CWCki - User contributions [en]

SonichuBabies

2010-10-27T20:52:31Z

Boop:

'''SonichuBabies''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 25 [[October 2010]]. In it, Chris rips off the [[1980s]] cartoon ''Muppet Babies'' by recasting the [[Chaotic Combo]] as [[Sonee and Rosey|babies]]. Much like [[Things Chris has ripped off|everything else he steals]], Chris's version of the series lacks any of the charm and wit the original cartoon had, transforming it into "Chaotic Combo as babies, doing stuff babies aren't ''supposed'' to be doing!"

Chris shows us his lack of understanding about what constitutes proper childcare by leaving the little creatures unattended. Showing that they aren't mature enough to be left alone for extended periods, the children [[Chris and sex|kiss]], watch TV shows meant for older audiences, ostracize Blake, and [[CWC Fighter|fight]] - Punchy even goes so far as to knock Wild out of a window, which could give Wild serious injuries.

This marks the first time Chris has actually done ''anything'' with his beloved Sonichu Characters since the [[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas|Christmas Special.]] Much to the [[Trolls|fans']] chagrin, Chris has decided to take all of his characters and turn them all into [[Sonee & Rosey|the most annoying part]] of the CWCVerse.

It should be noted that this is the first time a Sonee of Blake has appeared, casting him as [[wikipedia:Gonzo the Great|Gonzo]], despite the fact that there's nothing to compare the two together, much less the rest of the characters. Also note that Chris [[autism|has to describe Blake's personality in detail]].

Also worth mentioning is that ''Sonichu Babies'' was the name of one of the stories in [[Sonichu 3]], though it was an origin story for the Combo. Since the Chaotic Combo never met in the comics until they evolved, and since it is established in the comics that Sonichu, Rosechu and Blake were never sonees or rosees at any point (Sonichu and Rosechu were transformed by the Chaotic Rainbow and Blake was cloned) it's possible that this is not canon in the CWCVerse, or a complete retcon.

As a further testament to Chris's utter lack of imagination, the vignette featuring Young Rosechu and Young Sonichu features the same elements from his [[PlayingHouse|other short]] that was released the same day: The wife works as a journalist, while the husband stays at home and is supposed to take care of a crying and shitting baby but delegates the task to the older sibling.

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = SonichuBabies
| video = {{#ev:youtube|J3IuXNk5_LU}}
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other|text}} {{Sex|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}
| shirt = Unclear
| previous = [[A Workout]]
| next = [[PlayingHouse]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:Wittle Cute Sonees Page 1 by johaely.jpg|thumb|Sonichu babies!]]

''[Displays four crude drawings of members of the [[Chaotic Combo]] as babies, stuck to the end of what appear to be pens or straws]'' Dooweeoooh, [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]] babies, we make our dreams come truueee...

''[Wild Sonichu and Blake in shot]'' Sonichu babies, we'll do anything for youuu...

''<nowiki>[</nowiki>[[Sonichu (character)|Sonee]] and [[Rosechu|Rosee]] in shot]'' When your world was kinda weird and you wished that you were theeere... ''[As Rosee]'' Just close your eyes and make-believe, and you can be anywhere!

''[Drawing of a pair of human legs in shot]'' Is everything alright in here? ''[As all [[sonichus]]]'' Yes Nanny!

''[Displays all drawings, dropping some]'' Sonichu Sonichu Sonichu Sonichu babies! Yaaay! Okay, let's beginning da show!

''[Sonee and Rosey]'' We're having fun today in d-in d-in da ''room'', aren't we! Y-Aren't we Rosey! Hehedat's right Sonee, we're having fun in here! Dat's [[Wild]], [[Bubbles]] ''[Blake appears instead of Bubbles]'', [[Punchy]] ''[Angelica appears instead of Punchy]'', [[Magi-chan]], [[Angelica]], even [[Blake]]! ''[Shows other drawings, speaks as Blake]'' Hello. What? I'm [[Christian Weston Chandler|the weird one]]. Compare me to Gonzo. I have [[niggos|black]] hair though. ''[Fumbles with sticks for a few seconds, removes all but Sonee and Rosey]'' Anyway, come with us, we'regoingtohavefun, whee! ''[Moves the two around without rhyme or reason]'' Whee, oh we're having fun, wheeeewheeee! Mm. Ey Ro- ey Rosey we're jus' a... d-d-fun. What'd you wanna do now? I wanna do that thing like we saw on da [[TV]] show. That what ya wanna do? Yeaah! Alright! ''[Makes the baby siblings "kiss"]'' Mmmmmmm! Mmmmm!

''<nowiki>[</nowiki>[[Chris and writing|Exposition!Magi-chan]] moves into shot]'' What? Ever since they watched- they seen that kissing scene, on that episode of... The Young and the Restless... they been makin' out, all the time! They lot-ov-enjoying it. Lil' Sonee has been noted saying, "she tastes like applesauce"!

''[Disembodied legs return]'' Hey kids, I got' go out now. And mukku-my husband's comin' with me. ''[Comic Chris' trademark sneakers join]'' That's right. We're going out to go- we're going out shopping. We're gonna bring back some delicious groceries, and we'll be back in a lil' while. ''[Pause]'' Wait a minute. Who's gonna mind the babies? ''Oh yeah you're right. You stay home.'' Oh yeah you're right, I'll stay home, you go out to get the groceries. ''Look how we settled that!'' Well, we s- we're always able to settle things. Even und- even our minor disagreements. Look the way we still love each other. Mmm. ''[Pieces of paper "kiss"]'' Okay, see you later. ''[Female legs leave]''

Alright children, y'all s- y'all be carefull out here. I'm gonna keep the door op- I'm gonna keep the door open, you just uh, give me a shout if you uh, need anything. ''[Hastily grabs bunch of children in view]'' ''Okay Papa C!''

''[Bubbles and Wild, Rosey accidentally sneaks into frame]'' What's the matter, Wild? Iunno. Suddenly I just don't feel well. Well, and why is that? I- I was watchin' my- I was watchin' Blues Clues the other day, and, I missed a clue! You missed a clue? How'd you do that? You're- that guy was supposed to be able to detect da clues before that guy in the green shirt does! Yeah, what was that guy's name? Uhh... heck if I know! Mm. Well, anyway... I feel, a bit, I feel bad because I missed a clue! Dun worry about it, we all make mistakes. Yeah, you're right. We all do make mistakes. I guess I'll get over this someho- s-sometime. Yeah, you will. Hey, let's go play in the t- let's go play on the merry-go-round. Okay! ''[Both move out of frame]'' Whee whee whee whee whee we'll go play onna merry-go round!

''[Pause, fumbling noises offscreen. Punchy enters.]'' [[wikipedia:Samurai Pizza Cats|Samurai Pizza Cats]]! Miaow miaow miaow miaow miaow! Samurai Pizza Cats! Miaowmiaowmiow miaow miaow! Samurai armor! Oh! A [[CWCville|communist]], huh? You freakin' no good-- [interrupted by off-screen female voice] Would anyone happen to have a nail file on them? ...C'mon sweetie, we're all doin' a TV show! Hey wait a sec I thought [unintelligible] on time because I watchin' live television!

''[Replaced by Blake]'' Hyeah. Mm. I really like Bubbles. She's so pretty, she's so bub-b-ly, she's so fun. I'm just- b- I'm just the weirdo here. I'm the one that gets... left out. It's not because I'm- it's not because of my colour, it's just because I have my own opinions beside from theirs. I do things for myself. Sultimes I like to r- sometimes I like to read, even though I don't know how to read yet! I'm different. I think for myself and things. I play too sometimes. Ba-suh-I bring danger along some-I bring danger with me sometimes, and... that makes me sad. You know. They can't apprec-me- appreciate me even though I'm young and danger... [gibberish] ''[Enter Sonee and Rosee]'' ''Wubuh listen de- listen to Blake over der? Keep on going on and on with his own self! [unintelligible] again...'' Yeah, well he's talkin' to himself, huh. Well I dunno. Seems kinda weird. ''[As Blake]'' Oh will you shut up! We all talk to ourselves at one time or another! ''Sorry Blake!'' Yeah, sorry dude! Aah, whatever. ''[Blake saunters off]'' Hmm.

''[Angelica]'' All the lovely things we r- I read in the Bible. Lalalalalalalaa. Lovely things, inna Bible. Good story. ''[Magi-chan]'' Mmm, what stories are you reading about there, Angelica? ''Oh, this one, I'm reading about [[Genesis]]. The story of Adam and Eve!'' Ah yes. And then the apple gets bitten. ''YOU SPOILED IT FOR ME!! [Pause] I suppose next you're gonna tell me who gets thrown out first.'' I won't, I'll just uh, give you respect, there. ''Thank you. [Pause] Oh no, Eve gets kicked out first? [Whine] Well, at least we women grew to power eventually.'' Yeah. ''[Awkward pause]'' ''Praaaise Jesus in all his lov- in all his... forgiveness for us, he died for our sins and everything.'' Yes, we are Christians. We go to church every Sunday. ''An' Nanny takes us!'' Yeah. And Chris comes with us too! [[Chris and religion|He's a good Christian, yes he is.]] ''So what you wanna do now?'' Let's go play with Legos! ''Okay! Wheeee! We're off to play with Legos!''

''[Long pause. Punchy and Bubbles come into view, before being hastily retracted. Chris mumbles to himself before replacing Bubbles with Wild Sonichu]'' Hey Wild, you wanna spar a li'l? Okay Punchy! ''[Punchy launches himself at Wild, falls over]'' Huh. Got me there. ''[Wild "hits" Punchy]'' Got me again. Well, I'm gonna get you now. PEWWWW! ''[Punchy flies into Wild, both go offscreen. Punchy returns alone]'' Oh, shoot. I [[Mypoe|knocked him out da window!]] Yo c'mon[?], come in back in da window! ''I'm really hurt! You had me lyin' in a bush!'' I'm sorry. ''[Awkward silence]'' Aah, it's okay. Just be careful to watch yer punches. Cuz I gotta pull my punches if I wanna work[?] inside the nursery. ''Yeah.'' So, I'll do that. ''[Punchy comes forward]'' Because, [[Death threats|violence is not always the answer]] to e- is not always the answer. So- ye- uh, self defense, it ''can'' be... the answer. ''[Wild moves in front of Punchy]'' ''I agree. I don't like being bullied. Me, I was- b- m- I was out there riding my... bicycle the other day, an' [[Clyde Cash|bully]] comes up to me, and he, he g-steals the bicycle and he [[Kick the Autistic|beats me up]]! What's wrong with that dude?'' D'ya want me to go beat him up? ''Nah, I just need to learn self defense.'' I'm gonna go find and [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|beat him up]]. Hiyaaa! ''[Both launch out of frame, but Wild returns] Ya don't even know what he looks like, where ya goin' Punchy? ...Anyway. [Turns around once, leaves]''

''[Punchy re-enters]'' Th-you can't beat me Punchy[?], I'm [[Random-access humor|comical]], knock knock, who's there, orange, orange who, orange you glad I didn't say banana? ''[Pause]'' What? ''[Pause]'' Oh well. Knock knock. Who's there. Uhh, hello? What d'you mean, "hello". Well you said "who's there". Dyeah knock knock joke? I say "knock knock", you say "who's there". What? I stayed up watching [[Officer Keino|Home Movies]] one night. Place- It's a funny cartoon show with Brendon Small[?]. [[Sonichu 8|Not recommended for children]], though. It- still maybe teenagers. Or youth- or you- think it's a PG rating. TV-PG. ''[Jiggles around]'' I don't care I watched it by myself! I was up, I was wirey! I couldn't go to sleep! ''[Is still for a second, before leaving somewhat abruptly.]''

''[Sonee and Rosee return]'' ''Okay so... What should we do now?'' I think let's go play House! ''Yeah let's go play House again!'' Yay! Doodoodoodooboodoodoo, hi honey I'm home. ''Oh, where've you been? Mmm, I mean, how was your day sweetheart?'' It's been good, y'know, I've just been, uh, doing business and everything. M-keepin' everything- keepin' the city safe with my swift speed and lightning attacks! ''Very good. I've been minding the children. Although when I went out, I wa- I was intercepted by one of the villains! But I- gre- myself at self defence, [[The Incredible Lioness|I struck them right back!]] And I stood my ground.'' ''[Pause]'' That's very good. How're the children. ''I think I just told you that. [She didn't.]'' Oh yes you did! The children are good! Hey- okay- so- that was good, let's do role reversal. ''Okay!''

''[Switch places]'' ''Hi honey, I'm home!'' Oh hi honey, how was w- how was- how was your work at [[Jackie|journalism]]? ''Oh, very good, I wrote- guh story here, and there. [Pause] The bank was robbed.'' There was a v- there was a bank robbery? ''Yeah, didn't you hear that? There was a horse and mane[????]!'' Horse and mane? ''Sure, the horse was on the main!'' ''[Pause]'' What? Iunno. Go figure. Comedy. Anyway, [unintelligible], and I made, bulublugh, and I made, promotion!'' Very good. The children have been doi- have been doin' good today. I mean theyuh, the slow- I mean uh, the younger one [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|pooped all over the place]]. Ugh, that was a whole bunch to clean up. And, uh... and the older one missed the toilet! I didn't know what to do with that, 'cept to clean it up, and tell her that it was wrong to do it in that direction, not to [[Rosechu#Transgenderism|aim it this way]], that. So I've been cleanin' and cookin' and keeping house all day long. ''And I've been out journalism all day.'' Yeah. ''[Pause]'' Anyway uh, today was grocery shopping day so I went out for groceries. S- an' children ha- and children... went with me. I took them along with me. And, they were okay in the car for a little while but then there was a scr- then on the way home there was a screaming. Yeah, the younger one was tired. Just waawaawaawaawaa. Waaa. ''[Pause]'' So the older one kept- kept the, uh- kept the younger one quiet, you know. At least she knew better. So, she calmed him down. ''That's good.'' I had to change a few diapers to- I had to change a whole number of diapers for that little one. What a mess. But I'm willing to go through with it, because I am the father! The house husband. ''And I'm the one that goes out, make the money.'' Okay. So. Wanna end the show. ''Why not?'' The puppet show. Alright. Yeah. Sonichu babies! Yaaay! Dudududududuh!

''[Feet come back into view]'' Dududududududuh! Duh duh! ''Thank you very much, goodnight!'' Goodnight.

==See also==

*[[A Sonichu Day]]
*[[Sonichu 3]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[A Workout]]|nextlink=[[PlayingHouse]]}}
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Talk:CWC to Mr. Miyamoto-san

2010-09-24T02:43:59Z

Boop:

==The obvious==
"Mr. Miyamoto-san" is redundant, he's saying "Mr. Mr. Miyamoto." Find an appropriate wiki link to explain the usage of the term "san" and note that. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 20:12, 28 April 2010 (UTC)

:* Gimme a day or so, I'm sure I can write something about Japanese honourifics with a few sources. -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 22:33, 28 April 2010 (UTC)
::*No need. I think what's already in the article is all Champthom was asking for. Adding any more to it might be excessive. --[[User:Jewlay|Jewlay]] 23:27, 28 April 2010 (UTC)
::*Actually, I played around with it but yeah, it seems Jewlay is right. What I was gunna add was basically a copy/paste from Wikipedia anyway, so... -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 12:35, 29 April 2010 (UTC)

==Error message?==

What's going on with this article? Anyone else getting a partial error message as the actual text of the article? - [[User:Boop|Boop]] 19:40, 23 September 2010 (PDT)
* disregard that i suck cocks - [[User:Boop|Boop]] 19:43, 23 September 2010 (PDT)

Talk:CWC to Mr. Miyamoto-san

2010-09-24T02:40:09Z

Boop: /* The obvious */

Song for Jackie.MOV

2010-09-16T21:27:17Z

Boop: /* Transcript */

Talk:Song for Jackie.MOV

2010-09-16T21:26:37Z

Boop:

Oh my heavenly God... --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 13:47, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

Transcribing, should be done soonish? - [[User:Boop|Boop]] 13:54, 16 September 2010 (PDT)
:Arrr, ya beat me, ya scurvy scallawag! Anyways; Un-fucking-beleivable. It's the 'Falling Towers' video all over again.--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 13:56, 16 September 2010 (PDT)
::Done transcribing...jesusfuck. There's parts of it I couldn't really make out, sorry guys. - [[User:Boop|Boop]] 14:26, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

Chris is BACK!--[[User:Wintermute|Wintermute]] 13:57, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

Evidently, Chris has no idea how racist this is and how doubly creepy it is. Mr. Popo is so creepy that DBZ Abridged made it a running joke. [[User:Ganondorfdude11|Ganondorfdude11]] 13:58, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

Is that what the japanese think Arabs look like?--[[User:Wintermute|Wintermute]] 14:03, 16 September 2010 (PDT)
: http://dragonball.wikia.com/wiki/Popo That's all it says (and what it says is pretty damning), I suppose you'd have to ask Akira.--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 14:13, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

I've got a vague transcription, I'll stick it on the page but there are quite a few [unintelligable]s and I am a n00b so forgive me. [[User:Enibure|Enibure]] 14:06, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

I believe he's actually sort of cosplaying [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mr._Popo#Mr._Popo Mr. Popo], a minor character from DragonBall Z. --[[User:ErsatzHouse|ErsatzHouse]] 14:15, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

for the ending part it sounded to me like "ain't no saiyans on the fiddle", am i alone in thinking this --[[User:Phlegethon|Phlegethon]] 14:21, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

==Song?==
Can we get the sauce on the song playing in the background?--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 14:08, 16 September 2010 (PDT)
:"Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm" by Crash Test Dummies. [[User:Ganondorfdude11|Ganondorfdude11]] 14:14, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

Talk:Song for Jackie.MOV

2010-09-16T21:26:19Z

Boop:

Oh my heavenly God... --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 13:47, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

Transcribing, should be done soonish? - [[User:Boop|Boop]] 13:54, 16 September 2010 (PDT)
:Arrr, ya beat me, ya scurvy scallawag! Anyways; Un-fucking-beleivable. It's the 'Falling Towers' video all over again.--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 13:56, 16 September 2010 (PDT)
::Done transcribing...jesusfuck. There's parts of it I couldn't really make out, sorry.

Chris is BACK!--[[User:Wintermute|Wintermute]] 13:57, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

Evidently, Chris has no idea how racist this is and how doubly creepy it is. Mr. Popo is so creepy that DBZ Abridged made it a running joke. [[User:Ganondorfdude11|Ganondorfdude11]] 13:58, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

Is that what the japanese think Arabs look like?--[[User:Wintermute|Wintermute]] 14:03, 16 September 2010 (PDT)
: http://dragonball.wikia.com/wiki/Popo That's all it says (and what it says is pretty damning), I suppose you'd have to ask Akira.--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 14:13, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

I've got a vague transcription, I'll stick it on the page but there are quite a few [unintelligable]s and I am a n00b so forgive me. [[User:Enibure|Enibure]] 14:06, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

I believe he's actually sort of cosplaying [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mr._Popo#Mr._Popo Mr. Popo], a minor character from DragonBall Z. --[[User:ErsatzHouse|ErsatzHouse]] 14:15, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

for the ending part it sounded to me like "ain't no saiyans on the fiddle", am i alone in thinking this --[[User:Phlegethon|Phlegethon]] 14:21, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

==Song?==
Can we get the sauce on the song playing in the background?--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 14:08, 16 September 2010 (PDT)
:"Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm" by Crash Test Dummies. [[User:Ganondorfdude11|Ganondorfdude11]] 14:14, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

Song for Jackie.MOV

2010-09-16T21:25:06Z

Boop: /* Transcript */

Song for Jackie.MOV

2010-09-16T21:24:08Z

Boop:

Song for Jackie.MOV

2010-09-16T21:22:25Z

Boop: This transcript sucks, sorry.

'''Song for Jackie.MOV ''' is a very strange video uploaded 16 September 2010. In another failureific attempt to impress [[Jackie]], Chris dons [[Niggos|Blackface]] and a [[Chris and Race|towel on his head]] while [[Chris and Music|"singing"]] to [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mmm_Mmm_Mmm_Mmm| "Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm"] by [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crash_Test_Dummies| Crash Test Dummies]. Note that "singing" is in quotes because Chris's grating mumblings make even Chris's [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys|ill-fated music career]] sound like a classically-trained soprano by comparison. He rounds out the performance with an impromptu [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Minstrel_show| minstrel song]. At this point, Jackie's reaction is unknown...

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = Song For Jackie
| video = {{#ev:youtube|TzAJvMKQeJA}}
| stardate = 16 [[September 2010]]
| subject = {{Music|[[Chris and Music|Music]]}} {{[[Chris and Sex|Sex]]}}, {{Racism|[[Niggos]]}}
| style = {{Crazy|Crazy}}
| shirt = {{DenimJacket|text}}
| previous = [[XBox is OK.MOV]]
| next = [[Current]]
}}

===Transcript===

Allo. I am the djinni with glasses "Mister Popo"''].
[''Nods sharply, turns music on'']

[''Accented''] I tell you story. It is a good story. You will enjoy story. [''nods again'']

[''Singing'']
Once, there was a boy who
Was born with some autism but yet made a few friends but after his high school years he lost his friends and was still[?] tortuured
By boys who were jealous of his material things

[''Wags finger''] [''Accented again'']Nononononono.

[''Hums along with song for a bit'']

Once there was this girl who couldn't [tinger?] to have friends long after high school, she would have had a bigger man but then she found the wayward lost boy!
They matched up very well heavenly matched...
Loooord[?] he was so[?]...

[''Hums along some more'']

[''Starts to come in at the wrong place, checks himself and keeps humming'']

[''Nods head again'']

And both [''starts to say 'boy', turns it into 'girl'''] boirl and boy were glad as they both saw each other's eyes...
When they met[made?] up they both thought of each other very often... They had enjoyed each other's company sweetly ohhhh
Rollercoaster ecstacy in fantasy their days were simple
And, they looked to be married and have their own booooy, and girl

[''Speaking''] It's true! Wait for the marriage invitation!

[''Hums along some more'']

[''Suddenly animated, imitating fiddle player''] And there ain't no [sames?] on the fiddle, no [sames?] on the fiddle like this! Ain't no [sames?] on the fiddle, no [sames?] on the fiddle like this!

I [unintelligable baba?] hohoheybabo
I [unintelliagable baba?] hohoheyahoh

There ain't no [sames?] on the fiddle, no [sames?] on the fiddle like this! Ain't no [sames?] on the fiddle, no [sames?] on the fiddle like this!

[Sounds like "Ahsanatehbavahohoheyahoh"]
Ah sang yer ting bava hohohheyahhoh[?]

[''Speaking again''] Happy loving between me and Jackie! I love you sweetheart. Boiing!

'Ello. I am glasses wearing genie, Mr. Popo. [nods and folds his arms, then turns on audio.] I tell you a story. It is a good story. You will enjoy story.

[''starts 'singing' ''] Once there was this boy who was born with some autism and yet made a few friends, but after his high school years he...lost...his friends and was real tortured. But bullies who were jealous of his material things [wiggles his head from side to side and waggles his finger] Nonononononono. [''hums'']

Once there was this girl who continued to have friends long after high school. She could have had her pick of men. Then she found the wayward lost boy. [mumbles next lines] A big, strong, very well, heavenly masked [???] Lov...elysoul! [???]

And those girl and boy were glad when they both saw each other's eyes. When they met up. They both thought of each other. Very often! They had enjoyed each other's company sweetly. Oh, roller collar ecstasy. In fantasy, their days were simple and they looked to be married and have their own boy and girl. It's true! Wait for marriage invitations!

[''bounces and mimes fiddling''] Ain't no stains on the fiddle! [???] Ain't no stains on the fiddle like this! My son your day wa ha ho ho way a ho! [???] My son your day wa ha ho ho hey a ho! Ain't no stains on the fiddle! Ain't no stains on the fiddle like this! Ain't no stains on the fiddle! Ain't no stains on the fiddle like this! My son your day wa ha ho ho way a ho! My son your day wa ha ho ho hey a ho!

[''spoken''] Happy loving! Between me and Jackie! I love you sweetheart. Boing!

==See Also==
* [[For My Sweetest Ivy]]
* [[A CWC Audition]]
* [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV]]

Talk:Song for Jackie.MOV

2010-09-16T20:54:47Z

Boop:

Oh my heavenly God... --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 13:47, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

Transcribing, should be done soonish? - [[User:Boop|Boop]] 13:54, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

To Jackie, with Love.MOV

2010-09-14T00:14:21Z

Boop:

{{quote|I love you... Come to me or I will come to you!|Chris confirming that he's a stalker.}}

'''To Jackie, with Love.MOV''' is the first of two videos Chris uploaded on 13 [[September 2010]]. In it, Chris declares his love for [[Jackie]] by showing her a slideshow on his new [[PS3]] while Crash Test Dummies "Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm" plays in the background. Chris spends most of the video [[creepy stare|staring at the camera]]. Chris shares his vision of what their date will be like, which includes [[Family Guy|going to see a movie]], [[McDonalds|going to a fancy restaurant]], [[University of Virginia|taking a walk in the park]], and returning to his house for some good old [[sex|hanky panky]]. [[For My Sweetest Ivy|Hmmmm, sound familiar?]] Chris also mentions that she shouldn't leave him because it would take "well over a month" for him to forget about it and move on to the next [[sweetheart]].

