CWCki - User contributions [en]

Talk:Greene County Conspiracy

2010-05-09T06:30:02Z

BrokenDead89: /* The Conspiracy */

Starting transcription [[User:Urist|Urist]] 04:55, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

A video was released earlier by solidsnakeproductions giving a gay craigslist user looking for good times directions to Chris' house...could this be why he made this video? [[User:LouisLash|LouisLash]] 2:14, 9 May 2010 (UTC)
*Doubtful. By the sounds of it, Chris won tickets for some sporting event, no one wanted to go with his smelly ass and when he did go, he was reminded he was a [[Virgin with rage]] by the lovey-dovey couple beside him. Thus, he decided to go after others, blaming ''two fucking counties'' for playing Kick the Autistic!--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 05:17, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

==Name Change==
I know, it just got put up, but this page needs a better name. I vote for either "Chris Whines The Blues" or "The Greene County Conspiracy"--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 05:09, 9 May 2010 (UTC)
*Moving it here, so it can be seen.--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 05:15, 9 May 2010 (UTC)
*I like "The Greene County Conspiracy". -[[User:Ezra Mason|Ezra Mason]] 05:39, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

==Cry some more, Chris==
Hahahahahaha! His tears taste magnificent! Greatest CWC video in a while. We're fucking breaking him. [[User:CrookedSmirk|CrookedSmirk]] 05:30, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

==Pertinence==
This is worth mentioning in so many other articles. Namely, the articles on [[reality]] and his [[ego]] come to mind. It's a conspiracy, folks! -[[User:Ezra Mason|Ezra Mason]] 05:39, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

== Chris's Shirt. ==

Hey everyone. I make a crappy smalltime riffing video series for fun, and I decided to ''possibly'' riff this video. I typically brighten videos up when I riff them if they're retardedly dark, and I noticed no one had an idea of what shirt he's wearing, so I took a screencap of my best effort to brighten Chris's day.

http://imgur.com/ygTLM.jpg

It appears to be a new shirt, either a tank top or a tee with the sleeves rolled up, with what I ''believe'' to be the Hogwarts shield on it. Chances are I'm wrong on that, though.

Also, I've noticed he's lost ''alot'' of hair. That may be the reason why he's obstructing himself.

I hope it helps! --[[User:ToyoWolf|Kimo]] 05:45, 9 May 2010 (UTC)
* First of all, it looks like the shirt's an orange ''Sonic Heroes'' t-shirt. The little emblem by his left manboob looks like the ''Sonic Heroes'' logo. Second of all, holy shit, where did his hair go?! I know he had more than that when he did that video gloating over removing that piece!--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 05:48, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

* That frame exaggerates the state of his hair. The camera isn't looking straight at him like it is in the beginning, and the aspect ratio hasn't been enforced. Here's another frame: http://i.imgur.com/Ic9XE.jpg --[[User:Lurker|Lurker]] 06:20, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

* Ah, crap, I forgot I changed the ratio. Sorry about that x3

Yes, this one is much better. I can tell there is a character in that emblem on his shirt, but I'm not sure who it is... It looks like either Dee Dee from Dexter's Lab or XJ9 from My Life As A Teenage Robot to me. It also looks like there's a...rocketship? I believe? --[[User:ToyoWolf|Kimo]] 06:26, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

==The Conspiracy==
I guess I misunderstood the video, because I thought Chris was whining that he would have had a better life in Chesterfield county, but the Chandlers got stuck in Greene county because they couldn't sell the house they are currently living in. Could somebody help a poor slow-in-the-mind like me figure this out? Thanks in advance (please type slowly). [[User:Squirrelbait|Squirrelbait]] 06:17, 9 May 2010 (UTC)
*Assuming what Chris is telling us is true, I reckon it goes like this. For about the latter five years of the 90s, 14 Branchland Court in Ruckersville was empty while the Chandlers lived in Richmond and Chris was in high school. If they'd successfully sold 14 Branchland Court, they would have had the money to buy a permanent place in the Richmond area. Since they couldn't sell it, it wasn't cost-effective to keep renting homes in Richmond while also paying property taxes on the Ruckersville house and letting it fall into even worse disrepair. Thus, the move back to Ruckersville after Chris graduated high school. Which more or less rings true to me, altogether. (The part about realtors conspiring with the school district...well, yeah.) Anyway, I updated a couple of the articles on Chris's homes with this data, I think I hit the main ones that needed it. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 06:26, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

