CWCki - User contributions [en]

2013

2013-08-15T15:26:42Z

Croatchu:

[[File:Facebook1.jpg|thumb|In '''2013''', Chris mourned his expulsion from [[The GAMe PLACe|Heaven]].]]
'''2013''' is the fifth year of organized trolling since Chris's discovery. However, like the [[2011|two]] [[2012|years]] before it, it began with nothing of note, ever since Chris began [[This is how the Trial went|serving out his sentence.]] It remains to be seen if this ordeal (which ended in July) will finally knock some sense into him, though judging from [[Red_Letter_CWC_Certified_Day|past experiences]], it seems pretty unlikely.

However, this year is still notable as being the year where Chris' ego would cause him to become alienated with the few people he has left as "friends" (namely, Anna and the congregation of his church). It even caused him to get chastised for his attention-whoring by a well-known voice actress from [[My Little Pony]] in April. With the death of Bob a couple of years ago and his once-enablers getting tired of his antics, Chris is headed down a road that many have tried and failed to warn him about - one where the number of people willing to tolerate him are getting fewer and fewer.

In May, an [http://imgur.com/a/1HYJJ Imgur account] of all of the Facebook posts made by Chris between 2012 and 2013 was revealed by Chris, shedding some light on what happened during Chris's radio silence since [[Bob_Chandler#Later_life_and_poor_health|the death of his father earlier in 2011]].

==January==
[[File:Mcdonalds.jpg|thumb|January sighting]]
*11 January 2013 - Chris changes his [[Facebook]] [[:File:Facebook1.jpg|picture]] [[:File:Facebook2.jpg|twice]] in one day.
*29 January 2013- Chris is spotted at local McDonald's.

==February==
*24 February 2013 - Chris [[Chris's birthday|turns 31]]

==March==
[[File:Chris march2013.jpg|thumb|Chris in March]]
*8 March 2013 - A photo of Chris in his tomgirl attire is featured on the fourth episode of [[Chris in the media#Failosophy|MTV's ''Failosophy'']].
*9 March 2013 - Chris goes to [http://madicon.org/ Madicon] held this year in Harrisonburg, VA. He's spotted by one of trolls, however no pictures are taken. On Facebook, he [[Facebook#Sonichu is not dead|insists]] that the ''Sonichu'' comic is not dead, despite two years without updates. He also [[:File:Failosophy.PNG|discovers]] that he was on MTV the previous day.
*28 March 2013 - Chris posts a public [[Facebook#Gay Marriage |Facebook message]] whining about repeat media coverage of the Supreme Court's [[:wikipedia:Hollingsworth v. Perry|Proposition 8]] and [[:wikipedia:United States v. Windsor|DOMA]] deliberations.
*30 March 2013 - An [[Other documents#Epistle to the Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|epistle]] from Chris to his [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|church]] is leaked on the CWCki forums. In the document Chris announces that he will be no longer going to church for a period of time. Details about the deterioration of Chris's relationships with his fellow parishioners and church staff are also revealed.

==April==
[[File:Haters to the left.jpg|thumb|250px|left|Chris in April 2013.]]
*4 April 2013 - Chris posts a [[Facebook#Game Place|a new Facebook note]], in which he says he has no more interest in the [[The GAMe PLACe]].
*20 April 2013 - Chris uploads two new Facebook pictures. One of them depicts him holding a sign that reads "Haters to the Left," and points to the viewer's right in typical Chris fashion, while the other one shows him holding a different sign that declares him "[his] own free [[Homos|bitch]]."
*29 April 2013 - Chris posts two [[Facebook]] notes. In the [[Facebook#Sega Mascot Contest |first one]] he expresses his outrage at the news of Sega planning to replace [[Sonic]] as their mascot, not realizing that the news story he is responding to is a fictional one posted on a parody website. In the [[Facebook#"The Trolls Who Cry Woman"|second note]] he bemoans of how he has been trolled in the past by people pretending to be women.

==May==
[[File:Chris facebook pic 5-29-13.jpg|thumb|Chris in May 2013.]]
*4 May 2013- Somebody named [[Anna|"mormonjesus"]] drops in IRC what seems to be [[Emails#2013|email]] Chris sent to [[Kim]] on 1 May.
*6 May 2013 - More [http://www.mediafire.com/view/?y1pp1lop9wx6hdv emails between Chris and Jackie] are leaked on the CWCki forums.
*19 May 2013 - The [[Maggie Thomas call]] which was made in [[September 2009]] was leaked by whispsonichu on the [[CWCki Forums]].
*21 May 2013 - Chris posts up pictures of his iPhone and his broken iPod on his Facebook account, complete with a custom made duct-tape folder for them.
*21 May 2013 - Chris unveils his latest creation, the [[Idea Book Case|iDea Book Case]], via Facebook.
*26 May 2013 - [http://imgur.com/a/1HYJJ An Imgur account] of Chris's formerly hidden Facebook status updates is revealed....by Chris himself.
*29 May 2013 - Chris changes his Facebook profile picture to one featuring the return of the [[Parappa the Rapper|Parappa]] hat.
*30 May 2013 - Chris makes a new [[Facebook]] post, laments that he had more freedom when his father was still alive, and goes onto complain about how he has to take time out of his day to "serve and protect" [[Barb|his mother]].
*31 May 2013 - The Nintendo-run website [[Flipnote Hatena]] shuts down. All flipnotes, including Chris's are no longer able to be shown. A troll let this site know a couple months earlier in order to save Chris's [[art]].

==June==
*6 June 2013 - Chris starts playing Toro's Friend Network and the game is linked to [[Facebook]].
*7 June 2013 - Chris has made 20 friends in Toro's Friend Network according to his [[Facebook]] post. [http://i.imgur.com/EARZYtF.png (Link)]
*9 June 2013 -[[Anna]] posted on [[Facebook]] to Chris that she re-watched his [[DVD of Fail|DVD]] with her married friend. [http://i.imgur.com/lgxayJp.png (Link)]
*9 June 2013 - An [[Jackie E-mails 31|e-mail from Chris to Jackie]] on 7 [[September 2011]] was leaked on the [[CWCki Forums]], where Chris talked about his dream that according to the Grim Reaper, his [[Bob Chandler|father]]'s soul would not be claimed until the year 2015.
*11 June 2013 - Chris has made 30 friends in Toro's Friend Network according to his [[Facebook]] post. [http://i.imgur.com/1iFbV78.png (Link)]
*12 June 2013 - Chris has made 50 friends in Toro's Friend Network according to his [[Facebook]] post. [http://i.imgur.com/LAKqMX0.png (Link)] He is also earning #mPOINTS Rewards in Crackle. [http://i.imgur.com/tTcpJFF.png (Link)]
*13 June 2013 - Chris liked two videos: [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Oa8Nd6H0pU "I Heard the Dog Bark" by Sesame Street] and [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WlinLHR2yl4 My Little Pony Equestria Girls Official Trailer 2] on [[YouTube]] despite he once made a [[Facebook#THEY_ARE_NOT_SERIOUS.21.21.21|Facebook post raging about the Equestria Girls movie a few days ago]]. [http://i.imgur.com/kABCrhy.png (Link)] On the same day, [[Anna]] posts to her friends, including Chris to all go to Disneyland together. [http://i.imgur.com/5AQNS4V.png (Link)]
*16 June 2013 - A picture of [[Son-Chu]] which is photographed on Google Street View in [[June 2011]] is leaked on the [[CWCki Forums]].
*17 June 2013 - Chris posts another Facebook post that [[Facebook#I_am_feeling_very_lonely_again|he is lonely again.]]
*20 June 2013 - A video of [[14 Branchland Court|Chris's house]] on 8 June 2013 is leaked on the [[CWCki Forums]].
*20 and 21 June 2013 - Hidden [[Twitter]] posts from 16 [[April 2012]] to 21 June 2013, which most of them are linked to the [[Facebook]] [[2013 Imgur Leak]] and pictures from 20 June 2013 are leaked on the [[CWCki Forums]].
*22 June 2013 - Chris posts on [[Facebook#Too_many_Trolls_and_Bad_People_in_the_world|Facebook]] that "there are too many [[Trolls]] and Bad People in the world hiding behind the [[Internet]] constantly".
*24 June 2013 - Mary McLerran, relative of [[Anna McLerran|Anna]], posts to Chris on [[Facebook]] that she is sending him good energy. [http://i.imgur.com/LAZA08q.png (Link)]
*27 June 2013 - Chris makes a [[Facebook#A_skunk|Facebook]] post about a skunk.
*29 June 2013 - Chris complains to [[Cole Smithey]] on [[Twitter]].

==July==
[[File:ChrisHowGoodLookingAmI.jpg|thumb|Chris in July 2013.]]
*7 July 2013 - Chris posts on [[Facebook#Ruckersville|Facebook]] about [[Ruckersville]]. On the same day, Chris liked the full movie of Equestria Girls on YouTube.
*10 July 2013 - Chris's year-long probation, [[28 October 2011|passed down by the court]], ended.
*14 July 2013 - Chris posts on [[Facebook#Very_Depressed.|Facebook]] that he is depressed and needs real compassion from women.
*18 July 2013 - Chris posts on [[Facebook#Don.27t_call_me_a_wet_blanket.|Facebook]] that he doesn't want people to call him a wet blanket.
*20 July 2013 - Chris posts on [[Facebook#Spring_Brakers|Facebook]] about ''[[Vanessa Hudgens|Spring Breakers]]'', bizarrely comparing it to [[My Little Pony]] and his life.
*22 July 2013 - Chris uploads a picture on [[Facebook#Stupid_Question.|Facebook]] and asks how good looking/attractive he is. He claims that he now weighs 220 pounds. On the same day, Chris shares a "Britney Spears - Ooh La La (From The Smurfs 2)" video. On the same day, Chris uploads a screenshot from the [[CWCki Forums]] on [[Facebook#The_results|Facebook]] about the results of the poll.
*24 July 2013 - Chris shared a Crackle page on [[Facebook]]. On the same day, Mary McLerran posts on [[Facebook#I.27m_sending_you_love.2C_too|Facebook]] that she loves the hand shape on Chris's profile picture.

==August==
*3 August 2013 - William Elliott Waterman posts to Chris on [[Facebook#You.27re_a_real_nice_guy.2C_Chris|Facebook]].
*5 August 2013 - Chris posts some photos of his high school [[LEGO]] set on [[Facebook#LEGO_High_School|Facebook]].
*6 August 2013 - Chris shared some links of LEGO Heartlake High on [[Facebook#Heartlake_High|Facebook]]. On the same day, Chris posted on [[Facebook#One_of_my_pups_just_peed|Facebook]] that one of his [[Clover_and_Snoopy|pups]] just peed.
*7 August 2013 - Chris liked some videos of [[My Little Pony|Equestria Girls]], posted some posts related to the movie, and put it #2 of his Top Movies list. On the same day, William Elliott Waterman, one of Chris's friends posts a message to the DANG, DIRTY trolls on the CWCki on [[Facebook#William_Elliott_Waterman.27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE|Facebook]].

==September==
*6 September 2013 - The second anniversary of [[Bob Chandler|Bob's]] death from heart failure.

==October==
*1 October 2013 - [[Barbara]]'s 72nd birthday.
*31 October 2013 - [[Halloween]].
==December==
*25 December 2013 - [[Christmas]].

== Sources ==
<references/>

{{Timeline}}
[[Category:Chronology]]

Manchester High School

2013-08-15T15:22:03Z

Croatchu: /* Go Lancers! */

{{Articleofthenow}}
[[Image:Manchesterhigh.jpg|thumb|left|The home to the only decent four years of Chris's life]]
[[Image:CWC12andson.jpg|thumb|right|[[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 2|This is what Chris actually believes]].]]

{{quote|If what you have done yesterday still looks big to you, you haven't done much today.|[[Wikipedia:Mikhail Gorbachev|Mikhail Gorbachev]], perfectly describing Chris in relation to his high school years.}}
{{quote|I had so many friends over there, in high school. And I was just sad to leave, after I graduated. 'Cause I had to leave all my friends. I had the good life.|Chris, ten years after finishing high school, crying alone in his dark, toy-filled bedroom<ref>[[Greene County Conspiracy]]</ref>}}

'''Manchester High School''', located in [[Wikipedia:Midlothian, Virginia|Midlothian, Virginia]], was attended by [[Chris]] from [[1996]] to [[2000]] ([[Wikipedia:Secondary education in the United States#High_school_.28grades_9_through_12.29|ninth grade to twelfth grade]]). Chris portrays this period as among the happiest in his life<ref>[[:Image:0311-CWCNote7.jpg|DVD]], note 7</ref>, even though he proudly slept through a good deal of it.<ref>[[A Week With Christian Chandler]]</ref>

Among Chris's classes were the usual subjects, two years of [[Spanish]],<ref>[[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares#Over the Years|Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares]], page 8</ref> [[Dating education|Sex Ed]], "Coping Skills", and a lot of [[art]] classes. According to Chris, he achieved an ''[[Honor Roll]] Grade Streak ALL THE WAY THROUGH M.H.S.''<ref name="teen">[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile#The Teenage Years]]</ref> However, according to the video [[Song of Christian]], he failed [[English]] class during his sophomore year of high school.

Chris is very proud of the fact that he was mainstreamed throughout high school, even though, the captions under the majority of his teachers' names in the extended slideshow say "special education". This implies that Chris was mainstreamed to the extent that he attended the same school as his typically functioning peers, but nothing more than that. He also rode on the "freakin' Handicapped, Special-Ed bus", an experience which haunts him to this day.<ref name="Jackie Chat 9">[[Jackie Chat 9]]</ref>

Chris was a [[Wikipedia:Water boy|water boy]] (and a "manager", [[Chris and reality|according to him]]) for the Manchester High Lancers [[Bionic|basketball]] team, along with [[Joseph Herring]]. He got a certificate and an embroidery "M" for this work.<ref name="teen" />

==Known Accomplishments==
[[Image:0242-CWC&VarsityBBallTeam97Color.jpg|thumb|Chris happily serving [[niggos]]. Ironic.]]

;10th Grade
* [[Song of Christian|F on English assignment]]

;12th Grade
* September: Praise from his [[English]] teacher for the short story "[[How the Pokémon came into Our Poke Balls]]"
* March: CD cover for ''[[Christian's Favorite Hits!]]''
* April: Naps in class for the self-documentary "[[A Week With Christian Chandler]]"
{{-}}

==Social life==
[[Image:0569-MHSDiploma.jpg|thumb|Chris's diploma. The public school system has failed us yet again]]

Most of Chris's friends were [[gal-pal]]s, not [[Asperchu|joy-boys]]. He had classes and ate lunch with them every other day (the high school has alternating "odd" and "even" days. On odd days he ate alone.<ref>[[A Week With Christian Chandler]]</ref>). There were immature boys on the school bus, which he dreaded. Chris's purported friends:
* [[Kellie Andes]]
* [[Tiffany Gowen]]
* Sarah B.<ref>[[:Image:0310-CWCNote6.jpg|DVD]], note 6; [[A Week With Christian Chandler]], pages 9 and 13</ref>
* Miranda, partner in Science class<ref>[[:Image:0310-CWCNote6.jpg|DVD]], note 6; [[A Week With Christian Chandler]], page 14</ref>
* Molly, happy and giggly<ref>[[:Image:0310-CWCNote6.jpg|DVD]], note 6</ref>
* [[Joseph Herring]]
* Brian, [[JERK|boyfriend]] of Sarah<ref>[[:Image:0310-CWCNote6.jpg|DVD]], note 6; [[A Week With Christian Chandler]], page 8</ref>

In reality, few if any of those people can be legitimately said to have been a friend of Chris. As he himself admits, he spent little time with his so called friends outside of school hours<ref>[[Kacey Call 20]]</ref> and in his [[Song of Christian]] (written at age sixteen) he describes himself as being lonely and isolated.

{{-}}

==Go Lancers!==
[[File:TheLancers.jpg|thumb|100px|The logo of the team Chris uploaded on [[Facebook]] on 9 [[August 2013]].]]
Chris's servitude to the basketball team, probably the only meaningful interaction he had with other [[jerks|males]] throughout his entire adolescence, remains a cherished memory; so much so, that he continues to obsess about it... ''over a decade after graduating''.

A few references were slipped into the comic. In [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]] Manchester High was featured heavily. It begins with [[Christian Weston Chandler (character)|Chris]] hanging around his old school [[Pedofork|without being there on any official business.]] [[Magi-Chan]] then brings Chris and [[Sonichu]] back in time to [[1996#1996|1996,]] when Chris was a student. In [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], [[Megagi La Skunk]] was depicted wearing a Lancers cheerleading outfit.

In [[August 2010]], Chris made a handful of characters and a vehicle in ''[[ModNation Racers]]'' to commemorate his time with the basketball team. The Manchester High ''ModNation'' collection includes the team bus, two of the players, a [[Laura Beth Dorazio|cheerleader]], and Chris himself at age 14, looking as if he's afraid of being jumped by something just behind him.

On 9 [[August 2013]], as Chris continues to fantasise on his high school years, Chris uploaded the logo of the team on [[Facebook]].

{{-}}

==The Bus==

At age 15, Chris was "demoted" from the regular school bus to the Special Ed bus. Out of all the weird, embarrassing details of his life that he has no problem discussing, this is one experience that he has rarely spoken about. It's clear that Chris was scarred by this experience of being forced to spend time with the seriously mentally handicapped, or "[[slow-in-the-mind]] retards" [[CWC-isms|as he calls them]].

Chris switched to the Bus of Doom after a confrontation with another student on the Normal Bus. Much like every other time Chris claims to have been physically assaulted, it is unclear exactly what happened. He has only told the story twice;<ref name="Jackie Chat 9"/><ref>[[Kacey Call 9]]</ref> in one version it sounds like Chris started a fight because he wanted to get off the bus first, and in the other version it sounds like a [[niggo]] punched him for no reason. Whatever happened, Chris cites this incident as the reason for his exclusion from Gen Pop.

==The Seinor Prom==

Chris took his [[Barbara|mom]] to the seinor [sic] prom. [[Gal-pal]] [[Tiffany]] felt sorry for him, and so she asked him to dance, which they did so for what seemed like hours to Chris (and arguably seemed like hours to Tiffany too). Chris hopes to re-enact this historic moment at an upcoming high school reunion.<ref>[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile#The Seinor Prom]]</ref> That is assuming there aren't security guards there for the express purpose of keeping him out.

===Gallery===

<center><gallery>
Image:0539-Prom1.jpg|Stay classy, Virginia.
Image:0540-Prom2.jpg|"Don't go gropin' anyone tonight, Chris... I'm assburgin'."
Image:0541-Prom3.jpg
Image:0542-Prom4.jpg|Chris was probably more interested in the food than the two young ladies.
Image:0543-Prom5.jpg|Chris is feeling all by his lonesome at this point.
Image:0544-Prom6.jpg|Some random people at prom, giving what would be considered a rude gesture in some countries.
Image:0545-Prom7.jpg
Image:0549-Prom11.jpg|Tiffany to the rescue!
</gallery></center>

==Graduation==

[[Image:0558-ChrisChanOfY2KClass.jpg|thumb|Chris in his graduation gown. The white thing around his neck generally indicates [[honor roll]].]]

For Chris, graduation was an emotional experience. In his own words:<ref>[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile#Graduation]]</ref>

{{quotebox|I ONLY got recognized for my Grades with a Star Pin, yet they had [[Chris and English|MORE FANCIER]] AWARDS for more important qualities. I should have been Highly Recognized for [[Chris and art|my ARTISTIC TALENTS]] I showed in my Many Art Classes for the Award Ceremonies before Graduation Day. I felt crestfallen greatly from not getting recognized for [[Chris and his Ego|any of my Talents]]. [[Chris and Anger|I EXCELLED IN MATH TOO FOR THE LOVE OF GOD]]!

I had gotten over the Award Ceremony on the Graduation Day, but to add Lemon Juice to an open wound, it was a Dark and Rainy Day that Day, and they handed out MORE TALENTED AWARDS right before handing out any diplomas. When I went up there to get mine, I was feeling depressed, upset, crestfallen and ticked off. When the award was handed to me, I took it without looking anyone in the eye, and I did not shake anyone's hands. I just walked back to my seat in the Graduating Crowd. Then soon after, I just walked the wrong way up the center aisle, found an isolated table and cried myself out. [[Barbara|My mother]] found me later and comforted me; [[Bob|my father]] was ashamed of the way I acted, and he would later still be angry at recalling the moment. [[Tiffany Gowen|Tiffany]] also found me and gave me a caring moment of condolences back there. I gave her a plush Psyduck as a graduating gift beforehand.}}

[[Image:0565-CWCKellieGrads.jpg|thumb|Chris with [[Kellie Andes]]. Chris would have, for the first time in his life, looked like he dressed sharp, if it wasn't for the fanny pack. Note the award that Kellie is holding.]]

In another retelling, Chris reveals more straight anger:<ref>DVD, graduation notes [[:Image:0566-GraduationNote1.jpg|1]] and [[:Image:0567-GraduationNote2.jpg|2]]</ref>

{{quotebox|So while I sit there and feel happy for my friends who got something, I was so %$@# JEALOUS. I was a High-Functioning Autistic Boy who came WAAAAAAAAAY BEYOND OUT OF HIS SOCIAL SHELL, only to get ZILCH, NADA, ZIP; A BIG FAT ZERO! I felt so Devistated and Out Of Sync :'(

[...]

I ended up doing what I did when I went up there to accept the diploma; NO HANDSHAKE, TEARS, AND RUNNING AWAY TO HIDE. They don't even have any pictures of that in the Y2K Yearbook; the caption should have read, "Student Christian Chandler is Depressed and Sad for some reasons. His response is tears and fright."

Even now as I type this, I am still *&$%^#@ Angry that I didn't get anything for the things I've poured my heart, soul and hand-work into, nor emerged as a friend to quite a few, nor developing a positive social behavior similar to [[Red Skelton]].}}

The evil [[Count Graduon]]'s name was derived from Chris's feelings about his graduation.<ref>[[Jackie Chat 7]]</ref>

==Lingering attachments==
Generally speaking, Chris's memories of high school still hold great significance for him. This is unsurprising, given that high school was the last time he regularly got out and about in a social environment that seems to have at least partially accepted and tolerated him, though this was most likely because snapping at an [[autistic]] child in a public school can get you suspended.

Chris has mentioned that he frequently [[dreams]] of his days in high school, recalling his teenage years in a nostalgic tone. A [[100 2178|May 2010 YouTube video]] features a flood of wistful reminiscing from Chris, as he laments having to move away from the suburb where he went to high school: "I had so many friends over there, in high school. And I was just sad to leave, when I, after I graduated." A good half a dozen of the women he recalled in his archive of "[[Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts (CWCipedia page)|gal-pals and past sweethearts]]" (and most of the ones who weren't trolls) were girls he knew in high school.

There's also the matter of the aforementioned Count Graduon, where Chris may have created an embodiment of the concept of leaving high school to be the dominant villain of the entire Sonichu saga.

==Reunion plans==
{{quote|I know it was Promised, because at the end of the slideshow they had at the Prom, it had a HUGE Message stating, "See You at the Reunion in Ten Year." I am no longer going to take the insubordination and belaboring-to-no-promise-keeping sitting down anymore.|Chris on his "Promised Reunion"<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 9]]</ref>}}

In his "Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts" page from the [[CWCipedia]], Chris notes that he looks forward to attending his class reunion. He doesn't know exactly when this will take place, and made no effort to find out about it until mid-2010, as he assumed somebody from the school would have contacted him with directions by then.

On 27 [[August 2010]], Chris uploaded a [[EXCLUSIVE Manchester High School 2000 Reunion Required NOW|video address]] to [[YouTube]], wherein he reveals that, up to that point, he hadn't heard anything about a coming reunion. He decided to organize one himself, only to give up relatively quickly. In [[November 2010]], there may have been a class reunion, but either way, Chris did not attend.

==Gallery==
<center><gallery>
Image:481-TungstenPoster.JPG|Tungsten. That is all.
Image:0232-CWCNote3.jpg|Becoming B-ball manager
Image:0309-CWCNote5.jpg|Prom Note
Image:0509-CWCNote8.jpg|Classes
Image:0566-GraduationNote1.jpg|Graduation Note 1
Image:0567-GraduationNote2.jpg|Graduation Note 2
Image:0568-GraduationNote3.jpg|Graduation Note 3
</gallery></center>

== Sources ==
<references />

==See also==
*[[Count Graduon]]
*[[Piedmont Virginia Community College]]
*[[The High School Story]]
*[[Honor roll]]

==External links==
*[http://mychesterfieldschools.com/schools/high-school/manchester/ Homepage]
*[[Wikipedia:Manchester High School (Virginia)|Wikipedia article on Manchester High School]]

{{Places}}

[[Category:Places]]
[[Category:Education]]

Sammy

2013-08-08T00:46:49Z

Croatchu:

{{quote|Hmm...I feel as silly as the time I temporary gained weight, Became stupid, and went to watch [[television]] at [[Ghostbusters|ghost command]].|Chris, confusing his [[obesity]] and idiocy as being in the past tense.}}

[[Image:sammyandchris.jpg|thumb|250px|Chris (left) conversing with his svelte, slim-'n'-trim comic book counterpart (right)]]

'''Sammy''' is a character that [[Chris]] created for a [[Ghostbusters]] [[Sonichu 7#The Family Guy .22Skitch.22|"skitch"]] in [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]] that is blatantly based on [[Wikipedia:Peter Griffin|Peter Griffin]], lead character of the animated series ''[[Family Guy]]''.

The "skitch" consisted of Sammy wanting to use the bathroom, only to find it occupied. He then confuses the transformation booth as another toilet, when suddenly he is [[Random-access humor|hilariously]] thrown around a large spooky area that changed his clothing into the ''[[Ghostbusters]]'' uniform, before finally [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|defecating]] in an early 20th century vehicle that can talk and feel pain.

Chris promised Sammy could return in another issue, if needed in another sketch and also let him keep his clothes, which miraculously, due to their incredible elasticity, fit him perfectly.<ref>[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_7/Page_15]</ref>

Ironically, Sammy's physical appearance and personality resemble Chris in real life far more than [[Christian Weston Chandler (character)|how Chris portrays himself]] in his [[comics]] (where he appears more slender), due to Sammy's massive girth and sheer retardedness. Sammy is also depicted wearing [[Pedo-Glasses|glasses]] (something Chris has shown pride in doing) but the regular comic version of Chris is not. His appearance even ends with Sammy [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|shitting himself]]. Could Sammy in fact be a Freudian "Mary Sue" for Chris? {{clear}}

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:Notthebathroom.jpg|This is hugely insensitive to overweight people.
Image:Peter Weston Griffen.JPG|Chris... Sammy... [[Family Guy|Peter]]...? Erm.
Image:Chrisvssammy.jpg|Whoa.
Image:764px-ExcuseMe.JPG|Rule 34'd
</gallery>
</center>

==References==
<references />

==See also==
{{Fan art}}
*[[Christian Weston Chandler]]
*[[Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)]]
*[[Kudos to the Encyclopedia DramaDestruction]]

{{Sonichu}}

[[Category:Characters]]
[[Category:Chris's alter egos]]

The Wallflower

2013-08-01T01:56:11Z

Croatchu: Misc punctuation, times

:''For the CWCipedia page, see [[Damien Antaria (CWCipedia Page)]]. For usage of her name on the [[CWCki]], see [[CWCki:The Wallflower|The Wallflower (policy)]]''
{| class="infobox" style="width: 21em; font-size: 90%;"
|-
! colspan="2" | Sweethearts
|-
| colspan="2" | [[File:Aliteralallflower.jpg|200px]]
|-
! colspan="2" |The Wallflower
|-
| '''Name'''
| '''[REDACTED]'''
|-
| '''Alias'''
| The Wallflower Damian Antaria
|-
| '''Gender'''
| [[Sweetheart|Female]]
|-
| '''Nationality'''
| [[United States of America|American]]
|-
| '''Race'''
| [[Chris and race|White]]
|}

{{quote|And, who cares if you're a fucking acoustic virgin? ... Not even a cheap whore would want your small dick inside her, neither would I.|The Wallflower, [[Wallflower E-mails 3|speaking for women everywhere,]] as well as inadvertently predicting how Chris would eventually lose his virginity.}}

'''"The Wallflower"''', a.k.a. '''Damian Antaria''', is the heir to [[Megan Schroeder]], a [[gal pal|female friend]] that [[Chris]] met some time around early [[2010]]. She is one of the few girls Chris has managed to associate with in his post-[[high school]] years who is not (as far as can be seen) a direct result of trolling. In [[March 2010]], she joined the long list of would-be [[sweetheart]]s with whom Chris failed to lose his hated virginity.

The Wallflower wanted the relationship over after a [[troll]] linked The Wallflower to the [[CWCki]]. The ending of their relationship is most likely a result of having her details leaked over the [[Internet]] and Chris exacerbating the problem. Nevertheless, Chris has taken it upon himself to blame those goddamn trolls for destroying yet another chance at getting some [[china]].

==The "Relationship"==
{{quote|It was getting deep. We hung out at her house in her room; it was comfy. No sex or mouth-to-mouth.|Chris [[Jackie Chat 1|explains the deepness]] of his relationship with The Wallflower.}}
{{See also|Wallflower E-mails}}
Exactly when Chris first met her is not clear, though it was through a "Young Adult Social Group". While he usually jumps at the chance to advertise his involvement with some of his other women friends to the world, he initially made only oblique, passing references to this one.

[[File:ClydeandLovelyweather.jpg|thumb|The Wallflower on her [[third date]] with [[Clyde Cash]].]]

The first signs of Chris's involvement with The Wallflower showed up in late [[January 2010]]. In [[Mailbag 46#Two hip wallflowers|Mailbag #46]], answered on 26 January, Chris claimed to have joined a "Young Adult Social Group" and "met a lovely woman there who likes me too; we are hitting it off like two hip wallflowers." The Wallflower was sent to the Youth Adult Social Group at the advice of her mother. Around the same time, in [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 3|Alec Benson Leary Phone Call #3]] (which took place on 30 January), Chris said he was expecting a phone call that may have been from her.

In the 14 [[February 2010]] edition of the [[CWC Blog#February 2010|CWC Blog]], Chris declared that "currently, my girl friend and I are getting along great; the relationship is progressing. I only ask for y'all to leave me with my relationship, and not make me feel intruded by inquiring constantly." When a correspondent in [[Mailbag 56#On appreciating tone (also the end)|Mailbag #56]] challenged Chris to prove the existence of his new "girl friend", Chris replied "She does exist, and I do not appreciate your tone at all."

The relationship was, at best, "just friends." Chris himself has confirmed this in [[Sonichu_Forum#News Flash: Chris is still single IRL|one of his posts on the Sonichu Forum]] and again in a [[Jackie Chat 1|private chat]] with [[Jackie]]. Chris's angry remarks on the subject of the "friend zone" in the [[Common Questions#15_January_2010|15 January 2010]] edition of the Mailbag most likely stems from [[Wallflower E-mails|The Wallflower rejecting any romantic advances]].

In [[Vivian Gee E-mails 2|a series of e-mails to Vivian]], it was revealed that Chris had been seeing The Wallflower for a while, treating her as his girlfriend in almost the same manner he had treated Megan. He had taken her out on a date and had plans for a second. He even admitted to attempting to talk her into taking his [[virgin with rage|virginity]] on or before his birthday, and had planned to pay for a prostitute if she did not.

Even with all evidence to the contrary, in his [[03212010 C-Ya Later.MOV|"C-Ya Later" video]], he unabashedly [[Chris and Reality|refers to her as his]] [[Boyfriend-free girl|"girlfriend"]], despite outright stating earlier that she had refused all his advances.

A series of [[Wallflower E-mails|e-mails]] revealed by [[Surfshack Tito]] reveals that Chris's attachment to The Wallflower had been a one-sided relationship to Chris as The Wallflower, indeed, had no intention of being with Chris and was shocked and appalled at the fact that Chris even ''thought'' that she was his sweetheart.

==The "Break-up"==
{{quote|Got-Dang Asexual Woman!|Chris in his [[CWCipedia]] page on The Wallflower.}}

[[File:The link.jpg|thumb|How to troll both Chris and his trolls in one simple step.]]

When Chris released a ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]'' level that revealed The Wallflower's identity, one troll decided to link her to the CWCki.

On 10 March 2010, Chris released [[A message to the Trolls|a message to the trolls]]. Emotionally distraught, he speaks in vague terms about troll interference in his life, and of the pains of a broken heart. At the same time, in a [[Cwc blog|Captain's Log]] entry on the CWCipedia, Chris mentioned "BREAK-UPS FROM BEING EVEN SIMPLY FRIENDS WITH ME," which presumably refers to her cutting off all contact with him.

In the wee hours of 11 March 2010, Chris released [[Don't Mess With Me|a second video]], in which he acted out a theoretical meeting between him and an imaginary [[Clyde Cash]] that ended with Chris slitting an invisible Clyde Cash's throat. Going by that, it's likely that Chris initially blamed the loss of The Wallflower on his old nemesis.

However, on 14 March 2010, Chris uploaded a new video and shifted the blame to another troll, [[Surfshack Tito]]. In between delivering [[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!|bizarre threats of violence]], Chris makes a resolution to "regain the love and trust and friendship" of his gal pal. It is not clear why Chris believes he can accomplish this goal by donning a kilt, waving around a small knife, putting on a grotesque attempt at a Scottish accent, and generally presenting a hideous affront to the culture and people of an entire nation.

Later that same day, Chris made [["Damian Antaria", PLEASE, Don't Leave Me - I NEED YOU!!!|another video]] where he again referred to The Wallflower by her pen name, and literally begged her to sleep with him because his life was so hard, and otherwise he would have to pay $100 for sex with a hooker.

In the [[Surfshack Tito E-mails]], leaked four days later, Chris was mocked by Tito claiming to have had sex with The Wallflower. While Chris was initially incredulous, in a [[Chris Drops the N-Bomb|later video]] he expressed outrage at Tito for "taking her from [him]," as Wallflower had recently begun to back up his claims.

The [[Wallflower E-mails 3|third set of e-mails to The Wallflower]] finally confirms what had happened. As seen, The Wallflower was outright shocked at the vastness of information on her page within the [[CWCki]], assumed that Chris had set the page up himself, and ended their friendship. Chris, however, kept trying to salvage their relationship long after it became obvious that he didn't have a chance, angering her even more. She also asserted her hatred of Chris by first saying that Tito was indeed her boyfriend before giving up and just telling him that she was asexual.

==Today==
It seems that, years since the events of that March morning, Chris has yet to forget her as, [[Calling Out|returning to the Internet]], he [[Calling Out "Tito" - Don|calls out Tito]] and demands that he apologize to her for breaking them up, still referring to her as his "girlfriend". However, a few days later, Chris made [[Correction of EX relationship status|a retraction video]], apparently clarifying that they were indeed just friends. The description of the video seems to suggest that she found out about the video and demanded he correct it.

Interestingly, though he hasn't forgotten about her, he hasn't "forgiven her" for it.

==Anonymity==
Originally, this article intruded into parts of The Wallflower's life that had nothing to do with Chris, prompting her to request that the article be reworked to refer to her under a pseudonym and avoid direct references to her personal life and identity. The CWCki's administrators reasonably agreed.

Chris is convinced that this change took place because of the angry threats he made in his video of 10 March 2010 (roughly around the time the edits were made), when in fact it had nothing to do with him. The changes to this page led him to believe that he could insist on sweeping edits to many other pages, which he listed in the [[CWC Blog#14 March 2010|14 March 2010 Captain's Log update]] on the CWCipedia. Those demands were ignored.

The e-mails from The Wallflower seem to paint a fuller picture to this. It appears that when The Wallflower discovered her page on the CWCki, she got pissed at Chris and demanded that he remove that information. However, he did it through his [[YouTube]] videos. Annoyed, she went to the CWCki herself.

Chris, in the meantime, continued to drop her first name and pen name in his videos, including [["Damian Antaria", PLEASE, Don't Leave Me - I NEED YOU!!!|one]] which had it in the title.

Chris later also uploaded [[Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts (CWCipedia page)|a list of his former gal-pals and sweethearts]] on the CWCipedia which included her full name. Chris goes on to blame the existence of her [[Facebook]] page for the leak of her identity and the end of their budding relationship.

Continuing with this theme, 19 [[April 2010]] would see Chris adding an [[Damien Antaria (CWCipedia Page)|''entire article'']] about her to the CWCipedia. In addition to the usual fits of megalomania and delirium, the page sported a copy-pasted version of this page. Conspicuously absent, however, was this very section.

To this day, he believes the entire debacle was the Wallflower's fault for having a Facebook page for trolls to discover. [[Calling Out|Recently]], though, Chris has seen fit to ''partially'' [[Chris and remorse|accept blame]] for what happened.

==See also==
*[[Wallflower E-mails]]
*[[Wallflower E-mails 2|Wallflower E-mails II]]
*[[Wallflower E-mails 3|Wallflower E-mails III]]

{{DEFAULTSORT:Wallflower}}
{{People}}
{{Love quest}}
[[Category:Surfshack Tito Saga]]

Chris Drops the N-Bomb

2013-08-01T01:48:30Z

Croatchu:

[[File:Niggo.jpg|thumb|right|250px|"Oh yeah, he's also Old Fashioned."]]

'''Chris Drops the N-Bomb''' (officially posted as '''100_2151.MOV''') is a video uploaded on 17 March 2010, where [[Chris]] sends yet another gory [[death threat]], and uses the dreaded 'N-Word', at [[Surfshack Tito (troll)|Surfshack Tito]]. It is also believed that this video was the reason that Jack Thaddeus pulled all of his funding from CWCipedia.

Unsurprisingly, Chris once again drops the name of the [[Wallflower]]. His actual explicit and complete usage of a racial slur, though, was unexpected; the closest he had previously come was singing "Don't Trust them Niggas over there" to [[Julie]] and when [[BlueSpike]] coerced him into saying it during their [[Julie Reveals Herself|final conversation]], where it took Chris several tries to get the word out (the best he could manage on his first attempt was "[[Niggo]]").

It's well-known that Chris harbors racist feelings (based on reports of his behavior at [[The Game Place]], among other things), but they're not usually expressed so bluntly. The release of the [[Surfshack Tito E-mails]] on 18 March 2010, however, revealed that Chris has apparently grown quite fond of using the word as an insult.

To make matters worse, there hasn't been any indication that Surfshack Tito is actually black, or that Chris has any reason for thinking so. Tito's cartoon namesake is a Pacific islander, not ethnically African in any way, and Tito the troll bills himself as Hawaiʻian.

{{clear}}

==Video==

{{Tardrage}}

{{Infobox/video
| name = 100_2151.MOV
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ICmPmA99AgM}}
| stardate = 17 [[March 2010]]
| subject = {{Racism|text}}, {{Violence|text}}
| style = {{Rage|text}}
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}
| shirt = {{TanWideLines|text}}
| previous = [[Happy Sonichu Day]]
| next = [[03212010 C-Ya Later.MOV]]
}}

{{quote|You God damn womanizing raping... trollin' stupid pickle suited... nigger!}}

=== Transcript ===

Tito! You stay away from [Wallflower], you son of a bitch. You have no right taking her from me like that, you [[Chris and sex#Chris and rape|womanizing rapist]]! And if you go near her again, then I ''will'' find you! I will find you, I will [[Pocket knife|cut you up]], I will [[CWC Fighter|beat you up]], I will knock you on your backside, [[Chris and reality|stand on your gut like a log roller, and roll your fat right through your skull! Blowin' it wide open!]]

Because that's what you deserve, you God damn [[Chris and hypocrisy|womanizing raping]]... trollin' stupid [[Man in the Pickle Suit|pickle suited]]...

{{rageQuote|NIGGER!}}

And don't you ever, don't you dare contact me in my [[Surfshack Tito E-mails|E-mail]] again, or contact me ever! You stay away from me- You stay away from me and contact. Don't call me... I ''will'' find ''you''! [''Shows middle finger'']

==Fan videos==

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = YOU...YOU...DOUBLE
| video = {{#ev:youtube|yaJwLL5mfg0}}
| stardate = 18 [[March 2010]]
| maker = [[Vivian Gee]]
| subject =
| type = Remix
| info = [http://www.mediafire.com/?qnnxdz3im5d MP3] [http://db.tt/B470zLjr Mirror]
}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Happy Sonichu Day]]|nextlink=[[03212010 C-Ya Later.MOV]]|}}

{{Troll Videos}}
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, March 2010| 2010-03-17]]
[[Category:Surfshack Tito Saga videos| 2010-03-17]]

Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia

2013-07-30T23:20:09Z

Croatchu:

{{Articleofthenow}}
'''Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia''' is a defunct forum that was established in late [[April 2011]] and ceased to exist later that year<ref>http://www.forumer.com/forum-error.php?u=tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com</ref>. [[Chris]] was posting as himself under the alias "Kookydashy". This resulted in several stories of his exploits as a [[tomgirl]] that, to say the least, made the effort of tracking him down more than worth it. Chris posted on and off, trying his best to conceal his identity in the most obvious way possible. Below are his T&ToV posts, with blue representing Chris' posts and red representing posts in the threads he was responding to.

== Posts ==
===Re: Introductions!===
In which Chris openly announces he is Christian Weston Chandler as much as he can without actually saying it.

[[Image:ponyboy.jpg|thumb|[[My Little Pony|Kookydashy]]: Interests include [[Plush Breasts of Fail|breasts]], [[China|pussy]], and [[Autism Awareness E-mails|autism awareness]].]]

{{quotebox|Hello, fellow tomgirls. :)

Y'all may address me by my screen name in the board talk. I like [[Chris and Music|music]], [[Kaka Makeup Basics|makeup]], [[Chris and Fashion|dressin' up]] in my mini, [[Mass Debating|havin' fun]] 'n hangin' with my [[Gal-pals|girlfriend]]s, [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys|karaoke]], [[video games]], crafting and [[art]].

I am also empathetic, so [[Autism|I can understand others people's feelings]], as well as my own. I am a dynamic, complex individual.

I do not have many [[jerks|dude pals]], because I have my own mental hang-ups against the majority of them; Nothing Personal. I have a history of being bullied by some mean brutes, as well as [[homos|homosexuals]], over the [[internet]]. Cyber-Bullies/[[Trolls]]/Anons are a hot button with me. I prefer not to discuss that issue further.

And I am an all-around good, [[death threats|friendly]], [[List of Chris's lies|honest]], [[Vibrator|heterosexual]] tomgirl.

Thank you all for offering me respect, as I respect each of you and your opinions on the board.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=2&p=157#p157]</ref>}}

===Re: Coming out to my parents===
In this thread, Chris opened up about his parents' feelings in regards to his newfound fetish.

{{quotebox|Y'all are singin' my song; my [[Barb|mom]] and [[Bob|dad]] were shocked bad when I told them I was a tomgirl. Soo Literally old-fasioned (they're both [[Chris and English|seinors]]). My mom said "I didn't raise a daughter", and my father threw the damned "fag" card at me.

I will Always be Straight, Mom and Dad; give me some faith and trust.

What a world with outside influances to put great paranoia in our families.

Also, try looking up "tomgirl" on [[Wikipedia]]; it redirects to "effeminancy". While effeminancy is true for us, I feel the contents of that page is against us, due to it addressing the [[homos]].

Someone needs to undo the redirects, edit the grammer errors in "tomgirl"`s original edit, and add a ton more detail to it.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=3&p=160#p160]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|My mom is still giving me complaints and nit-picks about me wearing my feminine attire. I wish I could just up and move out and not have to deal with my family; I don't know too many other people here in C-Ville, and those I do know I'm only acquainted with or know little about them for only a few weeks.

Plus finding employment is hard. I got a [[CADD|fancy computer degree]] from [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|community college]], and there have been very slim pickings from it. Already Taken; Quota's Filled; yada, yada, yada.

Plus also, she keeps throwing disbelief towards us by stating "Tomgirls aren't real"; SHE'S a Tomboy; what a bunch of 1940's old-fashioned crap. Plus she watches too much current news, and she is soo paranoid and shit.

I wish I could afford to move out, but I can't afford it [[monthly tugboat|financially]], [[Autism|mentally]] and [[Chris and anger|emotionally]]. Fucking [[stress|pisses me off.]]<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=3&start=20]</ref>}}

===Re: Girly Things Tee Hee===

{{quotebox|After I realized my tomgirly ways, and starting dressing up in my skirts, I started feeling discomfort in using the Men's restroom. I asked my closest [[gal pal]] if it would be going too far in using the Ladies' room; she told me to go with my feelings. My next skirted outting, I used the ladies' room, and I squatted, holding my [[duck|arrow]] down over the john (so I would be less likely to soil my skirt); it felt good and Right. Days later, though, after 4 more lady trips; a woman complains and tattles on me, and a stereotypical [[jerk|Brute male]] shouts me out. I felt embarassed. When in skirt, I am still gonna go to the Ladies, because there is no goin' back for me.

[[Rape|Heck, I would not hold it against a tomboy who felt more comfort in using the Men's room over the Ladies']].

As truest Tomgirls, we do respect greatly the women as equals. [[lie|I would never look]] or anything of the sort.

Open for your thoughts.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=20&p=162#p162]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|I've recently got into the original Squinkies, they are so cute and cool. And their gumball-machine dispensing playsets are neat. I like the cupcake-shaped one. And they're also coming out with Squinkie cars for Hot Wheels and Cars 2; little Squinkie people now have cool wheels to drive.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=20&start=10]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|Something else girly I enjoy danglin' around where I go is my ankle bracelet. It's a silver chain with sections of 4 silver beads, and I've added three stars on chains onto the hook. I never take it off, because it is an awesome and cute jewelry, plus it is difficult to put it back on. LOL

I also am enjoying the "Mighty Milky Way" DSiWare game on my [[Nintendo|3DS]]. Luna is a cute, sexy gal, and the method of guiding her from planet to planet is neat.

Anyone else on here with a 3DS may add me onto y'all's Friend List with my code, 2836-0121-9073. Please P.M. me with your 3DS F.C. in response if y'all add me.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=20&p=382#p382]</ref>}}

===Re: Homosexuals===
[[Image:TG20.jpg|thumb|Hear that, homos? Chris is offended by your flamboyance!]]
{{quotebox|I do not care much for the [[homosexual]] males either. I mean, I really feel offended when they get soo flamboyant with their ways and such, it's like they're shoving it in your face. Plus, most of the Cyber-Bullies who gave me grief were homos [[Jack Thaddeus|themselves]], placing their damn label onto me wrongfully.

[[Magi-Chan|As long as they each keep it to themselves and behind closed doors, I won't bother them]].<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=20&p=162#p162]</ref>}}

===Re: July Meetup===

{{quoteboxred|'''by DanielleTheRiveter » Sun May 29, 2011 9:58 pm'''

That's right, everyone. It's that time again. Time to plan our big meet up for July. We're currently looking to meet up somewhere that's kinda central and should be easy for everyone.

First off, remember to dress your best. I'm going to wear my old dress uniform like normal but if you'd like to give us a sneak peak of your outfit, please feel free to do so here.

Also, any suggestions for Date / Time / Location is welcome.

Looking forward to seeing everyone there!|DanielleTheRiveter<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=27&p=229#p229]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|How about at the [[Two's_company_snapshots|Applebees]] next to Toys 'R' Us on Branchlands Lane on a Monday; at 9 PM, they have Karaokee night there. Meet and greet first and sing-along after.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=27&p=229#p229]</ref>}}

===Re: FUKKEN HATERSSSssssssssss===
In which Chris fantasizes about an unrealistic encounter with a "hater", then throws in some unintelligible [[Random-access humor|RAH]].

{{quotebox|I would generally ignore the haters' hurtful comments and move forward too. But if they are really in my face calling me gay or telling me [[virgin|I won't be geeting a woman]], I would tell them like it is in my miniskirt, "All I have to do is lift up my skirt and I'll be up your woman's biz in seconds." :)<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=32&p=291#p291]</ref>}}

===Re: What part of Virginia are you from?===

{{quotebox|Charlottesville is my city of stompin' ground; it can stand some improvement, though. More excitement, and maybe a strip club or two. LOL.

I've also resided in Midlothian for my Middle and [[High School]] years.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=35&p=292#p292]</ref>}}

===Re: 10 interesting facts about you!===
Unsurprisingly the most bland, useless information is considered by Chris to be an "interesting fact"

{{quotebox|[[Autism|1.]] I like to take my time to think of how I feel about the current topic, as well as responding in discussion.

[[Lie|2.]] I am empathetic.

[[Fat|3.]] I appreciate how the fast food places wised up and started offering apple slices as a healthier option after decades of fried potatoes.

[[Trolls|4.]] With my history of being trolled and online coomunicating, I feel online socializing only makes people more autistic-like. People need to wise up and go back to feeling comfortable socializing in person.

[[Cwcsicle|5.]] I have sassy, fun ideas sometimes.

[[Sonichu|6.]] I am good at hand-drawing, coloring and story creating.

[[Manchester High School|7.]] I have had happy years in High School.

[[Autism|8.]] I try to be cautious of other people's intentions and feelings while communicating and coping with them.

[[Lie|9.]] I am technologically and musically inclined.

[[Chris and Art|10.]] I enjoy tinkering and creating when I feel inspired.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=34&p=293#p293]</ref>}}

===Re: tomboy looking 4 tomgirl===
[[Image:Suchin.jpg|thumb|Suchin]]

{{quoteboxred|'''by William » Sun May 29, 2011 2:44 am'''

hello my name is suchin and i am originally from thailand. my friends call me william or will because i am rowdy and like to have fun i am looking for tomgirl to treat me right. i work in manicure salon now and i love beauty on my men and dirt on me

[image]

this is me. what is you? lets meet up and exchange details. i am from richmond but will be in charlottesville for the 4th of july. i love freedom now too.
your turn now! fi dorrar. sacki aur bunti. PLEASE send me a message!|William<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|There is a pretty face, lovely head of [[hair]] and [[Women's Rights|a nice rack]] in the photo. But I feel I have to interject here.

How do we know you are really that woman, or are you really some immature, trolling stupid brat trying to stir trouble on our forum? People have done that sort of thing over the internet; I fell victim to communicating with such people. And from that, I have learned to keep most personal things offline and to myself.

Anyway, I am not going to fall for such an obvious facade, and I wish to prevent anyone else from finding such gross disappointment and disaster.

Fess up, man.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Thu Jun 09, 2011 3:27 am '''

Hey I'm going to be down in Richmond tomorrow anyway, I think you're pretty cute so I'd like to meet up if possible.

I understand if this is kind of sudden, but when I saw that picture I just knew I had to meet this woman.|Tippy<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by William » Thu Jun 09, 2011 3:33 am'''

kookydashy your comment make me so sad? i work so hard on my body to be my tomboy self and i am so tired of others putting me down for me being me. sometimes i think it because they jealous but for you to accuse me of being troll, someting i hate most in whole american world, make me cry some. this remind me of my sister telling me i cannot wear pants because i am woman. i can wear pants AND NOT BE MAN OR UGLY!!!!

as for Tippy, you sound so nice. I would love to meet a creature like you in reality world! i would even love to do your hair and nails and so much more... I am excite now! Yes! Please! I get out of work at around six. Can we do drinkies than??
|William<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Thu Jun 09, 2011 3:38 am'''

OMG that's perfect, I'm supposed to have an early dinner meeting with a supplier, so I will be free right around six. I'll private message you my cell number and other info so we can exchange our numbers and stuff. I am so excited, I cannot wait. I will be counting down the hours till we meet up my Tomboy dream. We'll have drinks, and maybe dessert ;). Hehehehe|Tippy<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by William » Thu Jun 09, 2011 3:44 am'''

AHHHHHHHHHH!!!! Sawatdee kaa!! <3 You are true lady AND gentleman! I will call you tonight to confirm our time together with one another for tomorrow! You have dried every tear of mine so quick and make me smile bright bright bright... I cannot wait to smile more with you! xx|William<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

[[Image:Suchin 2.jpg|thumb|Suchin]]

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Fri Jun 10, 2011 6:00 pm'''

Hey everyone, I have a major update.

So after my meeting with the supplier, who I sweet talked into giving me a discounted rate, I met up with Suchin for drinks. Let me just say Tomboys and Tomgirls, the photos do not do her justice, she looks absolutely incredible. She gave me some great tips on keeping my pedicures lasting longer, we talked about every subject imaginable, and I hope she doesn't mind me saying this, but I am totally crushing on her right now, and cannot wait to see her again. The drive home from Richmond felt like nothing because of how happy I am right now.

Plus I'll always have this picture to remember our incredible night by.

Tippy<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by William » Fri Jun 10, 2011 7:33 pm'''

Yes, it very true ! Tippy you steal my heart and not ever let go! I am happy this way. I love sharing all my pretty lingerie with Tippy and I teach my new Tomgirl how to do Thai lap dance. We are so sensual and one. Tippy and I are item now!! NO TOUCHING! Thank you TBS and TGS of Virgina! <3 xoxo|William<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Fri Jun 10, 2011 7:40 pm'''

Suchin, you catty gal, I thought you were gonna let me announce to the forum that we were an item. It's ok, I still love you. And I can't wait until the next time we're together so I can give you that massage while you play your video games. I've never felt this happy, like this may be the greatest day of my entire life. I've met a lot of girls in my life, but Suchin, you are my woman, my strong, masculine, tomboy woman. I can't wait to see you next weekend, I've already talked to my boss, and I'm getting Friday off so we can spend the whole day together.

I never thought I'd be able to find love on an internet forum, and here we are, happy as can be. Thank you Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virgina, I hope the rest of you find your Tomboys and Tomgirls soon.
|Tippy<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|It looks like I stand corrected of my suspicions. But with my past experiences, and the too great number of crazy people in the world, we all have to be very cautious. And with that, I apologize for my earlier post and hurting your feelings, Suchin.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

===Re: Manicure/Pedicure stories?===
{{quotebox|I have colored my nails before, and it is fun to do for a grand outting.

I feel it ill for me to go in for a manicure, not only due to lack of funds, but I am a recovering nail-biter. I even had to have a fingernail replaced in surgery years ago; it is growing in well, even though slower than the other nine.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=37&p=312#p312]</ref>}}

===Re: Mothers===
{{quotebox|My mother has tried to coerce me into going back to [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|briefs]]; Hells No! Panties are far more comfortable And stylish. And I am not going to ever go out without one of my [[muscle bra|sports bras]] again. She even tried to bribe, or wager, me, but I would not take it.

I feel there should be a law requiring all men to wear bras (sports ones at least); I feel grossed out whenever I see some dude walking sround shirtless. ]:(P<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=7&t=39&p=315#p315]</ref>}}

===Re: Friendship Issues===
{{quotebox|I'd like to talk a bit about those of us (well, me in particular) who have for real only less than or equal to a handful of friends in person.

Growing up, I have had mostly [[gal-pals|female friends]]. I was considerably blessed, yet I still lack the virgin-breaker moment. The close friendships were great, and I really appreciated them in my heart forever. I really should have tried to get further, but before 21, I was [[naive]] on the subject of dating. There Really should be a manditory [[dating education]] class alongside sex ed.

I have known all of my life that I do get along better with women well over those of my own gender. No personal offense to anyone.

I have a mental flaw, along with other learnings, which has taught me that most of the worldwide male poulation are, pretty much, Uncaring, Violent, Ignorant, Dumb, Boring Jerks. And with that, I feel afraid in meeting most males, because I feel ill of getting too close, because of me getting hurt, or something else god-awful. ]:(

Again, no personal offense is meant to anyone.

My gal pal has informed me that me meeting more women and getting it on is very unlikely if I do not have many dude pals. Nutshell; I would be mistaken for a homo, or too easily [[friend zone|friend-zoned]] by women. This tid bit makes me feel sad.

Open for individual responses from Everyone on this forum.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by BornThisWay » Sun Jun 19, 2011 12:24 am'''

Aww, that sux!!!! Anyway I met most of my friends back in high school, or college, or at my past jobs. Sometimes it's hard to keep in touch with everybody but that's why the [[Internet]] and phones were invented! A lot of the friends I hang out with now were from my last job. We'd go out for drinks every Thursday, Friday and Saturday and have the grandest of times! Sometimes I still meet up with them, but not every week like I used to.

As for meeting people, I've never really thought about it because I'm not a really shy person. I guess if you strike up conversations based on stuff you like or stuff you notice about them, that's a good start. It's real easy to sit in your room all day and play video games but you just have to talk to people and get out there. Sometimes I'll just go out all by myself and sit someplace nice and quiet and read. If you look cute sometimes people come up and introduce themselves!

But anyway if you haven't done it already you should get on [[Facebook]] and try to find your old friends and tell them what you've been up to since you've last seen them! It's a really easy way to keep in touch with people especially since a lot of people move away right after high school or college. Facebook is like a high school reunion that never ends! (Sorry if I sound like a commercial!) Plus if there's anyone who still lives in Virginia maybe they can introduce you to some of their single friends! Just be yourself and let us know what they say, ok?|BornThisWay<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|"Social" websites like Facebook and [[MySpace]] are ALL a Joke against socializing. Everybody is on the internet these days. And to Socialize online with total strangers Constantly is an epic fail. That kind of "socializing" on the internet will only result in making people more and more Autistic-Like. Think about it.