Chris also reveals Jackie's last name, which [[The Wallflower|you'd think he'd have learned not to do.]] Moments later, he tells her: "Come to me, or [[Rape|I'll come to you,]]" which doesn't exactly sound romantic.

[[Chris and camerawork|To no one's surprise]], the lighting conditions in [[Chris's room]] make it all but impossible to see what is going on the screen.

== Video ==
{{Infobox/video
| name = To Jackie, with Love.MOV
| video = {{#ev:youtube|HkpRvP-XucM}}
| stardate = 13 September 2010
| style = {{crazy|text}}
| subject = {{sex|text}}, {{galpals|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[Haters Gonna Hate.MOV]]
| next = [[XBox is OK.MOV]]
}}

== Transcript ==

[''Chris is standing in front of his television, holding a PS3 controller. He is displaying a slideshow on the TV and clicking through images throughout the video, many of them indistinguishable'']

This is for you, Jacklyn, my sweetheart! I want you so bad, you know, I need you. [''displays claw''] You completely- you completely so- you completely s- complete me so much. It's all so hard to explain, you get me so excited, you get me energized, I just wanna... JUMP! [''barely jumps, then bounces up and down''] I just wanna jump! [''throws hands in the air twice''] You get me so excited! Especially when I do things for you that you enjoy, that I helpcha do- I help it, uh, put together for you. It's just really awesome.

Besides, as said on my website, we're--we're so much matching in many things. And you know, I could do a lot of fancy things for our first date. Like, you know...[''gestures towards inperceptable drawing on the television''] Yeah, that's the first- that's the drawing right- that's a drawing right there. Hmm. I mean, yeah, sure, got a little... [''holds up controller''] gamey thingy here, but... you know what? It's a good way to project. Especially since I did the drawings firsthand by hand.

Anyway, for our first date, like I said, I would do it fancy but... I'm a simple kind of guy, you know... li- you know, nice little dinner for two, maybe a m- maybe a movie, a walk in the park, that sort of thing. So my fancy day is just mostly simple, really.

[''gestures towards new indistinguishable image on the screen, then continues to flip through images''] And anyway, little bit more of you. I meet you at your- I meet you up at your place or where we decide to meet up... [''stammers''] and then we head on out for our lovely date. We go- we'n go- catcha- we'n go catcha... we can go catch a movie. Maybe go see a Disney flick... and then make out [''???'']. Or we could go to an amusement park if there is one, and ride the rollercoaster! ''Psshhhhhewww!'' [''flails hand in the air and makes a stupid face''] Ride the ferris wheel... um, we're together, enjoying it.

And then we go to... restaurant, uh, depending on whether, uh, what can- what we can or where we would feel like going, would it be fancy, or, uh...inexpensive. [''gestures towards images on screen''] But this one was fancy, the one I put together for the first date here. Anyway, we just enjoy each other's company, and the food. It can be candlelit... because that is part of the fancy. But we're just gazing into each other's eyes lovingly, there's hearts between us. [''creepy smile'']

And then you just, you just grace me on the way- on our way to the park, where we can enjoy- [''stammers''] we can slide down the slide, I can push you on the swing, or just sit on the grass or whatever, enjoy the moonlight... MAGIC moonlight. Sit by a tree and mmmmake out.

And then when it comes to like- it comes to uh, the apex of our evening, I can pick you up to our car, the- take you back home! And then if you want to, we can go back in there and really m- and really make love...[''points and raises arm heroically''] I'll wear protection! Because I love you and I care about you very much. More than anything. [''suddenly shouting''] I need you! I need you, Jacklyn! I don't ever want you to leave me! I need you! I want you! So much!

[''normal tone resumes''] I don't ever want you to leave me, 'cause if you leave me now, you'd just leave me very sad. It'd be so much heartbreak, I'd be torn- I would be... down for... well over a month. I don't even want to think about it. Don't even wanna think about it.

[''shouting again''] But I love you, Jackie! I LOVE YOU! I love you, Jacklyn [''???'']! Come to me, or I will come to you! And we will enjoy- and we will dance the night away... or hang the day away, and see where it goes from there. [''points at nothing'']

You make me jump. You make me jump! [''throws arms in the air and then slaps them to his torso''] I love you so much! [''another torso slap''] I can't stand it. I really can't stand it.

[''pauses for 6 full seconds and stares blankly'']

Nothing's gonna come between us, sweetheart. It's you and me forever. I love you.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Haters Gonna Hate.MOV]]|nextlink=[[XBox is OK.MOV]]}}

{{Sweetheart Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Talk:Jackie

2010-09-13T22:24:56Z

Boop:

tl;dr: This woman decided to contact us and wants to tell other women not to go out with chris. she doesn't know how the wiki shit works so just like...i'm handling it for now. so yeah. okay. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 04:23, 22 April 2010 (UTC)

and apparently now she's back with chris for some reason. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 14:35, 13 September 2010 (PDT)

* I'm assuming this is the same woman as in the Jackie e-mails, right? - [[User:Boop|Boop]] 15:24, 13 September 2010 (PDT)

Talk:Chris and Spanish

2010-09-02T01:22:45Z

Boop: /* Accent */

==Renaming==
*I see what you did there, Eamoo, and its great. i was thinking, wouldnt you want to rename the "Works in which CWC uses Spanish" for somethin else?, cuz of the mumble and okcupid--[[User:Rosechupenis|Rosechupenis]] 04:34, 18 May 2010 (UTC)

Coincidentally, I had thought to make a Spanish page just earlier today. I didn't envision it so much as a list as an actual article, but that's still kinda spooky. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 16:22, 18 May 2010 (UTC)
*I have though about adding a section in chris and race for chris and other languages, but maybe could i put here?[[User:J0haely|J0haely]] 17:15, 18 May 2010 (UTC)
*The only other language Chris is even aware of as far as we know is Spanish. Put it here I suppose. Put a bit in Chris and Race too though. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 17:21, 18 May 2010 (UTC)
**though chris "uses" (and that's being generous) japanese in random random intervals, such as the -chan and -san and the shin all of which he knows nothing about what their meanings or uses are.[[User:J0haely|J0haely]] 17:24, 18 May 2010 (UTC)

==Merge==
We already have [[Ricardo Weston Chandler]] for this purpose. I suggest we merge the two pages. Perhaps it is more intuitive to make the page name "Spanish." Thoughts?--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 17:26, 18 May 2010 (UTC)
*it would be a good idea since there isn't much we can work this out of.[[User:J0haely|J0haely]] 17:32, 18 May 2010 (UTC)
*I think we should make the pages more distinct from eachother. Make this page about Christian's abuse of the Spanish language and make the RWC page focus on the name itself. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 17:42, 18 May 2010 (UTC)
**I think that adding a section outlining Chris's abuse of the language will help the article, but it will remain a stub article. And the RWC article can't be elaborated on much more that it already is. I feel merging the articles will help them in this respect. [[User:Zephed|Zephed]] 21:34, 18 May 2010 (UTC)
***Hellz yeah. Merge the pages.-[[User:Trombonista|trombonista]] 15:31, 23 May 2010 (UTC)
****Merge dis bitch--[[User:Wintermute|Wintermute]] 00:23, 13 June 2010 (UTC)
*** I think that merging is a good idea. I made a start of an 'abuse of Spanish' section, but I didn't have the time or the expertise to get very specific. ---[[User:ConCat|ConCat]] 05:46, 14 June 2010 (UTC)

*Finally done. As I said before, I sorta intended the "Ricardo Weston Chandler" page to sorta work out to be this sort of page but this sort of page manages to capture what I had in mind in the first place. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 06:03, 14 June 2010 (UTC)

==Chris's "mastery" of Spanish/to do==
I'm not a big fan of the whole "Why Spanish Speakers Hate Chris" section as it's too vague. I suggest we document ''how'' exactly Chris fails at the Spanish language (mispronunciation, failure to add a tilda over "anos" so it means "anus," etc.) to underscore Chris's claims of his mastery of the language. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 06:03, 14 June 2010 (UTC)
:i'll do that tonight. i'm a native speaker so i can point out all the flaws.[[User:J0haely|J0haely]] 11:17, 14 June 2010 (UTC)

==Accent==
Is it just me or does Chris have an extraordinarily thick American accent when he speaks spanish? Maybe we should add that to the article[[User:Banzai881|Banzai881]] 11:33, 13 July 2010 (UTC)

* How long did it take you to figure out that one? I'm pretty sure anyone who made it past middle school Spanish knows that Chris can't pronounce jack. No idea why it would need its own section. - [[User:Boop|Boop]] 18:22, 1 September 2010 (PDT)

== "As is common on the Northwest Coast" ==

Sauce? I'm not really sure that this is the case in the Pacific Northwest, and coming from the same region as Chris (Mid-Atlantic, NOT the South), I can tell you that the European dialect is NOT commonly taught in our region. --[[User:SeventhBase|SeventhBase]] 18:37, 19 July 2010 (UTC)

Talk:Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 9

2010-08-10T05:24:33Z

Boop:

Hot damn another one. I'm downloading now, and I guess I'll volunteer for the first five minutes of BITCH TRANSCRIBING!--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 05:09, 26 February 2010 (UTC)
* Think I'll pick up where he left off. This one looks like it's gonna be fun. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 14:32, 26 February 2010 (UTC)
** At 41:06, I think I hear a sickening belch on Chris's end. Is this significant? --[[User:DonB|DonB]] 20:39, 27 February 2010 (UTC)
***My personal standard is that if it's hilarious or disgusting, it's significant. The belch is both.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 02:47, 2 March 2010 (UTC)

Isn't there any more audio? It just ends at Alec saying "mis-" at 46:07. --[[User:Mikhail Faulken|Mikhail Faulken]] 06:09, 26 February 2010 (UTC)
*Chris hangs up, hence why the call ends abruptly. --[[User:Bystander|Bystander]] 06:18, 26 February 2010 (UTC)
**Godjesus, what an asshole. --[[User:Mikhail Faulken|Mikhail Faulken]] 06:21, 26 February 2010 (UTC)
***Chris just gives always the same answers " the trolls, the slander, the stress", but this is the phonecall with the biggest count of stress sighs so far. [[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 06:32, 26 February 2010 (UTC)
==Alec Benson Leary==
Is the greatest man that ever lived.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 06:33, 26 February 2010 (UTC)
*I second that motion!--[[User:AdderCress|AdderCress]] 07:18, 26 February 2010 (UTC)
*I have to support this. How many people dared calling Chris a liar and a hypocrite to his own face? On the level of intensity, this is on par with Kacey's Father Call. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 15:23, 26 February 2010 (UTC)
*I agree whole-heartedly. '''[[User:Odettafag|Odetta]]''' [[Image:moemon 492.png]] 03:35, 27 February 2010 (UTC)

my favorite part is when alec forgets who he is. lol [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 20:21, 4 April 2010 (UTC)

==I've Learned Something==

It seems that Chris is unable to tell the difference between a parody and a remake. Also, Alec needs to start saying things like "If you go ten seconds without giving me a correct answer, I'll assume you were going to say yes. One, two.....". Also, Chris clearly isn't thinking--he's stalling for time. And have him turn off the TV all the time, I'm certain he's using it to distract himself from Alec.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 14:59, 26 February 2010 (UTC)
:I don't think I agree with that. I think he was just trying (and failing) to say that deriving something that's already derivative isn't cool. I don't think he realized that he was admitting Sonichu was derivative when he said that. Here's a thought though: Earlier in the call Chris says he disagrees with Alec's claim that sandy is still a ripoff of Simonchu because he's basically Simonla, (remake of a remake) then later cites the robot chicken episode about Remaking remakes as proof that remakes are bad.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 15:28, 26 February 2010 (UTC)

:I don't think he stalls for time. Two of the immutable laws of being Chris are: A) My actions are always justified and B) I have all of the best qualities of humankind. Often times, those two laws don't reconcile, but as much as he's coddled, he's rarely put into a position to reconcile them. I've noticed the longest pauses in these calls happen when Alec corners him into basically admitting he's being an unfair shithead (e.g. why is it okay for you to parody other people, but it's not okay for you to be parodied?). I think his brain is fervently looking for an answer that not only justifies his actions but doesn't make him look like the bad guy or less than perfect. But there is no answer like that in some of these questions, so he just sits there, searching for something that doesn't exist and unable to respond until he finds it. [[User:Alteceastlansing|Alteceastlansing]] 05:46, 27 February 2010 (UTC)
:: So when he was comparing his brain to a computer in the [[Father Call]], he was accurate, but in a totally different way. As opposed to his brain being 'random', it just locks up and/or shuts down when it comes up against a paradox. Poor bastard. - [[User:Liquid!|Liquid!]] 15:21, 27 February 2010 (UTC)

==If Chris wasn't so retarded...==
He would've actually had an argument that could've worked. When Chris and Alec were discussing Simonla and Chris suddenly went off on a tangent about Sonichu, if it had occured to the manchild to point out that Simonchu could be considered derivative of Sonichu, then he could've at least partially backed up his use of Simonla and backfired Evan's and Alec's argument against them. Anybody else notice that, or am I mistaken about Simonchu in this regard? [[User:BouncyTEM|BouncyTEM]] 14:20, 27 February 2010 (UTC)
* That would mean admitting by implication that Sonichu is a mere derivation of Sonic the Hedgehog/Pikachu. Chris ''has'' to concede that Simonla is the exclusive intellectual property of Evan because it bolsters his own claim that he has full copyright over Sonichu. His mistake from his point of view was openly admitting that he used Evan's design. That said, what you're suggesting probably never occured to Chris because he's an incorrigible cretin. [[User:Blusko|Blusko]] 13:57, 28 February 2010 (UTC)

==Stardate?==
Chris says that his birthday was yesterday during the audio, which would place the recording on February 25th. However, the listed stardate is February 18th. I'm not sure if anyone has more accurate information. - [[User:Boop|Boop]] 21:42, 7 August 2010 (PDT)
* Fix'd. - [[User:Boop|Boop]] 22:24, 9 August 2010 (PDT)

Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 9

2010-08-10T05:24:03Z

Boop: fixed date.

'''Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 9''' is the ninth call between Chris and Alec, which took place 25th February 2010.

==Summary==
The call begins with [[Alec]] asking [[Chris]] how his birthday was and then asking about his reasoning behind the recent disturbing developments in [[Sonichu 10]]. Alec points out some notable [[hypocrisy]] in regards to Chris's use of [[Chris and anger|violence]] in issue 10, given that Chris has criticized the [[Asperchu]] and Sonichu Revolution comics for using a lot of violence. Alec goes on to call out Chris for trying to weasel out of the conditions he had agreed to in earlier phone calls and telling him off for not listening to him...again.

Chris defends his actions with the always amazing excuse that "he was still filled with anger," which, you know, totally makes everything O.K. Alec also points out that "apologizing" is not quite equal to "violently murdering the people you wronged in your shitty comic." The two argue about the issue of [[Simonla]], and the fact that Chris didn't exactly kill her in the manner promised AND introduced the character "Sandy", Simonla's daughter, defeating the entire purpose of eliminating Simonla. They discuss [[copyright]] and Chris's misunderstanding of the concept, in addition to Chris's massive [[ego]].

Chris-chan's Love Day is brought up. Chris denies ripping off ''Independence Day'' and claims that trying to make his own birthday a national holiday isn't completely unreasonable in any way, shape or form. Chris states that the Mexican Flag Day (which is coincidentally the same day as his birthday) "could be better," which implies that it "could be better" by celebrating his birthday on a national level AND he says that there should be a second day in addition to Valentine's Day to celebrate love and his birthday "just feels right." When Alec mentions that he's definitely creating a dumb ass cover-up for wanting his own birthday to be a holiday, Chris dances around the question like a drunken retard ([[Alcohol|how fitting]]).

Chris also admits he likes it when people kiss his ass, which has been [[Ego|kind of obvious]] for a long time. He then proves he knows nothing of Christianity ([[Religion|also obvious]]). Chris also admits he believes Simonla has always been his and tries to explain why it's not O.K. to [[parody]] a parody (it's as retarded as it sounds). In addition, Alec catches Chris in another [[lie]] about how many pages he had done. Chris blames the [[trolls]].

The call appears to end with Chris hanging up mid-sentence.

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/Audiofile
| name = Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 9 Part 1
| audio = {{#ev:youtube|_Ae7T05cIJQ}}
| Stardate = 25 February 2010
| Featuring = [[Chris]]; [[Alec]]
| Saga = {{Asperchu}} [[Asperchu]]
| previous = [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 8]]
| next = Current
}} </center>

===Transcript===
'''Alec:''' Hey Chris, it's Alec.

'''Chris:''' Oh. Hi, Alec. I was not...

'''Alec:''' Hey, Happy birthday!

'''Chris:''' [''Annoyed''] I wasn't- okay, well I was not expecting you.

'''Alec:''' Yeah, yeah.

'''Chris:''' So, thank you.

'''Alec:''' Yeah. Yeah, how was, how was your birthday today?

'''Chris:''' My birthday was yesterday, and it was, it was, it was good.

'''Alec:''' Oh, oh, it was, it was yesterday?

'''Chris:''' I spent it with my family. Yeah.

'''Alec:''' Yeah. Yeah. Oh. Well, yeah, I saw the pages you got uploaded today. Um, yeah... Uh... What's up with that trial, Chris? That was kinda like, that was kind of, uh, out of left field. That was... I didn't expect that at all.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, well, you drew, you drew, you, uh, drew me, you drew, you drew me in a set- in a setup of, uh, the, of uh, being beared false witness from uh, from your, from your parody of my Sonichu. In, uh, comparison of uh, that, of the [[Liquid Chris|other Chris]] being the real one and not me, which I was the real deal. And then you set me on fire. And then recently, you per-, you portrayed me getting my head getting chopped off with a sawblade! With gory detail!

'''Alec:''' Chris, you didn't read that, that last page. Did you read the, um, the page? 'Cause, what happened there was, um, that was a picture of the real you in the comic, and I said, you know, like your head got chopped off but then you came right back and said "No, it's okay, we're just faking". I didn't, your head didn't actually get chopped off.

'''Chris:''' Hmm.

'''Alec:''' Yeah.

'''Chris:''' Okay, it could maybe have more obvious.

'''Alec:''' Well, if you read the text it would have been obvious. You know.

'''Chris:''' Hmm.

'''Alec:''' It, there was a lot, there was text there, I mean, I spelled it out. I specifically had you say "Don't worry, this is fake!", you know, "My head's not really chopped off. I'm fine." You know, um, you accuse me of using, er, well, not accused, of using violence, I do use violence, that's true. But I was just kind of, uh... It seems kind of weird that your comic has suddenly taken a ''very'' gory turn. I mean, like...

'''Chris:''' [''Interrupting''] It's just, it's just, it's just [[Sonichu Special 4|one time]].

'''Alec:'''But you said violence is wrong, though. One time's...

'''Chris:''' [''Interrupting again''] But I... Yeah, well, you, you, you did violence unto me, I was just returning the favor.

'''Alec:''' Oh, revenge is okay, though? Chris, you said violence is wrong. You didn't say it's okay in the case of revenge. [''long pause''] And, I'm kinda, I'm kinda curious, why is this trial taking place? Like, why are Alec and Mao and me, er, Alec and Mao and uh, Evan and Sean, uh, why are we on trial?

'''Chris:''' [''takes a smug tone''] Okay, let me see. The, uh, copy-, copycat, the whole bunch of copy-, copycat of practically everything from my, nearly everything from my books. Set me on fire, chopping my head off, false witness, and uh, oh yeah, how about wanting to kill Simonla Rosechu?

'''Alec:''' Um... Do you remember all the times we talked about Simonla? Where I explained to you that I wanted you to kill her because she's not your character, and Evan wanted her gone from your comic?

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Alec:''' Chris, you told me, you swore up and down to me that, that you understood the point I was trying to get across to you and that you understood what I...

'''Chris:''' [''Interrupting yet again''] Yeah I did, yeah I did understand that. Yeah I-

'''Alec:''' [''Shutting Chris down''] Well, no! You're lying to me, Chris. You obviously didn't.

'''Chris:''' No, I did, I did...

'''Alec:''' [''Refusing to put up with Chris's bullshit excuses''] God Chris, I can't believe, I cannot believe you did this Chris. You, you know I thought that you were just, you know, kinda going "Yeah, uh-huh" just mouthing along and pretending to understand and saying what I wanted to hear to get me off the phone. And you know, I said that to you. I asked you, "Are you doing that?" And you said "No," you said no. You, you promised you understood, you would comply, you believed what I was saying. But then this trial comes along and what you're telling me right now is apparently my words went in one ear and out the other with you. And you think that, that me and Evan did something wrong to you. You think that you have done nothing wrong? Do you seriously believe that we are, you know, antagonists and that you are just a saint here?

'''Chris:''' Hmmm. Let me think about that a moment. To ask my question best.

'''Alec:''' Okay, well, while you're thinking about it, remember: Don't tell me the answer that you think I want to hear. Tell me what you really believe. That's the answer that I actually want to hear, is what you really believe.

[''Tense pause. Chris is watching South Park in the background.'']

'''Alec:''' You know, I'm looking at... Uh, the page here where you had like 10 people simultaneously electrocute me. Sonichu says [''wimpy voice''] "Oh I'm not gay!"

[''Chris attempts to respond, Alec drowns him out.'']

'''Alec:''' Chris, how many times, how many times did I tell... Okay, another thing, apparently, you didn't listen to. How many times did I tell you that I never portrayed Sonichu as gay? I explained clearly to you. Because you thought that he and Asperchu are gay, and I explained to you, "No, they're just, they were just hugging because they're friends, they're close friends." And I thought that you understood that, but... Go ahead.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, but like it'd be, but the portrayal could be misconstr-, construed, especially with the, uh, all the pink, all the pink-hearted drawings that you did...

 '''Alec:''' Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And you did misconstrue it.

'''Chris:''' And the one, and the one where they were, the one where they were lying next to each other, in a bed situation...

'''Alec:''' Okay, okay, you did misconstrue it. That's true. And then you brought that up to me, and then I explained to you what it really meant. And now you apparently ignored that and just, you say, Sonichu says, "eeewww, you're portraying me as gay." I'm not portraying Sonichu as gay. I've never done that. The only gay characters in my comic are Wild and Simonchu... Well, Simonchu's bisexual. And, uh, I think that's it right now, actually. Well, Mitch, Mitch is gay in my comic. Although I haven't shown him having a lover yet. You know, none of my fans misunderstood that.

'''Chris:''' Hm.

'''Alec:''' I mean, not that it really matters, because the point is that you misunderstood it, you brought it up to me, and I explained it to you. I don't care that you misunderstood something, what I care about is that you apparently didn't even listen when I explained it to you. Because anybody can misunderstand something, but you brought it up to me, I explained it to you, and you made it sound like you did understand. But apparently you didn't.

'''Chris:''' Actually, I did understand, but I still had the anger and rage, I still had the anger against you. And I wanted to bear, I wanted to...

'''Alec:''' No! No. Why? Why would you have anger against me? If I explained...

'''Chris:''' One, uh, one big reason is continuing the adverts, continuing the blasphemous advertisements on my CWCipedia against me. Those are like...

'''Alec:''' [''shouting over Chris''] Oh, really? Hey, hey, hey, do you remember when I explained to you...

'''Chris:''' Especially, especially the ones declaring my birthday as Asperchu Day...

'''Alec:''' HEY! Chris. Chris! Do you remember when I explained to you last time that my ads are staying up there because you completely insulted me, and didn't respect what I wanted you to do in the apology video? But what you're saying me now is, you think that the ads are an attack on you. You're just completely forgetting what I told you before. Or maybe you're not forgetting it, maybe you're just choosing to disregard it. They were a direct consequence of your actions. You had the power to get rid of the ads and you did nothing. So how can you be mad at me for having the ads up? [''pause''] When I gave you several ways out, and you didn't take them?

'''Chris:''' Well, at least I, at least I, when, at least I went by your request and put, and hand-wrote all the apologies and everything, and killed Simonla.

'''Alec:''' Oh, oh no. [[Sonichu 10#Forgiveness...?|You said that me and Mao and Sean and Evan killed Simonla]]. That's what your comic says. Apparently you didn't fulfill that part of the requirement either. Because I wanted you to kill her, but you accused me of killing her. And then you killed us in your comic. What kind of apology is that? When... Okay, an apology is when you do something wrong, you acknowledge it, and you make reparations to whoever was wronged. An apology is not where, um, you attack the person that you owe an apology to.

'''Chris:''' Hmm.

'''Alec:''' It's like you said... It's like you handed me a bowl of ice cream, said, "Hey, here's some ice cream for you," but then just as I reached out for it, you threw it on the ground. That's kind of what it feels like. Chris, do you remember last time, I told you that you were the one who drew the Voltorb? You were the one who killed Simonla.

'''Chris:''' Hm. Yeah, well, requesting the death of one of my characters comes with a price.

'''Alec:''' I'm sorry, what was that?

'''Chris:''' And, and I had... I said request of the, request of the killing of one of my characters...

'''Alec:''' NOT YOUR CHARACTER. Not, no, Simonla was not your character. She was Evan's.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, but anyway, with all the writing, with all the writing...

'''Alec:''' "Yeah, but anyway"?

'''Chris:''' With all the, uh...

'''Alec:''' You said, "Yeah, but anyway." Are you acknowledging that Simonla was not yours?

