CWCki - User contributions [en]

Kimmi

2010-06-11T04:02:37Z

Caturday:

{{honest}}

{{taxpayermoney}}

[[Image:Aiko-Chris's New Bird.jpg|thumb|right|I blew up your body... BUT YOU BLEW MY MIND!]]
[[Image:Kimmi_troll.jpg|thumb|left|Kimmi's final form.]]

{{quote|Kimmi may look shy, but she’s always ready and willing to satisfy your every need! Eager to learn about sex, she’s a Japanese animé girl come to life! She’s about 5’ tall with a removable, realistic, life-like 4” deep UR3 vagina to take you and drain you dry. Durable inflatable design. Rescue her, teach her, be her animé hero and lover!|AdamEve.com product description}}

'''Kimmi''' (full name: ''Kimmi the Anime Love Doll'', alternatively known as "''Aiko''" on some sex toy sites, in case you want to shop around) is perhaps the most notorious of [[Christian]]'s [[sex toys]]. Chris has a reputation of dumping girls at a whim, but on the 20th of February, the entire [[Sonichu]] community was shocked and appalled when they heard the news that Chris had cheated on his only ONE and TRUE love, [[Officer Nasty]], for some Asian slut by the name of Kimmi.

The shocking events were uncovered due to the leaking of the infamous [[sex tape]] - a video so shocking, it made the Paris Hilton sex tapes look like something that would be shown on the Disney channel.

Needless to say, Kimmi noticed Chris's womanizing traits right away when he constantly referred to her as [[Julie]].

After moving on to [[Ivy]], Chris has further abused Kimmi by taping a drawing of Ivy's face to her and profusely slobbering all over it.

Chris's habit of using Kimmi to represent his various e-girlfriends has led many new to the Chris-Chan story to believe that Julie/Ivy was, in fact, no more than a sex doll and a voice in Chris's head, rather than the master [[trolls]] they were.

Recently on The Cleveland Show, it was revealed that Holt had a sex doll named Kimmi that he buried near a river. Whether or not it was inspired by this Kimmi is debatable, as evidence shows that Seth McFarline has referenced Chris a few times in his works (For example in the Family Guy parody of ''Stand By Me'' , Peter, already fat and donning glasses, wears a clown shirt and looks just like Chris.)

==Gallery==
[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|Chris and Kimmi having an intimate moment.|thumb]]

<center>
<gallery>
Image:Fakeout-makeout.jpg|Chris forces Kimmi to undergo cosmetic surgery, changing her outward appearance to that of Ivy
Image:Fakeout-makeout2.jpg|Then proceeds to suck plastic face
Image:Fakeout-makeout3.jpg|Chris apprehends Officer Kimmi
Image:Fakeout-makeout4.jpg|Chris assaulting an on-duty officer
</gallery>
</center>

==See also==
*[[Chris and sex]]
*[[Julie]]
*[[Officer Nasty]]
*[[Sex tape]]
*[[The Return of Kimmi]]
*[[Sex toys]]

==External links==
*[http://megaupload.com/?d=18NA6ERG The Chris-chan/Kimmi sex tape]
*[http://www.adameve.com/adult-sex-toys/love-dolls/sp-kimme-anime-love-doll-12216.aspx The Love Doll]

{{Sweethearts}}

[[Category:Sweethearts]]
[[Category:Things Chris has had Sex with]]

User:Caturday

2010-06-11T03:14:40Z

Caturday:

See [http://www.youtube.com/user/sonicobbsessedr2]. Despite my Youtube username, I am no longer a sonic fag, I was up until I hit puberty, then I stoped enjoying it, I used that name because It is the one I used before losing my fandom, and I wanted to have the same username as my other accounts so they may be associated, but lately I have been starting to use Caturday, Caturday2, and BornOnCaturday. I became interested in the troll life sometime in late 2008.
{{americunt}}
{{straight}}

User:Caturday

2010-06-11T03:12:07Z

Caturday: Created page with 'See [http://www.youtube.com/user/sonicobbsessedr2]. Despite my Youtube username, I am no longer a sonic fag, I was up until I hit puberty, then I stoped enjoying it, I used that …'

Chris and race

2010-06-11T03:00:20Z

Caturday: /* Jews */

[[Image:GrandWizards4Sonichu.jpg|thumb|250px|Chris approves as he attends a [[Gay4Sonichu|Klansmen 4 Sonichu]] meetup]]
[[Image:Niggersjews.jpg|thumb|Chris's view of other races.]]

