CWCki - User contributions [en]

Talk:F Abstinance

2010-03-29T17:43:06Z

CDiddles:

let me have a whack at transcribing something [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 23:13, 28 March 2010 (UTC)
:jesus christ now i know how you guys feel [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 23:31, 28 March 2010 (UTC)

Good luck making a summary of this one. He's raging about kids learning abstinence because he's a virgin, then goes on to say that the comics are bad but a small thing like a backpack is fine (even though he's not getting a dime). Great.... --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 23:36, 28 March 2010 (UTC)

:What's the source for the quote at the top of the page about the LBP costumes? --[[User:Hatredy|Hatredy]] 00:31, 29 March 2010 (UTC)

::It's what Chris put in the description box on youtube. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 00:35, 29 March 2010 (UTC)

==Still thinks he's in High School==
His mentioning getting up during an assembly makes me think we can confirm the theory he never left high school mentally. [[User:Shawths|Shawths]]

You just figured that out? --[[User:Exemplary|Exemplary]] 04:33, 29 March 2010 (UTC)

Oh I knew that just wanted to make a suggestion for some more evidence we can provide. [[User:Shawths|Shawths]]

Every time I am hearing the term "Assembly", it is somewhat linked to a church. Just sayin' [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 05:40, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
* I thought that myself. That suggests he recently had a sermon on abstinance. In this case it probably wasn't refering to the abstinance of priests, but trying to suggest to young people that it is a valid alternative to being sexually active. Which might explain Chris' rage, anyone suggesting to young women that NOT having sex is a good idea would be HIS ENEMY. -- [[User:Borednewb|Borednewb]] 06:08, 29 March 2010 (UTC)

== Sunday is video day. ==

He's been making a lot of videos on Sundays. I think last week someone at his church told him to leave the internet and this week someone at church told him to stop trying to rape people and to practice abstinence. I bet he just learned the word today.[[User:DamianAntaria|DamianAntaria]]
:Either that or a girl just used it as an excuse to flee his presence recently. [[User:Kazmeyer|Kazmeyer]] 01:17, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
:I also have the feeling that someone is preaching to our Chris. Is Rocky losing her grip on our favorite tub of lard? [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 02:41, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
::It doesn't really read to me like something from church. He's actively mad at the concept of abstinence, which leads me to believe that he feels like the concept cost him a shot at some china recently. Maybe that was the Wallflower's final excuse as to why she didn't want to give it up to him, or he tried to make a move on another girl and she explained that she'd taken a pledge or something. Either way, I think if he'd just been preached abstinence he might make a video about opposing it, but I doubt he'd sound so angry about it. [[User:Kazmeyer|Kazmeyer]] 03:05, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
:::[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stealing_First_Base This recent episode of The Simpsons may have something to do with it], though he's also probably still pissed about the Wallflower incident. --[[User:T K 19|T K 19]] 04:28, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
*It'd be interesting to get some statistics on Chris's videos - average length, the days he uploads videos on, time of day, that sort of thing. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 00:12, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
:* Yeah, that'd be a table worth putting together. A lot of them, it would be hard to peg what time of day they went up now because we're down to the CWCVille Library copies, but the rest of the data could be interesting. As for abstinence, just going on pure irrational bias about the content of sex education courses in semi-rural Virginia, he probably got an earful about it in high school, but he was also probably too busy reading Goosebumps to get too wound up about it at the time. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 00:16, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
:*Could this be next month's project then? --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 00:28, 29 March 2010 (UTC)

Ok, CWC has made 32 videos in 2010. 4 on Mondays, 4 on Tuesdays, 6 on Wednesdays, 3 on Thursdays, 5 on Fridays, 7 on Saturdays and only 3 on Sundays. So Saturdays seem to be the days Chris is most willing to make a fool of himself. [[User:DamianAntaria|DamianAntaria]]

== Another reason why I hate this mother fucker. ==

Seriously? He now wants people to rise up against abstinence? *Facepalm* If a girl doesn't want to have sex, then she '''doesn't want to have sex.''' It's a simple concept. He's just jealous that you can't get any china. Besides, any girl would want to proclaim abstinence around a creepy obese, greasy, sweaty, smelly stalking rapist like himself.

Ugh... I don't want to talk any more about this. I hope he gets pepper sprayed one day, though.

--[[User:Miss Noel|Noel Ari Paige]] 03:45, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
* I can't wait to see what two words get mashed together to describe ''that'' incident. "Jerk" don't really portmanteau with "girl" the way it does with "cop" and "manager." -- [[User:Revolver Octopus|Revolver Octopus]] 04:29, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
**Abstigirl? Bitchstinance? -- [[User:Borednewb|Borednewb]] 06:08, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
*** Bitchstinance. I love it. [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 09:27, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
**** He'll probably be making a Sonichu Special when that happens and portray the girl as an evil troll that wants nothing more to shatter his heart level to 0% by causing his poor heterochromic eyes unjust pain. (when in reality she was just defending herself from another "Megan" incident.) --[[User:Miss Noel|Noel Ari Paige]] 13:16, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
***** We know Chris feels he is "owed" sex by the female population. If that doesn't make him an outright rapist, he's at least a serious deviant, and a theoretical risk at best. -[[User:CDiddles|CDiddles]] 17:43, 29 March 2010 (UTC)

Talk:Sonichu 10

2010-02-25T07:44:29Z

CDiddles: /* February 25 page dump. */

==Continuity==
You know, my own theory is that Chris's fucked up numbering system finally managed to confuse Chris himself and/or he just lost track. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 18:40, 15 March 2009 (CET)

So, if the medallion never gave him power, that means that the entire Anchuent Prophecy is null in void, and none of the events following Sonichu entering the mystic cave could have ever happened.~[[User:gourmetpickle]]

Not to mention as well that it's obvious that the "high school ring" was just made up at the last second. If his high school ring gave him the power all this time, then why did he even have the retarded medallion in the first place? Speaking of the medallion, how did he obtain it before the Anchuent Prophecy if that was a key piece in the plot? It wasn't even explained WHY he decided "Hey, I'm gonna wear a medallion of a creature before the creature is even introduced everyday for no apparent reason!" Besides that, if the ring gave the power, why is the spot where his Sonichu medallion his weak point? Following the laws of most video games (knowing Chris abides by them), when you attack the source of power on a boss enemy, that is usually their weak point. I mean, does he not even care about the story anymore? GODDAMMIT CHRIS YOU'RE MAKING ME WORSE THAN YOU WITH MY RAMBLINGS. FUCK. --[[User:Wild Sonichu|Wild Sonichu]] 04:38, 6 May 2009 (CEST)

I find the idea of continuity in ''Sonichu'' comics quite upsetting. It was as if Chris had enough forethought to plan the whole thing. He was always impulsive over the whole storyline, mostly engrossed by a quest of pitiful revenge. I am ready to bet an old 5$ bill that, if he's called over the whole lack of continuity regarding the Anchuent Prophecy, he will just make the tribe leader appear on one page and say "No, that's cool". He's a crappy storyteller, that's all. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 21:05, 9 December 2009 (CET)

Well, he's all caught up with the pages and... it's funny. He didn't change the part where he sent his medallion to his "sweetheart", Blanca... despite the fact that he just set up a date with Lovely. LOL.--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 08:32, 22 December 2009 (CET)

Ya know, I just realized that his comics never had a plot up until Crystal got trapped in the mirror. Look over the comics and you'll find that this is the ONE AND ONLY ongoing conflict in the entire fucking "series". Everything else is resolved in one "episode" except for the Off target sub episodes, which was resolved in two episodes. Regardless of how little the comics after Crystal got trapped in the mirror focused on her, it's been completely about finding the Sonichu testicles to save her. Sure, he's taken the majority of the time she's been gone trying to "expand" upon his characters but like I said, saving Crystal stretched over five of his shitty comics.----rob

==Fun fact about Lovely Weather==
Chris thinks it's [[random access humor|fucking hilarious]] to sing (to the tune of "Sleigh Ride"): "Lovely Weather for a sleigh ride together with Lovely Weather for a sleigh ride together with Lovely Weather for a sleigh ride together with..." over and over. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 10:28, 9 December 2009 (CET)

*That sounds like a drag queen name. --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 11:02, 9 December 2009 (CET)
**I don't understand. I'm scared.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 16:20, 9 December 2009 (CET)
**I was going to say it sounds like a show dog name, but I think I like Anaconda's comparison better --[[User:TheyCalledMeMad|TheyCalledMeMad]] 18:37, 9 December 2009 (CET)
**Lovely Weather sounds like a name I'd use for a character... which disturbs me quite deeply. Also, any idea if Lovely Weather is based on a real person (again) or if Chris is making up a codename for a future sweetheart? [[User:EnsignDisposable|EnsignDisposable]] 05:26, 10 December 2009 (CET)
*** Page 2. He claims to have took advantage of the fact that he looks like his future self, and then fucked His future self's wife while his future self was at work. Yeah. --[[User:Beat|Beat]] 04:52, 10 December 2009 (CET)
**** This is the disgusting part. How creepy it is to have sex with your own future wife? And what about the whole Episode 19 "God-Jesus Says Ivy&Chris 4EVAH"? How pissed God should be that Ivy is dead and Chris's first thought out of the void was to tell all about the nookie he had with a married wife. Not much Christian values here ...[[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 05:35, 10 December 2009 (CET)
*** Also, this makes it that he's no longer a virgin in the comics, is the biggest single departure from RealChris yet. Even all his other victories were somehow unsuccessful in some way. [[User:EnsignDisposable|EnsignDisposable]] 05:26, 10 December 2009 (CET)
*** Chris understands time travel as Futurama presented it; X has always happened and/or will always happen. PresentChris took advantage of his future wife; FutureChris is this same Chris who 6 years ago took advantage of his resembling a married man to bed that man's wife. I guess Chris thinks it's justified because Lovely later married him. Just ''something'' about the whole situation is wrong, but due to the mechanics of time travel, pinning down exactly what is hard. --[[User:OFSheep|OFSheep]] 02:25, 11 December 2009 (CET)
::* But, that's the thing: In Futurama, it was the ''past'', not the ''future'' where it occurred. If I remember correctly, Fry had accidentally vaporized the man who he thought was his grandfather and ended up boffing his grandmother. He didn't realize until Farnsworth told him that HE was his own ''grandfather''. Chris essentially screwed up the entire premise by going into the future. He won't have any direct affect to his ''present''.--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 02:32, 11 December 2009 (CET)
::* Perhaps because she married the Chris of her present, not the Chris of 6 years previous? I mean, who you are as a person is a function of time; I don't really feel like I'm the same person I was 6 years ago. A lot has changed since then. The fact of the matter is that the Chris she took to be her husband wasn't the real Chris she knew and married. It may as well have been someone in a full-body Chris suit, because one would assume that the Chris of 2009 to be different in mind than the Chris of 2015, though, the ever-ignorant manchild... maybe that's not a good assumption. --[[User:Tristran|Tristran]] 02:37, 11 December 2009 (CET)
:::*I think that's why one could argue it's rape if past Chris presents himself as future Chris, as they could be totally different people. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 20:43, 16 December 2009 (CET)
:::* Try comparing Chris between now and when he started the comic and try seeing how changed he is.[/sarcasm, sort of] --[[User:CWCAttack|CWCAttack]] 02:45, 11 December 2009 (CET)
:::* More likely, Lovely Weather saw through Chris' deception but didn't care because future chris was fatter and completely bald. [[User:V3N0M1300|V3N0M1300]] 03:24, 1 January 2010 (CET)
:::* Or there was a kinky time-travel threesome between Lovely and both Chrises. It's not masturbation if it's sex with yourself. --[[User:Needlepants|Needlepants]] 17:47, 31 January 2010 (UTC)

==How to incorporate preview?==
Any suggestions on how to discuss the preview, since we'll be approaching the point where the preview is incorporated into the regular storyline? --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 20:43, 16 December 2009 (CET)

i say we merge it with the regular episode description once Chris Manages to reach it.

i'm sure that's what Chris will do anyway, and when the time comes to merge them we'll use the preview section as a Christory lesson on how he put up the preview, and what pages the preview took place in. --[[User:Homor|Homor]] 12:06, 17 December 2009 (CET)

== Japanese message ==

: A message in Japanese characters listed as a "controversial statement!" is seen to the right.
OK, I know next to nothing about Japanese. I punched "controversial" in WWWJDIC and it says 問題発言 is "problematical statement; controversial statement". Which kind of looks like the marks which Chris's artistic pencil left on the paper, hence scanned and uploaded and now troubling our retinas. Now, the question remains: Which episode of Excel-Saga was this ripped off from? I still haven't watched all of them. (And if it's not from Excel-Saga: sorry, ''I just got this weird feeling that it could be from there.'' I can't really explain it.) --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' ([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]]) 00:40, 22 December 2009 (CET)

The first episode. IIRC it's from Excel saying that manga artists are scum so who cares if they die, or something to that effect. Then, it was funny because it was prominent and after an actually controversial statement. Here? Pure, glorious shit. --[[User:OFSheep|OFSheep]] 02:32, 22 December 2009 (CET)

==Cogsdev is a gal-pal now?==

I... don't know what to think about this. --[[User:OFSheep|OFSheep]] 02:40, 23 December 2009 (CET)
*wut now? --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 14:22, 1 January 2010 (CET)

==Plagiarism to the EXTREME==

This is interesting... or not, but even still. It seems that Chris is really pushing the tracing deals to the extreme here. [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Image:SchuComic10P12.jpg|the picture of Chris-Chan Sonichu] was apparently [http://legi0n.789chan.org/cwc/res/9184.html|traced from a piece of Sonic fan art], as well [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/images/thumb/1/1f/SchuComic10P22.jpg/512px-SchuComic10P22.jpg| the first two fight "panels"] were ripped from a fight scene from the Archie Sonic comic "Super Sonic vs. Hyper Knuckles". Maybe I've missed some others earlier (basically scared to look back), but this is probably the worse I've seen Chris rip off stuff in his comic (in terms of scenes, not ideas). --[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 09:02, 27 December 2009 (CET)

== Popit tool. ==

I know no one probably gives a shit but the "beams" that Jason, Beel and Chris use are the popit tool from little big planet. It was tough to tell what it was until I actually played LBP and recognized that the menu Jason is fiddling with is the tool menu from the stage creation mode.

