CWCki - User contributions [en]

Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)

2017-01-04T12:16:54Z

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{{Articleofthenow}}
{{DeadLinks}}

[[Image:DVDReleaseCut.jpg|thumb|Because making a homemade DVD about yourself justifies your existence.]]

'''''Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)''''' is [[Chris]]'s famed homemade DVD, featuring various video clips Chris had made before his Internet fame, and his actual, if meager, TV appearances. Despite its title, only two videos on the DVD were ever shown on TV.

Chris originally sent copies of the DVD only to a select few people, but nevertheless thought him making the DVD was an [[Chris and his Ego|important enough achievement]] to mention repeatedly in the [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'' comic]] and elsewhere. He also believed that people would actually be interested in buying a copy along with other merchandise, and even planned a [[Sony|Blu-ray]] release.<ref>[[3 December 2009]]</ref> Suffice to say, the disc was actually burned with a Magnavox DVD recorder out of material that appears to have been transferred off of aged VHS tapes, and doesn't actually approach commercial quality, even if it actually had any interesting content that people would actually pay for. Chris possibly thinks that lack of content and video quality that was abysmal to begin with will mysteriously look better when burned on [[Sonichu 10|hi-def]] discs.

Naturally, since this relic was so profoundly ''important'' in Chris's mind, the [[trolls]] had their curiosity piqued greatly over it. Eventually, a copy was obtained by [[LordSillynipples]] by posing as Chris's childhood friend and first crush, [[Tiffany Robinson]].

After the [[Destruction Of Chris's House|fire]], it seems likely that the original copy of the DVD was destroyed, however Chris announced its first official public release in 2016, suggesting either the DVD survived the fire or he downloaded the torrent.

==Tracklisting==
===''C.W.C. On TV'' Trailer===
To reduce marketing costs, Chris put the trailer for the DVD directly into the DVD. He also uploaded it to YouTube on 5 November 2007. The trailer provides an 8-minute summary of the rest of the features, in case you don't want to melt your brain by actually watching the whole DVD. His YouTube description:

{{quotebox|This is the Trailer of my Limited Distributed DVD. More videos are avilable on [[YouTube#Chris's other video site--Veoh|www.veoh.com]]. Enjoy.}}

===[[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|C.W.C. Super Sonic Winner!!!]]===
From 26 February [[1990s#1994|1994]], shortly after Christian's 12th birthday. Anchormen and women on ''[[Wikipedia:WVIR|NBC 29]] [[Wikipedia:Dateline NBC|Dateline News]]'' report him winning a ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog]]'' contest and earning a $1,000 shopping spree for video games. The pinnacle of Chris's entire existence to date, this event fueled the delusional manchild he is today.

===[[Song of Christian]]===
Filmed on 15 May [[1990s#1998|1998]], when Chris was 16. Presented as an episode of ''The Christian Chandler Show'', Chris gives a dramatic reading of a poem he wrote about himself. He then spends 20 minutes explaining the meaning of each line, about 15 minutes of which is dedicated to him leafing through his [[hand-drawn Nintendo Power magazine|hand-drawn ''Nintendo Power'' magazine]], and the rest dedicated to him raging over the fact that the poem [[Honor roll|got him an "F" in school]].

===[[Mario Kart 64 Lego Raceway#Prototype|''Mario Kart 64'' LEGO Raceway Prototype]] Animation===

===[[Mario Kart 64 Lego Raceway|''Mario Kart 64'' LEGO Raceway]] Animation by C.W.C. on Game Boy Camera===
Filmed on 4 June [[1990s#1998|1998]]. Hey, do you like ''Mario Kart''? Do you like Lego bricks? How about stop-motion animation? More importantly, do you like hearing the same 15-second clip of music played over and over and over while you watch grainy black-and-white 8-bit footage of LEGO men getting into car wrecks? Have we got the clip for you. By the way, LEGO Chris wins the race. [[Chris and his Ego|No surprises there.]]

===[[The City of Cwicville Tour!|Unfinished CWCville Tour]]===
Filmed 12 July [[2000s#2001|2001]]. Lego Chris gives a tour of his Lego town, passing by 2 landmarks before the video abruptly ends.

===[[Chris Chan in the PokéNews]]===
[[Image:SlamAttack.jpg|thumb|OH BOY!]]
Filmed 16 October [[1990s#1999|1999]]. An anchorwoman on [[Richmond]] [[Wikipedia:NBC|NBC]] affiliate [[Wikipedia:WWBT|WWBT]] does a fluff piece on the rise of the ''Pokémon'' fandom. Chris, aged 17 and older than the playing crowd featured, happens to be among the small children playing the game, and although not discussed he is lingered on for a little while. This clip provides the DVD cover with its money line:

{{quote|I'll send out my Dragonair, even though it has 60 Damage on it. Oh boy! It has 3 Energy on it... Slam Attack!}}

===Christian Chandler's [[Animal Crossing Documentary|''Animal Crossing'' Documentary]]===
Filmed 22 November [[2000s#2003|2003]]. Chris makes an hour-long video of him playing ''Animal Crossing'' for the GameCube, that's about as exciting as watching [[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!|paint]] dry.

===[[The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special|C.W.C.'s ''Animal Crossing''/''Mario Paint'' 24th Wedding Anniversary Special]]===
Filmed on 7 June [[2004]]. Chris plays ''Animal Crossing'' again in honor of [[Bob]] and [[Barbara]] Chandler's anniversary.

===[[So Need a Cute Girl|"So Need A Cute Girl" Music Video]]===
Filmed 20 [[2004#December|December 2004]]. Chris sings both the lead single off [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (band)|his debut album]] and a special Christmas tune in this music video.

===Chris Chan's [[Harvey Birdman commercial|''Harvey Birdman'' Commercial]]===
Filmed 24 February [[2005]]. Here is Chris's attempt to win a contest, whose goal is to deliver a creative advertisement for a ''Harvey Birdman'' DVD. The time constraints laid out are obvious, as Chris crams 50% info about himself, ''Sonichu'', [[random-access humor]] and Mary Lee Walsh, and 50% info about the DVD into a thirty-second "advertisement".

===Chris Chan's [[Pixelated PS3]]===
Filmed on 28 November [[2006]]. Chris enters another contest requiring him to shill a product in under a minute, this time a PlayStation 3. To answer the question "What would you do for a PS3?", Chris first explains everything he would like to do but won't (e.g., save up the money and go to a store), and would but can't (forsake a cure for autism), before revealing that he has constructed a PS3 from Legos and [[Pixelblocks]].

===C.W.C.'s SlideShow of Photographs, Art, and Comics===
Chris films images taken from [[1980s#1982|1982]]-[[2007]], while simultaneously playing a self-made [[KCWC broadcast|radio broadcast]] from 1998 which gives new insight into his past, in one audio channel.

===[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]]===
Filmed 24 February [[2007]]. Closing the DVD, in celebration of his milestone 25th birthday, Chris delivers an address summarizing the lessons he has learned in his life and how they should be applied by future generations of "ladies and gentlemen and dudes of all teenages."

==Great Director's Cut==
After the DVD was leaked onto the internet, Chris claimed<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate September 29th, 2009]]</ref> that the trolls didn't have the "Director's Cut", which includes footage of Chris's [[Christmas]] from [[Christmas#2004|2004]] and takes from the [[Pixelated PS3]] commercial. The trolls long thought that the "Director's Cut" was just a bluff he used to save face. That was, until [[December 2014]], when it was revealed that [[Catherine]] acquired a copy and handed over some footage to a Kiwi Farms member to upload to YouTube, thus proving its existence.

He later told [[Regina]] that he had a "Master Copy" with over ''6 hours'' of tedious crap.<ref>[[Regina e-mails]]</ref> The fate of this version after the events of [[Destruction_Of_Chris's_House|10 January 2014]] is unknown.

===[[ChandlerFamilyChristmas2004|Chandler Family Christmas 2004 parts 1 & 2]]===
Filmed on 25 December 2004. Chris videotapes footage around the house while discussing C-Mas. Notable for being made when the hoard was in its infancy.

===[[ChrisAfterChristmas2004|Chris After Christmas 2004]]===
Filmed on 25 December 2004. Chris bitches some more about [[gal-pal]] [[Sarah Hammer]] and the continuation of his [[Love Quest]].

==Possible Sequel==
In an email to [[Cole]], Chris expresses his intention to create a new DVD "around (his) 50th or sooner"<ref>[[Cole Smithey E-mails]]</ref>. So far, this sequel has not materialized as of [[2017]].

In early 2016, Chris announced that he would be giving the DVD its first official public release from his [[Etsy]] page, including a bonus disc of content filmed between 2007 and 2010.<ref>https://www.etsy.com/au/listing/266568164/christian-weston-chandler-yep-im-on-tv</ref>

==Images from the Physical DVD==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:062-CWCsDVD.jpg|Cover.
Image:DVDReleaseCut.jpg|The cover of the release edition.
Image:063-2-CWCDVDWholeMaster.jpg|And the Director's Cut Edition.
Image:063-1-CWCsDVD Label.jpg|Even DVD labels cannot be spared from the horror.
Image:ChrisDVDCD2.jpg|We asked for a "disc image". The torrent went up later, but this was delivered as a cop-out.
Image:CHRISDVD.jpg|Parental Advisory - VERY HONEST content.
Image:ChrisDVD3.jpg|Chapter menu, complete with Magnavox DVD/VCR styling.
Image:CHRISletter.jpg|Letter to troll who received DVD.
Image:Chrislist1.jpg|''Chandler's List'' - It's like ''Schindler's List'', except you'd want to be sent to a gas chamber.
Image:Chrislist2.jpg|'''Spoiler:''' Most of these people went to school with Chris and probably have no idea who he is.
Image:Chrislist3.jpg|And here's the last page.
Image:Chrispaper1.jpg|"Now I'm even more perverted, sexist, and homophobic."
Image:Chrispaper2.jpg|People who Chris couldn't find pictures of to include - consider yourselves lucky.
</gallery>
</center>

==Sources==
<references/>

==External links==
* [http://thepiratebay.se/torrent/4433832/Christian_Weston_Chandler..._Yep__I_m_On_T.V.___)_DVD Torrent of the DVD]
* [https://ia601502.us.archive.org/11/items/C.W.C.YEPIMONT.V./C.W.C.%20YEP%2c%20I%27M%20ON%20T.V.%20-%29.ISO ISO of the DVD]
* [https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLwPTVCCc1YkC9VRrXzUhtrX-9Unbb9ijS The entire DVD on YouTube.]
* <s>[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/dvd/ Contents of DVD slideshow.]</s>
* <s>[http://www.megaupload.com/?d=EL8AHJ8P Slideshow download.]</s>

{{CWC on TV}}
{{Relics of Fail}}

[[Category:Relics of Fail]]
[[Category:Arts and Crafts]]

The Alpha Trion/"Young Warrior" Challenge

2016-12-17T20:01:52Z

Caldymugs:

{

In this video Chris tries to create a new challenge, similar to the JLS Ice Bucket challenge (In his head). This video is the introduction of the challenge and Chris encourages everybody to try it.
After introducing the Young Warrior Challenge, he goes on to play with his Alpha Trion and Sentinel Prime toy figures, pretending that the latter is Donald Trump.
Chris uses the toys to express his extremist left-wing views. However, it has been slightly dulled down from literally wishing death upon the opposing candidate on social media, more than likely the suggestion of someone else and not Chris's idea.
He also goes on to say how he is looking forward to communicating with official people about having [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] figures made. It seems that Chris is still oblivious to how no company is ever going to merchandise Sonichu.

Chris endorses BigBadToyStore.com several times in this video.
==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = The Alpha Trion/"Young Warrior" Challenge
| video = {{#ev:youtube|GJ9ZzY5uebA}}
| stardate = 30 November 2016
| maker = CwcvilleGuardian
| subject = {{(Handouts)|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| Saga = {{Financhu Crisis|text}}
| shirt = {{imdoneadulting|text}}
| other =
| previous = [[Patreon announcement]]
| next = [[Alpha Trion/"Young" warrior challenge explained]]
}}

'''Description'''

{{quotebox|Now accepting Donations on my Patreon Page,<ref>https://patreon.com/user?u=4525122&utm_medium=social&utm_source=facebook&utm_campaign=creatorshare2</ref>.

Citing emgo316
Alpha Trion Review<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sv_WbpYnUL8&index=20&list=PLszc8VRCv6OdxZ_ZqAIDl3K1pMvQefU8u</ref>

Soundwave Review<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JBNf7zPJ82U&list=PLszc8VRCv6OdxZ_ZqAIDl3K1pMvQefU8u&index=26</ref>

Alpha Trion on BigBadToyStore.com<ref>http://www.bigbadtoystore.com/bbts/product.aspx?product=HAS25157&mode=retail</ref>
}}

==Transcript==
Hello everybody; this is Christine Chandler coming to you live from home once again, and remind - and just saying once again about the Patreon that I am st- uh, just started up, the link is in the description of the previous v-video uploaded before this one. But, anyway I am doing this video because I have heard on Reddit earlier about how successful the ice bucket challenge was, and I- yeah, and regardless of how everybody is... getting a new challenge where they're- they might still be dumping very cold water from buckets on their heads, and also more recently I've heard getting backpacks thrown upon them by crowds or standing still to be mannequins.

'''[Chris pretends to be a mannequin briefly]''' Well, we're going to do something different today it's inspired and brought to you by emgo gay- emgo 3 1 6 I think... the link to his channel will be in the description below this video as well as big bad toy store dot com! I have just received this in the mail today from a- from a very nice gift, and a (???) since the Alpha Trion video, is the helpful- is the fun advice that he- emgo did the voice for Alpha [[Chris and English|Trorion]].'''[Chris puts on a strange voice, but then goes back to normal]''' Here's one example I remember firmly well because I liked that video from the soundwave video '''[Chris does the same voice again]''' Hear me now, and understand me tomorrow! When the gerbil retreats into its bunghole, the moon shall fall into a vat of tapioca '''[Chris laughs]''' and then Megatron says '''[Chris goes into a monologue with himself]''', you know what's weird (???) You know what's weird? I understood that. That made sense to me. It would. What's that supposed to mean? Did someone leave the front door open again? I'll put that video link in the description below let ya'll enjoy that. Anyway, so, yeah, so from there the old theme of YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAoung warrior... has been around since.

So, I'm issuing a new challenge, becau- uh- see how long everybody can go, go on saying that. Just- you can call it the Alpha Trion challenge, or it can be also known as the Young warrior challenge. Uh, which, I'm- I'm issuing it to everybody from this video introducing it, but initially you can have the Alpha Trion figure, available in stores or from big bad toy store dot com! I'll put that link in the description below! OR, if you can't afford the figure you can get the image of his head, his face and draw it onto a piece of paper and put it ''over'' your face... and then, shortly after the Young warrior you can make up your own sound advice, [[Chris and English|and stake that]], or take advice from an actual relative. '''[Chris screeches "Young Warrior over 12 seconds]'''
I'm starting (???) to help out with the Patreon, to help out with our [[Financhu Crisis|financial homes here]]. Anyway, YAAAAoung warrior! I love that line. Hear me now, and understand me tomorrow! That makes-[[Chris and English|that's definitely reflective true]].

And for my first piece of sound advice, we're going to take the... destroyed sentinel prime, or should I sa- or shou- or more accurately described it, the nearly destroyed [[Donald Trump]], because I still feel that way about him. So, to pretty much- announce the peaceful alternative that I would have preferred instead of wishing death upon him and Mike Pence presented by Alpha Trion [Chris speaks a strange voice] YAAAAAAAAAAAA- wha?, you're not so young, you're old [[Donald Trump]]! And Mike Pence is no picture either, Anyway, Young Warrior! Hear me now, and understand me tomorrow! Relinquish your position that you will be taking in January and take Mike Pence with you and allow Hillary and Kaine to take the rightful presidential position! Otherwise, until you do, or if you don't everyone will be praying for your death (???) to happen before the coming January in 2017.

So, relinquish your '''[Chris briefly returns to his normal, high voice]''' office patrol. Well then, as- as [[Donald Trump]], presidential (???) I hereby relinquish my role in office, and I take Mike Pence with me, and I give it to Hillary Clinton! Hooray for America! And the LGBTQ, and everybody else... Grr. (???) but you know what? I'm not they're president! But my name will always, Not my president! '''[Chris returning to normal voice again briefly]''' He's certainly not my president, [[Donald Trump]]. Anyway, I shall go back to my finances and allow the presidential debate that I would never be capable of dealing with, and let [[Hillary Clinton]] take the role. Thank you Alpha Trion for your s-helpful advice. [[Random-access humor|Where's my soup? Jimmy?! JIMMY]]?! '''[Chris returns back to his normal voice]'''

Okay, so anyway, that's one example. I put it upon everybody else to offer their- rant- their individual examples for the Alpha Trion YAAAAAAAAAAAoung warrior challenge! In favour of helping me out at home towards getting backing to [[Chris and English|creamfield creatively]] inspired- to make [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] some more. Some more figures and hopefully actually get face-to-face in person, NOT over the internet or Skype communications with [[Nintendo|official people]] and actually have things going progressing with that. Thank you very much, and have a good day.

==References==
<references />

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, 2016]]
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

White knight

2016-12-13T12:13:36Z

Caldymugs:

{{Articleofthenow}}
 
[[Image:White knight.jpg|center]]
[[Image:Jack's Knight as William Spicer.jpg|thumb|right|180px|Artist's conception.]]

{{quote|Isn't there a white knight upon a fiery steed?|[[If You Were a Woman and I Was a Man|Bonnie Tyler]], "[[Holding Out for a Hero]]"}}

'''White knight''' is a term used to describe someone who goes on [[the Internet]] to help or defend someone else against other people, out of [[CWC is Sad|pity or compassion]], or for [[China|ulterior motives]]. White knighting of [[Chris]] is especially prevalent because of the sheer volume of abuse he's taken ever since he found his [[Encyclopedia Dramatica ]] page, which in turn is caused by Chris's total unwillingness to heed any of his many white knights.

'''Counter-trolls''' are those who take Chris's side to spite his [[trolls]]. Some do this because trolling one gullible idiot is less satisfying than trolling trolls, who actually have the ability to understand what is going on. Others have decided that Chris has jumped the shark and are trying to make everyone else leave him alone to put a stop to an old meme. Counter-trolls are not to be confused with [[anti-troll]]s, who fight trolls in order to get closer to Chris and troll him themselves.

In the broader internet trolling community, a wide range of people, from neutral observers to even his greatest trolls, are accused of being white knights. This is mostly due to Chris's "fans" discouraging [[Weening]] and [[A-Logging]], acts which, to outside observers, could be misinterpreted as an attempt to reduce trolling. Many of these outside observers are also confused by the tendency of Chris's trolls, including his most [[Vivian Gee|prolific]] [[Clyde Cash|ones]], trying to get him to improve his life, as they don't know Chris well enough to know it's nigh impossible to get him to improve using the "soft touch". So when the label "white knight" gets thrown around, take it with a grain of salt.

A meta-topic within the broader Chris saga has been the merits of attempting to help Chris stop being a lolcow, and whether he is deserving of such assistance, or even beyond help. Once upon a time, the consensus on forums such as the talk page for Chris's ED article, [[/cwc/]], [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (message board)|PVCC]], and [[Sonichu (IRC chat)|#sonichu]] was that Chris's [[racism]], [[Homos|homophobia]], and [[Chris and his Ego|narcissism]] made him beneath contempt; and that he has consistently refused to take advice given to him in good faith.

Today, however, Chris's racism and homophobia are slowly ebbing away along with his parents' influence over him, and A-Logging is no longer as fashionable as it once was. Accordingly, nowadays, opinion on the matter is somewhat divided on whether Chris is capable of improvement, although most agree that if Chris is going to improve, it will not be in any large part due to the efforts of third parties because, in the main, he is still too proud and stubborn to accept advice.

Some believe that Chris is improving on his own, albeit slowly and in small increments, as seen in his gradual abandonment of his homophobia, which began with him declaring tolerance for lesbians, which he eventually extended to gay men. Others believe that Chris has not tangibly improved, that he has merely moved sideways, rather than forward. Many of these believe that Chris cannot improve, for example, his [[tugboat]], his public misadventures and the thorough documentation of his sordid dealings online make employment all but an impossibility for Chris. Many more quibble over what can be defined as Chris "improving". Some have proposed that Chris improving need not necessarily mean becoming a functioning adult, which at this stage would be an uphill battle for Chris anyway. Rather, they claim that Chris is improving in that he is happier than he once was. He has found [[Impulse Gay Social Club|a new hangout]] where he stands to improve his social skills and make friends. Moreover, he has finally found a way to cash in on his e-fame, delighted his fanbase by resuming the comics ''and'' made his dreams of a Sonichu media empire a reality, albeit probably on a much smaller scale than he once envisaged.

In any case, the consensus on white knights and counter-trolls has remained somewhat consistent; they are and always have been seen as wasting everyone's time by trolls and Christorians alike, who accordingly have little patience for them.

==Motives==

===Pity===
Following the release of Chris's first [[nudes]] and the [[Chris Chan Update 21 October 2008|video]] in which he reacted to the loss of his [[medallion]]s and [[Blanca]], many people, including trolls, felt sorry for him. They had not expected it to be possible for him to be trolled so hard or for him to appear so shattered.

===Empathy===
The internet is full of [[autistic]] people, manchildren, and self-absorbed morons. Many of them are right here, fascinated with Chris. All of them see something of themselves in him, whether it's his [[obesity]], his all-consuming need for female companionship, or his fervent belief that his homemade comics matter. A lot of white knights have made at least some of the mistakes Chris has made and have since wised up. They think they can help improve Chris by offering the benefit of their experience.

===Circumstances beyond Chris's control===
Chris fails to identify people, a possible sign of [[Wikipedia:Prosopagnosia|prosopagnosia]]. [[BlueSpike|Julie and her brother Max]] used the same voice, and yet Chris couldn't recognize that they were the same person. Pictures of different women were used to depict Blanca, and yet Chris thought they were the same person. Chris believed that pictures of [[Wikipedia:Megan Fox|Megan Fox]] were of [[Vanessa Hudgens]].<ref>[[Vanessa AIM Chat 9|Vanessa AIM Chat IX]]</ref> In high school, Chris memorized his appearance in the mirror because he had trouble recognizing himself.<ref>[[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]] - [http://thedailypos.org/misc/sonichu/Issue%207/SchuComic8Page24.jpg "...I had to train my brain to visually remember what I looked like..."]</ref> Since he's never "updated" his self-image, this is a possible explanation regarding why he denies being fat.