[[Christian Weston Chandler]]'s '''racist tendencies''' can be traced at least partially to his southern heritage, but certain other factors seem to imply that the rest of his worldview on race comes from stereotypes depicted by popular culture. In some cases, however, Chris seems to be completely unfamiliar with even the stereotypes, opting to make up a bunch of bullshit off the top of his head.

==African Americans==
{{main|Niggos}}

Chris demonstrates many instances of intolerance and racism, both intentional and unintentional. His racism comes from several sources: [[Bob Chandler|his father]], his isolated formative years, television, and his complete ignorance of everything that isn't him. Black people, in particular, are a common target for his xenophobia, hence the word "niggo".

==Asians==
In the [[Sonichu (comic)|comics]], Chris portrays [[Punchy]] as a kung-fu master with slanty eyes. While in a mailbag, he was called out on this and retorts by denying that he's Asian. Outside of the comic, Chris also misattributes the origin of kung-fu to Japan, when in actuality it came from [[China]]. He does a racist impression of a Chinese person and claims Japanese and Chinese people sound the same as shown in [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.5]].

In his real life dealings, Chris seems to have a positive or at least neutral view toward Asians. He has stated that he would not exclude Asian women from his [[Love Quest]], and at one point [[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#Eating Spaghetti (36:49 - 38:54)|believed Emily to be part-Asian]]. He also mentioned receiving a graduation gift from Reverend Shin of Chesterfield County's Korean congregation in the [[church audio]].

[[Manajerks|"Turdijerk"]] from "Off-Target" has a vaguely South Asian appearance and the name may also be based on a stereotype of an Indian accent.

[[Image:ChingChong.jpg|thumb|The only known image of "Ching Chong".]]
===Ching Chong===
In the [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009]], Chris present us [[Chris and remorse|sincere apologies]] for having scared a small Chinese girl that [[Ivy]] tutored in art. The child, known only as '''Ching Chong''' (程鍾 ''Zhēng Zhòng'') is now traumatized due to her witnessing a video of Chris drinking his own [[semen|"Navy"]] while innocently browsing [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]. Chris never made a follow-up on the girl and never asked why her name was a known racial slur towards ethnic Asian communities. In the [[Wedding Comic]], Ching Chong is seen [[List of Sonichu characters#Ching Chong|as a flower girl]].

==Native Americans==
{{main|Cherokian Clan}}
[[Image:02-Cheroki-Chan Card2.jpg|thumb|left| This has something to do with Native Americans. No, really.]]
As stated in the main article, despite claiming to have at least one [[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan|Cherokee ancestor]], Chris is completely ignorant of Native American culture. However, unlike other minorities, Chris's opinions and representation of native are a misguided expression of "pride" for his "heritage".

In [[Sonichu 2]]: [[Sonichu 2#Episode 7: Sonichu in "Anchuent Prophecy"|Episode 7]], Chris tries to tie in his "Cherokeeian" heritage with Sonichu lore. He depicts Cherokee characters in his work as white and wearing gold armor ([[Wikipedia:Joseph Smith|Joseph Smith]] would be proud). The actions and spirituality of the Native Americans in his comic have almost no resemblance to any actual people that ever existed.

Chris has also embodied his ignorance of Native American culture in a physical form. For a brief time, Chris blurred his gender roles and began to collect and customize "[[My Little Pony]]" dolls. One of the dolls he crafted was the infamous Cheroki-Chan, a Native American pony. While there is nothing overtly racist about this abomination, it is probably not how Native Americans want to be represented. In the end Cheroki-Chan is just another Mary-Sue for Chris, and pales in comparison to Chris's most infamous portrayal of Native Americans.