Cept Jason and Beel use a red popit tool, Chris uses a red one yet it is only blue in the games. Just pointing Stupid shit out guys. Happy new year.--[[User:Rob|Rob]] 09:50, 1 January 2010 (CET)rob

**Actually, the color it appears in the game is based on the color the player uses for their Sackboy. Conceivably it could be one of the many colors from the game, including red. It just happens to be red here because red is "evil" and Chris is a moron. [[User:Inkmonkey|Inkmonkey]] 00:08, 26 January 2010 (UTC)

==Page 29==
Chris looks so bored. Also, how little effort could this possibly take? Seeing this page just fills me with hate and anger.--[[User:OFSheep|OFSheep]] 16:45, 5 January 2010 (UTC)

==Pages 30-34==
God DAMN. I just ''love'' how Chris writes his characters ''not'' as actual characters, but as ''mouthpieces'' for his own self! I mean, look at Jason! In Issue 8, Jason says that he doesn't want to take down Chris's ED page and is willing to launch a pickle at Rosechu, yet here, he condemns Jack and Clyde for being homo trolls and decides to retire away. Then, BEEL, of all people, condemns THEM for being homo trolls! Then, Chris makes the two commit suicide, just like he wants them to!

Augh! So much rage!

On a side note, I love how Chris inserts that side note that he wants the MMPR team again and "disses" the other teams. Wow, way to live in the past, Chris! --[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 04:27, 6 January 2010 (UTC)

:*Chris always amaze me. I keep on thinking about how deeply retarded the whole comic is and, oh so suddenly, he finds a way to dig himself in a hole a lot deeper. I wonder how Clyde and Jack will react to this. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 04:31, 6 January 2010 (UTC)
:**I want them to make him ''really'' suffer for that. Otherwise, once he's done making Issue 10, I'm gonna go make my own comic in retaliation. --[[User:CWCAttack|CWCAttack]] 04:47, 6 January 2010 (UTC)
:***Sweet merciful Jesus, ''why?'' The last ten pages or so are probably the most disgusting things I've ever read (and this from someone who's read and lol'd at almost all of this wiki). They make ''even less sense'' than the typical Chris tract. I'm almost impressed at how in these ten pages he's managed to pack in so much fail. That's it, I'm making a comic where Naitsirhc is the hero and saves everybody. --[[User:SnorlaXBOX|SnorlaXBOX]] 05:24, 6 January 2010 (UTC)
:**** Hey, dipwad, I called it! Nah, I'm kidding, but mostly about the dipwad part. I got a good chunk of plot for my comic thought down, but I'd like to ask about your's first. --[[User:CWCAttack|CWCAttack]] 05:37, 6 January 2010 (UTC)
:*****I'll put the general overview in my sandbox. And @ Griffintown's post below: Reading these pages is pretty much like watching Chris jerk himself off. He's only doing it to satisfy some vague desire to be the big boy on the playground. --[[User:SnorlaXBOX|SnorlaXBOX]] 05:50, 6 January 2010 (UTC)
:****I just read them. The crazy thing is, I'll bet he actually considers this a victory. He's sitting in his room right now going "I showed those trolls a thing or two!" Ok, no, actually he's probably still frothing mad over mailbag 32, but the point remains.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 05:32, 6 January 2010 (UTC)
:*****That's it. CWCville is this magical place in his head where he can win all his battles. Chris acts as if his comics (and mostly everything he produces, videos and texts included) were Magical Talismans able to affect the real life. The best think that can happen right now is to see some serious "Clyde & Jack" action who will force Chris to "Undead" them in the next comic so he can beat them again. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 05:42, 6 January 2010 (UTC)
*Why does this remind me of the GI Joe episode where Cobra made a machine to destroy buildings with the power of rock?--[[User:Yawn|Yawn]] 5:50, 6 January 2010 (UTC)

==Page 36==
Rosechu is menstruating despite being medically sterile and being a Pokemon. Also, tampons and kinky sex in a TV-Y7 work. I don't know, I have trouble even thinking of the page without being filled with rage at the directions Chris takes his comic in. --[[User:OFSheep|OFSheep]] 04:55, 7 January 2010 (UTC)

==Page 37==
Christian... Freaking... Love... Day... I thought he was reaching the bottom in retardation but this is so... wrong. THIS begs to be turned into a "Gay Day" celebration. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 05:10, 8 January 2010 (UTC)
*It does! And what's so funny is that, Chris actually thinks that, if there WAS a cure for homosexuality, everyone in the world would be willing to go through this. Yes, I know this is Chris's world and we're just looking in, but still, this had to be said. First of all, vaccines are voluntary, not mandatory. If someone came up and said "Hey, we got the cure for homosexuality! Come and get it!", how many would take it? Not very many! Second of all, there's no real plausible way the cure could be passed through the water. That's only really in movies or comics! Water treatment plants have too many chemicals that would dilute or eradicate it. Besides, even if they did drink it, it has to be through the blood, not the stomach.

:I know, again, it's Chris's world, but I just had to get it out of my system. --[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 05:23, 8 January 2010 (UTC)

== oh boy! ==

After Jacks appearance in the comic, we should expect an epic phone call soon! -[[User:Briscoe|Briscoe]] 3:45 PM, January 8th 2010

==Page 40==

"Oh, Don't Worry, I am consentual." is now my favorite line in the whole frickin' comic. Because it's just... so wrong on so many levels. --[[User:Needlepants|Needlepants]] 16:16, 9 January 2010 (UTC)
*Add to this the "Lovely Weather will be my wife" angle and then you realize how twisted Chris can be. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 16:19, 9 January 2010 (UTC)
*Add this to the fact that, canonically in Family Guy, Meg gets a sex change in the future. --[[User:Morganna|Morganna]] 16:33, 9 January 2010 (UTC)
*I was weirded out by the Lovely Weather kinky time-travel sechs thing, but not as much as other people (Chris never did tell all the details, so for all we know, he could've told her, or FutureChris might have even been involved in a kinky time-threesome. The whole thing was unsavory to me, but I reserved judgment and wrote it off as Chris being Chris) ...but this, THIS is what shocked and made me sick, because previously, Comic-Chris never actually 'cheated' because his sweethearts either disappeared or died or whatevs; and I'm one of those people who think cheating (and ''unrepentant'' cheating at that!) is one of the worst things you can do in a relationship.

: [http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v322/puppet_chaos/whut.jpg The Medicine Seller probably would react the same way I did] Too bad I don't have a Sword of Exorcism. (...if you know what I'm talking about, you get a cookie made out of internet and win) --[[User:Needlepants|Needlepants]] 16:42, 9 January 2010 (UTC)
:*Someone should save those last few pages with Meg and all the pages where Lovely Weather is mentioned just in case Chris retcons either one of them. Unfortunately, atm, CWCipedia is fucking down again. --[[User:CWCAttack|CWCAttack]] 19:08, 9 January 2010 (UTC)
:**Godfuckingdamnit, 100mb, undown CWCipedia already! --[[User:CWCAttack|CWCAttack]] 23:00, 9 January 2010 (UTC)
:**Done! I am happy(er)! --[[User:CWCAttack|CWCAttack]] 02:59, 10 January 2010 (UTC)

==Page 42==
Pfft. I like that "apology". "I know I drew some very stupid and offensive pages, but I wanted to get through your DAMN DIRTY SKULLS that I'm STRAIGHT! Please, don't leave me!"

He starts to apologize, derails, then grovels. Epic Chris. --[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 05:51, 12 January 2010 (UTC)

== So meg was Silvana. ==

I'm sure Chris has some retarded plot planned around this, but the only thing that's really important is the fact that he just knowingly drew himself making out with a hedgehog that has a dick.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 06:18, 12 January 2010 (UTC)
* What surprised me is that he essentially subverted his whole Meg Griffin fantasy and more or less acknowledged that it was pretty messed up. It's a strange level of self-awareness. --[[User:Needlepants|Needlepants]] 06:46, 12 January 2010 (UTC)
**Of course it makes you wonder, why did Magi-chan just watch?--[[Yawn|Yawn]] 6:58, 12 January 2010
:* Maybe Magi-Chan just doesn't give a shit? He seems pretty lazy, judging by how much time he just spends doing nothing. --[[User:Needlepants|Needlepants]] 07:19, 12 January 2010 (UTC)

== Collosal Chris-Chan ==

Oh God, he actually used it. He actually used that horrible thing.

Two other things:
1. Page 43-44's transformation sequence is a direct ripoff of the Super Sonic/Shadow transformation before the final boss in Sonic Adventure 2.
2. Himself in panel 3 of Page 43, (the one where he's looking up), is sadly the best drawing he's done, anatomy-wise. (note the head isn't _too_ mishapen) --[[User:Needlepants|Needlepants]] 06:46, 12 January 2010 (UTC)

== Just noticed this ==

Magi-chan, on page 37, said that homosexuality and asexuality are extinct... but nothing about bisexuality. --[[User:Needlepants|Needlepants]] 17:27, 12 January 2010 (UTC)
:*My main theory on this is that Chris is ignorant of bisexuality. At the moment someone will ask the question, he will say something like "Yes, them too.". [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 17:59, 12 January 2010 (UTC)
** As someone who has spent some time in the South, for a lot of people bisexuality is syononymous with homosexuality. [[User:Inkmonkey|Inkmonkey]] 00:13, 26 January 2010 (UTC)

==Recent Pages==

Wow... the fail is overwhelming here. Zelina's just another vapid Rosechu, Chris actually thinks that people use their X-Box as fully functioning computers, he rips off a stage from the ''Shadow the Hedgehog'' game, he fails in website protection, he turns the Asperchu-type Sonichu characters into vapid, worshiping idiots who wanted real names, then strips them of what they had because he can.

Jeezus, Chris.--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 17:36, 19 January 2010 (UTC)

Note also that Chris sprouts a third eye after he jams his finger in the controller port. --[[User:Needlepants|Needlepants]] 04:32, 20 January 2010 (UTC)

Note also also that "Mitch Sonichu" looks like the [http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Uja7HbHJnMk/Sb8aG3Nr7gI/AAAAAAAAAHg/MUf8op1X4Xk/s320/brawny.jpg Brawny paper towel guy], an ambiguously gay lumberjack. Chris, for someone who swears up and down that HE IS STRAIGHT STRAIGHT STRAIGHT, has no problem whiling away his leisure time giving free, unsolicited homomasculine makeovers to random dudes. --[[User:SnorlaXBOX|SnorlaXBOX]] 04:53, 20 January 2010 (UTC)

== Christian is a God ==

According to page 57 that is. The Asperchu Sonichu comments on how Alec made him "worship a false God" (Liquid Chris), but apparently they worshiped Christian from before.

And now we have recolors of recolors.

Someone should also point out to Chris that Microsoft is also the creator of Windows, which is what he uses. -[[User:Scarf|Scarf]] 20:23, 19 January 2010 (UTC)

== What's the dating sim? ==

What's the Hex Bawx dating sim that Chris refers to? I haven't had dinner today and I can't find a darn thing on xbox.com — if there's one thing that bugs me about Xbox, it's that Microsoft has no idea on usability in certain cases =) --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' ([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]]) 12:48, 21 January 2010 (UTC)
:A game called "Don't be nervous talking 2 girls" link: [http://news.vgchartz.com/news.php?id=6182]. I wonder how he found out about this, I know in /cwc/ we were talking about showing this to him but nothing came from it. Makes me wonder if the autistic wonder is actually lurking on a better board than EDF. --[[User:Da-zen-man|Da-zen-man]] 21:53, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

== Pages 61-68 ==

Someone better get to summarizing these shit stains. I can't because I'm at school and can't look at them for more than a second each --[[User:T K 19|T K 19]] 21:47, 25 January 2010 (UTC)
* On it. [[User:Isarko|Isarko]] 22:07, 25 January 2010 (UTC)
** I summarized them, but some details aren't so great. I haven't read Moon Pals, nor all of Asperchu, and I have no idea who the blond chick is at that table. [[User:Isarko|Isarko]] 22:34, 25 January 2010 (UTC)

== President Obama? ==

It's August '08 during episode 21. Obama won't be president for 4 more months, and even then, I figure the economy is more pressing than Asperchu. Hell, the Asperpedia wouldn't be made until 2010, so Collosal Chris-Chan is raging at things that wouldn't happen for over a year. He just can't leave that soapbox alone!--[[User:OFSheep|OFSheep]] 22:21, 25 January 2010 (UTC)
* It gets dumber than that, Chris supposedly destroyed Asperpedia when he blew up the HEX BAWKS, didn't he? I'm amused that begging the president for intervention made its return. Its almost like a shout-out to the ED days.
* I want to send an email about this, but I'm afraid the Sysop's gonna reject it like she did the last three. --[[User:CWCAttack|CWCAttack]] 23:51, 25 January 2010 (UTC)
** What the hell? I sent in two, anyways. --[[User:CWCAttack|CWCAttack]] 00:15, 26 January 2010 (UTC)
*Holy shit I completely forgot that the comics weren't running on Earth Time! [[User:Inkmonkey|Inkmonkey]] 00:16, 26 January 2010 (UTC)
*Upon further analysis, Chris goes to ruin a person he's never even hinted at before for things that don't make sense unless you consider the metaphysical nature of Chris' existence as both creator and protagonist of his story and even then are incomprehensible to normal logic, that aren't told of until Chris has already done his damage. The actions of Alec and the rest of Asperpedia's crew, which barely make sense in the context of bothering fictional comic characters, are somehow worse than murdering at least 100 people and injuring hundreds more. These actions are horribly illegal and require the highest law in the land, while the aforementioned murder is somehow not a national security issue. Dammit, Chris. --[[User:OFSheep|OFSheep]] 02:39, 26 January 2010 (UTC)

