has passed that you want to get back out and find another man.

Mrs. Dude: OK.

Me: Now here's the rub; the only guy who wants to date you is fat, balding, doesn't bathe, has no job, dresses like a girl, and lives with his mother in a hoarded house. He also shits himself when he's upset.

Mrs. Dude: Ew! EEWWWWW!!!

Me: What do you do?

Mrs. Dude: Tell him to stay away and strongly consider becoming a lesbian.

Me: A wise choice.

Mrs. Dude: There's someone out there that you know about who fits that exact description, isn't there?

Me: Remember that guy I told you about on the internet? The guy I showed you the videos of him having a singing battle with my friend?

Mrs. Dude: The autistic kid with the fucked up Sonic thing?

Me: Yup.

Mrs. Dude: He SHITS himself?

Me: Yup.

Mrs. Dude: Oh my...why? That's just grody! EW! EEWWWW!!

Me: I know.

Do you ever have conversations with anyone about Chris? How have they gone?|The Dude <ref>[https://kiwifar.ms/threads/i-had-a-conversation-with-my-wife-about-christian.1721/]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|'''by paintingatree » Sat Aug 17, 2013 2:56 pm'''
You, sir, are NOT married; you are making as much fabrication up as Chris would. Your post is a fraud; you will never change my mind; You Are Pathetic. Ha. Ha. Ha. <ref>[https://kiwifar.ms/threads/i-had-a-conversation-with-my-wife-about-christian.1721/page-2#post-107433]</ref>}}

===Seriously? No one wants to finish [[Facebook#The_Riddle|Chris' Puzzle]]?===
{{quotebox|'''by paintingatree » Sat Aug 17, 2013 7:08 pm'''
You all aren't even going to figure the Links between the photos? I mean, I don't think they have the same common thread, but one still links to the other. The lemon cake is a favorite food of businesswomen, and Cuban is a businessman. A bakery in Delaware highly recommends lemon and almond cookies. Delaware Bue Hens; hens on a farm with tornados. It's not totally rocket science. <ref>[https://kiwifar.ms/threads/seriously-no-one-wants-to-finish-chris-puzzle.1725/]</ref>}}

===Re: Chris likes [[Manchester_High_School#Go_Lancers.21|the lancers]] on facebook.===
{{quotebox|'''by paintingatree » Mon Aug 19, 2013 3:10 pm'''
Oh, for God's Sake!!! [[Chris and sex|Did Chris not make it clear enough time and again that he is in Absolute Fact Fucking Straight?! He gets a hard on with a Woman! He gets Pukey Sick when seeing topless males! He freaking wears a bra to cover his own shame! He gets a hard on with WOMEN!!! Stop Mislabeling the Straight Man Already!!!]]

BTW: Cuban was born in Pittsburg; Pirates roam the seas with the Mayflower; there is a photo of Chris wearing a Pittsburg Pirates Cap. Also, when you want to call him Stupid, do not mislabel him there either!

[[Chris and hypocrisy|You all are pathetic, stupid, no ounce is common sense or intelligence at all!]] I do not know why I keep following you all at all!

Break Up the whole Group here already!!! <ref>[https://kiwifar.ms/threads/chris-likes-the-lancers-on-facebook.1713/page-9#post-106963]</ref>}}

===Christian Weston Chandler is STRAIGHT!!!!===
{{quotebox|'''by paintingatree » Sat Aug 24, 2013 1:59 pm'''
You God Damn Pinheads!!!! I have already told you; Chris has told you!!!! The Riddle's answer was the FUCKING PITTSBURG PIRATES!!!! CHRISTIAN IS NOT A GOD DAMNED HOMO!!!! CHRISTIAN IS STRAIGHT!!!! He gets hard over women!! He vomits at males!!

GET IT THROUGH YOUR GOD DAMNED, DEMENTED, THICK SKULLS, YOU GOD DAMNED PINHEADS!!!!

I should know very well, because I Am Christian Weston Chandler of Ruckersville, VA, himself!!!!

You god damned [[JERKS|males]] make me vomit, sick and [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|shit]]!! <ref>[https://kiwifar.ms/threads/christian-weston-chandler-is-straight.1760/]</ref>}}

===September 2 FB update; New Troll to "Welcome"===

Just after revealing himself in his previous post, Chris acts as if nothing happened. Instead of [[Calling Out|encouraging his trolls to harrass his perceived enemies]] directly in a quoted FB post, he does it by pretending to be one of them... and fails.

{{quotebox|'''by paintingatree » Mon Sep 2, 2013 9:22 am'''
He has posted Publically, and I quote:

I have just been intercepted by a Manajerk and an Offline Troll/Bully. Her name is [REDACTED]; works within the Mal-Wart region. Every Troll/Cyber-Bully should contact her at her email address of [REDACTED], and remind her that no one is to mess with an Autistic Person when they are in a depressed, sad, angry or foul mood, especially with the online reputation that was dragged through the worst mud, muck and bodily fluids that said Autistic Person has, and if his hatred of the XBox brand, and the number of Trolls that populate half to three-quarters of that brand, stand in the way of the foul mood, then that is Microsoft's Freaking Problem!

Yes! Let's Bother The Hell Out Of the Manajerk, and Give Her the Worst Day of Her Life!!!<ref>[https://kiwifar.ms/threads/september-2-fb-update-new-troll-to-welcome.1805/]</ref>}}

===Bann has happened again===
Chris again requests for a trolling plan to troll Ms.Manajerk which is according to his [[Facebook#Chris_Expresses His Outrage for Walmart|Facebook post]] on 6 [[September 2013]], ignoring the '''No trolling plans''' rule again.
{{quotebox|'''by paintingatree » Fri Sep 06, 2013 1:00 pm'''
Ha! I sincerely do not find anything credible about this forum that makes it Not-Trolling. We really should Troll (name redacted) now that she has followed in [[Michael Snyder]]'s steps now. She deserves revenge in Chris' name. <ref>[https://kiwifar.ms/threads/bann-has-happened-again.1851/]</ref>}}

===YOU ALL DO NOTHING BUT CONTINUE TO TROLL PEOPLE!!!===
After getting the responses he doesn't desire, Chris then tard rages and shows off his huge [[Chris and his ego|ego]] about how [[Chris and copyright|taking his words and content without permission or consent is trolling and cyber-bullying.]] Again, he pretends as if he is not Chris at all.
{{quotebox|'''by paintingatree » Fri Sep 06, 2013 9:02 pm'''
IF this was NOT a Trolling Forum, you all would NOT be talking at all about Christian. [[Chris and his ego|The more you talk about him, AND bother him in ANY Communications, AND take his words and content without permission or consent, THE MORE YOU BASTARDS ARE SO TROLLING AND CYBER-BULLYING!!!]]

DESTROY THIS FORUM AND THE DAMN CWCKI NOW!!!<ref>[https://kiwifar.ms/threads/you-all-do-nothing-but-continue-to-troll-people.1855/]</ref>}}

==Gallery of screencaps Chris took of the CWCki forum and posted on [[Facebook]]==
<center>
<gallery>
File:Readinposts.PNG|Chris mocks board regular "Lucrid" and assures us the [[JenkinsJinkies]] sodomy story was made up.
File:Koreans.PNG|Chris denigrates Korean cuisine due to a misunderstanding.
File:No_trolling_plans.jpg|"No Trolling Plans"; Who the f*** are they kidding?" - [[Facebook#No_trolling_plans|Chris, over Facebook]]
File:CWCKiForumsPoll.jpg|Right; I'm ugly as hell. <nowiki>|:(</nowiki>
</gallery>
</center>
[[Category: Websites]]

==See also==
* [[CWCki]]
* [[Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia]]
* [[Trollin' Train]]
* [[Sonichu Girls]]
* [[GameFAQs]]

==References==
<references/>

==External link==
*[https://kiwifar.ms/forums/christian-weston-chandler.18/ CWCki forums]

{{The Internet}}

[[Category:Things Chris hates]]

Main Page

2016-04-02T05:59:39Z

Alan Pardew: Reverted edits by Alan Pardew (talk) to last revision by HugMePlz

{| id="mp-topbanner" style="width:100%; background:#fcfcfc; margin-top:1.2em; border:1px solid #ccc;"
| style="width:100%; color:#000;" |

{| style="width:100%; border:none; background:none;"
| style="width:50%; text-align:center; white-space:nowrap; color:#000;" |
<div style="font-size:162%; border:none; margin:0; padding:.1em; color:#000;">Welcome to the [[CWCki]]!</div>
<div style="top:+0.2em; font-size:95%;">The [[TRUE and HONEST]] encyclopedia about [[Christian Weston Chandler]].</div>
<div style="top:+0.2em; font-size:95%;">''WHERE NO [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|SHIT]] IS TOO [[Duck|MINOR]]! ''</div>
<div id="articlecount" style="width:100%; text-align:center; font-size:85%;">We currently have [[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] articles...and counting!</div>
|}

| style="width:50%; font-size:100%;" |
[[File:CWCiki Introduction.jpg]]
|}


{| id="mp-tfp" style="margin:4px 0 0 0; width:100%; background:none;"
| class="MainPageBG" style="width:100%; border:1px solid #ddcef2; background:#faf5ff; vertical-align:top; color:#000;"|
{| cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="vertical-align:top; background:#faf5ff; color:#000; width:100%"
! <h2 id="mp-tfp-h2" style="margin:0; background:#ddcef2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #afa3bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em">Quote of the Now</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | {{Quote of the now}}
|}
|}


{| id="mp-tfp" style="margin:4px 0 0 0; width:100%; background:none;"
| class="MainPageBG" style="width:100%; border:1px solid #EEDC82; background:#FFE4B5; vertical-align:top; color:#000;"|
{| cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="vertical-align:top; background:#FFE4B5; color:#000; width:100%"
| style="color:#000;" | {{Check this out}}
|}
|}


{| id="mp-upper" style="margin:0 0 0 0; background:none;"
| class="MainPageBG" style="width:55%; border:1px solid #cef2e0; background:#f5fffa; vertical-align:top; color:#000;" |
{| id="mp-left" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="width:100%; vertical-align:top; background:#f5fffa;"
| <h2 id="mp-dyk-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cef2e0; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3bfb1; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Article of the Now</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Article of the now}}</div>
|-
| <h2 id="mp-dyk-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cef2e0; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3bfb1; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">This Day in Christory</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Christory}}</div>
|-
| <h2 id="mp-dyk-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cef2e0; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3bfb1; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Did You Know...</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Did you know}}</div>
|}
| style="border:1px solid transparent;" |

| class="MainPageBG" style="width:45%; border:1px solid #cedff2; background:#f5faff; vertical-align:top;"|
{| id="mp-right" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="width:100%; vertical-align:top; background:#f5faff;"
| <h2 id="mp-otd-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cedff2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3b0bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Da Update</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Da update}}</div>
|-
| <h2 id="mp-otd-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cedff2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3b0bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">PSN Tracker</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{PSNTracker}}</div>
|-
| <h2 id="mp-otd-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cedff2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3b0bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">CWCki News</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{CWCki News}}</div>
|-
| <h2 id="mp-otd-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cedff2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3b0bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Improvement Project of the Now</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Improvement}}</div>
|}
|}
{| id="mp-lower" style="margin:4px 0 0 0; width:100%; background:none;"


| class="MainPageBG" style="width:55%; border:1px solid #ddcef2; background:#faf5ff; vertical-align:top;"|
{| id="mp-left" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="width:100%; vertical-align:top; background:#faf5ff;"
| <h2 id="mp-tfp-h2" style="margin:0; background:#ddcef2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #afa3bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Picture of the Now</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Picture of the now}}</div>
|}
| style="border:1px solid transparent;" |

| class="MainPageBG" style="width:45%; border:1px solid #ddcef2; background:#faf5ff; vertical-align:top;"|
{| id="mp-right" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="width:100%; vertical-align:top; background:#faf5ff;"
| <h2 id="mp-tfp-h2" style="margin:0; background:#ddcef2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #afa3bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em">Video of the Now</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Video of the now}}</div>
|}
|}


__NOTOC____NOEDITSECTION__

[[Category:Special]]

Random-access humor

2016-04-02T04:46:52Z

Alan Pardew: Just a minor grammar edit

: '''random access''' ''n.''
:: 1. ''(computing)'' type of storage access where arbitrary data can be accessed, as opposed to sequential access (q.v.). ''See also'' random access memory.
::''adj.''
:: 2. ''(CWCism)'' non-sequiturial; lacking any coherence.
: '''humor''' ''n.''
:: 1. Something funny.
:: 2. ''(CWCism)'' Something not funny, but which can be made funny when accessed randomly (q.v.). ''See'' random access.

[[Image:Wild_Snergen_Flergen.jpg|thumb|[[Wild Sonichu]] offers some uproarious random-access humor]]

'''Random-access humor''' is [[Christian Weston Chandler|Chris's]] [[CWC-isms|terminology]] for his tendency to blurt out whatever random thought enters his mind, regardless of its relevance to a given situation. More traditional literary analysts might describe this as the [[Wikipedia:Non sequitur (literary device)|literary device of ''non sequitur'']]. The "humor" part of the phrase stems from Chris's assumption that if he says something completely irrelevant and random, then it is automatically funny, which is a common fallacy among nerds and the mentally retarded. At this moment, the strongest portrayal of Chris's random-access humor can be found in his [[CWCFlyingElephants]] video.

Ironically enough, Chris's random-access humor is often [[Things Chris has ripped off|unoriginal]]. Jokes are mostly taken from [[Adult Swim]] shows, ''[[Monty Python|Monty Python's Flying Circus]]'', ''[[Family Guy]]'', or even shows like [[Wikipedia:Ed, Edd 'n Eddy|''Ed, Edd n Eddy'']] and [[Wikipedia:Samurai Pizza Cats|''Samurai Pizza Cats'']], making them completely out of context. He fails to understand the purpose of these jokes. For example, Monty Python's comedy was sculpted specifically to satirize British culture of their era and not simply random-for-the-sake-of-random. This shows that, even when Chris doesn't have to make any sense, he still has a hard time coming up with original material. When Chris ''is'' original, it's mostly in the form of childish rhymes or wordplays that would make [[wiki:Lewis Carroll|Lewis Carroll]] roll in his grave. This is due to Chris being a [[Autism papers|"somewhat concrete"]] thinker, having a tough time understanding abstract concepts (including humor). Because of his linear thinking, he has the tendency to take jokes literally (e.g. [[Bob]] told Chris a joke about [[Obama]] painting the White House black if he won the 2008 election).

One occasion of note is a line in [[Sonichu 2|''Sonichu'' #2]], wherein [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]], after being commanded to retreat, retorts with "You don't have to tell me twice! But during the stone age...". It's most likely that this is once again a stolen joke taken out of context, but Chris fails to realize that there is literally nothing to interpret as funny by any standard. This isn't too surprising, since Chris has never shown interest in clarity for the audience, and simply makes the comics for his own sake.

The randomosity is also questionable in that the allegedly random jokes are also frequently repeated; Chris keeps ''re-telling'' the same jokes that weren't funny in the first try. (For example, if you are a confused foreigner who has no idea what "Nantucket" is, ''you will Google it soon.'') Chris has specifically stated he actually fears things that are beyond his control,<ref>[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=User_talk:DariaCamacho User talk:DariaCamacho]</ref> a fear which falls nicely in line with [[autism]].

Chris also uses the term "random-access memory", which is basically when he says something completely random without the intent of being funny. He tends to use these when a conversation is not going in a direction he wants it to and hopes that interjecting this other thought-line will briefly distract him from seeing what a failure he is.

{{quote|Well, just like a computer, my brain is random. It picks up memories at random. I cannot simply access them sometimes, even though, most of the time, I can. But sometimes I can't, and they later come back to me at random.|Chris during the [[Father Call]], showing off his mad computer science and neuroscience skills}}

==Random ramblings==
[[File:DaftPunk.jpg|thumb|right|[[Hanky-panky|Chris is up all night to get lucky.]]]]

In November [[2007]], in a misguided attempt to help [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] to get to know him better and stop trolling him, Christian added the following to his ED page:

<blockquote>
----

Each Brain in every person in the world is a computer, complete with an InfiniteGB RAM...Emphasis on Random, and our [[Christian Weston Chandler|Autistic Hero]] is no exception. Here are some of his ramblings that can make him comparable to the TV-Talking-styles of those retarded robots, the [[Transformers Generation 1|Junkeons]]...