In a shocking display of ignorance, Chris attempted to emulate what he perceives as "Native American culture" in a [[War Paint Video]]. In this video Chris wears water washable paint (and a "[[muscle bra]]") and wields a gun in an attempt to frighten trolls into submission. Instead, it served to illustrate his outrageous insensitivity and callowness.

==Jews==
{{quote|I hope that God will forgive you for being so heartless and cruel Michael Snyder! JEW!|[[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|Chris]]}}
In [[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas]], Chris describes how Jews living in [[CWCville]] celebrate [[Wikipedia:Hanukkah|Hanukkah]]. On December 12, members of the CWCville Jewish diaspora set up "Menorah candles" (the "Haunaka" Menorah candelabrum has 7 candles in it, while the traditional Menorah used on Hanukkah IRL has 9) instead of Christmas Trees, with [[Wikipedia:dreidel|dreidels]] lying under them. Since the candle-related symbolism is very much present in the RL Hanukkah rituals, it's in good taste to give CWCville Jews anything candle-related as a gift. e.g., when Sonichu's daughter [[Cerah Rosey]] baked cookies for her friends, she decided to make her Jewish friend Kevin a candle-shaped one. Because Jews surely love to be distinguished from other people on any occasions based solely on their faith, and would take deep offense in receiving a normal nothing-special-shaped cookie as a gift! Also, Hanukkah is the only Jewish holiday, and so candles are super-important to Jews!

The interesting moment is that there actually is a tradition of eating specially baked foods (latke and sufganiyah) on Hanukkah, and vanilla is one of the allowed ingredients used in making them. Not that Chris knows anything about this, mind you.

Near the beginning of Chris' [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|latest]] (unsuccessful) attempt to be unbanned from the [[The GAMe PLACe]], he casually pointed out that Michael Snyder was probably Jewish (although, Snyder is a very common German last name), using his last name as a point of reference. Of course with Chris being the [[slow-in-the-mind|idiot]] he is, it ended with him angrily calling Snyder a Jew. Given the use of the word as an insult, and Chris using it in context with other words denoting a type of sin it shows just how tolerant he is of other religions. In a later video ([[100 2178]]), Chris appears to restrain himself from calling Snyder a "greedy Jew".

==Hispanics==
[[Image:332-Espanolic.jpg|thumb|left|Espanolic, the Spanish Pokémon]]

Aside from his rather tenuous grasp on [[Ricardo Weston Chandler|the]] [[Hotel Ricky Ricardo|Spanish]] [[CWC's Pokésite 2|language]], Chris has created a somewhat racist caricature in the form of [[List of cards from The Wall of Originals|Espanolic]]. It's a grass-type [[Pokémon]] that resembles an anthropomorphized sombrero, and its main attack is confusing its enemies with its "strange language". Its evolved form, Vegaton, has an attack called "Spanish Fly", that puts its enemies to sleep.

Hilariously enough, [[Nintendo]] would later create similar Pokémon named Lombre and Ludicolo, which they did being far less blatantly stereotypical.

So far, the only Hispanic character in the comics is [[Heather Iglesias]], the nanny of [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Children|Sonichu and Rosechu's children]]. Chris is probably trying to be inclusive here, but he isn't creative or intelligent enough to think of anything besides a stereotypical occupation for Hispanic women.

It may also be notable that often times, Chris refers to Hispanic people as being "Spanish". While not totally inaccurate, the word "Spanish" is usually reserved for peoples from continental Spain, whereas "Hispanic" is used for peoples from countries that predominately speak Spanish (a good comparison would be referring to people from Ireland or Scotland as "English").

==Parental influence==
[[Image:GrandWizardBob.jpg|thumb|right|Bob telling Chris the Barack Obama joke.]]

Given that his father [[Bob Chandler]] grew up in the southern United States before the civil rights movement, it is very easy to assume that Bob harbors racist beliefs and has passed at least some of them on to Chris. It is possible Bob also disliked that Chris's high school basketball team had only three white players and the two [[Wikipedia:waterboy|waterboys]] were both white. This line of reasoning was cemented in 2008 when Chris began referring to his father saying that, if elected president, [[Barack Obama]] would "paint the White House black."