== Fan art ==

We need some fan art of some of the events and characters in this comic. Currently it's a giant boring hunk of text, and that's not fun at all.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 01:04, 26 January 2010 (UTC)
* I was thinking of making a drawing of Collosal Chan as a blood-thirsty monster charging towards our poor heroes, Alec, Jack, Evan, Sean, Clyde, and Mao, as they hold their spots valiantly to stop him to causing any more bloodshed. The summary would be called: The whole plot of Sonichu 10! Lol! --[[User:CWCAttack|CWCAttack]] 02:49, 26 January 2010 (UTC)

==Allison's Problem==

Alright, I did a double check, but for reference, Allison's problem with Moon-Pals was that she showed up as a constantly happy girl (who's high on heroin). She appears a number of times, with Episode 17 being the more recent appearance (mocking Chris the whole way through). --[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 18:46, 28 January 2010 (UTC)

==Soup Hotel Rosechus==

Did anyone else notice that while Ultra Sonichu used Chaotic Remedy to cure the Aspiechus of Aspergers, he never even thought of using it to cure the Soup Hotel Rosechus? It seems that to Chris, Aspergers is a fate worse than being paralyzed from the waist down. Well, hot damn, by that logic, I should wish for physical paralysis! --[[User:Needlepants|Needlepants]] 17:47, 31 January 2010 (UTC)
*Well you can't have people running around out there with a similar condition to autism. They are stealing the limelight away from <s>true autistics</s> Chris. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 19:38, 31 January 2010 (UTC)

==Plot Twist==

If Chris were a decent writer, this is the part where I'd expect Mary's entire "Bawwww" story as an elaborate trick to get the all-powerful Hobo to free Graduon. But we know something like this won't happen.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 20:07, 3 February 2010 (UTC)

==Page 75==

Anyone noticed how Chris's blades are a God of War rip-off? [[User:GUInterface|GUInterface]] 08:44, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
*I think thats a coincidence. Chris hasn't even properly played Metal Gear Solid, I think its very unlikely that he would play God Of War. Although he'd probably like it if he did. If theres one thing that our Chrissy would love to do, its play as a God. Either way, thats not even my concern right now. What I would like to be highlighted, is that Slaweel surendered to him, told Chris that what happened was not entirely her fault, and even let him destroy Graduon and thus take away a large portion of her powers, and then he tries to kill her with two big swords. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 19:57, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
**And he said she'd never be forgiven. All because she did her job properly six years ago. - [[User:Liquid!|Liquid!]] 21:03, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
**Edward - Chris knows what God of War is. Apparently, the Field Trolls who got Chris to drink found that out through him. And the way the "blades" are drawn, those are Kratos' blades.--[[User:Blazer|Blazer]] 21:28, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
***True - It's mentioned in [[Chris's Big Night Out#Chris and His PSP|The PSP Video]] in [[Chris's Big Night Out]]. - [[User:Liquid!|Liquid!]] 23:11, 18 February 2010 (UTC)
***Sorry then. My mistake. I need to do more lurking by the looks of it. My point about Chris attacking Slaweel still stands though. She did literally just give up to him. Not to mention that she has not done nearly as much as some of Chris's other enemies. I seem to recall one episode about Blake stealing the Master Sunstone. That apparantly would have ended life as we know it and caused all sorts of mutations and shit. What about Beel? He was an assistant to Hitler. Graduon himself had tried to wipe out two old Native American clans. Hell, even the supposedly saintly Comic Chris, has done worse than Mary. He killed 200 people by blowing up a building, caused the Gay Holocaust. Even if we assume that interfering in his Love Quest really is the ultimate sin, then wouldn't Bagget and Jerkhief be the #1 offenders? Mary gave him a stern talking to, but those two had him arrested and put on trial.--[[User:Edward|Edward]] 00:44, 19 February 2010 (UTC)

==1-Episode Issue?==

I'm of the understanding that Chris limits each Sonichu issue to 100 pages maximum. Well, so far episode 21 has taken up over 3/4 of that limit. Is it safe to assume that once Episode 21 is complete, that'll be it for Sonichu 10? Because that would mean that the entire issue was basically a "clean-up" issue, in which Chris resolved just about every plot thread involving himself. If so, I think the article should reflect that a little bit more. At the moment it just talks about the circumstances of the preview's release. [[User:Xentrilus|Xentrilus]] 21:41, 18 February 2010 (UTC)

== Mass Effect 2 Joke ==

I find the joke a bit weak. I know people would say its a dating game, but Chris probably wouldn't even consider it, because he's only interested in getting a date in the real world, which I doubt Mass Effect would be able to teach him.[[User:Double Nega|Double Nega]] 00:34, 24 February 2010 (UTC)

== February 25 page dump. ==

I haven't read them yet. I'm not sure if I have the nerves of steel required for such a test of endurance. All I know is that they Torture Evan (Possibly for hours) before killing him.

Also, the torture involves castration. This is presented as an excellent coping tactic to help a young girl deal with the fact that her mother died before she was born.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 07:04, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

*It should be called "In which CWCville authorities detain and execute innocents with unwarranted cruelty". And I believe he was told to KILL and REMOVE Simonla, not kill her and then kill Mao, Sean, and Evan in the most contrived way possible. And after all those half-assed apologies, too! --[[User:Mikhail Faulken|Mikhail Faulken]] 07:14, 25 February 2010 (UTC)
**Honestly, I'm still shuddering at the Castrated, limbless Evan. Seeing that drawn in Chris's unique style... it's like an 8-year-old sketched a mutilated corpse and stuck it on the refrigerator. There's just something so fucking ''wrong'' about it.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 07:17, 25 February 2010 (UTC)
***If that were real life, the UN would have a field day with it. Somebody should make a fancomic where this unsavoury event is addressed and dealt with posthaste! Also, can't Evan take legal action for unwarranted use of his likeness? --[[User:Mikhail Faulken|Mikhail Faulken]] 07:20, 25 February 2010 (UTC)
****And sandy, is like 1 year old with the intelligence of a 4rth grader, She and her father killed evan in her comic, that's quite messed up, and kellie is about 10 and she's shooting chained people, and chris chan, using hellraiser kind of powers?The cherry on top of this cake is the whole love day speech after that.This is way, more revealing than the comic in which chris shot liquid. [[User:Basogn|Basgon]] 07:23, 25 February 2010 (UTC)
*****It just epitomises what we knew of the fat bastard the whole time: that he is a hypocrite. And apparently a bipolar one at that. I found the manner of how he carried it out to be extremely immature, like a retarded 4th grader... which is what Sandy is! Coincidences, coincidences. -- [[User:Mikhail Faulken|Mikhail Faulken]] 07:40, 25 February 2010 (UTC)
****** If we called Chris detached from reality before, that was an understatement. This just proves Chris is seriously sick. If any professional saw this I fail to see how Chris wouldn't be locked up. We've seen twisted stuff before, but this is easily the most monstrous. -- [[User:CDiddles|CDiddles]] 07:44, 25 February 2010 (UTC)
*did anyone noticed that the judge is bob? [[User:Basogn|Basgon]] 07:34, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

== Worth Noting? ==

The lawyer Marvey Blaziken in this comic was likely ripped off of Harvey Birdman (being as Blaziken is based off of a bird). He even has the same super-hero facial features that Birdman has. I'm not sure where this would go though.--[[User:AIDSandstuff|AIDSandstuff]] 07:06, 25 February 2010 (UTC)
:Add him to the list of characters and make a note on things Chris ripped off, I guess.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 07:16, 25 February 2010 (UTC)

=

Christian Love Day

2010-02-07T07:44:24Z

CDiddles: Redirected page to Examples of Chris's Ego#Christian Love Day

#REDIRECT [[Examples_of_Chris's_Ego#Christian_Love_Day]]

Talk:List of phrases Chris copied from media

2010-02-04T05:26:37Z

CDiddles:

I think we would be better off creating an article about the phrases Chris repeats endlessly, and then noting which ones he copied from TV. Covers more bases.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 14:20, 3 February 2010 (UTC)

* Not all of those are repeated endlessly, though. --[[User:Wtv|Wtv]] 15:36, 3 February 2010 (UTC)

This isn't a totally bad idea for an article, but isn't this something that could be included in [[List of things Chris has ripped off]]? Also, when you make an article, please try to use proper capitalization and whatnot. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 15:03, 3 February 2010 (UTC)

* Sorry. I think this deserves it's own article, because there is a lot of examples for this (they just need to be listed). I wouldn't call it ripping off something per se either, since it's perfectly natural to do this from time to time, it's just that chris does it a lot. --[[User:Wtv|Wtv]] 15:36, 3 February 2010 (UTC)

The "Grinds my Gears" phrase comes from an episode where Peter uses the phrase and becomes the "Grinds my Gears" guy, so half of an episode was devoted to Peter saying a catchphrase. --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 15:33, 3 February 2010 (UTC)
:If that's not a reason to hate family guy, I don't know what is.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 16:12, 3 February 2010 (UTC)
:If I remember correctly, Seth MacFarlane also said that was a phrase he ripped off from John Candy in "Plains, Trains and Automobiles". So, it's a rip-off of a rip-off. I don't know that it's worth noting, seeing as how Chris would be totally unaware, but yeah. That --[[User:CDiddles|CDiddles]] 05:26, 4 February 2010 (UTC)

== Renaming ==

Aside for correcting this for grammar, I think others have suggested this be given a more generic title, as television would be too narrow, not to mention I don't want to see things like "List of phrases Chris has copied from video games," "List of phrases Chris has copied from movies," "List of phrases Chris has copied from his parents," etc. Is "List of phrases Chris has copied" grammatically correct (I'm looking at you, [[User:Apostrophe|Apostrophe]])?

On an aside, the format is shit, needs something along the lines of [[Minor CWC-isms]]. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 21:13, 3 February 2010 (UTC)
*Yeah, I didn't think about that when creating. I've suggested this on /cwc/ and I agree "List of phrases chris has copied" works for me. Sorry about the grammar, I'm german. I did look at the minor cwc-isms article when creating this one and debating how to set it up but I think this is kind of hard to group alphabetically. but I guess I'll mess with it a bit. --[[User:Wtv|Wtv]] 22:46, 3 February 2010 (UTC)

Chris and reality

2010-02-02T11:25:27Z

CDiddles:

'''Reality''' is the universe from which [[Chris]] is quite detached. While most fiction operates on the assumption that the fictional world is in some way separate from that which actually exists, for Chris such lines are difficult to grasp. While some might assume Chris is exploring meta-fictional devices, he is nowhere near that clever. He's just too stupid to get reality straight.

==The mechanics of the CWCiverse==
As experts understand it, [[CWCville]] exists outside the confines of normal spacetime; a pocket universe with principal access located through a Narnia-esque portal made of a [[Wikipedia:Dance Dance Revolution|DDR]] pad in Chris's room (why he has a DDR pad in the first place when he has no coordination or stamina is a mystery). CWCville exists as a Utopia (by Chris's standards), located in Virginia, but not in any tangible sense. The geography of CWCville is incomprehensible by normal means, and it is speculated that only idiot rationale can make sense of this paradox.

Here it is important to remember that by Chris's standards, CWCville is 100% real. When confronted about it, he will acknowledge that CWCville is imaginary, but it is real to him.{{cite}}

In the comic — and within Chris's mind — the citizens of his imaginary universe operate with an understanding of the world outside their own. [[Sonichu]] was born of an unholy union and bizarre pseudo-scientific and fantasy bullshit (as in any good sci-fi story, radiation can do anything!) involving Sonic the Hedgehog, Pokémon, radiation, and a rainbow. He is also the fictional creation and figurative "son" of Chris (despite being of a different species), and is aware of this fact, referring to Chris as his "Father". Theoretically, this should also make Chris the "father" of [[Rosechu]] (and, in fact, Rosechu as well occasionally refers to Chris as "Father", or, more often, "Papa"), but either Chris hasn't given that much thought to the implications of what he writes, or he does not wish to dwell on the obvious [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|incestuous undertones]].

This duality extends to the sentience of CWCville's fictional inhabitants. They are Chris's inventions and act at his bidding, yet he often acts as if he believes they are real, self-willed beings: "I don't have to Justify Sonichu and Rosechu; they can take of that themselves."<ref>[[IRC (20 January 2009)]]</ref>

===Documentary or fictional fiction?===
[[Image:Chris-Straw.jpg|thumb|And you thought [[Oversized Drinking Straw of Fail|the straw]] was the worst part, just think of the implications...]]

Defining [[Continuity in the Sonichu comics|Sonichu Canon]] is a difficult prospect. [[Christian_Weston_Chandler_(comic_character)|Chris]] (the character) exists not only as Mayor of CWCville, but as writer of the comic depicting its own reality, his Mary Sue, and as creator of the universe. A given character exists in varying states of self-awareness. On one hand, Sonichu is having his real life adventures, but will at other times speak of discussions with fans, ''within continuity''.<ref>http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Issue_9/Page_38</ref>

It's not just the comics that define CWCville. Even Chris's spoken words have the power, in his mind, to reshape his fantasy world in a way that has lasting consequences. It was only with some reluctance that he obeyed [[BlueSpike]]'s order to declare [[BILLY MAYS]] the new mayor, and he subsequently wrote and drew entire pages of the comic intended to reverse the effect of what a sane person would consider meaningless nonsense.

In one sub-episode,<ref>[[Sonichu_4#Sub-Episode_7:_Christian_Chandler_in_.22Off-Target.22]]</ref> Chris incorporates his own misadventures into his fictional universe through the use of a [[Get-Tar Region|stand-in location]]. Within what can only reasonably assumed to be Chris's comic universe, Chris spends his time drawing his comic universe.

