CWCki - User contributions [en]

Jacob Sockness

2025-07-08T23:16:58Z

Anemichu:

{{Needs Updating|[[The Place chats - Chris Unblocks Sockness]]|Information regarding Discord Server}}
{{Honest}}
{{Autistic}}

{{quote|The Sacred Shoes have samples of cat & doggy DNA. Looking for the Treasures of Heaven, a single hair from Christine's head to put into an amulet of serious power to manifest one's dreams. This is a divine experience.|Sockness after buying Chris's shoes.<ref><s>https://twitter.com/darkseed2012/status/1107477177149251585</s> Deleted</ref>}}

{{quote|Stop with the sex obsessions already! Seriously, Please: chill out.|Chris, 1 July 2020, criticizing Sockness for his creepy behavior after over a year of it.<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1278236917952327682</ref>}}

{{Infobox Person
| name = Jacob Sockness
| image = SocknessCWC.jpg|size=250px
|aliases = Michiro Hutaki Agian Siin Darkseed2012 RamleIronHeart Jacob JS drunkendragon415 luvshak214 Ashva Gohda Gakuto Numata White Knight Blue Heart Jake Hammer <abbr title="'Love Christine' in Hindi">क्रिस्टीन को प्यार करो</abbr> Centralized Imperial Government of Kidasuna [[Hyperdimension Neptunia|CPU God]] of the Super Nintendo Right Eye of GOD Fanta-Fun GOD the All Father
|gender = <abbr title="Natural. Claims to be neuter.">Male</abbr>
|nation = [[United States|American]]
|race = White
|religion = Neo-Pagan Satanism (former)
|occupation = Amateur Occultist Conspiracy Theorist Stalker Unemployed
|saga = {{saga|jacob|cn}}, {{saga|arbitarch|cn}}, {{saga|shipfic|cn}}, {{saga|everfree|cn}}, {{saga|jail|cn}}, {{saga|thirdexile|cn}}
}}

'''Jacob Sockness''' is an intellectually-disabled amateur sorcerer and conspiracy theorist from San Francisco, California who attempted to [[manipulate]] Chris into a relationship, notably by exploiting his fantasy world and tricking Chris into believing his [[imaginary friend]] approved of the idea.<ref>[[Sockness impersonates Magi-Chan]]</ref> Prior to Sockness's interactions, the [[Idea Guys]] had [[brainwashed]] Chris into identifying as [[bisexual]], which enabled Sockness to try to become Chris's first (real-world) male sweetheart, which ultimately failed.

Sockness emerged in mid-[[2018]] and was most active between [[July 2019|July]] and [[November 2019|November]] of [[2019]]. He has the dubious honor of embodying every single aspect of the [[Unholy Quintet]] over the course of his years of interacting with Chris. He has similarities with Chris, such as being [[autism|autistic]],<ref>[https://old.reddit.com/r/TheChurchofCWC/comments/bl78bl/magichan_2_need_to_talk_now/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app Sockness admits he is autistic],</ref> [[tomgirl|non-gender-conforming]],<ref name=return /> receiving a [[monthly tugboat]], [[Chris and religion#Delusions of godhood|believing to be a god]],<ref>[http://archive.is/eg2Gq Sockness claimed to be the Hindu god Ganesh]</ref> thinks he has [[curse-ye-ha-me-ha|magic powers]] and has built an elaborate fantasy universe, into which he has appropriated ''Sonichu'' characters, with over a dozen installments that he believes [[Chris and reality|really exist]].<ref>[http://www.lulu.com/shop/search.ep?contributorId=1404026 Sockness's 19-volume series for sale on Lulu]</ref> While he was at first seemingly just another [[troll]], notable for his [[Chris and sex|erotic]] disposition towards Chris, Sockness became openly malicious after establishing direct contact with Chris.

In mid-[[2019]], Sockness gained influence over Chris by offering to work together financially following Chris's [[June 2019]] ban from [[eBay]], he then achieved considerable influence over Chris's [[CWCville|fantasy world]], as seen in [[Sonichu 14|''Sonichu'' #14]]. Most of his courting and [[enablers|enabling]] has been through Twitter, though he has also promoted himself through [[Reddit]], [[YouTube]] and even [[Kiwi Farms]]. For months, Sockness tried to manipulate Chris into meeting in person, to onlookers' alarm. Yet when Sockness finally set out to travel cross-country to [[14 Branchland Court]] in late September 2019, Chris rebuffed these efforts with the help of the [[Watchmen]]. Rehabilitation attempts over the following two months, at one point going even so far as manipulating Chris into mutual [[sweetheart|flirting]], could not ultimately repair their [[Heart Level|broken relationship]], and by the end of [[November 2019]] they rejected each other again. Sockness was nevertheless persistent, and by [[March 2020]] briefly had a toe in Chris's door once again. Chris and Jacob's relationship came to a permanent end in [[August 2020]] after Jacob claimed that [[Mia Hamm]] had a child with Chris.<ref>[[July 2020 social media posts#Jacob sex obsessions]]</ref>

==Discovery and motivations==
[[Image:Jacob Sockness CWC poster.jpg|200px|left|thumb|Sockness posing next to a Sonichu Through the Years poster sold by Chris.]]
Jacob was discovered by chance by [[Kiwi Farms]] user [https://kiwifarms.net/members/neural.18444/ neural] while observing the [[weens|many]] [[A-log|users]] surrounding Chris's Twitter posts. Upon further investigation, it was revealed that he also had a Kiwi Farms account under the name [https://kiwifarms.net/members/jacob-js.26961/ Jacob JS]. It was in his profile page where he accidentally doxed himself by linking to his [[Facebook]] and Tumblr that revealed his personal information. As he exposed himself on the Farms, Sockness, like [[Michael Hirtes]], is considered to be a ''halal'' lolcow.

Like many of Chris's orbiters, Sockness is a furry and lives in [[wikipedia:Section_8_%28housing%29|subsidised housing]] with a [[tugboat]]. He has a very low view of [[niggos|blacks]], describing them as 'beastly' and 'hyper sexual', believing that 'their race can only rape, because that is [their] way of reproduction in a natural setting.'<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/jacob-sockness-michiro-hutaki-agian-siin-jacob-js-darkseed2012-ramleironheart.48287/ Sockness's lolcow thread on Kiwi Farms]</ref> Unlike the [[Idea Guys]] who inserted such themes into Chris's mind for their own amusement, Jacob seems to be genuine. Sockness has been demonstrated to control several sockpuppets that he has used to white-knight and converse with himself; like Chris's [[Disguises|similar past attempts]] to cover himself.

Christorians could not discern the true motivations behind Sockness's behaviour. For a while, Jacob appeared to be the first [[TRUE and HONEST]] believer in [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] and the [[Dimensional Merge]] after Chris, setting him apart from the [[Jessica Quinn|various]] [[CWCProtectSquad|trolls]] professing to protect Chris and the [[Sarah and Steve|many]] [[Future message from Crystal W Chandler|previous]] [[Multidimensional White Knights|imitators]] of the [[Idea Guys]] pretending to belong to Chris's abortive [[Chris and his Ego|cult]]. Over the months, evidence gradually came to light that indicated that Jacob's feelings were not in earnest. In [[November 2018]], Sockness admitted that he did not seriously believe in the [[Dimensional Merge]].<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FhV7At8N4x4&t=274s Interview with Sockness on YouTube, conducted 18 November 2018, released 29 October 2019]</ref> When Chris allowed Jacob access to his Twitter account on 11 July 2019, he boasted about it on [[Reddit]], even claiming that his sexual attraction to Chris was a façade.<ref>[[:File:KinkAct.png|Sockness states his erotic desires for Chris are not genuine, 11 July 2019]]</ref> On 21 September 2019, when a [[white knight|concerned onlooker]] tried to warn Chris that Sockness was tantamount to an autistic [[Idea Guy]], Sockness embraced the charges of manipulation, justifying his actions as protecting Chris from trolls.<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/8-15-sockness-enabling-chriss-magi-chan-role-playing-luring-him-for-a-visit.59770/post-5361506 Dialogue between Sockness and onlooker]</ref>

== Early interactions with Chris==
{{quote|The Sacred Shoes have samples of cat & doggy DNA. Looking for the Treasures of Heaven, a single hair from Christine's head to put into an amulet of serious power to manifest one's dreams. This is a divine experience.|Sockness<ref><s>https://twitter.com/darkseed2012/status/1107477177149251585</s> Deleted</ref>}}

Sockness has spent hundreds buying items from Chris's [[eBay]], notably buying his old shoes for worshipping purposes. Chris blocked him on [[Twitter]] on 31 January 2019. By 22 [[May 2019]], Jacob's YouTube channel was terminated, and his Twitter account disappeared.

[[File:JacobBlockedLOL.png|thumb|left|200px|Jacob's reaction to Chris blocking his [[sockpuppet]].]]

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = I have the Sonishoes
| video = {{#ev:youtube|AYIzRYW3uDc}}
| Stardate = 16 March 2019
| Maker = Jacob S
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}

[[Image:Followed.png|200px|right]]
[[Image:KinkAct.png|200px|right]]
Still, this was not the end of Sockness's involvement with Chris; Jacob then created a new Twitter account named "Chris Kink." On 11 July 2019, while Chris was trying to raise funds for a hotel room at the 2019 [[BronyCon]], a troll SonichuMerch told Chris that Sockness might be interested in buying his bath water. Chris saw dollar signs and followed Sockness.

{{quote|The Sonichu merch guy told Chris I was interested in the buying some bath water. The guy doesn't know I have no money to buy it due to issues with Social Security in May. Even if I had the money, Chris has to follow some exact rules to creating what I need from him. I need him to make and bless some holy water with his juices in it.|Sockness explains why Chris started following him.<ref>https://www.reddit.com/r/ChrisChanSonichu/comments/cbmq7m/chris_is_following_sockness_on_twitter/ethqxsd/</ref>}}

After establishing direct communication with Chris, Sockness tweeted that he would open a vendor account on [[eBay]] for Chris, acting as warehouse, clearing-house and middleman. Chris responded with gratitude.<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-7-14-chris-will-circumvent-his-ebay-seller-ban-by-teaming-up-with-sockness.58419/ Twitter 7/14 - Chris will circumvent his Ebay seller ban by teaming up with Sockness]</ref> The next day, Chris re-tweeted a GoFundMe campaign by Sockness to raise $300, nominally as a ''shipping fund''.<ref>http://archive.fo/nkTcS</ref> As of [[September 2019]], Sockness has failed to restore Chris's access to eBay, which would have been prohibited at any rate. Sockness has continued to set up GoFundMe pages for [[Chris and money|Chris's incidental expenses]], such as when [[Son-chu|his car]] broke down and needed a thousand dollars worth of repairs.<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts#Car is repaired but Chris needs cash (again)]]</ref>

[[File:JacobWhiteKnight.jpg|thumb|200px|left|White Knight Blue Heart, Sockness's primary Twitter identity while planning to travel to Chris's home.]]
[[File:Sonichu14-2019draft-p15.jpg|thumb|200px|Jakoba in [[Sonichu 14|''Sonichu'' #14]].]]

Once Sockness had his foot in the door, he began talking about his alternate dimension fantasies, further enabling Chris.

{{quote|Firstly, and mainly, I am not under Anyone’s Control. And second, I still support the Rokat and all the good peoples in Andromeda. I need to meditate further for more sound responses and thoughts. For now I will simply state that your research is valuable, indeed. Going silent.|Chris, addressing Sockness. He believes he is not under anyone's control while parroting Sockness's lore.<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1154376923520352256</ref>}}

Chris featured Jakoba, an OC created by Sockness, in [[Sonichu 14|''Sonichu'' #14]]. As Sockness put it: "She drew Jakoba, from one of mine when her CPU pals wanted to see the Rokat".<ref>https://www.reddit.com/r/ChrisChanSonichu/comments/cgybzh/chris_drawing_with_his_awkward_pen_grip_while/euxv3zz/</ref> For most of summer 2019, the two interacted relatively little, though other [[weens]] tried to push them closer together.<ref>[[Sarah and Steve]]</ref> In [[August 2019]], Chris, through his [[Magi-Chan]] sockpuppet on Twitter, [[naïve]]ly dismissed Sockness's violent inclinations and approved of Sockness coming to visit.<ref>[[August 2019 social media posts#Magi-Chan responds to Sockness' violent tendencies]]</ref>

== Subsequent interactions and Virginia trip ==
[[File:Socknesstraininfo.jpg|thumb|right|250px|Sockness's ominously one-way train ticket, with dates blacked out. Astute observers have calculated that Sockness should have arrived on Saturday evening (28 September 2019) in [[Charlottesville]] had he continued.]]

On 7 [[September 2019]], Sockness released a [[Sockness impersonates Magi-Chan|fabricated conversation]] between himself and [[Magi-Chan]] from [[May 2019]], in which he declared that he and Chris would need meet in person and marry for the [[Dimensional Merge]] to proceed. Though Chris affirmed thereafter that the counterfeit dialogue was [[TRUE and HONEST|trustworthy]] and [[Financhu Crisis|begged]] for the funding to travel to California,<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/sockness-manipulated-chris-with-threat-to-stop-the-merge-rping-as-magi-chan.60642/post-5298762</ref> he changed tactics within a few days, stating on Twitter that Chris, [[Chris and reality|in Magi-Chan's body]], had arrived on the West Coast from "behind the [[dimension]]al curtain",<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts#Longing for the Teen Troon Saga]]</ref> while Chris's body was safely in [[Virginia]]. Nevertheless, Chris remained interested in Sockness coming to visit him at [[14 Branchland Court|home]].<ref>[[Psychic California Trip]]</ref>

As autumn 2019 began, months of casual online role-playing came to a head: on 24 September, Sockness reported that he had bought train tickets to make the transcontinental trip to Chris.<ref>[https://archive.fo/vS8ac Sockness announces he has secured transport on Reddit]</ref> He made clear that his intent was both [[Chris and sex|sexual]] and [[Chris and violence|violent]] on Reddit, comparing his plans for Chris's rear to Germany's devastation by Allied bombings during [[Manchester High Leaks#Japan War Essay|the War]],<ref>[http://archive.is/kGTRi Sockness: 'I'll just destroy her ass like carpeting bombing Germany in WWII. It'll be in flaming ruin.']</ref> despite being physically incapable of such a feat.<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/post-5643632 Sockness reveals incapacity to rape Chris, 27 November 2019]</ref>

[[File:Discord - 25Sept19 - Welfare Check claim.png|thumb|150px|Claim from an anonymous Discord user that a [[welfare check]] was requested.]]
On 25 September, a concerned observer called police for a [[welfare check]] on Chris, and claimed that a deputy promised to contact Chris that day and follow up on 28 September.<ref>https://cwcki.club/index.php?threads/sockness-foiled-virginia-trip-what-really-happened.2424/</ref> Whether the alleged welfare check had an effect on Chris is uncertain.

On 25 September, Chris posted a statement on Twitter along with a short audio clip, [[ChrisReleasesAStatementRegardingJacobSockness]], indicating his desire for Sockness to return home after Sockness had left for Virginia, and saying that somebody in Chicago would provide him with a return ticket.<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-9-26-chris-sees-red-flags-about-sockness-cancels-his-visit.61648/post-5384612 Chris declares Sockness's destiny is to go home, asks his followers to stop him in Chicago]</ref> It seemed that Chris had a moment of clarity long enough to realize the magnitude of what was going to happen. He elaborated on his decisions a day later, including a statement from one of Jacob's imaginary gods, Michiro. In his statement, Chris cited [[Chris and health|his health]] as unconducive to having guests, and that Jacob had gone down the path of evil. Chris also said that he foresaw that he and Jacob would end up in a similar situation to how Chris and [[Cole Smithey]] are. On 26 September, Sockness admitted defeat, tweeting that his "involvement with the Dimensional Merge has ended in failure" and that he would delete his Twitter account upon returning home.<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-9-26-chris-sees-red-flags-about-sockness-cancels-his-visit.61648/page-6#post-5384295 Sockness quits, tweet screenshot mirrored on Kiwi Farms]</ref> Chris confirmed that Sockness had turned back the next day.<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts#Sockness is going home]]</ref> In a [[honor roll|poorly thought out]] attempt to save face, Sockness later claimed that the train ticket was his own forgery, and that the entire Virginia trip a sham.<ref name=hoax>[[:File:SockHoax.jpg|Tweet by Sockness, 16 October 2019]]</ref>

== Failed romance ==
[[File:BarneySatanism.jpeg|thumb|left|200px|The rift between Jacob and Chris continued to widen on 28 September 2019, when Chris refused to join in Sockness's worship of [[Wikipedia:Barney & Friends|Barney]], whom Jacob believes to be Satan.]]
[[File:Sockness managing Chris's Patreon.jpeg|thumb|200px|Sockness handling Chris's Patreon funding, as he did with eBay earlier in the year.]]
Despite spending over $1,500 through the course of his failed bid for Chris's attention, Sockness remained determined to win his prize in the end, and managed to slither back into Chris's inner circle of orbiters despite his dangerous behaviour. He apologised for his [[Chris and anger|emotional outbursts]] to reconcile with Chris, and had indicated that he wishes to try visiting Chris again at some indeterminate future time, making sure to bring a mutual friend along with him.<ref>[[:File:SocknessPlans.png]]</ref> When Chris declared on 28 September his wish to attend BABSCon, a ''My Little Pony'' convention then scheduled for April 2020 just outside of San Francisco, Sockness consoled himself that he would see Chris in person after all.<ref>[http://archive.is/j8eth Sockness's Twitter, archived 30 September 2019]</ref> However, they did not converse again for over two weeks after this.
[[File:TruePals.png|thumb|200px|left|Sarah and Steve declare themselves outright to favour Sockness with this original artwork.]]
Halfway through October 2019, Sockness entered the picture again. On 12 October, Chris whined on Twitter about complaints from customers regarding the [[Patreon]] books they had not received.<ref>[[October 2019 social media posts#Chris orders the Shipfic cards, snaps at customers wanting books]]</ref> Sockness, sensing an opportunity to regain access to Chris, discussed the matter with him, and then announced with his approval<ref>[[October 2019 social media posts#Good News to Patient Patrons (Patreon post)]]</ref> that he would be taking over management of the Patreon's financing, ostensibly to help, in a similar move to his managing Chris's eBay several months earlier. Emboldened, Sockness proclaimed on 16 October that he would fly to Virginia sometime about [[Halloween]].<ref name=hoax /> He promptly resumed hitting on Chris over Twitter, with Chris playing into it: on 19 October, Sockness, commenting on a video clip of cosplayers kissing, said: "How about it Love @CPU_CWCSonichu?", to which Chris answered, "I’m not gonna cosplay as Deadpool or a Zombie, but we can kiss at the future time."<ref name=cankiss>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1185683452282261505</ref> Halloween 2019 came and went with no indication that Sockness had flown to Virginia as he said he would.

Shifting tactics, Sockness determined to cordon Chris off from other social interactions, establishing himself as the only one Chris could trust. On 3 [[November 2019]] he managed to sour Chris's opinion of [[Null]].<ref>[[Null#Chris turns against Null]]</ref> Later that week, Sockness allied with a newly returned [[Sarah and Steve]] in byzantine Twitter dialogues ''defending'' Chris against other enablers who sought to gain influence over him.<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-11-3-sockness-manipulating-chris-to-trust-only-him-chris-turns-against-null.62825/post-5562273 Peak autism, 8 November 2019]</ref> Among his many attempts to suppress rivals, Sockness harassed MKRNightVee in direct messages.<ref name=screech>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/post-5646079 Merge table talk, 27 November 2019]</ref> Further seeking to cut Chris off from other contacts, including those who [[Guard Dogs|genuinely mean him well]], Sockness created a list of various [[Kiwi Farms]] and [[Twitter]] users he deemed untrustworthy for criticising his bid for control.<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-11-3-sockness-manipulating-chris-to-trust-only-him-chris-turns-against-null.62825/post-5576554 Sockness's Black Book, 11 November 2019]</ref>

== Jacob as a danger to Chris ==
Jacob is clearly unstable, with psychopathic tendencies. In his own mythos he is the prophet of the god of war and death, Jakoba, it is telling that Jacob named a death god after himself. His books contain many references to himself as an evil entity, most bluntly put in Celestial Studies where he says "Our job is to consume human flesh." In addition to this a lot of his books contain rituals, most have graphic descriptions, all of which are made to kill people in cruel and unusual ways. In a 2018 interview he says that he uses these rituals to kill homeless people when he's bored. Also in that interview he says in no uncertain terms that he would rape Chris if his advances are refused. It is unclear if what he says really happens, what matters is that Jacob thinks that he's killing the homeless and summoning daemons which is just as bad. Chris tries to hand wave these glaring faults in Jacob's online persona by saying that everything bad Jacob has done, he did because he was possessed by Jakoba. Despite Jacob saying that it is impossible for Jakoba to possess him. Jacob claims that Jakoba is responsible for the "red tape" preventing the [[Merge]], and tries to hold it hostage claiming it will only happen once he has had sex with Chris or they sacrifice a small child. Although it is not known for certain what would happen if Jacob and Chris met, it would certainly not be good.

===Friendzoning and second estrangement===
{{quote|I was following the request of Magi-Chan to keep on with Jacob, yet my feelings for him have developed, during the months. As for the present, I had to cool the romance, because even I Knew the whole time it was not meant to be, and Jacob's usefulness had become compromised.|Chris explaining his reasons for involving himself with Sockness to a random [[ween]]<ref name=aqua>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/post-5653000 Chris blames Magi-Chan for Sockness, 30 November 2019]</ref>}}
Pressuring Chris to abandon his other contacts ultimately backfired. Chris received the list itself lukewarmly: while he affirmed that he was in [[Love Quest|love]] with Sockness, he still maintained some reservations.<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-11-3-sockness-manipulating-chris-to-trust-only-him-chris-turns-against-null.62825/post-5574329 Chris endorses Sockness against MKR, 11 November 2019]</ref> He challenged Sockness, noting that the list consisted mostly of Sockness's own enemies and asking whether he would be blacklisted also were he to turn on him.<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-11-3-sockness-manipulating-chris-to-trust-only-him-chris-turns-against-null.62825/post-5578153 Chris's challenge for Sockness, 11 November 2019]</ref> Sockness went on to defeat the various pretenders to his position without much fanfare, though in vain: Chris was repulsed by Sockness's professed associations with demons, and issued a statement on 28 November 2019 that he was not in a romantic relationship with him, and moreover that the Dimensional Merge would be endangered if such intimacy were to occur.<ref>[http://archive.is/FVISg Chris rejects Sockness's overtures, 28 November 2019]</ref> His decision was applauded by other enablers, some of whom had become Jacob's targets. Nonetheless, Chris still counted Sockness as a friend, and thought of himself as protecting him against demons.<ref name=screech />

As had come to pass two months earlier, when Chris disrupted his journey to Virginia, Sockness responded to the word that he had been rejected with [[tard rage]]. He delivered an [[Chris and negotiation|ultimatum]] to Chris, threatening to revoke his tacit permission to use his fictional setting in ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' and pursue him for [[Things Chris has ripped off|copyright infringement]] if he continued to use them, unless they got married.<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/11-29-sockness-takes-his-ball-and-goes-home.63588/post-5650528 Sockness turns on Chris, 29 November 2019]</ref> While Chris agreed [[Stress|apathetically]] no longer to use Jacob's demonic characters in his own works, he displayed in an autistic Parthian shot his usual [[honor roll|comprehension level]] of how [[Chris and copyright|intellectual property]] works: Chris's own experiences and memories of Jacob's [[dimensions|fictional universe]] were inviolable. Sockness remained adamant, sternly reiterating the [[Chris and the law|legal limits]] on what Chris could do [[Chris and money|financially]] with his characters in an endeavour to bring him back into his flabby arms. Holding firm, Chris stolidly divested himself of him by writing off their past business together as being at [[Magi-Chan]]'s request and describing Sockness as having outlived his usefulness.<ref name=aqua /> The two did not speak each other for over three weeks, and their friendship was dealt a hard blow.

[[December 2019]] saw Chris's relations with Sockness continue to sour. On 15 December 2019 Chris requested Sockness be removed from [[The Place]] as he had noticed he was still in the members list.<ref>[[The Place chats - Jacob Sockness#Chris asks for Jacob to be kicked]]</ref> Defying Sockness's order not to use his fantasy world, on 16 December 2019 Chris released [[Twilight Sparkle's Secret Shipfic Folder|trading card]], declaring that his final triumph over Jacob and his infernal horde was assured.<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/post-5727293 Chris commemorates his victory, 16 December 2019]</ref> Later that month, Sockness sought to spark conflict between Chris and [[Other enablers#MKRNightVee|an enabler]], but Chris recognised and dismissed these as the fabrications they were.<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/post-5755364 Sockness denounced as forger, 22 December 2019]</ref> On 23 December 2019, [[Marvin]] blocked Sockness's Twitter account. Sockness then angrily texted Chris to confront him over the block, but Chris decided to ignore him.<ref>[[The Place chats - Jacob Sockness#Marvin blocks Sockness, fated Pokemon card]]</ref> Even Jacob's plan to confront Chris again at BABScon was derailed: the convention was cancelled in [[March 2020]] due to the risk of [[COVID-19]].<ref>[https://www.babscon.com/2020/ BABScon 2020 is cancelled due to SARS 2 outbreak, 18 March 2020].</ref> Unlike the [[List of beliefs brainwashed into Chris|deep scars]] left to the ''Sonichu'' canon by the Idea Guys, Sockness's contributions, if not rejected outright, seemed to have been turned on their head and made impotent to warp Chris's thought any more than it [[Chris and reality|already is]]. For once, it appeared that Chris had actually managed to evade one of his malicious orbiters.

==Brief Reemergence==

{{quote|No. At least, not yet.|Chris, 15 July 2020, to a fan asking whether he and Sockness are dating.<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1282966598911815680</ref>}}
Though Sockness had managed to make a reappearance in early 2020 and had attempted to get his foot in the door, it wasn't until Summer 2020 when Chris finally started humouring him in public again. Even so, Chris became increasingly dissatisfied with some of Sockness's behaviour, openly rebuking him over [[Twitter]].

{{Quote|Therefore, all of your information is false, and, once again, you can shut the hell up about this bull shit. End of discussion. ⚡⚡⚡|<s>Chris</s> Sonichu, rebuking Sockness over Twitter over his creepy behaviour and attempts at manipulation.<ref>[[July 2020 social media posts#Jacob sex obsessions]]</ref>}}

[[File:14BCFloorplan.png|thumb|150px|The supposed "proof" Jacob gave for visiting 14BLC.]]

As a result of Sockness's secretive behaviour, much of what he has done with regards to attempting to get his foot back in the door with Chris can only be ascertained from Chris's comments and retweets on Sockness's posts; in early July 2020, Chris rebuked Sockness while [[Spirit possession|playing as]] [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] for his creepy behaviour, and then told him in no uncertain terms to 'shut the hell up' when Sockness attempted to trick him into believing he had a 10 year old illegitimate son, born from his fling with the prostitute [[Mia Hamm]]. Even though Chris remained under Sockness's thrall, still believing other enabler-forced events to be true in the same breath, it was clear that once again, he managed to discern reality from fiction for just long enough to shoot down Sockness's misbehavior, if only for a few moments. With the cancellation of [[BABSCon]] due to [[COVID-19]], he claimed to have caused storms over China for stopping his plan to "meet the goddess."

==Second Blocking Onwards==
In [[August 2020]], Chris got in yet another [[Twitter]] spat with [[Ben Saint]]. This time, Sockness decided to butt in and add his own flavor of idiocy to the slapfight. This proved to be the last straw for Chris, who called Jacob out once more before blocking him. Afterwards, this turned Sockness off on Chris for good as he later posted occasional rants against Chris on his Twitter and his personal Subreddit, attacking Chris for his opposition to [[Pmurt]], who Jacob supports with a religious fervor, and coming up with plans to disrupt the [[Dimensional Merge]]. However, Sockness eventually cycled back into displaying his affection to Chris in a vain attempt to win back his heart. Sockness continued to try to and worm his way back into Chris’s life, but with his public Twitter account being suspended on [[January 2021]] and Chris deciding not to respond to his tweets and texts, no progress was ever made.

[[File:Sockness comic death.jpg|thumb|left|200px|[[Helena]] clarifies why Chris considers Sockness dead.]]

In [[June 2021]], Chris made a social media post naming Jacob as being among the five most negatively impactful people in his life,<ref>[[June_2021_social_media_posts#Discussing_trolls_and_other_stuff]]</ref> casting severe doubt on the likelihood of any potential reconciliation between the two.

During [[August 2021]], as the fallout of the [[Incest call]] being leaked was occurring, Jacob responded to a Reddit thread asking about what he thought of the situation, stating that he no longer wanted to be involved with Chris, and that he was glad that the [[September 2019]] train trip failed.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/jacob-sockness-michiro-hutaki-agian-siin-jacob-js-darkseed2012-ramleironheart.48287/page-96#post-9585377</ref> A few weeks later, Jacob made a video to spread a rumor that a member of [[Praetor]] was responsible for Chris having sex with Barbara.<ref>https://www.bitchute.com/video/SdSo0OsJhNcL/</ref> Since then, Jacob has been periodically swinging between wanting to bang Chris once again, to hating his guts and wanting to replace him in his demented pantheon.

== Third trolling cycle ==
[[File:IMG 5542.png|thumb|left|200px|Sockness sends Chris a photo of his ass.]]
[[File:Socknesssightingmay.png|thumb|200px|A Christorian meets Sockness in person.]]

Any newfound optimism onlookers might have found in Chris's ability to discern his [[enablers]]' true intent turned out to be misguided. Through early [[2020]], Chris had fallen further into [[Mysticism|occult]] practises. On 31 [[March 2020]], Chris built a pagan altar in his bedroom according to instructions found in one of Sockness's books.<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/post-6224799 Chris's altar, 31 March 2020]</ref><ref>[https://twitter.com/JSockess/status/1245166234393444352 Sockness affirms the altar is after his model]</ref> Soon thereafter, on 6 [[April 2020]], Chris followed Jacob again on [[Twitter]].<ref name=return>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/post-6251631 Sockness returns to Chris's interest, 6 April 2020]</ref> What precisely Sockness was doing at this time is unknown, as he restricted public access to his Twitter account on 19 April.<ref>[https://archive.li/V2QxB Sockness's restricted profile, 19 April 2020]</ref>

Jacob also declared that he would attempt to attend the brony convention [[Everfree Northwest]] in disguise the following year.<ref>{{Cite Reddit|subreddit=Kidasuna|title= Going to Ever Free|username=[[Jacob Sockness|luvshak214]]|post=ocsgyf/going_to_ever_free|archive=https://archive.fo/dcP2u}}</ref> In response, Chris asked [[Bella]] to act as a bodyguard.<ref>[[Bella chats#The Selected Few]]</ref> According to a conversation between Bella and [[Fiona]], Chris had told them all about Sockness, prompting Fiona to declare him as the "worst of A-logs".<ref name = "chess">[[Chess Group 15 Chats#Sockness]]</ref> Jacob continued to post about Chris, even during [[Jail Saga|his arrest in jail]], writing a letter to him in jail, which he claimed he would only post on an undisclosed paywall when he receives it. He also claimed that he had visited [[14 Branchland Court]] at some point, posting a recreation of the visit, which involves the general layout of the house, in Microsoft Paint.<ref>{{Cite Reddit|title=Floor Plan 14 BL|url=https://www.reddit.com/r/Kidasuna/comments/u8jqsa/floor_plan_14_bl/}}</ref>

In [[Jail Letter - 29 July 2022]], Chris claimed Sockness had died. [[Helena]] stated in response to a fan that this was because a fictional version of Sockness was requested to die in her comic and Chris was told the death happened in the comic.

== Bible ==
At an unknown time, Chris had read a Bible that Sockness had sent to him. The Bible seems to consist of 7 books, numbered from 0 to 6. Each of these books is split up into somewhere between 4 to 6 smaller sections. The Bible was first retrieved by [[Naught]] on 14 [[November 2020]] and later posted on the [[Official CWCki Server]]. It was later recovered on 15 March 2023 by CWCki mod [[User:PsychoNerd054|PsychoNerd054]] and a former Watchman member. As a result of being discarded for three years, and many hoaxes surrounding Chris, the Bible had long since been considered a hoax itself.

== Post-Jail return ==
After Chris was [[Jail_Saga#Bonded_out_or_Released_by_court_order|released from jail]] and [[Post-jail sightings (2023)#Walmart|spotted at Walmart]], Sockness made two [[Instagram]] posts about Chris, the first was a screenshot of Sockness sending Chris a photo of his ass, the second was a repost of one of the Walmart photos.<ref>https://www.instagram.com/uaeoh415/</ref>

In an amusing twist of irony, someone spotted Sockness ''himself'' on 23 June, and uploaded two photos of him to Reddit.<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20230624025317/https://www.reddit.com/gallery/14hhgmt</ref> In the photo, Sockness looks as hugely obese as he already is, with his belly massive, and wearing a [[Sonichu medallion]].

==See also==
*[[ChrisReleasesAStatementRegardingJacobSockness]]
*[[Kidasuna]]
*[[Nightvee & the Warriors For Andromeda]], a [[TSSSF]] pack featuring lore from Jacob Sockness.
*[[Sockness DMs]]
*[[Sockness impersonates Magi-Chan]]

==External links==
[https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1Hxz4vhP6IkJwzxIgtX8HjXmB1k8sOMSz Jacob's Google drive, including all of the books]

{{References}}

{{JacobSaga}}
{{WatchmenSaga}}
{{EverfreeSaga}}
{{Love quest}}
{{fantasies}}
{{People}}
{{Articleofthenow}}
{{DEFAULTSORT:Sockness}}
[[Category:Autistic]]
[[Category:Chris's customers]]
[[Category:LGBT]]
[[Category:People]]
[[Category:Sweethearts]]

CWC-isms

2025-06-13T05:47:39Z

Anemichu:

<center>{{Honest}}</center>

{{Protip|Please refrain from using CWC-isms casually when writing articles, as this may make them difficult for newcomers to decipher.}}
One of [[Chris]]'s most notorious features is his strange '''vocabulary''', consisting of a mix of fairly standard words, slang, jargon, and various personal coinages.

Some of these coinages originate from a degree of prudery, likely inherited from his older parents and maintained by his childlike nature. Like many children who don't feel comfortable referring to [[Honest Content|adult concepts]] directly, Chris often resorts to creating cutesy euphemisms for a lot of words that anyone else his age would generally use with little reservation, which is common with autistic people. While some of them are understandable — after all, nobody would really relish discussing their [[Butt garments|diapers]] — others, such as "[[tobacky]]" instead of "tobacco", only serve to turn an otherwise normal sentence into an advertisement for Chris's childish nature.

Others are attempts to be clever that fail miserably, for example, he refers to [[semen]] as "[[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009|navy]]", because semen sounds like sea men, [[Random-access humor|get it?]] Still others come from Chris's love of manipulating words, especially backwards spellings, {{w|portmanteau}} blends, “verbing” nouns, or liberal use of suffixes like “- ish” or “-er”. Combine this with the idiosyncratic speech patterns that are common among [[autism|autistics]] (likely since standard language may seem inefficient to explain their thought processes), and you get his so-called '''CWC-isms'''.

CWC-isms may be combinations or butchered versions of words or phrases that already exist, entirely new words, commonplace words that he uses repeatedly in a peculiar or obsessive way, or entirely new phrases that Chris often has to explain afterwards because nobody knows what he's talking about.

==Primary categories of CWC-isms==
Nearly all CWC-isms belong to one of the four following classes:
# '''CWC-neologism''' - a ''new'' word or phrase, unknown until ''created by Chris''. Example: ''[[CWC-isms#L|Lovehogs]]'', a portmanteau of "love" and "hedgehogs".
# '''CWC-homonym''' - an ''existing'' word or phrase, to which Chris has given a ''different meaning''. These may be euphemisms, designed to avoid naming (to Chris) offensive things, or else due to Chris confusing an elevated word's meaning. Example: ''[[Duck]]'', for Chris's penis; ''[[CWC-isms#T|telekinesis]]'', used erroneously in place of ''telepathy''.
# '''CWC-archaism''' - an ''obscure'' word or phrase, known in English but seldom used by contemporary Virginians, which Chris has learned somewhere and has ''become characteristic'' for Chris's way of speaking/writing. Example: ''[[CWC-isms#U|Uncouth]]'', a word now rarely used outside the context of formal etiquette, which Chris used to tell people how much of a jerk he perceive they're being to him.
# '''CWC-misspelling''' - only the ''most notable'' of Chris's ''misspellings'', including deliberate re-arrangements: those which are characteristic for Chris's way of writing. Example: ''[[Geinus]]'', what he deems himself to be; ''[[Pmurt]]'' for Donald Trump, 45th and 47th president of the United States. Chris's sporadic, inconsistent use of some [[Catherine|British spellings]] while otherwise using American English can also be considered under this category.



__NOTOC__

<div style="position:fixed; bottom:0; center:0">{{Alphabet ToC}}</div>

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

==#==
|-
|

;12-9
[[Image:Sonichu 12-9 Cover.jpg|The cover for Sonichu #12-9|thumb|200px]]

<blockquote>
1. ''(numeral)'' A placeholder for the number thirteen.

<blockquote> ''There are no quotes that cite the use of this CWC-ism directly. Chris however used it in lists that exceed 12 items.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/1006915844016869377</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris has shown on a few occasions to dislike the number 13, due to him deeming it an unlucky number. This phenomenon, referred to as [[wikipedia:Triskaidekaphobia|triskaidekaphobia]], is already a popular superstition in American culture, and this is likely where Chris picked it up. His fear of the number has led to some bizarre effects, particularly in his numbering. A famous example of this unusual numbering shtick is in the 13th issue of his Sonichu comics, which he numbered as "Issue #12-9", in which he used an em-dash in the place of a decimal place. The 12-9 itself is meant to represent a value of "almost 13".</blockquote>

;15 minutes
[[File:15 minutes.jpg|thumb|200px|"It takes me fifteen f-yay minutes"]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' [[Masturbation]], the amount of time it takes for Chris.

<blockquote> ''Masturbation takes '''Fifteen LONG, Tiring and Annoying Minutes'''''<ref name=15min>[[Masturbation discussions]]</ref></blockquote>
<blockquote> ''Self-masturbation is really arduous and annoying. Another '''15 minutes''' down the drain.''<ref name=15min></ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris coined this phrase in 2021, using it in chats with the [[Watchmen]] and in the [[Workaholics Anonymous comic]].</blockquote>

;[[4-cent_garbage.com|4-Cent Garbage]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' The headquarters of [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] and [[4-Chan]] trolls in ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]''.

<blockquote> ''You will recognize her [?] as your sweetheart because from a fav- from a favor on her half, your internal clock will be restored fully, your enemies of '''4-cent-garbage''' will be vanquished, so you both will live together in peace. Live freely.''<ref>[[Sonichu 9 Official Videobook]]</ref></blockquote>
Origin: Since ED and 4chan were partly responsible for Megan's breakup with him, Chris decided to get payback on the both of them by combining the both of them into an evil corporation in Sonichu, dubbing it "4-cent Garbage".</blockquote>

;7-incher
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' A penis which measures seven-inches in length.

<blockquote> ''Good thing we stopped for a pack of condoms; it's too bad the regular-size ones break easily on my '''7-incher'''.''</blockquote>

Origin: According to Chris, his penis is about 7 inches, which he actually believes is the average length of a penis of an adult male <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_20#Oral_doesn.27t_count</ref>. Chris has made all kinds of weird euphemisms for just his penis alone such as this one, "ugly growth", and "duck".</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

==A==
|-
|
;abreast
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' full of; filled with.

<blockquote>''It was not until after saving the city from the forces of Count Graduon and his minions, that she realized her form's new assets. And she was '''abreast''' with delight and glee when she found not the Male Part, but a Vagina!''<ref>[[May 2015 Facebook posts]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''In fact, while I am fairly educated about Tribadism and '''abreast''' with theories, I would appreciate some experience with a lesbian or two who knows what she likes to enlighten me better, including on sensual massage and all that.''<ref>[[May_2015_Facebook_posts]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris uses this word when discussing feminine anatomy and lesbian sex, evidently because it includes the word "breast". He fails to realize that "abreast" actually means "adjacent" or "across".<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/abreast</ref> A possible confusion with the word "abound" or "abundant".</blockquote>

;Adult Swim
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' pornographic or otherwise "NSFW"; containing [[Honest Content|adult content]].

<blockquote>''She still has a great drawing style, even for the '''Adult Swim''' section."<ref>[[CWCSonichu-NightStar2891 DMs]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Refers to the Cartoon Network block ''[[Adult Swim]]''. Chris seemed to only consider the "Adult" part of this block's name, and therefore assumed he could use this phrase to describe anything that's "adult" to him. Note that the Cartoon Network block does not feature pornographic content.

</blockquote>

;adulterous
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' Of an [[Christian Weston Chandler's Adult Chronicles|adult]] and mature nature

<blockquote>''Originally it was supposed to be like, you know, like ages 7 and up, but then I end up going to the content, uh, it could be considered, be like, be like definitely be considered '''adulterous'''.''<ref>[[Lars Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: usually used to describe people who [[Ivy|cheat]] on their [[Blanca Weiss|partners]] (i.e. guilty of adultery), Chris only notices the "adult" component of the word.

2. ''(adjective)'' Insult of unclear nature
<blockquote>''Heeeeey, folks! It's me, [[Clyde Cash]]. I am the ruler of the internet and the internet trolls. I am an '''adulterous''' foe, a bastard and a self-righteous idiot who spends his time wallowing and trolling the one Christian Weston Chandler, and making up a whole bunch of dadgum rumors all over the internet!''<ref>[[100 2267]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris simply throws out the insult without a clear understanding of the word. Possibly referring to Clyde taking [[PandaHalo]] from Chris, though this is more aptly described as cuckoldry than adultery. Perhaps influenced by the verb ''adulterate''.

</blockquote>

;among which
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' Among other things. Et cetera. Also. Additionally

<blockquote>'''''Among which''' I can project myself to (the Ninja Turtles universe)''<ref>[[Dankula]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: [[Autism|Uncertain]]. Chris adopted this phrase and began using it heavily in a number of different contexts through-out 2018. Perhaps the clearest example of chris's over-use of "among which" is the [[Dankula|Count Dankula interview]], where Chris uses the phrase no less than ten times.

</blockquote>

;an' anurr thing
<blockquote>
1. ''(Phrase, transitionary)'' Signifies that Chris wishes to make another point about a subject he is discussing, and that he wishes he were Peter Falk.

<blockquote>''An' anurr thing...CHRIS. Your for real- your real name, as I have been told by Kacey, is only Chris Chandler! No "-tian," no "-topher," just Chris! So, admit that. '''An' anurr thing''', I NAME is NOT IAN! BRANDON!!! SOMETHING!!!!!''<ref>[[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: a corruption of "and another thing". Used constantly when Chris is angry.

</blockquote>
;[[Anaxis bird]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' Signifies that [[Anaxis]] was meant to be a messenger for the information that Chris requested he put in ''A Medium's Guidance''.

<blockquote>
''Perhaps you all may have heard how I came onto this from an '''Anaxis bird'''.''<ref>[[User:Anaxis/Watchmen Source Leaks#"Anaxis Bird"]]</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: A mangling of the phrase "a little birdie told me", indicating that an anonymous source gave someone a piece of secret information. Because of Chris's misuse of the phrase, the other Watchmen present had come to believe that Anaxis was influencing Chris to write both the [[Affirmations List]] and the [[Lovers Attributes List]].</blockquote>

;[[Anchuent Prophecy|anchuent]]
[[Image:Anch.PNG|right|thumb|Chris and Sonichu amazed by the Anchuent Prophecy]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' Describes anything that is archaic in the ''Sonichu'' canon.

<blockquote>
''Well, what's this? I'm havin' an upgrade? Huh! Huh! My- my powers are given me the ability to fly with my wings attached to my head! It's like a w- it's like an add-on! That's optional! Huh! Must have been done by '''Anchuent''' Powers, so awesome I can fly now! Huh!''<ref>[[Sonichu_3_Official_Videobook]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Initially, "anchuent" was taken to be a misspelling of the word "ancient" given Chris's [[Chris and English|poor grasp of the English language]]. Over time, however, it was revealed that "anchuent" was meant to be a portmanteau of the words "ancient" and "Sonichu", adding the "chu" part of "Sonichu" into the word "ancient".<ref>[[Sonichu_3_Official_Videobook]]</ref> </blockquote>

;and shit
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' And additional items.

<blockquote>''I don't want to believe in labels at all but I mean obviously, tale- the incest fanfics have come true '''and shit'''.''<ref>[[Incest call]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''But, yeah, I did not verbally argue as much growing up, and it took facing the even Toughter Moments since 2000 '''and shit''' for me to actually formulate and speak better self-defenses with what is Truth''<ref>[[Jail Letter - 20 October 2021#22 October]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A more profane variant of "and such" (see below). Chris often uses the phrase in unfitting contexts. He may have picked it up from [[Lars]]'s constant usage of the phrase during the 2010 [[Lars Call]].
</blockquote>

;and such
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' And additional items; to add to a list.

<blockquote>''At least to give you all, my patient, loyal Fans and Trolls, something to quell your pallets until Official Merchandise is sold in Official Stores such as Toys 'R' Us, GameStop, Best Buy, Wal-Mart, etcetera '''and such'''.''<ref>[[CWC Blog|Cwcipedia captain's log, 25 November 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris understands the term's meaning, but uses it superfluously.
</blockquote>

;anthropological
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' human-like, anthropomorphic.

<blockquote>''In dressing myself for the burial work, I saw Snoopy had merged with his '''anthropological''' self-counterpart on the C-197 half of the veil.''<ref>[[July 2021 social media posts#Eulogy for Snoopy]]</ref></blockquote>
</blockquote>

;artery

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' art.

<blockquote>''Good evening, but between this and the, uh, oh, and the other clips I would like to present you, uh, a few examples of hand '''artery'''.''<ref>[[CWC - Hand Drawn Original]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Not to be confused with the term for blood vessels. Chris doesn't seem to realize "art" is already a noun and doesn't need the suffix, and that "artistry" also exists.
</blockquote>

;as such

<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' In the manner previously described.

<blockquote>''They just hated me because they don't, they did not understand people with autism. And so they tortured me '''as such'''.''<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris overuses this phrase to the point of self-parody. He's either tacking it on to fill space when he can't think of the next thing to say, or he's peppering it into his language in a feeble attempt to sound intelligent.
</blockquote>

;ass burgers

<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' [[Asperger's Syndrome]]

<blockquote> ''There are no quotes that cite the use of this CWC-ism directly, as Chris instead alludes to it as "a bad cut of cow meat".</blockquote>

Origin: Since the CWCipedia Saga, Chris has been noted for disliking Asperger's Syndrome, viewing it as something that makes autistic people look bad due to the term vaguely sounding like "ass burgers". Chris has alternatively suggested the term can also sound like "something that can be picked nasally", aka "ass boogers".
</blockquote>

;ass manager
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Either a misspelling or a derogatory term for "assistant manager," based on the abbreviation "ass. manager."

<blockquote>''I did not learn until much later that the spritz had done a lot worse than I had imagined it would, as well as learning that they were the so-called "Manager" and "Ass Manager" of that particular store.''<ref>[[December 2014 Facebook Posts#Shit, Meet Fan]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris has only used this term once, when referring to the [[Yellow-Shirted Foe]]. It's unclear if this was a misspelling or [[Manajerk|yet]] [[Jerkop|another]] childish insult based on someone's job title.</blockquote>

;[[Attraction Location|attraction location]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any place Chris may sit to gain the attention of any passing women, only to get promptly kicked out afterward.

<blockquote>''Also, as of early November, I was reemitted into the Fashion Square Shopping Center, and since Mid-December, I totally left the UVA as an '''Attraction Location'''.''<ref>[[Story_of_My_Current_Days]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, having a very difficult socializing with women, thought that sitting around in a certain place and soliciting himself would be a better alternative. Therefore, it would make sense to him to sit in a location with many people in order to gain the attention of several women.</blockquote>

;attraction time

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The time that is spent at an attraction location

<blockquote>''Then, on my next visit to the mall, I felt seriously depressed about what had happened the other day; it killed my '''attraction time'''''.<ref>[[Story_of_My_Current_Days]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;audio-sonic feeling

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the arousing feeling caused by getting hit by sound waves

<blockquote>''Here is a most '''audio-sonic feeling'''. While at the club last night, the [[Chris and music|music]] was loud, maybe reverberating or echoing. The music and beats literally shook up my rack! I actually Felt the music playing and reverbing within my breasts, almost like my breasts had become a pair of speakers. It Felt Amazing and Arousing!''<ref>https://www.facebook.com/cwcville/photos/a.447204945915.244245.167832525915/10152771303590916/?type=3&theater</ref></blockquote>

Origin: As shown in the quote above, Chris believed that he was sexually aroused when sound waves hit him. In actuality, sound, a vibration,<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sound</ref> creates pressure. The louder the sound, the more pressure gets created from the wave. Therefore, very loud music should be able to hit Chris given that he's a [[obesity|huge target]], creating that "arousing" feeling, which is actually an alternation between high and low pressures.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== B ==
|-
|

;B-dog
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Derogatory epithet for women.

<blockquote>''Then that [[Mary Lee Walsh|'''B-Dog''']] ripped up my notes and all, dragged me to her quarters and talked down to me very RUDELY AND HOARSELY.''<ref>[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Childish censorship of the word "bitch"; bitch also meaning "female dog". [[Bubbles Rosechu]] is implied to say this in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], when she shouts "BEEE..!!!" at [[Silvana]].<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_8/Page_95|Issue 8 Pages 94-95}}</ref>
</blockquote>

;bally
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' round; having the texture of a perfectly round ball.

<blockquote>''I've always given her a "'''Bally'''-Scratch" where I stroke her head with all five fingers like as if I was gently squeezing a rubber ball.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_emails_2004-2006</ref></blockquote>

Origin: If one didn't know Chris was referring to his dog, Patti, and that he gives her a "Bally-scratch" on the head, one might conclude that he's fondling someone's genitals. Chris, [[CWC-isms#N|naive]] to how suggestive this sounds, gave this special kind of petting the name "Bally-scratching" because of how stroking her head felt like he was squeezing a rubber ball.</blockquote>

;Be Woman
<blockquote>1. ''(verb phrase)'' Be '''a''' woman.

<blockquote>''I am a Lesbian Transwoman; I am not confused or mentally ill about that; '''I Am Woman.'''''<ref>[[2017_tweets#Proud_to_be_a_feminist]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''How Dare You Insult and be so Inconsiderate of Her like that? '''She Is Woman'''; she would Never Revert Back.''<ref>[[NightStar2891_tweets#She_is_woman]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used regularly when Chris asserts his [[Tomgirl|transgender identity]], notable for the consistent lack of a proper article and capitalization of each word in the phrase. Originally only attested in the first person ("I Am Woman"), a post on Chris's [[Miss Night Star]] Twitter sockpuppet account uses the third person ("She Is Woman"). Technically first appears in [[Sonichu 8]] when [[The Incredible Lioness]] attacks [[Jason Kendrick Howell]], as the somewhat cliché musical reference [[wikipedia:I Am Woman|"I am woman, hear me roar!"]], which may have inspired Chris's broader use of the phrase. This could be a reference to the Bhagavad Gita or Oppenheimer ("Now I am become death, destroyer of worlds.") [[honor roll|but this is unlikely]].
</blockquote>



;[[Biological clock|biological clock]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[Wikipedia:Circadian Rhythm|circadian rhythm]]

<blockquote>'''I have a lot of stored caffeene [sic] in my energy supply, and not only kept me on my toes, but has also messed up my fucking '''biological clock''' as well.''<ref>[[Biological clock]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Although technically not used incorrectly in this context, the phrase "biological clock" is used exclusively for women in their child-bearing years. Possibly a confusion with "internal clock".
</blockquote>

;blangry
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' [[Chris and anger|Angry]].

<blockquote>''Oh, and how 'bout this?! I get '''BLANGRY'''! ''<ref>[[Chris Calls Clyde Out]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Given Chris's belief that he has [[Chris and English|mastered the English language]] and his [[speech impediment]], it's likely he meant to say angry.
</blockquote>

;blue-printed
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Skilled in engineering.

<blockquote>''I like many others, was born a foal; to a '''blue-printed''' Pegasus and a country tomboy earth mare.''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/attachments/screenshot_20171019-235945_01-png.299275/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris portrayed Bob's Pony Counterpart in [[Sonichu 12-9|''Sonichu'' #12-9]] as an engineer, just like the real [[Bob Chandler|Bob]]. Due to Chris's limited vocabulary, Chris knew very little words he could use to describe Bob's profession. Derived from the word "blueprints", the plans set for the design of a product. </blockquote>

;[[Boyfriend-free girl|boyfriend-free]]

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Single; particularly used on women.

<blockquote>''Ahh, well, it's been over a year and ten months now since I started my sweetheart-search; I still haven't found a '''boyfriend-free'''-caring-smoke-free-non-alcoholic-white-girl-near-my-age to build a relationship with from the ground up.''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris’s mission in life used to be to obtain a girlfriend and have sex. However, every chance he thinks he gets, they already have a boyfriend. This has made Chris “fear” girls who already have boyfriends.</blockquote>

;Buddha belly
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Excess fat that gives a person a [[obesity|very round appearance]].

<blockquote>''Okay, well, I admit I do have a '''Buddha belly''', but I am not lazy, I do get out and about, I exercise, I jog and work out, and I eat healthy.''<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: "[[Wikipedia:Buddha|Buddha]]" is a title given to several legendary figures in [[Wikipedia:Buddhism|Buddhism]]. In this case, Chris is making reference to [[wikipedia:Budai|Budai]], who is often known as "Fat Buddha". Chris presumably picked up the phrase from the ''[[Family Guy]]'' episode "To Love and Die in Dixie".
</blockquote>

;bugbears
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[Trolls]], [[weens]], and other Chris-related orbiters who make him miserable.

<blockquote>''Freaking CyberBullies!!!!!!! Real '''Bugbears''', they are!''<ref>[[Apologies to the liked Bronies and Pegasisters; PLEASE UNBLOCK ME ON TWITTER!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Although the term was originally defined in the 16th century as 'a cause of obsessive fear, anxiety, or irritation.', It was given a another definition centuries later to describe a race of hobgoblins made famous by [[Wikipedia:Bugbear (Dungeons & Dragons)|Dungeons & Dragons]]. It's widely believed that Chris picked up the term from [[My Little Pony]]: Friendship is Magic, which depicted these creatures as literal bear-insect hybrids that are first seen terrorizing the ponies.
</blockquote>

;buh bye bay nose
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' but if anybody knows.

<blockquote>''If I knew who you were, I'd give you a kick in da bawls. But I can't, because I don't know who or where you are. '''Buh bye bay nose''' the whereabouts of the... [[JERKS|jerk]]... and just happens to be nearby... or within the state? Give him a swick kick for me.''<ref>[[Christian's Update 13 September 2008]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A result of Chris’s [[speech impediment]]</blockquote>

</blockquote>
;but during the stone age...
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A rebuttal for something obvious being stated.

<blockquote>''You don’t have to tell me twice! '''But during the stone age...'''''<ref>[[Sonichu 2]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: According to the [[Sonichu 2 Official Videobook|Videobook for Sonichu #2]], the phrase originates from how you need to “tell cavemen twice” over anyone else.</blockquote>

;[[Butt garments|butt garment]]
[[Image:Ecp00065.jpg|thumb|Leaked footage of Chris in a butt garment]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' an adult diaper; typically one used to control Chris's [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|fecal incontenence]].

<blockquote>''The doctor corrected that they were liners; he never called them diapers. Neither did Chris- he called them “'''butt garments'''”.''</blockquote>

Origin: To avoid embarrassment from stating that he shits himself constantly, and uses diapers, Chris refers to his adult diapers as butt garments.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== C ==
|-
|

;C-Log
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' Captain's Log.

<blockquote>'''''C-Log''' February 4th, 2010. First off, I'm not dead, and I have a few announcements to make.''<ref>[[I am Alive]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: For quite some time, Chris has had the habit of abbreviating certain words or phrases that begin with "'''C'''", possibly for [[Chris and his Ego|his name also beginning with "'''C'''"]], as well as to put greater emphasis on the letter C in the words he abbreviates. Other examples of this kind of abbreviation include "C-Mas" and "C-Ville".
</blockquote>

;C-Mas
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' Christmas

<blockquote> ''The [[Christmas]] season is upon us, and with that comes the rush for the '''C-Mas''' Turkey, Tree (real or artificial), and of course, the presents. So, Sonichu and the News Dash have some helpful tips to give a better feel of the season to all.<ref>[[Sonichu's_News_Dash#A_Very_Special_Holiday_Chris-chan]]
</ref>''</blockquote>

Origin: See ''C-Log''.
</blockquote>

;C Ville (or C-Ville)
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' [[Charlottesville, VA]].

<blockquote>''Look, you're going to back in '''C-Ville''' tomorrow, I can meet you at the McDonalds at Forest Lakes, what time is good for our meeting?''<ref>[[Vanessa AIM Chat 3]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Generic term for any city whose name fits the pattern of beginning with "C" and ending with "ville," e.g., [[CWCville]], Charlottesville, etc.

<blockquote>''And when you diss Cwcville you disf- you diss every "'''C Ville'''" within these United States.''<ref>[[Do Not Dis C Ville]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: See ''C-Log''.
</blockquote>

;[[Captain's Log|Captain's Log]]
[[File:CWCtrek1.png|400px|right|thumb|The Autistic Generation]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' The classic opening for a vlog video Chris makes to adress the fanbase, which includes the date of production. Replaced in 2015 with "live from home once again".

<blockquote>'''''Captain's Log'''. Stardate: September... 24th, 2008.''<ref>[[Chris Chan Update 24 September 2008]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: One may come to the conclusion that Chris picked up this phrase from Star Trek, however, Chris is neither a fan of the Star Trek franchise, nor has he seen any clips of the show<ref>[[Mailbag_3]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag_14]]</ref>. It is more likely that Chris picked up the phrase from cartoons like [[Family Guy]], which references Star Trek, considering how much he watched the show religiously.</blockquote>

;carniverous
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' evil, vengeful.

<blockquote>''On today's show, we will take a close-up look at the '''carniverous''' jerkops.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComic5P29.htm</ref></blockquote>Origin: A misspelling of "carnivorous". It is unknown what word Chris meant to use here, but "carnivorous" certainly wasn't it.</blockquote>

;[[china]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Female genitalia

<blockquote>''I love dykes! DYKES! '''CHINA!'''''<ref>[[CWC's_Second_Message]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, uncomfortable with directly saying the word "vagina", decided to alter the word to a cutesy, similar-sounding word. Based off of a term for porcelain "china".</blockquote>

;coldest shoulder

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' to rebel.

<blockquote>''Those people like me at the very least, NOT counting all of the deceitful people I have had the displeasure of knowing who turned '''Coldest Shoulder''' Against me and STARTED all of the Online Hatred.''<ref>[[April_2012_Facebook_posts]]</ref>

''One of which, Amanda, is one of the Part-Time Manajerks who gives her elders the '''coldest of shoulders'''.''<ref>[[Coffee Place]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A misuse of the phrase "turning a cold shoulder", a phrase used for the negligence of another person<ref>https://www.collinsdictionary.com/us/dictionary/english/turn-a-cold-shoulder-to</ref>. </blockquote>

;Come Adore
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A sermon from Chris's religion.
<blockquote>''That's all for now. Be safe and well.

Mrs. Jesus Christine Chan Sonichu.

Commodore Come Adore<ref>[[Jail Letter - 27 June 2022]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Yet another retarded pun from Chris, specifically based on the [[Commodore 64]].
</blockquote>

;[[Comeuppance|comeuppance]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Male orgasm.
<blockquote>''...I feel my '''comeuppance''' and I come into your mouth, my [[semen]] is inside your mouth and you'd swallow every drop. (...) And right after I'd given you my first round, my first '''comeuppance''', you would take, you would reach down, and you would take your face away from my penis...''<ref>[[Chris Sex Logs]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' [[Semen]], usually immediately after ejaculation. ''See also: [[CWC-isms#N|Navy]]''
<blockquote>''Yeah, and I'm just gonna keep bangin' your breasts over and over again until you get the first dosage of my '''comeuppance'''!''<ref>[[Kacey Phone Call]]</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: Chris uses the sexual slang "cum" as a [[For Julie's Eyes Only|verb]] for orgasm, but he may not realize it can also be a noun referring to ejaculate. In his mind, "comeuppance" apparently serves that purpose, viz., "that which has come/cum up."

In the real world, "comeuppance" is an English noun meaning [[Wiktionary:comeuppance|outcome which is justly deserved]] based upon the common verb "come," i.e., the state of coming forward to receive judgment. He is either unaware of the original definition of the word or does not appreciate the irony of telling women he's going to give them comeuppance.

Note that the contexts of the real word and Chris's version are different. When a woman is rebuked, she receives her comeuppance; when a woman gets Chris's hot load in her face, she receives ''his'' "comeuppance."
</blockquote>

;count you(r) blessing(s)
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used as a retort when someone complains about the quality of your work.
<blockquote>It’s an early thing; it will improve later on. Curb your enthusiasm and '''count your blessing.'''</blockquote>
Origin: In [[January 2020]] Chris was seen using the phrase when he was attacked after chimping out about being blocked on social media. Recently people have been questioning the quality of the newest [[medallions]], produced by [[Praetor]]. Chris, perhaps in an attempt to "calm the trolls down'' tells them to '''count their blessings''.</blockquote>

;crash into slumber (or crash and burn)
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To get so sad and [[Chris and stress|stressed out]] that you get tired from exhaustion.

<blockquote>And… the void in my heart that requires a sweetheart is open again, and it hurts. I hope you jerks and trolls who wanted to break us up… are happy… 'cause all you did was make me feel sad and depressed. And you made me '''crash… into slumber'''… a couple of times. And you know, it takes a lot of stress and exhaust… and such… to make a person feel like they're gonna crash and burn… into a whole bunch of s-- into a long slumber… that just basically sleeps o-- that just basically sleeps off the—uh, what's the word I was looking for? I had it. Ugh…<ref>[[Chris Chan Update 21 October 2008]]
</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris famously said that he "crashed into slumber" in the video [[Chris Chan Update 21 October 2008]], where he shows off how depressed and angry he was with his latest tomfoolery at the time. It could be because that one of Chris' main methods of coping with his stress is to sleep it off, and tried to make it sound hyperbolic by stating that he "crashed" onto the bed, as if he tried to get it done sooner.</blockquote>

;crestfallen
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Sad and disappointed

<blockquote>''I should have been Highly Recognized for my ARTISTIC TALENTS I showed in my Many Art Classes for the Award Ceremonies before Graduation Day. I felt '''crestfallen''' greatly from not getting recognized for any of my Talents. I EXCELLED IN MATH TOO FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Manchester_High_School</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I also HAD Hidden ALL of the Blue Armed Sonic Toys at Toys R Us here, concealed hidden amongst their metal cupboards, so they ALL would NOT be SOLD, and Best Boycotted for The Protest! They remained hidden for the longest time of over a Month; found and reshelved near the 20th of December to my personal dismay and '''crestfall'''. And at Best Buy, ALL Copies of THEIR Sonic Boom Games are STILL SUCCESSFULLY CONCEALED AND HIDDEN from View AND Purchase!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/26_December_2014</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Another obscure word Chris liked to use a lot, even today. It even got to the point where he tried to put it into a baffling progressive tense "to my dismay and crestfall".</blockquote>

;crooks
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Those who may steal Chris's intellectual property for malicious purposes. ''(pl.)''

<blockquote>''I aways keep my eyes open for '''crooks''' who take my [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]]'s name and put it in offensive use!''<ref>''[[:File:116-CWCCop.jpg|116-CWCCop.jpg]]''</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' websites, and even words on websites which communicate lies about Chris.

<blockquote>''And that [[ED]] page is one of those crooks. Every page--every word on the discussion page is a '''crook'''.''<ref>[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A finishing move Chris does on his adversaries in order to "curse" them, publicly or otherwise.

<blockquote>''Hmmm...'''Curse-ye-ha-me-HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/NO_D***_WAY,_IMPOSTOR!!!</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A reference to the Kamehameha energy attack from the [[Dragon Ball]] series, performed in the same way it is in the anime. Chris believes that he possesses [[Chris and reality#Magic|magical powers]]. Typically, these so-called magical powers would be used whenever an enemy gets in the way of whatever he wants to do, since Chris is too afraid to actually fight anyone. Therefore, he will rely on this magical power in order to gain control of whoever is giving him trouble.</blockquote>

;CWC-sense
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The ability to sense Chris's presence.

<blockquote> ''Seriously though, awesome timing coming in, just as we, and Chris, had just finished writing the lyrics...was your '''CWC-sense''' tingling?''<ref>https://www.patreon.com/posts/15092809</ref></blockquote></blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== D ==
|-
|

;D.A.
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' Unexplained, presumably a substitution to avoid the word "dumbass." Most likely ''not'' "District Attorney," although equally applicable to [[Marvey Blaziken]].

<blockquote>''You are obviously a troll trying to pick on my nerves; nice try, '''D.A.'''''<ref>[[Mailbag 15]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris intermittently decides to self-censor his profanities for the benefit of younger readers.
</blockquote>

;da
<blockquote>1. ''(article)'' [[Wikipedia:Eye dialect|Eye dialect]] spelling of the word [http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/the the].

<blockquote>''Y'all know me as [[DJ Jamsta|Jamsta Sonichu]], '''da''' DJ with da power!''<ref>[[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], page 43</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris writes "the" as "da" when he intends for his characters (or himself) to sound laid-back and cool. This is most notable with Jamsta Sonichu, who is supposed to sound like a hip radio DJ and/or a [[Niggos|Jamaican man]]. Chris may intend at times to do the same thing in his verbal communications, although his [[speech impediment]] makes it difficult to tell when he actually means to say "da."
</blockquote>

;Da Update
[[File:Daupdate.jpg|thumb|400px|[[Megan]], comparing Chris's [[Chris and his Ego|attitude]] to [[Dragon Ball Z|Goku]].]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' The latest news.

2. ''(phrase)'' The most recent fail Chris is responsible for.

<blockquote>''Hey, guys! What's '''da update'''?''</blockquote>

Origin: Dialogue used by Chris, in an exceedingly awkward attempt to sound casual, in the pages of [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]. As Chris's [[fans]] have searched the Internet for the latest news from our hero, "da update" has become shorthand for "the latest [[Relics of Fail|failure]] Chris has committed." The phrase became legendary when posted above the Chris-chan talk page on [[ED]] (eventually the page was locked, forcing mass migration to the [[PVCC (message board)|PVCC]]).

</blockquote>

;[[Darling|darling]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A potential lover, even one that shows no affection back at you.

<blockquote>''Thank you, Doopie '''Darling'''. :)<ref>[[July 2017 tweets#Thanks, darling]]</ref>''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris, so hellbent on being [[Chris and kindness|kind]] to just about any potential sweetheart he met, thinks it's appropriate to refer to women he doesn't know outside of the internet by pet names to sound like he really cares for them, despite it being creepy to most other people. Chris's main justification for using this word on women who don't bond with him is that the actor [[Wikipedia:Tallulah Bankhead|Tallulah Bankhead]] used this word a lot, ignoring the fact that she only did this while on set.</blockquote>

;[[Dating education|Dating Education]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' formal education in schools about dating people of the opposite sex.

<blockquote>''Also, in addition, while we also fully support Sexual Education in every high school, Christian Weston Chandler also highly recommends, and would gladly support, '''Dating Education''' classes, because, while Sex Ed is great for the eventual, well-earned intercourse after 3 or more dates, it is vital to learn what to do before that moment. It should be well0taught how to approach and ask one’s member of the opposite gender out for the very first date.''<ref>[[:File:DatingEducation.jpg]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The lack of "Dating Education classes" is something that Chris used to complain about all of the time, because he's simply incapable of finding a [[CWC-isms#S|sweetheart]], and that it would be a great advantage for people of his type to learn how to do so. Chris doesn't understand that a key aspect of obtaining a mate is to develop the proper [[Chris and socialization|social skills]], especially those around [[women]], and that it has very little to do with how much sex he has with them.</blockquote>

;dementia
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A synonym for Chris's [[autism]].

<blockquote>''My brain is blank and, I definitely wouldn't have realized. Word of the day, Dementia. The umbrella term for all the mentally wearing down people, I got some dementia okay? So give me time, give me space, alright? And some slack.''<ref>[[Live Game Stream - C-Log 04192017 - The Shirt]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;detail
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A thing of importance that Chris cannot recall at any given moment.

<blockquote>''I do not have the appropriate calm state of mind to make time to READ those numerous upon numerous small-print '''details''', much less memorize them.''<ref>[[Wikipedia#May 2009 drama]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

<blockquote>2. ''(noun)'' Something that Chris does not understand.

<blockquote>''There was one I remember from then where the essay had a lot of offensive content, including smoking, and I spoke my mind on how offended I was of it. Plus other details I misunderstood that he was expecting in the assignments.'' <ref>[[Jackie E-mails 9]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's ability to retain information is questionable (unless it's about [[Sonichu (comic)|something]] [[Lego|he]] [[Pokémon|obsesses]] [[PS3|over]]). As such, he "misunderstands" and "forgets" a lot of glaringly important things, such as [[Father call|how to live on his own]] and [[Jackie E-mails 2|the fact that he cheated on Ivy]].
</blockquote>

;devotee
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An [[enabler]] of Chris.

<blockquote>''Ah, I believe I have the proper term. Going from "Worshiper", I checked the thesaurus:"'''Devotee'''" in the term sounds better. "Devotees of Chris Chan Sonichu"(DoCCS). This is my better educates and thought suggestion." ''<ref>[[November 2019 social media posts#Devotees of Chris Chan Sonichu]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Believing himself to be a goddess, Chris needed a term to refer to any of his followers. The term was originally "worshiper", but then after a quick thesaurus search, he decided to change the term to "devotees", solely because he thought it sounded smarter. Although technically a synonym of "worshiper", the term "devotee" is more often used in Eastern religions such as Hinduism and Buddhism.
</blockquote>

;Did the do, to do the do
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To have sexual intercourse, likely under deceptive conditions

<blockquote>''[[Lovely Weather|Lovely]] was hot. She mistook me for myself and we went home from work that night, so Lovely and I '''did the do''', and it was awesome!''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_10/Page_2|Issue 10 Page 2}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An even more benign variation of the common euphemism for sex, "doing it". Likely taken from [[Wikipedia:Emission_Impossible|an episode]] of [[Family Guy]].
</blockquote>

;dige
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Marijuana

<blockquote>''My name's [[Inos]]... wha' chu up to? I am eclectic on this hedge... high on the hog... you wan' som' of this '''dige''', mon?''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_10/Page_70|Issue 10 Page 70}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Intended to be part of a coded reference to "Sonichu, Electric Hedgehog Digimon". It is not known why he changed the reference from "Pokemon" to "Digimon".
</blockquote>

;[[dimension]]
[[File:Chrisminecraft.jpg|right|thumb|In a universe of multiple realities, anything is possible according to Chris.]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Either our universe or a fictional one, such as the one in which ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' or ''[[My Little Pony]]'' are set, both held to be equally [[Chris and reality|real]] in Chris's ontology.

<blockquote>''For Our Home World and All other '''Dimensions''', Realities and Worlds; All Of Us! Dance! Dance! Dance!!!''<ref>[[Freestyle Dance With Me, For Our World]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Dumbing down some physicists' hypothetical notion of other physical universes embedded in mathematically higher-dimensional space, which has since seeped into pop culture and thence down to Chris.
</blockquote>

;[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Used as a reference to Chris's fecal incontinence.

<blockquote>''I have NUMBERS OF PAIRS OF '''DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS'''.''<ref>[[IRC_(20_January_2009)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this phrase during an [[IRC (20 January 2009)|IRC chat]] with [[Clyde Cash]] and [[BILLY MAYS]] after they alleged that Chris has a fondness to wear women's underwear. In order to confirm his straightness, he retorted by admitting the fact that he has "NUMBERS OF PAIRS OF DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS". Soon after, due to how humorous the phrase sounded, it became a shorthand for trolls to refer to Chris's fecal incontinence.</blockquote>

;disabled of crafting
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Too apathetic to work

<blockquote>''Since last December with the Lulu.com problems (resolved), that has left me with a bad emotional and mental scar. Leaving me feeling '''disabled of crafting'''...''<ref>[[August 2016 Facebook posts#Too lazy to work]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris being defensive when a customer asked how he could be trusted to follow through on an order, when he had failed to send out orders from his Etsy shop, which resulted in his seller account getting closed.
</blockquote>

;dispel
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' Reject, turn away

<blockquote>''[T]o dispel me is to discriminate against the LGBTQ community as well.<ref>[[Unban_contracts#GameStop|GameStop unban contract]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A misunderstanding of the meaning of the word.</blockquote>

;Dork of Ages
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Someone who deserves scorn for creating an [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] article on you.

<blockquote>He is the '''Dork of Ages'''. Y'all should be sending every last complaint and hatred towards—rain down upon him. Send him every last email you can. Shower him with as much hate as possible until that Encyclopedia Dramatica page is taken down, [gives a thumbs down] along with him.<ref>[[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used on [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] after he created Chris' Encyclopedia Dramatica page. This phrase was [[List of phrases Chris copied from media|taken]] from the American Dad episode "Dungeons and Wagons", where Hayley called Steve the "Dork of Ages" while he played "Dragon Shuffle".</blockquote>

;Drunk, High Aqua Teenatic
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Backstabber.

<blockquote>''You could be a Better, More Supportive Friend, instead of a '''Drunk, High Aqua Teenatic''' with your sweetheart!!!''<ref>[[October 2017 Facebook posts#Quinn breaks up with Chris again]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A bizarre attempt to turn the title of the Adult Swim cartoon, ''[[Aqua Teen Hunger Force]]'' into an insult.</blockquote>

;[[duck]]
[[Image:BentDuck.jpg|thumb|right|An example of a bent duck]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's penis

<blockquote>''MY '''DUCK''' HUNGERS FOR TOM-TOM TO POUND!!!!!''<ref>[[I_Am_The_TRUE,_Original_CCWC]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Initially "duck" was taken to be a typo of "dick" since the "u" and "i" keys are close together. It was later revealed that Chris was using this neologism as an intentional euphemism to refer to his own penis.<ref>[[Mumble 8]]</ref>

''See also:'' [[CWC-isms#P|pickle]]</blockquote>

;dyke

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A vagina.

<blockquote>I love dykes! DYKES! '''CHINA!'''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2008]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In actuality, the word dyke (or dike) refers to an embankment, wall, or ridge built to control or confine water. It is also a derogatory term for [[lesbian]]s, which is somewhat ironic, given Chris's homophobia at the time.</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== E ==
|-
|

;elbow-greased
[[Image:Elbow-Greased Strength.jpg|200px|thumb|Chris gets swole]]

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Earned from hard work and exercise

<blockquote>''There are no quotes that cite the use of this CWC-ism. It appears in his [[resume]], where he lists "elbow-greased strength" as one of his "functional skills"''</blockquote>

Origin: A misuse of the idiom, "elbow-grease", a figure of speech humorously used for tasks that involve manual labor only. </blockquote>

;[[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]]''

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any of the characters found in Sonichu which are hybrids of [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] characters and/or Pokemon.

<blockquote>''Since the inspiration and conception of Sonichu, the '''Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon''' on March 17, 2000, I have grown further in his stories, plots and adventures in a series of hand-drawn and computer-edited comic books.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris%27s_resume</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Despite the name, a majority of "Electric Hedgehog Pokemon" are neither Pokemon or hedgehogs. This misnomer may come from Chris's original characters being hybrids of two Sonic characters, both of whom are hedgehogs (Sonic and Amy Rose) and two Pokémon (Pikachu and Raichu).</blockquote>

;emotional differences

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A strong disagreement between two people.

<blockquote>''I told you! It was, it was because of, uh, '''emotional differences.'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call#The_Shit_Hits_the_Fan</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris mentioned that he got terminated from [[Wendy's]] in the [[Father Call]], due to their "emotional differences", possibly meaning that a heated argument between him and his employer ensued.</blockquote>

;empirical
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' resorting to experience to gain knowledge rather than through scientific means.

<blockquote>''So, throw away the book talk; be '''empirical''' and believe what you know is fact'' <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2012_Facebook_posts#Empirical</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris attributed the nearly opposite definition of the word to Jeremy Hilary Boob PhD, a character from [[Wikipedia:Yellow Submarine|''Yellow Submarine'']]. Considering this, Chris must have picked up this strange definition from the content in the Beatles Edition of ''Rock Band''.</blockquote>

;entendre

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Charisma or attraction

<blockquote>''Too much '''entendre'''?''<ref>https://www.patreon.com/posts/15092809</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Derived from the phrase "double entendre", a figure of speech used for words or phrases with a double meaning, typically [[Duck|with]] [[Mass Debating|one]] [[China|of]] [[Recycling|them]] [[Pickle|being]] [[Comeuppance|risque]].<ref>https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/double%20entendre</ref> In English, the word "entendre" isn't typically used outside of the phrase itself, but in many other languages like French and Catalan, it is understood to mean "to hear" or "to understand". Chris, thinking he knows everything there is to know about the English language, once again thought he would sound smart by using this obscure word.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== F ==
|-
|

;[[Fangs|fangs]]
[[File:Showing_Off_Fangs.jpg|thumb|right|200px|How Chris imagined himself when showing off his canines]]
[[File:ChrisCavities.JPG|thumb|right|200px|The reality. The red arrows point to Chris' cavities]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's canine teeth.

<blockquote>''They're called Eye-Teeth, but they feel and look like '''fangs''' of a vampire, dog or something to me.''<ref>[[Sonichu_Girls#Your_understanding_me_fukky_.281_January_2009.29]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I'm not afraid to SHOW MY '''FANGS'''!''<ref>[[CWC_Update_8_January_2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes his teeth to be unordinary compared to most other people's teeth, apparently believing canine teeth are some kind of special trait only a selected few people have. Because he believes his canines to be menacing, he gave them the name "fangs". Once in a while, Chris would show off his decaying teeth to scare his enemies. This usually works, although for the wrong reasons.</blockquote>

;faredoo
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection, imperative verb)'' Parting salutation, akin to "goodbye".

<blockquote>''Vessel of my loneliness for the past three years of anguish. I bid you fond...'''faredoo'''. Adieu. Fond farewell adieu...''<ref>[[The MovingFoward videos]].</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Accidental portmanteau of "farewell" and "adieu".
</blockquote>

;fart-minded

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' dumb and perverted.

<blockquote>Ha Ha! Take THAT, you '''fart-minded''', jerk [[MALE]] among ALL fart-minded, jerk Males that make up the Majority of the Worldwide Male Population! -:D<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivtWQTjXCDs</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in the comment section of a Stopmotion Lego animation, where a ''Lego'' minifigure is in a sexual relationship with a ''Lego Friends'' minifigure. Throughout this video, the Lego minifigure essentially acts how Chris believes most men do. At the end of the video, the male minifigure proceeds to fart, which disgusts the female minifigure. Also a possible butchering of the phrase "brainfart", which is used to humorously refer to a moment of absentmindedness.</blockquote>

;firstly
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' A word that indicates that Chris is about to tell someone why he's right. Often not followed by an enumerated list of reasons, despite the implication.

<blockquote>'''''Firstly''', Aspergers is NOTHING Similar to Autism; Aspergers pertains to MEMORY, Autism is Social Skills. and I'm High-Functionally Autistic''<ref>[[IRC_(02_January_2009)|IRC chat, 02 January 2009]].</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Use of "firstly" to begin a list, rather than "first," is a matter of dispute. While both words exist in the dictionary, "Firstly" has fallen out of common use in speech and tends to sound more formal, perhaps overly so. Chris seems to like this formality, probably because he thinks it sounds smart.
</blockquote>

;fondful
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' fond.

<blockquote>''Faithfully yours with '''fondful''' thoughts; Chris Chan.''<ref>[[Megan Emails, Jan-July 2007|Chris's email to Megan Schroeder]], 06 July 2007</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris apparently doesn't understand that "fond" is already an adjective by itself.
</blockquote>

;for good-like
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' final, but with the imagined possibility otherwise.

<blockquote>''And in June of 2008, he banned me from the store '''for good-like'''.''<ref>[[Wallflower E-mails|Chris's email to The Wallflower]], 18 February 2010</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Confusing modification of "for good".
</blockquote>

;foresee/foretell/foreknow
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To make a wild guess at something occuring, claiming it's a "prediction".

<blockquote>''#Saberspark Is right. This is one reason why I stay clear from certain games and shows. My intuition also senses and '''foresees''' the quality and feel without even having to watch or play it at all''<ref>[[March 2025 social media posts#Brainrot]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(verb)'' To have predicted something that already happened or that someone else claimed would happen, but didn't.

Origin: Chris claims he has the ability to predict the future, an aspect of his divinity. However, Chris only ever makes these claims whenever an event has already happened, claiming he predicted it would, or when he makes a confident guess at the future based purely on his intuition.
</blockquote>

;foundate
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To dedicate, as in a monument or building.

<blockquote>''I, Christian Weston Chandler, re-'''foundate''' this monument that is the PAGE with MY SOLE HONEST TRUTH from my sound mind and heart.''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|1=Christian_in_his_Own_Words#Captain.27s_Log.2C_Stardate:_June_6.2C_2009|2=Christian in his Own Words}}.</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Likely a portmanteau of "found" and "dedicate", or a bizarre attempt to convert "foundation" into a verb.
</blockquote>

;four-boomerang-shaped symbol
[[File:Fourboom.jpg|thumb|right|"G'Day welcome to Auschwitz"]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' minced oath for "[[Wikipedia:swastika|swastika]]," especially the ''Hakenkreuz'' symbol of the [[Nazis|Nazi]] Party.

<blockquote>''Like Most People, I do not care much for Adolf; he was a terrible man, and even in jest, I WOULD NEVER want to portray him, much less, his '''four-boomerang-shaped symbol''' (I know what it is called, but I do not wish to type the word).''<ref>[[Mailbag 5#That wacky Hitler|Mailbag 5]]
</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris was apparently afraid to say the word "swastika," probably for the same reason he used to [[Niggos|fear using racial slurs]].
</blockquote>

;fourth wall

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A boundary that separates [[Reality Cartoon|reality cartoons]] and [[Dimensions|dimensions]] from dimension C-197.

<blockquote>''Hey, Everyone. I have another announcement for you all to do now, for yourselves and our OCs: Break Your Own '''Fourth Wall'''.
<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1195039493130199041</ref>''</blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' An abstract force that prevents people from talking to their OC's.

<blockquote>Our OCs in C-197 often break their '''fourth walls''', because they are aware of us, and it is our time and turn to return the favour.</blockquote>

Origin: Comes from the phrase "breaking the fourth wall", a figure of speech humorously used on characters that acknowledge the audience directly, or state their awareness of the media they're in. Chris has taken this to mean that all dimensions in the universe are separated by this kind of barrier, therefore calling them "the fourth wall". In a recent Twitter post, Chris has also stated that this mysterious force is the reason why people cannot see or interact with their OC's, but that the OC's themselves are fully aware of their creators, so will eventually break through the barrier every once in a while to speak to people of other dimensions.</blockquote>

;[[Friend Zone|friend zone]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The dreaded moment a sweetheart rejects you.

<blockquote>''A lot of times, especially if the friend in question is opposite of gender 18 or older, they may have sex on the brain. And when that person hears from you that you just want to be friends, or in the other term, put into the '''Friend Zone''', that person will feel like they failed at getting the sex they wanted, or Ever will from you.''<ref>[[August 2017 tweets]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' The lousiest excuse a sweetheart could give for not having sex with Chris.

<blockquote>''Nothing has happened in Women's Rights; the "Friend Zone" is only the LOUSIEST EXCUSE EVER to give to someone the woman deeply cares about and trusts so she could get out of sex or a relationship. I do not take kindly to that Excuse at this time.''<ref>[[Common Questions]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The Friend Zone refers to a relationship where one person desires romance, while the other only shows interest in friendship. Much like his stance on the Three-Date Rule, Chris believed that the Friend Zone is simply another rule explicitly placed on him by some unspecified authority to slow down his progress on completing his [[Love Quest]]. His belief that this is simply an "excuse" to avoid having sex with him reveals a lot on why he was [[Megan|overly-persistent with]] [[Wallflower|some of]] [[Doopie|his sweethearts]]. He couldn't imagine why any woman would not want to have sex with him, so he came to the conclusion that every woman he stalks are simply unfamiliar with sex and what goes into it.</blockquote>

;[[Fuzzy-wuzzies|fuzzy-wuzzies]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The rewards of giving Chris compliments.

<blockquote>''Compliments will get you '''fuzzy-wuzzies'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. Believed to be another example of Chris' random-access humor. May have been derived from an English assignment in [[Manchester High School|high school]], "[[Manchester High Leaks#Warm Fuzzies|Warm Fuzzies for Christian]]".

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#P|prickly-wicklies]]
</blockquote>

{{clear}}
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== G ==
|-
|

;[[Gal pal|gal-pal]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a female friend.

<blockquote>''And also, I would like to give a shout-out to...Ivy, sweet '''gal-pal''' of mine...and her friend Rachel across the hall from her, in a college within these United States!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Update_18_March_2009_More_Updated</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris rarely refers to any of his female friends as just "friends", simply because he thinks that all female friends have the potential to be [[CWC-isms#S|sweethearts]] before they're in the dreaded [[Friend Zone]]. Chris also states that due to his autism, this somehow means that he gets along much more easily with girls than with guys. <ref>Autism Tutorial Part 5</ref> Although this could be more due to the fact that he overall has had much better experiences with girls than with boys growing up, especially in high school. This has caused him to pick up more [[Transgender|effeminate traits and characteristics]]. The term "gal-pal" is typically used by women when they are talking to other people in their social clique. Chris therefore picked this phrase up from the girls he's talked to (possibly using the phrase because he sees himself as "one of the girls"). It is also common for [[homos]] to use this to refer to their female friends.
</blockquote>
;gawd
<blockquote>
1. ''(interjection)'' eye dialect of "god", Used in the place of "god" when it is used to express annoyance, shock, or pain.

<blockquote>''Life is f***ed up. (I had a real stressful Sunday afternoon) '''Gawd'''! Just... GAWD!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/2017_tweets#STRESSFUL_SUNDAY._GAWD.21</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Possibly meant to add dramatic effect to saying "god", which is already used to add dramatic effect.</blockquote>

;gaybian
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a male lesbian.

<blockquote>''Uh… simply put—and I am willing to say this… in sound mind and body: I… am a '''gaybian'''.''<ref>[[Chris_Comes_Out_of_the_Closet]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris only used this word once in the video [[Chris_Comes_Out_of_the_Closet]]. Before this video, [[Clyde Cash]] had threatened to harm [[Julie]] under the condition that Chris refuses to admit that he's gay. Chris being Chris, he had absolutely no idea that he was once again under another elaborate trolling scheme, and had no clue how to handle the situation. Chris thought he could be sly and admit to being gay, while also being attracted to women. Thus, he tacked on the word "gay" onto "lesbian" to create the word "gaybian" so that he can say that he's a "male lesbian", despite this being a complete contradiction within itself.</blockquote>

;geinus
[[Image:Robotnik.jpg|thumb|I'M A MAD GEINUS! [[Doctor Robotnik|ROBOTNIK]]! ROBOTNIK!]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a genius

<blockquote>''Robotnik! Robotnik! I'm a mad '''geinus'''! Robotnik, Robotnik!''<ref>[[Sonichu 1]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An accidental misspelling of "genius", this CWC-ism is the result of Chris's ability to spell, or lack thereof. In his futile attempts to spell words with "eni", he substitutes this with "ein", possibly due to his habit of spelling words phonetically.</blockquote>

;get it through your skulls
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' Used to clarify something to your fans
<blockquote>''So everybody '''get it through your skulls''', I'm the real deal.'' <ref>[[CCWC's Final Warning to the Second CWC]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this term a lot when trying to clarify various misconceptions about him, such as his straightness, and who the real CWC was. Variations of the phrase include "GET IT THROUGH YOUR THICK SKULLS", "Get it through your damn, dirty, immature skulls!", and "Get through your damn, dirty, stupid, idiotic, immature skulls".</blockquote>

;gitar
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' A guitar

Origin: How Chris pronounces the word "guitar".
</blockquote>

;give birth, give the birth
<blockquote>
1. ''(verb)'' To transfer possession of the state of having been born, by bearing as offspring.

<blockquote>''My mother and my father are both really nice, old-fashioned-type people who not only '''gave the birth'''--gave me birth at their ages...which my mother is sixty-six, currently, and my father is currently eighty. They both just turned that way in the last couple of months. And, uh, I was born in 1982. They gave me the birth...then, and, uh, anyway, it was so nice of--for them to give me the, uh, birth during the early [[1980s]].''<ref>[[Chris Chan's Public Announcement]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to think that a sentence like "Barbara gave birth to Christian" is grammatically equivalent to a sentence like "Barbara gave Go-bots to Christian."
</blockquote>

;GO!
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' Having a style similar to the cartoon ''Teen Titans Go!''.

<blockquote>''As MUCH, as I would like to agree; Cute as it may be, it is still '''GO!''' Version, and #GOPony is something we Really do not like.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1211396957203247104</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' Of a descent originating from [[Dimensions|dimension CZ-69]].

<blockquote>''Just; Most '''GO!''' individuals are...NO!!!''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1215833863718567937</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this CWC-ism to describe his distaste for the MLP:FiM spinoff series [[Pony Life]], believing it to be in the same vein as Teen Titans Go! due to its artstyle. He would go around on his [[Twitter]] account spamming Hasbro and/or users showing any interest in the show with some of his TSSSF cards as a means of protest using this euphemism to put it under a bad light.
</blockquote>

;go make a rhyme
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used by Chris to indicate that he is in a [[Chris and writing|poetic]] mood.

<blockquote> ''Oh, Back Off, '''go make a rhyme'''. Love will come your way in good time.<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/913230475774369794</ref> Keep Heart, Have hope and faith. Life is a coinkie-dink strafe. Have an open heart, don’t be afraid. Your sweetie is likely in your friendship parade.''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris intended to write a rhyme in order to sound poetic in a tweet, continuing with the rhyming schtick in several subsequent ones. Due to his own laziness, the best Chris could come up with in terms of words that rhyme with "time" is "rhyme".
</blockquote>

;[[Godjesus]]
[[Image:Jesusbot.jpg|thumb|This is who Chris actually believes in.]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(shorthand)'' God and Jesus Christ.

<blockquote> ''As I have guide, as I was guide [sic] by, uh, God and Jesus. And because I, uh, cheated on Ivy lately, '''Godjesus''' were mad at me, so, even though she r-, even though she requested the recent items of question, sex-, [quietly] sexual stuff--videos and pictures--I am being punished because the trolls are getting their hands on them.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Matthew_5:27,_CWC_Confessions</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And also, who I'd like to thank, '''GodJesus''', our God and our Lord and savior, for their support, for their support as well, I pray to them every day, and I follow, I am guided by Jesus.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Update_9_April_2009</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris appears to be somewhat aware of the Holy Trinity (Holy Spirit, Son, and Father), the three forms that God takes in mainstream Christianity. Despite accepting Jesus as the son of God, Chris believes that God and Jesus are essentially the same entity. As a result, whenever he mentions God, he is never reluctant to mention Jesus in the same sentence. Because of this, Chris made this CWC-ism as a shorthand of "God and Jesus". This CWC-ism was the primary inspiration for the term "[[Godbear]]" to humorously refer to [[Leonard Bearstein]], who Chris has credited for his name change. Chris now no longer uses his CWC-ism, now referring to both God and Jesus as separate [[OCs]]. Chris now calls God "Emmanuelle".</blockquote>

;grand number of pounds
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' Extremely heavy.

<blockquote> ''Note: The chair weighs a '''grand number of pounds'''!<ref>[[Power]]</ref>'</blockquote>

Origin: Used in a video where he tried to prove his strength to [[Vanessa Hudgens]], who was actually [[Joshua Martinez]], by lifting an office chair.
</blockquote>

;grinds my gears
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used by Chris to indicate he is annoyed with something.

<blockquote>Firstly, I got your image in my mailbox; while I thank you for your fanart, No Offense, but I do not appreciate Sonichu drawn looking retarded; I feel it '''grinds my gears''' a bit.<ref>[[Mailbag_2#In_which_Chris_insults_someone_who_drew_a_picture_for_him]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>Something that '''grinds my gears''' is how people are not accepting of the neutral terms of "darling" or "dear".<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:OpenLetter.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this phrase almost every time he wanted to indicate he was annoyed and not outright [[angry]]. It is believed that Chris has picked up this archaic phrase from [[Family Guy]], specifically from a segment from the show called "What Really Grinds My Gears", where Peter is talking about things that annoy him or "grinds his gears".

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== H ==
|-
|

;hand-drawing
[[Image:Chris holding a pencil.png|thumb|Chris holding a pencil|200px]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An original drawn image, as opposed to a facsimile of that image.

<blockquote>''I mean, does that look like a printout to you? No! It's a '''HAND-DRAWING'''! It's the original hand-drawing of the back cover I constantly used! Among all the other hand drawings on my SHELF! In my BINDERS! IN THIS ROOM! In this house!''<ref>[[Chris dispels videogame rumors]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(verb)'' To sketch without the aid of digital technology, such as a computer.
[[File:Sonichuipaddrawing2020.jpg|thumb|A non-example made by Chris.]]
<blockquote>''No, actually, what I thought, is that you skip the '''hand-drawing''' and you draw everything on your PhotoShop with your computer mouse.''<ref>[[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 2]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's process for producing his drawings is to draw them, by hand, on physical paper, and then scan the paper into his computer and use image editing software to add effects like lettering or (for the purpose of breaking the fourth wall) photographs. He takes comfort in the belief that ownership of the original paper drawings is evidence of his authorship and will frequently cite this in defense against perceived thieves and trolls.

Chris also thinks that drawing on a computer instead of paper is an inferior method of producing artwork; he thinks the results look "blocky and low-resolution," which probably speaks more to his [[:File:179-ShineSchuChara.jpg|his own experience using MSPaint]] than the artistic quality of, for example, [[Asperchu]]. The fact that a digital artist like Alec Benson Leary is nonetheless ''using his hands'' does not seem to have occurred to Chris.
</blockquote>

;Haterade

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a metaphorical drink consumed by haters.
<blockquote>''Therefore, for all of you '''Haterade'''-Chugging “GET A JOB!” spouters out there, I suggest you Shut Up and enjoy your ability to settle in a cozy Office or wherever. For the rest of us, the worlds and the dimensions are our Offices, and we are doing our best, so we can reach our respective Fated Destined Promotions. But, I Digress. <ref>[[June 2019 social media posts#Fan art isn't thoughtful when it feeds into Chris's delusions]]</ref>''</blockquote>

<blockquote>''Put down the '''Haterade'''; this is not going against any rules, it is just the way it is. Hey! I still have my flaws, so I am definitely Not a Mary Sue type of OC. Also, if I wanted a shot glass of '''Haterade''', I would read most anything this dimension’s @realDonaldTrump ever wrote.''<ref>[[June 2019 social media posts#Fan art isn't thoughtful when it feeds into Chris's delusions]]</ref></blockquote></blockquote>

<blockquote>2. ''(noun, informal)'' excessive negativity, criticism, or resentment.

<blockquote>''This is in reference to the Nypical '''Haterade''' Comment of “Get A Job” that is not only thrusted upon me, but to everyone who is creative and have powerful in their own respective, individual rights.<ref>[[June 2019 social media posts#Fan art isn't thoughtful when it feeds into Chris's delusions]]</ref>''</blockquote>

Origin: Originally said by Lars in the 2010 [[Lars Call]]. Chris then used it almost nine years later. Likely a pun on the sports drink Gatorade.
</blockquote>
;[[heart level]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's way of measuring his emotional state

<blockquote>''100% Change the number to change your '''heart level''' and you can write a sentence to indicate how you feel.''<ref>[[Heart_level]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The concept of the "heart level" most likely stems from Chris's inability to understand emotions. As an alternative, Chris tends to use video game terms in order to measure such emotions.</blockquote>

;heal
<blockquote> 1. ''(verb)'' to ejaculate into someone.

<blockquote>''Had I Not '''healed''' her, she would be dead Late August.''<ref>[[Jail Letter - 16 November 2021]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris had somehow come to the conclusion that sex with his mother would make her more youthful, hence "healing" her.

</blockquote>

;heartsweet
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a [[sweetheart]].

<blockquote>''Rosey, as often as birds tweet, will you be my lovely '''heartsweet'''?''<ref>"[[Sonichu's Ode to Rosechu]]"</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Rearrangement of "sweetheart," possibly coined initially to provide more rhyming options in poetry. Chris primarily uses this term in Sonichu's dialogue, as the character's pet name for Rosechu. When speaking for himself, Chris tends to prefer "sweetheart," although the trolls use "heartsweet" in conversation with him.

''See also: [[sweetbolt]]''
</blockquote>

;heavyweight
[[File:Studalert.png|thumb|Chris does NOT look like Chris Farley]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Stockboy; person employed to move heavy objects and perform other menial labor.

<blockquote>If she gets pregnant and can't work, then I would be working. I would be working VERY HARD AND HEAVILY. [...] If I have to I would be, get one of the '''heavyweights''', that just moves the boxes around the, stock the shelves at a grocery store.<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' heavy.

<blockquote>I do not think Chris Farley looks like me at all, plus he was a LOT more '''heavyweight''' than me, and he was more wild than me.<ref>[[Jackie_e-mails_Part_2]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, as usual, has to repurpose words rather than use the existing words that already mean what he wants to say.
</blockquote>

;hedgehog-defensive (or hedgehog)
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Protecting oneself by curling up into a ball, just like a [[Sonic the Hedgehog|hedgehog]].

<blockquote>And I do understand all that. Believe me, and I need not be reminded of the worst part, but my '''hedgehog-defensive''' state and all of the tears and leaking mucus and whole body paralysis that happened to me then and there will haunt me in reminder of that.<ref>[[TooManyGames#Personal_space_talk]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>@MLPSilverQuill, having one’s own spirit killed is really not fun nor funny at all. And, believe me, I was literally in a worse huddled position than what I see here, and I FELT DEVASTATED at that moment. I went full '''Hedgehog Defensive''' and let my quills keep others back. It Hurts<ref>[[April_2019_social_media_posts#Hedgehog-defensive_state]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Replacing the likes of his [[Megatron pistol]] and his [[pepper spray]], Chris has adapted the habit of rolling up into a ball to protect himself from unwanted physical contact. The protective state he dubs "the hedgehog-defensive state" is most likely based off of the spin-dash attack from the Sonic the Hedgehog franchise, which the titular character uses to attack foes.</blockquote>

;[[hermaphrodite]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A derogatory term for passing transgender women, particularly those that haven't gotten bottom surgery.

<blockquote>''OH MY GOD!!! UGH!!! ARE YOU REALLY A '''HERMAPHRODITE'''?! I'm sorry, but that naughty picture just really shocked me and made me want to throw up. *deep breath* You do have a pretty face, but what happened just now is just like the movie, "The Crying Game", or the Thanksgiving episode of "The Cleveland Show".''<ref>[[Mailbag 25#It's a trap, again!]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' A person of an ambiguous gender, or who is female, who also has a penis.

<blockquote>If a '''Hermaphrodite''', I would raise it to be male regardless since it would not have any eggs anyway. Plus big bonus for (him) in sex with all women (lesbians included I would imagine).<ref>[[List of OkCupid Answers]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin:A misuse of the archaic term for intersex people. Chris appears to use this term to refer to someone he deems as "almost a woman", which is also shown when he referred to some of his female characters as "all female" when having their penises removed. Chris used this term when he noticed that the sweetheart [[Bailey Jay]] had a penis, and she explained to him her experiences as a transwoman. Chris also notably talked about how if he had a "hermaphrodite" as one of his offspring, he'd raise them as a boy. Chris's rather specific usage of this term also shows some of his prior beliefs about gender before he transitioned himself, such as who he deemed "male" or "female" in the first place.</blockquote>

;[[HEXBox]]
[[File:KillThatHexBawx.jpg|thumb|]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any of the video game consoles made by Microsoft, primarily the Xbox 360.

<blockquote>I never cared for the '''HEXBox''', and frankly it LACKS heavily in comparison to the Wii and PS3, PLUS YOU HAVE TO PAY THEIR FEES TO EVEN GO ONLINE OR DOWNLOAD DEMOS WITH IT.</blockquote>

Origin: Due to his [[Chris and brand loyalty|Brand Loyalty]], Chris had an irrational hatred for the XBox, simply because of how much you've got to pay for it to access some of its content<ref>[[Mailbag_5]]</ref>. Because Chris viewed this device as a curse to humanity, he tacked the word "hex", which is defined as being a curse, onto the original name of the console.</blockquote>

;hide behind/under his mother's skirt
<blockquote>1. ''(idiom)'' To behave in a cowardly, immature fashion.

<blockquote>''You come to me now. Come face me like a man. Unless you want to continue being called a cow-a quivelling coward who '''hides under his mother's skirt'''.''<ref>[[Challenge for Clyde II]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An antiquated phrase alluding to children literally hiding behind their mother's skirts when frightened.
</blockquote>

;hippo on one's head
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A predicament or unpleasant situation one is currently facing

<blockquote>''I'M WET. I'M COLD. THERE'S A HIPPO ON MY HEAD. AND CLEARLY, I'M NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO DO THIS ON MY OWN.''<ref>[[:File:JailArt15.jpg]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Someone's [[wikipedia:Hippocampus|hippocampus]]

<blockquote>''(EVERYBODY has a Hippo on their head; it is called the Hippocampus)''<ref>[[:File:FSM2.PNG]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris states in an e-mail directed at [[Regina Novakova]] that the phrase originated as an example of his [[random-access humor]], apparently as a pun of the word "hippocampus". Following from this, he would famously use the term in a [[HippoOnYourHead|Flipnote animation]] of a person literally getting crushed by a falling hippo, and then use the term several more times to describe the "weight" of the hippo on people's heads. He has lately used this term to describe his struggles with being in jail in a drawing sent to [[Praetor]].

</blockquote>

;[[homo]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A male homosexual

<blockquote>''Yes; the '''Homos''' I have heard from try to push their damn lifestyle in my face, and I DO NOT CARE FOR THAT AT ALL; What they do behind closed doors is None Of My Business, and I still Do Not Care to know a Damn Thing about it.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Common_Questions''</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' A non-passing transgender woman, particularly one Chris doesn't deem an authentic woman

<blockquote>''So I would- so I would say, good luck being a fake woman because you'll never be able to achieve true femdom! And you'll always be a dang homosexual male, 'cuz you're born that way, you gonna to stay that way pretty much even if you're gonna- if you're gonna have your dick either chopped off or tucked in! People are still gonna look at you so ill. In the majority of this country.''

''Anyway, that's my response for now.''

''Damn '''homo'''.''<ref>[[Response to ADF]]</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(adjective)'' homosexual

<blockquote>''Every one of you who thinks I'm '''homo''' and calls me that—-because I am not; I'm straight! I'm straight!''<ref>[[CWC's_Second_Message]]</ref></blockquote>

4. ''(adjective)'' relating to homosexuals

<blockquote>''Again, to reiterate the issue, THE GOD DAMN F***IN' '''Homo''' Ads MUST BE GONE!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Blog</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Before the [[Tomgirl Saga]], Chris had a hatred for homosexuals, out of fear that he'll become one himself. Even uttering words like "gay" and "homosexual" would make him uncomfortable. Chris also believed that those that strayed too much from their assigned gender at birth would turn out as being gay, which explains his defensiveness towards his more effeminate traits.</blockquote>

;[[Honest Content|honest]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' NSFW, containing adult content.

<blockquote>''Parental Advisory - VERY '''HONEST''' content.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic10P97.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris only has a slightly good understanding of what honesty is. However, Chris doesn't seem to understand when it's most appropriate to be honest. In his mind, to attract mates, he has to be honest all of the time, even if this includes instances of his sexual misadventures. Chris knows that he's not supposed to discuss such topics publically with ordinary people, so he would have to keep such things in secret. Therefore, in his mind, it would be the honest thing to do to discuss such actions.
</blockquote>

;Hurtful Truth Level
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A point at which honest criticism should be stopped so as to avoid hurting a person's feelings, regardless of the usefulness of the advice.

<blockquote>''And another thing, When constantly exceeding that '''Hurtful Truth Level''' to me, it feels like to me you're, and you may as well have, told me, "I Hate You! I Hate You!", and forget about me.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 23]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Said in an email to Jackie after she had pointed out several glaring flaws in Chris's lifestyle and personality. Rather than take her criticism to heart and improve himself, he got angry and defensive, wishing that she would show sympathy for him instead.
</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== I ==
|-
|

;I can feel the cosmos
[[File:I can feel the cosmos.jpg|thumb|right]]
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Statement of achievement and oneness with the universe.

<blockquote>''I promise, uh, three da—three pages a day, drawn or colored, but, also with the, uh, website, and God/Jesus's support, I feel like... we will be seeing many new—many new thing. The website will be better. '''I can feel the cosmos!''' Peace.''<ref>[[CWC Update 9 April 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Inspired by a line from the game Katamari Damacy, [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UmWxNFq6_3U "Oh, I feel it. I feel the cosmos."]
</blockquote>

;I got a fish

<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Claim that one owns a fish.

<blockquote>'''''I got a fish!''' Would ya like to make a wish?''
''I got a fish Would ya like to make a wish?''
''I got a fiiiiiiiiish! Would ya like to make a wish?''<ref>[[I_Got_A_Fish]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in a song of the same name, where Chris' [[random-access humor]] shines.</blockquote>

;I HATE ME TOO!!!

<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' A self-destructive phrase used to attempt to gain pity from trolls

<blockquote>''You know what, '''I HATE ME TOO!!!'''''<ref>[[You know what, I HATE ME TOO!!!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used as part of the title of a gallery found on Chris’s [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] Page.
</blockquote>

;[[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD]]!
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expressed angrily when you wish to break someone apart to kill them

<blockquote>''Jason Kendrick Howell... you BASTARD! BASTARD! You hacked into everything! You have driven me so beyond the wall, I can't even DESCRIBE it! YOU'RE LAUGHING NOW, BUT... '''I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD!''' Goodbye!''<ref>[[Jason Kendrick Howell message]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used as a [[death threat]] to [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] after he has hacked Sonichu.net.</blockquote>

;IBAChandler
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Abbreviation for "I be a chandler," i.e., "I am a person named 'Chandler.'"

<blockquote>''I am so sick of hearing that stupid name that somebody made up back when I had that '''IBAChandler''' account, and I be a Chandler. You know, "I" being myself, "B" standing for specifying who I am, and "Chandler" being my last name.''<ref>[[Show RESPECT to me, "C"CWC]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(proper noun)'' [[YouTube]] username in use by Christian Weston Chandler during his conflict with [[Liquid Chris]], leading trolls to accuse Chris of being an impostor of Liquid named [[Ian Brandon Anderson]].

3. ''(proper noun)'' Name of a ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' villain based upon Liquid Chris, ironically named for the real Chris's alias.

<blockquote>'''''I B A Chandler''', And I am here to copycatly sieze claim of you hedgehogs and this city from your absent mayor's domain.''<ref>[[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], page 79</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Inspired by [[Bob Chandler]]'s license plate, "I B MR C" ("I be Mister C.").<ref>[[CWC Update 29 July 2009]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;ID
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' Identifying.

<blockquote>''"That is the difference between Trans Gender and Vestites; '''ID''' as the other sex, and dressing like it, respectively"''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-335#post-2635076]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Possibly derived from ID meaning "Identification". </blockquote>

;[[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the extremely high probability that any woman Chris talks to is not [[CWC-isms#boyfriend-free|boyfriend-free]].

<blockquote>''With the '''infinitely high Boyfriend-Factor''', I am not fond of about 99.999999999996% of the total male population, with a margin-of-error of the 4 billionth of a percent (for about 100 men) of whom are okay acquaintences.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Megan_emails,_Aug-Dec_2007</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In general, Chris will almost never find a sweetheart.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sweetheart#Will_Chris_ever_have_a_Sweetheart.3F</ref> Already aware of this fact, but not willing to admit he's not at all attractive to most women, Chris blames it on the fact that most men are "jerks", and that one probably is already dating the woman he's trying to latch onto.</blockquote>
;information overload

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An act of spamming a webpage with pictures.

<blockquote>''I had thought the '''Information Overload''' would somehow Take Down the page; I admit that I was mistaken.<ref>[[Chris chan (CWCipedia)]]</ref>''</blockquote>

Origin: When Chris saw all of the explicit pictures on his Encyclopedia Dramatica page, he decided that the best course of action would be to spam the article with his own pictures. His logic was that if he kept doing this faster than the other editors, they'd have to delete the article, as they just wouldn't catch up with him.
</blockquote>

;instinction

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An instance of something being used a certain way.

<blockquote>''Also, I would have the secondary definition of the word "gay", being Homosexual, REMOVED from the word in the dictionaries, and all '''instinctions''' and sayings of the word will ONLY LEGALLY be used to mean HAPPY, as it was originally intended among songs like "Deck the Halls"''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_and_English</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Once again an instance of Chris trying to sound smart by using a word that sounds foreign to him, made up or otherwise. The end result, however, gives the impression that Chris isn't familiar with the word "instances".

</blockquote>

;intersex

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Relating to any gender identity outside of the gender binary.

<blockquote>''As a Tomgirl, '''Intersex''' of Female Soul with Male Body, and a Tranny Cross-Dresser, I am in full support for Human Equal Rights for everyone."''<ref>[[August 2014 Facebook Posts#Chris comes out... kinda]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used the term "intersex" interchangeably with the term "transgender" on many occasions, and also uses it to refer to Silvana, who actually is intersex. This gives the impression that when he talks about something being "intersex", he means that it isn't entirely "male" or "female".

</blockquote>

;[[Iron Curtain|iron curtain]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The mostly hermetic seal between [[Reality Cartoon]]s, such as the [[Chris and reality|real world]] and the fictional universe containing [[CWCville]], that prevents the [[Dimensional Merge]] from proceeding.

<blockquote>''But we are getting increasing magics, here, with more and more opening portals and growing tears and cracks in the '''iron curtain'''''.<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-11-19-chris-begs-while-posting-creepy-photo-of-barb.63305/post-5610374 Twitter, 19 November 2019]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Coined by Sir Winston Churchill in 1946 to refer to the limits of Russian intrusion into central Europe after the War. Chris presumably heard it once in [[Manchester High School|history class]] and forgot what it meant, unless he is comparing his fictional world to the [[Chris and censorship|Soviet Union]]. Alternatively it was fed to him by the [[Idea Guys]].

''See Also:'' [[#F|fourth wall]]</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== J ==
|-
|
;Jail of Fail
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. A rather unappealing jail to reside in.

<blockquote>''I have a temporary Soul Partner, a Holy Flame Type, you may Remember her (on her repentence tour) keeping me safe, well, not abused, and good, alongside Many (Good) Angels, Spirits, and OP allies in and around this '''Jail of Fail'''. We presently have a genuine Turkish Prayer Rug and a deck of Playing Cards from the Commisary, along with very much appreciated Sports Bra, Socks with no holes, Earplugs, and a few other goodies.''<ref>[[Jail Letter - 4 October 2021]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Said in a letter to the long-time orbiter and enabler, [[Kenneth Engelhardt]].

</blockquote>

;janekop
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. A female [[CWC-isms#jerkop|jerkop]].

<blockquote>''YOU'RE UNDER ARREST. SO SAYS THIS '''JANEKOP'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Feelings_of_the_election_results</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Whereas the term "jerkop" is a portmanteau of the CWC-ism "jerk" and the word "cop", janekop is a portmanteau of the words "jane" and "cop". The word "jane" is a slang word for "woman". <ref>https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/jane</ref>
</blockquote>
;[[JERKS|jerk]]
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. Any male other than Chris and his dad in general, particularly those that Chris dislikes, especially one that gets in the way of his LoveQuest.

<blockquote>''On the flip side, I feel discomfort around men, because they can be such mean and cruel '''jerks'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_Girls</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The term "jerk" is generally defined as "A person with unlikable or obnoxious qualities and behavior, typically mean, self-centered or disagreeable".<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/jerk#Etymology_1</ref> As stated in the quote above, Chris believes that all men to be cruel, selfish, and overall unlikeable. Therefore, he views almost all men as jerks.
</blockquote>
;[[Jerkop|jerkop]]
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. An official of the law.

<blockquote>''I would have left peacefully, in fact, I was ready to go, but I had a prepared speech to say to them stupid '''Jerkops'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Get-Tar_Region</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Since Chris views most officers of the law as jerks, due to how often they'd thwart his LoveQuest, the term is a portmanteau of "jerk" and "cop". Possibly a pun on the word "jerkoff", which is defined as being "a contemptible man".<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/jerk--off</ref></blockquote>

;[[For Julie's Eyes Only|JULAAAAAAAY]]
[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|thumb|Chris preparing for hanky-panky with Julie, using a blow-up doll no less]]
<blockquote>''(interjection)'' 1. An expression used by Chris to indicate how much he'd love having sex for the first time with [[Julie]]

<blockquote>"Oh, Julie...'''JULAAAAAY''', JULAAAAAAAAAAY!!!"<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/For_Julie%27s_Eyes_Only</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris first shouted this infamous CWC-ism in the video [[For Julie's Eyes Only]]. He originally intended to share this video privately with [[Julie]], (unaware that 'she' was actually a 13-year-old male troll), to show what their first date would amount to, despite this breaking his Three Date Rule. Seeing how Chris was somewhat of a porn junkie,<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Chris%27s_Adam_%26_Eve_purchases</ref><ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Miyamoto_emails#Chris_Sets_the_Record_STRAIGHT</ref> Chris must have picked up that during sexual intercourse, one of the people may shout the name of the other person in order to "spice up" the orgy. When the video got leaked soon after, the term started to be used by trolls humorously, to the point where [[weens]] started using the phrase in excess, making the CWC-ism lose its luster.</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;jumping the shark
<blockquote>''(verb)'' 1. To start over from scratch

<blockquote>"I am moving out of this Twitter into creating a new one I created, @CPU_CWCSonichu. New and renewed followers will all be screened by my ally, as to keep out the Haters and Harassers. Starting up new and fresh. '''Jumping The Shark''' from old to new"<ref>[[Misc texts#CPU_CWCSonichu]]</ref>

</blockquote>

Origin: The term "jumping the shark" humorously refers to the point where something once popular which has begun to lose its viewer base pulls an extreme stunt in hopes of garnering attention. The term comes from an episode of the television show ''Happy Days'', where Fonzie literally jumped over a shark while water skiing. Ironically enough, despite Chris' misuse of the phrase, many people could easily say that the comic of Sonichu and Chris as a person have "jumped the shark" several times, especially with [[Retroactive continuity in Sonichu|retcons]] and- of course- Chris's change into a [[Transgender|transwoman]].

</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== K ==
|-
|
;kawaii
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' cute or adorable.

<blockquote>''That look really suits you; you look so '''kawaii''' and cool.😊''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1209184205776797697</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The mainstream Japanese word typically used to describe cute subculture. Chris has used this word in almost all cases where he describes anything he thinks is cute and cuddly, more so in recent times, where the use of this word is no longer taken seriously, and seen as more of a joke to poke fun at [[Joshua Wise|weeaboos]].</blockquote>

;[[Kick the Autistic]]
[[File:CWC gets kicked.jpg|thumb|A self-administered kick]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' America's favorite game

<blockquote>''I REALLY WANTED THAT TRIP SO I COULD HAVE A CHANCE TO IMPRESS MY SWEETEST MEGAN AND POSSIBLY FULFILL MY DREAM OF GETTING MARRIED AND SOON HAVE A DAUGHTER NAMED CRYSTAL. YET NOW I, A FRUSTRATED HIGH-FUNCTIONALLY AUTISTIC 25-YEAR OLD VIRGIN, HAVE BEEN BALLZ-BROKEN LIKE I HAVE THROUGH A BIG CHUNK OF MY LIFE IN AMERICA'S FAVORITE GAME, '''"KICK THE AUTISTIC!"''' *sigh*''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chop_Chop_Master_Onion%27s_Rap_Showdown</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Any action which involves doing something to Chris that he doesn't like

<blockquote>''And if you have so much free time to play the cruelest game of '''"KICK THE AUTISTIC"''', then you CAN and SHOULD put the time to better use; volunteer for a social chore; take up the culture in tasteful art; go out and socialize.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica#21_January</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(noun)'' Any form of discrimination towards Chris for being [[autism|autistic]].

<blockquote>''And so, the world continues to play the world's favorite game of "'''Kick the Autistic'''". I'm gonna need all the luck I can get. *Game Over*''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Vivitheg%27s_AIM_chat</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris had this paranoid idea that the whole world is going against him and his goals, solely due to his autism. In this sense, the fact that so many people supposedly wanted to thwart his goals made him feel like he was being "kicked" around. </blockquote>

;Kra-Kow!

<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase indicating that Chris roasted someone.

<blockquote>''What? I’m just telling the truth. I hear and see WORSE shit from you Haters. At this point, I’d rather look back in that memory than PTSD over y’all’s Hate-Filled content. '''Kra-Kow!'''''<ref>https://mobile.twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1231269768310722560</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. Most likely inspired by the sound lightning makes.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== L ==
|-
|

;Laughs Under Lucricities
<blockquote>
1. ''(backronym)'' backronym for "LULZ"

<blockquote>''Although, F.Y.I., "LULZ" is short for "'''Laughs Under Lucricities'''"''<ref>[[Chris chan (CWCipedia)]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Any form of humor made at Chris' expense

<blockquote>''... your bully of a boyfriend is the Original Author of the "Chris-chan" page that was put up there for the "LULZ", "'''Laughs Under Lucricities'''". Which I don't have to tell you is not only mean and cruel, the page is HORRIBLE''<ref>Chris emails 2008</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: It's likely that Chris first heard of lulz on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]-<ref>[[Chris E-mails 2008#August]]</ref> the slogan of which is "in lulz we trust"- and thus forever associated the term with trolling. Originally he would simply say "LULZ" ''ought'' to stand for "Laughs Under Lucricities," but he soon began implying that it already does.<ref>[[Chris_E-mails_2008|Email]] from Chris to Robert Simmons V on 12 August 2008</ref> Lucricities is seemingly a combination of "lucrid" (another non-word with apparent negative connotations that Chris has used<ref>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 48]]</ref>) and "ludicrous" but falls short of being a portmanteau and is more like the result of a head-on collision of the English language.

</blockquote>

;lesbian soul
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' What Chris believes to be his true [[Chris and sexuality|sexuality]].

<blockquote>''I am an all-around, good natured, high-functioning autistic, Female '''Lesbian Soul''', and Transwoman, artist, gamer and creative type.''<ref>https://www.facebook.com/pg/cwcville/about/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: When Chris declared himself transgender, he continued to be attracted to exclusively to biological females regardless of their own sexual orientation.<ref>[[Women Only Need Apply - No STD's]]</ref> Thus, Chris became a lesbian. As a way to assert to detractors that he was a lesbian, Chris cited himself as having a "lesbian soul" despite previously living as a straight man for thirty years.

 </blockquote>
;level-up king
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' Master of [[card games]].

<blockquote>''There must have been about 6 people including Chris and myself at the tourney and when he won he was jumping up and down a yelling "I'm the '''level up king'''!"''<ref>[[Mimms and Lucas Q&A#Follow-up]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Before his permanent ban from the [[GAMe PLACe]], Chris would play games of Pokemon and Yu-Gi-Oh with some of the other customers. Despite his sick obsession with both games, Chris never developed any type of strategy to compete with other players, making it very difficult to succeed at the game, even when he played against small children. Eventually, when the shop was just down to six people, which included Chris, the manager, [[Daniel Mimms|Mimms]], and [[Lucas]], Chris did win a match against a relatively new player, and excitedly jumped up and down at this accomplishment like a child. Along with this, he shouted the phrase "I AM THE LEVEL-UP KING!"</blockquote>

;like, you know
<blockquote>1. ''(discourse particle)'' Space filler during sentence.

<blockquote>''I don't want too much conflict to happen, '''like, you know'''. You wouldn't want too much conflict to happen, like, you know. I mean-like, you know, between you and him any further. Yeah.''<ref>[[I Love You Kacey]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris' speech consists mostly of uh's, um's, and other vocalized pauses.</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;live from home once again
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' An introduction stating that one is recording themselves from their home.

<blockquote> ''Hello everybody this is Christine Chandler coming to you '''live from home once again''' and we're going to talk about the recent and more obvious topic, of "The Dimensional merge". Yes! This dimension! Right here! 1218. Is going to be merged with our sister dimension "C197" where all of our s- where most of our superheroes, super-villains, OCs, and what have you, and other characters, consisted, have been existing and co-existing. Yep!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Dimensional_Merge_Announcements</ref></blockquote>

Origin: This phrase became Chris's typical means of starting his videos since late 2015, replacing the famous Captain's Log. Although it is sometimes used appropriately (i.e. livestreams), Chris uses the phrase even in prerecorded videos that are not, in fact, live.</blockquote>

;[[Love Quest]]
<blockquote>1.''(noun)'' Chris's former on-going search for a sweetheart.

<blockquote>''As for Wes, I blame all of these happenings on him. If he had not taken my life-long friend away from me, I might have a Pretty Girlfriend today. And I would not have had to set out on endeavoring '''LOVE QUEST'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Since attending [[PVCC]], Chris has embarked on a 15-year long quest to find his true love. Chris constantly failing to achieve this goal was what gave this CWC-ism its name.</blockquote>

;lovehog
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A lover in a relationship between two [[CWC-isms#E|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]].

<blockquote>''Also, I have finished the drawing for you, and I have shown off the Original '''LoveHog''' Couple's Wedding Rings, and their three children: Cerah Rosey, Robbie Sonee and (Shiney Rosey) Christine Rosey.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Katie_Bay_E-mails_4</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A portmanteau of "love" and "hedgehog".</blockquote>

;lucricities
<blockquote>1. ''(pl. noun)'' lurid acts or motivations

Origin: Chris completely made this word up, presumably based on "lucrid," which may in turn be based on the actual word "lurid." According to Chris, the word "lulz" can mean either "Laughs at my expense" or "Laughs under lucricities," so presumably the two contexts are equivalent.
</blockquote>

;lucrid
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' obscene, profane, wicked
<blockquote>''And promoting the hatred, and...drawing such loose—such '''lucrid''' mockeries is not gonna further the story plot or have anything new created, or even gonna help in any way...''<ref name=csm>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. Possibly a corruption of "lurid," given the context. Alternatively, it might be a corruption of "ludicrous." Chris has used this word to describe the homoerotic/dickgirl art on the ED page, as well as the fan comic in which he was depicted as a man-baby. Ironically, even before Chris used this word
</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== M ==
|-
|

;make one's own peeps n' poops

<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' to urinate and deficate at the same time

<blockquote>''Uh, actually, uh, actually Crystal is uh, doing, is uh, doing her preschool homework, and uh, Reg-, and Reginald's been uh, been a messy lil' babychild! '''Made his lil' peeps n' poops'''! And he went, and he went weewee all over the bathroom.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/PlayingHouse''</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from a clip of Family Guy, where Herber the Pervert is letting his dog out to "make his pees n' poops". <ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZtlwEfZEmrg</ref></blockquote>

;Mama
[[File:Christine and pikachu.jpg|right|thumb|Mama Christine with a [[Sonee]].]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' What Chris refers to himself as when roleplaying as one of his [[OCs]].

<blockquote>''I am going to some shopping and donating amongst the artists affected by the COVID virus of this Dimension, on behalf of '''Mama''', Chris Chan Sonichu. Thank you, again, to the individual who bought the book set recently. Still waiting for the set of #TSSSF cards to sign and offer.''<ref>https://mobile.twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1251259373810302977</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes himself to be a parent to his characters. Since he identifies as a woman, he has given himself the alias “Mama”. Chris further shows his lack of self-awareness by not realizing how awkward it is to have anyone, even his own characters (who are presumably teenagers) refer to him as such.</blockquote>

;[[Manajerks|manajerk]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a store manager

<blockquote>'' two Manajerks asked me to leave, because they said that I was loitering; I was NOT!''<ref>[[CWC's Diary#2005]] (20 July)</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A portmantau of "manager" and "jerk". </blockquote>

;[[Mary Lee Walsh|Mary Lee Walshing]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' akin to to Mary Lee Walsh

<blockquote>''She has proven herself to be a cold-hearted, uncaring, uncompassionate, lack-of-understanding, bigoted, discriminating, selfish, '''Mary Lee Walshing''', Witch Bitch!''<ref>[[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Chris Expresses His Outrage for Walmart]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's ongoing resentment against his old college dean has led him to compare a Wal-Mart manager who banned him from her store to Walsh. He apparently fails to comprehend that the "-ing" suffix is generally associated with verbs.</blockquote>

;mashed potato grenade

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a [[Wikipedia:Stielhandgranate|Stielhandgranate]], a special German hand grenade with a handle.

<blockquote>''I want to just kill him; destroy his goody-two-shoes nature, soul, heart and all that shit my '''mashed potato grenade''' could shatter, but leave his body in tact, so I'm not committed fro murder.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2013_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in a Facebook post sent to [[Megan Schroeder]] accusing her of his [[List of places that have banned Chris|ban]] from the [[The GAMe PLACe|Game Place]], where he [[Chris and reality|makes paranoid claims]] of what she, [[Mimms]], [[Lucas]], and [[Snyder]] were thinking that day. A corruption of "potato masher grenade", a common English nickname of the Stielhandgranate<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stielhandgranate</ref>.</blockquote>

;[[Mass debating|mass debate]]
[[File:Mass_Debate.jpg|right|thumb|Massive Debating]]
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' to pleasure one's self; to masturbate

<blockquote>''I've actually done it '''mass debating''' to myself so many times, even with a hunk of - even with an inflatable plastic woman...''<ref>[[Kacey Call 7]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: This particular euphemism comes from Chris's tendency to refrain from using inappropriate language, as well as his unusual variation of a southern accent combined with a minor speech impediment.</blockquote>

;mental block

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's autism

<blockquote>''And, uh, during my high school years, I was used to being surrounded by… girls… in my circle, and after having to, uh, leave them I felt ever so lonesome. And, after the stress from some of the people—people at PVCC, as well as my '''mental block''' of autism, it became hard from me to approach gir—approach the girls like I used to.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_Chan%27s_Public_Announcement</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris refers to his [[autism]] as a "mental block" because he believes the term refers to a disability. In his case, his supposed disability to socialize with girls. In reality, a mental block is the inability to remember a specific thing at a given moment. <ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mental_block</ref></blockquote>

;Meta

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' being able to break through the fourth wall.

<blockquote>''Also, there is no problem with breaking your own fourth wall with us from your dimension, here. Go '''Meta'''. We are certainly Meta with and for you all as well.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1316825180610670592</ref></blockquote>

Origin: From the Greek prefix meaning "after" or "beyond". Chris views all cartoons as being on a dimension higher than our own. According to him, being able to break through the iron curtain entails obtaining a higher mode of consciousness.
</blockquote>

;mislabel

<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' to put a label on Chris or any of his creations in a way he doesn't like, regardless of truth
2. ''(noun)'' a label of such slanderous nature; see also "misunderstanding"
<blockquote>''I am NOT a Dictator. Why are you giving me an even WORSE '''Mislabeling''' than the Homosexual Mislabelings? Why do YOU have to be so bored that you have to make up NEW mislabelings to try and deface me over and over again? ''<ref>[[Common Questions#1_February_2010]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Just about everywhere. He appears to use this term as often as the word "slanderous". Curiously, the redundancy "ill-mislabeling" (as if there were any other kind) has appeared once.<ref>[[CWC Blog#28_December_2009]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;misspeak

<blockquote>1.''(verb)'' to lie

<blockquote>''Sometimes, I have '''misspoke'''. But you are more important to me than ANYTHING. Believe me! I swear. Hand to God. And on my Bible. I'd have to go look for it.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/ToJackie</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Instead of accepting that someone has called him out on [[Lies|his bullshit]], Chris prefers to say he "misspoke". Needless to say, no one has fallen for this ploy.

</blockquote>

;misunderstanding

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a deliberate view that contradicts Chris; see also "mislabel"
<blockquote>''*AND WE WILL NOT TAKE THE '''MISUNDERSTANDINGS''', THE MISLABELS, AND ALL THE LIKE SITTING DOWN!!!''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|1=Issue_9/Page_39|2=Issue 9 Page 39}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Misappropration. Note that it is not, as in reality,<ref>[http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/misunderstanding Merriam-Webster Dictionary, "misunderstanding"]</ref> a mistaken notion (alternatively a dispute) based on faulty information, but a malicious action worthy of [[tard rage]]. Apparently a slanderous troll has to actively "misunderstand" Chris. Also, Chris has used the related word "misunderstood" (participle adjective) as an insult, not realizing that if the troll misunderstood (transitive verb) him, ''Chris'' would be the one that was misunderstood (participle adjective).<ref>[[Mailbag 39#Rosechu_the_transwoman|Mailbag 39]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;modnar
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' random

<blockquote>''I may be '''modnar''', but I try not to be offensive, and if I do, then I am sorry. I can not please Everyone.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter</ref></blockquote>

Origin: "Random", spelt backwards.</blockquote>

;[[Monthly tugboat|monthly tugboat]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's Social Security Disability Service

<blockquote>"I'm getting by livin' with my folks and a '''monthly tugboat.'''"<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Monthly_tugboat#References_by_Chris</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris apparently coined the term "Monthly Tugboat" due to a comparison he makes between gaining money through his SSDS vs. winning the lottery. In his mind, winning the lottery is like riding a "Luxury ship that can easily sink", while gaining money from the government is the same as getting cargo from a ship pulled by a tugboat. <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/BlueSpike_Skype_Logs_12</ref></blockquote>

;morrow

<blockquote> 1. ''(noun)'' Synonym for moral.

<blockquote>''The '''Morrow''' remains: Look up to whoever and whatever you like as your childhood hero like no one else is watching you; remain proud with your choice and preference. 💜⚡️''<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts#Chris supports playing with whatever toys you want]]</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: Unknown, possibly a corruption of the word moral. Used exclusively by Magi-Chan during Chris month-long twitter roleplay in August and September of 2019.
</blockquote>

;Mother Nature errand
<blockquote>1. ''(idiom)'' The bodily urge to either [[Piss|urinate]] or [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|defecate]].

<blockquote>''All right, well, ladies, it’s been fun, but I gotta split and take care of ah... y’know, a '''Mother Nature errand'''.''<ref>[[Sonichu Home Club]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A peculiar take on the idiom "call of nature".
</blockquote>

;[[Muscle bra|muscle bra]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A sports bra used for covering a man's bare chest.

<blockquote>''And you know what, I highly recommend this to every dude who goes around shirtless: wear a '''muscle bra'''. Because nobody, and I mean nobody wants to see your dog-gone ugly pecs, they're so ugly and repulsive, ugh... creeps everybody out.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Clyde_is_Weaker_than_Water</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Contributing to his previous fear of the homos, Chris also had a fear of seeing the bare chests of other men out of fear that it'll make him gay. He therefore suggested that men cover their chests under penalty of the law. Chris most likely adapted this name due to some weird association he makes between muscles and sports.</blockquote>

;my two bolts and a heart

<blockquote>1. ''(idiom)'' Chris's opinion or takeaway on something.

<blockquote>''Okay. I get serious creep and dark vibrations from all of this. I mean, you may do as you will if it feels right with you. Just '''my two bolts and a heart'''.''<ref>[[April_2021_social_media_posts#Dark_vibrations]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's version of the idiomatic expression "my two cents", referencing his emoji signature "⚡️💙⚡️". Chris has also used a similar phrase before while roleplaying as Sonichu, shortening it to just "my two bolts."<ref>[[Sonichu reads and critiques a Fanfic by The Crimson Libertarian]]</ref></blockquote>

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== N ==
|-
|

;[[naïve]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' dumb, lacking intelligence.

<blockquote>''You are such a cowardly, '''naïve''', retarded, individual.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Calls_Out_Three_Na%C3%AFve_YouTubers</ref ></blockquote>

Origin: Chris only seems to understand the most simplified definition of the word. In general terms, the word "naïve" is defined as "showing a lack of experience, wisdom, or judgment."<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/naive</ref> However, in Chris's mind, the word is used to "question one's intelligence". Despite his distaste for the use of the word on him, this turns out to be a commonly used insult by Chris.</blockquote>

[[File:FRENCH-NAVY-CameraObscura.jpg|thumb|Chris travels to France]]
;navy
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' semen.

<blockquote>''You know that, uh—first off, uh, the one... with the '''navy''' being drunk. Yeah. Som—yeah. A b—a—i—a—it's a good idea somet—uhhh... it's a... it's a good idea. But, uh, you know, you don't have to do it if you don't like it, but, uh... I recycle my own semen''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Play on words, i.e, a navy is a collection of seamen/semen.

''See also: [[CWC-isms#C|Comeuppance]]''
</blockquote>

;nearly same
<blockquote>1. ''(Adjective)'' Similar.

<blockquote>''And so I killed about- killed about twenty miles round trip for gas to go find her house. But it turns out that was a troll posing as that girl. [sighs] THE VOICES SOUNDED '''NEARLY SAME'''.''<ref>[[For Chris]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;negligent

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[negligee]]

<blockquote>So, I went onto Adam & Eve's website, and ordered three garments, and a transparent robe. One of the '''negligent''' is about exactly on what I had drawn onto myself.<ref>[[WCT DMs#Sexy negligee]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An obvious mispelling of "negligee", a form of lingerie.

</blockquote>

;neurotypically hindered
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Lacking the proper mindset or intelligence to understand Chris' world building, just by being normal.

<blockquote>''Go ahead; that Is what happened that day, and they did not mind it much. To mock us makes you all Soo '''Neurotypically Hindered'''.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1203938198424035329</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes that the term "neurotypical" refers to having average brain function, rather than lacking any sort of [[Autism|autistic]] traits.<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1207129697752141824</ref> He believes that if one only possesses average intelligence, it makes it impossible for them to fully accept his fantasy world, thus claiming it as a "hindrance".

</blockquote>

;neutral
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' platonic.

<blockquote>''I apologize, but I meant the term '''neutrally''', and I never meant anything from that.''<ref>[[LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And One More thing, Darling!... Talluah Bankhead would be Insulted with your response to the term's '''neutral''' usage. Hmpf!'<ref>[[LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes words like "darling" and "dear", are gender neutral terms. Because of this, he assumes that if he claims that he used it in a "neutral" way, people will know he's not using the term in a romantic tone.

</blockquote>
<blockquote>2. ''(adjective)'' politically centrist or nonpartisan.

<blockquote>''He is a communist! And we do not like communists within this country! We are Republican, Democrat or ''' neutral'''... And I am '''neutral''', so I can go either way, but I do not exactly care much for communism!'<ref>[[Re-Calling Ahuvia]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Niggo|niggo]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An African-American person.

<blockquote>''Chris: [sighs, raises his voice] BILLY MAYS IS THE NEW MAYER OF CWCVILLE!</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Max: Yeah, and also say that "Christian Chandler will be thrown in jail!" CWCville Jail.''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Chris: And Christian Chandler will be thrown in CWCville Jail.''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Max: "Where he will be raped by a bunch of niggers!" Say this one really loud.''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Chris: Where he will be raped by a bunch of '''niggos'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Julie_Reveals_Herself</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A bastardization of the racial slur "nigger". This minced oath was used only once after [[BlueSpike]] persuaded Chris to say: "''BILLY MAYS is the new mayor of CWCville, and Christian Chandler will be thrown in CWCville jail, where he will be raped by a bunch of niggers''". Chris decided to repeat this phrase, but he also thought he could "outsmart" BlueSpike by replacing "niggers" with "niggos" in order to avoid saying the offending word directly. Ironically, a whole year after the incident, Chris referred to [[Surfshack Tito]] as a "nigger" [[Chris Drops the N-Bomb|several]] [[Surfshack Tito E-mails|times]], despite not even knowing what he looks like.</blockquote>

;No fucking shit / N.F.S.
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' obviously

<blockquote>''[[The WCT]]: Don't let [[Jacob Sockness|Jacob]] get close to you ever.''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Chris: '''No fucking shit'''.''<ref name=wctdms>[[WCT DMs]]</ref></blockquote>
<blockquote>''The WCT: The Sockness Saga will be something to watch when Geno gets there. ''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Chris: '''N.F.S.'''.''<ref name=wctdms></ref></blockquote>

Origin: Another instance of Chris attempting to add unnecessary emphasis onto his writing.</blockquote>

;[[Nombie-zazis|nombie-zazis]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' zombie nazis

<blockquote>''Anyway, as for the medical study, and this will require your aid, Magi-Chan. In June of 2015, the scientists have found the gene-like molecule which makes a person turn...ugh..'''nombie-zazis'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Son10revp3.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Replacement for homosexuals and homosexuality in the revised [[Sonichu 10]].</blockquote>

;not-troll
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a victim of trolling.

<blockquote>''Consider who does more harassing, which do you block? <ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-278#post-2549629]]</ref>
<blockquote>
*Every Foul-Mouth Troll
*The '''Not-Troll''' they follow</blockquote>''</blockquote>

Origin: In Chris's mind, only two types of people exist on [[the Internet]], those who are trolls, and those who are victims of trolling. Because the person being trolled is supposedly '''not''' a troll, they are a "not-troll". Chris eventually deleted the aforementioned post, and reposted it, replacing "not-troll" with "victim" to clarify what he was referring to in the first place.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-279</ref></blockquote>

;[[Noviophobia|noviophobia]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the fear that someone you want to date is already dating someone else.

<blockquote>''His one fault, that has restricted him from finding the Ms. Right, he had a major case of '''Noviophobia''', where he is afraid to even approach most ladies, because he thought that they were all already paired up with “A Jerk.”''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_News_Dash</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Because Chris was so frustrated with so many [[CWC-isms#J|jerks]] stealing his potential mates, Chris decided that his envy and hatred of men was a real phobia. Thus, overconfident in his ability to speak [[Spanish]], formed the word "noviophobia" by using the Spanish word ''novio'', meaning "boyfriend", and the English suffix, -phobia, meaning fear . </blockquote>
</blockquote>

|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== O ==
|-
|
;[[OC]]
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation, noun)'' Original Creator. A god or deity, including [[Chris and religion#Delusions of godhood|Chris himself]].

<blockquote>''I recall that there was a Mythos about me online: myself, Chris Chan, I; I was an '''OC''' in my own stories; was I Real in this “Reality” that is Dimension 1218? And then I was confirmed in late 2007 with that blurry photograph of me in a moment of great shock and stress.''<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(abbreviation, noun)'' Original Creation. A resident of a [[Reality Cartoon|cartoon dimension]]

<blockquote>''I am pleased to announce from this collab piece alone, we have ten Sonichu/Rosechu '''OCs''' confirmed for the OC Expansion Packs of our #TSSSF set of cards, and then some, as I’m also delegating with my other friends as well. This is going to be a massive and lovely OC party!''<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Short for ''original character'', a common term used by fanfiction authors for characters invented by themselves and used in their stories yet not present in the source material. Chris believes that fictional characters [[Chris and reality|really]] exist in other [[dimensions]], and under the [[Idea Guys]]' influence was convinced they are deserving of worship. Beginning with the Console Patron Units from ''[[Hyperdimension Neptunia]]'', he has since generalised this idea on his own.</blockquote>

;OH! MY AXELS! (or OW! MY AXELS!)
[[File:Axels2.jpg|thumb|right]]
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expression of pain in one's axles (the central shafts of rotating wheels or gears in a machine).

<blockquote>'''''OOOHHHHHH!!!! MY AXELS!!!!!'''''<ref>[[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Written for [[Ghostbusters|Ghost Buggy]]'s cameo in [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]], based upon the character's tendency to complain about its aching mechanical components.</blockquote>

;OH, MY CHRIS CHAN!
[[File:CWC GoPony reaction.jpg|thumb|150px|right]]
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Exclamation uttered by Chris during his phases of holding a [[messiah complex]] and [[role-play]]ing as [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]].

<blockquote>''Why the Hell would you read that personal shit about [[Chris|Mama]] with [[LoveYouLongTime E-mails, 2013-2014#Chris fucks himself|the penis thing]]? '''[[CPU Blue Heart|Oh, My Chris Chan]]!'''''<ref>[[Chris-Chan: A Comprehensive History]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Typed as a comment for the [[Chris-Chan: A Comprehensive History]] episode involving an embarrassing email.</blockquote>

;old-fashioned<blockquote>
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Holding a belief that may be considered politically incorrect.

<blockquote>''But still, call me '''old-fashioned''' but, I'd rather be- I would not- I'd uh- I'd definitely wouldn't uh... NOT BLACK. Not black.''<ref>[[Mumble_4]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''My father is '''OLD FASHIONED'''; he NEVER gives thought to homos, and he HATES them too.''<ref>[[IRC (03 January 2009)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to regard most traditional beliefs and rituals to be offensive to the general public.

2. ''(adjective)'' Dating back to the 1980s.

<blockquote>''Ah, you can tell this is an '''old-fashioned''' Lego set on account of this—the old-fashioned "LegoLand" on the corner.''<ref>[[Song of Christian]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to believe anything that's been made more than 5 years ago is as old as dirt.

3. ''(adjective)'' Preferring real women over waifus.
<blockquote>''Nothing against waifus and the people who have them, but I Never Really understood the appeal and concept of making out a character from a show who is Dimensions Away from your own league to be any sort of a significant other to you. I’m more '''old-fashioned''' towards real women.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/954587249622077440</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. However, Chris seemed to use this word like this because he's aware it isn't considered customary to be sexually attached to fictional characters over real people.

</blockquote>

;ounce of vagina

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Essentially Chris's way of saying "I'll at least lose my virginity at some point".

<blockquote>''And, as for you, Jason Kendrick Howell… as sure as I am to get at least one '''ounce of vagina''', I have your number, and you're going down!''<ref>[[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Obviously confused when it comes to both euphemisms and basic units of measure, Chris has stated that he is sure to get "at least one ounce of vagina" within his lifetime.<ref>[[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)]]</ref> In the years since, he's gotten at least [[Mia Hamm|two]] [[Barbara Chandler|ounces]].
</blockquote>
;outercourse
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the act of stimulating someone else's genitals.

<blockquote>''I understand. You may or may not have had much exposure to sexual images as I've had, so the idea of a "hand job" (which was the act drawn there) as part of '''outtercourse''''' [sic]'' (versus intercourse) was a surprise to you.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Megan_emails,_2008#Chris_thinks_she_was_scarred_because_she_doesn.27t_know_much_about_sex</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The word "outercourse" is actually another way to refer to dry humping.<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/outercourse</ref> In Chris's mind however, outercourse simply refers to sex which involves touching another's genitals, because the action happen outside of the body.</blockquote>

;overinexperienced
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Being overly inexperienced.

<blockquote>''My Body is sexually overinexperienced, and Starved.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/May_2020_social_media_posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: It apparently didn't occur to Chris that sexual inexperience isn't the least bit comparative, at least not in the context where he intended to use this word.
</blockquote>

;overpowered (or OP)
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' A disproportionate amount of strength, which is worn as a badge of honor.

<blockquote>''If I was a neuro-typical mind, as opposed to '''overpowered''' psychic, I’d have gotten dizzy. ''<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A term normally meant to refer to imbalance in game mechanics. Chris adopted the term at some point during or after the [[Idea Guys]] saga as a way to brag about his nonexistent psychic abilities and ludicrously powerful fictional characters.</blockquote>

{{clear}}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== P ==
|-
|

;parkay
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' an epic style of running

<blockquote>''Hello there, fans! It's Christian Chandler here, live at the downtown mall, where for the Sonichu franchise and city of CWCville, and everything like that, I'm gonna do a '''parkay''' from this point all the way down to the gara--parking garage where, at the end, we will get a nice view of the tent-style theater that's down there where events are held.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_Edge</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In the video [[Sonichu's Edge]], Chris calls his style of running "parkay". Chris confused his running as a form of parkour, an acrobatic sport typically used in the military as a means of practicing the navigation of a complex environment without the use of equipment. <ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parkour</ref>. Given Chris's [[speech impediment]], the word "parkour" somehow came out as "parkay".
</blockquote>

;[[Parody|parody]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any work that "borrows" characters, plots, or styles from other pieces of fiction, whether infringing International [[Chris and copyright|Copyright]] Law or otherwise.

<blockquote>''Any names, or persons, illustrated in any of the Sonichu Comics, except that of Christian Weston Chandler, that may seem similar to anyone in real life, are purely coincidental, or otherwise '''parodic'''.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=File:Issue_8_Cover.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's understanding of what constitutes as a parody most likely comes from his interest in shows like [[Family Guy]] and [[Excel Saga]], the former of which use copyrighted characters to make jokes around them, and the latter of which parodied various clichés found in anime. In his mind, because those shows can get away with using such characters and scenes, that gives him an excuse to do the same thing in his comics as long as he states it's being done as a "parody". Ironically, Whenever Chris spoted an actual parody, he thought that the characters from the original work were being defaced.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Parody#Chris_does_not_understand_the_concept_of_parody</ref></blockquote>

;peanut
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Someone who disregards you, or otherwise does not accept you for who you are.

<blockquote>''So you enjoy it, just do it—don't worry about other people's opi—pinions. Because, uh, compared to the other schools, those people who disregard you are just total '''peanuts'''. And I'm not talkin' Charlie Brown; I'm talkin' 'bout the little nuts after the shells. The real peanut gallery. That would be peanuts, wouldn't it?''<ref>[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Apparently derived from "[[Wikipedia:peanut gallery|peanut gallery]]," a term used to describe the hecklers in an vaudeville audience who would throw peanuts at a performer. Chris's own spin on this concept is to dismiss such hecklers as being insignificant like literal peanuts.
</blockquote>

;[[Pedofork|pedofork]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A pedophile.

<blockquote>''I am not a '''pedofork''', you DORKS!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC%27s_Second_Message</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Created as a half-assed attempt to make "pedophile" rhyme with dork. Coined in Chris's [[Madman Rising]] video, in response to the trolls who were comparing him to [[wikipedia:Herbert_(Family_Guy)| Herbert the Pervert]] from ''Family Guy''.</blockquote>

;[[Pickle|pickle]]
[[File:Pickle Rick.jpg|right|thumb|Chris bought this back in 2018. The brine-soaked irony!]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A penis, particularly one of [[JERKS|any man that isn't Chris]].

<blockquote>''Do me a favor, draw a VAGINA on my Rosechu, Rosechu IS A GIRL; SHE NEVER HAD A FREAKIN' '''PICKLE'''!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Chrisreply3.PNG</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The word "pickle" is one of the few hundred slang words for the word "penis".<ref>https://web.stanford.edu/~eckert/PDF/PenisTesticlesSlang.pdf</ref> It is unknown why Chris prefers to refer to the penises of other men as "pickles", while he calls his own his "duck", but it may have to do with Chris's sexual insecurity and the fact that he legitimately hates actual pickles <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_4#Why_Chris_hates_pickles</ref>, whereas Chris thinks he's special enough to have a cutesy name for his own penis.</blockquote>

;Pfalm
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The act of placing your palm over someone's face or the camera, as if it's the viewer's face.

<blockquote>''Why don’t you tell that to [[Emgo]] before you judge yourself once again for that which you are (mis)judging me of. #BeGeekBeProud #PFALM.''<ref>[[January_2024_social_media_posts#Emgo_and_PFALM]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: According to Chris, it comes from the phrase "palm in your face", combining the words "palm" and "face".<ref>[[CWC_Blog_(Cwclight)#Random_Thoughts_(will_be_updated_from_time_to_time)]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;[[Pmurt]]

<blockquote>1. ''(proper noun)'' The 45th and 47th president of the United States: Donald Trump.

<blockquote>''EID '''PMURT''' EID!!!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Eid,_Pmurt,_Eid</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Donald Trump's last name, but spelled backwards. In Chris's first usage of this CWC-ism, Chris mentioned how "Trump spelled backward is "Pmurt", which sounds like "hurt".<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/September_2016_Facebook_posts#Registered_to_vote</ref>
Due to Chris's strong hatred for Trump, he frequently referred to Trump as Pmurt- believing that the spoken word of a backwards name has the power to degrade and weaken a person.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/U8C43P2A37A8_y_U8C1N023V0L</ref>. In Chris's eyes, if he repeated the word again and again, everyone would turn against Trump and start voting for [[Wikipedia:Hillary Clinton|Hillary]]. Unsurprisingly, Chris had no sway over the election aside from his own vote.
</blockquote>

;point at your snout and oink
<blockquote>1. ''(verb phrase)'' Do something humiliating to yourself.

<blockquote>''You both want me to even Beg, you can go '''point at your own damn snouts and Oink''' like Eric Cartman, and then [[Rape]] yourselves with your own Damn [[Star Wars|Darth Maul]] [[Sex toys|Dual LightSabre]].''<ref>[[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A reference to a scene in the ''[[South Park]]'' episode "{{w|Scott Tenorman Must Die}}", where Scott makes Eric Cartman embarass himself by singing a song about being a "little piggy". Chris said this to [[Clyde Cash]] and [[Surfshack Tito]] upon failing to receive a cash bounty for destroying his own [[PlayStation 3]].
</blockquote>

;poke
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Marijuana.

<blockquote>''Anyway, eclectic! High on the hedge and high on the hog. You want some of this '''poke''', mon?<ref>[[CWC address to Royal Board]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Intended as a demonstration of what "Soni-Chew the Eclectic Heeedge Hog Poke Mon of London, England" would sound like. A coded reference to Pokémon, and may or may not be a play on the verb "toke".
</blockquote>

;[[Polyamorous marriage|polyamorous]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Polygamous.

<blockquote>''I go'' [sic] ''married to Magi-Chan Sonichu and Cryzel Rosechu last March, and then I married Sylvana Rosechu and Mewtwo last June. We all share a '''polyamorous''' relationship.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Miss_Cherry_asks_Chris_about_his_marriages.png</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An etymologically malformed neologism from the 1970's for having multiple romantic or sexual relations at once, misapplied by Chris. </blockquote>

;prawns
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Subordinates or helpers, often those wittingly or unwittingly aiding a sinister character.

<blockquote>''You keep sending out your '''prawns''' to do your dirty work, you coward.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Chris%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica#15_May</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris almost certainly meant to type "pawns" here. </blockquote>

;[[Prickly-Wicklies|prickly-wicklies]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Punishments given for insulting or harming Chris.

<blockquote>''War gets you '''prickly-wicklies'''... as well as punches.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/A_Warm_Fuzzy_Tale</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Refer to ''Fuzzy-Wuzzies''.

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#F|fuzzy-wuzzies]]

</blockquote>

;[[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens]]
[[Image:PVCCitizens.jpg|thumb]]
<blockquote>1. ''(backronym)'' The headquarters of several Sonichu villains.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: The name itself is a backronym of the college Chris attended, [[PVCC|the Piedmont Virginia Community College]]. After experiencing several mishaps throughout his college experience<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College#Kicked_out_of_English</ref><ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College#Kicked_out_of_college</ref>, the dean giving him the cold hard truth about why his [[Love Quest]] is doomed to fail became the straw that broke the camel's back, and Chris thought it would be a smart idea to deface the college afterward in his comics.</blockquote>

;prowldent
<blockquote>1. ''(???)'' Unknown.

<blockquote>There's no quote to cite this from, just a logo in which Chris gives the name "Prowldent Virginia Community College" to [[PVCC]].<ref>[[:File:ProwldentVCC.jpg]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Likely combining connotations of "prowl" and "dent" (either to leave an indentation or [[fangs|teeth]]).
</blockquote>

;Pu Tuhs!
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Shut Up!

<blockquote>''SHE; my Ariel Starter was Female from the start, so '''Pu Tuhs!'''''<ref>[[December 2016 Facebook posts#Favorite Pokemon]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: "Shut up" backwards. Because it is backwards, Chris thinks it is more debasing than the normal version of the phrase.
</blockquote>

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Q ==
|-
|

;q-sand
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' Short for quarter sandwich (i.e. a quarter of a sandwich).

<blockquote>
''So, mom ignored her and ate the '''q-sand''' in front of her.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 31]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Appeared in an [[Jackie E-mails 31|e-mail]] sent to [[Jackie]] dated August 5, 2011. Most likely unnecessarily used as a [[Sonic the Hedgehog|way past cool]] abbreviation.
</blockquote>

;quarters
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An office space; headquarters.

<blockquote>''Then that B-Dog ripped up my notes and all, dragged me to her '''quarters''' and talked down to me very RUDELY AND HOARSELY.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris%27s_Wikipedia_profile</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Whenever Chris says that he's being brought to someone's office, he always refers to it as their "quarters", as if he was being brought to some kind of evil hideout. This could be to add unnecessary dramatic effect to his stories.

2. ''(noun, pl.)'' coins, no matter their origin or worth.

<blockquote>''Uhh. I want a soda, but it takes only C '''quarters''' and I only have W quarters. Do you have any change?''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_9_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The first time this word was used like this was in [[Sonichu 9]], where it is revealed that [[CWCville]] issues its currency in the form of "C-quarters" and "W-quarters". According to this issue, 10 C-quarters, make up a single W-quarter, which ultimately defeats the whole concept of the "quarter" coin. Despite being a part of the United States, CWC-ville still issues this strange form of currency, along with US dollars. Because of this, Chris likely decided to refer to his currency as "quarters" so that it could technically count as US currency.</blockquote>

;quite
<blockquote>1. ''(exclamation)'' A fancy replacement of the word "right" or "correct".

<blockquote>''Arthur: Magi-Chan, it's because of his-- you know, he wants to help all of his friends, and with his ability to contact them all simultaenously at the same time, it's an amazing ability to have.</blockquote>

<blockquote>''Chris: '''Quite''', he is the psychic type, after all.''<ref>[[CatKnight Interview]'']</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adverb)'' to the utmost or most absolute extent or degree; absolutely; completely.

<blockquote> ''Hm. Not enough to, uhh... Well, he knows quite-- he can see '''quite''' a bit far into the future, but although there are details of which you might not be able to see, a point or two.'' <ref>[[CatKnight Interview]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''For a hundred dollars? Th-that's, that's '''quite''', that's uh, it'd take more funds for me to, more funds than that for me to be able to acquire the material figures...''<ref>[[CatKnight Interview]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris infamously used this word, along with "indeed" ad nauseam in his interview with [[Arthur Spatchcock]], believing that doing so is essentially the same as speaking his language, British if you will.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== R ==
|-
|

;raincoat
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a condom.

<blockquote>''You ARE the woman...we gotta stop by [[Wal-Mart|Wall-Mall-Wart]] on the way for a "'''raincoat'''".''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_7_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The term "raincoat" is actually an archaic slang term for the word "condom".<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/raincoat</ref> Given that Chris has been raised by two geezers his whole life, and that part of his childhood has consisted of [[Gilligan's Island|old TV shows]], Chris thought that people would understand what he meant when he states that his Mary Sues are having protected sex with a raincoat.</blockquote>

;[[random-access humor]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' non-sequitur.

<blockquote>''Punchy grew up in a dojo, where he perfected his punches. He is also full of '''random-access humor'''. He lost his tail in a brutal fight.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP5.htm</ref></blockquote>

Origin: According to Chris, his brain is completely random, and it always spews out incoherent garbage. In his mind, this works in the same way a computer processes random-access memory.<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref>

</blockquote>

;rapier
[[File:ReldnahcTheRapier .jpg|thumb|Reldnahc the Rapier]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun, attributive)'' rapist, sexual assailant.

<blockquote>
''Now! My '''rapier''' friend, I would very much like you to get off me, please.''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/sonichu-12-pages-54-60.33547/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris-Chan Sonichu calls [[Reldnahc_Notsew_Naitsirhc#Fictional_biography|Reldnahc Ha-Taque]] his "rapier friend" in [[Sonichu 12|Sonichu #12]] after Reldnahc tackles him to the ground in a suggestive pose and touches his chest, thus (in Chris's hyperbolic mind) "raping" him. As a double double entendre, he could also be using the externally attested definition, as an adjective meaning "witty",<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/rapier#Adjective</ref> and metaphorically referring to a kind of thin, sharp-pointed sword. This is incredibly unlikely due to Chris's basic understanding of the English language, and he most likely didn't know "rapist" is the term for one who rapes, not raper or rapier.
</blockquote>

;reality cartoon

<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' The universe.

<blockquote>
''Life is a cartoon; we are all the characters of the larger; the cartoons we make are part of our own universe; we're all a '''reality cartoon'''.''<ref>August 2017 tweets#"Life is a cartoon"</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Since Chris's life revolves mainly around [[Vidya]] and cartoons, it would make sense to him that the most believable explanation for the universe and everything in it is that it's all a cartoon. Likely related to Chris's known belief that [[Chris_and_reality#Fictional_characters_and_media|all fiction actually exists in alternate universes]]. Chris' interactions with the [[Idea Guys]] made this idea seem even more plausible to him.
</blockquote>

;[[recycling]]

<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' the act of one ingesting their own semen to preserve their sperm count.

<blockquote> I '''recycle''' my own semen, because, uh, you know, yes I do masturbate.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Captain%27s_Log,_Stardate_April_28th,_2009</ref> </blockquote>

Origin: Chris, having very little knowledge of how the male reproductive system works, thinks that men can run out of sperm from masturbating or orgasming too much. Fearing the loss of "potential children", Chris actually thinks that by ingesting the sperm back into his body, his sperm count will stay in balance, thus, he is "recycling" it.

</blockquote>

;reeb
[[Image:4centgarbagereeb.jpg|thumb|Glug! Glug! Glug!]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' beer or any other alcoholic beverage of the like.

<blockquote>''Then he glugs his '''reeb''', heh-heh, and then he conks out.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_8_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, thinking he's so [[Slow-in-the-minds|clever]], decided to censor any mention of the word "beer" in his comics, by spelling the word backward.</blockquote>

;Resident-Evil refrigerator

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The refrigerator in the previous Chandler Household.

<blockquote>''Kitchen very much blocked off all over... with the '''Resident Evil refrigerator''' right there.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Tour_of_Chris%27s_House_II</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris refers to the fridge as the "Resident Evil" kind, because in Japan, the game ''Resident Evil'' is known as ''Biohazard''.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Tour_of_Chris%27s_House_II</ref><ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Resident_Evil</ref> Considering the quality of the household, that name may very well fit the description of the fridge in the state it was in before filming the [[Tour of Chris's House II|Second House Tour]].</blockquote>

;romps in the hay

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' sexual intercourse

<blockquote>''This page, by the way, was drawn before last March, so stuff Has Happened since then, it is all good. Go ahead and Muck It Up in your heads, Trolls; I Am BiSexual, and I Laugh at your Jokes. (Awesome Romps in the hay with him, as well as Cryzel)''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/July_2018_social_media_posts#BronyCon_thoughts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris has used this term since at least 2018.
</blockquote>

;[[Rosechu (species)|Rosechu]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The female counterpart of the [[Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon]].</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: Derived from the appropriately named first Rosechu of CWCville, [[Rosechu]]. The name of the species is a portmanteau of the last name of the ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog]]'' character, Amy Rose, and "Raichu", the evolved form of a Pikachu.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== S ==
|-
|

;[[saga]]
<blockquote>1 ''(noun)'' An ongoing event within Chris' life.

<blockquote>''A Sonichu Special: CWC's Love Quest '''Saga'''''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris was actually the first to use the term "saga" as Christorians know it today, using it as such when describing his Love Quest on the cover of [[Sonichu 4]]. It wasn't until the Miyamota Saga when the term was used by Christorians to describe ongoing events in Chris' life as we know it.</blockquote>

;salty
<blockquote>1 ''(adjective)'' showing more maturity or coarseness than is expected, especially knowledge of [[honest]] topics like [[Chris and sex|sex]].

<blockquote>''Ah, but I am not the weak person they think I am; I am much, much '''saltier'''!''<ref>[[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu'' #4]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Based upon a line from "Bowling Girls", ninth episode of ''[[Excel Saga]]'': "But I'm not the sweet little girl I was a few minutes ago! I'm much, much saltier now!" "Salty" in this context derives from naval lingo, since the most experienced sailors would have greater exposure to both the saltwater seas and worldly experiences.
</blockquote>

;[[Scale of Respect|scale of respect]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's way of measuring his respect for other people.

<blockquote>''I'll consider knocking you and Susan up my '''Scale of Respect''' each by 2 points''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Scale_of_Respect</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, like most other autistics, tends to view the world based on numerical values due to their lack of understanding of certain abstract concepts such as respect. Because of this, Chris made his very own numerical scale to decide on who should be respected, compared to who shouldn't.</blockquote>

;seinor
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Misspelling of senior.

<blockquote>''A cool Junior or '''Seinor'''-Year student, and follow their example on asking others out''<ref>[[CWC Blog]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An example of how the “i before e rule” escapes Chris.

</blockquote>

;self-epic
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' describing a situation which is epic, and at the same time related to Chris and his various clones.

<blockquote>''And I will square-off in the TRULY '''SELF-EPIC''' Battle between me, and my Dark Half.''<ref>[[An Important Update]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: [[Chris and his Ego|Self-explanatory]].</blockquote>
</blockquote>

;self-masturbation
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[Mass debating|masturbation]].

<blockquote>'''''Self-masturbation''' is really arduous and annoying.''<ref name=15min>[[Masturbation discussions]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris decided to add the prefix "self-" to make it clear that he was stroking his own [[duck]], apparently unaware that use of said prefix is redundant (the term masturbation typically implies self-pleasure unless one specifies otherwise).</blockquote>
</blockquote>

;self-sexually active
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' in the habit of [[Mass debating|masturbating]].

<blockquote>''And Another Thing, yes, I will admit I was '''self-sexually active'''; WAS. You all turned me off of Sex LONG Before I even thought of coming out as Trans in ‘14.''<ref>[[February 2020 social media posts#On seeing his father's penis]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A modification of "sexually active".</blockquote>
</blockquote>

;ship
[[File:Chillaxingcard.jpg|200px|thumb|An example of a "shipping".]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An act of two or more OCs interacting with or performing any given action towards one another, regardless of any romantic feelings.

<blockquote>''You must take a Pony card from the grid and reattach it elsewhere with this '''Ship'''. That card's power activates. At the end of the turn, until the Pony card attached with this '''Ship''' is discarded of removed from the grid, it gains the Keyword Villain.''<ref>[https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:EpicOnlineBully.jpeg]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An abbreviation of the word "relationship". Chris learned the term from the card game ''[[Twilight Sparkle's Secret Shipfic Folder]]'', a My Little Pony fan game satirizing the popular internet trend of shipping. He used the game as another creative medium to sell items to fans, trolls, weens, and enablers.</blockquote>
</blockquote>

;shitful
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' hurtful; defamitory.

<blockquote>''And this is the last time I will ever say anything in response to your '''shitful''' and hurtful comments and hatred for Hate's Sake!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2014_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Shitful is a vulgar slang word, synonymous with words like "boat-load" or "truck-load". Chris may have seen the "shit" part of this word and assumed that it was a more profane version of "hateful". Disregarding its actual meaning, the word to Chris is used for situations that seem "shitty" to him.</blockquote>

;[[SLGBTQ]]

<blockquote>1. ''(acronym)'' an extended acronym for LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender) which includes "straights" and "questioning people".

<blockquote>''Considering your logo there, Texas will be feeling more love from the '''SLGBTQ''' community; give us props and Love, Lone Star State.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/September_2017_tweets#Hurricane_Harvey_and_SLGBT</ref></blockquote>

Origin: When Chris first used this acronym, he didn't explain what groups the "S" or "Q" were supposed to represent, making plenty of people confused. Eventually, Chris revealed that the "S" represents '''s'''traight and cis-gender people, while "Q" represents "'''q'''ueers" or "'''q'''uestioning people". Chris believes that if he included straight people into LGBT, then those particular people would feel more invited to join into the community. Considering the fact that gay people are minorities, adding the "S" to LGBT only defeats the entire purpose of identifying people as LGBT in the first place.</blockquote>

;[[Slow-in-the-minds|slow-in-the-mind]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a mentally handicapped person

<blockquote>''And finally, after a hard "odd" day, he rides home on a bus, but unfortunately, it had a few "'''slow-in-the-minds'''" on it.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/A_Week_With_Christian_Chandler></ref></blockquote>

Origin: While the exact origin of the term is unknown, slow-in-the-minds was first used by Chris in a high school assignment.<ref>[[Manchester High Leaks#Help This Unborn Child]]</ref> "Slow-in-the-minds" works as a stand in for the less-socially-acceptable "retard", so it's possible that Chris created this CWC-ism in order to self-censor.

</blockquote>

;slow-minded

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' mentally retarded

<blockquote>''As for what had happened during PVCC, in a nutshell; about Mid-Summer, 2003, I've realize upon revolation that I needed a girl friend to make into a Sweetheart from the Ground-Up, so with a sign (which I've later realized that it made me look '''slow-minded'''; the "R" Word), I've started my Enduring Love Quest.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_emails_2007#February</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''OK, I can definitely name you a few reasons, like there was this one [stutters] …there was this one '''slow-minded''' individual named Tony. He was like as big as-he was as big and strong as an ox. He just kept on making all the moanings and noises and whatnot, and he sometimes even-even-a couple of times he even spat on me, and he even bopped me on the back of the head once or twice during the whole-during the whole time I knew him there.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Kacey_Call_9</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' stupid, but not quite retarded

<blockquote> ''I'll admit I have had some '''slow-minded''' moments. But I am certainly not totally retarded.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call#Crossing_the_Na.C3.AFve_Line_.281:46:21-1:52:36.29</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;SNERGEN FLERGEN!!!
[[Image:SNERGEN FLERGEN!.PNG|thumb|200px]]
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' A phrase one may shout out when asked for attendance.

<blockquote>'''''SNERGEN FLERGEN!!!'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic9P6.jpg</ref>
''-What?''

''Uh...here!''
</blockquote>

Origin: An obvious example of Chris's [[CWC-isms#R|random-access humor]]. This weird phrase appeared in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], when the cast was asked for their attendance during a [[CWC-isms#D|Dating Education]] class. When [[Wild Sonichu]] was asked for his attendance, he blurted out this phrase as Chris's many attempts to be funny in his comics. Given Chris's childish sense of humor, it would make a whole lot of sense for him to include a character randomly blurt out a nonsensical phrase out of nowhere.</blockquote>

;snooze cruise
<blockquote>1. a long period of slumber

<blockquote> ''Next, he had Trigonometry...I'd hate to be Christian when his nerves kicked into action after waking up from a "notey" '''snooze cruise''', but I was.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/A_Week_With_Christian_Chandler</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from ''[[Wikipedia:Sonic Adventure|Sonic Adventure]]''.

</blockquote>

;somecummpentydifferent
<blockquote>1. ''(Phrase)'' Used to announce a change in subject.

<blockquote>''Anyway and now for somecummpentydifferent stay tuned for '''somecummpentydifferent''' — a bunch of good pushups!''<ref>[[Getting Foam Ed]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(Phrase)'' Used to announce use of [[random-access humor]].

<blockquote>''And now for '''somecummpentydifferent'''. BUUUUNG! And now it's Monty Python's flying elephants. Du tu du tu du tu du. Du tu du tu du tu du. Johan, why is people running away? I don't know, Greeg, why is people running away.''<ref>[[CWCFlyingElephants]]. Note this is the very first thing he says, so there's nothing to be completely different ''from''.</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris is trying to say "And now for something completely different" like John Cleese does on [[Monty Python]]. Suffice to say Cleese's ability to say three multisyllabic words in rapid succession exceeds that of Chris.</blockquote>

;[[Tobacky|somkey]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' The quality of having smoked recreationally, be it tobacco, marijuana, or some other substance.

<blockquote>''Thank our mayor, Mr. Christian Weston Chandler that CWCville is a clean city; nobody has to go home drunk or '''somkey'''!''<ref>[[Sonichu 8]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A simple corruption of the word 'Smokey', used by [[Jamsta Sonichu]] and [[Lolisa Rosechu]] during their report on [[Sonichu 8#Spring Break, 2008!|Spring Break, 2008!]].
</blockquote>

;[[Sonichu (species)|Sonichu]]
<blockquote>1. (noun) The male counterpart of the Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: Derived from the appropriately named first Sonichu of CWCville, Sonichu. The name of the species is a portmanteau of the name of the titular character of ''Sonic the Hedgehog'', Sonic, and "Pikachu".</blockquote>

;soo
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' Very, Very much.

<blockquote>''Dear Blanca, I am '''soo''' happy that you were revealed as my True, Honest Sweetheart-To-Be''<ref>[[Chris's Letter to Blanca]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In writing, Chris often adds extra o's to the word "so" to prolong the "o" sound and show added emphasis. This has the (unintentional?) effect of mimicking the speech patterns of a Valley Girl or an effeminate homosexual. However, where most people would add two or more o's, (e.g., "I love you sooo much!"), Chris frequently only adds one, resulting in "soo," which makes the word look like it's supposed to be pronounced "sue".

This may originate from pamphlets published by [http://www.channing-bete.com/ Channing Bete], [[Autism|short and uninformative]] self-help pamphlets often handed out at churches, the last page of which often feature a summary headlined by "Soo…" Given his distrust of help from anyone other than [[Rocky]], it is not entirely impossible that Chris has read Channing Bete pamphlets occasionally.

This is one of many recurring jokes in the [[Sonichu Audiobooks]] in which the narrator pronounces words like "soo" as they are literally spelled, instead of how Chris intended them to be read.
</blockquote>

;soul-bonding
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Sexual intercourse as a means of purifying someone.

<blockquote>What had happened was Literally a Divine Mission, commissioned to Christine and I by Emanuel (GOD above Gods), herself, to Heal and Cleanse Barbara's health and soul and being and Clear her of remaining sins and regrets through Coddling, Talking, and Supportive '''Soul Bonding''' to mainly Extend her Life, personally by Divine Intervention.<ref>[[Jail Letter - 4 October 2021]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris has somehow come under the delusion that having sex with his mother would "purify" her, and extend her lifetime, all through the act of bonding each other's souls.

</blockquote>

;soup beds
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Homeless shelter with beds

<blockquote>'' I mean, we have soup kitchens and we have '''soup beds'''. We should really combine the two into SOUP HOTELS!''<ref>[[A Public Announcement for Congress]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris tries to distill his "soup hotel" idea into its two components, but he mangles one of them by retaining the "soup" prefix.
</blockquote>

;sourdough region
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The crotch area

<blockquote>''Its weak point is still the '''sourdough region''', but it would take FIVE KICKS to get to it''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_4_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In his Sonichu comics, Chris has decided to make the main weakness of the jerkops their crotch. The weakest of the jerkops take only one kick to be taken down, while higher-ranking jerkops, such as [[Jerkhief]] take five. The reason why Chris refers to this spot as the "sourdough region" is unknown, but most of his other CWC-isms already tend to sound so nonsensical to begin with, it barely even matters.</blockquote>

;spike on one's shoulder
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' refers to the act of holding grievances towards someone.

<blockquote>''There was a whole bunch of misunderstandings between me and my employer, and he had a '''spike on his shoulder''' against me.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A confusion with the phrase "chip on one's shoulder".</blockquote>

;spot
<blockquote> 1. ''(noun)'' A small amount.

<blockquote>''the recent 43.98 purchase was actually a ''spot'' of Wheeling and Dealing I did; I actually spent less to make a profit.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jackie_E-mails_15</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris likes to retardedly incorporate British English into his sentences when he has the chance, possibly to sound more classy than he actually is. The phrase "A spot of X" is a British English idiom referring to a small amount of something.</blockquote>

;sticky dream
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A wet dream

<blockquote>''After falling back asleep Chris had a "'''sticky dream'''."''<ref>[[Ivy Q&A]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris claims that a "wet dream" actually refers to wetting one's bed as opposed to nocturnal emission.
</blockquote>

;straight path
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The quality of being heterosexual and cisgender

<blockquote>''And, besides, if you stray away from the '''straight path''', it can really jeopardize the entire future of the world and the human race.<ref>[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]]''</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Before the [[Tomgirl Saga]], Chris had an intense fear of "falling off the straight path". When he states this, he is essentially referring to being on the path to straightness, in the same way a normal person would refer to someone being on the path to success. Chris also had this unrealistic idea that being in contact with gay men would suddenly make him gay too, which would therefore make him fall off the path. Possibly also an allusion to the phrase "straight and narrow" and/or the Biblical passage Matthew 7:14: "Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it."</blockquote>

</blockquote>
;[[Sub-Episodes|sub-episode]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The side stories in the [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]] comics.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: A result of Chris' use of [[Chris and English#Television jargon|television jargon]] in his comics.</blockquote>

;sumbah
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Minced oath for "son of a bitch."

<blockquote>''Yo, Christian, thanks for saving my sister from that crazy '''sumbah'''''<ref>[[Sonichu Special 4]], page K-4</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Probably based upon "sumbitch."
</blockquote>

;[[Sweetbolt|sweetbolt]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A pet name used by [[CWC-isms#E|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]].

<blockquote>''Ahh..that salad was great! What's wrong '''sweetbolt'''?''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP11.htm</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' A sweetheart.

<blockquote>''I understand, and I will NEVER put it against you. Yes, as your '''SweetBolt'''. :)?''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP11.htm</ref></blockquote>

Origin: When Chris first worked on his Sonichu comics, he tried to incorporate as many references to electricity as he can, in order to match with the Pikachu part of the titular character. A portmanteau of the CWC-ism "sweetheart" and "bolt".
</blockquote>

;[[Sweetheart|sweetheart]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A potential lover.

<blockquote>''Oh, gee, I'm sorry Bionic, but back then I was na- I was naive on dating and all that, so I just didn't think of it at the time. But if you a '''sweetheart''', Meg has created quite a few foxy characters. If she's cool with it, you could go out with one of them.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_6_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Another cutesy pet name given to candidates of his Love Quest.</blockquote>

;[[Sweetheart from the Ground-Up|sweetheart from the ground-up]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An ideal sweetheart beyond the friend zone.

<blockquote>''For days to weeks to months to years, I Felt So Lonesome and Incomplete. But I didn't STOP! In the name of Love, and the fact that there had to be a Boyfriend-Free Girl out there, somewhere, for me to get to know, grow a strong companionship with and make into a '''Sweetheart from the Ground-Up''', so in later years, after the inevitability of my parents leaving me, I WON'T BE ALONE. And I can eventually realize my dream of being a good husband, and father of a pretty girl named Crystal.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days</ref></blockquote>

Origin: As stated, Chris intended to use this weird phrase to indicate that he wants an ideal gal-pal well beyond the friend zone. Chris thought this phrase sounded so clever, that he used it constantly.</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== T ==
|-
|

;teenages

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The 13-19 age group; teenage years.

<blockquote>''Ahem... hello, ladies and gentlemen, girls and boys, and dudes of all '''teenages''', as well as the, uh, gals.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In Chris's [[Future Message]], he attempts to talk down to just about every age group. In order to do this, he starts his video off with the quote above. Chris clearly couldn't think of a way to refer to teenagers, so he decided to refer to such people by "teenages". A butchering of "people of all ages".</blockquote>

;teir
[[File:Teir.png|thumb|200|Chris spelling tier wrong.]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Misspelling of tier.

<blockquote>''$1 '''Teir'''''<ref>[[Patreon]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Yet another example of how Chris is unaware of “i before e”. In a June 2019 update, he managed to spell tier wrong throughout multiple descriptions, despite the correctly-spelled word being visible right on the page.</blockquote>

;telekinesis

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Telepathy, i.e. communication through long distances, usually via psychic or supernatural means.

<blockquote>''I’ve been communicating with her through '''telekinesis''', and she sounded very lonesome.''<ref>[[Silvana]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Whereas tele'''kine'''sis means ''moving'' objects from a distance with psychic powers (c.f. ''[[wikipedia:kinetic energy|kinetic]]''), Chris has never used the term properly. [[Magi-Chan|Psychic]] [[Silvana|characters]] in the [[comic]] have both powers of telekinesis and telepathy, but Chris has only used the former to refer to both.
</blockquote>

;Temple

<blockquote>1. [[14 Branchland Court|Chris's house]].
<blockquote>''Food for Barbara is also appreciated, and Visitors who personally offer genuine Kindness and Good Intentions are all encouraged to visit the '''Temple'''.''<ref>[[Jail Letter - 4 October 2021]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In [[2019]] Chris designated his house as the "Temple of CWC Sonichu" due to his growing [[Messiah complex]].
</blockquote>

;That was a straw that sold the blade to the executioner

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' That was the final straw.

<blockquote>''And on top of that, literally doxing someone on [[Kiwi Farms|Kiwi]], because someone has a hold over [[Bismuth|Naught]] to the point of him having to feel very insecure about himself. And the topper, in my eyes, one of y'all sent threats to [[Praetor|Anni]]. Fortunately, she completely missed and overlooked that memo in her inbox. '''That was a straw that sold the blade to the executioner'''.''<ref>[[MKR DMs]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used the phrase in listing his grievances against some members of the [[Watchmen]].
</blockquote>

;theoretical ex

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' One of the trolls who posed as a potential love interest for Chris during the classic period of trolling, between 2008 and 2011; a catfish, generally-speaking.

<blockquote>''Yeah, it’s like, you know, even when I try to make a new relationship, uh, especially among the '''theoretical rex-, exes''' I had, I still could not tell which was which…''<ref>[[Catie Date Conversation Transcript#Chris's history with the trolls]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris started calling the trolls who pretended to be his girlfriends during the classic era "theoretical exes" around the time of his date with [[Catherine|Catie]]. When pressed by Cousin Al as to what he meant, he cited that people may not always be who they say they are on the Internet.
</blockquote>

;This Viral Event

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The worldwide Coronavirus ([[COVID-19]], SARS-CoV-2) outbreak in early [[2020]], which began in [[China]] on New Year's Eve [[2019]] and has since become the most severe pandemic since the Spanish flu of 1918. Regarded by Chris as a trivial excuse to cancel a perfectly good ''[[My Little Pony]]'' convention.

<blockquote>''The Bottom Line is that '''This Viral Event''' is actually a better step in our own developments and evolution, as well as a deity-level test to sort out the weak from the moderate and strong of mental and soulful intervals, and nothing else.<ref>[[March 2020 social media posts#Chris finally weighs in on the coronavirus pandemic]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's [[Chris and religion|theodicy]] assigns any misfortune in the world to the Dimensional Merge. As the disease's spread has caused many governments to forbid large gatherings as a sanitary measure, it has become a [[Chris and His Ego|personal inconvenience to Chris]]. He believes that the pandemic will soon be stopped by [[OC|fictional characters]]' efforts,<ref>[March 2020 social media posts#COVID-19 a sign of dimensional merge]</ref> making it nothing but a transient event.</blockquote>

;[[Tobacky|tobacky]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' tobacco or tobacco products

<blockquote>''If I could, I would take every last ounce of '''tobacky''', put 'em on a rocket, and shoot 'em up to the Moon.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: American English slang, used by Chandlers since 1856,<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/tobacky#English</ref> and for [[random access humor]] since 1928.<ref>[http://www.uwosh.edu/home_pages/faculty_staff/earns/song.html Back in Nagasaki Where the Fellers Chew Tobaccy]</ref> Chris hates the act of smoking cigarettes so much that even uttering the word "tobacco" makes him feel uncomfortable, so Chris uses this as a retarded [[wikipedia:minced oath|minced oath]].<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica</ref></blockquote>

;tom-tom
[[File:Duck Pounding Some Tom-Tom.jpeg|thumb|A duck pounding some tom-tom real hard]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' female genitalia.

<blockquote>''MY DUCK HUNGERS FOR '''TOM-TOM''' TO POUND!!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/I_Am_The_TRUE,_Original_CCWC</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from the short Adult Swim music video, ''Pound my Tom-Tom'', which served as the intro to the cartoon, ''Lucy, the Daughter of the Devil''.<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r1DVoH0Njow</ref> Considering Chris barely understands anything adult, the fact that this was meant to be a bad euphemism, which the character, Lucy, used to avoid directly mentioning her vagina, flew over his head.</blockquote>

;[[Tomgirl Pictures|tomgirl]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A femboy, which is a person who identifies as male though still cross dresses.

<blockquote>''I am '''Tomgirl'''.''<ref>[[:File:I_am_tomgirl.jpg|PSN comment as of 6 April 2011]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: analogous to "tomboy", i.e. a girl who likes boy-stuff.

</blockquote>

;too many crooks

<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expression of dissatisfaction with an overabundance of evildoers.

<blockquote>''Well, call it--this was "too many crooks." '''Too many crooks!''' Too many crooks! And that ED page is one of those crooks.''<ref>[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Based upon the idiom, "too many cooks spoil the broth," although that idiom means something, whereas this is just an incomplete sentence.
</blockquote>

;took my idea for a fall

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Refers to ruining Chris's [[Love Quest]] plans.

<blockquote>''I am very mad and upset, because that JERK took my idea for a fall, just like that XXXXX at PVCC did!''<ref>[[CWC%27s Diary#2004]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this in his poem [[Saddest Heart in the World]] as well as a 2004 diary entry. Appears to be a mangling of "took me for a fool."</blockquote>

;triage

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' ménage à trois; a romantic relationship between three people.

<blockquote>''Magi-Chan Sonichu, Silvana Rosechu & Mewtwo / A Loving '''Triage'''''<ref>[[January 2018 Facebook posts‎‎#Mewtwo and Magi-Chan married]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A corruption or misspelling of "triad", possibly influenced by the ending of "ménage". "[[wikipedia:Triage|Triage]]" is a real word with a completely different meaning and unrelated etymology.
</blockquote>

;trollin' stupid

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Very stupid, in a manner pertaining to trolling.

<blockquote>''Because that's what you deserve, you God damn womanizing raping... '''trollin' stupid''' pickle suited... nigger!''<ref>[[Chris Drops the N-Bomb]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to have coined this phrase for his [[CWC "Boyfriend"|"Boyfriend"]] lyrics with "trollin'" serving as an intensifier along the lines of "fucking."
</blockquote>

;true and honest

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' something [[Honest content|honest]].

<blockquote>''I like sharing my honest feelings with other people because they're good feelings, most of the time. And more importantly they are '''true and honest''' feelings. SO THERE.''<ref>[[For Chris]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris first used the adjective with reference to his love for [[PandaHalo]], and the adjective was often used by [[Liquid Chris]].
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== U ==
|-
|

;ugly growth

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used by Chris to refer to his own penis negatively.

<blockquote>''"Did I not just tell you I am Seven Inches Long?! It is soo long, that I am literally able to stretch it Under my taint, and tuck it between my own ass cheeks, beyond my ass hole. With help, I can literally even shove the head of the '''Ugly Growth''' Up Mine!"''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Colin_Chat_2</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Un-clit|un-clit]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A piercing Chris got on his perrinium as an immitation clitoris.

<blockquote>''It is a short, steel straight piece with steel spheres, of which I refer to them as my '''un-clit'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Un-clit</ref></blockquote>

Origin: During his Tomgirl years, Chris was, and still is, very desperate to gain female body traits such as bigger breasts, wider hips, a fully functioning vagina, etc. In order to get a part of the work done, Chris got a piercing on his taint as a sort of pseudo-clitoris, showing more of Chris's limited knowledge of female anatomy. </blockquote>

;uncouth
[[File:Uncouth Twat.png|thumb|Most uncouth!]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' unlikeable, lacking good manners.

<blockquote>''And, by the way, among which, You give the Males a Most Terrible and Horrible Name in your behavior. Most '''Uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Colin_Chat_1</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''Trump is most Immature, '''Uncouth''', and Not Valid to be president.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Misc_E-mails#Anti-Pmurt</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I felt it appropriate to change my profile photo back to the filtered one for what happened in France the while back with due respect of the continuing of Trump's most drastic and '''uncouth''' actions in office.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/January_2017_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''You, sir, are '''Uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/2017_tweets#Trump.2C_you_mocked_the_mentally-challenged</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''All of you are nothing but immature, borish, '''uncouth''', and damned Neanderthals.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonic_Boom_Protests#Chris_Rages_On</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''Not Sexual Fantasy; Friendships, You '''Uncouth''' Cad. Hmpf!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2017_tweets#Unleashing_his_inner_Brit</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And as it Had been My fault on that #NationalGirlfriendTweet that started the whole mess, that was Why I chose whole-heartedly to Harass Me instead of Doopie or Anyone Else who was being harassed with the mis-content from Years Ago from me taken Out Of Context, Mind you, because Harassing Anyone at Anyone else’s Expense is Just Plain Wrong, Bullying, and '''Uncouth'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2017_tweets</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote> ''And it was ignored by you that Talulah Bankhead coined the term for Tabitha, you '''Uncouth''' Twat.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2017_tweets#Tabitha_addresses_CWC_flame_war</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I agree it is shameful of these people to have accounts just to haze at me and all others, Soo '''uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/NightStar2891_tweets#Twitter_spam_for_Tabitha</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I miss Jessica. You Trolls Scared Her Off by either Hacking or Reporting her Facebook. You '''Uncouth''' Cads!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jessica_Quinn</ref></blockquote>

Origin: As demonstrated, Chris uses this word way more than any 21st-century [[American]] would. It is often speculated that Chris picked up this word from an ''MLP'' episode, where Applebloom and Applejack are talking about what the word "uncouth" means.<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S-SrQ-Oz1k4</ref> Seeing how this conversation alone is somehow a staple in the Brony subculture, and how Chris is one of those Bronies who sees more [[Night_Star#Chris_spills_the_beans|meaning]] in the show than it actually possesses, Chris likely picked up this term due to how foreign and smart it sounded to him.

Chris is also notorious for his use of British English whenever he tries to make it seem he knows what he's talking about. So it is also fairly likely Chris may have adapted this word solely because he thinks British English words will make him sound smarter.
</blockquote>

;[[UNGA-WUNGA]]
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' A sexual chant from the [[Cherokian Clan]].
<blockquote>''There is no quote to directly cite the use of this CWC-ism. This CWC-ism was used in one of Chris' art pieces appropriately named "UNGA-WUNGA"''</blockquote>
Origin: Comes from a horrifying art piece Chris drew of himself banging [[Jackie]] against a tree while a group of Cherokians masturbate to their orgy.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Unga_Wunga_Time.jpg</ref> As for the questionably racist phrase itself, Chris simply stated that it was "just a random phrase I randomly picked for the natives to chant as they jerked off."<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jackie_E-mails_11</ref></blockquote>

;unto
<blockquote>1. ''(preposition)'' Archaic or poetic form of the word "to".

<blockquote>''Now that it has been made fully clear to me, I am now able to devote myself fully '''unto''' you, Julie.''<ref>[[BlueSpike Skype Logs 7]]</ref></blockquote>
<blockquote>''I am very devastated, due to my SHATTERED HEART that [[Mary Lee Walsh|XXXXX]] caused '''unto''' me!''</blockquote>

Origin: Another one of Chris's autistic ways of sounding smart, possibly in imitation of the Bible. (c.f. ''[[Chris and hypocrisy|Do unto others...]]''). Chris uses this form more frequently than most English speakers of the 21st century should, even when it sounds unwieldy.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== V ==
|-
|
;vaginatables

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' female genitalia

<blockquote>''There is no quote to cite the use of this CWC-ism. Chris used this CWC-ism in an e-mail address "ILuvVaginatables@aol.com".''</blockquote>

Origin: A strange hybrid of the words "vagina" and "vegetables", purely for Random-Access Humor.</blockquote>

;vege-marmite

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Vegemite

<blockquote>''Certainly not a '''vege-marmite''' sanwich. Lol''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-372</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A retarded pun made by Chris to state his distaste for veggie marmite. Coincidentally, vegemite is essentially marmite, yeast extract from brewing beer turned into a pungent, salty paste, with vegetables and spices added in.<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vegemite</ref></blockquote>

;vestite

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A transvestite person.

<blockquote>''"That is the difference between Trans Gender and '''Vestites'''; ID as the other sex, and dressing like it, respectively"''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-335#post-2635076]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In the above post, Chris intended to write the words "transgender" and "transvestite" in the same sentence without duplicating the trans suffix. He did so by adding a space between the prefix and the respective endings. It is worth mentioning that "Vestite" is a word in Latin, and simply refers to being clothed, without any connotations regarding cross-dressing.</blockquote>

;[[Virgin with Rage|virgin with rage]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An individual who is sexually frustrated

<blockquote>''Tell me why
I'm stuck as a '''virgin with rage'''!
Tell me why
I so need a cute girl my age!
Tell me why
I never wanna hear you say,
"I have a boyfriend!"''<ref>[[So Need a Cute Girl]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The idea of being a virgin and not having a sweetheart was something that greatly upsetted Chris. He would throw tantrums after losing a potential sweetheart, and thus missing out on an opportunity to lose his virginity.</blockquote>

;[[Virginia is for virgins]]

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase that pushes the idea that the citizens of Virginia won't allow Chris to get a girlfriend solely due to his autism.

<blockquote>"'''VIRGINIA IS FOR VIRGINS''', NOT LOVERS!"<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days
</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An intentional butchering of the phrase "Virginia is for Lovers". His belief that the state of Virginia is behind some kind of conspiracy to prevent him from finding true love has started since attending [[PVCC]]. While there, Chris has gotten himself putting up Attraction Signs, loitering with said signs on campus, and even creating a [[Sonichu's News Dash|newsletter series]] in order to attract potential sweethearts. Seeing how all of this violated the school's rules and policies, he was sent directly to the [[Mary Lee Walsh|Dean]] in order for her to straighten him out.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Virginia_is_for_Virgins#Origins</ref> Of course, Chris took this to be another instance of him being discriminated, solely for being autistic. This, coupled with the fact that he's already failed on several occasions to actually get to date any of his his female friends in high school, reinforced this belief. </blockquote>

;VOTES FOR WOMEN!
[[Image:Ss03.jpg|thumb|Mrs. Banks, wearing the "Votes for Women" sash that Chris so blatantly misinterpreted.]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase shouted in protest of pictures depicting women with penises.

<blockquote>'''''VOTES FOR WOMEN''', STEP IN TIME! VOTES FOR WOMEN, STEP IN TIME! NEVER NEED A REASON, NEVER NEED A RHYME, VOTES FOR WOMEN, STEP IN TIME!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic8P52.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from a sash Mrs. Banks, a character from [[Mary Poppins]], had worn. Chris clearly took this banner to simply refer to any kind of mistreatment towards women, rather than the fairly obvious implication that she's actually fighting for the right to vote.</blockquote>

<blockquote>''See Also'': [[CWC-isms#W|Women's Rights]]
</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== W ==
|-
|

;Walter Grisby
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A man's name often employed in acts of random-access humor.

<blockquote>''"Is this '''Walter Grisby'''? Who threw a frisbee? Well you know what? DAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!"''<ref>[[Random-access humor]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' The retconned name of the character formerly known as [[Wes Iseli]].

