CWCki - User contributions [en]

Talk:Lars' Ship has Sunk.MOV

2010-09-25T23:14:31Z

BADavid:

== T-shirt ==

The t-shirt isn't plain white. It has some red logo/writing on it, which is most visible near the end of the video. Kudos to anyone able to work it out. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 15:59, 25 September 2010 (PDT)
:It says Brick Fest 2005 or 2006, June 9-17, and a URL at the bottom. Seems like some promotional item for Lego. --[[User:Xanabit|Xanabit]] 16:08, 25 September 2010 (PDT)
::It is from 2000, I'm pretty sure near the end you can clearly see "000" after the fold in this shirt. [http://www.brickshelf.com/gallery/kl/brickfest/tshirts/front-detail.jpg closeup of what it probably says,] [http://www.brickshelf.com/gallery/kl/brickfest/tshirts/front.jpg front], [http://www.brickshelf.com/gallery/kl/brickfest/tshirts/back.jpg back]. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 16:13, 25 September 2010 (PDT)
::[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/BrickFest BrickFest] is an unofficial LEGO convention which is usually held in Virginia - I guess this is another convention that Chris has attended.--[[User:BADavid|BADavid]] 16:14, 25 September 2010 (PDT)

June 2010

2010-06-19T14:02:41Z

BADavid:

[[Image:Grandtheft_CWC.jpg|thumb|On '''4 June''', Christian's vendetta against those who wronged him continued.]]
[[Image:100 0695.JPG|thumb|Chris on '''18 June''', proving to us that he hasn't learned a damn thing.]]
'''June 2010''' started out with a whimper. After Chris's [[100 2189|fourth threat]] to leave the [[Internet]], many fully expected that Chris would not keep to his word. The first signs of him not staying true to his word was the fact that he continued to log in to his [[YouTube]] account. However, some suspect that the ''real'' reason he was quiet for the start of the month was ''[[ModNation Racers]]''.

The silence was then broken on 4 June. Chris traveled to [[The GAMe PLACe]] with the desire to take a picture of [[Michael Snyder]] so that he could print it out and put it on a dartboard. Long story short, Chris attempts vehicular homicide while [[Alcohol|drunk]] and he's let off scot-free by the [[police]]. Two days later, he makes a video addressing these events, and announces that he's leaving the Internet. [[Chris and hypocrisy|Again]]. [[Youtube Finale|For]] [[03212010 C-Ya Later.MOV|the]] [[100 2188|fifth]] [[100 2189|time]].

Chris then fell silent for twelve days. As usual, a few faggots jumped to the conclusion that the CWC saga was over. The faithful were then rewarded on 18 June, when a field agent spotted Chris at the [[Fridays After Five]] event in [[Charlottesville]]. He then took several pictures of Chris and uploaded them to the internet for the world to see. In a few of these pictures, he is wearing a [[sports bra]] which reads "[[Love Quest|WANT WOMAN]]", thus showing that ever since he was compelled to leave the internet by [[Rocky|an outside force]], he has gone back to the era of the [[attraction sign]]. This time around, it's not so much retarded as it is really creepy.

==Events of June 2010==
* 4 June - The Charlottesville Incident. Chris makes a [[Reeb|drunken]] trip to [[The GAMe PLACe]], one of the places he's banned from, takes a photograph of the [[manajerk]] [[Michael Snyder]] (and/or his daughter) and is confronted by the Snyders and the police.
* 6 June - Michael finally confirms our suspicions. [http://www.youtube.com/comment_servlet?all_comments=1&v=Uvgy-m2KbGw Mike on YouTube] talks about how Chris tried to [[pedofork|take pictures of his daughter]] and [http://www.youtube.com/comment_search?username=thercholic how he tried to run him over]. Surprisingly, [[CWC's Diary#June 2005|this isn't the first time he's tried to kill people with his car]].
* 6 June - Chris uploads a [[June062010.MOV|video]] addressing Michael Synder's accusation against him, along with dispelling the rumor that he sexually molests his [[cats]].
* 10 June - [[Fan:TV Tropes|TV Tropes]] article on ''[[Sonichu]]'' gets deleted and locked due to "negativity".
* 17 June - TV Tropes article gets partly restored but is still locked to prevent an edit war.
* 18 June - Chris's half-brother [[Cole Smithey]] becomes an object of hate to the general public after he gives the first negative review to the otherwise critically-acclaimed ''Toy Story 3''.
* 18 June - Chris attends the [[Fridays After Five‎]] event, dressed as a [[gay]] trucker and acting like a [[pedofork]].

