CWCki - User contributions [en]

User:Big Fucking Whoopie

2010-05-15T18:44:37Z

Big Fucking Whoopie:

<div style="clear:right; float:right; width:358x;">
{{Australian}}</div>

=immediate to do list=
*Finish Mumble 9 transcript

=done=
*Second half of mumble 10 transcript
*Mumble chat 9.5

Talk:Mumble 9.5

2010-05-15T18:44:01Z

Big Fucking Whoopie:

Transcript =/= Summary.
I realize this is a long piece of audio, but we don't need two recaps --[[User:Megaman|''Super Fighting Robot Megaman!'' ]] [[Image:MegaManXRunning.gif]] 12:06, 27 July 2009 (CEST)
*I was about to say that :3. Seriously, let's get a real transcription going. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 20:17, 21 November 2009 (CET)

Put up the transcript up of the first 13 minutes of the chat. I'll do the rest some other time. God damn this recording was really shitty quality. Also I don't know the voices of any of the major players in the mumble chats so if someone could go through this one (and number 10 as well) and add names to my "Troll #". [[User:Big Fucking Whoopie|Big Fucking Whoopie]] 14:40, 26 April 2010 (UTC)

Ok I've finished the transcript. It's late and I couldn't be fucked proof reading and re checking it but I think it's all good. <strike>I also deleted the summary as we don't really need it now</strike> edit: Disregard that, I suck cocks etc. [[User:Big Fucking Whoopie|Big Fucking Whoopie]] 18:39, 15 May 2010 (UTC)

Mumble 9.5

2010-05-15T18:42:17Z

Big Fucking Whoopie:

'''Mumble 9.5''' is the continuation of the [[Mumble 9|ninth]] of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]].

==Summary==
[[Chris]] rejoins the [[Miscreants]] in chat. [[Clyde]] and the Miscreants again bombard Chris with accusations that he doesn't care about his [[Aunt Corina|Aunt Corina's]] death, and he's more sad that a funeral is ruining his birthday. The trolls again accuse Chris of [[List of Chris's games|wasting money on video games]] (with Clyde leveling the accusation that Chris and his family have spent more than $20,000 on games), and Chris offers little of substance in response.

Chris eventually storms out of the chat after being told he is afraid to go outside, and that leaving his [[14 Branchland Court|house]] for a change is the only way to get the Miscreants to leave him alone.

In one of the more famous Mumble moments, Chris admits that he may be "[[Autism|retarded]]" and that his mind doesn't think so quickly... making it obvious why he goes out of his way to mock "[[A Week With Christian Chandler#Page 6|slow-in-the-minds]]."

(00:00)
* The chat begins in the middle of a conversation between [[Clyde]] and [[Chris]].
* Clyde says Chris has improved nothing in his life.
(00:30)
* Chris says he has been thinking "very hard" about [[Wendy's|getting a job]], going to [[Julie]], and convincing [[Bob]] and [[Barb]] that Julie is real.
(01:00)
* Chris feels it is significant he is ready to spend "fifty to a hundred" dollars to go see Julie.
(02:00)
* Chris says the trolls do not realize how much stress he has because he must go to a funeral for his [[Aunt Corrina]] and that it is "happening on his birthday of all days."
* Clyde says Chris is more sad about his birthday than Aunt Corrina.
(02:30)
* Chris seems that he is crying over Aunt Corrina.
(03:00)
* Chris's blubbering suddenly improves and stops, indicating that it's likely bogus.
* Clyde tells trolls to let Chris cry.
(03:30)
* Chris says he is "possibly retarded," since his mind doesn't think so swift.
* Chris says he often doesn't even give thought to the actions he does.
(04:00)
* Hearing about the fire "made Chris so sad" and he "cried his heart out."
(05:00)
* Chris says love is like "standing on top of a mountain" and having "good wind" blow through your hair.
* People are to get to know each other through "pleasant conversation" and it is not all about the "bonus round."
(06:30)
* Chris says women should get to know men "[[gay|from the inside]]."
* Chris felt "true honest respect" from Julie, [[Blanca]], [[Sarah May]], [[Sarah Jackson]] and [[Panda]].
(08:00)
* Clyde says if he knew what true love was, Chris would know they were trolls. Chris says "trolls or not, I still care about them very much."
(08:30)
* Chris has got "some good memories" of those women.
(09:30)
* Chris claims he has learned from his mistakes and learned how to sort the "true from the false."
(10:30)
*Chris angrily responds to a question about Megan.
(11:00)
*Clyde asks whether Chris realizes why Megan left. After a pause, Chris says it is because he "got into her personal space" and "violated her drawing."
(12:00)
* Chris says he feels the [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|sexy drawing]] and sexy websites are "appropriate" and says "the eyes are censored and you can't recognize Megan."
(13:30)
* The trolls insult Chris and tell him they haven't slandered him- they've only posted his words.
* Chris claims he has been misinterpreted and has gone through "so many revolutions and personal upgrades for the better."
(14:30)
* Clyde says the Miscreants have estimated Chris has spent over [[list of Chris's games|$20,000 on video games in his life]].
(15:30)
* Chris blames the ED page for not getting a job.
(16:00)
* Clyde attacks Chris for misspending his tugboat. Chris says he spends his money by paying the bills, his rent, and credit cards.
(16:30)
* The trolls say there is no way Chris will ever support a family.
* Clyde accuses Chris of being $2000 behind in credit card debt.
(17:30)
* Clyde says the Miscreants can't be stopped, and Chris stops answering.
(19:00)
* Chris says he goes outside every day, but changes the subject.
* Chris says [[Max]] has said to pass on the message that Julie will be at HQ in ten minutes.
(19:30)
* Chris says '''"most everything I tell you is the truth."'''
(20:00)
* Chris angrily yells that he did not have the money or support to go see Miyamoto.
(20:30)
* Chris says he went out with Bob to get [[McDonald's|breakfast]], since Bob likes the company.
* Chris reads comic strips in newspapers.
(21:00)
* Clyde says Bob wants someone intelligent to talk to, but all he has is Chris.
* The trolls say Chris is a bad son, and his parents have spent a lot of money on him.
(21:30)
* The trolls say Chris should make his own decisions and not just do everything Bob and Barb want.
(22:00)
* Chris says he is "more likely to stick to a routine."
* Clyde says Chris will just keep going downhill.
* Chris's only response is to tell the trolls to "shut up," and he leaves the chat.
* The trolls discuss the next chance to troll Chris and what BlueSpike should do next.

==Transcript==

{{quote|Ahhh Jesus Christ|Chris, Once again showing us his devout Christian ways}}

'''Clyde''': We've given you so many chances to improve yourself, I've tried to help you 
'''Chris''': Clyde to your big question I didn't have my (something) on 
'''Clyde''': I've been trying to help you this entire time, but I've grown tired of you doing nothing 
'''Chris''': I have been doing something 
'''Clyde''': What have you done? 
'''Chris''': I have been making plans, I have been thinking very hard about getting a job and about going to Julie and convincing my family that she is, that she is a real woman. [''sigh'']I'm probably, I'm not lying, spending about 50 to 100 dollars of my own money just to try, just to try go up and visit her 
'''Clyde''': How much money? 
'''Chris''': 50 to 100 
'''Clyde''': That's not a lot. (Something). That's chump change in today's society. A long time ago one of our former former (something) Vivian (something) but anywayed to help you but you didn't listen 
'''Chris''': Well look I'm sorry. look I'm sorry about look I'm sorry about a lot of my past mistakes about not listening to everyone ok, but I've been under a lot of stress 
'''Clyde''': What is this stress? You always cite stress 
'''Chris''': Stress STRESS, Stress of the mean people that ha has give me such bad mark uh that have made a bad name and such 
'''Troll 1''': Chris you don't know what stress is, you don't have a job you don't go 
'''Chris''': [''interrupting''] I have a lot of stress in my life, my Aunt Corina and I have to go to her funeral and I'm going to be very sad that day and the funeral is happening on my birthday of all days 
'''Clyde''': Shouldn't you be more sad about her than your birthday? 
'''Chris''': I am very upset about my Aunt Corina, she was a very sweet woman 
'''Clyde''': But you seem to be complain about it being on your birthday 
'''Chris''': Look, stop talking about that ok. I love my [''Clyde butts in with a half formed sentence''] I feel sympathy for my Aunt Corina. She smoked and when she went to the hospital she died at age 75 her her her (something) deteriorated her left lung and her liver and her brain 
[''both Clyde and Chris go to speak''] 
'''Clyde''': Go ahead, sure, why not 
'''Chris''': and they kept her alive as long as they could, they could, till she breathed... her last breath 
[''chris pulls out an academy award wining performance of tears''] 
'''Chris''': [''between sobs and with a heavy heart''] We knew that she was dying (chris is too emotional here to make out what he is saying) and that we were able to say we loved her one last time, over the phone. [''sob''] 
'''Clyde''': well they did their best 
[''Trolls mock and imitate chris''] 
'''Clyde''': Silence, let him cry, let him cry. (something) but this does not excuse for all your other past actions. 
[''Chris has made a miraculous mental recovery from his emotional state''] 
'''Chris''': [''loud sigh''] look I'm unfit, I'm possibly retarded ok my mind doesn't think so swift. I I uh I'm likely even to make mistakes on the fly without realizing it. Sometimes I don't even give thought to something I've said (something) but I can give a lot of before when I move from, pe uh, move from, uh, move from Panda to Julie, because I though, I thought she had died in that fire. I was I uh my heart was petra uh about that possibility after I about that fire in Austra- uh post, It made me so sad [''sobs creep back into Chris's voice''] 
'''Clyde''': Now this I can't believe. I believe your Aunt Corina and I'm sorry for your loss but about Panda, NO 
'''Chris''': I cried my heart out 
'''Clyde''': and then you just moved on, just like that 
'''Chris''': NO, I uh, no I did not move on just like that 
'''Clyde''': But you claimed she was your love your love. You don't know what love feels like chris 
'''Chris''': I do know what love feels like 
'''Clyde''': What does it feel like then chris? Can you describe it? 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] it's... uh [''sigh''] it's indescribable, it's a priceless feeling, it's like you know you feel most elated, it's like your standing on top of a mountain with the wind blowing through your hair and it's a good wind. It's just uh love feels so good. True love feels so good especially when it uh comes between two people who have known each other for a long while and have got to know each other through pleasant conversation. And uh you know the bonus rounds are there too I mean I'll admit that but what I enjoy most are the pleasant conversations and learning about the kind sweet uh kind sweet women that they are [''sigh''] and that they care me and respect me very much and it just makes me feel so much better to know that I'm respected by the women. Because I felt, because it's like I don't get a lot of respect from people, from bad people like y'all being mean like right now. And this is just [''tears welling and emotion rising''] is making me want to cry. 
'''Clyde''': You said the women. are you talking about a singular person or all women? 
[''once again chris has composed himself amazingly well''] 
'''Chris''': No, no I said women, women 
'''Clyde''': You mean you want to be respected by everyone? All the women. You want to love them all? 
'''Chris''': No 
'''Clyde''': or is it down to one person? 
'''Chris''': No uh wait. Now your twisting my words around 
'''Clyde''': I'm just saying whatever you say 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] Look I could uh, its a, look when I talk about the respect from a woman I'm talking about honest respect like after she's got to know me from the inside like uh most women should get to know their man, before they go have a relationship with them or or whatever. And if Julie just, you know between Blanca and Sarah Jackson and Panda, Sarah May and Julie. I was very happy that day when I felt such respect when I felt the true honest respect of them. And there's noth- you know uh you know I'm sorry to have forgot to have mentioned Sarah May when I mentioned Julie (something) when I was asked a question about naming friends. I'll admit I'll admit I was wrong. I was wrong I was wrong and I thank Julie very I mean Sarah Mayver, damn it, I did it again. I got mixed up. You, Y'all mixed it up when you mixed up my emotions because I'm upset all this. Anyways anyways Aunt then got to the hospital and I felt so sorry for 
'''Clyde''': No need, no need for lies to keep up the false stories. They are all trolls. They are all trolls. Chris have I not got this through your head. Panda is sleeping right now if you could be more quiet. Sarah May is perfectly fine. Blanca, Blanca well I don't know where she's off to, the other two people behind Blanca I don't know and Sarah Jackson is still alive. They are all trolls chris. It's because you don't know what true love is 
'''Chris''': I know what true love is 
'''Clyde''': If you knew what true love was then you would realize that they were trolls 
'''Troll 7''': Yep 
'''Chris''': Look, trolls, look, trollers or not I still cared about them very much 
'''Clyde''': What? 
'''Chris''': Trollers or not I still cared about them very much 
'''Troll 3''': you're just bullshitting 
'''Chris''': And I and I I got so, I got so many good memories of them. Some bad sure and some even bad but good 
'''Female troll''': Chris all those memories are false 
'''Troll 2''': You deluded pig 
[''two people speak at once''] 
'''Troll 1''': every scenario, all us 
'''Clyde''': We were behind it all 
'''Chris''': look I know y'all, I know y'all are feeding me lies right now 
[''huge reaction to this, everyone talks over each other''] 
'''Clyde''': You still believe that they were not trolling, this is the thing. Really? Even after Blanca destroyed your medallion, after Panda sudden mysteriously disappeared when she doesn't even live in that part of Australia, well not any more she doesn't, but anyway. You still believe it 
'''Troll 4''': You are stupid chris. You do not learn from your mistakes 
'''Chris''': Look [''sigh''] I do learn from my, I have learnt from my mistakes 
[''several people speak''] 
'''Chris''': I have learnt to take so many bullets and lies that were aimed directly at me, I learnt to take them like uh, like (something) in the wind. Just let them fly by. let them fly by. I have learnt to sort the truth from the false. Panada true, definite true, definitely comes from the woman, from the people themselves 
'''Clyde''': Why would you see through that one (something) Julie after Sarah May and Panda. Urgh, I'm disgusted by that. But we'll make sure she never meets you 
'''Troll 5''': Anyway 
'''Chris''': Look y'all are just, look y'all are just trying to make me feel bad because I have, because I have been delayed, because I was delayed in drawing comics as often as I should be 
[''eruption of sarcastic "oh yeah"s''] 
'''Troll 2''': You idiot, this isn't about the comics 
'''Troll 6''': How's Megan by the way? 
'''Chris''': I DON'T KNOW I haven't seen her in a long time. 
'''Troll 6''': I wonder why 
'''Clyde''': Silence Silence, Ok, I want to ask you one last thing, well not one last thing but a useful thing. Why do you think Megan left you? Can you think why now? I think I've asked you this before 
'''Chris''': I can only think because I got too much in her personal space and I violate her with the drawing 
'''Clyde''': That was probably your only chance for true happiness and you screwed that up, and you're still doing it time and time again 
'''Troll 7''': Yo that drawing's fucked up yo 
'''Clyde''': And you still manage to post it up on your website. Why? 
'''Chris''': I don't... [''sigh''] 
'''Troll 6''': Clyde's correct Chris 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] It's a sexy drawing and it's a sexy website and I thought it was appropriate. 
[''several people respond''] 
'''Chris''': Besides in the drawing the eyes are censored out, it's not like you can recognize the woman 
'''Clyde''': Censorship does nothing once you've admitted it Chris. 
[''trolls agree with Clyde's sentiment''] 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] 
'''Troll 6''': And besides we thought that was your sister for the longest time 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] [''whispering''] Jesus, Jesus 
'''Troll 8''': I thought that was a better theory actually 
'''Chris''': Ahhh Jesus Christ 
'''Troll 6''': Maybe you shouldn't have said anything Chris? 
'''Chris''': Maybe not but y'all didn't have to twist my words round on everything make up all these dang stupid false slanderous theories and what not 
'''Troll 7''': Dude yo that's bullshit 
[''trolls disagree with Chris's sentiment''] 
'''Troll 1''': We're just going off what you've told us 
'''Troll 8''': Exactly 
'''Clyde''': [Unclear] What did you expect would happen? 
'''Troll 2''': You lowlife. I hope you bleed in slanderous hell 
'''Troll 1''': We've never slandered anyone. We just take what you've said and post it for people's interpretations 
'''Chris''': That's my point, you've misinterpret me 
'''Clyde''': Well you're going to have to correct yourself one day, you have to (unclear) 
'''Chris''': I have been correcting myself, every day from the lessons I've learned and the mistakes I've realised I've made 
'''Troll 8''': really? 
'''Chris''': I've gone through so many self revalations and uh,and uh,and personal upgrades for the better 
'''Troll 7''': Like yo PSP 
[''trolls laugh''] 
'''Chris''': Forget about the friggin games systems 
'''Clyde''': Surprising from a man who spends over a thousand dollars on it. You see chris you have a problem. You need to stop buying video games, you need to sell them all. They're no good, they're not helping you 
'''Troll 1''': It's only when you lose everything that you're free to do anything 
'''Troll 8''': The man speaks the truth 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] 
'''Clyde''': You have, We have estimated you have over twenty thousand US dollars worth of video games, all at some points of your life. Why would you spend so much 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] Well I started from childhood, I was brought up, I was brought up with video games. I started with a commodore 64, when it was brand new. Just saying. 
'''Troll''': Chris that is not a valid excuse 
'''Chris''': It's the truth 
'''Troll''': That doesn't make it valid 
'''Clyde''': Chris let me ask you this. How many of the games that you've owned in your lifetime have you actually completed? 
'''Chris''': I have beaten the vast majority of them. I have beat most every sonic the hedgehog game I own. 
'''Clyde''': If you have that much free time on your hands maybe you should get a job 
'''Chris''': Hey you know what, for one thing I would get a job, but you know they would punch my name on the internet, they would find that damn ED page and then 
[''trolls all speak''] 
'''Clyde''': Ok ok, yes you're right, you're right. We have slandered you, well we haven't slandered you. It's only the truth, the truth. I had to say slandered because you say that so much, but anyay. Ok lets say you just did have your own eight hundred dollar uhh, whatever you call it, tugboat, which is a stupid name. It's a government check. You have your eight hundred dollars to spend and how do you spend that? 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] I got uh, I pay my, I pay my, I pay my family's bills, I give them a monthly rent, I pay my credit card bills 
'''Clyde''': But then you still (unclear). 
'''Troll 1''': You're right, chris probably could not get a job but he can not also support himself on his tugboat. So [''loud typing noise''] he can't support his family anyway. too bad 
'''Troll 7''': Yo I can hear that typing, What's with that? 
'''Clyde''': I know that you've revealed that to date you have credit card debts, you're already two thousand dollars behind. How do you expect to raise a family? How do you expect to help Julie? 
'''Chris''': uhh [''more loud typing''] 
'''Troll 5''': Ignoring the question I see 
'''Chris''': No 
'''Clyde''': Look, if you go onto your youtube, beg your fans to bring down us the Miscreants, but you know, your combined powers can not stop us. Nothing can stop us 
'''Troll 8''': Every time we get knocked down we'll get right back up again 
'''Troll 10''': and you'll never keep us down 
'''Troll 11''': and everything that you have typed is through no one's fault but your own. You have, Youhave to reap what you have sown chris 
'''Troll 1''': the best thing you can do is you know, go back out into the real world with your sign, you know. Wouldn't that be, just like old days? You wouldn't have the internet trolls all over you. You just go outside 
'''Chris''': [sigh] 
[''rapid fire error noise''] 
[''more loud typing''] 
'''Troll 1''': What are you afraid on the sun? 
[''trolls all talk at once''] 
'''Chris''': I am not, I am not afraid 
'''Clyde''': (unclear) then why have you not, you know, uhhh I don't know. When's the last time you've been outside chris? 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] I've been outside, I go outside every day 
[Clyde says something, phone ringing] 
'''Chris''': I enjoy the air, anyway look, max wants me to tell you that uhh, Julie will be at HQ in ten minutes 
''Troll'': (unclear) 
'''Clyde''': (unclear)I meanenjpy the air? I doubt it. I honestly think you're lying chris again? 
[''more load typing''] 
'''Chris''': I am not lying to you! Ev- most everything I tell you is the truth and if I make uh I if I make a certain, if I say the wrong things its because I didn't know better at the time 
'''Clyde''': What do you mean you don't know better? You don't know what the truth and what the uh, flase is? 
'''Troll 5''': You can't tell right from wrong? 
'''Troll 8''': You lied to everyone when you said you were going to (unclear) 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] Because they, because, because they were, because they were big time theories and my families wouldn't support me, I DID NOT HAVE THE MONEY TO MAKE A TRIP 
'''Troll 8''': So why lie to us 
'''Troll 12''': My my aren't we a suffering joe 
'''Troll 8''': stuttering stanley, stuttering stanley 
'''Clyde''': Ok we don't need stupid insults, we need real insults, you know. I mean chris, again, last time you've been outside. Detail it for us. Don't just say you just went out for air, that's a lie 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] I went out with my father this morning for one thing, to go get, to go get breakfast. 
'''Clyde''': Where? I'd like to know 
'''Chris''': And plus, and plus, plus he likes the comapny he takes the newspaer with him. I read the comics and he reads evry- uh he reads the rest 
'''Troll 7''': [''laughs''] comics 
'''Clyde''': You know I feel kind of bad for your father. All he wants is someone you know, intellignet to talk with but all he has is you 
'''Chris''': He has my mother to 
'''Clyde''': Well that to but someone of a male comradery, someone who can (unclear). You're not a very good son I take it 
'''Chris''': I AM A GOOD SON and they have raised me very hard and they have spent a lot of moeny on me and I love them very much and appreciate them very much for that 
'''Troll 13''': Almost too much. You seem to value their input more than you actually should. You are 26 years old, you are technically an adult but uhh- 
'''Chris''': Yeah but, it's not like, it's not like uhh. Look I have emotions and feelings and I uh I'm I'm more likely to stick to a routine and in order for me to make a big change I had to end upgiving it a lot of thought first 
'''Clyde''': Look Chris, this is the sad sad truth. You are going to grow up and die alone. I'm sorry to tell you this. 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] Look leave me, just just shut up and leave me alone, leave me alone 
'''Clyde''': We tried to help y- 
'''Chris''': [''interrupting''] Leave my love life alone 
'''Clyde''': Whatever 
[''Chris seems to be reduced to tears and leaves, trolls all speak''] 

{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 9|Mumble Chat 9]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 10|Mumble Chat 10]]|}}

==Links==
[http://www.mediafire.com/?d1igtymai3y Download]

{{FanChats}}
[[Category:Mumble chats]]

Talk:Mumble 9.5

2010-05-15T18:39:01Z

Big Fucking Whoopie:

Transcript =/= Summary.
I realize this is a long piece of audio, but we don't need two recaps --[[User:Megaman|''Super Fighting Robot Megaman!'' ]] [[Image:MegaManXRunning.gif]] 12:06, 27 July 2009 (CEST)
*I was about to say that :3. Seriously, let's get a real transcription going. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 20:17, 21 November 2009 (CET)

Put up the transcript up of the first 13 minutes of the chat. I'll do the rest some other time. God damn this recording was really shitty quality. Also I don't know the voices of any of the major players in the mumble chats so if someone could go through this one (and number 10 as well) and add names to my "Troll #". [[User:Big Fucking Whoopie|Big Fucking Whoopie]] 14:40, 26 April 2010 (UTC)

Ok I've finished the transcript. It's late and I couldn't be fucked proof reading and re checking it but I think it's all good. I also deleted the summary as we don't really need it now [[User:Big Fucking Whoopie|Big Fucking Whoopie]] 18:39, 15 May 2010 (UTC)

Mumble 9.5

2010-05-15T18:35:47Z

Big Fucking Whoopie: removed summary

'''Mumble 9.5''' is the continuation of the [[Mumble 9|ninth]] of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]].