'''Chris:''' [''pause''] I acknowledge that Simonla was not mine, but I did not...

'''Alec:''' You just, but, two minutes ago you said...

'''Chris:''' I did not care very much for all the anger and torments and that such abuse that I continued to get from Evan. Anger...

'''Alec:''' What, what abuse did you get from him?

'''Chris:''' Verbal, verbal abuse and...

'''Alec:''' Like how?

'''Chris:''' In the Mailbag.

'''Alec:''' He sent you e-mails requesting you to stop using the character that was his.

'''Chris:''' And then threatening me with, sic his lawyers on me...

'''Alec:''' Yeah. Because you were committing illegal acts against him.

'''Chris:''' Anyway, the point is, Simonla is dead now.

'''Alec:''' Yeah, well, no, the point is that, um, you apparently don't listen when I talk to you. That's my point. Right?

'''Chris:''' Hm. Actually...

'''Alec:''' Because you believe that you are in the right, and everyone else is in the wrong. And you... Is that your TV going in the background? Do you ever turn your TV off when you talk to people on the phone? That might be kinda...

'''Chris:''' I do turn my... Well, actually, I do turn the TV off sometimes. [''takes a self-righteous tone''] Alright, I'll turn it off now.

'''Alec:''' Well, thank you, I appreciate that. Okay.

'''Chris:''' Okay.

'''Alec:''' Alright. Thank you for that. Um, who is is [[Sandy]], by the way? Sandy, like Simonla's daughter?

'''Chris:''' Wild and Simonla's daughter. Yes.

'''Alec:''' How can Simonla have a daughter when she's not supposed to exist in your comic? You know, Evan might get pissed about Sandy existing.

'''Chris:''' Well, the, well, still, Sandy did not originate from Simonchu.

'''Alec:''' She kinda looks like, exactly like Simonla, but with, like, Lisa Simpson hair. She did originate from, she's like a clone of Simonla.

'''Chris:''' Well, she is not a clone of Simonla, she is a Ground-type rosechu.

'''Alec:''' Yeah. Isn't that what Simonla was? Do you even realize the point of getting rid of Simonla in the first place? It was because... Okay. Evan was mad about Simonla because Simonla was just a rip-off of Simonchu. And it looks like Sandy is a rip-off of Simonla, which by corollary makes her a rip-off of Simonchu as well.

'''Chris:''' [''long pause''] I disagree with that.

'''Alec:''' You can disagree all you want. Doesn't make it true. You can tell me the sky is orange as much as you want, it doesn't change the fact that the sky is blue. I mean, judges will agree with that one.

'''Chris:''' Okay, well, actually, still, Sandy does have an origin that's definitely not, definitely not one that Simonla was from. Explained lately, it's based off of somebody's, some other character.

'''Alec:''' She originates from Simonla.

'''Chris:''' She actually, she actually was born as a rosey...

'''Alec:''' From Simonla.

'''Chris:''' [''sigh, long pause'']

'''Alec:''' You know, this probably doesn't matter a whole lot, I bet you're never going to use Sandy again. I mean...

'''Chris:''' Oh yes I will! Because, because we need a constructor, we need, we need the main constructor in the city of CWCville, and Simonla was that, so now Sandy has to be the one who fills in Simonla's shoes.

'''Alec:''' Can't you just have, like, a construction crew? Like, you know, construction workers with vehicles? How can one person really do all the construction?

'''Chris:''' Simonla, Simonla was head builder, she did have a crew. And when you take out the leader the whole crew falls.

'''Alec:''' Okay, don't you think that crew... You know, I'm sure she had, like, a second-in-command, alright. Don't you think that her crew might feel kind of insulted that, um, you have, like, a person who is a week old just take control? Inheriting the crew. So you, you've got a construction crew that runs, like...

'''Chris:''' No, she was, she's not, well, she's not, Sandy's not going to take the reins prematurely like that...

'''Alec:''' You just said that...

'''Chris:''' She's going through heavy training.

'''Alec:''' Why? So she's child labor?

'''Chris:''' No, not child labor.

'''Alec:''' Well, she's like a week old, and you already had her assassinate people. I mean, that's...

'''Chris:''' The point of that was that they were revenged against Evan for having, for even thinking of killing off Simonla.

'''Alec:''' But you killed Simonla.

'''Chris:''' Because I was forced, because I felt forced to by, between, by y'all.

'''Alec:''' That's correct, we did force you to, because your refused to acknowledge that... Chris, what is copyright infringement? Give me your definition.

'''Chris:''' [''pause''] Copyright infringement...

'''Alec:''' Yes. I'd like to hear your definition.

'''Chris:''' [''another pause''] The misuse...of a character that originally belonged to somebody else.

'''Alec:''' Oh! Really.

'''Chris:''' Without their consent.

'''Alec:''' Okay, now, how does that connect to Simonla? You misused, you misused Simonla because she rightfully belonged to someone else.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, well, still, even still, even Sonichu was originally mine, and I have a copy-, I have the copyright registration forms to prove that.

'''Alec:''' So? What does that have to do with Simonla? You stole... Don't change the subject, Chris. You stole Simonchu and screwed around with him. Two wrongs make a right, is that, is that the case?

'''Chris:''' That is not the point I am trying to make.

'''Alec:''' Well, then, why do you...

'''Chris:''' That is fairly, that is fairly accurate though.

'''Alec:''' When we're talking about Simonla, why do you bring up Sonichu's copyright? What does that have to do with it?

'''Chris:''' Because you drew him, because you drew him in your pages without my consent, and then, and then made him look like, look like a homosexual. Or appear as such.

'''Alec:''' Why does what I... Why does anything that I do have anything at all to do with how you treat Evan and his property? Why do you want to punish one person for, for a wrong that you perceive another unrelated person doing?

'''Chris:''' Hm.

'''Alec:''' I am not Evan. Evan is not me. Chris, do you... Okay, this... Goddammit, Chris, this is just like, remember when you were complaining about how, you know, the trolls and ED attack you, and you used that as an excuse for why you treat me like shit? Why do you think it's okay to treat some random person like shit just because you've been treated badly, by other people that aren't related?

'''Chris:''' Okay, well, now, to correct you, it is not, I did not do it on a random person, quote unquote, I actually had reasons to do it against you and your crew.

'''Alec:''' I asked you why you stole something from Evan, which happened a long time ago, as I understand it, actually, well before I created Asperchu, and your response is that, you know, it's because of something I draw.

'''Chris:''' Well, I'm just saying, that was...

'''Alec:''' If I remember right...

'''Chris:''' ...why I did, why I didn't care for what you did very much, and that was what you did there.

'''Alec:''' Chris, when someone asks you a question, it's polite to respond with an answer that is relevant to the question. When I asked you why you think it's okay to steal Simonchu from Evan, please don't respond by going off on some unrelated tangent about how you don't like me.

'''Chris:''' Hm.

'''Alec:''' Okay? Now, if I remember right, on that Simonchu article, before you doctored it to make it look different, it said that it was like in August of 2008 that you, quote unquote, created Simonla. That's a long time, that's over a year before I created Asperchu. I created Asperchu not even three months ago.

'''Chris:''' Mm-kay. Hm.

'''Alec:''' Okay? Okay what?

'''Chris:''' Well, let me think about that a moment so I can properly answer the question about the, uh... The quote unquote character theft.

'''Alec:''' You know what, I don't really want to go over whether you think stealing Simonchu is right or wrong or not, because we've done that before, and you, you know, I was fooled, I thought that I had gotten some kind of response out of you, which turned out to be a complete lie. Because you, to this day, still believe that Simonla is yours and everyone else is evil. I just want to know why, why you think that you're perfect, and that everyone else who has a disagreement with you is automatically wrong.

'''Chris:''' Well, to correct you, I never thought that I was perfect! I am imperfect, for a few reasons...

'''Alec:''' You still think that you're better than everyone else.

'''Chris:''' And one of which is definitely the high-functioning autism.

'''Alec:''' Well, what, what the hell does autism have to do with you being a bad person?

'''Chris:''' No, I was just saying, that's one reason why I'm not perfect.

'''Alec:''' So if not for autism, you think you would be perfect? Do you really think autism is your only flaw? I don't think...

'''Chris:''' No, I have a lot of other flaws, I know that.

'''Alec:''' Yeah, I don't think autism... Of all of your flaws, I don't think autism...

'''Chris:''' But I'm just saying, I'm just saying that's, I'm just saying that is one of my flaws that makes me not perfect. I am not perfect, I never said that. I have never said that I was perfect.

'''Alec:''' You imply it by suggesting that Evan and I are evil people who, who made you kill Simonla, because she was yours! Gah, okay, now I'm really pissed off, Chris. I'm mad at you. Because, why... How many years have you been pissing and moaning at people about your copyrights, your precious Sonichu copyrights? But you don't give a shit about Evan's copyright, or my copyright, or anyone else. You just take whatever you want, and you act like you're in the right by doing so. Why do you do that?

'''Chris:''' Hm. [''mumbles''] Why do I do that... [''long pause''] Hm. Mm. Hm.

'''Alec:''' You have no response, do you?

'''Chris:''' I'm thinking! Can I think? Sometimes my mind's a little slow.

'''Alec:''' You've had, like, how many years of worrying about copyright?

'''Chris:''' [''heavy sigh'']

'''Alec:''' I would think you would be a master of copyright law by now, considering how important it is to you. I would think you would know copyright laws backward and forward.

'''Chris:''' I am not as knowledgeable as a copyright lawyer.

'''Alec:''' Chris, um... Let's change the subject a little bit. What's up with that, your [[Christian Love Day]] video?

'''Chris:''' Because, because it was my birthday, I was just making a stand against the trolls. And the internet bullies.

'''Alec:''' What stand?

'''Chris:''' That I'm not gonna be let-, that I'm not going to be thrust down by the likes of which... And I'm going to continue on.

'''Alec:''' You... You kinda just... I recognized that speech you used, you just took that from ''Independence Day''.

'''Chris:''' What?

'''Alec:''' You took that speech from...

'''Chris:''' I did not take...

'''Alec:''' Chris, that speech, that "We will not go down without a fight" speech, that was... That was lifted directly from, uh, ''Independence Day''. Remember that movie?

'''Chris:''' Well... I remember that movie, I saw it only once, and I did not know that those, that those lines came from that, that speech was actually written by a friend of mine.

'''Alec:''' So you can't even write your own speech?

'''Chris:''' I can write my own speech! But he, I let my friend do it for me.

'''Alec:''' Well, why do you think that your birthday should be a holiday in the first place?

'''Chris:''' Well, it, well, once, when it is a, it is a holiday in Mexico. They should be equally important holidays in America.

'''Alec:''' It's, okay, it's Mexican Flag Day. In Mexico. Mexico has, I dunno, what, like 40 million citizens, something like that? So, are you really saying that Mexican Flag Day is no more important than your birthday? Should 40 million Americans, or more, be celebrating your birthday?

'''Chris:''' I'm not saying, I am not saying that.

'''Alec:''' You said that your birthday should be of equal importance to Mexican Flag Day.

'''Chris:''' I'm just saying...

'''Alec:''' Well, I was wrong, I just, I just looked it up, Mexico is actually like 110 million people. I was way off. Okay, so, your birthday is more important than 110 million Mexicans.

'''Chris:''' I never said that. And I never said that anybody should celebrate my birthday on that day.

'''Alec:''' Chris, um, your first response when I asked you, like 90 seconds ago, I asked you, "Why should your birthday be a holiday?" And you said, "Well, it's a holiday in Mexico, therefore it should be of equal importance in America." That is exactly what you said.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Alec:''' And it's what you're thinking. You think that, you think that Mexican Flag day is just, not even good enough, right?

'''Chris:''' Well, it can be better.

'''Alec:''' It can be better?! It's a day for 110 million Mexicans to celebrate the freedom of their country!

'''Chris:''' And that, and that celebration could be, celeb-, could be accepted in America.

'''Alec:''' Well, why? Why would Americans celebrate Mexico's history? Americans have the fourth of July, that's when we celebrate our history. We have Flag Day too, like June 16 I think?

'''Chris:''' That's about, uh, I think that's about right.

'''Alec:''' Yeah. So we already have a Flag Day.

'''Chris:''' But still, I mean, we have these, we have the, the Messicans in America.

'''Alec:''' And I'm sure they can celebrate Flag Day.

'''Chris:''' Yeah. So, we should accept that and, and maybe celebrate as well in like a congratulatory way for them.

'''Alec:''' Well, then why wasn't your video, um, about Mexican Flag Day, instead of this made-up Christian Love Day?

'''Chris:''' My idea behind Christian Love Day is, like, the possibility of a second Valentine's Day.

'''Alec:''' It's like 10 days after the real Valentine's Day. Why would we need another Valentine's so soon?

'''Chris:''' [''sigh''] It's like we need more, it's like we need more reminders to love and care about each other.

'''Alec:''' Valentine's Day is a Hallmark holiday, sponsored by corporations to sell shitty gift cards and disgusting fake sugar candies. It's not about love. It's just a stupid corporate holiday. If you want, if you want to really celebrate love, you can do it at any time. You don't need a holiday.

'''Chris:''' It's to help us, help remind us to do so constant-, on a more constant basis.

'''Alec:''' Okay, so why your birthday? Why your birthday, of all the days in the year, why would you choose your birthday for this particular holiday? Unless it was about celebrating yourself.

'''Chris:''' Because it feels right.

'''Alec:''' What do you mean, "it feels right"?

'''Chris:''' It feels like a good dr-, a good day to celebrate something.

'''Alec:'''Yeah. Like Mexican Flag Day.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Alec:''' Chris, Chris, just admit that you just want... You really think that you're so important, that you're so saintly and perfect, that you think your birthday should be a holiday. Just admit that to me.

'''Chris:''' Well, I am not saintly or perfect.

'''Alec:''' But you think that you're such an important person that your birthday should be a holiday. Admit it. It's about your ego.

'''Chris:''' [''sigh''] Hm. I partially agree with you on that, but it's actually a lot more than just quote unquote ego.

'''Alec:''' What, what more could it be?

'''Chris:''' I am not sure right now because I cannot come up with the right, with the right ans-, with appropriate answer for that.

'''Alec:''' Well then, well then you shouldn't be trying to create a holiday... Chris, you shouldn't really be trying to do anything until after you've come up with a logical reason to do it.

'''Chris:''' Okay, well, I, okay well...

'''Alec:''' Countless times, countless times I've asked you why you do things, and you fall back on, "I'm not sure, it felt right." Or you use your emotions as an excuse, like when you brutally murdered me and Evan and Mao and Sean in your, in your sham mock trial. You know, [''mocking voice''] "because you were still angry about the ads!" Let's go back to that...

'''Chris:''' And another thing...

'''Alec:''' What, what other thing?

'''Chris:''' What, how you portray me and my, and my electric hedgehogs, even in a parodic way, as a, as a, as definitely mentally retarded for one characteristic.

'''Alec:''' [''talking over Chris''] Chris, how many times have you...

'''Chris:''' And then brutally killing, killing us off like you did...

'''Alec:''' You brutally killed me.

'''Chris:''' And then, and selling, and sexually expliciting us like that.

'''Alec:''' Sexually ex-

'''Chris:''' Where you said all that first.

'''Alec:''' Oh, so that makes it okay for you to do anything? Chris, how many times... Okay, okay, you accuse me of making a parody, and I can't even begin to count the number of times I told you Asperchu's not a parody, but you accuse me of making a parody like it's such an evil thing, um, how many times have you fallen back on describing Sonichu as a parody of Sonic and Pikachu, when people ask you? And when you do it, it's a good thing, you use it as a defense against attacks by Nintendo and Sega and other companies. Why is it, when you think someone else is parodying you, um, shit hits the fan? Why is that, Chris?

'''Chris:''' Well, for one thing, you have por-, you definitely have portrayed a sense of retardedness and stupidity and even worse in that sense. And then used, that came from me and my pages, and the videos, and put them in your book. Like, you definitely drew a dildo and a sports bra as among one of the things, as among two things that Asperchu was digging out of his chest in the first book.

'''Alec:''' Have you ever seen ''Team America''? You remember that movie?

'''Chris:''' Yep. Yeah, I've seen that movie.

'''Alec:''' Did you like it?

'''Chris:''' It was okay.

'''Alec:''' You remember how they made Matt Damon retarded in that movie?

'''Chris:''' Hm.

'''Alec:''' Well, they did.

'''Chris:''' Some of, some of those jokes do not hit me right away because they're not that, they're not that obvious to me. Or I don't know what's about the context of it. Like for example, the recent new ''Family Guy'' where Chris dates the Down's Syndrome girl, and then apparently the joke where she says "I'm the daughter of a former Alaskan...something."

'''Alec:''' Governor. It was Sarah Palin, Chris. It was about her.

'''Chris:''' Former Alaskan Senator, that was it.

'''Alec: ''' No, it was the governor.

'''Chris:''' But yeah, it was supposed to be, it was, I learned in an article in today's ''Washington Post'' that, uh, that apparently it was meant as an attack on Sarah Parin, and I did not know that when I first heard that.

'''Alec:''' Sarah P-A-L-I-N, actually.

'''Chris:''' But I was, at least I was, that was a general statement.

'''Alec:''' Okay, um, we're getting off on a wild tangent here. My question is, why is parody such a bad thing to you? When other people do it.

'''Chris:''' Uh, I do not understand half the question. Why is parody blind to me...?

'''Alec:''' Why do you think parody is bad when other people do it?

'''Chris:''' Oh.

'''Alec:''' I mean, it sounds, it kinda sounds like, if I had drawn you as a perfect, you know, super-strong master of the universe like you draw yourself in your comic, then you would have been fine with it, because I would have been kissing your ass in that case.

'''Chris:''' That would have been, that would have been considered, that would be considerably agreeable right there between us, yeah.

'''Alec:''' So you prefer that people just kiss your ass all the time?

'''Chris:''' It may, it may, it helps, it makes me feel better, it makes me feel encouraged.

'''Alec:''' It makes you feel better?! Chris, you're an adult, you really want people to kiss your ass all the time?

'''Chris:''' Well, yeah, not all the time.

'''Alec:''' Why can't you learn to deal with...

'''Chris:''' I don't want, I don't like, I don't like, I don't like constant abuse.

'''Alec:''' What constant abuse?

'''Chris:''' And torment and slanders and cursings.

'''Alec:''' Oh, what torment and slander and cursing? Hey, Chris, okay, okay, you don't like slander? What about all the lies you've told about me? What about, okay, remember a while ago you made a video trying to hypnotize people into hating Asperchu? Like you spoke in backwards Spanish or something? Remember when you cursed me with the death threats?

'''Chris:''' And I apologized for that.

'''Alec:''' No, no, no, no, not, no, you're not getting away with that bullshit excuse this time, Chris. Okay? You can't just do things, do horrible things, and then offer a fake apology afterwards. That's not okay. That's not what apology is. You know, you claim to be a Christian, this is really, do you really think this is what God wants his children to do?

'''Chris:''' Hm. You're right, it is not something that, uh, God would like.

'''Alec:''' Yeah, well, you're not a Christian.

'''Chris:''' [''shifts to a grim, offended tone''] I am a Christian. I am a baptized practicing Methodist...

'''Alec:''' No, no you're not. You don't practice... Baptism doesn't mean shit. You don't even try to practice what Christianity teaches.

'''Chris:''' Well, for one thing, I don't have a total understanding of all the rules, and, uh...

'''Alec:''' Well, you can't be a very good Christian if you don't understand the rules.

'''Chris:''' Of course, there's a whole lots of, to memorize, and, and it's...

'''Alec:''' [''mockingly''] Yeah, religion is hard, isn't it?

'''Chris:''' ...and, what is, God does want, one of the things God wants us to do is not to worry about every single detail.

'''Alec:''' But you worry about every single... Oh, no, no, okay, no, that's not how it works. God wants you to follow the rules that he lays down. God wants you to try to be a good person. You don't even try to be a good person. You are completely selfish, and you do whatever you want, and you demand that other people go out of your way for you, to do things as you want them to. And then when someone starts pestering you, you offer a superficial apology and hope that smooths it all over. And then you draw a comic, you know, negating even that simple apology, where you threaten people and murder them in your comic. Thereby proving that you were just lying to the person who, you know, thought that you actually understood the point he was trying to get across. God condemns lying, you know.

'''Chris:''' [''angry sigh'']

'''Alec:''' Admit that you lied to me when you said, when you agreed with me that you didn't have a right to use Simonla. Admit that you have always believed that Simonla is yours.

 '''Chris:''' [''long pause''] I'll admit...that.

'''Alec:''' Oh, okay. Okay, good, so all of our previous calls were just lies, then.

'''Chris:''' Not, no, not, no, they actually happened.

'''Alec:''' Yes, they happened, Chris, but your responses were lies. I know the phone calls happened in reality.

'''Chris:''' Hm. Anyway, uh, let me get back, anyway, uh, I don't mean to be all, but I want to get back to an early, to the earlier topic about, uh, what's wrong with you making a parody of a parody. Okay, well, okay, well, take a cue from what they did in one episode of ''Robot Chicken''.

'''Alec:''' I don't watch ''Robot Chicken'', so this reference means nothing to me.

'''Chris:''' Hm. Well, anyway, anyway, anyway, one...

'''Alec:''' Try explaining it to me without the use of TV references.

'''Chris:''' [''angry''] Consider a remake of a remake of an original movie! That was original as a blockbuster.

'''Alec:''' Okay... What about it? What about a remake of a remake?

'''Chris:''' It's not very good.

'''Alec:''' Sometimes they are. Sometimes remakes are better. Did you see the new ''Dawn of the Dead''? That was way better than the George Romero shit.

'''Chris:''' I have not, I have not seen either, I have not seen either ''Dawn of the Dead''.

'''Alec:''' You probably shouldn't, 'cause there's gore in it, and I know how much you hate that.

'''Chris:''' I don't mind, I don't mind gore, up to a certain point.

'''Alec:''' Well, obviously, given how gory your murder of me was. But, okay, I'm still having a little trouble understanding why, um, parody is okay when you do it, but not okay when someone else does it.

'''Chris:''' [''long pause''] Hm.

'''Alec:''' Because you proudly proclaim Sonichu to be a parody, but at the same time you accuse other people of doing parodies like they're doing a bad thing.

'''Chris:''' [''more stalling''] Hm. Okay, well, think about this. How about if somebody did a parody to Asperchu?

'''Alec:''' Yeah?

'''Chris:''' And made him look even more stupid and more retarded, and actually brutally killed him in all the blood and gory detail! Or had him sexually raped in a prison cell of all dudes! How would you feel if you saw that?

'''Alec:''' Uh, I don't think I'd give a shit, honestly. I mean, if it was well-done, I might kinda laugh at it. If it was meant to be a funny parody. See, I don't take myself completely, I don't take myself completely seriously like you do. I can laugh at my own foibles and I can laugh at the foibles of my comic. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

'''Chris:''' [''pause''] That is...a theory, yes. Though I am not one hundred per-, I'll, that is, a, a previous...

'''Alec:''' So you don't really agree with it, though? You don't think imitation is ever a good thing?

'''Chris:''' Not one hundred percent.

'''Alec:''' Because Sonichu's an imitation of Sonic. Then you must agree that Sonichu is a good thing.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, because it was, because it was originally meant in a positive light. But then I get all the inputs from the trolls and all that on the internets, and then that just plain ticks me off.

'''Alec:''' Okay, if the guy who created Sonic, I don't know what his name is, but if he came along and discovered your Sonichu comic, he would probably-

'''Chris:''' [''rudely burps'']

'''Alec:''' -See that at least half of it is just you attacking trolls... I mean, the comic's not even really about Sonichu. It's about you, and it's about your war against trolls.

'''Chris:''' Well, that's to be undone because, because I, because I have just, after I finish with book number 10 I will be making less appearances in the book, in the books, and then, and now it will be more about Sonichu.

'''Alec:''' Are you gonna do that reboot that we talked about?

'''Chris:''' There will be a form of a reboot, yes.

'''Alec:''' Why did you do these pages, then, if you're gonna do a reboot?

'''Chris:''' I mean, I mean, if I'm gonna be making less appearances in the comics, I figure I may as well let myself go out with a bang.

'''Alec:''' Um, no, no, Chris, Chris, I explained to you, a reboot is a complete restart. What happens in the reboot will have nothing to do with the comics that you've made thus far. And you know, you said you had like 30 pages, you only uploaded like...16.

'''Chris:''' That was the amount I had to complete number, book number 10. And the book is completed.

'''Alec:''' You said you had like 30 pages.

'''Chris:''' Well, right now I just wanted to get book number 10 out of the way.

'''Alec:''' But you said you were going to have like 30 pages up on your birthday.

'''Chris:''' [''sigh'']

'''Alec:''' So you went back on your word again.

'''Chris:''' [''angry''] Well, I overestimated myself!

'''Alec:''' What do you mean, "overestimated"? You said you had like 30 drawn and ready to be Photoshopped.

'''Chris:''' Well, just accept the fact that I had, I finished book number 10, and I had them all ready for Photoshop, and I uploaded them.

'''Alec:''' You know, if you have a deadline with a publisher and they're expecting 30 pages by a certain date, and you come to them and say, "Oh, yeah, here's 16 pages," they're not gonna be happy with you.

'''Chris:''' Hm.