{{Timeline}}

Chris and death

2010-04-13T12:31:27Z

BADavid: /* Sarah Jackson (1981-2008) */

[[Image:PattiLuv.jpg|thumb|right|Rest in peace?]]
'''Death''' stalks [[Chris]] at every turn, and as a result he is really poor when it comes to understanding and/or coping with death, be it the death of a human or an [[Patti Chandler|animal]], or even a [[Simonla Rosechu|fictional character]].

His poor reactions to death most likely come from Chris's lack of empathy, and his incredibly underdeveloped mind. Kids often don't understand death until they're quite old, around 10-12 years; before that, they usually just think it's "like sleeping forever" or "just leaving." Chris, being a 3-year-old inside, can only resort to these clumsy analogies to sort of understand death; he even has a habit of appealing to dead people to "come back."<ref>[[I Am The TRUE, Original Christopher Christian Weston Chandler; No Ifs, Ands Or Buts#A history (6:02 to 9:34)]]: "Patti, I miss you. Come home."</ref><ref>[[:Image:SchuComic9P31.jpg]]: "Dedicated to Mr. Billy Mays II; Please Come Back Soon."</ref>

It could be that the only shows that Chris watched that dealt with death in any way had plot devices to facilitate the return of the departed. Chris, who is unable to connect cause with effect and considers behaviors from fiction to be interchangeable with reality, may simply assume that the dead can come back whenever they want.

Here are the departed souls, in order from earliest to latest:

==Deaths==
===Every single victim of the World Trade Center attacks (19XX-2001)===
In the [[Twin Falling Towers]] video of the first of [[November 2009]], Chris makes fun of [[Clyde]] and says that he is as weak as the Twin Towers. He then shows the mouse cursor crashing into the buildings, complete with sound effects. This has shocked many, including somebody who lost a loved one in the attacks<ref>[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCDjrjr3b7M]</ref> and this could possibly be the lowest that Chris has ever gone.

===[[Patti Chandler]] (1988-2006)===
Patti was Chris's dog, and she died in June 2006. Chris [http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/User:AZT-13/Chris-chan_Emails_Part_IV apparently drew a picture of a crying Sonichu face] on the signature confirming the euthanasia process. As seen in the image used in this article, [[Patti-Chan|Patti also appeared in the comic, immortalized as an anthro]]. This is particularly disturbing in that Chris has apparently decided to deny his dog the afterlife that he presumably believes in, in favor of locking her in his own [[CWCville|personal hell]], in which she will only exist when he can be bothered to draw her. Effectively, he's stolen and erased her soul.

To Chris, her death is the greatest tragedy of his life, which he often compares to the deaths of other people's family members and loved ones. Not surprisingly, every single person he has said this to has become horribly offended, yet he continues to use this example.

Oddly enough, Patti may have been the only being Chris ever cared about. Supporting this is a report that Chris periodically broke down in tears for as many as six months after her death.{{cite}} By comparison, the "death" of any [[Troll|Sweetheart]] will result in a day of mourning if they are lucky.

===RocketFox's Dad (1966-2008)===
RocketFox's Dad used to be an [[alcohol]]ic, but recovered and stayed sober for ten years. However, his liver failed and he passed away in mid-October 2008. When RocketFox asked Chris for advice on how to cope, Chris considered it an "accident" and went on a spiel about how bad alcohol was.<ref>[[IRC (16 October 2008)]]</ref> This is actually the first death during the [[troll]]ing, and it was mentioned to Chris to see how he would react to such news, and as mentioned, Chris did so poorly. [[Ryan]]'s death and Chris's reaction cemented this. About eight months later, Chris [[Chris's Big Night Out|became a huge hypocrite]]...

===[[Sarah Jackson]] (1981-2008)===
A former [[Sweetheart|heartsweet]] of Chris (and Decepticon) who was killed in a <s>car crash</s> carefully executed plan by [[Optimus Prime]]. SPOILERS: A [[troll]]. Sarah Jackson, like Patti, was used in his comic for a while as "Ms. Jackaras" in [[Sonichu 9]]. Unlike Patti, Ms. Jackaras gets the same fate as her non-comic counterpart, and is replaced by her sister, who continues the lesson anyway. None of the Sonichu characters mourn the loss of their professor. Sound like [[Chris|someone]]?