(1) Chris attends elementary school in Greene County, where sitting on the principal's lap gives him homophobia and a group of teachers abuses him by holding him down and recording his screams and cries. The school board wants him institutionalized so his family moves to Chesterfield County, but keep their house in Greene County.
(2) Chris goes to school in Chesterfield County, where he Comes Out of His Autistic Shell, makes lots of Gal-Pals, and creates Sonichu.
(3) Chris graduates and moves back to Greene County, away from all of his Gal-Pals, and begins his decline. PVCC is in Greene County. If his family had been able to sell their house (it sounds like they must not have had any interest in selling their house) then they would still live in Chesterfield County. You can see pictures of the move in A Week In The Life of Christian Weston Chandler, which is about his High School graduation.
[[User:Urist|Urist]] 06:25, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

Simple answer: Chris is blaming everyone else for his problems. How do you not get how this works? [[User:BrokenDead89|BrokenDead89]] 06:30, 9 May 2010 (UTC)

Chris and money

2010-05-04T15:50:37Z

BrokenDead89: /* But wait, Chris isn't employed! */

It's obvious that [[Chris]] himself has no grasp on the real value of '''money''', since he actively wastes as much of his [[monthly tugboat]] as possible on luxuries like [[Eye of Judgement|trading cards]], [[Officer Nasty|sex toys]], [[Duck|porn]], [[PS3|video games]], and, more recently, [[alcohol]]. He also once, when giving out the laws of [[CWCville]], equated 10 years in prison to a $1,500 fine.<ref>[[Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008]]</ref> He also equated 50 hours of community service to $500 (for any sexual violations).<ref>[[Mailbag_31#Magi-Chan_knows_when_you_fuck]]</ref>

Chris is a self-admitted impulse buyer. His [[PSN]] account shows that he's never played more than half of the games he's bought. And yet, astoundingly, he's still gone out of his way to buy ''all'' available downloadable content for ''every'' PS3 game that he's ever purchased, and he also further promoted his Sony fanboyism by later buying a Sony LCD HDTV for his bedroom which likely cost at least about $1,000-$1,500. All the while, Chris buys his [[Chris and fashion|clothes]] at second-hand discount thrift stores.

==But wait, Chris isn't employed! ==

Chris is what most would call a welfare leech. Chris's only source of income is the $800 [[monthly tugboat|"tugboat"]] that he receives from the federal government every month, placing his annual income at $9,600 a year. Chris's parents take $450 to pay for room and board.<ref>Miyamoto Saga</ref> In addition, Chris and his family get [[Wikipedia:Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program|SNAP]] money every month- more commonly known as food stamps.

{{quote|My father helped me get my Social Security set up; I get more a month than I could at a job. |Chris, completely deluded.}}

To put this in perspective, at the time of writing, minimum wage in the state of [[Virginia]] is 7.25 USD, pursuant to federal minimum wage. If Chris were to somehow do a complete 180 on his life and begin working a full 40-hour week, his monthly payment before taxes and payment for room and board would be approximately 1,160 USD. This would put Chris's annual income range, before tax, at roughly 13,920 USD. Subtracting what he pays his parents to live in filth monthly, as well as the 5% tax his income range mandates in the state of Virginia, Chris could very likely be left with a ridiculous 7,824 USD in ''spending'' money, as in, for more sex toys and video games. Contrast this with the 4,200 USD Chris pulls annually from the government after paying off his parents (roughly equal to what he's spent in total so far on his PS3); it becomes clear Bob's encouragement of Chris's not seeking employment has ''nothing'' to do with money. He knows his son is a [[fail]]ure.

Chris strongly believes that by receiving and spending his tugboat on useless shit he is aiding the economy and paying for the tugboat of others.<ref>[[Mailbag 34]]</ref> This is complete dumbassery since sales tax goes to the state government and these "tugboats" are paid with federal payroll tax. Apparently, this is too complex for Chris's autistic mind. Where Chris is hiding the printing press to afford this discretionary spending is unknown.

Interestingly enough, while he has no clue how to handle money, Chris has an unhealthy [[Ego|fixation]] on his material possessions. In [[Vivitheg's AIM chat]], he stated that he did not want to sell any of his stuff; and in the [[Miyamoto Saga]], he refused to sell anything to help raise money for the trip to Redmond.

==Credit cards==
As surprising as it is that Chris has his own credit cards, it is equally unsurprising how unwisely he uses them. Chris has managed to rack up $2,000 worth of debt (according to [[Mumble 4]], 1000 of which comes from the PSN store, but this number has increased over the past few weeks) and has even stolen his parents' credit cards to use when his were maxed out. Being the greedy twat that he is, when Chris finally does make payments towards his debts, he always does so in the smallest installments possible, freeing himself to spend as much as he has (or more) on worthless shit, entirely oblivious to the fact that he's only increasing his debt by letting interest charges rack up. Economists are currently working on the theory that it is Chris's debts, not the collapse of financial institutions, which have caused the current global financial crisis.

