CWCki - User contributions [en]

SHE IS MINE NOW

2022-12-14T17:48:48Z

Baxter:

{{Honest}}

[[Image:Crazy.jpg|thumb|"I will kick your asses. Because I'm crazy."]]

'''SHE IS MINE NOW''' (officially '''10292009 - Re to Chris No 2 - SHE IS MINE NOW''') is another call out to [[CChanSonichuCWC|the real Chris]] from [[Ian Brandon Anderson]], uploaded on 28 [[October 2009]]. In it, he [[Chris and music#Rap|raps]] again and declares that [[Kacey]] is his and that Liquid lost her.

Ian plays a wide array of Aerosmith tracks in the background, undoubtedly in an attempt to seem rebellious and dangerous. He [[Autism|shuffles]] back and forth throughout the video and seems to have aged considerably since [[For Chris No 2|''yesterday'']]. He also finally changed his shirt.

He also does his [[Donald Duck impersonation]]...that or another [[rage]] attack. Who knows?

It is also important to note that Ian seems to be sweating a fair amount in this video and can be seen wiping sweat from his brow. The sweating appears to become more profuse towards the end of the video compared to the somewhat dry start.

==Original video from the real Chris==
{{Infobox/Liquid
| name = BACK THE FUCK OFF KACEY, OR I WILL DESTROY YOU
| ytid = {{#ev:youtube|3Q-1aHvLXnE}}
| stardate = 28 [[October 2009]]
| maker = [[Liquid Chris]]
| subject = {{Sex|[[Kacey]]}}
| style = {{Rage|text}}
| previous = [[For Chris|THIS will NOT STAND, you HOMO JERK]]
| next = [[SHE_IS_MINE_NOW#MC CWC responds|MC CWC responds]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
--ut'n, don't wanna play nice, do ya?! I'll school ya! [''Jump cut''] I'll s--I'll s--I'll school ya. I'll take you to town!

[''Liquid Chris steps back from the camera and performs several fighting moves similar to the ones seen in [[CWC Fighter]].'']

I'm comin' for ya!

[''Re-approaches camera'']

I am the only one here who is fit for [[Kacey]]! [''Jump cut''] And another thing! [''Jump cut''] Uhh. Yeah this one's for you.

[''Steps away from the camera'']

The real deal! '''[[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|Curse-Ye-Ha-Me-HAAAAAAAA!!]]'''

[''Jump cut. Liquid Chris is close to the camera again.'']

Oh and by the way. I have been talking to some people named [[Jack Thaddeus]] and [[Gregg Mays]], who have told me personally, that they are going to help me take you down! [''Heavy breathing, possibly due to the extreme cold''] And, uh, yeah! Jack Thaddeus, his assistant Samanda Handroil, Samantha Handroil and Gregg Mays, who is a good man, and what ha-has given me some information on you, so that uh- I don't think- I don't think you'll like it very much at- mmmh [''More heavy breathing''] I don't think you will- I don't think you would like it very much if it got out and ruined your life forever.

So yeah. Jack Thaddeus, Gregg Mays. They're on my side now. Mmm. So get ready, arch-nemesis. I will be waiting. And to the rest of you, peace, eh.

==Ian's video==
{{tardrage}}
{{Infobox/video
| name = SHE IS MINE NOW
| video = {{#ev:youtube|9H1ZQ-dzTuo}}
| stardate = 29 [[October 2009]]
| subject = {{Music|text}}, {{Violence|text}}, {{Galpals|[[Kacey]]}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Rage|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| saga = {{Liquid|text}}
| shirt = {{TanWideLines|text}}
| previous = [[Clyde's Buddy Matt Getting SUPER-LAID!!!|Clyde's Buddy Matt <br/>Getting SUPER-LAID!!!]]
| next = [[Clyde is Weaker than Water]]
}}

{{quote|<poem>You just a dang dummy!
And you still chicken you's a dang coward!
If you wanna come fight me
Come fight me in person
Come out from behind the camera you fool
I'll fight you any day!</poem>|MC Chris, [[Chris and music|"rhyming"]]}}

=== Transcript ===

Yo! MC Chris! I'm gonna rap it to ya, man! Listen up!

<poem>
[''Ian begins "rapping" while Run-DMC's cover of "Walk This Way" plays in the background'']
I seen yo video, yous a lame ass
[[Sonichu (comic)|You done copyin' this and that]]
[[homos|I'm gonna screw you]], I'm gonna take you to town
Who do you think you are, [[South Park|Eric Cartman]]?
[''does a surprisingly okay Eric Cartman impression''] Screw you guys, I'm going home!
You had all with the [[pedofork|sweet little girl]]
[[List of Chris's lies|And yet you break your promise!]]
You done turn your back on her and turn to the [[trolls]]!
You just a dang dummy!
And you still chicken you's a dang coward!
If you wanna come fight me,
Come fight me in person!
Come out from behind the camera, you FOOL!
I'll fight you any day!
[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|Poop]]-pow! [''flails arms in an obscene mockery of punching'']
And I'm gonna just plain kick yo ass!
From-looking-at-your-body-type, you's a total width and shorter than me!
I'm a good 5 foot 10, what are you, like a 4 foots 8?
I tell you something right now
[[Virgin with rage|That ain't gonna let you laid]],
Yet you had it once with her and you let it down
You's a big ol' dang...[[Hello, Juffalo|stupid lame-ass clown]].
Because you know you had all the [[Chris and religion|blessings]]
She was smart she was sweet she was [[Speech impediment|riwwyvery]] fun!
And I'll tell ya what ya did...
You...she done left you boy!
You lost her! You [[Kimmi|treated her like]] [[Clown Doll|a dang ragdoll]]!

[''Changes track to Aerosmith's "Rag Doll"''] Dang ragdoll...
And she ain't no ragdoll, she's a caring human being!
And you is--and you is a dang fool for mistreating her like you did.
And I [[love]] her for--I love her for so much more than that.
And you so dumb...and you threw it all away, man.
She left you and now she's with me.
</poem>

[''Changes track to Aerosmith's "Dream On"''] So, at this point, you could just... [''turns back and awkwardly fast forwards through the intro to the song, and wipes his forehead''] So, at this point man. I'll tell you what you could do, because all your notions you had...with lovely, with sweet [[Kacey]]. This point, you could just...[[Dreams|dream]] on. Cause she and I we share [''Changes track to Aerosmith's "Sweet Emotion".'']

[''In an ear-splitting high pitched whine, while holding up the [[Claw of Fail]]''] SWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET EMOOOOOOOOOTION. You didn't share no sweet emotion. You just done played her for a fool. And I don't ca--and I don't take to fools like that. [''whispers''] Please don't. I swear. And by the way you know what? I don't care about bein' a virgin because you know what? She and me are gonna be like...

[''Changes track to Aerosmith's "Love in an Elevator"''] ...[[Sonichu_8#The_Elevator_Gags|LOVE IN AN ELEVATOR! LOVIN' IT UP IN AN ELEVATOR!]] I mean, I tell ya. I tell ya what, man. She done leave you--she done left yous mang. She come--she come towards me. Because she's beyond beautiful.

[''Changes track to "Beyond Beautiful" from the Aerosmith Track Pack, awkwardly fast forwards through intro again and then <s>sings</s> mumbles along, badly''] She loves me now, she loves you not! Listen to that! Listen to the words of Aerosmith! She's beyond beautiful, and she's beyond...brilliant. She is so kind. She cares a lot. She cared about you, too. But you done turned her down, man. You lost her. So face facts man. She's with me Mac- she is with me now. You're yesterday's news. Just like the- just like the [[Monthly tugboat|boat]] that the [[Random access humor|MythBusters made out of newspaper and ice.]] Yesterday's news. Good show by the way, [[List of Chris's lies|I learned from it.]] So you can just move on, [[Wikipedia:Buster Brown|Buster Brown]]! 'Cause [[Chris|Mama Brown]] ain't gonna take that no more!

Yeah... and I will kick your ass, 'cause... I'm [[autism|crazy]]! [''gibbers violently at the camera, pauses, then does a more effete version of gibbering at the camera'']

C'mon! You come fight me in person, and I'll kick your ass! Come on!

...have a good day. Anse--when you--meet me in person.

==MC CWC responds==
{{Infobox/Liquid
| name = MC CWC responds
| video = {{#ev:youtube|wDMEVOM3pV8}}
| stardate = 29 [[October 2009]]
| maker = [[Liquid Chris]]
| subject = {{Sex|[[Kacey]]}}, {{Music|text}}
| previous = [[SHE_IS_MINE_NOW#Original video from the real Chris|BACK THE FUCK OFF KACEY, OR I WILL DESTROY YOU]]
| next = [[My_Half_of_A_Whole_New_World_for_Kacey#CChanSonichu CWC responds|My Half of A Whole New World For Kacey]]
}}

{{quote|Then I'm gonna turn you into a murder statistic,
Because, bitch<br>
I'm High-Fucking-Functioning-Autistic|MC CWC, being '''fucking ill.'''}}

=== Transcript ===
[[Image:Ian responds to MC CWC.jpg|thumb|Ian's comments on Chris's Response.]]
Kacey, you understand, this… this Ian, this… you do not want anything to have to do with him. I will win you back! I promise!

And another thing, I am gonna show you who is the real, who is the real better, talented CWC, in order to, in order to get you back! Cuz I will have you back, bay-bee! I miss you!

Here he is MC – the MC CWC, throwin’ down his favorite rhymes y’all! Yeah, okay.

[''The beat from [[Wikipedia:Eminem|Eminem's]] "[[Wikipedia:My Name Is|My Name Is]]" begins playing (yes, just the beat, because Liquid Chris can actually play songs with the lyrics cut out)'']

''Kacey doesn’t love you – it’s true!<br>
''I checked her email this Tuesday at seven-oh-two<br>
''She has more apprehension than someone like you<br>
''Having his [[semen]], and [[recycling|drinking it too]]<br>
''In orange [[CWC Cola|Fanta, chocolate syrup]], you just can’t refuse<br>
''Mothafuckas online think that it cannot be true<br>
''But you prove them wrong, bottoms-up is yo motto<br>
''So it slides down yo throat, like a melty gelato<br>
''Wearin’ that bathrobe, like greener than avocado<br>
''Mashed up in a bathtub, infested with live mold<br>
''Your [[ShowerClean|shower]] got a problem with that, so I been told<br>
''In fact I’ve seen it – you’re twenty-seven years old!<br>
''You get [[CWCFlyingElephants|naked on camera and dance around like ten-fold]]<br>
''Fuck you, [[niggos|nigga]] – you makin’ my head explode<br>
''You know, with the stop-this and the stop-that<br>
''And the [[Nudes|expose of your ass-crack]]<br>
''On the camera, it was so wack<br>
''Look like Jack Black, on your last track<br>
''Mothafucka, I’ve never tried kickin’ an ass this hard<br>
''But I’mmabout to chew up and spit y’all about one million yards<br>
''I’ll take yo picture and send it to yo bodyguard<br>
''Now everybody yeah, sing along<br>

''Now everybody drawin’ the [[comic]] pages for ages<br>
''The sages of rage, and the age of contagion’s voracious<br>
''And pages, like the mothafuckin plague is<br>
''Upon a plantation and faces just can’t explain this<br>

''Sorry – didn’t understand that?<br>
''Understand my ass-crack!<br>
''I’m [[Wikipedia:Back in Black|back in black]] – and so’s my battery<br>
''Runs on [[Wikipedia:AC/DC|AC/DC]],<br>
''You don’t deserve to listen to a band so legendary,<br>
''[[Captain's Log, Stardate March 27th, 2009|Get the FUCK off]] of Kacey,<br>
''Blaze me? You’re pasty!<br>
''You can’t stop me, or block me, or amaze me.<br>
''You won’t even [[Rescuing Kacey From Christian W Chandler|come to her rescue]], ‘cuz you’re lazy!<br>
''It doesn’t phase me that you’re crazy,<br>
''‘Cuz if I see you try to contain me,<br>
''Then when I kick your ass, and salt and shake thee<br>

''I’m gonna rip off<br>
''Your four-inch<br>
''[[Duck|Deformed dick]]<br>

''[[BlueSpike#Max|Shove it up your ass]]<br>
''Like a certain<br>
''[[Medallion of fail|Medallion]]<br>

''Then I’m gonna turn you into<br>
''A murder<br>
''Statistic<br>

''Because, bitch,<br>
''I’m High-Fucking-Functioning-Autistic.<br>

''Out!<br>

Yeah. M’kay. Yeah yeah, yeah, m’kay, yeah you listen to that and you take in the words from that.

Peace, and have a good day.

==External Links==
Download Liquid Chris's rap - Created by Youtuber CynicalController https://www.dropbox.com/s/5x4pdw699q1cf3p/Rhymes%20to%20Win%20Kacey%20Back.mp3?dl=0

==See also==
*[[A-U-T-I-S-M]]
*[[My Half of A Whole New World for Kacey]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Clyde's Buddy Matt Getting SUPER-LAID!!!]]|nextlink=[[Clyde is Weaker than Water]]|}}
{{Music Videos}}
{{The Cwcivil War of 2009}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]
[[Category:Videos with RAGE]]
[[Category:Yo! CWC Raps]]

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, October 2009| 2009-10-28]]
[[Category:Liquid Saga videos| 2009-10-28]]

Talk:I`m sorry for the lack of mic audio in the Destiny Stream

2016-03-29T21:50:47Z

Baxter: Created page with "==Pure, uncut, premium CWC== This video is fucking hilarious. ~~~~"

==Pure, uncut, premium CWC==

This video is fucking hilarious. [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] ([[User talk:Baxter|talk]]) 21:50, 29 March 2016 (UTC)

Ian Brandon Anderson

2016-01-14T00:14:32Z

Baxter:

{{Articleofthenow}}
{{Protip|Only call Chris "Ian" in articles related to the [[Liquid Chris]] saga. Anywhere else just gets annoying.}}
[[Image:JAELou2.jpg|thumb|IBA Chandler sniper rifle.]]

'''Ian Brandon Anderson''' was a name given to [[Chris]] in late [[2009]] as part of an in-joke during the [[Liquid Chris]] saga. When Liquid first showed up, his gimmick was that he was supposedly the ''real'' Christian Weston Chandler, and that the CChanSonichu account on [[YouTube]] had been hacked by an impostor a short while ago, and it was the impostor who was now operating the '''IBAChandler''' account and pretending to be the real Chris. In this narrative, Ian Brandon Anderson was supposedly the real name of the impostor.

==The name==
The name originated from the first 3 initials in Chris's new YouTube screen name. As Chris later explained, the real meaning of IBAChandler was that it was a magnificently stupid wordplay joke, meaning "I Be a Chandler", as in "I, Christian, am one of the Chandlers" (inspired by [[Bob]]'s old license plate, which read "IBMRC" [I Be Mr. C]). However, when Chris later uploaded [[Rollin' and Trollin']], he gave the real [[trolls]] ammunition to use against him, as they were able to support Liquid's claims of being the [[TRUE and HONEST]] Chris-Chan, whilst claiming that the actual Chris was really a troll, and using the video as proof of their claims. During this, one of the many YouTube trolls involved came up with the idea that IBA was actually an acronym for the impostor's real name, deciding that it meant Ian Brandon Anderson. Liquid himself later picked up on this and began accusing Chris of being Ian as well, leading directly into the rest of the Liquid Saga, such as the [[SingStar Challenge]] and the conflict over [[Kacey]].

==Chris's reaction==
Of course, suggesting that Chris was anything other than the true and honest Christian Weston Chandler was a serious insult to him. Every instance of Liquid calling him Ian in [[Kacey and Liquid Call|phone calls]] or in a video would cause Chris to rage and scream about how he was the real Christian, resulting in such humorous videos as [[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!]] in which he screamed the infamous phrase "I NAME IS NOT IAN...[[Speech impediment|BRANNAN]]...SOMETHING!!!".

When Chris later included Liquid as a character in the [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'' comic]], his character's name was [[Liquid Chris|IBAChandler]], just like the YouTube screen name.<ref>http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_9/Page_79</ref>

Though Chris did [[tard rage]] over being called Ian several times during the Liquid Saga, it should be noted that he only ever reacted to Liquid calling him as such. In spite of what you may think, [[weens]] commenting on Chris's YouTube channels and calling his [[14 Branchland Court|house]] to [[Prank calls|scream into his phone]] has done nothing to Chris, because he doesn't care either way.

<center>{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Denial: The Ian Brandon Anderson Story (trailer)
| video = {{#ev:youtube|iS42GGu2f2o}}
| Stardate = 29 [[November 2009]]
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/GodAndTheBearFilms GodAndTheBearFilms]
| Subject = Ian Brandon Anderson
| Video Type = Moch-Trailer
}}</center>

==References==
<references/>

==See also==
*[[Liquid Chris]] - The first person to call Chris Ian to his face
*[[Asperchu]] - Which used Ian jokes on occasion
*[[Singstar Challenge]] - In which Liquid called Chris Ian several times
*[[Rollin' and Trollin']] - The catalyst for the original Ian meme
*[[CWC Trollin More]] - Chris's attempt to die the Ian name down, which failed

{{Stub}}
{{The Cwcivil War of 2009}}

[[Category:Liquid Saga]]
[[Category:Chris's alter egos]]

Talk:Weens

2015-01-06T23:31:08Z

Baxter: /* Glorious */ new section

.

== Another [[Liquid Chris]] ==

I've been trying to find a link to put in the "it's already been done" section in here. It was a link for a channel that was basically some sadsack's attempt to become the next [[Liquid Chris]]. Needless to say, it backfired spectacularly. I can't find a link to it, for some reason.

== Trollfiction/art ==

I personally don't think that making trollfiction and troll art of Chris and sonichu would constitute as weening unless it was made specifically to show to him.

Should we make this change? [[User:Ell96|Xalver nick]] ([[User talk:Ell96|talk]]) 12:53, 6 January 2015 (UTC)

: The article doesn't say that ''all'' fanfic and fanart related to Chris/Sonichu counts as weenery, just the "edgy" stuff intended to either point out all the little problems with the Sonichu comics, or just be as shocking and disturbing as possible. It's perfectly possible to only make that stuff for the enjoyment of other trolls, and yet still come across as a tryhard ween. --[[User:HarryHowler|HarryHowler]] ([[User talk:HarryHowler|talk]]) 13:59, 6 January 2015 (UTC)

== Glorious ==

Just want to say that whoever wrote this page is insightful, intelligent and a good writer to boot. [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] ([[User talk:Baxter|talk]]) 23:31, 6 January 2015 (UTC)

File talk:RanColemanYeatts-WakeForestHowler1961.png

2013-02-20T01:30:00Z

Baxter: Created page with "Those glasses are fucking killer."

Those glasses are fucking killer.

/cow/

2012-11-23T19:47:16Z

Baxter:

[[Image:Redbackground.jpg|thumb|All it took was words and a red gradient to keep Chris away]]
{{Quote|Would you fuck me, 789chan? I'd fuck me.|Chris, [[It's not that cold]]}}
:''[[cwc]] redirects here. For other uses, see [[Christian Weston Chandler (disambiguation)]].''
'''/cwc/''' (aka '''Krapple''', '''Legi0n''', '''789chan''' or '''/cow/''') was an image board dedicated to [[Chris]] and other lolcows.

[[Ivy]] has alleged that Chris had discovered the site, based on a tip off from a successful [[white knight]], but his response was that the [[CWCipedia|colors]] [[CWC's Sonichu Site!|bothered]] him and that there were "[[Autism|too many words]]."

Chris made direct reference to the 789chan incarnation of /cwc/ in the video [[It's not that cold]], asking if they'd fuck him. In the video, he also pretends to dig up his dead dog [[Patti Chandler]] and wear her as a coat. This is also a reference to the /cwc/ board, as a vocal minority of users in Legi0n era /cwc/ kept suggesting that the [[trolls]] should hire a [[Tomgirl|tranny hooker]] to dig up Patti, as a way of trolling Chris. How much Chris actually knows about 789chan or whether or not he browses the board remains to be seen.

== History ==
[[Image:anonchris.jpg|thumb|Typical /cwc/ user]]
/cwc/ was originally set up on the Krapple board, but on 1 [[November 2009]], /cwc/, as well as the entire board, was permanently deleted for CEO having ''terabytes'' of [[anime]] on server space. It was brought back soon after on a spin-off chan on Legi0n. Legi0n also later shut down due to some drama with some of its admins in [[August 2010]], and the board was moved once more to 789chan, where it is currently hosted. While hosted at 789chan, /cwc/ was re-purposed as a general lolcows board rather than a Chris-centric one, though Chris still remains the most popular topic and the board's namesake. The administrator of 789chan tired of running the website, and decided to let the project die in [[November 2012]]. This probably comes as no surprise to the users as a few months previous he explained this was soon to happen and that he was burned out from the project. Almost immediately after the loss of 789chan, a shifty Mexican business man rebuilt the site with similar code, calling the new board /cow/. He also received a lot of the original staff. Anybody who wishes to continue discussing lolcows on a crappy imageboard will be happy to come to n0chan and do so.

==Derivative boards==
Due to the high volume of posts on /cwc/, the Legi0n staff decided to create additional, more specific chris-related boards. '''/cxc/''' (fanfics and copypastas), '''/kcwc/''' (chris-related songs/music videos), '''/CWCrt/''' (trolling schemes), and''' /library/''' (to archive threads of major importance). The move to 789chan eventually dropped all of these boards, while adding /L/ in place of /library/.

==Other==
/cwc/ also operated an IRC channel and a dedicated trolling wiki back in the Legi0n days. The wiki and IRC channel have both since shut down, but 789chan now runs a new IRC located [irc://irc.789chan.org:6667/789chan here].

== External links ==
*[http://n0chan.com/cow/ /cwc/'s current incarnation]
*[http://www.mediafire.com/?myc11iitiw6ud Archive on Mediafire]
*[irc://irc.789chan.org:6667/789chan 789chan IRC, the new /cwc/ channel]
*[http://encyclopediadramatica.se/Legi0n ED article on Legi0n]
*[https://encyclopediadramatica.se/789chan ED article on 789chan]
{{DEFAULTSORT:cwc}}
[[Category:Websites]]
[[Category:Trolling]]

Main Page

2012-11-01T05:40:36Z

Baxter:

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| <h2 id="mp-otd-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cedff2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3b0bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">PSN Tracker</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{PSNTracker}}</div>
|-
| <h2 id="mp-otd-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cedff2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3b0bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">CWCki News</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{CWCki News}}</div>
|-
| <h2 id="mp-otd-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cedff2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3b0bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Improvement Project of the Now</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Improvement}}</div>
|}
|}
{| id="mp-lower" style="margin:4px 0 0 0; width:100%; background:none;"

| class="MainPageBG" style="width:55%; border:1px solid #ddcef2; background:#faf5ff; vertical-align:top;"|
{| id="mp-left" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="width:100%; vertical-align:top; background:#faf5ff;"
| <h2 id="mp-tfp-h2" style="margin:0; background:#ddcef2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #afa3bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Picture of the Now</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Picture of the now}}</div>
|}
| style="border:1px solid transparent;" |

| class="MainPageBG" style="width:45%; border:1px solid #ddcef2; background:#faf5ff; vertical-align:top;"|
{| id="mp-right" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="width:100%; vertical-align:top; background:#faf5ff;"
| <h2 id="mp-tfp-h2" style="margin:0; background:#ddcef2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #afa3bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em">Video of the Now</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Video of the now}}</div>
|}
|}

__NOTOC____NOEDITSECTION__

[[Category:Special]]

Main Page

2012-11-01T05:40:07Z

Baxter:

{| id="mp-tfp" style="margin:4px 0 0 0; width:100%; background:none;"
| class="MainPageBG" style="width:100%; border:1px solid #ddcef2; background:#faf5ff; vertical-align:top; color:#000;"|
{| cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="vertical-align:top; background:#faf5ff; color:#000; width:100%"
! <h2 id="mp-tfp-h2" style="margin:0; background:#ddcef2; font-size:1200%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #afa3bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em">I'm just not ready for a relationship with you, Jimmy.</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | {{Quote of the now}}


{| id="mp-topbanner" style="width:100%; background:#fcfcfc; margin-top:1.2em; border:1px solid #ccc;"
| style="width:100%; color:#000;" |

{| style="width:100%; border:none; background:none;"
| style="width:50%; text-align:center; white-space:nowrap; color:#000;" |
<div style="font-size:162%; border:none; margin:0; padding:.1em; color:#000;">Welcome to the [[CWCki]]!</div>
<div style="top:+0.2em; font-size:95%;">The [[TRUE and HONEST]] encyclopedia about [[Christian Weston Chandler]].</div>
<div style="top:+0.2em; font-size:95%;">''WHERE NO SHIT IS TOO MINOR!''</div>
<div id="articlecount" style="width:100%; text-align:center; font-size:85%;">We currently have [[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] articles...and counting!</div>
|}

| style="width:50%; font-size:100%;" |
[[File:CWCiki Introduction.jpg]]
|}

{| id="mp-tfp" style="margin:4px 0 0 0; width:100%; background:none;"
| class="MainPageBG" style="width:100%; border:1px solid #ddcef2; background:#faf5ff; vertical-align:top; color:#000;"|
{| cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="vertical-align:top; background:#faf5ff; color:#000; width:100%"
! <h2 id="mp-tfp-h2" style="margin:0; background:#ddcef2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #afa3bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em">Quote of the Now</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | {{Quote of the now}}
|}
|}

{| id="mp-tfp" style="margin:4px 0 0 0; width:100%; background:none;"
| class="MainPageBG" style="width:100%; border:1px solid #EEDC82; background:#FFE4B5; vertical-align:top; color:#000;"|
{| cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="vertical-align:top; background:#FFE4B5; color:#000; width:100%"
| style="color:#000;" | {{Check this out}}
|}
|}

{| id="mp-upper" style="margin:0 0 0 0; background:none;"
| class="MainPageBG" style="width:55%; border:1px solid #cef2e0; background:#f5fffa; vertical-align:top; color:#000;" |
{| id="mp-left" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="width:100%; vertical-align:top; background:#f5fffa;"
| <h2 id="mp-dyk-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cef2e0; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3bfb1; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Article of the Now</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Article of the now}}</div>
|-
| <h2 id="mp-dyk-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cef2e0; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3bfb1; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">This Day in Christory</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Christory}}</div>
|-
| <h2 id="mp-dyk-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cef2e0; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3bfb1; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Did You Know...</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Did you know}}</div>
|}
| style="border:1px solid transparent;" |

| class="MainPageBG" style="width:45%; border:1px solid #cedff2; background:#f5faff; vertical-align:top;"|
{| id="mp-right" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="width:100%; vertical-align:top; background:#f5faff;"
| <h2 id="mp-otd-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cedff2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3b0bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Da Update</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Da update}}</div>
|-
| <h2 id="mp-otd-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cedff2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3b0bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">PSN Tracker</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{PSNTracker}}</div>
|-
| <h2 id="mp-otd-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cedff2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3b0bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">CWCki News</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{CWCki News}}</div>
|-
| <h2 id="mp-otd-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cedff2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3b0bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Improvement Project of the Now</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Improvement}}</div>
|}
|}
{| id="mp-lower" style="margin:4px 0 0 0; width:100%; background:none;"

| class="MainPageBG" style="width:55%; border:1px solid #ddcef2; background:#faf5ff; vertical-align:top;"|
{| id="mp-left" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="width:100%; vertical-align:top; background:#faf5ff;"
| <h2 id="mp-tfp-h2" style="margin:0; background:#ddcef2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #afa3bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Picture of the Now</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Picture of the now}}</div>
|}
| style="border:1px solid transparent;" |

| class="MainPageBG" style="width:45%; border:1px solid #ddcef2; background:#faf5ff; vertical-align:top;"|
{| id="mp-right" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="width:100%; vertical-align:top; background:#faf5ff;"
| <h2 id="mp-tfp-h2" style="margin:0; background:#ddcef2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #afa3bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em">Video of the Now</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Video of the now}}</div>
|}
|}

__NOTOC____NOEDITSECTION__

[[Category:Special]]

Main Page

2012-11-01T05:39:00Z

Baxter:

{| id="mp-tfp" style="margin:4px 0 0 0; width:100%; background:none;"
| class="MainPageBG" style="width:100%; border:1px solid #ddcef2; background:#faf5ff; vertical-align:top; color:#000;"|
{| cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="vertical-align:top; background:#faf5ff; color:#000; width:100%"
! <h2 id="mp-tfp-h2" style="margin:0; background:#ddcef2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #afa3bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em">I'm just not ready for a relationship with you, Jimmy.</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | {{Quote of the now}}


{| id="mp-topbanner" style="width:100%; background:#fcfcfc; margin-top:1.2em; border:1px solid #ccc;"
| style="width:100%; color:#000;" |

{| style="width:100%; border:none; background:none;"
| style="width:50%; text-align:center; white-space:nowrap; color:#000;" |
<div style="font-size:162%; border:none; margin:0; padding:.1em; color:#000;">Welcome to the [[CWCki]]!</div>
<div style="top:+0.2em; font-size:95%;">The [[TRUE and HONEST]] encyclopedia about [[Christian Weston Chandler]].</div>
<div style="top:+0.2em; font-size:95%;">''WHERE NO SHIT IS TOO MINOR!''</div>
<div id="articlecount" style="width:100%; text-align:center; font-size:85%;">We currently have [[Special:Statistics|{{NUMBEROFARTICLES}}]] articles...and counting!</div>
|}

| style="width:50%; font-size:100%;" |
[[File:CWCiki Introduction.jpg]]
|}

{| id="mp-tfp" style="margin:4px 0 0 0; width:100%; background:none;"
| class="MainPageBG" style="width:100%; border:1px solid #ddcef2; background:#faf5ff; vertical-align:top; color:#000;"|
{| cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="vertical-align:top; background:#faf5ff; color:#000; width:100%"
! <h2 id="mp-tfp-h2" style="margin:0; background:#ddcef2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #afa3bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em">Quote of the Now</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | {{Quote of the now}}
|}
|}

{| id="mp-tfp" style="margin:4px 0 0 0; width:100%; background:none;"
| class="MainPageBG" style="width:100%; border:1px solid #EEDC82; background:#FFE4B5; vertical-align:top; color:#000;"|
{| cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="vertical-align:top; background:#FFE4B5; color:#000; width:100%"
| style="color:#000;" | {{Check this out}}
|}
|}

{| id="mp-upper" style="margin:0 0 0 0; background:none;"
| class="MainPageBG" style="width:55%; border:1px solid #cef2e0; background:#f5fffa; vertical-align:top; color:#000;" |
{| id="mp-left" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="width:100%; vertical-align:top; background:#f5fffa;"
| <h2 id="mp-dyk-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cef2e0; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3bfb1; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Article of the Now</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Article of the now}}</div>
|-
| <h2 id="mp-dyk-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cef2e0; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3bfb1; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">This Day in Christory</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Christory}}</div>
|-
| <h2 id="mp-dyk-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cef2e0; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3bfb1; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Did You Know...</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Did you know}}</div>
|}
| style="border:1px solid transparent;" |

| class="MainPageBG" style="width:45%; border:1px solid #cedff2; background:#f5faff; vertical-align:top;"|
{| id="mp-right" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="width:100%; vertical-align:top; background:#f5faff;"
| <h2 id="mp-otd-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cedff2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3b0bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Da Update</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Da update}}</div>
|-
| <h2 id="mp-otd-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cedff2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3b0bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">PSN Tracker</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{PSNTracker}}</div>
|-
| <h2 id="mp-otd-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cedff2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3b0bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">CWCki News</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{CWCki News}}</div>
|-
| <h2 id="mp-otd-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cedff2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3b0bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Improvement Project of the Now</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Improvement}}</div>
|}
|}
{| id="mp-lower" style="margin:4px 0 0 0; width:100%; background:none;"

| class="MainPageBG" style="width:55%; border:1px solid #ddcef2; background:#faf5ff; vertical-align:top;"|
{| id="mp-left" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="width:100%; vertical-align:top; background:#faf5ff;"
| <h2 id="mp-tfp-h2" style="margin:0; background:#ddcef2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #afa3bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Picture of the Now</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Picture of the now}}</div>
|}
| style="border:1px solid transparent;" |

| class="MainPageBG" style="width:45%; border:1px solid #ddcef2; background:#faf5ff; vertical-align:top;"|
{| id="mp-right" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="width:100%; vertical-align:top; background:#faf5ff;"
| <h2 id="mp-tfp-h2" style="margin:0; background:#ddcef2; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #afa3bf; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em">Video of the Now</h2>
|-
| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Video of the now}}</div>
|}
|}

__NOTOC____NOEDITSECTION__

[[Category:Special]]

Cherokian Clan

2012-01-31T10:51:59Z

Baxter: Undo revision 155948 by Cleftpalete (talk)

{{Articleofthenow}}
[[Image:Chrisansestore.jpg|thumb|Cherokians have heads bigger than their torsos, arms thicker than their legs, and still manage to wear ill-fitting clothing. Seriously.]]

{{Quote|I am 1/32 Cherokee. I do not currently live on a reservation, yet I think a lot of us Native Americans do live on Reservations.|Chris, [[Regina e-mails]]}}
{{Quote|I will admit, my knowledge of the Cherokees can be better.|Chris, [[Mailbag 8]]}}

[[Chris]] claims to have at least one ancestor who is [[Wikipedia:Cherokee|Cherokee]]. Thus, the '''Cherokian Clan''' is the tribe he believes this ancestor belongs to. The ancient exploits of the clan figure heavily into the mythology of the ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' comics.

The primary rival tribe of the Cherokian Clan was the [[Wasabi Clan]], which Chris stole from ''[[Wikipedia:Naruto|Naruto]]''.