==Transcript==

{{quote|Ahhh Jesus Christ|Chris, Once again showing us his devout Christian ways}}

'''Clyde''': We've given you so many chances to improve yourself, I've tried to help you 
'''Chris''': Clyde to your big question I didn't have my (something) on 
'''Clyde''': I've been trying to help you this entire time, but I've grown tired of you doing nothing 
'''Chris''': I have been doing something 
'''Clyde''': What have you done? 
'''Chris''': I have been making plans, I have been thinking very hard about getting a job and about going to Julie and convincing my family that she is, that she is a real woman. [''sigh'']I'm probably, I'm not lying, spending about 50 to 100 dollars of my own money just to try, just to try go up and visit her 
'''Clyde''': How much money? 
'''Chris''': 50 to 100 
'''Clyde''': That's not a lot. (Something). That's chump change in today's society. A long time ago one of our former former (something) Vivian (something) but anywayed to help you but you didn't listen 
'''Chris''': Well look I'm sorry. look I'm sorry about look I'm sorry about a lot of my past mistakes about not listening to everyone ok, but I've been under a lot of stress 
'''Clyde''': What is this stress? You always cite stress 
'''Chris''': Stress STRESS, Stress of the mean people that ha has give me such bad mark uh that have made a bad name and such 
'''Troll 1''': Chris you don't know what stress is, you don't have a job you don't go 
'''Chris''': [''interrupting''] I have a lot of stress in my life, my Aunt Corina and I have to go to her funeral and I'm going to be very sad that day and the funeral is happening on my birthday of all days 
'''Clyde''': Shouldn't you be more sad about her than your birthday? 
'''Chris''': I am very upset about my Aunt Corina, she was a very sweet woman 
'''Clyde''': But you seem to be complain about it being on your birthday 
'''Chris''': Look, stop talking about that ok. I love my [''Clyde butts in with a half formed sentence''] I feel sympathy for my Aunt Corina. She smoked and when she went to the hospital she died at age 75 her her her (something) deteriorated her left lung and her liver and her brain 
[''both Clyde and Chris go to speak''] 
'''Clyde''': Go ahead, sure, why not 
'''Chris''': and they kept her alive as long as they could, they could, till she breathed... her last breath 
[''chris pulls out an academy award wining performance of tears''] 
'''Chris''': [''between sobs and with a heavy heart''] We knew that she was dying (chris is too emotional here to make out what he is saying) and that we were able to say we loved her one last time, over the phone. [''sob''] 
'''Clyde''': well they did their best 
[''Trolls mock and imitate chris''] 
'''Clyde''': Silence, let him cry, let him cry. (something) but this does not excuse for all your other past actions. 
[''Chris has made a miraculous mental recovery from his emotional state''] 
'''Chris''': [''loud sigh''] look I'm unfit, I'm possibly retarded ok my mind doesn't think so swift. I I uh I'm likely even to make mistakes on the fly without realizing it. Sometimes I don't even give thought to something I've said (something) but I can give a lot of before when I move from, pe uh, move from, uh, move from Panda to Julie, because I though, I thought she had died in that fire. I was I uh my heart was petra uh about that possibility after I about that fire in Austra- uh post, It made me so sad [''sobs creep back into Chris's voice''] 
'''Clyde''': Now this I can't believe. I believe your Aunt Corina and I'm sorry for your loss but about Panda, NO 
'''Chris''': I cried my heart out 
'''Clyde''': and then you just moved on, just like that 
'''Chris''': NO, I uh, no I did not move on just like that 
'''Clyde''': But you claimed she was your love your love. You don't know what love feels like chris 
'''Chris''': I do know what love feels like 
'''Clyde''': What does it feel like then chris? Can you describe it? 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] it's... uh [''sigh''] it's indescribable, it's a priceless feeling, it's like you know you feel most elated, it's like your standing on top of a mountain with the wind blowing through your hair and it's a good wind. It's just uh love feels so good. True love feels so good especially when it uh comes between two people who have known each other for a long while and have got to know each other through pleasant conversation. And uh you know the bonus rounds are there too I mean I'll admit that but what I enjoy most are the pleasant conversations and learning about the kind sweet uh kind sweet women that they are [''sigh''] and that they care me and respect me very much and it just makes me feel so much better to know that I'm respected by the women. Because I felt, because it's like I don't get a lot of respect from people, from bad people like y'all being mean like right now. And this is just [''tears welling and emotion rising''] is making me want to cry. 
'''Clyde''': You said the women. are you talking about a singular person or all women? 
[''once again chris has composed himself amazingly well''] 
'''Chris''': No, no I said women, women 
'''Clyde''': You mean you want to be respected by everyone? All the women. You want to love them all? 
'''Chris''': No 
'''Clyde''': or is it down to one person? 
'''Chris''': No uh wait. Now your twisting my words around 
'''Clyde''': I'm just saying whatever you say 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] Look I could uh, its a, look when I talk about the respect from a woman I'm talking about honest respect like after she's got to know me from the inside like uh most women should get to know their man, before they go have a relationship with them or or whatever. And if Julie just, you know between Blanca and Sarah Jackson and Panda, Sarah May and Julie. I was very happy that day when I felt such respect when I felt the true honest respect of them. And there's noth- you know uh you know I'm sorry to have forgot to have mentioned Sarah May when I mentioned Julie (something) when I was asked a question about naming friends. I'll admit I'll admit I was wrong. I was wrong I was wrong and I thank Julie very I mean Sarah Mayver, damn it, I did it again. I got mixed up. You, Y'all mixed it up when you mixed up my emotions because I'm upset all this. Anyways anyways Aunt then got to the hospital and I felt so sorry for 
'''Clyde''': No need, no need for lies to keep up the false stories. They are all trolls. They are all trolls. Chris have I not got this through your head. Panda is sleeping right now if you could be more quiet. Sarah May is perfectly fine. Blanca, Blanca well I don't know where she's off to, the other two people behind Blanca I don't know and Sarah Jackson is still alive. They are all trolls chris. It's because you don't know what true love is 
'''Chris''': I know what true love is 
'''Clyde''': If you knew what true love was then you would realize that they were trolls 
'''Troll 7''': Yep 
'''Chris''': Look, trolls, look, trollers or not I still cared about them very much 
'''Clyde''': What? 
'''Chris''': Trollers or not I still cared about them very much 
'''Troll 3''': you're just bullshitting 
'''Chris''': And I and I I got so, I got so many good memories of them. Some bad sure and some even bad but good 
'''Female troll''': Chris all those memories are false 
'''Troll 2''': You deluded pig 
[''two people speak at once''] 
'''Troll 1''': every scenario, all us 
'''Clyde''': We were behind it all 
'''Chris''': look I know y'all, I know y'all are feeding me lies right now 
[''huge reaction to this, everyone talks over each other''] 
'''Clyde''': You still believe that they were not trolling, this is the thing. Really? Even after Blanca destroyed your medallion, after Panda sudden mysteriously disappeared when she doesn't even live in that part of Australia, well not any more she doesn't, but anyway. You still believe it 
'''Troll 4''': You are stupid chris. You do not learn from your mistakes 
'''Chris''': Look [''sigh''] I do learn from my, I have learnt from my mistakes 
[''several people speak''] 
'''Chris''': I have learnt to take so many bullets and lies that were aimed directly at me, I learnt to take them like uh, like (something) in the wind. Just let them fly by. let them fly by. I have learnt to sort the truth from the false. Panada true, definite true, definitely comes from the woman, from the people themselves 
'''Clyde''': Why would you see through that one (something) Julie after Sarah May and Panda. Urgh, I'm disgusted by that. But we'll make sure she never meets you 
'''Troll 5''': Anyway 
'''Chris''': Look y'all are just, look y'all are just trying to make me feel bad because I have, because I have been delayed, because I was delayed in drawing comics as often as I should be 
[''eruption of sarcastic "oh yeah"s''] 
'''Troll 2''': You idiot, this isn't about the comics 
'''Troll 6''': How's Megan by the way? 
'''Chris''': I DON'T KNOW I haven't seen her in a long time. 
'''Troll 6''': I wonder why 
'''Clyde''': Silence Silence, Ok, I want to ask you one last thing, well not one last thing but a useful thing. Why do you think Megan left you? Can you think why now? I think I've asked you this before 
'''Chris''': I can only think because I got too much in her personal space and I violate her with the drawing 
'''Clyde''': That was probably your only chance for true happiness and you screwed that up, and you're still doing it time and time again 
'''Troll 7''': Yo that drawing's fucked up yo 
'''Clyde''': And you still manage to post it up on your website. Why? 
'''Chris''': I don't... [''sigh''] 
'''Troll 6''': Clyde's correct Chris 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] It's a sexy drawing and it's a sexy website and I thought it was appropriate. 
[''several people respond''] 
'''Chris''': Besides in the drawing the eyes are censored out, it's not like you can recognize the woman 
'''Clyde''': Censorship does nothing once you've admitted it Chris. 
[''trolls agree with Clyde's sentiment''] 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] 
'''Troll 6''': And besides we thought that was your sister for the longest time 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] [''whispering''] Jesus, Jesus 
'''Troll 8''': I thought that was a better theory actually 
'''Chris''': Ahhh Jesus Christ 
'''Troll 6''': Maybe you shouldn't have said anything Chris? 
'''Chris''': Maybe not but y'all didn't have to twist my words round on everything make up all these dang stupid false slanderous theories and what not 
'''Troll 7''': Dude yo that's bullshit 
[''trolls disagree with Chris's sentiment''] 
'''Troll 1''': We're just going off what you've told us 
'''Troll 8''': Exactly 
'''Clyde''': [Unclear] What did you expect would happen? 
'''Troll 2''': You lowlife. I hope you bleed in slanderous hell 
'''Troll 1''': We've never slandered anyone. We just take what you've said and post it for people's interpretations 
'''Chris''': That's my point, you've misinterpret me 
'''Clyde''': Well you're going to have to correct yourself one day, you have to (unclear) 
'''Chris''': I have been correcting myself, every day from the lessons I've learned and the mistakes I've realised I've made 
'''Troll 8''': really? 
'''Chris''': I've gone through so many self revalations and uh,and uh,and personal upgrades for the better 
'''Troll 7''': Like yo PSP 
[''trolls laugh''] 
'''Chris''': Forget about the friggin games systems 
'''Clyde''': Surprising from a man who spends over a thousand dollars on it. You see chris you have a problem. You need to stop buying video games, you need to sell them all. They're no good, they're not helping you 
'''Troll 1''': It's only when you lose everything that you're free to do anything 
'''Troll 8''': The man speaks the truth 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] 
'''Clyde''': You have, We have estimated you have over twenty thousand US dollars worth of video games, all at some points of your life. Why would you spend so much 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] Well I started from childhood, I was brought up, I was brought up with video games. I started with a commodore 64, when it was brand new. Just saying. 
'''Troll''': Chris that is not a valid excuse 
'''Chris''': It's the truth 
'''Troll''': That doesn't make it valid 
'''Clyde''': Chris let me ask you this. How many of the games that you've owned in your lifetime have you actually completed? 
'''Chris''': I have beaten the vast majority of them. I have beat most every sonic the hedgehog game I own. 
'''Clyde''': If you have that much free time on your hands maybe you should get a job 
'''Chris''': Hey you know what, for one thing I would get a job, but you know they would punch my name on the internet, they would find that damn ED page and then 
[''trolls all speak''] 
'''Clyde''': Ok ok, yes you're right, you're right. We have slandered you, well we haven't slandered you. It's only the truth, the truth. I had to say slandered because you say that so much, but anyay. Ok lets say you just did have your own eight hundred dollar uhh, whatever you call it, tugboat, which is a stupid name. It's a government check. You have your eight hundred dollars to spend and how do you spend that? 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] I got uh, I pay my, I pay my, I pay my family's bills, I give them a monthly rent, I pay my credit card bills 
'''Clyde''': But then you still (unclear). 
'''Troll 1''': You're right, chris probably could not get a job but he can not also support himself on his tugboat. So [''loud typing noise''] he can't support his family anyway. too bad 
'''Troll 7''': Yo I can hear that typing, What's with that? 
'''Clyde''': I know that you've revealed that to date you have credit card debts, you're already two thousand dollars behind. How do you expect to raise a family? How do you expect to help Julie? 
'''Chris''': uhh [''more loud typing''] 
'''Troll 5''': Ignoring the question I see 
'''Chris''': No 
'''Clyde''': Look, if you go onto your youtube, beg your fans to bring down us the Miscreants, but you know, your combined powers can not stop us. Nothing can stop us 
'''Troll 8''': Every time we get knocked down we'll get right back up again 
'''Troll 10''': and you'll never keep us down 
'''Troll 11''': and everything that you have typed is through no one's fault but your own. You have, Youhave to reap what you have sown chris 
'''Troll 1''': the best thing you can do is you know, go back out into the real world with your sign, you know. Wouldn't that be, just like old days? You wouldn't have the internet trolls all over you. You just go outside 
'''Chris''': [sigh] 
[''rapid fire error noise''] 
[''more loud typing''] 
'''Troll 1''': What are you afraid on the sun? 
[''trolls all talk at once''] 
'''Chris''': I am not, I am not afraid 
'''Clyde''': (unclear) then why have you not, you know, uhhh I don't know. When's the last time you've been outside chris? 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] I've been outside, I go outside every day 
[Clyde says something, phone ringing] 
'''Chris''': I enjoy the air, anyway look, max wants me to tell you that uhh, Julie will be at HQ in ten minutes 
''Troll'': (unclear) 
'''Clyde''': (unclear)I meanenjpy the air? I doubt it. I honestly think you're lying chris again? 
[''more load typing''] 
'''Chris''': I am not lying to you! Ev- most everything I tell you is the truth and if I make uh I if I make a certain, if I say the wrong things its because I didn't know better at the time 
'''Clyde''': What do you mean you don't know better? You don't know what the truth and what the uh, flase is? 
'''Troll 5''': You can't tell right from wrong? 
'''Troll 8''': You lied to everyone when you said you were going to (unclear) 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] Because they, because, because they were, because they were big time theories and my families wouldn't support me, I DID NOT HAVE THE MONEY TO MAKE A TRIP 
'''Troll 8''': So why lie to us 
'''Troll 12''': My my aren't we a suffering joe 
'''Troll 8''': stuttering stanley, stuttering stanley 
'''Clyde''': Ok we don't need stupid insults, we need real insults, you know. I mean chris, again, last time you've been outside. Detail it for us. Don't just say you just went out for air, that's a lie 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] I went out with my father this morning for one thing, to go get, to go get breakfast. 
'''Clyde''': Where? I'd like to know 
'''Chris''': And plus, and plus, plus he likes the comapny he takes the newspaer with him. I read the comics and he reads evry- uh he reads the rest 
'''Troll 7''': [''laughs''] comics 
'''Clyde''': You know I feel kind of bad for your father. All he wants is someone you know, intellignet to talk with but all he has is you 
'''Chris''': He has my mother to 
'''Clyde''': Well that to but someone of a male comradery, someone who can (unclear). You're not a very good son I take it 
'''Chris''': I AM A GOOD SON and they have raised me very hard and they have spent a lot of moeny on me and I love them very much and appreciate them very much for that 
'''Troll 13''': Almost too much. You seem to value their input more than you actually should. You are 26 years old, you are technically an adult but uhh- 
'''Chris''': Yeah but, it's not like, it's not like uhh. Look I have emotions and feelings and I uh I'm I'm more likely to stick to a routine and in order for me to make a big change I had to end upgiving it a lot of thought first 
'''Clyde''': Look Chris, this is the sad sad truth. You are going to grow up and die alone. I'm sorry to tell you this. 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] Look leave me, just just shut up and leave me alone, leave me alone 
'''Clyde''': We tried to help y- 
'''Chris''': [''interrupting''] Leave my love life alone 
'''Clyde''': Whatever 
[''Chris seems to be reduced to tears and leaves, trolls all speak''] 

{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 9|Mumble Chat 9]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 10|Mumble Chat 10]]|}}

==Links==
[http://www.mediafire.com/?d1igtymai3y Download]

{{FanChats}}
[[Category:Mumble chats]]

Mumble 9.5

2010-05-15T18:33:55Z

Big Fucking Whoopie:

'''Mumble 9.5''' is the continuation of the [[Mumble 9|ninth]] of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]].

==Summary==
[[Chris]] rejoins the [[Miscreants]] in chat. [[Clyde]] and the Miscreants again bombard Chris with accusations that he doesn't care about his [[Aunt Corina|Aunt Corina's]] death, and he's more sad that a funeral is ruining his birthday. The trolls again accuse Chris of [[List of Chris's games|wasting money on video games]] (with Clyde leveling the accusation that Chris and his family have spent more than $20,000 on games), and Chris offers little of substance in response.

Chris eventually storms out of the chat after being told he is afraid to go outside, and that leaving his [[14 Branchland Court|house]] for a change is the only way to get the Miscreants to leave him alone.

In one of the more famous Mumble moments, Chris admits that he may be "[[Autism|retarded]]" and that his mind doesn't think so quickly... making it obvious why he goes out of his way to mock "[[A Week With Christian Chandler#Page 6|slow-in-the-minds]]."

(00:00)
* The chat begins in the middle of a conversation between [[Clyde]] and [[Chris]].
* Clyde says Chris has improved nothing in his life.
(00:30)
* Chris says he has been thinking "very hard" about [[Wendy's|getting a job]], going to [[Julie]], and convincing [[Bob]] and [[Barb]] that Julie is real.
(01:00)
* Chris feels it is significant he is ready to spend "fifty to a hundred" dollars to go see Julie.
(02:00)
* Chris says the trolls do not realize how much stress he has because he must go to a funeral for his [[Aunt Corrina]] and that it is "happening on his birthday of all days."
* Clyde says Chris is more sad about his birthday than Aunt Corrina.
(02:30)
* Chris seems that he is crying over Aunt Corrina.
(03:00)
* Chris's blubbering suddenly improves and stops, indicating that it's likely bogus.
* Clyde tells trolls to let Chris cry.
(03:30)
* Chris says he is "possibly retarded," since his mind doesn't think so swift.
* Chris says he often doesn't even give thought to the actions he does.
(04:00)
* Hearing about the fire "made Chris so sad" and he "cried his heart out."
(05:00)
* Chris says love is like "standing on top of a mountain" and having "good wind" blow through your hair.
* People are to get to know each other through "pleasant conversation" and it is not all about the "bonus round."
(06:30)
* Chris says women should get to know men "[[gay|from the inside]]."
* Chris felt "true honest respect" from Julie, [[Blanca]], [[Sarah May]], [[Sarah Jackson]] and [[Panda]].
(08:00)
* Clyde says if he knew what true love was, Chris would know they were trolls. Chris says "trolls or not, I still care about them very much."
(08:30)
* Chris has got "some good memories" of those women.
(09:30)
* Chris claims he has learned from his mistakes and learned how to sort the "true from the false."
(10:30)
*Chris angrily responds to a question about Megan.
(11:00)
*Clyde asks whether Chris realizes why Megan left. After a pause, Chris says it is because he "got into her personal space" and "violated her drawing."
(12:00)
* Chris says he feels the [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|sexy drawing]] and sexy websites are "appropriate" and says "the eyes are censored and you can't recognize Megan."
(13:30)
* The trolls insult Chris and tell him they haven't slandered him- they've only posted his words.
* Chris claims he has been misinterpreted and has gone through "so many revolutions and personal upgrades for the better."
(14:30)
* Clyde says the Miscreants have estimated Chris has spent over [[list of Chris's games|$20,000 on video games in his life]].
(15:30)
* Chris blames the ED page for not getting a job.
(16:00)
* Clyde attacks Chris for misspending his tugboat. Chris says he spends his money by paying the bills, his rent, and credit cards.
(16:30)
* The trolls say there is no way Chris will ever support a family.
* Clyde accuses Chris of being $2000 behind in credit card debt.
(17:30)
* Clyde says the Miscreants can't be stopped, and Chris stops answering.
(19:00)
* Chris says he goes outside every day, but changes the subject.
* Chris says [[Max]] has said to pass on the message that Julie will be at HQ in ten minutes.
(19:30)
* Chris says '''"most everything I tell you is the truth."'''
(20:00)
* Chris angrily yells that he did not have the money or support to go see Miyamoto.
(20:30)
* Chris says he went out with Bob to get [[McDonald's|breakfast]], since Bob likes the company.
* Chris reads comic strips in newspapers.
(21:00)
* Clyde says Bob wants someone intelligent to talk to, but all he has is Chris.
* The trolls say Chris is a bad son, and his parents have spent a lot of money on him.
(21:30)
* The trolls say Chris should make his own decisions and not just do everything Bob and Barb want.
(22:00)
* Chris says he is "more likely to stick to a routine."
* Clyde says Chris will just keep going downhill.
* Chris's only response is to tell the trolls to "shut up," and he leaves the chat.
* The trolls discuss the next chance to troll Chris and what BlueSpike should do next.

