Random-access humor

2010-02-07T18:03:02Z

Eurypterid: /* Random ramblings */

: '''random access''' ''n.''
:: 1. ''(computing)'' type of storage access where arbitrary data can be accessed, as opposed to sequential access (q.v.). ''See also'' random access memory.
:: 2. ''(CWCism)'' non-sequiturial; lacking any coherence.
: '''humor''' ''n.''
:: 1. Something funny.
:: 2. ''(CWCism)'' Something not funny, but which can be made funny through application of random access (q.v.)
[[Image:Wild_Snergen_Flergen.jpg|thumb|Wild Sonichu offers some uproarious Random Access Humor]]
'''Random-access humor''' is [[Chris]]'s terminology for his tendency to blurt out whatever random thought enters his mind, regardless of its relevance to a given situation. Normal human beings might describe this as "[[Wikipedia:Non sequitur|non sequitur]]." The "humor" part of the phrase stems from Christian's assumption that if he says something completely irrelevant and random that it is automatically funny, which is a common fallacy among nerds and retards. At this moment, the strongest portrayal of Chris's random-access humor can be found in his [[CWCFlyingElephants]] video.

Chris's random-access humor is often unoriginal, and jokes are mostly taken from [[Adult Swim]] shows, ''[[Monty Python's Flying Circus]]'', ''[[Family Guy]]'', or even shows like [[Wikipedia:Ed, Edd 'n Eddy|''Ed, Edd n Eddy'']] and [[Wikipedia:Samurai Pizza Cats|''Samurai Pizza Cats'']], making them completely out of context. This shows that, even when Chris doesn't have to make any sense, he still has a hard time coming up with original material. When Chris ''is'' original, it's mostly in the form of childish rhymes or making word-plays. This is due to Chris being a [[Autism papers|"somewhat concrete"]] thinker, having a tough time understanding abstract concepts (including humor). Because of his linear thinking, he has the tendency to take jokes literally (e.g. Bob told Chris a joke about Obama painting the White House black if he won the 2008 election).

Chris also uses the term "random-access memory", which is basically when he says something completely random without the intent of being funny. Mostly, he uses these when a conversation is going a direction that he doesn't want to and hopes that interjecting this other thought-line will let him not be reminded (if only briefly) of what a failure he is.

{{quote|Well, just like a computer, my brain is random. It picks up memories at random. I cannot simply access them sometimes, even though, most of the time, I can. But sometimes I can't, and they later come back to me at random.|[[Father Call|Chris, showing off his mad computer science and neuroscience skills]]}}

==Random ramblings==

In November [[2007]], in a misguided attempt to help [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] to get to know him better and stop trolling him, Christian added the following to his ED page:

<blockquote>
----

Each Brain in every person in the world is a computer, complete with an InfiniteGB RAM...Emphasis on Random, and our [[Christian Weston Chandler|Autistic Hero]] is no exception. Here are some of his ramblings that can make him comparable to the TV-Talking-styles of those retarded robots, the [[Transformers Generation 1|Junkeons]]...

{{quote| -"Carrots are good for your eyes, can it dial a phone?"<ref>Originally said by Ed; originated from Ed Edd n Eddy episode [http://www.tv.com/ed-edd-n-eddy/one-plus-one-equals-ed/episode/117706/summary.html "One Plus One Equals Ed"]</ref>
 -"Uncle Spunky is a Funky Monkey."
 -"[[Yellow Is a Mellow Color]]."
 -"All aboard, here we go, let's go...somewhere else."
 -"[[CWCFlyingElephants|I once knew a man from Nantucket, and he had on his head a stupid bucket.]]"
 -"I'm gonna call my lawer, his name is Tom Seywer, he has a daughter named Sue, who has been visiting her Uncle Sam for many years. Poor Tom."
 -"I knew a nose from the Pocanose, but then he ran away to Snotsvillvania."
 -"Quiet everybody, Emperor Fred has an announcement...FRED." <ref>From the US-dubbed version of Samurai Pizza Cats. Emperor Fred only said his name because he had "had his wisdom teeth removed."</ref>
 -"Call 'Right Now', and [[I Want a Girlfriend for Christmas|we'll send you]] [[All I Want For Christmas Is a Pretty Girlfriend|a beautiful girl]] to be your [[Sweetheart]], FREE. But you'd better call 'Right Now', or otherwise you'll get bupkis. And believe me, you do not want bupkis. Welcome to Bupkistown."
 -"Welcome to the Novelty Shop, this is [[Bob Chandler|Bob]], how can I help you?...Okay, we can do that."
 -"Well get out of here. What are you waiting on? I'm gonna chase you outta here."<ref>Originally said by Meatwad; originated from ''[[Aqua Teen Hunger Force]]'' episode [http://athf.frostillusions.net/transcripts/oldrippy.html "Ol' Drippy"]</ref>
 -"You've got a Hippo on your head."
 -"[[Transformers]]. Robots on your head. Okay."
 -"I'm upside-down in a car, drivin' my way to the grocery store."
 -"I have bow-ties on my feet, I must be walking with my neck."
 -"Root-de-do-de-do. Stop saying 'Root-de-do-de-do,' that's my bit, get your own. Oh, okay, how about 'Spling-ling, bling-ling, splee-de-de-le-deee?'"
 -"What? Pod six doesn't need a Pro Shop, they need a dentist. <ref>''Sealab 2021'' episode "Legend of Baggy Pants" (Pod Six was another pod that was part of the lab. Captain Murphy referred to them as "[[JERKS|jerks]]")</ref>"
 -"Is this [[Wes Iseli|Walter Grisby]]? Who threw a frisbee? Well you know what?"