==Fictional history==
Apparently living in what is now [[Virginia]] many centuries ago, the Cherokians (pronounced [tʃəˈɹɑkiən] - chuh-rock-ee-uhns by Chris) possessed considerable mystical powers and skill for prophecy. [[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan|The Cherokee leader]], Christian's ancestor, wore a coveted [[Cherokian crown]] which somewhat resembled the ears of [[Sonichu]], suggesting that there is [[Transformers|more than meets the eye]] to Christian's creation.

The Cherokians and Wasabi fought frequently over both the crown and the [[Queen of the Cherokian Clan|Cherokian queen]], whom the [[Wasabi Rival|Wasabi leader]] wanted as his own. Despite this, the Cherokians and Wasabi joined forces to defeat and imprison their mutual enemy, [[Count Graduon]].

Recognizing that Graduon could someday again threaten mankind, the Cherokians wrote the [[Anchuent Prophecy]], describing the exact circumstances of Graduon's escape and the identity of the individuals who would summon the power to defeat him. The prophecy was locked away in the Destiny Cave somewhere near the future site of [[CWCville]], Virginia, along with the Fireshock Pendant and Lightning Bracelets that would empower two of the three "[[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|electric creatures]]" fated to stop Graduon.

==Seriously?==
Chris is among a very large number of [[America]]ns — most of whom aren't autistic man-children — who claim to have some distant [[Wikipedia:Native American|Native American]] heritage. In particular, it is especially common for many white and [[Niggos|black]] people, and especially in the South, to specifically claim Cherokee heritage. How accurate all of those claims are is another matter. At least in some cases, it is more likely that the "Cherokee ancestor" is a cover for having a distant Black ancestor (if the person claiming the ancestry is White) or White ancestry (if the person claiming it is Black).

Chris has actually given multiple values for how much Cherokee blood he has; for example, in Chris's emails to [[Jackie E-mails 16|Jackie]], he says multiple times that he's actually 1/16 Cherokee Indian, but then in the [[Regina e-mails|Regina Emails]], he states he's 1/32 Cherokee. [[Bob]] seems to encourage this response from Chris, saying in the [[Emily]] recording that he is "at least" one fourth Cherokee, claiming that this came from his father. Therefore, no one is truly sure how accurate this is.

In Chris's case, it needs to be noted that he also claims to be descended from [[Anne Boleyn]], whose [[Wikipedia:Elizabeth I of England|only offspring]], as Wikipedia reminds us, died without children. And for someone who takes pride in his Cherokee ancestry, he is remarkably ignorant regarding actual Cherokees, who resemble Chris's Cherokees the way the [[Wikipedia:Atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki|bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki]] resemble the [[Wikipedia:Godzilla (1998 film)|American ''Godzilla'' remake]]. He depicts the [[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan]] as White and blue-eyed, referring to Cherokee artifacts, customs, and people with the dubious demonym "Cherokian," and ''slathering them in '''solid gold''' ''Sonichu''-themed jewelery and armor.'' You know, like so many Indians were known to wear. Interestingly, the large amounts of gold, the decoration, the color, and the overall design makes the character look far more [[Wikipedia:Maya civilization|Mayan]] than anything else.

When a letter in the [[Mailbag]] asked to explain his inaccuracies regarding the Cherokee people and how he came to presenting them in the comics the way he did, Chris offered that he didn't know as much about the Cherokees as he possibly could. He doesn't admit that he was blindingly, mind numbingly ''wrong'', simply that there might be a few facts he glossed over.<ref>[[Mailbag 8]]</ref>

Chris later compared the [[Wikipedia:Trail of Tears|Trail of Tears]], a tragedy in which 4,000 Cherokees and many other Native Americans were killed, to a few pranks in which people on the Internet made fun of him.<ref>[[Mailbag 50]]</ref>

==The Cherokee Respond to Chris's claims about his heritage==

<center>{{#ev:youtube|fRXroiXFTWs}}</center>

== Gallery ==
<center><gallery>
Image:CherokeeChris.jpg|Artist's depiction of Chris celebrating his Cherokee ancestry.
Image:Indiann.jpg|Somehow, the real Chris doing it looks sillier than the troll art.
Image:160-ChrokiChanCard.jpg|[[My Little Pony]] featured heavily in ancient Native American culture.
</gallery></center>

==See also==
*[[War Paint Video]] - Chris pretends to be a real Cherokee to threaten trolls.
*[[ECV 00001]] - Chris reads the Wikipedia article on the Cherokee Clan for several minutes.
*[[Chris and race#Native Americans|Chris and race]] - More analysis of Chris's racism
*[[Megatron Pistol]] - As used by the ancient Cherokees.

==References==
<references/>

==External links==
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UUQ0O7gPKMA Cherokee Chris-chan]

{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:CWC-isms]]
[[Category:Plot Devices]]

Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)

2012-01-31T10:46:57Z

Baxter:

{{Articleofthenow}}
{{Honest}}

[[Image:DVDReleaseCut.jpg|thumb|Chris-chan: Because making a homemade DVD about yourself justifies your existence.]]

'''''Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)''''' is [[Chris's]] homemade DVD, featuring various video clips Chris had made before his Internet fame, and also his actual, if meager, TV appearances. Despite its title, very little of the material on the DVD was ever featured on TV.

Chris originally sent copies of the DVD only to a select few people, but nevertheless thought him making the DVD was an [[Chris and his Ego|important enough achievement]] to mention repeatedly in the [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'' comic]] and elsewhere. He also believed that people would actually be interested of buying a copy along with other merchandise, and even planned a [[Sony|Blu-ray]] release.<ref>[[3 December 2009]]</ref> Suffice to say, the disc was actually burned with a Magnavox DVD recorder out of material that appears to have been transferred off of VHS tapes, and doesn't actually approach commercial quality, even if it actually had any interesting content that people would actually pay for. Chris possibly thinks that lack of content and video quality that was abysmal to begin with will mysteriously look better when burned on [[Sonichu 10|hi-def]] discs.

Naturally, since this relic was so profoundly ''important'' in Chris's mind, it piqued the curiosity of the trolls, and a copy was eventually obtained by [[LordSillynipples]] by posing as Chris's childhood friend and first crush, [[Tiffany Robinson]].

==Tracklisting==

===''C.W.C. On TV'' Trailer===
To reduce marketing costs, Chris put the trailer for the DVD directly into the DVD. The trailer provides a summary of the rest of the features, in case you don't want to melt your brain by actually watching the whole DVD.

===[[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|C.W.C. Super Sonic Winner!!!]]===
From 26 February [[1990s#1994|1994]], shortly after Christian's 12th birthday. Local news coverage of him winning a ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog]]'' contest and earning a $1,000 shopping spree for video games. To date the pinnacle of Christian's entire existence, this event fueled the delusional manchild he is today.

===[[Song of Christian]]===
Filmed on 15 May [[1990s#1998|1998]], when Christian was sixteen. Presented as an episode of ''The Christian Chandler Show'', Christian gives a dramatic reading of a poem he wrote about himself. He then spends twenty minutes explaining the meaning of each line, about fifteen minutes of which is dedicated to him leafing through his [[hand-drawn Nintendo Power magazine|hand-drawn ''Nintendo Power'' magazine]].

===[[Mario Kart 64 Lego Raceway#Prototype|''Mario Kart 64'' LEGO Raceway Prototype]] Animation===

===[[Mario Kart 64 Lego Raceway|''Mario Kart 64'' LEGO Raceway]] Animation by C.W.C. on Game Boy Camera===
Filmed on 4 June [[1990s#1998|1998]].

Hey, do you like ''Mario Kart''? Do you like LEGO Blocks? Do you like stop-motion animation? More importantly, do you like hearing the same fifteen-second clip of music played over and over and over while you watch grainy black-and-white 8-bit footage of LEGO men getting into car wrecks? Then this is the clip for you!

'''SPOILER:''' LEGO Christian wins the race. [[Chris and his Ego|No surprises there.]]

===[[The City of Cwicville Tour!|Unfinished CWCville Tour]]===
Filmed 12 July [[2000s#2001|2001]].

===[[Chris Chan in the PokéNews]]===
[[Image:SlamAttack.jpg|thumb|OH BOY!]]
Filmed 16 October [[1990s#1999|1999]]. The local news media do a fluff piece on the rise of the ''Pokémon'' fandom, and Chris happens to be among the small children playing the game. This clip provides the DVD cover with its money line:

{{quote|I'll send out my Dragonair, even though it has 60 Damage on it. Oh boy! It has 3 Energy on it... Slam Attack!}}

===Christian Chandler's [[Animal Crossing Documentary|''Animal Crossing'' Documentary]]===
Filmed 22 November [[2000s#2003|2003]]. An hour-long video of Christian playing ''Animal Crossing''. If the video is any indication, ''Animal Crossing'' is about as exciting to watch as organizing files in Microsoft Windows.

===[[The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special|C.W.C.'s ''Animal Crossing''/''Mario Paint'' 24th Wedding Anniversary Special]]===
Created in honor of [[Bob]] and [[Barbara]] Chandler's anniversary, on 7 June [[2004]].

===[[So Need a Cute Girl|"So Need A Cute Girl" Music Video]]===
Filmed 20 [[2004#December|December 2004]]. Music video for the lead single off [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (band)|Christian's debut album]].

===Chris Chan's [[Harvey Birdman Commercial|''Harvey Birdman'' Commercial]]===
Filmed 24 February [[2005]]. Christian enters a contest where the goal is to deliver a creative advertisement for a ''Harvey Birdman'' DVD. He instead blathers on about himself, ''Sonichu'', and Mary Lee Walsh. The time constraints laid out in the contest rules are obvious, as Christian struggles to cram his [[random-access humor]] into a thirty-second soundbite so that he sounds like the Micro Machines man.

===Chris Chan's [[Pixelated PS3]]===
Filmed on 28 November [[2006]]. Christian enters another contest requiring him to shill a product in under a minute, this time a PlayStation 3. To answer the question "What would you do for a PS3?", Chris first explains everything he would like to do but won't (e.g., save up the money and go to a store), and would but can't (forsake a cure for autism), before revealing that he has constructed a PS3 from LEGO blocks and [[Pixelblocks]].

===C.W.C.'s SlideShow of Photographs, Art, and Comics===
Still images taken from [[1980s#1982|1982]]-[[2007]] with interspersed commentary that gives new insight into Chris's past. The accompanying audio is from Chris's "Station [[KCWC]]" mix tapes and his Christian and the Hedgehog Boys album.

===[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]]===
Filmed 24 February [[2007]]. In celebration of his milestone 25th birthday, Chris delivers an address summarizing the lessons he has learned in his life and how they should be applied by future generations of "ladies and gentlemen and dudes of all teenages."

==Great Director's Cut==
As a way to save face after the DVD was leaked onto the Internet, Chris claimed<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate September 29th, 2009]]</ref> that the trolls didn't have the "Director's Cut", which includes footage of Chris's [[Christmas]] from [[2004]] and takes from the [[Pixelated PS3]] commercial.

Some argue that Chris might be bluffing, but even if the content does exist, it seems likely that it was an afterthought made after Chris got trolled so that only he would own the TRUE and HONEST copy. And even if trolls were able to obtain the Director's Cut, Chris could pull a George Lucas and say he has a Special Edition DVD. And if that gets stolen, he'll pull a Disney and say he has a "Diamond Edition" DVD.

He later told [[Regina]] that he has a "Master Copy" with over ''six hours'' of tedious crap.<ref>[[Regina e-mails]]</ref>

==Possible Sequel==
In an email to [[Cole]], Chris expresses his intention to create a new DVD "around (his) 50th or sooner"<ref>[[Cole Smithey E-mails]]</ref>.

==Images from the Physical DVD==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:062-CWCsDVD.jpg|Cover.
Image:DVDReleaseCut.jpg|The cover of the release edition.
Image:063-2-CWCDVDWholeMaster.jpg|And the Director's Cut Edition.
Image:063-1-CWCsDVD Label.jpg|Even DVD labels cannot be spared from the horror.
Image:ChrisDVDCD2.jpg|We asked for a "disc image". The torrent went up later, but this was delivered as a cop-out.
Image:CHRISDVD.jpg|Parental Advisory - VERY HONEST content.
Image:ChrisDVD3.jpg|Chapter menu, complete with Magnavox DVD/VCR styling.
Image:CHRISletter.jpg|Letter to troll who received DVD.
Image:Chrislist1.jpg|''Chandler's List'' - It's like ''Schindler's List'', except you'd want to be sent to a gas chamber.
Image:Chrislist2.jpg|'''Spoiler:''' Most of these people went to school with Chris and probably have no idea who he is.
Image:Chrislist3.jpg|And here's the last page.
Image:Chrispaper1.jpg|"Now I'm even more perverted, sexist, and homophobic."
Image:Chrispaper2.jpg|People who Chris couldn't find pictures of to include - consider yourselves lucky.
</gallery>
</center>

==Sources==
<references/>

==External links==
* [http://www.mediafire.com/?injjxctj5wi Torrent (with working trackers)]
* [http://www.youtube.com/view_play_list?p=6581777D1899DCB6 Entire DVD on YouTube.]
* [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/dvd/ Contents of DVD slideshow.]
* [http://www.megaupload.com/?d=EL8AHJ8P Slideshow download.]

{{CWC on TV}}
{{Relics of Fail}}

[[Category:Relics of Fail]]
[[Category:Arts and Crafts]]

Rocky Shoemaker

2011-12-12T14:30:42Z

Baxter:

{{quote|Rocky offers me advice for most general things for counsoling [sic]. I can't say all of the things she has helped me with off of the top of my head, aside from the recent thinking of myself as [[retarded]]|Chris explains how Rocky helps him<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 22]]</ref>}}

{{Quote|She's a troll herself. If she was really trying to help Chris, she could help Barb and Bob as well. But she didn't. Her priority has always been to pursue trolls in lieu of helping Chris. She had this motivation from day one. "I'm trolling you back" pretty much sums up Rocky.|[[Ivy]]'s view<ref>[[Ivy Q&A]]</ref>}}

[[File:Rockypicture.JPG|thumb|Rocky Shoemaker]]

'''Rochelle "Rocky" Shoemaker''' is a pastoral counselor (actual title - "Assistant Pastor for Care Ministries") at the [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church]], who advised [[Chris]] on several matters, going as far back as the [[Miyamoto Saga]].

==Biography==
In the year of Our Lord [[2009]], she brought about the end of the [[Ivy]] Saga, by pushing Chris to go to the police about Ivy. This wasn't the first time she wanted to call the cops, either - [[Julie]] and [[PandaHalo]] have both incurred her wrath in the past.

The last straw came in the form of [[Joshua Martinez]], aka [[Vanessa Hudgens]], who tried to swindle some money out of Chris by trading him a [[PSP]]. After that, Shoemaker made [[Bob Chandler]] and [[Barb]] contact the cops. The agreement was that the cops would only be involved in the Joshua matters, as they were dealing with the trolls on their own terms. However, Rocky blindsided Bob and Barb and brought up Ivy and the trolls with the cops. She even had them try to find Ivy and even managed to get a background check on her and came up with nothing. <ref>[[Ivy Q&A#The_end]]</ref>

In a [[IRC (23 July 2009)|July 2009 IRC Chat]] Chris, believing that he had entered the chat incognito (although the trolls had in fact instantly seen through his false identity), suggested that the trolls force him to [[Chris and sex|rape]] Rocky. Rocky herself is aware that Chris said this. The fact that she did not kick him out of the church on the spot speaks volumes about her sanity.


==The ultimate white knight?==
Rocky Shoemaker might be the only person in the world who is genuinely concerned about Christian's well-being. Judging by her approval of the [[Love Quest]], it can be inferred that she supports Christian's desire for [[china]].

Despite saving him from the wiles of Joshua Martinez and [[Clyde Cash]], it seems as though Rocky is ineffective at making an impact in Christian's life where it really matters - namely his [[Homos|bigotry]], [[Chris and his Ego|selfishness]], [[Chris and death|total disregard for others]], [[Chris and health|gluttony]], and [[Chris and anger|rage]].

One can usually spot her hand in affairs if Chris begins to display common sense. It is generally believed that she was behind Chris's attempt to quit the internet forever on 21 March 2010, as the video was made on a Sunday. Chris likely meets with her on Thursdays and Sundays, as he suddenly developed basic pattern recognition skills long enough to catch one troll on 29 April and smoke out [[Sydney Contacts|another]] on 1 May (though he may have simply gotten both mixed up with [[Jackie]]).

Chris insists that Rocky is a better counselor than a professional psychologist, and seems to uncritically accept whatever she says.

==Interaction with trolls==

In a monumental display of ill-judgment, Rocky provided a great deal of information about Chris's home life to a troll posing as a court-appointed psychiatrist during [[Rocky Shoemaker call|a phone call]] in the run-up to his scheduled [[28 October 2011|court appearance]] in [[December 2011]]. During this call it was revealed that [[Bob]] had been quarantined for bug bites shortly before his death, and that [[14 Branchland Court]] is so badly infected that Chris is forced to stay in [[Chris's Room|his room]] to avoid being bitten himself.

==See also==
*[[Chris and religion]]
*[[Chris and sex]]

== Sources ==
<references/>

{{People}}
{{DEFAULTSORT:Shoemaker, Rocky}}
[[Category:People]]

2011

2011-12-08T17:31:08Z

Baxter:

[[File:TG11.jpg|250px|thumb|[[Chris]] in 2011.]]
[[Image:S2011.JPG|thumb|250px|Graph showing the Google-popularity of the terms ''Sonichu'' (blue) and ''Christian Weston Chandler'' (red). '''2011''' is marked in [[Yellow Is a Mellow Color|Mellow Yellow]].]]

'''2011''' is the third year of organized [[trolling]] of the [[Internet]]'s favorite LOLcow, [[Christian Weston Chandler]]. In 2011, Chris turned 29. The year started out in the shadow of Chris's sixth declaration of leaving the [[Internet]]. In spite of this, Chris has been taking refuge on the [[PlayStation Network]], which has allowed the occasional bit of new material to surface. Most importantly, 2011 brought the revelation that [[Tomgirl pictures|Chris really does enjoy wearing women's clothing.]]

Sadly, [[Bob]] [[Chris and Death|died]] in early September. To add more drama in [[Sagas|Great Saga]] of Chris-Chan, next month, all two remaining Chandlers' were [[Chris and the law|arrested]] [[28 October 2011|for multiple offences, including tresspassing, assault and failure to stop]] at [[the GAMe PLACe]]. Chris and [[Barb]] were bailed out two days later. Barbara appeared in court on the 31st of October, Chris on the 7th of November.

==January==
{{main|January 2011}}

Not much happened this month. Just as it was expected of him, Chris bought ''[[LittleBigPlanet]] 2'', and spent most of the last half of the month playing it. On a more interesting note, Chris's [[Disguises|pseudonym]] [[JenkinsJinkies]] was outed, and his exploits on the [[Trollin Train]] forums from July-August 2010 were made public.

==February==
{{main|February 2011}}

This month saw the release of several of Chris's ''LittleBigPlanet 2'' levels, including [[CWC's Collector's Case Tutorial]] and the [[Autism Tutorial]]s.

==March==
{{main|March 2011}}

An old pile of [[phone calls]] way back from the [[Liquid]]/[[Kacey]] saga was released to the Internet at the beginning of the month.

==April==
[[File:TG20.jpg|thumb|Chris in April 2011]]
{{main|April 2011}}

As the [[Playstation Network]] suffered a long downtime and security breach, Chris's account is hacked again, [[Tomgirl Pictures|revealing pictures]] of Chris showing off his "[[Homos|Tomgirl]]" side. Much controversy has surrounded these photos, as many think that Chris has finally let out his [[True and honest|true sexuality]], while others believe this is a bizarre attempt to appear attractive to [[Tiffany Gowen|"Tomboys"]] using the logic that "Tomgirl + Tomboy = [[China]]".

==May==
{{main|May 2011}}

The PSN came back online, and Chris immediately deleted the "I am Tomgirl." quote. However, he later joined the [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia]] forum, where all TRUE and HONEST Tomgirls and Tomboys hang out.

==June==
{{main|June 2011}}

Chris changed his [[PSN]] quote to "I No Socialize Online", published [[3DS Flipnote|a Flipnote]] and changed his [[voicemail message]] a few times. He also continued posting on the [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia]] forum, revealing some of the most disturbing stuff to date.

==July==
[[File:CWCJuly2011.jpg|thumb|left|Chris in July 2011]]
{{main|July 2011}}

After months of minimal activity, Chris's internet presence increased markedly during July. His participation in the [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia]] forum was discovered, after which Chris publicly announced his true identity to the other members. Chris also created a new [[Facebook]] account, contradicting his prior claim regarding online socialization, and logged back into his long-dormant [[YouTube]] account. Meanwhile, [[Liquid Chris]]'s YouTube account was shut-down for good.

==August==
[[File:CWC0811.PNG|thumb|Chris in August 2011]]
{{main|August 2011}}

August began with Chris and his [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia|tom-pals]] planning vengeance against the CWCki. Soon thereafter, Chris broke his lengthy [[Chris and the Internet#Attempts to leave the Internet|internet hiatus]] by returning to YouTube and uploading [[Calling Out|a series of videos]] throughout [[August_2011|August]] in which he claims to have information on the true identities of a number of trolls, including [[Surfshack Tito (troll)|Surfshack Tito]] and [[Jack Thaddeus]]. These videos called for each troll to first upload a video of their own apologizing for their crimes against Chris, and then leave the internet forever. An earthquake and major hurricane hit Virginia during this month, but unfortunately, this did not stop Chris from uploading videos.

==September==
{{main|September 2011}}

September began with Chris on a high, having unmasked [[Jack Thaddeus]], [[Alec Benson Leary]] and [[Thorg]], and forcing [[Surfshack Tito]] to leave the Internet. Sadly, on 6 September, Chris's father [[Bob]] died, and his funeral took place on 11 September. After that, nothing was heard from Chris.

==October==
{{main|October 2011}}

On 18 October, Chris tried to sell his old TV (presumably Bob's) on [[Craigslist]] for [[Chris and reality|more than 250$]], which could indicate that finances of house of Chandler, after death of its patriarch, are in worse state as they were before. [[28 October 2011|An incident]] occurred at the GAMe PLACe on 28 October, and both Chris and Barbara were arrested, though they have since been bailed out.

==November==
{{main|November 2011}}

Chris uploaded pics of Snyder onto the [[CWCki]], and appeared in court to be charged with trespass, misdemeanor assault and failure to stop at the scene of an incident.

==December==
{{main|December 2011}}

Chris and Barb are due to be tried on 15 December 2011. It will be a blue [[Christmas|C-Mas]] at [[14 Branchland Court]] indeed. However, he's ''still'' not going to get a [[All I Want For Christmas Is A Pretty Girlfriend|pretty girlfriend]] for Christmas.

{{Timeline}}
[[Category:Chronology]]

File talk:TG1.png

2011-12-05T00:37:08Z

Baxter: Created page with "What the hell is this image? ~~~~"

What the hell is this image? [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 16:37, 4 December 2011 (PST)

Michael Snyder

2011-11-27T10:35:20Z

Baxter: Goddamn it, learn to fucking count

{{Quality}}
{{quote|I hope that God will forgive you for being so heartless and cruel, Michael Snyder! '''JEW!'''|[[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|Chris apologizing to Michael.]]}}
{{quote|He probably will.|Michael Snyder to the above.}}
{| class="infobox" style="width: 21em; font-size: 90%;"
|-
! colspan="2" | Manajerk
|-
| colspan="2" | [[File:HNI 0022.JPG|300px]]
|-
! colspan="2" |Michael Snyder
|-
| '''Nickname'''
| Mike
|-
| '''Birth'''
| Mid-1956 (age 55)
|-
| '''Gender'''
| Male
|-
| '''Nationality'''
| [[United States of America|American]]
|-
| '''Race'''
| [[Chris and race|White]]
|-
| '''Family'''
| Wife and daughter
|-
| '''Occupation'''
| [[Manager|Owner]] of [[the GAMe PLACe]]
|-
|}

[[File:AskMichaelSnyder.jpg|thumb||Chris at war with Michael.]]

'''Michael "Mike" Snyder''' (born mid-1956<ref>[http://www.youtube.com/user/TheRcholic YouTube account]</ref>; Hebrew מִיכָאֵל שניידר) is the [[manajerk|owner]] of [[The GAMe PLACe]], a [[video games|game]] and [[Toys|hobby]] store in [[Charlottesville]]. Chris regularly caused trouble at the PLACe and was eventually permabanned in June [[2008]]. Based on his surname, Chris came to the conclusion that Snyder was Jewish, giving him [[Niggos|yet]] [[Chris and race|another]] [[Homos|minority]] to rage at.

Due to his [[Naive|misguided]] belief that he had genuine friends at the PLACe, Chris developed a burning hatred for Snyder over the years, describing him as a "bastard",<ref>[[Vanessa AIM Chat 3]]</ref> a "[[JERKS|jerk]]"<ref>[[Keep CWC's Wikipedia Up]]</ref>, a "pigheaded, stubborn Jew"<ref>[[Katie Bay E-mails 2]]</ref>, "cold-hearted"<ref>[[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean]]</ref> and even a [[pedofork| child molester]].<ref>[[Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher]]</ref> In June 2010, Chris had a [[Son-Chu|run-in]] with Snyder when he tried to take his picture at the PLACe, and on [[28 October 2011]] both Barb and Chris got legal charges for a more serious attack.
==At the GAMe PLACe==
{{quote|That was why the Son of a Bitch Jew kicked me out of The Game Place, Permanently, After YEARS of Loyal Volunteer Service in the Pokemon TCG League. I had apologized numerously before, but he's still the pigheaded, stubborn Jew he was then.|[[Katie Bay E-mails 2|Chris being his usual humble self.]]}}

Chris's behavior offended the store's management in a number of ways. Aside from punting his gym leader duties, scaring the small children he played card games with, picking fights with other players, and generally being a racist, homophobic creep. He would truck his video game consoles into The GAMe PLACe and take over the shop's flat-screen TV for considerable amounts of time, loudly sing along to [[Britney Spears]] during games, pitch fits inspired by his hatred of the [[HEXBox]] in public, and so on.<ref>[[Mimms and Lucas Q&A]]</ref>

The trigger for his permanent ban in [[August 2008]] was a shouting match with a young [[niggos|black kid]]. That particular incident was merely the straw that broke the camel's back, though "Mike was looking for any reason to ban him at this point," says Mimms.<ref name=mimms1/>

Predictably, Chris did his best to resist getting kicked out of the store. He brought his parents in to argue his case with Michael Snyder, to which Michael responded by calling the [[police]]. Despite a fierce response from [[Barbara Chandler]], Chris and his family failed to move either Michael or the cops, and every indication is that Chris will never be allowed back into the store.<ref name=mimms1/>

In the [[Jackie e-mails]], Chris offers his own chronology and version of events. There, he claims that he was thrown out of the store much earlier than Mimms indicates, in June 2008. The so-called "Wii Incident", according to Chris, was when Michael Snyder forced Chris to stop bogarting the TV for his Wii. Doing this apparently caused a number of children to miss out on obtaining a few trade-only evolution Pokémon. Chris got angry and wrote a letter, sign, or simply scrawled a note on the side of a card box stating "Michael Snyder Loves the "F" out of [[Mary Lee Walsh]]." This, Chris claimed, was Michael's last straw and he booted him then.

According to the [[CWCipedia]] article for [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Megan_Schroeder Megan Schroeder], Chris claims that Megan was there the day he was banned and claimed that she just stood there in shock, refusing to speak up for him. In reality, of course, she was simply disgusted by his behavior like any rational person would have been and relieved that his being kicked out of the store would be the last time Chris would ever be in her sight.<ref>http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Megan_Schroeder</ref> Also, she refused to defend Chris not because of shock, but because of his sexual harassment, [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|destruction of her dignity]], anger issues, and overall immaturity, ultimately cementing the fact that nobody wants Chris to ever return to the store.

Chris is vague about why he thinks he was banned; he has said that ''"Michael was scared of me and and uh, he was afrai- and he was uh, preoccupied with his crackpot theory of me scaring his- scaring his... customers away, so he banned me from the store."''<ref>[[Sydney Kirsch]]</ref>

==Years of hatred (2008-11)==
{{Quote|And I also hope that the Game and Hobby Place in Charlottesville... BURNS TO THE GROUND! ALONG WITH MICHAEL SNYDER!|Chris|[[Autism Tutorial Part 3]]}}

On 12 April 2010, [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|Chris confronted Michael]] in an attempt to get back into The GAMe PLACe. In his anger, Chris ends up [[South Park|calling him a Jew]] as an insult.

Based on comments from earlier in the audio recording, Chris seems to have jumped to his conclusion about Michael's religion on account of his last name. In fact, "Schneider" is a German surname meaning "tailor" (and "Snyder" descends from the Dutch word for "cutter"). While some German Jews might have wound up with the name by anglicizing the Jewish surname "Sznajder", it doesn't necessarily denote Jewish heritage at all. Michael himself is a goy.

In a [[100 2178|more recent video]], Chris linked Michael to a conspiracy he believes the [[Greene County]] school board have staged against him to keep him down, and calls Michael "GOD-DAMN, GREEDY ... SNYDER", seeming to restrain himself from calling Snyder a "greedy Jew".

Chris's violent urges against Snyder periodically came to the surface, whether it was telling [[Lars]] that he would shoot Michael if he had a gun<ref>[[Lars Call]]</ref> or wishing that the PLACe would burn down with Mike inside.<ref>[[Autism Tutorial Part 3]]</ref>

On [[6 June 2010]], Chris drove to the PLACe and Mike appeared on YouTube and commented ''"Christian is in my parking lot right now being grilled by the police. He [[Pedofork|took pictures of my daughter]] and tried to run me over with [[Son-Chu|his car]]. they witness this, and I bet they still do nothing about it."'' Chris claimed that he wanted to take a photograph of Snyder to use as a dartboard, but when Snyder saw him with his camera outside, he chased Chris. Chris claimed that he tried to drive away, but was accosted by Snyder, a woman he didn't recognize, and the police.<ref>[[6 June 2010]]</ref> Chris didn't tell his parents about this incident.<ref>[[Matthew Noble call]]</ref>

Snyder did not engage with trolls until [[2010]], when he made several [[YouTube]] comments, most notably : ''"When I go to [[CWCville|hell]], I will hold the door open for you, if not not too busy giving tours. I can't believe I've spent all these years conspiring to make your life more miserable than your fossilized parents could ever dream of. Oh, wait, I wasn't doing that, I've been too busy living my own life. I remember you as a child creeping out all the other [[pokemon]] kids, including my own, because even [[2000|10 years ago]] you were an angry, unsportsmanlike punk. Signed, That goddam Michael Snyder."''<ref>[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LRJlreNexFU&lc=H4DNT6hErMgcsSRClm-pu6iLL_1ZaF0ObFCT7h6BT-k YouTube comment]</ref>

[[Matthew Noble call|A phonecall]] on 10 August 2010 indicated that Bob (and, presumably, Barb as well) shares Chris's idea of the GAMe PLACe as Troll Central: ''"Mike's been [[Kick the Autistic|persecuting him]] for years and I don't like Mike. I'd like to speak to the owner of the place I think lives up here, up the road from me. In Madison or somewhere. This whole thing is a setup from the very beginning with my son. Now I don- didn't like it then and I still don't like it. ''[...]'' Mike, and [[Megan]] are the ones that conspired together with a couple of other people- kids there that I think were [[Homos|gay]], to persecute and torment Christian for years.''

==Shit gets real (2011-)==
{{main|28 October 2011}}
On [[28 October 2011]], just a few weeks after Bob's death, Chris and [[Barb]] launched a vehicular assault on the newly christened "Cville's Hobbies, Games, and Toys", now owned by Snyder. Chris faces charges of trespass, misdemeanor assault and failure to stop at the scene of an accident; Barb is up for assaulting a [[jerkop]] and failure to stop at the scene of an accident. Mike has also filed a civil suit against them both.

==See also==
*[[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean]]
*[[6 June 2010]]
*[[28 October 2011]]
*[[The GAMe PLACe]]

==References==
<references/>

==External links==
*[http://www.youtube.com/user/TheRcholic YouTube Account]

{{People}}
{{DEFAULTSORT:Snyder, Michael}}
[[Category:People]]
[[Category:Manajerks]]

Lars' Ship has Sunk.MOV

2011-11-01T00:38:47Z

Baxter:

[[File:Hmmodel.jpg|thumb|left|What the video is about]]
[[File:TheTitanicTruth.jpg|thumb|Lars' ship sunk by the [[Monthly tugboat|tugboat]]]]

'''Lars' Ship has Sunk.MOV''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 25 [[September 2010]]. Chris addresses the video to [[Lars]], an ex-boyfriend of Chris's latest [[sweetheart]], [[Jackie]], who had been spreading a [[Nudes|nude photo of her]] around the Internet. Jackie want Chris to "scare the crap out of Lars" so that he wouldn't trouble her again.<ref>[[Jackie Chat 2]]</ref> Chris proceeds to [[Twin Falling Towers|belittle and disrespect]] the victims of the [[wikipedia:RMS Titanic|''Titanic'']] disaster by pretending to sink a [[LEGO]] boat, apparently with Lars aboard. The grand finale is Chris destroying the boat and some LEGO characters with his feet.

[[Barb]] makes a rare appearance at the end; Chris later told Jackie that she was clearing out stink bugs from their filthy home.<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 16]]</ref>

Of note in this video is further signs of Chris's [[Chris and health|rapid aging.]] His [[hair]]line is further back than it ever has been, though it appears Chris may have resorted to growing his hair out to hide his premature balding. However, the way it looks makes him look creepier than ever before.