==In the comic==
In [[Sonichu (comic)|the comic]] it is clear Chris has no idea how money works. [[Sonichu]], [[Rosechu]], [[Patti-Chan]], and most likely, all of the other characters live off welfare, just like Chris IRL. He seems to have no concept of tax, or that it's the American populace who pay for his [[Kimmi|bullshit]]. Sonichu and Rosechu are living in a two story house with an attic offered by the city and they are [[Mailbag 21#Home economics|"paid" in average]] of $3,500 a month just to hang around.

This, along with what else we know about [[CWCville]], could mean that Chris is a communist, or at the very least, a socialist. Of course, he's most likely too much of a retard to actually know what that means.

In [[Sonichu 9|Episode 19]], it's shown that CWCVille actually uses its own currency, in the form of C Quarters, W Quarters, and C Quarters. 10 C Quarters make up a W Quarter, and 10 W Quarters make up a C Quarter. Don't bother asking how that makes sense in any way, especially considering what the word "quarter" means.

==In other works==
Chris shows us his complete misunderstanding of the stress his ideas would put on the American Social Security system if he was left in charge of it in a text called "[[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas Story]]." This is where the idea of "Soup Hotels" came from.

{{quote|Even the homeless have a place to stay in the ten Soup Kitchens/Hotels. |Chris with a very bad idea...}}

So, what is a "Soup Hotel"? Chris describe it in the [[Mailbag 20]] as a building ten stories tall with 10 to 20 rooms per floor, equipped with single bathrooms, bed, lighting and Cable TV. Of course, the homeless will stay there for free. So, instead of building Homeless shelters with dormitories, commons rooms and shared TV sets, Chris think the homeless should be treated to all the comforts of a ''bona fide'' hotel. This means that, in CWCville, there're around 1000-2000 homeless people left outside. This might be the result of the local industry, chocked by heavy taxes needed to pay those social expenses, are unable to make a profit there and are moving away.

In [[Sonichu 10]], [[Ultra Sonichu]] and bevy of Rosechus stop at a soup hotel. The building is labeled Soup Hotel 17, implying that CWCville has had to open 7 new homeless shelters in the span of a month, or they're just bad at numbering the things.

In [[Mailbag 29]] he states that $10 an hour is a reasonable price to pay for sex with a prostitute. To show his further ignorance of simple economics, Chris proposed a chain of state-run brothels where this shockingly inexpensive fee would not only pay women for sex, pay the salary of a pimp (which would be a redundant middleman in a state-approved brothel), pay for STD testing for the prostitutes, but would also pay for free Sex Ed classes for virgins. In real life, Chris tried to scam his way out of paying for sex with a Craigslist [[Chris and sex#Prostitution|prostitute]] (who was charging $100 for the hour) by telling her about the trolls, his life story, and his many personal problems. The prostitute hung up on him.

== On TV ==

In [[Mumble 6]], Chris discussed making a TV show called the Chandler show. One of his demands was the show should not have any commercial breaks, showing a distinct lack of understanding as to how a TV station makes money.

==See also==
*[[Monthly tugboat]]

==Sauce==
<references/>

{{Chris and}}

[[Category: Chris-chan]]

Chris and money

2010-05-04T04:41:40Z

BrokenDead89: /* But wait, Chris isn't employed! */ calculations

It's obvious that [[Chris]] himself has no grasp on the real value of '''money''', since he actively wastes as much of his [[monthly tugboat]] as possible on luxuries like [[Eye of Judgement|trading cards]], [[Officer Nasty|sex toys]], [[Duck|porn]], [[PS3|video games]], and, more recently, [[alcohol]]. He also once, when giving out the laws of [[CWCville]], equated 10 years in prison to a $1,500 fine.<ref>[[Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008]]</ref> He also equated 50 hours of community service to $500 (for any sexual violations).<ref>[[Mailbag_31#Magi-Chan_knows_when_you_fuck]]</ref>

Chris is a self-admitted impulse buyer. His [[PSN]] account shows that he's never played more than half of the games he's bought. And yet, astoundingly, he's still gone out of his way to buy ''all'' available downloadable content for ''every'' PS3 game that he's ever purchased, and he also further promoted his Sony fanboyism by later buying a Sony LCD HDTV for his bedroom which likely cost at least about $1,000-$1,500. All the while, Chris buys his [[Chris and fashion|clothes]] at second-hand discount thrift stores.