===[[Ryan Cash]] (1996-2008)===
Ryan was [[Clyde Cash|Clyde]]'s brother who was a huge fan of [[Sonichu]]. After the [[Sonichu (comic)|comics]] were delayed over and over, Ryan fell into a depression and committed suicide. [[Captain's Log, Stardate December 28th, 2008|Chris, of course, reacted to this in an inconsiderate manner, telling Clyde and his family to "just move on", and marveling at his power to incite suicide.]]

===[[PandaHalo]]===
Despite her being thousands of kilometers away from the bushfires, Chris assumed PandaHalo was dead. She is actually alive and kicking but Chris still doesn't know this. Two days after her "death," he went to find another [[sweetheart]] to [[Mass debating|mass debate]] to, saying "It's OK though, at least I have a [[Julie|good woman]] who's willing to be by my side at this point."<ref>[[Mumble 7#Summary]]</ref> This flagrant disrespect shouldn't surprise anyone because Chris is a self-centered asshole. This saga ''further'' proved that Chris has no sense of empathy or respect for the dead.

Nine months later, [[Sonichu 9]] featured a special "memorial" to PandaHalo and a sequence in which she dies (off-screen) in a building fire after saving her "Pokemon", [[Chloe Rosechu]] and [[BlazeBob Sonichu]], so they wouldn't "burn with" her. Apparently, Chris didn't feel like he needed to honor the life of his beloved [[sweetheart]] and instead depicted her horrible, fiery death. He also has to mention that she "burned," which shows how he doesn't realize how painful and awful it would be to die in a fire. It's also not a term that anyone would use to describe the death of a loved one, providing more evidence of how little he actually cared about her. Because it took nine months to "honor" her death, he most likely decided he needed more god-awful characters for his shitty comic, was too lazy to create a new recolor and chose to use Chloe and BlazeBob, thus reminding him of PandaHalo, who he had likely forgotten, and made him decide to feature a memorial to her.

More recently, Chris "dedicated" all of [[Sonichu 10]] to PandaHalo's memory. This would be almost touching, if the alleged dedication didn't wholly consist of how awesome Chris was for using Panda's cover artwork. And then there's the issue of Sonichu 10 largely consisting of Chris murdering everybody he dislikes...

===[[Sarah May]]===
After being called "[[Julie]]" multiple times, Sarah May [[Troll|attempted suicide]] over [[Mumble_8|Mumble]]. Immediately after she went offline, rather than express any concern or try to find a way to stop her, Chris told Julie (who was also in the chat), "I still have you," with a completely emotionless "oh well" attitude. Julie was playing along with Chris, and did not react to Sarah's suicide attempt in any human-like fashion either; yet, it did not occur to Chris that Julie's behavior was ''in any way'' unnatural. Chris then made an [[CWC Shout Out to Sarah May|immature shout-out to her on a YouTube video]], with tears faker than all his [[sweetheart]]s combined. His reason for her to hold on? Because he'd be so sad without her. While mentioning the feelings of friends and families despair is typical in suicide prevention, Chris did it in such a selfish way, only thinking of how ''he'd'' feel, not how ''her'' family and friends would feel, that it was just full of [[fail]] and [[Chris and His Ego|narcissism]].

===[[Aunt Corrina]] (1936-2009)===
Chris's aunt Corrina had her funeral on Chris's birthday, which was also Shrove Tuesday, a Christian holiday that involves eating pancakes.<ref>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shrove_Tuesday</ref> Needless to say, [[White knight#Chris cares only for himself|Chris cared more about the pancakes than the funeral of his own aunt]]. Patti was also obtained from her (see the e-mail link above).

When the "I know how to be sad because my dog died" excuse fails, Chris usually follows up with an offhand mention of his Aunt Corrina. If that fails the deaths of his many sweethearts tends to follow, although any normal human would bring those up first and the dog would be lucky to get a mention at all.

===[[Clyde Cash]] (1976-<s>2009</s>)===
In early 2009, Christian once seemed to be aware that Clyde Cash was supposedly dead, but cast a slight bit of doubt over the idea. Regardless, he [[curse-ye-ha-me-ha|cursed]] Clyde in [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 18th, 2009]], just in case. He's back.

===[[BILLY MAYS]] (1958-2009)===
In the video [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 1st, 2009]], Chris only seems to be upset over people blaming him for Mays's death, and loudly denies that he was ever the mayor of [[CWCville]]. He doesn't even offer his condolences to Mays' family. Down the line, Chris selfishly adopts the idea that Mays was in fact his bodyguard and he died protecting Chris. He goes even further by stating that he was also his identical body double and "without the beard we'd look the same". At least he's admitting that he's overweight.