{{clear}}

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = Lars' Ship has Sunk
| video = {{#ev:youtube|fnDx2XjnYsg}}
| stardate = 25 [[September 2010]]
| subject = {{Galpals|text}}, {{Violence|text}}, {{Power|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}, {{Smug|text}}
| shirt = {{BrickFestShirt|text}}
| previous = [[Song for Jackie.MOV]]
| next = [[Anti Troll Movement Video1]]
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}
}}

{{quote|The consequences will never be the same|Chris on breaking LEGO}}

=== Transcript ===

[[File:Creepy boat.jpg|thumb|Chris WILL sink your boat!]]
[[File:Brickfest-back.jpg|thumb|These guys had no idea what was coming]]

Good afternoon. This message goes out to an ex of mine, dear belove- my dear beloved sweetheart's, who goes by the name of Lars. Who had a session [[Chris and English|[means to say "an obsession"]]], with model boats! [''Presents Lego boat''] And here is a Titanic-like boat! He is piloting it! Let's see what happens to his boat!

[''Moves "boat" down to an inverted Lego board'']

[''High pitched voice''] "Oh, look at me! I'm sailing in my Titanic-like boat which was originally for my girlfriend! Who is now Christian's girlfriend! And today was our anniversary! This twenty fifth of September - Oh no! What this! A ciberg!"

[''Wails and breaks boat apart'']

It gets better. You know what. Because... Here comes the demolition team that finds... th-the remains... of the sunken ship. [''Steps on the "ship"''] Boom! Boom! [''Cackles''] Oh, and here's the captain of the ship! The remains of him anyway! Peoww! [''Crushes figurine underfoot, collapsing a small pile of hoarded books and copybooks by accident, then zooms in''] [[Clyde is Weaker than Water|Weak as dirt]].

[''Points upwards''] [http://encyclopediadramatica.ch/Jessi_Slaughter The consequences will never be the same.] Lars, [[I AM STRONG|you are no match for me and my]] [[obesity|muscles]]. [''[[Barb]] says "Hello"'']

[''Licks his lips as if about to speak again - video ends'']

==See also==
*[[New Address]]
*[[Twin Falling Towers]], in which Chris mocked another tragedy
==References==
<references/>
{{clear}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Song for Jackie.MOV]]|nextlink=[[Anti Troll Movement Video1]]}}
{{Sweetheart Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, September 2010| 2010-09-25]]
[[Category:Jackie Saga videos| 2010-09-25]]

Ian Brandon Anderson

2011-10-22T17:49:06Z

Baxter:

[[Image:JAELou2.jpg|thumb|IBA Chandler sniper rifle.]]

'''Ian Brandon Anderson''' was a name given to [[Chris]] in late [[2009]] as part of an in-joke with regards to the [[Liquid Chris]] saga. When Liquid first showed up, his gimmick was that he was supposedly the "real" Christian Weston Chandler, and that the CChanSonichu account on [[Youtube]] had been hacked by an impostor a short while ago, and it was the impostor who was now operating the IBAChandler account and pretending to be the real Chris. In this narrative, Ian Brandon Anderson was supposedly the real name of the impostor.

==The name==
The name originated from the first three initials in Chris's new Youtube screen name. As Chris later explained, the real meaning of IBAChandler was really that it was a magnificently retarded wordplay joke, meaning "I Be A Chandler", as in "I, Christian, am one of the Chandlers". However, when Chris later uploaded [[Rollin' and Trollin']], he gave the real [[trolls]] ammunition to use against him, as they were able to support Liquid's claims of being the [[TRUE and HONEST]] Chris-Chan, whilst claiming that the actual Chris was really a troll, and using the video as proof of their claims. During this, one of the many Youtube trolls involved came up with the idea that IBA was actually an acronym for the impostor's real name, deciding that it meant Ian Brandon Anderson. Liquid himself later picked up on this and began accusing Chris of being Ian as well, leading directly into the rest of the Liquid Saga, such as the [[Singstar Challenge]] and the conflict over [[Kacey]].

==Chris's reaction==
Of course, suggesting that Chris was anything other than the true and honest Christian Weston Chandler was a serious insult to him. Every instance of Liquid calling him Ian in [[Kacey and Liquid Call|phone calls]] or in a video would cause Chris to rage and scream about how he was the real Christian, resulting in such humorous videos as [[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!]] in which he screamed the infamous words "MY NAME IS NOT IAN...BRANNAN...SOMETHING!!!".

When Chris later included Liquid as a character in the [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'' comic]], his character's name was [[IBAChandler]], just like the Youtube screen name.<ref>http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_9/Page_79</ref>

Though Chris did [[tard rage]] over being called Ian several times during the Liquid saga, it should be noted that he only ever reacted to Liquid calling him as such. In spite of what they may think, [http://www.youtube.com/user/ThePCassassins faggots] commenting on Chris's Youtube channel and calling his [[14 Branchland Court|house]] to [[Prank calls|scream into his phone]] did nothing to Chris, because Chris never gave a shit about them either way.

==Fan Videos==

<center>{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Denial: The Ian Brandon Anderson Story (trailer)
| video = {{#ev:youtube|iS42GGu2f2o}}
| Stardate = 29 [[November 2009]]
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/GodAndTheBearFilms GodAndTheBearFilms]
| Subject = Ian Brandon Anderson
| Video Type = Mock-Trailer
}}</center>

==References==
<references/>

==See also==
*[[Liquid Chris]] - The first person to call Chris Ian to his face
*[[Asperchu]] - Which used Ian jokes on occasion
*[[Singstar Challenge]] - In which Liquid called Chris Ian several times
*[[Rollin' and Trollin']] - The catalyst for the original Ian meme

{{The Cwcivil War of 2009}}

[[Category:Liquid Saga]]
[[Category:Chris's alter egos]]

JK Productions

2011-09-05T13:03:37Z

Baxter: /* History */ Removing material which was three years out of date.

[[Image:JKReginald.png|thumb|200px|Reginald the anteel, in all his bizarre glory.]]

In August of [[2008]], [[Chris]] excitedly endorsed a new blog that was supposedly the official journal of '''JK Productions''', a company claiming to be developing ''[[Sonichu]]: The Game''. Juxtaposing 'screenshots' of absurdly basic in-game features with artwork that was far superior to the [[Sonichu (comic)|source material]] and annotated by a hyper commentary, the blog was nonetheless shrewd enough to convince some (not least Chris) of its authenticity.

That was until September, when, on the basis of an alleged cease-and-desist order from [[Nintendo]] and Sega, [[pickle]]-happy pictures of character redesigns were premiered. Sonichu was replaced by 'Reginald' (also the name of Chris's [[Reginald Chandler|imaginary son]]), an upper class anteater/eel hybrid. Rosechu was similarly replaced by an 'anteel' - specifically, a Village People inspired, boner-sporting anteel. Finally, Chris-Chan himself was replaced by a sassy, female reimagining which he no doubt [[mass debating|fapped over]].

Shortly thereafter, JK Productions claimed to have broken ties with Chris altogether, in disgusted protest at the [[Sonichu 8|Spring Break Issue]];

[[Image:ChrissyChan.png|thumb|left|130px|]]

{{quote|He certainly has a point that we should encourage women's rights...to bear arms! It is advisable to keep this man a great distance from the nearest vagina.Do not be so down, for there is some good news too. You see, JKProductions has acquired the trademark for Sonichu, making him our official property! Christian Weston Chandler's "Sonichu" comics, should henceforth be recognized as an, *ahem*, poorly done fan-comic (laughs.)|JK Productions, being lulzy.}}

Chris was left to sheepishly admit to being trolled and return to harassing Nintendo executives.

==History==
[[Image:JKRosechu.png|thumb|left|150px|UFOOOOO~!!! IT'S HARDOGAAAAY~!!!]]

On [[2008#August|17 August 2008]], Chris updated his website that was previously dead for a year with a new entry echoing the demands of his latest video, in which he calls for all the Sonichu fans to storm Nintendo and Sega with requests that his character be given official merchandise. He also promises the finale to this season of Sonichu within 6 months, and a new series starting next year.

Normally this may seem a trivial update in the adventures of CWC. However, with this post he released a new blog dedicated to Sonichu: The Game (at http://sonichugame.blogspot.com, now deleted and not archived) made up of mostly "fan art", with a few of his own pictures accompanying updates to the game's progression.

[[Image:Jk controller.png|thumb|"Chris Spent over 9,000 hours in ms paint to provide us this diagram of a ps3 controller."{{cite}} ... "image courtesy of Christian Weston Chandler. Behold! The home entertainment controller, perfected."]]

On [[2008#September|5 September 2008]], '''the official Sonichu game blog''' revealed what many people had suspected: that it was the work of an elaborate troll. In a post claiming that SEGA and Nintendo had slapped 'production' with a cease and desist order, the resident blogger offered his redesigns of [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]]; an [[Reginald|upper class]] and a Hardgay impersonating anteater/eel hybrid respectively. That Chris would condone such radical alterations of his 100% totally original characters is enough to raise eyebrows, but a more-than-fleeting inspection of 'Reginald' - Sonichu's reimagining - shows that he is armed with that appendage Chris dreads most, i.e. a [[pickle]]. Oh, and Rosechu's equivalent has a beard and a boner, I suppose that's worth mentioning as well. A follow-up post was submitted on 6 September 2008, featuring a redesign of the big CWC himself. Chris is convinced that JKProductions was not a troll and continued to endorse their blog as the 'Official CWC Approved Sonichu Video Game Blog' on both his website and [[YouTube]] account until the demise of the former. He has never had the faintest idea as to what [http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=jk "JK" stood for.]

== Game art ==

<gallery>
Image:Hurrr1 color.jpg|"Here are some masterful drawings by our very own Artist and CSIII practitioner: Mike Sandy" ... "Sonichu, having beaten the snot out of a Jerkop, strikes a cool pose.."
Image:Japchu.jpg|"The conceptual profile of Sonichu. These are subject to alterations."
Image:Hurrr2 color.jpg|"Sonichu in the act of kicking a jerkop square in the face! Ouch."
Image:Hurrr4 color.jpg|"Sonichu is just too extreme for this angry jerkop."
Image:Hurrr3 color2.jpg|"Could this be? Sonichu is really zapping to the extreme!"
Image:Jerkhieg.png|"Of course, the Sonichu game will feature bosses of many shapes and sizes. Allow me to introduce you to one of them." ... "This is the [[Jerkhief|jerkop]], he is quite large, no? He dislikes virgins, as well as Sonichu. He will attack them both on sight."
Image:Sonichugameee.png|"Ah, very large indeed. He is very lazy too! Instead of fighting, he sends his [[jerkop]] minions to do his dirty work."
Image:Jerkops.png|"Look out! The poor jerkhief is much to large to move on his own! Should you wear him down..."
Image:Ohgod.png|"Oh my... H-he really knows how to get around!"
Image:Title screen.png|"Most games for the PC feature title screens, and sonichu is no exception to this..."
</gallery>

[[Category:Not TRUE and ORIGINAL]]
[[Category:Trolls]]

Chris Sings Fart Song for Flora

2011-08-09T03:25:04Z

Baxter: /* Transcript */

'''Chris Sings Fart Song for Flora''' is a 23 [[March 2009]] video in which [[Chris]] explains that it is healthy to fart and sings the Fart Song from ''[[Family Guy]]'' for [[Ivy]]'s friend [[Flora]], who has a fear of farting.

==Watch==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Chris Sings Fart Song for Flora
| image = {{#ev:youtube|KmKrHyyenjU}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 29 March 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Music.png]] [[Music]]
| Saga = [[Image:Ivy_saga.png]] [[Ivy]] Saga
| Shirt = [[Image:Dangerstripeshirt.PNG]] DangerStripe
| previous = [[Chris Sings Lovin' You#Watch|Chris Sings Lovin' You]]
| next = [[Take that Page DOWN NOW!#Video|Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]
}}</center>

{{quote|[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|It's not dangerous at all to let farts out.]]}}

===Transcript===

Hello. I'm making this video to Ivy's friend Flora, who uhh... has some concerns of her own about uhh... natural bodily function... that hopefully after this video she'll feel better about it. But uhh... there are... dangers about holding in farts... but, it's better and... and it's better to let them, it's better to let farts OUT, and it's not very comft... and it's not... dangerous at all to let farts out. If anything, holding farts in err... there's a chance of uhh... getting hemorrhoids, or uhh... some ki- or possibly doubles the risk of colon cancer. Err there's rumors that's going around on the Internet.

But anyway uhh... [''reads from notes''] but yeah, basically farts are uhh gas in our intestines that comes out from several sources. You know, the air you swallow, gas seeping into our intestines from our blood, gas produced by chemical reactions in our gut, and gas produced by bacteria living in our gut. Hm. And I get these facts I have printed here from uhh... [http://www.heptune.com/farts.html heptune.com], H-E-P-T-U-N...E. Forgot the E. [''in strange voice''] Remember the E. Anyway uhh... On average a person produces about half a liter of fart-gas per day, which amounts to fourteen daily farts. So it's no problem to let your farts out! Whereas may be difficult to... [''mumbles to self, cutting off the rest of the line he was reading''] Okay. Yeah, well... But you know uhh... a good reason why the fart, why our farts come out come out our uhh... butt... because that's where our HOLE is, down there, for the farts to come out of. And if you don't let the farts out it's like uhh... holding in... it's like uhh... zit. If you... if pressure isn't relieved from the zit then uhh... it just might not heal. Or it'll, uh, just get bigger and bigger and bigger. So... yeah. Mm.

Besides which, you know, farting is a sign that uhh... you are alive. I mean, second most, second most important sign to let you know- to remind you that you're alive aside from breathing. You breathe you're alive, you fart you're alive. All animals fart. Hmm.

Then also, uhh... you know the uhh... it's also a possible question of men farting more than women. Well, that's not true. They, women, fart just as much. It's just that uhh... apparently men take more pride in it than most women... MOST men take pride in it... yeah. [''Reads from paper and chuckles''] Ah, here's a fun quote. Listen to this: "I have read that men fart more often than women. If that's true then women must be saving up and expelling more gas per fart than men do." Hmm.

But anyway uhh harmful to hold in farts: there are differences in opinion on that issue. Certainly people have believed for several centuries that uhh retaining the fart is bad for the health. Again, heptune.com. I wanna make sure I quote them:

<blockquote>Even Emperor Claydius [Claudius] passed a law legalizing farting at banquets out of concern for people's health. There was a widespread belief a person could be poisoned or catch disease by retaining farts, but doctors clarified that there is no particular harm. Uhh. It will not poison you. They are natural component in your intestinal contents. Worst thing that can happen is mild stomachache from the gas pressure. But one doctor suggested that pathological distensation [distention] of the bowel could result... if a person holds it in too much. And even the effort involved in retaining the fart can cause hemorrhoids.</blockquote>

And there's uhh rumors going around about it possibly doubling the chances of colon cancer. Hmm.

But uhh, anyway, Flora, it's okay to fart once in a while. If you prefer to keep it private that's fine. You uhh... take it to the bathroom. And err if people remembered, there was a song written about the joys of farting. [''Smiles and bobs head''] On an episode of ''Family Guy''.

[''Starts singing out of key while stroking [[Guitar Hero]] controller'']

I like fancy learning books... I like apple tarts... I like cosy breakfast nooks... I like modern arts... And I like farts! Yes, I like farts! I like to fart your, fart your, fart your farts! Yeah, I like farts! If you got heart, [''puts on an impression of what in his mind Ivy's friend talks like''] "Oh, I've got heart"! [''Mumbles something that's hard to make out which doesn't seem to match the lyrics of the actual song''] "Where do I start?" Well Flora, I will help you get your, Flora started. [''Chris starts to make several disgusting fart sounds with his mouth while continuing to strum his Guitar Hero controller'']

It's OK to fart.

[''Video cuts off and comes back like Chris had forgot something''] Have a good day, Flora.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Chris Sings Lovin' You]]|nextlink=[[Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]|}}
{{Music Videos}}

{{Sweetheart Videos}}

[[Category: Chris-chan videos, March 2009| 2009-03-29]]
[[Category: Ivy Saga videos| 2009-03-29]]

Cherokian Clan

2011-08-05T03:19:43Z

Baxter: adding deleted material

[[Image:Chrisansestore.jpg|thumb|Cherokians have heads bigger than their torsos, arms thicker than their legs, and still manage to wear ill-fitting clothing. Seriously.]]

{{Quote|I will admit, my knowledge of the Cherokees can be better.|Chris, [[Mailbag 8]]}}

[[Chris]] claims to have at least one ancestor who is [[Wikipedia:Cherokee|Cherokee]]. Thus, the '''Cherokian Clan''' is the tribe he believes this ancestor belongs to. The ancient exploits of the clan figure heavily into the mythology of the ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' comics.

The primary rival tribe of the Cherokian Clan was the [[Wasabi Clan]], which Chris stole from ''[[Wikipedia:Naruto|Naruto]]''.

==Fictional history==
Apparently living in what is now [[Virginia]] many centuries ago, the Cherokians (pronounced [tʃəˈɹɑkiən] - chuh-rock-ee-uhns by Chris) possessed considerable mystical powers and skill for prophecy. [[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan|The Cherokee leader]], Christian's ancestor, wore a coveted [[Cherokian crown]] which somewhat resembled the ears of [[Sonichu]], suggesting that there is [[Transformers|more than meets the eye]] to Christian's creation.

The Cherokians and Wasabi fought frequently over both the crown and the [[Queen of the Cherokian Clan|Cherokian queen]], whom the [[Wasabi Rival|Wasabi leader]] wanted as his own. Despite this, the Cherokians and Wasabi joined forces to defeat and imprison their mutual enemy, [[Count Graduon]].

Recognizing that Graduon could someday again threaten mankind, the Cherokians wrote the [[Anchuent Prophecy]], describing the exact circumstances of Graduon's escape and the identity of the individuals who would summon the power to defeat him. The prophecy was locked away in the Destiny Cave somewhere near the future site of [[CWCville]], Virginia, along with the Fireshock Pendant and Lightning Bracelets that would empower two of the three "[[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|electric creatures]]" fated to stop Graduon.

==Seriously?==
Chris is among a very large number of [[America|Americans]] — most of whom aren't autistic man-children — who claim to have some distant [[Wikipedia:Native American|Native American]] heritage. In particular, it is especially common for many white and [[Niggos|black]] people, and especially in the South, to specifically claim Cherokee heritage. How accurate all of those claims are is another matter. At least in some cases, it is more likely that the "Cherokee ancestor" is a cover for having a distant Black ancestor (if the person claiming the ancestry is White) or White ancestry (if the person claiming it is Black).

In Chris's case, it needs to be noted that he also claims to be descended from [[Anne Boleyn]], whose only offspring, as Wikipedia reminds us, died without children. And for someone who takes pride in his Cherokee ancestry, he is remarkably ignorant regarding actual Cherokees, who resemble Chris's Cherokees the way the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki resemble the American Godzilla remake. He depicts the [[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan]] as White and blue-eyed, referring to Cherokee artifacts, customs, and people with the dubious demonym "Cherokian," and ''slathering them in '''solid gold''' ''Sonichu''-themed jewelery and armor.'' You know, like so many Indians were known to wear. Interestingly, the large amounts of gold, the decoration, the color, and the overall design makes the character look far more Mayan than anything else.

When a letter in the [[Mailbag]] asked to explain his inaccuracies regarding the Cherokee people and how he came to presenting them in the comics the way he did, Chris offered that he didn't know as much about the Cherokees as he possibly could. He doesn't admit that he was blindingly, mind numbingly ''wrong'', simply that there might be a few facts he glossed over.<ref>[[Mailbag 8]]</ref>

==The Cherokee Respond to Chris' claims about his heritage==

<center>{{#ev:youtube|fRXroiXFTWs}}</center>

== Gallery ==
<center><gallery>
Image:CherokeeChris.jpg|Artist's depiction of Chris celebrating his Cherokee ancestry.
Image:Indiann.jpg|Somehow, the real Chris doing it looks sillier than the troll art.
Image:160-ChrokiChanCard.jpg|[[My Little Pony]] featured heavily in ancient Native American culture.
</gallery></center>

==See also==
*[[War Paint Video]] - Chris pretends to be a real Cherokee to threaten trolls.
*[[ECV 00001]] - Chris reads the Wikipedia article on the Cherokee Clan for several minutes.
*[[Chris and race#Native Americans|Chris and race]] - More analysis of Chris's racism
*[[Megatron Pistol]] - As used by the ancient Cherokees.

==References==
<references/>

==External links==
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UUQ0O7gPKMA Cherokee Chris-chan]

{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:CWC-isms]]
[[Category:Plot Devices]]

Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown

2011-08-05T02:54:39Z

Baxter: /* Transcript */

{{quote|I [[curse]] those seven people (between the cast of the three illegal videos) to [[death threats|DIE and BURN]]!

As for [[Adam Stackhouse|Adam]], if he is reading this and is asking, "You've got something to say to me?" I do, P.S. F*** You, you [[Dream]] Smashing Son of a B****!|[[PSN Blogs]]}}

[[Image:PaRappaContestInfo.jpg|thumb|Original promo info about the contest]]

In [[June 2007]], [[Sony]] Computer Entertainment [[America]] (SCEA) announced the '''Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown''' contest to promote the video game ''[[PaRappa the Rapper]]''. Contestants were to film themselves performing either Chop Chop Master Onion's rap, Instructor Mooselini's rap or Cheap Cheap the Cooking Chicken's rap a capella. The grand prize winner of the contest would receive two [[PSP]]s and an all-expenses-paid trip to Seattle for the 2007 Penny Arcade Expo.

The contest was of monumental importance, as it would achieve goals for [[Christian Weston Chandler]] on multiple fronts. Beyond his innate desire to win contests by making an ass of himself on film, Chris hoped to bestow one of the PSPs to his beloved [[Megan Schroeder]] and invite her to accompany him on the trip, thereby creating an opportunity for her to [[China|give in]] to her obvious passion for him. The potential benefits could not be understated. Failure to win the contest was not an option.

==Master Onion A-La Mode==
{{Infobox/video
| name = Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown
| image = {{#ev:youtube|cEmM4JKZK8I}}
| Stardate = 29 [[June 2007]]
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = {{Music|text}}, {{Video games|text}}
| Performance Style = {{Comedy|text}}
| Saga = {{Stackhouse|text}}
| Shirt = {{OrangeShirt|text}}
| previous = [[Soul_Calibur#Chris_vs_Mary_Lee_Walsh|SOUL CALIBUR: Chris-chan vs. Mary Lee Walsh]]
| next = [[CWC_is_Angry#Video|CWC is Angry]]
}}

To ensure nothing less than total victory, Chris elected to perform the [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nJ3o3kQZWm8 Chop Chop Master Onion Rap]. Despite claiming this was the only song he knew from the game, Chris clearly didn't know it all that well, considering that he reads its lyrics while "performing," not bothering to rehearse/learn the lines. But then again, have any of his videos looked even remotely prepared? Oddly, he peppers the video with various video effects that seem to come from what is likely the default video editing program of EyeToy/PSEye, including a hilarious caption of "Birthday Boy" popping up during one point. It could be assumed that Chris did so to make his video look 'nice', only for it to turn into laughing material. Towards the end of the video, Chris can be seen [[chris and health|struggling to breathe]] from close to three minutes of extremely mild exercise.

{{quote|This previously submitted PaRapper the Rapper "Master Onion A-La Mode" Video is among the TOP TEN to win the GRAND PRIZE. And I would TRULY APPRECIATE your generous Vote, so please click the highlighted link to the Playstation Website's Voting page. **I am Video NUMBER 7 (scroll down; the one with the Blue Guitar)** You have the power to make my AUTISTIC life SO MUCH BETTER. Thank You. :) (more) }}

===Transcript===

<poem>Hey, P-Station, my name is Christian Chandler
I live in [[Ruckersville, Virginia]]!
I have a PSP, I like to rap,
I play PaRappa, and [[Homo|go with him now.]]
The only song I know is "Master Onion"
Which I got from a demo I borrowed from my friend Megan!

I have a PSP and she don't,
So give me the PSP; unwrap the wrapper,
So I can give one to her, and then we can play together!

So here we go, we're gonna sing it now.
Master Onion, A-La Mode!

[[CWC Fighter|Kick! Punch!]] It's all in the m-mind.
If you wanna test me, I'm sure you will find
That you all things, I'll teach ya sure to beat ya,
Nevertheless, you'll get a lesson from teacher now

Kick (Kick)
Punch (Punch)
Chop (Chop)
Block (Block)

Once more now. Kick (Kick)
Punch (Punch)
Chop (Chop)
And Block (Block)

Don't get cocky, it's doesn't get [[Rocky Shoemaker|rocky]],
We gonna move down to the next ya jockey now

Duck ([[Duck|Duck]])
Jump (Jump)
Turn (Turn)
And Pose (Pose)

Listen carefully. Jump (Jump)
Pose (Pose)
Duck (Duck)
and Turn (Turn)

Hmm, yeah, I see you're getting better,
Kick to the limit in order to get her now

Kick Punch (Kick Punch)
Chop Block (Chop Block)
Chop Kick (Chop Kick)
Punch Block (Punch Block)

It's gonna get harder now Duck & Jump (Duck & Jump)
Turn & Pose (Turn & Pose)
Duck & Turn (Duck & Turn)
Jump & Pose (Jump Pose)

Come on now, why don't you follow my words,
Because we're almost done, I'll make things worse.
I wanna see if you wanna see what it means
To be the man with the master plan. Are you the man now?

Here we go now. Kick Punch Block (Kick Punch Block)
Chop Kick Block (Chop Kick Block)
Block Turn & Kick it (Block Turn & Kick it)
Block Duck Punch (Block Duck Punch)
Duck Duck Turn (Duck Duck Turn)
Jump Kick Chop (Jump Kick Chop)
and Punch Punch Punch (Punch Punch Punch)

That's it for today.
Good job, PaRappa!
You can go to the next stage now.
Yahoo! Alright!

PaRappa, I'm so proud of you!
Congratulations!
Alright. Thank ya, teacha!
Again: what?

Man, you’re so good!
I got a [[Muscle bra|tit]]-loose memory, money
With students like you…
Wanna try a super-beginner’s course?

You’re pick—you’re pickin’ on me too fast!
I'm outta here!

[[Guitar Hero]] on [[PlayStation 3]]
Don't press the PS button after select hang, see?
Make sure you hook up with the converter controller
Dude, rock on, yo! Nananananaaaa!

Rap, rap, rap! That's a wrap!</poem>

==Campaign==
[[File:Stink Lines by Archwig.jpg|thumb|Artist's interpretation]]

Chris's video made it into the top 10, probably because a little more than 10 people entered. The winner was to be selected from a vote by PlayStation Underground members in [[July 2007]].

At [[The GAMe PLACe]], Chris handed out fliers telling people to vote for him. To ensure success, he read everything off the flier to each person before giving the flier to them. Of course, no one voted for Chris.<ref>[[Mimms and Lucas Q&A#Chris's history and personality]]</ref> He took matters into his own hands by stuffing the ballot with an endless stream of votes on different fake accounts.

Chris also badgered his half-brother [[Cole Smithey]] to vote for him. In return for his vote, Cole asked Chris to find out from their [[Barbara Chandler|mother]] about the real identity of Cole's biological father.<ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-07-21.PNG|21 July 2007 email]]</ref> Chris wasn't interested in Cole's plight, and in return Cole never voted for him.

On the day before voting ended, Chris posted his own reviews of the top 10 videos in his [[PSN Blogs#31 July 2007 12:59 — Last Day to VOTE, Rappers!|PSN blog]]. {{clear}}

{{quote|Such honesty of his situation and devotion for his lucky girlfriend adds great emotions to his performance. The visually appealing effects added the best humor and biggest laugh I had among the bunch. I enjoyed the fun background of his assumed-to-be bedroom. And his informative feedback on playing [[Guitar Hero]] on Playstation 3 was truly a wise and great addition. Also, he has nailed the lyrics A-Capella. :) As this brave [[autistic|AUTISTIC]] warrior so creatively put it at the end, "Rap, Rap, Rap, That's a Wrap!" Truly the cherry on the top of the sundae. A perfect score of 5/5 Stars for his marvelous effort, and smiling at knowing he looked a bit stupid. :)|Chris, describing his video in third person}}

==Results==

{{quote|Changing the lyrics will result in disqualification.|Official contest rules}}

[[Image:Cchanmegan.jpg|thumb|Chris thought that he could easily win the contest and the heart of his Sweetest [[Megan]]. Chris was, not surprisingly, wrong.]]

The competition was won by [[Adam Stackhouse]], whom Chris bears a grudge against as he felt Adam broke "da rules"<ref>[[PSN Blogs#31 July 2007 12:59 — Last Day to VOTE, Rappers!|PSN blog, 31 July 2007]]</ref> by having music and multiple people in his entry. Chris loathed the 2nd and 3rd place winners for having music as well. In actuality, the beatboxing in Adam's video counts as ''a cappella''. Furthermore, another top 10 finalist claimed that he had removed his own music to avoid breaking the rules, but [[Sony]] said it was fine.<ref>[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fWwfRqMZ6QE Momo :: Chop Chop Master Onion Showdown (w/music)] video on [[YouTube]]</ref>

The irony is Chris actually violated [http://images.innovyx.net/dp/scea/PSP/adhoc/062507/rules.html?ILC-Boards&LINK=CHOPCHOP062607 da rules] by making up bits and pieces of his own lyrics, as seen above. Just about the only logical reason Chris got as far as he did is that the judges had ''never quite seen anything like this before.''

Relentless vote stuffing did earn Chris a reward, however. The rules state that finalists would "...get their Submissions published on PlayStation.com, and will receive a copy of the game PaRappa the Rapper for the PSP® (PlayStation®Portable) system and some PaRappa branded premium items such as a PSP skin, PSP charm, and a PaRappa signature beanie (ARV $60)." Or, as Chris explains in [[PS3 History level]], "copy of the PSP version of the PSOne classic, a charm, HIS hat, and 5 PSP-1000 Skins." (No, we have no idea why "HIS" is all capitalized. PaRappa is neither divine in nature, nor exactly a paragon of masculinity.)
{{-}}
==Aftermath==

Because Chris was infuriated that he did not win the trip to Seattle, he sent an e-mail to the company that ran the contest to cry foul on [[Chris E-mails 2007#August|03 August 2007]]:

{{quote|[[Chris and His Ego|I REALLY WANTED THAT TRIP]] SO I COULD HAVE A CHANCE TO IMPRESS MY SWEETEST MEGAN AND POSSIBLY FULFILL MY DREAM OF GETTING MARRIED AND SOON HAVE A DAUGHTER NAMED [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|CRYSTAL]]. YET NOW I, A FRUSTRATED HIGH-FUNCTIONALLY AUTISTIC 25-YEAR OLD VIRGIN, HAVE BEEN BALLZ-BROKEN LIKE I HAVE THROUGH A BIG CHUNK OF MY LIFE IN AMERICA'S FAVORITE GAME, "[[Kick the Autistic|KICK THE AUTISTIC]]!" *[[sigh]]*

I had my fantasies of having fun with Megan, taking her to a really extravagent ''[sic]'' destination (I am not rich), taking a long-wanted tour of the [[Nintendo]] of America company tour, with her, playing [[Guitar Hero]] against the guy in the PaRappa costume, jamming with Megan in the hotel room and possibly our [[Chris and sex|first time in the bed]]... *sigh*

[[CWC_is_Sad|Life can be soooooooooo unfair and f***ing corrupt.]]

But I digress; TAKE THE A-CAPELLA RULE TO THE MAX on those THREE out of ten videos.

Take care; Christian Weston Chandler. (:_( |}}

[[File:Th WillyWonkaYouLose.gif|thumb|right|Sony's response to Chris's plea for an appeal]]

Yes, Chris really did tell a complete stranger he should have won that contest because he wanted to fuck his best friend.

On 4 August, Chris raged multiple times on his [[PSN Blogs#4 August 2007 — Adam Stackhouse!!!|PSN blog]] against [[Adam Stackhouse]] and the other winners, using his favorite "[[Kick the Autistic]]" crutch. When people advised him to relax, he told them to shut up. As a result, he was put on a time out by an admin.

Two days later, Chris continued his rampage against Adam Stackhouse, during which he created a fake [http://web.archive.org/web/20071108233910/http://members.aol.com/CWCSonichu/EPPromotions283.html webpage] designed to show himself as the true winner of the contest. He went around various PSN News posts and left comments with the following:<ref>http://blog.us.playstation.com/2007/08/warhawk-goes-gold/comment-page-9/</ref><ref>http://blog.us.playstation.com/2007/08/comment-monitoring/comment-page-4/</ref>

{{quote|I wanted to mention a small concern… there is a link to the True Real Winner of the Chop Chop Master Onion Contest at
http://groups.myspace.com/CWCandFriendsCustoms.
Yet, when I click the link on us.playstation.com, I get a different “Winner”.
I Do Not Know Who To Believe! Do I believe the Official-Rule-Violating adamstackhouse, or do I believe the Honest, Autistic CWCSonichu?}}

During Christian's struggle to be recognized as the rightful winner of the contest, Megan informed him that she was glad he lost and that she would never have gone with him on the trip if he had won. Also, Chris claims to have contracted a "[[dirty crapped briefs|gut virus]]" due to the strain on his body making this video.

There are actually two versions of the video. The one that Chris uploaded later to his YouTube channel has an additional photograph of Megan between the first and second verses. Either this version is the original version ''before'' Megan broke up with Chris, and Chris had to remove her picture to make amends, or the video with the picture was made ''much'' later, due to Chris's pangs of agony over long-lost love.

Regarding Adam, Chris made a video where, in silence, he [[CWC is Angry|repeatedly shot with a toy gun at a photo of Adam]].