The more time we spend in front of an internet screen leads to constant lack of practice in REAL Socializing face to face offline.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Mike Love » Tue Jun 21, 2011 5:23 am'''

I like Facebook. There's a lot of people I don't nescesarilly talk to a lot, but I like to be able to keep up with what they're doing. Plus it makes it easier to keep track of people's phone numbers. Plus, I know a lot of cute girls, and I like to look at their photos a lot and get ideas on new outfits to wear.
|Mike Love<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|Just a gosh-darn minute. People Pretend to be Other People online, even Computers have been Programmed to pretend to be People to tease and get personal information from you. And Trolls/Cyber-Bullies Hack into YOUR Facebook and MySpace, rearranging, smearing, soiling with pornographic, most horrible images from the darkest regions of the internet. And they create [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|wiki]] [[CWCki|sites]] and pages of Hate against you soo horrible that Googling your own name results in MILLIONS of hate-filled results.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by BornThisWay » Tue Jun 21, 2011 11:53 pm'''

Like I said, it's really, really sad that you're putting your fears in the way of getting in touch with your old friends and establishing new friendships. I'll bet your old friends think about you sometimes and miss you. And like it or not, people use social networking sites to contact people they know in real life to do things in real life. This is the way things are now.

I don't get how somebody who has enough courage to dress up in women's clothing and walk around in public and use the girl's bathroom can be so afraid of somebody making fun of them on the internet. I mean, who would even know who your old friends are? Why would somebody go through the trouble of impersonating them? And wouldn't you like, be able to figure out if it was somebody pretending to be them? I mean their Facebook profile would link back to all their friends and most of their family members. They'd not only have to fool you, but their parents and relatives, who have known them since they were born. Like, if somebody tried to set up a phony profile and pretended to be me just to hate on me, everybody would know that something was off.

So like, you've though about one bad thing that could happen if you tried to look up old friends on Facebook, and just assumed that it will happen. And you said you're afraid of getting to close to males in real life, because you think something bad might happen. It's really easy to worry and make up excuses about why you can't do things, but just know that if you do that anxiety is going to rule your life.

Like I said you believe in yourself enough to admit that you're a Tomgirl and get out there and strut your stuff. Some Tomgirls don't even get that far! Think about how much you've already accomplished before deciding what you can and can't do. You're your own boss and I can't make you do anything, I'm just saying your life would be a lot less lonely if you were open to looking up the old friends you've fallen out of touch with over the years.|BornThisWay<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Wed Jun 22, 2011 1:31 am'''

Maybe I've just been lucky and haven't met anyone who has lied to me online. I use facebook to keep in contact with the people I'm close to, they've made it so easy to keep track of my friends, why wouldn't I take advantage of it. As far as having problems with meeting anyone online. I met Suchin here on the forum, and I had no trouble meeting up with her. There are always going to be assholes out there Kooky, but you can show them that they are just haters and you aren't going to listen to them.
|Tippy<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Thoria » Wed Jun 22, 2011 2:34 am'''
I just use FB in private mode, that way haters can't see what I'm doing and I only have my closest friends on there.
|Thoria<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

At this point Chris loses all self-control and does everything short of posting "I am Christian Weston Chandler, I am famous on the internet and trolls pick on me".

{{quotebox|It's not just THOUGHT, but it HAS happened to me before for real. And if you don't believe, take for example the author of the comic book series featuring that yellow, [[electric hedgehog]]... [[Sonichu]], if I remember correctly.

Before a time, the author had a clean history, then Cyber-Bullies and Trolls attacked him greatly; now Googling his name will result in over a million results of hate and name soiling. Especially from the blackmail and deceptions he had to endure.

I, myself, had a page on Facebook. Things were good for me a while. Then I was attacked in [[2005]] by the Trolls. They pretended to be my closest friends; they got a number of incriminating photos and details from me. They also hacked into my Facebook. It took me over a week before I was able to reset my password and e-mail address. And upon reflection, I closed my Facebook account and left the online socializing for years. It is real, and they are vicious, crazy, wickedly smart people.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

===Re: Reputation===
In which Chris actually says "I am Christian Weston Chandler, I am famous on the internet and trolls pick on me". He also tries to incite the forum into hacking CWCki for him.

{{quotebox|This Arthur has a good idea with this "[[wikipedia:Denial-of-service attack|DOS]]". He certainly knows more than I have on taking down their Trolling Stupid websites.

My Tomgirl and Tomboy acquaintances, I feel it is time I introduce myself better. I am more than just a Tomgirl. I am the high-functioning autistic person who was heavily emotionally damaged, artistic inspiration lost with paranoia, deception, blackmail and plain hurtful words from those bottom-feeding Trolls. I am the hand-drawing original creator of Sonichu, Rosechu and the city of Cwcville, Virginia, USA.

I am Christian Weston Chandler of Ruckersville, VA.

I had joined this Forum with the opportunity to associate with my own misunderstood kind of people, commonly mistaken for amongst the gays and lesbians. I concealed my identity on here reasonably, prayfully Not to be found by those Trolls.

For Years, I have fallen victim to their trachery. I have tried within my own limited knowledge and technology to counter-attack those fiends. I have mostly failed. And as a result, my reputation on the internet fell deep into their treacherous exaggerations, lies and crap. If I had any knowledge or technology, I would have hacked into and destroy every one of their webpages, servers and whatnot looong ago, but I did and still do not. All I could do in the end was hide in the old-fashioned (as it would appear to be now) world of Real Life, off of the internet. Yet I am one who does not like to be left behind in the modern world.

Also, because of them, it has been Impossible for me to get a job; damned negative background checks. And I would appreciate reducing the results of my full name from over Two Freaking Million results back down to less than 100.

Now that they have found me on here, y'all have been dragged into my darkness; for that, I feel deep shame and regret, and I am really sorry about that.

I am Not the disgruntled, mean or perverted person they have mislabeled of me; I am only a normal, heterosexual, good natured, high-functioning autistic Tomgirl, and I want to be treated like a normal person.

And I wish I do not have to be paranoid of those fiends and their hurtful webpages.<ref>http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=490#p490</ref>}}

Unaware of the horrible truth, members promise to help.

{{quoteboxred|'''by Thoria » Thu Jul 21, 2011 11:22 pm'''
Well Chris, you won't have to worry about this "CWCki" for much longer. Trust me on that, we'll take care of it. I have a cousin who's into computers and stuff, he took a Computer Science III course. I'll give him a shout and see if he can do something. If I were those trolls I'd be shivering in my boots right now.}}

Chris demonstrates a feeling resembling gratitude, but also seems to be preparing himself to sit down and wait for a solution to come to him.

{{quotebox|Thank you. Any help in this old battle to finally put it to rest would bebgreatly appreciated.

[[Chris and religion|God bless us all]].}}

One of them quickly catches up, however:

{{quoteboxred|'''by SexBomb33 » Sat Jul 23, 2011 2:42 am'''
Aren't you going to help us fight ''your'' battle in any way?}}

Chris explains why:

{{quotebox|As I have said before, I have tried on my own to counter-attack, and I still lack knowledge and resourses within my reach to counter-attack properly. And I do not have a functional Personal Computer or a Laptop of any kind. I have been posting from my 3DS internet browser, and it, my Wii, PS3, PSP at my house and one of the computers at the nearby library, which requires Gasoline to get to, are my current ONLY connection methods to the internet.

At this point, technology-wise and mentally autistic with the missing links in my Corpus Callosum, I do not feel fit to be an adaquate leader in taking down the frigging cyber-bullies and trolls.

I do have intel from my own experiences and past research which hopefully can be helpful. I'd recommend starting at [[The GAMe PLACe|the Game & Hobby Place]] in Charlottesville, across from the Omni hotel. I have been banned from there in April, [[2008]] by the [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|cold-hearted]] [[Michael Snyder]]. My family and I know that in a great way, that Place IS a central or focal point of the Trolls' plottings and/or such.

PLUS, it AND the other three associated hobby stores on their same website are ALL owned by a convicted-in-Illinois sex offender, Robert Lightfire. The Place is located across the street from a Public School; morally and legally, the Place should NOT be located there at all. Yet Mr. Lightburn is listed as an Offender in Illinois; he isn't listed in VA. He lives in Madison. I am positive, aside from him being married, Mr. Snyder has his own equatable criminal scandal.

That's all I have for now.<ref>http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=522#p522</ref>}}

Chris will be helped by TRUE and HONEST people in this fight. As in, they will do it for him if he can help (i.e., never)

{{quoteboxred|'''by DanielleTheRiveter » Fri Jul 29, 2011 1:21 am'''
Don't worry about it, Chris. I'm sure Thoria's cousin can help you out. He's been good to me in the past I'm sure that he's an Honest and Helpful fellow.

I'm sure that you'll be free of those trolls soon and I'm glad that you've trusted us with this. You're a good friend. Thoria's cousin has enough tech ability. He can walk you through it as long as you have the intel and can help him out a little bit.}}

==See also==
*[[Sonichu Girls]]
*[[Tomgirl Pictures]]
*[[Trollin' Train]]

==References==
<references/>

{{The Internet}}

[[Category:Historical Documents]]
[[Category:Homos]]
[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Websites]]

User:Croatchu

2013-07-30T23:00:43Z

Croatchu:

==Me==

{{collapsible|Userboxes|
<center>{{Canuckfag}} {{Croatian}} {{JERK}} {{Armchair Psychologist}} {{GrammarNazi}} {{Observer}} {{Catholic}} {{TheSimpsons}} {{Wii}}
{{Lucy}}
}}

'''Name''': Croatchu

'''Age''': Eons

'''Occupation(s)''': JERK, armchair psychologist, amateur Christorian, grammar Nazi and all-around extraordinary gentleman

'''Achievement(s)''': First openly Croatian CWCki user

{{#ev:youtube|UrgpZ0fUixs}}

Autism papers

2013-07-30T22:43:23Z

Croatchu:

The '''autism papers''' are some of the most valued [[Relics of Fail]], in which the exact nature of [[Chris's]] psychiatric [[Chris and psychology|diagnosis]] is revealed by an objective source (as opposed to Chris's revisionist account of his life), and the extent of his [[autism]] (or whether he really is autistic at all) is explained.

To date, only an intake survey from [[2004]] is available, resulting from Chris's mandated visit to a psychiatrist after flipping out while attending [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|PVCC]]. His original, earlier papers, dating to when Chris was five or six years old, remain locked away in [[Bob Chandler|Bob's]] filing cabinet. Ivy discovered that it is impossible for Chris to recover them himself, as Bob kept the keys on his person at all times. As a result of Bob's death, the keys are presumably in Barbara's possession now. Either way, these autism papers can be considered lost relics of fail, due to Chris' paranoid nature, lack of recent interaction with trolls and the fact that he'd actually have to put effort into finding them.

==Background==
In '''November 2009''', Chris e-mailed [[Kacey]] these papers to show that he is a TRUE and [[HONEST]] autistic. Kacey shared these papers with her new husband, the official and original [[Liquid Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]] who in turn distributed them online. The papers are presented here in their original form, edited only for wiki styling and linking.

A number of passages of this copy have been outlined in yellow highlighting marker. Most of them either describe Chris's search for a [[sweetheart]] or contain some of the evaluator's more favorable judgments of Chris's mental state. A few are passages that confirm the diagnosis of Chris's autism.

To date, this is the only independent, professional evaluation of Chris's condition available.

Several observers have pointed out that these documents seem to paint a surprisingly rosy picture of Chris's behavior and mental state. It helps to keep a few factors in mind, though. One, the survey took place in [[2004]] — at the time, Chris still attended school, went outside on a regular basis, and received at least a modest amount of social interaction. He was likely in better shape than he is after years of isolation and staying indoors for days on end. Two, despite being famous for his wild confrontations with authority, Chris is in fact extremely deferent in the face of authority figures so long as he doesn't think they're a hindrance to him (consider the opening moments of the [[Father Call]]). Three, to the uninitiated, his [[Love Quest]] can come across as rather sweet in an idiotic way, the desperate actions of a socially awkward but basically sincere and harmless person. Finally, and most simply, the survey was based on a fairly brief encounter with Chris. As trolls have learned over the years, he gets much worse with regular exposure.

==Intake Survey==
===Page 1===

[[Image:CWCPsychicEvaluation11052004P1.jpg|thumb|Scan of page 1.]]

<center>'''OUTPATIENT PSYCHIATRIC SERVICES'''</center>
 Department of Psychiatric Medicine
 [[University of Virginia]] Health System

 Northridge Building, Suite 210, P. O. Box 801210
 [[Charlottesville]], Virginia 22908-1210
 (434) 243-4646; Fax (434) 243-4743

 Patient's Name: Christian Chandler
 UVA History #: 003 79 67
 Date of Birth: 02/24/[[1982|82]]
 Date of Intake: 11/05/[[2004|04]]
 [[Wikipedia:Residency (medicine)|Resident Physician]]: Jeff Raynor, M.D., Resident in Psychiatric Medicine
 Attending Physician: Zachariah C. Dameron, III, M.D.

====IDENTIFYING STATEMENT:====

Mr. Chandler is a 22-year-old SWM with a history of [[autism]], who was referred for psychiatric evaluation following his recent suspension from community college.

====HISTORY OF PRESENT ILLNESS:====

Mr. Chandler says that since finishing high school and starting at [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|PVCC]] in the year [[2000]], he has had an [[Love Quest|increasing interest]] in a [[Boyfriend-free girl|female companion]]. His attempts at this ultimately lead to his suspension from college. His attempt took the form of a [[Attraction sign|sign]], which he placed next to himself while sitting in the lobby at Piedmont. The sign was a list of qualifications that a potential girlfriend would have. He said that he has been very frustrated by his inability to find a girlfriend and he suffers from "[[Noviophobia|novio phobia]]." This refers to his frustration that females often tell him that they already have a boyfriend. While he does have [[Chris and sex|physical attraction]] towards females, his primary frustration is with his lack of companionship. He had also carried his sign in the [[Fashion Square Mall]]. This unfortunately lead to him being detained by [[Jerkops|the police]] and placed in handcuffs briefly, although he was not taken to jail.

During the interview, the patient provided the examiner with a number of examples of his [[Chris and art|artwork]]. Much of this artwork was centered on his interest in a video game, [[Sonic the Hedgehog]], as well as [[Pokemon|Pokeman [''sic'']]] cartoon characters.

The patient's parents provided additional historical information and documentation as to the reasons for his suspension from PVCC. According to his parents, there have been a number of incidents which lead to his suspension. They feel strongly that the suspension was unwarranted and did not take into account the patient's developmental limitations. One such occurrence was during an interaction with [[Niggos|African American]] classmates. These young women were questioning the patient regarding his search for a girlfriend, at which point he told them they could not be his girlfriend because they were not white. This was perceived as racially insensitive, although from the patient's perspective, he was merely pointing out they did not meet his standard criteria for a [[gal-pal|female companion]]. He says that he was unaware at the time that there was any other connotation to this. Various guidance counselors at the college were working with the patient to help him adjust to the college setting. They had apparently asked him to stop carrying the sign around campus, per the patient, one of these counselors actually physically destroyed the sign to prevent this behavior. He left an angry note with [[Mary Lee Walsh|Ms. Walsh]], who is in administration. He provided a copy of this note, and it is contained in the chart. It did not specifically [''continues on Page 2'']

===Page 2===
[[Image:CWCPsychicEvaluation11052004P2.jpg|thumb|right|Scan of page 2.]]
 Christian Chandler (003 79 67)
 Page 2 of 4
 November 5, 2004

[''Continuing from Page 1''] [[Death threats|threaten her]], but expressed his dislike of her and communicated [[The Creepy Stare|an "intimidating glare" in a pictorial fashion]]. Based on the letter sent to him by the college, this was interpreted by the administrator as being a form of harassment. There were several hearings held on the matter and ultimately the patient was suspended. The criteria that have been set for his return to Piedmont included [[Chris and anger|anger]] management classes, psychological evaluation, and "social skills counseling." He has already undergone psychological evaluation by Robin Hawkes at the Center of Learning Potential. The recommendation concerning Mr. Chandler's [[heart level|emotional status]] is that he seek psychiatric and psychological treatment. The psychologist felt that counseling and medication would possibly address his obsessive thought patterns and assist him with social skills. She also recommended anger management training.

====PAST PSYCHIATRIC HISTORY:====

Mr. Chandler was diagnosed with autism around age five or six. He has never had ongoing treatment by a psychiatrist, but has been treated in the past by [[Wikipedia:Imipramine|Imipramine]] [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|for unclear reason]] [''sic'']. He has never been in a psychiatric hospital and has no history of violent or self-injurious behavior. He has no history of [[Rape|sexual acting out]].

===[[Chris and health|PAST MEDICAL HISTORY]]:===

The patient has not had significant medical problems other than his autism. He has no history of head injury, loss of consciousness, seizures, CNS infections, stroke.

====MEDICATIONS:====

:[[Wikipedia:Paxil|Paxil]] 20 mgs. q. day, which the patient has been on for the past four years.

:Herbal supplements/over-the-counter - none.

====ALLERGIES:====

None known.

====SUBSTANCE ABUSE:====

The patient does not use [[Tobacky|tobacco]] or [[My Coke Rewards|caffeine]]. He does not [[Alcohol|drink]] and he does not use illicit substances.

====SOCIAL HISTORY:====

The patient was born in the [[Ruckersville]] area. He had a normal prenatal period. He walked at normal age but was delayed in his language ability. He had some high frequency hearing loss early on. Per his parents, he did not speak until the age of seven. At around age twelve, he began to develop more effective communication skills. He apparently used the closed captioning on the television to learn how to read. There was conflict over where he would have his schooling. The school system or the Department of Social Services had attempted to place the patient in a special school. His parents were very adamant that he be in a mainstream high school. In order to maintain custody of the patient, [[bob|the patient's father]] moved them to [[Richmond]], Virginia. He went to a regular middle school and [[high school]] while there. He was able to function well academically and graduated from high school in regular classes. He had a number of friends through middle and high school.

===Page 3===
[[Image:CWCPsychicEvaluation11052004P3.jpg|thumb|right|Scan of page 3.]]

Christian Chandler (003 79 67) 
Page 3 of 4 
November 5, 2004

====FAMILY HISTORY:====

The patient's father has significant [[Wikipedia:Coronary artery disease|Coronary Artery Disease]] and recently had a bypass graph done. He is 77-years-old and is retired engineer from General Electric. [[Barb|His mother]] is 65-years-old and worked in the past at a local bank. Neither of his parents or any other family members are known to have any psychiatric disease. The patient has a maternal cousin who has severe autism, although there are no other family members with developmental delays.

====MENTAL STATUS EXAM:====

The patient is a mildly [[fat|overweight]], white male, wearing blue jeans and a [[Chris and fashion|shirt]]. He was also wearing a makeshift necklace that has [[Medallion_of_Fail#Prototype|a large plastic medallion in the shape of a Pokeman [''sic''] characters [''sic''] head]]. He also had a number of “shrinky dink” decorations attached to this necklace. He had a large backpack that he carried with him and had a [[Scrapbook of Fail|notebook containing a large number of drawings]]. He showed the examiner an extensive set of [[Card games|trading cards]], which he created for his video game characters. The artwork was hand drawn and then scanned into the [[computer]] for transfer to the card. He had a number of statistics and other information on the backside of the card. The patient pointed out a series of cards that were of a video game theme, but depicted him in various difficult situations in which he has dealt with recently. He also presented the examiner with his business card containing a link to [[Sonichu.net|his website]]. His speech was somewhat nasal with frequent, awkward laughing during his sentences. His speech was fluent. His responses were appropriate to the questions posed to him. Overall, the volume of his speech was slightly elevated, although his tone was generally pleasant and almost jovial. His thought processes were linear and logical. He was somewhat concrete, especially regarding social interactions. He seemed to have good insight into his limitations. As suggested above, his thought content was largely based on his interest in Pokeman [''sic''] and sonic [''sic''] cartoons. He did not express any delusional thought content. There was perhaps an obsessional quality to [[Love Quest|his preoccupation with finding a girlfriend]], although he did not feel that this was a problem for him. He did not voice any perceptual disturbances and did not seem to be responding to internal stimuli. His impulse control appeared to be good during the interview and his judgment was fair, although social judgment was likely somewhat limited.

[[Wikipedia:Mini-mental state examination|Folstein score]] was 30/30 with his sentence being, “[[Random access humor|Uncle Spunky is a really funky monkey.]]”

====IMPRESSION:====
Mr. Chandler is a 22-year-old man with a history of developmental delays and autism. Despite these limitations, he seems to have been [[Honor Roll|quite successful in maximizing his academic abilities]]. Despite his significant delays in language, he has over the years developed relatively affective [''sic''] communication skills. He is left, however, with a severe degree of social awkwardness and seems to have good insight into this. He is left feeling somewhat frustrated as he has a strong desire for companionship, although his social limitations prevent him from being able to realize this in the way which he would like. He has been on antidepressants for many years and it is not entirely clear what role they played. As mentioned above, there is a certain obsessional quality to his thoughts, although it is not clear that he meets criteria for an obsessive-compulsive disorder. Overall, he has a sense that the Paxil has been affective [''sic''] in tempering his frustrations and anger. His parents also feel he has benefited from it. He would possibly benefit from psychotherapy, although this would need to be tailored to his interpersonal style. Ideally this would be done in a setting tailored to patients with this sort of developmental problem. Based on the information available at this time, the patient doesn't seem to pose a significant threat to himself or anyone else. There is some suggestion that the anger control has been a problem, although how that has manifested itself is unclearly[''sic'']. He certainly has no history of physical violence which would suggest any future risk.

===Page 4===
[[Image:CWCPsychicEvaluation11052004P4.jpg|thumb|Scan of page 4.]]

Christian Chandler (003 79 67) 
Page 4 of 4 
November 5, 2004

====DIAGNOSIS:====
[[Wikipedia:Diagnostic_and_Statistical_Manual_of_Mental_Disorders#Multi-axial_system|Axis]] I: None 
Axis II: Autistic disorder, [[Wikipedia:DSM-IV_Codes#Pervasive_developmental_disorders|299.00]] 
Axis III: None 
Axis IV: Suspension from school, social isolation 
Axis V: [[Wikipedia:Global Assessment of Functioning|70]] 

====PLAN:====
1. After discussing the risks, benefits, and side effects, the patient and his parents agreed to have his Paxil increased from 20 mgs. to 30 mgs. They were offered a prescription, but preferred to have this done by their primary care physician.

2. Releases of information were signed for the counselors at PVCC in case this became necessary for further evaluation purposes.

3. We will try to work with the department of rehab services to facilitate any other services that might be available for Mr. Chandler

4. The patient's parents were unsure of whether they will be following up here at the clinic in the future as there are insurance concerns which might limit this. They were, however, informed of access to emergency care and encouraged to call the clinic with any questions or concerns.

5. No follow-up appointment has been scheduled, although should they wish to continue the patient's psychiatric care at this clinic, we would be more than happy to see him.

6. The patient was seen by the attending, Dr. Zachariah Dameron, who agrees with the above-mentioned assessment and treatment plan. 

Jeff Raynor, M.D. Zachariah C. Dameron, III, M.D. 
Resident in Psychiatric Medicine Attending 

JR:ns T: 11/12/04 D: 11/11/04

==See also==
*[[Autism]]
*[[Chris and health]]
*[[Chris and psychology]]

{{Relics of Fail}}
[[Category:Historical Documents]]

User talk:Croatchu

2013-07-30T22:38:57Z

Croatchu: Blanked the page

User talk:Croatchu

2013-07-30T22:38:49Z

Croatchu: Replaced content with " --WelcomeBot 14:37, 15 October 2011 (PDT)"

--[[User:WelcomeBot|WelcomeBot]] 14:37, 15 October 2011 (PDT)

Chris and money

2012-06-15T23:17:46Z

Croatchu:

{{quote|He's not good at math when it comes to managing money.|[[Bob Chandler]]<ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript]]</ref>}}

It's obvious that [[Chris]] himself has no grasp on the real value of '''money''', since he actively wastes as much of his [[monthly tugboat]] as possible on luxuries like [[Eye of Judgement|trading cards]], [[Officer Nasty|sex toys]], [[Duck|porn]], [[PS3|video games]], and, more recently, [[alcohol]] and [[Kaka Makeup Basics|make-up]]. He also once, when giving out the laws of [[CWCville]], equated 10 years in prison to a US$1,500 fine.<ref>[[Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008]]</ref> He also equated fifty hours of [[Wikipedia:Community service|community service]] to $500 (for any [[sex]]ual violations).<ref>[[Mailbag_31#Magi-Chan_knows_when_you_fuck]]</ref>

Chris is a self-admitted impulse buyer.<ref name="Miyamoto" /> His [[PSN]] account shows that he's never played more than half of the games he's bought. And yet, astoundingly, he's still gone out of his way to buy ''all'' available downloadable content for ''every'' [[PS3]] game that he's ever purchased, and he also further promoted his Sony fanboyism by later buying a Sony LCD HDTV for his bedroom which likely cost about $1,000-$1,500. All the while, Chris bought his [[Chris and fashion|clothes]] at second-hand discount thrift stores.

==But wait, Chris isn't employed! ==

Chris's only source of income is the $809 [[monthly tugboat|"tugboat"]] that he receives from the U.S. federal government every month, placing his annual income at $9,708. Chris's parents originally took $450 to pay for room and board.;<ref name="Miyamoto" /> this payment was later increased to $565, and then to $580, after [[Bob]] paid off Chris's enormous credit card debt.<ref>[[Vivian Gee E-mails, 2009#8 December]]</ref><ref>[[Jackie Chat 8]]</ref>

{{quote|My father helped me get my Social Security set up; I get more a month than I could at a job. Yet with my impuslive shoppiness (mostly controable [sic]), I end up spending my side-money after I get it.|Chris, [[Chris and His Ego|completely deluded and taking pride in being a lazy bastard]].<ref name="Miyamoto">[[Miyamoto Saga]]</ref>}}

[[Bob Chandler|Chris's father]] encouraged his son to remain unemployed, since he believed that Chris would earn more money from his monthly tugboat than he would have from getting a job. However, this assumption was and is inaccurate. Minimum wage in the state of [[Virginia]] is $7.25 an hour. If Chris were to somehow do a complete 180° on his life and begin working a full forty-hour week, his monthly payment before taxes and payment for room and board would be about $1,260: $15,100 annually. Subtracting what he pays his parents to live in filth monthly, as well as the 5% tax his income range mandates in the state of Virginia, Chris could very likely be left with a ridiculous $8,000 in ''spending'' money, as in, for more [[sex toys]] and [[video games]]. Contrast this with the $2,748 Chris pulls annually from the government after paying off his parents, and it becomes clear that Bob's encouragement comes from either thinking Chris would lose his social security if employed (which he wouldn't) or knowing that his son is a failure.

A very likely explanation for Chris's reckless spending is that his coddling parents are at fault (to a degree at least). In addition to coddling him throughout his entire life, they have managed to make sure that Chris has never felt the repercussions for his exorbitant spending by taking over paying Chris's credit card debt, regularly giving him about "$6 a day for small things", buying him [[List of restaurants|fast food]] on a daily basis, and continuing to let himself blow all his money on [[list of Chris's video games|frivolities]] and useless stuff, as opposed to essentials like [[Chris and health#Chris and hygiene|hygiene products]]. Whenever Chris manages to [[The GAMe PLACe|get himself into trouble]], he knows that Bob and Barb will come [[Matthew Noble call|running to his aid and defend him]] and dig him out of whatever mess he's managed to get himself into, even if it is clear that he [[Target|is in the wrong]]. This enabling is the most likely explanation (in addition to his [[autism|poor impulse control]]) for why Chris spends himself into debt as much as he does.

Chris believes that by receiving and spending his tugboat on useless shit, he is aiding the economy and paying for the tugboat of others.<ref>[[Mailbag 34#In which Chris fails economics forever]]</ref> Again, this demonstrates his idiocy since sales tax goes to the state government and these "tugboats" are paid with federal payroll tax. Apparently, this is too complex for Chris's autistic mind. Where Chris is hiding the printing press to afford this discretionary spending is unknown.

Interestingly enough, while he has no clue how to handle [[money]], Chris has an unhealthy [[Ego|fixation]] on his material possessions. In [[Vivitheg's AIM chat]], he stated that he did not want to sell any of his stuff, and in the [[Miyamoto Saga]], he refused to sell anything to help raise money for the trip to Redmond. His mother has served as a bad influence in both regards, as she would compulsively shop at Goodwill and compulsively hoard the purchases, which both wasted money and helped turn their house into the fire- and biohazard it is today.

With the possibility that he might end up in jail over the events of [[28 October 2011]], Chris' bad spending habits may come back to haunt him. In jail, he won't be able to collect his [[monthly tugboat]], and if a full year passes without him collecting his cheques, he will have to reapply for his welfare, something that would be a bit more difficult under the Obama administration, which doesn't look too kindly on social security due to the stress it causes to the overall economy,<ref>[http://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/24/us/politics/financial-outlook-dims-for-social-security.html]</ref> and has even started measures to cut them down altogether. <ref>[http://finance.yahoo.com/news/u-winds-down-longer-benefits-152809517.html]</ref> That, combined with the costs associated with court appearances as well as the fact that the last surviving breadwinner, Barbara, may also wind up in jail, will result in Chris being placed in very dire circumstances, something which [[Kacey|several]] [[Clyde Cash|trolls]] [[Kacey Call 1.5|have]] [[Mumble 4|tried]] and [[Playstation Vita|failed]] to warn him about.

==Credit cards==
As surprising as it is that Chris has his own credit cards, it is equally unsurprising how unwisely he uses them. As of [[February 2009]], Chris had managed to rack up $2,000 worth of debt (at the time of [[Mumble 4]], $1,000 of that sum came from the [[PSN]] store, but his bill for PSN downloads increased by the day) and had even stolen his parents' credit cards to use when his own were maxed out. According to an [[Vivian Gee E-mails 2|e-mail Chris sent to Vivian Gee]], by [[January 2010]] his debt was around $3,500 and had apparently been higher at some point in the intervening time.

By then, [[Bob Chandler]] had to step in, forcing Chris to put the brakes on his spending and pay down his debt according to a regular schedule. Chris, unaware of or uninterested in the fact that unpaid credit-card debt accrues severe interest, had historically made payments in the smallest installments possible.

Chris provided some more details about this situation in his [[Jackie E-mails 6|e-mails to Jackie]] from [[July 2010]]. At some point, Bob paid off Chris's credit card debt and took payment in installments out of the [[monthly tugboat]] in compensation. This act of parental scapegoating could have potentially cleared Chris's future to be free of bad credit and crushing debt, had he not already acquired another credit card...

=== Best Buy Mastercard ===

In the [[Matthew Noble call]], Bob himself revealed that Chris had not only acquired a MasterCard charge account through [[Best Buy]], but as of the second week of [[August 2010]], Chris had somehow used it to land himself in yet more debt and had been laden with fees for bouncing a card payment. Bob, in the throes of some sort of conspiracy paranoia involving the staff and patrons of [[the GAMe PLACe]], claimed that it was most likely [[Michael Snyder]] who had hacked Chris's credit card and checking accounts, though why someone who's been on a manager's salary for several years would bother stealing from Chris is unknown. Also unknown is why ''any'' financial institution would give Chris a line of credit at this point.

Bob continued that the resulting transactions may have ruined Chris's credit rating (though that ship has ''long'' since fucking sailed), and, in a disturbingly Chris-like fashion, seemed to use this damning information to try to make Chris's latest brush with the [[law]] seem "petty" in comparison.

There are three possibilities as to what actually occurred (from least to most likely):
* [[Troll]]s achieved this new pinnacle of fucking with Chris and didn't bother bragging about it on some forum or another.
* Some regular criminal's credit card fraud scheme, just by chance, hit Chris.
* Chris blew whatever little credit that Best Buy had foolishly given him; he mistakenly attempted to pay off the card with funds from his checking account that weren't there; and then he blamed his debt on trolls, in another transparent attempt to avoid responsibility.

One of Chris's [[Jackie E-mails 7|e-mails to Jackie]] reveals that Chris acquired the Best Buy charge card without his parents' permission: he only told them about it after receiving two bounced check fees that showed up on his bank statement, which his father was actively monitoring. In true Chris fashion, he tried to pay the minimum balance each month. When he was forced to reveal the debt to his parents, Bob was obviously less than thrilled. He promptly took control of Chris's bank account as well as his credit cards. Chris now receives only an allowance in the form of Visa gift cards, leaving him unable to accrue any more debt. The prospect of not being able to blow his welfare on frivolities [[Jackie E-mails 8|stressed him out]].

Curiously, even in his private communications with [[Jackie]], Chris claims that the overdraft fees that gave away the existence of the card to Bob were the work of trolls. Elsewhere in their conversations, however, he recounts other instances of "getting carried away" and accidentally overdrawing his bank account, suggesting that he's just using the trolls as a handy scapegoat for his own mistakes.

With Bob's passing comes the possibility that Chris may once again have full control of his money, putting at risk what Bob had worked toward. Chris's acquisition of the [[PlayStation Vita]] and over 600 dollars worth of video games for that system is most likely proof that Chris has regained control of his money and is tossing it away like it was nothing.

==In the comic==

[[File:Cwccash.jpg|thumb|250px|[[CWCville]] currency.]]
In [[Sonichu (comic)|the comic]] it is clear Chris has no idea how money works. [[Sonichu]], [[Rosechu]], [[Patti-Chan]], and most likely all of the other characters live off welfare, just like Chris IRL. He seems to have no concept of tax, or that it's the [[American]] populace who pay for his [[Kimmi|bullshit]]. Sonichu and Rosechu are living in a two-story house with an attic offered by the city and they are [[Mailbag 21#Home economics|"paid" in average]] of US$3,500 a month just to hang around. And maybe for the occasional [[Sonichu 9|city defense]] or [[A Sonichu Day|errand]].<ref>[[Mailbag 21#Home economics]]</ref>

In [[Sonichu 9|Episode 19]], it's shown that CWCVille actually issues its own currency, in the form of C-Quarters and W-Quarters. Ten C-Quarters make up a W-Quarter - don't bother asking how that makes sense in any way, considering [[honor roll|what the word "quarter" means]]. (Our best guess: C-Quarters = US$0.25, W-Quarters = US$2.50) Nor does it explain why fines are levied in U.S. dollars: perhaps to bolster the dictatorship's foreign currency reserves, ''à la'' [[Wikipedia:North Korea|North Korea]].

This makes even less sense considering [[CWCVille]] is part of the [[United States]]; states, let alone cities, cannot print their own money, despite holding considerable power over their own affairs. The Constitution expressly forbids anyone else other than the federal government from issuing currency. Granted, states have historically issued their own money - when they were colonies and during difficult times, such as the Revolutionary War. [[Chris]] being Chris, and likely reading [[Goosebumps]] instead of paying attention in class, missed out on this information.

==In other works==
Chris shows us his complete misunderstanding of the stress his ideas would put on the American [[Wikipedia:Social Security (United States)|Social Security]] system if he was left in charge of it in a text called "[[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas Story]]." This is where the idea of "Soup Hotels" came from.

{{quote|Even the homeless have a place to stay in the ten Soup Kitchens/Hotels.|Chris with a very bad idea [http://leoweekly.com/news/left-wayside that has come to fruition in one American city...]}}

Chris depicts "Soup Hotels" as buildings ten stories tall with between ten and twenty rooms per floor, equipped with single bathrooms, bed, lighting and cable TV.<ref>[[Mailbag 20]]</ref> Of course, the homeless stay there for free. So, instead of building homeless shelters with dormitories, common rooms, and shared TV sets, Chris thinks the homeless should be treated to all the comforts of a ''bona fide'' hotel. This means that, in [[CWCville]], there are around 1,500 homeless people left outside. This might be the result of the local industry, choked by heavy taxes needed to pay those social expenses, being unable to make a profit there and thus moving away.

In [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], [[Ultra Sonichu]] and a bevy of [[Rosechu (species)|Rosechus]] stop at a soup hotel. The building is labeled Soup Hotel 17, implying that [[CWCville]] has had to open at least seven new homeless shelters in the span of a month, or they're just bad at numbering the things. Or more tellingly, that the economy of CWCville is crashing to the ground, fast.

In [[Mailbag 29]] he stated that $10 an hour is a reasonable price to pay for sex with a prostitute. To show his further ignorance of simple economics, Chris proposed a chain of state-run brothels where this shockingly inexpensive fee would not only pay women for sex, pay the salary of a pimp (which would be a redundant middleman in a state-approved brothel), pay for STD testing for the prostitutes, but would also pay for free [[Dating education|Sex Ed classes]] for [[virgin]]s.

In real life, Chris tried to scam his way out of paying for sex with a Craigslist [[Chris and sex#Prostitution|prostitute]] who was charging $100 per hour by telling her about the trolls, his life story, and his many personal problems. The prostitute hung up on him. {{cite}}

In late [[October 2011]], Chris posted a Craigslist ad for a 12-year old 32" CRT television and expected a non-negotiable $250 for it;<ref>Craigslist#Television</ref> in reality, this is about the price of a new flatscreen HDTV of that size, and he would be lucky to get a tenth of his asking price.

Chris also proves us that, in the possibility of being part of a family, he wouldn't be the main purveyor. In the [[PlayingHouse]] video, his [[sweetheart]] of [[Jackie|the moment]] is portrayed as a successful journalist with high ambitions while he's a [[14 Branchland Court|stay at home]] Dad. Even then, he portrays himself doing "hard work" like [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|changing diapers]] and watching over the kids. In this last role, he's so incompetent that he needs to recruit his [[Crystal|preschool daughter]] to watch over [[Reginald Chandler|his son]] while he's shopping.

== On TV ==
In [[Mumble 6]], Chris discussed making a TV show called ''The Chris Chandler Show''. One of his demands was the show should not have any commercial breaks, either showing a distinct lack of understanding as to how a TV station makes money, or perhaps he plans to sell the advertising fees to a single company so that they can play a long ad in the beginning of the air time and leave the rest of the show uninterrupted, ''à-la'' the season premieres of [[wikipedia:24 (TV Series)|''24'']]. We cannot know for sure, but he has probably seen at least one show that has done this, and gathered the idea from there.

Chris also seems to not understand that [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|if the health department, of Greene County, sees that TV show, that he put on the damn TV, they could be evicted, and he would have to move out]].

==See also==
*[[Monthly tugboat]]

== Sources ==
<references/>

{{Chris and}}

Chris and money

2012-06-15T23:10:35Z

Croatchu:

{{quote|He's not good at math when it comes to managing money.|[[Bob Chandler]]<ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript]]</ref>}}

It's obvious that [[Chris]] himself has no grasp on the real value of '''money''', since he actively wastes as much of his [[monthly tugboat]] as possible on luxuries like [[Eye of Judgement|trading cards]], [[Officer Nasty|sex toys]], [[Duck|porn]], [[PS3|video games]], and, more recently, [[alcohol]] and [[Kaka Makeup Basics|make-up]]. He also once, when giving out the laws of [[CWCville]], equated 10 years in prison to a US$1,500 fine.<ref>[[Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008]]</ref> He also equated fifty hours of [[Wikipedia:Community service|community service]] to $500 (for any [[sex]]ual violations).<ref>[[Mailbag_31#Magi-Chan_knows_when_you_fuck]]</ref>

Chris is a self-admitted impulse buyer.<ref name="Miyamoto" /> His [[PSN]] account shows that he's never played more than half of the games he's bought. And yet, astoundingly, he's still gone out of his way to buy ''all'' available downloadable content for ''every'' [[PS3]] game that he's ever purchased, and he also further promoted his Sony fanboyism by later buying a Sony LCD HDTV for his bedroom which likely cost about $1,000-$1,500. All the while, Chris bought his [[Chris and fashion|clothes]] at second-hand discount thrift stores.

==But wait, Chris isn't employed! ==

Chris's only source of income is the $809 [[monthly tugboat|"tugboat"]] that he receives from the U.S. federal government every month, placing his annual income at $9,708. Chris's parents originally took $450 to pay for room and board.;<ref name="Miyamoto" /> this payment was later increased to $565, and then to $580, after [[Bob]] paid off Chris's enormous credit card debt.<ref>[[Vivian Gee E-mails, 2009#8 December]]</ref><ref>[[Jackie Chat 8]]</ref>

{{quote|My father helped me get my Social Security set up; I get more a month than I could at a job. Yet with my impuslive shoppiness (mostly controable [sic]), I end up spending my side-money after I get it.|Chris, [[Chris and His Ego|completely deluded and taking pride in being a lazy bastard]].<ref name="Miyamoto">[[Miyamoto Saga]]</ref>}}

[[Bob Chandler|Chris's father]] encouraged his son to remain unemployed, since he believed that Chris would earn more money from his monthly tugboat than he would have from getting a job. However, this assumption was and is inaccurate. Minimum wage in the state of [[Virginia]] is $7.25 an hour. If Chris were to somehow do a complete 180° on his life and begin working a full forty-hour week, his monthly payment before taxes and payment for room and board would be about $1,260: $15,100 annually. Subtracting what he pays his parents to live in filth monthly, as well as the 5% tax his income range mandates in the state of Virginia, Chris could very likely be left with a ridiculous $8,000 in ''spending'' money, as in, for more [[sex toys]] and [[video games]]. Contrast this with the $2,748 Chris pulls annually from the government after paying off his parents, and it becomes clear that Bob's encouragement comes from either thinking Chris would lose his social security if employed (which he wouldn't) or knowing that his son is a failure.

A very likely explanation for Chris's reckless spending is that his coddling parents are at fault (to a degree at least). In addition to coddling him throughout his entire life, they have managed to make sure that Chris has never felt the repercussions for his exorbitant spending by taking over paying Chris's credit card debt, regularly giving him about "$6 a day for small things", buying him [[List of restaurants|fast food]] on a daily basis, and continuing to let himself blow all his money on [[list of Chris's video games|frivolities]] and useless stuff, as opposed to essentials like [[Chris and health#Chris and hygiene|hygiene products]]. Whenever Chris manages to [[The GAMe PLACe|get himself into trouble]], he knows that Bob and Barb will come [[Matthew Noble call|running to his aid and defend him]] and dig him out of whatever mess he's managed to get himself into, even if it is clear that he [[Target|is in the wrong]]. This enabling is the most likely explanation (in addition to his [[autism|poor impulse control]]) for why Chris spends himself into debt as much as he does.

Chris believes that by receiving and spending his tugboat on useless shit, he is aiding the economy and paying for the tugboat of others.<ref>[[Mailbag 34#In which Chris fails economics forever]]</ref> Again, this demonstrates his idiocy since sales tax goes to the state government and these "tugboats" are paid with federal payroll tax. Apparently, this is too complex for Chris's autistic mind. Where Chris is hiding the printing press to afford this discretionary spending is unknown.

Interestingly enough, while he has no clue how to handle [[money]], Chris has an unhealthy [[Ego|fixation]] on his material possessions. In [[Vivitheg's AIM chat]], he stated that he did not want to sell any of his stuff, and in the [[Miyamoto Saga]], he refused to sell anything to help raise money for the trip to Redmond. His mother has served as a bad influence in both regards, as she would compulsively shop at Goodwill and compulsively hoard the purchases, which both wasted money and helped turn their house into the fire- and biohazard it is today.

With the possibility that he might end up in jail over the events of [[28 October 2011]], Chris' bad spending habits may come back to haunt him. In jail, he won't be able to collect his [[monthly tugboat]], and if a full year passes without him collecting his cheques, he will have to reapply for his welfare, something that would be a bit more difficult under the Obama administration, which doesn't look too kindly on social security due to the stress it causes to the overall economy,<ref>[http://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/24/us/politics/financial-outlook-dims-for-social-security.html]</ref> and has even started measures to cut them down altogether. <ref>[http://finance.yahoo.com/news/u-winds-down-longer-benefits-152809517.html]</ref> That, combined with the costs associated with court appearances as well as the fact that the last surviving breadwinner, Barbara, may also wind up in jail, will result in Chris being placed in very dire circumstances, something which [[Kacey|several]] [[Clyde Cash|trolls]] [[Kacey Call 1.5|have]] [[Mumble 4|tried]] and [[Playstation Vita|failed]] to warn him about.

==Credit cards==
As surprising as it is that Chris has his own credit cards, it is equally unsurprising how unwisely he uses them. As of [[February 2009]], Chris had managed to rack up $2,000 worth of debt (at the time of [[Mumble 4]], $1,000 of that sum came from the [[PSN]] store, but his bill for PSN downloads increased by the day) and had even stolen his parents' credit cards to use when his own were maxed out. According to an [[Vivian Gee E-mails 2|e-mail Chris sent to Vivian Gee]], by [[January 2010]] his debt was around $3,500 and had apparently been higher at some point in the intervening time.

By then, [[Bob Chandler]] had to step in, forcing Chris to put the brakes on his spending and pay down his debt according to a regular schedule. Chris, unaware of or uninterested in the fact that unpaid credit-card debt accrues severe interest, had historically made payments in the smallest installments possible.

Chris provided some more details about this situation in his [[Jackie E-mails 6|e-mails to Jackie]] from [[July 2010]]. At some point, Bob paid off Chris's credit card debt and took payment in installments out of the [[monthly tugboat]] in compensation. This act of parental scapegoating could have potentially cleared Chris's future to be free of bad credit and crushing debt, had he not already acquired another credit card...

=== Best Buy Mastercard ===

In the [[Matthew Noble call]], Bob himself revealed that Chris had not only acquired a MasterCard charge account through [[Best Buy]], but as of the second week of [[August 2010]], Chris had somehow used it to land himself in yet more debt and had been laden with fees for bouncing a card payment. Bob, in the throes of some sort of conspiracy paranoia involving the staff and patrons of [[the GAMe PLACe]], claimed that it was most likely [[Michael Snyder]] who had hacked Chris's credit card and checking accounts, though why someone who's been on a manager's salary for several years would bother stealing from Chris is unknown. Also unknown is why ''any'' financial institution would give Chris a line of credit at this point.

Bob continued that the resulting transactions may have ruined Chris's credit rating (though that ship has ''long'' since fucking sailed), and, in a disturbingly Chris-like fashion, seemed to use this damning information to try to make Chris's latest brush with the [[law]] seem "petty" in comparison.

There are three possibilities as to what actually occurred (from least to most likely):
* [[Troll]]s achieved this new pinnacle of fucking with Chris and didn't bother bragging about it on some forum or another.
* Some regular criminal's credit card fraud scheme, just by chance, hit Chris.
* Chris blew whatever little credit that Best Buy had foolishly given him; he mistakenly attempted to pay off the card with funds from his checking account that weren't there; and then he blamed his debt on trolls, in another transparent attempt to avoid responsibility.

One of Chris's [[Jackie E-mails 7|e-mails to Jackie]] reveals that Chris acquired the Best Buy charge card without his parents' permission: he only told them about it after receiving two bounced check fees that showed up on his bank statement, which his father was actively monitoring. In true Chris fashion, he tried to pay the minimum balance each month. When he was forced to reveal the debt to his parents, Bob was obviously less than thrilled. He promptly took control of Chris's bank account as well as his credit cards. Chris now receives only an allowance in the form of Visa gift cards, leaving him unable to accrue any more debt. The prospect of not being able to blow his welfare on frivolities [[Jackie E-mails 8|stressed him out]].

Curiously, even in his private communications with [[Jackie]], Chris claims that the overdraft fees that gave away the existence of the card to Bob were the work of trolls. Elsewhere in their conversations, however, he recounts other instances of "getting carried away" and accidentally overdrawing his bank account, suggesting that he's just using the trolls as a handy scapegoat for his own mistakes.

With Bob's passing comes the possibility that Chris may once again have full control of his money, putting at risk what Bob had worked toward. Chris's acquisition of the [[PlayStation Vita]] and over 600 dollars worth of video games for that system is most likely proof that Chris has regained control of his money and is tossing it away like it was nothing.

==In the comic==

[[File:Cwccash.jpg|thumb|250px|[[CWCville]] currency.]]
In [[Sonichu (comic)|the comic]] it is clear Chris has no idea how money works. [[Sonichu]], [[Rosechu]], [[Patti-Chan]], and most likely all of the other characters live off welfare, just like Chris IRL. He seems to have no concept of tax, or that it's the [[American]] populace who pay for his [[Kimmi|bullshit]]. Sonichu and Rosechu are living in a two-story house with an attic offered by the city and they are [[Mailbag 21#Home economics|"paid" in average]] of US$3,500 a month just to hang around. And maybe for the occasional [[Sonichu 9|city defense]] or [[A Sonichu Day|errand]].<ref>[[Mailbag 21#Home economics]]</ref>

In [[Sonichu 9|Episode 19]], it's shown that CWCVille actually issues its own currency, in the form of C-Quarters and W-Quarters. Ten C-Quarters make up a W-Quarter - don't bother asking how that makes sense in any way, considering [[honor roll|what the word "quarter" means]]. (Our best guess: C-Quarters = US$0.25, W-Quarters = US$2.50) Nor does it explain why fines are levied in U.S. dollars: perhaps to bolster the dictatorship's foreign currency reserves, ''à la'' [[Wikipedia:North Korea|North Korea]].

This makes even less sense considering [[CWCVille]] is part of the [[United States]], and states, let alone cities, while having considerable power, cannot print their own money. The Constitution expressly forbids anyone else other than the federal government from issuing currency. Granted, states used to issue their own money - when they were colonies, and during hard times like the Revolutionary War. [[Chris]] being Chris, and likely reading [[Goosebumps]] instead of paying attention in class, missed out on this information.

==In other works==
Chris shows us his complete misunderstanding of the stress his ideas would put on the American [[Wikipedia:Social Security (United States)|Social Security]] system if he was left in charge of it in a text called "[[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas Story]]." This is where the idea of "Soup Hotels" came from.

{{quote|Even the homeless have a place to stay in the ten Soup Kitchens/Hotels.|Chris with a very bad idea [http://leoweekly.com/news/left-wayside that has come to fruition in one American city...]}}

Chris depicts "Soup Hotels" as buildings ten stories tall with between ten and twenty rooms per floor, equipped with single bathrooms, bed, lighting and cable TV.<ref>[[Mailbag 20]]</ref> Of course, the homeless stay there for free. So, instead of building homeless shelters with dormitories, common rooms, and shared TV sets, Chris thinks the homeless should be treated to all the comforts of a ''bona fide'' hotel. This means that, in [[CWCville]], there are around 1,500 homeless people left outside. This might be the result of the local industry, choked by heavy taxes needed to pay those social expenses, being unable to make a profit there and thus moving away.

In [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], [[Ultra Sonichu]] and a bevy of [[Rosechu (species)|Rosechus]] stop at a soup hotel. The building is labeled Soup Hotel 17, implying that [[CWCville]] has had to open at least seven new homeless shelters in the span of a month, or they're just bad at numbering the things. Or more tellingly, that the economy of CWCville is crashing to the ground, fast.

In [[Mailbag 29]] he stated that $10 an hour is a reasonable price to pay for sex with a prostitute. To show his further ignorance of simple economics, Chris proposed a chain of state-run brothels where this shockingly inexpensive fee would not only pay women for sex, pay the salary of a pimp (which would be a redundant middleman in a state-approved brothel), pay for STD testing for the prostitutes, but would also pay for free [[Dating education|Sex Ed classes]] for [[virgin]]s.

In real life, Chris tried to scam his way out of paying for sex with a Craigslist [[Chris and sex#Prostitution|prostitute]] who was charging $100 per hour by telling her about the trolls, his life story, and his many personal problems. The prostitute hung up on him. {{cite}}

In late [[October 2011]], Chris posted a Craigslist ad for a 12-year old 32" CRT television and expected a non-negotiable $250 for it;<ref>Craigslist#Television</ref> in reality, this is about the price of a new flatscreen HDTV of that size, and he would be lucky to get a tenth of his asking price.

Chris also proves us that, in the possibility of being part of a family, he wouldn't be the main purveyor. In the [[PlayingHouse]] video, his [[sweetheart]] of [[Jackie|the moment]] is portrayed as a successful journalist with high ambitions while he's a [[14 Branchland Court|stay at home]] Dad. Even then, he portrays himself doing "hard work" like [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|changing diapers]] and watching over the kids. In this last role, he's so incompetent that he needs to recruit his [[Crystal|preschool daughter]] to watch over [[Reginald Chandler|his son]] while he's shopping.

== On TV ==
In [[Mumble 6]], Chris discussed making a TV show called ''The Chris Chandler Show''. One of his demands was the show should not have any commercial breaks, either showing a distinct lack of understanding as to how a TV station makes money, or perhaps he plans to sell the advertising fees to a single company so that they can play a long ad in the beginning of the air time and leave the rest of the show uninterrupted, à-la the season premieres of [[wikipedia:24 (TV Series)|''24'']]. We cannot know for sure, but he has probably seen at least one show that has done this, and gathered the idea from there.

Chris also seems to not understand that [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|if the health department, of Greene County, sees that TV show, that he put on the damn TV, they could be evicted, and he would have to move out]].

==See also==
*[[Monthly tugboat]]

== Sources ==
<references/>

{{Chris and}}

Alex's Lemonade Stand

2012-06-12T22:13:47Z

Croatchu: Citation needed for claim that Chris successfully hosted the stand

[[File:Cwcville Helps.png|thumb|"Cwcville Helps", [[February 2012]]]]
{{Quote|I, as a [[Money|charitable]] individual, like helping others, and Children are our future. So, I am participating during the weekend to help the cause to cure cancer in children, so they all can grow into fine, [[Health|healthy adults]].|[[Chris]]|being ironic.}}

'''Alex's Lemonade Stand''' is a charity program that was set up by [[Lego]] in conjunction with their "[[Gal-pals|Friends]]" theme, which is intended for little girls. Chris, being the [[Tomgirl]] and fan of Lego that he is, has pledged to set up a lemonade stand in hopes of raising money for his "father who died of cancer", despite the fact [[Bob]] actually died of heart failure. Although his reasoning for creating the stand is still unclear, he may have thought that the money would go to him so he could buy more [[video games|vidya]].

== The event ==
[[File:ChrisLemonadeStand.jpg|300px|right|He did it!Hallelujah]]

According to the event page, entitled "[[Cwcville]] Helps", Chris was originally running a lemonade stand for all three days of the event - from 9 a.m. until 5 p.m on Friday, June 8 through Sunday, June 10, 2012, more work than Chris has done since [[Cutco]] ditched him nine years ago. The stand was originally to be set up outside [[Chris's house]], then moved to the old [[Wikipedia:Circuit City Stores|Circuit City]] building, 100 Albemarle Square, [[Charlottesville]], and then to [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church]]. The initial fundraising goal of US$50 was quickly met after donations from Chris's friends, neighbors and fans, as well as some more sinister figures, such as [[Clyde Cash]] and the [[Man in the Pickle Suit]]. As of June 2, the total amount of donations exceeded $150, although Chris never changed his original donation goal.

[[Image:132950942315.png|frame|center|Shit was so cash!]]

The page was later deleted, for reasons unknown; it is likely that Chris decided that raising money for ''dying children'' wasn't worth the [[stress]] of hearing mean things from [[trolls]]. It resurfaced at the beginning of June with the new location listed as his church.

As of June 10, Chris has successfully hosted the lemonade stand (with some help from his congregation and UVA students) and pledged to give the money towards the organization the following day{{cite}}. Notably, this is one of the few incidents where Chris has both followed through on his promise, and positively contributed towards the community.

==External links==
*[http://www.alexslemonade.org/mypage/80275 Cwcville's page on Alex's Lemonade Stand]

{{The Internet}}
[[Category:Chris's house]]
[[Category:Websites]]

Virgin with rage

2012-05-29T19:48:28Z

Croatchu: Added "Article of the Now" acknowledgement

{{Articleofthenow}}

{{quote|Tell me why I'm stuck as a virgin with rage Tell me why I so need a cute girl my age|[[So Need a Cute Girl]]}}

[[Image:106-FrustratedVirgin.jpg|thumb|[[Autism|WHY?!]]]]

'''Virgin with rage''' was [[Chris's]] description of himself whilst he was still a virgin. Chris claimed that when he was a virgin, his condition engendered [[stress|frustration]] and [[rage]]. It remains to be seen whether the loss of his virginity will change anything.

Chris was very self-conscious about being a virgin, and frequently brought up the subject unprompted, even in casual conversation with people he had only just met. However, after being advised by his parents that it wasn't a good idea to mention that he was a VIRGIN WITH RAGE, he stopped this practice,<ref>[[Chris-Chan_(CWCipedia)#Chris_in_Person_.28From_THEIR_Point_of_View.29]]</ref> one of the few times he has learned from his mistakes.

== Hormonal rage ==
Chris was extremely distressed about the possibility of being destined to be a virgin forever.

{{quote|Sometimes I would want to touch her shoulder or back, feel her hair or give her a hug. I hold those urges back, because I care about her. And to keep myself from flying crazily off the handle at a random time, I keep my hormones in check at least twice a week by myself.|Chris on [[Megan]], [[Story of My Current Days]]}}

Despite his claims that he was "holding back", the emails with [[Megan]] paint a different picture, describing instances of him doing exactly what he says he wouldn't, by giving her random and unwanted touches.<ref>[[Megan Emails, 2008]]</ref><ref>[[Mimms_and_Lucas_Q%26A#Chris_and_Megan]]</ref>

In another instance, Chris attempted to kiss [[Emily]] by surprise, during an unusually generous hug, however she was able to avoid it, and left unscarred.<ref>[[Emily#Kiss_fail]]</ref>

Likewise, [[Facebook]] correspondence between Chris and a young man named Joshua Alba revealed this pearl:
{{quote|I've thought of a funny message for a Valentine's Day card. On the outside, "Please Be Mine," and on the inside, "My hormones are slam-banging, and I do not have a woman to put them in."