Chris' autism also means that he thinks, and sees the world, in simplistic, binary terms; he cannot easily "read between the lines" or detect sarcasm, or practically any kind of nuance or subtlety. He interprets ''[[Family Guy]]'' as being against homosexuality.<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate March 10th, 2009]]</ref> When 2 male acquaintances exchanged sarcastic homosexual remarks, Chris concluded that they were gay.<ref>Anecdote by [[Mimms]].</ref> It is also thought that his decision to go [[tomgirl]] was at least partially due to him taking advice to "get in touch with his feminine side" literally.

===The trolls are even worse people than Chris===
Another frequently heard line of reasoning is that the trolls have gone way too far, and have demonstrated that they're even worse than Chris, or at least equally pathetic. For example, BlueSpike's sadistic abuse of his control over Chris [[BLUESPIKE#Encyclopedia_Dramatica_Troll_War|outraged even trolls]]. The [[JULAAAY|less sophisticated]] bulk of the trolling was the work of A-Logs and weens, who are frowned upon even by trolls, and rightfully so. And, of course, who really has no life here: Chris, or the people who [[CWCki|obsessively document and debate everything he does]]?

===For the sake of [[Barbara]]'s sanity===
At this point in time it is safe to say that Chris's remaining parent has been just as fatigued as Chris by the actions of trolls. Some argue that Snorlax should not have to suffer for his wrongdoings, and therefore think that Chris should be left alone just so she can enjoy the last few years of her life in peace.

==Reasons against white knighting==
===Chris could have ended the trolling whenever he wanted to, but didn't===
All Chris had to do to end the trolling was to stop responding to it. If he had taken this small step, [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] would've made his ED page and that probably would've been the end of it. The first trolls had nothing personal against Chris; they just decided he was a worthy target after reading his [[Sonichu (comic)|crappy ''Sonichu'' comics]] and seeing him go into a meltdown over his ED page. If he'd quit responding to their provocations and quit posting [[12 October 2009|videos of himself throwing tantrums]] on [[YouTube]], the trolls would have eventually just moved on to someone else. Instead, Chris tried to "fight back" against them, in turn revealing more and more of his personal information, until eventually the trolls knew all of his contact info and all the details of his life.

That was when the trolling went past a point of no return, spilling into Chris' personal life so much that there would be absolutely no way for him to ever disassociate himself from it. Even when he was away from the computer, he would find himself subjected to trolls calling his cell phone, sending him mail, and following him around in public. While the obsessive trolling was nothing less than shitty, the fact still remains that Chris was the one who allowed them to have such control over his life; thanks to him always overreacting to every little provocation and handing over all his personal information to them.

There is also the theory that Chris does things for trolls to mock him merely for the attention.

===Chris lacks empathy himself===
:''See also: [[Chris and death]], [[Autism]] and [[Chris and his Ego]].''
Chris cannot put himself in your shoes or accept that you have been where he is. He has no "theory of mind": if you used to be as shy around women as he is today, in his mind the fact that you aren't shy anymore makes your experience inapplicable to his situation. To Chris, the fact you got over it and he hasn't yet makes the two cases entirely different. He doesn't want to solve his problems by trying what worked for you, he only wants you to pity him for having problems, until he magically dreams up [[Dating education|his own solution]]. In recent years, many have even began to opine that Chris doesn't even ''want'' help; as can be observed in his frequent outbursts on Facebook, what he really wants is to exploit his own misfortune to get pity, attention and gifts. It is also theorized that helping him is pointless because Chris is well-known for always wanting to have his cake and eat it. Even if he woke up tomorrow morning and found that all of his dreams had come true, he'd still concoct new grievances.

:'''RocketFox:''' My father died of liver cancer and cirrohosis a day ago ;~; he drank a ton and it hurt him - I'm only 11 and I dunno what to do ;~;
:'''Chris:''' RocketFox, you will soon recover from your father's accident, I guess it is; DO NOT DRINK Alcohol yourself; STAY OFF THAT JUNK.<ref>[[IRC (16 October 2008)]]</ref>

Chris's interpretation of the death of RocketFox's dad as an accident shows that he didn't even bother to look up what cirrhosis is. Immediately after this, he started talking about a sexy dance. And 8 months later, he was filmed enjoying some [[Long Island Iced Tea]].

Chris's reactions to suicide are very telling. After hearing that he caused [[Ryan Cash]] to die, Chris marveled at the fact that he had incited suicide, right after he tried to publicly console [[Clyde Cash]].<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate December 28th, 2008]]</ref> When he heard that he made [[Sarah May]] attempt suicide, his reasons for her to stay alive were "I'd feel terrible" and "I'd just cry."<ref>[[Mumble 8|Mumble #8]]</ref><ref>[[CWC Shout Out to Sarah May]]</ref> When Chris broke up with [[Ivy]], he somehow concocted, in his head, an assumption that she had committed suicide. Even after having lost so many dear friends to suicide, he still had no problems telling Clyde and [[Jack Thaddeus]] to [[death threats|kill themselves]]. People who have had to deal with suicidal people, or have lost relatives or friends to suicide wouldn't exactly find this amusing.

In the [[Common_Questions#22_February_2010|22 February 2010]] edition of the [[CWCipedia]]'s "Common Questions", Chris listed the top ten worst things to have ever happened to him. The deaths of "two True and Good Women who [he] had friendships with," [[PandaHalo]] and [[Sarah Jackson]], ranked seventh. Those tragic events ranked below getting banned from a game store, finding out two people from said store were posting info about him on ED, and having his personal websites hacked.

On 1 [[November 2009]], Chris went as far as to mock '''9/11''' (more on ''that'' video can be found in the "Chris is beyond pity section").

When Rashid Ali Abdul, an Iranian [[fan]], told him that her country's religious authorities sentenced her to death by beheading for reading ''Sonichu'', Chris simply said that he was "sorry" and that the situation was "pitiful".<ref>[[Mailbag 8|Mailbag #8]]</ref>

While some of this can be attributed to Chris's [[autism]], a condition that often results in a lack of empathy, most autistics can at least learn how to express empathy through a combination of carefully reading the emotions of others and thinking about how a situation affects other people, but Chris refuses to seek serious counseling or psychiatric help for this sort of thing, and was clearly given little-to-no help with his autism as he grew up.

===Autism does not excuse a terrible person===
Chris knows he has trouble understanding non-verbal social cues due to his autism,<ref>[[Quizzes#Autism Quiz]]</ref> and yet he still jumps the gun on interpreting other people's intentions all the time.

Autism, in and of itself, does not create a failure as massive as Chris. A majority of autistics manage to get psychiatric help for their problem and/or are able to develop social and emotional skills so they can cope with their disability and lead rewarding and rich lives. While Chris acknowledges he has a problem, he has never done anything more than see the [[Rocky Shoemaker|pastoral counselor]] at his church, who is not a professional trained in the treatment of autism spectrum disorders, and whom he eventually dismissed anyway.<ref>[[Vivian's AIM chat]]</ref>

After he [[26 December 2014|maced a GameStop employee and said it made him feel "badass"]], a deeply concerned troll going by the name Renee tried to convince him to go to see a psychiatrist. In response, Chris took this as a personal insult, and wished "Renee" and her boyfriend a slow demise in a house fire. Not only does this demonstrate that Chris holds his ego in higher esteem than his mental health, but it is also quite staggering that he would wish death in a fire upon someone [[Destruction Of Chris's House|''after he narrowly escaped the same fate'']]. Moreover, it is worth noting that Chris remembered that Renee had told him in the past that she already had a boyfriend. Compare his reaction to this well-meaning request from Renee, to his compliance with more bizarre requests from, say, Jackie. This shows that regardless of who you are or what you want to say, Chris only cares to listen to you if you have a [[china]] and aren't already taken.

Chris is fully capable of understanding the consequences of his actions. He has a sense of morality, even if he often ignores it in favor of his own interests. He has been held accountable for his own actions in a court of law, twice (and rightfully so). His racism and chauvinism have nothing to do with his autism.

===Chris is beyond pity===
[[Image:Chrischantwoface.jpg|thumb|right|Chris's mood is all over the place, even between videos posted shortly after each other. From "[[Happy Sonichu Day|Thank you for your support]]" to "[[Chris Drops the N-Bomb|Goddamn womanizing raping...trollin' stupid pickle-suited...'''nigger'''!]]"]]

Chris often reacts to provocation aggressively, which is quite an understandable (if not acceptable) response to trolling. However, "provocation" doesn't necessarily mean harassment or trolling. Merely disagreeing with Chris's opinions, asking him why he does what he does, or as evidenced above, trying to expose him to reality can provoke an attack, up to and including threats of violence and death. When Chris is annoyed, frustrated, or overcome by desire or lust, he's capable of doing [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|''unpleasant'']] things. Moreover, when Chris loses it, he doesn't think of the consequences of his actions at all, and his expressions of outrage are completely out of proportion to the provocation — often more outrageous in themselves than whatever the trolls did. Chris believes that since he is reacting to being "wronged" by someone else, his actions, no matter how extreme they are, are justified.

Chris has [[Yu-Gi-Oh!|insulted young children]] during card games and scared some of them away from [[The GAMe PLACe]]. [[Mimms]] and [[Lucas]], who frequented the now-defunct store and knew Chris in real life years before he was discovered by ED, couldn't list any redeeming qualities he possessed.

Chris has sexually harassed [[Megan|two]] [[Catherine|women]] in real life. The former made it explicitly clear to him that his inappropriate touching and comments to her were unacceptable, but he continued anyway, convinced that eventually she would learn to love being molested by a mentally ill manchild and would become his [[sweetheart from the ground-up]]. He ''bragged'' to the latter about how he learned to keep his hands to himself after the fallout with Megan, then faceplanted her breasts.

After Megan cut ties with Chris for uploading [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|a drawing of him fingerbanging her]] to his ED page, he did not apologize,<ref name="Megan Saga">[http://encyclopediadramatica.se/Chris-chan/Megan_Saga Megan Saga]</ref> but rather explained to her (in a terribly [[naïve]] way) how a handjob works, under the misguided assumption that she merely was upset because she didn't recognize the sex act being performed, or in the hope that she would rationalize what he did on this basis. When this failed to placate her, he then had the nerve to say "I am hurting SOOOOO MUCH MORE than you can be."<ref name="Megan Saga"/> Why? Not because of the picture, but because the trolls were being mean to him. Yes, ''[[Ego|him]]''. Based on [[List of Chris's ED edits|his ED edits]], he was more concerned with people thinking he was fingering his [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|imaginary twin sister]] than he was with defending Megan's honor.

Years later, Chris would go so far as to totally demonize Megan for rejecting his 'good intentions', posting her address up on his [[Facebook]] profile in the hopes that trolls would find it and punish her for him. On 3 and 4 October 2013, he took this even further, posting [[October_2013_Facebook_Posts#Megagi_La_Skunk_agrees_that_you_should_have_never_been_born|an unbelievable multi-part tirade]] about Megan on Facebook, wherein he accused her of being the leader of a vast troll conspiracy against him and claimed to have consorted with a ''[[Chris and reality|fictional]] [[Megagi La Skunk|character]]'' Megan once made for him, who supposedly told Chris that Megan [[Sandy|should never have been born]]. As if this wasn't enough insanity on its own, Chris then went on to claim he had confiscated the [[Sailor Megtune]] superpowers he had given her in the comics, and proceeded to demand that Megan fix his entire life, or else he would sic the spirits of his deceased father and dog on her.

After each of his online relationships ends, Chris starts looking for a new [[sweetheart]] right away, ''even if she died''. No matter the setback, his ego just keeps getting bigger.

In mid-July 2009, he addressed a person named [[The July 10th Messages|"SonichuIzCool"]] on YouTube. SonichuIzCool is probably the ''only'' genuine fan of ''Sonichu'' discovered to date, someone who tried to defend Chris and his comic. She was also genuinely mentally disabled. In his YouTube message, Chris called her "naïve and [[slow in the mind]]." He told her she had to "come out where [he] can meet [her]." Another side of this incident is that his YouTube account had been recently hacked, and he had managed to recover it this time, thus avoiding whatever damage the trolls ''might'' have caused. Poetically, after he posted this video, he got his account suspended due to ''his own actions''. SonichuIzCool didn't step down, and responded back with a video that criticized his actions. To date, Chris has never issued a response to that, thus meaning he was dismantled by a slow-in-the-mind.

On 1 November 2009, in his attempt to blackmail Clyde Cash, Chris went so far as to create a YouTube video called [[Twin Falling Towers]], wherein he ''mocks 9/11''. When feeling angry at Clyde Cash, he not only thought it would be a good idea to blackmail him, but used the ''destruction of two skyscrapers full of people after being hit by airliners full of jet fuel and terrorists'' as a metaphor for how weak he thought Clyde was. He even used his mouse cursor as a "plane" and made childish explosion noises. When people got angry, he tried to fix things by turning the World Trade Center towers into [[Cakefarts|cake]] candles. To the best of anyone's knowledge, Chris was never coaxed or encouraged by an outside source to use the Twin Tower images. He came up with this reprehensible idea all on his own.

[[Image:MikesWedding.jpg|thumb|right|Happily forever after.]]

In January 2010, a "fan" named Mike Jackson asked Chris for advice, whether he should [[Mailbag 31#If your kids are 16 or 17, you should watch porn with them|watch pornography with his family]] and [[Mailbag 35#In which Chris advises a father to buy his son whores|buy a prostitute for his son]], Mike Junior, or not. Chris, being such an [[Dating Education|"expert"]], encouraged him to do so. When "Mike" got back to him, the news wasn't good; Mike Jr. ran away with the prostitute, and Mike Sr. begged Chris to make a [[YouTube]] video asking his son to come home. Unfortunately, Chris was under a lot of [[stress]], and could not make the video. Chris was next contacted by Mike's "wife", who told him that after discovering that Mike Jr. had married the prostitute in Las Vegas, Mike Sr. died from a sleeping pill overdose. Chris didn't even give a damn about the obituary linked by Mike's widow, offering her his infamous canned response in lieu of even pretending to give a fuck, then later responded to Mike's son's grief and anger with all of three words: [[Chris and remorse|"I am sorry."]] When called out later, he denied having ever spoken to Mike, much less read his obituary. While this was all obviously trolling, Chris's nonchalant reaction to his hypothetically ruining someone's life and tearing their family apart doesn't exactly paint him in a good light.

In the post [[Tomgirl_Saga| Tomgirl saga]] world of Chris some trolls have shown remorse over past trollings of Chris. Some cite Chris' new minority gender identity and his infamous autism as reasons to be more sympathetic to Chris. However, Chris has never shown respect for other transgendered people, but has been outright transphobic [[Doxing Jeff/Francine|by refusing to acknowledge their identity]] or [[I Am me; He is not| using slurs against them]]. This does not stop Chris demanding that people respect his new found gender identity without a hint of self-awareness. Chris has made it clear he doesn't have respect for others even if they share very similar problems or experiences like him. Even post tomgirl Chris has also gone on record refusing to date anyone transgendered or with autism. Chris hates those who are similar to him for bringing his insecurities and imperfections to light and will lash out at them for it.

Any reason you might could find for believing you can save Chris is only fooling yourself. Chris has willfully chosen to become a leech on society and any of many people listed on this wiki who had taken pity on him. He goes from person to person and community to community only to take what ever he feels entitled to from them, and then throw a temper tantrum when they expel him for unacceptable behavior. To illustrate this point, many of the people Chris has hated the most were not trolls or cruel to him, but simply had gotten in the way of things he wanted regardless if it was intentional or not. For example, [[Wes Iseli]] for dating a girl he liked, [[Adam Stackhouse]] for winning a contest he wanted to win, or [[Mary Lee Walsh]] for prohibiting his [[attraction sign]] on campus. This is a cycle that anyone who has followed Chris' misadventures is familiar with and it is safe to say your efforts to change or help him will be no different. Chris needs professional and perhaps Institutional help. Anonymous strangers as well meaning as they may are not equipped with the proper recourses to help Chris, especially as Chris continues [[List of places that have banned Chris| to get banned throughout Charlottesville]] many times without the help of trolls or weens.

===Chris cares only for himself===
Chris spends [[monthly tugboat|your tax money]] on luxuries and steals from his parents to buy [[PSN|random video games]] he'll never play, and even DLC for ''games he doesn't own''. He has the basic skills necessary to hold down a job, so long as it doesn't require him to do much interacting with other people. Programs exist specifically to find appropriate jobs for the mentally challenged, but Chris hasn't even tried since being fired from [[Wendy's]]. He's never going to get a job now, of course - what with his various run-ins with the law, his growing local reputation for public tantrums and violence, his social security, and the fact that he's in his thirties, and has only been employed for a month or so in his entire life, over a decade ago - but he missed a lot of opportunities while it was still possible. Had he made the right choices, he could've been on a career path and out of his ancestral cesspool by now.

Further reinforcing his selfishness and laziness, Chris and his family strongly agree it's better for him to hole up in his room and get paid for doing absolutely nothing than to accept the challenge of finding gainful employment in the real world. This is based on the false assertion that Chris can earn more on disability than from a job. By taking advantage of the government through vastly exaggerated claims of an easily manageable illness which they refuse to help Chris treat, Chris's parents are assured a steady income in the form of his room-and-board payments, and don't have to worry about Chris getting in trouble with the law [[Chris and the Law|again]] when he has another breakdown in public.

But just in case you needed any solid proof of Chris' outright selfishness, it basically came straight from the horse's mouth during his trial. When asked if he understood that he'll be paying his court fees:

{{quote| "Yes. My mother will be taking care of that." |Chris.<ref>[[This_is_how_the_Trial_went]]</ref>}}

Keep in mind that the money being used to bail him out of a mess that he caused is coming out of an ailing old widow's purse while Chris [[Chris and Money|nonchalantly throws his own money away]], as evidenced by his PSN activity mere months later. Also, in 2013, [[Facebook#I_have_had_more_freedom_when_my_father_was_alive|he further hammers this point home]] by complaining about having to take care of Barb with Bob's passing, concerned more about his free time and Michael Snyder taking his money away.

===Chris is not a good net citizen===
{{quote|I will have NO DISCUSSIONS GOING ON BEHIND MY BACK ON MY OWN WEBSITE WHATSOEVER!|Chris, on reader participation via [[Twitter]].}}
Chris is more concerned with spreading his own [[honest content]] than being a good net citizen. On the internet, his demeanor is comparable to that of a spammer: who cares about things like terms of service and account suspensions and masses of pissed-off people as long as his message gets through? He won't participate in the communities of the sites he posts on. This is not mere ''passivity'' in those communities, which is generally tolerable; he ''deliberately opposes'' such participation. Most people, while not bothering to contribute to communities, would at least not make deliberate efforts to hinder them. On [[deviantART]], [[YouTube]] and [[Flipnote Hatena]], he disables all comments, probably because he knew he'd not get any praise anyway, yet this ignores the fact that open commenting is part of the nature of these sites and disabling comments should be done only if it's being used for flagrant abuses of the system, like spam, excessive trolling, and votebotting. He regards YouTube purely as a video publishing venue and not as a tool for engaging in discussion with his "fans". He created his [[Wikipedia]] user page purely to spread his own message, and did not come to the site to participate in building an encyclopedia. If the site owners block him, he just comes up with another account or a sockpuppet. Thoughts of apologizing, getting old accounts reinstated, or the possibility that people who block him might be trying to send him a message never cross his mind.

Chris's behavior on the CWCipedia provides many more examples of his selfish attitude, such as the banner ad crisis in late 2009. He doesn't understand what it ''really'' means that the website is neither hosted nor paid for by him personally, and what sort of things the administration typically does on a website like his. He can't or won't understand simple principles like "webhost's house, webhost's rules," or "beggars can't be choosers," but instead believes that since the site has his name on it, it should be run according to his every demand.

===Chris will reject your advice===
[[Image:0231-MrsSanfordsWiseWords.jpg|thumb|right|What are you going to tell Chris that his [[Virginia Jeanine Sanford|favorite teacher]] didn't tell him 20 years ago?]]
Someone [[White knight E-mails|carefully explained to Chris why he is a sexist]]. In response, Chris got angry. He is only interested in a guide on how to attract women without first making any changes to himself. Most ridiculously: he denies being [[Obesity|overweight]].

If you ever get some free time, read Vivian Gee's AIM chat. Vivian actually used to be a counter-troll, and warned Chris several times that PandaHalo was a troll. Chris fell for Panda anyway. She then tried to talk some damn sense into him over AIM. But Chris proved to be so goddamn stubborn, she actually tossed the towel and became a troll out of spite. In her words:

{{quote|i've tried for 3 hours now; it's like fighting a wall, i can't beat the wall no matter how hard i try.|Vivian, thoroughly summing up how it feels to try to smack some sense into Chris.}}

Not only has she long since joined the troll ranks, but Chris even began [[Sign Destruction Video|berating and sending threats]] to the woman who was once his biggest defender ever.

===Chris will reject your disclosure of the truth===
* [[Hanna]] was a real-life troll, and Chris fell for it.
* [[Lori Lopez]] was a real-life troll, and Chris fell for it.
* Blanca was the name of more than a few trolls, and Chris fell for it.
* PandaHalo was a troll, and Chris fell for it, despite Vivian's warnings.<ref>[[Vivian Gee E-mails]]</ref>
* [[Robert Simmons V]] was a troll, and Chris fell for it.
* [[JK Productions]] was a troll pretending to be an entire video game development company, and Chris fell for it.
* Sarah May was a troll, and Chris fell for it.
* [[Sarah Jackson]] was a troll, and Chris fell for it.
* [[Shigeru Miyamoto]] was a troll, and Chris fell for it.
* Julie was a troll, and Chris fell for it.
* Ivy was a troll, and Chris fell for it, despite warnings from the counter-troll that must not be named.
* [[Vanessa Hudgens]] was a troll, and Chris fell for it.
* [[Emily]] was a real-life troll, and Chris fell for it.
* [[Kacey]] was a troll, and Chris fell for it. She also married [[Liquid Chris]].
** [[Father Call|Kacey's dad]] was a troll, and Chris fell for it.
* [[Jackie]] was a troll, and Chris fell for it. [[February_2012|Twice.]]
* [[Catherine]] was a real-life troll, and Chris fell for it, despite [[Anna McLerran|Anna]]'s warnings.