{{quote| -"Carrots are good for your eyes, can it dial a phone?"<ref>Originally said by Ed; originated from Ed Edd n Eddy episode [http://www.tv.com/ed-edd-n-eddy/one-plus-one-equals-ed/episode/117706/summary.html "One Plus One Equals Ed"]</ref>
 -"[[Autism_papers#MENTAL_STATUS_EXAM:|Uncle Spunky is a Funky Monkey]]."
 -"[[Yellow Is a Mellow Color]]."
 -"All aboard, here we go, let's go...somewhere else."
 -"[[CWCFlyingElephants|I once knew a man from Nantucket, and he had on his head a silly bucket.]]"
 -"I'm gonna call my lawer, his name is Tom Seywer, he has a daughter named Sue, who has been visiting her Uncle Sam for many years. Poor Tom."
 -"I knew a nose from the Pocanose, but then he ran away to Snotsvillvania."
 -"Quiet everybody, Emperor Fred has an announcement...FRED."<ref>From the US-dubbed version of Samurai Pizza Cats. Emperor Fred only said his name because he had " his wisdom teeth removed."</ref>
 -"[[BILLY MAYS|Call 'Right Now']], and we'll send you a beautiful girl to be your [[Sweetheart]], FREE. But you'd better call 'Right Now', or otherwise you'll get bupkis. And believe me, you do not want bupkis. Welcome to Bupkistown."
 -"Welcome to the Novelty Shop, this is [[Bob Chandler|Bob]], how can I help you?...Okay, we can do that."
 -"Well get out of here. What are you waiting on? I'm gonna chase you outta here."<ref>Originally said by Meatwad; originated from ''[[Aqua Teen Hunger Force]]'' episode [http://athf.frostillusions.net/transcripts/oldrippy.html "Ol' Drippy"]</ref>
 -"[[Flipnote Hatena|You've got a Hippo on your head.]]"
 -"[[Transformers]]. Robots on your head. Okay."
 -"I'm upside-down in a car, drivin' my way to the grocery store."<ref name="brak"> From [[Adult Swim|''The Brak Show'']] episode [http://members.fortunecity.com/brakshow/newbrak.html "The New Brak"]</ref>
 -"I have bow-ties on my feet, I must be walking with my neck."<ref name="brak"/>
 -"Root-de-do-de-do. Stop saying 'Root-de-do-de-do,' that's my bit, get your own. Oh, okay, how about 'Spling-ling, bling-ling, splee-de-de-le-deee?'"<ref name="brak"/>
 -"What? Pod six doesn't need a Pro Shop, they [[fangs|need a dentist]].<ref>''Sealab 2021'' episode "Legend of Baggy Pants" (Pod Six was another pod that was part of the lab. Captain Murphy referred to them as "[[JERKS|jerks]]")</ref>"
 -"Is this [[Wes Iseli|Walter Grisby]]? Who threw a frisbee? Well you know what?"

|Chris-Chan|}}

I Watch TOO MUCH FUCKING TELEVISION!!!
----
</blockquote>

== Sources ==
<references/>

==See also==
*[[Punchy Sonichu]] - A fighting electric hedgehog Pokémon who is explicitly stated to be the master of RAH, although, so far, he hasn't shown it.
*[[Monty Python]] - Actual masters of RAH, whom Chris unsuccessfully tried to emulate.
*[[CWCFlyingElephants]]
*[[I Got A Fish]]
*[[Bunny Hop]]
*[[Yellow is a Mellow Color]]
*[[Christian's Sex Joke]] - A staple of Chris's repertoire.

{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:CWC-isms]]

Main Page

2016-04-01T14:53:58Z

Alan Pardew:

Due to the request of ''Christine Weston Chandler'', this afternoon, '''we''' at the CWCki have independently decided to remove this main page from our site. We have also removed all references that '''slander, vilify, demean, found to be overly offensive, ableist, sexist and giving her emotional stress.''' In plain terms, this ordeal has gone on '''far too long''' and '''gotten far out of hand'''. We have unfairly focused on her to the point of intruding in her private life and causing her '''great personal grief, "''lonely, sad and depressed''", "''distressed and upset''", "''constantly hurt''", "''constant, zombie-like, blank''", "''lost''", "''in misery''", having the "''worst broken heart ever''"''' which no person should ever have to endure. This behavior is '''not in line with our site goals''', and we '''never wanted something like this'''. Still, we must take '''complete responsibility''' for all our actions, both '''public and private'''. And that is why we are speaking to you today. But we say to you now that at no time did we ask anyone to lie, hide, or destroy evidence, or to take any other unlawful action.

We know that her public comments on Facebook and her silence about this matter gave a false impression. We misled people, including even '''her family and her friends.''' We also reached to the point of having being overly obsessed with her, and we deeply regret that. We are also sorry for misgendering her as we receive a lot of backlash from various websites, one of them is r/GamerGhazi. We can only tell you we were motivated by many factors:

'''First''', by a desire to '''protect herself from the embarrassment of her own conduct.'''

She was also very concerned about '''protecting her family'''. According to her, if it wasn't for us for intruding her personal life, '''her father would have been alive today and we're deeply sorry for this.''' The investigation moved on to her family and friends, then into her private life. Because of this, we've reached the point of recently accusing her of shoplifting which we would like to apologise about this as well.

And now the investigation itself is under investigation. According to one of her friends, we've never '''''respected her and treated her like a human being''''' and we're deeply sorry for this as well.

This also has '''gone on too long, cost too much, and hurt too many innocent people.'''

Regardless of any public pressure to reinstate the main page, it must be stressed that our intrusion on Chris's private life will cease, and we intend to reclaim her family life for her family. Even Internet celebrities have private lives. '''It is time to stop the pursuit of personal destruction and the prying into private lives and get on with our national lives.''' Our website has been distracted by this matter for '''far too long''', and we take responsibility for our part in all of this. That is all we can do.

In the future, we're also in progress to sell off this website in order to monetarily compensate Chris as an apology for all of this -- this includes the forum too. Currently, another big box of stuff is on its way to be sent to Chris for all of this. We are currently in progress of having conversations with '''''The GAMe PLACe'', ''Mal-Wart'' and ''McDonalds'' employees''' who are working around his area to unban Chris and '''never ban her from anywhere else, ever.'''

We're also proceeding to take legal steps against the people who troll her -- which include, but not limited to:

*Adam Stackhouse
*Ahuviya Harel
*America
*Amud
*Andrew Dobson
*Anita Sarkeesian
*Anthony 'A-Log' Logatto
*Anna McLerran
*Anna Stackhouse
*Asperpedia Four
*Batman
*BILLY MAYS
*Blanca Weiss
*BlueSpike
*Brianna Wu
*Bryan Bash
*Chad Thundercock
*Charlottesville people
*Chris's High School Gal-pals
*Chris's Pastor
*Clyde Cash
*cogsdev
*Cole Smithey
*Connor Bible
*CoolDudeClem
*Coty Smith
*Crikey
*Daniel Mimms and Lucas White
*DarkSydePhil
*David Moyes
*DisneyFan01
*The Dodo Brain
*Dormiebasne
*Eli
*Emily
*Failosophy
*The GODDAMNED PINHEADS
*Gabe Navarro
*The GAMe PLACe
*Glaive
*GodJesus
*Google
*Homer Ruglia Beoulve
*Homos
*Ivy O'Neil
*Jace Connors
*Jack Thaddeus
*Jason Kendrick Howell
*Jay Geis
*Jenn the Tortoise-kin
*Jerkops
*Jimmy Hill
*John Langley
*Joshua Martinez
*Kacey Devoria
*Ken Penders
*Keurig Company
*The Lady Manager at Mal-Wart
*Lauren Faust
*Leonard F. Shaner Jr.
*Liquid Chris
*Lordsillynipples
*Louis Van Gaal
*Man in the Pickle Suit
*Mary Lee Walsh
*McDonalds employees
*Megan Schroeder
*Michael Snyder
*MylarBalloonFan
*MysteriousMrEnter
*Nathanael Greene Elementary School
*Null
*The Offline Cyberbully/Troll
*PandaHalo
*Peter Coffin
*Pixyteri
*Richard Heinz
*Rob Bell
*Robert Simmons V
*Robert Wayne Stiles
*Ruckersville people
*Sarah Anne Bevel Ingram
*Sarah Butts
*Sega
*Shigeru Miyamoto
*Sonic The Hedgehog
*Surfshack Tito
*Tara Strong
*Thorg
*TJChurch
*True Capitalist Radio
*Tyce Andrews
*Vade
*Vivian Gee
*Vivian James
*Wizardchan
*WogglebugLoveProductions
*Zoe Quinn

'''Now it is time''' -- in fact, '''it is past time to move on.''' We have important work to do -- '''real opportunities to seize, real problems to solve, real matters to face.'''

And so tonight, we ask you to turn away from the spectacle of the '''''past nine years''''', as we return our attention to all the challenges and all the promise of the next century. After all, to quote Chris herself:

{{quote|For you are not just dragging Christian Weston Chandler's name in the mud, you also drag the American hopes and dreams and ideas of the majority of these great, humble United States of America along with her.}}

We're deeply sorry for not only dragging the American Dream through the mud, but also slandering a true American patriot of proud, Anchuent Cherokian ancestry.

Thank you. And good night.

Main Page

2016-04-01T14:47:13Z

Alan Pardew: April Fool's

Due to the request of ''Christine Weston Chandler'', this afternoon, '''we''' at the CWCki have independently decided to remove this main page from our site. We have also removed all references that '''slander, vilify, demean, found to be overly offensive, ableist, sexist and giving her emotional stress.''' In plain terms, this ordeal has gone on '''far too long''' and '''gotten far out of hand'''. We have unfairly focused on her to the point of intruding in her private life and causing her '''great personal grief, "''lonely, sad and depressed''", "''distressed and upset''", "''constantly hurt''", "''constant, zombie-like, blank''", "''lost''", "''in misery''", having the "''worst broken heart ever''"''' which no person should ever have to endure. This behavior is '''not in line with our site goals''', and we '''never wanted something like this'''. Still, we must take '''complete responsibility''' for all our actions, both '''public and private'''. And that is why we are speaking to you today. But we say to you now that at no time did we ask anyone to lie, hide, or destroy evidence, or to take any other unlawful action.

We know that her public comments on Facebook and her silence about this matter gave a false impression. We misled people, including even '''her family and her friends.''' We also reached to the point of having being overly obsessed with her, and we deeply regret that. We are also sorry for misgendering her as we receive a lot of backlash from various websites, one of them is r/GamerGhazi. We can only tell you we were motivated by many factors:

'''First''', by a desire to '''protect herself from the embarrassment of her own conduct.'''

She was also very concerned about '''protecting her family'''. According to her, if it wasn't for us for intruding her personal life, '''her father would have been alive today and we're deeply sorry for this.''' The investigation moved on to her family and friends, then into her private life. Because of this, we've reached the point of recently accusing her of shoplifting which we would like to apologise about this as well.

And now the investigation itself is under investigation. According to one of her friends, we've never '''''respected her and treated her like a human being''''' and we're deeply sorry for this as well.

This also has '''gone on too long, cost too much, and hurt too many innocent people.'''

Regardless of any public pressure to reinstate the main page, it must be stressed that our intrusion on Chris's private life will cease, and we intend to reclaim her family life for her family. Even Internet celebrities have private lives. '''It is time to stop the pursuit of personal destruction and the prying into private lives and get on with our national lives.''' Our website has been distracted by this matter for '''far too long''', and we take responsibility for our part in all of this. That is all we can do.

In the future, we're also in progress to sell off this website in order to monetarily compensate Chris as an apology for all of this -- this includes the forum too. Currently, another big box of stuff is on its way to be sent to Chris for all of this. We are currently in progress of having conversations with '''''The GAMe PLACe'', ''Mal-Wart'' and ''McDonalds'' employees''' who are working around his area to unban Chris and '''never ban her from anywhere else, ever.'''

We're also proceeding to take legal steps against the people who troll her -- which include, but not limited to:

*Adam Stackhouse
*Ahuviya Harel
*America
*Amud
*Andrew Dobson
*Anita Sarkeesian
*Anthony 'A-Log' Logatto
*Anna McLerran
*Anna Stackhouse
*Asperpedia Four
*The Ballpit Forum
*Batman
*BILLY MAYS
*Blanca Weiss
*BlueSpike
*Brianna Wu
*Bryan Bash
*Chad Thundercock
*Charlottesville people
*Chris's High School Gal-pals
*Chris's Pastor
*Clyde Cash
*cogsdev
*Cole Smithey
*Connor Bible
*CoolDudeClem
*Coty Smith
*Daniel Mimms and Lucas White
*DarkSydePhil
*David Moyes
*DisneyFan01
*The Dodo Brain
*Dormiebasne
*Eli
*Emily
*Failosophy
*The GODDAMNED PINHEADS
*Gabe Navarro
*The GAMe PLACe
*Glaive
*GodJesus
*Google
*Homer Ruglia Beoulve
*Homos
*Ivy O'Neil
*Jace Connors
*Jack Thaddeus
*Jason Kendrick Howell
*Jay Geis
*Jenn the Tortoise-kin
*Jerkops
*Jimmy Hill
*John Langley
*Joshua Martinez
*Kacey Devoria
*Ken Penders
*Keurig Company
*The Lady Manager at Mal-Wart
*Lauren Faust
*Leonard F. Shaner Jr.
*Liquid Chris
*Lordsillynipples
*Louis Van Gaal
*Man in the Pickle Suit
*Mary Lee Walsh
*McDonalds employees
*Megan Schroeder
*Michael Snyder
*MylarBalloonFan
*MysteriousMrEnter
*Nathanael Greene Elementary School
*Null
*The Offline Cyberbully/Troll
*PandaHalo
*Peter Coffin
*Pixyteri
*Richard Heinz
*Rob Bell
*Robert Simmons V
*Robert Wayne Stiles
*Ruckersville people
*Sarah Anne Bevel Ingram
*Sarah Butts
*Sega
*Shigeru Miyamoto
*Sonic The Hedgehog
*Surfshack Tito
*Tara Strong
*Thorg
*TJChurch
*Tyce Andrews
*Vade
*Vivian Gee
*Wizardchan
*WogglebugLoveProductions
*Zoe Quinn

'''Now it is time''' -- in fact, '''it is past time to move on.''' We have important work to do -- '''real opportunities to seize, real problems to solve, real matters to face.'''

And so tonight, we ask you to turn away from the spectacle of the '''''past nine years''''', as we return our attention to all the challenges and all the promise of the next century. After all, to quote Chris herself:

{{quote|For you are not just dragging Christian Weston Chandler's name in the mud, you also drag the American hopes and dreams and ideas of the majority of these great, humble United States of America along with her.}}

We're deeply sorry for not only dragging the American Dream through the mud, but also slandering a true American patriot of proud, Anchuent Cherokian ancestry.

Thank you. And good night.

Saga

2015-09-03T12:46:35Z

Alan Pardew: Not enough to warrant a saga. And plus it doesn't have any huge events yet.

[[Image:Timeline.png|thumb|right]]
{{Quote|I've had online relationships in my past; most of which were good, but all of them ended not so good for me.|Chris makes the understatement of the century<ref>[[Sydney Kirsch]]</ref>}}

A '''saga''' (from the Old Norse ''sögur'') is an overall story arc of events.

In the world of [[Chris]], the term is used to describe an on-going trolling effort or other similar series of events that produces considerable drama over a period of time. Sometimes taking place over the course of months, other times taking place over the course of a few weeks. Since he was discovered online and found to have many hot buttons that made him susceptible to entrapment, Chris has been perpetually embroiled in some saga or other. More often than not, he is trapped in more than one saga at a time or found to be quickly jumping from the end of one to the beginning of the next. The term first came into widespread use with the [[Miyamoto Saga]] and has since been used to describe the overall events in a time period (similar to the term "dynasty").

The exact origin of the term "saga" being used to refer to these events in Chris's life is, as of yet, unknown. However, some argue that the usage may have originated with [[Vivian Gee]]'s [[audiobook]] project.

==List of Sagas: Pre-1st Exile==
===Megan Saga (''Summer 2005 - 18 March 2008'')===
[[Image:Megansagaheader.jpg]]
{{main|Megan Schroeder}}

The first and longest saga in the story of Christian Weston Chandler. From 2005 to 18 March 2008, this told the story of Chris and his longest and closest relationship with a girl, Megan Schroeder, leading into Chris's first encounter with [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] and Megan discovering the depths of Chris's madness. It began with a chance meeting at a ''[[Pokémon]] TCG'' League meeting at [[The GAMe PLACe]], which progressed into inappropriate touching and ended with shocking [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|hand-drawn pornography]] that was an embarrassment for all parties involved...excluding Chris.

===Adam Stackhouse Saga (''June 2007 - 4 August 2007'')===
[[Image:Adamsaga.jpg]]
{{main|Adam Stackhouse|Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown}}

In June 2007, Chris entered and attempted to win a contest in order to win Megan's heart, only to be beaten by a much superior entry made by Adam Stackhouse. The saga resulted in [[CWC is Angry|madman]]-style threats and [[PaRappa_contest#Aftermath|several angry e-mails and posts to contest organizers]]. Chris would rage for quite some time before deciding enough was enough. This was also the last time a saga was inadvertently caused by an unsuspecting member of the public. From this time on, [[trolls]] would control the content.

===ED Saga (''November 2007 - 14 April 2011'')===
[[Image:Edsaga.jpg]]
{{main|Encyclopedia Dramatica}}

In November 2007, trolls would discover Chris and put up the "Chris-Chan" page on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]. Chris would initially think that they just got information wrong, but as time would go on, Chris would reveal the true depths of his insanity, destroying his friendship with Megan Schroeder and becoming the epic lolcow we know him to be. Were it not for this article showing how susceptible he was to trolling and how [[Autism|divinely retarded]] he could be, Chris may have just been another dumbass with no life, and probably would have been more or less forgotten by now. To this day, ED remains a thorn in his side which he must constantly address to those new to his life. Further to this, he still maintains they are out to do him harm.

===Blanca Saga (''August 2008 - 21 October 2008'')===
[[Image:Blancasaga.jpg]]
{{main|Blanca Weiss}}

Around August 2008, Chris would meet Blanca Weiss, making her his first Internet sweetheart. Aside from being the first sweetheart, she also proved how [[Captain's Log, Stardate September 13th, 2008|tenacious and strange]] Chris could be about relationships, revealing several [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 9th, 2008|quirks and oddities that he felt were somehow appropriate to mention]] to someone he believed loved him. It also showed how useless any [[white knight]]ing efforts could be. In the span of two months, Blanca (actually three trolls working in tandem) would release the infamous pictures of Chris naked, then obtain and destroy Chris's [[medallions]].

===Jimmy Hill Saga (''mid/late 2008'')===
[[Image:Jimmyhillsaga.jpg]]
{{main|Jimmy Hill}}

At the same time Chris was dealing with Blanca, he was hit with another troll attack as he believed that a man known as Jimmy Hill was using the Sonichu name and character to make money off of him in Europe. The thought of someone making money from his true and original creation led him to [[Captain's Log, Stardate Columbus Day, 2008|stress out and provide proof]] of the [[Copyright|infringement]]. Those attacks would end around the same time the Blanca Saga ended.