==Chris and stereotypes==
Chris's views of cultures besides southern white Christians can also be traced to the television he watches. The typical Adult Swim cartoon includes gratuitous use of stereotype-based humor. Chris takes [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There|''The Boondocks'']]' satire of black stereotypes at face value. He also portrays nearly every person of African descent that appears in Sonichu with bald heads and either [[wikipedia:Golliwogg|round, bulging eyes]] or glasses that resemble such. Finally, he does an impression of the stereotypical black accent, which he apparently confuses with the Jamaican accent, in [[Mumble 4]].

His exposure to anime fuels his misguided views on East Asians. Asians, in his views, [[Excel Saga|excel at]] [[random-access humor]] and [[Punchy|martial arts]].

Chris, despite claiming Cherokee ancestry, doesn't seem to know what a Native American even looks like, as he portrays the [[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan]] as an overtly European person wearing Greco-Roman garb. He also tramples all over their actual rituals and culture simply to implement the [[Anchuent Prophecy]] into his comic.

==Not a racist?==
[[Image:ECP_00024.jpg|thumb|left|Chris being a [[niggo|wiggo]].]]
{{quote|And I am NOT racist, and I like Jews|Chris, in response to a [[Mailbag_6#Rejected_Mailbag|rejected mailbag]] email}}
Chris does not want to be considered a racist. He claims to respect blacks as equals, saying that in CWCville [[Fail|"they can even vote"]], but at best he merely tolerates their existence so long as they stay away from him. Or if they can [[Reggie Fils-Aimé|help him get his inane and idiotic video game made]]. However, he does genuinely like two black people: [[My big 18th party (story)|Kenan & Kel]].

Also, Chris has probably never been told that the voice of [[Sonic]] in the animated series that he loves so much was Jaleel White (AKA Steve Urkel), a black man. If someone told him this, he would probably deny it. However, given that Chris managed to get [[LittleBigPlanet|respect]] for [[Homos|Stephen Fry]]...

He did mention more than once that the reason he doesn't want black girls (but any other race is okay) is because he thinks God told him that his future daughter Crystal must be white, too. (In an [[IRC (17 December 2008)|IRC]], Chris said he has no problem with dating an Asian. Later, in [[Mailbag 35]] he wrote he would date "Asian, Native or Hispanic women, as well as women of all other countries" except the ones being black because he's "Old Fashioned".)

Realistically, Chris is not considered a white supremacist type of racist but more of a xenophobic one. In other words, he's afraid of ethnic groups he's not familiar with. Like most things in his life, [[Chris and reality|Chris has no real knowledge and bases everything off what he's seen on TV]]. Chris's perception of minorities is only what the TV shows him, since encountering them in real life is something that rarely occurs.

===Improved race relations?===
[[Image:CWCRockin4Way.jpg|thumb|left|Chris does not judge a woman by the color of her skin but by the size of her tits.]]

An image leaked on 26 [[September 2009]] showing Chris having sex with three young ladies, including an African American woman. In the [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 10th, 2009|Captain's Log of 10 October 2009]], Chris clarified that the woman with whom he's performing sexual intercourse is "Half And Half" (mixed ancestry). This proves to us that, even if he's ready to touch the [[china|genitals]] of a black woman, he is unable to imagine the sexual intercourse with someone not sharing white ancestry. In fact, there's evidence that [[Crystal_Weston_Chandler_(sister)|shared ancestry may be a turn-on for Chris.]]

It seems that the futility of his [[love quest]] has lead Chris to lower his ridiculously high standards even further, as he did with fat chicks (which he dropped for [[Sarah Jackson]]), and red heads (as he did with [[Ivy]]).

===Nope, no improved race relations===
[[Image:Chrishunwessonkramer.jpg|thumb|"Fitty years ago you'da been hung from a damn dirty tree!"]]