See a pattern here? Back in the day, Chris would've simply dismissed any attempt to open his eyes to the obvious as an attempt to "ruin his relationship/business partnership for the lulz".

As of 2012, however, it seems that Chris has done a 180 on this, where, out of [[Autism|sheer paranoia]], he believes that anybody<ref>[[:File:Fbp10.png]]</ref> and everybody<ref>[[:File:Fbp6.png]]</ref> is a troll, even when he has no sane reason to reach that conclusion<ref>[[:File:Koreans.PNG]]</ref>.

Surprisingly, even in [[2014]], it was revealed that his latest girlfriend, Catherine, was a troll construct. While [[CWCki Forums|the community observing Chris]] are [[Trolls#Today|no longer impressed]] by such [[weening]], it still shows that even after almost a decade of trolls leading him around by his [[duck]], Chris has learned absolutely nothing.

===Chris's normal life is often weirder than the trolling===
Chris won't take your advice, so he will fall for trolling. Trolls do some ''bizarre'' things and Chris believes almost everything. But even if Chris had no white knights or trolls, his life would still be out of the ordinary.

The things Chris achieves when left to his own devices are sometimes even more jaw-dropping than what the trolls think up. His previous brushes with [[Jerkops|authority figures]] and his [[Attraction Sign|creepy]] [[Fridays After Five|behavior]] during his outside leisure time are good examples.

===Chris asks for it, and always recovers===
Hellbent on spreading his version of the truth because he's TRUE and HONEST, Chris cannot realize that his edit warring on Encyclopedia Dramatica was practically a squeal begging for more trolling.

[[wiktionary:TMI|TMI]] is a tactic Chris uses that backfires without fail. Since Chris insists on revealing the most minute details of his life to everyone he meets, the trolls always get more information to fuel further acts of trolling. White knights cannot stop our hero from being honest.

Chris doesn't get embarrassed either. Oh, his nudes and [[Recycling|lewd acts]] are all over the internet? No big deal! [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009|All adults do that kind of thing]], so what's the problem?

Chris managed to fully recover from the depressing [[Chris Chan Update 21 October 2008|21 October 2008 video]] mentioned above (and quite quickly, too) and proceeded to fail even harder for months. Likewise, despite professing great emotional distress, he bounced back from [[CWC is Sad|the loss of Kacey]] in [[Red Letter CWC Certified Day|a matter of hours]]. He even bounced back after being [[Mumble 9|verbally abused by a room of trolls]], one of whom went so far as to tell him to go kill himself. Whatever the trolls say or do to Chris, he always does or says something worse to someone else, and he always bounces back anyway, so what's the problem?

[[Image:Chriscash.jpg|thumb|right|180px|True, true.]]

===Chris has made himself an outcast===
High school and college are where people are given their first and often only chance to become a functioning part of society. They gave Chris an even greater chance because he's autistic. They lent him a friendly, caring hand and opened themselves to his friendship, males and females alike. And what did Chris do? He ''refused, by choice,'' to associate with anyone who wasn't female, young, white, in the Charlottesville area, and willing to mother him forever more.

When [[Mary Lee Walsh|the dean]] gave him a chance to reform his behavior, he kept going with his bullshit, threw a particularly bizarre tantrum in her office, and was rightly kicked out of [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] for a full year. What did he learn from that? He learned that Mary Lee Walsh was an evil hag with a personal vendetta against him. He was given ''several'' chances to learn that his loitering and soliciting were not appropriate behaviors in a public place, and what did he learn? He learned that mall cops are Jerkops, that [[Virginia is for Virgins]], and that his [[Love Quest]] was a matter of him against the world, with the world as the antagonist. After he was kicked out of The GAMe PLACe (where he was again given far more leeway than most people ever would have been given, due to Snyder's misguided pity for him), he was barred from his last hangout in Ruckersville that was still open to him.

Now, it's too late for Chris. He has been offered friendship and care time and again, and every time without fail, he drives his friends away with his entitlement, his perverse, bizarre, bellicose behaviors, or his inappropriate sexual advances, or, failing that, he will dismiss them for trying to get him to improve himself or behave like a responsible adult. While he has began frequenting [[Impulse Gay Social Club]] in recent months, and could potentially make friends there, many Christorians believe it is merely a matter of time before history repeats itself and Chris alienates himself from the other regulars.

Complain as he might, Chris's own actions have made him an outcast, and since he refuses to accept this, much less attempt to improve himself, an outcast he shall remain. Try as they might, neither white knights nor trolls have the power to save Chris from his delusions and cognitive dissonance, only he does.

===The stresses of white-knighting===
In order to get close to Chris, white knights have to spend at least as much time and effort as trolls to keep up-to-date on his activities. Most have to lie and pretend to be a single girl to even capture his attention. This, combined with Chris's habit of pushing away anyone who tries to connect with him, is enough to make any sane non-psychologist crash into slumber.

===Chris will not even read your message===
The spam filter is a powerful innovation of good ol' America Online. Any e-mails sent to his address will be left unread and deleted. Even back in the days of the [[Mailbag]], any emails submitted to it, if they even got published, would've been [[Mailbag 29|given one-word replies and ignored]].

===The trolling will not cease===
Even if white knights get to Chris somehow, there is no endgame in which Chris will be free from trolls before his death.

In school, Chris was trolled by his classmates. He was even trolled by one of his [[Joshua Martinez|real life friends]]. In college, he was trolled by friends who grew sick of his bullshit, and by [[Anna McLerran|girls]] [[Hannah|annoyed]] by his "attraction methods" and rampant, unabashed sexism. If Chris quit the Internet tomorrow, he would still be trolled by a society that refuses to tolerate ignorant manchildren flouting its rules.

If everyone trying to create his next fake sweetheart suddenly got bored and quit, Chris would unconsciously attract new trolls to take their place, and we all know weens are more than willing.

If Chris isn't assigned a custodian after Barbara dies, his story will probably end when he falls victim to some con artist who swindles him out of his monthly tugboat and perhaps his home. If Chris does get assigned a custodian, he will continue his antics until the custodian kicks him out or bans him from the internet. If the custodian bans Chris from the internet, that's Chris trolling himself.

If Chris ends up in prison (again) he will be trolled there as well, and that's if he's lucky.

If the entire world reforms and decides to leave Chris alone, his own sense of victimization will override any benefit. Consider that Chris felt persecuted simply by observing [[JERKS|males who had more success than himself]]. He regards legitimate assertions of authority as rank brutality. [[Adam Stackhouse]] managed to upset Chris to a degree that Christorians still find especially impressive, and he did it without even knowing that Chris existed at the time. Bleak as it is, unless Chris embarks on a program of radical self-improvement, and manages against the odds to shake off both his legions of abusers and seamy reputation, he will forever feel like a thoroughly-kicked autistic.

===The trolling helps Chris and, indeed, others===
If Chris were just some random nobody on the Internet, he'd be doing nothing but playing vidya and occasionally drawing unsellable art until Barb died. He'd remain without social skills, a job, success or future.

Instead, Chris's antics have become a cultural phenomenon that, without exaggeration, is something extraordinary, unique, and which likely won't be replicated in any shape or form for years to come. Chris has long secured his place among such luminaries as [[wikipedia:Time Cube|Gene Ray]] and [[wikipedia:John Titor|John Titor]], and unlike Gene, you can actually comprehend what Chris is saying most of the time. Chris's interactions with the world through his websites and YouTube have drawn in a considerable number of people from around the world who are participating in an unprecedented, continual piece of performance art of a kind that would have been unheard of only a few years ago. He brings entertainment to thousands of people all over Earth, an accomplishment that most could never dream of achieving--the kind of thing that would give Dane Cook a stiffy just to consider. His internet fame is actually a sort of success in its own right, and ''may'' bring him further success. There are thousands of people out there that are so fascinated by him that they study and document his life on a daily basis.

One could argue that if Chris eventually "retired" from this comedy act by actually coming to terms with his problems, seeking professional help, and completely reforming (and selling media rights to his life's story to the highest bidder, like all sensible people would do), he could live the rest of his life secure and probably moderately well-off. The audience would give him a standing ovation for entertaining them for as long as he did, and move on to the next piece of tragicomedy brought to us by the emerging Web technologies. We have seen far more messed-up celebrity stories already; Chris's tale is at least quite different from the norm and engaging.

What's more, the trolls provide him with an actual social outlet to learn and grow, even if he generally opts out of doing either. Instead of being an unemployable, fat bedroom-dweller that nobody has ever heard of, he's an internet-famous unemployable, fat bedroom dweller, and this by itself increases his chances of getting friends and a girl. He may even end up employed, too, possibly appearing in an advertisement or sponging off royalties from any biographical medium, whether it be a book, movie, or TV series. He could even [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (album)|become the next William Hung]] if he put half an ounce of effort into it.

In fact, recently, Chris seems to have latched onto the idea of monetizing his e-fame, which he has managed somewhat successfully. It started with him being paid by a Japanese noise band (albeit a really obscure one) to produce artwork for their album cover (that didn't feature Sonichu or himself for a change) in early 2015, for which he received $50. At around the same time, he started making replica [[medallions]], taking commissions, and, a little later, making custom Sonichu Amiibos, all of which sold fairly well on [[eBay]], particularly the medallions.

In [[August 2015]], Chris did what no-one had thought he would - he resumed work on the Sonichu comics, asking for donations in exchange for releasing new pages, at a price of $10 per page. He even redrew some of the old comics to be a [[Chris and anger|little more]] [[Death threats|tasteful]], for example retconning the infamous gory executions of the Asperpedia Four in the original version of [[Sonichu 10]] to banishment to an Amish community and forced marriage. Many on Kiwi Farms applauded his resumption of work on the comics, a move they had long suggested. It was predicted that the comics would be a better earner for Chris than the relatively unsuccessful botched Amiibos; although no-one could have forseen [[Autism|one person paying Chris $1000]] - which translates into 100 pages worth of new Sonichu comics - meaning Chris gets money for toys, weed and hormones, while we get new content, and the pleasure of watching the fallout <s>if</s> when Chris fails to produce that many pages. It should of course go without saying that Chris's merchandise is bought ([[Kenneth Erwin Englehardt|almost]]) exclusively by trolls, Christorians, and the rest of his "fanbase", as the fragile, low-quality crap he churns out has no value to anyone else. All in all, Chris is finally cashing in on his e-fame, which may someday lead to him "making peace" with his tormentors, and recognizing that he has a somewhat symbiotic relationship with them. Which of course, renders white knighting essentially redundant.

Another important point to remember is that Chris's perversions, flaws and constant failure have made his life into something of a cautionary tale to other autistic people, and he has inspired [[Autism#Chris and other autistics|hundreds]] of them to self-improvement. Really, no matter how dire his circumstances come to be, he's accomplishing a pretty good thing here.

===Chris treats "fans" and white knights like crap===
If you try to white knight him, his response is merely to block you on Facebook and never respond. He accuses practically all white knights of being trolls. Quite ironic, isn't it? He screams "I'M STRAIGHT!" when you tell him up front that you're a guy. When you tell him his current "girlfriend" is actually a troll, he'll accuse you of wanting to "break up the relationship for the lulz." He'll be rude, won't listen and won't read between the lines. He will always bite the hand that feeds him, so you should just let him wallow in [[You know what, I HATE ME TOO|his own self-loathing]].

{{quote|Whatever.|Chris' [[Mailbag_29#Whatever|1-word response]] to a fan leaving him, a social worker concerned about the [[Chris_and_health#Living_conditions|state of his house]], and a fan concerned about [[Chandler_Cats#Kitty|one of his cats]].}}
{{quote|You can go f*** yourself.|Chris' [[Mailbag_43#Go_Fuck_Yourself.2C_too.21|response]] to constructive criticism about [[Chris_and_copyright#Chris.27s_views|copyright]].}}

Chris doesn't treat his so-called "fans" much better. Even aside from the SonichuIzCool incident mentioned above, Chris has severe problems answering questions from his fans, and will often react in a hostile manner to everything he sees as negative or offensive. His Mailbag is the most obvious example. He hates being corrected, and tenaciously clings to his misinformed beliefs; his insistence that Asperger's Syndrome and autism are unrelated is a good example of this. When, or if, he's having a good day and manages to answer questions from fans at all, he often gives them very brief, one or two word answers that do not elaborate on anything, or outright ignore parts of the question. Not only is he terse, he's also slow to act; for example, it [[Brutal Legend Plus|took him three days to realize]] that a [[Brutal Legend|video he uploaded]] had no audio on it whatsoever. He also promised that [[Sonichu Fan Promo|a spectacular fan creation]] would be officially featured in the ''Sonichu'' comic, and it ultimately was, ''over a year later''.

Most webcomics have a specific schedule that they have decided to follow. Many webcomics fail to live up to them, some less, some more, some for good reasons, some have no excuse whatsoever. Chris didn't have a set schedule for the comic for the longest time, but then agreed to update the comic on a daily basis, a schedule which even the most well-funded webcomic artists would consider particularly demanding. In February and March 2010, there have been few updates to the comic. When the inevitable complaints about schedule slip started to come, Chris snapped at his fans by saying that inspiration takes its time, forgetting that it was ''he'' who decided daily updates were the way to go. As the "Great Director Chandler", he could have the power to decide what schedule to follow, but instead, he chose to attack his fans.

===Chris's upbringing doesn't justify his actions===
The shitty way [[Borb]] raised him may be an ''explanation'' for why Chris is so fucked up, but it's not an ''excuse''. Plenty of people have bad childhoods, and abusive or incompetent parents. However, these people don't use that as an excuse for whatever bad things they do. As these people get help and move on, Chris, on the other hand, remains dependent on the same people who screwed him up, and doesn't even try to move past his childhood. Instead, he escapes into a world of fantasy and pornography, and when confronted by reality, he will use all the mental gymnastics at his disposal to twist reality to resemble how he wants it to be. There's also the fact that [[Cole Smithey]] grew up in the same household with the same parents, and yet he lives a relatively normal life. Meanwhile, Chris behaves like an overgrown child, draws art on par with that of elementary schoolers, is chronically in trouble with the law for his persistent failure to regulate his own behavior in public, and generally is extremely antisocial.

===Chris's life would still be a disaster even if the trolls never bothered him===
Today, Chris is a total human trainwreck, slowly losing the last of his sanity as each day goes by. While the systematic trolling of him throughout the last few years has doubtless contributed to his degrading mental state (especially his extreme paranoia and distrust for almost everyone), the fact still remains that his life's horrible state is mainly caused by factors outside of the internet. He would still be a lonely outcast, as his poor upbringing gave him such warped views of the world and led him to engage in such bizarre behavior that he drove away every person he tried to connect with. He would still be living in unsanitary conditions due to Barb's hoarding and the fact that his house has not been properly cleaned in the better part of a decade. He would still be banned from most of his favorite hangouts due to his loitering and hostile behavior to other patrons. Also, at the core of it all is how Chris decided that he would be better off living off government handouts while he sits around playing with toys and video games instead of getting a job and heading down a career path, which would have been his one-way ticket to escaping the cesspool that is [[14 Branchland Court]] and living a fulfilling life, not unlike that of his half-brother. Instead, he decided to remain dependent on his elderly, emotionally disturbed parents; look how well that's working out for him.

True to his word, Chris all but abandoned the Internet between [[July 2012]] and [[2013]], save for sporadic ramblings on Facebook. Despite this, quite a bit was revealed about how well he was doing independent of troll influence. He [[Other_documents#Epistle_to_the_Wesley_Memorial_United_Methodist_Church|alienated himself from his church]], earning a ban from the new pastor (undoubtedly because Chris wouldn't shut the hell up about the trolls). After being banned, he even dismissed Rocky as an effective counselor (keep in mind that Rocky once bailed him out of jail, which is quite an extraordinary act of kindness, counselor or not), and went so far as to accuse [[Chris and religion|God]] of being a troll. He continues to this day to describe his life as isolated and lonely, with nobody willing to talk to him, a scenario many have tried and failed to warn him about. He even earned some ire from Anna, his biggest white knight for [[Facebook#Gay_Marriage|making anti-homosexual statements]] on his Facebook page, he even chose to argue with her instead of trying to piece together why a lesbian friend of his would find such statements offensive. As a coup de grace on all of this, Chris ended up trolling himself in the grandest fashion by revealing an [[Facebook#Imgur|Imgur account]] made of all of his previously hidden Facebook posts, despite trolls (save for the one who started it) being completely in the dark about it.

Even if all of that doesn't convince you for some reason, consider this: Chris came ''this'' close to being thrown in jail on [[28 October 2011]], and it's possible he'll end up there at last with the more recent [[26 December 2014]] incident, both of which involved the assault of innocent retail workers trying to protect their customers from him. Both times, he did this on his own initiative, with no prodding from the trolls. And make no mistake, ''everyone'' was thoroughly disgusted by Chris's actions, none were eager to defend his pepper-spray assault on an innocent employee, even those who helped support his [[Sonic Boom Protests]] before.

If we were to be extraordinarily generous and assume that none of the disasters which have befallen Chris since the trolling efforts began in earnest would otherwise have happened, the facts ''still'' indicate that Chris's life would have been a complete mess. Chris was discovered by the internet at large in late 2007, by which point he had already been suspended from college, and banned from the [[Fashion Square]] (twice), along with his local branches of [[Wal-Mart]] and [[Target]], only avoiding criminal charges for the ruckus he caused at the latter because the state didn't feel it was worth the effort to pursue the case. As recently as two months before the "official" start of the trolling of Chris, he was making death threats against Adam Stackhouse and his preteen sister, for the former's unwitting disruption of Chris's plan to lose his virginity with Megan, something that she had made clear she had no interest in doing. It may be a depressing conclusion to arrive at, but there's never been anything that anyone outside of the confines of 14 Branchland Court could have reasonably done to prevent Chris's life from being a trainwreck.

===Chris's white knights are making him worse===
A quick glance at the comments on his Facebook statuses should confirm this. Even after he ''committed a felony'' by assaulting a GameStop employee with pepper spray on Boxing Day 2014, then posted a long-winded, obviously dishonest tirade painting himself as an innocent victim on Facebook, none of his white knights offered anything more than a softly-worded, mild condemnation of his behavior. [[William Elliott Waterman|Some]] avoided a direct response altogether, and made some barely relevant comment that conspicuously avoided the main point of Chris's self-serving drivel, probably a feeble and misguided attempt to defuse his [[Chris and anger|rage]].

And this is how his white knights react whenever he gets angry about having to face the consequences of his own behavior. It's painfully clear to Chris's trolls and other observers that his white knights are woefully ill-equipped to deal with Chris. The reactions his tantrums garner from them clearly indicate that they remain ignorant (passively or otherwise) to facts that most learned long ago; namely, that the "soft touch" has never worked with Chris, and only serves to reinforce his [[Chris and reality|belief]] that [[Chris and his Ego|he should be given whatever he desires]] (he is even openly stating that he is ''entitled'' to a girlfriend), and allowed to do as he pleases, while [[Barbara Chandler|others]] shield him from the [[Chris and the Law|negative repercussions]].

Chris's white knights also habitually feed Chris's belief that his trolls are subhuman bullies who simply want to see him destroyed in every conceivable way because he's such a special, brave little boy. While this is [[A-Logging|true of]] [[Weening|some]], for the most part, Chris's trolls are just as interested in seeing Chris improve himself as white knights are, if not moreso, even if many are beginning to doubt such a thing is possible. Indeed, many of the female troll personas who "date" or "befriend" Chris have tried to help him see the error of his ways and reform, and continue to do so. It is partially due to the influence of Chris's white knights, who foolishly (and often futilely) try to root out these trolls, that these attempts to help Chris never result in lasting, positive change on his part.

In short, most of Chris's white knights are attention whores, sycophants or both. To these people, going on a witch-hunt for trolls is preferable to actually trying to help Chris, something which, ironically, even Chris's trolls continue to try to do.

==Examples==
:''Read: [[White knight emails]]''

===White Knights on YouTube===

Among the most notable of Chris's white knights was a [[YouTube]] counter-troll who claimed to be a 21 year-old Russian model named Svenka. Via her YouTube account, [http://www.youtube.com/user/hottiee96 hottiee96], she released an inordinate number of screencaps from troll conversations on [[Sonichu IRC]], including private conversations between Chris and Panda. She also released an image of the [[Man in the Pickle Suit]] who would later steal Chris's first date, [[Emily]]. Were Chris less thick-skulled and even slightly willing to accept irrefutable evidence, Svenka may have made somewhat of a negative impact on the organized trolling effort against Chris, but ultimately she was ineffectual. Svenka also had a unhealthy obsession with the [[CWCville Library]]'s original curator, Arjen Van Dierten.

On 6 [[May 2009]], YouTube user xThexPinchx/NorthxStar7/[http://www.youtube.com/user/ThePinchisDaBomb ThePinchisDaBomb] tried to blackmail major trolls, claiming to have information on them. He was easily called on his bluff by someone who had not trolled Chris at all.<ref>[http://www.youtube.com/user/softerthanhardware YouTube]</ref> The Pinch has also threatened [[BlueSpike]] saying he has information from his friends, forgetting the fact that BlueSpike ''has no friends''.

===White Knights on Facebook===

In recent times (since 2012), Chris has taken to using Facebook as his main means of expressing himself. Inevitably, this has not only attracted the attention of trolls, but, in 2013, a slew of White Knights as well, in particular, a [[William Elliott Waterman]], who taunted the trolls to come after him instead of Chris ('''Spoiler:''' Nobody did, because nobody actually cared what he had to say). Anna and [[Kim]] are two of the most notable ones on his friends list, both of whom try to offer constructive advice whenever Chris nosedives into a rant...when they're not busy kissing his ass, especially in the case of Anna.