Origin: Unknown; thought by some to be a reference to the Cartoon Network show ''Ed, Edd n Eddy''. A character in the PC game ''The Sims 3'' goes by the name of Walter Grisby, but the game's release post-dates Chris's first uses of the term by some years.
</blockquote>

; Warroir of Love
[[Image:WarriorOfLove.jpg|thumb|300px|History's greatest warroirs.]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' an advocate for spreading love and peace.

<blockquote>''"People! You do not understand! By Not blocking the Trolls, you are Promoting Hatred; They don't always side with Love. I Am '''Warroir of Love'''."''<ref>[[https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/902236285389111297]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Misspelling of the word "warrior". Chris considers himself a "warrior of love" because he believes that he is the [[Chris and kindness|voice of kindness]]. Most likely derived from the derogatory term "Social Justice Warrior", a term used for individuals who advocate for social justice and equality.
</blockquote>

; water on the rocks
[[File:Water and Dasani.jpeg|thumb|200px|Literally a drink on the rocks.]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' water poured over Chris's [[magic stones]] for drinking.

<blockquote>''#DrinkWater; Filtered or Bottled, preferred; Quartz, Rose Quartz, or Amethyst optional to enjoy it '''on the rocks''' (held in place with aluminum wire).''<ref>[[March 2020 social media posts#watch anime to kill coronavirus]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''staying hydrated with more than 101.4 ounces of filtered '''water on the rocks''' within a #Glacce bottle''<ref>[[January 2021 social media posts#GFuel and meditation]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In accordance with his [[Magical thinking|New Age]] beliefs, Chris purchased a Glacce water bottle for $80+, which features a crystal display set inside. He later placed one of his [[magic stones]] into it, crudely held in by aluminum wire, and refers to drinking from the bottle as "water on the rocks."
</blockquote>

;well-breasted
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Having large breasts.

<blockquote>''And her image dawned upon me in my imagination, starting out as the '''well-breasted''' pink electric-hedgehog (Pok'emon) with the long Raichu-like tail, I drew her outfit onto her in red and Battery-Charged Blue.''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Rosechu|CWCipedia article on Rosechu}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Confusion between "well-endowed" and "large-breasted".

</blockquote>

;witching hours
<blockquote> 1. ''(noun)'' The time between midnight and 4 AM that Chris cannot fall asleep during.

<blockquote>'' I know that I'm gonna be more effective with the '''witching hours''' during the night once again, whether I'm asleep or not, okay.<ref>[[Animated Everfree Message]]</ref>
</blockquote>
Origin: May have been picked up from Chris's increasing interest in the [[Magical thinking|occult]]. Generally, the phrase refers to the midnight hours, with the term being inspired by the ancient belief that supernatural events, like witches, demons, and ghosts, are at their most powerful at midnight. Chris adopted the phrase in reference to his [[Biological clock|unusual sleep schedule]].

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#B|biological clock]]
</blockquote>

;Woahly
<blockquote> 1. ''(interjection)'' Expression indicating surprise.
<blockquote>'' Who is it Rosey? The Stew's almost ready and I... '''Woahly'''..!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Sonichu15-2019draft-p11.png</ref>
</blockquote>
Origin: Portmanteau of "woah" and "holy... (as in the beginning of saying holy shit)," found in [[Sonichu 15]].
</blockquote>

;woman up
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' The female equivalent of manning up.

<blockquote>''Fellow autistic people! I encourage you to man and '''woman up''' [Subtitle: "It is Socializing In Real Life or Dust!"] respectively! Go out into the real world, and make real friends with full, great quality friendships! Do it now!''</blockquote>

Origin: Used in the second part of Chris’s Autism Tutorial, where he insultingly attempts to rally up all autistic people (regardless of their functionality) to form proper friendships, all while missing the point of “manning up”.
</blockquote>

;[[Women's rights]] (or Women's Lib)
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' Any kind of behavior towards women that does not involve abusing them physically or mentally.

<blockquote>''Christian Weston Chandler, A Man For The Women, For the '''Women's Rights''', For the Women's Justice, For the Women's Peace.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Other_documents</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' The right for women to not be depicted with a [[CWC-isms#P|pickle]].

<blockquote>''FOR OUR '''RIGHTS AS WOMEN''' AMONG ALL PEOPLE, I WILL OVERPOWER THOSE SLANDEROUS JERKS!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic8P58.jpg</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(noun)'' The act of women protesting by stripping down naked.

<blockquote>''Well, once we get our centerfolds shot and uploaded, hopefully those bastards will see and admire our beautiful lights.''</blockquote>

<blockquote>''Yeah, and if nothing else, we can still have a lot of fun trying.''</blockquote>

<blockquote>''With our lord's support in our peaceful protest, we can win this fight.''</blockquote>

<blockquote>''Victory for '''Women's Lib'''''.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic8P51.jpg</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: Chris's understanding of sexism is botched up beyond belief. His zeal towards the rights of women is believed to have originated from watching the 1964 Disney film, Mary Poppins. He was particularly influenced by Mrs. Banks, who has expressed distaste for unequal treatment for women in 1910 London. As to be expected, Chris missed the point of this part of her character, and instead used this in order to justify his treatment towards the women he meets. Chris also believed that the term "sexism" only applies to forms of violence against women, and not necessarily representing in a condescending manner.

</blockquote>

;wooden nickel
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Acoustic guitar.

<blockquote>''I got the idea of the challenge from him COPYING me playing Boston's "More Than A Feeling" on Guitar Hero on his old '''Wooden Nickel'''; if he wants to copy on Guitar, he may as well be challenged in a Sing-Off.''<ref>[[Katie Bay E-mails 3]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In real life, a wooden nickel is a now defunct form of currency used during the Great Depression. His use probably refers to the phrase "don't take any wooden nickels" - that is, he is calling the acoustic guitar a semi-worthless imitation of his Guitar Hero controller.
</blockquote>

;worse
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' Severely; extremely, in an adverse manner

<blockquote>''IMHO, having Seinor Citizens for Parents throughout your whole life is no picnic; they are '''WORSE''' Overprotective.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 6]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;worst mud, muck and bodily fluids

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Mud, among [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|other disgusting things]].

<blockquote>''The DAMN Trolling-Stupids have manipulated me; smeared my once good name through the worst mud, muck, and bodily fluids.''<ref>June 2012 Facebook posts#Damn Michael Snyder</ref></blockquote>

Origin: First used by Chris in a June 2012 Facebook post ranting about that damn [[Michael Snyder]]. Refers to having his good name or reputation dragged through the mud, with "bodily fluids" added in an attempt to garner sympathy.
</blockquote>

|-
|
;wrath
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Great [[Chris and anger|anger]] or rage. Considered one of the [[Chris and religion|Seven Deadly Sins]].

<blockquote>''Apparently, my, uh, heed of warning towards Vivian has gone unheard or otherwise SHE DID NOT REALIZE THE FURY OF MY '''WRATH'''''<ref>[[Sign Destruction Video]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Strength sufficient to lift an office chair.

<blockquote>''I HAAAVE THE POWEEERRRR!!! FEEL MY '''WRATH'''!!''<ref>[[Power]]</ref></blockquote>
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

==X==
|-
|
;X2-checking
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' Double Checking
<blockquote>''Just '''X2-checking''' if you got the drawing I left you.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-11-2017-chris-spotted-at-bronycon.33187/page-35#post-2511049]]</ref></blockquote>
Origin: Comes from x2 meaning times two, which means double to Chris.</blockquote>

;XXX-tended
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Sexually explicit
<blockquote>''ESPECIALLY WITH ALL OF THE TRUTH BOMBS AND ROSEY ROSECHU's POST-INTERSEX-TO-FEMALE TRANSITION AND OPERATION NUDES IN THE '''XXX-TENDED''' CONTROVERSIAL VERSION OF MY BOOK NUMBER EIGHT IN 2008!''<ref>[[Jail_Letter - 20 October 2021#22 October]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>
;XXXXX
<blockquote>1. ''(noun, censorship)'' censorship of the word "bitch"
<blockquote>''Mary Lee Walsh made it illegal to distribute the News Dash; I AM VERY ANGRY AT THAT '''XXXXX'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC%27s_Diary</ref></blockquote>
Origin: Chris's only instance of this peculiar censorship is in his [[diary]]. In it, Chris repeatedly refers to [[Mary Lee Walsh]] as an "XXXXX", clearly as a censorship of the word "bitch". Why Chris chose to replace all of the letters in the word with the capital letter "X", instead of using asterisks remains a mystery.</blockquote>

|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Y ==

</blockquote>
|-
|
;y'all should know me by now
|-
|<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' An introduction to complete strangers.

<blockquote>'''''Y'all should know me by now''', but if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of Sonichu, the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon, back on March 17th, 2000.''<ref name=csm/></blockquote>
Origin: His second message on YouTube, addressed to the ED trolls. He would use it several more times after this, possibly making this into his tagline. The introduction is made under the assumption that Chris is [[Chris and his Ego|already well-known]]. May have been partially derived from ''[[The Adventures of The American Rabbit]]'', where a character similarly begins a speech by saying, "You all know me."
</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;yea and merrily
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used to open videos where Chris is feeling [[Messiah complex|messianic]].

<blockquote>'''''Yea and merrily''' to everyone. Welcome to this.''<ref>[[Jesus Christ Chan Sonichu Prime Resurrected and Returned]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''Hey everybody! '''Yea and merrily'''.''<ref>[[Simple Existential Q&A]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A stupid play on "yea, verily", an antiquated phrase meaning "yes, truly", often assumed to have been said by Jesus in the {{w|King James Version}} of the Bible. Although the word "verily" is often used by Jesus in the King James Version, the phrase "yea, verily" never actually appears anywhere in the King James Bible. It does, however, appear in the {{w|Book of Mormon}}.
</blockquote>

;young at heart

<blockquote>1. ''(noun, attributive)'' An individual with childlike characteristics; a childish person.

<blockquote>''Hello Nintendo! Welcome to my Animal Crossing for Nintendo GameCube. I am your host. My name is Christian Weston Chandler. I live in Ruckersville, Virginia and I is [sic] 21 years old and I play because I am '''young at heart'''. So anyway we are going to take a tour of my ci-ty...in Animal Crossing.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Animal_Crossing_Documentary</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I am '''Young at Heart'''; a concept I have kept within myself since childhood.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-27-chris-wants-everyone-to-be-a-manchild-like-him.33726/]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''We, the '''Young at heart''' stand alongside our Liked and Cared others.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-27-chris-wants-everyone-to-be-a-manchild-like-him.33726/]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris more often than not advertises his childish nature as him being "young at heart", as if this was a more positive quality of himself, even going as far as using this as a reason for girls to fall in love with him in his attraction signs <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Attraction_Sign</ref>. This is because Chris can't tell the difference between being a child at heart, and being childish. In his mind, people who are considered "childish" actually lead a happier and more exciting life, since he believes that childlike people are more willing to show off their [[kindness]] and are generally more eccentric. In reality, adults who are "young at heart" generally have a somewhat innocent outlook of life and are generally interested in things considered suitable for children, yet understand their responsibilities as adults, something which Chris has failed to do since graduating [[High School]].
</blockquote>
|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Z ==
|-
|

;zap to the extreme
[[Image:ZapToTheExtreme.png|thumb|200px]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Go out and be brave.

<blockquote>''Go! Sonichu! Go out and '''zap to the extreme'''!''<ref>[[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote> ''Now everyone stay green and go out and '''zap to the extr-r-r-r-r-eme'''. Have a lovely day.''<ref>[[A New, Fun Trick]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: This phrase is first used on the cover of [[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]], where Chris's self-insert tells Sonichu to "zap to the extreme" as if Chris and Sonichu were in a bona fide [[Pokémon]] tournament. Chris would then end up using this phrase time and again, usually completely out of context of its original meaning.
</blockquote>

;zapbud
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A fictitious flower found in the ''Sonichu'' canon; Rosechu's favorite flower.

<blockquote>''Oh, Rosechu, you are as beautiful as a rose, though a '''Zapbud''' is the flower that heals your woes.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_Ode_to_Rosechu</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Essentially the result of Chris attempting to create a mythology around his ''Sonichu'' comics, Chris created some of his own flora as well. Because of how "zapping" was a very common theme in the earlier issues of ''Sonichu'', Chris thought about naming his flora after this one theme. The term has ironically become popular with trolls and enablers, where they name made-up characters and places after it.</blockquote>

<blockquote>2. ''(noun)'' a [[CWC-isms#S|sweetheart]].

<blockquote>''Yes, my blossoming '''zapbud'''. That's why we are here.''<ref>[[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In this context, the term is used the same way a female lover may be compared to a flower. This was clearly an attempt to make the flora have a greater significance by making it sound like something beautiful.
</blockquote>

;zombie-like

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' To be riddled with dementia.

<blockquote>''Also, Barb is literally a Zombie-Like Living Body with little remaining of Barbara (her Soul) within her anymore; that living body is Running on Fumes at this point. She CAN NOT Drive anymore, regardless of Van loss; she has the fridgid mental activity and physical ability like a scared deer in headlights nearly ALL the time since even before June, 2021.<ref>[[Jail Letter - 29 July 2022]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in a [[Jail Letter - 29 July 2022|Jail Letter]] where Chris seems to imply that during his affair with his mother, she might have been declining mentally.
</blockquote>

|}

==References==

<references/>

==Navigation==

{{CWC-isms}}
{{Lists}}
[[Category:CWC-isms]]

CWC-isms

2025-06-13T05:40:30Z

Anemichu: /* F */ fixed red link

<center>{{Honest}}</center>

{{Protip|Please refrain from using CWC-isms casually when writing articles, as this may make them difficult for newcomers to decipher.}}
One of [[Chris]]'s most notorious features is his strange '''vocabulary''', consisting of a mix of fairly standard words, slang, jargon, and various personal coinages.

Some of these coinages originate from a degree of prudery, likely inherited from his older parents and maintained by his childlike nature. Like many children who don't feel comfortable referring to [[Honest Content|adult concepts]] directly, Chris often resorts to creating cutesy euphemisms for a lot of words that anyone else his age would generally use with little reservation, which is common with autistic people. While some of them are understandable — after all, nobody would really relish discussing their [[Butt garments|diapers]] — others, such as "[[tobacky]]" instead of "tobacco", only serve to turn an otherwise normal sentence into an advertisement for Chris's childish nature.

Others are attempts to be clever that fail miserably, for example, he refers to [[semen]] as "[[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009|navy]]", because semen sounds like sea men, [[Random-access humor|get it?]] Still others come from Chris's love of manipulating words, especially backwards spellings, {{w|portmanteau}} blends, “verbing” nouns, or liberal use of suffixes like “- ish” or “-er”. Combine this with the idiosyncratic speech patterns that are common among [[autism|autistics]] (likely since standard language may seem inefficient to explain their thought processes), and you get his so-called '''CWC-isms'''.

CWC-isms may be combinations or butchered versions of words or phrases that already exist, entirely new words, commonplace words that he uses repeatedly in a peculiar or obsessive way, or entirely new phrases that Chris often has to explain afterwards because nobody knows what he's talking about.

==Primary categories of CWC-isms==
Nearly all CWC-isms belong to one of the four following classes:
# '''CWC-neologism''' - a ''new'' word or phrase, unknown until ''created by Chris''. Example: ''[[CWC-isms#L|Lovehogs]]'', a portmanteau of "love" and "hedgehogs".
# '''CWC-homonym''' - an ''existing'' word or phrase, to which Chris has given a ''different meaning''. These may be euphemisms, designed to avoid naming (to Chris) offensive things, or else due to Chris confusing an elevated word's meaning. Example: ''[[Duck]]'', for Chris's penis; ''[[CWC-isms#T|telekinesis]]'', used erroneously in place of ''telepathy''.
# '''CWC-archaism''' - an ''obscure'' word or phrase, known in English but seldom used by contemporary Virginians, which Chris has learned somewhere and has ''become characteristic'' for Chris's way of speaking/writing. Example: ''[[CWC-isms#U|Uncouth]]'', a word now rarely used outside the context of formal etiquette, which Chris used to tell people how much of a jerk he perceive they're being to him.
# '''CWC-misspelling''' - only the ''most notable'' of Chris's ''misspellings'', including deliberate re-arrangements: those which are characteristic for Chris's way of writing. Example: ''[[Geinus]]'', what he deems himself to be; ''[[Pmurt]]'' for Donald Trump, 45th and 47th president of the United States. Chris's sporadic, inconsistent use of some [[Catherine|British spellings]] while otherwise using American English can also be considered under this category.



__NOTOC__

<div style="position:fixed; bottom:0; center:0">{{Alphabet ToC}}</div>

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

==#==
|-
|

;12-9
[[Image:Sonichu 12-9 Cover.jpg|The cover for Sonichu #12-9|thumb|200px]]

<blockquote>
1. ''(numeral)'' A placeholder for the number thirteen.

<blockquote> ''There are no quotes that cite the use of this CWC-ism directly. Chris however used it in lists that exceed 12 items.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/1006915844016869377</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris has shown on a few occasions to dislike the number 13, due to him deeming it an unlucky number. This phenomenon, referred to as [[wikipedia:Triskaidekaphobia|triskaidekaphobia]], is already a popular superstition in American culture, and this is likely where Chris picked it up. His fear of the number has led to some bizarre effects, particularly in his numbering. A famous example of this unusual numbering shtick is in the 13th issue of his Sonichu comics, which he numbered as "Issue #12-9", in which he used an em-dash in the place of a decimal place. The 12-9 itself is meant to represent a value of "almost 13".</blockquote>

;15 minutes
[[File:15 minutes.jpg|thumb|200px|"It takes me fifteen f-yay minutes"]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' [[Masturbation]], the amount of time it takes for Chris.

<blockquote> ''Masturbation takes '''Fifteen LONG, Tiring and Annoying Minutes'''''<ref name=15min>[[Masturbation discussions]]</ref></blockquote>
<blockquote> ''Self-masturbation is really arduous and annoying. Another '''15 minutes''' down the drain.''<ref name=15min></ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris coined this phrase in 2021, using it in chats with the [[Watchmen]] and in the [[Workaholics Anonymous comic]].</blockquote>

;[[4-cent_garbage.com|4-Cent Garbage]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' The headquarters of [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] and [[4-Chan]] trolls in ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]''.

<blockquote> ''You will recognize her [?] as your sweetheart because from a fav- from a favor on her half, your internal clock will be restored fully, your enemies of '''4-cent-garbage''' will be vanquished, so you both will live together in peace. Live freely.''<ref>[[Sonichu 9 Official Videobook]]</ref></blockquote>
Origin: Since ED and 4chan were partly responsible for Megan's breakup with him, Chris decided to get payback on the both of them by combining the both of them into an evil corporation in Sonichu, dubbing it "4-cent Garbage".</blockquote>

;7-incher
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' A penis which measures seven-inches in length.

<blockquote> ''Good thing we stopped for a pack of condoms; it's too bad the regular-size ones break easily on my '''7-incher'''.''</blockquote>

Origin: According to Chris, his penis is about 7 inches, which he actually believes is the average length of a penis of an adult male <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_20#Oral_doesn.27t_count</ref>. Chris has made all kinds of weird euphemisms for just his penis alone such as this one, "ugly growth", and "duck".</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

==A==
|-
|
;abreast
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' full of; filled with.

<blockquote>''It was not until after saving the city from the forces of Count Graduon and his minions, that she realized her form's new assets. And she was '''abreast''' with delight and glee when she found not the Male Part, but a Vagina!''<ref>[[May 2015 Facebook posts]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''In fact, while I am fairly educated about Tribadism and '''abreast''' with theories, I would appreciate some experience with a lesbian or two who knows what she likes to enlighten me better, including on sensual massage and all that.''<ref>[[May_2015_Facebook_posts]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris uses this word when discussing feminine anatomy and lesbian sex, evidently because it includes the word "breast". He fails to realize that "abreast" actually means "adjacent" or "across".<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/abreast</ref> A possible confusion with the word "abound" or "abundant".</blockquote>

;Adult Swim
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' pornographic or otherwise "NSFW"; containing [[Honest Content|adult content]].

<blockquote>''She still has a great drawing style, even for the '''Adult Swim''' section."<ref>[[CWCSonichu-NightStar2891 DMs]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Refers to the Cartoon Network block ''[[Adult Swim]]''. Chris seemed to only consider the "Adult" part of this block's name, and therefore assumed he could use this phrase to describe anything that's "adult" to him. Note that the Cartoon Network block does not feature pornographic content.

</blockquote>

;adulterous
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' Of an [[Christian Weston Chandler's Adult Chronicles|adult]] and mature nature

<blockquote>''Originally it was supposed to be like, you know, like ages 7 and up, but then I end up going to the content, uh, it could be considered, be like, be like definitely be considered '''adulterous'''.''<ref>[[Lars Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: usually used to describe people who [[Ivy|cheat]] on their [[Blanca Weiss|partners]] (i.e. guilty of adultery), Chris only notices the "adult" component of the word.

2. ''(adjective)'' Insult of unclear nature
<blockquote>''Heeeeey, folks! It's me, [[Clyde Cash]]. I am the ruler of the internet and the internet trolls. I am an '''adulterous''' foe, a bastard and a self-righteous idiot who spends his time wallowing and trolling the one Christian Weston Chandler, and making up a whole bunch of dadgum rumors all over the internet!''<ref>[[100 2267]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris simply throws out the insult without a clear understanding of the word. Possibly referring to Clyde taking [[PandaHalo]] from Chris, though this is more aptly described as cuckoldry than adultery. Perhaps influenced by the verb ''adulterate''.

</blockquote>

;among which
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' Among other things. Et cetera. Also. Additionally

<blockquote>'''''Among which''' I can project myself to (the Ninja Turtles universe)''<ref>[[Dankula]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: [[Autism|Uncertain]]. Chris adopted this phrase and began using it heavily in a number of different contexts through-out 2018. Perhaps the clearest example of chris's over-use of "among which" is the [[Dankula|Count Dankula interview]], where Chris uses the phrase no less than ten times.

</blockquote>

;an' anurr thing
<blockquote>
1. ''(Phrase, transitionary)'' Signifies that Chris wishes to make another point about a subject he is discussing, and that he wishes he were Peter Falk.

<blockquote>''An' anurr thing...CHRIS. Your for real- your real name, as I have been told by Kacey, is only Chris Chandler! No "-tian," no "-topher," just Chris! So, admit that. '''An' anurr thing''', I NAME is NOT IAN! BRANDON!!! SOMETHING!!!!!''<ref>[[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: a corruption of "and another thing". Used constantly when Chris is angry.

</blockquote>
;[[Anaxis bird]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' Signifies that [[Anaxis]] was meant to be a messenger for the information that Chris requested he put in ''A Medium's Guidance''.

<blockquote>
''Perhaps you all may have heard how I came onto this from an '''Anaxis bird'''.''<ref>[[User:Anaxis/Watchmen Source Leaks#"Anaxis Bird"]]</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: A mangling of the phrase "a little birdie told me", indicating that an anonymous source gave someone a piece of secret information. Because of Chris's misuse of the phrase, the other Watchmen present had come to believe that Anaxis was influencing Chris to write both the [[Affirmations List]] and the [[Lovers Attributes List]].</blockquote>

;[[Anchuent Prophecy|anchuent]]
[[Image:Anch.PNG|right|thumb|Chris and Sonichu amazed by the Anchuent Prophecy]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' Describes anything that is archaic in the ''Sonichu'' canon.

<blockquote>
''Well, what's this? I'm havin' an upgrade? Huh! Huh! My- my powers are given me the ability to fly with my wings attached to my head! It's like a w- it's like an add-on! That's optional! Huh! Must have been done by '''Anchuent''' Powers, so awesome I can fly now! Huh!''<ref>[[Sonichu_3_Official_Videobook]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Initially, "anchuent" was taken to be a misspelling of the word "ancient" given Chris's [[Chris and English|poor grasp of the English language]]. Over time, however, it was revealed that "anchuent" was meant to be a portmanteau of the words "ancient" and "Sonichu", adding the "chu" part of "Sonichu" into the word "ancient".<ref>[[Sonichu_3_Official_Videobook]]</ref> </blockquote>

;and shit
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' And additional items.

<blockquote>''I don't want to believe in labels at all but I mean obviously, tale- the incest fanfics have come true '''and shit'''.''<ref>[[Incest call]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''But, yeah, I did not verbally argue as much growing up, and it took facing the even Toughter Moments since 2000 '''and shit''' for me to actually formulate and speak better self-defenses with what is Truth''<ref>[[Jail Letter - 20 October 2021#22 October]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A more profane variant of "and such" (see below). Chris often uses the phrase in unfitting contexts. He may have picked it up from [[Lars]]'s constant usage of the phrase during the 2010 [[Lars Call]].
</blockquote>

;and such
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' And additional items; to add to a list.

<blockquote>''At least to give you all, my patient, loyal Fans and Trolls, something to quell your pallets until Official Merchandise is sold in Official Stores such as Toys 'R' Us, GameStop, Best Buy, Wal-Mart, etcetera '''and such'''.''<ref>[[CWC Blog|Cwcipedia captain's log, 25 November 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris understands the term's meaning, but uses it superfluously.
</blockquote>

;anthropological
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' human-like, anthropomorphic.

<blockquote>''In dressing myself for the burial work, I saw Snoopy had merged with his '''anthropological''' self-counterpart on the C-197 half of the veil.''<ref>[[July 2021 social media posts#Eulogy for Snoopy]]</ref></blockquote>
</blockquote>

;artery

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' art.

<blockquote>''Good evening, but between this and the, uh, oh, and the other clips I would like to present you, uh, a few examples of hand '''artery'''.''<ref>[[CWC - Hand Drawn Original]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Not to be confused with the term for blood vessels. Chris doesn't seem to realize "art" is already a noun and doesn't need the suffix, and that "artistry" also exists.
</blockquote>

;as such

<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' In the manner previously described.

<blockquote>''They just hated me because they don't, they did not understand people with autism. And so they tortured me '''as such'''.''<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris overuses this phrase to the point of self-parody. He's either tacking it on to fill space when he can't think of the next thing to say, or he's peppering it into his language in a feeble attempt to sound intelligent.
</blockquote>

;ass burgers

<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' [[Asperger's Syndrome]]

<blockquote> ''There are no quotes that cite the use of this CWC-ism directly, as Chris instead alludes to it as "a bad cut of cow meat".</blockquote>

Origin: Since the CWCipedia Saga, Chris has been noted for disliking Asperger's Syndrome, viewing it as something that makes autistic people look bad due to the term vaguely sounding like "ass burgers". Chris has alternatively suggested the term can also sound like "something that can be picked nasally", aka "ass boogers".
</blockquote>

;ass manager
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Either a misspelling or a derogatory term for "assistant manager," based on the abbreviation "ass. manager."

<blockquote>''I did not learn until much later that the spritz had done a lot worse than I had imagined it would, as well as learning that they were the so-called "Manager" and "Ass Manager" of that particular store.''<ref>[[December 2014 Facebook Posts#Shit, Meet Fan]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris has only used this term once, when referring to the [[Yellow-Shirted Foe]]. It's unclear if this was a misspelling or [[Manajerk|yet]] [[Jerkop|another]] childish insult based on someone's job title.</blockquote>

;[[Attraction Location|attraction location]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any place Chris may sit to gain the attention of any passing women, only to get promptly kicked out afterward.

<blockquote>''Also, as of early November, I was reemitted into the Fashion Square Shopping Center, and since Mid-December, I totally left the UVA as an '''Attraction Location'''.''<ref>[[Story_of_My_Current_Days]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, having a very difficult socializing with women, thought that sitting around in a certain place and soliciting himself would be a better alternative. Therefore, it would make sense to him to sit in a location with many people in order to gain the attention of several women.</blockquote>

;attraction time

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The time that is spent at an attraction location

<blockquote>''Then, on my next visit to the mall, I felt seriously depressed about what had happened the other day; it killed my '''attraction time'''''.<ref>[[Story_of_My_Current_Days]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;audio-sonic feeling

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the arousing feeling caused by getting hit by sound waves

<blockquote>''Here is a most '''audio-sonic feeling'''. While at the club last night, the [[Chris and music|music]] was loud, maybe reverberating or echoing. The music and beats literally shook up my rack! I actually Felt the music playing and reverbing within my breasts, almost like my breasts had become a pair of speakers. It Felt Amazing and Arousing!''<ref>https://www.facebook.com/cwcville/photos/a.447204945915.244245.167832525915/10152771303590916/?type=3&theater</ref></blockquote>

Origin: As shown in the quote above, Chris believed that he was sexually aroused when sound waves hit him. In actuality, sound, a vibration,<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sound</ref> creates pressure. The louder the sound, the more pressure gets created from the wave. Therefore, very loud music should be able to hit Chris given that he's a [[obesity|huge target]], creating that "arousing" feeling, which is actually an alternation between high and low pressures.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== B ==
|-
|

;B-dog
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Derogatory epithet for women.

<blockquote>''Then that [[Mary Lee Walsh|'''B-Dog''']] ripped up my notes and all, dragged me to her quarters and talked down to me very RUDELY AND HOARSELY.''<ref>[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Childish censorship of the word "bitch"; bitch also meaning "female dog". [[Bubbles Rosechu]] is implied to say this in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], when she shouts "BEEE..!!!" at [[Silvana]].<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_8/Page_95|Issue 8 Pages 94-95}}</ref>
</blockquote>

;bally
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' round; having the texture of a perfectly round ball.

<blockquote>''I've always given her a "'''Bally'''-Scratch" where I stroke her head with all five fingers like as if I was gently squeezing a rubber ball.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_emails_2004-2006</ref></blockquote>

Origin: If one didn't know Chris was referring to his dog, Patti, and that he gives her a "Bally-scratch" on the head, one might conclude that he's fondling someone's genitals. Chris, [[CWC-isms#N|naive]] to how suggestive this sounds, gave this special kind of petting the name "Bally-scratching" because of how stroking her head felt like he was squeezing a rubber ball.</blockquote>

;Be Woman
<blockquote>1. ''(verb phrase)'' Be '''a''' woman.

<blockquote>''I am a Lesbian Transwoman; I am not confused or mentally ill about that; '''I Am Woman.'''''<ref>[[2017_tweets#Proud_to_be_a_feminist]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''How Dare You Insult and be so Inconsiderate of Her like that? '''She Is Woman'''; she would Never Revert Back.''<ref>[[NightStar2891_tweets#She_is_woman]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used regularly when Chris asserts his [[Tomgirl|transgender identity]], notable for the consistent lack of a proper article and capitalization of each word in the phrase. Originally only attested in the first person ("I Am Woman"), a post on Chris's [[Miss Night Star]] Twitter sockpuppet account uses the third person ("She Is Woman"). Technically first appears in [[Sonichu 8]] when [[The Incredible Lioness]] attacks [[Jason Kendrick Howell]], as the somewhat cliché musical reference [[wikipedia:I Am Woman|"I am woman, hear me roar!"]], which may have inspired Chris's broader use of the phrase. This could be a reference to the Bhagavad Gita or Oppenheimer ("Now I am become death, destroyer of worlds.") [[honor roll|but this is unlikely]].
</blockquote>



;[[Biological clock|biological clock]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[Wikipedia:Circadian Rhythm|circadian rhythm]]

<blockquote>'''I have a lot of stored caffeene [sic] in my energy supply, and not only kept me on my toes, but has also messed up my fucking '''biological clock''' as well.''<ref>[[Biological clock]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Although technically not used incorrectly in this context, the phrase "biological clock" is used exclusively for women in their child-bearing years. Possibly a confusion with "internal clock".
</blockquote>

;blangry
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' [[Chris and anger|Angry]].

<blockquote>''Oh, and how 'bout this?! I get '''BLANGRY'''! ''<ref>[[Chris Calls Clyde Out]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Given Chris's belief that he has [[Chris and English|mastered the English language]] and his [[speech impediment]], it's likely he meant to say angry.
</blockquote>

;blue-printed
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Skilled in engineering.

<blockquote>''I like many others, was born a foal; to a '''blue-printed''' Pegasus and a country tomboy earth mare.''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/attachments/screenshot_20171019-235945_01-png.299275/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris portrayed Bob's Pony Counterpart in [[Sonichu 12-9|''Sonichu'' #12-9]] as an engineer, just like the real [[Bob Chandler|Bob]]. Due to Chris's limited vocabulary, Chris knew very little words he could use to describe Bob's profession. Derived from the word "blueprints", the plans set for the design of a product. </blockquote>

;[[Boyfriend-free girl|boyfriend-free]]

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Single; particularly used on women.

<blockquote>''Ahh, well, it's been over a year and ten months now since I started my sweetheart-search; I still haven't found a '''boyfriend-free'''-caring-smoke-free-non-alcoholic-white-girl-near-my-age to build a relationship with from the ground up.''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris’s mission in life used to be to obtain a girlfriend and have sex. However, every chance he thinks he gets, they already have a boyfriend. This has made Chris “fear” girls who already have boyfriends.</blockquote>

;Buddha belly
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Excess fat that gives a person a [[obesity|very round appearance]].

<blockquote>''Okay, well, I admit I do have a '''Buddha belly''', but I am not lazy, I do get out and about, I exercise, I jog and work out, and I eat healthy.''<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: "[[Wikipedia:Buddha|Buddha]]" is a title given to several legendary figures in [[Wikipedia:Buddhism|Buddhism]]. In this case, Chris is making reference to [[wikipedia:Budai|Budai]], who is often known as "Fat Buddha". Chris presumably picked up the phrase from the ''[[Family Guy]]'' episode "To Love and Die in Dixie".
</blockquote>

;bugbears
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[Trolls]], [[weens]], and other Chris-related orbiters who make him miserable.

<blockquote>''Freaking CyberBullies!!!!!!! Real '''Bugbears''', they are!''<ref>[[Apologies to the liked Bronies and Pegasisters; PLEASE UNBLOCK ME ON TWITTER!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Although the term was originally defined in the 16th century as 'a cause of obsessive fear, anxiety, or irritation.', It was given a another definition centuries later to describe a race of hobgoblins made famous by [[Wikipedia:Bugbear (Dungeons & Dragons)|Dungeons & Dragons]]. It's widely believed that Chris picked up the term from [[My Little Pony]]: Friendship is Magic, which depicted these creatures as literal bear-insect hybrids that are first seen terrorizing the ponies.
</blockquote>

;buh bye bay nose
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' but if anybody knows.

<blockquote>''If I knew who you were, I'd give you a kick in da bawls. But I can't, because I don't know who or where you are. '''Buh bye bay nose''' the whereabouts of the... [[JERKS|jerk]]... and just happens to be nearby... or within the state? Give him a swick kick for me.''<ref>[[Christian's Update 13 September 2008]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A result of Chris’s [[speech impediment]]</blockquote>

</blockquote>
;but during the stone age...
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A rebuttal for something obvious being stated.

<blockquote>''You don’t have to tell me twice! '''But during the stone age...'''''<ref>[[Sonichu 2]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: According to the [[Sonichu 2 Official Videobook|Videobook for Sonichu #2]], the phrase originates from how you need to “tell cavemen twice” over anyone else.</blockquote>

;[[Butt garments|butt garment]]
[[Image:Ecp00065.jpg|thumb|Leaked footage of Chris in a butt garment]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' an adult diaper; typically one used to control Chris's [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|fecal incontenence]].

<blockquote>''The doctor corrected that they were liners; he never called them diapers. Neither did Chris- he called them “'''butt garments'''”.''</blockquote>

Origin: To avoid embarrassment from stating that he shits himself constantly, and uses diapers, Chris refers to his adult diapers as butt garments.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== C ==
|-
|

;C-Log
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' Captain's Log.

<blockquote>'''''C-Log''' February 4th, 2010. First off, I'm not dead, and I have a few announcements to make.''<ref>[[I am Alive]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: For quite some time, Chris has had the habit of abbreviating certain words or phrases that begin with "'''C'''", possibly for [[Chris and his Ego|his name also beginning with "'''C'''"]], as well as to put greater emphasis on the letter C in the words he abbreviates. Other examples of this kind of abbreviation include "C-Mas" and "C-Ville".
</blockquote>

;C-Mas
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' Christmas

<blockquote> ''The [[Christmas]] season is upon us, and with that comes the rush for the '''C-Mas''' Turkey, Tree (real or artificial), and of course, the presents. So, Sonichu and the News Dash have some helpful tips to give a better feel of the season to all.<ref>[[Sonichu's_News_Dash#A_Very_Special_Holiday_Chris-chan]]
</ref>''</blockquote>

Origin: See ''C-Log''.
</blockquote>

;C Ville (or C-Ville)
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' [[Charlottesville, VA]].

<blockquote>''Look, you're going to back in '''C-Ville''' tomorrow, I can meet you at the McDonalds at Forest Lakes, what time is good for our meeting?''<ref>[[Vanessa AIM Chat 3]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Generic term for any city whose name fits the pattern of beginning with "C" and ending with "ville," e.g., [[CWCville]], Charlottesville, etc.

<blockquote>''And when you diss Cwcville you disf- you diss every "'''C Ville'''" within these United States.''<ref>[[Do Not Dis C Ville]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: See ''C-Log''.
</blockquote>

;[[Captain's Log|Captain's Log]]
[[File:CWCtrek1.png|400px|right|thumb|The Autistic Generation]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' The classic opening for a vlog video Chris makes to adress the fanbase, which includes the date of production. Replaced in 2015 with "live from home once again".

<blockquote>'''''Captain's Log'''. Stardate: September... 24th, 2008.''<ref>[[Chris Chan Update 24 September 2008]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: One may come to the conclusion that Chris picked up this phrase from Star Trek, however, Chris is neither a fan of the Star Trek franchise, nor has he seen any clips of the show<ref>[[Mailbag_3]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag_14]]</ref>. It is more likely that Chris picked up the phrase from cartoons like [[Family Guy]], which references Star Trek, considering how much he watched the show religiously.</blockquote>

;carniverous
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' evil, vengeful.

<blockquote>''On today's show, we will take a close-up look at the '''carniverous''' jerkops.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComic5P29.htm</ref></blockquote>Origin: A misspelling of "carnivorous". It is unknown what word Chris meant to use here, but "carnivorous" certainly wasn't it.</blockquote>

;[[China|china]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Female genitalia

<blockquote>''I love dykes! DYKES! '''CHINA!'''''<ref>[[CWC's_Second_Message]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, uncomfortable with directly saying the word "vagina", decided to alter the word to a cutesy, similar-sounding word. Based off of a term for porcelain "china".</blockquote>

;coldest shoulder

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' to rebel.

<blockquote>''Those people like me at the very least, NOT counting all of the deceitful people I have had the displeasure of knowing who turned '''Coldest Shoulder''' Against me and STARTED all of the Online Hatred.''<ref>[[April_2012_Facebook_posts]]</ref>

''One of which, Amanda, is one of the Part-Time Manajerks who gives her elders the '''coldest of shoulders'''.''<ref>[[Coffee Place]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A misuse of the phrase "turning a cold shoulder", a phrase used for the negligence of another person<ref>https://www.collinsdictionary.com/us/dictionary/english/turn-a-cold-shoulder-to</ref>. </blockquote>

;Come Adore
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A sermon from Chris's religion.
<blockquote>''That's all for now. Be safe and well.

Mrs. Jesus Christine Chan Sonichu.

Commodore Come Adore<ref>[[Jail Letter - 27 June 2022]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Yet another retarded pun from Chris, specifically based on the [[Commodore 64]].
</blockquote>

;[[Comeuppance|comeuppance]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Male orgasm.
<blockquote>''...I feel my '''comeuppance''' and I come into your mouth, my [[semen]] is inside your mouth and you'd swallow every drop. (...) And right after I'd given you my first round, my first '''comeuppance''', you would take, you would reach down, and you would take your face away from my penis...''<ref>[[Chris Sex Logs]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' [[Semen]], usually immediately after ejaculation. ''See also: [[CWC-isms#N|Navy]]''
<blockquote>''Yeah, and I'm just gonna keep bangin' your breasts over and over again until you get the first dosage of my '''comeuppance'''!''<ref>[[Kacey Phone Call]]</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: Chris uses the sexual slang "cum" as a [[For Julie's Eyes Only|verb]] for orgasm, but he may not realize it can also be a noun referring to ejaculate. In his mind, "comeuppance" apparently serves that purpose, viz., "that which has come/cum up."

In the real world, "comeuppance" is an English noun meaning [[Wiktionary:comeuppance|outcome which is justly deserved]] based upon the common verb "come," i.e., the state of coming forward to receive judgment. He is either unaware of the original definition of the word or does not appreciate the irony of telling women he's going to give them comeuppance.

Note that the contexts of the real word and Chris's version are different. When a woman is rebuked, she receives her comeuppance; when a woman gets Chris's hot load in her face, she receives ''his'' "comeuppance."
</blockquote>

;count you(r) blessing(s)
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used as a retort when someone complains about the quality of your work.
<blockquote>It’s an early thing; it will improve later on. Curb your enthusiasm and '''count your blessing.'''</blockquote>
Origin: In [[January 2020]] Chris was seen using the phrase when he was attacked after chimping out about being blocked on social media. Recently people have been questioning the quality of the newest [[medallions]], produced by [[Praetor]]. Chris, perhaps in an attempt to "calm the trolls down'' tells them to '''count their blessings''.</blockquote>

;crash into slumber (or crash and burn)
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To get so sad and [[Chris and stress|stressed out]] that you get tired from exhaustion.

<blockquote>And… the void in my heart that requires a sweetheart is open again, and it hurts. I hope you jerks and trolls who wanted to break us up… are happy… 'cause all you did was make me feel sad and depressed. And you made me '''crash… into slumber'''… a couple of times. And you know, it takes a lot of stress and exhaust… and such… to make a person feel like they're gonna crash and burn… into a whole bunch of s-- into a long slumber… that just basically sleeps o-- that just basically sleeps off the—uh, what's the word I was looking for? I had it. Ugh…<ref>[[Chris Chan Update 21 October 2008]]
</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris famously said that he "crashed into slumber" in the video [[Chris Chan Update 21 October 2008]], where he shows off how depressed and angry he was with his latest tomfoolery at the time. It could be because that one of Chris' main methods of coping with his stress is to sleep it off, and tried to make it sound hyperbolic by stating that he "crashed" onto the bed, as if he tried to get it done sooner.</blockquote>

;crestfallen
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Sad and disappointed

<blockquote>''I should have been Highly Recognized for my ARTISTIC TALENTS I showed in my Many Art Classes for the Award Ceremonies before Graduation Day. I felt '''crestfallen''' greatly from not getting recognized for any of my Talents. I EXCELLED IN MATH TOO FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Manchester_High_School</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I also HAD Hidden ALL of the Blue Armed Sonic Toys at Toys R Us here, concealed hidden amongst their metal cupboards, so they ALL would NOT be SOLD, and Best Boycotted for The Protest! They remained hidden for the longest time of over a Month; found and reshelved near the 20th of December to my personal dismay and '''crestfall'''. And at Best Buy, ALL Copies of THEIR Sonic Boom Games are STILL SUCCESSFULLY CONCEALED AND HIDDEN from View AND Purchase!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/26_December_2014</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Another obscure word Chris liked to use a lot, even today. It even got to the point where he tried to put it into a baffling progressive tense "to my dismay and crestfall".</blockquote>

;crooks
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Those who may steal Chris's intellectual property for malicious purposes. ''(pl.)''

<blockquote>''I aways keep my eyes open for '''crooks''' who take my [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]]'s name and put it in offensive use!''<ref>''[[:File:116-CWCCop.jpg|116-CWCCop.jpg]]''</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' websites, and even words on websites which communicate lies about Chris.

<blockquote>''And that [[ED]] page is one of those crooks. Every page--every word on the discussion page is a '''crook'''.''<ref>[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A finishing move Chris does on his adversaries in order to "curse" them, publicly or otherwise.

<blockquote>''Hmmm...'''Curse-ye-ha-me-HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/NO_D***_WAY,_IMPOSTOR!!!</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A reference to the Kamehameha energy attack from the [[Dragon Ball]] series, performed in the same way it is in the anime. Chris believes that he possesses [[Chris and reality#Magic|magical powers]]. Typically, these so-called magical powers would be used whenever an enemy gets in the way of whatever he wants to do, since Chris is too afraid to actually fight anyone. Therefore, he will rely on this magical power in order to gain control of whoever is giving him trouble.</blockquote>

;CWC-sense
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The ability to sense Chris's presence.

<blockquote> ''Seriously though, awesome timing coming in, just as we, and Chris, had just finished writing the lyrics...was your '''CWC-sense''' tingling?''<ref>https://www.patreon.com/posts/15092809</ref></blockquote></blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== D ==
|-
|

;D.A.
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' Unexplained, presumably a substitution to avoid the word "dumbass." Most likely ''not'' "District Attorney," although equally applicable to [[Marvey Blaziken]].

<blockquote>''You are obviously a troll trying to pick on my nerves; nice try, '''D.A.'''''<ref>[[Mailbag 15]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris intermittently decides to self-censor his profanities for the benefit of younger readers.
</blockquote>

;da
<blockquote>1. ''(article)'' [[Wikipedia:Eye dialect|Eye dialect]] spelling of the word [http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/the the].

<blockquote>''Y'all know me as [[DJ Jamsta|Jamsta Sonichu]], '''da''' DJ with da power!''<ref>[[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], page 43</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris writes "the" as "da" when he intends for his characters (or himself) to sound laid-back and cool. This is most notable with Jamsta Sonichu, who is supposed to sound like a hip radio DJ and/or a [[Niggos|Jamaican man]]. Chris may intend at times to do the same thing in his verbal communications, although his [[speech impediment]] makes it difficult to tell when he actually means to say "da."
</blockquote>

;Da Update
[[File:Daupdate.jpg|thumb|400px|[[Megan]], comparing Chris's [[Chris and his Ego|attitude]] to [[Dragon Ball Z|Goku]].]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' The latest news.

2. ''(phrase)'' The most recent fail Chris is responsible for.

<blockquote>''Hey, guys! What's '''da update'''?''</blockquote>

Origin: Dialogue used by Chris, in an exceedingly awkward attempt to sound casual, in the pages of [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]. As Chris's [[fans]] have searched the Internet for the latest news from our hero, "da update" has become shorthand for "the latest [[Relics of Fail|failure]] Chris has committed." The phrase became legendary when posted above the Chris-chan talk page on [[ED]] (eventually the page was locked, forcing mass migration to the [[PVCC (message board)|PVCC]]).

</blockquote>

;[[Darling|darling]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A potential lover, even one that shows no affection back at you.

<blockquote>''Thank you, Doopie '''Darling'''. :)<ref>[[July 2017 tweets#Thanks, darling]]</ref>''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris, so hellbent on being [[Chris and kindness|kind]] to just about any potential sweetheart he met, thinks it's appropriate to refer to women he doesn't know outside of the internet by pet names to sound like he really cares for them, despite it being creepy to most other people. Chris's main justification for using this word on women who don't bond with him is that the actor [[Wikipedia:Tallulah Bankhead|Tallulah Bankhead]] used this word a lot, ignoring the fact that she only did this while on set.</blockquote>

;[[Dating education|Dating Education]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' formal education in schools about dating people of the opposite sex.

<blockquote>''Also, in addition, while we also fully support Sexual Education in every high school, Christian Weston Chandler also highly recommends, and would gladly support, '''Dating Education''' classes, because, while Sex Ed is great for the eventual, well-earned intercourse after 3 or more dates, it is vital to learn what to do before that moment. It should be well0taught how to approach and ask one’s member of the opposite gender out for the very first date.''<ref>[[:File:DatingEducation.jpg]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The lack of "Dating Education classes" is something that Chris used to complain about all of the time, because he's simply incapable of finding a [[CWC-isms#S|sweetheart]], and that it would be a great advantage for people of his type to learn how to do so. Chris doesn't understand that a key aspect of obtaining a mate is to develop the proper [[Chris and socialization|social skills]], especially those around [[women]], and that it has very little to do with how much sex he has with them.</blockquote>

;dementia
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A synonym for Chris's [[autism]].

<blockquote>''My brain is blank and, I definitely wouldn't have realized. Word of the day, Dementia. The umbrella term for all the mentally wearing down people, I got some dementia okay? So give me time, give me space, alright? And some slack.''<ref>[[Live Game Stream - C-Log 04192017 - The Shirt]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;detail
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A thing of importance that Chris cannot recall at any given moment.

<blockquote>''I do not have the appropriate calm state of mind to make time to READ those numerous upon numerous small-print '''details''', much less memorize them.''<ref>[[Wikipedia#May 2009 drama]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

<blockquote>2. ''(noun)'' Something that Chris does not understand.

<blockquote>''There was one I remember from then where the essay had a lot of offensive content, including smoking, and I spoke my mind on how offended I was of it. Plus other details I misunderstood that he was expecting in the assignments.'' <ref>[[Jackie E-mails 9]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's ability to retain information is questionable (unless it's about [[Sonichu (comic)|something]] [[Lego|he]] [[Pokémon|obsesses]] [[PS3|over]]). As such, he "misunderstands" and "forgets" a lot of glaringly important things, such as [[Father call|how to live on his own]] and [[Jackie E-mails 2|the fact that he cheated on Ivy]].
</blockquote>

;devotee
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An [[enabler]] of Chris.

<blockquote>''Ah, I believe I have the proper term. Going from "Worshiper", I checked the thesaurus:"'''Devotee'''" in the term sounds better. "Devotees of Chris Chan Sonichu"(DoCCS). This is my better educates and thought suggestion." ''<ref>[[November 2019 social media posts#Devotees of Chris Chan Sonichu]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Believing himself to be a goddess, Chris needed a term to refer to any of his followers. The term was originally "worshiper", but then after a quick thesaurus search, he decided to change the term to "devotees", solely because he thought it sounded smarter. Although technically a synonym of "worshiper", the term "devotee" is more often used in Eastern religions such as Hinduism and Buddhism.
</blockquote>

;Did the do, to do the do
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To have sexual intercourse, likely under deceptive conditions

<blockquote>''[[Lovely Weather|Lovely]] was hot. She mistook me for myself and we went home from work that night, so Lovely and I '''did the do''', and it was awesome!''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_10/Page_2|Issue 10 Page 2}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An even more benign variation of the common euphemism for sex, "doing it". Likely taken from [[Wikipedia:Emission_Impossible|an episode]] of [[Family Guy]].
</blockquote>

;dige
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Marijuana

<blockquote>''My name's [[Inos]]... wha' chu up to? I am eclectic on this hedge... high on the hog... you wan' som' of this '''dige''', mon?''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_10/Page_70|Issue 10 Page 70}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Intended to be part of a coded reference to "Sonichu, Electric Hedgehog Digimon". It is not known why he changed the reference from "Pokemon" to "Digimon".
</blockquote>

;[[dimension]]
[[File:Chrisminecraft.jpg|right|thumb|In a universe of multiple realities, anything is possible according to Chris.]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Either our universe or a fictional one, such as the one in which ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' or ''[[My Little Pony]]'' are set, both held to be equally [[Chris and reality|real]] in Chris's ontology.

<blockquote>''For Our Home World and All other '''Dimensions''', Realities and Worlds; All Of Us! Dance! Dance! Dance!!!''<ref>[[Freestyle Dance With Me, For Our World]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Dumbing down some physicists' hypothetical notion of other physical universes embedded in mathematically higher-dimensional space, which has since seeped into pop culture and thence down to Chris.
</blockquote>

;[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Used as a reference to Chris's fecal incontinence.

<blockquote>''I have NUMBERS OF PAIRS OF '''DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS'''.''<ref>[[IRC_(20_January_2009)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this phrase during an [[IRC (20 January 2009)|IRC chat]] with [[Clyde Cash]] and [[BILLY MAYS]] after they alleged that Chris has a fondness to wear women's underwear. In order to confirm his straightness, he retorted by admitting the fact that he has "NUMBERS OF PAIRS OF DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS". Soon after, due to how humorous the phrase sounded, it became a shorthand for trolls to refer to Chris's fecal incontinence.</blockquote>

;disabled of crafting
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Too apathetic to work

<blockquote>''Since last December with the Lulu.com problems (resolved), that has left me with a bad emotional and mental scar. Leaving me feeling '''disabled of crafting'''...''<ref>[[August 2016 Facebook posts#Too lazy to work]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris being defensive when a customer asked how he could be trusted to follow through on an order, when he had failed to send out orders from his Etsy shop, which resulted in his seller account getting closed.
</blockquote>

;dispel
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' Reject, turn away

<blockquote>''[T]o dispel me is to discriminate against the LGBTQ community as well.<ref>[[Unban_contracts#GameStop|GameStop unban contract]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A misunderstanding of the meaning of the word.</blockquote>

;Dork of Ages
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Someone who deserves scorn for creating an [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] article on you.

<blockquote>He is the '''Dork of Ages'''. Y'all should be sending every last complaint and hatred towards—rain down upon him. Send him every last email you can. Shower him with as much hate as possible until that Encyclopedia Dramatica page is taken down, [gives a thumbs down] along with him.<ref>[[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used on [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] after he created Chris' Encyclopedia Dramatica page. This phrase was [[List of phrases Chris copied from media|taken]] from the American Dad episode "Dungeons and Wagons", where Hayley called Steve the "Dork of Ages" while he played "Dragon Shuffle".</blockquote>

;Drunk, High Aqua Teenatic
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Backstabber.

<blockquote>''You could be a Better, More Supportive Friend, instead of a '''Drunk, High Aqua Teenatic''' with your sweetheart!!!''<ref>[[October 2017 Facebook posts#Quinn breaks up with Chris again]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A bizarre attempt to turn the title of the Adult Swim cartoon, ''[[Aqua Teen Hunger Force]]'' into an insult.</blockquote>

;[[Duck]]
[[Image:BentDuck.jpg|thumb|right|An example of a bent duck]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's penis

<blockquote>''MY '''DUCK''' HUNGERS FOR TOM-TOM TO POUND!!!!!''<ref>[[I_Am_The_TRUE,_Original_CCWC]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Initially "duck" was taken to be a typo of "dick" since the "u" and "i" keys are close together. It was later revealed that Chris was using this neologism as an intentional euphemism to refer to his own penis.<ref>[[Mumble 8]]</ref>

''See also:'' [[CWC-isms#P|pickle]]</blockquote>

;Dyke

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A vagina.

<blockquote>I love dykes! DYKES! '''CHINA!'''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2008]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In actuality, the word dyke (or dike) refers to an embankment, wall, or ridge built to control or confine water. It is also a derogatory term for [[lesbian]]s, which is somewhat ironic, given Chris' homophobia at the time.</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== E ==
|-
|

;elbow-greased
[[Image:Elbow-Greased Strength.jpg|200px|thumb|Chris gets swole]]

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Earned from hard work and exercise

<blockquote>''There are no quotes that cite the use of this CWC-ism. It appears in his [[resume]], where he lists "elbow-greased strength" as one of his "functional skills"''</blockquote>

Origin: A misuse of the idiom, "elbow-grease", a figure of speech humorously used for tasks that involve manual labor only. </blockquote>

;[[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]]''

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any of the characters found in Sonichu which are hybrids of [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] characters and/or Pokemon.

<blockquote>''Since the inspiration and conception of Sonichu, the '''Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon''' on March 17, 2000, I have grown further in his stories, plots and adventures in a series of hand-drawn and computer-edited comic books.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris%27s_resume</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Despite the name, a majority of "Electric Hedgehog Pokemon" are neither Pokemon or hedgehogs. This misnomer may come from Chris's original characters being hybrids of two Sonic characters, both of whom are hedgehogs (Sonic and Amy Rose) and two Pokémon (Pikachu and Raichu).</blockquote>

;emotional differences

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A strong disagreement between two people.

<blockquote>''I told you! It was, it was because of, uh, '''emotional differences.'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call#The_Shit_Hits_the_Fan</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris mentioned that he got terminated from [[Wendy's]] in the [[Father Call]], due to their "emotional differences", possibly meaning that a heated argument between him and his employer ensued.</blockquote>

;empirical
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' resorting to experience to gain knowledge rather than through scientific means.

<blockquote>''So, throw away the book talk; be '''empirical''' and believe what you know is fact'' <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2012_Facebook_posts#Empirical</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris attributed the nearly opposite definition of the word to Jeremy Hilary Boob PhD, a character from [[Wikipedia:Yellow Submarine|''Yellow Submarine'']]. Considering this, Chris must have picked up this strange definition from the content in the Beatles Edition of ''Rock Band''.</blockquote>

;entendre

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Charisma or attraction

<blockquote>''Too much '''entendre'''?''<ref>https://www.patreon.com/posts/15092809</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Derived from the phrase "double entendre", a figure of speech used for words or phrases with a double meaning, typically [[Duck|with]] [[Mass Debating|one]] [[China|of]] [[Recycling|them]] [[Pickle|being]] [[Comeuppance|risque]].<ref>https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/double%20entendre</ref> In English, the word "entendre" isn't typically used outside of the phrase itself, but in many other languages like French and Catalan, it is understood to mean "to hear" or "to understand". Chris, thinking he knows everything there is to know about the English language, once again thought he would sound smart by using this obscure word.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== F ==
|-
|

;[[Fangs|fangs]]
[[File:Showing_Off_Fangs.jpg|thumb|right|200px|How Chris imagined himself when showing off his canines]]
[[File:ChrisCavities.JPG|thumb|right|200px|The reality. The red arrows point to Chris' cavities]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's canine teeth.

<blockquote>''They're called Eye-Teeth, but they feel and look like '''fangs''' of a vampire, dog or something to me.''<ref>[[Sonichu_Girls#Your_understanding_me_fukky_.281_January_2009.29]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I'm not afraid to SHOW MY '''FANGS'''!''<ref>[[CWC_Update_8_January_2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes his teeth to be unordinary compared to most other people's teeth, apparently believing canine teeth are some kind of special trait only a selected few people have. Because he believes his canines to be menacing, he gave them the name "fangs". Once in a while, Chris would show off his decaying teeth to scare his enemies. This usually works, although for the wrong reasons.</blockquote>

;faredoo
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection, imperative verb)'' Parting salutation, akin to "goodbye".

<blockquote>''Vessel of my loneliness for the past three years of anguish. I bid you fond...'''faredoo'''. Adieu. Fond farewell adieu...''<ref>[[The MovingFoward videos]].</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Accidental portmanteau of "farewell" and "adieu".
</blockquote>

;fart-minded

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' dumb and perverted.

<blockquote>Ha Ha! Take THAT, you '''fart-minded''', jerk [[MALE]] among ALL fart-minded, jerk Males that make up the Majority of the Worldwide Male Population! -:D<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivtWQTjXCDs</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in the comment section of a Stopmotion Lego animation, where a ''Lego'' minifigure is in a sexual relationship with a ''Lego Friends'' minifigure. Throughout this video, the Lego minifigure essentially acts how Chris believes most men do. At the end of the video, the male minifigure proceeds to fart, which disgusts the female minifigure. Also a possible butchering of the phrase "brainfart", which is used to humorously refer to a moment of absentmindedness.</blockquote>

;firstly
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' A word that indicates that Chris is about to tell someone why he's right. Often not followed by an enumerated list of reasons, despite the implication.

<blockquote>'''''Firstly''', Aspergers is NOTHING Similar to Autism; Aspergers pertains to MEMORY, Autism is Social Skills. and I'm High-Functionally Autistic''<ref>[[IRC_(02_January_2009)|IRC chat, 02 January 2009]].</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Use of "firstly" to begin a list, rather than "first," is a matter of dispute. While both words exist in the dictionary, "Firstly" has fallen out of common use in speech and tends to sound more formal, perhaps overly so. Chris seems to like this formality, probably because he thinks it sounds smart.
</blockquote>

;fondful
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' fond.

<blockquote>''Faithfully yours with '''fondful''' thoughts; Chris Chan.''<ref>[[Megan Emails, Jan-July 2007|Chris's email to Megan Schroeder]], 06 July 2007</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris apparently doesn't understand that "fond" is already an adjective by itself.
</blockquote>

;for good-like
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' final, but with the imagined possibility otherwise.

<blockquote>''And in June of 2008, he banned me from the store '''for good-like'''.''<ref>[[Wallflower E-mails|Chris's email to The Wallflower]], 18 February 2010</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Confusing modification of "for good".
</blockquote>

;foresee/foretell/foreknow
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To make a wild guess at something occuring, claiming it's a "prediction".

<blockquote>''#Saberspark Is right. This is one reason why I stay clear from certain games and shows. My intuition also senses and '''foresees''' the quality and feel without even having to watch or play it at all''<ref>[[March 2025 social media posts#Brainrot]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(verb)'' To have predicted something that already happened or that someone else claimed would happen, but didn't.

Origin: Chris claims he has the ability to predict the future, an aspect of his divinity. However, Chris only ever makes these claims whenever an event has already happened, claiming he predicted it would, or when he makes a confident guess at the future based purely on his intuition.
</blockquote>

;foundate
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To dedicate, as in a monument or building.

<blockquote>''I, Christian Weston Chandler, re-'''foundate''' this monument that is the PAGE with MY SOLE HONEST TRUTH from my sound mind and heart.''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|1=Christian_in_his_Own_Words#Captain.27s_Log.2C_Stardate:_June_6.2C_2009|2=Christian in his Own Words}}.</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Likely a portmanteau of "found" and "dedicate", or a bizarre attempt to convert "foundation" into a verb.
</blockquote>

;four-boomerang-shaped symbol
[[File:Fourboom.jpg|thumb|right|"G'Day welcome to Auschwitz"]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' minced oath for "[[Wikipedia:swastika|swastika]]," especially the ''Hakenkreuz'' symbol of the [[Nazis|Nazi]] Party.

<blockquote>''Like Most People, I do not care much for Adolf; he was a terrible man, and even in jest, I WOULD NEVER want to portray him, much less, his '''four-boomerang-shaped symbol''' (I know what it is called, but I do not wish to type the word).''<ref>[[Mailbag 5#That wacky Hitler|Mailbag 5]]
</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris was apparently afraid to say the word "swastika," probably for the same reason he used to [[Niggos|fear using racial slurs]].
</blockquote>

;fourth wall

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A boundary that separates [[Reality Cartoon|reality cartoons]] and [[Dimensions|dimensions]] from dimension C-197.

<blockquote>''Hey, Everyone. I have another announcement for you all to do now, for yourselves and our OCs: Break Your Own '''Fourth Wall'''.
<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1195039493130199041</ref>''</blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' An abstract force that prevents people from talking to their OC's.

<blockquote>Our OCs in C-197 often break their '''fourth walls''', because they are aware of us, and it is our time and turn to return the favour.</blockquote>

Origin: Comes from the phrase "breaking the fourth wall", a figure of speech humorously used on characters that acknowledge the audience directly, or state their awareness of the media they're in. Chris has taken this to mean that all dimensions in the universe are separated by this kind of barrier, therefore calling them "the fourth wall". In a recent Twitter post, Chris has also stated that this mysterious force is the reason why people cannot see or interact with their OC's, but that the OC's themselves are fully aware of their creators, so will eventually break through the barrier every once in a while to speak to people of other dimensions.</blockquote>

;[[Friend Zone|friend zone]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The dreaded moment a sweetheart rejects you.

<blockquote>''A lot of times, especially if the friend in question is opposite of gender 18 or older, they may have sex on the brain. And when that person hears from you that you just want to be friends, or in the other term, put into the '''Friend Zone''', that person will feel like they failed at getting the sex they wanted, or Ever will from you.''<ref>[[August 2017 tweets]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' The lousiest excuse a sweetheart could give for not having sex with Chris.

<blockquote>''Nothing has happened in Women's Rights; the "Friend Zone" is only the LOUSIEST EXCUSE EVER to give to someone the woman deeply cares about and trusts so she could get out of sex or a relationship. I do not take kindly to that Excuse at this time.''<ref>[[Common Questions]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The Friend Zone refers to a relationship where one person desires romance, while the other only shows interest in friendship. Much like his stance on the Three-Date Rule, Chris believed that the Friend Zone is simply another rule explicitly placed on him by some unspecified authority to slow down his progress on completing his [[Love Quest]]. His belief that this is simply an "excuse" to avoid having sex with him reveals a lot on why he was [[Megan|overly-persistent with]] [[Wallflower|some of]] [[Doopie|his sweethearts]]. He couldn't imagine why any woman would not want to have sex with him, so he came to the conclusion that every woman he stalks are simply unfamiliar with sex and what goes into it.</blockquote>

;[[Fuzzy-wuzzies|fuzzy-wuzzies]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The rewards of giving Chris compliments.

<blockquote>''Compliments will get you '''fuzzy-wuzzies'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. Believed to be another example of Chris' random-access humor. May have been derived from an English assignment in [[Manchester High School|high school]], "[[Manchester High Leaks#Warm Fuzzies|Warm Fuzzies for Christian]]".

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#P|prickly-wicklies]]
</blockquote>

{{clear}}
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== G ==
|-
|

;[[Gal pal|gal-pal]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a female friend.

<blockquote>''And also, I would like to give a shout-out to...Ivy, sweet '''gal-pal''' of mine...and her friend Rachel across the hall from her, in a college within these United States!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Update_18_March_2009_More_Updated</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris rarely refers to any of his female friends as just "friends", simply because he thinks that all female friends have the potential to be [[CWC-isms#S|sweethearts]] before they're in the dreaded [[Friend Zone]]. Chris also states that due to his autism, this somehow means that he gets along much more easily with girls than with guys. <ref>Autism Tutorial Part 5</ref> Although this could be more due to the fact that he overall has had much better experiences with girls than with boys growing up, especially in high school. This has caused him to pick up more [[Transgender|effeminate traits and characteristics]]. The term "gal-pal" is typically used by women when they are talking to other people in their social clique. Chris therefore picked this phrase up from the girls he's talked to (possibly using the phrase because he sees himself as "one of the girls"). It is also common for [[homos]] to use this to refer to their female friends.
</blockquote>
;gawd
<blockquote>
1. ''(interjection)'' eye dialect of "god", Used in the place of "god" when it is used to express annoyance, shock, or pain.

<blockquote>''Life is f***ed up. (I had a real stressful Sunday afternoon) '''Gawd'''! Just... GAWD!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/2017_tweets#STRESSFUL_SUNDAY._GAWD.21</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Possibly meant to add dramatic effect to saying "god", which is already used to add dramatic effect.</blockquote>

;gaybian
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a male lesbian.

<blockquote>''Uh… simply put—and I am willing to say this… in sound mind and body: I… am a '''gaybian'''.''<ref>[[Chris_Comes_Out_of_the_Closet]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris only used this word once in the video [[Chris_Comes_Out_of_the_Closet]]. Before this video, [[Clyde Cash]] had threatened to harm [[Julie]] under the condition that Chris refuses to admit that he's gay. Chris being Chris, he had absolutely no idea that he was once again under another elaborate trolling scheme, and had no clue how to handle the situation. Chris thought he could be sly and admit to being gay, while also being attracted to women. Thus, he tacked on the word "gay" onto "lesbian" to create the word "gaybian" so that he can say that he's a "male lesbian", despite this being a complete contradiction within itself.</blockquote>

;geinus
[[Image:Robotnik.jpg|thumb|I'M A MAD GEINUS! [[Doctor Robotnik|ROBOTNIK]]! ROBOTNIK!]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a genius

<blockquote>''Robotnik! Robotnik! I'm a mad '''geinus'''! Robotnik, Robotnik!''<ref>[[Sonichu 1]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An accidental misspelling of "genius", this CWC-ism is the result of Chris's ability to spell, or lack thereof. In his futile attempts to spell words with "eni", he substitutes this with "ein", possibly due to his habit of spelling words phonetically.</blockquote>

;get it through your skulls
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' Used to clarify something to your fans
<blockquote>''So everybody '''get it through your skulls''', I'm the real deal.'' <ref>[[CCWC's Final Warning to the Second CWC]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this term a lot when trying to clarify various misconceptions about him, such as his straightness, and who the real CWC was. Variations of the phrase include "GET IT THROUGH YOUR THICK SKULLS", "Get it through your damn, dirty, immature skulls!", and "Get through your damn, dirty, stupid, idiotic, immature skulls".</blockquote>

;gitar
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' A guitar

Origin: How Chris pronounces the word "guitar".
</blockquote>

;give birth, give the birth
<blockquote>
1. ''(verb)'' To transfer possession of the state of having been born, by bearing as offspring.

<blockquote>''My mother and my father are both really nice, old-fashioned-type people who not only '''gave the birth'''--gave me birth at their ages...which my mother is sixty-six, currently, and my father is currently eighty. They both just turned that way in the last couple of months. And, uh, I was born in 1982. They gave me the birth...then, and, uh, anyway, it was so nice of--for them to give me the, uh, birth during the early [[1980s]].''<ref>[[Chris Chan's Public Announcement]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to think that a sentence like "Barbara gave birth to Christian" is grammatically equivalent to a sentence like "Barbara gave Go-bots to Christian."
</blockquote>

;GO!
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' Having a style similar to the cartoon ''Teen Titans Go!''.

<blockquote>''As MUCH, as I would like to agree; Cute as it may be, it is still '''GO!''' Version, and #GOPony is something we Really do not like.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1211396957203247104</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' Of a descent originating from [[Dimensions|dimension CZ-69]].

<blockquote>''Just; Most '''GO!''' individuals are...NO!!!''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1215833863718567937</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this CWC-ism to describe his distaste for the MLP:FiM spinoff series [[Pony Life]], believing it to be in the same vein as Teen Titans Go! due to its artstyle. He would go around on his [[Twitter]] account spamming Hasbro and/or users showing any interest in the show with some of his TSSSF cards as a means of protest using this euphemism to put it under a bad light.
</blockquote>

;go make a rhyme
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used by Chris to indicate that he is in a [[Chris and writing|poetic]] mood.

<blockquote> ''Oh, Back Off, '''go make a rhyme'''. Love will come your way in good time.<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/913230475774369794</ref> Keep Heart, Have hope and faith. Life is a coinkie-dink strafe. Have an open heart, don’t be afraid. Your sweetie is likely in your friendship parade.''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris intended to write a rhyme in order to sound poetic in a tweet, continuing with the rhyming schtick in several subsequent ones. Due to his own laziness, the best Chris could come up with in terms of words that rhyme with "time" is "rhyme".
</blockquote>

;[[Godjesus]]
[[Image:Jesusbot.jpg|thumb|This is who Chris actually believes in.]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(shorthand)'' God and Jesus Christ.

<blockquote> ''As I have guide, as I was guide [sic] by, uh, God and Jesus. And because I, uh, cheated on Ivy lately, '''Godjesus''' were mad at me, so, even though she r-, even though she requested the recent items of question, sex-, [quietly] sexual stuff--videos and pictures--I am being punished because the trolls are getting their hands on them.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Matthew_5:27,_CWC_Confessions</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And also, who I'd like to thank, '''GodJesus''', our God and our Lord and savior, for their support, for their support as well, I pray to them every day, and I follow, I am guided by Jesus.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Update_9_April_2009</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris appears to be somewhat aware of the Holy Trinity (Holy Spirit, Son, and Father), the three forms that God takes in mainstream Christianity. Despite accepting Jesus as the son of God, Chris believes that God and Jesus are essentially the same entity. As a result, whenever he mentions God, he is never reluctant to mention Jesus in the same sentence. Because of this, Chris made this CWC-ism as a shorthand of "God and Jesus". This CWC-ism was the primary inspiration for the term "[[Godbear]]" to humorously refer to [[Leonard Bearstein]], who Chris has credited for his name change. Chris now no longer uses his CWC-ism, now referring to both God and Jesus as separate [[OCs]]. Chris now calls God "Emmanuelle".</blockquote>

;grand number of pounds
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' Extremely heavy.

<blockquote> ''Note: The chair weighs a '''grand number of pounds'''!<ref>[[Power]]</ref>'</blockquote>

Origin: Used in a video where he tried to prove his strength to [[Vanessa Hudgens]], who was actually [[Joshua Martinez]], by lifting an office chair.
</blockquote>

;grinds my gears
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used by Chris to indicate he is annoyed with something.

<blockquote>Firstly, I got your image in my mailbox; while I thank you for your fanart, No Offense, but I do not appreciate Sonichu drawn looking retarded; I feel it '''grinds my gears''' a bit.<ref>[[Mailbag_2#In_which_Chris_insults_someone_who_drew_a_picture_for_him]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>Something that '''grinds my gears''' is how people are not accepting of the neutral terms of "darling" or "dear".<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:OpenLetter.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this phrase almost every time he wanted to indicate he was annoyed and not outright [[angry]]. It is believed that Chris has picked up this archaic phrase from [[Family Guy]], specifically from a segment from the show called "What Really Grinds My Gears", where Peter is talking about things that annoy him or "grinds his gears".

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== H ==
|-
|

;hand-drawing
[[Image:Chris holding a pencil.png|thumb|Chris holding a pencil|200px]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An original drawn image, as opposed to a facsimile of that image.

<blockquote>''I mean, does that look like a printout to you? No! It's a '''HAND-DRAWING'''! It's the original hand-drawing of the back cover I constantly used! Among all the other hand drawings on my SHELF! In my BINDERS! IN THIS ROOM! In this house!''<ref>[[Chris dispels videogame rumors]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(verb)'' To sketch without the aid of digital technology, such as a computer.
[[File:Sonichuipaddrawing2020.jpg|thumb|A non-example made by Chris.]]
<blockquote>''No, actually, what I thought, is that you skip the '''hand-drawing''' and you draw everything on your PhotoShop with your computer mouse.''<ref>[[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 2]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's process for producing his drawings is to draw them, by hand, on physical paper, and then scan the paper into his computer and use image editing software to add effects like lettering or (for the purpose of breaking the fourth wall) photographs. He takes comfort in the belief that ownership of the original paper drawings is evidence of his authorship and will frequently cite this in defense against perceived thieves and trolls.

Chris also thinks that drawing on a computer instead of paper is an inferior method of producing artwork; he thinks the results look "blocky and low-resolution," which probably speaks more to his [[:File:179-ShineSchuChara.jpg|his own experience using MSPaint]] than the artistic quality of, for example, [[Asperchu]]. The fact that a digital artist like Alec Benson Leary is nonetheless ''using his hands'' does not seem to have occurred to Chris.
</blockquote>

;Haterade

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a metaphorical drink consumed by haters.
<blockquote>''Therefore, for all of you '''Haterade'''-Chugging “GET A JOB!” spouters out there, I suggest you Shut Up and enjoy your ability to settle in a cozy Office or wherever. For the rest of us, the worlds and the dimensions are our Offices, and we are doing our best, so we can reach our respective Fated Destined Promotions. But, I Digress. <ref>[[June 2019 social media posts#Fan art isn't thoughtful when it feeds into Chris's delusions]]</ref>''</blockquote>

<blockquote>''Put down the '''Haterade'''; this is not going against any rules, it is just the way it is. Hey! I still have my flaws, so I am definitely Not a Mary Sue type of OC. Also, if I wanted a shot glass of '''Haterade''', I would read most anything this dimension’s @realDonaldTrump ever wrote.''<ref>[[June 2019 social media posts#Fan art isn't thoughtful when it feeds into Chris's delusions]]</ref></blockquote></blockquote>

<blockquote>2. ''(noun, informal)'' excessive negativity, criticism, or resentment.

<blockquote>''This is in reference to the Nypical '''Haterade''' Comment of “Get A Job” that is not only thrusted upon me, but to everyone who is creative and have powerful in their own respective, individual rights.<ref>[[June 2019 social media posts#Fan art isn't thoughtful when it feeds into Chris's delusions]]</ref>''</blockquote>

Origin: Originally said by Lars in the 2010 [[Lars Call]]. Chris then used it almost nine years later. Likely a pun on the sports drink Gatorade.
</blockquote>
;[[heart level]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's way of measuring his emotional state

<blockquote>''100% Change the number to change your '''heart level''' and you can write a sentence to indicate how you feel.''<ref>[[Heart_level]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The concept of the "heart level" most likely stems from Chris's inability to understand emotions. As an alternative, Chris tends to use video game terms in order to measure such emotions.</blockquote>

;heal
<blockquote> 1. ''(verb)'' to ejaculate into someone.

<blockquote>''Had I Not '''healed''' her, she would be dead Late August.''<ref>[[Jail Letter - 16 November 2021]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris had somehow come to the conclusion that sex with his mother would make her more youthful, hence "healing" her.

</blockquote>

;heartsweet
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a [[sweetheart]].

<blockquote>''Rosey, as often as birds tweet, will you be my lovely '''heartsweet'''?''<ref>"[[Sonichu's Ode to Rosechu]]"</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Rearrangement of "sweetheart," possibly coined initially to provide more rhyming options in poetry. Chris primarily uses this term in Sonichu's dialogue, as the character's pet name for Rosechu. When speaking for himself, Chris tends to prefer "sweetheart," although the trolls use "heartsweet" in conversation with him.

''See also: [[sweetbolt]]''
</blockquote>

;heavyweight
[[File:Studalert.png|thumb|Chris does NOT look like Chris Farley]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Stockboy; person employed to move heavy objects and perform other menial labor.

<blockquote>If she gets pregnant and can't work, then I would be working. I would be working VERY HARD AND HEAVILY. [...] If I have to I would be, get one of the '''heavyweights''', that just moves the boxes around the, stock the shelves at a grocery store.<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' heavy.

<blockquote>I do not think Chris Farley looks like me at all, plus he was a LOT more '''heavyweight''' than me, and he was more wild than me.<ref>[[Jackie_e-mails_Part_2]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, as usual, has to repurpose words rather than use the existing words that already mean what he wants to say.
</blockquote>

;hedgehog-defensive (or hedgehog)
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Protecting oneself by curling up into a ball, just like a [[Sonic the Hedgehog|hedgehog]].

<blockquote>And I do understand all that. Believe me, and I need not be reminded of the worst part, but my '''hedgehog-defensive''' state and all of the tears and leaking mucus and whole body paralysis that happened to me then and there will haunt me in reminder of that.<ref>[[TooManyGames#Personal_space_talk]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>@MLPSilverQuill, having one’s own spirit killed is really not fun nor funny at all. And, believe me, I was literally in a worse huddled position than what I see here, and I FELT DEVASTATED at that moment. I went full '''Hedgehog Defensive''' and let my quills keep others back. It Hurts<ref>[[April_2019_social_media_posts#Hedgehog-defensive_state]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Replacing the likes of his [[Megatron pistol]] and his [[pepper spray]], Chris has adapted the habit of rolling up into a ball to protect himself from unwanted physical contact. The protective state he dubs "the hedgehog-defensive state" is most likely based off of the spin-dash attack from the Sonic the Hedgehog franchise, which the titular character uses to attack foes.</blockquote>

;[[hermaphrodite]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A derogatory term for passing transgender women, particularly those that haven't gotten bottom surgery.

<blockquote>''OH MY GOD!!! UGH!!! ARE YOU REALLY A '''HERMAPHRODITE'''?! I'm sorry, but that naughty picture just really shocked me and made me want to throw up. *deep breath* You do have a pretty face, but what happened just now is just like the movie, "The Crying Game", or the Thanksgiving episode of "The Cleveland Show".''<ref>[[Mailbag 25#It's a trap, again!]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' A person of an ambiguous gender, or who is female, who also has a penis.

<blockquote>If a '''Hermaphrodite''', I would raise it to be male regardless since it would not have any eggs anyway. Plus big bonus for (him) in sex with all women (lesbians included I would imagine).<ref>[[List of OkCupid Answers]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin:A misuse of the archaic term for intersex people. Chris appears to use this term to refer to someone he deems as "almost a woman", which is also shown when he referred to some of his female characters as "all female" when having their penises removed. Chris used this term when he noticed that the sweetheart [[Bailey Jay]] had a penis, and she explained to him her experiences as a transwoman. Chris also notably talked about how if he had a "hermaphrodite" as one of his offspring, he'd raise them as a boy. Chris's rather specific usage of this term also shows some of his prior beliefs about gender before he transitioned himself, such as who he deemed "male" or "female" in the first place.</blockquote>

;[[HEXBox]]
[[File:KillThatHexBawx.jpg|thumb|]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any of the video game consoles made by Microsoft, primarily the Xbox 360.

<blockquote>I never cared for the '''HEXBox''', and frankly it LACKS heavily in comparison to the Wii and PS3, PLUS YOU HAVE TO PAY THEIR FEES TO EVEN GO ONLINE OR DOWNLOAD DEMOS WITH IT.</blockquote>

Origin: Due to his [[Chris and brand loyalty|Brand Loyalty]], Chris had an irrational hatred for the XBox, simply because of how much you've got to pay for it to access some of its content<ref>[[Mailbag_5]]</ref>. Because Chris viewed this device as a curse to humanity, he tacked the word "hex", which is defined as being a curse, onto the original name of the console.</blockquote>

;hide behind/under his mother's skirt
<blockquote>1. ''(idiom)'' To behave in a cowardly, immature fashion.

<blockquote>''You come to me now. Come face me like a man. Unless you want to continue being called a cow-a quivelling coward who '''hides under his mother's skirt'''.''<ref>[[Challenge for Clyde II]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An antiquated phrase alluding to children literally hiding behind their mother's skirts when frightened.
</blockquote>

;hippo on one's head
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A predicament or unpleasant situation one is currently facing

<blockquote>''I'M WET. I'M COLD. THERE'S A HIPPO ON MY HEAD. AND CLEARLY, I'M NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO DO THIS ON MY OWN.''<ref>[[:File:JailArt15.jpg]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Someone's [[wikipedia:Hippocampus|hippocampus]]

<blockquote>''(EVERYBODY has a Hippo on their head; it is called the Hippocampus)''<ref>[[:File:FSM2.PNG]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris states in an e-mail directed at [[Regina Novakova]] that the phrase originated as an example of his [[random-access humor]], apparently as a pun of the word "hippocampus". Following from this, he would famously use the term in a [[HippoOnYourHead|Flipnote animation]] of a person literally getting crushed by a falling hippo, and then use the term several more times to describe the "weight" of the hippo on people's heads. He has lately used this term to describe his struggles with being in jail in a drawing sent to [[Praetor]].

</blockquote>

;[[homo]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A male homosexual

<blockquote>''Yes; the '''Homos''' I have heard from try to push their damn lifestyle in my face, and I DO NOT CARE FOR THAT AT ALL; What they do behind closed doors is None Of My Business, and I still Do Not Care to know a Damn Thing about it.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Common_Questions''</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' A non-passing transgender woman, particularly one Chris doesn't deem an authentic woman

<blockquote>''So I would- so I would say, good luck being a fake woman because you'll never be able to achieve true femdom! And you'll always be a dang homosexual male, 'cuz you're born that way, you gonna to stay that way pretty much even if you're gonna- if you're gonna have your dick either chopped off or tucked in! People are still gonna look at you so ill. In the majority of this country.''

''Anyway, that's my response for now.''

''Damn '''homo'''.''<ref>[[Response to ADF]]</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(adjective)'' homosexual

<blockquote>''Every one of you who thinks I'm '''homo''' and calls me that—-because I am not; I'm straight! I'm straight!''<ref>[[CWC's_Second_Message]]</ref></blockquote>

4. ''(adjective)'' relating to homosexuals

<blockquote>''Again, to reiterate the issue, THE GOD DAMN F***IN' '''Homo''' Ads MUST BE GONE!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Blog</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Before the [[Tomgirl Saga]], Chris had a hatred for homosexuals, out of fear that he'll become one himself. Even uttering words like "gay" and "homosexual" would make him uncomfortable. Chris also believed that those that strayed too much from their assigned gender at birth would turn out as being gay, which explains his defensiveness towards his more effeminate traits.</blockquote>

;[[Honest Content|honest]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' NSFW, containing adult content.

<blockquote>''Parental Advisory - VERY '''HONEST''' content.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic10P97.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris only has a slightly good understanding of what honesty is. However, Chris doesn't seem to understand when it's most appropriate to be honest. In his mind, to attract mates, he has to be honest all of the time, even if this includes instances of his sexual misadventures. Chris knows that he's not supposed to discuss such topics publically with ordinary people, so he would have to keep such things in secret. Therefore, in his mind, it would be the honest thing to do to discuss such actions.
</blockquote>

;Hurtful Truth Level
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A point at which honest criticism should be stopped so as to avoid hurting a person's feelings, regardless of the usefulness of the advice.

<blockquote>''And another thing, When constantly exceeding that '''Hurtful Truth Level''' to me, it feels like to me you're, and you may as well have, told me, "I Hate You! I Hate You!", and forget about me.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 23]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Said in an email to Jackie after she had pointed out several glaring flaws in Chris's lifestyle and personality. Rather than take her criticism to heart and improve himself, he got angry and defensive, wishing that she would show sympathy for him instead.
</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== I ==
|-
|

;I can feel the cosmos
[[File:I can feel the cosmos.jpg|thumb|right]]
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Statement of achievement and oneness with the universe.

<blockquote>''I promise, uh, three da—three pages a day, drawn or colored, but, also with the, uh, website, and God/Jesus's support, I feel like... we will be seeing many new—many new thing. The website will be better. '''I can feel the cosmos!''' Peace.''<ref>[[CWC Update 9 April 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Inspired by a line from the game Katamari Damacy, [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UmWxNFq6_3U "Oh, I feel it. I feel the cosmos."]
</blockquote>

;I got a fish

<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Claim that one owns a fish.

<blockquote>'''''I got a fish!''' Would ya like to make a wish?''
''I got a fish Would ya like to make a wish?''
''I got a fiiiiiiiiish! Would ya like to make a wish?''<ref>[[I_Got_A_Fish]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in a song of the same name, where Chris' [[random-access humor]] shines.</blockquote>

;I HATE ME TOO!!!

<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' A self-destructive phrase used to attempt to gain pity from trolls

<blockquote>''You know what, '''I HATE ME TOO!!!'''''<ref>[[You know what, I HATE ME TOO!!!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used as part of the title of a gallery found on Chris’s [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] Page.
</blockquote>

;[[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD]]!
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expressed angrily when you wish to break someone apart to kill them

<blockquote>''Jason Kendrick Howell... you BASTARD! BASTARD! You hacked into everything! You have driven me so beyond the wall, I can't even DESCRIBE it! YOU'RE LAUGHING NOW, BUT... '''I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD!''' Goodbye!''<ref>[[Jason Kendrick Howell message]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used as a [[death threat]] to [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] after he has hacked Sonichu.net.</blockquote>

;IBAChandler
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Abbreviation for "I be a chandler," i.e., "I am a person named 'Chandler.'"

<blockquote>''I am so sick of hearing that stupid name that somebody made up back when I had that '''IBAChandler''' account, and I be a Chandler. You know, "I" being myself, "B" standing for specifying who I am, and "Chandler" being my last name.''<ref>[[Show RESPECT to me, "C"CWC]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(proper noun)'' [[YouTube]] username in use by Christian Weston Chandler during his conflict with [[Liquid Chris]], leading trolls to accuse Chris of being an impostor of Liquid named [[Ian Brandon Anderson]].

3. ''(proper noun)'' Name of a ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' villain based upon Liquid Chris, ironically named for the real Chris's alias.

<blockquote>'''''I B A Chandler''', And I am here to copycatly sieze claim of you hedgehogs and this city from your absent mayor's domain.''<ref>[[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], page 79</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Inspired by [[Bob Chandler]]'s license plate, "I B MR C" ("I be Mister C.").<ref>[[CWC Update 29 July 2009]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;ID
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' Identifying.

<blockquote>''"That is the difference between Trans Gender and Vestites; '''ID''' as the other sex, and dressing like it, respectively"''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-335#post-2635076]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Possibly derived from ID meaning "Identification". </blockquote>

;[[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the extremely high probability that any woman Chris talks to is not [[CWC-isms#boyfriend-free|boyfriend-free]].

<blockquote>''With the '''infinitely high Boyfriend-Factor''', I am not fond of about 99.999999999996% of the total male population, with a margin-of-error of the 4 billionth of a percent (for about 100 men) of whom are okay acquaintences.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Megan_emails,_Aug-Dec_2007</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In general, Chris will almost never find a sweetheart.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sweetheart#Will_Chris_ever_have_a_Sweetheart.3F</ref> Already aware of this fact, but not willing to admit he's not at all attractive to most women, Chris blames it on the fact that most men are "jerks", and that one probably is already dating the woman he's trying to latch onto.</blockquote>
;information overload

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An act of spamming a webpage with pictures.

<blockquote>''I had thought the '''Information Overload''' would somehow Take Down the page; I admit that I was mistaken.<ref>[[Chris chan (CWCipedia)]]</ref>''</blockquote>

Origin: When Chris saw all of the explicit pictures on his Encyclopedia Dramatica page, he decided that the best course of action would be to spam the article with his own pictures. His logic was that if he kept doing this faster than the other editors, they'd have to delete the article, as they just wouldn't catch up with him.
</blockquote>

;instinction

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An instance of something being used a certain way.

<blockquote>''Also, I would have the secondary definition of the word "gay", being Homosexual, REMOVED from the word in the dictionaries, and all '''instinctions''' and sayings of the word will ONLY LEGALLY be used to mean HAPPY, as it was originally intended among songs like "Deck the Halls"''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_and_English</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Once again an instance of Chris trying to sound smart by using a word that sounds foreign to him, made up or otherwise. The end result, however, gives the impression that Chris isn't familiar with the word "instances".

</blockquote>

;intersex

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Relating to any gender identity outside of the gender binary.

<blockquote>''As a Tomgirl, '''Intersex''' of Female Soul with Male Body, and a Tranny Cross-Dresser, I am in full support for Human Equal Rights for everyone."''<ref>[[August 2014 Facebook Posts#Chris comes out... kinda]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used the term "intersex" interchangeably with the term "transgender" on many occasions, and also uses it to refer to Silvana, who actually is intersex. This gives the impression that when he talks about something being "intersex", he means that it isn't entirely "male" or "female".

</blockquote>

;[[Iron Curtain|iron curtain]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The mostly hermetic seal between [[Reality Cartoon]]s, such as the [[Chris and reality|real world]] and the fictional universe containing [[CWCville]], that prevents the [[Dimensional Merge]] from proceeding.

<blockquote>''But we are getting increasing magics, here, with more and more opening portals and growing tears and cracks in the '''iron curtain'''''.<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-11-19-chris-begs-while-posting-creepy-photo-of-barb.63305/post-5610374 Twitter, 19 November 2019]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Coined by Sir Winston Churchill in 1946 to refer to the limits of Russian intrusion into central Europe after the War. Chris presumably heard it once in [[Manchester High School|history class]] and forgot what it meant, unless he is comparing his fictional world to the [[Chris and censorship|Soviet Union]]. Alternatively it was fed to him by the [[Idea Guys]].

''See Also:'' [[#F|fourth wall]]</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== J ==
|-
|
;Jail of Fail
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. A rather unappealing jail to reside in.

<blockquote>''I have a temporary Soul Partner, a Holy Flame Type, you may Remember her (on her repentence tour) keeping me safe, well, not abused, and good, alongside Many (Good) Angels, Spirits, and OP allies in and around this '''Jail of Fail'''. We presently have a genuine Turkish Prayer Rug and a deck of Playing Cards from the Commisary, along with very much appreciated Sports Bra, Socks with no holes, Earplugs, and a few other goodies.''<ref>[[Jail Letter - 4 October 2021]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Said in a letter to the long-time orbiter and enabler, [[Kenneth Engelhardt]].

</blockquote>

;janekop
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. A female [[CWC-isms#jerkop|jerkop]].

<blockquote>''YOU'RE UNDER ARREST. SO SAYS THIS '''JANEKOP'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Feelings_of_the_election_results</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Whereas the term "jerkop" is a portmanteau of the CWC-ism "jerk" and the word "cop", janekop is a portmanteau of the words "jane" and "cop". The word "jane" is a slang word for "woman". <ref>https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/jane</ref>
</blockquote>
;[[JERKS|jerk]]
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. Any male other than Chris and his dad in general, particularly those that Chris dislikes, especially one that gets in the way of his LoveQuest.

<blockquote>''On the flip side, I feel discomfort around men, because they can be such mean and cruel '''jerks'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_Girls</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The term "jerk" is generally defined as "A person with unlikable or obnoxious qualities and behavior, typically mean, self-centered or disagreeable".<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/jerk#Etymology_1</ref> As stated in the quote above, Chris believes that all men to be cruel, selfish, and overall unlikeable. Therefore, he views almost all men as jerks.
</blockquote>
;[[Jerkop|jerkop]]
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. An official of the law.

<blockquote>''I would have left peacefully, in fact, I was ready to go, but I had a prepared speech to say to them stupid '''Jerkops'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Get-Tar_Region</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Since Chris views most officers of the law as jerks, due to how often they'd thwart his LoveQuest, the term is a portmanteau of "jerk" and "cop". Possibly a pun on the word "jerkoff", which is defined as being "a contemptible man".<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/jerk--off</ref></blockquote>

;[[For Julie's Eyes Only|JULAAAAAAAY]]
[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|thumb|Chris preparing for hanky-panky with Julie, using a blow-up doll no less]]
<blockquote>''(interjection)'' 1. An expression used by Chris to indicate how much he'd love having sex for the first time with [[Julie]]

<blockquote>"Oh, Julie...'''JULAAAAAY''', JULAAAAAAAAAAY!!!"<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/For_Julie%27s_Eyes_Only</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris first shouted this infamous CWC-ism in the video [[For Julie's Eyes Only]]. He originally intended to share this video privately with [[Julie]], (unaware that 'she' was actually a 13-year-old male troll), to show what their first date would amount to, despite this breaking his Three Date Rule. Seeing how Chris was somewhat of a porn junkie,<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Chris%27s_Adam_%26_Eve_purchases</ref><ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Miyamoto_emails#Chris_Sets_the_Record_STRAIGHT</ref> Chris must have picked up that during sexual intercourse, one of the people may shout the name of the other person in order to "spice up" the orgy. When the video got leaked soon after, the term started to be used by trolls humorously, to the point where [[weens]] started using the phrase in excess, making the CWC-ism lose its luster.</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;jumping the shark
<blockquote>''(verb)'' 1. To start over from scratch

<blockquote>"I am moving out of this Twitter into creating a new one I created, @CPU_CWCSonichu. New and renewed followers will all be screened by my ally, as to keep out the Haters and Harassers. Starting up new and fresh. '''Jumping The Shark''' from old to new"<ref>[[Misc texts#CPU_CWCSonichu]]</ref>

</blockquote>

Origin: The term "jumping the shark" humorously refers to the point where something once popular which has begun to lose its viewer base pulls an extreme stunt in hopes of garnering attention. The term comes from an episode of the television show ''Happy Days'', where Fonzie literally jumped over a shark while water skiing. Ironically enough, despite Chris' misuse of the phrase, many people could easily say that the comic of Sonichu and Chris as a person have "jumped the shark" several times, especially with [[Retroactive continuity in Sonichu|retcons]] and- of course- Chris's change into a [[Transgender|transwoman]].

</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== K ==
|-
|
;kawaii
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' cute or adorable.

<blockquote>''That look really suits you; you look so '''kawaii''' and cool.😊''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1209184205776797697</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The mainstream Japanese word typically used to describe cute subculture. Chris has used this word in almost all cases where he describes anything he thinks is cute and cuddly, more so in recent times, where the use of this word is no longer taken seriously, and seen as more of a joke to poke fun at [[Joshua Wise|weeaboos]].</blockquote>

;[[Kick the Autistic]]
[[File:CWC gets kicked.jpg|thumb|A self-administered kick]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' America's favorite game

<blockquote>''I REALLY WANTED THAT TRIP SO I COULD HAVE A CHANCE TO IMPRESS MY SWEETEST MEGAN AND POSSIBLY FULFILL MY DREAM OF GETTING MARRIED AND SOON HAVE A DAUGHTER NAMED CRYSTAL. YET NOW I, A FRUSTRATED HIGH-FUNCTIONALLY AUTISTIC 25-YEAR OLD VIRGIN, HAVE BEEN BALLZ-BROKEN LIKE I HAVE THROUGH A BIG CHUNK OF MY LIFE IN AMERICA'S FAVORITE GAME, '''"KICK THE AUTISTIC!"''' *sigh*''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chop_Chop_Master_Onion%27s_Rap_Showdown</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Any action which involves doing something to Chris that he doesn't like

<blockquote>''And if you have so much free time to play the cruelest game of '''"KICK THE AUTISTIC"''', then you CAN and SHOULD put the time to better use; volunteer for a social chore; take up the culture in tasteful art; go out and socialize.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica#21_January</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(noun)'' Any form of discrimination towards Chris for being [[autism|autistic]].

<blockquote>''And so, the world continues to play the world's favorite game of "'''Kick the Autistic'''". I'm gonna need all the luck I can get. *Game Over*''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Vivitheg%27s_AIM_chat</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris had this paranoid idea that the whole world is going against him and his goals, solely due to his autism. In this sense, the fact that so many people supposedly wanted to thwart his goals made him feel like he was being "kicked" around. </blockquote>

;Kra-Kow!

<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase indicating that Chris roasted someone.

<blockquote>''What? I’m just telling the truth. I hear and see WORSE shit from you Haters. At this point, I’d rather look back in that memory than PTSD over y’all’s Hate-Filled content. '''Kra-Kow!'''''<ref>https://mobile.twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1231269768310722560</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. Most likely inspired by the sound lightning makes.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== L ==
|-
|

;Laughs Under Lucricities
<blockquote>
1. ''(backronym)'' backronym for "LULZ"

<blockquote>''Although, F.Y.I., "LULZ" is short for "'''Laughs Under Lucricities'''"''<ref>[[Chris chan (CWCipedia)]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Any form of humor made at Chris' expense

<blockquote>''... your bully of a boyfriend is the Original Author of the "Chris-chan" page that was put up there for the "LULZ", "'''Laughs Under Lucricities'''". Which I don't have to tell you is not only mean and cruel, the page is HORRIBLE''<ref>Chris emails 2008</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: It's likely that Chris first heard of lulz on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]-<ref>[[Chris E-mails 2008#August]]</ref> the slogan of which is "in lulz we trust"- and thus forever associated the term with trolling. Originally he would simply say "LULZ" ''ought'' to stand for "Laughs Under Lucricities," but he soon began implying that it already does.<ref>[[Chris_E-mails_2008|Email]] from Chris to Robert Simmons V on 12 August 2008</ref> Lucricities is seemingly a combination of "lucrid" (another non-word with apparent negative connotations that Chris has used<ref>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 48]]</ref>) and "ludicrous" but falls short of being a portmanteau and is more like the result of a head-on collision of the English language.

</blockquote>

;lesbian soul
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' What Chris believes to be his true [[Chris and sexuality|sexuality]].

<blockquote>''I am an all-around, good natured, high-functioning autistic, Female '''Lesbian Soul''', and Transwoman, artist, gamer and creative type.''<ref>https://www.facebook.com/pg/cwcville/about/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: When Chris declared himself transgender, he continued to be attracted to exclusively to biological females regardless of their own sexual orientation.<ref>[[Women Only Need Apply - No STD's]]</ref> Thus, Chris became a lesbian. As a way to assert to detractors that he was a lesbian, Chris cited himself as having a "lesbian soul" despite previously living as a straight man for thirty years.

 </blockquote>
;level-up king
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' Master of [[card games]].

<blockquote>''There must have been about 6 people including Chris and myself at the tourney and when he won he was jumping up and down a yelling "I'm the '''level up king'''!"''<ref>[[Mimms and Lucas Q&A#Follow-up]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Before his permanent ban from the [[GAMe PLACe]], Chris would play games of Pokemon and Yu-Gi-Oh with some of the other customers. Despite his sick obsession with both games, Chris never developed any type of strategy to compete with other players, making it very difficult to succeed at the game, even when he played against small children. Eventually, when the shop was just down to six people, which included Chris, the manager, [[Daniel Mimms|Mimms]], and [[Lucas]], Chris did win a match against a relatively new player, and excitedly jumped up and down at this accomplishment like a child. Along with this, he shouted the phrase "I AM THE LEVEL-UP KING!"</blockquote>

;like, you know
<blockquote>1. ''(discourse particle)'' Space filler during sentence.

<blockquote>''I don't want too much conflict to happen, '''like, you know'''. You wouldn't want too much conflict to happen, like, you know. I mean-like, you know, between you and him any further. Yeah.''<ref>[[I Love You Kacey]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris' speech consists mostly of uh's, um's, and other vocalized pauses.</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;live from home once again
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' An introduction stating that one is recording themselves from their home.

<blockquote> ''Hello everybody this is Christine Chandler coming to you '''live from home once again''' and we're going to talk about the recent and more obvious topic, of "The Dimensional merge". Yes! This dimension! Right here! 1218. Is going to be merged with our sister dimension "C197" where all of our s- where most of our superheroes, super-villains, OCs, and what have you, and other characters, consisted, have been existing and co-existing. Yep!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Dimensional_Merge_Announcements</ref></blockquote>

Origin: This phrase became Chris's typical means of starting his videos since late 2015, replacing the famous Captain's Log. Although it is sometimes used appropriately (i.e. livestreams), Chris uses the phrase even in prerecorded videos that are not, in fact, live.</blockquote>

;[[Love Quest]]
<blockquote>1.''(noun)'' Chris's former on-going search for a sweetheart.

<blockquote>''As for Wes, I blame all of these happenings on him. If he had not taken my life-long friend away from me, I might have a Pretty Girlfriend today. And I would not have had to set out on endeavoring '''LOVE QUEST'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Since attending [[PVCC]], Chris has embarked on a 15-year long quest to find his true love. Chris constantly failing to achieve this goal was what gave this CWC-ism its name.</blockquote>

;lovehog
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A lover in a relationship between two [[CWC-isms#E|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]].

<blockquote>''Also, I have finished the drawing for you, and I have shown off the Original '''LoveHog''' Couple's Wedding Rings, and their three children: Cerah Rosey, Robbie Sonee and (Shiney Rosey) Christine Rosey.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Katie_Bay_E-mails_4</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A portmanteau of "love" and "hedgehog".</blockquote>

;lucricities
<blockquote>1. ''(pl. noun)'' lurid acts or motivations

Origin: Chris completely made this word up, presumably based on "lucrid," which may in turn be based on the actual word "lurid." According to Chris, the word "lulz" can mean either "Laughs at my expense" or "Laughs under lucricities," so presumably the two contexts are equivalent.
</blockquote>

;lucrid
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' obscene, profane, wicked
<blockquote>''And promoting the hatred, and...drawing such loose—such '''lucrid''' mockeries is not gonna further the story plot or have anything new created, or even gonna help in any way...''<ref name=csm>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. Possibly a corruption of "lurid," given the context. Alternatively, it might be a corruption of "ludicrous." Chris has used this word to describe the homoerotic/dickgirl art on the ED page, as well as the fan comic in which he was depicted as a man-baby. Ironically, even before Chris used this word
</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== M ==
|-
|

;make one's own peeps n' poops

<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' to urinate and deficate at the same time

<blockquote>''Uh, actually, uh, actually Crystal is uh, doing, is uh, doing her preschool homework, and uh, Reg-, and Reginald's been uh, been a messy lil' babychild! '''Made his lil' peeps n' poops'''! And he went, and he went weewee all over the bathroom.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/PlayingHouse''</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from a clip of Family Guy, where Herber the Pervert is letting his dog out to "make his pees n' poops". <ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZtlwEfZEmrg</ref></blockquote>

;Mama
[[File:Christine and pikachu.jpg|right|thumb|Mama Christine with a [[Sonee]].]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' What Chris refers to himself as when roleplaying as one of his [[OCs]].

<blockquote>''I am going to some shopping and donating amongst the artists affected by the COVID virus of this Dimension, on behalf of '''Mama''', Chris Chan Sonichu. Thank you, again, to the individual who bought the book set recently. Still waiting for the set of #TSSSF cards to sign and offer.''<ref>https://mobile.twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1251259373810302977</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes himself to be a parent to his characters. Since he identifies as a woman, he has given himself the alias “Mama”. Chris further shows his lack of self-awareness by not realizing how awkward it is to have anyone, even his own characters (who are presumably teenagers) refer to him as such.</blockquote>

;[[Manajerks|manajerk]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a store manager

<blockquote>'' two Manajerks asked me to leave, because they said that I was loitering; I was NOT!''<ref>[[CWC's Diary#2005]] (20 July)</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A portmantau of "manager" and "jerk". </blockquote>

;[[Mary Lee Walsh|Mary Lee Walshing]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' akin to to Mary Lee Walsh

<blockquote>''She has proven herself to be a cold-hearted, uncaring, uncompassionate, lack-of-understanding, bigoted, discriminating, selfish, '''Mary Lee Walshing''', Witch Bitch!''<ref>[[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Chris Expresses His Outrage for Walmart]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's ongoing resentment against his old college dean has led him to compare a Wal-Mart manager who banned him from her store to Walsh. He apparently fails to comprehend that the "-ing" suffix is generally associated with verbs.</blockquote>

;mashed potato grenade

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a [[Wikipedia:Stielhandgranate|Stielhandgranate]], a special German hand grenade with a handle.

<blockquote>''I want to just kill him; destroy his goody-two-shoes nature, soul, heart and all that shit my '''mashed potato grenade''' could shatter, but leave his body in tact, so I'm not committed fro murder.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2013_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in a Facebook post sent to [[Megan Schroeder]] accusing her of his [[List of places that have banned Chris|ban]] from the [[The GAMe PLACe|Game Place]], where he [[Chris and reality|makes paranoid claims]] of what she, [[Mimms]], [[Lucas]], and [[Snyder]] were thinking that day. A corruption of "potato masher grenade", a common English nickname of the Stielhandgranate<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stielhandgranate</ref>.</blockquote>

;[[Mass debating|mass debate]]
[[File:Mass_Debate.jpg|right|thumb|Massive Debating]]
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' to pleasure one's self; to masturbate

<blockquote>''I've actually done it '''mass debating''' to myself so many times, even with a hunk of - even with an inflatable plastic woman...''<ref>[[Kacey Call 7]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: This particular euphemism comes from Chris's tendency to refrain from using inappropriate language, as well as his unusual variation of a southern accent combined with a minor speech impediment.</blockquote>

;mental block

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's autism

<blockquote>''And, uh, during my high school years, I was used to being surrounded by… girls… in my circle, and after having to, uh, leave them I felt ever so lonesome. And, after the stress from some of the people—people at PVCC, as well as my '''mental block''' of autism, it became hard from me to approach gir—approach the girls like I used to.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_Chan%27s_Public_Announcement</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris refers to his [[autism]] as a "mental block" because he believes the term refers to a disability. In his case, his supposed disability to socialize with girls. In reality, a mental block is the inability to remember a specific thing at a given moment. <ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mental_block</ref></blockquote>

;Meta

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' being able to break through the fourth wall.

<blockquote>''Also, there is no problem with breaking your own fourth wall with us from your dimension, here. Go '''Meta'''. We are certainly Meta with and for you all as well.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1316825180610670592</ref></blockquote>

Origin: From the Greek prefix meaning "after" or "beyond". Chris views all cartoons as being on a dimension higher than our own. According to him, being able to break through the iron curtain entails obtaining a higher mode of consciousness.
</blockquote>

;mislabel

<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' to put a label on Chris or any of his creations in a way he doesn't like, regardless of truth
2. ''(noun)'' a label of such slanderous nature; see also "misunderstanding"
<blockquote>''I am NOT a Dictator. Why are you giving me an even WORSE '''Mislabeling''' than the Homosexual Mislabelings? Why do YOU have to be so bored that you have to make up NEW mislabelings to try and deface me over and over again? ''<ref>[[Common Questions#1_February_2010]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Just about everywhere. He appears to use this term as often as the word "slanderous". Curiously, the redundancy "ill-mislabeling" (as if there were any other kind) has appeared once.<ref>[[CWC Blog#28_December_2009]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;misspeak

<blockquote>1.''(verb)'' to lie

<blockquote>''Sometimes, I have '''misspoke'''. But you are more important to me than ANYTHING. Believe me! I swear. Hand to God. And on my Bible. I'd have to go look for it.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/ToJackie</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Instead of accepting that someone has called him out on [[Lies|his bullshit]], Chris prefers to say he "misspoke". Needless to say, no one has fallen for this ploy.

</blockquote>

;misunderstanding

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a deliberate view that contradicts Chris; see also "mislabel"
<blockquote>''*AND WE WILL NOT TAKE THE '''MISUNDERSTANDINGS''', THE MISLABELS, AND ALL THE LIKE SITTING DOWN!!!''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|1=Issue_9/Page_39|2=Issue 9 Page 39}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Misappropration. Note that it is not, as in reality,<ref>[http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/misunderstanding Merriam-Webster Dictionary, "misunderstanding"]</ref> a mistaken notion (alternatively a dispute) based on faulty information, but a malicious action worthy of [[tard rage]]. Apparently a slanderous troll has to actively "misunderstand" Chris. Also, Chris has used the related word "misunderstood" (participle adjective) as an insult, not realizing that if the troll misunderstood (transitive verb) him, ''Chris'' would be the one that was misunderstood (participle adjective).<ref>[[Mailbag 39#Rosechu_the_transwoman|Mailbag 39]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;modnar
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' random

<blockquote>''I may be '''modnar''', but I try not to be offensive, and if I do, then I am sorry. I can not please Everyone.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter</ref></blockquote>

Origin: "Random", spelt backwards.</blockquote>

;[[Monthly tugboat|monthly tugboat]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's Social Security Disability Service

<blockquote>"I'm getting by livin' with my folks and a '''monthly tugboat.'''"<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Monthly_tugboat#References_by_Chris</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris apparently coined the term "Monthly Tugboat" due to a comparison he makes between gaining money through his SSDS vs. winning the lottery. In his mind, winning the lottery is like riding a "Luxury ship that can easily sink", while gaining money from the government is the same as getting cargo from a ship pulled by a tugboat. <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/BlueSpike_Skype_Logs_12</ref></blockquote>

;morrow

<blockquote> 1. ''(noun)'' Synonym for moral.

<blockquote>''The '''Morrow''' remains: Look up to whoever and whatever you like as your childhood hero like no one else is watching you; remain proud with your choice and preference. 💜⚡️''<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts#Chris supports playing with whatever toys you want]]</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: Unknown, possibly a corruption of the word moral. Used exclusively by Magi-Chan during Chris month-long twitter roleplay in August and September of 2019.
</blockquote>

;Mother Nature errand
<blockquote>1. ''(idiom)'' The bodily urge to either [[Piss|urinate]] or [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|defecate]].

<blockquote>''All right, well, ladies, it’s been fun, but I gotta split and take care of ah... y’know, a '''Mother Nature errand'''.''<ref>[[Sonichu Home Club]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A peculiar take on the idiom "call of nature".
</blockquote>

;[[Muscle bra|muscle bra]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A sports bra used for covering a man's bare chest.

<blockquote>''And you know what, I highly recommend this to every dude who goes around shirtless: wear a '''muscle bra'''. Because nobody, and I mean nobody wants to see your dog-gone ugly pecs, they're so ugly and repulsive, ugh... creeps everybody out.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Clyde_is_Weaker_than_Water</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Contributing to his previous fear of the homos, Chris also had a fear of seeing the bare chests of other men out of fear that it'll make him gay. He therefore suggested that men cover their chests under penalty of the law. Chris most likely adapted this name due to some weird association he makes between muscles and sports.</blockquote>

;my two bolts and a heart

<blockquote>1. ''(idiom)'' Chris's opinion or takeaway on something.

<blockquote>''Okay. I get serious creep and dark vibrations from all of this. I mean, you may do as you will if it feels right with you. Just '''my two bolts and a heart'''.''<ref>[[April_2021_social_media_posts#Dark_vibrations]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's version of the idiomatic expression "my two cents", referencing his emoji signature "⚡️💙⚡️". Chris has also used a similar phrase before while roleplaying as Sonichu, shortening it to just "my two bolts."<ref>[[Sonichu reads and critiques a Fanfic by The Crimson Libertarian]]</ref></blockquote>

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== N ==
|-
|

;[[naïve]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' dumb, lacking intelligence.

<blockquote>''You are such a cowardly, '''naïve''', retarded, individual.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Calls_Out_Three_Na%C3%AFve_YouTubers</ref ></blockquote>

Origin: Chris only seems to understand the most simplified definition of the word. In general terms, the word "naïve" is defined as "showing a lack of experience, wisdom, or judgment."<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/naive</ref> However, in Chris's mind, the word is used to "question one's intelligence". Despite his distaste for the use of the word on him, this turns out to be a commonly used insult by Chris.</blockquote>

[[File:FRENCH-NAVY-CameraObscura.jpg|thumb|Chris travels to France]]
;navy
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' semen.

<blockquote>''You know that, uh—first off, uh, the one... with the '''navy''' being drunk. Yeah. Som—yeah. A b—a—i—a—it's a good idea somet—uhhh... it's a... it's a good idea. But, uh, you know, you don't have to do it if you don't like it, but, uh... I recycle my own semen''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Play on words, i.e, a navy is a collection of seamen/semen.

''See also: [[CWC-isms#C|Comeuppance]]''
</blockquote>

;nearly same
<blockquote>1. ''(Adjective)'' Similar.

<blockquote>''And so I killed about- killed about twenty miles round trip for gas to go find her house. But it turns out that was a troll posing as that girl. [sighs] THE VOICES SOUNDED '''NEARLY SAME'''.''<ref>[[For Chris]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;negligent

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[negligee]]

<blockquote>So, I went onto Adam & Eve's website, and ordered three garments, and a transparent robe. One of the '''negligent''' is about exactly on what I had drawn onto myself.<ref>[[WCT DMs#Sexy negligee]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An obvious mispelling of "negligee", a form of lingerie.

</blockquote>

;neurotypically hindered
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Lacking the proper mindset or intelligence to understand Chris' world building, just by being normal.

<blockquote>''Go ahead; that Is what happened that day, and they did not mind it much. To mock us makes you all Soo '''Neurotypically Hindered'''.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1203938198424035329</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes that the term "neurotypical" refers to having average brain function, rather than lacking any sort of [[Autism|autistic]] traits.<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1207129697752141824</ref> He believes that if one only possesses average intelligence, it makes it impossible for them to fully accept his fantasy world, thus claiming it as a "hindrance".

</blockquote>

;neutral
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' platonic.

<blockquote>''I apologize, but I meant the term '''neutrally''', and I never meant anything from that.''<ref>[[LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And One More thing, Darling!... Talluah Bankhead would be Insulted with your response to the term's '''neutral''' usage. Hmpf!'<ref>[[LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes words like "darling" and "dear", are gender neutral terms. Because of this, he assumes that if he claims that he used it in a "neutral" way, people will know he's not using the term in a romantic tone.

</blockquote>
<blockquote>2. ''(adjective)'' politically centrist or nonpartisan.

<blockquote>''He is a communist! And we do not like communists within this country! We are Republican, Democrat or ''' neutral'''... And I am '''neutral''', so I can go either way, but I do not exactly care much for communism!'<ref>[[Re-Calling Ahuvia]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Niggo|niggo]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An African-American person.

<blockquote>''Chris: [sighs, raises his voice] BILLY MAYS IS THE NEW MAYER OF CWCVILLE!</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Max: Yeah, and also say that "Christian Chandler will be thrown in jail!" CWCville Jail.''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Chris: And Christian Chandler will be thrown in CWCville Jail.''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Max: "Where he will be raped by a bunch of niggers!" Say this one really loud.''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Chris: Where he will be raped by a bunch of '''niggos'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Julie_Reveals_Herself</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A bastardization of the racial slur "nigger". This minced oath was used only once after [[BlueSpike]] persuaded Chris to say: "''BILLY MAYS is the new mayor of CWCville, and Christian Chandler will be thrown in CWCville jail, where he will be raped by a bunch of niggers''". Chris decided to repeat this phrase, but he also thought he could "outsmart" BlueSpike by replacing "niggers" with "niggos" in order to avoid saying the offending word directly. Ironically, a whole year after the incident, Chris referred to [[Surfshack Tito]] as a "nigger" [[Chris Drops the N-Bomb|several]] [[Surfshack Tito E-mails|times]], despite not even knowing what he looks like.</blockquote>

;No fucking shit / N.F.S.
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' obviously

<blockquote>''[[The WCT]]: Don't let [[Jacob Sockness|Jacob]] get close to you ever.''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Chris: '''No fucking shit'''.''<ref name=wctdms>[[WCT DMs]]</ref></blockquote>
<blockquote>''The WCT: The Sockness Saga will be something to watch when Geno gets there. ''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Chris: '''N.F.S.'''.''<ref name=wctdms></ref></blockquote>

Origin: Another instance of Chris attempting to add unnecessary emphasis onto his writing.</blockquote>

;[[Nombie-zazis|nombie-zazis]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' zombie nazis

<blockquote>''Anyway, as for the medical study, and this will require your aid, Magi-Chan. In June of 2015, the scientists have found the gene-like molecule which makes a person turn...ugh..'''nombie-zazis'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Son10revp3.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Replacement for homosexuals and homosexuality in the revised [[Sonichu 10]].</blockquote>

;not-troll
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a victim of trolling.

<blockquote>''Consider who does more harassing, which do you block? <ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-278#post-2549629]]</ref>
<blockquote>
*Every Foul-Mouth Troll
*The '''Not-Troll''' they follow</blockquote>''</blockquote>

Origin: In Chris's mind, only two types of people exist on [[the Internet]], those who are trolls, and those who are victims of trolling. Because the person being trolled is supposedly '''not''' a troll, they are a "not-troll". Chris eventually deleted the aforementioned post, and reposted it, replacing "not-troll" with "victim" to clarify what he was referring to in the first place.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-279</ref></blockquote>

;[[Noviophobia|noviophobia]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the fear that someone you want to date is already dating someone else.

<blockquote>''His one fault, that has restricted him from finding the Ms. Right, he had a major case of '''Noviophobia''', where he is afraid to even approach most ladies, because he thought that they were all already paired up with “A Jerk.”''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_News_Dash</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Because Chris was so frustrated with so many [[CWC-isms#J|jerks]] stealing his potential mates, Chris decided that his envy and hatred of men was a real phobia. Thus, overconfident in his ability to speak [[Spanish]], formed the word "noviophobia" by using the Spanish word ''novio'', meaning "boyfriend", and the English suffix, -phobia, meaning fear . </blockquote>
</blockquote>

|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== O ==
|-
|
;[[OC]]
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation, noun)'' Original Creator. A god or deity, including [[Chris and religion#Delusions of godhood|Chris himself]].

<blockquote>''I recall that there was a Mythos about me online: myself, Chris Chan, I; I was an '''OC''' in my own stories; was I Real in this “Reality” that is Dimension 1218? And then I was confirmed in late 2007 with that blurry photograph of me in a moment of great shock and stress.''<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(abbreviation, noun)'' Original Creation. A resident of a [[Reality Cartoon|cartoon dimension]]

<blockquote>''I am pleased to announce from this collab piece alone, we have ten Sonichu/Rosechu '''OCs''' confirmed for the OC Expansion Packs of our #TSSSF set of cards, and then some, as I’m also delegating with my other friends as well. This is going to be a massive and lovely OC party!''<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Short for ''original character'', a common term used by fanfiction authors for characters invented by themselves and used in their stories yet not present in the source material. Chris believes that fictional characters [[Chris and reality|really]] exist in other [[dimensions]], and under the [[Idea Guys]]' influence was convinced they are deserving of worship. Beginning with the Console Patron Units from ''[[Hyperdimension Neptunia]]'', he has since generalised this idea on his own.</blockquote>

;OH! MY AXELS! (or OW! MY AXELS!)
[[File:Axels2.jpg|thumb|right]]
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expression of pain in one's axles (the central shafts of rotating wheels or gears in a machine).

<blockquote>'''''OOOHHHHHH!!!! MY AXELS!!!!!'''''<ref>[[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Written for [[Ghostbusters|Ghost Buggy]]'s cameo in [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]], based upon the character's tendency to complain about its aching mechanical components.</blockquote>

;OH, MY CHRIS CHAN!
[[File:CWC GoPony reaction.jpg|thumb|150px|right]]
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Exclamation uttered by Chris during his phases of holding a [[messiah complex]] and [[role-play]]ing as [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]].

<blockquote>''Why the Hell would you read that personal shit about [[Chris|Mama]] with [[LoveYouLongTime E-mails, 2013-2014#Chris fucks himself|the penis thing]]? '''[[CPU Blue Heart|Oh, My Chris Chan]]!'''''<ref>[[Chris-Chan: A Comprehensive History]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Typed as a comment for the [[Chris-Chan: A Comprehensive History]] episode involving an embarrassing email.</blockquote>

;old-fashioned<blockquote>
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Holding a belief that may be considered politically incorrect.

<blockquote>''But still, call me '''old-fashioned''' but, I'd rather be- I would not- I'd uh- I'd definitely wouldn't uh... NOT BLACK. Not black.''<ref>[[Mumble_4]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''My father is '''OLD FASHIONED'''; he NEVER gives thought to homos, and he HATES them too.''<ref>[[IRC (03 January 2009)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to regard most traditional beliefs and rituals to be offensive to the general public.

2. ''(adjective)'' Dating back to the 1980s.

<blockquote>''Ah, you can tell this is an '''old-fashioned''' Lego set on account of this—the old-fashioned "LegoLand" on the corner.''<ref>[[Song of Christian]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to believe anything that's been made more than 5 years ago is as old as dirt.

3. ''(adjective)'' Preferring real women over waifus.
<blockquote>''Nothing against waifus and the people who have them, but I Never Really understood the appeal and concept of making out a character from a show who is Dimensions Away from your own league to be any sort of a significant other to you. I’m more '''old-fashioned''' towards real women.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/954587249622077440</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. However, Chris seemed to use this word like this because he's aware it isn't considered customary to be sexually attached to fictional characters over real people.

</blockquote>

;ounce of vagina

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Essentially Chris's way of saying "I'll at least lose my virginity at some point".

<blockquote>''And, as for you, Jason Kendrick Howell… as sure as I am to get at least one '''ounce of vagina''', I have your number, and you're going down!''<ref>[[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Obviously confused when it comes to both euphemisms and basic units of measure, Chris has stated that he is sure to get "at least one ounce of vagina" within his lifetime.<ref>[[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)]]</ref> In the years since, he's gotten at least [[Mia Hamm|two]] [[Barbara Chandler|ounces]].
</blockquote>
;outercourse
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the act of stimulating someone else's genitals.

<blockquote>''I understand. You may or may not have had much exposure to sexual images as I've had, so the idea of a "hand job" (which was the act drawn there) as part of '''outtercourse''''' [sic]'' (versus intercourse) was a surprise to you.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Megan_emails,_2008#Chris_thinks_she_was_scarred_because_she_doesn.27t_know_much_about_sex</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The word "outercourse" is actually another way to refer to dry humping.<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/outercourse</ref> In Chris's mind however, outercourse simply refers to sex which involves touching another's genitals, because the action happen outside of the body.</blockquote>

;overinexperienced
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Being overly inexperienced.

<blockquote>''My Body is sexually overinexperienced, and Starved.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/May_2020_social_media_posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: It apparently didn't occur to Chris that sexual inexperience isn't the least bit comparative, at least not in the context where he intended to use this word.
</blockquote>

;overpowered (or OP)
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' A disproportionate amount of strength, which is worn as a badge of honor.

<blockquote>''If I was a neuro-typical mind, as opposed to '''overpowered''' psychic, I’d have gotten dizzy. ''<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A term normally meant to refer to imbalance in game mechanics. Chris adopted the term at some point during or after the [[Idea Guys]] saga as a way to brag about his nonexistent psychic abilities and ludicrously powerful fictional characters.</blockquote>

{{clear}}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== P ==
|-
|

;parkay
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' an epic style of running

<blockquote>''Hello there, fans! It's Christian Chandler here, live at the downtown mall, where for the Sonichu franchise and city of CWCville, and everything like that, I'm gonna do a '''parkay''' from this point all the way down to the gara--parking garage where, at the end, we will get a nice view of the tent-style theater that's down there where events are held.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_Edge</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In the video [[Sonichu's Edge]], Chris calls his style of running "parkay". Chris confused his running as a form of parkour, an acrobatic sport typically used in the military as a means of practicing the navigation of a complex environment without the use of equipment. <ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parkour</ref>. Given Chris's [[speech impediment]], the word "parkour" somehow came out as "parkay".
</blockquote>

;[[Parody|parody]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any work that "borrows" characters, plots, or styles from other pieces of fiction, whether infringing International [[Chris and copyright|Copyright]] Law or otherwise.

<blockquote>''Any names, or persons, illustrated in any of the Sonichu Comics, except that of Christian Weston Chandler, that may seem similar to anyone in real life, are purely coincidental, or otherwise '''parodic'''.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=File:Issue_8_Cover.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's understanding of what constitutes as a parody most likely comes from his interest in shows like [[Family Guy]] and [[Excel Saga]], the former of which use copyrighted characters to make jokes around them, and the latter of which parodied various clichés found in anime. In his mind, because those shows can get away with using such characters and scenes, that gives him an excuse to do the same thing in his comics as long as he states it's being done as a "parody". Ironically, Whenever Chris spoted an actual parody, he thought that the characters from the original work were being defaced.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Parody#Chris_does_not_understand_the_concept_of_parody</ref></blockquote>

;peanut
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Someone who disregards you, or otherwise does not accept you for who you are.

<blockquote>''So you enjoy it, just do it—don't worry about other people's opi—pinions. Because, uh, compared to the other schools, those people who disregard you are just total '''peanuts'''. And I'm not talkin' Charlie Brown; I'm talkin' 'bout the little nuts after the shells. The real peanut gallery. That would be peanuts, wouldn't it?''<ref>[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Apparently derived from "[[Wikipedia:peanut gallery|peanut gallery]]," a term used to describe the hecklers in an vaudeville audience who would throw peanuts at a performer. Chris's own spin on this concept is to dismiss such hecklers as being insignificant like literal peanuts.
</blockquote>

;[[Pedofork|pedofork]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A pedophile.

<blockquote>''I am not a '''pedofork''', you DORKS!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC%27s_Second_Message</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Created as a half-assed attempt to make "pedophile" rhyme with dork. Coined in Chris's [[Madman Rising]] video, in response to the trolls who were comparing him to [[wikipedia:Herbert_(Family_Guy)| Herbert the Pervert]] from ''Family Guy''.</blockquote>

;[[Pickle|pickle]]
[[File:Pickle Rick.jpg|right|thumb|Chris bought this back in 2018. The brine-soaked irony!]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A penis, particularly one of [[JERKS|any man that isn't Chris]].

<blockquote>''Do me a favor, draw a VAGINA on my Rosechu, Rosechu IS A GIRL; SHE NEVER HAD A FREAKIN' '''PICKLE'''!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Chrisreply3.PNG</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The word "pickle" is one of the few hundred slang words for the word "penis".<ref>https://web.stanford.edu/~eckert/PDF/PenisTesticlesSlang.pdf</ref> It is unknown why Chris prefers to refer to the penises of other men as "pickles", while he calls his own his "duck", but it may have to do with Chris's sexual insecurity and the fact that he legitimately hates actual pickles <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_4#Why_Chris_hates_pickles</ref>, whereas Chris thinks he's special enough to have a cutesy name for his own penis.</blockquote>

;Pfalm
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The act of placing your palm over someone's face or the camera, as if it's the viewer's face.

<blockquote>''Why don’t you tell that to [[Emgo]] before you judge yourself once again for that which you are (mis)judging me of. #BeGeekBeProud #PFALM.''<ref>[[January_2024_social_media_posts#Emgo_and_PFALM]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: According to Chris, it comes from the phrase "palm in your face", combining the words "palm" and "face".<ref>[[CWC_Blog_(Cwclight)#Random_Thoughts_(will_be_updated_from_time_to_time)]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;[[Pmurt]]

<blockquote>1. ''(proper noun)'' The 45th and 47th president of the United States: Donald Trump.

<blockquote>''EID '''PMURT''' EID!!!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Eid,_Pmurt,_Eid</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Donald Trump's last name, but spelled backwards. In Chris's first usage of this CWC-ism, Chris mentioned how "Trump spelled backward is "Pmurt", which sounds like "hurt".<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/September_2016_Facebook_posts#Registered_to_vote</ref>
Due to Chris's strong hatred for Trump, he frequently referred to Trump as Pmurt- believing that the spoken word of a backwards name has the power to degrade and weaken a person.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/U8C43P2A37A8_y_U8C1N023V0L</ref>. In Chris's eyes, if he repeated the word again and again, everyone would turn against Trump and start voting for [[Wikipedia:Hillary Clinton|Hillary]]. Unsurprisingly, Chris had no sway over the election aside from his own vote.
</blockquote>

;point at your snout and oink
<blockquote>1. ''(verb phrase)'' Do something humiliating to yourself.

<blockquote>''You both want me to even Beg, you can go '''point at your own damn snouts and Oink''' like Eric Cartman, and then [[Rape]] yourselves with your own Damn [[Star Wars|Darth Maul]] [[Sex toys|Dual LightSabre]].''<ref>[[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A reference to a scene in the ''[[South Park]]'' episode "{{w|Scott Tenorman Must Die}}", where Scott makes Eric Cartman embarass himself by singing a song about being a "little piggy". Chris said this to [[Clyde Cash]] and [[Surfshack Tito]] upon failing to receive a cash bounty for destroying his own [[PlayStation 3]].
</blockquote>

;poke
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Marijuana.

<blockquote>''Anyway, eclectic! High on the hedge and high on the hog. You want some of this '''poke''', mon?<ref>[[CWC address to Royal Board]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Intended as a demonstration of what "Soni-Chew the Eclectic Heeedge Hog Poke Mon of London, England" would sound like. A coded reference to Pokémon, and may or may not be a play on the verb "toke".
</blockquote>

;[[Polyamorous marriage|polyamorous]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Polygamous.

<blockquote>''I go'' [sic] ''married to Magi-Chan Sonichu and Cryzel Rosechu last March, and then I married Sylvana Rosechu and Mewtwo last June. We all share a '''polyamorous''' relationship.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Miss_Cherry_asks_Chris_about_his_marriages.png</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An etymologically malformed neologism from the 1970's for having multiple romantic or sexual relations at once, misapplied by Chris. </blockquote>

;prawns
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Subordinates or helpers, often those wittingly or unwittingly aiding a sinister character.

<blockquote>''You keep sending out your '''prawns''' to do your dirty work, you coward.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Chris%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica#15_May</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris almost certainly meant to type "pawns" here. </blockquote>

;[[Prickly-Wicklies|prickly-wicklies]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Punishments given for insulting or harming Chris.

<blockquote>''War gets you '''prickly-wicklies'''... as well as punches.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/A_Warm_Fuzzy_Tale</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Refer to ''Fuzzy-Wuzzies''.

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#F|fuzzy-wuzzies]]

</blockquote>

;[[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens]]
[[Image:PVCCitizens.jpg|thumb]]
<blockquote>1. ''(backronym)'' The headquarters of several Sonichu villains.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: The name itself is a backronym of the college Chris attended, [[PVCC|the Piedmont Virginia Community College]]. After experiencing several mishaps throughout his college experience<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College#Kicked_out_of_English</ref><ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College#Kicked_out_of_college</ref>, the dean giving him the cold hard truth about why his [[Love Quest]] is doomed to fail became the straw that broke the camel's back, and Chris thought it would be a smart idea to deface the college afterward in his comics.</blockquote>

;prowldent
<blockquote>1. ''(???)'' Unknown.

<blockquote>There's no quote to cite this from, just a logo in which Chris gives the name "Prowldent Virginia Community College" to [[PVCC]].<ref>[[:File:ProwldentVCC.jpg]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Likely combining connotations of "prowl" and "dent" (either to leave an indentation or [[fangs|teeth]]).
</blockquote>

;Pu Tuhs!
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Shut Up!

<blockquote>''SHE; my Ariel Starter was Female from the start, so '''Pu Tuhs!'''''<ref>[[December 2016 Facebook posts#Favorite Pokemon]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: "Shut up" backwards. Because it is backwards, Chris thinks it is more debasing than the normal version of the phrase.
</blockquote>

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Q ==
|-
|

;q-sand
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' Short for quarter sandwich (i.e. a quarter of a sandwich).

<blockquote>
''So, mom ignored her and ate the '''q-sand''' in front of her.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 31]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Appeared in an [[Jackie E-mails 31|e-mail]] sent to [[Jackie]] dated August 5, 2011. Most likely unnecessarily used as a [[Sonic the Hedgehog|way past cool]] abbreviation.
</blockquote>

;quarters
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An office space; headquarters.

<blockquote>''Then that B-Dog ripped up my notes and all, dragged me to her '''quarters''' and talked down to me very RUDELY AND HOARSELY.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris%27s_Wikipedia_profile</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Whenever Chris says that he's being brought to someone's office, he always refers to it as their "quarters", as if he was being brought to some kind of evil hideout. This could be to add unnecessary dramatic effect to his stories.

2. ''(noun, pl.)'' coins, no matter their origin or worth.

<blockquote>''Uhh. I want a soda, but it takes only C '''quarters''' and I only have W quarters. Do you have any change?''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_9_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The first time this word was used like this was in [[Sonichu 9]], where it is revealed that [[CWCville]] issues its currency in the form of "C-quarters" and "W-quarters". According to this issue, 10 C-quarters, make up a single W-quarter, which ultimately defeats the whole concept of the "quarter" coin. Despite being a part of the United States, CWC-ville still issues this strange form of currency, along with US dollars. Because of this, Chris likely decided to refer to his currency as "quarters" so that it could technically count as US currency.</blockquote>

;quite
<blockquote>1. ''(exclamation)'' A fancy replacement of the word "right" or "correct".

<blockquote>''Arthur: Magi-Chan, it's because of his-- you know, he wants to help all of his friends, and with his ability to contact them all simultaenously at the same time, it's an amazing ability to have.</blockquote>

<blockquote>''Chris: '''Quite''', he is the psychic type, after all.''<ref>[[CatKnight Interview]'']</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adverb)'' to the utmost or most absolute extent or degree; absolutely; completely.

<blockquote> ''Hm. Not enough to, uhh... Well, he knows quite-- he can see '''quite''' a bit far into the future, but although there are details of which you might not be able to see, a point or two.'' <ref>[[CatKnight Interview]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''For a hundred dollars? Th-that's, that's '''quite''', that's uh, it'd take more funds for me to, more funds than that for me to be able to acquire the material figures...''<ref>[[CatKnight Interview]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris infamously used this word, along with "indeed" ad nauseam in his interview with [[Arthur Spatchcock]], believing that doing so is essentially the same as speaking his language, British if you will.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== R ==
|-
|

;raincoat
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a condom.

<blockquote>''You ARE the woman...we gotta stop by [[Wal-Mart|Wall-Mall-Wart]] on the way for a "'''raincoat'''".''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_7_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The term "raincoat" is actually an archaic slang term for the word "condom".<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/raincoat</ref> Given that Chris has been raised by two geezers his whole life, and that part of his childhood has consisted of [[Gilligan's Island|old TV shows]], Chris thought that people would understand what he meant when he states that his Mary Sues are having protected sex with a raincoat.</blockquote>

;[[random-access humor]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' non-sequitur.

<blockquote>''Punchy grew up in a dojo, where he perfected his punches. He is also full of '''random-access humor'''. He lost his tail in a brutal fight.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP5.htm</ref></blockquote>

Origin: According to Chris, his brain is completely random, and it always spews out incoherent garbage. In his mind, this works in the same way a computer processes random-access memory.<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref>

</blockquote>

;rapier
[[File:ReldnahcTheRapier .jpg|thumb|Reldnahc the Rapier]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun, attributive)'' rapist, sexual assailant.

<blockquote>
''Now! My '''rapier''' friend, I would very much like you to get off me, please.''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/sonichu-12-pages-54-60.33547/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris-Chan Sonichu calls [[Reldnahc_Notsew_Naitsirhc#Fictional_biography|Reldnahc Ha-Taque]] his "rapier friend" in [[Sonichu 12|Sonichu #12]] after Reldnahc tackles him to the ground in a suggestive pose and touches his chest, thus (in Chris's hyperbolic mind) "raping" him. As a double double entendre, he could also be using the externally attested definition, as an adjective meaning "witty",<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/rapier#Adjective</ref> and metaphorically referring to a kind of thin, sharp-pointed sword. This is incredibly unlikely due to Chris's basic understanding of the English language, and he most likely didn't know "rapist" is the term for one who rapes, not raper or rapier.
</blockquote>

;reality cartoon

<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' The universe.

<blockquote>
''Life is a cartoon; we are all the characters of the larger; the cartoons we make are part of our own universe; we're all a '''reality cartoon'''.''<ref>August 2017 tweets#"Life is a cartoon"</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Since Chris's life revolves mainly around [[Vidya]] and cartoons, it would make sense to him that the most believable explanation for the universe and everything in it is that it's all a cartoon. Likely related to Chris's known belief that [[Chris_and_reality#Fictional_characters_and_media|all fiction actually exists in alternate universes]]. Chris' interactions with the [[Idea Guys]] made this idea seem even more plausible to him.
</blockquote>

;[[recycling]]

<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' the act of one ingesting their own semen to preserve their sperm count.

<blockquote> I '''recycle''' my own semen, because, uh, you know, yes I do masturbate.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Captain%27s_Log,_Stardate_April_28th,_2009</ref> </blockquote>

Origin: Chris, having very little knowledge of how the male reproductive system works, thinks that men can run out of sperm from masturbating or orgasming too much. Fearing the loss of "potential children", Chris actually thinks that by ingesting the sperm back into his body, his sperm count will stay in balance, thus, he is "recycling" it.

</blockquote>

;reeb
[[Image:4centgarbagereeb.jpg|thumb|Glug! Glug! Glug!]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' beer or any other alcoholic beverage of the like.

<blockquote>''Then he glugs his '''reeb''', heh-heh, and then he conks out.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_8_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, thinking he's so [[Slow-in-the-minds|clever]], decided to censor any mention of the word "beer" in his comics, by spelling the word backward.</blockquote>

;Resident-Evil refrigerator

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The refrigerator in the previous Chandler Household.

<blockquote>''Kitchen very much blocked off all over... with the '''Resident Evil refrigerator''' right there.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Tour_of_Chris%27s_House_II</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris refers to the fridge as the "Resident Evil" kind, because in Japan, the game ''Resident Evil'' is known as ''Biohazard''.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Tour_of_Chris%27s_House_II</ref><ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Resident_Evil</ref> Considering the quality of the household, that name may very well fit the description of the fridge in the state it was in before filming the [[Tour of Chris's House II|Second House Tour]].</blockquote>

;romps in the hay

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' sexual intercourse

<blockquote>''This page, by the way, was drawn before last March, so stuff Has Happened since then, it is all good. Go ahead and Muck It Up in your heads, Trolls; I Am BiSexual, and I Laugh at your Jokes. (Awesome Romps in the hay with him, as well as Cryzel)''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/July_2018_social_media_posts#BronyCon_thoughts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris has used this term since at least 2018.
</blockquote>

;[[Rosechu (species)|Rosechu]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The female counterpart of the [[Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon]].</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: Derived from the appropriately named first Rosechu of CWCville, [[Rosechu]]. The name of the species is a portmanteau of the last name of the ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog]]'' character, Amy Rose, and "Raichu", the evolved form of a Pikachu.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== S ==
|-
|

;[[saga]]
<blockquote>1 ''(noun)'' An ongoing event within Chris' life.

<blockquote>''A Sonichu Special: CWC's Love Quest '''Saga'''''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris was actually the first to use the term "saga" as Christorians know it today, using it as such when describing his Love Quest on the cover of [[Sonichu 4]]. It wasn't until the Miyamota Saga when the term was used by Christorians to describe ongoing events in Chris' life as we know it.</blockquote>

;salty
<blockquote>1 ''(adjective)'' showing more maturity or coarseness than is expected, especially knowledge of [[honest]] topics like [[Chris and sex|sex]].

<blockquote>''Ah, but I am not the weak person they think I am; I am much, much '''saltier'''!''<ref>[[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu'' #4]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Based upon a line from "Bowling Girls", ninth episode of ''[[Excel Saga]]'': "But I'm not the sweet little girl I was a few minutes ago! I'm much, much saltier now!" "Salty" in this context derives from naval lingo, since the most experienced sailors would have greater exposure to both the saltwater seas and worldly experiences.
</blockquote>

;[[Scale of Respect|scale of respect]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's way of measuring his respect for other people.

<blockquote>''I'll consider knocking you and Susan up my '''Scale of Respect''' each by 2 points''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Scale_of_Respect</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, like most other autistics, tends to view the world based on numerical values due to their lack of understanding of certain abstract concepts such as respect. Because of this, Chris made his very own numerical scale to decide on who should be respected, compared to who shouldn't.</blockquote>

;seinor
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Misspelling of senior.

<blockquote>''A cool Junior or '''Seinor'''-Year student, and follow their example on asking others out''<ref>[[CWC Blog]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An example of how the “i before e rule” escapes Chris.

</blockquote>

;self-epic
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' describing a situation which is epic, and at the same time related to Chris and his various clones.

<blockquote>''And I will square-off in the TRULY '''SELF-EPIC''' Battle between me, and my Dark Half.''<ref>[[An Important Update]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: [[Chris and his Ego|Self-explanatory]].</blockquote>
</blockquote>

;self-masturbation
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[Mass debating|masturbation]].

<blockquote>'''''Self-masturbation''' is really arduous and annoying.''<ref name=15min>[[Masturbation discussions]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris decided to add the prefix "self-" to make it clear that he was stroking his own [[duck]], apparently unaware that use of said prefix is redundant (the term masturbation typically implies self-pleasure unless one specifies otherwise).</blockquote>
</blockquote>

;self-sexually active
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' in the habit of [[Mass debating|masturbating]].

<blockquote>''And Another Thing, yes, I will admit I was '''self-sexually active'''; WAS. You all turned me off of Sex LONG Before I even thought of coming out as Trans in ‘14.''<ref>[[February 2020 social media posts#On seeing his father's penis]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A modification of "sexually active".</blockquote>
</blockquote>

;ship
[[File:Chillaxingcard.jpg|200px|thumb|An example of a "shipping".]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An act of two or more OCs interacting with or performing any given action towards one another, regardless of any romantic feelings.

<blockquote>''You must take a Pony card from the grid and reattach it elsewhere with this '''Ship'''. That card's power activates. At the end of the turn, until the Pony card attached with this '''Ship''' is discarded of removed from the grid, it gains the Keyword Villain.''<ref>[https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:EpicOnlineBully.jpeg]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An abbreviation of the word "relationship". Chris learned the term from the card game ''[[Twilight Sparkle's Secret Shipfic Folder]]'', a My Little Pony fan game satirizing the popular internet trend of shipping. He used the game as another creative medium to sell items to fans, trolls, weens, and enablers.</blockquote>
</blockquote>

;shitful
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' hurtful; defamitory.

<blockquote>''And this is the last time I will ever say anything in response to your '''shitful''' and hurtful comments and hatred for Hate's Sake!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2014_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Shitful is a vulgar slang word, synonymous with words like "boat-load" or "truck-load". Chris may have seen the "shit" part of this word and assumed that it was a more profane version of "hateful". Disregarding its actual meaning, the word to Chris is used for situations that seem "shitty" to him.</blockquote>

;[[SLGBTQ]]

<blockquote>1. ''(acronym)'' an extended acronym for LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender) which includes "straights" and "questioning people".

<blockquote>''Considering your logo there, Texas will be feeling more love from the '''SLGBTQ''' community; give us props and Love, Lone Star State.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/September_2017_tweets#Hurricane_Harvey_and_SLGBT</ref></blockquote>

Origin: When Chris first used this acronym, he didn't explain what groups the "S" or "Q" were supposed to represent, making plenty of people confused. Eventually, Chris revealed that the "S" represents '''s'''traight and cis-gender people, while "Q" represents "'''q'''ueers" or "'''q'''uestioning people". Chris believes that if he included straight people into LGBT, then those particular people would feel more invited to join into the community. Considering the fact that gay people are minorities, adding the "S" to LGBT only defeats the entire purpose of identifying people as LGBT in the first place.</blockquote>

;[[Slow-in-the-minds|slow-in-the-mind]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a mentally handicapped person

<blockquote>''And finally, after a hard "odd" day, he rides home on a bus, but unfortunately, it had a few "'''slow-in-the-minds'''" on it.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/A_Week_With_Christian_Chandler></ref></blockquote>

Origin: While the exact origin of the term is unknown, slow-in-the-minds was first used by Chris in a high school assignment.<ref>[[Manchester High Leaks#Help This Unborn Child]]</ref> "Slow-in-the-minds" works as a stand in for the less-socially-acceptable "retard", so it's possible that Chris created this CWC-ism in order to self-censor.

</blockquote>

;slow-minded

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' mentally retarded

<blockquote>''As for what had happened during PVCC, in a nutshell; about Mid-Summer, 2003, I've realize upon revolation that I needed a girl friend to make into a Sweetheart from the Ground-Up, so with a sign (which I've later realized that it made me look '''slow-minded'''; the "R" Word), I've started my Enduring Love Quest.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_emails_2007#February</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''OK, I can definitely name you a few reasons, like there was this one [stutters] …there was this one '''slow-minded''' individual named Tony. He was like as big as-he was as big and strong as an ox. He just kept on making all the moanings and noises and whatnot, and he sometimes even-even-a couple of times he even spat on me, and he even bopped me on the back of the head once or twice during the whole-during the whole time I knew him there.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Kacey_Call_9</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' stupid, but not quite retarded

<blockquote> ''I'll admit I have had some '''slow-minded''' moments. But I am certainly not totally retarded.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call#Crossing_the_Na.C3.AFve_Line_.281:46:21-1:52:36.29</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;SNERGEN FLERGEN!!!
[[Image:SNERGEN FLERGEN!.PNG|thumb|200px]]
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' A phrase one may shout out when asked for attendance.

<blockquote>'''''SNERGEN FLERGEN!!!'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic9P6.jpg</ref>
''-What?''

''Uh...here!''
</blockquote>

Origin: An obvious example of Chris's [[CWC-isms#R|random-access humor]]. This weird phrase appeared in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], when the cast was asked for their attendance during a [[CWC-isms#D|Dating Education]] class. When [[Wild Sonichu]] was asked for his attendance, he blurted out this phrase as Chris's many attempts to be funny in his comics. Given Chris's childish sense of humor, it would make a whole lot of sense for him to include a character randomly blurt out a nonsensical phrase out of nowhere.</blockquote>

;snooze cruise
<blockquote>1. a long period of slumber

<blockquote> ''Next, he had Trigonometry...I'd hate to be Christian when his nerves kicked into action after waking up from a "notey" '''snooze cruise''', but I was.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/A_Week_With_Christian_Chandler</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from ''[[Wikipedia:Sonic Adventure|Sonic Adventure]]''.

</blockquote>

;somecummpentydifferent
<blockquote>1. ''(Phrase)'' Used to announce a change in subject.

<blockquote>''Anyway and now for somecummpentydifferent stay tuned for '''somecummpentydifferent''' — a bunch of good pushups!''<ref>[[Getting Foam Ed]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(Phrase)'' Used to announce use of [[random-access humor]].

<blockquote>''And now for '''somecummpentydifferent'''. BUUUUNG! And now it's Monty Python's flying elephants. Du tu du tu du tu du. Du tu du tu du tu du. Johan, why is people running away? I don't know, Greeg, why is people running away.''<ref>[[CWCFlyingElephants]]. Note this is the very first thing he says, so there's nothing to be completely different ''from''.</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris is trying to say "And now for something completely different" like John Cleese does on [[Monty Python]]. Suffice to say Cleese's ability to say three multisyllabic words in rapid succession exceeds that of Chris.</blockquote>

;[[Tobacky|somkey]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' The quality of having smoked recreationally, be it tobacco, marijuana, or some other substance.

<blockquote>''Thank our mayor, Mr. Christian Weston Chandler that CWCville is a clean city; nobody has to go home drunk or '''somkey'''!''<ref>[[Sonichu 8]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A simple corruption of the word 'Smokey', used by [[Jamsta Sonichu]] and [[Lolisa Rosechu]] during their report on [[Sonichu 8#Spring Break, 2008!|Spring Break, 2008!]].
</blockquote>

;[[Sonichu (species)|Sonichu]]
<blockquote>1. (noun) The male counterpart of the Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: Derived from the appropriately named first Sonichu of CWCville, Sonichu. The name of the species is a portmanteau of the name of the titular character of ''Sonic the Hedgehog'', Sonic, and "Pikachu".</blockquote>

;soo
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' Very, Very much.

<blockquote>''Dear Blanca, I am '''soo''' happy that you were revealed as my True, Honest Sweetheart-To-Be''<ref>[[Chris's Letter to Blanca]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In writing, Chris often adds extra o's to the word "so" to prolong the "o" sound and show added emphasis. This has the (unintentional?) effect of mimicking the speech patterns of a Valley Girl or an effeminate homosexual. However, where most people would add two or more o's, (e.g., "I love you sooo much!"), Chris frequently only adds one, resulting in "soo," which makes the word look like it's supposed to be pronounced "sue".

This may originate from pamphlets published by [http://www.channing-bete.com/ Channing Bete], [[Autism|short and uninformative]] self-help pamphlets often handed out at churches, the last page of which often feature a summary headlined by "Soo…" Given his distrust of help from anyone other than [[Rocky]], it is not entirely impossible that Chris has read Channing Bete pamphlets occasionally.

This is one of many recurring jokes in the [[Sonichu Audiobooks]] in which the narrator pronounces words like "soo" as they are literally spelled, instead of how Chris intended them to be read.
</blockquote>

;soul-bonding
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Sexual intercourse as a means of purifying someone.

<blockquote>What had happened was Literally a Divine Mission, commissioned to Christine and I by Emanuel (GOD above Gods), herself, to Heal and Cleanse Barbara's health and soul and being and Clear her of remaining sins and regrets through Coddling, Talking, and Supportive '''Soul Bonding''' to mainly Extend her Life, personally by Divine Intervention.<ref>[[Jail Letter - 4 October 2021]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris has somehow come under the delusion that having sex with his mother would "purify" her, and extend her lifetime, all through the act of bonding each other's souls.

</blockquote>

;soup beds
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Homeless shelter with beds

<blockquote>'' I mean, we have soup kitchens and we have '''soup beds'''. We should really combine the two into SOUP HOTELS!''<ref>[[A Public Announcement for Congress]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris tries to distill his "soup hotel" idea into its two components, but he mangles one of them by retaining the "soup" prefix.
</blockquote>

;sourdough region
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The crotch area

<blockquote>''Its weak point is still the '''sourdough region''', but it would take FIVE KICKS to get to it''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_4_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In his Sonichu comics, Chris has decided to make the main weakness of the jerkops their crotch. The weakest of the jerkops take only one kick to be taken down, while higher-ranking jerkops, such as [[Jerkhief]] take five. The reason why Chris refers to this spot as the "sourdough region" is unknown, but most of his other CWC-isms already tend to sound so nonsensical to begin with, it barely even matters.</blockquote>

;spike on one's shoulder
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' refers to the act of holding grievances towards someone.

<blockquote>''There was a whole bunch of misunderstandings between me and my employer, and he had a '''spike on his shoulder''' against me.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A confusion with the phrase "chip on one's shoulder".</blockquote>

;spot
<blockquote> 1. ''(noun)'' A small amount.

<blockquote>''the recent 43.98 purchase was actually a ''spot'' of Wheeling and Dealing I did; I actually spent less to make a profit.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jackie_E-mails_15</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris likes to retardedly incorporate British English into his sentences when he has the chance, possibly to sound more classy than he actually is. The phrase "A spot of X" is a British English idiom referring to a small amount of something.</blockquote>

;sticky dream
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A wet dream

<blockquote>''After falling back asleep Chris had a "'''sticky dream'''."''<ref>[[Ivy Q&A]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris claims that a "wet dream" actually refers to wetting one's bed as opposed to nocturnal emission.
</blockquote>

;straight path
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The quality of being heterosexual and cisgender

<blockquote>''And, besides, if you stray away from the '''straight path''', it can really jeopardize the entire future of the world and the human race.<ref>[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]]''</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Before the [[Tomgirl Saga]], Chris had an intense fear of "falling off the straight path". When he states this, he is essentially referring to being on the path to straightness, in the same way a normal person would refer to someone being on the path to success. Chris also had this unrealistic idea that being in contact with gay men would suddenly make him gay too, which would therefore make him fall off the path. Possibly also an allusion to the phrase "straight and narrow" and/or the Biblical passage Matthew 7:14: "Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it."</blockquote>

</blockquote>
;[[Sub-Episodes|sub-episode]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The side stories in the [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]] comics.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: A result of Chris' use of [[Chris and English#Television jargon|television jargon]] in his comics.</blockquote>

;sumbah
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Minced oath for "son of a bitch."

<blockquote>''Yo, Christian, thanks for saving my sister from that crazy '''sumbah'''''<ref>[[Sonichu Special 4]], page K-4</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Probably based upon "sumbitch."
</blockquote>

;[[Sweetbolt|sweetbolt]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A pet name used by [[CWC-isms#E|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]].

<blockquote>''Ahh..that salad was great! What's wrong '''sweetbolt'''?''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP11.htm</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' A sweetheart.

<blockquote>''I understand, and I will NEVER put it against you. Yes, as your '''SweetBolt'''. :)?''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP11.htm</ref></blockquote>

Origin: When Chris first worked on his Sonichu comics, he tried to incorporate as many references to electricity as he can, in order to match with the Pikachu part of the titular character. A portmanteau of the CWC-ism "sweetheart" and "bolt".
</blockquote>

;[[Sweetheart|sweetheart]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A potential lover.

<blockquote>''Oh, gee, I'm sorry Bionic, but back then I was na- I was naive on dating and all that, so I just didn't think of it at the time. But if you a '''sweetheart''', Meg has created quite a few foxy characters. If she's cool with it, you could go out with one of them.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_6_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Another cutesy pet name given to candidates of his Love Quest.</blockquote>

;[[Sweetheart from the Ground-Up|sweetheart from the ground-up]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An ideal sweetheart beyond the friend zone.

<blockquote>''For days to weeks to months to years, I Felt So Lonesome and Incomplete. But I didn't STOP! In the name of Love, and the fact that there had to be a Boyfriend-Free Girl out there, somewhere, for me to get to know, grow a strong companionship with and make into a '''Sweetheart from the Ground-Up''', so in later years, after the inevitability of my parents leaving me, I WON'T BE ALONE. And I can eventually realize my dream of being a good husband, and father of a pretty girl named Crystal.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days</ref></blockquote>

Origin: As stated, Chris intended to use this weird phrase to indicate that he wants an ideal gal-pal well beyond the friend zone. Chris thought this phrase sounded so clever, that he used it constantly.</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== T ==
|-
|

;teenages

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The 13-19 age group; teenage years.

<blockquote>''Ahem... hello, ladies and gentlemen, girls and boys, and dudes of all '''teenages''', as well as the, uh, gals.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In Chris's [[Future Message]], he attempts to talk down to just about every age group. In order to do this, he starts his video off with the quote above. Chris clearly couldn't think of a way to refer to teenagers, so he decided to refer to such people by "teenages". A butchering of "people of all ages".</blockquote>

;teir
[[File:Teir.png|thumb|200|Chris spelling tier wrong.]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Misspelling of tier.

<blockquote>''$1 '''Teir'''''<ref>[[Patreon]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Yet another example of how Chris is unaware of “i before e”. In a June 2019 update, he managed to spell tier wrong throughout multiple descriptions, despite the correctly-spelled word being visible right on the page.</blockquote>

;telekinesis

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Telepathy, i.e. communication through long distances, usually via psychic or supernatural means.

<blockquote>''I’ve been communicating with her through '''telekinesis''', and she sounded very lonesome.''<ref>[[Silvana]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Whereas tele'''kine'''sis means ''moving'' objects from a distance with psychic powers (c.f. ''[[wikipedia:kinetic energy|kinetic]]''), Chris has never used the term properly. [[Magi-Chan|Psychic]] [[Silvana|characters]] in the [[comic]] have both powers of telekinesis and telepathy, but Chris has only used the former to refer to both.
</blockquote>

;Temple

<blockquote>1. [[14 Branchland Court|Chris's house]].
<blockquote>''Food for Barbara is also appreciated, and Visitors who personally offer genuine Kindness and Good Intentions are all encouraged to visit the '''Temple'''.''<ref>[[Jail Letter - 4 October 2021]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In [[2019]] Chris designated his house as the "Temple of CWC Sonichu" due to his growing [[Messiah complex]].
</blockquote>

;That was a straw that sold the blade to the executioner

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' That was the final straw.

<blockquote>''And on top of that, literally doxing someone on [[Kiwi Farms|Kiwi]], because someone has a hold over [[Bismuth|Naught]] to the point of him having to feel very insecure about himself. And the topper, in my eyes, one of y'all sent threats to [[Praetor|Anni]]. Fortunately, she completely missed and overlooked that memo in her inbox. '''That was a straw that sold the blade to the executioner'''.''<ref>[[MKR DMs]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used the phrase in listing his grievances against some members of the [[Watchmen]].
</blockquote>

;theoretical ex

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' One of the trolls who posed as a potential love interest for Chris during the classic period of trolling, between 2008 and 2011; a catfish, generally-speaking.

<blockquote>''Yeah, it’s like, you know, even when I try to make a new relationship, uh, especially among the '''theoretical rex-, exes''' I had, I still could not tell which was which…''<ref>[[Catie Date Conversation Transcript#Chris's history with the trolls]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris started calling the trolls who pretended to be his girlfriends during the classic era "theoretical exes" around the time of his date with [[Catherine|Catie]]. When pressed by Cousin Al as to what he meant, he cited that people may not always be who they say they are on the Internet.
</blockquote>

;This Viral Event

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The worldwide Coronavirus ([[COVID-19]], SARS-CoV-2) outbreak in early [[2020]], which began in [[China]] on New Year's Eve [[2019]] and has since become the most severe pandemic since the Spanish flu of 1918. Regarded by Chris as a trivial excuse to cancel a perfectly good ''[[My Little Pony]]'' convention.

<blockquote>''The Bottom Line is that '''This Viral Event''' is actually a better step in our own developments and evolution, as well as a deity-level test to sort out the weak from the moderate and strong of mental and soulful intervals, and nothing else.<ref>[[March 2020 social media posts#Chris finally weighs in on the coronavirus pandemic]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's [[Chris and religion|theodicy]] assigns any misfortune in the world to the Dimensional Merge. As the disease's spread has caused many governments to forbid large gatherings as a sanitary measure, it has become a [[Chris and His Ego|personal inconvenience to Chris]]. He believes that the pandemic will soon be stopped by [[OC|fictional characters]]' efforts,<ref>[March 2020 social media posts#COVID-19 a sign of dimensional merge]</ref> making it nothing but a transient event.</blockquote>

;[[Tobacky|tobacky]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' tobacco or tobacco products

<blockquote>''If I could, I would take every last ounce of '''tobacky''', put 'em on a rocket, and shoot 'em up to the Moon.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: American English slang, used by Chandlers since 1856,<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/tobacky#English</ref> and for [[random access humor]] since 1928.<ref>[http://www.uwosh.edu/home_pages/faculty_staff/earns/song.html Back in Nagasaki Where the Fellers Chew Tobaccy]</ref> Chris hates the act of smoking cigarettes so much that even uttering the word "tobacco" makes him feel uncomfortable, so Chris uses this as a retarded [[wikipedia:minced oath|minced oath]].<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica</ref></blockquote>

;tom-tom
[[File:Duck Pounding Some Tom-Tom.jpeg|thumb|A duck pounding some tom-tom real hard]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' female genitalia.

<blockquote>''MY DUCK HUNGERS FOR '''TOM-TOM''' TO POUND!!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/I_Am_The_TRUE,_Original_CCWC</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from the short Adult Swim music video, ''Pound my Tom-Tom'', which served as the intro to the cartoon, ''Lucy, the Daughter of the Devil''.<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r1DVoH0Njow</ref> Considering Chris barely understands anything adult, the fact that this was meant to be a bad euphemism, which the character, Lucy, used to avoid directly mentioning her vagina, flew over his head.</blockquote>

;[[Tomgirl Pictures|tomgirl]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A femboy, which is a person who identifies as male though still cross dresses.

<blockquote>''I am '''Tomgirl'''.''<ref>[[:File:I_am_tomgirl.jpg|PSN comment as of 6 April 2011]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: analogous to "tomboy", i.e. a girl who likes boy-stuff.

</blockquote>

;too many crooks

<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expression of dissatisfaction with an overabundance of evildoers.

<blockquote>''Well, call it--this was "too many crooks." '''Too many crooks!''' Too many crooks! And that ED page is one of those crooks.''<ref>[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Based upon the idiom, "too many cooks spoil the broth," although that idiom means something, whereas this is just an incomplete sentence.
</blockquote>

;took my idea for a fall

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Refers to ruining Chris's [[Love Quest]] plans.

<blockquote>''I am very mad and upset, because that JERK took my idea for a fall, just like that XXXXX at PVCC did!''<ref>[[CWC%27s Diary#2004]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this in his poem [[Saddest Heart in the World]] as well as a 2004 diary entry. Appears to be a mangling of "took me for a fool."</blockquote>

;triage

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' ménage à trois; a romantic relationship between three people.

<blockquote>''Magi-Chan Sonichu, Silvana Rosechu & Mewtwo / A Loving '''Triage'''''<ref>[[January 2018 Facebook posts‎‎#Mewtwo and Magi-Chan married]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A corruption or misspelling of "triad", possibly influenced by the ending of "ménage". "[[wikipedia:Triage|Triage]]" is a real word with a completely different meaning and unrelated etymology.
</blockquote>

;trollin' stupid

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Very stupid, in a manner pertaining to trolling.

<blockquote>''Because that's what you deserve, you God damn womanizing raping... '''trollin' stupid''' pickle suited... nigger!''<ref>[[Chris Drops the N-Bomb]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to have coined this phrase for his [[CWC "Boyfriend"|"Boyfriend"]] lyrics with "trollin'" serving as an intensifier along the lines of "fucking."
</blockquote>

;true and honest

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' something [[Honest content|honest]].

<blockquote>''I like sharing my honest feelings with other people because they're good feelings, most of the time. And more importantly they are '''true and honest''' feelings. SO THERE.''<ref>[[For Chris]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris first used the adjective with reference to his love for [[PandaHalo]], and the adjective was often used by [[Liquid Chris]].
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== U ==
|-
|

;ugly growth

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used by Chris to refer to his own penis negatively.

<blockquote>''"Did I not just tell you I am Seven Inches Long?! It is soo long, that I am literally able to stretch it Under my taint, and tuck it between my own ass cheeks, beyond my ass hole. With help, I can literally even shove the head of the '''Ugly Growth''' Up Mine!"''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Colin_Chat_2</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Un-clit|un-clit]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A piercing Chris got on his perrinium as an immitation clitoris.

<blockquote>''It is a short, steel straight piece with steel spheres, of which I refer to them as my '''un-clit'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Un-clit</ref></blockquote>

Origin: During his Tomgirl years, Chris was, and still is, very desperate to gain female body traits such as bigger breasts, wider hips, a fully functioning vagina, etc. In order to get a part of the work done, Chris got a piercing on his taint as a sort of pseudo-clitoris, showing more of Chris's limited knowledge of female anatomy. </blockquote>

;uncouth
[[File:Uncouth Twat.png|thumb|Most uncouth!]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' unlikeable, lacking good manners.

<blockquote>''And, by the way, among which, You give the Males a Most Terrible and Horrible Name in your behavior. Most '''Uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Colin_Chat_1</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''Trump is most Immature, '''Uncouth''', and Not Valid to be president.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Misc_E-mails#Anti-Pmurt</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I felt it appropriate to change my profile photo back to the filtered one for what happened in France the while back with due respect of the continuing of Trump's most drastic and '''uncouth''' actions in office.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/January_2017_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''You, sir, are '''Uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/2017_tweets#Trump.2C_you_mocked_the_mentally-challenged</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''All of you are nothing but immature, borish, '''uncouth''', and damned Neanderthals.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonic_Boom_Protests#Chris_Rages_On</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''Not Sexual Fantasy; Friendships, You '''Uncouth''' Cad. Hmpf!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2017_tweets#Unleashing_his_inner_Brit</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And as it Had been My fault on that #NationalGirlfriendTweet that started the whole mess, that was Why I chose whole-heartedly to Harass Me instead of Doopie or Anyone Else who was being harassed with the mis-content from Years Ago from me taken Out Of Context, Mind you, because Harassing Anyone at Anyone else’s Expense is Just Plain Wrong, Bullying, and '''Uncouth'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2017_tweets</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote> ''And it was ignored by you that Talulah Bankhead coined the term for Tabitha, you '''Uncouth''' Twat.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2017_tweets#Tabitha_addresses_CWC_flame_war</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I agree it is shameful of these people to have accounts just to haze at me and all others, Soo '''uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/NightStar2891_tweets#Twitter_spam_for_Tabitha</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I miss Jessica. You Trolls Scared Her Off by either Hacking or Reporting her Facebook. You '''Uncouth''' Cads!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jessica_Quinn</ref></blockquote>

Origin: As demonstrated, Chris uses this word way more than any 21st-century [[American]] would. It is often speculated that Chris picked up this word from an ''MLP'' episode, where Applebloom and Applejack are talking about what the word "uncouth" means.<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S-SrQ-Oz1k4</ref> Seeing how this conversation alone is somehow a staple in the Brony subculture, and how Chris is one of those Bronies who sees more [[Night_Star#Chris_spills_the_beans|meaning]] in the show than it actually possesses, Chris likely picked up this term due to how foreign and smart it sounded to him.

Chris is also notorious for his use of British English whenever he tries to make it seem he knows what he's talking about. So it is also fairly likely Chris may have adapted this word solely because he thinks British English words will make him sound smarter.
</blockquote>

;[[UNGA-WUNGA]]
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' A sexual chant from the [[Cherokian Clan]].
<blockquote>''There is no quote to directly cite the use of this CWC-ism. This CWC-ism was used in one of Chris' art pieces appropriately named "UNGA-WUNGA"''</blockquote>
Origin: Comes from a horrifying art piece Chris drew of himself banging [[Jackie]] against a tree while a group of Cherokians masturbate to their orgy.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Unga_Wunga_Time.jpg</ref> As for the questionably racist phrase itself, Chris simply stated that it was "just a random phrase I randomly picked for the natives to chant as they jerked off."<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jackie_E-mails_11</ref></blockquote>

;unto
<blockquote>1. ''(preposition)'' Archaic or poetic form of the word "to".

<blockquote>''Now that it has been made fully clear to me, I am now able to devote myself fully '''unto''' you, Julie.''<ref>[[BlueSpike Skype Logs 7]]</ref></blockquote>
<blockquote>''I am very devastated, due to my SHATTERED HEART that [[Mary Lee Walsh|XXXXX]] caused '''unto''' me!''</blockquote>

Origin: Another one of Chris's autistic ways of sounding smart, possibly in imitation of the Bible. (c.f. ''[[Chris and hypocrisy|Do unto others...]]''). Chris uses this form more frequently than most English speakers of the 21st century should, even when it sounds unwieldy.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== V ==
|-
|
;vaginatables

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' female genitalia

<blockquote>''There is no quote to cite the use of this CWC-ism. Chris used this CWC-ism in an e-mail address "ILuvVaginatables@aol.com".''</blockquote>

Origin: A strange hybrid of the words "vagina" and "vegetables", purely for Random-Access Humor.</blockquote>

;vege-marmite

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Vegemite

<blockquote>''Certainly not a '''vege-marmite''' sanwich. Lol''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-372</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A retarded pun made by Chris to state his distaste for veggie marmite. Coincidentally, vegemite is essentially marmite, yeast extract from brewing beer turned into a pungent, salty paste, with vegetables and spices added in.<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vegemite</ref></blockquote>

;vestite

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A transvestite person.

<blockquote>''"That is the difference between Trans Gender and '''Vestites'''; ID as the other sex, and dressing like it, respectively"''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-335#post-2635076]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In the above post, Chris intended to write the words "transgender" and "transvestite" in the same sentence without duplicating the trans suffix. He did so by adding a space between the prefix and the respective endings. It is worth mentioning that "Vestite" is a word in Latin, and simply refers to being clothed, without any connotations regarding cross-dressing.</blockquote>

;[[Virgin with Rage|virgin with rage]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An individual who is sexually frustrated

<blockquote>''Tell me why
I'm stuck as a '''virgin with rage'''!
Tell me why
I so need a cute girl my age!
Tell me why
I never wanna hear you say,
"I have a boyfriend!"''<ref>[[So Need a Cute Girl]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The idea of being a virgin and not having a sweetheart was something that greatly upsetted Chris. He would throw tantrums after losing a potential sweetheart, and thus missing out on an opportunity to lose his virginity.</blockquote>

;[[Virginia is for virgins]]

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase that pushes the idea that the citizens of Virginia won't allow Chris to get a girlfriend solely due to his autism.

<blockquote>"'''VIRGINIA IS FOR VIRGINS''', NOT LOVERS!"<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days
</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An intentional butchering of the phrase "Virginia is for Lovers". His belief that the state of Virginia is behind some kind of conspiracy to prevent him from finding true love has started since attending [[PVCC]]. While there, Chris has gotten himself putting up Attraction Signs, loitering with said signs on campus, and even creating a [[Sonichu's News Dash|newsletter series]] in order to attract potential sweethearts. Seeing how all of this violated the school's rules and policies, he was sent directly to the [[Mary Lee Walsh|Dean]] in order for her to straighten him out.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Virginia_is_for_Virgins#Origins</ref> Of course, Chris took this to be another instance of him being discriminated, solely for being autistic. This, coupled with the fact that he's already failed on several occasions to actually get to date any of his his female friends in high school, reinforced this belief. </blockquote>

;VOTES FOR WOMEN!
[[Image:Ss03.jpg|thumb|Mrs. Banks, wearing the "Votes for Women" sash that Chris so blatantly misinterpreted.]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase shouted in protest of pictures depicting women with penises.

<blockquote>'''''VOTES FOR WOMEN''', STEP IN TIME! VOTES FOR WOMEN, STEP IN TIME! NEVER NEED A REASON, NEVER NEED A RHYME, VOTES FOR WOMEN, STEP IN TIME!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic8P52.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from a sash Mrs. Banks, a character from [[Mary Poppins]], had worn. Chris clearly took this banner to simply refer to any kind of mistreatment towards women, rather than the fairly obvious implication that she's actually fighting for the right to vote.</blockquote>

<blockquote>''See Also'': [[CWC-isms#W|Women's Rights]]
</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== W ==
|-
|

;Walter Grisby
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A man's name often employed in acts of random-access humor.

<blockquote>''"Is this '''Walter Grisby'''? Who threw a frisbee? Well you know what? DAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!"''<ref>[[Random-access humor]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' The retconned name of the character formerly known as [[Wes Iseli]].

Origin: Unknown; thought by some to be a reference to the Cartoon Network show ''Ed, Edd n Eddy''. A character in the PC game ''The Sims 3'' goes by the name of Walter Grisby, but the game's release post-dates Chris's first uses of the term by some years.
</blockquote>

; Warroir of Love
[[Image:WarriorOfLove.jpg|thumb|300px|History's greatest warroirs.]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' an advocate for spreading love and peace.

<blockquote>''"People! You do not understand! By Not blocking the Trolls, you are Promoting Hatred; They don't always side with Love. I Am '''Warroir of Love'''."''<ref>[[https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/902236285389111297]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Misspelling of the word "warrior". Chris considers himself a "warrior of love" because he believes that he is the [[Chris and kindness|voice of kindness]]. Most likely derived from the derogatory term "Social Justice Warrior", a term used for individuals who advocate for social justice and equality.
</blockquote>

; water on the rocks
[[File:Water and Dasani.jpeg|thumb|200px|Literally a drink on the rocks.]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' water poured over Chris's [[magic stones]] for drinking.

<blockquote>''#DrinkWater; Filtered or Bottled, preferred; Quartz, Rose Quartz, or Amethyst optional to enjoy it '''on the rocks''' (held in place with aluminum wire).''<ref>[[March 2020 social media posts#watch anime to kill coronavirus]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''staying hydrated with more than 101.4 ounces of filtered '''water on the rocks''' within a #Glacce bottle''<ref>[[January 2021 social media posts#GFuel and meditation]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In accordance with his [[Magical thinking|New Age]] beliefs, Chris purchased a Glacce water bottle for $80+, which features a crystal display set inside. He later placed one of his [[magic stones]] into it, crudely held in by aluminum wire, and refers to drinking from the bottle as "water on the rocks."
</blockquote>

;well-breasted
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Having large breasts.

<blockquote>''And her image dawned upon me in my imagination, starting out as the '''well-breasted''' pink electric-hedgehog (Pok'emon) with the long Raichu-like tail, I drew her outfit onto her in red and Battery-Charged Blue.''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Rosechu|CWCipedia article on Rosechu}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Confusion between "well-endowed" and "large-breasted".

</blockquote>

;witching hours
<blockquote> 1. ''(noun)'' The time between midnight and 4 AM that Chris cannot fall asleep during.

<blockquote>'' I know that I'm gonna be more effective with the '''witching hours''' during the night once again, whether I'm asleep or not, okay.<ref>[[Animated Everfree Message]]</ref>
</blockquote>
Origin: May have been picked up from Chris's increasing interest in the [[Magical thinking|occult]]. Generally, the phrase refers to the midnight hours, with the term being inspired by the ancient belief that supernatural events, like witches, demons, and ghosts, are at their most powerful at midnight. Chris adopted the phrase in reference to his [[Biological clock|unusual sleep schedule]].

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#B|biological clock]]
</blockquote>

;Woahly
<blockquote> 1. ''(interjection)'' Expression indicating surprise.
<blockquote>'' Who is it Rosey? The Stew's almost ready and I... '''Woahly'''..!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Sonichu15-2019draft-p11.png</ref>
</blockquote>
Origin: Portmanteau of "woah" and "holy... (as in the beginning of saying holy shit)," found in [[Sonichu 15]].
</blockquote>

;woman up
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' The female equivalent of manning up.

<blockquote>''Fellow autistic people! I encourage you to man and '''woman up''' [Subtitle: "It is Socializing In Real Life or Dust!"] respectively! Go out into the real world, and make real friends with full, great quality friendships! Do it now!''</blockquote>

Origin: Used in the second part of Chris’s Autism Tutorial, where he insultingly attempts to rally up all autistic people (regardless of their functionality) to form proper friendships, all while missing the point of “manning up”.
</blockquote>

;[[Women's rights]] (or Women's Lib)
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' Any kind of behavior towards women that does not involve abusing them physically or mentally.

<blockquote>''Christian Weston Chandler, A Man For The Women, For the '''Women's Rights''', For the Women's Justice, For the Women's Peace.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Other_documents</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' The right for women to not be depicted with a [[CWC-isms#P|pickle]].

<blockquote>''FOR OUR '''RIGHTS AS WOMEN''' AMONG ALL PEOPLE, I WILL OVERPOWER THOSE SLANDEROUS JERKS!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic8P58.jpg</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(noun)'' The act of women protesting by stripping down naked.

<blockquote>''Well, once we get our centerfolds shot and uploaded, hopefully those bastards will see and admire our beautiful lights.''</blockquote>

<blockquote>''Yeah, and if nothing else, we can still have a lot of fun trying.''</blockquote>

<blockquote>''With our lord's support in our peaceful protest, we can win this fight.''</blockquote>

<blockquote>''Victory for '''Women's Lib'''''.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic8P51.jpg</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: Chris's understanding of sexism is botched up beyond belief. His zeal towards the rights of women is believed to have originated from watching the 1964 Disney film, Mary Poppins. He was particularly influenced by Mrs. Banks, who has expressed distaste for unequal treatment for women in 1910 London. As to be expected, Chris missed the point of this part of her character, and instead used this in order to justify his treatment towards the women he meets. Chris also believed that the term "sexism" only applies to forms of violence against women, and not necessarily representing in a condescending manner.

</blockquote>

;wooden nickel
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Acoustic guitar.

<blockquote>''I got the idea of the challenge from him COPYING me playing Boston's "More Than A Feeling" on Guitar Hero on his old '''Wooden Nickel'''; if he wants to copy on Guitar, he may as well be challenged in a Sing-Off.''<ref>[[Katie Bay E-mails 3]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In real life, a wooden nickel is a now defunct form of currency used during the Great Depression. His use probably refers to the phrase "don't take any wooden nickels" - that is, he is calling the acoustic guitar a semi-worthless imitation of his Guitar Hero controller.
</blockquote>

;worse
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' Severely; extremely, in an adverse manner

<blockquote>''IMHO, having Seinor Citizens for Parents throughout your whole life is no picnic; they are '''WORSE''' Overprotective.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 6]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;worst mud, muck and bodily fluids

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Mud, among [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|other disgusting things]].

<blockquote>''The DAMN Trolling-Stupids have manipulated me; smeared my once good name through the worst mud, muck, and bodily fluids.''<ref>June 2012 Facebook posts#Damn Michael Snyder</ref></blockquote>

Origin: First used by Chris in a June 2012 Facebook post ranting about that damn [[Michael Snyder]]. Refers to having his good name or reputation dragged through the mud, with "bodily fluids" added in an attempt to garner sympathy.
</blockquote>

|-
|
;wrath
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Great [[Chris and anger|anger]] or rage. Considered one of the [[Chris and religion|Seven Deadly Sins]].

<blockquote>''Apparently, my, uh, heed of warning towards Vivian has gone unheard or otherwise SHE DID NOT REALIZE THE FURY OF MY '''WRATH'''''<ref>[[Sign Destruction Video]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Strength sufficient to lift an office chair.

<blockquote>''I HAAAVE THE POWEEERRRR!!! FEEL MY '''WRATH'''!!''<ref>[[Power]]</ref></blockquote>
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

==X==
|-
|
;X2-checking
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' Double Checking
<blockquote>''Just '''X2-checking''' if you got the drawing I left you.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-11-2017-chris-spotted-at-bronycon.33187/page-35#post-2511049]]</ref></blockquote>
Origin: Comes from x2 meaning times two, which means double to Chris.</blockquote>

;XXX-tended
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Sexually explicit
<blockquote>''ESPECIALLY WITH ALL OF THE TRUTH BOMBS AND ROSEY ROSECHU's POST-INTERSEX-TO-FEMALE TRANSITION AND OPERATION NUDES IN THE '''XXX-TENDED''' CONTROVERSIAL VERSION OF MY BOOK NUMBER EIGHT IN 2008!''<ref>[[Jail_Letter - 20 October 2021#22 October]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>
;XXXXX
<blockquote>1. ''(noun, censorship)'' censorship of the word "bitch"
<blockquote>''Mary Lee Walsh made it illegal to distribute the News Dash; I AM VERY ANGRY AT THAT '''XXXXX'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC%27s_Diary</ref></blockquote>
Origin: Chris's only instance of this peculiar censorship is in his [[diary]]. In it, Chris repeatedly refers to [[Mary Lee Walsh]] as an "XXXXX", clearly as a censorship of the word "bitch". Why Chris chose to replace all of the letters in the word with the capital letter "X", instead of using asterisks remains a mystery.</blockquote>

|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Y ==

</blockquote>
|-
|
;y'all should know me by now
|-
|<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' An introduction to complete strangers.

<blockquote>'''''Y'all should know me by now''', but if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of Sonichu, the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon, back on March 17th, 2000.''<ref name=csm/></blockquote>
Origin: His second message on YouTube, addressed to the ED trolls. He would use it several more times after this, possibly making this into his tagline. The introduction is made under the assumption that Chris is [[Chris and his Ego|already well-known]]. May have been partially derived from ''[[The Adventures of The American Rabbit]]'', where a character similarly begins a speech by saying, "You all know me."
</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;yea and merrily
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used to open videos where Chris is feeling [[Messiah complex|messianic]].

<blockquote>'''''Yea and merrily''' to everyone. Welcome to this.''<ref>[[Jesus Christ Chan Sonichu Prime Resurrected and Returned]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''Hey everybody! '''Yea and merrily'''.''<ref>[[Simple Existential Q&A]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A stupid play on "yea, verily", an antiquated phrase meaning "yes, truly", often assumed to have been said by Jesus in the {{w|King James Version}} of the Bible. Although the word "verily" is often used by Jesus in the King James Version, the phrase "yea, verily" never actually appears anywhere in the King James Bible. It does, however, appear in the {{w|Book of Mormon}}.
</blockquote>

;young at heart

<blockquote>1. ''(noun, attributive)'' An individual with childlike characteristics; a childish person.

<blockquote>''Hello Nintendo! Welcome to my Animal Crossing for Nintendo GameCube. I am your host. My name is Christian Weston Chandler. I live in Ruckersville, Virginia and I is [sic] 21 years old and I play because I am '''young at heart'''. So anyway we are going to take a tour of my ci-ty...in Animal Crossing.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Animal_Crossing_Documentary</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I am '''Young at Heart'''; a concept I have kept within myself since childhood.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-27-chris-wants-everyone-to-be-a-manchild-like-him.33726/]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''We, the '''Young at heart''' stand alongside our Liked and Cared others.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-27-chris-wants-everyone-to-be-a-manchild-like-him.33726/]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris more often than not advertises his childish nature as him being "young at heart", as if this was a more positive quality of himself, even going as far as using this as a reason for girls to fall in love with him in his attraction signs <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Attraction_Sign</ref>. This is because Chris can't tell the difference between being a child at heart, and being childish. In his mind, people who are considered "childish" actually lead a happier and more exciting life, since he believes that childlike people are more willing to show off their [[kindness]] and are generally more eccentric. In reality, adults who are "young at heart" generally have a somewhat innocent outlook of life and are generally interested in things considered suitable for children, yet understand their responsibilities as adults, something which Chris has failed to do since graduating [[High School]].
</blockquote>
|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Z ==
|-
|

;zap to the extreme
[[Image:ZapToTheExtreme.png|thumb|200px]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Go out and be brave.

<blockquote>''Go! Sonichu! Go out and '''zap to the extreme'''!''<ref>[[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote> ''Now everyone stay green and go out and '''zap to the extr-r-r-r-r-eme'''. Have a lovely day.''<ref>[[A New, Fun Trick]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: This phrase is first used on the cover of [[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]], where Chris's self-insert tells Sonichu to "zap to the extreme" as if Chris and Sonichu were in a bona fide [[Pokémon]] tournament. Chris would then end up using this phrase time and again, usually completely out of context of its original meaning.
</blockquote>

;zapbud
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A fictitious flower found in the ''Sonichu'' canon; Rosechu's favorite flower.

<blockquote>''Oh, Rosechu, you are as beautiful as a rose, though a '''Zapbud''' is the flower that heals your woes.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_Ode_to_Rosechu</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Essentially the result of Chris attempting to create a mythology around his ''Sonichu'' comics, Chris created some of his own flora as well. Because of how "zapping" was a very common theme in the earlier issues of ''Sonichu'', Chris thought about naming his flora after this one theme. The term has ironically become popular with trolls and enablers, where they name made-up characters and places after it.</blockquote>

<blockquote>2. ''(noun)'' a [[CWC-isms#S|sweetheart]].

<blockquote>''Yes, my blossoming '''zapbud'''. That's why we are here.''<ref>[[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In this context, the term is used the same way a female lover may be compared to a flower. This was clearly an attempt to make the flora have a greater significance by making it sound like something beautiful.
</blockquote>

;zombie-like

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' To be riddled with dementia.

<blockquote>''Also, Barb is literally a Zombie-Like Living Body with little remaining of Barbara (her Soul) within her anymore; that living body is Running on Fumes at this point. She CAN NOT Drive anymore, regardless of Van loss; she has the fridgid mental activity and physical ability like a scared deer in headlights nearly ALL the time since even before June, 2021.<ref>[[Jail Letter - 29 July 2022]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in a [[Jail Letter - 29 July 2022|Jail Letter]] where Chris seems to imply that during his affair with his mother, she might have been declining mentally.
</blockquote>

|}

==References==

<references/>

==Navigation==

{{CWC-isms}}
{{Lists}}
[[Category:CWC-isms]]

CWC-isms

2025-06-13T05:32:41Z

Anemichu: /* D */

<center>{{Honest}}</center>

{{Protip|Please refrain from using CWC-isms casually when writing articles, as this may make them difficult for newcomers to decipher.}}
One of [[Chris]]'s most notorious features is his strange '''vocabulary''', consisting of a mix of fairly standard words, slang, jargon, and various personal coinages.

Some of these coinages originate from a degree of prudery, likely inherited from his older parents and maintained by his childlike nature. Like many children who don't feel comfortable referring to [[Honest Content|adult concepts]] directly, Chris often resorts to creating cutesy euphemisms for a lot of words that anyone else his age would generally use with little reservation, which is common with autistic people. While some of them are understandable — after all, nobody would really relish discussing their [[Butt garments|diapers]] — others, such as "[[tobacky]]" instead of "tobacco", only serve to turn an otherwise normal sentence into an advertisement for Chris's childish nature.

Others are attempts to be clever that fail miserably, for example, he refers to [[semen]] as "[[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009|navy]]", because semen sounds like sea men, [[Random-access humor|get it?]] Still others come from Chris's love of manipulating words, especially backwards spellings, {{w|portmanteau}} blends, “verbing” nouns, or liberal use of suffixes like “- ish” or “-er”. Combine this with the idiosyncratic speech patterns that are common among [[autism|autistics]] (likely since standard language may seem inefficient to explain their thought processes), and you get his so-called '''CWC-isms'''.

CWC-isms may be combinations or butchered versions of words or phrases that already exist, entirely new words, commonplace words that he uses repeatedly in a peculiar or obsessive way, or entirely new phrases that Chris often has to explain afterwards because nobody knows what he's talking about.

==Primary categories of CWC-isms==
Nearly all CWC-isms belong to one of the four following classes:
# '''CWC-neologism''' - a ''new'' word or phrase, unknown until ''created by Chris''. Example: ''[[CWC-isms#L|Lovehogs]]'', a portmanteau of "love" and "hedgehogs".
# '''CWC-homonym''' - an ''existing'' word or phrase, to which Chris has given a ''different meaning''. These may be euphemisms, designed to avoid naming (to Chris) offensive things, or else due to Chris confusing an elevated word's meaning. Example: ''[[Duck]]'', for Chris's penis; ''[[CWC-isms#T|telekinesis]]'', used erroneously in place of ''telepathy''.
# '''CWC-archaism''' - an ''obscure'' word or phrase, known in English but seldom used by contemporary Virginians, which Chris has learned somewhere and has ''become characteristic'' for Chris's way of speaking/writing. Example: ''[[CWC-isms#U|Uncouth]]'', a word now rarely used outside the context of formal etiquette, which Chris used to tell people how much of a jerk he perceive they're being to him.
# '''CWC-misspelling''' - only the ''most notable'' of Chris's ''misspellings'', including deliberate re-arrangements: those which are characteristic for Chris's way of writing. Example: ''[[Geinus]]'', what he deems himself to be; ''[[Pmurt]]'' for Donald Trump, 45th and 47th president of the United States. Chris's sporadic, inconsistent use of some [[Catherine|British spellings]] while otherwise using American English can also be considered under this category.



__NOTOC__

<div style="position:fixed; bottom:0; center:0">{{Alphabet ToC}}</div>

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

==#==
|-
|

;12-9
[[Image:Sonichu 12-9 Cover.jpg|The cover for Sonichu #12-9|thumb|200px]]

<blockquote>
1. ''(numeral)'' A placeholder for the number thirteen.

<blockquote> ''There are no quotes that cite the use of this CWC-ism directly. Chris however used it in lists that exceed 12 items.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/1006915844016869377</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris has shown on a few occasions to dislike the number 13, due to him deeming it an unlucky number. This phenomenon, referred to as [[wikipedia:Triskaidekaphobia|triskaidekaphobia]], is already a popular superstition in American culture, and this is likely where Chris picked it up. His fear of the number has led to some bizarre effects, particularly in his numbering. A famous example of this unusual numbering shtick is in the 13th issue of his Sonichu comics, which he numbered as "Issue #12-9", in which he used an em-dash in the place of a decimal place. The 12-9 itself is meant to represent a value of "almost 13".</blockquote>

;15 minutes
[[File:15 minutes.jpg|thumb|200px|"It takes me fifteen f-yay minutes"]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' [[Masturbation]], the amount of time it takes for Chris.

<blockquote> ''Masturbation takes '''Fifteen LONG, Tiring and Annoying Minutes'''''<ref name=15min>[[Masturbation discussions]]</ref></blockquote>
<blockquote> ''Self-masturbation is really arduous and annoying. Another '''15 minutes''' down the drain.''<ref name=15min></ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris coined this phrase in 2021, using it in chats with the [[Watchmen]] and in the [[Workaholics Anonymous comic]].</blockquote>

;[[4-cent_garbage.com|4-Cent Garbage]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' The headquarters of [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] and [[4-Chan]] trolls in ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]''.

<blockquote> ''You will recognize her [?] as your sweetheart because from a fav- from a favor on her half, your internal clock will be restored fully, your enemies of '''4-cent-garbage''' will be vanquished, so you both will live together in peace. Live freely.''<ref>[[Sonichu 9 Official Videobook]]</ref></blockquote>
Origin: Since ED and 4chan were partly responsible for Megan's breakup with him, Chris decided to get payback on the both of them by combining the both of them into an evil corporation in Sonichu, dubbing it "4-cent Garbage".</blockquote>

;7-incher
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' A penis which measures seven-inches in length.

<blockquote> ''Good thing we stopped for a pack of condoms; it's too bad the regular-size ones break easily on my '''7-incher'''.''</blockquote>

Origin: According to Chris, his penis is about 7 inches, which he actually believes is the average length of a penis of an adult male <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_20#Oral_doesn.27t_count</ref>. Chris has made all kinds of weird euphemisms for just his penis alone such as this one, "ugly growth", and "duck".</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

==A==
|-
|
;abreast
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' full of; filled with.

<blockquote>''It was not until after saving the city from the forces of Count Graduon and his minions, that she realized her form's new assets. And she was '''abreast''' with delight and glee when she found not the Male Part, but a Vagina!''<ref>[[May 2015 Facebook posts]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''In fact, while I am fairly educated about Tribadism and '''abreast''' with theories, I would appreciate some experience with a lesbian or two who knows what she likes to enlighten me better, including on sensual massage and all that.''<ref>[[May_2015_Facebook_posts]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris uses this word when discussing feminine anatomy and lesbian sex, evidently because it includes the word "breast". He fails to realize that "abreast" actually means "adjacent" or "across".<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/abreast</ref> A possible confusion with the word "abound" or "abundant".</blockquote>

;Adult Swim
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' pornographic or otherwise "NSFW"; containing [[Honest Content|adult content]].

<blockquote>''She still has a great drawing style, even for the '''Adult Swim''' section."<ref>[[CWCSonichu-NightStar2891 DMs]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Refers to the Cartoon Network block ''[[Adult Swim]]''. Chris seemed to only consider the "Adult" part of this block's name, and therefore assumed he could use this phrase to describe anything that's "adult" to him. Note that the Cartoon Network block does not feature pornographic content.