Things took an even sharper turn in the land of insanity with [[Sonichu 10]], where chris addresses the world of [[Asperchu]]. In the Asperchu series, the [[Chaotic Combo]] appeared, though with some changes (the most notable being that [[Wild Sonichu]] is now dating [[Simonchu]] instead of [[Simonla]], as per [[Evan]]'s wishes.) As the comic is hosted on its own wiki, with a regular update schedule, and with fans contantly pestering him about it, the comic essentially seemed as "real" to Chris as his own Sonichu comics. As such he felt the need, in his own series, to clarify that the characters in [[Asperchu|Alec]]'s comic were, in fact, a completely different set of Sonichus and Rosechus that were forced into imitating the Chaotic Combo against their will. Using [[Ultra Sonichu]], he "cures" them of their various problems (in particular, Asperchu's [[Asperger's Syndrome]]), and gives them all a makeover. At this point he then expects Alec to take these events as canon and completely change his own series to accommodate Chris's ridiculous ideas (similar to [[Sonichu 9]], where Chris recreated [[timmys1984]]'s fan promo, and expected the slight changes he added to be implemented to the animations).

It's entirely possible that Chris feels the need to recognize these other comics, because not treating them as "real" (in a sense), makes it more difficult for him to perceive CWCville as "real".

Chris himself, however, isn't above stealing other peoples' characters for his own nefarious purposes. In [[Mailbag 43#...well, this is disturbing!|correspondence with Evan]], Chris comes up with the mad concept that Simonchu (Evan's original character) had traveled to CWCville in an attempt to take his "sister" Simonla back to ECGville (Simonchu's hometown), but was defeated by Wild Sonichu. It's hard to tell what is more shocking: the fact that Chris felt the need to justify Simonla's fictional presence via the fictional conflict with Simonchu, or the blatant [[Chris and hypocrisy|hypocrisy]] in misusing another person's character to push his own agenda. The irony is that Evan's main question is if Chris thinks CWCville is real, which this diatribe answered very clearly.

Chris furthers his insanity in an update to his [[CWCipedia]] entry on [[Simonla]].

{{Quote|I had previously stated inspiration from Evan George's Simonchu Character; that was a fabrication, and I apologize for leaving the lie up for this whole time.

Simonchu was Never an Inspiration, or had Anything to do with Simonla Rosechu's creation whatsoever.

Thank you for being patient while I had thought further on Simonla's Background Story. | Chris, on [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Simonla_Rosechu Simonla]}}

Somewhere in his frustration with Evan's reasonable requests, Chris decided he could retcon ''real life'', by pretending to have forgotten he made up Simonla on his own. Why he had ever credited Evan in the first place is beyond question. Chris has the power to [[Chris and his Ego|dictate reality]].

===The fantasy===
It's clear to anyone with eyes that CWCville only exists as a crutch for Chris's warped psyche. While Chris feels the need to retreat to his womb-like room, he cannot totally withdraw from his need for social interaction. Therefore, CWCville becomes an extension of his personal world, more real to Chris than what he sees as a world out to [[Kick the Autistic]]. He retreats from a world where he has no control to a world where he has total control, a world defined by his whims. In his world, he can decide the laws and mores of the citizens. In his world, he can stalk and loiter to his heart's content.

While many children fantasize about being President or ruling their own city, as they get older, they realize that without the dedication, drive, and personality, it's not very fun having so much responsibility. For Chris, "responsibility" isn't in his vocabulary. All that the mayor does is have power, paying no heed to the well-being of the town's citizens, economy, or education. Just pure power. He set the rules and to hell with anyone who disobeys him. You know what they say about how power corrupts even the best people…

===Video games===
The CWCiverse is populated by video game characters. Sometimes, however, these characters ''know'' they are video game characters:

* [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]] dodging right and left with button presses in [[Sonichu Special 1]]
* [[Jiggliami]] referring to Blanca as "the [[Guitar Hero]] of this stage" in [[Sonichu 8]]
* [[Darkbind]] "leveling up with experience by practicing his swordmanship" in [[Sonichu 9]]
* …and let's not forget the whole confusing [[Yu-Gi-Oh!]] trading card game bullshit in [[Sonichu 5]].

Normally, the rule of thumb is that characters shouldn't break the fourth wall like this, unless the creators are ''deliberately'' making a series based on multiple crossovers. Chris can't decide whether he's making an ''original'' story, or one that's a deliberate and blatant mix of different source works. Most surprisingly, despite the fact that the characters are aware of their video game origins and video games in general, the characters seem oblivious to their sources of influence most of the time, and we only get an epic backstory for Sonichu, Rosechu and subsequently the Chaotic Combo. Just ''why'' doesn't Darkbind question which video games he was ripped off from?

We can conclude from the actions of the characters that, in a way, the CWCiverse works a bit like a terrible version of the old Saturday-morning ''Captain N'' cartoon and its comic adaptation, where it was taken as a given that all NES video game characters and settings occupied one larger meta-universe. Likewise, in Chris's world, it's a given that Sonic the Hedgehog's universe intersects the Pokémon universe and the universe of whatever else Chris decides to rip off. Instead of video game characters teaming up to defeat video game antagonists, though, we get a mixed-up bunch of character combinations and recolors fighting villains who themselves are character combinations and recolors; ''Captain N'' characters are the same as in the source material and instantly recognizable for any Nintendo fan, while Sonichu ''pretends'' to be original, and people are busy figuring out where the characters have been ripped off from. Instead of a Zapper and a cool NES controller belt that Kevin Keene had in ''Captain N'', Chris was handed a boring power to do absolutely everything, limited only by his imagination (and boy, does that ''ever'' limit things). ''And'' there's no Samus. ''And'' it's no longer the early 1990s, so this weirdness won't be tolerated anymore.

==List of confusion==

# Sonichu is both a fictional "creation" of Chris's and a sentient being that is able to communicate through Chris.
# [[Mary Lee Walsh]] was replaced by a not-evil [[Wikipedia:Doppelgänger|doppelgänger]] sometime in 2000 in our world, leaving her free to wreak terrible havoc upon CWCville. It should be noted that it doesn't appear as though the real Mary was replaced by the comic version in Chris' mind, but that that the Mary Lee Walsh Chris met at [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] ''was'' the comic version, who was later replaced in the ''real world'' with a second, good Mary Lee Walsh.
# Chris's car is a Transformer.
# Chris is the TRUE and HONEST mayor of his fantasy land, elections are not held because he founded the town,<ref>[[Chris-chan Discusses...]]</ref> so there's no need for them. He'll be damned if he's replaced.
# His [[Patti Chandler|dog]] is alive. As a [[Patti-chan|bipedal anthropomorphic cartoon character]].
# Sonichu and Rosechu seem to have two different lives: One within the pages and one outside the pages, as evidenced by their marriage and children.

==Outside of the comics==
Chris's shaky grasp on reality extends beyond the comic pages. Somewhat subtly, there is his tendency to exaggerate or grossly misunderstand measurements of [[Duck|length]], [[Patti Chandler|weight]], and [[I AM STRONG|strength]]. When [[Chris humps his PS3|bragging about the size of his junk,]] he seems to claim that his glans is of normal length and his testes outstandingly small. When trying to show off his strength and fitness, he thinks that everyday objects like [[Power|chairs]] and [[11042009 51 50|twelve-pack cans of soda]] have absurdly high weight, and that it's impressive he can even lift two twelve-packs of soda at a time, or lift an office chair, or do [[30 Push-Ups|thirty extremely poor pushups]]. He once claimed that Patti's dog house weighed five to ten ''tons''<ref>[[Father Call]]</ref> (and not in the hyperbolic use of the word), and that he managed to lift that. It seems to go beyond being incapable of measurement; he seems to think that since he's the hero, everything he does has some kind of epic element to it. Even Lord Byron would find this ridiculous.

To date, the most telling evidence of this is the [[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation|Sonichu Presentation videos]]. The majority of his babble in this video is just typical delusions of grandeur: Sonichu is a profitable concept, Chris could direct cartoons, etc. Near the end though, things take a turn towards scary.

{{Quote|CWCville Shopping Center does get built... And it has a Mayor's Office... right here, above the... front of—up above the main front entrance of the building...|Chris, suggesting CWCville Shopping center might actually be built}}

Even if we accept Chris's vision of a world where Sega, Sony, Nintendo, and Cartoon Network all get behind Chris and let him turn Sonichu into a gigantic cultural phenomenon, and if we accept the concept that the Sonichu craze will become so huge that a physical mall could be built in its honor, why would that mall need a Mayor's office? Just as a tribute to the series, or does Chris really think he's the Mayor of CWCville, in dire need of his office?

==Sauces==
<references/>

{{Chris and}}
[[Category: Chris-chan]]

Talk:Patti Chandler

2010-01-27T00:11:17Z

CDiddles:

is there any call for expansion of this article? i was considering trying to incorporate some current research on the relationship between autistic children and pet dogs but i don't know if there is really any point in doing so. relevant or no? -[[User:Phlegethon|Phlegethon]] 23:39, 26 January 2010 (UTC)
: If you can use it as an example of his disconnection with Humans, I'd say go for it. Depending on where you're going, I'd say it's worth a mention. The whole point is if it's interesting or insightful, it should be up. I think so, at least, but what do I know? [[User:CDiddles|CDiddles]] 00:11, 27 January 2010 (UTC)
==To do==
*Add picture, real and from comic
*Powers in comics
*Role in comic

==Merged==
I think this could be merged with the article [[Patti-chan]]. When I created the article, I was also going to include Patti-chan here but I guess someone else had other ideas. Any thoughts? --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 00:29, 14 February 2009 (CET)

: Well they're really seperate, it's like merging Chris-chan with chris chan sonichu Etc. I think they're different enough to be kept their own articles.--[[User:UncleBastard|UncleBastard]] 01:01, 14 February 2009 (CET)

::I like that there are two separate articles, but they're both so short it seems silly not to combine them. Patti-Chan's a bit player in the comics as it is, while the real Patti is dead, so there's never really gonna be anything new to cover. [[User:Dethchemist77|Dethchemist77]] 02:57, 14 February 2009 (CET)

:::Short of Chris digging the corpse up and re-animating it using Technix lego and pixel blocks. Which wouldn't surprise me if he did. :D--[[User:UncleBastard|UncleBastard]] 04:41, 14 February 2009 (CET)
::::In theory, we could always get more info about Patti Chandler the real dog but IMHO, there's far lulzier things to aim for and in any case, I think all of it can easily fit in one article. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 05:00, 14 February 2009 (CET)

==Nightmare Fuel==

Does anyone else suspect that ol' Chrissy fucked the dog? I wouldn't put it passed him.
* I'd like to say no, only because I think that dog had a poor enough time just hanging around with him. But, considering how he drew his saying goodbye to her in the comic... [[User:Dammerung|Dammerung]]
*If that were the case, then Chris wouldn't be the "virgin with rage" we all know and despise today. Unless he only conisdered her to be a ...O_O...Nevermind ._." [[User:EdtheHedgehog1894|EdtheHedgehog1894 ]]

==by the way she was delicious==
[[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 01:27, 18 January 2010 (UTC)

Talk:14 January 2010

2010-01-14T22:55:33Z

CDiddles:

"I am still a good individual human being."
AH HA HA, OH WOW. This should be Quote of the Day, I think. [[User:Orly444|Orly444]] 22:13, 14 January 2010 (UTC)

Agreed. Also, does anyone know what song that ringtone is, or is it just one of those default ones that come with the phone? I find it interesting that he has yet to upgrade from the 8-bit sounding ringtones that first came out to the ringtones that now actually play the songs. -[[User:Scarf|Scarf]] 22:30, 14 January 2010 (UTC)

He's been wearing that shirt for three days now. I can't imagine what it smells like. [[User:Popobawa69|Popobawa69]] 22:52, 14 January 2010 (UTC)
*Chris always wears his clothes several days in a row, as evidenced in ''several'' videos. This is nothing new or interesting.[[User:CDiddles|CDiddles]] 22:55, 14 January 2010 (UTC)

Talk:14 January 2010

2010-01-14T22:55:18Z

CDiddles:

User:Cchandlersonichu

2010-01-13T05:59:09Z

CDiddles:

faggot. [[User:ArizonaBay|ArizonaBay]] 05:52, 13 January 2010 (UTC)
* Is this the real deal? --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 05:56, 13 January 2010 (UTC)
* I was under the impression he was unaware/apathetic towards the CWCki. Whoever this is, however, is still a colossal faggot. Chris or otherwise. [[User:CDiddles|CDiddles]] 05:59, 13 January 2010 (UTC)

Christian Love Day

2010-01-08T18:10:00Z

CDiddles:

[[Image:Love-Day.jpg|thumb|250px|[[Magi-Chan]] describes Failmas, and expresses his severe disappointment with a startling lack of accuracy. ]]
'''Christian Love Day''' is a proposed holiday mused upon by Chris in the CWC blog entry of 7 January, 2010. It made an appearance in [[Sonichu 10]] on the same day. As described in the events of the comics, on 24 February, 2009 [[Magi-Chan]] completed his mission of distributing Chris's Gay Vaccine to the world. "Thanks to the blood of Christian Weston Chandler," all Homosexuality and (in a startling display of overkill) Asexuality are eradicated. Chris uses this as an excuse for a second Valentines day late in the month. Presumably, the day will be celebrated with unabashed, BUT STRAIGHT, monkey sex.

==Significance==

{{quote|Upon reflection, February 24 SHOULD be a Holiday of sorts (even a Second Day for Love in addition to Valentine's Day), because the day, to me at least, just FEELS like a Holiday, in addition to it being my Birthday. I have looked it up before, and it is some sort of forgettable (Holi)day in Mexico or somewhere. February 24 Should have More Significance and Recognition like a Holiday. |[[Chris]], in his [[CWC Blog]] for 7 January, 2010}}

Chris bases the holiday not only on his horrifically misguided and disturbing Gay Holocaust, but grants it full significance for [[Chris and his ego|being his birthday]]. Chris actually believes a milestone date in his amateur webcomic should be celebrated worldwide, because he "feels" like it should. He attempts to mask this fact with ill-researched hear-say. The "forgettable" holiday occurring on the 24th is [[Wikipedia:Flag_Day_in_Mexico|Mexican Flag Day]]. This is notable for being both a minor, yet notable holiday, doubly defeating Chris's point. On a historical note, it was the same day the [[Wikipedia:February_24#Events|Nazi Party]] was founded, way back in 1920.