==Transcript==
[''between 0 and 13 minutes'']

{{quote|Ahhh Jesus Christ|Chris, Once again showing us his devout Christian ways}}

'''Clyde''': We've given you so many chances to improve yourself, I've tried to help you 
'''Chris''': Clyde to your big question I didn't have my (something) on 
'''Clyde''': I've been trying to help you this entire time, but I've grown tired of you doing nothing 
'''Chris''': I have been doing something 
'''Clyde''': What have you done? 
'''Chris''': I have been making plans, I have been thinking very hard about getting a job and about going to Julie and convincing my family that she is, that she is a real woman. [''sigh'']I'm probably, I'm not lying, spending about 50 to 100 dollars of my own money just to try, just to try go up and visit her 
'''Clyde''': How much money? 
'''Chris''': 50 to 100 
'''Clyde''': That's not a lot. (Something). That's chump change in today's society. A long time ago one of our former former (something) Vivian (something) but anywayed to help you but you didn't listen 
'''Chris''': Well look I'm sorry. look I'm sorry about look I'm sorry about a lot of my past mistakes about not listening to everyone ok, but I've been under a lot of stress 
'''Clyde''': What is this stress? You always cite stress 
'''Chris''': Stress STRESS, Stress of the mean people that ha has give me such bad mark uh that have made a bad name and such 
'''Troll 1''': Chris you don't know what stress is, you don't have a job you don't go 
'''Chris''': [''interrupting''] I have a lot of stress in my life, my Aunt Corina and I have to go to her funeral and I'm going to be very sad that day and the funeral is happening on my birthday of all days 
'''Clyde''': Shouldn't you be more sad about her than your birthday? 
'''Chris''': I am very upset about my Aunt Corina, she was a very sweet woman 
'''Clyde''': But you seem to be complain about it being on your birthday 
'''Chris''': Look, stop talking about that ok. I love my [''Clyde butts in with a half formed sentence''] I feel sympathy for my Aunt Corina. She smoked and when she went to the hospital she died at age 75 her her her (something) deteriorated her left lung and her liver and her brain 
[''both Clyde and Chris go to speak''] 
'''Clyde''': Go ahead, sure, why not 
'''Chris''': and they kept her alive as long as they could, they could, till she breathed... her last breath 
[''chris pulls out an academy award wining performance of tears''] 
'''Chris''': [''between sobs and with a heavy heart''] We knew that she was dying (chris is too emotional here to make out what he is saying) and that we were able to say we loved her one last time, over the phone. [''sob''] 
'''Clyde''': well they did their best 
[''Trolls mock and imitate chris''] 
'''Clyde''': Silence, let him cry, let him cry. (something) but this does not excuse for all your other past actions. 
[''Chris has made a miraculous mental recovery from his emotional state''] 
'''Chris''': [''loud sigh''] look I'm unfit, I'm possibly retarded ok my mind doesn't think so swift. I I uh I'm likely even to make mistakes on the fly without realizing it. Sometimes I don't even give thought to something I've said (something) but I can give a lot of before when I move from, pe uh, move from, uh, move from Panda to Julie, because I though, I thought she had died in that fire. I was I uh my heart was petra uh about that possibility after I about that fire in Austra- uh post, It made me so sad [''sobs creep back into Chris's voice''] 
'''Clyde''': Now this I can't believe. I believe your Aunt Corina and I'm sorry for your loss but about Panda, NO 
'''Chris''': I cried my heart out 
'''Clyde''': and then you just moved on, just like that 
'''Chris''': NO, I uh, no I did not move on just like that 
'''Clyde''': But you claimed she was your love your love. You don't know what love feels like chris 
'''Chris''': I do know what love feels like 
'''Clyde''': What does it feel like then chris? Can you describe it? 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] it's... uh [''sigh''] it's indescribable, it's a priceless feeling, it's like you know you feel most elated, it's like your standing on top of a mountain with the wind blowing through your hair and it's a good wind. It's just uh love feels so good. True love feels so good especially when it uh comes between two people who have known each other for a long while and have got to know each other through pleasant conversation. And uh you know the bonus rounds are there too I mean I'll admit that but what I enjoy most are the pleasant conversations and learning about the kind sweet uh kind sweet women that they are [''sigh''] and that they care me and respect me very much and it just makes me feel so much better to know that I'm respected by the women. Because I felt, because it's like I don't get a lot of respect from people, from bad people like y'all being mean like right now. And this is just [''tears welling and emotion rising''] is making me want to cry. 
'''Clyde''': You said the women. are you talking about a singular person or all women? 
[''once again chris has composed himself amazingly well''] 
'''Chris''': No, no I said women, women 
'''Clyde''': You mean you want to be respected by everyone? All the women. You want to love them all? 
'''Chris''': No 
'''Clyde''': or is it down to one person? 
'''Chris''': No uh wait. Now your twisting my words around 
'''Clyde''': I'm just saying whatever you say 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] Look I could uh, its a, look when I talk about the respect from a woman I'm talking about honest respect like after she's got to know me from the inside like uh most women should get to know their man, before they go have a relationship with them or or whatever. And if Julie just, you know between Blanca and Sarah Jackson and Panda, Sarah May and Julie. I was very happy that day when I felt such respect when I felt the true honest respect of them. And there's noth- you know uh you know I'm sorry to have forgot to have mentioned Sarah May when I mentioned Julie (something) when I was asked a question about naming friends. I'll admit I'll admit I was wrong. I was wrong I was wrong and I thank Julie very I mean Sarah Mayver, damn it, I did it again. I got mixed up. You, Y'all mixed it up when you mixed up my emotions because I'm upset all this. Anyways anyways Aunt then got to the hospital and I felt so sorry for 
'''Clyde''': No need, no need for lies to keep up the false stories. They are all trolls. They are all trolls. Chris have I not got this through your head. Panda is sleeping right now if you could be more quiet. Sarah May is perfectly fine. Blanca, Blanca well I don't know where she's off to, the other two people behind Blanca I don't know and Sarah Jackson is still alive. They are all trolls chris. It's because you don't know what true love is 
'''Chris''': I know what true love is 
'''Clyde''': If you knew what true love was then you would realize that they were trolls 
'''Troll 7''': Yep 
'''Chris''': Look, trolls, look, trollers or not I still cared about them very much 
'''Clyde''': What? 
'''Chris''': Trollers or not I still cared about them very much 
'''Troll 3''': you're just bullshitting 
'''Chris''': And I and I I got so, I got so many good memories of them. Some bad sure and some even bad but good 
'''Female troll''': Chris all those memories are false 
'''Troll 2''': You deluded pig 
[''two people speak at once''] 
'''Troll 1''': every scenario, all us 
'''Clyde''': We were behind it all 
'''Chris''': look I know y'all, I know y'all are feeding me lies right now 
[''huge reaction to this, everyone talks over each other''] 
'''Clyde''': You still believe that they were not trolling, this is the thing. Really? Even after Blanca destroyed your medallion, after Panda sudden mysteriously disappeared when she doesn't even live in that part of Australia, well not any more she doesn't, but anyway. You still believe it 
'''Troll 4''': You are stupid chris. You do not learn from your mistakes 
'''Chris''': Look [''sigh''] I do learn from my, I have learnt from my mistakes 
[''several people speak''] 
'''Chris''': I have learnt to take so many bullets and lies that were aimed directly at me, I learnt to take them like uh, like (something) in the wind. Just let them fly by. let them fly by. I have learnt to sort the truth from the false. Panada true, definite true, definitely comes from the woman, from the people themselves 
'''Clyde''': Why would you see through that one (something) Julie after Sarah May and Panda. Urgh, I'm disgusted by that. But we'll make sure she never meets you 
'''Troll 5''': Anyway 
'''Chris''': Look y'all are just, look y'all are just trying to make me feel bad because I have, because I have been delayed, because I was delayed in drawing comics as often as I should be 
[''eruption of sarcastic "oh yeah"s''] 
'''Troll 2''': You idiot, this isn't about the comics 
'''Troll 6''': How's Megan by the way? 
'''Chris''': I DON'T KNOW I haven't seen her in a long time. 
'''Troll 6''': I wonder why 
'''Clyde''': Silence Silence, Ok, I want to ask you one last thing, well not one last thing but a useful thing. Why do you think Megan left you? Can you think why now? I think I've asked you this before 
'''Chris''': I can only think because I got too much in her personal space and I violate her with the drawing 
'''Clyde''': That was probably your only chance for true happiness and you screwed that up, and you're still doing it time and time again 
'''Troll 7''': Yo that drawing's fucked up yo 
'''Clyde''': And you still manage to post it up on your website. Why? 
'''Chris''': I don't... [''sigh''] 
'''Troll 6''': Clyde's correct Chris 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] It's a sexy drawing and it's a sexy website and I thought it was appropriate. 
[''several people respond''] 
'''Chris''': Besides in the drawing the eyes are censored out, it's not like you can recognize the woman 
'''Clyde''': Censorship does nothing once you've admitted it Chris. 
[''trolls agree with Clyde's sentiment''] 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] 
'''Troll 6''': And besides we thought that was your sister for the longest time 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] [''whispering''] Jesus, Jesus 
'''Troll 8''': I thought that was a better theory actually 
'''Chris''': Ahhh Jesus Christ 
'''Troll 6''': Maybe you shouldn't have said anything Chris? 
'''Chris''': Maybe not but y'all didn't have to twist my words round on everything make up all these dang stupid false slanderous theories and what not 
'''Troll 7''': Dude yo that's bullshit 
[''trolls disagree with Chris's sentiment''] 
'''Troll 1''': We're just going off what you've told us 
'''Troll 8''': Exactly 
'''Clyde''': [Unclear] What did you expect would happen? 
'''Troll 2''': You lowlife. I hope you bleed in slanderous hell 
'''Troll 1''': We've never slandered anyone. We just take what you've said and post it for people's interpretations 
'''Chris''': That's my point, you've misinterpret me 
'''Clyde''': Well you're going to have to correct yourself one day, you have to (unclear) 
'''Chris''': I have been correcting myself, every day from the lessons I've learned and the mistakes I've realised I've made 
'''Troll 8''': really? 
'''Chris''': I've gone through so many self revalations and uh,and uh,and personal upgrades for the better 
'''Troll 7''': Like yo PSP 
[''trolls laugh''] 
'''Chris''': Forget about the friggin games systems 
'''Clyde''': Surprising from a man who spends over a thousand dollars on it. You see chris you have a problem. You need to stop buying video games, you need to sell them all. They're no good, they're not helping you 
'''Troll 1''': It's only when you lose everything that you're free to do anything 
'''Troll 8''': The man speaks the truth 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] 
'''Clyde''': You have, We have estimated you have over twenty thousand US dollars worth of video games, all at some points of your life. Why would you spend so much 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] Well I started from childhood, I was brought up, I was brought up with video games. I started with a commodore 64, when it was brand new. Just saying. 
'''Troll''': Chris that is not a valid excuse 
'''Chris''': It's the truth 
'''Troll''': That doesn't make it valid 
'''Clyde''': Chris let me ask you this. How many of the games that you've owned in your lifetime have you actually completed? 
'''Chris''': I have beaten the vast majority of them. I have beat most every sonic the hedgehog game I own. 
'''Clyde''': If you have that much free time on your hands maybe you should get a job 
'''Chris''': Hey you know what, for one thing I would get a job, but you know they would punch my name on the internet, they would find that damn ED page and then 
[''trolls all speak''] 
'''Clyde''': Ok ok, yes you're right, you're right. We have slandered you, well we haven't slandered you. It's only the truth, the truth. I had to say slandered because you say that so much, but anyay. Ok lets say you just did have your own eight hundred dollar uhh, whatever you call it, tugboat, which is a stupid name. It's a government check. You have your eight hundred dollars to spend and how do you spend that? 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] I got uh, I pay my, I pay my, I pay my family's bills, I give them a monthly rent, I pay my credit card bills 
'''Clyde''': But then you still (unclear). 
'''Troll 1''': You're right, chris probably could not get a job but he can not also support himself on his tugboat. So [''loud typing noise''] he can't support his family anyway. too bad 
'''Troll 7''': Yo I can hear that typing, What's with that? 
'''Clyde''': I know that you've revealed that to date you have credit card debts, you're already two thousand dollars behind. How do you expect to raise a family? How do you expect to help Julie? 
'''Chris''': uhh [''more loud typing''] 
'''Troll 5''': Ignoring the question I see 
'''Chris''': No 
'''Clyde''': Look, if you go onto your youtube, beg your fans to bring down us the Miscreants, but you know, your combined powers can not stop us. Nothing can stop us 
'''Troll 8''': Every time we get knocked down we'll get right back up again 
'''Troll 10''': and you'll never keep us down 
'''Troll 11''': and everything that you have typed is through no one's fault but your own. You have, Youhave to reap what you have sown chris 
'''Troll 1''': the best thing you can do is you know, go back out into the real world with your sign, you know. Wouldn't that be, just like old days? You wouldn't have the internet trolls all over you. You just go outside 
'''Chris''': [sigh] 
[''rapid fire error noise''] 
[''more loud typing''] 
'''Troll 1''': What are you afraid on the sun? 
[''trolls all talk at once''] 
'''Chris''': I am not, I am not afraid 
'''Clyde''': (unclear) then why have you not, you know, uhhh I don't know. When's the last time you've been outside chris? 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] I've been outside, I go outside every day 
[Clyde says something, phone ringing] 
'''Chris''': I enjoy the air, anyway look, max wants me to tell you that uhh, Julie will be at HQ in ten minutes 
''Troll'': (unclear) 
'''Clyde''': (unclear)I meanenjpy the air? I doubt it. I honestly think you're lying chris again? 
[''more load typing''] 
'''Chris''': I am not lying to you! Ev- most everything I tell you is the truth and if I make uh I if I make a certain, if I say the wrong things its because I didn't know better at the time 
'''Clyde''': What do you mean you don't know better? You don't know what the truth and what the uh, flase is? 
'''Troll 5''': You can't tell right from wrong? 
'''Troll 8''': You lied to everyone when you said you were going to (unclear) 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] Because they, because, because they were, because they were big time theories and my families wouldn't support me, I DID NOT HAVE THE MONEY TO MAKE A TRIP 
'''Troll 8''': So why lie to us 
'''Troll 12''': My my aren't we a suffering joe 
'''Troll 8''': stuttering stanley, stuttering stanley 
'''Clyde''': Ok we don't need stupid insults, we need real insults, you know. I mean chris, again, last time you've been outside. Detail it for us. Don't just say you just went out for air, that's a lie 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] I went out with my father this morning for one thing, to go get, to go get breakfast. 
'''Clyde''': Where? I'd like to know 
'''Chris''': And plus, and plus, plus he likes the comapny he takes the newspaer with him. I read the comics and he reads evry- uh he reads the rest 
'''Troll 7''': [''laughs''] comics 
'''Clyde''': You know I feel kind of bad for your father. All he wants is someone you know, intellignet to talk with but all he has is you 
'''Chris''': He has my mother to 
'''Clyde''': Well that to but someone of a male comradery, someone who can (unclear). You're not a very good son I take it 
'''Chris''': I AM A GOOD SON and they have raised me very hard and they have spent a lot of moeny on me and I love them very much and appreciate them very much for that 
'''Troll 13''': Almost too much. You seem to value their input more than you actually should. You are 26 years old, you are technically an adult but uhh- 
'''Chris''': Yeah but, it's not like, it's not like uhh. Look I have emotions and feelings and I uh I'm I'm more likely to stick to a routine and in order for me to make a big change I had to end upgiving it a lot of thought first 
'''Clyde''': Look Chris, this is the sad sad truth. You are going to grow up and die alone. I'm sorry to tell you this. 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] Look leave me, just just shut up and leave me alone, leave me alone 
'''Clyde''': We tried to help y- 
'''Chris''': [''interrupting''] Leave my love life alone 
'''Clyde''': Whatever 
[''Chris seems to be reduced to tears and leaves, trolls all speak''] 

{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 9|Mumble Chat 9]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 10|Mumble Chat 10]]|}}

==Links==
[http://www.mediafire.com/?d1igtymai3y Download]

{{FanChats}}
[[Category:Mumble chats]]

Mumble 9.5

2010-05-15T18:30:42Z

Big Fucking Whoopie: Finished Transcript

'''Mumble 9.5''' is the continuation of the [[Mumble 9|ninth]] of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]].

==Summary==
[[Chris]] rejoins the [[Miscreants]] in chat. [[Clyde]] and the Miscreants again bombard Chris with accusations that he doesn't care about his [[Aunt Corina|Aunt Corina's]] death, and he's more sad that a funeral is ruining his birthday. The trolls again accuse Chris of [[List of Chris's games|wasting money on video games]] (with Clyde leveling the accusation that Chris and his family have spent more than $20,000 on games), and Chris offers little of substance in response.

Chris eventually storms out of the chat after being told he is afraid to go outside, and that leaving his [[14 Branchland Court|house]] for a change is the only way to get the Miscreants to leave him alone.

In one of the more famous Mumble moments, Chris admits that he may be "[[Autism|retarded]]" and that his mind doesn't think so quickly... making it obvious why he goes out of his way to mock "[[A Week With Christian Chandler#Page 6|slow-in-the-minds]]."

(00:00)
* The chat begins in the middle of a conversation between [[Clyde]] and [[Chris]].
* Clyde says Chris has improved nothing in his life.
(00:30)
* Chris says he has been thinking "very hard" about [[Wendy's|getting a job]], going to [[Julie]], and convincing [[Bob]] and [[Barb]] that Julie is real.
(01:00)
* Chris feels it is significant he is ready to spend "fifty to a hundred" dollars to go see Julie.
(02:00)
* Chris says the trolls do not realize how much stress he has because he must go to a funeral for his [[Aunt Corrina]] and that it is "happening on his birthday of all days."
* Clyde says Chris is more sad about his birthday than Aunt Corrina.
(02:30)
* Chris seems that he is crying over Aunt Corrina.
(03:00)
* Chris's blubbering suddenly improves and stops, indicating that it's likely bogus.
* Clyde tells trolls to let Chris cry.
(03:30)
* Chris says he is "possibly retarded," since his mind doesn't think so swift.
* Chris says he often doesn't even give thought to the actions he does.
(04:00)
* Hearing about the fire "made Chris so sad" and he "cried his heart out."
(05:00)
* Chris says love is like "standing on top of a mountain" and having "good wind" blow through your hair.
* People are to get to know each other through "pleasant conversation" and it is not all about the "bonus round."
(06:30)
* Chris says women should get to know men "[[gay|from the inside]]."
* Chris felt "true honest respect" from Julie, [[Blanca]], [[Sarah May]], [[Sarah Jackson]] and [[Panda]].
(08:00)
* Clyde says if he knew what true love was, Chris would know they were trolls. Chris says "trolls or not, I still care about them very much."
(08:30)
* Chris has got "some good memories" of those women.
(09:30)
* Chris claims he has learned from his mistakes and learned how to sort the "true from the false."
(10:30)
*Chris angrily responds to a question about Megan.
(11:00)
*Clyde asks whether Chris realizes why Megan left. After a pause, Chris says it is because he "got into her personal space" and "violated her drawing."
(12:00)
* Chris says he feels the [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|sexy drawing]] and sexy websites are "appropriate" and says "the eyes are censored and you can't recognize Megan."
(13:30)
* The trolls insult Chris and tell him they haven't slandered him- they've only posted his words.
* Chris claims he has been misinterpreted and has gone through "so many revolutions and personal upgrades for the better."
(14:30)
* Clyde says the Miscreants have estimated Chris has spent over [[list of Chris's games|$20,000 on video games in his life]].
(15:30)
* Chris blames the ED page for not getting a job.
(16:00)
* Clyde attacks Chris for misspending his tugboat. Chris says he spends his money by paying the bills, his rent, and credit cards.
(16:30)
* The trolls say there is no way Chris will ever support a family.
* Clyde accuses Chris of being $2000 behind in credit card debt.
(17:30)
* Clyde says the Miscreants can't be stopped, and Chris stops answering.
(19:00)
* Chris says he goes outside every day, but changes the subject.
* Chris says [[Max]] has said to pass on the message that Julie will be at HQ in ten minutes.
(19:30)
* Chris says '''"most everything I tell you is the truth."'''
(20:00)
* Chris angrily yells that he did not have the money or support to go see Miyamoto.
(20:30)
* Chris says he went out with Bob to get [[McDonald's|breakfast]], since Bob likes the company.
* Chris reads comic strips in newspapers.
(21:00)
* Clyde says Bob wants someone intelligent to talk to, but all he has is Chris.
* The trolls say Chris is a bad son, and his parents have spent a lot of money on him.
(21:30)
* The trolls say Chris should make his own decisions and not just do everything Bob and Barb want.
(22:00)
* Chris says he is "more likely to stick to a routine."
* Clyde says Chris will just keep going downhill.
* Chris's only response is to tell the trolls to "shut up," and he leaves the chat.
* The trolls discuss the next chance to troll Chris and what BlueSpike should do next.