</blockquote>

;adulterous
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' Of an [[Christian Weston Chandler's Adult Chronicles|adult]] and mature nature

<blockquote>''Originally it was supposed to be like, you know, like ages 7 and up, but then I end up going to the content, uh, it could be considered, be like, be like definitely be considered '''adulterous'''.''<ref>[[Lars Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: usually used to describe people who [[Ivy|cheat]] on their [[Blanca Weiss|partners]] (i.e. guilty of adultery), Chris only notices the "adult" component of the word.

2. ''(adjective)'' Insult of unclear nature
<blockquote>''Heeeeey, folks! It's me, [[Clyde Cash]]. I am the ruler of the internet and the internet trolls. I am an '''adulterous''' foe, a bastard and a self-righteous idiot who spends his time wallowing and trolling the one Christian Weston Chandler, and making up a whole bunch of dadgum rumors all over the internet!''<ref>[[100 2267]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris simply throws out the insult without a clear understanding of the word. Possibly referring to Clyde taking [[PandaHalo]] from Chris, though this is more aptly described as cuckoldry than adultery. Perhaps influenced by the verb ''adulterate''.

</blockquote>

;among which
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' Among other things. Et cetera. Also. Additionally

<blockquote>'''''Among which''' I can project myself to (the Ninja Turtles universe)''<ref>[[Dankula]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: [[Autism|Uncertain]]. Chris adopted this phrase and began using it heavily in a number of different contexts through-out 2018. Perhaps the clearest example of chris's over-use of "among which" is the [[Dankula|Count Dankula interview]], where Chris uses the phrase no less than ten times.

</blockquote>

;an' anurr thing
<blockquote>
1. ''(Phrase, transitionary)'' Signifies that Chris wishes to make another point about a subject he is discussing, and that he wishes he were Peter Falk.

<blockquote>''An' anurr thing...CHRIS. Your for real- your real name, as I have been told by Kacey, is only Chris Chandler! No "-tian," no "-topher," just Chris! So, admit that. '''An' anurr thing''', I NAME is NOT IAN! BRANDON!!! SOMETHING!!!!!''<ref>[[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: a corruption of "and another thing". Used constantly when Chris is angry.

</blockquote>
;[[Anaxis bird]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' Signifies that [[Anaxis]] was meant to be a messenger for the information that Chris requested he put in ''A Medium's Guidance''.

<blockquote>
''Perhaps you all may have heard how I came onto this from an '''Anaxis bird'''.''<ref>[[User:Anaxis/Watchmen Source Leaks#"Anaxis Bird"]]</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: A mangling of the phrase "a little birdie told me", indicating that an anonymous source gave someone a piece of secret information. Because of Chris's misuse of the phrase, the other Watchmen present had come to believe that Anaxis was influencing Chris to write both the [[Affirmations List]] and the [[Lovers Attributes List]].</blockquote>

;[[Anchuent Prophecy|anchuent]]
[[Image:Anch.PNG|right|thumb|Chris and Sonichu amazed by the Anchuent Prophecy]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' Describes anything that is archaic in the ''Sonichu'' canon.

<blockquote>
''Well, what's this? I'm havin' an upgrade? Huh! Huh! My- my powers are given me the ability to fly with my wings attached to my head! It's like a w- it's like an add-on! That's optional! Huh! Must have been done by '''Anchuent''' Powers, so awesome I can fly now! Huh!''<ref>[[Sonichu_3_Official_Videobook]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Initially, "anchuent" was taken to be a misspelling of the word "ancient" given Chris's [[Chris and English|poor grasp of the English language]]. Over time, however, it was revealed that "anchuent" was meant to be a portmanteau of the words "ancient" and "Sonichu", adding the "chu" part of "Sonichu" into the word "ancient".<ref>[[Sonichu_3_Official_Videobook]]</ref> </blockquote>

;and shit
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' And additional items.

<blockquote>''I don't want to believe in labels at all but I mean obviously, tale- the incest fanfics have come true '''and shit'''.''<ref>[[Incest call]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''But, yeah, I did not verbally argue as much growing up, and it took facing the even Toughter Moments since 2000 '''and shit''' for me to actually formulate and speak better self-defenses with what is Truth''<ref>[[Jail Letter - 20 October 2021#22 October]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A more profane variant of "and such" (see below). Chris often uses the phrase in unfitting contexts. He may have picked it up from [[Lars]]'s constant usage of the phrase during the 2010 [[Lars Call]].
</blockquote>

;and such
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' And additional items; to add to a list.

<blockquote>''At least to give you all, my patient, loyal Fans and Trolls, something to quell your pallets until Official Merchandise is sold in Official Stores such as Toys 'R' Us, GameStop, Best Buy, Wal-Mart, etcetera '''and such'''.''<ref>[[CWC Blog|Cwcipedia captain's log, 25 November 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris understands the term's meaning, but uses it superfluously.
</blockquote>

;anthropological
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' human-like, anthropomorphic.

<blockquote>''In dressing myself for the burial work, I saw Snoopy had merged with his '''anthropological''' self-counterpart on the C-197 half of the veil.''<ref>[[July 2021 social media posts#Eulogy for Snoopy]]</ref></blockquote>
</blockquote>

;artery

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' art.

<blockquote>''Good evening, but between this and the, uh, oh, and the other clips I would like to present you, uh, a few examples of hand '''artery'''.''<ref>[[CWC - Hand Drawn Original]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Not to be confused with the term for blood vessels. Chris doesn't seem to realize "art" is already a noun and doesn't need the suffix, and that "artistry" also exists.
</blockquote>

;as such

<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' In the manner previously described.

<blockquote>''They just hated me because they don't, they did not understand people with autism. And so they tortured me '''as such'''.''<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris overuses this phrase to the point of self-parody. He's either tacking it on to fill space when he can't think of the next thing to say, or he's peppering it into his language in a feeble attempt to sound intelligent.
</blockquote>

;ass burgers

<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' [[Asperger's Syndrome]]

<blockquote> ''There are no quotes that cite the use of this CWC-ism directly, as Chris instead alludes to it as "a bad cut of cow meat".</blockquote>

Origin: Since the CWCipedia Saga, Chris has been noted for disliking Asperger's Syndrome, viewing it as something that makes autistic people look bad due to the term vaguely sounding like "ass burgers". Chris has alternatively suggested the term can also sound like "something that can be picked nasally", aka "ass boogers".
</blockquote>

;ass manager
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Either a misspelling or a derogatory term for "assistant manager," based on the abbreviation "ass. manager."

<blockquote>''I did not learn until much later that the spritz had done a lot worse than I had imagined it would, as well as learning that they were the so-called "Manager" and "Ass Manager" of that particular store.''<ref>[[December 2014 Facebook Posts#Shit, Meet Fan]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris has only used this term once, when referring to the [[Yellow-Shirted Foe]]. It's unclear if this was a misspelling or [[Manajerk|yet]] [[Jerkop|another]] childish insult based on someone's job title.</blockquote>

;[[Attraction Location|attraction location]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any place Chris may sit to gain the attention of any passing women, only to get promptly kicked out afterward.

<blockquote>''Also, as of early November, I was reemitted into the Fashion Square Shopping Center, and since Mid-December, I totally left the UVA as an '''Attraction Location'''.''<ref>[[Story_of_My_Current_Days]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, having a very difficult socializing with women, thought that sitting around in a certain place and soliciting himself would be a better alternative. Therefore, it would make sense to him to sit in a location with many people in order to gain the attention of several women.</blockquote>

;attraction time

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The time that is spent at an attraction location

<blockquote>''Then, on my next visit to the mall, I felt seriously depressed about what had happened the other day; it killed my '''attraction time'''''.<ref>[[Story_of_My_Current_Days]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;audio-sonic feeling

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the arousing feeling caused by getting hit by sound waves

<blockquote>''Here is a most '''audio-sonic feeling'''. While at the club last night, the [[Chris and music|music]] was loud, maybe reverberating or echoing. The music and beats literally shook up my rack! I actually Felt the music playing and reverbing within my breasts, almost like my breasts had become a pair of speakers. It Felt Amazing and Arousing!''<ref>https://www.facebook.com/cwcville/photos/a.447204945915.244245.167832525915/10152771303590916/?type=3&theater</ref></blockquote>

Origin: As shown in the quote above, Chris believed that he was sexually aroused when sound waves hit him. In actuality, sound, a vibration,<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sound</ref> creates pressure. The louder the sound, the more pressure gets created from the wave. Therefore, very loud music should be able to hit Chris given that he's a [[obesity|huge target]], creating that "arousing" feeling, which is actually an alternation between high and low pressures.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== B ==
|-
|

;B-dog
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Derogatory epithet for women.

<blockquote>''Then that [[Mary Lee Walsh|'''B-Dog''']] ripped up my notes and all, dragged me to her quarters and talked down to me very RUDELY AND HOARSELY.''<ref>[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Childish censorship of the word "bitch"; bitch also meaning "female dog". [[Bubbles Rosechu]] is implied to say this in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], when she shouts "BEEE..!!!" at [[Silvana]].<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_8/Page_95|Issue 8 Pages 94-95}}</ref>
</blockquote>

;bally
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' round; having the texture of a perfectly round ball.

<blockquote>''I've always given her a "'''Bally'''-Scratch" where I stroke her head with all five fingers like as if I was gently squeezing a rubber ball.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_emails_2004-2006</ref></blockquote>

Origin: If one didn't know Chris was referring to his dog, Patti, and that he gives her a "Bally-scratch" on the head, one might conclude that he's fondling someone's genitals. Chris, [[CWC-isms#N|naive]] to how suggestive this sounds, gave this special kind of petting the name "Bally-scratching" because of how stroking her head felt like he was squeezing a rubber ball.</blockquote>

;Be Woman
<blockquote>1. ''(verb phrase)'' Be '''a''' woman.

<blockquote>''I am a Lesbian Transwoman; I am not confused or mentally ill about that; '''I Am Woman.'''''<ref>[[2017_tweets#Proud_to_be_a_feminist]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''How Dare You Insult and be so Inconsiderate of Her like that? '''She Is Woman'''; she would Never Revert Back.''<ref>[[NightStar2891_tweets#She_is_woman]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used regularly when Chris asserts his [[Tomgirl|transgender identity]], notable for the consistent lack of a proper article and capitalization of each word in the phrase. Originally only attested in the first person ("I Am Woman"), a post on Chris's [[Miss Night Star]] Twitter sockpuppet account uses the third person ("She Is Woman"). Technically first appears in [[Sonichu 8]] when [[The Incredible Lioness]] attacks [[Jason Kendrick Howell]], as the somewhat cliché musical reference [[wikipedia:I Am Woman|"I am woman, hear me roar!"]], which may have inspired Chris's broader use of the phrase. This could be a reference to the Bhagavad Gita or Oppenheimer ("Now I am become death, destroyer of worlds.") [[honor roll|but this is unlikely]].
</blockquote>



;[[Biological clock|biological clock]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[Wikipedia:Circadian Rhythm|circadian rhythm]]

<blockquote>'''I have a lot of stored caffeene [sic] in my energy supply, and not only kept me on my toes, but has also messed up my fucking '''biological clock''' as well.''<ref>[[Biological clock]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Although technically not used incorrectly in this context, the phrase "biological clock" is used exclusively for women in their child-bearing years. Possibly a confusion with "internal clock".
</blockquote>

;blangry
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' [[Chris and anger|Angry]].

<blockquote>''Oh, and how 'bout this?! I get '''BLANGRY'''! ''<ref>[[Chris Calls Clyde Out]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Given Chris's belief that he has [[Chris and English|mastered the English language]] and his [[speech impediment]], it's likely he meant to say angry.
</blockquote>

;blue-printed
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Skilled in engineering.

<blockquote>''I like many others, was born a foal; to a '''blue-printed''' Pegasus and a country tomboy earth mare.''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/attachments/screenshot_20171019-235945_01-png.299275/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris portrayed Bob's Pony Counterpart in [[Sonichu 12-9|''Sonichu'' #12-9]] as an engineer, just like the real [[Bob Chandler|Bob]]. Due to Chris's limited vocabulary, Chris knew very little words he could use to describe Bob's profession. Derived from the word "blueprints", the plans set for the design of a product. </blockquote>

;[[Boyfriend-free girl|boyfriend-free]]

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Single; particularly used on women.

<blockquote>''Ahh, well, it's been over a year and ten months now since I started my sweetheart-search; I still haven't found a '''boyfriend-free'''-caring-smoke-free-non-alcoholic-white-girl-near-my-age to build a relationship with from the ground up.''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris’s mission in life used to be to obtain a girlfriend and have sex. However, every chance he thinks he gets, they already have a boyfriend. This has made Chris “fear” girls who already have boyfriends.</blockquote>

;Buddha belly
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Excess fat that gives a person a [[obesity|very round appearance]].

<blockquote>''Okay, well, I admit I do have a '''Buddha belly''', but I am not lazy, I do get out and about, I exercise, I jog and work out, and I eat healthy.''<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: "[[Wikipedia:Buddha|Buddha]]" is a title given to several legendary figures in [[Wikipedia:Buddhism|Buddhism]]. In this case, Chris is making reference to [[wikipedia:Budai|Budai]], who is often known as "Fat Buddha". Chris presumably picked up the phrase from the ''[[Family Guy]]'' episode "To Love and Die in Dixie".
</blockquote>

;bugbears
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[Trolls]], [[weens]], and other Chris-related orbiters who make him miserable.

<blockquote>''Freaking CyberBullies!!!!!!! Real '''Bugbears''', they are!''<ref>[[Apologies to the liked Bronies and Pegasisters; PLEASE UNBLOCK ME ON TWITTER!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Although the term was originally defined in the 16th century as 'a cause of obsessive fear, anxiety, or irritation.', It was given a another definition centuries later to describe a race of hobgoblins made famous by [[Wikipedia:Bugbear (Dungeons & Dragons)|Dungeons & Dragons]]. It's widely believed that Chris picked up the term from [[My Little Pony]]: Friendship is Magic, which depicted these creatures as literal bear-insect hybrids that are first seen terrorizing the ponies.
</blockquote>

;buh bye bay nose
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' but if anybody knows.

<blockquote>''If I knew who you were, I'd give you a kick in da bawls. But I can't, because I don't know who or where you are. '''Buh bye bay nose''' the whereabouts of the... [[JERKS|jerk]]... and just happens to be nearby... or within the state? Give him a swick kick for me.''<ref>[[Christian's Update 13 September 2008]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A result of Chris’s [[speech impediment]]</blockquote>

</blockquote>
;but during the stone age...
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A rebuttal for something obvious being stated.

<blockquote>''You don’t have to tell me twice! '''But during the stone age...'''''<ref>[[Sonichu 2]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: According to the [[Sonichu 2 Official Videobook|Videobook for Sonichu #2]], the phrase originates from how you need to “tell cavemen twice” over anyone else.</blockquote>

;[[Butt garments|butt garment]]
[[Image:Ecp00065.jpg|thumb|Leaked footage of Chris in a butt garment]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' an adult diaper; typically one used to control Chris's [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|fecal incontenence]].

<blockquote>''The doctor corrected that they were liners; he never called them diapers. Neither did Chris- he called them “'''butt garments'''”.''</blockquote>

Origin: To avoid embarrassment from stating that he shits himself constantly, and uses diapers, Chris refers to his adult diapers as butt garments.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== C ==
|-
|

;C-Log
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' Captain's Log.

<blockquote>'''''C-Log''' February 4th, 2010. First off, I'm not dead, and I have a few announcements to make.''<ref>[[I am Alive]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: For quite some time, Chris has had the habit of abbreviating certain words or phrases that begin with "'''C'''", possibly for [[Chris and his Ego|his name also beginning with "'''C'''"]], as well as to put greater emphasis on the letter C in the words he abbreviates. Other examples of this kind of abbreviation include "C-Mas" and "C-Ville".
</blockquote>

;C-Mas
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' Christmas

<blockquote> ''The [[Christmas]] season is upon us, and with that comes the rush for the '''C-Mas''' Turkey, Tree (real or artificial), and of course, the presents. So, Sonichu and the News Dash have some helpful tips to give a better feel of the season to all.<ref>[[Sonichu's_News_Dash#A_Very_Special_Holiday_Chris-chan]]
</ref>''</blockquote>

Origin: See ''C-Log''.
</blockquote>

;C Ville (or C-Ville)
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' [[Charlottesville, VA]].

<blockquote>''Look, you're going to back in '''C-Ville''' tomorrow, I can meet you at the McDonalds at Forest Lakes, what time is good for our meeting?''<ref>[[Vanessa AIM Chat 3]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Generic term for any city whose name fits the pattern of beginning with "C" and ending with "ville," e.g., [[CWCville]], Charlottesville, etc.

<blockquote>''And when you diss Cwcville you disf- you diss every "'''C Ville'''" within these United States.''<ref>[[Do Not Dis C Ville]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: See ''C-Log''.
</blockquote>

;[[Captain's Log|Captain's Log]]
[[File:CWCtrek1.png|400px|right|thumb|The Autistic Generation]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' The classic opening for a vlog video Chris makes to adress the fanbase, which includes the date of production. Replaced in 2015 with "live from home once again".

<blockquote>'''''Captain's Log'''. Stardate: September... 24th, 2008.''<ref>[[Chris Chan Update 24 September 2008]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: One may come to the conclusion that Chris picked up this phrase from Star Trek, however, Chris is neither a fan of the Star Trek franchise, nor has he seen any clips of the show<ref>[[Mailbag_3]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag_14]]</ref>. It is more likely that Chris picked up the phrase from cartoons like [[Family Guy]], which references Star Trek, considering how much he watched the show religiously.</blockquote>

;carniverous
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' evil, vengeful.

<blockquote>''On today's show, we will take a close-up look at the '''carniverous''' jerkops.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComic5P29.htm</ref></blockquote>Origin: A misspelling of "carnivorous". It is unknown what word Chris meant to use here, but "carnivorous" certainly wasn't it.</blockquote>

;[[China|china]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Female genitalia

<blockquote>''I love dykes! DYKES! '''CHINA!'''''<ref>[[CWC's_Second_Message]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, uncomfortable with directly saying the word "vagina", decided to alter the word to a cutesy, similar-sounding word. Based off of a term for porcelain "china".</blockquote>

;coldest shoulder

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' to rebel.

<blockquote>''Those people like me at the very least, NOT counting all of the deceitful people I have had the displeasure of knowing who turned '''Coldest Shoulder''' Against me and STARTED all of the Online Hatred.''<ref>[[April_2012_Facebook_posts]]</ref>

''One of which, Amanda, is one of the Part-Time Manajerks who gives her elders the '''coldest of shoulders'''.''<ref>[[Coffee Place]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A misuse of the phrase "turning a cold shoulder", a phrase used for the negligence of another person<ref>https://www.collinsdictionary.com/us/dictionary/english/turn-a-cold-shoulder-to</ref>. </blockquote>

;Come Adore
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A sermon from Chris's religion.
<blockquote>''That's all for now. Be safe and well.

Mrs. Jesus Christine Chan Sonichu.

Commodore Come Adore<ref>[[Jail Letter - 27 June 2022]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Yet another retarded pun from Chris, specifically based on the [[Commodore 64]].
</blockquote>

;[[Comeuppance|comeuppance]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Male orgasm.
<blockquote>''...I feel my '''comeuppance''' and I come into your mouth, my [[semen]] is inside your mouth and you'd swallow every drop. (...) And right after I'd given you my first round, my first '''comeuppance''', you would take, you would reach down, and you would take your face away from my penis...''<ref>[[Chris Sex Logs]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' [[Semen]], usually immediately after ejaculation. ''See also: [[CWC-isms#N|Navy]]''
<blockquote>''Yeah, and I'm just gonna keep bangin' your breasts over and over again until you get the first dosage of my '''comeuppance'''!''<ref>[[Kacey Phone Call]]</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: Chris uses the sexual slang "cum" as a [[For Julie's Eyes Only|verb]] for orgasm, but he may not realize it can also be a noun referring to ejaculate. In his mind, "comeuppance" apparently serves that purpose, viz., "that which has come/cum up."

In the real world, "comeuppance" is an English noun meaning [[Wiktionary:comeuppance|outcome which is justly deserved]] based upon the common verb "come," i.e., the state of coming forward to receive judgment. He is either unaware of the original definition of the word or does not appreciate the irony of telling women he's going to give them comeuppance.

Note that the contexts of the real word and Chris's version are different. When a woman is rebuked, she receives her comeuppance; when a woman gets Chris's hot load in her face, she receives ''his'' "comeuppance."
</blockquote>

;count you(r) blessing(s)
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used as a retort when someone complains about the quality of your work.
<blockquote>It’s an early thing; it will improve later on. Curb your enthusiasm and '''count your blessing.'''</blockquote>
Origin: In [[January 2020]] Chris was seen using the phrase when he was attacked after chimping out about being blocked on social media. Recently people have been questioning the quality of the newest [[medallions]], produced by [[Praetor]]. Chris, perhaps in an attempt to "calm the trolls down'' tells them to '''count their blessings''.</blockquote>

;crash into slumber (or crash and burn)
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To get so sad and [[Chris and stress|stressed out]] that you get tired from exhaustion.

<blockquote>And… the void in my heart that requires a sweetheart is open again, and it hurts. I hope you jerks and trolls who wanted to break us up… are happy… 'cause all you did was make me feel sad and depressed. And you made me '''crash… into slumber'''… a couple of times. And you know, it takes a lot of stress and exhaust… and such… to make a person feel like they're gonna crash and burn… into a whole bunch of s-- into a long slumber… that just basically sleeps o-- that just basically sleeps off the—uh, what's the word I was looking for? I had it. Ugh…<ref>[[Chris Chan Update 21 October 2008]]
</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris famously said that he "crashed into slumber" in the video [[Chris Chan Update 21 October 2008]], where he shows off how depressed and angry he was with his latest tomfoolery at the time. It could be because that one of Chris' main methods of coping with his stress is to sleep it off, and tried to make it sound hyperbolic by stating that he "crashed" onto the bed, as if he tried to get it done sooner.</blockquote>

;crestfallen
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Sad and disappointed

<blockquote>''I should have been Highly Recognized for my ARTISTIC TALENTS I showed in my Many Art Classes for the Award Ceremonies before Graduation Day. I felt '''crestfallen''' greatly from not getting recognized for any of my Talents. I EXCELLED IN MATH TOO FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Manchester_High_School</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I also HAD Hidden ALL of the Blue Armed Sonic Toys at Toys R Us here, concealed hidden amongst their metal cupboards, so they ALL would NOT be SOLD, and Best Boycotted for The Protest! They remained hidden for the longest time of over a Month; found and reshelved near the 20th of December to my personal dismay and '''crestfall'''. And at Best Buy, ALL Copies of THEIR Sonic Boom Games are STILL SUCCESSFULLY CONCEALED AND HIDDEN from View AND Purchase!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/26_December_2014</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Another obscure word Chris liked to use a lot, even today. It even got to the point where he tried to put it into a baffling progressive tense "to my dismay and crestfall".</blockquote>

;crooks
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Those who may steal Chris's intellectual property for malicious purposes. ''(pl.)''

<blockquote>''I aways keep my eyes open for '''crooks''' who take my [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]]'s name and put it in offensive use!''<ref>''[[:File:116-CWCCop.jpg|116-CWCCop.jpg]]''</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' websites, and even words on websites which communicate lies about Chris.

<blockquote>''And that [[ED]] page is one of those crooks. Every page--every word on the discussion page is a '''crook'''.''<ref>[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A finishing move Chris does on his adversaries in order to "curse" them, publicly or otherwise.

<blockquote>''Hmmm...'''Curse-ye-ha-me-HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/NO_D***_WAY,_IMPOSTOR!!!</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A reference to the Kamehameha energy attack from the [[Dragon Ball]] series, performed in the same way it is in the anime. Chris believes that he possesses [[Chris and reality#Magic|magical powers]]. Typically, these so-called magical powers would be used whenever an enemy gets in the way of whatever he wants to do, since Chris is too afraid to actually fight anyone. Therefore, he will rely on this magical power in order to gain control of whoever is giving him trouble.</blockquote>

;CWC-sense
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The ability to sense Chris's presence.

<blockquote> ''Seriously though, awesome timing coming in, just as we, and Chris, had just finished writing the lyrics...was your '''CWC-sense''' tingling?''<ref>https://www.patreon.com/posts/15092809</ref></blockquote></blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== D ==
|-
|

;D.A.
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' Unexplained, presumably a substitution to avoid the word "dumbass." Most likely ''not'' "District Attorney," although equally applicable to [[Marvey Blaziken]].

<blockquote>''You are obviously a troll trying to pick on my nerves; nice try, '''D.A.'''''<ref>[[Mailbag 15]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris intermittently decides to self-censor his profanities for the benefit of younger readers.
</blockquote>

;da
<blockquote>1. ''(article)'' [[Wikipedia:Eye dialect|Eye dialect]] spelling of the word [http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/the the].

<blockquote>''Y'all know me as [[DJ Jamsta|Jamsta Sonichu]], '''da''' DJ with da power!''<ref>[[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], page 43</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris writes "the" as "da" when he intends for his characters (or himself) to sound laid-back and cool. This is most notable with Jamsta Sonichu, who is supposed to sound like a hip radio DJ and/or a [[Niggos|Jamaican man]]. Chris may intend at times to do the same thing in his verbal communications, although his [[speech impediment]] makes it difficult to tell when he actually means to say "da."
</blockquote>

;Da Update
[[File:Daupdate.jpg|thumb|400px|[[Megan]], comparing Chris's [[Chris and his Ego|attitude]] to [[Dragon Ball Z|Goku]].]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' The latest news.

2. ''(phrase)'' The most recent fail Chris is responsible for.

<blockquote>''Hey, guys! What's '''da update'''?''</blockquote>

Origin: Dialogue used by Chris, in an exceedingly awkward attempt to sound casual, in the pages of [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]. As Chris's [[fans]] have searched the Internet for the latest news from our hero, "da update" has become shorthand for "the latest [[Relics of Fail|failure]] Chris has committed." The phrase became legendary when posted above the Chris-chan talk page on [[ED]] (eventually the page was locked, forcing mass migration to the [[PVCC (message board)|PVCC]]).

</blockquote>

;[[Darling|darling]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A potential lover, even one that shows no affection back at you.

<blockquote>''Thank you, Doopie '''Darling'''. :)<ref>[[July 2017 tweets#Thanks, darling]]</ref>''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris, so hellbent on being [[Chris and kindness|kind]] to just about any potential sweetheart he met, thinks it's appropriate to refer to women he doesn't know outside of the internet by pet names to sound like he really cares for them, despite it being creepy to most other people. Chris's main justification for using this word on women who don't bond with him is that the actor [[Wikipedia:Tallulah Bankhead|Tallulah Bankhead]] used this word a lot, ignoring the fact that she only did this while on set.</blockquote>

;[[Dating education|Dating Education]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' formal education in schools about dating people of the opposite sex.

<blockquote>''Also, in addition, while we also fully support Sexual Education in every high school, Christian Weston Chandler also highly recommends, and would gladly support, '''Dating Education''' classes, because, while Sex Ed is great for the eventual, well-earned intercourse after 3 or more dates, it is vital to learn what to do before that moment. It should be well0taught how to approach and ask one’s member of the opposite gender out for the very first date.''<ref>[[:File:DatingEducation.jpg]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The lack of "Dating Education classes" is something that Chris used to complain about all of the time, because he's simply incapable of finding a [[CWC-isms#S|sweetheart]], and that it would be a great advantage for people of his type to learn how to do so. Chris doesn't understand that a key aspect of obtaining a mate is to develop the proper [[Chris and socialization|social skills]], especially those around [[women]], and that it has very little to do with how much sex he has with them.</blockquote>

;dementia
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A synonym for Chris's [[autism]].

<blockquote>''My brain is blank and, I definitely wouldn't have realized. Word of the day, Dementia. The umbrella term for all the mentally wearing down people, I got some dementia okay? So give me time, give me space, alright? And some slack.''<ref>[[Live Game Stream - C-Log 04192017 - The Shirt]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;detail
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A thing of importance that Chris cannot recall at any given moment.

<blockquote>''I do not have the appropriate calm state of mind to make time to READ those numerous upon numerous small-print '''details''', much less memorize them.''<ref>[[Wikipedia#May 2009 drama]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

<blockquote>2. ''(noun)'' Something that Chris does not understand.

<blockquote>''There was one I remember from then where the essay had a lot of offensive content, including smoking, and I spoke my mind on how offended I was of it. Plus other details I misunderstood that he was expecting in the assignments.'' <ref>[[Jackie E-mails 9]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's ability to retain information is questionable (unless it's about [[Sonichu (comic)|something]] [[Lego|he]] [[Pokémon|obsesses]] [[PS3|over]]). As such, he "misunderstands" and "forgets" a lot of glaringly important things, such as [[Father call|how to live on his own]] and [[Jackie E-mails 2|the fact that he cheated on Ivy]].
</blockquote>

;devotee
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An [[enabler]] of Chris.

<blockquote>''Ah, I believe I have the proper term. Going from "Worshiper", I checked the thesaurus:"'''Devotee'''" in the term sounds better. "Devotees of Chris Chan Sonichu"(DoCCS). This is my better educates and thought suggestion." ''<ref>[[November 2019 social media posts#Devotees of Chris Chan Sonichu]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Believing himself to be a goddess, Chris needed a term to refer to any of his followers. The term was originally "worshiper", but then after a quick thesaurus search, he decided to change the term to "devotees", solely because he thought it sounded smarter. Although technically a synonym of "worshiper", the term "devotee" is more often used in Eastern religions such as Hinduism and Buddhism.
</blockquote>

;Did the do, to do the do
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To have sexual intercourse, likely under deceptive conditions

<blockquote>''[[Lovely Weather|Lovely]] was hot. She mistook me for myself and we went home from work that night, so Lovely and I '''did the do''', and it was awesome!''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_10/Page_2|Issue 10 Page 2}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An even more benign variation of the common euphemism for sex, "doing it". Likely taken from [[Wikipedia:Emission_Impossible|an episode]] of [[Family Guy]].
</blockquote>

;dige
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Marijuana

<blockquote>''My name's [[Inos]]... wha' chu up to? I am eclectic on this hedge... high on the hog... you wan' som' of this '''dige''', mon?''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_10/Page_70|Issue 10 Page 70}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Intended to be part of a coded reference to "Sonichu, Electric Hedgehog Digimon". It is not known why he changed the reference from "Pokemon" to "Digimon".
</blockquote>

;[[dimension]]
[[File:Chrisminecraft.jpg|right|thumb|In a universe of multiple realities, anything is possible according to Chris.]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Either our universe or a fictional one, such as the one in which ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' or ''[[My Little Pony]]'' are set, both held to be equally [[Chris and reality|real]] in Chris's ontology.

<blockquote>''For Our Home World and All other '''Dimensions''', Realities and Worlds; All Of Us! Dance! Dance! Dance!!!''<ref>[[Freestyle Dance With Me, For Our World]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Dumbing down some physicists' hypothetical notion of other physical universes embedded in mathematically higher-dimensional space, which has since seeped into pop culture and thence down to Chris.
</blockquote>

;[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Used as a reference to Chris's fecal incontinence.

<blockquote>''I have NUMBERS OF PAIRS OF '''DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS'''.''<ref>[[IRC_(20_January_2009)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this phrase during an [[IRC (20 January 2009)|IRC chat]] with [[Clyde Cash]] and [[BILLY MAYS]] after they alleged that Chris has a fondness to wear women's underwear. In order to confirm his straightness, he retorted by admitting the fact that he has "NUMBERS OF PAIRS OF DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS". Soon after, due to how humorous the phrase sounded, it became a shorthand for trolls to refer to Chris's fecal incontinence.</blockquote>

;disabled of crafting
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Too apathetic to work

<blockquote>''Since last December with the Lulu.com problems (resolved), that has left me with a bad emotional and mental scar. Leaving me feeling '''disabled of crafting'''...''<ref>[[August 2016 Facebook posts#Too lazy to work]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris being defensive when a customer asked how he could be trusted to follow through on an order, when he had failed to send out orders from his Etsy shop, which resulted in his seller account getting closed.
</blockquote>

;dispel
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' Reject, turn away

<blockquote>''[T]o dispel me is to discriminate against the LGBTQ community as well.<ref>[[Unban_contracts#GameStop|GameStop unban contract]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A misunderstanding of the meaning of the word.</blockquote>

;Dork of Ages
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Someone who deserves scorn for creating an [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] article on you.

<blockquote>He is the '''Dork of Ages'''. Y'all should be sending every last complaint and hatred towards—rain down upon him. Send him every last email you can. Shower him with as much hate as possible until that Encyclopedia Dramatica page is taken down, [gives a thumbs down] along with him.<ref>[[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used on [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] after he created Chris' Encyclopedia Dramatica page. This phrase was [[List of phrases Chris copied from media|taken]] from the American Dad episode "Dungeons and Wagons", where Hayley called Steve the "Dork of Ages" while he played "Dragon Shuffle".</blockquote>

;Drunk, High Aqua Teenatic
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Backstabber.

<blockquote>''You could be a Better, More Supportive Friend, instead of a '''Drunk, High Aqua Teenatic''' with your sweetheart!!!''<ref>[[October 2017 Facebook posts#Quinn breaks up with Chris again]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A bizarre attempt to turn the title of the Adult Swim cartoon, ''[[Aqua Teen Hunger Force]]'' into an insult.</blockquote>

;[[Duck]]
[[Image:BentDuck.jpg|thumb|right|An example of a bent duck]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's penis

<blockquote>''MY '''DUCK''' HUNGERS FOR TOM-TOM TO POUND!!!!!''<ref>[[I_Am_The_TRUE,_Original_CCWC]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Initially "duck" was taken to be a typo of "dick" since the "u" and "i" keys are close together. It was later revealed that Chris was using this neologism as an intentional euphemism to refer to his own penis.<ref>[[Mumble 8]]</ref>

''See also:'' [[CWC-isms#P|pickle]]</blockquote>

;Dyke

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A vagina.

<blockquote>I love dykes! DYKES! '''CHINA!'''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2008]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In actuality, the word dyke (or dike) refers to an embankment, wall, or ridge built to control or confine water. It is also a derogatory term for [[lesbian]]s, which is somewhat ironic, given Chris' homophobia at the time.</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== E ==
|-
|

;elbow-greased
[[Image:Elbow-Greased Strength.jpg|200px|thumb|Chris gets swole]]

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Earned from hard work and exercise

<blockquote>''There are no quotes that cite the use of this CWC-ism. It appears in his [[resume]], where he lists "elbow-greased strength" as one of his "functional skills"''</blockquote>

Origin: A misuse of the idiom, "elbow-grease", a figure of speech humorously used for tasks that involve manual labor only. </blockquote>

;[[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]]''

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any of the characters found in Sonichu which are hybrids of [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] characters and/or Pokemon.

<blockquote>''Since the inspiration and conception of Sonichu, the '''Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon''' on March 17, 2000, I have grown further in his stories, plots and adventures in a series of hand-drawn and computer-edited comic books.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris%27s_resume</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Despite the name, a majority of "Electric Hedgehog Pokemon" are neither Pokemon or hedgehogs. This misnomer may come from Chris's original characters being hybrids of two Sonic characters, both of whom are hedgehogs (Sonic and Amy Rose) and two Pokémon (Pikachu and Raichu).</blockquote>

;emotional differences

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A strong disagreement between two people.

<blockquote>''I told you! It was, it was because of, uh, '''emotional differences.'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call#The_Shit_Hits_the_Fan</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris mentioned that he got terminated from [[Wendy's]] in the [[Father Call]], due to their "emotional differences", possibly meaning that a heated argument between him and his employer ensued.</blockquote>

;empirical
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' resorting to experience to gain knowledge rather than through scientific means.

<blockquote>''So, throw away the book talk; be '''empirical''' and believe what you know is fact'' <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2012_Facebook_posts#Empirical</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris attributed the nearly opposite definition of the word to Jeremy Hilary Boob PhD, a character from [[Wikipedia:Yellow Submarine|''Yellow Submarine'']]. Considering this, Chris must have picked up this strange definition from the content in the Beatles Edition of ''Rock Band''.</blockquote>

;entendre

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Charisma or attraction

<blockquote>''Too much '''entendre'''?''<ref>https://www.patreon.com/posts/15092809</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Derived from the phrase "double entendre", a figure of speech used for words or phrases with a double meaning, typically [[Duck|with]] [[Mass Debating|one]] [[China|of]] [[Recycling|them]] [[Pickle|being]] [[Comeuppance|risque]].<ref>https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/double%20entendre</ref> In English, the word "entendre" isn't typically used outside of the phrase itself, but in many other languages like French and Catalan, it is understood to mean "to hear" or "to understand". Chris, thinking he knows everything there is to know about the English language, once again thought he would sound smart by using this obscure word.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== F ==
|-
|

;[[Fangs|fangs]]
[[File:Showing_Off_Fangs.jpg|thumb|right|200px|How Chris imagined himself when showing off his canines]]
[[File:ChrisCavities.JPG|thumb|right|200px|The reality. The red arrows point to Chris' cavities]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's canine teeth.

<blockquote>''They're called Eye-Teeth, but they feel and look like '''fangs''' of a vampire, dog or something to me.''<ref>[[Sonichu_Girls#Your_understanding_me_fukky_.281_January_2009.29]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I'm not afraid to SHOW MY '''FANGS'''!''<ref>[[CWC_Update_8_January_2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes his teeth to be unordinary compared to most other people's teeth, apparently believing canine teeth are some kind of special trait only a selected few people have. Because he believes his canines to be menacing, he gave them the name "fangs". Once in a while, Chris would show off his decaying teeth to scare his enemies. This usually works, although for the wrong reasons.</blockquote>

;faredoo
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection, imperative verb)'' Parting salutation, akin to "goodbye".

<blockquote>''Vessel of my loneliness for the past three years of anguish. I bid you fond...'''faredoo'''. Adieu. Fond farewell adieu...''<ref>[[The MovingFoward videos]].</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Accidental portmanteau of "farewell" and "adieu".
</blockquote>

;fart-minded

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' dumb and perverted.

<blockquote>Ha Ha! Take THAT, you '''fart-minded''', jerk [[MALE]] among ALL fart-minded, jerk Males that make up the Majority of the Worldwide Male Population! -:D<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivtWQTjXCDs</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in the comment section of a Stopmotion Lego animation, where a ''Lego'' minifigure is in a sexual relationship with a ''Lego Friends'' minifigure. Throughout this video, the Lego minifigure essentially acts how Chris believes most men do. At the end of the video, the male minifigure proceeds to fart, which disgusts the female minifigure. Also a possible butchering of the phrase "brainfart", which is used to humorously refer to a moment of absentmindedness.</blockquote>

;firstly
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' A word that indicates that Chris is about to tell someone why he's right. Often not followed by an enumerated list of reasons, despite the implication.

<blockquote>'''''Firstly''', Aspergers is NOTHING Similar to Autism; Aspergers pertains to MEMORY, Autism is Social Skills. and I'm High-Functionally Autistic''<ref>[[IRC_(02_January_2009)|IRC chat, 02 January 2009]].</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Use of "firstly" to begin a list, rather than "first," is a matter of dispute. While both words exist in the dictionary, "Firstly" has fallen out of common use in speech and tends to sound more formal, perhaps overly so. Chris seems to like this formality, probably because he thinks it sounds smart.
</blockquote>

;fondful
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' fond.

<blockquote>''Faithfully yours with '''fondful''' thoughts; Chris Chan.''<ref>[[Megan Emails, Jan-July 2007|Chris's email to Megan Schroeder]], 06 July 2007</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris apparently doesn't understand that "fond" is already an adjective by itself.
</blockquote>

;for good-like
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' final, but with the imagined possibility otherwise.

<blockquote>''And in June of 2008, he banned me from the store '''for good-like'''.''<ref>[[Wallflower E-mails|Chris's email to The Wallflower]], 18 February 2010</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Confusing modification of "for good".
</blockquote>

;foresee/foretell/foreknow
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To make a wild guess at something occuring, claiming it's a "prediction".

<blockquote>''#Saberspark Is right. This is one reason why I stay clear from certain games and shows. My intuition also senses and '''foresees''' the quality and feel without even having to watch or play it at all''<ref>[[March 20March 2025 social media posts#Brainrot]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(verb)'' To have predicted something that already happened or that someone else claimed would happen, but didn't.

Origin: Chris claims he has the ability to predict the future, an aspect of his divinity. However, Chris only ever makes these claims whenever an event has already happened, claiming he predicted it would, or when he makes a confident guess at the future based purely on his intuition.
</blockquote>

;foundate
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To dedicate, as in a monument or building.

<blockquote>''I, Christian Weston Chandler, re-'''foundate''' this monument that is the PAGE with MY SOLE HONEST TRUTH from my sound mind and heart.''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|1=Christian_in_his_Own_Words#Captain.27s_Log.2C_Stardate:_June_6.2C_2009|2=Christian in his Own Words}}.</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Likely a portmanteau of "found" and "dedicate", or a bizarre attempt to convert "foundation" into a verb.
</blockquote>

;four-boomerang-shaped symbol
[[File:Fourboom.jpg|thumb|right|"G'Day welcome to Auschwitz"]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' minced oath for "[[Wikipedia:swastika|swastika]]," especially the ''Hakenkreuz'' symbol of the [[Nazis|Nazi]] Party.

<blockquote>''Like Most People, I do not care much for Adolf; he was a terrible man, and even in jest, I WOULD NEVER want to portray him, much less, his '''four-boomerang-shaped symbol''' (I know what it is called, but I do not wish to type the word).''<ref>[[Mailbag 5#That wacky Hitler|Mailbag 5]]
</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris was apparently afraid to say the word "swastika," probably for the same reason he used to [[Niggos|fear using racial slurs]].
</blockquote>

;fourth wall

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A boundary that separates [[Reality Cartoon|reality cartoons]] and [[Dimensions|dimensions]] from dimension C-197.

<blockquote>''Hey, Everyone. I have another announcement for you all to do now, for yourselves and our OCs: Break Your Own '''Fourth Wall'''.
<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1195039493130199041</ref>''</blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' An abstract force that prevents people from talking to their OC's.

<blockquote>Our OCs in C-197 often break their '''fourth walls''', because they are aware of us, and it is our time and turn to return the favour.</blockquote>

Origin: Comes from the phrase "breaking the fourth wall", a figure of speech humorously used on characters that acknowledge the audience directly, or state their awareness of the media they're in. Chris has taken this to mean that all dimensions in the universe are separated by this kind of barrier, therefore calling them "the fourth wall". In a recent Twitter post, Chris has also stated that this mysterious force is the reason why people cannot see or interact with their OC's, but that the OC's themselves are fully aware of their creators, so will eventually break through the barrier every once in a while to speak to people of other dimensions.</blockquote>

;[[Friend Zone|friend zone]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The dreaded moment a sweetheart rejects you.

<blockquote>''A lot of times, especially if the friend in question is opposite of gender 18 or older, they may have sex on the brain. And when that person hears from you that you just want to be friends, or in the other term, put into the '''Friend Zone''', that person will feel like they failed at getting the sex they wanted, or Ever will from you.''<ref>[[August 2017 tweets]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' The lousiest excuse a sweetheart could give for not having sex with Chris.

<blockquote>''Nothing has happened in Women's Rights; the "Friend Zone" is only the LOUSIEST EXCUSE EVER to give to someone the woman deeply cares about and trusts so she could get out of sex or a relationship. I do not take kindly to that Excuse at this time.''<ref>[[Common Questions]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The Friend Zone refers to a relationship where one person desires romance, while the other only shows interest in friendship. Much like his stance on the Three-Date Rule, Chris believed that the Friend Zone is simply another rule explicitly placed on him by some unspecified authority to slow down his progress on completing his [[Love Quest]]. His belief that this is simply an "excuse" to avoid having sex with him reveals a lot on why he was [[Megan|overly-persistent with]] [[Wallflower|some of]] [[Doopie|his sweethearts]]. He couldn't imagine why any woman would not want to have sex with him, so he came to the conclusion that every woman he stalks are simply unfamiliar with sex and what goes into it.</blockquote>

;[[Fuzzy-wuzzies|fuzzy-wuzzies]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The rewards of giving Chris compliments.

<blockquote>''Compliments will get you '''fuzzy-wuzzies'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. Believed to be another example of Chris' random-access humor. May have been derived from an English assignment in [[Manchester High School|high school]], "[[Manchester High Leaks#Warm Fuzzies|Warm Fuzzies for Christian]]".

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#P|prickly-wicklies]]
</blockquote>

{{clear}}
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== G ==
|-
|

;[[Gal pal|gal-pal]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a female friend.

<blockquote>''And also, I would like to give a shout-out to...Ivy, sweet '''gal-pal''' of mine...and her friend Rachel across the hall from her, in a college within these United States!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Update_18_March_2009_More_Updated</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris rarely refers to any of his female friends as just "friends", simply because he thinks that all female friends have the potential to be [[CWC-isms#S|sweethearts]] before they're in the dreaded [[Friend Zone]]. Chris also states that due to his autism, this somehow means that he gets along much more easily with girls than with guys. <ref>Autism Tutorial Part 5</ref> Although this could be more due to the fact that he overall has had much better experiences with girls than with boys growing up, especially in high school. This has caused him to pick up more [[Transgender|effeminate traits and characteristics]]. The term "gal-pal" is typically used by women when they are talking to other people in their social clique. Chris therefore picked this phrase up from the girls he's talked to (possibly using the phrase because he sees himself as "one of the girls"). It is also common for [[homos]] to use this to refer to their female friends.
</blockquote>
;gawd
<blockquote>
1. ''(interjection)'' eye dialect of "god", Used in the place of "god" when it is used to express annoyance, shock, or pain.

<blockquote>''Life is f***ed up. (I had a real stressful Sunday afternoon) '''Gawd'''! Just... GAWD!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/2017_tweets#STRESSFUL_SUNDAY._GAWD.21</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Possibly meant to add dramatic effect to saying "god", which is already used to add dramatic effect.</blockquote>

;gaybian
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a male lesbian.

<blockquote>''Uh… simply put—and I am willing to say this… in sound mind and body: I… am a '''gaybian'''.''<ref>[[Chris_Comes_Out_of_the_Closet]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris only used this word once in the video [[Chris_Comes_Out_of_the_Closet]]. Before this video, [[Clyde Cash]] had threatened to harm [[Julie]] under the condition that Chris refuses to admit that he's gay. Chris being Chris, he had absolutely no idea that he was once again under another elaborate trolling scheme, and had no clue how to handle the situation. Chris thought he could be sly and admit to being gay, while also being attracted to women. Thus, he tacked on the word "gay" onto "lesbian" to create the word "gaybian" so that he can say that he's a "male lesbian", despite this being a complete contradiction within itself.</blockquote>

;geinus
[[Image:Robotnik.jpg|thumb|I'M A MAD GEINUS! [[Doctor Robotnik|ROBOTNIK]]! ROBOTNIK!]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a genius

<blockquote>''Robotnik! Robotnik! I'm a mad '''geinus'''! Robotnik, Robotnik!''<ref>[[Sonichu 1]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An accidental misspelling of "genius", this CWC-ism is the result of Chris's ability to spell, or lack thereof. In his futile attempts to spell words with "eni", he substitutes this with "ein", possibly due to his habit of spelling words phonetically.</blockquote>

;get it through your skulls
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' Used to clarify something to your fans
<blockquote>''So everybody '''get it through your skulls''', I'm the real deal.'' <ref>[[CCWC's Final Warning to the Second CWC]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this term a lot when trying to clarify various misconceptions about him, such as his straightness, and who the real CWC was. Variations of the phrase include "GET IT THROUGH YOUR THICK SKULLS", "Get it through your damn, dirty, immature skulls!", and "Get through your damn, dirty, stupid, idiotic, immature skulls".</blockquote>

;gitar
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' A guitar

Origin: How Chris pronounces the word "guitar".
</blockquote>

;give birth, give the birth
<blockquote>
1. ''(verb)'' To transfer possession of the state of having been born, by bearing as offspring.

<blockquote>''My mother and my father are both really nice, old-fashioned-type people who not only '''gave the birth'''--gave me birth at their ages...which my mother is sixty-six, currently, and my father is currently eighty. They both just turned that way in the last couple of months. And, uh, I was born in 1982. They gave me the birth...then, and, uh, anyway, it was so nice of--for them to give me the, uh, birth during the early [[1980s]].''<ref>[[Chris Chan's Public Announcement]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to think that a sentence like "Barbara gave birth to Christian" is grammatically equivalent to a sentence like "Barbara gave Go-bots to Christian."
</blockquote>

;GO!
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' Having a style similar to the cartoon ''Teen Titans Go!''.

<blockquote>''As MUCH, as I would like to agree; Cute as it may be, it is still '''GO!''' Version, and #GOPony is something we Really do not like.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1211396957203247104</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' Of a descent originating from [[Dimensions|dimension CZ-69]].

<blockquote>''Just; Most '''GO!''' individuals are...NO!!!''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1215833863718567937</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this CWC-ism to describe his distaste for the MLP:FiM spinoff series [[Pony Life]], believing it to be in the same vein as Teen Titans Go! due to its artstyle. He would go around on his [[Twitter]] account spamming Hasbro and/or users showing any interest in the show with some of his TSSSF cards as a means of protest using this euphemism to put it under a bad light.
</blockquote>

;go make a rhyme
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used by Chris to indicate that he is in a [[Chris and writing|poetic]] mood.

<blockquote> ''Oh, Back Off, '''go make a rhyme'''. Love will come your way in good time.<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/913230475774369794</ref> Keep Heart, Have hope and faith. Life is a coinkie-dink strafe. Have an open heart, don’t be afraid. Your sweetie is likely in your friendship parade.''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris intended to write a rhyme in order to sound poetic in a tweet, continuing with the rhyming schtick in several subsequent ones. Due to his own laziness, the best Chris could come up with in terms of words that rhyme with "time" is "rhyme".
</blockquote>

;[[Godjesus]]
[[Image:Jesusbot.jpg|thumb|This is who Chris actually believes in.]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(shorthand)'' God and Jesus Christ.

<blockquote> ''As I have guide, as I was guide [sic] by, uh, God and Jesus. And because I, uh, cheated on Ivy lately, '''Godjesus''' were mad at me, so, even though she r-, even though she requested the recent items of question, sex-, [quietly] sexual stuff--videos and pictures--I am being punished because the trolls are getting their hands on them.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Matthew_5:27,_CWC_Confessions</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And also, who I'd like to thank, '''GodJesus''', our God and our Lord and savior, for their support, for their support as well, I pray to them every day, and I follow, I am guided by Jesus.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Update_9_April_2009</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris appears to be somewhat aware of the Holy Trinity (Holy Spirit, Son, and Father), the three forms that God takes in mainstream Christianity. Despite accepting Jesus as the son of God, Chris believes that God and Jesus are essentially the same entity. As a result, whenever he mentions God, he is never reluctant to mention Jesus in the same sentence. Because of this, Chris made this CWC-ism as a shorthand of "God and Jesus". This CWC-ism was the primary inspiration for the term "[[Godbear]]" to humorously refer to [[Leonard Bearstein]], who Chris has credited for his name change. Chris now no longer uses his CWC-ism, now referring to both God and Jesus as separate [[OCs]]. Chris now calls God "Emmanuelle".</blockquote>

;grand number of pounds
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' Extremely heavy.

<blockquote> ''Note: The chair weighs a '''grand number of pounds'''!<ref>[[Power]]</ref>'</blockquote>

Origin: Used in a video where he tried to prove his strength to [[Vanessa Hudgens]], who was actually [[Joshua Martinez]], by lifting an office chair.
</blockquote>

;grinds my gears
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used by Chris to indicate he is annoyed with something.

<blockquote>Firstly, I got your image in my mailbox; while I thank you for your fanart, No Offense, but I do not appreciate Sonichu drawn looking retarded; I feel it '''grinds my gears''' a bit.<ref>[[Mailbag_2#In_which_Chris_insults_someone_who_drew_a_picture_for_him]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>Something that '''grinds my gears''' is how people are not accepting of the neutral terms of "darling" or "dear".<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:OpenLetter.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this phrase almost every time he wanted to indicate he was annoyed and not outright [[angry]]. It is believed that Chris has picked up this archaic phrase from [[Family Guy]], specifically from a segment from the show called "What Really Grinds My Gears", where Peter is talking about things that annoy him or "grinds his gears".

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== H ==
|-
|

;hand-drawing
[[Image:Chris holding a pencil.png|thumb|Chris holding a pencil|200px]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An original drawn image, as opposed to a facsimile of that image.

<blockquote>''I mean, does that look like a printout to you? No! It's a '''HAND-DRAWING'''! It's the original hand-drawing of the back cover I constantly used! Among all the other hand drawings on my SHELF! In my BINDERS! IN THIS ROOM! In this house!''<ref>[[Chris dispels videogame rumors]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(verb)'' To sketch without the aid of digital technology, such as a computer.
[[File:Sonichuipaddrawing2020.jpg|thumb|A non-example made by Chris.]]
<blockquote>''No, actually, what I thought, is that you skip the '''hand-drawing''' and you draw everything on your PhotoShop with your computer mouse.''<ref>[[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 2]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's process for producing his drawings is to draw them, by hand, on physical paper, and then scan the paper into his computer and use image editing software to add effects like lettering or (for the purpose of breaking the fourth wall) photographs. He takes comfort in the belief that ownership of the original paper drawings is evidence of his authorship and will frequently cite this in defense against perceived thieves and trolls.

Chris also thinks that drawing on a computer instead of paper is an inferior method of producing artwork; he thinks the results look "blocky and low-resolution," which probably speaks more to his [[:File:179-ShineSchuChara.jpg|his own experience using MSPaint]] than the artistic quality of, for example, [[Asperchu]]. The fact that a digital artist like Alec Benson Leary is nonetheless ''using his hands'' does not seem to have occurred to Chris.
</blockquote>

;Haterade

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a metaphorical drink consumed by haters.
<blockquote>''Therefore, for all of you '''Haterade'''-Chugging “GET A JOB!” spouters out there, I suggest you Shut Up and enjoy your ability to settle in a cozy Office or wherever. For the rest of us, the worlds and the dimensions are our Offices, and we are doing our best, so we can reach our respective Fated Destined Promotions. But, I Digress. <ref>[[June 2019 social media posts#Fan art isn't thoughtful when it feeds into Chris's delusions]]</ref>''</blockquote>

<blockquote>''Put down the '''Haterade'''; this is not going against any rules, it is just the way it is. Hey! I still have my flaws, so I am definitely Not a Mary Sue type of OC. Also, if I wanted a shot glass of '''Haterade''', I would read most anything this dimension’s @realDonaldTrump ever wrote.''<ref>[[June 2019 social media posts#Fan art isn't thoughtful when it feeds into Chris's delusions]]</ref></blockquote></blockquote>

<blockquote>2. ''(noun, informal)'' excessive negativity, criticism, or resentment.

<blockquote>''This is in reference to the Nypical '''Haterade''' Comment of “Get A Job” that is not only thrusted upon me, but to everyone who is creative and have powerful in their own respective, individual rights.<ref>[[June 2019 social media posts#Fan art isn't thoughtful when it feeds into Chris's delusions]]</ref>''</blockquote>

Origin: Originally said by Lars in the 2010 [[Lars Call]]. Chris then used it almost nine years later. Likely a pun on the sports drink Gatorade.
</blockquote>
;[[heart level]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's way of measuring his emotional state

<blockquote>''100% Change the number to change your '''heart level''' and you can write a sentence to indicate how you feel.''<ref>[[Heart_level]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The concept of the "heart level" most likely stems from Chris's inability to understand emotions. As an alternative, Chris tends to use video game terms in order to measure such emotions.</blockquote>

;heal
<blockquote> 1. ''(verb)'' to ejaculate into someone.

<blockquote>''Had I Not '''healed''' her, she would be dead Late August.''<ref>[[Jail Letter - 16 November 2021]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris had somehow come to the conclusion that sex with his mother would make her more youthful, hence "healing" her.

</blockquote>

;heartsweet
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a [[sweetheart]].

<blockquote>''Rosey, as often as birds tweet, will you be my lovely '''heartsweet'''?''<ref>"[[Sonichu's Ode to Rosechu]]"</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Rearrangement of "sweetheart," possibly coined initially to provide more rhyming options in poetry. Chris primarily uses this term in Sonichu's dialogue, as the character's pet name for Rosechu. When speaking for himself, Chris tends to prefer "sweetheart," although the trolls use "heartsweet" in conversation with him.

''See also: [[sweetbolt]]''
</blockquote>

;heavyweight
[[File:Studalert.png|thumb|Chris does NOT look like Chris Farley]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Stockboy; person employed to move heavy objects and perform other menial labor.

<blockquote>If she gets pregnant and can't work, then I would be working. I would be working VERY HARD AND HEAVILY. [...] If I have to I would be, get one of the '''heavyweights''', that just moves the boxes around the, stock the shelves at a grocery store.<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' heavy.

<blockquote>I do not think Chris Farley looks like me at all, plus he was a LOT more '''heavyweight''' than me, and he was more wild than me.<ref>[[Jackie_e-mails_Part_2]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, as usual, has to repurpose words rather than use the existing words that already mean what he wants to say.
</blockquote>

;hedgehog-defensive (or hedgehog)
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Protecting oneself by curling up into a ball, just like a [[Sonic the Hedgehog|hedgehog]].

<blockquote>And I do understand all that. Believe me, and I need not be reminded of the worst part, but my '''hedgehog-defensive''' state and all of the tears and leaking mucus and whole body paralysis that happened to me then and there will haunt me in reminder of that.<ref>[[TooManyGames#Personal_space_talk]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>@MLPSilverQuill, having one’s own spirit killed is really not fun nor funny at all. And, believe me, I was literally in a worse huddled position than what I see here, and I FELT DEVASTATED at that moment. I went full '''Hedgehog Defensive''' and let my quills keep others back. It Hurts<ref>[[April_2019_social_media_posts#Hedgehog-defensive_state]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Replacing the likes of his [[Megatron pistol]] and his [[pepper spray]], Chris has adapted the habit of rolling up into a ball to protect himself from unwanted physical contact. The protective state he dubs "the hedgehog-defensive state" is most likely based off of the spin-dash attack from the Sonic the Hedgehog franchise, which the titular character uses to attack foes.</blockquote>

;[[hermaphrodite]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A derogatory term for passing transgender women, particularly those that haven't gotten bottom surgery.

<blockquote>''OH MY GOD!!! UGH!!! ARE YOU REALLY A '''HERMAPHRODITE'''?! I'm sorry, but that naughty picture just really shocked me and made me want to throw up. *deep breath* You do have a pretty face, but what happened just now is just like the movie, "The Crying Game", or the Thanksgiving episode of "The Cleveland Show".''<ref>[[Mailbag 25#It's a trap, again!]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' A person of an ambiguous gender, or who is female, who also has a penis.

<blockquote>If a '''Hermaphrodite''', I would raise it to be male regardless since it would not have any eggs anyway. Plus big bonus for (him) in sex with all women (lesbians included I would imagine).<ref>[[List of OkCupid Answers]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin:A misuse of the archaic term for intersex people. Chris appears to use this term to refer to someone he deems as "almost a woman", which is also shown when he referred to some of his female characters as "all female" when having their penises removed. Chris used this term when he noticed that the sweetheart [[Bailey Jay]] had a penis, and she explained to him her experiences as a transwoman. Chris also notably talked about how if he had a "hermaphrodite" as one of his offspring, he'd raise them as a boy. Chris's rather specific usage of this term also shows some of his prior beliefs about gender before he transitioned himself, such as who he deemed "male" or "female" in the first place.</blockquote>

;[[HEXBox]]
[[File:KillThatHexBawx.jpg|thumb|]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any of the video game consoles made by Microsoft, primarily the Xbox 360.

<blockquote>I never cared for the '''HEXBox''', and frankly it LACKS heavily in comparison to the Wii and PS3, PLUS YOU HAVE TO PAY THEIR FEES TO EVEN GO ONLINE OR DOWNLOAD DEMOS WITH IT.</blockquote>

Origin: Due to his [[Chris and brand loyalty|Brand Loyalty]], Chris had an irrational hatred for the XBox, simply because of how much you've got to pay for it to access some of its content<ref>[[Mailbag_5]]</ref>. Because Chris viewed this device as a curse to humanity, he tacked the word "hex", which is defined as being a curse, onto the original name of the console.</blockquote>

;hide behind/under his mother's skirt
<blockquote>1. ''(idiom)'' To behave in a cowardly, immature fashion.

<blockquote>''You come to me now. Come face me like a man. Unless you want to continue being called a cow-a quivelling coward who '''hides under his mother's skirt'''.''<ref>[[Challenge for Clyde II]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An antiquated phrase alluding to children literally hiding behind their mother's skirts when frightened.
</blockquote>

;hippo on one's head
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A predicament or unpleasant situation one is currently facing

<blockquote>''I'M WET. I'M COLD. THERE'S A HIPPO ON MY HEAD. AND CLEARLY, I'M NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO DO THIS ON MY OWN.''<ref>[[:File:JailArt15.jpg]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Someone's [[wikipedia:Hippocampus|hippocampus]]

<blockquote>''(EVERYBODY has a Hippo on their head; it is called the Hippocampus)''<ref>[[:File:FSM2.PNG]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris states in an e-mail directed at [[Regina Novakova]] that the phrase originated as an example of his [[random-access humor]], apparently as a pun of the word "hippocampus". Following from this, he would famously use the term in a [[HippoOnYourHead|Flipnote animation]] of a person literally getting crushed by a falling hippo, and then use the term several more times to describe the "weight" of the hippo on people's heads. He has lately used this term to describe his struggles with being in jail in a drawing sent to [[Praetor]].

</blockquote>

;[[homo]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A male homosexual

<blockquote>''Yes; the '''Homos''' I have heard from try to push their damn lifestyle in my face, and I DO NOT CARE FOR THAT AT ALL; What they do behind closed doors is None Of My Business, and I still Do Not Care to know a Damn Thing about it.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Common_Questions''</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' A non-passing transgender woman, particularly one Chris doesn't deem an authentic woman

<blockquote>''So I would- so I would say, good luck being a fake woman because you'll never be able to achieve true femdom! And you'll always be a dang homosexual male, 'cuz you're born that way, you gonna to stay that way pretty much even if you're gonna- if you're gonna have your dick either chopped off or tucked in! People are still gonna look at you so ill. In the majority of this country.''

''Anyway, that's my response for now.''

''Damn '''homo'''.''<ref>[[Response to ADF]]</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(adjective)'' homosexual

<blockquote>''Every one of you who thinks I'm '''homo''' and calls me that—-because I am not; I'm straight! I'm straight!''<ref>[[CWC's_Second_Message]]</ref></blockquote>

4. ''(adjective)'' relating to homosexuals

<blockquote>''Again, to reiterate the issue, THE GOD DAMN F***IN' '''Homo''' Ads MUST BE GONE!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Blog</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Before the [[Tomgirl Saga]], Chris had a hatred for homosexuals, out of fear that he'll become one himself. Even uttering words like "gay" and "homosexual" would make him uncomfortable. Chris also believed that those that strayed too much from their assigned gender at birth would turn out as being gay, which explains his defensiveness towards his more effeminate traits.</blockquote>

;[[Honest Content|honest]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' NSFW, containing adult content.

<blockquote>''Parental Advisory - VERY '''HONEST''' content.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic10P97.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris only has a slightly good understanding of what honesty is. However, Chris doesn't seem to understand when it's most appropriate to be honest. In his mind, to attract mates, he has to be honest all of the time, even if this includes instances of his sexual misadventures. Chris knows that he's not supposed to discuss such topics publically with ordinary people, so he would have to keep such things in secret. Therefore, in his mind, it would be the honest thing to do to discuss such actions.
</blockquote>

;Hurtful Truth Level
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A point at which honest criticism should be stopped so as to avoid hurting a person's feelings, regardless of the usefulness of the advice.

<blockquote>''And another thing, When constantly exceeding that '''Hurtful Truth Level''' to me, it feels like to me you're, and you may as well have, told me, "I Hate You! I Hate You!", and forget about me.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 23]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Said in an email to Jackie after she had pointed out several glaring flaws in Chris's lifestyle and personality. Rather than take her criticism to heart and improve himself, he got angry and defensive, wishing that she would show sympathy for him instead.
</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== I ==
|-
|

;I can feel the cosmos
[[File:I can feel the cosmos.jpg|thumb|right]]
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Statement of achievement and oneness with the universe.

<blockquote>''I promise, uh, three da—three pages a day, drawn or colored, but, also with the, uh, website, and God/Jesus's support, I feel like... we will be seeing many new—many new thing. The website will be better. '''I can feel the cosmos!''' Peace.''<ref>[[CWC Update 9 April 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Inspired by a line from the game Katamari Damacy, [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UmWxNFq6_3U "Oh, I feel it. I feel the cosmos."]
</blockquote>

;I got a fish

<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Claim that one owns a fish.

<blockquote>'''''I got a fish!''' Would ya like to make a wish?''
''I got a fish Would ya like to make a wish?''
''I got a fiiiiiiiiish! Would ya like to make a wish?''<ref>[[I_Got_A_Fish]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in a song of the same name, where Chris' [[random-access humor]] shines.</blockquote>

;I HATE ME TOO!!!

<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' A self-destructive phrase used to attempt to gain pity from trolls

<blockquote>''You know what, '''I HATE ME TOO!!!'''''<ref>[[You know what, I HATE ME TOO!!!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used as part of the title of a gallery found on Chris’s [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] Page.
</blockquote>

;[[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD]]!
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expressed angrily when you wish to break someone apart to kill them

<blockquote>''Jason Kendrick Howell... you BASTARD! BASTARD! You hacked into everything! You have driven me so beyond the wall, I can't even DESCRIBE it! YOU'RE LAUGHING NOW, BUT... '''I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD!''' Goodbye!''<ref>[[Jason Kendrick Howell message]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used as a [[death threat]] to [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] after he has hacked Sonichu.net.</blockquote>

;IBAChandler
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Abbreviation for "I be a chandler," i.e., "I am a person named 'Chandler.'"

<blockquote>''I am so sick of hearing that stupid name that somebody made up back when I had that '''IBAChandler''' account, and I be a Chandler. You know, "I" being myself, "B" standing for specifying who I am, and "Chandler" being my last name.''<ref>[[Show RESPECT to me, "C"CWC]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(proper noun)'' [[YouTube]] username in use by Christian Weston Chandler during his conflict with [[Liquid Chris]], leading trolls to accuse Chris of being an impostor of Liquid named [[Ian Brandon Anderson]].

3. ''(proper noun)'' Name of a ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' villain based upon Liquid Chris, ironically named for the real Chris's alias.

<blockquote>'''''I B A Chandler''', And I am here to copycatly sieze claim of you hedgehogs and this city from your absent mayor's domain.''<ref>[[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], page 79</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Inspired by [[Bob Chandler]]'s license plate, "I B MR C" ("I be Mister C.").<ref>[[CWC Update 29 July 2009]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;ID
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' Identifying.

<blockquote>''"That is the difference between Trans Gender and Vestites; '''ID''' as the other sex, and dressing like it, respectively"''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-335#post-2635076]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Possibly derived from ID meaning "Identification". </blockquote>

;[[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the extremely high probability that any woman Chris talks to is not [[CWC-isms#boyfriend-free|boyfriend-free]].

<blockquote>''With the '''infinitely high Boyfriend-Factor''', I am not fond of about 99.999999999996% of the total male population, with a margin-of-error of the 4 billionth of a percent (for about 100 men) of whom are okay acquaintences.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Megan_emails,_Aug-Dec_2007</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In general, Chris will almost never find a sweetheart.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sweetheart#Will_Chris_ever_have_a_Sweetheart.3F</ref> Already aware of this fact, but not willing to admit he's not at all attractive to most women, Chris blames it on the fact that most men are "jerks", and that one probably is already dating the woman he's trying to latch onto.</blockquote>
;information overload

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An act of spamming a webpage with pictures.

<blockquote>''I had thought the '''Information Overload''' would somehow Take Down the page; I admit that I was mistaken.<ref>[[Chris chan (CWCipedia)]]</ref>''</blockquote>

Origin: When Chris saw all of the explicit pictures on his Encyclopedia Dramatica page, he decided that the best course of action would be to spam the article with his own pictures. His logic was that if he kept doing this faster than the other editors, they'd have to delete the article, as they just wouldn't catch up with him.
</blockquote>

;instinction

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An instance of something being used a certain way.

<blockquote>''Also, I would have the secondary definition of the word "gay", being Homosexual, REMOVED from the word in the dictionaries, and all '''instinctions''' and sayings of the word will ONLY LEGALLY be used to mean HAPPY, as it was originally intended among songs like "Deck the Halls"''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_and_English</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Once again an instance of Chris trying to sound smart by using a word that sounds foreign to him, made up or otherwise. The end result, however, gives the impression that Chris isn't familiar with the word "instances".

</blockquote>

;intersex

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Relating to any gender identity outside of the gender binary.

<blockquote>''As a Tomgirl, '''Intersex''' of Female Soul with Male Body, and a Tranny Cross-Dresser, I am in full support for Human Equal Rights for everyone."''<ref>[[August 2014 Facebook Posts#Chris comes out... kinda]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used the term "intersex" interchangeably with the term "transgender" on many occasions, and also uses it to refer to Silvana, who actually is intersex. This gives the impression that when he talks about something being "intersex", he means that it isn't entirely "male" or "female".

</blockquote>

;[[Iron Curtain|iron curtain]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The mostly hermetic seal between [[Reality Cartoon]]s, such as the [[Chris and reality|real world]] and the fictional universe containing [[CWCville]], that prevents the [[Dimensional Merge]] from proceeding.

<blockquote>''But we are getting increasing magics, here, with more and more opening portals and growing tears and cracks in the '''iron curtain'''''.<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-11-19-chris-begs-while-posting-creepy-photo-of-barb.63305/post-5610374 Twitter, 19 November 2019]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Coined by Sir Winston Churchill in 1946 to refer to the limits of Russian intrusion into central Europe after the War. Chris presumably heard it once in [[Manchester High School|history class]] and forgot what it meant, unless he is comparing his fictional world to the [[Chris and censorship|Soviet Union]]. Alternatively it was fed to him by the [[Idea Guys]].

''See Also:'' [[#F|fourth wall]]</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== J ==
|-
|
;Jail of Fail
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. A rather unappealing jail to reside in.

<blockquote>''I have a temporary Soul Partner, a Holy Flame Type, you may Remember her (on her repentence tour) keeping me safe, well, not abused, and good, alongside Many (Good) Angels, Spirits, and OP allies in and around this '''Jail of Fail'''. We presently have a genuine Turkish Prayer Rug and a deck of Playing Cards from the Commisary, along with very much appreciated Sports Bra, Socks with no holes, Earplugs, and a few other goodies.''<ref>[[Jail Letter - 4 October 2021]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Said in a letter to the long-time orbiter and enabler, [[Kenneth Engelhardt]].

</blockquote>

;janekop
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. A female [[CWC-isms#jerkop|jerkop]].

<blockquote>''YOU'RE UNDER ARREST. SO SAYS THIS '''JANEKOP'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Feelings_of_the_election_results</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Whereas the term "jerkop" is a portmanteau of the CWC-ism "jerk" and the word "cop", janekop is a portmanteau of the words "jane" and "cop". The word "jane" is a slang word for "woman". <ref>https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/jane</ref>
</blockquote>
;[[JERKS|jerk]]
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. Any male other than Chris and his dad in general, particularly those that Chris dislikes, especially one that gets in the way of his LoveQuest.

<blockquote>''On the flip side, I feel discomfort around men, because they can be such mean and cruel '''jerks'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_Girls</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The term "jerk" is generally defined as "A person with unlikable or obnoxious qualities and behavior, typically mean, self-centered or disagreeable".<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/jerk#Etymology_1</ref> As stated in the quote above, Chris believes that all men to be cruel, selfish, and overall unlikeable. Therefore, he views almost all men as jerks.
</blockquote>
;[[Jerkop|jerkop]]
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. An official of the law.

<blockquote>''I would have left peacefully, in fact, I was ready to go, but I had a prepared speech to say to them stupid '''Jerkops'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Get-Tar_Region</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Since Chris views most officers of the law as jerks, due to how often they'd thwart his LoveQuest, the term is a portmanteau of "jerk" and "cop". Possibly a pun on the word "jerkoff", which is defined as being "a contemptible man".<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/jerk--off</ref></blockquote>

;[[For Julie's Eyes Only|JULAAAAAAAY]]
[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|thumb|Chris preparing for hanky-panky with Julie, using a blow-up doll no less]]
<blockquote>''(interjection)'' 1. An expression used by Chris to indicate how much he'd love having sex for the first time with [[Julie]]

<blockquote>"Oh, Julie...'''JULAAAAAY''', JULAAAAAAAAAAY!!!"<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/For_Julie%27s_Eyes_Only</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris first shouted this infamous CWC-ism in the video [[For Julie's Eyes Only]]. He originally intended to share this video privately with [[Julie]], (unaware that 'she' was actually a 13-year-old male troll), to show what their first date would amount to, despite this breaking his Three Date Rule. Seeing how Chris was somewhat of a porn junkie,<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Chris%27s_Adam_%26_Eve_purchases</ref><ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Miyamoto_emails#Chris_Sets_the_Record_STRAIGHT</ref> Chris must have picked up that during sexual intercourse, one of the people may shout the name of the other person in order to "spice up" the orgy. When the video got leaked soon after, the term started to be used by trolls humorously, to the point where [[weens]] started using the phrase in excess, making the CWC-ism lose its luster.</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;jumping the shark
<blockquote>''(verb)'' 1. To start over from scratch

<blockquote>"I am moving out of this Twitter into creating a new one I created, @CPU_CWCSonichu. New and renewed followers will all be screened by my ally, as to keep out the Haters and Harassers. Starting up new and fresh. '''Jumping The Shark''' from old to new"<ref>[[Misc texts#CPU_CWCSonichu]]</ref>

</blockquote>

Origin: The term "jumping the shark" humorously refers to the point where something once popular which has begun to lose its viewer base pulls an extreme stunt in hopes of garnering attention. The term comes from an episode of the television show ''Happy Days'', where Fonzie literally jumped over a shark while water skiing. Ironically enough, despite Chris' misuse of the phrase, many people could easily say that the comic of Sonichu and Chris as a person have "jumped the shark" several times, especially with [[Retroactive continuity in Sonichu|retcons]] and- of course- Chris's change into a [[Transgender|transwoman]].

</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== K ==
|-
|
;kawaii
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' cute or adorable.

<blockquote>''That look really suits you; you look so '''kawaii''' and cool.😊''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1209184205776797697</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The mainstream Japanese word typically used to describe cute subculture. Chris has used this word in almost all cases where he describes anything he thinks is cute and cuddly, more so in recent times, where the use of this word is no longer taken seriously, and seen as more of a joke to poke fun at [[Joshua Wise|weeaboos]].</blockquote>

;[[Kick the Autistic]]
[[File:CWC gets kicked.jpg|thumb|A self-administered kick]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' America's favorite game

<blockquote>''I REALLY WANTED THAT TRIP SO I COULD HAVE A CHANCE TO IMPRESS MY SWEETEST MEGAN AND POSSIBLY FULFILL MY DREAM OF GETTING MARRIED AND SOON HAVE A DAUGHTER NAMED CRYSTAL. YET NOW I, A FRUSTRATED HIGH-FUNCTIONALLY AUTISTIC 25-YEAR OLD VIRGIN, HAVE BEEN BALLZ-BROKEN LIKE I HAVE THROUGH A BIG CHUNK OF MY LIFE IN AMERICA'S FAVORITE GAME, '''"KICK THE AUTISTIC!"''' *sigh*''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chop_Chop_Master_Onion%27s_Rap_Showdown</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Any action which involves doing something to Chris that he doesn't like

<blockquote>''And if you have so much free time to play the cruelest game of '''"KICK THE AUTISTIC"''', then you CAN and SHOULD put the time to better use; volunteer for a social chore; take up the culture in tasteful art; go out and socialize.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica#21_January</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(noun)'' Any form of discrimination towards Chris for being [[autism|autistic]].

<blockquote>''And so, the world continues to play the world's favorite game of "'''Kick the Autistic'''". I'm gonna need all the luck I can get. *Game Over*''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Vivitheg%27s_AIM_chat</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris had this paranoid idea that the whole world is going against him and his goals, solely due to his autism. In this sense, the fact that so many people supposedly wanted to thwart his goals made him feel like he was being "kicked" around. </blockquote>

;Kra-Kow!

<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase indicating that Chris roasted someone.

<blockquote>''What? I’m just telling the truth. I hear and see WORSE shit from you Haters. At this point, I’d rather look back in that memory than PTSD over y’all’s Hate-Filled content. '''Kra-Kow!'''''<ref>https://mobile.twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1231269768310722560</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. Most likely inspired by the sound lightning makes.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== L ==
|-
|

;Laughs Under Lucricities
<blockquote>
1. ''(backronym)'' backronym for "LULZ"

<blockquote>''Although, F.Y.I., "LULZ" is short for "'''Laughs Under Lucricities'''"''<ref>[[Chris chan (CWCipedia)]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Any form of humor made at Chris' expense

<blockquote>''... your bully of a boyfriend is the Original Author of the "Chris-chan" page that was put up there for the "LULZ", "'''Laughs Under Lucricities'''". Which I don't have to tell you is not only mean and cruel, the page is HORRIBLE''<ref>Chris emails 2008</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: It's likely that Chris first heard of lulz on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]-<ref>[[Chris E-mails 2008#August]]</ref> the slogan of which is "in lulz we trust"- and thus forever associated the term with trolling. Originally he would simply say "LULZ" ''ought'' to stand for "Laughs Under Lucricities," but he soon began implying that it already does.<ref>[[Chris_E-mails_2008|Email]] from Chris to Robert Simmons V on 12 August 2008</ref> Lucricities is seemingly a combination of "lucrid" (another non-word with apparent negative connotations that Chris has used<ref>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 48]]</ref>) and "ludicrous" but falls short of being a portmanteau and is more like the result of a head-on collision of the English language.

</blockquote>

;lesbian soul
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' What Chris believes to be his true [[Chris and sexuality|sexuality]].

<blockquote>''I am an all-around, good natured, high-functioning autistic, Female '''Lesbian Soul''', and Transwoman, artist, gamer and creative type.''<ref>https://www.facebook.com/pg/cwcville/about/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: When Chris declared himself transgender, he continued to be attracted to exclusively to biological females regardless of their own sexual orientation.<ref>[[Women Only Need Apply - No STD's]]</ref> Thus, Chris became a lesbian. As a way to assert to detractors that he was a lesbian, Chris cited himself as having a "lesbian soul" despite previously living as a straight man for thirty years.

 </blockquote>
;level-up king
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' Master of [[card games]].

<blockquote>''There must have been about 6 people including Chris and myself at the tourney and when he won he was jumping up and down a yelling "I'm the '''level up king'''!"''<ref>[[Mimms and Lucas Q&A#Follow-up]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Before his permanent ban from the [[GAMe PLACe]], Chris would play games of Pokemon and Yu-Gi-Oh with some of the other customers. Despite his sick obsession with both games, Chris never developed any type of strategy to compete with other players, making it very difficult to succeed at the game, even when he played against small children. Eventually, when the shop was just down to six people, which included Chris, the manager, [[Daniel Mimms|Mimms]], and [[Lucas]], Chris did win a match against a relatively new player, and excitedly jumped up and down at this accomplishment like a child. Along with this, he shouted the phrase "I AM THE LEVEL-UP KING!"</blockquote>

;like, you know
<blockquote>1. ''(discourse particle)'' Space filler during sentence.

<blockquote>''I don't want too much conflict to happen, '''like, you know'''. You wouldn't want too much conflict to happen, like, you know. I mean-like, you know, between you and him any further. Yeah.''<ref>[[I Love You Kacey]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris' speech consists mostly of uh's, um's, and other vocalized pauses.</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;live from home once again
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' An introduction stating that one is recording themselves from their home.

<blockquote> ''Hello everybody this is Christine Chandler coming to you '''live from home once again''' and we're going to talk about the recent and more obvious topic, of "The Dimensional merge". Yes! This dimension! Right here! 1218. Is going to be merged with our sister dimension "C197" where all of our s- where most of our superheroes, super-villains, OCs, and what have you, and other characters, consisted, have been existing and co-existing. Yep!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Dimensional_Merge_Announcements</ref></blockquote>

Origin: This phrase became Chris's typical means of starting his videos since late 2015, replacing the famous Captain's Log. Although it is sometimes used appropriately (i.e. livestreams), Chris uses the phrase even in prerecorded videos that are not, in fact, live.</blockquote>

;[[Love Quest]]
<blockquote>1.''(noun)'' Chris's former on-going search for a sweetheart.

<blockquote>''As for Wes, I blame all of these happenings on him. If he had not taken my life-long friend away from me, I might have a Pretty Girlfriend today. And I would not have had to set out on endeavoring '''LOVE QUEST'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Since attending [[PVCC]], Chris has embarked on a 15-year long quest to find his true love. Chris constantly failing to achieve this goal was what gave this CWC-ism its name.</blockquote>

;lovehog
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A lover in a relationship between two [[CWC-isms#E|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]].

<blockquote>''Also, I have finished the drawing for you, and I have shown off the Original '''LoveHog''' Couple's Wedding Rings, and their three children: Cerah Rosey, Robbie Sonee and (Shiney Rosey) Christine Rosey.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Katie_Bay_E-mails_4</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A portmanteau of "love" and "hedgehog".</blockquote>

;lucricities
<blockquote>1. ''(pl. noun)'' lurid acts or motivations

Origin: Chris completely made this word up, presumably based on "lucrid," which may in turn be based on the actual word "lurid." According to Chris, the word "lulz" can mean either "Laughs at my expense" or "Laughs under lucricities," so presumably the two contexts are equivalent.
</blockquote>

;lucrid
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' obscene, profane, wicked
<blockquote>''And promoting the hatred, and...drawing such loose—such '''lucrid''' mockeries is not gonna further the story plot or have anything new created, or even gonna help in any way...''<ref name=csm>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. Possibly a corruption of "lurid," given the context. Alternatively, it might be a corruption of "ludicrous." Chris has used this word to describe the homoerotic/dickgirl art on the ED page, as well as the fan comic in which he was depicted as a man-baby. Ironically, even before Chris used this word
</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== M ==
|-
|

;make one's own peeps n' poops

<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' to urinate and deficate at the same time

<blockquote>''Uh, actually, uh, actually Crystal is uh, doing, is uh, doing her preschool homework, and uh, Reg-, and Reginald's been uh, been a messy lil' babychild! '''Made his lil' peeps n' poops'''! And he went, and he went weewee all over the bathroom.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/PlayingHouse''</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from a clip of Family Guy, where Herber the Pervert is letting his dog out to "make his pees n' poops". <ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZtlwEfZEmrg</ref></blockquote>

;Mama
[[File:Christine and pikachu.jpg|right|thumb|Mama Christine with a [[Sonee]].]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' What Chris refers to himself as when roleplaying as one of his [[OCs]].

<blockquote>''I am going to some shopping and donating amongst the artists affected by the COVID virus of this Dimension, on behalf of '''Mama''', Chris Chan Sonichu. Thank you, again, to the individual who bought the book set recently. Still waiting for the set of #TSSSF cards to sign and offer.''<ref>https://mobile.twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1251259373810302977</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes himself to be a parent to his characters. Since he identifies as a woman, he has given himself the alias “Mama”. Chris further shows his lack of self-awareness by not realizing how awkward it is to have anyone, even his own characters (who are presumably teenagers) refer to him as such.</blockquote>

;[[Manajerks|manajerk]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a store manager

<blockquote>'' two Manajerks asked me to leave, because they said that I was loitering; I was NOT!''<ref>[[CWC's Diary#2005]] (20 July)</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A portmantau of "manager" and "jerk". </blockquote>

;[[Mary Lee Walsh|Mary Lee Walshing]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' akin to to Mary Lee Walsh

<blockquote>''She has proven herself to be a cold-hearted, uncaring, uncompassionate, lack-of-understanding, bigoted, discriminating, selfish, '''Mary Lee Walshing''', Witch Bitch!''<ref>[[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Chris Expresses His Outrage for Walmart]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's ongoing resentment against his old college dean has led him to compare a Wal-Mart manager who banned him from her store to Walsh. He apparently fails to comprehend that the "-ing" suffix is generally associated with verbs.</blockquote>

;mashed potato grenade

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a [[Wikipedia:Stielhandgranate|Stielhandgranate]], a special German hand grenade with a handle.

<blockquote>''I want to just kill him; destroy his goody-two-shoes nature, soul, heart and all that shit my '''mashed potato grenade''' could shatter, but leave his body in tact, so I'm not committed fro murder.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2013_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in a Facebook post sent to [[Megan Schroeder]] accusing her of his [[List of places that have banned Chris|ban]] from the [[The GAMe PLACe|Game Place]], where he [[Chris and reality|makes paranoid claims]] of what she, [[Mimms]], [[Lucas]], and [[Snyder]] were thinking that day. A corruption of "potato masher grenade", a common English nickname of the Stielhandgranate<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stielhandgranate</ref>.</blockquote>

;[[Mass debating|mass debate]]
[[File:Mass_Debate.jpg|right|thumb|Massive Debating]]
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' to pleasure one's self; to masturbate

<blockquote>''I've actually done it '''mass debating''' to myself so many times, even with a hunk of - even with an inflatable plastic woman...''<ref>[[Kacey Call 7]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: This particular euphemism comes from Chris's tendency to refrain from using inappropriate language, as well as his unusual variation of a southern accent combined with a minor speech impediment.</blockquote>

;mental block

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's autism

<blockquote>''And, uh, during my high school years, I was used to being surrounded by… girls… in my circle, and after having to, uh, leave them I felt ever so lonesome. And, after the stress from some of the people—people at PVCC, as well as my '''mental block''' of autism, it became hard from me to approach gir—approach the girls like I used to.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_Chan%27s_Public_Announcement</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris refers to his [[autism]] as a "mental block" because he believes the term refers to a disability. In his case, his supposed disability to socialize with girls. In reality, a mental block is the inability to remember a specific thing at a given moment. <ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mental_block</ref></blockquote>

;Meta

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' being able to break through the fourth wall.

<blockquote>''Also, there is no problem with breaking your own fourth wall with us from your dimension, here. Go '''Meta'''. We are certainly Meta with and for you all as well.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1316825180610670592</ref></blockquote>

Origin: From the Greek prefix meaning "after" or "beyond". Chris views all cartoons as being on a dimension higher than our own. According to him, being able to break through the iron curtain entails obtaining a higher mode of consciousness.
</blockquote>

;mislabel

<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' to put a label on Chris or any of his creations in a way he doesn't like, regardless of truth
2. ''(noun)'' a label of such slanderous nature; see also "misunderstanding"
<blockquote>''I am NOT a Dictator. Why are you giving me an even WORSE '''Mislabeling''' than the Homosexual Mislabelings? Why do YOU have to be so bored that you have to make up NEW mislabelings to try and deface me over and over again? ''<ref>[[Common Questions#1_February_2010]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Just about everywhere. He appears to use this term as often as the word "slanderous". Curiously, the redundancy "ill-mislabeling" (as if there were any other kind) has appeared once.<ref>[[CWC Blog#28_December_2009]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;misspeak

<blockquote>1.''(verb)'' to lie

<blockquote>''Sometimes, I have '''misspoke'''. But you are more important to me than ANYTHING. Believe me! I swear. Hand to God. And on my Bible. I'd have to go look for it.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/ToJackie</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Instead of accepting that someone has called him out on [[Lies|his bullshit]], Chris prefers to say he "misspoke". Needless to say, no one has fallen for this ploy.

</blockquote>

;misunderstanding

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a deliberate view that contradicts Chris; see also "mislabel"
<blockquote>''*AND WE WILL NOT TAKE THE '''MISUNDERSTANDINGS''', THE MISLABELS, AND ALL THE LIKE SITTING DOWN!!!''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|1=Issue_9/Page_39|2=Issue 9 Page 39}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Misappropration. Note that it is not, as in reality,<ref>[http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/misunderstanding Merriam-Webster Dictionary, "misunderstanding"]</ref> a mistaken notion (alternatively a dispute) based on faulty information, but a malicious action worthy of [[tard rage]]. Apparently a slanderous troll has to actively "misunderstand" Chris. Also, Chris has used the related word "misunderstood" (participle adjective) as an insult, not realizing that if the troll misunderstood (transitive verb) him, ''Chris'' would be the one that was misunderstood (participle adjective).<ref>[[Mailbag 39#Rosechu_the_transwoman|Mailbag 39]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;modnar
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' random

<blockquote>''I may be '''modnar''', but I try not to be offensive, and if I do, then I am sorry. I can not please Everyone.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter</ref></blockquote>

Origin: "Random", spelt backwards.</blockquote>

;[[Monthly tugboat|monthly tugboat]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's Social Security Disability Service

<blockquote>"I'm getting by livin' with my folks and a '''monthly tugboat.'''"<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Monthly_tugboat#References_by_Chris</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris apparently coined the term "Monthly Tugboat" due to a comparison he makes between gaining money through his SSDS vs. winning the lottery. In his mind, winning the lottery is like riding a "Luxury ship that can easily sink", while gaining money from the government is the same as getting cargo from a ship pulled by a tugboat. <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/BlueSpike_Skype_Logs_12</ref></blockquote>

;morrow

<blockquote> 1. ''(noun)'' Synonym for moral.

<blockquote>''The '''Morrow''' remains: Look up to whoever and whatever you like as your childhood hero like no one else is watching you; remain proud with your choice and preference. 💜⚡️''<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts#Chris supports playing with whatever toys you want]]</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: Unknown, possibly a corruption of the word moral. Used exclusively by Magi-Chan during Chris month-long twitter roleplay in August and September of 2019.
</blockquote>

;Mother Nature errand
<blockquote>1. ''(idiom)'' The bodily urge to either [[Piss|urinate]] or [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|defecate]].

<blockquote>''All right, well, ladies, it’s been fun, but I gotta split and take care of ah... y’know, a '''Mother Nature errand'''.''<ref>[[Sonichu Home Club]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A peculiar take on the idiom "call of nature".
</blockquote>

;[[Muscle bra|muscle bra]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A sports bra used for covering a man's bare chest.

<blockquote>''And you know what, I highly recommend this to every dude who goes around shirtless: wear a '''muscle bra'''. Because nobody, and I mean nobody wants to see your dog-gone ugly pecs, they're so ugly and repulsive, ugh... creeps everybody out.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Clyde_is_Weaker_than_Water</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Contributing to his previous fear of the homos, Chris also had a fear of seeing the bare chests of other men out of fear that it'll make him gay. He therefore suggested that men cover their chests under penalty of the law. Chris most likely adapted this name due to some weird association he makes between muscles and sports.</blockquote>

;my two bolts and a heart

<blockquote>1. ''(idiom)'' Chris's opinion or takeaway on something.

<blockquote>''Okay. I get serious creep and dark vibrations from all of this. I mean, you may do as you will if it feels right with you. Just '''my two bolts and a heart'''.''<ref>[[April_2021_social_media_posts#Dark_vibrations]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's version of the idiomatic expression "my two cents", referencing his emoji signature "⚡️💙⚡️". Chris has also used a similar phrase before while roleplaying as Sonichu, shortening it to just "my two bolts."<ref>[[Sonichu reads and critiques a Fanfic by The Crimson Libertarian]]</ref></blockquote>

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== N ==
|-
|

;[[naïve]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' dumb, lacking intelligence.

<blockquote>''You are such a cowardly, '''naïve''', retarded, individual.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Calls_Out_Three_Na%C3%AFve_YouTubers</ref ></blockquote>

Origin: Chris only seems to understand the most simplified definition of the word. In general terms, the word "naïve" is defined as "showing a lack of experience, wisdom, or judgment."<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/naive</ref> However, in Chris's mind, the word is used to "question one's intelligence". Despite his distaste for the use of the word on him, this turns out to be a commonly used insult by Chris.</blockquote>

[[File:FRENCH-NAVY-CameraObscura.jpg|thumb|Chris travels to France]]
;navy
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' semen.

<blockquote>''You know that, uh—first off, uh, the one... with the '''navy''' being drunk. Yeah. Som—yeah. A b—a—i—a—it's a good idea somet—uhhh... it's a... it's a good idea. But, uh, you know, you don't have to do it if you don't like it, but, uh... I recycle my own semen''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Play on words, i.e, a navy is a collection of seamen/semen.

''See also: [[CWC-isms#C|Comeuppance]]''
</blockquote>

;nearly same
<blockquote>1. ''(Adjective)'' Similar.

<blockquote>''And so I killed about- killed about twenty miles round trip for gas to go find her house. But it turns out that was a troll posing as that girl. [sighs] THE VOICES SOUNDED '''NEARLY SAME'''.''<ref>[[For Chris]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;negligent

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[negligee]]

<blockquote>So, I went onto Adam & Eve's website, and ordered three garments, and a transparent robe. One of the '''negligent''' is about exactly on what I had drawn onto myself.<ref>[[WCT DMs#Sexy negligee]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An obvious mispelling of "negligee", a form of lingerie.

</blockquote>

;neurotypically hindered
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Lacking the proper mindset or intelligence to understand Chris' world building, just by being normal.

<blockquote>''Go ahead; that Is what happened that day, and they did not mind it much. To mock us makes you all Soo '''Neurotypically Hindered'''.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1203938198424035329</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes that the term "neurotypical" refers to having average brain function, rather than lacking any sort of [[Autism|autistic]] traits.<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1207129697752141824</ref> He believes that if one only possesses average intelligence, it makes it impossible for them to fully accept his fantasy world, thus claiming it as a "hindrance".

</blockquote>

;neutral
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' platonic.

<blockquote>''I apologize, but I meant the term '''neutrally''', and I never meant anything from that.''<ref>[[LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And One More thing, Darling!... Talluah Bankhead would be Insulted with your response to the term's '''neutral''' usage. Hmpf!'<ref>[[LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes words like "darling" and "dear", are gender neutral terms. Because of this, he assumes that if he claims that he used it in a "neutral" way, people will know he's not using the term in a romantic tone.

</blockquote>
<blockquote>2. ''(adjective)'' politically centrist or nonpartisan.

<blockquote>''He is a communist! And we do not like communists within this country! We are Republican, Democrat or ''' neutral'''... And I am '''neutral''', so I can go either way, but I do not exactly care much for communism!'<ref>[[Re-Calling Ahuvia]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Niggo|niggo]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An African-American person.

<blockquote>''Chris: [sighs, raises his voice] BILLY MAYS IS THE NEW MAYER OF CWCVILLE!</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Max: Yeah, and also say that "Christian Chandler will be thrown in jail!" CWCville Jail.''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Chris: And Christian Chandler will be thrown in CWCville Jail.''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Max: "Where he will be raped by a bunch of niggers!" Say this one really loud.''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Chris: Where he will be raped by a bunch of '''niggos'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Julie_Reveals_Herself</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A bastardization of the racial slur "nigger". This minced oath was used only once after [[BlueSpike]] persuaded Chris to say: "''BILLY MAYS is the new mayor of CWCville, and Christian Chandler will be thrown in CWCville jail, where he will be raped by a bunch of niggers''". Chris decided to repeat this phrase, but he also thought he could "outsmart" BlueSpike by replacing "niggers" with "niggos" in order to avoid saying the offending word directly. Ironically, a whole year after the incident, Chris referred to [[Surfshack Tito]] as a "nigger" [[Chris Drops the N-Bomb|several]] [[Surfshack Tito E-mails|times]], despite not even knowing what he looks like.</blockquote>

;No fucking shit / N.F.S.
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' obviously

<blockquote>''[[The WCT]]: Don't let [[Jacob Sockness|Jacob]] get close to you ever.''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Chris: '''No fucking shit'''.''<ref name=wctdms>[[WCT DMs]]</ref></blockquote>
<blockquote>''The WCT: The Sockness Saga will be something to watch when Geno gets there. ''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Chris: '''N.F.S.'''.''<ref name=wctdms></ref></blockquote>

Origin: Another instance of Chris attempting to add unnecessary emphasis onto his writing.</blockquote>

;[[Nombie-zazis|nombie-zazis]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' zombie nazis

<blockquote>''Anyway, as for the medical study, and this will require your aid, Magi-Chan. In June of 2015, the scientists have found the gene-like molecule which makes a person turn...ugh..'''nombie-zazis'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Son10revp3.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Replacement for homosexuals and homosexuality in the revised [[Sonichu 10]].</blockquote>

;not-troll
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a victim of trolling.

<blockquote>''Consider who does more harassing, which do you block? <ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-278#post-2549629]]</ref>
<blockquote>
*Every Foul-Mouth Troll
*The '''Not-Troll''' they follow</blockquote>''</blockquote>

Origin: In Chris's mind, only two types of people exist on [[the Internet]], those who are trolls, and those who are victims of trolling. Because the person being trolled is supposedly '''not''' a troll, they are a "not-troll". Chris eventually deleted the aforementioned post, and reposted it, replacing "not-troll" with "victim" to clarify what he was referring to in the first place.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-279</ref></blockquote>

;[[Noviophobia|noviophobia]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the fear that someone you want to date is already dating someone else.

<blockquote>''His one fault, that has restricted him from finding the Ms. Right, he had a major case of '''Noviophobia''', where he is afraid to even approach most ladies, because he thought that they were all already paired up with “A Jerk.”''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_News_Dash</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Because Chris was so frustrated with so many [[CWC-isms#J|jerks]] stealing his potential mates, Chris decided that his envy and hatred of men was a real phobia. Thus, overconfident in his ability to speak [[Spanish]], formed the word "noviophobia" by using the Spanish word ''novio'', meaning "boyfriend", and the English suffix, -phobia, meaning fear . </blockquote>
</blockquote>

|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== O ==
|-
|
;[[OC]]
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation, noun)'' Original Creator. A god or deity, including [[Chris and religion#Delusions of godhood|Chris himself]].

<blockquote>''I recall that there was a Mythos about me online: myself, Chris Chan, I; I was an '''OC''' in my own stories; was I Real in this “Reality” that is Dimension 1218? And then I was confirmed in late 2007 with that blurry photograph of me in a moment of great shock and stress.''<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(abbreviation, noun)'' Original Creation. A resident of a [[Reality Cartoon|cartoon dimension]]

<blockquote>''I am pleased to announce from this collab piece alone, we have ten Sonichu/Rosechu '''OCs''' confirmed for the OC Expansion Packs of our #TSSSF set of cards, and then some, as I’m also delegating with my other friends as well. This is going to be a massive and lovely OC party!''<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Short for ''original character'', a common term used by fanfiction authors for characters invented by themselves and used in their stories yet not present in the source material. Chris believes that fictional characters [[Chris and reality|really]] exist in other [[dimensions]], and under the [[Idea Guys]]' influence was convinced they are deserving of worship. Beginning with the Console Patron Units from ''[[Hyperdimension Neptunia]]'', he has since generalised this idea on his own.</blockquote>

;OH! MY AXELS! (or OW! MY AXELS!)
[[File:Axels2.jpg|thumb|right]]
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expression of pain in one's axles (the central shafts of rotating wheels or gears in a machine).

<blockquote>'''''OOOHHHHHH!!!! MY AXELS!!!!!'''''<ref>[[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Written for [[Ghostbusters|Ghost Buggy]]'s cameo in [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]], based upon the character's tendency to complain about its aching mechanical components.</blockquote>

;OH, MY CHRIS CHAN!
[[File:CWC GoPony reaction.jpg|thumb|150px|right]]
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Exclamation uttered by Chris during his phases of holding a [[messiah complex]] and [[role-play]]ing as [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]].

<blockquote>''Why the Hell would you read that personal shit about [[Chris|Mama]] with [[LoveYouLongTime E-mails, 2013-2014#Chris fucks himself|the penis thing]]? '''[[CPU Blue Heart|Oh, My Chris Chan]]!'''''<ref>[[Chris-Chan: A Comprehensive History]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Typed as a comment for the [[Chris-Chan: A Comprehensive History]] episode involving an embarrassing email.</blockquote>

;old-fashioned<blockquote>
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Holding a belief that may be considered politically incorrect.

<blockquote>''But still, call me '''old-fashioned''' but, I'd rather be- I would not- I'd uh- I'd definitely wouldn't uh... NOT BLACK. Not black.''<ref>[[Mumble_4]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''My father is '''OLD FASHIONED'''; he NEVER gives thought to homos, and he HATES them too.''<ref>[[IRC (03 January 2009)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to regard most traditional beliefs and rituals to be offensive to the general public.

2. ''(adjective)'' Dating back to the 1980s.

<blockquote>''Ah, you can tell this is an '''old-fashioned''' Lego set on account of this—the old-fashioned "LegoLand" on the corner.''<ref>[[Song of Christian]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to believe anything that's been made more than 5 years ago is as old as dirt.

3. ''(adjective)'' Preferring real women over waifus.
<blockquote>''Nothing against waifus and the people who have them, but I Never Really understood the appeal and concept of making out a character from a show who is Dimensions Away from your own league to be any sort of a significant other to you. I’m more '''old-fashioned''' towards real women.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/954587249622077440</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. However, Chris seemed to use this word like this because he's aware it isn't considered customary to be sexually attached to fictional characters over real people.

</blockquote>

;ounce of vagina

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Essentially Chris's way of saying "I'll at least lose my virginity at some point".

<blockquote>''And, as for you, Jason Kendrick Howell… as sure as I am to get at least one '''ounce of vagina''', I have your number, and you're going down!''<ref>[[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Obviously confused when it comes to both euphemisms and basic units of measure, Chris has stated that he is sure to get "at least one ounce of vagina" within his lifetime.<ref>[[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)]]</ref> In the years since, he's gotten at least [[Mia Hamm|two]] [[Barbara Chandler|ounces]].
</blockquote>
;outercourse
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the act of stimulating someone else's genitals.

<blockquote>''I understand. You may or may not have had much exposure to sexual images as I've had, so the idea of a "hand job" (which was the act drawn there) as part of '''outtercourse''''' [sic]'' (versus intercourse) was a surprise to you.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Megan_emails,_2008#Chris_thinks_she_was_scarred_because_she_doesn.27t_know_much_about_sex</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The word "outercourse" is actually another way to refer to dry humping.<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/outercourse</ref> In Chris's mind however, outercourse simply refers to sex which involves touching another's genitals, because the action happen outside of the body.</blockquote>

;overinexperienced
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Being overly inexperienced.

<blockquote>''My Body is sexually overinexperienced, and Starved.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/May_2020_social_media_posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: It apparently didn't occur to Chris that sexual inexperience isn't the least bit comparative, at least not in the context where he intended to use this word.
</blockquote>

;overpowered (or OP)
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' A disproportionate amount of strength, which is worn as a badge of honor.

<blockquote>''If I was a neuro-typical mind, as opposed to '''overpowered''' psychic, I’d have gotten dizzy. ''<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A term normally meant to refer to imbalance in game mechanics. Chris adopted the term at some point during or after the [[Idea Guys]] saga as a way to brag about his nonexistent psychic abilities and ludicrously powerful fictional characters.</blockquote>

{{clear}}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== P ==
|-
|

;parkay
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' an epic style of running

<blockquote>''Hello there, fans! It's Christian Chandler here, live at the downtown mall, where for the Sonichu franchise and city of CWCville, and everything like that, I'm gonna do a '''parkay''' from this point all the way down to the gara--parking garage where, at the end, we will get a nice view of the tent-style theater that's down there where events are held.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_Edge</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In the video [[Sonichu's Edge]], Chris calls his style of running "parkay". Chris confused his running as a form of parkour, an acrobatic sport typically used in the military as a means of practicing the navigation of a complex environment without the use of equipment. <ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parkour</ref>. Given Chris's [[speech impediment]], the word "parkour" somehow came out as "parkay".
</blockquote>

;[[Parody|parody]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any work that "borrows" characters, plots, or styles from other pieces of fiction, whether infringing International [[Chris and copyright|Copyright]] Law or otherwise.

<blockquote>''Any names, or persons, illustrated in any of the Sonichu Comics, except that of Christian Weston Chandler, that may seem similar to anyone in real life, are purely coincidental, or otherwise '''parodic'''.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=File:Issue_8_Cover.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's understanding of what constitutes as a parody most likely comes from his interest in shows like [[Family Guy]] and [[Excel Saga]], the former of which use copyrighted characters to make jokes around them, and the latter of which parodied various clichés found in anime. In his mind, because those shows can get away with using such characters and scenes, that gives him an excuse to do the same thing in his comics as long as he states it's being done as a "parody". Ironically, Whenever Chris spoted an actual parody, he thought that the characters from the original work were being defaced.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Parody#Chris_does_not_understand_the_concept_of_parody</ref></blockquote>

;peanut
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Someone who disregards you, or otherwise does not accept you for who you are.

<blockquote>''So you enjoy it, just do it—don't worry about other people's opi—pinions. Because, uh, compared to the other schools, those people who disregard you are just total '''peanuts'''. And I'm not talkin' Charlie Brown; I'm talkin' 'bout the little nuts after the shells. The real peanut gallery. That would be peanuts, wouldn't it?''<ref>[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Apparently derived from "[[Wikipedia:peanut gallery|peanut gallery]]," a term used to describe the hecklers in an vaudeville audience who would throw peanuts at a performer. Chris's own spin on this concept is to dismiss such hecklers as being insignificant like literal peanuts.
</blockquote>

;[[Pedofork|pedofork]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A pedophile.

<blockquote>''I am not a '''pedofork''', you DORKS!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC%27s_Second_Message</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Created as a half-assed attempt to make "pedophile" rhyme with dork. Coined in Chris's [[Madman Rising]] video, in response to the trolls who were comparing him to [[wikipedia:Herbert_(Family_Guy)| Herbert the Pervert]] from ''Family Guy''.</blockquote>

;[[Pickle|pickle]]
[[File:Pickle Rick.jpg|right|thumb|Chris bought this back in 2018. The brine-soaked irony!]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A penis, particularly one of [[JERKS|any man that isn't Chris]].

<blockquote>''Do me a favor, draw a VAGINA on my Rosechu, Rosechu IS A GIRL; SHE NEVER HAD A FREAKIN' '''PICKLE'''!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Chrisreply3.PNG</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The word "pickle" is one of the few hundred slang words for the word "penis".<ref>https://web.stanford.edu/~eckert/PDF/PenisTesticlesSlang.pdf</ref> It is unknown why Chris prefers to refer to the penises of other men as "pickles", while he calls his own his "duck", but it may have to do with Chris's sexual insecurity and the fact that he legitimately hates actual pickles <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_4#Why_Chris_hates_pickles</ref>, whereas Chris thinks he's special enough to have a cutesy name for his own penis.</blockquote>

;Pfalm
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The act of placing your palm over someone's face or the camera, as if it's the viewer's face.

<blockquote>''Why don’t you tell that to [[Emgo]] before you judge yourself once again for that which you are (mis)judging me of. #BeGeekBeProud #PFALM.''<ref>[[January_2024_social_media_posts#Emgo_and_PFALM]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: According to Chris, it comes from the phrase "palm in your face", combining the words "palm" and "face".<ref>[[CWC_Blog_(Cwclight)#Random_Thoughts_(will_be_updated_from_time_to_time)]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;[[Pmurt]]

<blockquote>1. ''(proper noun)'' The 45th and 47th president of the United States: Donald Trump.

<blockquote>''EID '''PMURT''' EID!!!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Eid,_Pmurt,_Eid</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Donald Trump's last name, but spelled backwards. In Chris's first usage of this CWC-ism, Chris mentioned how "Trump spelled backward is "Pmurt", which sounds like "hurt".<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/September_2016_Facebook_posts#Registered_to_vote</ref>
Due to Chris's strong hatred for Trump, he frequently referred to Trump as Pmurt- believing that the spoken word of a backwards name has the power to degrade and weaken a person.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/U8C43P2A37A8_y_U8C1N023V0L</ref>. In Chris's eyes, if he repeated the word again and again, everyone would turn against Trump and start voting for [[Wikipedia:Hillary Clinton|Hillary]]. Unsurprisingly, Chris had no sway over the election aside from his own vote.
</blockquote>

;point at your snout and oink
<blockquote>1. ''(verb phrase)'' Do something humiliating to yourself.

<blockquote>''You both want me to even Beg, you can go '''point at your own damn snouts and Oink''' like Eric Cartman, and then [[Rape]] yourselves with your own Damn [[Star Wars|Darth Maul]] [[Sex toys|Dual LightSabre]].''<ref>[[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A reference to a scene in the ''[[South Park]]'' episode "{{w|Scott Tenorman Must Die}}", where Scott makes Eric Cartman embarass himself by singing a song about being a "little piggy". Chris said this to [[Clyde Cash]] and [[Surfshack Tito]] upon failing to receive a cash bounty for destroying his own [[PlayStation 3]].
</blockquote>

;poke
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Marijuana.

<blockquote>''Anyway, eclectic! High on the hedge and high on the hog. You want some of this '''poke''', mon?<ref>[[CWC address to Royal Board]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Intended as a demonstration of what "Soni-Chew the Eclectic Heeedge Hog Poke Mon of London, England" would sound like. A coded reference to Pokémon, and may or may not be a play on the verb "toke".
</blockquote>

;[[Polyamorous marriage|polyamorous]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Polygamous.

<blockquote>''I go'' [sic] ''married to Magi-Chan Sonichu and Cryzel Rosechu last March, and then I married Sylvana Rosechu and Mewtwo last June. We all share a '''polyamorous''' relationship.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Miss_Cherry_asks_Chris_about_his_marriages.png</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An etymologically malformed neologism from the 1970's for having multiple romantic or sexual relations at once, misapplied by Chris. </blockquote>

;prawns
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Subordinates or helpers, often those wittingly or unwittingly aiding a sinister character.

<blockquote>''You keep sending out your '''prawns''' to do your dirty work, you coward.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Chris%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica#15_May</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris almost certainly meant to type "pawns" here. </blockquote>

;[[Prickly-Wicklies|prickly-wicklies]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Punishments given for insulting or harming Chris.

<blockquote>''War gets you '''prickly-wicklies'''... as well as punches.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/A_Warm_Fuzzy_Tale</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Refer to ''Fuzzy-Wuzzies''.

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#F|fuzzy-wuzzies]]

</blockquote>

;[[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens]]
[[Image:PVCCitizens.jpg|thumb]]
<blockquote>1. ''(backronym)'' The headquarters of several Sonichu villains.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: The name itself is a backronym of the college Chris attended, [[PVCC|the Piedmont Virginia Community College]]. After experiencing several mishaps throughout his college experience<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College#Kicked_out_of_English</ref><ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College#Kicked_out_of_college</ref>, the dean giving him the cold hard truth about why his [[Love Quest]] is doomed to fail became the straw that broke the camel's back, and Chris thought it would be a smart idea to deface the college afterward in his comics.</blockquote>

;prowldent
<blockquote>1. ''(???)'' Unknown.

<blockquote>There's no quote to cite this from, just a logo in which Chris gives the name "Prowldent Virginia Community College" to [[PVCC]].<ref>[[:File:ProwldentVCC.jpg]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Likely combining connotations of "prowl" and "dent" (either to leave an indentation or [[fangs|teeth]]).
</blockquote>

;Pu Tuhs!
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Shut Up!

<blockquote>''SHE; my Ariel Starter was Female from the start, so '''Pu Tuhs!'''''<ref>[[December 2016 Facebook posts#Favorite Pokemon]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: "Shut up" backwards. Because it is backwards, Chris thinks it is more debasing than the normal version of the phrase.
</blockquote>

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Q ==
|-
|

;q-sand
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' Short for quarter sandwich (i.e. a quarter of a sandwich).

<blockquote>
''So, mom ignored her and ate the '''q-sand''' in front of her.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 31]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Appeared in an [[Jackie E-mails 31|e-mail]] sent to [[Jackie]] dated August 5, 2011. Most likely unnecessarily used as a [[Sonic the Hedgehog|way past cool]] abbreviation.
</blockquote>

;quarters
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An office space; headquarters.

<blockquote>''Then that B-Dog ripped up my notes and all, dragged me to her '''quarters''' and talked down to me very RUDELY AND HOARSELY.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris%27s_Wikipedia_profile</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Whenever Chris says that he's being brought to someone's office, he always refers to it as their "quarters", as if he was being brought to some kind of evil hideout. This could be to add unnecessary dramatic effect to his stories.

2. ''(noun, pl.)'' coins, no matter their origin or worth.

<blockquote>''Uhh. I want a soda, but it takes only C '''quarters''' and I only have W quarters. Do you have any change?''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_9_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The first time this word was used like this was in [[Sonichu 9]], where it is revealed that [[CWCville]] issues its currency in the form of "C-quarters" and "W-quarters". According to this issue, 10 C-quarters, make up a single W-quarter, which ultimately defeats the whole concept of the "quarter" coin. Despite being a part of the United States, CWC-ville still issues this strange form of currency, along with US dollars. Because of this, Chris likely decided to refer to his currency as "quarters" so that it could technically count as US currency.</blockquote>

;quite
<blockquote>1. ''(exclamation)'' A fancy replacement of the word "right" or "correct".

<blockquote>''Arthur: Magi-Chan, it's because of his-- you know, he wants to help all of his friends, and with his ability to contact them all simultaenously at the same time, it's an amazing ability to have.</blockquote>

<blockquote>''Chris: '''Quite''', he is the psychic type, after all.''<ref>[[CatKnight Interview]'']</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adverb)'' to the utmost or most absolute extent or degree; absolutely; completely.

<blockquote> ''Hm. Not enough to, uhh... Well, he knows quite-- he can see '''quite''' a bit far into the future, but although there are details of which you might not be able to see, a point or two.'' <ref>[[CatKnight Interview]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''For a hundred dollars? Th-that's, that's '''quite''', that's uh, it'd take more funds for me to, more funds than that for me to be able to acquire the material figures...''<ref>[[CatKnight Interview]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris infamously used this word, along with "indeed" ad nauseam in his interview with [[Arthur Spatchcock]], believing that doing so is essentially the same as speaking his language, British if you will.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== R ==
|-
|

;raincoat
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a condom.

<blockquote>''You ARE the woman...we gotta stop by [[Wal-Mart|Wall-Mall-Wart]] on the way for a "'''raincoat'''".''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_7_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The term "raincoat" is actually an archaic slang term for the word "condom".<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/raincoat</ref> Given that Chris has been raised by two geezers his whole life, and that part of his childhood has consisted of [[Gilligan's Island|old TV shows]], Chris thought that people would understand what he meant when he states that his Mary Sues are having protected sex with a raincoat.</blockquote>

;[[random-access humor]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' non-sequitur.

<blockquote>''Punchy grew up in a dojo, where he perfected his punches. He is also full of '''random-access humor'''. He lost his tail in a brutal fight.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP5.htm</ref></blockquote>

Origin: According to Chris, his brain is completely random, and it always spews out incoherent garbage. In his mind, this works in the same way a computer processes random-access memory.<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref>

</blockquote>

;rapier
[[File:ReldnahcTheRapier .jpg|thumb|Reldnahc the Rapier]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun, attributive)'' rapist, sexual assailant.

<blockquote>
''Now! My '''rapier''' friend, I would very much like you to get off me, please.''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/sonichu-12-pages-54-60.33547/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris-Chan Sonichu calls [[Reldnahc_Notsew_Naitsirhc#Fictional_biography|Reldnahc Ha-Taque]] his "rapier friend" in [[Sonichu 12|Sonichu #12]] after Reldnahc tackles him to the ground in a suggestive pose and touches his chest, thus (in Chris's hyperbolic mind) "raping" him. As a double double entendre, he could also be using the externally attested definition, as an adjective meaning "witty",<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/rapier#Adjective</ref> and metaphorically referring to a kind of thin, sharp-pointed sword. This is incredibly unlikely due to Chris's basic understanding of the English language, and he most likely didn't know "rapist" is the term for one who rapes, not raper or rapier.
</blockquote>

;reality cartoon

<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' The universe.

<blockquote>
''Life is a cartoon; we are all the characters of the larger; the cartoons we make are part of our own universe; we're all a '''reality cartoon'''.''<ref>August 2017 tweets#"Life is a cartoon"</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Since Chris's life revolves mainly around [[Vidya]] and cartoons, it would make sense to him that the most believable explanation for the universe and everything in it is that it's all a cartoon. Likely related to Chris's known belief that [[Chris_and_reality#Fictional_characters_and_media|all fiction actually exists in alternate universes]]. Chris' interactions with the [[Idea Guys]] made this idea seem even more plausible to him.
</blockquote>

;[[recycling]]

<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' the act of one ingesting their own semen to preserve their sperm count.

<blockquote> I '''recycle''' my own semen, because, uh, you know, yes I do masturbate.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Captain%27s_Log,_Stardate_April_28th,_2009</ref> </blockquote>

Origin: Chris, having very little knowledge of how the male reproductive system works, thinks that men can run out of sperm from masturbating or orgasming too much. Fearing the loss of "potential children", Chris actually thinks that by ingesting the sperm back into his body, his sperm count will stay in balance, thus, he is "recycling" it.

</blockquote>

;reeb
[[Image:4centgarbagereeb.jpg|thumb|Glug! Glug! Glug!]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' beer or any other alcoholic beverage of the like.

<blockquote>''Then he glugs his '''reeb''', heh-heh, and then he conks out.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_8_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, thinking he's so [[Slow-in-the-minds|clever]], decided to censor any mention of the word "beer" in his comics, by spelling the word backward.</blockquote>

;Resident-Evil refrigerator

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The refrigerator in the previous Chandler Household.

<blockquote>''Kitchen very much blocked off all over... with the '''Resident Evil refrigerator''' right there.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Tour_of_Chris%27s_House_II</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris refers to the fridge as the "Resident Evil" kind, because in Japan, the game ''Resident Evil'' is known as ''Biohazard''.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Tour_of_Chris%27s_House_II</ref><ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Resident_Evil</ref> Considering the quality of the household, that name may very well fit the description of the fridge in the state it was in before filming the [[Tour of Chris's House II|Second House Tour]].</blockquote>

;romps in the hay

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' sexual intercourse

<blockquote>''This page, by the way, was drawn before last March, so stuff Has Happened since then, it is all good. Go ahead and Muck It Up in your heads, Trolls; I Am BiSexual, and I Laugh at your Jokes. (Awesome Romps in the hay with him, as well as Cryzel)''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/July_2018_social_media_posts#BronyCon_thoughts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris has used this term since at least 2018.
</blockquote>

;[[Rosechu (species)|Rosechu]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The female counterpart of the [[Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon]].</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: Derived from the appropriately named first Rosechu of CWCville, [[Rosechu]]. The name of the species is a portmanteau of the last name of the ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog]]'' character, Amy Rose, and "Raichu", the evolved form of a Pikachu.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== S ==
|-
|

;[[saga]]
<blockquote>1 ''(noun)'' An ongoing event within Chris' life.

<blockquote>''A Sonichu Special: CWC's Love Quest '''Saga'''''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris was actually the first to use the term "saga" as Christorians know it today, using it as such when describing his Love Quest on the cover of [[Sonichu 4]]. It wasn't until the Miyamota Saga when the term was used by Christorians to describe ongoing events in Chris' life as we know it.</blockquote>

;salty
<blockquote>1 ''(adjective)'' showing more maturity or coarseness than is expected, especially knowledge of [[honest]] topics like [[Chris and sex|sex]].

<blockquote>''Ah, but I am not the weak person they think I am; I am much, much '''saltier'''!''<ref>[[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu'' #4]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Based upon a line from "Bowling Girls", ninth episode of ''[[Excel Saga]]'': "But I'm not the sweet little girl I was a few minutes ago! I'm much, much saltier now!" "Salty" in this context derives from naval lingo, since the most experienced sailors would have greater exposure to both the saltwater seas and worldly experiences.
</blockquote>

;[[Scale of Respect|scale of respect]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's way of measuring his respect for other people.

<blockquote>''I'll consider knocking you and Susan up my '''Scale of Respect''' each by 2 points''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Scale_of_Respect</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, like most other autistics, tends to view the world based on numerical values due to their lack of understanding of certain abstract concepts such as respect. Because of this, Chris made his very own numerical scale to decide on who should be respected, compared to who shouldn't.</blockquote>

;seinor
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Misspelling of senior.

<blockquote>''A cool Junior or '''Seinor'''-Year student, and follow their example on asking others out''<ref>[[CWC Blog]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An example of how the “i before e rule” escapes Chris.

</blockquote>

;self-epic
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' describing a situation which is epic, and at the same time related to Chris and his various clones.

<blockquote>''And I will square-off in the TRULY '''SELF-EPIC''' Battle between me, and my Dark Half.''<ref>[[An Important Update]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: [[Chris and his Ego|Self-explanatory]].</blockquote>
</blockquote>

;self-masturbation
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[Mass debating|masturbation]].

<blockquote>'''''Self-masturbation''' is really arduous and annoying.''<ref name=15min>[[Masturbation discussions]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris decided to add the prefix "self-" to make it clear that he was stroking his own [[duck]], apparently unaware that use of said prefix is redundant (the term masturbation typically implies self-pleasure unless one specifies otherwise).</blockquote>
</blockquote>

;self-sexually active
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' in the habit of [[Mass debating|masturbating]].

<blockquote>''And Another Thing, yes, I will admit I was '''self-sexually active'''; WAS. You all turned me off of Sex LONG Before I even thought of coming out as Trans in ‘14.''<ref>[[February 2020 social media posts#On seeing his father's penis]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A modification of "sexually active".</blockquote>
</blockquote>

;ship
[[File:Chillaxingcard.jpg|200px|thumb|An example of a "shipping".]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An act of two or more OCs interacting with or performing any given action towards one another, regardless of any romantic feelings.

<blockquote>''You must take a Pony card from the grid and reattach it elsewhere with this '''Ship'''. That card's power activates. At the end of the turn, until the Pony card attached with this '''Ship''' is discarded of removed from the grid, it gains the Keyword Villain.''<ref>[https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:EpicOnlineBully.jpeg]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An abbreviation of the word "relationship". Chris learned the term from the card game ''[[Twilight Sparkle's Secret Shipfic Folder]]'', a My Little Pony fan game satirizing the popular internet trend of shipping. He used the game as another creative medium to sell items to fans, trolls, weens, and enablers.</blockquote>
</blockquote>

;shitful
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' hurtful; defamitory.

<blockquote>''And this is the last time I will ever say anything in response to your '''shitful''' and hurtful comments and hatred for Hate's Sake!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2014_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Shitful is a vulgar slang word, synonymous with words like "boat-load" or "truck-load". Chris may have seen the "shit" part of this word and assumed that it was a more profane version of "hateful". Disregarding its actual meaning, the word to Chris is used for situations that seem "shitty" to him.</blockquote>

;[[SLGBTQ]]

<blockquote>1. ''(acronym)'' an extended acronym for LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender) which includes "straights" and "questioning people".

<blockquote>''Considering your logo there, Texas will be feeling more love from the '''SLGBTQ''' community; give us props and Love, Lone Star State.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/September_2017_tweets#Hurricane_Harvey_and_SLGBT</ref></blockquote>

Origin: When Chris first used this acronym, he didn't explain what groups the "S" or "Q" were supposed to represent, making plenty of people confused. Eventually, Chris revealed that the "S" represents '''s'''traight and cis-gender people, while "Q" represents "'''q'''ueers" or "'''q'''uestioning people". Chris believes that if he included straight people into LGBT, then those particular people would feel more invited to join into the community. Considering the fact that gay people are minorities, adding the "S" to LGBT only defeats the entire purpose of identifying people as LGBT in the first place.</blockquote>

;[[Slow-in-the-minds|slow-in-the-mind]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a mentally handicapped person

<blockquote>''And finally, after a hard "odd" day, he rides home on a bus, but unfortunately, it had a few "'''slow-in-the-minds'''" on it.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/A_Week_With_Christian_Chandler></ref></blockquote>

Origin: While the exact origin of the term is unknown, slow-in-the-minds was first used by Chris in a high school assignment.<ref>[[Manchester High Leaks#Help This Unborn Child]]</ref> "Slow-in-the-minds" works as a stand in for the less-socially-acceptable "retard", so it's possible that Chris created this CWC-ism in order to self-censor.

</blockquote>

;slow-minded

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' mentally retarded

<blockquote>''As for what had happened during PVCC, in a nutshell; about Mid-Summer, 2003, I've realize upon revolation that I needed a girl friend to make into a Sweetheart from the Ground-Up, so with a sign (which I've later realized that it made me look '''slow-minded'''; the "R" Word), I've started my Enduring Love Quest.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_emails_2007#February</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''OK, I can definitely name you a few reasons, like there was this one [stutters] …there was this one '''slow-minded''' individual named Tony. He was like as big as-he was as big and strong as an ox. He just kept on making all the moanings and noises and whatnot, and he sometimes even-even-a couple of times he even spat on me, and he even bopped me on the back of the head once or twice during the whole-during the whole time I knew him there.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Kacey_Call_9</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' stupid, but not quite retarded

<blockquote> ''I'll admit I have had some '''slow-minded''' moments. But I am certainly not totally retarded.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call#Crossing_the_Na.C3.AFve_Line_.281:46:21-1:52:36.29</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;SNERGEN FLERGEN!!!
[[Image:SNERGEN FLERGEN!.PNG|thumb|200px]]
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' A phrase one may shout out when asked for attendance.

<blockquote>'''''SNERGEN FLERGEN!!!'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic9P6.jpg</ref>
''-What?''

''Uh...here!''
</blockquote>

Origin: An obvious example of Chris's [[CWC-isms#R|random-access humor]]. This weird phrase appeared in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], when the cast was asked for their attendance during a [[CWC-isms#D|Dating Education]] class. When [[Wild Sonichu]] was asked for his attendance, he blurted out this phrase as Chris's many attempts to be funny in his comics. Given Chris's childish sense of humor, it would make a whole lot of sense for him to include a character randomly blurt out a nonsensical phrase out of nowhere.</blockquote>

;snooze cruise
<blockquote>1. a long period of slumber

<blockquote> ''Next, he had Trigonometry...I'd hate to be Christian when his nerves kicked into action after waking up from a "notey" '''snooze cruise''', but I was.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/A_Week_With_Christian_Chandler</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from ''[[Wikipedia:Sonic Adventure|Sonic Adventure]]''.

</blockquote>

;somecummpentydifferent
<blockquote>1. ''(Phrase)'' Used to announce a change in subject.

<blockquote>''Anyway and now for somecummpentydifferent stay tuned for '''somecummpentydifferent''' — a bunch of good pushups!''<ref>[[Getting Foam Ed]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(Phrase)'' Used to announce use of [[random-access humor]].

<blockquote>''And now for '''somecummpentydifferent'''. BUUUUNG! And now it's Monty Python's flying elephants. Du tu du tu du tu du. Du tu du tu du tu du. Johan, why is people running away? I don't know, Greeg, why is people running away.''<ref>[[CWCFlyingElephants]]. Note this is the very first thing he says, so there's nothing to be completely different ''from''.</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris is trying to say "And now for something completely different" like John Cleese does on [[Monty Python]]. Suffice to say Cleese's ability to say three multisyllabic words in rapid succession exceeds that of Chris.</blockquote>

;[[Tobacky|somkey]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' The quality of having smoked recreationally, be it tobacco, marijuana, or some other substance.

<blockquote>''Thank our mayor, Mr. Christian Weston Chandler that CWCville is a clean city; nobody has to go home drunk or '''somkey'''!''<ref>[[Sonichu 8]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A simple corruption of the word 'Smokey', used by [[Jamsta Sonichu]] and [[Lolisa Rosechu]] during their report on [[Sonichu 8#Spring Break, 2008!|Spring Break, 2008!]].
</blockquote>

;[[Sonichu (species)|Sonichu]]
<blockquote>1. (noun) The male counterpart of the Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: Derived from the appropriately named first Sonichu of CWCville, Sonichu. The name of the species is a portmanteau of the name of the titular character of ''Sonic the Hedgehog'', Sonic, and "Pikachu".</blockquote>

;soo
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' Very, Very much.

<blockquote>''Dear Blanca, I am '''soo''' happy that you were revealed as my True, Honest Sweetheart-To-Be''<ref>[[Chris's Letter to Blanca]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In writing, Chris often adds extra o's to the word "so" to prolong the "o" sound and show added emphasis. This has the (unintentional?) effect of mimicking the speech patterns of a Valley Girl or an effeminate homosexual. However, where most people would add two or more o's, (e.g., "I love you sooo much!"), Chris frequently only adds one, resulting in "soo," which makes the word look like it's supposed to be pronounced "sue".

This may originate from pamphlets published by [http://www.channing-bete.com/ Channing Bete], [[Autism|short and uninformative]] self-help pamphlets often handed out at churches, the last page of which often feature a summary headlined by "Soo…" Given his distrust of help from anyone other than [[Rocky]], it is not entirely impossible that Chris has read Channing Bete pamphlets occasionally.

This is one of many recurring jokes in the [[Sonichu Audiobooks]] in which the narrator pronounces words like "soo" as they are literally spelled, instead of how Chris intended them to be read.
</blockquote>

;soul-bonding
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Sexual intercourse as a means of purifying someone.

<blockquote>What had happened was Literally a Divine Mission, commissioned to Christine and I by Emanuel (GOD above Gods), herself, to Heal and Cleanse Barbara's health and soul and being and Clear her of remaining sins and regrets through Coddling, Talking, and Supportive '''Soul Bonding''' to mainly Extend her Life, personally by Divine Intervention.<ref>[[Jail Letter - 4 October 2021]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris has somehow come under the delusion that having sex with his mother would "purify" her, and extend her lifetime, all through the act of bonding each other's souls.

</blockquote>

;soup beds
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Homeless shelter with beds

<blockquote>'' I mean, we have soup kitchens and we have '''soup beds'''. We should really combine the two into SOUP HOTELS!''<ref>[[A Public Announcement for Congress]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris tries to distill his "soup hotel" idea into its two components, but he mangles one of them by retaining the "soup" prefix.
</blockquote>

;sourdough region
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The crotch area

<blockquote>''Its weak point is still the '''sourdough region''', but it would take FIVE KICKS to get to it''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_4_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In his Sonichu comics, Chris has decided to make the main weakness of the jerkops their crotch. The weakest of the jerkops take only one kick to be taken down, while higher-ranking jerkops, such as [[Jerkhief]] take five. The reason why Chris refers to this spot as the "sourdough region" is unknown, but most of his other CWC-isms already tend to sound so nonsensical to begin with, it barely even matters.</blockquote>

;spike on one's shoulder
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' refers to the act of holding grievances towards someone.

<blockquote>''There was a whole bunch of misunderstandings between me and my employer, and he had a '''spike on his shoulder''' against me.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A confusion with the phrase "chip on one's shoulder".</blockquote>

;spot
<blockquote> 1. ''(noun)'' A small amount.

<blockquote>''the recent 43.98 purchase was actually a ''spot'' of Wheeling and Dealing I did; I actually spent less to make a profit.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jackie_E-mails_15</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris likes to retardedly incorporate British English into his sentences when he has the chance, possibly to sound more classy than he actually is. The phrase "A spot of X" is a British English idiom referring to a small amount of something.</blockquote>

;sticky dream
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A wet dream

<blockquote>''After falling back asleep Chris had a "'''sticky dream'''."''<ref>[[Ivy Q&A]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris claims that a "wet dream" actually refers to wetting one's bed as opposed to nocturnal emission.
</blockquote>

;straight path
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The quality of being heterosexual and cisgender

<blockquote>''And, besides, if you stray away from the '''straight path''', it can really jeopardize the entire future of the world and the human race.<ref>[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]]''</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Before the [[Tomgirl Saga]], Chris had an intense fear of "falling off the straight path". When he states this, he is essentially referring to being on the path to straightness, in the same way a normal person would refer to someone being on the path to success. Chris also had this unrealistic idea that being in contact with gay men would suddenly make him gay too, which would therefore make him fall off the path. Possibly also an allusion to the phrase "straight and narrow" and/or the Biblical passage Matthew 7:14: "Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it."</blockquote>

</blockquote>
;[[Sub-Episodes|sub-episode]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The side stories in the [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]] comics.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: A result of Chris' use of [[Chris and English#Television jargon|television jargon]] in his comics.</blockquote>

;sumbah
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Minced oath for "son of a bitch."

<blockquote>''Yo, Christian, thanks for saving my sister from that crazy '''sumbah'''''<ref>[[Sonichu Special 4]], page K-4</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Probably based upon "sumbitch."
</blockquote>

;[[Sweetbolt|sweetbolt]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A pet name used by [[CWC-isms#E|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]].

<blockquote>''Ahh..that salad was great! What's wrong '''sweetbolt'''?''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP11.htm</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' A sweetheart.

<blockquote>''I understand, and I will NEVER put it against you. Yes, as your '''SweetBolt'''. :)?''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP11.htm</ref></blockquote>

Origin: When Chris first worked on his Sonichu comics, he tried to incorporate as many references to electricity as he can, in order to match with the Pikachu part of the titular character. A portmanteau of the CWC-ism "sweetheart" and "bolt".
</blockquote>

;[[Sweetheart|sweetheart]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A potential lover.

<blockquote>''Oh, gee, I'm sorry Bionic, but back then I was na- I was naive on dating and all that, so I just didn't think of it at the time. But if you a '''sweetheart''', Meg has created quite a few foxy characters. If she's cool with it, you could go out with one of them.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_6_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Another cutesy pet name given to candidates of his Love Quest.</blockquote>

;[[Sweetheart from the Ground-Up|sweetheart from the ground-up]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An ideal sweetheart beyond the friend zone.

<blockquote>''For days to weeks to months to years, I Felt So Lonesome and Incomplete. But I didn't STOP! In the name of Love, and the fact that there had to be a Boyfriend-Free Girl out there, somewhere, for me to get to know, grow a strong companionship with and make into a '''Sweetheart from the Ground-Up''', so in later years, after the inevitability of my parents leaving me, I WON'T BE ALONE. And I can eventually realize my dream of being a good husband, and father of a pretty girl named Crystal.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days</ref></blockquote>

Origin: As stated, Chris intended to use this weird phrase to indicate that he wants an ideal gal-pal well beyond the friend zone. Chris thought this phrase sounded so clever, that he used it constantly.</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== T ==
|-
|

;teenages

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The 13-19 age group; teenage years.

<blockquote>''Ahem... hello, ladies and gentlemen, girls and boys, and dudes of all '''teenages''', as well as the, uh, gals.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In Chris's [[Future Message]], he attempts to talk down to just about every age group. In order to do this, he starts his video off with the quote above. Chris clearly couldn't think of a way to refer to teenagers, so he decided to refer to such people by "teenages". A butchering of "people of all ages".</blockquote>

;teir
[[File:Teir.png|thumb|200|Chris spelling tier wrong.]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Misspelling of tier.

<blockquote>''$1 '''Teir'''''<ref>[[Patreon]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Yet another example of how Chris is unaware of “i before e”. In a June 2019 update, he managed to spell tier wrong throughout multiple descriptions, despite the correctly-spelled word being visible right on the page.</blockquote>

;telekinesis

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Telepathy, i.e. communication through long distances, usually via psychic or supernatural means.

<blockquote>''I’ve been communicating with her through '''telekinesis''', and she sounded very lonesome.''<ref>[[Silvana]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Whereas tele'''kine'''sis means ''moving'' objects from a distance with psychic powers (c.f. ''[[wikipedia:kinetic energy|kinetic]]''), Chris has never used the term properly. [[Magi-Chan|Psychic]] [[Silvana|characters]] in the [[comic]] have both powers of telekinesis and telepathy, but Chris has only used the former to refer to both.
</blockquote>

;Temple

<blockquote>1. [[14 Branchland Court|Chris's house]].
<blockquote>''Food for Barbara is also appreciated, and Visitors who personally offer genuine Kindness and Good Intentions are all encouraged to visit the '''Temple'''.''<ref>[[Jail Letter - 4 October 2021]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In [[2019]] Chris designated his house as the "Temple of CWC Sonichu" due to his growing [[Messiah complex]].
</blockquote>

;That was a straw that sold the blade to the executioner

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' That was the final straw.

<blockquote>''And on top of that, literally doxing someone on [[Kiwi Farms|Kiwi]], because someone has a hold over [[Bismuth|Naught]] to the point of him having to feel very insecure about himself. And the topper, in my eyes, one of y'all sent threats to [[Praetor|Anni]]. Fortunately, she completely missed and overlooked that memo in her inbox. '''That was a straw that sold the blade to the executioner'''.''<ref>[[MKR DMs]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used the phrase in listing his grievances against some members of the [[Watchmen]].
</blockquote>

;theoretical ex

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' One of the trolls who posed as a potential love interest for Chris during the classic period of trolling, between 2008 and 2011; a catfish, generally-speaking.

<blockquote>''Yeah, it’s like, you know, even when I try to make a new relationship, uh, especially among the '''theoretical rex-, exes''' I had, I still could not tell which was which…''<ref>[[Catie Date Conversation Transcript#Chris's history with the trolls]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris started calling the trolls who pretended to be his girlfriends during the classic era "theoretical exes" around the time of his date with [[Catherine|Catie]]. When pressed by Cousin Al as to what he meant, he cited that people may not always be who they say they are on the Internet.
</blockquote>

;This Viral Event

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The worldwide Coronavirus ([[COVID-19]], SARS-CoV-2) outbreak in early [[2020]], which began in [[China]] on New Year's Eve [[2019]] and has since become the most severe pandemic since the Spanish flu of 1918. Regarded by Chris as a trivial excuse to cancel a perfectly good ''[[My Little Pony]]'' convention.

<blockquote>''The Bottom Line is that '''This Viral Event''' is actually a better step in our own developments and evolution, as well as a deity-level test to sort out the weak from the moderate and strong of mental and soulful intervals, and nothing else.<ref>[[March 2020 social media posts#Chris finally weighs in on the coronavirus pandemic]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's [[Chris and religion|theodicy]] assigns any misfortune in the world to the Dimensional Merge. As the disease's spread has caused many governments to forbid large gatherings as a sanitary measure, it has become a [[Chris and His Ego|personal inconvenience to Chris]]. He believes that the pandemic will soon be stopped by [[OC|fictional characters]]' efforts,<ref>[March 2020 social media posts#COVID-19 a sign of dimensional merge]</ref> making it nothing but a transient event.</blockquote>

;[[Tobacky|tobacky]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' tobacco or tobacco products

<blockquote>''If I could, I would take every last ounce of '''tobacky''', put 'em on a rocket, and shoot 'em up to the Moon.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: American English slang, used by Chandlers since 1856,<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/tobacky#English</ref> and for [[random access humor]] since 1928.<ref>[http://www.uwosh.edu/home_pages/faculty_staff/earns/song.html Back in Nagasaki Where the Fellers Chew Tobaccy]</ref> Chris hates the act of smoking cigarettes so much that even uttering the word "tobacco" makes him feel uncomfortable, so Chris uses this as a retarded [[wikipedia:minced oath|minced oath]].<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica</ref></blockquote>

;tom-tom
[[File:Duck Pounding Some Tom-Tom.jpeg|thumb|A duck pounding some tom-tom real hard]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' female genitalia.

<blockquote>''MY DUCK HUNGERS FOR '''TOM-TOM''' TO POUND!!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/I_Am_The_TRUE,_Original_CCWC</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from the short Adult Swim music video, ''Pound my Tom-Tom'', which served as the intro to the cartoon, ''Lucy, the Daughter of the Devil''.<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r1DVoH0Njow</ref> Considering Chris barely understands anything adult, the fact that this was meant to be a bad euphemism, which the character, Lucy, used to avoid directly mentioning her vagina, flew over his head.</blockquote>

;[[Tomgirl Pictures|tomgirl]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A femboy, which is a person who identifies as male though still cross dresses.

<blockquote>''I am '''Tomgirl'''.''<ref>[[:File:I_am_tomgirl.jpg|PSN comment as of 6 April 2011]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: analogous to "tomboy", i.e. a girl who likes boy-stuff.

</blockquote>

;too many crooks

<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expression of dissatisfaction with an overabundance of evildoers.

<blockquote>''Well, call it--this was "too many crooks." '''Too many crooks!''' Too many crooks! And that ED page is one of those crooks.''<ref>[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Based upon the idiom, "too many cooks spoil the broth," although that idiom means something, whereas this is just an incomplete sentence.
</blockquote>

;took my idea for a fall

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Refers to ruining Chris's [[Love Quest]] plans.

<blockquote>''I am very mad and upset, because that JERK took my idea for a fall, just like that XXXXX at PVCC did!''<ref>[[CWC%27s Diary#2004]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this in his poem [[Saddest Heart in the World]] as well as a 2004 diary entry. Appears to be a mangling of "took me for a fool."</blockquote>

;triage

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' ménage à trois; a romantic relationship between three people.

<blockquote>''Magi-Chan Sonichu, Silvana Rosechu & Mewtwo / A Loving '''Triage'''''<ref>[[January 2018 Facebook posts‎‎#Mewtwo and Magi-Chan married]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A corruption or misspelling of "triad", possibly influenced by the ending of "ménage". "[[wikipedia:Triage|Triage]]" is a real word with a completely different meaning and unrelated etymology.
</blockquote>

;trollin' stupid

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Very stupid, in a manner pertaining to trolling.

<blockquote>''Because that's what you deserve, you God damn womanizing raping... '''trollin' stupid''' pickle suited... nigger!''<ref>[[Chris Drops the N-Bomb]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to have coined this phrase for his [[CWC "Boyfriend"|"Boyfriend"]] lyrics with "trollin'" serving as an intensifier along the lines of "fucking."
</blockquote>

;true and honest

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' something [[Honest content|honest]].

<blockquote>''I like sharing my honest feelings with other people because they're good feelings, most of the time. And more importantly they are '''true and honest''' feelings. SO THERE.''<ref>[[For Chris]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris first used the adjective with reference to his love for [[PandaHalo]], and the adjective was often used by [[Liquid Chris]].
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== U ==
|-
|

;ugly growth

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used by Chris to refer to his own penis negatively.

<blockquote>''"Did I not just tell you I am Seven Inches Long?! It is soo long, that I am literally able to stretch it Under my taint, and tuck it between my own ass cheeks, beyond my ass hole. With help, I can literally even shove the head of the '''Ugly Growth''' Up Mine!"''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Colin_Chat_2</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Un-clit|un-clit]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A piercing Chris got on his perrinium as an immitation clitoris.

<blockquote>''It is a short, steel straight piece with steel spheres, of which I refer to them as my '''un-clit'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Un-clit</ref></blockquote>

Origin: During his Tomgirl years, Chris was, and still is, very desperate to gain female body traits such as bigger breasts, wider hips, a fully functioning vagina, etc. In order to get a part of the work done, Chris got a piercing on his taint as a sort of pseudo-clitoris, showing more of Chris's limited knowledge of female anatomy. </blockquote>

;uncouth
[[File:Uncouth Twat.png|thumb|Most uncouth!]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' unlikeable, lacking good manners.

<blockquote>''And, by the way, among which, You give the Males a Most Terrible and Horrible Name in your behavior. Most '''Uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Colin_Chat_1</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''Trump is most Immature, '''Uncouth''', and Not Valid to be president.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Misc_E-mails#Anti-Pmurt</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I felt it appropriate to change my profile photo back to the filtered one for what happened in France the while back with due respect of the continuing of Trump's most drastic and '''uncouth''' actions in office.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/January_2017_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''You, sir, are '''Uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/2017_tweets#Trump.2C_you_mocked_the_mentally-challenged</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''All of you are nothing but immature, borish, '''uncouth''', and damned Neanderthals.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonic_Boom_Protests#Chris_Rages_On</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''Not Sexual Fantasy; Friendships, You '''Uncouth''' Cad. Hmpf!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2017_tweets#Unleashing_his_inner_Brit</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And as it Had been My fault on that #NationalGirlfriendTweet that started the whole mess, that was Why I chose whole-heartedly to Harass Me instead of Doopie or Anyone Else who was being harassed with the mis-content from Years Ago from me taken Out Of Context, Mind you, because Harassing Anyone at Anyone else’s Expense is Just Plain Wrong, Bullying, and '''Uncouth'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2017_tweets</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote> ''And it was ignored by you that Talulah Bankhead coined the term for Tabitha, you '''Uncouth''' Twat.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2017_tweets#Tabitha_addresses_CWC_flame_war</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I agree it is shameful of these people to have accounts just to haze at me and all others, Soo '''uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/NightStar2891_tweets#Twitter_spam_for_Tabitha</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I miss Jessica. You Trolls Scared Her Off by either Hacking or Reporting her Facebook. You '''Uncouth''' Cads!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jessica_Quinn</ref></blockquote>

Origin: As demonstrated, Chris uses this word way more than any 21st-century [[American]] would. It is often speculated that Chris picked up this word from an ''MLP'' episode, where Applebloom and Applejack are talking about what the word "uncouth" means.<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S-SrQ-Oz1k4</ref> Seeing how this conversation alone is somehow a staple in the Brony subculture, and how Chris is one of those Bronies who sees more [[Night_Star#Chris_spills_the_beans|meaning]] in the show than it actually possesses, Chris likely picked up this term due to how foreign and smart it sounded to him.

Chris is also notorious for his use of British English whenever he tries to make it seem he knows what he's talking about. So it is also fairly likely Chris may have adapted this word solely because he thinks British English words will make him sound smarter.
</blockquote>

;[[UNGA-WUNGA]]
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' A sexual chant from the [[Cherokian Clan]].
<blockquote>''There is no quote to directly cite the use of this CWC-ism. This CWC-ism was used in one of Chris' art pieces appropriately named "UNGA-WUNGA"''</blockquote>
Origin: Comes from a horrifying art piece Chris drew of himself banging [[Jackie]] against a tree while a group of Cherokians masturbate to their orgy.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Unga_Wunga_Time.jpg</ref> As for the questionably racist phrase itself, Chris simply stated that it was "just a random phrase I randomly picked for the natives to chant as they jerked off."<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jackie_E-mails_11</ref></blockquote>

;unto
<blockquote>1. ''(preposition)'' Archaic or poetic form of the word "to".

<blockquote>''Now that it has been made fully clear to me, I am now able to devote myself fully '''unto''' you, Julie.''<ref>[[BlueSpike Skype Logs 7]]</ref></blockquote>
<blockquote>''I am very devastated, due to my SHATTERED HEART that [[Mary Lee Walsh|XXXXX]] caused '''unto''' me!''</blockquote>

Origin: Another one of Chris's autistic ways of sounding smart, possibly in imitation of the Bible. (c.f. ''[[Chris and hypocrisy|Do unto others...]]''). Chris uses this form more frequently than most English speakers of the 21st century should, even when it sounds unwieldy.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== V ==
|-
|
;vaginatables

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' female genitalia

<blockquote>''There is no quote to cite the use of this CWC-ism. Chris used this CWC-ism in an e-mail address "ILuvVaginatables@aol.com".''</blockquote>

Origin: A strange hybrid of the words "vagina" and "vegetables", purely for Random-Access Humor.</blockquote>

;vege-marmite

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Vegemite

<blockquote>''Certainly not a '''vege-marmite''' sanwich. Lol''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-372</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A retarded pun made by Chris to state his distaste for veggie marmite. Coincidentally, vegemite is essentially marmite, yeast extract from brewing beer turned into a pungent, salty paste, with vegetables and spices added in.<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vegemite</ref></blockquote>

;vestite

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A transvestite person.

<blockquote>''"That is the difference between Trans Gender and '''Vestites'''; ID as the other sex, and dressing like it, respectively"''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-335#post-2635076]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In the above post, Chris intended to write the words "transgender" and "transvestite" in the same sentence without duplicating the trans suffix. He did so by adding a space between the prefix and the respective endings. It is worth mentioning that "Vestite" is a word in Latin, and simply refers to being clothed, without any connotations regarding cross-dressing.</blockquote>

;[[Virgin with Rage|virgin with rage]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An individual who is sexually frustrated

<blockquote>''Tell me why
I'm stuck as a '''virgin with rage'''!
Tell me why
I so need a cute girl my age!
Tell me why
I never wanna hear you say,
"I have a boyfriend!"''<ref>[[So Need a Cute Girl]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The idea of being a virgin and not having a sweetheart was something that greatly upsetted Chris. He would throw tantrums after losing a potential sweetheart, and thus missing out on an opportunity to lose his virginity.</blockquote>

;[[Virginia is for virgins]]

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase that pushes the idea that the citizens of Virginia won't allow Chris to get a girlfriend solely due to his autism.

<blockquote>"'''VIRGINIA IS FOR VIRGINS''', NOT LOVERS!"<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days
</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An intentional butchering of the phrase "Virginia is for Lovers". His belief that the state of Virginia is behind some kind of conspiracy to prevent him from finding true love has started since attending [[PVCC]]. While there, Chris has gotten himself putting up Attraction Signs, loitering with said signs on campus, and even creating a [[Sonichu's News Dash|newsletter series]] in order to attract potential sweethearts. Seeing how all of this violated the school's rules and policies, he was sent directly to the [[Mary Lee Walsh|Dean]] in order for her to straighten him out.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Virginia_is_for_Virgins#Origins</ref> Of course, Chris took this to be another instance of him being discriminated, solely for being autistic. This, coupled with the fact that he's already failed on several occasions to actually get to date any of his his female friends in high school, reinforced this belief. </blockquote>

;VOTES FOR WOMEN!
[[Image:Ss03.jpg|thumb|Mrs. Banks, wearing the "Votes for Women" sash that Chris so blatantly misinterpreted.]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase shouted in protest of pictures depicting women with penises.

<blockquote>'''''VOTES FOR WOMEN''', STEP IN TIME! VOTES FOR WOMEN, STEP IN TIME! NEVER NEED A REASON, NEVER NEED A RHYME, VOTES FOR WOMEN, STEP IN TIME!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic8P52.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from a sash Mrs. Banks, a character from [[Mary Poppins]], had worn. Chris clearly took this banner to simply refer to any kind of mistreatment towards women, rather than the fairly obvious implication that she's actually fighting for the right to vote.</blockquote>

<blockquote>''See Also'': [[CWC-isms#W|Women's Rights]]
</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== W ==
|-
|

;Walter Grisby
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A man's name often employed in acts of random-access humor.

<blockquote>''"Is this '''Walter Grisby'''? Who threw a frisbee? Well you know what? DAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!"''<ref>[[Random-access humor]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' The retconned name of the character formerly known as [[Wes Iseli]].

Origin: Unknown; thought by some to be a reference to the Cartoon Network show ''Ed, Edd n Eddy''. A character in the PC game ''The Sims 3'' goes by the name of Walter Grisby, but the game's release post-dates Chris's first uses of the term by some years.
</blockquote>

; Warroir of Love
[[Image:WarriorOfLove.jpg|thumb|300px|History's greatest warroirs.]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' an advocate for spreading love and peace.

<blockquote>''"People! You do not understand! By Not blocking the Trolls, you are Promoting Hatred; They don't always side with Love. I Am '''Warroir of Love'''."''<ref>[[https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/902236285389111297]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Misspelling of the word "warrior". Chris considers himself a "warrior of love" because he believes that he is the [[Chris and kindness|voice of kindness]]. Most likely derived from the derogatory term "Social Justice Warrior", a term used for individuals who advocate for social justice and equality.
</blockquote>

; water on the rocks
[[File:Water and Dasani.jpeg|thumb|200px|Literally a drink on the rocks.]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' water poured over Chris's [[magic stones]] for drinking.

<blockquote>''#DrinkWater; Filtered or Bottled, preferred; Quartz, Rose Quartz, or Amethyst optional to enjoy it '''on the rocks''' (held in place with aluminum wire).''<ref>[[March 2020 social media posts#watch anime to kill coronavirus]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''staying hydrated with more than 101.4 ounces of filtered '''water on the rocks''' within a #Glacce bottle''<ref>[[January 2021 social media posts#GFuel and meditation]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In accordance with his [[Magical thinking|New Age]] beliefs, Chris purchased a Glacce water bottle for $80+, which features a crystal display set inside. He later placed one of his [[magic stones]] into it, crudely held in by aluminum wire, and refers to drinking from the bottle as "water on the rocks."
</blockquote>

;well-breasted
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Having large breasts.

<blockquote>''And her image dawned upon me in my imagination, starting out as the '''well-breasted''' pink electric-hedgehog (Pok'emon) with the long Raichu-like tail, I drew her outfit onto her in red and Battery-Charged Blue.''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Rosechu|CWCipedia article on Rosechu}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Confusion between "well-endowed" and "large-breasted".

</blockquote>

;witching hours
<blockquote> 1. ''(noun)'' The time between midnight and 4 AM that Chris cannot fall asleep during.

<blockquote>'' I know that I'm gonna be more effective with the '''witching hours''' during the night once again, whether I'm asleep or not, okay.<ref>[[Animated Everfree Message]]</ref>
</blockquote>
Origin: May have been picked up from Chris's increasing interest in the [[Magical thinking|occult]]. Generally, the phrase refers to the midnight hours, with the term being inspired by the ancient belief that supernatural events, like witches, demons, and ghosts, are at their most powerful at midnight. Chris adopted the phrase in reference to his [[Biological clock|unusual sleep schedule]].

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#B|biological clock]]
</blockquote>

;Woahly
<blockquote> 1. ''(interjection)'' Expression indicating surprise.
<blockquote>'' Who is it Rosey? The Stew's almost ready and I... '''Woahly'''..!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Sonichu15-2019draft-p11.png</ref>
</blockquote>
Origin: Portmanteau of "woah" and "holy... (as in the beginning of saying holy shit)," found in [[Sonichu 15]].
</blockquote>

;woman up
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' The female equivalent of manning up.

<blockquote>''Fellow autistic people! I encourage you to man and '''woman up''' [Subtitle: "It is Socializing In Real Life or Dust!"] respectively! Go out into the real world, and make real friends with full, great quality friendships! Do it now!''</blockquote>

Origin: Used in the second part of Chris’s Autism Tutorial, where he insultingly attempts to rally up all autistic people (regardless of their functionality) to form proper friendships, all while missing the point of “manning up”.
</blockquote>

;[[Women's rights]] (or Women's Lib)
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' Any kind of behavior towards women that does not involve abusing them physically or mentally.

<blockquote>''Christian Weston Chandler, A Man For The Women, For the '''Women's Rights''', For the Women's Justice, For the Women's Peace.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Other_documents</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' The right for women to not be depicted with a [[CWC-isms#P|pickle]].

<blockquote>''FOR OUR '''RIGHTS AS WOMEN''' AMONG ALL PEOPLE, I WILL OVERPOWER THOSE SLANDEROUS JERKS!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic8P58.jpg</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(noun)'' The act of women protesting by stripping down naked.

<blockquote>''Well, once we get our centerfolds shot and uploaded, hopefully those bastards will see and admire our beautiful lights.''</blockquote>

<blockquote>''Yeah, and if nothing else, we can still have a lot of fun trying.''</blockquote>

<blockquote>''With our lord's support in our peaceful protest, we can win this fight.''</blockquote>

<blockquote>''Victory for '''Women's Lib'''''.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic8P51.jpg</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: Chris's understanding of sexism is botched up beyond belief. His zeal towards the rights of women is believed to have originated from watching the 1964 Disney film, Mary Poppins. He was particularly influenced by Mrs. Banks, who has expressed distaste for unequal treatment for women in 1910 London. As to be expected, Chris missed the point of this part of her character, and instead used this in order to justify his treatment towards the women he meets. Chris also believed that the term "sexism" only applies to forms of violence against women, and not necessarily representing in a condescending manner.

</blockquote>

;wooden nickel
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Acoustic guitar.

<blockquote>''I got the idea of the challenge from him COPYING me playing Boston's "More Than A Feeling" on Guitar Hero on his old '''Wooden Nickel'''; if he wants to copy on Guitar, he may as well be challenged in a Sing-Off.''<ref>[[Katie Bay E-mails 3]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In real life, a wooden nickel is a now defunct form of currency used during the Great Depression. His use probably refers to the phrase "don't take any wooden nickels" - that is, he is calling the acoustic guitar a semi-worthless imitation of his Guitar Hero controller.
</blockquote>

;worse
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' Severely; extremely, in an adverse manner

<blockquote>''IMHO, having Seinor Citizens for Parents throughout your whole life is no picnic; they are '''WORSE''' Overprotective.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 6]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;worst mud, muck and bodily fluids

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Mud, among [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|other disgusting things]].

<blockquote>''The DAMN Trolling-Stupids have manipulated me; smeared my once good name through the worst mud, muck, and bodily fluids.''<ref>June 2012 Facebook posts#Damn Michael Snyder</ref></blockquote>

Origin: First used by Chris in a June 2012 Facebook post ranting about that damn [[Michael Snyder]]. Refers to having his good name or reputation dragged through the mud, with "bodily fluids" added in an attempt to garner sympathy.
</blockquote>

|-
|
;wrath
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Great [[Chris and anger|anger]] or rage. Considered one of the [[Chris and religion|Seven Deadly Sins]].

<blockquote>''Apparently, my, uh, heed of warning towards Vivian has gone unheard or otherwise SHE DID NOT REALIZE THE FURY OF MY '''WRATH'''''<ref>[[Sign Destruction Video]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Strength sufficient to lift an office chair.

<blockquote>''I HAAAVE THE POWEEERRRR!!! FEEL MY '''WRATH'''!!''<ref>[[Power]]</ref></blockquote>
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

==X==
|-
|
;X2-checking
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' Double Checking
<blockquote>''Just '''X2-checking''' if you got the drawing I left you.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-11-2017-chris-spotted-at-bronycon.33187/page-35#post-2511049]]</ref></blockquote>
Origin: Comes from x2 meaning times two, which means double to Chris.</blockquote>

;XXX-tended
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Sexually explicit
<blockquote>''ESPECIALLY WITH ALL OF THE TRUTH BOMBS AND ROSEY ROSECHU's POST-INTERSEX-TO-FEMALE TRANSITION AND OPERATION NUDES IN THE '''XXX-TENDED''' CONTROVERSIAL VERSION OF MY BOOK NUMBER EIGHT IN 2008!''<ref>[[Jail_Letter - 20 October 2021#22 October]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>
;XXXXX
<blockquote>1. ''(noun, censorship)'' censorship of the word "bitch"
<blockquote>''Mary Lee Walsh made it illegal to distribute the News Dash; I AM VERY ANGRY AT THAT '''XXXXX'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC%27s_Diary</ref></blockquote>
Origin: Chris's only instance of this peculiar censorship is in his [[diary]]. In it, Chris repeatedly refers to [[Mary Lee Walsh]] as an "XXXXX", clearly as a censorship of the word "bitch". Why Chris chose to replace all of the letters in the word with the capital letter "X", instead of using asterisks remains a mystery.</blockquote>

|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Y ==

</blockquote>
|-
|
;y'all should know me by now
|-
|<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' An introduction to complete strangers.

<blockquote>'''''Y'all should know me by now''', but if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of Sonichu, the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon, back on March 17th, 2000.''<ref name=csm/></blockquote>
Origin: His second message on YouTube, addressed to the ED trolls. He would use it several more times after this, possibly making this into his tagline. The introduction is made under the assumption that Chris is [[Chris and his Ego|already well-known]]. May have been partially derived from ''[[The Adventures of The American Rabbit]]'', where a character similarly begins a speech by saying, "You all know me."
</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;yea and merrily
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used to open videos where Chris is feeling [[Messiah complex|messianic]].

<blockquote>'''''Yea and merrily''' to everyone. Welcome to this.''<ref>[[Jesus Christ Chan Sonichu Prime Resurrected and Returned]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''Hey everybody! '''Yea and merrily'''.''<ref>[[Simple Existential Q&A]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A stupid play on "yea, verily", an antiquated phrase meaning "yes, truly", often assumed to have been said by Jesus in the {{w|King James Version}} of the Bible. Although the word "verily" is often used by Jesus in the King James Version, the phrase "yea, verily" never actually appears anywhere in the King James Bible. It does, however, appear in the {{w|Book of Mormon}}.
</blockquote>

;young at heart

<blockquote>1. ''(noun, attributive)'' An individual with childlike characteristics; a childish person.

<blockquote>''Hello Nintendo! Welcome to my Animal Crossing for Nintendo GameCube. I am your host. My name is Christian Weston Chandler. I live in Ruckersville, Virginia and I is [sic] 21 years old and I play because I am '''young at heart'''. So anyway we are going to take a tour of my ci-ty...in Animal Crossing.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Animal_Crossing_Documentary</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I am '''Young at Heart'''; a concept I have kept within myself since childhood.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-27-chris-wants-everyone-to-be-a-manchild-like-him.33726/]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''We, the '''Young at heart''' stand alongside our Liked and Cared others.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-27-chris-wants-everyone-to-be-a-manchild-like-him.33726/]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris more often than not advertises his childish nature as him being "young at heart", as if this was a more positive quality of himself, even going as far as using this as a reason for girls to fall in love with him in his attraction signs <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Attraction_Sign</ref>. This is because Chris can't tell the difference between being a child at heart, and being childish. In his mind, people who are considered "childish" actually lead a happier and more exciting life, since he believes that childlike people are more willing to show off their [[kindness]] and are generally more eccentric. In reality, adults who are "young at heart" generally have a somewhat innocent outlook of life and are generally interested in things considered suitable for children, yet understand their responsibilities as adults, something which Chris has failed to do since graduating [[High School]].
</blockquote>
|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Z ==
|-
|

;zap to the extreme
[[Image:ZapToTheExtreme.png|thumb|200px]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Go out and be brave.

<blockquote>''Go! Sonichu! Go out and '''zap to the extreme'''!''<ref>[[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote> ''Now everyone stay green and go out and '''zap to the extr-r-r-r-r-eme'''. Have a lovely day.''<ref>[[A New, Fun Trick]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: This phrase is first used on the cover of [[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]], where Chris's self-insert tells Sonichu to "zap to the extreme" as if Chris and Sonichu were in a bona fide [[Pokémon]] tournament. Chris would then end up using this phrase time and again, usually completely out of context of its original meaning.
</blockquote>

;zapbud
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A fictitious flower found in the ''Sonichu'' canon; Rosechu's favorite flower.

<blockquote>''Oh, Rosechu, you are as beautiful as a rose, though a '''Zapbud''' is the flower that heals your woes.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_Ode_to_Rosechu</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Essentially the result of Chris attempting to create a mythology around his ''Sonichu'' comics, Chris created some of his own flora as well. Because of how "zapping" was a very common theme in the earlier issues of ''Sonichu'', Chris thought about naming his flora after this one theme. The term has ironically become popular with trolls and enablers, where they name made-up characters and places after it.</blockquote>

<blockquote>2. ''(noun)'' a [[CWC-isms#S|sweetheart]].

<blockquote>''Yes, my blossoming '''zapbud'''. That's why we are here.''<ref>[[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In this context, the term is used the same way a female lover may be compared to a flower. This was clearly an attempt to make the flora have a greater significance by making it sound like something beautiful.
</blockquote>

;zombie-like

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' To be riddled with dementia.

<blockquote>''Also, Barb is literally a Zombie-Like Living Body with little remaining of Barbara (her Soul) within her anymore; that living body is Running on Fumes at this point. She CAN NOT Drive anymore, regardless of Van loss; she has the fridgid mental activity and physical ability like a scared deer in headlights nearly ALL the time since even before June, 2021.<ref>[[Jail Letter - 29 July 2022]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in a [[Jail Letter - 29 July 2022|Jail Letter]] where Chris seems to imply that during his affair with his mother, she might have been declining mentally.
</blockquote>

|}

==References==

<references/>

==Navigation==

{{CWC-isms}}
{{Lists}}
[[Category:CWC-isms]]

CWC-isms

2025-06-13T05:31:56Z

Anemichu: /* D */ added one I found interesting

<center>{{Honest}}</center>

{{Protip|Please refrain from using CWC-isms casually when writing articles, as this may make them difficult for newcomers to decipher.}}
One of [[Chris]]'s most notorious features is his strange '''vocabulary''', consisting of a mix of fairly standard words, slang, jargon, and various personal coinages.

Some of these coinages originate from a degree of prudery, likely inherited from his older parents and maintained by his childlike nature. Like many children who don't feel comfortable referring to [[Honest Content|adult concepts]] directly, Chris often resorts to creating cutesy euphemisms for a lot of words that anyone else his age would generally use with little reservation, which is common with autistic people. While some of them are understandable — after all, nobody would really relish discussing their [[Butt garments|diapers]] — others, such as "[[tobacky]]" instead of "tobacco", only serve to turn an otherwise normal sentence into an advertisement for Chris's childish nature.

Others are attempts to be clever that fail miserably, for example, he refers to [[semen]] as "[[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009|navy]]", because semen sounds like sea men, [[Random-access humor|get it?]] Still others come from Chris's love of manipulating words, especially backwards spellings, {{w|portmanteau}} blends, “verbing” nouns, or liberal use of suffixes like “- ish” or “-er”. Combine this with the idiosyncratic speech patterns that are common among [[autism|autistics]] (likely since standard language may seem inefficient to explain their thought processes), and you get his so-called '''CWC-isms'''.

CWC-isms may be combinations or butchered versions of words or phrases that already exist, entirely new words, commonplace words that he uses repeatedly in a peculiar or obsessive way, or entirely new phrases that Chris often has to explain afterwards because nobody knows what he's talking about.

==Primary categories of CWC-isms==
Nearly all CWC-isms belong to one of the four following classes:
# '''CWC-neologism''' - a ''new'' word or phrase, unknown until ''created by Chris''. Example: ''[[CWC-isms#L|Lovehogs]]'', a portmanteau of "love" and "hedgehogs".
# '''CWC-homonym''' - an ''existing'' word or phrase, to which Chris has given a ''different meaning''. These may be euphemisms, designed to avoid naming (to Chris) offensive things, or else due to Chris confusing an elevated word's meaning. Example: ''[[Duck]]'', for Chris's penis; ''[[CWC-isms#T|telekinesis]]'', used erroneously in place of ''telepathy''.
# '''CWC-archaism''' - an ''obscure'' word or phrase, known in English but seldom used by contemporary Virginians, which Chris has learned somewhere and has ''become characteristic'' for Chris's way of speaking/writing. Example: ''[[CWC-isms#U|Uncouth]]'', a word now rarely used outside the context of formal etiquette, which Chris used to tell people how much of a jerk he perceive they're being to him.
# '''CWC-misspelling''' - only the ''most notable'' of Chris's ''misspellings'', including deliberate re-arrangements: those which are characteristic for Chris's way of writing. Example: ''[[Geinus]]'', what he deems himself to be; ''[[Pmurt]]'' for Donald Trump, 45th and 47th president of the United States. Chris's sporadic, inconsistent use of some [[Catherine|British spellings]] while otherwise using American English can also be considered under this category.



__NOTOC__

<div style="position:fixed; bottom:0; center:0">{{Alphabet ToC}}</div>

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

==#==
|-
|

;12-9
[[Image:Sonichu 12-9 Cover.jpg|The cover for Sonichu #12-9|thumb|200px]]

<blockquote>
1. ''(numeral)'' A placeholder for the number thirteen.

<blockquote> ''There are no quotes that cite the use of this CWC-ism directly. Chris however used it in lists that exceed 12 items.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/1006915844016869377</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris has shown on a few occasions to dislike the number 13, due to him deeming it an unlucky number. This phenomenon, referred to as [[wikipedia:Triskaidekaphobia|triskaidekaphobia]], is already a popular superstition in American culture, and this is likely where Chris picked it up. His fear of the number has led to some bizarre effects, particularly in his numbering. A famous example of this unusual numbering shtick is in the 13th issue of his Sonichu comics, which he numbered as "Issue #12-9", in which he used an em-dash in the place of a decimal place. The 12-9 itself is meant to represent a value of "almost 13".</blockquote>

;15 minutes
[[File:15 minutes.jpg|thumb|200px|"It takes me fifteen f-yay minutes"]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' [[Masturbation]], the amount of time it takes for Chris.

<blockquote> ''Masturbation takes '''Fifteen LONG, Tiring and Annoying Minutes'''''<ref name=15min>[[Masturbation discussions]]</ref></blockquote>
<blockquote> ''Self-masturbation is really arduous and annoying. Another '''15 minutes''' down the drain.''<ref name=15min></ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris coined this phrase in 2021, using it in chats with the [[Watchmen]] and in the [[Workaholics Anonymous comic]].</blockquote>

;[[4-cent_garbage.com|4-Cent Garbage]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' The headquarters of [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] and [[4-Chan]] trolls in ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]''.

<blockquote> ''You will recognize her [?] as your sweetheart because from a fav- from a favor on her half, your internal clock will be restored fully, your enemies of '''4-cent-garbage''' will be vanquished, so you both will live together in peace. Live freely.''<ref>[[Sonichu 9 Official Videobook]]</ref></blockquote>
Origin: Since ED and 4chan were partly responsible for Megan's breakup with him, Chris decided to get payback on the both of them by combining the both of them into an evil corporation in Sonichu, dubbing it "4-cent Garbage".</blockquote>

;7-incher
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' A penis which measures seven-inches in length.

<blockquote> ''Good thing we stopped for a pack of condoms; it's too bad the regular-size ones break easily on my '''7-incher'''.''</blockquote>

Origin: According to Chris, his penis is about 7 inches, which he actually believes is the average length of a penis of an adult male <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_20#Oral_doesn.27t_count</ref>. Chris has made all kinds of weird euphemisms for just his penis alone such as this one, "ugly growth", and "duck".</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

==A==
|-
|
;abreast
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' full of; filled with.

<blockquote>''It was not until after saving the city from the forces of Count Graduon and his minions, that she realized her form's new assets. And she was '''abreast''' with delight and glee when she found not the Male Part, but a Vagina!''<ref>[[May 2015 Facebook posts]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''In fact, while I am fairly educated about Tribadism and '''abreast''' with theories, I would appreciate some experience with a lesbian or two who knows what she likes to enlighten me better, including on sensual massage and all that.''<ref>[[May_2015_Facebook_posts]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris uses this word when discussing feminine anatomy and lesbian sex, evidently because it includes the word "breast". He fails to realize that "abreast" actually means "adjacent" or "across".<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/abreast</ref> A possible confusion with the word "abound" or "abundant".</blockquote>

;Adult Swim
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' pornographic or otherwise "NSFW"; containing [[Honest Content|adult content]].

<blockquote>''She still has a great drawing style, even for the '''Adult Swim''' section."<ref>[[CWCSonichu-NightStar2891 DMs]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Refers to the Cartoon Network block ''[[Adult Swim]]''. Chris seemed to only consider the "Adult" part of this block's name, and therefore assumed he could use this phrase to describe anything that's "adult" to him. Note that the Cartoon Network block does not feature pornographic content.

</blockquote>

;adulterous
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' Of an [[Christian Weston Chandler's Adult Chronicles|adult]] and mature nature

<blockquote>''Originally it was supposed to be like, you know, like ages 7 and up, but then I end up going to the content, uh, it could be considered, be like, be like definitely be considered '''adulterous'''.''<ref>[[Lars Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: usually used to describe people who [[Ivy|cheat]] on their [[Blanca Weiss|partners]] (i.e. guilty of adultery), Chris only notices the "adult" component of the word.

2. ''(adjective)'' Insult of unclear nature
<blockquote>''Heeeeey, folks! It's me, [[Clyde Cash]]. I am the ruler of the internet and the internet trolls. I am an '''adulterous''' foe, a bastard and a self-righteous idiot who spends his time wallowing and trolling the one Christian Weston Chandler, and making up a whole bunch of dadgum rumors all over the internet!''<ref>[[100 2267]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris simply throws out the insult without a clear understanding of the word. Possibly referring to Clyde taking [[PandaHalo]] from Chris, though this is more aptly described as cuckoldry than adultery. Perhaps influenced by the verb ''adulterate''.

</blockquote>

;among which
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' Among other things. Et cetera. Also. Additionally

<blockquote>'''''Among which''' I can project myself to (the Ninja Turtles universe)''<ref>[[Dankula]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: [[Autism|Uncertain]]. Chris adopted this phrase and began using it heavily in a number of different contexts through-out 2018. Perhaps the clearest example of chris's over-use of "among which" is the [[Dankula|Count Dankula interview]], where Chris uses the phrase no less than ten times.

</blockquote>

;an' anurr thing
<blockquote>
1. ''(Phrase, transitionary)'' Signifies that Chris wishes to make another point about a subject he is discussing, and that he wishes he were Peter Falk.

<blockquote>''An' anurr thing...CHRIS. Your for real- your real name, as I have been told by Kacey, is only Chris Chandler! No "-tian," no "-topher," just Chris! So, admit that. '''An' anurr thing''', I NAME is NOT IAN! BRANDON!!! SOMETHING!!!!!''<ref>[[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: a corruption of "and another thing". Used constantly when Chris is angry.

</blockquote>
;[[Anaxis bird]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' Signifies that [[Anaxis]] was meant to be a messenger for the information that Chris requested he put in ''A Medium's Guidance''.

<blockquote>
''Perhaps you all may have heard how I came onto this from an '''Anaxis bird'''.''<ref>[[User:Anaxis/Watchmen Source Leaks#"Anaxis Bird"]]</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: A mangling of the phrase "a little birdie told me", indicating that an anonymous source gave someone a piece of secret information. Because of Chris's misuse of the phrase, the other Watchmen present had come to believe that Anaxis was influencing Chris to write both the [[Affirmations List]] and the [[Lovers Attributes List]].</blockquote>

;[[Anchuent Prophecy|anchuent]]
[[Image:Anch.PNG|right|thumb|Chris and Sonichu amazed by the Anchuent Prophecy]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' Describes anything that is archaic in the ''Sonichu'' canon.

<blockquote>
''Well, what's this? I'm havin' an upgrade? Huh! Huh! My- my powers are given me the ability to fly with my wings attached to my head! It's like a w- it's like an add-on! That's optional! Huh! Must have been done by '''Anchuent''' Powers, so awesome I can fly now! Huh!''<ref>[[Sonichu_3_Official_Videobook]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Initially, "anchuent" was taken to be a misspelling of the word "ancient" given Chris's [[Chris and English|poor grasp of the English language]]. Over time, however, it was revealed that "anchuent" was meant to be a portmanteau of the words "ancient" and "Sonichu", adding the "chu" part of "Sonichu" into the word "ancient".<ref>[[Sonichu_3_Official_Videobook]]</ref> </blockquote>

;and shit
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' And additional items.

<blockquote>''I don't want to believe in labels at all but I mean obviously, tale- the incest fanfics have come true '''and shit'''.''<ref>[[Incest call]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''But, yeah, I did not verbally argue as much growing up, and it took facing the even Toughter Moments since 2000 '''and shit''' for me to actually formulate and speak better self-defenses with what is Truth''<ref>[[Jail Letter - 20 October 2021#22 October]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A more profane variant of "and such" (see below). Chris often uses the phrase in unfitting contexts. He may have picked it up from [[Lars]]'s constant usage of the phrase during the 2010 [[Lars Call]].
</blockquote>

;and such
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' And additional items; to add to a list.

<blockquote>''At least to give you all, my patient, loyal Fans and Trolls, something to quell your pallets until Official Merchandise is sold in Official Stores such as Toys 'R' Us, GameStop, Best Buy, Wal-Mart, etcetera '''and such'''.''<ref>[[CWC Blog|Cwcipedia captain's log, 25 November 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris understands the term's meaning, but uses it superfluously.
</blockquote>

;anthropological
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' human-like, anthropomorphic.

<blockquote>''In dressing myself for the burial work, I saw Snoopy had merged with his '''anthropological''' self-counterpart on the C-197 half of the veil.''<ref>[[July 2021 social media posts#Eulogy for Snoopy]]</ref></blockquote>
</blockquote>

;artery

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' art.

<blockquote>''Good evening, but between this and the, uh, oh, and the other clips I would like to present you, uh, a few examples of hand '''artery'''.''<ref>[[CWC - Hand Drawn Original]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Not to be confused with the term for blood vessels. Chris doesn't seem to realize "art" is already a noun and doesn't need the suffix, and that "artistry" also exists.
</blockquote>

;as such

<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' In the manner previously described.

<blockquote>''They just hated me because they don't, they did not understand people with autism. And so they tortured me '''as such'''.''<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris overuses this phrase to the point of self-parody. He's either tacking it on to fill space when he can't think of the next thing to say, or he's peppering it into his language in a feeble attempt to sound intelligent.
</blockquote>

;ass burgers

<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' [[Asperger's Syndrome]]

<blockquote> ''There are no quotes that cite the use of this CWC-ism directly, as Chris instead alludes to it as "a bad cut of cow meat".</blockquote>

Origin: Since the CWCipedia Saga, Chris has been noted for disliking Asperger's Syndrome, viewing it as something that makes autistic people look bad due to the term vaguely sounding like "ass burgers". Chris has alternatively suggested the term can also sound like "something that can be picked nasally", aka "ass boogers".
</blockquote>

;ass manager
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Either a misspelling or a derogatory term for "assistant manager," based on the abbreviation "ass. manager."

<blockquote>''I did not learn until much later that the spritz had done a lot worse than I had imagined it would, as well as learning that they were the so-called "Manager" and "Ass Manager" of that particular store.''<ref>[[December 2014 Facebook Posts#Shit, Meet Fan]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris has only used this term once, when referring to the [[Yellow-Shirted Foe]]. It's unclear if this was a misspelling or [[Manajerk|yet]] [[Jerkop|another]] childish insult based on someone's job title.</blockquote>

;[[Attraction Location|attraction location]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any place Chris may sit to gain the attention of any passing women, only to get promptly kicked out afterward.

<blockquote>''Also, as of early November, I was reemitted into the Fashion Square Shopping Center, and since Mid-December, I totally left the UVA as an '''Attraction Location'''.''<ref>[[Story_of_My_Current_Days]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, having a very difficult socializing with women, thought that sitting around in a certain place and soliciting himself would be a better alternative. Therefore, it would make sense to him to sit in a location with many people in order to gain the attention of several women.</blockquote>

;attraction time

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The time that is spent at an attraction location

<blockquote>''Then, on my next visit to the mall, I felt seriously depressed about what had happened the other day; it killed my '''attraction time'''''.<ref>[[Story_of_My_Current_Days]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;audio-sonic feeling

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the arousing feeling caused by getting hit by sound waves

<blockquote>''Here is a most '''audio-sonic feeling'''. While at the club last night, the [[Chris and music|music]] was loud, maybe reverberating or echoing. The music and beats literally shook up my rack! I actually Felt the music playing and reverbing within my breasts, almost like my breasts had become a pair of speakers. It Felt Amazing and Arousing!''<ref>https://www.facebook.com/cwcville/photos/a.447204945915.244245.167832525915/10152771303590916/?type=3&theater</ref></blockquote>

Origin: As shown in the quote above, Chris believed that he was sexually aroused when sound waves hit him. In actuality, sound, a vibration,<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sound</ref> creates pressure. The louder the sound, the more pressure gets created from the wave. Therefore, very loud music should be able to hit Chris given that he's a [[obesity|huge target]], creating that "arousing" feeling, which is actually an alternation between high and low pressures.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== B ==
|-
|

;B-dog
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Derogatory epithet for women.

<blockquote>''Then that [[Mary Lee Walsh|'''B-Dog''']] ripped up my notes and all, dragged me to her quarters and talked down to me very RUDELY AND HOARSELY.''<ref>[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Childish censorship of the word "bitch"; bitch also meaning "female dog". [[Bubbles Rosechu]] is implied to say this in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], when she shouts "BEEE..!!!" at [[Silvana]].<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_8/Page_95|Issue 8 Pages 94-95}}</ref>
</blockquote>

;bally
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' round; having the texture of a perfectly round ball.

<blockquote>''I've always given her a "'''Bally'''-Scratch" where I stroke her head with all five fingers like as if I was gently squeezing a rubber ball.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_emails_2004-2006</ref></blockquote>

Origin: If one didn't know Chris was referring to his dog, Patti, and that he gives her a "Bally-scratch" on the head, one might conclude that he's fondling someone's genitals. Chris, [[CWC-isms#N|naive]] to how suggestive this sounds, gave this special kind of petting the name "Bally-scratching" because of how stroking her head felt like he was squeezing a rubber ball.</blockquote>

;Be Woman
<blockquote>1. ''(verb phrase)'' Be '''a''' woman.

<blockquote>''I am a Lesbian Transwoman; I am not confused or mentally ill about that; '''I Am Woman.'''''<ref>[[2017_tweets#Proud_to_be_a_feminist]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''How Dare You Insult and be so Inconsiderate of Her like that? '''She Is Woman'''; she would Never Revert Back.''<ref>[[NightStar2891_tweets#She_is_woman]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used regularly when Chris asserts his [[Tomgirl|transgender identity]], notable for the consistent lack of a proper article and capitalization of each word in the phrase. Originally only attested in the first person ("I Am Woman"), a post on Chris's [[Miss Night Star]] Twitter sockpuppet account uses the third person ("She Is Woman"). Technically first appears in [[Sonichu 8]] when [[The Incredible Lioness]] attacks [[Jason Kendrick Howell]], as the somewhat cliché musical reference [[wikipedia:I Am Woman|"I am woman, hear me roar!"]], which may have inspired Chris's broader use of the phrase. This could be a reference to the Bhagavad Gita or Oppenheimer ("Now I am become death, destroyer of worlds.") [[honor roll|but this is unlikely]].
</blockquote>



;[[Biological clock|biological clock]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[Wikipedia:Circadian Rhythm|circadian rhythm]]

<blockquote>'''I have a lot of stored caffeene [sic] in my energy supply, and not only kept me on my toes, but has also messed up my fucking '''biological clock''' as well.''<ref>[[Biological clock]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Although technically not used incorrectly in this context, the phrase "biological clock" is used exclusively for women in their child-bearing years. Possibly a confusion with "internal clock".
</blockquote>

;blangry
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' [[Chris and anger|Angry]].

<blockquote>''Oh, and how 'bout this?! I get '''BLANGRY'''! ''<ref>[[Chris Calls Clyde Out]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Given Chris's belief that he has [[Chris and English|mastered the English language]] and his [[speech impediment]], it's likely he meant to say angry.
</blockquote>

;blue-printed
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Skilled in engineering.

<blockquote>''I like many others, was born a foal; to a '''blue-printed''' Pegasus and a country tomboy earth mare.''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/attachments/screenshot_20171019-235945_01-png.299275/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris portrayed Bob's Pony Counterpart in [[Sonichu 12-9|''Sonichu'' #12-9]] as an engineer, just like the real [[Bob Chandler|Bob]]. Due to Chris's limited vocabulary, Chris knew very little words he could use to describe Bob's profession. Derived from the word "blueprints", the plans set for the design of a product. </blockquote>

;[[Boyfriend-free girl|boyfriend-free]]

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Single; particularly used on women.

<blockquote>''Ahh, well, it's been over a year and ten months now since I started my sweetheart-search; I still haven't found a '''boyfriend-free'''-caring-smoke-free-non-alcoholic-white-girl-near-my-age to build a relationship with from the ground up.''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris’s mission in life used to be to obtain a girlfriend and have sex. However, every chance he thinks he gets, they already have a boyfriend. This has made Chris “fear” girls who already have boyfriends.</blockquote>

;Buddha belly
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Excess fat that gives a person a [[obesity|very round appearance]].

<blockquote>''Okay, well, I admit I do have a '''Buddha belly''', but I am not lazy, I do get out and about, I exercise, I jog and work out, and I eat healthy.''<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: "[[Wikipedia:Buddha|Buddha]]" is a title given to several legendary figures in [[Wikipedia:Buddhism|Buddhism]]. In this case, Chris is making reference to [[wikipedia:Budai|Budai]], who is often known as "Fat Buddha". Chris presumably picked up the phrase from the ''[[Family Guy]]'' episode "To Love and Die in Dixie".
</blockquote>

;bugbears
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[Trolls]], [[weens]], and other Chris-related orbiters who make him miserable.

<blockquote>''Freaking CyberBullies!!!!!!! Real '''Bugbears''', they are!''<ref>[[Apologies to the liked Bronies and Pegasisters; PLEASE UNBLOCK ME ON TWITTER!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Although the term was originally defined in the 16th century as 'a cause of obsessive fear, anxiety, or irritation.', It was given a another definition centuries later to describe a race of hobgoblins made famous by [[Wikipedia:Bugbear (Dungeons & Dragons)|Dungeons & Dragons]]. It's widely believed that Chris picked up the term from [[My Little Pony]]: Friendship is Magic, which depicted these creatures as literal bear-insect hybrids that are first seen terrorizing the ponies.
</blockquote>

;buh bye bay nose
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' but if anybody knows.

<blockquote>''If I knew who you were, I'd give you a kick in da bawls. But I can't, because I don't know who or where you are. '''Buh bye bay nose''' the whereabouts of the... [[JERKS|jerk]]... and just happens to be nearby... or within the state? Give him a swick kick for me.''<ref>[[Christian's Update 13 September 2008]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A result of Chris’s [[speech impediment]]</blockquote>

</blockquote>
;but during the stone age...
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A rebuttal for something obvious being stated.

<blockquote>''You don’t have to tell me twice! '''But during the stone age...'''''<ref>[[Sonichu 2]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: According to the [[Sonichu 2 Official Videobook|Videobook for Sonichu #2]], the phrase originates from how you need to “tell cavemen twice” over anyone else.</blockquote>

;[[Butt garments|butt garment]]
[[Image:Ecp00065.jpg|thumb|Leaked footage of Chris in a butt garment]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' an adult diaper; typically one used to control Chris's [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|fecal incontenence]].

<blockquote>''The doctor corrected that they were liners; he never called them diapers. Neither did Chris- he called them “'''butt garments'''”.''</blockquote>

Origin: To avoid embarrassment from stating that he shits himself constantly, and uses diapers, Chris refers to his adult diapers as butt garments.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== C ==
|-
|

;C-Log
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' Captain's Log.

<blockquote>'''''C-Log''' February 4th, 2010. First off, I'm not dead, and I have a few announcements to make.''<ref>[[I am Alive]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: For quite some time, Chris has had the habit of abbreviating certain words or phrases that begin with "'''C'''", possibly for [[Chris and his Ego|his name also beginning with "'''C'''"]], as well as to put greater emphasis on the letter C in the words he abbreviates. Other examples of this kind of abbreviation include "C-Mas" and "C-Ville".
</blockquote>

;C-Mas
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' Christmas

<blockquote> ''The [[Christmas]] season is upon us, and with that comes the rush for the '''C-Mas''' Turkey, Tree (real or artificial), and of course, the presents. So, Sonichu and the News Dash have some helpful tips to give a better feel of the season to all.<ref>[[Sonichu's_News_Dash#A_Very_Special_Holiday_Chris-chan]]
</ref>''</blockquote>

Origin: See ''C-Log''.
</blockquote>

;C Ville (or C-Ville)
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' [[Charlottesville, VA]].

<blockquote>''Look, you're going to back in '''C-Ville''' tomorrow, I can meet you at the McDonalds at Forest Lakes, what time is good for our meeting?''<ref>[[Vanessa AIM Chat 3]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Generic term for any city whose name fits the pattern of beginning with "C" and ending with "ville," e.g., [[CWCville]], Charlottesville, etc.

<blockquote>''And when you diss Cwcville you disf- you diss every "'''C Ville'''" within these United States.''<ref>[[Do Not Dis C Ville]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: See ''C-Log''.
</blockquote>

;[[Captain's Log|Captain's Log]]
[[File:CWCtrek1.png|400px|right|thumb|The Autistic Generation]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' The classic opening for a vlog video Chris makes to adress the fanbase, which includes the date of production. Replaced in 2015 with "live from home once again".

<blockquote>'''''Captain's Log'''. Stardate: September... 24th, 2008.''<ref>[[Chris Chan Update 24 September 2008]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: One may come to the conclusion that Chris picked up this phrase from Star Trek, however, Chris is neither a fan of the Star Trek franchise, nor has he seen any clips of the show<ref>[[Mailbag_3]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag_14]]</ref>. It is more likely that Chris picked up the phrase from cartoons like [[Family Guy]], which references Star Trek, considering how much he watched the show religiously.</blockquote>

;carniverous
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' evil, vengeful.

<blockquote>''On today's show, we will take a close-up look at the '''carniverous''' jerkops.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComic5P29.htm</ref></blockquote>Origin: A misspelling of "carnivorous". It is unknown what word Chris meant to use here, but "carnivorous" certainly wasn't it.</blockquote>

;[[China|china]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Female genitalia

<blockquote>''I love dykes! DYKES! '''CHINA!'''''<ref>[[CWC's_Second_Message]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, uncomfortable with directly saying the word "vagina", decided to alter the word to a cutesy, similar-sounding word. Based off of a term for porcelain "china".</blockquote>

;coldest shoulder

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' to rebel.

<blockquote>''Those people like me at the very least, NOT counting all of the deceitful people I have had the displeasure of knowing who turned '''Coldest Shoulder''' Against me and STARTED all of the Online Hatred.''<ref>[[April_2012_Facebook_posts]]</ref>

''One of which, Amanda, is one of the Part-Time Manajerks who gives her elders the '''coldest of shoulders'''.''<ref>[[Coffee Place]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A misuse of the phrase "turning a cold shoulder", a phrase used for the negligence of another person<ref>https://www.collinsdictionary.com/us/dictionary/english/turn-a-cold-shoulder-to</ref>. </blockquote>

;Come Adore
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A sermon from Chris's religion.
<blockquote>''That's all for now. Be safe and well.

Mrs. Jesus Christine Chan Sonichu.

Commodore Come Adore<ref>[[Jail Letter - 27 June 2022]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Yet another retarded pun from Chris, specifically based on the [[Commodore 64]].
</blockquote>

;[[Comeuppance|comeuppance]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Male orgasm.
<blockquote>''...I feel my '''comeuppance''' and I come into your mouth, my [[semen]] is inside your mouth and you'd swallow every drop. (...) And right after I'd given you my first round, my first '''comeuppance''', you would take, you would reach down, and you would take your face away from my penis...''<ref>[[Chris Sex Logs]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' [[Semen]], usually immediately after ejaculation. ''See also: [[CWC-isms#N|Navy]]''
<blockquote>''Yeah, and I'm just gonna keep bangin' your breasts over and over again until you get the first dosage of my '''comeuppance'''!''<ref>[[Kacey Phone Call]]</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: Chris uses the sexual slang "cum" as a [[For Julie's Eyes Only|verb]] for orgasm, but he may not realize it can also be a noun referring to ejaculate. In his mind, "comeuppance" apparently serves that purpose, viz., "that which has come/cum up."

In the real world, "comeuppance" is an English noun meaning [[Wiktionary:comeuppance|outcome which is justly deserved]] based upon the common verb "come," i.e., the state of coming forward to receive judgment. He is either unaware of the original definition of the word or does not appreciate the irony of telling women he's going to give them comeuppance.