However, as we've come to expect of Chris, anybody who tells him something he doesn't want to hear are people that needed to be brushed off until they stop saying those mean, awful things to him. A good case in point is his [[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Chris_Expresses_His_Outrage_for_Walmart|anger-laced tirade in September 2013, when he got thrown out of Walmart and started calling names]]. The white knights typically chimed in with their support...''until'' he revealed that he [[Chris and the law|vandalized]] an Xbox One display in the store. Several of them then told Chris that this was not right of him to do, and that the manager had every right to throw him out. His response to that?

{{quote|They do not.
And if they do, they are most in the wrong, [[Chris and reality|because they are most abusive and overzealous of their "authoritative power" that never has existed ever]].|- Chris's response to Chris Rhodes}}

===White Knights in Real Life===

Aside from the most obvious example, an old classmate of Chris from [[Manchester High School]] came online and attempted to defend Chris. Once [[SheCameForCWC.jpg|certain details]] became known, however, said classmate quickly backpedaled on this once he realized that the majority of [[CWCki|what happened]] was Chris' own fault.

===TV Tropes===
The TV Tropes [http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Webcomic/Sonichu article on ''Sonichu''] used to have a white knight message as the first text of the article, with a link back to this very page. It was eventually removed due to TV Tropes' website policy changing later on--in other words, said message would no longer be allowed on the website. The message is reproduced below:

{{quote|Hey Chris! If you're reading this: you seriously need to get help from licensed professionals, before the stuff you do gets you thrown in prison or forcibly committed. And we're sorry, but you have no real fans - the people you think are your fans are really either trolls or laughing at you behind your back. Every. Last. One. Please listen to us - for once.|- Concerned tropers}}

Unfortunately, the editor in question fails to realize that their message, while well intentioned, will do absolutely nothing and Chris will simply ignore it even if he does [[Mailbag 52|fully read and input it for better development. Thank you for your time.]]

==Conclusion==
As good as your intentions may be, there is no conceivable way any old e-friend can reach Chris at this point and change him for the better, certainly not by continuing to ass-pat and pamper him, which is precisely what fucked him up so badly in the first place (as this wiki evidences copiously). Your efforts will unfortunately fail, and he will just brush you aside, seeing no difference between you and the trolls, for daring to tell him anything he does not want to hear. With each new incident he causes, it is increasingly obvious that little short of [[Chris and psychology|professional intervention]], the [[Chris and religion|intercession of]] [[GodJesus]], or a [[Destruction Of Chris's House|horrifyingly close brush with death]] will change him.

Though the trolls have certainly tried to be a positive influence on Chris, even they are now largely admitting that Chris is well beyond our aid. They have spent years trying to pierce Chris's many insulating layers of self-deceit, egotism and sheer stubbornness. It is worth bearing in mind that it is these people, not the white knights, that are the closest thing he has to friends, and that some of them have been at this for nearly a decade. They ''know'' him, and if they can't make Chris change, what on earth makes you think you can?

To conclude, with Chris's paranoia, detachment from reality, outlandish behavior and bellicosity all becoming steadily more severe, and with interventions by trolls and white knights alike failing, the best we can hope for is that Chris causes [[26 December 2014|some sort of trouble]] that leads to him receiving the help he needs.

==See also==
*[[A-Logging]]
*[[Weening]]
*[[White knight E-mails]]

==References==
<references />

==External links==
* [http://encyclopediadramatica.se/White_knight White Knighting] article at [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]].

[[Category:People]]
[[Category:Trolling]]

Patreon

2016-12-02T11:15:08Z

Caldymugs:

[[File:Cwc patreon announcement.jpeg|thumb|Note his use of someone else's fanart to promote his profile.]]

'''Patreon''' is a website where users can request donations. It has extremely liberal definitions for fundraising goals and does not impose consequences on creators who fail to deliver,<ref>[[https://patreon.zendesk.com/hc/en-us/articles/212995103-What-do-I-do-if-a-creator-didn-t-deliver-a-reward-or-stopped-posting-content-]]</ref>, making this yet another platform for Chris to [[Etsy|get paid without doing work]], much like his current Support button on YouTube.

Chris joined on 30 November 2016. He made multiple mistakes on setting up the account, showing that he has a tenuous grasp on how Patreon works. He chose to ''limit'' big-ticket donations to once per month. He offered redundant gifts for any donors above the $50 mark. He also used someone else's fanart of Sonichu and Rosechu for his account profile.

He was "hesitant" to join the site.<ref>[[November 2016 Facebook posts#Too lazy for Patreon]]</ref> On 28 November, he said, "I am unable to offer gifts and whatnot, even previews," because he lost his inspiration after Lulu.com banned him from its site for selling [[Sonichu|fan fiction]] in December 2015.<ref>[[November 2016 Facebook posts#You jerks]]</ref> It was an unusual display of self-awareness from Chris, in that he admitted he would have difficulty meeting his goals. It was in contrast to his time as a seller on [[Etsy]], during which he accepted orders while having a large backlog due to spending too much time on the [[PS4]], which led to the forced closure of his shop for failure to send products.

However, just two days after his initial post on Patreon, he [[November 2016 Facebook posts#Barb pawns jewelry, Chris decides to join Patreon|changed his mind]] after Barb had to pawn a necklace, which she had to sell at a significant loss for $325, due to the [[Financhu Crisis]].

==Overview==
The full title of the account is "[[List of Chris's lies|Christine Chandler is creating Sonichu and Rosechu Official Comic Books and Products]]."

Chris embedded [[Patreon announcement]].

{{quotebox|I am the original creator of Sonichu and Rosechu, Christine Weston Chandler, also known as Christian, Christopher, Chris Chan and so forth among my fan base and many trolls and cyber bullies on the internet since 2000. I have drawn and colored more than eleven books worth of stories, content and so forth, as well as my own official Sonichu and Rosechu figures and merchandise. I am looking to expand, officially, and in person/face-to-face; not long-distant over the internet. (Too many phonies and fakers)

I still reside with my mother and our dogs and cats, and we have a slew of financial problems, alongside a number of being the victim of internet trolls, blackmail and deception, and so forth, that have long emotionally and mentally scarred me greatly. My creativity has been affected, and the only resolve, I feel, is less worries hanging over my head. And the home finances are a start that I'd like very much to resolve, including the mortgage and debts. And that is why I am here on Patreon, to hopefully free our household of all that financial stress and find better peace of mind for myself to better be able to create again.

**The $250,000.00 Goal is the full amount goal; I had not intended to that to be a Montly Amount, but the altogether Goal, in general. My apologies for the confusion there.

The extra $50K in the goal is for allowance for room, and for saving for future rainy day(s).}}

==Goals==
{{quotebox|$250,000 per month

Pay off ALL of my home's finances, including the [[Chris and money|Mortgage and Credit Cards]], so I can feel better peace of mind and less weight long-time [[HippoOnYourHead|hanging over my head like many hippopotamuses]], and will feel better able to draw, color, create and so forth of my very own Sonichu and Rosechu.}}

==Rewards==

Chris's reward section of Patreon is filled with ludicrous stretch-goals, where one will find themselves having more or less the same benefits from pledging $50 a month as pledging $100,000 a month, once again showing Chris's inability to comprehend finances; or he just lazily copy and pasted each of the goals.

Those who pledge should notice just how shit Chris treats, well, everyone. Pledge an incredible amount of money and you will be allowed to make '''1 video request''', and it must adhere to Chris's strict guidelines. Even someone donating a small fortune every month isn't allowed the freedom to request a video on what they want.

It is also worth noting that donators giving $50 or more every month will be allowed to add Chris on Skype. This will give [[weens]] who enjoy burning money to have "direct" contact with Chris, however it is unknown just how frequently he uses Skype, if at all. More likely, his inbox will just be filled up with hundreds of [[Weening|JUUULLLAYYY]]'s and other nonsense that will just be ignored when he signs into Skype.

The Rewards:

{{quotebox|
'''$50 or more per month'''

*One Skylander card of myself, Christine Weston Chandler, playable in Skylanders Imaginators (Allow up to two months time, for the time of collecting your pledge and shipment)
*Can request one video that I will create, maximum of fifteen to thirty minutes; Nothing Offensive or Pervasive in content; all curse words will be censored. Copy Pasta allowed within reason.
*Allow adding me onto their Skype
*Access to patron-only content
*Sneak peek photos of upcoming releases
*Patron-only polls

'''$100 or more per month'''

*One Skylander T-Shirt of myself, Christine Weston Chandler, available in Blue or White and Youth Small to Adult 3X (Allow up to two months time, for the time of collecting your pledge and shipment)
*One Skylander card of myself, Christine Weston Chandler.
*Can request one video that I will create, maximum of fifteen to thirty minutes; Nothing Offensive or Pervasive in content; all curse words will be censored. Copy Pasta allowed within reason.
*Add Me on Skype
*Plus all previous rewards

'''$500.00 Donation''' ''Chris accidentally entered this under the $50 donation tier''
*One Skylander Figure of myself, Christine Weston Chandler, playable in Skylanders Imaginators (Allow up to two months time, for the time of collecting your pledge and shipment)
*One Skylander T-Shirt of myself, Christine Weston Chandler
*One Skylander card of myself, Christine Weston Chandler
*All Above items will be autographed
*The custom video
*Allow adding me onto their Skype
*Personalized song/video message

'''$1,000 or more per month'''

*One 3D-Printed Skylander Figure of myself, Christine Weston Chandler
*One Skylander T-Shirt of myself, Christine Weston Chandler.
*One Skylander card of myself, Christine Weston Chandler.
*All above items will be autographed.
*Can request one video that I will create, maximum of fifteen to thirty minutes; Nothing Offensive or Pervasive in content; all curse words will be censored. Copy Pasta allowed within reason.
*Add Me on Skype
*Plus all previous rewards

'''$10,000 or more per month'''

*Can request one video that I will create, maximum of fifteen to thirty minutes; Nothing Offensive or Pervasive in content; all curse words will be censored. Copy Pasta allowed within reason.
*Add Me on Skype
*Plus all previous rewards

'''Faster Creation Recovery - $100,000 or more per month'''
*Nearly Halfway to the Goal; Happy Day! I would feel a lot better.
*Can request one video that I will create, maximum of fifteen to thirty minutes; Nothing Offensive or Pervasive in content; all curse words will be censored. Copy Pasta allowed within reason.
*Add Me on Skype
*Plus all previous rewards

'''Fastest to Immediate Creation Recovery - $200,000 or more per month'''

*After paying off EVERYONE, Swiftest Creation Recovery!
*Can request one video that I will create, maximum of fifteen to thirty minutes; Nothing Offensive or Pervasive in content; all curse words will be censored. Copy Pasta allowed within reason.
*Add Me on Skype
*Plus all previous rewards
}}

==Updates==
*[http://archive.is/BdI2t 1 December] - Chris added Skylanders products to the gift offerings on the $50-$1,000 tiers. He added $500 as a tier, but screwed up and entered it under the $50 category. He also clarified the Overview section by explaining that he had intended the $250,000 to be a total goal, rather than a monthly one, showing that Chris still has unrealistic views on how much he can scam out of people.

==See also==
*[[Financhu Crisis]]
*[[Chris and money]]

==Sources==
<references/>

==External links==
*[https://www.patreon.com/user?u=4525122 Chris's Patreon]
*[http://archive.is/8Vr5K An archive of the page on its first day]

{{Template:The Internet}}

White knight

2016-11-28T20:57:25Z

Caldymugs:

{{Articleofthenow}}
 
[[Image:White knight.jpg|center]]
[[Image:Jack's Knight as William Spicer.jpg|thumb|right|180px|Artist's conception.]]

{{quote|Isn't there a white knight upon a fiery steed?|[[If You Were a Woman and I Was a Man|Bonnie Tyler]], "[[Holding Out for a Hero]]"}}

'''White knight''' is a term used to describe someone who goes on [[the Internet]] to help or defend someone else against other people, out of [[CWC is Sad|pity or compassion]], or for [[China|ulterior motives]]. White knighting of [[Chris]] is especially prevalent because of the sheer volume of abuse he's taken ever since he found his [[Encyclopedia Dramatic]] page, which in turn is caused by Chris's total unwillingness to heed any of his many white knights.

'''Counter-trolls''' are those who take Chris's side to spite his [[trolls]]. Some do this because trolling one gullible idiot is less satisfying than trolling trolls, who actually have the ability to understand what is going on. Others have decided that Chris has jumped the shark and are trying to make everyone else leave him alone to put a stop to an old meme. Counter-trolls are not to be confused with [[anti-troll]]s, who fight trolls in order to get closer to Chris and troll him themselves.

In the broader internet trolling community, a wide range of people, from neutral observers to even his greatest trolls, are accused of being white knights. This is mostly due to Chris's "fans" discouraging [[Weening]] and [[A-Logging]], acts which, to outside observers, could be misinterpreted as an attempt to reduce trolling. Many of these outside observers are also confused by the tendency of Chris's trolls, including his most [[Vivian Gee|prolific]] [[Clyde Cash|ones]], trying to get him to improve his life, as they don't know Chris well enough to know it's nigh impossible to get him to improve using the "soft touch". So when the label "white knight" gets thrown around, take it with a grain of salt.

A meta-topic within the broader Chris saga has been the merits of attempting to help Chris stop being a lolcow, and whether he is deserving of such assistance, or even beyond help. Once upon a time, the consensus on forums such as the talk page for Chris's ED article, [[/cwc/]], [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (message board)|PVCC]], and [[Sonichu (IRC chat)|#sonichu]] was that Chris's [[racism]], [[Homos|homophobia]], and [[Chris and his Ego|narcissism]] made him beneath contempt; and that he has consistently refused to take advice given to him in good faith.

Today, however, Chris's racism and homophobia are slowly ebbing away along with his parents' influence over him, and A-Logging is no longer as fashionable as it once was. Accordingly, nowadays, opinion on the matter is somewhat divided on whether Chris is capable of improvement, although most agree that if Chris is going to improve, it will not be in any large part due to the efforts of third parties because, in the main, he is still too proud and stubborn to accept advice.

Some believe that Chris is improving on his own, albeit slowly and in small increments, as seen in his gradual abandonment of his homophobia, which began with him declaring tolerance for lesbians, which he eventually extended to gay men. Others believe that Chris has not tangibly improved, that he has merely moved sideways, rather than forward. Many of these believe that Chris cannot improve, for example, his [[tugboat]], his public misadventures and the thorough documentation of his sordid dealings online make employment all but an impossibility for Chris. Many more quibble over what can be defined as Chris "improving". Some have proposed that Chris improving need not necessarily mean becoming a functioning adult, which at this stage would be an uphill battle for Chris anyway. Rather, they claim that Chris is improving in that he is happier than he once was. He has found [[Impulse Gay Social Club|a new hangout]] where he stands to improve his social skills and make friends. Moreover, he has finally found a way to cash in on his e-fame, delighted his fanbase by resuming the comics ''and'' made his dreams of a Sonichu media empire a reality, albeit probably on a much smaller scale than he once envisaged.

In any case, the consensus on white knights and counter-trolls has remained somewhat consistent; they are and always have been seen as wasting everyone's time by trolls and Christorians alike, who accordingly have little patience for them.

==Motives==

===Pity===
Following the release of Chris's first [[nudes]] and the [[Chris Chan Update 21 October 2008|video]] in which he reacted to the loss of his [[medallion]]s and [[Blanca]], many people, including trolls, felt sorry for him. They had not expected it to be possible for him to be trolled so hard or for him to appear so shattered.

===Empathy===
The internet is full of [[autistic]] people, manchildren, and self-absorbed morons. Many of them are right here, fascinated with Chris. All of them see something of themselves in him, whether it's his [[obesity]], his all-consuming need for female companionship, or his fervent belief that his homemade comics matter. A lot of white knights have made at least some of the mistakes Chris has made and have since wised up. They think they can help improve Chris by offering the benefit of their experience.

===Circumstances beyond Chris's control===
Chris fails to identify people, a possible sign of [[Wikipedia:Prosopagnosia|prosopagnosia]]. [[BlueSpike|Julie and her brother Max]] used the same voice, and yet Chris couldn't recognize that they were the same person. Pictures of different women were used to depict Blanca, and yet Chris thought they were the same person. Chris believed that pictures of [[Wikipedia:Megan Fox|Megan Fox]] were of [[Vanessa Hudgens]].<ref>[[Vanessa AIM Chat 9|Vanessa AIM Chat IX]]</ref> In high school, Chris memorized his appearance in the mirror because he had trouble recognizing himself.<ref>[[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]] - [http://thedailypos.org/misc/sonichu/Issue%207/SchuComic8Page24.jpg "...I had to train my brain to visually remember what I looked like..."]</ref> Since he's never "updated" his self-image, this is a possible explanation regarding why he denies being fat.

Chris' autism also means that he thinks, and sees the world, in simplistic, binary terms; he cannot easily "read between the lines" or detect sarcasm, or practically any kind of nuance or subtlety. He interprets ''[[Family Guy]]'' as being against homosexuality.<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate March 10th, 2009]]</ref> When 2 male acquaintances exchanged sarcastic homosexual remarks, Chris concluded that they were gay.<ref>Anecdote by [[Mimms]].</ref> It is also thought that his decision to go [[tomgirl]] was at least partially due to him taking advice to "get in touch with his feminine side" literally.

===The trolls are even worse people than Chris===
Another frequently heard line of reasoning is that the trolls have gone way too far, and have demonstrated that they're even worse than Chris, or at least equally pathetic. For example, BlueSpike's sadistic abuse of his control over Chris [[BLUESPIKE#Encyclopedia_Dramatica_Troll_War|outraged even trolls]]. The [[JULAAAY|less sophisticated]] bulk of the trolling was the work of A-Logs and weens, who are frowned upon even by trolls, and rightfully so. And, of course, who really has no life here: Chris, or the people who [[CWCki|obsessively document and debate everything he does]]?

===For the sake of [[Barbara]]'s sanity===
At this point in time it is safe to say that Chris's remaining parent has been just as fatigued as Chris by the actions of trolls. Some argue that Snorlax should not have to suffer for his wrongdoings, and therefore think that Chris should be left alone just so she can enjoy the last few years of her life in peace.

==Reasons against white knighting==
===Chris could have ended the trolling whenever he wanted to, but didn't===
All Chris had to do to end the trolling was to stop responding to it. If he had taken this small step, [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] would've made his ED page and that probably would've been the end of it. The first trolls had nothing personal against Chris; they just decided he was a worthy target after reading his [[Sonichu (comic)|crappy ''Sonichu'' comics]] and seeing him go into a meltdown over his ED page. If he'd quit responding to their provocations and quit posting [[12 October 2009|videos of himself throwing tantrums]] on [[YouTube]], the trolls would have eventually just moved on to someone else. Instead, Chris tried to "fight back" against them, in turn revealing more and more of his personal information, until eventually the trolls knew all of his contact info and all the details of his life.

That was when the trolling went past a point of no return, spilling into Chris' personal life so much that there would be absolutely no way for him to ever disassociate himself from it. Even when he was away from the computer, he would find himself subjected to trolls calling his cell phone, sending him mail, and following him around in public. While the obsessive trolling was nothing less than shitty, the fact still remains that Chris was the one who allowed them to have such control over his life; thanks to him always overreacting to every little provocation and handing over all his personal information to them.

There is also the theory that Chris does things for trolls to mock him merely for the attention.

===Chris lacks empathy himself===
:''See also: [[Chris and death]], [[Autism]] and [[Chris and his Ego]].''
Chris cannot put himself in your shoes or accept that you have been where he is. He has no "theory of mind": if you used to be as shy around women as he is today, in his mind the fact that you aren't shy anymore makes your experience inapplicable to his situation. To Chris, the fact you got over it and he hasn't yet makes the two cases entirely different. He doesn't want to solve his problems by trying what worked for you, he only wants you to pity him for having problems, until he magically dreams up [[Dating education|his own solution]]. In recent years, many have even began to opine that Chris doesn't even ''want'' help; as can be observed in his frequent outbursts on Facebook, what he really wants is to exploit his own misfortune to get pity, attention and gifts. It is also theorized that helping him is pointless because Chris is well-known for always wanting to have his cake and eat it. Even if he woke up tomorrow morning and found that all of his dreams had come true, he'd still concoct new grievances.

:'''RocketFox:''' My father died of liver cancer and cirrohosis a day ago ;~; he drank a ton and it hurt him - I'm only 11 and I dunno what to do ;~;
:'''Chris:''' RocketFox, you will soon recover from your father's accident, I guess it is; DO NOT DRINK Alcohol yourself; STAY OFF THAT JUNK.<ref>[[IRC (16 October 2008)]]</ref>

Chris's interpretation of the death of RocketFox's dad as an accident shows that he didn't even bother to look up what cirrhosis is. Immediately after this, he started talking about a sexy dance. And 8 months later, he was filmed enjoying some [[Long Island Iced Tea]].

Chris's reactions to suicide are very telling. After hearing that he caused [[Ryan Cash]] to die, Chris marveled at the fact that he had incited suicide, right after he tried to publicly console [[Clyde Cash]].<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate December 28th, 2008]]</ref> When he heard that he made [[Sarah May]] attempt suicide, his reasons for her to stay alive were "I'd feel terrible" and "I'd just cry."<ref>[[Mumble 8|Mumble #8]]</ref><ref>[[CWC Shout Out to Sarah May]]</ref> When Chris broke up with [[Ivy]], he somehow concocted, in his head, an assumption that she had committed suicide. Even after having lost so many dear friends to suicide, he still had no problems telling Clyde and [[Jack Thaddeus]] to [[death threats|kill themselves]]. People who have had to deal with suicidal people, or have lost relatives or friends to suicide wouldn't exactly find this amusing.

In the [[Common_Questions#22_February_2010|22 February 2010]] edition of the [[CWCipedia]]'s "Common Questions", Chris listed the top ten worst things to have ever happened to him. The deaths of "two True and Good Women who [he] had friendships with," [[PandaHalo]] and [[Sarah Jackson]], ranked seventh. Those tragic events ranked below getting banned from a game store, finding out two people from said store were posting info about him on ED, and having his personal websites hacked.