[[Chris and Religion|Interesting to note]] is the celebration of a "man"(child) giving his "blood" to "save" the population of the Earth from "damnation". [[Chris and his Ego|Chris is a narcissist]]. Big surprise.

==See Also==
[[Chris and his Ego]]

[[Category:Comic]]

CWCki:Operation Knowledge

2010-01-08T09:14:24Z

CDiddles:

{{protip|Stuff from here goes onto the Common Questions page on the Cwcipedia. No frills. Just get the facts. Bill O Reilly said that. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 02:31, 29 December 2009 (CET)}}

[[Category:CWCki projects]]

Q: What are the worst movies you have actually seen, not just ones you've heard about and won't see?

Q: Why aren't you sure of the five worst games you've played? You can't have enjoyed every game you played.

Q: Do you like everything you see, so long as it doesn't have gay stuff in it?

Q: Why is "hand-drawn" superior to digital art? Almost all professional art nowadays is done in part or whole on computer.

Q: Do you like challenging games? Or do you prefer games which are easy?

Q: Sega and Nintendo were seen as rivals and enemies in the old days, but you had both Nintendo and Sega products. So why didn't you get into Harry Potter even as it "competed" with Pokemon? You know you can like both sides of a "rivalry."

Q: What do you think of Sonic the Hedgehog 2006? Most people think it's the worst Sonic game ever.

Q: What do you think is the best 2D Sonic game? Did you think Sonic & Knuckles "lock-on cart" idea was an awesome idea, or did you think it was a ''really damn'' awesome idea? :)

Q: What do you think of the often repeated claim that the new Sonic games are drifting away from what made the old games so good? Like, the addition of tons of new characters, and not focusing on running really fast?

Q: Who do you think is the best Sonic the Hedgehog voice actor so far? Surely not Griffith?!?!?

Q: Is there anything you don't like about Sonic the Hedgehog or Pokemon? If so, what is it?

Q: You don't seem to have very many RPGs. Why is that?

Q: We heard you had The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion. Out of curiosity, which artifact did you give to Martin in the main quest? It's an enormous game - how much of the game have you completed? And would you join us in demanding the DLC for Oblivion to be available for PS3 too? (Dang the Hex-Box owners!)

Q: You only seem to read Sonic the Hedgehog comics and superhero comics. If you want to be a comic artist, why don't you read more challenging comics? You can only get better by broadening your horizons.

Q: Would life be better if we reproduced nonsexually, and thus didn't have a sex drive?

Q: If you could change three things about yourself, what would you change? That's three qualities that you have, not three things other people do to you.

Q: Sex isn't that big of a deal. It's fun, but you don't have to have sex to be happy. Why are you so gung-ho about sex?

Q: If you could upload your brain into a robot body, would you?

Q: If you won 1,000,000 dollars in the lottery, what would you spend it on?

Q: If you went back to college, what would you major in? What classes would you take?

Q: If you could speak three foreign languages (besides Spanish), which would they be?

Q: Have you ever thought about getting your "curse" superpower scientifically verified? The power could be worth billions of dollars to the scientific community.

Q: If you were born a woman, how would your life be different?

Q: Why are lesbians morally superior to gays?

Q: If there were no women, and men could reproduce sexually with other men, would homosexuality still be wrong?

Q: If you had never thought of Sonichu, what kind of art would you be producing?

Q: If you knew you wanted to make Sonichu comics, why did you major in computer-aided drafting and design as opposed to an art major?

Q: Why haven't you sent proposals to a comics company yet? Comic companies look for completed issues before picking up a series, so since you've got 10 issues of Sonichu in the bag, you've got plenty to work with.

Q: Alternately, why not self publish on Lulu.com or similar? You could start selling Sonichu books immediately and make some money.

Q: Since you haven't been very specific about your taste in women, who are your favorite porn stars?

Q: Did you know that nearly all male porn actors start out making gay porn? What do you think of this?

Q: Have you met any other victims of "Kick the Autistic?"

Q: Why do you like the name "Reginald" so much?

Q: If you don't care about what gay people do behind closed doors, then why is gay sex illegal in CWCville? Furthermore, wouldn't Magi-Chan monitoring their sexual activity count as invasion of privacy, [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Privacy_laws_of_the_United_States#Constitutional_basis_for_right_to_privacy which could be seen as very unconstitutional]?

Q: What is your opinion on atheism? Seth MacFarlane, the creator of Family Guy, is an atheist, so it would be interesting to hear your opinion on the subject.

Q: In Sonichu 10, your song "Revive Zordon" calls for a reunion of the original Power Rangers team. Aren't you aware that such a reunion would be impossible, considering Thuy Trang (who played the original Yellow Ranger, Trini) died in 2001?

Q: As an anime fan with a certain opinion on homosexuals, what do you think of [http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/YaoiFangirl yaoi fangirls]?

Q: You've been quoted as saying that you're descended from Daniel Weston, who was a passenger on the Mayflower. However, there are no records of a Daniel Weston, or anyone with the last name "Weston" being on the Mayflower. Any thoughts?

Q: When you find a sweetheart and are ready to settle down, where do you plan to live? Will you continue to stay in your parent's house after Crystal is born?

Q: Have you ever considered getting your own apartment? What prevents you from doing so?

Christian Love Day

2010-01-08T05:27:21Z

CDiddles:

[[Image:Love-Day.jpg|thumb|250px|[[Magi-Chan]] describes Failmas, and expresses his severe disappointment with a startling lack of accuracy. ]]
'''Christian Love Day''' is a proposed holiday mused upon by Chris in the CWC blog entry of 7 January, 2010. It made an appearance in [[Sonichu 10]] on the same day. As described in the events of the comics, on 24 February, 2009 [[Magi-Chan]] completed his mission of distributing Chris's Gay Vaccine to the world. "Thanks to the blood of Christian Weston Chandler," all Homosexuality and (in a startling display of overkill) Asexuality are eradicated. Chris uses this as an excuse for a second Valentines day late in the month. Presumably, the day will be celebrated with unabashed, BUT STRAIGHT, monkey sex.

==Significance==

{{quote|Upon reflection, February 24 SHOULD be a Holiday of sorts (even a Second Day for Love in addition to Valentine's Day), because the day, to me at least, just FEELS like a Holiday, in addition to it being my Birthday. I have looked it up before, and it is some sort of forgettable (Holi)day in Mexico or somewhere. February 24 Should have More Significance and Recognition like a Holiday. |[[Chris]], in his [[CWC blog]] for 7 January, 2010}}

Chris bases the holiday not only on his horrifically misguided and disturbing Gay Holocaust, but grants it full significance for [[Chris and his ego|being his birthday]]. Chris actually believes a milestone date in his amateur webcomic should be celebrated worldwide, because he "feels" like it should. He attempts to mask this fact with ill-researched hear-say. The "forgettable" holiday occurring on the 24th is [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flag_Day_in_Mexico Mexican Flag Day]. This is notable for being both a minor, yet notable holiday, doubly defeating Chris's point.

[[Chris and Religion|Interesting to note]] is the celebration of a "man"(child) giving his "blood" to "save" the population of the Earth from "damnation". Chris is a narcissist. Big surprise.

[[Category:Comic]]

Christian Love Day

2010-01-08T05:22:53Z

CDiddles:

[[Image:Love-Day.jpg|thumb|250px|[[Magi-Chan]] describes Failmas, and expresses his severe disappointment with a startling lack of accuracy. ]]
'''Christian Love Day''' is a proposed holiday mused upon by Chris in the CWC blog entry of 7 January, 2010. It made an appearance in [[Sonichu 10]] on the same day. As described in the events of the comics, on 24 February, 2009 [[Magi-Chan]] completed his mission of distributing Chris's Gay Vaccine to the world. "Thanks to the blood of Christian Weston Chandler," all Homosexuality and (in a startling display of overkill) Asexuality are eradicated. Chris uses this as an excuse for a second Valentines day late in the month. Presumably, the day will be celebrated with unabashed, BUT STRAIGHT, monkey sex.

==Significance==

{{quote|Upon reflection, February 24 SHOULD be a Holiday of sorts (even a Second Day for Love in addition to Valentine's Day), because the day, to me at least, just FEELS like a Holiday, in addition to it being my Birthday. I have looked it up before, and it is some sort of forgettable (Holi)day in Mexico or somewhere. February 24 Should have More Significance and Recognition like a Holiday. |[[Chris]], in his [[CWC blog]] for 7 January, 2010}}

Chris bases the holiday not only on his horrifically misguided and disturbing Gay Holocaust, but grants it full significance for [[Chris and his ego|being his birthday]]. Chris actually believes a milestone date in his amateur webcomic should be celebrated worldwide, because he "feels" like it should. He attempts to mask this fact with ill-researched hear-say. The "forgettable" holiday occurring on the 24th is [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flag_Day_in_Mexico Mexican Flag Day]. This is notable for being both a minor, yet notable holiday, doubly defeating Chris's point.

File:Love-Day.jpg

2010-01-08T05:18:09Z

CDiddles: Magi-Chan clearly has little experience displaying emotion.

Magi-Chan clearly has little experience displaying emotion.

Christian Love Day

2010-01-08T05:14:17Z

CDiddles: Created page with ''''Christian Love Day''' is a proposed holiday mused upon by Chris in the CWC blog entry of 7 January, 2010. It made an appearance in Sonichu 10 on the same day. As describ…'

'''Christian Love Day''' is a proposed holiday mused upon by Chris in the CWC blog entry of 7 January, 2010. It made an appearance in [[Sonichu 10]] on the same day. As described in the events of the comics, on 24 February, 2009 [[Magi-Chan]] completed his mission of distributing Chris's Gay Vaccine to the world. "Thanks to the blood of Christian Weston Chandler," all Homosexuality and (in a startling display of overkill) Asexuality are eradicated. Chris uses this as an excuse for a second Valentines day late in the month. Presumably, the day will be celebrated with unabashed, BUT STRAIGHT, monkey sex.

==Significance==

{{quote|Upon reflection, February 24 SHOULD be a Holiday of sorts (even a Second Day for Love in addition to Valentine's Day), because the day, to me at least, just FEELS like a Holiday, in addition to it being my Birthday. I have looked it up before, and it is some sort of forgettable (Holi)day in Mexico or somewhere. February 24 Should have More Significance and Recognition like a Holiday. |[[Chris]], in his [[CWC blog]] for 7 January, 2010}}

Chris bases the holiday not only on his horrifically misguided and disturbing Gay Holocaust, but grants it full significance for [[Chris and his ego|being his birthday]]. Chris actually believes a milestone date in his amateur webcomic should be celebrated worldwide, because he "feels" like it should. He attempts to mask this fact with ill-researched hear-say. The "forgettable" holiday occurring on the 24th is [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flag_Day_in_Mexico Mexican Flag Day]. This is notable for being both a minor, yet notable holiday, doubly defeating Chris's point.

Chris and money

2010-01-08T04:53:23Z

CDiddles:

It's obvious that [[Chris]] himself has no grasp on the real value of '''money''', since he actively wastes as much of his [[monthly tugboat]] as possible on luxuries like [[Eye of Judgement|trading cards]], [[Officer Nasty|sex toys]], [[Duck|porn]], [[PS3|video games]], and, more recently, [[alcohol]]. He also once, when giving out the laws of [[CWCville]], equated 10 years in prison to a $1,500 fine. He also equated 50 hours of community service to $500 (for any sexual violations).

Chris is a self-admitted impulse buyer. His PSN account shows that he's never played more than half of the games he's bought. And yet, astoundingly, he's still gone out of his way to buy ''all'' available downloadable content for ''every'' PS3 game that he's ever purchased. All the while, Chris buys his clothes at second-hand discount thrift stores.

==But wait, Chris isn't employed! ==

Chris is what most would call a welfare leech. Chris's only source of income is the $800 [[monthly tugboat|"tugboat"]] that he receives from the federal government every month. Chris's parents take $450 to pay for room and board.<ref>Miyamoto Saga</ref>

{{quote|My father helped me get my Social Security set up; I get more a month than I could at a job. |Chris, completely deluded.}}

It appears that [[Bob]] encourages Chris not to get a job, as it would void his Social Security status. Bob's encouragement indicates one of two things: he knows his son is a [[fail|failure]] and wants him to stop trying, or he's instructing Chris on being a parasite.

Chris strongly believes that receiving and spending his tugboat on useless shit he is aiding the economy and paying for the tugboat of others<ref>[[Mailbag 34]]</ref>. Where Chris is hiding the printing press to afford this discretionary spending is unknown.

Interestingly enough, while he has no clue how to handle money, Chris has an unhealthy fixation on his material possessions. In [[Vivitheg's AIM chat]], he stated that he did not want to sell any of his stuff; and in the [[Miyamoto Saga]], he refused to sell anything to help raise money for the trip to Redmond.

==Credit cards==

As surprising as it is that Chris has his own credit cards, it is equally unsurprising how unwisely he uses them. Chris has managed to rack up $2,000 worth of debt (according to [[Mumble 4]], 1000 of which comes from the PSN store, but this number has increased over the past few weeks) and has even stolen his parents' credit cards to use when his were maxed out. Being the greedy twat that he is, when Chris finally does make payments towards his debts, he always does so in the smallest installments possible, freeing himself to spend as much as he has (or more) on worthless [[LittleBigPlanet|shit]], entirely oblivious to the fact that he's only increasing his debt by letting interest charges rack up. Economists are currently working on the theory that it is Chris's debts, not the collapse of financial institutions, which have caused the current global financial crisis.

==Debtors==

Based on current projections, it won't be long before the repo men are called in and Chris is forced to forfeit his [[PlayStation 3|shit]]. And considering that Chris has an unnatural obsession with his worthless crap we can expect a lot of BAWWWWING when the day comes. We eagerly await the inevitable inclusion of the Jerkollectors, or perhaps the Repo Gang, in future comics. Debt, like anything else that represents a challenge to his [[Autism|ignorant bliss]], is just another example of the world trying to keep him down.