Note that the contexts of the real word and Chris's version are different. When a woman is rebuked, she receives her comeuppance; when a woman gets Chris's hot load in her face, she receives ''his'' "comeuppance."
</blockquote>

;count you(r) blessing(s)
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used as a retort when someone complains about the quality of your work.
<blockquote>It’s an early thing; it will improve later on. Curb your enthusiasm and '''count your blessing.'''</blockquote>
Origin: In [[January 2020]] Chris was seen using the phrase when he was attacked after chimping out about being blocked on social media. Recently people have been questioning the quality of the newest [[medallions]], produced by [[Praetor]]. Chris, perhaps in an attempt to "calm the trolls down'' tells them to '''count their blessings''.</blockquote>

;crash into slumber (or crash and burn)
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To get so sad and [[Chris and stress|stressed out]] that you get tired from exhaustion.

<blockquote>And… the void in my heart that requires a sweetheart is open again, and it hurts. I hope you jerks and trolls who wanted to break us up… are happy… 'cause all you did was make me feel sad and depressed. And you made me '''crash… into slumber'''… a couple of times. And you know, it takes a lot of stress and exhaust… and such… to make a person feel like they're gonna crash and burn… into a whole bunch of s-- into a long slumber… that just basically sleeps o-- that just basically sleeps off the—uh, what's the word I was looking for? I had it. Ugh…<ref>[[Chris Chan Update 21 October 2008]]
</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris famously said that he "crashed into slumber" in the video [[Chris Chan Update 21 October 2008]], where he shows off how depressed and angry he was with his latest tomfoolery at the time. It could be because that one of Chris' main methods of coping with his stress is to sleep it off, and tried to make it sound hyperbolic by stating that he "crashed" onto the bed, as if he tried to get it done sooner.</blockquote>

;crestfallen
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Sad and disappointed

<blockquote>''I should have been Highly Recognized for my ARTISTIC TALENTS I showed in my Many Art Classes for the Award Ceremonies before Graduation Day. I felt '''crestfallen''' greatly from not getting recognized for any of my Talents. I EXCELLED IN MATH TOO FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Manchester_High_School</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I also HAD Hidden ALL of the Blue Armed Sonic Toys at Toys R Us here, concealed hidden amongst their metal cupboards, so they ALL would NOT be SOLD, and Best Boycotted for The Protest! They remained hidden for the longest time of over a Month; found and reshelved near the 20th of December to my personal dismay and '''crestfall'''. And at Best Buy, ALL Copies of THEIR Sonic Boom Games are STILL SUCCESSFULLY CONCEALED AND HIDDEN from View AND Purchase!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/26_December_2014</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Another obscure word Chris liked to use a lot, even today. It even got to the point where he tried to put it into a baffling progressive tense "to my dismay and crestfall".</blockquote>

;crooks
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Those who may steal Chris's intellectual property for malicious purposes. ''(pl.)''

<blockquote>''I aways keep my eyes open for '''crooks''' who take my [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]]'s name and put it in offensive use!''<ref>''[[:File:116-CWCCop.jpg|116-CWCCop.jpg]]''</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' websites, and even words on websites which communicate lies about Chris.

<blockquote>''And that [[ED]] page is one of those crooks. Every page--every word on the discussion page is a '''crook'''.''<ref>[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A finishing move Chris does on his adversaries in order to "curse" them, publicly or otherwise.

<blockquote>''Hmmm...'''Curse-ye-ha-me-HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/NO_D***_WAY,_IMPOSTOR!!!</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A reference to the Kamehameha energy attack from the [[Dragon Ball]] series, performed in the same way it is in the anime. Chris believes that he possesses [[Chris and reality#Magic|magical powers]]. Typically, these so-called magical powers would be used whenever an enemy gets in the way of whatever he wants to do, since Chris is too afraid to actually fight anyone. Therefore, he will rely on this magical power in order to gain control of whoever is giving him trouble.</blockquote>

;CWC-sense
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The ability to sense Chris's presence.

<blockquote> ''Seriously though, awesome timing coming in, just as we, and Chris, had just finished writing the lyrics...was your '''CWC-sense''' tingling?''<ref>https://www.patreon.com/posts/15092809</ref></blockquote></blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== D ==
|-
|

;D.A.
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' Unexplained, presumably a substitution to avoid the word "dumbass." Most likely ''not'' "District Attorney," although equally applicable to [[Marvey Blaziken]].

<blockquote>''You are obviously a troll trying to pick on my nerves; nice try, '''D.A.'''''<ref>[[Mailbag 15]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris intermittently decides to self-censor his profanities for the benefit of younger readers.
</blockquote>

;da
<blockquote>1. ''(article)'' [[Wikipedia:Eye dialect|Eye dialect]] spelling of the word [http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/the the].

<blockquote>''Y'all know me as [[DJ Jamsta|Jamsta Sonichu]], '''da''' DJ with da power!''<ref>[[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], page 43</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris writes "the" as "da" when he intends for his characters (or himself) to sound laid-back and cool. This is most notable with Jamsta Sonichu, who is supposed to sound like a hip radio DJ and/or a [[Niggos|Jamaican man]]. Chris may intend at times to do the same thing in his verbal communications, although his [[speech impediment]] makes it difficult to tell when he actually means to say "da."
</blockquote>

;Da Update
[[File:Daupdate.jpg|thumb|400px|[[Megan]], comparing Chris's [[Chris and his Ego|attitude]] to [[Dragon Ball Z|Goku]].]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' The latest news.

2. ''(phrase)'' The most recent fail Chris is responsible for.

<blockquote>''Hey, guys! What's '''da update'''?''</blockquote>

Origin: Dialogue used by Chris, in an exceedingly awkward attempt to sound casual, in the pages of [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]. As Chris's [[fans]] have searched the Internet for the latest news from our hero, "da update" has become shorthand for "the latest [[Relics of Fail|failure]] Chris has committed." The phrase became legendary when posted above the Chris-chan talk page on [[ED]] (eventually the page was locked, forcing mass migration to the [[PVCC (message board)|PVCC]]).

</blockquote>

;[[Darling|darling]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A potential lover, even one that shows no affection back at you.

<blockquote>''Thank you, Doopie '''Darling'''. :)<ref>[[July 2017 tweets#Thanks, darling]]</ref>''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris, so hellbent on being [[Chris and kindness|kind]] to just about any potential sweetheart he met, thinks it's appropriate to refer to women he doesn't know outside of the internet by pet names to sound like he really cares for them, despite it being creepy to most other people. Chris's main justification for using this word on women who don't bond with him is that the actor [[Wikipedia:Tallulah Bankhead|Tallulah Bankhead]] used this word a lot, ignoring the fact that she only did this while on set.</blockquote>

;[[Dating education|Dating Education]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' formal education in schools about dating people of the opposite sex.

<blockquote>''Also, in addition, while we also fully support Sexual Education in every high school, Christian Weston Chandler also highly recommends, and would gladly support, '''Dating Education''' classes, because, while Sex Ed is great for the eventual, well-earned intercourse after 3 or more dates, it is vital to learn what to do before that moment. It should be well0taught how to approach and ask one’s member of the opposite gender out for the very first date.''<ref>[[:File:DatingEducation.jpg]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The lack of "Dating Education classes" is something that Chris used to complain about all of the time, because he's simply incapable of finding a [[CWC-isms#S|sweetheart]], and that it would be a great advantage for people of his type to learn how to do so. Chris doesn't understand that a key aspect of obtaining a mate is to develop the proper [[Chris and socialization|social skills]], especially those around [[women]], and that it has very little to do with how much sex he has with them.</blockquote>

;dementia
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A synonym for Chris's [[autism]].

<blockquote>''My brain is blank and, I definitely wouldn't have realized. Word of the day, Dementia. The umbrella term for all the mentally wearing down people, I got some dementia okay? So give me time, give me space, alright? And some slack.''<ref>[[Live Game Stream - C-Log 04192017 - The Shirt]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;detail
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A thing of importance that Chris cannot recall at any given moment.

<blockquote>''I do not have the appropriate calm state of mind to make time to READ those numerous upon numerous small-print '''details''', much less memorize them.''<ref>[[Wikipedia#May 2009 drama]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

<blockquote>2. ''(noun)'' Something that Chris does not understand.

<blockquote>''There was one I remember from then where the essay had a lot of offensive content, including smoking, and I spoke my mind on how offended I was of it. Plus other details I misunderstood that he was expecting in the assignments.'' <ref>[[Jackie E-mails 9]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's ability to retain information is questionable (unless it's about [[Sonichu (comic)|something]] [[Lego|he]] [[Pokémon|obsesses]] [[PS3|over]]). As such, he "misunderstands" and "forgets" a lot of glaringly important things, such as [[Father call|how to live on his own]] and [[Jackie E-mails 2|the fact that he cheated on Ivy]].
</blockquote>

;devotee
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An [[enabler]] of Chris.

<blockquote>''Ah, I believe I have the proper term. Going from "Worshiper", I checked the thesaurus:"'''Devotee'''" in the term sounds better. "Devotees of Chris Chan Sonichu"(DoCCS). This is my better educates and thought suggestion." ''<ref>[[November 2019 social media posts#Devotees of Chris Chan Sonichu]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Believing himself to be a goddess, Chris needed a term to refer to any of his followers. The term was originally "worshiper", but then after a quick thesaurus search, he decided to change the term to "devotees", solely because he thought it sounded smarter. Although technically a synonym of "worshiper", the term "devotee" is more often used in Eastern religions such as Hinduism and Buddhism.
</blockquote>

;Did the do, to do the do
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To have sexual intercourse, likely under deceptive conditions

<blockquote>''[[Lovely Weather|Lovely]] was hot. She mistook me for myself and we went home from work that night, so Lovely and I '''did the do''', and it was awesome!''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_10/Page_2|Issue 10 Page 2}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An even more benign variation of the common euphemism for sex, "doing it". Likely taken from [[Wikipedia:Emission_Impossible|an episode]] of [[Family Guy]].
</blockquote>

;dige
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Marijuana

<blockquote>''My name's [[Inos]]... wha' chu up to? I am eclectic on this hedge... high on the hog... you wan' som' of this '''dige''', mon?''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_10/Page_70|Issue 10 Page 70}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Intended to be part of a coded reference to "Sonichu, Electric Hedgehog Digimon". It is not known why he changed the reference from "Pokemon" to "Digimon".
</blockquote>

;[[dimension]]
[[File:Chrisminecraft.jpg|right|thumb|In a universe of multiple realities, anything is possible according to Chris.]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Either our universe or a fictional one, such as the one in which ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' or ''[[My Little Pony]]'' are set, both held to be equally [[Chris and reality|real]] in Chris's ontology.

<blockquote>''For Our Home World and All other '''Dimensions''', Realities and Worlds; All Of Us! Dance! Dance! Dance!!!''<ref>[[Freestyle Dance With Me, For Our World]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Dumbing down some physicists' hypothetical notion of other physical universes embedded in mathematically higher-dimensional space, which has since seeped into pop culture and thence down to Chris.
</blockquote>

;[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Used as a reference to Chris's fecal incontinence.

<blockquote>''I have NUMBERS OF PAIRS OF '''DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS'''.''<ref>[[IRC_(20_January_2009)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this phrase during an [[IRC (20 January 2009)|IRC chat]] with [[Clyde Cash]] and [[BILLY MAYS]] after they alleged that Chris has a fondness to wear women's underwear. In order to confirm his straightness, he retorted by admitting the fact that he has "NUMBERS OF PAIRS OF DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS". Soon after, due to how humorous the phrase sounded, it became a shorthand for trolls to refer to Chris's fecal incontinence.</blockquote>

;disabled of crafting
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Too apathetic to work

<blockquote>''Since last December with the Lulu.com problems (resolved), that has left me with a bad emotional and mental scar. Leaving me feeling '''disabled of crafting'''...''<ref>[[August 2016 Facebook posts#Too lazy to work]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris being defensive when a customer asked how he could be trusted to follow through on an order, when he had failed to send out orders from his Etsy shop, which resulted in his seller account getting closed.
</blockquote>

;dispel
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' Reject, turn away

<blockquote>''[T]o dispel me is to discriminate against the LGBTQ community as well.<ref>[[Unban_contracts#GameStop|GameStop unban contract]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A misunderstanding of the meaning of the word.</blockquote>

;Dork of Ages
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Someone who deserves scorn for creating an [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] article on you.

<blockquote>He is the '''Dork of Ages'''. Y'all should be sending every last complaint and hatred towards—rain down upon him. Send him every last email you can. Shower him with as much hate as possible until that Encyclopedia Dramatica page is taken down, [gives a thumbs down] along with him.<ref>[[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used on [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] after he created Chris' Encyclopedia Dramatica page. This phrase was [[List of phrases Chris copied from media|taken]] from the American Dad episode "Dungeons and Wagons", where Hayley called Steve the "Dork of Ages" while he played "Dragon Shuffle".</blockquote>

;Drunk, High Aqua Teenatic
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Backstabber.

<blockquote>''You could be a Better, More Supportive Friend, instead of a '''Drunk, High Aqua Teenatic''' with your sweetheart!!!''<ref>[[October 2017 Facebook posts#Quinn breaks up with Chris again]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A bizarre attempt to turn the title of the Adult Swim cartoon, ''[[Aqua Teen Hunger Force]]'' into an insult.</blockquote>

;[[Duck]]
[[Image:BentDuck.jpg|thumb|right|An example of a bent duck]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's penis

<blockquote>''MY '''DUCK''' HUNGERS FOR TOM-TOM TO POUND!!!!!''<ref>[[I_Am_The_TRUE,_Original_CCWC]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Initially "duck" was taken to be a typo of "dick" since the "u" and "i" keys are close together. It was later revealed that Chris was using this neologism as an intentional euphemism to refer to his own penis.<ref>[[Mumble 8]]</ref>

''See also:'' [[CWC-isms#P|pickle]]</blockquote>

;Dyke

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A vagina.

<blockquote>I love dykes! DYKES! '''CHINA!'''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2008]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In actuality, the word dyke (or dike) refers to an embankment, wall, or ridge built to control or confine water. It is also a derogatory term for [[lesbians]], which is somewhat ironic, given Chris' homophobia at the time.</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== E ==
|-
|

;elbow-greased
[[Image:Elbow-Greased Strength.jpg|200px|thumb|Chris gets swole]]

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Earned from hard work and exercise

<blockquote>''There are no quotes that cite the use of this CWC-ism. It appears in his [[resume]], where he lists "elbow-greased strength" as one of his "functional skills"''</blockquote>

Origin: A misuse of the idiom, "elbow-grease", a figure of speech humorously used for tasks that involve manual labor only. </blockquote>

;[[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]]''

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any of the characters found in Sonichu which are hybrids of [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] characters and/or Pokemon.

<blockquote>''Since the inspiration and conception of Sonichu, the '''Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon''' on March 17, 2000, I have grown further in his stories, plots and adventures in a series of hand-drawn and computer-edited comic books.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris%27s_resume</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Despite the name, a majority of "Electric Hedgehog Pokemon" are neither Pokemon or hedgehogs. This misnomer may come from Chris's original characters being hybrids of two Sonic characters, both of whom are hedgehogs (Sonic and Amy Rose) and two Pokémon (Pikachu and Raichu).</blockquote>

;emotional differences

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A strong disagreement between two people.

<blockquote>''I told you! It was, it was because of, uh, '''emotional differences.'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call#The_Shit_Hits_the_Fan</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris mentioned that he got terminated from [[Wendy's]] in the [[Father Call]], due to their "emotional differences", possibly meaning that a heated argument between him and his employer ensued.</blockquote>

;empirical
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' resorting to experience to gain knowledge rather than through scientific means.

<blockquote>''So, throw away the book talk; be '''empirical''' and believe what you know is fact'' <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2012_Facebook_posts#Empirical</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris attributed the nearly opposite definition of the word to Jeremy Hilary Boob PhD, a character from [[Wikipedia:Yellow Submarine|''Yellow Submarine'']]. Considering this, Chris must have picked up this strange definition from the content in the Beatles Edition of ''Rock Band''.</blockquote>

;entendre

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Charisma or attraction

<blockquote>''Too much '''entendre'''?''<ref>https://www.patreon.com/posts/15092809</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Derived from the phrase "double entendre", a figure of speech used for words or phrases with a double meaning, typically [[Duck|with]] [[Mass Debating|one]] [[China|of]] [[Recycling|them]] [[Pickle|being]] [[Comeuppance|risque]].<ref>https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/double%20entendre</ref> In English, the word "entendre" isn't typically used outside of the phrase itself, but in many other languages like French and Catalan, it is understood to mean "to hear" or "to understand". Chris, thinking he knows everything there is to know about the English language, once again thought he would sound smart by using this obscure word.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== F ==
|-
|

;[[Fangs|fangs]]
[[File:Showing_Off_Fangs.jpg|thumb|right|200px|How Chris imagined himself when showing off his canines]]
[[File:ChrisCavities.JPG|thumb|right|200px|The reality. The red arrows point to Chris' cavities]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's canine teeth.

<blockquote>''They're called Eye-Teeth, but they feel and look like '''fangs''' of a vampire, dog or something to me.''<ref>[[Sonichu_Girls#Your_understanding_me_fukky_.281_January_2009.29]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I'm not afraid to SHOW MY '''FANGS'''!''<ref>[[CWC_Update_8_January_2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes his teeth to be unordinary compared to most other people's teeth, apparently believing canine teeth are some kind of special trait only a selected few people have. Because he believes his canines to be menacing, he gave them the name "fangs". Once in a while, Chris would show off his decaying teeth to scare his enemies. This usually works, although for the wrong reasons.</blockquote>

;faredoo
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection, imperative verb)'' Parting salutation, akin to "goodbye".

<blockquote>''Vessel of my loneliness for the past three years of anguish. I bid you fond...'''faredoo'''. Adieu. Fond farewell adieu...''<ref>[[The MovingFoward videos]].</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Accidental portmanteau of "farewell" and "adieu".
</blockquote>

;fart-minded

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' dumb and perverted.

<blockquote>Ha Ha! Take THAT, you '''fart-minded''', jerk [[MALE]] among ALL fart-minded, jerk Males that make up the Majority of the Worldwide Male Population! -:D<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivtWQTjXCDs</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in the comment section of a Stopmotion Lego animation, where a ''Lego'' minifigure is in a sexual relationship with a ''Lego Friends'' minifigure. Throughout this video, the Lego minifigure essentially acts how Chris believes most men do. At the end of the video, the male minifigure proceeds to fart, which disgusts the female minifigure. Also a possible butchering of the phrase "brainfart", which is used to humorously refer to a moment of absentmindedness.</blockquote>

;firstly
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' A word that indicates that Chris is about to tell someone why he's right. Often not followed by an enumerated list of reasons, despite the implication.

<blockquote>'''''Firstly''', Aspergers is NOTHING Similar to Autism; Aspergers pertains to MEMORY, Autism is Social Skills. and I'm High-Functionally Autistic''<ref>[[IRC_(02_January_2009)|IRC chat, 02 January 2009]].</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Use of "firstly" to begin a list, rather than "first," is a matter of dispute. While both words exist in the dictionary, "Firstly" has fallen out of common use in speech and tends to sound more formal, perhaps overly so. Chris seems to like this formality, probably because he thinks it sounds smart.
</blockquote>

;fondful
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' fond.

<blockquote>''Faithfully yours with '''fondful''' thoughts; Chris Chan.''<ref>[[Megan Emails, Jan-July 2007|Chris's email to Megan Schroeder]], 06 July 2007</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris apparently doesn't understand that "fond" is already an adjective by itself.
</blockquote>

;for good-like
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' final, but with the imagined possibility otherwise.

<blockquote>''And in June of 2008, he banned me from the store '''for good-like'''.''<ref>[[Wallflower E-mails|Chris's email to The Wallflower]], 18 February 2010</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Confusing modification of "for good".
</blockquote>

;foresee/foretell/foreknow
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To make a wild guess at something occuring, claiming it's a "prediction".

<blockquote>''#Saberspark Is right. This is one reason why I stay clear from certain games and shows. My intuition also senses and '''foresees''' the quality and feel without even having to watch or play it at all''<ref>[[March 20March 2025 social media posts#Brainrot]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(verb)'' To have predicted something that already happened or that someone else claimed would happen, but didn't.

Origin: Chris claims he has the ability to predict the future, an aspect of his divinity. However, Chris only ever makes these claims whenever an event has already happened, claiming he predicted it would, or when he makes a confident guess at the future based purely on his intuition.
</blockquote>

;foundate
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To dedicate, as in a monument or building.

<blockquote>''I, Christian Weston Chandler, re-'''foundate''' this monument that is the PAGE with MY SOLE HONEST TRUTH from my sound mind and heart.''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|1=Christian_in_his_Own_Words#Captain.27s_Log.2C_Stardate:_June_6.2C_2009|2=Christian in his Own Words}}.</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Likely a portmanteau of "found" and "dedicate", or a bizarre attempt to convert "foundation" into a verb.
</blockquote>

;four-boomerang-shaped symbol
[[File:Fourboom.jpg|thumb|right|"G'Day welcome to Auschwitz"]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' minced oath for "[[Wikipedia:swastika|swastika]]," especially the ''Hakenkreuz'' symbol of the [[Nazis|Nazi]] Party.

<blockquote>''Like Most People, I do not care much for Adolf; he was a terrible man, and even in jest, I WOULD NEVER want to portray him, much less, his '''four-boomerang-shaped symbol''' (I know what it is called, but I do not wish to type the word).''<ref>[[Mailbag 5#That wacky Hitler|Mailbag 5]]
</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris was apparently afraid to say the word "swastika," probably for the same reason he used to [[Niggos|fear using racial slurs]].
</blockquote>

;fourth wall

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A boundary that separates [[Reality Cartoon|reality cartoons]] and [[Dimensions|dimensions]] from dimension C-197.

<blockquote>''Hey, Everyone. I have another announcement for you all to do now, for yourselves and our OCs: Break Your Own '''Fourth Wall'''.
<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1195039493130199041</ref>''</blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' An abstract force that prevents people from talking to their OC's.

<blockquote>Our OCs in C-197 often break their '''fourth walls''', because they are aware of us, and it is our time and turn to return the favour.</blockquote>

Origin: Comes from the phrase "breaking the fourth wall", a figure of speech humorously used on characters that acknowledge the audience directly, or state their awareness of the media they're in. Chris has taken this to mean that all dimensions in the universe are separated by this kind of barrier, therefore calling them "the fourth wall". In a recent Twitter post, Chris has also stated that this mysterious force is the reason why people cannot see or interact with their OC's, but that the OC's themselves are fully aware of their creators, so will eventually break through the barrier every once in a while to speak to people of other dimensions.</blockquote>

;[[Friend Zone|friend zone]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The dreaded moment a sweetheart rejects you.

<blockquote>''A lot of times, especially if the friend in question is opposite of gender 18 or older, they may have sex on the brain. And when that person hears from you that you just want to be friends, or in the other term, put into the '''Friend Zone''', that person will feel like they failed at getting the sex they wanted, or Ever will from you.''<ref>[[August 2017 tweets]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' The lousiest excuse a sweetheart could give for not having sex with Chris.

<blockquote>''Nothing has happened in Women's Rights; the "Friend Zone" is only the LOUSIEST EXCUSE EVER to give to someone the woman deeply cares about and trusts so she could get out of sex or a relationship. I do not take kindly to that Excuse at this time.''<ref>[[Common Questions]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The Friend Zone refers to a relationship where one person desires romance, while the other only shows interest in friendship. Much like his stance on the Three-Date Rule, Chris believed that the Friend Zone is simply another rule explicitly placed on him by some unspecified authority to slow down his progress on completing his [[Love Quest]]. His belief that this is simply an "excuse" to avoid having sex with him reveals a lot on why he was [[Megan|overly-persistent with]] [[Wallflower|some of]] [[Doopie|his sweethearts]]. He couldn't imagine why any woman would not want to have sex with him, so he came to the conclusion that every woman he stalks are simply unfamiliar with sex and what goes into it.</blockquote>

;[[Fuzzy-wuzzies|fuzzy-wuzzies]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The rewards of giving Chris compliments.

<blockquote>''Compliments will get you '''fuzzy-wuzzies'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. Believed to be another example of Chris' random-access humor. May have been derived from an English assignment in [[Manchester High School|high school]], "[[Manchester High Leaks#Warm Fuzzies|Warm Fuzzies for Christian]]".

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#P|prickly-wicklies]]
</blockquote>

{{clear}}
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== G ==
|-
|

;[[Gal pal|gal-pal]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a female friend.

<blockquote>''And also, I would like to give a shout-out to...Ivy, sweet '''gal-pal''' of mine...and her friend Rachel across the hall from her, in a college within these United States!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Update_18_March_2009_More_Updated</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris rarely refers to any of his female friends as just "friends", simply because he thinks that all female friends have the potential to be [[CWC-isms#S|sweethearts]] before they're in the dreaded [[Friend Zone]]. Chris also states that due to his autism, this somehow means that he gets along much more easily with girls than with guys. <ref>Autism Tutorial Part 5</ref> Although this could be more due to the fact that he overall has had much better experiences with girls than with boys growing up, especially in high school. This has caused him to pick up more [[Transgender|effeminate traits and characteristics]]. The term "gal-pal" is typically used by women when they are talking to other people in their social clique. Chris therefore picked this phrase up from the girls he's talked to (possibly using the phrase because he sees himself as "one of the girls"). It is also common for [[homos]] to use this to refer to their female friends.
</blockquote>
;gawd
<blockquote>
1. ''(interjection)'' eye dialect of "god", Used in the place of "god" when it is used to express annoyance, shock, or pain.

<blockquote>''Life is f***ed up. (I had a real stressful Sunday afternoon) '''Gawd'''! Just... GAWD!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/2017_tweets#STRESSFUL_SUNDAY._GAWD.21</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Possibly meant to add dramatic effect to saying "god", which is already used to add dramatic effect.</blockquote>

;gaybian
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a male lesbian.

<blockquote>''Uh… simply put—and I am willing to say this… in sound mind and body: I… am a '''gaybian'''.''<ref>[[Chris_Comes_Out_of_the_Closet]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris only used this word once in the video [[Chris_Comes_Out_of_the_Closet]]. Before this video, [[Clyde Cash]] had threatened to harm [[Julie]] under the condition that Chris refuses to admit that he's gay. Chris being Chris, he had absolutely no idea that he was once again under another elaborate trolling scheme, and had no clue how to handle the situation. Chris thought he could be sly and admit to being gay, while also being attracted to women. Thus, he tacked on the word "gay" onto "lesbian" to create the word "gaybian" so that he can say that he's a "male lesbian", despite this being a complete contradiction within itself.</blockquote>

;geinus
[[Image:Robotnik.jpg|thumb|I'M A MAD GEINUS! [[Doctor Robotnik|ROBOTNIK]]! ROBOTNIK!]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a genius

<blockquote>''Robotnik! Robotnik! I'm a mad '''geinus'''! Robotnik, Robotnik!''<ref>[[Sonichu 1]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An accidental misspelling of "genius", this CWC-ism is the result of Chris's ability to spell, or lack thereof. In his futile attempts to spell words with "eni", he substitutes this with "ein", possibly due to his habit of spelling words phonetically.</blockquote>

;get it through your skulls
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' Used to clarify something to your fans
<blockquote>''So everybody '''get it through your skulls''', I'm the real deal.'' <ref>[[CCWC's Final Warning to the Second CWC]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this term a lot when trying to clarify various misconceptions about him, such as his straightness, and who the real CWC was. Variations of the phrase include "GET IT THROUGH YOUR THICK SKULLS", "Get it through your damn, dirty, immature skulls!", and "Get through your damn, dirty, stupid, idiotic, immature skulls".</blockquote>

;gitar
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' A guitar

Origin: How Chris pronounces the word "guitar".
</blockquote>

;give birth, give the birth
<blockquote>
1. ''(verb)'' To transfer possession of the state of having been born, by bearing as offspring.

<blockquote>''My mother and my father are both really nice, old-fashioned-type people who not only '''gave the birth'''--gave me birth at their ages...which my mother is sixty-six, currently, and my father is currently eighty. They both just turned that way in the last couple of months. And, uh, I was born in 1982. They gave me the birth...then, and, uh, anyway, it was so nice of--for them to give me the, uh, birth during the early [[1980s]].''<ref>[[Chris Chan's Public Announcement]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to think that a sentence like "Barbara gave birth to Christian" is grammatically equivalent to a sentence like "Barbara gave Go-bots to Christian."
</blockquote>

;GO!
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' Having a style similar to the cartoon ''Teen Titans Go!''.

<blockquote>''As MUCH, as I would like to agree; Cute as it may be, it is still '''GO!''' Version, and #GOPony is something we Really do not like.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1211396957203247104</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' Of a descent originating from [[Dimensions|dimension CZ-69]].

<blockquote>''Just; Most '''GO!''' individuals are...NO!!!''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1215833863718567937</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this CWC-ism to describe his distaste for the MLP:FiM spinoff series [[Pony Life]], believing it to be in the same vein as Teen Titans Go! due to its artstyle. He would go around on his [[Twitter]] account spamming Hasbro and/or users showing any interest in the show with some of his TSSSF cards as a means of protest using this euphemism to put it under a bad light.
</blockquote>

;go make a rhyme
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used by Chris to indicate that he is in a [[Chris and writing|poetic]] mood.

<blockquote> ''Oh, Back Off, '''go make a rhyme'''. Love will come your way in good time.<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/913230475774369794</ref> Keep Heart, Have hope and faith. Life is a coinkie-dink strafe. Have an open heart, don’t be afraid. Your sweetie is likely in your friendship parade.''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris intended to write a rhyme in order to sound poetic in a tweet, continuing with the rhyming schtick in several subsequent ones. Due to his own laziness, the best Chris could come up with in terms of words that rhyme with "time" is "rhyme".
</blockquote>

;[[Godjesus]]
[[Image:Jesusbot.jpg|thumb|This is who Chris actually believes in.]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(shorthand)'' God and Jesus Christ.

<blockquote> ''As I have guide, as I was guide [sic] by, uh, God and Jesus. And because I, uh, cheated on Ivy lately, '''Godjesus''' were mad at me, so, even though she r-, even though she requested the recent items of question, sex-, [quietly] sexual stuff--videos and pictures--I am being punished because the trolls are getting their hands on them.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Matthew_5:27,_CWC_Confessions</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And also, who I'd like to thank, '''GodJesus''', our God and our Lord and savior, for their support, for their support as well, I pray to them every day, and I follow, I am guided by Jesus.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Update_9_April_2009</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris appears to be somewhat aware of the Holy Trinity (Holy Spirit, Son, and Father), the three forms that God takes in mainstream Christianity. Despite accepting Jesus as the son of God, Chris believes that God and Jesus are essentially the same entity. As a result, whenever he mentions God, he is never reluctant to mention Jesus in the same sentence. Because of this, Chris made this CWC-ism as a shorthand of "God and Jesus". This CWC-ism was the primary inspiration for the term "[[Godbear]]" to humorously refer to [[Leonard Bearstein]], who Chris has credited for his name change. Chris now no longer uses his CWC-ism, now referring to both God and Jesus as separate [[OCs]]. Chris now calls God "Emmanuelle".</blockquote>

;grand number of pounds
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' Extremely heavy.

<blockquote> ''Note: The chair weighs a '''grand number of pounds'''!<ref>[[Power]]</ref>'</blockquote>

Origin: Used in a video where he tried to prove his strength to [[Vanessa Hudgens]], who was actually [[Joshua Martinez]], by lifting an office chair.
</blockquote>

;grinds my gears
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used by Chris to indicate he is annoyed with something.

<blockquote>Firstly, I got your image in my mailbox; while I thank you for your fanart, No Offense, but I do not appreciate Sonichu drawn looking retarded; I feel it '''grinds my gears''' a bit.<ref>[[Mailbag_2#In_which_Chris_insults_someone_who_drew_a_picture_for_him]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>Something that '''grinds my gears''' is how people are not accepting of the neutral terms of "darling" or "dear".<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:OpenLetter.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this phrase almost every time he wanted to indicate he was annoyed and not outright [[angry]]. It is believed that Chris has picked up this archaic phrase from [[Family Guy]], specifically from a segment from the show called "What Really Grinds My Gears", where Peter is talking about things that annoy him or "grinds his gears".

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== H ==
|-
|

;hand-drawing
[[Image:Chris holding a pencil.png|thumb|Chris holding a pencil|200px]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An original drawn image, as opposed to a facsimile of that image.

<blockquote>''I mean, does that look like a printout to you? No! It's a '''HAND-DRAWING'''! It's the original hand-drawing of the back cover I constantly used! Among all the other hand drawings on my SHELF! In my BINDERS! IN THIS ROOM! In this house!''<ref>[[Chris dispels videogame rumors]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(verb)'' To sketch without the aid of digital technology, such as a computer.
[[File:Sonichuipaddrawing2020.jpg|thumb|A non-example made by Chris.]]
<blockquote>''No, actually, what I thought, is that you skip the '''hand-drawing''' and you draw everything on your PhotoShop with your computer mouse.''<ref>[[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 2]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's process for producing his drawings is to draw them, by hand, on physical paper, and then scan the paper into his computer and use image editing software to add effects like lettering or (for the purpose of breaking the fourth wall) photographs. He takes comfort in the belief that ownership of the original paper drawings is evidence of his authorship and will frequently cite this in defense against perceived thieves and trolls.

Chris also thinks that drawing on a computer instead of paper is an inferior method of producing artwork; he thinks the results look "blocky and low-resolution," which probably speaks more to his [[:File:179-ShineSchuChara.jpg|his own experience using MSPaint]] than the artistic quality of, for example, [[Asperchu]]. The fact that a digital artist like Alec Benson Leary is nonetheless ''using his hands'' does not seem to have occurred to Chris.
</blockquote>

;Haterade

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a metaphorical drink consumed by haters.
<blockquote>''Therefore, for all of you '''Haterade'''-Chugging “GET A JOB!” spouters out there, I suggest you Shut Up and enjoy your ability to settle in a cozy Office or wherever. For the rest of us, the worlds and the dimensions are our Offices, and we are doing our best, so we can reach our respective Fated Destined Promotions. But, I Digress. <ref>[[June 2019 social media posts#Fan art isn't thoughtful when it feeds into Chris's delusions]]</ref>''</blockquote>

<blockquote>''Put down the '''Haterade'''; this is not going against any rules, it is just the way it is. Hey! I still have my flaws, so I am definitely Not a Mary Sue type of OC. Also, if I wanted a shot glass of '''Haterade''', I would read most anything this dimension’s @realDonaldTrump ever wrote.''<ref>[[June 2019 social media posts#Fan art isn't thoughtful when it feeds into Chris's delusions]]</ref></blockquote></blockquote>

<blockquote>2. ''(noun, informal)'' excessive negativity, criticism, or resentment.

<blockquote>''This is in reference to the Nypical '''Haterade''' Comment of “Get A Job” that is not only thrusted upon me, but to everyone who is creative and have powerful in their own respective, individual rights.<ref>[[June 2019 social media posts#Fan art isn't thoughtful when it feeds into Chris's delusions]]</ref>''</blockquote>

Origin: Originally said by Lars in the 2010 [[Lars Call]]. Chris then used it almost nine years later. Likely a pun on the sports drink Gatorade.
</blockquote>
;[[heart level]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's way of measuring his emotional state

<blockquote>''100% Change the number to change your '''heart level''' and you can write a sentence to indicate how you feel.''<ref>[[Heart_level]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The concept of the "heart level" most likely stems from Chris's inability to understand emotions. As an alternative, Chris tends to use video game terms in order to measure such emotions.</blockquote>

;heal
<blockquote> 1. ''(verb)'' to ejaculate into someone.

<blockquote>''Had I Not '''healed''' her, she would be dead Late August.''<ref>[[Jail Letter - 16 November 2021]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris had somehow come to the conclusion that sex with his mother would make her more youthful, hence "healing" her.

</blockquote>

;heartsweet
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a [[sweetheart]].

<blockquote>''Rosey, as often as birds tweet, will you be my lovely '''heartsweet'''?''<ref>"[[Sonichu's Ode to Rosechu]]"</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Rearrangement of "sweetheart," possibly coined initially to provide more rhyming options in poetry. Chris primarily uses this term in Sonichu's dialogue, as the character's pet name for Rosechu. When speaking for himself, Chris tends to prefer "sweetheart," although the trolls use "heartsweet" in conversation with him.

''See also: [[sweetbolt]]''
</blockquote>

;heavyweight
[[File:Studalert.png|thumb|Chris does NOT look like Chris Farley]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Stockboy; person employed to move heavy objects and perform other menial labor.

<blockquote>If she gets pregnant and can't work, then I would be working. I would be working VERY HARD AND HEAVILY. [...] If I have to I would be, get one of the '''heavyweights''', that just moves the boxes around the, stock the shelves at a grocery store.<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' heavy.

<blockquote>I do not think Chris Farley looks like me at all, plus he was a LOT more '''heavyweight''' than me, and he was more wild than me.<ref>[[Jackie_e-mails_Part_2]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, as usual, has to repurpose words rather than use the existing words that already mean what he wants to say.
</blockquote>

;hedgehog-defensive (or hedgehog)
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Protecting oneself by curling up into a ball, just like a [[Sonic the Hedgehog|hedgehog]].

<blockquote>And I do understand all that. Believe me, and I need not be reminded of the worst part, but my '''hedgehog-defensive''' state and all of the tears and leaking mucus and whole body paralysis that happened to me then and there will haunt me in reminder of that.<ref>[[TooManyGames#Personal_space_talk]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>@MLPSilverQuill, having one’s own spirit killed is really not fun nor funny at all. And, believe me, I was literally in a worse huddled position than what I see here, and I FELT DEVASTATED at that moment. I went full '''Hedgehog Defensive''' and let my quills keep others back. It Hurts<ref>[[April_2019_social_media_posts#Hedgehog-defensive_state]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Replacing the likes of his [[Megatron pistol]] and his [[pepper spray]], Chris has adapted the habit of rolling up into a ball to protect himself from unwanted physical contact. The protective state he dubs "the hedgehog-defensive state" is most likely based off of the spin-dash attack from the Sonic the Hedgehog franchise, which the titular character uses to attack foes.</blockquote>

;[[hermaphrodite]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A derogatory term for passing transgender women, particularly those that haven't gotten bottom surgery.

<blockquote>''OH MY GOD!!! UGH!!! ARE YOU REALLY A '''HERMAPHRODITE'''?! I'm sorry, but that naughty picture just really shocked me and made me want to throw up. *deep breath* You do have a pretty face, but what happened just now is just like the movie, "The Crying Game", or the Thanksgiving episode of "The Cleveland Show".''<ref>[[Mailbag 25#It's a trap, again!]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' A person of an ambiguous gender, or who is female, who also has a penis.

<blockquote>If a '''Hermaphrodite''', I would raise it to be male regardless since it would not have any eggs anyway. Plus big bonus for (him) in sex with all women (lesbians included I would imagine).<ref>[[List of OkCupid Answers]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin:A misuse of the archaic term for intersex people. Chris appears to use this term to refer to someone he deems as "almost a woman", which is also shown when he referred to some of his female characters as "all female" when having their penises removed. Chris used this term when he noticed that the sweetheart [[Bailey Jay]] had a penis, and she explained to him her experiences as a transwoman. Chris also notably talked about how if he had a "hermaphrodite" as one of his offspring, he'd raise them as a boy. Chris's rather specific usage of this term also shows some of his prior beliefs about gender before he transitioned himself, such as who he deemed "male" or "female" in the first place.</blockquote>

;[[HEXBox]]
[[File:KillThatHexBawx.jpg|thumb|]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any of the video game consoles made by Microsoft, primarily the Xbox 360.

<blockquote>I never cared for the '''HEXBox''', and frankly it LACKS heavily in comparison to the Wii and PS3, PLUS YOU HAVE TO PAY THEIR FEES TO EVEN GO ONLINE OR DOWNLOAD DEMOS WITH IT.</blockquote>

Origin: Due to his [[Chris and brand loyalty|Brand Loyalty]], Chris had an irrational hatred for the XBox, simply because of how much you've got to pay for it to access some of its content<ref>[[Mailbag_5]]</ref>. Because Chris viewed this device as a curse to humanity, he tacked the word "hex", which is defined as being a curse, onto the original name of the console.</blockquote>

;hide behind/under his mother's skirt
<blockquote>1. ''(idiom)'' To behave in a cowardly, immature fashion.

<blockquote>''You come to me now. Come face me like a man. Unless you want to continue being called a cow-a quivelling coward who '''hides under his mother's skirt'''.''<ref>[[Challenge for Clyde II]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An antiquated phrase alluding to children literally hiding behind their mother's skirts when frightened.
</blockquote>

;hippo on one's head
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A predicament or unpleasant situation one is currently facing

<blockquote>''I'M WET. I'M COLD. THERE'S A HIPPO ON MY HEAD. AND CLEARLY, I'M NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO DO THIS ON MY OWN.''<ref>[[:File:JailArt15.jpg]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Someone's [[wikipedia:Hippocampus|hippocampus]]

<blockquote>''(EVERYBODY has a Hippo on their head; it is called the Hippocampus)''<ref>[[:File:FSM2.PNG]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris states in an e-mail directed at [[Regina Novakova]] that the phrase originated as an example of his [[random-access humor]], apparently as a pun of the word "hippocampus". Following from this, he would famously use the term in a [[HippoOnYourHead|Flipnote animation]] of a person literally getting crushed by a falling hippo, and then use the term several more times to describe the "weight" of the hippo on people's heads. He has lately used this term to describe his struggles with being in jail in a drawing sent to [[Praetor]].

</blockquote>

;[[homo]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A male homosexual

<blockquote>''Yes; the '''Homos''' I have heard from try to push their damn lifestyle in my face, and I DO NOT CARE FOR THAT AT ALL; What they do behind closed doors is None Of My Business, and I still Do Not Care to know a Damn Thing about it.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Common_Questions''</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' A non-passing transgender woman, particularly one Chris doesn't deem an authentic woman

<blockquote>''So I would- so I would say, good luck being a fake woman because you'll never be able to achieve true femdom! And you'll always be a dang homosexual male, 'cuz you're born that way, you gonna to stay that way pretty much even if you're gonna- if you're gonna have your dick either chopped off or tucked in! People are still gonna look at you so ill. In the majority of this country.''

''Anyway, that's my response for now.''

''Damn '''homo'''.''<ref>[[Response to ADF]]</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(adjective)'' homosexual

<blockquote>''Every one of you who thinks I'm '''homo''' and calls me that—-because I am not; I'm straight! I'm straight!''<ref>[[CWC's_Second_Message]]</ref></blockquote>

4. ''(adjective)'' relating to homosexuals

<blockquote>''Again, to reiterate the issue, THE GOD DAMN F***IN' '''Homo''' Ads MUST BE GONE!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Blog</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Before the [[Tomgirl Saga]], Chris had a hatred for homosexuals, out of fear that he'll become one himself. Even uttering words like "gay" and "homosexual" would make him uncomfortable. Chris also believed that those that strayed too much from their assigned gender at birth would turn out as being gay, which explains his defensiveness towards his more effeminate traits.</blockquote>

;[[Honest Content|honest]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' NSFW, containing adult content.

<blockquote>''Parental Advisory - VERY '''HONEST''' content.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic10P97.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris only has a slightly good understanding of what honesty is. However, Chris doesn't seem to understand when it's most appropriate to be honest. In his mind, to attract mates, he has to be honest all of the time, even if this includes instances of his sexual misadventures. Chris knows that he's not supposed to discuss such topics publically with ordinary people, so he would have to keep such things in secret. Therefore, in his mind, it would be the honest thing to do to discuss such actions.
</blockquote>

;Hurtful Truth Level
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A point at which honest criticism should be stopped so as to avoid hurting a person's feelings, regardless of the usefulness of the advice.

<blockquote>''And another thing, When constantly exceeding that '''Hurtful Truth Level''' to me, it feels like to me you're, and you may as well have, told me, "I Hate You! I Hate You!", and forget about me.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 23]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Said in an email to Jackie after she had pointed out several glaring flaws in Chris's lifestyle and personality. Rather than take her criticism to heart and improve himself, he got angry and defensive, wishing that she would show sympathy for him instead.
</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== I ==
|-
|

;I can feel the cosmos
[[File:I can feel the cosmos.jpg|thumb|right]]
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Statement of achievement and oneness with the universe.

<blockquote>''I promise, uh, three da—three pages a day, drawn or colored, but, also with the, uh, website, and God/Jesus's support, I feel like... we will be seeing many new—many new thing. The website will be better. '''I can feel the cosmos!''' Peace.''<ref>[[CWC Update 9 April 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Inspired by a line from the game Katamari Damacy, [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UmWxNFq6_3U "Oh, I feel it. I feel the cosmos."]
</blockquote>

;I got a fish

<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Claim that one owns a fish.

<blockquote>'''''I got a fish!''' Would ya like to make a wish?''
''I got a fish Would ya like to make a wish?''
''I got a fiiiiiiiiish! Would ya like to make a wish?''<ref>[[I_Got_A_Fish]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in a song of the same name, where Chris' [[random-access humor]] shines.</blockquote>

;I HATE ME TOO!!!

<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' A self-destructive phrase used to attempt to gain pity from trolls

<blockquote>''You know what, '''I HATE ME TOO!!!'''''<ref>[[You know what, I HATE ME TOO!!!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used as part of the title of a gallery found on Chris’s [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] Page.
</blockquote>

;[[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD]]!
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expressed angrily when you wish to break someone apart to kill them

<blockquote>''Jason Kendrick Howell... you BASTARD! BASTARD! You hacked into everything! You have driven me so beyond the wall, I can't even DESCRIBE it! YOU'RE LAUGHING NOW, BUT... '''I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD!''' Goodbye!''<ref>[[Jason Kendrick Howell message]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used as a [[death threat]] to [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] after he has hacked Sonichu.net.</blockquote>

;IBAChandler
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Abbreviation for "I be a chandler," i.e., "I am a person named 'Chandler.'"

<blockquote>''I am so sick of hearing that stupid name that somebody made up back when I had that '''IBAChandler''' account, and I be a Chandler. You know, "I" being myself, "B" standing for specifying who I am, and "Chandler" being my last name.''<ref>[[Show RESPECT to me, "C"CWC]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(proper noun)'' [[YouTube]] username in use by Christian Weston Chandler during his conflict with [[Liquid Chris]], leading trolls to accuse Chris of being an impostor of Liquid named [[Ian Brandon Anderson]].

3. ''(proper noun)'' Name of a ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' villain based upon Liquid Chris, ironically named for the real Chris's alias.

<blockquote>'''''I B A Chandler''', And I am here to copycatly sieze claim of you hedgehogs and this city from your absent mayor's domain.''<ref>[[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], page 79</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Inspired by [[Bob Chandler]]'s license plate, "I B MR C" ("I be Mister C.").<ref>[[CWC Update 29 July 2009]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;ID
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' Identifying.

<blockquote>''"That is the difference between Trans Gender and Vestites; '''ID''' as the other sex, and dressing like it, respectively"''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-335#post-2635076]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Possibly derived from ID meaning "Identification". </blockquote>

;[[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the extremely high probability that any woman Chris talks to is not [[CWC-isms#boyfriend-free|boyfriend-free]].

<blockquote>''With the '''infinitely high Boyfriend-Factor''', I am not fond of about 99.999999999996% of the total male population, with a margin-of-error of the 4 billionth of a percent (for about 100 men) of whom are okay acquaintences.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Megan_emails,_Aug-Dec_2007</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In general, Chris will almost never find a sweetheart.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sweetheart#Will_Chris_ever_have_a_Sweetheart.3F</ref> Already aware of this fact, but not willing to admit he's not at all attractive to most women, Chris blames it on the fact that most men are "jerks", and that one probably is already dating the woman he's trying to latch onto.</blockquote>
;information overload

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An act of spamming a webpage with pictures.

<blockquote>''I had thought the '''Information Overload''' would somehow Take Down the page; I admit that I was mistaken.<ref>[[Chris chan (CWCipedia)]]</ref>''</blockquote>

Origin: When Chris saw all of the explicit pictures on his Encyclopedia Dramatica page, he decided that the best course of action would be to spam the article with his own pictures. His logic was that if he kept doing this faster than the other editors, they'd have to delete the article, as they just wouldn't catch up with him.
</blockquote>

;instinction

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An instance of something being used a certain way.

<blockquote>''Also, I would have the secondary definition of the word "gay", being Homosexual, REMOVED from the word in the dictionaries, and all '''instinctions''' and sayings of the word will ONLY LEGALLY be used to mean HAPPY, as it was originally intended among songs like "Deck the Halls"''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_and_English</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Once again an instance of Chris trying to sound smart by using a word that sounds foreign to him, made up or otherwise. The end result, however, gives the impression that Chris isn't familiar with the word "instances".

</blockquote>

;intersex

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Relating to any gender identity outside of the gender binary.

<blockquote>''As a Tomgirl, '''Intersex''' of Female Soul with Male Body, and a Tranny Cross-Dresser, I am in full support for Human Equal Rights for everyone."''<ref>[[August 2014 Facebook Posts#Chris comes out... kinda]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used the term "intersex" interchangeably with the term "transgender" on many occasions, and also uses it to refer to Silvana, who actually is intersex. This gives the impression that when he talks about something being "intersex", he means that it isn't entirely "male" or "female".

</blockquote>

;[[Iron Curtain|iron curtain]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The mostly hermetic seal between [[Reality Cartoon]]s, such as the [[Chris and reality|real world]] and the fictional universe containing [[CWCville]], that prevents the [[Dimensional Merge]] from proceeding.

<blockquote>''But we are getting increasing magics, here, with more and more opening portals and growing tears and cracks in the '''iron curtain'''''.<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-11-19-chris-begs-while-posting-creepy-photo-of-barb.63305/post-5610374 Twitter, 19 November 2019]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Coined by Sir Winston Churchill in 1946 to refer to the limits of Russian intrusion into central Europe after the War. Chris presumably heard it once in [[Manchester High School|history class]] and forgot what it meant, unless he is comparing his fictional world to the [[Chris and censorship|Soviet Union]]. Alternatively it was fed to him by the [[Idea Guys]].

''See Also:'' [[#F|fourth wall]]</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== J ==
|-
|
;Jail of Fail
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. A rather unappealing jail to reside in.

<blockquote>''I have a temporary Soul Partner, a Holy Flame Type, you may Remember her (on her repentence tour) keeping me safe, well, not abused, and good, alongside Many (Good) Angels, Spirits, and OP allies in and around this '''Jail of Fail'''. We presently have a genuine Turkish Prayer Rug and a deck of Playing Cards from the Commisary, along with very much appreciated Sports Bra, Socks with no holes, Earplugs, and a few other goodies.''<ref>[[Jail Letter - 4 October 2021]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Said in a letter to the long-time orbiter and enabler, [[Kenneth Engelhardt]].

</blockquote>

;janekop
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. A female [[CWC-isms#jerkop|jerkop]].

<blockquote>''YOU'RE UNDER ARREST. SO SAYS THIS '''JANEKOP'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Feelings_of_the_election_results</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Whereas the term "jerkop" is a portmanteau of the CWC-ism "jerk" and the word "cop", janekop is a portmanteau of the words "jane" and "cop". The word "jane" is a slang word for "woman". <ref>https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/jane</ref>
</blockquote>
;[[JERKS|jerk]]
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. Any male other than Chris and his dad in general, particularly those that Chris dislikes, especially one that gets in the way of his LoveQuest.

<blockquote>''On the flip side, I feel discomfort around men, because they can be such mean and cruel '''jerks'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_Girls</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The term "jerk" is generally defined as "A person with unlikable or obnoxious qualities and behavior, typically mean, self-centered or disagreeable".<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/jerk#Etymology_1</ref> As stated in the quote above, Chris believes that all men to be cruel, selfish, and overall unlikeable. Therefore, he views almost all men as jerks.
</blockquote>
;[[Jerkop|jerkop]]
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. An official of the law.

<blockquote>''I would have left peacefully, in fact, I was ready to go, but I had a prepared speech to say to them stupid '''Jerkops'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Get-Tar_Region</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Since Chris views most officers of the law as jerks, due to how often they'd thwart his LoveQuest, the term is a portmanteau of "jerk" and "cop". Possibly a pun on the word "jerkoff", which is defined as being "a contemptible man".<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/jerk--off</ref></blockquote>

;[[For Julie's Eyes Only|JULAAAAAAAY]]
[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|thumb|Chris preparing for hanky-panky with Julie, using a blow-up doll no less]]
<blockquote>''(interjection)'' 1. An expression used by Chris to indicate how much he'd love having sex for the first time with [[Julie]]

<blockquote>"Oh, Julie...'''JULAAAAAY''', JULAAAAAAAAAAY!!!"<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/For_Julie%27s_Eyes_Only</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris first shouted this infamous CWC-ism in the video [[For Julie's Eyes Only]]. He originally intended to share this video privately with [[Julie]], (unaware that 'she' was actually a 13-year-old male troll), to show what their first date would amount to, despite this breaking his Three Date Rule. Seeing how Chris was somewhat of a porn junkie,<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Chris%27s_Adam_%26_Eve_purchases</ref><ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Miyamoto_emails#Chris_Sets_the_Record_STRAIGHT</ref> Chris must have picked up that during sexual intercourse, one of the people may shout the name of the other person in order to "spice up" the orgy. When the video got leaked soon after, the term started to be used by trolls humorously, to the point where [[weens]] started using the phrase in excess, making the CWC-ism lose its luster.</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;jumping the shark
<blockquote>''(verb)'' 1. To start over from scratch

<blockquote>"I am moving out of this Twitter into creating a new one I created, @CPU_CWCSonichu. New and renewed followers will all be screened by my ally, as to keep out the Haters and Harassers. Starting up new and fresh. '''Jumping The Shark''' from old to new"<ref>[[Misc texts#CPU_CWCSonichu]]</ref>

</blockquote>

Origin: The term "jumping the shark" humorously refers to the point where something once popular which has begun to lose its viewer base pulls an extreme stunt in hopes of garnering attention. The term comes from an episode of the television show ''Happy Days'', where Fonzie literally jumped over a shark while water skiing. Ironically enough, despite Chris' misuse of the phrase, many people could easily say that the comic of Sonichu and Chris as a person have "jumped the shark" several times, especially with [[Retroactive continuity in Sonichu|retcons]] and- of course- Chris's change into a [[Transgender|transwoman]].

</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== K ==
|-
|
;kawaii
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' cute or adorable.

<blockquote>''That look really suits you; you look so '''kawaii''' and cool.😊''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1209184205776797697</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The mainstream Japanese word typically used to describe cute subculture. Chris has used this word in almost all cases where he describes anything he thinks is cute and cuddly, more so in recent times, where the use of this word is no longer taken seriously, and seen as more of a joke to poke fun at [[Joshua Wise|weeaboos]].</blockquote>

;[[Kick the Autistic]]
[[File:CWC gets kicked.jpg|thumb|A self-administered kick]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' America's favorite game

<blockquote>''I REALLY WANTED THAT TRIP SO I COULD HAVE A CHANCE TO IMPRESS MY SWEETEST MEGAN AND POSSIBLY FULFILL MY DREAM OF GETTING MARRIED AND SOON HAVE A DAUGHTER NAMED CRYSTAL. YET NOW I, A FRUSTRATED HIGH-FUNCTIONALLY AUTISTIC 25-YEAR OLD VIRGIN, HAVE BEEN BALLZ-BROKEN LIKE I HAVE THROUGH A BIG CHUNK OF MY LIFE IN AMERICA'S FAVORITE GAME, '''"KICK THE AUTISTIC!"''' *sigh*''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chop_Chop_Master_Onion%27s_Rap_Showdown</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Any action which involves doing something to Chris that he doesn't like

<blockquote>''And if you have so much free time to play the cruelest game of '''"KICK THE AUTISTIC"''', then you CAN and SHOULD put the time to better use; volunteer for a social chore; take up the culture in tasteful art; go out and socialize.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica#21_January</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(noun)'' Any form of discrimination towards Chris for being [[autism|autistic]].

<blockquote>''And so, the world continues to play the world's favorite game of "'''Kick the Autistic'''". I'm gonna need all the luck I can get. *Game Over*''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Vivitheg%27s_AIM_chat</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris had this paranoid idea that the whole world is going against him and his goals, solely due to his autism. In this sense, the fact that so many people supposedly wanted to thwart his goals made him feel like he was being "kicked" around. </blockquote>

;Kra-Kow!

<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase indicating that Chris roasted someone.

<blockquote>''What? I’m just telling the truth. I hear and see WORSE shit from you Haters. At this point, I’d rather look back in that memory than PTSD over y’all’s Hate-Filled content. '''Kra-Kow!'''''<ref>https://mobile.twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1231269768310722560</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. Most likely inspired by the sound lightning makes.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== L ==
|-
|

;Laughs Under Lucricities
<blockquote>
1. ''(backronym)'' backronym for "LULZ"

<blockquote>''Although, F.Y.I., "LULZ" is short for "'''Laughs Under Lucricities'''"''<ref>[[Chris chan (CWCipedia)]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Any form of humor made at Chris' expense

<blockquote>''... your bully of a boyfriend is the Original Author of the "Chris-chan" page that was put up there for the "LULZ", "'''Laughs Under Lucricities'''". Which I don't have to tell you is not only mean and cruel, the page is HORRIBLE''<ref>Chris emails 2008</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: It's likely that Chris first heard of lulz on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]-<ref>[[Chris E-mails 2008#August]]</ref> the slogan of which is "in lulz we trust"- and thus forever associated the term with trolling. Originally he would simply say "LULZ" ''ought'' to stand for "Laughs Under Lucricities," but he soon began implying that it already does.<ref>[[Chris_E-mails_2008|Email]] from Chris to Robert Simmons V on 12 August 2008</ref> Lucricities is seemingly a combination of "lucrid" (another non-word with apparent negative connotations that Chris has used<ref>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 48]]</ref>) and "ludicrous" but falls short of being a portmanteau and is more like the result of a head-on collision of the English language.

</blockquote>

;lesbian soul
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' What Chris believes to be his true [[Chris and sexuality|sexuality]].

<blockquote>''I am an all-around, good natured, high-functioning autistic, Female '''Lesbian Soul''', and Transwoman, artist, gamer and creative type.''<ref>https://www.facebook.com/pg/cwcville/about/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: When Chris declared himself transgender, he continued to be attracted to exclusively to biological females regardless of their own sexual orientation.<ref>[[Women Only Need Apply - No STD's]]</ref> Thus, Chris became a lesbian. As a way to assert to detractors that he was a lesbian, Chris cited himself as having a "lesbian soul" despite previously living as a straight man for thirty years.

 </blockquote>
;level-up king
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' Master of [[card games]].

<blockquote>''There must have been about 6 people including Chris and myself at the tourney and when he won he was jumping up and down a yelling "I'm the '''level up king'''!"''<ref>[[Mimms and Lucas Q&A#Follow-up]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Before his permanent ban from the [[GAMe PLACe]], Chris would play games of Pokemon and Yu-Gi-Oh with some of the other customers. Despite his sick obsession with both games, Chris never developed any type of strategy to compete with other players, making it very difficult to succeed at the game, even when he played against small children. Eventually, when the shop was just down to six people, which included Chris, the manager, [[Daniel Mimms|Mimms]], and [[Lucas]], Chris did win a match against a relatively new player, and excitedly jumped up and down at this accomplishment like a child. Along with this, he shouted the phrase "I AM THE LEVEL-UP KING!"</blockquote>

;like, you know
<blockquote>1. ''(discourse particle)'' Space filler during sentence.

<blockquote>''I don't want too much conflict to happen, '''like, you know'''. You wouldn't want too much conflict to happen, like, you know. I mean-like, you know, between you and him any further. Yeah.''<ref>[[I Love You Kacey]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris' speech consists mostly of uh's, um's, and other vocalized pauses.</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;live from home once again
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' An introduction stating that one is recording themselves from their home.

<blockquote> ''Hello everybody this is Christine Chandler coming to you '''live from home once again''' and we're going to talk about the recent and more obvious topic, of "The Dimensional merge". Yes! This dimension! Right here! 1218. Is going to be merged with our sister dimension "C197" where all of our s- where most of our superheroes, super-villains, OCs, and what have you, and other characters, consisted, have been existing and co-existing. Yep!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Dimensional_Merge_Announcements</ref></blockquote>

Origin: This phrase became Chris's typical means of starting his videos since late 2015, replacing the famous Captain's Log. Although it is sometimes used appropriately (i.e. livestreams), Chris uses the phrase even in prerecorded videos that are not, in fact, live.</blockquote>

;[[Love Quest]]
<blockquote>1.''(noun)'' Chris's former on-going search for a sweetheart.

<blockquote>''As for Wes, I blame all of these happenings on him. If he had not taken my life-long friend away from me, I might have a Pretty Girlfriend today. And I would not have had to set out on endeavoring '''LOVE QUEST'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Since attending [[PVCC]], Chris has embarked on a 15-year long quest to find his true love. Chris constantly failing to achieve this goal was what gave this CWC-ism its name.</blockquote>

;lovehog
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A lover in a relationship between two [[CWC-isms#E|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]].

<blockquote>''Also, I have finished the drawing for you, and I have shown off the Original '''LoveHog''' Couple's Wedding Rings, and their three children: Cerah Rosey, Robbie Sonee and (Shiney Rosey) Christine Rosey.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Katie_Bay_E-mails_4</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A portmanteau of "love" and "hedgehog".</blockquote>

;lucricities
<blockquote>1. ''(pl. noun)'' lurid acts or motivations

Origin: Chris completely made this word up, presumably based on "lucrid," which may in turn be based on the actual word "lurid." According to Chris, the word "lulz" can mean either "Laughs at my expense" or "Laughs under lucricities," so presumably the two contexts are equivalent.
</blockquote>

;lucrid
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' obscene, profane, wicked
<blockquote>''And promoting the hatred, and...drawing such loose—such '''lucrid''' mockeries is not gonna further the story plot or have anything new created, or even gonna help in any way...''<ref name=csm>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. Possibly a corruption of "lurid," given the context. Alternatively, it might be a corruption of "ludicrous." Chris has used this word to describe the homoerotic/dickgirl art on the ED page, as well as the fan comic in which he was depicted as a man-baby. Ironically, even before Chris used this word
</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== M ==
|-
|

;make one's own peeps n' poops

<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' to urinate and deficate at the same time

<blockquote>''Uh, actually, uh, actually Crystal is uh, doing, is uh, doing her preschool homework, and uh, Reg-, and Reginald's been uh, been a messy lil' babychild! '''Made his lil' peeps n' poops'''! And he went, and he went weewee all over the bathroom.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/PlayingHouse''</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from a clip of Family Guy, where Herber the Pervert is letting his dog out to "make his pees n' poops". <ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZtlwEfZEmrg</ref></blockquote>

;Mama
[[File:Christine and pikachu.jpg|right|thumb|Mama Christine with a [[Sonee]].]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' What Chris refers to himself as when roleplaying as one of his [[OCs]].

<blockquote>''I am going to some shopping and donating amongst the artists affected by the COVID virus of this Dimension, on behalf of '''Mama''', Chris Chan Sonichu. Thank you, again, to the individual who bought the book set recently. Still waiting for the set of #TSSSF cards to sign and offer.''<ref>https://mobile.twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1251259373810302977</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes himself to be a parent to his characters. Since he identifies as a woman, he has given himself the alias “Mama”. Chris further shows his lack of self-awareness by not realizing how awkward it is to have anyone, even his own characters (who are presumably teenagers) refer to him as such.</blockquote>

;[[Manajerks|manajerk]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a store manager

<blockquote>'' two Manajerks asked me to leave, because they said that I was loitering; I was NOT!''<ref>[[CWC's Diary#2005]] (20 July)</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A portmantau of "manager" and "jerk". </blockquote>

;[[Mary Lee Walsh|Mary Lee Walshing]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' akin to to Mary Lee Walsh

<blockquote>''She has proven herself to be a cold-hearted, uncaring, uncompassionate, lack-of-understanding, bigoted, discriminating, selfish, '''Mary Lee Walshing''', Witch Bitch!''<ref>[[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Chris Expresses His Outrage for Walmart]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's ongoing resentment against his old college dean has led him to compare a Wal-Mart manager who banned him from her store to Walsh. He apparently fails to comprehend that the "-ing" suffix is generally associated with verbs.</blockquote>

;mashed potato grenade

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a [[Wikipedia:Stielhandgranate|Stielhandgranate]], a special German hand grenade with a handle.

<blockquote>''I want to just kill him; destroy his goody-two-shoes nature, soul, heart and all that shit my '''mashed potato grenade''' could shatter, but leave his body in tact, so I'm not committed fro murder.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2013_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in a Facebook post sent to [[Megan Schroeder]] accusing her of his [[List of places that have banned Chris|ban]] from the [[The GAMe PLACe|Game Place]], where he [[Chris and reality|makes paranoid claims]] of what she, [[Mimms]], [[Lucas]], and [[Snyder]] were thinking that day. A corruption of "potato masher grenade", a common English nickname of the Stielhandgranate<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stielhandgranate</ref>.</blockquote>

;[[Mass debating|mass debate]]
[[File:Mass_Debate.jpg|right|thumb|Massive Debating]]
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' to pleasure one's self; to masturbate

<blockquote>''I've actually done it '''mass debating''' to myself so many times, even with a hunk of - even with an inflatable plastic woman...''<ref>[[Kacey Call 7]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: This particular euphemism comes from Chris's tendency to refrain from using inappropriate language, as well as his unusual variation of a southern accent combined with a minor speech impediment.</blockquote>

;mental block

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's autism

<blockquote>''And, uh, during my high school years, I was used to being surrounded by… girls… in my circle, and after having to, uh, leave them I felt ever so lonesome. And, after the stress from some of the people—people at PVCC, as well as my '''mental block''' of autism, it became hard from me to approach gir—approach the girls like I used to.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_Chan%27s_Public_Announcement</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris refers to his [[autism]] as a "mental block" because he believes the term refers to a disability. In his case, his supposed disability to socialize with girls. In reality, a mental block is the inability to remember a specific thing at a given moment. <ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mental_block</ref></blockquote>

;Meta

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' being able to break through the fourth wall.

<blockquote>''Also, there is no problem with breaking your own fourth wall with us from your dimension, here. Go '''Meta'''. We are certainly Meta with and for you all as well.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1316825180610670592</ref></blockquote>

Origin: From the Greek prefix meaning "after" or "beyond". Chris views all cartoons as being on a dimension higher than our own. According to him, being able to break through the iron curtain entails obtaining a higher mode of consciousness.
</blockquote>

;mislabel

<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' to put a label on Chris or any of his creations in a way he doesn't like, regardless of truth
2. ''(noun)'' a label of such slanderous nature; see also "misunderstanding"
<blockquote>''I am NOT a Dictator. Why are you giving me an even WORSE '''Mislabeling''' than the Homosexual Mislabelings? Why do YOU have to be so bored that you have to make up NEW mislabelings to try and deface me over and over again? ''<ref>[[Common Questions#1_February_2010]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Just about everywhere. He appears to use this term as often as the word "slanderous". Curiously, the redundancy "ill-mislabeling" (as if there were any other kind) has appeared once.<ref>[[CWC Blog#28_December_2009]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;misspeak

<blockquote>1.''(verb)'' to lie

<blockquote>''Sometimes, I have '''misspoke'''. But you are more important to me than ANYTHING. Believe me! I swear. Hand to God. And on my Bible. I'd have to go look for it.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/ToJackie</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Instead of accepting that someone has called him out on [[Lies|his bullshit]], Chris prefers to say he "misspoke". Needless to say, no one has fallen for this ploy.

</blockquote>

;misunderstanding

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a deliberate view that contradicts Chris; see also "mislabel"
<blockquote>''*AND WE WILL NOT TAKE THE '''MISUNDERSTANDINGS''', THE MISLABELS, AND ALL THE LIKE SITTING DOWN!!!''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|1=Issue_9/Page_39|2=Issue 9 Page 39}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Misappropration. Note that it is not, as in reality,<ref>[http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/misunderstanding Merriam-Webster Dictionary, "misunderstanding"]</ref> a mistaken notion (alternatively a dispute) based on faulty information, but a malicious action worthy of [[tard rage]]. Apparently a slanderous troll has to actively "misunderstand" Chris. Also, Chris has used the related word "misunderstood" (participle adjective) as an insult, not realizing that if the troll misunderstood (transitive verb) him, ''Chris'' would be the one that was misunderstood (participle adjective).<ref>[[Mailbag 39#Rosechu_the_transwoman|Mailbag 39]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;modnar
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' random

<blockquote>''I may be '''modnar''', but I try not to be offensive, and if I do, then I am sorry. I can not please Everyone.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter</ref></blockquote>

Origin: "Random", spelt backwards.</blockquote>

;[[Monthly tugboat|monthly tugboat]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's Social Security Disability Service

<blockquote>"I'm getting by livin' with my folks and a '''monthly tugboat.'''"<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Monthly_tugboat#References_by_Chris</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris apparently coined the term "Monthly Tugboat" due to a comparison he makes between gaining money through his SSDS vs. winning the lottery. In his mind, winning the lottery is like riding a "Luxury ship that can easily sink", while gaining money from the government is the same as getting cargo from a ship pulled by a tugboat. <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/BlueSpike_Skype_Logs_12</ref></blockquote>

;morrow

<blockquote> 1. ''(noun)'' Synonym for moral.

<blockquote>''The '''Morrow''' remains: Look up to whoever and whatever you like as your childhood hero like no one else is watching you; remain proud with your choice and preference. 💜⚡️''<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts#Chris supports playing with whatever toys you want]]</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: Unknown, possibly a corruption of the word moral. Used exclusively by Magi-Chan during Chris month-long twitter roleplay in August and September of 2019.
</blockquote>

;Mother Nature errand
<blockquote>1. ''(idiom)'' The bodily urge to either [[Piss|urinate]] or [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|defecate]].

<blockquote>''All right, well, ladies, it’s been fun, but I gotta split and take care of ah... y’know, a '''Mother Nature errand'''.''<ref>[[Sonichu Home Club]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A peculiar take on the idiom "call of nature".
</blockquote>

;[[Muscle bra|muscle bra]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A sports bra used for covering a man's bare chest.

<blockquote>''And you know what, I highly recommend this to every dude who goes around shirtless: wear a '''muscle bra'''. Because nobody, and I mean nobody wants to see your dog-gone ugly pecs, they're so ugly and repulsive, ugh... creeps everybody out.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Clyde_is_Weaker_than_Water</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Contributing to his previous fear of the homos, Chris also had a fear of seeing the bare chests of other men out of fear that it'll make him gay. He therefore suggested that men cover their chests under penalty of the law. Chris most likely adapted this name due to some weird association he makes between muscles and sports.</blockquote>

;my two bolts and a heart

<blockquote>1. ''(idiom)'' Chris's opinion or takeaway on something.

<blockquote>''Okay. I get serious creep and dark vibrations from all of this. I mean, you may do as you will if it feels right with you. Just '''my two bolts and a heart'''.''<ref>[[April_2021_social_media_posts#Dark_vibrations]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's version of the idiomatic expression "my two cents", referencing his emoji signature "⚡️💙⚡️". Chris has also used a similar phrase before while roleplaying as Sonichu, shortening it to just "my two bolts."<ref>[[Sonichu reads and critiques a Fanfic by The Crimson Libertarian]]</ref></blockquote>

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== N ==
|-
|

;[[naïve]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' dumb, lacking intelligence.

<blockquote>''You are such a cowardly, '''naïve''', retarded, individual.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Calls_Out_Three_Na%C3%AFve_YouTubers</ref ></blockquote>

Origin: Chris only seems to understand the most simplified definition of the word. In general terms, the word "naïve" is defined as "showing a lack of experience, wisdom, or judgment."<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/naive</ref> However, in Chris's mind, the word is used to "question one's intelligence". Despite his distaste for the use of the word on him, this turns out to be a commonly used insult by Chris.</blockquote>

[[File:FRENCH-NAVY-CameraObscura.jpg|thumb|Chris travels to France]]
;navy
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' semen.

<blockquote>''You know that, uh—first off, uh, the one... with the '''navy''' being drunk. Yeah. Som—yeah. A b—a—i—a—it's a good idea somet—uhhh... it's a... it's a good idea. But, uh, you know, you don't have to do it if you don't like it, but, uh... I recycle my own semen''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Play on words, i.e, a navy is a collection of seamen/semen.

''See also: [[CWC-isms#C|Comeuppance]]''
</blockquote>

;nearly same
<blockquote>1. ''(Adjective)'' Similar.

<blockquote>''And so I killed about- killed about twenty miles round trip for gas to go find her house. But it turns out that was a troll posing as that girl. [sighs] THE VOICES SOUNDED '''NEARLY SAME'''.''<ref>[[For Chris]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;negligent

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[negligee]]

<blockquote>So, I went onto Adam & Eve's website, and ordered three garments, and a transparent robe. One of the '''negligent''' is about exactly on what I had drawn onto myself.<ref>[[WCT DMs#Sexy negligee]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An obvious mispelling of "negligee", a form of lingerie.

</blockquote>

;neurotypically hindered
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Lacking the proper mindset or intelligence to understand Chris' world building, just by being normal.

<blockquote>''Go ahead; that Is what happened that day, and they did not mind it much. To mock us makes you all Soo '''Neurotypically Hindered'''.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1203938198424035329</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes that the term "neurotypical" refers to having average brain function, rather than lacking any sort of [[Autism|autistic]] traits.<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1207129697752141824</ref> He believes that if one only possesses average intelligence, it makes it impossible for them to fully accept his fantasy world, thus claiming it as a "hindrance".

</blockquote>

;neutral
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' platonic.

<blockquote>''I apologize, but I meant the term '''neutrally''', and I never meant anything from that.''<ref>[[LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And One More thing, Darling!... Talluah Bankhead would be Insulted with your response to the term's '''neutral''' usage. Hmpf!'<ref>[[LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes words like "darling" and "dear", are gender neutral terms. Because of this, he assumes that if he claims that he used it in a "neutral" way, people will know he's not using the term in a romantic tone.

</blockquote>
<blockquote>2. ''(adjective)'' politically centrist or nonpartisan.

<blockquote>''He is a communist! And we do not like communists within this country! We are Republican, Democrat or ''' neutral'''... And I am '''neutral''', so I can go either way, but I do not exactly care much for communism!'<ref>[[Re-Calling Ahuvia]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Niggo|niggo]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An African-American person.

<blockquote>''Chris: [sighs, raises his voice] BILLY MAYS IS THE NEW MAYER OF CWCVILLE!</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Max: Yeah, and also say that "Christian Chandler will be thrown in jail!" CWCville Jail.''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Chris: And Christian Chandler will be thrown in CWCville Jail.''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Max: "Where he will be raped by a bunch of niggers!" Say this one really loud.''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Chris: Where he will be raped by a bunch of '''niggos'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Julie_Reveals_Herself</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A bastardization of the racial slur "nigger". This minced oath was used only once after [[BlueSpike]] persuaded Chris to say: "''BILLY MAYS is the new mayor of CWCville, and Christian Chandler will be thrown in CWCville jail, where he will be raped by a bunch of niggers''". Chris decided to repeat this phrase, but he also thought he could "outsmart" BlueSpike by replacing "niggers" with "niggos" in order to avoid saying the offending word directly. Ironically, a whole year after the incident, Chris referred to [[Surfshack Tito]] as a "nigger" [[Chris Drops the N-Bomb|several]] [[Surfshack Tito E-mails|times]], despite not even knowing what he looks like.</blockquote>

;No fucking shit / N.F.S.
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' obviously

<blockquote>''[[The WCT]]: Don't let [[Jacob Sockness|Jacob]] get close to you ever.''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Chris: '''No fucking shit'''.''<ref name=wctdms>[[WCT DMs]]</ref></blockquote>
<blockquote>''The WCT: The Sockness Saga will be something to watch when Geno gets there. ''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Chris: '''N.F.S.'''.''<ref name=wctdms></ref></blockquote>

Origin: Another instance of Chris attempting to add unnecessary emphasis onto his writing.</blockquote>

;[[Nombie-zazis|nombie-zazis]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' zombie nazis

<blockquote>''Anyway, as for the medical study, and this will require your aid, Magi-Chan. In June of 2015, the scientists have found the gene-like molecule which makes a person turn...ugh..'''nombie-zazis'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Son10revp3.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Replacement for homosexuals and homosexuality in the revised [[Sonichu 10]].</blockquote>

;not-troll
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a victim of trolling.

<blockquote>''Consider who does more harassing, which do you block? <ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-278#post-2549629]]</ref>
<blockquote>
*Every Foul-Mouth Troll
*The '''Not-Troll''' they follow</blockquote>''</blockquote>

Origin: In Chris's mind, only two types of people exist on [[the Internet]], those who are trolls, and those who are victims of trolling. Because the person being trolled is supposedly '''not''' a troll, they are a "not-troll". Chris eventually deleted the aforementioned post, and reposted it, replacing "not-troll" with "victim" to clarify what he was referring to in the first place.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-279</ref></blockquote>

;[[Noviophobia|noviophobia]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the fear that someone you want to date is already dating someone else.

<blockquote>''His one fault, that has restricted him from finding the Ms. Right, he had a major case of '''Noviophobia''', where he is afraid to even approach most ladies, because he thought that they were all already paired up with “A Jerk.”''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_News_Dash</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Because Chris was so frustrated with so many [[CWC-isms#J|jerks]] stealing his potential mates, Chris decided that his envy and hatred of men was a real phobia. Thus, overconfident in his ability to speak [[Spanish]], formed the word "noviophobia" by using the Spanish word ''novio'', meaning "boyfriend", and the English suffix, -phobia, meaning fear . </blockquote>
</blockquote>

|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== O ==
|-
|
;[[OC]]
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation, noun)'' Original Creator. A god or deity, including [[Chris and religion#Delusions of godhood|Chris himself]].

<blockquote>''I recall that there was a Mythos about me online: myself, Chris Chan, I; I was an '''OC''' in my own stories; was I Real in this “Reality” that is Dimension 1218? And then I was confirmed in late 2007 with that blurry photograph of me in a moment of great shock and stress.''<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(abbreviation, noun)'' Original Creation. A resident of a [[Reality Cartoon|cartoon dimension]]

<blockquote>''I am pleased to announce from this collab piece alone, we have ten Sonichu/Rosechu '''OCs''' confirmed for the OC Expansion Packs of our #TSSSF set of cards, and then some, as I’m also delegating with my other friends as well. This is going to be a massive and lovely OC party!''<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Short for ''original character'', a common term used by fanfiction authors for characters invented by themselves and used in their stories yet not present in the source material. Chris believes that fictional characters [[Chris and reality|really]] exist in other [[dimensions]], and under the [[Idea Guys]]' influence was convinced they are deserving of worship. Beginning with the Console Patron Units from ''[[Hyperdimension Neptunia]]'', he has since generalised this idea on his own.</blockquote>

;OH! MY AXELS! (or OW! MY AXELS!)
[[File:Axels2.jpg|thumb|right]]
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expression of pain in one's axles (the central shafts of rotating wheels or gears in a machine).

<blockquote>'''''OOOHHHHHH!!!! MY AXELS!!!!!'''''<ref>[[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Written for [[Ghostbusters|Ghost Buggy]]'s cameo in [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]], based upon the character's tendency to complain about its aching mechanical components.</blockquote>

;OH, MY CHRIS CHAN!
[[File:CWC GoPony reaction.jpg|thumb|150px|right]]
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Exclamation uttered by Chris during his phases of holding a [[messiah complex]] and [[role-play]]ing as [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]].

<blockquote>''Why the Hell would you read that personal shit about [[Chris|Mama]] with [[LoveYouLongTime E-mails, 2013-2014#Chris fucks himself|the penis thing]]? '''[[CPU Blue Heart|Oh, My Chris Chan]]!'''''<ref>[[Chris-Chan: A Comprehensive History]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Typed as a comment for the [[Chris-Chan: A Comprehensive History]] episode involving an embarrassing email.</blockquote>

;old-fashioned<blockquote>
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Holding a belief that may be considered politically incorrect.

<blockquote>''But still, call me '''old-fashioned''' but, I'd rather be- I would not- I'd uh- I'd definitely wouldn't uh... NOT BLACK. Not black.''<ref>[[Mumble_4]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''My father is '''OLD FASHIONED'''; he NEVER gives thought to homos, and he HATES them too.''<ref>[[IRC (03 January 2009)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to regard most traditional beliefs and rituals to be offensive to the general public.

2. ''(adjective)'' Dating back to the 1980s.

<blockquote>''Ah, you can tell this is an '''old-fashioned''' Lego set on account of this—the old-fashioned "LegoLand" on the corner.''<ref>[[Song of Christian]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to believe anything that's been made more than 5 years ago is as old as dirt.

3. ''(adjective)'' Preferring real women over waifus.
<blockquote>''Nothing against waifus and the people who have them, but I Never Really understood the appeal and concept of making out a character from a show who is Dimensions Away from your own league to be any sort of a significant other to you. I’m more '''old-fashioned''' towards real women.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/954587249622077440</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. However, Chris seemed to use this word like this because he's aware it isn't considered customary to be sexually attached to fictional characters over real people.

</blockquote>

;ounce of vagina

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Essentially Chris's way of saying "I'll at least lose my virginity at some point".

<blockquote>''And, as for you, Jason Kendrick Howell… as sure as I am to get at least one '''ounce of vagina''', I have your number, and you're going down!''<ref>[[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Obviously confused when it comes to both euphemisms and basic units of measure, Chris has stated that he is sure to get "at least one ounce of vagina" within his lifetime.<ref>[[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)]]</ref> In the years since, he's gotten at least [[Mia Hamm|two]] [[Barbara Chandler|ounces]].
</blockquote>
;outercourse
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the act of stimulating someone else's genitals.

<blockquote>''I understand. You may or may not have had much exposure to sexual images as I've had, so the idea of a "hand job" (which was the act drawn there) as part of '''outtercourse''''' [sic]'' (versus intercourse) was a surprise to you.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Megan_emails,_2008#Chris_thinks_she_was_scarred_because_she_doesn.27t_know_much_about_sex</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The word "outercourse" is actually another way to refer to dry humping.<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/outercourse</ref> In Chris's mind however, outercourse simply refers to sex which involves touching another's genitals, because the action happen outside of the body.</blockquote>

;overinexperienced
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Being overly inexperienced.

<blockquote>''My Body is sexually overinexperienced, and Starved.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/May_2020_social_media_posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: It apparently didn't occur to Chris that sexual inexperience isn't the least bit comparative, at least not in the context where he intended to use this word.
</blockquote>

;overpowered (or OP)
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' A disproportionate amount of strength, which is worn as a badge of honor.

<blockquote>''If I was a neuro-typical mind, as opposed to '''overpowered''' psychic, I’d have gotten dizzy. ''<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A term normally meant to refer to imbalance in game mechanics. Chris adopted the term at some point during or after the [[Idea Guys]] saga as a way to brag about his nonexistent psychic abilities and ludicrously powerful fictional characters.</blockquote>

{{clear}}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== P ==
|-
|

;parkay
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' an epic style of running

<blockquote>''Hello there, fans! It's Christian Chandler here, live at the downtown mall, where for the Sonichu franchise and city of CWCville, and everything like that, I'm gonna do a '''parkay''' from this point all the way down to the gara--parking garage where, at the end, we will get a nice view of the tent-style theater that's down there where events are held.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_Edge</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In the video [[Sonichu's Edge]], Chris calls his style of running "parkay". Chris confused his running as a form of parkour, an acrobatic sport typically used in the military as a means of practicing the navigation of a complex environment without the use of equipment. <ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parkour</ref>. Given Chris's [[speech impediment]], the word "parkour" somehow came out as "parkay".
</blockquote>

;[[Parody|parody]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any work that "borrows" characters, plots, or styles from other pieces of fiction, whether infringing International [[Chris and copyright|Copyright]] Law or otherwise.

<blockquote>''Any names, or persons, illustrated in any of the Sonichu Comics, except that of Christian Weston Chandler, that may seem similar to anyone in real life, are purely coincidental, or otherwise '''parodic'''.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=File:Issue_8_Cover.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's understanding of what constitutes as a parody most likely comes from his interest in shows like [[Family Guy]] and [[Excel Saga]], the former of which use copyrighted characters to make jokes around them, and the latter of which parodied various clichés found in anime. In his mind, because those shows can get away with using such characters and scenes, that gives him an excuse to do the same thing in his comics as long as he states it's being done as a "parody". Ironically, Whenever Chris spoted an actual parody, he thought that the characters from the original work were being defaced.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Parody#Chris_does_not_understand_the_concept_of_parody</ref></blockquote>

;peanut
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Someone who disregards you, or otherwise does not accept you for who you are.

<blockquote>''So you enjoy it, just do it—don't worry about other people's opi—pinions. Because, uh, compared to the other schools, those people who disregard you are just total '''peanuts'''. And I'm not talkin' Charlie Brown; I'm talkin' 'bout the little nuts after the shells. The real peanut gallery. That would be peanuts, wouldn't it?''<ref>[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Apparently derived from "[[Wikipedia:peanut gallery|peanut gallery]]," a term used to describe the hecklers in an vaudeville audience who would throw peanuts at a performer. Chris's own spin on this concept is to dismiss such hecklers as being insignificant like literal peanuts.
</blockquote>

;[[Pedofork|pedofork]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A pedophile.

<blockquote>''I am not a '''pedofork''', you DORKS!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC%27s_Second_Message</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Created as a half-assed attempt to make "pedophile" rhyme with dork. Coined in Chris's [[Madman Rising]] video, in response to the trolls who were comparing him to [[wikipedia:Herbert_(Family_Guy)| Herbert the Pervert]] from ''Family Guy''.</blockquote>

;[[Pickle|pickle]]
[[File:Pickle Rick.jpg|right|thumb|Chris bought this back in 2018. The brine-soaked irony!]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A penis, particularly one of [[JERKS|any man that isn't Chris]].

<blockquote>''Do me a favor, draw a VAGINA on my Rosechu, Rosechu IS A GIRL; SHE NEVER HAD A FREAKIN' '''PICKLE'''!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Chrisreply3.PNG</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The word "pickle" is one of the few hundred slang words for the word "penis".<ref>https://web.stanford.edu/~eckert/PDF/PenisTesticlesSlang.pdf</ref> It is unknown why Chris prefers to refer to the penises of other men as "pickles", while he calls his own his "duck", but it may have to do with Chris's sexual insecurity and the fact that he legitimately hates actual pickles <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_4#Why_Chris_hates_pickles</ref>, whereas Chris thinks he's special enough to have a cutesy name for his own penis.</blockquote>

;Pfalm
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The act of placing your palm over someone's face or the camera, as if it's the viewer's face.

<blockquote>''Why don’t you tell that to [[Emgo]] before you judge yourself once again for that which you are (mis)judging me of. #BeGeekBeProud #PFALM.''<ref>[[January_2024_social_media_posts#Emgo_and_PFALM]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: According to Chris, it comes from the phrase "palm in your face", combining the words "palm" and "face".<ref>[[CWC_Blog_(Cwclight)#Random_Thoughts_(will_be_updated_from_time_to_time)]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;[[Pmurt]]

<blockquote>1. ''(proper noun)'' The 45th and 47th president of the United States: Donald Trump.

<blockquote>''EID '''PMURT''' EID!!!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Eid,_Pmurt,_Eid</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Donald Trump's last name, but spelled backwards. In Chris's first usage of this CWC-ism, Chris mentioned how "Trump spelled backward is "Pmurt", which sounds like "hurt".<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/September_2016_Facebook_posts#Registered_to_vote</ref>
Due to Chris's strong hatred for Trump, he frequently referred to Trump as Pmurt- believing that the spoken word of a backwards name has the power to degrade and weaken a person.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/U8C43P2A37A8_y_U8C1N023V0L</ref>. In Chris's eyes, if he repeated the word again and again, everyone would turn against Trump and start voting for [[Wikipedia:Hillary Clinton|Hillary]]. Unsurprisingly, Chris had no sway over the election aside from his own vote.
</blockquote>

;point at your snout and oink
<blockquote>1. ''(verb phrase)'' Do something humiliating to yourself.

<blockquote>''You both want me to even Beg, you can go '''point at your own damn snouts and Oink''' like Eric Cartman, and then [[Rape]] yourselves with your own Damn [[Star Wars|Darth Maul]] [[Sex toys|Dual LightSabre]].''<ref>[[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A reference to a scene in the ''[[South Park]]'' episode "{{w|Scott Tenorman Must Die}}", where Scott makes Eric Cartman embarass himself by singing a song about being a "little piggy". Chris said this to [[Clyde Cash]] and [[Surfshack Tito]] upon failing to receive a cash bounty for destroying his own [[PlayStation 3]].
</blockquote>

;poke
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Marijuana.

<blockquote>''Anyway, eclectic! High on the hedge and high on the hog. You want some of this '''poke''', mon?<ref>[[CWC address to Royal Board]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Intended as a demonstration of what "Soni-Chew the Eclectic Heeedge Hog Poke Mon of London, England" would sound like. A coded reference to Pokémon, and may or may not be a play on the verb "toke".
</blockquote>

;[[Polyamorous marriage|polyamorous]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Polygamous.

<blockquote>''I go'' [sic] ''married to Magi-Chan Sonichu and Cryzel Rosechu last March, and then I married Sylvana Rosechu and Mewtwo last June. We all share a '''polyamorous''' relationship.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Miss_Cherry_asks_Chris_about_his_marriages.png</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An etymologically malformed neologism from the 1970's for having multiple romantic or sexual relations at once, misapplied by Chris. </blockquote>

;prawns
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Subordinates or helpers, often those wittingly or unwittingly aiding a sinister character.

<blockquote>''You keep sending out your '''prawns''' to do your dirty work, you coward.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Chris%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica#15_May</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris almost certainly meant to type "pawns" here. </blockquote>

;[[Prickly-Wicklies|prickly-wicklies]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Punishments given for insulting or harming Chris.

<blockquote>''War gets you '''prickly-wicklies'''... as well as punches.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/A_Warm_Fuzzy_Tale</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Refer to ''Fuzzy-Wuzzies''.

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#F|fuzzy-wuzzies]]

</blockquote>

;[[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens]]
[[Image:PVCCitizens.jpg|thumb]]
<blockquote>1. ''(backronym)'' The headquarters of several Sonichu villains.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: The name itself is a backronym of the college Chris attended, [[PVCC|the Piedmont Virginia Community College]]. After experiencing several mishaps throughout his college experience<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College#Kicked_out_of_English</ref><ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College#Kicked_out_of_college</ref>, the dean giving him the cold hard truth about why his [[Love Quest]] is doomed to fail became the straw that broke the camel's back, and Chris thought it would be a smart idea to deface the college afterward in his comics.</blockquote>

;prowldent
<blockquote>1. ''(???)'' Unknown.

<blockquote>There's no quote to cite this from, just a logo in which Chris gives the name "Prowldent Virginia Community College" to [[PVCC]].<ref>[[:File:ProwldentVCC.jpg]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Likely combining connotations of "prowl" and "dent" (either to leave an indentation or [[fangs|teeth]]).
</blockquote>

;Pu Tuhs!
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Shut Up!

<blockquote>''SHE; my Ariel Starter was Female from the start, so '''Pu Tuhs!'''''<ref>[[December 2016 Facebook posts#Favorite Pokemon]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: "Shut up" backwards. Because it is backwards, Chris thinks it is more debasing than the normal version of the phrase.
</blockquote>

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Q ==
|-
|

;q-sand
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' Short for quarter sandwich (i.e. a quarter of a sandwich).

<blockquote>
''So, mom ignored her and ate the '''q-sand''' in front of her.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 31]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Appeared in an [[Jackie E-mails 31|e-mail]] sent to [[Jackie]] dated August 5, 2011. Most likely unnecessarily used as a [[Sonic the Hedgehog|way past cool]] abbreviation.
</blockquote>

;quarters
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An office space; headquarters.

<blockquote>''Then that B-Dog ripped up my notes and all, dragged me to her '''quarters''' and talked down to me very RUDELY AND HOARSELY.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris%27s_Wikipedia_profile</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Whenever Chris says that he's being brought to someone's office, he always refers to it as their "quarters", as if he was being brought to some kind of evil hideout. This could be to add unnecessary dramatic effect to his stories.

2. ''(noun, pl.)'' coins, no matter their origin or worth.

<blockquote>''Uhh. I want a soda, but it takes only C '''quarters''' and I only have W quarters. Do you have any change?''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_9_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The first time this word was used like this was in [[Sonichu 9]], where it is revealed that [[CWCville]] issues its currency in the form of "C-quarters" and "W-quarters". According to this issue, 10 C-quarters, make up a single W-quarter, which ultimately defeats the whole concept of the "quarter" coin. Despite being a part of the United States, CWC-ville still issues this strange form of currency, along with US dollars. Because of this, Chris likely decided to refer to his currency as "quarters" so that it could technically count as US currency.</blockquote>

;quite
<blockquote>1. ''(exclamation)'' A fancy replacement of the word "right" or "correct".

<blockquote>''Arthur: Magi-Chan, it's because of his-- you know, he wants to help all of his friends, and with his ability to contact them all simultaenously at the same time, it's an amazing ability to have.</blockquote>

<blockquote>''Chris: '''Quite''', he is the psychic type, after all.''<ref>[[CatKnight Interview]'']</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adverb)'' to the utmost or most absolute extent or degree; absolutely; completely.

<blockquote> ''Hm. Not enough to, uhh... Well, he knows quite-- he can see '''quite''' a bit far into the future, but although there are details of which you might not be able to see, a point or two.'' <ref>[[CatKnight Interview]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''For a hundred dollars? Th-that's, that's '''quite''', that's uh, it'd take more funds for me to, more funds than that for me to be able to acquire the material figures...''<ref>[[CatKnight Interview]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris infamously used this word, along with "indeed" ad nauseam in his interview with [[Arthur Spatchcock]], believing that doing so is essentially the same as speaking his language, British if you will.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== R ==
|-
|

;raincoat
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a condom.

<blockquote>''You ARE the woman...we gotta stop by [[Wal-Mart|Wall-Mall-Wart]] on the way for a "'''raincoat'''".''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_7_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The term "raincoat" is actually an archaic slang term for the word "condom".<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/raincoat</ref> Given that Chris has been raised by two geezers his whole life, and that part of his childhood has consisted of [[Gilligan's Island|old TV shows]], Chris thought that people would understand what he meant when he states that his Mary Sues are having protected sex with a raincoat.</blockquote>

;[[random-access humor]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' non-sequitur.

<blockquote>''Punchy grew up in a dojo, where he perfected his punches. He is also full of '''random-access humor'''. He lost his tail in a brutal fight.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP5.htm</ref></blockquote>

Origin: According to Chris, his brain is completely random, and it always spews out incoherent garbage. In his mind, this works in the same way a computer processes random-access memory.<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref>

</blockquote>

;rapier
[[File:ReldnahcTheRapier .jpg|thumb|Reldnahc the Rapier]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun, attributive)'' rapist, sexual assailant.

<blockquote>
''Now! My '''rapier''' friend, I would very much like you to get off me, please.''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/sonichu-12-pages-54-60.33547/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris-Chan Sonichu calls [[Reldnahc_Notsew_Naitsirhc#Fictional_biography|Reldnahc Ha-Taque]] his "rapier friend" in [[Sonichu 12|Sonichu #12]] after Reldnahc tackles him to the ground in a suggestive pose and touches his chest, thus (in Chris's hyperbolic mind) "raping" him. As a double double entendre, he could also be using the externally attested definition, as an adjective meaning "witty",<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/rapier#Adjective</ref> and metaphorically referring to a kind of thin, sharp-pointed sword. This is incredibly unlikely due to Chris's basic understanding of the English language, and he most likely didn't know "rapist" is the term for one who rapes, not raper or rapier.
</blockquote>

;reality cartoon

<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' The universe.

<blockquote>
''Life is a cartoon; we are all the characters of the larger; the cartoons we make are part of our own universe; we're all a '''reality cartoon'''.''<ref>August 2017 tweets#"Life is a cartoon"</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Since Chris's life revolves mainly around [[Vidya]] and cartoons, it would make sense to him that the most believable explanation for the universe and everything in it is that it's all a cartoon. Likely related to Chris's known belief that [[Chris_and_reality#Fictional_characters_and_media|all fiction actually exists in alternate universes]]. Chris' interactions with the [[Idea Guys]] made this idea seem even more plausible to him.
</blockquote>

;[[recycling]]

<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' the act of one ingesting their own semen to preserve their sperm count.

<blockquote> I '''recycle''' my own semen, because, uh, you know, yes I do masturbate.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Captain%27s_Log,_Stardate_April_28th,_2009</ref> </blockquote>

Origin: Chris, having very little knowledge of how the male reproductive system works, thinks that men can run out of sperm from masturbating or orgasming too much. Fearing the loss of "potential children", Chris actually thinks that by ingesting the sperm back into his body, his sperm count will stay in balance, thus, he is "recycling" it.

</blockquote>

;reeb
[[Image:4centgarbagereeb.jpg|thumb|Glug! Glug! Glug!]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' beer or any other alcoholic beverage of the like.

<blockquote>''Then he glugs his '''reeb''', heh-heh, and then he conks out.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_8_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, thinking he's so [[Slow-in-the-minds|clever]], decided to censor any mention of the word "beer" in his comics, by spelling the word backward.</blockquote>

;Resident-Evil refrigerator

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The refrigerator in the previous Chandler Household.

<blockquote>''Kitchen very much blocked off all over... with the '''Resident Evil refrigerator''' right there.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Tour_of_Chris%27s_House_II</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris refers to the fridge as the "Resident Evil" kind, because in Japan, the game ''Resident Evil'' is known as ''Biohazard''.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Tour_of_Chris%27s_House_II</ref><ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Resident_Evil</ref> Considering the quality of the household, that name may very well fit the description of the fridge in the state it was in before filming the [[Tour of Chris's House II|Second House Tour]].</blockquote>

;romps in the hay

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' sexual intercourse

<blockquote>''This page, by the way, was drawn before last March, so stuff Has Happened since then, it is all good. Go ahead and Muck It Up in your heads, Trolls; I Am BiSexual, and I Laugh at your Jokes. (Awesome Romps in the hay with him, as well as Cryzel)''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/July_2018_social_media_posts#BronyCon_thoughts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris has used this term since at least 2018.
</blockquote>

;[[Rosechu (species)|Rosechu]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The female counterpart of the [[Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon]].</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: Derived from the appropriately named first Rosechu of CWCville, [[Rosechu]]. The name of the species is a portmanteau of the last name of the ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog]]'' character, Amy Rose, and "Raichu", the evolved form of a Pikachu.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== S ==
|-
|

;[[saga]]
<blockquote>1 ''(noun)'' An ongoing event within Chris' life.

<blockquote>''A Sonichu Special: CWC's Love Quest '''Saga'''''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris was actually the first to use the term "saga" as Christorians know it today, using it as such when describing his Love Quest on the cover of [[Sonichu 4]]. It wasn't until the Miyamota Saga when the term was used by Christorians to describe ongoing events in Chris' life as we know it.</blockquote>

;salty
<blockquote>1 ''(adjective)'' showing more maturity or coarseness than is expected, especially knowledge of [[honest]] topics like [[Chris and sex|sex]].

<blockquote>''Ah, but I am not the weak person they think I am; I am much, much '''saltier'''!''<ref>[[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu'' #4]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Based upon a line from "Bowling Girls", ninth episode of ''[[Excel Saga]]'': "But I'm not the sweet little girl I was a few minutes ago! I'm much, much saltier now!" "Salty" in this context derives from naval lingo, since the most experienced sailors would have greater exposure to both the saltwater seas and worldly experiences.
</blockquote>

;[[Scale of Respect|scale of respect]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's way of measuring his respect for other people.

<blockquote>''I'll consider knocking you and Susan up my '''Scale of Respect''' each by 2 points''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Scale_of_Respect</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, like most other autistics, tends to view the world based on numerical values due to their lack of understanding of certain abstract concepts such as respect. Because of this, Chris made his very own numerical scale to decide on who should be respected, compared to who shouldn't.</blockquote>

;seinor
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Misspelling of senior.

<blockquote>''A cool Junior or '''Seinor'''-Year student, and follow their example on asking others out''<ref>[[CWC Blog]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An example of how the “i before e rule” escapes Chris.

</blockquote>

;self-epic
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' describing a situation which is epic, and at the same time related to Chris and his various clones.

<blockquote>''And I will square-off in the TRULY '''SELF-EPIC''' Battle between me, and my Dark Half.''<ref>[[An Important Update]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: [[Chris and his Ego|Self-explanatory]].</blockquote>
</blockquote>

;self-masturbation
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[Mass debating|masturbation]].

<blockquote>'''''Self-masturbation''' is really arduous and annoying.''<ref name=15min>[[Masturbation discussions]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris decided to add the prefix "self-" to make it clear that he was stroking his own [[duck]], apparently unaware that use of said prefix is redundant (the term masturbation typically implies self-pleasure unless one specifies otherwise).</blockquote>
</blockquote>

;self-sexually active
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' in the habit of [[Mass debating|masturbating]].

<blockquote>''And Another Thing, yes, I will admit I was '''self-sexually active'''; WAS. You all turned me off of Sex LONG Before I even thought of coming out as Trans in ‘14.''<ref>[[February 2020 social media posts#On seeing his father's penis]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A modification of "sexually active".</blockquote>
</blockquote>

;ship
[[File:Chillaxingcard.jpg|200px|thumb|An example of a "shipping".]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An act of two or more OCs interacting with or performing any given action towards one another, regardless of any romantic feelings.

<blockquote>''You must take a Pony card from the grid and reattach it elsewhere with this '''Ship'''. That card's power activates. At the end of the turn, until the Pony card attached with this '''Ship''' is discarded of removed from the grid, it gains the Keyword Villain.''<ref>[https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:EpicOnlineBully.jpeg]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An abbreviation of the word "relationship". Chris learned the term from the card game ''[[Twilight Sparkle's Secret Shipfic Folder]]'', a My Little Pony fan game satirizing the popular internet trend of shipping. He used the game as another creative medium to sell items to fans, trolls, weens, and enablers.</blockquote>
</blockquote>

;shitful
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' hurtful; defamitory.

<blockquote>''And this is the last time I will ever say anything in response to your '''shitful''' and hurtful comments and hatred for Hate's Sake!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2014_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Shitful is a vulgar slang word, synonymous with words like "boat-load" or "truck-load". Chris may have seen the "shit" part of this word and assumed that it was a more profane version of "hateful". Disregarding its actual meaning, the word to Chris is used for situations that seem "shitty" to him.</blockquote>

;[[SLGBTQ]]

<blockquote>1. ''(acronym)'' an extended acronym for LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender) which includes "straights" and "questioning people".

<blockquote>''Considering your logo there, Texas will be feeling more love from the '''SLGBTQ''' community; give us props and Love, Lone Star State.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/September_2017_tweets#Hurricane_Harvey_and_SLGBT</ref></blockquote>

Origin: When Chris first used this acronym, he didn't explain what groups the "S" or "Q" were supposed to represent, making plenty of people confused. Eventually, Chris revealed that the "S" represents '''s'''traight and cis-gender people, while "Q" represents "'''q'''ueers" or "'''q'''uestioning people". Chris believes that if he included straight people into LGBT, then those particular people would feel more invited to join into the community. Considering the fact that gay people are minorities, adding the "S" to LGBT only defeats the entire purpose of identifying people as LGBT in the first place.</blockquote>

;[[Slow-in-the-minds|slow-in-the-mind]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a mentally handicapped person

<blockquote>''And finally, after a hard "odd" day, he rides home on a bus, but unfortunately, it had a few "'''slow-in-the-minds'''" on it.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/A_Week_With_Christian_Chandler></ref></blockquote>

Origin: While the exact origin of the term is unknown, slow-in-the-minds was first used by Chris in a high school assignment.<ref>[[Manchester High Leaks#Help This Unborn Child]]</ref> "Slow-in-the-minds" works as a stand in for the less-socially-acceptable "retard", so it's possible that Chris created this CWC-ism in order to self-censor.

</blockquote>

;slow-minded

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' mentally retarded

<blockquote>''As for what had happened during PVCC, in a nutshell; about Mid-Summer, 2003, I've realize upon revolation that I needed a girl friend to make into a Sweetheart from the Ground-Up, so with a sign (which I've later realized that it made me look '''slow-minded'''; the "R" Word), I've started my Enduring Love Quest.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_emails_2007#February</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''OK, I can definitely name you a few reasons, like there was this one [stutters] …there was this one '''slow-minded''' individual named Tony. He was like as big as-he was as big and strong as an ox. He just kept on making all the moanings and noises and whatnot, and he sometimes even-even-a couple of times he even spat on me, and he even bopped me on the back of the head once or twice during the whole-during the whole time I knew him there.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Kacey_Call_9</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' stupid, but not quite retarded

<blockquote> ''I'll admit I have had some '''slow-minded''' moments. But I am certainly not totally retarded.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call#Crossing_the_Na.C3.AFve_Line_.281:46:21-1:52:36.29</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;SNERGEN FLERGEN!!!
[[Image:SNERGEN FLERGEN!.PNG|thumb|200px]]
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' A phrase one may shout out when asked for attendance.

<blockquote>'''''SNERGEN FLERGEN!!!'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic9P6.jpg</ref>
''-What?''

''Uh...here!''
</blockquote>

Origin: An obvious example of Chris's [[CWC-isms#R|random-access humor]]. This weird phrase appeared in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], when the cast was asked for their attendance during a [[CWC-isms#D|Dating Education]] class. When [[Wild Sonichu]] was asked for his attendance, he blurted out this phrase as Chris's many attempts to be funny in his comics. Given Chris's childish sense of humor, it would make a whole lot of sense for him to include a character randomly blurt out a nonsensical phrase out of nowhere.</blockquote>

;snooze cruise
<blockquote>1. a long period of slumber

<blockquote> ''Next, he had Trigonometry...I'd hate to be Christian when his nerves kicked into action after waking up from a "notey" '''snooze cruise''', but I was.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/A_Week_With_Christian_Chandler</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from ''[[Wikipedia:Sonic Adventure|Sonic Adventure]]''.

</blockquote>

;somecummpentydifferent
<blockquote>1. ''(Phrase)'' Used to announce a change in subject.

<blockquote>''Anyway and now for somecummpentydifferent stay tuned for '''somecummpentydifferent''' — a bunch of good pushups!''<ref>[[Getting Foam Ed]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(Phrase)'' Used to announce use of [[random-access humor]].

<blockquote>''And now for '''somecummpentydifferent'''. BUUUUNG! And now it's Monty Python's flying elephants. Du tu du tu du tu du. Du tu du tu du tu du. Johan, why is people running away? I don't know, Greeg, why is people running away.''<ref>[[CWCFlyingElephants]]. Note this is the very first thing he says, so there's nothing to be completely different ''from''.</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris is trying to say "And now for something completely different" like John Cleese does on [[Monty Python]]. Suffice to say Cleese's ability to say three multisyllabic words in rapid succession exceeds that of Chris.</blockquote>

;[[Tobacky|somkey]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' The quality of having smoked recreationally, be it tobacco, marijuana, or some other substance.

<blockquote>''Thank our mayor, Mr. Christian Weston Chandler that CWCville is a clean city; nobody has to go home drunk or '''somkey'''!''<ref>[[Sonichu 8]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A simple corruption of the word 'Smokey', used by [[Jamsta Sonichu]] and [[Lolisa Rosechu]] during their report on [[Sonichu 8#Spring Break, 2008!|Spring Break, 2008!]].
</blockquote>

;[[Sonichu (species)|Sonichu]]
<blockquote>1. (noun) The male counterpart of the Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: Derived from the appropriately named first Sonichu of CWCville, Sonichu. The name of the species is a portmanteau of the name of the titular character of ''Sonic the Hedgehog'', Sonic, and "Pikachu".</blockquote>

;soo
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' Very, Very much.

<blockquote>''Dear Blanca, I am '''soo''' happy that you were revealed as my True, Honest Sweetheart-To-Be''<ref>[[Chris's Letter to Blanca]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In writing, Chris often adds extra o's to the word "so" to prolong the "o" sound and show added emphasis. This has the (unintentional?) effect of mimicking the speech patterns of a Valley Girl or an effeminate homosexual. However, where most people would add two or more o's, (e.g., "I love you sooo much!"), Chris frequently only adds one, resulting in "soo," which makes the word look like it's supposed to be pronounced "sue".

This may originate from pamphlets published by [http://www.channing-bete.com/ Channing Bete], [[Autism|short and uninformative]] self-help pamphlets often handed out at churches, the last page of which often feature a summary headlined by "Soo…" Given his distrust of help from anyone other than [[Rocky]], it is not entirely impossible that Chris has read Channing Bete pamphlets occasionally.

This is one of many recurring jokes in the [[Sonichu Audiobooks]] in which the narrator pronounces words like "soo" as they are literally spelled, instead of how Chris intended them to be read.
</blockquote>

;soul-bonding
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Sexual intercourse as a means of purifying someone.

<blockquote>What had happened was Literally a Divine Mission, commissioned to Christine and I by Emanuel (GOD above Gods), herself, to Heal and Cleanse Barbara's health and soul and being and Clear her of remaining sins and regrets through Coddling, Talking, and Supportive '''Soul Bonding''' to mainly Extend her Life, personally by Divine Intervention.<ref>[[Jail Letter - 4 October 2021]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris has somehow come under the delusion that having sex with his mother would "purify" her, and extend her lifetime, all through the act of bonding each other's souls.

</blockquote>

;soup beds
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Homeless shelter with beds

<blockquote>'' I mean, we have soup kitchens and we have '''soup beds'''. We should really combine the two into SOUP HOTELS!''<ref>[[A Public Announcement for Congress]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris tries to distill his "soup hotel" idea into its two components, but he mangles one of them by retaining the "soup" prefix.
</blockquote>

;sourdough region
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The crotch area

<blockquote>''Its weak point is still the '''sourdough region''', but it would take FIVE KICKS to get to it''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_4_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In his Sonichu comics, Chris has decided to make the main weakness of the jerkops their crotch. The weakest of the jerkops take only one kick to be taken down, while higher-ranking jerkops, such as [[Jerkhief]] take five. The reason why Chris refers to this spot as the "sourdough region" is unknown, but most of his other CWC-isms already tend to sound so nonsensical to begin with, it barely even matters.</blockquote>

;spike on one's shoulder
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' refers to the act of holding grievances towards someone.

<blockquote>''There was a whole bunch of misunderstandings between me and my employer, and he had a '''spike on his shoulder''' against me.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A confusion with the phrase "chip on one's shoulder".</blockquote>

;spot
<blockquote> 1. ''(noun)'' A small amount.

<blockquote>''the recent 43.98 purchase was actually a ''spot'' of Wheeling and Dealing I did; I actually spent less to make a profit.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jackie_E-mails_15</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris likes to retardedly incorporate British English into his sentences when he has the chance, possibly to sound more classy than he actually is. The phrase "A spot of X" is a British English idiom referring to a small amount of something.</blockquote>

;sticky dream
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A wet dream

<blockquote>''After falling back asleep Chris had a "'''sticky dream'''."''<ref>[[Ivy Q&A]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris claims that a "wet dream" actually refers to wetting one's bed as opposed to nocturnal emission.
</blockquote>

;straight path
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The quality of being heterosexual and cisgender

<blockquote>''And, besides, if you stray away from the '''straight path''', it can really jeopardize the entire future of the world and the human race.<ref>[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]]''</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Before the [[Tomgirl Saga]], Chris had an intense fear of "falling off the straight path". When he states this, he is essentially referring to being on the path to straightness, in the same way a normal person would refer to someone being on the path to success. Chris also had this unrealistic idea that being in contact with gay men would suddenly make him gay too, which would therefore make him fall off the path. Possibly also an allusion to the phrase "straight and narrow" and/or the Biblical passage Matthew 7:14: "Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it."</blockquote>

</blockquote>
;[[Sub-Episodes|sub-episode]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The side stories in the [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]] comics.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: A result of Chris' use of [[Chris and English#Television jargon|television jargon]] in his comics.</blockquote>

;sumbah
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Minced oath for "son of a bitch."

<blockquote>''Yo, Christian, thanks for saving my sister from that crazy '''sumbah'''''<ref>[[Sonichu Special 4]], page K-4</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Probably based upon "sumbitch."
</blockquote>

;[[Sweetbolt|sweetbolt]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A pet name used by [[CWC-isms#E|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]].

<blockquote>''Ahh..that salad was great! What's wrong '''sweetbolt'''?''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP11.htm</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' A sweetheart.

<blockquote>''I understand, and I will NEVER put it against you. Yes, as your '''SweetBolt'''. :)?''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP11.htm</ref></blockquote>

Origin: When Chris first worked on his Sonichu comics, he tried to incorporate as many references to electricity as he can, in order to match with the Pikachu part of the titular character. A portmanteau of the CWC-ism "sweetheart" and "bolt".
</blockquote>

;[[Sweetheart|sweetheart]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A potential lover.

<blockquote>''Oh, gee, I'm sorry Bionic, but back then I was na- I was naive on dating and all that, so I just didn't think of it at the time. But if you a '''sweetheart''', Meg has created quite a few foxy characters. If she's cool with it, you could go out with one of them.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_6_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Another cutesy pet name given to candidates of his Love Quest.</blockquote>

;[[Sweetheart from the Ground-Up|sweetheart from the ground-up]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An ideal sweetheart beyond the friend zone.

<blockquote>''For days to weeks to months to years, I Felt So Lonesome and Incomplete. But I didn't STOP! In the name of Love, and the fact that there had to be a Boyfriend-Free Girl out there, somewhere, for me to get to know, grow a strong companionship with and make into a '''Sweetheart from the Ground-Up''', so in later years, after the inevitability of my parents leaving me, I WON'T BE ALONE. And I can eventually realize my dream of being a good husband, and father of a pretty girl named Crystal.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days</ref></blockquote>

Origin: As stated, Chris intended to use this weird phrase to indicate that he wants an ideal gal-pal well beyond the friend zone. Chris thought this phrase sounded so clever, that he used it constantly.</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== T ==
|-
|

;teenages

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The 13-19 age group; teenage years.

<blockquote>''Ahem... hello, ladies and gentlemen, girls and boys, and dudes of all '''teenages''', as well as the, uh, gals.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In Chris's [[Future Message]], he attempts to talk down to just about every age group. In order to do this, he starts his video off with the quote above. Chris clearly couldn't think of a way to refer to teenagers, so he decided to refer to such people by "teenages". A butchering of "people of all ages".</blockquote>

;teir
[[File:Teir.png|thumb|200|Chris spelling tier wrong.]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Misspelling of tier.

<blockquote>''$1 '''Teir'''''<ref>[[Patreon]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Yet another example of how Chris is unaware of “i before e”. In a June 2019 update, he managed to spell tier wrong throughout multiple descriptions, despite the correctly-spelled word being visible right on the page.</blockquote>

;telekinesis

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Telepathy, i.e. communication through long distances, usually via psychic or supernatural means.

<blockquote>''I’ve been communicating with her through '''telekinesis''', and she sounded very lonesome.''<ref>[[Silvana]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Whereas tele'''kine'''sis means ''moving'' objects from a distance with psychic powers (c.f. ''[[wikipedia:kinetic energy|kinetic]]''), Chris has never used the term properly. [[Magi-Chan|Psychic]] [[Silvana|characters]] in the [[comic]] have both powers of telekinesis and telepathy, but Chris has only used the former to refer to both.
</blockquote>

;Temple

<blockquote>1. [[14 Branchland Court|Chris's house]].
<blockquote>''Food for Barbara is also appreciated, and Visitors who personally offer genuine Kindness and Good Intentions are all encouraged to visit the '''Temple'''.''<ref>[[Jail Letter - 4 October 2021]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In [[2019]] Chris designated his house as the "Temple of CWC Sonichu" due to his growing [[Messiah complex]].
</blockquote>

;That was a straw that sold the blade to the executioner

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' That was the final straw.

<blockquote>''And on top of that, literally doxing someone on [[Kiwi Farms|Kiwi]], because someone has a hold over [[Bismuth|Naught]] to the point of him having to feel very insecure about himself. And the topper, in my eyes, one of y'all sent threats to [[Praetor|Anni]]. Fortunately, she completely missed and overlooked that memo in her inbox. '''That was a straw that sold the blade to the executioner'''.''<ref>[[MKR DMs]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used the phrase in listing his grievances against some members of the [[Watchmen]].
</blockquote>

;theoretical ex

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' One of the trolls who posed as a potential love interest for Chris during the classic period of trolling, between 2008 and 2011; a catfish, generally-speaking.

<blockquote>''Yeah, it’s like, you know, even when I try to make a new relationship, uh, especially among the '''theoretical rex-, exes''' I had, I still could not tell which was which…''<ref>[[Catie Date Conversation Transcript#Chris's history with the trolls]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris started calling the trolls who pretended to be his girlfriends during the classic era "theoretical exes" around the time of his date with [[Catherine|Catie]]. When pressed by Cousin Al as to what he meant, he cited that people may not always be who they say they are on the Internet.
</blockquote>

;This Viral Event

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The worldwide Coronavirus ([[COVID-19]], SARS-CoV-2) outbreak in early [[2020]], which began in [[China]] on New Year's Eve [[2019]] and has since become the most severe pandemic since the Spanish flu of 1918. Regarded by Chris as a trivial excuse to cancel a perfectly good ''[[My Little Pony]]'' convention.

<blockquote>''The Bottom Line is that '''This Viral Event''' is actually a better step in our own developments and evolution, as well as a deity-level test to sort out the weak from the moderate and strong of mental and soulful intervals, and nothing else.<ref>[[March 2020 social media posts#Chris finally weighs in on the coronavirus pandemic]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's [[Chris and religion|theodicy]] assigns any misfortune in the world to the Dimensional Merge. As the disease's spread has caused many governments to forbid large gatherings as a sanitary measure, it has become a [[Chris and His Ego|personal inconvenience to Chris]]. He believes that the pandemic will soon be stopped by [[OC|fictional characters]]' efforts,<ref>[March 2020 social media posts#COVID-19 a sign of dimensional merge]</ref> making it nothing but a transient event.</blockquote>

;[[Tobacky|tobacky]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' tobacco or tobacco products

<blockquote>''If I could, I would take every last ounce of '''tobacky''', put 'em on a rocket, and shoot 'em up to the Moon.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: American English slang, used by Chandlers since 1856,<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/tobacky#English</ref> and for [[random access humor]] since 1928.<ref>[http://www.uwosh.edu/home_pages/faculty_staff/earns/song.html Back in Nagasaki Where the Fellers Chew Tobaccy]</ref> Chris hates the act of smoking cigarettes so much that even uttering the word "tobacco" makes him feel uncomfortable, so Chris uses this as a retarded [[wikipedia:minced oath|minced oath]].<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica</ref></blockquote>

;tom-tom
[[File:Duck Pounding Some Tom-Tom.jpeg|thumb|A duck pounding some tom-tom real hard]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' female genitalia.

<blockquote>''MY DUCK HUNGERS FOR '''TOM-TOM''' TO POUND!!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/I_Am_The_TRUE,_Original_CCWC</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from the short Adult Swim music video, ''Pound my Tom-Tom'', which served as the intro to the cartoon, ''Lucy, the Daughter of the Devil''.<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r1DVoH0Njow</ref> Considering Chris barely understands anything adult, the fact that this was meant to be a bad euphemism, which the character, Lucy, used to avoid directly mentioning her vagina, flew over his head.</blockquote>

;[[Tomgirl Pictures|tomgirl]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A femboy, which is a person who identifies as male though still cross dresses.

<blockquote>''I am '''Tomgirl'''.''<ref>[[:File:I_am_tomgirl.jpg|PSN comment as of 6 April 2011]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: analogous to "tomboy", i.e. a girl who likes boy-stuff.

</blockquote>

;too many crooks

<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expression of dissatisfaction with an overabundance of evildoers.

<blockquote>''Well, call it--this was "too many crooks." '''Too many crooks!''' Too many crooks! And that ED page is one of those crooks.''<ref>[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Based upon the idiom, "too many cooks spoil the broth," although that idiom means something, whereas this is just an incomplete sentence.
</blockquote>

;took my idea for a fall

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Refers to ruining Chris's [[Love Quest]] plans.

<blockquote>''I am very mad and upset, because that JERK took my idea for a fall, just like that XXXXX at PVCC did!''<ref>[[CWC%27s Diary#2004]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this in his poem [[Saddest Heart in the World]] as well as a 2004 diary entry. Appears to be a mangling of "took me for a fool."</blockquote>

;triage

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' ménage à trois; a romantic relationship between three people.

<blockquote>''Magi-Chan Sonichu, Silvana Rosechu & Mewtwo / A Loving '''Triage'''''<ref>[[January 2018 Facebook posts‎‎#Mewtwo and Magi-Chan married]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A corruption or misspelling of "triad", possibly influenced by the ending of "ménage". "[[wikipedia:Triage|Triage]]" is a real word with a completely different meaning and unrelated etymology.
</blockquote>

;trollin' stupid

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Very stupid, in a manner pertaining to trolling.

<blockquote>''Because that's what you deserve, you God damn womanizing raping... '''trollin' stupid''' pickle suited... nigger!''<ref>[[Chris Drops the N-Bomb]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to have coined this phrase for his [[CWC "Boyfriend"|"Boyfriend"]] lyrics with "trollin'" serving as an intensifier along the lines of "fucking."
</blockquote>

;true and honest

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' something [[Honest content|honest]].

<blockquote>''I like sharing my honest feelings with other people because they're good feelings, most of the time. And more importantly they are '''true and honest''' feelings. SO THERE.''<ref>[[For Chris]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris first used the adjective with reference to his love for [[PandaHalo]], and the adjective was often used by [[Liquid Chris]].
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== U ==
|-
|

;ugly growth

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used by Chris to refer to his own penis negatively.

<blockquote>''"Did I not just tell you I am Seven Inches Long?! It is soo long, that I am literally able to stretch it Under my taint, and tuck it between my own ass cheeks, beyond my ass hole. With help, I can literally even shove the head of the '''Ugly Growth''' Up Mine!"''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Colin_Chat_2</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Un-clit|un-clit]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A piercing Chris got on his perrinium as an immitation clitoris.

<blockquote>''It is a short, steel straight piece with steel spheres, of which I refer to them as my '''un-clit'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Un-clit</ref></blockquote>

Origin: During his Tomgirl years, Chris was, and still is, very desperate to gain female body traits such as bigger breasts, wider hips, a fully functioning vagina, etc. In order to get a part of the work done, Chris got a piercing on his taint as a sort of pseudo-clitoris, showing more of Chris's limited knowledge of female anatomy. </blockquote>

;uncouth
[[File:Uncouth Twat.png|thumb|Most uncouth!]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' unlikeable, lacking good manners.

<blockquote>''And, by the way, among which, You give the Males a Most Terrible and Horrible Name in your behavior. Most '''Uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Colin_Chat_1</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''Trump is most Immature, '''Uncouth''', and Not Valid to be president.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Misc_E-mails#Anti-Pmurt</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I felt it appropriate to change my profile photo back to the filtered one for what happened in France the while back with due respect of the continuing of Trump's most drastic and '''uncouth''' actions in office.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/January_2017_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''You, sir, are '''Uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/2017_tweets#Trump.2C_you_mocked_the_mentally-challenged</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''All of you are nothing but immature, borish, '''uncouth''', and damned Neanderthals.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonic_Boom_Protests#Chris_Rages_On</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''Not Sexual Fantasy; Friendships, You '''Uncouth''' Cad. Hmpf!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2017_tweets#Unleashing_his_inner_Brit</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And as it Had been My fault on that #NationalGirlfriendTweet that started the whole mess, that was Why I chose whole-heartedly to Harass Me instead of Doopie or Anyone Else who was being harassed with the mis-content from Years Ago from me taken Out Of Context, Mind you, because Harassing Anyone at Anyone else’s Expense is Just Plain Wrong, Bullying, and '''Uncouth'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2017_tweets</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote> ''And it was ignored by you that Talulah Bankhead coined the term for Tabitha, you '''Uncouth''' Twat.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2017_tweets#Tabitha_addresses_CWC_flame_war</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I agree it is shameful of these people to have accounts just to haze at me and all others, Soo '''uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/NightStar2891_tweets#Twitter_spam_for_Tabitha</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I miss Jessica. You Trolls Scared Her Off by either Hacking or Reporting her Facebook. You '''Uncouth''' Cads!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jessica_Quinn</ref></blockquote>

Origin: As demonstrated, Chris uses this word way more than any 21st-century [[American]] would. It is often speculated that Chris picked up this word from an ''MLP'' episode, where Applebloom and Applejack are talking about what the word "uncouth" means.<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S-SrQ-Oz1k4</ref> Seeing how this conversation alone is somehow a staple in the Brony subculture, and how Chris is one of those Bronies who sees more [[Night_Star#Chris_spills_the_beans|meaning]] in the show than it actually possesses, Chris likely picked up this term due to how foreign and smart it sounded to him.

Chris is also notorious for his use of British English whenever he tries to make it seem he knows what he's talking about. So it is also fairly likely Chris may have adapted this word solely because he thinks British English words will make him sound smarter.
</blockquote>

;[[UNGA-WUNGA]]
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' A sexual chant from the [[Cherokian Clan]].
<blockquote>''There is no quote to directly cite the use of this CWC-ism. This CWC-ism was used in one of Chris' art pieces appropriately named "UNGA-WUNGA"''</blockquote>
Origin: Comes from a horrifying art piece Chris drew of himself banging [[Jackie]] against a tree while a group of Cherokians masturbate to their orgy.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Unga_Wunga_Time.jpg</ref> As for the questionably racist phrase itself, Chris simply stated that it was "just a random phrase I randomly picked for the natives to chant as they jerked off."<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jackie_E-mails_11</ref></blockquote>

;unto
<blockquote>1. ''(preposition)'' Archaic or poetic form of the word "to".

<blockquote>''Now that it has been made fully clear to me, I am now able to devote myself fully '''unto''' you, Julie.''<ref>[[BlueSpike Skype Logs 7]]</ref></blockquote>
<blockquote>''I am very devastated, due to my SHATTERED HEART that [[Mary Lee Walsh|XXXXX]] caused '''unto''' me!''</blockquote>

Origin: Another one of Chris's autistic ways of sounding smart, possibly in imitation of the Bible. (c.f. ''[[Chris and hypocrisy|Do unto others...]]''). Chris uses this form more frequently than most English speakers of the 21st century should, even when it sounds unwieldy.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== V ==
|-
|
;vaginatables

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' female genitalia

<blockquote>''There is no quote to cite the use of this CWC-ism. Chris used this CWC-ism in an e-mail address "ILuvVaginatables@aol.com".''</blockquote>

Origin: A strange hybrid of the words "vagina" and "vegetables", purely for Random-Access Humor.</blockquote>

;vege-marmite

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Vegemite

<blockquote>''Certainly not a '''vege-marmite''' sanwich. Lol''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-372</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A retarded pun made by Chris to state his distaste for veggie marmite. Coincidentally, vegemite is essentially marmite, yeast extract from brewing beer turned into a pungent, salty paste, with vegetables and spices added in.<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vegemite</ref></blockquote>

;vestite

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A transvestite person.

<blockquote>''"That is the difference between Trans Gender and '''Vestites'''; ID as the other sex, and dressing like it, respectively"''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-335#post-2635076]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In the above post, Chris intended to write the words "transgender" and "transvestite" in the same sentence without duplicating the trans suffix. He did so by adding a space between the prefix and the respective endings. It is worth mentioning that "Vestite" is a word in Latin, and simply refers to being clothed, without any connotations regarding cross-dressing.</blockquote>

;[[Virgin with Rage|virgin with rage]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An individual who is sexually frustrated

<blockquote>''Tell me why
I'm stuck as a '''virgin with rage'''!
Tell me why
I so need a cute girl my age!
Tell me why
I never wanna hear you say,
"I have a boyfriend!"''<ref>[[So Need a Cute Girl]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The idea of being a virgin and not having a sweetheart was something that greatly upsetted Chris. He would throw tantrums after losing a potential sweetheart, and thus missing out on an opportunity to lose his virginity.</blockquote>

;[[Virginia is for virgins]]

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase that pushes the idea that the citizens of Virginia won't allow Chris to get a girlfriend solely due to his autism.

<blockquote>"'''VIRGINIA IS FOR VIRGINS''', NOT LOVERS!"<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days
</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An intentional butchering of the phrase "Virginia is for Lovers". His belief that the state of Virginia is behind some kind of conspiracy to prevent him from finding true love has started since attending [[PVCC]]. While there, Chris has gotten himself putting up Attraction Signs, loitering with said signs on campus, and even creating a [[Sonichu's News Dash|newsletter series]] in order to attract potential sweethearts. Seeing how all of this violated the school's rules and policies, he was sent directly to the [[Mary Lee Walsh|Dean]] in order for her to straighten him out.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Virginia_is_for_Virgins#Origins</ref> Of course, Chris took this to be another instance of him being discriminated, solely for being autistic. This, coupled with the fact that he's already failed on several occasions to actually get to date any of his his female friends in high school, reinforced this belief. </blockquote>

;VOTES FOR WOMEN!
[[Image:Ss03.jpg|thumb|Mrs. Banks, wearing the "Votes for Women" sash that Chris so blatantly misinterpreted.]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase shouted in protest of pictures depicting women with penises.

<blockquote>'''''VOTES FOR WOMEN''', STEP IN TIME! VOTES FOR WOMEN, STEP IN TIME! NEVER NEED A REASON, NEVER NEED A RHYME, VOTES FOR WOMEN, STEP IN TIME!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic8P52.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from a sash Mrs. Banks, a character from [[Mary Poppins]], had worn. Chris clearly took this banner to simply refer to any kind of mistreatment towards women, rather than the fairly obvious implication that she's actually fighting for the right to vote.</blockquote>

<blockquote>''See Also'': [[CWC-isms#W|Women's Rights]]
</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== W ==
|-
|

;Walter Grisby
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A man's name often employed in acts of random-access humor.

<blockquote>''"Is this '''Walter Grisby'''? Who threw a frisbee? Well you know what? DAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!"''<ref>[[Random-access humor]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' The retconned name of the character formerly known as [[Wes Iseli]].

Origin: Unknown; thought by some to be a reference to the Cartoon Network show ''Ed, Edd n Eddy''. A character in the PC game ''The Sims 3'' goes by the name of Walter Grisby, but the game's release post-dates Chris's first uses of the term by some years.
</blockquote>

; Warroir of Love
[[Image:WarriorOfLove.jpg|thumb|300px|History's greatest warroirs.]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' an advocate for spreading love and peace.

<blockquote>''"People! You do not understand! By Not blocking the Trolls, you are Promoting Hatred; They don't always side with Love. I Am '''Warroir of Love'''."''<ref>[[https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/902236285389111297]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Misspelling of the word "warrior". Chris considers himself a "warrior of love" because he believes that he is the [[Chris and kindness|voice of kindness]]. Most likely derived from the derogatory term "Social Justice Warrior", a term used for individuals who advocate for social justice and equality.
</blockquote>

; water on the rocks
[[File:Water and Dasani.jpeg|thumb|200px|Literally a drink on the rocks.]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' water poured over Chris's [[magic stones]] for drinking.

<blockquote>''#DrinkWater; Filtered or Bottled, preferred; Quartz, Rose Quartz, or Amethyst optional to enjoy it '''on the rocks''' (held in place with aluminum wire).''<ref>[[March 2020 social media posts#watch anime to kill coronavirus]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''staying hydrated with more than 101.4 ounces of filtered '''water on the rocks''' within a #Glacce bottle''<ref>[[January 2021 social media posts#GFuel and meditation]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In accordance with his [[Magical thinking|New Age]] beliefs, Chris purchased a Glacce water bottle for $80+, which features a crystal display set inside. He later placed one of his [[magic stones]] into it, crudely held in by aluminum wire, and refers to drinking from the bottle as "water on the rocks."
</blockquote>

;well-breasted
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Having large breasts.

<blockquote>''And her image dawned upon me in my imagination, starting out as the '''well-breasted''' pink electric-hedgehog (Pok'emon) with the long Raichu-like tail, I drew her outfit onto her in red and Battery-Charged Blue.''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Rosechu|CWCipedia article on Rosechu}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Confusion between "well-endowed" and "large-breasted".

</blockquote>

;witching hours
<blockquote> 1. ''(noun)'' The time between midnight and 4 AM that Chris cannot fall asleep during.

<blockquote>'' I know that I'm gonna be more effective with the '''witching hours''' during the night once again, whether I'm asleep or not, okay.<ref>[[Animated Everfree Message]]</ref>
</blockquote>
Origin: May have been picked up from Chris's increasing interest in the [[Magical thinking|occult]]. Generally, the phrase refers to the midnight hours, with the term being inspired by the ancient belief that supernatural events, like witches, demons, and ghosts, are at their most powerful at midnight. Chris adopted the phrase in reference to his [[Biological clock|unusual sleep schedule]].

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#B|biological clock]]
</blockquote>

;Woahly
<blockquote> 1. ''(interjection)'' Expression indicating surprise.
<blockquote>'' Who is it Rosey? The Stew's almost ready and I... '''Woahly'''..!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Sonichu15-2019draft-p11.png</ref>
</blockquote>
Origin: Portmanteau of "woah" and "holy... (as in the beginning of saying holy shit)," found in [[Sonichu 15]].
</blockquote>

;woman up
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' The female equivalent of manning up.

<blockquote>''Fellow autistic people! I encourage you to man and '''woman up''' [Subtitle: "It is Socializing In Real Life or Dust!"] respectively! Go out into the real world, and make real friends with full, great quality friendships! Do it now!''</blockquote>

Origin: Used in the second part of Chris’s Autism Tutorial, where he insultingly attempts to rally up all autistic people (regardless of their functionality) to form proper friendships, all while missing the point of “manning up”.
</blockquote>

;[[Women's rights]] (or Women's Lib)
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' Any kind of behavior towards women that does not involve abusing them physically or mentally.

<blockquote>''Christian Weston Chandler, A Man For The Women, For the '''Women's Rights''', For the Women's Justice, For the Women's Peace.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Other_documents</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' The right for women to not be depicted with a [[CWC-isms#P|pickle]].

<blockquote>''FOR OUR '''RIGHTS AS WOMEN''' AMONG ALL PEOPLE, I WILL OVERPOWER THOSE SLANDEROUS JERKS!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic8P58.jpg</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(noun)'' The act of women protesting by stripping down naked.

<blockquote>''Well, once we get our centerfolds shot and uploaded, hopefully those bastards will see and admire our beautiful lights.''</blockquote>

<blockquote>''Yeah, and if nothing else, we can still have a lot of fun trying.''</blockquote>

<blockquote>''With our lord's support in our peaceful protest, we can win this fight.''</blockquote>

<blockquote>''Victory for '''Women's Lib'''''.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic8P51.jpg</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: Chris's understanding of sexism is botched up beyond belief. His zeal towards the rights of women is believed to have originated from watching the 1964 Disney film, Mary Poppins. He was particularly influenced by Mrs. Banks, who has expressed distaste for unequal treatment for women in 1910 London. As to be expected, Chris missed the point of this part of her character, and instead used this in order to justify his treatment towards the women he meets. Chris also believed that the term "sexism" only applies to forms of violence against women, and not necessarily representing in a condescending manner.

</blockquote>

;wooden nickel
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Acoustic guitar.

<blockquote>''I got the idea of the challenge from him COPYING me playing Boston's "More Than A Feeling" on Guitar Hero on his old '''Wooden Nickel'''; if he wants to copy on Guitar, he may as well be challenged in a Sing-Off.''<ref>[[Katie Bay E-mails 3]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In real life, a wooden nickel is a now defunct form of currency used during the Great Depression. His use probably refers to the phrase "don't take any wooden nickels" - that is, he is calling the acoustic guitar a semi-worthless imitation of his Guitar Hero controller.
</blockquote>

;worse
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' Severely; extremely, in an adverse manner

<blockquote>''IMHO, having Seinor Citizens for Parents throughout your whole life is no picnic; they are '''WORSE''' Overprotective.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 6]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;worst mud, muck and bodily fluids

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Mud, among [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|other disgusting things]].

<blockquote>''The DAMN Trolling-Stupids have manipulated me; smeared my once good name through the worst mud, muck, and bodily fluids.''<ref>June 2012 Facebook posts#Damn Michael Snyder</ref></blockquote>

Origin: First used by Chris in a June 2012 Facebook post ranting about that damn [[Michael Snyder]]. Refers to having his good name or reputation dragged through the mud, with "bodily fluids" added in an attempt to garner sympathy.
</blockquote>

|-
|
;wrath
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Great [[Chris and anger|anger]] or rage. Considered one of the [[Chris and religion|Seven Deadly Sins]].

<blockquote>''Apparently, my, uh, heed of warning towards Vivian has gone unheard or otherwise SHE DID NOT REALIZE THE FURY OF MY '''WRATH'''''<ref>[[Sign Destruction Video]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Strength sufficient to lift an office chair.

<blockquote>''I HAAAVE THE POWEEERRRR!!! FEEL MY '''WRATH'''!!''<ref>[[Power]]</ref></blockquote>
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

==X==
|-
|
;X2-checking
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' Double Checking
<blockquote>''Just '''X2-checking''' if you got the drawing I left you.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-11-2017-chris-spotted-at-bronycon.33187/page-35#post-2511049]]</ref></blockquote>
Origin: Comes from x2 meaning times two, which means double to Chris.</blockquote>

;XXX-tended
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Sexually explicit
<blockquote>''ESPECIALLY WITH ALL OF THE TRUTH BOMBS AND ROSEY ROSECHU's POST-INTERSEX-TO-FEMALE TRANSITION AND OPERATION NUDES IN THE '''XXX-TENDED''' CONTROVERSIAL VERSION OF MY BOOK NUMBER EIGHT IN 2008!''<ref>[[Jail_Letter - 20 October 2021#22 October]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>
;XXXXX
<blockquote>1. ''(noun, censorship)'' censorship of the word "bitch"
<blockquote>''Mary Lee Walsh made it illegal to distribute the News Dash; I AM VERY ANGRY AT THAT '''XXXXX'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC%27s_Diary</ref></blockquote>
Origin: Chris's only instance of this peculiar censorship is in his [[diary]]. In it, Chris repeatedly refers to [[Mary Lee Walsh]] as an "XXXXX", clearly as a censorship of the word "bitch". Why Chris chose to replace all of the letters in the word with the capital letter "X", instead of using asterisks remains a mystery.</blockquote>

|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Y ==

</blockquote>
|-
|
;y'all should know me by now
|-
|<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' An introduction to complete strangers.

<blockquote>'''''Y'all should know me by now''', but if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of Sonichu, the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon, back on March 17th, 2000.''<ref name=csm/></blockquote>
Origin: His second message on YouTube, addressed to the ED trolls. He would use it several more times after this, possibly making this into his tagline. The introduction is made under the assumption that Chris is [[Chris and his Ego|already well-known]]. May have been partially derived from ''[[The Adventures of The American Rabbit]]'', where a character similarly begins a speech by saying, "You all know me."
</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;yea and merrily
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used to open videos where Chris is feeling [[Messiah complex|messianic]].

<blockquote>'''''Yea and merrily''' to everyone. Welcome to this.''<ref>[[Jesus Christ Chan Sonichu Prime Resurrected and Returned]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''Hey everybody! '''Yea and merrily'''.''<ref>[[Simple Existential Q&A]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A stupid play on "yea, verily", an antiquated phrase meaning "yes, truly", often assumed to have been said by Jesus in the {{w|King James Version}} of the Bible. Although the word "verily" is often used by Jesus in the King James Version, the phrase "yea, verily" never actually appears anywhere in the King James Bible. It does, however, appear in the {{w|Book of Mormon}}.
</blockquote>

;young at heart

<blockquote>1. ''(noun, attributive)'' An individual with childlike characteristics; a childish person.

<blockquote>''Hello Nintendo! Welcome to my Animal Crossing for Nintendo GameCube. I am your host. My name is Christian Weston Chandler. I live in Ruckersville, Virginia and I is [sic] 21 years old and I play because I am '''young at heart'''. So anyway we are going to take a tour of my ci-ty...in Animal Crossing.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Animal_Crossing_Documentary</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I am '''Young at Heart'''; a concept I have kept within myself since childhood.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-27-chris-wants-everyone-to-be-a-manchild-like-him.33726/]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''We, the '''Young at heart''' stand alongside our Liked and Cared others.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-27-chris-wants-everyone-to-be-a-manchild-like-him.33726/]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris more often than not advertises his childish nature as him being "young at heart", as if this was a more positive quality of himself, even going as far as using this as a reason for girls to fall in love with him in his attraction signs <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Attraction_Sign</ref>. This is because Chris can't tell the difference between being a child at heart, and being childish. In his mind, people who are considered "childish" actually lead a happier and more exciting life, since he believes that childlike people are more willing to show off their [[kindness]] and are generally more eccentric. In reality, adults who are "young at heart" generally have a somewhat innocent outlook of life and are generally interested in things considered suitable for children, yet understand their responsibilities as adults, something which Chris has failed to do since graduating [[High School]].
</blockquote>
|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Z ==
|-
|

;zap to the extreme
[[Image:ZapToTheExtreme.png|thumb|200px]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Go out and be brave.

<blockquote>''Go! Sonichu! Go out and '''zap to the extreme'''!''<ref>[[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote> ''Now everyone stay green and go out and '''zap to the extr-r-r-r-r-eme'''. Have a lovely day.''<ref>[[A New, Fun Trick]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: This phrase is first used on the cover of [[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]], where Chris's self-insert tells Sonichu to "zap to the extreme" as if Chris and Sonichu were in a bona fide [[Pokémon]] tournament. Chris would then end up using this phrase time and again, usually completely out of context of its original meaning.
</blockquote>

;zapbud
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A fictitious flower found in the ''Sonichu'' canon; Rosechu's favorite flower.

<blockquote>''Oh, Rosechu, you are as beautiful as a rose, though a '''Zapbud''' is the flower that heals your woes.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_Ode_to_Rosechu</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Essentially the result of Chris attempting to create a mythology around his ''Sonichu'' comics, Chris created some of his own flora as well. Because of how "zapping" was a very common theme in the earlier issues of ''Sonichu'', Chris thought about naming his flora after this one theme. The term has ironically become popular with trolls and enablers, where they name made-up characters and places after it.</blockquote>

<blockquote>2. ''(noun)'' a [[CWC-isms#S|sweetheart]].

<blockquote>''Yes, my blossoming '''zapbud'''. That's why we are here.''<ref>[[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In this context, the term is used the same way a female lover may be compared to a flower. This was clearly an attempt to make the flora have a greater significance by making it sound like something beautiful.
</blockquote>

;zombie-like

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' To be riddled with dementia.

<blockquote>''Also, Barb is literally a Zombie-Like Living Body with little remaining of Barbara (her Soul) within her anymore; that living body is Running on Fumes at this point. She CAN NOT Drive anymore, regardless of Van loss; she has the fridgid mental activity and physical ability like a scared deer in headlights nearly ALL the time since even before June, 2021.<ref>[[Jail Letter - 29 July 2022]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in a [[Jail Letter - 29 July 2022|Jail Letter]] where Chris seems to imply that during his affair with his mother, she might have been declining mentally.
</blockquote>

|}

==References==

<references/>

==Navigation==

{{CWC-isms}}
{{Lists}}
[[Category:CWC-isms]]

Homos

2025-06-13T05:25:16Z

Anemichu: /* Lesbianism */

:''This article is about Chris's opinions on homosexual men and women. For Chris's identity as a lesbian transwoman, see [[Transgender]]. For Chris's bisexual identity, see [[Bisexual]]. For a general overview, see [[Chris and sexuality]].''

{{Honest}}
{{Articleofthenow}}
{{Misinfo|It should be noted that Chris used this term interchangeably with gay men, and trans women he perceived as being just gay men. He referred to the ones he saw as authentic women as "[[hermaphrodite|hermaphrodites]]". One should note the context of the conversations he was in whilst using these terms to determine what he was referring to.}}
{{Quote|I Am Straight; [[China|Vaginas]] and [[Plush breasts|Boobies]] Give Me MY [[Duck|ERECTIONS]]; You Damn Homos have NO CHANCE with me EVER.|[[Chris]].<ref>[[Mailbag 31]]</ref>}}
{{Quote|I'm bisexual trans woman! And I, I lick pussy and suck cocks!|Chris in [[2020]], flaunting his [[bisexuality]].<ref>[[Chris Chan VS. The Internet#July 2023 Leaks]]</ref>}}

[[Image:RainbowChris.jpg|thumb|Fun fact: [[Rainbow]] colors are the internationally recognized colors for the gay pride movement.]]

'''Homos''' was the pejorative term by which Chris referred to gay people – almost invariably gay males – nigh exclusively at the time of his discovery. He had also occasionally used phrases such as "those of the wrong orientation", because even saying the word "homo" or "gay" made him uncomfortable. Chris's former ire for male homosexuals was confusing, since they, of all people, posed the least threat to his [[Love Quest]], and seemed to be motivated entirely by his own sexual insecurities.

From the very beginning of his [[internet]] fame in [[2007]], his extreme opposition to homosexuality and his neurotic, obsessive demand that everyone "[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|STAY STRAIGHT]]" had been one of his most noted and exploited aspects. Many interpreted his heteronormative crusade as a possible tell that he was repressing his sexuality in some fashion... Which ended up being the case in the long run. Over the course of the 2010s, Chris gradually recanted previous homophobic statements, becoming accepting of gay people, before eventually identifying as a [[bisexual]] [[Transgender|transwoman]] and proudly supporting what he called [[SLGBTQ]] causes.

==Past Homophobia==

{{quote|"Yes, I am a homophobe; I fear them all, and I fear the tormenting temptations of falling off the straight path. But then I mentally, sometimes from a DVD (and if you'll pardon the expression), shove some pussy in my face. I tell you what, if I ever stoop down to changing my path, I might as well would get a gender change operation."|Chris [[transgender|foreshadowing]]. <ref>E-mail to Megan, "I'm sorry... *[[sigh]]*:; Date: Sat, 20 Oct 2007 3:10 pm</ref>}}

Chris's homophobia apparently grew out of the complex stew of his [[noviophobia]], his failure to achieve his Love Quest, his admiration for [[My Little Pony|girly toys]], his own [[Chris and gender|gender confusion]], his loathing of [[muscle bra|male bodies]], and his [[autism]]. His terror was such that he was barely able to bring himself to even utter the word "gay" or any other term concerning gay people, except of course for "homo." He struggled with intrusive homosexual thoughts<ref>[[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3]]</ref>; he said that he couldn't even look at a picture of a [[pickle]] without being "freaked out."<ref>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref> In [[Kill De Jack]], Chris revealed that he had to cover a section of his computer screen with a piece of paper so that he could browse the [[CWCipedia]] without looking at [[Jack Thaddeus]]'s pro-gay advertisements. Nothing got Chris angrier than being "mislabeled" as a homo.

Chris was not simply afraid of becoming a homo himself--he hated all gay men. This animosity seemed to result primarily from his fear of them (and all men) and their supposed ability or desire to make him gay. He had often characterized the [[trolls]] - all of them - as homos, which is either a basic ''ad hominem'' attack or a sincere belief that anyone who draws penises on [[Rosechu (character)|Rosechu]] must be gay. It also revealed a belief that all of his trolls are male, since Chris used "homo" exclusively in reference to gay men. This notion is not only [[Ivy|demonstrably]] [[Jackie|false]], but in fact [[Chris and reality|completely delusional]], since many of Chris's greatest trolls have been women, and Chris knows it. This exercise in selective memory likely stems from Chris's loathing of male [[JERKS]] and inversely-proportional adoration of [[Gal-pals|women]].

Notably, in [[IRC (02 January 2009)|an IRC chat]] from 2 [[January 2009]], Chris made this statement:

{{quote|if I could have it my way, I'd make it illegal and forbidden to have homo Men; women are safe. Also, I would have the secondary definition of the word "gay", being Homosexual, REMOVED from the word in the dictionaries, and all instinctions [sic] and sayings of the word will ONLY LEGALLY be used to mean HAPPY, as it was originally intended among songs like "[[Wikipedia:Deck the Halls|Deck the Halls]]"|Chris, 2 January 2009, 11:59.}}

[[Image:Bionic2.jpg|thumb|Chris projects his repressed homosexuality onto [[Bionic the Hedgehog|one of his own abominations]].]]

Chris further went on to propose a bizarre form of conversion therapy in which all gay men would be imprisoned and made to sleep with both female offenders and prostitutes against their will (read: basically rape), thereby "reprogramming" them. Interestingly, a certain [[wikipedia:Heinrich Himmler|Herr Himmler]] had a similar idea, suggesting that "pink triangle" concentration camp prisoners be forced to sleep with (female) camp prostitutes.

{{quote|[they would be] taken in and reprogrammed with multiple upon multiple pleasurable moments with female prison inmates and prosts.|Chris<ref>[[IRC (02 January 2009)]]</ref>}}

On 30 [[January 2010]], Chris voiced his sagacious opinion about the ban on homosexuals serving openly in the American military. He advocated the lifting of the ban, but only so that "[[Mailbag 49#Chris loves his country|the homos can go die in explosions]]."

The universe of [[CWCville]] also saw an anti-gay jihad. On 5 [[January 2010]], Chris stated that [[Magi-Chan]] keeps a constant psychic surveillance to ensure that there are no homos in CWCville.<ref>[[Mailbag 31#Magi-Chan knows when you fuck]]</ref> When evidence of homosexuality is found, the people involved are [[Chris and the law|arrested and fined heavily]]. In [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], Chris's comic self travels into the future, where scientists have successfully isolated the "homo gene" (An idea stolen from the ''[[Family Guy]]'' episode "[[Wikipedia:Family Gay|Family Gay]]"). They have not, however, isolated the "straight gene", and are only able to when Chris donates his own blood (Chris has once remarked that [[Wikipedia:Sonderbehandlung|homosexuality could be cured by injecting blood from straight men into homosexuals]]). Chris then brought back to the present enough of the "cure" to turn every gay person on Earth straight. Ironically, a vaccination traditionally consists of introducing a small amount of the disease to a body to stimulate the immune system - so Chris unwittingly implied that his blood contains the dreaded homo virus.

A classic case of Chris's homophobia surfaced in the struggle over advertisements on his CWCipedia. Jack Thaddeus purchased ad space on the CWCipedia to put up 2 ads. One featured Peter Griffin of ''Family Guy'', pointing out that he and his creator, Seth MacFarlane, were supportive of gay rights; and the other promoted Mexican tourism with a cartoon cactus that Chris mistook for a [[pickle]]. Chris unsurprisingly went berserk, stating:

{{quote|I understand you getting paid to run ads in that box on the Cwcipedia. I feel okay with Vivian's [[Audiobooks]], BUT I feel OFFENDED with the Mexico Contest and Gay-Rights Ads. The Pickle on the Mexico ad reminds me of a terrible time in my past with Pickle-Suited TROLLS, and '''I AM AGAINST HOMOSEXUAL LIFESTYLES and FOR STRAIGHT HETEROSEXUALITY.'''|Chris.<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20150316170011/https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=User_talk:WikiSysop]
Wiki Sysop archive</ref>}}

In protest, Chris replaced Jack Thaddeus's gay-friendly ads with ads for [[wikipedia:Love In Action|Love In Action]] (an "ex-gay" ministry), ProtectMarriage.com (a site promoting [[wikipedia:California Proposition 8 (2008)|Proposition 8]]), and a site calling for a boycott of Pepsi due to their gay-friendliness. To sum it up, in one fell swoop, Chris managed to put in three big things that would ''not'' win him any gay friends whatsoever.

As with his fear of becoming a homo, the origins of Chris's deep homophobia are not clear. Certainly [[Bob]] had an influence, as the [[Matthew Noble call]] showed that he had the same kind of deranged hatred and prejudice as his son. On 7 January 2010, when answering the question of how he began hating the gay population, we got this interesting insight:

{{quote|I estimate that I started hating them about Summer, [[2003]] just after I started my Sweetheart Search, where I received the response from one woman, "Ooh, I'm sorry, I am a Lesbian." That, combined with my PAST dislike of MEN in general AND the later pictured images of such acts led me to DISGUST AND HATRED FOR THE HOMOSEXUALS. Plus ALL of the Homos within the Trolls AND all Homosexual Fans with their WRONGFUL Quoting of MY comics and characters in THEIR PAPERS and ESSAYS promoting homosexuality, and EVEN WORSE a Sonichu BALLOON in one of their God DAMED Pride Parades!!! ALL OF THESE FACTORS have ONLY made my view of the Homosexual Males WORSE!|[[Common Questions#Answered 07 January 2010|Chris, before finally stating (for the umpteenth time) that Sonichu is straight.]]}}

If this is true, Chris made no reference to it at the time, restricting his hatred solely to the heterosexual male [[JERKS]]. It is certainly ironic considering his more recent views on lesbianism. It also adds another interesting aspect to his hatred: Chris's frustration with homos is influenced by his being childish and whiny about not getting his way with ''one'' woman who turned him down. We wouldn't expect anything different from him.

He later expressed anxiety towards gays in his classic "[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|Future Message]]," released in February 2007.

Chris knows that his homophobia was unpopular with [[True and Loyal Fanbase|his fans]], and he often tried to persuade the public that he respects homosexuals for "who they are". However, he usually betrayed his sincere intolerance of different lifestyles soon afterward - often within the same statement. On [[CWC Update 18 February 2009|18 February 2009]], for example, Chris issued one of his retractions of his previous homophobic remarks and declared that he respects "the gay people" just as he respects his gal pals and his [[List of Chris's sweethearts|sweethearts]]. However, this was done at the insistence of [[Julie]]; [[CWC with Bible - Leviticus|a mere month later]] Chris was [[Chris and religion|reciting verses from the Bible]] to once again preach against the vile homos.

On 14 [[June 2009]], Chris posted a "[[music]]" [[video]] called "[[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There]]", which, in his tradition of ruining everything you ever loved, is a homophobic version of [[Wikipedia:Uncle Ruckus|Uncle Ruckus]]'s satirical song "Don't Trust Them New Niggas Over There" from ''[[Wikipedia:The Boondocks|The Boondocks]]''. Later on that same day, he published an [[I'm Sorry, Dude|apology]] for the video and insisted that he likes gays who "ac...accomplish other things, like [[Wikipedia:Stephen Fry|Stephen Fry]], who was a homosexual, but y'know he did a good job being a narrator on ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]''." Chris was of course unaware of the various other career accomplishments of Stephen Fry. It seems that this apology was only posted in the first place for the sake of his gal-pal [[Kim]]'s boyfriend, whose gay brother apparently lost both his arms in Iraq.

[[Image:CWCRockin4Way.jpg|thumb|"If I was a homosexual or anything like that, would I not be [[Warning - Naughty Women ;)|having sex with THREE WOMEN?"]]]]

On 6 August 2009, at a time when the trolls were getting the most mileage out of baiting Chris regarding his sexual orientation, Chris posted a wide-ranging, [[Chris and anger|hate-fuelled]] rant on the [[CWCipedia]] which he hoped would clear up all misconceptions. His "Address to the Homosexuals," subtitled "I AM STRAIGHT!!! NOT HOMO; NOT BI; STRAIGHT!!! GET IT THROUGH YOUR THICK SKULLS!" is a classic statement on the issue. Unfortunately it had no noticeable effect on the trolling. The essay in full<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20160330210442/https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Homosexuality] CWC Homosexuality archive</ref>:

{{quotebox|
Good day, I write this essay with sound mind to address the major issues that has been bugging me constantly for the past few yeas, The Pressure and '''Stress''' FROM the Homosexual Population.

First off, as I have said OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND '''OVER Infinite Number Of Times''', ''I, “Christopher” Christian “Ricardo” Weston Chandler, AM STRAIGHT.'' '''[[Tomgirl Saga|No Question or Shadow of a Doubt, EVER.]]'''

I personally respect the individual people as fellow human beings, and I am cool with associating with them as acquaintances and friends, but Please Do Not Wave Around what you do behind closed doors around me; '''NOBODY CARES TO KNOW; I PERSONALLY DO NOT CARE TO KNOW.''' Even within my imagination, I Do Not Care to even have the pictures Randomly Pop up in my head. Every time of such pictures’ appearance, ''I feel Queasy and want to Throw Up.'' I humbly apologize for being offensive, but that is how I feel.

As a human being, I have no hard feelings conversing and associating with the homosexuals at any time. Individually, they each have a right to their own opinions, perceptions and peaceful lives. I fully understand and respect that.

''The only thing that really Grinds My Gears Harshly is being '''Wrongfully Labeled as a Homosexual when I am straight.'''''

I am aware of the way I [[Speech impediment|stutter]], space my words and all that from the way I talk, but I assure you, that I sometimes have trouble fully comprehending situations and status at first; it sometimes takes me a long while before I can fully comprehend and make an appropriate reaction. In another word, ''I am Sometimes Retarded.''

And the ONLY REASON I have not had sex yet in my lifetime WITH A WOMAN yet, is because '''the WHOLE TIME, I have been SHY'''; kept down with the ''Personal Fear of nearly EVERY Woman I see being Already Paired-Up with a Boyfriend''. I am not a man who likes confrontations with the guy who has spoken for the woman I’m eying over. And during my High School Years, '''I WAS NAÏVE on the subject of DATING''' (''Bring in Dating Education Classes, and Run them Alongside or Before Sexual Education, and make Dating Education Equally Mandatory)''. [[Honor roll|It had not dawned on me that I NEEDED TO BE DATING until AFTER I had turned Twenty-One-Years Old]], during my Third Year attending Piedmont Virginia Community College.

And my '''Sonichu and Rosechu Comic Pages'''; again, I understand each individual person has their own perception of things, BUT Contrary to the individual perceptions among some people, '''The Comics, Drawings, and ALL Words ALL HAD NO MEANING OF ANYTHING Homosexual Whatsoever!''' I Personally in Real Life AND in the Comic Pages and all that '''PROMOTE BEING STRAIGHT''', No Question or Shadow of a Doubt.

All Those of You have Heavily Wrongfully Misunderstood Parts of All the Comic Pages and all that of such.

'''I, All my Sonichus, Rosechus, and citizens of Cwcville, Virginia, Do Not Appreciate At All Being Wrongfully Labled as homosexuals. IT REALLY INFURIATES ME, Sonichu, Rosechu and EVERYBODY ELSE.'''

I have also heard of My Sonichu being ''written in College Essays that promote homosexuality.'' And even worse, ''promoting him in the Gay Pride Parades.'' '''WRONG LABELS; STOP WRITING OR PROMOTING ME OR MY CHARACTERS AS SUCH!''' ''[[Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc|ALL Sonichus Are Straight!]] [[Silvana Rosechu|ALL Rosechus Are Straight!]] I Am Straight! My Comics are STRAIGHT COMICS.'' I, Sonichu and Rosechu, '''We Never Want to be part of ANY AND ALL Homosexual-Promoting Papers or Events, because with EVERY ITEM that is created from NOT OF MY OWN HANDS that EVEN Inklings such Wrongful Labelings upon, ME, Sonichu, Rosechu, and ALL MY STRAIGHT CHARACTERS, WE ARE ALL BEING DISREPECTED!'''

We will Never Take the Misunderstandings, Mislabelings And All The Like Sitting Down.

I, Personally, would RATHER have a PAINFUL Gender-Change Operation than EVER Turn Homosexual.

'''So, to reiterate, I, and 96 % of ALL CHARACTERS, are ALL STRAIGHT!''' ''NEVER EVER CALL me, my comics, or any of MY STRAIGHT Characters GAY!''

<nowiki>*</nowiki>sigh*

And to conclude, while I personally do not care about the homosexual lifestyle that swift, and I personally respect each individual homosexual person as individual human beings, '''The MAIN thing that really Infuriates Me is being called gay. DO NOT EVER Call Me Gay, or EVER Question My Sexual Orientation.
'''

''I, “Christopher” Christian “Ricardo” Weston Chandler, Am Straight. Period.
''

Thank you.}}

On 12 January 2010, Chris again appeared to soften his stance, saying that "I am decreeing that homosexuals will have equal relationship rights within CWCville." However, in the same breath Chris clarified, "gay marriage is still Illegal and Wrong. And [[Magi-Chan]] will stay out of those people's heads under my request."<ref>[[CWC Blog#12 January 2010]]</ref> The reason why gay marriage isn't an "equal relationship right" is not readily apparent.

===Defenses against becoming a homo===
[[Image:CWCIsSTRAIGHT.jpg|thumb|According to Chris, heterosexuals defend their sexuality by [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|stomping on vibrators and showcasing index cards indicating their straightness on their shoes.]]]]
It's hard work for a warrior of true love and honesty to stay straight. Chris used many strange and totemic objects, from a [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|poster of Sailor Moon]] to his [[Optimus Prime]] toy, to aggressively assert his straightness. Chris has said that he stared at his Sailor Moon poster every day to stave off temptations of homosexuality. The centerfold poster of [[The Simpsons#Marge poster|Marge Simpson's ''Playboy'' edition]] was another of Chris's many defenses against becoming a homo. The fact that she is a married cartoon character does not seem to have dissuaded him. Chris also subscribed to ''Playboy'' to help keep himself straight. You could tell he's straight because when he's explaining what he finds attractive in women it only takes five seconds for him to get around to breasts and [[china]].

When homosexual (or potentially homosexual) fans sent Chris questions on the CWCipedia asking for tips to STAY STRAIGHT, Chris tended to suggest what essentially amounts to self-brainwashing. Some of his ideas included thinking of naked women and how awesome they are, and imagining being struck by painful lightning whenever a homosexual thought occurs.<ref name="ReferenceA"/> He also clarified that one needs not buy a Sailor Moon poster in particular; any poster featuring attractive women (preferably in bikinis and looking sexy) will do the trick. He believes these rituals are necessary to "maintain" sexual attraction to women.<ref name="ReferenceA">[[Mailbag 3#Hypnotize away the gay|Mailbag #3]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 3#Sexy posters|Mailbag #3]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 4#Dissolving homoerotic thoughts in stomach acid|Mailbag #4]]</ref>

Chris has also encouraged women to not [[Alcohol|drink]], [[Tobacky|smoke]], or be physically abused while pregnant, as this could cause the baby to be born homosexual, as if Homosexuality is like Fetal Alcohol Syndrome. <ref>[[Mailbag 5#Daniel Tammet/Punching your baby will make it gay|Mailbag #5]]</ref> Chris is also convinced that his chances of becoming homosexual have been raised because he did not engage in heterosexual intercourse before maturation,<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20160630043451/https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Dating_Education] old CWCki Dating Education archive</ref> hence his oft-stated regret that he did not get [[dating education]] classes in high school, and his recommendation that they be made available for the youth of today.

==Lesbianism==
Whereas Chris's discomfort with homosexual males has been fairly consistent, his views on lesbianism have wildly vacillated. In Chris's ''Carrie'' rip-off, "[[The High School Story]]", his Mary Sue character Terrah LeAnne Yowman is ridiculed and accused of being a lesbian by kids at her high school because she hangs around with male friends. As the work serves as a backstory to the villainous [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens]], Terrah's bullying may have served as a fictional inverse parallel to the endless accusations of homosexuality lodged by Chris' detractors, illustrating Chris' worldview of implied homosexuality as an insult.

{{quote|She felt angry when she heard "Lesbian"; when called that, she would leave the bully an intimidating [[Creepy stare|glare]] with a purple glow from her green eyes. Then soon after, a Strong, Straight [[Christian Weston Chandler|Homophobe]] would attack that bully with [[Chris and religion|No Mercy]]; beat the crap out of that person.|"[[The High School Story]]"}}

On 25 July 2009, Chris produced a [[CWC "Boyfriend"|rambling and nonsensical video]] to the tune of Avril Lavigne's "Girlfriend". In the middle of the video, Chris sings about the importance of "being straight" and intersperses a "STAY STRAIGHT" caption on a photo of a lesbian couple split in two.

{{quote|
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I know that you like me!
Hey, you! Hey, you!
You need to be straight, girl!
Hey! Hey! You! You!
I want to be your boyfriend! }}

Later, Chris would gradually revise his former hard-line attitude against lesbians. In ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'', Chris goes out of his way to state that the [[Sonichu and Rosechu's children|children]] of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] are watched over by [[Heather Iglesias]], whom he characterizes as "a pretty, trustworthy, good natured Spanish Lesbian."<ref name="Cwcipedia: Sonichu">[https://web.archive.org/web/20160324174526/https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Sonichu Cwcipedia: Sonichu]</ref> He further mentions that Heather keeps her sexuality a secret from the kids at the request of Sonichu himself.<ref name="Cwcipedia: Sonichu"/> Chris may have shoehorned a lesbian character into ''Sonichu'' to appear more tolerant, but his attempt comes off as half-hearted in light of his continual derision of gay men and insistence that Heather hide her sexuality.

In [[Mumble 1]], which took place on the last day of 2009, Chris declared his support for lesbians and reiterated his simultaneous hatred for gay men, stating that he hated [[JERKS]] in general, and how (typically) a porn DVD helped to soften his view on lesbians. In effect, Chris claimed that he supports lesbians because he believes women are beautiful, and hates gay men because men are icky.

{{quote|Uhh. Pretty much but it's like you know, between lesbians, it's like, hmm, partial [dis]courage. But then it's- but then again, but then between guys instead I would definitely 100% discourage. In my humble opinion...I've uh talked to others before with uh, [[PandaHalo|Sarah]], my uh s-s-Sarah, my girlfriend. I can not be willing to do a threesome with uh two women, but defina- but definitely never with two guys.|Chris, [[Mumble 1]]}}

{{quote|Yes, Yes they are- yes they're they're more beautf- they're more beautiful. They're like, they're really- they're truly like works of art in their own way- just like yeah you know, just like you know the statues that uh, were in past times.|Chris, [[Mumble 1]]}}

On 28 [[March 2013]], Chris posted a public [[Facebook#Gay Marriage |Facebook message]] whining about repeat media coverage of the Supreme Court's [[:wikipedia:Hollingsworth v. Perry|Proposition 8]] and [[:wikipedia:United States v. Windsor|DOMA]] deliberations. In it, he reiterated his support for lesbians and his disapproval of "the damn homosexual males".

By 14 [[August 2014]], Chris's [[transgender]] status had proceeded to coming out as a "lesbian-identified male." In his coming out post, he posted a picture of himself holding an LGBT flag, but stated that "I support the LBT fully; the G.[ay] M.[ale]s are fortunate to be on this boat."<ref>[[August 2014 Facebook Posts#Chris comes out...kinda]]</ref> On 31 [[October 2014]], Chris spent that [[Halloween]] at a gay bar dressed as a "Groovy 70's Lesbian",<ref>[[October 2014 Facebook Posts]]</ref> further evidencing his apparent acceptance of homosexuality, in that visiting a gay bar was THE thing Chris had specified on multiple occasions in the past that he would never do in his life.

Through [[2017]], Chris expressed his interest in media ripe with lesbian implications; hinted at to the point in which he fantasizes himself in the act. Prior to his relationship with [[Jessica Quinn]], Chris complained of his loneliness by comparing to himself to ''[[Life Is Strange]]'' lesbian deuteragonist Chloe Price.

==Shifting Stance on Gay People==
[[File:CWC's FB like on news about gay men, April 2017.png|thumb|200px|Chris likes a news item about gay men, April 2017.]]

Not long after coming out as a "male lesbian," Chris felt deeply uncomfortable with being perceived as "gay" or "homo," and in Facebook statements attempted to exclude gay men from his crusade for gender equality. No doubt under the influence of his new sweetheart [[Catherine]] and other gal-pals, Chris retracted these clumsy statements, apologizing for the umpteenth time.

{{quote|I am accepting of the gays as people, just like most any individual person. Seriously, you all be proud of who you are. All I ask is not to find any reason to feel anger towards anyone of any orientation, race or whatever, based on their individual actions or offense as an individual person of self. Also, please disregard all of my past and Way past thoughts of turning gays straight; that was very wrong of me. I am very sorry about that, and continue to be true and proud of yourselves for who you are, as I am Very Proud of myself for being a Lesbian Transgender (a Female, Lesbian Soul trapped in a male body).|Chris, surprisingly redeemable.<ref>[[September 2014 Facebook Posts]]</ref>}}

He also announced his support for the Human Rights Campaign, going so far as to say that homophobics "are none other than the Cyber-Bullies and Internet Trolls who put hate on the innocent around the world; Young and Old. Some of which even put pressure on to force you into being something you know fully that you are Not!" Interestingly, his prior notion that all trolls are homosexuals had been completely reversed to the idea that they're all homo''phobes'', illustrating that Chris still believes that any detractor of his is part of an organized movement and [[Chris and his Ego|has personal flaws]].

However, if the past is any judge, the end of his relationship with Catherine has no doubt caused his homophobia to resurface. He confirmed in late 2014 that despite the fact that comic Chris shares his new gender identity, [[Reldnahc]], his opposite, is still an evil violent homo.<ref>[[Commissions]]</ref>

On 26 [[June 2015]], the Supreme Court upheld the constitutionality of gay marriage. Chris, shockingly enough, reacted very positively towards this:

{{Quotebox|Congratulations to us all for Nationwide Marriage Equality! If a holiday be made of June 26, 2015, how about ‪#‎PridependenceDay‬!

Now, I still require my Sweetheart to be my future wife. As a ‪#‎Lesbian‬ ‪#‎Transwoman‬, I do feel I am compatible with Any woman.

And No, I am not mistaken. I have been genuinely feeling and [[List of Chris's lies|identifying like a woman for about my whole lifetime]]. I never could appreciate the [[JERK|male's]] Neanderthal interests. And I felt more appreciative and comprehending of [[Women's Rights|fashions, makeup, shopping]], [[Chris and remorse|empathy]], identifying feelings and [[Death threats|looking to resolve problems]] [[Sub-episodes|reasonably]].

Plus, I have a great deal of [[Chris and Anger|self control]], and I can bring good and pleasant [[semen|tidings]] to an all woman party.

‪#‎LoveWins‬ ‪#‎OneFamily‬ ‪#‎LGBTQ‬ ‪#‎Pridependence‬ ‪#‎Pride‬}}

In [[October 2015]], Chris released a [[Apology for past homophobic comments and homophobia.|video]] in which he apologizes for his past homophobic statements and iterates that he is now supportive of male homosexuals, while still drilling the point home that Sonichu and Rosechu are straight. He almost simultaneously [[Retroactive continuity in Sonichu|retconned]] [[Sonichu 10]] and replaced the fictional gay epidemic with a bizarre [[Nombie-zazis|Nazi zombie]] premise, which still has homophobic implications given the context of the comic.

As of [[April 2021]], Chris seems comfortable enough identifying as bisexual that he feels that he can casually use the terms "fag" and "faggot" to describe other people ([[Chris and hypocrisy|but not himself]]), thinking that the slurs are words that the LBGT+ community universally wants to {{w|Reappropriation|reclaim}}. In reality, such a position is a point of controversial debate in the community, and the way Chris used the term was predictably met with backlash for being careless, tone-deaf, and potentially hurtful.<ref>[[April 2021 social media posts#"Fag"]]</ref>

==See also==
{{CWCipedia|chris=Homosexuality}}

* [[Bisexual]]
* [[Chris and religion]]
* [[Chris and sex]]
* [[Chris and sexuality]]
* [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet]]
* [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There]]
* [[Gay 4 Sonichu]]
* [[Hermaphrodite]] - The term, but for trans women.
* [[It's UGH!]]
* [[Reldnahc Naitsirhc]]
* [[SLGBTQ]]
* [[Tomgirl]]

{{References}}
{{Sexuality}}
[[Category:Homos]]

14 Branchland Court

2025-06-08T15:15:41Z

Anemichu: Grammar

{{Split Off}}
{{Protip| [[Chris-Chan | CHRIS]] DOES NOT LIVE HERE ANYMORE. Please stop trying to trespass in order to get photos of 14 Branchland Court or [[Barbara Chandler | Barb]] anymore. [[Unholy Quintet| There truly is no point to it]].}}
{{quote|No burglar would ever want anything in this house.|Chris, being surprisingly ([[Manchester High Leaks|almost]]) modest.<ref>[[Mailbag 44#No burglar would steal Chris's stuff|Mailbag 44]]</ref>}}
{{quote|Number 14 was aflame in '14. LOL|Chris, on the two-year anniversary of his [[2014 house fire|house fire]].<ref>[[December 2016 Facebook posts#Number 14 was aflame in '14. LOL]]</ref>}}
[[File:14bc-2024.jpg|thumb|The house in 2024.]]
[[File:August2021House1.jpg|thumb|The house in 2021.]]
[[Image:ChrisHouseMap.jpg|thumb|Aerial shot of the house.]]
[[File:14BCBEV.jpg|thumb|A rough drawing of a top-down view of the house in [[2009]]. This cutaway shows the second floor, with [[Chris's room]], the [[kitchen]], living room, bathroom and an unknown area visible.]]

'''14 Branchland Court''', [[Ruckersville, VA]], often abbreviated to '''14BC''', and also currently known as '''[[Sonichu Headquarters Google Intro Video|Sonichu Headquarters]]''' and the '''Temple of CWC Sonichu'''<ref>[[:File:CWCs Temples Gazebo TSSSF.jpg]]</ref> – is the last bastion of [[autism]]. This was the vile lair of [[Christian Weston Chandler]], up until his [[Jail Saga#Arrest|arrest in 2021]]. Currently, it is inhabited by [[Christopher's name change|Christopher's ghost]], Chris's mother [[Barbara Chandler|Barbara]],<ref name="BarbBackIn14BC"/> the surviving [[Chandler Cats|Chandler cats]],<ref name="BarbBackIn14BC"/> and Chris's dog [[Clover and Snoopy|Clover]].<ref name="BarbVisit">[[Fan visits#e1ectricthunder]]</ref> It was a white two-story house with dark red trimming (which faded to ivory and pink respectively) with three bedrooms on the outskirts of Ruckersville, although since its renovation has been repainted in beige with dark green shutters. The property is near the intersection of Branchland Court and Westwood Drive, facing northwest. The house is just past the local trailer park and nestled in a lower middle-class suburban community. It was built in [[Pre-1980#1970s|1977]], and with no major work done from [[1986]]<ref>[[:File:14BranchlandCourt.png]]</ref> to [[2014]], the house shows its age with its tacky fake shutters and vinyl siding.

Chris and his family have notoriously spent decades constantly filling up the house with tons of garbage and junk, earning it the nickname of '''"The Hoard"'''. In earlier pictures (those of [[Chris]]'s twentieth birthday in [[2002]], for instance), the house seemed reasonably tidy; but, in his [[Tour of Chris's House|first video tour]], Chris kept referring to the fact that "things got cluttered," suggesting that the house has only grown fuller and fuller ever since. "Clutter" is, of course, a grievous understatement; the entire house is packed with garbage, to the point where junk fills up entire rooms and reach within two feet of the ceiling (the living room was, for a while, basically inaccessible due to all the accumulated junk). Similarly, other rooms are full of junk, but rather than solid, impassable slabs of filth like in the living room, there are small crevices with chairs, TVs, and other furnishings.

Of the three Chandlers, Barb was the biggest hoarder, and one of the biggest obstacles to cleaning the place aside from the general laziness of the family. [[THAT IS MY HOUSE]] revealed that Chris's parents were aware of the alarming implications of the house's condition (with the junk being both a health hazard and a fire hazard), and feared that Chris's video tours could've elicited the attention of the [http://www.vdh.virginia.gov/LHD/ThomasJefferson/ Health Department of Greene County] resulting in their home being condemned. In the wake of Bob making that remark, [[weening|weens]] made several calls to the health department in hopes of spurring such a process into action, but their efforts proved fruitless, like most efforts to get the state to intervene in Chris's sorry life.

Chris [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 8|claimed]] to have put forth some effort towards cleaning up the house in early 2010, but the "back-breaking" tasks he describes amount to [[Chores|simple maintenance]], like vacuuming and scrubbing the floors. He talks about this as if he is making great progress in fixing the disaster area that is 14 Branchland Court, but his efforts seemed to amount to little more than preventing himself from [[Vivitheg's AIM chat|slipping on cat shit]] on a regular basis. Barb apparently threatened to throw him out of the house if he were to attempt to dispose of some of her hoard of useless shit.<ref>[[Kacey Call 10]]</ref>

Chris also claimed that Bob used to use a [[computer]], but Barbara bought an enormous amount of crap from Goodwill, blocking off the computer. Whether or not Barb did it to stop Bob from using the computer is unknown, but at any rate he did.<ref>[[Jackie Chat 8|Jackie Chat #8]]</ref>

In [[Rocky Shoemaker call|a phone call]] to [[Rocky Shoemaker]] in 2011, it was revealed that 14 Branchland Court was infested and that the parasitic infestation caused [[Bob Chandler|Bob]] to be "covered in bug bites" before his death from heart disease.

On 10 [[January 2014]], Chris reported that the house had sustained major structural damage from an [[Destruction Of Chris's House|early-morning house fire]] following an electrical shortage. Chris, Barb, the dogs, Lucy the cat, and other possessions made it out safely, and they spent about a year in a [[rental house]] – which they predictably completely trashed – before moving back to the renovated 14 Branchland Court in [[December 2014]]. Although Chris was temporarily detained in jail after his misadventure on the [[26 December 2014|26th]], he was later released on bail and moved back into his house in [[January 2015]].

The house was vacant between the time of Chris and Barb's separation after the [[Affair with Mother|incest]] fallout, and the first few weeks of the [[Jail Saga]] following Chris's arrest. A [[Kiwi Farms]] user confirmed that Barb returned to the house starting on, or at some point before, [[August 2021|August 29th 2021]].<ref name="BarbBackIn14BC">[[Kiwi Farms posts (other users)#Status of 14 Branchland Court]]</ref> As of 2023, it appears that 14 Branchland Court is finally receiving at least some of the TLC it deserves, as recent fan visits have found the lawn being clipped and cleared of rubbish, and portions of the all-consuming hoard within having been extricated into bins to be disposed of, suggesting that someone has been paid to help Barb maintain the property.<ref>[[Fan visits#DATSJUSTWATINEED2BUS]]</ref>

Following the dismissal of Chris's case in [[August 2023]], his car was spotted at 14 Branchland Court on 4 [[September 2023]]. Chris retrieved his possessions from the house, such as some [[2021_Lost_Commissions|commissioned artwork he never finished]] from [[Help send Chris-Chan to Everfree NW|two years ago]]. In [[April 2024]], during a visit to 14 Branchland Court, Chris filmed himself collecting gravel from the front yard for selling on [[OfficialCWCmart]].<ref>[[Harvesting Process, Gravel at the Sonichu Temple]]</ref>

==History==
{{See also|Property tax assessment}}

14 Branchland Court was built in 1977 on a lot of 0.56 acres.<ref>[[Property tax assessment]]</ref>

Chris's parents presumably purchased 14 Branchland Court at some point between their marriage on 7 June 1980 (at which point they were still living in the Richmond area) and Chris's birth 20 months later. A plaque which hangs above Chris's bed in some videos (notably [[All Star]]) indicates that his parents' nickname for the house was '''"Wes-Chandler-Ton Manor"'''.

Chris lived at 14 Branchland Court from his birth on 24 [[February 1982]] until his family moved to the [[Richmond]] area in [[1993]] in order to escape the [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|Greene County]] Public School system's attempts to pull him out of mainstream schools. Initially, Chris and his father lived in the Richmond suburbs while his mother held the fort in Ruckersville so she could continue working for the local electric power authority until retirement. Barbara joined them after retiring a few years later.

The Chandlers moved back to the Ruckersville house in [[2000]] after Chris graduated [[high school]]. In [[100 2178|a video]] released in [[May 2010]], Chris claims that his family tried and failed to sell the house at some point, and would have stayed in the Richmond suburbs if they had been able to find a buyer. Chris naturally attributes the house's failure to sell to a conspiracy between local realtors and the Greene County school system, but as this article explains, it probably went unsold for more practical reasons.

The original number of the house was '''46 Branchland Court''' - this is the number given in [[A Week With Christian Chandler]] (2000) and [[Cole Smithey]]'s 1994 postcard to Barbara. It was changed to 14 sometime after 2000.

==First House Tour==
{{main|Tour of Chris's House}}
{{quote|if Clyde thought my room is a mess, he should see the rest of my house; my family has a LOT of clutter from small things in boxes to furniture. [...] You don't need to feel surprised from the mess of my family, my mother got her things one at a time while "it was a bargain".|Chris to [[Julie]]<ref>[[BlueSpike Skype Logs 5]]</ref>}}
{{clear}}

[[Image:CWCHouse.jpg|thumb|right|[[Wikipedia:Inferno (Dante)#Canto III: Vestibule of Hell|Abandon all hope, ye who enter here.]]]]

In two videos uploaded on 27 [[March 2009]], Chris provided a tour of his house and the property that it's on. Like his own room, Chris's entire house is a disaster area. Several rooms are so cluttered that Chris cannot enter them.

What follows is a brief description of the rooms and other areas of 14 Branchland Court circa 2009.

{{clear}}

===Ground Floor===
[[File:0012-BobbyReading.jpg|thumb|250px|Bob in the family room.]]

The north corner is what Chris describes as the '''[[music]] room''' (probably where Bob kept his extensive music collection), which was primarily the domain of Barbara, who frequently slept there. A small '''bathroom''' is directly in front of the stairs leading up to the front door. On the other end of a short hallway is the '''utility room''', in which the family kept a refrigerator in addition to the usual washer and dryer. The '''family room''' (possibly in the west corner) had been claimed by Bob, who apparently slept there as well. If Chris's parents ever had, or used, dedicated bedrooms in the house, then they were never filmed.

{{clear}}

===Top Floor===
[[Image:411-CWCWeekP5 crop 2.jpg|thumb|right|Barbara moving Chris's earthly possessions from [[Richmond]] back to the living room in April [[2000]]. The junk was already amassing.]]

'''[[Chris's room|Chris's bedroom]]''' is in the north corner of the second floor. Across the hallway, near the east corner, is a filthy '''bathroom''', which apparently has not been cleaned in years, as implied by the layers of dark brown/green mold growing in the shower and the peeling of the veneer on the cabinetry. The '''[[kitchen]]''' and dining area are apparently near the southern corner and southwestern wall. The computer Chris used for Internet access at the time was in this part of the house, as was a Christmas tree left up year-round. Tellingly, Chris has actually photographed himself with [[Officer Nasty]] and [[sex toys|dildos]] in the kitchen, and has even [[mass debating|mass debated]] here over a webcam feed. This implies that Chris's parents never actually went upstairs, leaving Chris free to do [[sex tape|whatever he wanted]] undisturbed (well, [[Bob Walks In|mostly undisturbed]]). The '''living room''', filled with garbage to the point of uselessness, is across the stairway from Chris's room. It is likely the same as Chris's current '''[[Chris's room#Work room|work room]]''' used for storing toys and shooting videos.

{{clear}}

===Yard===
{{main|Yard (14 Branchland Court)}}

==Second House Tour==
{{main|Tour of Chris's House II}}

[[File:14bc1.jpg|thumb|The house in 2012.]]

In 2013, a video was leaked by [[Alec Benson Leary]] showing the state of Chris's home since the last tour he gave in 2009. Needless to say, especially in light of eyewitness reports of his front yard in 2012, the house became even ''more'' of a mess in the following years. Whereas Chris had at least ''some'' room to maneuver in the 2009 Tour Video, here, the passageways have become so narrow and jam-packed that even he complains about all of the clutter being in his way and begins sounding increasingly [[Stress|annoyed]] as he attempts to navigate the claustrophobic environment. The kitchen, in particular, has become an unsightly mess--the Chandlers apparently couldn't be half-assed to put away their groceries, so it's strewn all over the place. The living room, already an ocean of rubbish, has gotten worse, with the accumulated clutter now towering over Chris to the point where he has to stretch to get footage of it. The bathroom hasn't been cleaned since the [[ShowerClean|last video Chris released of him cleaning it]] - and he even admits so himself in the video.

Even the stairs of his home have become cluttered with nonsense such as Christmas ornaments, boxes, and bags, which could spell disaster if Chris or his mother have to evacuate the premises. Also notable is the fact that every so often, Chris can be observed picking up random pieces of garbage from the floor as well.

In [[Chris and his ego|typical Chris-Chan fashion]], he describes his room as "the cleanest of the whole house", despite it having unsightly masses of clothes everywhere and even an unmade bed that he couldn't be bothered to at least straighten up before making this ill-advised video.

When he steps outside, he basically confirms what trolls have documented as early as 2012: that his lawn is ''completely'' overgrown to the point where it has utterly consumed one of the structures in his yard. Also unsurprising is the fact that after Bob's death, the garden shed has been completely abandoned.

Given his commentary, it ''almost'' seemed like Chris acknowledges that he has kept his home in a very unacceptable condition....right until he blames [[Borb|his parents]] for being "hoarders" and [[Chris_and_remorse#Shifting_blame|totally shifting blame away from himself]], ''despite'' being the "man" of the house.

By this time, the bug infestation appears to have been gotten rid of, or at least contained. It was stated before that the infestation was so bad that Chris was confined to his room in order to avoid getting bitten, but in this video, no bugs are seen and Chris makes no mention of them.

==2014 house fire==
[[Image:14 Branchland Court on Fire - Copy.jpg|thumb|right|Witness image of 14 Branchland Court on fire. On Facebook, Chris blamed Keurig for causing the fire, but later let slip in an email that it was plugged into a "heavy-duty" extension cord in the basement bathroom.]]

{{Main|2014 house fire}}

On 10 January 2014, a fire broke out at the Chandler household. According to Chris, this was caused by a worn extension cord plugged into a coffee machine, which sparked and started the blaze. Chris, his mother, the beagles, and Lucy (one of the cats) made it out safely, surprising when you consider how much clutter was obstructing the stairways. The firefighters could not effectively navigate the house through either door and were forced to enter through the windows. Sadly, one of the cats (revealed to be Scamper by Chris in February 2016) perished in the fire from smoke inhalation and was later buried in the backyard.

The Chandlers escaped with little more than the clothes on their backs. Chris wrote that he was able to take his wallet, medication for his mother, some clothes, and his iPhone. The day after the fire, he and his mother were allowed to reenter the structure, and he learned to his relief that many of his personal possessions, including his games, his computers, and his artwork, had survived. His [[Lego]] [[high school]] survived, albeit partially melted. Chris was also observed on [[Miiverse]] shortly after the fire, suggesting that he managed to save his [[Nintendo]] 3DS or Wii U at some point. However, it can be assumed that much of the hoard suffered fire, smoke, and/or water damage.

As completely tragic as this incident was, it did not come as much of a surprise, given Barbara's hoarding and Chris's unwillingness or inability to control his mother's compulsions or properly clean. As pointed out by quite a few concerned people, the house had ''always'' been a health and safety hazard, and it was only a matter of time before disaster struck. Sadly, Chris was unable or unwilling to act on this well-meaning advice, and, as a result, reaped what he and his family had sown.

Chris and his mother stayed at a [[Rental House|rental house]] in nearby [[wikipedia:Barboursville, Virginia|Barboursville]] for most of 2014 as repairs to 14 Branchland Court were made. They also rented a storage locker. To the shock of absolutely no one, Chris and Barb managed to trash that house up as well; photos taken by Chris showed rodent shit on the house's carpeting, and [[Rental House Tour|eyewitness reports]] showed that the conditions in the rental house were basically the same as they were at 14 Branchland Court. Trolls reported in [[April 2015]] that the house was still vacant four months after Chris and Barb moved out.

For reasons which are not entirely clear, the renovation of the house took much longer than anticipated. Nevertheless, the worst fears, that the house would be condemned or the renovations would not be finished, were unrealized. In December 2014 and January 2015, the Chandlers moved back in.

==Post-fire renovation==

[[File:14bc215.jpg|thumb|left|A renovated 14BC.]]

On the 6th of December, 2014, Chris announced on [[Facebook]] that his home had finally been repaired, and he would be moving back in near the start of the [[2015|new year]]. Ever a busy man, Chris managed to fit a [[26 December 2014|run-in with the law on Boxing Day, followed by two days in jail]] into his moving schedule. Once he was released on bond on 29 December, Chris was shortly back to complaining about having a "Charlie Horse [sic]" from moving his mother's hoard back to the house.

After Chris's second hearing in April started and finished half an hour early, and they failed to make it in, the Christorians who took it upon themselves to attend decided to make the most of their visit and go on a tour of the major places in Chris' life, including 14 Branchland Court. The photographs they took showed that the Chandler headquarters had been modernized, and no longer looked like ''total'' shit. This is partially due to the modernized exterior, and partially due to most of the hoard still being in storage. Photographs also showed some sort of outhouse in the backyard raised off the ground, and soon to be full of the hoard.

Other notable changes:

*The [[kitchen]] became accessible and could once again be used for cooking. Chris used it to [[Specimen Sample|store his semen]].
*Chris's [[bedroom]] moved to the first floor, his former room being used for storage.
*The downstairs living room, formerly full of Barb's hoard, became Chris's toy-filled workroom.

===Return of the hoard===
{{quote|A loving fairly well-kept home of my father. I kept it up..|Chris, lying to himself about the state of his home in [[Sonichu Headquarters Google Intro Video]]
}}

[[File:Sonic Totem and More.png|thumb|250px|A room filled with what is presumably Barb's hoard.]]

In the few years after having the house rebuilt, the Chandlers' negligence and hoarding slowly turned it back to its filthy, cluttered past, proving, like mother like son, Barb is just as incapable of learning from her mistakes as Chris. Ironically, the Garden, which in the years before the fire had become increasingly bereft of plants, was just about the only part of the property which thrived as of 2020, having become overgrown and unkempt with weeds, wildflowers, and plants encroaching from neighboring properties.

<center><gallery>
File:Eid, Pmurt, Eid!!! original.mp400001.png|Nov 2016 - The dirty hallway carpet, seen in [[Eid, Pmurt, Eid!!!]]
File:A few seconds of Barb dancing.png|April 2018 - At the bottom left is one of the newspaper spots where [[Clover and Snoopy]] [[Clover and Snoopy#Poor Living Conditions and Neglect|relieve themselves]]. Near the [[kitchen]] entrance.
File:Filthy carpet in Work Room - July 2019.jpg|July 2019 - Filthy, stained carpet against a hoard of toys, taken in Chris's [[Work Room]] through the Pokemon Go game, shared with the comment, "Party Time."
File:Mewtwo May 2020.jpg|Outside of the house, with stained exterior.
</gallery></center>

In October 2017, one of the bathrooms had a clogged shower drain, possibly stuffed up with Chris's seaweed [[hair]]. His solution was to pour Liquid Plumr into it and whine that every house should have two bathtubs.<ref>[[October 2017 tweets#Clogged shower drain]]</ref>

{{clear}}

==Third House Tour==
{{main|Tour of Chris's House III}}

Chris filmed the third tour during [[March 2018]]. While his house is shown being ''very'' slightly less messy than it normally is, even that's being ridiculously charitable. Chris's room is packed to the rafters with all sorts of clothes and Rubbermaid bins, though it is semi-accessible, and shockingly, so are the oven and kitchen sink. Overall, he is shown having less of a struggle walking through his house, but there is still plenty of junk accumulating over the tables, hallways, kitchen, and shelves.