On 1 [[November 2009]], Chris went as far as to mock '''9/11''' (more on ''that'' video can be found in the "Chris is beyond pity section").

When Rashid Ali Abdul, an Iranian [[fan]], told him that her country's religious authorities sentenced her to death by beheading for reading ''Sonichu'', Chris simply said that he was "sorry" and that the situation was "pitiful".<ref>[[Mailbag 8|Mailbag #8]]</ref>

While some of this can be attributed to Chris's [[autism]], a condition that often results in a lack of empathy, most autistics can at least learn how to express empathy through a combination of carefully reading the emotions of others and thinking about how a situation affects other people, but Chris refuses to seek serious counseling or psychiatric help for this sort of thing, and was clearly given little-to-no help with his autism as he grew up.

===Autism does not excuse a terrible person===
Chris knows he has trouble understanding non-verbal social cues due to his autism,<ref>[[Quizzes#Autism Quiz]]</ref> and yet he still jumps the gun on interpreting other people's intentions all the time.

Autism, in and of itself, does not create a failure as massive as Chris. A majority of autistics manage to get psychiatric help for their problem and/or are able to develop social and emotional skills so they can cope with their disability and lead rewarding and rich lives. While Chris acknowledges he has a problem, he has never done anything more than see the [[Rocky Shoemaker|pastoral counselor]] at his church, who is not a professional trained in the treatment of autism spectrum disorders, and whom he eventually dismissed anyway.<ref>[[Vivian's AIM chat]]</ref>

After he [[26 December 2014|maced a GameStop employee and said it made him feel "badass"]], a deeply concerned troll going by the name Renee tried to convince him to go to see a psychiatrist. In response, Chris took this as a personal insult, and wished "Renee" and her boyfriend a slow demise in a house fire. Not only does this demonstrate that Chris holds his ego in higher esteem than his mental health, but it is also quite staggering that he would wish death in a fire upon someone [[Destruction Of Chris's House|''after he narrowly escaped the same fate'']]. Moreover, it is worth noting that Chris remembered that Renee had told him in the past that she already had a boyfriend. Compare his reaction to this well-meaning request from Renee, to his compliance with more bizarre requests from, say, Jackie. This shows that regardless of who you are or what you want to say, Chris only cares to listen to you if you have a [[china]] and aren't already taken.

Chris is fully capable of understanding the consequences of his actions. He has a sense of morality, even if he often ignores it in favor of his own interests. He has been held accountable for his own actions in a court of law, twice (and rightfully so). His racism and chauvinism have nothing to do with his autism.

===Chris is beyond pity===
[[Image:Chrischantwoface.jpg|thumb|right|Chris's mood is all over the place, even between videos posted shortly after each other. From "[[Happy Sonichu Day|Thank you for your support]]" to "[[Chris Drops the N-Bomb|Goddamn womanizing raping...trollin' stupid pickle-suited...'''nigger'''!]]"]]

Chris often reacts to provocation aggressively, which is quite an understandable (if not acceptable) response to trolling. However, "provocation" doesn't necessarily mean harassment or trolling. Merely disagreeing with Chris's opinions, asking him why he does what he does, or as evidenced above, trying to expose him to reality can provoke an attack, up to and including threats of violence and death. When Chris is annoyed, frustrated, or overcome by desire or lust, he's capable of doing [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|''unpleasant'']] things. Moreover, when Chris loses it, he doesn't think of the consequences of his actions at all, and his expressions of outrage are completely out of proportion to the provocation — often more outrageous in themselves than whatever the trolls did. Chris believes that since he is reacting to being "wronged" by someone else, his actions, no matter how extreme they are, are justified.

Chris has [[Yu-Gi-Oh!|insulted young children]] during card games and scared some of them away from [[The GAMe PLACe]]. [[Mimms]] and [[Lucas]], who frequented the now-defunct store and knew Chris in real life years before he was discovered by ED, couldn't list any redeeming qualities he possessed.

Chris has sexually harassed [[Megan|two]] [[Catherine|women]] in real life. The former made it explicitly clear to him that his inappropriate touching and comments to her were unacceptable, but he continued anyway, convinced that eventually she would learn to love being molested by a mentally ill manchild and would become his [[sweetheart from the ground-up]]. He ''bragged'' to the latter about how he learned to keep his hands to himself after the fallout with Megan, then faceplanted her breasts.

After Megan cut ties with Chris for uploading [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|a drawing of him fingerbanging her]] to his ED page, he did not apologize,<ref name="Megan Saga">[http://encyclopediadramatica.se/Chris-chan/Megan_Saga Megan Saga]</ref> but rather explained to her (in a terribly [[naïve]] way) how a handjob works, under the misguided assumption that she merely was upset because she didn't recognize the sex act being performed, or in the hope that she would rationalize what he did on this basis. When this failed to placate her, he then had the nerve to say "I am hurting SOOOOO MUCH MORE than you can be."<ref name="Megan Saga"/> Why? Not because of the picture, but because the trolls were being mean to him. Yes, ''[[Ego|him]]''. Based on [[List of Chris's ED edits|his ED edits]], he was more concerned with people thinking he was fingering his [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|imaginary twin sister]] than he was with defending Megan's honor.

Years later, Chris would go so far as to totally demonize Megan for rejecting his 'good intentions', posting her address up on his [[Facebook]] profile in the hopes that trolls would find it and punish her for him. On 3 and 4 October 2013, he took this even further, posting [[October_2013_Facebook_Posts#Megagi_La_Skunk_agrees_that_you_should_have_never_been_born|an unbelievable multi-part tirade]] about Megan on Facebook, wherein he accused her of being the leader of a vast troll conspiracy against him and claimed to have consorted with a ''[[Chris and reality|fictional]] [[Megagi La Skunk|character]]'' Megan once made for him, who supposedly told Chris that Megan [[Sandy|should never have been born]]. As if this wasn't enough insanity on its own, Chris then went on to claim he had confiscated the [[Sailor Megtune]] superpowers he had given her in the comics, and proceeded to demand that Megan fix his entire life, or else he would sic the spirits of his deceased father and dog on her.

After each of his online relationships ends, Chris starts looking for a new [[sweetheart]] right away, ''even if she died''. No matter the setback, his ego just keeps getting bigger.

In mid-July 2009, he addressed a person named [[The July 10th Messages|"SonichuIzCool"]] on YouTube. SonichuIzCool is probably the ''only'' genuine fan of ''Sonichu'' discovered to date, someone who tried to defend Chris and his comic. She was also genuinely mentally disabled. In his YouTube message, Chris called her "naïve and [[slow in the mind]]." He told her she had to "come out where [he] can meet [her]." Another side of this incident is that his YouTube account had been recently hacked, and he had managed to recover it this time, thus avoiding whatever damage the trolls ''might'' have caused. Poetically, after he posted this video, he got his account suspended due to ''his own actions''. SonichuIzCool didn't step down, and responded back with a video that criticized his actions. To date, Chris has never issued a response to that, thus meaning he was dismantled by a slow-in-the-mind.

On 1 November 2009, in his attempt to blackmail Clyde Cash, Chris went so far as to create a YouTube video called [[Twin Falling Towers]], wherein he ''mocks 9/11''. When feeling angry at Clyde Cash, he not only thought it would be a good idea to blackmail him, but used the ''destruction of two skyscrapers full of people after being hit by airliners full of jet fuel and terrorists'' as a metaphor for how weak he thought Clyde was. He even used his mouse cursor as a "plane" and made childish explosion noises. When people got angry, he tried to fix things by turning the World Trade Center towers into [[Cakefarts|cake]] candles. To the best of anyone's knowledge, Chris was never coaxed or encouraged by an outside source to use the Twin Tower images. He came up with this reprehensible idea all on his own.

[[Image:MikesWedding.jpg|thumb|right|Happily forever after.]]

In January 2010, a "fan" named Mike Jackson asked Chris for advice, whether he should [[Mailbag 31#If your kids are 16 or 17, you should watch porn with them|watch pornography with his family]] and [[Mailbag 35#In which Chris advises a father to buy his son whores|buy a prostitute for his son]], Mike Junior, or not. Chris, being such an [[Dating Education|"expert"]], encouraged him to do so. When "Mike" got back to him, the news wasn't good; Mike Jr. ran away with the prostitute, and Mike Sr. begged Chris to make a [[YouTube]] video asking his son to come home. Unfortunately, Chris was under a lot of [[stress]], and could not make the video. Chris was next contacted by Mike's "wife", who told him that after discovering that Mike Jr. had married the prostitute in Las Vegas, Mike Sr. died from a sleeping pill overdose. Chris didn't even give a damn about the obituary linked by Mike's widow, offering her his infamous canned response in lieu of even pretending to give a fuck, then later responded to Mike's son's grief and anger with all of three words: [[Chris and remorse|"I am sorry."]] When called out later, he denied having ever spoken to Mike, much less read his obituary. While this was all obviously trolling, Chris's nonchalant reaction to his hypothetically ruining someone's life and tearing their family apart doesn't exactly paint him in a good light.

In the post [[Tomgirl_Saga| Tomgirl saga]] world of Chris some trolls have shown remorse over past trollings of Chris. Some cite Chris' new minority gender identity and his infamous autism as reasons to be more sympathetic to Chris. However, Chris has never shown respect for other transgendered people, but has been outright transphobic [[Doxing Jeff/Francine|by refusing to acknowledge their identity]] or [[I Am me; He is not| using slurs against them]]. This does not stop Chris demanding that people respect his new found gender identity without a hint of self-awareness. Chris has made it clear he doesn't have respect for others even if they share very similar problems or experiences like him. Even post tomgirl Chris has also gone on record refusing to date anyone transgendered or with autism. Chris hates those who are similar to him for bringing his insecurities and imperfections to light and will lash out at them for it.

Any reason you might could find for believing you can save Chris is only fooling yourself. Chris has willfully chosen to become a leech on society and any of many people listed on this wiki who had taken pity on him. He goes from person to person and community to community only to take what ever he feels entitled to from them, and then throw a temper tantrum when they expel him for unacceptable behavior. To illustrate this point, many of the people Chris has hated the most were not trolls or cruel to him, but simply had gotten in the way of things he wanted regardless if it was intentional or not. For example, [[Wes Iseli]] for dating a girl he liked, [[Adam Stackhouse]] for winning a contest he wanted to win, or [[Mary Lee Walsh]] for prohibiting his [[attraction sign]] on campus. This is a cycle that anyone who has followed Chris' misadventures is familiar with and it is safe to say your efforts to change or help him will be no different. Chris needs professional and perhaps Institutional help. Anonymous strangers as well meaning as they may are not equipped with the proper recourses to help Chris, especially as Chris continues [[List of places that have banned Chris| to get banned throughout Charlottesville]] many times without the help of trolls or weens.

===Chris cares only for himself===
Chris spends [[monthly tugboat|your tax money]] on luxuries and steals from his parents to buy [[PSN|random video games]] he'll never play, and even DLC for ''games he doesn't own''. He has the basic skills necessary to hold down a job, so long as it doesn't require him to do much interacting with other people. Programs exist specifically to find appropriate jobs for the mentally challenged, but Chris hasn't even tried since being fired from [[Wendy's]]. He's never going to get a job now, of course - what with his various run-ins with the law, his growing local reputation for public tantrums and violence, his social security, and the fact that he's in his thirties, and has only been employed for a month or so in his entire life, over a decade ago - but he missed a lot of opportunities while it was still possible. Had he made the right choices, he could've been on a career path and out of his ancestral cesspool by now.

Further reinforcing his selfishness and laziness, Chris and his family strongly agree it's better for him to hole up in his room and get paid for doing absolutely nothing than to accept the challenge of finding gainful employment in the real world. This is based on the false assertion that Chris can earn more on disability than from a job. By taking advantage of the government through vastly exaggerated claims of an easily manageable illness which they refuse to help Chris treat, Chris's parents are assured a steady income in the form of his room-and-board payments, and don't have to worry about Chris getting in trouble with the law [[Chris and the Law|again]] when he has another breakdown in public.

But just in case you needed any solid proof of Chris' outright selfishness, it basically came straight from the horse's mouth during his trial. When asked if he understood that he'll be paying his court fees:

{{quote| "Yes. My mother will be taking care of that." |Chris.<ref>[[This_is_how_the_Trial_went]]</ref>}}

Keep in mind that the money being used to bail him out of a mess that he caused is coming out of an ailing old widow's purse while Chris [[Chris and Money|nonchalantly throws his own money away]], as evidenced by his PSN activity mere months later. Also, in 2013, [[Facebook#I_have_had_more_freedom_when_my_father_was_alive|he further hammers this point home]] by complaining about having to take care of Barb with Bob's passing, concerned more about his free time and Michael Snyder taking his money away.

===Chris is not a good net citizen===
{{quote|I will have NO DISCUSSIONS GOING ON BEHIND MY BACK ON MY OWN WEBSITE WHATSOEVER!|Chris, on reader participation via [[Twitter]].}}
Chris is more concerned with spreading his own [[honest content]] than being a good net citizen. On the internet, his demeanor is comparable to that of a spammer: who cares about things like terms of service and account suspensions and masses of pissed-off people as long as his message gets through? He won't participate in the communities of the sites he posts on. This is not mere ''passivity'' in those communities, which is generally tolerable; he ''deliberately opposes'' such participation. Most people, while not bothering to contribute to communities, would at least not make deliberate efforts to hinder them. On [[deviantART]], [[YouTube]] and [[Flipnote Hatena]], he disables all comments, probably because he knew he'd not get any praise anyway, yet this ignores the fact that open commenting is part of the nature of these sites and disabling comments should be done only if it's being used for flagrant abuses of the system, like spam, excessive trolling, and votebotting. He regards YouTube purely as a video publishing venue and not as a tool for engaging in discussion with his "fans". He created his [[Wikipedia]] user page purely to spread his own message, and did not come to the site to participate in building an encyclopedia. If the site owners block him, he just comes up with another account or a sockpuppet. Thoughts of apologizing, getting old accounts reinstated, or the possibility that people who block him might be trying to send him a message never cross his mind.

Chris's behavior on the CWCipedia provides many more examples of his selfish attitude, such as the banner ad crisis in late 2009. He doesn't understand what it ''really'' means that the website is neither hosted nor paid for by him personally, and what sort of things the administration typically does on a website like his. He can't or won't understand simple principles like "webhost's house, webhost's rules," or "beggars can't be choosers," but instead believes that since the site has his name on it, it should be run according to his every demand.

===Chris will reject your advice===
[[Image:0231-MrsSanfordsWiseWords.jpg|thumb|right|What are you going to tell Chris that his [[Virginia Jeanine Sanford|favorite teacher]] didn't tell him 20 years ago?]]
Someone [[White knight E-mails|carefully explained to Chris why he is a sexist]]. In response, Chris got angry. He is only interested in a guide on how to attract women without first making any changes to himself. Most ridiculously: he denies being [[Obesity|overweight]].

If you ever get some free time, read Vivian Gee's AIM chat. Vivian actually used to be a counter-troll, and warned Chris several times that PandaHalo was a troll. Chris fell for Panda anyway. She then tried to talk some damn sense into him over AIM. But Chris proved to be so goddamn stubborn, she actually tossed the towel and became a troll out of spite. In her words:

{{quote|i've tried for 3 hours now; it's like fighting a wall, i can't beat the wall no matter how hard i try.|Vivian, thoroughly summing up how it feels to try to smack some sense into Chris.}}

Not only has she long since joined the troll ranks, but Chris even began [[Sign Destruction Video|berating and sending threats]] to the woman who was once his biggest defender ever.

===Chris will reject your disclosure of the truth===
* [[Hanna]] was a real-life troll, and Chris fell for it.
* [[Lori Lopez]] was a real-life troll, and Chris fell for it.
* Blanca was the name of more than a few trolls, and Chris fell for it.
* PandaHalo was a troll, and Chris fell for it, despite Vivian's warnings.<ref>[[Vivian Gee E-mails]]</ref>
* [[Robert Simmons V]] was a troll, and Chris fell for it.
* [[JK Productions]] was a troll pretending to be an entire video game development company, and Chris fell for it.
* Sarah May was a troll, and Chris fell for it.
* [[Sarah Jackson]] was a troll, and Chris fell for it.
* [[Shigeru Miyamoto]] was a troll, and Chris fell for it.
* Julie was a troll, and Chris fell for it.
* Ivy was a troll, and Chris fell for it, despite warnings from the counter-troll that must not be named.
* [[Vanessa Hudgens]] was a troll, and Chris fell for it.
* [[Emily]] was a real-life troll, and Chris fell for it.
* [[Kacey]] was a troll, and Chris fell for it. She also married [[Liquid Chris]].
** [[Father Call|Kacey's dad]] was a troll, and Chris fell for it.
* [[Jackie]] was a troll, and Chris fell for it. [[February_2012|Twice.]]
* [[Catherine]] was a real-life troll, and Chris fell for it, despite [[Anna McLerran|Anna]]'s warnings.

See a pattern here? Back in the day, Chris would've simply dismissed any attempt to open his eyes to the obvious as an attempt to "ruin his relationship/business partnership for the lulz".

As of 2012, however, it seems that Chris has done a 180 on this, where, out of [[Autism|sheer paranoia]], he believes that anybody<ref>[[:File:Fbp10.png]]</ref> and everybody<ref>[[:File:Fbp6.png]]</ref> is a troll, even when he has no sane reason to reach that conclusion<ref>[[:File:Koreans.PNG]]</ref>.

Surprisingly, even in [[2014]], it was revealed that his latest girlfriend, Catherine, was a troll construct. While [[CWCki Forums|the community observing Chris]] are [[Trolls#Today|no longer impressed]] by such [[weening]], it still shows that even after almost a decade of trolls leading him around by his [[duck]], Chris has learned absolutely nothing.

===Chris's normal life is often weirder than the trolling===
Chris won't take your advice, so he will fall for trolling. Trolls do some ''bizarre'' things and Chris believes almost everything. But even if Chris had no white knights or trolls, his life would still be out of the ordinary.

The things Chris achieves when left to his own devices are sometimes even more jaw-dropping than what the trolls think up. His previous brushes with [[Jerkops|authority figures]] and his [[Attraction Sign|creepy]] [[Fridays After Five|behavior]] during his outside leisure time are good examples.

===Chris asks for it, and always recovers===
Hellbent on spreading his version of the truth because he's TRUE and HONEST, Chris cannot realize that his edit warring on Encyclopedia Dramatica was practically a squeal begging for more trolling.

[[wiktionary:TMI|TMI]] is a tactic Chris uses that backfires without fail. Since Chris insists on revealing the most minute details of his life to everyone he meets, the trolls always get more information to fuel further acts of trolling. White knights cannot stop our hero from being honest.

Chris doesn't get embarrassed either. Oh, his nudes and [[Recycling|lewd acts]] are all over the internet? No big deal! [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009|All adults do that kind of thing]], so what's the problem?

Chris managed to fully recover from the depressing [[Chris Chan Update 21 October 2008|21 October 2008 video]] mentioned above (and quite quickly, too) and proceeded to fail even harder for months. Likewise, despite professing great emotional distress, he bounced back from [[CWC is Sad|the loss of Kacey]] in [[Red Letter CWC Certified Day|a matter of hours]]. He even bounced back after being [[Mumble 9|verbally abused by a room of trolls]], one of whom went so far as to tell him to go kill himself. Whatever the trolls say or do to Chris, he always does or says something worse to someone else, and he always bounces back anyway, so what's the problem?

[[Image:Chriscash.jpg|thumb|right|180px|True, true.]]

===Chris has made himself an outcast===
High school and college are where people are given their first and often only chance to become a functioning part of society. They gave Chris an even greater chance because he's autistic. They lent him a friendly, caring hand and opened themselves to his friendship, males and females alike. And what did Chris do? He ''refused, by choice,'' to associate with anyone who wasn't female, young, white, in the Charlottesville area, and willing to mother him forever more.

When [[Mary Lee Walsh|the dean]] gave him a chance to reform his behavior, he kept going with his bullshit, threw a particularly bizarre tantrum in her office, and was rightly kicked out of [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] for a full year. What did he learn from that? He learned that Mary Lee Walsh was an evil hag with a personal vendetta against him. He was given ''several'' chances to learn that his loitering and soliciting were not appropriate behaviors in a public place, and what did he learn? He learned that mall cops are Jerkops, that [[Virginia is for Virgins]], and that his [[Love Quest]] was a matter of him against the world, with the world as the antagonist. After he was kicked out of The GAMe PLACe (where he was again given far more leeway than most people ever would have been given, due to Snyder's misguided pity for him), he was barred from his last hangout in Ruckersville that was still open to him.

Now, it's too late for Chris. He has been offered friendship and care time and again, and every time without fail, he drives his friends away with his entitlement, his perverse, bizarre, bellicose behaviors, or his inappropriate sexual advances, or, failing that, he will dismiss them for trying to get him to improve himself or behave like a responsible adult. While he has began frequenting [[Impulse Gay Social Club]] in recent months, and could potentially make friends there, many Christorians believe it is merely a matter of time before history repeats itself and Chris alienates himself from the other regulars.

Complain as he might, Chris's own actions have made him an outcast, and since he refuses to accept this, much less attempt to improve himself, an outcast he shall remain. Try as they might, neither white knights nor trolls have the power to save Chris from his delusions and cognitive dissonance, only he does.

===The stresses of white-knighting===
In order to get close to Chris, white knights have to spend at least as much time and effort as trolls to keep up-to-date on his activities. Most have to lie and pretend to be a single girl to even capture his attention. This, combined with Chris's habit of pushing away anyone who tries to connect with him, is enough to make any sane non-psychologist crash into slumber.

===Chris will not even read your message===
The spam filter is a powerful innovation of good ol' America Online. Any e-mails sent to his address will be left unread and deleted. Even back in the days of the [[Mailbag]], any emails submitted to it, if they even got published, would've been [[Mailbag 29|given one-word replies and ignored]].

===The trolling will not cease===
Even if white knights get to Chris somehow, there is no endgame in which Chris will be free from trolls before his death.