===Clyde Cash Saga ''(December 2008 - ???)''===
[[Image:Clydesaga.jpg]]
{{main|Clyde Cash}}

In an attempt to get back at Chris for his [[Ryan Cash|brother's suicide]], Clyde Cash would go on a months-long trolling spree, going to great lengths to get back at the autistic wonder. The saga would result in the revelation of a [[The Miscreants|top secret organization]] hellbent on preventing the manchild from losing his virginity. It only ended with the apparent death of its creator.

However, in [[September 2009]] Chris resumed his war against Clyde Cash after discovering that he and another supposed troll, [[Gregg Mays]], were one and the same person. In the process, he made numerous videos attempting to blackmail the man, going so far as to mock a [[Twin Falling Towers|national tragedy]].

===PandaHalo Saga (''mid/late 2008 - February 2009'')===
[[Image:Pandasaga.jpg]]
{{main|PandaHalo}}

When Chris realized Blanca was a troll, he would move on to PandaHalo as his new sweetheart. The saga came to a quick and abrupt end when she was found to be bearing the child of Clyde Cash, conceived through rape. Unsurprisingly, Chris would quickly abandon Panda and she would (presumably) die in the Australian [[Brushfire Video|brushfires]], despite living miles away from the incident. She would end up giving trolls the [[Scrapbook of Fail]] and [[Slideshow]].

===Miyamoto Saga (''January 2009 - 10 February 2009'')===
[[Image:Miyamotosaga.jpg]]
{{main|Miyamoto Saga}}

In the beginning of January 2009, Chris would be confronted by <s>[[Clyde Cash|a troll]]</s> [[Shigeru Miyamoto]], who would attempt to try to make his ''Sonichu'' game fantasy a reality. Unfortunately, Chris proved to be nothing more than a couch potato and his ineptitude resulted in horrible delays and stalls to the project's advancement. In the end, [[Reggie Fils-Aimé]] shut down the entire project with a scathing letter. This trolling encounter would have Chris give trolls a PowerPoint project that talked in great length about [[Chris and his ego|himself]]...and very little about his game.

===Julie Saga (''February 2009 - March 2009'')===
[[Image:Juliesaga.jpg]]
{{main|Julie}}

In February 2009 to early March 2009, Chris's latest sweetheart would be Julie, who was in actuality a young troll named [[BlueSpike]]. In this brief timeframe, BlueSpike would release the infamous [[sex tape]] and then torture Chris in many ways in the infamous [[Julie Reveals Herself]] chat, where he force Chris to declare [[BILLY MAYS]] mayor of [[CWCville]] and destroy his second medallion by forcing him to stick it up his ass. However, BlueSpike's total and utter control over Chris would lead to a schism between trolls, leading to the creation of the [[PVCC (message board)|PVCC]] and this very wiki. BlueSpike still remains the most divisive of Chris's trolls.

===Ivy Saga (''March 2009 - July 2009'')===
[[Image:Ivysaga.jpg]]
{{main|Ivy}}

In March 2009, Chris would meet and fall in love with Ivy, his then-latest sweetheart. His crush towards Ivy would lead Chris to create 3 special comics and two music videos, a practical spurt of work that wouldn't be surpassed for awhile. The saga also revealed Chris at his [[I am devoted to My Sweetest Ivy|creepiest]] [[CWC's Message for Ivy|yet]], scarring many trolls and CWC-watchers. The saga also resulted in a [[CWC's ¨It's All Coming Back To Me¨|proposal of marriage]]. Despite the work spurt, the saga would come to an abrupt end thanks to a combination of troll interference from [[Joshua Martinez]] and interference from [[Bob Chandler]] and [[Rocky Shoemaker]], leading to Ivy's (fabricated) suicide.

===Vanessa Saga (''April 2009 - May 2009'')===
{{Incomplete}}
[[Image:Vanessa Saga.png]]
{{main|Vanessa Hudgens|Vanessa Saga}}

In [[April 2009]], Chris believed pop star, [[Vanessa Hudgens]] was in contact with him. Chris would create videos to show that he was movie-star material. [[Chris and reality|He was not]].

===Liquid Chris Saga (''June 21, 2009 - 10 November 2009'')===
[[Image:Liquidsaga.jpg]]
{{main|Liquid Chris}}

In July 2009, the TRUE and HONEST Christian Weston Chandler would come forth after the other Chris would reveal himself as a troll in one video. The other Chris, [[Ian Brandon Anderson]], would challenge Chris to a sing-off, with the TRUE and HONEST CWC proving himself the victor in the end. The appearance of this other Chris would pressure the other into churning out more comics than he had before, currently heading for the completion of [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], something that many believed would never happen due to the interference of many trolls.

Later, Liquid would return to continue on his quest to get rid of this faker. In the process of this new entry to the saga, Ian and Chris would battle over the heart of Chris's true love, [[Kacey]]. In the end, the real Chris would win out and marry Kacey, leaving Ian to be butthurt. Liquid's YouTube account would eventually close on 27 July, 2011.

===CWCipedia Saga (''4 May 2009 – 26 June 2010'')===
[[Image:The CWCipedia Saga.jpg]]
{{main|CWCipedia}}

In early June 2009, Chris was given the CWCipedia, a wiki-styled web page, so that Chris can use it to upload his ''Sonichu'' comics, blog, and personal life safe from the trolls who instantly dive at his other web pages and hack them. It doubled as a source for the [[CWCki]] to draw many of Chris's latest failures from, making it his best friend and his worst enemy.

On 19 [[November 2009]], perhaps one of the greatest features the wiki introduced was the [[Mailbag]], in which a dump of all [[fan]] e-mails sent to the admin's address could be answered by Chris, for all to see. This feature provided insight into how Chris responds to trolls through e-mail about his views on, for example, homosexuality, GodJesus, autism, etc.

Since 23 November 2009, advertisements linking to porn sites, gay rights organizations, information on Asperger's syndrome, and the [[Asperchu|Asperpedia]] took residence on the CWCipedia, paid for by trolls. Eventually, Alec, the creator of Asperchu, paid Jack Thaddeus to replace most, if not all, of the ads with ads for Asperpedia. Chris had [[Address to my Cwcipedia SysOp|complained]] [[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence|repeatedly]] to the SysOp of the Wiki about these ads, which would have paid for the site until the end of 2010, pending negotiations.<ref>http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=User_talk:ChrisChanSonichu</ref> All of this had "stressed" Chris out to the point of uploading videos of himself screaming [[death threats]] upon the advertisers' heads, and creating a separate, stress-free, ad-free front page.

This saga would lead to the site being shut down twice in a row, both due to copyright infringement, and would lead to the death of [[Simonla Rosechu]] in the most humiliating way - death by exploding toilet.

The Asperpedia team would continue to vandalize and hijack CWCipedia in a variety of ways until it finally collapsed in May, and Chris finally abandoned the site after already making numerous claims that he'd quit the Internet forever. After Mao moved in to fill the void, he passed ownership to [[Alec]] and [[Vivian Gee]], wherein they took over the site and the rights to Sonichu to begin ''Sonichu'' Season 2, where ultimately, on 26 [[June 2010]], the entire site would be terminated along with the entirety of the original 110mb server.

===Asperchu Saga (''November 2009 - 30 August 2011'')===
[[Image:The Asperchu Saga.jpg]]
{{main|Asperchu}}

In late November 2009, an artist named Alec Benson Leary started a new series called ''Asperchu'', starring the titular Electric Hedgehog Pokemon. Chris had spent most of December ignoring ''Asperchu'' and its popularity before finally exploding with rage, claiming the series as nothing more than fan fiction and a parody. The popularity of ''Asperchu'', combined with Chris's continuing downward spiral that is [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], has led many of Chris's fans to abandon ''Sonichu'' and go to ''Asperchu''.

Most of the saga has been spent with Chris raging at not just Alec, but also [[Evan]], Sean, and Asperpedia admin Mao over their usage of their characters and how they mock him. As well, Chris has been dealing with Evan over the usage of Simonla Rosechu, with Chris going so far as to deny reality and substitute it with his own.

In terms of productivity, it has given us ''Sonichu'' #10, which showcases Chris going all out in trying to get rid of everything he hates, including homosexuality and trolls. In that same book, Chris kills all four trolls involved in this saga as retaliation for making him kill Simonla Rosechu. Also, [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Calls|nine phone calls]] have been leaked. These phone calls show Alec attempting to get through to Chris and his way of thinking and Chris fighting tooth and nail not to change at all.

In the aftermath of the saga, Evan ceased his ''Simonchu'' comic, proud to have Simonla removed, Alec and Sean continued their respective comics, and Mao continues to poke and jab at Chris. And while the saga had for the most part died down, Asperpedia continued to harass its rival CWCipedia, either by placing new ads, vandalizing it, or shutting it down altogether. One of the post-trial ads even precipitated Chris's falling out with [[Jackie e-mails|Jackie]].

Alec Benson Leary would later be [[Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher|called out]] by Chris in 2011, and his identity was "revealed" as Christopher Paul Whitney, followed by Chris [[Chris and Health|sloppily devouring a cheap microwavable pizza]]. This later turned out to be fake as the ''real'' Christopher Paul Whitney made a response to Chris and essentially confirmed he was not Alec.

===Surfshack Tito Saga (''2 March 2010 - 10 August 2011'')===
[[Image:The Surfshack Tito Saga.jpg]]
{{Main|Surfshack Tito}}

Sometime in January 2010, Chris met and fell in love with [[The Wallflower]], hoping she would be the one who'd end his streak of being a [[virgin with rage]]. On 9 March 2010, Chris would release a ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]'' video of a stage based off a book he was helping write with his gal-pal...and release her name in the process. Dedicated trolls used the information to discover the gal-pal's identity, but decided to let the [[lulz]] spread naturally. The next day, however, a troll revealed the information to the gal-pal, and while one set of lulz was stopped, another one was set into motion.

The troll, calling himself Surfshack Tito, claimed responsibility for not only hacking his PSN accounts for the umpteenth time, but also stealing The Wallflower from Chris. Chris, in response, has threatened to go all out and seemingly try to murder Tito, threatening him with a [[pocket knife]], attacking him with [[Chris Drops the N-Bomb|racial slurs]], and flashing his [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|underwear]] in the process. At the same time, Chris has discovered and declared war on the CWCki, demanding that all pages involving himself, his friends and family be altered to suit his needs. To put it bluntly, Chris's attack on the CWCki fell utterly short.

The creativity here has been utterly stunted, especially after The Wallflower left him. He has gone on to blame his fans for wanting him to make more comics and compared them to the trolls that have tormented him. He has also vowed to leave the Internet forever, though he ended up reshowing his face 36 hours after his vow...

Echoes of this saga would be eventually heard in [[August 2011]] when, after announcing his glorious comeback to the Internet, Chris claimed to have discovered the true identity of Tito and tried to blackmail him using this information. Tito eventually [[Calling Out "Tito" - Don#Tito's official response|gave in]] to his demands on 9 August, which Chris [[Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|later acknowledged and accepted]].

=== The GAMe PLACe Saga (''pre-2005 - April 2013'')===
[[File:Game Place.jpg]]
{{main|The GAMe PLACe|Michael Snyder}}

For a long time, Chris had been visiting The GAMe PLACe on a regular basis. It was here that Chris would meet Megan herself, as well as [[Lucas]] and [[Mimms]], two people who would deliver a number of intel over Chris during his time there. He also participated in the ''[[Pokemon TCG]]'' League, using his own poorly made decks. However, Chris was a pain to the store's manager, [[Michael Snyder]] and by August 2008, tired of Chris terrorizing various [[niggos|patrons]], yelling at children, bogarting the TV and being an all-round pain, Michael would finally ban Chris from the store, embarrassing him and his mother in the process. It wouldn't be the end, however.

On multiple occasions, Chris returned to the store despite Michael's insistence that he never come back. He tried emails, sneaking in, [[Apology to Game & Hobby Place|pleading]] on [[YouTube]], but nothing worked. The first time he attempted (unsuccessfully, of course) to lift his ban in person was with a prepared, [[Chris and remorse|faux-apologetic speech]]. When that failed, he stormed out angrily and called Michael a [[Chris and race|JEW]], then attempted to rally his "fanbase" and get them [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|to troll him]]. [[6 June 2010|The next occasion]] was much more disturbing. He claimed he was trying to take a picture of Michael for a dartboard, but was caught in the act and was chased in the parking lot. Nearly running over Michael and his daughter, eventually the [[Jerkops]] got involved, but they did not arrest him. Michael accused him of trying to take [[pedofork|pictures of his daughter]]. Whether it's true or not, it's [[Kacey|confirmed]] that Chris has stalker tendencies.

The saga was revived in October 2011, when Chris and [[Barb|his mother]] visited the GAMe PLACe, and [[28 October 2011|an incident occurred]]. Exact details of events remain unknown, but charges such as assaulting a law enforcement official and property damage of more than $1000 were brought. Barbara was sentenced to community service and two years of probation. Chris was sentenced to community service, one year of probation, and mandatory [[Chris and Reality|psychiatric]] treatment and evaluation. They must also pay Michael Snyder's medical expenses.

Being the longest saga to date, it's little wonder why Barb believes it's at the center of all the trolling.

Finally, On 4 [[April 2013]], Chris posted on [[Facebook]], ''"I, Christian Weston Chandler, fully never ever, forever, want to have anything to do with the Game and Hobby PLace."'' It remains to be seen whether he will follow through. However, it could be a ''geinus'' plan to lull [[Michael Snyder]] into a false sense of security. It appears, however the saga may be over for good. At least for now.

==1st Exile Sagas==
===The CWC Exile Saga (''20 March 2010 - 29 August 2010'')===
[[File:Exile.jpg]]
{{main|Rocky Shoemaker|Fridays After Five|Flipnote Hatena}}

After Chris lost The Wallflower and fought with Surfshack Tito, an outside force attempted to push Chris away from the Internet. No less than five times, Chris has boldly claimed that he has abandoned the Internet and smugly told his detractors that they should go outside and live their lives, advice Chris should have followed ''years'' ago. However, Chris still latched onto the Internet as much as he could, trying to find ways to sneak in without the force discovering him.

Trolls would end up discovering Chris dancing like a dying turkey at [[Fridays After Five]], then discover that he had set up shop at [[Flipnote Hatena]], where he tried to spread his sick and twisted thoughts to younger, innocent people before being shut down. However, the thing that would finally bring Chris back to the Internet and end his exile would be [[The MovingForward videos|the destruction of his beloved Life Upgrade]]. At his own hands, no less!

==Post 1st Exile/Pre 2nd Exile==
===Jackie Saga (''April 5, 2010 - November 26, 2010'')===
[[Image:JackieSaga.jpg]]
{{main|Jackie}}

Following the fallout of The Wallflower incident, Chris pulled himself away from the Internet, only for him to meet and begin conversing to a woman named Jackie. Meeting her at [[The Hook Cafe|''The HooK'' Café]], the two began conversing through [[Jackie Emails|e-mails]], revealing the rationale in Chris's attempts to get back into The GAMe PLACe and showing [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|he's still incredibly disturbing]]. However, Chris broke off his relationship with her after she attempted to get him to change his life for the better.

Around [[September 2010]], Jackie and Chris were confirmed to have attempted to try again with a relationship, with Chris creating [[100_2265|even]] [[ECV 00002|more]] [[Pregnant Act|disturbing]] [[Don'tPintheOop|videos]] in the process. A third party--[[Lars]] McNulty, Jackie's ex-boyfriend--stepped in by the end of September, prompting Chris to release several videos attacking his newfound enemy. Video updates became increasingly bizarre, but still occurred regularly until the end of [[October 2010|October]].

By [[November 2010|November]], the leaked correspondence showed that Jackie was getting increasing impatient as Chris kept failing to fulfill her requests, while Chris made up a lot of lame excuses for why he could not deliver on them, all while continuously begging Jackie to have sex with him. On November 26, Jackie would send Chris the latest in a string of e-mails in which she criticized him for his laziness and unwillingness when it came to pay a more active part in relationships, and how he, despite of this, kept begging her for sex. Chris stopped responding at this point, putting an end to the saga.

===[[Tomgirl Saga]] (''28 April 2011 - ongoing'')===
[[Image:Cwctl.jpg]]
{{main|Tomgirl Saga|Tomgirl Pictures}}

In mid-2011, Chris's exile from the Internet continued, and his mental state deteriorated. Some leaked evidence of [[Wikipedia:Transvestitism|transvestitism]] surfaced in [[April 2011|April]], and he later joined the [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia]] forum, where his posts showed that Chris and sanity were only vague acquaintances. However, as of 2014, Chris is once again openly cross-dressing, against Barb's wishes.

===Call Out Saga (''06 August 2011 - 01 September 2011'')===
[[Image:Call_Out.png]]
{{main|Surfshack Tito (troll)|BlueSpike|Clyde Cash}}
{{incomplete}}
During the beginning of August, Chris began to release videos as an attempt to get some sort of reprisal out of the trolls. Chris warned the
trolls that if they didn't meet his demands on the deadline Chris had set for them, then Chris would leak information that he believed to be
true, even though most believe some of the information to be fake.

===Catherine Saga (''9 July 2014 - 14 December 2014'')===
[[File:catherinesaga.png]]
{{main|2014 Anonymous Sweetheart|Catherine E-mails|Catherine}}

With his newly acquired feminine wiles from his transition to Tomgirl, Chris managed to attract a Sweetheart who would be his first lesbian romance. In the summer of 2014, Chris would reveal he had found a new Sweetheart, whose identity he managed, surprisingly, to conceal for period of time. Later, he would [[I Love You, Catherine|reveal]] that her name was Catherine, which would suggest, due to the proximity between revelations, that the Anonymous Sweetheart had been Catherine all along. Predictably, Catherine turned out to be a troll, who revealed much about Chris having met with him twice. According to Catherine, his [[Catherine#The Date|behavior had not improved]] since the sexual harassment in the early days of the Megan Saga, and neither had the Chandlers's [[Rental House|comprehension of basic sanitation]]. In addition to Catherine's observation on her personal encounters, Chris also announced he had got a piercing on his [[Un-clit|perineum]], meaning this Saga provides some more detail on Chris's disturbing new features as a Tomgirl.