I am not a sex freak; I'm just lonesome and sometimes horny.|Chris, [[Facebook messages]], 10 January 2010<ref>[[Facebook_messages#Other]]</ref>}}

==References by Chris==
*"[[So Need a Cute Girl]]", a song which Chris recorded in August [[2003]], features the first known use of the term "virgin with rage."
*Chris's letter to ''Nintendo Power'' about ''[[Sprung]]'' from the spring of 2004 concludes, "So thank you, [[Nintendo]] and Ubisoft, for the dating advice that this frustrated virgin needed."
*The first issue of ''[[Sonichu's News Dash]]'' from [[2004]] featured Chris's poem "[[Saddest Heart in the World]]", where he whines repeatedly about his virginity and repeats some of the lyrics from "So Need a Cute Girl."
*According to an entry in [[CWC's_Diary#September.2C_2004|CWC's Diary]] from September [[2004]], Chris told his "Lonesome Virgin story" to a [[jerkop]] who interrupted his loitering at the mall.
*After he lost [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown]], Chris sent an angry e-mail to Sony, where he announced "YET NOW I, A FRUSTRATED HIGH-FUNCTIONALLY AUTISTIC 25-YEAR OLD VIRGIN, HAVE BEEN [[South Park|BALLZ-BROKEN]] LIKE I HAVE THROUGH A BIG CHUNK OF MY LIFE IN AMERICA'S FAVORITE GAME, "[[KICK THE AUTISTIC]]!" *[[sigh]]*"
*Likewise, his [[PSN_Blogs#4_August_2007_.E2.80.94_Adam_Stackhouse.21.21.21|PSN Blog]] update from after losing the contest includes the line "I am a FRUSTRATED, High-Functionally AUTISTIC, 25-YEAR OLD VIRGIN."
*In Chris's first video address of the post-[[Encyclopedia Dramatica|ED]] era, [[Chris Chan's Public Announcement]], he doesn't actually come out and bluntly announce that he's a virgin. [[CWC's Second Message]], however, hammers the point home. There, Chris calls himself "the innocent, still 26-year-old virgin."
*During his IRC fan chat from [[Chris's Sonichu IRC Chloe Introduction|26 October 2008]], Chris billed his fictitious new girlfriend [[Chloe]] as his "VIRGIN-TAKER."
*Chris's New Year's resolution for [[2009]], announced on [[IRC (02 January 2009)|IRC]]: "Lose my Virginity with a Woman." Like most people's New Year's resolutions, he failed to follow through.
*While molesting his blow-up doll in the [[I am devoted to My Sweetest Ivy]] video from 17 [[April 2009]], Chris says, "Ivy, I promise you, I promise you my undying love and devotion, I promise you my heart, my soul, even my virginity..."
*Chris's [[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile|Wikipedia profile]] from [[May 2009]] includes multiple references to his virginity.
*In the [[CWC Trollin More]] video from 19 [[July 2009]], Chris announced that he was "still a virgin," retracting one of the more obvious lies in the [[Rollin' and Trollin']] video.
*At the end of [[CCWC's Final Warning to the Second CWC]], from 9 [[August 2009]], Chris sums up his achievements in life (including his [[Julie|trip to Ohio]]) and says that "the—only thing—mark that's not been checked yet for a good life is the virgin-breaker."
*One of Chris's posts on the [[Adult Swim posts|Adult Swim forums]] was signed "Lonely Virgin in Virginia, searching for a Sweetheart-Soulmate."
*In the [[Common_Questions#15_January_2010|Common Questions]] from 15 [[January 2010]], a correspondent asked Chris why he was so fixated on sex. He answered, "Oh, I don't know, how about being a Frustrated Virgin?!"
*Chris's [["Damian Antaria", PLEASE, Don't Leave Me - I NEED YOU!!!|plea for sex to Damian Antaria]], uploaded 14 [[March 2010]], features his standard whine about being "a 28-year-old high-functioning autistic virgin."

==No longer a virgin (no word on the rage)==
On 12 [[April 2012]] a leaked [[Facebook]] message showed that Chris has been bragging about losing his virginity recently. There is some evidence in the post that, (if it is true, considering Chris' [[Lie|track record]]), it may have been a hired prostitute, given that she compared him to the last guy she was with, told him a [[Duck|blatant lie]] to make him feel good about himself and the most telling of all, Chris saying that his eventual 'Sweetheart-to-be' will find out about it, meaning that this was a [[Fuck Quest|one night stand]].

Further evidence that the girl was a hooker was provided by Chris on 1 [[May 2012|May]] when he wrote in a [[Facebook#Hey, Trollies|Facebook note]] that his virgin breaker can be found "somewhere on the [http://www.backpage.com backpage]", a website known for featuring sex service ads.<ref>[http://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/19/opinion/kristof-not-quite-a-teen-yet-sold-for-sex.html?_r=1]</ref>

Since prostitution and solicitation of prostitution are illegal in Virginia,<ref>[http://prostitution.procon.org/view.background-resource.php?resourceID=767]</ref> Chris is either [[Lie|lying]] or [[Chris and the law|has committed yet another crime.]]

[[File:Virginbreaker.png]]

== Sources ==
{{Love quest}}
{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:CWC-isms]]

Autism

2012-05-21T17:33:24Z

Croatchu:

{{Articleofthenow}}
[[File:Auti.PNG|thumb|Odd that he respects [[Chris and copyright|trademarks]] when he feels like it...]]
{{quote|It sometimes takes me a long while before I can fully comprehend and make an appropriate reaction. In another word, '''I am Sometimes Retarded'''.|Chris, on himself.<ref>6th paragraph down: http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Homosexuality</ref>}}
{{quote|I'm POSSIBLY [[retarded]]...|Chris on his autism, [[Mumble]] chat 23 February 2009}}
{{quote|I'M RETARDED|Chris, [[CWC - Exposing Jeff]]}}

[[Image:086-BionicFlag.jpg|thumb|[[Bionic the Hedgehog]] "conquering" autism (and "ATScI3") by confusing windmills with watermills.]]
[[Image:461-AutismFight.jpg|thumb|Chris at war with autism (or "ATSIMU") in [[China]]. Too bad you can't fight cannons with [[fangs]].]]
[[Image:Autismcard.jpg|thumb|He plays this card a lot.]]
::''For the song, see [[A-U-T-I-S-M]].''
'''Autism''' is a spectrum of neurological disorders involving the impairment of social interaction and communication. The cause of autism is unknown, but has been shown to have multiple genetic factors. The symptoms usually manifest before the age of 3 and are generally irreversible; there is no cure, although the condition can be treated. Autistic individuals are generally not retarded — they mostly have average intelligence — although obviously severe social impairment can coincide with stunted learning and development. [[Asperger syndrome]] is generally considered part of the autistic spectrum; individuals with Asperger syndrome generally have above-average intelligence, although they still suffer from the social and communicative impairments. Prognosis depends on the severity of the autism and the effectiveness of its treatment; autistic people may learn to live relatively normal, productive lives or they may have become so unable to function in society that they must be institutionalized.

[[Christian Weston Chandler]] has built much of his identity around being autistic. His terror of being associated with severely autistic/retarded people causes him to be overly eager to prove his basic competence and cite his success in primary and secondary education. At the same time, his pride from accomplishing these things in spite of his disability has conditioned him to demand outrageous praise for his slightest efforts and infinite patience for his gravest errors. Moreover, Chris's belief that the entire Greene County Board of Education continues to irrationally persecute him for his autism has left him suspicious of opposing points of view and resolute that anti-autistic prejudice is the reason for any of his setbacks. In short, it is impossible to understand Chris's [[Chris and anger|defensiveness]], [[stress|hypersensitivity]], [[Chris and his Ego|narcissism]], [[Chris and remorse|irresponsibility]], [[Man in the Pickle Suit|paranoia]], [[100 2178|victimhood]], and [[Story of My Current Days|self-pity]] without understanding his relationship with autism.

Chris, in typical Chris fashion, not only seems to think that having autism imbues him with a [[Chris and his ego|special significance]], but also seems to think that his autism is different from that of every other person in the world who has autism. Because, you know, everything to do with Chris has to be [[slow-in-the-minds|special]]. Because he's autistic, Chris is, naturally, better than everyone else (because having autism automatically makes him a genius), and everyone should acknowledge how utterly brilliant he is. At the same time, Chris is not responsible for anything he ever does wrong, because he is autistic and that means it's not his fault if he [[Twin Falling Towers|does]] [[SheCameForCWC.jpg|stupid]] [[Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College#Kicked_Out_of_College|things]].

==High-functioning vs. low-functioning==

Informally, autism may be subdivided into separate classifications based on the intelligence and degree of function the autistic individual possesses; i.e., high-functioning, medium-functioning, and low-functioning. Chris has latched onto this concept and will frequently qualify his condition, saying he has '''high-functioning autism''', or '''HFA'''. Generally, HFA is loosely defined as the ability to live in the mainstream world as opposed to being institutionalized, near-normal comprehension, fluent speech, and about-average intellect. This lets Chris have it both ways: you can't blame him for his failures because he has autism, but you can't treat him like he's retarded because he's ''high-functioning'' and therefore, nearly normal.

[[Trolls]] have often noted that the "high-functioning" qualifier is '''not''' a clinical diagnosis and is '''not''' recognized by the [[Wikipedia:DSM-IV|DSM-IV-TR]] or the [[Wikipedia:ICD-10|ICD-10]]. This usually goes hand-in-hand with questioning the severity and/or diagnosis of Chris's impairment, if not outright calling him a [[lie|liar]]. However, the Chandlers didn't make the "HFA" label up, and compared to kids who can barely speak and just walk in circles all day, Chris is relatively close to neurotypical. Semantics aside, though, even the most casual of observers would conclude that Chris is basically non-functioning.

Disgustingly, but perhaps not surprisingly, Chris detests [[Slow-in-the-minds|low-functioning autistics]] in the [[Chris and hypocrisy|exact manner]] that he fears normal people will detest him. In [[Mailbag 25#High functioning babble|Mailbag 25]], he compares those with low-functioning autism with those who suffer from severe retardation or severe brain damage, thinking that they would have their arms linked together, have deformations, be confined to wheelchairs or crutches and drool and grunt and growl. He has also described them with extremely cruel and derisive terms, calling them "WINDOWS TO HELL" and compared them to "zombies".<ref>[[Mailbag_5#In which Chris speaks ill of the handicapped|Mailbag 5]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag_11#Elevators are important for the handicapped, so they don't want any phobias|Mailbag 11]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag_25#High functioning babble|Mailbag 25]]</ref> The irony of his resentment toward 'Low Functioning' Autistic people is that he has a severely autistic cousin, as revealed in the [[autism papers]]; this probably means that either Chris is not aware of his own relatives (very probable), or he has disowned members of his own family on the basis of them having the same medical condition that he has (albeit more severely affected by it), being the autism-Nazi he is.

He explains that he refuses to date a girl with any form of autism because he fears that seeing them will make him think about what he might be like if he had anything other than high-functioning autism.<ref>[[Chris_chan_(CWCipedia)#Chris_Chan_on_sticking_things_up_b.2A.2A.2Ahole.|Chris chan (CWCipedia)]]</ref> Chris believes he can do much more than any low-functioning autistic could, even as he's living with [[Barbara Chandler|his mother]], has never had a real girlfriend, and [[Dirty, crapped briefs|shits his pants]] on a semi-regular basis.<ref>[[Mumble 3]]</ref>

Still, presuming Chris is autistic, he is high-functioning since he can talk. However, this also means that he has the same medical condition as [[Microsoft|Bill Gates]] and the creator of [[Pokémon]] amongst many others, yet he has failed to do anything with his life, hence proving that his vulgarity and failure are utterly his fault.

{{clear}}

==Onset and diagnosis of Chris's autism==

{{quote|No one GIVES A SHIT that you are autistic, they NEVER DID.|[[Jackie E-mails 23|Jackie]]}}
[[Image:SchuComic10P09.jpg|thumb|Now GodBearJesus can't get him to shut up.]]

Chris's version of how he developed autism is best explained in the [[Song of Christian]] video. There he explains how a [[Abusive babysitter|babysitter]] locked him in a room filled with toys at around age 1 1/2. After bawwwing for hours, he emerged from his lair unable to talk (which implies that Chris could talk before this incident, and that would be in direct contradiction to Chris's own parents stating that he never spoke until around the age of seven); as Chris himself puts it, "[[Chris and Religion|God]] put the mute button on me." Most specialists claim that these symptoms of autism begin to show around that age anyway,<ref>[[wikipedia:Autism#Characteristics|Wikipedia: Autism Characteristics]]</ref> so even if the events of the story happened, the babysitter didn't cause the autism. It is far, far more likely that one or both of Chris's parents simply looked for anyone to blame for Chris's sudden loss of language development.

It is not currently clear how Chris came to be considered as "autistic," although Chris has claimed that his parents possess official documentation about this in a safe. When pressed to release this information, he provided a [[autism papers|2004 psychiatric evaluation]] that states Chris was diagnosed with autism when he was "around age five or six." However, there's no way to be sure if the evaluator simply wrote down Chris's responses to his questions or independently verified them. (For example, Chris might not remember his exact age when he was diagnosed, but you'd think his medical records could be more precise than "five or six.") By the time of the Chandlers' legal battle with Greene County, Chris's autism seemed to have become a universally accepted fact, but the details of how, when, and where Chris was diagnosed remain a mystery.

When recounting his childhood, Chris usually skips straight from the "evil babysitter" incident to age seven, so we know very little about what (if any) treatment he received during this crucial period of development. In a [[CWCipedia]] [[mailbag]], Chris claims that when he was young, his parents were told he would never be able to read, write or function on a normal level. He and his doctors have now upgraded his condition to "high-functioning," but apparently his incredibly abysmal upbringing has actually allowed it to progress to mid-functioning at best. However, his characteristics and development throughout his life may put him in the "Childhood Disintegrative Disorder" category, as he has become worse and worse over the years.

In his "Song of Christian" video, he explains that his mother took him to the toy department and coaxed him to read aloud the names of Go-Bots, and later [[Transformers]]. Chris says he began speaking again when he was seven— that is, in [[1989]], when the Transformers line was on its last legs and the Go-Bots line had long since vanished. This would seem to indicate that this form of "therapy" had to have gone on for several years before producing any results.

{{clear}}

==Persecution==

Chris attended [[Greene County Primary School]], apparently without incident, from age 5 until age 9. Problems arose for him in the fourth grade at [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]], where he alleges that the faculty wanted to remove him from mainstream classrooms and send him to what he calls an institution. He also claims that the teachers at the school held him down and recorded his screams. Chris frequently cites this as evidence that the school was senselessly cruel towards him, for no reason apparent to him except an innate fear and distrust of autistic people. More probable, given Chris's ongoing behavioral issues, is that he forced the faculty to restrain him by refusing to restrain himself. There's no way to know if Greene Elementary treated Chris unfairly, but the incident does suspiciously resemble Chris's [[arrest]] in July 2005. The Chandlers sued to prevent the school board from removing Chris from mainstream education before ultimately relocating to Chesterfield County to continue Chris's mainstreaming there.

There's no way to know how much of Chris's attitude about the Greene County crisis is based on his personal recollections or what he was later told by his parents, who themselves seem unusually paranoid about the county's vendetta against their family. However, the result of the incident is clear: Chris emerged from adolescence firmly believing that many people not only misunderstand autistic people but hate and fear them. He seems to believe this prejudice is based not on a person's actions (e.g., throwing fits and irrationally screaming) but on a person's mere identification as autistic, regardless of function. Given Chris's fear of low-functioning autistics, he may in fact think this prejudice is perfectly justified, but wrongfully targeted at a high-functioning individual. Of course, in Chris's mind, he may as well be the only high-functioning autistic in the universe, so he is the one and only innocent victim in "everyone's favorite game, [[Kick the Autistic]]."

Chris's [[Chris and Rape|tactful and sensitive]] comments on a news story about a woman with [[Asperger Syndrome]] being raped revealed that he believes the media, like the rest of the world, has a bias against autism similar to [[wikipedia:Missing white woman syndrome|"Missing White Woman Syndrome"]], and that the story wouldn't have been reported if the victim was a woman with "proper" autism.

==Chris's symptoms==

Many [[troll]]s dispute the exact diagnosis of Chris's mental condition, on the basis that his observed behavior is inconsistent with various autistic people. CWC-related forums (and other forums, for that matter) have seen numerous testimonials about people who are undeniably autistic but nowhere near as fucked-up as Chris has turned out to be, and in general these forums do not consider Chris to be an example of what all autistic people are like. Quite often, autistics are indeed able to learn social skills to some small degree in the context of intellectual learning. Some can even come off as being completely neurotypical because they have come to realize that, while they believe "normal" behavior has a tenuous definition, they must adapt to others' expectations of what's acceptable if they wish to succeed in life. Chris, however, demonstrates a willful ignorance of normalcy, with a sense of entitlement coupled with an expectation that others should not only understand his ridiculous idiosyncrasies in the first place, but also accept them or even force [[Dating education|them]] upon others.

A layperson may come to the conclusion that Chris is not autistic, and he's just a regular (albeit idiotic) guy with a few "eccentricities" (more like psychotic), or jump to the other extreme and conclude that Chris has full-blown mental retardation. However, Chris's characteristics are most likely a combination of [[Barbara|bad parenting]] and genuine autism. The following are aspects of Chris's character that clearly match autistic tendencies:

[[Image:0695-AnnaBD9.JPG|thumb|right|Awkward body language, as Chris displays here, is a common trait of autism.]]
[[Image:0430-ChristianWTallStack2.jpg|thumb|left|Stacking objects is a common symptom of autism, and is often one of its first signs in a young child.]]

*Chris displays virtually no coherent, working theory of mind. This is the essence of autism: autistics have difficulty gauging others' internal, subjective thoughts, feelings, ideas, intents and so on; understanding that these might be different than their own; and predicting their behavior based on these differences. Indeed, the prefix "aut-" is a form of "auto-", meaning "self," as in "automobile," meaning "self-moving". In [[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails|an email between Clyde Cash and him]], he sent Clyde a link to [[The MovingFoward videos|a video he made of himself destroying his PS3]]. He destroyed his PS3 under the egregiously mistaken impression that he'd be given $9,001 for it, which is in itself an indicator of his fundamental inability to gauge others' actual intents and future behavior. He filmed himself doing it specifically to prove to Clyde, who wasn't present for the destruction, that it happened according to the video's objective portrayal. However, he added that if Clyde showed the video to anyone Chris didn't mean to see it without paying him the money, "it can be considered [Clyde's] Word Alone, possible Movie Editing and Actors, and NOT Fact" as though the video would have any less evidential weight on others if he denied to them what he rightfully claimed to Clyde that it showed with enough certitude that he would give him thousands of dollars because of its being shown.

*Chris places disproportional importance on literal statements, another trait of autism. This is related to the above. Chris acted as though he could convince others of a fact contrary to videographic evidence simply by stating it. Another example is virtually the entire [[Liquid Chris#Liquid Saga|Liquid saga]], where Chris honestly, fervently, pathetically tried to demonstrate what was already blatantly obvious to everyone: that his name is not Ian Brandon Anderson and that Liquid was not him. He seemed to believe strongly enough [[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!|to become visibly frustrated]] that others might believe Liquid's statements in the face of the obvious that he had to continually counteract those statements with his own as though just the statements were the most important or most effective means of proving what everyone already knew.

*Chris is extremely gullible. While autistic people can have problems with social cues such as sarcasm, thus being gullible at times, Chris is much more gullible than other autistics, let alone ones that are high-functioning. This is more due to his [[naive|inexperience]]. One need only see his extensive [[list of sweethearts]] to see just how easily fooled he is. In addition, not only has he been fooled by trolls pretending to be girls, he has fallen for trolls pretending to be [[Shigeru Miyamoto]] and approaching him about making a Sonichu game. A telling statement comes from the aforementioned email to Clyde: "even if you upload the video yourself, it '''can be''' considered YOUR Word Alone[.]" (''emphasis added'') Chris might operate on the assumption that if a thing ''can be'' true, it's always reasonable to behave as though it ''is'' true no matter how slight the chance and no matter how much more likely it is to be false.

*Chris lacks a conversational filter. He calls this [[Honest Content|honesty]]; normal people call it social retardation. Without provocation he will tell you about his pinkeye and [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]], and how he is a [[virgin with rage]]. Only when his [[Barbara|mother]] told him to knock it off did he actually give up telling everyone he's a virgin<ref>[[Chris-Chan_(CWCipedia)#Chris_in_Person_.28From_THEIR_Point_of_View.29]]</ref>.

*Chris can't show emotions well with facial expressions and body language. See [[CWC only accepts IN-PERSON FEMALE Encounters|his statement to the women of the world]] if you like having Chris haunt your dreams. His inability to display emotions on his face has been called a "[[The Creepy Stare|dead fish expression]]." When he does attempt to have an expression, it looks very cartoonish. He typically speaks in a monotone, and his attempts to sound expressive (see [[CWC's Message for Ivy]]) come off as creepy and unnatural.

*Chris has very poor facial and vocal recognition skills. [[Julie]] was a 13 year old boy using an obvious falsetto and Chris fell for it. In [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|one chat]], the boy made no attempt to disguise his voice and Chris was none the wiser, disclosing personal sexual details. Two images of different people were used to represent [[Blanca Weiss]], and Chris didn't notice. In an [[Vanessa AIM Chat 9|AIM Chat]] with [[Vanessa Hudgens]], she sent him a link to pictures of Megan Fox, and Chris complimented her on them. It should be noted that the two have entirely different skin colors.

*[[White_knight#Chris_lacks_empathy_himself|Chris lacks empathy]] and concern for others. See his [[Chris's Plea to Clyde Cash|plea]] to Clyde. His suggestion after the loss of [[Ryan Cash]] was "find yourself a girlfriend." He asks for ED to [[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007|please understand]] him, because he is an "innocent victim of misunderstanding"—he wants empathy from others, but he can't return the favor. Chris primarily sees other people in terms of what they can provide for him; when accused of overstepping his bounds or other wrongdoing, he has no concept of [[Chris and remorse|remorse or apology]] except as something he must do to continue receiving favors. When forced to apologize, he makes insincere apologies followed immediately by further demands.

*Chris has trouble developing relationships. Many neurotypical people have the same problem, but Chris is particularly inept at socializing. He has no filter on what he says and cannot empathize with others, key prerequisites for successfully interacting with people. He also pretty much just talks about himself.

*Chris thinks in absolutes and in terms of clearly defined steps in order to do something. He thinks there must be sex on or by the [[third date]]. He describes his sadness in terms of his [[heart level]] and briefly mentioned a [[Scale of Respect]]. He feels that if he just knows the correct steps to getting a [[sweetheart]], he will be able to find one easily. His [[dating education|crash-course in dating]] and [[Dating|suggestions to Blanca]] assume that a relationship should follow a rigidly predetermined progression instead of a natural flow.
**In the [[Jackie E-mails 23|final exchange of e-mails with Jackie,]] Chris responded to Jackie's frank descriptions of his habits and lifestyle by telling her she had exceeded the "Hurtful Truth Level"; While he knows he should be appreciative of hearing the truth about himself, this was the only way he could wrap his brain around the abstract idea enough to be able to tell her he thought she'd gone too far.

*Chris tends to use solipsistic neologisms; that is, he creates new words that only he himself understands and expects other people to comprehend them. Many articles on this very wiki have been written to explain the resulting [[CWC-isms]].

*Chris exhibits compulsive and repetitive behavior. He wears the same [[shirt]] for days at a time, and uses the same terms and [[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor|exact]] [[boyfriend-free girl|phrases]] [[sweetheart from the ground-up|frequently]]. He feels the need to refer to people by their full names, plainly visible when he talks about himself, [[Clyde Cash]], or [[Adam Stackhouse]]. Other compulsive and repetitive behavior common with autism is strict following of rules, and near OCD like organization. Chris however, lives in a [[14 Branchland Court|filthy, unorganized house,]] makes comics with dialog bubbles in inappropriate places; and a very inconsistent plot, and disobeys the [[Chris and the law|law]] when it inconveniences him.

*Chris has an extremely narrow range of interests. He seems to only give a damn about video games, prowling for his next [[sweetheart]], his initials, and [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]], so much to the point where he practically places [[Sonichu (character)|him]] somewhere in everything he creates. He often wishes to [[dating|combine]] two [[LBP#First Date Level|interests]].

*Although he does not demonstrate any [[Honor Roll|competency]] with them, Chris has a fixation on numbers and statistics that would generally be irrelevant to others. He describes measures in concrete terms (e.g. "5 mies[sic] from the city"<ref>http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_0/Page_2</ref> instead of "outside the city"), and has a particular obsession with times and dates, timestamping nearly every scene in the comic and giving his characters birthdays that have no relevance to the plot (unless it becomes convenient to "[[pedofork|age up]]" the characters). Needless to say, Chris's tendency to blurt out exact dates and times (assuming he's not talking out of his ass) has made the job of [[CWChronology|CWCki chronologists]] much easier. On the other hand, his haphazard treatment of dates and times in the comic has led to countless [[continuity#Chronology|continuity errors]].

*Chris's given reasons for his love of [[My Little Pony]] are also indicative of autism. Autistics are drawn to physical sensations which give them a feeling of being 'grounded', and this is probably why Chris finds stroking the hair of these toys so "[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|therapeutic]]".

*Chris lacks social awareness. One notable instance, as revealed in the [[autism papers]], was when two [[Niggos|African American]] ladies were speaking to Chris about his love quest, when Chris politely told them that they could not be his girlfriend because they were not white. Based on the report of the examiner, Chris believed he was merely informing the ladies as to his prerequisites for a potential sweetheart while oblivious to the fact he was being racially insensitive.<ref>[[Autism_papers#IDENTIFYING_STATEMENT:]]</ref>

*Unnatural relationships with objects are also a sign of autism; Chris has an evident obsessions with his [[medallion]], his [[PS3]], and any number of other items that clutter up his [[Chris's room|room]]. Since autistic people have difficulty maintaining relationships with people they often end up becoming emotionally dependent on objects, though this symptom is seen much more in children with autism.

*Chris also appears to have echolalia, a common symptom of autism. This means that he constantly repeats phrases from his favorite television shows, movies and video games, regardless of whether they fit the current situation. In some instances, he calls this [[Random access humor|"humor"]].

*One of the biggest symptoms of autism Chris displays is his fear and resistance to change, well beyond the point that it could be even related to his autism. Chris is reluctant to get or even look for a job as he has only worked [[Chris's resume|four months in his entire life,]] has never come close to moving out, has a very hard time selling or giving up his toys or shirts, wouldn't stick to a diet and exercise program, [[attraction sign|doesn't try new ways to attract women,]] and has a very hard time coping with his banishment from [[the GAMe PLACe]]--where he would usually spend his Fridays. This might be resistance to change of his old life style of just going to school and coming home and playing video games, him trying to remain a child, or fear of failure. More than likely though this more to the fact that Chris is lazy, fat, selfish, naive, incompetent, refuses to grow up, and refuses to accept responsibility.

==Chris's misconceptions about autism==
It's not clear that Chris has any understanding of what, precisely, autism is, except that a) he has it, b) it's a bad thing, and c) he's a brave little boy for living with it. His song [[A-U-T-I-S-M]] sums up his attitudes about the disorder:

{{quote|A-U-T-I-S-M: what does it mean? Silence and friends unseen! A few brains as well: that is autism! And that makes us seem special to you!|Chris, attempting to spell out autism in more ways than one}}

To Chris, that's all it is — a condition that makes you a bit smarter than normal human beings and mysteriously makes people not want to be your friend.

Chris also seems to only be aware of the symptoms of autism that fit in with his odd, pseudo-Bohemian lifestyle. Asexuality is very common in autistic people; this is because any form of romance or sex is too intimate for an autistic mind to cope with. This completely contradicts Chris's "[[Love Quest]]" and suggests that he is actually trying to compensate for his inability to feel true sexual attraction, even if that means becoming a genuinely disturbing pervert.

Chris [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)|considers himself to have "Helped cultivate the First Generation of Autistic People",]] suggesting that he believes [[Chris and his Ego|the disorder did not even exist before he was born]].

In a [[May 2010]] [[Some Favored Comedians|video]], he stated that our society is spending so much time on the internet that ''everyone'' is becoming autistic.<ref>[[Toucher and Rich Segment#Chris's Response|Chris responds to Toucher and Rich, May 2009]]</ref><ref>[[Some Favored Comedians]]</ref> This further proves that people with little to no social contact shouldn't attempt social commentary.
That, and Chris has no fucking clue what his own disorder is actually ''like''. More recently he tried to use this excuse to guilt trip [[Jackie]] into being sorry for yelling at him, which worked as well as you'd expect.<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 23]]</ref>

===Chris on the causes of autism===
There's a broad scientific consensus that autism largely arises from genetic factors. Chris's own case is consistent with the theory that children born to older parents (Bob and Barb were 54 and 40, respectively, when Chris was conceived) are at greater risk of developing autism.<ref>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Causes_of_autism#Genetics</ref>

Chris's own expressed views on the root causes of autism are all over the map. He's espoused a few different theories at different times and in different situations. His oldest theory, dating back to the [[Song of Christian]] in the late 1990s, is that the [[abusive babysitter]] was responsible for his condition. In more recent years (specifically, during [[Mumble 3|his arguments with]] [[Clyde Cash]] in early 2009), he said that "scientifically speaking, [autism] has possibly come from a drug, or otherwise it may possibly be genetic", and that the babysitter incident merely "brought out the, uh, curse that was buried within me."

When explaining his condition to [[Father Call|Matt Devoria]] late in the fall of 2009, Chris insisted that autism has no genetic factors. In that instance, however he had an obvious agenda. He hoped to convince Matt that any children he fathered on Matt's daughter [[Kacey]] wouldn't wind up inheriting his condition; because of this, it's difficult to say exactly how sincere he happened to be at that moment.

To muddle the issue even ''further'', in [[Mailbag 12]], Chris blamed the cause of autism on a shot "the doctor's [sic] optionally give to the child after birth", apparently in reference to the highly disputed urban myth alleging that childhood vaccinations lead to autism. It's not likely that Chris even has that much of an awareness of the facts and assertions of said myth, and was probably looking for a throwaway excuse to deny any hereditary factors.

In his [[Autism Tutorial Part 1|Autism Tutorial]] from early 2011, Chris slewed back toward a more mainstream view, discussing the genetic factors behind autism and complaining about how his parents conceived him late in life. He also, however, warned viewers that smoking, drinking, or exposure to car exhaust could cause dangerous genetic damage that might result in autistic children.

===Chris versus Asperger syndrome===
{{see also|Asperger syndrome}}

Chris is easily outraged by any attempt to associate or confuse autism, high-functioning or otherwise, with Asperger syndrome, a similar condition now considered by many experts to overlap with HFA on the autistic spectrum. (In fact, it has been proposed that Asperger syndrome be placed on the autism spectrum in the new DSM-V, making both the condition and "high-functioning autism" one and the same.<ref>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DSM-V#Asperger_syndrome</ref>) At times, Chris has stated that he dislikes Asperger syndrome because sufferers of the disorder supposedly steal sympathy away from autism awareness. He has also claimed that the name is too close to "ass burger" or "ass booger" for his taste. In the early days of the CWCipedia Mailbag, asking Chris about Asperger syndrome was the most effective way to troll him; this culminated in the creation of [[Asperchu]].

In the present, Chris simply hates Asperger syndrome because it reminds him of how angry he got the last time someone brought it up - in other words, a completely unjustifiable opinion. Chris has declared himself "close-minded" on the subject, dismissing all scientific opinion contrary to his own, and angrily refuses to be convinced that he does not occupy a higher (in his eyes, superior) tier of the spectrum.

==Chris on autism education==
Chris is a firm believer in mainstream education for children with autism, a trait he doubtlessly picked up from his parents, who went to [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|incredible lengths]] to keep him in mainstream classrooms throughout his school years. Aside from speech therapy lessons intended to help him recover from his period of muteness as a child, as far as the available records indicate, Chris has never received any sort of special education geared towards dealing with his autism or related issues.

[[Mailbag 12|When asked for his advice on how to raise an autistic child]], Chris replied "...Most Importantly, MAINSTREAM; let your child be free to communicate and associate with the Normal Society. Special Education is okay, but that will not do in the longest run." Later, [[Mailbag 15|for advice on how "to succeed despite being afflicted with Asperger's"]], Chris's only response was, "My advice is to Mainstream the child."

During a [[04232010 - Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless|video from April 2010]], Chris read off a lengthy printout of autism-related information. After quoting a passage about how the education of autistic children should be undertaken by trained professionals in specialized settings, Chris offered his own opinion.

{{quote|As for me though, I highly recommend mainstreaming, lettin' 'em go though normal life. I mean yeah, give 'em the special treatment while they're young... but when you get 'em in elementary or middle school... or high school, mainstream is the way to go.|Chris, [[04232010 - Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless|Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless]]}}

In short, Chris believes that the approach that produced the man as we know him today (i.e. ignoring the problem) is [[List of Chris's lies|the best possible way to raise and educate children with autism.]]

==Autism cured?==

[[Image:454-CWCsPossibleFuture.JPG|thumb|Autism appears to be in Chris's future...]]

Chris's greatest dream is that his autism might one day be cured (although in 2006 he would have unhesitatingly sacrificed such a cure in order to obtain a [[PS3|PlayStation 3]]). There are instances of children inexplicably recovering from the symptoms, but there is no known cure for autism that can simply be applied to everyone like Chris's "homo vaccine." Imagine the surprise of the mental health community, then, when Chris revealed in [[March 2009]] that he had overcome his autism once and for all:<ref>[[Sarah Reveals Herself]]</ref>

:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' I'm not going to blame it on my autism; I have realized that I am over that now.
:'''Sarah May:''' Over what?
:'''Sarah May:''' Over your autism?
:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' yes
:'''Sarah May:''' . . .
:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' anyway, what is it that you want to do?
:'''Sarah May:''' Christian
:'''Sarah May:''' Are you serious?
:'''Sarah May:''' Autism is not influenza
:'''Sarah May:''' You don't 'get over it'
:'''Christopher C.W.C.:''' I've broken out of my autistic shell, and I am better able to socialize in public, with the past practices online.

Chris claims during the same chat that he may not be making sense due to a virus, easily allowing for him to retract this. Fortunately, Chris has discovered that [[stress]] is a more socially popular scapegoat for his personal shortcomings. Of course, people learn to manage stress, but what do you expect?

As of [[May 2009]], Chris seems to have regained his autism and is back to [[Chris on Wikipedia|blaming it]] for all his problems, seemingly believing that autism is as easy to shake/regain as the common flu.

[[November 2009]] saw Chris claiming to have cured his autism again as stated at the end of part 2 on his [[Sonichu Powerpoint]] presentations (where he describes himself as a "high-functioning autistic ''recovered''"). A [[December 2009|month later]], Chris says in the [[Chris chan (CWCipedia)|revised ED article]] in response to ED's claim he's "suffering" from autism, he comments "''which I still am for real.''"

Chris's flip-flopping self-diagnosis simply illustrates his misunderstanding of his problems. Since autism is his scapegoat for when he fucks up, to him that's really all it is — a disease that makes people fuck up all the time. Therefore, when he fails he has a bad case of autism, and when everything is going well (such as when he believes he has a girlfriend) he thinks the autism has gone away. What Chris really wants, then, is not a cure for autism but to live a life in which nothing happens that he would need to blame on his autism; that is, a life in which he has a girlfriend and nobody criticizes him.

==Things Chris has not blamed on his autism==
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif|What did you expect?]]

==Chris and other autistics==

Listening to Chris go on about "us TRUE and HONEST autistics", you might think he has some kind of misplaced sense of autistic solidarity. But this would merely be dumb, and Chris-chan always shoots for both dumb and repugnant, so in reality he doesn't give a shit about anyone's autism but his own. He calls lower-functioning autistics than himself "windows into hell"<ref>[[IRC (17 December 2008)]]</ref> and regards them with [[Chris and Hypocrisy|exactly the same kind of fear and mistrust he bitches about people treating him with]]. He has also expressed a disdain for others with high-functioning autism, with HFA being one of the characteristics excluding a woman from being a [[attraction sign|potential sweetheart]]. Meanwhile, he looks at people with [[Asperger Syndrome]], who are on roughly the same part of the spectrum as him, as dirty whores trying to somehow steal the limelight from "real" autistics (read: Chris).

Chris has only once included another autistic person in his comics. In emails with [[Sarah Jackson]], she told Chris that her sister was also a high-functioning autistic. When Sarah was included in [[Episode_19#Episode_19:_Date_Ed_.28Even_Though_the_Idea_Sounds_Dated.29|Episode 19]], so was her sister, [[Rita]]. When Rita was given dialogue after Sarah's [[death]], what she said made so little sense grammatically (even for [[Chris and writing|Chris's standards]]) that it is hard to see it as unintentional. It can be speculated from this that Chris, thinking his own autism so much better than anyone else's, was attempting to make Rita seem very unintelligent as he assumes other autistics and people with mental disorders are.

For their part, people with autism universally facepalm when they look at Chris, and wish he'd fuck off and die and stop giving them a bad name. The deleted article about Chris on TV Tropes said it best: they wish he'd Stop Being Stereotypical and embodying the worst perceptions of their condition. The article also noted that to people with autism or Asperger's, Chris was "Paranoia Fuel", that is to say it scares them to think they're like him. For the actual high-functioning autistics out there, Chris himself is the "window onto hell".

The Aspies for Freedom website has had a couple of run-ins with Chris that nicely demonstrate how other autistics regard him:

* [http://www.aspiesforfreedom.com/showthread.php?tid=14371 Aspies For Freedom thread] where Chris or someone impersonating Chris asks for help against [[ED]]. The aspies offer the usual advice of ignoring the [[trolls]], which by the way is the best advice.

* [http://www.aspiesforfreedom.com/showthread.php?tid=15676 Aspies For Freedom thread] where someone asks about Chris, but everyone else just wants to avoid the drama. A few of them realize that what ED says is true even though it may be a "hate site". Apparently, previous drama involving Chris led them to disable registration.

Tl;dr: Chris has no support in the online autistic community unless it's from someone who would rather he commit suicide.

== Sources ==
<references/>

==See also==
* [[Asperger syndrome]]
* [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)]]
* [[A-U-T-I-S-M]]
* [[Autism Tutorial]]
* [[Chris and psychology]]
* [[Kick the Autistic]]
* [[Slow-in-the-minds]]
* [[Stress]]

==External links==
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ix5Ith-fSU One Winged Autistic ]

{{CWC-isms}}
{{Love quest}}

[[Category:Autistic Spectrum Disorders]]
[[Category:Physical characteristics]]

May 2012

2012-05-15T11:51:12Z

Croatchu:

[[File:Chris FB Profile PIc (May 8th,2012).png|thumb|Chris in May 2012 (See also: [[wikipedia:Norman Bates |Norman Bates]], who also became his [[Barb|mother]]).]]

'''May [[2012]]''' kicked off with [[Chris]]' tentative return to the internet amidst more of his egotistical shenanigans. These were primarily centered around his apparent victory over the trolls. "Tricking" them by announcing the return of the [[attraction sign]] at the mall and then figuring he would rather stay home playing [[vidya]], has fueled the fires of his ego to the point of no return. It is worth noting that this month may be one of Chris' last before he is incarcerated following the events of [[28 October 2011]] if he is found guilty.

==Events==
[[Image:133627232947.png|thumb|left|Drawing of [[The Wallflower]].]]
[[Image:=3.jpg|thumb|right| Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Christian Weston Chandler: master of proportions. Note: [[Julay|People are watching them.]]]]
* 1 May: Chris posts another [[Facebook]] note, still gloating over him tricking the trolls over him being in the mall and reaffirms that he indeed lost his virginity, with an even stronger hint that it was a prostitute.
* 3 May:Chris changes his voicemail greetings, probably because the previous one sounded too [[Autistic |threatening]].
* 5 May: Chris posts a Facebook note in which he calls on the trolls to leave [[Anna]] alone and also says that he does see his mother in her. Additionally, an old drawing of Wallflower is released.
* 6 May: A previously unseen drawing of Chris and [[Jackie]] having sex in a pool is released and Chris changes his voicemail message once again.
[[File:Temporary note on chris' facebook.png|thumb| Chris claiming to have personal info of [[Daniel Mimms|Mimms]]]]
* 8 May: Chris changes his Facebook profile picture.
* 9 May; A misplaced call between Chris and Kacey is released.
* 12 May: Chris writes a new note on Facebook about Mimms in an attempt to get people to annoy him,he then deletes the note minutes later.
* 13 May: Several pictures of Chris are released, 5 from November 11th 2010, 3 others from March 1st 2011, and they feature Tomgirl Chris and predate the first set of tomgirl pictures.
{{collapsible
|The May 2012 Pictures
|<center>
<gallery>
File:133696094632.jpg|November picture 1
File:FZvAO.jpg|November picture 2
File:ZpkM1.jpg|November picture 3
File:ADlEp.jpg|November picture 4
File:VzDUm.jpg|November picture 5
File:RoD3b.jpg|March picture 1, featuring tomgirl chris.
File:ZyK7a.jpg|March picture 2
File:IiL3P.jpg|March picture 3
</gallery>
</center>
}}
{{Timeline}}

Chris and death

2012-05-04T12:04:23Z

Croatchu:

[[Image:PattiLuv.jpg|thumb|Rest in peace?]]
{{Quote|Sometimes I remember her, but I have moved on.|Chris on the late [[PandaHalo]].<ref>[[Regina e-mails]]</ref>}}

'''Death''' is a concept that Chris has a notably hard time understanding and/or coping with, be it the death of a human or an [[Patti Chandler|animal]], or even a [[Simonla Rosechu|fictional character]].

His poor reactions to death most likely come from Chris's lack of empathy, and childish thought patterns. Children often don't understand death, usually just thinking it's "like sleeping forever" or "just leaving." Chris, being a child inside, can only resort to these clumsy analogies to understand death.

Here are the departed souls, in order from earliest to latest:

==Deaths==
===Every single victim of the World Trade Center attacks (d. 2001)===
In the [[Twin Falling Towers]] video of 1 [[November 2009]], Chris makes fun of [[Clyde]] and says that he is as weak as the [[Wikipedia:World Trade Center|Twin Towers]]. He then shows the mouse cursor crashing into the buildings, complete with sound effects.

===[[Patti Chandler]] (1988-2006)===
Patti was Chris's pet dog, and she died in June 2006. Chris apparently drew a picture of a crying Sonichu face on the signature confirming the euthanasia process.<ref>[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Eulogy_for_Patti&diff=4455&oldid=4454 Eulogy for Patti] on the [[CWCipedia]]</ref> As seen in the image used in this article, Patti also appeared in the comic, immortalized as a furry character named [[Patti-Chan]]. This is particularly disturbing in that Chris has apparently decided to deny his dog the afterlife that he presumably believes in in favor of locking her in his own [[CWCville|personal hell]].

To Chris, her death is the greatest tragedy of his life, which he often compares to the deaths of other people's family members and loved ones. Not surprisingly, every single person he has said this to has become horribly offended. In [[Chris's Plea to Clyde Cash]], he equates Ryan Cash's death with Patti's, and in the [[Father Call]], he equates the death of Matthew Devoria's mother in the 9/11 attacks.

Oddly enough, Patti may have been the only being Chris ever cared about. On the one year anniversary of her death, Chris even broke down in tears and had to be consoled by his mother.<ref>[[Megan emails, Jan-July 2007#Chris is sad about Patti]]</ref> By comparison, the "death" of any Sweetheart will result in a few days of mourning at best.

It should be noted though that despite all of Chris's fondness for Patti, her memory was still not safe from being [[It's not that cold|defiled by him]].

===RocketFox's Dad (1966-2008)===
RocketFox's Dad used to be an [[alcohol]]ic, but recovered and stayed sober for ten years. However, his liver failed and he passed away in mid-October 2008. When RocketFox asked Chris for advice on how to cope, Chris considered it an "accident" and went on a spiel about how bad alcohol was.<ref>[[IRC (16 October 2008)]]</ref> This is actually the first death during the [[troll]]ing, and it was mentioned to Chris to see how he would react to such news, and as mentioned, Chris did so poorly. [[Ryan]]'s death and Chris's reaction cemented this.

===[[Sarah Jackson]] (1981-2008)===
A former heartsweet of Chris (and Decepticon) who was killed in a carefully executed plan by [[Optimus Prime]]. Sarah Jackson, like Patti, was used in his comic for a while as "Ms. Jackaras" in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]]. Unlike Patti, Ms. Jackaras gets the same fate as her non-comic counterpart, and is replaced by her sister, who continues the lesson anyway. None of the ''Sonichu'' characters mourn the loss of their professor.

===[[Ryan Cash]] (1996-2008)===
Ryan was Clyde's brother who was a huge fan of [[Sonichu]]. After the [[Sonichu (comic)|comics]] were delayed over and over, Ryan fell into a depression and committed suicide. Chris, of course, [[Captain's Log, Stardate December 28th, 2008|reacted to this]] in an inconsiderate manner, telling Clyde and his family to "just move on", and marveling at his power to incite suicide.

===[[PandaHalo]] (d. 2009?)===
Despite her being thousands of kilometers away from the bushfires, Chris assumed PandaHalo was dead. She is actually alive and kicking but Chris still doesn't know this. Two days after her "death," he went to find another sweetheart to [[Mass debating|mass debate]] to, saying "It's OK though, at least I have a [[Julie|good woman]] who's willing to be by my side at this point."<ref>[[Mumble 7#Summary]]</ref>.

Nine months later, [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]] featured a special "memorial" to PandaHalo and a sequence in which she dies (off-screen) in a building fire after saving her "Pokemon", [[Chloe Rosechu]] and [[Blazebob Sonichu]], so they wouldn't "burn with" her, not realizing that burning is an incredibly painful way to die.

More recently, Chris "dedicated" all of [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]] to PandaHalo's memory. This would be almost touching, if the alleged dedication didn't wholly consist of how awesome Chris was for using Panda's cover artwork.

===[[Sarah May]]===
After being called "[[Julie]]" multiple times, Sarah May attempted suicide over Mumble.<ref>[[Mumble 8]]</ref> Immediately after she went offline, rather than express any concern or try to find a way to stop her, Chris told Julie (who was also in the chat), "I still have you," with a completely emotionless "oh well" attitude. Julie was playing along with Chris, and did not react to Sarah's suicide attempt in any human-like fashion either; yet, it did not occur to Chris that Julie's behavior was ''in any way'' unnatural. Chris then made an [[CWC Shout Out to Sarah May|immature shout-out]] to her on a YouTube video, with tears faker than all his [[sweetheart]]s combined. The only reason he offered as to why she shouldn't commit suicide was that he would be sad without her.

===[[Aunt Corrina]] (1936-2009)===
Chris's aunt Corrina had her funeral on Chris's birthday, which was also [[wikipedia:Shrove Tuesday|Shrove Tuesday]], a Christian holiday that involves eating pancakes. Needless to say, Chris cared more about the pancakes than the funeral of his own aunt.

When the "I know how to be sad because my dog died" excuse fails, Chris usually follows up with an offhand mention of his Aunt Corrina. If that fails, the deaths of his many sweethearts tends to follow.

===[[Clyde Cash]] (1976-2009)===
In early [[2009]], Christian seemed to be aware that Clyde Cash was supposedly dead, though he was suspicious of the idea. Regardless, he [[curse-ye-ha-me-ha|cursed]] Clyde in [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 18th, 2009]], just in case.

===[[BILLY MAYS]] (1958-2009)===
In the video [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 1st, 2009]], Chris only seems to be upset over people blaming him for MAYS's death, and loudly denies that BILLY had ever been the mayor of [[CWCville]]. He doesn't even offer his condolences to MAYS's family. Down the line, Chris selfishly adopts the idea that MAYS was in fact his bodyguard and he died protecting Chris.

In ''Sonichu'' #9, Chris slaps in a one-page intro with BILLY saying that he was never was the Mayor, but was part of Chris's group. At the bottom was a message from Chris, asking him to "come back soon."

===[[Ivy]] (1992-2009)===
Ivy committed suicide after not being allowed to see Chris. Chris uploaded the [[CWC "Boyfriend"]] video as a memorial. Yes, a poorly sung remake of Avril Lavigne's happy, bouncy pop/punk song, with lyrics changed to be about how much Chris would like women to date him. Chris included pictures of several past sweethearts in the video, making it less of a tribute to Ivy and more of a monument to Chris's failures.

Furthermore, as is unquestionably appropriate, Ivy's tragic demise was incorporated into issue #9. Rather than admit to having a hand in her suicide, Chris conjures up a magnificently gruesome accidental death, which involved having gotten her neck broken with elevator wires after falling through the elevator floor. Although this is a particularly troubling manipulation of what really happened, Chris more than makes up for it with gravitas; he gracefully, albeit belatedly, offers a tiny orange box in memory to Ivy 'O'Niel', taking pride of place underneath a backshot of [[Slaweel]] and some weird faux-[[Transformers]] actions. All of the above shows the leaps and bounds Chris has made in his appropriate handling of tragic deaths.

When confronted about this insanity in the [[Mailbag]], Chris got quite indignant, demanding to know what the questioner thought he should have done, since Ivy had died in real life and could no longer serve as Chris's [[GodJesus|God-given sweetheart]]. It's not clear whether it had ever crossed Chris's mind to keep this horrific death out of the pages of what is supposedly a comic aimed at children, or to let Ivy's character live on in CWCville like he had done for Patti and BILLY.

===[[Wikipedia:Mary Jo Kopechne|Mary Jo]] (d. 2009)===
In a [[Mailbag 27#Love and loss|mailbag]], Chris was asked by a [[Wikipedia:Ted Kennedy|troubled fan]] what he should do after the death of his beloved Mary Jo.

{{quote|Mary Jo is gone (I feel for you), but you should move on and try to find another woman who will treat you about as good, or possibly better than, her. Suck it up, and move on like a Man would. I tell you as a Man who had to do the same thing a few times in the past too.|Chris, being super-sensitive.}}

Chris clearly states how he believes a death should be approached by a man (which includes finding another woman right away and a specific lack of grieving), and tells the traumatized fan that he should simply move onto a better woman since his girlfriend's death, not only being completely asinine, but also outlining that he believes women to be [[women's rights|replaceable and possibly interchangeable]].
[[Image:RIP mike.JPG|thumb|The obituary that Chris didn't even bother to read.]]

===Mike Jackson (1969-2010)===

Throughout [[January 2010]], a man named Mike Jackson sent Chris a series of friendly letters asking for advice, and then begging for help after Chris's amazingly bad advice completely ruined his life. Chris, caring soul that he is, promised the absolute minimum amount of effort (a [[YouTube]] video) and then never made good on his word.

Distraught over Chris's total lack of action, and terrified at the risk of having his family torn to pieces, Mike [[Mailbag 52#This, if anything, requires a canned response|died from a sleeping pill overdose]]. Mike's grieving widow generously decided to let Chris view the private obituary page set up for friends and family of the deceased, saying that Mike would have wanted her to treat Chris with respect and decency.

Chris responded to the news of Mike's death with the same copy-pasted bullshit he used to pretend he was listening to criticism. The two infamous sentences made no sense in context and demonstrated beyond the shadow of a doubt that Chris could not care less about Mike's tragic death. It was revealed in [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 8]] that Chris didn't even view Mike's obituary page, and his [[Mailbag 56#In which Chris isn't sorry at all|response]] to Mike's grieving son was all of three words long.

===Simonla Rosechu===
[[Image:SandyRosechu.jpg|80px|right|thumb|The bastard child in question.]]
During the [[Asperchu]] saga, a recurring theme was [[Evan]]'s legal claims in regard to [[Simonla]] as a derivative of his character, [[Simonchu]]. While early demands were for Chris to edit his old strips to remove Simonla entirely from continuity, later Evan consented to letting Chris keep Simonla's early appearances, on the grounds that he kill her at a later date. Chris, not surprisingly, totally lost his shit, showing a much stronger emotional attachment to an empty, one-dimensional fictional character than he has managed for any living creature other than his dog. Finally, after being faced with the threat of legal action, Chris finally killed Simonla in issue #10, though not before she laid an egg out of wedlock with her baby-daddy [[Wild]] (though, of course, the act of laying the egg was never shown, or even mentioned), which hatched into [[Sandy Rosechu]].

It should be noted that, as revealed in the [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Calls]], Chris considers cartoon characters to be real, living creatures that exist in some other world reminiscent of Toon Town from ''[[Wikipedia:Who Framed Roger Rabbit|Who Framed Roger Rabbit]]''. Simonla's death was as real to him as that of any of his family members or sweethearts... perhaps even more so.

===[[Chandler Cats#Desi|Desi]] and [[Chandler Cats#Skittles|Skittles]] Chandler (precise date of deaths unknown; no later than 10 April 2010)===

In an email Chris sent to [[Jackie]], he [[Jackie E-mails#Chris is lazy, Hates simple chores|mentions having three cats]] (Lucy, Kitty and Scamper), despite the fact that he was previously known to have had two additional cats (Desi and Skittles). This suggests that by the time of the correspondence both had died, or had at least departed from [[14 Branchland Court]] in some other way. No documentation exists of Chris's reaction to their loss.

===[[Wikipedia:Murder of Yeardley Love|Yeardley Love]] (1987-2010)===
Yeardley Love was a lacrosse player for [[UVA]] who was murdered. Chris uploaded a [[05142010|video]] discussing the story (which he probably just saw on TV for a few minutes), but didn't even bother to say her name. He also stated that the murderer should get 20 years in prison for the shock of the murder, which is twice his desired punishment for smoking. Later in the video, [[Chris and His Ego|he rerouted the subject towards himself]] and stated how everyone needed to be sympathetic of him and his autism and that he's not a bad man. In other words, he used the death of a girl he never knew in an attempt to make himself look good.

===[[Robert Franklin Chandler Jr.]] (1927-2011)===
After a long battle with cancer, Bob's life came to an end while he was being hospitalized in the [[wikipedia:Martha Jefferson Hospital|Martha Jefferson Hospital]]'s ICU.<ref>http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/dailyprogress/obituary.aspx?n=robert-franklin-chandler&pid=153539600</ref> Chris's reaction to his father's death remains to be seen; however, as he spent his father's last days [[Calling Out|gloating over Internet trolls]], his [[28_October_2011|actions]] [[Robee_Sonee_and_the_Tomgirls|after Bob's death]] may not reflect well on our hero.

In a March 31 Facebook message, Chris expressed a desire for Bob's ghost to haunt the dreams of anyone who doesn't like him, putting him on the exact same level as his dead dog. While this was an understandable reaction to discovering "plans" that trolls were going to dig her up, or discovering a webcomic that contained what he considered a mockery of her memory, his threat to send Bob's ghost after people is equal parts disrespectful and unreasonable.

===Chris himself (1982-)===
Given Chris's notoriously [[Obesity|bad diet]], lack of [[Chris and Health|activity]] and general lack of [[Fuck Quest|motivation]] or [[Chris and Remorse|concern]] for anything other than [[Chris and his Ego|himself]], it is generally considered unlikely that Chris will live very far into his forties should he persist in his current lifestyle.

However, there is a likelihood that like [[Bob]], who had suffered from (and eventually passed away as a result of) [[Heart level|heart]] failure and [[alcohol]]ism, he may be genetically dispositioned to lead a long, albeit miserable, life. In comparison though, Chris's own death is naturally [[Chris and his Ego|the only one that immediately concerns him]], since it would be the only thing that would put an end to his [[Love Quest]] once and for all.

Chris once mentioned that he had been receiving [[Dreams|recurring visions]] of himself walking into a bright light, which he one day hoped would be prevented from appearing by getting a [[sweetheart]]. However, judging by how unlikely it is that he will ever enter any meaningful relationship with someone willing to put up with him and his numerous faults, these visions will most likely persist until the inevitable day it comes true.

===Various ancestors===
Chris claimed that, at Aunt Corrina's funeral, his ancestors wished him a safe [[Ohio trip|trip to Ohio]] to meet Julie.<ref>[[Jackie Chat 7]]</ref>

==See also==
*[[Autism]]
*[[White_knight#Chris_lacks_empathy_himself|Lack of empathy]]
*[[Death threats]]

==References==
<references />

{{Chris and}}

[[Category:Dead]]

Chris and health

2012-05-02T20:59:27Z

Croatchu:

{{quote|Eat less cow meat; Grilled Chicken is healthier. [[Pickle|Vegetables]] and Fruit are a must; Walking or [[Father Call|Jogging]] is great exercise daily. Standing helps too; play some ''[[Guitar Hero]]'' on [[Gitar of Fail|Guitar]], you have to stand while playing, and move a bit for fun and movement.|Chris's [[Chris and Hypocrisy|ironic]] advice for [[Wikipedia:Ivan Drago|Ivan Drago]]<ref>http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Mailbag_2</ref>}}

[[Image:DecayOfManChild.jpg|thumb|Chris in a few years.]]
[[Chris]], as even those with a cursory knowledge of medicine could plainly see, is not in good '''health'''. Considering his [[obesity]], lack of exercise, poor nutrition, refusal to bathe, and the grave disrepair/uncleanliness of his [[14 Branchland Court|surroundings]], he has an extremely high chance of developing potentially life threatening medical problems such as cancer, type 2 diabetes and [[Wikipedia:Atherosclerosis|atherosclerosis]].

==Nutrition==
{{main|Obesity}}
[[Image:Ecp00065.jpg|thumb|left|Christian Weston Chandler is not a very healthy individual in any sense of the word]]
[[File:Recycle.jpg|thumb|Chris tends to drink large amounts of soft drinks daily.]]
Chris is a known fast food lover, eating either [[McDonald's]] or [[Burger King]] at least once a day. He has been known to dine out up to four times a day. The fact that he's merely fat and not morbidly obese with such an awe-inspiring calorific intake and inactive lifestyle suggests a fairly high metabolism, one which will almost certainly not last indefinitely.