==Transcript==
[''between 0 and 13 minutes'']

{{quote|Ahhh Jesus Christ|Chris, Once again showing us his devout Christian ways}}

'''Clyde''': We've given you so many chances to improve yourself, I've tried to help you 
'''Chris''': Clyde to your big question I didn't have my (something) on 
'''Clyde''': I've been trying to help you this entire time, but I've grown tired of you doing nothing 
'''Chris''': I have been doing something 
'''Clyde''': What have you done? 
'''Chris''': I have been making plans, I have been thinking very hard about getting a job and about going to Julie and convincing my family that she is, that she is a real woman. [''sigh'']I'm probably, I'm not lying, spending about 50 to 100 dollars of my own money just to try, just to try go up and visit her 
'''Clyde''': How much money? 
'''Chris''': 50 to 100 
'''Clyde''': That's not a lot. (Something). That's chump change in today's society. A long time ago one of our former former (something) Vivian (something) but anywayed to help you but you didn't listen 
'''Chris''': Well look I'm sorry. look I'm sorry about look I'm sorry about a lot of my past mistakes about not listening to everyone ok, but I've been under a lot of stress 
'''Clyde''': What is this stress? You always cite stress 
'''Chris''': Stress STRESS, Stress of the mean people that ha has give me such bad mark uh that have made a bad name and such 
'''Troll 1''': Chris you don't know what stress is, you don't have a job you don't go 
'''Chris''': [''interrupting''] I have a lot of stress in my life, my Aunt Corina and I have to go to her funeral and I'm going to be very sad that day and the funeral is happening on my birthday of all days 
'''Clyde''': Shouldn't you be more sad about her than your birthday? 
'''Chris''': I am very upset about my Aunt Corina, she was a very sweet woman 
'''Clyde''': But you seem to be complain about it being on your birthday 
'''Chris''': Look, stop talking about that ok. I love my [''Clyde butts in with a half formed sentence''] I feel sympathy for my Aunt Corina. She smoked and when she went to the hospital she died at age 75 her her her (something) deteriorated her left lung and her liver and her brain 
[''both Clyde and Chris go to speak''] 
'''Clyde''': Go ahead, sure, why not 
'''Chris''': and they kept her alive as long as they could, they could, till she breathed... her last breath 
[''chris pulls out an academy award wining performance of tears''] 
'''Chris''': [''between sobs and with a heavy heart''] We knew that she was dying (chris is too emotional here to make out what he is saying) and that we were able to say we loved her one last time, over the phone. [''sob''] 
'''Clyde''': well they did their best 
[''Trolls mock and imitate chris''] 
'''Clyde''': Silence, let him cry, let him cry. (something) but this does not excuse for all your other past actions. 
[''Chris has made a miraculous mental recovery from his emotional state''] 
'''Chris''': [''loud sigh''] look I'm unfit, I'm possibly retarded ok my mind doesn't think so swift. I I uh I'm likely even to make mistakes on the fly without realizing it. Sometimes I don't even give thought to something I've said (something) but I can give a lot of before when I move from, pe uh, move from, uh, move from Panda to Julie, because I though, I thought she had died in that fire. I was I uh my heart was petra uh about that possibility after I about that fire in Austra- uh post, It made me so sad [''sobs creep back into Chris's voice''] 
'''Clyde''': Now this I can't believe. I believe your Aunt Corina and I'm sorry for your loss but about Panda, NO 
'''Chris''': I cried my heart out 
'''Clyde''': and then you just moved on, just like that 
'''Chris''': NO, I uh, no I did not move on just like that 
'''Clyde''': But you claimed she was your love your love. You don't know what love feels like chris 
'''Chris''': I do know what love feels like 
'''Clyde''': What does it feel like then chris? Can you describe it? 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] it's... uh [''sigh''] it's indescribable, it's a priceless feeling, it's like you know you feel most elated, it's like your standing on top of a mountain with the wind blowing through your hair and it's a good wind. It's just uh love feels so good. True love feels so good especially when it uh comes between two people who have known each other for a long while and have got to know each other through pleasant conversation. And uh you know the bonus rounds are there too I mean I'll admit that but what I enjoy most are the pleasant conversations and learning about the kind sweet uh kind sweet women that they are [''sigh''] and that they care me and respect me very much and it just makes me feel so much better to know that I'm respected by the women. Because I felt, because it's like I don't get a lot of respect from people, from bad people like y'all being mean like right now. And this is just [''tears welling and emotion rising''] is making me want to cry. 
'''Clyde''': You said the women. are you talking about a singular person or all women? 
[''once again chris has composed himself amazingly well''] 
'''Chris''': No, no I said women, women 
'''Clyde''': You mean you want to be respected by everyone? All the women. You want to love them all? 
'''Chris''': No 
'''Clyde''': or is it down to one person? 
'''Chris''': No uh wait. Now your twisting my words around 
'''Clyde''': I'm just saying whatever you say 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] Look I could uh, its a, look when I talk about the respect from a woman I'm talking about honest respect like after she's got to know me from the inside like uh most women should get to know their man, before they go have a relationship with them or or whatever. And if Julie just, you know between Blanca and Sarah Jackson and Panda, Sarah May and Julie. I was very happy that day when I felt such respect when I felt the true honest respect of them. And there's noth- you know uh you know I'm sorry to have forgot to have mentioned Sarah May when I mentioned Julie (something) when I was asked a question about naming friends. I'll admit I'll admit I was wrong. I was wrong I was wrong and I thank Julie very I mean Sarah Mayver, damn it, I did it again. I got mixed up. You, Y'all mixed it up when you mixed up my emotions because I'm upset all this. Anyways anyways Aunt then got to the hospital and I felt so sorry for 
'''Clyde''': No need, no need for lies to keep up the false stories. They are all trolls. They are all trolls. Chris have I not got this through your head. Panda is sleeping right now if you could be more quiet. Sarah May is perfectly fine. Blanca, Blanca well I don't know where she's off to, the other two people behind Blanca I don't know and Sarah Jackson is still alive. They are all trolls chris. It's because you don't know what true love is 
'''Chris''': I know what true love is 
'''Clyde''': If you knew what true love was then you would realize that they were trolls 
'''Troll 7''': Yep 
'''Chris''': Look, trolls, look, trollers or not I still cared about them very much 
'''Clyde''': What? 
'''Chris''': Trollers or not I still cared about them very much 
'''Troll 3''': you're just bullshitting 
'''Chris''': And I and I I got so, I got so many good memories of them. Some bad sure and some even bad but good 
'''Female troll''': Chris all those memories are false 
'''Troll 2''': You deluded pig 
[''two people speak at once''] 
'''Troll 1''': every scenario, all us 
'''Clyde''': We were behind it all 
'''Chris''': look I know y'all, I know y'all are feeding me lies right now 
[''huge reaction to this, everyone talks over each other''] 
'''Clyde''': You still believe that they were not trolling, this is the thing. Really? Even after Blanca destroyed your medallion, after Panda sudden mysteriously disappeared when she doesn't even live in that part of Australia, well not any more she doesn't, but anyway. You still believe it 
'''Troll 4''': You are stupid chris. You do not learn from your mistakes 
'''Chris''': Look [''sigh''] I do learn from my, I have learnt from my mistakes 
[''several people speak''] 
'''Chris''': I have learnt to take so many bullets and lies that were aimed directly at me, I learnt to take them like uh, like (something) in the wind. Just let them fly by. let them fly by. I have learnt to sort the truth from the false. Panada true, definite true, definitely comes from the woman, from the people themselves 
'''Clyde''': Why would you see through that one (something) Julie after Sarah May and Panda. Urgh, I'm disgusted by that. But we'll make sure she never meets you 
'''Troll 5''': Anyway 
'''Chris''': Look y'all are just, look y'all are just trying to make me feel bad because I have, because I have been delayed, because I was delayed in drawing comics as often as I should be 
[''eruption of sarcastic "oh yeah"s''] 
'''Troll 2''': You idiot, this isn't about the comics 
'''Troll 6''': How's Megan by the way? 
'''Chris''': I DON'T KNOW I haven't seen her in a long time. 
'''Troll 6''': I wonder why 
'''Clyde''': Silence Silence, Ok, I want to ask you one last thing, well not one last thing but a useful thing. Why do you think Megan left you? Can you think why now? I think I've asked you this before 
'''Chris''': I can only think because I got too much in her personal space and I violate her with the drawing 
'''Clyde''': That was probably your only chance for true happiness and you screwed that up, and you're still doing it time and time again 
'''Troll 7''': Yo that drawing's fucked up yo 
'''Clyde''': And you still manage to post it up on your website. Why? 
'''Chris''': I don't... [''sigh''] 
'''Troll 6''': Clyde's correct Chris 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] It's a sexy drawing and it's a sexy website and I thought it was appropriate. 
[''several people respond''] 
'''Chris''': Besides in the drawing the eyes are censored out, it's not like you can recognize the woman 
'''Clyde''': Censorship does nothing once you've admitted it Chris. 
[''trolls agree with Clyde's sentiment''] 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] 
'''Troll 6''': And besides we thought that was your sister for the longest time 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] [''whispering''] Jesus, Jesus 
'''Troll 8''': I thought that was a better theory actually 
'''Chris''': Ahhh Jesus Christ 
'''Troll 6''': Maybe you shouldn't have said anything Chris? 
'''Chris''': Maybe not but y'all didn't have to twist my words round on everything make up all these dang stupid false slanderous theories and what not 
'''Troll 7''': Dude yo that's bullshit 
[''trolls disagree with Chris's sentiment''] 
'''Troll 1''': We're just going off what you've told us 
'''Troll 8''': Exactly 
'''Clyde''': [Unclear] What did you expect would happen? 
'''Troll 2''': You lowlife. I hope you bleed in slanderous hell 
'''Troll 1''': We've never slandered anyone. We just take what you've said and post it for people's interpretations 
'''Chris''': That's my point, you've misinterpret me 
'''Clyde''': Well you're going to have to correct yourself one day, you have to (unclear) 
'''Chris''': I have been correcting myself, every day from the lessons I've learned and the mistakes I've realised I've made 
'''Troll 8''': really? 
'''Chris''': I've gone through so many self revalations and uh,and uh,and personal upgrades for the better 
'''Troll 7''': Like yo PSP 
[''trolls laugh''] 
'''Chris''': Forget about the friggin games systems 
'''Clyde''': Surprising from a man who spends over a thousand dollars on it. You see chris you have a problem. You need to stop buying video games, you need to sell them all. They're no good, they're not helping you 
'''Troll 1''': It's only when you lose everything that you're free to do anything 
'''Troll 8''': The man speaks the truth 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] 
'''Clyde''': You have, We have estimated you have over twenty thousand US dollars worth of video games, all at some points of your life. Why would you spend so much 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] Well I started from childhood, I was brought up, I was brought up with video games. I started with a commodore 64, when it was brand new. Just saying. 
'''Troll''': Chris that is not a valid excuse 
'''Chris''': It's the truth 
'''Troll''': That doesn't make it valid 
'''Clyde''': Chris let me ask you this. How many of the games that you've owned in your lifetime have you actually completed? 
'''Chris''': I have beaten the vast majority of them. I have beat most every sonic the hedgehog game I own. 
'''Clyde''': If you have that much free time on your hands maybe you should get a job 
'''Chris''': Hey you know what, for one thing I would get a job, but you know they would punch my name on the internet, they would find that damn ED page and then 
[''trolls all speak''] 
'''Clyde''': Ok ok, yes you're right, you're right. We have slandered you, well we haven't slandered you. It's only the truth, the truth. I had to say slandered because you say that so much, but anyay. Ok lets say you just did have your own eight hundred dollar uhh, whatever you call it, tugboat, which is a stupid name. It's a government check. You have your eight hundred dollars to spend and how do you spend that? 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] I got uh, I pay my, I pay my, I pay my family's bills, I give them a monthly rent, I pay my credit card bills 
'''Clyde''': But then you still (unclear). 
'''Troll 1''': You're right, chris probably could not get a job but he can not also support himself on his tugboat. So [''loud typing noise''] he can't support his family anyway. too bad 
'''Troll 7''': Yo I can hear that typing, What's with that? 
'''Clyde''': I know that you've revealed that to date you have credit card debts, you're already two thousand dollars behind. How do you expect to raise a family? How do you expect to help Julie? 
'''Chris''': uhh [''more loud typing''] 
'''Troll 5''': Ignoring the question I see 
'''Chris''': No 
'''Clyde''': Look, if you go onto your youtube, beg your fans to bring down us the Miscreants, but you know, your combined powers can not stop us. Nothing can stop us 
'''Troll 8''': Every time we get knocked down we'll get right back up again 
'''Troll 10''': and you'll never keep us down 
'''Troll 11''': and everything that you have typed is through no one's fault but your own. You have, Youhave to reap what you have sown chris 
'''Troll 1''': the best thing you can do is you know, go back out into the real world with your sign, you know. Wouldn't that be, just like old days? You wouldn't have the internet trolls all over you. You just go outside 
'''Chris''': [sigh] 
[''rapid fire error noise''] 
[''more loud typing''] 
'''Troll 1''': What are you afraid on the sun? 
[''trolls all talk at once''] 
'''Chris''': I am not, I am not afraid 
'''Clyde''': (unclear) then why have you not, you know, uhhh I don't know. When's the last time you've been outside chris? 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] I've been outside, I go outside every day 
[Clyde says something, phone ringing] 
'''Chris''': I enjoy the air, anyway look, max wants me to tell you that uhh, Julie will be at HQ in ten minutes 
Troll: (unclear) 
'''Clyde''': (unclear)I meanenjpy the air? I doubt it. I honestly think you're lying chris again? 
[''more load typing''] 
'''Chris''': I am not lying to you! Ev- most everything I tell you is the truth and if I make uh I if I make a certain, if I say the wrong things its because I didn't know better at the time 
'''Clyde''': What do you mean you don't know better? You don't know what the truth and what the uh, flase is? 
'''Troll 5''': You can't tell right from wrong? 
'''Troll 8''': You lied to everyone when you said you were going to (unclear) 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] Because they, because, because they were, because they were big time theories and my families wouldn't support me, I DID NOT HAVE THE MONEY TO MAKE A TRIP
'''Troll 8''': So why lie to us 
'''Troll 12''': My my aren't we a suffering joe 
'''Troll 8''': stuttering stanley, stuttering stanley 
'''Clyde''': Ok we don't need stupid insults, we need real insults, you know. I mean chris, again, last time you've been outside. Detail it for us. Don't just say you just went out for air, that's a lie 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] I went out with my father this morning for one thing, to go get, to go get breakfast. 
'''Clyde''': Where? I'd like to know 
'''Chris''': And plus, and plus, plus he likes the comapny he takes the newspaer with him. I read the comics and he reads evry- uh he reads the rest 
'''Troll 7''': [''laughs''] comics 
'''Clyde''': You know I feel kind of bad for your father. All he wants is someone you know, intellignet to talk with but all he has is you 
'''Chris''': He has my mother to 
'''Clyde''': Well that to but someone of a male comradery, someone who can (unclear). You're not a very good son I take it 
'''Chris''': I AM A GOOD SON and they have raised me very hard and they have spent a lot of moeny on me and I love them very much and appreciate them very much for that 
'''Troll 13''': Almost too much. You seem to value their input more than you actually should. You are 26 years old, you are technically an adult but uhh- 
'''Chris''': Yeah but, it's not like, it's not like uhh. Look I have emotions and feelings and I uh I'm I'm more likely to stick to a routine and in order for me to make a big change I had to end upgiving it a lot of thought first 
'''Clyde''': Look Chris, this is the sad sad truth. You are going to grow up and die alone. I'm sorry to tell you this. 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] Look leave me, just just shut up and leave me alone, leave me alone 
'''Clyde''': We tried to help y- 
'''Chris''': [''interrupting''] Leave my love life alone 
'''Clyde''': Whatever 
[''Chris seems to be reduced to tears and leaves, trolls all speak''] 

{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 9|Mumble Chat 9]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 10|Mumble Chat 10]]|}}

==Links==
[http://www.mediafire.com/?d1igtymai3y Download]

{{FanChats}}
[[Category:Mumble chats]]

User talk:Ronichu

2010-04-26T16:35:47Z

Big Fucking Whoopie: /* Cheers cunt */

{{welcome|Pfargtl9000}}
[[User:Pfargtl9000|Pfargtl9000]] 00:46, 10 April 2010 (UTC)
*Hi! I suggest that we move that list about Chris's "Chris_chan" page from the [[ED]] page to the [[Chris-Chan (CWCipedia)]] page, where it would be of more help. What do you think? --[[User:GokuGetEm|GokuGetEm]] 10:04, 18 December 2009 (CET)

Eh I thought I was cool but I guess I'm not, I'll just go back to lurking and transcribing. [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 08:35, 15 April 2010 (UTC)

No problem. I don't have anything else to do at the moment. [[User:Thelieisacake|Thelieisacake]] 13:16, 15 April 2010 (UTC)

Don't get yourself down man, at least you tried. More than that, you confirmed to everyone that Bob was alive and back home. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 15:34, 15 April 2010 (UTC)

Notes to self:

Write about:

Chris and mindless devotion.
Chris and failing despite many opportunities.

== Re: Typos ==

I ain't surprised given how much transcribing you do - nut job :P --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 15:19, 17 April 2010 (UTC)

== You are a hero ==

Srs. Good job on the Mumble chats. I take my hat off to you. If he tries any more spanish shit, drop me a line and I'll get it sorted. --[[User:YawningSquirtleRedux|YawningSquirtleRedux]] 16:05, 17 April 2010 (UTC)
:* Thanks man, I really appreciate that. Still got more to go tho'. :) [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 16:29, 17 April 2010 (UTC)
::*Ronichu is clearly some sort of god, trapped in mortal flesh.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 18:23, 17 April 2010 (UTC)

===Medal of Merit===
For your work on Mumble Chat 3, you have been awarded the Medal of Merit. Congratulations and keep up the good work.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 20:36, 17 April 2010 (UTC)
:* Thank you man. I'm tearing up over here. :') -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 10:20, 18 April 2010 (UTC)
==Note to Self==
Based on the info in the leaked emails, I believe I am close to identifying the YASG. -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 06:16, 22 April 2010 (UTC)

==Miggastolemyfamicon==

What's all this about niggastolemyfamicom needing to be shot to the moon? Explaination plox. --[[User:YawningSquirtleRedux|YawningSquirtleRedux]] 06:52, 24 April 2010 (UTC)

'S all cool, no sweat. I just wanted to know if banhammering was the way forward. Thanks for pointing it out to me though. Good job, as always. --[[User:YawningSquirtleRedux|YawningSquirtleRedux]] 07:31, 24 April 2010 (UTC)

Just to follow up, he got a banhammer to the head from me. Thanks. --[[User:YawningSquirtleRedux|YawningSquirtleRedux]] 12:37, 24 April 2010 (UTC)

Nice call, chief Squirtle Who Yawns. :D -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 13:09, 24 April 2010 (UTC)

Hey, no sweat. Thanks for bring it to my attention. Keep up the good work, you legend. --[[User:YawningSquirtleRedux|YawningSquirtleRedux]] 13:16, 24 April 2010 (UTC)

==Halp?==
i was told that you were trans mumble 6, and i wanted to see if you needed a hand as I am completely free for the weekend. I just dont want to get in your way, so i am going to start around 1:20:00 or 1:10:00. if you want me to do somethig else or or you want me to GTFO, tell me kthxbai.--[[User:Rosechupenis|Rosechupenis]] 20:46, 24 April 2010 (UTC)

== Cheers cunt ==
I'll help you out on the mumble chats in general. There's a shit ton to be done in there and it'll be easier to tackle it with more than one person. I can 9.5 done in one more sitting then can move on to others. Any ones of high priority? Edit: jesus christ I've just been looking at what you've been doing. Don't know if I'll put up that much effort but my metaphorical hat goes off to you sir. [[User:Big Fucking Whoopie|Big Fucking Whoopie]] 15:02, 26 April 2010 (UTC)

User:Big Fucking Whoopie

2010-04-26T15:16:08Z

Big Fucking Whoopie:

<div style="clear:right; float:right; width:358x;">
{{Australian}}</div>

=immediate to do list=
*Finish Mumble 9.5 transcript
*Finish Mumble 9 transcript

=done=
*Second half of mumble 10 transcript

User:Big Fucking Whoopie

2010-04-26T15:15:12Z

Big Fucking Whoopie:

<div style="clear:right; float:right; width:358x;">
{{Australian}}</div>

=immediate to do list=
*Finish Mumble 9.5 transcript
*Finish Mumble 9

User:Big Fucking Whoopie

2010-04-26T15:14:23Z

Big Fucking Whoopie: Created page with '<div style="clear:right; float:right; width:358x;"> {{Australian}} =immediate to do list= *Finish Mumble 9.5 transcript *Finish Mumble 9'

<div style="clear:right; float:right; width:358x;">
{{Australian}}

=immediate to do list=
*Finish Mumble 9.5 transcript
*Finish Mumble 9

User talk:Ronichu

2010-04-26T15:02:31Z

Big Fucking Whoopie:

{{welcome|Pfargtl9000}}
[[User:Pfargtl9000|Pfargtl9000]] 00:46, 10 April 2010 (UTC)
*Hi! I suggest that we move that list about Chris's "Chris_chan" page from the [[ED]] page to the [[Chris-Chan (CWCipedia)]] page, where it would be of more help. What do you think? --[[User:GokuGetEm|GokuGetEm]] 10:04, 18 December 2009 (CET)

Eh I thought I was cool but I guess I'm not, I'll just go back to lurking and transcribing. [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 08:35, 15 April 2010 (UTC)

No problem. I don't have anything else to do at the moment. [[User:Thelieisacake|Thelieisacake]] 13:16, 15 April 2010 (UTC)

Don't get yourself down man, at least you tried. More than that, you confirmed to everyone that Bob was alive and back home. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 15:34, 15 April 2010 (UTC)

Notes to self:

Write about:

Chris and mindless devotion.
Chris and failing despite many opportunities.

== Re: Typos ==

I ain't surprised given how much transcribing you do - nut job :P --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 15:19, 17 April 2010 (UTC)

== You are a hero ==

Srs. Good job on the Mumble chats. I take my hat off to you. If he tries any more spanish shit, drop me a line and I'll get it sorted. --[[User:YawningSquirtleRedux|YawningSquirtleRedux]] 16:05, 17 April 2010 (UTC)
:* Thanks man, I really appreciate that. Still got more to go tho'. :) [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 16:29, 17 April 2010 (UTC)
::*Ronichu is clearly some sort of god, trapped in mortal flesh.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 18:23, 17 April 2010 (UTC)

===Medal of Merit===
For your work on Mumble Chat 3, you have been awarded the Medal of Merit. Congratulations and keep up the good work.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 20:36, 17 April 2010 (UTC)
:* Thank you man. I'm tearing up over here. :') -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 10:20, 18 April 2010 (UTC)
==Note to Self==
Based on the info in the leaked emails, I believe I am close to identifying the YASG. -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 06:16, 22 April 2010 (UTC)

==Miggastolemyfamicon==

What's all this about niggastolemyfamicom needing to be shot to the moon? Explaination plox. --[[User:YawningSquirtleRedux|YawningSquirtleRedux]] 06:52, 24 April 2010 (UTC)

'S all cool, no sweat. I just wanted to know if banhammering was the way forward. Thanks for pointing it out to me though. Good job, as always. --[[User:YawningSquirtleRedux|YawningSquirtleRedux]] 07:31, 24 April 2010 (UTC)

Just to follow up, he got a banhammer to the head from me. Thanks. --[[User:YawningSquirtleRedux|YawningSquirtleRedux]] 12:37, 24 April 2010 (UTC)

Nice call, chief Squirtle Who Yawns. :D -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 13:09, 24 April 2010 (UTC)

Hey, no sweat. Thanks for bring it to my attention. Keep up the good work, you legend. --[[User:YawningSquirtleRedux|YawningSquirtleRedux]] 13:16, 24 April 2010 (UTC)

==Halp?==
i was told that you were trans mumble 6, and i wanted to see if you needed a hand as I am completely free for the weekend. I just dont want to get in your way, so i am going to start around 1:20:00 or 1:10:00. if you want me to do somethig else or or you want me to GTFO, tell me kthxbai.--[[User:Rosechupenis|Rosechupenis]] 20:46, 24 April 2010 (UTC)

== Cheers cunt ==
I'll help you out on the mumble chats in general. There's a shit ton to be done in there and it'll be easier to tackle it with more than one person. I can 9.5 done in one more sitting then can move on to others. Any ones of high priority? [[User:Big Fucking Whoopie|Big Fucking Whoopie]] 15:02, 26 April 2010 (UTC)

Talk:Mumble 9.5

2010-04-26T14:40:37Z

Big Fucking Whoopie:

Mumble 9.5

2010-04-26T14:35:14Z

Big Fucking Whoopie: Transcript form 0 to 13 minutes posted

Mumble 10

2010-04-26T12:18:08Z

Big Fucking Whoopie:

{{quote|I can tell in my heart that Julie is 19. I'm sure that Max can vouch for her age.|Chris}}

The tenth of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]]. The [[Trolls|loyal fanbase]] try to persuade Chris to travel to Cleveland to rescue Julie from the clutches of her evil brother, Max. Chris (and his mother) have some doubts, mostly that it is a sting operation in the manner of ''To Catch a Predator'' (which had stopped filming by 2009). One of the trolls tries to tell Chris an anecdote about independence and asserting yourself to gain the respect of your parents as you grow up, but Chris interrupts him and talks over his story.