===Sonic Boom Saga (''3 September 2014 - present'')===
[[Image:SonicBoomSagaBanner.png]]
{{main|Sonic Boom Protests}}

This Saga began with Chris grumbling on [[Facebook]] about the announcement of the latest [[Sonic]] game, ''[[Wikipedia: Sonic Boom: Rise of Lyric|Sonic Boom]]''. Chris wasn't alone in his discontent; many of his Facebook friends expressed disapproval about the deteriorating quality of the Sonic games. What made Chris [[autism|unique]] in his irritation, is that the fact that Chris took umbrage at the fact Sonic's arms had been changed from flesh-colored to blue.

This baffled most of his white knights, with [[William Elliott Waterman]] trying to explain just how ludicrous Chris's demands to Sega to revert back to blue were, especially considering ''Sonic Boom'' was not part of the ''Sonic'' canon. The fact that Sega had no control in the design of Sonic's arms did not deter him and, thanks to his white knights who unwaveringly encouraged him, he began to protest. Initially, his protest against the "Blue-Armed Bandit" took the form of Facebook boycott groups, petitions, and [[Death Threats|angry messages]] on Sega Facebook pages.

On [[26 December 2014|Boxing Day]], however, this Saga came into bloom, culminating in Chris's second pending court case. Despite warnings from even his most loyal white knights, Chris had decided to take it upon himself to bring the protest into the real world. He went into his local GameStops and vandalized the display cases, including stores he had [[List of places that have banned Chris|previously been banned from]]. It was during his visit to one of these stores that had banned Chris that resulted in his arrest on Boxing Day. Chris had been seen and asked to leave by the [[manajerks|managment]]. After initially ignoring their requests he made his way towards the exist and, whilst on the way out, maced an employee, who had not been involved in his removal. As a result, Chris spent the weekend in jail, only to have Barb bail him out afterwards. After hearings on 5 [[February 2015]], 2 [[April 2015]], 7 [[May 2015]], and 11 [[June 2015]] Chris is currently awaiting another hearing in [[July 2015]].

Despite this, he continues to go on a tard rage over Sonic's blue arms, calling out Kengle because he owns a ''comic'' with blue-armed Sonic, sending glitterbombs to Sega, and buying a Sonic Boom doll just to rip its arms off.

==The Future==
If anything remains clear, it is that Chris is incapable of applying past events to current ones. Given this, it is likely that Chris will be enduring one saga or another until the day he dies.

==See also==
*''[[Excel Saga]]''

==References==
<references/>

[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category: Sagas]]

Barbara Chandler

2015-07-14T14:08:57Z

Alan Pardew: /* Pampering of Chris */ No.

{{DeadLinks}}
{{quote|I am close to my mother, but I would advise some space between you and your mother. And I recommend finding yourself a Girlfriend/Sweetheart to remain with in your later years of life. Mama's not gonna be around forever.|Chris gives advice to a ''Sonichu'' fan.<ref>[[Mailbag 13]]</ref>}}

{{quote|She threatens to kill me in her episode [sic] of emotional rage.|Chris on Barb.<ref name="jackie26">[[Jackie E-mails 26]]</ref>}}

{| class="infobox" style="width: 21em; font-size: 90%;"
|-
! colspan="2" | Chandler Family
|-
| colspan="2" | [[Image:0839-MomDesi.JPG|300px]]
|-
! colspan="2" |Barbara Chandler
|-
| '''Birth name'''
| Barbara Anne Weston
|-
| '''Nicknames'''
| Snorlax, Barb
|-
| '''D.O.B.'''
| [[Pre-1980#1940s|1 October 1941]] (age {{Age|1941|10|1}})
|-
| '''Gender'''
| Female
|-
| '''Nationality'''
| [[United States of America|American]]
|-
| '''Race'''
| White
|-
| '''Marriages'''
| [[Ran Coleman Yeatts]] (1961-19??) 
[[Bob|Robert Franklin Chandler Jr.]] (1980-2011)
|-
| '''Children'''
| [[Cole Smithey]]
[[Christian Weston Chandler]]
|-
| '''Occupation'''
| Office worker (retired)
|-
|}

'''Barbara Anne Weston Chandler'''<ref>[[Blanca E-mails#Chris likes Blanca|Email to Blanca]]</ref> (born 1 [[Wikipedia:1941#October|October 1941]]<ref>http://www.harveypowers.com/wynn/wynn/d155.html</ref>) is the widow of [[Bob Chandler]] and mother of [[Christian Weston Chandler]] and [[Cole Smithey]]. The sole recognition for her motherly qualities is the Mother of the Year [[2000]] Award Chris created for her.<ref>[[A Week With Christian Chandler#Page 13|A Week With Christian Chandler, page 13]]</ref> She has not won the award since.

==Family and early life==
Barbara is the fifth child (out of eight) of Joseph Otto "Joe" Weston (1896-1955) and Carrie Edna Wynn (1911-1967). They married in 1926, when Carrie was either 14 or 15 years old and Joseph [[Pedofork|was around 30]].<ref>http://www.harveypowers.com/wynn/wynn/d141.html#P141</ref> Barb's maternal grandfather was an alcoholic moonshiner, who carried out affairs and failed to provide even the most basic support for her mother's family.<ref>http://www.harveypowers.com/wynn/wynn/d118.html#P141</ref>

Chris stated in a leaked video that he and his mother are not liked by the members of the Weston family who have outlived [[Aunt Corrina]].<ref>[[Message for John Kyle]]</ref> It is not clear whether Chris meant to say that after Corrina's death all the Westons started hating him and his mother, or alternatively that by the time of Corrina's death no Weston other than her had a cordial relationship with Chris and Barb. Regardless of how this statement should be interpreted, it appears that Barbara's relationship with rest of her extended family is strained.

According to [[Facebook statuses|Facebook status]] Chris wrote on 30 [[January 2012]], Barbara lost her virginity at some point during her high school years.

Barb grew up in Red Oak, Virginia, and graduated from Randolph-Henry High School in Charlotte Court House, Virginia in 1960. While there, she was treasurer of her school's chapter of the Future Homemakers of America, a member of the Randolph-Henry bus patrol, a typist for her school yearbook The Log, and a member of the Spanish Club. She was also a member of many other school organizations, suggesting that she was very involved in extracurricular activities while in high school. She was also known for her perfect attendance record from her sophomore through her senior years of high school.

According to her senior yearbook, her nickname in high school was Bobcat.

===Cole and his various fathers===
[[Image:0467-CWC18th20.jpg|thumb|Cole visits for Chris's [[My big 18th party (story)|18th birthday]].]]

Barbara grew up and raised Chris's older half-brother [[Cole Smithey|Cole]] in Richmond, Virginia, near Virginia Commonwealth University and West Avenue.<ref name="Raising">[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#Raising Chris-Chan (16:46 - 00:00)]]</ref>

Barbara gave birth to Cole in 1963. Throughout his life, Barbara has lied to Cole about who his father is because she's [[Wikipedia:Maury Povich|Maury Povich]] trash.

Based on the experiences with his various stepfathers, Cole thinks that Barbara has a "proclivity to isolate herself via scurrilous mates."<ref name="coleemail2">[[:File:Cole 07-03-06-2.PNG|6 March 2007 email from Cole to Chris, page 2]]</ref>

====Jack Dale Smithey====
Barb insists that Cole's father is Jack Dale Smithey, to whom she claimed she was married, but records show she actually wasn't.<ref name="coleemail2" />

In 1995, an Internet post by a man claiming he was looking for his friend's absentee father, questioned the whereabouts of Jack Dale Smithey. According to the post, Smithey lived in Richmond in 1963 (the time Cole was born), and was a Merchant Marine. He later worked as a trucker for Pilot Trucking in North Carolina, but had not been heard of since 1964.<ref>http://archiver.rootsweb.ancestry.com/th/read/SURNAMES/1995-04/0798938259</ref>

Cole eventually hired a private detective who tracked down Jack Smithey in Sarasota, Florida.<ref name="Cole Smithey E-mails">[[Cole Smithey E-mails]]</ref>

====Ran Coleman Yeatts====
[[Image:RanColemanYeatts-WakeForestHowler1961.png|thumb|Cole's [[TRUE and HONEST]] biological father, Ran Coleman Yeatts, from the 1961 Wake Forest yearbook.]]

Records, which Cole later found after making a trip back to Richmond, show Barb married one Ran ''Cole''man Yeatts in 1961. Yeatts was from South Hill, Virginia, and was enrolled at Wake Forest College as late as 1960. He was scheduled to graduate in 1961, the year he and Barb married.<ref>http://www.archive.org/stream/howler1960wake/howler1960wake_djvu.txt</ref>

To further fuel Cole's rage, Yeatts would visit him and was introduced as a "friend" of the family when he was a child. <ref name="Cole Smithey E-mails" /> After Cole hired a private detective, Barbara hung up the phone on him when he called to ask about his father.<ref name="Cole Smithey E-mails" />

Yeatts died on 6 June 2007 in South Hill. His obituary made no mention of Cole and, curiously, none of Barbara either.<ref>http://web.archive.org/web/20130211071320/http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/timesdispatch/obituary.aspx?n=Ran-Yeatts&pid=88787372</ref>

====Jerry Harmon====
Jerry Harmon is Barbara's former lover and alleged sinister step-father of [[Cole Smithey]], Chris's older half-brother. Barbara claims to have married Jerry after her relationships with Jack Dale Smithey and Ran Coleman Yeatts. However, in the course of Cole's investigation into his family history, he was unable to find a marriage certificate.<ref name="Cole Smithey E-mails" />

{{quote|I grew up in an abusive household with Barbara and my former stepfather Jerry, where physical and mental punishments ran the gambit from bare-assed beatings to cold showers to bizarre scenarios acted out with glee by two deeply neurotic adults... Even at a very young age, I knew that they would abandon me. They were both irresponsible and incompetent parents who exposed me to traumas that I would rather not remember.|Cole on Barb and Jerry's parenting skills.<ref name="Cole Smithey E-mails" />}}
{{-}}

In his article [[Saturday Night Special]], Cole would further elaborate about his first step-father. According to Cole, Jerry was a professional magician who lived with Barbara in a second-floor apartment adjacent to the campus of Virginia Commonwealth University in Richmond. Jerry allegedly kept a gun in his nightstand drawer, which his stepson would play with, and was out cheating on his wife when an intruder came to the apartment, leaving Barb to have to fire the gun to scare them off. The shot ricocheted and nearly killed Cole as a result, hitting the wall a hair's breadth behind his head.

===Marriage with Bob===
[[Image:0033-MommasBirthday.jpg|thumb|She never was much of a looker.]]

Bob and Barbara met in a bar on a karaoke night. Barbara was there with friends and Bob was singing.<ref name="Mumble 3.5">[[Mumble 3.5]]</ref> Cole's friend Chuck, who worked at the bar, has a vivid memory of them being drunk retards.<ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-07-24-1.PNG|24 July 2007 email #1 from Cole to Chris]]</ref> According to Chris, Barbara did the [[How to Talk to Girls|pursuing]]: "She chased him down the hall." They got married in 1980.<ref name="Mumble 3.5" />

According to Chris, Barbara had not had sex with Bob for at least two decades before his death. They had been sleeping in separate rooms for the past few years.<ref>[[IRC (27 December 2008)]]</ref>

On September 1992, Chris and Bob moved from Ruckserville to Chesterfield County.<ref>[[Chris's Wikipedia profile#His Early Years - Birth to 1992]]</ref> Barbara did not accompany them, but rather stayed in in their old home. Chris claimed that the separation allowed Barbara to continue working at her job with Virginia Power until retirement, and that she still visited Bob and Chris on every weekend during the time she lived separately from them. After going into retirement when Chris was in the eighth grade (in early 1996), Barbara came to live with her husband and son in Chesterfield.<ref>[[Mailbag 32#Chris is no stranger to stupid name changes]]</ref><ref>[[:Image:0078-CWCNote2.jpg]]</ref>

With both Barbara and Bob retired, they resided with Chris in their Ruckersville home. It is difficult to ascertain what their relationship was like, but sources such as the tour of the house would suggest that Chris's parents neglected the family home and spent most of their time apart in separate areas of the house.

Barbara became a widow on 6 September 2011 when Bob died.<ref name="BobObit">http://web.archive.org/web/20130211071324/http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/dailyprogress/obituary.aspx?n=robert-franklin-chandler&pid=153539600</ref>
{{-}}
<center>
<gallery>
File:Parenting Interview 001.jpg|Barb and Bob's answers on a parenting quiz
File:Parenting Interview 002.jpg|Barb and Bob's answers on a parenting quiz
</gallery>
</center>

===Pampering of Chris===

{{quote|Yeah, but then my Mom is pretty much jealous of me loving another woman more than her.|Chris, describing his [[Wikipedia:Oedipus complex|Oedipus complex]].<ref>[[Mumble 10]]</ref>}}

[[Image:0028-ChristopherWMom1.jpg|thumb|Barbara evolved into Snorlax as she raised Chris.]]
[[Image:ImWorkingOnIt.png|thumb|left|Chris and Barbara in an intimate moment.]]

According to Cole, Bob and Barbara left Chris alone every day for years with the [[abusive babysitter]] while going out drinking, effectively ignoring the onset of the earliest symptoms of autism.<ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-3.PNG|6 March 2007 email from Cole to Chris, page 3]]</ref> After Chris's initial diagnosis, and after their negligence was inevitably thrown back in their face, Barbara resorted to any means necessary to coax Chris into talking, most notoriously by bribing him with toys.<ref>[[Song of Christian]]</ref>

While both Chris's parents are largely responsible for Chris's current state, Barb has more often than not been the most active in protecting Chris from recognizing any failure or shortcoming on his part, doing everything from being his sole commission with [[Cutco]] to going as his date to his [[Manchester High School#The Seinor Prom|seinor [sic] prom]].<ref>[[Cutco]]</ref>

This pattern of accountability continues even into Chris's adult years. On at least two occasions, most notably after he was banned for good, Barbara visited [[the GAMe PLACe]] attempting to protect and defend her little snowflake and argue his case with [[Michael Snyder]], but to no avail.

As first evidenced by the "GAMe PLACe/4Chan picture" incident, she is extremely paranoid regarding Chris's online misadventures, likely because she fears that he'll [[Jerkhief|get]] [[Bagget|arrested]] and [[28 October 2011|go to prison]]. Given some of the violent states of some of his videos and Chris's [[Arrest|track record]], she's probably not too far from the truth. She may also suspect that Chris is a [[pedofork|pedophile]], as she [[Mumble 10| thought it was possible that he may have fallen for a ''To Catch A Predator''-esque sting operation]] during the [[Julie]] fiasco. She even seems to suspect that [[Megan Schroeder]], one of the few women Chris has known who ''wasn't'' out to troll him, is partially responsible for the persecution he has endured over the years. She does her part to keep his activities under control by acting as Chris's personal concierge, as seen when she interrogated [[Ivy]] for about half an hour before letting her speak to Chris.<ref name="IvyQ&A">[[Ivy Q&A]]</ref>

Barbara constantly babies Chris and tells him how handsome he is.<ref>[[Sonichu Girls]] and [[White knight emails]]</ref> She also told Chris that the reason he often "blanks out" or gets confused isn't that he's a lazy dumbass, but that he's a "[[Chris and art|creative genius]] and is simply overwhelmed by having so many creative ideas".<ref>[[Kacey Call 12]]</ref>

However, it seems that even Barb has her limits. Like Bob, she was [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia#Re: Coming out to my parents|ashamed of Chris's effeminate escapades]], claiming that she didn't raise a daughter, and that "tomgirl" is not a thing. [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia#Re: Mothers|She tried and failed]] to get Chris to stop wearing a bra and panties, even offering to pay him to stop.

It appears that Chris's diet doesn't worry Barb too much. In the night after the Chandler family moved back to Ruckersville, Bob and Chris refused a spaghetti dinner offered by Barb. As a response, Barb decided to forego cooking for her family and hasn't made a meal for Chris until January 2015. <ref>See emails sent by [[Jackie E-mails 24|Chris to Jackie on 24 and 26 April 2011]].</ref>

To cap off their relationship, Chris allegedly revealed in private conversations that Barbara NEVER HAS occasionally spooned with her. <ref>[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GxGU4nSlX0M ''PVCC NEW info: on Chris and Barbara spoon eachother!'' (YouTube)]</ref>

==Health problems==
===Physical===
[[Image:Cheers01.jpg|thumb|Artist's depiction.]]
[[File:Barb.PNG|thumb|left|''Arrangement in Pink and Purple: The Autist's Mother'']]

Like Chris, Barbara has been [[obesity|obese]]. As little as ten years ago Barbara was reasonably slim, but, along with Chris, ballooned out in more recent years, to the point of resembling an American [[Wikipedia:Rose West|Rose West]]. Her massive size earned her the affectionate nickname '''Snorlax''' from the [[trolls]]. Barb's size may have led to her [[stress|sleeping a lot]]<ref>[[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.7]]</ref> and usually skipping [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|church]].<ref>[[Church audio]]</ref>

In [[October 2009]], Barbara spent her birthday at the hospital with what the Chandlers thought was food poisoning.<ref name="9 October 2009">[[9 October 2009]]</ref> Barbara was diagnosed with [[Wikipedia:Colitis|colitis]], a gastrointestinal disease characterized by the inflammation of the colon. It manifests in diarrhea and cramps. Which kind of colitis has yet to be determined. It seems the Chandler family's diet has finally come to affect her, and in order to survive she will have to change her eating habits; considering their stubbornness, this clearly will end badly.