On 31 [[October 2007|October]], Chris made a fake Parappa profile on MySpace to comfort himself on losing the contest. Parappatherapingdog. Good job.<ref>http://web.archive.org/web/20080705130230/http://www.myspace.com/sonichucwc</ref>

==Fan videos==
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = CWC-Tok
| video = {{#ev:youtube|NadyUs_DWK8}}
| Maker = {{Liquid|text}}
| Stardate = 9 January 2010
| Video Type = Remix
}}

==Sauces==
<references />

==See also==
*[[Adam Stackhouse]]
*[[GameStop Be A Star Sweepstakes]]
*[[CWC is Angry]]
*''[[PaRappa the Rapper]]''
*[[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes]]

==Download==
*[http://www.megaupload.com/?d=FFI3HKPS Original file]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Soul Calibur|Chris-chan vs. Mary Lee Walsh]]|nextlink=[[CWC is Angry]]|}}
{{Music Videos}}
[[Category: Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]][[Category: Events]][[Category: Contests]][[Category: Yo! CWC Raps]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, 2007| 2007-06-29]]

Animal Crossing

2011-05-28T01:38:19Z

Baxter: /* Chris and Animal Crossing */

[[Image:CWCAnimalCrossing.jpg|thumb|''Animal Crossing'' for the Wii.]]
[[Image:Accityfolkschurchuad.jpg|thumb|Despite being only minor characters who (supposedly) would make a cameo in the game, Chris felt he should make a box art focusing on Sonichu and Rosechu.]]

'''''Animal Crossing''''' by [[Nintendo]] was one of [[Chris]]'s favorite games before ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]'' came out. Worldwide, the game has been released in three incarnations: [[Wikipedia:Animal Crossing|''Animal Crossing'']] (GameCube), [[Wikipedia:Animal Crossing: Wild World|''Animal Crossing: Wild World'']] (DS) and [[Wikipedia:Animal Crossing: City Folk|''Animal Crossing: City Folk'']] (''Let's Go to the City'' for Europeans) (Wii).

==About ''Animal Crossing''==
All of the games in the series involve the player character moving in a town populated by animals, doing random jobs for them to earn rent money, going fishing, catching bugs, filling up the art/fossil/bug/fish collections at the local museum and, in general, trying to make the town a happy place to live.

In other words, everything Chris avoids doing in real life.

== Chris and ''Animal Crossing'' ==
The series obviously appeals to Chris: the milieu is a cartoony small rural town of bright happy colors, everyone in the city is nice to you, there's no violence at all, and most importantly, you're never in any hurry to do anything. It's perfect for people who [[autism|avoid prickly-wicklies because they cause distress]] and [[stress|crash into slumber if they have to do anything particularly demanding]].

Aside of making the following weird and puzzling video productions, he has also picked up a few nuggets of wisdom from the games. Blathers, the owl who runs the museum in the games, has the habit of rambling about things you donate to the museum, until he realizes he's boring you, at which point he usually ends the infodump with "but I digress..." Chris said he picked up this phrase from the game, yet tends to use the phrase only in writing and not when he's actually boring people to tears in other forms of communication.

=== The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special ===
{{main|The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special}}
Chris made this video in honor of his parents' anniversary. It would have been kind of cute if Chris was six at the time, but now it's just sad.

This video is notable for introducing the ''Animal Crossing'' versions of both Bob and Barbara. This wouldn't be exactly damning if they had been created ''just'' for this video special, but it appears that the characters have fully decorated houses of their own...''and'' the house loans have been fully paid up (signified by the statues in front of the train station). Fully paying up the house loan takes an incredibly long time in game - and this video shows that he's done it ''at least'' four times.

=== ''Animal Crossing'' Documentary ===
{{main|Animal Crossing Documentary}}
The ''Animal Crossing'' Documentary, featuring Chris's incarnation of [[CWCville]] and [[CWCcity]] in the GC ''Animal Crossing'', is one of the great cinematic achievements Chris has made. Regular players of the game may notice a few things, such as the fact that while wasting time is unavoidable while playing this game, Chris is clearly wasting way too much time on this game. And that even when he fully paid his mortgage, he still had no idea how to sell multiple items at once.

=== Sonichu and Rosechu as characters ===
{{main|Miyamoto Saga}}
In 2009 a genius troll concocted a screenshot of [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] as playable characters and told Chris Nintendo was planning to release them on his 27th birthday, but - for some mysterious reason - this plan never came to fruition.

<gallery style="margin: 0px auto 0px auto;">
Image:CWCShirtAC.jpg|You too can dress like Chris!
Image:Sonichu and Rosechu Approval for ACCityFolk.jpg|Sonichu and Rosechu.
Image:ACCityFolkSonichuRosechu.jpg|Chris's drawing of the Sonichu and Rosechu characters for the game, with special instructions on how they should be made, dated '06 [[January 2009]].
</gallery>

=== Chris's Sonichu ''Animal Crossing'' cards ===
Chris made a bunch of character cards for GameCube ''Animal Crossing''.

{{collapsible
|Chris's ''Animal Crossing'' Cards
|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:088-ACCWC.jpg
Image:097-ACCWCBck.jpg
Image:123-ACCChan.jpg
Image:124-ACChanBck.jpg
Image:161-ACSchu1.jpg
Image:162-ACSchu1Bck.jpg
Image:164-ACSonee.jpg
Image:165-ACSoneeBck.jpg
Image:187-ACSchu2.jpg
Image:188-ACSchu2Bck.jpg
Image:207-ACMetonic.jpg
Image:208-CMetonicBck.jpg
Image:214-ACUltSchu.jpg
Image:215-ACUltSchuBck.jpg
Image:220-ACMSchu.jpg
Image:229-ACRchu.jpg
Image:230-ACRchuBck.jpg
Image:231-ACRosey.jpg
Image:232-ACRoseyBck.jpg
Image:243-ACVamprosa.jpg
Image:244-ACVamprosaBck.jpg
Image:248-ACBchu.jpg
Image:249-ACBchuBck.jpg
Image:257-ACWild.jpg
Image:258-ACWildBck.jpg
Image:262-ACBubbles.jpg
Image:263-ACBubblesBck.jpg
Image:267-ACAngelica.jpg
Image:268-ACAngelicaBck.jpg
Image:272-ACPunchy.jpg
Image:273-ACPunchyBck.jpg
Image:277-ACMagi.jpg
Image:278-ACMagiBck.jpg
Image:283-ACFlame.jpg
Image:284-ACFlameBck.jpg
Image:286-ACBionic.jpg
Image:287-ACBionicBck.jpg
Image:290-ACWes.jpg
Image:291-ACWesBck.jpg
Image:292-ACWesLi.jpg
Image:293-ACWesLiBck.jpg
Image:297-ACSarah.jpg
Image:298-ACSarahBck.jpg
Image:300-ACSarhamah.jpg
Image:301-ACSarhamahBck.jpg
Image:305-ACMegan.jpg
Image:306-ACMeganBck.jpg
Image:314-ACMegagi.jpg
Image:315-ACMegagiBck.jpg
Image:381-ACNaitsirhc.jpg
Image:382-ACNaitsirhcBck.jpg
Image:383-ACKel.jpg
Image:384-ACKelBck.jpg
</gallery>}}

=== Chris-chan's ''Animal Crossing'' friend codes ===
* ''City Folk'': 4124-9531-8122
* ''Wild World'': 0558-9666-5003

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:Animal Crossing - Wii Box.jpg
Image:AnimalCrissingCWCEdition.jpg
</gallery>
</center>

==See also==
*[[Animal Crossing Documentary|''Animal Crossing'' Documentary]]
*[[Shigeru Miyamoto]]
*[[Takashi Tezuka]]

[[Category:Video Games]]

Tomgirl Pictures

2011-05-03T22:16:06Z

Baxter: /* Gallery of Chris-tran */

{{Honest}}
[[File:I am tomgirl.jpg|center|350px]]
[[File:TG1.png|center|300px]]

[[File:Tomgirlart.jpg|thumb|250px]]
One day, [[Chris]] decided to cross-dress. Then take pictures of it. Then go out in [[Charlottesville Fashion Square|public]] and take pictures of it. The pictures were leaked by [[Surfshack Tito]] on the 28 April 2011. Why Chris decided to change his look are not yet known, however it can be speculated that Chris is trying to get some [[china]] using the logic that [[Tiffany Gowen|"Tomboys"]] tend to go for [[Homos|"Tomgirls"]] naturally.

===Chris's outfit===
* Bright green nail polish
* Earrings (a purple glass stud and a blue ring) - note that piercing the right ear is traditionally code for [[Homos|homosexuality]]; guess which one Chris pierced twice?
* Women's sandals
* Blue eyeliner
* Jeans
* Blue string top
*Black thong
*A silver ring<ref>[[:File:TG6.jpg]]</ref> (note that silver rings have been used to symbolize a pledge of [[F Abstinence|abstinence]] until [[Lovely Weather|marriage]]<ref>[http://www.silverringthing.com/]</ref>
* A red and blue sweater vest (tank top) with a red shirt underneath it
* Red lipstick
* A new pair of [[glasses]]

== Gallery of Chris-tran ==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:TG2.jpg|Tomgirl car in ''[[ModNation Racers]]''
Image:TG3.jpg|The quote is "When government fears the people, there is freedom..." by [[A Hike|Thomas Jefferson]].
Image:TG4.jpg
Image:TG5.jpg|Chris matched the Color of his [[Amnyfest Ring|high school ring]] with his new pair of sandals.
File:TG6.jpg
File:TG7.jpg|Left wing buccaneer, right ear [[Homos|queer]].
File:TG8.jpg|Not the first time that Chris has covered his face in [[pickle]]s and white goo. He's using the [[Plush Breasts]] as a pillow.
File:TG9.jpg|You just know this picture will be used in the paper when Chris finally kills [[Michael Snyder|someone]].
File:TG10.jpg
File:TG11.jpg
File:TG12.jpg
File:TG13.jpg|DAT ASS
File:TG14.jpg
File:TG15.jpg|[[Barbara|Barb 2.0]]
File:TG16.jpg
File:TG17.jpg
File:TG18.jpg|GOODBYE HORSES
File:TG19.jpg
File:TG20.jpg|The PlayStation Move SharpShooter doesn't make the look any manlier.
File:TG21.jpg
File:TG22.jpg
File:TG23.jpg
File:TG24.jpg|Please note the [[Medallions_of_Fail#The_Asperchu_Medallion_.28a.k.a._The_Medallion_of_Win.3F.29|Asperchu Medallion]] on the right of the picture.
File:TG25.jpg
File:TG26.jpg
</gallery>
</center>

==See also==
*[[Anime_Wings|Anime Wings]]
*[[Homos]]
*[[Chris and fashion]]

==References==
<references/>
{{CWC-isms}}
[[Category: CWC-isms]]
[[Category:Historical Documents]]
[[Category:Homos]]

Tomgirl Pictures

2011-05-03T22:15:25Z

Baxter: /* Gallery of Chris-tran */

{{Honest}}
[[File:I am tomgirl.jpg|center|350px]]
[[File:TG1.png|center|300px]]

[[File:Tomgirlart.jpg|thumb|250px]]
One day, [[Chris]] decided to cross-dress. Then take pictures of it. Then go out in [[Charlottesville Fashion Square|public]] and take pictures of it. The pictures were leaked by [[Surfshack Tito]] on the 28 April 2011. Why Chris decided to change his look are not yet known, however it can be speculated that Chris is trying to get some [[china]] using the logic that [[Tiffany Gowen|"Tomboys"]] tend to go for [[Homos|"Tomgirls"]] naturally.

===Chris's outfit===
* Bright green nail polish
* Earrings (a purple glass stud and a blue ring) - note that piercing the right ear is traditionally code for [[Homos|homosexuality]]; guess which one Chris pierced twice?
* Women's sandals
* Blue eyeliner
* Jeans
* Blue string top
*Black thong
*A silver ring<ref>[[:File:TG6.jpg]]</ref> (note that silver rings have been used to symbolize a pledge of [[F Abstinence|abstinence]] until [[Lovely Weather|marriage]]<ref>[http://www.silverringthing.com/]</ref>
* A red and blue sweater vest (tank top) with a red shirt underneath it
* Red lipstick
* A new pair of [[glasses]]

== Gallery of Chris-tran ==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:TG2.jpg|Tomgirl car in ''[[ModNation Racers]]''
Image:TG3.jpg|The quote is "When government fears the people, there is freedom..." by [[A Hike|Thomas Jefferson]].
Image:TG4.jpg
Image:TG5.jpg|Chris matched the Color of his [[Amnyfest Ring|high school ring]] with his new pair of sandals.
File:TG6.jpg
File:TG7.jpg|Left wing buccaneer, right ear [[Homos|queer]].
File:TG8.jpg|Not the first time that Chris has covered his face in [[pickle]]s and white goo. He's using the [[Plush Breasts]] as a pillow.
File:TG9.jpg|You just know this picture will be used in the paper when Chris finally kills [[Michael Snyder|someone]].
File:TG10.jpg
File:TG11.jpg
File:TG12.jpg
File:TG13.jpg|DAT ASS
File:TG14.jpg
File:TG15.jpg|[[Barbara|Barb 2.0]]
File:TG16.jpg
File:TG17.jpg
File:TG18.jpg
File:TG19.jpg
File:TG20.jpg|The PlayStation Move SharpShooter doesn't make the look any manlier.
File:TG21.jpg
File:TG22.jpg|GOODBYE HORSES
File:TG23.jpg
File:TG24.jpg|Please note the [[Medallions_of_Fail#The_Asperchu_Medallion_.28a.k.a._The_Medallion_of_Win.3F.29|Asperchu Medallion]] on the right of the picture.
File:TG25.jpg
File:TG26.jpg
</gallery>
</center>

==See also==
*[[Anime_Wings|Anime Wings]]
*[[Homos]]
*[[Chris and fashion]]

==References==
<references/>
{{CWC-isms}}
[[Category: CWC-isms]]
[[Category:Historical Documents]]
[[Category:Homos]]

Talk:Tomgirl Pictures

2011-04-30T17:25:55Z

Baxter: /* Disturbing revelation */

In case anyone's wondering, the images are called "TG#" because TomGirl. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 19:09, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
* '''MY EYES!''' CAN NOT UNSEE! [[User:CFA|CFA]] 19:13, 28 April 2011 (PDT)CFA

Is there ANY backstory to this?!? What I don't understand is that he 1) went into PUBLIC wearing this stuff (there's a picture of him at his mall) and 2) It looks like he shaved his underarms in one or two pictures...WHY?! Dear God why?! --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 19:26, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
* Pretty sure he always shaved his underarms. I don't know why I know that. --[[User:Kwippleton|Kwippleton]] 19:38, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
:I guess you don't understand hygiene, 4Macie. That's besides esthetics. --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 06:02, 29 April 2011 (PDT)
*Yes but A. This is Chris, hygiene is a foreign word to him and B. Its aesthetics. [[User:CFA|CFA]] 20:35, 29 April 2011 (PDT)CFA
:The article could use some clarification as to what the hell is going on here. There's gotta be some sort of story behind this. What's the deal? This is some of Chris's weirdest antics yet. Just when you think the lulcow ran dry... [[User:Abyssal|Abyssal]] 19:42, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

Note that both ears are pierced, not just the gay ear (see: cucumbers on eyes pic). Also, that's his real hair and the images aren't censored; he's wearing a g-string. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 19:54, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
: Are they really pierced or are they those clip on/magnet ones?? Is there anyway we can tell?? --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 20:04, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
:: They're real. Trust me. If they were clip ons, there would be more of an indent. I'm also pretty sure that clip ons are bigger. The ones I had as a kid certainly were, and I was pretty into those things. [[User:PedoforkBait|PedoforkBait]] 20:08, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
::: That would make sense...I bet the ring/hoop ones are fake though, there's no hole for them in other pictures (unless he got them later). And why are they so oddly placed?? They aren't on the lobe like they should be...unless they've changed where they put them now (I got mine when I was 7). Or...could he have done them himself??? --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 20:13, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
:::: They are real. Also, I'm not aware of any way to have a stud clip-on. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 20:35, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
*At this point, he's gotta be fucking with us. He wants to gross us out, so we don't bother him. --[[User:TheIronFjord|TheIronFjord]] 20:05, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
: You think he pierced his ears to get us to leave him alone? [[User:PeachyKeen|PeachyKeen]] 20:20, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

He's using a real camara to take his picture in some of these, that's unusual. I wonder what the poor guy who had to develop them was thinking. O_o [[User:Lunachu|Lunachu]] 20:31, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

This is probably a long shot, however I really think he did this for a girl. Most likely a girl who liked to dress up as a guy and wanted Chris to do the same. Or it's a really, really good troll. Either way, whoever made him do this is really good at what they do, because these pictures are FUCKING DISGUSTING. [[User:Mikau|Mikau]] 20:54, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
: [[:File:TG3.jpg|"...when the government fears the people, there is liberty"]]. I'm sure this new heartsweet has her Guy Fawkes mask ready. --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' <span style="font-size:smaller;">([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]])</span> 02:24, 29 April 2011 (PDT)
* Let me tell you something, and like I said, this really isn't really the place to say it. But nonetheless, whenever I try to rationalize what Chris does, I usually get disappointed because the simple fact of the matter is - Chris is just fucked up.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 05:24, 29 April 2011 (PDT)

The saddest thing about all this is that this didn't even suprise me in the slightest, I wasn't even mildly shocked to see Chris in drag, or even with a sock on his flacid manhood. --[[User:Gustofwind|Gustofwind]] 21:31, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
: many are saying it isn't a sock...it's a g-string. You can't see the strings holding it up because of his gut roll over but when he does the picture of his butt, you can see the black thong part in the crack.....if you REALLY want to look that is. --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 21:35, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

Goddaemnd monkey-assed hell. Well, what do we do with this page? Start describing shit? In fuckin' ''detail''?! It could stand as is, like the CWCki's own personal 'shock page'...--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 22:00, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

INFO, somebody has it. Where are the pictures from? Did he upload them somewhere? Or is it old stuff made public by trolls? --[[User:Cuprite|Cuprite]] 22:05, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
:It's all recent and Clyde got it by hacking Chris' PSN. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 22:09, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
::Excellent, this, coupled with the PSN being down, is probably the best chance we'll get at him returning. --[[User:Cuprite|Cuprite]] 22:13, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
::PSN has been offline for a week all because of these photos, spread the word [[User:Acousticvirgin|Acousticvirgin]] 22:15, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
:::In the meantime, someone try to find an appropreate picture of King Hippo from the Captain N cartoon; he also crossdresses, and he's also a fat, useless, discolored retard.--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 22:17, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

In some of these, he looks uncannily like a fat version of Buffalo Bill. [[User:Vulture-chan|Vulture-chan]] 22:30, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

I was about to ask if the PSN take down made him go further down the crazy hole o_o [[User:Raku|Raku]] 23:30, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
:Chris has been at this a while, and you can tell because growing out hair takes a while. The PSN going down was coincidence. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 00:49, 29 April 2011 (PDT)
I also love the claims that he is "straight". Yeah, Chris is as "straight" as a circle >_> [[User:Raku|Raku]] 23:34, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
: Circle? Try "ampersand." --[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 00:25, 29 April 2011 (PDT)

here's something everybody should think about: chris is wearing his mom's clothes. i mean surely he didn't pay for any of this shit when there are MOUNTAINS of free clothes blocking up whole rooms of his house. [[User:Acousticvirgin|Acousticvirgin]] 00:36, 29 April 2011 (PDT)
:Already wore his mum's underwear that one time. Wouldn't be a new thing for him. [[User:BlueYonder|BlueYonder]] 01:19, 29 April 2011 (PDT)

I wonder if Bob has caught this yet. [[User:Westbound|Westbound]] 05:08, 29 April 2011 (PDT)

*Guys, please, remember - this page is [[CWCki:NOTAFORUM|not a forum]]. Srsly, I told you fuckers that that ModNation Racer character wasn't Crystal.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 05:22, 29 April 2011 (PDT)

Anyone with some solid info about this? Do this is a new saga? Who asked him to dress that way? Do we got any metadata linked to the picture so we can have time/date info? This is the best update for months and we got so little info on it. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 06:00, 29 April 2011 (PDT)
*I can talk to Tito about getting the raw images so we can get some metadata behind these.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 05:24, 30 April 2011 (PDT)
*Could he be trying to be Crystal the Imaginary Twin sister? He tends to stick to the stripey clothing and jeans, which is pretty much what she wore [[User:PoppyPink|PoppyPink]] 00:24, 30 April 2011 (GMT)

*This is pure speculation, but do you think it's Mic, the one girl he talked about in the Autism Tutorial?--[[User:TheIronFjord|TheIronFjord]] 07:32, 29 April 2011 (PDT)

The updates are few an far between, but when they come, they are fascinating. I especially like how the Sailor Moon poster is in some of the the pics. [[User:Farm Zombie|Farm Zombie]] 17:45, 29 April 2011 (PDT)

This is going to kill Bob. Chris has evolved into a Snorlax. [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 04:01, 30 April 2011 (PDT)

== Disturbing revelation ==

*[http://www.sonichu.com/cwcki/File:TG19.jpg This pic] raises several disturbing things. First off, If you look in the background, you see the journey's sign. Why does this matter you ask?
[http://www.simon.com/mall/MallDirectoryPrint.aspx?id=117 Fashion Square Mall Directory]
Journey's in the section labeled G on the map. Right near exact center of the mall, meaning he walked around like that near small children. It also explains where he might have picked up everything, for the women's Belk is right around the corner. The disturbing part is he walked around the mall a hop skip and a jump from where I work! And before you ask, no I didn't see him drag. Side note, he is wearing his ring again, see [http://www.sonichu.com/cwcki/File:TG5.jpg this pic]. Also, there is a piercing pagoda in the mall. In summation, he got pierced, did up and bought his tranny clothes all in the mall most likely. [[User:CFA|CFA]] 20:32, 29 April 2011 (PDT)CFA
: Is [http://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:TG3.jpg this sign] somewhere in the mall? Is this part of some sort of cross-dressing awareness event, and is Chris just taking part? [[User:Turnabout|Turnabout]] 22:32, 29 April 2011 (PDT)
**It looks like the chalkboard Chris drew on in [[Chris's Big Night Out II]], which is in Charlottesville. That doesn't look like Chris's handwriting, so I think it's safe to assume he has a new, masculine gal-pal. [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 10:25, 30 April 2011 (PDT)

== Info? ==

Is there ANY background to this? Like: where did he get the term "TomGirl" and why does he think it means to dress up like a girl? (aka: this is cross-dressing...not being a "TomGirl") I guess it was said that this was hacked off his PS3 (PSN)..but WHY was it there in the first place?? He obviously took them for someone...he wouldn't have taken pictures of himself in drag if it was solely for his own viewing...would he??? I guess..
TL;DR: Is there any information about this??? Someone has to know something! --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 20:45, 29 April 2011 (PDT)
* Well [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tomgirl Wikipedia] Explains a tomgirl is a reverse tomboy, a guy who acts girly, a femboi in essence is a tomgirl. [[User:CFA|CFA]] 21:06, 29 April 2011 (PDT)CFA
::Hmmm...well that's a start. Though I think Chris took this one a little too far for it to still be "TomGirl"ish... Now we just need the WHY I guess. --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 21:11, 29 April 2011 (PDT)
:::For the love of fuck just shut up and wait for the inevitable infodump that will explain everything.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 21:28, 29 April 2011 (PDT)
::::*True, though pretty much what's going on has already been explained by [[Tito]] [http://789chan.org/cwc/res/53442.html here]. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 05:19, 30 April 2011 (PDT)

Talk:Tomgirl Pictures

2011-04-30T11:01:08Z

Baxter:

In case anyone's wondering, the images are called "TG#" because TomGirl. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 19:09, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
* '''MY EYES!''' CAN NOT UNSEE! [[User:CFA|CFA]] 19:13, 28 April 2011 (PDT)CFA

Is there ANY backstory to this?!? What I don't understand is that he 1) went into PUBLIC wearing this stuff (there's a picture of him at his mall) and 2) It looks like he shaved his underarms in one or two pictures...WHY?! Dear God why?! --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 19:26, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
* Pretty sure he always shaved his underarms. I don't know why I know that. --[[User:Kwippleton|Kwippleton]] 19:38, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
:I guess you don't understand hygiene, 4Macie. That's besides esthetics. --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 06:02, 29 April 2011 (PDT)
*Yes but A. This is Chris, hygiene is a foreign word to him and B. Its aesthetics. [[User:CFA|CFA]] 20:35, 29 April 2011 (PDT)CFA
:The article could use some clarification as to what the hell is going on here. There's gotta be some sort of story behind this. What's the deal? This is some of Chris's weirdest antics yet. Just when you think the lulcow ran dry... [[User:Abyssal|Abyssal]] 19:42, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

Note that both ears are pierced, not just the gay ear (see: cucumbers on eyes pic). Also, that's his real hair and the images aren't censored; he's wearing a g-string. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 19:54, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
: Are they really pierced or are they those clip on/magnet ones?? Is there anyway we can tell?? --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 20:04, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
:: They're real. Trust me. If they were clip ons, there would be more of an indent. I'm also pretty sure that clip ons are bigger. The ones I had as a kid certainly were, and I was pretty into those things. [[User:PedoforkBait|PedoforkBait]] 20:08, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
::: That would make sense...I bet the ring/hoop ones are fake though, there's no hole for them in other pictures (unless he got them later). And why are they so oddly placed?? They aren't on the lobe like they should be...unless they've changed where they put them now (I got mine when I was 7). Or...could he have done them himself??? --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 20:13, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
:::: They are real. Also, I'm not aware of any way to have a stud clip-on. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 20:35, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
*At this point, he's gotta be fucking with us. He wants to gross us out, so we don't bother him. --[[User:TheIronFjord|TheIronFjord]] 20:05, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
: You think he pierced his ears to get us to leave him alone? [[User:PeachyKeen|PeachyKeen]] 20:20, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

He's using a real camara to take his picture in some of these, that's unusual. I wonder what the poor guy who had to develop them was thinking. O_o [[User:Lunachu|Lunachu]] 20:31, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

This is probably a long shot, however I really think he did this for a girl. Most likely a girl who liked to dress up as a guy and wanted Chris to do the same. Or it's a really, really good troll. Either way, whoever made him do this is really good at what they do, because these pictures are FUCKING DISGUSTING. [[User:Mikau|Mikau]] 20:54, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
: [[:File:TG3.jpg|"...when the government fears the people, there is liberty"]]. I'm sure this new heartsweet has her Guy Fawkes mask ready. --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' <span style="font-size:smaller;">([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]])</span> 02:24, 29 April 2011 (PDT)
* Let me tell you something, and like I said, this really isn't really the place to say it. But nonetheless, whenever I try to rationalize what Chris does, I usually get disappointed because the simple fact of the matter is - Chris is just fucked up.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 05:24, 29 April 2011 (PDT)

The saddest thing about all this is that this didn't even suprise me in the slightest, I wasn't even mildly shocked to see Chris in drag, or even with a sock on his flacid manhood. --[[User:Gustofwind|Gustofwind]] 21:31, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
: many are saying it isn't a sock...it's a g-string. You can't see the strings holding it up because of his gut roll over but when he does the picture of his butt, you can see the black thong part in the crack.....if you REALLY want to look that is. --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 21:35, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

Goddaemnd monkey-assed hell. Well, what do we do with this page? Start describing shit? In fuckin' ''detail''?! It could stand as is, like the CWCki's own personal 'shock page'...--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 22:00, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

INFO, somebody has it. Where are the pictures from? Did he upload them somewhere? Or is it old stuff made public by trolls? --[[User:Cuprite|Cuprite]] 22:05, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
:It's all recent and Clyde got it by hacking Chris' PSN. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 22:09, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
::Excellent, this, coupled with the PSN being down, is probably the best chance we'll get at him returning. --[[User:Cuprite|Cuprite]] 22:13, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
::PSN has been offline for a week all because of these photos, spread the word [[User:Acousticvirgin|Acousticvirgin]] 22:15, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
:::In the meantime, someone try to find an appropreate picture of King Hippo from the Captain N cartoon; he also crossdresses, and he's also a fat, useless, discolored retard.--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 22:17, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

In some of these, he looks uncannily like a fat version of Buffalo Bill. [[User:Vulture-chan|Vulture-chan]] 22:30, 28 April 2011 (PDT)

I was about to ask if the PSN take down made him go further down the crazy hole o_o [[User:Raku|Raku]] 23:30, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
:Chris has been at this a while, and you can tell because growing out hair takes a while. The PSN going down was coincidence. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 00:49, 29 April 2011 (PDT)
I also love the claims that he is "straight". Yeah, Chris is as "straight" as a circle >_> [[User:Raku|Raku]] 23:34, 28 April 2011 (PDT)
: Circle? Try "ampersand." --[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 00:25, 29 April 2011 (PDT)

here's something everybody should think about: chris is wearing his mom's clothes. i mean surely he didn't pay for any of this shit when there are MOUNTAINS of free clothes blocking up whole rooms of his house. [[User:Acousticvirgin|Acousticvirgin]] 00:36, 29 April 2011 (PDT)
:Already wore his mum's underwear that one time. Wouldn't be a new thing for him. [[User:BlueYonder|BlueYonder]] 01:19, 29 April 2011 (PDT)

I wonder if Bob has caught this yet. [[User:Westbound|Westbound]] 05:08, 29 April 2011 (PDT)

*Guys, please, remember - this page is [[CWCki:NOTAFORUM|not a forum]]. Srsly, I told you fuckers that that ModNation Racer character wasn't Crystal.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 05:22, 29 April 2011 (PDT)

Anyone with some solid info about this? Do this is a new saga? Who asked him to dress that way? Do we got any metadata linked to the picture so we can have time/date info? This is the best update for months and we got so little info on it. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 06:00, 29 April 2011 (PDT)

*Could he be trying to be Crystal the Imaginary Twin sister? He tends to stick to the stripey clothing and jeans, which is pretty much what she wore [[User:PoppyPink|PoppyPink]] 00:24, 30 April 2011 (GMT)

*This is pure speculation, but do you think it's Mic, the one girl he talked about in the Autism Tutorial?--[[User:TheIronFjord|TheIronFjord]] 07:32, 29 April 2011 (PDT)

The updates are few an far between, but when they come, they are fascinating. I especially like how the Sailor Moon poster is in some of the the pics. [[User:Farm Zombie|Farm Zombie]] 17:45, 29 April 2011 (PDT)

This is going to kill Bob. Chris has evolved into a Snorlax. [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 04:01, 30 April 2011 (PDT)

== Disturbing revelation ==

*[http://www.sonichu.com/cwcki/File:TG19.jpg This pic] raises several disturbing things. First off, If you look in the background, you see the journey's sign. Why does this matter you ask?
[http://www.simon.com/mall/MallDirectoryPrint.aspx?id=117 Fashion Square Mall Directory]
Journey's in the section labeled G on the map. Right near exact center of the mall, meaning he walked around like that near small children. It also explains where he might have picked up everything, for the women's Belk is right around the corner. The disturbing part is he walked around the mall a hop skip and a jump from where I work! And before you ask, no I didn't see him drag. Side note, he is wearing his ring again, see [http://www.sonichu.com/cwcki/File:TG5.jpg this pic]. Also, there is a piercing pagoda in the mall. In summation, he got pierced, did up and bought his tranny clothes all in the mall most likely. [[User:CFA|CFA]] 20:32, 29 April 2011 (PDT)CFA
: Is [http://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:TG3.jpg this sign] somewhere in the mall? Is this part of some sort of cross-dressing awareness event, and is Chris just taking part? [[User:Turnabout|Turnabout]] 22:32, 29 April 2011 (PDT)

== Info? ==

Is there ANY background to this? Like: where did he get the term "TomGirl" and why does he think it means to dress up like a girl? (aka: this is cross-dressing...not being a "TomGirl") I guess it was said that this was hacked off his PS3 (PSN)..but WHY was it there in the first place?? He obviously took them for someone...he wouldn't have taken pictures of himself in drag if it was solely for his own viewing...would he??? I guess..
TL;DR: Is there any information about this??? Someone has to know something! --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 20:45, 29 April 2011 (PDT)
* Well [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tomgirl Wikipedia] Explains a tomgirl is a reverse tomboy, a guy who acts girly, a femboi in essence is a tomgirl. [[User:CFA|CFA]] 21:06, 29 April 2011 (PDT)CFA
::Hmmm...well that's a start. Though I think Chris took this one a little too far for it to still be "TomGirl"ish... Now we just need the WHY I guess. --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 21:11, 29 April 2011 (PDT)
:::For the love of fuck just shut up and wait for the inevitable infodump that will explain everything.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 21:28, 29 April 2011 (PDT)

April 2011

2011-04-08T20:50:07Z

Baxter: anal grammar

'''April 2011''' has begun with Chris continuing to play [[PS3]] and hiding from [[troll]]s.

==Events==
*None as of yet.

{{Timeline}}
[[Category:Chronology]]

CWC with Bible - Leviticus

2011-03-10T01:20:14Z

Baxter:

{{quote|So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone....| John 8:7, a Bible verse Chris seemed to miss}}

{{quote|Judge not, that ye be not judged.| Matthew 7:1, another verse Chris seemed to miss}}

On March 8, [[Chris]] watched an episode of ''[[Family Guy]]'' ("Family Gay"), in which Peter Griffin becomes [[homos]]exual, and Stewie cites the Bible verse Leviticus 18:22 in opposition of this development. Because of this, Chris was inspired to make "'''CWC with Bible - Leviticus'''".

After his bible reading, Chris mentions that he is hard at work on a new [[Sonichu medallion]], and publicly announces that he is no longer focusing the Internet as a front in his [[Love Quest]]. Instead, he has begun using a novelty book written by a nine-year-old to help him talk to girls in person. This is another case of Chris being a hypocrite as there are a [[Religion#Breaking_the_Levitical_Laws|number of things in Leviticus Chris doesn't follow]].

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC with Bible - Leviticus
| image = {{#ev:youtube|Fc2nDqoH-Zk}}
| Stardate = 10 [[March 2009]]
| Maker = [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:homosn.png]] Homos
| Shirt = [[Image:Redyellowstripeshirt.png]] Red/yellow striped shirt
| previous = [[Captain's_Log,_Stardate_March_4th,_2009#Epilogue|CWC Calls Out Max]]
| next = [[CWC Callout for Miss Emily and Stephanie#Watch|CWC Callout for Miss Emily and Stephanie]]
}}

{{quote|…I ''stand'' behind the truths of the Holy God and Lord.}}

===Transcript===

[[Captain's Log]], Stardate: March… 9th, 2009.