==Summary==
* Trolls talk on an unrelated subject before [[Chris]] arrives.
* Chris says that [[Max]] took Julie to HQ, and asks if he could be hurt or jailed for going to pick her up. Trolls aren't sure.
* None of them have heard of HQ.
* Chris has 5 days to pick Julie up from [[The Miscreants|Miscreant]] HQ in Cleveland, Ohio.
* A troll says that [[Clyde]] is testing Chris's love for [[Julie]], and he should go.
* Chris whines about the 400 mile, seven-hour drive.
* He's 'feeling insecure' about the trip. Even though he's an adult, he should respect his parents' wishes.
* A troll says that no force can keep true love apart.
* It's [[Christian Love Day|Chris's birthday]] tomorrow, he was born at 5:30 in the morning.
* '''Chris says that love is priceless, but he has to do all the work to get to Cleveland.'''
* His [[Barb|mum]] will say not to go, and is worried. He can't convince her to let him go.
* '''Barb is jealous of Chris loving another woman more than her. He has to respect her wishes.'''
* '''His parents pay for his gas. [[Son-Chu]] is Barb's car.'''
* Chris was born at 5:30 EST at Martha Jefferson Hospital, Charlottesville.
* Barb is worried about Chris being set up to be hurt or turned into the police.
* She said the same thing when he was going to visit Blanca - She could be [[pedofork|underaged]] and Chris could be arrested.
* '''Chris can tell in his heart that Julie is 19. Max can vouch for her age. In her scanned ID picture, the year was blurred out.'''
* Trolls compare 'To Catch a Predator' - The person always tells the suspect that they are underage. Chris wouldn't be charged, as they all know Julie is 19.
* Chris leaves.
* Chris returns. Max cackles evilly. Sounds like canned laughter. This makes Chris suspicious about the trip.
* Max is watching [[Family Guy]] Chris gets distracted and starts talking about the episode, saying he loves it.
* [[Aunt Corina]]'s funeral is later; he can't go now.
* Trolls say that this is a birthday test from God and he should go. Chris insists on talking to his mom first.
* Max has intercepted the [[sex tape|video]] that Chris made for Julie. '''The girl who told him this says that Julie is also a troll.'''
* The trolls say that this can't be true. Chris agrees.
* '''He believes in her, Julie is a wonderful sweet 19 year old who wrote him a very nice letter and sent it in the mail with pictures that her friend took.'''
* A troll says that Julie wouldn't be a troll, she's been trolled her whole life by the Georgian government.
* Chris researched Georgia when looking for [[Molvania]]. A troll says that his schoolbooks had a map of [[Molvania]].
* The troll no longer has a map, he had to burn his schoolbooks to heat his house.
* Chris has seen a map of Molvania, but not its surrounding countries.
* Max says he isn't a troll.
* Wait, Chris misread. He is a troll.
* A troll references [[Mumble 9.5]]. Chris says that they got to him emotionally so he can't remember the details.
* The trolls can't do anything about Max. He is a bad boy. One suggests googling [[The Miscreants]].
* A troll makes a joke. Chris laughs, says that it's funny, but says he isn't in the mood to laugh.
* A troll asks Chris if he can tell a story. Chris interrupts: "Sure. Once upon a time..."
* Chris is looking at [[The Miscreants]]' website.
* Chris looks over Miscreant operatives and operations, detailing various acts of trolling against him. He seems to have minimal reaction to this list of various 'friends' and what they were assigned to get from him.
* [[PandaHalo]] being alive yields no response.
* The trolls says that nothing on the site is too bad. The Miscreants are either afraid of or testing Chris.
* Chris says that the [[ED]] page stops him from getting a job.
* Chris thanks the trolls for their input. He'll update his mom and ask for gas money.
* The trolls says that he needs to assert himself against his mother; she should respect him on his birthday.
* Chris says today is [[Aunt Corina]]'s funeral, so he has to wait to get his and his mum's emotions out of the way before he puts his foot down.
* [[Clyde]] enters, sings happy birthday to 'Mister [[Sonichu]]'.
* Chris asks if he's going to be hurt or arrested when he goes to Cleveland.
* Clyde says he only wants to make sure he will never touch a woman; as he's not a man. He welcomes Chris to Miscreant HQ.
* Chris is going to talk to his mom and will come to Cleveland in the next few days.
* Clyde says he's doing this because Chris is a terrible person.
* Julie is not a captive, she's having the time of her life.
* Chris is off to eat and rest for the funeral. Clyde will send chocolates. Chris will talk to his mum after the funeral.

==Transcript==

{{quote|Yeah, but then my Mom is pretty much jealous of me loving another woman more than her.|Chris, describing his Oedipus complex}}

'''Fan 1''': From what I read there's a way to take ownership of the files that are unaccounted for. 
'''Chris''': Hey everybody, I have- I have a question. 
'''Fan 2''': From my understanding Max took Julie over to what is called "HQ". 
'''Fan 3''': Headquarters? 
'''Chris''': And uh, yeah. And uh, Clyde is setting things up over there. So is uh, just wanna know is Clyde planning on, like, to hurt me or get me into jail or anything like that if I go over to Cleveland to pick up Julie myself over at the HQ? 
'''Fan''': I dunno. 
'''High-pitched Fan''': I'm not sure, I'm just doing homework. 
'''Fan''': Uh hey, let me fix something here. Hold on a minute. 
'''Chris''': Alright, so nobody here knows, knows uh, has anybody here actually been to this HQ? This headquarters? 
'''Fan''': I dunno I just got here 15 minutes ago. 
'''Fan''': I don't know what that is. 
'''High-pitched Fan''': I just got here, too. I'm doing homework right now. 
'''Chris''': ''[sigh]'' Ahhhh...yeah, uh, Max, Julie's brother, uh, pretty much spirited away Julie, took her to the HQ, to the Headquarters, where The Miscreants, I think they were called are, and now, uh, Max wants me to come over to Cleveland within the next five days to pick up Julie from the Headquarters. And I'm just trying to find out, uh, if Clyde is planning, if he's going to put me, going to try to force me in jail or hurt me or anything like that. 
'''Fan''': Hmmm. 
'''Fan''': Hmmm. 
'''High-pitched Fan''': That would be unfortunate. 
'''1Fan''': I highly doubt it. 
'''Chris''': Highly doubt it. 
'''1Fan''': From what it seems Clyde is just trying to scare you. 
'''Chris''': I see. 
'''Fan''': Yeah, I think he's lying. 
'''1Fan''': I think that if you actually go up there it would show him that you are very serious about, you know, your feelings towards Julie, I had a whole big list of things I was about to say now and they just went boom. So to just to the chase here I'd just say go for it. And I'm pretty sure, if anything, Clyde would actually shake your hand and say, "Congratulations, you've finally done it." 
'''Fan''': Yeah, you should go and show him that you truly care about your sweetheart. 
'''Chris''': ''[sigh]'' Ok. ''[long pause]'' Yeah, you see, one thing is, uh, I mean I-I understand is that it's like a 400 mile 7 hour drive, according to MapQuest, between my address and... Max's address? But, yeah well Julie is living with Max, her older brother. Yeah, but anyway I was, anyway I was, still feeling like insecure about the trip, especially since like uh, you know even though I am an adult, I should respect my mother's and my father's wishes. And uh, still a little bit on the, you know, still gonna need a few dollars to get me to uh, Cleveland. 
'''1Fan''': Chris, I'm gonna say this. 
'''Chris''': Yes. I'm listening. 
'''1Fan''': If you truly love someone. Truly in your heart love someone, no force in the world, be it distance, be it a physical obstacle, anything, can stop you from being with that person. And protecting that person that you care about that much. This is one of life's little tests, Chris. And you need to take it head on. 
'''Fan''': Yeah. And I guess in less than 20 minutes you'll be 27. 
'''1Fan''': Happy birthday, by the way. 
'''Chris''': Actually, actually, thank you, actually, I was born at 5:30 in the morning. [long pause] Actually I understand love is priceless. But you gotta understand that there are limits on uh, on the distance. I mean love is priceless, but you know, I have to do all the work to get there. 
'''Fan''': Chris? Chris, what kind of mileage does your car get? 
'''Chris''': 35 highway. 25 city. 
'''High-pitched fan''': That's pretty good! 
'''Fan''': I wouldn't worry about it. And if you do get caught in some kind of trouble there are nice people out there that can help you. You have a cell phone, right? 
'''Chris''': Um, ok. Yeah. 
'''Fan''': There you go! You have no problem, man. 
'''Chris''': Yeah listen, that's another thing, that my mom, y'know my mom is like you know, she's gonna be telling me, don't go, don't go, I worry about you, and she [[Obesity|watches a lot of television]] and it's like I'm trying, I've been trying, to get her to let me go to Julie in Cleveland... 
'''Fan''': Chris, I think you have to show your mom that you truly love Julie. 
'''Chris''': Yeah, but then my mom is also a bit jealous of me loving another woman... more than her. I mean I know, I mean I understand she's in a situation like, "cut the umbilical cord" you would say, I'm sure. But still, I have to respect my mother, very much. 
'''1Fan''': Well, Chris, you pay them for your room and board, right? 
'''Chris''': Yeah. 
'''1Fan''': Is there anything they do to support you that you don't pay for? Other than just, their moral support. 
'''Chris''': They uh, they give me food, and they uh, they also pay for my gas as well. And plus the car I drive is actually my mother's car. 
'''Fan''': Oh... 
'''1Fan''': Sorry, I gotta use voice activity because I'm tired of pressing my button here. And I'm gonna go on a rant here. Chris, I'm going to tell you a little story. Um, I've had the same problem back when I was younger, back when I was 18... 
'''Chris''': ''[Interrupts]'' Alright but uh, alright... 
'''1Fan''': When I turned 18. Let me tell you this, because it's very relevant to the situation. 
'''Chris''': Let me just say, uh, a thing though. It's like, I don't want to leave home without saying goodbye, though. That's not the kind of person I am. It's that I want to give my mom at least a notice-amount of time that, like, y'know, I'm going over to Cleveland, and I wanna uh, make sure I have uh, her consent, like you know, she's saying "it's alright, have a safe trip, come back soon." It's not like uh, I mean at this point she doesn't want me to go. But I'm just sayin'. Hey, unmute the rascal, please. 
'''1Fan''': ''[Laughs once]'' 
'''Muffled Fan''': It was just echo. 
'''Chris''': Oh uh, I'm sorry. Anyway I'm done, you understood me there, rascal, right? 
'''Troll''': It's 5:30 in the morning where, exactly? 
'''Chris''': 5:30 Eastern Standard Time I was born in [[Honest Content|Martha Jefferson Hospital]] in [[Charlottesville]]. 
'''Fan''': Thank you! 
'''Other fan''': That's what I needed. 
'''1Fan''': Ok. [pauses] 
'''Muffled Fan''': ''[Says something like "it won't cost that much money, it's not that big a trip, I've taken"]'' 
'''Chris''': Yeah, but also, you know she does worry about me and I could be set up to be hurt, or turned into the police and arrested when I get there. 
'''Fan''': What would you have to do to be taken by the police? 
'''Chris''': Yeah, but also, uh, same thing happened before when I was about to go to [[Blanca]]. My mom didn't want me to go because it could have been a setup, like she would have been setting me up, like she would have been [[Pedofork|underaged]], and then right there I'd be turned into the police. 
'''Fan''': That's entrapment, Chris. 
'''Chris''': Yeah, but y'know, I can tell in my heart that Julie is 19. I mean, I'm sure that Max can vouch for her age. Because you know, even though she did send me her ID, her scanned ID as an image, her birthdate is blurred out. So it's hard to tell the year. 
'''Fan''': Besides Chris, have you ever seen ''[[Wikipedia:To Catch a Predator|To Catch a Predator]]?'' Whenever they do their sting operations, they always have their fake underage boy or girl, whatever, always tells the person multiple times that they are not of legal age, it's like "Oh yeah, you know I'm 13 right?" And the person doesn't care. Which is why they get caught with child pornography or whatever charges they get caught on. 
'''Chris''': Alright, well, she repeatedly told me, she repeatedly informed me she was 19. 
'''Fan''': So if it was in fact a sting operation of some kind, you would be charged with nothing. Because you were not told she was underage. Besides, all of us already know she actually is 19. 
'''Fan''': Mmm hm. 
'''Chris''': Alright. Yeah. Yeah. Wait a moment, I'll be right back, okay? I'll be right back. 
'''High-pitched troll''': Anyone know how to do quadratic equations? 
'''Fan''': I haven't done those since I was in high school. I don't remember. 
'''Chris''': ''[Sound of Chris clumsily sitting back down at his computer and letting out a small sigh]'' I just went downstairs to see if I could bring my mom up here so she could talk to y'all but she's asleep right now. 
'''Max''': ''[Diabolical laughter]'' 
'''Fan''': What the? 
'''Chris''': Wait a minute, just a moment ago did I just hear Max, who quotes himself as being named Julie's brother, did he just give an evil laugh? 
'''Fan''': I think so. 
'''Fan''': Looks like it. 
'''Chris''': Yeah, so that just brings up some suspicion right there. I mean I'm just doing... you did not have to mute him to hear what he had to say! Oh, he just told me on Skype he's watching [[Family Guy]]. 
'''Fan''': Which episode? 
'''Chris''': He says "Mine... thing is on voice activated" Oh, it's the one... oh, I love that episode! It's the one where Meg sings. Becomes a pop star. Gets a makeover. 
'''High-pitched troll''': Oh, I remember that one! 
'''Chris''': Yeah, I have that episode downloaded on my [[PS3|Playstation 3]]. 
'''Fan''': Chris, now is probably the best time if you're gonna actually go and do this, to do it. I know your mom's asleep, but... 
'''Chris''': I cannot do it now, I have to go to my aunt Corina's funeral this afternoon. 
'''1Fan''': True. It's just kind of part of life. In a sense. 
'''Fan''': God is testing you on your 27th birthday, Chris. 
'''Chris''': ''[sigh]'' He's tested me before on the same situation as well. But yeah I guess I should talk to my mom better about that. You know tell her that I'll let her know that I have been assured numerously that it's not a setup. I mean even Max will back me up on that. 
'''1Fan''': Chris, what if she says no? 
'''Chris''': Really. Hmm. Really. Hmm. So what you're saying here is all the times I've received calls from trolls, telling me to F-off, or I'm a S-head, they've just been basically wanting me to prove myself and not out to hurt me or anything. 
'''Fan''': Did you receive any calls today or something? 
'''Chris''': Yeah. It's just that I received a call earlier, and that's where I learned Max found [[Sex tape|the video I sent to Julie of her own consent]], she asked me to send her a video, and then you see, he said it got uploaded to YouTube, so I assume that uh, I mean at first I was shocked but then realized that since her brother, uh, Max was a troll at himself at one point or another that he probably found it and uploaded it. 
'''Fan''': Um, Chris. 
'''Chris''': And also, on that note, the girl who called me to tell me about that, uh, accused Julie of being a troll herself on that note. 
'''Fan''': Was she? She can't be a troll. 
'''Chris''': Yeah, I know. I believed- I mean, I believe in Julie and I still believe in her that she is not a troll, and that she is a wonderful, sweet caring 19-year-old, who wrote me, who hand-wrote me a very nice letter, and sent it to me in the mail, and sent me her printed pictures that her friend took of her. 
'''Fan''': Yeah. Yeah. She wouldn't be interested in trolling. She's been trolled all her life by the Georgian government. Based on what she told me. 
'''Chris''': I'm sorry could you repeat that? 
'''Fan''': She doesn't have time to be a troll, she's been trolled all her life by the Georgian government. 
'''Chris''': The Georg- OH, the country of Georgia. Yeah, I did research on that when I was trying to find Molvania on a map. 
'''Screwhead''': It's weird, my books, my old books have Molvania on the maps. 
'''Fan''': You couldn't find it? 
'''Chris''': So wait a minute Screwhead, you're saying that you have a book, that has Molvania? 
'''Fan''': That's funny, I was told it was unrecognized. 
'''Screwhead''': I have old books, but maybe the Mexican government is to recognize a country. You know, different from the American government. 
'''Chris''': Say, Screwhead, can you uh, can you uh, darn the echo, but anyway, could you find on the internet, a map of Molvania and its neighboring countries? I mean because I can tell right now that it's been neighboring Georgia. From what I understand, from what Julie told me, and her other friend told me as well. 
'''Screwhead''': Chris, you know that Mexico's not a very developed country. It didn't have internet until a couple years ago. So I'm pretty sure that... 
'''Chris''': ''[Loudly interrupts]'' Yeah, I understand that, I understand, I also understand that Molvania's 50 miles radius. 
'''Fan''': So I don't think I can find it. The old books are long gone. We had to burn them because we had to heat our house with fire, and we had to burn them. 
'''Chris''': [[Chris and remorse|Oh, that's sad,]] but I'm talkin' 'bout, you know, I'm asking if you know where I can find a map like you had in your books on the internet. 
'''1Fan''': You would just have to look around, I would assume. 
'''Chris''': You know what, I did internet searches, but it's like I find a map of Molvania, the country, but I'm not finding a map of Molvania and its ''neighboring'' countries. 
'''Fan''': I'm so sorry Chris but I don't think I can find it, I don't think there's a scan or something of the book, it's like, a schoolbook or something and they change every year, it's, I don't think so, sorry. 
'''Chris''': I see. Um, but listen, Max is telling me that he is not a troll and he uh, ask y'all what they think, because he said that y'all don't seem to care. 
'''Fan''': Mmm. I dunno. 
'''Chris''': Oh, oh. He said tell them that he ''is'' a troll. I misread it. 
'''Fan''': Uh... 
'''Fan''': Chris, you said that some trolls came in here earlier. What did they tell you? 
'''Chris''': Clyde was a [client?] among that group. Whole buncha stuff. They got to me emotionally. So it's hard for me to remember the details. 
'''Fan''': Oh. I see. I'm sorry, Chris. You should enforce security on this channel. 
'''1Fan''': Did you get any calls from the trolls today? 
'''Chris''': Yeah but ayway. Just answer Max's question, he sent, you know, he is a troll, and what you think, because y'all don't seem to care what he's saying here. 
'''1Fan''': What's he gonna do? 
'''Fan''': We can't do anything. 
'''High-pitched Troll''': He's a bad boy. 
'''Fan''': He's a bad boy, but I don't think you can do anything about that. 
'''Chris''': I told them what you did, Max. About spirting away Julie. To headquarters. To your headquarters. 
'''1Fan''': Chris, like I said earlier this is them testing you. We really can't do much but give you our support. 
'''Fan''': Mmm hm. 
'''1Fan''': We can sit there and shout at the trolls all we want, but, in the end, this is up to you, man. ''You'' have to go out and do something. ''You've'' got to get her back. 
'''Fan''': This is the start of a new life for you. In about six hours. 
'''Chris''': Oh, he said you'd prefer if I can call it ''Miscreant'' Headquarters. ''[Chris gets confused]'' Oh, actually he says ''he'd'' prefer it if I called it Miscreant Headquarters. 
'''1Fan''': ''[Mock contempt]'' I don't care what they are. 
'''Fan''': You could Google it. It's like an organization, right? Maybe they have a web page or something 
'''Chris''': ''[General sighing noises]'' 
'''Fan''': Rascal is not interested. 
'''1Fan''': Rascal is more interested in things like soda. 
''[Laughter from the Trolls and Chris]'' 
'''Chris''': That's a little funny. I'm just not in the mood to laugh right now. 
'''1Fan''': Well, I mean, we don't blame you. It's kinda a serious situation you're in right now. 
'''Fan''': I think I found the website. Hold on a second. 
'''Chris''': Uh, don't worry about looking it. He told me to Google it, so I'm loading my web browser now. 
'''Fan''': It's ''[unintelligible]'' only. I don't know if you can find it, really. 
'''1Fan''': Chris, can I tell you a story? 
'''Chris''': Alright, once upon a time... 
'''1Fan''': Its not really a 'Once upon a time' kinda story. I meant to tell you this earlier, but I mean I got kinda cut off. 
'''Chris''': I understand, so, uh, what's the story?. 
'''1Fan''': I was in a similar situation as you. Um, not as serious as this but still in the whole case of um, y'know, having conflicting interests between parents and my own personal interests. Um, basically what it ended up with was, I left my house. Um, I had just turned eighteen and I didn't feel that a rule that was set by my parents was too logical, in a sense. Its like you can't enforce home rule- like, parental rules on a child if he's not a child anymore. So I was told "don't come home." So I didn't. I stayed out of the house for almost a week. I survived off of twenty dollars, and stayed at a friend's house. Kept going to school and everything. Um, and one day my mom called me crying, apologizing for putting me through that. And since then she's had nothing but respect for me. Because she knows that if she were to do that again I could easily survive. And now you're in the same situation right now. Your mom is holding you back, she's holding you from getting what you want, getting what you need. And you really need to... you really need to break that. You need to cut that cord. And its gonna hurt at first, yeah. It's gonna hurt both of you. But once it's over with... 
'''Chris''': ''[sighs heavily]'' 
'''1Fan''': ...things will be much better, and you will both be so much happier, and you will have Julie. 
'''Chris''': I see. Yeah. Alright. Yeah I just put up, I just co-I just put up a link to the route myself, it's the miscreant page I just found. 
''[pause]'' 
'''Chris''': ''[sighs]'' 
'''Fan''': Found something? ''[pause]'' Oh...oh.<bt />
'''Chris''': Oh 
'''F1''': Their leader is a cat 
'''F2''': hahaha 
'''Chris''': A cat? 
'''F2''': Yeah 
'''F1''': I (something) these guys seriously because their leader is a cat 
'''F2''': Yeah, their leader is a kitty. A fluffy kitty with a person (something) 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] Well this... You Know that's funny because uh... Yes I'm not seeing the cat on the uh what I'm having, but I'm reading both the link I copy and pasted from the skype window and the link the he posted, that max himself typed in and it's the same thing. and uh I'm not seeing the cat 
'''Chris''': Oh 
'''F2''': Yeah, that's what we're looking at 
'''Chris''': Oh, yeah I see that 
'''F3''': Looks like they're pretty organised, you know this troll 
'''F1''': Look at their code names 
'''Chris''': Yeah, I'm checking out their operations , let's see. Um. [begins to read from the site]Alright operations E, say. Operative Evan. Status alive and enjoying life. Go test the waters of the one known as chris chan notable accomplishments. Yeah uhh 
'''Chris''': Masturbating and Squirting 
'''F2''': Hmmm 
'''Chris''': Then operation jay, that's jason. Alive and having sex, Compile information on the one known as Chris Chan. hacking the emails. Then operation B. Blanca. Alive and smoking. test the vulnerability of the one known as chirs chan. Destroy the medallion. Operation P, Panda. Alive and at my side, discovered a sexual nature. Gained a free PSP. I sent her that from my own heart. It was a pink PSP that I had originally gotten it for Megan but then she dumped me and I just held on to it for a while and I uh sent it to her so... shoot 
'''F3''': Chris, are this true, did this really happen to you? 
'''Chris''': uh what? 
'''F3''': The things that they say they've done here, they're pretty awful you know 
'''Chris''': Uh yeah, Uh yeah some, yea most of which yeah, and then opera- operative L, uhh name lord, public name, uhh, name, say that, uhh name the lord and in practice he says the female, and then the public name the man in the pickle suit, status unknown know operatives, get-obtain sensitive documents of the one known as chris chan, and a notable accomplishment, getting nude pictures and a dvd. Known as operative L. I mean how can I see these at uhh on the website here that I'm looking at. The uh miscreants page that I uh, that the link is on, on the side here yeah I'm looking at that website. I just read you the four operations and the operative that they had 
'''F2''': hmmm (something) 
'''F2''': the cat with a person (something) in it 
'''F3''': It's a cute cat 
'''High Pitch Fan''': It's adorable 
'''Chris''': It's a cat, that's all I was going to say 
'''Chris''': Uh it's probably from a movie or something, or it could be a youtube video, or any generic gif 
'''Chris''': [''Typing''] hmm so anyway those of yall who just saw this web pa- uh this website, d'yall still feel that they're (burp) scuse me, d'yall still feel that uh 
'''F1''': [''Interrupting'']That they're harmless? 
'''Chris''': d'yall still feel, well yeah they're harmless for one thing but uh, basically if they;re just testing me they want me to come out there and that they're not gonna do any harm to me 
'''F1''': from looking at their operations, what have they done that's really that serious, They've had, I mean they have all this information on you right, they could have done so much worse to you in the past and they still haven't done it, either they're afraid of you or they're trying to just test you, I'm going to go with just test you 
'''Chris''': Uhh yeah but yeah but yall did see the Ed Page, 
Fans either say yes or no 
'''Chris''':That is pretty much the majority of the work there with those documents, and uh information 
'''F4''': I avoid it, 
'''F2''': Yeaahhh you got to forget about it 
'''F4''': I avoid it because ed is ''[Chris is heard over the top here with a loud AHHHHHHH]'' by ed shitheads 
'''F2''': what's done is done, you must move on 
'''Chris''': Yeah, I'm just saying they have done something, they done things with that information, I'm suppose you're right they could of done worse but you know the worse their doing is preventing me from getting a job because that ED page is practically the first thing now days that's looked up when you punch in my name in a google search or any related search, search... uh search sites 
''''Chris'': sigh, well I appreciate yall's input so let me just see if I remember what I've learned, yeah, I should definitely, try to, let my, try to (something) let my mum know that I'm going to pick up julie, that I should tell here that I should be back in like a certain amount of timer or uh days 
'''F1''': It shouldn't take you more than two days, it's true 
'''Chris''': Yeah that's depending, that's depending if I start in the morning, anyway yeah in addition to that I should definitely that I have her, that I have the continual monetary support. But I ah because you know I'm still going to need the money for the gas to and fro. And (something) expense and the wealth of money I could (something) 
'''F1''': Chris what you just need to worry about now is asserting yourself towards your mother, you really gotta put your foot down man 
''[F2 and F1 talk over each other for a bit]'' 
'''F1''': She's gotta respect you on your birthday, it's your special day man 
'''Chris''': Yeah but it's also, but this yeah it's also my Aunt Corina's day because it's her funeral, so I gotta let that pass before it and get my emotions and let her get her emotions outta the way and then i can put my foot down. Hello Cylde 
'''Chris''': Yeah yeah, Hello to clyde 
'''F4''': oh wait clyde's here 
'''F2''': Uh ohhh 
'''Clyde''': Happy Birthday to you, Happy birthday to you, happy birthday Mr. Sonichu, happy birthday to you 
'''F2''': Ohhhhh dear 
'''Chris''': Oh well listen clyde I've just been I've waiting patiently and talking to these nice people here, but anyway I just wanted to hear from you that uh I come pick up julie, I'm not gonna, I just wanted to hear from you that I'm not gonna get harmed or turned into the police or anything like that 
'''Clyde''': Of course not we're just gonna make sure that you never ever ever you know, uhh I've been drinking, anyway, never touch a woman because uh you know, you're not a man 
'''Chris''': uhh yeah but basically I'm allowed to pick up julie over at you headquarters 
'''Clyde''': Sure if you can do that, I dunno if you can drive or anything, driving must be pretty hard for you 
'''Chris''': Yeah well I can, Yeah well as I have told these nice people uh yeah I'm gonna talk to my mother some more and put my foot down and uh you know make my own and hopefully I'll get uh I'll have the money on me for the gas that I need for the trip, and uh you know within the next few days I will come down to Cleveland and pick up julie myself 
'''Clyde''': Well bring your love man, because love's like, love's like a bunch of stuff you know 
'''F5''': Clyde, clyde why are you doing this? Why are you doing this? 
'''Clyde''': Why am I doing this? well uh yeah well uh because chris is a terrible person, he's like lied to me and stuff 
'''F5''': He's not a terrible person, he's my hero 
'''Clyde''': Well you have a terrible hero, pick superman, superman's awesome 
'''Chris''': Yeah well but uh let me see if I can put it more simpler terms, as uh, compared to what all yeall nice people have described for me, Clyde you have you basically just want to test me for being a true person and that's why you're holding julie captive in your headquarters 
'''Clyde''': She's not really captive, she's having the time of her life, we've given ever god damn loving you couldn't provide (evil laughter) 
'''Chris''': well anyway you basically want me to test my love for julie and uh so and uh you just want me to finally show that I'm a man and that I can stand up myself and do what I want like a man should and uh that;s basically it in a nutshell isn't it? 
'''Clyde''': Sure, that's perfect 
'''Chris''': Ok alright well listen I gotta go get something to eat and the I should rest up for the funeral so another time I'll come back into the mumble, but you know shortly after I will, shortly after the funeral I will be coming down to uh Cleveland and I will pick julie up, and I will have her and me spend a little time together, maybe uh maybe over at max's house, and then I'll be bring her back here. My house 
'''Clyde''': Ok if you do make it I'll give you a box of chocolates, a box of chocolates 
'''Chris''': Uh you don't have, you don't have to give me anything, maybe jsut a handshake, a promise that you'll uh disband this organisation and that uh you'll 
'''Clyde''': [''Interrupting'']Sure bro 
'''Chris''': Ok alright, ok we'll i'll talk to my mum later and put my foot down because right now she's sleeping and then I have the funeral to worry about, but after the funeral I will 
'''Clyde''': alright bro, have fun 
'''Chris''': alright yeah ok, well the majority of yall take care and you know just mingle amongst yourselves for now
''[Chris leaves]'' 
[Chat room erupts with everyone speaking over each other]