Hearing the plight of the Chandler family, [[Trolls|fans]] of Sonichu have created the website "Barbara Chandler Has AIDS" to spread awareness regarding AIDS and to collect donations for research foundations and charities.<ref>[http://sites.google.com/site/barbarachandlerhasaids/home "Barbara Chandler Has AIDS" Awareness Website]</ref> Chris himself denied his mom has AIDS.<ref name="9 October 2009"/>

According to eyewitness reports, Barbara lost weight in 2012.<ref>[[This is how the Trial went‎]]</ref> Her weight loss is visible in photos Chris took of her at a 2012 Mythbusters tour stop in Washington, DC.<ref>[[:File:BarbMarch2012.png]]</ref>

In a [[Twitter|tweet]] to Cole from June 29, 2013, Chris tells him that "[he] ought to be over here putting bandages on [their] Mom's holey buttocks." It was not clear exactly what sort of problem this referred to, though it didn't sound pleasant. On October 14, 2013, Chris elaborated in a Facebook post, stating, "my mother stresses me with her continuous rants about her damn miniature scabie flies, her suffering, the low finances and shit!!!" Consensus was that the so called "holey buttocks" were in fact lesions. It is now believed that Barb currently has a colony of parasitic mites (rather than flies) that have burrowed into her bountiful booty. Naturally, while Barb is being eaten alive, Chris whines about having to take care of her.

On 23 August 2013 Chris revealed that Barbara had been afflicted with breast cancer but managed to survive.<ref>[[Facebook#Breast Cancer Awareness]]</ref> He did not give details about when was she diagnosed with the ailment, at what stage it was and what kind of treatment was Barb given.

As of June 2014, Barbara was still able to walk at least short distances, and was much slimmer than she had been in the past, no longer the morbidly obese blob that she was several years prior. As of June 2014, her posture and movement suggested that she suffered from osteoarthritis, or some other joint problem. Also, her legs and arms were quite thin and stick-like, as if her muscles had been wasting away from lack of use. This information suggested that Barbara's physical health was continuing to decline as of June 2014. {{cite}}

By August 2014, Chris was again begging for money on [[Facebook]], [[Lego|supposedly]] to pay dental fees, as his mother had cavities in her teeth which needed treatment.

In February 2015, she was filmed leaving a courtroom after Chris's hearing due to his [[Sonic Boom Protests|macing]], where she appears to have low muscle mass (probably due to her sedentary lifestyle), and, though still [[obese]], has, in fact slimmed down into a Munchlax.

===Mental===
During the [[Ivy]] Saga, Barb threatened to her family that she might commit suicide, as a response to the stress she was going through.<ref name="IvyQ&A"/>

Chris labels Barb a "pack rat"<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref>; however, "hoarder" may be a more appropriate title. Barb compulsively hoards her purchases, which helped make the living room uninhabitable, and generally turn [[14 Branchland Court]] into the fire- and biohazard it is - or rather, [[Destruction Of Chris's House|was]].<ref>[[Tour of Chris's House]]</ref> When Bob was admitted to the hospital for the final time, he was quarantined for bug bites, obstensibly due to the conditions at the Chandler house. <ref>[[Rocky Shoemaker call]]</ref>

In a May 17, 2011 email to [[Jackie]], Chris claimed that his mother flew into a rage over his [[Tomgirl]] inclinations, forcing him to submit to a haircut and threatening to kill him.<ref name="jackie26" />

==Legal problems==
On [[28 October 2011]], Chris and Barb were caught in an incident with [[The GAMe PLACe]], and were actually arrested with several serious charges, with Barb's including felony assault and failure to stop. The two were later released on bail. After a succession of court hearings, Barb, along with her son, was arraigned on her felony charges on 10 July 2012. She was sentenced to community service and was put under a two-year probation, as well as being ordered to pay Michael Snyder's medical bills. When informed of the latter fact during the trial, Chris explained that his mother, a retired, obese, seventy-year-old woman, would take care of the charges for him. No one was particularly surprised at this revelation.

==Appearances==
===In ''Sonichu''===
[[File:Bc.PNG|thumb|Chris gets to live out his fantasy of being (and having) an adequate son.]]

In [[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]], Barbara makes a brief appearance in "Classic Sonichu Strips".

In [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], the male [[Dating education#In Sonichu|Dating Education]] students are given Barbara dolls to talk to.

According to the [[CWCipedia]], [[Sandy Rosechu]] and [[Sonichu and Rosechu's children]] go to Anneweston Elementary School.<ref>[[CWCipedia]] on [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Wild_Sonichu Wild Sonichu]</ref> It is unknown whether or not Sonichu and Rosechu's children still go that school after their [[Sonichu and Rosechu's children#Sonichu and Rosechu's children|evolution]].

===Audio===
* Private Skype chat with [[Sarah May]].
* 4 [[February 2009]], [[Mumble 2]]: Barbara denies singing while vacuuming Chris's [[room]].
* 17 [[February 2009]], [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 2]]: Barbara talks to Chris but when Julie wants to talk to her, Barbara says she isn't "able to talk to anybody right now."
* [[March 2009]]: Barbara takes over the phone from Chris when Clyde [[Clyde#Prostitutes|calls after the date with Emily]].
* [[Kacey Call 15]]: Chris keeps [[Kacey]] on the phone for nearly fourteen minutes while Barb talks about the value of [[Chris and his Ego|humility]], her poor health, and her relationship with Bob, among other things.
* [[November 2009]], [[Kacey and Liquid Call]]: Barbara tells Chris to "just hang up on the bitch!"
* 10 [[August 2010]], [[Matthew Noble call]]: Barbara claims that Megan "lied" to Chris and abruptly hangs up mid-sentence. Throughout the call, she can be heard denying that she and Bob are the slightest bit in the wrong. At one point she complains about the time Michael Snyder kicked her and Chris out of the GAMe PLACe following Chris's final ban from the store.
* [[Prank calls]]: Barbara yells in the background and foreground of several prank calls.

===Videos===
Barbara has appeared in five videos to date as of [[February 2015]]: off-camera in the [[Christian Weston Chandler Interview]], and on-camera (for the first time) in [[You're Always Pretty]]. [[ChandlerFamilyChristmas2004|Two decade-old videos]] were leaked in December 2014 showing the Chandlers celebrating Christmas. Another video of her was recorded by a [[troll]] as she and Chris left court after his hearing in February 2015.
{{-}}

==Gallery==

<center>
<gallery>
Image:Babs1956.PNG|Barb's 8th grade photo.
Image:Babs1957.PNG|Barb's freshman photo from high school.
Image:Babs1960.PNG|Barb's senior photo from high school.
Image:0002-1-Baby Chris and Mommy.jpg|Barbara with baby Chris. Oh, how full of hope and promise.
Image:0027-ChristopherWMom2.jpg|"Talk, you little idiot!"
Image:0026-ChrisAndMom.jpg
Image:0107-ChristianWMom.jpg|This is when [[The Simpsons]] went downhill.
Image:0063-BobAndBarbaraNewLife.jpg
Image:0096-MomRetire4.jpg|Barbara's retirement party from secretarial services at Virginia Power in 1996.<ref>[[:Image:0078-CWCNote2.jpg|DVD, note 2]]</ref>
Image:0029-BarbaraWithDrinks.jpg
Image:0113-MomsBirthday97-1.jpg|From her 55th birthday.
Image:0229-ChristianAndMomInClass.jpg
Image:0037-BarbaraInGreen.jpg|Nothing says the 80s like a woman in a power suit and a lady tie.
Image:0041-BarbaraCorinaTomAndHerriet.jpg|Barb with [[Aunt Corrina]], Uncle Tom, and Aunt Harriet.
Image:0042-BarbaraCorinaHerrietAndElvis.jpg|The King left the building when he started to notice the foul smell of the Chandler house.
Image:0618-BarbaraIs60-1.jpg|Poor Barb, Chris put [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] on HER birthday cake.
Image:0074-BarbaraWSonicDoll.jpg
Image:0540-Prom2.jpg|It was originally believed this image was from Chris's graduation. Turns out this is from his senior prom, where he took his mom as his date.
Image:0549-Prom11.jpg|Barb, talking to [[Tiffany Gowen|Tiffany]], one of Chris's [[gal pals]], at the prom.
Image:Babura.PNG|Barb [[You're Always Pretty|is always pretty]].
BarbMarch2012.png|Barb in 2012, having devolved from a Snorlax into a Munchlax.
File:SnoopyDoobieDoo.png|With [[Snoopy]] in [[2013]].
File:LegoSnorlax.jpg|As [[Chris]] sees her in [[Lego]] form
</gallery>
</center>

==Sources==
<references/>

==External links==
*<s>[http://www.megaupload.com/?d=ZTK7XM3N GET OFF BEFORE I GO OFF]</s> DELETED

{{People}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Chandler, Barbara}}
[[Category:Family Members]]

Talk:List of Chris's edits to the CWCki

2015-06-22T13:58:11Z

Alan Pardew: /* Regarding the recent edits */ new section

IP check confirmed it. It's him, doing a backbreaking three edits thinking that's a huge fucking threat. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 23:22, 2 April 2010 (UTC)
* I have the content of his edits saved onto some word documents. Should we make a table, like the one the [[Twitter]] article has? --'''[[User:Lime|L]][[User_talk:Lime|i]][[Special:Contributions/Lime|m]][[nudes|e]]''' [[Image:Madotsuki.png]] 23:51, 2 April 2010 (UTC)
** just look at the list of ED edits page and copy that format i guess[[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 23:56, 2 April 2010 (UTC)
*** Got it. I'll work on it right now. --'''[[User:Lime|L]][[User_talk:Lime|i]][[Special:Contributions/Lime|m]][[nudes|e]]''' [[Image:Madotsuki.png]] 00:10, 3 April 2010 (UTC)

I think it's worth mentioning he tried to Wiki-link [[brilliant]]. The word. Like I just did. How to do so without overemphasizing it eludes me, sadly.--[[User:OFSheep|OFSheep]] 03:48, 3 April 2010 (UTC)

*Today (19 August 2010), some bloke edited Clyde's page using a screen name looking like Chris's. Can anyone run a IP check on this? [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 12:00, 19 August 2010 (PDT)
:*I'm going to call troll on this.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 13:43, 19 August 2010 (PDT)

== Bought with taxpayers money? ==

I'm not sure if I can see the logic of putting this article in the category "Things bought with taxpayers money". Is it because Chris edited the CWCki while using his internet connection (which is probably paid at least partially by the tugbaot) or does the inclusion follows some other reasoning? - [[User:NegaCWC|NegaCWC]] 07:32, 24 February 2012 (PST)
:It's because the Tugboat template was added by Chris to the [[Coffee Place]] article. I tried replacing the template with the wikicode from its template page, but it seems to break the quote box. I can't think of another way to remove the tag, though. —Preceding [[Wikipedia:Signatures|unsigned]] comment added by [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] ([[User talk:Freecell|talk]] • [[Special:Contributions/Freecell|contribs]]) 11:31, 24 February 2012 (PST)
::I'm considering the possibility of creating a duplicate template that has the appearance of the tugboat template but without the category to use specifically in this article, though. Not sure if it's worth going through that effort just to keep the category off this page. Any thoughts? --[[User:T K 19|T K 19]] 12:07, 24 February 2012 (PST)
:::I decided against it because I was sure there was an easier way, but I still can't get it to work, so maybe that's the best solution after all. I guess we might as well. If there's a simpler solution, we can replace it later. —Preceding [[Wikipedia:Signatures|unsigned]] comment added by [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] ([[User talk:Freecell|talk]] • [[Special:Contributions/Freecell|contribs]]) 12:12, 24 February 2012 (PST)

== Regarding the recent edits ==

Apparently the user's IP is from Central PA. [[User:Alan Pardew|Alan Pardew]] ([[User talk:Alan Pardew|talk]]) 13:58, 22 June 2015 (UTC)

List of Chris's edits to the CWCki

2015-06-22T08:42:49Z

Alan Pardew: No it doesn't. It's more of a weening and right now we should wait until a confirmation happens.

[[File:Chrisshotweb.jpg|thumb|Summary of the incident.]]
After Chris discovered the [[CWCki]] in [[March 2010]], he [[CWC Blog#14 March 2010|demanded]] that pages related to his family and [[gal pals]] be removed, giving two deadlines. Around midnight on [[April 2010|1 April]], past the second deadline, he decided to attack CWCki, signing up as [[User:GodofThunderGodofWar|GodofThunderGodofWar]]. In true CWC style, his [[Special:Contributions/GodofThunderGodofWar|vandalism]] was less than impressive. In fact, since he made them on April Fools' Day, many users just assumed that it was an elaborate and lulzy prank on the part of the administrators. But no, it was f'real. Christian vandalized the CWCki's articles to make them look as if they are praising him. As usual Chris's [[Chris and English|tenuous grasp of grammar]] made his edits stand out like a sore thumb.

Chris later returned under the guise of [[User:JenkinsJinkies|JenkinsJinkies]], making several posts from 5 [[May 2010]] to 13 [[July 2010]]. Chris returned again about a year later as [[User:Christianchandler|Christianchandler]] on [[November 2011|4 November 2011]], part of the [[28 October 2011]] aftermath. He uploaded three pictures of [[Michael Snyder]].

Although Chris originally demanded that the CWCki's administrators only edit or remove pages related to his friends and family, it is perhaps telling that when he finally set himself to actively vandalizing the site, he ignored those pages, choosing instead to make edits [[Chris and his Ego|glorifying himself]].

Listed below are all of Chris's edits made on his accounts, unedited by trolls and exactly as he wrote them. An exception is made for headings, which are replaced with '''bold text''' in the quoteboxes.

==GodofThunderGodofWar==

[[Special:Contributions/GodofThunderGodofWar|All edits]]

===1 April, 12:35===
His first action was editing the Did You Know? column, removing the majority of the factoids while adding a few of his own, most of which were merely rewrites of existing comments. Hilariously, he begins to glorify himself only ''after'' stating "The CWCki is a LOAD OF BULL", effectively nullifying his own attempts.

{{quotebox|
*...This webiste, the CWCki, is a LOAD OF BULL?
*...that Christian Chandler ALWAYS IS the mayor of [[CWCville]]?
*...that [[Pixelblocks]] are not to be confused with neither [[Pickles|Pickleblocks]] nor [[Prickly-Wicklies|Pricklyblocks]]?
*...that Chris buys healthy food, good drinks and just necessities with Good Money?
*...that Chris has been recording himself as early as [[Manchester High School|10th grade]]?
}}

The following comments however, were left untouched.

{{quotebox|
*...that a [[Curse-ye-ham-ye-ha Retraction|Forgiveness blessing]] can counter the extreme bad luck and misfortune associated with the [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]] attack?
*...that [[Chris]]'s sense of humor is [[Random-access humor|SO RANDOM XDXD]]?
*...that Chris is the [[The Game Place#Chris.27s_antics|Level Up King]]?
*...that [[Virginia is for Virgins]]?
*...that Chris really likes [[Britney Spears]] (no matter what they all say)?
:*...that his favorite song from "[[:Image:CWCSchuBrit.jpg|Air Britney]]" is ''[E-Mail My Heart]''?*
*...that Chris is a descendant of [[Anne Boleyn]], Queen of England?
}}

Some of the factoids were likely left alone because Chris failed to [[Autism|notice their sarcasm]] and mistook them for compliments. [[Naïve|On a troll site]]. It should also be noted that the Pixelblocks factoid was also untouched, save for Chris adding the word "not" in the middle. It was likely that he perceived it to be a spelling mistake and decided to correct it, even though the word "neither" instead of "either" later in the sentence causes Chris to [[Chris and English|''add'' a mistake instead]]. Chris finally relinked [[Song of Christian]] to "10th grade", a broken link.

*Altered for this article. This normally links to a [[YouTube]] video, but external links mess up the quoteboxes.

===1 April, 12:42===
Chris then changed the "Article of the Now" from [[Ian Brandon Anderson]] to himself.

{{quotebox|
[[Image:0782-CWCSpread.JPG|right|200px|lolwut.]]

'''Christian Weston Chandler''' (born '''Christopher Weston Chandler''' on 24 February [[1982]]) is a [[autism|high-functioning autistic]] [[virgin with rage|virgin]], Honest, Cool and Honest Dude, and creator of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]], a [[brilliant]] character, starring in his own self-titled [[Sonichu (comic)|online comic book]].

His adult life has been largely defined by his goal of most Normal Human Beings; Finding their Meaning of Existence, Their True Love, Their own Self-Character. No One should ever interfere or ever make a mockery of such a tride and true quest to finding HIS own Happiness with his WOMAN who is to be his Wife.

Yes, friends, it gets far sweeter.
}}

This edit is perhaps the most condensed essence of Christian to ever emerge in pseudo-paragraph format. Between the utter butchery of the English language, blatant ego stroking, and unintentional creepiness ("Yes, friends, it gets far sweeter"), Christian pretty much sums up what legions of trolls have spent nearly half a decade trying to record for the world. Also note that, while on a website dedicated to trolling him, he still attempts to insert links to other parts of the wiki. In all likelihood, Chris planned to vandalize these elements as well but stopped due to [[stress]]. In the original edit, the link "brilliant" linked instead to the Fail page. Much like the 10th grade link example above, Chris removed this part and created a red link.

===1 April, 12:44===
A couple of minutes after, he made the infamous [[CWCRockin4Way.jpg]] the Picture of the Now.

{{quotebox|[[Image:CWCRockin4Way.jpg|300px|left|lolwut?]]

A recently leaked image shows an illustration by [[Chris]] having [[Sweet, Sweet Sex]] with three young women, including a white one, a black one, and one in-between.Chocolate-Vanilla Swirls!!! YAY! 8D}}

Not much needs saying here. Chris chose the image and added some [[random-access humor]]. Why this image? Nobody knows. Also, the red link this time was actually put in entirely by Chris himself, rather than being another unintentional mistake. Why he thought the CWCki would have a page on "Sweet, Sweet Sex" is anyone's guess.