==Mortgage==
The Chandler family has assumed two mortgages on 14 Branchland Court. The first was fully paid sometime before [[February 2009]], when Chris attested his house had no mortgage against it.<ref>[[Mumble 4]]</ref> The '''second mortgage''' on the property was filed in [[April 2009]] for $130,000,<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/yt-11-21-help-please.25958/page-11#post-1896956</ref> held at first by {{w|SunTrust Banks}} but since transferred to [https://seterus.com/ Seterus], now operating as {{w|Mr. Cooper}}<ref>https://www.consumerfinance.gov/about-us/newsroom/consumer-financial-protection-bureau-settles-with-mortgage-servicer-for-illegal-practices-that-impeded-borrowers-attempts-to-avoid-foreclosure/#:~:text=Seterus%20is%20no%20longer%20operating,Cooper.</ref>. As of 31 [[August 2016]], the Chandlers still owe '''$115,000''', which is still more than the property is actually worth.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/yt-11-21-help-please.25958/page-12#post-1900319</ref> Chris's [[monthly tugboat]] furnishes (or once furnished) the roughly $800 monthly payment.<ref>[[August 2014 Facebook Posts#Hmmph!|"I pay the monthly mortgage which kills most of my monthly."]]</ref><ref>[[April 2017 Facebook posts|Whining about the mortgage]]</ref> Contrary to a popular misconception, it is not a reverse mortgage:<ref>https://financial-dictionary.thefreedictionary.com/reverse+mortgage</ref><ref>The latest confirmation that 14 Branchland Court currently has no reverse mortgage was during [[Discord Q&A 7]] on the night of 15 September 2020.</ref> the mortgage is estimated to extend thirty years, with 5% interest.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/yt-11-21-help-please.25958/page-12#post-1901342</ref>

Among the Chandlers' various [[debt]]s, the mortgage is the primary cause of the [[Financhu Crisis]]: acute circumstances relating to it have caused Chris to resort to begging many times. As for the reason why the Chandlers took on said mortgage can be summed up to paying off Barb's credit card debt; a bad move. On one occasion, [[Chris and negotiation|he pleaded idly]] with his [[TRUE and LOYAL fanbase]] to pay the entire mortgage at once for him.<ref>[[August 2016 Facebook posts#Who wants to pay our mortgage?!]]</ref> Moreover, the Chandlers have repeatedly neglected their monthly payments. When the [[Idea Guys]] had threatened to destroy [[CWCville]] and his [[eBay]] sales were not enough to meet their $6,000 ransom, Chris withheld a mortgage payment to save his [[Chris and reality|fictional setting]].

Chris's closest flirt with financial ruin occurred on 8 [[May 2018]], when he announced that the home could be foreclosed upon if they failed to make two mortgage payments the next day;<ref>[[WE NEED MONEY FOR MORTGAGE NOW, PLEASE#Please, HELP US! FORECLOSURE RISK HIGH!|Please, HELP US! FORECLOSURE RISK HIGH!]]</ref> fans donated enough to prevent this. Onlookers speculate, given [[Chris and money|Chris's financial habits]] and [[Barb]]'s other debts, that after she passes away, that the estate could well be liquidated after her passing, or that Chris may struggle to keep up mortgage payments in the face of so many [[My Little Pony|tempting]] [[Vidya|distractions]].

Chris claimed in [[Jail Letter - 30 October 2021|a jail letter]] that the "Sonichu Temple" now had a mortgage of less than $90,000 (assuming he has mastered the distinction between the [[Chris and science#Algebra|greater than and less than symbols]]), and begged for donations to [[Barbara Chandler|Barb]] to help pay this.

==Neighbors==
{{quote|When I was pulling up to the stop sign on the cul-de-sac, the neighbor directly across the street from 14 Branchland yelled out "He's in jail!" with a big grin.|A Kiwi Farms user visiting 14 Branchland Court in the wake of Chris's [[Affair with Mother|incest]] charge.<ref name=Dec21photos>[[Kiwi Farms posts (other users)#December Photos of 14 Branchland Court]]</ref>}}
[[Image:Ruckersville house prices near 14BC.jpeg|thumb|House prices in the vicinity of 14BC reported on Zillow in 2019. Note the decent price estimates of neighboring buildings, while 14BC itself lacks a valuation altogether.]]
Although the Chandlers have mostly kept to themselves over the years, they have had some notable interactions with their neighbors:

*The [[abusive babysitter]] was a neighbor of the Chandlers in 1983, living on Westwood Drive, Ruckersville.

*[[Sarah Nicole Hammer]] was one of Chris's neighbors when they were children.

*In the aftermath of the [[2014 house fire]], a neighbor allowed Chris and Barb to stay with them temporarily.<ref>[[January 2014 Facebook Posts#FIRE.21]]</ref>

*Barb once tried to steal a neighbor's dog which had slipped out of its collar but was forced to return it when the neighbor showed up at their door.<ref>[[Clover and Snoopy#Stealing a Neighbor.27s Dog]]</ref>

*At some point in 2014, a deeply paranoid Chris told of a feud with a preteen neighbor whom he had suspected of stealing his old homework and passing it in for credit. According to Chris, the Chandlers (Barb and Chris) contacted Animal Control on the neighbor's cat and had it put to sleep, after it had scratched Chris. Chris claims the neighbor retaliated by training a snake to invade 14 Branchland Court, egging the house and stealing some items.<ref>[[Catherine E-mails#Chris the Cat-Killer]]</ref>

*In 2015, Chris uploaded [[A few kicks]], a video of him kicking a soccer ball around in his yard. At one point, the ball enters the road and Chris gives chase. He abruptly stops once the ball enters a neighbor's driveway, possibly meaning that he had been told not to go on that property without permission.

*In 2017, one of Chris's cats, [[Sorbet]], was injured while outside and ended up under a neighbor's gutter.<ref>[[May 2017 Facebook_posts]]</ref>

*On 25 [[January 2019]], Chris tweeted how a neighbor angrily yelled at Chris for making his child [[tomgirl|question their gender identity]].<ref>[[January 2019 social media posts#Week round-up]]</ref>

*On 15 [[July 2021]], one of Chris's neighbors helped him bury his dog [[Snoopy]].<ref>[[July 2021 social media posts#Eulogy for Snoopy]]</ref>

==Visiting==
{{main|Fan visits}}
[[File:Aggrevating ArtPhoto2.png|thumb|200px|A fan visiting Chris at his house.]]
When occupied by the Chandlers, visits to 14 Branchland Court, at least until Chris inherits the house and trades the deed to it for magic beans, are ill-advised. Harassing the Chandlers at their house is not only the paragon of [[ween]] behavior, ''it is also a criminal offense'' and will probably result in you getting arrested. Chris and especially Barb shouldn't have to contend with the troll horde within the sanctum of their own home. We shouldn't have to be saying it at this point, but '''do not visit 14 Branchland Court to troll Chris or Barb'''.

Unless, of course, you ''are'' personally invited. To date, Chris has extended personalized invitations to [[Clyde Cash]], the [[Magical Man]], [[Liquid Chris]], the staff of [[Asperchu#Asperpedia|Asperpedia]], [[Catherine]] and pretty much anybody that has ever thought ill of Chris to come to his house, so that he might [[Death threats|murder them]]. To date, none of them except Magical Man has taken him up on his offer. The scenario of such a meeting would likely be reminiscent of the [[hooker incident]], wherein the police would be promptly summoned.

Despite this, some fans have made the trip out to visit Chris at his home and have posed for photos with him, showing that Chris had lightened up on his stance.

In 2021, after [[Jail Saga|Chris was jailed for incest]], some weens made the pilgrimage to harass Barb for information about Chris, leaving empty-handed.
That said, it bears repeating: '''do NOT visit 14 Branchland Court to harass Barb,''' as you are likely causing undue stress on an ailing woman who had an incestuous affair with her own son.

==Chris and his address==
[[File:Sonichu temple of ruckersville in cwcville va by nightstarrosechu2891 dg6od5t-pre.jpg|thumb|Drawing of Chris' house by him ([[December 2021]])]]
Giving away one's home address on the Internet is generally considered unwise. Chris has probably never realized this, or perhaps he realizes that [[trolls]] have so thoroughly and permanently violated his privacy that attempting to preserve it is a lost cause. In any case, he has publicly announced his home address on a number of occasions, in YouTube videos and elsewhere.

* Shortly after 21 July 2009, when [[CChanSonichuCWC]] released a video promoting his ''Sonichu'' merchandise, Chris posted his address in a YouTube comment in hopes of a physical confrontation with the "impostor".
* On 14 August 2009, in the video [[NO D*** WAY, IMPOSTOR!!!|"NO D*** WAY, IMPOSTOR!!!"]], Chris rattled off his address as a way of attempting to prove his identity.
* He did the same thing in his [[CWC Public Disclaimer]], also released on 14 August 2009.
* On 23 November 2009, in the [[CWC_Personal_Sonichu_Presentation|''Sonichu'' Presentation]], Chris provided his address (as well as his home and mobile phone numbers) in hopes of attracting investment in his comic book characters.
* On 15 January 2010, Chris released a [[15 January 2010|video]] where he summoned the creators of the Asperpedia to his home address for a confrontation.
* On 27 August 2010, Chris gave out his address and phone number in a [[EXCLUSIVE Manchester High School 2000 Reunion Required NOW|YouTube video]] seeking to organize a high school reunion. In the same video, he warned viewers to be careful with their personal information on the Internet, taking his anti-grasp of irony to incredible new levels.
* Chris has published his address on his websites at various times. It was available at the bottom of the main page on the [[CWCipedia]] for most of the time Chris used the site.
* On 29 January 2016, Chris proved he hasn't learned a ''thing'' over the years when, in [[Update 1/29/2016 - There is NO PewDiePie or Felix here whatsoever|a video]] intended to dissuade [[trolls|well-meaning fans]] from sending mail to famous YouTuber [[PewDiePie]] (aka Felix Kjellberg) at his address, he felt the need to specify 14 Branchland Court as the address at which Kjellberg does not live.
* On 20 April 2019, Chris listed his address and phone number as part of the [[Sonichu Headquarters Google Intro Video|Google My Business]] program under the name "Sonichu Headquarters." He also expressed interest in making his house a Pokéstop.
When he and Barb stayed at the rental house, it didn't take long for him to [[Brushfire Video|drop ''that'' house's address]].

When Chris writes out his full home address, he has a tendency to write his nine-digit [[wikipedia:ZIP_Code#ZIP+4|ZIP+4]] number (22968-'''''9545''''') instead of just his five-digit ZIP Code. This is rarely done for home addresses as it is considered unnecessary.

==The Fate of 14 BC==
It goes without saying the house will be foreclosed once Barb passes away. What will become of it afterward remains uncertain. Because Chris no longer resides there, it is unlikely he'll be moving back in given his bad [[Financhu Crisis|financial]] [[Debt|record]], in addition to his tugboat being insufficient to cover upkeep, let alone mortgage. As for the property itself, it's possible the house will either be [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|condemned and subsequently demolished]] by the Virginia Health Department, sold to a family looking for a place to live (provided the property is up to standards), a [[True and Loyal Fanbase|fan]] looking to preserve the property, or by weens trying to outbid one another in order to convert it into a [[Messiah complex|temple]]/[[Chris and his ego|museum]] for all things Chris and Sonichu related.

==Gallery==
===September 2013===
On 7 [[September 2013]], some pictures of the house were leaked on the [[CWCki Forums]].
<center>
<gallery>
File:14BranchlandCourt1.jpg|
File:14BranchlandCourt2.jpg|
File:14BranchlandCourt3.jpg|
File:14BranchlandCourt4.jpg|
File:14BranchlandCourt5.jpg|
</gallery>
</center>

===March 2014===
On 3 [[March 2014]], pictures of the house post-fire were leaked on the forums. On the 3rd and 4th shots, note the damage to the left half of the roof, matching the location of the shot of the actual fire.
<center>
<gallery>
File:14BCPostFire1.jpg|
File:14BCPostFire2.jpg|
File:14BCPostFire3.jpg|
File:14BCPostFire4.jpg|
</gallery>
</center>

===April 2014===
On 14 [[April 2014]], more pictures were leaked on the forums. Most of the windows had now been boarded up as the repair work commenced, and a large tarpaulin was covering the section of the roof where the fire had broken out to stop water from getting in. Chris's second known [[Son-Chu|car]], a white Cadillac Seville, was in attendance at the time.

<center>
<gallery>
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</gallery>
</center>

===April 2015===
Yet more pictures were leaked in [[April 2015]], showing the house as it appeared after the renovations.

<center><gallery>
File:14BCApril2015I.jpg
File:14BCApril2015G.jpg
File:14BCApril2015F.jpg
File:14BCApril2015D.jpg
File:14BCApril2015C.jpg
File:14BCApril2015B.jpg
File:14BCApril2015H.jpg|Barb's car, still for sale.
File:14BCApril2015E.jpg
File:14BCApril2015.jpg|The front yard, still a sty.
File:Bobs greenhouse.jpeg|Bob's old greenhouse.
File:Itj5aFp.jpg
</gallery></center>

===June 2017-August 2021===
More, from [[June 2017]] to [[August 2021]].<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-217#post-2382102</ref>

<center><gallery>
File:14 BC in 2017 1.jpg|The lawn, overgrown but not ''quite'' as wrecked as it used to be.
File:14 BC in 2017 2.jpg|[[Son-Chu]], next to Barb's Dodge Caravan.
File:14 BC in 2017 3.jpg|While not visible in the photo, the license plate for Barb's car is "B. Weston".
File:14 BC in 2017 4.jpg|[[Patti]]'s doghouse.
File:14bc June 2019.jpg| [[June 2019]]
File:14bc620.jpg|[[June 2020]]
File:June2021Visit2.jpg|June 2020: [[Fanta|"Couldn't find any chocolate syrup, but I have some orange soda."]]
File:August2021House1.jpg|[[August 2021]]
File:August2021House2.jpg|August 2021
</gallery></center>

===September 2021===
{{main|Yard Tour (2021)}}

===December 2021===
On 16 [[December 2021]], [[Larry Vaughn]] took photos of the house at night, noting also that the [[Son-Chu|van]] was gone<ref>{{Cite Reddit|subreddit=ChrisChanSonichu|title=Just Went to Chris' House for the Second Time This Year. The Van's Gone.|post=ri3xbf/just_went_to_chris_house_for_the_second_time_this}}</ref> (as the photos were taken a few weeks after Barb's Fail to Yield Right of Way accident).
<center><gallery>
File:14 Branchland Court - 16 Dec 2021.jpg
File:14 Branchland Court - 16 Dec 2021 2.jpg
</gallery></center>

On 20 [[December 2021]], a Kiwi Farms user took a couple photos of the house. He disagreed with [[Larry Vaughn]]'s assertion that there was a "For Sale" sign, stating that he did not see one.<ref name=Dec21photos></ref> The overgrown lawn and bushes around the house also appeared to have been cut back by this time, suggesting that someone was given instructions to tend to it, revealing an abundance of plastic rubbish bins and other objects that had previously been hidden by the greenery.
<center><gallery>
File:14Branch01.jpg
File:14Branch02.jpg
</gallery></center>

===October 2022===
On 15 [[October 2022]] a user on the Kiwi Farms took pictures of the house in the day. The user notes how the patio had rotted and the shed had collapsed.<ref>[[Kiwi Farms posts (other users)#October Photos of 14 Branchland Court]]</ref>

<center><gallery>
File:Jeff the Thriller 14 Branchland Court photo1.jpg ‎
File:IMG 2717.jpg
File:Jeff the Thriller 14 Branchland Court photo3.jpg
File:Jeff the Thriller 14 Branchland Court photo4.jpg
</gallery></center>

===January 2023===
{{main|Redditor Ruckersville visit}}
On 22 [[January 2023]], Reddit user Iron_Taipan took photos of the yard. His photos showed bags of trash placed at the curb, including a [[Transformers]] toy box.

<center><gallery>
File:HouseJan23_1.png
File:HouseJan23_2.png
File:HouseJan23_3.png
File:HouseJan23_4.jpg
File:HouseJan23_5.jpg
</gallery></center>

===March 2023===
Posted to a Facebook group, sonichu christianposting, on 13 March 2023.<ref>https://www.reddit.com/r/ChrisChanSonichu/comments/11qu2s3/14_blc_as_of_today/</ref>

<center><gallery>
File:14 Branchland Ct Mar 2023.jpg
</gallery></center>

===May 2023===
{{main|Fan_visits#DATSJUSTWATINEED2BUS}}
On 3 [[May 2023]], Reddit user DATSJUSTWATINEED2BUS posted a series of images of the front yard of 14BC at night. Of note, it showed a well-kept exterior, as well as the lit window of [[Chris's room]] and his hand-drawn [[Sonichu_Comic|Sonichu]] poster. Another ween visited on 23 May 2023, taking a daytime photo that does not contain anything of note, although the bins at the front of the property were full of hedge clippings, indicating that a gardener had recently tended to the grounds of the house.

<center><gallery>
File:14BC1_May2023_(1).jpg
File:14BC2_May2023_(1).jpg
File:14BC3_May2023.jpg
File:Ideaguy_poster.jpg|The poster in Chris' window, located on the top right.
File:14BC 25May2023.jpeg|25 May
</gallery></center>

===August 2024===
On 10 [[August 2024]], Reddit user Quiet-Listen-7774 took several pictures of the exterior of the property. There appears to be a swivel chair, a storage tote, and a shelf in front of the house. The lawn was cut and appears to be regrowing, indicating that gardening and other maintenance at the house is ongoing.

<center><gallery>
File:14bc 8-10-24.jpg
File:14bc 2-min.jpg
File:14bc (2) 8-10-24.jpg
File:14bc (3) 8-10-24.jpg
</gallery></center>

==TSSSF cards==
14 Branchland Court has been featured as custom [[TSSSF]] cards.

<center><gallery>
File:14 Branchland Court TSSSF card.jpeg|The house, in which Chris refers to it as a "temple."
File:CWCs Temples Gazebo TSSSF.jpg|The abandoned gazebo. "Come on in."
</gallery></center>

== Videos ==

'''Rammspieler'''

A video panorama view from the street, taken 5 February 2015.

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = 14 Branchland Court: The Motion Picture
| ytid = nHRsavBhxGA
| stardate = 5 [[February 2015]]
| maker = Rammspieler
| subject = 14 Branchland Court
}}

Another from 2020.
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Sonichu HQ (Chris-Chan House June 2020)
| video = {{#ev:youtube|QOlC-LLQ7Vc}}
| stardate = 27 [[June 2020]]
| maker = Checkable Reality
| subject = 14 Branchland Court
}}

Another from 2022.
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Sonichu HQ (Chris-Chan House October 2022)
| video = {{#ev:youtube|9n9BBPqJjCo}}
| stardate = 11 [[October 2022]]
| maker = whitepaws
| subject = 14 Branchland Court
}}

==See also==
* [[Chris's room]]
* [[Chris's kitchen]]
* [[Ruckersville, VA|Ruckersville]]
* [[Charlottesville, VA|Charlottesville]]
* [[Tour of Christian's House]]
* [[Tour of Chris's House II]]
* [[2014 house fire]]
* [[Chris's homes]]
* [[Property tax assessment]] - Last appraisal of the house made by Greene County before the fire.
* [[Fan visits]]

==References==
<references />
{{Places}}
{{Health}}
{{Money}}
{{articleofthenow}}
[[Category:Chris's house]]
[[Category:Pages with fan videos]]

Chris and sex

2025-06-08T01:05:17Z

Anemichu: /* Chris in the act */

{{Honest}}
{{HealthDisclosure}}
{{Incomplete|Information regaring Chris' sexual frustration, and how he copes with it}}
[[Christian Weston Chandler|Chris]] has a warped view of '''sexual intercourse''' (a.k.a. '''hanky-panky''' and '''romps in the hay'''<ref>Chris has used this phrase since approximately [[2018]], including in [[:File:SchuComic12-9Page29.JPG|Sonichu #12-9]], on his [[July 2018 social media posts#BronyCon thoughts|polyamorous marriage]] and on his [[Incest fallout chat leaks#Chris texts about incest with his mother|incest with his mother]].</ref>), mostly stemming from stunted sexual development, [[Borb|a sheltered upbringing]], and the [[Autism|twisted, disjointed]] [[Chris and reality|worldview]] he acquired as a result. He first developed an understanding of sex from watching softcore porn on HBO at around age 16. He describes pornographic films as "educational".<ref>[[Miyamoto Saga#Chris Sets the Record STRAIGHT]]</ref>

==Knowledge of sex==
In his mind, Chris has mastered all there is to know about sex, and now regards himself as a bit of a guru. He has said that kissing a woman is "magical and delightful... sweet and melting like ice cream or chocolate", a description he [[Things Chris has ripped off|stole]] from ''[[Sailor Moon]]''.<ref>[[Mailbag 18#He might as well be talking about how to pilot the space shuttle|Mailbag 18]]</ref> In truth, for much of the time he was presenting this advice Chris had yet to even kiss a girl.<ref name="Jackie E-mails 2">[[Jackie E-mails 2]]</ref>

What he knows about sex he's picked up from rudimentary [[high school]] [[Dating education|sex education]] or [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases|pornography]]. This has engendered many false beliefs in Chris, which he sticks to religiously. Readers who brave his [[Chris Sex Logs|sex chat logs]] should immediately notice what's going wrong – Chris's fantasies are merely recreations of what he's seen in pornos, rather than plausible sexual experiences. For example, he believed that [[Kacey]] would welcome a brutal tit-fucking followed by load after load of [[navy]] to the face.<ref>[[Kacey Phone Call]]</ref>

Other examples of Chris's crude misconceptions about sex abound. He mimics female porn stars' sex positions, spreads an imaginary vagina a yard across,<ref name="JR Eyes">[[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV]]</ref> thinks that the clitoris is located on the female body where the [[wikipedia:Perineum|perineum]] is located on the male one<ref>[[September 2014 Facebook Posts#Introducing the Un-clit]]</ref> and believes that electric shocks to the vagina are pleasurable.<ref name="Cums cat">[[CWC Cums for a Cat]]</ref> He also seems to believe that a woman's vagina is higher up on the woman's body that it actually is;<ref>[[:File:SchuComicSP3P7.jpg]]</ref> this is undoubtedly due to his experience with his [[Kimmi|sex]] [[Officer Nasty|dolls]]. The "missionary cowgirl" position mentioned in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]] is a contradiction in terms. He can't even get the most basic double entendres correct, wearing a terrible [[CWC Cola|Mountain Dew]] parody shirt thinking it's an invitation for women to try and ride his broken [[penis]].<ref name="JR Eyes" /> He thinks that his [[Virgin with rage|virginity]] is a precious and sought-after treasure which women will come in droves to take (he even went so far as to use it as a bargaining chip to haggle with a prostitute), and believes that [[mass debating]] ultimately makes him better at sex.

With Chris's [[Chris and English|slippery grip on language]], he is also noticeably confused about basic sexual terminology. For example, Chris told Ivy he had a "sticky dream" about her. When Ivy asked if he meant a wet dream, he replied, "No, that's when you pee yourself, silly!"<ref>[[Ivy Q&A#Threats]]</ref> While he may have the best of intentions, his word choices unwittingly present him in a very bad light. He refuses to use common terms – either medical or slang – for sex organs, instead calling penises "[[duck]]s" and "[[pickle]]s", and vaginas and vulvae "[[china]]" or "tom-tom" out of a childish aversion borne of disgust.

In [[August 2011]], Chris said he is into female domination.<ref>[[Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya]]</ref> (going as far as to draw Sonichu and Rosechu performing the act in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]]).

===Reproductive Biology===
{{Main|Biology#Reproductive biology}}
[[File:Female anatomy according to chris.png|thumb|A moderately detailed portrait of what Chris probably thought females looked like before meeting [[Mia Hamm]].]]

Chris's understanding on reproductive biology had primarily come from what he had seen in porn.

===Books on the Subject===

Chris had obtained a copy of the book [[Ultimate Guide to Sex and Disability]], which he had told [[Null]] about on 5 July 2021. As a result of reading this book, Chris came to believe that he could mentor people about dating and sex. Chris had especially shown this in conversations he had with [[Fiona]], where he attempts to advise her on how to approach a potential lover when she goes off to college.<ref>[[Fiona DMs#Dating Advice]]</ref> Chris had seemed to twist or misunderstand many of the passages found in this book, taking it to be a book on how to perform sex on disabled people, rather than one ''for'' disabled people.

==Moral Basis==

{{Dated}}

===Straightness===

{{main|Chris and sexuality}}

Chris's stance on sexual orientations have always been iffy at best. Prior to his transition to a Tomgirl, he has shown a fear of losing his straightness. This obsessive demand for people to "STAY STRAIGHT" has been one of the first noted and exploited aspects of Chris since his discovery. Many trolls had jokingly declared this as an indicator of him repressing his sexuality in some fashion, only for it to end up being the case in the long run.

===Religion===
[[Image:DatingEducation.jpg|thumb|250px|69ing? Intercourse? ''Really''? In a ''children's'' comic? Because they should know all about this stuff.]]
{{quote|You have heard that it was said by them of old time, You shall not commit adultery: but I say to you, that whosoever looks on a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart.|Matthew 5:27-28}}

Sex was at one point viewed, through Chris's eyes, by the Bible – or rather, by his religion, as Chris's Biblical knowledge is extremely poor. Chris was very strict on keeping to the word of God when male homosexuality is the topic, vehemently stating that he ''hates'' homos, but with no hesitation views lesbian porn and approves of it [[Mass debating|masturbatorily]]<ref>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref>, and as of 2014, seemed to be adopting a more progressive view of even gay men and their rights (albeit begrudgingly). In 2015 Chris made a video lamenting his "past" homophobia and clarifying that he apparently now has great liking and admiration for male homosexuality, [[Retroactive continuity|retconning]] the viscous homophobic tirade of [[Sonichu 10]] into a bizarre zombie apocalypse, implying that he realizes religion is not an excuse for discrimination. Another violation of his Christian morals is the fact that he planned on losing his virginity on the [[Third date|third or fourth date]] with his true sweetheart (read: first girl who will last three dates with Chris). This is, of course, blatant violation of the Christian value of marriage before sex.

The Bible also frowns upon [[Nudes|pornographers]], of which he is very guilty and holds no apparent [[Chris and remorse|remorse]]. These double standards cause many trolls to despise him, seeing as he selectively chooses what to denigrate and what is OK in his own personal dogma, although to be somewhat fair, he's far from the only follower of the Christian faith to do so.

Despite people pointing out these contradictions, even quoting passages of the Bible, he will deny it. This is most likely because he goes to [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|a very liberal church]], so any question about premarital sex is probably interpreted quite liberally, and Chris believes that his church and ''only'' his church defines the entirety of religious morality - as it applies to him, anyway. When Chris asks Rocky about passages quoted to him by [[trolls]], she only fuels his à la carte Christianity by saying things like sex before marriage is okay as long as the couple is in love, which contradicts Christian doctrine.<ref>[[Mumble 8]]</ref> In summary, Chris picked and chose what parts of Christian doctrine suit his own prejudices, and disregards the ones that would interfere with his [[Love Quest]].

===Sexism===

Chris seems to consider a female sexual partner as a rubber stamp over his (alleged) sexual orientation. Flying in the face of any moral system he's ever held, he announced his desire to upload on the Internet a video of his first full sexual intercourse, even if his hypothetical partner refused to consent to it.<ref>[[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence#The Introduction Image Space is NOT Ad Space (CCS)]]</ref> After further prodding, he added that he would simply hide the camera, record the event without her consent and blur her face before making the video public.<ref>[[Mailbag 31#In which Chris crosses yet another line]]</ref> In [[CCWC's Final Warning to the Second CWC]], Chris indicated that if a woman accused him of being gay in person, he would sexually assault them by demanding they submit to a kiss and allow him to videotape the act, possibly as a way of proving his straightness.

For Chris, as stated above, [[Women's rights|a woman is just a living, sentient sex-toy]], existing only to validate him as a heterosexual. As long as they're straight and younger than him, of course.

==Chris in the act==
[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|frame|right|Christian [[For Julie's Eyes Only|professing his love]] for "[[BlueSpike|Julie]]".]]
Leaked tapes of Chris's audio sex with [[Julie]], and the infamous sex tape with Kimmi shed light on Chris as he acts out on his fantasies. In particular, the sex tape shows how Chris assumes ''female'' positions, notably riding on top of Kimmi in a scene straight out of a porno. It seems that Chris's entirety of knowledge about sexual relationships stems from ignoring the [[JERKS|men]] in pornography (due to fear of becoming a [[homo]]).

However, it should be noted that in most of Chris's Rule 34 drawings the characters do tend to assume positions which are fitting for their gender, including Chris.<ref>For examples, see the [[Sonichu 8#The uncensored scenes|uncensored panels]] from Sonichu 8, [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack]], [[CWCRockin4Way.jpg]], the [[Giant Penis Comic]] and [[Jackie E-mails 14]].</ref> It might be that Chris adopts female positions not so much due to ignorance regarding sex, but more because of [[Tomgirl pictures|his identification with the opposite gender]].

Chris's view of cunnilingus, put on display in [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV]], involves slobbering all over a woman's vagina. Despite all his knowledge of porn, he fails to see how cunnilingus is more than just slobbering, but proper tongue action to stimulate the clitoris.

In the leaked media, Chris displays that he may have some issues with delayed orgasm. This can either be physiological (bent duck, [[Obesity|being overweight]], lack of endurance) or psychological in nature (performance anxiety, high expectations, intrusive homoerotic thoughts, subconscious guilt about sex), or a combination thereof.

In the 2018 [[All Star]] video, Chris is seen tugging his [[duck]] along to the song. He remains flaccid the entire time; his inability to get an erection is possibly a side effect of [[Transgender|HRT]]. If this is true, Chris will certainly not be getting any hanky-panky in the future.

During his time losing his virginity to a [[Mia Hamm| prostitute]] its worth noting that he first received a blowjob, then demanded cowgirl before possible missionary later; [[Obesity| but luckily for her]] he couldn't last very long and finished just after she rid him for a bit; this is important as it points to 2 big problems with Chris; first his lack of self control due to him [[Navy| finishing]] so quickly, second is that he ordered possibly the laziest sex position in the book, with Mia doing pretty much all of the physical exercise with Chris being a lazy fuck.

Chris's second sexual partner in his life was none other than his own [[Barb|mom]], the exact details of the [[Affair with Mother|incestuous affair]] are a bit vague but needless to say every act described by Chris is extremely disturbing and not for the faint of heart.

===Contraceptives===

{{quote|Confidentially, I wear a condom during the second half when I masturbate; I use Trojan or LIfestyles brand (Trojan mostly)

And I used condoms when I fooled with the [[Officer Nasty|L.D.s]] as well.|Chris, [[Jackie E-mails 1]]}}

Condoms, or as Chris has called them "'''raincoats'''", are thin latex coverings worn over a man's penis for the purpose of birth control. However, Chris seemed to understand the condom as more of a symbol for promoting safe premarital sex rather than as a contraceptive. Aside from promoting safe sex and justifying premarital sex, Chris has also drawn his male Sonichu characters with condoms in order to censor their penises. Chris has stated that before his third date with [[Blanca]], he'd wear a condom for the first two times they've had sex, only to have non-protected sex by the third date, showing that he also believed that condoms serve more as some kind of gateway to pregnancy. Chris had a box of chocolate-flavored condoms that he purchased to be prepared for his first time. Chris had given a few different dates for when they expired; some time in 2010<ref>[[Chris Sex Logs#Condoms]]</ref> and January 2013.<ref>[[IRC (27 December 2008)]]</ref>

Chris reportedly also wore a condom that was flavored like green apple while engaging in sex with Mia Hamm.<ref>[[July 2020 social media posts]]</ref> It's not entirely clear whether the condom was entirely successful or not due to him mentioning that a "Smidge" of Navy had leaked out after their first round together, meaning he either kept them in his pocket far too long, the condom didn't fit entirely properly around his [[Duck]], he became flaccid way faster than he should have, or he's an idiot who mistook a smear of lube or vaginal discharge for semen; knowing Chris any of these [[Chris and negligence| explanations]] [[Duck| are]] [[Health| equally]] [[Slow in the minds| possible]]. For those wondering however, it's probably safe to assume [[Mia Hamm]] won't be harboring [[Crystal]] any time soon; even by some non-existent chance he managed to get her pregnant, she would have likely been on the pill anyway.

Chris would later reveal to [[Null]] that he was using a condom while having sex with his "over 50 girlfriend", who was later discovered to be [[Barb]]. While ploughing a woman like Barb would cause anyone to instinctively wear the thickest condom available, then get themselves tested a few times over just in case (all of which Chris did); realistically there wasn't much reason to do so since the risk of STD and pregnancy was non-existent since both were [[Health|(at least where STIs were concerned)]] clean and both were completely infertile.

== Sexual Frustration ==

Chris has had a yearning to have a girl to have sex with since the start of his [[Love Quest]] in 2003. The first manifestation of this was when he was clawing at [[Megan]] where his pining for her went ignored or denied as any sane person would.

Throughout the first half of [[2021]], Chris' search for a sweetheart had resumed. Chris has expressed great sexual frustration, yearning for a physical girl to have sex with over his [[polyamorous marriage|ficticious sweethearts]]. According to [[Kyle]], at some point in [[February 2021]] Chris expressed interest in wanting to get a hooker,<ref name=feb21hooker>[[The Place chats (March 2021)#Chris wanted a hooker]]</ref> something which Chris was once not in favor of.

In [[March 2021]], following a masturbation session, Chris had a conversation with the [[Watchmen]], in which he discussed how, despite not disliking or disapproving of the act of masturbation, he felt that he was [[Gender dysphoria|born the wrong gender]].<ref>[[Masturbation discussions#16 March 2021]]</ref> In a [[May 2021]] conversation, he claimed that over the years, he would continually consume pornography and masturbate to get "the hard-on". He expressed how until recently, he felt that he had not fully explored his sexuality, nor any other means to stimulate himself, and even then claims to still overthink the process of [[List of things Chris has shoved up his ass|inserting a dildo or vibrator up his ass]]. <ref>[[Masturbation discussions#18 May 2021]]</ref>

==Means of Coping with Sexual Frustration==

=== Masturbation and Porn Consumption ===

{{Main|Mass debating}}

Chris has had a history of masturbating, starting when he discovered he could stimulate his penis by rubbing it against a washcloth when he was 15. In 2009, he made use of a washbasin in the kitchen of his house while performing the act, and had claimed in the [[Ivy Q&A]] that he made use of a pillow that he'd fold in half, treating it as a mastrubation tool. Since then, masturbation has been an outlet for Chris's sexual frustration.

In a [[February 2021]] conversion with [[The Watchmen]], Chris said "Masturbation takes Fifteen LONG, Tiring and Annoying Minutes, with my body, regardless of whatever method or tool utilized. And it has literally been that long in unenjoyable time since I first rubbed one out while my body was 15. And that was Looooong before I ever started on HRT in 2016. So, not only is masturbation out of the question, it's more misery-inducing."<ref>[[Masturbation discussions#27 February 2021]]</ref>

=== Drawing Porn ===

{{quote|As for the drawing itself, I've realized that it was done not only out of inspired fantasy, angst against E.D., and love for you, but also a major release for my crazy, mixed-up hormones. If I didn't have the foresight to put my pent-up frustrations and feelings in the form of something, I might have become an abusive maniac, so thank god for allowing me to release my bottled up frustrations in a more positive, yet not so "Politically Correct", and not physically hurting others, method.|Chris on how he might have approached Megan had he not drawn [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]]<ref>[[Megan Emails, 2008#Chris continues bothering her about ED]]</ref>}}

Chris has on more than one ocassion drawn pornography of his own in order to release sexual tension. Chris claimed to [[Megan Schroeder]] that he had in part created the controversial drawing [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]] because he felt that doing so would inhibit him from sexually advancing on Megan, as he had feelings for her, and would have become an "abusive maniac" had he not created the drawing. The fact that Chris had decided to use what was essentially a product of his own pent-up sexual frustration as a means of attempting to get his Encyclopedia Dramatica page down only seemed to leave a much more bitter taste in Megan's mouth after announcing this.

During the period when Chris became much more sexually frustrated in 2021, he displayed this more openly towards friends, and even on his social media. He sent a picture of his Chris Chan Sonichu persona wearing a [[negligee]] while giving a seductive look to [[The WCT]], and talked to him about how arousing it is to wear one.

=== Sex Toys ===

Chris has made [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases|numberable purchases]] for sex toys, porn DVDs and inflatable sex dolls.

=== Relationships with OCs ===

For a time, partly due to influence from the [[Idea Guys]], Chris has temporarily given up on his search for a sweetheart in pursuit for being in relationships with fictional characters instead.

=== Wet Dreams ===

Chris has also had his share of wet [[dreams]], particularly whenever he had held strong feelings for his flavor of the week. The first of these wet dreams was of [[PandaHalo]], where he dreamed about the both of them getting naked, having sex, and then Chris finally climaxing. Chris also had a dream where he was in a labyrinth filled with water, where he met a woman and had sex with her, Chris recreated the dream in a Flipnote animation. The strangest of these was of one where Chris claims that he "almost had sex" with the Sonic character Sally Acorn, which had left him sexually frustrated afterwards. Chris talks about another wet dream he had two months later, this time of the ''Sonic X'' character Chris Thorndyke aged-up and "handsome". Chris also expresses the sexual frustration he felt after waking up from this dream too.<ref>[[MKR DMs]]</ref>

=== Sex with Mother ===

It had long been joked and speculated by trolls, christorians, and observers alike that Chris has much more intimate feelings with [[Barbara Chandler|his mother]] than he let on. These speculations were confirmed in July of 2021 when screenshots were leaked of Chris detailing to Isabella Loretta Janke his incestuous exploits. Null later revealed worrying conversations he had previously with Chris about a new "over 50's" girlfriend he had been using condoms with. We will leave it to you to put 2 and 2 together.

==Sexual Deviance==

Chris's skewed basis of his understanding of sex leads him to exhibiting several instances of sexual deviance.

===Inappropriate Interactions with Women===

To say the least, Chris's social interactions hinder his ability to understand sex etiquette.

===Pedophilia and Age Disparity===
{{main|Pedofork}}
{{Wise|he is a pedophile.}}

Pedophilia has always been a touchy subject in regards to Chris. Chris had at first attempted to deny all claims that he was a pedophile, even creating a new word, "pedofork", as a sort of comeback to those who referred to him as such, apparently being created solely to make the word rhyme in "I'm not a pedofork, you dorks". Chris has tried to retain this image by removing any references that may be interpreted as him being a pedophile in his Sonichu comics. Most infamously, Chris had characters in [[Sonichu 8]] make comments about "dumb laws" when [[Zapina Rosechu]], who is 14 years old, asks to participate in stripping for Women's Rights.

At a glance, Chris seems to adhere to the age of consent, once advertising on his [[Attraction Sign|Attraction Signs]] that he would only date someone of legal age. Chris however does not seem to understand or care about how creepy it is for him to be attracted to women that are half his age, and seems to see it as yet another barrier for his Love Quest. Chris has cat-called an artist whom he believed to be "entering young adulthood", has made sexual remarks towards [[Bella]]; despite her having no interest in Chris, and has shown arousal when [[Fiona]] exposed herself to him.

===Necrophillia===

While Chris himself has never engaged in sex with a dead body to the best of anyone's knowledge, Chris has [[Jail Letter - 29 July 2022|recently]] been referring to barb as a zombie like husk since even before they began engaging in [[Affair with Mother|their affair]] and that her soul has already moved on to her rosechu form in C-197; complaining that her lifeless body was still clinging to life and preventing him from going back home. Meaning that Chris is at least partially comfortable with the idea of having sex with his dead mother.

In another disturbing incident, Chris recorded [[It's not that cold]], where he proceeds to imitate {{w|Buffalo Bill (character)|Buffalo Bill}} and pretends to get inside his dead dog [[Patti Chandler|Patti]]. While not engaging in sex with her, he does take a bizarre sexual pleasure in wearing her corpse (or at least pretending to do so, since he was too lazy to actually dig her up).

===Bestiality===
{{quote|I can imagine myself doing it with a [[Patti-chan|collie]] at least. you know, like Lassie.|Chris to [[PandaHalo]]<ref name="collie">[[IRC (27 December 2008)]]</ref>}}
[[File:PattiLuv.jpg|thumb|Run, Patti, run!]]
[[File:Super-mode.jpg|thumb|left|90px|Chris, sporting a [[ECV 00002‎|homemade fursuit]].]]

In [[December 2008]], Chris told [[PandaHalo]] he would be willing to have sex with a female dog for her.<ref name="collie" /> However, in his [[Chris-chan Discusses...‎|interview with ScrewAttackEurope]], Chris says he's against bestiality, then hoists himself by his own petard by claiming that Sonichu & co. are not "half-humans" but "all-animals" with human form; so technically this isn't bestiality, as they're animals having sex with each other.

Chris suggested that Brian from ''[[Family Guy]]'' be paired up with "any sexy breed" of dog.<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20161007175309/http://archive.sonichu.com:80/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Family_Guy The Family Guy article on CWCipedia]</ref>

In [[The Red-Maned Deer]], Chris recites a poem he wrote about having sex with a deer, but at the end of it states, "This was, in fact, NOT an act of bestiality. For you see, the Red-Maned Deer I have been communicating with and tracking, is really...my lo-my womanly sweetheart, named [[Jacklyn Romy]]."<ref>[[The Red-Maned Deer]]</ref> The fact that the deer is Jackie is obvious, but in spite of this he explicitly stated that it was her at the end.

In a photo of the [[Rental House]] from June 2014, the Chandler minivan bears a bumper sticker reading "I Sleep with Dogs".<ref>[[:File:Chandler Cars 1600w.jpg]]</ref> What exactly this means is yet to be determined.

====Is Chris a furry?====
{{Wise|he is a furry.}}

{{quote|I am half-Sonichu and half-Pokemon, thus making me a "furry".|Chris, May 2018, during the aftermath of the [[Idea Guys]] saga.<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20220209025754/https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/997320832040005634</ref>}}

Whether Chris could actually be considered a furry was debated for a long time.<ref>From [[Sarah May Skype Logs#Chris tries to leave|the Sarah May Skype Logs]]: [7:17:25] '''Sarah May''': Did you feel sexually aroused when you drew them? [7:17:34] '''Christopher C.W.C.''': a bit.</ref> There are some things that point in that direction. Chris certainly gets aroused by provocative drawings of anthropomorphic animals (at least when they are [[Sonic]] characters), and he has drawn unsolicited porn of his own Sonic recolors. [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]] is in many ways similar to a fursona, and Chris even role-played the character while cybering with [[Julie]].<ref name="Cums cat" /> Finally, in the [[Giant Penis Comic]], Chris and [[Ivy]] both transform into anthropomorphic animals during the act of sex. On the other hand, [[Mimms]] and [[Lucas]] noted that Chris was prejudiced against a male furry who patronized [[The GAMe PLACe]] because he happened to be [[gay]].<ref>[[Mimms and Lucas Q&A#Racism and homophobia]]</ref> Given the high proportion of gay and bisexual men in the furry fandom, Classic Chris would almost certainly have been uncomfortable at any kind of furry gathering.

In [[May 2018]], under the influence of the [[Idea Guys]], Chris declared himself a furry.<ref>[[May_2018_social_media_posts#Michael_Hirtes_BTFO]]</ref> The Idea Guys also [[brainwashed]] him into believing he is in a [[polyamorous marriage]] with his anthropomorphic [[imaginary friends]] [[Magi-Chan]] and [[Cryzel]], and Chris believes he has had sexual relations with these imaginary friends.<ref>[[July 2018 social media posts#BronyCon thoughts]]</ref>

Also of note is that in [[July 2020|mid-2020]], he binge-watched the [[Netflix]] anime ''BNA: Brand New Animal'', commenting it was "very good" but said nothing further than that.<ref>[[July_2020_social_media_posts#Animu]]</ref>

While Chris may loosely qualify as a furry due to his obsession with anthropomorphic [[Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]] and [[My Little Pony|ponies]], he has never shown an interest in the broader furry community.

===Oedipus Complex===
In simple terms, it is the attachment of the child to the parent of the opposite sex, accompanied by envious and aggressive feelings toward the parent of the same sex.<ref> https://www.uvm.edu/~jbailly/courses/tragedy/student%20second%20documents/Oedipus%20Complex.html#:~:text=Definition,parent%20of%20the%20same%20sex.</ref> Chris has exuded such an Oedipus Complex for years given his feelings for his mother coddling him while also showing resentment for Bob now and then, especially whenever he’d scold Chris for his antics.
See below for more details:
* [[Affair with Mother]]
* [[Chris_and_sex#Sex_with_Mother|Sex with Mother]]
* [[Chris_and_sex#Dreams_of_sex_with_Barb|Dreams of sex with Barb]]
* [[Chris_and_sex#Actual_sex_with_Barb|Actual sex with Barb]]

{{-}}

==Prostitution==
[[Image:Virginbreaker.png|thumb|Chris's leaked [[Facebook]] announcement that he had lost his virginity. Initially igniting a firestorm of controversy, Chris himself let it slip that she was found "somewhere on the backpage" soon after.]]

Given how badly Chris wanted to lose his virginity, many observers have wondered why he didn't immediately spend some of his [[tugboat]] on a prostitute. [[Mumble 4]], from [[February 2009]], answered that question for a while. There, Chris explained that paying for sex would render the act "meaningless," and he was – in a rare display of common sense – afraid of contracting a sexually transmitted disease.

Needs must as the devil drives, though. While being blackmailed by [[Jack Thaddeus]] in the summer of [[2009]], Chris attempted to solicit the services of a [[Craigslist]] prostitute to fuck on camera so he could recover his hacked [[PlayStation Network]] accounts. After describing his personal problems to the prostitute, she hung up on him. Chris was apparently trying to get free sex from the hooker with long, rambling stories about his horrible life to try and gain sympathy. He was genuinely shocked when she didn't offer to fuck him out of pity, unaware that prostitutes, by definition, only have sex with men for money.

Previously, in [[March 2009]], [[Bryan Bash]] had sent a trio of prostitutes to [[14 Branchland Court|Chris's house]] so he would no longer be a virgin with rage. [[Hooker incident|Hilarity ensued]].

By the beginning of [[2010]], Chris's views on prostitution had further softened. According to his [[Vivian Gee E-mails 2|conversations with Vivian Gee]], around the turn of the year he was attempting to save $100 out of his monthly budget to buy himself a whore for his 28th [[birthday]]. This, presumably, was the "hundred dollars for a damn hooker" he referred to when [["Damian Antaria", PLEASE, Don't Leave Me - I NEED YOU!!!|begging the Wallflower for sex]] on YouTube in [[March 2010]].

Between [[April 2010|April]] and [[July 2010]], under the name of [[Carlos Chantor]], Chris tried to offer himself up as a male escort. He described himself as "[[Chris and reality|Experienced for Her Pleasure]]", with an [[obesity|average]] body type.<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 6]]</ref>

Later, under the guise of his troll persona [[JenkinsJinkies]], Chris attempted to acquire the contact details of the hookers Brian Bash had previously hired. While it is possible that Chris merely wished to make his disguise more convincing by implying that 14 year old Jenkins wished to hire prostitutes, it seems far more likely that Chris actually was considering hiring Brian's girls.

In [[April 2012]] a [[Facebook]] status leaked in which Chris announced that he was no longer a virgin. Suspicion arose that this was due to the help of a hooker. Chris provided further evidence suggesting that [[Mia Hamm|the girl]] was a prostitute on 1 [[May 2012|May]] when he wrote in a [[Facebook#Hey, Trollies|Facebook note]] that his virgin breaker can be found "somewhere on the [[Wikipedia:Backpage|backpage]]", a website known for featuring sex service ads.<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20210206132219/https://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/19/opinion/kristof-not-quite-a-teen-yet-sold-for-sex.html?_r=1]</ref> On 28/29 June 2014 Chris openly admitted that his first time was with a prostitute, and that he had sex with her twice.<ref>[[Other documents#Chris's wingman]]</ref>

In [[June 2016]], Chris himself made [[Women Only Need Apply - No STD's|another attempt]] to enter the prostitution business, now as a [[Tomgirl|trans woman]], going by the name "Stephanie Bustcakes". Predictably, Chris was unable to find any "women of any orientation" who were interested in paying him $100 to have sex either "one way or the lesbian way", and the Stephanie Bustcakes persona has not yet reappeared.

[[File:ChrisChanSexForMoney.png|thumb|200px]]
On 24 April 2018, while under the influence of the [[Idea Guys]], who had allegedly been extorting him out of thousands of dollars, Chris announced:<ref>[[April 2018 social media posts#Will provide house tour and suck dicks for money]]</ref>

{{quotebox|Anyone living locally to me in Virginia, or visiting in Charlottesville, I’ll give y’all BJs for money too. Serious.}}

A fan on Twitter messaged him about it. In their conversation, Chris said:<ref name=price>[[:File:NAME YOUR PRICE!!.jpeg]]</ref>

{{quotebox|Consider me a beginner with experience blowing [[Cryzel and Magi-Chan|my loving boyfriend]], willing to learn and adapt further. $50 for that BJ from this celeb; if he wants butt sex, that will be $100. Cash only.}}

Chris told [[CWCProtectSquad]] member Tings Tingz that he was indeed serious about prostituting himself, had several offers, but had not taken on any customers. When asked if he would consider, Chris responded, "a little from Column 'A' and the latter from Column 'B'".<ref>[[Tings Tingz DMs#Prostitution post]]</ref>

After the [[Guard Dogs]] rescued Chris from the Idea Guys' influence, he reversed course and disavowed the prostitution messages on 7 May 2018, saying he had been coerced.<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20191107173201/https://twitter.com/cwcsonichu/status/993693423084318720</ref> He went further on 25 May, saying he had been forced to write such things, and implied the Idea Guys had been behind it.<ref>[[May 2018 social media posts#Calling out the Idea Guys]]</ref>

According to [[Kyle]], in [[February 2021]], Chris wanted a hooker and asked Kyle to ask [[Null]] to get him one.<ref name=feb21hooker></ref>

==Incest==
{{See also|Affair with Mother}}
{{Split Off}}
{{Quote|I, myself, Did have dreams of having sex with [[Barbara Chandler|my mother]].|Chris, 2016}}

[[File:CWCSonichu Rule34.jpeg|thumb|Chris having sex with his "son," Sonichu, in order to fulfill a prophecy to bring Crystal into the world.]]

Chris has long been suspected of having unnatural feelings about [[sex]] and family.

In [[2007]], Chris attempted to shock [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] into submission by posting his own [[Rule 34]] drawings, including one of himself [[Shecameforcwc.jpg|fingerbanging a nude brunette woman]]. ED users immediately concluded this was Crystal, Chris's imaginary twin sister in the comics. This charge infuriated Chris and therefore became the conventional wisdom. By the time Chris successfully convinced anyone that it was really [[Megan Schroeder]] in the drawing, the notion that Chris wants to bang his imaginary twin sister had already stuck.

[[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|Crystal]], Chris's imaginary twin sister, appeared as a [[:image:153-GirlfriendsGift.jpg|"girlfriend" card]] he made for ''[[Yu-Gi-Oh!]]'', and her attractiveness and desirability are brought up several times in the [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'']] comics well after being established as Chris's twin. Chris has shown complete ignorance in matters incestuous before; his [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]] are all related (despite their type and appearance differences, they all come from [[homos|Sonic and the same male Pikachu]] – apart from that fact, they were all created by Chris and acknowledge him as such – Sonichu and Rosechu calling him father), but many of them are paired off with one another (notably Sonichu/Rosechu, Bubbles/Blake, and Magi/Silvana – Simonla was technically made by someone else), banging and some even [[Sonichu and Rosechu's children|having]] [[Sandy Rosechu|kids]]. Chris's own comic children are a form of incest – as Chris impregnated himself with his navy. Chris shrugs off [[Autism|all medical/science facts]] and lists the two as perfectly healthy and Autism Free.

Chris first expounded his views on incest to the internet on 31 [[January 2009]] during the [[Mumble 1|first Mumble chat]], when it was revealed that he did not fully understood the meaning of the word "incest". While he showed aversion toward incest in the chat, his condemnation of it was lukewarm, saying that he would only "definitely discourage that" and that lesbian incest is "possibly OK" due to no reproduction being involved. Compare this to his statements about male homosexuality from the same chat ("I hate homo males [...] I'd sooner have a [[Tomgirl Saga|sex change]] before I would ever turn into a homo") or to his statements about male homosexuality from earlier that month, saying that he would make it a crime and force its practitioners into having sex with members of the opposite gender.<ref>[[IRC (02 January 2009)]]</ref>

A year later, Chris's views became staunch. When a correspondent in the [[Mailbag]] pointed out that Chris's state allows cousin marriage but not same-sex marriage, Chris furiously denied it and wrote, "Cousin-Marriage is just as Terrible and Unholy as MARRYING YOUR OWN MOTHER OR FATHER!"<ref>[[Common Questions#5 January 2010]]</ref> When another correspondent responded to Chris by saying that he is happily married to his cousin and that their marriage is indeed legal in Virginia, Chris answered him by saying he was destined to hell for his relationship,<ref>[[Mailbag 34#Good luck in hell]]</ref> not realizing that incest is shown in a positive light in [[Chris and religion|the Bible]]. When the subject came up again in the next mailbag, Chris said that sexual relations between cousins are just as wrong as incest between parents and their children or between siblings, and that all those relationships were condemned in the "same part" of the Bible,<ref>[[Mailbag 35#I think he wanted a specific verse]]</ref> which is not actually true.<ref> [https://web.archive.org/web/20051223102404/http://www.cousincouples.com/?page=religion]</ref>

===Incest fics===
In [[February 2010]], Chris notably did not react to [[:File:Fkinglie.png|an extremely NSFW ad of himself]] on the [[CWCipedia]] depicting himself fingering Barb [[SheCameForCWC.jpg|like he did with a former friend in a certain illustration]], despite reacting to [[I am Alive|an ad claiming that he was dead]].

During the [[Idea Guy]] saga, the troll convinced Chris that [[Magi-Chan]] foretold of a prophecy in which [[Crystal]] would be born by Chris mating with Sonichu. He also informed Chris that if this was drawn, he wouldn't have to do it in real life. Chris complied<ref>https://archive.md/AL1PT</ref>. During the nonsensical [[Sonichu 13| issue 13]] of Sonichu incest is unsurprisingly everywhere, from [[Chris Chan Sonichu]] getting married to [[Magichan]] to Chris and Sonichu raping each other.

To the [[Watchmen]], Chris chatted about how he was upset over implications of incest in the ''Sonichu'' family, stating that he had written a piece to dispute the "ugh, Incest bullshit."<ref>[[Chats leaked by MKRs Bloody Chunks#Ugh, Incest]]</ref>

In a Facebook post from [[January 2020]], Chris reiterated his opposition to incest, writing "I, personally, seriously disapprove of incest and would never practice it at all" and "The Bottom Line is: Incest is Never 'Wincest' (Epic UGH!)".<ref>[[January 2020 social media posts#Incest is not wincest]]</ref>

In [[November 2023]], Chris replied to a [[Twitter]] post that asked him if he could list examples of what he meant by "strange ideas and dreams." Chris stated that he strongly disapproves of incest fan fictions involving himself and characters like [[Sonichu]] Prime and [[Rosechu]] Prime. He also criticized fan fictions with him and his [[mother]], He said some people thought about or wrote these stories before [[July 2021]] in reference to the Incest Call being released and his arrest, he claimed he does not support them and believes such ideas are wrong and warned that thinking about them could lead to negative consequences in other timelines or realities.<ref>[[November 2023 social media posts#Rant against incest fics]]</ref>

===Dreams of sex with Barb===
On 10 August 2016, Chris posted a [[Facebook statuses|response]] to a mother-son couple who were arrested for incest. He admitted to "[having] dreams of having sex with my mother" but "Never acting on them ever." Among other things, he also implied that incest "offers a chance for better teaching the child how to better satisfy their eventual partner(s)." All this is in stark contrast to his earlier condemnation of incest, which raises the question of whether Chris was being TRUE and HONEST but changed his opinion later thanks to his growing degeneracy, or the likelier possibility it was [[Chris and hypocrisy|all for show]].

{{quotebox|I have a few things to say in response to this article. Firstly, the child was over 18, and surely the mother has talked it out with him beforehand. The child might have had social problems, or a situation where socializing or going out to socialize with other people, was a Greater Difficulty. Financial situation to prevent paying someone else to come over and help out in the situation. Moreover, it was the lifelong affections between parent and child. Also, the mother probably could not bear any ovum for children anymore.
Anyhow, who among Everyone in this world has not had a dream of having sex with one of their parents? Never acting on them ever, I, myself, Did have dreams of having sex with my mother.
Although incest is quite controversial topic, but there are circumstances where there would be not so much harm as one may think, feel or believe. The child is over 18; the mother is unable to have any more children at the time; birth control and protection is available and can be used (in a case of father/daughter, birth control Definitely should be used anyhow). Also, consider if the child is adopted; not as much biological.
Plus, this offers a chance for better teaching the child how to better satisfy their eventual partner(s). The schools can only teach from books; not so much practice. And Nobody wants to end up being a 20 or 30-plus year old Virgin. I know; That is a Huge, Enduring Pain.
Unless the sex act was abusive, hurtful, or Would result in an unwanted birth of a physical or mental challenged child, I would not judge or persecute the parent and child. I would encourage the child to socialize more; maybe make it easier for the child to meet more people his/her age.
Do Not send the mother and son to jail!}}

On 13 September 2019, while [[Spirit possession|role-playing]] as Magi-Chan, Chris would describe Barb as a "guilty pleasure waifu."<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts#Barbara was more of a "guilty pleasure" waifu]]</ref>

===Actual sex with Barb===

While the prospect of Chris having sex with Barb was joked about for many years, most people did not believe Chris would actually go through with it. Before the [[Incest call]] was leaked, there were numerous warning signs of what was to come, mainly being the fact Barb would force Chris to spoon her in bed for many years, and telling Mia Hamm that the sexual massage he gave her was the same that he gave his mother. Their actions around each other have indicated a history of incestuous interest, however many just assumed that this was a combination of Chris's [[autism]] making him act inappropriately and Barb's infamously controlling behaviour.

After the incest calls were leaked it was revealed that Chris had been engaging in regular sex with Barb every 3 nights or so since 27 June 2021. His "seduction" methods included giving her full body massages while making attempts to finger her, kissing her on the lips with Barb refusing to open her mouth and Chris making "Psychic connections" with her before, during and after their romps in the hay.

It's also noteworthy that Chris refers to Barb as "Barbie Chan" almost exclusively now; whether this has something to do with her supposed anime fanfiction characteristics, a bizarre pet name or Chris trying to subconsciously distance himself from their familial bonds is unknown.

==Rape==
Chris was very apathetic about the idea of consent, and to a larger extent, the act of rape. When [[PandaHalo]] told him she was raped by [[Clyde Cash]], he reacted nonchalantly. He even thought it would be appropriate for Panda to ''move in'' with her rapist ([[Chris and religion|which is technically in-line with certain archaic Christian principles]]), whom he called a "good man" for regretting the rape and for being willing to take care of the ensuing child.<ref>[[IRC (21 January 2009)]]</ref> Later on, long after the PandaHalo saga was over, he would wish her and her rapist a happy marriage.<ref>[[Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts (CWCipedia page)#Sarah Cassandra McKenzie, A.K.A. PandaHalo]]</ref> In [[iPods Down and Listen Up]], he didn't seem to realize that his improvised lyrics detailed a sexual act that would almost certainly be construed by others as rape. Chris eventually compared his ordeals with the trolls, particularly during the Classic Era to rape in his Facebook posts. (Since [[BlueSpike]]'s [[Julie Reveals Herself|most infamous incident]] involved an act that could be described as sexual abuse in front of several people, this is admittedly a fitting description.)

As far as ''Chris'' being a potential rapist is concerned, the situation was more complicated. For starters, as explained earlier, he admitted that he drew [[ShecameforCWC.JPG]] to prevent himself from acting on his sexual impulses against [[Megan Schroeder]], who had previously scolded him for inappropriately touching her. During a particularly [[IRC (23 July 2009)|disturbing chat]], he ([[:File:BillRiley.jpg|incognito]]) suggested that the trolls try to convince him to rape [[Rocky Shoemaker]]. He also evidently saw no issue with rape by fraud (essentially having sex with someone while tricking them into believing you're somebody else, meaning they didn't consent with you) as seen with his comic book counterpart when he travels forwards in time to have sex with his future wife [[Lovely Weather]] in the guise of being his future self [[Transgender|(whom is definitely a different person in the future)]]. During the [[Kacey Calls]], he attempted unsuccessfully to lure her to his place in the guise of being [[Liquid Chris]], again seeing absolutely nothing wrong with that.

In all likelihood, though, these parts of his behavior are most likely explained by the keys to understanding his behavior overall: his ignorance about the world and his persecution complex causes him to be quite [[naïve]] about how bad rape actually is. With the Rocky situation above, he likely said that as part of an odd, roundabout scheme to get the trolls arrested, but it's still pretty fucked up that he'd even suggest something like this, let alone tell her about it after.

In one of the [[Kacey Calls]], Chris states he believes that abortion in cases of rape should be the choice of the victim, and that they should not be pressured by others in their decision.

Despite joking about how uncomfortably close he was to his own mother, few actually believed that Chris had it in him to commit an act of rape. For instance, he tried to kiss [[Emily]] and gave up when she said no,<ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#A precious farewell (1:29:35–1:31:10)]]</ref> showing that he does understand the importance of consent... Or at least, he ''used'' to. Unfortunately, it seems that as of 2014, he has decided that he won't take "no" for an answer, and basically ''molested'' [[Catherine#The Date|Catherine during their second outing]] by hugging her and burying his head in her breasts even after she flatly told him not to. This gets even more disturbing when you consider [[Catherine E-mails#It IS Your Fault!|this e-mail]], where Chris outright says that he's [[Chris and his Ego|"entitled to a relationship"]]. Also not helping matters was Chris kissing multiple guests who posed with him at the [[TooManyGames]] convention regardless of consent, which ultimately got him kicked out.

Furthermore, it was argued that Chris didn't have a history of violence conducive to attempting sexual assault. Aside from his [[Death threats#Likelihood of Acting Out on Death Threats|habit of dishing out threats he can't possibly carry out]], [[28 October 2011|hitting Michael Snyder with a car]], and [[26 December 2014|macing a manager in the chest]], Chris is physically [[Chris and health|very weak and unfit]], and simply could not overpower an able-bodied person – the only outcome of him attempting it would be a swift knee to the [[duck]] followed by a rousing round of [[Kick the Autistic|America's favorite game]]. However, given Catherine's experience with Chris during their outing (in her words, she was taken by surprise and couldn't react to it), it was encouraged that women should exercise caution around him.

Interestingly, Chris details in [[Announcement 06292016]] that he wants all men to stay an arm's length distance away from him. Along with showing the insecurities he possesses concerning men, Chris seems to think that he is [[Chris and his ego|an attractive enough]] [[Transgender|transwoman]] for [[Jacob Sockness|a man]] to consider raping him.

==See also==
* [[Affair with Mother]]
* [[China]]
* [[Chris and his ego]]
* [[Chris and sexuality]]
* [[Chris Sex Logs]]
* [[Duck]]
* [[Homos]]
* [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases]]
* [[Mass debating]]
* [[Naive]]
* [[Pickle]]
* [[Biology#Reproductive biology|Reproductive Biology]]
* [[Semen]]
* [[ShecameforCWC.JPG]]
* [[Women's rights]]

== References ==
<references/>
{{articleofthenow}}
{{Love quest}}
{{Chris and}}
[[Category:Concepts influenced by Idea Guy]]

Chris and sex

2025-06-08T01:04:51Z

Anemichu: /* Chris in the act */

{{Honest}}
{{HealthDisclosure}}
{{Incomplete|Information regaring Chris' sexual frustration, and how he copes with it}}
[[Christian Weston Chandler|Chris]] has a warped view of '''sexual intercourse''' (a.k.a. '''hanky-panky''' and '''romps in the hay'''<ref>Chris has used this phrase since approximately [[2018]], including in [[:File:SchuComic12-9Page29.JPG|Sonichu #12-9]], on his [[July 2018 social media posts#BronyCon thoughts|polyamorous marriage]] and on his [[Incest fallout chat leaks#Chris texts about incest with his mother|incest with his mother]].</ref>), mostly stemming from stunted sexual development, [[Borb|a sheltered upbringing]], and the [[Autism|twisted, disjointed]] [[Chris and reality|worldview]] he acquired as a result. He first developed an understanding of sex from watching softcore porn on HBO at around age 16. He describes pornographic films as "educational".<ref>[[Miyamoto Saga#Chris Sets the Record STRAIGHT]]</ref>

==Knowledge of sex==
In his mind, Chris has mastered all there is to know about sex, and now regards himself as a bit of a guru. He has said that kissing a woman is "magical and delightful... sweet and melting like ice cream or chocolate", a description he [[Things Chris has ripped off|stole]] from ''[[Sailor Moon]]''.<ref>[[Mailbag 18#He might as well be talking about how to pilot the space shuttle|Mailbag 18]]</ref> In truth, for much of the time he was presenting this advice Chris had yet to even kiss a girl.<ref name="Jackie E-mails 2">[[Jackie E-mails 2]]</ref>

What he knows about sex he's picked up from rudimentary [[high school]] [[Dating education|sex education]] or [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases|pornography]]. This has engendered many false beliefs in Chris, which he sticks to religiously. Readers who brave his [[Chris Sex Logs|sex chat logs]] should immediately notice what's going wrong – Chris's fantasies are merely recreations of what he's seen in pornos, rather than plausible sexual experiences. For example, he believed that [[Kacey]] would welcome a brutal tit-fucking followed by load after load of [[navy]] to the face.<ref>[[Kacey Phone Call]]</ref>

Other examples of Chris's crude misconceptions about sex abound. He mimics female porn stars' sex positions, spreads an imaginary vagina a yard across,<ref name="JR Eyes">[[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV]]</ref> thinks that the clitoris is located on the female body where the [[wikipedia:Perineum|perineum]] is located on the male one<ref>[[September 2014 Facebook Posts#Introducing the Un-clit]]</ref> and believes that electric shocks to the vagina are pleasurable.<ref name="Cums cat">[[CWC Cums for a Cat]]</ref> He also seems to believe that a woman's vagina is higher up on the woman's body that it actually is;<ref>[[:File:SchuComicSP3P7.jpg]]</ref> this is undoubtedly due to his experience with his [[Kimmi|sex]] [[Officer Nasty|dolls]]. The "missionary cowgirl" position mentioned in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]] is a contradiction in terms. He can't even get the most basic double entendres correct, wearing a terrible [[CWC Cola|Mountain Dew]] parody shirt thinking it's an invitation for women to try and ride his broken [[penis]].<ref name="JR Eyes" /> He thinks that his [[Virgin with rage|virginity]] is a precious and sought-after treasure which women will come in droves to take (he even went so far as to use it as a bargaining chip to haggle with a prostitute), and believes that [[mass debating]] ultimately makes him better at sex.

With Chris's [[Chris and English|slippery grip on language]], he is also noticeably confused about basic sexual terminology. For example, Chris told Ivy he had a "sticky dream" about her. When Ivy asked if he meant a wet dream, he replied, "No, that's when you pee yourself, silly!"<ref>[[Ivy Q&A#Threats]]</ref> While he may have the best of intentions, his word choices unwittingly present him in a very bad light. He refuses to use common terms – either medical or slang – for sex organs, instead calling penises "[[duck]]s" and "[[pickle]]s", and vaginas and vulvae "[[china]]" or "tom-tom" out of a childish aversion borne of disgust.

In [[August 2011]], Chris said he is into female domination.<ref>[[Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya]]</ref> (going as far as to draw Sonichu and Rosechu performing the act in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]]).

===Reproductive Biology===
{{Main|Biology#Reproductive biology}}
[[File:Female anatomy according to chris.png|thumb|A moderately detailed portrait of what Chris probably thought females looked like before meeting [[Mia Hamm]].]]

Chris's understanding on reproductive biology had primarily come from what he had seen in porn.

===Books on the Subject===

Chris had obtained a copy of the book [[Ultimate Guide to Sex and Disability]], which he had told [[Null]] about on 5 July 2021. As a result of reading this book, Chris came to believe that he could mentor people about dating and sex. Chris had especially shown this in conversations he had with [[Fiona]], where he attempts to advise her on how to approach a potential lover when she goes off to college.<ref>[[Fiona DMs#Dating Advice]]</ref> Chris had seemed to twist or misunderstand many of the passages found in this book, taking it to be a book on how to perform sex on disabled people, rather than one ''for'' disabled people.

==Moral Basis==

{{Dated}}

===Straightness===

{{main|Chris and sexuality}}

Chris's stance on sexual orientations have always been iffy at best. Prior to his transition to a Tomgirl, he has shown a fear of losing his straightness. This obsessive demand for people to "STAY STRAIGHT" has been one of the first noted and exploited aspects of Chris since his discovery. Many trolls had jokingly declared this as an indicator of him repressing his sexuality in some fashion, only for it to end up being the case in the long run.

===Religion===
[[Image:DatingEducation.jpg|thumb|250px|69ing? Intercourse? ''Really''? In a ''children's'' comic? Because they should know all about this stuff.]]
{{quote|You have heard that it was said by them of old time, You shall not commit adultery: but I say to you, that whosoever looks on a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart.|Matthew 5:27-28}}

Sex was at one point viewed, through Chris's eyes, by the Bible – or rather, by his religion, as Chris's Biblical knowledge is extremely poor. Chris was very strict on keeping to the word of God when male homosexuality is the topic, vehemently stating that he ''hates'' homos, but with no hesitation views lesbian porn and approves of it [[Mass debating|masturbatorily]]<ref>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref>, and as of 2014, seemed to be adopting a more progressive view of even gay men and their rights (albeit begrudgingly). In 2015 Chris made a video lamenting his "past" homophobia and clarifying that he apparently now has great liking and admiration for male homosexuality, [[Retroactive continuity|retconning]] the viscous homophobic tirade of [[Sonichu 10]] into a bizarre zombie apocalypse, implying that he realizes religion is not an excuse for discrimination. Another violation of his Christian morals is the fact that he planned on losing his virginity on the [[Third date|third or fourth date]] with his true sweetheart (read: first girl who will last three dates with Chris). This is, of course, blatant violation of the Christian value of marriage before sex.

The Bible also frowns upon [[Nudes|pornographers]], of which he is very guilty and holds no apparent [[Chris and remorse|remorse]]. These double standards cause many trolls to despise him, seeing as he selectively chooses what to denigrate and what is OK in his own personal dogma, although to be somewhat fair, he's far from the only follower of the Christian faith to do so.

Despite people pointing out these contradictions, even quoting passages of the Bible, he will deny it. This is most likely because he goes to [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|a very liberal church]], so any question about premarital sex is probably interpreted quite liberally, and Chris believes that his church and ''only'' his church defines the entirety of religious morality - as it applies to him, anyway. When Chris asks Rocky about passages quoted to him by [[trolls]], she only fuels his à la carte Christianity by saying things like sex before marriage is okay as long as the couple is in love, which contradicts Christian doctrine.<ref>[[Mumble 8]]</ref> In summary, Chris picked and chose what parts of Christian doctrine suit his own prejudices, and disregards the ones that would interfere with his [[Love Quest]].

===Sexism===

Chris seems to consider a female sexual partner as a rubber stamp over his (alleged) sexual orientation. Flying in the face of any moral system he's ever held, he announced his desire to upload on the Internet a video of his first full sexual intercourse, even if his hypothetical partner refused to consent to it.<ref>[[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence#The Introduction Image Space is NOT Ad Space (CCS)]]</ref> After further prodding, he added that he would simply hide the camera, record the event without her consent and blur her face before making the video public.<ref>[[Mailbag 31#In which Chris crosses yet another line]]</ref> In [[CCWC's Final Warning to the Second CWC]], Chris indicated that if a woman accused him of being gay in person, he would sexually assault them by demanding they submit to a kiss and allow him to videotape the act, possibly as a way of proving his straightness.

For Chris, as stated above, [[Women's rights|a woman is just a living, sentient sex-toy]], existing only to validate him as a heterosexual. As long as they're straight and younger than him, of course.

==Chris in the act==
[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|frame|right|Christian [[For Julie's Eyes Only|professing his love]] for "[[BlueSpike|Julie]]".]]
Leaked tapes of Chris's audio sex with [[Julie]], and the infamous sex tape with Kimmi shed light on Chris as he acts out on his fantasies. In particular, the sex tape shows how Chris assumes ''female'' positions, notably riding on top of Kimmi in a scene straight out of a porno. It seems that Chris's entirety of knowledge about sexual relationships stems from ignoring the [[JERKS|men]] in pornography (due to fear of becoming a [[homo]]).

However, it should be noted that in most of Chris's Rule 34 drawings the characters do tend to assume positions which are fitting for their gender, including Chris.<ref>For examples, see the [[Sonichu 8#The uncensored scenes|uncensored panels]] from Sonichu 8, [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack]], [[CWCRockin4Way.jpg]], the [[Giant Penis Comic]] and [[Jackie E-mails 14]].</ref> It might be that Chris adopts female positions not so much due to ignorance regarding sex, but more because of [[Tomgirl pictures|his identification with the opposite gender]].

Chris's view of cunnilingus, put on display in [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV]], involves slobbering all over a woman's vagina. Despite all his knowledge of porn, he fails to see how cunnilingus is more than just slobbering, but proper tongue action to stimulate the clitoris.

In the leaked media, Chris displays that he may have some issues with delayed orgasm. This can either be physiological (bent duck, [[Obesity|being overweight]], lack of endurance) or psychological in nature (performance anxiety, high expectations, intrusive homoerotic thoughts, subconscious guilt about sex), or a combination thereof.

In the 2018 [[All Star]] video, Chris is seen tugging his [[duck]] along to the song. He remains flaccid the entire time; his inability to get an erection is possibly a side effect of [[Transgender|HRT]]. If this is true, Chris will certainly not be getting any hanky-panky in the future.

During his time losing his virginity to a [[Mia Hamm| prostitute]] its worth noting that he first received a blowjob, then demanded cowgirl before possible missionary later; [[Obesity| but luckily for her]] he couldn't last very long and finished just after she rid him for a bit; this is important as it points to 2 big problems with Chris; first his lack of self control due to him [[Navy| finishing]] so quickly, second is that he ordered possibly the laziest sex position in the book, with Mia doing pretty much all of the physical exercise with Chris being a lazy fuck.

Chris's second sexual partner in his life was none other than his own [[Barb|mom]], the exact details of the [[Affair with Mother|incestuous affair]] are a bit vague but needless to say every act described by Chris is extremely disturbing and not for the faint of heart.

===Contraceptives===

{{quote|Confidentially, I wear a condom during the second half when I masturbate; I use Trojan or LIfestyles brand (Trojan mostly)

And I used condoms when I fooled with the [[Officer Nasty|L.D.s]] as well.|Chris, [[Jackie E-mails 1]]}}

Condoms, or as Chris has called them "'''raincoats'''", are thin latex coverings worn over a man's penis for the purpose of birth control. However, Chris seemed to understand the condom as more of a symbol for promoting safe premarital sex rather than as a contraceptive. Aside from promoting safe sex and justifying premarital sex, Chris has also drawn his male Sonichu characters with condoms in order to censor their penises. Chris has stated that before his third date with [[Blanca]], he'd wear a condom for the first two times they've had sex, only to have non-protected sex by the third date, showing that he also believed that condoms serve more as some kind of gateway to pregnancy. Chris had a box of chocolate-flavored condoms that he purchased to be prepared for his first time. Chris had given a few different dates for when they expired; some time in 2010 <ref>[[Chris Sex Logs#Condoms]]</ref> and January 2013.<ref>[[IRC (27 December 2008)]]</ref>

Chris reportedly also wore a condom that was flavored like green apple while engaging in sex with Mia Hamm.<ref>[[July 2020 social media posts]]</ref> It's not entirely clear whether the condom was entirely successful or not due to him mentioning that a "Smidge" of Navy had leaked out after their first round together, meaning he either kept them in his pocket far too long, the condom didn't fit entirely properly around his [[Duck]], he became flaccid way faster than he should have, or he's an idiot who mistook a smear of lube or vaginal discharge for semen; knowing Chris any of these [[Chris and negligence| explanations]] [[Duck| are]] [[Health| equally]] [[Slow in the minds| possible]]. For those wondering however, it's probably safe to assume [[Mia Hamm]] won't be harboring [[Crystal]] any time soon; even by some non-existent chance he managed to get her pregnant, she would have likely been on the pill anyway.

Chris would later reveal to [[Null]] that he was using a condom while having sex with his "over 50 girlfriend", who was later discovered to be [[Barb]]. While ploughing a woman like Barb would cause anyone to instinctively wear the thickest condom available, then get themselves tested a few times over just in case (all of which Chris did); realistically there wasn't much reason to do so since the risk of STD and pregnancy was non-existent since both were [[Health|(at least where STIs were concerned)]] clean and both were completely infertile.

== Sexual Frustration ==

Chris has had a yearning to have a girl to have sex with since the start of his [[Love Quest]] in 2003. The first manifestation of this was when he was clawing at [[Megan]] where his pining for her went ignored or denied as any sane person would.

Throughout the first half of [[2021]], Chris' search for a sweetheart had resumed. Chris has expressed great sexual frustration, yearning for a physical girl to have sex with over his [[polyamorous marriage|ficticious sweethearts]]. According to [[Kyle]], at some point in [[February 2021]] Chris expressed interest in wanting to get a hooker,<ref name=feb21hooker>[[The Place chats (March 2021)#Chris wanted a hooker]]</ref> something which Chris was once not in favor of.

In [[March 2021]], following a masturbation session, Chris had a conversation with the [[Watchmen]], in which he discussed how, despite not disliking or disapproving of the act of masturbation, he felt that he was [[Gender dysphoria|born the wrong gender]].<ref>[[Masturbation discussions#16 March 2021]]</ref> In a [[May 2021]] conversation, he claimed that over the years, he would continually consume pornography and masturbate to get "the hard-on". He expressed how until recently, he felt that he had not fully explored his sexuality, nor any other means to stimulate himself, and even then claims to still overthink the process of [[List of things Chris has shoved up his ass|inserting a dildo or vibrator up his ass]]. <ref>[[Masturbation discussions#18 May 2021]]</ref>

==Means of Coping with Sexual Frustration==

=== Masturbation and Porn Consumption ===

{{Main|Mass debating}}

Chris has had a history of masturbating, starting when he discovered he could stimulate his penis by rubbing it against a washcloth when he was 15. In 2009, he made use of a washbasin in the kitchen of his house while performing the act, and had claimed in the [[Ivy Q&A]] that he made use of a pillow that he'd fold in half, treating it as a mastrubation tool. Since then, masturbation has been an outlet for Chris's sexual frustration.

In a [[February 2021]] conversion with [[The Watchmen]], Chris said "Masturbation takes Fifteen LONG, Tiring and Annoying Minutes, with my body, regardless of whatever method or tool utilized. And it has literally been that long in unenjoyable time since I first rubbed one out while my body was 15. And that was Looooong before I ever started on HRT in 2016. So, not only is masturbation out of the question, it's more misery-inducing."<ref>[[Masturbation discussions#27 February 2021]]</ref>

=== Drawing Porn ===

{{quote|As for the drawing itself, I've realized that it was done not only out of inspired fantasy, angst against E.D., and love for you, but also a major release for my crazy, mixed-up hormones. If I didn't have the foresight to put my pent-up frustrations and feelings in the form of something, I might have become an abusive maniac, so thank god for allowing me to release my bottled up frustrations in a more positive, yet not so "Politically Correct", and not physically hurting others, method.|Chris on how he might have approached Megan had he not drawn [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]]<ref>[[Megan Emails, 2008#Chris continues bothering her about ED]]</ref>}}

Chris has on more than one ocassion drawn pornography of his own in order to release sexual tension. Chris claimed to [[Megan Schroeder]] that he had in part created the controversial drawing [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]] because he felt that doing so would inhibit him from sexually advancing on Megan, as he had feelings for her, and would have become an "abusive maniac" had he not created the drawing. The fact that Chris had decided to use what was essentially a product of his own pent-up sexual frustration as a means of attempting to get his Encyclopedia Dramatica page down only seemed to leave a much more bitter taste in Megan's mouth after announcing this.

During the period when Chris became much more sexually frustrated in 2021, he displayed this more openly towards friends, and even on his social media. He sent a picture of his Chris Chan Sonichu persona wearing a [[negligee]] while giving a seductive look to [[The WCT]], and talked to him about how arousing it is to wear one.

=== Sex Toys ===

Chris has made [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases|numberable purchases]] for sex toys, porn DVDs and inflatable sex dolls.

=== Relationships with OCs ===

For a time, partly due to influence from the [[Idea Guys]], Chris has temporarily given up on his search for a sweetheart in pursuit for being in relationships with fictional characters instead.

=== Wet Dreams ===

Chris has also had his share of wet [[dreams]], particularly whenever he had held strong feelings for his flavor of the week. The first of these wet dreams was of [[PandaHalo]], where he dreamed about the both of them getting naked, having sex, and then Chris finally climaxing. Chris also had a dream where he was in a labyrinth filled with water, where he met a woman and had sex with her, Chris recreated the dream in a Flipnote animation. The strangest of these was of one where Chris claims that he "almost had sex" with the Sonic character Sally Acorn, which had left him sexually frustrated afterwards. Chris talks about another wet dream he had two months later, this time of the ''Sonic X'' character Chris Thorndyke aged-up and "handsome". Chris also expresses the sexual frustration he felt after waking up from this dream too.<ref>[[MKR DMs]]</ref>

=== Sex with Mother ===

It had long been joked and speculated by trolls, christorians, and observers alike that Chris has much more intimate feelings with [[Barbara Chandler|his mother]] than he let on. These speculations were confirmed in July of 2021 when screenshots were leaked of Chris detailing to Isabella Loretta Janke his incestuous exploits. Null later revealed worrying conversations he had previously with Chris about a new "over 50's" girlfriend he had been using condoms with. We will leave it to you to put 2 and 2 together.

==Sexual Deviance==

Chris's skewed basis of his understanding of sex leads him to exhibiting several instances of sexual deviance.

===Inappropriate Interactions with Women===

To say the least, Chris's social interactions hinder his ability to understand sex etiquette.

===Pedophilia and Age Disparity===
{{main|Pedofork}}
{{Wise|he is a pedophile.}}

Pedophilia has always been a touchy subject in regards to Chris. Chris had at first attempted to deny all claims that he was a pedophile, even creating a new word, "pedofork", as a sort of comeback to those who referred to him as such, apparently being created solely to make the word rhyme in "I'm not a pedofork, you dorks". Chris has tried to retain this image by removing any references that may be interpreted as him being a pedophile in his Sonichu comics. Most infamously, Chris had characters in [[Sonichu 8]] make comments about "dumb laws" when [[Zapina Rosechu]], who is 14 years old, asks to participate in stripping for Women's Rights.

At a glance, Chris seems to adhere to the age of consent, once advertising on his [[Attraction Sign|Attraction Signs]] that he would only date someone of legal age. Chris however does not seem to understand or care about how creepy it is for him to be attracted to women that are half his age, and seems to see it as yet another barrier for his Love Quest. Chris has cat-called an artist whom he believed to be "entering young adulthood", has made sexual remarks towards [[Bella]]; despite her having no interest in Chris, and has shown arousal when [[Fiona]] exposed herself to him.

===Necrophillia===

While Chris himself has never engaged in sex with a dead body to the best of anyone's knowledge, Chris has [[Jail Letter - 29 July 2022|recently]] been referring to barb as a zombie like husk since even before they began engaging in [[Affair with Mother|their affair]] and that her soul has already moved on to her rosechu form in C-197; complaining that her lifeless body was still clinging to life and preventing him from going back home. Meaning that Chris is at least partially comfortable with the idea of having sex with his dead mother.

In another disturbing incident, Chris recorded [[It's not that cold]], where he proceeds to imitate {{w|Buffalo Bill (character)|Buffalo Bill}} and pretends to get inside his dead dog [[Patti Chandler|Patti]]. While not engaging in sex with her, he does take a bizarre sexual pleasure in wearing her corpse (or at least pretending to do so, since he was too lazy to actually dig her up).

===Bestiality===
{{quote|I can imagine myself doing it with a [[Patti-chan|collie]] at least. you know, like Lassie.|Chris to [[PandaHalo]]<ref name="collie">[[IRC (27 December 2008)]]</ref>}}
[[File:PattiLuv.jpg|thumb|Run, Patti, run!]]
[[File:Super-mode.jpg|thumb|left|90px|Chris, sporting a [[ECV 00002‎|homemade fursuit]].]]

In [[December 2008]], Chris told [[PandaHalo]] he would be willing to have sex with a female dog for her.<ref name="collie" /> However, in his [[Chris-chan Discusses...‎|interview with ScrewAttackEurope]], Chris says he's against bestiality, then hoists himself by his own petard by claiming that Sonichu & co. are not "half-humans" but "all-animals" with human form; so technically this isn't bestiality, as they're animals having sex with each other.

Chris suggested that Brian from ''[[Family Guy]]'' be paired up with "any sexy breed" of dog.<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20161007175309/http://archive.sonichu.com:80/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Family_Guy The Family Guy article on CWCipedia]</ref>

In [[The Red-Maned Deer]], Chris recites a poem he wrote about having sex with a deer, but at the end of it states, "This was, in fact, NOT an act of bestiality. For you see, the Red-Maned Deer I have been communicating with and tracking, is really...my lo-my womanly sweetheart, named [[Jacklyn Romy]]."<ref>[[The Red-Maned Deer]]</ref> The fact that the deer is Jackie is obvious, but in spite of this he explicitly stated that it was her at the end.

In a photo of the [[Rental House]] from June 2014, the Chandler minivan bears a bumper sticker reading "I Sleep with Dogs".<ref>[[:File:Chandler Cars 1600w.jpg]]</ref> What exactly this means is yet to be determined.

====Is Chris a furry?====
{{Wise|he is a furry.}}

{{quote|I am half-Sonichu and half-Pokemon, thus making me a "furry".|Chris, May 2018, during the aftermath of the [[Idea Guys]] saga.<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20220209025754/https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/997320832040005634</ref>}}

Whether Chris could actually be considered a furry was debated for a long time.<ref>From [[Sarah May Skype Logs#Chris tries to leave|the Sarah May Skype Logs]]: [7:17:25] '''Sarah May''': Did you feel sexually aroused when you drew them? [7:17:34] '''Christopher C.W.C.''': a bit.</ref> There are some things that point in that direction. Chris certainly gets aroused by provocative drawings of anthropomorphic animals (at least when they are [[Sonic]] characters), and he has drawn unsolicited porn of his own Sonic recolors. [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]] is in many ways similar to a fursona, and Chris even role-played the character while cybering with [[Julie]].<ref name="Cums cat" /> Finally, in the [[Giant Penis Comic]], Chris and [[Ivy]] both transform into anthropomorphic animals during the act of sex. On the other hand, [[Mimms]] and [[Lucas]] noted that Chris was prejudiced against a male furry who patronized [[The GAMe PLACe]] because he happened to be [[gay]].<ref>[[Mimms and Lucas Q&A#Racism and homophobia]]</ref> Given the high proportion of gay and bisexual men in the furry fandom, Classic Chris would almost certainly have been uncomfortable at any kind of furry gathering.

In [[May 2018]], under the influence of the [[Idea Guys]], Chris declared himself a furry.<ref>[[May_2018_social_media_posts#Michael_Hirtes_BTFO]]</ref> The Idea Guys also [[brainwashed]] him into believing he is in a [[polyamorous marriage]] with his anthropomorphic [[imaginary friends]] [[Magi-Chan]] and [[Cryzel]], and Chris believes he has had sexual relations with these imaginary friends.<ref>[[July 2018 social media posts#BronyCon thoughts]]</ref>

Also of note is that in [[July 2020|mid-2020]], he binge-watched the [[Netflix]] anime ''BNA: Brand New Animal'', commenting it was "very good" but said nothing further than that.<ref>[[July_2020_social_media_posts#Animu]]</ref>

While Chris may loosely qualify as a furry due to his obsession with anthropomorphic [[Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]] and [[My Little Pony|ponies]], he has never shown an interest in the broader furry community.

===Oedipus Complex===
In simple terms, it is the attachment of the child to the parent of the opposite sex, accompanied by envious and aggressive feelings toward the parent of the same sex.<ref> https://www.uvm.edu/~jbailly/courses/tragedy/student%20second%20documents/Oedipus%20Complex.html#:~:text=Definition,parent%20of%20the%20same%20sex.</ref> Chris has exuded such an Oedipus Complex for years given his feelings for his mother coddling him while also showing resentment for Bob now and then, especially whenever he’d scold Chris for his antics.
See below for more details:
* [[Affair with Mother]]
* [[Chris_and_sex#Sex_with_Mother|Sex with Mother]]
* [[Chris_and_sex#Dreams_of_sex_with_Barb|Dreams of sex with Barb]]
* [[Chris_and_sex#Actual_sex_with_Barb|Actual sex with Barb]]

{{-}}

==Prostitution==
[[Image:Virginbreaker.png|thumb|Chris's leaked [[Facebook]] announcement that he had lost his virginity. Initially igniting a firestorm of controversy, Chris himself let it slip that she was found "somewhere on the backpage" soon after.]]

Given how badly Chris wanted to lose his virginity, many observers have wondered why he didn't immediately spend some of his [[tugboat]] on a prostitute. [[Mumble 4]], from [[February 2009]], answered that question for a while. There, Chris explained that paying for sex would render the act "meaningless," and he was – in a rare display of common sense – afraid of contracting a sexually transmitted disease.

Needs must as the devil drives, though. While being blackmailed by [[Jack Thaddeus]] in the summer of [[2009]], Chris attempted to solicit the services of a [[Craigslist]] prostitute to fuck on camera so he could recover his hacked [[PlayStation Network]] accounts. After describing his personal problems to the prostitute, she hung up on him. Chris was apparently trying to get free sex from the hooker with long, rambling stories about his horrible life to try and gain sympathy. He was genuinely shocked when she didn't offer to fuck him out of pity, unaware that prostitutes, by definition, only have sex with men for money.

Previously, in [[March 2009]], [[Bryan Bash]] had sent a trio of prostitutes to [[14 Branchland Court|Chris's house]] so he would no longer be a virgin with rage. [[Hooker incident|Hilarity ensued]].

By the beginning of [[2010]], Chris's views on prostitution had further softened. According to his [[Vivian Gee E-mails 2|conversations with Vivian Gee]], around the turn of the year he was attempting to save $100 out of his monthly budget to buy himself a whore for his 28th [[birthday]]. This, presumably, was the "hundred dollars for a damn hooker" he referred to when [["Damian Antaria", PLEASE, Don't Leave Me - I NEED YOU!!!|begging the Wallflower for sex]] on YouTube in [[March 2010]].

Between [[April 2010|April]] and [[July 2010]], under the name of [[Carlos Chantor]], Chris tried to offer himself up as a male escort. He described himself as "[[Chris and reality|Experienced for Her Pleasure]]", with an [[obesity|average]] body type.<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 6]]</ref>

Later, under the guise of his troll persona [[JenkinsJinkies]], Chris attempted to acquire the contact details of the hookers Brian Bash had previously hired. While it is possible that Chris merely wished to make his disguise more convincing by implying that 14 year old Jenkins wished to hire prostitutes, it seems far more likely that Chris actually was considering hiring Brian's girls.

In [[April 2012]] a [[Facebook]] status leaked in which Chris announced that he was no longer a virgin. Suspicion arose that this was due to the help of a hooker. Chris provided further evidence suggesting that [[Mia Hamm|the girl]] was a prostitute on 1 [[May 2012|May]] when he wrote in a [[Facebook#Hey, Trollies|Facebook note]] that his virgin breaker can be found "somewhere on the [[Wikipedia:Backpage|backpage]]", a website known for featuring sex service ads.<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20210206132219/https://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/19/opinion/kristof-not-quite-a-teen-yet-sold-for-sex.html?_r=1]</ref> On 28/29 June 2014 Chris openly admitted that his first time was with a prostitute, and that he had sex with her twice.<ref>[[Other documents#Chris's wingman]]</ref>

In [[June 2016]], Chris himself made [[Women Only Need Apply - No STD's|another attempt]] to enter the prostitution business, now as a [[Tomgirl|trans woman]], going by the name "Stephanie Bustcakes". Predictably, Chris was unable to find any "women of any orientation" who were interested in paying him $100 to have sex either "one way or the lesbian way", and the Stephanie Bustcakes persona has not yet reappeared.

[[File:ChrisChanSexForMoney.png|thumb|200px]]
On 24 April 2018, while under the influence of the [[Idea Guys]], who had allegedly been extorting him out of thousands of dollars, Chris announced:<ref>[[April 2018 social media posts#Will provide house tour and suck dicks for money]]</ref>

{{quotebox|Anyone living locally to me in Virginia, or visiting in Charlottesville, I’ll give y’all BJs for money too. Serious.}}

A fan on Twitter messaged him about it. In their conversation, Chris said:<ref name=price>[[:File:NAME YOUR PRICE!!.jpeg]]</ref>

{{quotebox|Consider me a beginner with experience blowing [[Cryzel and Magi-Chan|my loving boyfriend]], willing to learn and adapt further. $50 for that BJ from this celeb; if he wants butt sex, that will be $100. Cash only.}}

Chris told [[CWCProtectSquad]] member Tings Tingz that he was indeed serious about prostituting himself, had several offers, but had not taken on any customers. When asked if he would consider, Chris responded, "a little from Column 'A' and the latter from Column 'B'".<ref>[[Tings Tingz DMs#Prostitution post]]</ref>

After the [[Guard Dogs]] rescued Chris from the Idea Guys' influence, he reversed course and disavowed the prostitution messages on 7 May 2018, saying he had been coerced.<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20191107173201/https://twitter.com/cwcsonichu/status/993693423084318720</ref> He went further on 25 May, saying he had been forced to write such things, and implied the Idea Guys had been behind it.<ref>[[May 2018 social media posts#Calling out the Idea Guys]]</ref>

According to [[Kyle]], in [[February 2021]], Chris wanted a hooker and asked Kyle to ask [[Null]] to get him one.<ref name=feb21hooker></ref>

==Incest==
{{See also|Affair with Mother}}
{{Split Off}}
{{Quote|I, myself, Did have dreams of having sex with [[Barbara Chandler|my mother]].|Chris, 2016}}

[[File:CWCSonichu Rule34.jpeg|thumb|Chris having sex with his "son," Sonichu, in order to fulfill a prophecy to bring Crystal into the world.]]

Chris has long been suspected of having unnatural feelings about [[sex]] and family.

In [[2007]], Chris attempted to shock [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] into submission by posting his own [[Rule 34]] drawings, including one of himself [[Shecameforcwc.jpg|fingerbanging a nude brunette woman]]. ED users immediately concluded this was Crystal, Chris's imaginary twin sister in the comics. This charge infuriated Chris and therefore became the conventional wisdom. By the time Chris successfully convinced anyone that it was really [[Megan Schroeder]] in the drawing, the notion that Chris wants to bang his imaginary twin sister had already stuck.

[[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|Crystal]], Chris's imaginary twin sister, appeared as a [[:image:153-GirlfriendsGift.jpg|"girlfriend" card]] he made for ''[[Yu-Gi-Oh!]]'', and her attractiveness and desirability are brought up several times in the [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'']] comics well after being established as Chris's twin. Chris has shown complete ignorance in matters incestuous before; his [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]] are all related (despite their type and appearance differences, they all come from [[homos|Sonic and the same male Pikachu]] – apart from that fact, they were all created by Chris and acknowledge him as such – Sonichu and Rosechu calling him father), but many of them are paired off with one another (notably Sonichu/Rosechu, Bubbles/Blake, and Magi/Silvana – Simonla was technically made by someone else), banging and some even [[Sonichu and Rosechu's children|having]] [[Sandy Rosechu|kids]]. Chris's own comic children are a form of incest – as Chris impregnated himself with his navy. Chris shrugs off [[Autism|all medical/science facts]] and lists the two as perfectly healthy and Autism Free.

Chris first expounded his views on incest to the internet on 31 [[January 2009]] during the [[Mumble 1|first Mumble chat]], when it was revealed that he did not fully understood the meaning of the word "incest". While he showed aversion toward incest in the chat, his condemnation of it was lukewarm, saying that he would only "definitely discourage that" and that lesbian incest is "possibly OK" due to no reproduction being involved. Compare this to his statements about male homosexuality from the same chat ("I hate homo males [...] I'd sooner have a [[Tomgirl Saga|sex change]] before I would ever turn into a homo") or to his statements about male homosexuality from earlier that month, saying that he would make it a crime and force its practitioners into having sex with members of the opposite gender.<ref>[[IRC (02 January 2009)]]</ref>

A year later, Chris's views became staunch. When a correspondent in the [[Mailbag]] pointed out that Chris's state allows cousin marriage but not same-sex marriage, Chris furiously denied it and wrote, "Cousin-Marriage is just as Terrible and Unholy as MARRYING YOUR OWN MOTHER OR FATHER!"<ref>[[Common Questions#5 January 2010]]</ref> When another correspondent responded to Chris by saying that he is happily married to his cousin and that their marriage is indeed legal in Virginia, Chris answered him by saying he was destined to hell for his relationship,<ref>[[Mailbag 34#Good luck in hell]]</ref> not realizing that incest is shown in a positive light in [[Chris and religion|the Bible]]. When the subject came up again in the next mailbag, Chris said that sexual relations between cousins are just as wrong as incest between parents and their children or between siblings, and that all those relationships were condemned in the "same part" of the Bible,<ref>[[Mailbag 35#I think he wanted a specific verse]]</ref> which is not actually true.<ref> [https://web.archive.org/web/20051223102404/http://www.cousincouples.com/?page=religion]</ref>

===Incest fics===
In [[February 2010]], Chris notably did not react to [[:File:Fkinglie.png|an extremely NSFW ad of himself]] on the [[CWCipedia]] depicting himself fingering Barb [[SheCameForCWC.jpg|like he did with a former friend in a certain illustration]], despite reacting to [[I am Alive|an ad claiming that he was dead]].

During the [[Idea Guy]] saga, the troll convinced Chris that [[Magi-Chan]] foretold of a prophecy in which [[Crystal]] would be born by Chris mating with Sonichu. He also informed Chris that if this was drawn, he wouldn't have to do it in real life. Chris complied<ref>https://archive.md/AL1PT</ref>. During the nonsensical [[Sonichu 13| issue 13]] of Sonichu incest is unsurprisingly everywhere, from [[Chris Chan Sonichu]] getting married to [[Magichan]] to Chris and Sonichu raping each other.

To the [[Watchmen]], Chris chatted about how he was upset over implications of incest in the ''Sonichu'' family, stating that he had written a piece to dispute the "ugh, Incest bullshit."<ref>[[Chats leaked by MKRs Bloody Chunks#Ugh, Incest]]</ref>

In a Facebook post from [[January 2020]], Chris reiterated his opposition to incest, writing "I, personally, seriously disapprove of incest and would never practice it at all" and "The Bottom Line is: Incest is Never 'Wincest' (Epic UGH!)".<ref>[[January 2020 social media posts#Incest is not wincest]]</ref>

In [[November 2023]], Chris replied to a [[Twitter]] post that asked him if he could list examples of what he meant by "strange ideas and dreams." Chris stated that he strongly disapproves of incest fan fictions involving himself and characters like [[Sonichu]] Prime and [[Rosechu]] Prime. He also criticized fan fictions with him and his [[mother]], He said some people thought about or wrote these stories before [[July 2021]] in reference to the Incest Call being released and his arrest, he claimed he does not support them and believes such ideas are wrong and warned that thinking about them could lead to negative consequences in other timelines or realities.<ref>[[November 2023 social media posts#Rant against incest fics]]</ref>

===Dreams of sex with Barb===
On 10 August 2016, Chris posted a [[Facebook statuses|response]] to a mother-son couple who were arrested for incest. He admitted to "[having] dreams of having sex with my mother" but "Never acting on them ever." Among other things, he also implied that incest "offers a chance for better teaching the child how to better satisfy their eventual partner(s)." All this is in stark contrast to his earlier condemnation of incest, which raises the question of whether Chris was being TRUE and HONEST but changed his opinion later thanks to his growing degeneracy, or the likelier possibility it was [[Chris and hypocrisy|all for show]].

{{quotebox|I have a few things to say in response to this article. Firstly, the child was over 18, and surely the mother has talked it out with him beforehand. The child might have had social problems, or a situation where socializing or going out to socialize with other people, was a Greater Difficulty. Financial situation to prevent paying someone else to come over and help out in the situation. Moreover, it was the lifelong affections between parent and child. Also, the mother probably could not bear any ovum for children anymore.
Anyhow, who among Everyone in this world has not had a dream of having sex with one of their parents? Never acting on them ever, I, myself, Did have dreams of having sex with my mother.
Although incest is quite controversial topic, but there are circumstances where there would be not so much harm as one may think, feel or believe. The child is over 18; the mother is unable to have any more children at the time; birth control and protection is available and can be used (in a case of father/daughter, birth control Definitely should be used anyhow). Also, consider if the child is adopted; not as much biological.
Plus, this offers a chance for better teaching the child how to better satisfy their eventual partner(s). The schools can only teach from books; not so much practice. And Nobody wants to end up being a 20 or 30-plus year old Virgin. I know; That is a Huge, Enduring Pain.
Unless the sex act was abusive, hurtful, or Would result in an unwanted birth of a physical or mental challenged child, I would not judge or persecute the parent and child. I would encourage the child to socialize more; maybe make it easier for the child to meet more people his/her age.
Do Not send the mother and son to jail!}}

On 13 September 2019, while [[Spirit possession|role-playing]] as Magi-Chan, Chris would describe Barb as a "guilty pleasure waifu."<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts#Barbara was more of a "guilty pleasure" waifu]]</ref>

===Actual sex with Barb===

While the prospect of Chris having sex with Barb was joked about for many years, most people did not believe Chris would actually go through with it. Before the [[Incest call]] was leaked, there were numerous warning signs of what was to come, mainly being the fact Barb would force Chris to spoon her in bed for many years, and telling Mia Hamm that the sexual massage he gave her was the same that he gave his mother. Their actions around each other have indicated a history of incestuous interest, however many just assumed that this was a combination of Chris's [[autism]] making him act inappropriately and Barb's infamously controlling behaviour.

After the incest calls were leaked it was revealed that Chris had been engaging in regular sex with Barb every 3 nights or so since 27 June 2021. His "seduction" methods included giving her full body massages while making attempts to finger her, kissing her on the lips with Barb refusing to open her mouth and Chris making "Psychic connections" with her before, during and after their romps in the hay.

It's also noteworthy that Chris refers to Barb as "Barbie Chan" almost exclusively now; whether this has something to do with her supposed anime fanfiction characteristics, a bizarre pet name or Chris trying to subconsciously distance himself from their familial bonds is unknown.

==Rape==
Chris was very apathetic about the idea of consent, and to a larger extent, the act of rape. When [[PandaHalo]] told him she was raped by [[Clyde Cash]], he reacted nonchalantly. He even thought it would be appropriate for Panda to ''move in'' with her rapist ([[Chris and religion|which is technically in-line with certain archaic Christian principles]]), whom he called a "good man" for regretting the rape and for being willing to take care of the ensuing child.<ref>[[IRC (21 January 2009)]]</ref> Later on, long after the PandaHalo saga was over, he would wish her and her rapist a happy marriage.<ref>[[Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts (CWCipedia page)#Sarah Cassandra McKenzie, A.K.A. PandaHalo]]</ref> In [[iPods Down and Listen Up]], he didn't seem to realize that his improvised lyrics detailed a sexual act that would almost certainly be construed by others as rape. Chris eventually compared his ordeals with the trolls, particularly during the Classic Era to rape in his Facebook posts. (Since [[BlueSpike]]'s [[Julie Reveals Herself|most infamous incident]] involved an act that could be described as sexual abuse in front of several people, this is admittedly a fitting description.)

As far as ''Chris'' being a potential rapist is concerned, the situation was more complicated. For starters, as explained earlier, he admitted that he drew [[ShecameforCWC.JPG]] to prevent himself from acting on his sexual impulses against [[Megan Schroeder]], who had previously scolded him for inappropriately touching her. During a particularly [[IRC (23 July 2009)|disturbing chat]], he ([[:File:BillRiley.jpg|incognito]]) suggested that the trolls try to convince him to rape [[Rocky Shoemaker]]. He also evidently saw no issue with rape by fraud (essentially having sex with someone while tricking them into believing you're somebody else, meaning they didn't consent with you) as seen with his comic book counterpart when he travels forwards in time to have sex with his future wife [[Lovely Weather]] in the guise of being his future self [[Transgender|(whom is definitely a different person in the future)]]. During the [[Kacey Calls]], he attempted unsuccessfully to lure her to his place in the guise of being [[Liquid Chris]], again seeing absolutely nothing wrong with that.

In all likelihood, though, these parts of his behavior are most likely explained by the keys to understanding his behavior overall: his ignorance about the world and his persecution complex causes him to be quite [[naïve]] about how bad rape actually is. With the Rocky situation above, he likely said that as part of an odd, roundabout scheme to get the trolls arrested, but it's still pretty fucked up that he'd even suggest something like this, let alone tell her about it after.

In one of the [[Kacey Calls]], Chris states he believes that abortion in cases of rape should be the choice of the victim, and that they should not be pressured by others in their decision.

Despite joking about how uncomfortably close he was to his own mother, few actually believed that Chris had it in him to commit an act of rape. For instance, he tried to kiss [[Emily]] and gave up when she said no,<ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#A precious farewell (1:29:35–1:31:10)]]</ref> showing that he does understand the importance of consent... Or at least, he ''used'' to. Unfortunately, it seems that as of 2014, he has decided that he won't take "no" for an answer, and basically ''molested'' [[Catherine#The Date|Catherine during their second outing]] by hugging her and burying his head in her breasts even after she flatly told him not to. This gets even more disturbing when you consider [[Catherine E-mails#It IS Your Fault!|this e-mail]], where Chris outright says that he's [[Chris and his Ego|"entitled to a relationship"]]. Also not helping matters was Chris kissing multiple guests who posed with him at the [[TooManyGames]] convention regardless of consent, which ultimately got him kicked out.

Furthermore, it was argued that Chris didn't have a history of violence conducive to attempting sexual assault. Aside from his [[Death threats#Likelihood of Acting Out on Death Threats|habit of dishing out threats he can't possibly carry out]], [[28 October 2011|hitting Michael Snyder with a car]], and [[26 December 2014|macing a manager in the chest]], Chris is physically [[Chris and health|very weak and unfit]], and simply could not overpower an able-bodied person – the only outcome of him attempting it would be a swift knee to the [[duck]] followed by a rousing round of [[Kick the Autistic|America's favorite game]]. However, given Catherine's experience with Chris during their outing (in her words, she was taken by surprise and couldn't react to it), it was encouraged that women should exercise caution around him.

Interestingly, Chris details in [[Announcement 06292016]] that he wants all men to stay an arm's length distance away from him. Along with showing the insecurities he possesses concerning men, Chris seems to think that he is [[Chris and his ego|an attractive enough]] [[Transgender|transwoman]] for [[Jacob Sockness|a man]] to consider raping him.

==See also==
* [[Affair with Mother]]
* [[China]]
* [[Chris and his ego]]
* [[Chris and sexuality]]
* [[Chris Sex Logs]]
* [[Duck]]
* [[Homos]]
* [[List of Chris's Adam & Eve purchases]]
* [[Mass debating]]
* [[Naive]]
* [[Pickle]]
* [[Biology#Reproductive biology|Reproductive Biology]]
* [[Semen]]
* [[ShecameforCWC.JPG]]
* [[Women's rights]]

== References ==
<references/>
{{articleofthenow}}
{{Love quest}}
{{Chris and}}
[[Category:Concepts influenced by Idea Guy]]

Chris's resume

2025-05-26T12:23:45Z

Anemichu: /* Analysis */

On 9 [[September 2009]], '''Chris's résumé''' finally surfaced onto the Internet, through the effort of a troll with a friend who worked in an HR department.

== Analysis ==

As is to be expected for someone with [[Slow-in-the-minds|no discernible skills]] and extremely limited work experience, the résumé is less than impressive. No fewer than three times, Chris pads his résumé by claiming his "volunteer work" for Pokémon league events at [[The GAMe PLACe]] and other locations as actual work experience (when in reality he had no authority, and in fact was himself closely monitored by the actual employees).

Chris's résumé includes a few points where he talks about his [[Chris and the industry|desire to work for a comics publisher]], such as DC or Archie. However, it's unlikely that Chris has sent any work or a résumé to either company, likely simply uploading it to Monster and waiting for others to contact him (not unlike his [[Attraction Sign]]). He is seemingly unaware or unwilling to accept that the industry standard for a professional graphic designer (working for DC or Archie) is not only a well-organized portfolio demonstrating samples of his work but also a bachelor's degree in Graphic Design and demonstrated proficiency in accepted design software such as the Adobe Creative Suite. Non-art work experience is rarely considered unless it is mentioned as an essential part of the job description.

His cover letter can be described as a Sonichu-driven ego rub. Even at a quick glance, one can see that three entire paragraphs are dedicated towards describing Sonichu and Rosechu and how they've made him "internet famous," instead of what it should be about ''(reasons why it would be a good idea to hire him.)'' In typical Chris-Chan fashion, he seems to think that he's in complete control of what ''(Sonichu-related)'' responsibilities he should be given in the organization, and makes a serious no-no by mentioning that the job should have "good pay," which is usually a turn-off to serious employers.

His "quick construction skills from scratch" (especially considering that he's referring to constructing decks in a children's card game) would mean nothing in interviewing for the very job he seeks to obtain. Indeed, it would be of no interest to any potential employer, for that matter. Furthermore, according to two people who actually had a chance to play card games with Chris, his deck construction skills [[Mimms and Lucas Q&A#Follow-up|are severely lacking]].

The resume also has a number of [[CWCism|CWC-style butcheries of well known idioms]], such as the particularly grating phrase "Elbow-greased strength," which only serve to make it more nonsensical.

Furthermore, while the field for "job objectives" offers three lines for a succinct answer, Chris, typical of his [[CWCipedia|rambling style]], attaches three extra ''pages'' of useless junk, thus ensuring that any potential employer will not make any efforts to read the entire résumé.

Also included is a hand-written "Resume Writing Worksheet," a presumably earlier draft with slightly different wording and a greater emphasis on the dang, dirty trolls. As is the nature of resumes, this material is rather repetitive.

= Chris's cover letter =
8/16/2009

Dear Hiring Manager:

I, Christian Weston Chandler, Birth name: Christopher, born on February 24, 1982 in [[Charlottesville]], Virginia, am an artist with vast experiences in multiple art classes with multiple media throughout my whole lifetime from [[Chris's education#Greene County Primary School|Green County Primary School]] to [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|Piedmont Virginia Community Collge]], with a diploma from [[Manchester High School]] and a degree and certificate in Computer Aided Drafting and Design ([[CADD]]) from PVCC.

Since the inspiration and conception of Sonichu, the Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon on March 17, 2000, I have grown further in his stories, plots and adventures in a series of hand-drawn and computer-edited comic books. I also have had and passed two HTML classes, and created from notepad scratch, [[CWC's PokeSite 2!]], [[CWC's Pokésite 2#Now in Spanish|El PokeSite de R.W.C.]] (Ricardo Weston Chandler was my [[Spanish]] nickname given to me during my two years of Spanish in Manchester High), and most importantly, the First and Original website dedicated to Sonichu, Rosechu and their adventures, [[CWC's Sonichu Site]].

I was also noted twice later in the periodicals of Nintendo Power magazine and PVCC's The Forum for being the original creator of Sonichu and all. (See Periodical References below).

With the Sonichu Stie originally located at <nowiki>http://sonichuchandler.tripod.com/cwcson.htm</nowiki>, it stayed online from about 2000 until early 2009, whereas my Sonichu and Rosechu fanbase has grown massively over the years; there were also internet bullies and trolls. And the trolls hacked into and compromised my original Tripod webhosting account. I've had to pull the plug on the Tripod account and move on to another webhosting site. The second webhosting account suffered the same fate as the first, and then I moved to GoDaddy. It got hacked too, and so I pulled the plug on all my websites late May, 2009. I stayed off for about two months, then a gal-pal of mine about that time set up for me a start of what is now the New Original CWC's Sonichu and Rosechu Site; the wikipedia-styled [[Cwcipedia]] at <nowiki>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Main_Page</nowiki>. As I have done on the previous site, I have re-uploaded my Sonichu comic pages, and I am steadily expanding further with more stories and character bio pages.

I would like to be paper-published with a comic book company like Archie, Marvel, DC or Dark Horse comics, complete with Official Sonichu and Rosechu Merchandise I can personally sign-off on to follow for my Worldwide Fanbase.

Accept no imposturous substitutes who claim to be me or have any rights on my Sonichu and Rosechu stuff; I stand strong with my continued use of the Copyright © symbol on each of all my books and original singular art pieces and the date of creation of March 17, 2000. I have eye-witnesses at Manchester High of Sonichu's conception and creation on that date. It also bothers me that the trolls are even selling bootleg copies of my Life DVD, [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|Christian Weston Chandler. Yep...I'm On T.V.]], which was originally intent solely for family and close friend distribution. Trust one of the trolls to snag a copy and rip the vieos from the six-hour DVD-R.

I became famous without having to leave my house or go out-of-state or city.

After recent realization, on about July 17, 2009, of what I want to do, I wish to make it all official; get me paper-published with a comic book company like Archie, Marvel, DC or Dark Horse comics, with continuing work as a comic book artist and story creator/editor, good pay, eventual official Sonichu and Rosechu merchandise that I can personally and officially sign-off on and further enforce my nine-year-old copyright with a more peaceful future.

I feel that my Sonichu and Rosechu and self adventure stories would be an asset for the Comic Book, and all associated, industries.

Thank you for your time and consideration. I hope to have the opportunity to discuss the opening with you in person.

Sincerely

Christian Weston Chandler

Periodical References

''Nintendo Power'', Volume 179, May, 2004, Page 89: "Sonichu's Cwcville Documentary"

''Piedmont Virginia Community College's The Forum'', Volume 1, No. 13, April 26, 2004: "Meet Sonichu: Student Featured in Nintendo Power," By Kari Mitchell, The Forum Assistant Editor.

= The résumé =

The following is Chris's complete résumé, as it was posted on the popular résumé website [[Wikipedia:Monster.com|Monster.com]], with only minor edits for wiki styling.

==Contact Info==

"[[Christopher's name change|Christopher]]" [[Christian Weston Chandler]] 
[[14 Branchland Court|14 Branchland Ct.]], [[Ruckersville, VA]] 22968-9545 
Home: 434-990-0198
Cell: 434-760-0848 
[[CWCipedia|Cwcipedia]]/CWC’s Sonichu and Rosechu Site! 
<nowiki>[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Main_Page http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Main_Page]</nowiki>

==Objectives==

I wish to make my [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] franchise Official, with getting me paper published at [[Wikipedia:Archie Comics|Archie]], [[Wikipedia:Marvel Comics|Marvel]], [[Wikipedia:DC Comics|DC]] or [[Wikipedia:Dark Horse Comics|Dark Horse Comics]], with continuing work as Comic Book Artist and Story Creator/Editor, good pay, eventual Official Sonichu and Rosechu Merchandise that I, personally, can officially sign-off on and further enforce my nine-year-old copyright with a more peaceful future. (See attached pages for more info).

==Experience==
''[Note: for some reason, Chris listed each experience with an "Experience" heading. It is unknown why Chris did this, but for the sake of clarity, all job experience is collated into one heading.]''

Date of Employment: March 17, [[2000]] – Current 
(Self) C.W.C. Comics 
Ruckersville, VA 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: Drawing, writing, coloring and story-telling the continuing adventures of Sonichu, Rosechu and myself from life, creating from scratch and setting up the first original Sonichu Site, [[CWC’s Sonichu Site]], as well as its sibling sites.
* Functional Skills: [[Chris and art|Great hand-drawing skills]], [[Chris and writing|story-telling and editing]], building design from Computer Aided Drafting and Design ([[CADD]]), quick touch-typing skills, [[Getting Foam Ed|great Photoshop experiences]], good HTML skills.
* Transferable Skills: All of the above.

Date of Employment: June, [[2003]] – September, 2003 
[[Cutco]] Cutlery 
[[Charlottesville, VA]] 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: Salesman of their fine [[Pocket knife|cutlery]] with the patented double-d edges.
* Functional Skills: Good people/social skills, great memorization of the salesman routine (won my boss over greatly with that memorizing).
* Transferable Skills: Good people/social skills, memorizing and swift learning.

Date of Employment: August, [[2001]] – [[Lies|October, 2001]]<ref>In the [[Father Call]], Chris tells Kacey's Father that on September 11th he was shopping with his mother because he had ''just'' been fired from Wendy's.</ref> 
[[Wendy's|Wendys]]''[sic]'' Restaurant 
Ruckersville, VA 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: Cleaning trays, tables and carpet/tile flooring, keeping the place neat and serving the customers with kind, understanding help.
* Functional Skills: Elbow-greased strength, good people/social skills.
* Transferable Skills: All of the above.

Date of Employment: March, [[1998]] ''[sic]''<ref>The Pokémon trading card game wasn't released in North America until December 1998, and its official league wasn't founded until the following year.</ref> – June, [[2000]] 
[[Wikipedia:Books-a-Million|Books-a-Million]] 
[[Wikipedia:Midlothian,_VA|Midlothian, VA]] 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: I volunteered to help out as the Gym Leader’s Assistant for the Pokémon Trading Card Game league. I have taught many children how to play the game with care and respect, constructed their 60-card decks from their scattered collection with sound thought and speed skimming skills. I also [[Pedofork|watched over the children]] as I have played with them in the Pokémon Trading Card Game.
* Functional Skills: Elbow-greased strength, good people/social skills, quick construction skills from scratch, speed thinking.
* Transferable Skills: All of the above.

Date of Employment: June, 2000 – June, [[2002]] 
Toys “R” Us 
Charlottesville, VA 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: I volunteered to help out as the Gym Leader’s Assistant for the Pokémon Trading Card Game league. I have taught many children how to play the game with care and respect, constructed their 60-card decks from their scattered collection with sound thought and speed skimming skills. I also watched over the children as I have played with them in the Pokémon Trading Card Game.
* Functional Skills: Elbow-greased strength, good people/social skills, quick construction skills from scratch, speed thinking.
* Transferable Skills: All of the above.

Date of Employment: June, 2002 – June, [[2007]] 
[[The GAMe PLACe|The (Game & Hobby) Place]] 
Charlottesville, VA 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: I volunteered to help out as the Gym Leader’s Assistant for the Pokémon Trading Card Game league. I have taught many children how to play the game with care and respect, constructed their 60-card decks from their scattered collection with sound thought and speed skimming skills. I also watched over the children as I have played with them in the Pokémon Trading Card Game.
* Functional Skills: Elbow-greased strength, good people/social skills, quick construction skills from scratch, speed thinking.
* Transferable Skills: All of the above.

==School Experience==

===Professional Education===

Dates of Attendance: 9/1/1996 to 6/15/2000
[[Manchester High School]]
Chesterfield County, Virginia

* High School Diploma with [[Honor Roll]] Grades.
* Honor Roll Star Pin awarded at Graduation.
* Certificate for serving on the varsity basketball team during my freshman year.

===Academic Education===

Dates of Attendance: August, 2000 to 6/1/2006
[[Piedmont Virginia Community College]]
Charlottesville, Virginia

* Made the Dean’s List with Honor Roll Grades
* Computer Aided Drafting and Design, CADD, Associates Degree
* Computer Aided Drafting and Design, CADD, Career Studies Certificate

==References==

Susan Hannifan

* PVCC Guidance Counsoler
* 501 College Dr. Charlottesville, VA 22902
* 434-961-5281
* shannifan@pvcc.edu

Reverend Elizabeth Foss

* Pastor of [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church]]
* 1901 Thomson Rd. Charlottesville, VA 22903
* 434-296-6976
* elizabethfoss22@earthlink.net

[[Rocky|Rocky Shoemaker]]

* Pastoral Counsoler
* 1901 Thomson Rd. Charlottesville, VA 22903
* 434-966-9636
* revrocky48@gmail.com

Tony Wayne

* Physics Teacher at Albemarle High School/Volunteer Pokémon TCG League Gym Leader
* 2275 Hydraulic Rd. Charlottesville, VA 22901
* 434-975-9300 Ext. 60265
* vastphysics@comcast.net

==Job Objective, Full Story==

I, [[Christian Weston Chandler]], Birth name: [[Christopher]], born on February 24, [[1982]] in [[Charlottesville]], [[Virginia]], am an artist with vast experiences in multiple art classes with multiple media throughout my whole lifetime from Green County Primary School to [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|Piedmont Virginia Community Collge]], with a diploma from [[Manchester High School]] and a degree and certificate in [[Computer Aided Drafting and Design]] (CADD) from PVCC.

Since the inspiration and conception of [[Sonichu]], the [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|Electric-Hedgehog Pokémon]] on March 17, [[2000]], I have grown further in his stories, plots and adventures in a series of hand-drawn and computer-edited comic books. I also have had and passed two HTML classes, and created from notepad scratch, [[CWC's Pokésite 2|CWC’s PokéSite 2!, El PokéSite de R.W.C.]] ([[Ricardo]] Weston Chandler was my Spanish nickname given to me during my two years of Spanish in Manchester High), and most importantly, the First and Original website dedicated to Sonichu, Rosechu and their adventures, [[CWC's Sonichu Site!|CWC’s Sonichu Site]].

I was also noted twice later in the periodicals of [[Nintendo Power]] magazine and PVCC’s The Forum for being the original creator of Sonichu and all. (See Periodical References below)

With the Sonichu [[Chris and English#Spelling|Stie]] originally located at <nowiki>http://sonichuchandler.tripod.com/cwcson.htm</nowiki>, it stayed online from about [[2000]] until early [[2009]], whereas my Sonichu and Rosechu fanbase has grown massively over the years; there were also internet bullies and [[trolls]]. And the trolls hacked into and compromised my original Tripod webhosting account. I’ve had to pull the plug on the Tripod account and move on to another webhosting site. The second webhosting account suffered the same fate as the first, and then I moved to GoDaddy. It got hacked too, and so I pulled the plug on all my websites late May, 2009. I stayed off for about two months, then a gal-pal of mine about that time set up for me a start of what is now the New Original CWC’s Sonichu and Rosechu Site; the wikipedia-styled [[Cwcipedia]] at <nowiki>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Main_Page</nowiki>. As I have done on the previous site, I have re-uploaded my Sonichu comic pages, and I am steadily expanding further with more stories and character bio pages.

I would like to be paper-published with a comic book company like Archie, Marvel, DC or Dark Horse comics, complete with Official Sonichu and Rosechu Merchandise I can personally sign-off on to follow for my Worldwide [[Fanbase]].

Accept no imposturous substitutes who claim to be me or have any rights on my Sonichu and Rosechu stuff; I stand strong with my continued use of the Copyright © symbol on each of all my books and original singular art pieces and the date of creation of March 17, 2000. I have eye-witnesses at Manchester High of Sonichu’s conception and creation on that date. It also bothers me that the trolls are even selling bootleg copies of my Life DVD, [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|Christian Weston Chandler. Yep…I’m On T.V.]], which was originally intent solely for family and close friend distribution. Trust one of the trolls to snag a copy and rip the vieos from the six-hour DVD-R.

I became famous without having to leave my house or go out-of-state or city.

After recent realization, on about July 17, [[2009]], of what I want to do, I wish to make it all official; get me paper-published with a comic book company like [[Wikipedia:Archie Comics|Archie]], [[Wikipedia:Marvel Comics|Marvel]], [[Wikipedia:DC Comics|DC]] or [[Wikipedia:Dark Horse Comics|Dark Horse comics]], with continuing work as a comic book artist and story creator/editor, good pay, eventual official Sonichu and Rosechu merchandise that I can personally and officially sign-off on and further enforce my nine-year-old copyright with a more peaceful future.

“Christopher” Christian Weston Chandler, August 11, 2009

© March 17, 2000 by “Christopher” Christian Weston Chandler.

==Periodical References==

* ''Nintendo Power'' – Volume 179, May 2004, Page 89 – [[Nintendo Power Magazine#The Documentary|Sonichu’s Cwcville Documentary]]
* Piedmont Virginia Community College’s ''The Forum'' – Volume 1, No. 13, 26 April 2004 – Meet Sonichu – Student Featured in Nintendo Power – By Kari Mitchell, The Forum Assistant Editor.

==Additional Information==
'''Career Highlights:''' Near-Daily updates on my Cwcipedia website, and my continued Comic Book Page drawing, coloring, writing and editing. Great hand-drawing skills, story-telling and editing, building design from Computer Aided Drafting and Design (CADD), quick touch-typing skills, great Photoshop experiences, good HTML skills. Good people/social skills, memorizing and swift learning. Elbow-Greased Strength.

'''Skills:'''

* Great hand-drawing skills (3/3)

* Story-Telling and Editing (3/3)

* Building design from Computer Aided Drafting and Design (3/3)

* Quick Touch Typing (3/3)

* Great Photoshop experiences (3/3)

* Good HTML skills (2/3)

* Good people/social skills (3/3)

* Memorizing and Swift Learning (3/3)

* Elbow-Greased Strength (3/3)

'''Professional Memberships:''' [blank]

'''Interests & Hobbies:''' Drawing, building, videogames, music, movies or TV shows, self-reflecting in peaceful situations.

'''Have you served in the military?''' [[Bob|Other Military Family Member]]

'''Do you have security clearance?''' None

'''Are you willing to relocate?''' Yes

'''Are you willing to travel?''' Up to 25% travel

'''Where are you authorized to work?''' US

'''Ethnicity:''' White (Not of Hispanic Origin)

'''Gender:''' Male

== Career Goals ==

'''What job titles are you looking for?'''

Paper-Published comic book author/artist/editor

'''What are your must-haves in your career (e.g., bring pets to work, free coffee)?'''

Good Pay

'''Where would you like to work?'''

[blank]

'''What skills do you want to develop?'''

Better my Hand-Drawing, writing and editing from after 9 years of practice.

'''What salary range are you looking for?'''

[blank]

'''Which companies would you like to work for?'''

Archie Comics, Marvel Comics, DC Comics or Dark Horse Comics

'''What industries would you like to work in?'''

Printing and Publishing

'''What size company would you like to work for?'''

[blank]

'''Which type of company would you like to work for?'''

Public, Private

'''What career level would you like to reach?'''

Experienced (Non-Manager)

==Chris's Resume Writing Worksheet==

===Contact Information===
'''Name:''' "Christopher" Christian Weston Chandler

'''Address:''' 14 Branchland Ct.

Ruckersville, VA 22968-9545

'''Telephone:''' Home: (434)-990-0198 Cell: (434)-760-0848

'''E-mail:''' ChrisChanSonichu@aol.com

===Job Objective===
I am an Artist with Vast Experiences in Multiple Art Classes in my lifetime; with a Degree and Certificate in Computer Aided Drafting & Design from Piedmont Virginia Community...(see attached sheets)

===Work Experience (Tip: List most recent first)===
'''Employer Name:''' Wendys

'''City, State:''' Ruckersville, VA

'''Job Title:''' Basic Employee

'''Start date-End date:''' August, 2001 - October, 2001

'''Your primary duties were:''' Cleaning Trays, Cleaning Tables, Vaccuming & Cleaning the Carpet/Tile Flooring, being kind and serving to the customers, and taking garbage to dumpster.

'''List Functional Skills:''' Elbow Greasing Cleaning, Kind, Polite, People Social Skills.

'''List Transferable Skills:''' Kind, Polite People Social Skills.

'''Employer Name:''' Cutco Cutlary

'''City, State:''' Charlottesville, VA

'''Job Title:''' <s>Sales Rep/</s>Salesman

'''Start date-End date:''' June, 2003 - September, 2003

'''Your primary duties were:''' Salesman of their fine cutlary with their patented Double-D Edges.

'''List Functional Skills:''' <s>Pep</s> People/Social Skills, Good Memorizing of the Salesman Routine; won my Boss OVER GREATLY with that Memorizing

'''List Transferable Skills:''' People/Social Skills, Memorizing + Learning

'''Employer Name:''' Self

'''City, State:''' Ruckersville, VA

'''Job Title:''' Artist, HTML Wiz

'''Start date - End date:''' March 17, 2000 - ????

'''Your primary duties were:''' Drawing, <s>an</s> writing and story-telling the continuing adventures of Sonichu, Rosechu, and myself from LIFE.

'''List Functional Skills:''' Great Hand-Drawing Skills, Story-Creating, Building Designing (Designed CWCville Shopping Mall w. Mayor's Office in CADD), Quick Touch-Typing Skills, Photoshop Experiences

'''List Transferable Skills:''' ALL OF THE ABOVE.

===Education (List most recent first)===
'''Name of School or Institution:''' Manchester High School

'''City, State:''' Chesterfield Co., VA

'''Type of Training or Certification:''' Diploma

'''Start date - End date:''' Sept., 1996 - June, 2000

'''Name of School or Institution:''' Piedmont Virginia Community College

'''City, State:''' Charlottesville, VA

'''Type of Training or Certification:''' Computer Aided Drafting & Design Degree + Certificate

'''Start date - End date:''' August, 2000 - June, 2006

===References (Tip: avoid using family members)===
'''Name:''' Susan Hannifan

'''Relationship:''' PVCC Guidance Counsoler

'''Address:''' 501 College Dr.

'''Telephone number:''' (434)-961-5281

'''Name:''' Rocky Shoemaker

'''Relationship:''' Pastoral Counsoler

'''Address:''' Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church

'''Telephone number:''' (434)-996-9636

'''Name:''' Elizabeth Foss

'''Relationship:''' Pastor

'''Address:''' [blank]

'''Telephone number:''' (434)-296-6976

===Resume Writing Worksheet Job Objective===
"Christopher" Christian Weston Chandler.

I am an Artist with vast experiences in Multiple Art Classes my whole lifetime from Greene County Primary to Piedmont Virginia Community College with multiple Media experiences, with a Manchester High School Diploma and PVCC Degree + Certificate in Computer Aided Drafting & Design (CADD). Since March 17, 2000, I have started inspiration with my Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon creations, ''Sonichu & Rosechu'', and grew further in their life's Stories and Plots in a series of Hand-Drawn and Computer-Edited Comic Books. I also have had and passed Two HTML classes, and created from Notepad Scratch CWC's PokeSite 2, El PokeSite De R.W.C. (Ricardo Weston Chandler; my Spanish Nickname from my taking of Two Years of Spanish at Manchester High), and more importantly, THE Original and First Sonichu Site, CWC's Sonichu Site @ <nowiki>http://sonichuchandler.tripod.com/cwcson.htm</nowiki>. Sadly, after years had passed, in early 2009, my webhosting account was compromised by Hackers + Internet Trolls/Bullies. I've had to go from webhost to webhost Twice to keep my Original Sites Up. Sadly, the Trolls got into them as well. I had pulled the plug and keep my sites offline for Two Months. <s>And recently</s> from Late May, 2009 at GoDaddy.com. And Now, a close real-life friend of mine put together for me the start of what is NOW My Official Sonichu Site, A.K.A., Cwcipedia. As with my past on CWC's Sonichu Site, I have reuploaded my Sonichu Comic Pages and started further expanding in Stories + Bio Pages.

I would like to be Paper-Published with a Comic Book Company like Archie<s>s</s>, Marvel, DC or Darkhorse, complete with Official Merchandise to follow for my Worldwide Fanbase.

Unfortunately, I have heard of impostors trying to claim my Sonichu & Rosechu Franchise (is a good word I think), but I Stand Strong with my continued Legal Use of the copyright © symbol, and the Date of March 17, 2000. I have eye-witnesses at M.H.S. of Sonichu's conception and creation on That Day. And even worse, making money selling Fake Merchandise and Bootleg copies of my Life to 25-YEAR-OLD D.V.D, "Christian Weston Chandler...Yep...I'm on T.V.," which was Originally distributed solely to Family and Close Friends. Trust the Trolls to pose as my Primary School Girlfriend Crush and con a copy out of me late 2008.

I became famous, and I never had to leave my house or go out-of-state or city.

Anyway, I want to MAKE IT ALL OFFICIAL, get me Paper-Published with continuing work, a good, reasonable amount of money, <s>and mak</s> further Enforce my Nine-YEAR-OLD Copyright, and make my future more peaceful. Also, to put those Dang, Dirty Trolls to Rest and At Bay.

Christopher Christian Weston Chandler

August 11, 2009.

===Resume Writing Worksheet Gallery===
<center><gallery>
Image:scan.jpg|The concept of "Most recent" escapes Chris.
Image:scan0001.jpg|Notice how he can't keep himself from including Sonichu in EVERYTHING.
Image:scan0002.jpg|His only references are a guidance counselor that he had almost a decade ago and two pastors at his church.
Image:scan0003.jpg|Largely the same as the other pages except he whines about his websites getting hacked.
Image:scan0004.jpg|Even his shitty DVD is worth mentioning apparently.
Image:scan0005.jpg|He wants to put the dang, dirty trolls to rest.
</gallery></center>

==See Also==

*[[Chris and work]]

==References==
<references/>

{{The Internet}}

[[Category:Historical Documents]]

Chris and work

2025-05-25T17:35:56Z

Anemichu: /* Past stance on employment */

{{quote|[...] comments that are truly of Good Intentions of self-improvement and constructive criticism, versus the truly Bad Intentions of spamming actual hate speech (Get A Job).|Chris considers "get a job" to be hate speech and commentary from [[enablers]] kissing his ass to be constructive criticism.}}
[[Image:Heavylifting.jpg|thumb|right|[[Chris]] doing anything that doesn't revolve around [[daydreams|daydream]]ing over his [[Messiah complex#Jesus Reborn|fantasies]].]]

Chris is infamous for his laziness and his dependence on his [[Borb|elderly parents]], which inhibits him from wanting to '''work'''. He briefly held [[Wendy's|one]] job – [[Cutco|two]] if pushing it – in his early 20s, but was unsurprisingly fired from them fairly quickly.

Despite his crippling [[debt]], Chris has vehemently refused to even attempt to obtain any kind of employment whatsoever, due to wanting to perpetually [[Chris and nostalgia|live like a child]] – a stance that has become so potent that he believes that suggesting it to him should be deemed as "hate speech".<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1194090568898494464</ref>

==Reasons for Chris's refusal to work==

===External factors===

====Criminal record====
Chris, like many of us, has had at least one run-in with the [[jerkop|police]]. However, not only has Chris managed at least 6 [[Chris and the law|run-ins]] with law enforcement, but at least 2 wobbler felony charges (which got [[28 October 2011|downgraded to misdemeanor]] status or got dismissed due to [[Autism disorder deferred disposition|an alternative sentencing program]]), multiple misdemeanors, an EPO, and [[Jail Saga|a lengthy stay in jail]] for a charge of [[Affair with Mother|incest]].

====Parental influence====
Chris's parents, but more so [[Bob Chandler|Bob]], had encouraged him to not be employed, believing that his [[Monthly Tugboat|Social Security Disability Insurance]] (SSDI) is all he really needs to support himself - a belief that ultimately proved to be false with the advent of the [[Financhu Crisis]].

Chris claimed that "taking care" of his parents is a full-time job in its own right<ref>[[April 2017 Facebook posts#Chris explains why he won't get a job]]</ref>. Instead of getting a job to support his [[Barb|mother]], he slowly started to sell off toys he didn't play with anymore, or begged for donations online (often in the form of videos that Barb also appeared in). This was not a substantial income, and the money Chris did get was wasted in the blink of an eye. He claimed to need money for his mother's doctor's and dentist appointments, but he usually would post a few days later that he had gotten a new toy or a video game, implying that he either lied about how much the appointments cost, or that he used his mother's money just for his own selfish needs.

====Negative experiences with workers and [[Manajerks|managers]]====
While Chris has not lived a particularly good life unemployed, he also has had some [[List of places that have banned Chris|bad experiences]] with the employees and managers of several of the places he frequented, which further shows some of Chris's views on what it means to be employed. The way he has treated such people provides insight into Chris's delusional ideas about the role of an employee. It is a manager's duty to take action in difficult situations, like if a customer is loitering or causing a disturbance, two things that Chris has done many times in the past. Chris however, unaware of how he should act in public places, only saw such actions as a form of discrimination, solely to keep him from doing as he pleases, whether it be [[Love Quest|soliciting a girlfriend]], or [[Sonic Boom|vandalizing merchandise or property]]. These views are also apparent in some of his comics, where he depicts the employees and managers that have given him a hard time as [[manajerks|corrupt tyrants]] abusing their power.

When Chris had his only known job at Wendy's, he didn't get along with the restaurant's staff very well. He claimed his manager had a "spike on his shoulder" against him, and stated a female co-worker would repeatedly criticize and "insult" him, which in reality might have been her simply giving him constructive criticism. At one point, Chris decided to draw an unflattering picture of an older co-worker as a [[Pokémon]] on a napkin, which was allegedly the impetus behind his eventual firing from his job.

Chris also has had negative experiences with [[jerkops|mall security guards]]. [[Chris and the law|Chris's run-ins with the law]] have never been pleasant, and even though Chris does not exactly view workers and law enforcement in the same light, law enforcers are still technically employed by some organization. On various occasions, Chris has been shown to [[26 December 2014|bolt out of a GameStop in fear]] when security is called, suggesting a fear of security guards, likely stemming from [[Chris and the law#2011|previous]] [[Charlottesville Fashion Square#Chris vs. Fashion Square|experiences]].

====Financial enablers====
{{Main|Enablers}}

In the wake of the [[Idea Guys]], Chris's enabling has gone far beyond just his mother. Chris now has admiring fans that are willing to give him loads of money in order to support him. Even after being arrested, fans continued to send him money through his inmate account, as well as donating money to his livestreams when he was released from jail. This first became an issue in early 2014, when their [[14 Branchland Court|house]] burned down and his family had to move into a [[Rental House|rental home]] temporarily while it was being renovated. In response to this, followers of Chris began to send him monetary donations as well as care packages. This quickly became something Chris depended on, and he regularly begged for donations for years to come, making this form of enabling commonplace. He would often beg for money to support his family, and then conveniently have new toys visible in his room. However, this stream of income never ceased.

===Internal factors===

====Egotism and delusions====
Chris, [[Messiah complex|believing he is an omnipotent and omniscient goddess]], doesn't have time for such frivolous things as working to make a living. In [[October 2017]], Chris claimed that he was too busy with [[CWCville]] and his [[imaginary friends]], in addition to helping Barb and the pets. In [[June 2019]], Chris claimed that he was already employed by God to oversee the Dimensional Merge. Additionally, ever since Chris's transition, he feels that finding a job runs the risk of being discriminated against for his [[Transgender|tomgirl gender]], despite the fact that discrimination on the basis of gender is illegal, especially as a result of a Supreme Court ruling on 15 June 2020.

In a moment of self-awareness, Chris fears being incompetent at work, and he claimed in [[May 2018]] that he feared that weens and A-logs will harass him at work, similar to how they harassed the management of The End Games and Anytime Fitness into banning him. However, even those significantly more mentally ill or otherwise disabled can find work, meaning Chris can quickly find easy work if he really wanted to. This shows that Chris will pull any idea out of his ass to avoid having to get off of it and contribute to society.

====Lack of marketable skills====
As evidenced by his resume and lack of education, Chris lacks any marketable skills or qualifications to get anything beyond a minimum wage job in the retail or fast food industry. Given his aforementioned lofty goals for salary and demanding things like having an assistant, Chris grossly overestimates what kind of a job one can find with [[CADD|an outdated Associate's degree]] and a brief employment at Wendy's.

====General laziness====
Chris, being as lazy as he is, would find trouble keeping a job for long due to this laziness. This is evidenced by his brief stint as a Wendy's employee, in which he is quoted as taking "frequent breaks" and not taking care of his uniform.<ref>[[Jackie Chat 4]]</ref>

When creating [[Sonichu (comic)|his magnum opus]], Chris had no schedule set in stone, only taking time to write and draw pages when he had "inspiration". Arguably his most productive period was between [[Sonichu 7|2007]] and [[Sonichu 10|2010]] when he started to achieve online infamy and constantly fell for trolling schemes. Even then, these volumes took anywhere from several months to over a ''year'' before getting completed. Not to mention that Chris pretty much [[Chris and writing#Plot and Drama|wrote every ''Sonichu'' issue by the seat of his pants with minimal regard for consistency]] (and of course, writing is [[Chris and art#Visual style and most artistic fundamentals|not the only place where he fails at that]]), resulting in the self-insert fanfic clusterfuck we've known and loved since the late 2000s.

==Past stance on employment==
In the past, Chris showed some degree of interest in pursuing a career, but only for his own personal gain, rather than so that he can move out of his parents' house and obtain a degree of self-sufficiency. For example, although he expressed an interest in becoming a comic book artist, working for either Archie or DC,<ref>[[Chris's resume]]</ref> he also stated, when he completes his Love Quest, that he would stay at home while his wife works, showing that Chris was somewhat hesitant even before then. Other sources point to Chris believing that obtaining a job is only necessary to pick up a girlfriend, which is evident when he decided to take up a job in [[Cutco Cutlery]] at the beginning of his [[Love Quest]].

Key insight into Chris's attitude towards job hunting is found in his [[resume]] from 2009. In it, Chris shows he did not understand what constitutes work experience, let alone its importance. For example, he believes that doing "volunteer work" for the [[Card games|Pokémon Leagues]] at [[the GAMe PLACe]] counts as work experience. In reality, mere "volunteer work" does not typically catch the eye of most employers. Also, Chris was not a gym leader as he claimed, but rather was a substitute when the actual Gym Leader was not available. Finally, even if this could be taken into account, what experience he obtained is likely negligible, as he had no authority over the players, and was, in fact, carefully supervised by the staff. In the same résumé, he cites his production of comics as work experience, despite not doing this in a professional setting, and the product itself leaving a lot to be desired.

The résumé also shows that, in his entire adult life, not even a fraction of his time was spent on an actual job, let alone one that was full-time in a professional environment. Counting all of the positions he had that did not involve being a Gym Leader's Assistant or working on his ''Sonichu'' comics, his total work experience amounts to a grand total of 5 months, at most. This estimate is generous because, while he claimed to have worked at Wendy's for 2 months on his résumé, he also claimed that he was already fired on [[Twin Falling Towers|11 September]] to [[Kacey]]'s father. Please note that this was only across an entire two-year gap between working each of the two positions he held.

==List of jobs on Dimension 1218==

===Wendy's===
{{Main|Wendy's}}

The first place Chris attempted to work at was at his local Wendy's. While there, his primary duties were custodial in nature rather than food preparation or direct customer interaction. Despite painting himself as an employee that "serves the customers with kind, understanding help", accounts from employers and customers have shown him to be a rude and difficult employee to work with. Chris was later fired from the restaurant, giving vague and contradictory answers about his dismissal; the motive for his dismissal was either the aforementioned Pokémon caricature incident, or a time he allegedly frightened a kid to tears with his [[Donald Duck impression]].

===Cutco Cutlery===
{{Main|Cutco}}

The second and final job that Chris claims to have worked was through Cutco Cutlery, a multi-level marketing company that primarily sells overpriced knives. The company itself is deemed to be a notorious pyramid scheme and borderline scam that generally targets high school students, college students, and gullible idiots like Chris with no work experience. Chris claims to have lost this job after his boss "left at summer's end". Chris had obtained this job during the beginning of his Love Quest, which also showcases that Chris believed getting a job is only for people who want to have a girlfriend, even believing that having the job just magically improved his social skills. This job alone, believe it or not, was what made him believe himself to be a "Natural Salesperson". After this job, Chris would go out of his way to produce his [[Attraction Sign]]s, and advertise this one quality in it.

===Other employers===
Besides Wendy's and Cutco, Chris has attempted to apply for a handful of other jobs, to no avail, probably due to him complaining about trolls on his resume and believing he had held positions he considered signified employment, but was actually community service at the very most.

==Current stance on employment==
{{quote|Therefore, for all of you Haterade-Chugging “GET A JOB!” spouters out there, I suggest you Shut Up and enjoy your ability to settle in a cozy Office or wherever. For the rest of us, the worlds and the dimensions are our Offices, and we are doing our best, so we can reach our respective Fated Destined Promotions. But, I Digress.|Chris [[Chris and reality|claiming he's already employed in an alternate dimension]]}}

Considering how trolls, weens, enablers, and, quite frankly, [[Honest Content|Chris himself]] have completely mangled and destroyed his background check over the years, it is little wonder why he has lost any hope of obtaining a job. Chris even stated he was fully aware of this in a Facebook post he made on 3 [[April 2017]]. In the same post, however, he also claims that he would still refuse to obtain a job, even without all of the crazy shit that has happened in his life. He claims to fear the possibility of being discriminated against for being autistic, transgender, and having a lesbian soul. In the modern workforce, however, this misgiving is highly unjustified, as any kind of discrimination based on gender, disability or sex is usually frowned upon in the workforce, and leaves the employer liable for legal action or federal/state sanctions/fines. Besides the former two reasons, Chris claimed that gaining employment would be redundant, as he believes taking care of his aging parents actually counts as employment, despite not being paid for it.

===Job as a Goddess===
Chris now appears to believe that his true occupation at the moment is being the goddess of an alternate dimension, thanks to the influence of the [[Idea Guys]], [[Jacob Sockness]] and several other influences. In the span of two years after the aforementioned Facebook post, Chris would state on at least two occasions that he believes that the ability to support himself financially by working a job is completely useless.<ref>[[October 2018 social media posts#Response to "GET A JOB"]]</ref><ref>[[June 2019 social media posts#Chris claims to be employed overseeing Dimensional Merge]]</ref> As a matter of fact, in one of these occasions, he had actually stated that he is far too enlightened and above societal expectations to obtain an actual job, simply due to an absurd comparison he makes between the amount of time the universe will exist for against how much time he would work at a job.<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20210208080437/https://twitter.com/cwcsonichu/status/1049442246116790272</ref> As evident in the same post, as well as in a subsequent one, he actually believes that obtaining a job should not be mandatory, and even goes so far as to state that the citizens of [[CWCville]] are not required to obtain a job.

===Can Chris get a (real-life) job now?===
Many observers have admitted that it is too late for Chris to get a job now,<ref>Law-Talking Guy (28 February 2020). [https://archive.md/7GWGx Re: What will happen when Barb dies?]. ''Kiwi Farms''. Retrieved 17 July 2020.</ref> and this was long before his [[Jail Saga|arrest]] for engaging in [[Affair with Mother|incestuous acts with his mother]] permanently crippled his chances. In addition to his various [[Chris and the law|run-ins with the law]] and his local reputation for [[List of places that have banned Chris|public tantrums and violence]], Chris is {{age|1982|02|24}} years old with only [[Wendy's|one bad month of minimum-wage employment]] back in 2001, a worthless [[CADD]] certificate,<ref>The [[CADD]] certificate is worthless, because, in addition to the fallout between Chris and [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]], he only produced two menial pieces of work, and has not continued to develop his CADD skills after getting the certificate.</ref> a very brief {{w|multi-level marketing}} [[Cutco|stint]], and over a decade and a half's worth of [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|unsavory information]] about him on the internet.<ref>Bombsaway (18 December 2019). [https://archive.md/VUWuy Re: What will happen when Barb dies?]. ''Kiwi Farms''. Retrieved 19 December 2019.</ref> Chris has also not applied for a job since [[Kacey Call 21|September 2009]], and his [[:File:Scan0001.jpg|Sonichu-laden]] resume is both long out-of-date and unimpressive even for the standards of when it was made.

While Chris's court case ultimately ended with the entire thing being [[Autism Deferral|dismissed]] — thus, letting him escape without a felony charge or being placed on the Sex Offender Registry — it's still likely this will be the final death blow to any sort of chance of him finding work in the future. Even if Chris ''does'' manage to miraculously turn his life around and get a legitimate job, there is a very, very significant chance that obsessive [[weening|weens]] and [[A-Logging|A-Logs]] will harass his employer(s) into terminating him as soon as they get wind of it; similar to how they harassed the management of [[The End Games]] and [[Anytime Fitness]] into [[ban|banning]] Chris simply because he was there.<ref name=harassment>[[May 2018 social media posts#A new excuse not to get a job|May 2018 social media posts § A new excuse not to get a job]]</ref>

In short, Chris's claims that he can never get a job may be valid, albeit for different reasons to what he has in mind. Nearly all employers are unwilling to tolerate any person with that kind of background, especially with what we know now.

==Online Activity==
{{quote|I have been drawing. I'm just waiting until it's complete before puting anything of it online.
|Chris on [[Bluesky]]}}

Several orbiters of Chris have commented on his inactivity as of late, especially when it came to producing artwork or his comics.

==Chores==
{{Dated}}
{{quote|I work hard for my father in his garden! I pulled weeds! Those weeds are very hard to pull!|Chris, [[Father_Call#Maturity_and_Chores_.2839:17-48:08.29|telling a former U.S. Marine]] about the "heavy burdens" in his life}}

Aside from a few part-time jobs, from which he got fired shortly after being accepted, Chris, during his time on 14 Branchland Ct, was also responsible for doing certain '''chores''' around the household. To him, chores are menial tasks that [[Barb]] forces him to perform for her. Since these chores are the closest thing in Chris's life resembling actual work, and one of the few things taking him away from his [[video games]], [[Chris and reality|going into deep thought about other dimensions]] and attending [[BronyCon]], they are a frequent source of [[stress]] and complaining for Chris. On the other hand, Chris also sees these chores as nothing more than to prove that he is not lazy, in which case he believes these chores are a good example of what a hard-working, respectable, [[autism|high-functioning autistic]] he really is.

===Chris loves chores===
[[Image:0720-PattisDoghuseISO.JPG|thumb|right|"That thing had to weigh, like, 5, 10 tons!"]]
[[Image:0626-BobbyInGarden.jpg|thumb|right|Bob working alone in the garden, on the verge of a 4th heart attack.]]

Chris's most notorious mention of his chores is in the [[Father Call]], where he desperately tries to prove his worthiness to [[Matthew Devoria]] by listing some of the "hard work" he has done around the house, such as sitting on a riding lawnmower, moving chairs and carrying a [[Patti Chandler|doghouse]] across the yard. In fact, many of the "chores" he whines about are things he only did literally one time. He also compares his pulling weeds in the "hot, hot sun" to war veteran Matt's time served in the Gulf War.

Chris does not limit himself to only doing chores in real life. He also enjoys spending hours upon hours performing virtual chores in ''[[Animal Crossing Documentary|Animal Crossing]]''. These are his favorite chores to do, because not only is he able to sit on his fat ass all day while tapping at his controller, he is also rewarded for performing these tasks! As fun as this sounds, by his early 30s it seems to just be another part of Chris's daily routine, at one point telling [[Julie]] that he had to take a break from his computer to "get [his] chores done in ACCityFolk".<ref>[[BlueSpike Skype Logs 6]]</ref> He eventually stopped doing these chores all together after his GameCube disintegrated in the [[2014]] [[Destruction Of Chris's House|fire]].

In Chris's other favorite fictional world, [[CWCville]], [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] also does his share of the housework, as Chris elaborately explained in [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Sonichu#C.W.C._Gets_A_Big_Power.21 his CWCipedia bio]. Between fighting evil-doers and saving the world from homosexuality, he even finds time to mow the lawn with his loyal wife [[Rosechu (character)|Rosechu]]. After the kids have been sent off to school, Sonichu and Rosechu go out and vacuum to the extreme!<ref>[[A Sonichu Day]]</ref> Chris, on the other hand, is far too busy with his [[Sub-Episodes|mayoral duties]] to worry about chores, so instead he makes his secretary, [[Allison Amber]], do all of the work.

Chris [[dreams]] of one day being a "house husband", doing chores for his [[Sweetheart|wife]] and [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|daughter]] at home all day, while the wife goes to work and earns money for the family. In a chat with [[Clyde Cash]], Clyde questions Chris's ability to take care of himself and his sweetheart. This causes Chris to go on for what seems like an hour, listing all the chores he is capable of performing around the house. He is very proud of his ability to load dishes into the dishwasher and put garbage into a trash can.<ref>[[Mumble 3]]</ref>

Despite these many difficult, stressful, back-breaking chores that Chris spends his time doing, the Chandler family's [[14 Branchland Court|house]] was still a disgusting pigsty that Bob falsely believed was on the verge of [[THAT IS MY HOUSE#Uncut|being condemned]] by the Greene County Health Department; before it actually burned down, the fire was being exacerbated by the mountains of junk held inside. In a call with [[Alec Benson Leary]], when this conundrum is pointed out to Chris, he desperately mashed the buttons on his phone and hung up to try and get out of explaining himself.<ref>[[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 8]], 7:18 in</ref>

===Chris hates chores===
[[Image:Chrisgarden.jpg|thumb|right|Chris tries convincing his dead dog to finish his yardwork for him.]]

Chris spends a lot of time trying to avoid doing what he is so proud of. Barbara constantly got Chris to do things for her. This sometimes dragged him away from his [[Chris and the Internet|friends]], [[Sweetheart|love life]] and [[Sonic Boom Protests|other business]]. He has also hidden out at [[Charlottesville Fashion Square|the mall]] for hours, just so his mother's demands that he do a "hefty chore" wouldn't disrupt his [[Chris and art|creative genius]].<ref>[[Katie Bay E-mails 3]]</ref>

He also blamed Barb for the Chandler household being so messy in the first place. His usual go-to excuse for the state of the house was to call her a "pack rat", even having the balls to [[Chris and hypocrisy|call her lazy]] for not cleaning anything up. Barbara apparently left junk lying all over the house, but Chris would rather go days [[HairDifference|without showering]] than figure out how to move some of Barbara's junk to another room, claiming he "doesn't know what to do" with any of it. His room itself was extremely messy, with it being filled with thousands of [[Lego]]s and toys that he refused to throw out.

Chris's parents also made him pay the family's bills, possibly as an attempt to make him feel like a real adult. Chris, of course, complained about having to give up a large percentage of his "[[tugboat]]" for these bills. He put off paying them for as long as possible so he could use his hard-earned money for [[Sex toys|more important necessities]]. In one of her [[Mumble_2#People_Love_Poketunes|rare Mumble appearances]], Chris lied to Barbara about paying the bills for that month, at first whining that he was being "[[Honest Content|honest]]", but eventually gave in to the fear of being punished by his mother and admitted he did not pay ALL of them. But, he will "be sure to pay the remaining differences next month"!

{{quote|I move stuff around, I take the vacuum cleaner, I vacuum, I scrub the floors [[ShowerClean|with 409 and paper towels]]. It's really hard work. Back-breaking!|[[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 8|Chris explains why he hasn't had time to work on his comic]]}}

In 2020, Chris said that he and Barb both did equal amounts of chores, despite Barb being aged nearly 80.<ref>[[Discord Q&A 11]]</ref>

==See also==
*[[Chris and business]]
*[[Chris and money]]
*[[Chris and stress]]
*[[Chris's resume|Chris's résumé]]
*[[Dimensions]]
*[[Manajerks]]
*[[Monthly tugboat]]

==References==
<references/>
{{Articleofthenow}}
{{Chris and}}
{{Fantasies}}

[[Category:Articles with Jail Saga speculation]]
[[Category:Things Chris hates]]

CWC-isms

2025-05-24T23:25:45Z

Anemichu: /* # */ Italicized sonichu the comic

<center>{{Honest}}</center>

{{Protip|Please refrain from using CWC-isms casually when writing articles, as this may make them difficult for newcomers to decipher.}}
One of [[Chris]]'s most notorious features is his strange '''vocabulary''', consisting of a mix of fairly standard words, slang, jargon, and various personal coinages.

Some of these coinages originate from a degree of prudery, likely inherited from his older parents and maintained by his childlike nature. Like many children who don't feel comfortable referring to [[Honest Content|adult concepts]] directly, Chris often resorts to creating cutesy euphemisms for a lot of words that anyone else his age would generally use with little reservation, which is common with autistic people. While some of them are understandable — after all, nobody would really relish discussing their [[Butt garments|diapers]] — others, such as "[[tobacky]]" instead of "tobacco", only serve to turn an otherwise normal sentence into an advertisement for Chris's childish nature.

Others are attempts to be clever that fail miserably, for example, he refers to [[semen]] as "[[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009|navy]]", because semen sounds like sea men, [[Random-access humor|get it?]] Still others come from Chris's love of manipulating words, especially backwards spellings, {{w|portmanteau}} blends, “verbing” nouns, or liberal use of suffixes like “- ish” or “-er”. Combine this with the idiosyncratic speech patterns that are common among [[autism|autistics]] (likely since standard language may seem inefficient to explain their thought processes), and you get his so-called '''CWC-isms'''.

CWC-isms may be combinations or butchered versions of words or phrases that already exist, entirely new words, commonplace words that he uses repeatedly in a peculiar or obsessive way, or entirely new phrases that Chris often has to explain afterwards because nobody knows what he's talking about.

==Primary categories of CWC-isms==
Nearly all CWC-isms belong to one of the four following classes:
# '''CWC-neologism''' - a ''new'' word or phrase, unknown until ''created by Chris''. Example: ''[[CWC-isms#L|Lovehogs]]'', a portmanteau of "love" and "hedgehogs".
# '''CWC-homonym''' - an ''existing'' word or phrase, to which Chris has given a ''different meaning''. These may be euphemisms, designed to avoid naming (to Chris) offensive things, or else due to Chris confusing an elevated word's meaning. Example: ''[[Duck]]'', for Chris's penis; ''[[CWC-isms#T|telekinesis]]'', used erroneously in place of ''telepathy''.
# '''CWC-archaism''' - an ''obscure'' word or phrase, known in English but seldom used by contemporary Virginians, which Chris has learned somewhere and has ''become characteristic'' for Chris's way of speaking/writing. Example: ''[[CWC-isms#U|Uncouth]]'', a word now rarely used outside the context of formal etiquette, which Chris used to tell people how much of a jerk he perceive they're being to him.
# '''CWC-misspelling''' - only the ''most notable'' of Chris's ''misspellings'', including deliberate re-arrangements: those which are characteristic for Chris's way of writing. Example: ''[[Geinus]]'', what he deems himself to be; ''[[Pmurt]]'' for Donald Trump, 45th and 47th president of the United States. Chris's sporadic, inconsistent use of some [[Catherine|British spellings]] while otherwise using American English can also be considered under this category.



__NOTOC__

<div style="position:fixed; bottom:0; center:0">{{Alphabet ToC}}</div>

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

==#==
|-
|

;12-9
[[Image:Sonichu 12-9 Cover.jpg|The cover for Sonichu #12-9|thumb|200px]]

<blockquote>
1. ''(numeral)'' A placeholder for the number thirteen.

<blockquote> ''There are no quotes that cite the use of this CWC-ism directly. Chris however used it in lists that exceed 12 items.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/1006915844016869377</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris has shown on a few occasions to dislike the number 13, due to him deeming it an unlucky number. This phenomenon, referred to as [[wikipedia:Triskaidekaphobia|triskaidekaphobia]], is already a popular superstition in American culture, and this is likely where Chris picked it up. His fear of the number has led to some bizarre effects, particularly in his numbering. A famous example of this unusual numbering shtick is in the 13th issue of his Sonichu comics, which he numbered as "Issue #12-9", in which he used an em-dash in the place of a decimal place. The 12-9 itself is meant to represent a value of "almost 13".</blockquote>

;15 minutes
[[File:15 minutes.jpg|thumb|200px|"It takes me fifteen f-yay minutes"]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' [[Masturbation]], the amount of time it takes for Chris.

<blockquote> ''Masturbation takes '''Fifteen LONG, Tiring and Annoying Minutes'''''<ref name=15min>[[Masturbation discussions]]</ref></blockquote>
<blockquote> ''Self-masturbation is really arduous and annoying. Another '''15 minutes''' down the drain.''<ref name=15min></ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris coined this phrase in 2021, using it in chats with the [[Watchmen]] and in the [[Workaholics Anonymous comic]].</blockquote>

;[[4-cent_garbage.com|4-Cent Garbage]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' The headquarters of [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] and [[4-Chan]] trolls in ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]''.

<blockquote> ''You will recognize her [?] as your sweetheart because from a fav- from a favor on her half, your internal clock will be restored fully, your enemies of '''4-cent-garbage''' will be vanquished, so you both will live together in peace. Live freely.''<ref>[[Sonichu 9 Official Videobook]]</ref></blockquote>
Origin: Since ED and 4chan were partly responsible for Megan's breakup with him, Chris decided to get payback on the both of them by combining the both of them into an evil corporation in Sonichu, dubbing it "4-cent Garbage".</blockquote>

;7-incher
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' A penis which measures seven-inches in length.

<blockquote> ''Good thing we stopped for a pack of condoms; it's too bad the regular-size ones break easily on my '''7-incher'''.''</blockquote>

Origin: According to Chris, his penis is about 7 inches, which he actually believes is the average length of a penis of an adult male <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_20#Oral_doesn.27t_count</ref>. Chris has made all kinds of weird euphemisms for just his penis alone such as this one, "ugly growth", and "duck".</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

==A==
|-
|
;abreast
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' full of; filled with.

<blockquote>''It was not until after saving the city from the forces of Count Graduon and his minions, that she realized her form's new assets. And she was '''abreast''' with delight and glee when she found not the Male Part, but a Vagina!''<ref>[[May 2015 Facebook posts]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''In fact, while I am fairly educated about Tribadism and '''abreast''' with theories, I would appreciate some experience with a lesbian or two who knows what she likes to enlighten me better, including on sensual massage and all that.''<ref>[[May_2015_Facebook_posts]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris uses this word when discussing feminine anatomy and lesbian sex, evidently because it includes the word "breast". He fails to realize that "abreast" actually means "adjacent" or "across".<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/abreast</ref> A possible confusion with the word "abound" or "abundant".</blockquote>

;Adult Swim
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' pornographic or otherwise "NSFW"; containing [[Honest Content|adult content]].

<blockquote>''She still has a great drawing style, even for the '''Adult Swim''' section."<ref>[[CWCSonichu-NightStar2891 DMs]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Refers to the Cartoon Network block ''[[Adult Swim]]''. Chris seemed to only consider the "Adult" part of this block's name, and therefore assumed he could use this phrase to describe anything that's "adult" to him. Note that the Cartoon Network block does not feature pornographic content.

</blockquote>

;adulterous
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' Of an [[Christian Weston Chandler's Adult Chronicles|adult]] and mature nature

<blockquote>''Originally it was supposed to be like, you know, like ages 7 and up, but then I end up going to the content, uh, it could be considered, be like, be like definitely be considered '''adulterous'''.''<ref>[[Lars Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: usually used to describe people who [[Ivy|cheat]] on their [[Blanca Weiss|partners]] (i.e. guilty of adultery), Chris only notices the "adult" component of the word.

2. ''(adjective)'' Insult of unclear nature
<blockquote>''Heeeeey, folks! It's me, [[Clyde Cash]]. I am the ruler of the internet and the internet trolls. I am an '''adulterous''' foe, a bastard and a self-righteous idiot who spends his time wallowing and trolling the one Christian Weston Chandler, and making up a whole bunch of dadgum rumors all over the internet!''<ref>[[100 2267]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris simply throws out the insult without a clear understanding of the word. Possibly referring to Clyde taking [[PandaHalo]] from Chris, though this is more aptly described as cuckoldry than adultery. Perhaps influenced by the verb ''adulterate''.

</blockquote>

;among which
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' Among other things. Et cetera. Also. Additionally

<blockquote>'''''Among which''' I can project myself to (the Ninja Turtles universe)''<ref>[[Dankula]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: [[Autism|Uncertain]]. Chris adopted this phrase and began using it heavily in a number of different contexts through-out 2018. Perhaps the clearest example of chris's over-use of "among which" is the [[Dankula|Count Dankula interview]], where Chris uses the phrase no less than ten times.

</blockquote>

;an' anurr thing
<blockquote>
1. ''(Phrase, transitionary)'' Signifies that Chris wishes to make another point about a subject he is discussing, and that he wishes he were Peter Falk.

<blockquote>''An' anurr thing...CHRIS. Your for real- your real name, as I have been told by Kacey, is only Chris Chandler! No "-tian," no "-topher," just Chris! So, admit that. '''An' anurr thing''', I NAME is NOT IAN! BRANDON!!! SOMETHING!!!!!''<ref>[[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: a corruption of "and another thing". Used constantly when Chris is angry.

</blockquote>
;[[Anaxis bird]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' Signifies that [[Anaxis]] was meant to be a messenger for the information that Chris requested he put in ''A Medium's Guidance''.

<blockquote>
''Perhaps you all may have heard how I came onto this from an '''Anaxis bird'''.''<ref>[[User:Anaxis/Watchmen Source Leaks#"Anaxis Bird"]]</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: A mangling of the phrase "a little birdie told me", indicating that an anonymous source gave someone a piece of secret information. Because of Chris's misuse of the phrase, the other Watchmen present had come to believe that Anaxis was influencing Chris to write both the [[Affirmations List]] and the [[Lovers Attributes List]].</blockquote>

;[[Anchuent Prophecy|anchuent]]
[[Image:Anch.PNG|right|thumb|Chris and Sonichu amazed by the Anchuent Prophecy]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' Describes anything that is archaic in the ''Sonichu'' canon.

<blockquote>
''Well, what's this? I'm havin' an upgrade? Huh! Huh! My- my powers are given me the ability to fly with my wings attached to my head! It's like a w- it's like an add-on! That's optional! Huh! Must have been done by '''Anchuent''' Powers, so awesome I can fly now! Huh!''<ref>[[Sonichu_3_Official_Videobook]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Initially, "anchuent" was taken to be a misspelling of the word "ancient" given Chris's [[Chris and English|poor grasp of the English language]]. Over time, however, it was revealed that "anchuent" was meant to be a portmanteau of the words "ancient" and "Sonichu", adding the "chu" part of "Sonichu" into the word "ancient".<ref>[[Sonichu_3_Official_Videobook]]</ref> </blockquote>

;and shit
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' And additional items.

<blockquote>''I don't want to believe in labels at all but I mean obviously, tale- the incest fanfics have come true '''and shit'''.''<ref>[[Incest call]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''But, yeah, I did not verbally argue as much growing up, and it took facing the even Toughter Moments since 2000 '''and shit''' for me to actually formulate and speak better self-defenses with what is Truth''<ref>[[Jail Letter - 20 October 2021#22 October]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A more profane variant of "and such" (see below). Chris often uses the phrase in unfitting contexts. He may have picked it up from [[Lars]]'s constant usage of the phrase during the 2010 [[Lars Call]].
</blockquote>

;and such
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' And additional items; to add to a list.

<blockquote>''At least to give you all, my patient, loyal Fans and Trolls, something to quell your pallets until Official Merchandise is sold in Official Stores such as Toys 'R' Us, GameStop, Best Buy, Wal-Mart, etcetera '''and such'''.''<ref>[[CWC Blog|Cwcipedia captain's log, 25 November 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris understands the term's meaning, but uses it superfluously.
</blockquote>

;anthropological
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' human-like, anthropomorphic.

<blockquote>''In dressing myself for the burial work, I saw Snoopy had merged with his '''anthropological''' self-counterpart on the C-197 half of the veil.''<ref>[[July 2021 social media posts#Eulogy for Snoopy]]</ref></blockquote>
</blockquote>

;artery

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' art.

<blockquote>''Good evening, but between this and the, uh, oh, and the other clips I would like to present you, uh, a few examples of hand '''artery'''.''<ref>[[CWC - Hand Drawn Original]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Not to be confused with the term for blood vessels. Chris doesn't seem to realize "art" is already a noun and doesn't need the suffix, and that "artistry" also exists.
</blockquote>

;as such

<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' In the manner previously described.

<blockquote>''They just hated me because they don't, they did not understand people with autism. And so they tortured me '''as such'''.''<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris overuses this phrase to the point of self-parody. He's either tacking it on to fill space when he can't think of the next thing to say, or he's peppering it into his language in a feeble attempt to sound intelligent.
</blockquote>

;ass burgers

<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' [[Asperger's Syndrome]]

<blockquote> ''There are no quotes that cite the use of this CWC-ism directly, as Chris instead alludes to it as "a bad cut of cow meat".</blockquote>

Origin: Since the CWCipedia Saga, Chris has been noted for disliking Asperger's Syndrome, viewing it as something that makes autistic people look bad due to the term vaguely sounding like "ass burgers". Chris has alternatively suggested the term can also sound like "something that can be picked nasally", aka "ass boogers".
</blockquote>

;ass manager
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Either a misspelling or a derogatory term for "assistant manager," based on the abbreviation "ass. manager."

<blockquote>''I did not learn until much later that the spritz had done a lot worse than I had imagined it would, as well as learning that they were the so-called "Manager" and "Ass Manager" of that particular store.''<ref>[[December 2014 Facebook Posts#Shit, Meet Fan]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris has only used this term once, when referring to the [[Yellow-Shirted Foe]]. It's unclear if this was a misspelling or [[Manajerk|yet]] [[Jerkop|another]] childish insult based on someone's job title.</blockquote>

;[[Attraction Location|attraction location]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any place Chris may sit to gain the attention of any passing women, only to get promptly kicked out afterward.

<blockquote>''Also, as of early November, I was reemitted into the Fashion Square Shopping Center, and since Mid-December, I totally left the UVA as an '''Attraction Location'''.''<ref>[[Story_of_My_Current_Days]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, having a very difficult socializing with women, thought that sitting around in a certain place and soliciting himself would be a better alternative. Therefore, it would make sense to him to sit in a location with many people in order to gain the attention of several women.</blockquote>

;attraction time

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The time that is spent at an attraction location

<blockquote>''Then, on my next visit to the mall, I felt seriously depressed about what had happened the other day; it killed my '''attraction time'''''.<ref>[[Story_of_My_Current_Days]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;audio-sonic feeling

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the arousing feeling caused by getting hit by sound waves

<blockquote>''Here is a most '''audio-sonic feeling'''. While at the club last night, the [[Chris and music|music]] was loud, maybe reverberating or echoing. The music and beats literally shook up my rack! I actually Felt the music playing and reverbing within my breasts, almost like my breasts had become a pair of speakers. It Felt Amazing and Arousing!''<ref>https://www.facebook.com/cwcville/photos/a.447204945915.244245.167832525915/10152771303590916/?type=3&theater</ref></blockquote>

Origin: As shown in the quote above, Chris believed that he was sexually aroused when sound waves hit him. In actuality, sound, a vibration,<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sound</ref> creates pressure. The louder the sound, the more pressure gets created from the wave. Therefore, very loud music should be able to hit Chris given that he's a [[obesity|huge target]], creating that "arousing" feeling, which is actually an alternation between high and low pressures.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== B ==
|-
|

;B-dog
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Derogatory epithet for women.

<blockquote>''Then that [[Mary Lee Walsh|'''B-Dog''']] ripped up my notes and all, dragged me to her quarters and talked down to me very RUDELY AND HOARSELY.''<ref>[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Childish censorship of the word "bitch"; bitch also meaning "female dog". [[Bubbles Rosechu]] is implied to say this in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], when she shouts "BEEE..!!!" at [[Silvana]].<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_8/Page_95|Issue 8 Pages 94-95}}</ref>
</blockquote>

;bally
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' round; having the texture of a perfectly round ball.

<blockquote>''I've always given her a "'''Bally'''-Scratch" where I stroke her head with all five fingers like as if I was gently squeezing a rubber ball.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_emails_2004-2006</ref></blockquote>

Origin: If one didn't know Chris was referring to his dog, Patti, and that he gives her a "Bally-scratch" on the head, one might conclude that he's fondling someone's genitals. Chris, [[CWC-isms#N|naive]] to how suggestive this sounds, gave this special kind of petting the name "Bally-scratching" because of how stroking her head felt like he was squeezing a rubber ball.</blockquote>

;Be Woman
<blockquote>1. ''(verb phrase)'' Be '''a''' woman.

<blockquote>''I am a Lesbian Transwoman; I am not confused or mentally ill about that; '''I Am Woman.'''''<ref>[[2017_tweets#Proud_to_be_a_feminist]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''How Dare You Insult and be so Inconsiderate of Her like that? '''She Is Woman'''; she would Never Revert Back.''<ref>[[NightStar2891_tweets#She_is_woman]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used regularly when Chris asserts his [[Tomgirl|transgender identity]], notable for the consistent lack of a proper article and capitalization of each word in the phrase. Originally only attested in the first person ("I Am Woman"), a post on Chris's [[Miss Night Star]] Twitter sockpuppet account uses the third person ("She Is Woman"). Technically first appears in [[Sonichu 8]] when [[The Incredible Lioness]] attacks [[Jason Kendrick Howell]], as the somewhat cliché musical reference [[wikipedia:I Am Woman|"I am woman, hear me roar!"]], which may have inspired Chris's broader use of the phrase. This could be a reference to the Bhagavad Gita or Oppenheimer ("Now I am become death, destroyer of worlds.") [[honor roll|but this is unlikely]].
</blockquote>



;[[Biological clock|biological clock]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[Wikipedia:Circadian Rhythm|circadian rhythm]]

<blockquote>'''I have a lot of stored caffeene [sic] in my energy supply, and not only kept me on my toes, but has also messed up my fucking '''biological clock''' as well.''<ref>[[Biological clock]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Although technically not used incorrectly in this context, the phrase "biological clock" is used exclusively for women in their child-bearing years. Possibly a confusion with "internal clock".
</blockquote>

;blangry
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' [[Chris and anger|Angry]].

<blockquote>''Oh, and how 'bout this?! I get '''BLANGRY'''! ''<ref>[[Chris Calls Clyde Out]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Given Chris's belief that he has [[Chris and English|mastered the English language]] and his [[speech impediment]], it's likely he meant to say angry.
</blockquote>

;blue-printed
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Skilled in engineering.

<blockquote>''I like many others, was born a foal; to a '''blue-printed''' Pegasus and a country tomboy earth mare.''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/attachments/screenshot_20171019-235945_01-png.299275/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris portrayed Bob's Pony Counterpart in [[Sonichu 12-9|''Sonichu'' #12-9]] as an engineer, just like the real [[Bob Chandler|Bob]]. Due to Chris's limited vocabulary, Chris knew very little words he could use to describe Bob's profession. Derived from the word "blueprints", the plans set for the design of a product. </blockquote>

;[[Boyfriend-free girl|boyfriend-free]]

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Single; particularly used on women.

<blockquote>''Ahh, well, it's been over a year and ten months now since I started my sweetheart-search; I still haven't found a '''boyfriend-free'''-caring-smoke-free-non-alcoholic-white-girl-near-my-age to build a relationship with from the ground up.''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris’s mission in life used to be to obtain a girlfriend and have sex. However, every chance he thinks he gets, they already have a boyfriend. This has made Chris “fear” girls who already have boyfriends.</blockquote>

;Buddha belly
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Excess fat that gives a person a [[obesity|very round appearance]].

<blockquote>''Okay, well, I admit I do have a '''Buddha belly''', but I am not lazy, I do get out and about, I exercise, I jog and work out, and I eat healthy.''<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: "[[Wikipedia:Buddha|Buddha]]" is a title given to several legendary figures in [[Wikipedia:Buddhism|Buddhism]]. In this case, Chris is making reference to [[wikipedia:Budai|Budai]], who is often known as "Fat Buddha". Chris presumably picked up the phrase from the ''[[Family Guy]]'' episode "To Love and Die in Dixie".
</blockquote>

;bugbears
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[Trolls]], [[weens]], and other Chris-related orbiters who make him miserable.

<blockquote>''Freaking CyberBullies!!!!!!! Real '''Bugbears''', they are!''<ref>[[Apologies to the liked Bronies and Pegasisters; PLEASE UNBLOCK ME ON TWITTER!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Although the term was originally defined in the 16th century as 'a cause of obsessive fear, anxiety, or irritation.', It was given a another definition centuries later to describe a race of hobgoblins made famous by [[Wikipedia:Bugbear (Dungeons & Dragons)|Dungeons & Dragons]]. It's widely believed that Chris picked up the term from [[My Little Pony]]: Friendship is Magic, which depicted these creatures as literal bear-insect hybrids that are first seen terrorizing the ponies.
</blockquote>

;buh bye bay nose
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' but if anybody knows.

<blockquote>''If I knew who you were, I'd give you a kick in da bawls. But I can't, because I don't know who or where you are. '''Buh bye bay nose''' the whereabouts of the... [[JERKS|jerk]]... and just happens to be nearby... or within the state? Give him a swick kick for me.''<ref>[[Christian's Update 13 September 2008]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A result of Chris’s [[speech impediment]]</blockquote>

</blockquote>
;but during the stone age...
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A rebuttal for something obvious being stated.

<blockquote>''You don’t have to tell me twice! '''But during the stone age...'''''<ref>[[Sonichu 2]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: According to the [[Sonichu 2 Official Videobook|Videobook for Sonichu #2]], the phrase originates from how you need to “tell cavemen twice” over anyone else.</blockquote>

;[[Butt garments|butt garment]]
[[Image:Ecp00065.jpg|thumb|Leaked footage of Chris in a butt garment]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' an adult diaper; typically one used to control Chris's [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|fecal incontenence]].

<blockquote>''The doctor corrected that they were liners; he never called them diapers. Neither did Chris- he called them “'''butt garments'''”.''</blockquote>

Origin: To avoid embarrassment from stating that he shits himself constantly, and uses diapers, Chris refers to his adult diapers as butt garments.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== C ==
|-
|

;C-Log
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' Captain's Log.

<blockquote>'''''C-Log''' February 4th, 2010. First off, I'm not dead, and I have a few announcements to make.''<ref>[[I am Alive]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: For quite some time, Chris has had the habit of abbreviating certain words or phrases that begin with "'''C'''", possibly for [[Chris and his Ego|his name also beginning with "'''C'''"]], as well as to put greater emphasis on the letter C in the words he abbreviates. Other examples of this kind of abbreviation include "C-Mas" and "C-Ville".
</blockquote>

;C-Mas
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' Christmas

<blockquote> ''The [[Christmas]] season is upon us, and with that comes the rush for the '''C-Mas''' Turkey, Tree (real or artificial), and of course, the presents. So, Sonichu and the News Dash have some helpful tips to give a better feel of the season to all.<ref>[[Sonichu's_News_Dash#A_Very_Special_Holiday_Chris-chan]]
</ref>''</blockquote>

Origin: See ''C-Log''.
</blockquote>

;C Ville (or C-Ville)
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' [[Charlottesville, VA]].

<blockquote>''Look, you're going to back in '''C-Ville''' tomorrow, I can meet you at the McDonalds at Forest Lakes, what time is good for our meeting?''<ref>[[Vanessa AIM Chat 3]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Generic term for any city whose name fits the pattern of beginning with "C" and ending with "ville," e.g., [[CWCville]], Charlottesville, etc.

<blockquote>''And when you diss Cwcville you disf- you diss every "'''C Ville'''" within these United States.''<ref>[[Do Not Dis C Ville]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: See ''C-Log''.
</blockquote>

;[[Captain's Log|Captain's Log]]
[[File:CWCtrek1.png|400px|right|thumb|The Autistic Generation]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' The classic opening for a vlog video Chris makes to adress the fanbase, which includes the date of production. Replaced in 2015 with "live from home once again".

<blockquote>'''''Captain's Log'''. Stardate: September... 24th, 2008.''<ref>[[Chris Chan Update 24 September 2008]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: One may come to the conclusion that Chris picked up this phrase from Star Trek, however, Chris is neither a fan of the Star Trek franchise, nor has he seen any clips of the show<ref>[[Mailbag_3]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag_14]]</ref>. It is more likely that Chris picked up the phrase from cartoons like [[Family Guy]], which references Star Trek, considering how much he watched the show religiously.</blockquote>

;carniverous
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' evil, vengeful.

<blockquote>''On today's show, we will take a close-up look at the '''carniverous''' jerkops.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComic5P29.htm</ref></blockquote>Origin: A misspelling of "carnivorous". It is unknown what word Chris meant to use here, but "carnivorous" certainly wasn't it.</blockquote>

;[[China|china]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Female genitalia

<blockquote>''I love dykes! DYKES! '''CHINA!'''''<ref>[[CWC's_Second_Message]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, uncomfortable with directly saying the word "vagina", decided to alter the word to a cutesy, similar-sounding word. Based off of a term for porcelain "china".</blockquote>

;coldest shoulder

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' to rebel.

<blockquote>''Those people like me at the very least, NOT counting all of the deceitful people I have had the displeasure of knowing who turned '''Coldest Shoulder''' Against me and STARTED all of the Online Hatred.''<ref>[[April_2012_Facebook_posts]]</ref>

''One of which, Amanda, is one of the Part-Time Manajerks who gives her elders the '''coldest of shoulders'''.''<ref>[[Coffee Place]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A misuse of the phrase "turning a cold shoulder", a phrase used for the negligence of another person<ref>https://www.collinsdictionary.com/us/dictionary/english/turn-a-cold-shoulder-to</ref>. </blockquote>

;Come Adore
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A sermon from Chris's religion.
<blockquote>''That's all for now. Be safe and well.

Mrs. Jesus Christine Chan Sonichu.

Commodore Come Adore<ref>[[Jail Letter - 27 June 2022]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Yet another retarded pun from Chris, specifically based on the [[Commodore 64]].
</blockquote>

;[[Comeuppance|comeuppance]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Male orgasm.
<blockquote>''...I feel my '''comeuppance''' and I come into your mouth, my [[semen]] is inside your mouth and you'd swallow every drop. (...) And right after I'd given you my first round, my first '''comeuppance''', you would take, you would reach down, and you would take your face away from my penis...''<ref>[[Chris Sex Logs]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' [[Semen]], usually immediately after ejaculation. ''See also: [[CWC-isms#N|Navy]]''
<blockquote>''Yeah, and I'm just gonna keep bangin' your breasts over and over again until you get the first dosage of my '''comeuppance'''!''<ref>[[Kacey Phone Call]]</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: Chris uses the sexual slang "cum" as a [[For Julie's Eyes Only|verb]] for orgasm, but he may not realize it can also be a noun referring to ejaculate. In his mind, "comeuppance" apparently serves that purpose, viz., "that which has come/cum up."

In the real world, "comeuppance" is an English noun meaning [[Wiktionary:comeuppance|outcome which is justly deserved]] based upon the common verb "come," i.e., the state of coming forward to receive judgment. He is either unaware of the original definition of the word or does not appreciate the irony of telling women he's going to give them comeuppance.

Note that the contexts of the real word and Chris's version are different. When a woman is rebuked, she receives her comeuppance; when a woman gets Chris's hot load in her face, she receives ''his'' "comeuppance."
</blockquote>

;count you(r) blessing(s)
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used as a retort when someone complains about the quality of your work.
<blockquote>It’s an early thing; it will improve later on. Curb your enthusiasm and '''count your blessing.'''</blockquote>
Origin: In [[January 2020]] Chris was seen using the phrase when he was attacked after chimping out about being blocked on social media. Recently people have been questioning the quality of the newest [[medallions]], produced by [[Praetor]]. Chris, perhaps in an attempt to "calm the trolls down'' tells them to '''count their blessings''.</blockquote>

;crash into slumber (or crash and burn)
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To get so sad and [[Chris and stress|stressed out]] that you get tired from exhaustion.

<blockquote>And… the void in my heart that requires a sweetheart is open again, and it hurts. I hope you jerks and trolls who wanted to break us up… are happy… 'cause all you did was make me feel sad and depressed. And you made me '''crash… into slumber'''… a couple of times. And you know, it takes a lot of stress and exhaust… and such… to make a person feel like they're gonna crash and burn… into a whole bunch of s-- into a long slumber… that just basically sleeps o-- that just basically sleeps off the—uh, what's the word I was looking for? I had it. Ugh…<ref>[[Chris Chan Update 21 October 2008]]
</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris famously said that he "crashed into slumber" in the video [[Chris Chan Update 21 October 2008]], where he shows off how depressed and angry he was with his latest tomfoolery at the time. It could be because that one of Chris' main methods of coping with his stress is to sleep it off, and tried to make it sound hyperbolic by stating that he "crashed" onto the bed, as if he tried to get it done sooner.</blockquote>

;crestfallen
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Sad and disappointed

<blockquote>''I should have been Highly Recognized for my ARTISTIC TALENTS I showed in my Many Art Classes for the Award Ceremonies before Graduation Day. I felt '''crestfallen''' greatly from not getting recognized for any of my Talents. I EXCELLED IN MATH TOO FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Manchester_High_School</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I also HAD Hidden ALL of the Blue Armed Sonic Toys at Toys R Us here, concealed hidden amongst their metal cupboards, so they ALL would NOT be SOLD, and Best Boycotted for The Protest! They remained hidden for the longest time of over a Month; found and reshelved near the 20th of December to my personal dismay and '''crestfall'''. And at Best Buy, ALL Copies of THEIR Sonic Boom Games are STILL SUCCESSFULLY CONCEALED AND HIDDEN from View AND Purchase!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/26_December_2014</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Another obscure word Chris liked to use a lot, even today. It even got to the point where he tried to put it into a baffling progressive tense "to my dismay and crestfall".</blockquote>

;crooks
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Those who may steal Chris's intellectual property for malicious purposes. ''(pl.)''

<blockquote>''I aways keep my eyes open for '''crooks''' who take my [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]]'s name and put it in offensive use!''<ref>''[[:File:116-CWCCop.jpg|116-CWCCop.jpg]]''</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' websites, and even words on websites which communicate lies about Chris.

<blockquote>''And that [[ED]] page is one of those crooks. Every page--every word on the discussion page is a '''crook'''.''<ref>[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A finishing move Chris does on his adversaries in order to "curse" them, publicly or otherwise.

<blockquote>''Hmmm...'''Curse-ye-ha-me-HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/NO_D***_WAY,_IMPOSTOR!!!</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A reference to the Kamehameha energy attack from the [[Dragon Ball]] series, performed in the same way it is in the anime. Chris believes that he possesses [[Chris and reality#Magic|magical powers]]. Typically, these so-called magical powers would be used whenever an enemy gets in the way of whatever he wants to do, since Chris is too afraid to actually fight anyone. Therefore, he will rely on this magical power in order to gain control of whoever is giving him trouble.</blockquote>

;CWC-sense
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The ability to sense Chris's presence.

<blockquote> ''Seriously though, awesome timing coming in, just as we, and Chris, had just finished writing the lyrics...was your '''CWC-sense''' tingling?''<ref>https://www.patreon.com/posts/15092809</ref></blockquote></blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== D ==
|-
|

;D.A.
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation)'' Unexplained, presumably a substitution to avoid the word "dumbass." Most likely ''not'' "District Attorney," although equally applicable to [[Marvey Blaziken]].

<blockquote>''You are obviously a troll trying to pick on my nerves; nice try, '''D.A.'''''<ref>[[Mailbag 15]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris intermittently decides to self-censor his profanities for the benefit of younger readers.
</blockquote>

;da
<blockquote>1. ''(article)'' [[Wikipedia:Eye dialect|Eye dialect]] spelling of the word [http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/the the].

<blockquote>''Y'all know me as [[DJ Jamsta|Jamsta Sonichu]], '''da''' DJ with da power!''<ref>[[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], page 43</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris writes "the" as "da" when he intends for his characters (or himself) to sound laid-back and cool. This is most notable with Jamsta Sonichu, who is supposed to sound like a hip radio DJ and/or a [[Niggos|Jamaican man]]. Chris may intend at times to do the same thing in his verbal communications, although his [[speech impediment]] makes it difficult to tell when he actually means to say "da."
</blockquote>

;Da Update
[[File:Daupdate.jpg|thumb|400px|[[Megan]], comparing Chris's [[Chris and his Ego|attitude]] to [[Dragon Ball Z|Goku]].]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' The latest news.

2. ''(phrase)'' The most recent fail Chris is responsible for.

<blockquote>''Hey, guys! What's '''da update'''?''</blockquote>

Origin: Dialogue used by Chris, in an exceedingly awkward attempt to sound casual, in the pages of [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]. As Chris's [[fans]] have searched the Internet for the latest news from our hero, "da update" has become shorthand for "the latest [[Relics of Fail|failure]] Chris has committed." The phrase became legendary when posted above the Chris-chan talk page on [[ED]] (eventually the page was locked, forcing mass migration to the [[PVCC (message board)|PVCC]]).

</blockquote>

;[[Darling|darling]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A potential lover, even one that shows no affection back at you.

<blockquote>''Thank you, Doopie '''Darling'''. :)<ref>[[July 2017 tweets#Thanks, darling]]</ref>''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris, so hellbent on being [[Chris and kindness|kind]] to just about any potential sweetheart he met, thinks it's appropriate to refer to women he doesn't know outside of the internet by pet names to sound like he really cares for them, despite it being creepy to most other people. Chris's main justification for using this word on women who don't bond with him is that the actor [[Wikipedia:Tallulah Bankhead|Tallulah Bankhead]] used this word a lot, ignoring the fact that she only did this while on set.</blockquote>

;[[Dating education|Dating Education]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' formal education in schools about dating people of the opposite sex.

<blockquote>''Also, in addition, while we also fully support Sexual Education in every high school, Christian Weston Chandler also highly recommends, and would gladly support, '''Dating Education''' classes, because, while Sex Ed is great for the eventual, well-earned intercourse after 3 or more dates, it is vital to learn what to do before that moment. It should be well0taught how to approach and ask one’s member of the opposite gender out for the very first date.''<ref>[[:File:DatingEducation.jpg]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The lack of "Dating Education classes" is something that Chris used to complain about all of the time, because he's simply incapable of finding a [[CWC-isms#S|sweetheart]], and that it would be a great advantage for people of his type to learn how to do so. Chris doesn't understand that a key aspect of obtaining a mate is to develop the proper [[Chris and socialization|social skills]], especially those around [[women]], and that it has very little to do with how much sex he has with them.</blockquote>

;dementia
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A synonym for Chris's [[autism]].

<blockquote>''My brain is blank and, I definitely wouldn't have realized. Word of the day, Dementia. The umbrella term for all the mentally wearing down people, I got some dementia okay? So give me time, give me space, alright? And some slack.''<ref>[[Live Game Stream - C-Log 04192017 - The Shirt]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;detail
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A thing of importance that Chris cannot recall at any given moment.

<blockquote>''I do not have the appropriate calm state of mind to make time to READ those numerous upon numerous small-print '''details''', much less memorize them.''<ref>[[Wikipedia#May 2009 drama]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

<blockquote>2. ''(noun)'' Something that Chris does not understand.