{{Transcription}}

{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 9.5|Mumble Chat 9.5]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 11|Mumble Chat 11]]|}}

==Links==
[http://www.mediafire.com/?uwwmmnll2ny Download]

{{FanChats}}
[[Category:Mumble chats]]

Mumble 10

2010-04-26T12:17:01Z

Big Fucking Whoopie:

{{quote|I can tell in my heart that Julie is 19. I'm sure that Max can vouch for her age.|Chris}}

The tenth of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]]. The [[Trolls|loyal fanbase]] try to persuade Chris to travel to Cleveland to rescue Julie from the clutches of her evil brother, Max. Chris (and his mother) have some doubts, mostly that it is a sting operation in the manner of ''To Catch a Predator'' (which had stopped filming by 2009). One of the trolls tries to tell Chris an anecdote about independence and asserting yourself to gain the respect of your parents as you grow up, but Chris interrupts him and talks over his story.

==Summary==
* Trolls talk on an unrelated subject before [[Chris]] arrives.
* Chris says that [[Max]] took Julie to HQ, and asks if he could be hurt or jailed for going to pick her up. Trolls aren't sure.
* None of them have heard of HQ.
* Chris has 5 days to pick Julie up from [[The Miscreants|Miscreant]] HQ in Cleveland, Ohio.
* A troll says that [[Clyde]] is testing Chris's love for [[Julie]], and he should go.
* Chris whines about the 400 mile, seven-hour drive.
* He's 'feeling insecure' about the trip. Even though he's an adult, he should respect his parents' wishes.
* A troll says that no force can keep true love apart.
* It's [[Christian Love Day|Chris's birthday]] tomorrow, he was born at 5:30 in the morning.
* '''Chris says that love is priceless, but he has to do all the work to get to Cleveland.'''
* His [[Barb|mum]] will say not to go, and is worried. He can't convince her to let him go.
* '''Barb is jealous of Chris loving another woman more than her. He has to respect her wishes.'''
* '''His parents pay for his gas. [[Son-Chu]] is Barb's car.'''
* Chris was born at 5:30 EST at Martha Jefferson Hospital, Charlottesville.
* Barb is worried about Chris being set up to be hurt or turned into the police.
* She said the same thing when he was going to visit Blanca - She could be [[pedofork|underaged]] and Chris could be arrested.
* '''Chris can tell in his heart that Julie is 19. Max can vouch for her age. In her scanned ID picture, the year was blurred out.'''
* Trolls compare 'To Catch a Predator' - The person always tells the suspect that they are underage. Chris wouldn't be charged, as they all know Julie is 19.
* Chris leaves.
* Chris returns. Max cackles evilly. Sounds like canned laughter. This makes Chris suspicious about the trip.
* Max is watching [[Family Guy]] Chris gets distracted and starts talking about the episode, saying he loves it.
* [[Aunt Corina]]'s funeral is later; he can't go now.
* Trolls say that this is a birthday test from God and he should go. Chris insists on talking to his mom first.
* Max has intercepted the [[sex tape|video]] that Chris made for Julie. '''The girl who told him this says that Julie is also a troll.'''
* The trolls say that this can't be true. Chris agrees.
* '''He believes in her, Julie is a wonderful sweet 19 year old who wrote him a very nice letter and sent it in the mail with pictures that her friend took.'''
* A troll says that Julie wouldn't be a troll, she's been trolled her whole life by the Georgian government.
* Chris researched Georgia when looking for [[Molvania]]. A troll says that his schoolbooks had a map of [[Molvania]].
* The troll no longer has a map, he had to burn his schoolbooks to heat his house.
* Chris has seen a map of Molvania, but not its surrounding countries.
* Max says he isn't a troll.
* Wait, Chris misread. He is a troll.
* A troll references [[Mumble 9.5]]. Chris says that they got to him emotionally so he can't remember the details.
* The trolls can't do anything about Max. He is a bad boy. One suggests googling [[The Miscreants]].
* A troll makes a joke. Chris laughs, says that it's funny, but says he isn't in the mood to laugh.
* A troll asks Chris if he can tell a story. Chris interrupts: "Sure. Once upon a time..."
* Chris is looking at [[The Miscreants]]' website.
* Chris looks over Miscreant operatives and operations, detailing various acts of trolling against him. He seems to have minimal reaction to this list of various 'friends' and what they were assigned to get from him.
* [[PandaHalo]] being alive yields no response.
* The trolls says that nothing on the site is too bad. The Miscreants are either afraid of or testing Chris.
* Chris says that the [[ED]] page stops him from getting a job.
* Chris thanks the trolls for their input. He'll update his mom and ask for gas money.
* The trolls says that he needs to assert himself against his mother; she should respect him on his birthday.
* Chris says today is [[Aunt Corina]]'s funeral, so he has to wait to get his and his mum's emotions out of the way before he puts his foot down.
* [[Clyde]] enters, sings happy birthday to 'Mister [[Sonichu]]'.
* Chris asks if he's going to be hurt or arrested when he goes to Cleveland.
* Clyde says he only wants to make sure he will never touch a woman; as he's not a man. He welcomes Chris to Miscreant HQ.
* Chris is going to talk to his mom and will come to Cleveland in the next few days.
* Clyde says he's doing this because Chris is a terrible person.
* Julie is not a captive, she's having the time of her life.
* Chris is off to eat and rest for the funeral. Clyde will send chocolates. Chris will talk to his mum after the funeral.

==Transcript==

{{quote|Yeah, but then my Mom is pretty much jealous of me loving another woman more than her.|Chris, describing his Oedipus complex}}