I am here just to, uh, remind everybody I am wearing my ring. And I want everybody to know that when I am wearing my ring, I am being most honest and upfront, just like I did when I wore my medallion. And incidentally, I'm working on another one. Hopefully, I'll have it coated in metal.

But also, on another note, I would like to, uh, state an obvious fact that has been revealed in the latest episode of ''[[Family Guy]]'', and backs me up on the f—on the fact that… [[homos|ho-mo-sex-u-al-i-ty-and-gay-ness]] is just plain wrong. And Stewie has quoted that—the Bible verse that has just—that basically says it in a nutshell. Leviticus: chapter 18, verse 22:

<blockquote>“Do not lie with a man as one lies with a woman; that is detestable.”<ref>Leviticus 18:22 (New International Version)</ref></blockquote>

And to go on further, among the first number of verses:

<blockquote>“The Lord said to Boses, ‘Speak to the Israelites and say to them: “I am the Lord your God. You must ''not'' do as they do in Egypt, where you used to live, and you must… not do as they do in the land of Canaan, where I am bringing you. Do not follow their practices. You must obey my laws and be careful to follow my decrees. I am the Lord your God. Keep my decrees and laws, for the man who obeys them and will live by them. I am the Lord.”’”<ref>Leviticus 18:1-5 (New International Version)</ref></blockquote>

And majority of the laws is basically do not sleep with, uh, your relati—with your ''close'' relatives or the, uh, relation of those relatives. And, uh, because in the end, it just described here, uh... from, uh, 25, and so on.

<blockquote>“Even the land was defiled…”<ref>Leviticus 18:25 (New International Version)</ref></blockquote>

…among such things…

<blockquote>“…so, I punished it for its sin, and the land vomited out its inhabitants. But you must keep my decrees and my laws. The native-born and the aliens living among you must not do any of these detestable things…”<ref>Leviticus 18:25-27 (New International Version)</ref></blockquote>

Especially sleeping with a man as you would a woman... you homos.

Now, where was I? Oh, yeah...

<blockquote>“…for all these things were done by the people who lived in the land before you, and the land became defiled. And if you defile the land, it will vomit you out as it vomited out the nations that were before you. Everyone who does any of these detestable things… such persons must be cut off from their people. Keep my requirements, and do not follow any of the detestable customs that were practiced before you… came and- before you came, and do not defile yourselves with them. I am the Lord your God.”<ref>Leviticus 18:27-30 (New International Version)</ref></blockquote>

This was chapter 18 of Leviticus, in the Holy Bible. And verse 22.

[''shakes head and shrugs''] Sorry, homos… but I ''stand'' behind the truths of the Holy God and Lord. Thank you, and have a pleasant day.

[''jump cut'']

And, uh, also, just to add another note: I am also—uh, I have also stopped in trying to find true love and romance over the Internet, and have currently—I have currently at lea—or—and possibly temporarily ceased to—ceased talking from instant messages and the Mumble on the Internet. I've taken the first step into encouraging myself to actually talking to the women around here. And I quote the book that I have learned about from the John Tesh radio show, as well as my, uh, pastoral counselor: ''[[How to Talk to Girls]]'' by Alec Greven... a 9-year-old. You can find a video where he talks about his book on [http://www.amazon.com/How-Talk-Girls-Alec-Greven/dp/0061709999/ Amazon.com]. ''Great book''!

The only thing that I disagree about is the—is the fact that, uh... men are the magnets and the women, they are the metal. Because it can go either way. He just basically backs up to the fact that—ab—of us guys being the magnets—''only on their brains!'' Only on the brains. Only if they're smart enough. I mean, not every man is smart! I'm not saying I'm dumb, or naïve. But not every man is smart. So... that's a false statement, Alec. But I commend you on the rest of your words, if you're listening to this, Alec.

Thank you. Have a pleasant day.

==References==

<references />

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[CWC Update 4 March 2009]]|nextlink=[[CWC Callout for Miss Emily and Stephanie]]|}}
{{Captain's Log}}

[[Category:Captain's log entries| 2009-03-10]]
[[Category:Videos about homos| 2009-03-10]]

[[Category: Chris-chan videos, March 2009| 2009-03-10]]
[[Category:Julie saga videos| 2009-03-10]]

Sylvana

2011-03-07T02:50:37Z

Baxter: /* Biography */

[[Image:Silvana.jpg|thumb|left|Before there was a [[Pickle|penis]]]]
[[Image:Silvana34.jpg|thumb|After obtaining a penis]]

'''Silvana''' is a shape-shifting [[Wikipedia:intersex|intersex]] [[Rosechu (species)|Rosechu]] who first appeared in ''[[Sonichu's News Dash]]'' #7 and later played a major role in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].

Aside from her shape-shifting powers, she also shows some psychic ability. She was created by the same [[rainbow]] that made the [[Chaotic Combo]]. Her egg somehow ended up on [[The Moon|the Goddamn ''Moon'']], where she was raised by the evil [[Count Graduon]].

Silvana is a combination of four characters:
*[[Raichu]]
*[[Amy Rose]]
*[[Wikipedia:Umbreon|Umbreon]]
*[[wikipedia:Villains_in_Power_Rangers_in_Space#Astronema|Astronema]] from ''[[Power Rangers]] in Space'' (an evil "space princess" with purple hair who was good, but raised to be evil by a [[Graduon|powerful villain]]. [[Magi-chan|Other characters]] try to reform her to the side of good.)

==Biography==
Silvana was either named after an [[Gal-pal|acquaintance]] of [[Count Graduon]]'s named "Sylvia" or her first babblings; we are not quite sure. Count Graduon gave her the power of shape-shifting, a [[pickle|penis]], the skills of seduction and the ability "[[Chris and English|oblivious]]". During Spring Break, Silvana transforms into [[Bubbles]] to have sex with [[Blake]]. When she has sex, she secretes a paralyzing venom which leaves Blake hospitalized. She later tried to seduce Bubbles as well, but [[Magi-Chan]] convinced her not to fuck the intersex [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]]. What she actually intended to ''do'' after fucking and paralyzing everything in sight is never elaborated upon. It is believed that Silvana is meant to be a metaphor for the countless [[troll]]s who troll Chris by pretending to be hot women.

As of [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], Chris has revealed that he plans on turning Silvana into a "full" woman, and, as many trolls have repeatedly predicted, pairing her up with Magi-Chan. ''Sonichu'' #10 also shows Silvana "trolling" Chris in the guise of [[Meg Griffin]] (lending credence to the theory mentioned earlier about Silvana representing pretend females). It's also somewhat telling that Silvana didn't "troll" Chris this way ''before'' he had announced his plan to turn Silvana into a single-sex being.

According to [[Magi-Chan]]'s profile on the [[CWCipedia]], when Count Graduon's orb was shattered by [[Collosal Chan]], all of the wizard's magic had been undone, including Silvana's dick. It is said that, a week later, Magi-Chan confronted Silvana and she suddenly experienced love for the first time, telling Magi-Chan to let her sort out her feelings first before she chooses.

However, since Chris takes over half a year to churn out less than a few measly pages, we may never know the TRUE and HONEST outcome...

==The Original ''News Dash''==

[[Image:Cwcmail.png|right|thumb|200px|Chris-chan avoids explaining why she has a penis.]]

Chris writes:

<blockquote>“Recently, a black [[Rosechu]] came down from outer space in a fashionable space ship. She came down onto our Earth wreaking havoc by abducting the Sonichu Heroes. But in conjunction with [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]], the Rosechus of Earth rescued all of them. In an interview with [[Magi-Chan]] Sonichu, he said, “I’ve been communicating with her through telekinesis, and she sounded very lonesome. She said that she was a female [[Pikachu]] who was hit by a shining light from the Chaos [[Rainbow]].” The Chaos Rainbow was the rainbow made when Super Sonic collided with the Pikachu, on that fateful day in Station Square years ago. And when interviewed, the black Rosechu, who named herself, Silvana, she stated, “I abducted the Sonichus, because it was very lonesome on the moon, there were NO aliens there at all. And when I communicated with Magi-Chan, I was inspired to build my spacecraft with the remains of the shuttle that put me there in the first place<ref>http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcville/SchusNews7.htm</ref>.”</blockquote>

From this, we can assume that she was originally meant to be an avatar of Chris's loneliness. One can only imagine the pain Chris went through when circumstances forced him to corrupt her.

==See also:==
{{Fan art}}
*[[Rosechu]], who also has a [[pickle]]
*[[Megagi La Skunk]]
*[[Niggos]]
*[[The Moon|The Motherfucking Moon]]
*[[Chris and music|Lady Gaga]]

==References==
<references/>

==External links==
*[http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcville/SchuComic9TVY7P19.htm Episode 18, with Silvana's Origins]

{{Sonichu}}

[[Category:Characters]]
[[Category:Villains]]
[[Category:Rosechus]]

User talk:Baxter

2011-03-05T04:50:26Z

Baxter: /* Something to keep in mind */

Holy shit man I salute you for that pic

From the creator of the toilet explosion pic

what part of boston are you from? I'm from the south shore.--[[User:Dan Dash|Dan Dash]] 03:34, 4 July 2010 (UTC)

==Something to keep in mind==

Champthom put a warning at the top of The Iconoclast's talk page. It's pretty much directed at you. I'd pay attention to it. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] [[User_talk:Freecell|(t]]/[[Special:Contributions/Freecell|c)]] 18:30, 4 March 2011 (PST)

Aha. Thanks for the warning, old boy. Appy poly logies to yourself, and Champ if he reads this. [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 20:50, 4 March 2011 (PST)

User talk:The Iconoclast

2011-03-05T02:29:23Z

Baxter: /* JSM */

{{protip|Anyone who harasses this user WILL get banned. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 16:10, 4 March 2011 (PST)}}

== Tips ==
Messages should go on the talk page, bro. I've already moved your post over there. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 23:14, 6 January 2011 (PST)

==We're a lot alike, you and me... ==
In what way are you not like Chris? Because you seem at least as pathetic as him. I guess plagiarists need to stick together, eh? [[User:DrShoggoth|Dr. Herodotus P. Shoggoth :Doktor of the Forbidden Sciences, Medallion Guardian, Imperial Emu, Emeritus of the Ancient and Justified Order of the Turtle]]
::Lets see: Widespread <s>plagiarism</s> artistic borrowing, a lack of artistic unity, a lack of professional quality in works that are presented as such <small>(hello vanity publishing/sonichu copyright)</small>, self promotion in unrelated places, and a superpowered SI surrounded by <s>boyfriend free girls</s> women to make up for an underwhelming real life... Yeah, it's like I'm reading Sonichu<small>©</small> light. We've even got the same regurgitation of tv lines. - [[User:Kei|Kei]] 12:14, 8 January 2011 (PST)
:::You're just another faggot who says "I'm better than Chris" to justify their existence while at the same time doing the same stupid bullshit (making comics NO ONE READS) at the same time. Go away. -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 11:56, 15 January 2011 (PST)

==i don't like you==
You're just another faggot who says "I'm better than the people who troll Chris who ARE EVIL PEOPLE so therefore I'm fucking awesome" to justify their existence while at the same time doing stupid bullshit (making comics almost 5 people read) at the same time. Go away. -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 01:50, 16 January 2011 (PST)

==sup son==
Your one of my least favourite members on this board. Your litteraly homosexual, your a furry, your a juggalo, you like fat women, you wanted to fuck your mother, you mother fucker, you like to take it up the ass and suck dick and u brag about it, and u think you are way funnier than you really are. [[User:Sully|Sully]] 11:03, 16 January 2011 (PST)

==Why do you hate America's children?==
Do you ''not'' want kids to eat food that actually has some sort of nutritional value? Are you '''IN FAVOR OF CHILDHOOD OBESITY'''? [[User:Massive Dynamic|Massive Dynamic]] 14:38, 16 January 2011 (PST)

'''I don't want Michelle Obama telling me what snacks I may consume'''

The bill only applies to public schools, which are federally funded. It's the federal government passing a law that affects a federal institution. Should they not be able to control something in their own organization? It won't affect what snacks get stuck in the beard you meticulously crafted using the Spray tool in MSPaint.

And children's programming was always stupid and full of fluff. Why are you watching kiddie shows at your age, anyway? [[User:Massive Dynamic|Massive Dynamic]] 11:24, 17 January 2011 (PST)

You still didn't answer my question about why you watch so many kids shows in the first place. The 80s stuff, I guess I can understand. It makes you nostalgic for the time when we didn't have ratings and when Z. Cavariccis were popular or whatever. But why, in your late 20s did you just suddenly get into Pokemon and Histeria? Or Kim Possible for that matter.

If you had to take care of your kids or nephew or younger siblings and that's what they watched, I could see you getting a little kick out of it. Or if you were a pothead, that's a valid excuse. Potheads eat and watch all kinds of things when they're bored and high. But you're a straitlaced arch-conservative mystery "writer" who doesn't have any kids and judging by your general demeanor and your Chris-Chanian dream of returning to college solely for the cable and the coochie, you won't have any. [[User:Massive Dynamic|Massive Dynamic]] 10:23, 18 January 2011 (PST)

P.S. Your shitty comic's self-insert protagonist looks like Arthur. Stop watching PBS, son.

==Get out of bed!==
''[walks into Icon's bedroom, making furnace noises through snuffle]'' f-f-f-f-f ''[in a normal voice]'' Get out of bed! Snuffle-uffle-snuffle-uffle-snuffle-uffle-snuffle-uffle... --[[User:Snuffleupagus|Snuffleupagus]] 06:41, 17 January 2011 (PST)

==Virginal Plagiarist==
He also steals ideas, and ain't never got no sex. He did meet a girl once, and she was creeped out by him. He's still stalking her.
[[User:DrShoggoth|Dr. Herodotus P. Shoggoth :Doktor of the Forbidden Sciences, Medallion Guardian, Imperial Emu, Emeritus of the Ancient and Justified Order of the Turtle]] 10:05, 17 January 2011 (PST)

== Nice Site-- NOT ==

McAfee found a virus the moment I opened your site in a new tab. Now I'm never reading your shit.--[[User:Trombonista|trombonista]] 16:20, 17 January 2011 (PST)

==College Relationships==
What's wrong with sluts? Just because you couldn't fuck a slut? What's you plan? "Hey guys! There's this slut running around, and she totally wants dick, and she's rela easy as long as you aren't a total creep! She'll fuck you and suck the male essence from your cock! WATCH OUT FOR THAT ONE"

I'd be keeping an eye out for her too.

Because I like easy sex. Why do you hate fun? [[User:DrShoggoth|Dr. Herodotus P. Shoggoth :Doktor of the Forbidden Sciences, Medallion Guardian, Imperial Emu, Emeritus of the Ancient and Justified Order of the Turtle]] 10:36, 18 January 2011 (PST)
==Re: "Fuzzy Door empire", Books for college, the “ObamaCable Box”& dorm-brothels==
There’s a huge difference: they get their work published and they get paid for it. Getting money for writing and vanity publishing with the hope that it will net you money isn't the same thing and I don’t think I’ve ever heard of someone making a consequential amount through the second way. Seriously, you’d be better off if you just took a govt grant and loans<small>(I know they happen to be your own [[Greene County Conspiracy| Green County]] and all but...)</small> for the sake of finishing school: the networking you’d get from dealing with the staff would in itself help you at publishing more than anything you’re currently doing.
And what, I really hope you don’t think college is supposed to be like that.-[[User:Kei|Kei]] 20:32, 18 January 2011 (PST)

== Hey ==

Hey you, you know, I've been keeping an eye on you. You and me should be friends, you know? We could go places you see. I'm at this forum, PVCC, we need moderators. I say it might be something for you, no? Contact me, or we could maybe talk on Skype. Delicioso, comprendre? [[User:RachmaninovDESU|RachmaninovDESU]] 16:07, 18 January 2011 (PST)
* Yeah, something like that, I also like how you're standing up against FreeCell's bullshit. We need some freedom in here. Hasta la victoria siempre, mi compadre. [[User:RachmaninovDESU|RachmaninovDESU]] 05:36, 19 January 2011 (PST)

==Ok let me explain this to you==

I'm literally inches away from banning you. Removing talk page messages is vandalism, even if it's on your own page, unless you have permission from the author. For 3 days I've reverted this same edit. Do it again and you're gone. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 00:10, 19 January 2011 (PST)

==Here's the Deal==

People are telling me that I'm correct in thinking that removing messages from your own talk page counts as something I can ban. I'm going to wait until Champthom is online so I can get his opinion, because he knows the rules better than probably anyone else. You might be unbanned or you might be permabanned, depending on what I hear from Champ. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 01:17, 19 January 2011 (PST)

== Hey hey hey ==

Just thought you might want to know you're getting [http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Iconoclast#Iconoclast_the_Liberal pretty famous] out there. Looks like you're one step closer to geting the exposure you wanted.-[[User:Kei|Kei]] 18:08, 23 February 2011 (PST)
* It'd be funny if their research wasn't so criminally sloppy and the whole article completely biased. What even qualifies me as a liberal? I hate change and work daily to defund and dial it back. Also, the Kim Possible jokes are getting old fast. For the record, it's the government's fault I can only watch children's shows on the weekend, with all the boneheaded E/I regulation. When I was a kid, I was a huge fan of womens' wrestling.

:'''[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JHblvQ4nz_s ''G.L.O.W.'': Col. Ninotchka vs. Little Feather and Ebony]'''

:What, not educational enough? Tell them that a half-naked Russian woman beating up a half-naked native American woman teaches multiculturalism, feminist studies, and history. The left is dumb enough to buy that, right? [[User:The Iconoclast|The Iconoclast]]
::Uh, if you're having problems with lackluster socialist television, you can always look into cable and satellite providers. You know, revel in the benefits of the free market. A lot of companies even include an introductory premium package for the first three months or so at no extra charge. You can get all the softcore porn you want on Cinemax. --[[User:Xanabit|Xanabit]] 16:10, 25 February 2011 (PST)
:I'm saving up for a new dish. I found I can watch some shows online, but I've missed a whole season of ''The Simpsons'' and ''Family Guy'' in the meantime. Also, I can't find last Monday's ep of ''Two and a Half Men'', or full eps of ''Shit My Dad Says'', at Hulu. TV has changed a lot since I was a kid, I'm just saying. You can't even find classic Warner Bros. and MGM cartoons on cable anymore--you have to go to YouTube, or spring for DVDs. Is a copy of "The Great Piggy Bank Robbery" worth that much bread just for an extras menu featuring unused storyboards and John K's 20-min sermon on the history of forties-era rubberhose? [[User:The Iconoclast|The Iconoclast]] 18:36, 25 February 2011 (PST)
::Is this really relevant to... anything? --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 23:19, 25 February 2011 (PST)

== JSM ==

I was comparing your initials to those of CWC and I noticed they spell out JSM. Is this conspiracy or coincidence? [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 14:23, 1 March 2011 (PST)

>> It's '''JMS'''. And your point being? [[User:The Iconoclast|The Iconoclast]] 15:52, 4 March 2011 (PST)

No it's jism rolf rolf rolf rolf HA but no. [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 18:27, 4 March 2011 (PST)

POST-SCRIPT:

"Research for my next book. I'm currently reading Vivian's treatment of Chris in "A Girl Who Brought Down the World", and I think autism is the way to go with my story's main character, compounded by an overprotective mother figure and a cruel prank by schoolyard trolls." --[[User:The Iconoclast|The Iconoclast]] 11:10, 15 January 2011 (PST)

Are you still planning on 'writing' this story? Holla back yo. [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 14:32, 1 March 2011 (PST)
:Do you have a manuscript, and may I see your synopsis? --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 14:40, 1 March 2011 (PST)
>>Originally the novel was a sort of ''Silas Marner'' homage about a hermit with a clubfoot who befriends a 10-year-old boy. An agent I showed the ms. to didn't like it; she didn't think a dentist (another character in the book) was a very interesting protagonist. I lost the ms., about 60,000 words, in a computer crash. I tried to make a go of recreating it, but saw it split into two stories--one about the boy, who was now a spunky female journalist, and the other about a deformed, insane loner living alone, unseen, in the basement of his old house, now occupied by renters. There's also a subplot about a guy-and-gal team of international spies who travel the globe fighting crime, with their pet oscelot. [[User:The Iconoclast|The Iconoclast]] 15:52, 4 March 2011 (PST)

lol [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 18:25, 4 March 2011 (PST)

::I'm pretty sure this is it here LOLOLOLOLOLOL:
http://www.sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler
Get it? It's a plagiarism joke. [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 15:41, 1 March 2011 (PST)

>>Not funny. Just stupid. [[User:The Iconoclast|The Iconoclast]] 15:52, 4 March 2011 (PST)

Actually its pretty funny roflroflrofl [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 18:25, 4 March 2011 (PST)
P.S. your Daria fanfiction is fucking atrocious. Peace and love [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 18:29, 4 March 2011 (PST)

User talk:The Iconoclast

2011-03-05T02:27:17Z

Baxter: /* JSM */

User talk:The Iconoclast

2011-03-05T02:25:57Z

Baxter: /* JSM */

{{protip|Anyone who harasses this user WILL get banned. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 16:10, 4 March 2011 (PST)}}

== Tips ==
Messages should go on the talk page, bro. I've already moved your post over there. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 23:14, 6 January 2011 (PST)

==We're a lot alike, you and me... ==
In what way are you not like Chris? Because you seem at least as pathetic as him. I guess plagiarists need to stick together, eh? [[User:DrShoggoth|Dr. Herodotus P. Shoggoth :Doktor of the Forbidden Sciences, Medallion Guardian, Imperial Emu, Emeritus of the Ancient and Justified Order of the Turtle]]
::Lets see: Widespread <s>plagiarism</s> artistic borrowing, a lack of artistic unity, a lack of professional quality in works that are presented as such <small>(hello vanity publishing/sonichu copyright)</small>, self promotion in unrelated places, and a superpowered SI surrounded by <s>boyfriend free girls</s> women to make up for an underwhelming real life... Yeah, it's like I'm reading Sonichu<small>©</small> light. We've even got the same regurgitation of tv lines. - [[User:Kei|Kei]] 12:14, 8 January 2011 (PST)
:::You're just another faggot who says "I'm better than Chris" to justify their existence while at the same time doing the same stupid bullshit (making comics NO ONE READS) at the same time. Go away. -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 11:56, 15 January 2011 (PST)

==i don't like you==
You're just another faggot who says "I'm better than the people who troll Chris who ARE EVIL PEOPLE so therefore I'm fucking awesome" to justify their existence while at the same time doing stupid bullshit (making comics almost 5 people read) at the same time. Go away. -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 01:50, 16 January 2011 (PST)

==sup son==
Your one of my least favourite members on this board. Your litteraly homosexual, your a furry, your a juggalo, you like fat women, you wanted to fuck your mother, you mother fucker, you like to take it up the ass and suck dick and u brag about it, and u think you are way funnier than you really are. [[User:Sully|Sully]] 11:03, 16 January 2011 (PST)

==Why do you hate America's children?==
Do you ''not'' want kids to eat food that actually has some sort of nutritional value? Are you '''IN FAVOR OF CHILDHOOD OBESITY'''? [[User:Massive Dynamic|Massive Dynamic]] 14:38, 16 January 2011 (PST)

'''I don't want Michelle Obama telling me what snacks I may consume'''

The bill only applies to public schools, which are federally funded. It's the federal government passing a law that affects a federal institution. Should they not be able to control something in their own organization? It won't affect what snacks get stuck in the beard you meticulously crafted using the Spray tool in MSPaint.

And children's programming was always stupid and full of fluff. Why are you watching kiddie shows at your age, anyway? [[User:Massive Dynamic|Massive Dynamic]] 11:24, 17 January 2011 (PST)

You still didn't answer my question about why you watch so many kids shows in the first place. The 80s stuff, I guess I can understand. It makes you nostalgic for the time when we didn't have ratings and when Z. Cavariccis were popular or whatever. But why, in your late 20s did you just suddenly get into Pokemon and Histeria? Or Kim Possible for that matter.

If you had to take care of your kids or nephew or younger siblings and that's what they watched, I could see you getting a little kick out of it. Or if you were a pothead, that's a valid excuse. Potheads eat and watch all kinds of things when they're bored and high. But you're a straitlaced arch-conservative mystery "writer" who doesn't have any kids and judging by your general demeanor and your Chris-Chanian dream of returning to college solely for the cable and the coochie, you won't have any. [[User:Massive Dynamic|Massive Dynamic]] 10:23, 18 January 2011 (PST)

P.S. Your shitty comic's self-insert protagonist looks like Arthur. Stop watching PBS, son.

==Get out of bed!==
''[walks into Icon's bedroom, making furnace noises through snuffle]'' f-f-f-f-f ''[in a normal voice]'' Get out of bed! Snuffle-uffle-snuffle-uffle-snuffle-uffle-snuffle-uffle... --[[User:Snuffleupagus|Snuffleupagus]] 06:41, 17 January 2011 (PST)

==Virginal Plagiarist==
He also steals ideas, and ain't never got no sex. He did meet a girl once, and she was creeped out by him. He's still stalking her.
[[User:DrShoggoth|Dr. Herodotus P. Shoggoth :Doktor of the Forbidden Sciences, Medallion Guardian, Imperial Emu, Emeritus of the Ancient and Justified Order of the Turtle]] 10:05, 17 January 2011 (PST)

== Nice Site-- NOT ==

McAfee found a virus the moment I opened your site in a new tab. Now I'm never reading your shit.--[[User:Trombonista|trombonista]] 16:20, 17 January 2011 (PST)

==College Relationships==
What's wrong with sluts? Just because you couldn't fuck a slut? What's you plan? "Hey guys! There's this slut running around, and she totally wants dick, and she's rela easy as long as you aren't a total creep! She'll fuck you and suck the male essence from your cock! WATCH OUT FOR THAT ONE"

I'd be keeping an eye out for her too.

Because I like easy sex. Why do you hate fun? [[User:DrShoggoth|Dr. Herodotus P. Shoggoth :Doktor of the Forbidden Sciences, Medallion Guardian, Imperial Emu, Emeritus of the Ancient and Justified Order of the Turtle]] 10:36, 18 January 2011 (PST)
==Re: "Fuzzy Door empire", Books for college, the “ObamaCable Box”& dorm-brothels==
There’s a huge difference: they get their work published and they get paid for it. Getting money for writing and vanity publishing with the hope that it will net you money isn't the same thing and I don’t think I’ve ever heard of someone making a consequential amount through the second way. Seriously, you’d be better off if you just took a govt grant and loans<small>(I know they happen to be your own [[Greene County Conspiracy| Green County]] and all but...)</small> for the sake of finishing school: the networking you’d get from dealing with the staff would in itself help you at publishing more than anything you’re currently doing.
And what, I really hope you don’t think college is supposed to be like that.-[[User:Kei|Kei]] 20:32, 18 January 2011 (PST)

== Hey ==

Hey you, you know, I've been keeping an eye on you. You and me should be friends, you know? We could go places you see. I'm at this forum, PVCC, we need moderators. I say it might be something for you, no? Contact me, or we could maybe talk on Skype. Delicioso, comprendre? [[User:RachmaninovDESU|RachmaninovDESU]] 16:07, 18 January 2011 (PST)
* Yeah, something like that, I also like how you're standing up against FreeCell's bullshit. We need some freedom in here. Hasta la victoria siempre, mi compadre. [[User:RachmaninovDESU|RachmaninovDESU]] 05:36, 19 January 2011 (PST)

==Ok let me explain this to you==

I'm literally inches away from banning you. Removing talk page messages is vandalism, even if it's on your own page, unless you have permission from the author. For 3 days I've reverted this same edit. Do it again and you're gone. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 00:10, 19 January 2011 (PST)

==Here's the Deal==

People are telling me that I'm correct in thinking that removing messages from your own talk page counts as something I can ban. I'm going to wait until Champthom is online so I can get his opinion, because he knows the rules better than probably anyone else. You might be unbanned or you might be permabanned, depending on what I hear from Champ. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 01:17, 19 January 2011 (PST)

== Hey hey hey ==

Just thought you might want to know you're getting [http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Iconoclast#Iconoclast_the_Liberal pretty famous] out there. Looks like you're one step closer to geting the exposure you wanted.-[[User:Kei|Kei]] 18:08, 23 February 2011 (PST)
* It'd be funny if their research wasn't so criminally sloppy and the whole article completely biased. What even qualifies me as a liberal? I hate change and work daily to defund and dial it back. Also, the Kim Possible jokes are getting old fast. For the record, it's the government's fault I can only watch children's shows on the weekend, with all the boneheaded E/I regulation. When I was a kid, I was a huge fan of womens' wrestling.

:'''[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JHblvQ4nz_s ''G.L.O.W.'': Col. Ninotchka vs. Little Feather and Ebony]'''

:What, not educational enough? Tell them that a half-naked Russian woman beating up a half-naked native American woman teaches multiculturalism, feminist studies, and history. The left is dumb enough to buy that, right? [[User:The Iconoclast|The Iconoclast]]
::Uh, if you're having problems with lackluster socialist television, you can always look into cable and satellite providers. You know, revel in the benefits of the free market. A lot of companies even include an introductory premium package for the first three months or so at no extra charge. You can get all the softcore porn you want on Cinemax. --[[User:Xanabit|Xanabit]] 16:10, 25 February 2011 (PST)
:I'm saving up for a new dish. I found I can watch some shows online, but I've missed a whole season of ''The Simpsons'' and ''Family Guy'' in the meantime. Also, I can't find last Monday's ep of ''Two and a Half Men'', or full eps of ''Shit My Dad Says'', at Hulu. TV has changed a lot since I was a kid, I'm just saying. You can't even find classic Warner Bros. and MGM cartoons on cable anymore--you have to go to YouTube, or spring for DVDs. Is a copy of "The Great Piggy Bank Robbery" worth that much bread just for an extras menu featuring unused storyboards and John K's 20-min sermon on the history of forties-era rubberhose? [[User:The Iconoclast|The Iconoclast]] 18:36, 25 February 2011 (PST)
::Is this really relevant to... anything? --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 23:19, 25 February 2011 (PST)

== JSM ==

I was comparing your initials to those of CWC and I noticed they spell out JSM. Is this conspiracy or coincidence? [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 14:23, 1 March 2011 (PST)

>> It's '''JMS'''. And your point being? [[User:The Iconoclast|The Iconoclast]] 15:52, 4 March 2011 (PST)

POST-SCRIPT:

"Research for my next book. I'm currently reading Vivian's treatment of Chris in "A Girl Who Brought Down the World", and I think autism is the way to go with my story's main character, compounded by an overprotective mother figure and a cruel prank by schoolyard trolls." --[[User:The Iconoclast|The Iconoclast]] 11:10, 15 January 2011 (PST)

Are you still planning on 'writing' this story? Holla back yo. [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 14:32, 1 March 2011 (PST)
:Do you have a manuscript, and may I see your synopsis? --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 14:40, 1 March 2011 (PST)
>>Originally the novel was a sort of ''Silas Marner'' homage about a hermit with a clubfoot who befriends a 10-year-old boy. An agent I showed the ms. to didn't like it; she didn't think a dentist (another character in the book) was a very interesting protagonist. I lost the ms., about 60,000 words, in a computer crash. I tried to make a go of recreating it, but saw it split into two stories--one about the boy, who was now a spunky female journalist, and the other about a deformed, insane loner living alone, unseen, in the basement of his old house, now occupied by renters. There's also a subplot about a guy-and-gal team of international spies who travel the globe fighting crime, with their pet oscelot. [[User:The Iconoclast|The Iconoclast]] 15:52, 4 March 2011 (PST)

lol [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 18:25, 4 March 2011 (PST)

::I'm pretty sure this is it here LOLOLOLOLOLOL:
http://www.sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler
Get it? It's a plagiarism joke. [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 15:41, 1 March 2011 (PST)

>>Not funny. Just stupid. [[User:The Iconoclast|The Iconoclast]] 15:52, 4 March 2011 (PST)

Actually its pretty funny roflroflrofl [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 18:25, 4 March 2011 (PST)

User:Baxter

2011-03-04T04:48:43Z

Baxter:

[[Image:THAT ONE'S ON THE HOUSE.gif]]<big><big><big>'''''B'''''</big></big></big>[[Image:THAT ONE'S ON THE HOUSE.gif]]<big><big><big>'''''A'''''</big></big></big>[[Image:THAT ONE'S ON THE HOUSE.gif]]<big><big><big>'''''X'''''</big></big></big>[[Image:THAT ONE'S ON THE HOUSE.gif]]<big><big><big>'''''T'''''</big></big></big>[[Image:THAT ONE'S ON THE HOUSE.gif]]<big><big><big>'''''E'''''</big></big></big>[[Image:THAT ONE'S ON THE HOUSE.gif]]<big><big><big>'''''R'''''</big></big></big>[[Image:THAT ONE'S ON THE HOUSE.gif]]

Shit I did for Chris:

[[Image:Magichan talking bollocks.png]]

[[Image:Don't do the drugs there.jpg]]

[[Image:Fanartmail7-uptowndude.jpg]]

[[Image:Emmy.jpg]]

[[Image:Moonpals at the prom.png]]

- Semiotics

[[Image:Realsimonladeath.jpg]]

[[Image:Dirty trick.jpg]]

[[Image:Page85withthefreshprince.jpg]]

[[Image:SonichuGothic.jpg]]

User talk:The Iconoclast

2011-03-01T23:41:24Z

Baxter: /* JSM */

== Tips ==
Messages should go on the talk page, bro. I've already moved your post over there. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 23:14, 6 January 2011 (PST)

==We're a lot alike, you and me... ==
In what way are you not like Chris? Because you seem at least as pathetic as him. I guess plagiarists need to stick together, eh? [[User:DrShoggoth|Dr. Herodotus P. Shoggoth :Doktor of the Forbidden Sciences, Medallion Guardian, Imperial Emu, Emeritus of the Ancient and Justified Order of the Turtle]]
::Lets see: Widespread <s>plagiarism</s> artistic borrowing, a lack of artistic unity, a lack of professional quality in works that are presented as such <small>(hello vanity publishing/sonichu copyright)</small>, self promotion in unrelated places, and a superpowered SI surrounded by <s>boyfriend free girls</s> women to make up for an underwhelming real life... Yeah, it's like I'm reading Sonichu<small>©</small> light. We've even got the same regurgitation of tv lines. - [[User:Kei|Kei]] 12:14, 8 January 2011 (PST)
:::You're just another faggot who says "I'm better than Chris" to justify their existence while at the same time doing the same stupid bullshit (making comics NO ONE READS) at the same time. Go away. -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 11:56, 15 January 2011 (PST)

==i don't like you==
You're just another faggot who says "I'm better than the people who troll Chris who ARE EVIL PEOPLE so therefore I'm fucking awesome" to justify their existence while at the same time doing stupid bullshit (making comics almost 5 people read) at the same time. Go away. -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 01:50, 16 January 2011 (PST)

==sup son==
Your one of my least favourite members on this board. Your litteraly homosexual, your a furry, your a juggalo, you like fat women, you wanted to fuck your mother, you mother fucker, you like to take it up the ass and suck dick and u brag about it, and u think you are way funnier than you really are. [[User:Sully|Sully]] 11:03, 16 January 2011 (PST)

==Why do you hate America's children?==
Do you ''not'' want kids to eat food that actually has some sort of nutritional value? Are you '''IN FAVOR OF CHILDHOOD OBESITY'''? [[User:Massive Dynamic|Massive Dynamic]] 14:38, 16 January 2011 (PST)

'''I don't want Michelle Obama telling me what snacks I may consume'''

The bill only applies to public schools, which are federally funded. It's the federal government passing a law that affects a federal institution. Should they not be able to control something in their own organization? It won't affect what snacks get stuck in the beard you meticulously crafted using the Spray tool in MSPaint.