<blockquote>''There was one I remember from then where the essay had a lot of offensive content, including smoking, and I spoke my mind on how offended I was of it. Plus other details I misunderstood that he was expecting in the assignments.'' <ref>[[Jackie E-mails 9]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's ability to retain information is questionable (unless it's about [[Sonichu (comic)|something]] [[Lego|he]] [[Pokémon|obsesses]] [[PS3|over]]). As such, he "misunderstands" and "forgets" a lot of glaringly important things, such as [[Father call|how to live on his own]] and [[Jackie E-mails 2|the fact that he cheated on Ivy]].
</blockquote>

;devotee
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An [[enabler]] of Chris.

<blockquote>''Ah, I believe I have the proper term. Going from "Worshiper", I checked the thesaurus:"'''Devotee'''" in the term sounds better. "Devotees of Chris Chan Sonichu"(DoCCS). This is my better educates and thought suggestion." ''<ref>[[November 2019 social media posts#Devotees of Chris Chan Sonichu]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Believing himself to be a goddess, Chris needed a term to refer to any of his followers. The term was originally "worshiper", but then after a quick thesaurus search, he decided to change the term to "devotees", solely because he thought it sounded smarter. Although technically a synonym of "worshiper", the term "devotee" is more often used in Eastern religions such as Hinduism and Buddhism.
</blockquote>

;Did the do, to do the do
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To have sexual intercourse, likely under deceptive conditions

<blockquote>''[[Lovely Weather|Lovely]] was hot. She mistook me for myself and we went home from work that night, so Lovely and I '''did the do''', and it was awesome!''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_10/Page_2|Issue 10 Page 2}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An even more benign variation of the common euphemism for sex, "doing it". Likely taken from [[Wikipedia:Emission_Impossible|an episode]] of [[Family Guy]].
</blockquote>

;dige
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Marijuana

<blockquote>''My name's [[Inos]]... wha' chu up to? I am eclectic on this hedge... high on the hog... you wan' som' of this '''dige''', mon?''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Issue_10/Page_70|Issue 10 Page 70}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Intended to be part of a coded reference to "Sonichu, Electric Hedgehog Digimon". It is not known why he changed the reference from "Pokemon" to "Digimon".
</blockquote>

;[[dimension]]
[[File:Chrisminecraft.jpg|right|thumb|In a universe of multiple realities, anything is possible according to Chris.]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Either our universe or a fictional one, such as the one in which ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' or ''[[My Little Pony]]'' are set, both held to be equally [[Chris and reality|real]] in Chris's ontology.

<blockquote>''For Our Home World and All other '''Dimensions''', Realities and Worlds; All Of Us! Dance! Dance! Dance!!!''<ref>[[Freestyle Dance With Me, For Our World]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Dumbing down some physicists' hypothetical notion of other physical universes embedded in mathematically higher-dimensional space, which has since seeped into pop culture and thence down to Chris.
</blockquote>

;[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Used as a reference to Chris's fecal incontinence.

<blockquote>''I have NUMBERS OF PAIRS OF '''DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS'''.''<ref>[[IRC_(20_January_2009)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this phrase during an [[IRC (20 January 2009)|IRC chat]] with [[Clyde Cash]] and [[BILLY MAYS]] after they alleged that Chris has a fondness to wear women's underwear. In order to confirm his straightness, he retorted by admitting the fact that he has "NUMBERS OF PAIRS OF DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS". Soon after, due to how humorous the phrase sounded, it became a shorthand for trolls to refer to Chris's fecal incontinence.</blockquote>

;disabled of crafting
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Too apathetic to work

<blockquote>''Since last December with the Lulu.com problems (resolved), that has left me with a bad emotional and mental scar. Leaving me feeling '''disabled of crafting'''...''<ref>[[August 2016 Facebook posts#Too lazy to work]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris being defensive when a customer asked how he could be trusted to follow through on an order, when he had failed to send out orders from his Etsy shop, which resulted in his seller account getting closed.
</blockquote>

;dispel
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' Reject, turn away

<blockquote>''[T]o dispel me is to discriminate against the LGBTQ community as well.<ref>[[Unban_contracts#GameStop|GameStop unban contract]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A misunderstanding of the meaning of the word.</blockquote>

;Dork of Ages
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Someone who deserves scorn for creating an [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] article on you.

<blockquote>He is the '''Dork of Ages'''. Y'all should be sending every last complaint and hatred towards—rain down upon him. Send him every last email you can. Shower him with as much hate as possible until that Encyclopedia Dramatica page is taken down, [gives a thumbs down] along with him.<ref>[[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used on [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] after he created Chris' Encyclopedia Dramatica page. This phrase was [[List of phrases Chris copied from media|taken]] from the American Dad episode "Dungeons and Wagons", where Hayley called Steve the "Dork of Ages" while he played "Dragon Shuffle".</blockquote>

;Drunk, High Aqua Teenatic
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Backstabber.

<blockquote>''You could be a Better, More Supportive Friend, instead of a '''Drunk, High Aqua Teenatic''' with your sweetheart!!!''<ref>[[October 2017 Facebook posts#Quinn breaks up with Chris again]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A bizarre attempt to turn the title of the Adult Swim cartoon, [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force]] into an insult.</blockquote>

;[[Duck|duck]]
[[Image:BentDuck.jpg|thumb|right|An example of a bent duck]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's penis

<blockquote>''MY '''DUCK''' HUNGERS FOR TOM-TOM TO POUND!!!!!''<ref>[[I_Am_The_TRUE,_Original_CCWC]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Initially "duck" was taken to be a typo of "dick" since the "u" and "i" keys are close together. It was later revealed that Chris was using this neologism as an intentional euphemism to refer to his own penis.<ref>[[Mumble 8]]</ref>

''See also:'' [[CWC-isms#P|pickle]]</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== E ==
|-
|

;elbow-greased
[[Image:Elbow-Greased Strength.jpg|200px|thumb|Chris gets swole]]

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Earned from hard work and exercise

<blockquote>''There are no quotes that cite the use of this CWC-ism. It appears in his [[resume]], where he lists "elbow-greased strength" as one of his "functional skills"''</blockquote>

Origin: A misuse of the idiom, "elbow-grease", a figure of speech humorously used for tasks that involve manual labor only. </blockquote>

;[[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]]''

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any of the characters found in Sonichu which are hybrids of [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] characters and/or Pokemon.

<blockquote>''Since the inspiration and conception of Sonichu, the '''Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon''' on March 17, 2000, I have grown further in his stories, plots and adventures in a series of hand-drawn and computer-edited comic books.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris%27s_resume</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Despite the name, a majority of "Electric Hedgehog Pokemon" are neither Pokemon or hedgehogs. This misnomer may come from Chris's original characters being hybrids of two Sonic characters, both of whom are hedgehogs (Sonic and Amy Rose) and two Pokémon (Pikachu and Raichu).</blockquote>

;emotional differences

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A strong disagreement between two people.

<blockquote>''I told you! It was, it was because of, uh, '''emotional differences.'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call#The_Shit_Hits_the_Fan</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris mentioned that he got terminated from [[Wendy's]] in the [[Father Call]], due to their "emotional differences", possibly meaning that a heated argument between him and his employer ensued.</blockquote>

;empirical
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' resorting to experience to gain knowledge rather than through scientific means.

<blockquote>''So, throw away the book talk; be '''empirical''' and believe what you know is fact'' <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2012_Facebook_posts#Empirical</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris attributed the nearly opposite definition of the word to Jeremy Hilary Boob PhD, a character from [[Wikipedia:Yellow Submarine|''Yellow Submarine'']]. Considering this, Chris must have picked up this strange definition from the content in the Beatles Edition of ''Rock Band''.</blockquote>

;entendre

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Charisma or attraction

<blockquote>''Too much '''entendre'''?''<ref>https://www.patreon.com/posts/15092809</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Derived from the phrase "double entendre", a figure of speech used for words or phrases with a double meaning, typically [[Duck|with]] [[Mass Debating|one]] [[China|of]] [[Recycling|them]] [[Pickle|being]] [[Comeuppance|risque]].<ref>https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/double%20entendre</ref> In English, the word "entendre" isn't typically used outside of the phrase itself, but in many other languages like French and Catalan, it is understood to mean "to hear" or "to understand". Chris, thinking he knows everything there is to know about the English language, once again thought he would sound smart by using this obscure word.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== F ==
|-
|

;[[Fangs|fangs]]
[[File:Showing_Off_Fangs.jpg|thumb|right|200px|How Chris imagined himself when showing off his canines]]
[[File:ChrisCavities.JPG|thumb|right|200px|The reality. The red arrows point to Chris' cavities]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's canine teeth.

<blockquote>''They're called Eye-Teeth, but they feel and look like '''fangs''' of a vampire, dog or something to me.''<ref>[[Sonichu_Girls#Your_understanding_me_fukky_.281_January_2009.29]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I'm not afraid to SHOW MY '''FANGS'''!''<ref>[[CWC_Update_8_January_2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes his teeth to be unordinary compared to most other people's teeth, apparently believing canine teeth are some kind of special trait only a selected few people have. Because he believes his canines to be menacing, he gave them the name "fangs". Once in a while, Chris would show off his decaying teeth to scare his enemies. This usually works, although for the wrong reasons.</blockquote>

;faredoo
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection, imperative verb)'' Parting salutation, akin to "goodbye".

<blockquote>''Vessel of my loneliness for the past three years of anguish. I bid you fond...'''faredoo'''. Adieu. Fond farewell adieu...''<ref>[[The MovingFoward videos]].</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Accidental portmanteau of "farewell" and "adieu".
</blockquote>

;fart-minded

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' dumb and perverted.

<blockquote>Ha Ha! Take THAT, you '''fart-minded''', jerk [[MALE]] among ALL fart-minded, jerk Males that make up the Majority of the Worldwide Male Population! -:D<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivtWQTjXCDs</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in the comment section of a Stopmotion Lego animation, where a ''Lego'' minifigure is in a sexual relationship with a ''Lego Friends'' minifigure. Throughout this video, the Lego minifigure essentially acts how Chris believes most men do. At the end of the video, the male minifigure proceeds to fart, which disgusts the female minifigure. Also a possible butchering of the phrase "brainfart", which is used to humorously refer to a moment of absentmindedness.</blockquote>

;firstly
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' A word that indicates that Chris is about to tell someone why he's right. Often not followed by an enumerated list of reasons, despite the implication.

<blockquote>'''''Firstly''', Aspergers is NOTHING Similar to Autism; Aspergers pertains to MEMORY, Autism is Social Skills. and I'm High-Functionally Autistic''<ref>[[IRC_(02_January_2009)|IRC chat, 02 January 2009]].</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Use of "firstly" to begin a list, rather than "first," is a matter of dispute. While both words exist in the dictionary, "Firstly" has fallen out of common use in speech and tends to sound more formal, perhaps overly so. Chris seems to like this formality, probably because he thinks it sounds smart.
</blockquote>

;fondful
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' fond.

<blockquote>''Faithfully yours with '''fondful''' thoughts; Chris Chan.''<ref>[[Megan Emails, Jan-July 2007|Chris's email to Megan Schroeder]], 06 July 2007</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris apparently doesn't understand that "fond" is already an adjective by itself.
</blockquote>

;for good-like
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' final, but with the imagined possibility otherwise.

<blockquote>''And in June of 2008, he banned me from the store '''for good-like'''.''<ref>[[Wallflower E-mails|Chris's email to The Wallflower]], 18 February 2010</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Confusing modification of "for good".
</blockquote>

;foresee/foretell/foreknow
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To make a wild guess at something occuring, claiming it's a "prediction".

<blockquote>''#Saberspark Is right. This is one reason why I stay clear from certain games and shows. My intuition also senses and '''foresees''' the quality and feel without even having to watch or play it at all''<ref>[[March 20March 2025 social media posts#Brainrot]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(verb)'' To have predicted something that already happened or that someone else claimed would happen, but didn't.

Origin: Chris claims he has the ability to predict the future, an aspect of his divinity. However, Chris only ever makes these claims whenever an event has already happened, claiming he predicted it would, or when he makes a confident guess at the future based purely on his intuition.
</blockquote>

;foundate
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' To dedicate, as in a monument or building.

<blockquote>''I, Christian Weston Chandler, re-'''foundate''' this monument that is the PAGE with MY SOLE HONEST TRUTH from my sound mind and heart.''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|1=Christian_in_his_Own_Words#Captain.27s_Log.2C_Stardate:_June_6.2C_2009|2=Christian in his Own Words}}.</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Likely a portmanteau of "found" and "dedicate", or a bizarre attempt to convert "foundation" into a verb.
</blockquote>

;four-boomerang-shaped symbol
[[File:Fourboom.jpg|thumb|right|"G'Day welcome to Auschwitz"]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' minced oath for "[[Wikipedia:swastika|swastika]]," especially the ''Hakenkreuz'' symbol of the [[Nazis|Nazi]] Party.

<blockquote>''Like Most People, I do not care much for Adolf; he was a terrible man, and even in jest, I WOULD NEVER want to portray him, much less, his '''four-boomerang-shaped symbol''' (I know what it is called, but I do not wish to type the word).''<ref>[[Mailbag 5#That wacky Hitler|Mailbag 5]]
</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris was apparently afraid to say the word "swastika," probably for the same reason he used to [[Niggos|fear using racial slurs]].
</blockquote>

;fourth wall

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A boundary that separates [[Reality Cartoon|reality cartoons]] and [[Dimensions|dimensions]] from dimension C-197.

<blockquote>''Hey, Everyone. I have another announcement for you all to do now, for yourselves and our OCs: Break Your Own '''Fourth Wall'''.
<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1195039493130199041</ref>''</blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' An abstract force that prevents people from talking to their OC's.

<blockquote>Our OCs in C-197 often break their '''fourth walls''', because they are aware of us, and it is our time and turn to return the favour.</blockquote>

Origin: Comes from the phrase "breaking the fourth wall", a figure of speech humorously used on characters that acknowledge the audience directly, or state their awareness of the media they're in. Chris has taken this to mean that all dimensions in the universe are separated by this kind of barrier, therefore calling them "the fourth wall". In a recent Twitter post, Chris has also stated that this mysterious force is the reason why people cannot see or interact with their OC's, but that the OC's themselves are fully aware of their creators, so will eventually break through the barrier every once in a while to speak to people of other dimensions.</blockquote>

;[[Friend Zone|friend zone]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The dreaded moment a sweetheart rejects you.

<blockquote>''A lot of times, especially if the friend in question is opposite of gender 18 or older, they may have sex on the brain. And when that person hears from you that you just want to be friends, or in the other term, put into the '''Friend Zone''', that person will feel like they failed at getting the sex they wanted, or Ever will from you.''<ref>[[August 2017 tweets]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' The lousiest excuse a sweetheart could give for not having sex with Chris.

<blockquote>''Nothing has happened in Women's Rights; the "Friend Zone" is only the LOUSIEST EXCUSE EVER to give to someone the woman deeply cares about and trusts so she could get out of sex or a relationship. I do not take kindly to that Excuse at this time.''<ref>[[Common Questions]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The Friend Zone refers to a relationship where one person desires romance, while the other only shows interest in friendship. Much like his stance on the Three-Date Rule, Chris believed that the Friend Zone is simply another rule explicitly placed on him by some unspecified authority to slow down his progress on completing his [[Love Quest]]. His belief that this is simply an "excuse" to avoid having sex with him reveals a lot on why he was [[Megan|overly-persistent with]] [[Wallflower|some of]] [[Doopie|his sweethearts]]. He couldn't imagine why any woman would not want to have sex with him, so he came to the conclusion that every woman he stalks are simply unfamiliar with sex and what goes into it.</blockquote>

;[[Fuzzy-wuzzies|fuzzy-wuzzies]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The rewards of giving Chris compliments.

<blockquote>''Compliments will get you '''fuzzy-wuzzies'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. Believed to be another example of Chris' random-access humor. May have been derived from an English assignment in [[Manchester High School|high school]], "[[Manchester High Leaks#Warm Fuzzies|Warm Fuzzies for Christian]]".

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#P|prickly-wicklies]]
</blockquote>

{{clear}}
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== G ==
|-
|

;[[Gal pal|gal-pal]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a female friend.

<blockquote>''And also, I would like to give a shout-out to...Ivy, sweet '''gal-pal''' of mine...and her friend Rachel across the hall from her, in a college within these United States!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Update_18_March_2009_More_Updated</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris rarely refers to any of his female friends as just "friends", simply because he thinks that all female friends have the potential to be [[CWC-isms#S|sweethearts]] before they're in the dreaded [[Friend Zone]]. Chris also states that due to his autism, this somehow means that he gets along much more easily with girls than with guys. <ref>Autism Tutorial Part 5</ref> Although this could be more due to the fact that he overall has had much better experiences with girls than with boys growing up, especially in high school. This has caused him to pick up more [[Transgender|effeminate traits and characteristics]]. The term "gal-pal" is typically used by women when they are talking to other people in their social clique. Chris therefore picked this phrase up from the girls he's talked to (possibly using the phrase because he sees himself as "one of the girls"). It is also common for [[homos]] to use this to refer to their female friends.
</blockquote>
;gawd
<blockquote>
1. ''(interjection)'' eye dialect of "god", Used in the place of "god" when it is used to express annoyance, shock, or pain.

<blockquote>''Life is f***ed up. (I had a real stressful Sunday afternoon) '''Gawd'''! Just... GAWD!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/2017_tweets#STRESSFUL_SUNDAY._GAWD.21</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Possibly meant to add dramatic effect to saying "god", which is already used to add dramatic effect.</blockquote>

;gaybian
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a male lesbian.

<blockquote>''Uh… simply put—and I am willing to say this… in sound mind and body: I… am a '''gaybian'''.''<ref>[[Chris_Comes_Out_of_the_Closet]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris only used this word once in the video [[Chris_Comes_Out_of_the_Closet]]. Before this video, [[Clyde Cash]] had threatened to harm [[Julie]] under the condition that Chris refuses to admit that he's gay. Chris being Chris, he had absolutely no idea that he was once again under another elaborate trolling scheme, and had no clue how to handle the situation. Chris thought he could be sly and admit to being gay, while also being attracted to women. Thus, he tacked on the word "gay" onto "lesbian" to create the word "gaybian" so that he can say that he's a "male lesbian", despite this being a complete contradiction within itself.</blockquote>

;geinus
[[Image:Robotnik.jpg|thumb|I'M A MAD GEINUS! [[Doctor Robotnik|ROBOTNIK]]! ROBOTNIK!]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' a genius

<blockquote>''Robotnik! Robotnik! I'm a mad '''geinus'''! Robotnik, Robotnik!''<ref>[[Sonichu 1]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An accidental misspelling of "genius", this CWC-ism is the result of Chris's ability to spell, or lack thereof. In his futile attempts to spell words with "eni", he substitutes this with "ein", possibly due to his habit of spelling words phonetically.</blockquote>

;get it through your skulls
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' Used to clarify something to your fans
<blockquote>''So everybody '''get it through your skulls''', I'm the real deal.'' <ref>[[CCWC's Final Warning to the Second CWC]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this term a lot when trying to clarify various misconceptions about him, such as his straightness, and who the real CWC was. Variations of the phrase include "GET IT THROUGH YOUR THICK SKULLS", "Get it through your damn, dirty, immature skulls!", and "Get through your damn, dirty, stupid, idiotic, immature skulls".</blockquote>

;gitar
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' A guitar

Origin: How Chris pronounces the word "guitar".
</blockquote>

;give birth, give the birth
<blockquote>
1. ''(verb)'' To transfer possession of the state of having been born, by bearing as offspring.

<blockquote>''My mother and my father are both really nice, old-fashioned-type people who not only '''gave the birth'''--gave me birth at their ages...which my mother is sixty-six, currently, and my father is currently eighty. They both just turned that way in the last couple of months. And, uh, I was born in 1982. They gave me the birth...then, and, uh, anyway, it was so nice of--for them to give me the, uh, birth during the early [[1980s]].''<ref>[[Chris Chan's Public Announcement]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to think that a sentence like "Barbara gave birth to Christian" is grammatically equivalent to a sentence like "Barbara gave Go-bots to Christian."
</blockquote>

;GO!
<blockquote>
1. ''(adjective)'' Having a style similar to the cartoon ''Teen Titans Go!''.

<blockquote>''As MUCH, as I would like to agree; Cute as it may be, it is still '''GO!''' Version, and #GOPony is something we Really do not like.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1211396957203247104</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' Of a descent originating from [[Dimensions|dimension CZ-69]].

<blockquote>''Just; Most '''GO!''' individuals are...NO!!!''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1215833863718567937</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this CWC-ism to describe his distaste for the MLP:FiM spinoff series [[Pony Life]], believing it to be in the same vein as Teen Titans Go! due to its artstyle. He would go around on his [[Twitter]] account spamming Hasbro and/or users showing any interest in the show with some of his TSSSF cards as a means of protest using this euphemism to put it under a bad light.
</blockquote>

;go make a rhyme
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used by Chris to indicate that he is in a [[Chris and writing|poetic]] mood.

<blockquote> ''Oh, Back Off, '''go make a rhyme'''. Love will come your way in good time.<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/913230475774369794</ref> Keep Heart, Have hope and faith. Life is a coinkie-dink strafe. Have an open heart, don’t be afraid. Your sweetie is likely in your friendship parade.''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris intended to write a rhyme in order to sound poetic in a tweet, continuing with the rhyming schtick in several subsequent ones. Due to his own laziness, the best Chris could come up with in terms of words that rhyme with "time" is "rhyme".
</blockquote>

;[[Godjesus]]
[[Image:Jesusbot.jpg|thumb|This is who Chris actually believes in.]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(shorthand)'' God and Jesus Christ.

<blockquote> ''As I have guide, as I was guide [sic] by, uh, God and Jesus. And because I, uh, cheated on Ivy lately, '''Godjesus''' were mad at me, so, even though she r-, even though she requested the recent items of question, sex-, [quietly] sexual stuff--videos and pictures--I am being punished because the trolls are getting their hands on them.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Matthew_5:27,_CWC_Confessions</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And also, who I'd like to thank, '''GodJesus''', our God and our Lord and savior, for their support, for their support as well, I pray to them every day, and I follow, I am guided by Jesus.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Update_9_April_2009</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris appears to be somewhat aware of the Holy Trinity (Holy Spirit, Son, and Father), the three forms that God takes in mainstream Christianity. Despite accepting Jesus as the son of God, Chris believes that God and Jesus are essentially the same entity. As a result, whenever he mentions God, he is never reluctant to mention Jesus in the same sentence. Because of this, Chris made this CWC-ism as a shorthand of "God and Jesus". This CWC-ism was the primary inspiration for the term "[[Godbear]]" to humorously refer to [[Leonard Bearstein]], who Chris has credited for his name change. Chris now no longer uses his CWC-ism, now referring to both God and Jesus as separate [[OCs]]. Chris now calls God "Emmanuelle".</blockquote>

;grand number of pounds
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' Extremely heavy.

<blockquote> ''Note: The chair weighs a '''grand number of pounds'''!<ref>[[Power]]</ref>'</blockquote>

Origin: Used in a video where he tried to prove his strength to [[Vanessa Hudgens]], who was actually [[Joshua Martinez]], by lifting an office chair.
</blockquote>

;grinds my gears
<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used by Chris to indicate he is annoyed with something.

<blockquote>Firstly, I got your image in my mailbox; while I thank you for your fanart, No Offense, but I do not appreciate Sonichu drawn looking retarded; I feel it '''grinds my gears''' a bit.<ref>[[Mailbag_2#In_which_Chris_insults_someone_who_drew_a_picture_for_him]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>Something that '''grinds my gears''' is how people are not accepting of the neutral terms of "darling" or "dear".<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:OpenLetter.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this phrase almost every time he wanted to indicate he was annoyed and not outright [[angry]]. It is believed that Chris has picked up this archaic phrase from [[Family Guy]], specifically from a segment from the show called "What Really Grinds My Gears", where Peter is talking about things that annoy him or "grinds his gears".

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== H ==
|-
|

;hand-drawing
[[Image:Chris holding a pencil.png|thumb|Chris holding a pencil|200px]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An original drawn image, as opposed to a facsimile of that image.

<blockquote>''I mean, does that look like a printout to you? No! It's a '''HAND-DRAWING'''! It's the original hand-drawing of the back cover I constantly used! Among all the other hand drawings on my SHELF! In my BINDERS! IN THIS ROOM! In this house!''<ref>[[Chris dispels videogame rumors]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(verb)'' To sketch without the aid of digital technology, such as a computer.
[[File:Sonichuipaddrawing2020.jpg|thumb|A non-example made by Chris.]]
<blockquote>''No, actually, what I thought, is that you skip the '''hand-drawing''' and you draw everything on your PhotoShop with your computer mouse.''<ref>[[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 2]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's process for producing his drawings is to draw them, by hand, on physical paper, and then scan the paper into his computer and use image editing software to add effects like lettering or (for the purpose of breaking the fourth wall) photographs. He takes comfort in the belief that ownership of the original paper drawings is evidence of his authorship and will frequently cite this in defense against perceived thieves and trolls.

Chris also thinks that drawing on a computer instead of paper is an inferior method of producing artwork; he thinks the results look "blocky and low-resolution," which probably speaks more to his [[:File:179-ShineSchuChara.jpg|his own experience using MSPaint]] than the artistic quality of, for example, [[Asperchu]]. The fact that a digital artist like Alec Benson Leary is nonetheless ''using his hands'' does not seem to have occurred to Chris.
</blockquote>

;Haterade

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a metaphorical drink consumed by haters.
<blockquote>''Therefore, for all of you '''Haterade'''-Chugging “GET A JOB!” spouters out there, I suggest you Shut Up and enjoy your ability to settle in a cozy Office or wherever. For the rest of us, the worlds and the dimensions are our Offices, and we are doing our best, so we can reach our respective Fated Destined Promotions. But, I Digress. <ref>[[June 2019 social media posts#Fan art isn't thoughtful when it feeds into Chris's delusions]]</ref>''</blockquote>

<blockquote>''Put down the '''Haterade'''; this is not going against any rules, it is just the way it is. Hey! I still have my flaws, so I am definitely Not a Mary Sue type of OC. Also, if I wanted a shot glass of '''Haterade''', I would read most anything this dimension’s @realDonaldTrump ever wrote.''<ref>[[June 2019 social media posts#Fan art isn't thoughtful when it feeds into Chris's delusions]]</ref></blockquote></blockquote>

<blockquote>2. ''(noun, informal)'' excessive negativity, criticism, or resentment.

<blockquote>''This is in reference to the Nypical '''Haterade''' Comment of “Get A Job” that is not only thrusted upon me, but to everyone who is creative and have powerful in their own respective, individual rights.<ref>[[June 2019 social media posts#Fan art isn't thoughtful when it feeds into Chris's delusions]]</ref>''</blockquote>

Origin: Originally said by Lars in the 2010 [[Lars Call]]. Chris then used it almost nine years later. Likely a pun on the sports drink Gatorade.
</blockquote>
;[[heart level]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's way of measuring his emotional state

<blockquote>''100% Change the number to change your '''heart level''' and you can write a sentence to indicate how you feel.''<ref>[[Heart_level]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The concept of the "heart level" most likely stems from Chris's inability to understand emotions. As an alternative, Chris tends to use video game terms in order to measure such emotions.</blockquote>

;heal
<blockquote> 1. ''(verb)'' to ejaculate into someone.

<blockquote>''Had I Not '''healed''' her, she would be dead Late August.''<ref>[[Jail Letter - 16 November 2021]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris had somehow come to the conclusion that sex with his mother would make her more youthful, hence "healing" her.

</blockquote>

;heartsweet
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a [[sweetheart]].

<blockquote>''Rosey, as often as birds tweet, will you be my lovely '''heartsweet'''?''<ref>"[[Sonichu's Ode to Rosechu]]"</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Rearrangement of "sweetheart," possibly coined initially to provide more rhyming options in poetry. Chris primarily uses this term in Sonichu's dialogue, as the character's pet name for Rosechu. When speaking for himself, Chris tends to prefer "sweetheart," although the trolls use "heartsweet" in conversation with him.

''See also: [[sweetbolt]]''
</blockquote>

;heavyweight
[[File:Studalert.png|thumb|Chris does NOT look like Chris Farley]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Stockboy; person employed to move heavy objects and perform other menial labor.

<blockquote>If she gets pregnant and can't work, then I would be working. I would be working VERY HARD AND HEAVILY. [...] If I have to I would be, get one of the '''heavyweights''', that just moves the boxes around the, stock the shelves at a grocery store.<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' heavy.

<blockquote>I do not think Chris Farley looks like me at all, plus he was a LOT more '''heavyweight''' than me, and he was more wild than me.<ref>[[Jackie_e-mails_Part_2]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, as usual, has to repurpose words rather than use the existing words that already mean what he wants to say.
</blockquote>

;hedgehog-defensive (or hedgehog)
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Protecting oneself by curling up into a ball, just like a [[Sonic the Hedgehog|hedgehog]].

<blockquote>And I do understand all that. Believe me, and I need not be reminded of the worst part, but my '''hedgehog-defensive''' state and all of the tears and leaking mucus and whole body paralysis that happened to me then and there will haunt me in reminder of that.<ref>[[TooManyGames#Personal_space_talk]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>@MLPSilverQuill, having one’s own spirit killed is really not fun nor funny at all. And, believe me, I was literally in a worse huddled position than what I see here, and I FELT DEVASTATED at that moment. I went full '''Hedgehog Defensive''' and let my quills keep others back. It Hurts<ref>[[April_2019_social_media_posts#Hedgehog-defensive_state]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Replacing the likes of his [[Megatron pistol]] and his [[pepper spray]], Chris has adapted the habit of rolling up into a ball to protect himself from unwanted physical contact. The protective state he dubs "the hedgehog-defensive state" is most likely based off of the spin-dash attack from the Sonic the Hedgehog franchise, which the titular character uses to attack foes.</blockquote>

;[[hermaphrodite]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A derogatory term for passing transgender women, particularly those that haven't gotten bottom surgery.

<blockquote>''OH MY GOD!!! UGH!!! ARE YOU REALLY A '''HERMAPHRODITE'''?! I'm sorry, but that naughty picture just really shocked me and made me want to throw up. *deep breath* You do have a pretty face, but what happened just now is just like the movie, "The Crying Game", or the Thanksgiving episode of "The Cleveland Show".''<ref>[[Mailbag 25#It's a trap, again!]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' A person of an ambiguous gender, or who is female, who also has a penis.

<blockquote>If a '''Hermaphrodite''', I would raise it to be male regardless since it would not have any eggs anyway. Plus big bonus for (him) in sex with all women (lesbians included I would imagine).<ref>[[List of OkCupid Answers]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin:A misuse of the archaic term for intersex people. Chris appears to use this term to refer to someone he deems as "almost a woman", which is also shown when he referred to some of his female characters as "all female" when having their penises removed. Chris used this term when he noticed that the sweetheart [[Bailey Jay]] had a penis, and she explained to him her experiences as a transwoman. Chris also notably talked about how if he had a "hermaphrodite" as one of his offspring, he'd raise them as a boy. Chris's rather specific usage of this term also shows some of his prior beliefs about gender before he transitioned himself, such as who he deemed "male" or "female" in the first place.</blockquote>

;[[HEXBox]]
[[File:KillThatHexBawx.jpg|thumb|]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any of the video game consoles made by Microsoft, primarily the Xbox 360.

<blockquote>I never cared for the '''HEXBox''', and frankly it LACKS heavily in comparison to the Wii and PS3, PLUS YOU HAVE TO PAY THEIR FEES TO EVEN GO ONLINE OR DOWNLOAD DEMOS WITH IT.</blockquote>

Origin: Due to his [[Chris and brand loyalty|Brand Loyalty]], Chris had an irrational hatred for the XBox, simply because of how much you've got to pay for it to access some of its content<ref>[[Mailbag_5]]</ref>. Because Chris viewed this device as a curse to humanity, he tacked the word "hex", which is defined as being a curse, onto the original name of the console.</blockquote>

;hide behind/under his mother's skirt
<blockquote>1. ''(idiom)'' To behave in a cowardly, immature fashion.

<blockquote>''You come to me now. Come face me like a man. Unless you want to continue being called a cow-a quivelling coward who '''hides under his mother's skirt'''.''<ref>[[Challenge for Clyde II]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An antiquated phrase alluding to children literally hiding behind their mother's skirts when frightened.
</blockquote>

;hippo on one's head
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A predicament or unpleasant situation one is currently facing

<blockquote>''I'M WET. I'M COLD. THERE'S A HIPPO ON MY HEAD. AND CLEARLY, I'M NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO DO THIS ON MY OWN.''<ref>[[:File:JailArt15.jpg]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Someone's [[wikipedia:Hippocampus|hippocampus]]

<blockquote>''(EVERYBODY has a Hippo on their head; it is called the Hippocampus)''<ref>[[:File:FSM2.PNG]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris states in an e-mail directed at [[Regina Novakova]] that the phrase originated as an example of his [[random-access humor]], apparently as a pun of the word "hippocampus". Following from this, he would famously use the term in a [[HippoOnYourHead|Flipnote animation]] of a person literally getting crushed by a falling hippo, and then use the term several more times to describe the "weight" of the hippo on people's heads. He has lately used this term to describe his struggles with being in jail in a drawing sent to [[Praetor]].

</blockquote>

;[[homo]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A male homosexual

<blockquote>''Yes; the '''Homos''' I have heard from try to push their damn lifestyle in my face, and I DO NOT CARE FOR THAT AT ALL; What they do behind closed doors is None Of My Business, and I still Do Not Care to know a Damn Thing about it.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Common_Questions''</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' A non-passing transgender woman, particularly one Chris doesn't deem an authentic woman

<blockquote>''So I would- so I would say, good luck being a fake woman because you'll never be able to achieve true femdom! And you'll always be a dang homosexual male, 'cuz you're born that way, you gonna to stay that way pretty much even if you're gonna- if you're gonna have your dick either chopped off or tucked in! People are still gonna look at you so ill. In the majority of this country.''

''Anyway, that's my response for now.''

''Damn '''homo'''.''<ref>[[Response to ADF]]</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(adjective)'' homosexual

<blockquote>''Every one of you who thinks I'm '''homo''' and calls me that—-because I am not; I'm straight! I'm straight!''<ref>[[CWC's_Second_Message]]</ref></blockquote>

4. ''(adjective)'' relating to homosexuals

<blockquote>''Again, to reiterate the issue, THE GOD DAMN F***IN' '''Homo''' Ads MUST BE GONE!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Blog</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Before the [[Tomgirl Saga]], Chris had a hatred for homosexuals, out of fear that he'll become one himself. Even uttering words like "gay" and "homosexual" would make him uncomfortable. Chris also believed that those that strayed too much from their assigned gender at birth would turn out as being gay, which explains his defensiveness towards his more effeminate traits.</blockquote>

;[[Honest Content|honest]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' NSFW, containing adult content.

<blockquote>''Parental Advisory - VERY '''HONEST''' content.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic10P97.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris only has a slightly good understanding of what honesty is. However, Chris doesn't seem to understand when it's most appropriate to be honest. In his mind, to attract mates, he has to be honest all of the time, even if this includes instances of his sexual misadventures. Chris knows that he's not supposed to discuss such topics publically with ordinary people, so he would have to keep such things in secret. Therefore, in his mind, it would be the honest thing to do to discuss such actions.
</blockquote>

;Hurtful Truth Level
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A point at which honest criticism should be stopped so as to avoid hurting a person's feelings, regardless of the usefulness of the advice.

<blockquote>''And another thing, When constantly exceeding that '''Hurtful Truth Level''' to me, it feels like to me you're, and you may as well have, told me, "I Hate You! I Hate You!", and forget about me.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 23]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Said in an email to Jackie after she had pointed out several glaring flaws in Chris's lifestyle and personality. Rather than take her criticism to heart and improve himself, he got angry and defensive, wishing that she would show sympathy for him instead.
</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== I ==
|-
|

;I can feel the cosmos
[[File:I can feel the cosmos.jpg|thumb|right]]
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Statement of achievement and oneness with the universe.

<blockquote>''I promise, uh, three da—three pages a day, drawn or colored, but, also with the, uh, website, and God/Jesus's support, I feel like... we will be seeing many new—many new thing. The website will be better. '''I can feel the cosmos!''' Peace.''<ref>[[CWC Update 9 April 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Inspired by a line from the game Katamari Damacy, [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UmWxNFq6_3U "Oh, I feel it. I feel the cosmos."]
</blockquote>

;I got a fish

<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Claim that one owns a fish.

<blockquote>'''''I got a fish!''' Would ya like to make a wish?''
''I got a fish Would ya like to make a wish?''
''I got a fiiiiiiiiish! Would ya like to make a wish?''<ref>[[I_Got_A_Fish]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in a song of the same name, where Chris' [[random-access humor]] shines.</blockquote>

;I HATE ME TOO!!!

<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' A self-destructive phrase used to attempt to gain pity from trolls

<blockquote>''You know what, '''I HATE ME TOO!!!'''''<ref>[[You know what, I HATE ME TOO!!!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used as part of the title of a gallery found on Chris’s [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] Page.
</blockquote>

;[[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD]]!
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expressed angrily when you wish to break someone apart to kill them

<blockquote>''Jason Kendrick Howell... you BASTARD! BASTARD! You hacked into everything! You have driven me so beyond the wall, I can't even DESCRIBE it! YOU'RE LAUGHING NOW, BUT... '''I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD!''' Goodbye!''<ref>[[Jason Kendrick Howell message]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used as a [[death threat]] to [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] after he has hacked Sonichu.net.</blockquote>

;IBAChandler
<blockquote>1. ''(expression)'' Abbreviation for "I be a chandler," i.e., "I am a person named 'Chandler.'"

<blockquote>''I am so sick of hearing that stupid name that somebody made up back when I had that '''IBAChandler''' account, and I be a Chandler. You know, "I" being myself, "B" standing for specifying who I am, and "Chandler" being my last name.''<ref>[[Show RESPECT to me, "C"CWC]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(proper noun)'' [[YouTube]] username in use by Christian Weston Chandler during his conflict with [[Liquid Chris]], leading trolls to accuse Chris of being an impostor of Liquid named [[Ian Brandon Anderson]].

3. ''(proper noun)'' Name of a ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' villain based upon Liquid Chris, ironically named for the real Chris's alias.

<blockquote>'''''I B A Chandler''', And I am here to copycatly sieze claim of you hedgehogs and this city from your absent mayor's domain.''<ref>[[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], page 79</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Inspired by [[Bob Chandler]]'s license plate, "I B MR C" ("I be Mister C.").<ref>[[CWC Update 29 July 2009]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;ID
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' Identifying.

<blockquote>''"That is the difference between Trans Gender and Vestites; '''ID''' as the other sex, and dressing like it, respectively"''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-335#post-2635076]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Possibly derived from ID meaning "Identification". </blockquote>

;[[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the extremely high probability that any woman Chris talks to is not [[CWC-isms#boyfriend-free|boyfriend-free]].

<blockquote>''With the '''infinitely high Boyfriend-Factor''', I am not fond of about 99.999999999996% of the total male population, with a margin-of-error of the 4 billionth of a percent (for about 100 men) of whom are okay acquaintences.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Megan_emails,_Aug-Dec_2007</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In general, Chris will almost never find a sweetheart.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sweetheart#Will_Chris_ever_have_a_Sweetheart.3F</ref> Already aware of this fact, but not willing to admit he's not at all attractive to most women, Chris blames it on the fact that most men are "jerks", and that one probably is already dating the woman he's trying to latch onto.</blockquote>
;information overload

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An act of spamming a webpage with pictures.

<blockquote>''I had thought the '''Information Overload''' would somehow Take Down the page; I admit that I was mistaken.<ref>[[Chris chan (CWCipedia)]]</ref>''</blockquote>

Origin: When Chris saw all of the explicit pictures on his Encyclopedia Dramatica page, he decided that the best course of action would be to spam the article with his own pictures. His logic was that if he kept doing this faster than the other editors, they'd have to delete the article, as they just wouldn't catch up with him.
</blockquote>

;instinction

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An instance of something being used a certain way.

<blockquote>''Also, I would have the secondary definition of the word "gay", being Homosexual, REMOVED from the word in the dictionaries, and all '''instinctions''' and sayings of the word will ONLY LEGALLY be used to mean HAPPY, as it was originally intended among songs like "Deck the Halls"''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_and_English</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Once again an instance of Chris trying to sound smart by using a word that sounds foreign to him, made up or otherwise. The end result, however, gives the impression that Chris isn't familiar with the word "instances".

</blockquote>

;intersex

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Relating to any gender identity outside of the gender binary.

<blockquote>''As a Tomgirl, '''Intersex''' of Female Soul with Male Body, and a Tranny Cross-Dresser, I am in full support for Human Equal Rights for everyone."''<ref>[[August 2014 Facebook Posts#Chris comes out... kinda]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used the term "intersex" interchangeably with the term "transgender" on many occasions, and also uses it to refer to Silvana, who actually is intersex. This gives the impression that when he talks about something being "intersex", he means that it isn't entirely "male" or "female".

</blockquote>

;[[Iron Curtain|iron curtain]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The mostly hermetic seal between [[Reality Cartoon]]s, such as the [[Chris and reality|real world]] and the fictional universe containing [[CWCville]], that prevents the [[Dimensional Merge]] from proceeding.

<blockquote>''But we are getting increasing magics, here, with more and more opening portals and growing tears and cracks in the '''iron curtain'''''.<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-11-19-chris-begs-while-posting-creepy-photo-of-barb.63305/post-5610374 Twitter, 19 November 2019]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Coined by Sir Winston Churchill in 1946 to refer to the limits of Russian intrusion into central Europe after the War. Chris presumably heard it once in [[Manchester High School|history class]] and forgot what it meant, unless he is comparing his fictional world to the [[Chris and censorship|Soviet Union]]. Alternatively it was fed to him by the [[Idea Guys]].

''See Also:'' [[#F|fourth wall]]</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== J ==
|-
|
;Jail of Fail
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. A rather unappealing jail to reside in.

<blockquote>''I have a temporary Soul Partner, a Holy Flame Type, you may Remember her (on her repentence tour) keeping me safe, well, not abused, and good, alongside Many (Good) Angels, Spirits, and OP allies in and around this '''Jail of Fail'''. We presently have a genuine Turkish Prayer Rug and a deck of Playing Cards from the Commisary, along with very much appreciated Sports Bra, Socks with no holes, Earplugs, and a few other goodies.''<ref>[[Jail Letter - 4 October 2021]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Said in a letter to the long-time orbiter and enabler, [[Kenneth Engelhardt]].

</blockquote>

;janekop
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. A female [[CWC-isms#jerkop|jerkop]].

<blockquote>''YOU'RE UNDER ARREST. SO SAYS THIS '''JANEKOP'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Feelings_of_the_election_results</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Whereas the term "jerkop" is a portmanteau of the CWC-ism "jerk" and the word "cop", janekop is a portmanteau of the words "jane" and "cop". The word "jane" is a slang word for "woman". <ref>https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/jane</ref>
</blockquote>
;[[JERKS|jerk]]
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. Any male other than Chris and his dad in general, particularly those that Chris dislikes, especially one that gets in the way of his LoveQuest.

<blockquote>''On the flip side, I feel discomfort around men, because they can be such mean and cruel '''jerks'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_Girls</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The term "jerk" is generally defined as "A person with unlikable or obnoxious qualities and behavior, typically mean, self-centered or disagreeable".<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/jerk#Etymology_1</ref> As stated in the quote above, Chris believes that all men to be cruel, selfish, and overall unlikeable. Therefore, he views almost all men as jerks.
</blockquote>
;[[Jerkop|jerkop]]
<blockquote>''(noun)'' 1. An official of the law.

<blockquote>''I would have left peacefully, in fact, I was ready to go, but I had a prepared speech to say to them stupid '''Jerkops'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Get-Tar_Region</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Since Chris views most officers of the law as jerks, due to how often they'd thwart his LoveQuest, the term is a portmanteau of "jerk" and "cop". Possibly a pun on the word "jerkoff", which is defined as being "a contemptible man".<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/jerk--off</ref></blockquote>

;[[For Julie's Eyes Only|JULAAAAAAAY]]
[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|thumb|Chris preparing for hanky-panky with Julie, using a blow-up doll no less]]
<blockquote>''(interjection)'' 1. An expression used by Chris to indicate how much he'd love having sex for the first time with [[Julie]]

<blockquote>"Oh, Julie...'''JULAAAAAY''', JULAAAAAAAAAAY!!!"<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/For_Julie%27s_Eyes_Only</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris first shouted this infamous CWC-ism in the video [[For Julie's Eyes Only]]. He originally intended to share this video privately with [[Julie]], (unaware that 'she' was actually a 13-year-old male troll), to show what their first date would amount to, despite this breaking his Three Date Rule. Seeing how Chris was somewhat of a porn junkie,<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Chris%27s_Adam_%26_Eve_purchases</ref><ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Miyamoto_emails#Chris_Sets_the_Record_STRAIGHT</ref> Chris must have picked up that during sexual intercourse, one of the people may shout the name of the other person in order to "spice up" the orgy. When the video got leaked soon after, the term started to be used by trolls humorously, to the point where [[weens]] started using the phrase in excess, making the CWC-ism lose its luster.</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;jumping the shark
<blockquote>''(verb)'' 1. To start over from scratch

<blockquote>"I am moving out of this Twitter into creating a new one I created, @CPU_CWCSonichu. New and renewed followers will all be screened by my ally, as to keep out the Haters and Harassers. Starting up new and fresh. '''Jumping The Shark''' from old to new"<ref>[[Misc texts#CPU_CWCSonichu]]</ref>

</blockquote>

Origin: The term "jumping the shark" humorously refers to the point where something once popular which has begun to lose its viewer base pulls an extreme stunt in hopes of garnering attention. The term comes from an episode of the television show ''Happy Days'', where Fonzie literally jumped over a shark while water skiing. Ironically enough, despite Chris' misuse of the phrase, many people could easily say that the comic of Sonichu and Chris as a person have "jumped the shark" several times, especially with [[Retroactive continuity in Sonichu|retcons]] and- of course- Chris's change into a [[Transgender|transwoman]].

</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== K ==
|-
|
;kawaii
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' cute or adorable.

<blockquote>''That look really suits you; you look so '''kawaii''' and cool.😊''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1209184205776797697</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The mainstream Japanese word typically used to describe cute subculture. Chris has used this word in almost all cases where he describes anything he thinks is cute and cuddly, more so in recent times, where the use of this word is no longer taken seriously, and seen as more of a joke to poke fun at [[Joshua Wise|weeaboos]].</blockquote>

;[[Kick the Autistic]]
[[File:CWC gets kicked.jpg|thumb|A self-administered kick]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' America's favorite game

<blockquote>''I REALLY WANTED THAT TRIP SO I COULD HAVE A CHANCE TO IMPRESS MY SWEETEST MEGAN AND POSSIBLY FULFILL MY DREAM OF GETTING MARRIED AND SOON HAVE A DAUGHTER NAMED CRYSTAL. YET NOW I, A FRUSTRATED HIGH-FUNCTIONALLY AUTISTIC 25-YEAR OLD VIRGIN, HAVE BEEN BALLZ-BROKEN LIKE I HAVE THROUGH A BIG CHUNK OF MY LIFE IN AMERICA'S FAVORITE GAME, '''"KICK THE AUTISTIC!"''' *sigh*''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chop_Chop_Master_Onion%27s_Rap_Showdown</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Any action which involves doing something to Chris that he doesn't like

<blockquote>''And if you have so much free time to play the cruelest game of '''"KICK THE AUTISTIC"''', then you CAN and SHOULD put the time to better use; volunteer for a social chore; take up the culture in tasteful art; go out and socialize.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica#21_January</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(noun)'' Any form of discrimination towards Chris for being [[autism|autistic]].

<blockquote>''And so, the world continues to play the world's favorite game of "'''Kick the Autistic'''". I'm gonna need all the luck I can get. *Game Over*''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Vivitheg%27s_AIM_chat</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris had this paranoid idea that the whole world is going against him and his goals, solely due to his autism. In this sense, the fact that so many people supposedly wanted to thwart his goals made him feel like he was being "kicked" around. </blockquote>

;Kra-Kow!

<blockquote>
1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase indicating that Chris roasted someone.

<blockquote>''What? I’m just telling the truth. I hear and see WORSE shit from you Haters. At this point, I’d rather look back in that memory than PTSD over y’all’s Hate-Filled content. '''Kra-Kow!'''''<ref>https://mobile.twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1231269768310722560</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. Most likely inspired by the sound lightning makes.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== L ==
|-
|

;Laughs Under Lucricities
<blockquote>
1. ''(backronym)'' backronym for "LULZ"

<blockquote>''Although, F.Y.I., "LULZ" is short for "'''Laughs Under Lucricities'''"''<ref>[[Chris chan (CWCipedia)]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Any form of humor made at Chris' expense

<blockquote>''... your bully of a boyfriend is the Original Author of the "Chris-chan" page that was put up there for the "LULZ", "'''Laughs Under Lucricities'''". Which I don't have to tell you is not only mean and cruel, the page is HORRIBLE''<ref>Chris emails 2008</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: It's likely that Chris first heard of lulz on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]-<ref>[[Chris E-mails 2008#August]]</ref> the slogan of which is "in lulz we trust"- and thus forever associated the term with trolling. Originally he would simply say "LULZ" ''ought'' to stand for "Laughs Under Lucricities," but he soon began implying that it already does.<ref>[[Chris_E-mails_2008|Email]] from Chris to Robert Simmons V on 12 August 2008</ref> Lucricities is seemingly a combination of "lucrid" (another non-word with apparent negative connotations that Chris has used<ref>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 48]]</ref>) and "ludicrous" but falls short of being a portmanteau and is more like the result of a head-on collision of the English language.

</blockquote>

;lesbian soul
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' What Chris believes to be his true [[Chris and sexuality|sexuality]].

<blockquote>''I am an all-around, good natured, high-functioning autistic, Female '''Lesbian Soul''', and Transwoman, artist, gamer and creative type.''<ref>https://www.facebook.com/pg/cwcville/about/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: When Chris declared himself transgender, he continued to be attracted to exclusively to biological females regardless of their own sexual orientation.<ref>[[Women Only Need Apply - No STD's]]</ref> Thus, Chris became a lesbian. As a way to assert to detractors that he was a lesbian, Chris cited himself as having a "lesbian soul" despite previously living as a straight man for thirty years.

 </blockquote>
;level-up king
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' Master of [[card games]].

<blockquote>''There must have been about 6 people including Chris and myself at the tourney and when he won he was jumping up and down a yelling "I'm the '''level up king'''!"''<ref>[[Mimms and Lucas Q&A#Follow-up]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Before his permanent ban from the [[GAMe PLACe]], Chris would play games of Pokemon and Yu-Gi-Oh with some of the other customers. Despite his sick obsession with both games, Chris never developed any type of strategy to compete with other players, making it very difficult to succeed at the game, even when he played against small children. Eventually, when the shop was just down to six people, which included Chris, the manager, [[Daniel Mimms|Mimms]], and [[Lucas]], Chris did win a match against a relatively new player, and excitedly jumped up and down at this accomplishment like a child. Along with this, he shouted the phrase "I AM THE LEVEL-UP KING!"</blockquote>

;like, you know
<blockquote>1. ''(discourse particle)'' Space filler during sentence.

<blockquote>''I don't want too much conflict to happen, '''like, you know'''. You wouldn't want too much conflict to happen, like, you know. I mean-like, you know, between you and him any further. Yeah.''<ref>[[I Love You Kacey]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris' speech consists mostly of uh's, um's, and other vocalized pauses.</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;live from home once again
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' An introduction stating that one is recording themselves from their home.

<blockquote> ''Hello everybody this is Christine Chandler coming to you '''live from home once again''' and we're going to talk about the recent and more obvious topic, of "The Dimensional merge". Yes! This dimension! Right here! 1218. Is going to be merged with our sister dimension "C197" where all of our s- where most of our superheroes, super-villains, OCs, and what have you, and other characters, consisted, have been existing and co-existing. Yep!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Dimensional_Merge_Announcements</ref></blockquote>

Origin: This phrase became Chris's typical means of starting his videos since late 2015, replacing the famous Captain's Log. Although it is sometimes used appropriately (i.e. livestreams), Chris uses the phrase even in prerecorded videos that are not, in fact, live.</blockquote>

;[[Love Quest]]
<blockquote>1.''(noun)'' Chris's former on-going search for a sweetheart.

<blockquote>''As for Wes, I blame all of these happenings on him. If he had not taken my life-long friend away from me, I might have a Pretty Girlfriend today. And I would not have had to set out on endeavoring '''LOVE QUEST'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Since attending [[PVCC]], Chris has embarked on a 15-year long quest to find his true love. Chris constantly failing to achieve this goal was what gave this CWC-ism its name.</blockquote>

;lovehog
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A lover in a relationship between two [[CWC-isms#E|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]].

<blockquote>''Also, I have finished the drawing for you, and I have shown off the Original '''LoveHog''' Couple's Wedding Rings, and their three children: Cerah Rosey, Robbie Sonee and (Shiney Rosey) Christine Rosey.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Katie_Bay_E-mails_4</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A portmanteau of "love" and "hedgehog".</blockquote>

;lucricities
<blockquote>1. ''(pl. noun)'' lurid acts or motivations

Origin: Chris completely made this word up, presumably based on "lucrid," which may in turn be based on the actual word "lurid." According to Chris, the word "lulz" can mean either "Laughs at my expense" or "Laughs under lucricities," so presumably the two contexts are equivalent.
</blockquote>

;lucrid
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' obscene, profane, wicked
<blockquote>''And promoting the hatred, and...drawing such loose—such '''lucrid''' mockeries is not gonna further the story plot or have anything new created, or even gonna help in any way...''<ref name=csm>[[CWC's Second Message]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. Possibly a corruption of "lurid," given the context. Alternatively, it might be a corruption of "ludicrous." Chris has used this word to describe the homoerotic/dickgirl art on the ED page, as well as the fan comic in which he was depicted as a man-baby. Ironically, even before Chris used this word
</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== M ==
|-
|

;make one's own peeps n' poops

<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' to urinate and deficate at the same time

<blockquote>''Uh, actually, uh, actually Crystal is uh, doing, is uh, doing her preschool homework, and uh, Reg-, and Reginald's been uh, been a messy lil' babychild! '''Made his lil' peeps n' poops'''! And he went, and he went weewee all over the bathroom.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/PlayingHouse''</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from a clip of Family Guy, where Herber the Pervert is letting his dog out to "make his pees n' poops". <ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZtlwEfZEmrg</ref></blockquote>

;Mama
[[File:Christine and pikachu.jpg|right|thumb|Mama Christine with a [[Sonee]].]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' What Chris refers to himself as when roleplaying as one of his [[OCs]].

<blockquote>''I am going to some shopping and donating amongst the artists affected by the COVID virus of this Dimension, on behalf of '''Mama''', Chris Chan Sonichu. Thank you, again, to the individual who bought the book set recently. Still waiting for the set of #TSSSF cards to sign and offer.''<ref>https://mobile.twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1251259373810302977</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes himself to be a parent to his characters. Since he identifies as a woman, he has given himself the alias “Mama”. Chris further shows his lack of self-awareness by not realizing how awkward it is to have anyone, even his own characters (who are presumably teenagers) refer to him as such.</blockquote>

;[[Manajerks|manajerk]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a store manager

<blockquote>'' two Manajerks asked me to leave, because they said that I was loitering; I was NOT!''<ref>[[CWC's Diary#2005]] (20 July)</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A portmantau of "manager" and "jerk". </blockquote>

;[[Mary Lee Walsh|Mary Lee Walshing]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' akin to to Mary Lee Walsh

<blockquote>''She has proven herself to be a cold-hearted, uncaring, uncompassionate, lack-of-understanding, bigoted, discriminating, selfish, '''Mary Lee Walshing''', Witch Bitch!''<ref>[[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Chris Expresses His Outrage for Walmart]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's ongoing resentment against his old college dean has led him to compare a Wal-Mart manager who banned him from her store to Walsh. He apparently fails to comprehend that the "-ing" suffix is generally associated with verbs.</blockquote>

;mashed potato grenade

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a [[Wikipedia:Stielhandgranate|Stielhandgranate]], a special German hand grenade with a handle.

<blockquote>''I want to just kill him; destroy his goody-two-shoes nature, soul, heart and all that shit my '''mashed potato grenade''' could shatter, but leave his body in tact, so I'm not committed fro murder.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2013_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in a Facebook post sent to [[Megan Schroeder]] accusing her of his [[List of places that have banned Chris|ban]] from the [[The GAMe PLACe|Game Place]], where he [[Chris and reality|makes paranoid claims]] of what she, [[Mimms]], [[Lucas]], and [[Snyder]] were thinking that day. A corruption of "potato masher grenade", a common English nickname of the Stielhandgranate<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stielhandgranate</ref>.</blockquote>

;[[Mass debating|mass debate]]
[[File:Mass_Debate.jpg|right|thumb|Massive Debating]]
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' to pleasure one's self; to masturbate

<blockquote>''I've actually done it '''mass debating''' to myself so many times, even with a hunk of - even with an inflatable plastic woman...''<ref>[[Kacey Call 7]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: This particular euphemism comes from Chris's tendency to refrain from using inappropriate language, as well as his unusual variation of a southern accent combined with a minor speech impediment.</blockquote>

;mental block

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's autism

<blockquote>''And, uh, during my high school years, I was used to being surrounded by… girls… in my circle, and after having to, uh, leave them I felt ever so lonesome. And, after the stress from some of the people—people at PVCC, as well as my '''mental block''' of autism, it became hard from me to approach gir—approach the girls like I used to.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_Chan%27s_Public_Announcement</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris refers to his [[autism]] as a "mental block" because he believes the term refers to a disability. In his case, his supposed disability to socialize with girls. In reality, a mental block is the inability to remember a specific thing at a given moment. <ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mental_block</ref></blockquote>

;Meta

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' being able to break through the fourth wall.

<blockquote>''Also, there is no problem with breaking your own fourth wall with us from your dimension, here. Go '''Meta'''. We are certainly Meta with and for you all as well.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1316825180610670592</ref></blockquote>

Origin: From the Greek prefix meaning "after" or "beyond". Chris views all cartoons as being on a dimension higher than our own. According to him, being able to break through the iron curtain entails obtaining a higher mode of consciousness.
</blockquote>

;mislabel

<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' to put a label on Chris or any of his creations in a way he doesn't like, regardless of truth
2. ''(noun)'' a label of such slanderous nature; see also "misunderstanding"
<blockquote>''I am NOT a Dictator. Why are you giving me an even WORSE '''Mislabeling''' than the Homosexual Mislabelings? Why do YOU have to be so bored that you have to make up NEW mislabelings to try and deface me over and over again? ''<ref>[[Common Questions#1_February_2010]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Just about everywhere. He appears to use this term as often as the word "slanderous". Curiously, the redundancy "ill-mislabeling" (as if there were any other kind) has appeared once.<ref>[[CWC Blog#28_December_2009]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;misspeak

<blockquote>1.''(verb)'' to lie

<blockquote>''Sometimes, I have '''misspoke'''. But you are more important to me than ANYTHING. Believe me! I swear. Hand to God. And on my Bible. I'd have to go look for it.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/ToJackie</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Instead of accepting that someone has called him out on [[Lies|his bullshit]], Chris prefers to say he "misspoke". Needless to say, no one has fallen for this ploy.

</blockquote>

;misunderstanding

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a deliberate view that contradicts Chris; see also "mislabel"
<blockquote>''*AND WE WILL NOT TAKE THE '''MISUNDERSTANDINGS''', THE MISLABELS, AND ALL THE LIKE SITTING DOWN!!!''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|1=Issue_9/Page_39|2=Issue 9 Page 39}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Misappropration. Note that it is not, as in reality,<ref>[http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/misunderstanding Merriam-Webster Dictionary, "misunderstanding"]</ref> a mistaken notion (alternatively a dispute) based on faulty information, but a malicious action worthy of [[tard rage]]. Apparently a slanderous troll has to actively "misunderstand" Chris. Also, Chris has used the related word "misunderstood" (participle adjective) as an insult, not realizing that if the troll misunderstood (transitive verb) him, ''Chris'' would be the one that was misunderstood (participle adjective).<ref>[[Mailbag 39#Rosechu_the_transwoman|Mailbag 39]]</ref>
</blockquote>

;modnar
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' random

<blockquote>''I may be '''modnar''', but I try not to be offensive, and if I do, then I am sorry. I can not please Everyone.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter</ref></blockquote>

Origin: "Random", spelt backwards.</blockquote>

;[[Monthly tugboat|monthly tugboat]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's Social Security Disability Service

<blockquote>"I'm getting by livin' with my folks and a '''monthly tugboat.'''"<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Monthly_tugboat#References_by_Chris</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris apparently coined the term "Monthly Tugboat" due to a comparison he makes between gaining money through his SSDS vs. winning the lottery. In his mind, winning the lottery is like riding a "Luxury ship that can easily sink", while gaining money from the government is the same as getting cargo from a ship pulled by a tugboat. <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/BlueSpike_Skype_Logs_12</ref></blockquote>

;morrow

<blockquote> 1. ''(noun)'' Synonym for moral.

<blockquote>''The '''Morrow''' remains: Look up to whoever and whatever you like as your childhood hero like no one else is watching you; remain proud with your choice and preference. 💜⚡️''<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts#Chris supports playing with whatever toys you want]]</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: Unknown, possibly a corruption of the word moral. Used exclusively by Magi-Chan during Chris month-long twitter roleplay in August and September of 2019.
</blockquote>

;Mother Nature errand
<blockquote>1. ''(idiom)'' The bodily urge to either [[Piss|urinate]] or [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|defecate]].

<blockquote>''All right, well, ladies, it’s been fun, but I gotta split and take care of ah... y’know, a '''Mother Nature errand'''.''<ref>[[Sonichu Home Club]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A peculiar take on the idiom "call of nature".
</blockquote>

;[[Muscle bra|muscle bra]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A sports bra used for covering a man's bare chest.

<blockquote>''And you know what, I highly recommend this to every dude who goes around shirtless: wear a '''muscle bra'''. Because nobody, and I mean nobody wants to see your dog-gone ugly pecs, they're so ugly and repulsive, ugh... creeps everybody out.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Clyde_is_Weaker_than_Water</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Contributing to his previous fear of the homos, Chris also had a fear of seeing the bare chests of other men out of fear that it'll make him gay. He therefore suggested that men cover their chests under penalty of the law. Chris most likely adapted this name due to some weird association he makes between muscles and sports.</blockquote>

;my two bolts and a heart

<blockquote>1. ''(idiom)'' Chris's opinion or takeaway on something.

<blockquote>''Okay. I get serious creep and dark vibrations from all of this. I mean, you may do as you will if it feels right with you. Just '''my two bolts and a heart'''.''<ref>[[April_2021_social_media_posts#Dark_vibrations]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's version of the idiomatic expression "my two cents", referencing his emoji signature "⚡️💙⚡️". Chris has also used a similar phrase before while roleplaying as Sonichu, shortening it to just "my two bolts."<ref>[[Sonichu reads and critiques a Fanfic by The Crimson Libertarian]]</ref></blockquote>

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== N ==
|-
|

;[[naïve]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' dumb, lacking intelligence.

<blockquote>''You are such a cowardly, '''naïve''', retarded, individual.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC_Calls_Out_Three_Na%C3%AFve_YouTubers</ref ></blockquote>

Origin: Chris only seems to understand the most simplified definition of the word. In general terms, the word "naïve" is defined as "showing a lack of experience, wisdom, or judgment."<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/naive</ref> However, in Chris's mind, the word is used to "question one's intelligence". Despite his distaste for the use of the word on him, this turns out to be a commonly used insult by Chris.</blockquote>

[[File:FRENCH-NAVY-CameraObscura.jpg|thumb|Chris travels to France]]
;navy
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' semen.

<blockquote>''You know that, uh—first off, uh, the one... with the '''navy''' being drunk. Yeah. Som—yeah. A b—a—i—a—it's a good idea somet—uhhh... it's a... it's a good idea. But, uh, you know, you don't have to do it if you don't like it, but, uh... I recycle my own semen''<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Play on words, i.e, a navy is a collection of seamen/semen.

''See also: [[CWC-isms#C|Comeuppance]]''
</blockquote>

;nearly same
<blockquote>1. ''(Adjective)'' Similar.

<blockquote>''And so I killed about- killed about twenty miles round trip for gas to go find her house. But it turns out that was a troll posing as that girl. [sighs] THE VOICES SOUNDED '''NEARLY SAME'''.''<ref>[[For Chris]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;negligent

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[negligee]]

<blockquote>So, I went onto Adam & Eve's website, and ordered three garments, and a transparent robe. One of the '''negligent''' is about exactly on what I had drawn onto myself.<ref>[[WCT DMs#Sexy negligee]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An obvious mispelling of "negligee", a form of lingerie.

</blockquote>

;neurotypically hindered
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Lacking the proper mindset or intelligence to understand Chris' world building, just by being normal.

<blockquote>''Go ahead; that Is what happened that day, and they did not mind it much. To mock us makes you all Soo '''Neurotypically Hindered'''.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1203938198424035329</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes that the term "neurotypical" refers to having average brain function, rather than lacking any sort of [[Autism|autistic]] traits.<ref>https://twitter.com/CPU_CWCSonichu/status/1207129697752141824</ref> He believes that if one only possesses average intelligence, it makes it impossible for them to fully accept his fantasy world, thus claiming it as a "hindrance".

</blockquote>

;neutral
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' platonic.

<blockquote>''I apologize, but I meant the term '''neutrally''', and I never meant anything from that.''<ref>[[LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And One More thing, Darling!... Talluah Bankhead would be Insulted with your response to the term's '''neutral''' usage. Hmpf!'<ref>[[LadyOfTheCosmo#Twitter]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris believes words like "darling" and "dear", are gender neutral terms. Because of this, he assumes that if he claims that he used it in a "neutral" way, people will know he's not using the term in a romantic tone.

</blockquote>
<blockquote>2. ''(adjective)'' politically centrist or nonpartisan.

<blockquote>''He is a communist! And we do not like communists within this country! We are Republican, Democrat or ''' neutral'''... And I am '''neutral''', so I can go either way, but I do not exactly care much for communism!'<ref>[[Re-Calling Ahuvia]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Niggo|niggo]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An African-American person.

<blockquote>''Chris: [sighs, raises his voice] BILLY MAYS IS THE NEW MAYER OF CWCVILLE!</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Max: Yeah, and also say that "Christian Chandler will be thrown in jail!" CWCville Jail.''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Chris: And Christian Chandler will be thrown in CWCville Jail.''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Max: "Where he will be raped by a bunch of niggers!" Say this one really loud.''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Chris: Where he will be raped by a bunch of '''niggos'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Julie_Reveals_Herself</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A bastardization of the racial slur "nigger". This minced oath was used only once after [[BlueSpike]] persuaded Chris to say: "''BILLY MAYS is the new mayor of CWCville, and Christian Chandler will be thrown in CWCville jail, where he will be raped by a bunch of niggers''". Chris decided to repeat this phrase, but he also thought he could "outsmart" BlueSpike by replacing "niggers" with "niggos" in order to avoid saying the offending word directly. Ironically, a whole year after the incident, Chris referred to [[Surfshack Tito]] as a "nigger" [[Chris Drops the N-Bomb|several]] [[Surfshack Tito E-mails|times]], despite not even knowing what he looks like.</blockquote>

;No fucking shit / N.F.S.
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' obviously

<blockquote>''[[The WCT]]: Don't let [[Jacob Sockness|Jacob]] get close to you ever.''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Chris: '''No fucking shit'''.''<ref name=wctdms>[[WCT DMs]]</ref></blockquote>
<blockquote>''The WCT: The Sockness Saga will be something to watch when Geno gets there. ''</blockquote>
<blockquote>''Chris: '''N.F.S.'''.''<ref name=wctdms></ref></blockquote>

Origin: Another instance of Chris attempting to add unnecessary emphasis onto his writing.</blockquote>

;[[Nombie-zazis|nombie-zazis]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' zombie nazis

<blockquote>''Anyway, as for the medical study, and this will require your aid, Magi-Chan. In June of 2015, the scientists have found the gene-like molecule which makes a person turn...ugh..'''nombie-zazis'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Son10revp3.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Replacement for homosexuals and homosexuality in the revised [[Sonichu 10]].</blockquote>

;not-troll
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a victim of trolling.

<blockquote>''Consider who does more harassing, which do you block? <ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-278#post-2549629]]</ref>
<blockquote>
*Every Foul-Mouth Troll
*The '''Not-Troll''' they follow</blockquote>''</blockquote>

Origin: In Chris's mind, only two types of people exist on [[the Internet]], those who are trolls, and those who are victims of trolling. Because the person being trolled is supposedly '''not''' a troll, they are a "not-troll". Chris eventually deleted the aforementioned post, and reposted it, replacing "not-troll" with "victim" to clarify what he was referring to in the first place.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-279</ref></blockquote>

;[[Noviophobia|noviophobia]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the fear that someone you want to date is already dating someone else.

<blockquote>''His one fault, that has restricted him from finding the Ms. Right, he had a major case of '''Noviophobia''', where he is afraid to even approach most ladies, because he thought that they were all already paired up with “A Jerk.”''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_News_Dash</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Because Chris was so frustrated with so many [[CWC-isms#J|jerks]] stealing his potential mates, Chris decided that his envy and hatred of men was a real phobia. Thus, overconfident in his ability to speak [[Spanish]], formed the word "noviophobia" by using the Spanish word ''novio'', meaning "boyfriend", and the English suffix, -phobia, meaning fear . </blockquote>
</blockquote>

|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== O ==
|-
|
;[[OC]]
<blockquote>1. ''(abbreviation, noun)'' Original Creator. A god or deity, including [[Chris and religion#Delusions of godhood|Chris himself]].

<blockquote>''I recall that there was a Mythos about me online: myself, Chris Chan, I; I was an '''OC''' in my own stories; was I Real in this “Reality” that is Dimension 1218? And then I was confirmed in late 2007 with that blurry photograph of me in a moment of great shock and stress.''<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(abbreviation, noun)'' Original Creation. A resident of a [[Reality Cartoon|cartoon dimension]]

<blockquote>''I am pleased to announce from this collab piece alone, we have ten Sonichu/Rosechu '''OCs''' confirmed for the OC Expansion Packs of our #TSSSF set of cards, and then some, as I’m also delegating with my other friends as well. This is going to be a massive and lovely OC party!''<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Short for ''original character'', a common term used by fanfiction authors for characters invented by themselves and used in their stories yet not present in the source material. Chris believes that fictional characters [[Chris and reality|really]] exist in other [[dimensions]], and under the [[Idea Guys]]' influence was convinced they are deserving of worship. Beginning with the Console Patron Units from ''[[Hyperdimension Neptunia]]'', he has since generalised this idea on his own.</blockquote>

;OH! MY AXELS! (or OW! MY AXELS!)
[[File:Axels2.jpg|thumb|right]]
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expression of pain in one's axles (the central shafts of rotating wheels or gears in a machine).

<blockquote>'''''OOOHHHHHH!!!! MY AXELS!!!!!'''''<ref>[[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Written for [[Ghostbusters|Ghost Buggy]]'s cameo in [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]], based upon the character's tendency to complain about its aching mechanical components.</blockquote>

;OH, MY CHRIS CHAN!
[[File:CWC GoPony reaction.jpg|thumb|150px|right]]
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Exclamation uttered by Chris during his phases of holding a [[messiah complex]] and [[role-play]]ing as [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]].

<blockquote>''Why the Hell would you read that personal shit about [[Chris|Mama]] with [[LoveYouLongTime E-mails, 2013-2014#Chris fucks himself|the penis thing]]? '''[[CPU Blue Heart|Oh, My Chris Chan]]!'''''<ref>[[Chris-Chan: A Comprehensive History]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Typed as a comment for the [[Chris-Chan: A Comprehensive History]] episode involving an embarrassing email.</blockquote>

;old-fashioned<blockquote>
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Holding a belief that may be considered politically incorrect.

<blockquote>''But still, call me '''old-fashioned''' but, I'd rather be- I would not- I'd uh- I'd definitely wouldn't uh... NOT BLACK. Not black.''<ref>[[Mumble_4]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''My father is '''OLD FASHIONED'''; he NEVER gives thought to homos, and he HATES them too.''<ref>[[IRC (03 January 2009)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to regard most traditional beliefs and rituals to be offensive to the general public.

2. ''(adjective)'' Dating back to the 1980s.

<blockquote>''Ah, you can tell this is an '''old-fashioned''' Lego set on account of this—the old-fashioned "LegoLand" on the corner.''<ref>[[Song of Christian]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to believe anything that's been made more than 5 years ago is as old as dirt.

3. ''(adjective)'' Preferring real women over waifus.
<blockquote>''Nothing against waifus and the people who have them, but I Never Really understood the appeal and concept of making out a character from a show who is Dimensions Away from your own league to be any sort of a significant other to you. I’m more '''old-fashioned''' towards real women.''<ref>https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/954587249622077440</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Unknown. However, Chris seemed to use this word like this because he's aware it isn't considered customary to be sexually attached to fictional characters over real people.

</blockquote>

;ounce of vagina

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Essentially Chris's way of saying "I'll at least lose my virginity at some point".

<blockquote>''And, as for you, Jason Kendrick Howell… as sure as I am to get at least one '''ounce of vagina''', I have your number, and you're going down!''<ref>[[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Obviously confused when it comes to both euphemisms and basic units of measure, Chris has stated that he is sure to get "at least one ounce of vagina" within his lifetime.<ref>[[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)]]</ref> In the years since, he's gotten at least [[Mia Hamm|two]] [[Barbara Chandler|ounces]].
</blockquote>
;outercourse
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' the act of stimulating someone else's genitals.

<blockquote>''I understand. You may or may not have had much exposure to sexual images as I've had, so the idea of a "hand job" (which was the act drawn there) as part of '''outtercourse''''' [sic]'' (versus intercourse) was a surprise to you.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Megan_emails,_2008#Chris_thinks_she_was_scarred_because_she_doesn.27t_know_much_about_sex</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The word "outercourse" is actually another way to refer to dry humping.<ref>http://www.dictionary.com/browse/outercourse</ref> In Chris's mind however, outercourse simply refers to sex which involves touching another's genitals, because the action happen outside of the body.</blockquote>

;overinexperienced
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Being overly inexperienced.

<blockquote>''My Body is sexually overinexperienced, and Starved.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/May_2020_social_media_posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: It apparently didn't occur to Chris that sexual inexperience isn't the least bit comparative, at least not in the context where he intended to use this word.
</blockquote>

;overpowered (or OP)
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' A disproportionate amount of strength, which is worn as a badge of honor.

<blockquote>''If I was a neuro-typical mind, as opposed to '''overpowered''' psychic, I’d have gotten dizzy. ''<ref>[[September 2019 social media posts]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A term normally meant to refer to imbalance in game mechanics. Chris adopted the term at some point during or after the [[Idea Guys]] saga as a way to brag about his nonexistent psychic abilities and ludicrously powerful fictional characters.</blockquote>

{{clear}}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== P ==
|-
|

;parkay
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' an epic style of running

<blockquote>''Hello there, fans! It's Christian Chandler here, live at the downtown mall, where for the Sonichu franchise and city of CWCville, and everything like that, I'm gonna do a '''parkay''' from this point all the way down to the gara--parking garage where, at the end, we will get a nice view of the tent-style theater that's down there where events are held.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_Edge</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In the video [[Sonichu's Edge]], Chris calls his style of running "parkay". Chris confused his running as a form of parkour, an acrobatic sport typically used in the military as a means of practicing the navigation of a complex environment without the use of equipment. <ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parkour</ref>. Given Chris's [[speech impediment]], the word "parkour" somehow came out as "parkay".
</blockquote>

;[[Parody|parody]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Any work that "borrows" characters, plots, or styles from other pieces of fiction, whether infringing International [[Chris and copyright|Copyright]] Law or otherwise.

<blockquote>''Any names, or persons, illustrated in any of the Sonichu Comics, except that of Christian Weston Chandler, that may seem similar to anyone in real life, are purely coincidental, or otherwise '''parodic'''.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=File:Issue_8_Cover.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's understanding of what constitutes as a parody most likely comes from his interest in shows like [[Family Guy]] and [[Excel Saga]], the former of which use copyrighted characters to make jokes around them, and the latter of which parodied various clichés found in anime. In his mind, because those shows can get away with using such characters and scenes, that gives him an excuse to do the same thing in his comics as long as he states it's being done as a "parody". Ironically, Whenever Chris spoted an actual parody, he thought that the characters from the original work were being defaced.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Parody#Chris_does_not_understand_the_concept_of_parody</ref></blockquote>

;peanut
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Someone who disregards you, or otherwise does not accept you for who you are.

<blockquote>''So you enjoy it, just do it—don't worry about other people's opi—pinions. Because, uh, compared to the other schools, those people who disregard you are just total '''peanuts'''. And I'm not talkin' Charlie Brown; I'm talkin' 'bout the little nuts after the shells. The real peanut gallery. That would be peanuts, wouldn't it?''<ref>[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Apparently derived from "[[Wikipedia:peanut gallery|peanut gallery]]," a term used to describe the hecklers in an vaudeville audience who would throw peanuts at a performer. Chris's own spin on this concept is to dismiss such hecklers as being insignificant like literal peanuts.
</blockquote>

;[[Pedofork|pedofork]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A pedophile.

<blockquote>''I am not a '''pedofork''', you DORKS!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC%27s_Second_Message</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Created as a half-assed attempt to make "pedophile" rhyme with dork. Coined in Chris's [[Madman Rising]] video, in response to the trolls who were comparing him to [[wikipedia:Herbert_(Family_Guy)| Herbert the Pervert]] from ''Family Guy''.</blockquote>

;[[Pickle|pickle]]
[[File:Pickle Rick.jpg|right|thumb|Chris bought this back in 2018. The brine-soaked irony!]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A penis, particularly one of [[JERKS|any man that isn't Chris]].

<blockquote>''Do me a favor, draw a VAGINA on my Rosechu, Rosechu IS A GIRL; SHE NEVER HAD A FREAKIN' '''PICKLE'''!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Chrisreply3.PNG</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The word "pickle" is one of the few hundred slang words for the word "penis".<ref>https://web.stanford.edu/~eckert/PDF/PenisTesticlesSlang.pdf</ref> It is unknown why Chris prefers to refer to the penises of other men as "pickles", while he calls his own his "duck", but it may have to do with Chris's sexual insecurity and the fact that he legitimately hates actual pickles <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Mailbag_4#Why_Chris_hates_pickles</ref>, whereas Chris thinks he's special enough to have a cutesy name for his own penis.</blockquote>

;[[Pmurt]]

<blockquote>1. ''(proper noun)'' The 45th and 47th president of the United States: Donald Trump.

<blockquote>''EID '''PMURT''' EID!!!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Eid,_Pmurt,_Eid</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Donald Trump's last name, but spelled backwards. In Chris's first usage of this CWC-ism, Chris mentioned how "Trump spelled backward is "Pmurt", which sounds like "hurt".<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/September_2016_Facebook_posts#Registered_to_vote</ref>
Due to Chris's strong hatred for Trump, he frequently referred to Trump as Pmurt- believing that the spoken word of a backwards name has the power to degrade and weaken a person.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/U8C43P2A37A8_y_U8C1N023V0L</ref>. In Chris's eyes, if he repeated the word again and again, everyone would turn against Trump and start voting for [[Wikipedia:Hillary Clinton|Hillary]]. Unsurprisingly, Chris had no sway over the election aside from his own vote.
</blockquote>

;point at your snout and oink
<blockquote>1. ''(verb phrase)'' Do something humiliating to yourself.

<blockquote>''You both want me to even Beg, you can go '''point at your own damn snouts and Oink''' like Eric Cartman, and then [[Rape]] yourselves with your own Damn [[Star Wars|Darth Maul]] [[Sex toys|Dual LightSabre]].''<ref>[[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A reference to a scene in the ''[[South Park]]'' episode "{{w|Scott Tenorman Must Die}}", where Scott makes Eric Cartman embarass himself by singing a song about being a "little piggy". Chris said this to [[Clyde Cash]] and [[Surfshack Tito]] upon failing to receive a cash bounty for destroying his own [[PlayStation 3]].
</blockquote>

;poke
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Marijuana.

<blockquote>''Anyway, eclectic! High on the hedge and high on the hog. You want some of this '''poke''', mon?<ref>[[CWC address to Royal Board]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Intended as a demonstration of what "Soni-Chew the Eclectic Heeedge Hog Poke Mon of London, England" would sound like. A coded reference to Pokémon, and may or may not be a play on the verb "toke".
</blockquote>

;[[Polyamorous marriage|polyamorous]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Polygamous.

<blockquote>''I go'' [sic] ''married to Magi-Chan Sonichu and Cryzel Rosechu last March, and then I married Sylvana Rosechu and Mewtwo last June. We all share a '''polyamorous''' relationship.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Miss_Cherry_asks_Chris_about_his_marriages.png</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An etymologically malformed neologism from the 1970's for having multiple romantic or sexual relations at once, misapplied by Chris. </blockquote>

;prawns
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Subordinates or helpers, often those wittingly or unwittingly aiding a sinister character.

<blockquote>''You keep sending out your '''prawns''' to do your dirty work, you coward.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Chris%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica#15_May</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris almost certainly meant to type "pawns" here. </blockquote>

;[[Prickly-Wicklies|prickly-wicklies]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Punishments given for insulting or harming Chris.

<blockquote>''War gets you '''prickly-wicklies'''... as well as punches.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/A_Warm_Fuzzy_Tale</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Refer to ''Fuzzy-Wuzzies''.

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#F|fuzzy-wuzzies]]

</blockquote>

;[[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens]]
[[Image:PVCCitizens.jpg|thumb]]
<blockquote>1. ''(backronym)'' The headquarters of several Sonichu villains.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: The name itself is a backronym of the college Chris attended, [[PVCC|the Piedmont Virginia Community College]]. After experiencing several mishaps throughout his college experience<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College#Kicked_out_of_English</ref><ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College#Kicked_out_of_college</ref>, the dean giving him the cold hard truth about why his [[Love Quest]] is doomed to fail became the straw that broke the camel's back, and Chris thought it would be a smart idea to deface the college afterward in his comics.</blockquote>

;prowldent
<blockquote>1. ''(???)'' Unknown.

<blockquote>There's no quote to cite this from, just a logo in which Chris gives the name "Prowldent Virginia Community College" to [[PVCC]].<ref>[[:File:ProwldentVCC.jpg]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Likely combining connotations of "prowl" and "dent" (either to leave an indentation or [[fangs|teeth]]).
</blockquote>

;Pu Tuhs!
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Shut Up!

<blockquote>''SHE; my Ariel Starter was Female from the start, so '''Pu Tuhs!'''''<ref>[[December 2016 Facebook posts#Favorite Pokemon]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: "Shut up" backwards. Because it is backwards, Chris thinks it is more debasing than the normal version of the phrase.
</blockquote>

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Q ==
|-
|

;q-sand
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' Short for quarter sandwich (i.e. a quarter of a sandwich).

<blockquote>
''So, mom ignored her and ate the '''q-sand''' in front of her.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 31]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Appeared in an [[Jackie E-mails 31|e-mail]] sent to [[Jackie]] dated August 5, 2011. Most likely unnecessarily used as a [[Sonic the Hedgehog|way past cool]] abbreviation.
</blockquote>

;quarters
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An office space; headquarters.

<blockquote>''Then that B-Dog ripped up my notes and all, dragged me to her '''quarters''' and talked down to me very RUDELY AND HOARSELY.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris%27s_Wikipedia_profile</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Whenever Chris says that he's being brought to someone's office, he always refers to it as their "quarters", as if he was being brought to some kind of evil hideout. This could be to add unnecessary dramatic effect to his stories.

2. ''(noun, pl.)'' coins, no matter their origin or worth.

<blockquote>''Uhh. I want a soda, but it takes only C '''quarters''' and I only have W quarters. Do you have any change?''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_9_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The first time this word was used like this was in [[Sonichu 9]], where it is revealed that [[CWCville]] issues its currency in the form of "C-quarters" and "W-quarters". According to this issue, 10 C-quarters, make up a single W-quarter, which ultimately defeats the whole concept of the "quarter" coin. Despite being a part of the United States, CWC-ville still issues this strange form of currency, along with US dollars. Because of this, Chris likely decided to refer to his currency as "quarters" so that it could technically count as US currency.</blockquote>

;quite
<blockquote>1. ''(exclamation)'' A fancy replacement of the word "right" or "correct".

<blockquote>''Arthur: Magi-Chan, it's because of his-- you know, he wants to help all of his friends, and with his ability to contact them all simultaenously at the same time, it's an amazing ability to have.</blockquote>

<blockquote>''Chris: '''Quite''', he is the psychic type, after all.''<ref>[[CatKnight Interview]'']</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adverb)'' to the utmost or most absolute extent or degree; absolutely; completely.

<blockquote> ''Hm. Not enough to, uhh... Well, he knows quite-- he can see '''quite''' a bit far into the future, but although there are details of which you might not be able to see, a point or two.'' <ref>[[CatKnight Interview]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''For a hundred dollars? Th-that's, that's '''quite''', that's uh, it'd take more funds for me to, more funds than that for me to be able to acquire the material figures...''<ref>[[CatKnight Interview]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris infamously used this word, along with "indeed" ad nauseam in his interview with [[Arthur Spatchcock]], believing that doing so is essentially the same as speaking his language, British if you will.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== R ==
|-
|

;raincoat
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a condom.

<blockquote>''You ARE the woman...we gotta stop by [[Wal-Mart|Wall-Mall-Wart]] on the way for a "'''raincoat'''".''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_7_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The term "raincoat" is actually an archaic slang term for the word "condom".<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/raincoat</ref> Given that Chris has been raised by two geezers his whole life, and that part of his childhood has consisted of [[Gilligan's Island|old TV shows]], Chris thought that people would understand what he meant when he states that his Mary Sues are having protected sex with a raincoat.</blockquote>

;[[random-access humor]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' non-sequitur.

<blockquote>''Punchy grew up in a dojo, where he perfected his punches. He is also full of '''random-access humor'''. He lost his tail in a brutal fight.''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP5.htm</ref></blockquote>

Origin: According to Chris, his brain is completely random, and it always spews out incoherent garbage. In his mind, this works in the same way a computer processes random-access memory.<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref>

</blockquote>

;rapier
[[File:ReldnahcTheRapier .jpg|thumb|Reldnahc the Rapier]]
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun, attributive)'' rapist, sexual assailant.

<blockquote>
''Now! My '''rapier''' friend, I would very much like you to get off me, please.''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/sonichu-12-pages-54-60.33547/</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris-Chan Sonichu calls [[Reldnahc_Notsew_Naitsirhc#Fictional_biography|Reldnahc Ha-Taque]] his "rapier friend" in [[Sonichu 12|Sonichu #12]] after Reldnahc tackles him to the ground in a suggestive pose and touches his chest, thus (in Chris's hyperbolic mind) "raping" him. As a double double entendre, he could also be using the externally attested definition, as an adjective meaning "witty",<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/rapier#Adjective</ref> and metaphorically referring to a kind of thin, sharp-pointed sword. This is incredibly unlikely due to Chris's basic understanding of the English language, and he most likely didn't know "rapist" is the term for one who rapes, not raper or rapier.
</blockquote>

;reality cartoon

<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' The universe.

<blockquote>
''Life is a cartoon; we are all the characters of the larger; the cartoons we make are part of our own universe; we're all a '''reality cartoon'''.''<ref>August 2017 tweets#"Life is a cartoon"</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Since Chris's life revolves mainly around [[Vidya]] and cartoons, it would make sense to him that the most believable explanation for the universe and everything in it is that it's all a cartoon. Likely related to Chris's known belief that [[Chris_and_reality#Fictional_characters_and_media|all fiction actually exists in alternate universes]]. Chris' interactions with the [[Idea Guys]] made this idea seem even more plausible to him.
</blockquote>

;[[recycling]]

<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' the act of one ingesting their own semen to preserve their sperm count.

<blockquote> I '''recycle''' my own semen, because, uh, you know, yes I do masturbate.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Captain%27s_Log,_Stardate_April_28th,_2009</ref> </blockquote>

Origin: Chris, having very little knowledge of how the male reproductive system works, thinks that men can run out of sperm from masturbating or orgasming too much. Fearing the loss of "potential children", Chris actually thinks that by ingesting the sperm back into his body, his sperm count will stay in balance, thus, he is "recycling" it.

</blockquote>

;reeb
[[Image:4centgarbagereeb.jpg|thumb|Glug! Glug! Glug!]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' beer or any other alcoholic beverage of the like.

<blockquote>''Then he glugs his '''reeb''', heh-heh, and then he conks out.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_8_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, thinking he's so [[Slow-in-the-minds|clever]], decided to censor any mention of the word "beer" in his comics, by spelling the word backward.</blockquote>

;Resident-Evil refrigerator

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The refrigerator in the previous Chandler Household.

<blockquote>''Kitchen very much blocked off all over... with the '''Resident Evil refrigerator''' right there.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Tour_of_Chris%27s_House_II</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris refers to the fridge as the "Resident Evil" kind, because in Japan, the game ''Resident Evil'' is known as ''Biohazard''.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Tour_of_Chris%27s_House_II</ref><ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Resident_Evil</ref> Considering the quality of the household, that name may very well fit the description of the fridge in the state it was in before filming the [[Tour of Chris's House II|Second House Tour]].</blockquote>

;romps in the hay

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' sexual intercourse

<blockquote>''This page, by the way, was drawn before last March, so stuff Has Happened since then, it is all good. Go ahead and Muck It Up in your heads, Trolls; I Am BiSexual, and I Laugh at your Jokes. (Awesome Romps in the hay with him, as well as Cryzel)''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/July_2018_social_media_posts#BronyCon_thoughts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris has used this term since at least 2018.
</blockquote>

;[[Rosechu (species)|Rosechu]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The female counterpart of the [[Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon]].</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: Derived from the appropriately named first Rosechu of CWCville, [[Rosechu]]. The name of the species is a portmanteau of the last name of the ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog]]'' character, Amy Rose, and "Raichu", the evolved form of a Pikachu.</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== S ==
|-
|

;[[saga]]
<blockquote>1 ''(noun)'' An ongoing event within Chris' life.

<blockquote>''A Sonichu Special: CWC's Love Quest '''Saga'''''</blockquote>

Origin: Chris was actually the first to use the term "saga" as Christorians know it today, using it as such when describing his Love Quest on the cover of [[Sonichu 4]]. It wasn't until the Miyamota Saga when the term was used by Christorians to describe ongoing events in Chris' life as we know it.</blockquote>

;salty
<blockquote>1 ''(adjective)'' showing more maturity or coarseness than is expected, especially knowledge of [[honest]] topics like [[Chris and sex|sex]].

<blockquote>''Ah, but I am not the weak person they think I am; I am much, much '''saltier'''!''<ref>[[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu'' #4]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Based upon a line from "Bowling Girls", ninth episode of ''[[Excel Saga]]'': "But I'm not the sweet little girl I was a few minutes ago! I'm much, much saltier now!" "Salty" in this context derives from naval lingo, since the most experienced sailors would have greater exposure to both the saltwater seas and worldly experiences.
</blockquote>

;[[Scale of Respect|scale of respect]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Chris's way of measuring his respect for other people.

<blockquote>''I'll consider knocking you and Susan up my '''Scale of Respect''' each by 2 points''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Scale_of_Respect</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris, like most other autistics, tends to view the world based on numerical values due to their lack of understanding of certain abstract concepts such as respect. Because of this, Chris made his very own numerical scale to decide on who should be respected, compared to who shouldn't.</blockquote>

;seinor
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Misspelling of senior.

<blockquote>''A cool Junior or '''Seinor'''-Year student, and follow their example on asking others out''<ref>[[CWC Blog]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An example of how the “i before e rule” escapes Chris.

</blockquote>

;self-epic
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' describing a situation which is epic, and at the same time related to Chris and his various clones.

<blockquote>''And I will square-off in the TRULY '''SELF-EPIC''' Battle between me, and my Dark Half.''<ref>[[An Important Update]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: [[Chris and his Ego|Self-explanatory]].</blockquote>
</blockquote>

;self-masturbation
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' [[Mass debating|masturbation]].

<blockquote>'''''Self-masturbation''' is really arduous and annoying.''<ref name=15min>[[Masturbation discussions]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris decided to add the prefix "self-" to make it clear that he was stroking his own [[duck]], apparently unaware that use of said prefix is redundant (the term masturbation typically implies self-pleasure unless one specifies otherwise).</blockquote>
</blockquote>

;self-sexually active
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' in the habit of [[Mass debating|masturbating]].

<blockquote>''And Another Thing, yes, I will admit I was '''self-sexually active'''; WAS. You all turned me off of Sex LONG Before I even thought of coming out as Trans in ‘14.''<ref>[[February 2020 social media posts#On seeing his father's penis]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A modification of "sexually active".</blockquote>
</blockquote>

;ship
[[File:Chillaxingcard.jpg|200px|thumb|An example of a "shipping".]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An act of two or more OCs interacting with or performing any given action towards one another, regardless of any romantic feelings.

<blockquote>''You must take a Pony card from the grid and reattach it elsewhere with this '''Ship'''. That card's power activates. At the end of the turn, until the Pony card attached with this '''Ship''' is discarded of removed from the grid, it gains the Keyword Villain.''<ref>[https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:EpicOnlineBully.jpeg]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An abbreviation of the word "relationship". Chris learned the term from the card game ''[[Twilight Sparkle's Secret Shipfic Folder]]'', a My Little Pony fan game satirizing the popular internet trend of shipping. He used the game as another creative medium to sell items to fans, trolls, weens, and enablers.</blockquote>
</blockquote>

;shitful
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' hurtful; defamitory.

<blockquote>''And this is the last time I will ever say anything in response to your '''shitful''' and hurtful comments and hatred for Hate's Sake!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2014_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Shitful is a vulgar slang word, synonymous with words like "boat-load" or "truck-load". Chris may have seen the "shit" part of this word and assumed that it was a more profane version of "hateful". Disregarding its actual meaning, the word to Chris is used for situations that seem "shitty" to him.</blockquote>

;[[SLGBTQ]]

<blockquote>1. ''(acronym)'' an extended acronym for LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender) which includes "straights" and "questioning people".

<blockquote>''Considering your logo there, Texas will be feeling more love from the '''SLGBTQ''' community; give us props and Love, Lone Star State.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/September_2017_tweets#Hurricane_Harvey_and_SLGBT</ref></blockquote>

Origin: When Chris first used this acronym, he didn't explain what groups the "S" or "Q" were supposed to represent, making plenty of people confused. Eventually, Chris revealed that the "S" represents '''s'''traight and cis-gender people, while "Q" represents "'''q'''ueers" or "'''q'''uestioning people". Chris believes that if he included straight people into LGBT, then those particular people would feel more invited to join into the community. Considering the fact that gay people are minorities, adding the "S" to LGBT only defeats the entire purpose of identifying people as LGBT in the first place.</blockquote>

;[[Slow-in-the-minds|slow-in-the-mind]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' a mentally handicapped person

<blockquote>''And finally, after a hard "odd" day, he rides home on a bus, but unfortunately, it had a few "'''slow-in-the-minds'''" on it.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/A_Week_With_Christian_Chandler></ref></blockquote>

Origin: While the exact origin of the term is unknown, slow-in-the-minds was first used by Chris in a high school assignment.<ref>[[Manchester High Leaks#Help This Unborn Child]]</ref> "Slow-in-the-minds" works as a stand in for the less-socially-acceptable "retard", so it's possible that Chris created this CWC-ism in order to self-censor.

</blockquote>

;slow-minded

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' mentally retarded

<blockquote>''As for what had happened during PVCC, in a nutshell; about Mid-Summer, 2003, I've realize upon revolation that I needed a girl friend to make into a Sweetheart from the Ground-Up, so with a sign (which I've later realized that it made me look '''slow-minded'''; the "R" Word), I've started my Enduring Love Quest.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Chris_emails_2007#February</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''OK, I can definitely name you a few reasons, like there was this one [stutters] …there was this one '''slow-minded''' individual named Tony. He was like as big as-he was as big and strong as an ox. He just kept on making all the moanings and noises and whatnot, and he sometimes even-even-a couple of times he even spat on me, and he even bopped me on the back of the head once or twice during the whole-during the whole time I knew him there.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Kacey_Call_9</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(adjective)'' stupid, but not quite retarded

<blockquote> ''I'll admit I have had some '''slow-minded''' moments. But I am certainly not totally retarded.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call#Crossing_the_Na.C3.AFve_Line_.281:46:21-1:52:36.29</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;SNERGEN FLERGEN!!!
[[Image:SNERGEN FLERGEN!.PNG|thumb|200px]]
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' A phrase one may shout out when asked for attendance.

<blockquote>'''''SNERGEN FLERGEN!!!'''''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic9P6.jpg</ref>
''-What?''

''Uh...here!''
</blockquote>

Origin: An obvious example of Chris's [[CWC-isms#R|random-access humor]]. This weird phrase appeared in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], when the cast was asked for their attendance during a [[CWC-isms#D|Dating Education]] class. When [[Wild Sonichu]] was asked for his attendance, he blurted out this phrase as Chris's many attempts to be funny in his comics. Given Chris's childish sense of humor, it would make a whole lot of sense for him to include a character randomly blurt out a nonsensical phrase out of nowhere.</blockquote>

;snooze cruise
<blockquote>1. a long period of slumber

<blockquote> ''Next, he had Trigonometry...I'd hate to be Christian when his nerves kicked into action after waking up from a "notey" '''snooze cruise''', but I was.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/A_Week_With_Christian_Chandler</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from ''[[Wikipedia:Sonic Adventure|Sonic Adventure]]''.

</blockquote>

;somecummpentydifferent
<blockquote>1. ''(Phrase)'' Used to announce a change in subject.

<blockquote>''Anyway and now for somecummpentydifferent stay tuned for '''somecummpentydifferent''' — a bunch of good pushups!''<ref>[[Getting Foam Ed]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(Phrase)'' Used to announce use of [[random-access humor]].

<blockquote>''And now for '''somecummpentydifferent'''. BUUUUNG! And now it's Monty Python's flying elephants. Du tu du tu du tu du. Du tu du tu du tu du. Johan, why is people running away? I don't know, Greeg, why is people running away.''<ref>[[CWCFlyingElephants]]. Note this is the very first thing he says, so there's nothing to be completely different ''from''.</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris is trying to say "And now for something completely different" like John Cleese does on [[Monty Python]]. Suffice to say Cleese's ability to say three multisyllabic words in rapid succession exceeds that of Chris.</blockquote>

;[[Tobacky|somkey]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' The quality of having smoked recreationally, be it tobacco, marijuana, or some other substance.

<blockquote>''Thank our mayor, Mr. Christian Weston Chandler that CWCville is a clean city; nobody has to go home drunk or '''somkey'''!''<ref>[[Sonichu 8]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A simple corruption of the word 'Smokey', used by [[Jamsta Sonichu]] and [[Lolisa Rosechu]] during their report on [[Sonichu 8#Spring Break, 2008!|Spring Break, 2008!]].
</blockquote>

;[[Sonichu (species)|Sonichu]]
<blockquote>1. (noun) The male counterpart of the Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: Derived from the appropriately named first Sonichu of CWCville, Sonichu. The name of the species is a portmanteau of the name of the titular character of ''Sonic the Hedgehog'', Sonic, and "Pikachu".</blockquote>

;soo
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' Very, Very much.

<blockquote>''Dear Blanca, I am '''soo''' happy that you were revealed as my True, Honest Sweetheart-To-Be''<ref>[[Chris's Letter to Blanca]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In writing, Chris often adds extra o's to the word "so" to prolong the "o" sound and show added emphasis. This has the (unintentional?) effect of mimicking the speech patterns of a Valley Girl or an effeminate homosexual. However, where most people would add two or more o's, (e.g., "I love you sooo much!"), Chris frequently only adds one, resulting in "soo," which makes the word look like it's supposed to be pronounced "sue".

This may originate from pamphlets published by [http://www.channing-bete.com/ Channing Bete], [[Autism|short and uninformative]] self-help pamphlets often handed out at churches, the last page of which often feature a summary headlined by "Soo…" Given his distrust of help from anyone other than [[Rocky]], it is not entirely impossible that Chris has read Channing Bete pamphlets occasionally.

This is one of many recurring jokes in the [[Sonichu Audiobooks]] in which the narrator pronounces words like "soo" as they are literally spelled, instead of how Chris intended them to be read.
</blockquote>

;soul-bonding
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Sexual intercourse as a means of purifying someone.

<blockquote>What had happened was Literally a Divine Mission, commissioned to Christine and I by Emanuel (GOD above Gods), herself, to Heal and Cleanse Barbara's health and soul and being and Clear her of remaining sins and regrets through Coddling, Talking, and Supportive '''Soul Bonding''' to mainly Extend her Life, personally by Divine Intervention.<ref>[[Jail Letter - 4 October 2021]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris has somehow come under the delusion that having sex with his mother would "purify" her, and extend her lifetime, all through the act of bonding each other's souls.

</blockquote>

;soup beds
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Homeless shelter with beds

<blockquote>'' I mean, we have soup kitchens and we have '''soup beds'''. We should really combine the two into SOUP HOTELS!''<ref>[[A Public Announcement for Congress]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris tries to distill his "soup hotel" idea into its two components, but he mangles one of them by retaining the "soup" prefix.
</blockquote>

;sourdough region
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The crotch area

<blockquote>''Its weak point is still the '''sourdough region''', but it would take FIVE KICKS to get to it''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_4_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In his Sonichu comics, Chris has decided to make the main weakness of the jerkops their crotch. The weakest of the jerkops take only one kick to be taken down, while higher-ranking jerkops, such as [[Jerkhief]] take five. The reason why Chris refers to this spot as the "sourdough region" is unknown, but most of his other CWC-isms already tend to sound so nonsensical to begin with, it barely even matters.</blockquote>

;spike on one's shoulder
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' refers to the act of holding grievances towards someone.

<blockquote>''There was a whole bunch of misunderstandings between me and my employer, and he had a '''spike on his shoulder''' against me.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Father_Call</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A confusion with the phrase "chip on one's shoulder".</blockquote>

;spot
<blockquote> 1. ''(noun)'' A small amount.

<blockquote>''the recent 43.98 purchase was actually a ''spot'' of Wheeling and Dealing I did; I actually spent less to make a profit.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jackie_E-mails_15</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris likes to retardedly incorporate British English into his sentences when he has the chance, possibly to sound more classy than he actually is. The phrase "A spot of X" is a British English idiom referring to a small amount of something.</blockquote>

;sticky dream
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A wet dream

<blockquote>''After falling back asleep Chris had a "'''sticky dream'''."''<ref>[[Ivy Q&A]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris claims that a "wet dream" actually refers to wetting one's bed as opposed to nocturnal emission.
</blockquote>

;straight path
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The quality of being heterosexual and cisgender

<blockquote>''And, besides, if you stray away from the '''straight path''', it can really jeopardize the entire future of the world and the human race.<ref>[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]]''</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Before the [[Tomgirl Saga]], Chris had an intense fear of "falling off the straight path". When he states this, he is essentially referring to being on the path to straightness, in the same way a normal person would refer to someone being on the path to success. Chris also had this unrealistic idea that being in contact with gay men would suddenly make him gay too, which would therefore make him fall off the path. Possibly also an allusion to the phrase "straight and narrow" and/or the Biblical passage Matthew 7:14: "Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it."</blockquote>

</blockquote>
;[[Sub-Episodes|sub-episode]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The side stories in the [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]] comics.</blockquote>

<blockquote>Origin: A result of Chris' use of [[Chris and English#Television jargon|television jargon]] in his comics.</blockquote>

;sumbah
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Minced oath for "son of a bitch."

<blockquote>''Yo, Christian, thanks for saving my sister from that crazy '''sumbah'''''<ref>[[Sonichu Special 4]], page K-4</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Probably based upon "sumbitch."
</blockquote>

;[[Sweetbolt|sweetbolt]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A pet name used by [[CWC-isms#E|Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]].

<blockquote>''Ahh..that salad was great! What's wrong '''sweetbolt'''?''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP11.htm</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' A sweetheart.

<blockquote>''I understand, and I will NEVER put it against you. Yes, as your '''SweetBolt'''. :)?''<ref>https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/SchuComicP11.htm</ref></blockquote>

Origin: When Chris first worked on his Sonichu comics, he tried to incorporate as many references to electricity as he can, in order to match with the Pikachu part of the titular character. A portmanteau of the CWC-ism "sweetheart" and "bolt".
</blockquote>

;[[Sweetheart|sweetheart]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A potential lover.

<blockquote>''Oh, gee, I'm sorry Bionic, but back then I was na- I was naive on dating and all that, so I just didn't think of it at the time. But if you a '''sweetheart''', Meg has created quite a few foxy characters. If she's cool with it, you could go out with one of them.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu_6_Official_Videobook</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Another cutesy pet name given to candidates of his Love Quest.</blockquote>

;[[Sweetheart from the Ground-Up|sweetheart from the ground-up]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An ideal sweetheart beyond the friend zone.

<blockquote>''For days to weeks to months to years, I Felt So Lonesome and Incomplete. But I didn't STOP! In the name of Love, and the fact that there had to be a Boyfriend-Free Girl out there, somewhere, for me to get to know, grow a strong companionship with and make into a '''Sweetheart from the Ground-Up''', so in later years, after the inevitability of my parents leaving me, I WON'T BE ALONE. And I can eventually realize my dream of being a good husband, and father of a pretty girl named Crystal.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days</ref></blockquote>

Origin: As stated, Chris intended to use this weird phrase to indicate that he wants an ideal gal-pal well beyond the friend zone. Chris thought this phrase sounded so clever, that he used it constantly.</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== T ==
|-
|

;teenages

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The 13-19 age group; teenage years.

<blockquote>''Ahem... hello, ladies and gentlemen, girls and boys, and dudes of all '''teenages''', as well as the, uh, gals.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In Chris's [[Future Message]], he attempts to talk down to just about every age group. In order to do this, he starts his video off with the quote above. Chris clearly couldn't think of a way to refer to teenagers, so he decided to refer to such people by "teenages". A butchering of "people of all ages".</blockquote>

;teir
[[File:Teir.png|thumb|200|Chris spelling tier wrong.]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Misspelling of tier.

<blockquote>''$1 '''Teir'''''<ref>[[Patreon]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Yet another example of how Chris is unaware of “i before e”. In a June 2019 update, he managed to spell tier wrong throughout multiple descriptions, despite the correctly-spelled word being visible right on the page.</blockquote>

;telekinesis

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Telepathy, i.e. communication through long distances, usually via psychic or supernatural means.

<blockquote>''I’ve been communicating with her through '''telekinesis''', and she sounded very lonesome.''<ref>[[Silvana]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Whereas tele'''kine'''sis means ''moving'' objects from a distance with psychic powers (c.f. ''[[wikipedia:kinetic energy|kinetic]]''), Chris has never used the term properly. [[Magi-Chan|Psychic]] [[Silvana|characters]] in the [[comic]] have both powers of telekinesis and telepathy, but Chris has only used the former to refer to both.
</blockquote>

;Temple

<blockquote>1. [[14 Branchland Court|Chris's house]].
<blockquote>''Food for Barbara is also appreciated, and Visitors who personally offer genuine Kindness and Good Intentions are all encouraged to visit the '''Temple'''.''<ref>[[Jail Letter - 4 October 2021]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In [[2019]] Chris designated his house as the "Temple of CWC Sonichu" due to his growing [[Messiah complex]].
</blockquote>

;That was a straw that sold the blade to the executioner

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' That was the final straw.

<blockquote>''And on top of that, literally doxing someone on [[Kiwi Farms|Kiwi]], because someone has a hold over [[Bismuth|Naught]] to the point of him having to feel very insecure about himself. And the topper, in my eyes, one of y'all sent threats to [[Praetor|Anni]]. Fortunately, she completely missed and overlooked that memo in her inbox. '''That was a straw that sold the blade to the executioner'''.''<ref>[[MKR DMs]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used the phrase in listing his grievances against some members of the [[Watchmen]].
</blockquote>

;theoretical ex

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' One of the trolls who posed as a potential love interest for Chris during the classic period of trolling, between 2008 and 2011; a catfish, generally-speaking.

<blockquote>''Yeah, it’s like, you know, even when I try to make a new relationship, uh, especially among the '''theoretical rex-, exes''' I had, I still could not tell which was which…''<ref>[[Catie Date Conversation Transcript#Chris's history with the trolls]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris started calling the trolls who pretended to be his girlfriends during the classic era "theoretical exes" around the time of his date with [[Catherine|Catie]]. When pressed by Cousin Al as to what he meant, he cited that people may not always be who they say they are on the Internet.
</blockquote>

;This Viral Event

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' The worldwide Coronavirus ([[COVID-19]], SARS-CoV-2) outbreak in early [[2020]], which began in [[China]] on New Year's Eve [[2019]] and has since become the most severe pandemic since the Spanish flu of 1918. Regarded by Chris as a trivial excuse to cancel a perfectly good ''[[My Little Pony]]'' convention.

<blockquote>''The Bottom Line is that '''This Viral Event''' is actually a better step in our own developments and evolution, as well as a deity-level test to sort out the weak from the moderate and strong of mental and soulful intervals, and nothing else.<ref>[[March 2020 social media posts#Chris finally weighs in on the coronavirus pandemic]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris's [[Chris and religion|theodicy]] assigns any misfortune in the world to the Dimensional Merge. As the disease's spread has caused many governments to forbid large gatherings as a sanitary measure, it has become a [[Chris and His Ego|personal inconvenience to Chris]]. He believes that the pandemic will soon be stopped by [[OC|fictional characters]]' efforts,<ref>[March 2020 social media posts#COVID-19 a sign of dimensional merge]</ref> making it nothing but a transient event.</blockquote>

;[[Tobacky|tobacky]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' tobacco or tobacco products

<blockquote>''If I could, I would take every last ounce of '''tobacky''', put 'em on a rocket, and shoot 'em up to the Moon.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler%27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE</ref></blockquote>

Origin: American English slang, used by Chandlers since 1856,<ref>https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/tobacky#English</ref> and for [[random access humor]] since 1928.<ref>[http://www.uwosh.edu/home_pages/faculty_staff/earns/song.html Back in Nagasaki Where the Fellers Chew Tobaccy]</ref> Chris hates the act of smoking cigarettes so much that even uttering the word "tobacco" makes him feel uncomfortable, so Chris uses this as a retarded [[wikipedia:minced oath|minced oath]].<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica</ref></blockquote>

;tom-tom
[[File:Duck Pounding Some Tom-Tom.jpeg|thumb|A duck pounding some tom-tom real hard]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' female genitalia.

<blockquote>''MY DUCK HUNGERS FOR '''TOM-TOM''' TO POUND!!!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/I_Am_The_TRUE,_Original_CCWC</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from the short Adult Swim music video, ''Pound my Tom-Tom'', which served as the intro to the cartoon, ''Lucy, the Daughter of the Devil''.<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r1DVoH0Njow</ref> Considering Chris barely understands anything adult, the fact that this was meant to be a bad euphemism, which the character, Lucy, used to avoid directly mentioning her vagina, flew over his head.</blockquote>

;[[Tomgirl Pictures|tomgirl]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A femboy, which is a person who identifies as male though still cross dresses.

<blockquote>''I am '''Tomgirl'''.''<ref>[[:File:I_am_tomgirl.jpg|PSN comment as of 6 April 2011]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: analogous to "tomboy", i.e. a girl who likes boy-stuff.

</blockquote>

;too many crooks

<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' Expression of dissatisfaction with an overabundance of evildoers.

<blockquote>''Well, call it--this was "too many crooks." '''Too many crooks!''' Too many crooks! And that ED page is one of those crooks.''<ref>[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Based upon the idiom, "too many cooks spoil the broth," although that idiom means something, whereas this is just an incomplete sentence.
</blockquote>

;took my idea for a fall

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Refers to ruining Chris's [[Love Quest]] plans.

<blockquote>''I am very mad and upset, because that JERK took my idea for a fall, just like that XXXXX at PVCC did!''<ref>[[CWC%27s Diary#2004]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris used this in his poem [[Saddest Heart in the World]] as well as a 2004 diary entry. Appears to be a mangling of "took me for a fool."</blockquote>

;triage

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' ménage à trois; a romantic relationship between three people.

<blockquote>''Magi-Chan Sonichu, Silvana Rosechu & Mewtwo / A Loving '''Triage'''''<ref>[[January 2018 Facebook posts‎‎#Mewtwo and Magi-Chan married]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A corruption or misspelling of "triad", possibly influenced by the ending of "ménage". "[[wikipedia:Triage|Triage]]" is a real word with a completely different meaning and unrelated etymology.
</blockquote>

;trollin' stupid

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Very stupid, in a manner pertaining to trolling.

<blockquote>''Because that's what you deserve, you God damn womanizing raping... '''trollin' stupid''' pickle suited... nigger!''<ref>[[Chris Drops the N-Bomb]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris seems to have coined this phrase for his [[CWC "Boyfriend"|"Boyfriend"]] lyrics with "trollin'" serving as an intensifier along the lines of "fucking."
</blockquote>

;true and honest

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' something [[Honest content|honest]].

<blockquote>''I like sharing my honest feelings with other people because they're good feelings, most of the time. And more importantly they are '''true and honest''' feelings. SO THERE.''<ref>[[For Chris]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris first used the adjective with reference to his love for [[PandaHalo]], and the adjective was often used by [[Liquid Chris]].
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== U ==
|-
|

;ugly growth

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used by Chris to refer to his own penis negatively.

<blockquote>''"Did I not just tell you I am Seven Inches Long?! It is soo long, that I am literally able to stretch it Under my taint, and tuck it between my own ass cheeks, beyond my ass hole. With help, I can literally even shove the head of the '''Ugly Growth''' Up Mine!"''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Colin_Chat_2</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;[[Un-clit|un-clit]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A piercing Chris got on his perrinium as an immitation clitoris.

<blockquote>''It is a short, steel straight piece with steel spheres, of which I refer to them as my '''un-clit'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Un-clit</ref></blockquote>

Origin: During his Tomgirl years, Chris was, and still is, very desperate to gain female body traits such as bigger breasts, wider hips, a fully functioning vagina, etc. In order to get a part of the work done, Chris got a piercing on his taint as a sort of pseudo-clitoris, showing more of Chris's limited knowledge of female anatomy. </blockquote>

;uncouth
[[File:Uncouth Twat.png|thumb|Most uncouth!]]
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' unlikeable, lacking good manners.

<blockquote>''And, by the way, among which, You give the Males a Most Terrible and Horrible Name in your behavior. Most '''Uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Colin_Chat_1</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''Trump is most Immature, '''Uncouth''', and Not Valid to be president.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Misc_E-mails#Anti-Pmurt</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I felt it appropriate to change my profile photo back to the filtered one for what happened in France the while back with due respect of the continuing of Trump's most drastic and '''uncouth''' actions in office.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/January_2017_Facebook_Posts</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''You, sir, are '''Uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/2017_tweets#Trump.2C_you_mocked_the_mentally-challenged</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''All of you are nothing but immature, borish, '''uncouth''', and damned Neanderthals.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonic_Boom_Protests#Chris_Rages_On</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''Not Sexual Fantasy; Friendships, You '''Uncouth''' Cad. Hmpf!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2017_tweets#Unleashing_his_inner_Brit</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''And as it Had been My fault on that #NationalGirlfriendTweet that started the whole mess, that was Why I chose whole-heartedly to Harass Me instead of Doopie or Anyone Else who was being harassed with the mis-content from Years Ago from me taken Out Of Context, Mind you, because Harassing Anyone at Anyone else’s Expense is Just Plain Wrong, Bullying, and '''Uncouth'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/October_2017_tweets</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote> ''And it was ignored by you that Talulah Bankhead coined the term for Tabitha, you '''Uncouth''' Twat.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/August_2017_tweets#Tabitha_addresses_CWC_flame_war</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I agree it is shameful of these people to have accounts just to haze at me and all others, Soo '''uncouth'''.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/NightStar2891_tweets#Twitter_spam_for_Tabitha</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I miss Jessica. You Trolls Scared Her Off by either Hacking or Reporting her Facebook. You '''Uncouth''' Cads!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jessica_Quinn</ref></blockquote>

Origin: As demonstrated, Chris uses this word way more than any 21st-century [[American]] would. It is often speculated that Chris picked up this word from an ''MLP'' episode, where Applebloom and Applejack are talking about what the word "uncouth" means.<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S-SrQ-Oz1k4</ref> Seeing how this conversation alone is somehow a staple in the Brony subculture, and how Chris is one of those Bronies who sees more [[Night_Star#Chris_spills_the_beans|meaning]] in the show than it actually possesses, Chris likely picked up this term due to how foreign and smart it sounded to him.

Chris is also notorious for his use of British English whenever he tries to make it seem he knows what he's talking about. So it is also fairly likely Chris may have adapted this word solely because he thinks British English words will make him sound smarter.
</blockquote>

;[[UNGA-WUNGA]]
<blockquote>1. ''(interjection)'' A sexual chant from the [[Cherokian Clan]].
<blockquote>''There is no quote to directly cite the use of this CWC-ism. This CWC-ism was used in one of Chris' art pieces appropriately named "UNGA-WUNGA"''</blockquote>
Origin: Comes from a horrifying art piece Chris drew of himself banging [[Jackie]] against a tree while a group of Cherokians masturbate to their orgy.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Unga_Wunga_Time.jpg</ref> As for the questionably racist phrase itself, Chris simply stated that it was "just a random phrase I randomly picked for the natives to chant as they jerked off."<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Jackie_E-mails_11</ref></blockquote>

;unto
<blockquote>1. ''(preposition)'' Archaic or poetic form of the word "to".

<blockquote>''Now that it has been made fully clear to me, I am now able to devote myself fully '''unto''' you, Julie.''<ref>[[BlueSpike Skype Logs 7]]</ref></blockquote>
<blockquote>''I am very devastated, due to my SHATTERED HEART that [[Mary Lee Walsh|XXXXX]] caused '''unto''' me!''</blockquote>

Origin: Another one of Chris's autistic ways of sounding smart, possibly in imitation of the Bible. (c.f. ''[[Chris and hypocrisy|Do unto others...]]''). Chris uses this form more frequently than most English speakers of the 21st century should, even when it sounds unwieldy.
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== V ==
|-
|
;vaginatables

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' female genitalia

<blockquote>''There is no quote to cite the use of this CWC-ism. Chris used this CWC-ism in an e-mail address "ILuvVaginatables@aol.com".''</blockquote>

Origin: A strange hybrid of the words "vagina" and "vegetables", purely for Random-Access Humor.</blockquote>

;vege-marmite

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Vegemite

<blockquote>''Certainly not a '''vege-marmite''' sanwich. Lol''<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-372</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A retarded pun made by Chris to state his distaste for veggie marmite. Coincidentally, vegemite is essentially marmite, yeast extract from brewing beer turned into a pungent, salty paste, with vegetables and spices added in.<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vegemite</ref></blockquote>

;vestite

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A transvestite person.

<blockquote>''"That is the difference between Trans Gender and '''Vestites'''; ID as the other sex, and dressing like it, respectively"''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/random-chris-updates.23605/page-335#post-2635076]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In the above post, Chris intended to write the words "transgender" and "transvestite" in the same sentence without duplicating the trans suffix. He did so by adding a space between the prefix and the respective endings. It is worth mentioning that "Vestite" is a word in Latin, and simply refers to being clothed, without any connotations regarding cross-dressing.</blockquote>

;[[Virgin with Rage|virgin with rage]]

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' An individual who is sexually frustrated

<blockquote>''Tell me why
I'm stuck as a '''virgin with rage'''!
Tell me why
I so need a cute girl my age!
Tell me why
I never wanna hear you say,
"I have a boyfriend!"''<ref>[[So Need a Cute Girl]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: The idea of being a virgin and not having a sweetheart was something that greatly upsetted Chris. He would throw tantrums after losing a potential sweetheart, and thus missing out on an opportunity to lose his virginity.</blockquote>

;[[Virginia is for virgins]]

<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase that pushes the idea that the citizens of Virginia won't allow Chris to get a girlfriend solely due to his autism.

<blockquote>"'''VIRGINIA IS FOR VIRGINS''', NOT LOVERS!"<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Story_of_My_Current_Days
</ref></blockquote>

Origin: An intentional butchering of the phrase "Virginia is for Lovers". His belief that the state of Virginia is behind some kind of conspiracy to prevent him from finding true love has started since attending [[PVCC]]. While there, Chris has gotten himself putting up Attraction Signs, loitering with said signs on campus, and even creating a [[Sonichu's News Dash|newsletter series]] in order to attract potential sweethearts. Seeing how all of this violated the school's rules and policies, he was sent directly to the [[Mary Lee Walsh|Dean]] in order for her to straighten him out.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Virginia_is_for_Virgins#Origins</ref> Of course, Chris took this to be another instance of him being discriminated, solely for being autistic. This, coupled with the fact that he's already failed on several occasions to actually get to date any of his his female friends in high school, reinforced this belief. </blockquote>

;VOTES FOR WOMEN!
[[Image:Ss03.jpg|thumb|Mrs. Banks, wearing the "Votes for Women" sash that Chris so blatantly misinterpreted.]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase shouted in protest of pictures depicting women with penises.

<blockquote>'''''VOTES FOR WOMEN''', STEP IN TIME! VOTES FOR WOMEN, STEP IN TIME! NEVER NEED A REASON, NEVER NEED A RHYME, VOTES FOR WOMEN, STEP IN TIME!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic8P52.jpg</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Taken from a sash Mrs. Banks, a character from [[Mary Poppins]], had worn. Chris clearly took this banner to simply refer to any kind of mistreatment towards women, rather than the fairly obvious implication that she's actually fighting for the right to vote.</blockquote>

<blockquote>''See Also'': [[CWC-isms#W|Women's Rights]]
</blockquote>

|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== W ==
|-
|

;Walter Grisby
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A man's name often employed in acts of random-access humor.

<blockquote>''"Is this '''Walter Grisby'''? Who threw a frisbee? Well you know what? DAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!"''<ref>[[Random-access humor]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' The retconned name of the character formerly known as [[Wes Iseli]].

Origin: Unknown; thought by some to be a reference to the Cartoon Network show ''Ed, Edd n Eddy''. A character in the PC game ''The Sims 3'' goes by the name of Walter Grisby, but the game's release post-dates Chris's first uses of the term by some years.
</blockquote>

; Warroir of Love
[[Image:WarriorOfLove.jpg|thumb|300px|History's greatest warroirs.]]
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' an advocate for spreading love and peace.

<blockquote>''"People! You do not understand! By Not blocking the Trolls, you are Promoting Hatred; They don't always side with Love. I Am '''Warroir of Love'''."''<ref>[[https://twitter.com/CWCSonichu/status/902236285389111297]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Misspelling of the word "warrior". Chris considers himself a "warrior of love" because he believes that he is the [[Chris and kindness|voice of kindness]]. Most likely derived from the derogatory term "Social Justice Warrior", a term used for individuals who advocate for social justice and equality.
</blockquote>

; water on the rocks
[[File:Water and Dasani.jpeg|thumb|200px|Literally a drink on the rocks.]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' water poured over Chris's [[magic stones]] for drinking.

<blockquote>''#DrinkWater; Filtered or Bottled, preferred; Quartz, Rose Quartz, or Amethyst optional to enjoy it '''on the rocks''' (held in place with aluminum wire).''<ref>[[March 2020 social media posts#watch anime to kill coronavirus]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''staying hydrated with more than 101.4 ounces of filtered '''water on the rocks''' within a #Glacce bottle''<ref>[[January 2021 social media posts#GFuel and meditation]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In accordance with his [[Magical thinking|New Age]] beliefs, Chris purchased a Glacce water bottle for $80+, which features a crystal display set inside. He later placed one of his [[magic stones]] into it, crudely held in by aluminum wire, and refers to drinking from the bottle as "water on the rocks."
</blockquote>

;well-breasted
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Having large breasts.

<blockquote>''And her image dawned upon me in my imagination, starting out as the '''well-breasted''' pink electric-hedgehog (Pok'emon) with the long Raichu-like tail, I drew her outfit onto her in red and Battery-Charged Blue.''<ref>{{CWCipedia link|Rosechu|CWCipedia article on Rosechu}}</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Confusion between "well-endowed" and "large-breasted".

</blockquote>

;witching hours
<blockquote> 1. ''(noun)'' The time between midnight and 4 AM that Chris cannot fall asleep during.

<blockquote>'' I know that I'm gonna be more effective with the '''witching hours''' during the night once again, whether I'm asleep or not, okay.<ref>[[Animated Everfree Message]]</ref>
</blockquote>
Origin: May have been picked up from Chris's increasing interest in the [[Magical thinking|occult]]. Generally, the phrase refers to the midnight hours, with the term being inspired by the ancient belief that supernatural events, like witches, demons, and ghosts, are at their most powerful at midnight. Chris adopted the phrase in reference to his [[Biological clock|unusual sleep schedule]].

''See Also:'' [[CWC-isms#B|biological clock]]
</blockquote>

;Woahly
<blockquote> 1. ''(interjection)'' Expression indicating surprise.
<blockquote>'' Who is it Rosey? The Stew's almost ready and I... '''Woahly'''..!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Sonichu15-2019draft-p11.png</ref>
</blockquote>
Origin: Portmanteau of "woah" and "holy... (as in the beginning of saying holy shit)," found in [[Sonichu 15]].
</blockquote>

;woman up
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' The female equivalent of manning up.

<blockquote>''Fellow autistic people! I encourage you to man and '''woman up''' [Subtitle: "It is Socializing In Real Life or Dust!"] respectively! Go out into the real world, and make real friends with full, great quality friendships! Do it now!''</blockquote>

Origin: Used in the second part of Chris’s Autism Tutorial, where he insultingly attempts to rally up all autistic people (regardless of their functionality) to form proper friendships, all while missing the point of “manning up”.
</blockquote>

;[[Women's rights]] (or Women's Lib)
<blockquote>
1. ''(noun)'' Any kind of behavior towards women that does not involve abusing them physically or mentally.

<blockquote>''Christian Weston Chandler, A Man For The Women, For the '''Women's Rights''', For the Women's Justice, For the Women's Peace.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Other_documents</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' The right for women to not be depicted with a [[CWC-isms#P|pickle]].

<blockquote>''FOR OUR '''RIGHTS AS WOMEN''' AMONG ALL PEOPLE, I WILL OVERPOWER THOSE SLANDEROUS JERKS!!!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic8P58.jpg</ref></blockquote>

3. ''(noun)'' The act of women protesting by stripping down naked.

<blockquote>''Well, once we get our centerfolds shot and uploaded, hopefully those bastards will see and admire our beautiful lights.''</blockquote>

<blockquote>''Yeah, and if nothing else, we can still have a lot of fun trying.''</blockquote>

<blockquote>''With our lord's support in our peaceful protest, we can win this fight.''</blockquote>

<blockquote>''Victory for '''Women's Lib'''''.<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:SchuComic8P51.jpg</ref>
</blockquote>

Origin: Chris's understanding of sexism is botched up beyond belief. His zeal towards the rights of women is believed to have originated from watching the 1964 Disney film, Mary Poppins. He was particularly influenced by Mrs. Banks, who has expressed distaste for unequal treatment for women in 1910 London. As to be expected, Chris missed the point of this part of her character, and instead used this in order to justify his treatment towards the women he meets. Chris also believed that the term "sexism" only applies to forms of violence against women, and not necessarily representing in a condescending manner.

</blockquote>

;wooden nickel
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Acoustic guitar.

<blockquote>''I got the idea of the challenge from him COPYING me playing Boston's "More Than A Feeling" on Guitar Hero on his old '''Wooden Nickel'''; if he wants to copy on Guitar, he may as well be challenged in a Sing-Off.''<ref>[[Katie Bay E-mails 3]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In real life, a wooden nickel is a now defunct form of currency used during the Great Depression. His use probably refers to the phrase "don't take any wooden nickels" - that is, he is calling the acoustic guitar a semi-worthless imitation of his Guitar Hero controller.
</blockquote>

;worse
<blockquote>1. ''(adverb)'' Severely; extremely, in an adverse manner

<blockquote>''IMHO, having Seinor Citizens for Parents throughout your whole life is no picnic; they are '''WORSE''' Overprotective.''<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 6]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>

;worst mud, muck and bodily fluids

<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Mud, among [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|other disgusting things]].

<blockquote>''The DAMN Trolling-Stupids have manipulated me; smeared my once good name through the worst mud, muck, and bodily fluids.''<ref>June 2012 Facebook posts#Damn Michael Snyder</ref></blockquote>

Origin: First used by Chris in a June 2012 Facebook post ranting about that damn [[Michael Snyder]]. Refers to having his good name or reputation dragged through the mud, with "bodily fluids" added in an attempt to garner sympathy.
</blockquote>

|-
|
;wrath
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' Great [[Chris and anger|anger]] or rage. Considered one of the [[Chris and religion|Seven Deadly Sins]].

<blockquote>''Apparently, my, uh, heed of warning towards Vivian has gone unheard or otherwise SHE DID NOT REALIZE THE FURY OF MY '''WRATH'''''<ref>[[Sign Destruction Video]]</ref></blockquote>

2. ''(noun)'' Strength sufficient to lift an office chair.

<blockquote>''I HAAAVE THE POWEEERRRR!!! FEEL MY '''WRATH'''!!''<ref>[[Power]]</ref></blockquote>
</blockquote>
|}

{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

==X==
|-
|
;X2-checking
<blockquote>1. ''(verb)'' Double Checking
<blockquote>''Just '''X2-checking''' if you got the drawing I left you.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-11-2017-chris-spotted-at-bronycon.33187/page-35#post-2511049]]</ref></blockquote>
Origin: Comes from x2 meaning times two, which means double to Chris.</blockquote>

;XXX-tended
<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' Sexually explicit
<blockquote>''ESPECIALLY WITH ALL OF THE TRUTH BOMBS AND ROSEY ROSECHU's POST-INTERSEX-TO-FEMALE TRANSITION AND OPERATION NUDES IN THE '''XXX-TENDED''' CONTROVERSIAL VERSION OF MY BOOK NUMBER EIGHT IN 2008!''<ref>[[Jail_Letter - 20 October 2021#22 October]]</ref></blockquote>

</blockquote>
;XXXXX
<blockquote>1. ''(noun, censorship)'' censorship of the word "bitch"
<blockquote>''Mary Lee Walsh made it illegal to distribute the News Dash; I AM VERY ANGRY AT THAT '''XXXXX'''!''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/CWC%27s_Diary</ref></blockquote>
Origin: Chris's only instance of this peculiar censorship is in his [[diary]]. In it, Chris repeatedly refers to [[Mary Lee Walsh]] as an "XXXXX", clearly as a censorship of the word "bitch". Why Chris chose to replace all of the letters in the word with the capital letter "X", instead of using asterisks remains a mystery.</blockquote>

|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Y ==

</blockquote>
|-
|
;y'all should know me by now
|-
|<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' An introduction to complete strangers.

<blockquote>'''''Y'all should know me by now''', but if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of Sonichu, the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon, back on March 17th, 2000.''<ref name=csm/></blockquote>
Origin: His second message on YouTube, addressed to the ED trolls. He would use it several more times after this, possibly making this into his tagline. The introduction is made under the assumption that Chris is [[Chris and his Ego|already well-known]]. May have been partially derived from ''[[The Adventures of The American Rabbit]]'', where a character similarly begins a speech by saying, "You all know me."
</blockquote>

</blockquote>

;yea and merrily
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' A phrase used to open videos where Chris is feeling [[Messiah complex|messianic]].

<blockquote>'''''Yea and merrily''' to everyone. Welcome to this.''<ref>[[Jesus Christ Chan Sonichu Prime Resurrected and Returned]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''Hey everybody! '''Yea and merrily'''.''<ref>[[Simple Existential Q&A]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: A stupid play on "yea, verily", an antiquated phrase meaning "yes, truly", often assumed to have been said by Jesus in the {{w|King James Version}} of the Bible. Although the word "verily" is often used by Jesus in the King James Version, the phrase "yea, verily" never actually appears anywhere in the King James Bible. It does, however, appear in the {{w|Book of Mormon}}.
</blockquote>

;young at heart

<blockquote>1. ''(noun, attributive)'' An individual with childlike characteristics; a childish person.

<blockquote>''Hello Nintendo! Welcome to my Animal Crossing for Nintendo GameCube. I am your host. My name is Christian Weston Chandler. I live in Ruckersville, Virginia and I is [sic] 21 years old and I play because I am '''young at heart'''. So anyway we are going to take a tour of my ci-ty...in Animal Crossing.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Animal_Crossing_Documentary</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''I am '''Young at Heart'''; a concept I have kept within myself since childhood.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-27-chris-wants-everyone-to-be-a-manchild-like-him.33726/]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote>''We, the '''Young at heart''' stand alongside our Liked and Cared others.''<ref>[[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/twitter-8-27-chris-wants-everyone-to-be-a-manchild-like-him.33726/]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Chris more often than not advertises his childish nature as him being "young at heart", as if this was a more positive quality of himself, even going as far as using this as a reason for girls to fall in love with him in his attraction signs <ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Attraction_Sign</ref>. This is because Chris can't tell the difference between being a child at heart, and being childish. In his mind, people who are considered "childish" actually lead a happier and more exciting life, since he believes that childlike people are more willing to show off their [[kindness]] and are generally more eccentric. In reality, adults who are "young at heart" generally have a somewhat innocent outlook of life and are generally interested in things considered suitable for children, yet understand their responsibilities as adults, something which Chris has failed to do since graduating [[High School]].
</blockquote>
|}
{| class="collapsible" style="width:100%; text-align: left;"
! style="background-color:#ffffff;" |

== Z ==
|-
|

;zap to the extreme
[[Image:ZapToTheExtreme.png|thumb|200px]]
<blockquote>1. ''(phrase)'' Go out and be brave.

<blockquote>''Go! Sonichu! Go out and '''zap to the extreme'''!''<ref>[[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]]</ref></blockquote>

<blockquote> ''Now everyone stay green and go out and '''zap to the extr-r-r-r-r-eme'''. Have a lovely day.''<ref>[[A New, Fun Trick]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: This phrase is first used on the cover of [[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]], where Chris's self-insert tells Sonichu to "zap to the extreme" as if Chris and Sonichu were in a bona fide [[Pokémon]] tournament. Chris would then end up using this phrase time and again, usually completely out of context of its original meaning.
</blockquote>

;zapbud
<blockquote>1. ''(noun)'' A fictitious flower found in the ''Sonichu'' canon; Rosechu's favorite flower.

<blockquote>''Oh, Rosechu, you are as beautiful as a rose, though a '''Zapbud''' is the flower that heals your woes.''<ref>https://sonichu.com/cwcki/Sonichu%27s_Ode_to_Rosechu</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Essentially the result of Chris attempting to create a mythology around his ''Sonichu'' comics, Chris created some of his own flora as well. Because of how "zapping" was a very common theme in the earlier issues of ''Sonichu'', Chris thought about naming his flora after this one theme. The term has ironically become popular with trolls and enablers, where they name made-up characters and places after it.</blockquote>

<blockquote>2. ''(noun)'' a [[CWC-isms#S|sweetheart]].

<blockquote>''Yes, my blossoming '''zapbud'''. That's why we are here.''<ref>[[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: In this context, the term is used the same way a female lover may be compared to a flower. This was clearly an attempt to make the flora have a greater significance by making it sound like something beautiful.
</blockquote>

;zombie-like

<blockquote>1. ''(adjective)'' To be riddled with dementia.

<blockquote>''Also, Barb is literally a Zombie-Like Living Body with little remaining of Barbara (her Soul) within her anymore; that living body is Running on Fumes at this point. She CAN NOT Drive anymore, regardless of Van loss; she has the fridgid mental activity and physical ability like a scared deer in headlights nearly ALL the time since even before June, 2021.<ref>[[Jail Letter - 29 July 2022]]</ref></blockquote>

Origin: Used in a [[Jail Letter - 29 July 2022|Jail Letter]] where Chris seems to imply that during his affair with his mother, she might have been declining mentally.
</blockquote>

|}

==References==

<references/>

==Navigation==

{{CWC-isms}}
{{Lists}}
[[Category:CWC-isms]]

Chris's resume

2025-05-24T23:21:56Z

Anemichu:

On 9 [[September 2009]], '''Chris's résumé''' finally surfaced onto the Internet, through the effort of a troll with a friend who worked in an HR department.

== Analysis ==

As is to be expected for someone with [[Slow-in-the-minds|no discernible skills]] and extremely limited work experience, the résumé is less than impressive. No fewer than three times, Chris pads his résumé by claiming his "volunteer work" for Pokémon league events at [[The GAMe PLACe]] and other locations as actual work experience (when in reality he had no authority, and in fact was himself closely monitored by the actual employees).

Chris's résumé includes a few points where he talks about his [[Chris and the industry|desire to work for a comics publisher]], such as DC or Archie. However, it's unlikely that Chris has sent any work or a résumé to either company, likely simply uploading it to Monster and waiting for others to contact him (not unlike his [[Attraction Sign]]). He is seemingly unaware or unwilling to accept that the industry standard for a professional graphic designer (working for DC or Archie) is not only a well-organized portfolio demonstrating samples of his work but also a bachelor's degree in Graphic Design and demonstrated proficiency in accepted design software such as the Adobe Creative Suite. Non-art work experience is rarely considered unless it is mentioned as an essential part of the job description.

His cover letter can be described as a Sonichu-driven ego rub. Even at a quick glance, one can see that three entire paragraphs are dedicated towards describing Sonichu and Rosechu and how they've made him "internet famous," instead of what it should be about ''(reasons why it would be a good idea to hire him.)'' In typical Chris-Chan fashion, he seems to think that he's in complete control of what ''(Sonichu-related)'' responsibilities he should be given in the organization, and makes a serious no-no by mentioning that the job should have "good pay," which is usually a turn-off to serious employers.

His "quick construction skills from scratch" (especially considering that he's referring to constructing decks in a children's card game) would mean nothing in interviewing for the very job he seeks to obtain. Indeed it would be of no interest to any potential employer, for that matter. Furthermore, according to two people who actually had a chance to play card games with Chris, his deck construction skills [[Mimms and Lucas Q&A#Follow-up|are severely lacking]].

The resume also has a number of [[CWCism|CWC-style butcheries of well known idioms]], such as the particularly grating phrase "Elbow-greased strength," which only serve to make it more nonsensical.

Furthermore, while the field for "job objectives" offers three lines for a succinct answer, Chris, typical of his [[CWCipedia|rambling style]], attaches three extra ''pages'' of useless junk, thus ensuring that any potential employer will not make any efforts to read the entire résumé.

Also included is a hand-written "Resume Writing Worksheet," a presumably earlier draft with slightly different wording and a greater emphasis on the dang, dirty trolls. As is the nature of resumes, this material is rather repetitive.

= Chris's cover letter =
8/16/2009

Dear Hiring Manager:

I, Christian Weston Chandler, Birth name: Christopher, born on February 24, 1982 in [[Charlottesville]], Virginia, am an artist with vast experiences in multiple art classes with multiple media throughout my whole lifetime from [[Chris's education#Greene County Primary School|Green County Primary School]] to [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|Piedmont Virginia Community Collge]], with a diploma from [[Manchester High School]] and a degree and certificate in Computer Aided Drafting and Design ([[CADD]]) from PVCC.

Since the inspiration and conception of Sonichu, the Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon on March 17, 2000, I have grown further in his stories, plots and adventures in a series of hand-drawn and computer-edited comic books. I also have had and passed two HTML classes, and created from notepad scratch, [[CWC's PokeSite 2!]], [[CWC's Pokésite 2#Now in Spanish|El PokeSite de R.W.C.]] (Ricardo Weston Chandler was my [[Spanish]] nickname given to me during my two years of Spanish in Manchester High), and most importantly, the First and Original website dedicated to Sonichu, Rosechu and their adventures, [[CWC's Sonichu Site]].

I was also noted twice later in the periodicals of Nintendo Power magazine and PVCC's The Forum for being the original creator of Sonichu and all. (See Periodical References below).

With the Sonichu Stie originally located at <nowiki>http://sonichuchandler.tripod.com/cwcson.htm</nowiki>, it stayed online from about 2000 until early 2009, whereas my Sonichu and Rosechu fanbase has grown massively over the years; there were also internet bullies and trolls. And the trolls hacked into and compromised my original Tripod webhosting account. I've had to pull the plug on the Tripod account and move on to another webhosting site. The second webhosting account suffered the same fate as the first, and then I moved to GoDaddy. It got hacked too, and so I pulled the plug on all my websites late May, 2009. I stayed off for about two months, then a gal-pal of mine about that time set up for me a start of what is now the New Original CWC's Sonichu and Rosechu Site; the wikipedia-styled [[Cwcipedia]] at <nowiki>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Main_Page</nowiki>. As I have done on the previous site, I have re-uploaded my Sonichu comic pages, and I am steadily expanding further with more stories and character bio pages.

I would like to be paper-published with a comic book company like Archie, Marvel, DC or Dark Horse comics, complete with Official Sonichu and Rosechu Merchandise I can personally sign-off on to follow for my Worldwide Fanbase.

Accept no imposturous substitutes who claim to be me or have any rights on my Sonichu and Rosechu stuff; I stand strong with my continued use of the Copyright © symbol on each of all my books and original singular art pieces and the date of creation of March 17, 2000. I have eye-witnesses at Manchester High of Sonichu's conception and creation on that date. It also bothers me that the trolls are even selling bootleg copies of my Life DVD, [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|Christian Weston Chandler. Yep...I'm On T.V.]], which was originally intent solely for family and close friend distribution. Trust one of the trolls to snag a copy and rip the vieos from the six-hour DVD-R.

I became famous without having to leave my house or go out-of-state or city.

After recent realization, on about July 17, 2009, of what I want to do, I wish to make it all official; get me paper-published with a comic book company like Archie, Marvel, DC or Dark Horse comics, with continuing work as a comic book artist and story creator/editor, good pay, eventual official Sonichu and Rosechu merchandise that I can personally and officially sign-off on and further enforce my nine-year-old copyright with a more peaceful future.

I feel that my Sonichu and Rosechu and self adventure stories would be an asset for the Comic Book, and all associated, industries.

Thank you for your time and consideration. I hope to have the opportunity to discuss the opening with you in person.

Sincerely

Christian Weston Chandler

Periodical References

''Nintendo Power'', Volume 179, May, 2004, Page 89: "Sonichu's Cwcville Documentary"

''Piedmont Virginia Community College's The Forum'', Volume 1, No. 13, April 26, 2004: "Meet Sonichu: Student Featured in Nintendo Power," By Kari Mitchell, The Forum Assistant Editor.

= The résumé =

The following is Chris's complete résumé, as it was posted on the popular résumé website [[Wikipedia:Monster.com|Monster.com]], with only minor edits for wiki styling.

==Contact Info==

"[[Christopher's name change|Christopher]]" [[Christian Weston Chandler]] 
[[14 Branchland Court|14 Branchland Ct.]], [[Ruckersville, VA]] 22968-9545 
Home: 434-990-0198
Cell: 434-760-0848 
[[CWCipedia|Cwcipedia]]/CWC’s Sonichu and Rosechu Site! 
<nowiki>[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Main_Page http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Main_Page]</nowiki>

==Objectives==

I wish to make my [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] franchise Official, with getting me paper published at [[Wikipedia:Archie Comics|Archie]], [[Wikipedia:Marvel Comics|Marvel]], [[Wikipedia:DC Comics|DC]] or [[Wikipedia:Dark Horse Comics|Dark Horse Comics]], with continuing work as Comic Book Artist and Story Creator/Editor, good pay, eventual Official Sonichu and Rosechu Merchandise that I, personally, can officially sign-off on and further enforce my nine-year-old copyright with a more peaceful future. (See attached pages for more info).

==Experience==
''[Note: for some reason, Chris listed each experience with an "Experience" heading. It is unknown why Chris did this, but for the sake of clarity, all job experience is collated into one heading.]''

Date of Employment: March 17, [[2000]] – Current 
(Self) C.W.C. Comics 
Ruckersville, VA 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: Drawing, writing, coloring and story-telling the continuing adventures of Sonichu, Rosechu and myself from life, creating from scratch and setting up the first original Sonichu Site, [[CWC’s Sonichu Site]], as well as its sibling sites.
* Functional Skills: [[Chris and art|Great hand-drawing skills]], [[Chris and writing|story-telling and editing]], building design from Computer Aided Drafting and Design ([[CADD]]), quick touch-typing skills, [[Getting Foam Ed|great Photoshop experiences]], good HTML skills.
* Transferable Skills: All of the above.

Date of Employment: June, [[2003]] – September, 2003 
[[Cutco]] Cutlery 
[[Charlottesville, VA]] 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: Salesman of their fine [[Pocket knife|cutlery]] with the patented double-d edges.
* Functional Skills: Good people/social skills, great memorization of the salesman routine (won my boss over greatly with that memorizing).
* Transferable Skills: Good people/social skills, memorizing and swift learning.

Date of Employment: August, [[2001]] – [[Lies|October, 2001]]<ref>In the [[Father Call]], Chris tells Kacey's Father that on September 11th he was shopping with his mother because he had ''just'' been fired from Wendy's.</ref> 
[[Wendy's|Wendys]]''[sic]'' Restaurant 
Ruckersville, VA 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: Cleaning trays, tables and carpet/tile flooring, keeping the place neat and serving the customers with kind, understanding help.
* Functional Skills: Elbow-greased strength, good people/social skills.
* Transferable Skills: All of the above.

Date of Employment: March, [[1998]] ''[sic]''<ref>The Pokémon trading card game wasn't released in North America until December 1998, and its official league wasn't founded until the following year.</ref> – June, [[2000]] 
[[Wikipedia:Books-a-Million|Books-a-Million]] 
[[Wikipedia:Midlothian,_VA|Midlothian, VA]] 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: I volunteered to help out as the Gym Leader’s Assistant for the Pokémon Trading Card Game league. I have taught many children how to play the game with care and respect, constructed their 60-card decks from their scattered collection with sound thought and speed skimming skills. I also [[Pedofork|watched over the children]] as I have played with them in the Pokémon Trading Card Game.
* Functional Skills: Elbow-greased strength, good people/social skills, quick construction skills from scratch, speed thinking.
* Transferable Skills: All of the above.

Date of Employment: June, 2000 – June, [[2002]] 
Toys “R” Us 
Charlottesville, VA 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: I volunteered to help out as the Gym Leader’s Assistant for the Pokémon Trading Card Game league. I have taught many children how to play the game with care and respect, constructed their 60-card decks from their scattered collection with sound thought and speed skimming skills. I also watched over the children as I have played with them in the Pokémon Trading Card Game.
* Functional Skills: Elbow-greased strength, good people/social skills, quick construction skills from scratch, speed thinking.
* Transferable Skills: All of the above.

Date of Employment: June, 2002 – June, [[2007]] 
[[The GAMe PLACe|The (Game & Hobby) Place]] 
Charlottesville, VA 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: I volunteered to help out as the Gym Leader’s Assistant for the Pokémon Trading Card Game league. I have taught many children how to play the game with care and respect, constructed their 60-card decks from their scattered collection with sound thought and speed skimming skills. I also watched over the children as I have played with them in the Pokémon Trading Card Game.
* Functional Skills: Elbow-greased strength, good people/social skills, quick construction skills from scratch, speed thinking.
* Transferable Skills: All of the above.

==School Experience==

===Professional Education===

Dates of Attendance: 9/1/1996 to 6/15/2000
[[Manchester High School]]
Chesterfield County, Virginia

* High School Diploma with [[Honor Roll]] Grades.
* Honor Roll Star Pin awarded at Graduation.
* Certificate for serving on the varsity basketball team during my freshman year.

===Academic Education===

Dates of Attendance: August, 2000 to 6/1/2006
[[Piedmont Virginia Community College]]
Charlottesville, Virginia

* Made the Dean’s List with Honor Roll Grades
* Computer Aided Drafting and Design, CADD, Associates Degree
* Computer Aided Drafting and Design, CADD, Career Studies Certificate

==References==

Susan Hannifan

* PVCC Guidance Counsoler
* 501 College Dr. Charlottesville, VA 22902
* 434-961-5281
* shannifan@pvcc.edu

Reverend Elizabeth Foss

* Pastor of [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church]]
* 1901 Thomson Rd. Charlottesville, VA 22903
* 434-296-6976
* elizabethfoss22@earthlink.net

[[Rocky|Rocky Shoemaker]]

* Pastoral Counsoler
* 1901 Thomson Rd. Charlottesville, VA 22903
* 434-966-9636
* revrocky48@gmail.com

Tony Wayne

* Physics Teacher at Albemarle High School/Volunteer Pokémon TCG League Gym Leader
* 2275 Hydraulic Rd. Charlottesville, VA 22901
* 434-975-9300 Ext. 60265
* vastphysics@comcast.net

==Job Objective, Full Story==

I, [[Christian Weston Chandler]], Birth name: [[Christopher]], born on February 24, [[1982]] in [[Charlottesville]], [[Virginia]], am an artist with vast experiences in multiple art classes with multiple media throughout my whole lifetime from Green County Primary School to [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|Piedmont Virginia Community Collge]], with a diploma from [[Manchester High School]] and a degree and certificate in [[Computer Aided Drafting and Design]] (CADD) from PVCC.

Since the inspiration and conception of [[Sonichu]], the [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|Electric-Hedgehog Pokémon]] on March 17, [[2000]], I have grown further in his stories, plots and adventures in a series of hand-drawn and computer-edited comic books. I also have had and passed two HTML classes, and created from notepad scratch, [[CWC's Pokésite 2|CWC’s PokéSite 2!, El PokéSite de R.W.C.]] ([[Ricardo]] Weston Chandler was my Spanish nickname given to me during my two years of Spanish in Manchester High), and most importantly, the First and Original website dedicated to Sonichu, Rosechu and their adventures, [[CWC's Sonichu Site!|CWC’s Sonichu Site]].

I was also noted twice later in the periodicals of [[Nintendo Power]] magazine and PVCC’s The Forum for being the original creator of Sonichu and all. (See Periodical References below)

With the Sonichu [[Chris and English#Spelling|Stie]] originally located at <nowiki>http://sonichuchandler.tripod.com/cwcson.htm</nowiki>, it stayed online from about [[2000]] until early [[2009]], whereas my Sonichu and Rosechu fanbase has grown massively over the years; there were also internet bullies and [[trolls]]. And the trolls hacked into and compromised my original Tripod webhosting account. I’ve had to pull the plug on the Tripod account and move on to another webhosting site. The second webhosting account suffered the same fate as the first, and then I moved to GoDaddy. It got hacked too, and so I pulled the plug on all my websites late May, 2009. I stayed off for about two months, then a gal-pal of mine about that time set up for me a start of what is now the New Original CWC’s Sonichu and Rosechu Site; the wikipedia-styled [[Cwcipedia]] at <nowiki>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Main_Page</nowiki>. As I have done on the previous site, I have re-uploaded my Sonichu comic pages, and I am steadily expanding further with more stories and character bio pages.

I would like to be paper-published with a comic book company like Archie, Marvel, DC or Dark Horse comics, complete with Official Sonichu and Rosechu Merchandise I can personally sign-off on to follow for my Worldwide [[Fanbase]].

Accept no imposturous substitutes who claim to be me or have any rights on my Sonichu and Rosechu stuff; I stand strong with my continued use of the Copyright © symbol on each of all my books and original singular art pieces and the date of creation of March 17, 2000. I have eye-witnesses at Manchester High of Sonichu’s conception and creation on that date. It also bothers me that the trolls are even selling bootleg copies of my Life DVD, [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|Christian Weston Chandler. Yep…I’m On T.V.]], which was originally intent solely for family and close friend distribution. Trust one of the trolls to snag a copy and rip the vieos from the six-hour DVD-R.

I became famous without having to leave my house or go out-of-state or city.

After recent realization, on about July 17, [[2009]], of what I want to do, I wish to make it all official; get me paper-published with a comic book company like [[Wikipedia:Archie Comics|Archie]], [[Wikipedia:Marvel Comics|Marvel]], [[Wikipedia:DC Comics|DC]] or [[Wikipedia:Dark Horse Comics|Dark Horse comics]], with continuing work as a comic book artist and story creator/editor, good pay, eventual official Sonichu and Rosechu merchandise that I can personally and officially sign-off on and further enforce my nine-year-old copyright with a more peaceful future.

“Christopher” Christian Weston Chandler, August 11, 2009

© March 17, 2000 by “Christopher” Christian Weston Chandler.

==Periodical References==

* ''Nintendo Power'' – Volume 179, May 2004, Page 89 – [[Nintendo Power Magazine#The Documentary|Sonichu’s Cwcville Documentary]]
* Piedmont Virginia Community College’s ''The Forum'' – Volume 1, No. 13, 26 April 2004 – Meet Sonichu – Student Featured in Nintendo Power – By Kari Mitchell, The Forum Assistant Editor.

==Additional Information==
'''Career Highlights:''' Near-Daily updates on my Cwcipedia website, and my continued Comic Book Page drawing, coloring, writing and editing. Great hand-drawing skills, story-telling and editing, building design from Computer Aided Drafting and Design (CADD), quick touch-typing skills, great Photoshop experiences, good HTML skills. Good people/social skills, memorizing and swift learning. Elbow-Greased Strength.

'''Skills:'''

* Great hand-drawing skills (3/3)

* Story-Telling and Editing (3/3)

* Building design from Computer Aided Drafting and Design (3/3)

* Quick Touch Typing (3/3)

* Great Photoshop experiences (3/3)

* Good HTML skills (2/3)

* Good people/social skills (3/3)

* Memorizing and Swift Learning (3/3)

* Elbow-Greased Strength (3/3)

'''Professional Memberships:''' [blank]

'''Interests & Hobbies:''' Drawing, building, videogames, music, movies or TV shows, self-reflecting in peaceful situations.

'''Have you served in the military?''' [[Bob|Other Military Family Member]]

'''Do you have security clearance?''' None

'''Are you willing to relocate?''' Yes

'''Are you willing to travel?''' Up to 25% travel

'''Where are you authorized to work?''' US

'''Ethnicity:''' White (Not of Hispanic Origin)

'''Gender:''' Male

== Career Goals ==

'''What job titles are you looking for?'''

Paper-Published comic book author/artist/editor

'''What are your must-haves in your career (e.g., bring pets to work, free coffee)?'''

Good Pay

'''Where would you like to work?'''

[blank]

'''What skills do you want to develop?'''

Better my Hand-Drawing, writing and editing from after 9 years of practice.

'''What salary range are you looking for?'''

[blank]

'''Which companies would you like to work for?'''

Archie Comics, Marvel Comics, DC Comics or Dark Horse Comics

'''What industries would you like to work in?'''

Printing and Publishing

'''What size company would you like to work for?'''

[blank]

'''Which type of company would you like to work for?'''

Public, Private

'''What career level would you like to reach?'''

Experienced (Non-Manager)

==Chris's Resume Writing Worksheet==

===Contact Information===
'''Name:''' "Christopher" Christian Weston Chandler

'''Address:''' 14 Branchland Ct.

Ruckersville, VA 22968-9545

'''Telephone:''' Home: (434)-990-0198 Cell: (434)-760-0848

'''E-mail:''' ChrisChanSonichu@aol.com

===Job Objective===
I am an Artist with Vast Experiences in Multiple Art Classes in my lifetime; with a Degree and Certificate in Computer Aided Drafting & Design from Piedmont Virginia Community...(see attached sheets)

===Work Experience (Tip: List most recent first)===
'''Employer Name:''' Wendys

'''City, State:''' Ruckersville, VA

'''Job Title:''' Basic Employee

'''Start date-End date:''' August, 2001 - October, 2001

'''Your primary duties were:''' Cleaning Trays, Cleaning Tables, Vaccuming & Cleaning the Carpet/Tile Flooring, being kind and serving to the customers, and taking garbage to dumpster.

'''List Functional Skills:''' Elbow Greasing Cleaning, Kind, Polite, People Social Skills.

'''List Transferable Skills:''' Kind, Polite People Social Skills.

'''Employer Name:''' Cutco Cutlary

'''City, State:''' Charlottesville, VA

'''Job Title:''' <s>Sales Rep/</s>Salesman

'''Start date-End date:''' June, 2003 - September, 2003

'''Your primary duties were:''' Salesman of their fine cutlary with their patented Double-D Edges.

'''List Functional Skills:''' <s>Pep</s> People/Social Skills, Good Memorizing of the Salesman Routine; won my Boss OVER GREATLY with that Memorizing

'''List Transferable Skills:''' People/Social Skills, Memorizing + Learning

'''Employer Name:''' Self

'''City, State:''' Ruckersville, VA

'''Job Title:''' Artist, HTML Wiz

'''Start date - End date:''' March 17, 2000 - ????

'''Your primary duties were:''' Drawing, <s>an</s> writing and story-telling the continuing adventures of Sonichu, Rosechu, and myself from LIFE.

'''List Functional Skills:''' Great Hand-Drawing Skills, Story-Creating, Building Designing (Designed CWCville Shopping Mall w. Mayor's Office in CADD), Quick Touch-Typing Skills, Photoshop Experiences

'''List Transferable Skills:''' ALL OF THE ABOVE.

===Education (List most recent first)===
'''Name of School or Institution:''' Manchester High School

'''City, State:''' Chesterfield Co., VA

'''Type of Training or Certification:''' Diploma

'''Start date - End date:''' Sept., 1996 - June, 2000

'''Name of School or Institution:''' Piedmont Virginia Community College

'''City, State:''' Charlottesville, VA

'''Type of Training or Certification:''' Computer Aided Drafting & Design Degree + Certificate

'''Start date - End date:''' August, 2000 - June, 2006

===References (Tip: avoid using family members)===
'''Name:''' Susan Hannifan

'''Relationship:''' PVCC Guidance Counsoler

'''Address:''' 501 College Dr.

'''Telephone number:''' (434)-961-5281

'''Name:''' Rocky Shoemaker

'''Relationship:''' Pastoral Counsoler

'''Address:''' Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church

'''Telephone number:''' (434)-996-9636

'''Name:''' Elizabeth Foss

'''Relationship:''' Pastor

'''Address:''' [blank]

'''Telephone number:''' (434)-296-6976

===Resume Writing Worksheet Job Objective===
"Christopher" Christian Weston Chandler.

I am an Artist with vast experiences in Multiple Art Classes my whole lifetime from Greene County Primary to Piedmont Virginia Community College with multiple Media experiences, with a Manchester High School Diploma and PVCC Degree + Certificate in Computer Aided Drafting & Design (CADD). Since March 17, 2000, I have started inspiration with my Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon creations, ''Sonichu & Rosechu'', and grew further in their life's Stories and Plots in a series of Hand-Drawn and Computer-Edited Comic Books. I also have had and passed Two HTML classes, and created from Notepad Scratch CWC's PokeSite 2, El PokeSite De R.W.C. (Ricardo Weston Chandler; my Spanish Nickname from my taking of Two Years of Spanish at Manchester High), and more importantly, THE Original and First Sonichu Site, CWC's Sonichu Site @ <nowiki>http://sonichuchandler.tripod.com/cwcson.htm</nowiki>. Sadly, after years had passed, in early 2009, my webhosting account was compromised by Hackers + Internet Trolls/Bullies. I've had to go from webhost to webhost Twice to keep my Original Sites Up. Sadly, the Trolls got into them as well. I had pulled the plug and keep my sites offline for Two Months. <s>And recently</s> from Late May, 2009 at GoDaddy.com. And Now, a close real-life friend of mine put together for me the start of what is NOW My Official Sonichu Site, A.K.A., Cwcipedia. As with my past on CWC's Sonichu Site, I have reuploaded my Sonichu Comic Pages and started further expanding in Stories + Bio Pages.

I would like to be Paper-Published with a Comic Book Company like Archie<s>s</s>, Marvel, DC or Darkhorse, complete with Official Merchandise to follow for my Worldwide Fanbase.

Unfortunately, I have heard of impostors trying to claim my Sonichu & Rosechu Franchise (is a good word I think), but I Stand Strong with my continued Legal Use of the copyright © symbol, and the Date of March 17, 2000. I have eye-witnesses at M.H.S. of Sonichu's conception and creation on That Day. And even worse, making money selling Fake Merchandise and Bootleg copies of my Life to 25-YEAR-OLD D.V.D, "Christian Weston Chandler...Yep...I'm on T.V.," which was Originally distributed solely to Family and Close Friends. Trust the Trolls to pose as my Primary School Girlfriend Crush and con a copy out of me late 2008.

I became famous, and I never had to leave my house or go out-of-state or city.

Anyway, I want to MAKE IT ALL OFFICIAL, get me Paper-Published with continuing work, a good, reasonable amount of money, <s>and mak</s> further Enforce my Nine-YEAR-OLD Copyright, and make my future more peaceful. Also, to put those Dang, Dirty Trolls to Rest and At Bay.

Christopher Christian Weston Chandler

August 11, 2009.

===Resume Writing Worksheet Gallery===
<center><gallery>
Image:scan.jpg|The concept of "Most recent" escapes Chris.
Image:scan0001.jpg|Notice how he can't keep himself from including Sonichu in EVERYTHING.
Image:scan0002.jpg|His only references are a guidance counselor that he had almost a decade ago and two pastors at his church.
Image:scan0003.jpg|Largely the same as the other pages except he whines about his websites getting hacked.
Image:scan0004.jpg|Even his shitty DVD is worth mentioning apparently.
Image:scan0005.jpg|He wants to put the dang, dirty trolls to rest.
</gallery></center>

==See Also==

*[[Chris and work]]

==References==
<references/>

{{The Internet}}

[[Category:Historical Documents]]

Chris's resume

2025-05-24T23:19:53Z

Anemichu: /* Analysis */

On 9 [[September 2009]], '''Chris's résumé''' finally surfaced onto the Internet, through the effort of a troll with a friend who worked in an HR department.

== Analysis ==

As is to be expected for someone with [[Slow-in-the-minds|no discernible skills]] and extremely limited work experience, the résumé is less than impressive. No fewer than three times, Chris pads his résumé by claiming his "volunteer work" for Pokémon league events at [[The GAMe PLACe]] and other locations as actual work experience (when in reality he had no authority, and in fact was himself closely monitored by the actual employees).

Chris's résumé includes a few points where he talks about his [[Chris and the industry|desire to work for a comics publisher]], such as DC or Archie. However, it's unlikely that Chris has sent any work or a résumé to either company, likely simply uploading it to Monster and waiting for others to contact him (not unlike his [[Attraction Sign]]). He is seemingly unaware or unwilling to accept that the industry standard for a professional graphic designer (working for DC or Archie) is not only a well-organized portfolio demonstrating samples of his work but also a bachelor's degree in Graphic Design and demonstrated proficiency in accepted design software such as the Adobe Creative Suite. Non-art work experience is rarely considered unless it is mentioned as an essential part of the job description.

His cover letter can be described as a Sonichu-driven ego rub. Even at a quick glance, one can see that three entire paragraphs are dedicated towards describing Sonichu and Rosechu and how they've made him "internet famous," instead of what it should be about ''(reasons why it would be a good idea to hire him.)'' In typical Chris-Chan fashion, he seems to think that he's in complete control of what ''(Sonichu-related)'' responsibilities he should be given in the organization, and makes a serious no-no by mentioning that the job should have "good pay", which is usually a turn-off to serious employers.

His "quick construction skills from scratch" (especially considering that he's referring to constructing decks in a children's card game) would mean nothing in interviewing for the very job he seeks to obtain. Indeed it would be of no interest to any potential employer, for that matter. Furthermore, according to two people who actually had a chance to play card games with Chris, his deck construction skills [[Mimms and Lucas Q&A#Follow-up|are severely lacking]].

The resume also has a number of [[CWCism|CWC-style butcheries of well known idioms]], such as the particularly grating phrase "Elbow-greased strength", which only serve to make it more nonsensical.

Furthermore, while the field for "job objectives" offers three lines for a succinct answer, Chris, typical of his [[CWCipedia|rambling style]], attaches three extra ''pages'' of useless junk, thus ensuring that any potential employer will not make any efforts to read the entire résumé.

Also included is a hand-written "Resume Writing Worksheet," a presumably earlier draft with slightly different wording and a greater emphasis on the dang, dirty trolls. As is the nature of resumes, this material is rather repetitive.

= Chris's cover letter =
8/16/2009

Dear Hiring Manager:

I, Christian Weston Chandler, Birth name: Christopher, born on February 24, 1982 in [[Charlottesville]], Virginia, am an artist with vast experiences in multiple art classes with multiple media throughout my whole lifetime from [[Chris's education#Greene County Primary School|Green County Primary School]] to [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|Piedmont Virginia Community Collge]], with a diploma from [[Manchester High School]] and a degree and certificate in Computer Aided Drafting and Design ([[CADD]]) from PVCC.

Since the inspiration and conception of Sonichu, the Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon on March 17, 2000, I have grown further in his stories, plots and adventures in a series of hand-drawn and computer-edited comic books. I also have had and passed two HTML classes, and created from notepad scratch, [[CWC's PokeSite 2!]], [[CWC's Pokésite 2#Now in Spanish|El PokeSite de R.W.C.]] (Ricardo Weston Chandler was my [[Spanish]] nickname given to me during my two years of Spanish in Manchester High), and most importantly, the First and Original website dedicated to Sonichu, Rosechu and their adventures, [[CWC's Sonichu Site]].

I was also noted twice later in the periodicals of Nintendo Power magazine and PVCC's The Forum for being the original creator of Sonichu and all. (See Periodical References below).

With the Sonichu Stie originally located at <nowiki>http://sonichuchandler.tripod.com/cwcson.htm</nowiki>, it stayed online from about 2000 until early 2009, whereas my Sonichu and Rosechu fanbase has grown massively over the years; there were also internet bullies and trolls. And the trolls hacked into and compromised my original Tripod webhosting account. I've had to pull the plug on the Tripod account and move on to another webhosting site. The second webhosting account suffered the same fate as the first, and then I moved to GoDaddy. It got hacked too, and so I pulled the plug on all my websites late May, 2009. I stayed off for about two months, then a gal-pal of mine about that time set up for me a start of what is now the New Original CWC's Sonichu and Rosechu Site; the wikipedia-styled [[Cwcipedia]] at <nowiki>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Main_Page</nowiki>. As I have done on the previous site, I have re-uploaded my Sonichu comic pages, and I am steadily expanding further with more stories and character bio pages.

I would like to be paper-published with a comic book company like Archie, Marvel, DC or Dark Horse comics, complete with Official Sonichu and Rosechu Merchandise I can personally sign-off on to follow for my Worldwide Fanbase.

Accept no imposturous substitutes who claim to be me or have any rights on my Sonichu and Rosechu stuff; I stand strong with my continued use of the Copyright © symbol on each of all my books and original singular art pieces and the date of creation of March 17, 2000. I have eye-witnesses at Manchester High of Sonichu's conception and creation on that date. It also bothers me that the trolls are even selling bootleg copies of my Life DVD, [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|Christian Weston Chandler. Yep...I'm On T.V.]], which was originally intent solely for family and close friend distribution. Trust one of the trolls to snag a copy and rip the vieos from the six-hour DVD-R.

I became famous without having to leave my house or go out-of-state or city.

After recent realization, on about July 17, 2009, of what I want to do, I wish to make it all official; get me paper-published with a comic book company like Archie, Marvel, DC or Dark Horse comics, with continuing work as a comic book artist and story creator/editor, good pay, eventual official Sonichu and Rosechu merchandise that I can personally and officially sign-off on and further enforce my nine-year-old copyright with a more peaceful future.

I feel that my Sonichu and Rosechu and self adventure stories would be an asset for the Comic Book, and all associated, industries.

Thank you for your time and consideration. I hope to have the opportunity to discuss the opening with you in person.

Sincerely

Christian Weston Chandler

Periodical References

''Nintendo Power'', Volume 179, May, 2004, Page 89: "Sonichu's Cwcville Documentary"

''Piedmont Virginia Community College's The Forum'', Volume 1, No. 13, April 26, 2004: "Meet Sonichu: Student Featured in Nintendo Power," By Kari Mitchell, The Forum Assistant Editor.

= The résumé =

The following is Chris's complete résumé, as it was posted on the popular résumé website [[Wikipedia:Monster.com|Monster.com]], with only minor edits for wiki styling.

==Contact Info==

"[[Christopher's name change|Christopher]]" [[Christian Weston Chandler]] 
[[14 Branchland Court|14 Branchland Ct.]], [[Ruckersville, VA]] 22968-9545 
Home: 434-990-0198
Cell: 434-760-0848 
[[CWCipedia|Cwcipedia]]/CWC’s Sonichu and Rosechu Site! 
<nowiki>[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Main_Page http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Main_Page]</nowiki>

==Objectives==

I wish to make my [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] franchise Official, with getting me paper published at [[Wikipedia:Archie Comics|Archie]], [[Wikipedia:Marvel Comics|Marvel]], [[Wikipedia:DC Comics|DC]] or [[Wikipedia:Dark Horse Comics|Dark Horse Comics]], with continuing work as Comic Book Artist and Story Creator/Editor, good pay, eventual Official Sonichu and Rosechu Merchandise that I, personally, can officially sign-off on and further enforce my nine-year-old copyright with a more peaceful future. (See attached pages for more info).

==Experience==
''[Note: for some reason, Chris listed each experience with an "Experience" heading. It is unknown why Chris did this, but for the sake of clarity, all job experience is collated into one heading.]''

Date of Employment: March 17, [[2000]] – Current 
(Self) C.W.C. Comics 
Ruckersville, VA 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: Drawing, writing, coloring and story-telling the continuing adventures of Sonichu, Rosechu and myself from life, creating from scratch and setting up the first original Sonichu Site, [[CWC’s Sonichu Site]], as well as its sibling sites.
* Functional Skills: [[Chris and art|Great hand-drawing skills]], [[Chris and writing|story-telling and editing]], building design from Computer Aided Drafting and Design ([[CADD]]), quick touch-typing skills, [[Getting Foam Ed|great Photoshop experiences]], good HTML skills.
* Transferable Skills: All of the above.

Date of Employment: June, [[2003]] – September, 2003 
[[Cutco]] Cutlery 
[[Charlottesville, VA]] 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: Salesman of their fine [[Pocket knife|cutlery]] with the patented double-d edges.
* Functional Skills: Good people/social skills, great memorization of the salesman routine (won my boss over greatly with that memorizing).
* Transferable Skills: Good people/social skills, memorizing and swift learning.

Date of Employment: August, [[2001]] – [[Lies|October, 2001]]<ref>In the [[Father Call]], Chris tells Kacey's Father that on September 11th he was shopping with his mother because he had ''just'' been fired from Wendy's.</ref> 
[[Wendy's|Wendys]]''[sic]'' Restaurant 
Ruckersville, VA 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: Cleaning trays, tables and carpet/tile flooring, keeping the place neat and serving the customers with kind, understanding help.
* Functional Skills: Elbow-greased strength, good people/social skills.
* Transferable Skills: All of the above.

Date of Employment: March, [[1998]] ''[sic]''<ref>The Pokémon trading card game wasn't released in North America until December 1998, and its official league wasn't founded until the following year.</ref> – June, [[2000]] 
[[Wikipedia:Books-a-Million|Books-a-Million]] 
[[Wikipedia:Midlothian,_VA|Midlothian, VA]] 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: I volunteered to help out as the Gym Leader’s Assistant for the Pokémon Trading Card Game league. I have taught many children how to play the game with care and respect, constructed their 60-card decks from their scattered collection with sound thought and speed skimming skills. I also [[Pedofork|watched over the children]] as I have played with them in the Pokémon Trading Card Game.
* Functional Skills: Elbow-greased strength, good people/social skills, quick construction skills from scratch, speed thinking.
* Transferable Skills: All of the above.

Date of Employment: June, 2000 – June, [[2002]] 
Toys “R” Us 
Charlottesville, VA 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: I volunteered to help out as the Gym Leader’s Assistant for the Pokémon Trading Card Game league. I have taught many children how to play the game with care and respect, constructed their 60-card decks from their scattered collection with sound thought and speed skimming skills. I also watched over the children as I have played with them in the Pokémon Trading Card Game.
* Functional Skills: Elbow-greased strength, good people/social skills, quick construction skills from scratch, speed thinking.
* Transferable Skills: All of the above.

Date of Employment: June, 2002 – June, [[2007]] 
[[The GAMe PLACe|The (Game & Hobby) Place]] 
Charlottesville, VA 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: I volunteered to help out as the Gym Leader’s Assistant for the Pokémon Trading Card Game league. I have taught many children how to play the game with care and respect, constructed their 60-card decks from their scattered collection with sound thought and speed skimming skills. I also watched over the children as I have played with them in the Pokémon Trading Card Game.
* Functional Skills: Elbow-greased strength, good people/social skills, quick construction skills from scratch, speed thinking.
* Transferable Skills: All of the above.

==School Experience==

===Professional Education===

Dates of Attendance: 9/1/1996 to 6/15/2000
[[Manchester High School]]
Chesterfield County, Virginia

* High School Diploma with [[Honor Roll]] Grades.
* Honor Roll Star Pin awarded at Graduation.
* Certificate for serving on the varsity basketball team during my freshman year.

===Academic Education===

Dates of Attendance: August, 2000 to 6/1/2006
[[Piedmont Virginia Community College]]
Charlottesville, Virginia

* Made the Dean’s List with Honor Roll Grades
* Computer Aided Drafting and Design, CADD, Associates Degree
* Computer Aided Drafting and Design, CADD, Career Studies Certificate

==References==

Susan Hannifan

* PVCC Guidance Counsoler
* 501 College Dr. Charlottesville, VA 22902
* 434-961-5281
* shannifan@pvcc.edu

Reverend Elizabeth Foss

* Pastor of [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church]]
* 1901 Thomson Rd. Charlottesville, VA 22903
* 434-296-6976
* elizabethfoss22@earthlink.net

[[Rocky|Rocky Shoemaker]]

* Pastoral Counsoler
* 1901 Thomson Rd. Charlottesville, VA 22903
* 434-966-9636
* revrocky48@gmail.com

Tony Wayne

* Physics Teacher at Albemarle High School/Volunteer Pokémon TCG League Gym Leader
* 2275 Hydraulic Rd. Charlottesville, VA 22901
* 434-975-9300 Ext. 60265
* vastphysics@comcast.net

==Job Objective, Full Story==

I, [[Christian Weston Chandler]], Birth name: [[Christopher]], born on February 24, [[1982]] in [[Charlottesville]], [[Virginia]], am an artist with vast experiences in multiple art classes with multiple media throughout my whole lifetime from Green County Primary School to [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|Piedmont Virginia Community Collge]], with a diploma from [[Manchester High School]] and a degree and certificate in [[Computer Aided Drafting and Design]] (CADD) from PVCC.

Since the inspiration and conception of [[Sonichu]], the [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|Electric-Hedgehog Pokémon]] on March 17, [[2000]], I have grown further in his stories, plots and adventures in a series of hand-drawn and computer-edited comic books. I also have had and passed two HTML classes, and created from notepad scratch, [[CWC's Pokésite 2|CWC’s PokéSite 2!, El PokéSite de R.W.C.]] ([[Ricardo]] Weston Chandler was my Spanish nickname given to me during my two years of Spanish in Manchester High), and most importantly, the First and Original website dedicated to Sonichu, Rosechu and their adventures, [[CWC's Sonichu Site!|CWC’s Sonichu Site]].

I was also noted twice later in the periodicals of [[Nintendo Power]] magazine and PVCC’s The Forum for being the original creator of Sonichu and all. (See Periodical References below)

With the Sonichu [[Chris and English#Spelling|Stie]] originally located at <nowiki>http://sonichuchandler.tripod.com/cwcson.htm</nowiki>, it stayed online from about [[2000]] until early [[2009]], whereas my Sonichu and Rosechu fanbase has grown massively over the years; there were also internet bullies and [[trolls]]. And the trolls hacked into and compromised my original Tripod webhosting account. I’ve had to pull the plug on the Tripod account and move on to another webhosting site. The second webhosting account suffered the same fate as the first, and then I moved to GoDaddy. It got hacked too, and so I pulled the plug on all my websites late May, 2009. I stayed off for about two months, then a gal-pal of mine about that time set up for me a start of what is now the New Original CWC’s Sonichu and Rosechu Site; the wikipedia-styled [[Cwcipedia]] at <nowiki>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Main_Page</nowiki>. As I have done on the previous site, I have re-uploaded my Sonichu comic pages, and I am steadily expanding further with more stories and character bio pages.

I would like to be paper-published with a comic book company like Archie, Marvel, DC or Dark Horse comics, complete with Official Sonichu and Rosechu Merchandise I can personally sign-off on to follow for my Worldwide [[Fanbase]].

Accept no imposturous substitutes who claim to be me or have any rights on my Sonichu and Rosechu stuff; I stand strong with my continued use of the Copyright © symbol on each of all my books and original singular art pieces and the date of creation of March 17, 2000. I have eye-witnesses at Manchester High of Sonichu’s conception and creation on that date. It also bothers me that the trolls are even selling bootleg copies of my Life DVD, [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|Christian Weston Chandler. Yep…I’m On T.V.]], which was originally intent solely for family and close friend distribution. Trust one of the trolls to snag a copy and rip the vieos from the six-hour DVD-R.

I became famous without having to leave my house or go out-of-state or city.

After recent realization, on about July 17, [[2009]], of what I want to do, I wish to make it all official; get me paper-published with a comic book company like [[Wikipedia:Archie Comics|Archie]], [[Wikipedia:Marvel Comics|Marvel]], [[Wikipedia:DC Comics|DC]] or [[Wikipedia:Dark Horse Comics|Dark Horse comics]], with continuing work as a comic book artist and story creator/editor, good pay, eventual official Sonichu and Rosechu merchandise that I can personally and officially sign-off on and further enforce my nine-year-old copyright with a more peaceful future.

“Christopher” Christian Weston Chandler, August 11, 2009

© March 17, 2000 by “Christopher” Christian Weston Chandler.

==Periodical References==

* ''Nintendo Power'' – Volume 179, May 2004, Page 89 – [[Nintendo Power Magazine#The Documentary|Sonichu’s Cwcville Documentary]]
* Piedmont Virginia Community College’s ''The Forum'' – Volume 1, No. 13, 26 April 2004 – Meet Sonichu – Student Featured in Nintendo Power – By Kari Mitchell, The Forum Assistant Editor.

==Additional Information==
'''Career Highlights:''' Near-Daily updates on my Cwcipedia website, and my continued Comic Book Page drawing, coloring, writing and editing. Great hand-drawing skills, story-telling and editing, building design from Computer Aided Drafting and Design (CADD), quick touch-typing skills, great Photoshop experiences, good HTML skills. Good people/social skills, memorizing and swift learning. Elbow-Greased Strength.

'''Skills:'''

* Great hand-drawing skills (3/3)

* Story-Telling and Editing (3/3)

* Building design from Computer Aided Drafting and Design (3/3)

* Quick Touch Typing (3/3)

* Great Photoshop experiences (3/3)

* Good HTML skills (2/3)

* Good people/social skills (3/3)

* Memorizing and Swift Learning (3/3)

* Elbow-Greased Strength (3/3)

'''Professional Memberships:''' [blank]

'''Interests & Hobbies:''' Drawing, building, videogames, music, movies or TV shows, self-reflecting in peaceful situations.

'''Have you served in the military?''' [[Bob|Other Military Family Member]]

'''Do you have security clearance?''' None

'''Are you willing to relocate?''' Yes

'''Are you willing to travel?''' Up to 25% travel

'''Where are you authorized to work?''' US

'''Ethnicity:''' White (Not of Hispanic Origin)

'''Gender:''' Male

== Career Goals ==

'''What job titles are you looking for?'''

Paper-Published comic book author/artist/editor

'''What are your must-haves in your career (e.g., bring pets to work, free coffee)?'''

Good Pay

'''Where would you like to work?'''

[blank]

'''What skills do you want to develop?'''

Better my Hand-Drawing, writing and editing from after 9 years of practice.

'''What salary range are you looking for?'''

[blank]

'''Which companies would you like to work for?'''

Archie Comics, Marvel Comics, DC Comics or Dark Horse Comics

'''What industries would you like to work in?'''

Printing and Publishing

'''What size company would you like to work for?'''

[blank]

'''Which type of company would you like to work for?'''

Public, Private

'''What career level would you like to reach?'''

Experienced (Non-Manager)

==Chris's Resume Writing Worksheet==

===Contact Information===
'''Name:''' "Christopher" Christian Weston Chandler

'''Address:''' 14 Branchland Ct.

Ruckersville, VA 22968-9545

'''Telephone:''' Home: (434)-990-0198 Cell: (434)-760-0848

'''E-mail:''' ChrisChanSonichu@aol.com

===Job Objective===
I am an Artist with Vast Experiences in Multiple Art Classes in my lifetime; with a Degree and Certificate in Computer Aided Drafting & Design from Piedmont Virginia Community...(see attached sheets)

===Work Experience (Tip: List most recent first)===
'''Employer Name:''' Wendys

'''City, State:''' Ruckersville, VA

'''Job Title:''' Basic Employee

'''Start date-End date:''' August, 2001 - October, 2001

'''Your primary duties were:''' Cleaning Trays, Cleaning Tables, Vaccuming & Cleaning the Carpet/Tile Flooring, being kind and serving to the customers, and taking garbage to dumpster.

'''List Functional Skills:''' Elbow Greasing Cleaning, Kind, Polite, People Social Skills.

'''List Transferable Skills:''' Kind, Polite People Social Skills.

'''Employer Name:''' Cutco Cutlary

'''City, State:''' Charlottesville, VA

'''Job Title:''' <s>Sales Rep/</s>Salesman

'''Start date-End date:''' June, 2003 - September, 2003

'''Your primary duties were:''' Salesman of their fine cutlary with their patented Double-D Edges.

'''List Functional Skills:''' <s>Pep</s> People/Social Skills, Good Memorizing of the Salesman Routine; won my Boss OVER GREATLY with that Memorizing

'''List Transferable Skills:''' People/Social Skills, Memorizing + Learning

'''Employer Name:''' Self

'''City, State:''' Ruckersville, VA

'''Job Title:''' Artist, HTML Wiz

'''Start date - End date:''' March 17, 2000 - ????

'''Your primary duties were:''' Drawing, <s>an</s> writing and story-telling the continuing adventures of Sonichu, Rosechu, and myself from LIFE.

'''List Functional Skills:''' Great Hand-Drawing Skills, Story-Creating, Building Designing (Designed CWCville Shopping Mall w. Mayor's Office in CADD), Quick Touch-Typing Skills, Photoshop Experiences

'''List Transferable Skills:''' ALL OF THE ABOVE.

===Education (List most recent first)===
'''Name of School or Institution:''' Manchester High School

'''City, State:''' Chesterfield Co., VA

'''Type of Training or Certification:''' Diploma

'''Start date - End date:''' Sept., 1996 - June, 2000

'''Name of School or Institution:''' Piedmont Virginia Community College

'''City, State:''' Charlottesville, VA

'''Type of Training or Certification:''' Computer Aided Drafting & Design Degree + Certificate

'''Start date - End date:''' August, 2000 - June, 2006

===References (Tip: avoid using family members)===
'''Name:''' Susan Hannifan

'''Relationship:''' PVCC Guidance Counsoler

'''Address:''' 501 College Dr.

'''Telephone number:''' (434)-961-5281

'''Name:''' Rocky Shoemaker

'''Relationship:''' Pastoral Counsoler

'''Address:''' Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church

'''Telephone number:''' (434)-996-9636

'''Name:''' Elizabeth Foss

'''Relationship:''' Pastor

'''Address:''' [blank]

'''Telephone number:''' (434)-296-6976

===Resume Writing Worksheet Job Objective===
"Christopher" Christian Weston Chandler.

I am an Artist with vast experiences in Multiple Art Classes my whole lifetime from Greene County Primary to Piedmont Virginia Community College with multiple Media experiences, with a Manchester High School Diploma and PVCC Degree + Certificate in Computer Aided Drafting & Design (CADD). Since March 17, 2000, I have started inspiration with my Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon creations, ''Sonichu & Rosechu'', and grew further in their life's Stories and Plots in a series of Hand-Drawn and Computer-Edited Comic Books. I also have had and passed Two HTML classes, and created from Notepad Scratch CWC's PokeSite 2, El PokeSite De R.W.C. (Ricardo Weston Chandler; my Spanish Nickname from my taking of Two Years of Spanish at Manchester High), and more importantly, THE Original and First Sonichu Site, CWC's Sonichu Site @ <nowiki>http://sonichuchandler.tripod.com/cwcson.htm</nowiki>. Sadly, after years had passed, in early 2009, my webhosting account was compromised by Hackers + Internet Trolls/Bullies. I've had to go from webhost to webhost Twice to keep my Original Sites Up. Sadly, the Trolls got into them as well. I had pulled the plug and keep my sites offline for Two Months. <s>And recently</s> from Late May, 2009 at GoDaddy.com. And Now, a close real-life friend of mine put together for me the start of what is NOW My Official Sonichu Site, A.K.A., Cwcipedia. As with my past on CWC's Sonichu Site, I have reuploaded my Sonichu Comic Pages and started further expanding in Stories + Bio Pages.

I would like to be Paper-Published with a Comic Book Company like Archie<s>s</s>, Marvel, DC or Darkhorse, complete with Official Merchandise to follow for my Worldwide Fanbase.

Unfortunately, I have heard of impostors trying to claim my Sonichu & Rosechu Franchise (is a good word I think), but I Stand Strong with my continued Legal Use of the copyright © symbol, and the Date of March 17, 2000. I have eye-witnesses at M.H.S. of Sonichu's conception and creation on That Day. And even worse, making money selling Fake Merchandise and Bootleg copies of my Life to 25-YEAR-OLD D.V.D, "Christian Weston Chandler...Yep...I'm on T.V.", which was Originally distributed solely to Family and Close Friends. Trust the Trolls to pose as my Primary School Girlfriend Crush and con a copy out of me late 2008.

I became famous, and I never had to leave my house or go out-of-state or city.

Anyway, I want to MAKE IT ALL OFFICIAL, get me Paper-Published with continuing work, a good, reasonable amount of money, <s>and mak</s> further Enforce my Nine-YEAR-OLD Copyright, and make my future more peaceful. Also, to put those Dang, Dirty Trolls to Rest and At Bay.

Christopher Christian Weston Chandler

August 11, 2009.

===Resume Writing Worksheet Gallery===
<center><gallery>
Image:scan.jpg|The concept of "Most recent" escapes Chris.
Image:scan0001.jpg|Notice how he can't keep himself from including Sonichu in EVERYTHING.
Image:scan0002.jpg|His only references are a guidance counselor that he had almost a decade ago and two pastors at his church.
Image:scan0003.jpg|Largely the same as the other pages except he whines about his websites getting hacked.
Image:scan0004.jpg|Even his shitty DVD is worth mentioning apparently.
Image:scan0005.jpg|He wants to put the dang, dirty trolls to rest.
</gallery></center>

==See Also==

*[[Chris and work]]

==References==
<references/>

{{The Internet}}

[[Category:Historical Documents]]

Chris's resume

2025-05-24T23:18:45Z

Anemichu: /* Analysis */ doesn't the phrase "no discernible skills" fit better with "Slow-in-the-minds"?

On 9 [[September 2009]], '''Chris's résumé''' finally surfaced onto the Internet, through the effort of a troll with a friend who worked in an HR department.

== Analysis ==

As is to be expected for someone with [[Slow-in-the-minds|no discernible skills]] and extremely limited work experience, the résumé is less than impressive. No fewer than three times, Chris pads his résumé by claiming his "volunteer work" for Pokémon league events at [[The GAMe PLACe]] and other locations as actual work experience (when in reality he had no authority, and in fact was himself closely monitored by the actual employees).

Chris's résumé includes a few points where he talks about his [[Chris and the industry|desire to work for a comics publisher]], such as DC or Archie. However, it's unlikely that Chris has sent any work or a résumé to either company, likely simply uploading it to Monster and waiting for others to contact him (not unlike his [[Attraction Sign]]). He is seemingly unaware or unwilling to accept that the industry standard for a professional graphic designer (working for DC or Archie) is not only a well-organized portfolio demonstrating samples of his work but also a bachelor's degree in Graphic Design and demonstrated proficiency in accepted design software such as the Adobe Creative Suite. Non-art work experience is rarely considered unless it is mentioned as an essential part of the job description.

His cover letter can be described as a Sonichu-driven ego rub. Even at a quick glance, one can see that three entire paragraphs are dedicated towards describing Sonichu and Rosechu and how they've made him "internet famous," instead of what it should be about ''(reasons why it would be a good idea to hire him.)'' In typical Chris-Chan fashion, he seems to think that he's in complete control of what ''(Sonichu-related)'' responsibilities he should be given in the organization, and makes a serious no-no by mentioning that the job should have "good pay," which is usually a turn-off to serious employers.

His "quick construction skills from scratch" (especially considering that he's referring to constructing decks in a children's card game) would mean nothing in interviewing for the very job he seeks to obtain. Indeed it would be of no interest to any potential employer, for that matter. Furthermore, according to two people who actually had a chance to play card games with Chris, his deck construction skills [[Mimms and Lucas Q&A#Follow-up|are severely lacking]].

The resume also has a number of CWC-style butcheries of well known idioms, such as the particularly grating phrase "Elbow-greased strength" which only serve to make it most nonsensical.

Furthermore, while the field for "job objectives" offers three lines for a succinct answer, Chris, typical of his [[CWCipedia|rambling style]], attaches three extra ''pages'' of useless junk, thus ensuring that any potential employer will not make any efforts to read the entire résumé.

Also included is a hand-written "Resume Writing Worksheet," a presumably earlier draft with slightly different wording and a greater emphasis on the dang, dirty trolls. As is the nature of resumes, this material is rather repetitive.

= Chris's cover letter =
8/16/2009

Dear Hiring Manager:

I, Christian Weston Chandler, Birth name: Christopher, born on February 24, 1982 in [[Charlottesville]], Virginia, am an artist with vast experiences in multiple art classes with multiple media throughout my whole lifetime from [[Chris's education#Greene County Primary School|Green County Primary School]] to [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|Piedmont Virginia Community Collge]], with a diploma from [[Manchester High School]] and a degree and certificate in Computer Aided Drafting and Design ([[CADD]]) from PVCC.

Since the inspiration and conception of Sonichu, the Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon on March 17, 2000, I have grown further in his stories, plots and adventures in a series of hand-drawn and computer-edited comic books. I also have had and passed two HTML classes, and created from notepad scratch, [[CWC's PokeSite 2!]], [[CWC's Pokésite 2#Now in Spanish|El PokeSite de R.W.C.]] (Ricardo Weston Chandler was my [[Spanish]] nickname given to me during my two years of Spanish in Manchester High), and most importantly, the First and Original website dedicated to Sonichu, Rosechu and their adventures, [[CWC's Sonichu Site]].

I was also noted twice later in the periodicals of Nintendo Power magazine and PVCC's The Forum for being the original creator of Sonichu and all. (See Periodical References below).