Chris claims that he cooks for himself 4 or 5 days a week,<ref>[[Mumble 6]]</ref> making his cooking a major source of his nutrition. He has said that he took home-ec classes in school and that he owns cook books.<ref>[[IRC (18 December 2008)]]</ref> However, when Jackie asked him to cook spaghetti in a YouTube video (an incredibly basic dish), he dodged responsibility by claiming that [[Barbara]] had blocked the kitchen up with junk, so he instead made microwaved spaghetti and meatballs.<ref>[[SpaghettiRoutine]]</ref> It can be deduced from this that Chris can't or doesn't cook, and simply buys microwavable meals every time he claims to be eating at home.

Many, many times, Chris has been shown to be a glutton for all kinds of food, eating excessively in public places and during parties. His complexion also gives insight into his daily nutrition, often showing various signs of acne and acne scarring. This suggests that Chris never drinks water, and that he drinks a lot of [[CWC Cola|carbonated]] [[Coca-Cola|drinks]] and energy drinks (which have been proven to increase erratic behavior). His most probable nutritional intake is as follows:

* Breakfast: Usually nothing because he usually [[Biological clock|sleeps from 6 a.m. to noon]], but on the rare occasion he does eat McDonald's, or some other fast food restaurant with breakfast options.
* Lunch: Something quick at home or fast food.
* Dinner: Eat out with family (fast food) or poorly-cooked/microwave meal.

In addition, it is believed that Chris's diet is one of the causes for his [[Dirty crapped briefs|fecal incontinence]] (the other one being [[Homos#Evidence that Chris is a homo|ramming stuff in his rectum]]), as chronic constipation can be one cause of fecal incontinence;<ref>[[Wikipedia:Fecal_incontinence#Constipation|Fecal incontinence on Wikipedia]]</ref> casually, it happens that Chris's diet of McDonald's, microwaveable food, and little or no vegetables or fruit is very likely ridiculously low on fiber and thus a sure-fire way of causing constipation, and Chris has been going on with this diet for who knows how many years.

According to Chris, he eats more vegetables than any other foods of any other food group.<ref>[[Kacey Call 7]]</ref> The veracity of this statement is dubious, given what is known about Chris's medical history and health in general.

In short, Chris is a fatty, he denies it, and his food makes him shit himself.

It seems that his diet has finally caught up with him, as it was revealed in the [[Father Call|conversation]] with [[Kacey]]'s father that Chris's doctor has prescribed him [[Wikipedia:Atorvastatin|Lipitor]] for his high cholesterol. Chris claims that he stopped taking the drug in the fall of [[2009]], but whether he was being honest (especially given the number of obvious [[lies]] he told about his health in the course of the rest of the conversation) is uncertain.

===Places where Chris likes to eat===
* [[Country Cookin]]
* [[McDonalds]]
* [[Golden Corral]] (Has closed its doors in Charlottesville)
* [[Chick-fil-A]]
* [[Semen|Bedroom]]

==Exercise==

<center>{{#ev:youtube|c7BcDvftwhI}}</center>

{{quote|[…] while my body is [[I AM STRONG|Strong]] and [[Power]]ful, I am unable to Run Fast without losing breath 10-Seconds in [[Sonic]]-Running Speed.|[[CWCipedia]]<ref>http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Private_villa_of_corrupted_citizens#I_DO.21</ref>}}

Chris has not had any regular exercise since leaving [[Manchester High School|high school]], and the lack of physical activity has contributed to his already ballooning shape. Since he barely leaves his house and focuses his time on playing [[video games]], his lack of exposure to the sunlight has left his skin a frightening pallor that starkly contrasts to the dark background of his room, while making videos. Also, most fat people have strong, stocky legs, due to carrying around all that weight, but since Chris very rarely performs any task more physically demanding than [[Guitar Hero|standing up]], his muscles have withered away, leaving a body made almost entirely out of fat, as evidenced by his incredibly thin and weak arms [[Sign Destruction Video|that are incapable of breaking wooden sticks]] and [[Chris Loses It|barely capable of tearing cardboard]].

When questioned about exercise, he regarded standing up and playing ''[[Guitar Hero]]'' as exercise.<ref>[[IRC (03 January 2009)]]</ref> Needless to say, Chris is clearly delusional. In Chris's [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|''PaRappa'' contest entry]], where he foolishly chose to dance, he seemed to get tired very easily from dancing for a mere thirty seconds and even stopped recording to take a break (evidenced by the abrupt change of position). While attending [[Fridays After Five]] for a while, he danced in public like a stroke victim, then sat down to rest and play some vidya outdoors.

During the later stages of his infatuation with [[Kacey]], many of Chris's videos showed a growing obsession with his own physical power. Chris apparently believes himself to be a nigh-unstoppable testament to human might, and has made several videos dedicated to [[I AM STRONG|flexing]] and [[30 Push-Ups|feats]] of [[11042009 51 50|strength]], performing Herculean tasks such as lifting boxes of lemonade and almost doing fake push-ups. He appears to believe that he could defeat both his rivals [[Gregg Mays]] and [[Liquid Chris]] should it to come to blows, and as such has challenged them to fisticuffs multiple times.

Of course, Chris is once again completely delusional about his own abilities. The push-ups and curls he has struggled to do on camera only serve to demonstrate exactly how hopelessly out of shape he really is. He's so fat and his muscles are so small that it's never clear whether he's actually flexing, and the [[CWCFighter|fighting]] [[Challenge for Clyde|moves]] he's shown us are laughably incompetent. Were Chris to get his wish and physically confront Gregg or Liquid, he would definitely have his ass handed to him.

In the [[Father Call]] and the subsequent [[Kacey and Liquid Call]], Chris made various claims about having taken up jogging. At one point he claimed to jog five miles (8 km) a day, but it didn't take long for Kacey and her father to call him out on this obvious lie. The truth is clearly shown in the video [[Sonichu's Edge]], where Chris runs only a fraction of a mile and had to take six breaks to catch his breath, whereas with a person in decent health would take a few seconds to jog the same distance without having to stop as often as Chris did.
{{clear}}

==Hygiene==
{{quote|I shower Daily.|Chris<ref>[http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Sonichu#C.W.C._Gets_A_Big_Power.21 http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Sonichu#C.W.C._Gets_A_Big_Power.21]</ref>}}
[[Image:Didyoubathe.JPG|thumb|right|180px|Did you bathe? *SPOILER* No]][[Image:Plusoneshoweroffilth.jpg‎|thumb|left|Where Chris marinates in his own filth.]]

Chris's hygiene is perhaps his worst quality. Many times has Chris regarded [[Axe]] as a substitute for a shower. According to [[Emily]], he reeked of "rotten watermelons"; [[Robert Simmons V]] said that he had a variant of the homeless person stank, and field agents have said "body odor masked with gallons of Axe". Chris compounds this problem by frequently going for days without changing his clothes; perusal of his videos has shown him wearing the same shirt for as long as a week at a stretch. The condition of his epidermal system is so poor that it's visibly noticeable, even in his low quality videos. The texture of grease that is probably permanently adhered to his skin creates a disgusting sheen that reflects a significant amount of light. The same goes for his hair, which is in such poor condition that when he allowed it to grow for the [[Tomgirl Pictures]], many strands were clumped together in greasy, sticky locks, looking akin to the long beard of a homeless man.

Unless being immersed in his surroundings for so long has destroyed his ability to note his foul vapors, it's a marvel that Chris refuses to indulge in basic hygienic activities such as bathing or showering, even if briefly. Most likely, it's because time spent in the shower is time not spent playing video games or stalking young ladies. If he showered regularly, his -45% chance of finding a [[boyfriend-free girl]] would erupt all the way up to 0%.

Despite his irregular (at best) use of the shower, Chris is reportedly an enthusiastic consumer of hand sanitizer. [[Mimms]] and [[Lucas]] recalled that he would scrub his hands with germ-killing jellied alcohol after every post-card-game handshake at [[the GAMe PLACe]], and photographs of Chris at [[Fridays After Five]] suggest that he kept a bottle on hand at all times. Additionally, Mimms and Lucas said in their [[Mimms and Lucas Q&A|Q&A session]] that Chris didn't have any noticeable BO during his time at the GAMe PLACe, suggesting that his odor problems have become more severe in recent years.

{{clear}}

==Vision==
As evidenced by his oversized, [[Pedo-Glasses|aviator-like glasses]], Chris has a vision problem. Judging by pictures of Chris in his youth, it appears that he began wearing glasses around the time he entered [[Manchester High School|high school]]. However, in the twenty-something years he has been wearing the glasses, they have done nothing to correct his eyesight. The extent of his eyesight problems is anybody's guess. Nobody will know, as Chris prefers to use his [[monthly tugboat]] on vidya games rather than on [[Chris and reality|getting his eyes checked]] or perhaps [[Chris and Fashion|wearing the appropriate-sized glasses for his prescription]]. His glasses are often fogged and [[dirty crapped briefs|dirty]], which will not help to correct his vision. It is possible that Chris's glasses are only for reading, as Chris often takes them off when things are [[Stress|"getting serious"]], but keeps them on to [[Chris and English|read]]. This is evident in the video in which he [[Captain's_Log,_Stardate_February_10th,_2009|reads a letter from Nintendo]], and in the [[Christian_Weston_Chandler's_FUTURE_MESSAGE|"FUTURE MESSAGE"]] video.

One of Chris' relatives, Dr. David Alan Chandler, happens to be an eye doctor whom Chris has seen in the past. The last time Chris was known to have seen him for an appointment was 6 January 2004.

Chris's driver's license has a restrictive condition checked, which commonly means that the driver must wear glasses in order to legally drive (it could also have something to do with the fact that Chris is [[Autism|disabled]], however, his disability seemingly does not affect his driving abilities). Whether his vision contributed to the [[Sonchu#Car_trouble|numerous vehicular incidents]] he has been involved in has yet to be seen. However, it is a good bet that Chris should be wearing glasses while driving, for the sake of those sharing the road with him.

==Dental health==
[[Image:ChrisCavities.JPG‎|thumb|right|He's not even afraid to show the gaping cavities at the back of his mouth. Now that's [[honest content]]!]]
Chris's fondness for baring his [[fangs]] in moments of [[Chris and anger|tard rage]] has revealed substantial dental work, particularly on his back molars, which look to have had most of their surface drilled and filled to deal with cavities. It seems likely that Chris takes about as much care of his teeth as he does any other part of his body, and that he'll be needing crowns and other painful, expensive dental surgery some time later in his life, assuming he lives that long.

Although it is difficult to tell, in the few instances we get to see his teeth, they seem to be a strange yellow-brown color, which is likely the result of large consumption of [[My Coke Rewards|carbonated drinks]], poor dental hygiene, and his refusal to visit a professional under the influence of his massive [[Chris and his ego|narcissism]].
{{clear}}

==Mental health==

[[Chris and psychology|As noted]], Chris has a hostile relationship with psychotherapy, so there is little that can be said about what mental illnesses he has. Because autism isn't nearly enough to explain the full spectrum of his abject psyche, many observers have tried to pin down Chris for a variety of mental illnesses ranging from sociopathy (minus the increase in charisma) to narcissism (ditto). Chris is so very, very screwed up that it's impossible to tell if he's really mentally ill or just that much of a waste of space.

The one mental failing that debilitates Chris most, even more than his autism, is his rigid refusal to adapt to his environment. This stubbornness, more than anything else, is what makes him such a frustrating failure of a human being—he refuses to advance mentally beyond the mind of a ten-year-old with some ''[[Wikipedia:Playboy|Playboy]]'' magazines stuffed under his mattress. Whatever mental problems he may have are only exacerbated by this stubborn inability to mature or even alter his tactics.

His social awkwardness, narcissism, and several other unwanted traits trace back to his inept parents, who spoil him and tell him life will be all sugar and [[rainbow]]s. It is quite possible that Chris doesn't feel like his life has truly begun, that he is still in the "pre-adult" years—this could be related to Chris still being a [[virgin]], and a possible belief, subconscious or otherwise, that he isn't able to truly be an adult until he has sex. Since Chris has been pampered and sheltered from basically all forms of outside influence, he lacks experience with the real world, as well as basic feelings such as empathy, sympathy and humility. His reaction to the real world can best be seen in his reactions to trolls; instead of dealing with them in a constructive way (taking their advice) or even a neutral way (either ignoring them or getting off the internets), he will freak out, yell at things, blame his autism for his shortcomings, and maybe crush a [[dildo]].

He also has a peculiar notion that he is slim, broad-shouldered and tan, and that he has a full head of [[hair]] and is generally not creepy. This image comes from two things:

* His mother would always [[Barbara#Pampering_of_Chris|tell him how "handsome" he was]]. This might simply be [[Barbara]] telling her son what all mothers tell their kids.
* He has an [[Wikipedia:Prosopagnosia|inability to remember faces]]. For example, during the [[Blanca]] incidents, trolls used pictures of two different girls to represent Blanca and he never suspected a thing; he thinks that he and [[BILLY MAYS]] would have looked the same if BILLY shaved off his beard. In [[high school]], he had to remember his own appearance by staring in the mirror, leaving his more youthful image of himself branded in his mind.<ref>[http://cogsdev.110mb.com/sonichu/SchuComic8Page24.jpg ''Sonichu'' #7, page 24]</ref> The fact that the only distinguishing features of his cartoon characters are hair and eye color also point to this, although this may just be Chris being a [[Chris and art|shitty artist]].

Many people think that, far from being mentally ill, Chris is just misguided and simply needs to be steered in the right direction. [[White knight|However…]]

==Sexual health==
Bent at a horrifying 45° angle, Chris's [[duck]] is a thing of almost unholy terror. While there has been much speculation as to the cause of this (possibly [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peyronie%27s_disease Peyronie's disease]), it is ultimately a mystery that will probably never be solved. While correctable, the process is expensive and Chris has other, more important, things on which to spend his (or rather, [[Monthly tugboat|taxpayers']]) money.

In correspondence with [[Jackie]], Chris revealed he was checked for STDs in early [[2010]].<ref>[[Jackie e-mails]]</ref>

:'''SPOILER ALERT:''' He doesn't have any for [[virgin with rage|obvious reasons]].

==Other deformities==
[[Image:Eye.jpg|thumb|"My left eye is blue, and my right eye is brown-my right is green."<ref>[[CWC Update 13 August 2009]]</ref>]]
Chris also has mild [[heterochromia]], which he claims is the result of pinkeye medicine that he took in high school. However, in a photo of a young Chris, his right eye is green.<ref>[[:Image:0043-YoungChristopher2.jpg]]</ref> He probably tells this story so people think he's [[Autism|special]].

His voice is also a very [[speech Impediment|severe deformity]], ranging in pitch from normal to the sound of a three-year old girl on helium all the way to [[Wikipedia:Gilbert Gottfried|Gilbert Gottfried]]. It has been medically proven that one of the effects of [[Asperger's syndrome]] is a lack of variation in speech such as tone, pitch and accent. It can also work backwards, which could explain Chris's far from normal voice: autistics often have difficulty distinguishing voice tone. In his [[Song of Christian]] video, his voice sounds almost entirely normal, except for the occasional times where he recalls [[Wikipedia:List_of_Conker_characters#Conker_the_Squirrel|Conker]] of ''[[Wikipedia:Conker's Bad Fur Day|Conker's Bad Fur Day]]''. However, this voice deformity most likely comes from the fact he has little to no human interaction; such isolation has been proven to change a person's perception of pitch, especially if they're autistic. With enough isolation, this will most likely become permanent.

[[/cwc/|Some]] have pointed out that Chris has an unusually wide [[wikipedia:Nasal septum|septum]], as seen in his [[MySpace]] picture.<ref>[[:File:Myspace.jpg]]</ref> Others go as far as to say he lacks one altogether. The cause of this, like his bent [[duck]], is as yet unknown.

==See also==
*[[Autism]]
*[[Obesity]]

== Sources ==
<references/>
{{Chris and}}

2013

2012-05-02T19:27:06Z

Croatchu:

'''2013''' is the year after [[2012]].

==Scheduled events==
*24 February 2013 - Chris [[Chris's birthday|turns 31]] (see: [[Chris and Health|wishful thinking]]).
*1 October - [[Barbara]]'s 72nd birthday.

== Sources ==
<references/>

{{Timeline}}
[[Category:Chronology]]

Love Quest

2012-04-27T22:47:26Z

Croatchu:

{{quote|I DO NOT KNOW WHY I would expect ANY woman to be Attracted to me, IN PUBLIC...|Chris, in a [[White knight e-mails#September 2008 — Chris denies being fat and sexist|sudden moment of clarity]]<ref>[[White_knight_E-mails#September_2008_.E2.80.9]]</ref>.}}

{{quote|... except for the fact that I am Handsome|You know what? Fuck it.}}

[[Image:Chris-Chan Warrior of Love.jpg|thumb|How Chris views himself.]]
[[File:461-AutismFight.jpg|thumb|Chris must fight [[autism]] in order to enter the Valley of [[China]].]]
[[Image:Christever Alone.png|thumb|Accurate depiction of Chris.]]

The '''Love Quest''' or '''Sweetheart Search'''<ref>[[Common Questions]]</ref><ref>[[Lori Lopez]]</ref><ref>[[Miyamoto emails]]</ref> is the ongoing, real-life [[saga]] of [[Christian Weston Chandler]] to obtain a girlfriend. The stated purpose of the Love Quest is to meet the woman who will be his true love, solve all his problems and bear his children. However, Chris believes all of this will be assured upon his first successful [[Chris and sex|sexual intercourse]] with a woman, and so for all practical purposes the true goal is to lose his virginity.

Chris is known to have had crushes on girls prior to [[2002]], but the Love Quest represents a focused effort to do everything in his power to achieve romantic fulfillment, except improve himself. He has often linked the Love Quest with what he claims to be visions from [[GodJesus]] commanding him to father [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|a daughter]], as well as his desire to prove that he is straight; at times these seem to be the only actual reasons Chris wants a lover.

To this day, the Love Quest is ongoing, with Chris (unsurprisingly) not having made any progress whatsoever in finding a romantic partner. He has [[Facebook|claimed]] to have enjoyed partial success to the extent of losing his virginity. However, as with other [[Honor roll|achievements Chris claims to possess]], it is still the subject of debate.
==Origins==
===Background===
[[Image:104-GirlfriendAttract.jpg|thumb|right|Spell cards don't work IRL, Chris.]]
The catalyst for the Love Quest was Christian's encounter with [[Sarah Hammer]] during his move back to [[Ruckersville]], and enrollment at the [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]]. This occurred somewhere between [[2000#June|June 2000]] and [[2003#October|October 2003]].

Sarah is presumably the first woman to tell the ever-[[naïve]] Christian, "[[So Need a Cute Girl|I have a boyfriend]]." Chris unexpectedly learned that his childhood [[gal-pal]] was romantically involved with [[Wes Iseli]].<ref>[[Story of My Current Days]]</ref> Upon making this discovery, he quickly developed an intense jealousy of Iseli and resentment towards him that would set his state of mind for the impending Quest.

Throughout [[2003]], Chris passively expressed his mix of longing and disappointment by way of "[[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares]]" and "[[BFF's (Best Friends Forever)]]". It is clear that Chris had at some point decided Sarah was supposed to be his soulmate (although perhaps not until he learned she was unavailable) and had difficulty accepting that this would not be a possibility. In [[2005]], following Sarah's breakup with Iseli and hookup with [[William Spicer]], he dealt with the situation more openly and publicly in [[Sonichu 2|''Sonichu'' #2]]. (This acceptance perhaps stemmed from his turn to a new object of infatuation - see the [[Megan]] section below.)

===Epiphany===
According to Chris, the genesis of the Love Quest was his twenty-first birthday, 24 February [[2003]].<ref>Chris misspoke the year as [[2002]] in [[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007|this video]], but he has elsewhere consistently referenced his 21st birthday, which was in 2003.</ref> On this date, he was kicked out of his [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|college]] English class after a dispute with his teacher. (In his [[User:ChrisChanSonichu_profile#Start_of_my_Sweetheart_Search|Wikipedia biography]], Chris claimed the teacher ejected him simply on account of his [[autism]], when asked about it again later by a "girlfriend", he does add that it may have had something to do with some remarks he made about fellow classmates and non-white people<ref>[[Jackie Chat 5]], starting at 7:45 PM</ref>). While waiting for his next class, Chris sat and cried his eyes out, realizing there was no one to comfort him like when he cried at his [[Manchester High School#Graduation|graduation]]. Shortly thereafter, he resolved that he needed a girlfriend.<ref>[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile#Start of my Sweetheart Search]]</ref>

Presumably the connection between these events is that Chris felt hurt and ostracized by his punishment, leading him to recognize his need for someone who would appreciate him unconditionally. However, Chris further states that the Love Quest ''officially'' began in [[2003#August|August 2003]]<ref>[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile#Enter the Wicked Witch of the Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens]]</ref>, suggesting that he waited six months to actually execute his plans out of sheer laziness.

===Salad days===
At some point early on in the Quest, Chris developed an intense, socially crippling [[Noviophobia|fear]] that all women have boyfriends. Since his [[autism]] causes him to approach social tasks in the bluntest manner possible, it can be assumed that his initial approach was to walk up to women cold, and frankly ask if they would go out with him. It may be further inferred that Chris's unrelenting persistence made it extremely difficult for a woman he liked to get rid of him, short of claiming to have a boyfriend. In any case, Chris quickly lost nearly all of his confidence in talking to women and developed an irrational hatred of boyfriends, or "[[JERKS]]" (i.e., all men everywhere except himself and his [[Bob Chandler|father]]). Since this time, he has always specified that his potential girlfriend must be a [[boyfriend-free girl]] (sometimes "single, boyfriend-free girl"), as if this were not already obvious.

==Conflict with Mary Lee Walsh==
[[Image:136-LoveSearchItems.jpg|thumb|Miscellaneous items used during the Love Quest, or as the Commonwealth of Virginia will eventually call it, Exhibit A.]]
[[Image:134-cwcsonstecrdgirlbck.jpg|thumb|Back of a ''Sonichu'' business card.]]
{{main|Mary Lee Walsh}}

By [[October 2003]], Chris had put into practice what was "the only sensible idea I could come up with that was inexpensive": sitting on the [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|PVCC]] campus holding a sign that read "I am a 21-Year Old Male, seeking an 18-21-Year Old Single Female Companion." This would be the first of many versions of the [[Attraction Sign]], a vital tool in the Love Quest for several years to come.

Sometime during October, the school's Dean of Student Services, [[Mary Lee Walsh]], confronted Chris and confiscated his sign. According to Chris's recollection of the event:

{{quote|Then in Mid-October, the Quote/Unquote "Dean of Student Services", Mary Lee Walsh, approached me and pulled my sign away from me and told me, "You're NOT ALLOWED TO FIND TRUE LOVE HERE." [[Heart level|MY HEART WAS SHATTERED]] that very moment.|CWC's [[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile#Enter the Wicked Witch of the Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|Wikipedia biography]], 3 May 2009}}

What is far more likely to have occurred is this: Walsh probably decided Chris was making a nuisance of himself and asked him what he thought he was doing; Chris probably delivered a big confusing monologue (possibly with a song and dance) about seeking true love; and Walsh then likely dismissed the substance of Chris's response with "You can't do that here." Walsh's point of contention was undoubtedly just the sign, but over the years Chris has demonized her into a brutal harpy whose sole mission in life is to cockblock him.

Undaunted, Chris simply made a new sign, and a few weeks later Walsh confronted him again. In late [[January 2004]], Chris revised his strategy, leaving copies of the ''[[Sonichu's News Dash!]]'' newsletter strewn about campus, each one containing a single "personals ad" about himself. By [[February 2004|February]], Walsh had cracked down on Chris again, banning distribution of the ''News Dash!''.<ref>[[CWC's Diary]], [[February 2004|February 9, 2004]]</ref> In Chris's own words:

{{quote|Then that B-Dog ripped up my notes and all, dragged me to her quarters and talked down to me very RUDELY AND HOARSELY. I reacted with my own attack that she had been asking for the whole time. I was kicked out of PVCC for a year, and I had to take an [[anger]] management course and see a [[Chris and psychology|psychiatrist]] for a while.|CWC's [[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile#Enter the Wicked Witch of the Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|Wikipedia biography]], 3 [[May 2009]]}}

The extent of the "attack" Chris made against Walsh, whether it was physical or just a [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]], is unknown, although it would have had to have been something pretty serious to get him suspended from PVCC ''and'' forced to undergo counseling. The timing of the incident is also unclear, since Chris has cited 16 [[September 2004]] as the date of his suspension.<ref>[[CWC's Diary]], September 16, 2004</ref>

==Conflicts with Jerkops==
By [[August 2004]], Chris had expanded his quest to other [[Attraction Location]]s besides PVCC, such as [[Charlottesville Fashion Square]]. It was here that he attempted a new tactic, inspired by ''[[Excel Saga]]'': laying a [[Red String of Fate]] across the mall floor. This inevitably led to a confrontation with mall security, making this Chris's first recorded encounter with the [[Jerkops]].<ref>[[CWC's Diary]], August 2004</ref>

By [[September 2004|September]], Chris had somehow learned that loitering in public places with a sign advertising his services as a boyfriend made it look like he was "trying to sell [him]self like a new car," but he still managed to miss the point and believe this was something he could work to his advantage. He continued to have confrontations with mall security until 11 September 2004, when he was arrested, handcuffed, and forbidden from entering the mall without one of his parents. With both of his Attraction Locations denied to him, Chris became more lonely and depressed than usual. In his diary he expressed an interest in asking "Santa Clause" for a girlfriend. According to e-mails leaked by [[Jackie]], Chris was completely serious and believed in Santa until he was ''24''.<ref>[[CWC's Diary]], September 2004</ref>

==Anna McLerran==
[[Image:0694-AnnaBD8.JPG|thumb|''Too bad she's a lesbian.'']]
{{main|The Tale Of The Crazy Pacer}}
At some point in 2004 Chris had expanded his activities in the mall, including:

* Pacing around a lot, playing videos on his Game Boy Advance SP.
* Shouting at walls, or "singing random songs from memory now and then".

He was apparently infamous to [[Anna McLerran]] and her friends by the time he finally worked up the nerve to enter the store where Anna worked to strike up a conversation with her. Anna handled herself as politely as she could while having zero interest in this idiot's pathetic romantic overtures, and apparently convinced him that she was off the market.

Despite becoming one of Chris's closest friends, Anna would later document the 2004 incident in a [[2006]] blog post, confirming that, despite whatever good qualities she sees in Chris, deep down she knows he's a few hedgehogs short of a [[Chaotic Combo]].

==Hanna==
On 29 [[March 2005]] Chris (who had somehow regained full access to the mall) momentarily believed his prayers had been answered when he was approached by [[Hanna]], a girl who worked at the local [[Wikipedia:Starbucks|Starbucks]]. She invited Chris to have coffee with her. Chris quickly overreacted to this sudden reversal of fortune, calling his mother and showing Hanna his entire [[Sonichu Scrapbook|''Sonichu'' scrapbook]].

[[Anna McLerran]] later informed Chris that Hanna was simply trolling him for the [[lulz]]. In shock, Chris confronted Hanna and, when she admitted the truth, ran away screaming "NOOOOOOOOOO!", exactly like they do in movies. The entire incident was a crippling blow to Chris's self-esteem and the kind of thing that would be embarrassing for anyone. He also apparently made enough of a scene to get himself [[banned]] from the mall again. Subsequently, Chris dramatized the whole story in [[Sub-Episode 2|the comic]], where he was able to get the last word in exactly the way he could not in real life.

==Conflicts with [[Manajerks]]==
Around [[June 2005]], with the mall becoming a more difficult place to pick up chicks, Chris turned to his local [[Mal-Wart|Wal-Mart]], where he would go to the in-store [[McDonald's]], set up his sign and various nerd amusements, and wait around for hours. On 20 June 2005 Chris was confronted by the men he identified as [[B-Manajerk]] and [[Merried Seinor Comic]], who took issue with his sign and called the police on him. Chris hid the sign, effectively avoiding criminal charges, but he was banned from the McDonald's. He interpreted this to mean he was not banned from the Wal-Mart, however.

On 22 June Chris again came into conflict with the B-Manajerk over his [[Pixelblock]] sculptures, and the conflict drew the attention of the [[W-M-Manajerk]]. According to Chris, the Wal-Mart manager attempted to reason with him...

{{quote|But I sat silent for a minute, then I said to him, “I do not speek [''sic''] to any Man other than myself, because [[JERKS|they]] all have taken all the pretty girls leaving me with none.” Verbal Combat had started, and during the fight, I ran off, still giving verbal punishment, as well as da finger, and many “[[Curse-Ye-Ha-Me-Ha]]s.” I nearly backed up onto him with [[Son-Chu|my car]], and I gave him another finger. Then I dashed off.|[[CWC's Diary#June 2005|CWC's Diary]], 22 [[June 2005]]}}

In [[July 2005|July]], Chris relocated to the newly-opened [[Charlottesville]] [[Get-Tar Region|Target]], where he quickly found himself in trouble for loitering once again. Chris refused to leave at first. When store employees returned with [[Jerkops|police officers]] (including [[Bagget]]), Chris offered to leave if they would listen to a prepared speech. According to Chris's account of the incident, five officers then jumped on him and [[Wikipedia:hogtie|hogtied]] him without provocation; in reality, it's more likely that they saw he would not surrender and tried to arrest him peacefully, and he resisted to the point that they had to completely subdue him out of fear of his 'tard rage.

In the dramatization of these events in [[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu'' #4]], the jerkops need nothing short of a giant robot to capture Chris, and [[Sister|his twin sister]] rescues him so that they can destroy the jerkops' entire operation, which of course is commanded by [[Mary Lee Walsh]] from [[PVCC]].

Chris has said that he was eventually cleared of all criminal charges related to the dispute at [[Target]]. It was apparently at this point that [[Barb|his mother]], in a dazzling display of parental guidance, informed him about two years too late that the [[Attraction Sign]] made him look [[Slow-in-the-minds|retarded]].

==Megan Schroeder==
[[Image:ChrisAndMeganUnpixelated.jpg|thumb|''Boyfriend-free no more!'']]
[[File:Rap.PNG|thumb|You gonna get raped.]]
Chris met [[Megan Schroeder]] in the summer of [[2005]] and was immediately attracted by such qualities as [[China|her gender]], [[Boyfriend-free girl|her lack of a boyfriend]] and her willingness to talk to him for more than five minutes (although she compliments him for tolerating ''her''). In Chris's mind Megan was already destined to be his sweetheart, and the only thing left to do was convince Megan to accept this truth. The Love Quest was effectively on hold from this time until [[March 2008]]. All of Chris's writings during this time demonstrate that he believed he was already in a monogamous relationship with Megan and further Sweetheart Searching was largely unnecessary.

Aside from Megan's complete disinterest in romance with Chris, the relationship suffered other stumbling blocks, such as Megan's discomfort at Chris showering her with gifts; Megan's outrage over Chris's sexual harassment, hatred of men, and rampant homophobia; Megan's unwillingness to share a [[Megan_Emails,_Aug-Dec_2007#Megan_is_annoyed_and_creeped_out|hypothetical hotel room]] with Chris; and Megan's discovery that Chris had to [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|draw himself fingerbanging her]] to suppress his fantasies of assaulting and raping her. Even though she reacted as any normal human being would in the same situation, he was still shocked that she "broke up" with him and thought that all he had to do was say "I'm sorry" as much as possible.

Encyclopedia Dramatica did not ruin Chris's relationship with Megan, but Chris's obsession with defeating ED definitely did, since his attempt to blow ED's mind by posting his [[Rule 34]] drawings caused her to discover what a deranged individual he truly is and break off all contact with him. Chris totally missed the point about the fingerbanging picture, believing that its continued presence on ED was the issue, and not the fact that he drew it in the first place. This contributed to his drive to shut the site down for much of 2008, until people on the [[Internet]] figured out the simplest way to troll him...
{{clear}}

==Internet Love Quest==
[[File:Personalprofile.jpg|thumb|Chris's image from [[The Hook Cafe|''The HooK'' Café]] profile.]]

After becoming an infamous lolcow thanks to his edit war with ED, Chris began to receive unexpected attention from attractive single women who loved his comics and totally weren't just looking to troll him. Since then, Chris has taken his Love Quest onto the Internet, proclaiming that his TRUE and HONEST sweetheart is whichever girl he's managed to pin down. Chris, or someone impersonating Chris, has at one point attempted appealing to [http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080804202349AA80xDL Yahoo! Answers] on how a [[Chris|"lonesome fella"]] can attract a boyfriend-free girl, going as far as mentioning his previous [[Attraction Sign|tactics]] and even asking his answerer to be his sweetheart.

With each sweetheart he meets online Chris follows a predictable pattern, demonstrating what he had always intended to do with any woman he met in real life. He begins with a series of proclamations of his TRUE and HONEST love, and then begins planning out how the woman will travel to his home. Chris professes to believe in the rule that sex is out of the question until the [[third date]], but since he expects every romantic encounter to end in total success he makes it clear - in as gentlemanly a fashion as he can manage - that he expects sex at the woman's earliest convenience. Amazingly, as each successive Internet gal pal proves to be a [[troll]], Chris becomes more devoted to the next one, to the point that within a month of meeting Ivy online he began planning his marriage to a woman he had never even seen face-to-face.

When addressing the question of why Chris readily takes each new troll at face value, his own mindset must be taken into consideration. Chris's prospects of finding a girl locally are virtually zero, and he knows this. At the same time, the Internet seems (from his point of view) to be an endless cavalcade of single, attractive women who are fascinated with him, making it an irresistible resource in his Love Quest. By now Chris is fully aware that each woman he meets online ''could'' be a troll, but each time he readily accepts evidence that she is not and dismisses out of hand any suggestion that she is. He does this because he ''wants'' to believe she's real; the alternative is to surrender to despair.

==Returning to real life==
[[Image:WantWoman.jpg|thumb|''The [[Internet]] is so yesterday, Love Quest is always in.'']]
In Chris's final chat with [[Sarah May]] from early March 2009, he claimed that he planned to give up looking for a [[sweetheart]] online, and return to searching for a girl in local [[Charlottesville]]. [[Trolls]] everywhere rejoiced, for this could only mean one thing - a return to the fabled [[Attraction Sign]] and the days of his exploits against the [[Jerkops]] and his other IRL misadventures.

This effort only lasted so long, however. Chris's first attempt at a real-life date, with [[Emily]], ended in tragedy (for him) after the intervention of the [[Man in the Pickle Suit]]. During the brief [[Rollin' and Trollin']] era in the early summer of 2009, Chris was allegedly spotted prowling Charlottesville Fashion Square in his ''[[Guitar Hero]]: Metallica'' tattoo sleeves, but it wasn't long before he gave up and retreated back to the Internet.

In late [[October 2009]], after a long hiatus, the [[sweetheart]] cycle began again, with the advent of the incredibly disturbing [[I Love You Kacey]]. Chris initially found success in his campaign to pry Kacey away from her current boyfriend, [[Liquid Chris]], even managing to meet her in person on multiple occasions. Later, though, the relationship collapsed under the weight of Chris's bizarre and disturbing behavior.

The opening months of [[2010]] saw Chris land himself in romantic misadventures both in reality and online. He managed to pry himself out of his room for a while and in the process meet a real person, [[The Wallflower]]. Like Megan, however, she rebuffed all his attempts at a more-than-friendly relationship, and eventually cut off all contact with him. Meanwhile, one of his [[The Hook Cafe|online personal ads]] led to an [[Jackie e-mails|extended conversation]] with another potential sweetheart, but Chris tripped over his duck long before he ever got a chance to meet "Jackie" in real life.

Chris maintains a profile on OKCupid, but does not seem to have visited in several months. His OKCupid profile is about what you would expect in terms of portraying himself and demanding what he expects from the girl in the relationship.

==Beyond the 'Net==
Chris's stated ambition to [[100 2189|leave the Internet forever]] suggests that he may return to looking for love in the real world. His visit to the Charlottesville [[Fridays After Five]] event in June 2010 featured a drastically shortened version of the old Attraction Sign scrawled across the front of his [[muscle bra|sports bra]].

Whether he'll stick with this approach remains to be seen, however. He has never been able to stay away from the Internet for long, and it's hard to imagine that his current strategy for pulling girls in real life will work out very well for him.

Despite this, Chris believed he had found another way to attract females, this time via the [[Flipnote Hatena]], which is (despite being accessed on a DSi) still on the internet. Between 17 June and 2 July 2010, Chris ignored Flipnote Hatena's "family friendly" policies and attempted to use it like a dating site. A lot of Chris's tags towards the female members were flirtatious to a point, and he even [[For Women ONLY|made a Flipnote]] calling out to every woman he had tagged or tagged him. However, despite the trolls swarming in to attack, non-troll responses were made by girls he tagged, [[pedofork|most of whom were in their tweens to early teens]].

==Fuck Side Quest Completed==

On the 12th April the following status message from Chris's [[Facebook]] was leaked:

[[File:Virginbreaker.png]]

However, there is some evidence in this post that somebody (if not Chris) hired a prostitute for him. Given the short time it took for them to meet and do the nasty (in ''her'' room, no less), her comparing him to her last partner and [[Lie|telling him what he wants to hear]] about his [[Duck|dick]], and the extremely telling fact that Chris does not consider her a sweetheart (saying his 'sweetheart-to-be' will find out about this), it seems rather plausible.

Considering Chris' [[Lie|track record for telling the truth, however...]]

==Promotional Images==
During his Love Quest, Chris produced some "sexy" pictures to attract the ladies. Needless to say, it had the opposite effect.

<center>
<gallery>
Image:0773-CWC23.JPG|You'll never guess what I just swallowed.
Image:0775-CWCCDPose.JPG|[[Sonic the Hedgehog|Way past cool!]]
Image:0776-CWCGuitar.JPG|Shredding some hot licks on my [[Guitar|gitar]]!!
Image:0777-CWConbed.JPG|I'M GOING TO RAPE YOU!
Image:0778-CWCPin.JPG|Staring at the [[Sailor Moon poster]] while tanning.
Image:0779-CWCREAR.JPG|Baby got back!
Image:0780-CWCrelax.JPG|Are you craving my delicious inner thighs?
Image:0781-CWCspdbed.JPG|I've been waiting for you...
</gallery>
</center>

==See also==
*[[Attraction images]]
*[[Chris and sex]]
*[[Hard Love Quest]]
*[[Sweetheart]]
*[[Story of My Current Days]]

== Sources ==
<references/>

{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:Love Quest]]
[[Category:CWC-isms]]

Who's Your Brony?

2012-02-26T20:57:02Z

Croatchu:

{{Honest}}

'''Who's Your Brony?''' is a pair of videos ('''gvfioeqnguvfieqrav (1)''' and '''hcyrejetuikyfdfmynbgr (2)''') leaked on 25 [[February 2012]] in which Chris has sex with the [[Jackie]] sex doll while saying "Who's your [[My Little Pony|Brony]]?" The video is similar in concept to [[For Julie's Eyes Only]], but is notably less horrifying because Chris stays clothed. He then proceeds to display his "tattoos".

==Videos==
===Sexy time===
{{Infobox/video
| name = Who's Your Brony? 1
| video = {{#ev:youtube|p23-_rWJ2Ag}}
| stardate =
| subject = {{Sex}}
| style = {{Crazy}}
| saga = {{Jackie}} {{Tomgirl}}
| shirt = Green T-shirt
| previous =
| next =
}}

==== Transcript ====

Okie-dokie. For you, Jackie-pie, I show you my cutie mark on my better... mini-skirt.

''[Turns around, although nothing is visible because Chris' fat ass is too close to the camera.]''

I've a fir on CG? (indecipherable) and a puzzle piece for autism! I has these, I had these put here for weeks! So I pretty much was one step ahead of ya there.

And now, for the sex.

''[Chris proceeds to hump the blowup doll.]''

Yeah. Who's your brony? Who's your brony? Whooo's your brony? Yeah, Jackie! Who's your brony? C'mon, Jackie, take it from your. C'mon, Jackie Pie, you take it form you Apple Chris!

All day long, ''(mumbling)''

''[Chris switches to doggy-style position.]''

Who's your brony? Who's your brony? Who's your brony, Jackie-Pie?

Who's your brony? Who's your brony? Who's your brony? I'm your brony, Jackie-Pie! I'll be your brony all day long!

''[Chris and the doll change positions.]''

Who's your brony? I'm your brony,

''[Chris fakes an orgasm.]''

'''UUUUGH!''' Delicious!

===Tat Ass===
{{Infobox/video
| name = Who's Your Brony? 2
| video = {{#ev:youtube|N1r6lyA5kaI}}
| stardate =
| subject = {{Sex}}
| style = {{Crazy}}
| saga = {{Jackie}} {{Tomgirl}}
| shirt = Green T-shirt
| previous =
| next =
}}

==== Transcript ====

Woopsie-doodles! I could not do the other favor.

[Chris lifts his skirt.]

Hope that's good enough! Thank you very much, I love you, Jackie pie!

{{Sweetheart Videos}}
[[Category:Leaked videos]]
[[Category:Jackie Saga videos]]

Transgender

2012-01-03T19:35:25Z

Croatchu: Put article in past tense (the saga is generally agreed to be over), added misc. pictures

[[File:TG11.jpg|thumb|Chris during the Tomgirl Saga]]
The '''Tomgirl Saga''' was the eighteenth [[saga]] in [[Chris]]'s life. After being suggested that he get in touch with his feminine side, Chris became a "[[tomgirl]]", dressing in woman's clothes and putting on makeup. The [[Calling Out]] videos are generally included as part of this saga.

==Summary==
===Prologue===
At the end of [[March 2011]], Chris changed his [[PSN]] quote to "I am Tomgirl". This was the first sign of the Tomgirl Saga, and caused much speculation among people following Chris. What exactly this quote meant, however, would not be answered until the end of [[April 2011|April]].

On 29 April, the [[Tomgirl Pictures]] were released by [[Surfshack Tito]]. In them, Chris is dressed in woman's clothing, posing in, at least what he believes are, seductive positions. This marked the official beginning of the Tomgirl Saga, as well as finally revealing what his previous PSN quote meant. For some reason, Chris removed the Tomgirl PSN quote immediately after PSN came back online after a month of inactivity, possibly due to receiving attention from [[trolls]].

<center>{{Collapsible|Tomgirl pictures|<gallery>
File:TG2.jpg|Tomgirl car in ''[[ModNation Racers]]''
File:TG3.jpg|Chris previously drew on the [[Charlottesville]] Free Speech Wall in [[Chris's Big Night Out II]].
File:TG4.jpg
File:TG5.jpg|Chris matched the color of his [[Amnyfest Ring|high school ring]] with his new pair of sandals.
File:TG6.jpg
File:TG7.jpg|Left ear buccaneer, right ear [[Homos|queer]].
File:TG8.jpg|Not the first time that Chris has covered his face in [[pickle]]s and [[Semen|white goo.]] Also, he's using the [[Plush Breasts]] as a pillow.
File:TG9.jpg|You just know this picture will be used in the paper when Chris finally kills [[Michael Snyder|someone]].
File:TG10.jpg|Not even white knights can say anything to defend this...
File:TG11.jpg
File:TG12.jpg
File:TG13.jpg|DAT ASS
File:TG14.jpg
File:TG15.jpg|[[Barbara|Barb 2.0]]
File:TG16.jpg
File:TG17.jpg|He made himself into a sweetheart from the ground-up.
File:TG18.jpg|GOODBYE HORSES
File:TG19.jpg
File:TG20.jpg|The PlayStation Move SharpShooter doesn't make the look any manlier.
File:TG21.jpg
File:TG22.jpg
File:TG23.jpg
File:TG24.jpg|Note the [[Medallions_of_Fail#The_Asperchu_Medallion_.28a.k.a._The_Medallion_of_Win.3F.29|Asperchu Medallion]] at top right.
File:TG25.jpg
File:TG26.jpg
File:CWCJuly2011.jpg|Chris's [[Facebook]] pic of July 2011, with Tomgirl earrings
File:PSN TOMGIRL1-1.jpg|A random PS3 Home avatar which in no way reminds us of Chris. Good thing they put the usernames there.
File:Chris 09.jpg|In September, Chris was spotted at [[Wal-Mart]]. Note the purse.
</gallery>}}
</center>

===Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia===
[[Image:ponyboy.jpg|left|thumb|Chris' TATOV avatar, used while posting as KookyDashy]]
In late May, Chris discovered the [[Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia]] forum. The forum was dedicated to tomboys and tomgirls living in Virginia wishing to discuss their lives. Chris joined under the username Kookydashy, marking a midpoint in the saga.

In the posts Chris made, he mostly talked about himself and his tomgirl antics. Chris revealed he had [[Homos|come out]] to his parents, only to receive insults from them. [[Barb]], in particular, has kept complaining about his new attire, and [[Bob]], according to Chris, "threw the damned fag card" at him. Chris also recounts a story where he went to the lady's restroom because he "started feeling discomfort in using the Men's restroom". However, a [[jerkop]] caught him and yelled at him for going to the women's restroom, only to ignore him and continue using the women's restroom.

Later posts Chris made mention his online trolling, practically saying everything but "I am Christian Weston Chandler". According to Chris, socializing online makes people more [[autistic]], and people should socialize offline. Chris also became paranoid of being trolled even on these forums, leading to him accusing a tomboy looking for a tomgirl of being a troll. For a month, Chris didn't post at the forums.

A month later, [[Thorg]] discovers the Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia forum, and makes an article about it on the [[CWCki]]. Chris notices this quickly, and alert his fellow tomboys and tomgirls a day later. Chris admits that he is Christian Weston Chandler. Chris complains about the trolls, and says that he is not a bad person, despite what the CWCki says. The other posters promise to help Chris defeat the trolls. After this, the forums become defunct, as the tomboys and tomgirls help Chris find a way to get revenge.

===Calling Out===
[[File:CWC0811.PNG|thumb|Chris during the Calling Out videos]]
In August, Chris makes his return to Youtube. After planning with his fellow tomboys and tomgirls, he has obtained dox on all of his trolls. From here, Chris makes a series of videos calling out various trolls.

Chris first calls out Surfshack Tito, and demands that he 1) admit to hacking PlayStation Network, 2) apologize to the [[Wallflower]] and her family, 3) send Chris $1,000, 4) delete all of his pages from the CWCki, and 5) apologize to Chris. Surfshack Tito replied a few days later, meeting Chris's demands.

The next troll called out was Thorg. Chris demands that he 1) put up a billboard in NYC declaring that Chris is straight, 2) delete all of his pages from the CWCki, and 3) apologize to Chris. Unlike Tito, Thorg did not take Chris seriously. Chris re-calls out Thorg, and eventually unmasks him as Jeremy Slonwhite, a fat, nerdy atheist living in Canada.

Chris then calls out [[Jack Thaddeus]], and simply demands that he apologize to Chris. However, Jack Thaddeus unmasked himself, revealing that he is ADF, another lolcow. Chris responds by mocking him and his communist views.

Later, Chris calls out [[Alec Benson Leary]], and demands that he apologize to Chris. Alec Benson Leary did not respond to Chris's [[Calling Out]] video, so Chris unmasked him as Christopher Paul Whitney, a fat man who eats food on Youtube.

Finally, Chris called out [[BlueSpike]], and demanded that he 1) stop people from prank calling him and screaming "JULAY", and 2) apologize to Chris. BlueSpike did not respond, but Chris did not unmask him because tragedy had hit his family.

===Epilogue===
On [[September 2011|6 September 2011]], [[Bob]] passed away from heart failure. This brought the Tomgirl Saga to a very abrupt end, as Chris was in mourning and too depressed to make more videos. BlueSpike's deadline to respond to Chris passed without Chris unmasking him. Chris has yet to make any more videos since his death, and only a few pictures of tomgirl Chris has emerged since then.

==Timeline==
* [[March 2011|30 March 2011]] - Chris changes his [[PSN]] quote to "I am Tomgirl", foreshadowing the [[Tomgirl Pictures]].
* [[April 2011|29 April 2011]] - [[Tomgirl Pictures|Several pictures of Chris in his tomgirl attire are released.]] These pictures ended the speculation caused by Chris's most recent PSN quote, as well as marking the official start of the Tomgirl Saga.
* [[May 2011|14 May 2011]] - Chris removes the "I am Tomgirl" quote from his PSN account, immediately after PSN comes back online after a month of being inactive.
* 29 May 2011 - Chris discovers and joins the [[Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia]] forum as Kookydashy. He makes three notable posts:
** Chris writes his introduction to his fellow tomboys and tomgirls.
** Chris describes how he came out as a tomgirl to his parents, as [[Bob]] called him a "fag", and [[Barb]] commented "I didn't raise a daughter".
** Chris recounts an experience where he got yelled at by a [[jerkop]] for going to the women's restroom.
* [[June 2011|9 June 2011]] - In another post at the Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia forum, Chris reveals that Barb tried to pay him to stop wearing panties, only to refuse. He then goes on and suggests that all men should be legally required to wear [[Muscle bra|bras]].
* 17 June 2011 - Chris talks about himself in a post at the Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia forum. He mentions how he had more [[gal-pals]] then male friends, and that [[dating education]] should be a mandatory class.
* 22 June 2011 - Chris makes his final post on the Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia forum before being discovered by the [[CWCki]], where he all but says he is Christian Weston Chandler, mentioning both his [[trolls]] and [[Sonichu]].
* [[July 2011|20 July 2011]] - [[Thorg]] discovers the Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia forum, and makes an article about it on the CWCki.
* 21 July 2011 - Chris responds to the Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia's discovery in a post, where he officially declares that he is Christian Weston Chandler. He complains about his trolls, and reassures his fellow posters that he is not a bad person. After talking about this with other posters for a few days, he stops posting on the forums, and later the forums are deleted.
* [[August 2011|6 August 2011]] - The next part of the Tomgirl Saga begins, when Chris returns to [[Youtube]]. He makes three videos, calling out various trolls and threatening to reveal their dox if they do not comply to his demands.
** Chris calls out [[Surfshack Tito]], and demands that he 1) admit to hacking PlayStation Network, 2) apologize to the [[Wallflower]] and her family, 3) send Chris $1,000, 4) delete all of his pages from the CWCki, and 5) apologize to Chris.
** Chris calls out [[Thorg]], and demands that he 1) put up a billboard in NYC declaring that Chris is straight, 2) delete all of his pages from the CWCki, and 3) apologize to Chris.
** Chris tells Thorg and Tito that they must respond to the [[Calling Out]] videos by August 31.
* 9 August 2011 - Two videos by Chris were released, and Tito releases a video responding to Chris.
** Chris calls out [[Alec Benson Leary]], simply demanding that he apologizes to Chris.
** Chris goes outside, pretends to dig up [[Patti]], and wears her as a coat, in a parody of The Silence of the Lambs.
** Tito responds to Chris, who is desperate in making sure Chris does not release his dox, and complies to Chris's demands.
* 10 August 2011 - Chris makes two more videos:
** Chris accepts Tito's attempts to meet Chris's demands, and re-calls out Thorg for not meeting Chris's demands.
** Chris mentions that he never dated the [[Wallflower]], and that she was simply a female friend. Chris also mentions he has a new [[sweetheart]].
* 16 August 2011 - Chris makes another two videos, one regarding the Calling Out videos:
** Chris calls out [[Jack Thaddeus]], and demands that he apologizes to Chris.
** Chris makes a makeup tutorial video, reinforcing his tomgirl status.
* 20 August 2011 - Chris uploads a video where he sings about wristwatches dedicated to Thorg, which intimidates Thorg and causes him to leave the Internet.
* 23 August 2011 - Chris uploads another three videos:
** Chris re-calls out Jack Thaddeus, and reveals that he is a communist.
** Chris calls out [[BlueSpike]], and demands that he 1) stop people from prank calling Chris and yelling "JULAY", and 2) apologize to Chris.
** Chris shows off his hand-me-down laptop given to him by a fan, and mentions that he upgraded it.
* 28 August 2011 - A Youtube user named "CWCvilleProductions" uploads a video featuring Chris. In it, Chris rocks out to a Skyrim remix while celebrating his victory over Thorg.
* 29 August 2011 - Chris responds to Jack Thaddeus who revealed he was ADF. Chris reinforces his [[homophobia]] while stating he also likes lesbians.
* 30 August 2011 - Chris unmasks Alec Benson Leary a day before the deadline, who has not responded to Chris's Calling Out videos. Chris reveals that he is Christopher Paul Whitney, a fat man on Youtube.
* 31 August 2011 - The deadline for Surfshack Tito, Thorg, and Alec Benson Leary to apologize to Chris.
* [[September 2011|6 September 2011]] - [[Bob]] dies of heart failure. Unfortunately, Chris's mourning put an abrupt end to the Calling Out videos, and possibly the Tomgirl Saga.
* 15 September 2011 - The deadline for BlueSpike to apologize to Chris. However, Chris did not unmask BlueSpike as he was still in mourning.

==See also==
* [[Tomgirl Pictures]]
* [[Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia]]
* [[Calling Out]]

2000s

2012-01-02T11:34:54Z

Croatchu:

__NOEDITSECTION__
[[Image:0828-EP12-5P7-1.jpg|thumb|right|Chris in the new milennium.]]
[[File:Cwchrono graph.png|thumb|CWC's activity in [[2008]], [[2009]] and [[2010]].]]
[[Image:0583-CWC19-2.jpg|thumb|right|Chris in '''2001'''.]]
[[Image:0315-KellieAndesY2K.jpg|thumb|In '''2001''', Chris lost touch with [[Kellie Andes]].]]
[[Image:0599-CWC20-4.jpg|thumb|Chris, turning 20 in '''2002'''.]]
[[Image:0618-BarbaraIs60-1.jpg|thumb|Cake Chris made for his mother's 60th birthday in '''2001'''. It features Sonichu...]]
[[Image:136-LoveSearchItems.jpg|thumb|[[Love Quest]] items from '''2003''' and '''2004'''.]]

The shit finally hit the fan in '''the 2000s'''. [[Chris]] came of age sexually, began his [[Love Quest]], invented [[Sonichu]], stalked lots of women, got thrown out of malls, and became a popular LOLcow on the internet.

==2000==
The year '''2000''' is the year that Chris turned 18 years old. He graduated from [[high school]], and started attending [[PVCC]]. The year 2000 is iconic for the [[True and Loyal Fanbase|Sonichu fanbase]], as it was the year that [[Christian]] thought up [[Sonichu]] whilst making a mix CD. Chris, however, didn't start making [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu comics]] until [[2004]].
===Events of 2000===
''See [[2000]]''

==2001==
The year '''2001''' is the year that Chris turned 19 years old. Another thing worth mentioning is that beginning from age 19 onwards, Chris has been rapidly gaining weight as photos taken from this year show Chris's growing double chin, as well as the first noticeable appearance of his man boobs.
===Events of 2001===
''See [[2001]]''

==2002==
The year '''2002''' is the year that Chris turned 20 years old. What Christian did in this year is mostly a mystery, but it might include playing the vidya.
===Events of 2002===
''See [[2002]]''

==2003==

===Events of 2003===
''See [[2003]]''

==2004==
The year '''2004''' shows the appearance of the first ''[[Sonichu's News Dash!]]'', Christian's digital news bulletin. Christian spreading this bulletin through [[PVCC]], started his mythical feud with [[Mary Lee Walsh]], the dean of PVCC, eventually resulting in him getting expelled from college. At the end of this year, Christian started drawing ''[[Sonichu 0|Sonichu #0]]''.

===Events of 2004===
''See [[2004]]''

==2005==
[[File:156-CWCMegan1.jpg|thumb|left|Chris and Meg-chan in '''2005''']]
The year '''2005''' was, in retrospective, Christian's most productive year, resulting in him drawing 4 issues of the [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu comic]]. Because of getting expelled from [[PVCC]], Chris had a lot of free time on his hands, leading in him putting a lot more effort in his [[love quest]]. June and July are characterized by a series of fights between Christian and the local authorities, resulting in a trial, and, according to Chris, severe traumatic scarring. In 2005, Christian also gained two of his most renown friends, [[Anna McLerran]] and [[Megan Schroeder]]. The first, a [[Mormon]] [[Wikipedia:Pacific Sunwear|Pac-Sun]] employee, Chris met whilst [[The Tale of the Crazy Pacer|pacing the mall]] on his [[love quest]]. The second, an insecure female-otaku, he met playing ''[[Yu-Gi-Oh!]]'' at his local game store.

===Events of 2005===
''See: [[2005]]''

==2006==
The year '''2006''' shows several important developments within Christian's behavior that are now seen as typical. Firstly, Christian starts to get more and more clingy towards [[Megan]]. Via [[e-mail]], she repeatedly tells him off, but to no avail. Secondly, he starts engaging to large extent in the conspicuous consumption that would eventually get him into large debts. For the first time, Chris start buying porno-items, [[My Little Pony]]s, and other seemingly childish and useless objects from sites like eBay and AdamandEve.com. Although Christian is unemployed, he still has a small social-life. He mostly goes out to engage in card game-related activities. In [[2006]], Barbara apparently asks Chris to stop drawing the ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' sub-episodes. Therefore, after [[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu'' #4]], no more sub-episodes come out.

===Events of 2006===
''See [[2006]]''

==2007==
The second half of the year '''2007''' show some important developments within Christian's life. Firstly, Chris enters and unfairly loses the [[PaRappa the Rapper Contest]], leaving him disillusioned and enraged. Secondly, he discovers a satirical [[ED]] page written about him. These two injustices lead Chris into a bitter, long and frustrated rage, eventually giving spark to certain deep, complex and mysterious aspects of madness within his person, that, when revealed, would prove to be a decisive factor leading to the obsessive [[trolls|trolling]] of Christian's person in 2008.