This just in: Chris is a bigot. If anyone had any misconceptions that Chris was anything short of the most horrible person on earth, he ended Sonichu Day by calling Tito the N-word in "[[Chris Drops the N-Bomb]]" and in the [[Surfshack Tito Emails]], making him an official racist. (The repercussions of this event included Jack Thaddeus removing his ads from CWCipedia and Mao taking over the site for a short time, leading to a massive amount of vandalism.) Soon, Chris also called Michael Snyder a Jew (in a derogatory way) in [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean]]. {{clear}}

==Minority characters in Sonichu==
*[[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas|Kevin]] (Jewish, good)
*[[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan]] (Native American, lawful good)
*[[B-Manajerk]] (black, evil)
** Occasionally other [[Jerkop]]s are shown to be black as well. No other minorities are apparent.
*[[Barack Obama]] (half black)
*[[Blake]] (black, evil turned good)
*[[CADD Chef]] (black, evil)
*[[Florance Fisher]] (black, good)
*[[Jerkhief]] (black, lawful evil)
*[[Punchy]] (Chinese-Japanese, good)
*[[Silvana]] (black, evil [said to turn good])
*[[Turdijerk]] (unclear, drawn with tan skin, evil)
*[[Constables Gerald Grant and Louis Perez|Constable Louis Perez]] (black, TRUE and HONEST policemen)
*[[Inos]] (black, [[tobacky]] smoker)
*[[Heather Iglesias]] (Hispanic, lesbian, never seen)
*In the [[Mailbag]], when Chris is confronted about the lack of minorities in his comic he claims that all of his [[Electric Hedgehog Pokemon]] are considered "minorities" in CWCville, implying that he completely missed the point of the question.

==Sauces==
<references/>
{{Chris and}}
[[Category: Chris-chan]]

Chris and the law

2010-06-11T02:46:00Z

Caturday: /* In the comic */

[[Image:116-CWCCop.jpg|thumb|Chris aways keeps an eye out for criminal scum who would dare steal [[Sonichu]].]]

'''Laws''' are rules set up to help keep citizens in check. They are usually enforced by [[Jerkops|the law enforcement]] of that area and penalties are placed on those who don't follow the laws.

For [[Chris]], however, these just serve as another deterrent in his quest for [[china]].

==Understanding==
{{quote|I have been giving him reasons since the police came in June of 2008, and nothing has sunken into that clown head of his.|[[Michael Snyder]]}}

[[Image:Impliedshooting.jpg|thumb|left|Chris implying guns are the answer.]]

Like his grip on [[Chris and reality|reality]], Chris's understanding of the law is tenuous at best. He regularly threatens trolls with legal action, and makes no distinction in severity between a troll threatening violence against Chris and a troll uploading a harmless picture of [[Rosechu]] with a [[pickle]] to the internet. As a matter of fact, Chris himself is prone to making [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|extremely violent threats]], such as threatening to murder [[Vivian]] and her entire family because of the [[audiobooks]]. He's done everything from calling the police to convincing his father to write to then-[[George W. Bush|President Bush]] in an attempt to get rid of his [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page. He has even attempted (poorly) to impersonate the President in a hilarious attempt to convince the trolls at ED to take down his page.<ref>http://encyclopediadramatica.com/index.php?title=Chris-chan&diff=prev&oldid=1997405266</ref> He's even attempted to contact current [[Barack Obama|President Obama]] to stop people from posting gay ads! Chris also believes that the laws in [[CWCville]] and the laws stated in [[Mailbag 55#Draconian fun!|Mailbag 55]] should be enforced ''in real life.''

Chris himself doesn't have much respect for laws and rules, at least when [[Chris and hypocrisy|their enforcement inconveniences him]]. During his time at [[Get-Tar Region|Target]] he didn't see anything wrong with exploiting the free refill policy and loitering for hours at a time in a privately-owned establishment while harassing female customers and apparently [[Attraction Sign|soliciting sex]]. Chris feels that his [[Virgin with Rage|emotional state]] entirely justifies his actions at times, stating in [[Vivitheg's AIM chat|Vivian's AIM Chat]] that he should be excused for disturbing the peace by literally shouting "[[Sonichu 1#Sub-Episode 2: Christian Chandler in "The Rise & Fall of My Heart"|NOOOOOOO!]]" loudly in the middle of a crowded mall.