And children's programming was always stupid and full of fluff. Why are you watching kiddie shows at your age, anyway? [[User:Massive Dynamic|Massive Dynamic]] 11:24, 17 January 2011 (PST)

You still didn't answer my question about why you watch so many kids shows in the first place. The 80s stuff, I guess I can understand. It makes you nostalgic for the time when we didn't have ratings and when Z. Cavariccis were popular or whatever. But why, in your late 20s did you just suddenly get into Pokemon and Histeria? Or Kim Possible for that matter.

If you had to take care of your kids or nephew or younger siblings and that's what they watched, I could see you getting a little kick out of it. Or if you were a pothead, that's a valid excuse. Potheads eat and watch all kinds of things when they're bored and high. But you're a straitlaced arch-conservative mystery "writer" who doesn't have any kids and judging by your general demeanor and your Chris-Chanian dream of returning to college solely for the cable and the coochie, you won't have any. [[User:Massive Dynamic|Massive Dynamic]] 10:23, 18 January 2011 (PST)

P.S. Your shitty comic's self-insert protagonist looks like Arthur. Stop watching PBS, son.

==Get out of bed!==
''[walks into Icon's bedroom, making furnace noises through snuffle]'' f-f-f-f-f ''[in a normal voice]'' Get out of bed! Snuffle-uffle-snuffle-uffle-snuffle-uffle-snuffle-uffle... --[[User:Snuffleupagus|Snuffleupagus]] 06:41, 17 January 2011 (PST)

==Virginal Plagiarist==
He also steals ideas, and ain't never got no sex. He did meet a girl once, and she was creeped out by him. He's still stalking her.
[[User:DrShoggoth|Dr. Herodotus P. Shoggoth :Doktor of the Forbidden Sciences, Medallion Guardian, Imperial Emu, Emeritus of the Ancient and Justified Order of the Turtle]] 10:05, 17 January 2011 (PST)

== Nice Site-- NOT ==

McAfee found a virus the moment I opened your site in a new tab. Now I'm never reading your shit.--[[User:Trombonista|trombonista]] 16:20, 17 January 2011 (PST)

==College Relationships==
What's wrong with sluts? Just because you couldn't fuck a slut? What's you plan? "Hey guys! There's this slut running around, and she totally wants dick, and she's rela easy as long as you aren't a total creep! She'll fuck you and suck the male essence from your cock! WATCH OUT FOR THAT ONE"

I'd be keeping an eye out for her too.

Because I like easy sex. Why do you hate fun? [[User:DrShoggoth|Dr. Herodotus P. Shoggoth :Doktor of the Forbidden Sciences, Medallion Guardian, Imperial Emu, Emeritus of the Ancient and Justified Order of the Turtle]] 10:36, 18 January 2011 (PST)
==Re: "Fuzzy Door empire", Books for college, the “ObamaCable Box”& dorm-brothels==
There’s a huge difference: they get their work published and they get paid for it. Getting money for writing and vanity publishing with the hope that it will net you money isn't the same thing and I don’t think I’ve ever heard of someone making a consequential amount through the second way. Seriously, you’d be better off if you just took a govt grant and loans<small>(I know they happen to be your own [[Greene County Conspiracy| Green County]] and all but...)</small> for the sake of finishing school: the networking you’d get from dealing with the staff would in itself help you at publishing more than anything you’re currently doing.
And what, I really hope you don’t think college is supposed to be like that.-[[User:Kei|Kei]] 20:32, 18 January 2011 (PST)

== Hey ==

Hey you, you know, I've been keeping an eye on you. You and me should be friends, you know? We could go places you see. I'm at this forum, PVCC, we need moderators. I say it might be something for you, no? Contact me, or we could maybe talk on Skype. Delicioso, comprendre? [[User:RachmaninovDESU|RachmaninovDESU]] 16:07, 18 January 2011 (PST)
* Yeah, something like that, I also like how you're standing up against FreeCell's bullshit. We need some freedom in here. Hasta la victoria siempre, mi compadre. [[User:RachmaninovDESU|RachmaninovDESU]] 05:36, 19 January 2011 (PST)

==Ok let me explain this to you==

I'm literally inches away from banning you. Removing talk page messages is vandalism, even if it's on your own page, unless you have permission from the author. For 3 days I've reverted this same edit. Do it again and you're gone. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 00:10, 19 January 2011 (PST)

==Here's the Deal==

People are telling me that I'm correct in thinking that removing messages from your own talk page counts as something I can ban. I'm going to wait until Champthom is online so I can get his opinion, because he knows the rules better than probably anyone else. You might be unbanned or you might be permabanned, depending on what I hear from Champ. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 01:17, 19 January 2011 (PST)

== Hey hey hey ==

Just thought you might want to know you're getting [http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Iconoclast#Iconoclast_the_Liberal pretty famous] out there. Looks like you're one step closer to geting the exposure you wanted.-[[User:Kei|Kei]] 18:08, 23 February 2011 (PST)
* It'd be funny if their research wasn't so criminally sloppy and the whole article completely biased. What even qualifies me as a liberal? I hate change and work daily to defund and dial it back. Also, the Kim Possible jokes are getting old fast. For the record, it's the government's fault I can only watch children's shows on the weekend, with all the boneheaded E/I regulation. When I was a kid, I was a huge fan of womens' wrestling.

:'''[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JHblvQ4nz_s ''G.L.O.W.'': Col. Ninotchka vs. Little Feather and Ebony]'''

:What, not educational enough? Tell them that a half-naked Russian woman beating up a half-naked native American woman teaches multiculturalism, feminist studies, and history. The left is dumb enough to buy that, right? [[User:The Iconoclast|The Iconoclast]]
::Uh, if you're having problems with lackluster socialist television, you can always look into cable and satellite providers. You know, revel in the benefits of the free market. A lot of companies even include an introductory premium package for the first three months or so at no extra charge. You can get all the softcore porn you want on Cinemax. --[[User:Xanabit|Xanabit]] 16:10, 25 February 2011 (PST)
:I'm saving up for a new dish. I found I can watch some shows online, but I've missed a whole season of ''The Simpsons'' and ''Family Guy'' in the meantime. Also, I can't find last Monday's ep of ''Two and a Half Men'', or full eps of ''Shit My Dad Says'', at Hulu. TV has changed a lot since I was a kid, I'm just saying. You can't even find classic Warner Bros. and MGM cartoons on cable anymore--you have to go to YouTube, or spring for DVDs. Is a copy of "The Great Piggy Bank Robbery" worth that much bread just for an extras menu featuring unused storyboards and John K's 20-min sermon on the history of forties-era rubberhose? [[User:The Iconoclast|The Iconoclast]] 18:36, 25 February 2011 (PST)
::Is this really relevant to... anything? --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 23:19, 25 February 2011 (PST)

== JSM ==

I was comparing your initials to those of CWC and I noticed they spell out JSM. Is this conspiracy or coincidence? [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 14:23, 1 March 2011 (PST)

POST-SCRIPT:

"Research for my next book. I'm currently reading Vivian's treatment of Chris in "A Girl Who Brought Down the World", and I think autism is the way to go with my story's main character, compounded by an overprotective mother figure and a cruel prank by schoolyard trolls." --[[User:The Iconoclast|The Iconoclast]] 11:10, 15 January 2011 (PST)

Are you still planning on 'writing' this story? Holla back yo. [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 14:32, 1 March 2011 (PST)

:Do you have a manuscript, and may I see your synopsis? --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 14:40, 1 March 2011 (PST)

::I'm pretty sure this is it here LOLOLOLOLOLOL:
http://www.sonichu.com/cwcki/Christian_Weston_Chandler
Get it? It's a plagiarism joke. [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 15:41, 1 March 2011 (PST)

User talk:The Iconoclast

2011-03-01T22:32:38Z

Baxter: /* JSM */

User talk:The Iconoclast

2011-03-01T22:23:42Z

Baxter: /* Hey hey hey */

Christian Love Day (video)

2011-02-26T21:23:16Z

Baxter: quoting a line from a poem is not the same as "ripping it off".

"'''Christian Love Day'''" is a video uploaded on 23 [[February 2010]] to commemorate [[Christian]]'s [[Chris and his Ego|self-created holiday]], which just happens to fall on his birthday. It should be noted that his speech is [[Things Chris has ripped off|copied]] from the science-fiction movie ''[[wikipedia:Independence Day (film)|Independence Day]]''.

When this video was first uploaded to YouTube, many people noticed that someone else is is holding the camera. This would become more clear when Chris revealed the [[Magical Man Potion|personal change]] he alludes to here, in which we meet the [[Magical Man|visitor]] who apparently brought his own camera with him to Chris's house. The quality of the footage in this video is decidedly clear, perhaps the clearest we've ever seen Chris, as his mysterious guest owned a better camera.

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Christian Love Day
| video = {{#ev:youtube|CMR1gT5eMMQ}}
| Stardate = 23 February 2010
| Maker = Chris
| Subject Matter = {{Sex|text}}, Birthday
| Performance Style = {{Crazy|text}}
| Saga = N/A
| Shirt = {{RedBlueShirt|text}}
| previous = [[9 February 2010]]
| next = [[Magical Man Potion]]
}} </center>

{{quote|Today we celebrate our CHRISTIAN LOVE DAY!"}}

===Transcript===
[[File:UlteriorMotives.jpg|thumb|right|We here at CWCki transcribed this as "and we will once again be saluting an image of our freedom". Google's giant computer brain reveals the true meaning of those poignant words.]]

''[pause]'' Good morning. In less than an hour, [[Sonichu]] [[fans]] from here will join others from around the world as you will be witnessing the [[Magical Man Potion|largest personal change]] in the history of mankind. Mankind...that word should have new meaning for us all today. We cannot be consumed by our petty differences anymore. We will be united in our common interests. Perhaps it is fate that today is [[Wikipedia:Flag Day in Mexico|Metsico's flllag day]]. And we will once again be saluting an image of our freedom. Not just from [[trolling]], loneliness, or persecution, but also from heartbreak. We are fighting for our right to love, to be honest, and when the sun sets today, the twenty-fourth of February will no longer be known as only a Metsican holiday, but as today Sonichu fans declared in one vwoice, "We will not go quietly into the night! We will not vanish without a fight! We are going to live on! We are going to survive, to celebr--today we celebrate our CHRISTIAN LOVE DAY!"
{{clear}}

== Fan videos ==
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Independence Gay
| video = {{#ev:youtube|vH5CbMyio9U}}
| Stardate = 25 February 2010
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/IBAClydeCash IBAClydeCash]
| Subject =
| Video Type = Remix
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Happy Christian Love Day!
| video = {{#ev:youtube|2G677ZGxu5U}}
| Stardate = February 18, 2011
| Maker = TheHunterOfTrolls
| Subject =
| Video Type = Tribute
}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[9 February 2010]]|nextlink=[[Magical Man Potion]]|}}

{{videos}}

[[Category: Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

[[Category: Chris-chan videos, February 2010| 2010-02-23]]

User:Clydec

2011-02-11T03:32:24Z

Baxter: /* Q AND A HERE */

== I AM GOING TO OVERTHROW YOU CHAMP ==
AND KILL YOU -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 18:13, 15 January 2011 (PST)
* AND RAPE YOU -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 23:48, 4 February 2011 (PST)
** AND MOLEST YOU -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 17:32, 5 February 2011 (PST)
*** YOU CAN DO ALL THAT BUT YOU CAN'T WORK ON RABBICHOSO -- [[User:Jerk|Jerk]] 17:45, 5 February 2011 (PST)
**** DAMN IT JERK -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 17:47, 5 February 2011 (PST)
Rabbichoso sucks.--[[User:Delabonte|Delabonte]] 02:34, 6 February 2011 (PST)

== CWCki Improvement Team ==
The objective is to make the CWCki less gay.
Members:
*Delabonte

If you feel like you qualify, please put your name here:

* [[User:Ronichu]] - No idea what this is but it sounds good. Gimme a list of shit to do and I'll do it. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 14:42, 8 February 2011 (PST)
** Go through every article and delete stupid shit. Bad jokes. Stupid jokes. Retarded memes. Speculation. The works. -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 15:23, 8 February 2011 (PST)
* Well, I've already gone through and changed references of Chris's misogyny to chauvanism, since Chris is more of a chauvanist than he is a misogynist, so I'm game to play janitor on here. [[User:John Ritter's Nutsack|John Ritter's Nutsack]] 15:00, 10 February 2011 (PST)

== Q AND A HERE ==
start here:

Why do you not return my calls?[[User:SurfShackTito|SurfShackTito]] 15:00, 9 February 2011 (PST)
*because i have caller id -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 15:02, 9 February 2011 (PST)

Do you regret/wish you hadn't done something during your time trolling Chris? [[User:PerilousSquall|PerilousSquall]] 18:43, 9 February 2011 (PST)
* i dunno -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 18:48, 9 February 2011 (PST)

How does it feel to be responsible for the drought according to legi0n?[[User:SurfShackTito|SurfShackTito]] 18:50, 9 February 2011 (PST)
* yeah i know. i totally caused it. feels good man -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]]

I read somewhere on ED that you're involved in at least one other trolling scheme. How does the manchild compare to trolling other lulcows? [[User:Isarko|Isarko]] 19:15, 9 February 2011 (PST)
* chris is dead. people need to learn to move on. chris was just something a bit bigger and probably got out of hand imo -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 11:19, 10 February 2011 (PST)

Is it difficult balancing trolling with fighting for freedom in China? --[[User:Delabonte|Delabonte]] 20:35, 9 February 2011 (PST)
*I think someone's been listening to Guns n' Roses "Chinese Democracy" album. --[[User:Chris_Pickles|Chris_Pickles]] 02:11, 10, February 2011 (EST)
** this is how i fight for freedom. once i expose american failures to the public, i will destroy america's status as superpower. duh -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 11:19, 10 February 2011 (PST)

Hey Clyde. I've always been curious, what is your favorite video game(s), and favorite video game console(s)? --[[Chris_Pickles|Chris_Pickles]] 01:19, 10 February 2011 (EST)
* super mario galaxy 2 goty all years -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 11:19, 10 February 2011 (PST)

When traveling at a subsonic speed during the last one hour of hyper sleep, which vector of the Romulan Nebula will suffer the wrath of the impenetrable quickening and how many wraths to the nearest molton? [[User:SurfShackTito|SurfShackTito]] 01:35, 10 February 2011 (PST)
* 7 -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 11:19, 10 February 2011 (PST)

If you could go back in time and change one major historical event, what would it be and why? --[[User:EdtheHedgehog1894|EdtheHedgehog1894]] 08:01, 10 February 2011 (PST)
* hitler's suicide. he had a lot more to accomplish. -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 11:19, 10 February 2011 (PST)

Question from Ivy: "I am taller than you. Will you go back to China and do the taller surgery thing to be taller than me someday?" --[[User:Jerk|Jerk]] 12:32, 10 February 2011 (PST)
* "PS- Even in Heaven, I am taller than you." --[[User:Jerk|Jerk]] 12:36, 10 February 2011 (PST)
** fuck you -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 14:04, 10 February 2011 (PST)

Where did you very first discover Chris? Was it on /v/ or /b/? Also, what was the first move you made to troll Chris? I know Medic takes alot of the credit for the early days of CWC trolling, did he really have a big effect or was most of it handed to him? [[User:Nigroid|Nigroid]] 17:25, 10 February 2011 (PST)

What is love? [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 19:32, 10 February 2011 (PST)

CWCki talk:Inside the Pickle Suit

2011-02-09T19:00:13Z

Baxter:

==Candidates for Future Interviews==
Debate future candidates for interviews and vote for them here. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 16:37, 3 February 2011 (PST)

:How about [[Reggie Fils-Aimé]]? We know Clyde posed as Miyamoto at the time, but Reggie's role has never really been explained beyond the e-mail records. [[User:Dethchemist77|Dethchemist77]] 17:51, 3 February 2011 (PST)

:I would to see [[Pandahalo]] interviewed. Chris was still obsessed with her as recent as August of last year.--[[User:Sack Thaddic|Sack Thaddic]] 18:52, 3 February 2011 (PST)

:What about [[Kacey]]? She actually met in him in real life but there's no information about that on her page. -[[User:Acousticvirgin|Acousticvirgin]] 21:39, 3 February 2011 (PST)

::*Not to shoot down ideas but PandaHalo is probably out of the question as she's sorta disappeared from the trolling scene, and Kacey wants nothing to do with trolling nowadays. But keep them coming.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 09:48, 4 February 2011 (PST)
:I like the idea of asking Emily some questions, or maybe try and find someone from Chris's past to see how he was BEFORE the trolls came into his life... like Megan (though she herself is probably out of the question considering their past... but someone like her from Chris's past). --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 11:44, 4 February 2011 (PST)
::Lucas and Mimms? I've heard that they still keep in touch with PVCC, though I doubt they have anything else to add.--[[User:Nhocgreen|Nhocgreen]] 21:04, 4 February 2011 (PST)
:::There's already a [[Mimms and Lucas Q&A]], is there really that much more we can learn from them? [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 11:00, 9 February 2011 (PST)
:[[Alec Benson Leary]] would be a good one. Setting Asperchu aside, I think it'd be interesting to hear about what it's like trying to maintain a dialogue with Chris for up to an hour. Same goes for [[Jackie]], only with e-mail. Obviously, Jackie could get Chris's attention by being a girl, but it was still impressive how she managed to keep him going for as long as she did.--[[User:Dethchemist77|Dethchemist77]] 16:56, 4 February 2011 (PST)
* I also say Jackie (and Lars) since they're the most recent and she got him to make some bizarre videos--[[User:CaseHa|CaseHa]] 17:14, 5 February 2011 (PST)

:Would Vivian Gee be available?--[[User:Nhocgreen|Nhocgreen]] 21:04, 4 February 2011 (PST)

I vote Bluespike [[User:BSD|BSD]] 22:56, 4 February 2011 (PST)
Seconded for Bluespike--[[User:Wintermute|Wintermute]] 12:52, 5 February 2011 (PST)
*But BlueSpike's always on IRC anyway. Just ask him there. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 13:59, 5 February 2011 (PST)

:I vote for Emily. Out of all of the trolls, Emily comes off as the most enigmatic to me and thus, would be interesting to get some more information on her time in the trolling foxholes. [[User:John Ritter's Nutsack|John Ritter's Nutsack]] 16:00, 5 February 2011 (PST)

I vote for Bluespike since there are a few questions I would like to ask him. [[User:Lucida|Lucida]] 16:15, 7 February 2011 (PST)

Fuck doing Emily, I doubt she has much to say we don't already know. I don't think she'd be interesting to do a Q&A with at all. Pretty much all she did was meet up with Chris at the mall, and we have all the audio from that and her descriptions of what were happening at the time.

That said, I vote for Clyde, but I know he won't fucking do it. He's the only one out of the rest of the candidates besides Ivy that I really want to hear from. I guess a more realistic vote would be for Bluespike, but really I don't think any of them besides Clyde would have very interesting answers. The appeal of Ivy is that all the trolling she did was not really documented in meticulous detail as was with the rest of these people. Clyde has been at it since the beginning, that's the only reason I'd want him to participate. Otherwise, I don't really think there is a whole lot to ask the others. I think the Ivy Q&A will clear up a lot, but we pretty much know EVERYTHING about the rest of these trolls. [[User:Nigroid|Nigroid]] 00:37, 8 February 2011 (PST)

I cast my vote for [[Robert Simmons V]], or [[Joshua Martinez]]. They have real life testimony, and the only people who trolled him who actually had a somewhat positive view of him at one point. [[User:Jeremyorkin|Jeremyorkin]] 15:00, 8 Febuary 2011 (PST)

I'd also like to submit a vote for [[The Man in the Pickle Suit]]. It was posted on /cwc/ the other day that The Man in Pickle Suit is in fact a former user from #sonichu called podmonkey, (CWCPodMonkey on YouTube), and that he is in fact the [[Magical Man]] in the Magical Man Potion, Rollin' and Trollin', and PS3 Tutorial videos. I'd like to ask him if that is true, and I'd like to see the relevant changes made to the CWCki if so. [[User:Nigroid|Nigroid]] 18:28, 8 February 2011 (PST)

== Format ==
Just curious, would people prefer audio or text? Some trolls will opt for text but in cases where audio is possible, would you want it? There's the work involved in transcribing but I wonder if people will consider them more authentic. Thoughts?--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 17:03, 3 February 2011 (PST)

:I prefer audio. Text is one thing, but with audio you can actually hear some of the emotions involved, which makes the interview a little more interesting and, sometimes, even a little funnier. [[User:John Ritter's Nutsack|John Ritter's Nutsack]] 16:02, 5 February 2011 (PST)

I'd love to have the questions answered in an audio and/or video format, even if Ivy didn't show her face. But I know she didn't want herself out there in regards to Chris, so it's understandable if she wants it in a simply text format. [[User:Nigroid|Nigroid]] 20:26, 7 February 2011 (PST)

== The validity of all this (or: Incharacter/Out of character) ==

This is something I really should have thought of before starting this, but I'll bring it up here and see what you all think.

Currently, for the most part and with few tiny exceptions, things on the CWCki are from Chris's point of view. As it's been said elsewhere, this wouldn't be a very interesting wiki as it would be a wiki about basement dwellers who troll Chris if we were to go with the "true" story. Thus, we tend to go with how Chris saw the events.

There is a problem with that, namely that I've seen complaints that this confuses people who aren't sure if these people are real or trolls and more or less doesn't explain what's going on to a new person well. However, being in character helps absolve any sort of liability and responsibility as we're just reporting things as Chris has described them to us through his correspondences, media, etc.

So should we even have these interviews? If so, how should we handle them? I think that any reasonably intelligent person should realize that nothing with Chris is genuine and that it might help to explain their motives and such but at the same time sorta ruins the magic and mystique behind them.

So what do you all think? Thoughts?--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 18:59, 4 February 2011 (PST)

i think this idea is fucking stupid and seriously who gives a shit. honestly, only fucking people who grasp onto this whole troll persona bullshit give a shit. if you're trying to bring life into the cwcki, stop because there will never be more life into it unless we actually fix the articles we have instead of adding more fucking bullshit on top of this. besides, this goes against all this whole CITATION NEEDED bullshit if we're going to ask people about retarded nonsense because i could say anything and fuckers would grasp onto that and take it as word of god. also bluespike is a little scamp -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 23:45, 4 February 2011 (PST)

:I don't hold much say at all, but personally I agree with Clyde, at least on some points. We're really very stingy with citations, and it helps so we don't make up shit, or take some random troll conversations as 'canon'. But pulling in the trolls sort of breaks that, because they could say anything they wanted, and it would be considered canon just because there's no evidence to disprove it. It's an interesting idea, but we have to consider what this means for the CWCki. If this falls through, maybe we should show a marker or something for troll words, something to keep in mind, but not fully accept due to its subjective nature? I don't think in-character shit will be a problem, Ivy could be Edarem for all we know, but as long as he's Ivy on the CWCki, and in this interview, it's all good.

Plus, fixing some articles would be good. I should really get on with helping out. [[User:PerilousSquall|PerilousSquall]] 11:33, 7 February 2011 (PST)

I think this is an awesome idea and I really hope you guys go through with it and continue after Ivy. This is just the opinion of an outsider who has followed Chris since '07 when the /v/ threads first started. And from what I see on /cwc/ this is the opinion of most of the people on the outside looking in on the sagas of CWC. I know people like Clyde and I'm sure others at the PVCC could give a fuck less, but I and many others find the "behind-the-scenes" stories as it were to be quite interesting and intriguing. I know you guys have a certain format for the CWCki, so I think this is the perfect forum to answer questions people still have about the various sagas and the trolls who made them happen. It's all old news for you guys in the know, but not so for the rest of us. [[User:Nigroid|Nigroid]] 20:31, 7 February 2011 (PST)

CWCki:Inside the Pickle Suit

2011-02-09T18:57:33Z

Baxter:

'''Inside the Pickle Suit''' is an ongoing [[CWCki]] project where CWCki users can ask trolls involved with Chris their side of the story in a series of interviews in order to gain information to improve CWCki articles.

The first interview will be with '''Ivy's ghost''', scheduled for 11 February 2011.

==Candidates for Future Interviews==
Difficulty - must be trolls (no [[Megan]], [[The Wallflower]], etc.).

'''Vote for next interview on the [[CWCki talk:Inside the Pickle Suit|talk page]] by 10 February 2011.'''

Some possibilities (not inclusive):

*[[BlueSpike]]/Julie
*[[The Man in the Pickle Suit]]
*[[Emily]]
*[[Jack Thaddeus]]
*[[Clyde Cash]]

==Rules of Engagement==
*No stupid questions (i.e. "What's your REAL name?," "Where do you REALLY live?").
*Read the relevant articles first before asking.

==Questions==
Ask your questions here. Be sure to [[Help:A_Quick_Guide_to_CWCki#Sign_your_comments|sign your question]] so we know who asked it.

'''Questions for Ivy are due 10 February 2011'''

Assuming that you weren't forced to abort, what was your original plan for ending the saga? Did you have anything special planned for the breakup?--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 17:18, 3 February 2011 (PST)
* Also how did you get Chris to watch End of Evangelion and did he have any prior exposure to the series?--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 19:42, 3 February 2011 (PST)

How much contact did you have with Chris? Also, were you ever actually planning on meeting Chris like he mentions in [[For_My_Sweetest_Ivy|this]] video?--[[User:Sack Thaddic|Sack Thaddic]] 18:15, 3 February 2011 (PST)

How much input did you have into the content Chris produced during the saga? Were the Wedding/Honeymoon Comics based on your suggestions, or did Chris come up with it on his own?--[[User:Dethchemist77|Dethchemist77]] 18:27, 3 February 2011 (PST)

After the saga ended, Chris seemed uncertain about whether you were a really a troll or not. Have you ever considered re-establishing contact with him?--[[User:Dethchemist77|Dethchemist77]] 21:19, 3 February 2011 (PST)

:Doesn't Chris think Ivy died? [[User:Eamoo|Eamoo]] 11:51, 4 February 2011 (PST)

::He thought PandaHalo died earlier in the year; that didn't stop him from e-mailing her once she resurfaced. Not saying it's a good idea for Ivy to do the same, I'm just wondering if Ivy ever thought about it.--[[User:Dethchemist77|Dethchemist77]] 16:39, 4 February 2011 (PST)
:*Of course Ivy's dead, that's why we're getting an interview with her ''ghost''. But that does bring about a bigger issue, which I'll discuss in a separate section.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 18:50, 4 February 2011 (PST)

Opinions regarding how Chris became the way he is vary from assigning him over nine thousand different mental diseases and disorders, to crediting his 'perfect storm' of behavioral issues to simply shitty parenting of an autistic kid. As one of his more dedicated trolls, what are your thoughts? --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 13:43, 4 February 2011 (PST)

Most of the trolling aside from BlueSpike's efforts seems designed with the ultimate goal of helping Chris (eg "Get a job" is a requirement of practically all sweethearts). Do you believe this has had any effect? Can they? Following on from that, do you support BlueSpike style trolling, aka purposely inflicting as much harm on Chris as possible with no 'goal'? --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 13:43, 4 February 2011 (PST)
:That's not really "bluespike". That was really just how blue ended it. People always gloss over all the other stuff that blue got us, most notably the "bob walks in" audio. [[User:Canine|Canine]] 17:43, 4 February 2011 (PST)
Is it true that one time when Chris called you, one of your parents (or someone pretended to be your parent) picked up the phone and told Chris off for calling all the time and so damn early in the morning? --[[User:Nhocgreen|Nhocgreen]] 20:49, 4 February 2011 (PST)

Did you ever save any of the chatlogs/phone calls ect with Chris or are they lost in the Time Void forever? [[User:BSD|BSD]] 23:02, 4 February 2011 (PST)

this idea is fucking retarding i opt out. fuck you champ. -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 23:42, 4 February 2011 (PST)
* edit sorry, was out celebrating chinese new years i meant to say fucking retarded. -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 23:42, 4 February 2011 (PST)

::This from the same guy (or guys behind the fursona), masthead apparant of the PVCC (to which the very same USI and truly stalkerish appearance is also rightfully attributed) who had waited until things are already in a frenzy about Chris and not having everything to do with him (Jackie crap) then started giving scraps of withheld chatlogs and things that aren't even interesting and only may have been in the first place (Bluespike Skype logs, almost useless with just chattext, ect.) and made sure he got in on the CWCki "Chris And..." spergfest of the time by meaninglessly making "Television" into "Chris and Television," just to draw attention to himself and try to drive home that he is a EPIN TROL GODTEIR liek NOONE ELSEEEE, and now flips his fucking shit when there's the chance he might not get to uphold the mystique of the character and his personal army or whatever if he deigns to volunteer answers to some simple questions about what he did, why and how and if those who he considers are at his beck and call answer question that don't need to have anything to do with him. why don't you quit being such a faggot and just answer questions that people who have followed your trolling of chris for years want to know? [[User:12345|12345]] 20:03, 7 February 2011 (PST)

Was there a point were trolling Chris stopped being fun and became a chore? As in, because he kept calling, you felt you HAD to talk to him and you HAD to keep dealing with him? A follow up question: was it your idea to end it or and outside source? -- [[User:TheMAN|TheMAN]] 03:03, 5 February 2011 (PST)

The say that a madman falling in love with you is a scarier situation than a madman wanting to kill you. Were you frightened or disturbed by any of your contacts with Chris? Or if not, were you merely amused by his bizarre methods of showing affection? --[[User:DJChaos|DJChaos]] 15:22, 5 February 2011 (PST)

Outside of what's been documented, are there any funny Chris stories you can share with us? [[User:John Ritter's Nutsack|John Ritter's Nutsack]] 15:57, 5 February 2011 (PST)

When Rocky decided to call the police, did you have any conversations with her at all? Obviously the background check on you came up with nothing, but did you have any problems at all with Rocky's meddling? - [[User:Machop|Machop]] 16:57, 5 February 2011 (PST)

This one's kinda stupid, but i am a little curious. When Chris made the wedding comic the dress was ripped off from November Rain. Since Chris only listens to video game music or songs from guitar hero, chances are he never heard of that song or seen that video. Did you ever mention that you liked guns and roses/November rain, or is that some of his random accessness? --[[User:CaseHa|CaseHa]] 17:10, 5 February 2011 (PST)

If you had one more time to troll Chris before you died, what else would you have done to the manchild? --[[User:PedoforkBait|PedoforkBait]] 18:06, 5 February 2010 (PST)