'''Alec:''' And you didn't even upload them on your birthday, you uploaded them today. The day after. People who miss deadlines don't get paid.

'''Chris:''' Well, I had computer troubles.

'''Alec:''' Of course you had...

'''Chris:''' And I had to go out, and I had to go with my family to a restaurant to celebrate my birthday.

'''Alec:''' Sonichu is your job, Chris!

'''Chris:''' [''sigh''] That's another thing, you put them in the perspective of like, he's my job, it just makes me feel...

'''Alec:''' Well, you intend to make your huge money-making franchise, right? So yes, he is your job.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Alec:''' Yeah! And you don't take your job seriously!

'''Chris:''' [''sigh''] But, but you see, with that belief, with that definition, in the mentality of an artist, when the thing was originally supposed to be a work of art and creativity, then it just cheapens it.

'''Alec:''' Um, well, then, I could say it cheapened it when you started saying you intended to publish it and make money off of it.

'''Chris:''' [''sigh'']

'''Alec:''' So what you're telling me now is, you have no intention of ever making money off Sonichu. Because if it is just a work of art for its own sake, that's fine. But you keep promising, you know, deadlines that you miss, and you keep saying you're gonna publish it and make money off of it.

'''Chris:''' [''massive sigh'']

'''Alec:''' Do you not want to make money off Sonichu anymore?

'''Chris:''' No, I would like to make money off of Sonichu.

'''Alec:''' Well, okay. You're cheapening it, then, it's not a work of art anymore.

'''Chris:''' Because I had too many influx from bad people like the trolls!

'''Alec:''' What the hell do trolls have to do with it, Chris?

'''Chris:''' And also from, and also from...

 '''Alec:'''I have you as a troll, and my comic kept going just fine.

 '''Chris:''' And also from...

'''Alec:''' And how do trolls control what goes in the comic? Go ahead.

'''Chris:''' [''heavy sigh''] It's when they really tick me off, and then it just, it just, it's like putting, [[Sonichu_10#Curing_Da_Homos|it's like putting poison into the water supply]].

'''Alec:''' Why do you keep responding to trolls, then?

'''Chris:''' [''mega-sigh'']

'''Alec:''' And another thing, you have a really broad definition of "trolls," it seems. Because you think that people that ask you questions you don't like in your Mailbag are trolls. You think homosexual people are trolls just for existing, because you want to cure gays.

'''Chris:''' [''sigh'']

'''Alec:''' I think the ironic thing there is, gays would probably consider you a troll. Because you want to destroy their identity when they haven't done anything to you.

'''Chris:''' [''another sigh'']

'''Alec:''' You think I'm a troll, and I've been trying to help you.

'''Chris:''' Well, I'm sorry, sometimes things are, I have been trying to collaborate, I get misunderstood often, and it just really makes me feel like, I don't know, I feel like I'm being misunder-

[''Call cuts off'']

{{succession|label=[[Alec Benson Leary calls]]|prevlink=[[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 8|Chris and Alec Call 8]]|nextlink=[[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 9|Current]]|}}

==External links==
*[http://www.mediafire.com/?gzmndqjwz1x The original audio]
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Ae7T05cIJQ YouTube Version: Part 1]
[[Category:Phone calls]]

Talk:Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 9

2010-08-08T04:42:32Z

Boop:

Talk:REAL Protest against the FAKE

2010-06-27T16:16:36Z

Boop:

== Video removed 07/22 ==

Let's hope it's been archived... --[[User:Special|Special]] 22:08, 22 July 2009 (CEST)

==The Real Chris==

I love how the <s>fake</s> real Chris sometimes forgets what his voice is supposed to sound like and starts imitating Hank Hill. [[User:Llort|Llort]] 02:37, 23 July 2009 (CEST)
*Chris has always said "I tell ya what."--[[User:Zayce|Zayce]] 16:42, 23 July 2009 (CEST)
:*You'll have to post links to two or three articles of videos wherein Chris uses that exact phrase, because none are coming to mind. Prove me forgetful, good sir. [[User:Llort|Llort]] 19:43, 23 July 2009 (CEST)
:*I'm particularly interested in instances where he's saying not simply "I tell ya what" but "I tell you hwhut" exactly like Hank Hill does (and exactly like the <s>fake</s> real Chris does here). [[User:Llort|Llort]] 19:47, 23 July 2009 (CEST)
:*Whatever he usually says, this video is troll's gold. I mean, bitching about someone's nasal voice while your own voice sounds like your balls never dropped. Hilarious! --[[User:Hayate666|Hayate666]] 20:19, 23 July 2009 (CEST)
:*Yeah. He might've tied his old record for Most Voice Cracks in One Video with this effort. [[User:Llort|Llort]] 20:33, 23 July 2009 (CEST)

==Video quality==

Is it just me, or is the audio really, really quiet on this video?
anyone have a better version? - [[User:Boop|Boop]] 16:16, 27 June 2010 (UTC)

Talk:Fridays After Five

2010-06-20T19:51:30Z

Boop: /* This is fucking hilarious */

== To Do ==
I don't normally do this whole to do thing, but...
*<s>Get a gallery of this stuff up.
*put up the video like we have all his others.</s>
Maybe get some more background information, if we can.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 02:59, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
:That was quick.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 20:26, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

== What we can get out of this ==
These files prove that Chris is actually going to more social even its, influenced by rocky, but also we learned that he is creepy enough to wear his bra in public and he still dances like a turkey mating. Considering the bra is more like a "sign" of some sorts, could this be added into the "love quest" page?.--[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 01:55, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
:This latest turn of events has proven that Chris trolls himself harder than anyone else ever could. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 01:58, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
Chris is actually going out now, huh? I think it's clear it won't work and once Chris realizes this he'll be back to his old self again. Come to think of it, we could use this video to give him a false sense of paranoia, by claiming we have people following him. This could get us a nice reaction.--[[User:Hiiro|Hiiro]] 02:10, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

You know, the last time he was out this much was during his love quest, getting his ass kicked by jerkops and manajerks in the real world. Perhaps we can start seeing something similar in the near future? [[User:Bill Lumburg|Bill Lumburg]] 02:17, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

We can hope. In the meantime I called Chris and left a message saying that the trolls are now stalking him in real life now, going with Hirro's idea to give him paranoia. I figure we can try scaring him back onto the internet. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 02:24, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
:I also sent him an e-mail message linking to the videos recorded of him at the event with the subject stating that he was being followed. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 02:27, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
:Yay~ People liked my idea. But if we're going with it, we'll need more sightings. Also, Independence day surprise?--[[User:Hiiro|Hiiro]] 05:52, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

Yes... he truly has nowhere to run now. And I hope Clyde hasn't forgotten his promise for an Independence Day surprise. [[User:Bill Lumburg|Bill Lumburg]] 02:28, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
:I completely forgot about that [[User:Sinisterminister|Sinisterminister]] 04:00, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

He had better not have forgotten it. Because if he does, I'LL STRANGLE THAT CLYDE CASH! Seriously though. We need a PS3 hacking. Soon. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 02:30, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

I think we should all thank our greatest operative, Rochelle Shoemaker, for this bounty of lulz.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 02:36, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

Good thing this happened. Now to wait for him to check his e-mail, then my crazed troll plan will start... --[[User:Eniggy|Eniggy the Trollish]] 02:48, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

* I love how the first thing that popped into everyone's mind was "Gay Trucker"... That alone will be enough for Chris to loose his shit. On a side note, Chris now officially fails at dancing and public decency (If wearing a shirt that says "I love vagina" to a family event doesn't do it, I don't know what does) --[[User:SargentPickles|SargentPickles]] 22:53, 18 June 2010 (EST)
**/me waits for the cops to knock at his door... [[User:Eniggy|Eniggy the HAHAHA]] 03:05, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

Heh, this might have something to do with an email I sent him. I suggested he check out [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Desert_Punk Desert Punk] It's about a lecherous twat who's obsessed with getting laid, but women find him rude and repulsive. It's got plenty of fan service though, and the main character, despite being depicted as a loser when it comes to sex, is still standard anime fare badass-goofy (like Vash the Stampede in Trigun) so it should appeal to him. There is one story element that I was hoping Chris would see and not go over his head, the introduction of the loli character. To quote the wiki article
:"Kosuna is the former apprentice of the Shimmer Sniper. Her goal is to become the desert's number one "power babe" mercenary, meaning stronger than any man and more beautiful than any woman. After the Shimmer Sniper is defeated by Kanta, Kosuna follows him and constantly begs to be made his apprentice. Kanta highly objects at first but eventually accepts her after she shows him a picture of a large breasted woman Kosuna claims to be her mother, implying how attractive Kosuna would be in years to come. Kanta, a heavily perverted guy, can't help but accept her, though his personal motives are clearly to groom Kosuna to be his personal mate when she grows up."
Sounds like building a sweetheart from the ground up, 'eh? I never got a reply, despite sending it to his gmail, aol, and youtube accounts. If he did read it and check it out, this could be indicative of his apparent courtship of little girls. --[[User:Xanabit|Xanabit]] 04:51, 18 June 2010 (UTC)
:He wasn't courting little girls, the girls got near him because he had a DS and they wanted to play it too. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 04:54, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
::In that pic, maybe. Why else would he boogie down surrounded by delicious loli while wearing his new "attraction ensemble"? --[[User:Xanabit|Xanabit]] 05:02, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
:::You're putting way too much thought into this. Chris isn't a pedophile, he's just really, really stupid and socially inept. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 05:17, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
::::Neither was that character. Another episode had them sharing a sleeping bag the survive a cold desert night, and he freaked out. The intent is for Chris to get the idea that creating a close bond with one or a harem of loli will enable him to brainwash the little tykes into something he can fuck in a few years. The deviousness comes from the fact that Chris is incapable understanding boundaries and his idea that showing minors porn is "educational". --[[User:Xanabit|Xanabit]] 05:23, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
:Oh god, this was creepy. Spotting him amongst the crowd was like watching those 'Slender Man' videos, only it was insanely easy to find the horror. I think this proves that, when left to his own devices, Chris A) Acts more like a dumbass than ever before, or B) Gets himself into trouble with the law. I was afraid he was going to try to murder someone, but this proves he's a perfectly healthy human being. Also, I hope the little girl in the photo said 'no' when he likely offered her candy. --[[User:Inferno232|Inferno232]] 19 June 2010
::More likely, if he had any candy, he would have eaten it all himself. [[User:Sakanz|Sakanz]] 00:25, 20 June 2010 (UTC)

:You know what Chris? Stay off the internet. You're even more of a lolcow in real life. Seriously, this is hilariously creepy and awesome. Definitely add this into the Love Quest page, because his crappy "Captain Morgan" pose in multiple different places with his... bra sign... cruelly in plain sight of everyone is an obvious extension of his love search. Except I think the Gameboy and sign was slightly better for him, because at least then he could get sympathy. This is literally indecent and just disgusting. I'm a fat guy myself, and I'd never even consider just randomly taking my shirt off in a public place. Let alone if I was wearing a bra...([[User:KingoftheJuice|KingoftheJuice]] 05:58, 19 June 2010 (UTC))
::The only downside to that is someone has to be there to record him acting like a dumbass in public, or else we'd never know any of the shit he gets himself into. We lucked out this time. There's probably plenty of times he did stuff like this when noone was around to film him or take pictures of him and we'll never know unless Chris mentions it himself with plenty of bias, no doubt. [[User:Sakanz|Sakanz]] 00:30, 20 June 2010 (UTC)

== Started a video box. ==

Added the 100_0690.MOV thru 100_0692.MOV as a starter. [[User:Eniggy|Eniggy the still HAHAHA]] 04:23, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

==Why show his bra?==

Clearly, Chris doesn't have any compunctions about proving to the world that he wears women's underwear because he's a retard, but being that this was clearly a family event and he was wearing a shirt about pussy, could Jerkops have made him change? Any way of knowing? —[[User:Thepicklesuitintheman|Thepicklesuitintheman]] 05:38, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

:If he keeps coming back and someone complains, it's likely the jerkops will intervene. And this time, in front of hundreds of witnesses. [[User:Bill Lumburg|Bill Lumburg]] 05:51, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
* I would say, with something like this, Jerkops could have gotten him to change the shirt easily, though if this was a free event, which I wouldn't be surprised at all, they probably wouldn't fully enforce it. The bra, on the other hand, is completely different. If a woman was running around in her bra, yes, they would stop her, but this is ''Chris'' we're talking about here. Since he's a guy, I'm guessing they don't see many guys running around in bras, so they wouldn't think twice.--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 05:56, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
Can't he be charged for indecent exposure or dissorderly conduct or something?--[[User:Hiiro|Hiiro]]
* Probably not, since he's not actually indecently exposing anything. It's not illegal as far as I know for a man to go around shirtless, and this seems to be more of an outdoor community street fair, so I don't think policies like that can really be enforced. Even if they were, he's not technically shirtless, since he's wearing a bra. But he should definitely have to change the shirt, with so many little kids around. Well, at least it's better than the Mount and Dew Me one. Seeing as that one is a legitimately homosexual t-shirt. ([[User:KingoftheJuice|KingoftheJuice]] 06:02, 19 June 2010 (UTC))
** Yeah, in most every place I know of in the USA a man can go topless, though a woman can't. So Chris wearing a bra in public wouldn't be indecent exposure. [[User:BubblegumPinkButler|BubblegumPinkButler]] 23:45, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

== The innocent ==

The girl's face is blocked in the cropped photo but the one in the gallery remains clear. What's the policy then? [[User:Nechita|Nechita]] 06:35, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

It's a joke--[[User:Wintermute|Wintermute]] 06:48, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

== There are more photos ==

Post them all. --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 10:18, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
*[[CWCki:DOITFAGGOT|Get to it then]] :p. Also, we need an uncensored version of that one with the kid. Justification - 1) whoever made the set ("Archie Bunker") would have censored it if he felt like it was a concern for the child, 2) a child's privacy is probably not going to be threatened by inclusion in a picture, 3) I can't think of any troll who is obsessed enough to track down a girl who look at Chris in a picture just to get info or whatever from her. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 16:03, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
::Also it's badly edited - looks terrible. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 16:45, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

== Pokéwalker? ==

What the hell does he use that for?--[[User:OrsonZedd|OrsonZedd]] 14:16, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

I played a downloaded version of Heartgold so I didn't get one, but it's my understanding that you put one of your pokemon in it or onto it and when you walk around it gives the pokemon xp. So, he uses it to level up his pokemon. --[[User:Hellion|masta beta alum]] 14:29, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
:According to [[Wikipedia:Nintendo_DS_accessories#Pok.C3.A9walker|Wikipedia]]:
:''The Pokéwalker is a Poké Ball-shaped pedometer which can connect to Pokémon HeartGold and SoulSilver game cards via infrared signals. The player can transfer a Pokémon to the Pokéwalker from either HeartGold or SoulSilver. Every time the player takes a step, the Pokémon inside gains experience points and the player earns "Watts", a type of in-game currency which was also used on the Pokémon Pikachu virtual pet. Players can also catch various Pokémon on the device and obtain items, then transfer them to the game. The device comes bundled with the games.''
--[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 15:19, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
:* I confirm. I have seen such a device onto action and it is quite easy to accumulate xp. If I remember clearly, it gives the owner a single xp by step. So this will not influence the girth of our manchild. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 04:48, 20 June 2010 (UTC)
== I can't believe it ==
Why is he wearing a manbra with writing. and WHY hasnt the police arrested him or something for doing that.
T_T The poor children are scared....especially when he dances with em, what a PEDOFORK. >.<
[[User:BabyNeko|BabyNeko]]

* As long as he isn't causing a problem with it the messages on his clothing are technically covered by the first amendment. At least if it's on public property. ---[[User:ConCat|ConCat]] 15:42, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

== This is fucking hilarious ==

It's true... Chris trolls himself harder than we do.

I say we leave him off the internet for a while and observe him, see if he does more dumb shit. If not (or nothing out of the ordinary), we can always get him back with Hiiro's plan of making him paranoid. [[User:Doctor Nuriel|Doctor Nuriel]] 17:37, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
*I had thoughts of sending him an email full of shots of his house from Google Maps with the Google crap cropped out along with random gay porn pictures in an attachment to him to see how scared he gets. -- [[User:Eniggy|Eniggy the Cunning]] 17:51, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
** you are a huge faggot and that's a horrible idea. -- [[User:Boop|Boop]] 19:51, 20 June 2010 (UTC)

==Maybe it's just me, but==
In some of these videos/pictures, when Chris is standing with his back to the crowd, it looks to me like he's sticking his ass out as far as he can. Remember, Chris thinks he has a great ass (can't remember where he said that, so if you guys know please tell me), so it wouldn't surprise me if this was an intentional ploy to get a gal-pal, though it ends up looking unnatural and creepy. Best example: [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:100_0678.JPG this image] in which he is sitting, but in a manner which to me looks incredibly unnatural. [[User:Thelieisacake|Thelieisacake]] 18:30, 19 June 2010 (UTC)

:Don't remember him saying this, but totally possible. [http://cogsdev.org/w/images/thumb/0/02/0779-CWCREAR.JPG/450px-0779-CWCREAR.JPG Pic related.] --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 18:38, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
::He's definitely posing. What's more the only time he wasn't posing is when he was playing the Vidja. Every time he's trying to position himself to appear cool and relaxed, and ends up looking awkward and terrifying. I'm sure in his mind this makes him incredibly attractive to the ladies, but we all know how good Chris's mind is.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 20:29, 19 June 2010 (UTC)
:Isn't one effect of autism not knowing how to position yourself in a "natural" way? Chris might just fail at standing and/or posture. God knows he doesn't have much practice at either. -[[User:Schismtracer|Schismtracer]] 01:36, 20 June 2010 (UTC)

Mailbag 18

2010-06-18T18:38:21Z

Boop: Lawrence King got by under the radar, apparently. i lol'd

__NOTOC__After the success of [[Mailbag 13]], the [[CWCki:Operation Mailbag|Operation Mailbag]] project was continued. '''Mailbag 18''' is composed mostly of letters written right here on the [[CWCki]], with a few genuine letters thrown in for good measure.

[[Chris]] was expected to answer them in the late hours of 14 [[December 2009]], the same day they went up. Instead, he answered a few of them in the very early hours of the 15th, and then promised to get to the rest the next evening. He finally finished answering them on 18 December, in the very early hours of the morning.

==Answered==
===The question now is how does Chris pay his manager?===
{{Email|From: [[Wikipedia:Joseph Jackson (manager)|Joseph Jackson]] (josephwalterjackson1929@gmail.com)
Hello again Christopher,

First of all, thank you for answering my previous letter! Even at my old age (I'm 80 years young), I can recognize a genius when I see one, so it's an honor to have a correspondence with you. Here are a few more questions that I have remembered that I had wanted to ask you:

1. What caused your old pastor to perform a background check on you? I think that's a shocking invasion of your privacy, so I'm glad that you've found a better church.

2. Thank you for your advice regarding my son. I've tried to help him to the best of my abilities and even with my attempts to clean him up (he puts so much emphasis on his singing that his hygiene is quite poor), but he just ignores me. How do you think I should discipline him? I've tried just about everything, including restricting his internet and video game usage, but nothing seems to work.

3. Have you ever considered hiring a manager? In my experience dealing with the entertainment industry (I managed one of my son's careers many years back), I know that it is a very tricky and cruel business. Like I've said, you possess a powerful talent, so you should definitely look into safeguarding it.

4. I don't mean to invade your privacy, but can you tell me anything about your parents? They've done a terrific job of raising you, and I'm curious to know what techniques they used. They should be very proud of how you turned out.

5. How did you decide to devote yourself to creating comic books? I was browsing through your gallery of original artwork on the CWCipedia and I was surprised by the sheer variety of your artwork... from [[Pokemon]] cards to CD covers to magazine covers, and so on.

Again, thank you so much for opening up this line of communication to you. I look forward to seeing where [[Sonichu]] will take you in the future!

Sincerely,

Joseph}}
{{EmailReply|I am not sure why the pastor did that, and I agree that it was an invasion of privacy. Offer him a REWARD for keeping clean; for each time he cleans himself, give him a Star Sticker on a sheet, and when he has earned 10 or 20 Stars, you treat him to his most favorite treat, or a new toy. I have already hired a manger for advice, thank you. Mostly Tender Loving Care. It's something that I am good at, and it can be profitable. --[[User:ChrisChanSonichu|ChrisChanSonichu]] 06:28, 15 December 2009 (CET)}}

''It is likely that Chris is referring to [[Vivian Gee]], who offers Chris advice on advertising and other subjects.''

===Instead the courts were on the side of justice===
{{Email|From: Dan Ferraro (danqferraro23@gmail.com)

Chris,

I'm pleased to see that my favorite cartoonist is answering so much fan mail, and during the holidays when most people are so stressed out and busy! Some of these people are being extremely rude and I think you're handling it with a lot of poise and maturity.

I'm actually writing you because you've said in a video that you were asked to leave the Wolf Scouts (it was Wolf Scouts, right?) for your Autism. I know the Boy Scouts of America have undergone some high-profile lawsuits for excluding certain minority group, but I was wondering why they'd make someone with an obvious disability leave their group. This seems highly unfair and would be the kind of thing I'd make a big fuss out of it ever happened to my child. (I'm not meaning to imply that you're extremely disabled or low-functioning here either, I mean you can drive a car and graduate from college, which are pretty big accomplishments for an autistic person.)

Also there's the incident with the Green County School District where you say that multiple staff members held you down and recorded your screams: I might have some insight to this. Did you ever lose your temper as a child? Why, exactly, were they recording you? My wife works in Special Ed in the schools and they're actually allowed to restrain children that have violent temper tantrums if they're a danger to themselves or others. The faculty are all given extensive training to make sure they don't actually injure the child. Believe me, the Special Ed teachers are there to help the children grow into functional adults, not to hurt kids. Exactly how badly were you injured during this? I know this was almost 20 years ago but people have been able to sue and win for injuries that have happened long ago.

Sorry if I'm prying, my brother's an attorney who handles discrimination lawsuits, and my mind started wandering. Personally I would have sued the pants off of both groups. But that's just me.

Merry Christmas,

- Dan}}
{{EmailReply|We had tried to sue, but the courts were against us at the time.}}

===In which Chris believes he has magic powers (srsly)===
{{Email|From: Madison Glen-Ross (ker0pi1999@gmail.com)

Hey Chris!!

I love your Sonichu comics!! My friends and I always try to stay up to date on what's cool!! I have a couple questions I hope you can answer!!

1. I was wondering if you could tell me more about your real-life powers. They seem very interesting. Can you only curse and bless people, or can you do other things? How and when did you find out about your powers? Sometimes I wish I had powers in real life, but nobody I know has them so I don't think it's going to happen anytime soon. You must be really special!!

2. How come you don't wear those spiky wristbands and tattoo sleeves anymore? I had a bunch of those wristbands like Avril Lavigne but the school made me stop wearing them. Whatever!! Anyways I think they're really cool so you should wear them more often!!

3. Do you think it's all right for you to force your religion on people? I mean in the Sonichu comics you're supposed to dump a bunch of chemicals in the water supply so people will stop being [[gay]] so they'll get into Heaven. What if they're already happy being gay? And since heaven is where you get to do whatever you love to most, they'll just start being gay again once they get into Heaven. And what's the big deal with being gay anyway? You said yourself that the Bible's just a guideline and you don't have to do everything it says to be a good person. My uncle Ricky is really really gay and he's the nicest sweetest guy ever!! He's a Priest so I'm sure he's getting into Heaven.

Anyways have fun!!

Madison, age 10

<3 <3 <3 <3

xoxoxoxox

PS PUT BELLA AND EDWARD FROM TWILIGHT IN YOUR COMICS!!}}
{{EmailReply|Thank you for your kind loyalty and encouragement. I have learned about the [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|Curses]] actually working firstly when I cursed the real-life [[Mary Lee Walsh]]; then I later heard that her reputation at [[PVCC]] went DOWN (yes, mostly due to my references in the pages), but then things got worse for her, and even though I forgave her for her misdeed on interrupting my [[Sweetheart]] Search, I feel she definitely got what she deserved for her misdeed. Later, I cursed one specific [[Troll]] (I forget who); shortly later, I learn that troll came down with a life-threatening ailment. These Curse and [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha Retraction|Blessing]] [[I am Alive|Powers]] are likely and Sound. I felt like not wearing them. I feel that by turning them Straight would BETTER their chances to getting into Heaven; I'm only doing what I can to encourage the GOOD, Better ways of life. --[[User:ChrisChanSonichu|ChrisChanSonichu]] 06:28, 15 December 2009 (CET)}}

===Normal is relative===
{{Email| From: Johnny Marcus (johnny2day67@yahoo.com)

Hello again Chris, I've got another question for you. I'm curious as to what you were doing in between you getting fired from [[Wendy's]] and the start of your [[Love Quest]] (best of luck to you with that, BTW). You don't really seem to talk too much about that period, so what were you doing aside from attending PVCC? I hope there's some great drawings you did during that time.

Cheers, Johnny}}
{{EmailReply|I did do some drawing. [[9/11]] Happened shortly after being fired. I lived my life as normal back then.}}

===Good/average size breasts===
{{Email| From: [[Wikipedia:Ed Gein|Edward Gein]] (ruaboutasize14@gmail.com)

Hey Chris, long-time fan! [[Issue 10]] is going to be amazing! I'm so glad that you're going to put a bunch of [[Guitar Hero]] stuff in the comics (at least that's what it looks like, you could always surprise me)!