Self-contradictory to a fault, though, Chris is happy to meticulously follow some laws while ignoring others at the same time. In [[Sonichu Special 4]], his cartoon avatar makes a point of obeying the exact speed limit...while on his way to confront [[CChanSonichuCWC]] and commit assault with a deadly weapon upon him. Any intelligent and decent person could tell you which of these laws is more important, but Chris is neither intelligent nor decent. In [[05142010|a recent video]], Chris states that a man deserves only 20 years in prison for brutally beating his girlfriend to death with his bare hands, which is just twice the penalty he wants for smoking. Also he believes that the archaic practice of hard labor as seen in such venues as Bugs Bunny cartoons still exists.

In addition, Chris has very little respect for [[Jerkops|those who enforce the law]]:

{{quote|Verbal Combat had started, and during the fight, I ran off, still giving verbal punishment, as well as da finger, and many “Curse-Ye-Ha-Me-Has.” I nearly backed up onto him with my car, and I gave him another finger. Then I dashed off. |Excerpt from Chris's [[CWC's Diary|diary]]}}

The above quote pretty much defines Chris's attitude towards law enforcement officials. He feels that it is completely appropriate to flip off, insult, lie to, and ''attempt to hit, with his car,'' people who are simply doing their jobs (although the tale may be exaggerated, it is nonetheless pretty damn awful). And, of course, as any rational person (i.e., anyone who's not Chris) would understand, running away from law enforcement officials is a seriously bad idea. Chris is truly a rebel without a cause or effect.

==Law troubles==

On [[2004|September 11, 2004]], Chris was detained at the [[Fashion Square Mall]] for loitering, and continually arguing with the staff over a number of months. The incident is depicted in [[Sub-Episode 1]]. Chris was banned from returning to the mall on his own and without his parents' company. However, it appears that this ban was lifted or ignored soon afterward.

On [[July 2005|July 20, 2005]], Chris was charged with disorderly conduct and trespassing at [[Target]]<ref name="Criminal Searches">[http://www.criminalsearches.com/details.aspx?id=w1x00xC8&vw=criminal&1=Wpem9DAEtHH%2fFwSXuzfStJ2LvpHgv1YXUU3kPiyr3%2fQ%3d&input=name CriminalSearches.com], which has the Virginia Administrative Office of the Courts as their source</ref>, as depicted in [[Sub-Episode 7]] and [[Sub-Episode 8]]. After two hearings,<ref name="Criminal Searches" /><ref>[[MySpace#Lindsay]]</ref> prosecutors chose to drop the case and Chris was not punished.

Five days later, on [[July 2005|July 25, 2005]], Chris caused an auto accident when he followed another car too closely and rear-ended it. This went to court on September 12th.<ref name="Criminal Searches" /> He was fined $30 and had to pay $56 in costs.

Chris's various run-ins at [[The Game Place]] has resulted in the cops being called on him a couple times; at least once after Chris called in his parents after he was initially banned from the location and tried to weasel his way back in, and again when he [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|trespassed on the property]], though he wasn't charged with anything on either occasion. It is likely that the only reason Chris isn't sitting in a cell right now for violating Virginia law is because he wasn't at The Game Place when the cops showed up after his April 2010 unbanning attempt.

On 4 [[June 2010]], Chris made yet another pilgrimage to The Game Place, violating his ban once again. Chris was armed with his camera, and while Mike was concerned that Chris wanted pictures of his daughter for [[Mass Debating|disturbing reasons]], Chris maintains that he merely wanted a picture of Mike [[Death threats|for use as a dartboard]]. Still disturbing, but in entirely different ways. This time Chris was actually caught on the scene, despite trying to run away, and was questioned by the police, who made him delete the pictures he had taken, and basically told him to quit his shit. Chris made his [[6 June 2010]] video in response to these events.