In school, Chris was trolled by his classmates. He was even trolled by one of his [[Joshua Martinez|real life friends]]. In college, he was trolled by friends who grew sick of his bullshit, and by [[Anna McLerran|girls]] [[Hannah|annoyed]] by his "attraction methods" and rampant, unabashed sexism. If Chris quit the Internet tomorrow, he would still be trolled by a society that refuses to tolerate ignorant manchildren flouting its rules.

If everyone trying to create his next fake sweetheart suddenly got bored and quit, Chris would unconsciously attract new trolls to take their place, and we all know weens are more than willing.

If Chris isn't assigned a custodian after Barbara dies, his story will probably end when he falls victim to some con artist who swindles him out of his monthly tugboat and perhaps his home. If Chris does get assigned a custodian, he will continue his antics until the custodian kicks him out or bans him from the internet. If the custodian bans Chris from the internet, that's Chris trolling himself.

If Chris ends up in prison (again) he will be trolled there as well, and that's if he's lucky.

If the entire world reforms and decides to leave Chris alone, his own sense of victimization will override any benefit. Consider that Chris felt persecuted simply by observing [[JERKS|males who had more success than himself]]. He regards legitimate assertions of authority as rank brutality. [[Adam Stackhouse]] managed to upset Chris to a degree that Christorians still find especially impressive, and he did it without even knowing that Chris existed at the time. Bleak as it is, unless Chris embarks on a program of radical self-improvement, and manages against the odds to shake off both his legions of abusers and seamy reputation, he will forever feel like a thoroughly-kicked autistic.

===The trolling helps Chris and, indeed, others===
If Chris were just some random nobody on the Internet, he'd be doing nothing but playing vidya and occasionally drawing unsellable art until Barb died. He'd remain without social skills, a job, success or future.

Instead, Chris's antics have become a cultural phenomenon that, without exaggeration, is something extraordinary, unique, and which likely won't be replicated in any shape or form for years to come. Chris has long secured his place among such luminaries as [[wikipedia:Time Cube|Gene Ray]] and [[wikipedia:John Titor|John Titor]], and unlike Gene, you can actually comprehend what Chris is saying most of the time. Chris's interactions with the world through his websites and YouTube have drawn in a considerable number of people from around the world who are participating in an unprecedented, continual piece of performance art of a kind that would have been unheard of only a few years ago. He brings entertainment to thousands of people all over Earth, an accomplishment that most could never dream of achieving--the kind of thing that would give Dane Cook a stiffy just to consider. His internet fame is actually a sort of success in its own right, and ''may'' bring him further success. There are thousands of people out there that are so fascinated by him that they study and document his life on a daily basis.

One could argue that if Chris eventually "retired" from this comedy act by actually coming to terms with his problems, seeking professional help, and completely reforming (and selling media rights to his life's story to the highest bidder, like all sensible people would do), he could live the rest of his life secure and probably moderately well-off. The audience would give him a standing ovation for entertaining them for as long as he did, and move on to the next piece of tragicomedy brought to us by the emerging Web technologies. We have seen far more messed-up celebrity stories already; Chris's tale is at least quite different from the norm and engaging.

What's more, the trolls provide him with an actual social outlet to learn and grow, even if he generally opts out of doing either. Instead of being an unemployable, fat bedroom-dweller that nobody has ever heard of, he's an internet-famous unemployable, fat bedroom dweller, and this by itself increases his chances of getting friends and a girl. He may even end up employed, too, possibly appearing in an advertisement or sponging off royalties from any biographical medium, whether it be a book, movie, or TV series. He could even [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (album)|become the next William Hung]] if he put half an ounce of effort into it.

In fact, recently, Chris seems to have latched onto the idea of monetizing his e-fame, which he has managed somewhat successfully. It started with him being paid by a Japanese noise band (albeit a really obscure one) to produce artwork for their album cover (that didn't feature Sonichu or himself for a change) in early 2015, for which he received $50. At around the same time, he started making replica [[medallions]], taking commissions, and, a little later, making custom Sonichu Amiibos, all of which sold fairly well on [[eBay]], particularly the medallions.

In [[August 2015]], Chris did what no-one had thought he would - he resumed work on the Sonichu comics, asking for donations in exchange for releasing new pages, at a price of $10 per page. He even redrew some of the old comics to be a [[Chris and anger|little more]] [[Death threats|tasteful]], for example retconning the infamous gory executions of the Asperpedia Four in the original version of [[Sonichu 10]] to banishment to an Amish community and forced marriage. Many on Kiwi Farms applauded his resumption of work on the comics, a move they had long suggested. It was predicted that the comics would be a better earner for Chris than the relatively unsuccessful botched Amiibos; although no-one could have forseen [[Autism|one person paying Chris $1000]] - which translates into 100 pages worth of new Sonichu comics - meaning Chris gets money for toys, weed and hormones, while we get new content, and the pleasure of watching the fallout <s>if</s> when Chris fails to produce that many pages. It should of course go without saying that Chris's merchandise is bought ([[Kenneth Erwin Englehardt|almost]]) exclusively by trolls, Christorians, and the rest of his "fanbase", as the fragile, low-quality crap he churns out has no value to anyone else. All in all, Chris is finally cashing in on his e-fame, which may someday lead to him "making peace" with his tormentors, and recognizing that he has a somewhat symbiotic relationship with them. Which of course, renders white knighting essentially redundant.

Another important point to remember is that Chris's perversions, flaws and constant failure have made his life into something of a cautionary tale to other autistic people, and he has inspired [[Autism#Chris and other autistics|hundreds]] of them to self-improvement. Really, no matter how dire his circumstances come to be, he's accomplishing a pretty good thing here.

===Chris treats "fans" and white knights like crap===
If you try to white knight him, his response is merely to block you on Facebook and never respond. He accuses practically all white knights of being trolls. Quite ironic, isn't it? He screams "I'M STRAIGHT!" when you tell him up front that you're a guy. When you tell him his current "girlfriend" is actually a troll, he'll accuse you of wanting to "break up the relationship for the lulz." He'll be rude, won't listen and won't read between the lines. He will always bite the hand that feeds him, so you should just let him wallow in [[You know what, I HATE ME TOO|his own self-loathing]].

{{quote|Whatever.|Chris' [[Mailbag_29#Whatever|1-word response]] to a fan leaving him, a social worker concerned about the [[Chris_and_health#Living_conditions|state of his house]], and a fan concerned about [[Chandler_Cats#Kitty|one of his cats]].}}
{{quote|You can go f*** yourself.|Chris' [[Mailbag_43#Go_Fuck_Yourself.2C_too.21|response]] to constructive criticism about [[Chris_and_copyright#Chris.27s_views|copyright]].}}

Chris doesn't treat his so-called "fans" much better. Even aside from the SonichuIzCool incident mentioned above, Chris has severe problems answering questions from his fans, and will often react in a hostile manner to everything he sees as negative or offensive. His Mailbag is the most obvious example. He hates being corrected, and tenaciously clings to his misinformed beliefs; his insistence that Asperger's Syndrome and autism are unrelated is a good example of this. When, or if, he's having a good day and manages to answer questions from fans at all, he often gives them very brief, one or two word answers that do not elaborate on anything, or outright ignore parts of the question. Not only is he terse, he's also slow to act; for example, it [[Brutal Legend Plus|took him three days to realize]] that a [[Brutal Legend|video he uploaded]] had no audio on it whatsoever. He also promised that [[Sonichu Fan Promo|a spectacular fan creation]] would be officially featured in the ''Sonichu'' comic, and it ultimately was, ''over a year later''.

Most webcomics have a specific schedule that they have decided to follow. Many webcomics fail to live up to them, some less, some more, some for good reasons, some have no excuse whatsoever. Chris didn't have a set schedule for the comic for the longest time, but then agreed to update the comic on a daily basis, a schedule which even the most well-funded webcomic artists would consider particularly demanding. In February and March 2010, there have been few updates to the comic. When the inevitable complaints about schedule slip started to come, Chris snapped at his fans by saying that inspiration takes its time, forgetting that it was ''he'' who decided daily updates were the way to go. As the "Great Director Chandler", he could have the power to decide what schedule to follow, but instead, he chose to attack his fans.

===Chris's upbringing doesn't justify his actions===
The shitty way [[Borb]] raised him may be an ''explanation'' for why Chris is so fucked up, but it's not an ''excuse''. Plenty of people have bad childhoods, and abusive or incompetent parents. However, these people don't use that as an excuse for whatever bad things they do. As these people get help and move on, Chris, on the other hand, remains dependent on the same people who screwed him up, and doesn't even try to move past his childhood. Instead, he escapes into a world of fantasy and pornography, and when confronted by reality, he will use all the mental gymnastics at his disposal to twist reality to resemble how he wants it to be. There's also the fact that [[Cole Smithey]] grew up in the same household with the same parents, and yet he lives a relatively normal life. Meanwhile, Chris behaves like an overgrown child, draws art on par with that of elementary schoolers, is chronically in trouble with the law for his persistent failure to regulate his own behavior in public, and generally is extremely antisocial.

===Chris's life would still be a disaster even if the trolls never bothered him===
Today, Chris is a total human trainwreck, slowly losing the last of his sanity as each day goes by. While the systematic trolling of him throughout the last few years has doubtless contributed to his degrading mental state (especially his extreme paranoia and distrust for almost everyone), the fact still remains that his life's horrible state is mainly caused by factors outside of the internet. He would still be a lonely outcast, as his poor upbringing gave him such warped views of the world and led him to engage in such bizarre behavior that he drove away every person he tried to connect with. He would still be living in unsanitary conditions due to Barb's hoarding and the fact that his house has not been properly cleaned in the better part of a decade. He would still be banned from most of his favorite hangouts due to his loitering and hostile behavior to other patrons. Also, at the core of it all is how Chris decided that he would be better off living off government handouts while he sits around playing with toys and video games instead of getting a job and heading down a career path, which would have been his one-way ticket to escaping the cesspool that is [[14 Branchland Court]] and living a fulfilling life, not unlike that of his half-brother. Instead, he decided to remain dependent on his elderly, emotionally disturbed parents; look how well that's working out for him.

True to his word, Chris all but abandoned the Internet between [[July 2012]] and [[2013]], save for sporadic ramblings on Facebook. Despite this, quite a bit was revealed about how well he was doing independent of troll influence. He [[Other_documents#Epistle_to_the_Wesley_Memorial_United_Methodist_Church|alienated himself from his church]], earning a ban from the new pastor (undoubtedly because Chris wouldn't shut the hell up about the trolls). After being banned, he even dismissed Rocky as an effective counselor (keep in mind that Rocky once bailed him out of jail, which is quite an extraordinary act of kindness, counselor or not), and went so far as to accuse [[Chris and religion|God]] of being a troll. He continues to this day to describe his life as isolated and lonely, with nobody willing to talk to him, a scenario many have tried and failed to warn him about. He even earned some ire from Anna, his biggest white knight for [[Facebook#Gay_Marriage|making anti-homosexual statements]] on his Facebook page, he even chose to argue with her instead of trying to piece together why a lesbian friend of his would find such statements offensive. As a coup de grace on all of this, Chris ended up trolling himself in the grandest fashion by revealing an [[Facebook#Imgur|Imgur account]] made of all of his previously hidden Facebook posts, despite trolls (save for the one who started it) being completely in the dark about it.

Even if all of that doesn't convince you for some reason, consider this: Chris came ''this'' close to being thrown in jail on [[28 October 2011]], and it's possible he'll end up there at last with the more recent [[26 December 2014]] incident, both of which involved the assault of innocent retail workers trying to protect their customers from him. Both times, he did this on his own initiative, with no prodding from the trolls. And make no mistake, ''everyone'' was thoroughly disgusted by Chris's actions, none were eager to defend his pepper-spray assault on an innocent employee, even those who helped support his [[Sonic Boom Protests]] before.

If we were to be extraordinarily generous and assume that none of the disasters which have befallen Chris since the trolling efforts began in earnest would otherwise have happened, the facts ''still'' indicate that Chris's life would have been a complete mess. Chris was discovered by the internet at large in late 2007, by which point he had already been suspended from college, and banned from the [[Fashion Square]] (twice), along with his local branches of [[Wal-Mart]] and [[Target]], only avoiding criminal charges for the ruckus he caused at the latter because the state didn't feel it was worth the effort to pursue the case. As recently as two months before the "official" start of the trolling of Chris, he was making death threats against Adam Stackhouse and his preteen sister, for the former's unwitting disruption of Chris's plan to lose his virginity with Megan, something that she had made clear she had no interest in doing. It may be a depressing conclusion to arrive at, but there's never been anything that anyone outside of the confines of 14 Branchland Court could have reasonably done to prevent Chris's life from being a trainwreck.

===Chris's white knights are making him worse===
A quick glance at the comments on his Facebook statuses should confirm this. Even after he ''committed a felony'' by assaulting a GameStop employee with pepper spray on Boxing Day 2014, then posted a long-winded, obviously dishonest tirade painting himself as an innocent victim on Facebook, none of his white knights offered anything more than a softly-worded, mild condemnation of his behavior. [[William Elliott Waterman|Some]] avoided a direct response altogether, and made some barely relevant comment that conspicuously avoided the main point of Chris's self-serving drivel, probably a feeble and misguided attempt to defuse his [[Chris and anger|rage]].

And this is how his white knights react whenever he gets angry about having to face the consequences of his own behavior. It's painfully clear to Chris's trolls and other observers that his white knights are woefully ill-equipped to deal with Chris. The reactions his tantrums garner from them clearly indicate that they remain ignorant (passively or otherwise) to facts that most learned long ago; namely, that the "soft touch" has never worked with Chris, and only serves to reinforce his [[Chris and reality|belief]] that [[Chris and his Ego|he should be given whatever he desires]] (he is even openly stating that he is ''entitled'' to a girlfriend), and allowed to do as he pleases, while [[Barbara Chandler|others]] shield him from the [[Chris and the Law|negative repercussions]].

Chris's white knights also habitually feed Chris's belief that his trolls are subhuman bullies who simply want to see him destroyed in every conceivable way because he's such a special, brave little boy. While this is [[A-Logging|true of]] [[Weening|some]], for the most part, Chris's trolls are just as interested in seeing Chris improve himself as white knights are, if not moreso, even if many are beginning to doubt such a thing is possible. Indeed, many of the female troll personas who "date" or "befriend" Chris have tried to help him see the error of his ways and reform, and continue to do so. It is partially due to the influence of Chris's white knights, who foolishly (and often futilely) try to root out these trolls, that these attempts to help Chris never result in lasting, positive change on his part.

In short, most of Chris's white knights are attention whores, sycophants or both. To these people, going on a witch-hunt for trolls is preferable to actually trying to help Chris, something which, ironically, even Chris's trolls continue to try to do.

==Examples==
:''Read: [[White knight emails]]''

===White Knights on YouTube===

Among the most notable of Chris's white knights was a [[YouTube]] counter-troll who claimed to be a 21 year-old Russian model named Svenka. Via her YouTube account, [http://www.youtube.com/user/hottiee96 hottiee96], she released an inordinate number of screencaps from troll conversations on [[Sonichu IRC]], including private conversations between Chris and Panda. She also released an image of the [[Man in the Pickle Suit]] who would later steal Chris's first date, [[Emily]]. Were Chris less thick-skulled and even slightly willing to accept irrefutable evidence, Svenka may have made somewhat of a negative impact on the organized trolling effort against Chris, but ultimately she was ineffectual. Svenka also had a unhealthy obsession with the [[CWCville Library]]'s original curator, Arjen Van Dierten.

On 6 [[May 2009]], YouTube user xThexPinchx/NorthxStar7/[http://www.youtube.com/user/ThePinchisDaBomb ThePinchisDaBomb] tried to blackmail major trolls, claiming to have information on them. He was easily called on his bluff by someone who had not trolled Chris at all.<ref>[http://www.youtube.com/user/softerthanhardware YouTube]</ref> The Pinch has also threatened [[BlueSpike]] saying he has information from his friends, forgetting the fact that BlueSpike ''has no friends''.

===White Knights on Facebook===

In recent times (since 2012), Chris has taken to using Facebook as his main means of expressing himself. Inevitably, this has not only attracted the attention of trolls, but, in 2013, a slew of White Knights as well, in particular, a [[William Elliott Waterman]], who taunted the trolls to come after him instead of Chris ('''Spoiler:''' Nobody did, because nobody actually cared what he had to say). Anna and [[Kim]] are two of the most notable ones on his friends list, both of whom try to offer constructive advice whenever Chris nosedives into a rant...when they're not busy kissing his ass, especially in the case of Anna.

However, as we've come to expect of Chris, anybody who tells him something he doesn't want to hear are people that needed to be brushed off until they stop saying those mean, awful things to him. A good case in point is his [[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Chris_Expresses_His_Outrage_for_Walmart|anger-laced tirade in September 2013, when he got thrown out of Walmart and started calling names]]. The white knights typically chimed in with their support...''until'' he revealed that he [[Chris and the law|vandalized]] an Xbox One display in the store. Several of them then told Chris that this was not right of him to do, and that the manager had every right to throw him out. His response to that?

{{quote|They do not.
And if they do, they are most in the wrong, [[Chris and reality|because they are most abusive and overzealous of their "authoritative power" that never has existed ever]].|- Chris's response to Chris Rhodes}}

===White Knights in Real Life===

Aside from the most obvious example, an old classmate of Chris from [[Manchester High School]] came online and attempted to defend Chris. Once [[SheCameForCWC.jpg|certain details]] became known, however, said classmate quickly backpedaled on this once he realized that the majority of [[CWCki|what happened]] was Chris' own fault.

===TV Tropes===
The TV Tropes [http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Webcomic/Sonichu article on ''Sonichu''] used to have a white knight message as the first text of the article, with a link back to this very page. It was eventually removed due to TV Tropes' website policy changing later on--in other words, said message would no longer be allowed on the website. The message is reproduced below:

{{quote|Hey Chris! If you're reading this: you seriously need to get help from licensed professionals, before the stuff you do gets you thrown in prison or forcibly committed. And we're sorry, but you have no real fans - the people you think are your fans are really either trolls or laughing at you behind your back. Every. Last. One. Please listen to us - for once.|- Concerned tropers}}

Unfortunately, the editor in question fails to realize that their message, while well intentioned, will do absolutely nothing and Chris will simply ignore it even if he does [[Mailbag 52|fully read and input it for better development. Thank you for your time.]]

==Conclusion==
As good as your intentions may be, there is no conceivable way any old e-friend can reach Chris at this point and change him for the better, certainly not by continuing to ass-pat and pamper him, which is precisely what fucked him up so badly in the first place (as this wiki evidences copiously). Your efforts will unfortunately fail, and he will just brush you aside, seeing no difference between you and the trolls, for daring to tell him anything he does not want to hear. With each new incident he causes, it is increasingly obvious that little short of [[Chris and psychology|professional intervention]], the [[Chris and religion|intercession of]] [[GodJesus]], or a [[Destruction Of Chris's House|horrifyingly close brush with death]] will change him.

Though the trolls have certainly tried to be a positive influence on Chris, even they are now largely admitting that Chris is well beyond our aid. They have spent years trying to pierce Chris's many insulating layers of self-deceit, egotism and sheer stubbornness. It is worth bearing in mind that it is these people, not the white knights, that are the closest thing he has to friends, and that some of them have been at this for nearly a decade. They ''know'' him, and if they can't make Chris change, what on earth makes you think you can?

To conclude, with Chris's paranoia, detachment from reality, outlandish behavior and bellicosity all becoming steadily more severe, and with interventions by trolls and white knights alike failing, the best we can hope for is that Chris causes [[26 December 2014|some sort of trouble]] that leads to him receiving the help he needs.

==See also==
*[[A-Logging]]
*[[Weening]]
*[[White knight E-mails]]

==References==
<references />

==External links==
* [http://encyclopediadramatica.se/White_knight White Knighting] article at [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]].

[[Category:People]]
[[Category:Trolling]]

Template:Da update

2016-11-26T20:25:34Z

Caldymugs:

<center>[[Image:News.jpg]]</center>
*26 November [[barb|barb]] slips up but her fall is softened by the [[14 Branchland Court|hoard]] and is not hurt
*25 November - Chris whines [[November 2016 Facebook posts#You jerks|on Facebook]] about his "creating groove" being lost because [[Chris and money#Lulu|Lulu banned him for selling fan-fiction]], an event which happened nearly a year ago.
*24 November - Chris wishes his audience a [[November 2016 Facebook posts#Happy Thanksgiving! Brought to you by Cutco|Happy Thanksgiving]]. He does some free advertizing for [[Cutco]] and Taze tea and shares photos of the Chandler family's meal. He then does a Let's Play video, [[CWC vs Koas]], as a promotion for [[Chris and money#Skylanders custom merchandise|his latest money-making scheme]].
*21 November - Chris [[Help, please|begs for money]] again on YouTube and Twitter, saying "The Mortgage people are [[Kick the Autistic|kicking us]] again." This appears right below his pinned tweet begging for [[List of toys#Skylanders|Skylanders]] toys.
*20 November - Chris, in [[Twitter#I have given my issues and feelings of Trump some thought. They are justified...|a 22-tweet long rant]], makes several childish insults against [[Pmurt]], and says he had "given my issues and feelings of Trump some thought. They are justified." He ends his rant by complaining about Twitter's 140-character limit..

<noinclude>{{clear}}{{Usage|1= This template sits in a place of pride on the CWCki [[Main Page]]. It is a list of recent Chris-related activity, namely new content. To prevent the list becoming too long, older entries should be removed as newer ones are added - with no more than 7 entries being displayed. To add new update to the list, simply edit this template and place a brief description of what happened at the top of bulleted list. Entries should also be documented on the [[{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}} {{CURRENTYEAR}}|current month article]].}}[[Category:Front page templates]]</noinclude>

2008-2013 Sales Listings

2016-11-21T21:49:49Z

Caldymugs:

{{Needs Updating}}
[[Image:Meat.jpg|thumb|[[Regina|Somebody]] gave him 30 dollars for this. No, we don't understand either.]]

[[Chris]] has a long, if not terribly successful, career '''selling things on [[eBay]]'''. This list attempts to catalog as many of his sales as possible, based on data hacked out of his e-mail accounts by [[Clyde Cash]] and others.