'''Fan 1''': From what I read there's a way to take ownership of the files that are unaccounted for. 
'''Chris''': Hey everybody, I have- I have a question. 
'''Fan 2''': From my understanding Max took Julie over to what is called "HQ". 
'''Fan 3''': Headquarters? 
'''Chris''': And uh, yeah. And uh, Clyde is setting things up over there. So is uh, just wanna know is Clyde planning on, like, to hurt me or get me into jail or anything like that if I go over to Cleveland to pick up Julie myself over at the HQ? 
'''Fan''': I dunno. 
'''High-pitched Fan''': I'm not sure, I'm just doing homework. 
'''Fan''': Uh hey, let me fix something here. Hold on a minute. 
'''Chris''': Alright, so nobody here knows, knows uh, has anybody here actually been to this HQ? This headquarters? 
'''Fan''': I dunno I just got here 15 minutes ago. 
'''Fan''': I don't know what that is. 
'''High-pitched Fan''': I just got here, too. I'm doing homework right now. 
'''Chris''': ''[sigh]'' Ahhhh...yeah, uh, Max, Julie's brother, uh, pretty much spirited away Julie, took her to the HQ, to the Headquarters, where The Miscreants, I think they were called are, and now, uh, Max wants me to come over to Cleveland within the next five days to pick up Julie from the Headquarters. And I'm just trying to find out, uh, if Clyde is planning, if he's going to put me, going to try to force me in jail or hurt me or anything like that. 
'''Fan''': Hmmm. 
'''Fan''': Hmmm. 
'''High-pitched Fan''': That would be unfortunate. 
'''1Fan''': I highly doubt it. 
'''Chris''': Highly doubt it. 
'''1Fan''': From what it seems Clyde is just trying to scare you. 
'''Chris''': I see. 
'''Fan''': Yeah, I think he's lying. 
'''1Fan''': I think that if you actually go up there it would show him that you are very serious about, you know, your feelings towards Julie, I had a whole big list of things I was about to say now and they just went boom. So to just to the chase here I'd just say go for it. And I'm pretty sure, if anything, Clyde would actually shake your hand and say, "Congratulations, you've finally done it." 
'''Fan''': Yeah, you should go and show him that you truly care about your sweetheart. 
'''Chris''': ''[sigh]'' Ok. ''[long pause]'' Yeah, you see, one thing is, uh, I mean I-I understand is that it's like a 400 mile 7 hour drive, according to MapQuest, between my address and... Max's address? But, yeah well Julie is living with Max, her older brother. Yeah, but anyway I was, anyway I was, still feeling like insecure about the trip, especially since like uh, you know even though I am an adult, I should respect my mother's and my father's wishes. And uh, still a little bit on the, you know, still gonna need a few dollars to get me to uh, Cleveland. 
'''1Fan''': Chris, I'm gonna say this. 
'''Chris''': Yes. I'm listening. 
'''1Fan''': If you truly love someone. Truly in your heart love someone, no force in the world, be it distance, be it a physical obstacle, anything, can stop you from being with that person. And protecting that person that you care about that much. This is one of life's little tests, Chris. And you need to take it head on. 
'''Fan''': Yeah. And I guess in less than 20 minutes you'll be 27. 
'''1Fan''': Happy birthday, by the way. 
'''Chris''': Actually, actually, thank you, actually, I was born at 5:30 in the morning. [long pause] Actually I understand love is priceless. But you gotta understand that there are limits on uh, on the distance. I mean love is priceless, but you know, I have to do all the work to get there. 
'''Fan''': Chris? Chris, what kind of mileage does your car get? 
'''Chris''': 35 highway. 25 city. 
'''High-pitched fan''': That's pretty good! 
'''Fan''': I wouldn't worry about it. And if you do get caught in some kind of trouble there are nice people out there that can help you. You have a cell phone, right? 
'''Chris''': Um, ok. Yeah. 
'''Fan''': There you go! You have no problem, man. 
'''Chris''': Yeah listen, that's another thing, that my mom, y'know my mom is like you know, she's gonna be telling me, don't go, don't go, I worry about you, and she [[Obesity|watches a lot of television]] and it's like I'm trying, I've been trying, to get her to let me go to Julie in Cleveland... 
'''Fan''': Chris, I think you have to show your mom that you truly love Julie. 
'''Chris''': Yeah, but then my mom is also a bit jealous of me loving another woman... more than her. I mean I know, I mean I understand she's in a situation like, "cut the umbilical cord" you would say, I'm sure. But still, I have to respect my mother, very much. 
'''1Fan''': Well, Chris, you pay them for your room and board, right? 
'''Chris''': Yeah. 
'''1Fan''': Is there anything they do to support you that you don't pay for? Other than just, their moral support. 
'''Chris''': They uh, they give me food, and they uh, they also pay for my gas as well. And plus the car I drive is actually my mother's car. 
'''Fan''': Oh... 
'''1Fan''': Sorry, I gotta use voice activity because I'm tired of pressing my button here. And I'm gonna go on a rant here. Chris, I'm going to tell you a little story. Um, I've had the same problem back when I was younger, back when I was 18... 
'''Chris''': ''[Interrupts]'' Alright but uh, alright... 
'''1Fan''': When I turned 18. Let me tell you this, because it's very relevant to the situation. 
'''Chris''': Let me just say, uh, a thing though. It's like, I don't want to leave home without saying goodbye, though. That's not the kind of person I am. It's that I want to give my mom at least a notice-amount of time that, like, y'know, I'm going over to Cleveland, and I wanna uh, make sure I have uh, her consent, like you know, she's saying "it's alright, have a safe trip, come back soon." It's not like uh, I mean at this point she doesn't want me to go. But I'm just sayin'. Hey, unmute the rascal, please. 
'''1Fan''': ''[Laughs once]'' 
'''Muffled Fan''': It was just echo. 
'''Chris''': Oh uh, I'm sorry. Anyway I'm done, you understood me there, rascal, right? 
'''Troll''': It's 5:30 in the morning where, exactly? 
'''Chris''': 5:30 Eastern Standard Time I was born in [[Honest Content|Martha Jefferson Hospital]] in [[Charlottesville]]. 
'''Fan''': Thank you! 
'''Other fan''': That's what I needed. 
'''1Fan''': Ok. [pauses] 
'''Muffled Fan''': ''[Says something like "it won't cost that much money, it's not that big a trip, I've taken"]'' 
'''Chris''': Yeah, but also, you know she does worry about me and I could be set up to be hurt, or turned into the police and arrested when I get there. 
'''Fan''': What would you have to do to be taken by the police? 
'''Chris''': Yeah, but also, uh, same thing happened before when I was about to go to [[Blanca]]. My mom didn't want me to go because it could have been a setup, like she would have been setting me up, like she would have been [[Pedofork|underaged]], and then right there I'd be turned into the police. 
'''Fan''': That's entrapment, Chris. 
'''Chris''': Yeah, but y'know, I can tell in my heart that Julie is 19. I mean, I'm sure that Max can vouch for her age. Because you know, even though she did send me her ID, her scanned ID as an image, her birthdate is blurred out. So it's hard to tell the year. 
'''Fan''': Besides Chris, have you ever seen ''[[Wikipedia:To Catch a Predator|To Catch a Predator]]?'' Whenever they do their sting operations, they always have their fake underage boy or girl, whatever, always tells the person multiple times that they are not of legal age, it's like "Oh yeah, you know I'm 13 right?" And the person doesn't care. Which is why they get caught with child pornography or whatever charges they get caught on. 
'''Chris''': Alright, well, she repeatedly told me, she repeatedly informed me she was 19. 
'''Fan''': So if it was in fact a sting operation of some kind, you would be charged with nothing. Because you were not told she was underage. Besides, all of us already know she actually is 19. 
'''Fan''': Mmm hm. 
'''Chris''': Alright. Yeah. Yeah. Wait a moment, I'll be right back, okay? I'll be right back. 
'''High-pitched troll''': Anyone know how to do quadratic equations? 
'''Fan''': I haven't done those since I was in high school. I don't remember. 
'''Chris''': ''[Sound of Chris clumsily sitting back down at his computer and letting out a small sigh]'' I just went downstairs to see if I could bring my mom up here so she could talk to y'all but she's asleep right now. 
'''Max''': ''[Diabolical laughter]'' 
'''Fan''': What the? 
'''Chris''': Wait a minute, just a moment ago did I just hear Max, who quotes himself as being named Julie's brother, did he just give an evil laugh? 
'''Fan''': I think so. 
'''Fan''': Looks like it. 
'''Chris''': Yeah, so that just brings up some suspicion right there. I mean I'm just doing... you did not have to mute him to hear what he had to say! Oh, he just told me on Skype he's watching [[Family Guy]]. 
'''Fan''': Which episode? 
'''Chris''': He says "Mine... thing is on voice activated" Oh, it's the one... oh, I love that episode! It's the one where Meg sings. Becomes a pop star. Gets a makeover. 
'''High-pitched troll''': Oh, I remember that one! 
'''Chris''': Yeah, I have that episode downloaded on my [[PS3|Playstation 3]]. 
'''Fan''': Chris, now is probably the best time if you're gonna actually go and do this, to do it. I know your mom's asleep, but... 
'''Chris''': I cannot do it now, I have to go to my aunt Corina's funeral this afternoon. 
'''1Fan''': True. It's just kind of part of life. In a sense. 
'''Fan''': God is testing you on your 27th birthday, Chris. 
'''Chris''': ''[sigh]'' He's tested me before on the same situation as well. But yeah I guess I should talk to my mom better about that. You know tell her that I'll let her know that I have been assured numerously that it's not a setup. I mean even Max will back me up on that. 
'''1Fan''': Chris, what if she says no? 
'''Chris''': Really. Hmm. Really. Hmm. So what you're saying here is all the times I've received calls from trolls, telling me to F-off, or I'm a S-head, they've just been basically wanting me to prove myself and not out to hurt me or anything. 
'''Fan''': Did you receive any calls today or something? 
'''Chris''': Yeah. It's just that I received a call earlier, and that's where I learned Max found [[Sex tape|the video I sent to Julie of her own consent]], she asked me to send her a video, and then you see, he said it got uploaded to YouTube, so I assume that uh, I mean at first I was shocked but then realized that since her brother, uh, Max was a troll at himself at one point or another that he probably found it and uploaded it. 
'''Fan''': Um, Chris. 
'''Chris''': And also, on that note, the girl who called me to tell me about that, uh, accused Julie of being a troll herself on that note. 
'''Fan''': Was she? She can't be a troll. 
'''Chris''': Yeah, I know. I believed- I mean, I believe in Julie and I still believe in her that she is not a troll, and that she is a wonderful, sweet caring 19-year-old, who wrote me, who hand-wrote me a very nice letter, and sent it to me in the mail, and sent me her printed pictures that her friend took of her. 
'''Fan''': Yeah. Yeah. She wouldn't be interested in trolling. She's been trolled all her life by the Georgian government. Based on what she told me. 
'''Chris''': I'm sorry could you repeat that? 
'''Fan''': She doesn't have time to be a troll, she's been trolled all her life by the Georgian government. 
'''Chris''': The Georg- OH, the country of Georgia. Yeah, I did research on that when I was trying to find Molvania on a map. 
'''Screwhead''': It's weird, my books, my old books have Molvania on the maps. 
'''Fan''': You couldn't find it? 
'''Chris''': So wait a minute Screwhead, you're saying that you have a book, that has Molvania? 
'''Fan''': That's funny, I was told it was unrecognized. 
'''Screwhead''': I have old books, but maybe the Mexican government is to recognize a country. You know, different from the American government. 
'''Chris''': Say, Screwhead, can you uh, can you uh, darn the echo, but anyway, could you find on the internet, a map of Molvania and its neighboring countries? I mean because I can tell right now that it's been neighboring Georgia. From what I understand, from what Julie told me, and her other friend told me as well. 
'''Screwhead''': Chris, you know that Mexico's not a very developed country. It didn't have internet until a couple years ago. So I'm pretty sure that... 
'''Chris''': ''[Loudly interrupts]'' Yeah, I understand that, I understand, I also understand that Molvania's 50 miles radius. 
'''Fan''': So I don't think I can find it. The old books are long gone. We had to burn them because we had to heat our house with fire, and we had to burn them. 
'''Chris''': [[Chris and remorse|Oh, that's sad,]] but I'm talkin' 'bout, you know, I'm asking if you know where I can find a map like you had in your books on the internet. 
'''1Fan''': You would just have to look around, I would assume. 
'''Chris''': You know what, I did internet searches, but it's like I find a map of Molvania, the country, but I'm not finding a map of Molvania and its ''neighboring'' countries. 
'''Fan''': I'm so sorry Chris but I don't think I can find it, I don't think there's a scan or something of the book, it's like, a schoolbook or something and they change every year, it's, I don't think so, sorry. 
'''Chris''': I see. Um, but listen, Max is telling me that he is not a troll and he uh, ask y'all what they think, because he said that y'all don't seem to care. 
'''Fan''': Mmm. I dunno. 
'''Chris''': Oh, oh. He said tell them that he ''is'' a troll. I misread it. 
'''Fan''': Uh... 
'''Fan''': Chris, you said that some trolls came in here earlier. What did they tell you? 
'''Chris''': Clyde was a [client?] among that group. Whole buncha stuff. They got to me emotionally. So it's hard for me to remember the details. 
'''Fan''': Oh. I see. I'm sorry, Chris. You should enforce security on this channel. 
'''1Fan''': Did you get any calls from the trolls today? 
'''Chris''': Yeah but ayway. Just answer Max's question, he sent, you know, he is a troll, and what you think, because y'all don't seem to care what he's saying here. 
'''1Fan''': What's he gonna do? 
'''Fan''': We can't do anything. 
'''High-pitched Troll''': He's a bad boy. 
'''Fan''': He's a bad boy, but I don't think you can do anything about that. 
'''Chris''': I told them what you did, Max. About spirting away Julie. To headquarters. To your headquarters. 
'''1Fan''': Chris, like I said earlier this is them testing you. We really can't do much but give you our support. 
'''Fan''': Mmm hm. 
'''1Fan''': We can sit there and shout at the trolls all we want, but, in the end, this is up to you, man. ''You'' have to go out and do something. ''You've'' got to get her back. 
'''Fan''': This is the start of a new life for you. In about six hours. 
'''Chris''': Oh, he said you'd prefer if I can call it ''Miscreant'' Headquarters. ''[Chris gets confused]'' Oh, actually he says ''he'd'' prefer it if I called it Miscreant Headquarters. 
'''1Fan''': ''[Mock contempt]'' I don't care what they are. 
'''Fan''': You could Google it. It's like an organization, right? Maybe they have a web page or something 
'''Chris''': ''[General sighing noises]'' 
'''Fan''': Rascal is not interested. 
'''1Fan''': Rascal is more interested in things like soda. 
''[Laughter from the Trolls and Chris]'' 
'''Chris''': That's a little funny. I'm just not in the mood to laugh right now. 
'''1Fan''': Well, I mean, we don't blame you. It's kinda a serious situation you're in right now. 
'''Fan''': I think I found the website. Hold on a second. 
'''Chris''': Uh, don't worry about looking it. He told me to Google it, so I'm loading my web browser now. 
'''Fan''': It's ''[unintelligible]'' only. I don't know if you can find it, really. 
'''1Fan''': Chris, can I tell you a story? 
'''Chris''': Alright, once upon a time... 
'''1Fan''': Its not really a 'Once upon a time' kinda story. I meant to tell you this earlier, but I mean I got kinda cut off. 
'''Chris''': I understand, so, uh, what's the story?. 
'''1Fan''': I was in a similar situation as you. Um, not as serious as this but still in the whole case of um, y'know, having conflicting interests between parents and my own personal interests. Um, basically what it ended up with was, I left my house. Um, I had just turned eighteen and I didn't feel that a rule that was set by my parents was too logical, in a sense. Its like you can't enforce home rule- like, parental rules on a child if he's not a child anymore. So I was told "don't come home." So I didn't. I stayed out of the house for almost a week. I survived off of twenty dollars, and stayed at a friend's house. Kept going to school and everything. Um, and one day my mom called me crying, apologizing for putting me through that. And since then she's had nothing but respect for me. Because she knows that if she were to do that again I could easily survive. And now you're in the same situation right now. Your mom is holding you back, she's holding you from getting what you want, getting what you need. And you really need to... you really need to break that. You need to cut that cord. And its gonna hurt at first, yeah. It's gonna hurt both of you. But once it's over with... 
'''Chris''': ''[sighs heavily]'' 
'''1Fan''': ...things will be much better, and you will both be so much happier, and you will have Julie. 
'''Chris''': I see. Yeah. Alright. Yeah I just put up, I just co-I just put up a link to the route myself, it's the miscreant page I just found. 
''[pause]'' 
'''Chris''': ''[sighs]'' 
'''Fan''': Found something? ''[pause]'' Oh...oh.
'''Chris''': Oh 
'''F1''': Their leader is a cat 
'''F2''': hahaha 
'''Chris''': A cat? 
'''F2''': Yeah 
'''F1''': I (something) these guys seriously because their leader is a cat 
'''F2''': Yeah, their leader is a kitty. A fluffy kitty with a person (something) 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] Well this... You Know that's funny because uh... Yes I'm not seeing the cat on the uh what I'm having, but I'm reading both the link I copy and pasted from the skype window and the link the he posted, that max himself typed in and it's the same thing. and uh I'm not seeing the cat 
'''Chris''': Oh 
'''F2''': Yeah, that's what we're looking at 
'''Chris''': Oh, yeah I see that 
'''F3''': Looks like they're pretty organised, you know this troll 
'''F1''': Look at their code names 
'''Chris''': Yeah, I'm checking out their operations , let's see. Um. [begins to read from the site]Alright operations E, say. Operative Evan. Status alive and enjoying life. Go test the waters of the one known as chris chan notable accomplishments. Yeah uhh 
'''Chris''': Masturbating and Squirting 
'''F2''': Hmmm 
'''Chris''': Then operation jay, that's jason. Alive and having sex, Compile information on the one known as Chris Chan. hacking the emails. Then operation B. Blanca. Alive and smoking. test the vulnerability of the one known as chirs chan. Destroy the medallion. Operation P, Panda. Alive and at my side, discovered a sexual nature. Gained a free PSP. I sent her that from my own heart. It was a pink PSP that I had originally gotten it for Megan but then she dumped me and I just held on to it for a while and I uh sent it to her so... shoot 
'''F3''': Chris, are this true, did this really happen to you? 
'''Chris''': uh what? 
'''F3''': The things that they say they've done here, they're pretty awful you know 
'''Chris''': Uh yeah, Uh yeah some, yea most of which yeah, and then opera- operative L, uhh name lord, public name, uhh, name, say that, uhh name the lord and in practice he says the female, and then the public name the man in the pickle suit, status unknown know operatives, get-obtain sensitive documents of the one known as chris chan, and a notable accomplishment, getting nude pictures and a dvd. Known as operative L. I mean how can I see these at uhh on the website here that I'm looking at. The uh miscreants page that I uh, that the link is on, on the side here yeah I'm looking at that website. I just read you the four operations and the operative that they had 
'''F2''': hmmm (something) 
'''F2''': the cat with a person (something) in it 
'''F3''': It's a cute cat 
'''High Pitch Fan''': It's adorable 
'''Chris''': It's a cat, that's all I was going to say 
'''Chris''': Uh it's probably from a movie or something, or it could be a youtube video, or any generic gif 
'''Chris''': [''Typing''] hmm so anyway those of yall who just saw this web pa- uh this website, d'yall still feel that they're (burp) scuse me, d'yall still feel that uh 
'''F1''': [''Interrupting'']That they're harmless? 
'''Chris''': d'yall still feel, well yeah they're harmless for one thing but uh, basically if they;re just testing me they want me to come out there and that they're not gonna do any harm to me 
'''F1''': from looking at their operations, what have they done that's really that serious, They've had, I mean they have all this information on you right, they could have done so much worse to you in the past and they still haven't done it, either they're afraid of you or they're trying to just test you, I'm going to go with just test you 
'''Chris''': Uhh yeah but yeah but yall did see the Ed Page, 
Fans either say yes or no 
'''Chris''':That is pretty much the majority of the work there with those documents, and uh information 
'''F4''': I avoid it, 
'''F2''': Yeaahhh you got to forget about it 
'''F4''': I avoid it because ed is ''[Chris is heard over the top here with a loud AHHHHHHH]'' by ed shitheads 
'''F2''': what's done is done, you must move on 
'''Chris''': Yeah, I'm just saying they have done something, they done things with that information, I'm suppose you're right they could of done worse but you know the worse their doing is preventing me from getting a job because that ED page is practically the first thing now days that's looked up when you punch in my name in a google search or any related search, search... uh search sites 
''''Chris'': sigh, well I appreciate yall's input so let me just see if I remember what I've learned, yeah, I should definitely, try to, let my, try to (something) let my mum know that I'm going to pick up julie, that I should tell here that I should be back in like a certain amount of timer or uh days 
'''F1''': It shouldn't take you more than two days, it's true 
'''Chris''': Yeah that's depending, that's depending if I start in the morning, anyway yeah in addition to that I should definitely that I have her, that I have the continual monetary support. But I ah because you know I'm still going to need the money for the gas to and fro. And (something) expense and the wealth of money I could (something) 
'''F1''': Chris what you just need to worry about now is asserting yourself towards your mother, you really gotta put your foot down man 
''[F2 and F1 talk over each other for a bit]'' 
'''F1''': She's gotta respect you on your birthday, it's your special day man 
'''Chris''': Yeah but it's also, but this yeah it's also my Aunt Corina's day because it's her funeral, so I gotta let that pass before it and get my emotions and let her get her emotions outta the way and then i can put my foot down. Hello Cylde 
'''Chris''': Yeah yeah, Hello to clyde 
'''F4''': oh wait clyde's here 
'''F2''': Uh ohhh 
'''Clyde''': Happy Birthday to you, Happy birthday to you, happy birthday Mr. Sonichu, happy birthday to you 
'''F2''': Ohhhhh dear 
'''Chris''': Oh well listen clyde I've just been I've waiting patiently and talking to these nice people here, but anyway I just wanted to hear from you that uh I come pick up julie, I'm not gonna, I just wanted to hear from you that I'm not gonna get harmed or turned into the police or anything like that 
'''Clyde''': Of course not we're just gonna make sure that you never ever ever you know, uhh I've been drinking, anyway, never touch a woman because uh you know, you're not a man 
'''Chris''': uhh yeah but basically I'm allowed to pick up julie over at you headquarters 
'''Clyde''': Sure if you can do that, I dunno if you can drive or anything, driving must be pretty hard for you 
'''Chris''': Yeah well I can, Yeah well as I have told these nice people uh yeah I'm gonna talk to my mother some more and put my foot down and uh you know make my own and hopefully I'll get uh I'll have the money on me for the gas that I need for the trip, and uh you know within the next few days I will come down to Cleveland and pick up julie myself 
'''Clyde''': Well bring your love man, because love's like, love's like a bunch of stuff you know 
'''F5''': Clyde, clyde why are you doing this? Why are you doing this? 
'''Clyde''': Why am I doing this? well uh yeah well uh because chris is a terrible person, he's like lied to me and stuff 
'''F5''': He's not a terrible person, he's my hero 
'''Clyde''': Well you have a terrible hero, pick superman, superman's awesome 
'''Chris''': Yeah well but uh let me see if I can put it more simpler terms, as uh, compared to what all yeall nice people have described for me, Clyde you have you basically just want to test me for being a true person and that's why you're holding julie captive in your headquarters 
'''Clyde''': She's not really captive, she's having the time of her life, we've given ever god damn loving you couldn't provide (evil laughter) 
'''Chris''': well anyway you basically want me to test my love for julie and uh so and uh you just want me to finally show that I'm a man and that I can stand up myself and do what I want like a man should and uh that;s basically it in a nutshell isn't it? 
'''Clyde''': Sure, that's perfect 
'''Chris''': Ok alright well listen I gotta go get something to eat and the I should rest up for the funeral so another time I'll come back into the mumble, but you know shortly after I will, shortly after the funeral I will be coming down to uh Cleveland and I will pick julie up, and I will have her and me spend a little time together, maybe uh maybe over at max's house, and then I'll be bring her back here. My house 
'''Clyde''': Ok if you do make it I'll give you a box of chocolates, a box of chocolates 
'''Chris''': Uh you don't have, you don't have to give me anything, maybe jsut a handshake, a promise that you'll uh disband this organisation and that uh you'll 
'''Clyde''': [''Interrupting'']Sure bro 
'''Chris''': Ok alright, ok we'll i'll talk to my mum later and put my foot down because right now she's sleeping and then I have the funeral to worry about, but after the funeral I will 
'''Clyde''': alright bro, have fun 
'''Chris''': alright yeah ok, well the majority of yall take care and you know just mingle amongst yourselves for now
''[Chris leaves]'' 
[Chat room erupts with everyone speaking over each other]

{{Transcription}}

{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 9.5|Mumble Chat 9.5]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 11|Mumble Chat 11]]|}}

==Links==
[http://www.mediafire.com/?uwwmmnll2ny Download]

{{FanChats}}
[[Category:Mumble chats]]

Talk:Mumble 10

2010-04-26T09:42:50Z

Big Fucking Whoopie:

* Transcribing this shit. I'll probably have something up by this weekend at the latest. --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 09:05, 18 November 2009 (CET)
:*Still at it. Once I have the audio transcribed I'm going to put it up, then go back and try to color code the text with who's saying what, because there are about 4 people speaking in addition to Chris. Added a description and another quote.--[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 11:39, 20 November 2009 (CET)
:*Putting up 16 minutes of transcribed audio. Will give names to the true and loyal fandase, update & correct later... --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 09:32, 21 November 2009 (CET)
*Finished off the transcript. Couldn't make out a few things and it's not the neatest but at least it's finished [[User:Big Fucking Whoopie|Big Fucking Whoopie]] 09:42, 26 April 2010 (UTC)

Mumble 10

2010-04-26T09:38:07Z

Big Fucking Whoopie: Finished Transcript

{{quote|I can tell in my heart that Julie is 19. I'm sure that Max can vouch for her age.|Chris}}

The tenth of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]]. The [[Trolls|loyal fanbase]] try to persuade Chris to travel to Cleveland to rescue Julie from the clutches of her evil brother, Max. Chris (and his mother) have some doubts, mostly that it is a sting operation in the manner of ''To Catch a Predator'' (which had stopped filming by 2009). One of the trolls tries to tell Chris an anecdote about independence and asserting yourself to gain the respect of your parents as you grow up, but Chris interrupts him and talks over his story.

==Summary==
* Trolls talk on an unrelated subject before [[Chris]] arrives.
* Chris says that [[Max]] took Julie to HQ, and asks if he could be hurt or jailed for going to pick her up. Trolls aren't sure.
* None of them have heard of HQ.
* Chris has 5 days to pick Julie up from [[The Miscreants|Miscreant]] HQ in Cleveland, Ohio.
* A troll says that [[Clyde]] is testing Chris's love for [[Julie]], and he should go.
* Chris whines about the 400 mile, seven-hour drive.
* He's 'feeling insecure' about the trip. Even though he's an adult, he should respect his parents' wishes.
* A troll says that no force can keep true love apart.
* It's [[Christian Love Day|Chris's birthday]] tomorrow, he was born at 5:30 in the morning.
* '''Chris says that love is priceless, but he has to do all the work to get to Cleveland.'''
* His [[Barb|mum]] will say not to go, and is worried. He can't convince her to let him go.
* '''Barb is jealous of Chris loving another woman more than her. He has to respect her wishes.'''
* '''His parents pay for his gas. [[Son-Chu]] is Barb's car.'''
* Chris was born at 5:30 EST at Martha Jefferson Hospital, Charlottesville.
* Barb is worried about Chris being set up to be hurt or turned into the police.
* She said the same thing when he was going to visit Blanca - She could be [[pedofork|underaged]] and Chris could be arrested.
* '''Chris can tell in his heart that Julie is 19. Max can vouch for her age. In her scanned ID picture, the year was blurred out.'''
* Trolls compare 'To Catch a Predator' - The person always tells the suspect that they are underage. Chris wouldn't be charged, as they all know Julie is 19.
* Chris leaves.
* Chris returns. Max cackles evilly. Sounds like canned laughter. This makes Chris suspicious about the trip.
* Max is watching [[Family Guy]] Chris gets distracted and starts talking about the episode, saying he loves it.
* [[Aunt Corina]]'s funeral is later; he can't go now.
* Trolls say that this is a birthday test from God and he should go. Chris insists on talking to his mom first.
* Max has intercepted the [[sex tape|video]] that Chris made for Julie. '''The girl who told him this says that Julie is also a troll.'''
* The trolls say that this can't be true. Chris agrees.
* '''He believes in her, Julie is a wonderful sweet 19 year old who wrote him a very nice letter and sent it in the mail with pictures that her friend took.'''
* A troll says that Julie wouldn't be a troll, she's been trolled her whole life by the Georgian government.
* Chris researched Georgia when looking for [[Molvania]]. A troll says that his schoolbooks had a map of [[Molvania]].
* The troll no longer has a map, he had to burn his schoolbooks to heat his house.
* Chris has seen a map of Molvania, but not its surrounding countries.
* Max says he isn't a troll.
* Wait, Chris misread. He is a troll.
* A troll references [[Mumble 9.5]]. Chris says that they got to him emotionally so he can't remember the details.
* The trolls can't do anything about Max. He is a bad boy. One suggests googling [[The Miscreants]].
* A troll makes a joke. Chris laughs, says that it's funny, but says he isn't in the mood to laugh.
* A troll asks Chris if he can tell a story. Chris interrupts: "Sure. Once upon a time..."
* Chris is looking at [[The Miscreants]]' website.
* Chris looks over Miscreant operatives and operations, detailing various acts of trolling against him. He seems to have minimal reaction to this list of various 'friends' and what they were assigned to get from him.
* [[PandaHalo]] being alive yields no response.
* The trolls says that nothing on the site is too bad. The Miscreants are either afraid of or testing Chris.
* Chris says that the [[ED]] page stops him from getting a job.
* Chris thanks the trolls for their input. He'll update his mom and ask for gas money.
* The trolls says that he needs to assert himself against his mother; she should respect him on his birthday.
* Chris says today is [[Aunt Corina]]'s funeral, so he has to wait to get his and his mum's emotions out of the way before he puts his foot down.
* [[Clyde]] enters, sings happy birthday to 'Mister [[Sonichu]]'.
* Chris asks if he's going to be hurt or arrested when he goes to Cleveland.
* Clyde says he only wants to make sure he will never touch a woman; as he's not a man. He welcomes Chris to Miscreant HQ.
* Chris is going to talk to his mom and will come to Cleveland in the next few days.
* Clyde says he's doing this because Chris is a terrible person.
* Julie is not a captive, she's having the time of her life.
* Chris is off to eat and rest for the funeral. Clyde will send chocolates. Chris will talk to his mum after the funeral.