==JenkinsJinkies==

[[Special:Contributions/JenkinsJinkies|All edits]]

===5 May, 01:08===
In his first edit on the new account, Chris commented on [[PS3/How the PS3 is Hacked|the hacking]] of the [[PS3]], saying the supposed bug was just an antenna. However, later that day he tore out the antenna anyway, just to be safe.<ref>[[I Pimp My Ride.MOV]]</ref>

{{quotebox|
'''Dude, Really? That's an Antenna'''

I trolled around and found it. http://www.eeshops.com/ps3-wifi-antenna-tyco-19039281-w400-p-528.html --[[User:JenkinsJinkies|JenkinsJinkies]] 01:08, 5 May 2010 (UTC)}}

===8 May, 03:09 - 03:16===
Chris then turned to the [[List of Chris's PSN game downloads]], clarifying that his ''Resistance: Fall of Man'' add-on pack was not bought by the trolls who took over his [[PSN]], but his ''[[Wikipedia:Killzone_2|Killzone 2]]'' pack was.<ref>[http://www.sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=List_of_Chris's_PSN_game_downloads&diff=prev&oldid=88589 List of Chris's PSN game downloads]</ref> He also said that the ''[[wikipedia:Downfall (film)|Downfall]]'' he bought was a movie, not a video game,<ref>[http://www.sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=List_of_Chris%27s_PSN_game_downloads&action=historysubmit&diff=88592&oldid=88590 List of Chris's PSN game downloads]</ref> and removed a slanderous mockery implying that his [[duck]] was small.<ref>[http://www.sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=List_of_Chris's_PSN_game_downloads&diff=prev&oldid=88590 List of Chris's PSN game downloads]</ref>

===3 July, 16:02 - 16:25===
Chris created the bizarre [[Coffee Place]] article, quoted below, in which he ranted about [[Amanda]], a part-time [[manajerks|manajerk]], who wouldn't give Chris a ''[[Wikipedia:The Twilight Saga: Eclipse|The Twilight Saga: Eclipse]]'' Sweepstake token because he only bought a $1.09 ice cream.
{{quotebox|
{{Taxpayermoneynoinclude}}

[[File:Burgerking.jpg|thumb|A view of the counter where behind which has its own Troublemakers.]]

'''Coffee Anyone?'''

Within this single fast-food joint of the small town of Ruckersville, VA, Bobby goes for a morning coffee and breakfast most days of the week. Sadly, though, on some of those days, along with other seinor citizens who have been going there for years for their own "Early Bird Specials", they get harassed by one or two of the snot-nosed, snooty employees.

One of which, Amanda, is one of the Part-Time [[Manajerks]] who gives her elders the coldest of shoulders. Even with the recent Twilight sweepstakes, one or two of these folks who have enjoyed the Medium Icees for a single dollar and nine cents during their limited-time promotion and received the cups with the game pieces on them, Amanda recently decided that "One Dollar is TOO LITTLE for a Piece of the Sweepstakes Action."

Amanda also really Opens Up for the Black People; she would be most friendly to any of the black people. Uncle Ruckus would really kick the shit out of the bitch for not treating us white people with good kindness and respect. All of the seinors who loyally come in for their daily morning bread would just itch for the chance to smack her ass and crack her [[china]] in due respect to the harassment she has butthurt unto them.

'''Amanda'''

Not much else is known about Amanda at the moment, but the seinors have heard that she is a mother of two (probably get a daily butthurt from her every night). She is also assumed to be still married. I feel really sorry for the dude who has put up with that woman for the amount of time they've been married.

'''More Coffee Goodness'''

It has been reported that Chrissy has been sighted there, but no photographs has been taken, aside from the one above, of him inside the restaurant.

Photographic evidence should be sent to cwcsightings(AT)hotmail.com! Also, feel free to show off to everyone around you at the time the fresh Gay Trucker Photographs are taken. Users will be greatly rewarded with [[china]] and/or [[pickle|pickles]]!
}}

This edit was the first where Chris began to make his presence known. All edits under the JenkinsJinkies name were subtle up until this point, where any effort of subtlety ends. Chris made it obvious that it was him right from the start, both from his [[Chris and English|poor spelling]] and his terrible attempt to imitate what he believes [[trolls]] are like; for example, he obviously believes trolls to be [[Chris and race|racist]], so he goes off on a tangent about black people halfway through. He believes that all trolls have [[Chris and sex|sexual issues]], so he acts like an outright misogynist in the last paragraph. He also attempts using internet slang like the word "butthurt", which he somehow manages to [[Honor roll|use as a verb]]. Chris also updated the [[Template:Places|places template]] accordingly to link to his new article.

===3 July, 20:16===
After CWCkians later arrived and saw that some faggot had put up a shitty article with no citations or real evidence of anything happening, they assumed a troll pretending to be Chris, or else a [[slow-in-the-minds|really stupid person]], and put up a deletion template. Chris noticed and leapt to the article's defense on the talk page with this textwall.

{{quotebox|
'''Do Not Delete; Pursue for the Drama.'''

My family and I were there one morning a couple of weeks ago; my camera was screwing up with me, so I ended up with the photo of the front counter. I haven't been back for a while (Damn parents won't drive me back there), and I'm only 14.

Robert was shouting at Amanda, and eventually Chrissy joined in with an uproar so loud, it would have awaken the dead. It was in response to Amanda harassing them that day. I asked around after Robert and Chris left, without my family taking notice of me.

I can get away with anything within my reach; I'm the middle child of a set of three in my family. Sadly, we were only passing through that week on our way back from a visit with my Grandma and Grandpa in South VA; we live up in Boston.

Being bullied as a Freshman last year in my High School was no fucking picnic either. And I really loath ANYONE who is even considered "Special". I'm Special enough on my own for being invisible yet able to attract attention remotely with a mere thought or do-nothing and having to put up with the aggresiveness in my fucking family; I am very much the Master Mind in the family. My father is damned retarded.

But enough about me, I hate Chris as much as the rest of you. Stopping the presses on his books and giving up his website; it still pisses me off. If I recall correctly, it was about 10:30 when the Father and Son Duo left, so best bet is about 10:00 AM to try and intercept. I want to see Chris, if not both of them, squirm in torture from our Trolling of him. I really want to see him blow his top off again. LULZ.

Oh, and the Windows at that place were Tinted, so the photography would be best from inside the place.

For the LULZ!!!!

--[[User:JenkinsJinkies|JenkinsJinkies]] 22:16, 3 July 2010 (UTC)
}}

Here, Chris established his troll backstory and continued trying to act as close to what he believed a troll to be like as possible. This time he plays the part of a [[BlueSpike|sadist]] who hates Chris because he's [[Autism|special]], was [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|bullied at school]], and had [[Bob Chandler|daddy issues]], because that is what real trolls are like entirely.

===11 July, 19:43 - 12 July, 08:05===
In response to [[Clyde Cash|Clyde]] leaving Chris a message on his user talk page, asking for his personal information so he could send him a reward for providing them with information, Chris posted this strange rambling.

{{quotebox|
Thanks, man, but I'm good; I lost my young virginity with a Seinor Cheerleader; her china was sweeeeettt! Plus, as an Anon, I prefer to keep my add off of the web. I would not want Chris coming after my ass. The mindfuck that he is, I would not want to fall victim of one of his impulsive manchild rampages. I just enjoy getting the LULZ off of him.

That's all the info I got of [[Amanda]]; my family and I don't travel to South VA that often, but I'll see if I can hitch another trip and find a place to crash in VA. I wouldn't be missed; I am soo overlooked in my family.

Something else that has piqued my curiousity, from the [[Hooker incident]], I'm wondering from which luscious company or group [[Bryan Bash]] the ladies came from, specifically the company name, their website, and from within Chris's crappy (434) A.C. Because if they were out-of-his-state, I may give them a call myself. >:D

Thank you for your support, [[User:Clydec|Clydec]]; you're awesome.

--[[User:JenkinsJinkies|JenkinsJinkies]] 18:43, 11 July 2010 (UTC)
}}

The main focus of the message seems to be Chris establishing more of his troll backstory, giving excuses as to why he couldn't give Clyde his details, and dropping as many troll buzzwords as possible, like "[[4-cent_garbage.com|Anon]]" and "[[Laughs Under Lucricities|LULZ]]". He also inquires about the hookers sent to his house by Bryan Bash, likely so he can take advantage of their services to get rid of his hated [[Virgin with rage|virginity]]. Also notice how even when he's deep undercover as a Chris-hating troll, he still feels the need to bolster his own [[Chris and his Ego|ego]], claiming to be genuinely afraid of Chris; something no other than Chris himself could ever consider seriously other than a joke.

When Clyde pointed out appropriately that being afraid of Chris indicated that Jenkins was a pussy, Chris replied with:

{{quotebox|
Firstly, I am not a pussy; I am as wild as a serial raper. Second, I saw those videos; he is still a curiously impulsive individual. It is people like him that tend to explode in a hidden-potential fury that could be very dangerous. While you may see him as a weak fuck, I see a crazy man who will likely strike at any given moment.

During the time now, I enjoy laughing during his weaker moments, yet I still am concerned in what intelligence and fury lie within him waiting to strike. He may be only waiting and plotting for the day when he may hunt us down, one by one. We can only hope that day will never come.

--[[User:JenkinsJinkies|JenkinsJinkies]] 07:05, 12 July 2010 (UTC)
}}

Again, despite being undercover as a troll, Chris spends time trying to convince Clyde and others that he is very [[I AM STRONG|strong]], [[Honor roll|intelligent]] and will [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|probably kill them all]]. Again, these are things which only Chris could ever seriously believe. Also add "wild as a serial raper" to the list of memorable Chris-Chan quotes.

===13 July, 22:24===
And of course, where would we be without a little advertising? Even while pretending to be a troll, Chris still [[Chris and his Ego|couldn't resist]] breaking cover yet again to advertise his ''[[ModNation Racers]]'' beta tracks.

{{quotebox|
'''He has his Beta Track Up'''

As well as some actually neatly recreated Hot Wheels vehicles. He locked a couple of them; the manchild must have Favorited those TWO cars from his collection. LOL His track is lengthy, and confusing, but I managed to run some laps on it. And he added a good version of the Park with a fountain, and a Beach.

Download his Beta Cwcville Track for the laughs of using the defaulted Beta Tools.--[[User:JenkinsJinkies|JenkinsJinkies]] 22:24, 13 July 2010 (UTC)
}}

This was his last edit on the CWCki before he signed up for [[Trollin Train]], which was a scheme by Clyde and [[Surfshack Tito]] to trick Chris into destroying his [[PS3]]. It ended in [[The MovingFoward videos|great success]]. All further JenkinsJinkies dumbfuckery is documented on the Trollin Train article.

==Christianchandler==

[[Special:Contributions/Christianchandler|All edits]]

===4 November, 18:26 - 18:32===

Chris's first action under this account was to upload three photos of [[Michael Snyder]] taken with his [[Nintendo|3DS]] during the [[28 October 2011]] incident. The first was taken from the interior of [[The GAMe PLACe]], and was put on its CWCki article. The other two were taken in the parking lot from inside [[Son-Chu]]; they were added on Snyder's article, one of them replacing an [[:File:2004 merchant of venice 008.jpg|existing image]]. Chris added his own captions, in which he hilariously [[Chris and hypocrisy|mocked]] [[Obesity|Snyder's weight]] and accused him of being a [[Pedofork|child-molesting]] [[Chris and religion#Judaism|Jew]].

The photos Chris uploaded are below, including his captions.

<gallery>
File:HNI 0020.JPG|"The inside of the PLACe as of October 27, 2011."

File:HNI 0021.JPG|"Look at his "slender" figure."
File:HNI 0022.JPG|"Michael Snyder, the dirty '''Fat''', child-molesting <s>Jew</s> gentile."

</gallery>

===4 November, 18:40 - 18:41===

Chris proceeded to make the second photo the Picture of the Now...

{{quotebox|[[File:HNI_0021.JPG|200px|left]] [[Michael Snyder, in the flesh.]]!|}}

...And subsequently added mentions of all three to [[:Template:Da Update|Da Update]].

{{quotebox|*4 [[November 2011|October]]: [[Michael Snyder]]; up close and personal in three new "HNI" photographs.}}

===4 November 20:02 - 20:03===

Chris returned about 80 minutes later to upload two new pictures. The first is of an [[anime]] girl named XBOX360ko, apparently a human with every feature of an [[HEXBox|XBOX 360]]. He then replaced the second Snyder photo with a picture of a colorful fox. The bottom-right corner reads [[Chris and copyright|©]] [[Chris and his Ego|ME ME ME ME ME]]. The purposes of both photos are [[Random-access humor|unknown]].

<gallery>
File:481px-360tankx6.jpg
File:Chrisfox.JPG
</gallery>

==References==
<references/>

==See also==
*[[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica]]
*[[CWCki]]
*[[JenkinsJinkies]]
*[[Coffee Place]]

{{The Internet}}

[[Category:Lists]]

Template:Video of the now

2015-06-22T02:37:46Z

Alan Pardew: Reverted edits by Adventure (talk) to last revision by Eamoo

<div style="text-align: center;">{{#ev:youtube|Nt4bendSh1E}}
</div>

<noinclude>{{clear}}{{Usage|1= This template sits pride of place on the CWCki [[Main Page]]. It is used to display a video, which is normally related to recent Chris activity - or in quieter times - amusing fan-created content. Suggestions for new videos of the now can be discussed on [[Template talk:Video of the now|this template's talk page]].}}[[Category:Front page templates]]</noinclude>

List of Chris's edits to the CWCki

2015-06-22T02:33:15Z

Alan Pardew: /* Sonichuchandler */ Wait for confirmation first

[[File:Chrisshotweb.jpg|thumb|Summary of the incident.]]
After Chris discovered the [[CWCki]] in [[March 2010]], he [[CWC Blog#14 March 2010|demanded]] that pages related to his family and [[gal pals]] be removed, giving two deadlines. Around midnight on [[April 2010|1 April]], past the second deadline, he decided to attack CWCki, signing up as [[User:GodofThunderGodofWar|GodofThunderGodofWar]]. In true CWC style, his [[Special:Contributions/GodofThunderGodofWar|vandalism]] was less than impressive. In fact, since he made them on April Fools' Day, many users just assumed that it was an elaborate and lulzy prank on the part of the administrators. But no, it was f'real. Christian vandalized the CWCki's articles to make them look as if they are praising him. As usual Chris's [[Chris and English|tenuous grasp of grammar]] made his edits stand out like a sore thumb.

Chris later returned under the guise of [[User:JenkinsJinkies|JenkinsJinkies]], making several posts from 5 [[May 2010]] to 13 [[July 2010]]. Chris returned again about a year later as [[User:Christianchandler|Christianchandler]] on [[November 2011|4 November 2011]], part of the [[28 October 2011]] aftermath. He uploaded three pictures of [[Michael Snyder]].

Although Chris originally demanded that the CWCki's administrators only edit or remove pages related to his friends and family, it is perhaps telling that when he finally set himself to actively vandalizing the site, he ignored those pages, choosing instead to make edits [[Chris and his Ego|glorifying himself]].

Showing that he will never let go of this website, Chris returned on 21 [[June 2015]] with some good old-fashioned vandalism.

Listed below are all of Chris's edits made on his accounts, unedited by trolls and exactly as he wrote them. An exception is made for headings, which are replaced with '''bold text''' in the quoteboxes.

==GodofThunderGodofWar==

[[Special:Contributions/GodofThunderGodofWar|All edits]]

===1 April, 12:35===
His first action was editing the Did You Know? column, removing the majority of the factoids while adding a few of his own, most of which were merely rewrites of existing comments. Hilariously, he begins to glorify himself only ''after'' stating "The CWCki is a LOAD OF BULL", effectively nullifying his own attempts.

{{quotebox|
*...This webiste, the CWCki, is a LOAD OF BULL?
*...that Christian Chandler ALWAYS IS the mayor of [[CWCville]]?
*...that [[Pixelblocks]] are not to be confused with neither [[Pickles|Pickleblocks]] nor [[Prickly-Wicklies|Pricklyblocks]]?
*...that Chris buys healthy food, good drinks and just necessities with Good Money?
*...that Chris has been recording himself as early as [[Manchester High School|10th grade]]?
}}

The following comments however, were left untouched.

{{quotebox|
*...that a [[Curse-ye-ham-ye-ha Retraction|Forgiveness blessing]] can counter the extreme bad luck and misfortune associated with the [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]] attack?
*...that [[Chris]]'s sense of humor is [[Random-access humor|SO RANDOM XDXD]]?
*...that Chris is the [[The Game Place#Chris.27s_antics|Level Up King]]?
*...that [[Virginia is for Virgins]]?
*...that Chris really likes [[Britney Spears]] (no matter what they all say)?
:*...that his favorite song from "[[:Image:CWCSchuBrit.jpg|Air Britney]]" is ''[E-Mail My Heart]''?*
*...that Chris is a descendant of [[Anne Boleyn]], Queen of England?
}}

Some of the factoids were likely left alone because Chris failed to [[Autism|notice their sarcasm]] and mistook them for compliments. [[Naïve|On a troll site]]. It should also be noted that the Pixelblocks factoid was also untouched, save for Chris adding the word "not" in the middle. It was likely that he perceived it to be a spelling mistake and decided to correct it, even though the word "neither" instead of "either" later in the sentence causes Chris to [[Chris and English|''add'' a mistake instead]]. Chris finally relinked [[Song of Christian]] to "10th grade", a broken link.

*Altered for this article. This normally links to a [[YouTube]] video, but external links mess up the quoteboxes.

===1 April, 12:42===
Chris then changed the "Article of the Now" from [[Ian Brandon Anderson]] to himself.

{{quotebox|
[[Image:0782-CWCSpread.JPG|right|200px|lolwut.]]

'''Christian Weston Chandler''' (born '''Christopher Weston Chandler''' on 24 February [[1982]]) is a [[autism|high-functioning autistic]] [[virgin with rage|virgin]], Honest, Cool and Honest Dude, and creator of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]], a [[brilliant]] character, starring in his own self-titled [[Sonichu (comic)|online comic book]].