Most of what Chris sold is the sort of thing you would expect him to sell: old toys, old games, old electronics, [[Transformers]] crap and so forth. He also auctioned off a few antiques and knick-knacks, suggesting that his parents had him hock some of the junk cluttering up their house. (Alternatively, Chris might have nicked a couple of items off the top of his folks' enormous piles of garbage and tried to make money off them on his own.)

Chris employs a dogged selling strategy, relisting his items over and over and over, sometimes for as long as several months, regardless of whether they show any signs of selling at the listed price. While some of his items eventually sold this way for fairly decent money, others never did (like the George Bush bobblehead he tried and failed to sell for almost five months) and Chris racked up an impressive tab for listing fees in the process.

It seems as if Chris's items began to sell with greater frequency towards the end of 2008, but it's entirely possible that this is evidence of [[trolls]] at work sabotaging his auctions.

Unsurprisingly, Chris is known to exaggerate the quality of his auctions (or to leave out important information unless prompted). A number of Chris's video game and "track pack" auctions were sold in eBay auctions... and Chris conveniently forgot to mention that the codes accompanying each disc were used and therefore useless (rendering the game far less valuable). More of Chris's classic "cleverness" at work.

Interestingly, Chris listed four [[HEXBox|Xbox]] games for sale on eBay, suggesting that his hatred for da HEX-Box came later.

On June 1st of 2014, Chris advertised on [[Facebook]] that he was auctioning off an [[Original Sonichu and Rosechu Drawing|original piece]] of artwork for the first time ever. He was cautious however, and edited the upload of the art on the eBay page, explaining that it was to prevent forgery.

Chris managed to raise [[Chris and money|over $1,100]] via his eBay sales.

==Chris's eBay sales==
{| class="wikitable sortable"
|-
!align="left"|Item
!align="left"|Date Listed
!align="right"|Weeks Listed
!align="right"|Sold?
|-
|1:24 scale RARE [[Wikipedia:Ford_Mustang_(first_generation)#1964.E2.80.931966|'66 Mustang]] SHELBYGT350 BLKGOLD MUS.MAC.
|28 July 2008
|4
|No
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Chevrolet_Camaro_(first_generation)#1968|1968 Chevrolet Camaro]] SS 1/24 PRO RODZ MAISTO RODZ4LIFE
|28 July 2008
|4
|No
|-
|[[Wikipedia:21 (film)|''21'']] ([[2008]], Blu-ray Disc)
|26 December 2008
|2
|No
|-
|[[Wikipedia:88 Minutes|''88 Minutes'']] ([[2008]], Blu-ray Disc)
|26 December 2008
|2
|No
|-
|[[Wikipedia:AC/DC|AC/DC]] Live: ''[[Rock Band]]'' track pack ([[PlayStation 3]])
|3 December 2008
|2
|$39.99
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:AC/DC|AC/DC]] - No Bull'': Director's Cut DVD
|3 December 2008
|3
|$14.99
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Dungeons & Dragons|Dungeons & Dragons]] [[Wikipedia:Gateway to the Savage Frontier|''Gateway to the Savage Frontier'']]
|2 August 2008
|3
|$39.99
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Dungeons & Dragons|Dungeons & Dragons]] [[Wikipedia:Secret of the Silver Blades|''Secret of the Silver Blades'']]
|2 August 2008
|4
|No
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Dungeons & Dragons|Dungeons & Dragons]] [[Wikipedia:Champions of Krynn|''Champions of Krynn'']]
|2 August 2008
|4
|No
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Dungeons & Dragons|Dungeons & Dragons]] [[Wikipedia:Curse of the Azure Bonds|''Curse of the Azure Bonds'']]
|2 August 2008
|4
|No
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Dungeons & Dragons|Dungeons & Dragons]] [[Wikipedia:Death Knights of Krynn|''Death Knights of Krynn'']]
|2 August 2008
|4
|No
|-
|Blue B/W [[Wikipedia:VideoNow|VideoNow]] Player with [[Wikipedia:The Fairly OddParents|''The Fairly OddParents'']] [[Wikipedia:PVD Disc|PVD]]
|28 May 2008
|13
|No
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Call of Duty 2: Big Red One|''Call of Duty 2: Big Red One'']] ([[Xbox]])
|28 July 2008
|4
|No
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Cinderella (1994 film)|Cinderella]]'' ([[1995]], VHS)
|15 July 2008
|6
|No
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:The Chronicles of Riddick: Escape from Butcher Bay|The Chronicles of Riddick: Escape from Butcher Bay]]'' ([[Xbox]])
|28 July 2008
|4
|No
|-
|[[A Public Announcement for Congress|Commander-in-Chief]] [[George Bush]] [[Wikipedia:Bobblehead|Bobblehead]]
|23 April 2008
|19
|No
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Commodore 64|Commodore 64]], new in box
|23 April 2008
|1
|$39.99
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Diddy Kong Racing|''Diddy Kong Racing'']] ([[Nintendo 64]])
|2 August 2008
|8
|$9.99
|-
|Disney [[Wikipedia:Brother Bear|''Brother Bear'']] Koda 7" [[Toys|plush]]
|14 April 2008
|5
|$9.99
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Driv3r|''Driv3r'']] ([[Xbox]])
|28 July 2008
|4
|No
|-
|[[Best Buy|Dynex]] glossy 4"x6" photo paper
|5 May 2008
|14
|No
|-
|[[Best Buy|Dynex]] [[Chris and camerawork|Mini Tripod]]
|5 May 2008
|1
|No
|-
|Fully functional [[Wikipedia:Cybiko#Cybiko_Xtreme|Cybiko Xtreme]] PDA
|14 June 2008
|3
|$14.99
|-
|Fully functional [[Wikipedia:Cybiko#Cybiko_Xtreme|Cybiko Xtreme]] PDA
|8 July 2008
|8
|No
|-
|[[Obesity|Garfield]] "Boat Joke" Glass Mug [[McDonald's]]
|15 July 2008
|6
|No
|-
|Genuine Diamond Quartz [[Barb|Lady]]'s Black Leather Wrist Watch
|25 April 2008
|11
|$24.99
|-
|[[Toys|G.I. Joe]] [[George W. Bush|Colin Powell]] [[1998]] Classic Collection MIB
|23 April 2008
|11
|$39.99
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Grand Theft Auto III|''Grand Theft Auto III''']] ([[PlayStation 2]])
|28 July 2008
|4
|No
|-
|Grass Gator EXTRA Heavy Duty Replacement Head No.4650
|28 May 2008
|1
|$14.99
|-
|''[[Guitar Hero]]'' (game only) ([[PlayStation 2]])
|8 August 2008
|3
|No
|-
|''[[Guitar Hero]]'' collectible harmonica, mint in box
|12 July 2008
|8
|$9.99
|-
|''[[Harry Potter]] and the Sorcerer's Stone'' ([[PlayStation]])
|2 April 2008
|3
|No
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Hayes Microcomputer Products|Hayes]] 1200B Smartmodem 1200B Modem
|23 June 2008
|16
|$59.99
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Hot Wheels|Hot Wheels]] Tunerz 1:24 FORD SVT Lightning Concept
|28 July 2008
|4
|No
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Jada Toys|Jada]] 1/24 import racer [[Wikipedia:Nissan 240SX|Nissan 240SX]] Candy red
|28 July 2008
|4
|No
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Jada Toys|Jada]] Dub City [[2002]] [[Wikipedia:Cadillac_Escalade#Escalade_EXT|Cadillac Escalade EXT]]
|28 July 2008
|4
|No
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Lair (video game)Lair]]'' (PlayStation 3)
|12 January 2009
|2
|No
|-
|Leapfrog Leapster Pink without AC
|2 August 2008
|2
|$29.99
|-
|Maisto G Ridez 1:24 [[Wikipedia:Volkswagen Beetle|Volkswagen Beetle]] die-cast car
|28 July 2008
|5
|No
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Marvel Super Hero Squad|Marvel Super Hero Squad]]'' [[Wikipedia:Galactus|Galactus]] (loose)
|14 April 2008
|19
|No
|-
|[[Aqua Teen Hunger Force|Meatwad's Shredwad]] ''[[Rock Band]]'' [[Guitar]] for [[PS3]]
|15 September 2009
|1
|$29.99
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Men in Black (film)|''Men In Black'']] (2008, Blu-ray Disc)
|26 December 2008
|2
|No
|-
|MiJam Flower MP3 Ornament Accessory
|28 May 2008
|12
|No
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Mortal Kombat Mythologies: Sub-Zero|''Mortal Kombat Mythologies: Sub-Zero'']] ([[Nintendo 64]])
|15 July 2008
|6
|$9.99
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Celebrity Deathmatch (video game)|Celebrity Deathmatch]]'' ([[Xbox]])
|28 July 2008
|4
|No
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Oops!... I Did It Again|Oops!... I Did It Again]]'' - [[Britney Spears]] (CD [[2000]])
| 30 April 2008
|12
|$9.99
|-
|Perfectly working [[PSOne]] with ''[[Harry Potter]]'' game
|25 April 2008
|10
|$24.99
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Philips|Philips]] [[PSP]]-1000 Micro FM Transmitter
|13 May 2008
|5
|$14.99
|-
|[[PlayStation One]] [[Wikipedia:DualShock|DualShock]] Analog Controler
|18 July 2008
|2
|$14.99
|-
|[[PlayStation One]] [[Wikipedia:DualShock|DualShock]] Analog Controler'''
|2 August 2008
|1
|$14.99
|-
|[[PlayStation One]] [[Wikipedia:DualShock|DualShock]] Analog Controler
|7 August 2008
|1
|$14.99
|-
|Playtronix Chip the Talking Golf Bag Batteries Included
|2 August 2008
|3
|$19.99
|-
|Plush Winter [[Wikipedia:Eeyore|Eeyore]] Disney Store doll
|14 April 2008
|11
|$9.99
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Pokémon Snap|Pokémon Snap]] ([[Nintendo 64]])
|2 August 2008
|9
|$9.99
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Pokémon Stadium|Pokémon Stadium]] ([[Nintendo 64]])
|2 August 2008
|8
|$9.99
|-
|[[High school|Prom Night]] (2008, Blu-ray Disc)
|26 December 2008
|2
|No
|-
|[[Transformers|Prowl Vs. Lockdown]] Combo Pack
|7 April 2009
|1
|No
|-
|[[PS3]] ''[[Guitar Hero]] 3'' [[Wikipedia:Gibson Guitar Corporation|Gibson]] [[Guitar]]
|15 September 2009
|1
|$61.00
|-
|[[PSOne]] AC adaptor
|15 July 2008
|7
|No
|-
|[[Wikipedia:National Geographic Wild|''Relentless Enemies'']] ([[2007]], Blu-ray Disc)
|7 June 2008
|7
|$19.99
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Seagate Technology|Seagate]] ST96812AS-RK 60 GB SATA hard drive
|4 November 2008
|7
|$39.99
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Sonic X|Sonic X]]'' [[Punchy|Knuckles]] 9" action figure
|14 April 2008
|7
|$9.99
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Sonic X|Sonic X]]'' [[Homos|Tails]] 9" figure
|14 April 2008
|14
|$9.99
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Sony|Sony]] HDTV remote RM-AAP021
|16 December 2008
|1
|$24.99
|-
|[[Sony PlayStation]] - Game console - light gray
|4 November 2008
|1
|No
|-
|[[Sony PlayStation]] bundle with [[Wikipedia:Gran Turismo 2|''Gran Turismo 2'']] and [[Wikipedia:Mortal Kombat Mythologies: Sub-Zero|''Mortal Kombat Mythologies: Sub-Zero'']]
|18 July 2008
|6
|No
|-
|[[Sony PlayStation]] bundle with [[Wikipedia:Gran Turismo 2|''Gran Turismo 2'']], [[Wikipedia:Mortal Kombat Mythologies: Sub-Zero|''Mortal Kombat Mythologies: Sub-Zero'']] and ''WWF''
|11 November 2008
|5
|$45.99
|-
|[[Sony PlayStation]] with ''[[Wikipedia:Frogger 3D|Frogger 3D]]''
|19 July 2008
|3
|No
|-
|[[Sony PlayStation]] with ''Mobil1 Rally'' and ''Champ Motocross''
|10 August 2008
|4
|$45.99
|-
|[[PSP of Fail|Sony PSP]] - Handheld game system - piano black
|3 May 2009
|1
|No
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Sony|Sony]] RM-YD010 remote control
|16 December 2008
|1
|$19.99
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Street Fighter IV|Street Fighter IV]]'' [[Wikipedia:Ryu (Street Fighter)|Ryu]] C.E. [[PS3]] figurine *RARE*
|5 March 2009
|1
|$17.50
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Street Fighter IV|Street Fighter IV]]'' [[Wikipedia:Ryu (Street Fighter)|Ryu]] C.E. [[PS3]] figurine *RARE*
|7 April 2009
|1
|$19.99
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Super Mario 64|''Super Mario 64'']] ([[Nintendo 64]])
|15 July 2008
|1
|$15.50
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Texas Instruments|Texas Instruments]] TI-99/4A home computer NIB
|23 April 2008
|3
|$49.99
|-
|''[[Transformers]]'' ([[2007]], DVD)
|1 May 2008
|12
|$14.99
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Transformers (film)|''Transformers'']] with Final Battle [[Wikipedia:Jazz (Transformers)|Jazz]] [[Wikipedia:Pontiac Solstice|Pontiac Solstice]]
|2 April 2008
|4
|No
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Transformers Animated|Transformers Animated]]'' [[Wikipedia:Optimus Prime|Optimus Prime]] vs. [[Wikipedia:Megatron|Megatron]] figures
|23 June 2008
|4
|$19.99
|-
|[[Transformers]] [[Wikipedia:Cybertron|Cybertron]]/''[[Wikipedia:Transformers: Cybertron|Transformers: Cybertron]]'' [[Wikipedia:Starscream|Starscream]] (loose)
|14 April 2008
|1
|$39.99
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Transformers: Energon|''Transformers: Energon'']] [[Wikipedia:Megatron|Megatron]]
|14 April 2008
|18
|$24.99
|-
|''[[Wikipedia:Vantage Point (film)|Vantage Point]]'' ([[2008]], Blu-ray Disc)
|26 December 2008
|2
|No
|-
|Vintage [[Nintendo|NES]] [[Wikipedia:Gamepad#Nintendo_Entertainment_System.2FFamily_Computer|joypad]]
|14 April 2008
|6
|$19.99
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Wedgwood|Wedgwood]] [[Wikipedia:Pennines|Pennine]] brown plate, rare and retro
|15 July 2008
|6
|No
|-
|[[Wikipedia:Western Digital|Western Digital]] Scorpio™ WD1200BEVS 120 GB SATA Hard Disk Drive
|4 November 2008
|7
|$79.99
|-
|Willitts [[1987]] Carousel Memories HTF Two Horse Plate
|14 April 2008
|8
|No
|-
|kre-o micro changers Series 1, 12 piece set complete
|18 September 2013
|1
|No
|-
|Antonio Stradiuarius Copy Faciebat Anno 1721 Violin/Fiddle With Case And Bow
|28 May 2014
|1
|Not yet
|-
|Monogram B-17G Flying Fortress And P-51B Mustang
|May 2014
|3
|$17.99
|-
|[[Original Sonichu and Rosechu Drawing|Original Sonichu and Rosechu Drawing]], signed
|1 June 2014
|1
|$200
|-
|colspan="3"|Total
|$1,115.59
|}

==See also==
*[[eBay]]

{{Lists}}
[[Category:Lists]]
[[Category:EBay]]

Pmurt

2016-11-09T14:14:12Z

Caldymugs:

{{quote|Plus, Trump is just too damn rich And [[Chris|immature]]. And "Trump" spelled backwards is "Pmurt", which rhymes with "Hurt", and he would badly "Pmurt" this country in office.|[[Chris]]}}
[[Image:Trump.jpg|thumb|Pmurt.]]
'''Pmurt''' is a [[CWC-ism]] for 2016 Republican Presidential Elect [[wikipedia:Donald Trump|Donald Trump]]. He pronounces it '''Murt''', based on his belief that the P is silent when the name is said backwards<ref>[[Something Completely Different - A few Transformers Jokes, also anti-Pmurt]]</ref>.

This CWC-ism comes from a [[September 2016 Facebook posts#Registered to vote|Facebook comment from 25 September]] (partially quoted above), in which Chris says that "Trump spelled backwards is "Pmurt", [[Random Access Humor|which rhymes with hurt, and that Trump would badly "Pmurt" the US if elected.]]".

Reversing Trump’s name has twofold meanings. Firstly, names are particularly sacred to Chris<ref>[[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!]]</ref><ref>[[To Clyde Gregg]]</ref><ref>[[Exposing Jeff]]</ref>; in his eyes, mocking anyone's name will severely degrade them — this article will establish that Chris has enormous distain for Donald Trump. Secondly, Chris has historically assumed that saying anything backwards induces subliminal stimuli<ref>[[U8C43P2A37A8 y U8C1N023V0L]]</ref> — which he believe are enormously influential on the psyche ''and'' the physical body<ref>[[Subliminal Frequency Hypnosis]]</ref>. Therefore, Chris may believe reversing Trump's name, in a negative context, might effectively alter his audience's perception of him. Beyond the random-access humor, Chris probably thinks his rendition of Trump’s name is a serious presidential objection for everyone to consider.

Chris continued using this backwards name in subsequent Facebook posts and videos.

He is opposed to Pmurt becoming President for the following reasons:

*He is an "[[Chris|immature brat]] who mocks everyone."
*He "Wants [[Chris and race|the immigrants to build their own "Keep Out" wall so [he] would kick them all out]]."
*He "hates our kind." [LGBTQ]
*He "was a [[Autism|one-track tape]], [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|repeating himself]] [[Honor Roll|on pat deeds]] [[CADD|that he was "proud"(?)]] of."
*He has "ideals of [[Chris and money|cutting finances]] from all of the more important resources the country needs in communities and feeding the industries from the National Debt. And he acted against the immigrants in that topic as well; they have to work too, you know."

Another possible reason he is against Pmurt is that a [[Women's Rights|a female is running for president.]] Knowing Chris' history, he would much rather have a female leading his country than a male.

Chris has also [[Honor Roll|cited an episode of The Simpsons]] as one of his major sources for being anti-Pmurt<ref>[[September 2016 Facebook posts#Registered to vote]]</ref>.

His hatred of Pmurt is so great that he made three videos of himself role-playing acts of violence on Pmurt with ''[[Transformers]]'' and ''[[My Little Pony]]'' toys.<ref>[[September 2016 Paid Video Requests#Paid Message to the Trolls]]</ref><ref>[[Something Completely Different - A few Transformers Jokes, also anti-Pmurt]]</ref> Including one were he destroyed a transformers toy further showing his lack of [[chris and money|financial]] [[Financhu Crisis|sense]]

Interestingly, both Pmurt and Chris [[Megan|have been accused of sexual harassment]].

==See Also==
* [[Chris and English]]

==Sources==
<references/>

[[Category:CWC-isms]]
[[Category:Things Chris hates]]
[[Category:Stubs]]

CWCki

2016-11-08T20:36:20Z

Caldymugs: Reverted mistake I made

{{Articleofthenow}}
''This is the article for the wiki ''about'' Chris. For more information about the wiki written ''by'' Chris, please see [[CWCipedia]]''.

[[Image:TypicalCWCkiPage.png|200px|thumb|What happens when CWCki gets [[Stress|STRESSED]].]]
[[Image:Cwcki2009.JPG|200px|thumb|Popularity of the CWCki throughout the years.]]

The '''CWCki''' (pronounced "quick-ee") was created by [[Cogsdev]], as the [[ED]] page was getting far too large for people to take. It serves as the Internet's only wiki devoted to [[Christian Weston Chandler]], the infamous [[autistic]] manchild. As with any wiki, anyone can edit it, even YOU. Seriously though, if you're reading this, you are qualified and should be editing (Just read [[Help:A Quick Guide to CWCki|this]] first).
As stated in its motto, '''NO SHIT IS TOO MINOR'''.

==History==
[[Image:CWCkicopter.JPG|thumb|right|One of the many members of the CWCki team, on the hunt for more information regarding autistic manchildren.]]

The CWCki came to life on 110mb, the land of shitty web servers that go down every damn day.
Before the CWCki moved to sonichu.com, it had a history of outages caused by shit servers and counter-trolls. This is a history of the CWCki:
* [[October 2008]]: 110mb shut down all its service for two entire weeks out of nowhere just to move to a different data center.
* 25 [[January 2009]]: The CWCki's MediaWiki incarnation is founded.
* [[White knight|Someone]] complained to 110mb in [[August 2009]] and everything got shut down. Then a day or two later, it was back up again.
* Due to maintenance, 110mb was closed from 13 September to 18 [[September 2009]].
* 4 [[January 2010]]: Finally, after the 9001st outage, the CWCki moved to Cogsdev.org.
* 26 [[June 2010]]: cogsdev.110mb.com is terminated from the server it was on.
* 7 [[November 2010]]: The CWCki moves from Cogsdev.org to Sonichu.com having obtained the domain name.
* 1 [[March 2016]]: [http://blog.areyouahuman.com/goodbye_playthru| Captcha Service] for the CWCki shuts down.
{{-}}
==Forum==

{{main|CWCki Forums}}

The '''[http://cwckiforums.com CWCki Forums]''' is frequented by many of the wiki regulars and other people interested of all things Christorical.

Previously hosted on Yuku, the forum was hosted on Forumer until 8 November 2012 when it was deleted off Forumer's servers. It had several relief forums until it had a permanent forum.

==Chris's opinion==
{{quote|With that, I respectfully ask the webmaster of the Unapproved and Detested CWCki to remove ALL PAGES Classified under their "[[Template:People|Christian Weston Chandler's Web Of Life]]" and "[[Template:Sweethearts|Sweethearts, heartsweets and gal-pals]]" Categories. I give him until Midnight of Friday March 12, 2010, Eastern Standard Time, for the Webmaster of that CWCki to Remove ALL OF THOSE PAGES, [[Chris and his Ego|or there will be trouble upon that Person directly from Me]].|[[Chris]], after discovering the CWCki, 02:03, 11 [[March 2010]] (CET).}}

The CWCki, like everything else on the [[Internet]] that criticizes him or depicts him unfavorably, is something that Chris hates. In the quote above Chris displays large amounts of his [[ego]] and as usual issues a [[death threat]]. Unfortunately for Chris, his demands did not go through. There are two reasons for this. First, his [[Clyde Cash|past track record with serious threats]] suggests that he [[stress|lacks the energy]] to put his ideas into action. Secondly, CWCkians are well aware of the solid legal standing of the website and will not cave to idle threats from autistic manchildren.