==Transcript==

{{quote|Yeah, but then my Mom is pretty much jealous of me loving another woman more than her.|Chris, describing his Oedipus complex}}

'''Fan 1''': From what I read there's a way to take ownership of the files that are unaccounted for. 
'''Chris''': Hey everybody, I have- I have a question. 
'''Fan 2''': From my understanding Max took Julie over to what is called "HQ". 
'''Fan 3''': Headquarters? 
'''Chris''': And uh, yeah. And uh, Clyde is setting things up over there. So is uh, just wanna know is Clyde planning on, like, to hurt me or get me into jail or anything like that if I go over to Cleveland to pick up Julie myself over at the HQ? 
'''Fan''': I dunno. 
'''High-pitched Fan''': I'm not sure, I'm just doing homework. 
'''Fan''': Uh hey, let me fix something here. Hold on a minute. 
'''Chris''': Alright, so nobody here knows, knows uh, has anybody here actually been to this HQ? This headquarters? 
'''Fan''': I dunno I just got here 15 minutes ago. 
'''Fan''': I don't know what that is. 
'''High-pitched Fan''': I just got here, too. I'm doing homework right now. 
'''Chris''': ''[sigh]'' Ahhhh...yeah, uh, Max, Julie's brother, uh, pretty much spirited away Julie, took her to the HQ, to the Headquarters, where The Miscreants, I think they were called are, and now, uh, Max wants me to come over to Cleveland within the next five days to pick up Julie from the Headquarters. And I'm just trying to find out, uh, if Clyde is planning, if he's going to put me, going to try to force me in jail or hurt me or anything like that. 
'''Fan''': Hmmm. 
'''Fan''': Hmmm. 
'''High-pitched Fan''': That would be unfortunate. 
'''1Fan''': I highly doubt it. 
'''Chris''': Highly doubt it. 
'''1Fan''': From what it seems Clyde is just trying to scare you. 
'''Chris''': I see. 
'''Fan''': Yeah, I think he's lying. 
'''1Fan''': I think that if you actually go up there it would show him that you are very serious about, you know, your feelings towards Julie, I had a whole big list of things I was about to say now and they just went boom. So to just to the chase here I'd just say go for it. And I'm pretty sure, if anything, Clyde would actually shake your hand and say, "Congratulations, you've finally done it." 
'''Fan''': Yeah, you should go and show him that you truly care about your sweetheart. 
'''Chris''': ''[sigh]'' Ok. ''[long pause]'' Yeah, you see, one thing is, uh, I mean I-I understand is that it's like a 400 mile 7 hour drive, according to MapQuest, between my address and... Max's address? But, yeah well Julie is living with Max, her older brother. Yeah, but anyway I was, anyway I was, still feeling like insecure about the trip, especially since like uh, you know even though I am an adult, I should respect my mother's and my father's wishes. And uh, still a little bit on the, you know, still gonna need a few dollars to get me to uh, Cleveland. 
'''1Fan''': Chris, I'm gonna say this. 
'''Chris''': Yes. I'm listening. 
'''1Fan''': If you truly love someone. Truly in your heart love someone, no force in the world, be it distance, be it a physical obstacle, anything, can stop you from being with that person. And protecting that person that you care about that much. This is one of life's little tests, Chris. And you need to take it head on. 
'''Fan''': Yeah. And I guess in less than 20 minutes you'll be 27. 
'''1Fan''': Happy birthday, by the way. 
'''Chris''': Actually, actually, thank you, actually, I was born at 5:30 in the morning. [long pause] Actually I understand love is priceless. But you gotta understand that there are limits on uh, on the distance. I mean love is priceless, but you know, I have to do all the work to get there. 
'''Fan''': Chris? Chris, what kind of mileage does your car get? 
'''Chris''': 35 highway. 25 city. 
'''High-pitched fan''': That's pretty good! 
'''Fan''': I wouldn't worry about it. And if you do get caught in some kind of trouble there are nice people out there that can help you. You have a cell phone, right? 
'''Chris''': Um, ok. Yeah. 
'''Fan''': There you go! You have no problem, man. 
'''Chris''': Yeah listen, that's another thing, that my mom, y'know my mom is like you know, she's gonna be telling me, don't go, don't go, I worry about you, and she [[Obesity|watches a lot of television]] and it's like I'm trying, I've been trying, to get her to let me go to Julie in Cleveland... 
'''Fan''': Chris, I think you have to show your mom that you truly love Julie. 
'''Chris''': Yeah, but then my mom is also a bit jealous of me loving another woman... more than her. I mean I know, I mean I understand she's in a situation like, "cut the umbilical cord" you would say, I'm sure. But still, I have to respect my mother, very much. 
'''1Fan''': Well, Chris, you pay them for your room and board, right? 
'''Chris''': Yeah. 
'''1Fan''': Is there anything they do to support you that you don't pay for? Other than just, their moral support. 
'''Chris''': They uh, they give me food, and they uh, they also pay for my gas as well. And plus the car I drive is actually my mother's car. 
'''Fan''': Oh... 
'''1Fan''': Sorry, I gotta use voice activity because I'm tired of pressing my button here. And I'm gonna go on a rant here. Chris, I'm going to tell you a little story. Um, I've had the same problem back when I was younger, back when I was 18... 
'''Chris''': ''[Interrupts]'' Alright but uh, alright... 
'''1Fan''': When I turned 18. Let me tell you this, because it's very relevant to the situation. 
'''Chris''': Let me just say, uh, a thing though. It's like, I don't want to leave home without saying goodbye, though. That's not the kind of person I am. It's that I want to give my mom at least a notice-amount of time that, like, y'know, I'm going over to Cleveland, and I wanna uh, make sure I have uh, her consent, like you know, she's saying "it's alright, have a safe trip, come back soon." It's not like uh, I mean at this point she doesn't want me to go. But I'm just sayin'. Hey, unmute the rascal, please. 
'''1Fan''': ''[Laughs once]'' 
'''Muffled Fan''': It was just echo. 
'''Chris''': Oh uh, I'm sorry. Anyway I'm done, you understood me there, rascal, right? 
'''Troll''': It's 5:30 in the morning where, exactly? 
'''Chris''': 5:30 Eastern Standard Time I was born in [[Honest Content|Martha Jefferson Hospital]] in [[Charlottesville]]. 
'''Fan''': Thank you! 
'''Other fan''': That's what I needed. 
'''1Fan''': Ok. [pauses] 
'''Muffled Fan''': ''[Says something like "it won't cost that much money, it's not that big a trip, I've taken"]'' 
'''Chris''': Yeah, but also, you know she does worry about me and I could be set up to be hurt, or turned into the police and arrested when I get there. 
'''Fan''': What would you have to do to be taken by the police? 
'''Chris''': Yeah, but also, uh, same thing happened before when I was about to go to [[Blanca]]. My mom didn't want me to go because it could have been a setup, like she would have been setting me up, like she would have been [[Pedofork|underaged]], and then right there I'd be turned into the police. 
'''Fan''': That's entrapment, Chris. 
'''Chris''': Yeah, but y'know, I can tell in my heart that Julie is 19. I mean, I'm sure that Max can vouch for her age. Because you know, even though she did send me her ID, her scanned ID as an image, her birthdate is blurred out. So it's hard to tell the year. 
'''Fan''': Besides Chris, have you ever seen ''[[Wikipedia:To Catch a Predator|To Catch a Predator]]?'' Whenever they do their sting operations, they always have their fake underage boy or girl, whatever, always tells the person multiple times that they are not of legal age, it's like "Oh yeah, you know I'm 13 right?" And the person doesn't care. Which is why they get caught with child pornography or whatever charges they get caught on. 
'''Chris''': Alright, well, she repeatedly told me, she repeatedly informed me she was 19. 
'''Fan''': So if it was in fact a sting operation of some kind, you would be charged with nothing. Because you were not told she was underage. Besides, all of us already know she actually is 19. 
'''Fan''': Mmm hm. 
'''Chris''': Alright. Yeah. Yeah. Wait a moment, I'll be right back, okay? I'll be right back. 
'''High-pitched troll''': Anyone know how to do quadratic equations? 
'''Fan''': I haven't done those since I was in high school. I don't remember. 
'''Chris''': ''[Sound of Chris clumsily sitting back down at his computer and letting out a small sigh]'' I just went downstairs to see if I could bring my mom up here so she could talk to y'all but she's asleep right now. 
'''Max''': ''[Diabolical laughter]'' 
'''Fan''': What the? 
'''Chris''': Wait a minute, just a moment ago did I just hear Max, who quotes himself as being named Julie's brother, did he just give an evil laugh? 
'''Fan''': I think so. 
'''Fan''': Looks like it. 
'''Chris''': Yeah, so that just brings up some suspicion right there. I mean I'm just doing... you did not have to mute him to hear what he had to say! Oh, he just told me on Skype he's watching [[Family Guy]]. 
'''Fan''': Which episode? 
'''Chris''': He says "Mine... thing is on voice activated" Oh, it's the one... oh, I love that episode! It's the one where Meg sings. Becomes a pop star. Gets a makeover. 
'''High-pitched troll''': Oh, I remember that one! 
'''Chris''': Yeah, I have that episode downloaded on my [[PS3|Playstation 3]]. 
'''Fan''': Chris, now is probably the best time if you're gonna actually go and do this, to do it. I know your mom's asleep, but... 
'''Chris''': I cannot do it now, I have to go to my aunt Corina's funeral this afternoon. 
'''1Fan''': True. It's just kind of part of life. In a sense. 
'''Fan''': God is testing you on your 27th birthday, Chris. 
'''Chris''': ''[sigh]'' He's tested me before on the same situation as well. But yeah I guess I should talk to my mom better about that. You know tell her that I'll let her know that I have been assured numerously that it's not a setup. I mean even Max will back me up on that. 
'''1Fan''': Chris, what if she says no? 
'''Chris''': Really. Hmm. Really. Hmm. So what you're saying here is all the times I've received calls from trolls, telling me to F-off, or I'm a S-head, they've just been basically wanting me to prove myself and not out to hurt me or anything. 
'''Fan''': Did you receive any calls today or something? 
'''Chris''': Yeah. It's just that I received a call earlier, and that's where I learned Max found [[Sex tape|the video I sent to Julie of her own consent]], she asked me to send her a video, and then you see, he said it got uploaded to YouTube, so I assume that uh, I mean at first I was shocked but then realized that since her brother, uh, Max was a troll at himself at one point or another that he probably found it and uploaded it. 
'''Fan''': Um, Chris. 
'''Chris''': And also, on that note, the girl who called me to tell me about that, uh, accused Julie of being a troll herself on that note. 
'''Fan''': Was she? She can't be a troll. 
'''Chris''': Yeah, I know. I believed- I mean, I believe in Julie and I still believe in her that she is not a troll, and that she is a wonderful, sweet caring 19-year-old, who wrote me, who hand-wrote me a very nice letter, and sent it to me in the mail, and sent me her printed pictures that her friend took of her. 
'''Fan''': Yeah. Yeah. She wouldn't be interested in trolling. She's been trolled all her life by the Georgian government. Based on what she told me. 
'''Chris''': I'm sorry could you repeat that? 
'''Fan''': She doesn't have time to be a troll, she's been trolled all her life by the Georgian government. 
'''Chris''': The Georg- OH, the country of Georgia. Yeah, I did research on that when I was trying to find Molvania on a map. 
'''Screwhead''': It's weird, my books, my old books have Molvania on the maps. 
'''Fan''': You couldn't find it? 
'''Chris''': So wait a minute Screwhead, you're saying that you have a book, that has Molvania? 
'''Fan''': That's funny, I was told it was unrecognized. 
'''Screwhead''': I have old books, but maybe the Mexican government is to recognize a country. You know, different from the American government. 
'''Chris''': Say, Screwhead, can you uh, can you uh, darn the echo, but anyway, could you find on the internet, a map of Molvania and its neighboring countries? I mean because I can tell right now that it's been neighboring Georgia. From what I understand, from what Julie told me, and her other friend told me as well. 
'''Screwhead''': Chris, you know that Mexico's not a very developed country. It didn't have internet until a couple years ago. So I'm pretty sure that... 
'''Chris''': ''[Loudly interrupts]'' Yeah, I understand that, I understand, I also understand that Molvania's 50 miles radius. 
'''Fan''': So I don't think I can find it. The old books are long gone. We had to burn them because we had to heat our house with fire, and we had to burn them. 
'''Chris''': [[Chris and remorse|Oh, that's sad,]] but I'm talkin' 'bout, you know, I'm asking if you know where I can find a map like you had in your books on the internet. 
'''1Fan''': You would just have to look around, I would assume. 
'''Chris''': You know what, I did internet searches, but it's like I find a map of Molvania, the country, but I'm not finding a map of Molvania and its ''neighboring'' countries. 
'''Fan''': I'm so sorry Chris but I don't think I can find it, I don't think there's a scan or something of the book, it's like, a schoolbook or something and they change every year, it's, I don't think so, sorry. 
'''Chris''': I see. Um, but listen, Max is telling me that he is not a troll and he uh, ask y'all what they think, because he said that y'all don't seem to care. 
'''Fan''': Mmm. I dunno. 
'''Chris''': Oh, oh. He said tell them that he ''is'' a troll. I misread it. 
'''Fan''': Uh... 
'''Fan''': Chris, you said that some trolls came in here earlier. What did they tell you? 
'''Chris''': Clyde was a [client?] among that group. Whole buncha stuff. They got to me emotionally. So it's hard for me to remember the details. 
'''Fan''': Oh. I see. I'm sorry, Chris. You should enforce security on this channel. 
'''1Fan''': Did you get any calls from the trolls today? 
'''Chris''': Yeah but ayway. Just answer Max's question, he sent, you know, he is a troll, and what you think, because y'all don't seem to care what he's saying here. 
'''1Fan''': What's he gonna do? 
'''Fan''': We can't do anything. 
'''High-pitched Troll''': He's a bad boy. 
'''Fan''': He's a bad boy, but I don't think you can do anything about that. 
'''Chris''': I told them what you did, Max. About spirting away Julie. To headquarters. To your headquarters. 
'''1Fan''': Chris, like I said earlier this is them testing you. We really can't do much but give you our support. 
'''Fan''': Mmm hm. 
'''1Fan''': We can sit there and shout at the trolls all we want, but, in the end, this is up to you, man. ''You'' have to go out and do something. ''You've'' got to get her back. 
'''Fan''': This is the start of a new life for you. In about six hours. 
'''Chris''': Oh, he said you'd prefer if I can call it ''Miscreant'' Headquarters. ''[Chris gets confused]'' Oh, actually he says ''he'd'' prefer it if I called it Miscreant Headquarters. 
'''1Fan''': ''[Mock contempt]'' I don't care what they are. 
'''Fan''': You could Google it. It's like an organization, right? Maybe they have a web page or something 
'''Chris''': ''[General sighing noises]'' 
'''Fan''': Rascal is not interested. 
'''1Fan''': Rascal is more interested in things like soda. 
''[Laughter from the Trolls and Chris]'' 
'''Chris''': That's a little funny. I'm just not in the mood to laugh right now. 
'''1Fan''': Well, I mean, we don't blame you. It's kinda a serious situation you're in right now. 
'''Fan''': I think I found the website. Hold on a second. 
'''Chris''': Uh, don't worry about looking it. He told me to Google it, so I'm loading my web browser now. 
'''Fan''': It's ''[unintelligible]'' only. I don't know if you can find it, really. 
'''1Fan''': Chris, can I tell you a story? 
'''Chris''': Alright, once upon a time... 
'''1Fan''': Its not really a 'Once upon a time' kinda story. I meant to tell you this earlier, but I mean I got kinda cut off. 
'''Chris''': I understand, so, uh, what's the story?. 
'''1Fan''': I was in a similar situation as you. Um, not as serious as this but still in the whole case of um, y'know, having conflicting interests between parents and my own personal interests. Um, basically what it ended up with was, I left my house. Um, I had just turned eighteen and I didn't feel that a rule that was set by my parents was too logical, in a sense. Its like you can't enforce home rule- like, parental rules on a child if he's not a child anymore. So I was told "don't come home." So I didn't. I stayed out of the house for almost a week. I survived off of twenty dollars, and stayed at a friend's house. Kept going to school and everything. Um, and one day my mom called me crying, apologizing for putting me through that. And since then she's had nothing but respect for me. Because she knows that if she were to do that again I could easily survive. And now you're in the same situation right now. Your mom is holding you back, she's holding you from getting what you want, getting what you need. And you really need to... you really need to break that. You need to cut that cord. And its gonna hurt at first, yeah. It's gonna hurt both of you. But once it's over with... 
'''Chris''': ''[sighs heavily]'' 
'''1Fan''': ...things will be much better, and you will both be so much happier, and you will have Julie. 
'''Chris''': I see. Yeah. Alright. Yeah I just put up, I just co-I just put up a link to the route myself, it's the miscreant page I just found. 
''[pause]'' 
'''Chris''': ''[sighs]'' 
'''Fan''': Found something? ''[pause]'' Oh...oh.
'''Chris''': Oh 
'''F1''': Their leader is a cat 
'''F2''': hahaha 
'''Chris''': A cat? 
'''F2''': Yeah 
'''F1''': I (something) these guys seriously because their leader is a cat 
'''F2''': Yeah, their leader is a kitty. A fluffy kitty with a person (something) 
'''Chris''': [''sigh''] Well this... You Know that's funny because uh... Yes I'm not seeing the cat on the uh what I'm having, but I'm reading both the link I copy and pasted from the skype window and the link the he posted, that max himself typed in and it's the same thing. and uh I'm not seeing the cat 
'''Chris''': Oh 
'''F2''': Yeah, that's what we're looking at 
'''Chris''': Oh, yeah I see that 
'''F3''': Looks like they're pretty organised, you know this troll 
'''F1''': Look at their code names 
'''Chris''': Yeah, I'm checking out their operations , let's see. Um. [begins to read from the site]Alright operations E, say. Operative Evan. Status alive and enjoying life. Go test the waters of the one known as chris chan notable accomplishments. Yeah uhh 
'''Chris''': Masturbating and Squirting 
'''F2''': Hmmm 
'''Chris''': Then operation jay, that's jason. Alive and having sex, Compile information on the one known as Chris Chan. hacking the emails. Then operation B. Blanca. Alive and smoking. test the vulnerability of the one known as chirs chan. Destroy the medallion. Operation P, Panda. Alive and at my side, discovered a sexual nature. Gained a free PSP. I sent her that from my own heart. It was a pink PSP that I had originally gotten it for Megan but then she dumped me and I just held on to it for a while and I uh sent it to her so... shoot 
'''F3''': Chris, are this true, did this really happen to you? 
'''Chris''': uh what? 
'''F3''': The things that they say they've done here, they're pretty awful you know 
'''Chris''': Uh yeah, Uh yeah some, yea most of which yeah, and then opera- operative L, uhh name lord, public name, uhh, name, say that, uhh name the lord and in practice he says the female, and then the public name the man in the pickle suit, status unknown know operatives, get-obtain sensitive documents of the one known as chris chan, and a notable accomplishment, getting nude pictures and a dvd. Known as operative L. I mean how can I see these at uhh on the website here that I'm looking at. The uh miscreants page that I uh, that the link is on, on the side here yeah I'm looking at that website. I just read you the four operations and the operative that they had 
'''F2''': hmmm (something) 
'''F2''': the cat with a person (something) in it 
'''F3''': It's a cute cat 
'''High Pitch Fan''': It's adorable 
'''Chris''': It's a cat, that's all I was going to say 
'''Chris''': Uh it's probably from a movie or something, or it could be a youtube video, or any generic gif 
'''Chris''': [''Typing''] hmm so anyway those of yall who just saw this web pa- uh this website, d'yall still feel that they're (burp) scuse me, d'yall still feel that uh 
'''F1''': [''Interrupting'']That they're harmless? 
'''Chris''': d'yall still feel, well yeah they're harmless for one thing but uh, basically if they;re just testing me they want me to come out there and that they're not gonna do any harm to me 
'''F1''': from looking at their operations, what have they done that's really that serious, They've had, I mean they have all this information on you right, they could have done so much worse to you in the past and they still haven't done it, either they're afraid of you or they're trying to just test you, I'm going to go with just test you 
'''Chris''': Uhh yeah but yeah but yall did see the Ed Page, 
Fans either say yes or no 
'''Chris''':That is pretty much the majority of the work there with those documents, and uh information 
'''F4''': I avoid it, 
'''F2''': Yeaahhh you got to forget about it 
'''F4''': I avoid it because ed is ''[Chris is heard over the top here with a loud AHHHHHHH]'' by ed shitheads 
'''F2''': what's done is done, you must move on 
'''Chris''': Yeah, I'm just saying they have done something, they done things with that information, I'm suppose you're right they could of done worse but you know the worse their doing is preventing me from getting a job because that ED page is practically the first thing now days that's looked up when you punch in my name in a google search or any related search, search... uh search sites 
''''Chris'': sigh, well I appreciate yall's input so let me just see if I remember what I've learned, yeah, I should definitely, try to, let my, try to (something) let my mum know that I'm going to pick up julie, that I should tell here that I should be back in like a certain amount of timer or uh days 
'''F1''': It shouldn't take you more than two days, it's true 
'''Chris''': Yeah that's depending, that's depending if I start in the morning, anyway yeah in addition to that I should definitely that I have her, that I have the continual monetary support. But I ah because you know I'm still going to need the money for the gas to and fro. And (something) expense and the wealth of money I could (something) 
'''F1''': Chris what you just need to worry about now is asserting yourself towards your mother, you really gotta put your foot down man 
''[F2 and F1 talk over each other for a bit]'' 
'''F1''': She's gotta respect you on your birthday, it's your special day man 
'''Chris''': Yeah but it's also, but this yeah it's also my (something) day because it's her funeral, so I gotta let that pass before it and get my emotions and let her get her emotions outta the way and then i can put my foot down. Hello Cylde 
'''Chris''': Yeah yeah, Hello to clyde 
'''F4''': oh wait clyde's here 
'''F2''': Uh ohhh 
'''Clyde''': Happy Birthday to you, Happy birthday to you, happy birthday Mr. Sonichu, happy birthday to you 
'''F2''': Ohhhhh dear 
'''Chris''': Oh well listen clyde I've just been I've waiting patiently and talking to these nice people here, but anyway I just wanted to hear from you that uh I come pick up julie, I'm not gonna, I just wanted to hear from you that I'm not gonna get harmed or turned into the police or anything like that 
'''Clyde''': Of course not we're just gonna make sure that you never ever ever you know, uhh I've been drinking, anyway, never touch a woman because uh you know, you're not a man 
'''Chris''': uhh yeah but basically I'm allowed to pick up julie over at you headquarters 
'''Clyde''': Sure if you can do that, I dunno if you can drive or anything, driving must be pretty hard for you 
'''Chris''': Yeah well I can, Yeah well as I have told these nice people uh yeah I'm gonna talk to my mother some more and put my foot down and uh you know make my own and hopefully I'll get uh I'll have the money on me for the gas that I need for the trip, and uh you know within the next few days I will come down to Cleveland and pick up julie myself 
'''Clyde''': Well bring your love man, because love's like, love's like a bunch of stuff you know 
'''F5''': Clyde, clyde why are you doing this? Why are you doing this? 
'''Clyde''': Why am I doing this? well uh yeah well uh because chris is a terrible person, he's like lied to me and stuff 
'''F5''': He's not a terrible person, he's my hero 
'''Clyde''': Well you have a terrible hero, pick superman, superman's awesome 
'''Chris''': Yeah well but uh let me see if I can put it more simpler terms, as uh, compared to what all yeall nice people have described for me, Clyde you have you basically just want to test me for being a true person and that's why you're holding julie captive in your headquarters 
'''Clyde''': She's not really captive, she's having the time of her life, we've given ever god damn loving you couldn't provide (evil laughter) 
'''Chris''': well anyway you basically want me to test my love for julie and uh so and uh you just want me to finally show that I'm a man and that I can stand up myself and do what I want like a man should and uh that;s basically it in a nutshell isn't it? 
'''Clyde''': Sure, that's perfect 
'''Chris''': Ok alright well listen I gotta go get something to eat and the I should rest up for the funeral so another time I'll come back into the mumble, but you know shortly after I will, shortly after the funeral I will be coming down to uh Cleveland and I will pick julie up, and I will have her and me spend a little time together, maybe uh maybe over at max's house, and then I'll be bring her back here. My house 
'''Clyde''': Ok if you do make it I'll give you a box of chocolates, a box of chocolates 
'''Chris''': Uh you don't have, you don't have to give me anything, maybe jsut a handshake, a promise that you'll uh disband this organisation and that uh you'll 
'''Clyde''': [''Interrupting'']Sure bro 
'''Chris''': Ok alright, ok we'll i'll talk to my mum later and put my foot down because right now she's sleeping and then I have the funeral to worry about, but after the funeral I will 
'''Clyde''': alright bro, have fun 
'''Chris''': alright yeah ok, well the majority of yall take care and you know just mingle amongst yourselves for now
''[Chris leaves]'' 
[Chat room erupts with everyone speaking over each other]

{{Transcription}}

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