==Chris's parents and law==

It's not hard to figure out why Chris thinks the law should serve him and him alone. His parents, too, have the same problem.

* When Chris was thrown out of the Cub Scouts for an unknown event, his parents attempted to sue the Boy Scouts of America for discrimination.
* When Chris threw a tantrum that required him to be restrained, Bob attempted to sue the school.
* When [[Mimms]] and [[Lucas]] took a picture of Chris and uploaded it to the internet, Chris's parents threatened them with legal action (but never followed through).
* When Snorlax thought she had indigestion(actually colitis), she acted like she was going to sue the Chinese place the food came from. When the doctor actually explained what happened, she dropped the subject.
* When Snorlax was faced with the police after she confronted Michael Snyder in 2008, she chose to harp on the fact that nobody offered her a chair. Her behavior suggested that she was planning to sue the Game Place for exercising its right to ban Chris, but the police called her bullshit.
* Chris's later recollection of the subject includes an absurd accusation that Michael Snyder had a criminal history--it is possible that Bob or Snorlax brought this up and Chris is simply parroting it.
* Chris inherited his love of running from problems--when his parents had their absurd case against Greene County used against them, their first reaction was to run to another county.
* Chris, after attempting to "apologize" to Mary Lee Walsh, was given a trespassing notice. Since, by his own admission, he didn't learn about the contents of the letter until later, it is likely that his parents ordered him to not read the important letter so they could claim that they never got one when Chris inevitably did it again.

==Chris's ORIGINAL and OFFICIAL laws==
[[Image:AL cover.gif|thumb|Where Chris's ORIGINAL and OFFICIAL laws come from.]]

As he believes the police in real life are corrupt and sees them in the same light as he sees the [[jerkop]]s in his comic, Chris has his own spin on the law. The penalties for [[Alcohol|drinking]], [[Tobacky|smoking]] and [[troll|internet harassment]] involve physical violence including a "Kick in the Teeth" which Chris portrays as a punch in [[Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008|the only one]] of his supposed series of Q&A videos.

On new years eve, 2009, Chris presented a nice babble about a law he wants made to prevent [[Jack Thaddeus]] from using adspace he paid for.

{{quote|I Have The Instinct, and I Have Already Snail-Mailed President [[Barack Obama]] on how this sort of bad advertisement is going on and how it is Wrong and should be made Illegal. On HOW if the Main Captain does not WANT or IS OFFENDED with the listed Ads within his own Website or Works, REGARDLESS of who controls the AdSpace, WOULD REMOVE THOSE ADS or face JAILTIME. And the F.B.I. would be FULLY INVOLVED in all this, and THEY have the Power, Tools and Balls to seek, hunt down and bring in the Individual Internet Trolls and Ad-Spammers.|Chris, [[Chris and his Ego|Thinking he's important]]}}

Yes, you heard it right. Chris wants to ask the President of the United States to make [[Chris and Reality|advertisements he doesn't want illegal.]] From a practical standpoint, CWCipedia is the only wiki that has a "Main Captain". This "Main Captain" does literally nothing to run or maintain the site at all. Furthermore, if someone paid for adspace, the host that received the money must allow the purchasing party to use said adspace for the allotted time, no matter what they advertise, or the host faces legal penalties. And last but not least, the President has better things to do than slap laws on Wikis.

This attitude is also reflected on his relationship with [[Mary Lee Walsh]]. [[2003|Years ago]], She interrupted Chris in what looked like [[Love Quest#Conflicts with Mary Lee Walsh|soliciting for sex]]. [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|Hilarity ensued]] and Chris received some well-deserved [[Autism papers|time-out]] for [[Chris and anger|his antics]]. Fast-forward in [[2009]] when Chris, [[One Blessing, and One Curse|out of the blue]], decides to make peace. He went to her office and left her a [[:File:Apology_to_Mary_Lee.jpg|"Framed Hand-Drawn Apology"]] on her doorsteps. Knowing Chris's attitude, she filled a trespassing notice. In pure stalker logic, Chris said that since he didn't read the letter and returned it to the sender, [[Mailbag 26#Mary Lee Walsh trolls IRL|he's not legally liable]].