===Events of 2007===
''See [[2007]]''

==2008==
The year '''2008''' is the year that Chris turned 26 years old. [[2008]] showed the completion of two phases that would, because of a strange coincidence, put Chris in the unique and unreal situation that he would be in the first months of [[2009]]. The first was a phase of alienation, in which Chris's illogical behavior frightened away his only friend, [[Megan]], and got him thrown out of both his church and his local game store, leaving him desperate and lonely. The second was a phase of trolling in which a semi-organized group of obsessed, amused and anonymous individuals, via a vast understanding of the new media, started to take the places of Chris's acquaintances, either by posing as online-girlfriends, or members of an online-fanbase. This second phase was rough and bumpy, but eventually created the parameters of Chris's life in 2009.

===Events of 2008===
''See [[2008]]''

==2009==
Throughout '''2009''', Chris's life was unreal and semi-controlled, facilitated by the apparent lack of know-how and interest in his life from his parents. The first, unsmooth wave of [[trolls|trolling]] from [[2008]] was replaced by a [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (message board)|more organized]], [[Krapple|more obsessive]] and more complex second wave, leading to far-reaching insight into Chris's life, and [[sex tape|things]] we can never unsee.
===Events of 2009===
''See [[2009]]''
==Sources==
<references/>
{{Timeline}}
[[Category:Chronology]]

December 2011

2012-01-01T16:06:44Z

Croatchu:

'''December 2011''' was the final month in what was arguably the darkest year in [[Chris|Chris']] life.

==Events==
*07 December - Chris changes his [[voicemail message|voicemail greeting]], informing listeners that he is apparently unwell.
*08 December - A troll [[Rocky Shoemaker call|calls Rocky Shoemaker]] and discovers (by pretending to be a court-appointed psychiatrist) that there is a severe bug infestation at Chris's home.
*09 December - Chris changes his [[voicemail message|voicemail greeting]] again, apparently feeling better.
*15 December - Chris and [[Barbara Chandler|Barb]] appear in court over the [[28 October 2011]] incident. Their case is continued until January 5th, 2012.
*25 December - Chris celebrates his first [[Christmas]] without [[Robert Chandler|his father]].
*26 December - Chris changes his [[PSN]] status to "Go Socialize OFFLINE!", possibly attempting to make it "public" that he's sticking to the advice given to him during the time of his trial.
{{Timeline}}

Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia

2011-12-24T02:03:02Z

Croatchu:

{{Articleofthenow}}
'''Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia''' is a now-defunct forum that was established in late [[April 2011]] and ceased to exist later that year<ref>http://www.forumer.com/forum-error.php?u=tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com</ref>. [[Chris]] was posting as himself under the alias "Kookydashy". This resulted in several stories of his exploits as a [[tomgirl]] that, to say the least, made the effort of tracking him down more than worth it. Chris posted on and off, trying his best to conceal his identity in the most obvious way possible. Below are his T&ToV posts, with blue representing Chris' posts and red representing posts in the threads he was responding to.

== Posts ==
===Re: Introductions!===
In which Chris openly announces he is Christian Weston Chandler as much as he can without actually saying it.

[[Image:ponyboy.jpg|thumb|[[My Little Pony|Kookydashy]]: Interests include [[Plush Breasts of Fail|breasts]], [[China|pussy]], and [[Autism Awareness E-mails|autism awareness]].]]

{{quotebox|Hello, fellow tomgirls. :)

Y'all may address me by my screen name in the board talk. I like [[Chris and Music|music]], [[Kaka Makeup Basics|makeup]], [[Chris and Fashion|dressin' up]] in my mini, [[Mass Debating|havin' fun]] 'n hangin' with my [[Gal-pals|girlfriend]]s, [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys|karaoke]], [[video games]], crafting and [[art]].

I am also empathetic, so [[Autism|I can understand others people's feelings]], as well as my own. I am a dynamic, complex individual.

I do not have many [[jerks|dude pals]], because I have my own mental hang-ups against the majority of them; Nothing Personal. I have a history of being bullied by some mean brutes, as well as [[homos|homosexuals]], over the [[internet]]. Cyber-Bullies/[[Trolls]]/Anons are a hot button with me. I prefer not to discuss that issue further.

And I am an all-around good, [[death threats|friendly]], [[List of Chris's lies|honest]], [[Vibrator|heterosexual]] tomgirl.

Thank you all for offering me respect, as I respect each of you and your opinions on the board.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=2&p=157#p157]</ref>}}

===Re: Coming out to my parents===
In this thread, Chris opened up about his parents' feelings in regards to his newfound fetish.

{{quotebox|Y'all are singin' my song; my [[Barb|mom]] and [[Bob|dad]] were shocked bad when I told them I was a tomgirl. Soo Literally old-fasioned (they're both [[Chris and English|seinors]]). My mom said "I didn't raise a daughter", and my father threw the damned "fag" card at me.

I will Always be Straight, Mom and Dad; give me some faith and trust.

What a world with outside influances to put great paranoia in our families.

Also, try looking up "tomgirl" on [[Wikipedia]]; it redirects to "effeminancy". While effeminancy is true for us, I feel the contents of that page is against us, due to it addressing the [[homos]].

Someone needs to undo the redirects, edit the grammer errors in "tomgirl"`s original edit, and add a ton more detail to it.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=3&p=160#p160]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|My mom is still giving me complaints and nit-picks about me wearing my feminine attire. I wish I could just up and move out and not have to deal with my family; I don't know too many other people here in C-Ville, and those I do know I'm only acquainted with or know little about them for only a few weeks.

Plus finding employment is hard. I got a [[CADD|fancy computer degree]] from [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|community college]], and there have been very slim pickings from it. Already Taken; Quota's Filled; yada, yada, yada.

Plus also, she keeps throwing disbelief towards us by stating "Tomgirls aren't real"; SHE'S a Tomboy; what a bunch of 1940's old-fashioned crap. Plus she watches too much current news, and she is soo paranoid and shit.

I wish I could afford to move out, but I can't afford it [[monthly tugboat|financially]], [[Autism|mentally]] and [[Chris and anger|emotionally]]. Fucking [[stress|pisses me off.]]<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=3&start=20]</ref>}}

===Re: Girly Things Tee Hee===

{{quotebox|After I realized my tomgirly ways, and starting dressing up in my skirts, I started feeling discomfort in using the Men's restroom. I asked my closest gal pal if it would be going too far in using the Ladies' room; she told me to go with my feelings. My next skirted outting, I used the ladies' room, and I squatted, holding my [[duck|arrow]] down over the john (so I would be less likely to soil my skirt); it felt good and Right. Days later, though, after 4 more lady trips; a woman complains and tattles on me, and a stereotypical [[jerk|Brute male]] shouts me out. I felt embarassed. When in skirt, I am still gonna go to the Ladies, because there is no goin' back for me.

Heck, I would not hold it against a tomboy who felt more comfort in using the Men's room over the Ladies'.

As truest Tomgirls, we do respect greatly the women as equals. [[lie|I would never look]] or anything of the sort.

Open for your thoughts.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=20&p=162#p162]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|I've recently got into the original Squinkies, they are so cute and cool. And their gumball-machine dispensing playsets are neat. I like the cupcake-shaped one. And they're also coming out with Squinkie cars for Hot Wheels and Cars 2; little Squinkie people now have cool wheels to drive.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=20&start=10]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|Something else girly I enjoy danglin' around where I go is my ankle bracelet. It's a silver chain with sections of 4 silver beads, and I've added three stars on chains onto the hook. I never take it off, because it is an awesome and cute jewelry, plus it is difficult to put it back on. LOL

I also am enjoying the "Mighty Milky Way" DSiWare game on my [[Nintendo|3DS]]. Luna is a cute, sexy gal, and the method of guiding her from planet to planet is neat.

Anyone else on here with a 3DS may add me onto y'all's Friend List with my code, 2836-0121-9073. Please P.M. me with your 3DS F.C. in response if y'all add me.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=20&p=382#p382]</ref>}}

===Re: Homosexuals===
[[Image:TG20.jpg|thumb|Hear that, homos? Chris is offended by your flamboyance!]]
{{quotebox|I do not care much for the [[homosexual]] males either. I mean, I really feel offended when they get soo flamboyant with their ways and such, it's like they're shoving it in your face. Plus, most of the Cyber-Bullies who gave me grief were homos [[Jack Thaddeus|themselves]], placing their damn label onto me wrongfully.

As long as they each keep it to themselves and behind closed doors, I won't bother them.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=20&p=162#p162]</ref>}}

===Re: July Meetup===

{{quoteboxred|'''by DanielleTheRiveter » Sun May 29, 2011 9:58 pm'''

That's right, everyone. It's that time again. Time to plan our big meet up for July. We're currently looking to meet up somewhere that's kinda central and should be easy for everyone.

First off, remember to dress your best. I'm going to wear my old dress uniform like normal but if you'd like to give us a sneak peak of your outfit, please feel free to do so here.

Also, any suggestions for Date / Time / Location is welcome.

Looking forward to seeing everyone there!|DanielleTheRiveter<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=27&p=229#p229]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|How about at the [[Two's_company_snapshots|Applebees]] next to Toys 'R' Us on Branchlands Lane on a Monday; at 9 PM, they have Karaokee night there. Meet and greet first and sing-along after.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=27&p=229#p229]</ref>}}

===Re: FUKKEN HATERSSSssssssssss===
In which Chris fantasizes about an unrealistic encounter with a "hater", then throws in some unintelligible [[Random-access humor|RAH]].

{{quotebox|I would generally ignore the haters' hurtful comments and move forward too. But if they are really in my face calling me gay or telling me [[virgin|I won't be geeting a woman]], I would tell them like it is in my miniskirt, "All I have to do is lift up my skirt and I'll be up your woman's biz in seconds." :)<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=32&p=291#p291]</ref>}}

===Re: What part of Virginia are you from?===

{{quotebox|Charlottesville is my city of stompin' ground; it can stand some improvement, though. More excitement, and maybe a strip club or two. LOL.

I've also resided in Midlothian for my Middle and [[High School]] years.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=35&p=292#p292]</ref>}}

===Re: 10 interesting facts about you!===
Unsurprisingly the most bland, useless information is considered by Chris to be an "interesting fact"

{{quotebox|[[Autism|1.]] I like to take my time to think of how I feel about the current topic, as well as responding in discussion.

[[Lie|2.]] I am empathetic.

[[Fat|3.]] I appreciate how the fast food places wised up and started offering apple slices as a healthier option after decades of fried potatoes.

[[Trolls|4.]] With my history of being trolled and online coomunicating, I feel online socializing only makes people more autistic-like. People need to wise up and go back to feeling comfortable socializing in person.

[[Cwcsicle|5.]] I have sassy, fun ideas sometimes.

[[Sonichu|6.]] I am good at hand-drawing, coloring and story creating.

[[Manchester High School|7.]] I have had happy years in High School.

[[Autism|8.]] I try to be cautious of other people's intentions and feelings while communicating and coping with them.

[[Lie|9.]] I am technologically and musically inclined.

[[Chris and Art|10.]] I enjoy tinkering and creating when I feel inspired.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=34&p=293#p293]</ref>}}

===Re: tomboy looking 4 tomgirl===
[[Image:Suchin.jpg|thumb|Suchin]]

{{quoteboxred|'''by William » Sun May 29, 2011 2:44 am'''

hello my name is suchin and i am originally from thailand. my friends call me william or will because i am rowdy and like to have fun i am looking for tomgirl to treat me right. i work in manicure salon now and i love beauty on my men and dirt on me

[image]

this is me. what is you? lets meet up and exchange details. i am from richmond but will be in charlottesville for the 4th of july. i love freedom now too.
your turn now! fi dorrar. sacki aur bunti. PLEASE send me a message!|William<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|There is a pretty face, lovely head of [[hair]] and [[Women's Rights|a nice rack]] in the photo. But I feel I have to interject here.

How do we know you are really that woman, or are you really some immature, trolling stupid brat trying to stir trouble on our forum? People have done that sort of thing over the internet; I fell victim to communicating with such people. And from that, I have learned to keep most personal things offline and to myself.

Anyway, I am not going to fall for such an obvious facade, and I wish to prevent anyone else from finding such gross disappointment and disaster.

Fess up, man.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Thu Jun 09, 2011 3:27 am '''

Hey I'm going to be down in Richmond tomorrow anyway, I think you're pretty cute so I'd like to meet up if possible.

I understand if this is kind of sudden, but when I saw that picture I just knew I had to meet this woman.|Tippy<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by William » Thu Jun 09, 2011 3:33 am'''

kookydashy your comment make me so sad? i work so hard on my body to be my tomboy self and i am so tired of others putting me down for me being me. sometimes i think it because they jealous but for you to accuse me of being troll, someting i hate most in whole american world, make me cry some. this remind me of my sister telling me i cannot wear pants because i am woman. i can wear pants AND NOT BE MAN OR UGLY!!!!

as for Tippy, you sound so nice. I would love to meet a creature like you in reality world! i would even love to do your hair and nails and so much more... I am excite now! Yes! Please! I get out of work at around six. Can we do drinkies than??
|William<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Thu Jun 09, 2011 3:38 am'''

OMG that's perfect, I'm supposed to have an early dinner meeting with a supplier, so I will be free right around six. I'll private message you my cell number and other info so we can exchange our numbers and stuff. I am so excited, I cannot wait. I will be counting down the hours till we meet up my Tomboy dream. We'll have drinks, and maybe dessert ;). Hehehehe|Tippy<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by William » Thu Jun 09, 2011 3:44 am'''

AHHHHHHHHHH!!!! Sawatdee kaa!! <3 You are true lady AND gentleman! I will call you tonight to confirm our time together with one another for tomorrow! You have dried every tear of mine so quick and make me smile bright bright bright... I cannot wait to smile more with you! xx|William<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

[[Image:Suchin 2.jpg|thumb|Suchin]]

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Fri Jun 10, 2011 6:00 pm'''

Hey everyone, I have a major update.

So after my meeting with the supplier, who I sweet talked into giving me a discounted rate, I met up with Suchin for drinks. Let me just say Tomboys and Tomgirls, the photos do not do her justice, she looks absolutely incredible. She gave me some great tips on keeping my pedicures lasting longer, we talked about every subject imaginable, and I hope she doesn't mind me saying this, but I am totally crushing on her right now, and cannot wait to see her again. The drive home from Richmond felt like nothing because of how happy I am right now.

Plus I'll always have this picture to remember our incredible night by.

Tippy<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by William » Fri Jun 10, 2011 7:33 pm'''

Yes, it very true ! Tippy you steal my heart and not ever let go! I am happy this way. I love sharing all my pretty lingerie with Tippy and I teach my new Tomgirl how to do Thai lap dance. We are so sensual and one. Tippy and I are item now!! NO TOUCHING! Thank you TBS and TGS of Virgina! <3 xoxo|William<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Fri Jun 10, 2011 7:40 pm'''

Suchin, you catty gal, I thought you were gonna let me announce to the forum that we were an item. It's ok, I still love you. And I can't wait until the next time we're together so I can give you that massage while you play your video games. I've never felt this happy, like this may be the greatest day of my entire life. I've met a lot of girls in my life, but Suchin, you are my woman, my strong, masculine, tomboy woman. I can't wait to see you next weekend, I've already talked to my boss, and I'm getting Friday off so we can spend the whole day together.

I never thought I'd be able to find love on an internet forum, and here we are, happy as can be. Thank you Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virgina, I hope the rest of you find your Tomboys and Tomgirls soon.
|Tippy<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|It looks like I stand corrected of my suspicions. But with my past experiences, and the too great number of crazy people in the world, we all have to be very cautious. And with that, I apologize for my earlier post and hurting your feelings, Suchin.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

===Re: Manicure/Pedicure stories?===
{{quotebox|I have colored my nails before, and it is fun to do for a grand outting.

I feel it ill for me to go in for a manicure, not only due to lack of funds, but I am a recovering nail-biter. I even had to have a fingernail replaced in surgery years ago; it is growing in well, even though slower than the other nine.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=37&p=312#p312]</ref>}}

===Re: Mothers===
{{quotebox|My mother has tried to coerce me into going back to [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|briefs]]; Hells No! Panties are far more comfortable And stylish. And I am not going to ever go out without one of my [[muscle bra|sports bras]] again. She even tried to bribe, or wager, me, but I would not take it.

I feel there should be a law requiring all men to wear bras (sports ones at least); I feel grossed out whenever I see some dude walking sround shirtless. ]:(P<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=7&t=39&p=315#p315]</ref>}}

===Re: Friendship Issues===
{{quotebox|I'd like to talk a bit about those of us (well, me in particular) who have for real only less than or equal to a handful of friends in person.

Growing up, I have had mostly [[gal-pals|female friends]]. I was considerably blessed, yet I still lack the virgin-breaker moment. The close friendships were great, and I really appreciated them in my heart forever. I really should have tried to get further, but before 21, I was [[naive]] on the subject of dating. There Really should be a manditory [[dating education]] class alongside sex ed.

I have known all of my life that I do get along better with women well over those of my own gender. No personal offense to anyone.

I have a mental flaw, along with other learnings, which has taught me that most of the worldwide male poulation are, pretty much, Uncaring, Violent, Ignorant, Dumb, Boring Jerks. And with that, I feel afraid in meeting most males, because I feel ill of getting too close, because of me getting hurt, or something else god-awful. ]:(

Again, no personal offense is meant to anyone.

My gal pal has informed me that me meeting more women and getting it on is very unlikely if I do not have many dude pals. Nutshell; I would be mistaken for a homo, or too easily [[friend zone|friend-zoned]] by women. This tid bit makes me feel sad.

Open for individual responses from Everyone on this forum.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by BornThisWay » Sun Jun 19, 2011 12:24 am'''

Aww, that sux!!!! Anyway I met most of my friends back in high school, or college, or at my past jobs. Sometimes it's hard to keep in touch with everybody but that's why the [[Internet]] and phones were invented! A lot of the friends I hang out with now were from my last job. We'd go out for drinks every Thursday, Friday and Saturday and have the grandest of times! Sometimes I still meet up with them, but not every week like I used to.

As for meeting people, I've never really thought about it because I'm not a really shy person. I guess if you strike up conversations based on stuff you like or stuff you notice about them, that's a good start. It's real easy to sit in your room all day and play video games but you just have to talk to people and get out there. Sometimes I'll just go out all by myself and sit someplace nice and quiet and read. If you look cute sometimes people come up and introduce themselves!

But anyway if you haven't done it already you should get on [[Facebook]] and try to find your old friends and tell them what you've been up to since you've last seen them! It's a really easy way to keep in touch with people especially since a lot of people move away right after high school or college. Facebook is like a high school reunion that never ends! (Sorry if I sound like a commercial!) Plus if there's anyone who still lives in Virginia maybe they can introduce you to some of their single friends! Just be yourself and let us know what they say, ok?|BornThisWay<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|"Social" websites like Facebook and [[MySpace]] are ALL a Joke against socializing. Everybody is on the internet these days. And to Socialize online with total strangers Constantly is an epic fail. That kind of "socializing" on the internet will only result in making people more and more Autistic-Like. Think about it.

The more time we spend in front of an internet screen leads to constant lack of practice in REAL Socializing face to face offline.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Mike Love » Tue Jun 21, 2011 5:23 am'''

I like Facebook. There's a lot of people I don't nescesarilly talk to a lot, but I like to be able to keep up with what they're doing. Plus it makes it easier to keep track of people's phone numbers. Plus, I know a lot of cute girls, and I like to look at their photos a lot and get ideas on new outfits to wear.
|Mike Love<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|Just a gosh-darn minute. People Pretend to be Other People online, even Computers have been Programmed to pretend to be People to tease and get personal information from you. And Trolls/Cyber-Bullies Hack into YOUR Facebook and MySpace, rearranging, smearing, soiling with pornographic, most horrible images from the darkest regions of the internet. And they create [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|wiki]] [[CWCki|sites]] and pages of Hate against you soo horrible that Googling your own name results in MILLIONS of hate-filled results.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

''Note: Almost all google searches for variations of Chris-Chan (Christian Weston Chandler, CWC, Chris Chandler, etc.) consist mostly of pages mentioning other people such as Chris Chan Lee, people with the name Christian, Christianity, acronyms for companies, and other miscellaneous results. The actual amount of hate-filled results probably ranges in the tens of thousands, not the millions. A ten second examination of the results would easily prove this but Chris has [[PS3|more important]] things to do.''

{{quoteboxred|'''by BornThisWay » Tue Jun 21, 2011 11:53 pm'''

Like I said, it's really, really sad that you're putting your fears in the way of getting in touch with your old friends and establishing new friendships. I'll bet your old friends think about you sometimes and miss you. And like it or not, people use social networking sites to contact people they know in real life to do things in real life. This is the way things are now.

I don't get how somebody who has enough courage to dress up in women's clothing and walk around in public and use the girl's bathroom can be so afraid of somebody making fun of them on the internet. I mean, who would even know who your old friends are? Why would somebody go through the trouble of impersonating them? And wouldn't you like, be able to figure out if it was somebody pretending to be them? I mean their Facebook profile would link back to all their friends and most of their family members. They'd not only have to fool you, but their parents and relatives, who have known them since they were born. Like, if somebody tried to set up a phony profile and pretended to be me just to hate on me, everybody would know that something was off.

So like, you've though about one bad thing that could happen if you tried to look up old friends on Facebook, and just assumed that it will happen. And you said you're afraid of getting to close to males in real life, because you think something bad might happen. It's really easy to worry and make up excuses about why you can't do things, but just know that if you do that anxiety is going to rule your life.

Like I said you believe in yourself enough to admit that you're a Tomgirl and get out there and strut your stuff. Some Tomgirls don't even get that far! Think about how much you've already accomplished before deciding what you can and can't do. You're your own boss and I can't make you do anything, I'm just saying your life would be a lot less lonely if you were open to looking up the old friends you've fallen out of touch with over the years.|BornThisWay<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Wed Jun 22, 2011 1:31 am'''

Maybe I've just been lucky and haven't met anyone who has lied to me online. I use facebook to keep in contact with the people I'm close to, they've made it so easy to keep track of my friends, why wouldn't I take advantage of it. As far as having problems with meeting anyone online. I met Suchin here on the forum, and I had no trouble meeting up with her. There are always going to be assholes out there Kooky, but you can show them that they are just haters and you aren't going to listen to them.
|Tippy<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Thoria » Wed Jun 22, 2011 2:34 am'''
I just use FB in private mode, that way haters can't see what I'm doing and I only have my closest friends on there.
|Thoria<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

At this point Chris loses all self-control and does everything short of posting "I am Christian Weston Chandler, I am famous on the internet and trolls pick on me".

{{quotebox|It's not just THOUGHT, but it HAS happened to me before for real. And if you don't believe, take for example the author of the comic book series featuring that yellow, [[electric hedgehog]]... [[Sonichu]], if I remember correctly.

Before a time, the author had a clean history, then Cyber-Bullies and Trolls attacked him greatly; now Googling his name will result in over a million results of hate and name soiling. Especially from the blackmail and deceptions he had to endure.

I, myself, had a page on Facebook. Things were good for me a while. Then I was attacked in [[2005]] by the Trolls. They pretended to be my closest friends; they got a number of incriminating photos and details from me. They also hacked into my Facebook. It took me over a week before I was able to reset my password and e-mail address. And upon reflection, I closed my Facebook account and left the online socializing for years. It is real, and they are vicious, crazy, wickedly smart people.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

===Re: Reputation===
In which Chris actually says "I am Christian Weston Chandler, I am famous on the internet and trolls pick on me". He also tries to incite the forum into hacking CWCki for him.

{{quotebox|This Arthur has a good idea with this "DOS". He certainly knows more than I have on taking down their Trolling Stupid websites.

My Tomgirl and Tomboy acquaintances, I feel it is time I introduce myself better. I am more than just a Tomgirl. I am the high-functioning autistic person who was heavily emotionally damaged, artistic inspiration lost with paranoia, deception, blackmail and plain hurtful words from those bottom-feeding Trolls. I am the hand-drawing original creator of Sonichu, Rosechu and the city of Cwcville, Virginia, USA.

I am Christian Weston Chandler of Ruckersville, VA.

I had joined this Forum with the opportunity to associate with my own misunderstood kind of people, commonly mistaken for amongst the gays and lesbians. I concealed my identity on here reasonably, prayfully Not to be found by those Trolls.

For Years, I have fallen victim to their trachery. I have tried within my own limited knowledge and technology to counter-attack those fiends. I have mostly failed. And as a result, my reputation on the internet fell deep into their treacherous exaggerations, lies and crap. If I had any knowledge or technology, I would have hacked into and destroy every one of their webpages, servers and whatnot looong ago, but I did and still do not. All I could do in the end was hide in the old-fashioned (as it would appear to be now) world of Real Life, off of the internet. Yet I am one who does not like to be left behind in the modern world.

Also, because of them, it has been Impossible for me to get a job; damned negative background checks. And I would appreciate reducing the results of my full name from over Two Freaking Million results back down to less than 100.

Now that they have found me on here, y'all have been dragged into my darkness; for that, I feel deep shame and regret, and I am really sorry about that.

I am Not the disgruntled, mean or perverted person they have mislabeled of me; I am only a normal, heterosexual, good natured, high-functioning autistic Tomgirl, and I want to be treated like a normal person.

And I wish I do not have to be paranoid of those fiends and their hurtful webpages.<ref>http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=490#p490</ref>}}

Unaware of the horrible truth, members promise to help.

{{quoteboxred|'''by Thoria » Thu Jul 21, 2011 11:22 pm'''
Well Chris, you won't have to worry about this "CWCki" for much longer. Trust me on that, we'll take care of it. I have a cousin who's into computers and stuff, he took a Computer Science III course. I'll give him a shout and see if he can do something. If I were those trolls I'd be shivering in my boots right now.}}

Chris demonstrates a feeling resembling gratitude, but also seems to be preparing himself to sit down and wait for a solution to come to him.

{{quotebox|Thank you. Any help in this old battle to finally put it to rest would bebgreatly appreciated.

[[Chris and religion|God bless us all]].}}

One of them quickly catches up, however:

{{quoteboxred|'''by SexBomb33 » Sat Jul 23, 2011 2:42 am'''
Aren't you going to help us fight ''your'' battle in any way?}}

Chris explains why:

{{quotebox|As I have said before, I have tried on my own to counter-attack, and I still lack knowledge and resourses within my reach to counter-attack properly. And I do not have a functional Personal Computer or a Laptop of any kind. I have been posting from my 3DS internet browser, and it, my Wii, PS3, PSP at my house and one of the computers at the nearby library, which requires Gasoline to get to, are my current ONLY connection methods to the internet.

At this point, technology-wise and mentally autistic with the missing links in my Corpus Callosum, I do not feel fit to be an adaquate leader in taking down the frigging cyber-bullies and trolls.

I do have intel from my own experiences and past research which hopefully can be helpful. I'd recommend starting at [[The GAMe PLACe|the Game & Hobby Place]] in Charlottesville, across from the Omni hotel. I have been banned from there in April, [[2008]] by the [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|cold-hearted]] [[Michael Snyder]]. My family and I know that in a great way, that Place IS a central or focal point of the Trolls' plottings and/or such.

PLUS, it AND the other three associated hobby stores on their same website are ALL owned by a convicted-in-Illinois sex offender, Robert Lightfire. The Place is located across the street from a Public School; morally and legally, the Place should NOT be located there at all. Yet Mr. Lightburn is listed as an Offender in Illinois; he isn't listed in VA. He lives in Madison. I am positive, aside from him being married, Mr. Snyder has his own equatable criminal scandal.

That's all I have for now.<ref>http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=522#p522</ref>}}

Chris will be helped by TRUE and HONEST people in this fight. As in, they will do it for him if he can help (i.e., never)

{{quoteboxred|'''by DanielleTheRiveter » Fri Jul 29, 2011 1:21 am'''
Don't worry about it, Chris. I'm sure Thoria's cousin can help you out. He's been good to me in the past I'm sure that he's an Honest and Helpful fellow.

I'm sure that you'll be free of those trolls soon and I'm glad that you've trusted us with this. You're a good friend. Thoria's cousin has enough tech ability. He can walk you through it as long as you have the intel and can help him out a little bit.}}

==See also==
*[[Sonichu Girls]]
*[[Tomgirl Pictures]]
*[[Trollin' Train]]

==References==
<references/>

==External links==
<s>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/ Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia]</s> Non-existent as of late 2011

<s>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/memberlist.php?mode=viewprofile&u=95 Chris's profile]</s> See above

[[Category:Historical Documents]]
[[Category:Homos]]
[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Websites]]

Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia

2011-12-12T18:38:19Z

Croatchu: Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia no longer exists

{{Articleofthenow}}
'''Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia''' was a forum that was established in late [[April 2011]] and ceased to exist later that year<ref>http://www.forumer.com/forum-error.php?u=tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com</ref>. [[Chris]] was posting as himself under the alias "Kookydashy". This resulted in several stories of his exploits as a [[tomgirl]] that, to say the least, made the effort of tracking him down more than worth it. Chris posted on and off, trying his best to conceal his identity in the most obvious way possible. Below are his T&ToV posts, with blue representing Chris' posts and red representing posts in the threads he was responding to.

== Posts ==
===Re: Introductions!===
In which Chris openly announces he is Christian Weston Chandler as much as he can without actually saying it.

[[Image:ponyboy.jpg|thumb|[[My Little Pony|Kookydashy]]: Interests include [[Plush Breasts of Fail|breasts]], [[China|pussy]], and [[Autism Awareness E-mails|autism awareness]].]]

{{quotebox|Hello, fellow tomgirls. :)

Y'all may address me by my screen name in the board talk. I like [[Chris and Music|music]], [[Kaka Makeup Basics|makeup]], [[Chris and Fashion|dressin' up]] in my mini, [[Mass Debating|havin' fun]] 'n hangin' with my [[Gal-pals|girlfriend]]s, [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys|karaoke]], [[video games]], crafting and [[art]].

I am also empathetic, so [[Autism|I can understand others people's feelings]], as well as my own. I am a dynamic, complex individual.

I do not have many [[jerks|dude pals]], because I have my own mental hang-ups against the majority of them; Nothing Personal. I have a history of being bullied by some mean brutes, as well as [[homos|homosexuals]], over the [[internet]]. Cyber-Bullies/[[Trolls]]/Anons are a hot button with me. I prefer not to discuss that issue further.

And I am an all-around good, [[death threats|friendly]], [[List of Chris's lies|honest]], [[Vibrator|heterosexual]] tomgirl.

Thank you all for offering me respect, as I respect each of you and your opinions on the board.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=2&p=157#p157]</ref>}}

===Re: Coming out to my parents===
In this thread, Chris opened up about his parents' feelings in regards to his newfound fetish.

{{quotebox|Y'all are singin' my song; my [[Barb|mom]] and [[Bob|dad]] were shocked bad when I told them I was a tomgirl. Soo Literally old-fasioned (they're both [[Chris and English|seinors]]). My mom said "I didn't raise a daughter", and my father threw the damned "fag" card at me.

I will Always be Straight, Mom and Dad; give me some faith and trust.

What a world with outside influances to put great paranoia in our families.

Also, try looking up "tomgirl" on [[Wikipedia]]; it redirects to "effeminancy". While effeminancy is true for us, I feel the contents of that page is against us, due to it addressing the [[homos]].

Someone needs to undo the redirects, edit the grammer errors in "tomgirl"`s original edit, and add a ton more detail to it.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=3&p=160#p160]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|My mom is still giving me complaints and nit-picks about me wearing my feminine attire. I wish I could just up and move out and not have to deal with my family; I don't know too many other people here in C-Ville, and those I do know I'm only acquainted with or know little about them for only a few weeks.

Plus finding employment is hard. I got a [[CADD|fancy computer degree]] from [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|community college]], and there have been very slim pickings from it. Already Taken; Quota's Filled; yada, yada, yada.

Plus also, she keeps throwing disbelief towards us by stating "Tomgirls aren't real"; SHE'S a Tomboy; what a bunch of 1940's old-fashioned crap. Plus she watches too much current news, and she is soo paranoid and shit.

I wish I could afford to move out, but I can't afford it [[monthly tugboat|financially]], [[Autism|mentally]] and [[Chris and anger|emotionally]]. Fucking [[stress|pisses me off.]]<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=3&start=20]</ref>}}

===Re: Girly Things Tee Hee===

{{quotebox|After I realized my tomgirly ways, and starting dressing up in my skirts, I started feeling discomfort in using the Men's restroom. I asked my closest gal pal if it would be going too far in using the Ladies' room; she told me to go with my feelings. My next skirted outting, I used the ladies' room, and I squatted, holding my [[duck|arrow]] down over the john (so I would be less likely to soil my skirt); it felt good and Right. Days later, though, after 4 more lady trips; a woman complains and tattles on me, and a stereotypical [[jerk|Brute male]] shouts me out. I felt embarassed. When in skirt, I am still gonna go to the Ladies, because there is no goin' back for me.

Heck, I would not hold it against a tomboy who felt more comfort in using the Men's room over the Ladies'.

As truest Tomgirls, we do respect greatly the women as equals. [[lie|I would never look]] or anything of the sort.

Open for your thoughts.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=20&p=162#p162]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|I've recently got into the original Squinkies, they are so cute and cool. And their gumball-machine dispensing playsets are neat. I like the cupcake-shaped one. And they're also coming out with Squinkie cars for Hot Wheels and Cars 2; little Squinkie people now have cool wheels to drive.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=20&start=10]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|Something else girly I enjoy danglin' around where I go is my ankle bracelet. It's a silver chain with sections of 4 silver beads, and I've added three stars on chains onto the hook. I never take it off, because it is an awesome and cute jewelry, plus it is difficult to put it back on. LOL

I also am enjoying the "Mighty Milky Way" DSiWare game on my [[Nintendo|3DS]]. Luna is a cute, sexy gal, and the method of guiding her from planet to planet is neat.

Anyone else on here with a 3DS may add me onto y'all's Friend List with my code, 2836-0121-9073. Please P.M. me with your 3DS F.C. in response if y'all add me.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=20&p=382#p382]</ref>}}

===Re: Homosexuals===
[[Image:TG20.jpg|thumb|Hear that, homos? Chris is offended by your flamboyance!]]
{{quotebox|I do not care much for the [[homosexual]] males either. I mean, I really feel offended when they get soo flamboyant with their ways and such, it's like they're shoving it in your face. Plus, most of the Cyber-Bullies who gave me grief were homos [[Jack Thaddeus|themselves]], placing their damn label onto me wrongfully.

As long as they each keep it to themselves and behind closed doors, I won't bother them.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=20&p=162#p162]</ref>}}

===Re: July Meetup===

{{quoteboxred|'''by DanielleTheRiveter » Sun May 29, 2011 9:58 pm'''

That's right, everyone. It's that time again. Time to plan our big meet up for July. We're currently looking to meet up somewhere that's kinda central and should be easy for everyone.

First off, remember to dress your best. I'm going to wear my old dress uniform like normal but if you'd like to give us a sneak peak of your outfit, please feel free to do so here.

Also, any suggestions for Date / Time / Location is welcome.

Looking forward to seeing everyone there!|DanielleTheRiveter<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=27&p=229#p229]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|How about at the [[Two's_company_snapshots|Applebees]] next to Toys 'R' Us on Branchlands Lane on a Monday; at 9 PM, they have Karaokee night there. Meet and greet first and sing-along after.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=27&p=229#p229]</ref>}}

===Re: FUKKEN HATERSSSssssssssss===
In which Chris fantasizes about an unrealistic encounter with a "hater", then throws in some unintelligible [[Random-access humor|RAH]].

{{quotebox|I would generally ignore the haters' hurtful comments and move forward too. But if they are really in my face calling me gay or telling me [[virgin|I won't be geeting a woman]], I would tell them like it is in my miniskirt, "All I have to do is lift up my skirt and I'll be up your woman's biz in seconds." :)<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=32&p=291#p291]</ref>}}

===Re: What part of Virginia are you from?===

{{quotebox|Charlottesville is my city of stompin' ground; it can stand some improvement, though. More excitement, and maybe a strip club or two. LOL.

I've also resided in Midlothian for my Middle and [[High School]] years.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=35&p=292#p292]</ref>}}

===Re: 10 interesting facts about you!===
Unsurprisingly the most bland, useless information is considered by Chris to be an "interesting fact"

{{quotebox|[[Autism|1.]] I like to take my time to think of how I feel about the current topic, as well as responding in discussion.

[[Lie|2.]] I am empathetic.

[[Fat|3.]] I appreciate how the fast food places wised up and started offering apple slices as a healthier option after decades of fried potatoes.

[[Trolls|4.]] With my history of being trolled and online coomunicating, I feel online socializing only makes people more autistic-like. People need to wise up and go back to feeling comfortable socializing in person.

[[Cwcsicle|5.]] I have sassy, fun ideas sometimes.

[[Sonichu|6.]] I am good at hand-drawing, coloring and story creating.

[[Manchester High School|7.]] I have had happy years in High School.

[[Autism|8.]] I try to be cautious of other people's intentions and feelings while communicating and coping with them.

[[Lie|9.]] I am technologically and musically inclined.

[[Chris and Art|10.]] I enjoy tinkering and creating when I feel inspired.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=34&p=293#p293]</ref>}}

===Re: tomboy looking 4 tomgirl===
[[Image:Suchin.jpg|thumb|Suchin]]

{{quoteboxred|'''by William » Sun May 29, 2011 2:44 am'''

hello my name is suchin and i am originally from thailand. my friends call me william or will because i am rowdy and like to have fun i am looking for tomgirl to treat me right. i work in manicure salon now and i love beauty on my men and dirt on me

[image]

this is me. what is you? lets meet up and exchange details. i am from richmond but will be in charlottesville for the 4th of july. i love freedom now too.
your turn now! fi dorrar. sacki aur bunti. PLEASE send me a message!|William<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|There is a pretty face, lovely head of [[hair]] and [[Women's Rights|a nice rack]] in the photo. But I feel I have to interject here.

How do we know you are really that woman, or are you really some immature, trolling stupid brat trying to stir trouble on our forum? People have done that sort of thing over the internet; I fell victim to communicating with such people. And from that, I have learned to keep most personal things offline and to myself.

Anyway, I am not going to fall for such an obvious facade, and I wish to prevent anyone else from finding such gross disappointment and disaster.

Fess up, man.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Thu Jun 09, 2011 3:27 am '''

Hey I'm going to be down in Richmond tomorrow anyway, I think you're pretty cute so I'd like to meet up if possible.

I understand if this is kind of sudden, but when I saw that picture I just knew I had to meet this woman.|Tippy<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by William » Thu Jun 09, 2011 3:33 am'''

kookydashy your comment make me so sad? i work so hard on my body to be my tomboy self and i am so tired of others putting me down for me being me. sometimes i think it because they jealous but for you to accuse me of being troll, someting i hate most in whole american world, make me cry some. this remind me of my sister telling me i cannot wear pants because i am woman. i can wear pants AND NOT BE MAN OR UGLY!!!!

as for Tippy, you sound so nice. I would love to meet a creature like you in reality world! i would even love to do your hair and nails and so much more... I am excite now! Yes! Please! I get out of work at around six. Can we do drinkies than??
|William<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Thu Jun 09, 2011 3:38 am'''

OMG that's perfect, I'm supposed to have an early dinner meeting with a supplier, so I will be free right around six. I'll private message you my cell number and other info so we can exchange our numbers and stuff. I am so excited, I cannot wait. I will be counting down the hours till we meet up my Tomboy dream. We'll have drinks, and maybe dessert ;). Hehehehe|Tippy<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by William » Thu Jun 09, 2011 3:44 am'''

AHHHHHHHHHH!!!! Sawatdee kaa!! <3 You are true lady AND gentleman! I will call you tonight to confirm our time together with one another for tomorrow! You have dried every tear of mine so quick and make me smile bright bright bright... I cannot wait to smile more with you! xx|William<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

[[Image:Suchin 2.jpg|thumb|Suchin]]

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Fri Jun 10, 2011 6:00 pm'''

Hey everyone, I have a major update.

So after my meeting with the supplier, who I sweet talked into giving me a discounted rate, I met up with Suchin for drinks. Let me just say Tomboys and Tomgirls, the photos do not do her justice, she looks absolutely incredible. She gave me some great tips on keeping my pedicures lasting longer, we talked about every subject imaginable, and I hope she doesn't mind me saying this, but I am totally crushing on her right now, and cannot wait to see her again. The drive home from Richmond felt like nothing because of how happy I am right now.

Plus I'll always have this picture to remember our incredible night by.

Tippy<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by William » Fri Jun 10, 2011 7:33 pm'''

Yes, it very true ! Tippy you steal my heart and not ever let go! I am happy this way. I love sharing all my pretty lingerie with Tippy and I teach my new Tomgirl how to do Thai lap dance. We are so sensual and one. Tippy and I are item now!! NO TOUCHING! Thank you TBS and TGS of Virgina! <3 xoxo|William<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Fri Jun 10, 2011 7:40 pm'''

Suchin, you catty gal, I thought you were gonna let me announce to the forum that we were an item. It's ok, I still love you. And I can't wait until the next time we're together so I can give you that massage while you play your video games. I've never felt this happy, like this may be the greatest day of my entire life. I've met a lot of girls in my life, but Suchin, you are my woman, my strong, masculine, tomboy woman. I can't wait to see you next weekend, I've already talked to my boss, and I'm getting Friday off so we can spend the whole day together.

I never thought I'd be able to find love on an internet forum, and here we are, happy as can be. Thank you Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virgina, I hope the rest of you find your Tomboys and Tomgirls soon.
|Tippy<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|It looks like I stand corrected of my suspicions. But with my past experiences, and the too great number of crazy people in the world, we all have to be very cautious. And with that, I apologize for my earlier post and hurting your feelings, Suchin.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=26&p=311#p311]</ref>}}

===Re: Manicure/Pedicure stories?===
{{quotebox|I have colored my nails before, and it is fun to do for a grand outting.

I feel it ill for me to go in for a manicure, not only due to lack of funds, but I am a recovering nail-biter. I even had to have a fingernail replaced in surgery years ago; it is growing in well, even though slower than the other nine.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=37&p=312#p312]</ref>}}

===Re: Mothers===
{{quotebox|My mother has tried to coerce me into going back to [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|briefs]]; Hells No! Panties are far more comfortable And stylish. And I am not going to ever go out without one of my [[muscle bra|sports bras]] again. She even tried to bribe, or wager, me, but I would not take it.

I feel there should be a law requiring all men to wear bras (sports ones at least); I feel grossed out whenever I see some dude walking sround shirtless. ]:(P<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=7&t=39&p=315#p315]</ref>}}

===Re: Friendship Issues===
{{quotebox|I'd like to talk a bit about those of us (well, me in particular) who have for real only less than or equal to a handful of friends in person.

Growing up, I have had mostly [[gal-pals|female friends]]. I was considerably blessed, yet I still lack the virgin-breaker moment. The close friendships were great, and I really appreciated them in my heart forever. I really should have tried to get further, but before 21, I was [[naive]] on the subject of dating. There Really should be a manditory [[dating education]] class alongside sex ed.

I have known all of my life that I do get along better with women well over those of my own gender. No personal offense to anyone.

I have a mental flaw, along with other learnings, which has taught me that most of the worldwide male poulation are, pretty much, Uncaring, Violent, Ignorant, Dumb, Boring Jerks. And with that, I feel afraid in meeting most males, because I feel ill of getting too close, because of me getting hurt, or something else god-awful. ]:(

Again, no personal offense is meant to anyone.

My gal pal has informed me that me meeting more women and getting it on is very unlikely if I do not have many dude pals. Nutshell; I would be mistaken for a homo, or too easily [[friend zone|friend-zoned]] by women. This tid bit makes me feel sad.

Open for individual responses from Everyone on this forum.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by BornThisWay » Sun Jun 19, 2011 12:24 am'''

Aww, that sux!!!! Anyway I met most of my friends back in high school, or college, or at my past jobs. Sometimes it's hard to keep in touch with everybody but that's why the [[Internet]] and phones were invented! A lot of the friends I hang out with now were from my last job. We'd go out for drinks every Thursday, Friday and Saturday and have the grandest of times! Sometimes I still meet up with them, but not every week like I used to.

As for meeting people, I've never really thought about it because I'm not a really shy person. I guess if you strike up conversations based on stuff you like or stuff you notice about them, that's a good start. It's real easy to sit in your room all day and play video games but you just have to talk to people and get out there. Sometimes I'll just go out all by myself and sit someplace nice and quiet and read. If you look cute sometimes people come up and introduce themselves!

But anyway if you haven't done it already you should get on [[Facebook]] and try to find your old friends and tell them what you've been up to since you've last seen them! It's a really easy way to keep in touch with people especially since a lot of people move away right after high school or college. Facebook is like a high school reunion that never ends! (Sorry if I sound like a commercial!) Plus if there's anyone who still lives in Virginia maybe they can introduce you to some of their single friends! Just be yourself and let us know what they say, ok?|BornThisWay<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|"Social" websites like Facebook and [[MySpace]] are ALL a Joke against socializing. Everybody is on the internet these days. And to Socialize online with total strangers Constantly is an epic fail. That kind of "socializing" on the internet will only result in making people more and more Autistic-Like. Think about it.

The more time we spend in front of an internet screen leads to constant lack of practice in REAL Socializing face to face offline.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Mike Love » Tue Jun 21, 2011 5:23 am'''

I like Facebook. There's a lot of people I don't nescesarilly talk to a lot, but I like to be able to keep up with what they're doing. Plus it makes it easier to keep track of people's phone numbers. Plus, I know a lot of cute girls, and I like to look at their photos a lot and get ideas on new outfits to wear.
|Mike Love<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

{{quotebox|Just a gosh-darn minute. People Pretend to be Other People online, even Computers have been Programmed to pretend to be People to tease and get personal information from you. And Trolls/Cyber-Bullies Hack into YOUR Facebook and MySpace, rearranging, smearing, soiling with pornographic, most horrible images from the darkest regions of the internet. And they create [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|wiki]] [[CWCki|sites]] and pages of Hate against you soo horrible that Googling your own name results in MILLIONS of hate-filled results.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

''Note: Almost all google searches for variations of Chris-Chan (Christian Weston Chandler, CWC, Chris Chandler, etc.) consist mostly of pages mentioning other people such as Chris Chan Lee, people with the name Christian, Christianity, acronyms for companies, and other miscellaneous results. The actual amount of hate-filled results probably ranges in the tens of thousands, not the millions. A ten second examination of the results would easily prove this but Chris has [[PS3|more important]] things to do.''

{{quoteboxred|'''by BornThisWay » Tue Jun 21, 2011 11:53 pm'''

Like I said, it's really, really sad that you're putting your fears in the way of getting in touch with your old friends and establishing new friendships. I'll bet your old friends think about you sometimes and miss you. And like it or not, people use social networking sites to contact people they know in real life to do things in real life. This is the way things are now.

I don't get how somebody who has enough courage to dress up in women's clothing and walk around in public and use the girl's bathroom can be so afraid of somebody making fun of them on the internet. I mean, who would even know who your old friends are? Why would somebody go through the trouble of impersonating them? And wouldn't you like, be able to figure out if it was somebody pretending to be them? I mean their Facebook profile would link back to all their friends and most of their family members. They'd not only have to fool you, but their parents and relatives, who have known them since they were born. Like, if somebody tried to set up a phony profile and pretended to be me just to hate on me, everybody would know that something was off.

So like, you've though about one bad thing that could happen if you tried to look up old friends on Facebook, and just assumed that it will happen. And you said you're afraid of getting to close to males in real life, because you think something bad might happen. It's really easy to worry and make up excuses about why you can't do things, but just know that if you do that anxiety is going to rule your life.

Like I said you believe in yourself enough to admit that you're a Tomgirl and get out there and strut your stuff. Some Tomgirls don't even get that far! Think about how much you've already accomplished before deciding what you can and can't do. You're your own boss and I can't make you do anything, I'm just saying your life would be a lot less lonely if you were open to looking up the old friends you've fallen out of touch with over the years.|BornThisWay<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Tippy » Wed Jun 22, 2011 1:31 am'''

Maybe I've just been lucky and haven't met anyone who has lied to me online. I use facebook to keep in contact with the people I'm close to, they've made it so easy to keep track of my friends, why wouldn't I take advantage of it. As far as having problems with meeting anyone online. I met Suchin here on the forum, and I had no trouble meeting up with her. There are always going to be assholes out there Kooky, but you can show them that they are just haters and you aren't going to listen to them.
|Tippy<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

{{quoteboxred|'''by Thoria » Wed Jun 22, 2011 2:34 am'''
I just use FB in private mode, that way haters can't see what I'm doing and I only have my closest friends on there.
|Thoria<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

At this point Chris loses all self-control and does everything short of posting "I am Christian Weston Chandler, I am famous on the internet and trolls pick on me".

{{quotebox|It's not just THOUGHT, but it HAS happened to me before for real. And if you don't believe, take for example the author of the comic book series featuring that yellow, [[electric hedgehog]]... [[Sonichu]], if I remember correctly.

Before a time, the author had a clean history, then Cyber-Bullies and Trolls attacked him greatly; now Googling his name will result in over a million results of hate and name soiling. Especially from the blackmail and deceptions he had to endure.

I, myself, had a page on Facebook. Things were good for me a while. Then I was attacked in [[2005]] by the Trolls. They pretended to be my closest friends; they got a number of incriminating photos and details from me. They also hacked into my Facebook. It took me over a week before I was able to reset my password and e-mail address. And upon reflection, I closed my Facebook account and left the online socializing for years. It is real, and they are vicious, crazy, wickedly smart people.<ref>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=48&p=405#p405]</ref>}}

===Re: Reputation===
In which Chris actually says "I am Christian Weston Chandler, I am famous on the internet and trolls pick on me". He also tries to incite the forum into hacking CWCki for him.

{{quotebox|This Arthur has a good idea with this "DOS". He certainly knows more than I have on taking down their Trolling Stupid websites.

My Tomgirl and Tomboy acquaintances, I feel it is time I introduce myself better. I am more than just a Tomgirl. I am the high-functioning autistic person who was heavily emotionally damaged, artistic inspiration lost with paranoia, deception, blackmail and plain hurtful words from those bottom-feeding Trolls. I am the hand-drawing original creator of Sonichu, Rosechu and the city of Cwcville, Virginia, USA.

I am Christian Weston Chandler of Ruckersville, VA.

I had joined this Forum with the opportunity to associate with my own misunderstood kind of people, commonly mistaken for amongst the gays and lesbians. I concealed my identity on here reasonably, prayfully Not to be found by those Trolls.

For Years, I have fallen victim to their trachery. I have tried within my own limited knowledge and technology to counter-attack those fiends. I have mostly failed. And as a result, my reputation on the internet fell deep into their treacherous exaggerations, lies and crap. If I had any knowledge or technology, I would have hacked into and destroy every one of their webpages, servers and whatnot looong ago, but I did and still do not. All I could do in the end was hide in the old-fashioned (as it would appear to be now) world of Real Life, off of the internet. Yet I am one who does not like to be left behind in the modern world.

Also, because of them, it has been Impossible for me to get a job; damned negative background checks. And I would appreciate reducing the results of my full name from over Two Freaking Million results back down to less than 100.

Now that they have found me on here, y'all have been dragged into my darkness; for that, I feel deep shame and regret, and I am really sorry about that.

I am Not the disgruntled, mean or perverted person they have mislabeled of me; I am only a normal, heterosexual, good natured, high-functioning autistic Tomgirl, and I want to be treated like a normal person.

And I wish I do not have to be paranoid of those fiends and their hurtful webpages.<ref>http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=490#p490</ref>}}

Unaware of the horrible truth, members promise to help.

{{quoteboxred|'''by Thoria » Thu Jul 21, 2011 11:22 pm'''
Well Chris, you won't have to worry about this "CWCki" for much longer. Trust me on that, we'll take care of it. I have a cousin who's into computers and stuff, he took a Computer Science III course. I'll give him a shout and see if he can do something. If I were those trolls I'd be shivering in my boots right now.}}

Chris demonstrates a feeling resembling gratitude, but also seems to be preparing himself to sit down and wait for a solution to come to him.

{{quotebox|Thank you. Any help in this old battle to finally put it to rest would bebgreatly appreciated.

[[Chris and religion|God bless us all]].}}

One of them quickly catches up, however:

{{quoteboxred|'''by SexBomb33 » Sat Jul 23, 2011 2:42 am'''
Aren't you going to help us fight ''your'' battle in any way?}}

Chris explains why:

{{quotebox|As I have said before, I have tried on my own to counter-attack, and I still lack knowledge and resourses within my reach to counter-attack properly. And I do not have a functional Personal Computer or a Laptop of any kind. I have been posting from my 3DS internet browser, and it, my Wii, PS3, PSP at my house and one of the computers at the nearby library, which requires Gasoline to get to, are my current ONLY connection methods to the internet.

At this point, technology-wise and mentally autistic with the missing links in my Corpus Callosum, I do not feel fit to be an adaquate leader in taking down the frigging cyber-bullies and trolls.

I do have intel from my own experiences and past research which hopefully can be helpful. I'd recommend starting at [[The GAMe PLACe|the Game & Hobby Place]] in Charlottesville, across from the Omni hotel. I have been banned from there in April, [[2008]] by the [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|cold-hearted]] [[Michael Snyder]]. My family and I know that in a great way, that Place IS a central or focal point of the Trolls' plottings and/or such.

PLUS, it AND the other three associated hobby stores on their same website are ALL owned by a convicted-in-Illinois sex offender, Robert Lightfire. The Place is located across the street from a Public School; morally and legally, the Place should NOT be located there at all. Yet Mr. Lightburn is listed as an Offender in Illinois; he isn't listed in VA. He lives in Madison. I am positive, aside from him being married, Mr. Snyder has his own equatable criminal scandal.

That's all I have for now.<ref>http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/viewtopic.php?p=522#p522</ref>}}

Chris will be helped by TRUE and HONEST people in this fight. As in, they will do it for him if he can help (i.e., never)

{{quoteboxred|'''by DanielleTheRiveter » Fri Jul 29, 2011 1:21 am'''
Don't worry about it, Chris. I'm sure Thoria's cousin can help you out. He's been good to me in the past I'm sure that he's an Honest and Helpful fellow.

I'm sure that you'll be free of those trolls soon and I'm glad that you've trusted us with this. You're a good friend. Thoria's cousin has enough tech ability. He can walk you through it as long as you have the intel and can help him out a little bit.}}

==See also==
*[[Sonichu Girls]]
*[[Tomgirl Pictures]]
*[[Trollin' Train]]

==References==
<references/>

==External links==
<s>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/ Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia]</s> Non-existent as of late 2011

<s>[http://tomboytomgirls.44.forumer.com/memberlist.php?mode=viewprofile&u=95 Chris's profile]</s> See above

[[Category:Historical Documents]]
[[Category:Homos]]
[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Websites]]

Sonichu and Rosechu's children

2011-12-12T18:15:27Z

Croatchu: Possible connection between Cerah and Christine since band formation

[[Image:Sr kids.JPG|thumb|350px||From left to right: Cera, Christine, Robbie.]]
[[File:425-CWCSNHP1.jpg|thumb|Evidence that even Robbie is (yet another) Mary Sue]]

'''Cerah Rosey''' (also spelled "'''Cera'''"), '''Christine Rosey''' and '''Robbie Sonee''' are the children of [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]]. Cerah is the oldest (born [[Sonichu chronology#2006|29 June 2006]], followed by Christine (b. 7 October 2006), and finally Robbie (b. 26 February 2007).<ref name=married>[[Sonichu#Married Life and Children]]</ref>

It is probable that Cerah is named after [[Sarah Hammer|Chris's childhood best friend]] and Robbie is named after either [[Bob|Chris's father]] or [[The Adventures of The American Rabbit|his childhood hero]]. Christine's name may come from the feminine variant of Christian's name (due to his [[Chris and ego|narcissism]]) or his obsession with the name "[[Crystal]]". It should be noted that while Chris was uploading images to use as thumbnails for his character bio pages, he attempted to display a non-existent image file entitled "''Crystal''Rosey.jpg" where a drawing of Christine should have gone.

They are identified by their whiny, high-pitched voices and irritating [[speech impediment]]s. It is notable that to date Sonichu or Rosechu have not been seen spending time with a child of the opposite gender. Rosechu spends large amounts of time with Cera and Christine [[Women's rights|in the kitchen]], while Sonichu and Robbie do manly activities such as gazing into each others' eyes and talking about their Wii.

The little shits end almost every statement with "Yay!" It should be noted that this is [[PS3 History Level|how Chris talks]], not how ''children'' talk. They are also known for their [[The Creepy Stare|creepy, blank expressions and soul-less eyes]].

The children are widely hated by ''everybody'', even more so than the other characters.

In [[November 2011]], it was revealed that they have evolved into '''Cera Rosechu''', '''Christine Rosechu''' and '''Robee Sonichu''' [sic], formed [[Robee Sonee and the Tomgirls|a band]] and that Robee has become a [[Tomgirl|cross-dresser]].

==Appearances==

[[Image:Virginmary.jpg|thumb|right|''Sonichu'': The comic that's not afraid to tackle child molestation.]]
[[Image:Thisemotionyoucallwuvconfusesandinfuriatesus.jpg|thumb|right|The only insectivore that will ever wuv Chris.]]

The kids' first prominent appearance is in the sign Chris drew to show his support for [[McIntire Park]]. They've also been seen in two pages of [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], as well as getting a quick mention on page 41 of the same issue. They spend the rest of their time being watched over by their Spanish [[lesbian]] nanny, [[Heather Iglesias]], while their neglectful parents waste time trying to assist their hideous father in his quest for [[Sonichu Balls|balls]].

The hellish abominations spawned from Rosechu's [[China|loins]] have also appeared in "[[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas Story]]", and in [[Sonichu 11|''Sonichu'' #11]]. Here we learn that Christine is no longer a [[Virgin with rage|virgin]], and Robbie replaces his R's with W's while speaking in an effort to be as saccharine and grating as possible. However, this could be interpreted as a way of Chris trying to pass of the extremely complex dialogue Robbie has as something a child would say, you know, because he's making malapropisms like those [[Wikipedia:Family Circus|melon-headed kids in the funnies]]. Cera (formerly Cerah) breaks the fourth wall to say "I wuv you!" to Chris.