His adult life has been largely defined by his goal of most Normal Human Beings; Finding their Meaning of Existence, Their True Love, Their own Self-Character. No One should ever interfere or ever make a mockery of such a tride and true quest to finding HIS own Happiness with his WOMAN who is to be his Wife.

Yes, friends, it gets far sweeter.
}}

This edit is perhaps the most condensed essence of Christian to ever emerge in pseudo-paragraph format. Between the utter butchery of the English language, blatant ego stroking, and unintentional creepiness ("Yes, friends, it gets far sweeter"), Christian pretty much sums up what legions of trolls have spent nearly half a decade trying to record for the world. Also note that, while on a website dedicated to trolling him, he still attempts to insert links to other parts of the wiki. In all likelihood, Chris planned to vandalize these elements as well but stopped due to [[stress]]. In the original edit, the link "brilliant" linked instead to the Fail page. Much like the 10th grade link example above, Chris removed this part and created a red link.

===1 April, 12:44===
A couple of minutes after, he made the infamous [[CWCRockin4Way.jpg]] the Picture of the Now.

{{quotebox|[[Image:CWCRockin4Way.jpg|300px|left|lolwut?]]

A recently leaked image shows an illustration by [[Chris]] having [[Sweet, Sweet Sex]] with three young women, including a white one, a black one, and one in-between.Chocolate-Vanilla Swirls!!! YAY! 8D}}

Not much needs saying here. Chris chose the image and added some [[random-access humor]]. Why this image? Nobody knows. Also, the red link this time was actually put in entirely by Chris himself, rather than being another unintentional mistake. Why he thought the CWCki would have a page on "Sweet, Sweet Sex" is anyone's guess.

==JenkinsJinkies==

[[Special:Contributions/JenkinsJinkies|All edits]]

===5 May, 01:08===
In his first edit on the new account, Chris commented on [[PS3/How the PS3 is Hacked|the hacking]] of the [[PS3]], saying the supposed bug was just an antenna. However, later that day he tore out the antenna anyway, just to be safe.<ref>[[I Pimp My Ride.MOV]]</ref>

{{quotebox|
'''Dude, Really? That's an Antenna'''

I trolled around and found it. http://www.eeshops.com/ps3-wifi-antenna-tyco-19039281-w400-p-528.html --[[User:JenkinsJinkies|JenkinsJinkies]] 01:08, 5 May 2010 (UTC)}}

===8 May, 03:09 - 03:16===
Chris then turned to the [[List of Chris's PSN game downloads]], clarifying that his ''Resistance: Fall of Man'' add-on pack was not bought by the trolls who took over his [[PSN]], but his ''[[Wikipedia:Killzone_2|Killzone 2]]'' pack was.<ref>[http://www.sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=List_of_Chris's_PSN_game_downloads&diff=prev&oldid=88589 List of Chris's PSN game downloads]</ref> He also said that the ''[[wikipedia:Downfall (film)|Downfall]]'' he bought was a movie, not a video game,<ref>[http://www.sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=List_of_Chris%27s_PSN_game_downloads&action=historysubmit&diff=88592&oldid=88590 List of Chris's PSN game downloads]</ref> and removed a slanderous mockery implying that his [[duck]] was small.<ref>[http://www.sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=List_of_Chris's_PSN_game_downloads&diff=prev&oldid=88590 List of Chris's PSN game downloads]</ref>

===3 July, 16:02 - 16:25===
Chris created the bizarre [[Coffee Place]] article, quoted below, in which he ranted about [[Amanda]], a part-time [[manajerks|manajerk]], who wouldn't give Chris a ''[[Wikipedia:The Twilight Saga: Eclipse|The Twilight Saga: Eclipse]]'' Sweepstake token because he only bought a $1.09 ice cream.
{{quotebox|
{{Taxpayermoneynoinclude}}

[[File:Burgerking.jpg|thumb|A view of the counter where behind which has its own Troublemakers.]]

'''Coffee Anyone?'''

Within this single fast-food joint of the small town of Ruckersville, VA, Bobby goes for a morning coffee and breakfast most days of the week. Sadly, though, on some of those days, along with other seinor citizens who have been going there for years for their own "Early Bird Specials", they get harassed by one or two of the snot-nosed, snooty employees.

One of which, Amanda, is one of the Part-Time [[Manajerks]] who gives her elders the coldest of shoulders. Even with the recent Twilight sweepstakes, one or two of these folks who have enjoyed the Medium Icees for a single dollar and nine cents during their limited-time promotion and received the cups with the game pieces on them, Amanda recently decided that "One Dollar is TOO LITTLE for a Piece of the Sweepstakes Action."

Amanda also really Opens Up for the Black People; she would be most friendly to any of the black people. Uncle Ruckus would really kick the shit out of the bitch for not treating us white people with good kindness and respect. All of the seinors who loyally come in for their daily morning bread would just itch for the chance to smack her ass and crack her [[china]] in due respect to the harassment she has butthurt unto them.

'''Amanda'''

Not much else is known about Amanda at the moment, but the seinors have heard that she is a mother of two (probably get a daily butthurt from her every night). She is also assumed to be still married. I feel really sorry for the dude who has put up with that woman for the amount of time they've been married.

'''More Coffee Goodness'''

It has been reported that Chrissy has been sighted there, but no photographs has been taken, aside from the one above, of him inside the restaurant.

Photographic evidence should be sent to cwcsightings(AT)hotmail.com! Also, feel free to show off to everyone around you at the time the fresh Gay Trucker Photographs are taken. Users will be greatly rewarded with [[china]] and/or [[pickle|pickles]]!
}}

This edit was the first where Chris began to make his presence known. All edits under the JenkinsJinkies name were subtle up until this point, where any effort of subtlety ends. Chris made it obvious that it was him right from the start, both from his [[Chris and English|poor spelling]] and his terrible attempt to imitate what he believes [[trolls]] are like; for example, he obviously believes trolls to be [[Chris and race|racist]], so he goes off on a tangent about black people halfway through. He believes that all trolls have [[Chris and sex|sexual issues]], so he acts like an outright misogynist in the last paragraph. He also attempts using internet slang like the word "butthurt", which he somehow manages to [[Honor roll|use as a verb]]. Chris also updated the [[Template:Places|places template]] accordingly to link to his new article.

===3 July, 20:16===
After CWCkians later arrived and saw that some faggot had put up a shitty article with no citations or real evidence of anything happening, they assumed a troll pretending to be Chris, or else a [[slow-in-the-minds|really stupid person]], and put up a deletion template. Chris noticed and leapt to the article's defense on the talk page with this textwall.

{{quotebox|
'''Do Not Delete; Pursue for the Drama.'''

My family and I were there one morning a couple of weeks ago; my camera was screwing up with me, so I ended up with the photo of the front counter. I haven't been back for a while (Damn parents won't drive me back there), and I'm only 14.

Robert was shouting at Amanda, and eventually Chrissy joined in with an uproar so loud, it would have awaken the dead. It was in response to Amanda harassing them that day. I asked around after Robert and Chris left, without my family taking notice of me.

I can get away with anything within my reach; I'm the middle child of a set of three in my family. Sadly, we were only passing through that week on our way back from a visit with my Grandma and Grandpa in South VA; we live up in Boston.

Being bullied as a Freshman last year in my High School was no fucking picnic either. And I really loath ANYONE who is even considered "Special". I'm Special enough on my own for being invisible yet able to attract attention remotely with a mere thought or do-nothing and having to put up with the aggresiveness in my fucking family; I am very much the Master Mind in the family. My father is damned retarded.

But enough about me, I hate Chris as much as the rest of you. Stopping the presses on his books and giving up his website; it still pisses me off. If I recall correctly, it was about 10:30 when the Father and Son Duo left, so best bet is about 10:00 AM to try and intercept. I want to see Chris, if not both of them, squirm in torture from our Trolling of him. I really want to see him blow his top off again. LULZ.

Oh, and the Windows at that place were Tinted, so the photography would be best from inside the place.

For the LULZ!!!!

--[[User:JenkinsJinkies|JenkinsJinkies]] 22:16, 3 July 2010 (UTC)
}}

Here, Chris established his troll backstory and continued trying to act as close to what he believed a troll to be like as possible. This time he plays the part of a [[BlueSpike|sadist]] who hates Chris because he's [[Autism|special]], was [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|bullied at school]], and had [[Bob Chandler|daddy issues]], because that is what real trolls are like entirely.

===11 July, 19:43 - 12 July, 08:05===
In response to [[Clyde Cash|Clyde]] leaving Chris a message on his user talk page, asking for his personal information so he could send him a reward for providing them with information, Chris posted this strange rambling.

{{quotebox|
Thanks, man, but I'm good; I lost my young virginity with a Seinor Cheerleader; her china was sweeeeettt! Plus, as an Anon, I prefer to keep my add off of the web. I would not want Chris coming after my ass. The mindfuck that he is, I would not want to fall victim of one of his impulsive manchild rampages. I just enjoy getting the LULZ off of him.

That's all the info I got of [[Amanda]]; my family and I don't travel to South VA that often, but I'll see if I can hitch another trip and find a place to crash in VA. I wouldn't be missed; I am soo overlooked in my family.

Something else that has piqued my curiousity, from the [[Hooker incident]], I'm wondering from which luscious company or group [[Bryan Bash]] the ladies came from, specifically the company name, their website, and from within Chris's crappy (434) A.C. Because if they were out-of-his-state, I may give them a call myself. >:D

Thank you for your support, [[User:Clydec|Clydec]]; you're awesome.

--[[User:JenkinsJinkies|JenkinsJinkies]] 18:43, 11 July 2010 (UTC)
}}

The main focus of the message seems to be Chris establishing more of his troll backstory, giving excuses as to why he couldn't give Clyde his details, and dropping as many troll buzzwords as possible, like "[[4-cent_garbage.com|Anon]]" and "[[Laughs Under Lucricities|LULZ]]". He also inquires about the hookers sent to his house by Bryan Bash, likely so he can take advantage of their services to get rid of his hated [[Virgin with rage|virginity]]. Also notice how even when he's deep undercover as a Chris-hating troll, he still feels the need to bolster his own [[Chris and his Ego|ego]], claiming to be genuinely afraid of Chris; something no other than Chris himself could ever consider seriously other than a joke.

When Clyde pointed out appropriately that being afraid of Chris indicated that Jenkins was a pussy, Chris replied with:

{{quotebox|
Firstly, I am not a pussy; I am as wild as a serial raper. Second, I saw those videos; he is still a curiously impulsive individual. It is people like him that tend to explode in a hidden-potential fury that could be very dangerous. While you may see him as a weak fuck, I see a crazy man who will likely strike at any given moment.

During the time now, I enjoy laughing during his weaker moments, yet I still am concerned in what intelligence and fury lie within him waiting to strike. He may be only waiting and plotting for the day when he may hunt us down, one by one. We can only hope that day will never come.

--[[User:JenkinsJinkies|JenkinsJinkies]] 07:05, 12 July 2010 (UTC)
}}

Again, despite being undercover as a troll, Chris spends time trying to convince Clyde and others that he is very [[I AM STRONG|strong]], [[Honor roll|intelligent]] and will [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|probably kill them all]]. Again, these are things which only Chris could ever seriously believe. Also add "wild as a serial raper" to the list of memorable Chris-Chan quotes.

===13 July, 22:24===
And of course, where would we be without a little advertising? Even while pretending to be a troll, Chris still [[Chris and his Ego|couldn't resist]] breaking cover yet again to advertise his ''[[ModNation Racers]]'' beta tracks.

{{quotebox|
'''He has his Beta Track Up'''

As well as some actually neatly recreated Hot Wheels vehicles. He locked a couple of them; the manchild must have Favorited those TWO cars from his collection. LOL His track is lengthy, and confusing, but I managed to run some laps on it. And he added a good version of the Park with a fountain, and a Beach.

Download his Beta Cwcville Track for the laughs of using the defaulted Beta Tools.--[[User:JenkinsJinkies|JenkinsJinkies]] 22:24, 13 July 2010 (UTC)
}}

This was his last edit on the CWCki before he signed up for [[Trollin Train]], which was a scheme by Clyde and [[Surfshack Tito]] to trick Chris into destroying his [[PS3]]. It ended in [[The MovingFoward videos|great success]]. All further JenkinsJinkies dumbfuckery is documented on the Trollin Train article.

==Christianchandler==

[[Special:Contributions/Christianchandler|All edits]]

===4 November, 18:26 - 18:32===

Chris's first action under this account was to upload three photos of [[Michael Snyder]] taken with his [[Nintendo|3DS]] during the [[28 October 2011]] incident. The first was taken from the interior of [[The GAMe PLACe]], and was put on its CWCki article. The other two were taken in the parking lot from inside [[Son-Chu]]; they were added on Snyder's article, one of them replacing an [[:File:2004 merchant of venice 008.jpg|existing image]]. Chris added his own captions, in which he hilariously [[Chris and hypocrisy|mocked]] [[Obesity|Snyder's weight]] and accused him of being a [[Pedofork|child-molesting]] [[Chris and religion#Judaism|Jew]].

The photos Chris uploaded are below, including his captions.

<gallery>
File:HNI 0020.JPG|"The inside of the PLACe as of October 27, 2011."

File:HNI 0021.JPG|"Look at his "slender" figure."
File:HNI 0022.JPG|"Michael Snyder, the dirty '''Fat''', child-molesting <s>Jew</s> gentile."

</gallery>

===4 November, 18:40 - 18:41===

Chris proceeded to make the second photo the Picture of the Now...

{{quotebox|[[File:HNI_0021.JPG|200px|left]] [[Michael Snyder, in the flesh.]]!|}}

...And subsequently added mentions of all three to [[:Template:Da Update|Da Update]].

{{quotebox|*4 [[November 2011|October]]: [[Michael Snyder]]; up close and personal in three new "HNI" photographs.}}

===4 November 20:02 - 20:03===

Chris returned about 80 minutes later to upload two new pictures. The first is of an [[anime]] girl named XBOX360ko, apparently a human with every feature of an [[HEXBox|XBOX 360]]. He then replaced the second Snyder photo with a picture of a colorful fox. The bottom-right corner reads [[Chris and copyright|©]] [[Chris and his Ego|ME ME ME ME ME]]. The purposes of both photos are [[Random-access humor|unknown]].

<gallery>
File:481px-360tankx6.jpg
File:Chrisfox.JPG
</gallery>

==References==
<references/>

==See also==
*[[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica]]
*[[CWCki]]
*[[JenkinsJinkies]]
*[[Coffee Place]]

{{The Internet}}

[[Category:Lists]]

Template:Da update

2015-06-22T02:31:35Z

Alan Pardew: Wait for a confirmation of this first.

<center>[[Image:News.jpg]]</center>
* 13 [[June 2015|June]] - Chris is disappointed by the fact that [[My Little Pony|Derpy]] is referred to in the credits as "Muffins".
* 12 June - Chris attends the [[Impulse Gay Social-Club]] again and takes pictures of himself being a burlesque dancer.
* 12 June - Chris says he'll stop hating ''Sonic Boom'', on one condition--that Sega ''gives 10 valid reasons why Sonic's arms should be blue''.
* 12 June - Chris says the gender-bender of [[Chris-chan Sonichu|Chris-Chan Sonichu]] is good simply because he is a female soul in a [[JERKS|JERK]] body.
* 11 June - Chris continues to pester his white knights into rallying against you-know-what. Twice.
* 11 June - Chris's latest court date. The result was, you guessed it, '''''another fucking continuance'''''.

<noinclude>{{clear}}{{Usage|1= This template sits in a place of pride on the CWCki [[Main Page]]. It is a list of recent Chris-related activity, namely new content. To prevent the list becoming too long, older entries should be removed as newer ones are added - with no more than 7 entries being displayed. To add new update to the list, simply edit this template and place a brief description of what happened at the top of bulleted list. Entries should also be documented on the [[{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}} {{CURRENTYEAR}}|current month article]].}}[[Category:Front page templates]]</noinclude>

June 2015

2015-06-22T02:28:51Z

Alan Pardew: I'll wait for confirmation of this. But it doesn't seem like Chris to me.

{{Ongoing}}
{{quote|Maybe, but only if we give Sonichu blue arms, three scarves, and ultimately just redesign him as Big the Cat.|Chris being mocked by [[Sonic the Hedgehog|his hero]] on [[Twitter]]}}
[[File:CallMeChristine.jpg|thumb|right|On '''7 June 2015''', Chris advises you call him Chris''tine''.]]

'''June''' is the 6th month of '''[[2015]]'''. [[Chris]]'s ''next'' court date took place on 11 June, and got delayed '''yet again''' to 23 [[July 2015|July]]. This month commences the start of summer, which Chris'll most likely spend playing [[vidya]] and loitering at the [[Impulse Gay Social-Club]], provided that he doesn't get sentenced. It is also the month that scientists discover the [[Sonichu 10|"homo gene."]]