If only he had taken money from the loan sharks, maybe then would they beat the crap out of his HFA ass <s>and teach him a lesson on the value of the dollar.</s> Nope, Chris would only continue spending and <s>maybe</s> definitely bitch about it on [[YouTube]].

==In the comic==

In [[Sonichu (comic)|the comic]] it is clear Chris has no idea how money works. [[Sonichu]], [[Rosechu]], [[Patti-Chan]], and most likely, all of the other characters live off welfare, just like Chris IRL. He seems to have no concept of tax, or that it's the American populace who pay for his [[Kimmi|bullshit]]. Sonichu and Rosechu are living in a two story house with an attic offered by the city and they are [[Mailbag 21|"paid" in average of $3,500 a month just to hang around]].

This, along with what else we know about CWCville, could mean that Chris is a communist, or at the very least, a socialist. Of course, he's most likely too much of a retard to actually know what that means.

In [[Sonichu 9|Episode 19]] it's shown that CWCVille actually uses their own currency, in the form of C Quarters, W Quarters, and C Quarters. 10 C Quarters make up a W Quarter, and 10 W Quarters make up a C Quarter. Don't bother asking how that makes sense in any way, especially considering [[Fail|what the word 'quarter' means]].

==In other works==

Chris shows us his complete misunderstanding of the stress his ideas would put on the American Social Security system if he was left in charge of it in a text called "[[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas Story]]". This is where the idea of "Soup Hotels" came from.

{{quote|Even the homeless have a place to stay in the ten Soup Kitchens/Hotels. |Chris with a very bad idea...}}

So, what is a "Soup Hotel"? Chris describe it in the [[Mailbag 20]] as a building ten stories floor tall with 10 to 20 rooms per floor, equipped with single bathrooms, bed, lighting and Cable TV. Of course, the homeless will stay there for free. So, instead of building Homeless shelthers with domitories, commons rooms and shared TV sets, Chris think the homeless should be treated to all the comforts of a Bona-Fide hotel. This means that, in CWCville, there's around 1000-2000 homeless people left outside. This might be the result of the local industry, chocked by heavy taxes needed to pay those [[Monthly Tugboat|social expenses]], are unable to make a profit there and are moving away.

In [[Mailbag 29]] he states that $10 an hour is a reasonable price to pay for sex with a prostitute. To show his further ignorance of simple economics, Chris proposed a chain of [[CWCville|state-run]] brothels where this shockingly inexpensive fee would not only pay women for sex, pay the salary of a pimp (which would be a redundant middleman in a state-approved brothel), pay for STD testing for the prostitutes, but would also pay for free Sex Ed classes for virgins. In real life, Chris tried to [[Chris and sex#Prostitution|scam free sex]] out of a Craigslist prostitute by telling her about his many personal problems. The prostitute then hung up on him.

==See also==

*[[Monthly tugboat]] - what Chris calls his welfare check.

==Sauce==
<references/>

{{Chris and}}

[[Category: Chris-chan]]

Monthly tugboat

2010-01-08T04:50:13Z

CDiddles: double dammit

[[Image:Monthly_Tugboat.jpg|thumb|right|What Chris believes a monthly tugboat is. Your tax dollars at work, gentlemen.]]

{{quote|yet AGAIN I am waiting for my next tugboat from my Social before I can even pay a Website to Host me and grant me a better .com domain name than sonichu.com|Chris to [[Miyamoto]], complaining about how long his free money is taking}}

The '''monthly tugboat''' is [[Chris]]'s euphemism for his [[Wikipedia:Social Security Disability Insurance|Social Security Disability]] check. Essentially, the United States government has a taxpayer-funded program to financially support disabled individuals who are unable to work-but many recipients are simply diagnosis-holders who choose not to work despite being able to do so. Like Chris. Chris receives $800 a month, with $450 going to his parents for room and board. The rest of it goes to either [[LittleBigPlanet|video games]] or [[sex toys|straight up his ass]]. However, $350 was nowhere near close enough to satisfy Chris's desire to purchase porn and video games. As of [[2009#July|July]], he has at least $2000 of credit card debt, including on cards he stole from his parents.

According to Chris in a recent [[Mailbag 34|mailbag]], he is not wasting his taxpayer funded tugboat because he is stimulating the economy and indirectly paying the tugboats of others. By Chris's [[ChrisAndReality|logic]], by purchasing his useless commercial goods, he is paying sales tax which the Government puts directly back into the hands of the needy. This is a tremendous leap in faulty rationalization, even for Chris, and he fails to elaborate on his shaky economic theories. If you thought he didn't understand money before, you ain't seen nothing yet.

On the advice of his [[Bob Chandler|father]], Chris doesn't get a job because the tugboat gives him more money overall. Your tax dollars at work, people.

==See also==
* [[Chris and Money]]

{{Template:Stub}}
{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:CWC-isms]]

Monthly tugboat

2010-01-08T04:49:42Z

CDiddles: dammit.

[[Image:Monthly_Tugboat.jpg|thumb|right|What Chris believes a monthly tugboat is. Your tax dollars at work, gentlemen.]]

{{quote|yet AGAIN I am waiting for my next tugboat from my Social before I can even pay a Website to Host me and grant me a better .com domain name than sonichu.com|Chris to [[Miyamoto]], complaining about how long his free money is taking}}

The '''monthly tugboat''' is [[Chris]]'s euphemism for his [[Wikipedia:Social Security Disability Insurance|Social Security Disability]] check. Essentially, the United States government has a taxpayer-funded program to financially support disabled individuals who are unable to work-but many recipients are simply diagnosis-holders who choose not to work despite being able to do so. Like Chris. Chris receives $800 a month, with $450 going to his parents for room and board. The rest of it goes to either [[LittleBigPlanet|video games]] or [[sex toys|straight up his ass]]. However, $350 was nowhere near close enough to satisfy Chris's desire to purchase porn and video games. As of [[2009#July|July]], he has at least $2000 of credit card debt, including on cards he stole from his parents.

According to Chris in a recent [[Mailbag 34|mailbag]], he is not wasting his taxpayer funded tugboat because he is stimulating the economy and indirectly paying the tugboats of others. By Chris's [ChrisAndReality|logic], by purchasing his useless commercial goods, he is paying sales tax which the Government puts directly back into the hands of the needy. This is a tremendous leap in faulty rationalization, even for Chris, and he fails to elaborate on his shaky economic theories. If you thought he didn't understand money before, you ain't seen nothing yet.

On the advice of his [[Bob Chandler|father]], Chris doesn't get a job because the tugboat gives him more money overall. Your tax dollars at work, people.

==See also==
* [[Chris and Money]]

{{Template:Stub}}
{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:CWC-isms]]

Monthly tugboat

2010-01-08T04:45:52Z

CDiddles:

[[Image:Monthly_Tugboat.jpg|thumb|right|What Chris believes a monthly tugboat is. Your tax dollars at work, gentlemen.]]

{{quote|yet AGAIN I am waiting for my next tugboat from my Social before I can even pay a Website to Host me and grant me a better .com domain name than sonichu.com|Chris to [[Miyamoto]], complaining about how long his free money is taking}}

The '''monthly tugboat''' is [[Chris]]'s euphemism for his [[Wikipedia:Social Security Disability Insurance|Social Security Disability]] check. Essentially, the United States government has a taxpayer-funded program to financially support disabled individuals who are unable to work-but many recipients are simply diagnosis-holders who choose not to work despite being able to do so. Like Chris. Chris receives $800 a month, with $450 going to his parents for room and board. The rest of it goes to either [[LittleBigPlanet|video games]] or [[sex toys|straight up his ass]]. However, $350 was nowhere near close enough to satisfy Chris's desire to purchase porn and video games. As of [[2009#July|July]], he has at least $2000 of credit card debt, including on cards he stole from his parents.

According to Chris, he is not wasting his taxpayer funded tugboat, because he is indirectly paying the tugboats of others. By Chris's [ChrisAndReality|logic], by purchasing his useless commercial goods, he is paying sales tax which the Government puts directly back into the hands of the needy<ref>Chris's response in Mailbag34</ref>. This is a tremendous leap in faulty rationalization, even for Chris. If you thought he didn't understand money before, you ain't seen nothing yet.

On the advice of his [[Bob Chandler|father]], Chris doesn't get a job because the tugboat gives him more money overall. Your tax dollars at work, people.

In a recent [[Mailbag 34|mailbag]], Chris revealed his belief that by being "on the tugboat" he is actually helping the economy and other people on welfare as well, though he fails to elaborate on his economic theory beyond that.

==See also==
* [[Chris and Money]]

==Sauces==
</references>

{{Template:Stub}}
{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:CWC-isms]]

CWCki:Operation Mailbag

2010-01-06T10:38:48Z

CDiddles:

{{protip|Operation Mailbag has been superseded by [[Operation Knowledge]]. Go there for details.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 03:58, 31 December 2009 (CET)}}

{{Email|From: Charles Darwin <cdarwin0100@gmail.com>

Hello Christian,

I have just finished reading your new comic book pages for Sonichu No. 10, and I must say that I am a bit shocked. I have a few questions that I'd like to ask you....

1. How can you justify the deaths of the thousands of people in the 4-cent Garbage building who you slaughtered when you demolished it? Your problems lie with Clyde Cash, not the ordinary hard-working people who only worked there to make a living for their family. Was this terrorist attack some sort of a sick, hackneyed attempt at a metaphor for the 9/11 terrorist attacks? Both yourself and Sonichu are mass murderers.

2. Why do you hate Jack Thaddeus so much? He may be a homosexual, but isn't he the person who is bankrolling the CWCipedia? Without him, you wouldn't have a website to host your comic books and hate speech. I think that it is certainly very ungrateful and un-Christian to wish death on someone who is your benefactor.

3. Speaking of Jack Thaddeus and Clyde Cash, I am very offended by your constant pleas for them to commit suicide. A very close friend of mine killed himself this summer and I'm still trying to get through it. How would you like it if your mother, father or one of your Gal Pals committed suicide? Making death threats isn't a suitable response for someone being a homosexual.

4. However, I must say that it is ironic that the exchange between Jack and Clyde in your comic before their deaths is the closest you've ever come to an honest and poignant moment in your comic. It's apparent that Jack and Clyde care deeply about eachother and act in a realistic manner. This surprised me. No, Christian, I am not inferring that you are a homosexual. I know that you are not.

I know that you have likened the sexual content and violence in your comic to classic tales such as Romeo and Juliet (which I assure you is not for children) and Family Guy, but including tasteless and horrific scenes of mass murder and suicide is out of line. Chris, I used to really enjoy your comics. I always liked how you had your own personal form of storytelling and artistry, but you've taken things to a new low.

Please give me a dignified response, and not just "whatever" or a hateful rant calling me a dumbass or yelling at me. I've written to you in a respectful manner, and I'd like to recieve the same from you.

Charles}}

{{Email|From: Tiffany Clarke <astrogal96@hotmail.com>

Hey Chris,

I like Sonichu so much that I've wallpapered my bedroom with printouts of your Sonichu comics. My parents don't like it that much but they're not the boss of me!!! BTW, when is Metal Sonichu coming back from the moon? I miss him!!!

Oh and I was wondering if you could settle an argument. My brother says there's no way there's life on other planets in this solar system, but I think it's totally possible, you know? Since you were on honor roll and stuff you'd probably know about things like this better than I would (I'm in 8th grade BTW) and you're my favorite comic book guy so I was wondering if you'd know. Is there life on other planets in this solar system? If so, what do you think it's like? If there is life on other planets, should we send people to check it out, or should they be regarded as hostile? I'm dying to know what you think about this.

Have a good 2010

Tiffany Clarke}}

{{Email|From: Stan Lee (excelsiorstanlee@gmail.com)

Hey Christian,

I've noticed several times in your mailbag responses that you have stated that Sonichu is a parody. How is that?

Wikipedia defines a parody as "A parody (pronounced /ˈpærədiː/; also called send-up or spoof), in contemporary usage, is a work created to mock, comment on, or poke fun at an original work, its subject, author, style, or some other target, by means of humorous, satiric or ironic imitation."

The best examples of true parody are films such as Mel Brooks' "Spaceballs" and "Young Frankenstein", and even the Family Guy Star Wars special. The Encyclopedia Dramatica page can also be considered a parody of you. Sonichu doesn't mock or ridicule Pokémon, Sonic the Hedgehog, Transformers, Family Guy, or Guitar Hero in any way. If Sonichu was, say, about an 'electric hedgehog Pokémon' that didn't have any legs, that would be a parody. The closest thing to parody in Sonichu are the sub-episodes which exaggerate your attempts to find a lover to a ridiculous level where you can defeat jerkops and turn into a hedgehog.

I must also say that I am offended by the tone that you use in your Mailbag responses. Almost all of the people who have taken the time to e-mail you are big fans of your work. Why don't you treat them with a little shred of respect instead of calling them dumbasses and disregarding all of the perfectly valid advice that people are trying to give you?

-Stan}}

{{Email|From: Vlad Tepes (emperorface@gmail.net)
Hello Christian Chandler.

I am the next in line to rule my father's country of New Sacea, which shares borders with South America, he passed away last week and I am to be crowned Emperor soon. Unfortantely he was a victim of war us our government has a law stating the Emperor has to take place in any fights as a soldier.

In our country Sonichu is heavily praised as one of the greatest works of fiction ever and a printed version is avalible in almost every New Sacean library. You are highly intelligent and by our scales even wiser than our greatest scholar, William The Sage. Perhaps, the same could be said of all Geinuses. We have made great technologic advances, much wealth, and many beatiful servant women, thus we are prepared to offer you a grand reward if you can help our people solve the following dilemma:

We are a God-fearing nation that hates those damned homos with all our hearts. These abominations unto God are so evil, they steal men's souls and make them their slaves! Unfortauntely, our empire does not have access to the means of curing the "Homo Gene", so all we can do is prevent their wrong lifestyle from spreading. Thus we execute them on sight.