Robbie makes a brief appearance in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], describing an incident which involved him pissing on a lizard. Needless to say, [[Patti-Chan|cruelty to animals]] is one of the early signs of a [[Death threats|potential psychopath]].<ref>[[:File:SchuComic10P36.jpg]]</ref>

The children also appear in Chris's [[:File:HelpHaitSonichu.jpg|disingenuous plea]] for helping Haiti.

==Shiny==
Christine is a "Shining" (or "Shiney"<ref>[[Katie Bay E-mails 4]]</ref> <nowiki>[</nowiki>[[Chris and English|sic]]<nowiki>]</nowiki>) Rosey according to Chris.<ref name=married /> Unsurprisingly, Chris has, yet again, ripped off an element of ''[[Pokémon]]'' canon (in the games, a Pokémon that has a different coloration from what is usual for its species is considered to be "[[User:Shiny|shiny]]"<ref>[http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Shiny_Pok%C3%A9mon]</ref>), because Chris lives, breathes, eats, and shits Pokémon. Chris also seems to believe that [[trolls|his readers]] are also Pokéfags like him, because he assumes that everyone understands what the term "shiny" means, and thus neglects to elaborate any further.

When confronted with the accusation of infidelity by a [[troll|close confidant]], Chris got indignant and stuck to his "shiny" alibi.<ref>[[Katie Bay E-mails 6]]</ref>

==Evolution==
[[Image:Robee_Sonee_and_the_Tomgirls_Bandmates.jpg|thumb|left|All gwown up! Yay!]]

On 12 [[November 2011]], it was revealed that not only have the children all evolved into adult forms, but have also formed a pop band: [[Robee Sonee and the Tomgirls]].

However, like [[Chris]], they seem to have devolved into something much more disturbing: Robbie has changed his name to "Robee" and has become a [[tomgirl]] (or the [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]] equivalent: Sonirose?) while Cera has become a [[gaybian|tomboy]]. The band name makes little sense, since it implies Cerah and Christine are tomgirls, or feminine boys. If this is to be believed, however, it would not be the first time Chris has created a [[Silvana|transsexual character that appeared female]].
{{clear}}

==Fan art==
[[Image:Robbieisadick.jpg|thumb|right|The ugly truth.]][[Image:Robbiesonee.png|thumb|right|Isn't he cute?]]

The children of Sonichu and Rosechu are also a popular subject for fanart. In [[August 2009]], a large volume of art depicting Sonichu and Rosechu's [[Sex#Pedophilia|frolicking]] children was emailed to Chris. [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 12th, 2009|He did not appreciate it,]] for some odd reason. Ironically, in a later comic, he all but confirmed this art as canon with the implication that Christine is not a virgin.

==References==
<references/>

==See also==
*[[Sonee & Rosey]]
*[[Sonichu]]
*[[Rosechu]]
*[[Guro]]
*[[CWC Update 12 August 2009]], in which Chris addresses the former.
*[[A Sonichu Day]]
*"[[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas Story]]"
*[[Robee Sonee and the Tomgirls]]
* Wikipedia article on ''[[wikipedia:The Lurking Fear|The Lurking Fear]]''

{{Sonichu}}

[[Category:Characters]]
[[Category:Imaginary Family Members]]
[[Category:Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]]

Bob Chandler

2011-12-12T17:18:03Z

Croatchu:

: ''"Bob" redirects here. For the troll occasionally known as Bob, see [[Robert Simmons V]].''
{{Articleofthenow}}

{{quote|It was an interesting life I had.|Bob, at peace.}}
{| class="infobox" style="width: 21em; font-size: 90%;"
|-
! colspan="2" | Chandler family
|-
| colspan="2" | [[Image:Chrischansdad.jpg|300px]]
|-
! colspan="2" |Bob Chandler
|-
| '''Birth name'''
| Robert Franklin Chandler Jr.
|-
| '''Nicknames'''
| [[Bob Walks In|Internet Lumberjack]]
[[Cole|[That fuck] Bob]]
|-
| '''Born'''
| 4 September [[Pre-1980#1920s|1927]]
|-
| '''Died'''
| 6 September [[2011]] (aged 84)
|-
| '''Gender'''
| Male
|-
| '''Nationality'''
| [[United States of America|American]]
|-
| '''Race'''
| White (1/4th [[Cherokee]]<ref name="About">[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript]]</ref>)
|-
| '''Marriage'''
| Patricia (????-????) 
[[Barb]] (1980-2011)
|-
| '''Issue'''
| Dr. David Alan Chandler 
Carol Suzanne Chandler 
[[Christian Weston Chandler]]
|-
| '''Parents'''
| Robert Franklin Chandler Sr. (father) Jean Holloman (mother)
|-
| '''Education'''
| Auburn University (engineering)
|-
| '''Occupation(s)'''
| Military communications, engineer
|-
|}
[[Image:DemonicLumberjack.jpg|thumb|'''The Internet Lumberjack''' in his final form]]
'''Robert Franklin Chandler Jr.'''<ref>[[Blanca E-mails#Chris likes Blanca|Email to Blanca]]</ref> (4 September [[Pre-1980#1920s|1927]]- 6 September [[2011]] <ref>http://www.harveypowers.com/wynn/wynn/d155.html#P155</ref>) was the father of [[Christian Weston Chandler]], [[Carol Chandler]] and [[David Alan Chandler]], and husband of [[Barbara Weston Chandler]]. Bob became a firm favorite with [[trolls]] due to Chris's intense dislike of him and Bob's infamous cameo when he walked in on Chris [[mass debating]].<ref>[[Bob Walks In]]</ref> His nickname, "the [[Internet]] Lumberjack," comes from this incident.

While loathed by and estranged from his other children and step-child, Bob was still viewed as a better parent than his wife [[Barbara]], due to him being somewhat concerned with Chris's current status as a [[virgin with rage]], and the fact that he occasionally tried to guilt him into being more considerate by bringing up the fact that he devoted 29 years to raising a selfish manchild. Of course, Chris was unfazed by these attempts.

Bob conversed with numerous trolls. A lot of information was gained from these chats, mostly due to his tendency to yammer on.

Bob died on 6 September 2011, at Martha Jefferson Hospital ICU surrounded by family, pastor and hospital staff.<ref name="BobObit">http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/dailyprogress/obituary.aspx?n=robert-franklin-chandler&pid=153539600</ref>

==Biography==
[[Image:GrandWizardBob.jpg|thumb|"I seen crosses burnin', fella."]]

===Service and education===

Bob was born in [[Wikipedia:Fort Worth, Texas|Fort Worth, Texas]]<ref name="Prank calls">[[Prank calls]]</ref> and raised in [[Wikipedia:Alabama|Alabama]].<ref name="About">[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#About Bob (7:18 - 16:45)]]</ref> His father was allegedly half Cherokee.

Bob was drafted after [[Wikipedia:World War II|World War II]] and placed in [[Wikipedia:Signal Corps (United States Army)|the Signal Corps]]. There, he learned how to install valve systems, switchboards, and telephones, and got to visit the beautiful [[CWCville|North Korea]]. When he got out, he couldn't get a job and so went to college on the [[Wikipedia:G.I. Bill|G.I. Bill]].<ref name="About" />

Since he figured he'd get "swallowed up" at a big college, Bob picked a small college to study pre-Engineering for two years. He was also in a band and learned a lot about [[music]]. He then moved onto [[Wikipedia:Auburn University|Auburn University]], a big college, to earn his engineering degree.<ref name="About" /> As an engineer, he never learned to spell properly.<ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#The Date Begins (4:47 - 7:17)]]</ref>

===Career===

Bob worked for [[Wikipedia:Western Electric|Western Electric]] for forty years. Using skills learned in the Army, he built for the company their first automatic [something] (it's unclear what Bob says here). General Electric heard about it and offered him a job in upstate New York. Since New York is too cold (and Yankee) for Bob, he moved away after three years, working in North Carolina for some time.<ref name="About" /> He worked with both Goodrich and Goodyear.<ref name="PSN 37" />

With General Electric, Bob was responsible for at least seven patents. [[Barbara]] claimed, in an e-mail to [[Miyamoto]], that because of Bob's influence in the computer world, the [[Wikipedia:Nintendo Entertainment System|NES]] "might not have arrived so soon" (despite video game technology actually being pioneered by [[Wikipedia:Ralph Baer|Ralph Baer]]).<ref name="Barbara" />

As examples of Bob's accom-PLISH-ments, as Chris would say, he automated a steel mill for rolling steel for cars, a paper mill for papers into the form of Kleenex, warehousing, railroads and tanker ships. He designed scooters, die casting machines, machines for producing plastic products<ref name="About" /> and a [http://www.google.com/patents/about?id=PIU_AAAAEBAJ vehicle logging system]. A fact that both Chris and Barbara have bragged about is that Bob designed [http://www.google.com/patents/about?id=vScrAAAAEBAJ controls] that were used in plastic water container molding machines.<ref name="About" /><ref name="Barbara">[[Miyamoto Saga#Barbara]]</ref>

===World consciousness===

[[Image:0012-BobbyReading.jpg|thumb|Bob learning how to cut that Internet down]]

On the other hand, Bob himself was proud of his "natural inclination for logic," although he was "inundated" by all his designs and whether he did good for the world.<ref name="About" />

Speaking of the world, Bob had been interested in it since he was 10, and had become very world conscious as a believer in the [[Wikipedia:United Nations|United Nations]]. He began by collecting foreign stamps in the [[1930s]]. He had collected 15,000–20,000 LPs from various genres and cultures.<ref name="PSN 37"/> Bob traveled the world in his day for business and [[china|pleasure]].

Politically, Bob identified as a [[Wikipedia:Republican Party (United States)|Republican]], and did not vote for [[Barack Obama]] in [[Wikipedia:United States presidential election, 2008|the 2008 presidential election]].<ref name="Prank calls"/>

In a potentially damaging moment on 18 [[February 2009]], Bob doubted the existence of [[Molvanîa]], [[Julie]]'s country of origin.<ref>[[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.5]]</ref> However, he continued talking under the assumption that Molvanîa was under Russian control.<ref name="PSN 37">[[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.7]]</ref>

===Health and late life===

[[Image:LumberjackTapestry.JPG|thumb|Robert had Medieval English ancestry]]
[[File:Heart15.jpg|thumb|Computer-generated model of Bob's near-shattered heart.]]
Bob lived on social security and his General Electric pension.<ref name="Raising">[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#Raising Chris-Chan (16:46 - 00:00)]]</ref> He never really had people to chat with (he loved to ramble if the person showed some slight interest), so he sat around, listened to music, and took care of the garden inside the greenhouse.<ref name="PSN 37" /> With a 1970s stereo system set up in the greenhouse, he went to "swing with the music" on his swing there.<ref name="Raising" />

Bob had had two triple bypasses and four heart attacks. He wore an [[Wikipedia:Artificial pacemaker|artificial pacemaker]].<ref>[[Mumble 3]]</ref> In a recent prank call, Bob revealed that after surgery for cancer it was discovered that he had a fluid build up in his legs which can cause heart failure. This rapid decline in health worried him.<ref name="Prank calls"/> He attributed his long life to the [[Cherokee]] in him. His uncles and grandfather all lived to 90-100.<ref name="PSN 37" /> The [[Rocky Shoemaker call]] revealed that Bob had previously been hospitalised for severe "bug bites".

A major question in the [[troll]] community is what will happen now that Bob has died.

===What about Bob?===

[[Image:Bobbetter.jpg|thumb|"Now will you PLEASE let me get back to God of War 3???"]]

On 1 [[March 2010]], Chris [[Twitter]]ed that Bob had been taken to the hospital in the early morning for "congested [''sic''] [[Wikipedia:Heart failure|heart failure]]". Chris seemed confident that his father would come home shortly. Considering Bob's age, lifestyle, and long history of heart disease, [[Chris and death|Chris did not seem to grasp the seriousness of heart failure in an elderly man]]. Before his death, Bob was the only thing keeping [[14 Branchland Court|the Chandler household]] from imploding, and as such, trolls and white knights alike wished him the best.

[[Image:Bobbed.jpg|thumb|Apart from the dying heart]]

In the month following Bob's hospitalization, Chris was remarkably quiet on the subject. Information about his condition was hard to come by, as we only learned something [[Ego|once it has inconvenienced Chris enough for him to come online and complain about it]]. Statistically, congestive heart failure is not as immediately fatal as its name implies.<ref>[[Wikipedia:Congenital Heart Failure|Congenital Heart Failure]]</ref> But again, Bob's age, prior heart attacks and lifestyle made this a serious matter.

Chris's videos over the month of March made no mention of Bob at all. Staying true to his painfully predictable nature, Chris instead lost a [[The Wallflower|girlfriend he never had]], [[Chris Drops the N-Bomb|made racial slurs and death threats to a cartoon character]], and [[F Abstinance|raged against abstinence]]. But no mention of his ailing father.

A poster on [[/cwc/]] contacted Chris via PSN regarding Bob. He posted a [http://www.cogsdev.org/w/images/9/9b/Bobbetter.jpg screen capture] of Chris's response, saying, "He is doing much better, thank you." [[Image:King.jpg|thumb|"Know this, Robert. Thy demise shall be a Whopper!"]]Another contacted Chris via email and got a response saying, "Yes, my father is healthy and safe." He was clearly neither at the time, but this was at least proof that Bob hadn't joined the Whites-Only section of Heaven just yet. In late May, Chris finally made [[Some Favored Comedians|a brief mention]] in a public video that his father was "alive and well," with no further elaboration on his condition.

On 6 September 2011, Bob died, presumably from congestive heart failure.<ref name="BobObit">http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/dailyprogress/obituary.aspx?n=robert-franklin-chandler&pid=153539600</ref> Luckily for Chris, he did not [[Aunt Corrina|die on pancake day]].

===BobWatch™===

On 10 August 2010, [[Matthew Noble call|a phone call]] took place between Bob and Alec Benson Leary, who posed as an employee of [[GAMe PLACe|The GAMe PLACe]]. Discussing Chris's June trespassing citation, it was discovered that Chris hadn't told his parents about the incident (surprise, surprise). Chris posted [[6 June 2010|a whiny video]] about the incident the night that it happened, which remained on his YouTube channel until he purged all of his videos on 22 November. Yeah, that's how negligent Bob was.

On 19 August 2010, it was revealed that the elderly man with heart failure was still [[Coffee Place|eating breakfast at Burger King]] on a daily basis. The Grim Reaper is said to have been pleased by this news.

On 24 March 2011, Bob claimed in a phone call to have cancer.<ref>http://youtu.be/y-GGSOyCm2k</ref>

On 20 July 2011, it was revealed that by that time [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia#Re: Coming out to my parents|Bob knew about Chris's cross-dressing tendencies]] and strongly disapproved of them.

On 29 August 2011, Chris [[Calling_Out#Response_to_ADF|mentioned in a video]] that his father was no longer getting out much because he was sickly and his feet were bloated. Foot swelling is a [http://www.cardioassoc.com/patient_pgs/conditions/congestive.asp symptom of late-stage congestive heart failure.] With his mobility limited, Bob became a shut in, which only compounded his heart problems. It was a rare occurrence of Chris legitimately acknowledging his dad's health was failing and an even rarer occurrence of him genuinely knowing of any situation around him.

On 6 September 2011, Bob died. Despite all the jokes made about Chris and his family, the death of a loved one is a very tragic event. Out of respect for him and his family, the CWCki was closed for a week, 12-19 September, with the start date coinciding with the day Bob's funeral service was held. Site visitors were directed to a page which simply read "'''Robert Franklin Chandler Jr. 1927-2011'''".<ref name="BobObit" />

==Obituary==
Both [[Barbara Chandler|Barb]] and Chris collaborated in writing Bob's obituary, which was published in two local papers. Main points of the obituary, apart from the standard birth date, date of death, and next of kin, include:

* Text going into unusual detail about what Bob did at General Electric. This includes an odd mention of Bob somehow being indirectly responsible for the [[Mumble 4|invention of a "simple plastic funnel".]]
* The location of the memorial service, "to follow on a later date", at [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church]], the church that Barb, Bob and Chris used to frequent together. This is the same church that [[Rocky Shoemaker]] counsels Chris from.
* A footnote asking readers to not donate flowers, but to donate money to Barbara and Chris. Given [[Chris and money|the money habits of Chris]] and Barb, the remaining Chandlers may be in a dire financial situation.

===Original text===
:''Robert Franklin Chandler Jr., 84, of Ruckersville, passed away the morning of Tuesday, September 6, 2011, at Martha Jefferson Hospital ICU surrounded by family, pastor and hospital staff.''

:''He was born on September 4, 1927, in Texas, the son of the late Robert Franklin Chandler Sr. and Jean Holloman Chandler. On June 7, 1980, he married Barbara Anne Weston, who survives. And the couple gave birth to a son, Christian Weston Chandler, who survives. Also surviving is ex-wife, Patricia, and their shared children, son, Dr. David Alan Chandler, survives, and daughter, Carol Suzanne Chandler, survives.''

:''He graduated from Auburn University with a degree in Engineering.''

:''He served in the United States Army Seoul Korea in the Signal Corp during the Korean War. He worked for General Electric as an Engineer with Steels, Plastics, etc. He also had patents for the controls for Plastic Molding Machines; without him, we would not have even a simple plastic funnel.''

:''Also surviving are granddaughter, Savannah Chandler, the daughter of David Alan Chandler and his wife, Kimberly.''

:''A funeral service will be held at Monticello Memory Gardens in Charlottesville, Virginia, 10 a.m. Monday, September 12, 2011. A memorial service to follow on a later date at Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church.''

:''Instead of flowers, you may make monetary donations to his widow, Barbara Chandler and son, Christian Chandler. <ref name="BobObit" />

==Relationships==

===Previous family===

Bob was previously married to a woman named Patricia.<ref name="BobObit" /> She's most likely the mother of his two other children, [[David Alan Chandler]] and [[Carol Suzanne Chandler]], with whom he was both out of contact in his later years.<ref name="Cole2">[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-2.PNG|6 March 2007 email, page 2]]</ref> For example, Chris did not know he had a niece named [[Savannah Chandler|Savannah]] until she was 8 years old.<ref>[[CWC's Diary#January 2004]]</ref>

===Barbara===

[[Image:0063-BobAndBarbaraNewLife.jpg|thumb|With [[barbara Chandler|Barb]]]]

Bob and [[Barbara]] met in a bar on a karaoke night. Barbara was there with friends and Bob was singing.<ref name="Mumble 3.5">[[Mumble 3.5]]</ref> According to Chris, Barbara did the [[How to Talk to Girls|pursuing]]: "She chased him down the hall." This is probably why he figures that he could get away with being passive in terms of courtship. In contrast, [[Cole|Cole's]] friend Chuck, who worked at the bar, has a vivid memory of them being drunk retards.<ref name="Cole2" /> They got married in 1980.<ref name="Mumble 3.5" />

According to Chris, Barbara did not have sex with Bob for at least two decades before his passing. They had been sleeping in separate rooms for the past few years.<ref>[[IRC (27 December 2008)]]</ref> This is possibly due to an attempt to avoid spawning another subhuman freak like Chris.

===Cole===
Bob married Barbara when her son [[Cole]] was 17, around the time Cole left to lead his own life.

Cole feels that Bob's bitterness worked to separate his relationship with his mother. Cole said he would celebrate<ref name="Cole2"/> "when that fuck Bob finally drops," <ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-07-24-3.PNG|Email from Cole to Chris]]</ref> but it is unknown if he has yet to as of 9 September 2011. Cole said that he and Bob shared a mutual hatred,<ref name="Cole2" /> though we have no evidence yet that Bob hated Cole. In the least, it is certain that Bob knew Cole didn't like him.<ref name="Raising"/>

===Chris===

{{quote|Get away from the Internet! I'm cutting it down, right now.|Bob Chandler, Internet lumberjack.}}

[[Image:0106-ChristianWDad.jpg|thumb|"You tell them that you fell down some stairs or else I'm cutting down your [[Nintendo]]."]]

Bob wished that Chris was more interested in the world. He tried to teach Chris, but he thought (and rightly so) that Chris doesn't understand countries and continents beyond what he's seen on [[TV]], and only can associate with the places he's been in Virginia.<ref name="PSN 37" />

Bob's joke that [[Barack Obama]] would paint the White House black as soon as he became president influenced Chris to draw it in ''[[Sonichu 8]]''.

Chris has often complained about stressful confrontations with his father:

{{quote|well, my father is a major stressor against me; starts arguements[sic], annoys me, rarely washes his hands after restroom breaks (lord knows I've tried to encourage him to wash numerous time, and rarely succeeded.|Chris, [[IRC (31 December 2008)]]}}

After several occasions where trolls had communicated with Bob personally and found him to be quite pleasant and amicable, it's become obvious that he wasn't "starting arguments", as Chris asserts. More likely he was criticizing Chris's behavior and encouraging to better himself, which would involve work, which Chris fears and despises.

Bob had reportedly explained to him that he had taken care of his [[autistic]] ass for 29 years and so Chris should be more grateful. Chris couldn't give two shits, figuring that his father was ''obligated'' to take care of him, seeing no reason he should demonstrate any foreign concepts like "love", "support", "gratitude", and "willingness to help". Chris would run for his father's aid when he felt threatened, as in the later parts of the [[Kacey and Liquid Call]].

Despite Bob's occasional frustration over Chris's actions, he seemed to have bought into the theory that Chris is tormented by a [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|complex network of enemies spanning the entire world]], due to the [[Chris and his ego|success]] that he has earned from his very [[Chris and his ego|popular]] Sonichu franchise.<ref name="Church">[[Church audio]]</ref><ref name="Noble">[[Matthew Noble call]]</ref> In the [[Matthew Noble call]], it appears that Bob seemed to share Chris's tendency to bring up unrelated mishaps and debacles to make current incidents and sources of [[stress]] seem "petty" in comparison.

In line with that thread of distraction and self-delusion, Bob actually believed that Chris had accomplished significant goals in his adult life.<ref name="Prank">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZNHIbffirxU&feature=player_embedded</ref>

He would never get past that notion, given that he continued to have to nursemaid Chris well into his son's late 20s. In the later parts of 2009 and throughout 2010, as chronicled in Chris's e-mails with [[Vivian Gee E-mails, 2009|Vivian Gee]] and [[Jackie E-mails 7|Jackie]], Bob had been forced to take an increasingly active role in controlling Chris's spending and debt, paying off Chris's credit cards with his own money in an attempt to prevent interest charges from spiraling even further out of control. By the fall of 2010, he was monitoring Chris's bank accounts on a daily basis and keeping him on a strict allowance. Upon finding out about Chris's [[Tomgirl Pictures|escapades]] in early 2011, Bob's reaction was to question Chris's sexuality, at one point even calling him a fag.

Chris has said specifically that he doesn't have to love his father, but has to respect him.<ref>[[Mumble 1#Transcript|Mumble Chat 1]]</ref>

==Audio and video appearances==

In every appearance, Bob has proven himself to be better at charming Chris's [[sweetheart]]s than Chris himself.

* 26 February [[1994]]: Bob appears briefly behind Chris from 0:26 - 0:36 in the news report of Chris's [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes]].
* 14 [[February 2009]]: [[Bob Walks In]] to Chris [[mass debating]].
* 18 [[February 2009]]: In [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.5]] and [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.7|3.7]], Bob rambles to [[Julie]].
* 15 [[March 2009]]: Bob [[Church audio|talked]] to [[Robert Simmons V]] at [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|church]] while [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|Chris went to shit himself]].
* [[March 2009]]: Bob chaperoned Chris on his date with [[Emily]].
* 27 [[March 2009]]: Bob gets intruded by Chris in the [[Tour of Christian's House]], but is not visible.
* 27 [[August 2009]]: [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|Bob enters Chris's room]] and scolds him for making the [[Tour of Christian's House|house tour video]], (correctly) fearing that if someone saw the house as it was, they would be evicted (Uncut version only). This is a momentous occasion, showing some awareness on the part of the Chandlers that the filth and squalor they live in is a health hazard. This video subsequently off a wave of emails and calls to the Greene County Health Department, masterminded by trolls who hoped to realize Bob's fear of eviction, but the campaign was seemingly unsuccessful.
* [[November 2009]]: Bob and [[Barb|Snorlax]] make a brief appearance at the end of the [[Kacey and Liquid Call]].
* 15 [[August 2010]]: In his final outing on the damn internet, Bob gets a [[Matthew Noble call|call from the GAMe PLACe]] and is informed of Chris's actions earlier in the year. He then goes on a tangent about how Chris has been tormented by everyone ever since he was banned, and then demands Michael Snyder's information. Barbara also appears at the end of the call.

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:Thehell.jpg|"The hell is this crap?"
Image:0009-ChristopherChristmas2.jpg|Looking at the presents, it's sometime between 1982 and 2011.
Image:0011-ChristopherBobXmas.jpg|That isn't Chris's half-senile old grandfather at [[Christmas]] time. It's Bob. He was that age when Chris was about one.
Image:0014-YoungerFather.jpg
Image:0032-BobAtRestraunt.jpg|The epitome of handsome.
Image:0038-AuntCorinaAndDad.jpg|Bob with [[Aunt Corrina]].
Image:0062-NewChristian&Dad.jpg|Notice Chris's discomfort.
Image:0120-BobbyBehindBars.jpg|Bob wouldn't let a fence get in the way of cutting down Chris's Internet.
Image:0230-ChristianAndDadInClass.jpg|Bob: fashion icon.
Image:0626-BobbyInGarden.jpg|When Bob wasn't arguing with Chris or cutting down his Internet, he enjoyed gardening.
Image:CreepyBobAndChris.JPG|Bob will haunt your dreams tonight.
Image:Bob_80th.jpg|Calm down Bob, I think you're scaring Snorlax.
</gallery>
</center>

==Sources==
{{Fan Art|chris=Bob Chandler}}
<references />

{{People}}
{{Not_Jerks}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Chandler, Bob}}
[[Category:Family Members]]
[[Category:Dead]]

Semen

2011-12-07T01:05:49Z

Croatchu:

{{Articleofthenow}}
{{Honest}}
[[Image:CWCcomeuppancemedallion.JPG|thumb|right|250px|The closest [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Crystal]] will ever get to touching the [[Medallion|Medallion of Fail]].]]

'''Semen''' is the fluid secreted by the gonads of males to impregnate females. [[Christian Weston Chandler]] has many misconceptions about its purpose.

Despite being "[[honest]]" about [[sex]], Chris is sometimes uncomfortable saying "semen" and occasionally uses his own unique bowdlerized terms, such as "'''comeuppance'''" or "'''navy'''."

==Comeuppance==

In the context of sex (especially oral) with his [[TRUE and HONEST]] [[sweetheart]], Chris refers to DROPPIN' FUCKIN' LOADS as "comeuppance," as seen here:

{{quote|Uh, it just feels so good, unngghh, and because me being a [[virgin]], I would let you keep your mouth over my penis and then sooner than expected, I '''feel my comeuppance''' and I come into your mouth, my semen is inside your mouth and you'd swallow every drop.|Chris, "My First Time"<ref name="Chris_Sex_Logs#I_am_perverted">[[Chris_Sex_Logs#I_am_perverted]]</ref>}}

{{quote|Yeah, and I'm just gonna keep bangin' your BREASTS OVER AND OVER AGAIN until you get the first DOSAGE of my comeuppance!|Chris, [[Kacey Phone Call]]}}

Chris presumably coined the term because a) ejaculate is called "come," b) it goes "up" when it comes out of his bent [[duck]], and c) he's an idiot. However, this created a shitstorm when his sex tapes dropped, because [[Wikipedia:Webster's Dictionary|Webster's]] defines comeuppance as "a deserved rebuke or penalty."<ref>http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/comeuppance</ref> While Chris most likely heard this word and thought it would make a clever euphemism for "cum", the true meaning and its context seems to suggest an eerie [[Wikipedia:Freudian slip|Freudian slip]].

===A tasty treat===
[[File:GotMilk.jpg|thumb|200px|No caption is necessary.]]
Chris believes that whatever he eats changes the flavor of semen, which may have some basis in fact.<ref>http://ezinearticles.com/?Sperm-Taste---10-Simple-Tips-For-Better-Tasting-Semen&id=164106</ref> However, what makes this ridiculous is that Chris thinks his semen will taste ''exactly'' like whatever he eats. He has indicated that he would strive for flavored comeuppance so his sweetheart/cum dumpster would savor the taste. In the sex tape audio, Chris presented the following scenario to [[PandaHalo]]:

{{quote|I would have eaten so much [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|chocolate]], that day beforehand, and it would taste so yummy to you, probably like white chocolate. You'd swallow that.|Chris<ref name="Chris_Sex_Logs#I_am_perverted"/>}}

In subsequent chats with [[Julie]], this fantasy was revised so that his comeuppance would taste like [[Wikipedia:strawberry|strawberries]].<ref>[[Mumble 3]]</ref>

Coincidentally, sweets and other unhealthy foods are known to make semen taste even worse than usual. Chocolate is one of the worst offenders.

==Recycling==

{{quote|Mmm! Goes down salty.|Chris}}

Another tidbit revealed in the sex tapes was that when Chris [[mass debate|masturbates]] he makes sure to ejaculate into a [[Fapcup|plastic cup]], to avoid making a mess.<ref>[[Chris Sex Logs#Chris on Masturbation and the Sex Joke]]</ref> Shortly after this news broke, talk began to grow that Chris actually drinks from this cup.

The initial assumption, given Chris's hard stance on [[homos]], was that Chris was a devout, fundamentalist Christian and therefore had a rigid interpretation of the Biblical story of [[Wikipedia:Onan|Onan]]<ref>http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/2205/what-exactly-was-the-sin-of-onan</ref> (This was before we found out Chris wouldn't know anything about the Bible unless he heard it on ''[[Family Guy]]''). Eventually the real reason was discovered: Chris believes that by ingesting his own sperm he can "recycle" it, so that none of his potential children are lost, and so that his "semen count" (presumably he meant "sperm count") remains high, as though everyone is born with a finite number of sperm that they can eventually run out of if they don't swallow more.

For a time there was no concrete evidence to support this outrageous claim, so Chris wisely decided to confirm it as fact. Multiple times.

[21:08] [11:36:35 AM] Sarah Cassandra McKenzie says: have you ever tasted your own semen
[21:08] [11:37:42 AM] Christopher C.W.C. says: KEEP IT SECRET, but I actually have; I recycle my semen
until I get together with my Sweetheart (you) for the first time.
[21:08] [11:38:10 AM] Sarah Cassandra McKenzie says: ohhhh.. so that's why you do it in a cup
[21:08] [11:38:38 AM] Christopher C.W.C. says: yes; after recycle, I rinse the cup and dispose of it.
[21:10] [11:40:03 AM] Sarah Cassandra McKenzie says: where did you come up with the idea of swallowing
your own semen to recycle it after you cummed? Was it on a sex site or your own idea?
[21:10] [11:40:13 AM] Christopher C.W.C. says: MY OWN IDEA.
[21:12] [11:41:23 AM] Christopher C.W.C. says: IMHO, it's often unsatisfying to me upon swallowing,
because it's not being truly enjoyed by my Sweetheart.

FACT: If swallowing is "often unsatisfying" for Chris, that means that sometimes [[homo|it ''is'' satisfying]].

Not convinced? Try this:

{{quote|Uh, no, I don't think so, uh, because I've done that [drinking semen after masturbating], it's called "recycling it." Yeah, so it's basically recycling so, like uh, so he doesn't necessarily lose it. I mean, 'cause you know, if you think of it as a waste if you banged it out and then you, uh and then you flushed it down the commode or leave it in the condom in the garbage can...Though personally, I've been getting sick of swallowing my own, so lately I've been disposing of them.|Chris, [[Mumble 8|Mumble chat, 17 February 2009]]}}

[[Image:Recycle.jpg|thumb|right|Yes, he really does it...]]

In case you still don't believe it, Chris made a [[April 16 Fetish Vids|video]] for [[Ivy]] of himself drinking his jizz, which [[Clyde Cash]] leaked on 16 April 2009.<ref>http://www.slutload.com/watch/M20g7MWCNa5/Chris-chan-Fanta-and-Cum.html</ref> Chris had previously alleged that his semen would take on the flavor of any sort of fruits or sweets he recently consumed. So eating strawberries would lead to strawberry flavored semen and eating chocolate would lead to chocolate flavored semen. Ivy wanted him to test this theory. She requested he drink his semen and compare it to chocolate syrup. In the video, Chris explains that he doesn't have any chocolate milk [sic] handy. Instead, he mixed it with some orange Fanta, completely missing the point of her request was to compare the flavor.

Just to make sure everyone on Earth knows about it, Chris later made a [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009|video]] admitting and justifying the existence of the cum-guzzling footage.

{{quote|I recycle my own semen, because, uh, you know, yes I do masturbate--I'm not ashamed to admit it--as a lot of guys, I'm sure, have done the same thing in their time. Anyway, uh, basically I--yeah, into the cup and--yeah, I recycle it. So that that way I won't lose any, uh, unborn children. So then I can--then I can also still have a good number of...a good semen count. Keep maintain that by recycling it.|Chris, defending the rights of the unborn, 28 April 2009}}

Chris has some advice for all you men out there too:

{{quote|And depending on the taste of it, uh, to the original owners...of the--their respective semen, uh, it's a good idea to recycle, but if, uh, you don--if you don--if you feel uncomfortable, uh, doing it or it tastes bad to you, then, uh, then you don't have to do it.|Chris, giving everyone his permission to not swallow semen, 28 April 2009}}

Questions remain about his recycling plan. If he doesn't want to lose even a single unborn child, does that mean he plans to eventually father millions of children? Is he really dumb enough to believe his navy will survive digestion? (That's a rhetorical question.) And what happens to the comeuppance he wants to leave in his sweetheart's mouth — does that magically teleport back where it came from, or can women get pregnant from oral sex? Sadly, these questions will never be answered, as Chris will never actually deposit his semen anywhere except his own throat (or [[Kimmi]]'s plastic [[china]].)

In the Kacey calls, Chris has also suggested interest in drinking his semen for arousal:
{{quote|And then you know what, I'm going to lick it, I'm gonna lick it off your face, and then we're gonna share it in our tongue like tongue sharing MOMENT!|Chris, [[Kacey Phone Call]], after describing how he would titfuck Kacey}}
{{Clear}}

In [[Mailbag 30]], Chris announced that he had [[Mailbag_30#Chris quit guzzling cum|kicked the habit]], although the validity of this statement is questionable at best, considering his [[List of Chris's lies|track record]] for telling the truth.

When [[Bob]] described a youthful adventure (c. [[Pre-1980#1940s|1948]]) from his youth to [[Emily]], Chris blurted out ''" I'd been hanging around in hi- inside him while he was taking that trip!"''<ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript]]</ref>, which implies that he believes the sperm cell that became him in mid-1981 had existed for over thirty years, and had presumably been ejaculated and recycled by his father many, many times.

== Sources ==
<references/>

==See also==
*[[Mass debating]]
*[[April 16 Fetish Vids]]

[[Category:Physical characteristics]][[Category:Things Chris likes]]

Inventions

2011-12-06T23:08:20Z

Croatchu:

[[Image:Tesla.jpg|thumb|[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nikola_Tesla Nikola Tesla], another famous inventor who had a mental disorder and died a virgin. The similarities end at this point.]]

{{quote|"Necessity is the mother of invention", and I have invented quite a few crafts that have served me well.|Chris's reply to "Leonardo da Vinci", CWCipedia [[Mailbag]].}}

[[Christian Weston Chandler]] is truly a Renaissance man, with many '''inventions''' to his credit. He draws [[Sonichu|comics]], makes [[Youtube|videos]], performs [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys|songs]], models [[Honor Roll|sculptures out of clay]], provides voices for the [[Official Videobooks]], etc. etc. But, being the [[David Alan Chandler|second]] son of the outstanding inventor [[Bob Chandler]], the man who designed controls for plastic water container molding machines (without which Chris would have no [[Fapcup|cup]] from which to [[Recycling|drink]] his [[Semen|navy]]), our hero just couldn't suppress his natural talent to invention. And thus, Christian Weston Chandler added being an inventor extraordinaire to his long list of "accomPLISHments."

==Better than Leonardo da Vinci==
In [[November 2009]], Chris received an e-mail from a [[Troll|fan]] roleplaying as Leonardo da Vinci, one of the great artists with whom Chris has compared himself [[Hotel Ricky Ricardo|in the past]] (managing to forget the great Italian's name and misspell his surname). Leo ironically stated that he considers Chris his [[Chris and art|"artistic equal"]], and asked if the [[autistic]] [[Chris and English|geinus]] has a similar knack to making inventions, for which Leonardo himself was famous. Being the egotistical and vain person he is, and not wanting even Leonardo da Vinci to excel him in any field, Chris was quick to assure Mr.da Vinci in his [[Mailbag]] reply that he is, indeed, an inventor as well, and proceeded to list three of the most outstanding of his inventions.

===The Three Great Inventions of Christian Weston Chandler===
'''I.''' The "One set of Inventions" including:
*[[Sonichu]];
*[[Rosechu]];
*City of [[CWCville]]. (Not really inventions so much as they are fictional concepts, and [[Chris and Copyright|incredibly derivative ones]], at that.) Of course, given [[Chris and reality|Chris's tenuous grasp on reality]], he may not realize this.

'''II.''' A "heavy-duty case", "built from [[Lego]]s and held together with tape", whose main purpose is "to hold [his] 20+ [[Card_games#Pok.C3.A9mon_TCG|Pok'emon]] (sic) Trading Card Game Decks with an area designed for damage counters, die and such". This is something that may have been a significant accomplishment for say, a 9-year-old, but when a 28-year-old man lists something he built with Lego as an "invention," it can only evoke facepalming. Moreover, Chris did not invent Legos, merely put them together.

'''III.''' The [[Dating Education|Dating Education Class]]. (Which don't exist, so he didn't really invent them. And even then, a terrible idea.)

==Other Inventions==
{{incomplete}}

==See also==
*[[Bob Chandler]]
*[[Chris and Copyright]]

[[Category:Hobbies]][[Category: Media produced by Chris-chan]]

Jack Thaddeus

2011-12-06T02:03:57Z

Croatchu:

{{Quote|Jack Thaddeus! Give me back my [[PlayStation Network]]s accounts, you expert hacker! You, you [[Chris and English|ir—rational expert]]! Motherfucking [[Chris and religion|burning-in-Hell]] hacker!|Chris on Jack<ref>[[Chris humps his PS3]]</ref>}}
{| class="infobox" style="width: 21em; font-size: 90%;"
|-
! colspan="2" | Trolls
|-
| colspan="2" | [[File:Ahuvia.png|200px|center]]
|-
! colspan="2" |Ahuviya Rotem Harel
|-
|'''Birth name'''
|Phillip V. Haskins-Delici
|-
| '''Alias'''
| Jack Thaddeus JThadius, JThadeus ADF Felipe Delicias
|-
| '''Date of Birth'''
| 12 August [[1985]]
|-
| '''Residence'''
| Philadelphia, PA, [[USA]]
|-
| '''Gender'''
| Transwoman
|-
| '''Nationality'''
| American
|-
| '''Race'''
| [[Chris and race|White]]
|-
|}
'''Jack Thaddeus''' (born 12 August 1985) is the [[troll]] responsible for various [[PS3#PlayStation Network|PSN]]-related trollings with [[Chris]]. He is also a TRUE and HONEST [[homo]].<ref>[[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 3]]</ref> In [[August 2011]], he was outed as being none other than [[Internet]] lolcow '''Ahuviya Rotem Harel''' ("ADF"), a noted [[cosplay]]er, [[Michael Snyder|JEW]], communist, and [[Asperger's syndrome|"Aspergian"]].

==PSN hax==
Jack had a sweeping victory in the seizure of multiple Chris PSN accounts, using them to blackmail Chris into [[Chris humps his PS3|dry-humping his PS3]] and [[It's UGH!|singing "It's okay to be gay"]]. Unimpressed by Chris's performance, he deleted them for the good of mankind.

Jack worked with his daughter [[Samantha Thaddeus]] in order to break into Chandler's PSN accounts and possibly bring about the beginning of the [[Liquid Chris]] Saga.<ref>[[Jack Thaddeus E-mails#7/19/09|The Mysterious Man at Otakon]]</ref>

==CWCipedia advertisements==
[[Image:Gay&PickleAds.JPG|thumb|Jack's ads]]

In [[November 2009]], Jack purchased advertising space on the [[CWCipedia]]. One banner ad linked to a [[gay]] rights website (noting that the creator and hero of ''[[Family Guy]]'' both support gay rights, and using the hated word "[[naïve]]"), while another advertised Mexican vacations using an anthropomorphic [[pickle|cactus]] mascot.

Chris was incensed by the desecration of his wiki and [[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence|demanded that the ads be removed]]. Upon being told that Thaddeus was responsible, Chris declared "[[Kill De Jack|I'll deal with him myself]]." Whatever measures he took, though, they didn't do much good, because the original ads were soon joined by many new banners featuring pickles, [[homos]], and other things Chris hates and fears. These ads would have stayed for a long time since Jack, a gentle and generous soul, [[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence#Do NOT tamper with the advertisements (CCS)|rented all the ads-space up to the end of 2010]].

Jack eventually leased some of the adspace to [[Mao]], the webmaster of the [[Asperpedia]]. On 25 [[February 2010]], this lease apparently concluded, and Jack filled the website with dicks.

Eventually, on 18 [[March 2010]], Jack pulled all his funding from the site, forcing the Sysop to take the site down. It came back the next day under the rule of Mao.

==In the comics==
[[Image:jacktochris.jpg|thumb|This is what Chris actually believes.]]
Jack made his first full appearance in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]] as the 4-cent_garbage building is collapsing. When [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] escapes, he condemns him and [[Clyde Cash]] for being homo trolls. When [[Beel]] escapes, he, too, condemns the two for their actions, saying that being homo trolls that are "slandering and tarnishing a innocent man's good name" is [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Godwin%27s_law just as evil as being an assistant for Adolf Hitler]. With no option left, Clyde and Jack jump into the 66+6 story elevator shaft to their suicide.

==Called out==
[[image:separatedatbirth.jpg|thumb|Separated at birth?]]

On 16 [[August 2011]] [[Calling_out#Calling_Out_Jack_Thaddius_-_Ahuviya|Chris claimed]] to have dox on Jack, and claimed that his real name was Ahuviya, that he lived in Pennsylvania, and that Jack is planning to have [[Wikipedia:Sex reassignment surgery (male-to-female)|gender reassignment surgery]]. He demanded a video of apology to be uploaded by Jack/Ahuviya by 10 [[September 2011]].

A week later, [[Calling_Out#Re-Calling Ahuvia|he revealed]] that Ahuviya was a [[Molvania|communist]] and into BDSM.

In a shocking twist, it emerged that Jack/Ahuviya was none other than Ahuviya Rotem Harel, a.k.a. ADF, a lolcow almost as big as Chris himself.<ref>[http://adfki.wikinet.org/wiki/Why_Philadelphia_is_so_much_Greater_than_CWCville]</ref><ref>[http://adfki.wikinet.org/wiki/Advice_for_Chris-chan_from_Ahuviya_Harel]</ref>

==See also==
*[[Jack Thaddeus E-mails]]
*[[Jack Thaddeus E-mails Part 2]]
*[[Jack Thaddeus E-mails Part 3]]
*[[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call]]
*[[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 2]]
*[[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call 3]]

==Sources==
<references />
==External links==
*[http://adfki.wikinet.org/wiki/Main_Page ADFki]
{{Trolls}}
{{DEFAULTSORT:Thaddeus, Jack}}

[[Category:Trolls]][[Category: CWCipedia Saga]]

User:Croatchu

2011-12-05T20:36:22Z

Croatchu:

==Me==

{{collapsible|Userboxes|
<center>{{Canuckfag}} {{Croatian}} {{JERK}} {{Armchair Psychologist}} {{GrammarNazi}} {{Observer}} {{Catholic}} {{TheSimpsons}} {{Wii}}
{{Lucy}}
}}

'''Name''': Croatchu

'''Age''': Eons

'''Occupation(s)''': JERK, Armchair psychologist, amateur Christorian, grammar Nazi and all-around extraordinary gentleman

'''Achievement(s)''': First openly Croatian CWCki user

{{#ev:youtube|UrgpZ0fUixs}}

User:Croatchu

2011-12-05T20:33:40Z

Croatchu:

==Me==

{{collapsible|Userboxes|
<center>{{Canuckfag}} {{Croatian}} {{JERK}} {{Armchair Psychologist}} {{GrammarNazi}} {{Observer}} {{Catholic}} {{TheSimpsons}} {{Wii}}
{{Lucy}}
}}

Name: Croatchu
Age: Eons
Occupation(s): JERK, Armchair psychologist, amateur Christorian, grammar Nazi and all-around extraordinary gentleman
Achievement(s): First openly Croatian CWCki user

{{#ev:youtube|UrgpZ0fUixs}}

Saga

2011-12-05T01:17:33Z

Croatchu:

{{Dated}}
[[Image:Timeline.png|thumb|right]]
{{Quote|I've had online relationships in my past; most of which were good, but all of them ended not so good for me.|Chris makes the understatement of the century<ref>[[Sydney Kirsch]]</ref>}}
A '''saga''' (from the Old Norse ''sögur'') is an overall story arc of events.

In the world of [[Christian Weston Chandler]], the term is used to describe an on-going trolling effort or other similar series of events that produces considerable drama over a period of time. Sometimes taking place over the course of months, other times taking place over the course of a few weeks. Since he was discovered online and found to have many hot buttons that made him susceptible to entrapment, Chris has been perpetually embroiled in some saga or other. More often than not, he is trapped in more than one saga at a time or found to be quickly jumping from the end of one to the beginning of the next. The term first came into widespread use with the [[Miyamoto Saga]] and has since been used to describe the overall events in a time period (similar to the term "dynasty").

The exact origin of the term "saga" being used to refer to these events in Chris' life is, as of yet, unknown. However, some argue that the usage may have originated with [[Vivian Gee]]'s [[Audiobook|audiobook]] project.

==List of Sagas==

===Megan Saga (''Summer 2005 - 18 March 2008'')===
[[Image:Megansagaheader.jpg]]

{{main|Megan Schroeder}}

The first and longest saga in the story of Christian Weston Chandler. From 2005 to 18 March 2008, this told the story of Chris and his longest and closest relationship with a girl, Megan Schroeder, leading into Chris's first encounter with [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] and Megan discovering the depths of Chris's madness. It began with a chance meeting at a ''[[Pokémon]] TCG'' League meeting at [[The GAMe PLACe]], which progressed into inappropriate touching and ended with shocking [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|hand-drawn pornography]] that was an embarrassment for all parties involved...excluding Chris.

===Adam Stackhouse Saga (''June 2007 - 4 August 2007'')===
[[Image:Adamsaga.jpg]]

: ''See also: [[Adam Stackhouse]], [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown]]''

In June 2007, Chris entered and attempted to win a contest in order to win Megan's heart, only to be <s>cockblocked</s> beaten by a much superior entry made by Adam Stackhouse. The saga resulted in [[CWC is Angry|madman]]-style threats and [[PaRappa_contest#Aftermath|several angry e-mails and posts to contest organizers]]. Chris would rage for quite some time before deciding enough was enough. This was also the last time a saga was inadvertently caused by an unsuspecting member of the public. From this time on, [[trolls]] would control the content.

===ED Saga (''November 2007 - present'')===
[[Image:Edsaga.jpg]]

: ''See also: [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]''

In November 2007, [[trolls]] would discover Chris and put up the "Chris-chan" page on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]. Chris would initially think that they just got information wrong, but as time would go on, Chris would reveal the true depths of his insanity, destroying his friendship with Megan Schroeder and becoming the epic lolcow we know him to be. Were it not for this article showing how susceptible he was to trolling and how [[Autism|divinely retarded]] he could be, Chris may have just been another dumbass with no life, and probably would have been more or less forgotten by now. To this day, ED remains a thorn in his side which he must constantly address to those new to his life. Further to this, he still maintains they are out to do him harm.

===Blanca Saga (''August 2008 - 21 October 2008'')===
[[Image:Blancasaga.jpg]]

{{main|Blanca Weiss}}

Around August 2008, Chris would meet Blanca Weiss, making her his first Internet sweetheart. Aside from being the first sweetheart, she also proved how [[Captain's Log, Stardate September 13th, 2008|tenacious and strange]] Chris could be about relationships, revealing several [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 9th, 2008|quirks and oddities that he felt were somehow appropriate to mention]] to someone he believed loved him. It also showed how useless any [[White knight|white knighting]] efforts could be. In the span of two months, Blanca (actually three trolls working in tandem) would release the infamous pictures of Chris naked, then obtain and destroy Chris's [[Medallion of Fail|medallions]].

===Jimmy Hill Saga (''mid/late 2008'')===
[[Image:Jimmyhillsaga.jpg]]

{{main|Jimmy Hill}}

At the same time Chris was dealing with Blanca, he was hit with another troll attack as he believed that a man known as Jimmy Hill was using the Sonichu name and character to make money off of him in Europe. The thought of someone making money from his true and original creation led him to [[Captain's Log, Stardate Columbus Day, 2008|stress out and provide proof]] of the [[Copyright|infringement]]. Those attacks would end around the same time the Blanca Saga ended.

===Clyde Cash Saga ''(December 2008 - present)''===
[[Image:Clydesaga.jpg]]

{{main|Clyde Cash}}

In an attempt to get back at Chris for his [[Ryan Cash|brother's suicide]], Clyde Cash would go on a months-long trolling spree, going to great lengths to get back at the autistic wonder. The saga would result in the revelation of a [[The Miscreants|top secret organization]] hellbent on preventing the manchild from losing his virginity. It only ended with the apparent death of its creator.

However, in [[September 2009]] Chris resumed his war against Clyde Cash after discovering that he and another supposed troll, [[Gregg Mays]], were one and the same person. In the process, he's made numerous videos attempting to blackmail the man, going so far as to mock a [[Twin Falling Towers|national tragedy]].

And so it continues to this date; a never-ending conflict between two mortal enemies...

===PandaHalo Saga (''mid/late 2008 - February 2009'')===
[[Image:Pandasaga.jpg]]

{{main|PandaHalo}}

When Chris realized Blanca was a troll, he would move on to PandaHalo as his new sweetheart. The saga came to a quick and abrupt end when she was found to be bearing the child of Clyde Cash, conceived through rape. Unsurprisingly, Chris would quickly abandon Panda and she would (presumably) die in the Australian brushfires, despite living miles away from the incident. She would end up giving trolls the [[Scrapbook of Fail]] and [[Slideshow]].

===Miyamoto Saga (''January 2009 - 10 February 2009'')===
[[Image:Miyamotosaga.jpg]]

{{main|Miyamoto Saga}}

In the beginning of January 2009, Chris would be confronted by <s>[[Clyde Cash|a troll]]</s> [[Shigeru Miyamoto]], who would attempt to try to make his ''Sonichu'' game fantasy a reality. Chris's ineptitude and inability to do...well...anything other than be a lazy fuck resulted in horrible delays and stalls to the project's advancement. In the end, [[Reggie Fils-Aimé]] shut down the entire project with a scathing letter. This trolling encounter would have Chris give trolls a PowerPoint project that talked in great length about [[Chris and his ego|himself]]...and very little about his game.

===Julie Saga (''February 2009 - March 2009'')===
[[Image:Juliesaga.jpg]]

{{main|Julie}}

In February 2009 to early March 2009, Chris's latest sweetheart would be Julie, who was in actuality a young troll named [[BlueSpike]]. In this brief timeframe, BlueSpike would release the infamous [[sex tape]], force Chris to declare [[BILLY MAYS]] mayor of [[CWCville]] and destroy his second medallion by forcing him to stick it up his ass. However, BlueSpike's total and utter control over Chris would lead to a schism between trolls, leading to the creation of the [[PVCC (message board)|PVCC]] and this very wiki.

===Ivy Saga (''March 2009 - July 2009'')===
[[Image:Ivysaga.jpg]]

{{main|Ivy}}

In March 2009, Chris would meet and fall in love with Ivy, his then-latest sweetheart. His crush towards Ivy would lead Chris to create three special comics and two music videos, a practical [[semen|spurt]] of work that wouldn't be surpassed for awhile. The saga also revealed Chris at his [[I am devoted to My Sweetest Ivy|creepiest]] [[CWC's Message for Ivy|yet]], scarring many trolls and CWC-watchers. The saga also resulted in a [[CWC's ¨It's All Coming Back To Me¨|proposal of marriage]]. Despite the work spurt, the saga would come to an abrupt end thanks to a combination of troll interference from [[Joshua Martinez]] and interference from [[Bob Chandler]] and [[Rocky Shoemaker]], leading to Ivy's suicide.

===Liquid Chris Saga (''June 21, 2009 - 27 July 2011'')===
[[Image:Liquidsaga.jpg]]

{{main|Liquid Chris}}

In July 2009, the TRUE and HONEST Christan Weston Chandler would come forth after the other Chris would reveal himself as a troll in one video. The other Chris, [[Ian Brandon Anderson]], would challenge Chris to a sing-off, with the TRUE and HONEST CWC proving himself the victor in the end. The appearance of this other Chris would pressure the other into churning out more comics than he had before, currently heading for the completion of [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], something that many believed would never happen due to the interference of many trolls.

Later, Liquid would return to continue on his quest to get rid of this faker. In the process of this new entry to the saga, Ian and Chris would battle over the heart of Chris's true love, [[Kacey]]. In the end, the real Chris would win out and marry Kacey, leaving Ian to be butthurt. Liquid's YouTube account would eventually close on 27 July, 2011.

===CWCipedia Saga (''4 May 2009 – 26 June 2010'')===
[[Image:The CWCipedia Saga.jpg]]

{{main|CWCipedia}}

In early June 2009, Chris was given the CWCipedia, a wiki-styled web page, so that Chris can use it to upload his ''Sonichu'' comics, blog, and personal life safe from the trolls who instantly dive at his other web pages and hack them. It doubled as a source for the [[CWCki]] to draw many of Chris's latest failures from, making it his best friend and his worst enemy.

On 19 [[November 2009]], perhaps one of the greatest features the wiki introduced was the [[Mailbag]], in which a dump of all [[Fans|fan]] e-mails sent to the admin's address could be answered by Chris, for all to see. This feature provided insight into how Chris responds to trolls through e-mail about his views on, for example, homosexuality, GodJesus, autism, etc.

Since 23 November 2009, advertisements linking to porn sites, gay rights organizations, information on Asperger's syndrome, and the [[Asperchu|Asperpedia]] took residence on the CWCipedia, paid for by trolls. Eventually, Alec, the creator of Asperchu, paid Jack Thaddeus to replace most, if not all, of the ads with ads for Asperpedia. Chris had [[Address to my Cwcipedia SysOp|complained]] [[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence|repeatedly]] to the SysOp of the Wiki about these ads, which would have paid for the site until the end of 2010, pending negotiations.<ref>http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=User_talk:ChrisChanSonichu</ref> All of this had "stressed" Chris out to the point of uploading videos of himself screaming [[death threats]] upon the advertisers' heads, and creating a separate, stress-free, ad-free front page.

This saga would lead to the site being shut down twice in a row, both due to copyright infringement, and would lead to the death of [[Simonla Rosechu]] in the most humiliating way - death by exploding toilet.

The Asperpedia team would continue to vandalize and hijack CWCipedia in a variety of ways until it finally collapsed in May, and Chris finally abandoned the site after already making numerous claims that he'd quit the Internet forever. After Mao moved in to fill the void, he passed ownership to [[Alec]] and [[Vivian Gee]], wherein they took over the site and the rights to Sonichu to begin ''Sonichu'' Season 2, where ultimately, on 26 [[June 2010]], the entire site would be terminated along with the entirety of the original 110mb server.

===Asperchu Saga (''November 2009 - 30 August 2011'')===
[[Image:The Asperchu Saga.jpg]]

{{main|Asperchu}}

In late November 2009, an artist named Alec Benson Leary started a new series called ''Asperchu'', starring the titular Electric Asperger's Hedgehog Pokemon. Chris had spent most of December ignoring ''Asperchu'' and its popularity before finally exploding with rage, claiming the series as nothing more than fan fiction and a parody. The popularity of ''Asperchu'', combined with Chris's continuing downward spiral that is [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], has led many of Chris's fans to abandon ''Sonichu'' and go to ''Asperchu''.

Most of the saga has been spent with Chris raging at not just Alec, but also [[Evan]], Sean, and Asperpedia admin Mao over their usage of their characters and how they mock him. As well, Chris has been dealing with Evan over the usage of Simonla Rosechu, with Chris going so far as to deny reality and substitute it with his own.

In terms of productivity, it has given us ''Sonichu'' #10, which showcases Chris going all out in trying to get rid of everything he hates, including homosexuality and trolls. In that same book, Chris kills all four trolls involved in this saga as retaliation for making him kill Simonla Rosechu. Also, [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Calls|nine phone calls]] have been leaked. These phone calls show Alec attempting to get through to Chris and his way of thinking and Chris fighting tooth and nail not to change at all.

In the aftermath of the saga, Evan ceased his ''Simonchu'' comic, proud to have Simonla removed, Alec and Sean continued their respective comics, and Mao continues to poke and jab at Chris. And while the saga had for the most part died down, Asperpedia continued to harass its rival CWCipedia, either by placing new ads, vandalizing it, or shutting it down altogether. One of the post-trial ads even precipitated Chris's falling out with [[Jackie e-mails|Jackie]].

Alec Benson Leary would later be [[Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher|called out]] by Chris in 2011, and is identity was "revealed" as Christopher Paul Whitney, followed by Chris [[Chris and Health]]|sloppily devouring a cheap microwavable pizza]].

===Surfshack Tito Saga (''2 March 2010 - 10 August 2011'')===
[[Image:The Surfshack Tito Saga.jpg]]

{{Main|Surfshack Tito}}

Sometime in January 2010, Chris met and fell in love with a certain girl in real life, hoping she would be the one who'd end his streak of being a [[virgin with rage]]. On 9 March 2010, Chris would release a ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]'' video of a stage based off a book he was helping write with his gal-pal...and release a name in the process. Dedicated trolls used the information to discover the gal-pal's identity, but decided to let the [[lulz]] spread naturally. The next day, however, a troll revealed the information to the gal-pal, codenamed [[The Wallflower]], and while one set of lulz was stopped, another one was set into motion.

The troll, calling himself Surfshack Tito, claimed responsibility for not only hacking his PSN accounts for the umpteenth time, but also stealing The Wallflower from Chris. Chris, in response, has threatened to go all out and seemingly try to murder Tito, threatening him with a [[pocket knife]], attacking him with [[Chris Drops the N-Bomb|racial slurs]], and flashing his [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|underwear]] in the process. At the same time, Chris has discovered and declared war on the CWCki, demanding that all pages involving himself, his friends and family be altered to suit his needs. In short order, Chris's attack on the CWCki fell utterly short.

The creativity here has been utterly stunted, especially after The Wallflower left him. He has gone on to blame his fans for wanting him to make more comics and compared them to the trolls that have tormented him. He has also vowed to leave the Internet forever, though he ended up reshowing his face 36 hours after his vow...

Echoes of this saga would be eventually heard in [[August 2011]] when, after announcing his glorious comeback to the Internet, Chris claimed to have discovered the true identity of Tito and tried to blackmail him using this information. Tito eventually gave into his demands on 9 August, which Chris [[Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy|later acknowledged and accepted]].

=== The GAMe PLACe Saga (''pre-2005 - present'')===
{{main|The GAMe PLACe|Michael Snyder}}

For a long time, Chris had been visiting The GAMe PLACe on a regular basis. It was here that Chris would meet Megan herself, as well as [[Lucas]] and [[Mimms]], two people who would deliver a number of intel over Chris during his time there. He also participated in the ''[[Pokemon TCG]]'' League, using his own poorly made decks. However, Chris was a pain to the store's manager, [[Michael Snyder]] and by August 2008, tired of Chris terrorizing various [[niggos|patrons]], yelling at children, bogarting the TV and being an all-round pain. Michael would finally ban Chris from the store, embarrassing him and his mother in the process. It wouldn't be the end, however.

On multiple occasions, Chris returned to the store despite Michael's insistence that he never come back. He tried emails, sneaking in, [[Apology to Game & Hobby Place|pleading]] on [[YouTube]], but nothing worked. The first time he attempted (unsuccessfully, of course) to lift his ban in person was with a prepared, [[Chris and remorse|faux-apologetic speech]]. When that failed, he stormed out angrily and called Michael a [[Chris and race|JEW]], then attempted to rally his "fanbase" and get them [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|to troll him]]. [[6 June 2010|The next occasion]] was much more disturbing. He claimed he was trying to take a picture of Michael for a dartboard, but was caught in the act and was chased in the parking lot. Nearly running over Michael and his daughter, eventually the [[Jerkops]] got involved, but they did not arrest him. Michael accused him of trying to take [[pedofork|pictures of his daughter]]. Whether it's true or not, it's [[Kacey|confirmed]] that Chris has stalker tendencies.

The saga was revived in October 2011, when Chris and [[Barb|his mother]] visited the GAMe PLACe, and [[28 October 2011|an incident occurred]]. Exact details of events remain unknown, but charges such as assaulting a law enforcement official and property damage of more than $1000 were brought against the two. Chris and Barb have since had their preliminary hearings, and Michael Snyder has brought civil charges against both of them. The outcome of these events remains to be seen.

==Intermittent Sagas==

===The CWC Exile Saga (''20 March 2010 - 29 August 2010'')===

{{main|Rocky Shoemaker|Fridays After Five|Flipnote Hatena}}

After Chris lost The Wallflower and fought with Surfshack Tito, an outside force attempted to push Chris away from the Internet. No less than five times, Chris has boldly claimed that he has abandoned the Internet and smugly told his detractors that they should go outside and live their lives, advice Chris should have followed ''years'' ago. However, Chris still latched onto the Internet as much as he could, trying to find ways to sneak in without the force discovering him.

Trolls would end up discovering Chris dancing like a dying turkey at [[Fridays After Five]], then discover that he had set up shop at the [[Flipnote Hatena]], where he tried to spread his sick and twisted thoughts to younger, innocent people before being shut down. However, the thing that would finally bring Chris back to the Internet and end his exile would be [[The MovingForward videos|the destruction of his beloved Life Upgrade]]. At his own hands, no less!

==Post-exile==

===Jackie Saga (''April 5, 2010 - November 26, 2010'')===
[[Image:JackieSaga.jpg]]

{{main|Jackie}}

Following the fallout of The Wallflower incident, Chris pulled himself away from the Internet, only for him to meet and begin conversing to a woman named Jackie. Meeting her at [[The Hook Cafe|''The HooK'' Café]], the two began conversing through [[Jackie Emails|e-mails]], revealing the rationale in Chris's attempts to get back into The GAMe PLACe and showing [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|he's still incredibly disturbing]]. However, Chris broke off his relationship with her after she attempted to get him to change his life for the better.

Around [[September 2010]], Jackie and Chris were confirmed to have attempted to try again with a relationship, with Chris creating [[100_2265|even]] [[ECV 00002|more]] [[Pregnant Act|disturbing]] [[Don'tPintheOop|videos]] in the process. A third party - [[Lars]] McNulty, Jackie's ex-boyfriend - stepped in by the end of September, prompting Chris to release several videos attacking his newfound enemy. Video updates became increasingly bizarre, but still occurred regularly until the end of [[October 2010|October]].

By [[November 2010|November]], the leaked correspondence showed that Jackie was getting increasing impatient as Chris kept failing to fulfill her requests, while Chris made up a lot of lame excuses for why he could not deliver on them, all while continuously begging Jackie to have sex with him. On November 26, Jackie would send Chris the latest in a string of e-mails in which she criticized him for his laziness and unwillingness when it came to pay a more active part in relationships, and how he, despite of this, kept begging her for sex. Chris stopped responding at this point, putting an end to the saga.

===Tomgirl Saga (''28 April 2011 - present'')===
[[Image:Cwctl.jpg]]

{{main|Tomgirl Pictures}}

In mid-2011, Chris's exile from the Internet continued, and his mental state deteriorated. Some leaked evidence of [[Wikipedia:Transvestitism|transvestitism]] surfaced in [[April 2011|April]], and later joined the [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia]] forum, where his posts showed that Chris and sanity were only vague acquaintances. However, when Chris found out he was discovered on the forums, he decided to fight back by [[Calling Out]] various [[trolls]], demanding that they apologize and leave the Internet or they would have their information revealed and be trolled in return. He managed to drive away some trolls, including Surfshack Tito, before the saga was utterly derailed by the death of his father, [[Bob]].

==The Future==
If anything remains clear, it is that Chris is incapable of applying past events to current ones. Given this, it is likely that Chris will be enduring one saga or another until the day he dies.

==See also==
*''[[Excel Saga]]''

==References==
<references/>

[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category: Sagas]]

Saga

2011-12-05T01:13:56Z

Croatchu: I thought adding the dates of the sagas (from beginning to end) would be a good idea. Apologies of it messed up on any of them

{{Dated}}
[[Image:Timeline.png|thumb|right]]
{{Quote|I've had online relationships in my past; most of which were good, but all of them ended not so good for me.|Chris makes the understatement of the century<ref>[[Sydney Kirsch]]</ref>}}
A '''saga''' (from the Old Norse ''sögur'') is an overall story arc of events.

In the world of [[Christian Weston Chandler]], the term is used to describe an on-going trolling effort or other similar series of events that produces considerable drama over a period of time. Sometimes taking place over the course of months, other times taking place over the course of a few weeks. Since he was discovered online and found to have many hot buttons that made him susceptible to entrapment, Chris has been perpetually embroiled in some saga or other. More often than not, he is trapped in more than one saga at a time or found to be quickly jumping from the end of one to the beginning of the next. The term first came into widespread use with the [[Miyamoto Saga]] and has since been used to describe the overall events in a time period (similar to the term "dynasty").

The exact origin of the term "saga" being used to refer to these events in Chris' life is, as of yet, unknown. However, some argue that the usage may have originated with [[Vivian Gee]]'s [[Audiobook|audiobook]] project.

==List of Sagas==

===Megan Saga (''Summer 2005 - 18 March 2008'')===
[[Image:Megansagaheader.jpg]]

{{main|Megan Schroeder}}

The first and longest saga in the story of Christian Weston Chandler. From 2005 to 18 March 2008, this told the story of Chris and his longest and closest relationship with a girl, Megan Schroeder, leading into Chris's first encounter with [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] and Megan discovering the depths of Chris's madness. It began with a chance meeting at a ''[[Pokémon]] TCG'' League meeting at [[The GAMe PLACe]], which progressed into inappropriate touching and ended with shocking [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|hand-drawn pornography]] that was an embarrassment for all parties involved...excluding Chris.

===Adam Stackhouse Saga (''June 2007 - 4 August 2007'')===
[[Image:Adamsaga.jpg]]

: ''See also: [[Adam Stackhouse]], [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown]]''

In June 2007, Chris entered and attempted to win a contest in order to win Megan's heart, only to be <s>cockblocked</s> beaten by a much superior entry made by Adam Stackhouse. The saga resulted in [[CWC is Angry|madman]]-style threats and [[PaRappa_contest#Aftermath|several angry e-mails and posts to contest organizers]]. Chris would rage for quite some time before deciding enough was enough. This was also the last time a saga was inadvertently caused by an unsuspecting member of the public. From this time on, [[trolls]] would control the content.

===ED Saga (''November 2007 - present'')===
[[Image:Edsaga.jpg]]

: ''See also: [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]''

In November 2007, [[trolls]] would discover Chris and put up the "Chris-chan" page on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]. Chris would initially think that they just got information wrong, but as time would go on, Chris would reveal the true depths of his insanity, destroying his friendship with Megan Schroeder and becoming the epic lolcow we know him to be. Were it not for this article showing how susceptible he was to trolling and how [[Autism|divinely retarded]] he could be, Chris may have just been another dumbass with no life, and probably would have been more or less forgotten by now. To this day, ED remains a thorn in his side which he must constantly address to those new to his life. Further to this, he still maintains they are out to do him harm.

===Blanca Saga (''August 2008 - 21 October 2008'')===
[[Image:Blancasaga.jpg]]

{{main|Blanca Weiss}}

Around August 2008, Chris would meet Blanca Weiss, making her his first Internet sweetheart. Aside from being the first sweetheart, she also proved how [[Captain's Log, Stardate September 13th, 2008|tenacious and strange]] Chris could be about relationships, revealing several [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 9th, 2008|quirks and oddities that he felt were somehow appropriate to mention]] to someone he believed loved him. It also showed how useless any [[White knight|white knighting]] efforts could be. In the span of two months, Blanca (actually three trolls working in tandem) would release the infamous pictures of Chris naked, then obtain and destroy Chris's [[Medallion of Fail|medallions]].

===Jimmy Hill Saga (''mid/late 2008'')===
[[Image:Jimmyhillsaga.jpg]]

{{main|Jimmy Hill}}

At the same time Chris was dealing with Blanca, he was hit with another troll attack as he believed that a man known as Jimmy Hill was using the Sonichu name and character to make money off of him in Europe. The thought of someone making money from his true and original creation led him to [[Captain's Log, Stardate Columbus Day, 2008|stress out and provide proof]] of the [[Copyright|infringement]]. Those attacks would end around the same time the Blanca Saga ended.

===Clyde Cash Saga ''(December 2008 - present)''===
[[Image:Clydesaga.jpg]]

{{main|Clyde Cash}}

In an attempt to get back at Chris for his [[Ryan Cash|brother's suicide]], Clyde Cash would go on a months-long trolling spree, going to great lengths to get back at the autistic wonder. The saga would result in the revelation of a [[The Miscreants|top secret organization]] hellbent on preventing the manchild from losing his virginity. It only ended with the apparent death of its creator.

However, in [[September 2009]] Chris resumed his war against Clyde Cash after discovering that he and another supposed troll, [[Gregg Mays]], were one and the same person. In the process, he's made numerous videos attempting to blackmail the man, going so far as to mock a [[Twin Falling Towers|national tragedy]].

And so it continues to this date; a never-ending conflict between two mortal enemies...

===PandaHalo Saga (''mid/late 2008 - February 2009'')===
[[Image:Pandasaga.jpg]]

{{main|PandaHalo}}

When Chris realized Blanca was a troll, he would move on to PandaHalo as his new sweetheart. The saga came to a quick and abrupt end when she was found to be bearing the child of Clyde Cash, conceived through rape. Unsurprisingly, Chris would quickly abandon Panda and she would (presumably) die in the Australian brushfires, despite living miles away from the incident. She would end up giving trolls the [[Scrapbook of Fail]] and [[Slideshow]].

===Miyamoto Saga (''January 2009 - 10 February 2009'')===
[[Image:Miyamotosaga.jpg]]

{{main|Miyamoto Saga}}

In the beginning of January 2009, Chris would be confronted by <s>[[Clyde Cash|a troll]]</s> [[Shigeru Miyamoto]], who would attempt to try to make his ''Sonichu'' game fantasy a reality. Chris's ineptitude and inability to do...well...anything other than be a lazy fuck resulted in horrible delays and stalls to the project's advancement. In the end, [[Reggie Fils-Aimé]] shut down the entire project with a scathing letter. This trolling encounter would have Chris give trolls a PowerPoint project that talked in great length about [[Chris and his ego|himself]]...and very little about his game.

===Julie Saga (''February 2009 - March 2009'')===
[[Image:Juliesaga.jpg]]

{{main|Julie}}

In February 2009 to early March 2009, Chris's latest sweetheart would be Julie, who was in actuality a young troll named [[BlueSpike]]. In this brief timeframe, BlueSpike would release the infamous [[sex tape]], force Chris to declare [[BILLY MAYS]] mayor of [[CWCville]] and destroy his second medallion by forcing him to stick it up his ass. However, BlueSpike's total and utter control over Chris would lead to a schism between trolls, leading to the creation of the [[PVCC (message board)|PVCC]] and this very wiki.

===Ivy Saga (''March 2009 - July 2009'')===
[[Image:Ivysaga.jpg]]

{{main|Ivy}}

In March 2009, Chris would meet and fall in love with Ivy, his then-latest sweetheart. His crush towards Ivy would lead Chris to create three special comics and two music videos, a practical [[semen|spurt]] of work that wouldn't be surpassed for awhile. The saga also revealed Chris at his [[I am devoted to My Sweetest Ivy|creepiest]] [[CWC's Message for Ivy|yet]], scarring many trolls and CWC-watchers. The saga also resulted in a [[CWC's ¨It's All Coming Back To Me¨|proposal of marriage]]. Despite the work spurt, the saga would come to an abrupt end thanks to a combination of troll interference from [[Joshua Martinez]] and interference from [[Bob Chandler]] and [[Rocky Shoemaker]], leading to Ivy's suicide.

===Liquid Chris Saga (''June 21, 2009 - 27 July 2011'')===
[[Image:Liquidsaga.jpg]]

{{main|Liquid Chris}}

In July 2009, the TRUE and HONEST Christan Weston Chandler would come forth after the other Chris would reveal himself as a troll in one video. The other Chris, [[Ian Brandon Anderson]], would challenge Chris to a sing-off, with the TRUE and HONEST CWC proving himself the victor in the end. The appearance of this other Chris would pressure the other into churning out more comics than he had before, currently heading for the completion of [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], something that many believed would never happen due to the interference of many trolls.

Later, Liquid would return to continue on his quest to get rid of this faker. In the process of this new entry to the saga, Ian and Chris would battle over the heart of Chris's true love, [[Kacey]]. In the end, the real Chris would win out and marry Kacey, leaving Ian to be butthurt. Liquid's YouTube account would eventually close on 27 July, 2011.

===CWCipedia Saga (''4 May 2009 – 26 June 2010'')===
[[Image:The CWCipedia Saga.jpg]]

{{main|CWCipedia}}

In early June 2009, Chris was given the CWCipedia, a wiki-styled web page, so that Chris can use it to upload his ''Sonichu'' comics, blog, and personal life safe from the trolls who instantly dive at his other web pages and hack them. It doubled as a source for the [[CWCki]] to draw many of Chris's latest failures from, making it his best friend and his worst enemy.

On 19 [[November 2009]], perhaps one of the greatest features the wiki introduced was the [[Mailbag]], in which a dump of all [[Fans|fan]] e-mails sent to the admin's address could be answered by Chris, for all to see. This feature provided insight into how Chris responds to trolls through e-mail about his views on, for example, homosexuality, GodJesus, autism, etc.

Since 23 November 2009, advertisements linking to porn sites, gay rights organizations, information on Asperger's syndrome, and the [[Asperchu|Asperpedia]] took residence on the CWCipedia, paid for by trolls. Eventually, Alec, the creator of Asperchu, paid Jack Thaddeus to replace most, if not all, of the ads with ads for Asperpedia. Chris had [[Address to my Cwcipedia SysOp|complained]] [[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence|repeatedly]] to the SysOp of the Wiki about these ads, which would have paid for the site until the end of 2010, pending negotiations.<ref>http://archive.cogsdev.org/cwcipedia/index.php?title=User_talk:ChrisChanSonichu</ref> All of this had "stressed" Chris out to the point of uploading videos of himself screaming [[death threats]] upon the advertisers' heads, and creating a separate, stress-free, ad-free front page.

This saga would lead to the site being shut down twice in a row, both due to copyright infringement, and would lead to the death of [[Simonla Rosechu]] in the most humiliating way - death by exploding toilet.

The Asperpedia team would continue to vandalize and hijack CWCipedia in a variety of ways until it finally collapsed in May, and Chris finally abandoned the site after already making numerous claims that he'd quit the Internet forever. After Mao moved in to fill the void, he passed ownership to [[Alec]] and [[Vivian Gee]], wherein they took over the site and the rights to Sonichu to begin ''Sonichu'' Season 2, where ultimately, on 26 [[June 2010]], the entire site would be terminated along with the entirety of the original 110mb server.

===Asperchu Saga (''November 2009 - 30 August 2011'')===
[[Image:The Asperchu Saga.jpg]]

{{main|Asperchu}}

In late November 2009, an artist named Alec Benson Leary started a new series called ''Asperchu'', starring the titular Electric Asperger's Hedgehog Pokemon. Chris had spent most of December ignoring ''Asperchu'' and its popularity before finally exploding with rage, claiming the series as nothing more than fan fiction and a parody. The popularity of ''Asperchu'', combined with Chris's continuing downward spiral that is [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], has led many of Chris's fans to abandon ''Sonichu'' and go to ''Asperchu''.

Most of the saga has been spent with Chris raging at not just Alec, but also [[Evan]], Sean, and Asperpedia admin Mao over their usage of their characters and how they mock him. As well, Chris has been dealing with Evan over the usage of Simonla Rosechu, with Chris going so far as to deny reality and substitute it with his own.

In terms of productivity, it has given us ''Sonichu'' #10, which showcases Chris going all out in trying to get rid of everything he hates, including homosexuality and trolls. In that same book, Chris kills all four trolls involved in this saga as retaliation for making him kill Simonla Rosechu. Also, [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Calls|nine phone calls]] have been leaked. These phone calls show Alec attempting to get through to Chris and his way of thinking and Chris fighting tooth and nail not to change at all.

In the aftermath of the saga, Evan ceased his ''Simonchu'' comic, proud to have Simonla removed, Alec and Sean continued their respective comics, and Mao continues to poke and jab at Chris. And while the saga had for the most part died down, Asperpedia continued to harass its rival CWCipedia, either by placing new ads, vandalizing it, or shutting it down altogether. One of the post-trial ads even precipitated Chris's falling out with [[Jackie e-mails|Jackie]].

Alec Benson Leary would later be [[Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher|called out]] by Chris in 2011, and is identity was "revealed" as Christopher Paul Whitney, followed by Chris [[Chris and Health]]|sloppily devouring a cheap microwavable pizza]].

===Surfshack Tito Saga (''2 March 2010 - 10 August 2011'')===
[[Image:The Surfshack Tito Saga.jpg]]

{{Main|Surfshack Tito}}

Sometime in January 2010, Chris met and fell in love with a certain girl in real life, hoping she would be the one who'd end his streak of being a [[virgin with rage]]. On 9 March 2010, Chris would release a ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]'' video of a stage based off a book he was helping write with his gal-pal...and release a name in the process. Dedicated trolls used the information to discover the gal-pal's identity, but decided to let the [[lulz]] spread naturally. The next day, however, a troll revealed the information to the gal-pal, codenamed [[The Wallflower]], and while one set of lulz was stopped, another one was set into motion.

The troll, calling himself Surfshack Tito, claimed responsibility for not only hacking his PSN accounts for the umpteenth time, but also stealing The Wallflower from Chris. Chris, in response, has threatened to go all out and seemingly try to murder Tito, threatening him with a [[pocket knife]], attacking him with [[Chris Drops the N-Bomb|racial slurs]], and flashing his [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|underwear]] in the process. At the same time, Chris has discovered and declared war on the CWCki, demanding that all pages involving himself, his friends and family be altered to suit his needs. In short order, Chris's attack on the CWCki fell utterly short.

The creativity here has been utterly stunted, especially after The Wallflower left him. He has gone on to blame his fans for wanting him to make more comics and compared them to the trolls that have tormented him. He has also vowed to leave the Internet forever, though he ended up reshowing his face 36 hours after his vow...

Echoes of this saga would be eventually heard in [[August 2011]] when, after announcing his glorious comeback to the Internet, Chris claimed to have discovered the true identity of Tito and tried to blackmail him using this information. Tito eventually [[Tito's official response to Chris|gave into his demands]], which Chris later acknowledged and accepted.

=== The GAMe PLACe Saga (''pre-2005 - present'')===
{{main|The GAMe PLACe|Michael Snyder}}

For a long time, Chris had been visiting The GAMe PLACe on a regular basis. It was here that Chris would meet Megan herself, as well as [[Lucas]] and [[Mimms]], two people who would deliver a number of intel over Chris during his time there. He also participated in the ''[[Pokemon TCG]]'' League, using his own poorly made decks. However, Chris was a pain to the store's manager, [[Michael Snyder]] and by August 2008, tired of Chris terrorizing various [[niggos|patrons]], yelling at children, bogarting the TV and being an all-round pain. Michael would finally ban Chris from the store, embarrassing him and his mother in the process. It wouldn't be the end, however.

On multiple occasions, Chris returned to the store despite Michael's insistence that he never come back. He tried emails, sneaking in, [[Apology to Game & Hobby Place|pleading]] on [[YouTube]], but nothing worked. The first time he attempted (unsuccessfully, of course) to lift his ban in person was with a prepared, [[Chris and remorse|faux-apologetic speech]]. When that failed, he stormed out angrily and called Michael a [[Chris and race|JEW]], then attempted to rally his "fanbase" and get them [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|to troll him]]. [[6 June 2010|The next occasion]] was much more disturbing. He claimed he was trying to take a picture of Michael for a dartboard, but was caught in the act and was chased in the parking lot. Nearly running over Michael and his daughter, eventually the [[Jerkops]] got involved, but they did not arrest him. Michael accused him of trying to take [[pedofork|pictures of his daughter]]. Whether it's true or not, it's [[Kacey|confirmed]] that Chris has stalker tendencies.

The saga was revived in October 2011, when Chris and [[Barb|his mother]] visited the GAMe PLACe, and [[28 October 2011|an incident occurred]]. Exact details of events remain unknown, but charges such as assaulting a law enforcement official and property damage of more than $1000 were brought against the two. Chris and Barb have since had their preliminary hearings, and Michael Snyder has brought civil charges against both of them. The outcome of these events remains to be seen.

==Intermittent Sagas==

===The CWC Exile Saga (''20 March 2010 - 29 August 2010'')===

{{main|Rocky Shoemaker|Fridays After Five|Flipnote Hatena}}

After Chris lost The Wallflower and fought with Surfshack Tito, an outside force attempted to push Chris away from the Internet. No less than five times, Chris has boldly claimed that he has abandoned the Internet and smugly told his detractors that they should go outside and live their lives, advice Chris should have followed ''years'' ago. However, Chris still latched onto the Internet as much as he could, trying to find ways to sneak in without the force discovering him.

Trolls would end up discovering Chris dancing like a dying turkey at [[Fridays After Five]], then discover that he had set up shop at the [[Flipnote Hatena]], where he tried to spread his sick and twisted thoughts to younger, innocent people before being shut down. However, the thing that would finally bring Chris back to the Internet and end his exile would be [[The MovingForward videos|the destruction of his beloved Life Upgrade]]. At his own hands, no less!

==Post-exile==

===Jackie Saga (''April 5, 2010 - November 26, 2010'')===
[[Image:JackieSaga.jpg]]

{{main|Jackie}}

Following the fallout of The Wallflower incident, Chris pulled himself away from the Internet, only for him to meet and begin conversing to a woman named Jackie. Meeting her at [[The Hook Cafe|''The HooK'' Café]], the two began conversing through [[Jackie Emails|e-mails]], revealing the rationale in Chris's attempts to get back into The GAMe PLACe and showing [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV|he's still incredibly disturbing]]. However, Chris broke off his relationship with her after she attempted to get him to change his life for the better.

Around [[September 2010]], Jackie and Chris were confirmed to have attempted to try again with a relationship, with Chris creating [[100_2265|even]] [[ECV 00002|more]] [[Pregnant Act|disturbing]] [[Don'tPintheOop|videos]] in the process. A third party - [[Lars]] McNulty, Jackie's ex-boyfriend - stepped in by the end of September, prompting Chris to release several videos attacking his newfound enemy. Video updates became increasingly bizarre, but still occurred regularly until the end of [[October 2010|October]].

By [[November 2010|November]], the leaked correspondence showed that Jackie was getting increasing impatient as Chris kept failing to fulfill her requests, while Chris made up a lot of lame excuses for why he could not deliver on them, all while continuously begging Jackie to have sex with him. On November 26, Jackie would send Chris the latest in a string of e-mails in which she criticized him for his laziness and unwillingness when it came to pay a more active part in relationships, and how he, despite of this, kept begging her for sex. Chris stopped responding at this point, putting an end to the saga.

===Tomgirl Saga (''28 April 2011 - present'')===
[[Image:Cwctl.jpg]]

{{main|Tomgirl Pictures}}

In mid-2011, Chris's exile from the Internet continued, and his mental state deteriorated. Some leaked evidence of [[Wikipedia:Transvestitism|transvestitism]] surfaced in [[April 2011|April]], and later joined the [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia]] forum, where his posts showed that Chris and sanity were only vague acquaintances. However, when Chris found out he was discovered on the forums, he decided to fight back by [[Calling Out]] various [[trolls]], demanding that they apologize and leave the Internet or they would have their information revealed and be trolled in return. He managed to drive away some trolls, including Surfshack Tito, before the saga was utterly derailed by the death of his father, [[Bob]].

==The Future==
If anything remains clear, it is that Chris is incapable of applying past events to current ones. Given this, it is likely that Chris will be enduring one saga or another until the day he dies.

==See also==
*''[[Excel Saga]]''

==References==
<references/>

[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category: Sagas]]

Surfshack Tito (troll)

2011-12-05T00:55:42Z

Croatchu:

[[Image:Tito 300.gif|frame|It's easy to see what the Wallflower fell for, isn't it?]]
{{Quote|God damn womanizing, raping... trollin' stupid [[pickle suit]]ed... [[nigger]]!|Chris on Tito<ref>[[Chris Drops the N-Bomb]]</ref>}}
'''Surfshack Tito''' (also known as [[Calling Out|Don]]) is a mysterious [[troll]] who first emerged in early [[March 2010]]. His arrival was reminiscent of the rise of [[Jack Thaddeus]] in the summer of 2009. Like Jack, he first made his mark by hacking [[Chris]]' [[PS3|PlayStation Network]] accounts.

The nickname "Surfshack Tito" is a reference to the corpulent surf-shop owner from the [[Wikipedia: Nickelodeon| Nickelodeon]] kids' cartoon ''[[Wikipedia:Rocket Power|Rocket Power]]''. During the exchanges with Chris, most of them from Tito are ended with a Tito-styled word of wisdom. The choice to go with the name is most likely inspired by an infamous copypasta about Tito.

Based on Chris's insults towards Tito in the e-mails and videos, it was assumed that Chris believes that [[Chris and Reality|the actual Tito from ''Rocket Power'' is trolling him.]] However, the truth is that the image attached to an e-mail shows a photoshopped image of the Wallflower standing next to a [[niggo|really tall dark guy]]. The photo is left out of this article due to an agreement with [[the Wallflower]].

==Tito in Chris's videos==
Chris first addressed Tito in a [[Surfshack Tito (video)|video]] released on 2 March 2010. His comments were brief and cryptic. Chris merely referred to [[Wikipedia: Josip Broz Tito|Tito]] [[Wikipedia: Tito Jackson|by]] [[Wikipedia: Tito Ortiz|name]], threatened him with doom in his nightmares, and delivered a [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha#Execution_and_effect|Curse Shot]] attack.

Shortly afterward, [[Clyde Cash]] explained that Tito had hacked Chris's PSN account a few days prior, in late February. This revelation was accompanied by another info-dump concerning Chris's ongoing [[List of Chris's PSN game downloads|downloadable]] [[List of Chris's PSN video downloads|content]] spending spree.

A week later, trolls discovered the identity of [[the Wallflower]], throwing Chris into a flailing rage. Initially, Chris seemed to blame Clyde for the breakup of his latest one-sided relationship, but on 14 March 2010, he released a [[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!|video]] suggesting that he viewed Tito as the culprit. In that clip, he declares: "Tito. Listen to me, you son of a bitch. Your-your days are numbered." Threats involving a shillelagh and Chris's deadly [[pocket knife]] followed.

Tito apparently kept up the pressure on Chris through the next few days of March 2010. On 18 March, Chris released [[Chris Drops the N-Bomb|yet another threatening video]], in which he accused Tito of stealing the Wallflower from him, called him a "womanizing rapist" and a "[[Man in the Pickle Suit|pickle-suited]] [[nigger]]", and alluded to e-mails he had received from Tito (their contents unspecified, but Chris definitely didn't like them).

However, since the end of the Wallflower [[saga]], Surfshack Tito has slipped from Chris's consciousness and has not made any further appearances in Chris's videos. He is, however, an important figure behind the [[Fashion_Square_Mall#Chris_captured_on_video|August 2010 videotaped encounter of Chris at Fashion Square Mall]].

[[Image:Surfshack Tito.jpg|thumb|Tito in real life, enjoying a ukulele after another successful trolling plan.]]

In August 2011, Chris returned after a hiatus from YouTube to [[Calling Out|announce]] that he had received documents which revealed Tito's real identity. Referring to him as Don, Chris demanded a public apology from Tito for [[Wikipedia:PlayStation_Network_outage|hacking the PSN]], and $1,000 among other things.

==E-mails with Chris==
{{main|Surfshack Tito E-mails}}
During mid-March 2010, Tito exchanged several e-mails with Chris, baiting him with regard to the revelation of the Wallflower's identity and other subjects. Their conversations reveal that Chris was aware of his gal-pal's interest in gay slash fiction, and was apparently willing to look past it (the quest for [[china]] trumping all other considerations). The e-mails also feature Chris employing the word "nigger" with [[Chris and race|great enthusiasm]]. Note that Surfshack Tito is actually Hawaiʻian, not a [[niggo]].

Between late August and early September 2010, [[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails|Tito resurfaced]] in Chris's failed plot to scam him and Clyde Cash. Their e-mails reveal Chris's intentions behind destroying his PS3 and waiting at the mall; he sought a bounty of $9,001 towards his PS3's destruction and very poorly attempted to cheat Tito and Clyde out of the money.

==See also==
*[[Jack Thaddeus]]
*[[Surfshack Tito (video)]]
*[[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!]]
*[[Chris Drops the N-Bomb]]
*[[Surfshack Tito E-mails]]
*[[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails]]

{{Trolls}}
{{DEFAULTSORT:Tito, Surfshack}}

[[Category:Trolls]]
[[Category: Surfshack Tito Saga]]

Surfshack Tito (troll)

2011-12-05T00:54:59Z

Croatchu:

[[Image:Tito 300.gif|frame|It's easy to see what the Wallflower fell for, isn't it?]]
{{Quote|God damn womanizing, raping... trollin' stupid [[pickle suit]]ed... [[nigger]]!|Chris on Tito<ref>[[Chris Drops the N-Bomb]]</ref>}}
'''Surfshack Tito''' (also known as [[Calling Out|Don]]) is a mysterious [[troll]] who first emerged in early [[March 2010]]. His arrival was reminiscent of the rise of [[Jack Thaddeus]] in the summer of 2009. Like Jack, he first made his mark by hacking [[Chris]]' [[PS3|PlayStation Network]] accounts.

The nickname "Surfshack Tito" is a reference to the corpulent surf-shop owner from the [[Wikipedia: Nickelodeon| Nickelodeon]] kids' cartoon ''[[Wikipedia:Rocket Power|Rocket Power]]''. During the exchanges with Chris, most of them from Tito are ended with a Tito-styled word of wisdom. The choice to go with the name is most likely inspired by an infamous copypasta about Tito.

Based on Chris's insults towards Tito in the e-mails and videos, it was assumed that Chris believes that [[Chris and Reality|the actual Tito from ''Rocket Power'' is trolling him.]] However, the truth is that the image attached to an e-mail shows a photoshopped image of the Wallflower standing next to a [[niggo|really tall dark guy]]. The photo is left out of this article due to an agreement with [[the Wallflower]].

==Tito in Chris's videos==
Chris first addressed Tito in a [[Surfshack Tito (video)|video]] released on 2 March 2010. His comments were brief and cryptic. Chris merely referred to [[Wikipedia: Josip Broz Tito|Tito]] [[Tito Jackson|by]] [[Tito Ortiz|name]], threatened him with doom in his nightmares, and delivered a [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha#Execution_and_effect|Curse Shot]] attack.

Shortly afterward, [[Clyde Cash]] explained that Tito had hacked Chris's PSN account a few days prior, in late February. This revelation was accompanied by another info-dump concerning Chris's ongoing [[List of Chris's PSN game downloads|downloadable]] [[List of Chris's PSN video downloads|content]] spending spree.

A week later, trolls discovered the identity of [[the Wallflower]], throwing Chris into a flailing rage. Initially, Chris seemed to blame Clyde for the breakup of his latest one-sided relationship, but on 14 March 2010, he released a [[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!|video]] suggesting that he viewed Tito as the culprit. In that clip, he declares: "Tito. Listen to me, you son of a bitch. Your-your days are numbered." Threats involving a shillelagh and Chris's deadly [[pocket knife]] followed.

Tito apparently kept up the pressure on Chris through the next few days of March 2010. On 18 March, Chris released [[Chris Drops the N-Bomb|yet another threatening video]], in which he accused Tito of stealing the Wallflower from him, called him a "womanizing rapist" and a "[[Man in the Pickle Suit|pickle-suited]] [[nigger]]", and alluded to e-mails he had received from Tito (their contents unspecified, but Chris definitely didn't like them).

However, since the end of the Wallflower [[saga]], Surfshack Tito has slipped from Chris's consciousness and has not made any further appearances in Chris's videos. He is, however, an important figure behind the [[Fashion_Square_Mall#Chris_captured_on_video|August 2010 videotaped encounter of Chris at Fashion Square Mall]].

[[Image:Surfshack Tito.jpg|thumb|Tito in real life, enjoying a ukulele after another successful trolling plan.]]

In August 2011, Chris returned after a hiatus from YouTube to [[Calling Out|announce]] that he had received documents which revealed Tito's real identity. Referring to him as Don, Chris demanded a public apology from Tito for [[Wikipedia:PlayStation_Network_outage|hacking the PSN]], and $1,000 among other things.

==E-mails with Chris==
{{main|Surfshack Tito E-mails}}
During mid-March 2010, Tito exchanged several e-mails with Chris, baiting him with regard to the revelation of the Wallflower's identity and other subjects. Their conversations reveal that Chris was aware of his gal-pal's interest in gay slash fiction, and was apparently willing to look past it (the quest for [[china]] trumping all other considerations). The e-mails also feature Chris employing the word "nigger" with [[Chris and race|great enthusiasm]]. Note that Surfshack Tito is actually Hawaiʻian, not a [[niggo]].

Between late August and early September 2010, [[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails|Tito resurfaced]] in Chris's failed plot to scam him and Clyde Cash. Their e-mails reveal Chris's intentions behind destroying his PS3 and waiting at the mall; he sought a bounty of $9,001 towards his PS3's destruction and very poorly attempted to cheat Tito and Clyde out of the money.

==See also==
*[[Jack Thaddeus]]
*[[Surfshack Tito (video)]]
*[[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!]]
*[[Chris Drops the N-Bomb]]
*[[Surfshack Tito E-mails]]
*[[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails]]

{{Trolls}}
{{DEFAULTSORT:Tito, Surfshack}}

[[Category:Trolls]]
[[Category: Surfshack Tito Saga]]

November 2011

2011-12-03T14:33:52Z

Croatchu:

'''November 2011''' saw more fallout from the [[28 October 2011]] incident.

==Events==
*1 November: [[Michael Snyder]] files a civil suit against both [[Chris]] and [[Barb]] 4 days after [[28 October 2011|the GAMe PLACe incident]].
*4 November: Chris releases photographs of [[Michael Snyder]] from his latest visit to [[the GAMe PLACe]] to the [[CWCki]].
*7 November - Chris goes to court to answer charges of trespass, misdemeanor assault and failure to stop at the scene of an accident. None of the charges are dropped.
*12 November - The [[SPARKLE like you mean it: ROBEE'S BALLAD|debut album]] of [[Robee Sonee and the Tomgirls]], Chris's latest fictional band, is leaked.
*19 November - A [[dating ad.mp4|voice recording]] of a personal dating ad that Chris made [[2008|3 years ago]] is finally discovered.
*22 November - Two [[prank calls]] are released by [[TheCWCvilleLibrary]], who received them from an [[Trolls|anonymous]] source. Ironically, one of the calls (made with a Chris soundboard) was made to the GAMe PLACe on 27 October 2011.

{{Timeline}}

November 2011

2011-11-29T21:56:31Z

Croatchu:

'''November 2011''' will see more fallout from the [[28 October 2011]] incident.

==Events==
*1 November: [[Michael Snyder]] files a civil suit against both [[Chris]] and [[Barb]] 4 days after [[28 October 2011|the GAMe PLACe incident]].
*4 November: Chris releases photographs of [[Michael Snyder]] from his latest visit to [[the GAMe PLACe]] to the [[CWCki]].
*7 November - Chris goes to court to answer charges of trespass, misdemeanor assault and failure to stop at the scene of an accident. None of the charges are dropped.
*12 November - The [[SPARKLE like you mean it: ROBEE'S BALLAD|debut album]] of [[Robee Sonee and the Tomgirls]], Chris's latest fictional band, is leaked.
*19 November - A [[dating ad.mp4|voice recording]] of a personal dating ad that Chris made [[2008|3 years ago]] is finally discovered.
*22 November - Two [[prank calls]] are released by [[TheCWCvilleLibrary]], who received them from an [[Trolls|anonymous]] source. Ironically, one of the calls (made with a Chris soundboard) was made to the GAMe PLACe on 27 October 2011.

{{Timeline}}

Calling Out

2011-11-28T12:57:53Z

Croatchu: Bobs death is no longer the main reason Chris won't be making videos

'''Calling Out''' refers to a series of [[videos]] [[Chris]] uploaded from the 6th to the 23rd of [[August 2011]], following an [[100 2357.MOV|8 month hiatus]] from [[YouTube]].

These videos showcase Chris's [[Tomgirl]] look, where he attempts to make himself look feminine. Chris is sporting new earrings in these videos, two on his right ear and one on his left. His [[Pedo-Glasses|glasses]] are also absent. [[Chris and cinematography|Chris's camerawork]] in this series is exceptionally shitty, opting to hold the camera with his hand instead of propping it up on a surface. This results in a very shaky, Cloverfield-like viewing experience.

The series focuses on Chris's efforts to expose his various trolls. Each confrontation consists of Chris decrying various traits of his trolls (Thorg's atheism, Jack Thaddeus's sexual interests, etc.) followed by demands for apologies and other blackmail. Chris gives them deadlines to meet his demands (many of which are idiotic, e.g. asking Tito to send cash in the mail, or impossible, e.g. asking BlueSpike to stop random people all over the Internet from making [[prank calls]]). Chris seems to believe that if a troll's identity is revealed, all of the other trolls will turn on him and troll him instead of Chris. This is not likely.

Oblivious as always, Chris makes the videos while failing to realize that the obese horrific "tomgirl" delivering the messages overshadows the message. Instead, Chris just exposes people's personal information and expects the Internet to do the work for him of tormenting his foes.

==Summary==

{| class="wikitable"
|-
! Troll
! Calling out
!Demands
!Deadline
! Result
! Finale
|-
| [[Surfshack Tito (troll)|Surfshack Tito]]
| 6 August: [[Calling Out "Tito" - Don]] 6 August: [[Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"]]
| Admit to PlayStation Network hacking Apologize to [[The Wallflower]] and her family Send Chris $1,000 Delete all of his pages from the [[CWCki]] Apologize to Chris
|31 August
| Met demands
| 9 August: [[Calling Out "Tito" - Don|Tito's official response to Chris]] 10 August: [[Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
|-
| [[Thorg]]
| 6 August: [[Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]] 6 August: [[Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"]] 10 August: [[Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]
| Put up a billboard in New York City saying that Chris is [[Homos|straight]] Delete all of his pages from the CWCki Apologize to Chris
|31 August
| '''Unmasked'''
| 12 August: [[Exposed - Jeremy Slonwhite of Vancouver, BC Canada]] 20 August: [[Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"]] 28 August: [[Victory Rockout]]
|-
| [[Alec Benson Leary]]
| 9 August: [[Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher]]
| Apologize to Chris
|31 August
| '''Unmasked'''
| 30 August: [[Christopher Paul Whitney reveal]]
|-
| [[Jack Thaddeus]]
| 16 August: [[Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya]] 23 August: [[Re-Calling Ahuvia]]
| Apologize to Chris
|10 September
| '''Revealed himself'''
| 29 August: [[Response to ADF]]
|-
| [[BlueSpike]]
| 23 August: [[Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David]] 
| Apologize to Chris Stop people from calling Chris and yelling "JULAAAYY!"
|15 September
| Nothing *
|
|}
* Due to the events of [[28 October 2011]], it's unlikely that Chris will respond any time soon.

==References==
<references/>

{{Troll Videos}}

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011| 2011-08-05 c]]
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Reggie Fils-Aimé

2011-11-26T17:15:05Z

Croatchu:

[[Image:Reginald Fils-Aime.jpg|thumb|He has come here to kick autistic ass and chew bubblegum... and he's all out of bubblegum.]]
[[Image:ReggieAndChris.jpg|thumb|left|Separated at birth?]]

'''Reginald "Reggie" Fils-Aimé''' ({{IPA|[ˈfiːzɛmeɪ]}}), is the president of [[Nintendo]] of [[America]] and colleague of [[Shigeru Miyamoto]]. He is also an opponent of "true love" and possibly a [[virgin with rage|virgin]], according to Mr. Chandler.

Chris's contact with Reggie formed the second stage of the [[Miyamoto Saga]], beginning after Chris failed to make it to Redmond and no-showed his planned face-to-face meeting with Miyamoto towards the end of [[January 2009]]. Never one to mince words, Reggie gave Chris a tough but fair assessment of his personal life and his potential as a top-flight [[video game]] designer. Chris reacted poorly, accusing Reggie of [[Kick the Autistic|discriminating against him]] because of his [[autism]], comparing him to [[Mary Lee Walsh]], and eventually throwing an unrestrained tantrum after Reggie bluntly told him that their collaboration was over.

Chris [[CWC Update 30 January 2009|threatened]] to take Reggie and Miyamoto to [[Charlottesville]] court before going back on his word and BAWWWWing to them in an [[CWC Update 31 January 2009|apology video]].

Reggie's next video game, ''[[Kick the Autistic]]'', will be released for the Wii and DS in time for Christmas. [[Jimmy Hill]], meanwhile, currently owns the European and Japanese gaming rights to Sonichu.

==Fils-Aimé Saga==
On 26 [[January 2009]], Chris released a [[CWC Update 26 January 2009|video]] wherein he claimed that he had been to [[Redmond]] to visit Shigeru Miyamoto and begin working on a [[The Sonichu Chronicles|Sonichu video game project]]. This, of course, was a [[lie]]. As a result of Chris's failure to make his appointment with Miyamoto, Reggie began communicating with Chris two days later, and their conversation continued through the first week or so of February.
{{clear}}

{{quoteboxred|'''Hi, it's me Reggie. President of Nintendo of America''' from '''Reggie Fils-Aimé''' to '''Chris''' on 28 January 2009 1:16 AM
----

But right now, I'm just strictly Reggie. I'm not going to even bother sending this through my Nintendo email address. Because you know what? This isn't business. This is strictly personal. I have something to say to you, and you need to listen. This has nothing to do with Nintendo right now, this is just me and you. Mano e mano. Man to man. I don't normally do this, but hell, I just need to get this off my chest.

If you don't know who I am, then allow me to introduce myself. My name is Reggie Fils-Aime. I've been kicking ass and taking names ever since the E3 expo at [[2004]] where I made my debut, where from then on I eventually earned my position as president of this company.

I'm known to be a loud mouth. I don't take crap from anyone. So if you are easily offended, I suggest you stop reading. But don't worry, I'll try to go easy on you, key word being "try" here.

But with that out of the way, I just want to say something to you personally.

May I kindly ask, what the hell is wrong with you? Are you for real or what? I was there for everything. I saw Miyamoto waiting for up to 2 days in the bitter cold for you to show up and you stood him up. I was even there trying to arrange everything for you, even setting up someone to escort you to our building complete with bodyguards and full security because I knew you were concerned about safety. And for what? So you could just NOT show up? I mean, I don't even know what to think, it's just completely unbelievable.

I'm sorry but it just is. I heard what you said to Mr Miyamoto too, your reasons for not coming. And I just have to say. How old are you? You're 27, if I'm not mistaken right?

27! I mean, think about it, you are almost 30! What is a man of your age still doing being coddled by his parents? Let me tell you, when I was about your age, I was already married and had children!

Your autism isn't an excuse either. I've raised a son with autism who is far worse functioning than you are and he can easily make his own decisions. The only thing I see here is a person who is not only lazy and makes excuses, but cannot even take charge of his own life.

That right there is what made it pretty clear that there is no chance in hell you're going to get anywhere with this project. Nevermind the fact that your parents didn't want you to go (or that you still have to get your parents permission at your age).

Think about what happened if you did go, and you had to ask mommy and daddy for an OK on everything? Imagine what a complete disaster that would be. I mean, listen. Simply put, you are not fit to do business with us as you are not even in a position where you can make your own decisions, which is vital to survive in the workplace, and even life in general.

I mean, seriously, who the hell were we talking to? I don't know about you. But this deal was about Nintendo and you. This was not the deal between Nintendo and the parents of Christian Weston Chandler.

I'm sorry, but provided that this whole thing you pulled on us wasn't an elaborate prank, this project was doomed from the start. It's just completely ridiculous. It is impossible for anyone to do business with someone who still has to rely on their parents to make their decisions.

Right now, I don't see how anything good could come from any of this. The only way I could even see this going anywhere is if you were to somehow learn to become independent, like a person of your age should be, and try to do something so that you don't rely on your parents to decide things for you.

But I don't see that happening ever in the near future (nor is it really my job to even have to tell you this). And because of that, I don't see how you'll ever be able to do business with us.

And you know what? I'll just leave it at that. Also, forget recieving a letter from us (and for what? So your parents can read it out loud to you? For Christ sake). This whole thing is through.

Our company will gladly deal with people who are up to the task. But we cannot waste valuable time and money on children who have no means of actually doing their part (their part, as in not their parents but "their part") to cooeprate with us.

Sorry for the rant, but you've wasted so much of our time, money and effort that I had to personally do what I'm known for, and that is kicking ass and taking names.

I always tell it like it is, and I'll be damned if I ever change that. So consider this as the final notice, this whole thing is through. It was through as soon as you made it clear that you are not mature enough to do business with us.

Other than that, I have nothing more to add. Please feel free to complain about me not being professional, I get that all the time. But nobody ever doubts my ability to tell people the things they need to hear. And what I just told you is nothing but that.

Sincerely,

The man who has been kicking ass and taking names since [[2004]].

Reggie Fils-Aime
 President
 Nintendo of America
}}

{{quotebox|Well, it is good to make your acquaintance, Reggie. I have viewed your [[Wikipedia:Wii Music|WiiMusic]] Tip Video on my Wii recently, and your introduction basically expanded my knowledge of you personally. Allow me to offer my congratulations on you becoming President of N.O.A.; last I heard, from snail-mail exchange, y'all had a woman for a president (I can't recall her name at the moment), so for my knowledge now. :)

In response to your message, let me say that I deserved that; it was as shocking as Mr. Resetti in [[Animal Crossing]], but in the sense of personally expressing yourself, I mean the comparison as genuinely a positive compliment.

I feel Truly, Deepest Sorry for missing the appointment; I have made the mistake of not being clear in the fact of my being unable to make the trip, and trying to compensate with sending myself via snail-mail (in a sense). As much as it was due to the lack of support from my family, I Could Not afford the Travel Fare to [[Redmond]] in the first place. I am considered compusive with handling money, and since the first notice of the business between me and Mr. Miyamoto came up Mid-January, I felt like I was "[[Bob walks in|caught with my pants down]]". I had spent my last amount of money from [[Monthly tugboat|my Social]] that I get every month to pay rent to my family, make payments on my Credit Card Bills, and even after that, I would have had only a hundred or so left over, and I had already compulsively spent that on the day I got the money on a couple of games. I feel at fault for not controling my compulsiveness enough to save a hundred at a time months before.

Then there is the mixture of Ligitimate business e-mail, from you all for example, and e-mails from [[Internet]] [[Trolls]]/Bullies/[[Impostor]]s, and among the chaos and confusion, I felt out of sorts, even the moments when I felt calmed down after a time from the stress. And my mother and father felt at unease amongst that confusion as well. Even when I put it up to my friends at my church; the same thing; they thought I was talking to an impostor, posing as Mr. Miyamoto. But after I received the automated e-mail from donotreply@noa.nintendo.com verifying Mr. Miyamoto's e-mail address as legitimate, I felt MOST Confident that I was dealing with the real Miyamoto. And yet, even after presenting the printout of that e-mail, everyone was still in doubt.

I have made great effort to seek local aid to fund me for the trip to Redmond, but unfortunately, I failed. It was heavily advised that I have the business between me and Miyamoto hand-written on Paper sent to me to present to my Attorney. Also, considering the rumors were Flying Heavily among the Internet Troll Population, if I had made the trip, I felt I might have been heavily physically harmed by those [[Death threats|vicious people]].

I will not disagree with the accusations of my emotions. Even though my family are of Great Business Expierences (let me also mention that my father, Mr. [[Bob|Robert Franklin Chandler, Jr.]], while working at G.E. ([[Wikipedia:General Electric|General Electric]]) has designed the Controls for the Plastic Molding Machines, so without him, we would not have anything Plastic as simple as a Funnel, or even the casing for the NES), I feel that I personally lack heavy business expierences that I would require. Due to my mental block, I feel that I would require someone to speak for me in the beginning of a Heavy amount of Business. They also gave me a small amount of the words that were typed to Mr. Miyamoto, especially the requests for the advance in travel fare so I could have made the trip. While [[Chris and money|I personally understand the economical situations]] prohibiting the advance, my family, as well as the Majority of my Church's Congregation, disagree. With that one bit of green absent from being advanced, it set the Ground for the locally popular disbelief in my talking to Mr. Miyamoto.

If I did have the money advanced to me for the trip, my [[Mother|escort]] and I would have Most Definitely made the flight.

Believe me, I have been feeling the worst stress from my being unable to afford the trip, my attempt to compensate with the CD-R and DVD-R failing badly, having to cover-up in online discussions for my family and local friends' HUGE concern for my safety and health, and worst of all the shame I feel from all the stress.

I sincerely meant no harm, hostile behavior, or anything major like that from the words I have spoken, written and typed so far in this business transaction.

I Truly Want to Continue with the Sonichu Projects, because I require a brighter future to set me in good standings with my future wife and my future daughter, [[Crystal Weston Chandler]] (God promised her to me in a multiple of [[Dreams]]). So, I respectfully ask you to NOT Cancel it. With the Paper Documents Snail-Mailed to me, my efforts to save money for the trip, convincing my family, friends and attorney, getting my act well-prepared and well-together, and my Female [[Sweetheart]] by my side (she's [[Panda Halo|on her way to me from Australia]]), I, [[Christian Weston Chandler]], will Truly Feel that I can Tackle the Project Head-On.

I appreciate your time and paitence, Reggie. And I have offered my deepest apologies to Mr. Miyamoto, as well as the Powerpoint Project and my [[CADD]] Plans for the [[Cwcville Shopping Center]] in two e-mails just recently.

Peace and Best Wishes, 
Christian Weston Chandler 
[[14 Branchland Ct.]] 
[[Ruckersville]], [[Virginia|VA]] 22968-9545 
(434)-990-0198 
Wii Number: 8626-5211-8387-4771 (Wii-Speak Capable) 
[[PSN]] ID: Sonichu ([[PSEye]] Capable)}}

{{quoteboxred|Listen, kid. I apologize for yelling at you, but if you know me, I am a guy who doesn't pull his punches. Let me tell you. They call me the most feared man in the game's industry, the "man who kicks ass and takes names." That Mr. Resetti comparison was kind of accurate actually. I guess I do deserve that title.

But I just have to be honest with you. I don't think you're ready for any of this. You seem to have a lot of issues in your life that you need to take care of before you can do business with anyone. I think right now Nintendo is the LEAST of your worries.

I mean, compulsive spending, severe paranoia, friends and family who do not trust you, you having to get their permission to do anything despite almost being 30, relying on social security and taxpayer money to survive, and the list goes on and on.

I'm sure if you had a job, didn't live with your parents, and were a self made man like a person of your age ought to be, you'd have no problem making it here.

But from what you're telling me, you've got a lot of issues and things to take care of in your life before you could ever reach such a state, and I wonder right now if I'm asking for the impossible right now.

Until then, I don't see how this could go anywhere. We've wasted so much time and money on this project only to find out that the man we're dealing with still is being coddled by his parents and doesn't even have a job or money of his own (taxpayer social security money issued to you for food/clothing doesn't count, which you shouldn't be spending on games anyway) or anything of that sort to even come through with this.

That is why I'm so frustrated with any of this. It's just so ridiculous. I've never seen anything like it. I thought we were dealing with a grown man, a self made man who could make his own decisions and come through with this. But what you've shown us is anything but that.

Sort out your own life first. Don't worry about Nintendo. Maybe once you finally grow up to be independent, sort out all the things preventing you from coming, and maybe even be able to make your own decisions and in life, then maybe at that point we'll be able to do business with each other.

But until then, I doubt we'll see anything come out of this. And even if it does work out at the moment, I can't imagine you being anything other than a huge liability for us. Being an independent person who can make his or her own decisions is paramount to survive in the business world, especially in the games industry. We don't have time to babysit you. While it may seem like all fun and games, this is a business for adults, not people who still depend on their parents to survive.

Sincerely, 
Reggie Fils-Aime}}

{{quotebox|I understand what you're telling me, Reggie.

But with statements like, " this is a business for adults, not people who still depend on their parents to survive," it makes me feel like I am being [[Kick the Autistic|discriminated against]]. I'm not one to judge, and I am capable of making my own [[The MovingFoward videos|sound decisions]] [[Attraction sign|in life]] [[Recycling|when it comes]] [[List of places that have banned Chris|down to it]]. My mind kinda rolled along with the moment, but the point is the discriminating statement pretty much.

Peace, 
Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|Yeah, but you have to understand. I don't understand how you're going to do anything, when you don't even have your own life sorted out.

You're not being discriminated against. I'm just saying that you're clearly not cut out for this. How can you expect to lead a project when you cannot even lead your own life?

You have problems with your family, you depend on social security (which you use for games instead of your own needs), you seem to be completely paranoid and above all else, I don't see you making a single sound decision on your own. It seems to be that you're still being raised by your parents. We were under the impression that we were making a deal with an accomplished comic book artist, but instead you show us that you're inconsiderate, you lack any sort of independence or maturity, and above all else, you seem like the kind of person that would be a liability for our company.

To me, it doesn't seem like you need a video game. It seems like you need to sort out your own life before you try to get involved with something like this, which to me, you don't seem to be cut out for at all.

Mr. Miyamoto has requested that I let him talk to you and that I try to hold back and be a bit more polite, but even he admits that it is very hard considering all you've made us go through recently.

I have very little hope for this project at this point and I don't see what the hell is the point of doing any of this anymore. This is a bridge to nowhere. I'm going to either have to decide to step in and stop it myself, or either that just sit back and watch it fail anyway since I don't see how this has any chance of becoming anything.

Sincerely, 
Reggie Fils-Aime}}

{{quotebox|'''Re: Hi, it's me Reggie. President of Nintendo of America'''
----

I see your point, Reggie, but YOU DID NOT HAVE TO CANCEL THE PROJECT INDEFINITELY! I mean, after I get things settled on my end, and when I have the [[monthly tugboat|funds]] to make the trip to Redmond, it would feel much beneficial to me to know that the Window is still OPEN for me. What I'm hearing here is that you've CLOSED the Window and sealed it with Concrete!

[[Chris and negotiation|I WILL NOT ACCEPT THAT!]]

I apologize for coming off strong, but the objectionable feeling is True to me at the moment, and I would appreciate it if you would Re-Open the Window for me, and UNSEAL the Window, so I can still have the opportunity open for me. I will need a financial setting with a good job for when I have my family and individuality set, and I personally feel it BEST if I still had the opportunity to Work with Nintendo and [[Sega]] to bring my Sonichu and [[Rosechu]] to life in the Video Game World.

Please let me know that this Same Window of Opportunity will remain open for me. And if it helps better my case, I recently won a 400 dollar [[Gamestop]] Gift Card from the [[Guitar Hero Be A Star Sweepstakes]] and received it in the FedEx; I spent 3/4 of the card on my Church's Congregation, and those who requested a game from the card; the Majority of them asked for Wii Titles; Two asked for WiiMusic, and one of those two also got a copy of Animal Crossing City Folk With the WiiSpeak. And I ended using the rest for myself on Super Mario Galaxy, WiiMusic, LoZ: Twilight Princess, [[Sonic]] Riders: Zero Gravity, ALL FOR NINTENDO Wii, and a WiiSpeak. And I still have a [[TRUE and LOYAL fanbase|HEAVY Positive and Loyal Sonichu and Rosechu Fanbase;]] You All at Nintendo will STILL be able to Gain More Money off of my Sonichu and Rosechu, especially when in the near future I will be most capable of flying to Redmond, meet with you and Mr. Miyamoto, and get this "Mario Party" Started.

Please reply with your contact information, including phone number, so I can contact you in the near future, when I TRULY WILL be ready. My Mind is SET on this, and I feel I can be Ready as early as the end of [[2009]]. You have my word as an Avid Gamer, [[Chris and Religion#Delusions of Godhood?|Lamb of God]], and Humble Human Being that I WILL work Very Hard to Save, Save, Save.

Peace, 
Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|'''RE: Hi, it's me Reggie. President of Nintendo of America'''
----

We're not interested in your project. I've seen [[Sonichu Powerpoint|the powerpoint]]. Apart from the fact that you are unable to manage for yourself, the powerpoint really was the final straw. It was filled with gratuitous and shameless drawings with every other frame showing some form of partial nudity or characters making out with each other.

I cannot even fathom how you managed to think that would be a good idea.

Not only that, you keep mentioning [[Sony]], which you should know is the bitter rival of Nintendo and our mortal enemy. I don't know if you've been paying attention, but in every presentation I have given, whenever I mention kicking some behind, it's always directed to Sony. If you knew anything about our company, that would have been completely obvious.

But those are all moot points compared to the fact that you have demonstrated that you are not cut out for this kind of work and that your actions and mode of behavior would be a total liability for our company.

This decision is final. We are not going to do business with you and that is all. Sort out your own life. We cannot help you.

This is it. Do not email me or beg me for anything else. This is final. I cannot stress that enough. And if you do email me again, I will just repeat myself over and over. This whole thing is over. Goodbye.

Sincerely, 
Reggie Fils-Aime}}

{{quotebox|'''Please DO NOT Pigeonhole Me or Sonichu'''
----

The LAST thing I need to feel is feeling like I've been Left within a tiny piece of shelfspace to collect dust and be forgotten.

Peace, 
Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|'''RE: Please DO NOT Pigeonhole Me or Sonichu'''
----

Actually I think it's for the better. Maybe you can learn something out of this whole exchange.

But other than that, there is nothing more I can say or do for you. I'd appreciate it if you stopped emailing me now and maybe instead took some time to reflect on how this went wrong on your part. But this whole thing is finalized and done, and I cannot help you nor do I have the time to keep sending you emails when we have no official business with each other.}}

{{quotebox|'''One last thing'''
----

I still would deeply appreciate a document of the past business words, aggrements and all that from between me, Mr. [[Miyamoto]] and you, Reggie, snail-mailed to my home address I've previously provided to you, for my personal records and future references, Please.

Peace, 
Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|'''RE: One last thing'''
----

It's not going to happen, pal. This is final. Don't take this personally.}}

{{quotebox|'''"Reply to your Reply"'''
----

Let me just say a few more things, and then I'll stop e-mailing you for a long while. There was Positively NO NUDITY at all in the Powerpoint Presentation. And What the heck is WRONG with True [[Love]] and Kissing? [[Christian Weston Chandler|Are you a Virgin yourself? Have you had a BUNCH of Bad Dates? Or are you soo Closed-Minded and Rednecked?]] I gave you respect after seeing you in that video on my Wii, yet you tell me that True Love is WRONG? You are just as bad or WORSE than the [[Mary Lee Walsh|Real-Life Mary Lee Walsh]], or as she is known as in the [[Comic]]s now, Slaweel Ryam.

I pity you if you've had your share of Bad Luck in True Love, yet at this point, you have just Lost My Respect.

True Love is a Truly Sacred Bond between WOMAN and MAN, and when they are together, they get attracted to each other very much to Kiss and later Make Love. [[Chris and Religion|GOD and JESUS WANTS US ALL TO EXPERIENCE and SHARE True, Straight LOVE!]] THERE IS NOTHING OBJECTIONABLE FROM THAT! I am a man who stand for [[China|True Love and Honesty]], in comics AND in Real Life, although I am still a Frustrated [[Virgin with Rage|Virgin with Autisim]] on the side. [[Chris and his Ego|AT LEAST I AM MAKING A POSITIVE DIFFERENCE IN KEEPING TRUE LOVE BETWEEN ONLY WOMAN AND MAN IN MY ACTIONS.]] On a Side-Note, I DESPISE ALL [[homos|HOMOSEXUAL MALES,]] PERIOD!

ALSO, I BET YOU PROBABLY [[Tobacky|SMOKE]] AND [[Chris and Hypocrisy|DRINK]], don't you? I SPEAK AGAINST THOSE AS WELL SINCE THEY ARE TOOLS TO SPEED YOU TO [[Chris and Death|DEATH]] WITH [[Chris and Health|CANCER,]] LIVER PROBLEMS, BAR FIGHTS AND AUTOMOBILE ACCIDENTS. GIVE UP THE HABITS! THEY ARE BEYOND [[rule 34|GROSS]] AND [[nudes|DISGUSTING!]]

<nowiki>*sigh*</nowiki>

Forgive me for raising my voice very loudly, but to ENCOURAGE the True, Straight Love that you obviously OBJECT, I felt it was Required and Necessary. [[Random Access Humour|I can be a "Resetti" too, Mr. Resetti.]]

Peace-Out, 
Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|There wasn't. I never said there was. You assume too much and are way too paranoid about things, this is why I don't want to deal with you. Imagine if you were to flip out on someone while in the workplace like this? It'd be a complete PR disaster.

But I never said nudity or implied anything about your characters sexual preferences.

What I was referring to what the panty shot of Rosechu in one of the first frames. Then you show two characters in bed making love to each other.

Just what the hell kind of game did you want Nintendo to make?

Nintendo has always been in the business of making games for the whole family. That includes children. That is why you need to check yourself before you wreck yourself, and you've shown that you're unable to do so.

Your mind seems too wired on other things. Your head seems to be in the clouds and you don't even know the first thing about being appropriate or tasteful. Did you think this game proposal would even be able to pass through the [[Wikipedia:Entertainment Software Rating Board|ESRB]]?

You know nothing about how the industry works. About things such as company reputation, age appropriate content or content that won't get shot down by the ESRB (look at the whole "[[Wikipedia:Hot Coffee minigame controversy|Hot Coffee]]" GTA scandal for example). You just think you can do whatever you want and hope it flies.

Also from what I recall, you sent drawn pornography drawn in colored pencil/marker to Mr. Miyamoto TWICE. Imagine if you did this to someone in a business situation. Do you want me to hire you when you are such a loose cannon?

It's not possible. I can't risk having such a huge liability. And in fact, your behavior is the reason I've decided to remove you indefinitely from Nintendo, and I hope that someday you get your act together (which I don't see happening any time soon).

But until then, this project is over and gone for good. If anything was the last straw, it was this email. I don't have time to fight with you, you are completely unstable, irresponsible and the kind of person who would probably flip out or even hurt someone if he were to put in the workplace.

I'm glad you made that video and cleared everything up. But now, just leave me alone. I'm not going to even bother replying back after this, or if you keep this up.

Also, by the way. You didn't spell your name right at the end of the power point. You wrote it as "ChriSTAIN." That would be grounds for any potential employer to not hire someone. In addition to the behavior you've just displayed and the type of proposal you tried to make, the last thing we need is someone who can't even spell his own name.

Sincerely, 
Reggie Fils-Aime}}

{{quotebox|Well, the game would not Constantly revolve around the Background Romance; it's called a "Happy Ending".

Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|It's not something you show in a business proposal. There is a time and place for everything. But I don't understand why I have to tell this to you.

Either way, it's all over now and I don't want to deal with you anymore. I hope that someday someone takes you to seek consoling or behavioral therapy, and that you someday are able to manage on your own, because I don't have time to listen or try to help you as that is not my job.

Please leave me alone and I hope for the best.

Sincerely, 
Reggie Fils-Aime}}

{{quoteboxred|No means No, Chris.

Yeah, I saw your latest video there. I still don't think you get it.

The project cancellation was already signed into effect. There is nothing that can be done now. It is over.

You have no excuses. Your autism is not an excuse.

In fact, I cannot believe you for saying that. You continue to use your autism as a crutch and then continue to blame everything on it.

STOP!

Let me tell you right now, there is a difference between autism and pure irresponsibility/laziness. You are the latter, my friend, not the former.

Didn't I tell you that I once raised a son with autism? He had it much worse than you did. But guess what? He has a job, he is going to [[college]], and he sure as hell doesn't live in my house. He is able to manage for himself and I NEVER have to make any of his decisions for him.

What is the difference between you and him? I'll tell you, my son isn't lazy. He doesn't expect everyone just to give him everything. He knows that if he wants something, he has to work for it. And when he messes up, he doesn't blame his autism or people on the internet or anything else, he is able to know when he messed up and he takes responsibility for his own actions. And as a result he is a much better person for it.

You even try to blame me for "discriminating." That's complete malarkey. I've employed several people with autism, and even worse disabilities than you have.

But the thing is, those people are hard working and responsible. They want to work hard and they don't expect me to hold their hand and give them everything. And for one thing, they sure as hell don't still live with their parents at the age of 27.

You have demonstrated that you cannot get your act together and that you always want to put the blame on something else, whether it's autism, or even other people.

Pardon my [[Wikipedia:French language|french]], but that's bullshit. And whether you like it or not, that shit will never fly with me. That is why I am not going to have any part in your project and you're not going to be hired by us.

There is no excuse for your actions. You can give whatever excuse you want, but in the end it all comes down to you. Either learn how to take blame for yourself for when you mess up or don't even bother.

But either way, I want nothing to do with you because you've done so much to make me angry that I don't even know why I am still talking to you anymore. Just put a lid on it and go away.

Sincerely, 
Reggie Fils-Aime}}

{{quotebox|You can blame my constant NON-Acceptance of Cancelation to my [[Slow-in-the-mind|Red-Necked Personality Trait]] I picked up from my [[mother]].

I will NEVER accept a Cancel on the Project; it's Pigeonhole until I can make it or Continuation ONLY.

And, for the last time, I AM NOT LAZY!

Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|Accept it, because it already happened and now you're just wasting my time.}}

{{quoteboxred|Also stop blaming other people (or anything else) for your things that are your own fault. Taking responsibility for your actions is the first step to becoming a mature, more independant person who can manage for himself. You are acting like a spoiled little child right now.

And yes, not wanting to admit that you did anything wrong or always putting the blame on someone else so you don't have to take responsibility for it is indeed a sign of laziness and immaturity.

But why am I telling you this? It's useless. I can't seem to get through to you. You never even listen. Whatever I say goes from one ear out the other as you try to make up yet another excuse, over and over again.

There is no excuse you can make now though. The project was canceled and has been canceled indefinitely for a while now.

I am not going to even bother replying after this. Make up whatever excuse you want, resort to your same BS and blame everyone else but yourself, I don't care anymore.}}

{{quotebox|Well, I WILL continue to Haunt, Pester and Bother you until the project becomes Uncancelled and Shelved for until I AM ABLE to make the trip. I will Haunt Your [[Dreams]], with [[God]] by my side helping me to do that.

And if you do not like it, well I Triple-[[Dog]] Dare you AND Mr. Miyamoto to come to my house in [[Virginia]] Yourselves, talk to me and my family, and settle the matter like it should have been, have I been able to AFFORD to make the trip in the first place. Or, you all can very well bring me, my family and friends to [[Charlottesville|Charlotesville]], Virginia Court to settle this under a court of law. I have a SLEW of friends and family who will help me in court, and even define my own personal character as a humble human being.

Peace, 
Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dare us? That doesn't make any sense. Why should we come to your house? For one, we have no business with you now, and even if we did, you'd still have to make an appointment and come to our office.

But it's too late for that. We've already found someone who knows how to take responsibility for himself and conduct himself in an appropriate matter, and we're giving the project over to him.

He calls himself [[Clyde Cash]]. He's a real stand up guy. Unlike you, he took the initiative to not only to schedule an appointment with us and arrive on time (exactly on time, right at the very second), but also showed us the utmost respect and humility. Not once did he ever lash out at us, or harass us like you have done so far.

Not only that, he showed us that he can take care of himself, he has the leadership qualities we look for in an employee of this company.

He is a self made man with a honest hard working job, two degrees in things actually relevant to our business (one in game design, the other in fine arts, both from prestigious universities, and apparently he has degrees in many other things, he's a real a jack of all trades) and he even plans on getting married and having a child soon (he showed me a picture of him standing together with his future wife, [[Sarah]]. They make a good couple).

I don't understand why you couldn't be more like this guy? I mean, he came here on time, he didn't even have to beg us for money (and he even refused our offer to reimburse him), he is independent and lives on his own (you'll never see him ask his "mommy and daddy" for anything) and above all else, he's just all around a great guy who knows how to get things done and kick ass and take names.

I mean, couldn't you at least be half the guy this guy is? Is that too much to ask? But it doesn't matter now, we've finally found the guy we're looking for and you're not needed anymore.

Anyway, I look forward to working with our new business partner (and now, employee, as I have promoted him to a senior game designer position) and I can't wait start working with him on this project.

Be on the lookout for it, because this is going to be good, very good, even better than anything you offered us, and honestly better than anything we've ever seen. This Cylde Cash guy, he's brilliant. I'm thinking he could easily become the next Miyamoto, or even better. But yeah, this is going to be good.

Even though you'll have no part in this, I'm sure you'll still be able to enjoy it once it comes out because something this good, I mean, it would be downright stupid to want to miss something like this. It's going to be amazing.

Sincerely, 
Reggie Fils-Aime}}

{{quotebox|Clyde is NOT stealing my [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]], is he?}}

{{quoteboxred|Sorry that's classified information.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear Chris,

We sent a letter to you. I'm sure you heard from a man named Mike Chandler by now. It's true, Mr. Miyamoto no longer has an appointment scheduled with you, nor will we acknowledge any longer that he had any correspondence with you anymore. The project is dead and buried and all [[Nintendo]] employees have been told to never acknowledge that the project ever existed. 
I already told you before that the project was canceled due to your inaction. We will not accept any more unsolicited game suggestions or business requests from you. As we mentioned, Mr. Miyamoto does make occasional business trips to the U.S. (and your previous appointment, which has expired and been erased from memory, was one of those trips), but for now he is back in Japan where he usually spends the majority of his time.

Now that you have received the letter, consider the cancellation official. It was nice doing business with you, but we will not make any games or take any ideas you have into consideration nor will we make Sonichu the game or anything related to it.

Sincerely, 
Reggie Fils-Aime 
President 
Nintendo of America, Inc.}}

{{quotebox|And it is Official that YOU, Sir ARE an IMPOSTOR. You blatently croped and copied a piece of the letterhead from the letter I've uploaded onto my server, and you have obviously forged that signature.

I am Ceasing my contact with you at Your current E-mail address, as well as "Mr. Miyamoto"'s E-mail address, because You BOTH were IMPOSTOROUS [[trolls|TROLLS]]. So you can QUIT your Cherade, you bastards.

Christian C.}}

==See also==

* [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 30th, 2009]]
* [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 31st, 2009]]
* [[The Sonichu Chronicles]]

==External links==
*[[Wikipedia:Reggie Fils-Aime|Wikipedia article on Reggie Fils-Aimé]]

{{People}}
{{DEFAULTSORT:Fils-Aimé, Reggie}}

[[Category:People]]
[[Category:Trolls]]
[[Category:Video Games]]
[[Category: Miyamoto Saga]]

My Coke Rewards

2011-11-26T17:09:07Z

Croatchu:

[[Image:rubi_110309.jpg|thumb|Chris, the closet telenovela fan. Who'd have thought?]]

'''My Coke Rewards''' is a loyalty program that rewards frequent Coca-Cola drinkers with various products.

Chris has 8,000 points, enough to buy the most valuable prizes available through the program four times over.

Chris drinks about 1.8 litres (over three pints) of Coke ''every day'' (assuming that none of it was drank by his equally obese parents). This represents a grotesque 195 grams (nearly seven ounces) of sugar per day from Coke alone, representing almost ''nine hundred'' calories. To put that in perspective, Chris drank enough Coke to fill ''ten oil barrels'' in order to achieve said amount of points. [[30 Push-Ups|Needless to say]], [[Chris and health|the effects are staggering.]]

==Chris's Coke Habits==

[[Image:ChrisAfterCoke.png|thumb|Chris in the future, walking down a pier with his son [[Reginald Chandler|Reginald]]. The resemblance to [[Barbara Chandler|Mom]] is uncanny.]]
[[File:Cocacola effects.png|thumb|The effects of Coke. This cant be good for his health.]]

3 Points: Any Bottle (including water, up to 2L)

10 Points: 12 Pack of Cans (Or 12 water bottles)

20 Points: 24 Pack of Cans (Or 24 water bottles)

25 Points: 36 Pack of Cans

{| class="wikitable"
!Date
!Point per Soda
!Amount of Soda
!Bottles of Soda
!Cans of Soda
!Total Points
!Bonus?
|-
|3/6/07
|3
|3
|3
|0
|9
|No
|-
|3/8/07
|3
|9
|9
|0
|27
|No
|-
|3/10/07
|3
|7
|7
|0
|21
|No
|-
|3/13/07
|3
|4
|4
|0
|12
|No
|-
|3/14/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|3/15/07
|3
|7
|7
|0
|21
|No
|-
|3/18/07
|3
|8
|8
|0
|24
|No
|-
|3/24/07
|3
|4
|4
|0
|12
|No
|-
|3/26/07
|3
|4
|4
|0
|12
|No
|-
|3/27/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|4/1/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|4/3/07
|3
|9
|9
|0
|27
|No
|-
|4/7/07
|3
|8
|8
|0
|24
|No
|-
|4/8/07
|3
|6
|6
|0
|18
|No
|-
|4/10/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|4/12/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|4/14/07
|3
|8
|8
|0
|24
|No
|-
|4/17/07
|3
|2
|2
|0
|6
|No
|-
|4/19/07
|3
|1
|1
|0
|3
|No
|-
|4/21/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|4/22/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|4/25/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|4/28/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|4/29/07
|3
|9
|9
|0
|27
|No
|-
|5/2/07
|3
|18
|18
|0
|54
|No
|-
|5/2/07
|0
|0
|0
|0
|10
|Yes
|-
|5/3/07
|3
|2
|2
|0
|6
|No
|-
|5/5/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|5/7/07
|3
|7
|7
|0
|21
|No
|-
|5/9/07
|3
|4
|4
|0
|12
|No
|-
|5/12/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|5/13/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|5/14/07
|3
|1
|1
|0
|3
|No
|-
|5/16/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|5/17/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|5/21/07
|3
|8
|8
|0
|24
|No
|-
|5/22/07
|3
|8
|8
|0
|24
|No
|-
|5/23/07
|3
|9
|9
|0
|27
|No
|-
|5/26/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|5/27/07
|3
|9
|9
|0
|27
|No
|-
|5/31/07
|3
|19
|19
|0
|57
|No
|-
|6/2/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|6/5/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|6/6/07
|3
|9
|9
|0
|27
|No
|-
|6/7/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|6/9/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|6/10/07
|3
|18
|18
|0
|54
|No
|-
|6/12/07
|3
|1
|1
|0
|3
|No
|-
|6/14/07
|3
|1
|1
|0
|3
|No
|-
|6/17/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|6/18/07
|3
|5
|5
|0
|15
|No
|-
|6/21/07
|3
|16
|16
|0
|48
|No
|-
|6/25/07
|3
|5
|5
|0
|15
|No
|-
|7/3/07
|3
|20
|20
|0
|60
|No
|-
|7/7/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|7/9/07
|3
|9
|9
|0
|27
|No
|-
|7/11/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|7/14/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|7/17/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|7/17/07
|3
|0
|0
|0
|27
|Yes
|-
|7/24/07
|3
|5
|5
|0
|15
|No
|-
|7/24/07
|3
|0
|0
|0
|6
|Yes
|-
|7/28/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|7/28/07
|3
|0
|0
|0
|30
|Yes
|-
|8/4/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|8/6/07
|3
|1
|1
|0
|3
|No
|-
|8/7/07
|3
|9
|9
|0
|27
|No
|-
|8/9/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|8/11/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|8/15/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|8/18/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|8/20/07
|3
|9
|9
|0
|27
|No
|-
|8/20/07
|10
|1
|0
|12
|10
|No
|-
|8/24/07
|3
|8
|8
|0
|24
|No
|-
|8/24/07
|10
|2
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|8/29/07
|3
|8
|8
|0
|24
|No
|-
|8/29/07
|10
|2
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|9/1/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|9/8/07
|3
|9
|9
|0
|27
|No
|-
|9/8/07
|10
|1
|0
|12
|10
|No
|-
|9/9/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|9/12/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|9/13/07
|3
|9
|9
|0
|27
|No
|-
|9/13/07
|20
|1
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|9/18/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|9/24/07
|3
|9
|9
|0
|27
|No
|-
|9/24/07
|20
|1
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|9/25/07
|3
|1
|1
|0
|3
|No
|-
|9/27/07
|3
|8
|8
|0
|24
|No
|-
|9/27/07
|20
|1
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|9/30/07
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|10/9/07
|3
|8
|8
|0
|24
|No
|-
|10/9/07
|20
|1
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|10/18/07
|3
|1
|1
|0
|3
|No
|-
|10/19/07
|20
|2
|0
|48
|40
|No
|-
|10/24/07
|20
|1
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|10/25/07
|3
|1
|1
|0
|3
|No
|-
|10/29/07
|3
|4
|4
|0
|12
|No
|-
|10/29/07
|20
|1
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|11/3/07
|3
|9
|9
|0
|27
|No
|-
|11/3/07
|20
|1
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|11/10/07
|3
|7
|7
|0
|21
|No
|-
|11/10/07
|10
|3
|0
|36
|30
|No
|-
|11/18/07
|3
|9
|9
|0
|27
|No
|-
|11/18/07
|20
|1
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|11/29/07
|3
|6
|6
|0
|18
|No
|-
|11/29/07
|20
|3
|0
|72
|60
|No
|-
|12/11/07
|3
|7
|7
|0
|21
|No
|-
|12/11/07
|10
|2
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|12/11/07
|20
|1
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|12/17/07
|3
|7
|7
|0
|21
|No
|-
|12/17/07
|20
|2
|0
|48
|40
|No
|-
|1/4/08
|3
|5
|5
|0
|15
|No
|-
|1/4/08
|20
|4
|0
|96
|80
|No
|-
|1/4/08
|10
|1
|0
|12
|10
|No
|-
|1/19/08
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|1/27/08
|10
|9
|0
|108
|90
|No
|-
|1/27/08
|20
|1
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|2/16/08
|3
|3
|3
|0
|9
|No
|-
|2/16/08
|10
|7
|0
|84
|70
|No
|-
|3/1/08
|3
|5
|5
|0
|15
|No
|-
|3/1/08
|10
|2
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|3/1/08
|20
|2
|0
|48
|40
|No
|-
|3/14/08
|3
|4
|4
|0
|12
|No
|-
|3/14/08
|10
|5
|0
|60
|50
|No
|-
|3/14/08
|20
|1
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|3/20/08
|3
|9
|9
|0
|27
|No
|-
|3/20/08
|20
|1
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|4/9/08
|10
|10
|0
|120
|100
|No
|-
|4/23/08
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|4/26/08
|3
|10
|10
|0
|30
|No
|-
|4/27/08
|3
|2
|2
|0
|6
|No
|-
|4/27/08
|10
|7
|0
|84
|70
|No
|-
|4/27/08
|20
|1
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|5/8/08
|3
|5
|5
|0
|15
|No
|-
|5/8/08
|10
|4
|0
|48
|40
|No
|-
|5/8/08
|20
|1
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|5/12/08
|3
|1
|1
|0
|3
|No
|-
|5/12/08
|10
|1
|0
|12
|10
|No
|-
|5/21/08
|3
|1
|1
|0
|3
|No
|-
|5/21/08
|10
|4
|0
|48
|40
|No
|-
|5/30/08
|3
|6
|6
|0
|18
|No
|-
|5/30/08
|10
|5
|0
|60
|50
|No
|-
|6/10/08
|3
|4
|4
|0
|12
|No
|-
|6/12/08
|10
|3
|0
|36
|30
|No
|-
|6/25/08
|10
|4
|0
|48
|40
|No
|-
|6/25/08
|10
|0
|0
|0
|40
|Yes
|-
|6/25/08
|3
|4
|4
|0
|12
|No
|-
|7/1/08
|20
|2
|0
|48
|40
|No
|-
|7/13/08
|10
|4
|0
|48
|40
|No
|-
|7/15/08
|3
|3
|3
|0
|9
|No
|-
|7/24/08
|10
|4
|0
|48
|40
|No
|-
|8/7/08
|3
|2
|2
|0
|6
|No
|-
|8/7/08
|10
|2
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|9/4/08
|3
|4
|4
|0
|12
|No
|-
|9/4/08
|10
|2
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|9/13/08
|3
|1
|1
|0
|3
|No
|-
|9/14/08
|3
|1
|1
|0
|3
|No
|-
|9/20/08
|3
|1
|1
|0
|3
|No
|-
|10/14/08
|25
|1
|0
|36
|25
|No
|-
|10/15/08
|25
|1
|0
|36
|25
|No
|-
|10/15/08
|3
|8
|8
|0
|24
|No
|-
|10/18/08
|25
|1
|0
|36
|25
|No
|-
|10/21/08
|25
|1
|0
|36
|25
|No
|-
|10/21/08
|10
|5
|0
|60
|50
|No
|-
|10/23/08
|25
|2
|0
|72
|50
|No
|-
|10/28/08
|25
|3
|0
|108
|75
|No
|-
|11/21/08
|20
|1
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|11/21/08
|10
|2
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|11/21/08
|3
|2
|2
|0
|6
|No
|-
|12/7/08
|10
|3
|0
|36
|30
|No
|-
|12/19/08
|10
|4
|0
|48
|40
|No
|-
|12/19/08
|3
|1
|1
|0
|3
|No
|-
|1/7/09
|10
|7
|0
|84
|70
|No
|-
|1/7/09
|3
|2
|2
|0
|6
|No
|-
|2/18/09
|10
|6
|0
|72
|60
|No
|-
|2/18/09
|3
|7
|7
|0
|21
|No
|-
|3/24/09
|3
|5
|5
|0
|15
|No
|-
|3/24/09
|10
|10
|0
|120
|100
|No
|-
|4/17/09
|3
|6
|6
|0
|18
|No
|-
|4/17/09
|10
|5
|0
|60
|50
|No
|-
|5/11/09
|3
|7
|7
|0
|21
|No
|-
|5/11/09
|10
|4
|0
|48
|40
|No
|-
|5/19/09
|3
|7
|7
|0
|21
|No
|-
|5/27/09
|3
|2
|2
|0
|6
|No
|-
|5/27/09
|10
|4
|0
|48
|40
|No
|-
|6/4/09
|3
|1
|1
|0
|3
|No
|-
|6/4/09
|10
|6
|0
|72
|60
|No
|-
|6/15/09
|3
|7
|7
|0
|21
|No
|-
|6/15/09
|20
|2
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|6/30/09
|3
|7
|7
|0
|21
|No
|-
|6/30/09
|20
|1
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|6/30/09
|10
|6
|0
|72
|60
|No
|-
|7/8/09
|3
|2
|2
|0
|6
|No
|-
|7/8/09
|20
|1
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|7/8/09
|10
|4
|0
|48
|40
|No
|-
|8/15/09
|20
|5
|0
|120
|100
|No
|-
|8/15/09
|3
|6
|6
|0
|18
|No
|-
|8/19/09
|10
|7
|0
|84
|70
|No
|-
|8/22/09
|10
|1
|0
|12
|10
|No
|-
|8/24/09
|10
|1
|0
|12
|10
|No
|-
|8/24/09
|3
|1
|1
|0
|3
|No
|-
|9/4/09
|10
|7
|0
|84
|70
|No
|-
|9/4/09
|20
|1
|0
|24
|20
|No
|-
|Total:
|n/a
|n/a
|905 Bottles
|3624 Cans
|5503 Points
|n/a
|}

==Chris's rewards==

In return for his prodigious consumption of caramel coloring and high fructose corn syrup, Chris has picked up a wide variety of prizes through the My Coke Rewards program. His choices include $50 in gift certificates for Simon Malls (Simon is the real estate company that owns and operates [[Charlottesville Fashion Square]]), five free game and movie rentals from Blockbuster Video, and 40 free song downloads and one free album download from [[List of Chris's Rhapsody.com downloads|Rhapsody.com]]. This possibly goes some way to explaining why he downloads all his music legally, instead of treating copyright with his usual contempt.

He also acquired a "30+ Minute Downloadable Motivational Workout Music Mix," which he will never use in his life. Period.

{|class="wikitable"
!Prize
!Points
!Date
|-
|$25 SonyStyle Gift Card
|500
|4/29/07
|-
|One Game Rental at BLOCKBUSTER
|80
|5/7/07
|-
|One Game Rental at BLOCKBUSTER
|80
|6/12/07
|-
|DVD set of Rubi Novela
|345
|7/6/07
|-
|One 20 ounce Coca-Cola Product
|0
|7/6/07
|-
|One Movie Rental at BLOCKBUSTER
|45
|8/25/07
|-
|$25.00 Simon Giftaccount (SM)
|625
|8/20/07
|-
|$25.00 Simon Giftaccount (SM)
|625
|11/3/07
|-
|$5 Off Season 6 of "24" on DVD
|0
|11/3/07
|-
|One Game Rental at BLOCKBUSTER
|80
|3/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Full Album Download from Rhapsody.com
|225
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/21/08
|-
|Universal Grad Bash 2008 Battle of the Bands
|0
|5/21/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/30/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|5/31/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|6/12/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|6/25/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|6/25/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|6/25/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|7/1/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|7/15/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|7/15/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|33
|7/24/08
|-
|Single-Song Download from Rhapsody.com
|43
|8/7/08
|-
|$1 Rhapsody MP3 Store Credit
|43
|11/21/08
|-
|$1 Rhapsody MP3 Store Credit
|43
|11/21/08
|-
|$10 Rhapsody MP3 Store Credit
|440
|1/7/09
|-
|$1 Rhapsody MP3 Store Credit
|43
|2/19/09
|-
|$1 Rhapsody MP3 Store Credit
|43
|3/24/09
|-
|$1 Rhapsody MP3 Store Credit
|43
|3/24/09
|-
|$1 @ Rhapsody MP3 Store
|6
|4/17/09
|-
|$1 Rhapsody MP3 Store Credit
|43
|4/17/09
|-
|$1 Rhapsody MP3 Store Credit
|43
|5/11/09
|-
|$1 Rhapsody MP3 Store Credit
|43
|5/19/09
|-
|Don't Quit Music (30+ minute Downloadable Motivational Workout Music Mix)
|10
|6/4/09
|-
|$1 Rhapsody MP3 Store Credit
|43
|6/15/09
|-
|$1 Rhapsody MP3 Store Credit
|43
|6/30/09
|-
|$1 Rhapsody MP3 Store Credit
|43
|7/24/09
|-
|$1 Rhapsody MP3 Store Credit
|43
|7/24/09
|-
|Rhapsody Music Every Minute
|1
|8/15/09
|-
|$1 Rhapsody MP3 Store Credit
|43
|8/24/09
|-
|$1 Rhapsody MP3 Store Credit
|43
|8/24/09
|}

==See also==
*[[CWC Cola]]

==External links==
* [http://www.mycokerewards.com The official My Coke Rewards website]
* http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?n2bjtmemyyj
* http://www.mediafire.com/?m21jzkmmkvt

{{Lists}}

[[Category:Websites]]

November 2011

2011-11-26T13:50:08Z

Croatchu:

'''November 2011''' will see more fallout from the [[28 October 2011]] incident.

==Events==
*1 November: [[Michael Snyder]] files a civil suit against both [[Chris]] and [[Barb]] 4 days after [[28 October 2011|the GAMe PLACe incident]].
*4 November: Chris releases photographs of [[Michael Snyder]] from his latest visit to [[the GAMe PLACe]].
*7 November - Chris goes to court to answer charges of trespass, misdemeanor assault and failure to stop at the scene of an accident. None of the charges are dropped.
*12 November - The [[SPARKLE like you mean it: ROBEE'S BALLAD|debut album]] of [[Robee Sonee and the Tomgirls]], Chris's latest fictional band, is leaked.
*19 November - A [[Dating Ad.mp4|voice recording]] of a personal dating ad that Chris made [[2008|3 years ago]] is finally discovered.
*22 November - Two [[prank calls]] are released by [[TheCWCvilleLibrary]], who received them from an [[Trolls|anonymous]] source. Ironically, one of the calls (made with a Chris soundboard) was made to the GAMe PLACe on 27 October 2011.

{{Timeline}}

November 2011

2011-11-24T01:37:36Z

Croatchu: The prank calls (or at least one of them) precede the incident

'''November 2011''' will see more fallout from the [[28 October 2011]] incident.

==Events==
*1 November: [[Michael Snyder]] files a civil suit against both [[Chris]] and [[Barb]] 4 days after [[28 October 2011|the GAMe PLACe incident]].
*4 November: Chris releases photographs of [[Michael Snyder]] from his latest visit to [[the GAMe PLACe]].
*7 November - Chris goes to court to answer charges of trespass, misdemeanor assault and failure to stop at the scene of an accident. None of the charges are dropped.
*12 November - The [[SPARKLE like you mean it: ROBEE'S BALLAD|debut album]] of [[Robee Sonee and the Tomgirls]], Chris's latest fictional band, is leaked.
*22 November - Two [[prank calls]] are released by [[TheCWCvilleLibrary]], who received them from an [[Trolls|anonymous]] source. Ironically, one of the calls (made with a Chris soundboard) was made to the GAMe PLACe on 27 October 2011.

{{Timeline}}

CWCALICIOUS

2011-11-14T13:01:06Z

Croatchu:

'''CWCALICIOUS''' is the 13th track from ''[[SPARKLE like you mean it: ROBEE'S BALLAD]]'' by [[Robee Sonee and the Tomgirls]]. It is a cover of the song [[Wikipedia:Fergalicious|Fergalicious]] by [[Wikipedia:Fergie (singer)|Fergie]]. Please note the spelling errors.


== Audio ==
{{Infobox/video
| name = "CWCALICIOUS"
| video = {{#ev:youtube|sYKXeseGjJk}}
| stardate = [[November 2011]]
| subject = [[Tomgirl]]
| style =
| saga =
| shirt =
| previous = [[Boys Boys Boys v2]]
| next = [[Thriller]]
}}

=== Lyrics ===

Listen up y'all cause this is it 
[[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|The beat that I'm bangin']] is delicious 

Fergalicious definition 
Make them girls go loco 
They want my treasure 
So they get their pleasures from [[Tomgirl Pictures|my photo]] 

You can see me, you can't squeeze me 
I ain't easy, I ain't sleazy 
I got reasons why I tease 'em 
[[Sweetheart|Girls]] just come and go like seasons 

Fergalicious 
So del...[''loses track''] 
But I ain't [[For Julie's Eyes Only|promiscuous]] 
And if you was suspicious 
All that [[Chris and censorship|BEEP]] is fictitious 

[[CWC's Message for Ivy|I blow kisses]] 
That puts them girls on rock, rock 
And they be linin' down the block 
Just to watch [[Nudes|what I got]] 
 

So delicious 
It's hot, hot 
So delicious 
I put them girls on rock, rock 
So delicious 
They want a taste of what I got 
I'm Fergalicious 
[[Semen|T-t-tasty, tasty]] 

Fergalicious def- 
Fergalicious def- 
Fergalicious def- 

Fergalicious definition 
Make them girls go crazy 
They always claim they know me 
Comin' to me call me [''stutters''] Stacy 

I'm the F to the E, to the G, the I, to the E 
And can't no other girls put it down like me 

I'm Fergalicious 
So delicious 
My body stay vicious 
[[Pokemon|I be up in the gym]] 
[[Guitar Hero|Just]] [[30 Push-Ups|workin']] [[A Workout|on]] [[100 2278|my]] [[11042009 51 50|fitness]] 

She's my witness 
I put yo' girl on rock on rock 
And he be linin' down the block 
Just to watch what I got 

So delicious 
It's hot, hot, hot 
So delicious 
I put them girls on rock 
So delicious 
They want a taste of what I got 
I'm Fergalicious 
Hold hold hold hold hold up, check it out 

Baby, baby, baby 
If you really want me 
Honey, get some [[Stress|patience]] 
Maybe then you'll get a taste 

Of my tasty, tasty 
I'll be laced with lacey 
It's so tasty, tasty 
It'll make you crazy 

T, to the-, to the S-T-E-Y, girl you're tasty 
T, to the A, to the S-T-E-E, girl you so tasty 
D, to the E, to the double I-C-I-E-U-S 
To the D, to the E, to the, to the, to the 
Hit it Fergie! 

[''The following verses are comprised of [[Speech impediment|mumbles and word mash]], which is saying a lot''] 
All the time I turn around brothas gather round 
Always lookin' at me up and down, lookin' at my 
I just wanna say it now I ain't tryin? to round up drama 
Little mama I don't wanna take your girl 

And I know I'm comin' off just a little bit conceited 
And I keep on repeatin' how the girl wanna eat it 
But I'm tryin' to tell, that I can't be treated like clientele 

Cause they say she delicious 
But I ain't promiscuous 
And if you was suspicious 
All that BEEP is fictitious 

I blow kisses 
That puts them girls on rock 
And they be linin' down the block 
Just to watch what I got 

My body stay vicious 
I be up in the gym 
Just workin' on my fitness 
She's my witness 

I put yo' girl on rock 
And he be linin' down the block
Just to watch what I got 

So delicious 
AY AY AY AY AY AY AY AY AYYA AY AY AY AY
Fergalicious T-T-Tasty

So delicious 
AY AY AY AY AY AY (rapid fire AY AY AY again) 
I'm Fergalicious, t-t-taaaaahahah 

T, to the A, to the S-T-E-Y, girl you tasty 
T, to the A, to the S-T-E-Y, girl you tasty 
T, to the E, to the S-T-E-Y, girl you tasty 
T, to the A, to the, to the, to the, to the 

To the D, to the E, to the L-I-C-I-O-U-S 
To the D, to the E, to the L-I-C-I-O-U-S 
To the ah D, to the E, to the L-I-C-I-O-U-S 
To the D, to the E, to the, to the, to the, to the 

T, to the A, to the S-T-E-Y, girl you tasty 
T, to the A, to the S-T-E-Y, girl you tasty 
T, to the A, to the S-T-E-Y, girl you tasty 
T, to the A, to the, to the, to the, to the Quarto,Tres,Dos,d' Uno 

To the D, to the E, to the L-I-C-I-O-U-S 
To the D, to the E, to the L-I-C-I-O-U-S 
To the D, to the E, to the L-I-C-I-O-U-S 
To the D, to the E, to the, to the, to the, to the, to the 

{{The Tomgirls}}
[[Category:SPARKLE like you mean it: ROBEE'S BALLAD]]
[[Category:Yo! CWC Raps]]

28 October 2011

2011-11-13T20:41:49Z

Croatchu:

{{recent}}
On '''28 October 2011''' - a date which will live in infamy - the [[GAMe PLACe]] was suddenly and deliberately attacked by forces of the City of [[CWCville]].

On that fateful Friday evening, around 5:20 p.m.<ref>Based on metadata from Chris's photos</ref>, [[Chris]] and [[Barbara]] visited the GAMe PLACe and had an altercation with its [[manajerk|manager]], [[Michael Snyder]]. Chris took several photos of Michael on that day, and uploaded them to the [[CWCki]] in November. A bit of a delay, but it turns out, he and Barb had been [[jerkop|arrested]] and jailed for various offenses (trespassing, assault, and hit & run). Now both have been charged with a Class 5 Felony, which implies "a '''term of imprisonment of not less than one year''' nor more than 10 years, and ... a fine of not more than $2,500."<ref>http://leg1.state.va.us/000/cod/18.2-10.HTM</ref>

Both Chris and Barb were bonded out on 29 October<ref>https://www.vinelink.com/vinelink/detailsAction.do?siteId=47000&agency=228&id=323013&searchType=offender</ref><ref>https://www.vinelink.com/vinelink/detailsAction.do?siteId=47000&agency=228&id=125674&searchType=offender</ref>, with Chris's initial hearing being a week later than Barb's - possibly owing to the extra charge against him. It may also allow for additional information to be gathered about on his record of dealings with Michael Snyder and the GAMe PLACe, and also to consider any [[autism|medical grounds]] that may affect the outcome of any court proceedings against Chris. The Chandlers will be represented in court by [[Wikipedia:Robert B. Bell|Rob Bell]], a Republican member of the Virginia House of Delegates.

This is the first major event that has come to light since the death of [[Bob]] on 6 [[September 2011]].

== The charges ==
Below are the charges brought against both Barbara and Chris, along with details and court dates based on the details from the [http://epwsgdp1.courts.state.va.us/gdcourts/captchaVerification.do?landing=landing General District Court Online Case Information System]. At present we do not have a full account of what happened during the incident and under what circumstances the charges were brought against the pair. However, based on at least one previous incident in [[June 2010]], we can assume a rough outline of events.

===Barbara's===
* '''FAIL STOP ACCIDENT > $1000 FEL''' (§ 46.2-894. Duty of driver to stop, etc., in event of accident involving injury or death or damage to attended property; penalty.<ref name="a">http://leg1.state.va.us/cgi-bin/legp504.exe?000+cod+46.2-894</ref>)
** Class 5 Felony charge - Failing to stop after an accident where the damage exceeds $1,000 in value, thought to be vehicular damage on the grounds of The GAMe PLACe parking lot.
* '''ASSLT: ON LAW ENF/DOC PERSON''' (§ 18.2-57. Assault and battery.<ref name="b">http://leg1.state.va.us/cgi-bin/legp504.exe?000+cod+18.2-57</ref>)
** Class 6 Felony charge - Assaulting a law enforcement official. It's likely that this occurred when Barb attempted to prevent the police from arresting Chris.

==== Court dates ====
* 31 October 2011 - Appeared in court to be formally charged.
* 15 December 2011 - Due to appear in court again, possibly for the hearing.

===Chris's===
* '''FAIL STOP ACCIDENT > $1000 FEL''' (§ 46.2-894. Duty of driver to stop, etc., in event of accident involving injury or death or damage to attended property; penalty.<ref name="a" />)
** Class 5 Felony charge - Failing to stop after an accident where the damage exceeds $1,000 in value, thought to be vehicular damage on the grounds of The GAMe PLACe parking lot.
* '''ASSAULT: (MISDEMEANOR)''' (§ 18.2-57. Assault and battery.<ref name="b" />)
** Class 1 Misdemeanor charge - Attempted or actual assault against another person, perhaps [[Michael Snyder|Snyder]].
* '''TRESPASS AFTER FORBIDDEN''' (§ 18.2-119. Trespass after having been forbidden to do so; penalties.<ref>http://leg1.state.va.us/cgi-bin/legp504.exe?000+cod+18.2-119</ref>)
** Class 1 Misdemeanor charge - Trespassing on land or within an area from which the offender is forbidden, no doubt due to setting foot in The GAMe PLACe.

==== Court dates ====
* 7 November 2011 - Appeared in court to be formally charged.
* 15 December 2011 - Due to appear in court again, at the same time Barb is.

== Civil suit ==
Michael Snyder also filled a civil suit against both Chris and Barb on November 1, 2011, 4 days after the incident.
The reason for the lawsuit and what damages are being sought is currently unknown besides that it is related to the October 28th event.

== Aftermath ==
* On 4 November, soon after being bailed out of jail, Chris uploaded the pictures he took of Michael Snyder on the 28th to the CWCki, plastering them on the front page as well as Michael's own article, with Chris presumably doing it as a response to the events at The GAMe PLACe.<ref>[[Special:Contributions/Christianchandler]]</ref> In the respective image descriptions, Chris claimed that Snyder molests children and taunted him for his [[obesity]].

== Photos ==
<gallery>
File:HNI 0020.JPG|Chris's photo of The GAMe PLACe; note that everyone is looking at the camera
File:HNI 0021.JPG|Chris's photograph of Michael Snyder
File:HNI 0022.JPG|Chris's second photograph of Michael Snyder
File:28 Oct 2011 Barb1.png|Barb's failure to stop felony charge
File:28 Oct 2011 Barb2.png|Barb's felony assault on a police officer charge
File:28 Oct 2011 Chris1.png|Chris's failure to stop felony charge
File:28 Oct 2011 Chris2.png|Chris's misdemeanor assault charge
File:28 Oct 2011 Chris3.png|Chris's trespass misdemeanor charge
File:Christian_Chandler_Civil_Suit.png|Michael Snyder's civil suit against Chris
File:Barbara_Chandler_Civil_Suit.png|Michael Snyder's civil suit against Barbara
</gallery>

==Fan Art ==
<gallery>
File:Chris mug.jpg|Artist's depiction of Chris's mugshot.
File:Chris joker.jpg| Why so serious?
File:TheJoker.png|Oh dear...
File:Chris court sketch.png| An artist provides a theoretical court sketch.
</gallery>

==References==
<references />

== See also ==
*[[6 June 2010]]
*[[Chris and the Law]]

[[Category:Events]]

CWCALICIOUS

2011-11-13T20:40:19Z

Croatchu: Some piping to make it un-boring

'''CWCALICIOUS''' is the 13th track from ''[[SPARKLE like you mean it: ROBEE'S BALLAD]]'' by [[Robee Sonee and the Tomgirls]]. It is a cover of the song [[Wikipedia:Fergalicious|Fergalicious]] by [[Wikipedia:Fergie (singer)|Fergie]]. Please note the spelling errors.


== Audio ==
{{Infobox/video
| name = "CWCALICIOUS"
| video = {{#ev:youtube|sYKXeseGjJk}}
| stardate = [[November 2011]]
| subject = [[Tomgirl]]
| style =
| saga =
| shirt =
| previous = [[Boys Boys Boys v2]]
| next = [[Thriller]]
}}

=== Lyrics ===

Listen up y'all cause this is it 
[[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|The beat that I'm bangin']] is delicious 

Fergalicious definition 
Make them girls go loco 
They want my treasure 
So they get their pleasures from [[Tomgirl Pictures|my photo]] 

You can see me, you can't squeeze me 
I ain't easy, I ain't sleazy 
I got reasons why I tease 'em 
[[Sweetheart|Girls]] just come and go like seasons 

Fergalicious 
So del...(loses track) 
But I ain't [[For Julie's Eyes Only|promiscuous]] 
And if you was suspicious 
All that [[Chris and censorship|BEEP]] is fictitious 

[[CWC's Message for Ivy|I blow kisses]] 
That puts them girls on rock, rock 
And they be linin' down the block 
Just to watch [[Nudes|what I got]] 
 

So delicious 
It's hot, hot 
So delicious 
I put them girls on rock, rock 
So delicious 
They want a taste of what I got 
I'm Fergalicious 
[[Semen|T-t-tasty, tasty]] 

Fergalicious def- 
Fergalicious def- 
Fergalicious def- 

Fergalicious definition 
Make them girls go crazy 
They always claim they know me 
Comin' to me call me (stutters) Stacy 

I'm the F to the E, to the G, the I, to the E 
And can't no other girls put it down like me 

I'm Fergalicious 
So delicious 
My body stay vicious 
[[Pokemon|I be up in the gym]] 
[[Guitar Hero|Just]] [[30 Push-Ups|workin']] [[A Workout|on]] [[100 2278|my]] [[11042009 51 50|fitness]] 

She's my witness 
I put yo' girl on rock on rock 
And he be linin' down the block 
Just to watch what I got 

So delicious 
It's hot, hot, hot 
So delicious 
I put them girls on rock 
So delicious 
They want a taste of what I got 
I'm Fergalicious 
Hold hold hold hold hold up, check it out 

Baby, baby, baby 
If you really want me 
Honey, get some [[Stress|patience]] 
Maybe then you'll get a taste 

Of my tasty, tasty 
I'll be laced with lacey 
It's so tasty, tasty 
It'll make you crazy 

T, to the-, to the S-T-E-Y, girl you're tasty 
T, to the A, to the S-T-E-E, girl you so tasty 
D, to the E, to the double I-C-I-E-U-S 
To the D, to the E, to the, to the, to the 
Hit it Fergie! 

(The following verses are comprised of [[Speech impediment|mumbles and word mash]], which is saying a lot) 
All the time I turn around brothas gather round 
Always lookin' at me up and down, lookin' at my 
I just wanna say it now I ain't tryin? to round up drama 
Little mama I don't wanna take your girl 

And I know I'm comin' off just a little bit conceited 
And I keep on repeatin' how the girl wanna eat it 
But I'm tryin' to tell, that I can't be treated like clientele 

Cause they say she delicious 
But I ain't promiscuous 
And if you was suspicious 
All that BEEP is fictitious 

I blow kisses 
That puts them girls on rock 
And they be linin' down the block 
Just to watch what I got 

My body stay vicious 
I be up in the gym 
Just workin' on my fitness 
She's my witness 

I put yo' girl on rock 
And he be linin' down the block
Just to watch what I got 

So delicious 
AY AY AY AY AY AY AY AY AYYA AY AY AY AY
Fergalicious T-T-Tasty

So delicious 
AY AY AY AY AY AY (rapid fire AY AY AY again) 
I'm Fergalicious, t-t-taaaaahahah 

T, to the A, to the S-T-E-Y, girl you tasty 
T, to the A, to the S-T-E-Y, girl you tasty 
T, to the E, to the S-T-E-Y, girl you tasty 
T, to the A, to the, to the, to the, to the 

To the D, to the E, to the L-I-C-I-O-U-S 
To the D, to the E, to the L-I-C-I-O-U-S 
To the ah D, to the E, to the L-I-C-I-O-U-S 
To the D, to the E, to the, to the, to the, to the 

T, to the A, to the S-T-E-Y, girl you tasty 
T, to the A, to the S-T-E-Y, girl you tasty 
T, to the A, to the S-T-E-Y, girl you tasty 
T, to the A, to the, to the, to the, to the Quarto,Tres,Dos,d' Uno 

To the D, to the E, to the L-I-C-I-O-U-S 
To the D, to the E, to the L-I-C-I-O-U-S 
To the D, to the E, to the L-I-C-I-O-U-S 
To the D, to the E, to the, to the, to the, to the, to the 

[[Category:SPARKLE like you mean it: ROBEE'S BALLAD]]
[[Category:Yo! CWC Raps]]

User:Croatchu

2011-11-13T20:10:12Z

Croatchu:

User:Croatchu

2011-11-13T15:04:58Z

Croatchu:

28 October 2011

2011-11-08T20:55:13Z

Croatchu:

{{recent}}
On '''28 October 2011''' - a date which will live in infamy - the [[GAMe PLACe]] was suddenly and deliberately attacked by forces of the City of [[CWCville]].

On that Friday evening, around 5:20 p.m.<ref>Based on metadata from Chris's photos</ref>, [[Chris]] and [[Barbara]] visited the GAMe PLACe and had an altercation with its [[manajerk|manager]], [[Michael Snyder]]. Chris took several photos of Michael on that day, and uploaded them to the [[CWCki]] in November. Why the delay? Well, as it turns out, he and Barb had been [[jerkop|arrested]] and jailed for various offences (trespassing, assault, and hit & run). Now both have been charged with a Class 5 Felony, which implies "a '''term of imprisonment of not less than one year''' nor more than 10 years, and ... a fine of not more than $2,500."<ref>http://leg1.state.va.us/000/cod/18.2-10.HTM</ref>

Both Chris and Barb were released on bail following their arrest, with Chris's initial hearing being a week later than Barb's - possibly owing to the extra charge against him. It may also allow for additional information to be gathered about on his record of dealings with Michael Snyder and the GAMe PLACe, and also to consider any [[autism|medical grounds]] that may affect the outcome of any court proceedings against Chris. Chris will be represented in court by [http://www.dklawyers.com/bio_rbell.htm Robert Bell].

This is the first major event that has come to light since the death of [[Bob]] on 6 [[September 2011]].

== The charges ==
Below are the charges brought against both Barbara and Chris, along with details and court dates based on the details from the [http://epwsgdp1.courts.state.va.us/gdcourts/captchaVerification.do?landing=landing General District Court Online Case Information System]. At present we do not have a full account of what happened during the incident and under what circumstances the charges were brought against the pair. However, based on at least one previous incident in [[June 2010]], we can assume a rough outline of events.

===Barbara's===
* '''FAIL STOP ACCIDENT > $1000 FEL''' (§ 46.2-894. Duty of driver to stop, etc., in event of accident involving injury or death or damage to attended property; penalty.<ref name="a">http://leg1.state.va.us/cgi-bin/legp504.exe?000+cod+46.2-894</ref>)
** Class 5 Felony charge - Failing to stop after an accident where the damage exceeds $1,000 in value, thought to be vehicular damage on the grounds of The GAMe PLACe parking lot.
* '''ASSLT: ON LAW ENF/DOC PERSON''' (§ 18.2-57. Assault and battery.<ref name="b">http://leg1.state.va.us/cgi-bin/legp504.exe?000+cod+18.2-57</ref>)
** Class 6 Felony charge - Assaulting a law enforcement official. It's likely that this occurred when Barb attempted to prevent the police from arresting Chris.

==== Court dates ====
* 31 October 2011 - Appeared in court to be formally charged.
* 15 December 2011 - Due to appear in court again, possibly for the hearing.

===Chris's===
* '''FAIL STOP ACCIDENT > $1000 FEL''' (§ 46.2-894. Duty of driver to stop, etc., in event of accident involving injury or death or damage to attended property; penalty.<ref name="a" />)
** Class 5 Felony charge - Failing to stop after an accident where the damage exceeds $1,000 in value, thought to be vehicular damage on the grounds of The GAMe PLACe parking lot.
* '''ASSAULT: (MISDEMEANOR)''' (§ 18.2-57. Assault and battery.<ref name="b" />)
** Class 1 Misdemeanor charge - Attempted or actual assault against another person, perhaps [[Michael Snyder|Snyder]].
* '''TRESPASS AFTER FORBIDDEN''' (§ 18.2-119. Trespass after having been forbidden to do so; penalties.<ref>http://leg1.state.va.us/cgi-bin/legp504.exe?000+cod+18.2-119</ref>)
** Class 1 Misdemeanor charge - Tresspassing on land or within an area from which the offender is forbidden, no doubt due to setting foot in The GAMe PLACe.

==== Court dates ====
* 7 November 2011 - Appeared in court to be formally charged.
* 15 December 2011 - Due to appear in court again, at the same time Barb is.

== Aftermath ==
* On 4 November, soon after being bailed out of jail, Chris uploaded the pictures he took of Michael Snyder on the 28th to the CWCki, plastering them on the front page as well as Michael's own article, with Chris presumably doing it as a response to the events at The GAMe PLACe.<ref>[[Special:Contributions/Christianchandler]]</ref> In the respective image descriptions, Chris claimed that Snyder molests children and taunted him for his [[obesity]].

== Photos ==
<gallery>
File:HNI 0020.JPG|Chris's photo of The GAMe PLACe; note that everyone is looking at the camera
File:HNI 0021.JPG|Chris's photograph of Michael Snyder
File:HNI 0022.JPG|Chris's second photograph of Michael Snyder
File:28 Oct 2011 Barb1.png|Barb's failure to stop felony charge
File:28 Oct 2011 Barb2.png|Barb's felony assault on a police officer charge
File:28 Oct 2011 Chris1.png|Chris's failure to stop felony charge
File:28 Oct 2011 Chris2.png|Chris's misdemeanor assault charge
File:28 Oct 2011 Chris3.png|Chris's trespass misdemeanor charge
</gallery>

==Fan Art ==
<gallery>
File:Chris mug.jpg|Chris' mugshot.
File:Chris joker.jpg| Why so serious?
File:TheJoker.png|Oh dear...
File:Chris court sketch.png| Artist's impression of the proceedings.
</gallery>

==References==
<references />

== See also ==
*[[6 June 2010]]
*[[Chris and the Law]]

[[Category:Events]]