[[Mailbag 55#Draconian fun!|Mailbag 55]] posits a few more original laws: one, that it should be illegal for men to ever show their bare chest (because, according to Chris, no one in the entire world ever wants to see a man's bare chest, no matter what shape he's in). He also wants to force all women in any kind of relationship to wear rings, thus defeating all symbolism and significance of them.

TL;DR: Chris ignores the law when it's inconvenient, yet expects it to save the day when the [[Autism]] card doesn't work.

==In the comic==

Chris's understanding of the law in his comics goes so far as to been seen as a mixture of childish tendencies and, some might say, dictatorial tendencies. In CWCville, Chris has banned a number of things in his city. Smoking or drinking alcohol would lead one to be either sentenced to 10 years in jail or a much more lenient $1500 USD fine.<ref>[[Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008]]</ref> However, it should be noted that Chris [[Rollin' and Trollin'|repealed the law]] in June 2009. Even stranger is the the fact that the city tends to lack other races or even other sub-cultures, beyond Chris, the Sonichus and Rosechus, a handful of (white) males and females, and the few Transformers in his town. This lack of diversity leads many to think that Chris has banned them as well. The Rosechus tend to fight for [[women's rights]], that is to say, the ability to strip naked whenever and wherever they want to, not to mention the fact that full women's rights is already established across the U.S., suggesting that Chris has imposed descriminating laws against women in CWCville.
Chris has been seen as a do-nothing mayor, preferring to have [[Allison Amber|his secretary]] do all the work (as per his thoughts on women) while he goes off on another one of his sweetheart searches. He has mandated "Dating Education" classes for students so that they can learn to go on dates, as well as how to "stay straight". [[List_of_Sonichu_characters#Constables_Gerald_Grant_and_Louis_Perez|Actual police officers]] did not appear until [[Sonichu 10|quite late]] and even then, they did nothing whatever, giving the impression that Chris and his Pokemon abominations are the only thing standing in between peace and eternal virgins with rage. However, [[Sonichu 9]] seems to reveal that there are three sets of "other" protectors: a (possibly) nondescript police force, as well as his own team of [[Power Rangers]] and a team of [[Transformers]].

{{quote|Is CWCville under Martial Law? |[[Jack Thaddeus]] citing the truth as he sees it}}

It gets even scarier. In a conversation that [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 3|Chris had with Jack Thaddeus]], he reveals that CWCville is the home of a paramilitary force equipped with tanks he uses as a "Police Force", and all his Electric Hedgehog Pokémon have IMMUNITY FROM PROSECUTION and are over the law. If we add all this to the fact that there're no free elections in CWCville, this shows us the city in the hands of a dictator running it with an iron fist, and backed with super-powered goons who are free to do any atrocity with impunity. According to Chris, Magi-Chan mentally scans the city perimeters for any sexual acts, and reports any homosexual activity to the authorities. The participants are then [[Mailbag 31#Magi-Chan knows when you fuck|"tried and fined HEAVILY; $500 or 50 Hours of Community Service"]]. Apparently in CWCville, the Fourth Amendment to the United States Constitution does not apply in matters of personal sexual choice. This might put him at odds with [[Chris and sex#Pedophilia|his own sexual ideals...]]

In a strange [[Chris and hypocrisy|set of double standards]], Chris has been shown to injure, kill, or damage people and property ''outside of CWCVille''. [[Sonichu 10]] has shown no less than three grievous acts upon others: the destruction of the 4-cent_garbage building, the death of over 100 trolls in said destruction, breaking and entering, and destroying internet files and property. Following the death of Simonla, the culprits (Alec, Mao, Sean and Evan) are subjected to a show trial, and Sean is permitted to act as their lawyer despite being high as a kite. When they're found guilty, they're ''killed by the people they've wronged''.

==See also==
*[[Parody]]

==Sauces==
<references />

{{Chris and}}

[[Category:Chris-chan]]