However, our scholars are perplexed by the "Bi Gene" which gives one an interest in both genders, or in simplier terms they like both men AND women.

You see... I was very unfortunate to become contaminated with the foul curse of bisexualness myself! It was not by my hand that I was given that evil gene of bisexualness: it was brought by some homos, who wished to pay me tribute... Oh how I rue that cruel day!.. If bisexuals do indeed count as homos I must take my own life and let my straight sister rule in my place. For the good of my Holy Motherland!

But enough talk, Christian. Seeing as you are the smartest man in our kingdom's recorded history, maybe you can help me? Please tell me, Christian: should bisexuals be considered homos? Or are they just fine? What is a bisexual? A miserable little pile of evil homo genes? Or do they belong in this world? Am I a homo? Or a normal person?

Please, Christian, save our people by giving us your great knowledge of sexuality and genetics.

With much hope, Emperor Vlad Tepes The 3rd}}

I made two emails, one to question his opinions on bisexuals and one to find out just how bad of a strategist. In addition this will test to see if he even beat the game as he purchased 65 dollars of DLC for it, which would have been completely wasted had he not beaten it as you can only access the non-canon/dlc character during the end game. Also, to further test his stupidity, Almaz Von Adamite is a main character in Disgaea and Roy Mustang is a character from Fullmetal Alchemist who has never appeared in a Disgaea title. Seeing as Disgaea is a Strategy Game, I have my doubts as to whether or not Chris has even played the damn thing, let alone beat it. It amuses me greatly knowing he has less common sense than a turkey shoving things up his ass to make him look "too fat" for the hunters to kill.

{{Email|From: "The Engineer" (beecave656@buildersleagueunited.com)

Howdy, Mr. Christian Weston Chandler!

Folks at work like to call me The Engineer, and I suppose that's what I got my PhD for. Now, normally I don't truck much with video games and comic books 'n all that, but some of my co-workers are into that sort of thing and they called to my attention a lil' ol' mystery that goes by C.W.C. Accordin' to your website you say you've got a degree in Computer Aided Drafting and Design, and that somehow you managed to take ''six years'' in gettin' it. Now, not to be hostile just yet but taking six years to get a CADD degree is a little like not learnin' how to tie your shoes until you're in high school, architecturally speakin'. Most people in your position would be whippin' out PhDs and doctorates in the time it took you to get situated in CADD and spending that much time in gettin' it seems just plain egregious.

Now, I assume you got your reasons for taking that long, an' I trust that they're good reasons. Call it Southern hospitality. Nonetheless there's somethin' weird about this whole thing so let me just get a few questions offa my mind. Namely these questions are about that city you like to trump about, the one from your comic book, the one you call C-W-C-ville. You seem to think this city built outta Legos is real, you keep sayin' it's real when it's brought up, and yet you say, and I'm going to quote from you directly so there's no confusion as to why ''I'm'' confused, "the city and the mall Can Be Built and Dedicated."

First of all, last I checked things that don't exist yet are ''fictional.'' I got a PhD in quantum physics too (those teleporters ain't buildin' themselves) so I know for damn sure that if your city ain't built yet it sure as hell ain't real. You seem'ta built a little C-W-C-ville out of Lego, but a city of Lego ain't a city of tens of thousands of people. So, I suppose the first question is, "why do you think just wishin' it were real ''makes'' it real?"

Second of all I gotta wonder why you think an entire city built and named after a cartoonist is even vaguely possible. You're not talkin' something like Disneyland where a multi-billion-dollar megacorporation builds up a massive amusement park, you're talkin' about defictionalizing a city from a comic book, that is to say making it a real-live hundreds-of-thousands-of-people-big city. Named after you. A cartoonist. In my experience most cities get named after people who do things like win wars or kill a bunch of Indians. That means Question No. 2 is "why in the Good Lord's name would they build a city for a guy whose main contribution is drawin' a bunch of magic hedgehogs going on whimsical little magical hedgehog adventures?" Unless there's a bunch of won wars or dead Indians you ain't been mentionin'.

Last of all, I just gotta ask--why ain't you usin' none of that CADD work in your comic? I mean, the stuff you show is all done up in Crayola marker and ball-point pen, it's hideous. It makes my engineer's soul hurt. You spend six years gettin' that CADD degree and yet for some reason the Good Lord seems fit to withhold from us, you do your design not-on-computer. Seems to bypass the "computer-aided" part of that degree. I hate to see a fine education bein' wasted.

Anyhow, Chris, hate to bend you so harsh like that, but like I said, I'm a Texas man. We don't believe in holdin' back. Hope I got you some food for thought, and hope I can get a little clarifyin' on the subject.

No hard feelin's,
"The Engineer"
---
Builders' League United
Your first choice in discreet construction!}}

{{Email|From: [[Wikipedia:Stan (song)|Stan]] 'Sonichu's Biggest Gay Fan' Mathers (myteasgonecold@didomail.com)
Dear Chris,

You still ain't called or wrote, I hope you have a chance! I ain't mad - I just think it's FUCKED UP you don't answer fans!!!

If you didn't wanna reply to me outside your Mailbag, you didn't have to, but you coulda at least post a decent reply! You upset Matthew - that's my little brother man, he's only six years old! We waited in front of the computer screen for your reply, for hours, and you just wrote, "[[(INSERT WHAT CHRIS ANSWERS HERE)]]" That's pretty shitty, man - you're like his fucking idol, he wants to be just like you man, he likes you more than I do

I ain't that mad though, I just don't like being lied to! Remember when we met in the Poke'mon League - you said if I'd write you you would write back? See, I'm just like you in a way: I never liked those straight JERKS neither, they just always cheat on girls and beat them! I can relate to what you're saying in your comics, so when I have a shitty day, I drift away and browse them all, cause I don't really got shit else so that shit helps when I'm depressed... I even got a tattoo with your name across the chest!

Sometimes I even cut myself to see how much it bleeds - it's like adrenaline, the pain is such a sudden rush for me

See everything you draw about is real, and I respect you 'cos you tell it. My boyfriend's jealous cause I talk about you 24/7, but he don't know you like I know you Chris, no one does! He don't know what it was like for "Homos" like us growin up!

You gotta call me man, I'll be the Biggest Gay Fan you'll ever lose!

Sincerely yours, Stan.

P.S.: We should be together too <3}}

{{Email|From: [[Wikipedia:Stan (song)|Stan]] 'Sonichu's Biggest Gay Fan' Mathers (myteasgonecold@didomail.com)
Dear Mister-I'm-Too-Good-To-Call-Or-Answer-My-Fans,

This'll be the last message I ever send your ass! It's been [[(INSERT TIME INTERVAL HERE)]] and still no decent reply - I don't deserve it??? I know you got my last two letters, I typed the addresses on 'em perfect

So this is my last letter I'm sending you, I hope you read it - I'm in the car right now, I'm doing 90 on the freeway

Hey Chris, I drank a fifth of vodka, you dare me to drive? You know the song by Phil Collins, "In the Air of the Night", about that guy who coulda saved that other guy from drowning but didn't, then Phil saw it all, then at a show he found him???

That's kinda how this is, you coulda rescued me from drowning!!! Now it's too late - I'm on a 1000 downers now, I'm drowsy and all I wanted was a lousy reply or a call!!!!! I hope you know I ripped ALL of your drawings off the wall!!!!!!!

I LOVE YOU CHRISSSSSSS we coulda been TOGEHTER THINK about it YOU RUINED IT now I hope you CAN'T SLEEP and you DREAM about it and when you DREAM I hope you CAN'T SLEEP and you SCREAM about it I hope your CONSCIENCE EATS AT YOU AND YOU CAN'T BREATHE WITHOUT ME SEE CHRIS

SHUT UP BITCH!!!!!!! I'M TRYING TO FUCKING TYPE!!! Hey Chris that's my homo boyfriend screamin in the trunk but I didn't slit his throat I just tied him up see I ain't like you cause if he suffocates he'll suffer more and then he'll die too

...

Well, gotta go, I'm almost at the bridge now :) Oh shit, I forgot, how am I supposed to send this shit ou}}

^-- ''I chose to make "Stan" gay (er... gayer) because that raises the chance Chris won't answer the first letter, or will put it in a Rejected Mailbag, or will write a 3 words reply, or smth. along these lines. That would give me a chance to reenact the whole song. If you think I should better make him an Aspie to get that effect, say so, I'll change the letters. I suggest maybe the mods should post the letters in subsequent Mailbags, so that Chris won't forget "Stan".'' --[[User:GokuGetEm|GokuGetEm]] 13:12, 27 December 2009 (CET)

{{Email|From: Tor Go (iTaKeCaReOfThEpLaCe@manos.com)

Hello, Chris. Can you help me with a problem?

You see, at my workplace, there are a lot of beautiful women that I'd love to make my sweetheart, but my boss is such a cockblock (not to mention an egomaniac - he wants us to call him "the Master"!), and he won't let me go near them when he's around. Of course, he's done it with every single one of them, so he's a big hypocrite. Recently, we just hired a new woman I'm especially fond of, and I want to make it clear to the boss that I won't put up with his crap anymore by asking her out. However, I'm going to need your advice first.

1. We kind of got off on the wrong foot - I might have done a few things that creeped her and the rest of her family out (Oh, and the boss's dog attacked her poodle on my watch, but that wasn't my fault, I swear!). How can I make a better impression?

2. How soon in a relationship is it okay to touch her hair, shoulder, etc.? Do you think women like that?

3. What is the most romantic thing you can do with a woman? What's the most romantic think you have actually done with a woman?

4. My boss has been eyeing this woman's daughter lately, and, from what I've been hearing, he's going to hire her soon so he can get close to her over time, then start a relationship with her as soon as she's legal. I think that's creepy. What do you think?

5. Off-topic, but I was once in a movie that didn't do very well in theaters or with critics. Tell me, what do you think about critics? Do you think they're too mean, or just doing their jobs?

Well, I have to go take care of the place while "the Master" is away. Thank you!}}

{{Email|From: Mac Tonight (Moonman3k@gmail.com)

Hey Chris, my organization, the KKK loves your comic. We would like you to join. Basically we're a group that believes that Homos should try to become straight and that black boys should find black sweethearts and white boys should find white sweethearts. You may have heard a lot of bad things about us, but we only want to do what god wants us to do and love who we're supposed to. Our official chant is "KKK, KKK, KKK, KKK, KKK, KKK, KKK" we would be honored if you featured that chant and our official spokesman "Moon Man" in an issue of Sonichu. If you do this you will be fully inducted as a member of the KKK, which stands for "Kute Kitty Kat".

I have included an image of Moon Man, the KKK official spokesman, please include him in your comic.
 http://img189.imageshack.us/img189/272/moonmandrawingcut.th.png 
If you get fully inducted you will recieve the title of Electric Dragon
From Head Klansman, Mac Tonight }}

{{Email|From: Mary Lee Walsh (maryleewalsh@pvcc.edu)
Dearest Christian
I read your comics, perhaps I was wrong. You clearly are a creative genius, I feel really sorry for trying to stand in the way of your finding a girlfriend. I am so sorry. You added me as a villain which I thought was pretty cool, but then you renamed me "Slaweel Ryam" Chris, what I did to you was wrong, and although you may have forgiven me. I would like you to change Slaweel Ryam back to Mary Lee Walsh. Many of the faculty read your comic and I used to brag about how I was included in it. Anyway Chris, I give you full permission to use my name for the villain. Just call it a little something for me, okay?
With Love, Mary Lee Walsh}}

A test of his gullibility and knowledge, plus Slaweel Ryam is inredibly stupid.

{{Email|From: Lady Dr. Ashmere Caladbolg (hillsplittingblade@resurrectionlabs.kvx)

To Mr. Chandler:

Is Lady Dr. Ashmere Caladbolg. You have not heard of me. Am not one to be heard of. But am sexologist from distant land not-to-be-named. Our is secret study. Name assumed for secrecy (this name is not mine from birth; name theme chosen for achievement in life). Allowed research outside for sanity purpose given secret kept. Apologies poor English. Translation software poor on computer. I must ask question. Question useful to study. Would be happy with answer.

(One) Is note you use porn "Educational Purpose." Is funny you do so Mr. Chandler. Pornography not educational. Pornography like action movie. Bruce Willis shot at ten thousand time, is not hit once, is jump through glass uncut, is "kill helicopter with car." Not to be learned from. Impossible in real life. Pornography same. Strange acts, strange position not intimate but interesting to see on film. Impossible conditions, strange fetish to be shown common. Not like real sex. Real sex not have crew, director, hours between shot to keep strong. Why consider porn education, Mr. Chandler? Is strange.

(Two) You say you are not gay. I believe you say truth, believe you like women. But what you say is not listened to because you say it always, always. Seem like you are hiding untruth. Others hear, think you are gay, trying to hide for fear Society. Seem very easy to anger, Mr. Chandler. Would have been better to say nothing. Have said everything. Are disbelieved. Is ((superiority comedy)) to them. Why be angry Mr. Chandler? Respond to everything with anger. Anger never work. Why every time claimed gay, you correct loud as possible? Solves nothing, makes only worse.

(Three) Hear that your penis is bent, like elbow, like beast of Loch Ness. Painful condition Mr. Chandler. Is to be corrected. Is not normal. Make sex-with-woman difficult. Am hear you receive ((mercy payment)) from government; why not save for operation? Would make Mr. Chandler Penis mighty and vigorous. This you want, yes? Why is not done?

Would help. Would help Lady Dr. Caladbolg, who splits the hill with her blade. Would help much Lord Dr. Caliburn, who rests in stone until pulled free. Would help much Lord Dr. Durandal, who even mountain cannot break. Would help Lady Dr. Curtana, whose blade yields to mercy only.

--RESURRECTION LABS
"Durch das Leiden, zu den Sternen"}}

Felt like writing in a funny voice, really.