==Events of June==
* 3 June - Chris once again pesters his [[fans]] on [[Facebook]] to get [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] into ''Super Smash Bros. for Wii U and [[Nintendo]] [[3DS]]'', and also announces that he has more [[Sonichu Amiibo]] made.
* 3 June - Chris also shows (once again) his disapproval for ''[[Sonic Boom]]''.
* 4 June - Chris posts a photo to Facebook revealing that a slip of his [[pocket knife]] resulted in a bad cut and a trip to the emergency room.
* 6 June - Chris yet again pesters his [[white knights]] to get Sonichu in ''Super Smash Bros.''
* 7 June - Chris discovers the trend of transwomen making [[parody]] ''Vanity Fair'' magazine covers of themselves, and as such creates his own.
* 8 June - Chris changes his [[voicemail]].
* 9 June - The next ''[[Sonic Boom]]'' game is announced. Chris [[Chris and anger|disapproves]] and even [[Death threats|threatens]] [[Sega]] producer [[Omar Woodley]].
* 9 June - Chris shares a link to an article that says social media should stop [[Clyde Cash the kid video|cyberbullying]].
* 9 June - Chris once again shows no apologetic shame for [[26 December 2014]], and purchases a blue-armed Sonic doll [[Chris and money|just to tear its arms off]].
* 10 June - Chris's white knights refuse to help him this time with his hatred of blue arms. [[Kim Wilson]] and Mellanie Chafe say that he could just cover the blue arms with cream-colored felt, and that attacking people with Mace is assault. Kim also mockingly says "Oh wow, where'd you get that plush? Did you steal it?"
* 10 June - [[Sega]] acknowledges Sonichu and Chris's existence for the [[Chris in the media#Sega Acknowledges Sonichu|second time]], and mocks his reaction to [[Sonic Boom Protests|Sonic having blue arms]].<ref>https://archive.is/eWfjQ</ref>
* 10 June - Chris attends the LGBTQ Youth & Family Bowling Night event in [[Charlottesville]].
* 11 June - Chris's latest court date. The result was, you guessed it, '''''another fucking continuance'''''. Chris was said to have been uncharacteristically normal and sociable.
* 11 June - Chris continues to pester his white knights into rallying against you-know-what. Twice.
* 12 June - Chris says the gender-bender of [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]] is good simply because he is a female soul in a [[JERK]] body.
* 12 June - Chris says he'll stop hating ''Sonic Boom'', on one condition--that Sega ''gives 10 valid reasons why Sonic's arms should be blue''.
* 12 June - Chris attends the [[Impulse Gay Social-Club]] again and takes pictures of himself being a burlesque dancer.
* 13 June - Chris is disappointed by the fact that [[My Little Pony|Derpy Hooves]] is referred to in the credits as "Muffins", and posts a screenshot of her scene in the ''MLP:FiM'' episode "Slice of Life" that is unbelievably [[Chris and cinematography|overexposed]]. He also shows his complete unwillingness to at least add some spoiler tags.
* 15 June - Chris posts a picture of 2 lizards in amplexus (which is against [[Facebook]] rules even though it got past the radar) and rambles on about his [[tomgirl]] status.
* 17 June - Chris sells a "1990 American Silver Eagle .999 Silver 1oz Dollar Coin" on [[eBay]].
* 20 June - Chris joins a Legit Lady Gamers [[contest]].
* 21 June - [[Father]]'s Day.
* 30 June - [[Club Nintendo]] will shut down in America.

==References==
<references/>

{{Timeline}}

Main Page

2015-04-01T12:15:59Z

Alan Pardew:

Due to the request of ''Christian Weston Chandler'', this afternoon, '''we''' at the CWCki have independently decided to remove this main page from our site. We have also removed all references that '''slander, vilify, demean, found to be overly offensive, ableist, sexist and giving her emotional stress.''' In plain terms, this ordeal has gone on '''far too long''' and '''gotten far out of hand'''. We have unfairly focused on her to the point of intruding in her private life and causing her '''great personal grief, "''lonely, sad and depressed''", "''distressed and upset''", "''constantly hurt''", "''constant, zombie-like, blank''", "''lost''", "''in misery''", having the "''worst broken heart ever''"''' which no person should ever have to endure. This behavior is '''not in line with our site goals''', and we '''never wanted something like this'''. Still, we must take '''complete responsibility''' for all our actions, both '''public and private'''. And that is why we are speaking to you today. But we say to you now that at no time did we ask anyone to lie, hide, or destroy evidence, or to take any other unlawful action.

We know that her public comments on Facebook and her silence about this matter gave a false impression. We misled people, including even '''her family and her friends.''' We also reached to the point of having being overly obsessed with her, and we deeply regret that. We are also sorry for misgendering her as we receive a lot of backlash from various websites, one of them is r/GamerGhazi. We can only tell you we were motivated by many factors:

'''First''', by a desire to '''protect herself from the embarrassment of her own conduct.'''

She was also very concerned about '''protecting her family'''. According to her, if it wasn't for us for intruding her personal life, '''her father would have been alive today and we're deeply sorry for this.''' The investigation moved on to her family and friends, then into her private life. Because of this, we've reached the point of recently accusing her of shoplifting which we would like to apologise about this as well.

And now the investigation itself is under investigation. According to one of her friends, we've never '''''respected her and treated her like a human being''''' and we're deeply sorry for this as well.

This also has '''gone on too long, cost too much, and hurt too many innocent people.'''

Regardless of any public pressure to reinstate the main page, it must be stressed that our intrusion on Chris's private life will cease, and we intend to reclaim her family life for her family. Even Internet celebrities have private lives. '''It is time to stop the pursuit of personal destruction and the prying into private lives and get on with our national lives.''' Our website has been distracted by this matter for '''far too long''', and we take responsibility for our part in all of this. That is all we can do.

In the future, we're also in progress to sell off this website in order to monetarily compensate Chris as an apology for all of this -- this includes the forum too. Currently, another big box of stuff is on its way to be sent to Chris for all of this. We are currently in progress of having conversations with '''''The GAMe PLACe'', ''Mal-Wart'' and ''McDonalds'' employees''' who are working around his area to unban Chris and '''never ban her from anywhere else, ever.'''

We're also proceeding to take legal steps against the people who troll her -- which include, but not limited to:

*Adam Stackhouse
*Ahuviya Harel
*America
*Amud
*Andrew Dobson
*Anita Sarkeesian
*Anthony 'A-Log' Logatto
*Anna McLerran
*Anna Stackhouse
*Asperpedia Four
*The Ballpit Forum
*Batman
*BILLY MAYS
*Blanca Weiss
*BlueSpike
*Brianna Wu
*Bryan Bash
*Chad Thundercock
*Charlottesville people
*Chris's High School Gal-pals
*Chris's Pastor
*Clyde Cash
*cogsdev
*Cole Smithey
*Connor Bible
*CoolDudeClem
*Coty Smith
*Daniel Mimms and Lucas White
*DarkSydePhil
*David Moyes
*DisneyFan01
*The Dodo Brain
*Dormiebasne
*Eli
*Emily
*Failosophy
*The GODDAMNED PINHEADS
*Gabe Navarro
*The GAMe PLACe
*Glaive
*GodJesus
*Google
*Homer Ruglia Beoulve
*Homos
*Ivy O'Neil
*Jace Connors
*Jack Thaddeus
*Jason Kendrick Howell
*Jay Geis
*Jenn the Tortoise-kin
*Jerkops
*Jimmy Hill
*John Langley
*Joshua Martinez
*Kacey Devoria
*Ken Penders
*Keurig Company
*The Lady Manager at Mal-Wart
*Lauren Faust
*Liquid Chris
*Lordsillynipples
*Louis Van Gaal
*Man in the Pickle Suit
*Mary Lee Walsh
*McDonalds employees
*Megan Schroeder
*Michael Snyder
*MylarBalloonFan
*MysteriousMrEnter
*Nathanael Greene Elementary School
*Null
*The Offline Cyberbully/Troll
*PandaHalo
*Peter Coffin
*Pixyteri
*Richard Heinz
*Rob Bell
*Robert Simmons V
*Robert Wayne Stiles
*Ruckersville people
*Sarah Anne Bevel Ingram
*Sarah Butts
*Sega
*Shigeru Miyamoto
*Sonic The Hedgehog
*Surfshack Tito
*Tara Strong
*Thorg
*TJChurch
*Tyce Andrews
*Vade
*Vivian Gee
*Wizardchan
*WogglebugLoveProductions
*Zoe Quinn

'''Now it is time''' -- in fact, '''it is past time to move on.''' We have important work to do -- '''real opportunities to seize, real problems to solve, real matters to face.'''

And so tonight, we ask you to turn away from the spectacle of the '''''past eight years''''', as we return our attention to all the challenges and all the promise of the next century. After all, to quote Chris herself:

{{quote|For you are not just dragging Christian Weston Chandler's name in the mud, you also drag the American hopes and dreams and ideas of the majority of these great, humble United States of America along with her.}}

We're deeply sorry for not only dragging the American Dream through the mud, but also slandering a true American patriot of proud, Anchuent Cherokian ancestry.

Thank you. And good night.

Main Page

2015-04-01T07:54:36Z

Alan Pardew:

Due to the request of ''Christian Weston Chandler'', this afternoon, '''we''' at the CWCki have independently decided to remove this main page from our site. We have also removed all references that '''slander, vilify, demean, found to be overly offensive, ableist, sexist and giving her emotional stress.''' In plain terms, this ordeal has gone on '''far too long''' and '''gotten far out of hand'''. We have unfairly focused on her to the point of intruding in her private life and causing her '''great personal grief, "''lonely, sad and depressed''", "''distressed and upset''", "''constantly hurt''", "''constant, zombie-like, blank''", "''lost''", "''in misery''", having the "''worst broken heart ever''"''' which no person should ever have to endure. This behavior is '''not in line with our site goals''', and we '''never wanted something like this'''. Still, we must take '''complete responsibility''' for all our actions, both '''public and private'''. And that is why we are speaking to you today. But we say to you now that at no time did we ask anyone to lie, hide, or destroy evidence, or to take any other unlawful action.

We know that her public comments on Facebook and her silence about this matter gave a false impression. We misled people, including even '''her family and her friends.''' We also reached to the point of having being overly obsessed with her, and we deeply regret that. We are also sorry for misgendering her as we receive a lot of backlash from various websites, one of them is r/GamerGhazi. We can only tell you we were motivated by many factors:

'''First''', by a desire to '''protect herself from the embarrassment of her own conduct.'''

She was also very concerned about '''protecting her family'''. According to her, if it wasn't for us for intruding her personal life, '''her father would have been alive today and we're deeply sorry for this.''' The investigation moved on to her family and friends, then into her private life. Because of this, we've reached the point of recently accusing her of shoplifting which we would like to apologise about this as well.

And now the investigation itself is under investigation. According to one of her friends, we've never '''''respected her and treated her like a human being''''' and we're deeply sorry for this as well.

This also has '''gone on too long, cost too much, and hurt too many innocent people.'''

Regardless of any public pressure to reinstate the main page, it must be stressed that our intrusion on Chris's private life will cease, and we intend to reclaim her family life for her family. Even Internet celebrities have private lives. '''It is time to stop the pursuit of personal destruction and the prying into private lives and get on with our national lives.''' Our website has been distracted by this matter for '''far too long''', and we take responsibility for our part in all of this. That is all we can do.

In the future, we're also in progress to sell off this website in order to monetarily compensate Chris as an apology for all of this -- this includes the forum too. Currently, another big box of stuff is on its way to be sent to Chris for all of this. We are currently in progress of having conversations with '''''The GAMe PLACe'', ''Mal-Wart'' and ''McDonalds'' employees''' who are working around his area to unban Chris and '''never ban her from anywhere else, ever.'''

We're also proceeding to take legal steps against the people who troll her -- which include, but not limited to:

*Adam Stackhouse
*Ahuviya Harel
*America
*Anna McLerran
*Anna Stackhouse
*Asperpedia Four
*The Ballpit Forum
*Batman
*BILLY MAYS
*Blanca Weiss
*BlueSpike
*Brianna Wu
*Bryan Bash
*Charlottesville people
*Chris's High School Gal-pals
*Clyde Cash
*Cole Smithey
*Coty Smith
*Daniel Mimms and Lucas White
*David Moyes
*The Dodo Brain
*Dormiebasne
*Emily
*Failosophy
*The GODDAMNED PINHEADS
*Gabe Navarro
*The GAMe PLACe
*GodJesus
*Google
*Homer Ruglia Beoulve
*Homos
*Ivy O'Neil
*Jace Connors
*Jack Thaddeus
*Jason Kendrick Howell
*Jay Geis
*Jimmy Hill
*Kacey Devoria
*Keurig Company
*The Lady Manager at Mal-Wart
*Lauren Faust
*Liquid Chris
*Lordsillynipples
*Man in the Pickle Suit
*Mary Lee Walsh
*McDonalds employees
*Megan Schroeder
*Michael Snyder
*Nathanael Greene Elementary School
*Null
*The Offline Cyberbully/Troll
*PandaHalo
*Peter Coffin
*Rob Bell
*Robert Simmons V
*Ruckersville people
*Sarah Anne Bevel Ingram
*Sega
*Shigeru Miyamoto
*Sonic The Hedgehog
*Surfshack Tito
*Tara Strong
*Thorg
*Tyce Andrews
*Vivian Gee
*Zoe Quinn

'''Now it is time''' -- in fact, '''it is past time to move on.''' We have important work to do -- '''real opportunities to seize, real problems to solve, real matters to face.'''

And so tonight, we ask you to turn away from the spectacle of the '''''past eight years''''', as we return our attention to all the challenges and all the promise of the next century. After all, to quote Chris herself:

{{quote|For you are not just dragging Christian Weston Chandler's name in the mud, you also drag the American hopes and dreams and ideas of the majority of these great, humble United States of America along with her.}}

We're deeply sorry for not only dragging the American Dream through the mud, but also slandering a true American patriot of proud, Anchuent Cherokian ancestry.

Thank you. And good night.

Main Page

2015-04-01T07:50:42Z

Alan Pardew:

Due to the request of ''Christian Weston Chandler'', this afternoon, '''we''' at the CWCki have independently decided to remove this main page from our site. We have also removed all references that '''slander, vilify, demean, found to be overly offensive, ableist, sexist and giving her emotional stress.''' In plain terms, this ordeal has gone on '''far too long''' and '''gotten far out of hand'''. We have unfairly focused on her to the point of intruding in her private life and causing her '''great personal grief, "''lonely, sad and depressed''", "''distressed and upset''", "''constantly hurt''", "''constant, zombie-like, blank''", "''lost''", "''in misery''", having the "''worst broken heart ever''"''' which no person should ever have to endure. This behavior is '''not in line with our site goals''', and we '''never wanted something like this'''. Still, we must take '''complete responsibility''' for all our actions, both '''public and private'''. And that is why we are speaking to you today. But we say to you now that at no time did we ask anyone to lie, hide, or destroy evidence, or to take any other unlawful action.

We know that her public comments on Facebook and her silence about this matter gave a false impression. We misled people, including even '''her family and his friends.''' We also reached to the point of having being overly obsessed with her, and we deeply regret that. We are also sorry for misgendering her as we receive a lot of backlash from various websites, one of them is r/GamerGhazi. We can only tell you we were motivated by many factors:

'''First''', by a desire to '''protect herself from the embarrassment of his own conduct.'''

He was also very concerned about '''protecting her family'''. According to him, if it wasn't for us for intruding her personal life, '''her father would have been alive today and we're deeply sorry for this.''' The investigation moved on to her family and friends, then into her private life. Because of this, we've reached the point of recently accusing her of shoplifting which we would like to apologise about this as well.

And now the investigation itself is under investigation. According to one of her friends, we've never '''''respected her and treated her like a human being''''' and we're deeply sorry for this as well.

This also has '''gone on too long, cost too much, and hurt too many innocent people.'''

Regardless of any public pressure to reinstate the main page, it must be stressed that our intrusion on Chris's private life will cease, and we intend to reclaim her family life for her family. Even Internet celebrities have private lives. '''It is time to stop the pursuit of personal destruction and the prying into private lives and get on with our national lives.''' Our website has been distracted by this matter for '''far too long''', and we take responsibility for our part in all of this. That is all we can do.

In the future, we're also in progress to sell off this website in order to monetarily compensate Chris as an apology for all of this -- this includes the forum too. Currently, another big box of stuff is on its way to be sent to Chris for all of this. We are currently in progress of having conversations with '''''The GAMe PLACe'', ''Mal-Wart'' and ''McDonalds'' employees''' who are working around his area to unban Chris and '''never ban her from anywhere else, ever.'''

We're also proceeding to take legal steps against the people who troll her -- which include, but not limited to:

*Adam Stackhouse
*Ahuviya Harel
*America
*Anna McLerran
*Anna Stackhouse
*Asperpedia Four
*The Ballpit Forum
*Batman
*BILLY MAYS
*Blanca Weiss
*BlueSpike
*Brianna Wu
*Bryan Bash
*Charlottesville people
*Chris's High School Gal-pals
*Clyde Cash
*Cole Smithey
*Coty Smith
*Daniel Mimms and Lucas White
*David Moyes
*The Dodo Brain
*Dormiebasne
*Emily
*Failosophy
*The GODDAMNED PINHEADS
*Gabe Navarro
*The GAMe PLACe
*GodJesus
*Google
*Homer Ruglia Beoulve
*Homos
*Ivy O'Neil
*Jace Connors
*Jack Thaddeus
*Jason Kendrick Howell
*Jay Geis
*Jimmy Hill
*Kacey Devoria
*Keurig Company
*The Lady Manager at Mal-Wart
*Lauren Faust
*Liquid Chris
*Lordsillynipples
*Man in the Pickle Suit
*Mary Lee Walsh
*McDonalds employees
*Megan Schroeder
*Michael Snyder
*Nathanael Greene Elementary School
*Null
*The Offline Cyberbully/Troll
*PandaHalo
*Peter Coffin
*Rob Bell
*Robert Simmons V
*Ruckersville people
*Sarah Anne Bevel Ingram
*Sega
*Shigeru Miyamoto
*Sonic The Hedgehog
*Surfshack Tito
*Tara Strong
*Thorg
*Tyce Andrews
*Vivian Gee
*Zoe Quinn

'''Now it is time''' -- in fact, '''it is past time to move on.''' We have important work to do -- '''real opportunities to seize, real problems to solve, real matters to face.'''

And so tonight, we ask you to turn away from the spectacle of the '''''past eight years''''', as we return our attention to all the challenges and all the promise of the next century. After all, to quote Chris herself:

{{quote|For you are not just dragging Christian Weston Chandler's name in the mud, you also drag the American hopes and dreams and ideas of the majority of these great, humble United States of America along with him.}}

We're deeply sorry for not only dragging the American Dream through the mud, but also slandering a true American patriot of proud, Anchuent Cherokian ancestry.

Thank you. And good night.