How come nobody but you guys have been able to contact Chris? Do you guys monitor his e-mail and other messages before he gets them? --[[User:Dankechu|Dankechu]] 07:24, 6 February 2011 (PST)
:What do you mean? People contact Chris all the time. He just doesn't respond. His phone number is everywhere. Also, he doesn't have a computer anymore and I seriously doubt he checks his email too frequently. [[User:Canine|Canine]] 12:24, 6 February 2011 (PST)
::It just seems a little odd to me that you guys have had dibs on the fat manchild for all these years now. Certainly Chrissy talks to other people as well? I don't care how lazy he is, there should also be other lottery winners from his e-mail box.... since 2007. --[[User:Dankechu|Dankechu]] 14:48, 6 February 2011 (PST)
:::Who used email to communicate with him? The only major person I can think of who used email was Jackie and she contacted him from outside of email first. Anyone I'm missing? [[User:Canine|Canine]] 15:13, 6 February 2011 (PST)
::::You wanna be that way, fine, whatever. But I still think you guys checked his email and other shit to keep tabs on him. --[[User:Dankechu|Dankechu]] 15:52, 6 February 2011 (PST)
:::::I think it's pretty much a given that they did or still do have access to his email, despite claims otherwise. Also on /cwc/ recently Tito intercepted a white knighting attempt left in Chris' cellphone voicemail by a /cwc/ user, and they prank called this guy back. Tito posted what the contents were of the message, since the guy claimed he called to troll Chris and Tito revealed it was actually a white knight attempt. That tells you they also have access to his voicemail inbox. [[User:Nigroid|Nigroid]] 14:30, 7 February 2011 (PST)
::::::I think it's more likely that the number the white knight texted was fake or something. I doubt anyone's doing anything illegal here. Nobody's that stupid. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 14:39, 7 February 2011 (PST)
:::::::Could be. Would it actually be illegal if you just figured out somebodies voicemail password or it was willingly given though? Anyway, it doesn't really matter and I don't care either way, so that's all I have to say on the matter. Looking forward to this though, I'm glad you guys decided to do it. [[User:Nigroid|Nigroid]] 15:08, 7 February 2011 (PST)
::::::It doesn't necessarily mean that someone is in his voicemail. Chris could've told someone about it. Like that's how [[User:Miela|miela]] was caught. Chris told Jackie about her. Also we run into a lot of dumb white knights when people message accounts like the CWCville library. People think they're talking to Chris and drop their info. I don't remember what happened with the person on /cwc/, but I don't think access to Chris' voicemail was necessary. [[User:Canine|Canine]] 16:09, 7 February 2011 (PST)
:::::::This happened like last month, which was awhile after Chris left the internet. This guy left a message in Chris' voicemail, then posted audio of a message he got back that was someone impersonating Chris. Tito then showed up and said it wasn't the real Chris and that he'd had someone make that call, and that this guy actually left a white knight message on Chris' phone, not a trolling message as he claimed. There was no way he told anyone about it since he'd already ragequit again. Seems pretty clear he had access to the voicemail. [[User:Nigroid|Nigroid]] 00:27, 8 February 2011 (PST)
::::::::People had brought up the "Chris told someone" theory back in that cwc thread too, and Tito pretty much confirmed that PVCC still had contact with Chris, possibly through Samantha.--[[User:Nhocgreen|Nhocgreen]] 20:59, 8 February 2011 (PST)

Probably a stupid question but have you ever talked to Barb or Bob on the phone? If so, How did it go?
--[[User:Lucida|Lucida]] 7:41, 6 February 2011 (PST)

How did you find out about Chris stealing his parent's credit cards for his PSN account?
--[[User:Lucida|Lucida]] 7:52, 6 February 2011 (PST)

When you started your trolling endeavor did you ever realize how horrifyingly obsessed Chris would become with you? Also, given how chilling it is for people to watch the videos he made for you, what was your reaction to it all? Was it scary, hilarious, or an odd mixture of the two?
[[User:OsirisLord|OsirisLord]] 00:21, 7 February 2011 (PST)

Kind of piggybacking on another user's question: If you had had the chance to meet Chris in person, how do you think the event would have progressed? Would you have attempted to follow Chris's itinerary to a certain point before suggesting different activities, ride it the whole way through, or completely hijack it? Also, judging how the date with Emily (and any other female) went, it seems that Chris's ultimate goal in meeting up with a woman is to kiss and/or bed her. Would you have been prepared for his advances? Would you have brought along a chaperon/bodyguard, or did you believe that Chris was actually pretty harmless and that you could easily deflect his moves?
-- [[User:Elliecoral|Elliecoral]] 17:08 7 February 2011 (EST) [minor edit for grammar]

Ivy, I am curious. What was your reaction to the creeptacular videos Chris made for you, particularly "Message for Ivy" and "For my Sweetest Ivy"? Did you start to second guess your decision to help troll Chris? What was your reaction to "For my Sweetest Ivy" getting played on the radio? It seems Chris has arguably made some of his creepiest and disturbing videos during your saga, and was totally enamored with you. Was there anything different you were doing in your trolling of Chris over the phone, as he seemed to be obsessed with your more than any other "sweetheart" of any saga before or since. I only ask this since we don't have your phone calls to hear for ourselves, so I'm curious if you did anything unique to get Chris so wrapped up in you? [[User:Nigroid|Nigroid]] 14:26, 7 February 2011 (PST)

Ivy's Ghost, what was it about what you did that seemed to influence Chris to draw comic and also bring the crazy out of him? Also, you seem to have been the last sweetheart to use a fursona/sonic recolor sidekicks. Would you recommend future sweethearts to do the same? [[User:Barachulove|Barachulove]] 20:23, 7 February 2011 (PST)

Ivy, I guess this question has to do with meeting Chris, but how badly did Chris want to meet you in real life? And did Chris have any intentions of getting married with you(because of his daughter Crystal), or possibly getting a place together(If it went that far in Chris's mind)? Or did Chris just want you inside of his filthy home and having degrading "hanky-panky" in the garbage heaps of his house(because nothing says romance like rolling around in some garbage with an overweight man-child)? [[Chris_Pickles|Chris_Pickles]] 4:20, 8 February 2011 (EST)

:He did [[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"|propose]] to her, you know. Also piggybacking on Chris_Pickles' question, how did you feel about the marriage proposal? Did you tell him how crazy it was?--[[User:Nhocgreen|Nhocgreen]] 20:59, 8 February 2011 (PST)

Any relation to Poison Ivy? [[User:TheIronFjord|TheIronFjord]] 10:29, 8 February 2011 (EST)

This is an odd one, but was there, at any time, a moment when you felt a morsel of pity and/or (misguided) affection for Chris, or believed that he could be changed? (Granted, we mostly despise Chris, but there are a few times when some of us feel sorry for him and wish he could improve himself.) Do you believe Chris can redeem himself and become a somewhat functioning member of society, or is he a lost cause? For that matter, did you consider white knighting? -- [[User:Elliecoral|Elliecoral]] 18:11, 8 February 2011 (EST)

Your saga produced some of the most bizzare behavior from Chris. While he certainly did some weird stuff before you came along, his videos for you contained some of the most disturbing behavior he has ever shown. Among Chris's sweethearts, what made you so unique that you were able to get such strangeness out of him? Did you approach him differently? [[User:Farm Zombie|Farm Zombie]] 01:08, 9 February 2011 (PST)
[[Category:CWCki projects]]

Did you ever contact Chris through any other persona, ie via the mailbags? Also, what exactly prompted Chris to become so enamoured of you so quickly - in other words, how did you first approach him and what did you do or say which led him to produce [[CWC's Message for Ivy]]? [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 10:56, 9 February 2011 (PST)

CWCki:Inside the Pickle Suit

2011-02-09T18:56:53Z

Baxter:

'''Inside the Pickle Suit''' is an ongoing [[CWCki]] project where CWCki users can ask trolls involved with Chris their side of the story in a series of interviews in order to gain information to improve CWCki articles.

The first interview will be with '''Ivy's ghost''', scheduled for 11 February 2011.

==Candidates for Future Interviews==
Difficulty - must be trolls (no [[Megan]], [[The Wallflower]], etc.).

'''Vote for next interview on the [[CWCki talk:Inside the Pickle Suit|talk page]] by 10 February 2011.'''

Some possibilities (not inclusive):

*[[BlueSpike]]/Julie
*[[The Man in the Pickle Suit]]
*[[Emily]]
*[[Jack Thaddeus]]
*[[Clyde Cash]]

==Rules of Engagement==
*No stupid questions (i.e. "What's your REAL name?," "Where do you REALLY live?").
*Read the relevant articles first before asking.

==Questions==
Ask your questions here. Be sure to [[Help:A_Quick_Guide_to_CWCki#Sign_your_comments|sign your question]] so we know who asked it.

'''Questions for Ivy are due 10 February 2011'''

Assuming that you weren't forced to abort, what was your original plan for ending the saga? Did you have anything special planned for the breakup?--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 17:18, 3 February 2011 (PST)
* Also how did you get Chris to watch End of Evangelion and did he have any prior exposure to the series?--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 19:42, 3 February 2011 (PST)

How much contact did you have with Chris? Also, were you ever actually planning on meeting Chris like he mentions in [[For_My_Sweetest_Ivy|this]] video?--[[User:Sack Thaddic|Sack Thaddic]] 18:15, 3 February 2011 (PST)

How much input did you have into the content Chris produced during the saga? Were the Wedding/Honeymoon Comics based on your suggestions, or did Chris come up with it on his own?--[[User:Dethchemist77|Dethchemist77]] 18:27, 3 February 2011 (PST)

After the saga ended, Chris seemed uncertain about whether you were a really a troll or not. Have you ever considered re-establishing contact with him?--[[User:Dethchemist77|Dethchemist77]] 21:19, 3 February 2011 (PST)

:Doesn't Chris think Ivy died? [[User:Eamoo|Eamoo]] 11:51, 4 February 2011 (PST)

::He thought PandaHalo died earlier in the year; that didn't stop him from e-mailing her once she resurfaced. Not saying it's a good idea for Ivy to do the same, I'm just wondering if Ivy ever thought about it.--[[User:Dethchemist77|Dethchemist77]] 16:39, 4 February 2011 (PST)
:*Of course Ivy's dead, that's why we're getting an interview with her ''ghost''. But that does bring about a bigger issue, which I'll discuss in a separate section.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 18:50, 4 February 2011 (PST)

Opinions regarding how Chris became the way he is vary from assigning him over nine thousand different mental diseases and disorders, to crediting his 'perfect storm' of behavioral issues to simply shitty parenting of an autistic kid. As one of his more dedicated trolls, what are your thoughts? --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 13:43, 4 February 2011 (PST)

Most of the trolling aside from BlueSpike's efforts seems designed with the ultimate goal of helping Chris (eg "Get a job" is a requirement of practically all sweethearts). Do you believe this has had any effect? Can they? Following on from that, do you support BlueSpike style trolling, aka purposely inflicting as much harm on Chris as possible with no 'goal'? --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 13:43, 4 February 2011 (PST)
:That's not really "bluespike". That was really just how blue ended it. People always gloss over all the other stuff that blue got us, most notably the "bob walks in" audio. [[User:Canine|Canine]] 17:43, 4 February 2011 (PST)
Is it true that one time when Chris called you, one of your parents (or someone pretended to be your parent) picked up the phone and told Chris off for calling all the time and so damn early in the morning? --[[User:Nhocgreen|Nhocgreen]] 20:49, 4 February 2011 (PST)

Did you ever save any of the chatlogs/phone calls ect with Chris or are they lost in the Time Void forever? [[User:BSD|BSD]] 23:02, 4 February 2011 (PST)

this idea is fucking retarding i opt out. fuck you champ. -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 23:42, 4 February 2011 (PST)
* edit sorry, was out celebrating chinese new years i meant to say fucking retarded. -- [[User:Clydec|Clyde]] 23:42, 4 February 2011 (PST)

::This from the same guy (or guys behind the fursona), masthead apparant of the PVCC (to which the very same USI and truly stalkerish appearance is also rightfully attributed) who had waited until things are already in a frenzy about Chris and not having everything to do with him (Jackie crap) then started giving scraps of withheld chatlogs and things that aren't even interesting and only may have been in the first place (Bluespike Skype logs, almost useless with just chattext, ect.) and made sure he got in on the CWCki "Chris And..." spergfest of the time by meaninglessly making "Television" into "Chris and Television," just to draw attention to himself and try to drive home that he is a EPIN TROL GODTEIR liek NOONE ELSEEEE, and now flips his fucking shit when there's the chance he might not get to uphold the mystique of the character and his personal army or whatever if he deigns to volunteer answers to some simple questions about what he did, why and how and if those who he considers are at his beck and call answer question that don't need to have anything to do with him. why don't you quit being such a faggot and just answer questions that people who have followed your trolling of chris for years want to know? [[User:12345|12345]] 20:03, 7 February 2011 (PST)

Was there a point were trolling Chris stopped being fun and became a chore? As in, because he kept calling, you felt you HAD to talk to him and you HAD to keep dealing with him? A follow up question: was it your idea to end it or and outside source? -- [[User:TheMAN|TheMAN]] 03:03, 5 February 2011 (PST)

The say that a madman falling in love with you is a scarier situation than a madman wanting to kill you. Were you frightened or disturbed by any of your contacts with Chris? Or if not, were you merely amused by his bizarre methods of showing affection? --[[User:DJChaos|DJChaos]] 15:22, 5 February 2011 (PST)

Outside of what's been documented, are there any funny Chris stories you can share with us? [[User:John Ritter's Nutsack|John Ritter's Nutsack]] 15:57, 5 February 2011 (PST)

When Rocky decided to call the police, did you have any conversations with her at all? Obviously the background check on you came up with nothing, but did you have any problems at all with Rocky's meddling? - [[User:Machop|Machop]] 16:57, 5 February 2011 (PST)

This one's kinda stupid, but i am a little curious. When Chris made the wedding comic the dress was ripped off from November Rain. Since Chris only listens to video game music or songs from guitar hero, chances are he never heard of that song or seen that video. Did you ever mention that you liked guns and roses/November rain, or is that some of his random accessness? --[[User:CaseHa|CaseHa]] 17:10, 5 February 2011 (PST)

If you had one more time to troll Chris before you died, what else would you have done to the manchild? --[[User:PedoforkBait|PedoforkBait]] 18:06, 5 February 2010 (PST)

How come nobody but you guys have been able to contact Chris? Do you guys monitor his e-mail and other messages before he gets them? --[[User:Dankechu|Dankechu]] 07:24, 6 February 2011 (PST)
:What do you mean? People contact Chris all the time. He just doesn't respond. His phone number is everywhere. Also, he doesn't have a computer anymore and I seriously doubt he checks his email too frequently. [[User:Canine|Canine]] 12:24, 6 February 2011 (PST)
::It just seems a little odd to me that you guys have had dibs on the fat manchild for all these years now. Certainly Chrissy talks to other people as well? I don't care how lazy he is, there should also be other lottery winners from his e-mail box.... since 2007. --[[User:Dankechu|Dankechu]] 14:48, 6 February 2011 (PST)
:::Who used email to communicate with him? The only major person I can think of who used email was Jackie and she contacted him from outside of email first. Anyone I'm missing? [[User:Canine|Canine]] 15:13, 6 February 2011 (PST)
::::You wanna be that way, fine, whatever. But I still think you guys checked his email and other shit to keep tabs on him. --[[User:Dankechu|Dankechu]] 15:52, 6 February 2011 (PST)
:::::I think it's pretty much a given that they did or still do have access to his email, despite claims otherwise. Also on /cwc/ recently Tito intercepted a white knighting attempt left in Chris' cellphone voicemail by a /cwc/ user, and they prank called this guy back. Tito posted what the contents were of the message, since the guy claimed he called to troll Chris and Tito revealed it was actually a white knight attempt. That tells you they also have access to his voicemail inbox. [[User:Nigroid|Nigroid]] 14:30, 7 February 2011 (PST)
::::::I think it's more likely that the number the white knight texted was fake or something. I doubt anyone's doing anything illegal here. Nobody's that stupid. [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] 14:39, 7 February 2011 (PST)
:::::::Could be. Would it actually be illegal if you just figured out somebodies voicemail password or it was willingly given though? Anyway, it doesn't really matter and I don't care either way, so that's all I have to say on the matter. Looking forward to this though, I'm glad you guys decided to do it. [[User:Nigroid|Nigroid]] 15:08, 7 February 2011 (PST)
::::::It doesn't necessarily mean that someone is in his voicemail. Chris could've told someone about it. Like that's how [[User:Miela|miela]] was caught. Chris told Jackie about her. Also we run into a lot of dumb white knights when people message accounts like the CWCville library. People think they're talking to Chris and drop their info. I don't remember what happened with the person on /cwc/, but I don't think access to Chris' voicemail was necessary. [[User:Canine|Canine]] 16:09, 7 February 2011 (PST)
:::::::This happened like last month, which was awhile after Chris left the internet. This guy left a message in Chris' voicemail, then posted audio of a message he got back that was someone impersonating Chris. Tito then showed up and said it wasn't the real Chris and that he'd had someone make that call, and that this guy actually left a white knight message on Chris' phone, not a trolling message as he claimed. There was no way he told anyone about it since he'd already ragequit again. Seems pretty clear he had access to the voicemail. [[User:Nigroid|Nigroid]] 00:27, 8 February 2011 (PST)
::::::::People had brought up the "Chris told someone" theory back in that cwc thread too, and Tito pretty much confirmed that PVCC still had contact with Chris, possibly through Samantha.--[[User:Nhocgreen|Nhocgreen]] 20:59, 8 February 2011 (PST)

Probably a stupid question but have you ever talked to Barb or Bob on the phone? If so, How did it go?
--[[User:Lucida|Lucida]] 7:41, 6 February 2011 (PST)

How did you find out about Chris stealing his parent's credit cards for his PSN account?
--[[User:Lucida|Lucida]] 7:52, 6 February 2011 (PST)

When you started your trolling endeavor did you ever realize how horrifyingly obsessed Chris would become with you? Also, given how chilling it is for people to watch the videos he made for you, what was your reaction to it all? Was it scary, hilarious, or an odd mixture of the two?
[[User:OsirisLord|OsirisLord]] 00:21, 7 February 2011 (PST)

Kind of piggybacking on another user's question: If you had had the chance to meet Chris in person, how do you think the event would have progressed? Would you have attempted to follow Chris's itinerary to a certain point before suggesting different activities, ride it the whole way through, or completely hijack it? Also, judging how the date with Emily (and any other female) went, it seems that Chris's ultimate goal in meeting up with a woman is to kiss and/or bed her. Would you have been prepared for his advances? Would you have brought along a chaperon/bodyguard, or did you believe that Chris was actually pretty harmless and that you could easily deflect his moves?
-- [[User:Elliecoral|Elliecoral]] 17:08 7 February 2011 (EST) [minor edit for grammar]

Ivy, I am curious. What was your reaction to the creeptacular videos Chris made for you, particularly "Message for Ivy" and "For my Sweetest Ivy"? Did you start to second guess your decision to help troll Chris? What was your reaction to "For my Sweetest Ivy" getting played on the radio? It seems Chris has arguably made some of his creepiest and disturbing videos during your saga, and was totally enamored with you. Was there anything different you were doing in your trolling of Chris over the phone, as he seemed to be obsessed with your more than any other "sweetheart" of any saga before or since. I only ask this since we don't have your phone calls to hear for ourselves, so I'm curious if you did anything unique to get Chris so wrapped up in you? [[User:Nigroid|Nigroid]] 14:26, 7 February 2011 (PST)

Ivy's Ghost, what was it about what you did that seemed to influence Chris to draw comic and also bring the crazy out of him? Also, you seem to have been the last sweetheart to use a fursona/sonic recolor sidekicks. Would you recommend future sweethearts to do the same? [[User:Barachulove|Barachulove]] 20:23, 7 February 2011 (PST)

Ivy, I guess this question has to do with meeting Chris, but how badly did Chris want to meet you in real life? And did Chris have any intentions of getting married with you(because of his daughter Crystal), or possibly getting a place together(If it went that far in Chris's mind)? Or did Chris just want you inside of his filthy home and having degrading "hanky-panky" in the garbage heaps of his house(because nothing says romance like rolling around in some garbage with an overweight man-child)? [[Chris_Pickles|Chris_Pickles]] 4:20, 8 February 2011 (EST)

:He did [[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"|propose]] to her, you know. Also piggybacking on Chris_Pickles' question, how did you feel about the marriage proposal? Did you tell him how crazy it was?--[[User:Nhocgreen|Nhocgreen]] 20:59, 8 February 2011 (PST)

Any relation to Poison Ivy? [[User:TheIronFjord|TheIronFjord]] 10:29, 8 February 2011 (EST)

This is an odd one, but was there, at any time, a moment when you felt a morsel of pity and/or (misguided) affection for Chris, or believed that he could be changed? (Granted, we mostly despise Chris, but there are a few times when some of us feel sorry for him and wish he could improve himself.) Do you believe Chris can redeem himself and become a somewhat functioning member of society, or is he a lost cause? For that matter, did you consider white knighting? -- [[User:Elliecoral|Elliecoral]] 18:11, 8 February 2011 (EST)

Your saga produced some of the most bizzare behavior from Chris. While he certainly did some weird stuff before you came along, his videos for you contained some of the most disturbing behavior he has ever shown. Among Chris's sweethearts, what made you so unique that you were able to get such strangeness out of him? Did you approach him differently? [[User:Farm Zombie|Farm Zombie]] 01:08, 9 February 2011 (PST)
[[Category:CWCki projects]]

Did you ever contact Chris through any other persona, ie via the mailbags? Also, what exactly prompted Chris to become so enamoured of you so quickly - in other words, how did you first approach him and what did you do or say which led him to produce [[CWC's Message For Ivy]]? [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 10:56, 9 February 2011 (PST)

List of Chris's edits to the CWCki

2011-02-04T14:31:20Z

Baxter: /* See Also */

[[Image:chrisshotweb.jpg|thumb|right|Summary of the incident.]]
After Chris discovered the [[CWCki]] in [[March 2010]], he [[Cwc_blog#14 March 2010|demanded]] that pages related to his family and [[Gal-Pal]]s be removed, giving two deadlines. Around midnight on [[April 2010|1 April]], past the second deadline, he decided to attack CWCki, signing up as [[User:GodofThunderGodofWar|GodofThunderGodofWar]]. In true CWC style, his [[Special:Contributions/GodofThunderGodofWar|vandalism]] was [[fail|less than impressive]]. In fact, due to the fact that he made them on April Fools' Day, many users just assumed that it was an elaborate and lulzy prank on the part of the administrators. But no, it was f'real. Christian's posts were aimed at altering the articles he vandalized to make the CWCKi seem to be praising him. As usual Chris's [[Chris and English|tenuous grasp of grammar]] made his edits stand out like a sore thumb.

Although Chris originally demanded that the CWCki's administrators only edit or remove pages related to his friends and family, it is perhaps telling that when he finally set himself to actively vandalizing the site, he ignored those pages, choosing instead to make edits [[Chris and his Ego|glorifying himself]].

(Please note that all times listed are EST.)

==The edits==
===12:35===
His first action was to edit the Did You Know? column, removing the majority of the factoids while adding a few of his own, most of which were merely rewrites of existing comments.

{{quotebox|
*...This webiste, the CWCki, is a LOAD OF BULL?
*...that Christian Chandler ALWAYS IS the mayor of [[CWCville]]?
*...that [[Pixelblocks]] are not to be confused with neither [[Pickles|Pickleblocks]] nor [[Prickly-Wicklies|Pricklyblocks]]?
*...that Chris buys [[McDonalds|healthy food]], [[My Coke Rewards|good drinks]] and just [[PS3|necessities]] with [[Monthly_Tugboat|Good Money]]?
*...that Chris has been recording himself as early as [[Song of Christian|10th grade]]?
}}

Chris left the following factoids untouched:

*...that a [[Curse-ye-ham-ye-ha Retraction|Forgiveness blessing]] can counter the extreme bad luck and misfortune associated with the [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]] attack?
*...that [[Chris]]'s sense of humor is [[Random-access humor|SO RANDOM XDXD]]?
*...that Chris is the [[The Game Place#Chris.27s_antics|Level Up King]]?
*...that [[Virginia is for Virgins]]?
*...that Chris really likes [[Britney Spears]] (no matter what they all say)?
:*...that his favorite song from "[[:Image:CWCSchuBrit.jpg|Air Britney]]" is ''[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rHbCK3ETweQ E-Mail My Heart]''?
*...that Chris is a descendant of [[Anne Boleyn]], Queen of England?

Note how he failed to [[autism|notice the sarcasm]] in the above comments.

''Note: In his original edit, the link "10th grade" linked to a non-existent "10th grade" page.''

===12:42===
He then changed the Article of the Now from [[Ian Brandon Anderson]] to himself.

{{quotebox|
[[Image:0782-CWCSpread.JPG|right|200px|lolwut.]]

'''Christian Weston Chandler''' (born '''Christopher Weston Chandler''' on 24 February [[1982]]) is a [[autism|high-functioning autistic]] [[virgin with rage|virgin]], Honest, Cool and Honest Dude, and creator of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]], a [[Chris and his Ego|brilliant]] character, starring in his own self-titled [[Sonichu (comic)|online comic book]].

His adult life has been largely defined by his goal of most Normal Human Beings; Finding their Meaning of Existence, Their [[Love Quest|True Love]], Their own [[Chris-Chan Sonichu|Self-Character]]. No One should ever interfere or ever make a mockery of such a [[Chris and English|tride]] and true quest to finding HIS own Happiness with [[Women's Rights|his]] WOMAN who is to be his Wife.

Yes, friends, it gets far sweeter.
}}

This edit is stands as perhaps the most condensed essence of Christian to ever emerge in pseudo-paragraph format. Between the utter butchery of the English language, blatant ego stroking, and unintentional creepiness ("Yes, friends, it gets far sweeter") Christian pretty much manages to sum up what legions of trolls have spent nearly half a decade trying to record for the world. Also note that, while on a website
dedicated to trolling him, he still inserts links to other parts of the wiki. In all likelihood, Chris planned to vandalize these elements as well but stopped due to [[stress]].

''Note: In his original edit, the link "brilliant" linked to a non-existent "brilliant" page.''

===12:44===
A couple of minutes after, he made the infamous [[CWCRockin4Way.jpg]] the Picture of the Now.

{{quotebox|[[Image:CWCRockin4Way.jpg|300px|left|lolwut?]]

A recently leaked image shows an illustration by [[Chris]] having [[Chris and sex|Sweet, Sweet Sex]] with three young women, including a white one, a black one, and one in-between.[[Random-access humor|Chocolate-Vanilla Swirls!!! YAY! 8D]]}}
''Note: In his original edit, the link "Sweet, Sweet Sex" linked to a non-existent "Sweet, Sweet Sex" page.''

==TL;DR==

Chris, despite being given a chance to strike back at trolls directly, managed to fail due to his own ego.

==See Also==
* [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica]]
* [[JenkinsJinkies]]

{{Lists}}

[[category:Lists]]

JenkinsJinkies

2011-02-01T04:59:15Z

Baxter: /* Trollin Train */

'''JenkinsJinkies''' (a.k.a. Junior Jenkins) was Chris's [[Disguises|trollsona]] from May to late August [[2010]].

==CWCki==
[[image:Fatjenkins.jpg|thumb|The great JenkinsJinkies]]
JenkinsJinkies began as another CWCki account, made by Chris to confirm that the antenna he had removed from his [[PS3]] wasn't a bug in [[PS3/How the PS3 is Hacked]], a bait page made by [[Clyde]]. It was quickly discovered that JenkinsJinkies was Chris, and [[Trollin Train|appropriate action]] was taken soon afterwards. Clyde contacted Chris through JenkinsJinkies' [[User talk:JenkinsJinkies|talk page]], and it resulted in a short correspondence between the two.

{{quote|I lost my young virginity with a Seinor Cheerleader; her [[china]] was sweeeeettt! Plus, as an Anon, I prefer to keep my add off of the web. I would not want Chris coming after my ass. The mindfuck that he is, I would not want to fall victim of one of his impulsive manchild rampages. I just enjoy getting the LULZ off of him.|JenkinsJinkies, the 14 year old [[homos|sodomite]] who had gay sex at the age of 7 and lost his [[virgin|virginity]] to a High School student beforehand. Who also lives directly [[14 Branchland Ct.|across the street]] from Chris.}}

Chris believed playing a troll who was [[Chris and Reality|legitimately]] afraid of Chris's wrath would totally convince [[Clyde Cash]] himself that he was legit. He also unsuccessfully tried to scare the trolls into thinking he was plotting to hunt them down, one by one. Several [[/cwc/|lesser]] trolls believed they were the first ones to realize that JenkinsJinkies was Chris, and blew the whistle every now and again, but such leaks were uncommon and generally most trolls played along.

==Trollin Train==

As the trolls began to tug on JenkinsJinkies's marionette strings, a [[Trollin Train|trolling forum]] entirely dedicated to making Chris paranoid was established. Despite all posts, members and threads being only a few days old, Chris was [[Naive|completely convinced]] that it was the official trolling hub, where all the nefarious plots made against him were conceived.

As if it weren't obvious enough that Junior Jenkins was Chris, he also went out of his way to praise Chris for his ingenious schemes for halting the trolls wicked plans and/or dissuade the trolls from even trying - often combining the two themes into the same post.

{{quote|I have to hand it to him, he makes it Frustrating to Troll Him. It's like we have to PAY AirFare or HitchHike Dangerously and do it Old-Fashioned with Accordian Cameras and shit like that.|JuniorJenkins, [[#Damn! (Wed 25 Aug 2010 5:42 am)|Trollin Train]].}}

Junior Jenkins also had run-ins with the ghosts of [[Patti Chandler]] and seven year old Christopher Chandler as Chris inexplicably believed that trolls would be frightened by these events. They were not, and Jenkins was roundly mocked.

==PS3 Destruction==

The most infamous event of Trolling Train took place when Surfshack Tito offered $9001 for Chris's PS3 to be smashed. Due to a misinterpretation of Tito's criteria, Chris thought he could get the reward if ''he'' did the smashing and simply had Junior claim to witness it. The rest [[PS3#Destruction|is history]].

Though Chris did not receive the $9001, he [[Monthly tugboat|somehow]] replaced his PS3 within four days.

==See also==
*[[Trollin Train]]
*[[JenkinsJinkiesCwckiApplication.MOV]]
*[[Disguises]]

{{stub}}
[[Category:Chris-chan]]

Chris and mental healthcare

2011-01-31T17:34:11Z

Baxter: /* The 2004 survey */ That's not what OCD is.

[[Chris]] has a troubled relationship with '''psychology'''. He claims that he was held down by the school psychologist at grade school while his screams were recorded (most likely over dramatic bullshit), and was forced to see a psychologist for anger management classes after being kicked out of [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]]. Chris currently refuses to see a psychologist, opting to see a [[Rocky Shoemaker|pastoral counselor]] instead.

==The problem(s) with Chris==
===In his own mind===
Chris claims to be [[autistic]], [[Homos|homophobic]] as a genuine phobia, and a victim of [[Noviophobia]], a made-up phobia of boyfriends. He also diagnosed himself with [[Wikipedia:Dissociative Identity Disorder|dissociative identity disorder]] in [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 30th, 2009|the August 30th Captain's Log]], although he later revealed in [[Mailbag 4]] that it was "a lie to momentarily derail the trolls". (Once again, Chris proved that he had no understanding of how serious mental disorders can be. Pretending to be crazy is an odd sort of [[wikipedia:Catch-22 (logic)|Catch-22]].)

Chris also seems to be at a level of incompetence that prevents him from realizing how incompetent he is. A [[Wikipedia:Cornell University|Cornell University]] [http://gagne.homedns.org/~tgagne/contrib/unskilled.html psychology journal] details this phenomenon; it is a disturbingly accurate account of Chris's reaction to [[reality]].

===The 2004 survey===
The psychiatrist who compiled [[autism papers|a survey]] of Chris's issues following his troubles at [[PVCC]] in [[2004]] echoed the diagnosis of autism that Chris received some time in his youth, and took note of "an obsessional quality to his preoccupation with finding a girlfriend". He also administered a [[Wikipedia:Folstein test|Folstein test]], a brief questionnaire designed to detect cognitive impairment — Chris racked up a perfect score, indicating no problems with his memory or basic information processing abilities. On the [[Wikipedia:Global Assessment of Functioning|Global Assessment of Functioning]], the doctor rated Chris a 70, roughly halfway in between an average adult and someone with socially debilitating mental illness.

===The trolls' perspective===
The rest of the human race believes that Chris has ''way'' more than autism to worry about. Popular theories mark him as a sociopath and/or a pathological [[ego|narcissist]], for instance, and also point towards what seems like a paranoid streak (as when Chris proposed that the [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|Greene County]] school board has [[100 2178|conspired over a period of decades]] to make him miserable). Since the only available view is from a distance, though, there's no way anyone can know for certain if Chris's brain is garlanded with healthy chunks of the DSM-IV-TR or if he's merely a gullible idiot with a terrible upbringing and worse personality (and autism).

Until Chris gets some sustained professional attention, most of the speculation about his issues remains exactly that. Which leads to a larger problem...

==Professional help?==
One of the most [[Rage|frustrating]] elements of Chris is his adamant refusal to take help from any source. In the aftermath of his suspension from PVCC, his evaluators [[Autism papers|repeatedly recommended]] further counseling and psychiatric treatment, but Chris and his parents refused. It seems that [[Bob]] and [[Barbara]] think that the world of mental health hasn't evolved past the turn-of-the-century treatment of strait jackets and lobotomies. The only thing close to therapy that Chris has ever been in was a compulsory Anger Management class, and we all know [[Chris and anger|how much good that did]]. About the only authority figure he listens to is [[Rocky Shoemaker]], his pastoral counselor; he claims that he has no need for psychotherapy because his pastor is better at helping him than anyone with, you know, years of training and experience in helping people with psychiatric problems. He's shown repeated disregard for the authority of health professionals.<ref>[[Mailbag_2#In which Chris acts superior to an experienced Doctor|Mailbag 2]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag_4#Chris the close-minded|Mailbag 4]]</ref> It is suspected that, even if Chris received professional help, he would disregard most of it and undermine the therapy.

It would be likely that he could seek the help of a professional for little or no cost, as his [[monthly tugboat]] in the form of SSI does offer basic psychological services that would allow him the ability to talk to a board-certified counselor and get the help he does need. It's likely though he doesn't even know this service is available, as he only regards his SSI check as income or a cheap means of getting [[PS3]] games, [[LittleBigPlanet]] or [[Guitar Hero]] DLC, and [[sex toys]] rather than a reassurance that he is covered under federal [[Wikipedia:Medicaid|Medicaid]] or the equivalent state Medicaid program offered by the Commonwealth of Virginia.