So how come you don't wear your old Ash Ketchum outfit anymore? Have you ever thought of Cosplaying as [[Chris-chan Sonichu]]?

Oh, and what do you find attractive in a woman?

See ya, Ed}}
{{EmailReply|I didn't feel like wearing the outfit much. That is a good idea. Her face, her personality, cleaniness, good/average size breasts, and a slim/average body type.}}

**I'm feeling tired, and my right eye is bothering me; I will resume this mailbag and start the next tomorrow, as well as continue the [[Christmas Story]].

''Chris resumed answering the letters in this mailbag just after midnight on 18 [[December 2009]].''

===There is wishful thinking in Hell as well as on Earth===
{{Email|From Damon [[Wikipedia:The Screwtape Letters|Wormwood]] (w3rk+3hp4+13n+@Gmail.com)

Hey Chris! I'm a big fan of your comics, and have been reading all of your recent mailbags. You seem to be giving out a lot off advice, so I was wondering if you could help me out!

1.) My job is sort of like a "life coach", I have to make the people I've been assigned to see things my way and do the things I need done. You'd think it would be easy considering the cools stuff I'm promoting, but it's actually really hard! Do you have any suggestions as to how to get people to follow your advice or do what you need them to do? I've seen a few of your videos where you ask people to do stuff like take down a web page or something. How did you get them to comply?

2.) My boss, (a [[JERK]] named Mr. Tape) works from the home office and is constantly sending me messages telling me how to do my job. These messages are all very stressful, and he often takes a very derogatory tone! What makes things even worse is that he's my UNCLE! Arguments with family members who are also authority figures are the worst! Have you had many arguments with family members/authority figures, like an uncle or your father? How did you get them to see your side of the story?

I also had a few quick questions about your comics. I hope you don't mind specifying a few things for me!

1.) In the episode about [[4-cent garbage|4-Cent garbage]], what's up with the [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/sonichu/SchuComic9P11.htm big red receptionist guy?] Is he sunburnt or something?

2.) I couldn't help but notice that [[Reginald Sneasel]] and the sunburnt guy at 4-Cent garbage both wear the same kinds of pants! Are they friends?

Thanks a bunch!

Your Pal,

Damon W.}}
{{EmailReply|Okay, first question response: Every Person has their own individual point of view, so no one will see everything as you do, so take that idea out of your head. As for getting them to do what you'd like them to, try to maintain an impression that you are a kind and understanding type of person; be nice to your people and they will be nice to you.

Second: Your Uncle is only pushing down on you, because he may be seeing you not doing a good job from his own point of view, and he cares about you enough to offer, even in a harsh tone, his input on how you can better your job. Again, maintain being nice to your Uncle; take in and fully understand his advice on how you can better your work. Show him that you are doing so, and he may not be so harsh with you. And I did have to go through that with my family; but I just listen, not let them get to me with the loudness and stress. Taking deep breaths and taking it one moment at a time helps too.

Third: The receptionist is a portyal of the Devil, of which is a neutral reference to all the inconsiderate Trolls behind their shenanigans and the Encyclopedia Dramatica in general.

Fourth: The two Do Not Know Each Other, so no they are not friends.

--[[User:ChrisChanSonichu|ChrisChanSonichu]] 06:06, 18 December 2009 (CET)}}

===Chris on murdering women in fiction===
{{Email|Jacob N. (jacob_n333@yahoo.com)

Good day, Chris!

When I was re-reading issues of Sonichu the other day, I suddenly came to realize two questions. One is serious, the other not so much. To begin with the lighter question, pun only slightly intended: I've heard you cite your dog Patti's old doghouse as weighing from five to ten tons. Judging from the photos of [[Patti]]'s doghouse in an earlier issue of Sonichu, it couldn't possibly weigh more than fifty pounds, much less five tons--it's just wood and plastic. I remember that video where you lifted one "fifty-pound" box of soda in each hand (which of course only weigh about ten to twelve pounds)--is the "ten ton doghouse" another joke like that?

After thinking some on the doghouse, I of course soon remembered the dog, and something dawned on me. It seems weird that you memorialize your beloved pet by keeping her as a character in the comic, but that you memorialize the women you've loved by killing them off in ways even more gruesome than in real life (e.g. [[Ivy]] perishing in a terrible elevator accident instead of hanging herself, Panda Halo not merely dying during the brushfires but exploding). Patti is still a character years after her death, but [[Panda Halo]]'s death seemed little more than an excuse to introduce some new characters and Ivy, despite all her buildup in previous issues, was killed off-screen and promptly ignored in favor of the ongoing plot. Why is that, Chris?

From where you readers stand, it seems that you love your pet dog--who was still just a dog, in the end--more than you love real flesh-and-blood women. Clearly that's not the case... so why do you immortalize your loved one's terrible deaths instead of who they were? I'm sure you didn't mean for it to come off that way, but I'm curious why you decided to do that in the first place.

Yours in the [[Cherokee]] nation,
Jacob Nathaniel Lights-in-the-Sky}}
{{EmailReply|To answer your first question, I do not have a full understand on feeling the weight of something versus their actual weight, so those numbers were originally only Estimates. The women characters who in real life were my girlfriends before their deaths. It was my mistake of putting in to-be girlfriends when they would see their own real-life deaths prematurely. I should have been in full confidence of them being my girlfriend CLOSE in real life than solely over the internet. Patti was my dog FOR REAL, and we actually had the caring master/dog relationship, so she WOULD be ongoing, because she WAS that close to me; NEVER over the internet.

If any of the women I had put into the books actually were my girlfriends Offline and Close in Real Life, then they WOULD be more likely to be ongoing in the series.

--[[User:ChrisChanSonichu|ChrisChanSonichu]] 06:06, 18 December 2009 (CET)}}

===Chris on the homeless===
{{Email|From: Amanda Brown (ultimatefan88@gmail.com)

Chris,

Glad you've been keeping busy with so many updates! As a fan it's so great having new Sonichu stuff to read every day.

I was reading through the Sonichu & [[Rosechu]] Christmas story and was wondering why there are homeless people in [[CWCville]]? I thought CWCville was like your imaginary perfect city where the only problems were like giant robot attacks and stuff.

Have fun,
Amanda}}
{{EmailReply|A city is still a city, all problems included. I took it to responsibility to make sure the homeless were happy too by giving them not only Soup Kitchens, but Hotels WITH those Soup Kitchens. If every city adopted the ideal and put their funds into the Soup Hotels (as I call them), then we would be seeing less homeless in the streets and the homeless would feel more happy and comfortable.

Also, the people would need places to stay after such incredible attacks, and that's where the Soup Hotels would come in even better, and the already homeless people would be able to help rebuild the buildings for their neighbors. It's a kind and generous thought for society.

--[[User:ChrisChanSonichu|ChrisChanSonichu]] 06:06, 18 December 2009 (CET)}}

===Time paradox===
{{Email|From: Seth Sethson <totallyfine2@gmail.com>
Chris, while I am a fan of your comic and I appreciate how you are attempting to tie up the loose ends so you can let the story be about Sonichu, I feel that I must point out a massive plothole.

In the story, you have sent [[Magi-chan]] to the future to take the crates containing enough of the anti-gay gene to cure the world back into the present and use them.

This creates a time paradox. If all [[homo]]sexuality was cured in the present, there would not be a need for the cure in the present. Necessity is the mother of invention, so the cure would never be invented because nobody needed it.

I won't bore you further but I'll just point out that this is impossible and it makes you look incredibly lazy.}}
{{EmailReply|Point taken. But there WOULD be an alternate Dimension where THAT future STILL takes place indefinitely, and so no time paradox is in jeopardy. Like similarly, there is the Dimension of the future where the Vaccine is distributed like I'm portraying it, and so our present would sync-up with THAT Dimension that would be our future.}}

===At normal best===
{{Email|From: Lynx Robinson <lynxrob@yahoo.com>
Hey Chris.

You always say you take it one moment at a time. Is that because it is all your brain can handle?}}
{{EmailReply|That is actually how ALL PEOPLE'S Brains can handle in General and at Normal Best.}}

===Chris the forgiver of brothers===
{{Email|From: Jessica Hughes <jessiebaby91234@yahoo.com>
Hello Christian!

This is Jessie Hughes, the preteen with the dirty, slanderous troll brother, Nathan! He told me he gave you a piece of his mind. I looked at the e-mail from the Rejected Mailbag, and I was so ticked off at him! I got my own e-mail so I could write to my hero, Christian Weston Chandler!

I have a few questions for you.

1) My brother and I are currently not speaking because of what he said to you.. What do you suggest I do? Should I stop talking to his meanie butt, or should we become loving siblings again?

2) Would you disown Sonichu if he became a homo? I would totally disown my son if he was gay, because this kid in my class, [[Wikipedia:E.O._Green_School_shooting|Larry King]] (not the old fart on TV), is gay and we throw rocks at him during recess, and I don't want my kid to be like him.

3) I'm truly very sorry about Nathan's comments against you. He's been a little angry lately because he's been having some "accidents" if you know what I mean, and that's why he FALSELY accused you of doing the same.

Jessica

P.S. I LOVE the comics, hun!}}
{{EmailReply|You should forgive and forget; what is done is done. All you can do is let him know how you feel about what he did and move on. If you still love and care for your brother like you always did, then don't fret about this one thing which is miniscule in comparison to (if) anything bad he may have done to you. Sonichu is Straight, and would Never turn homo. If I had a child who'd turn homo, I'd forgive her/him and not disown. I forgive your brother, thank you. :)

--[[User:ChrisChanSonichu|ChrisChanSonichu]] 06:06, 18 December 2009 (CET)}}

===International economics===
{{Email|From: [[Wikipedia:Castlevania|Maria Renard]] <mariarenard@hotmail.co.uk>
Hello Christian.

I just watched your latest [[Youtube]] video, and I'd like to ask, why would you need donations from Europeans such as myself when you get $800 American Dollars from taxpayers every month? Is that not enough for you?}}
{{EmailReply|Most of that money goes to my father, plus no it is not. Currently, the Euro is greater than the American Dollar, which I feel is sad.}}

===In which Chris lies about parody again===
{{Email|From: kittenhearts86@aol.com
Dear Chris,

Have you ever considered doing a comic that doesn't rely on stealing ideas from other people (like how Sonichu steals from [[Sonic]] and Pikachu)? Theft is a sin after all.}}
{{EmailReply|It is called a Parody; NOT THEFT.}}

===He might as well be talking about how to pilot the space shuttle===
{{Email|From: mmmmgotohim@aol.com

My girlfriend is having a birthday party in a few days. She says she wants me to kiss her on her lips but I'm a little scared. What's it like kissing a girl on the lips?}}
{{EmailReply|It is magical and delightful. Don't be scared; it is sweet and melting like ice cream or chocolate.}}

==Autism Mailbag==
===In which Chris pretends to care===
{{Email|From: [[Vivian Gee|Hamsty the Hamster]] <hamstythehamster@gmail.com>
I hope you realize you are turning into a monster. Read this: http://www.salon.com/mwt/feature/2009/03/26/bauer_autism/index.html

Look Chris, you were "successful" in high school with your "honor roll". What have you done since then? Face it, you should just seek help before you turn into a monster.}}
{{EmailReply|I will keep your comment in mind, thank you.}}

{{Mailbag}}

Talk:Greene County Conspiracy

2010-05-09T15:20:30Z

Boop: /* The radio call in contest */

{{Not A Forum}}

Starting transcription [[User:Urist|Urist]] 04:55, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

A video was released earlier by solidsnakeproductions giving a gay craigslist user looking for good times directions to Chris' house...could this be why he made this video? [[User:LouisLash|LouisLash]] 2:14, 9 May 2010 (UTC)
*Doubtful. By the sounds of it, Chris won tickets for some sporting event, no one wanted to go with his smelly ass and when he did go, he was reminded he was a [[Virgin with rage]] by the lovey-dovey couple beside him. Thus, he decided to go after others, blaming ''two fucking counties'' for playing Kick the Autistic!--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 05:17, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

==Name Change==
I know, it just got put up, but this page needs a better name. I vote for either "Chris Whines The Blues" or "The Greene County Conspiracy"--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 05:09, 9 May 2010 (UTC)
*Moving it here, so it can be seen.--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 05:15, 9 May 2010 (UTC)
*I like "The Greene County Conspiracy". -[[User:Ezra Mason|Ezra Mason]] 05:39, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

What's the "100 2178" supposed to mean--is it just random gibberish for blank videos or is there some meaning to it?--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 06:31, 9 May 2010 (UTC)
*No, that's just the file number Chris uploaded this to.--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 06:33, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

Who wants to note all the aesthetic similarities to [[Song of Christian]]? We could call it Song of Christian II : Electric Boogaloo. [[User:TheBrownSonichu|TheBrownSonichu]] 07:34, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

Why don't we just call it 8 May 2010? --[[User:Aldrasio|Aldrasio]] 10:52, 9 May 2010 (UTC)
:8 May 2010 is the proper thing to call this. That said, if we're gonna give it a custom title, I would suggest "Chris looks back".

==Cry some more, Chris==
Hahahahahaha! His tears taste magnificent! Greatest CWC video in a while. We're fucking breaking him. [[User:CrookedSmirk|CrookedSmirk]] 05:30, 9 May 2010 (UTC)
*"We" didn't do shit. Chris did this to himself, yet again proving that no one trolls Chris better than Chris. [[User:Brofose|Brofose]] 07:46 9 May 2010 (UTC)

==Pertinence==
This is worth mentioning in so many other articles. Namely, the articles on [[reality]] and his [[ego]] come to mind. It's a conspiracy, folks! -[[User:Ezra Mason|Ezra Mason]] 05:39, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

== Chris's Shirt. ==

Hey everyone. I make a crappy smalltime riffing video series for fun, and I decided to ''possibly'' riff this video. I typically brighten videos up when I riff them if they're retardedly dark, and I noticed no one had an idea of what shirt he's wearing, so I took a screencap of my best effort to brighten Chris's day.

http://imgur.com/ygTLM.jpg

It appears to be a new shirt, either a tank top or a tee with the sleeves rolled up, with what I ''believe'' to be the Hogwarts shield on it. Chances are I'm wrong on that, though.

Also, I've noticed he's lost ''alot'' of hair. That may be the reason why he's obstructing himself.

I hope it helps! --[[User:ToyoWolf|Kimo]] 05:45, 9 May 2010 (UTC)
* First of all, it looks like the shirt's an orange ''Sonic Heroes'' t-shirt. The little emblem by his left manboob looks like the ''Sonic Heroes'' logo. Second of all, holy shit, where did his hair go?! I know he had more than that when he did that video gloating over removing that piece!--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 05:48, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

* That frame exaggerates the state of his hair. The camera isn't looking straight at him like it is in the beginning, and the aspect ratio hasn't been enforced. Here's another frame: http://i.imgur.com/Ic9XE.jpg --[[User:Lurker|Lurker]] 06:20, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

* Ah, crap, I forgot I changed the ratio. Sorry about that x3

Yes, this one is much better. I can tell there is a character in that emblem on his shirt, but I'm not sure who it is... It looks like either Dee Dee from Dexter's Lab or XJ9 from My Life As A Teenage Robot to me. It also looks like there's a...rocketship? I believe? --[[User:ToyoWolf|Kimo]] 06:26, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

Almost thought it was the shirt from "10 September 2009" since the first person mentioned rolling up the sleeves, until I saw the emblem. --[[User:16BitAlex|16BitAlex]] 07:16, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

* Isn't this the "Jerkop" shirt he used to wear during the Ivy saga? It looks orange in this video and the "Jerkop" one is bright yellow, but seeing how bad the quality is... --[[User:Goronian|Goronian]] 12:28, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

==The Conspiracy==
I guess I misunderstood the video, because I thought Chris was whining that he would have had a better life in Chesterfield county, but the Chandlers got stuck in Greene county because they couldn't sell the house they are currently living in. Could somebody help a poor slow-in-the-mind like me figure this out? Thanks in advance (please type slowly). [[User:Squirrelbait|Squirrelbait]] 06:17, 9 May 2010 (UTC)
*Assuming what Chris is telling us is true, I reckon it goes like this. For about the latter five years of the 90s, 14 Branchland Court in Ruckersville was empty while the Chandlers lived in Richmond and Chris was in high school. If they'd successfully sold 14 Branchland Court, they would have had the money to buy a permanent place in the Richmond area. Since they couldn't sell it, it wasn't cost-effective to keep renting homes in Richmond while also paying property taxes on the Ruckersville house and letting it fall into even worse disrepair. Thus, the move back to Ruckersville after Chris graduated high school. Which more or less rings true to me, altogether. (The part about realtors conspiring with the school district...well, yeah.) Anyway, I updated a couple of the articles on Chris's homes with this data, I think I hit the main ones that needed it. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 06:26, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

(1) Chris attends elementary school in Greene County, where sitting on the principal's lap gives him homophobia and a group of teachers abuses him by holding him down and recording his screams and cries. The school board wants him institutionalized so his family moves to Chesterfield County, but keep their house in Greene County.
(2) Chris goes to school in Chesterfield County, where he Comes Out of His Autistic Shell, makes lots of Gal-Pals, and creates Sonichu.
(3) Chris graduates and moves back to Greene County, away from all of his Gal-Pals, and begins his decline. PVCC is in Greene County. If his family had been able to sell their house (it sounds like they must not have had any interest in selling their house) then they would still live in Chesterfield County. You can see pictures of the move in A Week In The Life of Christian Weston Chandler, which is about his High School graduation [[User:Urist|Urist]] 06:25, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

Simple answer: Chris is blaming everyone else for his problems. How do you not get how this works? [[User:BrokenDead89|BrokenDead89]] 06:30, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

tl;dr, everything bad in Chris's life is the fault of <s>Adam Stackhouse</s> <s>Joshua Martinez</s> <s>Jerkops</s> <s>Clyde Cash</s> <s>THE IMPOSTOR</s> <s>That Damn ED Page</s> <s>The Cwcki</s> <s>Michael Snyder</s> <s>Ms. Roach the Babysitter</s> <s>Chris's principal</s> The Greene County School Board of the early 1990s. [[User:Hurrrr2|Hurrrr2]] 06:32, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

Thanks, guys, it's making sense now (as much as anything Chris-related can). I think the article on this video has the Greene and Chesterfield houses mixed up, which derailed me. [[User:Squirrelbait|Squirrelbait]] 06:34, 9 May 2010 (UTC)
*You're right, the summary had that mixed up. Good catch. Fixed that and added a link. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 06:41, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

*Wait, I'm confused now. Was Greene County involved with the two bugs in his PS3? I guess that makes since, because county officials would have the access. --[[User:TubularMonkey|TubularMonkey]] 09:27, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

==The end of the Y.A.S.G. as we know it==

The line regarding his attempt to find someone in his congregation to with him at the "Extreme Sports" show is revealing. Not only he used Rocky to find friends to go with him, none of them called him back. This is, for me, a proof that we can move the infamous "Young Adult Social Group" in the list of people who doesn't love Chris. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 07:39, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

*To that end, I've added a dramatic visual recreation of the event. --[[User:TubularMonkey|TubularMonkey]] 09:00, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

==Holy shit, guys==

Inb4 not a forum, I just want to say that I can't fucking believe that anyone would be so idiotic. I've followed this guy for months now, but fucking hell, even the stupidest people I know have the intelligence not to blame their elementary school for people not liking them, and many of the people I know are going to flunk out of high school. Holy fucking shit. [[User:Thelieisacake|Thelieisacake]] 10:36, 9 May 2010 (UTC)
:We've been following him for years; this is childs' play. I don't know about you guys, but "You're all just immature, naive, condescending, soulless monsters." fits me to the letter --[[User:Robotnik|Robotnik]] 10:50, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

== The radio call in contest ==

Would it be possible to look into 95.1's archives to find a recording of Chris winning? --[[User:Espanolic|Espanolic]] 12:11, 9 May 2010 (UTC)
*Heh, I just looked up the radio station on google to try to do this, and the tag is "Z95 Today's hits and yesterday's favorites, music for women." P.S. I'm looking now. [[User:Thelieisacake|Thelieisacake]] 12:14, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

Talk:Greene County Conspiracy

2010-05-09T15:19:40Z

Boop: /* The radio call in contest */

Talk:Ricardo Weston Chandler

2010-05-06T20:24:25Z

Boop:

==To do==
In a way, this is a "Chris and the Spanish language" article, but I think it's alright to do it for "Ricardo" since it's "Ricardo."

Essentially, let's try and document all of Chris's crimes against the Spanish language, "Ricardo's" grasp of the language, his Spanish language related stuff, etc. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 13:23, 29 May 2009 (CEST)

:There's a ton of shit on his "El PokeSite", but the site's down. I'll see if I can find a mirror of the pre-hacked site. If I do, I'll be more than glad to host it. [[User:Fat Nigger|Fat Nigger]] 09:05, 30 May 2009 (CEST)

:Oh god, I just remembered those fake pokemon he made that were basically walking sombreros. Once the page develops more, I'll try and find a place for them. [[User:FalseSwipe|FalseSwipe]] 01:22, 2 June 2009 (CEST)

"If it were translated, his name would be "Cristiano", like Portuguese soccer star Cristiano Ronaldo". No, it would be the PORTUGUESE translation (Portuguese is the official language of Portugal and Brazil). Cristian or Cristóbal would be the correct translation. --[[User:Bystander|Bystander]] 00:25, 5 August 2009 (CEST)
: you got it right, the correct translation of his full name would be Cristóbal Cristian Weston Velero, altough translating last names is faggotry.--[[User:Tutatis|Tutatis]] 02:55, 21 October 2009 (CEST)

:People need candles in Spain too ya damn niggo. [[User:OrgenNoon|OrgenNoon]] 02:31, 16 November 2009 (CET)

He has a whole [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/CWC_Speaks article] on the CWCipedia describing how "fluent" he is. I'll try to incorporate later, but if someone else wants to give it a shot go ahead. - [[User:Boop|Boop]] 20:24, 6 May 2010 (UTC)

Talk:Ricardo Weston Chandler

2010-05-06T19:52:29Z

Boop:

==To do==
In a way, this is a "Chris and the Spanish language" article, but I think it's alright to do it for "Ricardo" since it's "Ricardo."

Essentially, let's try and document all of Chris's crimes against the Spanish language, "Ricardo's" grasp of the language, his Spanish language related stuff, etc. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 13:23, 29 May 2009 (CEST)

:There's a ton of shit on his "El PokeSite", but the site's down. I'll see if I can find a mirror of the pre-hacked site. If I do, I'll be more than glad to host it. [[User:Fat Nigger|Fat Nigger]] 09:05, 30 May 2009 (CEST)

:Oh god, I just remembered those fake pokemon he made that were basically walking sombreros. Once the page develops more, I'll try and find a place for them. [[User:FalseSwipe|FalseSwipe]] 01:22, 2 June 2009 (CEST)

"If it were translated, his name would be "Cristiano", like Portuguese soccer star Cristiano Ronaldo". No, it would be the PORTUGUESE translation (Portuguese is the official language of Portugal and Brazil). Cristian or Cristóbal would be the correct translation. --[[User:Bystander|Bystander]] 00:25, 5 August 2009 (CEST)
: you got it right, the correct translation of his full name would be Cristóbal Cristian Weston Velero, altough translating last names is faggotry.--[[User:Tutatis|Tutatis]] 02:55, 21 October 2009 (CEST)

:People need candles in Spain too ya damn niggo. [[User:OrgenNoon|OrgenNoon]] 02:31, 16 November 2009 (CET)

: He has a whole [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/CWC_Speaks article] on the CWCipedia describing how "fluent" he is. I'll try to incorporate later, but if someone else wants to give it a shot go ahead. - [[User:Boop|Boop]] 19:52, 6 May 2010 (UTC)

Talk:Ricardo Weston Chandler

2010-05-06T19:52:17Z

Boop:

==To do==
In a way, this is a "Chris and the Spanish language" article, but I think it's alright to do it for "Ricardo" since it's "Ricardo."

Essentially, let's try and document all of Chris's crimes against the Spanish language, "Ricardo's" grasp of the language, his Spanish language related stuff, etc. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 13:23, 29 May 2009 (CEST)

:There's a ton of shit on his "El PokeSite", but the site's down. I'll see if I can find a mirror of the pre-hacked site. If I do, I'll be more than glad to host it. [[User:Fat Nigger|Fat Nigger]] 09:05, 30 May 2009 (CEST)

:Oh god, I just remembered those fake pokemon he made that were basically walking sombreros. Once the page develops more, I'll try and find a place for them. [[User:FalseSwipe|FalseSwipe]] 01:22, 2 June 2009 (CEST)

"If it were translated, his name would be "Cristiano", like Portuguese soccer star Cristiano Ronaldo". No, it would be the PORTUGUESE translation (Portuguese is the official language of Portugal and Brazil). Cristian or Cristóbal would be the correct translation. --[[User:Bystander|Bystander]] 00:25, 5 August 2009 (CEST)
: you got it right, the correct translation of his full name would be Cristóbal Cristian Weston Velero, altough translating last names is faggotry.--[[User:Tutatis|Tutatis]] 02:55, 21 October 2009 (CEST)

:People need candles in Spain too ya damn niggo. [[User:OrgenNoon|OrgenNoon]] 02:31, 16 November 2009 (CET)

: He has a whole [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/CWC_Speaks article] on the CWCipedia describing how "fluent" he is. I'll try to incorporate later, but if someone else wants to give it a shot go ahead.