==But wait, Chris isn't employed! ==

Chris is what most would call a welfare leech. Chris's only source of income is the $800 [[monthly tugboat|"tugboat"]] that he receives from the federal government every month, placing his annual income at $9,600 a year. Chris's parents take $450 to pay for room and board.<ref>Miyamoto Saga</ref> In addition, Chris and his family get [[Wikipedia:Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program|SNAP]] money every month- more commonly known as food stamps.

{{quote|My father helped me get my Social Security set up; I get more a month than I could at a job. |Chris, completely deluded.}}

To put this in perspective, at the time of writing, minimum wage in the state of [[Virginia]] is 7.25 USD, pursuant to federal minimum wage. If Chris were to somehow do a complete 180 on his life and begin working a full 40-hour week, his monthly payment before taxes and payment for room and board would be approximately 1,160 USD. This would put Chris's annual income range, before tax, at roughly 13,920 USD. Subtracting what he pays his parents to live in filth monthly, as well as the 5% tax his income range mandates in the state of Virginia, Chris could very likely be left with a ridiculous 7,824 USD in ''spending'' money, as in, for more sex toys and video games. Contrast this with the 4,200 USD Chris pulls annually from the government after paying off his parents; it becomes clear Bob's encouragement of Chris's not seeking employment has ''nothing'' to do with money. He knows his son is a [[fail]]ure.

Chris strongly believes that by receiving and spending his tugboat on useless shit he is aiding the economy and paying for the tugboat of others.<ref>[[Mailbag 34]]</ref> This is complete dumbassery since sales tax goes to the state government and these "tugboats" are paid with federal payroll tax. Apparently, this is too complex for Chris's autistic mind. Where Chris is hiding the printing press to afford this discretionary spending is unknown.

Interestingly enough, while he has no clue how to handle money, Chris has an unhealthy [[Ego|fixation]] on his material possessions. In [[Vivitheg's AIM chat]], he stated that he did not want to sell any of his stuff; and in the [[Miyamoto Saga]], he refused to sell anything to help raise money for the trip to Redmond.

==Credit cards==
As surprising as it is that Chris has his own credit cards, it is equally unsurprising how unwisely he uses them. Chris has managed to rack up $2,000 worth of debt (according to [[Mumble 4]], 1000 of which comes from the PSN store, but this number has increased over the past few weeks) and has even stolen his parents' credit cards to use when his were maxed out. Being the greedy twat that he is, when Chris finally does make payments towards his debts, he always does so in the smallest installments possible, freeing himself to spend as much as he has (or more) on worthless shit, entirely oblivious to the fact that he's only increasing his debt by letting interest charges rack up. Economists are currently working on the theory that it is Chris's debts, not the collapse of financial institutions, which have caused the current global financial crisis.

==In the comic==
In [[Sonichu (comic)|the comic]] it is clear Chris has no idea how money works. [[Sonichu]], [[Rosechu]], [[Patti-Chan]], and most likely, all of the other characters live off welfare, just like Chris IRL. He seems to have no concept of tax, or that it's the American populace who pay for his [[Kimmi|bullshit]]. Sonichu and Rosechu are living in a two story house with an attic offered by the city and they are [[Mailbag 21#Home economics|"paid" in average]] of $3,500 a month just to hang around.

This, along with what else we know about [[CWCville]], could mean that Chris is a communist, or at the very least, a socialist. Of course, he's most likely too much of a retard to actually know what that means.

In [[Sonichu 9|Episode 19]], it's shown that CWCVille actually uses its own currency, in the form of C Quarters, W Quarters, and C Quarters. 10 C Quarters make up a W Quarter, and 10 W Quarters make up a C Quarter. Don't bother asking how that makes sense in any way, especially considering what the word "quarter" means.

==In other works==
Chris shows us his complete misunderstanding of the stress his ideas would put on the American Social Security system if he was left in charge of it in a text called "[[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas Story]]." This is where the idea of "Soup Hotels" came from.

{{quote|Even the homeless have a place to stay in the ten Soup Kitchens/Hotels. |Chris with a very bad idea...}}

So, what is a "Soup Hotel"? Chris describe it in the [[Mailbag 20]] as a building ten stories tall with 10 to 20 rooms per floor, equipped with single bathrooms, bed, lighting and Cable TV. Of course, the homeless will stay there for free. So, instead of building Homeless shelters with dormitories, commons rooms and shared TV sets, Chris think the homeless should be treated to all the comforts of a ''bona fide'' hotel. This means that, in CWCville, there're around 1000-2000 homeless people left outside. This might be the result of the local industry, chocked by heavy taxes needed to pay those social expenses, are unable to make a profit there and are moving away.