With the Sonichu Stie originally located at <nowiki>http://sonichuchandler.tripod.com/cwcson.htm</nowiki>, it stayed online from about 2000 until early 2009, whereas my Sonichu and Rosechu fanbase has grown massively over the years; there were also internet bullies and trolls. And the trolls hacked into and compromised my original Tripod webhosting account. I've had to pull the plug on the Tripod account and move on to another webhosting site. The second webhosting account suffered the same fate as the first, and then I moved to GoDaddy. It got hacked too, and so I pulled the plug on all my websites late May, 2009. I stayed off for about two months, then a gal-pal of mine about that time set up for me a start of what is now the New Original CWC's Sonichu and Rosechu Site; the wikipedia-styled [[Cwcipedia]] at <nowiki>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Main_Page</nowiki>. As I have done on the previous site, I have re-uploaded my Sonichu comic pages, and I am steadily expanding further with more stories and character bio pages.

I would like to be paper-published with a comic book company like Archie, Marvel, DC or Dark Horse comics, complete with Official Sonichu and Rosechu Merchandise I can personally sign-off on to follow for my Worldwide Fanbase.

Accept no imposturous substitutes who claim to be me or have any rights on my Sonichu and Rosechu stuff; I stand strong with my continued use of the Copyright © symbol on each of all my books and original singular art pieces and the date of creation of March 17, 2000. I have eye-witnesses at Manchester High of Sonichu's conception and creation on that date. It also bothers me that the trolls are even selling bootleg copies of my Life DVD, [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|Christian Weston Chandler. Yep...I'm On T.V.]], which was originally intent solely for family and close friend distribution. Trust one of the trolls to snag a copy and rip the vieos from the six-hour DVD-R.

I became famous without having to leave my house or go out-of-state or city.

After recent realization, on about July 17, 2009, of what I want to do, I wish to make it all official; get me paper-published with a comic book company like Archie, Marvel, DC or Dark Horse comics, with continuing work as a comic book artist and story creator/editor, good pay, eventual official Sonichu and Rosechu merchandise that I can personally and officially sign-off on and further enforce my nine-year-old copyright with a more peaceful future.

I feel that my Sonichu and Rosechu and self adventure stories would be an asset for the Comic Book, and all associated, industries.

Thank you for your time and consideration. I hope to have the opportunity to discuss the opening with you in person.

Sincerely

Christian Weston Chandler

Periodical References

''Nintendo Power'', Volume 179, May, 2004, Page 89: "Sonichu's Cwcville Documentary"

''Piedmont Virginia Community College's The Forum'', Volume 1, No. 13, April 26, 2004: "Meet Sonichu: Student Featured in Nintendo Power," By Kari Mitchell, The Forum Assistant Editor.

= The résumé =

The following is Chris's complete résumé, as it was posted on the popular résumé website [[Wikipedia:Monster.com|Monster.com]], with only minor edits for wiki styling.

==Contact Info==

"[[Christopher's name change|Christopher]]" [[Christian Weston Chandler]] 
[[14 Branchland Court|14 Branchland Ct.]], [[Ruckersville, VA]] 22968-9545 
Home: 434-990-0198
Cell: 434-760-0848 
[[CWCipedia|Cwcipedia]]/CWC’s Sonichu and Rosechu Site! 
<nowiki>[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Main_Page http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Main_Page]</nowiki>

==Objectives==

I wish to make my [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] franchise Official, with getting me paper published at [[Wikipedia:Archie Comics|Archie]], [[Wikipedia:Marvel Comics|Marvel]], [[Wikipedia:DC Comics|DC]] or [[Wikipedia:Dark Horse Comics|Dark Horse Comics]], with continuing work as Comic Book Artist and Story Creator/Editor, good pay, eventual Official Sonichu and Rosechu Merchandise that I, personally, can officially sign-off on and further enforce my nine-year-old copyright with a more peaceful future. (See attached pages for more info).

==Experience==
''[Note: for some reason, Chris listed each experience with an "Experience" heading. It is unknown why Chris did this, but for the sake of clarity, all job experience is collated into one heading.]''

Date of Employment: March 17, [[2000]] – Current 
(Self) C.W.C. Comics 
Ruckersville, VA 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: Drawing, writing, coloring and story-telling the continuing adventures of Sonichu, Rosechu and myself from life, creating from scratch and setting up the first original Sonichu Site, [[CWC’s Sonichu Site]], as well as its sibling sites.
* Functional Skills: [[Chris and art|Great hand-drawing skills]], [[Chris and writing|story-telling and editing]], building design from Computer Aided Drafting and Design ([[CADD]]), quick touch-typing skills, [[Getting Foam Ed|great Photoshop experiences]], good HTML skills.
* Transferable Skills: All of the above.

Date of Employment: June, [[2003]] – September, 2003 
[[Cutco]] Cutlery 
[[Charlottesville, VA]] 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: Salesman of their fine [[Pocket knife|cutlery]] with the patented double-d edges.
* Functional Skills: Good people/social skills, great memorization of the salesman routine (won my boss over greatly with that memorizing).
* Transferable Skills: Good people/social skills, memorizing and swift learning.

Date of Employment: August, [[2001]] – [[Lies|October, 2001]]<ref>In the [[Father Call]], Chris tells Kacey's Father that on September 11th he was shopping with his mother because he had ''just'' been fired from Wendy's.</ref> 
[[Wendy's|Wendys]]''[sic]'' Restaurant 
Ruckersville, VA 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: Cleaning trays, tables and carpet/tile flooring, keeping the place neat and serving the customers with kind, understanding help.
* Functional Skills: Elbow-greased strength, good people/social skills.
* Transferable Skills: All of the above.

Date of Employment: March, [[1998]] ''[sic]''<ref>The Pokémon trading card game wasn't released in North America until December 1998, and its official league wasn't founded until the following year.</ref> – June, [[2000]] 
[[Wikipedia:Books-a-Million|Books-a-Million]] 
[[Wikipedia:Midlothian,_VA|Midlothian, VA]] 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: I volunteered to help out as the Gym Leader’s Assistant for the Pokémon Trading Card Game league. I have taught many children how to play the game with care and respect, constructed their 60-card decks from their scattered collection with sound thought and speed skimming skills. I also [[Pedofork|watched over the children]] as I have played with them in the Pokémon Trading Card Game.
* Functional Skills: Elbow-greased strength, good people/social skills, quick construction skills from scratch, speed thinking.
* Transferable Skills: All of the above.

Date of Employment: June, 2000 – June, [[2002]] 
Toys “R” Us 
Charlottesville, VA 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: I volunteered to help out as the Gym Leader’s Assistant for the Pokémon Trading Card Game league. I have taught many children how to play the game with care and respect, constructed their 60-card decks from their scattered collection with sound thought and speed skimming skills. I also watched over the children as I have played with them in the Pokémon Trading Card Game.
* Functional Skills: Elbow-greased strength, good people/social skills, quick construction skills from scratch, speed thinking.
* Transferable Skills: All of the above.

Date of Employment: June, 2002 – June, [[2007]] 
[[The GAMe PLACe|The (Game & Hobby) Place]] 
Charlottesville, VA 

Job Title

* Primary Duties: I volunteered to help out as the Gym Leader’s Assistant for the Pokémon Trading Card Game league. I have taught many children how to play the game with care and respect, constructed their 60-card decks from their scattered collection with sound thought and speed skimming skills. I also watched over the children as I have played with them in the Pokémon Trading Card Game.
* Functional Skills: Elbow-greased strength, good people/social skills, quick construction skills from scratch, speed thinking.
* Transferable Skills: All of the above.

==School Experience==

===Professional Education===

Dates of Attendance: 9/1/1996 to 6/15/2000
[[Manchester High School]]
Chesterfield County, Virginia

* High School Diploma with [[Honor Roll]] Grades.
* Honor Roll Star Pin awarded at Graduation.
* Certificate for serving on the varsity basketball team during my freshman year.

===Academic Education===

Dates of Attendance: August, 2000 to 6/1/2006
[[Piedmont Virginia Community College]]
Charlottesville, Virginia

* Made the Dean’s List with Honor Roll Grades
* Computer Aided Drafting and Design, CADD, Associates Degree
* Computer Aided Drafting and Design, CADD, Career Studies Certificate

==References==

Susan Hannifan

* PVCC Guidance Counsoler
* 501 College Dr. Charlottesville, VA 22902
* 434-961-5281
* shannifan@pvcc.edu

Reverend Elizabeth Foss

* Pastor of [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church]]
* 1901 Thomson Rd. Charlottesville, VA 22903
* 434-296-6976
* elizabethfoss22@earthlink.net

[[Rocky|Rocky Shoemaker]]

* Pastoral Counsoler
* 1901 Thomson Rd. Charlottesville, VA 22903
* 434-966-9636
* revrocky48@gmail.com

Tony Wayne

* Physics Teacher at Albemarle High School/Volunteer Pokémon TCG League Gym Leader
* 2275 Hydraulic Rd. Charlottesville, VA 22901
* 434-975-9300 Ext. 60265
* vastphysics@comcast.net

==Job Objective, Full Story==

I, [[Christian Weston Chandler]], Birth name: [[Christopher]], born on February 24, [[1982]] in [[Charlottesville]], [[Virginia]], am an artist with vast experiences in multiple art classes with multiple media throughout my whole lifetime from Green County Primary School to [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|Piedmont Virginia Community Collge]], with a diploma from [[Manchester High School]] and a degree and certificate in [[Computer Aided Drafting and Design]] (CADD) from PVCC.

Since the inspiration and conception of [[Sonichu]], the [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|Electric-Hedgehog Pokémon]] on March 17, [[2000]], I have grown further in his stories, plots and adventures in a series of hand-drawn and computer-edited comic books. I also have had and passed two HTML classes, and created from notepad scratch, [[CWC's Pokésite 2|CWC’s PokéSite 2!, El PokéSite de R.W.C.]] ([[Ricardo]] Weston Chandler was my Spanish nickname given to me during my two years of Spanish in Manchester High), and most importantly, the First and Original website dedicated to Sonichu, Rosechu and their adventures, [[CWC's Sonichu Site!|CWC’s Sonichu Site]].

I was also noted twice later in the periodicals of [[Nintendo Power]] magazine and PVCC’s The Forum for being the original creator of Sonichu and all. (See Periodical References below)

With the Sonichu [[Chris and English#Spelling|Stie]] originally located at <nowiki>http://sonichuchandler.tripod.com/cwcson.htm</nowiki>, it stayed online from about [[2000]] until early [[2009]], whereas my Sonichu and Rosechu fanbase has grown massively over the years; there were also internet bullies and [[trolls]]. And the trolls hacked into and compromised my original Tripod webhosting account. I’ve had to pull the plug on the Tripod account and move on to another webhosting site. The second webhosting account suffered the same fate as the first, and then I moved to GoDaddy. It got hacked too, and so I pulled the plug on all my websites late May, 2009. I stayed off for about two months, then a gal-pal of mine about that time set up for me a start of what is now the New Original CWC’s Sonichu and Rosechu Site; the wikipedia-styled [[Cwcipedia]] at <nowiki>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Main_Page</nowiki>. As I have done on the previous site, I have re-uploaded my Sonichu comic pages, and I am steadily expanding further with more stories and character bio pages.

I would like to be paper-published with a comic book company like Archie, Marvel, DC or Dark Horse comics, complete with Official Sonichu and Rosechu Merchandise I can personally sign-off on to follow for my Worldwide [[Fanbase]].

Accept no imposturous substitutes who claim to be me or have any rights on my Sonichu and Rosechu stuff; I stand strong with my continued use of the Copyright © symbol on each of all my books and original singular art pieces and the date of creation of March 17, 2000. I have eye-witnesses at Manchester High of Sonichu’s conception and creation on that date. It also bothers me that the trolls are even selling bootleg copies of my Life DVD, [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|Christian Weston Chandler. Yep…I’m On T.V.]], which was originally intent solely for family and close friend distribution. Trust one of the trolls to snag a copy and rip the vieos from the six-hour DVD-R.

I became famous without having to leave my house or go out-of-state or city.

After recent realization, on about July 17, [[2009]], of what I want to do, I wish to make it all official; get me paper-published with a comic book company like [[Wikipedia:Archie Comics|Archie]], [[Wikipedia:Marvel Comics|Marvel]], [[Wikipedia:DC Comics|DC]] or [[Wikipedia:Dark Horse Comics|Dark Horse comics]], with continuing work as a comic book artist and story creator/editor, good pay, eventual official Sonichu and Rosechu merchandise that I can personally and officially sign-off on and further enforce my nine-year-old copyright with a more peaceful future.

“Christopher” Christian Weston Chandler, August 11, 2009

© March 17, 2000 by “Christopher” Christian Weston Chandler.

==Periodical References==

* ''Nintendo Power'' – Volume 179, May 2004, Page 89 – [[Nintendo Power Magazine#The Documentary|Sonichu’s Cwcville Documentary]]
* Piedmont Virginia Community College’s ''The Forum'' – Volume 1, No. 13, 26 April 2004 – Meet Sonichu – Student Featured in Nintendo Power – By Kari Mitchell, The Forum Assistant Editor.

==Additional Information==
'''Career Highlights:''' Near-Daily updates on my Cwcipedia website, and my continued Comic Book Page drawing, coloring, writing and editing. Great hand-drawing skills, story-telling and editing, building design from Computer Aided Drafting and Design (CADD), quick touch-typing skills, great Photoshop experiences, good HTML skills. Good people/social skills, memorizing and swift learning. Elbow-Greased Strength.

'''Skills:'''

* Great hand-drawing skills (3/3)

* Story-Telling and Editing (3/3)

* Building design from Computer Aided Drafting and Design (3/3)

* Quick Touch Typing (3/3)

* Great Photoshop experiences (3/3)

* Good HTML skills (2/3)

* Good people/social skills (3/3)

* Memorizing and Swift Learning (3/3)

* Elbow-Greased Strength (3/3)

'''Professional Memberships:''' [blank]

'''Interests & Hobbies:''' Drawing, building, videogames, music, movies or TV shows, self-reflecting in peaceful situations.

'''Have you served in the military?''' [[Bob|Other Military Family Member]]

'''Do you have security clearance?''' None

'''Are you willing to relocate?''' Yes

'''Are you willing to travel?''' Up to 25% travel

'''Where are you authorized to work?''' US

'''Ethnicity:''' White (Not of Hispanic Origin)

'''Gender:''' Male

== Career Goals ==

'''What job titles are you looking for?'''

Paper-Published comic book author/artist/editor

'''What are your must-haves in your career (e.g., bring pets to work, free coffee)?'''

Good Pay

'''Where would you like to work?'''

[blank]

'''What skills do you want to develop?'''

Better my Hand-Drawing, writing and editing from after 9 years of practice.

'''What salary range are you looking for?'''

[blank]

'''Which companies would you like to work for?'''

Archie Comics, Marvel Comics, DC Comics or Dark Horse Comics

'''What industries would you like to work in?'''

Printing and Publishing

'''What size company would you like to work for?'''

[blank]

'''Which type of company would you like to work for?'''

Public, Private

'''What career level would you like to reach?'''

Experienced (Non-Manager)

==Chris's Resume Writing Worksheet==

===Contact Information===
'''Name:''' "Christopher" Christian Weston Chandler

'''Address:''' 14 Branchland Ct.

Ruckersville, VA 22968-9545

'''Telephone:''' Home: (434)-990-0198 Cell: (434)-760-0848

'''E-mail:''' ChrisChanSonichu@aol.com

===Job Objective===
I am an Artist with Vast Experiences in Multiple Art Classes in my lifetime; with a Degree and Certificate in Computer Aided Drafting & Design from Piedmont Virginia Community...(see attached sheets)

===Work Experience (Tip: List most recent first)===
'''Employer Name:''' Wendys

'''City, State:''' Ruckersville, VA

'''Job Title:''' Basic Employee

'''Start date-End date:''' August, 2001 - October, 2001

'''Your primary duties were:''' Cleaning Trays, Cleaning Tables, Vaccuming & Cleaning the Carpet/Tile Flooring, being kind and serving to the customers, and taking garbage to dumpster.

'''List Functional Skills:''' Elbow Greasing Cleaning, Kind, Polite, People Social Skills.

'''List Transferable Skills:''' Kind, Polite People Social Skills.

'''Employer Name:''' Cutco Cutlary

'''City, State:''' Charlottesville, VA

'''Job Title:''' <s>Sales Rep/</s>Salesman

'''Start date-End date:''' June, 2003 - September, 2003

'''Your primary duties were:''' Salesman of their fine cutlary with their patented Double-D Edges.

'''List Functional Skills:''' <s>Pep</s> People/Social Skills, Good Memorizing of the Salesman Routine; won my Boss OVER GREATLY with that Memorizing

'''List Transferable Skills:''' People/Social Skills, Memorizing + Learning

'''Employer Name:''' Self

'''City, State:''' Ruckersville, VA

'''Job Title:''' Artist, HTML Wiz

'''Start date - End date:''' March 17, 2000 - ????

'''Your primary duties were:''' Drawing, <s>an</s> writing and story-telling the continuing adventures of Sonichu, Rosechu, and myself from LIFE.

'''List Functional Skills:''' Great Hand-Drawing Skills, Story-Creating, Building Designing (Designed CWCville Shopping Mall w. Mayor's Office in CADD), Quick Touch-Typing Skills, Photoshop Experiences

'''List Transferable Skills:''' ALL OF THE ABOVE.

===Education (List most recent first)===
'''Name of School or Institution:''' Manchester High School

'''City, State:''' Chesterfield Co., VA

'''Type of Training or Certification:''' Diploma

'''Start date - End date:''' Sept., 1996 - June, 2000

'''Name of School or Institution:''' Piedmont Virginia Community College

'''City, State:''' Charlottesville, VA

'''Type of Training or Certification:''' Computer Aided Drafting & Design Degree + Certificate

'''Start date - End date:''' August, 2000 - June, 2006

===References (Tip: avoid using family members)===
'''Name:''' Susan Hannifan

'''Relationship:''' PVCC Guidance Counsoler

'''Address:''' 501 College Dr.

'''Telephone number:''' (434)-961-5281

'''Name:''' Rocky Shoemaker

'''Relationship:''' Pastoral Counsoler

'''Address:''' Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church

'''Telephone number:''' (434)-996-9636

'''Name:''' Elizabeth Foss

'''Relationship:''' Pastor

'''Address:''' [blank]

'''Telephone number:''' (434)-296-6976

===Resume Writing Worksheet Job Objective===
"Christopher" Christian Weston Chandler.

I am an Artist with vast experiences in Multiple Art Classes my whole lifetime from Greene County Primary to Piedmont Virginia Community College with multiple Media experiences, with a Manchester High School Diploma and PVCC Degree + Certificate in Computer Aided Drafting & Design (CADD). Since March 17, 2000, I have started inspiration with my Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon creations, ''Sonichu & Rosechu'', and grew further in their life's Stories and Plots in a series of Hand-Drawn and Computer-Edited Comic Books. I also have had and passed Two HTML classes, and created from Notepad Scratch CWC's PokeSite 2, El PokeSite De R.W.C. (Ricardo Weston Chandler; my Spanish Nickname from my taking of Two Years of Spanish at Manchester High), and more importantly, THE Original and First Sonichu Site, CWC's Sonichu Site @ <nowiki>http://sonichuchandler.tripod.com/cwcson.htm</nowiki>. Sadly, after years had passed, in early 2009, my webhosting account was compromised by Hackers + Internet Trolls/Bullies. I've had to go from webhost to webhost Twice to keep my Original Sites Up. Sadly, the Trolls got into them as well. I had pulled the plug and keep my sites offline for Two Months. <s>And recently</s> from Late May, 2009 at GoDaddy.com. And Now, a close real-life friend of mine put together for me the start of what is NOW My Official Sonichu Site, A.K.A., Cwcipedia. As with my past on CWC's Sonichu Site, I have reuploaded my Sonichu Comic Pages and started further expanding in Stories + Bio Pages.

I would like to be Paper-Published with a Comic Book Company like Archie<s>s</s>, Marvel, DC or Darkhorse, complete with Official Merchandise to follow for my Worldwide Fanbase.

Unfortunately, I have heard of impostors trying to claim my Sonichu & Rosechu Franchise (is a good word I think), but I Stand Strong with my continued Legal Use of the copyright © symbol, and the Date of March 17, 2000. I have eye-witnesses at M.H.S. of Sonichu's conception and creation on That Day. And even worse, making money selling Fake Merchandise and Bootleg copies of my Life to 25-YEAR-OLD D.V.D, "Christian Weston Chandler...Yep...I'm on T.V.", which was Originally distributed solely to Family and Close Friends. Trust the Trolls to pose as my Primary School Girlfriend Crush and con a copy out of me late 2008.

I became famous, and I never had to leave my house or go out-of-state or city.

Anyway, I want to MAKE IT ALL OFFICIAL, get me Paper-Published with continuing work, a good, reasonable amount of money, <s>and mak</s> further Enforce my Nine-YEAR-OLD Copyright, and make my future more peaceful. Also, to put those Dang, Dirty Trolls to Rest and At Bay.

Christopher Christian Weston Chandler

August 11, 2009.

===Resume Writing Worksheet Gallery===
<center><gallery>
Image:scan.jpg|The concept of "Most recent" escapes Chris.
Image:scan0001.jpg|Notice how he can't keep himself from including Sonichu in EVERYTHING.
Image:scan0002.jpg|His only references are a guidance counselor that he had almost a decade ago and two pastors at his church.
Image:scan0003.jpg|Largely the same as the other pages except he whines about his websites getting hacked.
Image:scan0004.jpg|Even his shitty DVD is worth mentioning apparently.
Image:scan0005.jpg|He wants to put the dang, dirty trolls to rest.
</gallery></center>

==See Also==

*[[Chris and work]]

==References==
<references/>

{{The Internet}}

[[Category:Historical Documents]]

Autism

2025-05-24T23:16:49Z

Anemichu: /* 3: Interpersonal relationships */ grammar edits

:''For the song, see [[A-U-T-I-S-M]].''

{{Articleofthenow}}
{{HealthDisclosure}}

[[File:Auti.PNG|center]]
[[Image:Autismcard.jpg|thumb|200px|He plays this card a lot, such as during the [[Jail Saga]].]]
[[Image:086-BionicFlag.jpg|thumb|200px|[[Bionic the Hedgehog]] "conquering" autism (and "ATScI3") by confusing windmills with watermills.]]
[[File:Magi-Chan and I around 1218 neurotypical sheeple by nightstarrosechu2891.png|thumb|Image of Chris (and his husband Magi-Chan) around neurotypical (non-autistic) "sheeple."]]
[[Image:Chrisautismmeme.jpg|thumb|Chris explains Autism]]

'''Autism''' is a neurodevelopmental disorder and the lens through which [[Christian Weston Chandler|Chris]] experiences the world. It is impossible to understand Chris's [[Chris and anger|defensiveness]], [[Chris and stress|hypersensitivity]], [[Examples of Chris's Ego|narcissism]], [[Chris and remorse|irresponsibility]], [[Man in the Pickle Suit|paranoia]], [[Greene County Conspiracy|victimhood]], [[Story of My Current Days|self-pity]], and [[Chris and reality|poor grasp on reality]] without understanding his relationship with autism.

Chris was diagnosed with the disorder in his early childhood (at a time when far less was understood about the disorder), and it became a cornerstone of his identity and influence on how he would act, alongside potentially other undiagnosed psychological or neurodevelopmental disorders. It should be noted that Chris's autism is not reflective of the experiences that most people with the disorder have, but since Chris has consistently pointed to autism whenever he does something wrong, and we have no way of knowing what other disorders Chris may have without access to his medical documents, this article serves as good a place as any to discuss the nature of Chris's neuroses, whether they are tied to autism or not.

==Overview==
{{Protip|There is considerable debate on how to refer to the autism community, with some preferring diagnosis-based language (i.e. "Chris has autism"), adjectives (i.e., "Chris is autistic"), or nouns (i.e., "Chris is an autistic"). Since Chris has never appeared to have a preference, the CWCki uses these terms interchangeably.}}

{{w|Autism}} is a neurodevelopmental disorder characterized by difficulty in communication and social interactions: issues that usually surface in childhood and carry on throughout life if not treated early on. The disorder represents a spectrum of different symptoms, behaviors, intellects, and support needs. Autism can also lead to restrictive and repetitive behaviors, intense passions known as special interests, and unusual fixations or approaches to stimulation. No two people with autism are exactly the same, and many common autism traits can even contradict each other (i.e. no eye contact vs. [[creepy stare|intense eye contact]]).

[[Image:461-AutismFight.jpg|thumb|200px|Chris at war with autism (or "ATSIMU") in [[China]]. Too bad you can't fight cannons with [[fangs]].]]

Autism is traditionally associated with either [[Slow-in-the-minds|intellectual disability]] or [[Honor roll|above-average intelligence]] (or both in the case of savants), but most autistic people carry average intelligence. The autism spectrum historically covered a number of related diagnoses, including [[Asperger's syndrome]], [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)|which Chris resents]]. The DSM-5 replaced these diagnoses with a single diagnosis of ''autism spectrum disorder'', divided into three levels based on support needs.

Due to his status as an internet celebrity and lolcow, it goes without saying that Chris has a very unusual case of autism. Since he is arguably the most documented autistic person in modern history, he affects public perceptions of the disorder on the internet. That being said, it is highly likely that Chris has ''many'' other issues beyond just having autism, since Chris has demonstrated problems that can't simply be explained away by the disorder. (For instance, it shouldn't have taken him six or seven years to learn how to speak, even with severe symptoms. Meanwhile, his severe delusions that spiraled later in life demonstrate signs of a schizoaffective disorder.) Without a proper medical diagnosis, in part thanks to Chris's history of avoiding cooperation with people trying to help him understand himself on that level, autism remains the typical scapegoat to explain Chris's behavior, even if the truth may be more complicated.

Chris has built much of his identity around his high-functioning autism. His terror of being associated with severely autistic people causes him to be overly eager to prove his basic competence and cite his success in primary and secondary education. At the same time, his pride from accomplishing these things in spite of his disability has conditioned him to demand outrageous praise for his slightest efforts and infinite patience for his gravest errors. Moreover, Chris's belief that the entire Greene County Board of Education continues to irrationally persecute him for his autism has left him suspicious of opposing points of view and resolute that anti-autistic prejudice is the reason for any of his setbacks. The angst he has over his unsatisfactory graduation is made manifest in [[Sonichu (comic)|his webcomic]] as [[Count Graduon|one of the work's key villains]].

Chris not only seems to think that having autism imbues him with a [[Chris and his ego|special significance]], but also feels that his autism is completely different from that of literally every other person in the world who has autism (which, while not ''totally'' wrong, is a gross oversimplification of the disorder's spectral nature). Chris feels he is naturally better than everyone else and often talks down to people who display knowledge or experience of subjects he is unfamiliar with. During his conversation with [[Father Call|Kacey's father]], Chris downplayed Kacey's knowledge of biology and healthcare despite being proven wrong mere minutes before in a debate over the genetics of autism.<ref>[[Father Call#Financial Situation and Crystal the Tard Baby (11:01-18:28)]]</ref> At the same time, Chris believes he is not responsible for the majority of his mistakes. By being autistic, Chris rationalizes that it is wholly the fault of autism if he [[Twin Falling Towers|he]] [[SheCameForCWC.jpg|makes]] [[Piedmont Virginia Community College#Kicked out of college|poor]] [[Affair with Mother|decisions]].<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 20]]</ref>

==Chris's symptoms==
{{protip|Do not use Chris to bash all autistic people, and do not complain about how he gives autism a bad name. He is one person on the autism ''spectrum''. This article mostly deals with Chris's autism.}}

[[Image:0430-ChristianWTallStack2.jpg|thumb|Stacking objects is a common symptom of autism, and is often one of its first signs in a young child.]]

A 2004 [[Autism papers|psychiatric evaluation]] confirms that Chris has ''autistic disorder''. Though his original childhood diagnosis papers are [[2014 house fire|presumably lost forever]], Chris was diagnosed by actual specialists, not armchair psychologists.

Nevertheless, many [[trolls]] dispute the exact diagnosis of Chris's mental condition, on the basis that his observed behavior is inconsistent with that of various other autistics. CWC-related forums (and other forums, for that matter) have seen numerous testimonials about people who are undeniably autistic but nowhere near as fucked up as Chris has turned out to be, and in general, these forums do not consider Chris to be an example of what most autistics are like. They are well-aware that the condition is a spectrum.

Quite often, autistics are indeed able to learn social skills to a certain extent in the context of intellectual learning. Others can learn social skills the old-fashioned way, usually through joining a group and coming out of their shell. Some can even come off as being completely neurotypical because they have come to realize that they must adapt to others' expectations of what's acceptable if they wish to succeed in life. They may also adopt the alternative approach of "Haters Gonna Hate," surrounding themselves with like-minded people and not giving a fuck about the bullies.

Chris, however, demonstrates a willful ignorance of normalcy, with a sense of entitlement coupled with an expectation that others should not only understand his ridiculous idiosyncrasies, but also accept them at face value. Sometimes, he even wishes to force [[Dating education|them]] upon others.

A layman might come to the conclusion that Chris is not autistic, and he's just a regular, albeit quite idiotic, guy with a few "eccentricities" and personality flaws, or jump to the other extreme and conclude that Chris is completely [[slow-in-the-minds|mentally retarded]] or full-blown schizophrenic. Some folks argue that Chris's autism is so mild that it's barely relevant, while others attribute his entire personality to it.

But the truth appears to be in the middle: Chris's characteristics are most likely a combination of genuine autism, [[Barbara Chandler|bad parenting]], isolation, and other [[Chris and mental healthcare|mental impairments]].

His symptoms are listed below, coded to match [https://archive.ph/YxSOM the official DSM-5 diagnosis:]

===A: Deficits in communication and social interaction===
====1: Social-emotional reciprocity====
Chris struggles with social-emotional reciprocity, the two-way understanding required for successful social interaction.

[[Image:Nnocac.jpg|thumb|150px|left|Trolls manipulated Chris into [[Ohio Trip|driving all the way to Ohio]] to save [[Julie|a fake girlfriend]] – the only things Chris gained from the trip were these fast food receipts. Difficulties in discerning the motives and intentions of others is regularly observed among people diagnosed with autism.]]

=====Understanding others' intentions=====
Chris has difficulty gauging others' thoughts, feelings, ideas, and intentions. He doesn't always understand that these might be different than his own, or how to predict these behaviors. In [[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails|an email between Clyde Cash and him]], he sent Clyde a link to [[The MovingFoward videos|a video]] he made of himself destroying his own [[PlayStation 3]]. He destroyed his PS3 under the egregiously mistaken impression that he'd be given $9,001 for it, which is in itself an indicator of his fundamental inability to gauge others' actual intents and future behavior. He filmed himself doing it specifically to prove to Clyde, who wasn't present for the destruction, that it happened according to the video's objective portrayal. However, he added that if Clyde showed the video to anyone Chris didn't mean to see it without paying him the money, "it can be considered [Clyde's] Word Alone, possible Movie Editing and Actors, and NOT Fact" as though the video would have any less evidential weight on others if he denied to them what he rightfully claimed to Clyde that it showed with enough certitude that he would give him thousands of dollars because of its being shown.

Chris places disproportional importance on literal statements. Chris acted as though he could convince others of a fact contrary to videographic evidence simply by stating it. Another example is virtually the entire [[Liquid Chris#Liquid Saga|Liquid Saga]], where Chris honestly, fervently, pathetically tried to demonstrate what was already blatantly obvious to everyone: that his name is not [[Ian Brandon Anderson]] and that Liquid was not him. He seemed to believe strongly enough [[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!|to become visibly frustrated]] that others might believe Liquid's statements in the face of the obvious that he had to continually counteract those statements with his own as though just the statements were the most important or most effective means of proving what everyone already knew.

Chris is extremely gullible. While autistics can have problems with social cues such as sarcasm, thus being gullible at times, Chris is much more gullible than other autistics, let alone ones that are high-functioning. This is more due to his [[Naïve|inexperience]]. One need only see his extensive [[List of Chris's sweethearts|list of sweethearts]] to see just how easily fooled he is. In addition, not only has he been fooled by trolls (of both sexes) pretending to be female sweethearts, he has fallen for trolls pretending to be [[Shigeru Miyamoto|Nintendo executives]] approaching him about making a ''Sonichu'' game. A telling statement comes from the aforementioned email to Clyde: "even if you upload the video yourself, it '''can be''' considered YOUR Word Alone[.]" (''emphasis added'') Chris might operate on the assumption that if a thing ''can be'' true, it's always reasonable to behave as though it ''is'' true no matter how slight the chance and no matter how much more likely it is to be false.

=====Empathy and sympathy=====
Chris shows very little [[White knight#Chris lacks empathy himself|empathy]] and [[Chris and kindness|concern for others]]. In his [[Chris's Plea to Clyde Cash|plea]] to Clyde, his advice after the suicide of Clyde's brother [[Ryan Cash]] was "find yourself a girlfriend." He asks for ED to [[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007|please understand]] him, because he is an "innocent victim of misunderstanding" — he wants empathy from others, but he can't return the favor. Chris primarily sees other people in terms of what they can provide for him; when accused of overstepping his bounds or other wrongdoing, he has no concept of [[Chris and remorse|remorse or apology]] except as something he must do to continue receiving favors. When forced to apologize, he makes insincere apologies followed immediately by further demands.

When Chris does attempt empathy, it's only when he already sees himself in the person, no matter how big the stretch is. This habit shows up in Chris's justifications for his votes. He voted for [[Barack Obama]] because he was a victim of discrimination – equating Obama's struggle with racism to his own struggle with autistic persecution. He mainly voted for [[Hillary Clinton]] because she was a woman – which Chris has identified as since 2014. He never looked at either candidate's platforms or voted based on actual issues, just based on who he can "see" himself in.

=====Social awareness and boundaries=====
[[Image:Chris holding sign.jpg|thumb|right|The [[attraction sign]] in action. Struggling with social norms and approaching people is a sign of autism.]]

Chris struggles with social approach. He believed that holding up a literal [[sign]] with his requirements for an eligible sweetheart was a socially acceptable way to meet people. He would [[The Tale Of The Crazy Pacer|pace around]] public places aimlessly, and he has difficulty initiating conversations. He sometimes starts off the convo with botched attempts at pickup lines, and [[random-access humor]]. Nowadays, much of his social approach takes the form of meet-and-greet photo ops at [[conventions]] or elsewhere, though he still screws it up.

Chris doesn't understand the concept of boundaries, whether physical or verbal. He kissed people he met seconds ago at [[TooManyGames]]. He was quite handsy with [[Megan]], [[Kacey]], and [[Emily]], and he buried his face in [[Catherine]]'s breasts. He regularly refers to his [[Mary Lee Walsh|superiors]] by their first name, sometimes even by [[Virginia Jeanine Sanford|pet names]] they don't even use. He doesn't seem to understand that different relationships call for different sets of social norms.

Chris lacks a conversational filter. He calls this [[Honest Content|honesty]]; normal people call it social dysfunction. Without provocation, he will tell you about his [[heterochromia|pinkeye]], his [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]], his autism itself, and how he is a [[virgin with rage]]. Only when his [[Barbara|mother]] told him to knock it off did he actually give up telling everyone he was a virgin.<ref>[[Chris-Chan (CWCipedia)#Chris in Person (From THEIR Point of View)]]</ref> He mostly takes interest in himself while talking, only occasionally taking interest in his conversational partner.

All of the above could be explained by Chris's lack of social awareness. One notable instance of this, as revealed in the [[autism papers]], was when two [[Niggos|black]] ladies were speaking to Chris about his love quest, when Chris politely told them that they could not be his girlfriend because they were not white. Based on the report of the examiner, Chris believed he was merely informing the ladies as to his prerequisites for a potential sweetheart while oblivious to the fact he was being racially insensitive.<ref>[[Autism_papers#IDENTIFYING_STATEMENT:]]</ref>

====2: Nonverbal communication====
[[Image:0695-AnnaBD9.JPG|thumb|right|Awkward body language, as Chris displays here, is a common trait of autism.]]
[[File:0419-ChristianIs17-14.jpg|thumb|right|Demonstrating poor eye contact.]]

Chris can't show emotions well with facial expressions and body language. See [[CWC only accepts IN-PERSON FEMALE Encounters|his statement to the women of the world]] if you enjoy Chris appearing in your dreams. His inability to display emotions on his face has been called a "[[The Creepy Stare|dead fish expression]]" (though [[Barb]] displays a similar stare). When he does attempt to have an expression, it looks very cartoonish, possibly because he copied it from [[My Little Pony|actual cartoons]]. Also, notice his inconsistent eye contact in his [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes]] news interview. He typically speaks in a monotone, and his attempts to sound expressive (see [[CWC's Message for Ivy]]) come off as creepy and unnatural. His incompetency with emotional display extends to his [[art]] and comics as well. He has a hard time displaying emotion on his characters' faces, and has even added emoticons :) to the speech bubbles to make up for his lack of ability to communicate through his art and writing alone.

Chris also has very poor [[Facial blindness|facial and vocal recognition skills]]. [[Julie]] was a 13-year-old boy using an obvious falsetto and Chris fell for it. In [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|one chat]], the boy made no attempt to disguise his voice and Chris was none the wiser, disclosing personal sexual details. Two images of different people were used to represent [[Blanca Weiss]], and Chris didn't notice. In an [[Vanessa AIM Chat 9|AIM Chat]] with [[Vanessa Hudgens]], she sent him a link to pictures of Megan Fox, and Chris complimented her on them, even though the two don't even have the same skin color. He didn't realize that [[Emily]] and [[Kim Wilson|Kim]] were the same person, even though their voices and laughs were obviously identical. Chris is inconsistent with his self-portraits and drawings of other people, relying more on color schemes and cosmetics (hair, clothing choices, etc.) than on facial features to distinguish them apart. In his attempt at a [[Barack Obama#White House gag|political cartoon]], he relies on labels and arrows to distinguish the characters instead of exaggerating their facial features like mainstream political cartoonists. He also depicts Obama in a traditional African cap he seldom wears.

[[Image:0485-CWC18th16.jpg|thumb|left|Chris has had very little social interaction since high school. This is one of the few pictures of him with his [[gal pals]], and it only shows him from behind.]]

====3: Interpersonal relationships====
Chris's social dysfunction has caused him trouble with developing and maintaining relationships – platonic or romantic. Many non-autistics have the same problem, but Chris is particularly inept at socializing.

Chris's earliest friend, [[Sarah Hammer]], was more of a bully than a friend; she locked him in the crawlspace of her house, and tried convincing him to eat the berries of a honeysuckle, which can induce [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|diarrhea]]. His high school [[Gal-Pals]] were "hired help": Bob and the principal arranged a deal where they were paid to hang out with Chris. He rarely hung out with them outside school hours, except on his [[My big 18th party|18th birthday]] and at [[prom]].

Chris has had very few friends as an adult. He loses friends regularly, manages to get [[banned]] from his favorite hangouts, and has no contact with any of his beloved high school Gal-Pals. He did have a circle of [[Pokémon League friends|adult friends who played Pokémon with him]], but he lost contact with them once he switched his focus to [[imaginary friends]] and online [[enablers]] after the [[Idea Guys]] managed to destroy what little remaining grip on [[reality]] Chris had.

Despite this, Chris's social life was robust compared to his love life. Chris is in his forties, and he hasn't had a serious romantic relationship or any consensual contact with the opposite sex (aside from a [[Mia Hamm|prostitute]] and [[Affair with Mother|his own mother]], though whether the latter was completely consensual remains questionable), or the [[bisexual|same sex]] for that matter. His foray into [[Dating profiles|online dating]] was a failure, and every one of his [[sweethearts]] was either [[Megan|just a friend]] or a troll. He viewed his desperate search as a [[Love Quest]] – a saga that began on his 21st birthday, and only ended when he got into a [[polyamorous marriage]] with his OCs.

Chris is also estranged from his family outside his parents. Chris's half-brother [[Cole Smithey]] has blocked him on social media. He has little contact with his other half brother [[David Alan Chandler|David]], and knows even less of his half-sister [[Carol Chandler|Carol]].

As with many autistics, Chris does manage to have good relationships with animals, whether [[Patti|real]] or [[Sonichu (species)|fake]]. Animals are more direct and don't have as complex of social rituals as humans. Animals also serve as a "social lubricant" for people on the spectrum. Anyone who knows anything about Temple Grandin can back this up.

===B: Chris's restricted and repetitive behaviors===
To receive an autism diagnosis, the DSM-5 requires restricted and repetitive behaviors [https://archive.ph/YxSOM in at least two of the following four categories.] Chris meets all of them; examples are given below:

====1: Movements and speech====
[[Image:KillThatHexBawx.jpg|thumb|Chris refers to the [[Xbox]] as the "HEXbox," showing both his [[brand loyalty]] and vocabulary of made-up words.|250px]]

Chris often exhibits echolalia, which means he constantly repeats phrases from his favorite television shows, movies and video games, regardless of whether they fit the current situation. In some instances, he calls this [[Random-access humor|"humor"]]. He tends to use solipsistic neologisms; that is, he creates new words that only he himself understands and expects other people to comprehend them. He uses the same terms and [[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor|exact]] [[boyfriend-free girl|phrases]] [[sweetheart from the ground-up|frequently]]. Many articles on this very wiki have been written to explain the resulting [[CWC-isms]].

Autism is also linked to [[speech impediment]]s. Chris has trouble with articulation, and often slurs words together like "[[ED|Essaikapeeia Dramakka Payzh]]" and "[[Chris|Krishnwessonchanler]]." He frequently stutters, clutters his words, and speaks in a higher-pitched register.

Chris's unusual [[mannerisms]] are another sign. He rocks back and forth (dubbed "The Autistic Shuffle"), especially when [[stress]]ed. He uses the same gestures repeatedly, such as his [[stress sigh]], [[The Claw of Fail]], and the infamous [[Dramatic Glasses Removal]]. He feels the need to refer to people by their full names, plainly visible when he talks about himself, [[Clyde Cash]], or [[Adam Stackhouse]].

An overlooked but crucial characteristic affecting all of Chris's physical activity is his display of {{w|hypotonia}}, which refers to a distinct lack of muscle tone — in biological terms referring to tension rather than the colloquial use to describe muscle strength (although raw physical strength is also affected by it) — which affects motor skills as well as stamina. Chris is not only very clumsy, he shows abnormally low muscle strength and gets tired quickly even by [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|simply shuffling around for a couple of minutes]] — which cannot be entirely explained by his lack of physical exercise. Whenever Chris is shown sitting, [[Charlottesville Fashion Square#Chris captured on video|he is spread around like a rag doll]], [[:File:0782-CWCSpread.JPG|hanging limply]] — as his muscles cannot support his entire body properly.

[[Image:Please,_Donate_(720p).mp400001.png|thumb|left|250px|Chris has spent the majority of his adult life in his bedroom.]]

====2: Insistence on sameness====
One of the biggest symptoms of autism Chris displays is his fear of and resistance to change, well beyond the point that it could be even related to his autism. Chris is reluctant to get or even look for a job as he has only worked [[Chris's resume|four months in his entire life]], never came close to moving out [[Affair with Mother|until he was absolutely forced to]], has a very hard time selling or giving up his toys or shirts, has never stuck to a [[Chris and health|diet and exercise program]], [[Attraction Sign|doesn't try new ways to attract women]], and has a very hard time coping with his banishment from his favorite [[the GAMe PLACe|hangout spots]]. His proven tendencies to avoid responsibilities and self-improvement show that he has a very hard time moving on from his childhood lifestyle (where he had no obligations other than school), or simply fears failure of all types.

Chris thinks in absolutes and in terms of clearly defined steps in order to do something. He thinks there must be sex on or by the [[third date]]. He describes his sadness in terms of his '[[heart level]]' and briefly mentioned a [[Scale of Respect]]. He feels that if he just knows the correct steps to getting a [[sweetheart]], he will be able to find one easily. His [[dating education|crash-course in dating]] and [[Dating|suggestions to Blanca]] assume that a relationship should follow a rigidly predetermined progression instead of a natural flow. In an [[Jackie E-mails 23|exchange of e-mails with Jackie]], Chris responded to her frank descriptions of his habits and lifestyle by saying she had exceeded the "Hurtful Truth Level"; while he knows he should be appreciative of hearing the truth about himself, this was the only way he could wrap his brain around the abstract idea enough to be able to tell her he thought she'd gone too far.

Some autistic people follow rules so strictly that it's bordering OCD. Chris however, has the opposite problem. He lived in a [[14 Branchland Court|filthy, unorganized house for many years,]] makes comics with a very inconsistent plot, wears the same [[shirt]] for days at a time, and disobeys the [[Chris and the Law|law]] when it inconveniences him.

[[Image:0064-ChristianWSonic.jpg|thumb|right|250px|Autistics generally have "special interests." These interests can range from familiar subjects popular with most people, to specialised interests and areas of higher study, from elevators to astrophysics, or in Chris's case, Sonic the Hedgehog.]]

====3: Fixations and special interests====
Chris has an extremely narrow range of interests. He seems to only give a damn about video games, cartoons, prowling for his next [[sweetheart]], his initials, and [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]], so much to the point where he practically places [[Sonichu (character)|him]] somewhere in everything he creates. He often wishes to [[dating|combine]] two [[LittleBigPlanet#First Date Level|interests]].

Unnatural relationships with inanimate objects are also a sign of autism; Chris has evident obsessions with his [[medallion]], his game consoles, and any number of other items that clutter up his [[Chris's room|room]]. Since autistics have difficulty maintaining relationships with people, they often end up becoming emotionally dependent on objects, though this symptom is seen much more in autistic children.

Although he does not demonstrate any [[Honor roll|competency]] with them, Chris has a fixation on numbers and statistics that would generally be irrelevant to others. He describes measures in concrete terms (e.g. "5 mies[sic] from the city"<ref>http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_0/Page_2</ref> instead of "outside the city"), and has a particular obsession with times and dates, timestamping nearly every scene in the comic and giving his characters birthdays and middle names that have no relevance to the plot (unless it becomes convenient to "[[pedofork|age up]]" the characters). Needless to say, Chris's tendency to blurt out exact dates and times (assuming he's not talking out of his ass) has made the job of [[CWChronology|CWCki chronologists]] much easier. On the other hand, his haphazard treatment of dates and times in the comic has led to countless [[Continuity in the Sonichu comics#Chronology|continuity errors]].

Chris's fixations also manifest as [[brand loyalty]]. Chris has been loyal to Nintendo, Sega and Sony, to the exclusion of [[HEXbox|Microsoft]]. He's loyal to [[McDonald's]] and dislikes [[Burger King]]. He felt that [[Harry Potter]] was a threat to [[Pokemon]]. His brand loyalty went beyond simple preferences and extended to actual obsessions and hatreds. He'd hype up [[Axe]] and [[Walmart]] in videos. He'd blindly trust advertisements and even include ads of his own in his comics.

Chris's [[transgender]] identity is yet another fixation. According to psychologist Ken Zucker, trans folks are more likely to be autistic than the general population. The link is caused by, among other traits, autistics' tendency to fixate on issues (in this case, gender). Many autistic males (including Chris) also have qualities that can be considered effeminate, such as passiveness. Since they have less social awareness, they may behave in ways that can be considered atypical for either sex and display less regard for gender roles. Chris and many other autistics perceive their quirks as being "female in a male body" or vice versa, and assume that they will fit in better as their desired sex.

His fixation showed itself strongly when Sega changed [[Sonic]]'s arms from tan to [[Sonic Boom protests|blue]]. Chris launched a crusade that ended with him [[26 December 2014|macing an innocent GameStop employee]]; a criminal offense launched entirely by a minor change to a fictional character who happens to be Chris's icon.

====4: Sensory processing====
[[Image:Wrist Warmer.jpg|thumb|left|Chris wearing a wrist warmer with his medallion to reduce sensory discomfort from its chain. Differences in how the body processes sensory stimuli are a common characteristic of autism.]]

Autism affects how the brain interprets the senses. Chris is often either hypo- or hypersensitive to sensory stimulation. Chris often wears his accessories and medallions over top his clothing to avoid skin contact with metals and plastics. This is evident in the way in which Chris wears his watch over the cuff of his sleeve and wraps his medallion through the collar of his shirt.<ref>[[:File:0793-CWCIs24-2.jpg]]</ref> Most obvious however is his [[Fashion#Wrist_warmer|wrist warmer]] which he places on the chain of his medallion. Chris has stated that "[...] it is a part of my necklace; it's a "Wilson" wrist-warmer I use to cover the discomfort of the number of Links back there."<ref>Email from Chris posted in old PVCC thread 162</ref> Loud sounds also bother Chris. He skipped pep rallies in high school,<ref>[[August 2013 Facebook Posts#Actual friendships]]</ref> and has expressed hesitation about visiting bars because of the noise. He is also likely to have taste-related sensory issues, given that he has a [[Chris and nutrition|bland and unhealthy diet]] as well as a [[Pickle#Pickled cucumbers|hatred for pickles]] (a strong-tasting food), which long predates the term's infamous usage to refer to male genitalia.

Sensory dysfunction isn't limited to the five external senses – it extends to internal, "hidden senses" such as balance, body position, [[Obesity|hunger]], thirst, [[biological clock|time]], [[pickles|gag reflex]], and internal body pressure (such as when one has to [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|use the facilities]]).

==Severity of Chris's autism==
[[Image:CWCBitchesDunno.jpg|thumb|left|250px|Chris will be quick to tell you about it, though.]]

Informally, autism may be subdivided into separate classifications based on the intelligence and degree of function the autistic individual possesses; for a general idea, this crude scale could have levels of high-functioning, medium-functioning, and low-functioning. Chris has latched onto this concept and will frequently qualify his condition, saying he has '''high-functioning autism''', or '''HFA'''. Generally, HFA is loosely defined as; the ability to live in the mainstream world as opposed to being institutionalized, having near-normal comprehension, demonstrating fluent speech, and possessing average or above-average intellect. This presents Christian with an easy scapegoat and alibi: he cannot be blamed for his own failures because he has autism, but he does not accept treatment or advice for his "medium" or "low" level autistic traits because he's ''high-functioning'' and therefore, nearly normal. Chris believes he can do much more than any low-functioning autistic could, even as he lived with [[Barbara Chandler|his mother]] well into his thirties, has never had a real girlfriend or held a steady job, and [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|soils his pants]] on a semi-regular basis.<ref>[[Mumble 3]]</ref>

[[Trolls]] have often noted that the "high-functioning" qualifier is '''not''' a clinical diagnosis and is '''not''' recognized by the {{w|DSM-IV|DSM-IV-TR}} or the {{w|ICD-10}}. This usually goes hand-in-hand with questioning the severity and/or diagnosis of Chris's impairment, if not outright calling him a [[List of Chris's lies|liar]]. However, the Chandlers didn't make the "HFA" label up, and compared to autistics who can barely speak and just walk in circles all day, Chris is relatively close to neurotypical; he can talk, drive, write and draw, [[Speech impediment|even if]] [[Chris and art|he's not]] [[Son-Chu#Distracted driving|the best]] [[Chris and writing|at these things]]. A major argument against the HFA label is that Chris himself allegedly stopped speaking at the age of one and didn't speak again until he was seven. This is a major language delay, and he would have been considered low-functioning at the time. This is especially relevant since Chris was diagnosed in the eighties, and HFA/Asperger's was only recognized in the English-speaking world in the 1990s. At the time of his diagnosis, being autistic required at least a delay in speech acquisition, if not complete muteness.

The newer {{w|DSM-5}} ''does'' split autism into three different levels of severity based on the amount of support needed. The new term for "High-Functioning Autism" is "Autism Spectrum Disorder [[Vidya|Level 1]]", often subtitled 'Requiring support'. Chris is most likely on the lower functioning end of Level 1, though his developmental delays in early childhood, significant difficulties navigating social situations and stunted life skills could still put him on the cusp of Level 2, meaning 'Requiring substantial support'.

Semantics aside, though, it's clear that Chris is far from normally-functioning. Only an [[Autism papers|updated]] [[28 October 2011#Arraignment, plea bargain, and sentencing|psychological profile]] would really provide insight into the complex and controversial mixture of autism and mental illness that is present within Christian.

{{clear}}

==Onset and diagnosis of Chris's autism==
{{quote|No one GIVES A SHIT that you are autistic, they NEVER DID.|[[Jackie E-mails 23|Jackie]], telling Chris something he'll flat out ignore.}}
[[Image:SchuComic10P09.jpg|thumb|Now GodBearJesus can't get him to shut up.]]

Chris's version of how he developed autism is best explained in the [[Song of Christian]] video. There he explains how a [[Abusive babysitter|babysitter]] locked him in a room filled with toys at around age 1 1/2. After crying for hours, he emerged from the room unable to talk; as Chris himself puts it, "[[Chris and religion|God]] put the mute button on me."<ref>[[Song of Christian#The actual poem]]</ref> (This implies that Chris could talk before this incident, which directly contradicts Chris's own parents stating that he never spoke until around the age of seven.) Most specialists claim that these symptoms of autism begin to show around that age anyway,<ref>{{w|Autism#Characteristics|Wikipedia: Characteristics of autism}}</ref> so even if the events of the story happened, the babysitter didn't cause the autism. It is far more likely that Chris's parents simply looked for anyone to blame for Chris's sudden loss of language development, even a random babysitter. Notably, Chris has diverged from this story before, having claimed at least once that he was intentionally "injected" with autism by doctors when he was a child as if that were even possible. Nevertheless, it speaks volumes on the [[List of Chris's lies|veracity]] of the former account if he can't even keep his story straight, not to mention that Chris probably [[Naïve|has little idea on the causes of autism]] anyway.

As for how Chris ''actually'' became autistic, studies have shown that there is a [https://archive.is/PROpt positive correlation between the age of the mother and the risk of autism]. Given that [[Barbara Chandler|Barb]] was 40 years old when she gave birth to Chris, this is a likely explanation.

It is also worth noting that [[Bob]] was an engineer, and studies have found higher autism rates among children of engineers (and other technical occupations).<ref>https://archive.is/BHfBO</ref> Bob's granddaughter [[Savannah]] is also autistic.

It is currently unclear how Chris came to be considered as "autistic," although Chris has claimed that his parents possess official documentation about this in a safe. When pressed to release this information, he provided a [[autism papers|2004 psychiatric evaluation]] that states Chris was diagnosed with autism when he was "around age five or six." However, there's no way to be sure if the evaluator simply wrote down Chris's responses to his questions or independently verified them. (For example, Chris might not remember his exact age when he was diagnosed, but you'd think his medical records could be more precise than "five or six.") By the time of the Chandlers' legal battle with Greene County, Chris's autism seemed to have become a universally accepted fact, but the details of how, when, and where Chris was diagnosed remain a mystery.

When recounting his childhood, Chris usually skips straight from the "evil babysitter" incident to age seven, so we know very little about what (if any) treatment he received during this crucial period of development. In a [[CWCipedia]] [[mailbag]], Chris claims that when he was young, his parents were told he would never be able to read, write or function on a normal level. He and his doctors have now upgraded his condition to "high-functioning," but apparently his incredibly abysmal upbringing has actually allowed it to progress to mid-functioning at best.

In his "Song of Christian" video, he explains that his mother took him to the toy department and coaxed him to read aloud the names of Go-Bots, and later [[Transformers]]. Chris says he began speaking again when he was seven – that is, in [[1989]], when the Transformers line was on its last legs and the Go-Bots line had long since vanished. This would seem to indicate that this form of "therapy" had to have gone on for several years before producing any results.

{{clear}}

==Persecution==
Chris attended [[Greene County Primary School]], apparently without incident, from age 5 until age 9. Problems arose for him in the fourth grade at [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]], where he alleges that the faculty wanted to remove him from mainstream classrooms and send him to what he calls an institution. He also claims that the teachers at the school held him down and recorded his screams. Chris frequently cites this as evidence that the school was senselessly cruel towards him, for no reason apparent to him except an innate fear and distrust of autistic people. More probable, given Chris's ongoing behavioral issues, is that he threw a temper tantrum so big it forced the faculty to physically restrain him while refusing to restrain himself. There's no way to know if Greene Elementary treated Chris unfairly, but the incident does suspiciously resemble Chris's [[arrest]] in July 2005. The Chandlers sued to prevent the school board from removing Chris from mainstream education before ultimately relocating to Chesterfield County to continue Chris's mainstreaming there.

Chris frequently brings up that the reason people used to [[Kick the Autistic|be cruel to him]] in his childhood was because "they did not understand Autism." In the [[1980s]]. When autism had been known for around 40 years. When asked about why they did not understand, Chris delivers his canned response of "I do not know."

There's no way to know how much of Chris's attitude about the Greene County crisis is based on his personal recollections or what he was later told by his parents, who themselves seem unusually paranoid about the county's vendetta against their family. However, the result of the incident is clear: Chris emerged from adolescence firmly believing that many people not only misunderstand autistic people but hate and fear them. He seems to believe this prejudice is based not on a person's actions (e.g. throwing fits and irrationally screaming) but on a person's mere identification as autistic, regardless of function. Given Chris's fear of low-functioning autistics, he may in fact think this prejudice is [[Chris and hypocrisy|perfectly justified]], but wrongfully targeted at a high-functioning individual. Of course, in Chris's mind, he may as well be the only high-functioning autistic in the Universe, so he is the one and only innocent victim in "everyone's favorite game, [[Kick the Autistic]]."

Chris's tactful and sensitive comments on a news story about a woman with [[Asperger syndrome]] being raped revealed that he believes the media, like the rest of the world, has a bias against autism similar to "{{w|Missing white woman syndrome|Missing White Woman Syndrome}}," and that the story wouldn't have been reported if the victim was a woman with "proper" autism.

==Chris's misconceptions about autism==
It's not clear that Chris has any understanding of what, precisely, autism is, except that a) he has it, b) it's a bad thing, and c) [[Chris and his ego|he's a brave little boy for living with it]]. His song "[[A-U-T-I-S-M]]" sums up his attitudes about the disorder:

{{quote|A-U-T-I-S-M: what does it mean? Silence and friends unseen! A few brains as well: that is autism! And that makes us seem special to you!|Chris, attempting to spell out autism in more ways than one}}

To Chris, that's all it is — a condition that makes you a bit smarter than normal human beings and mysteriously makes people not want to be your friend.

[[File:Mii.jpg|thumb|right|Chris's personification of autism for beating up in ''Super Smash Bros.'']]

Chris also seems to only be aware of the symptoms of autism that fit in with his odd, pseudo-Bohemian lifestyle. Asexuality is very common in autistic people; this is because any form of romance or sex may be too intimate for an autistic mind to cope with. This completely contradicts Chris's "[[Love Quest]]" and suggests that he is actually trying to compensate for his inability to feel true sexual attraction, even if that means becoming a genuinely disturbing pervert. His tone-deafness for singing is fairly unusual for an autistic individual as well – autistic people tend to have stronger pitch perception, and they are more likely to have perfect pitch than the general population.

Chris [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)|considers himself to have "Helped cultivate the First Generation of Autistic People,"]] suggesting that he believes [[Chris and his ego|he is a prevalent figure in the autistic community.]].

In a [[May 2010]] [[Some Favored Comedians|video]], he stated that our society is spending so much time on the Internet that ''everyone'' is becoming autistic.<ref>[[Toucher and Rich Segment#Chris's Response|Chris responds to Toucher and Rich, May 2009]]</ref><ref>[[Some Favored Comedians]]</ref> This further proves that people with little to no social contact shouldn't attempt social commentary. That, and Chris has no fucking clue what his own disorder is actually ''like''. In [[November 2010]], he tried to use this excuse to guilt trip [[Jackie]] into being sorry for yelling at him, which worked as well as you'd expect.<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 23]]</ref>

Chris's failure to understand the symptoms of autism may well explain some of his odd behaviors. Due to lack of social activity and poor theory of mind, Chris doesn't seem to realize that his behaviors are what they are, as best demonstrated by his belief that [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|it is normal for an adult to shit themselves]]. Chris does not recognize the differences between himself and others, and this applies to the differences between himself and neurotypicals - and, seeing no differences, he believes his autism to have been thoroughly conquered, even while embodying every single trait of it.

===Chris on the causes of autism===
There's a broad scientific consensus that autism largely arises from genetic factors. Chris's own case is consistent with the theory that children born to older parents are at greater risk of developing autism.<ref>https://archive.ph/ckSNI</ref> Bob and Barb were 54 and 40, respectively, when Chris was conceived.

Chris's own expressed views on the root causes of autism are all over the map. He's espoused a few different theories at different times and in different situations. His oldest theory, dating back to the [[Song of Christian]] in the late 1990s, is that the [[abusive babysitter]] was responsible for his condition. In [[Mumble 3|his arguments with]] [[Clyde Cash]] in early 2009, he said that "scientifically speaking, [autism] has possibly come from a drug, or otherwise it may possibly be genetic," and that the babysitter incident merely "brought out the, uh, curse that was buried within me."

When explaining his condition to [[Father Call|Matt Devoria]] late in the fall of 2009, Chris insisted that autism has no genetic factors. In that instance, however he had an obvious agenda. He hoped to convince Matt that any children he fathered with Matt's daughter [[Kacey]] wouldn't wind up inheriting his condition; because of this, it's difficult to say exactly how sincere he happened to be at that moment.

To muddle the issue even ''further'', in [[Mailbag 12]], Chris blamed the cause of autism on a shot "the doctor's [sic] optionally give to the child after birth," apparently in reference to the highly disputed {{w|MMR vaccine controversy|urban myth}} alleging that childhood vaccinations lead to autism. It's not likely that Chris even has that much of an awareness of the facts and assertions of said myth, and was probably looking for a throwaway excuse to deny any hereditary factors.

In a [[Some Favored Comedians|video]] in 2010, Chris said the Internet made people autistic, likely confusing the hyperbolic claim often made jokingly to that effect with fact. Ironically, Chris's excessive use of the Internet in place of human interaction has probably done more to exacerbate his symptoms than almost anything else.

In his [[Autism Tutorial Part 1|Autism Tutorial]] from early 2011, Chris slewed back toward a more mainstream view, discussing the genetic factors behind autism and complaining about how his parents conceived him late in life. He also, however, warned viewers that smoking, drinking, or exposure to car exhaust could cause dangerous genetic damage that might result in autistic children.

===Chris versus Asperger syndrome===
{{see also|Asperger syndrome}}

Chris is easily outraged by any attempt to associate or confuse autism, high-functioning or otherwise, with Asperger syndrome, a similar condition now considered by many experts to overlap with HFA on the autistic spectrum. In fact, Asperger syndrome was eliminated and replaced with "autism spectrum disorder, level 1" in the new DSM-V, making both the condition and "high-functioning autism" one and the same.<ref>https://archive.is/TPWcu</ref>) At times, Chris has stated that he dislikes Asperger syndrome because sufferers of the disorder supposedly steal sympathy away from autism awareness. He has also claimed that the name is too close to "ass burger" or "ass booger" for his taste.<ref>[[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)]]</ref> In the early days of the [[CWCipedia]] [[Mailbag]], asking Chris about Asperger syndrome was the most effective way to troll him; this culminated in the creation of [[Asperchu]].

In the present, Chris simply hates Asperger syndrome because it reminds him of how angry he got the last time someone brought it up — in other words, a completely unjustifiable opinion. Chris has declared himself "close-minded" on the subject, dismissing all scientific opinion contrary to his own, and angrily refuses to be convinced that he does not occupy a more favorable (exactly what that means depends on whether Chris is looking for pity or adulation at the time) tier of the spectrum.

===Chris on Neurotypicality===



Chris also has little understanding of the concept of neurotypicality, the state of lacking any kind of neurologically-atypical traits. Some people on the autism spectrum, especially those with [[Asperger syndrome|Aspergers]], are deemed to be of above-average intelligence or possess a special talent in another field like music or art. Chris has taken that to mean that he himself must also be in that same group of autistics, where he is much smarter than the average person. This is especially prevalent during the [[Dimensional Merge]] era, where he refers to non-believers as "neurotypically hindered."

===Alternate phrasing===
{{quote|I have a dementia problem that makes me fall mentally blank|Chris substituting dementia for autism<ref name=doopietweet>[[2017 tweets#Doopie defends Chris]]</ref>}}
Chris sometimes uses alternative ways to describe his autism, such as when he hears a new phrase - inapplicable as it may be - and tries to shoehorn it into use.

This was seen during [[April 2017]], when Chris attended care-giving classes in order to help out his [[mother]] around the house. During the classes, Chris learned of the term "dementia", mistakenly believing it to be an umbrella term for mental conditions in general.<ref>[[Live Game Stream - C-Log 04272017]]</ref> Chris applied the term to himself, in reference to his autism disorder, in video<ref>[[Live Game Stream - C-Log 04192017 - The Shirt]]</ref> and on [[Twitter]]<ref name=doopietweet></ref> mid-month. Chris ceased misusing the word afterwords.

More absurdly, when Chris learned of the fictional power "Avatar State" from the animated series ''[[Avatar: The Last Airbender]]'', he also tried applying it towards his autism disorder. In a tweet from [[January 2021]], he claimed that his "zombie and robot-like state" (such as when he was photographed at [[The GAMe PLACe]]) is an advanced form of the Avatar State.<ref>[[January 2021 social media posts#Successful heavy meditate hour]]</ref>

==Chris on autism education==
Chris is a firm believer in mainstream education for children with autism, a trait he doubtlessly picked up from his parents, who went to [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|incredible lengths]] to keep him in mainstream classrooms throughout his school years. He had special education classes in addition to his mainstreaming - [[coping]] skills classes during both middle and high school.<ref>[[Jackie E-mails]]</ref>

[[Mailbag 12|When asked for his advice on how to raise an autistic child]], Chris replied, "...Most Importantly, MAINSTREAM; let your child be free to communicate and associate with the Normal Society. Special Education is okay, but that will not do in the longest run." Later, [[Mailbag 15|for advice on how "to succeed despite being afflicted with Asperger's"]], Chris's only response was, "My advice is to Mainstream the child."

During a [[04232010 - Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless|video from April 2010]], Chris read off a lengthy printout of autism-related information. After quoting a passage about how the education of autistic children should be undertaken by trained professionals in specialized settings, Chris offered his own opinion.

{{quote|As for me though, I highly recommend mainstreaming, lettin' 'em go though normal life. I mean yeah, give 'em the special treatment while they're young... but when you get 'em in elementary or middle school... or high school, mainstream is the way to go.|Chris, [[04232010 - Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless|Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless]]}}

In short, Chris believes that the approach that produced the man as we know him today (i.e. ignoring the problem and doing nothing to help it) is the best possible way to raise and educate children with autism.

==Autism cured?==
[[Image:454-CWCsPossibleFuture.JPG|thumb|Autism appears to be in Chris's future...]]

Chris's greatest dream is that his autism might one day be cured (although [[Pixelated PS3|in 2006]] he would have unhesitatingly sacrificed such a cure in order to obtain a [[PlayStation 3]]). There are instances of children inexplicably recovering from the symptoms, but there is no known cure for autism that can simply be applied to everyone like Chris's "[[Sonichu 10|homo vaccine]]." Imagine the surprise of the mental health community, then, when Chris revealed in [[March 2009]] that he had overcome his autism once and for all:<ref>[[Sarah May Skype Logs#Chris is over his autism]]</ref>

:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' I'm not going to blame it on my autism; I have realized that I am over that now.
:'''Sarah May:''' Over what?
:'''Sarah May:''' Over your autism?
:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' yes
:'''Sarah May:''' . . .
:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' anyway, what is it that you want to do?
:'''Sarah May:''' Christian
:'''Sarah May:''' Are you serious?
:'''Sarah May:''' Autism is not influenza
:'''Sarah May:''' You don't 'get over it'
:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' I've broken out of my autistic shell, and I am better able to socialize in public, with the past practices online.

Chris claimed during the same chat that he may not be making sense due to a virus, easily allowing for him to retract this. Fortunately, Chris has discovered that [[stress]] is a more socially popular scapegoat for his personal shortcomings. Of course, people learn to manage stress, but what do you expect?

As of [[May 2009]], Chris seemed to have regained his autism and was back to blaming it for all his problems, seemingly believing that autism is as easy to shake/regain as the common flu. However, [[November 2009]] saw Chris again claiming to have been miraculously cured, as stated at the end of part 2 of his [[Sonichu Powerpoint]] presentations, where he described himself as a "high-functioning autistic ''recovered''." A [[December 2009|month later]], Chris again backpedaled; in response to ED's claim he was "suffering" from autism, he [[Chris chan (CWCipedia)|agreed]] that "''I still am for real.''"

Chris's flip-flopping self-diagnosis simply illustrates his misunderstanding of his problems. Since autism is his scapegoat for when he fucks up, to him that's really all it is — a disease that makes people fuck up all the time. Therefore, when he fails, he has a bad case of autism, and when everything is going well (such as when he believes he has a girlfriend), he thinks the autism has gone away. What Chris really wants, then, is not a cure for autism but a life in which nothing happens that he would need to blame on his autism; that is, a life in which he has a girlfriend and nobody criticizes him.

In June of 2016, he [[Announcement 06292016#Announcement 06292016-2|claimed to have cured his autism]] using [[Subliminal Frequency Hypnosis|binaural beats]]. He stated that the track made him think clearer and [[Chris and socialization|interact better with others]]. However, he has shown no improvement in the quality of his recent videos, and he would continue to make autism-related content in the future.

==Things Chris has not blamed on his autism==
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif|What did you expect?]]

==Chris and other autistics==
===Chris on other autistics===
{{Dated}}
Listening to Chris go on about "us TRUE and HONEST autistics," you might think he has some kind of misplaced sense of autistic solidarity. But this would merely be dumb, and Chris-chan always shoots for both dumb and repugnant, so the reality is that he doesn't give a shit about anyone's autism but his own.

Disgustingly, but perhaps not surprisingly, Chris detests [[Slow-in-the-minds|low-functioning autistics]] in the [[Chris and hypocrisy|exact manner]] that he fears normal people will detest him. In [[Mailbag 25#High functioning babble|Mailbag 25]], he compares those with low-functioning autism with those who suffer from severe retardation or severe brain damage, thinking that they would have their arms linked together, have deformities, be confined to wheelchairs or crutches and drool and grunt and growl. He has also described them in extremely cruel and derisive terms, calling them "windows to hell"<ref>[[IRC (17 December 2008)]]</ref> and compared them to "zombies."<ref>[[Mailbag_5#In which Chris speaks ill of the handicapped|Mailbag 5]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag_11#Elevators are important for the handicapped, so they don't want any phobias|Mailbag 11]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag_25#High functioning babble|Mailbag 25]]</ref> The irony of his resentment toward "low-functioning" autistic people is that he has a severely autistic cousin, as revealed in the [[autism papers]]; this probably means that either Chris is not aware of his own relatives (very probable), or he has disowned members of his own family on the basis of them having the same medical condition that he has (albeit more severely affected by it), being the autism-Nazi he is.<ref>[[Asperger syndrome]]</ref> Furthermore, many much lower functioning autistics lead far more independent and fulfilling lives than Chris does.

He has once expressed a disdain for others with high-functioning autism, with HFA being one of the characteristics excluding a woman from being a [[attraction sign|potential sweetheart]]. He explains that he refuses to date a girl with any form of autism because he fears that seeing them will make him think about what he might be like if he had anything other than high-functioning autism.<ref>[[Chris_chan_(CWCipedia)#Chris_Chan_on_sticking_things_up_b.2A.2A.2Ahole.|Chris chan (CWCipedia)]]</ref> Meanwhile, he looks at people with [[Asperger Syndrome]], who are on roughly the same part of the spectrum as him, as dirty whores trying to somehow steal the limelight from "real" autistics (ironically, many feel this way about Chris).

Chris has only once included another autistic person in his comics. In emails with [[Sarah Jackson]], she told Chris that her sister was also a high-functioning autistic. When Sarah was included in [[Sonichu 9#Episode 19: Date Ed (Even Though the Idea Sounds Dated)|Episode 19]], so was her sister, [[Rita]]. When Rita was given dialogue after Sarah's [[death]], what she said made so little sense grammatically (even by [[Chris and writing|Chris's standards]]) that it is hard to see it as unintentional. It can, therefore, be speculated that Chris, thinking his own autism so much better than anyone else's, was attempting to make Rita seem as unintelligent as he assumes other autistics and people with mental disorders are.

His stance on autistic people would seem to shift a little in 2011, with him further believing himself to be a spokesperson for autism. Chris had attempted to educate people about autistic people in his ''LittleBigPlanet2'' series, the [[Autism Tutorial]]. The second part of the series had Chris decreeing that all autistic people should "man and woman up, respectively" in order to socialize with other people. In the extra part of the series, Chris slapped his representation of Hans Asperger out of the belief that he "selfishly put his ill name" with association with the disorder.

Chris has also claimed that his long-time friend [[Anna McLerran]] is autistic.<ref>[[Jail Letter - 20 October 2021]]</ref>

===Other autistics and Chris===
It should be noted that not all autistics are like Chris. Every person's experience with autism is different and every autistic person has a different combination of symptoms, social skills, sensory issues, empathy, special interests, routines, repetitive and restrictive behaviors and more.

A common analogy for this is that an autistic brain is a "melting pot" or "soup" of symptoms and behaviors <ref>https://autisticadvocacy.tumblr.com/post/113883336014/shades-of-slander</ref>. One person's soup might just be a bit salty, but still good, as they might show a few symptoms but still live a happy life. Another person's soup might taste horrible without seasoning, as they might need some support to function day-to-day.

It just so happens that Chris's soup is a disgusting mixture of sewage, [[April 16 Fetish Vids|Fanta]], rotten eggs and [[Semen|comeuppance]], as he has an extremely unfortunate combination of symptoms and behaviors.

==Autism Deferred Disposition==
{{main|Autism disorder deferred disposition}}
{{quote|and the court finds by clear and convincing evidence that the criminal conduct was caused by or had a direct and substantial relationship to the person's disorder or disability|Excerpt from §19.2-303.6<ref name=autismcard>https://law.lis.virginia.gov/vacode/19.2-303.6/</ref>}}

In [[August 2021]], Chris was arrested for the charge of [[incest]] on his [[mother]]. During the court proceedings, his court-appointed lawyer, [[David Heilberg]], filed on 5 [[August 2022]] for §19.2-303.6<ref>[[:File:Court Record - Greene Circuit Court - Incest - (Chris, CR22000141-00) - 9 August 2022 Pleadings-Orders.png]]</ref> - deferred disposition based on Chris having autism, which the court granted. In effect, the law provides that if the court would be justified in a finding of guilt, and that autism had a direct cause in Chris's actions in being a motherfucker, that any further proceedings could instead be deferred and Chris put on probationary terms. While the following events are unclear, due to the case being sealed at Heilberg's request (although public records still revealed information), the court appears to have granted the deferred disposition motion.<ref name=autismcard></ref>

==References==
<references/>

==See also==
* [[Asperger syndrome]]
* [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)]]
* [[A-U-T-I-S-M]]
* [[Autism Tutorial]]
* [[Chris and psychology]]
* [[Kick the Autistic]]
* [[Slow-in-the-minds]]
* [[Stress]]

==External links==
*[https://web.archive.org/web/20180626224122/https://autism.wikia.com/wiki/Christian_Chandler Christian Chandler on the Autism Wiki]

{{Health}}
{{Love quest}}

[[Category:Autistic Spectrum Disorders]]
[[Category:Physical characteristics]]

Liquid Chris

2025-04-22T01:00:56Z

Anemichu: /* Irony */ added some elaboration on the metal gear reference

{{Troll}}
{{Imposter}}
{{quote|Chris initially wanted to ignore Liquid. We had to tell him that if he didn't publicly refute Liquid, it could be used against him to steal the Sonichu copyright. Chris is lazy and, by default, ignores most trolling.|[[The Man in the Pickle Suit]]<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/yt-16-06-we-need-immediate-funds-please.31624/post-2351871</ref>}}

{{Infobox Person
| title = Liquid Chris
| name = Christopher Morton Duckworth Jon Duckworth
|image = CChanSonichuCWC.jpg|size=250px
|aliases = CChanSonichuCWC Chris Chandler<ref>[[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!]]</ref> Jeff<ref>[[Exposing Jeff]]</ref> "The Previous Chris" "The Other Chris"<ref>[[11052009 Kacey, I Love You, and I Need You]]</ref>
|year = 1990
|gender = [[MALE]]
|nation = [[United States|American]]
|race = White
|spouse = [[Kacey]]
|siblings = SimplySpoons (brother, musical body double)
|occupation = Freelance comic book artist [[SHOWDOWN: The TRUE CWC Confronts The FAKE|Musician]] Doctor of Internal Medicine
|saga = {{saga|liquid|cn}}
}}

'''Liquid Chris''' (real name: '''Dr. Christopher Morton Duckworth'''; born July 1990) claimed to be the [[TRUE and HONEST]] Christian Weston Chandler, and the one and only creator of the [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]] [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]]. In reality, he was simply an impersonator on [[YouTube]] who initially just made videos to amuse himself and his friends. Chris portrayed Liquid on YouTube and in the PVCC Forums, while his identical twin brother '''Jon Duckworth''', a musician, portrayed him during the Sing-Star Challenge.

Liquid Chris gets his nickname from ''[[Metal Gear|Metal Gear Solid]]'', a video game which featured a storyline of the clone "brother" of the player character, Solid Snake (hence why [[Christian Weston Chandler]] is referred to as Solid Chris in this saga, as he will be for the remainder of this page). Eventually, Solid discovered Liquid, and he actually believed that he was an impostor trying to take credit for his glorious creation, rather than just being an impersonator. Once he was in Solid's sights, Liquid decided to up his game by playing along with his rivalry with Chris-Chan (as did his fans), and became a full-time [[Trolls|troll]].

Liquid insisted that he was the real Chris-Chan, and chose to address his counterpart as the impostor [[Ian Brandon Anderson]], based on the initials of his IBAChandler YouTube username. Liquid eventually got into fights with Solid over [[Kacey]]'s heart, briefly halting production of videos when Liquid was kidnapped by Solid (portrayed by the other twin filming the video). Liquid made a triumphant return to defend Kacey's honor, and they retired from trolling Chris after "getting married". This saddened Chris, though he quickly got over it and moved onto finding another [[sweetheart]] after about a day.

__TOC__

{{clear}}

==Prologue==
On 21 [[June 2009]], Liquid would create his youtube channel 'CChanSonichuCWC', under the premise that he was the real [[Christian Weston Chandler]]. Solid Chris did not notice his channel at first, until 21 [[July 2009]]. Liquid would upload [[CChanSonichuCWC_Videos,_June-July_2009#Now_Selling_the_OFFICIAL_and_ORIGINAL_SONICHU_Merchandise_of_CWC,_NO_FAKERIES_OR_IMPOSTORY|a video]] where he talked about him selling offical [[Sonichu]] merch at Otakun, an anime and video game convention.

This video caught the attention of [[Jack Thaddeus]], who sent the video to his daughter Samantha, stating 'This man was at otakon, He made some MAD CASH! He made an opening confession and all. Tell me what you think?'. In reality, this was [[Solid Chris]] pretending to be Sam in an attempt to get his [[PSN]] accounts back from Jack. Upon seeing the video, Solid would [[REAL_Protest_against_the_FAKE#YouTube_comments_from_Ian|rage in the comments]] and make a [[REAL_Protest_against_the_FAKE#Video|response video]] to Liquid, offically starting the saga.

==A challenger appears==
[[Image:Torture.jpg|Liquid torturing the impostor.|thumb]]
[[Image:Liquid VS Solid.png|"There's room for only one Chris, and one Mayor!" |thumb]]
:''See also: [[CChanSonichuCWC Videos, June-July 2009#Antebellum|Liquid's Antebellum Videos]]''

At the end of the month a new YouTube account, [https://web.archive.org/web/20100522150728/http://www.youtube.com/user/CChanSonichuCWC http://www.youtube.com/user/CChanSonichuCWC], appeared with a simple premise: that the ''real'' Christian Weston Chandler (henceforth '''Liquid Chris''') was back online after a long absence, during which he lost his account to hackers, so all the weirdness on "CChanSonichu" was the work of hacking trolls, and he announced that he was ready to resume posting HONEST content on his new account. This new CWC posted four more videos, much of which were [[parody|parodies]] of earlier videos by Solid Chris.

{{quote|How else would I get fan art, if I was not the original creator of Sonichu?|Liquid Chris, [[CChanSonichuCWC_Videos,_June-July_2009#Update:_I_am_Still_the_Real_Christian_Weston_Chandler_Despite_LIES_AND_SLANDER._Also.2C_Some_Fan_Art|3 July 2009]]}}

Notably, Liquid Chris sported:
* An official [[Sonichu medallion]] (made out of paper, never ''Crayola Fuckin' Model Magic'')
* A [[Chris and fashion|striped shirt]] (brown)
* [[Pedo-Glasses|A pair of rather bulky glasses which would look ridiculous on anybody else.]]
* [[Obesity]] (by means of a stuffed shirt, later removed)
* [[Speech impediment|A distinctive nasal voice]]
* [[Autism]]

All of which, of course, made him almost [[Chris and reality|''indistinguishable'']] from Solid Chris! Solid himself made no comment, probably because he didn't notice the new videos among the chatter of all the other trolling. The alternative — that Solid just ignored them — is far too reasonable to consider.

==Ian Brandon Anderson==
{{main|Ian Brandon Anderson}}

What really cranked this up to eleven was a chain of events that started with Solid Chris getting his "CChanSonichu" channel back: First, Solid posted [[CWC Calls Out Three Naïve YouTubers|a series of videos]] on 10 [[July 2009]] where he "called out" three trolls by their YouTube handles, and dropped their dox (well, dropped "supposed states of residence"). That resulted in the permanent banhammer for "CChanSonichu".

The next piece fell into place when he posted his [[Rollin' and Trollin']] video on his new YouTube account, "[[IBAChandler]]". When it hit [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]], newfags everywhere momentarily lost control of their bowels, thinking they'd been trolled by a grand master. Trolls, however, did what trolls do best: they started riffing on it. Pretty quickly, YouTube comments popped up referring to Solid as "Ian Brandon Anderson". Such was the price of success for Solid's small drop of near win in his sea of epic fail: he had delivered unto his enemies a weapon that they'd use for months.

Even then, the damage control from that episode would have probably kept him from noticing Liquid's videos. Liquid, however, then raised the stakes in an attempt to get Solid's attention.

==The CWCivil War==
===Opening shots===
[[File:LiquidChristine.jpg|thumb|right|It's on!!!]]
[[Image:Honest-and-true.jpg|thumb|right|TRUTH and HONESTY established by the state of [[Virginia]]!]]
:''See Also: [[CChanSonichuCWC Videos, June-July 2009#The CWCivil|Liquid's CWCivil War Videos]]''

The war began on 21 July, when Liquid uploaded a [[CChanSonichuCWC Videos, June-July 2009#Now Selling the OFFICIAL and ORIGINAL SONICHU Merchandise of CWC, NO FAKERIES OR IMPOSTOR|video]] that reeled Solid in hook, line, and sinker, having sold Sonichu merchandise with [[Samantha Thaddeus]] at Otakon. A rebuttal was in order:

{{quotebox|DO NOT BUY from the Impostor, "<nowiki>http://www.youtube.com/user/CChanSonichuCWC CWCCChanSonichuCWC</nowiki>". HE IS CRAPPY, and [[Chris and English|his Nasal Voice]] is JUST DOWNRIGHT AWFUL.

Also, if I wanted to buy PAPER, I'd go to [[Wal-Mart]] and buy 500 FULL 8.5 X 11 Sheets for about 5 dollars!

HIS CHURCH? HE MUST LIVE IN FRICKIN' OHIO with "[[Julie]]"; [[Chris and hypocrisy|NEVER DRIVES GREATER THAN 7 Hours]] JUST TO EVEN VISIT [[Wesley Memorial]] in [[VIRGINIA]].

F*** HIM TO HELL!<ref name="realprotest">[[REAL Protest against the FAKE]]</ref>}}

Solid also took time out from his busy schedule to post threats on Liquid's YouTube comments:

{{quotebox|'''The Final Showdown'''

Hey, DUMBASS! [[Chris and his ego|YOU WISH YOU WERE ME]]! I would say YOU are Stuck... IN MINUS-SECOND-GEAR!

I am Calling YOU OUT!

[[14 Branchland Ct.]] [[Ruckersville]], VA
BEFORE August 2, 2009.
If you really WANT to be me, then Come Face Me.

oh, BTW, YOUR [[Speech impediment|NASAL VOICE]] IS MORE GRATING THAN THE WORD "[[Naive|NAIVE]]", and METAL NAILS ON THE CHALKBOARD.

But "Naive" is even WORSE than NAILS.

You are a Nerd and a Whimp!

Have a good day. 
Christopher Christian Weston Chandler<ref name="realprotest"/>}}

Even at this point, Solid Chris still may have let this all go, as he was simultaneously getting blackmailed by [[Jack Thaddeus]], who was holding his [[PSN]] account to ransom. But as that wound down, Liquid caught Solid's eye again, by picking up on the Ian Brandon Anderson meme:

{{quotebox|Hello, again, Loyal Fans,

It is I again, Christian Weston Chandler. NOT Christopher Christian Weston Chandler as EVERYONE KNOWS I Changed my name FROM Christopher to Christian (PS: That Troll, as Some have now Informed Me, his Real Name is IAN BRANDON ANDERSON). Anyway, I am Working Very Hard on Sonichu 9 and Things may be Progressing Heavily with my new TRUE [[Gal-Pal]] [[Kacey]] and I. Also, Expect more Announcements of this Developing Caliber in the Future.

Stay True.

CWC<ref>[[CChanSonichuCWC_Videos,_June-July_2009#Christian_Weston_Chandler.27s_EXCITING_ANNOUNCEMENT_of_SONICHU_and_Addressing_Things.| Christian Weston Chandler's EXCITING ANNOUNCEMENT of SONICHU and Addressing Things.]]</ref>}}

===The battleground===

===="More Than A Feeling"====
[[Image:CWCvsIanGuitar.jpg|thumb|The REAL Chris is not only cute, he can play the guitar!]]
:''See Also: [[CWC More Than A Feeling]]''
:''See Also: [[CChanSonichuCWC_Videos,_June-July_2009#More_Than_A_Feeling_THE_TRUE_VERSION_by_Christian_Weston_Chandler_.28CWC.29|More Than A Feeling THE TRUE VERSION by Christian Weston Chandler (CWC)]]

For whatever reason, Solid dug up an old video of himself failing at ''Guitar Hero'' and dumped it online. Liquid shot back with a TRUE and HONEST rendition on a real guitar.

====Spanish Challenge====
[[Image:Cestnepas.jpg|thumb|Ceci n'est pas une Chris.]]
:''Main Article: [[CWC Update 29 July 2009]]''

More [[I Am The TRUE, Original CCWC|video rage]] followed before Solid attempted a cunning plan:

{{quote|También. Mi presente. Responde en español bueño. ¿Si no que bueño? Tu no eres el verdad. Tu eres el impostor.|Solid Chris, ''[[CWC Update 29 July 2009]]''}}

The plan backfired when [[CWC Update 29 July 2009#Liquid's_response|Liquid responded more fluently in Spanish, French, German, and Japanese]].

====''SingStar'' Challenge====
[[Image:Tgtdfw4.jpg|thumb|Only one clear choice, choosing the TRUE and HONEST Chris.]]
{{Main|SingStar Challenge}}

{{quote|Alright, Christian, Mr. Brown-Striped Impostor, since you have been able to accept and complete my question challenges, it is time to issue a new challenge.|Solid Chris, [[SingStar Challenge|"''SingStar'' Challenge"]]}}

And then he shaved his goatee off. Dry. With a safety razor.

As expected, the contest went to Liquid, the absolute chad, and Solid, as always, was a sore loser about it. Liquid had a tally of four votes in favor, two against. He then took his leave from the competition, after announcing a number of personal coups:
* That he'd finally found a true sweetheart, [[Kacey]].
* That he'd landed a job as a Production Manager and Game Designer at [[Microsoft]] for a ''Sonichu'' game for all consoles.
* That Dark Horse Comics would be publishing his [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'' comics]], making him even more filthy rich, with the opening of the CWCStore.

And finally, that he had decided to stop battling the Solid, and move out of his parents' house to live in Redmond, Seattle, to continue his happy, successful life.

==="SHOWDOWN"===
{{Main|SHOWDOWN: The TRUE CWC Confronts The FAKE}}

{{Quote|You’re breaking my balls here.|Solid, [[SHOWDOWN|"SHOWDOWN"]]}}

On 9 [[August 2009]], Liquid called Solid up and confronted him over the slanderous lies he was telling on YouTube. Solid tried reason, and when that failed, he threatened to get Liquid arrested for identity theft, dragging Bob into the debacle along the way:

{{quotebox|If you DO NOT COME CLEAN RIGHT NOW, I am going to get my father in on this further, and you are going to get FUCKING ARRESTED, THROWN IN JAIL AND YOU WILL NOT GET TO LIVE THE PEACEFUL, HAPPY LIFE THAT KACEY AND I WOULD LIKE ''YOU'' TO LIVE, BECAUSE KACEY REALLY CARES FOR YOU, ''MAN''!<ref>[[SHOWDOWN|"SHOWDOWN"]]</ref>}}

==="I, Christian Weston Chandler of Ruckersville, Virginia, Have Grown Up."===
On 14 August 2009, Liquid announced that he was departing YouTube for the time being to pursue turning his ''Sonichu'' series into an acclaimed media franchise.
{{Infobox/Liquid
| name = I, Christian Weston Chandler of Ruckersville, Virginia, Have Grown Up.
| video = {{#ev:youtube|1pbi94LLabY}}
| Stardate = 14 August 2009
| Maker = [[Liquid Chris]]
| Subject Matter = {{Music}} Music {{Galpals}} Kacey
| Performance Style = {{Reason}} Reason
| Shirt = [[Image:Brownstripeshirt.png]] Brown
| previous = [[CChanSonichuCWC Videos, August-November 2009#Verdict: I (CWC) WIN the SingStar Contest. Also, More Updates on Sonichu and Going Places :)|Verdict: I (CWC) WIN the ''SingStar'' Contest. Also, More Updates on ''Sonichu'' and Going Places :)]]
| next = [[CChanSonichuCWC Videos, August-November 2009#GONE|GONE]]
}}

Of course, this sent Solid completely over the deep end. First, he raged:

{{quote|STOP THAT IMPOSTOR BASTARD WHO HAS BEEN POSING WITH MY NAME, MY ADDRESS, MY PHONE NUMBER, EVERYTHING! STOP HIM! HE DESERVES NOTHING!|Solid Chris, [[NO D*** WAY, IMPOSTOR!!!|"NO D*** WAY, IMPOSTOR!!!"]]}}

Then, he tried reason:

{{quotebox|The ''Singstar'' Challenge was NEVER to verify who was the real Christian Weston Chandler, because everyone on the [[Internet]] knows that I am, he's the impostor. They should quit encouraging him. And I wish that he would stop his stupid, damn, dirty game. I don't know what the heck is wrong with his head. [''his voice gets higher''] He ain't right. He don't even let me get a word in edgewise. He just keeps going on and on AND ON AND ON AND ON AND ON AND ON AND ONNNNNNNNN! Worse than my father!<ref>[[The Contest NEVER was to Determine Who was Who|"The Contest NEVER was to Determine Who was Who"]]</ref>}}

And as summer disappeared, so too did Liquid Chris: The apparent victim of foul play. Viewer discretion is advised, as the next video is extremely disturbing.

{{Infobox/Liquid
| name = GONE
| video = {{#ev:youtube|5VEt7DgWMNk}}
| Stardate = 15 August 2009
| Maker = [[Liquid Chris]]
| Subject Matter = {{Violence}} [[Death threats]]
| Shirt = [[Image:Brownstripeshirt.png]] Brown
| previous = [[CChanSonichuCWC Videos, August-November 2009#I, Christian Weston Chandler of Ruckersville, Virginia, Have Grown Up.|I, Christian Weston Chandler of Ruckersville, Virginia, Have Grown Up.]]
| next = [[CChanSonichuCWC Videos, August-November 2009#10152009|10152009]]
}}

Chris's sweetheart, [[Kacey]], was distraught over the event and posted a video confirming Chris's disappearance and announcing her withdrawal from their engagement.

==CWCivil War II: Kacey Boogaloo==
[[Image:Megatron_pistol2.jpg|thumb|Chris's solution to Boyfriends.]]
{{Main|Kacey}}

Liquid Chris reappeared on 15 [[October 2009]] with a new video explaining the trials and tribulations of the past few months, and igniting a heated love triangle with Solid for Kacey's affections. According to Liquid, he had been unlawfully detained in a meat-packing factory, and when he managed to escape, he found himself in Africa. With the assistance of a few others, Liquid managed to make his triumphant return to Ruckersville, and the stage was set from there on out.

In the [[Greetings to Kaceys Folks|video]] addressed to Kacey's parents, Solid called him '''"the previous Chris"'''. In a [[11052009 Kacey, I Love You, and I Need You|desperate video for Kacey]], Solid called him '''"the other Chris"''' repeatedly.

When the dust had settled, Solid's behavior had [[Father Call|offended Kacey's father]] and, through his immaturity, pushed Kacey back into the loving TRUE and HONEST arms of the Liquid.

{{Infobox/Liquid
| name = 10152009
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Ni8d6CRSD1o}}
| Stardate = 15 October 2009
| Maker = [[Liquid Chris]]
| Subject Matter = {{Homos}} Homos {{Rumors}} Rumors
| Shirt = [[Image:Brownstripeshirt.png]] Brown
| previous = [[CChanSonichuCWC Videos, August-November 2009#GONE|GONE]]
| next = [[CChanSonichuCWC Videos, August-November 2009#THIS will NOT STAND, you HOMO JERK. FROM: the True C.W.C with Birth Name Christopher.|THIS will NOT STAND, you HOMO JERK. FROM: the True C.W.C with Birth Name Christopher.]]
}}

==Epilogue==
[[File:Liquid and Kacey.jpeg|thumb|250px|<s>Liquid</s> Chris and Kacey, happily married.]]
[[File:Liquid Chris.jpg|thumb|200px|[[TSSSF]] card Chris made of Liquid, eight years after the closing of the saga.]]

Liquid Chris is now married to his beloved sweetheart, [[Kacey]]. As the one TRUE and HONEST creator of Sonichu, his artwork and comics are extremely popular and he often attracts many beautiful [[boyfriend-free girl]]s with his medallions and his [[Gitar of Fail|Guitar of Win]].

After Solid Chris [[The MovingFoward videos|destroyed his PS3]] in an attempt to get a $9000 bounty, [[Surfshack Tito]] would mistakenly give the money to Liquid, under the belief that he was Solid.

Liquid makes mad [[Clyde Cash|cash]] by selling said medallions at Otakon and other [[anime]] [[Anime Mid-Atlantic|conventions]] while voicing Solid in ''[[Sonichu the Animated Series|Sonichu: The Animated Series]]''. He has also made several hundred thousand dollars from his two critically acclaimed games, ''[[Pokémon: Lightning Version]]'' and ''Sonichu: The Crystal Chronicles'' for the [[Nintendo|Nintendo DS]] and [[HEXBox|Xbox 360]], respectively. On 27 July 2011, Liquid bid fond faredieu to the trolling universe on YouTube by closing his account.

Solid Chris then considered Liquid Chris a friend.

After Chris Duckworth abandoned his Liquid Chris persona, he acquired a BS in oncology, and he currently works as a cancer research doctor.<ref>https://www.targetedonc.com/view/tumor-growth-angiogenesis-ovarian-cancer-linked-to-key-adapter-protein</ref> Time will tell if his findings will bring us one step closer to the cure.

While Chris Duckworth has retired from trolling Solid Chris, he recorded a [[parody]] of the theme song to ''{{w|The Cleveland Show}}'' at some point prior to [[November 2015]], when the video was reuploaded. The song was eventually animated as ''[[The Chris-Chan Show]]'' in [[November 2020]], which attracted the attention of Solid.

In the years since, Solid eventually forgot about much of the Liquid Chris saga.<ref>[[Idea Guy Q&A]]</ref> However, in fall [[2019]] Chris created a [[TSSSF]] card of Liquid Chris, showing he still held some animosity towards him – the card describes Liquid as a villain utilizing "pretentious acting". During a [[February 2024]] [[February 2024 livestreams#Part 2|livestream]], Chris [[Chris and reality|refused to believe]] that Liquid Chris was a doctor, and said Liquid was "trapped in his own stupor and mentality and arrogance and everything".

===Farewell to Trolling===
After ending his saga, Liquid wrote a long farewell to trolling, before leaving the 'inner circle' <ref>[[User:Bystander/Liquid's letter]] Note that [[Clyde Cash]] himself edited the page</ref>. Some people think that details such as Liquid trolling Solid for the recognition of [[Wikipedia:Hayden Panettiere|Hayden Panettiere]] and being a conservative are ironic, but former trolls have confirmed that these are both unironic<ref> https://kiwifarms.pl/threads/random-thoughts-questions.49854/page-734</ref>.

{{quote|He originally did it to impress Hayden Panettiere. He was contacted by someone from PVCC (might've been champ, I forgot who). He was a conservative. The rest of the stuff is all legit.
|Former PVCC member 'Hollywood Hulk Hogan'}}

{{collapsible|Farewell to Trolling|It was March of 2009 that I discovered Chris-Chan thanks to an anonymous source. Slowly, at first, and then knowing in horror the full extent; it was like watching an accident happen in slow motion and then all of a sudden the car explodes and the passengers’ burned carcasses are ejected onto a bridge, causing havoc and crashes and ultimately wrecking the bridge. That’s what Chris-Chan was like to my life.

But I still worked diligently and carried on with life as normal, as much as I possibly could, with the disturbing knowledge creeping silently in the back of my mind.

On June 21, 2009, I realized that I had a problem. I had some irrational crush on Hayden Panettiere. It was summer, I was stuck at home, there’d be no hope of going to L.A. and getting some fairy-tale like treatment and ending up together with her and living happily ever after. So I thought. What could I do to express my anguish at possibly never coming in contact with her or gaining her attention? I had to gain her attention. Do something… strange, and epic. Something that would dispel my boredom. I thought of the Chris-Chan impersonation I’d been doing off-and-online Left 4 Dead on Xbox live.

So I went into my guest room and typed up a script containing most of my favorite Chris-Chan lines. It wasn’t that great of a script, and it was a dumb idea. It was also one in the morning, which meant that if I talked louder than usual, my dad’d wake up with supersonic hearing and bust my ass and make me go to sleep. I obtained an awkward-looking brown and tan polo. I turned on the camera and I just let it all out.

About a week later, I saw that the creator of Sonichu: The Animated Series commented on the impression I’d posted. Though, in my mind, it was still more about Hayden Panettiere than getting recognized for a good impersonation. Still, I was quite surprised, to say the least. I quickly responded in kind and then put up another video, this time addressing him. He was impressed and asked me to start voicing Chris-Chan for the Animated Series.

I was honored and flattered that his crew didn’t reject my attempt at being funny. I made friends with the lot of them and then joined their production team, Stretch Douche. We talked quite a bit on Skype. It was the first time in a while I’d really felt involved with an internet community, so I kept it going.

Soon enough, one of the editors of the CWCki, Champthom, contacted me on my Youtube account. He asked if I’d make a specialized video talking about my Sonichu merchandise, since someone had told Chris that someone else was selling them at Otakon. Already knee-deep in the CWC stuff, I couldn’t refuse the offer.

Then, on July 22, Chris-Chan posted a video. Rage that he hadn’t shown since the days of Clyde Cash and Jimmy Hill. And it was all directed… at me. I woke up that morning, signed on Skype, and Spazkid instantly told me all about what happened. I went to check the video and I was stunned. Stunned would be an understatement. I’d realized that Hayden Panettiere was no longer relevant. I’d gotten Chris to respond to me. To me. A random Youtube user. It wasn’t ‘til later that I’d learn the Field Agents were more involved.

I’d applied to PVCC about a month earlier with the nickname “KneelToGeneralZod.” It got lost in the void and I never received a reply. Another Youtuber who described himself as “Bryan Bash” contacted me and offered to get me right into the PVCC. Already I felt like I’d accomplished enough, that this was as good as it was going to get and perhaps I should stop making videos for lord knows what could happen if everyone suddenly stopped playing along.

I went on the PVCC for the first time to find out how big of a deal it was; this was a much larger, active community than I’d ever expected. People who I’d never heard before were hailing my actions as heroic, and blessed them for producing a bounty of beautiful tard-rage. I made my first post, and people knew I was there.

It wasn’t long before I made another video. This time, I doubled down on CWC’s jealousy and showed off the “merch” I’d taken a couple hours to gather together beforehand. It was a hit. Obviously, “the man in the brown striped shirt” was getting to him.

Things were quiet. I enjoyed the Animated Series episodes remade with my own voice with ferocity. Then, I got an invitation from Yoko to join the Mumble chats. I’d heard only vaguely about Mumble, the things I did know were that Chris actually used the program to talk with Clyde Cash, and that it was a sister version of Skype. I followed Yoko’s instructions and fell through the rabbit hole.

It took me a second to realize who I was surrounded by. The only familiar faces were Yoko and Champthom. Everyone else was an enigma, until—near the bottom of the screen, NO, it couldn’t have been. Clyde Cash? The legend himself? I simply remember thinking that if this was indeed Clyde, then everyone else here was important. What had I stumbled upon? What had I gotten myself into? I don’t know any of these guys. I’m just some kid who did a Chris-Chan impersonation. And, yet, here I was in the central of the ‘inner circle,’ the ‘dedicated trolls.’

I couldn’t help but feel humbled. They accepted me as one of their own. I was in shock to meet, never mind befriend some extremely important people that I’d only just read about and admired. Clyde, Bluespike, Ivy, Emily, canine, and many others. Each with their own saga or contribution. This can’t be happening, I thought. But it did. And the story unfolded right before my very eyes. I collaborated with Clyde to make a fake Mumble chat. I tricked some hipsters who wanted to make money off of Chris-Chan. I got my own ED page with nothing but praise, eventually being featured on the front page for an entire day. Keep in mind, this ‘inner circle’ was with me the entire way. I can’t thank them enough.

Now, however, it’s time for me to make my long-overdue au revoir. People don’t know where I’ve been for the last two or three weeks. I haven’t talked to my best friend in three weeks. I’ve tried everything I could to manage my life and not look like a basement dweller. But it’s not who I am. The real me is an ambitious, overly-driven young man studying and working to become an M.D., eventually a surgeon. But I can’t have these dual lives and expect to have time for it all. I have to pick one, and I think it’s pretty clear which road I’m taking.

School for me starts soon. I’ve got time before then to catch up on my studies, but it’s not going to be easy. It is, however, necessary. And I hate to say it but even though I want to be around to find out what goes on behind the scenes after my “saga” is over, I can’t.

It’s been fantastic, invidious, terrifying, and gut-bustingly hilarious. But I’ve got to return to normal life. It’s simply gone on too long for me. And if you think that I’m being way too self-centered here, well, I am. And I’m sorry. But it’s the only way. I feel a certain sadness by leaving you all with no prior acknowledgement. However, it IS the only way. If I can say a few things before I’m gone, I’d like to.

Admins: Please ban my account after I post this message. I can’t be tempted to distraction, and it kills me that I won’t get to say goodbye to anyone individually after this whole ordeal.

PVCC, en generale: You’ve all been awesome to me. More than I deserve. Keep on doing what you’re doing, because you’re doing it right. I hope you’ll keep the spirit of how awesome this was alive.

Mumble: I’m sorry I can’t do as many CWC impersonations for you, whether reading emails, joking around, or tricking people or Chris himself. I do apologize for that. Well, you're cool people. You're the nerdiest fucking people that I've ever met in my life and my friends would disown me if they ever knew I was associating myself with you, but you’re just great.

My ego: I’m sorry that the gigantic boost has to end. But I can only keep a fine balance between humbleness and elitism, and you know that.

Clyde: I’m sorry we never got to debate politics. You seem quite progressive to me, a stark, conservative Republican. We’d have a hell of a time discussing history and policy. And I’ll get those audiobook lines to you, soon.

Gen: Thanks for being such a good sport. Your life is horrible and cursed, and I’m glad I could make it better for at least a bit. Anyone who put me in fan art: Thank you, thank you, thank you. I’m keeping all of it.

It’s hard to talk about all this like tomorrow will be the same. But I’m going now. Maybe you’ll hear about me pioneering some surgical technique or medical research. Maybe you’ll read my column in the paper or hear my radio show. I don’t know what the future holds, but trolling can’t be a part of it anymore, and I’m crushed to admit that.

I didn’t think I’d make nearly as many friends and acquaintances over the summer as I have right here, and on Youtube. It’ll be hard to leave you all like this. I didn’t think I’d make any new friends at all. But you have proven me wrong. I have one final request, for all of you that are reading this or have scrolled to the bottom since it’s tl;dr: Please, if my true identity does get leaked (which it almost certainly will), I ask that you’ll do what you can to keep it under wraps.

Cover for me, if you will. Be vigilant. Believe. And thank you all so very, very much.

Sincerely, CChanSonichuCWC

PS: I JUST WON THE GAME :awesome:}}

==Irony==
[[File:Liquidd.jpg|thumb|left|Solid acts as Liquid, in [[100 2270|"100 2270"]].]]
[[Image:LiquidChrisBelieveInMe.jpg|thumb|BELIEVE.]]

Solid has mocked Liquid on several points:

* [[Speech impediment|His nasal tone.]]
* [[Chris and fashion|His brown striped shirt.]]
* [[Chris and money|Actually making money off ''Sonichu''.]]
* [[Obesity|His appearance.]]

It's a bad sign when one is fighting a mirror, and worse when the mirror is winning, worse still if it is a fun-house mirror made especially to [[parody|mock]] you.

In early August 2009,<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2009]]</ref> Solid began to believe that Liquid couldn't be the real Chris because only the real Christian Weston Chandler is a [[Slow-in-the-minds|retard]] who is the laughing stock of the Internet. Therefore, the fact that Liquid isn't trolled and doesn't do dumb shit suggests that he isn't the real Chris. Of course, previously mentioned theories seem to disprove this assertion.

In a further fit of irony, Solid ended up impersonating Liquid in a bizarre attempt to woo Liquid's girlfriend, [[Kacey]]. Solid also impersonated Liquid, who was impersonating him impersonating...or something...in "[[100 2270]]".

Additionally, regarding the story of ''Metal Gear Solid'', one might initially believe that Liquid Snake (the "clone") inherited all of the "flawed recessive" genes, while Solid Snake (the original) inherited the dominant genes, but in reality, it's the total opposite. Going back to Christory, this ties in with how Liquid Chris is better than Solid Chris in every way.

== In the comic ==
[[Image:TrueAndHonestCWCArt.jpg|The impostor [[Chris]] stole his famous lecture to the [[Jerkops]] from the real Chris.|thumb|left]]
[[Image:Ibachandlercroppedsmaller.jpg|Beel explains Liquid's fate|thumb|top|right]]
[[Image:Furryiba.jpg|thumb|Go, [[IBAChandler]], and copycat-ly [sic] sieze [sic] to the extreme!|left]]
[[Image:Liquids_end.png|The commission as first seen in Ben Saint's lecture|thumb|top|right]]

Despite being one of the most important events in Christory, the Liquid Saga is addressed in only two pages within the entirety of ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]''. On 17 [[November 2009]], Liquid made his very first appearance in Solid' Chris's [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]]. Solid, being the slanderous impostor that he is, had the nerve to claim that Liquid's name was Ian Brandon Anderson, and once again tried (and failed) to convince everyone that he was the TRUE and ORIGINAL creator of the [[Sonichu]] franchise.

Chris planned a future plot where [[Giovanni]] captured [[Rosechu]] and forced [[Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)|Chris]] to cede control over [[CWCville]] to Liquid. This, however, has yet to be done.<ref>[[CWC Blog#20 November 2009]]</ref>

Since Liquid's fate in the comic remained nebulous at best, [[Ben Saint]] commissioned a piece from Solid Chris that explained Liquid's ultimate fate. To the surprise of Saint himself, Chris actually delivered. The piece was revealed in a YouTube lecture by Saint on the timeline of the Sonichu canon<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFOIauPQ5XI&t=4424s Sonichu 101: A CWC Lecture]</ref> and included commentary by [[Beel]], [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]], [[Rosechu]] and Chris himself.

{{quote|So, you want to know the fate of the past impostor of Christian, as the original person was known? Simply put, [[IBAChandler]], he was dragged down to [[14 Branchland Court|hell]], punished of identity theft, and all of his memories and past incarnations reset. His soul was born a fresh blank into a newborn child, and his old body was burned in Hell's lava pool.|[[Beel]] in the commissioned art.}}

However, [[Sonichu 13]] its mentioned that an "Ian Brandon Anderson" was elected as the head police chief of [[CWCville]]. Whether these two were meant to be the same character (thus making the commissioned comic page non-canon) or a totally different person with a similar name was never explained.<ref>[[:File:Sonichu 16 page-13.JPG]]</ref>

==See also==
[[File:Chrischan_cosplay.jpg|thumb|Venom "[[Jail Saga|Punished]]" Chris.]]
* [[Solid Chris]]
* [[Solidus Chris]]
* [[Jimmy Hill]]
* [[Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc]], another doppelganger of Chris featured in the Sonichu comics

{{References}}

== External links ==
* [https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCWx5HnCkR0B0L6oPwjoiWsg The Liquid Archive]
* [https://encyclopediadramatica.online/The_Real_Chris-chan The Real Chris-chan] on the TRUE and HONEST [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]

{{LiquidSaga}}
{{trolls}}
{{people}}

 {{SingStarChallenge}} 
{{DEFAULTSORT:Chris, Liquid}}

[[Category:Trolls]]
[[Category:Miscreants Members]]
[[Category:Liquid Saga]]

Chris and religion

2025-04-21T13:18:16Z

Anemichu: /* Early Life */

{{Articleofthenow}}
{{Dated|[[Jail letters|several jail letters]] and Neo-Spiritual Christianity}}
{{Split Off|Neo Spiritual Christianity}}

{{quote|I believe in God and Jesus too, but God must hate me to put me in the lifestyle I am forced to be cooped up and bored with.|Eli, Eli, Lama Sabachthani?! (Facebook, 2013)}}
{{quote|So, I dare say with all due respect to the Lord: meh.|Chris abandons the Christian God for [[Hyperdimension Neptunia]] goddesses<ref>[[Misc Idea Guy chats#Abandoning Christianity for Hyperdimension Neptunia]]</ref>}}

[[Image:NeptuniagoodbyeJC.png|thumb|[[China|The real reason Chris initially abandoned Christianity.]]]]
[[File:July22LastSupperArt2.jpg|thumb|Chris's version of ''The Last Supper''. He colored Jesus last because "he liked to serve others before serving himself." Note that Judas is [[Chris and race|depicted as the sole]] [[Niggos|niggo]].]]
[[File:Christ chan and god emmanuel at the universe core by nightstarrosechu2891 dg6octc-pre.jpg|thumb|Drawing by Chris of "Christ-chan and God Emmanuel at the Universe Core"]]
'''Religion''' is the belief in and worship of supernatural powers. [[Christian Weston Chandler]]'s '''religious beliefs''' have significantly informed his beliefs and actions. For most of his life, Chris declared himself a Christian, being an attendant of three churches. However, Chris's form of Christianity deviates from other denominations as he incorporates a grab bag of blasphemous mystical beliefs from unrelated traditions and [[Family Guy|other sources]]. He further deviates from Christianity with long held beliefs that he is of unique spiritual importance- having [[Dreams|visions from God]] and [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|magical powers]].

Online, Chris cherrypicked the Bible to reinforce his own beliefs while neglecting doctrine that would have him alter his own conduct. Chris long espoused traditional Christian teachings condemning [[homos]]exuality while ignoring that it also forbids pre-marital [[Chris and sex|sex]], [[Nudes|pornography]] and [[Chris and health|gluttony]]. This dissonance is exemplified in his reaction to the news that [[PandaHalo]] had been raped and impregnated by [[Clyde Cash]]: he actively encouraged her to spend time with her rapist because a child should know and be raised by both of its parents... shortly after encouraging her to get an abortion.<ref>[[IRC (21 January 2009)]]</ref> Chris's [[autism|narrow view of the world]] requires that [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] in the comics, and his [[true and loyal fanbase]] in the [[Chris and reality|real world]], share his religious beliefs- meanwhile, all trolls will [[BURN IN HELL]].

Under the influence of the [[Idea Guys]], Chris abandoned his Christian faith and started following the CPU goddesses from the [[Hyperdimension Neptunia]] video games on 17 [[December 2017]].<ref>[[:File:Sonichu 16 page-34.jpeg|Official renouncement of God]]</ref> As his Hyperdimension Neptunia-fueled delusions spiraled out of control, Chris came to believe that he is the [[Tomgirl Saga|goddess]] [[CPU Blue Heart]], orchestrating the [[Dimensional Merge|apocalypse]] which will create a [[Dimensions#1C-211987|heavenly new world]]. Having taken time to read the bible in jail after his arrest for [[Affair with Mother|incest with his mother]], Chris believes he is the [[Jail Letter - 19 September 2021|reincarnation of Jesus Christ]] (on top of everything else). His resulting religion, '''Neo Spiritual Christianity''', is an unholy amalgam of authentic religious traditions (Christian and otherwise), troll forgeries and narcissism, mixed together with neither forethought nor consistency. He has demanded that watchers worship him, and believes it feasible that he could convince half of the world population to join his personality cult.{{refn|group="note"|For comparison, Christianity, the world's largest religion, made up only 31% of the world population at the time.<ref>[https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2017/04/05/christians-remain-worlds-largest-religious-group-but-they-are-declining-in-europe/ Christians remain world’s largest religious group, but they are declining in Europe]</ref>}}

==Early Life==
As a Christian man himself, [[Bob Chandler]] initially desired to name his son Christian, but "was chicken."<ref>[[It took a talking bear to give the name a young boy loves]]</ref> Chris's name change from Christopher to Christian at the age of ten came from what may well have been divine intervention in the form of [[Leonard Bearstein]], who mistook a Christopher as Christian, and in turn the young boy adopted his bear-given name. Chris has since referred to Leonard Bearstein in the same sentence as God Himself,<ref>[[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!]]</ref> and his arguably spiritual interaction with and belief in the bear was the beginning of many unorthodox ideologies.

==Chris and Christianity==
{{quote|And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a reprobate mind, to do those things which are not convenient; Being filled with all [[Jacob Sockness|unrighteousness]], [[BlueSpike|fornication]], [[Twin Falling Towers|wickedness]], [[Kacey|covetousness]], [[Don't Mess With Me|maliciousness]]; full of [[Infinitely high boyfriend factor|envy]], [[Death threats|murder]], [[Mass debating|debate]], [[List of Chris's lies|deceit]], [[Chris and anger|malignity]]; whisperers, [[Autism Tutorial Extra|backbiters]], haters of God, [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)|despiteful]], [[Chris and his ego|proud]], [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|boasters]], inventors of [[Sonichu|evil things]], [[Bob Chandler|disobedient to parents]], [[Naïve|without understanding]], [[Etsy|covenantbreakers]], [[Hanky-panky|without natural affection]], [[Chris and remorse|implacable]], [[Sonichu Special 4|unmerciful]]: who knowing the judgment of God, that they which [[For Julie's Eyes Only|commit such things are worthy of death]], not only do the same, but have pleasure in them that do them.|Romans 1:28-32, on Chris}}

[[Image:CHRISjesuss.jpg|thumb|right|150px|Program from Chris's baptism.]]

===Church Attendance===
{{See also|Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church}}

The first church Chris is known to have attended is Korean Canaan Presbyterian Church in [[Richmond|Chesterfield County]], which he attended as a teenager in the '90s.<ref>[[Church Visit#00:18:10 - Seth MacFarlane & The Bible]]; [[Date with Emily#Eating spaghetti and conversing (0:36:49–0:44:46)]]</ref> Chris would later attend [[Grace Baptist Church]], a small {{w|Southern Baptist}} congregation in [[Charlottesville]] that launched in July [[2000]].<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20071215133152/http://cvilletomorrow.typepad.com/charlottesville_tomorrow_/2007/12/grace_baptist.html Grace Baptist Church asks for more time to prepare request]</ref> In [[2008]] he was, under [[Nudes|mysterious circumstances]], forced to leave that community, at which point he and Bob began attending [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church]]. Although Chris and Bob identified as Methodists as of [[2009]], Barbara continued to identify as a Presbyterian.<ref name=regina>[[Regina e-mails#Chris rambles like a motherfucker]]</ref> In spite of this, Bob and Barbara were married in a Baptist church, suggesting that they were never very particular about the differences between Protestant denominations.

"Wesley Mem" is located near the [[University of Virginia]] and has an unusually liberal theology; the common conclusion among [[trolls]] is that congregations more in line with Chris's intolerance of [[homos]] were equally intolerant of ''him'', so he had to come there. The doctrinal differences between the Baptist, Methodist and Presbyterian denominations were probably too subtle for Chris to concern himself with, and he likely did not spiritually identify with any particular denomination of Christianity beyond simply being Protestant, or even just Christian (as suggested by his statement that Methodism and Presbyterianism "are both of Christian Religions").<ref name=regina/>

===Earlier notions of God===
[[Image:CWCletter.jpg|thumb|left|Chris invokes God and Jesus, saying they told him that [[Blanca Weiss|Blanca]] is real. Proof that God and Jesus are on the [[trolls]]' side.]]
[[Image:SchuComic10P09.jpg|thumb|right|God and Jesus ('sup?) tell Chris he is meant to be with [[Ivy]].]]

Traditionally, Chris had a fundamental belief in an omnipotent, benevolent male God. He also accepted Jesus Christ as the son of God and the savior of mankind. He was reluctant to mention God without also including Jesus, perhaps out of some sense that he must stress his specifically Christian notion of God (despite other Abrahamic sects using completely different words for Him). In effect, Chris frequently referred to "God and Jesus" (or "GodJesus"<ref>[[Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions]]</ref><ref>[[CWC Update 9 April 2009]]</ref>) as if they were some sort of {{w|Binitarianism|Binity}}, a deviation from the mainstream Christian concept of the {{w|Trinity}} ("The Father, The Son, and the Holy Spirit") that his churches would regard as heretical.

Chris believes God has a special interest in his own life, which would be consistent with Western monotheism - except Chris seemed to view God as a more of an instrument of his own will than a supreme being to Whom he is subject. In Chris's view of God, the Almighty will overlook his misdeeds, but will punish any who malign Chris. Case in point, the ''fact'' that Chris cheated in the [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|''PaRappa the Rapper'' contest]] is not nearly as important as the ''suspicion'' that [[Adam Stackhouse]] did, and Chris invoked God numerous times in his threats to Adam. Adam is no exception - Chris has been commonly observed invoking the wrath of God in his [[Death threats|infantile threats]]. Along with punishing all trolls, Chris expects God to hand him a sweetheart on a silver platter<ref>[[Vanessa AIM Chat 3]] message at 2:22:22 AM</ref> but is oblivious to the fact that God has yet to back him up on any prayers.

Much like the {{w|Ruhollah Khomeini|Ayatollah Khomeini}}, Chris attributes most of his impetus to commands given to him directly from GodJesus in [[Dreams|visions]]. “I'd say my spirit is active while I am awake, but it does more when I am at rest or sleeping,” he wrote in 2014.<ref name=lvlup>[[List of OkCupid Answers#2014 Answers--LevelUpKing]]</ref> His exact beliefs concerning these prophetic dreams are difficult to pin down, but the most rational interpretation is that Chris dreams about something he'd like to do, then wakes up and decides it was God telling him to do it. In Chris's mind, each vision is simultaneously a directive to do something and proof that it will happen no matter what occurs. For instance, after Chris had a vision about fathering a [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|daughter]], he decided he was required to actively [[Love Quest|make that happen]] while also assuring himself that [[Virgin with rage|failure]] was impossible. When Chris was being accused of [[Chris and race|racism]] for insisting that he can only date white women, he justified this by arguing that his prophesied daughter must be white.

Visions from God supposedly confirmed that [[Blanca Weiss]], then [[PandaHalo]] and finally [[Ivy]] were to be the mother of [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Chris's child]], despite the fact that each of these women subsequently turned out to be [[trolls]]. This proves that God, if He exists, is either not responsible for Chris's supposedly prophetic dreams, or is [[Kick the Autistic|having a laugh at his expense]], an idea which Chris may have later taken to heart.

===Afterlife===
{{Quote|For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.|Ephesians 2:8-10, on the place of good deeds in the Christian faith.}}
{{Quote|Like most people; our souls leave our bodies, we end up in Heaven or Hell depending on our deeds/misdeeds, and possibly Reincarnation.|Chris.<ref>[[Mailbag 30#Questions]]</ref>}} {{clear}}

While the idea of good deeds causing someone to go to Heaven and bad deeds sending them to Hell is a common one, most Protestant theology explicitly states that the salvation of one's soul is based completely on one's faith. Defying this, Chris has stated that one goes to Heaven or Hell based completely on personal actions. He thinks that he will go to heaven because he's done "[[Common Questions#1 January 2010|a lot of]] [[28 October 2011|good deeds]]". Likewise, he feels that [[homos]] are almost certainly bound to go to Hell, and need to become heterosexuals to "[[Mailbag 18#In which Chris believes he has magic powers (srsly)|better their chances of going to Heaven]]". He has also stated numerous times that he feels [[Clyde Cash|various]] [[Jack Thaddeus|trolls]] are bound for Hell for making fun of people over the Internet. He has suggested that they [[To Clyde and Jack|commit suicide]] so that they might receive their eternal punishment faster. In [[Common Questions#09 January 2010|Common Questions 9 Jan 2010]], [[Thorg]] questioned Chris for threatening damnation against his Internet adversaries:

{{quotebox|"You often attempt to scare your [[trolls]] by stating they will go to hell. Some of your trolls do not believe in hell, what do you have to say to them?"}}

To which Chris responded:

{{quote|Firstly, it is NOT a "scare tactic", [[Chris and reality|IT IS FACT]]. And second, I say "Well, Believe it or not. You are Not Dead Yet".}}

Further complicating Chris's ideas of the afterlife, he believes in ghosts, going so far as to claim that he might have seen one.<ref name=lvlup/>

In 2013, Chris commented that he had considered suicide, but "The only reasons I don't do it are my mother and my dogs, and that premature death leaves one in Limbo."<ref>[[October 2013 Facebook Posts]]</ref> In reality, {{w|Limbo}} is, in some Roman Catholic views, a state that unbaptised infants were supposed to enter into when they died: happy, but excluded from God due to their original sin. {{w|Religious views on suicide|Christian views on suicide}} and the fate of suicides in the afterlife is highly varied. His belief that suicide leads one to Limbo may stem from the ''[[South Park]]'' episode "{{w|Death (South Park)|Death}}", in which it is found that the grandfather of a minor character is spending eternity in limbo for having his grandson euthanize him.

In the eulogy Chris made for [[Patti Chandler|Patti]], he wrote that "[Patti] has departed from our world here on earth to a doggy heaven [...] she will run free and play with all the other dogs who are already having fun up [in doggy heaven]."<ref>[[Chris emails 2004-2006#September 2006]]</ref> This suggests that Chris believes that animals (or at least dogs) have an afterlife.

===Sin===
{{quote|But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you...|Jesus Christ, Matthew 5:44}}
{{quote|I PRAY TO GOD AND JESUS TO [[Death threats|KILL]] [[Jason Kendrick Howell|JASON KENDRICK HOWELL]]|Chris, [[Sonichu Girls]] Forum}}
{{quote|HAVE A GOD DAMN HEART ATTACK RIGHT NOW, THIS VERY MOMENT YOU READ THIS MESSAGE, YOU GOD DAMN BITCHING WHORE!|E-mail from Chris to [[Vivian Gee|Vivian]]}}

[[File:John Asperchu.JPG|thumb|right|200px|Take note, Chris.]]

Chris's understanding of Christian theology is extremely limited, and he does not seem to know anything about the Bible (although he apparently owns a copy of the New International Version). His hatred of the homos had nothing to do with the prohibition of sodomy in the Old Testament, which he was unaware of until he heard about it from ''[[Family Guy]]''. His [[Semen#Fapcup|aversion to "spilling his seed"]] and his [[Semen#Recycling|dedication to the unborn]] have absolutely no basis in Biblical passages condemning sexual immorality and abortion. Other than vehemently opposing [[homos]], [[trolls]] and [[jerkop]]s, Chris seems to have little notion about the nature of sin and evil except that people who do things he doesn't like should go to Hell. This is completely at odds with the part of Christian philosophy that states all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God, and anyone who repents his sins will be redeemed.

Chris believed that if he confesses his sins to GodJesus he will be forgiven. Private confessions directly to God are not uncommon in Protestantism, but generally it's assumed that the confessor is doing so out of true [[Chris and remorse|remorse]] and genuinely to atone for mistakes. However, Chris abuses the purpose of confession so that he can commit whatever wrongs he wants and then wipe the slate clean with his "confession." For example, Chris made [[To Clyde and Jack|a video]] in which he suggested that [[Clyde Cash]] and [[Jack Thaddeus]] commit suicide so that they can burn in Hell forever. He later drew them [[Sonichu 10|doing just that]] in [[Sonichu (comic)|his comic]]. Just one day after the comic appearance, Chris answered a fan letter asking why he had been wishing suicide upon them, and pointing out that such a wish conflicts with his Christian beliefs. Chris responded that he had "confessed of that to God and Jesus, and they[sic] have forgiven [him] on that."<ref>[[Mailbag 33#Chris demanded suicide under "reasonable hatred"]]</ref> One of two things happened: either Chris wished for their deaths in the video, asked for forgiveness, then gleefully drew it happening afterward anyway, or he waited until he'd finally got done saying his piece, then conveniently offered up his confession right after getting everything out of his system. Either way, such a confession is highly disingenuous.

When Chris gave in to temptation and cybered with [[Vanessa Hudgens]] in violation of his monogamous relationship with [[Ivy]], Chris made [[Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions|a big production]] out of confessing his sin and seeking forgiveness. This suggests that he previously had little to no experience with the idea of repenting sins before God.

Chris clearly does not follow the Christian concept of the seven deadly sins, as he commits [[death threats|wrath]], [[Liquid Chris|envy]], [[obesity|gluttony]], [[monthly tugboat|sloth]], [[Chris and money|greed]], [[Chris and sex|lust]] and [[Chris and his ego|pride]] constantly.

===Forgiveness===
[[Image:SonichuRosechuReligious.jpg|thumb|right|Sonichu and Rosechu recall Joseph's story of forgiveness immediately prior to Rosechu brutally injuring and sexually assaulting [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] in vengeance for [[Pickle|comparatively innocuous actions]].]]

A major tenet in most any religion you can think of is the act of forgiveness. Unfortunately for Chris, he has [[Autism|no idea of what forgiveness really is]], and will often hold grudges against [[Clyde Cash|anybody]] [[Michael Snyder|he]] feels has wronged him, [[Greene County Conspiracy|sometimes even for years]]. While some may argue that he did show [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha Retraction|forgiveness]] in a few of his videos, even more will argue that such things were done either under an [[China|ulterior motive]] or is meaningless as he goes on to curse and scream at them later on.

[[This is how the Trial went|During Chris's court hearing]] on 10 July 2012, it was discovered that Michael Snyder made an honorable plea that Chris be shown leniency, as a felony was a life-changing event that could really harm Chris in the long run. This comes despite Chris [[The GAMe PLACe#Chris's Attitude at the GAMe PLACe|scaring his customers away]], ''(while he was still allowed in the store)'', [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean#Video|shouting racist slurs at him]], [[Autism Tutorial Part 3|threatening to set fire to his business]], and [[28 October 2011|injuring him with his car]]. This was probably the most extraordinary form of forgiveness that anyone has ever shown towards Chris, even after the latter's horrible actions. Chris's show of gratitude was to go against all common sense and commit ''public slander'' in a court of law:

{{quote|I don't think that [[Michael Snyder|thieving liar]] deserves a [[Monthly tugboat|red cent]]!|Chris<ref>[[This is how the Trial went]]</ref>}}

However, Chris has on occasion shown some capacity to genuinely forgive and move on, as shown at [[MAGfest]] where he was seen making up with [[Adam Stackhouse]] (albeit after 11 years). Such forgiveness has not been extended to the [[jerkops]], however.

===Apostasy===
Apostasy by definition is the abandonment or renunciation of a religious or political belief. For years before the [[Idea Guys]] seized the opportunity to infuse patent absurdities into Chris's mind, Chris appeared to have become somewhat disenchanted with God. Traditional theology has long dealt with the ''problem of evil'' in books Chris is unlikely to read any time soon. Despite Chris's strong belief that GodJesus was backing him up on his [[Love Quest]], God has nevertheless imparted upon him such [[stress]] and trolling. He seemed to believe that the way prayer should work is the same way a little kid learns to get what they want: by saying "please." To Chris, prayer was apparently like ordering a pizza: as long as you pray for something, it'll show up for you exactly how you ordered it. Since Chris hasn't gotten exactly what he has prayed for, the fault must lie with God. In a farewell [[Other documents#Epistle to the Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|letter]] meant for his fellow parishioners at Wesley Memorial, he wrote that "God sees fit for some (hate-filled) reason to continue to curse me as a jinx."

On 7 September 2013, Chris cursed God's name on [[Facebook]] after a run in with a [[Jerkop]]:

{{quotebox|1=
God is giving me the Middle Finger yet again! I backed up and scratched a car in El Agave Lot! And she's a damn Smoker! Now the damn Jerkop is giving me a hard time, because I am screaming up at Freaking Emanuel God! I want God to just kill me Now if he is going to keep giving me middle fingers and a damned difficult life!!!}}

He explained the reasons for his disillusionment in a [[May 2013]] letter to [[Kim Wilson|Kim]]:

{{quotebox|1=
Hey, Kim. I have just read over some of the webpage Phil relayed to me. I must admit, and Amy is welcome to read this as well, it took me by surprise seeing the words "Magick" and "Pagan" in this religion(?).

I like magic(k). I have fully accepted Jesus as my savior. And my mother, father, and what I've hear on television, all have informed me about heaven, hell, that the best way to live is as one does without much regret or with moderate acceptance and happiness. And that "God" is within all of us, as energy and direction. And in the end, we all believe in the same God(ess). Yet also, if God is supposed to love us all, why does he let me continue to have a Lot of downs in my life? I often feel temptation towards destroying the Lego Minifigure I have made in an image of God, or otherwise just torturing it. I admit, I am not perfect.

But I prattle or digress.

So, all things considered, Amy, I will be most willing to try your way on, and see how I feel fully about it after. The way I figure it, at least I can still go to my church regardless. :)}}

Soon thereafter, inspired by ''[[Futurama]]'', he seemed to divorce himself from a Christian conception of God altogether, choosing to believe in a rather capricious, relativistic deity:

{{quote|The Higher Force above us is Always Messing with each of our individual minds every day, rather each of you call him God, Emanuelle, Zeus, Buudah, or even the individual Destiny of your own. I am Not an Atheist, because I Sincerely Believe in the Higher Force of Above Us, even Jesus may be the Higher Force's Son. But every religion will have you believing in the One Same Higher Force. Right Or Wrong, It is truly set up to each Individual Perception of Every Individual Soul among us the Billions of People on this Big Blue Marble among Marbles in the Universe.|Chris on Facebook, August 2014.<ref>[[August 2014 Facebook Posts#tl;dr]]</ref>}}
{{clear}}

==Mysticism and sorcery==
{{main|Magical thinking}}

As early as [[2003]], Chris has invoked curses against his enemies: most famous is the [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]], borrowed from ''[[Dragon Ball|Dragon Ball Z]]'', which he had employed against [[Mary Lee Walsh]]. His magical thinking has been directed in various ways, as when he thought he could shift his [[obesity|body fat]] about by watching [[Subliminal Frequency Hypnosis|hypnotic internet videos]]. In recent years, he has embraced several occult teachings and practices from the [https://encyclopedia2.thefreedictionary.com/New+Age New Age] movement: out-of-body experiences, chakras and special powers associated with [[Magic stones|crystals]], among others. Chris's willingness to embrace magical thinking made him susceptible to manipulation from trolls, climaxing in a strong reality disassociation from brainwashing at the hands of the Idea Guys.

==Delusions of Godhood==
{{see also|Messiah complex}}

{{quote|Fear not. For behold I bring tidings of great joy.|Sonichu, [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]]}}
{{quote|I prayed for forgiveness from the real Christian. Sonichu, will he forgive me?|Aspie Sonichu, [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]]}}
[[Image:Issue 10 Pg 48.jpg|thumb|Sonichu cracks open his tomb and descends in a beam of light.]]
[[File:EmperorChris.png|thumb|left|All hail Christian Weston Chandler, God-<s>Emperor</s> Mayor of [[CWCville]].]]

Beyond his [[Chris and his ego|self-infatuation]] visible from any of Chris's creative output, Chris had shown from an early period the nascent belief that he might have been specially chosen. Chris might have developed a God complex as early as [[2000]], as the halo floating over his head on the cover of ''[[Christian's Favorite Hits!]]'' seems to indicate. In his e-mails to [[Reggie Fils-Aimé]] he seems to call himself Jesus: ''"You have my word as an Avid Gamer, Lamb of God, and Humble Human Being that I WILL work Very Hard to Save, Save, Save."''<ref>[[Reggie Fils-Aimé]]</ref> However, this could also be a [[Chris and English|malapropism]] for "Word of God." More definite signs first emerged in late [[2009]], and have accreted over the decade since into Chris's current apotheosis.

Starting on page 42 of [[Sonichu 10|issue #10]], Chris displays a somewhat disturbing twist to the plot (such as it is) of his comics. [[Ultra Sonichu]] frees [[Zelina Rosechu]] from her stony state using his Chaotic powers, then appears to [[Darkbind Sonichu]] with a message similar in tone, if not outright text, to prophecies of the coming of Jesus Christ (complete with arms outstretched as if he were suspended on a crucifix).

Later on in the issue, Ultra Sonichu travels to the world of [[Asperchu]], where the characters of that comic inform him that they were forced into their roles by Alec, and that they had been praying to Christian Weston Chandler for deliverance and forgiveness. Lo and behold, Chris did send the Messiah Sonichu to end their suffering. Sonichu uses the "Chaotic Remedy" to miraculously cure them all of their [[Asperger syndrome]] (even though only Asperchu himself had the condition) and gives them new names and new, "better" looks.

It should be noted that, like Jesus Christ, [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] was born to a [[virgin with rage|virgin]].

Even before this, Chris had directly compared himself to God. In Issue #7, after Christian is lost in the Time Void, [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_7/Page_32 Sonichu says this].

{{quote|In the meantime, he will receive the [[Chris and English|accumilitive]] memories of the passing moments, so in a way, he is looking down on us, like our Lord and God are able to, but the vision may be blurred.|[[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]], [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]}}

Possibly in response to criticism about acting as God, in [https://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_10/Page_61 later pages] Chris addressed the issue of the non-canon Chaotic Combo worshipping him in an incredibly ignorant manner. First, he declares that he is not God but "a servant of him and Jesus", and immediately after goes on to "forgive" Michael (the copycat Sonichu's made-over name) for "baring false witness against <nowiki>[Chris]</nowiki>", as if he has the authority to forgive the breaking of the Ten Commandments, ''like he's God or something.'' In addition, only five pages later [[Angelica]] condemns those who prefer [[Asperchu|Alec]]'s artwork over Chris's as "blasphemous".<ref>[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=File:SchuComic10P66.jpg Issue 10, page 66]</ref>

Further evidence of Chris's blossoming God complex comes through his answer to some of the frequently asked questions that were put to him via the [[Mailbag]], where he states that he considers Sonichu to have over one billion fans.<ref>[[Common Questions]]</ref> The only other character who can claim such a number is GodJesus (or AllahMuhammad). This mad mentality is compounded by the fact that Chris is like a God to Sonichu; this means that his opinion of himself is that of a God's God. Or maybe a [[Christopher's name change|God's bear]]. Chris moves in mysterious ways.
[[File:Chrisified.jpg|thumb|left|300px|''Except I shall see in his hands the print of the nails, and put my finger into the print of the nails, and thrust my hand into his side, I will not believe.'']]
Chris's God complex has peaked with him [[Chris's Letter to Null|believing he is the reincarnation of Jesus Christ.]] Why God would ever decide that His son should return in the form of a fat manchild we will never know.

{{quote|as a Goddess Mysef[sic], I am unable to worship in churches|Chris, June 2019<ref>[[June 2019 social media posts#Chris says, according to Jesus, dimensional merge will be finished soon]]</ref>}}

It was under the [[Idea Guys]]'s manipulation that Chris's gathering apotheosis came to a head. [[File:Sonichu 16 page-4.JPG|thumb|200px|Chris depicting how he came to share his body with a video game goddess.]]

In November 2017, Chris became obsessed with ''[[Hyperdimension Neptunia]]'', a video game/anime series. He declared a belief in body-sharing with a goddess character (who represents the Sega Dreamcast in the series) by consulting with [[Magi-Chan]], then [[Chris and money|leaving his Dreamcast console powered on for 24 hours]] in order to focus his own psychic power onto it and pull the goddess into his body. Since then, Chris has come to believe that he's actually a goddess to the Sonichu universe, leading to the creation of the Devotees of Chris Chan Sonichu.

{{quote|The Qur’an is to the Bible as Family Guy is to the Simpsons.|Chris,16 November 2021<ref>[[Jail Letter - 16 November 2021]]</ref>}}

Following the revelation of Chris [[Affair with Mother|engaging in incest with his mother]], he was [[Jail Saga|arrested]] and kept in jail for a year and a half, with his only way of communicating with the outside world being via [[Jail Communications|letters]]. Upon booking, Chris was given a Bible and eventually allowed to purchase various other supplies from the commissary using fan donations. Among other items, these included two Turkish prayer rugs which Chris used for warmth and for playing Solitaire on. [[Jail Letter - 25 October 2021 (Kengle)|Kengle]] attempted to send him a Quran in an attempt to convert Chris to Islam, but it was rejected by the jail and Chris bought one from the commissary. He described it as "literally all over the place" and stated that Muslims are indirectly praying to Barb, as Allah was formed from a piece of her.

Despite being stuck alone in a jail cell, Chris claimed to meditate 24/7/365+1 and have full access to the Akashic Records and that he can see into the past and future. He is able to visit alternate dimensions where all his cartoon characters live and he is accompanied by Magi-chan and Mewtwo, among others. Chris has documented his time in jail in his [[Jail Communications#Goddess Log|Goddess log]]. It contains insights from the Akashic Guardian but also a list of names and addresses of everyone who has written to him. Chris said he planned to release this after the Dimensional Merge,<ref>[[Jail Letter - 8 November 2021 (Stories from the Penitentiary)]]</ref> but due to potentially [[Dox|doxxing]] a number of people, names and addresses have been censored in the excerpts released after he was released from jail.

[[File:11.8.21MailFantafront.jpeg|thumb|left|Holy Label sent to a Youtuber, bearing the NSC symbol.]]

From his jail cell, Chris passed judgement on various people from his life and decides whether they have passed their Divine Test. Kengle passed. [[Bella]] definitely failed by making the [[Incest call]] public. [[Dillin Thomas]] failed by confirming that Chris had said that he had sex with his mom. [[Null]] failed and is Chris's version of Judas. Chris feels betrayed by Null because Null tattled on him for breaking his EPO by stealing $750 from Barb, which Chris claims to have paid back. Ironically, Null is now selling [[Null#Allies again|silver coins]] bearing Chris's likeness.

[[File:Christ_chan.jpg|thumb|250px|An artist's interpretation.]]

Chris produced [[Jail Letter Gifts|various "holy items" made out of trash]], which he mailed to people who write him respectful letters. One is a Neo Spiritual Christianity token, of uncertain purpose, made from the bottom of a styrofoam cup. In other letters, he has included blessed bottle labels from [[Fanta]] and [[Coca-Cola]] bottles. These bear Chris's very long signature and his NSC logo, which is composed of a [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Power_symbol standby symbol], combined with a Christian cross, a blue heart, and Sonichu's lightning bolts. The recipients are told to laminate these labels and wrap them around 20oz bottles for use with water and non-alcoholic beverages. They may laminate photocopies of their label for their spouse and children.

Some of Chris's letters have included [[Jail Letter - 6 December 2021|apocalyptic prophecies]], some of which he says are already happening. Neurotypical individuals will suddenly speak multiple languages, including ancient ones, and shall download into their brains massive amounts of knowledge from the Akashic Records. Their brains will overload and burn with fatigue, and they will appear to be schizophrenic. If you encounter one of these individuals, you should not interrupt them. Animals will speak, and humanoid animals will appear. For the record, apocalyptic prophecies [https://abhota.info/end5.htm usually are not accurate.]

After his release from jail, Chris still maintained belief in being Jesus. In [[May 2023]], he signed a receipt "J. Christ Chan Sonichu" for a cashier at the Earthbound Trading Company.<ref>[[:File:CWC signature 5-27-23.png]]</ref> In [[August 2023]], he changed his [[PlayStation]] profile description to read "I'm Christ Chan Prime".<ref>[[:File:PSN profile change 12 August 2023.png ‎]]</ref> In the videos and livestreams he's made since moving to a [[Big Island|new house]], he has consistently referred to himself as "Jesus Christ Chan Sonichu Prime".

{{clear}}

==Devotees of Chris Chan Sonichu==
[[File:The Devotees of Chris Chan Sonichu (DoCCS).jpg|thumb|TSSSF card dedicated to his loyal devotees.]]

Chris had some divine revelations, which he shared on 2 November 2019 in a series of tweets, these revelations are as follows<ref name="divinerev">[[November 2019 social media posts#Devotees of Chris Chan Sonichu|Devotees of Chris Chan Sonichu]]</ref>:

*He is the godess of the Sonichu/Rosechu species, and is of a higher deity level than a CPU.
*His powers are more apparent and potent in C-197, but do exist in 1218.
*The terms "CWCans" and "CWCanism" does not feel or sound fitting for his religion.
*FoCCS and FoCWCS do not sound appealing, either.
*Devotees of Chris Chan Sonichu (DoCCS) is chosen. Pronounced [[dox]], like Chris's favorite pasttime.

And thus, Chris's [[true and honest]] religion, DoCCS, was born.

The DoCCS all share [[kindness]] and [[Vanessa AIM Chat 2|loyalty]], which is a defining figure of a devotee. They also pray to Chris, and channel energy to him so that he can use his godess powers. <s>Chris</s> [[Spirit possession#Sonichu|Sonichu]] has noted that it's far easier for <s>him</s> Chris to answer prayer in C-197, due to his additional power that he has access to in his Chris Chan Sonichu body.<ref>[[April 2020 social media posts#Chris body swaps with Sonichu to cope with missing BABScon|Mentioned here]], Sonichu says: "She is Now, literally, in the position to fully and actively take and answer your Prayers, as the Goddess that she is."</ref>

Chris can also store this energy in [[magic stones]], and often wears these around his neck with the Sonichu medallion.<ref>Sightings [[Analysis Anarchy Reaction Livestreams#TF2 Analysis Anarchy Red Vs Blue Part 2 Reaction Video|here]] and [[:File:July 2020 jewels.jpeg|here]], and many more.</ref> Chris used one of these stones to demonstrate his power, even in 1218, by [[PsychicPowers#Amethyst stone|dropping it with as little movement as possible]], which, when scaled up to C-197 proportions would equate to miraculous healing. Chris thinks that the crystals contain healing power and that they can make you happy.<ref>[[August 2019 social media posts#Chris is all in on Healing Crystals|Twitter reply about healing crystals]]</ref>

===The First holy temple of DoCCS===
[[File:14bc June 2019.jpg|thumb|The illustrious temple of the Devotees of Chris Chan Sonichu]]

In late 2019, the First holy temple of DoCCS was consecrated.<ref>[[:File:14 Branchland Court TSSSF card.jpeg|Temple's TSSSF card]]</ref> The temple has been a central in-between in traversing between this dimension (1218) and it's sister dimension (C-197). The whole property, including the gazebo and sheds have travelled back and forth from 1218 to C-197 many times. Unlike most temples, almost no DoCCS congregate there to worship, and instead the temple acts as private residence to their deity, Chris.

Upon reaching level 40 in Pokemon GO, Chris was able to put the temple forward for an additional consecration ceremony from Niantic (the creators of Pokemon GO) to become the truest and honestest PokeStop of them all, which he did on 20 August 2020. However, despite numerous efforts<ref>[[August 2020 social media posts#Sonichu levels up.21|First mention of the nomination.]]</ref><ref>[[August 2020 social media posts#CWCSonichu Temple is nominated|Further encouragement to aid the cause.]]</ref> to rally his devotees to help the nomination be accepted, his nomination was eventually denied.<ref>[[:File:PokeStop rejected.png|Nomination rejected.]]</ref>

The gazebo on the property contains magic power, and using deity level powers can be used as a vessel for a portal between the dimensions, and can transport items and even living things.<ref name="gazebo">[[:File:CWCs Temples Gazebo TSSSF.jpg|Information on this card]]</ref> Interestingly, in the TSSSF game, its card is a "Unicorn" card and can be in a relationship with Pony OCs,<ref name="gazebo"></ref> though this is probably due to Chris using the card game wrong, rather than him regarding his gazebo as a unicorn.

{{clear}}

==Doctrines of the Devotees of Chris Chan Sonichu==
[[File:BarneySatanism.jpeg|thumb|Chris addresses a theological dispute.]]

Chris's convictions (not [[Chris and the law|that kind]]) are a confused tangle, ever shifting as [[weens]] twist his malleable perception of reality and his mental state continues to deteriorate. The below seeks to describe Chris's contemporary beliefs as accurately as possible, though information is subject to change in light of new revelations at at any time. Chris has hesitated to describe his beliefs as a religion. On 13 [[April 2018]], Chris claimed in a Twitter post that he no longer follows a religion, yet he is neither "atheist" nor "satanist", and over a year later would describe what follows as "a belief and faith system, not a religion".<ref>[[Believe in the OCs and Deities!]]</ref>

===Uzume Possession===
Initially, sharing his body with a clone of the CPU Goddess Uzume Tennouboshi was critical to Chris's newfound religion. Naming the clone that resided within his body as "Orange Spiral Seal", Chris believed that he had "the powers of the four main Goddesses, as well as [his] own powers." In a way, this was a bizarre continuation of his classic [[Love Quest]]. Not only did he believe that he could create a new CPU Goddess From The Ground-Up, but that, with the CPU, he will bring [[Crystal]] into reality and create her as a CPU Goddess, saying that is something that GodJesus would never grant to him. Chris's religion has little in the way of ethics, but he [[August 2019 social media posts#No Pizza Time for Chris|has indicated]] that he believes in the Hindu concept of ''karma'', administered by himself, as an instrument of his vengeance against the [[jerkops]] who tormented him in years past.

===CPU Blue Heart===
{{main|CPU Blue Heart}}

On 16 June 2018,<ref name="CPUBHInfo">[[May 2019 social media posts#CPU One Year Anniversary|As mentioned here]]</ref> '''CPU Blue Heart''' (also known as '''Scarlett Celestia''')<ref>[[June 2019 social media posts#New information on CPU Blue Heart|Name mentioned here]]</ref> came upon Chris and gave him her powers, making him CPU Blue Heart, goddess of comma nation, the Commodore consoles,<ref name="CPUBHInfo"></ref> Cwcville and all Sonichus and Rosechus,<ref name="divinerev"/> and everything else.{{refn|group="note"|Chris often suggests he is goddess of everything, since he asks people who aren't even Sonichus or Rosechus or in any of his provinces to pray to him. <ref name=psychiatrist>[[December 2018 social media posts#Chris.27s psychiatrist is taken aback|December 2018 post]]</ref>}} However, Chris only found out about this on the 3 August when his hubby Magi-chan told him.<ref>[[August 2018 social media posts#The Awakening of a CPU|Mentioned in this Twitter thread]]</ref> In the same way Chris had connected with his Dreamcast before, this time Chris connected with his [[Commodore 64]] to obtain her memories and soul.<ref>[[Sonichu 13#Transcript|Mentioned in the epilogue of Sonichu 13]].</ref> This possession has helped Chris develop his psychic and electric super powers, and helped the merge become closer as C-197s characters became more tangible in 1218. He also started feeling more energy surges and electricity flowing in him.<ref>[[:File:MergeComic4.jpg|Comic page with this information on]]</ref> Chris also felt long, loud belches as a result of the possession, which were obvious indicators of the impending merge, Chris was being given a lot of responsibility for the merge when he became CPU Blue Heart.<ref>[[:File:MergeComic5.jpg|Information here]]</ref> Chris also claims to be feeling heart attacks that he pulls himself back from,<ref>[[:File:MergeComic7.jpg|As mentioned on this comic page]]</ref> whilst these are obviously not [[Obesity|heart attacks]], they are certainly some sort of ongoing problem from Chris's [[health]], and these delusions are preventing him from getting the help he needs.

===Worship===
As late as [[August 2017]], Chris could be seen in a normal church, albeit irreverently wearing his [[unicorn cosplay]]. However, he has since stopped attending, believing that he is "unable to worship Jesus or any of the other deities" on virtue of being a goddess himself. In [[Believe in the OCs and Deities]], Chris appeals to his viewers to send positive thoughts to fictional characters, as though through telepathy, perhaps indicating that he believes divine power requires worship and oblations. (Implicit in this is Chris's long-standing secular belief that he has hundreds of millions of earnest followers across the globe.)

On 22 December 2018, in a long rant on Twitter about the [[Dimensional Merge Announcements|Merge]] (see the next section), Chris encouraged his audience to pray to him:

{{quote|I encourage Everyone to Keep Faith, and Pray to the CPUs, y’all may pray to me as well.|Chris, blaspheming<ref>[[December 2018 social media posts#Chris's psychiatrist is taken aback]]</ref>}}

He has made several such appeals in months since.

===Afterlife and eschatology===
Under the [[Idea Guys]]'s lingering influence, Chris believes that departed souls go to [[C-197]], the fictional universe that includes [[CWCville]], other [[Night Star|misbegotten OCs]] and various [[Chris and copyright|media franchises' universes]], which he believes objectively exist. He teaches that, upon death, one may merge with one's [[Sonichu (species)|Sonichu]] counterpart there. Among those who have been depicted in their Sonichu form on the other side include disastrous German chancellor [[Nombie-zazis|Adolf Hitler]], serial killer and rapist [[Ted Bundy]] and Chris's late father, [[Bob Chandler]]. Only the truly wicked, such as [[Liquid Chris]], are denied this in the hereafter: Satan instead burns their bodies in 'hell's lava pool', purges them of their memories and sends their oblivious souls to be reincarnated.<ref>[[:File:Ibachandlercroppedsmaller.jpg|Solid Chris exhibits Liquid's fate, 2016]]</ref>

Since the autumn of [[2018]], Chris has taught that we are living in the latter days. From a mixture of off-hand comments by comic artists and several [[weens]] foddering him with misinformation and dumb inside jokes, Chris thinks that beginning in [[November 2018]], the real world (or 'Dimension 1218', as he calls it) is in the process of combining with C-197, in what he calls the [[Dimensional Merge]]. Chris has attributed miscellaneous events past and present, real and fictional, ranging from tragedies like the [[Twin Falling Towers|World Trade Centre's destruction]] to salad recalls,<ref>[https://archive.md/H3gJk Chris attributes the WTC attacks to the Merge, 28 October 2019]</ref> to the impending Merge. Originally projected to be complete before [[January 2019|New Year's 2019]], Chris maintains still that the Merge is just about the corner. Chris foretells massive destruction heralding the Merge that will result in the deaths of about half the world's population, as well as half of the fictional characters from C-197. [[Chris and his ego|Naturally]], Chris, being the goddess in charge of managing this brouhaha, will be spared: everyone else must take their chances. Survivors will be able to enjoy the company of their favorite cartoon characters in the flesh, as well as their deceased relatives transformed into Electric Hedgehog Pokémon.

===Pantheon===
{{main|Hyperdimension Neptunia}}

In [[August 2016 Facebook posts#Goddess Emanuelle|August 2016]], Chris revealed that he thinks of God as a goddess. Chris has long considered [[gal-pal|women]] to be good and [[jerks|men]] to be evil, and since Chris does not want to think of himself or God as evil, he simply swapped the genders in his mind, making [[Tomgirl]] Christine and Goddess Emmanuelle.<ref>[[Ben Saint - Chatting with Chris-Chan]]</ref> During a conversation with [[Joshua Wise]], Chris revealed that he had forsaken Christianity altogether, believing instead in the CPU Goddesses from the anime ''Hyperdimension Neptunia''.<ref>[[Idea Guy Q&A#Chris abandons Christianity for Neptunia]]</ref>

Chris's view of God's nature, is [[naïve]] and even childish. He has used the fandom jargon acronym <abbr title="Original character">''OC''</abbr> as a rough [[CWC-ism]] synonym for ''god'', and uses this broad category to include Christ, men respected but not worshipped in their own separate traditions like the Buddha, ancient pagan gods such as Zeus, the ''Neptunia'' CPU goddesses and other anime characters, himself and his viewers and lazy [[My Little Pony|ponysonas]]. He is extremely syncretic, believing all of these, including the latter categories of clearly fictional characters intended and universally understood as such, to be real and divine. Monotheism, the cornerstone of Christendom that cannot be compromised, was apparently never assimilated into Chris's thought processes, allowing him to continue regard Christ as ''a'' god. He claims to converse with, and be friends with, Jesus and ''several other deities''. Nonetheless, Chris does not worship literally everybody: in a 2019 Twitter post, he was alarmed by [[Jacob Sockness]]'s apparent Satanism, saying that "no one should ever worship [[Beel|Satan]]."<ref>[[:File:BarneySatanism.jpeg]]</ref>

===Concept of Emanuelle===
Chris first uses the term '''Emanuelle''' in a [[August 2014 Facebook Posts#tl;dr|Facebook post]] from August 2014, but it is not until [[August 2016 Facebook posts#Goddess Emanuelle|a post]] from two years later ("Oh, for Goddess', Emanuelle's, Sake!") that he explicitly uses the name to refer to a female deity and not simply as a typo for "[[wikipedia:Emanuel|Emanuel]]", a Christian name for God. Chris probably got the idea of a goddess Emanuelle from one of the feminist or lesbian Facebook pages which he followed at the time, but he took it to be a literal female deity instead of a joke. Somehow Chris held on to this concept throughout the [[Idea Guys|Idea Guy]] manipulations and incorporated it into his [[CPU Blue Heart|CPU goddess]] pantheon.

In his jail letters from 2021 Chris reverts to the Biblical spelling "Emanuel" (probably because that is the spelling he encounters in the Bible which he has been reading in jail) but continues to refer to the deity as female. Chris calls Emanuel "God above all other Gods and Goddesses" and claims that she encouraged him to [[Affair with Mother|fuck his mother]], a claim which he also makes in the [[Incest call]]. In [[Jail Letter - 3 October 2021|another letter]] Chris calls "Emanuel" his mother. Some took this to mean that Emanuelle was really [[Barbara]], but Chris explained in a [[Jail Letter - 20 October 2021#22 October|subsequent letter]] that "Emanuel and Barbara are two separate individuals and souls." In 2022 he further clarified that:
{{Quote|I have never ever said nor felt my mom, Barbara Anne Weston Chandler Rosechu, was a GOD of any sort, nor is she Emanuel, or even Virgin Mary reincarnated. If anything, Barbara is the reincarnation of Merlin the Magician. But Emanuel, GOD above Gods, Was my Father when I was born in Bethlehem over 2022 years ago. Emanuel had changed her gender to female in physicality and form over a century ago. Emanuel planted an ovum from her ovary into Barbara's ovary to attract me from my forward-and-back trip through Time after what happened with me in 1389 when the Universe was divided into my second physical birth on Febuary 24, 1982 into this immortal Body of mine; with that, Emanuel is my Mother. I still am Half-Sonichu, physically, due to my trip through the apex of the Chaotic Rainbow of 2003 between Sonichu Prime and Rosey Rosechu Prime. Remember Emanuel, herself, can change her physical form into ANY Creature, including a Sonichu form. Yet [[Arceus]], the First, Main one, was manifested from a piece of her.<ref>[[Jail Letter - 11 January 2022]]</ref>}}

===Reincarnation===
[[File:IsThisMyBodyorYoursCard.jpg|thumb|200px|When you're a headmaster, the possibilities are endless]]

Chris has said that he's open to the idea of reincarnation, common in Hinduism and other Eastern religions. In 2009 he stated flatly that he believed in the concept,<ref>[[Mailbag 21#Chris gets a call from The Doctor]]</ref> but in 2014 he seemed more uncertain, writing “It is possible, but I'm not sure.”<ref name=lvlup/>. He has yet to offer any criteria for what might cause someone to be reincarnated. While reincarnation was and to some extent is still embraced by a few Christian sects, Chris has nothing to do with them and seems to have lifted the notion from [[anime|somewhere else]].

Chris has suggested that he is himself a reincarnation of various people. In [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'']], Chris's [[Comic Chris|fictional counterpart]] is the reincarnation of the [[ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan]], though he does not appear to believe this about himself in real life. However, during the epilogue of [[Sonichu 12#Episode 26: Prideful|''Sonichu'' Episode 26]], Chris mentions a real-world dream in which he discovered he had been a (true and honest) [[Homos|lesbian]] hippie who attended {{w|Woodstock}} in a recent past life. He credits this dream with his realization that he is a "female soul" and decision to identify as a transsexual as opposed to a [[Tomgirl|cross-dresser]], further calling the psychological validity of his gender identity into question. Besides his own reincarnation, Chris's explanation of [[Liquid Chris#In the comic|what happened to Liquid Chris]] in the ''Sonichu'' canon mentions Liquid's soul being cleared of all memory of previous incarnations before being reincarnated, as what Chris considers an ironic punishment for someone who dared impersonate him.

Chris believes that in other [[dimensions]], people have the innate ability to swap bodies with others, even inanimate robots.

In a [[Jail Letter - 30 November 2021 (Eels and the Egg-man)|jail letter direct to Eels and the Eggman]], Chris claims that as the Messiah, he can reincarnate or "Respawn" infinitely many times, and retain memory of all prior lives. He states in [[Jail Letter - 9 December 2021|another letter]] that only a few people besides him have an inate ability to reincarnate.

==Neo Spiritual Christianity==
{{See also|Neo Spiritual Christianity}}

Neo Spiritual Christianity (spelled without a hyphen) is Chris's self-proclaimed term for his peculiar set of beliefs concerning [[reality]] and faith, developed while confined in [[jail]] after being exposed to the Bible.

This new belief system combines aspects of Protestant Christianity with his preexisting beliefs originating in {{w|Theosophy}}, the {{w|New Age}}, [[superstition]], and the [[Dimensional Merge]].

===Cosmology===
[[Chris]] believes that he is the reincarnation of Jesus Christ and that [[Barb]] is the reincarnation of {{w|Merlin the Magician}}. He believes that his [[Affair with Mother]] constitutes a "soul cleansing" operation designed to heal and purify her.

Justified by his belief that he is the reincarnation of Jesus Christ, Chris "upgrades" Christianity to Neo Spiritual Christianity and created a new Ten Commandments that serve in part as a statement of {{w|secular humanist}} beliefs, although Chris upholds the prohibition on blasphemy and the observance of the Sabbath:

{{quotebox|
Updated Ten Commandments (Amendments)

by Jesus Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu. October 14, 2021

<nowiki>*</nowiki>1- Thou may have and worship one or multiple Gods, Goddesses, and Demi-Gods, or even none at all; which ever best feels well and good with thee.

<nowiki>*</nowiki>2- Thou may make for yourself an Idol that is safe and good and blessed; thou must not make for yourself an Idol that is harmful, toxic, or demonic to you or anyone else.

<nowiki>*</nowiki>3- Thou must not misuse the name of the Lord your God, or any other God, Goddess, or Demi-God; "God Damn It" shall be most punishable as well.

4- Remember to observe the Sabbath day (Sunday) by keeping itHoly [sic].

5- Honor thy father, mother, and any or all legal guardians who have helped greatly in your raising and support.

<nowiki>*</nowiki>6- [[Wedding Comic|Thou must not murder]], nor commit, or helpanother [sic] to commit, suicide, regardless of circumstances.

<nowiki>*</nowiki>7- Adultry is okay, well, and good, as long as all involved are direct, open, and honest with each other; thou must not commit adultry in secret from thy partner(s).

8- [[Simonla|Thou must not steal]].

<nowiki>*</nowiki>9- Thou must not testify falsely against thy neighbor, or anyone, nor testify without prior knowledge of the greater contexts and truths of the circumstances and details.

10- Thou must not covet thy neighbor's belongings.}}

The remainding cosmology of Neo Spiritual Christianity syncretizes predominantly Christian beliefs with a belief in the Akashic Records originating in Theosophy, various New Age spiritual concepts, and his preexisting belief in the Dimensional Merge and alternative universes.

==Chris and other faiths==
Given his sheltered existence in the heart of the suburban American South, Chris probably hasn't had much direct exposure to anything but mainstream brands of Protestantism. When his "fans" asked him for his feelings on other religions during an [[IRC (28 December 2008)|IRC chat]], he glossed over the question and simply reiterated his own unthinking statement of faith. At other times, his comments have been scattered and inconsistent.

===Other Christian denominations===
Chris has no connection to Catholicism, which he seems to regard as a benign but alien practice. In his comics, he assigns it to a minor character, [[Angelica Rosechu]], whose faith doesn't practically differentiate her from the rest of the inhabitants of [[CWCville]] – she's still as much of a slut as the rest of her [[Rosechu (species)|species]]. Through Angelica, it is obvious that Chris knows almost nothing about Catholicism and seems to think it's just a variety of Protestantism with nuns – he refers to Catholic priests as [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Angelica_Rosechu|"pastors"] and almost certainly doesn't know the Catholic Bible is different from the one generally used by Protestants. Also, Angelica's home congregation is called "Samuel Memorial United Christian Church," which is about the least likely name for a Roman Catholic church Chris could have come up with. He does, at least, realise that Catholicism is a form of Christianity, although he probably has no idea what its relationship to Protestantism is.

[[PandaHalo]]'s persona was designed to be devoutly Roman Catholic specifically to confound Chris's desire for pre-marital sex with contraception. Faced with this challenge, Chris tried to argue that God really does allows premarital sex because his pastor said so (ironically, deference to a cleric on ethical matters is far more typical for Catholics than Protestants). It didn't even occur to Chris that what his pastor said to him wouldn't apply to a Catholic, because Chris is incapable of seeing things from perspectives besides his own.

Chris has described "{{w|Mormonism|Mormans}}" [sic] as not being datable.<ref>[[MySpace messages]]</ref> He has never explained why, but he may have learned through [[Anna McLerran]] that Mormons typically don't date non-Mormons.

While it is not clear how much Chris knows about {{w|Unitarianism|Unitarianism}} (likely not a lot), he is not hostile toward that sect; [[Jackie]] identified herself as a Unitarian,<ref>[[Jackie#Profile]]</ref> and Chris was not bothered by this (conceivably because he didn't know what it was).<ref>[[Jackie E-mails]]</ref>

Given that he takes his own religion ''à la carte'', Chris is likely unaware of most of the differences between the sects of Protestantism, and the relationship between Protestantism and other kinds of Christianity. He has never been pressed for comment on Eastern variants of Christianity, such as the Eastern Orthodox church, and it is uncertain what he thinks of these sects, or if he's even aware of their existence.

===Other religions===
''See also: [[Chris and race#Jews|Chris and race]]''

Most of Chris's opinions towards non-Christian faiths have been culled from ''[[South Park]]'' and other television series. For example, on 28 [[December 2009]], Chris wrote a blog entry telling [[Jack Thaddeus]] to get out of the closet and "Go Into F***ing Scientology".<ref>[[CWC Blog]]</ref> Following this comment, Chris was asked to elaborate his thoughts on Scientology; he said that he neither agrees with it nor disapproves of it.<ref>[[Mailbag 52#Master of diplomacy at work|Mailbag 52]]</ref>

"[[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas Story]], and [[Sonichu 11]]" reveal that Chris has a somewhat basic awareness of {{w|Judaism}}, probably picked up from watching ''[[South Park]]''. He appears to not understand that Jews and {{w|Buddhism|Buddhists}} don't celebrate [[Christmas]], at least not the religious aspects of it. However, in the way he wrote it, it is unknown if he's implying that Christians, [[Hanukkah|Jews]] and [[Christmas#Jolly Buddah (sic)|Buddhists]] go to the same place of worship, or if he's saying they go to separate places of worship and calls them "churches" because his vocabulary is heavily lacking.{{refn|group="note"|Chris has even referred to what was most likely a synagogue as a "Jewich [sic] Church".<ref>[[BlueSpike Skype Logs 13#09-02-27]]</ref>}} In [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean]], Chris uses "Jew" as an insult (which he also got from ''South Park'') and states he is "just throwing it out there" that he thinks Snyder is Jewish; he incidentally subscribes to his father's view that Snyder, [[Megan Schroeder]] and others were secretly directing the [[trolls]] to ruin Chris's life. [[Some Favored Comedians]] is a thinly-veiled furious backpedaling attempt in which he rambles on and on about how he respects Jewish comedians like [[Seinfeld|Jerry Seinfeld]].

{{Wise|Islam is the place to go to for exorcising lustful demons; mainly by someone [[Bluespike| shoving a medallion into Chris's ass]] while shouting "Allahu Ackbar!}}
{{quote|Not to knock on Muslims, but the Qur'an is "[[Family Guy]]" and the Bible is "[[Simpsons]]".|Chris on the Qur'an<ref>[[Jail Letter - 8 November 2021 (Stories from the Penitentiary)]]</ref>}}

In a CWCipedia [[Chris-Chan (CWCipedia)#Chris-Chan the Moralf**|article]], he hints at a hatred of Islam. Although the article primarily exists to deny various accusations trolls have made about him, he does not deny being a "prolific hater of all things not Christian".<ref>[[Chris-Chan (CWCipedia)]]</ref> Years later, in a [[Jail Letter - 3 October 2021|letter from jail]] Chris responded to an [[Weens|apparent attempt to convert him to Islam]] by stating, "Allah is a good God, yes, but even he has his imperfection [sic], and concerns over his followers, and Nationality of Islam" and that "Islam contains a total population that includes around 40% of Toxic Haters, Fakers, and Sinners within it"<ref>[[Jail Letter - 3 October 2021]]</ref> (for comparison the base rate of "Toxics" in the global population is only about 18%).<ref>[[Jail Letter - 6 December 2021]]</ref> Chris's obsessive fan [[Kenneth Engelhardt]] is a Muslim convert; Chris tolerates his religious beliefs but has become annoyed with Kenneth's repeated attempts to convert him to Islam.<ref>[[Jail Letter - 6 December 2021]]</ref>

Besides using the popular Western image of the [[Buddha belly|fat Buddha]] (actually a [[China|Chinese]] monk) and mentioning "Buddha" a few times, Chris has never shown any knowledge of traditional East Asian religions, let alone any opinion of them. Indeed, [[Vivian Gee]]'s belief in {{w|Taoism}} seemed to be a concept he couldn't process, and even seemed to make him uneasy.<ref name=vivian>[[Vivitheg's AIM chat]]</ref>

===New Age===
The {{w|New Age}} is an umbrella term referring to a variety of {{w|new religious movements}} and alternative spiritual practices originating in the Western world during the 1960s, whose practitioners are referred to as New Agers. These practices include various forms of prayer and meditation conducted along a multitude of cosmologies combined with various pseudosciences such as astrology and alternative medicine. New Age beliefs often encourage [[magical thinking]], which only serve to reenforce Chris's beliefs in his supposed divinity. Unlike most other religions, New Age worship does not typically occur in organized places of worship and instead takes place at home or within for-profit storefronts.

New Age worship practices frequently incorporate yoga and other [[exercise]] routines. Considering Chris's poor physical [[health]] and attitudes towards [[exercise]], Chris will never do this. Period.

Chris has affirmed his belief in various forms of New Age practices in the past, all of which were syncretized with forms of Christianity and his own beliefs in the [[Dimensional Merge]]. Chris has performed [[tarot]] readings, believed in [[magic stones]], and [[meditation|meditated]] in the hopes of achieving astral projection.

===Theosophy===
{{w|Theosophy}} is a minority religion founded in the 19th century. An adherent of Theosophy is known as a Theosophist and believers worship at Theosophical Societies. Members of Theosophy predominantly consist of converts to the faith, rather than family-based groups.

Chris has been influenced by Theosophy in his affirmation of the {{w|Akashic Records}}, mentioned in various jail letters to fans. Owing to the religion's denial of free will, the Akashic Records are believed to be a flawless compendium of all thoughts, actions, and words spoken by all human beings in the past, present, and future. Theosophists believe that they can access the Akashic Records to "heal past wounds, lift pain and past issues, and find a higher expression for [their] [lives]."

The origin of Chris's belief in the existence of the Akashic Records is unknown. However, Chris appears to incorporate every spiritual or supernatural concept (regardless of whether it is intended to be religious or purely fictional) he finds into a bizarre pantheon of spirituality.

===Atheism===
{{quote|But... I would certainly not want to be an atheist, 'cause if I don't have [[GodJesus|God or Jesus]] at my- by my side, I would be more lost than I was considerably beforehand! Atheists are the [[Beel|Devil]]'s spawning, as it would seem! ...And I would certainly would not want to be amrong- amongst them when they are run out of town with the pitchforks and the [[Chris and English|hace]] and the fire! As a believer... I would either be a [[Chris and Anger|peacem- I would more likely be a peacemaker]], but I certainly [[Chris and Hypocrisy|wouldn't mind being one with the pitchfork]], following the crowd and pushing the atheist out of town!|Chris|[[Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]}}
Chris's opinion of the irreligious is the most vacillating and incoherent, and incidentally one of the best documented. [[Ruckersville, VA|Unsurprisingly]], he doesn't seem to like or trust atheists, but even there, he has a hard time articulating his opinion. When Vivian asked him to explain why he dislikes them, he said, "I don't know, but I do know that they are not believers of God and Jesus."<ref name=vivian/> When Chris [[Exposed - Jeremy Slonwhite of Vancouver, BC Canada‎|exposed Thorg]], his reasoning for wanting people to troll Thorg instead of him devolve from "because he's trolling me" to "because he's an 'evil' atheist". In his [[Calling Out]] videos, Chris gave "pizza-faced atheist" as [[Thorg]]'s defining characteristic, with a heretofore unseen vitriol. Chris's half-brother [[Cole Smithey]] is also an atheist, although his opinion on this is unclear.<ref>[[Cole Smithey E-mails]]</ref>

In the [[List of OkCupid Answers|OkCupid]] answers, Chris stated that he would not date an atheist. On the other hand, [[The Wallflower]] told Chris in one of her e-mails that she had no religion,<ref>[[Wallflower E-mails]]</ref>, and as the rest of the correspondence shows, Chris was not bothered by her lack of faith and [["Damian Antaria", PLEASE, Don't Leave Me - I NEED YOU!!!|continued to pursue her]]. However, in his later, revised [[List of OkCupid Answers|OkCupid]] account, he states (to the surprise of nobody) that he would be willing to date an atheist if it meant he had a chance at some [[Chris and sex|hanky panky]].

==Notes==
<references group="note"/>

==References==
<references/>

==See also==
*[[Angelica Rosechu]]
*[[Dreams]]
*[[Christmas]]
*[[Emmanuelle]]
*[[Christian's name change|GodBear]]
*[[Grace Baptist Church]]
*[[Jail Letter - 22 December 2021]], in which Chris gives his "Updated Ten Commandments."
*[[Jesus Christ]]
*[[Messiah complex]]
*[[The Binding of Isaac]]
*[[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church]]
{{Religion}}
{{Chris and}}
[[Category:Concepts influenced by Idea Guy]]

Isabella Loretta Janke

2025-04-14T14:10:02Z

Anemichu: Removed some spaces

{{Honest}}
{{Unreliable|type=misinfo|has been}}
{{Unreliable|type=cred|Bella has a habit of making edgy jokes or saying disgusting things for shock value.<ref group = note>For example, she has been known to claim to boil hamsters alive and created a video where she imitated slamming one across the floor while in a sock.</ref><ref name=allendenial>[[Post-incest leak drama#8 August 2021]]</ref>|Bella is a pathological liar and gives contradictory statements, even when speaking with friends.<ref group = note>Bella posted a Google Document onto the Chris subreddit, where she tried to deny information that has been gathered about her and her associations with other orbiters, contradicting what has already been verified or shifting blame on people she talked to. (Such as her involvement with Praetor, bragging to Fiona, and claiming that the WCT "threw her under the bus"). In that document, she'd also claim to stop talking to Chris from March 2021 to the late June of that year. However, in one of her Chess Club servers, she'd also tell [[Allen]] in a July 2021 post that she trolled Chris for "almost a year". Bella also once claimed in a chat with friends in one of the later Chess Club Discord Server that her name was not "Isabella Loretta Janke".</ref> Paradoxically, Bella will also claim she didn't actually mean certain things she said.|Bella has a history of fabricating evidence.<ref>[[Fabricated BDSM texts]]</ref>|Bella has delusions of grandeur, and often embellishes or brags about heinous or disgusting acts she's supposedly done or claims she plans to do for shock value.<ref group = note>For example, Bella [https://kiwifarms.net/threads/thread-retired-isabella-loretta-janke-bella-the-chris-chan-incest-troll-and-her-clique-of-extremely-sick-people.96787/page-502#post-9668139 claimed to one of her associates] that she had defecated on the floor of her dormroom, only to then be called out by the same associate that she had used a stock image from reddit when asked to give proof of this, to which Bella responded to with "Yeah no shit retard".</ref>|Bella will often put on a genial facade, and act sychophantic around guests, but speak very negatively of them when they're not in the same chat as her.{{refn|group="note"|Compare Bella's messages in [[Chess Club]] versus [[Chess Group 15]].}}|Along with this, Bella will often backstab or throw her presumed allies under the bus when it is most convenient for her.<ref group = note>After the incest call got leaked, Bella framed many of her associates as being the voice in the call, most infamously Fiona, whom she blamed for most of the events that have occurred prior.</ref>
}}
{{Unreliable|type=sock}}
{{Imposter}}

{{quote|[[Chris and English|Were the best trolls on history]]|Bella,<ref name = "scared">[[Bella and Fiona chats#Impact of leaks]]</ref> optimistically looking forward to the leaks.}}

{{quote|allen ive been trolling him for almost a year now and im the hardest to find according to everyone and the most secretive|Bella gloating to [[Allen]] about her secrecy.<ref name = year>[[Chess Club Chats#Chris talk coaching]]</ref>}}
{{Infobox Person
|name = Isabella Loretta Janke
|image = Bella.png
|birthsrc =
|aliases = Bella<ref name=tellnullbella></ref> ILJ 
Bella Janke Kelly Osborn<ref name=kellytwitter>https://web.archive.org/web/20210801215719/https://twitter.com/kell3osb0rn/</ref><ref group = note>Used this name when trying to keep her anonimity, and assigned it to Fiona afterwards.</ref> lilaj<ref>{{Cite farms|writer=firion|thread=96787|post=9680097}}</ref><ref>[[:File:LilajPhoto.png]]</ref> 10thanonymous<ref name=animation></ref> 10anon<ref>{{Cite farms|thread=97658|post=9790915}}</ref> Tenthanonymous<ref name=chrisanimation>[[Chris Chan Sonichu Intro animation]]</ref> an0nymous<ref>[[The Knights of CWC chats (July 2021)]]</ref> NP2348<ref group = note>After the [[post-incest leak drama]] began, Bella changed her an0nymous Discord username to NP2348</ref> nobodysbusiness77897<ref name=4chandweller>https://web.archive.org/web/20191125101916/https://www.reddit.com/r/RoastMe/comments/e0sm76/im_a_lonely_4chan_dweller_in_college_for_computer/</ref> Careless-Metal-423<ref name=chrisanimation></ref> i_have_30k_hours_on_nekopara<ref name=chrisanimation></ref> redpilled single dad<ref name="usernames">{{Cite farms|thread=97559|title=Bella's Usernames & Burner Accounts}}</ref> Kelly Andes<ref name="KellyAndes">[[Bella chats#Kelly Andes E-mails]]</ref><ref group = note>Used in an attempt to imitate the gal-pal [[Kelly Andes]]</ref> Ashley Hamer<ref name="AshleyHamer">[[Bella chats#Curiosity Stream]]</ref> Jung ji<ref name=postincest3Sept>[[Post-incest leak drama#3 September]]</ref>
|gender = {{gender|gender=female}}
|race = White<ref group = note>Thought by some to be part-[[Spanish|Latina]] on the basis of her appearance and some comments she has made, but this is contested.</ref>
|nation = American
|religion = [[Atheist]]
|occupation = Internet Troll Self-proclaimed hacker Animator
|organization = TTU Chess Club (founder, leader) Praetor (formerly)<ref name=avatar></ref>
|education = Texas Tech University (Computer Engineering)<ref name=4chandweller></ref>
|saga = {{saga|lainchu|cn}}, {{saga|crystalgate|cn}}, {{saga|everfree|cn}}, {{saga|incest|cn}}
|knownfor = • Creating [[Chris Chan Sonichu Intro animation|an animated intro for Chris]] • Being asked by Chris to act as a bodyguard at [[Everfree Northwest]] to protect him from [[Jacob Sockness]] • Being hired by Chris to be his photographer at Everfree • [[A-logging]] Chris by making edgy jokes about harming Chris or getting him to commit suicide<ref name=allendenial></ref> • Being in, and recording, a call where Chris admits to committing [[Affair with Mother|incest on his mother]]
}}

'''Isabella "Bella" Loretta Janke''', (born circa 2000s)<ref group = note>Bella [[The Knights of CWC chats (July 2021)#Bella Arrives, How Bella Knows Chris, Intentions, Convention Plans|attended college]] as of 2021</ref> also known as '''Kelly Osborn''' and dozens of other pseudonyms, is a foot fungus-ridden<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/attachments/servers-zip.2416454/ Zip file of Chess Club Discord leaks hosted at Kiwi Farms]. See "Chess club - memes" at 08-Apr-21 1:39 AM timestamp - Isabella discusses her foot fungus issues</ref> ween and self-described "lonely [[4chan]] dweller"<ref name=4chandweller></ref>, infamous for her role in a call where Chris admits his [[Affair with Mother|affair with his mother]].

In the fall of 2020, Bella was hired by the [[Praetor]] group to create the [[Chris Chan Sonichu Intro animation]] for Chris, at which point the two of them met. She and Chris kept in contact afterwards.

While Bella was friendly towards Chris in conversations,<ref>[[Bella chats]]</ref> behind his back she [[A-Logging|A-Logged]] him on [[Kiwi Farms]]<ref name=animation>[[Kiwi Farms posts (Bella)#Chris Chan Animation]]</ref> (saying that she tried to tell the trolls to get him to cut his cock off and that she thought Chris "should’ve been killed in some freak gender reassignment surgery accident by now") and her private [[Chess Club]] Discord server<ref name=suicide>[[Chess Club Chats#Suicide Joke]]</ref> (in which [[Allen]] and Bella had made what Allen later claimed to be edgy and sarcastic jokes about a plan to get Chris to kill himself).<ref name=allendenial></ref> Bella's comments led to much speculation and rumors, though no proof has been found that Bella had been serious with her A-logging remarks. Bella was also one of several people who spread rumors about Praetor following the leak of a chunk of the [[Taser Call]], claiming that she was trying to convince them to harm Chris.

In [[July 2021]], Chris began telling selected trusted individuals - Bella, [[The WCT]], [[Null]], [[Warhol / Chris Chan|Don Lashomb]], [[Spunky]], and his physician<ref name=selected>[[Bella chats#The Selected Few]]</ref><ref>[[Null DMs#Chris vaguely describes his relationship]]</ref> - that he had begun having sexual relations with an older woman. At the time, Chris was using euphemisms such as "lady friend" to mislead them and disguise the true nature of his actions.

On the night of 27 July 2021 EST,<ref name=calltime>[[WCT DMs#Asking about Incest Call leak]]</ref> Chris trusted Bella to such a degree that he decided to reveal that his [[Affair with Mother|sexual partner was his own mother]] to her during [[Incest Call|a video call conversation with her]]. Bella covertly and partially recorded the admission<ref name=incestleak>[[Kiwi Farms posts (Null)#Summing Up Post-Incest Leak]]</ref> and shared it with the [[Chess Club]] Discord server and [[Fiona]]. Chris also sent [[Incest Texts]] describing the incest further. Bella planned on how to release the information publicly, wanting to gather evidence and get more information from Chris from another angle to preserve her anonymity.<ref name=bellareacts></ref> However, Fiona shared audio from the call with the [[Chris Chan Conservation Collective]] Discord server,<ref>[[CCCC Incest Call chat]]</ref> and around the early morning of 30 July, the first of multiple leaks of audio from the call was leaked to YouTube and Reddit by Chris Chan Conservation Collective server member [[EllDudeRocks]], followed by the texts being leaked to Reddit by Fiona. Longer (though non-essential) cuts of the call were released by Bella and her Chess Club friend over the next few days. Ultimately Chris would be [[Jail Saga|arrested and charged with incest]] after concerned viewers called police for a [[welfare check]] after the initial 30 July leaks.

In Bella's attempts to preserve her own anonymity, she tried to claim that her friends were either behind the leak<ref>[[The Knights of CWC chats (July 2021)#The WCT Interrogates Bella]]</ref> or were the person behind her voice in the recording,<ref>[[Regarding Chris]]</ref> a move which led to much backlash. She was also called into question by The WCT and other Knights members in a [[Regarding Chris chats|group chat]], where she gave them a set of fabricated texts in which Chris allegedly performed BDSM-style sex on Barb, which WCT had shared onto Kiwi Farms.

In the wake of the Incest Call's release, Bella was doxed by the [[Kiwi Farms]].<ref>[[:File:SpookyDoxImage.jpg]]</ref> Out of a combination of her A-Log comments and self-proclaimed plots towards Chris, her edgy behavior, drama over the revelation of Chris having sex with his mother, and general confusion as logs of Bella's chats were leaked, speculation and gossip on Bella's involvement with Chris ran rampant, resulting in misinformation being repeated as fact.

Following the leaks, Chris denounced Bella on several occasions, viewing her as an enemy, alongside [[Null]] and [[Jacob Sockness]], even going as far to claim in many jail letters that he "foresaw" several of her claimed plots, that Bella had faked many of the details that were revealed in the Incest Call, and the repeating of several rumors surrounding her in videos.

==Interactions with Chris==
{{See also|Bella chats|4chan posts (Bella)}}

{{quote|she's actually cool to talk with|Chris on Bella, December 2020.<ref name=avatar></ref>}}

{{quote|Judgement is good, sycophants are cheap.|[[Kyle]]'s opinion on judging Bella.<ref name=avatar>[[The Place chats (December 2020)#The Avatar State]]</ref>}}
[[File:CWClipse.jpg|thumb|left|200px|Their love quests are at an end...]]
Bella claims that she first saw Chris at [[BronyCon]] circa [[2016]] when she happened to be visiting Baltimore to watch a [[autism|Rubik's Cube contest]]. Chris did not attend Bronycon in 2016, so it is more likely she saw him there in [[2019]], indicated by the date of her comment.<ref>https://www.reddit.com/r/Cringetopia/comments/cpky3v/got_a_selfie_at_bronycon_with_the_one_and_only_cwc/ ([https://archive.fo/bFCdR#selection-29237.0-29263.1 archive])</ref> She claims that she did not know who Chris was at the time and did not talk to him.<ref>[[Chess Group 15 Chats#Fiona enters chess group #15]]</ref>
[[File:Bella Twitter redrawn art.jpeg|thumb|200px|Bella tweeting to Chris (her account name at the time was lilaj60771210)]]
During 2020, Bella made some attempts to contact Chris. On 30 July 2020, she used her lilaj60771210 Twitter account<ref name=postincest3Sept></ref> to tag Chris's Twitter with messages that she had redrawn one of his art pieces and asked his opinion on it.<ref name=kellytwitter></ref> On 13 October 2020, Bella used her AshleyHammerCuriosity@protonmail.com e-mail account to send a message to Chris in which she impersonated Ashley Hamer of Curiosity and claimed that "Lilaj Montey" would want to interview Chris.<ref name="AshleyHamer"></ref> Chris is not known to have replied to the messages.

A former member of Bella's [[Chess Club]] server claimed that she constantly bragged about knowing him personally.<ref name = formerassociate>[[Discord Chat Exports#The Gambitt interview]]</ref>

Bella has also been noted for having ties with several of Chris's other orbiters. According to Bella, she got into contact with Chris via [[Praetor]] around September-November 2020.<ref name=animation></ref><ref name=bellaknights></ref> Chris also states in a [[Jail Letter - 4 June 2022|4 June 2022 letter]] that he had met Bella via his interactions with Praetor, though he also believes that them hiring her was not a good decision.<ref>[[Jail Letter - 4 June 2022]]</ref> Chris however states in a later letter that Bella had not contributed much to the group, has not participated with them while making sales, and that her only true collaboration with them was an animated intro involving Chris Chan Sonichu.<ref>[[Jail Letter - 13 June 2022]]</ref>

The troll [[Larry Vaughn]] claimed to have been in contact with Bella early on when she first contacted Chris. According to Larry, Bella told him that Chris had been attempting to contact gal-pals from [[high school]] in an attempt to reconnect with them, and that she was telling them to change their information every couple of years so Chris couldn't contact them. Larry claimed that Bella played a role in helping him manipulate Chris.<ref name=vaughn>[[Kiwi Farms posts (Larry Vaughn)#Involvement with Bella]]</ref> A Twitter account of Bella's under her "Kelly Osborn" pseudonym had also followed Larry's Twitter account.<ref name = twitter>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/thread-retired-isabella-loretta-janke-bella-the-chris-chan-incest-troll-and-her-clique-of-extremely-sick-people.96787/#post-9599908 A dump of several of Bella's Twitter accounts]</ref>

On an unknown date, Chris requested an animation from Bella, which she created. [[Chris Chan Sonichu Intro animation]] was subsequently posted to Chris on his YouTube channel on 13 [[November 2020]]. In the video's description, Chris credited an Instagram account - i_have_30k_hours_on_nekopara - the profile of which read:<ref>https://www.instagram.com/i_have_30k_hours_on_nekopara/ ([https://archive.fo/n4KdU archive])</ref>

{{quoteboxfungus|'''Fart collector''' 
I animate stuff 
45 yrs old & THRIVING in muh basement 
Fat male + balding & still sexu 
Divorced with 2 kids 😎 
I commission art (/d porn only)}}

Bella apparently changed the username to 10thanonymous at some point afterwards; Chris talked about Bella to [[Null]] on 14 July 2021, and gave him her 10thanonymous Instagram. Null was suspicious about the profile's claim of 10thanonymous being a 45 year old man, and Chris answered that Bella was joking with it, [[Naive|described her as "very intelligent and kind]]," and sent Null her real-world photograph as proof her profile age was a joke.<ref name=tellnullbella></ref>

On 12 [[November 2020]], a [[4chan]] thread on the /tv/ board was posted.<ref>[[4chan posts (Bella)]]</ref> In it, an Anonymous user (who matches known characteristics of Bella such as writing style, age, and interest in chess), posted about being in contact with Chris and asked, "What do? How do I profit from this?" The user leaked [[Bella chats#Playing Games|screenshots of Chris playing chess]]. In addition, the user claimed to be both a "troll" and "friend" to Chris, saying that "he’ll think what I say is legit, I made him watch madoka magica and convinced him it’s real, I told him to play Touhou and convinced him it was real so he believed it" and that "we genuinely talk about stuff everyday and i like to play chess with him desu". The user was met with heavy criticism from other users, and threw a tantrum at their advice to leave Chris alone and eventually claimed to have been sarcastic with the posts about wanting to profit from Chris. The user ignored warnings by other users that it would be a [[dox]] risk to continue interacting with Chris.

On 28 December 2020, Bella talked about the Avatar State, a power-up from the fictional Nickelodeon cartoon ''[[Avatar: The Last Airbender]]''. Chris promptly incorporated it into his fantasy world.<ref name=avatar></ref>

On 17 February 2021, Bella was mentioned by Chris as one option he had been considering for a potential relationship.<ref>[[Lonely feelings]]</ref> Chris showed signs of interest in her later on his planned trip to [[Everfree Northwest]]; he wanted to book a room with Bella at the hotel at which they planned to stay.<ref name=lovetriangle>[[Chess Club Chats#Everfree Love Triangle]]</ref> She claimed in a chat between herself and Fiona that Chris consistently made sexual remarks towards her.<ref name = "scared"/> However, Chris would later claim in a Jail Letter that he had no strong sexual feelings towards Bella, only stating that they were "Just Friends".<ref>[[Jail Letter - 27 June 2022]]</ref> In a conversation with [[Watchmen]] members, Chris stated that Bella was "intelligent".<ref>[[The Vaughn Interlude#Danny Boy]]</ref> Bella had also mentioned in a 25 April 2021 chat with the Chess Club member Allen that Chris has been constantly texting her, and telling her how much he "needs her", to which Allen suggests blocking him, as Bella had no interest in being his friend.<ref>[[Chess Club Chats#Instagram for Chris Chan]]</ref>

During their interactions, Chris held a positive view of Bella, describing her as "cool to talk with,"<ref name=avatar></ref> meshing with Bella's claim that she is "extremely nice to him."<ref name=suicide></ref> Bella gifted Chris with mints in the shape of Pickle Rick, markers, and a few letters.<ref name = worddoc>[[Hello everyone, it’s “bella”]]</ref> However, the former Watchmen member [[Kyle]] considered Bella a "sycophant".<ref name=avatar></ref> Bella claimed that many of the ineteractions she had with Chris were "pleasant",<ref name = worddoc/> though Chris also envisioned her as being a male Sonichu in [[Dimension C-197]].

{{quote|im garnered a reputation of being epic and anonymous and a hacker|Bella, 19 July 2021, weeks before being doxed by Kiwi Farms<ref>[[Chess Club Chats#Chris talk coaching]]</ref>}}

Bella claimed that she had cut off all interactions with Chris for a short period of time between the [[March 2021|March of 2021]] and the late [[June 2021|June]] of that year.<ref name = worddoc/> She claimed that she did this out of the surrounding CWCsphere being "toxic", as well as concerns for the [[Watchmen]] doxing people, receiving many, many texts from Chris, and the amount of work it would have taken to give him sufficient attention. Bella claims from there that she was then invited by Chris to the brony convention, [[Everfree Northwest]]. However, Bella contradicted this claim in a 19 [[July 2021]] Discord post, talking to one of her associates about how, as a result of being nice to Chris, she was able to troll him for almost a year.<ref name = year/> The full extent at which Bella had been trolling Chris by this point, however, is not known, though Bella had often boasted and bragged about being the only troll that has never been discovered.