Talk:CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation

2010-04-26T02:02:12Z

Boop: /* Sonic vs Sonichu board game */

What is this, I don't even? Business people? God damn it, I hope he knows that if he tries to sell this in any way shape or form Sega and Nintendo will LITERALLY tear him a new asshole.--[[User:Sonichuistehcool|Sonichuistehcool]] 03:22, 24 November 2009 (CET)

I wonder what inspired him to do this? What does he expect to happen? Who is this for? What is going on aaahhhhrghhhaha my brain! [[User:CWCattack|CWCattack]] 03:52, 24 November 2009 (CET)

*His copyright papers he got from the Library of Congress or whatever. That's what set this off. He probably has it in his head that 'copyright' automatically translates into success and marketability. [[User:Glorious Tentacularity|Glorious Tentacularity]] 02:13, 25 November 2009 (CET)
*This reminds me of those investor videos, like "HELLO AMERICAN INVESTOR!" I haven't had a chance to watch the video (just got back from work) but this reminds of old school Chris. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 04:11, 24 November 2009 (CET)
* From CWCipedia: ist1 = I have been busy looking up numbers to get in touch with the people of the videogame, toy, video, and comic industries to make the merchandise come to fruition. Today, I have created and am uploading 4 Videos introducing Sonichu to those people. Firstly, a Personal Presentation, followed by the Powerpoint Presentation. After each fully uploaded video, I will be adding them to the [[Sonichu Presentations]] page. Expect all the videos uploaded before midnight tonight and a new page or two tomorrow. Stay Safe --[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/User:ChrisChanSonichu ChrisChanSonichu] 03:23, 24 November 2009
(CET) --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 04:02, 24 November 2009 (CET)

His boobs.. they're larger than usual. Wearing his bra perhaps.. --[[User:Dave|Dave]]

Even for Chris, the sheer amount of living-in-the-past on display is baffling. [[User:Llort|Llort]] 03:56, 24 November 2009 (CET)

Is there anyone who noticed the extra-long sleeves added to the clown shirt? Do this is due to some autistic hyper-sensibility or the shirt is too worn out? [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 06:41, 24 November 2009 (CET)

==Transcript==

If anyone wants to get started on the transcript, to avoid conflicts while cutting down effort, please work on the first 2:40 of the video. I'm working on the latter 2:41. --[[User:Tristran|Tristran]] 03:29, 24 November 2009 (CET)

* I can do the first 2:40. (edit: done) [[User:Alteceastlansing|Alteceastlansing]] 03:39, 24 November 2009 (CET)

** Between that ''horrible'' music and the incessant, incoherent babbling, he's really asking for someone to drive a railroad spike through his fucking skull. --[[User:Tristran|Tristran]] 04:21, 24 November 2009 (CET)

==Transcript, Part 2==

Same deal. I'll do the last 4:06, and I hope someone can pick up the other 4:05 of it. --[[User:Tristran|Tristran]] 04:34, 24 November 2009 (CET)
* Sure, can do. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 04:45, 24 November 2009 (CET)

==Lol, cell phone==
Why does this idiot keep dropping his personal information? [[User:Orly444|Orly444]] 04:05, 24 November 2009 (CET)
*Spoiler: Chris realizes that the Internet already knows his personal contact info, so no sense in hiding it. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 04:11, 24 November 2009 (CET)
**Regardless, don't you think that he'd learn his lesson by now? [[User:Orly444|Orly444]] 06:18, 24 November 2009 (CET)
Hi, Billy Mays here with Sonichu, The raddest, most zapinest original creation by Christian Weston chandler... --[[User:Dave|Dave]]

==Other==
Oh lawd, call in the businessmen. --[[User:Greatestenemy32|Greatestenemy32]]

I believe that this is NOT a new video, rather a throwback vid from the Miamoto sags. Recall if you will Chris saying that he could not raise the funds and sent a CD with a presentation and power point instead? This must be that video. [[User:Kast Iron|Kast Iron]] 09:30, 24 November 2009 (CET)
*Nice try, but he mentions the copyright paperwork which he only got two weeks ago, not to mention he mentions CWCipedia which did not exist until June 2009. Though he is still using the original PowerPoint dated January, as he probably didn't feel compelled to update it. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 03:52, 25 November 2009 (CET)

I don't think he had that flat screen tv back then --[[User:Greatestenemy32|Greatestenemy32]]

Using his PS3 or whatever it is for background music is a recent trait. Also he has his proud little copyright papers. [[User:Glorious Tentacularity|Glorious Tentacularity]] 02:06, 25 November 2009 (CET)

==Chris's version of the formal wear Sonichu and Rosechu==
I swear to God, it's on the CWCki somewhere, unlinked, or maybe it's even on CWCkipedia. In any case, FIND IT and link it here. Same with all the other fan art here.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 09:46, 24 November 2009 (CET)

==About the Power point presentations==
Should it be noted how they fucked up to the point where youtube couldn't process them and deleted the vids? I think Chris is perhaps too stupid to check that his videos work properly(Letting the frame skipping ones pass), it may take him a while for him to figure out they didn't upload. --[[User:Dave|Dave]] 16:58, 24 November 2009 (CET)
:Doubtful. I wouldn't put it past him to have tried to upload the actual PowerPoint '''file''' and think that it could display on YT OK. Both botched up so that's the more likely thing. [[User:Allen Longbolt|Allen Longbolt]] 00:04, 25 November 2009 (CET)
*That one video that had no sound is more or less proof that Chris really doesn't check to see if his videos work. I'm inclined to agree with Allen Longbolt that Chris probably tried to upload a .ppt file. If we're lucky, maybe Chris will do a video presentation of his slideshow, with commentary and stuff. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 00:38, 25 November 2009 (CET)
:*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aitXkufbKR4 I CALLED IT!]. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 01:14, 25 November 2009 (CET)

== Subliminal messages? ==

There are ''clearly'' some inserted flickery frames of weirdness in some of these videos. Subliminal messages, or just shitty editing or not-so-stellar video processing, courtesy of PSTriple? I'm leaning on the latter. Anyway, someone should probably look at this stuff frame-by-frame - I have sort of sore eyes right now... --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' ([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]]) 20:15, 24 November 2009 (CET)

== oh god unoriginality strikes again ==

Does anyone else see the implications of this part:

"I wanted to use Sonic the Hedgehog and Pikachu on the cover of my CD, but they're both copyrighted characters, and previously-copyrighted characters were not allowed. '''So, uh, after lunch, uh, during that same day, in da Manchester High School with my teacher Miss Naelie Chalifoux, thank'a very much, I have...—it just dawned upon me''', with, uh, merging together, in combination of the two, and then Sonichu was born."

as being that Chris PROBABLY DIDN'T EVEN THINK UP GODDAMN SONICHU HIMSELF? It sounds like he cried tard tears over not being able to use his favourite cartoons so his teacher suggested he merge the two into a new character. I mean, it's not like Sonichu had a scrap of credibility as an original character to begin with, but the one aspect he had claim to and probably wasn't even his idea. Good lord. - [[User:Wonder Ben|Wonder Ben]] 03:35, 25 November 2009 (CET)

* No. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 03:48, 25 November 2009 (CET)

* All Chris is saying is that that's who his teacher was for that class. Nothing more. [[User:Llort|Llort]] 03:59, 25 November 2009 (CET)

==Sonic vs Sonichu board game==

Turns out it was mentioned in the "Meet Sonichu" article in the PVCC student paper... in 2004.

[[:Image:391-SchuPVCCArticle.jpg]]

* I am desperately curious about the contents of that board game...has it been mentioned anywhere else? - [[User:Boop|Boop]] 02:02, 26 April 2010 (UTC)

Talk:For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV

2010-04-26T00:48:30Z

Boop: /* Bra size */

So... where's the video?--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 04:48, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
*It's the video of the now. I'm no good with the new fangled video template, so you guys can sort it out. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 04:49, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
:*I see it an OH I AM SO FUCKING '''TRANSCRIBING DIS BITCH!!!'''--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 04:50, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
:A few things we need to do from what I can tell.
::1. <s>Put up a fucking warning label on this bitch (came damn close to vomiting)</s>
::2. <s>Add the new shirt to Chris and Fashion</s> --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 05:03, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
*Completely agreed about the warning. This is the most disturbing thing I've seen in a long time (and I just finished EVA two days ago).--[[User:AdderCress|AdderCress]] 05:28, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
:* Done. -- [[User:Revolver Octopus|Revolver Octopus]] 05:46, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
==Transcribing==

I will assist Beat with transcribing, if he needs my help. Other projects will have to wait. [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 05:05, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
:First half done. My first watchthrough is the one I transcribe on, something tells me this won't end well.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 05:19, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
::* That's what I do too. It helps I think, but it also means you get rude surprises. Like the cyber in Mumble 3. -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 05:34, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
::WHAT THE FUCK SHIT DAMN I HATE YOU ALL--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 05:22, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
:::* Oh my God. I don't know if I want to know now, if it can shake the almighty Beat. -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 05:34, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
::::*Ron you transcribed the Mumbles so you can probably take this. However, I wouldn't push yourself if your heart level is below 40% --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 05:36, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
::::*Beat- EJECT! EJECT! EJECT! -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 05:38, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
:::::* IT IS DONE. That could have been a lot worse.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 05:40, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
::::::* You deserve a fucking medal for that one, man. --[[User:HatMcCullough|HatMcCullough]] 05:43, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
:::::::*Admittedly I skimmed over the details of his tongue movements. If somebody wants to provide a more in-depth explanation, I suggest you seek counseling immediately.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 05:44, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
::::::::*Beat, you are THE MAN! Yes, you deserve a bloody medal. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 05:58, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
::::::::*Sometimes I am annoyed I never get to transcribe anything new because of my timezone. Sometimes I am very, very glad. Still, I'll touch it up tonight, no matter what the tiny whisper that was my sanity begs me to avoid. -[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 06:05, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
::::::::*Ronichu's work ethic never ceases to amaze. I only wish He did not have to suffer so much for it.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 06:11, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
:::::::::* Truly a god among men. I take my hat off to you.--[[User:YawningSquirtleRedux|YawningSquirtleRedux]] 08:57, 22 April 2010 (UTC)

== Problem with brackets? ==

When I edited this article, the brackets were removed from two words (such as [[glasses]] or [[CWCki]]) during both of the edits. The hell? --'''[[User:Lime|L]][[User_talk:Lime|i]][[Special:Contributions/Lime|m]][[nudes|e]]''' [[Image:Madotsuki.png]] 15:31, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
:* CWCki was mentioned, but not bracketed, in the intro at the time. I couldn't find a logical explanation for the glasses bracket, though. Either the Wiki glitched or it was ninjas. --[[User:Jewlay|Jewlay]] 19:08, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
::* I think it might've been ninjas. The sneaky bastards. --'''[[User:Lime|L]][[User_talk:Lime|i]][[Special:Contributions/Lime|m]][[nudes|e]]''' [[Image:Madotsuki.png]] 19:28, 22 April 2010 (UTC)

== Date ==

Da Update states this video was leaked on the 21st, this article states the 22nd. The CWCVilleLibrary account has the upload date as the 21st. I r confuse. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 20:43, 22 April 2010 (UTC)

==No shit is too minor ==

We need to identify what his ringtone is. --[[User:Exemplary|Exemplary]] 23:12, 22 April 2010 (UTC)
* This is probably obvious, but I figured it's worth mentioning that I'm pretty sure it's from a Sonic game. --[[User:ThatMan|ThatMan]] 00:44, 23 April 2010 (UTC)
** Haven't played a Sonic game in years, but it kind of sounds like Casino Night Zone.--[[User:AdderCress|AdderCress]] 07:14, 23 April 2010 (UTC)

==Bra size==
Just to put on record, 42 is his band size, not his cup size, so it's hard to say how big his manboobs are. ...but they're bigger than mine, and I'm an A cup. [[User:BubblegumPinkButler|BubblegumPinkButler]] 02:24, 23 April 2010 (UTC)
* Well, using the page image and this chart[http://lingerie.lovetoknow.com/Bra_Size_Chart] as references, I'd guess he's a C. Maybe a D, if the sports bra is squishing his boobs. [[User:Schismtracer|Schismtracer]] 02:59, 23 April 2010 (UTC)
* During the muscle bra photo set back in October, Chris mentioned his size to be 43...is this an accurate size, or a misconception by Chris? And now it's a 42. Is this evidence that he's actually lost a little weight? Not a huge deal, but again, no shit is too minor.--[[User:AdderCress|AdderCress]] 06:25, 23 April 2010 (UTC)
** He measured 43 inches in October, but he purchased size 42 bras. They only come in even-numbered sizes, and I'm sure he choose the smaller size for better holding power. (As for his weight, he looks like he's packed on a few more pounds, not lost some.) Did anyone else notice the weird gleam of pride in his eyes when he said he has a 42 bust? Jesus titty-fucking christ. [[User:Squirrelbait|Squirrelbait]] 08:02, 23 April 2010 (UTC)
***Not knowing much about bra sizes myself, I have to ask. How big is a C or D cup? --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 21:01, 23 April 2010 (UTC)
:::* It's all relative, really, depending on the size of the torso they're attached to. If the circumference of the torso at the nipples is three inches greater than the circumference just below the breasts, that's a C cup. D cup is four inches difference. So on a woman who's in good shape, a D cup approaches porn star proportions, but Chris's floppers could easily be D-sized because he's so fucking fat. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 21:45, 23 April 2010 (UTC)
* Bigger than mine too, I was coming here to bitch about that...considering that it's a sports bra, it's possible that he's referring to the sizes on the sports bra packages rather than actual bust measurement. I have a hard time imagining that he'd do all this[http://www.ehow.com/how_2311500_measure-bust-size-sports-bra.html] to get an accurate measurement. I'm horribly unfamiliar with exactly how sports bras are sized, but if he's really got a 43" bust, then he might be a DD[http://www.enell.com/size_and_measurement_chart.php]. - [[User:Boop|Boop]] 00:48, 26 April 2010 (UTC)

Talk:The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special

2010-04-21T22:17:47Z

Boop:

Adding a summary or just a section for important shit we learned might be useful? - [[User:Boop|Boop]] 22:17, 21 April 2010 (UTC)

I just want to know is this what he gave them for their 24th wedding anniversary? I mean despite having 350$ of welfare he couldn't put 50$ a side to buy a gift for his parents own anniversary?[[User:Shawths|Shawths]]

If Chris spent money on them, then that would be 50$ he couldn't spend on video games. Plus, he seems to like picking the cheapest option possible(the attraction sign was described as "inexpensive" in his ED edits).--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 00:35, 15 February 2010 (UTC)

I'm just astounded by how little he cares for his parents. [[User:Shawths|Shawths]]

== Chris and music? ==

The observation's been made before that Chris is tone-deaf but I think this video offers definite proof that it's more than just a really shitty singing voice. At about 6:50 into the father video, he starts playing his in-game composition of the Sonic the Hedgehog theme song (as a gift for his parents). Besides being absolutely atempo, it does not fit any sonic leitmotif I can remember - the closest it comes to is to the invincibility music in the old games (I'm a big fat nerd, shut up) but most of the note changes that are any less than maybe two whole steps he reproduces as the same as the previous note - like the seven identical notes at the end.

Err, mostly this was just an excuse to flex music nuts but if anyone's interested, there's a poorly-phrased explanation of why he can be clinically called tone-deaf.[[User:Cutelittlerosey|Cutelittlerosey]] 12:48, 19 March 2010 (EST)

Talk:So Need a Cute Girl

2010-04-21T19:44:49Z

Boop:

I know it sounds odd to say this, but this is probably Chris singing at his best. The fucker can't carry a tune whatsoever, and his singing still sounds like a rusty nail on a piece of glass, but it's still more tolerable than [[A-U-T-I-S-M]] or some of that other shit. Also just wondering if Chris thinks he can actually sing, like how he thinks he's handsome and not fat.--[[User:Howsyourham|Howsyourham]] 04:24, 16 July 2009 (CEST)

...does Chris know that Santa doesn't exist? - [[User:Boop|Boop]] 19:44, 21 April 2010 (UTC)

File talk:ShecameforCWC (200803).JPG

2010-04-19T12:47:05Z

Boop:

I think maybe this warrants its own article. I mean, there's been so much controversy over this image and it's like Chris's masterwork, except it captures everything wrong with Chris - his lack of art skills, his unfamiliarity with the female anatomy, the fact he was creepy as fuck to Megan, his misogyny (it looks like Chris started from the vagina, went to breasts, and is like "Oh, I need a face"), the fact he thought uploading this to ED would help him... I can go on.

Normally I wouldn't consider making an article about an individual piece of work Chris has made but this one is rather exceptional if you think about it. Thoughts? --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 02:43, 10 June 2009 (CEST)
* yeah, there's just so much to this picture, it deserves its own page. --[[User:Cogsdev|cogsdev/vedsgoc]] 02:50, 10 June 2009 (CEST)

* Sure thing, Daddy. This isn't just some scrapbook image, uploading it had a major impact on his life, and the repercussions are still being felt to this day. --[[User:Delabonte|Delabonte]] 04:50, 10 June 2009 (CEST)

Aw, Megan's va-jay-jay has a little Hitler mustache. That's cute. [[User:Sauerkraut131|Sauerkraut131]] 03:07, 10 June 2009 (CEST)

The thumbs up he's giving makes me crack up everytime.--[[User:ZenRgy|ZenRgy]] 05:03, 10 June 2009 (CEST)

Personally, I'm fond of the speed lines. Looks dangerous to me; I wouldn't let that shit near my vajingo. - [[User:Boop|Boop]] 12:47, 19 April 2010 (UTC)

Talk:CWC's Pokésite 2

2010-04-18T21:47:53Z

Boop: Created page with 'Can anyone with good eyes see what the Spanish Pokemon sign says for me? Curious if it's at all decent. - ~~~~'

Can anyone with good eyes see what the Spanish Pokemon sign says for me? Curious if it's at all decent. - [[User:Boop|Boop]] 21:47, 18 April 2010 (UTC)

Talk:Christian Weston Chandler

2010-04-18T05:29:56Z

Boop:

...Okay, is it just me, or does Chrissy look drastically different when he's wearing his glasses compared to when he's not? Like, I almost can't believe it's the same person. I mean, I can, since no one else could possibly be that much of a fucktard, but he just looks really different. Or am I imagining it? [[User:Ayvuir|Ayvuir]]
*Hey, it works for Superman. [[User:Ensign disposable|Ensign disposable]] 14:09, 7 September 2009 (CEST)

==To do==
*pics of Chris, especially young Chris and the funny ones
*life history
*brief outline of his views
*his future outlook
I'll do what I can to help this page along. I'm a wiki noob, learning as I go here. So, it won't look the best... [[User:MajorIronwood|MajorIronwood]]

We should add a sentence or two on the fact that he thinks he can call himself Christopher, just because it share the same abbreviation as Christian.~[[User:gourmetpickle|gourmetpickle]]
:Christopher WAS his name, until he changed to Christian when he was 12.--[[User:UncleBastard|UncleBastard]] 20:43, 10 March 2009 (CET)
:Boy, do I feel stupid. But then again, if he changed his name, he should have to pick or the other.~[[User:gourmetpickle|gourmetpickle]]
::That reminds me, we should add a few sentences about why he changed his name - I forget where but he had some story (maybe it was in the DVD slideshow) where he says how some teacher kept calling him "Christian" and the name "had a ring to it" so he changed it. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 16:52, 17 March 2009 (CET)
:::In addition, from [[CWC's_Pokésite_2| El PokéSite 2]], Christian considers his Spanish name to be Ricardo - Likely named after the Ricky Ricardo character from ''I Love Lucy''. Realistic equivalents might be found in ''Cris'', ''Cristián'', or ''Cristóbal'', but clearly these were not featured in the television shows he had watched prior to his High School Spanish classes. [[User:Mall Conductor Bear|Mall Conductor Bear]] 09:25, 12 May 2009 (CEST)
::::To be fair, one's "Spanish name" need not be the same as their real name. For example, in 7th grade my Spanish name was Jose, though my name isn't Joseph, and in 10th grade I was Che, even though I'm not Argentinian. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 06:02, 1 June 2009 (CEST)
:::More Name Crap: "-Chan" suffix is generally used for a little girl in Japanese. Chris is ''possibly'' too dense to realize this, and enjoys the similar pronunciation to 'Christian'. In doing so, there was no need to create a word jumble of existing letters, as that convention was given to his ''more open'' [[Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc|alter-ago]]. [[User:LBearington|LBearington]] 05:25, 1 June 2009 (CEST)

==Racism and Noviophobia==
Evidence of it goes back further than was previously thought. Read the notice to guys on [[Media:511-JumboLoveQuestSign.JPG|this sign]] from when he was 21. "(and to all MEN with girlfriends, except marrieds and blacks, go jump off a cliff)". Where the white women at? --[[User:Tumbleweed|Tumbleweed]] 04:10, 26 March 2009 (CET)
*I don't think that's racism though, because he's saying EXCEPT blacks. I think maybe he's paranoid about telling black people to jump off a cliff, because otherwise that's a hate crime. Sorta like when he made that post on his MySpace "I Respect the African American People." --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 04:12, 26 March 2009 (CET)
*Possibly, but since he's already stated that he simply doesn't like black people, I don't think it's likely. And besides, I don't think it would make much sense to make a special exception to black people unless you were hyper PC or just afraid of black people. (not to mention that he explicitly asks for only white women in later requests / demands / whines) --[[User:Tumbleweed|Tumbleweed]] 09:48, 26 March 2009 (CET)
*Yeah, it's racism. He's saying "Blacks don't need to jump off a cliff, because I'm using my outdated and quriky view that blacks stick with blacks relationship wise, and the same is true for whites. So, I don't worry about blacks impeding on my 'love quest.'" However, I don't think Chris would be able to articulate that well. --[[User:Tregnier2795|Tregnier2795]]
*Just a thought, should there be a separate article that would count how many times he's been racist other than his views of [[niggo]]s? --[[User:AntonImausMk2|AntonImausMk2]] 04:29, 3 November 2009 (CET)

== Mr. Darcy is much better than Chris, y'hear. ==

I had it noted, along with a picture of Colin Firth as Mr. Darcy to compare the two, that Mr. Darcy and Chris are in no way similar. This came about from the cliche "Well, he's no Mr. Darcy..."

I think it's a good visual aid. --[[User:Tregnier2795|Tregnier2795]]

==Let me tell you about this page==
It's great. It's fantastic. I read it for the first time in a while and I think it's the perfect, concise intro to Chris. The ED article on Chris sucks because it's so all over the place. True, we have the luxury of being a devoted wiki that instead of having to go into depth about Sonichu, we can just link to the article. The ED article is shit because it goes over the place, it's a bit out of date, and it picks poor samples of Chris's videos like just highlighting the "gaybian" vid. This is a fantastic article and this is why people come to us. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 10:03, 1 December 2009 (CET)

== Since there's no actual "Chris and..." page ==

I hope it's okay to discuss it here. I was wondering if a "Chris and Intelligence" page can be of any use. Some things to cover are his 1) logic, 2) academics and 3) philosophy (to cover his stupid quotes and advice). --[[User:AntonImausMk2|AntonImausMk2]] 09:56, 7 December 2009 (CET)
*That's sorta what [[honor roll]] is at the moment, though it really should be expanded to that as opposed to the focus on art (which really isn't what honor roll is about). Why I suggest honor roll because Chris will say something like "I'm smart, I was on honor roll." "I know math, I was on honor roll for the love of God!," etc. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 10:07, 7 December 2009 (CET)

We need a "Chris and Aspergers Syndrome" page. --[[User:CJB8895|Cody]]
==CWC split?==
"CWC" should redirect here, but I'm thinking maybe we should make a page devoted to Chris's initials. He uses them a lot, they're a recurring motif in his work, and we can even keep track of when he uses them as a pun (like "A CWC Audition"). Thoughts? --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 10:09, 7 December 2009 (CET)

==Page Needed==
Chris and Reliability - [[User:CJB8895|Cody]]

== cleaned-up, needs to be expanded/updated ==

--[[User:Sonijew|Sonijew]] 22:29, 29 December 2009 (CET)

== Contact information? ==

Okay. I realise I will be stepping into what can only be described as but a cat's whisker from the maw of hell- but I would like to talk to Christian Weston Chandler. I have a great deal of things to discuss with him and, rest assured, there will be luls. What is the best way to get in touch with him these days? I tried Facebook, but he doesn't seem to be checking it very often (I'm guessing he has a lot of trolls talk to him). I've also taken to staking out his AIM, but I'm guessing he doesn't use that either due to people spamming him with JULAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY. [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 02:26, 30 March 2010 (UTC)

I don't own a PS3 so somehow contacting him via the Playstation Network is also out. I live in Australia, so this makes things difficult. Thoughts? Suggestions? [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 14:20, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
:It's pointless to try and talk to Chris, as he will just ignore you. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 14:42, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
::Alec knows his personal phone number. I think that if you ask him nicely he might tell you. He certainly dosn't owe Chris anything. His Asperpedia account is ALBASPERCHU and his email is albasperchu(at)live.com --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 15:40, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
*1) please sign your comments (it's four tildas [~] in a row). 2) Chris's contact info should be in [[14 Branchland Court]], 3) if it isn't, it should be there. I think Cogs didn't want it with the logic is that if you have to ask for Chris's phone number and can't find it yourself when he's mentioned it frequently, you really shouldn't be trolling Chris. However, people asking for it all the time is annoying and it defeats the purpose of CWCki being an open source of information.
** Actually, I tried calling that number but either I fucked up international dialing (entirely possible) or it was disconnected (which is what I thought it said). [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 02:26, 30 March 2010 (UTC)
:That aside, I can guarantee that Chris will not listen to your call.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 16:26, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
::I know he'll ignore me, but at least it'll be funny. I'm not attempting to, directly, help him. [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 02:26, 30 March 2010 (UTC)
:CWCki is not a place to discuss how to troll or help Chris, if you want to contact Chris, do it, it won't have any effect on him whatsoever.[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 03:21, 30 March 2010 (UTC)
* I'd actually love to know if there's some online contact information at all. Inquiring minds need to know, since he evidently doesn't go on IRC anymore. anyone know where he can regularly be found? [[User:Boop|Boop]] 05:29, 18 April 2010 (UTC)

== Misapplication of social rules ==

Maybe this comment should go under the Autism page or the Honesty page but it seems like Chris's view of "Honesty" is likely influenced by an unspoken rule amongst nerdier internet communities where being extremely, unnecessarily open in private, especially with things verifiable by a third party, is seen as a way to build trust, due to the fact it is difficult if not impossible to establish it otherwise. My point being, he may have picked this sort of 'honesty' up from a geeky community somewhere. [[User:Insidious611|Insidious611]] 05:06, 12 April 2010 (UTC)

I will note said openness doesn't USUALLY extend to ones bowel issues or other information nobody in their right mind would want to know. But it may extend to relationships and especially trouble therein. [[User:Insidious611|Insidious611]] 05:07, 12 April 2010 (UTC)

Talk:12 January 2010

2010-04-16T00:15:39Z

Boop:

It's worth noting that [[wikipedia:A.D. Vision|A.D. Vision]] is a defunct [[anime]] company; they're the ones who released [[Excel Saga]] in the U.S.