In the wee hours of 14 March 2010, Chris updated his blog, taking credit for the alteration of [[The Wallflower]]'s page and demanding that the rest of the pages mentioned earlier follow suit on or before 31 March or there would be trouble. [[Pocket knife|He IS armed]]. However, in true Chris fashion, midnight of 31 March passed with Chris doing absolutely jack shit. As if anyone was surprised.

On 2 April 2010, he tried to fulfill his threat, by making [[List of Christian's edits to the CWCki|3 minor edits]] under the name of [[User:GodofThunderGodofWar|GodofThunderGodofWar]], obviously forgetting that CWCki editors are not ''entirely'' unaware of Chris's recent favorites in video game field. His edits were reverted immediately and his user and user talk pages were bombarded with negative comments. The edits so far were mostly done to glorify him, and are not exactly the kind of hard-hitting bombastic protest CWCkians were expecting based on [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica|Chris's previous assault on ED]]. It appears that this profoundly lame attack of his had bigger impact on him, because in 19 April 2010, he set up an article in CWCipedia to [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=The_Christian_Truth list his revised truths].
{{quote|Because the Trolls and ALL such [[Chris and hypocrisy|Pig-Headed, Closed-Minded Idiots]] REFUSE to let me TELL them the Truth on THEIR websites with My Own Past Edits they have Undone, HERE is Where I Correct Some to Most of Their Pages filled with Half-Truths, Exaggerations and Lies.|Chris, glorious edit-warrior, having just suffered an epic defeat in the hands of an unjust wiki [[Manajerks|administration]].}}

Chris's only response to the CWCki in this form was the article he made for the CWCipedia named [[Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts (CWCipedia page)|Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts]]. In it, Chris supposedly "set the record straight" about all the women in his life listed on the CWCki who we had supposedly gotten our facts wrong about, telling us what actually happened, (because we all know that Chris is far less biased than the CWCki when it comes to the subject of his own life). Naturally, he listed [[Ivy|several]] [[PandaHalo|women]] on there who were actually confirmed trolls working for the [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (message board)|people who run this very site]], thus proving that Chris's "truths" and "corrections" were really [[lies]] and mistakes all along.

Chris would later come back to the CWCki under the name [[JenkinsJinkies]], a poor [[disguises|disguise]] that fooled no-one, but one which the administrators played along with for a [[Laughs Under Lucricities|laugh]]. After a few more minor [[List of Christian's edits to the CWCki|edits]], Chris eventually left the site again, as the administrators had fooled him into thinking he had been noticed by the higher-ups and let into the secret inner circle of the [[Trollin Train|trolling cabal]]. This is what eventually led to the [[The MovingFoward videos|PS3 destruction videos]].

Following the [[28 October 2011|October 2011 Michael Snyder Bash-smash-ween]], Chris showed up as [[User:Christianchandler|Christianchandler]] to upload photographs of Snyder and The GAMe PLACe, and to accuse Snyder of being '''fat''', child-molesting and "slender" (bolding and sarcasm quotes his).
As evidenced by a Facebook post of his, Chris seems to have come to understand that the CWCki exists purely to document information that is gathered about him, and plays no direct role in the trolling he experiences. He seems to have diverted his hatred to 4chan and 888chan, for reasons that remain unclear. He most likely is also thankful that his [[Scrapbook of Fail]] has survived in digital form after the [[Destruction Of Chris's House|fire]].

That was, until [[January 2015]], when Chris posted a long tirade on Facebook, criticizing people who "haze" him on ED and this very wiki.
==References by Chris==
* [[Wallflower E-mails 3]] - Chris is made aware of the CWCki's existence by his [[gal-pal]] who discovered the site and assumed it was created by Chris.
* [[Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts (CWCipedia page)]] - After seeing how well the CWCki documented all of his past relationships with women, Chris created this page to share [[Chris and reality|his side of the story]].
* [[Jackie Chat 1]] - Chris gives [[Jackie]] specific examples of how he thinks the CWCki "slanders" him.
* [[JenkinsJinkiesCwckiApplication.MOV]] - [[JenkinsJinkies]] pledges allegiance to [[Clyde Cash]] and the CWCki.
* [[LittleBigPlanet]] - In [[February 2011]], Chris posted [http://lbp.me/v/w4vcbs a quote] on his LittleBigPlanet profile and demanded that it be added to the CWCki's front page.
* [[Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia]] - In [[July 2011]], Chris warn his [[Tomgirl|gal-pals]] against the danger of CWCki and internet bullies
* [[Calling Out]] - In [[August 2011]], Chris demands two trolls to remove their contributions or suffer the consequences.
* [[Victory Rockout]] - Chris states (read: yells incoherently) that the CWCki is a "damn lie" and to never trust it. Apparently, if you wish to ask questions, [[Mailbag|ask him personally]] and he will [[Lie|answer with honesty]].
* [[Facebook#Maniacal Laughter from Who now? Oh, wait, It Is ME! >8D|Facebook, 28 April 2012]] - in which Chris discovered the CWCki forum (link to it is admittedly hard to find on the main page, as you ''actually need to scroll down'') and launched a dastardly misinformation campaign of epic proportions. And it totally worked, according to Chris anyway!
* [[October 2013 Facebook Posts]]- Along with many other things, Chris blames [[Megan]] for the creation of the CWCiki.
* [[January 2014 Facebook Posts]]- Mentions the CWCki along with [[4chan]].
* [[June 2014]] - Chris tries to sell his [[Original Sonichu and Rosechu Drawing‎]] on [[eBay]]. He also told everyone to spend money on it instead of donating to the CWCki.
==See also==
*[[JenkinsJinkies]]
*[[List of Christian's edits to the CWCki]]
*[[CWCipedia]]
*[[CWCki Forums]]

[[Category:CWCki]]
[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Websites]]
[[Category:Things Chris hates]]

CWCki

2016-11-06T18:23:27Z

Caldymugs: Added new description to error photo

{{Articleofthenow}}
''This is the article for the wiki ''about'' Chris. For more information about the wiki written ''by'' Chris, please see [[CWCipedia]]''.

[[Image:TypicalCWCkiPage.png|200px|thumb|CWCki home page
[[Image:Cwcki2009.JPG|200px|thumb|Popularity of the CWCki throughout the years.]]

The '''CWCki''' (pronounced "quick-ee") was created by [[Cogsdev]], as the [[ED]] page was getting far too large for people to take. It serves as the Internet's only wiki devoted to [[Christian Weston Chandler]], the infamous [[autistic]] manchild. As with any wiki, anyone can edit it, even YOU. Seriously though, if you're reading this, you are qualified and should be editing (Just read [[Help:A Quick Guide to CWCki|this]] first).
As stated in its motto, '''NO SHIT IS TOO MINOR'''.

==History==
[[Image:CWCkicopter.JPG|thumb|right|One of the many members of the CWCki team, on the hunt for more information regarding autistic manchildren.]]

The CWCki came to life on 110mb, the land of shitty web servers that go down every damn day.
Before the CWCki moved to sonichu.com, it had a history of outages caused by shit servers and counter-trolls. This is a history of the CWCki:
* [[October 2008]]: 110mb shut down all its service for two entire weeks out of nowhere just to move to a different data center.
* 25 [[January 2009]]: The CWCki's MediaWiki incarnation is founded.
* [[White knight|Someone]] complained to 110mb in [[August 2009]] and everything got shut down. Then a day or two later, it was back up again.
* Due to maintenance, 110mb was closed from 13 September to 18 [[September 2009]].
* 4 [[January 2010]]: Finally, after the 9001st outage, the CWCki moved to Cogsdev.org.
* 26 [[June 2010]]: cogsdev.110mb.com is terminated from the server it was on.
* 7 [[November 2010]]: The CWCki moves from Cogsdev.org to Sonichu.com having obtained the domain name.
* 1 [[March 2016]]: [http://blog.areyouahuman.com/goodbye_playthru| Captcha Service] for the CWCki shuts down.
{{-}}
==Forum==

{{main|CWCki Forums}}

The '''[http://cwckiforums.com CWCki Forums]''' is frequented by many of the wiki regulars and other people interested of all things Christorical.

Previously hosted on Yuku, the forum was hosted on Forumer until 8 November 2012 when it was deleted off Forumer's servers. It had several relief forums until it had a permanent forum.

==Chris's opinion==
{{quote|With that, I respectfully ask the webmaster of the Unapproved and Detested CWCki to remove ALL PAGES Classified under their "[[Template:People|Christian Weston Chandler's Web Of Life]]" and "[[Template:Sweethearts|Sweethearts, heartsweets and gal-pals]]" Categories. I give him until Midnight of Friday March 12, 2010, Eastern Standard Time, for the Webmaster of that CWCki to Remove ALL OF THOSE PAGES, [[Chris and his Ego|or there will be trouble upon that Person directly from Me]].|[[Chris]], after discovering the CWCki, 02:03, 11 [[March 2010]] (CET).}}

The CWCki, like everything else on the [[Internet]] that criticizes him or depicts him unfavorably, is something that Chris hates. In the quote above Chris displays large amounts of his [[ego]] and as usual issues a [[death threat]]. Unfortunately for Chris, his demands did not go through. There are two reasons for this. First, his [[Clyde Cash|past track record with serious threats]] suggests that he [[stress|lacks the energy]] to put his ideas into action. Secondly, CWCkians are well aware of the solid legal standing of the website and will not cave to idle threats from autistic manchildren.

In the wee hours of 14 March 2010, Chris updated his blog, taking credit for the alteration of [[The Wallflower]]'s page and demanding that the rest of the pages mentioned earlier follow suit on or before 31 March or there would be trouble. [[Pocket knife|He IS armed]]. However, in true Chris fashion, midnight of 31 March passed with Chris doing absolutely jack shit. As if anyone was surprised.

On 2 April 2010, he tried to fulfill his threat, by making [[List of Christian's edits to the CWCki|3 minor edits]] under the name of [[User:GodofThunderGodofWar|GodofThunderGodofWar]], obviously forgetting that CWCki editors are not ''entirely'' unaware of Chris's recent favorites in video game field. His edits were reverted immediately and his user and user talk pages were bombarded with negative comments. The edits so far were mostly done to glorify him, and are not exactly the kind of hard-hitting bombastic protest CWCkians were expecting based on [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica|Chris's previous assault on ED]]. It appears that this profoundly lame attack of his had bigger impact on him, because in 19 April 2010, he set up an article in CWCipedia to [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=The_Christian_Truth list his revised truths].
{{quote|Because the Trolls and ALL such [[Chris and hypocrisy|Pig-Headed, Closed-Minded Idiots]] REFUSE to let me TELL them the Truth on THEIR websites with My Own Past Edits they have Undone, HERE is Where I Correct Some to Most of Their Pages filled with Half-Truths, Exaggerations and Lies.|Chris, glorious edit-warrior, having just suffered an epic defeat in the hands of an unjust wiki [[Manajerks|administration]].}}

Chris's only response to the CWCki in this form was the article he made for the CWCipedia named [[Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts (CWCipedia page)|Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts]]. In it, Chris supposedly "set the record straight" about all the women in his life listed on the CWCki who we had supposedly gotten our facts wrong about, telling us what actually happened, (because we all know that Chris is far less biased than the CWCki when it comes to the subject of his own life). Naturally, he listed [[Ivy|several]] [[PandaHalo|women]] on there who were actually confirmed trolls working for the [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (message board)|people who run this very site]], thus proving that Chris's "truths" and "corrections" were really [[lies]] and mistakes all along.

Chris would later come back to the CWCki under the name [[JenkinsJinkies]], a poor [[disguises|disguise]] that fooled no-one, but one which the administrators played along with for a [[Laughs Under Lucricities|laugh]]. After a few more minor [[List of Christian's edits to the CWCki|edits]], Chris eventually left the site again, as the administrators had fooled him into thinking he had been noticed by the higher-ups and let into the secret inner circle of the [[Trollin Train|trolling cabal]]. This is what eventually led to the [[The MovingFoward videos|PS3 destruction videos]].

Following the [[28 October 2011|October 2011 Michael Snyder Bash-smash-ween]], Chris showed up as [[User:Christianchandler|Christianchandler]] to upload photographs of Snyder and The GAMe PLACe, and to accuse Snyder of being '''fat''', child-molesting and "slender" (bolding and sarcasm quotes his).
As evidenced by a Facebook post of his, Chris seems to have come to understand that the CWCki exists purely to document information that is gathered about him, and plays no direct role in the trolling he experiences. He seems to have diverted his hatred to 4chan and 888chan, for reasons that remain unclear. He most likely is also thankful that his [[Scrapbook of Fail]] has survived in digital form after the [[Destruction Of Chris's House|fire]].

That was, until [[January 2015]], when Chris posted a long tirade on Facebook, criticizing people who "haze" him on ED and this very wiki.
==References by Chris==
* [[Wallflower E-mails 3]] - Chris is made aware of the CWCki's existence by his [[gal-pal]] who discovered the site and assumed it was created by Chris.
* [[Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts (CWCipedia page)]] - After seeing how well the CWCki documented all of his past relationships with women, Chris created this page to share [[Chris and reality|his side of the story]].
* [[Jackie Chat 1]] - Chris gives [[Jackie]] specific examples of how he thinks the CWCki "slanders" him.
* [[JenkinsJinkiesCwckiApplication.MOV]] - [[JenkinsJinkies]] pledges allegiance to [[Clyde Cash]] and the CWCki.
* [[LittleBigPlanet]] - In [[February 2011]], Chris posted [http://lbp.me/v/w4vcbs a quote] on his LittleBigPlanet profile and demanded that it be added to the CWCki's front page.
* [[Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia]] - In [[July 2011]], Chris warn his [[Tomgirl|gal-pals]] against the danger of CWCki and internet bullies
* [[Calling Out]] - In [[August 2011]], Chris demands two trolls to remove their contributions or suffer the consequences.
* [[Victory Rockout]] - Chris states (read: yells incoherently) that the CWCki is a "damn lie" and to never trust it. Apparently, if you wish to ask questions, [[Mailbag|ask him personally]] and he will [[Lie|answer with honesty]].
* [[Facebook#Maniacal Laughter from Who now? Oh, wait, It Is ME! >8D|Facebook, 28 April 2012]] - in which Chris discovered the CWCki forum (link to it is admittedly hard to find on the main page, as you ''actually need to scroll down'') and launched a dastardly misinformation campaign of epic proportions. And it totally worked, according to Chris anyway!
* [[October 2013 Facebook Posts]]- Along with many other things, Chris blames [[Megan]] for the creation of the CWCiki.
* [[January 2014 Facebook Posts]]- Mentions the CWCki along with [[4chan]].
* [[June 2014]] - Chris tries to sell his [[Original Sonichu and Rosechu Drawing‎]] on [[eBay]]. He also told everyone to spend money on it instead of donating to the CWCki.
==See also==
*[[JenkinsJinkies]]
*[[List of Christian's edits to the CWCki]]
*[[CWCipedia]]
*[[CWCki Forums]]

[[Category:CWCki]]
[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Websites]]
[[Category:Things Chris hates]]

User:Caldymugs

2016-11-06T13:34:34Z

Caldymugs: Created page with "hello"

hello

Cville Pride

2016-11-06T13:32:30Z

Caldymugs: Fixed spelling mistake

[[File:CvillePrideLogo.jpg|thumb|right|150px]]
'''Cville Pride''', formally the Charlottesville Pride Community Network, is a prominent LGBTQ organization in [[Charlottesville]], [[Virginia]]. Ever since [[Christian Weston Chandler|Chris]] came out as a [[homos|lesbian]] in mid-2014, the group has been an important conduit for his emergent participation in the LGBTQ community.

==Pride Festival==

Back when he was a raging homophobe, a gay pride festival was the last place on earth Chris would have wanted to find himself. He was deeply upset when, in 2009, the fanclub [[Gay 4 Sonichu]] displayed a float of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] for one of their “UGH!!!... pride parades.”<ref>[[Common Questions]]</ref> All this changed on 14 [[August 2014]], when Chris came out on [[Facebook]] "as a [[Tomgirl]], Intersex of Female Soul with Male Body, and a Tranny Cross-Dresser," later clarified (if you can call it that) as "a Lesbian Identified Male and Cross-Dressing Transgender." He immediately expressed an interest in attending "Pride Parades," where he thought he could get some play.<ref>[[August 2014 Facebook Posts#Chris comes out...kinda]] and [[August 2014 Facebook Posts#On the prowl for centerfolds]]</ref> At the urging of his [[gal-pals]], he took the initiative to attend the third annual Charlottesville Pride Festival, organized by Cville Pride, on 14 [[September 2014]]. It was held in Lee Park in downtown Charlottesville, and featured drag performances and information booths. He had planned to attend with [[Catherine]], but at the last minute she came down with a case of car trouble.<ref>[[Catherine E-mails#Empathy lessons]]</ref> Chris hung out for a few hours, and then went home and posted about it on Facebook.

<center><gallery>
File:Pride 4.jpeg
File:Pride 3.jpeg
File:Pride 2.jpeg
File:Pride 1.jpeg
File:Chris pride B.jpg
</gallery></center>

{{Quote|I was at the Pride Festival today, and I really felt accepted and liked among the LGBT community; like I do belong there as the Lesbian Transgender that I am, and a lot of [[Women's rights|real women]] there showed me kindness and respect. :) I feel better about myself for that. But I was not in the mental state to meet new people yet, but I did make some acquaintances; talked with some of them for a bit. But I do feel that I really want to do more with the community, so I may join up with the C-Ville Pride, or something; I have some pamphlets and details. I will make my own decisions!|Chris on Facebook, 13 September 2014<ref>[[September 2014 Facebook Posts#The Pride Festival]]</ref>}}

Not long after this, he added "Lee Park" as one of his Places on his Facebook page.

==Bowling Night==
While the full extent of Chris's involvement with Cville Pride is unclear, he soon took to keeping track of their events on Facebook, liking articles regarding lesbian or transgender issues. Chris's next verified Cville Pride event was "LGBTQ Youth & Family Bowling Night" on 10 [[June 2015]], which put him back $5.00.

[[File:ChrisBowlingFacebook.png|center]]

While it was open to "all ages," it is not clear if the organizers were imagining 33 as a serious number. Nevertheless, Chris went, again at the urging of his gal-pals, and seems to have had a good time, based on the photos posted on the Facebook page.

<center><gallery>
File:ChrisBowling.jpg
File:ChrisBowling2.jpg
File:ChrisBowling3.jpg
File:ChrisBowling4.jpg
File:ChrisBowling5.jpg
</gallery></center>

[[Weens]] couldn't resist trying to ruin Chris's fun, though:

[[File:Bowling ween.png|center]]

All the photos were quickly removed.

==Pride Night at Firefly==
[[File:Cwcpridenight-png.37435.png|center|thumb|400px]]

Chris noted on Facebook that he would be attending another Cville Pride-hosted event, "Pride Night at Firefly," a casual meetup at a Charlottesville restaurant, on 18 July 2015. At present it's not known if he attended or how many children he weirded out. That evening, however, he did put in an appearance at [[Impulse Gay Social Club|Impulse]].

==In 2015==
[[File:Pridefest.png|right|thumb|200px|Facebook announcement.]]
On 19 September 2015, Chris returned to the annual Charlottesville Pride Festival in Lee Park. He was in generally good spirits but all was not perfect in Cwcville:

{{quote|I am at ‪#‎CVillePride‬ . Having a good and safe time. Only complaint is no woman friend/partner to cuddle or hold hands with.|Chris on Facebook.<ref>[[September 2015 Facebook Posts#Still Want Woman]]</ref>}}

This time around, instead of sitting by himself, he was affiliated with a local mental health service with a booth at the event. According to a reputable field agent, he wore a blue sleeveless top and white skirt with his [[Sonichu medallion]]. He had set up a bulletin board advertising his comic, and whiled away his time drawing caricatures and passing out flyers.<ref>[[https://kiwifar.ms/threads/fb-9-19-chris-is-having-a-good-time-at-cville-pride-but-wants-woman.12734/#post-984267]]</ref> [[Weens]] attempted to ruin his day, but the decent folk of the [[Kiwi Farms]] thwarted the effort, thereby gaining karma.<ref>[[https://kiwifar.ms/threads/which-one-of-you-fuckers-did-this.12741/]]</ref>

==In 2016==
Chris attended, bringing along his toy dolls (one an effigy of himself) and pretended that the two were on a date together.

He was briefly interviewed at the event, in [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yXreRh98M4A&feature=youtu.be&t=159 a video] which surfaced on 7 October. In response to the interviewer's question on the number of genders that exist, Chris answered with fifty-eight. Chris had gotten that number from an article on the number of gender options a Facebook user can choose.

[[File:HOW MANY GENDERS ARE THERE.png|thumb|Chris, at Cville Pride 2016]]

'''Transcript'''

''Interviewer'': Hey, look who it is. It's Christian Weston Chandler. How many genders are there?

''Chris'': Oh, I just learned, there's, like, 58.

'''Facebook posts from the event'''

{{quotebox|17 September at 4:44 pm
I really did not know how many genders there are, but I am not and do not judge. Have a good day.

<nowiki>At #CVillePride2016</nowiki>

http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/headlines/2014/02/heres-a-list-of-58-gender-options-for-facebook-users/
}}

{{quotebox|17 September at 5:25 pm
Vinyl and I are enjoying the music at #CVillePride2016.

[[File:Cwc and vinyl dolls at Cville Pride 2016.jpg|250px]]
}}

==See also==
*[[Impulse Gay Social Club]]

==References==
<references/>

==External Links==
[http://cvillepride.org/ Cville Pride homepage]

[https://www.facebook.com/cvillepride Cville Pride Facebook page]

[[Category:Social life]]