On 19 July 2021, Chris introduced Bella to the Watchmen group [[Knights of CWC]]. As she had not initally demonstrated malicious intentions to him, The WCT said, "as long as your intentions are good, you'll be fine."<ref name=bellaknights>[[The Knights of CWC chats (July 2021)#Bella Arrives, How Bella Knows Chris, Intentions, Convention Plans]]</ref> The WCT had also had Bella's assistance to help him attempt to dox [[Naught]] following Naught doxing him for declining the use of his Kiwi Farms account. According to [[The Fool]], a longtime but now-banned [[Kiwi Farms]] user and minor member of both The Place and The Knights, Naught and WCT took conflicting approaches towards stopping Chris from interacting with Bella and the rest of Praetor when she was present in the server:

{{quoteboxyellow|Neither naught or WCT were friends with bella, bella was in her own little white knight group controlling chris. WCT tried to be friendly with her so he could keep a short leash on her, bella was very defensive about it. WCT said naught actively tried to push bella away which might be why bella was defensive about WCT trying to interact with her, but that's just from what WCT said, I didn't witness anything the Watchmen ever did myself.

both naught and WCT knew bella was a ween but they couldn't get chris to not interact with her, or the [[praetor]] crew in general for that matter. naught tried to outright demonize them while WCT tried to pretend to be friendly with them to facilitate open communication so they could know exactly what praetor was planning next. Neither plan worked, but, it's Chris, what can you do.<ref name=foolpraetor>https://www.lolcow.org/threads/naught-bismuth-anameisaname-anon-llc-nitto-nanashi-death-of-chans-doppelganger-tardwarsllc-cpu-bismuth-heart-ctrl-moe.724/post-27908 and https://www.lolcow.org/threads/naught-bismuth-anameisaname-anon-llc-nitto-nanashi-death-of-chans-doppelganger-tardwarsllc-cpu-bismuth-heart-ctrl-moe.724/post-27912</ref>}}

==Impersonations==
Bella has impersonated other people in talks with Chris.

===Curiosity Stream Employee===

Bella impersonated a [[wikipedia:Curiosity Stream|Curiosity Stream]] employee on 13 [[October 2020]] in order to get Chris to Richmond, Virginia, sending him an e-mail claiming interest in discussing with him about autism on a podcast due to his [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu comics]].<ref>[[Bella chats#Curiosity Stream]]</ref> It's unknown if Chris replied to the e-mail.

===Gal Pals===

[[File:KellyAndesEmail1.png|thumb|400px|One of two leaked e-mails where Bella interacts with Chris under the "Kelly Andes" pseudonym]]
From 1 February until mid-June of 2021, Bella impersonated high school [[gal-pal]] [[Kellie Andes]] (while misspelling her name as "Kelly Andes") in several emails.<ref name = "KellyAndes"/> During May 2020, Chris asked "Kelly" if she had an Amazon account and would be willing to buy a gift card for him, so that he could gift a female associate of his $200 for her birthday (Chris claimed his own account wasn't going through, and promised he would repay "Kelly" the money). "Kelly" agreed. As only a few of these e-mails have been leaked, and all of the leaked e-mails have occurred far between, it is uncertain how far Bella may have gone with her impersonation of "Kelly".

==A-Logging==
{{Misinfo|Despite any grotesque statements she had made, there is no concrete proof that Bella had genuinely wanted Chris to commit suicide.|includegossip = yes}}
Despite having friendly contact with Chris, Bella had engaged in some noticeable [[A-Logging]] when speaking to others, also making edgy jokes about wanting to kill Chris or claiming to have plots to harm Chris. In a Kiwi Farms post dated 15 March 2021, she described Chris as a "fat, overweight retard", complained about his [[enablers]], and said she wanted her associates at [[Praetor]] to get him to cut his penis off instead of paying him, and that he should've been killed in a gender reassignment surgery accident by now:<ref name=animation></ref>

{{quote|The [[Praetor|current “trolls”]] are just as big of retards as he is and they literally do nothing but stroke his fucking tranny cock that for some reason they won’t budge when I try to tell them to get him to cut it off instead of paying him. as much as I think the guy should’ve been killed in some freak gender reassignment surgery accident by now, I got my check to animate this shit and now I’ll dip, cya!|Bella as Kiwi Farms user 10anon.<ref name=animation></ref>}}

During a 19 [[July 2021]] conversation in the [[Chess Club]], Bella coached her friend [[Allen]] on how to talk to Chris. Allen asked why Chris trusts Bella, to which she answered, "bc im extrmeley nice to him," then said it's how she "hacked" into his bank account and "stole his money", and "got free trips and got him to join a cult and mlp porn on [Kiwi Farms] and fly [to Florida]". In this conversation, Allen joked about a suicide plot. He wrote, "I thought the plan was to get him to kill himself", to which Bella responded, "yeah but by getting others to tell him theyre jesus and they hate them and then saying "oh no those ppl are os mean :(" and then he pays me". The conversation then turned back to coaching Allen to talk to Chris. Bella advised him to avoid making comments which could upset Chris, pointing out that [[Watchmen]] such as [[MKRNightVee]] might dox Allen for it. Bella walked Allen through talking to Chris, suggesting he be overly expressive and nice because Chris doesn't interpret tones well.<ref name=suicide></ref> After the Chess Club server logs were leaked, Allen later claimed in an interview on 8 August 2021 that he and Bella had been making sarcastic, edgy jokes and that there was no plan to kill Chris.<ref name=allendenial></ref>

==Everfree Northwest==
{{See also|Everfree Northwest#Planned attendees}}
[[File:CWC-Null 14 July 2021 Bella convo.png|thumb|200px|Chris talking to Null about Everfree Northwest.]]
[[Everfree Northwest]] is a ''[[My Little Pony]]''-themed convention; Chris had planned to attend during [[August 2021]]. While making plans in July, Chris sought to put together a "posse" for "sharing and protection" during the convention, seemingly in response to being informed by [[Watchman]] [[The WCT]] that [[Jacob Sockness]] planned to attend in disguise to meet with him.<ref name=socknessalert>[[WCT DMs#Sockness alert]]</ref> On 12 July, Chris asked The WCT if he knew of anyone who could help, and WCT indicated that he did not. Chris also mentioned having asked [[Null]] and [[Praetor]]'s Caden if they could help with the posse arrangements.<ref name=socknessalert></ref> The following day, Chris texted Bella and assigned her to act as a bodyguard:

{{quote|I wanted to check in with you on an additional detail about the convention, as in while us being together as travel buddies and friends remains genuine, there is a caveat as well. You'll also play as a bodyguard and watch person, similar to [[Video games|Link's Navi]], unless you feel able to do physical work in defense as well. The reason being Sockness is making attempt to get to the convention as wells."|Chris's text to Bella<ref name = selected/>}}

According to Bella, she received a message from Chris requesting that she be his bodyguard.<ref name = "worddoc"/> Bella had agreed to the bodyguard role.<ref name=bellaknights></ref><ref name="bodyguard">[[Chess Group 15 Chats#Fiona enters chess group #15]]</ref> Chris also made plans with Bella for them to carpool to Washington, D.C. together for their flight to Seattle, WA to attend the convention there.<ref>[[Bella chats#Everfree Northwest Plans]]</ref> According to Bella, Chris also wanted her to act as photographer, paying her $500 to purchase a camera and follow him around the convention to take photos.<ref>[[Chess Club Chats#Photographer]]</ref>

Around this time, Chris was also secretly in contact with [[Fiona]], a young woman who had developed a crush on him. She and Bella would have accompanied Chris during the [[Everfree Northwest]] convention. On 14 July 2021, Chris had told [[Null]] about Bella and her plans to meet him at the convention, to which Null tells him that Bella's Instagram account claimed she was a 45-year-old man.<ref name=tellnullbella>[[Null DMs#Bella]]</ref> Chris sent Null a photograph of her. On 19 July 2021, Chris invited Bella<ref>[[Bella chats#Watchmen Drama]]</ref><ref name=bellaknights></ref> and Fiona<ref>[[The Knights of CWC chats (July 2021)#Arrival of Fiona]]</ref> into [[Knights of CWC]], a Discord server of [[Watchmen]], where they discussed [[Everfree Northwest]] and how best to protect Chris from [[Jacob Sockness]].<ref name=EN></ref> From there a love triangle formed. Chris liked Bella, Bella liked Fiona, and Fiona liked Chris.<ref group = note>Bella detailed her attraction towards Fiona in various Chess Club servers, such as [[Chess Club Chats#Bella Thirst|sharing a photo Fiona took of her legs]], [[Chess Club Chats#Even More Bella Thirst|calling her "cute"]], and [[Chess Club Chats#More Bella Thirst|claiming that she wanted to "protect" and woo her away from Chris]]. She also expressed wanting to dance with her during the [[Chess Club Chats#Everfree Dance|Grand Galloping Gala event]].</ref>

Chris was later [[Jail Saga#Arrest|arrested and detained]] before he could actually attend the convention and has since been banned indefinitely.<ref>[[Everfree Northwest#Blacklisted from attending|Everfree blacklists Chris]]</ref>

==Incest Call==
{{See also|Bella and Fiona chats}}
{{Misinfo|Despite what you may have been led to believe, Bella did not convince Chris to ''start'' his affair with his mother, although she didn't strongly discourage him from continuing having sex with his mother when she found out about it.<ref name = call/>|includegossip = yes}}
{{quote|[[Null|Josh moon]] hates me abd I'm ok with just being a legend|Bella optimistically gloating about the incest leaks.<ref name = "general">[https://kiwifarms.net/attachments/servers-zip.2416454/ Zip file of Chess Club Discord leaks hosted at Kiwi Farms]. See "Chess club - general" at 31-Jul-21 06:43 AM timestamp</ref>}}

During [[July 2021]], Chris began claiming to several people, including Bella, that he was having sex with an unspecified older woman. In his claims, Chris dropped vague hints, but also lied about, the identity of the older woman. In late July 2021, Chris decided to tell Bella that the older woman was his own [[mother]] during [[Incest Call|a video call conversation]] which Chris had initiated. While Chris was telling Bella about it, she found an excuse to begin covertly recording the conversation using her iPad.

A compilation of the recording was shared by Bella to her friends in the [[Chess Club]] and to [[Fiona]]. Fiona, in turn, shared a censored version of the file to the [[Chris Chan Conservation Collective]]; server member EllDudeRocks uploaded the clip to YouTube.

The aftermath of the leak resulted in much drama as Bella tried to avoid being doxed. In her attempts, she falsely claimed others to be responsible for her role in the call and its subsequent leak.

===Hints at an affair===

On 13 July 2021, Chris had [[Honest Content|confessed]] to Bella that he was in a relationship with a new sweetheart who is "older than him", considering her as one of the few people he can trust to not confess this to anyone else.<ref name = selected/>

On about 27 July, Chris again pressed further and dropped more hints about the nature of his relationship:

{{quote|I realize I am remaining and sounding distant on the questioning, and it will become more clear and obvious when I tell you, in-person, who she is. I actually wish I could tell you over text or voice call, but the government and anyone with the tech can easily hack into those methods.|Chris.<ref name=spill>[[Bella chats#Chris Wants to Spill the Beans]]</ref>}}

Chris stated he would "feel better and safer confiding with [Bella] in person." Chris also recommended using Signal, a texting and voice/video chatting app which features security measures such as end-to-end encryption (having used the app to communicate with [[Null]]).<ref name=spill></ref>

Later, Bella chatted with [[Fiona]] about Chris's evasiveness. Bella said that, due to Chris implying illegal activity over his relationship from his "hack" comment, she had a feeling he and his sexual partner were related. Fiona asked if it was Barbara and Bella replied "I genuinely think it might be"<ref>[[Bella and Fiona chats#Bella suspects incest]]</ref>

===The Incest Call===
{{quote|At first I did not believe it, even after Christine said “Bella, I want you to look me in the eye when I say this… I am having sexual relations with Barbara”|A supposed recounting from Bella about how the Incest Call started.<ref name = worddoc/>}}

At around 9:30 PM EST on 27 [[July 2021]], [[Incest Call|a video call]] took place. During it, Chris revealed that his new sweetheart was actually his mother, going into [[Honest Content|graphic detail]] about his incestuous relationship with her. According to Bella, the beginning of the conversation was not recorded, and she began recording when Chris showed her the vibrators and "organic lube foam" he was using on his mom.<ref>[[Kiwi Farms posts (Bella)#Incest Call Narrative]]</ref>

Bella acted nonchalant throughout, and even supportive at times. Afterwards she stated to her [[Chess Club]] friends that she never said the incest was wrong and that Chris thought it was justified, and that she said she understood so he would talk more.<ref name=bellareacts>[[Chess Club Chats#Bella Reacts to Incest Call]]</ref> Bella stated this several times when she was questioned in an interview regarding the call leaks.<ref name = interview>[[Incest Leak Interview]]</ref>

Bella made a subtle attempt to divert Chris's attention away from Barbara by bringing up [[Fiona]]:

{{quote|[Barbara]'s wise in her ways and um, you know, she has experience and she loves you, and you two have a great relationship. But wouldn't you want somebody who's younger? Right? To keep up more with your energy? Yeah.|Bella, promoting [[Fiona]].<ref name=call>[[Incest Call]]</ref>}}

Bella talked up Fiona, describing her as "a wonderful girl" who "really, really, really adores you" and painted a picture of a relationship with her:

{{quote|[Fiona]'ll be more open to stuff like, you know, having spa days, getting pizza, going out together, you know, and, she's um, she's probably newer in the bedroom, but she's willing to do it. She's willing to have fun with you.|Bella.<ref name=call></ref>}}

However Chris resisted, saying he had foretold the future and that Fiona would find someone else while at college.

===Call Leaks===

After the call ended, Bella then edited together multiple clips from her recording and shared the video call with the [[Chess Club]] and [[Fiona]]. All expressed disgust with Chris for his incest.

{{quote|Dude

WHAT THE FUCK|A reaction from Bella after the call.<ref name=bellasuitresscalltalk>[[Bella and Fiona chats#Discussion of Incest Call]]</ref>}}

[[Fiona]], though in shock, stated that "when I have sex with him, I hope it sways him away from his mother" and encouraged Bella to "please tell him to quit her for me".<ref name=bellasuitresscalltalk></ref>

Apparently around the time of the call, Chris [[Incest texts|allegedly sent text messages]] to Bella describing his incestuous actions in additional detail.

Bella intended to leak the incest news, but wanted to gather evidence from a different angle to remain anonymous.<ref name=bellareacts></ref> However, she had sent the [[incest Call]] and [[Incest texts|texts]] to Fiona, who leaked those on the night of 29 July on a Discord Server,<ref>[[CCCC Incest Call Leak]]</ref> both without Bella's permission. Bella scolded Fiona for both of these actions, evidently irritated.<ref>[[Bella and Fiona chats#Coordinating response to Chris]]</ref>

Sometime after, Bella started to gloat about discovering this revelation. In chats with Fiona, Bella said she and Fiona "broke the Internet", which Fiona did not have much interest in doing, claiming to just want to see Chris, and seemingly being worried about the consequences that may follow, to which Bella claims that she will protect her identity.<ref name=impact>[[Bella and Fiona chats#Impact of leaks]]</ref>

===Aftermath===
{{main|Post-incest leak drama}}

[[Null]] questioned Chris, who told him that he had told only Bella, consequently, Bella was named by Null as a troll with knowledge of the material.<ref name=incestleak></ref>

Bella tried in vain to avoid being doxed, namely by attempting to frame other people.

After the [[Incest Call]] Bella had covertly recorded and the [[Incest Texts]] Chris sent were leaked on 30 July 2021 (EST), the same day, Chris told [[Null]] that he had told only Bella and that he "trust her not to have directly or personally leaked or divulged this story to ANYONE else."<ref name=trust>[[Null DMs#Incest leak questioning]]</ref>

Also on 30 July, Chris began to be suspicious that Bella had leaked the files and accused her of leaking. Bella and [[Fiona]] held a chat about the matter - Fiona said "I'm telling him the trolls leaked it" and Bella set up a group chat "to confirm it was the troll i set up".<ref>[[Bella and Fiona chats#Coordinating response to Chris]]</ref> According to Chris, Bella "came forward with her side of the story, and determined the culprit who leaked the details."<ref name=wctdiscussfallout>[[WCT DMs#Discussing the incest fallout]]</ref>

On 31 July, [[Null]] pointed out the absurdity of Chris continuing to talk to Bella in spite of her recording resulting in a criminal charge pending for him and asked how Chris rationalized it, to which Chris replied that he was "spiritually guided and sound of mind."<ref>[[Null DMs#Sound of mind]]</ref> However, Chris also texted [[The WCT]] and asked for his thoughts, and WCT concurred with Null that Chris shouldn't trust Bella. Chris then agreed that Bella's story was not credible.<ref name=wctdiscussfallout></ref>

Several rumors about Bella were created and spread by gossipers, based in part on conjecture and in part on Bella's edgy joke about planning to suicide Chris. Rumors include that Bella had been serious about a suicide plot or that she had been planning to record Chris and [[Fiona]] having sex at [[Everfree Northwest]] as part of a plot to blackmail Chris into suicide by claiming Fiona to be a minor. No proof has been found to support the rumors.<ref group = note>Several other rumors about Bella can be found [[CWCki:Gossip#Isabella Loretta Janke|here]]</ref>

==Backlash from Chris==
{{Quote|Cause... yeah. But yeah. In that Bella was the real sex criminal in that. She really wanted [pounds desk] to try to get me into something, she's a real criminal. Fuckin' BIIITCH! Callin' her out. Call her out: Isabella Jenkin [sic], she's the real sex criminal, period. She did a whole mess of adulteration and manipulation and things in her own words and acts and insinuations and everything.|Chris projecting onto Bella for his own incest crime.<ref name=lievideo>[[Setting the Record straight - there never was any sex involving me in 2021]]</ref>}}
[[File:JailArt15.jpg|thumb|400px|Chris blaming Bella and Null for the Hippo on his head]]

After his arrest, Chris has come to view Bella in a very negative light, blaming her for being "falsely arrested" and other happenings.

The first cases of this are evidenced in [[Jail Letter - 8 November 2021 (RadioRabbit0)|various]] [[Jail Letter - 30 November 2021 (Eels and the Egg-man)|jail letters]]. In these letters, Chris states that he came to believe that Bella, along with Null and Jacob Sockness had "betrayal plans" and "nasty plots" for him.

One such letter had Chris claiming that the Incest Call was a "Divine Test" for Bella in hopes that she does not reveal that he had an affair with Barb. He also claimed in the letter of how he [[foreknew]] of Bella "tempting" him to suicide.<ref>[[Jail Letter - 8 November 2021 (RadioRabbit0)]]</ref> Another letter had Chris claim that karma will "bite Bella's ass around Judgement Day".<ref>[[Jail Letter - 30 November 2021 (Eels and the Egg-man)]]</ref> He also claimed in the same letter to have "foreknown" the circumstances that would pin Fiona's emotions, and how their relationship would have ultimately been ruined by Bella's "plot". He spread the rumor in at least two letters that Bella was trying to get him to out himself as a "pedophile" by dating Fiona.<ref name=pedo></ref>

In one other letter, Chris claims that he has forseen Bella's plans long before June 2021.<ref>[[Jail Letter - 1 June 2022]]</ref> Chris had also claimed in that letter that Bella had confessed to faking many of the details said in the call, such as that any sex between him and Barb had occured at all, and that the call as a whole should therefore be rendered "moot". The veracity of these claims is indecipherable, due to Bella previously fabricating evidence regarding alleged BDSM sex Chris had with his mother, while Chris had also seemingly bought a sex guide and told several people before Bella about having an affair with a "sweetheart over 50", and previously stating that he had sex with her.<ref>[[Null DMs#Chris vaguely describes his relationship]]</ref>

Chris has stated in another June letter that Bella was being possessed by evil spirits, and that he was trying to save her from them.<ref>[[Jail Letter - 13 June 2022]]</ref>

In a [[Setting the Record straight - there never was any sex involving me in 2021|17 October 2023 video]], Chris [[lies]] about his role in the Incest Call with Bella. He claims that he was trying to "troll" Bella by deliberately faking his incestuous relationship with his mother. It is also evident that he had taken many of the rumors surrounding her to heart, as he accuses her of being part of a conspiracy to abuse and manipulate him. He also repeats misinformation that Bella had intended to blackmail him with a sex tape between him and Fiona at Everfree.

== See also ==
* [[4chan posts (Bella)]]
* [[Affair with Mother]]
* [[Bella chats]]
* [[Chess club]]
* [[Chess Group 15]]
* [[Chris Chan Sonichu Intro animation‎‎]], an animation Bella made for Chris.
* [[Fiona]] - A gal-pal of Chris's that Bella had befriended.
* [[Kiwi Farms posts (Bella)]]
* [[Regarding Chris]]

{{Fan art}}
{{clear}}

{{Notes}}

{{References}}
{{CrystalgateSaga}}
{{EverfreeSaga}}
{{IncestSaga}}
{{Love Quest}}
{{Fantasies}}
{{People}}
{{Articleofthenow}}
{{DEFAULTSORT:Janke}}
[[Category:Sweethearts-to-be]]
[[Category:Things Chris hates]]
[[Category:LGBT]]
[[Category:People]]
[[Category:Zoomer Generation]]

Animal Crossing Documentary

2024-11-18T12:57:18Z

Anemichu:

The '''''[[Animal Crossing]]'' Documentary''' is an hour-long video that was filmed on 22 November [[2003]], and later featured on the ''[[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)]]'' DVD. Here, you can watch 21-year-old [[Chris]] reach the peak of his maturity, as he immerses himself in a video game targeted for kids on one cold November afternoon. Because of how the video is made (gameplay footage with the player commentating over it), this could mean Chris created one of the first-ever video {{w|Let's Play|Let's Plays}}. This video is also notable in that Chris submitted it to ''[[Nintendo Power]]'' magazine, and it was actually featured in their May [[2004]] issue.

==Analysis==
The video offers tours of two different ''Animal Crossing'' towns saved on two different GameCube memory cards. The town of [[CWCville]] is home to [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]], who wears a Sonichu outfit. The town of CWC City is home to [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Crystal]], who wears a [[Rosechu]] outfit.

Some of the narration centers around Chris complaining to [[Nintendo]] about his many personal problems. One can only imagine how the hapless ''Nintendo Power'' employee tasked with watching this video felt at hearing Chris [[Honest Content|constantly bring up]] his [[Virgin with rage|virginity]] and [[Love Quest|lack of a girlfriend]]. He expects the company to remember his [[fan]] letters regarding his dreams. He also implies that the company should send him [[Chris and reality|birthday presents]], reissue trading cards that went out of print so Chris can collect them, and adopt his fan characters as official [[Pokémon]]. He also expresses his [[Brand loyalty|distaste]] for [[Sony|the PlayStation and the PS2]], but speaks fondly of many obsolete consoles he owns that weren't made by Nintendo. He also mentions he dislikes a ''{{w|Beyblade: Super Tournament Battle|Beyblade}}'' game because it's "not real" (which is [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 2|disturbing]] in retrospect).

Chris has spent an exorbitant amount of [[Chris and money|money]] on ''Animal Crossing'', purchasing not only the base game (retailing at $49.99) but also a number of relatively obscure hardware add-ons that add functionality to the game, including the Game Boy Advance link cable (MSRP $10.00), the e-Reader (retailing at around $40.00) and numerous e-Reader cards. Chris's propensity for blind brand loyalty and consumerism is on full display here: although the aforementioned e-Reader was maligned by many Nintendo fans and is largely forgotten today, Chris fell for it hook, line and sinker, mentioning that he owns a whopping ''63'' e-Reader cards (which, considering each pack of ''Animal Crossing'' cards included five cards and retailed for $5.00, means that Chris spent a minimum of $60.00 on cards alone, assuming that the leftover 3 cards were freebies that were found loose and not purchased).

[[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys]]' [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (album)|debut album]] is featured prominently, as Chris sings several of the songs aloud and has the CD on repeat playing quietly in the background. "[[Yellow is a Mellow Color]]" plays at least three times in the span of an hour. He also sings along to parts of the game. Much like how the boatman Charon ferried the souls of the damned to Hades, a character shuttles Sonichu across a river while Chris sings in the voice that (allegedly) got him fired from [[Wendy's]]. The singing becomes high-pitched gibberish after two stanzas.

There are a few odd moments, like where Chris compares two fighting insects to ''[[I Love Lucy]]'', says a [[Niggos|dark-skinned]] hippopotamus reminds him of ''{{w|Sanford and Son}}'', and talks about his strained relationship with [[Bob Chandler|his father]] (who is described as "start[ing] more arguments than there are flies in a garbage dump"). Chris also doesn't mention the {{w|Joy to the World (Hoyt Axton song)|bullfrog character named Jeremiah}}, showing his ignorance of popular [[Chris and music|music]] outside of 90's teen pop and the older music [[Bob Chandler|Bob]] liked. Also, he will gladly [[Chris and work#Chores|pull weeds]] in this game, but not in [[Father Call|real life]].

Chris mentions "profit" from selling in-game items over and over again. This in no way involves real money and is just Chris selling easily-found items dropped by the game to purchase more furniture and crap, which he finds validating. Chris probably enjoys the game because it showers him with rewards for completing simple tasks, none of which are challenging or [[Chris and stress|stressful]].

Chris mentions that his favorite of the NES games available to play in-game is ''{{w|Donkey Kong Jr. Math}}'' because it "really [[Slow-in-the-minds|challenges the mind]] in the math area". The math featured in the game is simple arithmetic that should be well below the average middle schooler's level, much less that of a 21-year-old college student who supposedly graduated high school on the [[honor roll]].

This "[[documentary]]" also provides insight into how Chris projects his own lifestyle onto a video game. His hoarding enters the realm of video games, as he uses his island house to store almost a dozen dressers full of in-game objects. His two houses are full of clutter, his in-game bedrooms look eerily like [[Chris's room|his own]] (right down to a small bed surrounded by clutter), and he refers to every generic "nice" female character as being [[sweetheart|sweet]], and being a genuine [[gal pal|friend]] of his.

This is Chris at his most infantile, immersing himself in a game full of soft animal characters with no conflict or challenge. Throughout the documentary, Chris tells jokes that [[Random access humor|don't make sense in the given context]] and [[Chris and music|plays his poorly-dubbed versions of pop songs]]. Note that most of the animals in the game immediately run into their houses whenever Chris tries to go near them.

==Video==
<center>{{Infobox/video
| name=Animal Crossing Documentary
| ytid = 5QtOj7rNFCY
| stardate = 22nd [[November 2003]]
| maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| subject = {{Video games|text}}, {{Website|text}}
| style = {{Comedy|text}}, {{Reason|[[Honest Content|Informative]]}}
| Other = {{Direct Feed|text}}, {{Leaked|[[DVD|Leaked]]}}
| previous = [[The City of Cwicville Tour!#Watch|The City of Cwicville Tour]]
| next = [[The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special#Part 1|The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special]]
}}</center>

===Outline===

{| class="wikitable"
| 00:01-01:24 || Introduction
|-
| 01:25-19:39 || Tour of Cwcville (part 1 of 2)
|-
| 19:40-25:19 || Trip to Cwcville Island
|-
| 25:20-35:24 || Tour of Cwcville (part 2 of 2)
|-
| 35:25-36:44 || Interlude
|-
| 36:45-52:39 || Tour of Cwc City
|-
| 52:40-53:39 || Interlude
|-
| 53:40-55:54 || Conclusion
|}

==Transcription==
[''Throughout the video, the first [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys]] [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (album)|album]] plays throughout in the background, on a loop to cover the video's hour-long length.'']

'''Introduction'''

[''Video begins with the Nintendo GameCube startup logo as Chris sings along to the tune, followed by the Nintendo logo with Chris saying "Nintendo."'']

[00:24]

I love Nintendo! Welcome to my ''Animal Crossing'' for Nintendo GameCube. I am your host. My name is Christian Weston Chandler. I live in [[Ruckersville]], Virginia and [[Chris and English|I is]] [''sic''] 21 years old and I play because I am young at heart. So anyway we are going to take a tour of my ci-ty...in ''Animal Crossing''.

[''Goes to main menu'']

[00:48]

The city's name is CWCville. See, those are my initials CWC. That's why it is spelled that way.

[''Picking menu options'']

[01:01]

And my character's name is Sonichu. You may remember him from, ahh, previous letters I have sent to you guys in the past.

[01:10]

[''Game starts to load town'']

Anyway we are going to get set up now. [''Chris starts singing'']

[''Game is done loading'']

We usually do have a good time.

[1:25]

So anyway, stepping out is my character [[Sonichu]]. He's wearing the [[Chris and fashion|clothes]] with the character on it. Like I said you might remember his face. And there's his actual face.

[''Shows a sign with the face of Sonichu on it'']

You remember the rest of his body you see the whole picture.

And before we get to the daily routines I'm goin' let you...I'm goin' to take you on a tour of my [[house]] as well as uh, as well as you know, uh, a daily routine. We'll take a tour of the town, but first the house. You see this logo here, that is the logo to [[CWC's Sonichu Site!|my website on the internet]]. If you would like to visit, here is the address. I'm going to leave it up for a few seconds.

[''Shows the address to his website for a few seconds'']

[2:02]

Alright, that's enough. Now we're gonna take a [[Tour of Chris's House|tour of my house]].

Turn on the light so you can see better. This is my first floor, obviously. I keep things well organized. I got room to walk around in; I can even dance, wanna see me do I bit?

[''Chris begins to sing'']

[[Yellow Is a Mellow Color|Yellow is a mellow color]] 
Yes it is a mellow color 
Sonichu zaps a lightning 
EEEEEHHHHH mellow color 

[''Chris stops singing'']

Yeah. Course...a...when I, a...do a dance...I usually like to have my uh...audience.

[''Chris puts a wallpaper up on his house, resembling wrestling fans who just witnessed a Stone Cold Stunner.'']

Dodedododododoo. But since it's getting close to [[Christmas]], I have the snowflakes on the wall instead. And I keep it in this closet. So anyway here's a fun thing. This snowman, he teach me how to play piano. And by the way just to let you know in case...a...you can hear the, a...music in the background.

[''"[[So Need a Cute Girl]]" can be heard in the background'']

Those are my karaoke numbers that I actually ma...that I actually made up lyrics to, and I have played and, uh, sang my voice over the originals. So let me give you an example; may I Mister Snowman? "Please go right ahead!" Alright.

[''Chris begins to sing again while Sonichu bangs on the piano, which emits no sound'']

[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|Tell me why]] 
I'm stuck as a 
[[Virgin with rage|Virgin with Rage]]? 
[[Semen#Recycling|Tell me why]] 
I so need a 
Cute Girl my age 
[[Medallions_of_Fail|Tell me why]] 
I never wanna 
Hear you say 
I have a boyfriend!

[''Chris stops singing'']

And that was inspired by a [[Love Quest|real thing]]. By the way that's your website...that is your website isn't it? Nintendo.com, it's a nice place to visit; but we cannot live there. Which brings us up to our next subject...

[''A calendar of November appears on the screen'']

...the [[diary]]. You guys did a good job of it going back and forth within a 12 month radius. By the way, this is my birthday, right here my actual birthday, I was born in 1982. You guys...in case you want to take a note there. OK, that's long enough. So anyway uh, it does make a...not only does it work for a calendar, but it makes for a good monthly journal. As for a monthly journal entry here in November.

[''Chris begins to scroll up and down his journal entry'']

Yeah I tried to get a girlfriend because, I don't have a girlfriend. But I have made up a poem, let you guys read it.

{{quotebox|My dreams of getting a girlfriend was crushed by the medeling [''sic''] [[Mary_Lee_Walsh|"Mary Lee Walsh."]] 
Christian Chandler. 
November 4, 2003 
Saddest Heart in the World 
Lonesome and sad, lonesome and sad, the "Mastermind" is very bad. In efforts of getting a [[Boyfriend-free girl|Boyfriend-Free gal]], that female dog took my only idea for a fall. Heart-broken, sad and very lonely, I'll never remove my virginity. And with Backstreet Boys' tune, I sing my lonesome croon: "Tell me why I'm stuck as a virgin with rage. Tell me why, I so need a...}}

All right. Scroll down a little bit as we go along.

''...cute girl my age. Tell me why, I ain't ever wanna hear you say 'I have a boyfriend.'" And so, deep in dreary thought, a girl was what I sought. A stitch in time, will never remove my...''

It's a very good pro...poem, because I am an artist, as well as a poet. I make a rhyme every time.

''...crying rhyme. I may be destined for loneliness forever, fate is to blame...whatever. I conclude this cry, to say that as long as there are no matching girls, my happiness well runs dry.''

Anyway that's my poem, but in case...a, you didn't notice here. Look right here, "Tell me why, I'm stuck as a virgin with rage." I put my song lyric in here because it was inspired; because I do not have a girlfriend. You know why, cause I have a [[Noviophobia|phobia]] that every girl I talk to she already has a boyfriend.

Right. So anyway moving on with the tour of my house. As you can see I've got- I'm collecting the NES games. I've got most of them down here, and I've got a couple upstairs. One of 'em's fake you know the one I'm talking about, does April 1st strike a bell? But my favorite game is right here.

[''"Would you like to play 
DK Jr MATH?"'']

I like it because...a, it really challenges the mind in the math area and gets your memory fresh there. And by the way, notice the two logos here?

[''Chris is making a motion towards the GameCube and N64 logos'']

It's a good way to welcome the guests, that come into your house. Ol' Nintendo 64 on the left, and GameCube on the right, caught them before an after deal. Oh and look at this, a good little south feng shui here. Of course makes for a good welcome mat. Speaking of feng shui, I've got my red items against the east side, in hopes of getting more NES games; specially that Wario's Woods. By the way, how the heck do you get that game anyway? I mean all you tell us do to is to go to Animal Island. And then what the heck do we do? You should have given us more details, back in the previous issue of uh, the Crossing Guardian.

Speaking of which I've been a long time subscriber. So therefore I've got all their previous issues. And I time travel back and forth when I start ''Animal Crossing'' to collect a few items, but in respect to uh...time traveling back because I missed a few items, I made a new character named "Tim Timetale" and, uh, he time-traveled back and got the remaining items, give them to me, as well as the other character I made up, and, uh, the, uh, the other city in Slot B, which, uh, I'll tell you about that later.

[6:45]

[''Character walks up stairs to the second floor of house'']

Anyway, we're going upstairs. This is my [[Chris's room|bedroom]]. It's a lot of fun, isn't it, because I like to make things fun since, you know, I'm young at heart. And here's a fun joke. Turn on the [[TV]] [''he does, but it just shows static''] sit down and watch TV while I wait t-to get on the [[Internet]]. It's a good way to kill time anyway. Anyway, here's the fake [''brings up caption for the April Fool's NES game, Super Tortimer'']. Sound familiar? Right [''[[sigh|sighs]]'']. Anyway, this is my bed. The harvest bed. Nice choice, isn't it? I'm going to take a quick nap.

[7:17]

[''Character lays down on bed while Chris makes snoring noises too close to the microphone'']

OK. Nap's over. All right. You want to see my music collection? [''Brings up music menu''] It's all good. I got them all courtesy of K.K. Slider. Well, of course, the first one was a freebie from the e-Reader card. "Swipe, Swipe, Swipe". Anyway, here's the fan and the Mario Brothers stuff. Oh, and uh you notice what time it is? It's 1:15. Good time to start. In the afternoon.

[7:48]

[''Character walks down stairs to first floor of house'']

Anyway, now we're going down to the basement.

[''Character walks down stairs to the basement of house'']

Let me just turn on the lights. I keep my models down here. It's a nice little aero fa [sic] models, and I leave enough room for me to walk around in. Well, that's a cute joke.

''"Hey. Stop. You're under arrest."'' 
''"What for?"'' 
''"For, uh, being the black market, you red fox."'' 
''"Ah, geez."'' 

And I got both houses. Yeah, I scored that high with the HRA. Notice this train? I wonder where it's headed to. It's probably headed over to the memory card in Slot B. I'll tell you about that city later. Anyway. This is where I do my cooking. If, uh, if you can ever do your cooking in ''Animal Crossing'' for Nintendo GameCube. I have that DVD. And this is the fridge. I could store my food in there, but I can't. What? Does it have a padlock on it or something? Oh, look. Here's my phone. Let's make a phone call. [''Pulls up phone menu, calling the Dial-a-Psychic''] Hello?

[''The Dial-a-Psychic says:'' [[Chris and his ego|Even if you're doing well, don't show off in public! Everyone's watching!]]'']''

Thank you. Good advice. Hey. Let's have a seat on this thing. I like this thing. Listen to this. [''Character sits on the couch and it [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|makes a fart noise]]'']. Let me do that again. [''Character again jumps on the farting couch''] One more time. [''Character again jumps on farting couch with predictable results''] OK. That's enough. Too much fun and [[Random-access humor|you'll die laughing]].

[9:04]

[''Character walks up stairs to first floor of house'']

So anyway, that's my house. Let me just turn off the lights before I leave.

[''Character walks out the front door of house'']

Alright, now where going to go through my daily routines. As well as a tour of the town.

[''Pause menu pops up'']

You notice I've got an empty inventory. And by the way, here's a good rule of thumb. Keeping my shovel, net, pole, axe, and letters here on the bottom row. You know why? I'll tell you bout that when we get to the Nook shop. Anyway, I usually check my mail; what do you know I got three presents. Let's see what this one is though. [[Bob]].

''How ARE you, Sonichu? Well now, I bet your bottom Bell you didn't expect me to cut out and split town, huh? Nope, I shocked the world! I'm turning over a new leaf- see you on the flip side! Laters, Bob''

Oh I guess he moved out, oh well.

[''Sonichu proceeds to throw out poor Bob's letter, then collect his gifts from the remaining letters'']

Anyway, let's see what we got from the, uh, probably from the museum; because I dig up those fossils and uh...I sell them. Makes a nice profit.

[''Sonichu throws away all three letters'']

I just quickly uh read through them and then throw them away. You know like...junk mail! You could also say pop-ups if they had "x's" on em.

[''Sonichu begins to open his gifts'']

See what we got here, A dinosaur track, a Tricera tail, and a dinosaur egg. Well that'll make a nice profit. By the way, in case you missed it the first time I'll put it up again.

[''Once again shows the address to his website'']

Ok you got it, alright now. Before we head to Nook's shop which will be the last stop on the tour; we go- we're gonna take the rest of the tour here. Alright let's see. Well this is the train station. But I travel to the other city which I'll tell you about now. The name of the city is CWCcity. Spelled C-W-C-c-i-t-y, we'll visit there later, but not by train of course. It'll be a hou-It'll be a run by the, uh, character named [[Crystal_Weston_Chandler_(sister)|Crystal]], C-r-y-s-t-a-l, when we get there. All right. Oh, look at this, a hole in the ground.

[''opens the menu to equip his golden shovel'']

Yeah, you see, sometimes there's an item in CWCcity. I don't have it here in CWCville because I have CWCville a lot longer than CWCcity. I bring stuff from CWCcity over here.

[''he digs up the buried item - it's a folding chair'']

'Cause obviously I did not collect this one yet. I got a good memory.

[''Sonichu screws up and digs another hole; he cleans both of them up'']

And also, you know, I got a good taste for music because I grew up on music. So anyway let's move on with- oh, you notice this [a golden statue of Sonichu]? You know why this is here?

[''This statue was erected in honor of Sonichu's full loan repayment!'']

I paid my debt. And this is Sonichu's mug again, right next to the master.

[''Sonichu runs past a sign reading "H.F.A." with two almost invisible red eyes'']

Oh, look at this. H.F.A. And very mean eyes. Must mean something bad. ...I know what it means. I'll tell you about it at the end of the documentary here. Uh, the city of CWCville and CWCcity, or otherwise all the deal [?] in ''Animal Crossing'' for Nintendo GameCube, in a nutshell.

[''Sonichu enters the acre with the post office on it'']

So anyway, here's the post office, do my mailing and such and the e-Reader swipes. By the way there's a good way to profit from the e-Reader, I'll tell you about it in CWCcity.

[''Sonichu comes across a shining ring in the ground'']

Oh, what do you know! A money spot. I'll just dig up the thousand bells.

[''Sonichu pulls a shovel out of his inventory and digs up the money sack'']

Yep, thousand bells, just bury that up. Mmm, drag it up there. Use the R button to quickly pick up the items.

[''Sonichu enters the acre with the dump in it, he enters it'']

Anyway, here's the dump. I come here first, pick up the- whatever items I want every time I start ''Animal Crossing''. Hmm, got a shirt, what do we have here? A plant. I's have picked up a pothos before so I know it's a plant.

[''Sonichu starts wandering into some acres filled with trees'']

I don't really use plants in my house you n-n-noticed, except for that Christmas Tree but that's for, you know, the holidays. Anyway she's around here, I want to show you my favorite character that I kind of got to know from the start.

[''Sonichu finds his way into an acre with a house on it; Mint, a green squirrel, rushes into the house'']

Oop, she just went in. So let's go say hello.

[''Sonichu knocks on her door and walks inside. Mint is hiding behind her furniture'']

Yeah uhm, uhm, would you come out here please?

[''Sonichu walks back into the center of the room and back into Mint, pushing her into a corner'']

Mmm... Darnit, I can't see her but anyway uh, I think you recognize her. Oh here we go a little bit. Yeah Mint, she's a sweety.

[''Sonichu talks to Mint about some random crap'']

She gave me a birthday present on my 21st birthday when I time-traveled back. Talk to me!

[''Mint rambles on about how it's cold out and how winter's coming'']

Well, what did ya expect? It's November.

[''Mint asks Sonichu if he has a heater'']

Yeah I got a heater in the basement.

[''Mint jokingly mocks him about turning on heaters during November'']

[''Chris chuckles''] Yea.

[''Mint says something about how it's going to get colder'']

That's right. Well, I'll see you later Minty, you're a sweety.

[''Sonichu leaves Mint's house'']

Anyway, let's uhh, also on the trip, we'll take a look at all the other colorful characters we have around here.

[''The town map comes up, different acres are examined'']

Also uh every time I keep track of the-uh map so that I can see if anyone new came in. Oh, we got a new neighbor, Bertha. I haven't noticed her before. So she's obviously new. So anyway uh, let's move on.

[''Sonichu starts running through the woods and comes across some kangaroo'']

Here's another character I grew up with. Actually she moved in, and lived here most of the time. Marcy. And now she's wearing a Sonichu shirt. Sonichu is very popular in CWCville.

[''Sonichu heads south to an acre with some green mouse's house in it'']

There's Anicotti, she just went in.

[''Sonichu heads west and finds some horse's house'']

And there's Elmer. He just went in, he's one of the senior citizens around here too. I say that because he's lived here- by the way our ne- our city pe- fruit is a peach. But I've grown a lot of orange, pears n such.

[14:15]

[''Sonichu heads west and finds a white cat, she says something about how CWCville is amazing'']

Oh whaddya' know, it's that girl from the train.

[''He talks to Blanca'']

I draw her face every time, but when I'm in a hurry I just color it, the whole thing, and she just looks like a... ''Blank face''. But I gave her a face last time.

[''Sonichu starts to head out of the acre but turns around and runs back in, [[Yellow Is a Mellow Color]] begins to play in the background. Chris's "singing" is clearly audible'']

Oh, there was another character up here on the hill.

[''Sonichu heads to a goat's house by a river'']

And she just came out, Chevre. What do you know, she's wearing Elmer's clothes.

[''Sonichu runs out of that acre back into the woods'']

Anyway, moving on with the tour.

[''Sonichu comes to some giant tree with a fountain thing in front of it, Chris mistakes it for a well. Some billboards are to the right of it'']

Well, [Chris chortles] good joke. Anyway I also, you know I like to use the billboards, put my signs up. There's my Sonichu site logo, there's Sonichu's mug. I got two here side by side represent the holidy and such. Yea here we got your corn that you got from the previous issue and I drew this leaf.

[''It doesn't look like a leaf'']

Obviously for Thanksgiving and the harvest festival.

[''A blue bear walks into the video'']

Oh, look there's Groucho. He's wearin' a Sonichu site shirt. Let's say hello.

[''Sonichu starts speaking with Groucho'']

Entertain me.

[''Groucho bitches about his mom and fruit'']

A fruit huh?

[''Groucho offers Sonichu an apple, Sonichu accepts'']

I-I'll take one. Yeah, it makes a nice little profit when you talk to them and most of the time it happens from the jobs.

[''Sonichu walks east and comes across a green lion's house'']

So anyway. Yeah, here's Leopold, he moved in a long time-

[''Sonichu makes his way to a green rooster's abode'']

Here's Hank, he's one of the senior citizens around here also. [unintelligible]

[''Sonichu runs to a teal hippo's house'']

Let's go see our new neighbor. Oh, here she is. She must be Bertha. Hello Bertha.

[''Sonichu talks to Bertha, Bertha talks about how nice the town is, etc.'']

It is a nice place. Heh you're scatterbrained. Yeah, okay, well see you around!

[''Sonichu heads south towards a museum'']

[Chris Grunts] Here's the Museum.

[''Sonichu heads inside'']

Let's go look at the exhibits.

[''We see the inside of the museum as Sonichu heads toward the insect section'']

First, we'll look at the bug exhibit.

[''Sonichu is now inside the insect section'']

I caught most of the bugs.

I'll show 'ya. This is my bug collection, I caught them all one-by-one and donated them one-by-one.

[[I Got A Fish|Wanna' see my number of fish?]] Not as much. Not as much. Anyway, uh, all the bugs are just runnin' around here. Hey, whaddya' know, we got a couple- few bugs on the trees here. Two of them are fighting. Well, that's funny, like [[cats|Lucy and Desi]]. [[I Love Lucy|I love Lucy]].

Anyway, uh, nebit, cebit, zibit, the fish exhibit. Yeah, you can see here I caught those fish and I donated them. Hmm, this one is empty. I guess it's waiting for a kind donation. Yeah, here's a bunch of fish; here's some more fish. One fish, two fish, red fish, blue fish.

Alright, anyway, moving on with the tour the museum, take a look at the paintings. I haven't gotten them all yet, but, uh, I got a few. Here's a nice one, it's strange though. sw- why- I gu- why I'd call it a strange painting. Yeah, some of them are- most of them are just waiting for a kind donation, but I got this one from a swipe. Your uh, Common Painting, from Ol' Boots. Well, my favorite painting around here is, uh, right here. Washington crossing the Delaware, but you guys call it the Classic Paining.

Anyway, moving on. We're gonna' check out what I worked hard for and actually got done, the fossil section. All the fossils, right here; all of them! Dug them all up! Though the last one I completed and the last one I picked up was the pterodactyl. All I needed was the right wing and that completed the pterodactyl. As well as the fossil exhibit; and who's my favorite? It's obvious.

Anyway- oh, you can actually see a bug in that amber, y'know? That right there, I wonder what kind of bug that is. I think it was in the, uh, insect thing. Oh well, forget it. Anyway, moving on with the tour, leaving the museum. See you later, sleeping Blathers.

Well, here's another neighbor, Cookie; She just went in. Alright. Well, anyway, uh, since we're, uh, down here, I'm gonna' tell you a couple of things. This is a- here's a- here's the dock, right here, and there's the sea turtle. Of course I usually would check around the, uh, beach lines for old Gulliver, that sailor bird. You should have called him Pelliper like the Pokémon. You notice these two signs here? You need a Game Boy Advance to get started, but when you come back, welcome to the GameCube.

Anyway, let's go visit the island real quick, 'cuz I'll show you something fun you could do on the island. I use my Game Boy Advance SP but I do have a GBA as well. Well, I use the, uh, SP for, uh, y'know the e-Reader because y'know my Digimon players. It's, uh, easier to hold as swiping as, as compared to the, uh, GBA, the original.

[''Chris starts singing Kappa's song''] Yeah- this [[Sweetheart|sweet young lass]], so full of spunk an' sass, over tea, she tells me I gots no class. I ain't no [[Pedofork|crummy creep]] who lives in [[14 Branchland Court|trash heaps]]! I'm just one old sea-hun who needs some [[Crash into slumber|sleep]]. [''Chris imitates the unintelligble gibberish of the game's characters'']

[''Kapp'n:'' Yar, tell me somethin', me little buckaroo... Ye got yerself a girlfriend?'']

[''flatly''] [[Virgin with Rage|No, I do not.]]

[''"sings" Kappn's song in gibberish''] Woooh! I know, the singing annoys me too. I just mock it, and that's- that's why I kinda' have this thing on mute anyway. I listen to my music... every time I play. I actually turn it off right after we- just after we- just as we leave the, uh, bridge there.

So, anyway, this is my island, Cwcville island. Looket all these coconuts here, "In the tropical seas with the coconut trees, we will look and see, coconut." Fine little way to make a profit. Here's Flash. "Troz." I gave him that expression, like ''{{w|Pinky and the Brain}}''. So, let's say hello.

''[Flash asks for Sonichu's [[Fashion|rugby shirt]]]

I'll let you have it, 'cause [[Muscle bra|I don't need it]]. It doesn't look too bad on you.

Anyway, here's a fun way to make a profit, a'course, you need the Gameboy Advance for this. You shake the trees, you grab the coconuts. I put them all over her- I gathered them all over here, in this area, and then I just drag them over to the bird. And after the first three coconuts, he gives me money. And I just all put 'em back in the proper place around here. And when I come back to the island, Gamecube version, instead of the uh, on the Gamecube instead of in the Gameboy Advance, after uploading I collect the money, go as high as 30,000 bells, which is very nice.

Anyway, I'll show you what you can do on the house in the island.

[''Goes inside the house'']

I use mine as storage for the, uh, extras items I, uh, don't have room for, at home. Yeah, I got a bunch. 'Course, I got mostly wallpaper and shirts, that's why I got all these dressers.

[''Looks inside a dresser'']

But I've gotten all the uh, carpets from, uh, Sahara. She was here yesterday. Wel- How do I know? I usually keep track, I made a special sticker with my Game Boy Camera and I just uh, whenever there's a holiday or ah, when there's a special event as noted by the Copper, I note it on the calendar with one of those special stickers, or write it down whether it's for Cwcville or Cwc City.

[''Exits the house'']

Anyway, we're going to leave the island. See you later Flash! Troz! Or Zort!

[''Goes to Kapp'n so he can leave'']

Hey Kapp'n. Yeah I'm leavin'. No thank you.

[''Gets on the boat'']

Oh, by the way Sonichu's mug is the flag of the island. Obviously. Don't worry, this time I'm not going to imitate his singin'.

Instead I'll talk about something random. [[Sonic the Hedgehog]].

Oh, by the way, those two characters at the tailor shop, Mabel and Sabel, are they hedgehogs or porcupines, cuz I dunno. They look like hedgehogs, and or porcupines, but ah, I'm not sure which are they. But either way, if they're hedgehogs, you got my vote on Sonic. Speaking of which, you should have make- ''Sonic Heroes'' should be Nintendo Gamecube exclusive, because [[Xbox]] and [[Sony|PlayStation 2]], my opinion is the same as yours, they both stink. Yeah, I do not even own them, I do not even want them, and that goes double for the PS One as well.

But if you want to know my game systems, I've had my Gamecube for about almost a year and a half now, got it on May thirty-first, twenty o'two. I got your SNES, Nintendo 64, NES, I got the Genesis 301, with the uh, original Genesis, 32X and Sega CD, as well as Sega Dreamcast, and a Sega Saturn. So I've got mostly all of them, I've been a Sonic fan forever, and that's why I'm glad that Sonic came to Nintendo.

[''Arrives back at Cwcville'']

By the way, you all may remember, that I sent you guys a letter, talking about my dream of Sonic on Game Boy, well you go on my website, check the uh, about the author section, you'll see the ''[[Nintendo Power]]'' magazine cover I made up just for the occasion.

Anyway, welcome back to the Gamecube, let's move on with the tour, shall we? Anyway, we're gonna check the island. Oh, Lighthouse, oh will look at this, there's a weed, I pick weeds, keeps my town clean, as well as uh, Cwc City.

Oh, here's the other billboard I don't kn-know if I've shown you, [[Pokémon|Magikarp]]. that's for the fishing tourney, I drew a Magikarp just for it. Yeah, that's a Magikarp, I didn't have room for a Gyarados.

So, way, ah, here's the Tailor Shop. I got a Game Boy Advance right here as well because, you know, I can use my Gameboy Advance here. So let's go in and see what I got on display.

[''Enters Able Sisters shop'']

Yeah I mean what are they, hedgehogs or porcupines, cuz I can't tell. Anyway, I got Sonichu an Ro-, I got Sonichu right here. Oh, and by the way, this is his girlfriend, you want to know what her name is? [[Rosechu]]. See how that's spelled? Yeah, but you'll see- you'll probably see her and her body on the uh, letter that's included with the VHS here. So anyway, that's her favorite flower, called the Zapbud. Oh, and there's my Sonichu site logo, there's you acc- that you featured in ''Nintendo Power''. And a nice (swipe?) for the Poké Ball, as well as Star Fox emblem.

[''Opens up his saved patterns'']

Here, let me show you the uh, rest of my uh, patterns. Most of them I put together. There's Sonic, right there. And this is Sonichu's evil twin, [[Blake|Black Sonichu]]. I made the Mario as uh, kinda like, you know, the ''Nintendo Power''. Duh. If you guys had a shirt already, and the uh, game, that's from me and then you'll find out later. Oh, because [[It will never end|Spider-Man]] was in town recently, I was inspired. An here's Old Glory. Let's see. Yeah, these are the uh, older patterns I uh, kinda picked up from the shirts as much. And these are patterns I put together myself, there's the Magikarp, and there are others, like you got from ''Nintendo Power'', like the corn, [[the Moon]], groovy. Groovy! I call it groovy. There's the mushroom and the mug. Oh, I got something ready for Christmas, you know, you may notice the wreath back there. Let's see, yeah, here the uh, swiped images. Ah, by the way, you remember Tim Timetrail, that's his logo right there, I call it Time Travel, it's got his name written on there, Time- Tim Timetrail.

Could you excuse me for a minute, I've got an itch in my eye. [''A few seconds pause''] Alright. Anyway, that's taken care of. Let's see, I guess.

[''Selects Time Travel shirt and moves it around'']

What'd I do that for? I'm putting it back. Anyways that's-a, images I got so far.

[''Talks to Mabel'']

No, no thank you, we got nothing. So I'll see you all later. Or ah, another day, somewhat. Hey, I think that looks uh-familiar, what Mabel's sewing up, or's that Sabel? I think that's the noodle design.

[''Exits Able Sisters shop'']

Anyway, moving on. Another weed, well what do you know about that. I usually like to run, it ke-keeps me going faster. Oh, by the way, Puck lives here.

Oh, what do you know, a hole in the ground. I usuall- also usually uh, during my rounds, ["Digs up fossil"] I check for these holes. ["Raises pitch of voice"] And it's an antique! And of course, if I dig up a fossil I just quickly write a letter to the Museum. And I don't have to write anything, so I just get that out of the way real quick. I only keep my shovel in hand cuz there may be a few more holes around here somewhere. Well look at this, another weed.

Anyway, no bird today. So le- let's go see Copper, see if there's anything new at the police station.

[''Talks to Copper'']

Any goings-on? Nothing of import, huh.

It's hard to catch that b- bird you know, the uh, postal character Pete. One time I tried, but then he just flew away. Anyway, you got anything in the police station today Copper? That is uh, anything lost? Oh, we got something? Oh good, I'll go take it, I just usually pick it up and sell it later.

[''Enters police station'']

By the way, as fer the Gulliver, if he has something I have not collected yet, I'll usually keep it. Seeds? Oh well, I'll take it. I could always plant those. Cuz they won't make much of a profit. Anyway, if uh, Gulliver has a gave me something that I already have, I usually just sell it.

[''Exits Police Station'']

Makes a nice profit. Uh anyway, let's plant these flowers. Uh, here's a good place.

[''Plants flowers'']

Alright, what do you know, red tulips.

Anyway uh, there's ah, what's her name. Oh yeah, Portia. Anyway, uh, let's see. Oh yeah, there's Leigh right there.

Oh by the way, you know for Mint? I got her card as well, her ''Animal Crossing'' card. Oh yeah, Chuckles! He likes to wear belt buckles! [[Random Access Humor|Rhyme joke]]. So anyway, uh, moving a little north. Here's the uh, Nook Shop. I got it the best, obviously. But if it gets any better, I'll be surprised. So anyway, uh, let's go inside.

[''Enters Nook's Shop'']

See what see what look lik- See what old Nook has today. [''Sighs'']. Oh, I got to sell these items, I usually do that, I sell him the items.

[''Starts selling things to Nook'']

Items I don't need. Those fossils make a nice little profit, espeg- especially the uh, one that's not within the top five. Whoops. I pressed the B button by mistake.

[''Continues to sell, and starts to hum'']

Doops, I goofed. Yeah, foreign fruits, 500. Although the peaches only get you 100 here. By the way, same fruit in Cwc City, it's a pear. Oh, and I need a sign anyway, so I'll just go ahead and get one of those.

[''Buys sign, clicks through Nook's dialogue about using the sign, and starts humming'']

Anyway, we're going upstairs.

[''Goes upstairs'']

What do ya know, we got the gruesome twosome. They're a comical pair. Ugn, let's see, a blue dresser. Uhh, iris table, refrigerator. Yes, I got this refrigerator already, so I don't need it. I already got the water bird. I've seen those shirts before. Ugn, look at all of these two, they chase me around wherever I go, like I'm some sort kind of [[Autism|nut]] or something. Watch this.

[''Chris makes odd noises that might be mistaken for humming, as he runs around the store and watches the salesman chase him. Sometimes art does imitate real life'']

Almost caught me there. Okay, I'm leaving.

[''Goes downstairs'']

Let's see, was there any other business I need? Oh, I guess I need more paper. So I'll get a sheet, get a pack.

[''Buys paper'']

That's quick, I just pick a random style and just go with that. By the way, in case you're wondering about those button noises, I got the microphone taped to the uh, Gamecube Wavebird here.

Anyway, I'll show you something you can do with the raffle tickets you pick up from here.

[''Exits Nook's Store'']

Instead of making a [[Tour of Chris's House|mess in my house]], I bury them right here, next to the Nook Shop. It's a good place to locate them. So when I'm ready at the end of the month, I just pick up as many as I can hold.

[''Digs up raffle ticket, then buries it again'']

I'm just going to put it back, because it ain't November 30th yet. Oh I guess I don't need this shovel anymore.

[''Puts away shovel'']

Now I'm going to make use of this uh, sign here, the way I should have long time ago, because I didn't think about it. It's already been done in Cwc City, but... Right here by the Post Office, you can use your GBA, oh, well that's a bad place for it. I'm picking it back up. Oh what do you know, another weed.

[''Pulls weed'']

Must of missed that earlier. Anyway, you may post a design, Gameboy Advance, whoops.

[''Picks up sign accidentally'']

What'd I do that for, I'm puttin' it back.

[''Puts it back and adds Gameboy design again'']

There we go. [''Burps''] Excuse me. Hm, I've got well over fifty thousand, so I'm going to make a deposit.

[''Enters Post Office'']

It's ny- It's a good idea to- that you guys did have when you made this thing not only a post office. Oh, I got to mail off that fossil anyway. And I don nee- And it's a good idea to not only you make this into a post office but a bank, saves ya a building. So anyway, see, let's make a deposit. One, two, three, four, five.

[''Deposits 50,000 bells'']

Seven hundred and fifty thousand. It's good saved. I made most of my money from the e-Reader swipes, which I'll tell you about that in Cwc City.

[''Exits Post Office'']

Anyway, uh, lets see. I guess that's it for Cwcville. You guys will be back later. And that- And when you come back, I'll tell you about this sign here. [''Sign saying "H.F.A"'']

Anyway, I'm going home, and I'm gonna save. You may save, Mister Gyroid.

[''Goes inside the house to save, hums a bit'']

You may save and quit.

[''Noise in the background, possibly the radio'']

[''Chris begins to sing''] Do-do-do-do-do-do-do, hey mellow color! Yellow is a mellow color, yes it is. [''Chris stops singing'']

Okay. see you in Cwcville- I mean Cwc City.

[''Title screen'']

At this time, I switched the memory cards. Cuz, ah, I got Cwcvville currently in Slot A, and Cwc City in Slot B. I'm switching the two, putting City in Slot A and Ville in Slot B. So now I'm pressin' the start button.

And here's a resident, Iggy. Here you got- get that down. Cwc City, that's the name of the city right there.

[''Yellow Is A Mellow Color playing faintly in the background'']

And that's her name, Crystal, make sure you get that down. Alright, getting things ready. Have a blast, huh, well that's a fun thing to say.

[''Cwc City is loaded, and starts'']

Anyway ah, this is Crystal. She's wearing the uh, Rosechu look. There's a Zapbud on the door, I got Sonichu- Rosechu's mug right here. [''A sign with Rosechu's face on it''] Yeah, an her ensemble, but let's take a tour of her house first.

[''Goes inside the house'']

It ain't much since, uh, she basically got started, but she's almost done paying off her debt to old Nook. There's your website again. [''A Nintendo bench with their website on it''] Oh look, there's the R-Wing, launching into the uh, Super Mario Brother's World. [''The wallpaper is from Mario'']

Which reminds me, I got to get those two boxes to those two passwords later. Anyway, here's her diary. She got started only on November twelfth. Sonichu got started on October twenty-fourth. Anyway let's see, what else have we got here. Yeah, I got the two logos. Well would you look at that, I got them in the wrong place.

[''Starts moving around the logos'']

Oh well, I'll just move 'em. I didn't notice that before, I got 'em in the wrong place. Well that's no problem. I'll just quickly move them around. Hm, they make it loo- You guys make it look tough to move things around, but actually it's not. Let's see what time it is. Oh, it's one forty-five, huh? Well, it's getting close to being later in the afternoon.

There's her tree, she's getting ready for Christmas too. Let's take a quick trip upstairs.

[''Goes upstairs'']

She got her NES games she got collected up here. A plain old falsehood right there, Super Tortimer. Why'd you guys make that game up anyway? It's so- It's stupid. Cuz it's fake. Anyway, here's a thing. I got lucky and found this. I think I dug it up. Oh-no, wait a minute, I got it from Redd, long time ago. Oh, here's her harvest bed. I got a couple empty tables for- getting ready for a couple more NES games. [''Sighs'']

[''Goes downstairs'']

Anyway uh,

[''Continues down to the basement'']

Her basement isn't sa- as busy as uh, Cwcville, but she's got a few models down here. A couple of tracks models. Oh, there's the Moon. You guys made that thing really big you know, it's too big for me, if you ask my opinion.

Huh, Katrina's a little off, I'm just gonna move her real quick, there we go. Alright, you know there's the glow clock, you notice I had glow [[pickles|cock]]- glow clock in the basement in Cwcville as well.

Oh, you know what, ah, ruh- Crystal's worn her Rosechu outfit long enough.

[''Tries to change her outfit'']

Oops. I guess I can't do that yet. Well, never mind.

[''Goes upstairs'']

Anyway, moving on.

[''Leaves house'']

Before we take a tour of the city, I'mma tell you how to make a f- how you make a fun profit with the e-Reader. I'll check the bulletin board.

[''Checks the bulletin board'']

Ah, that's an oldie.

[''Walks to the Train Station'']

Anyway, 'course, there's the Train Station, I told you earlier about that in Cwcville. There's Rosey's mug. You see no statue cuz, she hasn't paid her debt off. That's why we're going to do this with Crystal. Oh, give me a second would ja, I got to do something real quick.

[''A few seconds pass'']

I'm having my Game Boy and my Wavebird at the same time. That's why I put it over there too.

I use my uh, SP as well here. You know, ah, my funds uh, right here, right? Help my funds. I'm gonna- show you guys something real quick- I use my Game Boy Advance SP to help me out here, since you know, the Digimon deal. Not only that, but, the noise it makes, helps me, uh, clarify, whether I uh, got the card read right. I usually do it ten at a time, I'll tell- elaborate about that more later. But I'm gonna do this on purpose, uh, swipe it awkwardly.

Oops, I musta goofed up. Anyway, gonna try that again, see and ah uh, hear the noise that makes.

Oh, that's right, cuz, ya see, I uh, prepared in advance by, uh, [''Clears throat''] you know, showing you showing my profit.

By goin' on ahead and takin' care of the first set of thirty cards out of 63 that I own so far. Cuz like I said, do it ten at a time. By anyway, ah,

[''Exits Post Office'']

[''Sighs'']

Let me just go ahead an uh, show you how you make a nice little profit. Okay, first step you uh, swipe the first ten cards, right? Cuz that's the maximum you can hold in your mailbox. Open your mailbox, get your ten letters into your hold there. And then you just, ah, grab and drop it to the first ten slots. By the way, rule of thumb, elaborate earlier with the five down here. Cuz you know, when you ah, sell your items to Tom, it usually ends up on the first item, and you- that, that way you have these guys on the bottom, they will not get in the way, you won't have to move the uh, hand.

So anyway, uh, we're gonna go to the Nook Shop. There's Iggy again, gonna play with his ball. Like I said, I haven't gotten that far here yet, in Cwc City.

[''Enters Nook Shop'']

There's old Tom. I've taken care of all my uh, errands, like ah, Chris and the little Sonichu I showed you back there. Anyway, we're going to do some selling.

[''Starts selling things to Nook, some other song from Christian and the Hedgehog Boys in the background'']

Obviously, I don't have sa- much to say at this point. So I'm just going to let you guys listen to the music while I sell.

[About 30 seconds later, he finishes selling, and leaves the store]

Okay, I got more to say. After I uh, sell the uh, first set ten, I get that out of the way. Like I said before, of course I do this with the R button.

[''Starts removing gifts from letters, then deleting the letters'']

I just pick up, and put 'em over there. 'Course, I have precise order, I do it from the first letters- first card swiped to the last card swiped. I usually swipe them in the uh, in order of their card numbers. Cuz ah, that's just the way I do it. Also, I use the uh, ''Animal Crossing'' card that came with the e-Reader,you notice the musical note in the first set. I just count that as card triple zero. Makes a good idea, by the way, according to- by the way, speaking of the e-Reader cards, you guys should really uh, print out some more uh, of series- more of the early series. like series one. Cuz, you know, since I just just started you sh- I really want to collect those. And uh, I really would like if you uh, publish some more of those uh, series ones. I don't care if do like you know, second edition or whatever. But print out more of those cards, please. Anyway, uh, I just click- just [[Mailbag|read the letters real quick and then throw them away]] like junk mail. After I get rid of the presents.

[''Finishes throwing letters away'']

By the way, I hope you guys took note of the uh, amount in the previous deal in the Post Office. Anyway, after I delete the last letters, I open them up.

[''Opening up all his gifts'']

One by one, in an orderly flash- orderly fashion. A'most said orderly flashin'! Anyway...

[''Finishes opening his gifts'']

Let's see, with that done, I head back home.

[''Runs to his mailbox'']

And get the next set of ten I have ready. And then I head back to the Post Office.

[''Runs to Post Office'']

And swipe the next set of ten.

[''Enters Post Office'']

And uh, just to let you know, every fifty- every point over fifty thousand, you should make a deposit. But since I'm a good number at start, I'm not gonna do that. So, uh, after all the uh, e-Reader swipes, you should come up to a very nic-

[''Video cuts out for a second, possibly the result of Chris editing the video so we wouldn't have to wait for him to swipe the e-Reader cards'']

an profable- profitable proposition there. And after ah, swiping all those cards, then a nice grand total there. We can make a very generous donation. Or should I say deposit? The usual fifty-thou.

[''Deposits 50,000 bells'']

Here ya go. No thank you. Well, anyway ah, besides ah, selling those things, those uh, profitable items from the e-Reader cards, if there are any I haven't collected yet, I usually just keep 'em.

[''Exits Post Office'']

(Cuz I like the sound of them?) Like for example, the uh, Pansy models downstairs. And well, since that's over with.

[''Changes shirt'']

She just changed into her regular- her uh, nice warm clothing for the winter. Her ski sweater. So anyway, uh, let's see uh. Oh yes, I guess I should- she shoul- we should give you a tour of Cwc City.

Well, you have seen the uh, Post Office, and the Nu- Nook Shop. But I'll tell you the dump is in the opposite location compared to CWCville. And there it is, the dump. And uh, let's see. There's Money. She used to live in CWCville but she moved here. And there's Sally. She moved here.

[''Checks map'']

I have to check the map every now and then because the different location. Let's see, there's Carmen. [''Sing-song''] Carmen San Diego! Carmen San Diego!... Causing mischief around the world!

Let's see now. Oh yeah, that's Pinky. That's Pinky. There's the Museum. Oh, would you look at this, a hole in the ground. Let's see what's in it.

[''Digs up fossil'']

And it's [[Bob|an antique]]!

Must have missed that one previously. Oh well, I'll just simply write the old Museum a letter. Or not write a letter. Like I sent it to them anyway. [Goes to put away shovel, then changes his mind]

Ah, I best to hold on to that just in case. Let's see. Oh, Katrina's tent, she's here today. And there's Rollo. I think a friend sen- I think of ''Sanford and Son'' everytime I see Rollo. [''Scatman Chris''] Doo-doo-doo-doo-a-rawdl-et-do-do-do-do-alot-dude-alot-do-do-dolot-a-dood-alot-dooo. Do-do.

Speakin' of fr- speakin' of ''Sanford and Sons'', my father an I, we have a relationship like Stanford and Son. He starts more arguments than there are flies in a garbage dump. Anyway, let's see, I took every care of business, and I do not need to talk to Copper, but there's the [[Jerkops|Police Station]].

And what's at the shoreline for that stupid bird, and possibly anymore uh, holes in the ground.

[''Singing'']

There's nothing quite like a hole in the ground, hole in the ground, hole in the ground. There's nothing like a hole in the ground, here is, the lighthouse!

[''Stops singing'']

We got a stone bridge here in the city.

[''Sings again'']

There's nothing like a hole in the ground, a hole in the ground

[''Stops singing'']

Oh, we got two neighbors up here. Let's see. Yeah. There's a, Jeremiah. we got a new neighbor. Yeah, that was Pinky. She moved in today. Anyway, there;s the Tailor Shop. Right here. Already took you there over in Cwc Ci- Cwcville. And well, here's the dock. The island is, uh, we kept it for the ah, kre- for a memorial, we used Tim Timetale's island. As uh, we uh, trans- we exchanges between us- we exchanged it with the original island of Cwc City. Anyway, it's got the Tim Timetale flag on it. So we're not going to bother going there. Anyway, you know the two signs.

[''Goes to Wishing Well'']

Well. That joke never gets old. Anyway, there are two holiday signs, got 'em down here, here in the city. There's Rosey, and we got the Sonichu site logo here as well. There's a uh, shovel tree. That's Buzz. Buzz Lightyear. To infinity, and on your head! Oh, and there's uh, Cashmire. I got a card for Baah-bra. Huh, too bad she ain't here. And uh, I'm not sure, oh wait, yes I'm sure. Yeah, you have seen him, uh, Iggy. He's around here somewhere. I'm not gonna bother. Anyway, here's the Nook Shop, once again. And well, uh, I guess that's it for uh, Cwc City. oh, I got the fishing tourney sign around here somewhere. You've already seen that, so I'm not gonna bother finding it.

Anyway uh, let's see. Oh, I got to mail this uh, fossil off. After I do that, we're going to go back over to Cwcville for uh, closing ceremonies of this great documentary I've put together. you'll find out what that "H.F.A" stands for.

[''Goes inside post office'']

So, stay tuned! And relax.

[''Starts mailing letter'']

In the meantime, here's some music.

[''Plays Yellow is a Mellow Color'']

[''Exits Post office'']

[''Goes and saves his game'']

[''Start screen'']

[''Loads Cwcville'']

[''Finally turns off Yellow is a Mellow Color'']

Welcome back to Cwcville! And we're here for the closing ceremonies, so the uh, documentary of the city of Cwcville and Cwc City in Animal Crossing, [''Raises pitch of voice''] for Nintendo GameCube! But first, I'm gonna tell you a couple of things. Sonichu and Rosechu. [''Burps''] [''Faintly''] Excuse me.
I'm just going to let you know who they are, they're Pokémon. I made them up. They're both Electric-types, alright. Obviously. Sonichu and Rosechu are Pokémon I made up. They're Electric-types. They've got evolution, [[Metonic]] and [[Vamprosa]]. You want pictures, you gotta ask me for them. Also they got baby forms, [[Sonee & Rosey|Sonee and Rosey]], they're cuties. So anyway, if you've missed it the first couple of times.

[''Shows bulletin saying "CWC's Sonichu Site!
http://sonichuchandler.tripod.com/cwcson.htm"'']

Here is one last time. Okay, and uh, to answer the all important question; What is the meaning of "H.F.A"? With the two red eyes. I will tell you. Got that? it means "High Functionally [[Autism]]" because that's what I am, I'm High Functionally Autistic. I may have autism, but since I'm [[honor roll|high functional]], I do all- I can do alot of things. I mean otherwise I wouldn't even do this documentary I'm doing right now.

So let's see, is there anything else I need to cover? Well, I guess not. But anyway, uh, this is the city of Cwcville and there's a- don't forget Sonichu website if you want to go see it. I've been playing video games for as long as I can remember. And listening to music as long as I can remember. So, we're going to end this documentary by obviously leaving. If you want credits, ya have to look at the uh, enclosed letter.

[''Starts saving game'']

But anyway, uh, pu- for in the submission of Nintendo Power. This has been a, [[Chris and his ego|documentary narrated by Christian Weston Chandler]]. Thank you very much, and I hope that you will [[Chris and reality|consider this for publication]]. Bye now.

[''Nintendo logo and title screen. It ends with Chris, from "[[Feel So Lonesome]]", saying "Stop!"'']

[''The video normally ends here, but on other versions of it, this is followed by 5 commercials for the game (likely taken from a promo DVD), and then...'']

[''Shows bulletin reading "For Nintendo Power...A Bonus Feature! Later on...". The character moves towards a golden statue reading "This statue was erected in honor of Crystal's loan repayment!". The character moves around some trees, bushes and the sign board, before moving to the bulletin board, flipping to a new page. Chris types in "Bye-Bye!" and then a happy face. He then throws out the letter, and then moves back to the bonus feature one for a few seconds before the video finally ends.'']

==''Nintendo Power'' article==

''[[Nintendo Power]]''’s May 2004 article on Chris’s documentary covers only Sonichu’s life in Cwcville. The way that the article speaks of Sonichu’s actions, most casual readers would be led to believe that “Sonichu” is the real name of the person who submitted the documentary.

[[Image:CWCSchuCross.jpg|thumb|center]]

===Transcript===

{{quotenews|'''Sonichu’s Cwcville Documentary'''

Simply amazing. There’s no other way to describe what we received from Sonichu of Cwcville—a full video documentary that walked us through his daily life. His opulent manor contained every manner of furniture. Cwcville’s landscape was filled to the bursting point with all the animals who’d moved to his well-tended town. And Sonichu has customized everything about his town—even many villagers have followed his bold trends, wearing the patterns he has created!

''(Image captions)''

*Sonichu has packed the museum with his fads—its bug collection is hopping.
*He often visits Sonichu Island to bring its high-value coconuts to town.
*And he uses the spare hut on the island to store his huge collection of oddities.
*Cwcville is brimming with Sonichu’s patterns, including the popular Poké Ball.}}

==PVCC's news report==

The 26 April 2004 issue of [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|PVCC's]] school newspaper, ''The Forum'', included a news report on the "accomplishments" of then-student Christian Chandler. The first half of the article discusses Chris's OFFICIAL and ORIGINIAL creation, Sonichu, while the second half covers Chris's Animal Crossing Documentary, going so far as to quote ''[[Nintendo Power]]'''s own coverage. Everyone can draw their conclusions of how slow news day it was at the PVCC by comparing how big the ''Nintendo Power'' article was, and how big this article was.

===Transcript===

[[File:391-SchuPVCCArticle.jpg|thumb|center|Meet Sonichu]]

{{quotenews|'''Meet Sonichu''' ''Student featured in "Nintendo Power"''

By Kari Mitchell ''The Forum assistant editor''

Most everyone has a hobby. It may be hard to find free time in between classes, especially with exam week quickly approaching, but PVCC student Christian Chandler, has dedicated many hours to his past time. He is the creator of Sonichu, the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon.

Like Sonic, Sonichu can run at high speeds. "During Super Sonic's battle against the [[Perfect Chaos Monster|Perfect Chaos monster]] (''Sonic Adventure DX'' for Gamecube), Super Sonic was spat out by the monster, and colldied with a by-standing Pikachu," Chandler explained. According to his story, the power from the Chaos Emeralds transformed Pikachu into Sonichu.

The idea for the character came from a project Chandler was assigned his senior year of high school. He was enrolled in a computer graphics class that required him to design a CD cover. His original idea was to put Sonic and Pikachu on the cover, however, both characters are copyrighted. Instead he decided to combine the characters into something all his own. Thus, on March 17, 2000, Sonichu was born.

Over time, Chandler began to mold and expand the life of Sonichu, giving him stories, homemade trading cards, clay figures, a board game, and a [[Sonichu medallion]] with charms, among other things.

Chandler and the world he created for Sonichu were featured in the May 2004 issue of ''Nintendo Power.'' The place was called Cwcville (The "Cwc" prefix are his initials, Christian Weston Chandler). Nintendo Power was apparently impressed with Chandler's work. "Simply amazing. There's no other way to describe what we received from Sonichu of Cwcville - a full video documentary that walked us through his daily life." The documentary, running about an hour, was taped from the Nintendo Gamecube title, ''Animal Crossing''. He dubbed his voice over the sound through a microphone and audio input in his VCR. In the documentary, Chandler covers "basically how I do things in ''Animal Crossing'' as the boy character, Sonichu, in the city of Cwcville." Some of the tasks include using the journal as a monthly diary, making money, customizing the city, and conversing with another ''Animal Crossing'' city. For now, Sonichu remains a hobby in the future, Chandler would like to see Sonichu and his friends as real Pokémon, even having their own Nintendo Gamecube video game title. "I am not really sure what to do in order to do all that," Chandler said, "but for now, Sonichu and I, Christian C., are in Nintendo Power Magazine!"}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[The City of Cwicville Tour!]]|nextlink=[[The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special]]|}}

{{CWC on TV}}

[[Category:Media that has been published in real life]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos before 2007| 2003-11-22]]
[[Category:Videos About or Featuring Farts]]

Animal Crossing Documentary

2024-11-14T02:20:10Z

Anemichu: Minor formatting edit

The '''''[[Animal Crossing]]'' Documentary''' is an hour-long video that was filmed on 22 November [[2003]], and later featured on the ''[[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)]]'' DVD. Here, you can watch 21-year-old [[Chris]] reach the peak of his maturity, as he immerses himself in a video game targeted for kids on one cold November afternoon. Because of how the video is made (gameplay with the player commentating), this could mean Chris created one of the first-ever video {{w|Let's Play|Let's Plays}}. This video is also notable in that Chris submitted it to ''[[Nintendo Power]]'' magazine, and it was actually featured in their May [[2004]] issue.

==Analysis==
The video offers tours of two different ''Animal Crossing'' towns saved on two different GameCube memory cards. The town of [[CWCville]] is home to [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]], who wears a Sonichu outfit. The town of CWC City is home to [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Crystal]], who wears a [[Rosechu]] outfit.

Some of the narration centers around Chris complaining to [[Nintendo]] about his many personal problems. One can only imagine how the hapless ''Nintendo Power'' employee tasked with watching this video felt at hearing Chris [[Honest Content|constantly bring up]] his [[Virgin with rage|virginity]] and [[Love Quest|lack of a girlfriend]]. He expects the company to remember his [[fan]] letters regarding his dreams. He also implies that the company should send him [[Chris and reality|birthday presents]], reissue trading cards that went out of print so Chris can collect them, and adopt his fan characters as official [[Pokémon]]. He also expresses his [[Brand loyalty|distaste]] for [[Sony|the PlayStation and the PS2]], but speaks fondly of many obsolete consoles he owns that weren't made by Nintendo. He also mentions he dislikes a ''{{w|Beyblade: Super Tournament Battle|Beyblade}}'' game because it's "not real" (which is [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 2|disturbing]] in retrospect).

Chris has spent an exorbitant amount of [[Chris and money|money]] on ''Animal Crossing'', purchasing not only the base game (retailing at $49.99) but also a number of relatively obscure hardware add-ons that add functionality to the game, including the Game Boy Advance link cable (MSRP $10.00), the e-Reader (retailing at around $40.00) and numerous e-Reader cards. Chris's propensity for blind brand loyalty and consumerism is on full display here: although the aforementioned e-Reader was maligned by many Nintendo fans and is largely forgotten today, Chris fell for it hook, line and sinker, mentioning that he owns a whopping ''63'' e-Reader cards (which, considering each pack of ''Animal Crossing'' cards included five cards and retailed for $5.00, means that Chris spent a minimum of $60.00 on cards alone, assuming that the leftover 3 cards were freebies that were found loose and not purchased).

[[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys]]' [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (album)|debut album]] is featured prominently, as Chris sings several of the songs aloud and has the CD on repeat playing quietly in the background. "[[Yellow is a Mellow Color]]" plays at least three times in the span of an hour. He also sings along to parts of the game. Much like the boatman Charon ferried the souls of the damned to Hades, a character shuttles Sonichu across a river while Chris sings in the voice that (allegedly) got him fired from [[Wendy's]]. The singing becomes high-pitched gibberish after two stanzas.

There are a few odd moments, like where Chris compares two fighting insects to ''[[I Love Lucy]]'', says a [[Niggos|dark-skinned]] hippopotamus reminds him of ''{{w|Sanford and Son}}'', and talks about his strained relationship with [[Bob Chandler|his father]]. Chris also doesn't mention the {{w|Joy to the World (Hoyt Axton song)|bullfrog character named Jeremiah}}, showing his ignorance of popular [[Chris and music|music]] outside of 90's teen pop and the older music [[Bob Chandler|Bob]] liked. Also, he will gladly [[Chris and work#Chores|pull weeds]] in this game, but not in [[Father Call|real life]].

Chris mentions "profit" from selling in-game items over and over again. This in no way involves real money and is just Chris selling easily-found items dropped by the game to purchase more furniture and crap, which he finds validating. Chris probably enjoys the game because it showers him with rewards for completing simple tasks, none of which are challenging or [[Chris and stress|stressful]].

Chris mentions that his favorite of the NES games available to play in-game is ''{{w|Donkey Kong Jr. Math}}'' because it "really [[Slow-in-the-minds|challenges the mind]] in the math area". The math featured in the game is simple arithmetic that should be well below the average middle schooler's level, much less that of a 21-year-old college student who supposedly graduated high school on the [[honor roll]].

This "[[documentary]]" also provides insight into how Chris projects his own lifestyle onto a video game. His hoarding enters the realm of video games, as he uses his island house to store almost a dozen dressers full of in-game objects. His two houses are full of clutter, his in-game bedrooms look eerily like [[Chris's room|his own]] (right down to a small bed surrounded by clutter), and he refers to every generic "nice" female character as being [[sweetheart|sweet]], and being a genuine [[gal pal|friend]] of his.

This is Chris at his most infantile, immersing himself in a game full of soft animal characters with no conflict or challenge. Throughout the documentary, Chris tells jokes that [[Random access humor|don't make sense in the given context]] and [[Chris and music|plays his poorly dubbed versions of pop songs]]. Note that most of the animals in the game immediately run into their houses whenever Chris tries to go near them.

==Video==
<center>{{Infobox/video
| name=Animal Crossing Documentary
| ytid = 5QtOj7rNFCY
| stardate = 22nd [[November 2003]]
| maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| subject = {{Video games|text}}, {{Website|text}}
| style = {{Comedy|text}}, {{Reason|[[Honest Content|Informative]]}}
| Other = {{Direct Feed|text}}, {{Leaked|[[DVD|Leaked]]}}
| previous = [[The City of Cwicville Tour!#Watch|The City of Cwicville Tour]]
| next = [[The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special#Part 1|The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special]]
}}</center>

===Outline===

{| class="wikitable"
| 00:01-01:24 || Introduction
|-
| 01:25-19:39 || Tour of Cwcville (part 1 of 2)
|-
| 19:40-25:19 || Trip to Cwcville Island
|-
| 25:20-35:24 || Tour of Cwcville (part 2 of 2)
|-
| 35:25-36:44 || Interlude
|-
| 36:45-52:39 || Tour of Cwc City
|-
| 52:40-53:39 || Interlude
|-
| 53:40-55:54 || Conclusion
|}

==Transcription==
[''Throughout the video, the first [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys]] [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (album)|album]] plays throughout in the background, on a loop to cover the video's hour-long length.'']

'''Introduction'''

[''Video begins with the Nintendo GameCube startup logo as Chris sings along to the tune, followed by the Nintendo logo with Chris saying "Nintendo."'']

[00:24]

I love Nintendo! Welcome to my ''Animal Crossing'' for Nintendo GameCube. I am your host. My name is Christian Weston Chandler. I live in [[Ruckersville]], Virginia and [[Chris and English|I is]] [''sic''] 21 years old and I play because I am young at heart. So anyway we are going to take a tour of my ci-ty...in ''Animal Crossing''.

[''Goes to main menu'']

[00:48]

The city's name is CWCville. See, those are my initials CWC. That's why it is spelled that way.

[''Picking menu options'']

[01:01]

And my character's name is Sonichu. You may remember him from, ahh, previous letters I have sent to you guys in the past.

[01:10]

[''Game starts to load town'']

Anyway we are going to get set up now. [''Chris starts singing'']

[''Game is done loading'']

We usually do have a good time.

[1:25]

So anyway, stepping out is my character [[Sonichu]]. He's wearing the [[Chris and fashion|clothes]] with the character on it. Like I said you might remember his face. And there's his actual face.

[''Shows a sign with the face of Sonichu on it'']

You remember the rest of his body you see the whole picture.

And before we get to the daily routines I'm goin' let you...I'm goin' to take you on a tour of my [[house]] as well as uh, as well as you know, uh, a daily routine. We'll take a tour of the town, but first the house. You see this logo here, that is the logo to [[CWC's Sonichu Site!|my website on the internet]]. If you would like to visit, here is the address. I'm going to leave it up for a few seconds.

[''Shows the address to his website for a few seconds'']

[2:02]

Alright, that's enough. Now we're gonna take a [[Tour of Chris's House|tour of my house]].

Turn on the light so you can see better. This is my first floor, obviously. I keep things well organized. I got room to walk around in; I can even dance, wanna see me do I bit?

[''Chris begins to sing'']

[[Yellow Is a Mellow Color|Yellow is a mellow color]] 
Yes it is a mellow color 
Sonichu zaps a lightning 
EEEEEHHHHH mellow color 

[''Chris stops singing'']

Yeah. Course...a...when I, a...do a dance...I usually like to have my uh...audience.

[''Chris puts a wallpaper up on his house, resembling wrestling fans who just witnessed a Stone Cold Stunner.'']

Dodedododododoo. But since it's getting close to [[Christmas]], I have the snowflakes on the wall instead. And I keep it in this closet. So anyway here's a fun thing. This snowman, he teach me how to play piano. And by the way just to let you know in case...a...you can hear the, a...music in the background.

[''"[[So Need a Cute Girl]]" can be heard in the background'']

Those are my karaoke numbers that I actually ma...that I actually made up lyrics to, and I have played and, uh, sang my voice over the originals. So let me give you an example; may I Mister Snowman? "Please go right ahead!" Alright.

[''Chris begins to sing again while Sonichu bangs on the piano, which emits no sound'']

[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|Tell me why]] 
I'm stuck as a 
[[Virgin with rage|Virgin with Rage]]? 
[[Semen#Recycling|Tell me why]] 
I so need a 
Cute Girl my age 
[[Medallions_of_Fail|Tell me why]] 
I never wanna 
Hear you say 
I have a boyfriend!

[''Chris stops singing'']

And that was inspired by a [[Love Quest|real thing]]. By the way that's your website...that is your website isn't it? Nintendo.com, it's a nice place to visit; but we cannot live there. Which brings us up to our next subject...

[''A calendar of November appears on the screen'']

...the [[diary]]. You guys did a good job of it going back and forth within a 12 month radius. By the way, this is my birthday, right here my actual birthday, I was born in 1982. You guys...in case you want to take a note there. OK, that's long enough. So anyway uh, it does make a...not only does it work for a calendar, but it makes for a good monthly journal. As for a monthly journal entry here in November.

[''Chris begins to scroll up and down his journal entry'']

Yeah I tried to get a girlfriend because, I don't have a girlfriend. But I have made up a poem, let you guys read it.

{{quotebox|My dreams of getting a girlfriend was crushed by the medeling [''sic''] [[Mary_Lee_Walsh|"Mary Lee Walsh."]] 
Christian Chandler. 
November 4, 2003 
Saddest Heart in the World 
Lonesome and sad, lonesome and sad, the "Mastermind" is very bad. In efforts of getting a [[Boyfriend-free girl|Boyfriend-Free gal]], that female dog took my only idea for a fall. Heart-broken, sad and very lonely, I'll never remove my virginity. And with Backstreet Boys' tune, I sing my lonesome croon: "Tell me why I'm stuck as a virgin with rage. Tell me why, I so need a...}}

All right. Scroll down a little bit as we go along.

''...cute girl my age. Tell me why, I ain't ever wanna hear you say 'I have a boyfriend.'" And so, deep in dreary thought, a girl was what I sought. A stitch in time, will never remove my...''

It's a very good pro...poem, because I am an artist, as well as a poet. I make a rhyme every time.

''...crying rhyme. I may be destined for loneliness forever, fate is to blame...whatever. I conclude this cry, to say that as long as there are no matching girls, my happiness well runs dry.''

Anyway that's my poem, but in case...a, you didn't notice here. Look right here, "Tell me why, I'm stuck as a virgin with rage." I put my song lyric in here because it was inspired; because I do not have a girlfriend. You know why, cause I have a [[Noviophobia|phobia]] that every girl I talk to she already has a boyfriend.

Right. So anyway moving on with the tour of my house. As you can see I've got- I'm collecting the NES games. I've got most of them down here, and I've got a couple upstairs. One of 'em's fake you know the one I'm talking about, does April 1st strike a bell? But my favorite game is right here.

[''"Would you like to play 
DK Jr MATH?"'']

I like it because...a, it really challenges the mind in the math area and gets your memory fresh there. And by the way, notice the two logos here?

[''Chris is making a motion towards the GameCube and N64 logos'']

It's a good way to welcome the guests, that come into your house. Ol' Nintendo 64 on the left, and GameCube on the right, caught them before an after deal. Oh and look at this, a good little south feng shui here. Of course makes for a good welcome mat. Speaking of feng shui, I've got my red items against the east side, in hopes of getting more NES games; specially that Wario's Woods. By the way, how the heck do you get that game anyway? I mean all you tell us do to is to go to Animal Island. And then what the heck do we do? You should have given us more details, back in the previous issue of uh, the Crossing Guardian.

Speaking of which I've been a long time subscriber. So therefore I've got all their previous issues. And I time travel back and forth when I start ''Animal Crossing'' to collect a few items, but in respect to uh...time traveling back because I missed a few items, I made a new character named "Tim Timetale" and, uh, he time-traveled back and got the remaining items, give them to me, as well as the other character I made up, and, uh, the, uh, the other city in Slot B, which, uh, I'll tell you about that later.

[6:45]

[''Character walks up stairs to the second floor of house'']

Anyway, we're going upstairs. This is my [[Chris's room|bedroom]]. It's a lot of fun, isn't it, because I like to make things fun since, you know, I'm young at heart. And here's a fun joke. Turn on the [[TV]] [''he does, but it just shows static''] sit down and watch TV while I wait t-to get on the [[Internet]]. It's a good way to kill time anyway. Anyway, here's the fake [''brings up caption for the April Fool's NES game, Super Tortimer'']. Sound familiar? Right [''[[sigh|sighs]]'']. Anyway, this is my bed. The harvest bed. Nice choice, isn't it? I'm going to take a quick nap.

[7:17]

[''Character lays down on bed while Chris makes snoring noises too close to the microphone'']

OK. Nap's over. All right. You want to see my music collection? [''Brings up music menu''] It's all good. I got them all courtesy of K.K. Slider. Well, of course, the first one was a freebie from the e-Reader card. "Swipe, Swipe, Swipe". Anyway, here's the fan and the Mario Brothers stuff. Oh, and uh you notice what time it is? It's 1:15. Good time to start. In the afternoon.

[7:48]

[''Character walks down stairs to first floor of house'']

Anyway, now we're going down to the basement.

[''Character walks down stairs to the basement of house'']

Let me just turn on the lights. I keep my models down here. It's a nice little aero fa [sic] models, and I leave enough room for me to walk around in. Well, that's a cute joke.

''"Hey. Stop. You're under arrest."'' 
''"What for?"'' 
''"For, uh, being the black market, you red fox."'' 
''"Ah, geez."'' 

And I got both houses. Yeah, I scored that high with the HRA. Notice this train? I wonder where it's headed to. It's probably headed over to the memory card in Slot B. I'll tell you about that city later. Anyway. This is where I do my cooking. If, uh, if you can ever do your cooking in ''Animal Crossing'' for Nintendo GameCube. I have that DVD. And this is the fridge. I could store my food in there, but I can't. What? Does it have a padlock on it or something? Oh, look. Here's my phone. Let's make a phone call. [''Pulls up phone menu, calling the Dial-a-Psychic''] Hello? Thank you. Good advice. Hey. Let's have a seat on this thing. I like this thing. Listen to this. [''Character sits on the couch and it [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|makes a fart noise]]'']. Let me do that again. [''Character again jumps on the farting couch''] One more time. [''Character again jumps on farting couch with predictable results''] OK. That's enough. Too much fun and [[Random-access humor|you'll die laughing]].

[9:04]

[''Character walks up stairs to first floor of house'']

So anyway, that's my house. Let me just turn off the lights before I leave.

[''Character walks out the front door of house'']

Alright, now where going to go through my daily routines. As well as a tour of the town.

[''Pause menu pops up'']

You notice I've got an empty inventory. And by the way, here's a good rule of thumb. Keeping my shovel, net, pole, axe, and letters here on the bottom row. You know why? I'll tell you bout that when we get to the Nook shop. Anyway, I usually check my mail; what do you know I got three presents. Let's see what this one is though. [[Bob]].

''How ARE you, Sonichu? Well now, I bet your bottom Bell you didn't expect me to cut out and split town, huh? Nope, I shocked the world! I'm turning over a new leaf- see you on the flip side! Laters, Bob''

Oh I guess he moved out, oh well.

[''Sonichu proceeds to throw out poor Bob's letter, then collect his gifts from the remaining letters'']

Anyway, let's see what we got from the, uh, probably from the museum; because I dig up those fossils and uh...I sell them. Makes a nice profit.

[''Sonichu throws away all three letters'']

I just quickly uh read through them and then throw them away. You know like...junk mail! You could also say pop-ups if they had "x's" on em.

[''Sonichu begins to open his gifts'']

See what we got here, A dinosaur track, a Tricera tail, and a dinosaur egg. Well that'll make a nice profit. By the way, in case you missed it the first time I'll put it up again.

[''Once again shows the address to his website'']

Ok you got it, alright now. Before we head to Nook's shop which will be the last stop on the tour; we go- we're gonna take the rest of the tour here. Alright let's see. Well this is the train station. But I travel to the other city which I'll tell you about now. The name of the city is CWCcity. Spelled C-W-C-c-i-t-y, we'll visit there later, but not by train of course. It'll be a hou-It'll be a run by the, uh, character named [[Crystal_Weston_Chandler_(sister)|Crystal]], C-r-y-s-t-a-l, when we get there. All right. Oh, look at this, a hole in the ground.

[''opens the menu to equip his golden shovel'']

Yeah, you see, sometimes there's an item in CWCcity. I don't have it here in CWCville because I have CWCville a lot longer than CWCcity. I bring stuff from CWCcity over here.

[''he digs up the buried item - it's a folding chair'']

'Cause obviously I did not collect this one yet. I got a good memory.

[''Sonichu screws up and digs another hole; he cleans both of them up'']

And also, you know, I got a good taste for music because I grew up on music. So anyway let's move on with- oh, you notice this [a golden statue of Sonichu]? You know why this is here?

[''This statue was erected in honor of Sonichu's full loan repayment!'']

I paid my debt. And this is Sonichu's mug again, right next to the master.

[''Sonichu runs past a sign reading "H.F.A." with two almost invisible red eyes'']

Oh, look at this. H.F.A. And very mean eyes. Must mean something bad. ...I know what it means. I'll tell you about it at the end of the documentary here. Uh, the city of CWCville and CWCcity, or otherwise all the deal [?] in ''Animal Crossing'' for Nintendo GameCube, in a nutshell.

[''Sonichu enters the acre with the post office on it'']

So anyway, here's the post office, do my mailing and such and the e-Reader swipes. By the way there's a good way to profit from the e-Reader, I'll tell you about it in CWCcity.

[''Sonichu comes across a shining ring in the ground'']

Oh, what do you know! A money spot. I'll just dig up the thousand bells.

[''Sonichu pulls a shovel out of his inventory and digs up the money sack'']

Yep, thousand bells, just bury that up. Mmm, drag it up there. Use the R button to quickly pick up the items.

[''Sonichu enters the acre with the dump in it, he enters it'']

Anyway, here's the dump. I come here first, pick up the- whatever items I want every time I start ''Animal Crossing''. Hmm, got a shirt, what do we have here? A plant. I's have picked up a pothos before so I know it's a plant.

[''Sonichu starts wandering into some acres filled with trees'']

I don't really use plants in my house you n-n-noticed, except for that Christmas Tree but that's for, you know, the holidays. Anyway she's around here, I want to show you my favorite character that I kind of got to know from the start.

[''Sonichu finds his way into an acre with a house on it'']

Oop, she just went in. So let's go say hello.

[''Sonichu follows some green squirrel into a house and rams into it'']

Yeah uhm, uhm, would you come out here please?

[''Sonichu walks back into the center of the room and back into the green squirrel, he pushes it into a corner'']

Mmm... Darnit, I can't see her but anyway uh, I think you recognize her. Oh here we go a little bit. Yeah Mint, she's a sweety.

[''Sonichu talks to Mint about some random crap'']

She gave me a birthday present on my 21st birthday when I time-traveled back. Talk to me!

[''Mint rambles on about how it's cold out and how winter's coming'']

Well, what did ya expect? It's November.

[''Mint asks Sonichu if he has a heater'']

Yeah I got a heater in the basement.

[''Mint jokingly mocks him about turning on heaters during November'']

[Chris chuckles] Yea.

[''Mint says something about how it's going to get colder'']

That's right. Well, I'll see you later Minty, you're a sweety.

[''Sonichu leaves Mint's house'']

Anyway that's uhh all so on the trip. We'll take a look at all the other colorful characters we have around here.

[''The town map comes up, different acres are examined'']

Also uh every time I keep track of the-uh map so that I can see if anyone new came in. Oh, we got a new neighbor, Bertha. I haven't noticed her before. So she's obviously new. So anyway uh, let's move on.

[''Sonichu starts running through the woods and comes across some kangaroo'']

Here's another character I grew up with. Actually she moved in, and lived here most of the time. Marcy. And now she's wearing a Sonichu shirt. Sonichu is very popular in CWCville.

[''Sonichu heads south to an acre with some green mouse's house in it'']

There's Anicotti, she just went in.

[''Sonichu heads west and finds some horse's house'']

And there's Elmer. He just went in, he's one of the senior citizens around here too. I say that because he's lived here- by the way our ne- our city pe- fruit is a peach. But I've grown a lot of orange, pears n such.

[14:15]

[''Sonichu heads west and finds a white cat, she says something about how CWCville is amazing'']

Oh whaddya' know, it's that girl from the train.

[''He talks to Blanca'']

I draw her face every time, but when I'm in a hurry I just color it, the whole thing, and she just looks like a... ''Blank face''. But I gave her a face last time.

[''Sonichu starts to head out of the acre but turns around and runs back in, [[Yellow Is a Mellow Color]] begins to play in the background. Chris's "singing" is clearly audible'']

Oh, there was another character up here on the hill.

[''Sonichu heads to a goat's house by a river'']

And she just came out, Chevre. What do you know, she's wearing Elmer's clothes.

[''Sonichu runs out of that acre back into the woods'']

Anyway, moving on with the tour.

[''Sonichu comes to some giant tree with a fountain thing in front of it, Chris mistakes it for a well. Some billboards are to the right of it'']

Well, [Chris chortles] good joke. Anyway I also, you know I like to use the billboards, put my signs up. There's my Sonichu site logo, there's Sonichu's mug. I got two here side by side represent the holidy and such. Yea here we got your corn that you got from the previous issue and I drew this leaf.

[''It doesn't look like a leaf'']

Obviously for Thanksgiving and the harvest festival.

[''A blue bear walks into the video'']

Oh, look there's Groucho. He's wearin' a Sonichu site shirt. Let's say hello.

[''Sonichu starts speaking with Groucho'']

Entertain me.

[''Groucho bitches about his mom and fruit'']

A fruit huh?

[''Groucho offers Sonichu an apple, Sonichu accepts'']

I-I'll take one. Yeah, it makes a nice little profit when you talk to them and most of the time it happens from the jobs.

[''Sonichu walks east and comes across a green lion's house'']

So anyway. Yeah, here's Leopold, he moved in a long time-

[''Sonichu makes his way to a green rooster's abode'']

Here's Hank, he's one of the senior citizens around here also. [unintelligible]

[''Sonichu runs to a teal hippo's house'']

Let's go see our new neighbor. Oh, here she is. She must be Bertha. Hello Bertha.

[''Sonichu talks to Bertha, Bertha talks about how nice the town is, etc.'']

It is a nice place. Heh you're scatterbrained. Yeah, okay, well see you around!

[''Sonichu heads south towards a museum'']

[Chris Grunts] Here's the Museum.

[''Sonichu heads inside'']

Let's go look at the exhibits.

[''We see the inside of the museum as Sonichu heads toward the insect section'']

First, we'll look at the bug exhibit.

[''Sonichu is now inside the insect section'']

I caught most of the bugs.

I'll show 'ya. This is my bug collection, I caught them all one-by-one and donated them one-by-one.

[[I Got A Fish|Wanna' see my number of fish?]] Not as much. Not as much. Anyway, uh, all the bugs are just runnin' around here. Hey, whaddya' know, we got a couple- few bugs on the trees here. Two of them are fighting. Well, that's funny, like [[cats|Lucy and Desi]]. [[I Love Lucy|I love Lucy]].

Anyway, uh, nebit, cebit, zibit, the fish exhibit. Yeah, you can see here I caught those fish and I donated them. Hmm, this one is empty. I guess it's waiting for a kind donation. Yeah, here's a bunch of fish; here's some more fish. One fish, two fish, red fish, blue fish.

Alright, anyway, moving on with the tour the museum, take a look at the paintings. I haven't gotten them all yet, but, uh, I got a few. Here's a nice one, it's strange though. sw- why- I gu- why I'd call it a strange painting. Yeah, some of them are- most of them are just waiting for a kind donation, but I got this one from a swipe. Your uh, Common Painting, from Ol' Boots. Well, my favorite painting around here is, uh, right here. Washington crossing the Delaware, but you guys call it the Classic Paining.

Anyway, moving on. We're gonna' check out what I worked hard for and actually got done, the fossil section. All the fossils, right here; all of them! Dug them all up! Though the last one I completed and the last one I picked up was the pterodactyl. All I needed was the right wing and that completed the pterodactyl. As well as the fossil exhibit; and who's my favorite? It's obvious.

Anyway- oh, you can actually see a bug in that amber, y'know? That right there, I wonder what kind of bug that is. I think it was in the, uh, insect thing. Oh well, forget it. Anyway, moving on with the tour, leaving the museum. See you later, sleeping Blathers.

Well, here's another neighbor, Cookie; She just went in. Alright. Well, anyway, uh, since we're, uh, down here, I'm gonna' tell you a couple of things. This is a- here's a- here's the dock, right here, and there's the sea turtle. Of course I usually would check around the, uh, beach lines for old Gulliver, that sailor bird. You should have called him Pelliper like the Pokémon. You notice these two signs here? You need a Game Boy Advance to get started, but when you come back, welcome to the Gamecube.

Anyway, let's go visit the island real quick, 'cuz I'll show you something fun you could do on the island. I use my Game Boy Advance SP but I do have a GBA as well. Well, I use the, uh, SP for, uh, y'know the e-Reader because y'know my Digimon players. It's, uh, easier to hold as swiping as, as compared to the, uh, GBA, the original.

[''Chris starts singing Kappa's song'']

Yeah- this [[Sweetheart|sweet young lass]], so full of spunk an' sass, over tea, she tells me I gots no class. I ain't no [[Pedofork|crummy creep]] who lives in [[14 Branchland Court|trash heaps]]! I'm just one old sea-hun who needs some [[Crash into slumber|sleep]]. *unintelligible noises* No, I do not. *rhythmic unintelligible noises* Woooh! I know, the singing annoys me too. I just mock it, and that's- that's why I kinda' have this thing on mute anyway. I listen to my music... every time I play. I actually turn it off right after we- just after we- just as we leave the, uh, bridge there.

So, anyway, this is my island, Cwcville island. Looket all these coconuts here, "In the tropical seas with the coconut trees, we will look and see, coconut." Fine little way to make a profit. Here's Flash. "Troz." I gave him that expression, like ''{{w|Pinky and the Brain}}''. So, let's say hello.

''[Flash asks for Sonichu's [[Fashion|rugby shirt]]]

I'll let you have it, 'cause [[Muscle bra|I don't need it]]. It doesn't look too bad on you.

Anyway, here's a fun way to make a profit, a'course, you need the Gameboy Advance for this. You shake the trees, you grab the coconuts. I put them all over her- I gathered them all over here, in this area, and then I just drag them over to the bird. And after the first three coconuts, he gives me money. And I just all put 'em back in the proper place around here. And when I come back to the island, Gamecube version, instead of the uh, on the Gamecube instead of in the Gameboy Advance, after uploading I collect the money, go as high as 30,000 bells, which is very nice.

Anyway, I'll show you what you can do on the house in the island.

[''Goes inside the house'']

I use mine as storage for the, uh, extras items I, uh, don't have room for, at home. Yeah, I got a bunch. 'Course, I got mostly wallpaper and shirts, that's why I got all these dressers.

[''Looks inside a dresser'']

But I've gotten all the uh, carpets from, uh, Sahara. She was here yesterday. Wel- How do I know? I usually keep track, I made a special sticker with my Game Boy Camera and I just uh, whenever there's a holiday or ah, when there's a special event as noted by the Copper, I note it on the calendar with one of those special stickers, or write it down whether it's for Cwcville or Cwc City.

[''Exits the house'']

Anyway, we're going to leave the island. See you later Flash! Troz! Or Zort!

[''Goes to Kapp'n so he can leave'']

Hey Kapp'n. Yeah I'm leavin'. No thank you.

[''Gets on the boat'']

Oh, by the way Sonichu's mug is the flag of the island. Obviously. Don't worry, this time I'm not going to imitate his singin'.

Instead I'll talk about something random. [[Sonic the Hedgehog]].

Oh, by the way, those two characters at the tailor shop, Mabel and Sabel, are they hedgehogs or porcupines, cuz I dunno. They look like hedgehogs, and or porcupines, but ah, I'm not sure which are they. But either way, if they're hedgehogs, you got my vote on Sonic. Speaking of which, you should have make- ''Sonic Heroes'' should be Nintendo Gamecube exclusive, because [[Xbox]] and [[Sony|PlayStation 2]], my opinion is the same as yours, they both stink. Yeah, I do not even own them, I do not even want them, and that goes double for the PS One as well.

But if you want to know my game systems, I've had my Gamecube for about almost a year and a half now, got it on May thirty-first, twenty o'two. I got your SNES, Nintendo 64, NES, I got the Genesis 301, with the uh, original Genesis, 32X and Sega CD, as well as Sega Dreamcast, and a Sega Saturn. So I've got mostly all of them, I've been a Sonic fan forever, and that's why I'm glad that Sonic came to Nintendo.

[''Arrives back at Cwcville'']

By the way, you all may remember, that I sent you guys a letter, talking about my dream of Sonic on Game Boy, well you go on my website, check the uh, about the author section, you'll see the ''[[Nintendo Power]]'' magazine cover I made up just for the occasion.

Anyway, welcome back to the Gamecube, let's move on with the tour, shall we? Anyway, we're gonna check the island. Oh, Lighthouse, oh will look at this, there's a weed, I pick weeds, keeps my town clean, as well as uh, Cwc City.

Oh, here's the other billboard I don't kn-know if I've shown you, [[Pokémon|Magikarp]]. that's for the fishing tourney, I drew a Magikarp just for it. Yeah, that's a Magikarp, I didn't have room for a Gyarados.

So, way, ah, here's the Tailor Shop. I got a Game Boy Advance right here as well because, you know, I can use my Gameboy Advance here. So let's go in and see what I got on display.

[''Enters Able Sisters shop'']

Yeah I mean what are they, hedgehogs or porcupines, cuz I can't tell. Anyway, I got Sonichu an Ro-, I got Sonichu right here. Oh, and by the way, this is his girlfriend, you want to know what her name is? [[Rosechu]]. See how that's spelled? Yeah, but you'll see- you'll probably see her and her body on the uh, letter that's included with the VHS here. So anyway, that's her favorite flower, called the Zapbud. Oh, and there's my Sonichu site logo, there's you acc- that you featured in ''Nintendo Power''. And a nice (swipe?) for the Poké Ball, as well as Star Fox emblem.

[''Opens up his saved patterns'']

Here, let me show you the uh, rest of my uh, patterns. Most of them I put together. There's Sonic, right there. And this is Sonichu's evil twin, [[Blake|Black Sonichu]]. I made the Mario as uh, kinda like, you know, the ''Nintendo Power''. Duh. If you guys had a shirt already, and the uh, game, that's from me and then you'll find out later. Oh, because [[It will never end|Spider-Man]] was in town recently, I was inspired. An here's Old Glory. Let's see. Yeah, these are the uh, older patterns I uh, kinda picked up from the shirts as much. And these are patterns I put together myself, there's the Magikarp, and there are others, like you got from ''Nintendo Power'', like the corn, [[the Moon]], groovy. Groovy! I call it groovy. There's the mushroom and the mug. Oh, I got something ready for Christmas, you know, you may notice the wreath back there. Let's see, yeah, here the uh, swiped images. Ah, by the way, you remember Tim Timetrail, that's his logo right there, I call it Time Travel, it's got his name written on there, Time- Tim Timetrail.

Could you excuse me for a minute, I've got an itch in my eye. [''A few seconds pause''] Alright. Anyway, that's taken care of. Let's see, I guess.

[''Selects Time Travel shirt and moves it around'']

What'd I do that for? I'm putting it back. Anyways that's-a, images I got so far.

[''Talks to Mabel'']

No, no thank you, we got nothing. So I'll see you all later. Or ah, another day, somewhat. Hey, I think that looks uh-familiar, what Mabel's sewing up, or's that Sabel? I think that's the noodle design.

[''Exits Able Sisters shop'']

Anyway, moving on. Another weed, well what do you know about that. I usually like to run, it ke-keeps me going faster. Oh, by the way, Puck lives here.

Oh, what do you know, a hole in the ground. I usuall- also usually uh, during my rounds, ["Digs up fossil"] I check for these holes. ["Raises pitch of voice"] And it's an antique! And of course, if I dig up a fossil I just quickly write a letter to the Museum. And I don't have to write anything, so I just get that out of the way real quick. I only keep my shovel in hand cuz there may be a few more holes around here somewhere. Well look at this, another weed.

Anyway, no bird today. So le- let's go see Copper, see if there's anything new at the police station.

[''Talks to Copper'']

Any goings-on? Nothing of import, huh.

It's hard to catch that b- bird you know, the uh, postal character Pete. One time I tried, but then he just flew away. Anyway, you got anything in the police station today Copper? That is uh, anything lost? Oh, we got something? Oh good, I'll go take it, I just usually pick it up and sell it later.

[''Enters police station'']

By the way, as fer the Gulliver, if he has something I have not collected yet, I'll usually keep it. Seeds? Oh well, I'll take it. I could always plant those. Cuz they won't make much of a profit. Anyway, if uh, Gulliver has a gave me something that I already have, I usually just sell it.

[''Exits Police Station'']

Makes a nice profit. Uh anyway, let's plant these flowers. Uh, here's a good place.

[''Plants flowers'']

Alright, what do you know, red tulips.

Anyway uh, there's ah, what's her name. Oh yeah, Portia. Anyway, uh, let's see. Oh yeah, there's Leigh right there.

Oh by the way, you know for Mint? I got her card as well, her ''Animal Crossing'' card. Oh yeah, Chuckles! He likes to wear belt buckles! [[Random Access Humor|Rhyme joke]]. So anyway, uh, moving a little north. Here's the uh, Nook Shop. I got it the best, obviously. But if it gets any better, I'll be surprised. So anyway, uh, let's go inside.

[''Enters Nook's Shop'']

See what see what look lik- See what old Nook has today. [''Sighs'']. Oh, I got to sell these items, I usually do that, I sell him the items.

[''Starts selling things to Nook'']

Items I don't need. Those fossils make a nice little profit, espeg- especially the uh, one that's not within the top five. Whoops. I pressed the B button by mistake.

[''Continues to sell, and starts to hum'']

Doops, I goofed. Yeah, foreign fruits, 500. Although the peaches only get you 100 here. By the way, same fruit in Cwc City, it's a pear. Oh, and I need a sign anyway, so I'll just go ahead and get one of those.

[''Buys sign, clicks through Nook's dialogue about using the sign, and starts humming'']

Anyway, we're going upstairs.

[''Goes upstairs'']

What do ya know, we got the gruesome twosome. They're a comical pair. Ugn, let's see, a blue dresser. Uhh, iris table, refrigerator. Yes, I got this refrigerator already, so I don't need it. I already got the water bird. I've seen those shirts before. Ugn, look at all of these two, they chase me around wherever I go, like I'm some sort kind of [[Autism|nut]] or something. Watch this.

[''Chris makes odd noises that might be mistaken for humming, as he runs around the store and watches the salesman chase him. Sometimes art does imitate real life'']

Almost caught me there. Okay, I'm leaving.

[''Goes downstairs'']

Let's see, was there any other business I need? Oh, I guess I need more paper. So I'll get a sheet, get a pack.

[''Buys paper'']

That's quick, I just pick a random style and just go with that. By the way, in case you're wondering about those button noises, I got the microphone taped to the uh, Gamecube Wavebird here.

Anyway, I'll show you something you can do with the raffle tickets you pick up from here.

[''Exits Nook's Store'']

Instead of making a [[Tour of Chris's House|mess in my house]], I bury them right here, next to the Nook Shop. It's a good place to locate them. So when I'm ready at the end of the month, I just pick up as many as I can hold.

[''Digs up raffle ticket, then buries it again'']

I'm just going to put it back, because it ain't November 30th yet. Oh I guess I don't need this shovel anymore.

[''Puts away shovel'']

Now I'm going to make use of this uh, sign here, the way I should have long time ago, because I didn't think about it. It's already been done in Cwc City, but... Right here by the Post Office, you can use your GBA, oh, well that's a bad place for it. I'm picking it back up. Oh what do you know, another weed.

[''Pulls weed'']

Must of missed that earlier. Anyway, you may post a design, Gameboy Advance, whoops.

[''Picks up sign accidentally'']

What'd I do that for, I'm puttin' it back.

[''Puts it back and adds Gameboy design again'']

There we go. [''Burps''] Excuse me. Hm, I've got well over fifty thousand, so I'm going to make a deposit.

[''Enters Post Office'']

It's ny- It's a good idea to- that you guys did have when you made this thing not only a post office. Oh, I got to mail off that fossil anyway. And I don nee- And it's a good idea to not only you make this into a post office but a bank, saves ya a building. So anyway, see, let's make a deposit. One, two, three, four, five.

[''Deposits 50,000 bells'']

Seven hundred and fifty thousand. It's good saved. I made most of my money from the e-Reader swipes, which I'll tell you about that in Cwc City.

[''Exits Post Office'']

Anyway, uh, lets see. I guess that's it for Cwcville. You guys will be back later. And that- And when you come back, I'll tell you about this sign here. [''Sign saying "H.F.A"'']

Anyway, I'm going home, and I'm gonna save. You may save, Mister Gyroid.

[''Goes inside the house to save, hums a bit'']

You may save and quit.

[''Noise in the background, possibly the radio'']

[''Chris begins to sing''] Do-do-do-do-do-do-do, hey mellow color! Yellow is a mellow color, yes it is. [''Chris stops singing'']

Okay. see you in Cwcville- I mean Cwc City.

[''Title screen'']

At this time, I switched the memory cards. Cuz, ah, I got Cwcvville currently in Slot A, and Cwc City in Slot B. I'm switching the two, putting City in Slot A and Ville in Slot B. So now I'm pressin' the start button.

And here's a resident, Iggy. Here you got- get that down. Cwc City, that's the name of the city right there.

[''Yellow Is A Mellow Color playing faintly in the background'']

And that's her name, Crystal, make sure you get that down. Alright, getting things ready. Have a blast, huh, well that's a fun thing to say.

[''Cwc City is loaded, and starts'']

Anyway ah, this is Crystal. She's wearing the uh, Rosechu look. There's a Zapbud on the door, I got Sonichu- Rosechu's mug right here. [''A sign with Rosechu's face on it''] Yeah, an her ensemble, but let's take a tour of her house first.

[''Goes inside the house'']

It ain't much since, uh, she basically got started, but she's almost done paying off her debt to old Nook. There's your website again. [''A Nintendo bench with their website on it''] Oh look, there's the R-Wing, launching into the uh, Super Mario Brother's World. [''The wallpaper is from Mario'']

Which reminds me, I got to get those two boxes to those two passwords later. Anyway, here's her diary. She got started only on November twelfth. Sonichu got started on October twenty-fourth. Anyway let's see, what else have we got here. Yeah, I got the two logos. Well would you look at that, I got them in the wrong place.

[''Starts moving around the logos'']

Oh well, I'll just move 'em. I didn't notice that before, I got 'em in the wrong place. Well that's no problem. I'll just quickly move them around. Hm, they make it loo- You guys make it look tough to move things around, but actually it's not. Let's see what time it is. Oh, it's one forty-five, huh? Well, it's getting close to being later in the afternoon.

There's her tree, she's getting ready for Christmas too. Let's take a quick trip upstairs.

[''Goes upstairs'']

She got her NES games she got collected up here. A plain old falsehood right there, Super Tortimer. Why'd you guys make that game up anyway? It's so- It's stupid. Cuz it's fake. Anyway, here's a thing. I got lucky and found this. I think I dug it up. Oh-no, wait a minute, I got it from Redd, long time ago. Oh, here's her harvest bed. I got a couple empty tables for- getting ready for a couple more NES games. [''Sighs'']

[''Goes downstairs'']

Anyway uh,

[''Continues down to the basement'']

Her basement isn't sa- as busy as uh, Cwcville, but she's got a few models down here. A couple of tracks models. Oh, there's the Moon. You guys made that thing really big you know, it's too big for me, if you ask my opinion.

Huh, Katrina's a little off, I'm just gonna move her real quick, there we go. Alright, you know there's the glow clock, you notice I had glow [[pickles|cock]]- glow clock in the basement in Cwcville as well.

Oh, you know what, ah, ruh- Crystal's worn her Rosechu outfit long enough.

[''Tries to change her outfit'']

Oops. I guess I can't do that yet. Well, never mind.

[''Goes upstairs'']

Anyway, moving on.

[''Leaves house'']

Before we take a tour of the city, I'mma tell you how to make a f- how you make a fun profit with the e-Reader. I'll check the bulletin board.

[''Checks the bulletin board'']

Ah, that's an oldie.

[''Walks to the Train Station'']

Anyway, 'course, there's the Train Station, I told you earlier about that in Cwcville. There's Rosey's mug. You see no statue cuz, she hasn't paid her debt off. That's why we're going to do this with Crystal. Oh, give me a second would ja, I got to do something real quick.

[''A few seconds pass'']

I'm having my Game Boy and my Wavebird at the same time. That's why I put it over there too.

I use my uh, SP as well here. You know, ah, my funds uh, right here, right? Help my funds. I'm gonna- show you guys something real quick- I use my Game Boy Advance SP to help me out here, since you know, the Digimon deal. Not only that, but, the noise it makes, helps me, uh, clarify, whether I uh, got the card read right. I usually do it ten at a time, I'll tell- elaborate about that more later. But I'm gonna do this on purpose, uh, swipe it awkwardly.

Oops, I musta goofed up. Anyway, gonna try that again, see and ah uh, hear the noise that makes.

Oh, that's right, cuz, ya see, I uh, prepared in advance by, uh, [''Clears throat''] you know, showing you showing my profit.

By goin' on ahead and takin' care of the first set of thirty cards out of 63 that I own so far. Cuz like I said, do it ten at a time. By anyway, ah,

[''Exits Post Office'']

[''Sighs'']

Let me just go ahead an uh, show you how you make a nice little profit. Okay, first step you uh, swipe the first ten cards, right? Cuz that's the maximum you can hold in your mailbox. Open your mailbox, get your ten letters into your hold there. And then you just, ah, grab and drop it to the first ten slots. By the way, rule of thumb, elaborate earlier with the five down here. Cuz you know, when you ah, sell your items to Tom, it usually ends up on the first item, and you- that, that way you have these guys on the bottom, they will not get in the way, you won't have to move the uh, hand.

So anyway, uh, we're gonna go to the Nook Shop. There's Iggy again, gonna play with his ball. Like I said, I haven't gotten that far here yet, in Cwc City.

[''Enters Nook Shop'']

There's old Tom. I've taken care of all my uh, errands, like ah, Chris and the little Sonichu I showed you back there. Anyway, we're going to do some selling.

[''Starts selling things to Nook, some other song from Christian and the Hedgehog Boys in the background'']

Obviously, I don't have sa- much to say at this point. So I'm just going to let you guys listen to the music while I sell.

[About 30 seconds later, he finishes selling, and leaves the store]

Okay, I got more to say. After I uh, sell the uh, first set ten, I get that out of the way. Like I said before, of course I do this with the R button.

[''Starts removing gifts from letters, then deleting the letters'']

I just pick up, and put 'em over there. 'Course, I have precise order, I do it from the first letters- first card swiped to the last card swiped. I usually swipe them in the uh, in order of their card numbers. Cuz ah, that's just the way I do it. Also, I use the uh, ''Animal Crossing'' card that came with the e-Reader,you notice the musical note in the first set. I just count that as card triple zero. Makes a good idea, by the way, according to- by the way, speaking of the e-Reader cards, you guys should really uh, print out some more uh, of series- more of the early series. like series one. Cuz, you know, since I just just started you sh- I really want to collect those. And uh, I really would like if you uh, publish some more of those uh, series ones. I don't care if do like you know, second edition or whatever. But print out more of those cards, please. Anyway, uh, I just click- just [[Mailbag|read the letters real quick and then throw them away]] like junk mail. After I get rid of the presents.

[''Finishes throwing letters away'']

By the way, I hope you guys took note of the uh, amount in the previous deal in the Post Office. Anyway, after I delete the last letters, I open them up.

[''Opening up all his gifts'']

One by one, in an orderly flash- orderly fashion. A'most said orderly flashin'! Anyway...

[''Finishes opening his gifts'']

Let's see, with that done, I head back home.

[''Runs to his mailbox'']

And get the next set of ten I have ready. And then I head back to the Post Office.

[''Runs to Post Office'']

And swipe the next set of ten.

[''Enters Post Office'']

And uh, just to let you know, every fifty- every point over fifty thousand, you should make a deposit. But since I'm a good number at start, I'm not gonna do that. So, uh, after all the uh, e-Reader swipes, you should come up to a very nic-

[''Video cuts out for a second, possibly the result of Chris editing the video so we wouldn't have to wait for him to swipe the e-Reader cards'']

an profable- profitable proposition there. And after ah, swiping all those cards, then a nice grand total there. We can make a very generous donation. Or should I say deposit? The usual fifty-thou.

[''Deposits 50,000 bells'']

Here ya go. No thank you. Well, anyway ah, besides ah, selling those things, those uh, profitable items from the e-Reader cards, if there are any I haven't collected yet, I usually just keep 'em.

[''Exits Post Office'']

(Cuz I like the sound of them?) Like for example, the uh, Pansy models downstairs. And well, since that's over with.

[''Changes shirt'']

She just changed into her regular- her uh, nice warm clothing for the winter. Her ski sweater. So anyway, uh, let's see uh. Oh yes, I guess I should- she shoul- we should give you a tour of Cwc City.

Well, you have seen the uh, Post Office, and the Nu- Nook Shop. But I'll tell you the dump is in the opposite location compared to CWCville. And there it is, the dump. And uh, let's see. There's Money. She used to live in CWCville but she moved here. And there's Sally. She moved here.

[''Checks map'']

I have to check the map every now and then because the different location. Let's see, there's Carmen. [''Sing-song''] Carmen San Diego! Carmen San Diego!... Causing mischief around the world!

Let's see now. Oh yeah, that's Pinky. That's Pinky. There's the Museum. Oh, would you look at this, a hole in the ground. Let's see what's in it.

[''Digs up fossil'']

And it's [[Bob|an antique]]!

Must have missed that one previously. Oh well, I'll just simply write the old Museum a letter. Or not write a letter. Like I sent it to them anyway. [Goes to put away shovel, then changes his mind]

Ah, I best to hold on to that just in case. Let's see. Oh, Katrina's tent, she's here today. And there's Rollo. I think a friend sen- I think of Sanford and Son everytime I see Rollo. [''Scatman Chris''] Doo-doo-doo-doo-a-rawdl-et-do-do-do-do-alot-dude-alot-do-do-dolot-a-dood-alot-dooo. Do-do.

Speakin' of fr- speakin' of Sanford and Sons, my father an I, we have a relationship like Stanford and Son. He starts more arguments than there are flies in a garbage dump. Anyway, let's see, I took every care of business, and I do not need to talk to Copper, but there's the Police Station.

And what's at the shoreline for that stupid bird, and possibly anymore uh, holes in the ground.

[''Singing'']

There's nothing quite like a hole in the ground, hole in the ground, hole in the ground. There's nothing like a hole in the ground, here is, the lighthouse!

[''Stops singing'']

We got a stone bridge here in the city.

[''Sings again'']

There's nothing like a hole in the ground, a hole in the ground

[''Stops singing'']

Oh, we got two neighbors up here. Let's see. Yeah. There's a, Jeremiah. we got a new neighbor. Yeah, that was Pinky. She moved in today. Anyway, there;s the Tailor Shop. Right here. Already took you there over in Cwc Ci- Cwcville. And well, here's the dock. The island is, uh, we kept it for the ah, kre- for a memorial, we used Tim Timetale's island. As uh, we uh, trans- we exchanges between us- we exchanged it with the original island of Cwc City. Anyway, it's got the Tim Timetale flag on it. So we're not going to bother going there. Anyway, you know the two signs.

[''Goes to Wishing Well'']

Well. That joke never gets old. Anyway, there are two holiday signs, got 'em down here, here in the city. There's Rosey, and we got the Sonichu site logo here as well. There's a uh, shovel tree. That's Buzz. Buzz Lightyear. To infinity, and on your head! Oh, and there's uh, Cashmire. I got a card for Baah-bra. Huh, too bad she ain't here. And uh, I'm not sure, oh wait, yes I'm sure. Yeah, you have seen him, uh, Iggy. He's around here somewhere. I'm not gonna bother. Anyway, here's the Nook Shop, once again. And well, uh, I guess that's it for uh, Cwc City. oh, I got the fishing tourney sign around here somewhere. You've already seen that, so I'm not gonna bother finding it.

Anyway uh, let's see. Oh, I got to mail this uh, fossil off. After I do that, we're going to go back over to Cwcville for uh, closing ceremonies of this great documentary I've put together. you'll find out what that "H.F.A" stands for.

[''Goes inside post office'']

So, stay tuned! And relax.

[''Starts mailing letter'']

In the meantime, here's some music.

[''Plays Yellow is a Mellow Color'']

[''Exits Post office'']

[''Goes and saves his game'']

[''Start screen'']

[''Loads Cwcville'']

[''Finally turns off Yellow is a Mellow Color'']

Welcome back to Cwcville! And we're here for the closing ceremonies, so the uh, documentary of the city of Cwcville and Cwc City in Animal Crossing, [''Raises pitch of voice''] for Nintendo Gamecube! But first, I'm gonna tell you a couple of things. Sonichu and Rosechu. [''Burps''] [''Faintly''] Excuse me.
I'm just going to let you know who they are, they're Pokémon. I made them up. They're both Electric-types, alright. Obviously. Sonichu and Rosechu are Pokémon I made up. They're Electric-types. They've got evolution, [[Metonic]] and [[Vamprosa]]. You want pictures, you gotta ask me for them. Also they got baby forms, [[Sonee & Rosey|Sonee and Rosey]], they're cuties. So anyway, if you've missed it the first couple of times.

[''Shows bulletin saying "CWC's Sonichu Site!
http://sonichuchandler.tripod.com/cwcson.htm"'']

Here is one last time. Okay, and uh, to answer the all important question; What is the meaning of "H.F.A"? With the two red eyes. I will tell you. Got that? it means "High Functionally [[Autism|Autism]]" because that's what I am, I'm High Functionally Autistic. I may have autism, but since I'm [[honor roll|high functional]], I do all- I can do alot of things. I mean otherwise I wouldn't even do this documentary I'm doing right now.

So let's see, is there anything else I need to cover? Well, I guess not. But anyway, uh, this is the city of Cwcville and there's a- don't forget Sonichu website if you want to go see it. I've been playing video games for as long as I can remember. And listening to music as long as I can remember. So, we're going to end this documentary by obviously leaving. If you want credits, ya have to look at the uh, enclosed letter.

[''Starts saving game'']

But anyway, uh, pu- for in the submission of Nintendo Power. This has been a, [[Chris and Ego|documentary narrated by Christian Weston Chandler]]. Thank you very much, and I hope that you will [[Chris and Reality|consider this for publication]]. Bye now.

[''Nintendo logo and title screen. It ends with Chris, from "[[Feel So Lonesome]]", saying "Stop!"'']

[''The video normally ends here, but on other versions of it, this is followed by 5 commercials for the game (likely taken from a promo DVD), and then...'']

[''Shows bulletin reading "For Nintendo Power...A Bonus Feature! Later on...". The character moves towards a golden statue reading "This statue was erected in honor of Crystal's loan repayment!". The character moves around some trees, bushes and the sign board, before moving to the bulletin board, flipping to a new page. Chris types in "Bye-Bye!" and then a happy face. He then throws out the letter, and then moves back to the bonus feature one for a few seconds before the video finally ends.'']

==''Nintendo Power'' article==

''[[Nintendo Power]]''’s May 2004 article on Chris’s documentary covers only Sonichu’s life in Cwcville. The way that the article speaks of Sonichu’s actions, most casual readers would be led to believe that “Sonichu” is the real name of the person who submitted the documentary.

[[Image:CWCSchuCross.jpg|thumb|center]]

===Transcript===

{{quotenews|'''Sonichu’s Cwcville Documentary'''

Simply amazing. There’s no other way to describe what we received from Sonichu of Cwcville—a full video documentary that walked us through his daily life. His opulent manor contained every manner of furniture. Cwcville’s landscape was filled to the bursting point with all the animals who’d moved to his well-tended town. And Sonichu has customized everything about his town—even many villagers have followed his bold trends, wearing the patterns he has created!

''(Image captions)''

*Sonichu has packed the museum with his fads—its bug collection is hopping.
*He often visits Sonichu Island to bring its high-value coconuts to town.
*And he uses the spare hut on the island to store his huge collection of oddities.
*Cwcville is brimming with Sonichu’s patterns, including the popular Poké Ball.}}

==PVCC's news report==

The 26 April 2004 issue of [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|PVCC's]] school newspaper, ''The Forum'', included a news report on the "accomplishments" of then-student Christian Chandler. The first half of the article discusses Chris's OFFICIAL and ORIGINIAL creation, Sonichu, while the second half covers Chris's Animal Crossing Documentary, going so far as to quote ''[[Nintendo Power]]'''s own coverage. Everyone can draw their conclusions of how slow news day it was at the PVCC by comparing how big the ''Nintendo Power'' article was, and how big this article was.

===Transcript===

[[File:391-SchuPVCCArticle.jpg|thumb|center|Meet Sonichu]]

{{quotenews|'''Meet Sonichu''' ''Student featured in "Nintendo Power"''

By Kari Mitchell ''The Forum assistant editor''

Most everyone has a hobby. It may be hard to find free time in between classes, especially with exam week quickly approaching, but PVCC student Christian Chandler, has dedicated many hours to his past time. He is the creator of Sonichu, the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon.

Like Sonic, Sonichu can run at high speeds. "During Super Sonic's battle against the [[Perfect Chaos Monster|Perfect Chaos monster]] (''Sonic Adventure DX'' for Gamecube), Super Sonic was spat out by the monster, and colldied with a by-standing Pikachu," Chandler explained. According to his story, the power from the Chaos Emeralds transformed Pikachu into Sonichu.

The idea for the character came from a project Chandler was assigned his senior year of high school. He was enrolled in a computer graphics class that required him to design a CD cover. His original idea was to put Sonic and Pikachu on the cover, however, both characters are copyrighted. Instead he decided to combine the characters into something all his own. Thus, on March 17, 2000, Sonichu was born.

Over time, Chandler began to mold and expand the life of Sonichu, giving him stories, homemade trading cards, clay figures, a board game, and a [[Sonichu medallion]] with charms, among other things.

Chandler and the world he created for Sonichu were featured in the May 2004 issue of ''Nintendo Power.'' The place was called Cwcville (The "Cwc" prefix are his initials, Christian Weston Chandler). Nintendo Power was apparently impressed with Chandler's work. "Simply amazing. There's no other way to describe what we received from Sonichu of Cwcville - a full video documentary that walked us through his daily life." The documentary, running about an hour, was taped from the Nintendo Gamecube title, ''Animal Crossing''. He dubbed his voice over the sound through a microphone and audio input in his VCR. In the documentary, Chandler covers "basically how I do things in ''Animal Crossing'' as the boy character, Sonichu, in the city of Cwcville." Some of the tasks include using the journal as a monthly diary, making money, customizing the city, and conversing with another ''Animal Crossing'' city. For now, Sonichu remains a hobby in the future, Chandler would like to see Sonichu and his friends as real Pokémon, even having their own Nintendo Gamecube video game title. "I am not really sure what to do in order to do all that," Chandler said, "but for now, Sonichu and I, Christian C., are in Nintendo Power Magazine!"}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[The City of Cwicville Tour!]]|nextlink=[[The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special]]|}}

{{CWC on TV}}

[[Category:Media that has been published in real life]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos before 2007| 2003-11-22]]
[[Category:Videos About or Featuring Farts]]

Animal Crossing Documentary

2024-08-28T11:31:54Z

Anemichu: /* Transcription */ added some context for the song

The '''''[[Animal Crossing]]''''' '''Documentary''' is an hour-long video that was filmed on 22 November [[2003]], and later featured on [[Chris]]'s homemade [[DVD]]. Here, you can watch 21-year-old [[Chris]] reach the peak of his maturity, as he immerses himself in a video game targeted for kids on one cold November afternoon. Because of how the video is made (gameplay with the player commentating), this could mean Chris created one of the first-ever video {{w|Let's Play|Let's Plays}}. This video is also notable in that Chris submitted it to ''[[Nintendo Power]]'' magazine, and it was actually featured in their May [[2004]] issue.

==Analysis==
The video offers tours of two different ''Animal Crossing'' towns saved on two different GameCube memory cards. The town of [[CWCville]] is home to [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]], who wears a Sonichu outfit. The town of CWC City is home to [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Crystal]], who wears a [[Rosechu]] outfit.

Some of the narration centers around Chris complaining to [[Nintendo]] about his many personal problems. One can only imagine how the hapless ''Nintendo Power'' employee tasked with watching this video felt at hearing Chris [[Honest Content|constantly bring up]] his [[Virgin with rage|virginity and lack of a girlfriend]]. He expects the company to remember his [[fan]] letters regarding his dreams. He also implies that the company should send him [[Chris and reality|birthday presents]], reissue trading cards that went out of print so Chris can collect them, and adopt his fan characters as official [[Pokémon]]. He also expresses his [[Brand loyalty|distaste]] for [[Sony|the PlayStation and the PS2]], but speaks fondly of many obsolete consoles he owns that weren't made by Nintendo. He also mentions he dislikes a ''{{w|Beyblade: Super Tournament Battle|Beyblade}}'' game because it's "not real" (which is [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 2|disturbing]] in retrospect).

Chris has spent an exorbitant amount of [[Chris and money|money]] on ''Animal Crossing'', purchasing not only the base game (retailing at $49.99) but also a number of relatively obscure hardware add-ons that add functionality to the game, including the Game Boy Advance link cable (MSRP $10.00), the e-Reader (retailing at around $40.00) and numerous e-Reader cards. Chris's propensity for blind brand loyalty and consumerism is on full display here: although the aforementioned e-Reader was maligned by many Nintendo fans and is largely forgotten today, Chris fell for it hook, line and sinker, mentioning that he owns a whopping ''63'' e-Reader cards (which, considering each pack of ''Animal Crossing'' cards included five cards and retailed for $5.00, means that Chris spent a minimum of $60.00 on cards alone, assuming that the leftover 3 cards were freebies that were found loose and not purchased).

[[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys]]' [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (album)|debut album]] is featured prominently, as Chris sings several of the songs aloud and has the CD on repeat playing quietly in the background. "[[Yellow is a Mellow Color]]" plays at least three times in the span of an hour. He also sings along to parts of the game. Much like the boatman Charon ferried the souls of the damned to Hades, a character shuttles Sonichu across a river while Chris sings in the voice that (allegedly) got him fired from [[Wendy's]]. The singing becomes high-pitched gibberish after two stanzas.

There are a few odd moments, like where Chris compares two fighting insects to ''[[I Love Lucy]]'', says a [[Niggos|dark-skinned]] hippopotamus reminds him of ''{{w|Sanford and Son}}'', and talks about his strained relationship with [[Bob Chandler|his father]]. Chris also doesn't mention the {{w|Joy to the World (Hoyt Axton song)|bullfrog character named Jeremiah}}, showing his ignorance of popular [[Chris and music|music]] outside of 90's teen pop and the older music [[Bob Chandler|Bob]] liked. Also, he will gladly [[Chris and work#Chores|pull weeds]] in this game, but not in [[Father Call|real life]].

Chris mentions "profit" from selling in-game items over and over again. This in no way involves real money and is just Chris selling easily-found items dropped by the game to purchase more furniture and crap, which he finds validating. Chris probably enjoys the game because it showers him with rewards for completing simple tasks, none of which are challenging or [[Chris and stress|stressful]].

Chris mentions that his favorite of the NES games available to play in-game is ''{{w|Donkey Kong Jr. Math}}'' because it "really [[Slow-in-the-minds|challenges the mind]] in the math area". The math featured in the game is simple arithmetic that should be well below the average middle schooler's level, much less that of a 21-year-old college student who supposedly graduated high school on the [[honor roll]].

This "[[documentary]]" also provides insight into how Chris projects his own lifestyle onto a video game. His hoarding enters the realm of video games, as he uses his island house to store almost a dozen dressers full of in-game objects. His two houses are full of clutter, his in-game bedrooms look eerily like [[Chris's room|his own]] (right down to a small bed surrounded by clutter), and he refers to every generic "nice" female character as being [[sweetheart|sweet]], and being a genuine [[gal pal|friend]] of his.

This is Chris at his most infantile, immersing himself in a game full of soft animal characters with no conflict or challenge. Throughout the documentary, Chris tells jokes that [[Random access humor|don't make sense in the given context]] and [[Chris and music|plays his poorly dubbed versions of pop songs]]. Note that most of the animals in the game immediately run into their houses whenever Chris tries to go near them.

==Video==
<center>{{Infobox/video
| name=Animal Crossing Documentary
| ytid = 5QtOj7rNFCY
| stardate = 22nd [[November 2003]]
| maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| subject = {{Video games|text}}, {{Website|text}}
| style = {{Comedy|text}}, {{Reason|[[Honest Content|Informative]]}}
| Other = {{Direct Feed|text}}, {{Leaked|[[DVD|Leaked]]}}
| previous = [[The City of Cwicville Tour!#Watch|The City of Cwicville Tour]]
| next = [[The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special#Part 1|The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special]]
}}</center>

===Outline===

{| class="wikitable"
| 00:01-01:24 || Introduction
|-
| 01:25-19:39 || Tour of Cwcville (part 1 of 2)
|-
| 19:40-25:19 || Trip to Cwcville Island
|-
| 25:20-35:24 || Tour of Cwcville (part 2 of 2)
|-
| 35:25-36:44 || Interlude
|-
| 36:45-52:39 || Tour of Cwc City
|-
| 52:40-53:39 || Interlude
|-
| 53:40-55:54 || Conclusion
|}

==Transcription==

'''Introduction'''

[''Video begins with the Nintendo GameCube startup logo as Chris sings along to the tune, followed by the Nintendo logo with Chris saying "Nintendo."'']

[00:24]

I love Nintendo! Welcome to my ''Animal Crossing'' for Nintendo GameCube. I am your host. My name is Christian Weston Chandler. I live in [[Ruckersville]], Virginia and I is [''sic''] 21 years old and I play because I am young at heart. So anyway we are going to take a tour of my ci-ty...in ''Animal Crossing''.

[''Goes to main menu'']

[00:48]

The city's name is CWCville. See, those are my initials CWC. That's why it is spelled that way.

[''Picking menu options'']

[01:01]

And my character's name is Sonichu. You may remember him from, ahh, previous letters I have sent to you guys in the past.

[01:10]

[''Game starts to load town'']

Anyway we are going to get set up now. [''Chris starts singing'']

[''Game is done loading'']

We usually do have a good time.

[1:25]

So anyway, stepping out is my character [[Sonichu]]. He's wearing the [[Chris and fashion|clothes]] with the character on it. Like I said you might remember his face. And there's his actual face.

[''Shows a sign with the face of Sonichu on it'']

You remember the rest of his body you see the whole picture.

And before we get to the daily routines I'm goin' let you...I'm goin' to take you on a tour of my [[house]] as well as uh, as well as you know, uh, a daily routine. We'll take a tour of the town, but first the house. You see this logo here, that is the logo to [[CWC's Sonichu Site!|my website on the internet]]. If you would like to visit, here is the address. I'm going to leave it up for a few seconds.

[''Shows the address to his website for a few seconds'']

[2:02]

Alright, that's enough. Now we're gonna take a [[Tour of Chris's House|tour of my house]].

Turn on the light so you can see better. This is my first floor, obviously. I keep things well organized. I got room to walk around in; I can even dance, wanna see me do I bit?

[''Chris begins to sing'']

[[Yellow Is a Mellow Color|Yellow is a mellow color]] 
Yes it is a mellow color 
Sonichu zaps a lightning 
EEEEEHHHHH mellow color 

[''Chris stops singing'']

Yeah. Course...a...when I, a...do a dance...I usually like to have my uh...audience.

[''Chris puts a wallpaper up on his house, resembling wrestling fans who just witnessed a Stone Cold Stunner.'']

Dodedododododoo. But since it's getting close to [[Christmas]], I have the snowflakes on the wall instead. And I keep it in this closet. So anyway here's a fun thing. This snowman, he teach me how to play piano. And by the way just to let you know in case...a...you can hear the, a...music in the background.

[''Chris appears to be playing [[So Need a Cute Girl]]'']

Those are my karaoke numbers that I actually ma...that I actually made up lyrics to, and I have played and, uh, sang my voice over the originals. So let me give you an example; may I Mister Snowman? "Please go right ahead!" Alright.

[''Chris begins to sing again while Sonichu bangs on the piano, which emits no sound'']

[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|Tell me why]] 
I'm stuck as a 
[[Virgin with rage|Virgin with Rage]]? 
[[Semen#Recycling|Tell me why]] 
I so need a 
Cute Girl my age 
[[Medallions_of_Fail|Tell me why]] 
I never wanna 
Hear you say 
I have a boyfriend!

[''Chris stops singing'']

And that was inspired by a [[Love Quest|real thing]]. By the way that's your website...that is your website isn't it? Nintendo.com, it's a nice place to visit; but we cannot live there. Which brings us up to our next subject...

[''A calendar of November appears on the screen'']

...the [[diary]]. You guys did a good job of it going back and forth within a 12 month radius. By the way, this is my birthday, right here my actual birthday, I was born in 1982. You guys...in case you want to take a note there. OK, that's long enough. So anyway uh, it does make a...not only does it work for a calendar, but it makes for a good monthly journal. As for a monthly journal entry here in November.

[''Chris begins to scroll up and down his journal entry'']

Yeah I tried to get a girlfriend because, I don't have a girlfriend. But I have made up a poem, let you guys read it.

{{quotebox|My dreams of getting a girlfriend was crushed by the medeling [''sic''] [[Mary_Lee_Walsh|"Mary Lee Walsh."]] 
Christian Chandler. 
November 4, 2003 
Saddest Heart in the World 
Lonesome and sad, lonesome and sad, the "Mastermind" is very bad. In efforts of getting a [[Boyfriend-free girl|Boyfriend-Free gal]], that female dog took my only idea for a fall. Heart-broken, sad and very lonely, I'll never remove my virginity. And with Backstreet Boys' tune, I sing my lonesome croon: "Tell me why I'm stuck as a virgin with rage. Tell me why, I so need a...}}

All right. Scroll down a little bit as we go along.

''...cute girl my age. Tell me why, I ain't ever wanna hear you say 'I have a boyfriend.'" And so, deep in dreary thought, a girl was what I sought. A stitch in time, will never remove my...''

It's a very good pro...poem, because I am an artist, as well as a poet. I make a rhyme every time.

''...crying rhyme. I may be destined for loneliness forever, fate is to blame...whatever. I conclude this cry, to say that as long as there are no matching girls, my happiness well runs dry.''

Anyway that's my poem, but in case...a, you didn't notice here. Look right here, "Tell me why, I'm stuck as a virgin with rage." I put my song lyric in here because it was inspired; because I do not have a girlfriend. You know why, cause I have a [[Noviophobia|phobia]] that every girl I talk to she already has a boyfriend.

Right. So anyway moving on with the tour of my house. As you can see I've got- I'm collecting the NES games. I've got most of them down here, and I've got a couple upstairs. One of 'em's fake you know the one I'm talking about, does April 1st strike a bell? But my favorite game is right here.

[''"Would you like to play 
DK Jr MATH?"'']

I like it because...a, it really challenges the mind in the math area and gets your memory fresh there. And by the way, notice the two logos here?

[''Chris is making a motion towards the GameCube and N64 logos'']

It's a good way to welcome the guests, that come into your house. Ol' Nintendo 64 on the left, and GameCube on the right, caught them before an after deal. Oh and look at this, a good little south feng shui here. Of course makes for a good welcome mat. Speaking of feng shui, I've got my red items against the east side, in hopes of getting more NES games; specially that Wario's Woods. By the way, how the heck do you get that game anyway? I mean all you tell us do to is to go to Animal Island. And then what the heck do we do? You should have given us more details, back in the previous issue of uh, the Crossing Guardian.

Speaking of which I've been a long time subscriber. So therefore I've got all their previous issues. And I time travel back and forth when I start ''Animal Crossing'' to collect a few items, but in respect to uh...time traveling back because I missed a few items, I made a new character named "Tim Timetale" and, uh, he time-traveled back and got the remaining items, give them to me, as well as the other character I made up, and, uh, the, uh, the other city in Slot B, which, uh, I'll tell you about that later.

[6:45]

[''Character walks up stairs to the second floor of house'']

Anyway, we're going upstairs. This is my [[Chris's room|bedroom]]. It's a lot of fun, isn't it, because I like to make things fun since, you know, I'm young at heart. And here's a fun joke. Turn on the [[TV]] [''he does, but it just shows static''] sit down and watch TV while I wait t-to get on the [[Internet]]. It's a good way to kill time anyway. Anyway, here's the fake [''brings up caption for the April Fool's NES game, Super Tortimer'']. Sound familiar? Right [''[[sigh|sighs]]'']. Anyway, this is my bed. The harvest bed. Nice choice, isn't it? I'm going to take a quick nap.

[7:17]

[''Character lays down on bed while Chris makes snoring noises too close to the microphone'']

OK. Nap's over. All right. You want to see my music collection? [''Brings up music menu''] It's all good. I got them all courtesy of K.K. Slider. Well, of course, the first one was a freebie from the e-Reader card. "Swipe, Swipe, Swipe". Anyway, here's the fan and the Mario Brothers stuff. Oh, and uh you notice what time it is? It's 1:15. Good time to start. In the afternoon.

[7:48]

[''Character walks down stairs to first floor of house'']

Anyway, now we're going down to the basement.

[''Character walks down stairs to the basement of house'']

Let me just turn on the lights. I keep my models down here. It's a nice little aero fa [sic] models, and I leave enough room for me to walk around in. Well, that's a cute joke.

''"Hey. Stop. You're under arrest."'' 
''"What for?"'' 
''"For, uh, being the black market, you red fox."'' 
''"Ah, geez."'' 

And I got both houses. Yeah, I scored that high with the HRA. Notice this train? I wonder where it's headed to. It's probably headed over to the memory card in Slot B. I'll tell you about that city later. Anyway. This is where I do my cooking. If, uh, if you can ever do your cooking in ''Animal Crossing'' for Nintendo GameCube. I have that DVD. And this is the fridge. I could store my food in there, but I can't. What? Does it have a padlock on it or something? Oh, look. Here's my phone. Let's make a phone call. [''Pulls up phone menu, calling the Dial-a-Psychic''] Hello? Thank you. Good advice. Hey. Let's have a seat on this thing. I like this thing. Listen to this. [''Character sits on the couch and it [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|makes a fart noise]]'']. Let me do that again. [''Character again jumps on the farting couch''] One more time. [''Character again jumps on farting couch with predictable results''] OK. That's enough. Too much fun and [[Random-access humor|you'll die laughing]].

[9:04]

[''Character walks up stairs to first floor of house'']

So anyway, that's my house. Let me just turn off the lights before I leave.

[''Character walks out the front door of house'']

Alright, now where going to go through my daily routines. As well as a tour of the town.

[''Pause menu pops up'']

You notice I've got an empty inventory. And by the way, here's a good rule of thumb. Keeping my shovel, net, pole, axe, and letters here on the bottom row. You know why? I'll tell you bout that when we get to the Nook shop. Anyway, I usually check my mail; what do you know I got three presents. Let's see what this one is though. [[Bob]].

''How ARE you, Sonichu? Well now, I bet your bottom Bell you didn't expect me to cut out and split town, huh? Nope, I shocked the world! I'm turning over a new leaf- see you on the flip side! Laters, Bob''

Oh I guess he moved out, oh well.

[''Sonichu proceeds to throw out poor Bob's letter, then collect his gifts from the remaining letters'']

Anyway, let's see what we got from the, uh, probably from the museum; because I dig up those fossils and uh...I sell them. Makes a nice profit.

[''Sonichu throws away all three letters'']

I just quickly uh read through them and then throw them away. You know like...junk mail! You could also say pop-ups if they had "x's" on em.

[''Sonichu begins to open his gifts'']

See what we got here, A dinosaur track, a Tricera tail, and a dinosaur egg. Well that'll make a nice profit. By the way, in case you missed it the first time I'll put it up again.

[''Once again shows the address to his website'']

Ok you got it, alright now. Before we head to Nook's shop which will be the last stop on the tour; we go- we're gonna take the rest of the tour here. Alright let's see. Well this is the train station. But I travel to the other city which I'll tell you about now. The name of the city is CWCcity. Spelled C-W-C-c-i-t-y, we'll visit there later, but not by train of course. It'll be a hou-It'll be a run by the, uh, character named [[Crystal_Weston_Chandler_(sister)|Crystal]], C-r-y-s-t-a-l, when we get there. All right. Oh, look at this, a hole in the ground.

[''opens the menu to equip his golden shovel'']

Yeah, you see, sometimes there's an item in CWCcity. I don't have it here in CWCville because I have CWCville a lot longer than CWCcity. I bring stuff from CWCcity over here.

[''he digs up the buried item - it's a folding chair'']

'Cause obviously I did not collect this one yet. I got a good memory.

[''Sonichu screws up and digs another hole; he cleans both of them up'']

And also, you know, I got a good taste for music because I grew up on music. So anyway let's move on with- oh, you notice this [a golden statue of Sonichu]? You know why this is here?

[''This statue was erected in honor of Sonichu's full loan repayment!'']

I paid my debt. And this is Sonichu's mug again, right next to the master.

[''Sonichu runs past a sign reading "H.F.A." with two almost invisible red eyes'']

Oh, look at this. H.F.A. And very mean eyes. Must mean something bad. ...I know what it means. I'll tell you about it at the end of the documentary here. Uh, the city of CWCville and CWCcity, or otherwise all the deal [?] in ''Animal Crossing'' for Nintendo GameCube, in a nutshell.

[''Sonichu enters the acre with the post office on it'']

So anyway, here's the post office, do my mailing and such and the e-Reader swipes. By the way there's a good way to profit from the e-Reader, I'll tell you about it in CWCcity.

[''Sonichu comes across a shining ring in the ground'']

Oh, what do you know! A money spot. I'll just dig up the thousand bells.

[''Sonichu pulls a shovel out of his inventory and digs up the money sack'']

Yep, thousand bells, just bury that up. Mmm, drag it up there. Use the R button to quickly pick up the items.

[''Sonichu enters the acre with the dump in it, he enters it'']

Anyway, here's the dump. I come here first, pick up the- whatever items I want every time I start ''Animal Crossing''. Hmm, got a shirt, what do we have here? A plant. I's have picked up a pothos before so I know it's a plant.

[''Sonichu starts wandering into some acres filled with trees'']

I don't really use plants in my house you n-n-noticed, except for that Christmas Tree but that's for, you know, the holidays. Anyway she's around here, I want to show you my favorite character that I kind of got to know from the start.

[''Sonichu finds his way into an acre with a house on it'']

Oop, she just went in. So let's go say hello.

[''Sonichu follows some green squirrel into a house and rams into it'']

Yeah uhm, uhm, would you come out here please?

[''Sonichu walks back into the center of the room and back into the green squirrel, he pushes it into a corner'']

Mmm... Darnit, I can't see her but anyway uh, I think you recognize her. Oh here we go a little bit. Yeah Mint, she's a sweety.

[''Sonichu talks to Mint about some random crap'']

She gave me a birthday present on my 21st birthday when I time-traveled back. Talk to me!

[''Mint rambles on about how it's cold out and how winter's coming'']

Well, what did ya expect? It's November.

[''Mint asks Sonichu if he has a heater'']

Yeah I got a heater in the basement.

[''Mint jokingly mocks him about turning on heaters during November'']

[Chris chuckles] Yea.

[''Mint says something about how it's going to get colder'']

That's right. Well, I'll see you later Minty, you're a sweety.

[''Sonichu leaves Mint's house'']

Anyway that's uhh all so on the trip. We'll take a look at all the other colorful characters we have around here.

[''The town map comes up, different acres are examined'']

Also uh every time I keep track of the-uh map so that I can see if anyone new came in. Oh, we got a new neighbor, Bertha. I haven't noticed her before. So she's obviously new. So anyway uh, let's move on.

[''Sonichu starts running through the woods and comes across some kangaroo'']

Here's another character I grew up with. Actually she moved in, and lived here most of the time. Marcy. And now she's wearing a Sonichu shirt. Sonichu is very popular in CWCville.

[''Sonichu heads south to an acre with some green mouse's house in it'']

There's Anicotti, she just went in.

[''Sonichu heads west and finds some horse's house'']

And there's Elmer. He just went in, he's one of the senior citizens around here too. I say that because he's lived here- by the way our ne- our city pe- fruit is a peach. But I've grown a lot of orange, pears n such.

[14:15]

[''Sonichu heads west and finds a white cat, she says something about how CWCville is amazing'']

Oh whaddya' know, it's that girl from the train.

[''He talks to Blanca'']

I draw her face every time, but when I'm in a hurry I just color it, the whole thing, and she just looks like a... ''Blank face''. But I gave her a face last time.

[''Sonichu starts to head out of the acre but turns around and runs back in, [[Yellow Is a Mellow Color]] begins to play in the background. Chris's "singing" is clearly audible'']

Oh, there was another character up here on the hill.

[''Sonichu heads to a goat's house by a river'']

And she just came out, Chevre. What do you know, she's wearing Elmer's clothes.

[''Sonichu runs out of that acre back into the woods'']

Anyway, moving on with the tour.

[''Sonichu comes to some giant tree with a fountain thing in front of it, Chris mistakes it for a well. Some billboards are to the right of it'']

Well, [Chris chortles] good joke. Anyway I also, you know I like to use the billboards, put my signs up. There's my Sonichu site logo, there's Sonichu's mug. I got two here side by side represent the holidy and such. Yea here we got your corn that you got from the previous issue and I drew this leaf.

[''It doesn't look like a leaf'']

Obviously for Thanksgiving and the harvest festival.

[''A blue bear walks into the video'']

Oh, look there's Groucho. He's wearin' a Sonichu site shirt. Let's say hello.

[''Sonichu starts speaking with Groucho'']

Entertain me.

[''Groucho bitches about his mom and fruit'']

A fruit huh?

[''Groucho offers Sonichu an apple, Sonichu accepts'']

I-I'll take one. Yeah, it makes a nice little profit when you talk to them and most of the time it happens from the jobs.

[''Sonichu walks east and comes across a green lion's house'']

So anyway. Yeah, here's Leopold, he moved in a long time-

[''Sonichu makes his way to a green rooster's abode'']

Here's Hank, he's one of the senior citizens around here also. [unintelligible]

[''Sonichu runs to a teal hippo's house'']

Let's go see our new neighbor. Oh, here she is. She must be Bertha. Hello Bertha.

[''Sonichu talks to Bertha, Bertha talks about how nice the town is, etc.'']

It is a nice place. Heh you're scatterbrained. Yeah, okay, well see you around!

[''Sonichu heads south towards a museum'']

[Chris Grunts] Here's the Museum.

[''Sonichu heads inside'']

Let's go look at the exhibits.

[''We see the inside of the museum as Sonichu heads toward the insect section'']

First, we'll look at the bug exhibit.

[''Sonichu is now inside the insect section'']

I caught most of the bugs.

I'll show 'ya. This is my bug collection, I caught them all one-by-one and donated them one-by-one.

[[I Got A Fish|Wanna' see my number of fish?]] Not as much. Not as much. Anyway, uh, all the bugs are just runnin' around here. Hey, whaddya' know, we got a couple- few bugs on the trees here. Two of them are fighting. Well, that's funny, like [[cats|Lucy and Desi]]. [[I Love Lucy|I love Lucy]].

Anyway, uh, nebit, cebit, zibit, the fish exhibit. Yeah, you can see here I caught those fish and I donated them. Hmm, this one is empty. I guess it's waiting for a kind donation. Yeah, here's a bunch of fish; here's some more fish. One fish, two fish, red fish, blue fish.

Alright, anyway, moving on with the tour the museum, take a look at the paintings. I haven't gotten them all yet, but, uh, I got a few. Here's a nice one, it's strange though. sw- why- I gu- why I'd call it a strange painting. Yeah, some of them are- most of them are just waiting for a kind donation, but I got this one from a swipe. Your uh, Common Painting, from Ol' Boots. Well, my favorite painting around here is, uh, right here. Washington crossing the Delaware, but you guys call it the Classic Paining.

Anyway, moving on. We're gonna' check out what I worked hard for and actually got done, the fossil section. All the fossils, right here; all of them! Dug them all up! Though the last one I completed and the last one I picked up was the pterodactyl. All I needed was the right wing and that completed the pterodactyl. As well as the fossil exhibit; and who's my favorite? It's obvious.

Anyway- oh, you can actually see a bug in that amber, y'know? That right there, I wonder what kind of bug that is. I think it was in the, uh, insect thing. Oh well, forget it. Anyway, moving on with the tour, leaving the museum. See you later, sleeping Blathers.

Well, here's another neighbor, Cookie; She just went in. Alright. Well, anyway, uh, since we're, uh, down here, I'm gonna' tell you a couple of things. This is a- here's a- here's the dock, right here, and there's the sea turtle. Of course I usually would check around the, uh, beach lines for old Gulliver, that sailor bird. You should have called him Pelliper like the Pokémon. You notice these two signs here? You need a Game Boy Advance to get started, but when you come back, welcome to the Gamecube.

Anyway, let's go visit the island real quick, 'cuz I'll show you something fun you could do on the island. I use my Game Boy Advance SP but I do have a GBA as well. Well, I use the, uh, SP for, uh, y'know the e-Reader because y'know my Digimon players. It's, uh, easier to hold as swiping as, as compared to the, uh, GBA, the original.

[''Chris starts singing Kappa's song'']

Yeah- this [[Sweetheart|sweet young lass]], so full of spunk an' sass, over tea, she tells me I gots no class. I ain't no [[Pedofork|crummy creep]] who lives in [[Hoarding|trash heaps]]! I'm just one old sea-hun who needs some [[Laziness|sleep]]. *unintelligible noises* No, I do not. *rhythmic unintelligible noises* Woooh! I know, the singing annoys me too. I just mock it, and that's- that's why I kinda' have this thing on mute anyway. I listen to my music... every time I play. I actually turn it off right after we- just after we- just as we leave the, uh, bridge there.

So, anyway, this is my island, Cwcville island. Looket all these coconuts here, "In the tropical seas with the coconut trees, we will look and see, coconut." Fine little way to make a profit. Here's Flash. "Troz." I gave him that expression, like ''{{w|Pinky and the Brain}}''. So, let's say hello.

''[Flash asks for Sonichu's [[Fashion|rugby shirt]]]

I'll let you have it, 'cause [[Muscle bra|I don't need it]]. It doesn't look too bad on you.

Anyway, here's a fun way to make a profit, a'course, you need the Gameboy Advance for this. You shake the trees, you grab the coconuts. I put them all over her- I gathered them all over here, in this area, and then I just drag them over to the bird. And after the first three coconuts, he gives me money. And I just all put 'em back in the proper place around here. And when I come back to the island, Gamecube version, instead of the uh, on the Gamecube instead of in the Gameboy Advance, after uploading I collect the money, go as high as 30,000 bells, which is very nice.

Anyway, I'll show you what you can do on the house in the island.

[''Goes inside the house'']

I use mine as storage for the, uh, extras items I, uh, don't have room for, at home. Yeah, I got a bunch. 'Course, I got mostly wallpaper and shirts, that's why I got all these dressers.

[''Looks inside a dresser'']

But I've gotten all the uh, carpets from, uh, Sahara. She was here yesterday. Wel- How do I know? I usually keep track, I made a special sticker with my Gameboy camera and I just uh, whenever there's a holiday or ah, when there's a special event as noted by the Copper, I note it on the calendar with one of those special stickers, or write it down whether it's for Cwcville or Cwc City.

[''Exits the house'']

Anyway, we're going to leave the island. See you later Flash! Troz! Or Zort!

[''Goes to Kapp'n so he can leave'']

Hey Kapp'n. Yeah I'm leavin'. No thank you.

[''Gets on the boat'']

Oh, by the way Sonichu's mug is the flag of the island. Obviously. Don't worry, this time I'm not going to imitate his singin'.

Instead I'll talk about something random. [[Sonic the Hedgehog]].

Oh, by the way, those two characters at the tailor shop, Mabel and Sabel, are they hedgehogs or porcupines, cuz I dunno. They look like hedgehogs, and or porcupines, but ah, I'm not sure which are they. But either way, if they're hedgehogs, you got my vote on Sonic. Speaking of which, you should have make- ''Sonic Heroes'' should be Nintendo Gamecube exclusive, because [[Xbox]] and [[Sony|PlayStation 2]], my opinion is the same as yours, they both stink. Yeah, I do not even own them, I do not even want them, and that goes double for the PS One as well.

But if you want to know my game systems, I've had my Gamecube for about almost a year and a half now, got it on May thirty-first, twenty o'two. I got your SNES, Nintendo 64, NES, I got the Genesis 301, with the uh, original Genesis, 32X and Sega CD, as well as Sega Dreamcast, and a Sega Saturn. So I've got mostly all of them, I've been a Sonic fan forever, and that's why I'm glad that Sonic came to Nintendo.

[''Arrives back at Cwcville'']

By the way, you all may remember, that I sent you guys a letter, talking about my dream of Sonic on Game Boy, well you go on my website, check the uh, about the author section, you'll see the ''[[Nintendo Power]]'' magazine cover I made up just for the occasion.

Anyway, welcome back to the Gamecube, let's move on with the tour, shall we? Anyway, we're gonna check the island. Oh, Lighthouse, oh will look at this, there's a weed, I pick weeds, keeps my town clean, as well as uh, Cwc City.

Oh, here's the other billboard I don't kn-know if I've shown you, [[Pokémon|Magikarp]]. that's for the fishing tourney, I drew a Magikarp just for it. Yeah, that's a Magikarp, I didn't have room for a Gyarados.

So, way, ah, here's the Tailor Shop. I got a Game Boy Advance right here as well because, you know, I can use my Gameboy Advance here. So let's go in and see what I got on display.

[''Enters Able Sisters shop'']

Yeah I mean what are they, hedgehogs or porcupines, cuz I can't tell. Anyway, I got Sonichu an Ro-, I got Sonichu right here. Oh, and by the way, this is his girlfriend, you want to know what her name is? [[Rosechu]]. See how that's spelled? Yeah, but you'll see- you'll probably see her and her body on the uh, letter that's included with the VHS here. So anyway, that's her favorite flower, called the Zapbud. Oh, and there's my Sonichu site logo, there's you acc- that you featured in ''Nintendo Power''. And a nice (swipe?) for the Poké Ball, as well as Star Fox emblem.

[''Opens up his saved patterns'']

Here, let me show you the uh, rest of my uh, patterns. Most of them I put together. There's Sonic, right there. And this is Sonichu's evil twin, [[Blake|Black Sonichu]]. I made the Mario as uh, kinda like, you know, the ''Nintendo Power''. Duh. If you guys had a shirt already, and the uh, game, that's from me and then you'll find out later. Oh, because [[It will never end|Spider-Man]] was in town recently, I was inspired. An here's Old Glory. Let's see. Yeah, these are the uh, older patterns I uh, kinda picked up from the shirts as much. And these are patterns I put together myself, there's the Magikarp, and there are others, like you got from ''Nintendo Power'', like the corn, [[the Moon]], groovy. Groovy! I call it groovy. There's the mushroom and the mug. Oh, I got something ready for Christmas, you know, you may notice the wreath back there. Let's see, yeah, here the uh, swiped images. Ah, by the way, you remember Tim Timetrail, that's his logo right there, I call it Time Travel, it's got his name written on there, Time- Tim Timetrail.

Could you excuse me for a minute, I've got an itch in my eye. [''A few seconds pause''] Alright. Anyway, that's taken care of. Let's see, I guess.

[''Selects Time Travel shirt and moves it around'']

What'd I do that for? I'm putting it back. Anyways that's-a, images I got so far.

[''Talks to Mabel'']

No, no thank you, we got nothing. So I'll see you all later. Or ah, another day, somewhat. Hey, I think that looks uh-familiar, what Mabel's sewing up, or's that Sabel? I think that's the noodle design.

[''Exits Able Sisters shop'']

Anyway, moving on. Another weed, well what do you know about that. I usually like to run, it ke-keeps me going faster. Oh, by the way, Puck lives here.

Oh, what do you know, a hole in the ground. I usuall- also usually uh, during my rounds, ["Digs up fossil"] I check for these holes. ["Raises pitch of voice"] And it's an antique! And of course, if I dig up a fossil I just quickly write a letter to the Museum. And I don't have to write anything, so I just get that out of the way real quick. I only keep my shovel in hand cuz there may be a few more holes around here somewhere. Well look at this, another weed.

Anyway, no bird today. So le- let's go see Copper, see if there's anything new at the police station.

[''Talks to Copper'']

Any goings-on? Nothing of import, huh.

It's hard to catch that b- bird you know, the uh, postal character Pete. One time I tried, but then he just flew away. Anyway, you got anything in the police station today Copper? That is uh, anything lost? Oh, we got something? Oh good, I'll go take it, I just usually pick it up and sell it later.

[''Enters police station'']

By the way, as fer the Gulliver, if he has something I have not collected yet, I'll usually keep it. Seeds? Oh well, I'll take it. I could always plant those. Cuz they won't make much of a profit. Anyway, if uh, Gulliver has a gave me something that I already have, I usually just sell it.

[''Exits Police Station'']

Makes a nice profit. Uh anyway, let's plant these flowers. Uh, here's a good place.

[''Plants flowers'']

Alright, what do you know, red tulips.

Anyway uh, there's ah, what's her name. Oh yeah, Portia. Anyway, uh, let's see. Oh yeah, there's Leigh right there.

Oh by the way, you know for Mint? I got her card as well, her ''Animal Crossing'' card. Oh yeah, Chuckles! He likes to wear belt buckles! [[Random Access Humor|Rhyme joke]]. So anyway, uh, moving a little north. Here's the uh, Nook Shop. I got it the best, obviously. But if it gets any better, I'll be surprised. So anyway, uh, let's go inside.

[''Enters Nook's Shop'']

See what see what look lik- See what old Nook has today. [''Sighs'']. Oh, I got to sell these items, I usually do that, I sell him the items.

[''Starts selling things to Nook'']

Items I don't need. Those fossils make a nice little profit, espeg- especially the uh, one that's not within the top five. Whoops. I pressed the B button by mistake.

[''Continues to sell, and starts to hum'']

Doops, I goofed. Yeah, foreign fruits, 500. Although the peaches only get you 100 here. By the way, same fruit in Cwc City, it's a pear. Oh, and I need a sign anyway, so I'll just go ahead and get one of those.

[''Buys sign, clicks through Nook's dialogue about using the sign, and starts humming'']

Anyway, we're going upstairs.

[''Goes upstairs'']

What do ya know, we got the gruesome twosome. They're a comical pair. Ugn, let's see, a blue dresser. Uhh, iris table, refrigerator. Yes, I got this refrigerator already, so I don't need it. I already got the water bird. I've seen those shirts before. Ugn, look at all of these two, they chase me around wherever I go, like I'm some sort kind of [[Autism|nut]] or something. Watch this.

[''Chris makes odd noises that might be mistaken for humming, as he runs around the store and watches the salesman chase him. Sometimes art does imitate real life'']

Almost caught me there. Okay, I'm leaving.

[''Goes downstairs'']

Let's see, was there any other business I need? Oh, I guess I need more paper. So I'll get a sheet, get a pack.

[''Buys paper'']

That's quick, I just pick a random style and just go with that. By the way, in case you're wondering about those button noises, I got the microphone taped to the uh, Gamecube Wavebird here.

Anyway, I'll show you something you can do with the raffle tickets you pick up from here.

[''Exits Nook's Store'']

Instead of making a [[Tour of Chris's House|mess in my house]], I bury them right here, next to the Nook Shop. It's a good place to locate them. So when I'm ready at the end of the month, I just pick up as many as I can hold.

[''Digs up raffle ticket, then buries it again'']

I'm just going to put it back, because it ain't November 30th yet. Oh I guess I don't need this shovel anymore.

[''Puts away shovel'']

Now I'm going to make use of this uh, sign here, the way I should have long time ago, because I didn't think about it. It's already been done in Cwc City, but... Right here by the Post Office, you can use your GBA, oh, well that's a bad place for it. I'm picking it back up. Oh what do you know, another weed.

[''Pulls weed'']

Must of missed that earlier. Anyway, you may post a design, Gameboy Advance, whoops.

[''Picks up sign accidentally'']

What'd I do that for, I'm puttin' it back.

[''Puts it back and adds Gameboy design again'']

There we go. [''Burps''] Excuse me. Hm, I've got well over fifty thousand, so I'm going to make a deposit.

[''Enters Post Office'']

It's ny- It's a good idea to- that you guys did have when you made this thing not only a post office. Oh, I got to mail off that fossil anyway. And I don nee- And it's a good idea to not only you make this into a post office but a bank, saves ya a building. So anyway, see, let's make a deposit. One, two, three, four, five.

[''Deposits 50,000 bells'']

Seven hundred and fifty thousand. It's good saved. I made most of my money from the e-Reader swipes, which I'll tell you about that in Cwc City.

[''Exits Post Office'']

Anyway, uh, lets see. I guess that's it for Cwcville. You guys will be back later. And that- And when you come back, I'll tell you about this sign here. [''Sign saying "H.F.A"'']

Anyway, I'm going home, and I'm gonna save. You may save, Mister Gyroid.

[''Goes inside the house to save, hums a bit'']

You may save and quit.

[''Noise in the background, possibly the radio'']

[''Chris begins to sing''] Do-do-do-do-do-do-do, hey mellow color! Yellow is a mellow color, yes it is. [''Chris stops singing'']

Okay. see you in Cwcville- I mean Cwc City.

[''Title screen'']

At this time, I switched the memory cards. Cuz, ah, I got Cwcvville currently in Slot A, and Cwc City in Slot B. I'm switching the two, putting City in Slot A and Ville in Slot B. So now I'm pressin' the start button.

And here's a resident, Iggy. Here you got- get that down. Cwc City, that's the name of the city right there.

[''Yellow Is A Mellow Color playing faintly in the background'']

And that's her name, Crystal, make sure you get that down. Alright, getting things ready. Have a blast, huh, well that's a fun thing to say.

[''Cwc City is loaded, and starts'']

Anyway ah, this is Crystal. She's wearing the uh, Rosechu look. There's a Zapbud on the door, I got Sonichu- Rosechu's mug right here. [''A sign with Rosechu's face on it''] Yeah, an her ensemble, but let's take a tour of her house first.

[''Goes inside the house'']

It ain't much since, uh, she basically got started, but she's almost done paying off her debt to old Nook. There's your website again. [''A Nintendo bench with their website on it''] Oh look, there's the R-Wing, launching into the uh, Super Mario Brother's World. [''The wallpaper is from Mario'']

Which reminds me, I got to get those two boxes to those two passwords later. Anyway, here's her diary. She got started only on November twelfth. Sonichu got started on October twenty-fourth. Anyway let's see, what else have we got here. Yeah, I got the two logos. Well would you look at that, I got them in the wrong place.

[''Starts moving around the logos'']

Oh well, I'll just move 'em. I didn't notice that before, I got 'em in the wrong place. Well that's no problem. I'll just quickly move them around. Hm, they make it loo- You guys make it look tough to move things around, but actually it's not. Let's see what time it is. Oh, it's one forty-five, huh? Well, it's getting close to being later in the afternoon.

There's her tree, she's getting ready for Christmas too. Let's take a quick trip upstairs.

[''Goes upstairs'']

She got her NES games she got collected up here. A plain old falsehood right there, Super Tortimer. Why'd you guys make that game up anyway? It's so- It's stupid. Cuz it's fake. Anyway, here's a thing. I got lucky and found this. I think I dug it up. Oh-no, wait a minute, I got it from Redd, long time ago. Oh, here's her harvest bed. I got a couple empty tables for- getting ready for a couple more NES games. [''Sighs'']

[''Goes downstairs'']

Anyway uh,

[''Continues down to the basement'']

Her basement isn't sa- as busy as uh, Cwcville, but she's got a few models down here. A couple of tracks models. Oh, there's the Moon. You guys made that thing really big you know, it's too big for me, if you ask my opinion.

Huh, Katrina's a little off, I'm just gonna move her real quick, there we go. Alright, you know there's the glow clock, you notice I had glow [[pickles|cock]]- glow clock in the basement in Cwcville as well.

Oh, you know what, ah, ruh- Crystal's worn her Rosechu outfit long enough.

[''Tries to change her outfit'']

Oops. I guess I can't do that yet. Well, never mind.

[''Goes upstairs'']

Anyway, moving on.

[''Leaves house'']

Before we take a tour of the city, I'mma tell you how to make a f- how you make a fun profit with the e-Reader. I'll check the bulletin board.

[''Checks the bulletin board'']

Ah, that's an oldie.

[''Walks to the Train Station'']

Anyway, 'course, there's the Train Station, I told you earlier about that in Cwcville. There's Rosey's mug. You see no statue cuz, she hasn't paid her debt off. That's why we're going to do this with Crystal. Oh, give me a second would ja, I got to do something real quick.

[''A few seconds pass'']

I'm having my Game Boy and my Wavebird at the same time. That's why I put it over there too.

I use my uh, SP as well here. You know, ah, my funds uh, right here, right? Help my funds. I'm gonna- show you guys something real quick- I use my Game Boy Advance SP to help me out here, since you know, the Digimon deal. Not only that, but, the noise it makes, helps me, uh, clarify, whether I uh, got the card read right. I usually do it ten at a time, I'll tell- elaborate about that more later. But I'm gonna do this on purpose, uh, swipe it awkwardly.

Oops, I musta goofed up. Anyway, gonna try that again, see and ah uh, hear the noise that makes.

Oh, that's right, cuz, ya see, I uh, prepared in advance by, uh, [''Clears throat''] you know, showing you showing my profit.

By goin' on ahead and takin' care of the first set of thirty cards out of 63 that I own so far. Cuz like I said, do it ten at a time. By anyway, ah,

[''Exits Post Office'']

[''Sighs'']

Let me just go ahead an uh, show you how you make a nice little profit. Okay, first step you uh, swipe the first ten cards, right? Cuz that's the maximum you can hold in your mailbox. Open your mailbox, get your ten letters into your hold there. And then you just, ah, grab and drop it to the first ten slots. By the way, rule of thumb, elaborate earlier with the five down here. Cuz you know, when you ah, sell your items to Tom, it usually ends up on the first item, and you- that, that way you have these guys on the bottom, they will not get in the way, you won't have to move the uh, hand.

So anyway, uh, we're gonna go to the Nook Shop. There's Iggy again, gonna play with his ball. Like I said, I haven't gotten that far here yet, in Cwc City.

[''Enters Nook Shop'']

There's old Tom. I've taken care of all my uh, errands, like ah, Chris and the little Sonichu I showed you back there. Anyway, we're going to do some selling.

[''Starts selling things to Nook, some other song from Christian and the Hedgehog Boys in the background'']

Obviously, I don't have sa- much to say at this point. So I'm just going to let you guys listen to the music while I sell.

[About 30 seconds later, he finishes selling, and leaves the store]

Okay, I got more to say. After I uh, sell the uh, first set ten, I get that out of the way. Like I said before, of course I do this with the R button.

[''Starts removing gifts from letters, then deleting the letters'']

I just pick up, and put 'em over there. 'Course, I have precise order, I do it from the first letters- first card swiped to the last card swiped. I usually swipe them in the uh, in order of their card numbers. Cuz ah, that's just the way I do it. Also, I use the uh, ''Animal Crossing'' card that came with the e-Reader,you notice the musical note in the first set. I just count that as card triple zero. Makes a good idea, by the way, according to- by the way, speaking of the e-Reader cards, you guys should really uh, print out some more uh, of series- more of the early series. like series one. Cuz, you know, since I just just started you sh- I really want to collect those. And uh, I really would like if you uh, publish some more of those uh, series ones. I don't care if do like you know, second edition or whatever. But print out more of those cards, please. Anyway, uh, I just click- just [[Mailbag|read the letters real quick and then throw them away]] like junk mail. After I get rid of the presents.

[''Finishes throwing letters away'']

By the way, I hope you guys took note of the uh, amount in the previous deal in the Post Office. Anyway, after I delete the last letters, I open them up.

[''Opening up all his gifts'']

One by one, in an orderly flash- orderly fashion. A'most said orderly flashin'! Anyway...

[''Finishes opening his gifts'']

Let's see, with that done, I head back home.

[''Runs to his mailbox'']

And get the next set of ten I have ready. And then I head back to the Post Office.

[''Runs to Post Office'']

And swipe the next set of ten.

[''Enters Post Office'']

And uh, just to let you know, every fifty- every point over fifty thousand, you should make a deposit. But since I'm a good number at start, I'm not gonna do that. So, uh, after all the uh, e-Reader swipes, you should come up to a very nic-

[''Video cuts out for a second, possibly the result of Chris editing the video so we wouldn't have to wait for him to swipe the e-Reader cards'']

an profable- profitable proposition there. And after ah, swiping all those cards, then a nice grand total there. We can make a very generous donation. Or should I say deposit? The usual fifty-thou.

[''Deposits 50,000 bells'']

Here ya go. No thank you. Well, anyway ah, besides ah, selling those things, those uh, profitable items from the e-Reader cards, if there are any I haven't collected yet, I usually just keep 'em.

[''Exits Post Office'']

(Cuz I like the sound of them?) Like for example, the uh, Pansy models downstairs. And well, since that's over with.

[''Changes shirt'']

She just changed into her regular- her uh, nice warm clothing for the winter. Her ski sweater. So anyway, uh, let's see uh. Oh yes, I guess I should- she shoul- we should give you a tour of Cwc City.

Well, you have seen the uh, Post Office, and the Nu- Nook Shop. But I'll tell you the dump is in the opposite location compared to CWCville. And there it is, the dump. And uh, let's see. There's Money. She used to live in CWCville but she moved here. And there's Sally. She moved here.

[''Checks map'']

I have to check the map every now and then because the different location. Let's see, there's Carmen. [''Sing-song''] Carmen San Diego! Carmen San Diego!... Causing mischief around the world!

Let's see now. Oh yeah, that's Pinky. That's Pinky. There's the Museum. Oh, would you look at this, a hole in the ground. Let's see what's in it.

[''Digs up fossil'']

And it's [[Bob|an antique]]!

Must have missed that one previously. Oh well, I'll just simply write the old Museum a letter. Or not write a letter. Like I sent it to them anyway. [Goes to put away shovel, then changes his mind]

Ah, I best to hold on to that just in case. Let's see. Oh, Katrina's tent, she's here today. And there's Rollo. I think a friend sen- I think of Sanford and Son everytime I see Rollo. [''Scatman Chris''] Doo-doo-doo-doo-a-rawdl-et-do-do-do-do-alot-dude-alot-do-do-dolot-a-dood-alot-dooo. Do-do.

Speakin' of fr- speakin' of Sanford and Sons, my father an I, we have a relationship like Stanford and Son. He starts more arguments than there are flies in a garbage dump. Anyway, let's see, I took every care of business, and I do not need to talk to Copper, but there's the Police Station.

And what's at the shoreline for that stupid bird, and possibly anymore uh, holes in the ground.

[''Singing'']

There's nothing quite like a hole in the ground, hole in the ground, hole in the ground. There's nothing like a hole in the ground, here is, the lighthouse!

[''Stops singing'']

We got a stone bridge here in the city.

[''Sings again'']

There's nothing like a hole in the ground, a hole in the ground

[''Stops singing'']

Oh, we got two neighbors up here. Let's see. Yeah. There's a, Jeremiah. we got a new neighbor. Yeah, that was Pinky. She moved in today. Anyway, there;s the Tailor Shop. Right here. Already took you there over in Cwc Ci- Cwcville. And well, here's the dock. The island is, uh, we kept it for the ah, kre- for a memorial, we used Tim Timetale's island. As uh, we uh, trans- we exchanges between us- we exchanged it with the original island of Cwc City. Anyway, it's got the Tim Timetale flag on it. So we're not going to bother going there. Anyway, you know the two signs.

[''Goes to Wishing Well'']

Well. That joke never gets old. Anyway, there are two holiday signs, got 'em down here, here in the city. There's Rosey, and we got the Sonichu site logo here as well. There's a uh, shovel tree. That's Buzz. Buzz Lightyear. To infinity, and on your head! Oh, and there's uh, Cashmire. I got a card for Baah-bra. Huh, too bad she ain't here. And uh, I'm not sure, oh wait, yes I'm sure. Yeah, you have seen him, uh, Iggy. He's around here somewhere. I'm not gonna bother. Anyway, here's the Nook Shop, once again. And well, uh, I guess that's it for uh, Cwc City. oh, I got the fishing tourney sign around here somewhere. You've already seen that, so I'm not gonna bother finding it.

Anyway uh, let's see. Oh, I got to mail this uh, fossil off. After I do that, we're going to go back over to Cwcville for uh, closing ceremonies of this great documentary I've put together. you'll find out what that "H.F.A" stands for.

[''Goes inside post office'']

So, stay tuned! And relax.

[''Starts mailing letter'']

In the meantime, here's some music.

[''Plays Yellow is a Mellow Color'']

[''Exits Post office'']

[''Goes and saves his game'']

[''Start screen'']

[''Loads Cwcville'']

[''Finally turns off Yellow is a Mellow Color'']

Welcome back to Cwcville! And we're here for the closing ceremonies, so the uh, documentary of the city of Cwcville and Cwc City in Animal Crossing, [''Raises pitch of voice''] for Nintendo Gamecube! But first, I'm gonna tell you a couple of things. Sonichu and Rosechu. [''Burps''] [''Faintly''] Excuse me.
I'm just going to let you know who they are, they're Pokémon. I made them up. They're both Electric-types, alright. Obviously. Sonichu and Rosechu are Pokémon I made up. They're Electric-types. They've got evolution, [[Metonic]] and [[Vamprosa]]. You want pictures, you gotta ask me for them. Also they got baby forms, [[Sonee & Rosey|Sonee and Rosey]], they're cuties. So anyway, if you've missed it the first couple of times.

[''Shows bulletin saying "CWC's Sonichu Site!
http://sonichuchandler.tripod.com/cwcson.htm"'']

Here is one last time. Okay, and uh, to answer the all important question; What is the meaning of "H.F.A"? With the two red eyes. I will tell you. Got that? it means "High Functionally [[Autism|Autism]]" because that's what I am, I'm High Functionally Autistic. I may have autism, but since I'm [[honor roll|high functional]], I do all- I can do alot of things. I mean otherwise I wouldn't even do this documentary I'm doing right now.

So let's see, is there anything else I need to cover? Well, I guess not. But anyway, uh, this is the city of Cwcville and there's a- don't forget Sonichu website if you want to go see it. I've been playing video games for as long as I can remember. And listening to music as long as I can remember. So, we're going to end this documentary by obviously leaving. If you want credits, ya have to look at the uh, enclosed letter.

[''Starts saving game'']

But anyway, uh, pu- for in the submission of Nintendo Power. This has been a, [[Chris and Ego|documentary narrated by Christian Weston Chandler]]. Thank you very much, and I hope that you will [[Chris and Reality|consider this for publication]]. Bye now.

[''Nintendo logo and title screen. It ends with Chris, from "[[Feel So Lonesome]]", saying "Stop!"'']

[''The video normally ends here, but on other versions of it, this is followed by 5 commercials for the game (likely taken from a promo DVD), and then...'']

[''Shows bulletin reading "For Nintendo Power...A Bonus Feature! Later on...". The character moves towards a golden statue reading "This statue was erected in honor of Crystal's loan repayment!". The character moves around some trees, bushes and the sign board, before moving to the bulletin board, flipping to a new page. Chris types in "Bye-Bye!" and then a happy face. He then throws out the letter, and then moves back to the bonus feature one for a few seconds before the video finally ends.'']

==''Nintendo Power'' article==

''[[Nintendo Power]]''’s May 2004 article on Chris’s documentary covers only Sonichu’s life in Cwcville. The way that the article speaks of Sonichu’s actions, most casual readers would be led to believe that “Sonichu” is the real name of the person who submitted the documentary.

[[Image:CWCSchuCross.jpg|thumb|center]]

===Transcript===

{{quotenews|'''Sonichu’s Cwcville Documentary'''

Simply amazing. There’s no other way to describe what we received from Sonichu of Cwcville—a full video documentary that walked us through his daily life. His opulent manor contained every manner of furniture. Cwcville’s landscape was filled to the bursting point with all the animals who’d moved to his well-tended town. And Sonichu has customized everything about his town—even many villagers have followed his bold trends, wearing the patterns he has created!

''(Image captions)''

*Sonichu has packed the museum with his fads—its bug collection is hopping.
*He often visits Sonichu Island to bring its high-value coconuts to town.
*And he uses the spare hut on the island to store his huge collection of oddities.
*Cwcville is brimming with Sonichu’s patterns, including the popular Poké Ball.}}

==PVCC's news report==

The 26 April 2004 issue of [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|PVCC's]] school newspaper, ''The Forum'', included a news report on the "accomplishments" of then-student Christian Chandler. The first half of the article discusses Chris's OFFICIAL and ORIGINIAL creation, Sonichu, while the second half covers Chris's Animal Crossing Documentary, going so far as to quote ''[[Nintendo Power]]'''s own coverage. Everyone can draw their conclusions of how slow news day it was at the PVCC by comparing how big the ''Nintendo Power'' article was, and how big this article was.

===Transcript===

[[File:391-SchuPVCCArticle.jpg|thumb|center|Meet Sonichu]]

{{quotenews|'''Meet Sonichu''' ''Student featured in "Nintendo Power"''

By Kari Mitchell ''The Forum assistant editor''

Most everyone has a hobby. It may be hard to find free time in between classes, especially with exam week quickly approaching, but PVCC student Christian Chandler, has dedicated many hours to his past time. He is the creator of Sonichu, the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon.

Like Sonic, Sonichu can run at high speeds. "During Super Sonic's battle against the [[Perfect Chaos Monster|Perfect Chaos monster]] (''Sonic Adventure DX'' for Gamecube), Super Sonic was spat out by the monster, and colldied with a by-standing Pikachu," Chandler explained. According to his story, the power from the Chaos Emeralds transformed Pikachu into Sonichu.

The idea for the character came from a project Chandler was assigned his senior year of high school. He was enrolled in a computer graphics class that required him to design a CD cover. His original idea was to put Sonic and Pikachu on the cover, however, both characters are copyrighted. Instead he decided to combine the characters into something all his own. Thus, on March 17, 2000, Sonichu was born.

Over time, Chandler began to mold and expand the life of Sonichu, giving him stories, homemade trading cards, clay figures, a board game, and a [[Sonichu medallion]] with charms, among other things.

Chandler and the world he created for Sonichu were featured in the May 2004 issue of ''Nintendo Power.'' The place was called Cwcville (The "Cwc" prefix are his initials, Christian Weston Chandler). Nintendo Power was apparently impressed with Chandler's work. "Simply amazing. There's no other way to describe what we received from Sonichu of Cwcville - a full video documentary that walked us through his daily life." The documentary, running about an hour, was taped from the Nintendo Gamecube title, ''Animal Crossing''. He dubbed his voice over the sound through a microphone and audio input in his VCR. In the documentary, Chandler covers "basically how I do things in ''Animal Crossing'' as the boy character, Sonichu, in the city of Cwcville." Some of the tasks include using the journal as a monthly diary, making money, customizing the city, and conversing with another ''Animal Crossing'' city. For now, Sonichu remains a hobby in the future, Chandler would like to see Sonichu and his friends as real Pokémon, even having their own Nintendo Gamecube video game title. "I am not really sure what to do in order to do all that," Chandler said, "but for now, Sonichu and I, Christian C., are in Nintendo Power Magazine!"}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[The City of Cwicville Tour!]]|nextlink=[[The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special]]|}}

{{CWC on TV}}

[[Category:Media that has been published in real life]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos before 2007| 2003-11-22]]
[[Category:Videos About or Featuring Farts]]