Also, it's good to see that Chris is wearing the classic [[Advice Chris]] shirt again. --'''[[User:Lime|L]][[User_talk:Lime|i]][[Special:Contributions/Lime|m]][[nudes|e]]''' [[Image:Madotsuki.png]] 01:25, 13 January 2010 (UTC)
*Came here to say that; leaving satisfied =) [[Image:Advicedogshirt.png]]--[[User:Dude|Dude]] 01:47, 13 January 2010 (UTC)[[Image:Advicedogshirt.png]]

This might finally be the end of Chris's camera. Also I guess Ginger is his new sweetheart. --[[User:Sack Thaddic|Sack Thaddic]] 01:28, 13 January 2010 (UTC)
* Or be another Chloe, so I wouldn't raise my hopes too high. --[[User:CWCAttack|CWCAttack]] 02:19, 13 January 2010 (UTC)
* I'm guessing it is indeed another Chloe, as he seems pretty intent on making sure we KNOW he's giving a shout-out to the girl. --[[User:ALBASPERCHU|ALBASPERCHU]] 8:36 PM, 12 January 2010 (CST)

Holy shit, major rage at the end right there! And it looks like we may have a Ginger saga on our hands...[[User:ShotgunJones|ShotgunJones]] 01:37, 13 January 2010 (UTC)

Is that Marge Simpson in a towel on the wall back there? --[[User:Raikonos|Raikonos]] 01:38, 13 January 2010 (UTC)
** Yeah, I noticed that too. --'''[[User:Lime|L]][[User_talk:Lime|i]][[Special:Contributions/Lime|m]][[nudes|e]]''' [[Image:Madotsuki.png]] 01:41, 13 January 2010 (UTC)
***I think that's from a recent issue of Playboy. --[[User:Sack Thaddic|Sack Thaddic]] 01:47, 13 January 2010 (UTC)
****Ah yes, he seems to have purchased the infamous Marge Simpson issue. Really, who HASN'T seen this coming?[[User:ShotgunJones|ShotgunJones]] 01:53, 13 January 2010 (UTC)

I swear he's gonna displace his anger on an innocent soul one day. --[[User:CWCAttack|CWCAttack]] 01:40, 13 January 2010 (UTC)

did a mighty "CWC" little transcript here, feel free to add to it. also added the description for postierity! WATCH OUT ALEC HE KNOWS WHERE U LIVE OMG!!! [[User:ShotgunJones|ShotgunJones]] 01:42, 13 January 2010 (UTC)

Did you notice that he punches like a girl, also he made a fist wrong! --[[User:Briscoe|Briscoe]] 5:52 PM 1/10/10
:*I have been on the receiving end of many good punches and this one is unimpressive. Those are the ones I would gladly take only to put a hook in his jaw (one of my favorite CWC fantasy). [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 02:15, 13 January 2010 (UTC)

A little off-topic, but what from what forum is that screenshot of Liquid's glorious approval of Asperchu? --[[User:ALBASPERCHU|ALBASPERCHU]] 4:22 PM, 13 January 2010 (CST)
* Youtube comments on the second video. --[[User:Jerkop|Jerkop]] 23:25, 13 January 2010 (UTC)

Jesus Christ...we should have a recovery mission to try and save that poor camera. What did it do to anyone? - [[User:Boop|Boop]] 00:15, 16 April 2010 (UTC)

== Move? ==

Isn't the consistent titling style for movies like this supposed to be day, month, date? Shouldn't we move this to page to [[12 January 2010]]?--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 02:33, 13 January 2010 (UTC)
:* True... [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 02:46, 13 January 2010 (UTC)
:* Done! [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 02:49, 13 January 2010 (UTC)

==The Ring Of Fail==

This is the second (and third) time Chris wears his ring with his medallion. Sensory defensiveness syndrome or simple case of "Guido-Like" fashion statement? [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 14:24, 13 January 2010 (UTC)

==Classic Chris==
This kind of tard rage is what the CWCiverse has been missing for a while now. IMO, Mailbag 38+39 delivered fantastically. ^_____^ I'm going to email Chris again! [[User:Cadpig|- Cadpig]] 15:19, 13 January 2010 (UTC)

Exactly! This is wear all the trolling finally pays-off. This is what Chris is about; these are the lulz, savour them. [[User:Nimnoms|Nimnoms]] 21:57, 13 January 2010 (UTC)

==I wonder...==
I wonder if he [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|shat himself]] while filming this, especially after that epic tard scream? --[[User:CWCAttack|CWCAttack]] 03:03, 14 January 2010 (UTC)

I think he did right before the scream. [[User:Nimnoms|Nimnoms]] 08:24, 14 January 2010 (UTC)

== Wall of Fail ==

So how long has Chris had the Playboy picture of Marge Simpson up? [[User:AspergersCWC|AspergersCWC]] 03:17, 18 January 2010

It wasn't there in [[Down with Asperchu]], so it was put up some time between those videos. As of this posting, it's been about a week. --[[User:OFSheep|OFSheep]] 13:39, 18 January 2010 (UTC)

Talk:Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)

2010-04-15T01:17:24Z

Boop:

Old and so probably noticed by everyone, but the fact that he differentiates people as "Sonichu fans who hate me" and "Sonichu fans who do not hate me" implies that he thinks EVERYONE who reads/views his comic is a fan. Self deception is a wonderful thing.
-- [[User:Borednewb|Borednewb]] 04:24, 9 April 2010 (UTC)

I never knew vaginas were measured in ounces. -- [[User:Boop|Boop]] 01:17, 15 April 2010 (UTC)

Talk:Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)

2010-04-15T01:17:11Z

Boop:

Talk:Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown

2010-04-15T01:13:55Z

Boop: /* To do */

==To do==
*<strike>add some of the drama involved (especially his e-mail to Sony, about how he was hoping for his "first time in bed" with Megan at the hotel. </strike>
*<strike>his Adam Stackhouse response video (seems like it's been lost forever, so best we can do is describe it)</strike>
*<strike>his fake Sony page where Sony announces Chris-chan is the TRUE and HONEST winner and Adam Stackhouse has been disqualified.</strike>
*There was an IRC chat where he said that this was one of the three contests he won (though loosely - he only won those two PSPs, which he gave to Megan and her brother, IIRC).
*Didn't Chris get two PSPs out of this? Double check. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 15:29, 15 March 2009 (CET)
:*Also, I believe Chris has mentioned in some form that he won a PaRappa beanie cap (that cap PaRappa wears) in addition to a keychain (see [[Chris's Big Night Out]]). Need to verify this. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 03:59, 15 June 2009 (CEST)
I think someone from PVCC (maybe Arjen) contacted Adam Stackhouse or maybe it was a comment from Adam himself about how there were only about a dozen (yes, as in around 12) total contestants in the contest and if they stuck strictly to the rules, no one would have won really. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 23:40, 11 June 2009 (CEST)

Also, since some people have this impression that Chris is lying when he said he was one of the winners, Chris actually did win stuff - we know he won a beanie and a keychain, plus two PSPs (IIRC about the PSPs), it's only that he bitched about not being first place and winning the contest to PAX. But technically, he was a finalist so he did get stuff, he just wasn't the first place winner. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 07:59, 21 July 2009 (CEST)

Just going through some old pages... Is the CWC-Tok thing really relevant to this video? It seems to me more of a "THAT IS MY HOUSE" thing. [[User:Thelieisacake|Thelieisacake]] 22:59, 8 April 2010 (UTC)

The site he made and the myspace group appear to have been baleeted. Anyone have copies? [[User:Boop|Boop]] 01:13, 15 April 2010 (UTC)

Sonichu Girls

2010-04-14T04:32:40Z

Boop: /* The Spanish Letter, translated */

'''Sonichu Girls''' was a webforum for [[Christian Weston Chandler|Chris's]] female [[trolls|fanbase]]. A "little slice of heaven" for him. Founded by [[Sarah May]] and Cassie, aka CassiRosechu, in [[December 2008]].

==Chris's Posts on Sonichu Girls==
Cassie e-mailed Chris, informing him that she was a TRUE and HONEST Sonichu fan who helped start a webforum for female fans of Sonichu, and asked if he would make an appearance. The idea of a web forum of attractive young women delving into Chris's fantasy world appealed to his sense of narcissism and his hatred of [[JERKS|men]], so he made three posts, presented here in unaltered form (save for explanatory wiki links).

===Introduction===
{{quotebox|Yes, it's your man of the (Way More Than an) Hour.

I got the e-mail from "CassieRosechu", so I followed the address.

Y'all are just simply the Sweetest.

I've read my [[Speech Impediment|accent/voice]] was a favorited feature *blush*; I've rarely thought my voice was that alluring, although IMHO, it sounds like a direct-match to [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] (anywhere; from the classic and Sonic X shows and all games starting from Sonic Adventure), and when singing I can have a Frank Sinatra or Bing Crosby flavor.

Anyway, I'll pour a pint of my heart just for y'all. :)

Honestly, I don't know why I'm still single either; even my [[Barbara Chandler|own mother]] finds me handsome. Yet sometimes after she reminds me of that, I reply, "If I'm so handsome, why won't any women (in person) approach me?" During my [[Love Quest|Sweetheart Search]], while I'm waiting to be personally approached by an [[Attraction Sign|"18-(my age at that time and current) Boyfriend-Free, caring, smoke-free, non-alcoholic white girl, to make into a Sweetheart from the ground-up,"]] I did feel lonesome. Yet at the end of each time out to the location, I did feel a sad moment, but I take it with a "That's okay; maybe next time" attitude. But I can tell y'all understand from my past actions that I am honest, dedicated and true, and I truly appreciate that. If anything, that is exactly a neutral fact that I would wish to be fully understood among the worldwide [[trolls|fanbase]].

Aside from the understood fact, I feel that I am truly in touch with [[homos|my feminine side]], to the point where I am capable of learning from that to better understand how to treat women in a caring, nuturing, positive way; I've also learned from Red Skelton of how to be a gentleman. Sometimes I wonder between my caring attitude and the lack of a Sweetheart if I was born the wrong gender; I would wonder what life would have been like if I had actually been born a girl. But afterwards, I'd realize that I should still apreciate being born a boy to gentleman; [[Family Guy|God gave me the package, and I signed for it]].

Another thing I feel I should bring up is my honest feelings to validate my being Straight (although it goes without saying). I honestly feel more comfortable around women, because y'all are mostly more sympathetic and caring to another's feelings, y'all are mostly honest in your converstations, y'all are emotionally better and stronger than the majority of the male population, and simply put, y'all are simply fun and delightful to be around. And while it is true (and I am not ashamed to admit it) that I have seen my share of porn, I have learned how to better, positively treat a woman before, during and after the act. I would definitely stay until she woke up, and I would call her back later to see how her day was. And I have and would put the seat up then back down when I use the restroom she would use later. But I digress. When it comes to the private parts, be they covered or not, I look more at the [[china|female parts]], and definitely her face, because not only of my being straight, but every one is truly a masterful work of God's art that is simply beautiful in their own way. But even more beautiful beyond that which makes it truly a wonderous design are the individual personalities. I care more about every woman's feelings and opinions over their body.

On the flip side, I feel discomfort around men, because they can be such mean and cruel jerks. I could go on with what I detest about them, but I will not stoop to their level of cruelty. Also, I feel discomfort when shopping for underwear for myself; they do not need models pictured on the package. It grosses me out to see that thing. It's bad enough that I sometimes see my own when I look down (of which I don't feel as much discomfort), but the very sight of others is like kryptonite to me; it makes me feel like throwing up even when the image randomly pops up in my head.

<nowiki>*sigh*</nowiki>

I'm okay; I just took some deep breaths.

I want to thank y'all again for treating me like a King, not just with respect, but with emotional understanding of my feelings. And y'all do not need feel inhibitation in personally approaching me in public *blush*; shoot I would honestly feel most flattered and would personally/emotionally benefit from it (I would most welcome it).

Y'all know I live in Ruckersville, Virgina, and I can be found in the Charlottesville area when I'm out and about. Please feel free to say Hi or offer a hug or what you each feel is comfortable at the moment.

Love & Peace,
Christian W. Chandler.

ChrisChanSonichu@aol.com
PSN ID: Sonichu}}

====Pokeboy====
{{quotebox|If you all will recall, I had mentioned the idea of creating a one-time magazine of pictures of the Rosechus (minus [[Zapina]], since she's underage) being [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|sexy in underwear or naked]], as a [[women's rights|protest]] of mine against the [[ED]] jerks who drew [[pickles|dicks]] on my female characters and women in general; the heinous, slanderous act still infuriates me. But I withold my rage. A Sonichu Girl asked me when I was going to draw the comic of the Rosechus stripping in protest, so I felt I should put it to a popular vote.

Would you all like to see the multiple pages of the Rosechus being sexy in underwear or naked in the protest against those jerks in the Playboy parodied magazine, or do you all feel I would be crossing a line doing so?

If the popular vote is good, I will draw up the magazine either before or after drawing and coloring my [[Sonichu 9|#9 Comic Book]], depending on how I feel. I'll make my decision based on the popular responses after a week to a month's time.

Thank you all again for understanding my true meaning behind the stripping protest. :)

Love and Peace.}}

==Chris's [[hair]]==
Cassie, co-founder of Sonichu Girls, asked Chris for locks of his hair so all the Sonichu Girls can have them as souvenirs. Because Chris can't say no to a pretty lady ([[Trolls|or a dude pretending to be one]]), he went to the trouble of cutting his hair and placing the locks into small baggies with a certificate of authenticity signed by the big C himself. Due to the Mexican postal service [insert derogatory joke about Mexicans here], it took several months for the hair to reach Cassie. When it finally did, it was a shock.

Cassie described the hair as being [[Chris and health|"greasy"]] and having an [[Axe|odd odor]]. While Chris promised 200 locks of hair, only 23 packets were made. Chris included a letter to Cassie, in English and Chris's butchered version of Spanish, with each side having a Sonichu drawing, where the Spanish side has Sonichu in a sombrero ([[Chris and race|you know, BECAUSE ALL MEXICANS WEAR OVERSIZED SOMBREROS]]).

===The letter in English===
{{quotebox|Dear Cassie,

I hope you and your family are well. I apologize for not writing in a while, and I hope my spanish in this letter is good.

Good. I thought felt I should send you the sample of my hair locks I was able to divide for you and your friends including Sarah May. Enclosed in are 23 locks of my hair. I felt bad for not making 200 cards in the time. I've been through a bunch of bad times, and none good. I trust that you can understand fully, and I deeply thank you for that.
Like a (bonus points for whoever can read what he crossed out) trusted friend, I love you Cassie.

Love and Peace,
Christian W.Chandler.}}

===The letter in Spanish===

{{quotebox|Hola, Cassie,

Yo espero que estar bien, y tú familia están bien tambien. Yo lo siento que fue no escribi te por tan tiempo mucho. Y esto espero mí español aquí esta bien.

Bien, yo piensé qué yo debo enviar mí "samples" de pelo yo dividí para tu y su amigas de Sonichu Girls, incluia Sarah May. En esta "envelope", hay viente y tres tarjetas con mi pelo. Yo siento un poquito mal que no puedo dividir dos cien tarjetas durante el tiempo. Tenía veces mal mucho y veces bien tambien. Yo pienso bien que tu comprendes bien, y yo tengo muchas gracias para ti para comprender.

Como un amigo bueno, yo te amo.
Amor y paz,
Christian W. Chandler.}}

===The Spanish Letter, translated===

{{quotebox|Hello, Cassie

I hope that to be well, and you family are good too. I regret it that it was not I wrote to you during so time much. And this I hope my Spanish here is well.

Good, I thought what I should send my "samples" of hair I divided for you and your Sonichu girl friends, including Sarah May. In this envelope, there are 23 cards with my hair. I feel a little bad that I can't divide 200 cards during the time. I have bad times many and well times also. I think well that you understand well, and I have many thanks for you in order to understand.

As a good friend, I love you. Love and peace, Christian W. Chandler.}}

===Gallery of hair===
<center>
<gallery>
Image:ChrisHair1.jpg|Now future generations of trolls will be able to clone Chris so they can have their own manchild to troll.
Image:ChrisHair2.jpg|The entire packets of hair, ready for distribution to loyal Sonichu Girls (read: [[trolls]] and especially [[homos]] from rival [[Gay 4 Sonichu]])
Image:ChrisHair3.jpg|Chris went to the trouble of making a certificate of authenticity for each lock packet. You know, to keep people from cutting their own hair and claiming it to be Chris's.
Image:Dearcassie1.jpg|Letter accompanying the hair.
Image:Dearcassie2.jpg|Spanish translation of the letter.
Image:Hair1l.jpg|All the packets.
Image:Hair2.jpg|And the actual hair.
</gallery>
</center>

== Sonichu Girls revealed ==
On 23 [[February 2009]] (the day before Chris's birthday), the Sonichu girls forum was revealed to be nothing more than a fake fanbase created by [[Clyde Cash]]. The board itself then morphed into a message board to possibly be used by [[The Miscreants]]. In his post, Clyde made it very clear that "Sonichu Girls" was an attempt to troll Chris.<ref>http://sonichugirls.yuku.com/topic/120/t/I-Clyde-Cash-have-revealed-the-truth-behind-SonichuGirls.html</ref>

== References ==
<references />

== External links ==
*[http://sonichugirls.yuku.com The Miscreants message board (formally Sonichu Girls)]

[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Websites]]

Sonichu Girls

2010-04-14T04:32:10Z

Boop:

'''Sonichu Girls''' was a webforum for [[Christian Weston Chandler|Chris's]] female [[trolls|fanbase]]. A "little slice of heaven" for him. Founded by [[Sarah May]] and Cassie, aka CassiRosechu, in [[December 2008]].

==Chris's Posts on Sonichu Girls==
Cassie e-mailed Chris, informing him that she was a TRUE and HONEST Sonichu fan who helped start a webforum for female fans of Sonichu, and asked if he would make an appearance. The idea of a web forum of attractive young women delving into Chris's fantasy world appealed to his sense of narcissism and his hatred of [[JERKS|men]], so he made three posts, presented here in unaltered form (save for explanatory wiki links).

===Introduction===
{{quotebox|Yes, it's your man of the (Way More Than an) Hour.

I got the e-mail from "CassieRosechu", so I followed the address.

Y'all are just simply the Sweetest.

I've read my [[Speech Impediment|accent/voice]] was a favorited feature *blush*; I've rarely thought my voice was that alluring, although IMHO, it sounds like a direct-match to [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] (anywhere; from the classic and Sonic X shows and all games starting from Sonic Adventure), and when singing I can have a Frank Sinatra or Bing Crosby flavor.

Anyway, I'll pour a pint of my heart just for y'all. :)

Honestly, I don't know why I'm still single either; even my [[Barbara Chandler|own mother]] finds me handsome. Yet sometimes after she reminds me of that, I reply, "If I'm so handsome, why won't any women (in person) approach me?" During my [[Love Quest|Sweetheart Search]], while I'm waiting to be personally approached by an [[Attraction Sign|"18-(my age at that time and current) Boyfriend-Free, caring, smoke-free, non-alcoholic white girl, to make into a Sweetheart from the ground-up,"]] I did feel lonesome. Yet at the end of each time out to the location, I did feel a sad moment, but I take it with a "That's okay; maybe next time" attitude. But I can tell y'all understand from my past actions that I am honest, dedicated and true, and I truly appreciate that. If anything, that is exactly a neutral fact that I would wish to be fully understood among the worldwide [[trolls|fanbase]].

Aside from the understood fact, I feel that I am truly in touch with [[homos|my feminine side]], to the point where I am capable of learning from that to better understand how to treat women in a caring, nuturing, positive way; I've also learned from Red Skelton of how to be a gentleman. Sometimes I wonder between my caring attitude and the lack of a Sweetheart if I was born the wrong gender; I would wonder what life would have been like if I had actually been born a girl. But afterwards, I'd realize that I should still apreciate being born a boy to gentleman; [[Family Guy|God gave me the package, and I signed for it]].

Another thing I feel I should bring up is my honest feelings to validate my being Straight (although it goes without saying). I honestly feel more comfortable around women, because y'all are mostly more sympathetic and caring to another's feelings, y'all are mostly honest in your converstations, y'all are emotionally better and stronger than the majority of the male population, and simply put, y'all are simply fun and delightful to be around. And while it is true (and I am not ashamed to admit it) that I have seen my share of porn, I have learned how to better, positively treat a woman before, during and after the act. I would definitely stay until she woke up, and I would call her back later to see how her day was. And I have and would put the seat up then back down when I use the restroom she would use later. But I digress. When it comes to the private parts, be they covered or not, I look more at the [[china|female parts]], and definitely her face, because not only of my being straight, but every one is truly a masterful work of God's art that is simply beautiful in their own way. But even more beautiful beyond that which makes it truly a wonderous design are the individual personalities. I care more about every woman's feelings and opinions over their body.

On the flip side, I feel discomfort around men, because they can be such mean and cruel jerks. I could go on with what I detest about them, but I will not stoop to their level of cruelty. Also, I feel discomfort when shopping for underwear for myself; they do not need models pictured on the package. It grosses me out to see that thing. It's bad enough that I sometimes see my own when I look down (of which I don't feel as much discomfort), but the very sight of others is like kryptonite to me; it makes me feel like throwing up even when the image randomly pops up in my head.

<nowiki>*sigh*</nowiki>

I'm okay; I just took some deep breaths.

I want to thank y'all again for treating me like a King, not just with respect, but with emotional understanding of my feelings. And y'all do not need feel inhibitation in personally approaching me in public *blush*; shoot I would honestly feel most flattered and would personally/emotionally benefit from it (I would most welcome it).

Y'all know I live in Ruckersville, Virgina, and I can be found in the Charlottesville area when I'm out and about. Please feel free to say Hi or offer a hug or what you each feel is comfortable at the moment.

Love & Peace,
Christian W. Chandler.

ChrisChanSonichu@aol.com
PSN ID: Sonichu}}

====Pokeboy====
{{quotebox|If you all will recall, I had mentioned the idea of creating a one-time magazine of pictures of the Rosechus (minus [[Zapina]], since she's underage) being [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|sexy in underwear or naked]], as a [[women's rights|protest]] of mine against the [[ED]] jerks who drew [[pickles|dicks]] on my female characters and women in general; the heinous, slanderous act still infuriates me. But I withold my rage. A Sonichu Girl asked me when I was going to draw the comic of the Rosechus stripping in protest, so I felt I should put it to a popular vote.

Would you all like to see the multiple pages of the Rosechus being sexy in underwear or naked in the protest against those jerks in the Playboy parodied magazine, or do you all feel I would be crossing a line doing so?

If the popular vote is good, I will draw up the magazine either before or after drawing and coloring my [[Sonichu 9|#9 Comic Book]], depending on how I feel. I'll make my decision based on the popular responses after a week to a month's time.