{{Email|From: Yuji Naka (Yujinaka@sonicsega.com)
I am the president of the Sega Corporation, Yuji Naka, and I wish to inform you that Sonichu infringes several copyrights. I understand that Sonichu is under the protection of Parody law and is a humorous parody of Sonic The Hedgehog, for which I applaude you. But your use of Dr. Ivo Eggman Robotnik, Sonic The Hedgehog, Amy Rose, as well as Giavonni (from Pokemon), Optimus Prime (from Transformers) cannot be tolerated. If you wish to sell your product you must refrain from using these characters as well as rewrite the plot to exclude uses of them. You do not own them and no self-respecting company will be found using other people's characters. When Robot Chicken makes a parody, they purchase licenses to use those robots and when Family Guy or Simpsons includes an external character they change the design in order to make it forgein to the original property. Thus they are no longer in fault. Notice the South Park episode "Chimpokomon" which uses non-pokemon characters to poke fun at Pokemon, the name is similar so you can still tell what it is parodying, but had Pikachu been in it they would have been sued instantly.

To restate my previous statements, Sonichu, Rosechu, Blake, and Slaweel Ryam, all fine with me. Robotnik, Giavonni, Sonic, Optimus Prime, and Amy Rose... I am afriad you'll have to get the proper concent of Sega, Nintendo, and Bandai to continue displaying images of these characters. Failure to do so will result in a lawsuit. I can already tell you that no one at Sega authorized Sonic, Amy, and Eggman's inclusion. I don't know if Bandai or Nintendo did, but if you wish to gain licenses to Sonic The Hedgehog to continue showing the images with the characters, you will have to ask Sega Of America.

Good day, you have three months to get the licenses or remove all images containing Perfect Chaos, Amy Rose, Sonic The Hedgehog, and Dr. Ivo "Eggman" Robotnik.
before you recieve a cease and desist.
Sega Of Japan President, Yuji Naka.

PS: I am pleased with your work, and believe that if you ask our licensing department you should have no problems getting the rights to Sonic, Amy, Robotnik/Eggman, and Perfect Chaos.}}

{{Email|From: Andrew Ryan (andrewryan@rapture.net)
Hey Chris. I've been a fan since sonichu was first released and I'm glad to be writing you. I am impressed with the way you have led CWCville. However, I have a question. Who are your favorite porn actresses?}}

Ironically, Andrew Ryan would have an aneurysm if he ever heard about CWCville's "Soup Hotels." But mainly I just want him to be more specific about his taste in women.

{{Email|From: Joseph Goebbels (JGoeb@3rdR.gov)
Dear Christian:

I am a government worker, and I have given some thought to your stances on homosexuality in CWCville. It occurs to me that the stamping out of the gay community could be accomplished in four simple steps.

First control the media in the city. It would be rather simple to install a V-chip in all major signal recievers in CWCville so that no Objectionable Content could reach the citizens. This will also serve to keep them docile.

Second, expand Magi-chan's police force. Create a special task force comprised of sonichus that can work quickly and efficiently, as opposed to the slower police force, which is bogged down with protocol. You could call this the "Sonichu Squad", or 'SS' for short. They report directly to Magi-chan, and when a homosexual is located, the SS can round them up and place them in a Correction Camp, where their will can be systematically broken and reshaped into something you personally deem more 'kosher'. You can also put them to work while in these camps so that the camps pay for themselves. And for the truly unrepentant homos, they can be given permanent jobs cleaning the smoke stacks around the city.

Third, a campaign of misinformation against the imaginary 'homo gene' can work wonders. If people can be convinced of the ridiculous notion that a simple sneeze or sharing a coke can turn someone gay, people in the city will be too frightened to even talk to one another, allowing you to consolidate your power for the final step.

Finally, when the community is about to self-destruct, begin to distribute a 'vaccine' for the gay gene. While this is obviously just snake oil, since no chemical cure for a desire can possibly exist, but in their panic, people will accept what you tell them and heil you as a hero. Never again will you have to worry about impostors or elections. The populace will follow you to any lengths.

I hope this plan helps you with your current predicament.

Joseph Goebbels.}}

{{Email|From: Lyla Gowan (lilyonthepond@neural.net)

Dear Chris,

My name is Lyla Gowan. I have something important to say to you. I don't think you're gay, but I know why people keep saying you're gay: you act like what people think gay people act like. You like little-girl pop music like Britney Spears and the Backstreet Boys, you like girl's toys like My Little Pony, you like wearing sports bras. These are all meant for girls and women, but because you like them it makes you look like a stereotypical gay guy. And then you go on about how gays are evil and need to be reprogrammed and these people think you're a self-hating gay man who wants to erase gays so you don't have to think about it.

I don't think you're gay, but I do think you need to see what things are like from our perspective. I'm a lesbian, Chris, and I have to live with oppression every day.

You gotta understand that gay people suffer a lot. We're hated because we break with how men and women are "supposed" to act. People that are uncomfortable with that like to quote the Bible at us out of context and use that to beat us down. We're alone and hated all over the world. It's terrible. It's like 1960s America, and we're all black, and the law is against us and lots of the people are against us and every step forward we take seems like it's followed by a slip two steps back. The difference is, we can pretend to be someone else, pretend not to be gay... but it's all just pretend. It hurts. You believe in truth and honesty, but the way things are, we can't be true to ourselves, honest with ourselves, just because we're different. The world doesn't want us to be who we are.

You suffer like us. You're different and people hate you for that. But then you go and hate us because ''we're'' different, or because you don't want to be lumped in with us and made more different. You don't seem to realize that people hate us for the same reasons they hate you. We're ore alike than different. Like I said, I don't think you're gay just because you like My Little Pony and stuff. The same people that hate gay people for who they are also hate people like you because they think what you do is "gay." Gay people who see you act like a stereotypical gay while also hating gays think you're some kind of closet case, and so they make fun of you. Mostly I think they're out of line, but when you keep saying things like "gay people need to be reprogrammed," that just makes my heart sink and I start to wonder if you deserve it for being so mean.

You keep linking that old cartoon, but you don't take its message to heart. You don't like when people say you're gay just because they think you fit what gay people look like. But you hate gays for the same reason! You think that being gay is "unnatural," so you think they should be fixed--that they're not really bears, just men in fur coats, and that their fur coats can get taken off and they'll fit right back in. But you'd just be hurting them just like other people have hurt you. It's a sad and sick situation and it hurts me to think just because some people call you gay that all gays have to go. Every day I wish the world would accept us for who we are, and even though you could be helping us and helping yourself, you just keep lashing out at people who are like you.

I just want you to know that I think you should be free to be yourself... but I wish you could think the same of me, Chris, and the same of people like me. I hope you can understand us more, Chris. I hope you do.

Love,
Layla Gowan.}}

{{Email|From: Jacob N. (jacob_n333@hotmail.com)

Good day, Chris!

There are two things I must relay to you. Firstly, I must say I'm a little disappointed that you will "carry on" with your plans for Simonchu even after the copyright fiasco you went through lately. Just as a warning, you might be in for more if you don't go through with Evang-y's wishes for his character. He does still maintain the copyright to the character, seeing as how there was no formal agreement to transfer rights. Be wary of that.

Second, and more important... You pride CWCville on being a democracy, part of the good ol' USA, right? The thing is, in your recent mailbags, you've done all in your power to portray CWCville as, to quote one of my history major friends, a fascist magocratical dictatorship operating on American soil. If CWCville were to exist in real life exactly as it exists in the comic, the United States would almost certainly declare war to reclaim its land and citizenry, and I'm not sure how Sonichu would fare against the might of the US military, especially in a setting where they are certain to field powerful superhumans. Let me explain in detail.

One: There are no elections. You've said this repeatedly. You are the mayor, and that's it. The country was founded on the belief that no one ruler should reign for life, that the people may democratically elect who they wish. Further, the idea that one man could always win 100% of the votes is ridiculous--dictators like Saddam Hussein have repeatedly cheated the system that way, sometimes not even bothering to hide it, so they can claim they rule a democracy even though there's no real democratic rule at all.

Two: CWCville has its own coinage. Every city in the United States, everybody in the United States, uses the same kind of currency. I can think of one exception: slaveholders who paid slaves with their own personalized "voucher" currency only usable on their own property, so that slaves could never escape the life they were forced into. Seeing as how, for example, your vending machines only take C- or W-quarters, and there are no other units of currency used in the comic...

Three: CWCville has no free will. This is utterly damning. Your recent revelation that Magi-chan constantly reads the minds of the entire populace means that, in essence, nobody has any freedom. You're violating the most basic freedom afforded by nature, the freedom to think as you will and be who you are, even if you have to hide it. For someone who's gung-ho on truth and honesty, you don't seem to notice you've taken the freedom to be true and honest from your population.

Four: CWCville has its own stand on federal violations. Sex with a minor in CWCville, according to you, is punishable by either a 500 dollar fine or 50 hours community service. In contrast, the punishment from the United States is a minimum five years and up to a maximum of 30, and fines ranging from tens of thousands of dollars to hundreds of thousands... and many people think this isn't nearly ENOUGH punishment! In contrast, your punishment is barely a slap on the wrist. In fact, it's barely an annoyance. Even with a psionic prevention system, CWCville would be the child rape capitol of the United States.

Five: CWCville is ruled by the superhuman. Apart from the "vice mayor" Allison Amber, the entire legal system of CWCville seems constituent of superhuman individuals who have near-godlike power compared to baseline, non-powered humans, and Amber is able to dispense these beings at will. There is no real way the people can possibly fight back or defend themselves should the government go rogue--and seeing as how it's criminalizing thoughts, it's well past the time to rebel.

CWCville isn't a city in Virginia, it's an Orwellian hellhole ruled by a dictator-for-life and patrolled by a small army of decadent living war machines. Clearly this isn't what you meant... but the way you've got it right now, CWCville is much, much more evil than the PVCC. No wonder the PVCC is more popular than the Chaotic Combo.

The good news is that the most damning problem is the Magi-chan mind-reading network, and you haven't integrated that into the comic yet. The rest are unfortunate implications--strongly hinted at in the subtext, but possible to reverse if you start damage control. With a little work, you can make CWCville seem not so unspeakably horrible.

Yours in writing and in the Cherokee nation,
Jacob Nathaniel Lights-in-the-Sky}}

{{Email|From: Stephen Strange <sorcsupremeDoc@gmail.com>

Hello Christian

I've taken great interest in your character Magi-Chan Sonichu. However, your recent statement that he spends his time monitoring the thoughts of CWCvilles citizens disturbs me. You see, Magi-Chan possesses a powerful gift, and if I may speak frankly, this gift is wasted on such trivialities. There are unspeakable horrors lurking on the edge of reality, ready at any second to prey on those unsuspecting of their great evil. These are the forces, the mere mention of whose vagaries test the sanity of even the most sound and rational minds, which demand the constant vigilance of one whose abilities are such that they can be driven away. Magi-Chan is that one. He is by far the most important and powerful of all Sonichus, and as mayor you are squandering his tremendous talents on the whim of your sexual insecurities.

Without speaking too much of my business, I feel you must redirect Magi-Chan's efforts away from such diversions, and let him get back to his all-important occupation. Don't you feel that the security of CWCville relies upon more than preventing recreational sex between consenting adults? Using him in the manner you do is a vulgar waste.

The forces of cosmic unbalance are at your doorstep, Christian. I pray you may keep them at bay.

-Dr. Stephen Strange}}

File:Whatsgoingon.JPG

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CDiddles: uploaded "File:Whatsgoingon.JPG"

[[Category: Art from Sonichu 6]]

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CDiddles: uploaded "File:Getahintchris.JPG"

[[Category: Art from Sonichu 5]]

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CDiddles: uploaded "File:AltSonichu4.jpg"

A fanart of sorts.
[[Category:Chris-Chan (fanart)]]
[[Category:Mary Lee Walsh]]
[[Category:Crystal]]
[[Category:Jerkhief]]
[[Category:Jerkops]]

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[[Category: Art from Sonichu 4]]

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Dedicated to Sarah Nicole Hammer

Sonichu 2

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CDiddles: uploaded "File:Chrisansestore.jpg"

Chris's Imaginary Ancestor.

[[Category: Art from Sonichu 2]]

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CDiddles: uploaded "File:Myspacehacked.jpg"

After his myspace was hacked :D

File:090-CWComicalHug.jpg

2010-01-04T04:56:18Z

CDiddles: uploaded "File:090-CWComicalHug.jpg"

[[Category: Scrapbook images]]

File:Cwcyehameha crop.gif

2010-01-04T04:53:55Z

CDiddles: uploaded "File:Cwcyehameha crop.gif"

Slightly cropped and reduced version of the Curseyehamahawhatnot dongle.

File:Captain's Log.jpg

2010-01-04T04:52:07Z

CDiddles: uploaded "File:Captain's Log.jpg"

File:Wild Snergen Flergen.jpg

2010-01-04T04:51:02Z

CDiddles: uploaded "File:Wild Snergen Flergen.jpg"

RANDUM = FUNNEH

File:Autobiographical.jpg

2010-01-04T04:50:11Z

CDiddles: uploaded "File:Autobiographical.jpg"

File:Nodarkies.JPG

2010-01-04T04:48:28Z

CDiddles: uploaded "File:Nodarkies.JPG"

[[Category:Chris-Chan (fanart)]]

File:ECP 00024.jpg

2010-01-04T04:47:56Z

CDiddles: uploaded "File:ECP 00024.jpg"

File:0242-CWC&VarsityBBallTeam97Color.jpg

2010-01-04T04:47:27Z

CDiddles: uploaded "File:0242-CWC&VarsityBBallTeam97Color.jpg"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Waterboy

[[Category: DVD slideshow images]]

File:Lynch to the supreme.jpg

2010-01-04T04:46:04Z

CDiddles: uploaded "File:Lynch to the supreme.jpg"

[[Category:Chris-Chan (fanart)]]
[[Category:Sonichu (fanart)]]
[[Category:Sonichu 0 Cover Parodies]]