It seems Chris only acknowledges his personal flaws if they get him pity or used to demonstrate that he's beaten them already. Notice how often Chris claims to have won the battle over autism,<ref>Example: [[Sarah Reveals Herself#Chris is over his autism|Sarah May chat]]</ref> only to fall back on "I have autism!" as an excuse.<ref>Example: [[Father Call]]</ref> Similarly, he wrote ''[[Nintendo Power Magazine]]'' to tell them he conquered Noviophobia, only to say later that his fear "came back like a boomerang."<ref>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/sonichu/SchusNews8.htm</ref>

Chris refuses to get help because he doesn't think he needs any, and because he has better things ([[PS3|games]], [[anime]], [[Kimmi|porn]]) to spend his money on. Regardless of how blatantly stupid his actions are, regardless of how often trolls ([[BlueSpike|including a 13-year-old]]) trick him into doing horrible, horrible things, regardless of how any mental health worker worth his salt would pin Chris down like a butterfly to get a chance to crack open his impenetrable shell of [[fail]], Chris will carry on as usual, justifying away everything that would inconvenience him even slightly.

Chris has no problem telling other people to seek professional help, however. In the [[Mailbag]], he has occasionally responded to his detractors with retorts like [[Chris and Hypocrisy|"Go See a Psychiatrist."]]<ref>[[Mailbag_35#Funny, that's the same advice we keep giving Chris|Mailbag 35]]</ref>

==History of medication==
According to the [[2004]] psychiatric survey, at some point in his life Chris was prescribed the antidepressant medication [[Wikipedia:Imipramine|Imipramine]]. It's not clear when he was prescribed the drug, or for what exact reason, but it was likely some time in his younger days. Since the advent of more sophisticated antidepressant drugs like [[Wikipedia:Prozac|Prozac]] in the late [[1980s]], the use of Imipramine to treat depression and other psychological disorders has grown less and less common. More recently, however, Imipramine has commonly been prescribed to patients who have [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|urinary problems]].

The same document notes that, as of [[2004]], Chris had been taking the antidepressant [[Wikipedia:Paxil|Paxil]] for four years in order to deal with his [[stress]] and [[Chris and anger|anger issues]]. One of the survey's recommendations was an increase in his daily dose of the drug, but it's not clear how long Chris continued taking it afterward.

Chris continues to take antidepressant medication to this day, but he is no longer on Paxil specifically. In [[Mailbag 13]], he explained that he switched to a different medication in order to avoid some of Paxil's side effects. He didn't specify what those side effects were or what medication he's now taking; only that the Paxil caused problems that "only hit adults". Paxil may have been making it difficult for Chris to [[mass debating|achieve orgasm]].

Another of Paxil's more notable side effects is the potential for substantial weight gain, which couldn't have mixed well with Chris's [[McDonald's|diet]] and sedentary lifestyle.

==Past instances of professional help (or lack thereof)==
===[[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]]===
When Chris attended NGES, there was an incident where he was supposedly restrained or molested, depending on whom you talk to. It has been claimed by Bob that they wanted to send Chris to an "institution." What they meant was likely a place where Chris could see professionals who could work with Chris's problems as opposed to teachers who deal with normal students. What Bob probably thought is he would be sent to a nuthouse. Either way, something that could have done some good in his early development didn't happen.

===[[Mary Lee Walsh]]===
Although not a mental health professional, Walsh's experience at dealing with a large body of students and their individual problems makes her experienced on the issue. She has also [http://www.bookfinder.com/dir/i/The_Freshman_Experience-Creating_College_Success_Piedmont_Virginia_Community/0787288381/ written a book on coping with college life]. Despite her advanced knowledge and experience, Chris chose the better path of [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|cursing her]] and putting her low on his [[Scale of Respect]].

===[[Autism papers|Psychiatric Papers]]===
Following his outburst towards Mary Lee Walsh, Chris was sent to a psychiatrist for evaluation. The resulting papers easily show a number of things, most of which can easily be told by trolls themselves. Another interesting thing is that, despite the encouragement to follow up on this, Chris's parents refuse to on the account of [[Chris and money|insurance problems]].

The documents note that at some point Chris received psychiatric evaluation at the Center for Learning Potential in Mt. Sidney, Virginia (a small town northwest of his home in Charlottesville). They don't say when this took place, but given the location of the Center, it was likely either during his elementary-school years or some time after the Chandlers moved back to Charlottesville in the summer of 2000.

===Anger management and the shrink===
Following his encounter with Mary Lee Walsh, he was [[Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College#Kicked_Out_of_College|ordered]] to take anger management classes. The only thing that seemed to arise from it were complaints that he had to pay to see a professional... and... well... [[Chris and anger|he still can't control his anger]]. There's very little information about his anger management classes, as it occurred in the pre-[[ED]] days, and is only mentioned in a few old documents of Chris' that have surfaced. He's never really talked about it since, and it's never come up in comics or videos.

===[[Rocky Shoemaker]]===
Religious institutions are fond of providing counseling services to all members of their congregations, sometimes unwisely as a method of hammering them with doctrine to solve their problems, sometimes beneficially by giving them a person to talk to for free and referring them to a real professional if necessary. Whether Rocky is generally beneficial or harmful to the people who come to see her is uncertain, but she [http://cof-umc.org/blog/?p=3 is certainly admired for her past work]. What remains certain is that she is probably not the best solution for Chris because...
#He considers her to be a perfect, all-encompassing alternative to a qualified professional.
#He barely listens to anything she fucking says.
#He misconstrues everything she says, accepting advice he likes and ignoring advice he doesn't like.
She has told him about his past habits being unacceptable, but Chris remains as determined as ever to be a total idiot. Although she has put a stop to trolling plans, [[Fridays After Five|his behavior remains the same]]. She also told him it would be a good idea to stop posting videos on YouTube, since they only feed the trolls.

[[Cleveland Show Voice Rant|That hasn't]] [[100 2178|really worked]] [[100 2188|out now]], [[100 2189|has it]]?

About the only thing that he has taken away from their sessions is that [[Chris_and_sex#Moral_basis_on_sex_and_double_standards|he can fuck someone before they are married]].

===Relationship Management Classes===
Chris mentioned in a [[Addressing_Liquid#Video|video]] from October 2009 that he had been taking some relationship management classes. Undoubtedly, Chris feels he has found some form of real life [[Dating education|date ed]]. More likely, Chris has come upon a class for couples who want to ''manage their already established relationships'' as opposed to find out how to get into one. The true nature of the course is irrelevant since Chris is creepy and out of place pretty much anywhere he goes.

===White knights and trolls===
It doesn't take a lot of effort for anyone to see that Chris has no common sense. Likewise, common sense being... common, [[white knights]] and [[trolls]] are often quick to point out that most of what Chris does is stupid/insane/socially abnormal. He doesn't fucking get it. As a result, many trolls have become armchair psychologists pondering [[Autism|why exactly he doesn't get it]]. It doesn't matter what they come up with, the result is always that Chris doesn't listen to anyone if he doesn't want to, no matter what level they are on the ladder. [[Vivian Gee|Some white knights]] have gotten so fed up with Chris's adamant refusal to improve himself or heed advice that they've essentially moved on to becoming professional trolls.

==Footnotes==
<references/>

==See also==
*[[Autism]]
*[[Autism papers]]
*[[Asperger's syndrome]]
*[[Dreams]]

{{Chris and}}

Fridays After Five

2011-01-28T05:33:53Z

Baxter: /* 16 July Sighting */

[[File:WantWoman.jpg|thumb|left|140px|You know he's [[straight]] because his [[bra]] says so.]]
[[Image:Fa5 2colorlogo.jpg|thumb|200px|Chris's new [[attraction Location|prowling ground]]]]
'''Fridays After Five''' is a large block party/concert series that takes place in [[Charlottesville]] from spring until fall. In [[June 2010]] [[Chris]] was video recorded there, [[C-Ya Later|enjoying real life for once]].

Chris first mentioned Fridays After Five in a [[6 June 2010|video]] explaining his near hit-and-run on [[Michael Snyder]]. Based upon this knowledge, the manchild has been attending the event since at least 4 June 2010. Chris first alludes to his knowledge of Fridays after Five in the video [[Rollin' and Trollin']], in which he stands outside the Charlottesville Pavilion and mentions how [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys]] play there every Friday night.

== 18 June Sighting==
{{-}}
[[Image:Chrisgirl1.jpg|thumb|left|Chris trying to pick up a [[boyfriend-free girl]].]]
[[Image:Dancing.gif|thumb|185px|right|Chris attempting to dance. Note the man in the foreground shaking his head in disbelief/disgust.]]

On 18 June 2010, Chris went to one of these events and a good samaritan ([[YouTube]] name [http://www.youtube.com/user/0ArchieBunker0 0ArchieBunker0]) took these videos and pictures of him out in public.

According to the author, Chris wore a T-shirt that says "I Enjoy [[Vagina]]" and was wearing a "[[gay]] circular thing" on his hip which is most likely his [[PokeWalker of Fail|PokéWalker]]. At some point Chris pulled back his crude shirt to reveal his [[obesity|flabby gut]] and [[muscle bra|female support wear]], which he had apparently seen fit to write "[[Love Quest|WANT WOMAN!]]" on with permanent marker. Note the apparent, inexplicable (knowing Chris) absence of the [[Medallion_of_Fail|Medallion of Fail]] - although it could have been removed just temporarily in order to simplify the (probably planned) act of pulling back the shirt.

Chris's clothing indicates he is looking to put a new twist on his [[Love_Quest|old tricks]]. Like the [[Attraction_sign|attraction sign]], Chris is shown making a point to display the writing on his clothing, declaring that he "enjoys vagina" and "wants woman". This is yet another example that this [[autistic]] man-child does not learn from the mistakes of his past. Also, the videos filmed at this event mostly showed the back of Chris's head, which shows a small but emerging [[bald]] spot.

Besides exposing his covered bosom to potential [[sweetheart]]s - mostly [[pedofork|severely underage]] - Chris spent his time at the event [[Flipnote Hatena|drawing flipnotes]] on his [[Nintendo]] DSi, and trying to dance with a disturbing mix of Chicken Dance and [[autism]] - with all the grace and skill of [[CWC Fighter]].

It is unlikely that Chris was aware of being photographed, which proves that all these actions are Chris's idea of being normal. When Chris eventually realized (or it seemed so) he was being observed, he suddenly disappeared like Batman.

== 9 July Sighting ==

[[File:FAF-06092010.jpg|thumb|right|Chris sat on his fat ass - a truly rare sight.]]
On 9 July, the troll who spotted Chris on [[McIntire Park#Independence Day Sighting |Independence Day]] spotted him again. According to the troll, Chris had unscrewed the zoom lens from his DSi and was using it as a rudimentary telescope by pressing it up to his eye.

{{quotebox|
Sorry for not adding more with the pictures, but I did notice that Chris had taken his DSi zoom lense(thanks for clarifying that up for me, guys) off his DSi and was using it as a telescope. He had it pressed up against his eye and was constantly watching around him with it for awhile. He also had this habit of taking off and putting on his sunglasses within seconds of each other. It seemed like he paid more attention to what was going on around him than what was happening at the concert. At one point, I noticed a girl, who looked like she was probably still in highschool, jump up on the ledge beside Chris to join a group of friends who happened to be stationed behind the manbaby. In the process, Chris turned to her and it looked like he said something to her, because immediately her facial expression changed from a legit happy one to a forced smile one. She joined up with her friends and they immediately huddled up together, whispering about something. At the same time they all looked up at Chris, and laughed. I can only imagine what he had said to the poor girl. A few moments later, one of the guys in the group picked up his cell phone and snapped a picture of Chris from behind. Maybe he's aware of who Chris is and will share his story somewhere. At that point, whether or not Chris realized they were making fun of him, he picked up his stuff and switched seating spots. I chose to take my leave at that point.}}

This time the troll managed to take a picture of Chris, who appears to be wearing three [[Pokéwalker of Fail|Pokéwalkers of Fail]]. Two are red and white, and a custom painted one is barely visible underneath his arm. He also has what looks like a small bottle of hand sanitizer tucked into his belt. Chris [[The_GAMe_PLACe|has been known]] to immediately follow up any handshake with using hand sanitizer on himself. Chris is also holding a [[Attraction Sign|small piece of paper]] between his legs in both photographs, proving even further that he hasn't learned a single thing in the past seven years.

{{clear}}

==16 July Sighting==

[[File:Manzone.jpg|thumb|right|Something like this.]]

On 16 July a different troll managed to spot Chris at the park. While no photos were taken, the description given paints a very... ''unusual'' picture.

{{quotebox|This probably isn't a big surprise to anyone, but Chris was also at Fridays After Five on July 16th. No pictures, I'm afraid. He was wearing a bright orange sleeveless shirt with what looked like a beer logo on the back and holding a Budweiser aluminum bottle, a little mini fan made to look like an iPod, and a hula hoop for some reason. Most importantly he had a sort of basic attraction sign with him, nothing elaborate or directly sexual but it said something like "Friendly and Flirty Man Zone" or something similar to that and with more smaller text under that I couldn't make out. He was sitting on the back grass part and left a few minutes before the music was over. I would have loved to catch Chris's attempts at using the hula hoop, I bet that was funny as hell.}}

While the initial footage from June introduced the "Want Women" bra as a sort of makeshift attraction sign, the most recent sighting reports a full-fledged return of an actual [[attraction sign]], albeit a very basic one.

The hula hoop is more puzzling. It's entirely possible that Chris brought it to add to the dance moves seen on this very page, but given Chris's [[Sonichu's Edge|abysmally low stamina]], [[obesity|corpulent physique]], and total lack of coordination or dancing ability, this seems like a very unusual choice. Another theory is that he used it to mark the boundaries of his "Friendly and Flirty Man Zone". He can be seen at the end of one of the videos of him 'dancing' apparently looking at and drifting towards a girl using two hula hoops near the stage; whether this inspired him to bring one himself or not is a matter of speculation.

==Gallery==
{{-}}
<center>
<gallery>
File:100 0669.JPG|The return of the King.
File:100 0670.JPG|[[100 2178|All alone.]]
File:100 0671.JPG|Fuck yeah! A [[gal-pal]]!
File:100 0673.JPG|The gal pal's gone...
File:100 0674.JPG|Oh! Potential new gal-pals!
File:100 0676.JPG|Creepy...
File:100 0677.JPG|...fucking...
File:100 0678.JPG|...scene.
File:100 0681.JPG|Eventually, an urgent need to [[Flipnote Hatena|DRAW SOME SHIT]] prevails.
File:100 0682.JPG|Chris enjoying the real world. Also, DAT ASSCRACK.
File:100 0683.JPG|Chris has a deep conversation with an 8 year old.
File:100 0693.JPG|A wide shot.
File:100 0694.JPG|A close-up of Chris. Notice that he hasn't bothered to fully remove his shirt.
File:100 0695.JPG|Chris showing off his muscular bosom.
File:100 0696.JPG|LOOK AT THAT GUT GODDAMN
File:100_0697.JPG|Chris trying to look sexy for Da Ladies.
File:Fridayafterplan.png|CWC's plan B.
File:FAF-06092010.jpg|From autistic trucker to dorkish plumber.
File:WantMan.jpg|CWC's [[Homos|plan C]].
File:Hulahoop.png|Chris and the hula hoop.
</gallery>
</center>

==Videos==

{{collapsible
|Videos of Chris in a public place, a rare sight.
|
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = manchild
| video = {{#ev:youtube|J4dib0pmpjE}}
| Stardate = 18 June 2010
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/0ArchieBunker0 0ArchieBunker0]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = 100_0690.MOV
| video = {{#ev:youtube|tbU7ao0i-Ew}}
| Stardate = 19 June 2010
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/0ArchieBunker0 0ArchieBunker0]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = 100_0691.MOV
| video = {{#ev:youtube|dDlJ-ZY5Opk}}
| Stardate = 19 June 2010
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/0ArchieBunker0 0ArchieBunker0]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = 100_0692.MOV
| video = {{#ev:youtube|vdibt4Ll2gs}}
| Stardate = 19 June 2010
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/0ArchieBunker0 0ArchieBunker0]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}
}}

==See also==
*[[Flipnote Hatena]]
*[[Love Quest]]
*[[Rollin' and Trollin']]
*[[Pedofork]]

==External links==
*[http://www.mediafire.com/?nkhrmmtjymg Download the videos]
*[http://www.charlottesvillepavilion.com/fridaysafterfive/ Fridays After Five at the Charlottesville Pavilion]

[[Category:Social life]]
[[Category:Outdoor videos]]
[[Category: Chris-chan videos, June 2010| 2010-06-18]]
[[Category: Field agent videos| 2010-06-18]]
[[Category: Eyewitness Accounts]]

Hard Love Quest

2011-01-18T04:04:04Z

Baxter: /* The Poem */

'''"Hard Love Quest"''' is a poem by [[Christian Weston Chandler]]. It was written on January 18, [[2004]] and published the next month in the second issue of ''[[Sonichu's News Dash]]''. In addition to being incredibly self-pitying to the point where it would make an emo kid vomit, the poem also has bad spelling and grammar, improper punctuation and capitalization, and no sense of rhythm or meter. A terrible poem in every conceivable regard.

Note: The poem's title is presumably supposed to mean "A Love Quest Which Is Difficult", not "A Quest For Some [[Homos|Hard Love]]".

==The Poem==
<center>'''[[Chris and rape|Hard Love]] [[Love Quest|Quest]]''' <ref>[http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcville//SchusNews2.htm Sonichu's Poetry Corner (SND #2)]</ref> <br>
''By. Christian W. Chandler<br>
January 18, 2004'' <br><br>
</center>

<poem>Here you see, a sad and lonesome Christian C.
Without girlfriend love he feels an older age,
as he is still “Stuck as a [[virgin with rage]].”
He search low and high to the end,
the only delay is the fear of being already beaten by a BOYFRIEND.
Why do all the girls have to be already taken… a real shame,
boyfriends of all girls of possible matches for me are really LAME.
As I sit and [[sigh]],
[[The Creepy Stare|I watch the girls go by]].
Afraid of a lame intersecption,
I sit out in the open without hesitation.
Matching Girl descriptions are free,
I wish one girl would notice and approach me.
It would be [[Sonic the Hedgehog|way past cool]], per-say,
if I could get a girlfriend by Valentine’s Day.
But for now as you see,
I am a sad and lonesome “C.”</poem>

==Analysis==

Bad, but certainly not the worst of Chris's poetry.

Chris originally seems to have gone free-verse for the rhyming scheme and meter, but about halfway though the poem, he built a rhyming pattern and at least attempted a consistent meter. One would expect that Chris would get progressively lazier as he wrote the poem, but Chris's drive for perfection amazes us as usual. He used a full-circle ending, repeating sad and lonesome...C from the first line. Whether this is a intentional literary technique or Chris being lazy as usual is debatable. Judging from the fact that Chris [[A Week With Christian Chandler|slept through English class]], he probably never learned any traditional poetic technique, hence this is likely just an example of Chris's amazing capacity for laziness. Chris also seems to have forgotten what the point of view is, switching from third person to first person halfway though the poem. Proofread much, Chris?

==Fan videos==

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Dramatic Reading
| video = {{#ev:youtube|1rN7PtUMMYg}}
| Stardate = 28 May 2010
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/manwithoutabody manwithoutabody]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info = The first poem read, along with [[Valentine's Day Hymn]] and [[Sonichu's Ode to Rosechu]].
}}

==References==
<references />

==See also:==
*[[Love Quest]]

{{Writings}}

[[Category:Poetry]]

Talk:Future

2010-12-18T00:07:23Z

Baxter: Created page with "Wondering how long it will be before Clyde blasts this entire article to the moon. ~~~~"

Wondering how long it will be before Clyde blasts this entire article to the moon. [[User:Baxter|Baxter]] 16:07, 17 December 2010 (PST)

SonichuBabies

2010-10-27T02:35:18Z

Baxter: /* Transcript */

'''SonichuBabies''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 25 [[October 2010]]. In it, Chris rips off the [[1980s]] cartoon ''Muppet Babies'' by recasting the [[Chaotic Combo]] as [[Sonee and Rosey|babies]]. Much like [[Things Chris has ripped off|everything else he steals]], Chris's version of the series lacks any of the charm and wit the original cartoon had, transforming it into "Chaotic Combo as babies, doing stuff babies aren't ''supposed'' to be doing!"

Chris shows us his lack of understanding about what constitutes proper childcare by leaving the little creatures unattended. Showing that they aren't mature enough to be left alone for extended periods, the children [[Chris and sex|kiss]], watch TV shows meant for older audiences, ostracize Blake, and [[CWC Fighter|fight]] - Punchy even goes so far as to knock Wild out of a window, which could give Wild serious injuries.

This marks the first time Chris has actually done ''anything'' with his beloved Sonichu Characters since the [[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas|Christmas Special.]] Much to the [[Trolls|fans']] chagrin, Chris has decided to take all of his characters and turn them all into [[Sonee & Rosey|the most annoying part]] of the CWCVerse.

It should be noted that this is the first time a Sonee of Blake has appeared, casting him as [[wikipedia:Gonzo the Great|Gonzo]], despite the fact that there's nothing to compare the two together, much less the rest of the characters. Also note that Chris [[autism|has to describe Blake's personality in detail]].

Also worth mentioning is that ''Sonichu Babies'' was the name of one of the stories in [[Sonichu 3]], though it was an origin story for the Combo. Since the Chaotic Combo never met in the comics until they evolved, it's possible that this is not canon in the CWCVerse, or a complete retcon.

As a further testament to Chris's utter lack of imagination, the vignette featuring Young Rosechu and Young Sonichu features the same elements from his [[PlayingHouse|other short]] that was released the same day: The wife works as a journalist, while the husband stays at home and is supposed to take care of a crying and shitting baby but delegates the task to the older sibling.

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = SonichuBabies
| video = {{#ev:youtube|J3IuXNk5_LU}}
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other|text}} {{Sex|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}
| shirt = Unclear
| previous = [[A Workout]]
| next = [[PlayingHouse]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:Wittle Cute Sonees Page 1 by johaely.jpg|thumb|Sonichu babies!]]

''[Displays four crude drawings of members of the [[Chaotic Combo]] as babies, stuck to the end of what appear to be pens or straws]'' Dooweeoooh, [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]] babies, we make our dreams come truueee...

''<nowiki>[</nowiki>[[Wild Sonichu]] and Blake in shot]'' Sonichu babies, we'll do anything for youuu...

''<nowiki>[</nowiki>[[Sonichu (character)|Sonee]] and [[Rosechu|Rosee]] in shot]'' When your world was kinda weird and you wished that you were theeere... ''[As Rosee]'' Just close your eyes and make-believe, and you can be anywhere!

''[Drawing of a pair of human legs in shot]'' Is everything alright in here? ''[As all [[sonichus]]]'' Yes Mommy [Nanny?]!

''[Displays all drawings, dropping some]'' Sonichu Sonichu Sonichu Sonichu babies! Yaaay! Okay, let's beginning da show!

''[Sonee and Rosey]'' We're having fun today in d-in d-in da ''room'', aren't we! Y-Aren't we Rosey! Hehedat's right Sonee, we're having fun in here! Dat's why all these[?] [[Bubbles]], [[Punchy]], [[Magi-chan]], [[Angelica]], even [[Blake]]! ''[Shows other drawings, speaks as Blake]'' Hello. What? I'm the weird one. Compare me to Gonzo. I have [[niggos|black]] hair though. ''[Fumbles with sticks for a few seconds, removes all but Sonee and Rosey]'' Anyway, come with us, we're going to [?], whee! Whee, oh we're having fun, wheeeewheeee! Mm. Anywa-anywel-we're a... d-d-fun. What'd you wanna do now? I wanna do that thing like we saw on da [[TV]] show. That what ya wanna do? Yeaah! Alright! ''[Makes the baby siblings "kiss"]'' Mmmmmmm! Mmmmm!

''<nowiki>[</nowiki>[[Chris and writing|Exposition!Magi-chan]] moves into shot]'' What? Ever since they watched- they seen that kissing scene, on that episode of... The Young and the Restless... they been makin' out, all the time! They lot-ov-enjoying it. Lil' Sonee has been noted saying, "she tastes like applesauce"!

''[Disembodied legs return]'' Hey kids, I got' go out now. And mukku-my husband's comin' with me. ''[Comic Chris' trademark sneakers join]'' That's right. We're going out to go- we're going out shopping. We're gonna bring back some delicious groceries, and we'll be back in a lil' while. ''[Pause]'' Wait a minute. Who's gonna mind the babies? ''Oh yeah you're right. You stay home.'' Oh yeah you're right, I'll stay home, you go out to get the groceries. ''Look how we settled that!'' Well, we s- we're always able to settle things. Even und- even our minor disagreements. Look the way we still love each other. Mmm. ''[Pieces of paper "kiss"]'' Okay, see you later. ''[Female legs leave]''

Alright children, y'all s- y'all be carefull out here. I'm gonna keep the door op- I'm gonna keep the door open, you just uh, give me a shout if you uh, need anything. ''Okay Papa C!''

''[Bubbles and Wild]'' What's the matter, Wild? Iunno. Suddenly I just don't feel well. Well, and why is that? I- I was watchin' my- I was watchin' Blues Clues the other day, and, I missed a clue! You missed a clue? How'd you do that? You're- that guy was supposed to be able to detect da clues before that guy in the green shirt does! Yeah, what was that guy's name? Uhh... heck if I know! Mm. Well, anyway... I feel, a bit, I feel bad because I missed a clue! Dun worry about it, we all make mistakes. Yeah, you're right. We all do make mistakes. I guess I'll get over this someho- s-sometime. Yeah, you will. Hey, let's go play in the t- let's go play on the merry-go-round. Okay! Whee whee whee whee whee we'll go play onna merry-go round!

''[Pause, fumbling noises offscreen. Punchy enters.]'' [[wikipedia:Samurai Pizza Cats|Samurai Pizza Cats]]! Miaow miaow miaow miaow miaow! Samurai Pizza Cats! Miaowmiaowmiow miaow miaow! Samurai armour! Oh! A [[CWCville|communist]], huh? You [unintelligible]... C'mon sweetie, we're all doin' a TV show! Hey wait a sec [unintelligible] because I watchin' live television!

''[Replaced by Blake]'' Hyeah. Mm. I really like Bubbles. She's so pretty, she's so bubbly, she's so fun. I'm just- b- I'm just the weirdo here. I'm the one that gets... left out. It's not because I'm- it's not because of my colour, it's just because I have my own opinions beside from theirs. I do things for myself. Sultimes I like to r- sometimes I like to read, even though I don't know how to read yet! I'm different. I think for myself and things. I play too sometimes. Ba-suh-I bring danger along some-I bring danger with me sometimes, and... that makes me sad. You know. They can't apprec-me- appreciate me even though I'm young and danger... [gibberish] ''[Enter Sonee and Rosee]'' ''Wubuh listen de- listen to Blake over der? Keep on going on and on with his own self! It puzzles a gal[?].'' Yeah, well he's talkin' to himself, huh. Well I dunno. Seems kinda weird. ''[As Blake]'' Oh will you shut up! We all talk to ourselves at one time or another! ''Sorry Blake!'' Yeah, sorry dude! Aah, whatever.

''[Angelica]'' All the lovely things we r- I read in the bible. Lalalalalalalaa. Lovely things, inna bible. Good story. ''[Magi-chan]'' Mmm, what stories are you reading about there, Angelica? ''Oh, this one, I'm reading about Genesis. The story of Adam and Eve!'' Ah yes. And then the apple gets bitten. ''YOU SPOILED IT FOR ME!! [Pause] I suppose next you're gonna tell me who gets thrown out first.'' I won't, I'll just uh, give you respect, there. ''Thank you. [Pause] Oh no, Eve gets kicked out first? [Whine] Well, at least we women grew to power eventually.'' Yeah. ''[Awkward pause]'' ''Praaaise Jesus in all his lov- in all his... forgiveness for us, he died for our sins and everything.'' Yes, we are Christians. We go to church every Sunday. ''An' Nanny takes us!'' Yeah. And Chris comes with us too! He's a good Christian, yes he is. ''So what you wanna do now?'' Let's go play with Legos! ''Okay! Wheeee! We're gonna play with Legos!''

''[Long pause. Punchy and Bubbles come into view, before being hastily retracted. Chris mumbles to himself before replacing Bubbles with Wild Sonichu]'' Hey Wild, you wanna sparrin' [unintelligable]? Okay Punchy! ''[Punchy launches himself at Wild, falls over]'' Huh. Got me there. ''[Wild "hits" Punchy]'' Got me again. Well, I'm gonna get you now. PEWWWW! ''[Punchy flies into Wild, both go offscreen. Punchy returns alone]'' Oh, shoot. I knocked him out da window! Yo c'mon[?], come in back in da window! ''I'm really hurt! You had me lyin' in a bush!'' I'm sorry. ''[Awkward silence]'' Aah, it's okay. Just be careful to watch yer punches. [Unintelligible] punches if I wanna work[?] inside the nursery. ''Yeah.'' So, I'll do that. Because, violence is not always the answer to e- is not always the answer. So- ye- uh, self defence, it ''can'' be... the answer. ''I agree. I don't like being bullied. Me, I was- b- m- I was out there riding my... bicycle the other day, an' [[Clyde_Cash|bully]] comes up to me, and he, he g-steals the bicycle and he beats me up! What's wrong with that dude?'' D'ya want me to go beat him up? ''Nah, I just need to learn self defence.'' I'm gonna go find and beat him up. Hiyaaa!

''Ya don't even know what he looks like, where ya goin' Punchy? ...Anyway. [Turns around once, leaves]''

''[Punchy re-enters]'' Th-you can't beat me Punchy[?], I'm [[Random-access humor|comical]], knock knock, who's there, orange, orange who, orange you glad I didn't say banana? ''[Pause]'' What? ''[Pause]'' Oh well. Knock knock. Who's there. Uhh, hello? What d'you mean, "hello". Well you said "who's there". Dyeah knock knock joke? I say "knock knock", you say "who's there". What? I stayed up watching [[Officer Keino|Home Movies]] one night. Place- It's a funny cartoon show, Brendon Small[?]. Not recommended for children, though. It- still maybe teenagers. Or youth- or you- think it's a PG rating. TV-PG. ''[Jiggles around]'' I don't care I watched it by myself! I was up, I was wiry[?]! I thought you were asleep! ''[Is still for a second, before leaving somewhat abruptly.]''

''[Sonee and Rosee return]'' ''Okay so... What should we do now?'' I think let's go play House! ''Yeah let's go play House again!'' Yay! Doodoodoodooboodoodoo, hi honey I'm home. ''Oh, where've you been? Mmm, I mean, how was your day sweetheart?'' It's been good, y'know, I've just been, uh, doing business and everything. M-keepin' everything- keepin' the city safe with my swift speed and lightning attacks! ''Very good. I've been minding the children. Although when I went out, I wa- I was intercepted by one of the villains! But I- gre- myself at self defence, I struck them right back! And I stood my ground.'' ''[Pause]'' That's very good. How're the children. ''I think I just told you that.'' Oh yes you did! The children are good! Hey- okay- so- that was good, let's do role reversal. ''Okay!''

''[Switch places]'' ''Hi honey, I'm home!'' Oh hi honey, how was w- how was- how was your work at journalism? ''Oh, very good, I wrote- guh story here, and there. [Pause] The bank was robbed.'' There was a v- there was a bank robbery? ''Yeah, didn't you hear that? There was a horse and mane[????]!'' Horse and mane? ''Sure, the horse was on the main!'' [''Pause]'' What? Iunno. Go figure comedy. Anyway, [unintelligible], and I made, bulublugh, and I made, promotion!'' Very good. The children have been doi- have been doin' good today. I mean theyuh, the slow- I mean uh, the younger one [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|pooped all over the place]]. Ugh, that was a whole bunch to clean up. And, uh... and the older one missed the toilet! I didn't know what to do with that, 'cept to clean it up, and tell her that it was wrong to do it in that direction, not to [[Rosechu#Transgenderism|aim it this way]], that. So I've been cleanin' and cookin' and keeping house all day long. ''And I've been out journalism all day.'' Yeah. ''[Pause]'' Anyway uh, today was grocery shopping day so I went out for groceries. Sh- an' children ha- and children... went with me. I took them along with me. And, they were okay in the car for a little while but then there was a scr- then on the way home there was a screaming. Yeah, the younger one was tired. Just waawaawaawaawaa. Waaa. ''[Pause]'' So the older one kept- kept the younger one quiet, you know. At least she knew better. So, she calmed him down. ''That's good.'' I had to change a few diapers to- had to change a whole number of diapers for that little one. What a mess. But I'm willing to go through with it, because I am the father! The house husband. ''And I'm the one that goes out, make the money.'' Okay. So. Wanna end the show. ''Why not?'' The puppet show. Alright. Yeah. Sonichu babies! Yaaay! Dudududududuh!

''[Feet come back into view]'' Dududududududuh! Duh duh! ''Thank you very much, goodnight!'' Goodnight.

==See also==

*[[A Sonichu Day]]
*[[Sonichu 3]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[A Workout]]|nextlink=[[PlayingHouse]]}}
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

S-Chu Ball

2010-10-18T07:01:55Z

Baxter: ah, shit

[[Image:227-SchuBall.jpg|thumb|An S-Chu Ball]]
[[File:0658-ANIME513.JPG|thumb|Chris holding an S-Chu Ball while dressed as his comic counterpart.]]
[[File:226-SchuBall2.jpg|thumb|Pokémon TCG card]]
An '''S-Chu Ball''' is a special type of Poké Ball used for the capture and storage of [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon|Electric- or Hedgehog-type Pokémon]]. They receive very little mention in canon, as few of the Sonichus and Rosechus are ever stored in Balls. An S-Chu Ball appears in [[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]] and Chris claimed that [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] can be stored in them in the plot for his ''[[Family Guy]]'' episode: ''"Then I break out my two S-Chu Balls, toss them and release Sonichu and Rosechu; more greetings."''<ref>[http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Family_Guy#Story_of_the_CWC_Episode_for_.22Family_Guy.22]</ref> He also mentioned them in a phone call with [[Alec Benson Leary]].<ref>[[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 1]]</ref>

The S-Chu Balls are often confused with the [[Sonichu Balls]], which hold some relevance to the plot and have a completely different function. Any efforts to distinguish the two are probably too pedantic, as superficially they're the same anyway.

==References==
<references/>