Thank you all again for understanding my true meaning behind the stripping protest. :)

Love and Peace.}}

==Chris's [[hair]]==
Cassie, co-founder of Sonichu Girls, asked Chris for locks of his hair so all the Sonichu Girls can have them as souvenirs. Because Chris can't say no to a pretty lady ([[Trolls|or a dude pretending to be one]]), he went to the trouble of cutting his hair and placing the locks into small baggies with a certificate of authenticity signed by the big C himself. Due to the Mexican postal service [insert derogatory joke about Mexicans here], it took several months for the hair to reach Cassie. When it finally did, it was a shock.

Cassie described the hair as being [[Chris and health|"greasy"]] and having an [[Axe|odd odor]]. While Chris promised 200 locks of hair, only 23 packets were made. Chris included a letter to Cassie, in English and Chris's butchered version of Spanish, with each side having a Sonichu drawing, where the Spanish side has Sonichu in a sombrero ([[Chris and race|you know, BECAUSE ALL MEXICANS WEAR OVERSIZED SOMBREROS]]).

===The letter in English===
{{quotebox|Dear Cassie,

I hope you and your family are well. I apologize for not writing in a while, and I hope my spanish in this letter is good.

Good. I thought felt I should send you the sample of my hair locks I was able to divide for you and your friends including Sarah May. Enclosed in are 23 locks of my hair. I felt bad for not making 200 cards in the time. I've been through a bunch of bad times, and none good. I trust that you can understand fully, and I deeply thank you for that.
Like a (bonus points for whoever can read what he crossed out) trusted friend, I love you Cassie.

Love and Peace,
Christian W.Chandler.}}

===The letter in Spanish===

{{quotebox|Hola, Cassie,

Yo espero que estar bien, y tú familia están bien tambien. Yo lo siento que fue no escribi te por tan tiempo mucho. Y esto espero mí español aquí esta bien.

Bien, yo piensé qué yo debo enviar mí "samples" de pelo yo dividí para tu y su amigas de Sonichu Girls, incluia Sarah May. En esta "envelope", hay viente y tres tarjetas con mi pelo. Yo siento un poquito mal que no puedo dividir dos cien tarjetas durante el tiempo. Tenía veces mal mucho y veces bien tambien. Yo pienso bien que tu comprendes bien, y yo tengo muchas gracias para ti para comprender.

Como un amigo bueno, yo te amo.
Amor y paz,
Christian W. Chandler.}}

===The Spanish Letter, translated===

{{quotebox|Hello, Cassie

I hope that to be well, and you family be good too. I regret it that it was not I wrote to you during so time much. And this I hope my Spanish here is well.

Good, I thought what I should send my "samples" of hair I divided for you and your Sonichu girl friends, including Sarah May. In this envelope, there are 23 cards with my hair. I feel a little bad that I can't divide 200 cards during the time. I have bad times many and well times also. I think well that you understand well, and I have many thanks for you in order to understand.

As a good friend, I love you. Love and peace, Christian W. Chandler.}}

===Gallery of hair===
<center>
<gallery>
Image:ChrisHair1.jpg|Now future generations of trolls will be able to clone Chris so they can have their own manchild to troll.
Image:ChrisHair2.jpg|The entire packets of hair, ready for distribution to loyal Sonichu Girls (read: [[trolls]] and especially [[homos]] from rival [[Gay 4 Sonichu]])
Image:ChrisHair3.jpg|Chris went to the trouble of making a certificate of authenticity for each lock packet. You know, to keep people from cutting their own hair and claiming it to be Chris's.
Image:Dearcassie1.jpg|Letter accompanying the hair.
Image:Dearcassie2.jpg|Spanish translation of the letter.
Image:Hair1l.jpg|All the packets.
Image:Hair2.jpg|And the actual hair.
</gallery>
</center>

== Sonichu Girls revealed ==
On 23 [[February 2009]] (the day before Chris's birthday), the Sonichu girls forum was revealed to be nothing more than a fake fanbase created by [[Clyde Cash]]. The board itself then morphed into a message board to possibly be used by [[The Miscreants]]. In his post, Clyde made it very clear that "Sonichu Girls" was an attempt to troll Chris.<ref>http://sonichugirls.yuku.com/topic/120/t/I-Clyde-Cash-have-revealed-the-truth-behind-SonichuGirls.html</ref>

== References ==
<references />

== External links ==
*[http://sonichugirls.yuku.com The Miscreants message board (formally Sonichu Girls)]

[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Websites]]

Talk:CWC Update 29 July 2009

2010-04-09T02:40:18Z

Boop: /* Liquid's video */ new section

==Pro tip==
Chris actually uploaded the bulk of his Captain's Log [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Template:Captain%27s_Log&oldid=1648 here]. In the future, it may be profitable to check the [[CWCipedia]] first to see if Chris has posted the text of the Captain's Log, to save time on transcription. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 10:26, 29 July 2009 (CEST)
:*That's a good thought, but until Chris starts punctuating like a literate human being and actually sticking to his scripts, it'll probably be faster to just type up transcripts from scratch rather than trying to copy-paste Chris's own speech outlines and then make a thousand small corrections to them. [[User:Llort|Llort]] 16:01, 29 July 2009 (CEST)
:*Hilariously, he STILL thinks it's June there...! [[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 11:10 29 July 2009 (CEST)
I am only an observer in this situation. Without condemning or justifying actions of either groups, I offer my services as an Spanish translator for CWC's spanish dialogues. I am now working on tranlating them on my best of my abilities (18 years of Spanish). --[[User:Bystander|Bystander]] 03:57, 30 July 2009 (CEST)
*Thank you so fucking much. It's painful as hell but someone needs to do it. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 04:04, 30 July 2009 (CEST)
**Seems I was beaten to the punch, props to the other guy, I added my translation as an alternate. Chris has not a very good grasp of verbs conjugation and adequacy. The "comicos" (comedians) bit was hilarious. --[[User:Bystander|Bystander]] 04:48, 30 July 2009 (CEST)
:::*They are both very good translations, though I think that we should just have a literal (what Chris actually says) and a figurative (what Chris meant to say). --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 00:58, 31 July 2009 (CEST)

==Chris's transcriptions==
Chris was kind enough to provide his Spanish script and English translation [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/CWC_Speaks here]. Of course, we beat him to the punch by 21 hours or so but we can still use Chris's version to fix any corrections and fill any gaps. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 00:58, 31 July 2009 (CEST)
:Chris's version of the transcription is riddled with serious errors, like using the word for "anus" when meaning to write "year". [[User:Fat Nigger|Fat Nigger]] 06:30, 3 August 2009 (CEST)

==Extended Version==

...is down at the moment. When we use the Deleted Video template, should the video embedding info be deleted too to avoid confusion, or left up to show the video's details? - [[User:Liquid!|Liquid!]] 20:03, 1 March 2010 (UTC)

== Liquid's video ==

Translated the Spanish portion and a large portion of the French, but the combination of grating voice and an inability to speak the language properly made me stop. Will possibly be back, but if one better than me chooses to edit, by all means, go ahead.

CWC Update 29 July 2009

2010-04-09T02:36:38Z

Boop: tried my hand at translating what I could. Will possibly come back to finish the French.

In "'''CWC Update 29 July 2009'''" (officially "'''CWC Update 07292009'''" for the original video and its extended cut, "'''CWC Update 07292009-2'''" for the Spanish companion video), [[Chris]] explains that he is a [[troll]] trolling trolls. Note that he somehow grew his full goatee back instantly.

He would later replace the video with an extended version, which adds a close-up of his driver's license and Chris asking his viewers to read about the [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens]] on [[CWCipedia]], which he claims to be the new, official [[Sonichu]] website. Also of note is the addendum, in which Chris horribly mangles the language of Cervantes and infuriates many a speaker of the world's second language with most native speakers.

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Update 29 July 2009
| image = {{#ev:youtube|w5AokNuon50}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 29 July 2009
| Maker = [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = {{Reason}} Reason
| Saga = {{Liquid}} [[Liquid]]
| Shirt = {{RedShirt2}} Red Stuttgart
| previous = [[CWC More Than A Feeling | CWC More than a Feeling]]
| next = [[That Goatee WILL Grow Back | That Goatee WILL Grow Back]]
}} </center>
===Transcript===

Alright... [[Captain's Log]], Stardate: July 29th, 2009.

Let's get this over with right off the bat. Dispelling rumors and making a few points. There are NO official [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] merchandise yet. Whatever you're buying right now, it's fake, especially from the damn [[niggos|black]]—brown... brown striped [[CChanSonichuCWC|impostor]] posing as me. Ignore all [[YouTube]] videos portraying me in a wrong sense, especially if it is not on my TRUE YouTube account, this one: I-B-A Chandler! Portra—playing also playing off of my father's license plate... a little bit. I B Mr. C! Follow Mr. C's, I'm an important C. (?) Mr. Chandler. [[IBAChandler]].

And yes, it is true, [[Rollin' and Trollin'|I have called myself a troll]], because I am trolling my trolls back! So, in a sense, I am a troll to those trolls ONLY. I am not a troll to any of the TRUE, [[HONEST]] people out there. I just—because of the Internet, and whatnot, it's hard to tell the difference. So, if you're not a troll, and you know you're not, it does not apply to you. Otherwise, you know you're a troll. I'M TROLLIN' YOU BACK!

And... it's okay to be... [[autism|stupid]] sometimes. Stupid... [[It's UGH!|damn, dirty song!]] While it is NOT okay to be [[Homos|homosexual]], I will let—[[Lie|I will personally not judge any individual of that... one trait]]. I am willing to be friends with homosexuals. And let me make it clear: I will NOT TOLERATE ANY FURTHER DAMN, DIRTY STUPID QUESTIONS QUESTIONING MY DANG ORIENTATION! I, CHRISTOPHER "CHRISTIAN" WESTON CHANDLER, AM STRAIGHT! Have good faith... in me. And... to all my loyal, true [[trolls|viewers, fans everybody]]: you will be rewarded.

I leave that with you. Peace, and have a good day.

==Extended version==
{{Deletedvideo}}
<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Update 29 July 2009 (Extended)
| image = {{#ev:youtube|MW-FGuCtIH8}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 29 July 2009
| Maker = [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = {{Reason}} Reason
| Saga = {{Liquid}} [[Liquid]]
| Shirt = {{RedShirt2}} Red Stuttgart
| previous = [[CWC More Than A Feeling | CWC More than a Feeling]]
| next = [[That Goatee WILL Grow Back | That Goatee WILL Grow Back]]
}} </center>

===Transcript===

Alright. Captain's Log, Stardate: July 29th, 2009.

Let's get this over with, right off the bat. Dispelling... rumors. And making a few points. [''looks at a piece of paper, apparently with his notes''] There are no... official... Sonichu or Rosechu merchandise yet. Whatever you're buying, right now, it's FAKE, especially from the damn black—brown—brown-STRIPED impostor posing as me. [''looks back at paper''] And I can best prove who I am. [''moves away from camera, but comes closer to it and shoves his face in the camera''] CLOSE UP. ZOOMING in on ME. [''shoves driver's license into the camera, mumbles''] With... my driver's license... with the customer number censored. [''flips the license around''] Can you copy FRONT and BACK? FRONT and BACK? [''turns it to its side''] THICKNESS? [''flips to the back''] Front.... [''flips back to the front''] Front reflective Virginia.... Can you see it? [''pulls license away and shoves his face back in''] I think... [''dramatic glasses removal''] ...not.

I think not. ''flashes license again'']

[''steps back into proper frame, reads off of paper'']

Ignore all YouTube videos portraying me in a wrong sense. Especially if it's not on my true YouTube account, this one, '''''IBA'''Chandler''. Portray—playing—also playing off my father's license plate. Little bit. I be Mr C. A lot of Mr. C's.... I'm an important C.: Mr. Chandler. I be a Chandler.

[''looks back at paper'']

And yes, it is true: I have called myself a troll because I'm trolling my trolls back, so, in a sense, I am a troll to those trolls only. I am NOT a troll to any of the other True and Honest people out there. [''replaces glasses''] I just—because of the internet and whatnot, it's hard to tell the difference. So, if you are not a troll, and you know you're not, this does not apply to you. Otherwise, if you know you're a troll.... [''shrugs, then points dramatically''] I'M TROLLING YOU BACK! [''points and goes to say something, but doesn't'']

AND... it'sokaytobestupids. [''he says this fast and softly, then mumbles''] ...That damn, dirty song. [''looks at paper, ponders.''] While it's NOT okay to be homosexual, I will not j—I will not personally judge any individual [''removes glasses again, and starts reading off the paper''] ...that one trait. I am willing to be friends with the homosexuals. And let me make it clear: [''drops glasses, lifts finger''] I will not tolerate '''any more damn, dirty, stupid question my dang orientation'''! I, Christopher Christian Weston Chandler, am STUH-RAIGHT! Have good faith in me.

And to all my True, Loyal viewers, fans, everybody. You will be rewarded. Look up the history of the Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens for one, a full, extended story from. My. Head. And my hands, typed. On the new, the official, as of 2009, the new s—the official s—CWC's Sonichu and Rosechu Site.

I will leave that with you. Peace, and have a good day.

==Addendum==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Update 29 July 2009 (Addendum)
| image = {{#ev:youtube|9M4sHq3Y0KM}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 29 July 2009
| Maker = [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Performance Style = {{Reason}} Reason
| Saga = {{Liquid}} [[Liquid]]
| Shirt = {{GreenStripeShirt2}} Green Striped
| previous = [[CWC More Than A Feeling | CWC More than a Feeling]]
| next = [[That Goatee WILL Grow Back | That Goatee WILL Grow Back]]
}} </center>

===Transcript===

====Original====

''Captain's Log, Stardate: May(?) 29th, 2009''

¡AY! Impostor en rayas de marrón. Yo tenía dos años de español en mi escuella secundaria, Manchester High. Con mi señora bonita.

Y yo recibe durante los ''classes'' el apodo que yo use para mi Internet, RICARDO, mi nombre fue Ricardo en las clases de español. Recuerde el es- el Pokésite de R.W.C [''the W is pronounced ''doble ve'' like in Spain''] con ''CWC Pokésite 2'', ''CWC's Bionicle site'', ''CWC's Hot Wheels site'', ''the original CWC Sonichu site''.

Yo voy a hacer una apuesta. Que tu el impostor no graduaste desde [''high pitch''] TU escuela secundaria. ¡En serio! [''cut''] Yo, el verdad, Christopher Christian "Ricardo" Weston Chandler, no solamente me gradue de Manchester High con mi TITÚLIO [shows degree, then puts it down]. Mi titúlio de ''basketball'' en mi fi- en mi año de ''freshman'' [''shows his basketball degree, proceeds to put it down'']. ¡Stupido! TU ERES STUPIDO.

No solamente con ellos, pero con mis puntos de ''HONOR ROLL''. ¡Bueño!

¿Y como fue escribe en los comicos de Sonichu [''feels his badge''], Rosechu y yo? [''semi-gangster expression''] ¡Yo!

Yo fue a Piedmont Virginia Community College para mi—[''cut''] Para mi titulo y certificado para ''COMPUTA EDIT DRAFTING AND DEZAIN''. [''shows both certificates, and the second one seems to have some Chris-chan Sonichu & Megan art'']

Que yo diplomade muy bueño y recibe en... ''June, 2006''. [''guess he never learned how to say dates in Spanish'']

¿Donde está tu titulo de Manchester High? Tu titulo de Piedmont de t—¿Tu certificado de Piedmont de ''Computer-Ai—drafting & design''?

¿Donde estan? Tu no tienes. [''dramatic glasses removal''] Tu no tienes. ¿VERRRRDAD?

Tu no tienes, yo tiene. Yo soy el verdad Christopher Christian "Ricardo" Weston Chandler. Entonces, POR FAVOR. Para todo el—todos los veces en el futuro y ahora. [''hand gestures''] ¡Dejar de este juego maldito! Impostor, tonto y estupido. [''homo pose'']

También. Mi presente. Responde en español bueño. [''because your Spanish is excellent, Ricardo''] ¿Si no que bueño? Tu no eres el verdad. Tu eres el impostor.

¿Responde en Ingles? No es bueño. No es bueño, tonto impostor en rayas de marrón.

Paz.

====English translation====

Captain's Log, Stardate May(?) 29th, 2009

Aye! The impostor in brown stripes! I have two years of Spanish in my secondary school, Manchester High, with my pretty lady.

And during class I received the nickname I use on the Internet "[[Ricardo Weston Chandler|Ricardo]]". Ricardo, my name in Spanish is Ricardo. Remember the Pokésite of RWC with CWC Pokésite 2 CWC Bionicle site and original Sonichu site.

I'm gonna bet you impostor that you didn't graduate from your high school. Really? I the real Christian Ricardo Weston Chandler not only did I graduate from Manchester High School [''shows his high school diploma''] with my diploma. My basketball diploma from my freshman year [''shows his stupid diploma''] Stupid.... You are stupid!

Not only with them but with my honor roll points, good!

And how was it that I wrote the comedians [''translator's note: He actually says comedians, instead of comics''] of Sonichu Rosechu and me?

I went to PVCC for my title, certificate of CADD [''shows a couple of diplomas, and second one of the them with his stupid Chris-chan drawing holding Megan''] I received a very good diploma in June 2006.

Where is your title from Manchester High? Where is your certifica...—your certificate from PVCC for CADD? WHERE ARE THEY? You don't have them.... You don't have them, right?

You don't have them; I have them. I am the real Christopher "Christian" "Ricardo" Weston Chandler. So, please, for eve... for all time in the future and now. Leave this damned game, you stupid dumb impostor.

Also, please respond in good Spanish, if not good? You are not real, you are the impostor, respond in English? NOT GOOD. NOT GOOD, YOU DUMB IMPOSTOR!!!

Peace

====Altenate translation====

Captain's Log, Stardate: May(?) 29th, 2009

Aye! The impostor in brown stripes! I have two years of Spanish in my secondary school, Manchester High, with my pretty lady.
And I received during my classes [''jump/pause''] the nickname that I used for my Internet: Ricardo. My name is Ricardo in the Spanish classes.

Remember the Pokésite de R.W.C con CWC Pokésite 2, CWC [''unintelligible''], the Original CWC Sonichu site.

I am going to make a bet: that you, the impostor didn't graduated from High School. Really? I the true, Christian Ricardo Weston Chandler. Didn't just graduated from Manchester High with my DEGREE. [''shows degree, then lowers it''] my degree of Basketball in my freshman year [''same previous motion'']. Stupid, you are stupid!

Not only it takes years but with my points of Honor Roll. Good! [''cut''] And how it was who wrote in the comics of Sonichu, Rosechu and me, me! I went to Piedmont Virginia Community College for my title and certificate for Computer-Aided Drafting and Design. [''shows both certificates, and the second one seems to have some Chris-chan Sonichu & Megan art''] That I diplomated and received in June 2006.

Where is your title from Manchester High? Your title from Piedmont, your certificate from Piedmont for Computer-Aided Drafting and Design.

Where are they? You don't have them. [''dramatic glasses removal''] You don't have them, RIGHT?

You don't have them, I do. I am the true Christian "Ricardo" Weston Chandler. So, PLEASE, for all future and now actions. Stop this damned game! You stupid and dumb impostor.

Also, I present. Respond in good Spanish. If not, what good? You are not the real one. You are the impostor.

Respond in English? Not good. Not good, dumb impostor in brown stripes.

Peace.

==== A Spanish correction (AKA what Chris would've said if he could speak in Spanish at all) ====

Bitácora del Capitán, Fecha Estelar: 29 de Mayo, 2009

¡Ay, impostor de rayas cafés! Yo llevé dos años de Español en mi preparatoria,
Manchester High, con mi querida maestra. Durante estas clases, recibí el apodo que
uso en internet, RICARDO. Este fue mi nombre en las clases de Español. Recuerden
el ''Pokésite'' de R.W.C, el segundo ''Pokésite'' de CWC, el sitio de bionic de CWC y el
sitio original de Sonichu.

Voy a hacer una apuesta. Apuesto a que tú, impostor, no te graduaste de tu preparatoria. ¡En serio! Yo el verdadero, Christopher "Christian" "Ricardo" Weston Chandler, no solamente me gradué de Manchester High con mi TÍTULO, sino también con mi título de Basquetbol en mi primer año. ¡Estúpido! ERES UN ESTÚPIDO.

Y no solamente me gradué con éstos [''diplomas''], sino también con mis puntos en el Cuadro de Honor. ¿Cómo ves?

¿Y quien fue el que escribió los cómics de Sonichu, Rosechu, y yo? ¡YO!

YO fui a la Universidad Comunitaria de Piedmont Virginia para obtener mi título y certificado en Diseño Asistido por Computadora.

Me gradué perfectamente, y me recibí en Junio del 2006.

¿Donde está tu titulo de Manchester High? ¿Tu título de Piedmont de t—
¿Tu certificado de Piedmont en Diseño Asistido por Computadora?

¿Donde están? No los tienes, Tú no los tienes, ¿VERDAD?

Tú no los tienes, pero yo sí. Yo soy el verdadero Christopher Christian "Ricardo"
Weston Chandler. Entonces, por favor, para siempre, ahora y en el futuro,
¡deja este maldito juego! Impostor tonto y estúpido.

Además, me presenté. Ahora tú responde en español correcto. ¿No puedes? Entonces no eres el
verdadero. Tú eres el impostor.

¿Respondes en inglés? Eso no es bueno, no está bien, tonto impostor de rayas marrones.

Paz.

==Liquid's response==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Liquid's Response
| image = {{#ev:youtube|yYAAc9zAVQw}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 29 July 2009
| Maker = [[Liquid|Liquid]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Reason.png]] Reason
| Saga = [[Image:Liquid_saga.png]] [[Liquid]]
| previous =[[CWC More Than A Feeling ]]
| next = [[That Goatee WILL Grow Back]]
}} </center>

===Transcript===

Hola! Este es el verdadero Ricardo Weston Chandler. Impostor en el pequeño chaleco, yo no solo comprender su ultimo video, pero tiene excelente dominio de la idioma de Cervantes. Puedo establecer mi identidad hablan muchos idiomas. Je parle aussi Français comme je l'ai pris dans le français des mes années lycées à Manchester. Avec ma jolie professeure de français. J'ai obtenu ma [sic] diplôme avec mes [????]. J'ai même un certificat

[This translation stops at about 1:02 because for some reason his voice becomes really squeaky and his pronunciation is really bad in the first place. I tried to give him the benefit of the doubt in every possible situation. If anyone else would like to have a go, enjoy.]

====Translation====

Hello! This is the real Ricardo Weston Chandler. Impostor in the vest small, I do not only to understand your last video, but it has excellent command over the Spanish language. I can establish my identity they speak many languages. I also speak French as I learned it in the French some my high school years at Manchester. With my pretty French teacher. I got my diploma with my [????]. I even have a certificate

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[CWC More Than A Feeling ]]|nextlink=[[That Goatee WILL Grow Back]]|}}
{{Captain's Log}}

{{The Cwcivil War of 2009}}

[[Category: Captain's log entries| 2009-07-29]]
[[Category: Liquid Saga]]

La Cocina en La Casa de Casanova

2010-04-09T01:42:08Z

Boop: /* Translation */

'''"La Cocina en La Casa de Casanova"''' (i.e., '''The Kitchen in Casanova's House''') is the fifth track from ''[[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (album)|Christian and the Hedgehog Boys]]''.

More than anything else, this song demonstrates Chris's total mastery of the [[Ricardo Weston Chandler|Spanish language]].

==Listen==

<center>{{#ev:youtube|s_NjT6RX26c}}</center>

===Lyrics===

[''sung over Ricky Martin's "La Copa de La Vida"'']

¡Casanova! 
¡Casanova! 
¡Casanova! 

¡Estamos en la cocina! 
¡En la casa de Casanova! 
¡Estamos divertido, sí! [?] 
¡Bailamos con la música! 

¡Hay muchas chicas y niñas aquí 
En la casa! 

¡Casanova está muy feliz 
Porque está hacienda cosas calientes! 

¡Hace calor! ¡Hace calor! 
¡Casanova! 

Here we go! 
¡Olé, olé, olé! 
Go, go, go! 
¡Olé, olé, olé! 

¡Esta noche… 
Esta noche sera 
Diversión! [?] 
¡Olé, olé, olé! 

¡Uno, dos, tres! 
¡Olé, olé, olé! 
Un, deux, trois! 
¡Olé, olé olé! 

Because he 
Is Casanova! 
Go, go, go! 
¡Olé, olé, olé! 

¡Olé, olé! (¡Olé, olé!) [repeat to end] 

¡Casanova!

===Translation===

Casanova! 
Casanova! 
Casanova! 

We're in the kitchen! 
In Casanova’s house! 
We’re fun, yes! [?] 
We’re dancing with the music! 

There are lots of girls and girls here 
In the house! 

Casanova is very happy 
[[Sex|Because he’s doing hot things!]] 

It's hot! It's hot! 
Casanova! 

Here we go! 
¡Olé, olé, olé! 
Go, go, go! 
¡Olé, olé, olé! 

This night… 
This night will be 
Fun time! [?] 
¡Olé, olé, olé! 

One, two, three! 
¡Olé, olé, olé! 
Un, deux, trois! 
¡Olé, olé olé! 

Because he 
Is Casanova! 
Go, go, go! 
¡Olé, olé, olé! 

¡Olé, olé! (¡Olé, olé!) [repeat to end] 

Casanova!

{{Hedgehog Boys}}

[[Category: Christian and the Hedgehog Boys]]