In [[Sonichu 9]], Chris slaps in a one-page intro with Billy saying that he was never was the mayor, but was part of Chris's group. At the bottom was a message from Chris, asking him to "come back soon". Ninety pages later, we find out that Billy had seemed to die falling down an elevator shaft, attempting to free Ivy from HER gruesome death. The next issue, however, had him appear alive and well, trapped like [[Patti-Chan|Patti Chan]] in his own personal Hell of CWCville.

===[[Ivy]] (1992-2009)===
Former [[troll|sweetheart]] Ivy committed suicide after not being allowed to see Chris. Chris uploaded the [[CWC "Boyfriend"]] video as a memorial. Yes, a poorly sung remake of Avril Lavigne's happy, bouncy pop/punk song, with lyrics changed to be about how much Chris would like women to date him. Unless the original was somehow Ivy's favorite song, this is just short of "Another One Bites the Dust" as one of the worst possible songs one can dedicate to a recently deceased loved one. Chris included pictures of several past sweethearts in the video, making it less of a tribute to Ivy and more of a monument to Chris's [[fail]].

Furthermore, as is unquestionably appropriate, Ivy's tragic demise was incorporated into [[Sonichu 9|Issue 9]] of the comic. Rather than admit to having a hand in her suicide, Chris conjures up a magnificently gruesome accidental death, which involved having gotten her neck broken with elevator wires after falling through the elevator floor. Although this is a particularly troubling manipulation of what really happened, Chris more than makes up for it with gravitas; he gracefully, albeit belatedly, offers a tiny orange box in memory to Ivy 'O'Niel', taking pride of place underneath a backshot of Slaweel and some weird faux-Transformers actions. All of the above shows the leaps and bounds Chris has made in his appropriate handling of tragic deaths.

When confronted about this insanity in the [[Mailbag]], Chris got quite indignant, demanding to know what the questioner thought he should have done, since Ivy had died in real life and could no longer serve as Chris's [[GodJesus|God-given sweetheart]]. Why he felt the need to make her death in the series gruesomely similar to her real-life suicide is a question for the ages. It's not clear whether it had ever crossed Chris's mind to keep this horrific death out of the pages of what is supposedly a comic aimed at children, or to let Ivy's character live on in CWCville like he had done for [[Patti Chan]] and [[BILLY MAYS]].

==="Mary Jo"===
In a [[Mailbag 27#Love and loss| recent mailbag]], Chris was asked by a troubled [[troll|fan]] what he should do after the death of his beloved Mary Jo.

{{quote|Mary Jo is gone (I feel for you), but you should move on and try to find another woman who will treat you about as good, or possibly better than, her. Suck it up, and move on like a Man would. I tell you as a Man who had to do the same thing a few times in the past too.| Chris, being super-sensitive.}}

Chris clearly states how he believes a death should be approached by a man (which includes finding another [[sweetheart|woman]] right away and a specific lack of grieving), and tells the traumatized fan that he should simply move onto a better woman since his girlfriend's death, not only being completely asinine, but also outlining that he believes women to be [[women's rights|replaceable and possibly interchangeable]].
[[Image:RIP mike.JPG|thumb|Mike's obituary.]]
===Mike Jackson (1969-2010)===

Throughout [[January 2010]], a man named Mike Jackson sent Chris a series of friendly letters [[Mailbag 31#If your kids are 16 or 17, you should watch porn with them|asking]] [[Mailbag 35#In which Chris advises a father to buy his son whores|for]] [[Mailbag 39#In which Chris refers to a man buying his underage son a whore as "good news"|advice]], and then [[Mailbag 45#Adventures with whores|begging]] for [[Mailbag 48#This guy's life is in shambles, but Chris was STRESSED!|help]] after Chris's amazingly bad advice completely ruined his life. Chris, caring soul that he is, promised the absolute minimum amount of effort (a [[YouTube]] video) and then never made good on his word.

Distraught over Chris's total lack of action, and terrified at the risk of having his family torn to pieces, Mike [[Mailbag 52#This, if anything, requires a canned response|died from a sleeping pill overdose]]. Mike's grieving widow generously decided to let Chris view the private obituary page set up for friends and family of the deceased, saying that Mike would have wanted her to treat Chris with respect and decency.

Chris responded to the news of Mike's death with the same copy-pasted bullshit he used to pretend he was listening to criticism. The two infamous sentences made no sense in context and demonstrated beyond the shadow of a doubt that Chris could not care less about Mike's tragic death. It was revealed in [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 8]] that Chris didn't even view Mike's obituary page, and his [[Mailbag 56#In which Chris isn't sorry at all|response]] to Mike's grieving son was all of three words long.

The Mike Jackson "mini-saga" might be the most conclusive proof yet that Chris doesn't understand the consequences of his terrible advice, or the gravity of the tragedy he caused.

===Simonla Rosechu===
[[Image:SandyRosechu.jpg|80px|right|thumb|The bastard child in question.]]
During the [[Asperchu]] saga, a recurring theme was [[Evan]]'s legal claims in regard to [[Simonla]] as a derivative of his character, [[Simonchu]]. While early demands were for Chris to edit his old strips to remove Simonla entirely from continuity, later Evan consented to letting Chris keep Simonla's early appearances, on the grounds that he kill her at a later date. Chris, not surprisingly, totally lost his shit, showing a much stronger emotional attachment to a flat, one-dimensional fictional character than he has managed for anyone other than his [[Patti Chandler|fucking dog]]. Finally, after being faced with severe legal action, Chris finally killed Simonla in [[Sonichu 10]], though not before she laid an egg with her husband Wild (though, of course, their wedding and the act of laying the egg were never shown, or even mentioned), which hatched into [[Sandy Rosechu]].

It should be noted that, as revealed in the [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Calls]], Chris considers cartoon characters to be real. Not figuratively, not essentially: ''literally'' real, living creatures that exist in some other world reminiscent of Toon Town from "Who Framed Roger Rabbit?" Simonla's death was as real to him as that of any of his family members or sweethearts... perhaps even more so.

===[[Bob|Bob Chandler]] and [[Barbara Chandler]]===
Coming soon... Both are well into their "Silver Years" and suffering from many heath issues, compounded by their age. It doesn't help that they're [[Tour of Chris's House|living in a landfill]]. As of March 01, 2010, Bob is in the hospital with congestive heart failure, owing to his age, [[McDonald's|diet]] and lifestyle. In the Twitter announcing Bob's heart failure, Chris has stated that he believes his father will survive and showed more concern for the [[stress]] he was under than his own father's health. The inevitable might happen soon...

==See also==
*[[Autism]]
*[[White_knight#Chris_lacks_empathy_himself|Lack of empathy]]
*[[Death threats]]

==References==
<references />

{{Chris and}}

[[Category:Chris-chan]]
[[Category:Dead]]

Talk:Hot Wheels

2010-04-09T20:43:06Z

BADavid: /* Gallery */ new section

==To do==
This isn't going to be an amusing article - Chris doesn't seem to have done much in recent years with this, perhaps one of the few things Chris has actually grown out of (as opposed to growing into like My Little Pony). However, the original Sonichu site had a Hot Wheels subsection, he's made several Pokemon cards alluding to Hot Wheels, he's gotten shitloads of them at Christmas and his birthday, and there's that Sonichu painted Hot Wheels car. But it is a side of Chris people have seemed to ignore (perhaps rightly so, but as we say, '''no shit is too minor''') and it seems to warrant at least a token mention. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 21:28, 9 July 2009 (CEST)

== Gallery ==

I removed the image CWCSlickRacer.jpg because it wasn't a Hot Wheels car but a LEGO Racers tiny turbo custom (it appears to use pieces from [http://www.brickset.com/detail/?Set=8644-1 this 2005 set]) - obviously this means there's only one picture in the gallery now, and as it doesn't seem as if Chris is into Hot Wheels to any notable degree, would it be worth deleting the gallery altogether and just incorporating the Sonichu car into the rest of the article? --[[User:BADavid|BADavid]] 20:43, 9 April 2010 (UTC)

Hot Wheels

2010-04-09T20:39:33Z

BADavid: Removed Image:CWCSlickRacer.jpg - not a Hot Wheels car but actually a LEGO Racers "tiny turbo" custom from approx. 2006

[[Hot Wheels]] are a toy car line which [[Chris]] seemed to show much interest in until his late teens.

He has made custom Hot Wheels cars, such as his [[Sonichu]] Hot Wheels car, parodied as merchandise on [[Jimmy Hill|Jimmy Hill's]] Sonichu page. He originally had a Hot Wheels page as a sub-site to his main Sonichu site, and several fake cards he has made dealt with Hot Wheels related things.

Today, Chris has not shown much interest in Hot Wheels. This is probably one of the very few things Chris "grew out of."

==Gallery==
{{incomplete}}
<center>
<gallery>
Image:Sonchucar2.jpg|Chris's custom Sonichu Hot Wheels car.
</gallery>
</center>

[[Category:Hobbies]]