In [[Sonichu 10]], [[Ultra Sonichu]] and bevy of Rosechus stop at a soup hotel. The building is labeled Soup Hotel 17, implying that CWCville has had to open 7 new homeless shelters in the span of a month, or they're just bad at numbering the things.

In [[Mailbag 29]] he states that $10 an hour is a reasonable price to pay for sex with a prostitute. To show his further ignorance of simple economics, Chris proposed a chain of state-run brothels where this shockingly inexpensive fee would not only pay women for sex, pay the salary of a pimp (which would be a redundant middleman in a state-approved brothel), pay for STD testing for the prostitutes, but would also pay for free Sex Ed classes for virgins. In real life, Chris tried to scam his way out of paying for sex with a Craigslist [[Chris and sex#Prostitution|prostitute]] (who was charging $100 for the hour) by telling her about the trolls, his life story, and his many personal problems. The prostitute hung up on him.

== On TV ==

In [[Mumble 6]], Chris discussed making a TV show called the Chandler show. One of his demands was the show should not have any commercial breaks, showing a distinct lack of understanding as to how a TV station makes money.

==See also==
*[[Monthly tugboat]]

==Sauce==
<references/>

{{Chris and}}

[[Category: Chris-chan]]

Futurama

2010-04-28T13:21:57Z

BrokenDead89:

'''''Futurama''''' was one of [[Christian Weston Chandler|Chris's]] favorite shows from the Adult Swim lineup (now airing on [[South Park|Comedy Central]]), so he occasionally peppers his [[Sonichu (comic)|comic]] with material from it. While ''Futurama'' is a hit-and-miss sci-fi satire which can be enjoyed on multiple levels, Chris probably only watches it for the [[random-access humor]] and so he can [[Semen|mass debate]] to cartoon chicks.

==Stuff Chris stole from this show==
* A common gag in ''Futurama'' is the appearance of 20th and 21st century celebrities and other historical figures as cloned disembodied heads sustained in jars of murky fluid. This allows the writers to use guest stars who would otherwise be long-dead in the 31st Century, when the show is set. In ''[[Sonichu 4|Sonichu #4]]'', Chris battles the evil [[W-M-Manajerk]], who is basically the head of a nondescript man in one of these jars. His jar is mounted atop a powerful robot body, which looks suspiciously similar to one used by Richard Nixon's head in an episode of ''Futurama'' where he ran for President of Earth.

* ''[[Sonichu 7|Sonichu #7]]'' involves time-travel, and so [[Magi-Chan Sonichu]] creates a "time-sphere" which looks very much like the one employed in the direct-to-DVD film "Bender's Big Score". In fact, Chris and [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] spend their trip backward through time discussing the movie as though it were a scientific treatise on real-life temporal mechanics. The pair also discuss the episode "Roswell That Ends Well," and agree that the two fictional cartoons prove that one cannot alter the past to influence the future. Chris also references the binary code used in the movie to activate the time sphere, although this doesn't appear to be dialogue, or even connected to the plot of the issue.

* As if that weren't bad enough, Chris throws in Bender himself, one of the main characters of ''Futurama'', plunging through the time stream as Chris and the others pass by going the other way.

==External links==
*[[Wikipedia:Futurama|Wikipedia article on ''Futurama'']]

{{stub}}

[[Category: Things Chris has ripped off]]

Talk:Chris and censorship

2010-04-28T02:56:10Z

BrokenDead89:

If you're gonna write a Chris and... article, it's best to spend some time drafting it in your sandbox first.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 18:53, 27 April 2010 (UTC)

I don't know for sure that this article is entirely necessary. The censoring that Chris does do is largely in his Mailbag and YouTube comments, the latter really not being terribly unusual for any user, but indeed addressed in their respective articles. -[[User:BrokenDead89|BrokenDead89]] 22:20, 27 April 2010 (UTC)
*Perhaps. I just thought that this would be a rather interesting subject to cover, seeing as how Christian's Stalin-esque approach to censoring others' criticism often seems to get the better of him, both in his comics and on the internet. --[[User:EdtheHedgehog1894|EdtheHedgehog1894]] 19:55, 27 April 2010 (EST)
**I guess we'll have to see, although the sheer lack of content on this page doesn't bode well for the article's lifespan. I'm not sure how to go about adding anything to it that isn't covered elsewhere. --[[User:BrokenDead89|BrokenDead89]] 02:56, 28 April 2010 (UTC)

Talk:Chris and censorship

2010-04-27T22:20:47Z

BrokenDead89: