CWCki - User contributions [en]

Giovanni

2012-10-18T20:31:40Z

Edrobot:

[[Image:SchuGioRetard.jpg|right|200px|thumb|Chris's best depiction of Giovanni.]]

'''Giovanni''' was the ruthless leader of [[Team Rocket]], and the main villain of the original ''[[Pokémon]] Red and Blue'' games for the [[Nintendo]] Game Boy, as well as their remakes ''Pokémon FireRed and LeafGreen'', and also appearing as a secret event exclusive boss in ''Pokémon HeartGold and SoulSilver'', as well as a World Tournament contender boss in ''Pokémon Black 2 and White 2''. Being the very first ''Pokémon'' villain, he was also prominently featured in the anime and manga adaptations. [[Chris]], naturally, saw fit to swipe the character and use him as a half baked [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'']] villain as well.

Giovanni first shows up in ''Sonichu'' during [[Sonichu 1|''Sonichu #1'']]. In this narrative, he is the adoptive father of [[Naitsirhc]], Chris's main rival, and he remains the leader of Team Rocket and the Virdian City Gym as well. Though in the games Giovanni was defeated by the player and he abandoned both the Rockets and his gym, ''Sonichu'' ignores the events of the games, establishing that Giovanni still leads Team Rocket and still maintains a "Gym/Base" in Viridian, as seen on [[:File:CWCvilleArea.jpg|Chris's map]] of [[CWCville]] and it's surrounding areas.

In his first appearance, Giovanni, Naitsirhc, [[Doctor Robotnik]] and [[Bill the Scientist]] all work together to create [[Black Sonichu]], who they then send off to kidnap [[Rosechu]] as part of their plan to lure [[Sonichu]] into a trap and capture him. However, both Sonichu and [[Sonic the Hedgehog|Sonic]] go to rescue Rosechu, leading to a fight with a robotic Sonichu duplicate called [[Metal Sonichu]], also made by Team Rocket. Note that Giovanni in the games is supposed to be a very powerful Ground-type Pokémon trainer, and in the games, Electric types like Sonichu are completely useless against Ground types. And yet Giovanni [[Chris and writing|still went out of his way to clone another Electric type]] to fight Sonichu with.

Later, Giovanni appears in [[Sonichu 3|''Sonichu #3'']] giving orders to Blake just before he begins his mission to steal the [[Legendary Master Sunstone]]. After the end of the comic Giovanni disappears from the series until [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu #7'']] in which he is part of the meeting of villains, though Blake does mention him in [[Sonichu 6|''Sonichu #6'']], stating that Naitsirhc had been disrespectful to his father since his transformation into [[Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc]].<ref>http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_6/Page_33</ref>

Giovanni reappears for the final time in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu #9'']] as a player in the war on [[CWCville]]. During the battle, he uses a [[Jerkop Punislav]] to capture Rosechu in an attempt to blackmail Sonichu into instating Naitsirhc as the new Mayor of [[CWCville]], though his cunning scheme is foiled when he is knocked out by a basketball thrown by [[Bionic the Hedgehog]]. Soon after, Naitisirhc teleports him away to safety, and he is never seen again.

Since Chris never explained what happened to Giovanni afterwards, it can be assumed that he either turned into a good guy when [[Colossal Chan]] un-brainwashed all the members of [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|PVCC]], (assuming he ever was brainwashed at all; Giovanni was a douche way before [[Mary Lee Walsh]] showed up), or else Giovanni just quit his job when PVCC fell and ran off to Mexico or something. Either that or Bionic accidentally killed him.

==References==
<references/>

==External links==
*[[Wikipedia:Giovanni (Pokémon)|Giovanni]] at [[Wikipedia]].

==See also==
*[[Doctor Robotnik]]
*[[Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc]]
*[[Black Sonichu]]
*[[Team Rocket]]
*[[Pokémon]]

{{Sonichu}}
{{CWCverse}}

[[Category:Characters]]
[[Category:Villains]]
[[Category:Things Chris has ripped off]]

File talk:And your little dog too.jpg

2011-02-24T20:07:51Z

Edrobot: Created page with "This one really captures his character perfectly. --~~~~"

This one really captures his character perfectly. --[[User:Edrobot|Edrobot]] 12:07, 24 February 2011 (PST)

Mailbag 30

2011-02-15T21:07:44Z

Edrobot: /* Sneezing spreads the gay */

__NOTOC__'''Mailbag 30''' was uploaded to the [[CWCipedia]] 31 [[December 2009]]. [[Chris]] responded to it on 1 [[January 2010]].

None of his answers were half as interesting as the fact that he decided to advertise [[My Coke Rewards|Coke]] at the top of the page, making it clear that Chris has no idea how advertising works. Highlights of this mailbag include Chris assuming nonsense about how great a father he'd be, and playing along with a [[troll]] pretending to be [[Family Guy|Meg Griffin]]. He also reveals that he is under the impression that [[homos|gayness]] can be ''caught'', and probably also ''[[sonichu_10|cured]]'', much like the common cold.

==Answered==
===ACCIDENTALLY CRACK the parental lock code===
{{Email|From: hurdygurdy@doglover.com

Dear Chris

You completely ignored my question. If children are "channel surfing" and viewing adult programming, I am assuming they have cable. Therefore it is the parents' responsibility to lock those channels. Maybe your parents were bad parents and let you watch soft porn on HBO when you were sixteen but I lock those channels from my children. My children will never unlock them because they are well behaved. Only badly behaved spoiled brats would unlock cable to watch porn.

You have still failed to explain why Sonichu and Rosechu allow their children to watch unsuitable adult shows. Like I asked - and I want a straight answer this time - who explains to a three year old what pedophilia is?

I stand by my claim that Sonichu and Rosechu are bad parents and their children should go into care until you prove how letting children watch unsuitable adult programming is beneficial for them.}}
{{EmailReply|Children are going to Channel Surf and ACCIDENTALLY land on adult content, EVEN as far as to CRACK THE Parental Lock Code on the Cable/Satellite Box and [[Mass debating#Discovery|turn on Cinemax Late Night]] at worst. Sonichu and Rosechu, as Responsible Parents, are making sure of preventing such times by lightly introducing such topics with lighter shows like [[Family Guy]] so the children will know better.}}

===Sneezing spreads the gay===
{{Email|From: [[Wikipedia:Doctor Who| Davros Skaledthal]] <fromskarowlove@aol.co.uk>

Greetings, Mister Chandler. My name is Davros Skaledthal. I am a geneticist, and I have a few questions after reading the latest issue of Sonichu. I deeply enjoy your comic, and especially the portrayal of Cwcville as a utopia. Every man should have a place to call his own, don't you agree?

First off, though, may I say how inspiring it is that you manage to make a high-quality page nearly every day. It must be incredibly taxing on you, but you seem to be coping admirably. Now, as to the questions.

1. You say that there is a 'gay gene' that can be cured. How exactly does this cure work, and which chromosome is said gay gene attached to?

2. As you have said in a previous mail post, you understand the basics of how evolution works. I'm not expecting you to discuss it at doctorate level of course, but as you know, a gene that is not used or is recessive does not transfer to the next generation. How then is the gay gene transmitted? Obviously every gay man or woman has two heterosexual parents, therefore the gay gene is not represented in either of them.

Thank you for taking the time to read this letter, and I know this is asking rather much from you, so I apologize in advance, but would you please elaborate on each of these questions with at least one full sentence? If not, I completely understand. Genius must do as genius must.

Thank you for your time, Mister Chandler.

Eagerly awaiting your response, Davros Skaledthal}}
{{EmailReply|1) It is neutrally attached to an X Chromosone. 2) It can be spread through such methods as Blood or Organ Transfusion, or there may be a slim, yet present, chance in spreading it through bodily liquid exchange such of which is sneezing.}}

===In which Chris plays along===
{{Email|From: [[Family Guy|Meg Griffin]] <meggriffin@quahog.com>

Why don't you come down to Quahog? We got, like, an animation fest coming up! You could come participate, show off your Sonichu and stuff, and, uhh... meet with me ;)

Meg Griffin.}}
{{EmailReply|LOL Obviously the person who sent this is playing off of my idea for the episode of Family Guy where I would guest star. Playing along... I will take that under great consideration, and there is a good chance. ;)}}

===In which Chris doesn't take shit under great consideration===
{{Email|From: [[Wikipedia:Jim Lee|Jim Lee]]

Hi, Chris! This is Jim Lee! I'm a professional comic artist who's worked for DC, Marvel, and Image!

Sorry about not including my email, but I'm a very busy man and I just barely have time to get in a few kind words for a budding young talent. Some of my friends have linked me comic pages you've done and I have to say you're doing extremely well for a kid your age! Most eight-year-olds don't have the focus for one comic's worth of material, let alone several hundred pages' worth! That shows a great deal of dedication!

You've got a long way to go, but don't we all? I'm 45, I've been drawing comics professionally since I was 25, and I still feel like greatness is just ahead of me. I've won the Harvey Special Award and drew the best-selling comic issue in history, but I can't let that get to me. If I ever slow down or give in to temptation to slack off, I'll squander all the goowill and fandom I've got, and I can't let that happen. With a couple more decades under your belt, you can stand alongside the greats with pride.

Just a few tips: 1) Get used to drawing your own characters, not just Sonic in different colors. It's nice to draw for comics you love, but you've got to show you can create your own characters too. 2) Don't just imitate your favorite artists' style, try and find your own. 3) Draw from life, every day; draw every day, period! Last, don't forget to look up some really good book on how-to-draw; I recommend "Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain," "Drawing Comics the Marvel Way!", and "Making Comics" by Scott McCloud. Those are great books and they'll teach you a lot about how the pros do it.

Keep reaching for the dream, Chris!

--Jim Lee}}
{{EmailReply|Thank you, Jim. I will take all that under great consideration.}}

===Chris quit guzzling cum===
{{Email|From: adam roa <adamroa@hotmail.com>
Hello Christian.

I have two questions. Firstly, I appreciate the level of detail and emotion you bring to the action scenes in the Sonichu comic. From panel to panel it's always a thrill-ride and I can barely contain myself as a reader. When I think back at how many memorable and exhilarating fight scenes have taken place over the years, I am overwhelmed and awe-struck. Such brilliant action, such incredible pacing, such sublime storytelling. So my first question is this: Which fight scene is your personal favorite? I must confess, I most enjoy the battle in issue 5... "*Lock-On* *Fire Blast + Flamethrower* Yikes! Sweet! Pffft... What the flame happened?"

And my second question is, do you still drink your own [[semen]]?

Thanks for keeping on,

Adam}}
{{EmailReply|Firstly, thank you for your support. And second, I do not.}}

===FUCK YEAH BILL===
{{Email|From: [[Bill The Scientist]] <billthescientist@hotmail.co.uk>
Hey CWC,

Bill the Scientist here,as well as the [[Boulder Dropping Whale]] and [[Yawning Squirtle]].

We have legions of fans and we feel that we should have our own series of comics, or if not, at least we should feature more in the Sonichu comics. Ask your fanbase, we're the most popular characters!

We hope you consider this suggestion,
Sincerely,
Bill the Scientist}}
{{EmailReply|No Comment.}}

==Rejected Mailbag==
===Dr. Dre's dead, he's locked in my basement===
{{Email|From: [[Wikipedia:Stan (song)|Stan]] 'Sonichu's Biggest Gay Fan' [[Wikipedia:The Marshall Mathers LP|Mathers]] <myteasgonecold@didomail.com>

Dear Chris,

I wrote but you still ain't callin! I left my cell, my pager, and my home phone at the bottom. I sent two letters back in autumn, you must not have got 'em... There probably was a problem with the hosting provider or something? Sometimes I type addresses too sloppy when I post 'em...

But anyways; fuck it, what's been up? Man, do you still "hate" us homos? My boyfriend wants us to adopt a kid, I'm about to be a gay father! If we adopt a daughter, guess what I'ma call her? I'ma name her Rosey!

I read about your fan Ryan Cash, I'm sorry. I had a gay friend kill himself over some dude who didn't want him...

I know you probably hear this every day, but I'm your Biggest Gay Fan! I even watched that hilarious rap that you did for Parappa. I got a room full of home-made posters with your drawings, man. I like the shit you did with LBP, too, that shit was phat!

Anyways, I hope you get this man, hit me back, just to chat, truly yours, your Biggest Gay Fan,

This is Stan.}}
{{EmailReply|Give It Up, JackAss; '''I Am Straight; Vaginas and Boobies Give Me MY ERECTIONS; You Damn Homos have NO CHANCE with me EVER. As for your question, you do what you want.}}

===In which Chris rejects excellent advice for the Nth time.===
{{Email|From: Jacob N. <jacob_n333@yahoo.com>

Good day, Chris!

"You are asking me to take Wild's girlfriend and Sweetheart away from him. Do not be such a monster." I'm afraid that he's in the right, Chris. You're experiencing what many comic companies suffer--what you might call "rights syndrome." When you use someone else's character, they still have the rights to that character, and what they say, goes. If you make any permanent changes to the character, you must get permission, and if the rights holder wants you to kill off or retire that character, you must.

This is why "shared universes" are so difficult to manage. Because [[Evan|Evang-y]] created [[Simonchu]], he has the right to withdraw him from the setting. Seeing as how you also changed Simonchu's gender without permission, that's already a strike against you. You should fulfill your obligation as writer and creator and listen to Evang-y. This happens all the time. There's no easy fix, either. You should also be thankful that Evang-y has allowed you to keep Simonchu/"Simonla's" previous appearances, because otherwise you would have to redraw and rewrite those comics to exclude Simonla if he just wanted her retconned out!

As for Wild losing his "sweetheart," don't look at it as him "losing a sweetheart," but you gaining a whole metric ton of storytelling opportunities! Hardship and difficulty is the backbone of storytelling. [[Sonichu 10|You could devote an entire issue to the story of Simonla's final battles and death,]] [[Sonichu 10#The_Final_Countdown|then whole issues afterward about the aftermath of the event, especially Wild's reaction.]] The Sonichu comics are lacking in any sort of pathos. Comic-Chris doesn't seem to care a bit about his various sweethearts being killed or leaving, the entire team has forgotten about Crystal, and even Blake being raped by Silvana has been glossed over. ([[Lovely Weather|Having sex with someone under false pretenses, e.g. posing as someone they love even though they're not, is most definitely a rape]].) Wild's true love being killed isn't something you can just gloss over. It will allow for all kinds of character growth and change--storytelling gold! Don't think of it as being "a monster" to Wild, think of it as tough love to make him better as a character.

I like my characters too, but it's not entertaining at all if the only changes that happen to them are for the better. Every character is defined as much, if not more, by loss than by gain, by their weaknesses as much as their strengths. If Peter Parker hadn't used his superhuman talents for petty gain, his uncle wouldn't have died; it's his grief over his uncle's death and shame over his selfishness that motivates him into becoming one of the greatest superheroes of all time, Spider-Man. It's his constant struggle between selfish gain and the greater good that makes him so entertaining, so fascinating, so well-rounded a character. When people try to make him less complex and more happy, as with the One More Day fiasco, it backfires dreadfully. You shouldn't be afraid to put your characters through the wringer... and in this case, you don't really have a choice, do you?

Good day to you, Chris.

--Jacob Nathaniel Lights-in-the-Sky of the Cherokee Nation}}
{{EmailReply|I will continue to do my work as I see fit.}}

===Chris is rubber, you are glue===
{{Email|From: Sean Watley <seanawatley@gmail.com>
Chris,

What's it like not having a conscience? It's pretty obvious that you're [[Chris and remorse|incapable of feeling guilt or remorse]] or even empathizing with other people. You drew pornography of your best friend, published it on the internet to prove some stupid point or affirm your manliness, and you only felt bad because Megan Schroeder stopped talking to you afterwards. You only befriend women because you want to have sex with them (some people would call this "nice guy" syndrome, but I think that it speaks to something much darker). And it's quite evident you're more interested in finding a woman to mooch off of when your parents die than entering into a relationship out of love. You're incapable of love because you only love yourself.

For somebody with "autism" you sure don't know a lot about it. I mean, you get basic facts about the disorder wrong, and become infuriated when people try to correct you. For starters, "High-functioning autism" isn't a formal diagnosis, and Asperger's Syndrome and autism are on the same spectrum. I think you found out about autism sometime in your teens and started using it as an excuse for your immaturity, lack of empathy, selfishness and disturbed behavior, and took the scam further in adulthood by getting disability money out of it. People with autism recognize they have limitations and get help to overcome or work around those limitations. Despite their autism they put forth effort to survive in a world they do not understand.

Autistic people don't run over small animals repeatedly and call it "the highlight of their day." Autistic people don't try to impersonate a woman's boyfriend and lure that woman to their home so they can rape them. Autistic people don't go around saying they want to force sex on their pastoral counselor. Autistic people don't steal their elderly parents' credit cards to finance their video game addiction. Autistic people don't commit fraud by purchasing Guitar Hero track packs from stores, using the codes to download the content, and then returning them for a refund or selling them on eBay, which is fraud. And they certainly don't brag about it in YouTube videos. Where did that big TV in your room come from, Chris? Did you steal that, too?

You constantly talk about murder and death in your videos. You fired up the video camera on Christmas Day to record more death threats. You suggest that people kill themselves because you don't like them. You sing along to Insane Clown Posse, (which is disturbing since you're almost 30) a group that makes light out of gruesome murder. You gave a "shout out" to the Columbine killers. And don't pretend you don't know who they are, you were enrolled in high school at the time of the massacre and there's no way you couldn't have heard about it, no matter how sheltered you were. And these are things you've done over the past few weeks.

The whole "Sonichu" thing and you acting like a bumbling, ignorant manchild is just an act, right? No 27-year-old would wear a cartoon medallion out in public and dress up like a mentally retarded person and film themselves playing house with Legos. This is an obvious charade: faking autism as an excuse for your horrific behavior and for disability money so you can sit in a room full of toys and play video games all day, and your only goal in life is finding a woman (or a guy) you can exploit sexually and financially. Doing what you're doing is extremely offensive to people who actually have autism and don't act anything like you. You obviously don't give a shit about them since you refuse to associate with anyone with autism, possibly out of a fear of getting caught.

I think you're a psychopath, Christian Weston Chandler, and the fact that you will once again avoid responsibility for your actions by refusing to read or answer this will only confirm my suspicions.

Have a nice day,

Sean August Watley}}
{{EmailReply|Obviously, You have YOUR OWN PROBLEMS, and you are only trying to pin them onto me. I am rubber, you are glue, whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks to you.}}

{{Mailbag}}

Mailbag 30

2011-02-15T21:07:08Z

Edrobot: /* Sneezing spreads the gay */

__NOTOC__'''Mailbag 30''' was uploaded to the [[CWCipedia]] 31 [[December 2009]]. [[Chris]] responded to it on 1 [[January 2010]].

None of his answers were half as interesting as the fact that he decided to advertise [[My Coke Rewards|Coke]] at the top of the page, making it clear that Chris has no idea how advertising works. Highlights of this mailbag include Chris assuming nonsense about how great a father he'd be, and playing along with a [[troll]] pretending to be [[Family Guy|Meg Griffin]]. He also reveals that he is under the impression that [[homos|gayness]] can be ''caught'', and probably also ''[[sonichu_10|cured]]'', much like the common cold.

==Answered==
===ACCIDENTALLY CRACK the parental lock code===
{{Email|From: hurdygurdy@doglover.com

Dear Chris

You completely ignored my question. If children are "channel surfing" and viewing adult programming, I am assuming they have cable. Therefore it is the parents' responsibility to lock those channels. Maybe your parents were bad parents and let you watch soft porn on HBO when you were sixteen but I lock those channels from my children. My children will never unlock them because they are well behaved. Only badly behaved spoiled brats would unlock cable to watch porn.

You have still failed to explain why Sonichu and Rosechu allow their children to watch unsuitable adult shows. Like I asked - and I want a straight answer this time - who explains to a three year old what pedophilia is?

I stand by my claim that Sonichu and Rosechu are bad parents and their children should go into care until you prove how letting children watch unsuitable adult programming is beneficial for them.}}
{{EmailReply|Children are going to Channel Surf and ACCIDENTALLY land on adult content, EVEN as far as to CRACK THE Parental Lock Code on the Cable/Satellite Box and [[Mass debating#Discovery|turn on Cinemax Late Night]] at worst. Sonichu and Rosechu, as Responsible Parents, are making sure of preventing such times by lightly introducing such topics with lighter shows like [[Family Guy]] so the children will know better.}}

===Sneezing spreads the gay===
{{Email|From: [[Wikipedia:DoctorWho Davros Skaledthal]] <fromskarowlove@aol.co.uk>

Greetings, Mister Chandler. My name is Davros Skaledthal. I am a geneticist, and I have a few questions after reading the latest issue of Sonichu. I deeply enjoy your comic, and especially the portrayal of Cwcville as a utopia. Every man should have a place to call his own, don't you agree?

First off, though, may I say how inspiring it is that you manage to make a high-quality page nearly every day. It must be incredibly taxing on you, but you seem to be coping admirably. Now, as to the questions.

1. You say that there is a 'gay gene' that can be cured. How exactly does this cure work, and which chromosome is said gay gene attached to?

2. As you have said in a previous mail post, you understand the basics of how evolution works. I'm not expecting you to discuss it at doctorate level of course, but as you know, a gene that is not used or is recessive does not transfer to the next generation. How then is the gay gene transmitted? Obviously every gay man or woman has two heterosexual parents, therefore the gay gene is not represented in either of them.

Thank you for taking the time to read this letter, and I know this is asking rather much from you, so I apologize in advance, but would you please elaborate on each of these questions with at least one full sentence? If not, I completely understand. Genius must do as genius must.

Thank you for your time, Mister Chandler.

Eagerly awaiting your response, Davros Skaledthal}}
{{EmailReply|1) It is neutrally attached to an X Chromosone. 2) It can be spread through such methods as Blood or Organ Transfusion, or there may be a slim, yet present, chance in spreading it through bodily liquid exchange such of which is sneezing.}}

===In which Chris plays along===
{{Email|From: [[Family Guy|Meg Griffin]] <meggriffin@quahog.com>

Why don't you come down to Quahog? We got, like, an animation fest coming up! You could come participate, show off your Sonichu and stuff, and, uhh... meet with me ;)

Meg Griffin.}}
{{EmailReply|LOL Obviously the person who sent this is playing off of my idea for the episode of Family Guy where I would guest star. Playing along... I will take that under great consideration, and there is a good chance. ;)}}

===In which Chris doesn't take shit under great consideration===
{{Email|From: [[Wikipedia:Jim Lee|Jim Lee]]

Hi, Chris! This is Jim Lee! I'm a professional comic artist who's worked for DC, Marvel, and Image!

Sorry about not including my email, but I'm a very busy man and I just barely have time to get in a few kind words for a budding young talent. Some of my friends have linked me comic pages you've done and I have to say you're doing extremely well for a kid your age! Most eight-year-olds don't have the focus for one comic's worth of material, let alone several hundred pages' worth! That shows a great deal of dedication!

You've got a long way to go, but don't we all? I'm 45, I've been drawing comics professionally since I was 25, and I still feel like greatness is just ahead of me. I've won the Harvey Special Award and drew the best-selling comic issue in history, but I can't let that get to me. If I ever slow down or give in to temptation to slack off, I'll squander all the goowill and fandom I've got, and I can't let that happen. With a couple more decades under your belt, you can stand alongside the greats with pride.

Just a few tips: 1) Get used to drawing your own characters, not just Sonic in different colors. It's nice to draw for comics you love, but you've got to show you can create your own characters too. 2) Don't just imitate your favorite artists' style, try and find your own. 3) Draw from life, every day; draw every day, period! Last, don't forget to look up some really good book on how-to-draw; I recommend "Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain," "Drawing Comics the Marvel Way!", and "Making Comics" by Scott McCloud. Those are great books and they'll teach you a lot about how the pros do it.

Keep reaching for the dream, Chris!

--Jim Lee}}
{{EmailReply|Thank you, Jim. I will take all that under great consideration.}}

===Chris quit guzzling cum===
{{Email|From: adam roa <adamroa@hotmail.com>
Hello Christian.

I have two questions. Firstly, I appreciate the level of detail and emotion you bring to the action scenes in the Sonichu comic. From panel to panel it's always a thrill-ride and I can barely contain myself as a reader. When I think back at how many memorable and exhilarating fight scenes have taken place over the years, I am overwhelmed and awe-struck. Such brilliant action, such incredible pacing, such sublime storytelling. So my first question is this: Which fight scene is your personal favorite? I must confess, I most enjoy the battle in issue 5... "*Lock-On* *Fire Blast + Flamethrower* Yikes! Sweet! Pffft... What the flame happened?"

And my second question is, do you still drink your own [[semen]]?

Thanks for keeping on,

Adam}}
{{EmailReply|Firstly, thank you for your support. And second, I do not.}}

===FUCK YEAH BILL===
{{Email|From: [[Bill The Scientist]] <billthescientist@hotmail.co.uk>
Hey CWC,

Bill the Scientist here,as well as the [[Boulder Dropping Whale]] and [[Yawning Squirtle]].

We have legions of fans and we feel that we should have our own series of comics, or if not, at least we should feature more in the Sonichu comics. Ask your fanbase, we're the most popular characters!

We hope you consider this suggestion,
Sincerely,
Bill the Scientist}}
{{EmailReply|No Comment.}}

==Rejected Mailbag==
===Dr. Dre's dead, he's locked in my basement===
{{Email|From: [[Wikipedia:Stan (song)|Stan]] 'Sonichu's Biggest Gay Fan' [[Wikipedia:The Marshall Mathers LP|Mathers]] <myteasgonecold@didomail.com>

Dear Chris,

I wrote but you still ain't callin! I left my cell, my pager, and my home phone at the bottom. I sent two letters back in autumn, you must not have got 'em... There probably was a problem with the hosting provider or something? Sometimes I type addresses too sloppy when I post 'em...

But anyways; fuck it, what's been up? Man, do you still "hate" us homos? My boyfriend wants us to adopt a kid, I'm about to be a gay father! If we adopt a daughter, guess what I'ma call her? I'ma name her Rosey!

I read about your fan Ryan Cash, I'm sorry. I had a gay friend kill himself over some dude who didn't want him...

I know you probably hear this every day, but I'm your Biggest Gay Fan! I even watched that hilarious rap that you did for Parappa. I got a room full of home-made posters with your drawings, man. I like the shit you did with LBP, too, that shit was phat!

Anyways, I hope you get this man, hit me back, just to chat, truly yours, your Biggest Gay Fan,

This is Stan.}}
{{EmailReply|Give It Up, JackAss; '''I Am Straight; Vaginas and Boobies Give Me MY ERECTIONS; You Damn Homos have NO CHANCE with me EVER. As for your question, you do what you want.}}

===In which Chris rejects excellent advice for the Nth time.===
{{Email|From: Jacob N. <jacob_n333@yahoo.com>

Good day, Chris!

"You are asking me to take Wild's girlfriend and Sweetheart away from him. Do not be such a monster." I'm afraid that he's in the right, Chris. You're experiencing what many comic companies suffer--what you might call "rights syndrome." When you use someone else's character, they still have the rights to that character, and what they say, goes. If you make any permanent changes to the character, you must get permission, and if the rights holder wants you to kill off or retire that character, you must.

This is why "shared universes" are so difficult to manage. Because [[Evan|Evang-y]] created [[Simonchu]], he has the right to withdraw him from the setting. Seeing as how you also changed Simonchu's gender without permission, that's already a strike against you. You should fulfill your obligation as writer and creator and listen to Evang-y. This happens all the time. There's no easy fix, either. You should also be thankful that Evang-y has allowed you to keep Simonchu/"Simonla's" previous appearances, because otherwise you would have to redraw and rewrite those comics to exclude Simonla if he just wanted her retconned out!

As for Wild losing his "sweetheart," don't look at it as him "losing a sweetheart," but you gaining a whole metric ton of storytelling opportunities! Hardship and difficulty is the backbone of storytelling. [[Sonichu 10|You could devote an entire issue to the story of Simonla's final battles and death,]] [[Sonichu 10#The_Final_Countdown|then whole issues afterward about the aftermath of the event, especially Wild's reaction.]] The Sonichu comics are lacking in any sort of pathos. Comic-Chris doesn't seem to care a bit about his various sweethearts being killed or leaving, the entire team has forgotten about Crystal, and even Blake being raped by Silvana has been glossed over. ([[Lovely Weather|Having sex with someone under false pretenses, e.g. posing as someone they love even though they're not, is most definitely a rape]].) Wild's true love being killed isn't something you can just gloss over. It will allow for all kinds of character growth and change--storytelling gold! Don't think of it as being "a monster" to Wild, think of it as tough love to make him better as a character.

I like my characters too, but it's not entertaining at all if the only changes that happen to them are for the better. Every character is defined as much, if not more, by loss than by gain, by their weaknesses as much as their strengths. If Peter Parker hadn't used his superhuman talents for petty gain, his uncle wouldn't have died; it's his grief over his uncle's death and shame over his selfishness that motivates him into becoming one of the greatest superheroes of all time, Spider-Man. It's his constant struggle between selfish gain and the greater good that makes him so entertaining, so fascinating, so well-rounded a character. When people try to make him less complex and more happy, as with the One More Day fiasco, it backfires dreadfully. You shouldn't be afraid to put your characters through the wringer... and in this case, you don't really have a choice, do you?

Good day to you, Chris.

--Jacob Nathaniel Lights-in-the-Sky of the Cherokee Nation}}
{{EmailReply|I will continue to do my work as I see fit.}}

===Chris is rubber, you are glue===
{{Email|From: Sean Watley <seanawatley@gmail.com>
Chris,

What's it like not having a conscience? It's pretty obvious that you're [[Chris and remorse|incapable of feeling guilt or remorse]] or even empathizing with other people. You drew pornography of your best friend, published it on the internet to prove some stupid point or affirm your manliness, and you only felt bad because Megan Schroeder stopped talking to you afterwards. You only befriend women because you want to have sex with them (some people would call this "nice guy" syndrome, but I think that it speaks to something much darker). And it's quite evident you're more interested in finding a woman to mooch off of when your parents die than entering into a relationship out of love. You're incapable of love because you only love yourself.

For somebody with "autism" you sure don't know a lot about it. I mean, you get basic facts about the disorder wrong, and become infuriated when people try to correct you. For starters, "High-functioning autism" isn't a formal diagnosis, and Asperger's Syndrome and autism are on the same spectrum. I think you found out about autism sometime in your teens and started using it as an excuse for your immaturity, lack of empathy, selfishness and disturbed behavior, and took the scam further in adulthood by getting disability money out of it. People with autism recognize they have limitations and get help to overcome or work around those limitations. Despite their autism they put forth effort to survive in a world they do not understand.

Autistic people don't run over small animals repeatedly and call it "the highlight of their day." Autistic people don't try to impersonate a woman's boyfriend and lure that woman to their home so they can rape them. Autistic people don't go around saying they want to force sex on their pastoral counselor. Autistic people don't steal their elderly parents' credit cards to finance their video game addiction. Autistic people don't commit fraud by purchasing Guitar Hero track packs from stores, using the codes to download the content, and then returning them for a refund or selling them on eBay, which is fraud. And they certainly don't brag about it in YouTube videos. Where did that big TV in your room come from, Chris? Did you steal that, too?

You constantly talk about murder and death in your videos. You fired up the video camera on Christmas Day to record more death threats. You suggest that people kill themselves because you don't like them. You sing along to Insane Clown Posse, (which is disturbing since you're almost 30) a group that makes light out of gruesome murder. You gave a "shout out" to the Columbine killers. And don't pretend you don't know who they are, you were enrolled in high school at the time of the massacre and there's no way you couldn't have heard about it, no matter how sheltered you were. And these are things you've done over the past few weeks.

The whole "Sonichu" thing and you acting like a bumbling, ignorant manchild is just an act, right? No 27-year-old would wear a cartoon medallion out in public and dress up like a mentally retarded person and film themselves playing house with Legos. This is an obvious charade: faking autism as an excuse for your horrific behavior and for disability money so you can sit in a room full of toys and play video games all day, and your only goal in life is finding a woman (or a guy) you can exploit sexually and financially. Doing what you're doing is extremely offensive to people who actually have autism and don't act anything like you. You obviously don't give a shit about them since you refuse to associate with anyone with autism, possibly out of a fear of getting caught.

I think you're a psychopath, Christian Weston Chandler, and the fact that you will once again avoid responsibility for your actions by refusing to read or answer this will only confirm my suspicions.

Have a nice day,

Sean August Watley}}
{{EmailReply|Obviously, You have YOUR OWN PROBLEMS, and you are only trying to pin them onto me. I am rubber, you are glue, whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks to you.}}

{{Mailbag}}

Talk:Chris and English

2010-07-10T03:14:10Z

Edrobot: /* Sarcasm */ new section

there's a difference between a spelling error (geinus or however he's been doing it for the past like what 6 years?) and typo

but i think this could be expanded to a Chris and English page imo [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 21:33, 21 October 2009 (CEST)
* Good point. --[[User:USAJAP1|USAJAP1]] 21:36, 21 October 2009 (CEST)
:*Chris and English sounds like a good idea to me. The way he talks and writes is unique, to say the least.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 21:50, 21 October 2009 (CEST)
::*Yeah, especially considering [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|this]]. --[[User:USAJAP1|USAJAP1]] 21:57, 21 October 2009 (CEST)

== Spelling errors ==
Geinus seems to be the main one he's been making for years. Any others? Observe his grammar patterns and other shit and stuff. Yeah. stuff. [[User:Clydec|Clydec]] 03:53, 22 October 2009 (CEST)
*"Seinor" is one he does consistently. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 06:00, 23 October 2009 (CEST)

==Autism==
I haven't read the article in full yet but I don't think there's anything noting that awkward speech is usually associated with autism. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 06:00, 23 October 2009 (CEST)
*It didn't even occur to me. My bad. --[[User:Beat|Beat]] 17:27, 23 October 2009 (CEST)
*Many autistics (at least aspies; you know, the ones whom Chris thinks are not actually autistic) are actually very precise and pendantic about grammar and spelling in a way that is quite unlike Chris. It wasn't for nothing that Hans Asperger called the kids he studied "little professors." --[[User:Doomknight|Doomknight]] 03:52, 2 December 2009 (CET)
*Likewise, some of the semantics thing is an autism thing. Like Chris answering "yes" to "Do you listen to music while drawing?" is an autistic thing. It's sorta like on [[Facebook]] when people would message him after he'd request to be their friend with "Do I know you?" and Chris would say something like "I don't know, I can't read your mind." Autistics tend to have very literal thinking and will fail to see the subtlety of a question, in this case "Do I know you?" is the socially accepted way of saying "Typically, people requesting to be my friend are people I know, and I don't know you. Are we connected in any way?" The "pen is mightier than the sword but more permanent than the pencil" is more of a random access humor thing. In fact, the random access humor is partially based in childish verb puns. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 04:33, 2 December 2009 (CET)
**The literal answers to questions deal is technically known as a lack of linguistic pragmatism. His fairly flat, unnaturally patterned speaking voice is probably a case of aprosodic speech. I'm mentioning it here because I don't think it matters much to the article, so I'm hesitant to add it (especially as my first edit), but there are attempts at technical terminology here and there. [[User:MaybeNever|MaybeNever]] 03:26, 3 May 2010 (UTC)

==Chris and abstract thinking==
Do you think this could be a "Chris and..." article? There is plenty of evidence that he is NOT an abstract thinker (This would highlight his "Child-like" thinking; children tend be concrete, i.e. literal, in their thinking, Chris is no exception). There's enough evidence of his concrete thinking to make into a separate article. . --[[User:Scarletdragon|Scarletdragon]] 23:21, 2 December, 2009 (CET)
*This is something that could be discussed in the [[autism]] article (and it's already discussed there) since this is really an autism thing. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 05:44, 2 December 2009 (CET)

== Attempts to sound suave and educated ==

I can't really pin it down (I'm not great at literary analysis), but I've noticed that Chris often attempts to sound like, I dunno, a 19th century upper-middle class English writer. For example, in the email describing his detective work regarding the photo taken at the Game Place, he refers to playing a card game with "a young gentleman." I'm too lazy to search for more examples but perhaps you guys know what I mean. I you agree this is a trait, it should be mentioned either here or in the [[Writing]] article. [[User:Glorious Tentacularity|Glorious Tentacularity]] 06:51, 6 December 2009 (CET)

==Name change==

This article should probably be renamed Chris and Language. What do you think? --[[User:Delabonte|Delabonte]] 16:23, 6 June 2010 (UTC)

== Renaming ==

I love how [[Spanish]] starts out and how it works without it being "Chris and Spanish." Perhaps the same should be done with this? thoughts? --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 17:45, 2 July 2010 (UTC)

== Sarcasm ==

I think we need a better example for Chris' inability to understand sarcasm. Yeah, he missed the fact that Dan Hibiki is a Joke Character, but you have to remember that Chris is woefully behind the times. Dan wasn't in Street Fighter II, which is probably the last Street Fighter game Chris has even heard of. And that's if Chris has even played Street Fighter. Plus, as of Street Fighter IV, Dan is (supposedly) more of a Lethal Joke Character. A better example would be his interview with Screwattack Europe, where it's pretty obvious that the interviewer is mocking him. --[[User:Edrobot|Edrobot]] 03:14, 10 July 2010 (UTC)

Chris and his ego

2010-04-26T22:49:10Z

Edrobot: /* Blind Luck and the Cherry Picking Fallacy */

{{quote|Firstly, YOU WISH YOU WERE ME...|Chris, [[Mailbag 10#Rejected Mailbag|Mailbag 10 (Rejected)]]}}

{{quote|For every one that exalteth himself shall be humbled; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted.|[[Chris and religion|Luke 14:11 (English Revised Version)]], really hitting the nail on the head}}

'''Egotism''', out of all of Chris's flaws, is the most important and self-destructive. It is this egotism that may one day lead to someone playing [[Kick the Autistic]] in real life.
[[Image:SchuComic0P44.jpg|thumb|'''egotism''', (noun): the belief that your pain (getting kicked out of the mall for being creepy) trumps all others (divorce and loss of beloved children)]]
==Origins==
Why is Chris such an egotist? In his sheltered childhood, his enabling parents taught him to shift blame for all of his troubles to other people. A sense of entitlement, again homegrown, skewed his perception of the proportionality between his problems and those of other people. Chris doesn't completely lack empathy; he isn't a sociopath, but the internal 'scale' by which he weighs the feelings of others is completely twisted. His autism compounded the problem by making it difficult for him to understand social cues and relate normally to his peers. [[Chris_and_reality#Outside_of_the_comics|He grew up in a different world.]]

But that explains why Chris ''was'' an egotist, ''struggled with'' egotism, or ''has tendencies towards'' egotism. While Chris's childhood was less than ideal, it shouldn't have been quite so crippling. Time and experience should have helped temper his ego, but Chris's development appears to have completely stopped altogether. Chris is still an egotist because he lives in a social time capsule that has allowed him to carry on for the better part of a decade without a single life lesson. And he still lives in that time capsule because it is easy, it is comfortable, and people let him.

===The Enablers===
[[Image:0063-BobAndBarbaraNewLife.jpg|thumb|Exhibit A]]
{{quote|He that spareth his rod hateth his son:<br />but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.|Proverbs 13:24}}
Chris's parents are enablers ''par excellence''. There is no earthly reason why (barring unrelated catastrophes) a man that is almost 30 years old and has autism should live at home with his parents, especially when his autism is as "high functioning" as Chris's activity and his documentation exemplify it to be. Adults with far more crippling mental health problems (from emotional disorders to mental retardation) live far more independently than Chris does, whether alone, alone with supervision, or in group homes.

For children like Chris, public school special education is generally geared toward helping the child understand how their disorder affects their lives, and what strategies they can use to minimize its impact. This is a well-documented and well-supported strategy, but it relies on "buy-in." Chris's parents clearly never bought into these strategies, because they never fostered any interest in instilling any form of independence in Chris, thus undermining the entire regimen of special education and ending up with a man-child with entitlement issues.

===Monthly Tugboat===
{{Main|Chris and Money}}

{{quote|My father helped me get my Social Security set up; I get more a month than I could at a job. | Chris, taking pride in being a lazy fuck.}}

Chris receives welfare from the government; a [[monthly tugboat|"monthly tugboat"]] as he calls it. Although intended for people who were unable to work, Chris continues to abuse the welfare system due to the fact that he is simply unwilling to work on anything except drawing [[Sonichu (comic)|his shitty comic]], [[Video games|playing video games]], and [[Love Quest|trying to find a girlfriend.]]

Regardless of whether Chris is abusing the welfare system, his parents are abusing it through him, or the system itself is flawed, the fact remains that the monthly tugboat that he receives is a major factor in making Chris's lifestyle—and thus his worldview—sustainable.

===Blind Luck and the Cherry Picking Fallacy===
[[Image:SlamAttack.jpg|thumb|Local Boy Levels Up]]
[[Image:391-SchuPVCCArticle.jpg|thumb|left|Article in PVCC's ''Forum'', proof that some people have too much time on their hands.]]
[[Image:Famewhore.jpg|thumb|McIntire Park]]
A [[GameStop Be A Star Sweepstakes|contest]] or [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|two]] here; a [[Chris Chan in the PokéNews|two-second local TV blip]] there. The results are that outside events most people never experience have stroked Chris's already monstrous ego.

Consider that Chris has produced a ''huge'' volume of fanmail, letters-to-the-editor, internet commentary, and other drivel. Each letter to Nintendo is a message in a bottle: most of them never return, but the one that does—on an official letterhead, and addressed to Mr. C. W. Chandler—is confirmation of his celebrity.<ref>[[An Official Sonichu Update]]</ref>

{{quotebox|Yeah...it says here that, uh, yeah...they—th—it goes on to say that:

:"Nintendo of America has some of the most devoted, enthusiastic fans of any game developer. Each week, they receive, uh, hundreds of thousands of suggestions about their games and systems. While they would love to, uh, use ideas from f—fa—from fans to develop actual products, due to the volume of the, uh, requests they receive and the resources it would take to process them, they do not accept unsolicited game or product ideas. But they are committed to being at the leading edge of game and hardware development, though, and they can be sure that they are constantly at work developing new and exciting products and game ideas."

Now, uh, here's the interesting part...where they quote about how I can actually...go further about ch—about them changing their minds and actually accepting the idea and helping me, uh, makin' it—makin' it totally real...with the video games and the TV animations and the action figures, and...officially-released—my personally-approved...medals... ''[...]'' they say that, uh, the best way to let other fans know about my idea or to generate hype about the future game I'd like to see is to post the ideas to the forums on their sites.}}<br />

As if Chris didn't think his material was golden to begin with, he got a second nod from ''Nintendo Power'' for his epic [[Animal Crossing Documentary]], and a page in [[PVCC]]'s ''Forum'' as icing on the cake. Even before his e-fame, Chris had plenty of evidence to convince himself that he ''was'' creative, and not just a high-volume, whiny jerk that had pestered his way to acknowledgment. As he graduated from [[PVCC]] in 2006, his writing shows that [[Sonichu]] was, in his mind, already tested: there was just some small threshold of notoriety or connections that needed to be breached, in order to become a true media sensation.

On top of that, Chris has a huge amount of free time to inject himself into situations like the [[McIntire Park]] meetings, which allows him to cherry-pick more moments of recognition. A tongue-in-cheek acknowledgment by the local council seems cute to us, but is serious business to him. And since Chris cherry-picks only the reinforcement that he wants, his legions of [[troll]]s just add to the fire. Delusion has led him to believe that he has a legion of fans; a few hundred emails in his inbox confirm it.

==Narcissistic Personality Disorder==
[[Image:Narcissus.jpg|thumb|TRUE and HONEST artist's depiction.]]
It's entirely possible however, that Chris suffers from [[Wikipedia:Narcissistic personality disorder|Narcissistic personality disorder]], whose diagnosis criteria detail many of the characteristics that Chris exhibits.

{{quotebox|The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders fourth edition, DSM IV-TR, a widely used manual for diagnosing mental disorders, defines narcissistic personality disorder (in Axis II Cluster B) as:

A pervasive pattern of grandiosity (in fantasy or behavior), need for admiration, and lack of empathy, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by five (or more) of the following:

1.has a grandiose sense of self-importance (e.g., exaggerates achievements and talents, expects to be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements)

2.is preoccupied with fantasies of [[Sonichu|unlimited success]], [[CWCville|power]], [[Honor roll|brilliance]], [[Chris and fashion|beauty]], or [[Sweetheart from the ground up|ideal love]]

3.believes that he or she is "special" and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions)

4.requires excessive [[Fanbase|admiration]]

5.has a sense of entitlement, i.e., unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations

6.is interpersonally exploitative, i.e., takes advantage of [[Sweetheart|others]] to achieve his or her [[China|own ends]]

7. [[Chris and death|lacks empathy]]: is unwilling to recognize or identify with the [[Megan|feelings and needs of others]]

8. is [[JERKS|often envious of others]] or believes others are [[Kick the Autistic|envious]] of him or her

9.shows [[Mailbag|arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes]]}}

As you can see, these criteria describe Chris's ego, right down to the sense of entitlement.

==Manifestations==

Chris's egotism manifests itself in many ways.

===Unwarranted Self-Importance===
[[Image:Apology_to_Mary_Lee.jpg|thumb|Very gracious.]]
:''See also: [[True and Loyal Fanbase]]''
{{quote|I have had way over a million fans worldwide since I went online in before 2000.|-Chris, [[Mailbag 48]]}}
As overwhelming as Chris's unwarranted self-importance is, it's easy for the novice observer to get lost in the sea of ''Sonichu'' shit and assume that he's just confident in his e-fame. "Of course," you say, "he's got a billion hits on YouTube and a thousand emails in his mailbox. He's going to think he's hot shit, like every other retard on the [[DeviantArt|internet]]."

But nothing sums up Chris's deep and abiding USI like this missive to [[Mary Lee Walsh]]:<ref>[[Mary Lee Walsh#Emails with Mary|Emails with Mary]]</ref>

{{quotebox|Mary, I've slept on it, and I have realized that note-hanging is not the way to get attention. And I don't really want to meet with either you nor Susan, no offense. I'll tell you what, let's forget the meeting, and if you will allow my newsletter to stay in distribution, I will do all of the following:

*I will never hang notes on the wall again.
*I'll consider stopping my Silent Treatment on Susan.
*I'll consider knocking you and Susan up my [[scale of Respect]] each by 2 points (0=No Respect...10=Respect).

Please reply via E-Mail.

Christian C.}}

E-fame just adds a whole new dimension. He was a misunderstood genius before; now he's a misunderstood genius with a [[personal army]].

{{quote|III'M. WOR-KIN'. ON IT! LET ME DO THAT STUPID VIDEO SO I CAN TELL [[True and Loyal Fanbase|E'RRYBODY, IN MY COMMAND]], TO GET EVERYTHIN'- HELP ME GET EVERYTHIN' OFF THE INTERNET!|Chris, [[THAT IS MY HOUSE]]}}

It's so bad now that when Chris meets someone new who claims not to know who he is, he seems skeptical and surprised.<ref>Exchange with the [[Man in the Pickle Suit]], [[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#Meet the Pickle .2801:21:44 - 01:25:29.29|Emily Date Conversation Transcript]]</ref>

{{quote|Y'all should know me by now, but if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of Sonichu, the Electric Hedgehog Pokemon, back on March 17th, 2000.|Chris, in his [[CWC's Second Message|second YouTube video]]}}

The instant-gratification, instant-acknowledgment, and instant-attention—good or bad—that has come with his minor e-fame of the last few years has thoroughly convinced Chris that people ''do'' read everything he writes, and that his YouTube messages ''invariably'' get to his target audience.

===Persecution Complex===
[[Image:Issue4.jpg|thumb|Saint CWC the Martyr.]]

Chris has a lot of problems, and even the ones he [[lie|'takes responsibility for']] are still out of his hands.

*His [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|school]] was [[Kick the Autistic|mean to him]].
*He didn't deserve that [[Song of Christian|F in English]].
*Or the one in [[CADD Chef|CADD]].

And if that wasn't enough, he thinks every authority figure in the land is conspiring against his [[Love Quest]]:

{{quote|Then in Mid-October, the Quote/Unquote "Dean of Student Services," Mary Lee Walsh, approached me and pulled my sign away from me and told me, "You're NOT ALLOWED TO FIND TRUE LOVE HERE." MY HEART WAS SHATTERED that very moment.|Chris, on his [[User:ChrisChanSonichu_profile#Enter_the_Wicked_Witch_of_the_Private_Villa_of_Corrupted_Citizens|Wikipedia Page]]}}

It doesn't help that he's engaged in a quagmire of a war against the [[homo]] rumors that those DAMNED TROLLS keep spreading about him, with a second front versus the [[Chris and copyright|copyright]] violating [[Liquid Chris|thieves]].

{{quote|It's out of my control! I don't know where to go! I DUNNO KNOW WHERE TA GO!|Chris, THAT IS MY HOUSE}}

It has never—and likely ''will'' never occur to him that he needs to go ''outside'', get a job, and get off the damned internet.

===Naïveté===
Chris's simple-mindedness and gullibility are legendary. The man is like the Sith: he only deals in absolutes. Either you're with him or you're a [[troll]]. This has been very obvious in his answers to the [[Mailbag]], where he refuses to listen to any talk—even from professionals—about the similarities between [[Asperger Syndrome]] and [[autism]], denies that there are any shortcomings in his [[Sonichu (comic)|work]], and shrugs off any advice about how to improve his health or appearance, labeling anyone who suggests he has any kind of shortcoming a troll.

Chris equates [[honesty]] with divulging every last detail about his life. Nothing is too candid for Chris- getting haircuts, drinking his own [[navy]], [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|shitting his pants]], or even giving away his phone number and home address! The only thing he hasn't done with wild abandon is give away his social security number and when that happens, it probably won't be a surprise to anybody.

His gullibility is astounding. No matter how many times it's happened before, Chris is easily led around by trolls promising [[china]] or threatening [[Sonichu]]. The earlier trolling schemes, such as [[Blanca]], [[PandaHalo]] and [[Jimmy Hill]], got Chris to jump through hoops and exposed so much information about Chris and his personality that they had to start a [[CWCki|wiki]] to keep track of it all.

In 2009 and 2010, Chris has slowly begun to "learn" to distrust trolls or to keep more of his [[PSN|information]] secure. However, many of his trolls believe this is akin to putting a shock collar on an animal. Eventually, in order to stop being shocked (not because they actually understand or care) an animal will start doing as it is told.

===Hubris: The Pride Before the Fall===
[[Image:NeitherOfUs.jpg|thumb|It's fair to say that Chris is a narcissist.]]
{{quote|I'd say... I'd say I'm all around. You see, the problem is that I have too many skills that I am good at. You might say that I am a jack of all trades and a master of none.|Chris, [[Mumble 3|right about that last part]]}}
Numerous times, Chris has shown that he believes he has powers and abilities far beyond those of mortal [[slow-in-the-minds|autistics]]. In fact, this attitude has transcended self-confidence and erupted into full-blown hubris: Chris is convinced that his [[Chris and writing|writing]], [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys|musical]] [[Guitar Hero|talents]], and [[Chris and art|art]] are not just competitive with his peers, but clearly superior.

And he doesn't just have the power to create: his is also the power to destroy. This line of thinking is exemplified by Chris's acceptance that [[Ryan Cash]] committed suicide just because he withheld ''Sonichu'' updates, and would worsen when he believed that his [[curse-ye-ha-me-ha|curse]] actually caused [[Liquid Chris]] to have some sort of horror befall him.

But those are just the most insane moments of cognitive dissonance. What about the time he went into hysterics when he didn't get a recognition for his art?

{{quote|I should have been Highly Recognized for my ARTISTIC TALENTS I showed in my Many Art Classes for the Award Ceremonies before Graduation Day. I felt crestfallen greatly from not getting recognized for any of my Talents. I EXCELLED IN MATH TOO FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!|Chris, on his [[User:ChrisChanSonichu_profile#Graduation|Wikipedia page]]}}

Or his reaction to losing the [[Adam Stackhouse|Parappa Contest]]?

{{quote|So that SWORN ON MY AUTISM, JUSTICE WILL BE SERVED TO THE SEVEN PEOPLE OF THOSE FOUR VIDEOS!!!!|Chris, on the [http://web.archive.org/web/20070830114517/http://sonichuchandler.tripod.com/cwcson.htm Sonichu Site]}}
[[Image:How chris sees himself.jpg|thumb]]
All of the above is consistent with the behavior of small children, who, isolated from the real world by a lack of comprehension and limited mobility, believe themselves to be godlike beings. This belief is gradually destroyed as the child goes to school and encounters outside authority, leading to their acknowledgment of the fact that they are, in fact, ordinary people. Of course, since Chris is not only autistic but also extremely sheltered, he still manages to cling to this belief by focusing on specific aspects of his life and constructing [[CWCville|elaborate fantasy worlds]]. This is also probably why he sees mundane chores as horrific trials of strength and will. In psychological terms, this can be referred to as 'psychological neoteny,' which is basically the retention of juvenile traits well into physical maturity.

Also consistent with his childlike mindset is his apparent belief that he has supernatural powers. In Freudian terms, this is referred to as 'omnipotence of thought'. Basically, Chris cherry-picks elements of his life in order to validate his fantasy of control, which is more systematically displayed in the Sonichu comics. Taking this into consideration, it's likely that Magi-chan is yet another Mary Sue for Chris (which adds more fuel to certain theories), serving as a kind of avatar for his desire for authority. Why he felt it necessary to make another character to fill this role is unclear, considering he's already established [[Chris-chan Sonichu|himself]] as the one true God of [[CWCville]].

Another aspect of Chris's arrogance, and again caused by his childish way of viewing the world, is visible in [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 9|a phone call]] with [[Asperchu|Alec]]. In the call it is obvious Chris does not follow a mature procedure for developing a stance on issues. Where normally an individual will learn information about the issue and from there decide how they feel about that issue, Chris does it the other way around and decides how he feels about something, then refuses to believe, understand, or even humor any evidence to the contrary. While most people have very strong beliefs in some issues, so much so that they automatically have a prejudice against people believing differently (E.G. Politics, religion, etc), Chris has this perspective on everything. He takes a position on matters, then finds ways to back it up and ignores all evidence for the opposing viewpoint. For example, Chris has decided [[homos]] are bad, so he selectively finds information that backs up his stance on the matter and ignores anything anyone will tell him about why his homophobia is bad and makes him a bad person. He will then go as far as to pretend he can [[Sonichu_10#Curing_Da_Homos|cure homosexuality]] with his own blood. Unless disliking homosexuals means he may [[I'm_Sorry,_Dude|not get laid]].

This is most obvious when he takes two contrary positions about a similar topic. The obvious example of this is Chris's understanding of the way [[parody]] functions. Chris will defend his right to make Sonichu to the hilt by claiming it is a [[Parody#Hypocrisy|parody]], but he then states that Asperchu is a bad thing because it is a parody. As you can see, Chris has decided that he has every right to make Sonichu so he backs this up with statements about his right to parody existing trademarked characters, but conversely he has decided Asperchu is bad, so he supports this position by stating it is a parody of his legitimate work.

===Materialism===

{{quote|I want Julie! Yeah, love is my first priority, but then- but then I want my stuff back!|Chris, caring more about his precious PSN Account and Sonichu website, more than his [[troll|sweetheart]].}}

It is clear that Chris is a materialist (a common symptom of Narcissism), buying large amounts of crap that make him feel good about himself, and by some twisted form of reality make him think that his unhealthy amount of children toys might attract a [[sweetheart]], when in reality any human being would clearly see that this man is [[Naïve|delusional]].

===Tender Misanthropy===

A "tender misanthrope" is, by definition, "someone who despises humanity in general, but is ever ready to make an exception for the ''real'' people". In other words, an egotist who pretends to be benevolent. While it's obvious that Chris is an egotist, he truly believes that he's benevolent. He is the perfect example of a tender misanthrope, screaming death threats at what he knows of humanity (seeing as the only social contact he gets is from the Internet) while also believing that he is a kind, loving person who can [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|give advice]] and act as a role model for children.

Another part of the definition states that "a tender misanthrope feels certain of being able to love real people if only they could be found - or, failing that, to transform existing false people into idealized ''real'' people through social and political programs of the tender misanthrope's own making". The way that Chris treats [[homos]], seeing as he hates them all ([[Mailbag_53#Well,_that_makes_everything_better!|no matter what he says]]) and wants to turn them straight by placing them into co-ed prisons, reprogramming them into straights via concentration camps, or by creating a vaccine that "cures" homosexuality, certainly fits this description. The fact that he also generalizes trolls as homos also supports this. If that does not convince you that Chris feels he can make people into what he can emotionally attach himself to, there are also other [[Sweetheart from the Ground-Up|obvious examples]] in his unique delivery of his intentions.

===Disregard of rules of conduct online===

{{quote|DO NOT DELETE, NOR CENSOR, MY BOMBASTIC PROTEST!!!!!!|Chris, in [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica#4 September|Encyclopedia Dramatica]]}}

Chris has little regard for the rules of online communities; when he joins up on websites, he tends to do things his way. He assumes that his own niche in these websites is under his absolute control: for example, he assumed that [[Wikipedia]] would allow him to post anything on his personal user page, or that [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] would remove material critical to him if he just asked not-so-nicely. Sites like [[deviantART]] and [[YouTube]] allow community participation; Chris simply disallowed comments, or later on, just ignored every comment he received. Chris also assumes that when other people host websites for him (in case of [[CWCipedia]]), he's given the final say on all matters.

==War against the ego==
One of the main forces opposing Chris's ego are the [[white knights]]. These [[slow-in-the-minds|misguided souls]] have attempted to get Chris to understand that what he's doing is ridiculous and that he needs to grow up. Instead, he brushed them all aside, assuring himself that he was [[Honest Content|TRUE and HONEST]], and could do no wrong. One of the more popular white knights, [[Vivian Gee]], became a troll when she couldn't get through to Chris.

When asked to get real, psychiatric help, Chris has said that his church counselor, [[Rocky Shoemaker]], is enough for him, and that she could do so much more than someone with ''an actual degree in that field.'' He seems to believe that because her title includes the word "counselor," she is every bit as qualified as a real doctor (the fact that most pastoral counselors see people for free probably helps as well, since Chris would never spend part of his precious [[monthly tugboat]] on something useful when there are [[video games]] to buy).

==Examples of Chris's Ego in the Real World and in the Comic==
[[Image:SchuComic8P68.jpg|thumb|250px|[[Jiggliami]] sums it up nicely]]
{{Main|Examples of Chris's Ego}}
{{clear}}
==References==
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{{Health problems}}
{{Chris and}}
[[Category:Chris-chan]]