|Chris-Chan|}}

I Watch TOO MUCH FUCKING TELEVISION!!!
----

</blockquote>

==Sauces==
<references/>

==See also==
*[[Punchy]] - A fighting electric hedgehog Pokémon who is implied to be the master of RAH, although, so far, he hasn't shown it.
*[[Monty Python]] - Actual masters of RAH, whom Chris unsuccessfully tried to emulate.
*[[CWCFlyingElephants]]
*[[I Got A Fish]]
*[[Bunny Hop]]
*[[Yellow is a Mellow Color]]

{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category: CWC-isms]]

Down with Asperchu

2010-01-11T23:47:03Z

Eurypterid: /* Transcript */

Since [[Christian Weston Chandler]] thought he was victorious over the [[Homos|gays]] after getting the despised ads taken off of his [[CWCipedia]], he imposed his [[Chris and anger|wrath]] upon Alec Benson Leary, the creator of [[Asperchu]].

Chris delusionally calls Asperchu [[Chris and hypocrisy|'''fan fiction''']] and a [[parody]], continues to deny any links between [[Asperger's]] and [[autism]], and calls out to his [[fanbase]] not to read any of the Asperchu comics. Throughout the video he makes insane [[Chop_Chop_Master_Onion%27s_Rap_Showdown|karate-chop]] style handmovements in an attempt to illustrate what he is saying.

For some reason, Chris had started wearing his [[Amnyfest Ring]] around his [[Sonichu medallion]].

==Video==

<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Down with Asperchu
| image = {{#ev:youtube|RZelFvv2pas}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 9 January 2010
| Maker = [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Fanartn.PNG‎]] Fan Art
| Performance Style = [[Image:Rage.png]] [[Rage]]
| Saga = Pending
| previous = [[This was my fault]]
| next = [[Down with Asperchu|Current]]
}} </center>

===Transcript===

Currently wearing my ring on my medal, [[Captain's Log]], Stardate January 9th, 2010.

Welp, on the one hand, I am pleased to announce that I have finally got through to their thi-to the homosetsuals' thick skulls, that [[I am STRAIGHT|I am straight]] and [[Sonichu 10|I do not care for their kind]].

On the other hand, it backfired on me, because...the sup-because Alex Something paid off Jack Thaddeus for the adspace, and now is falsely ad-and now is wrongfully advertising his [[Sonichu (comic)|FAN FICTION]], (''dramatic glasses removal'') and I emphasize fan fiction, and parodic Asperchu.

Not only is he trying to play...on any "LINKS" between Asperger's and Autism which there are not. I'm not saying similarities, I'm saying LINKS. Anyway, his character not only is a parody and a-fu-a vulgar fan fiction, of my Sonichu character, but he plays off of my [[obesity|PAST Buddha Belly]], (''in a high girly voice'') and my masculine bosoms!

He is not to be trusted and [[Chris and his Ego|his comics are not to be read.]] And therefore, I am making the statement that I have absolutely NO LINK or connections with him whatsoever, Mr. Alex Something and his Asperchu. And therefore, with all that, it is...everything that he draws is NOT in canon of my Sonichu comics or the CWCipedia whatsoever. So, completely abandon him, I say so! I have spoken there!

And also, with HIS placement of my character in HIS comics, I am at this moment and this date verifying that he is in the WRONG! He is in the wrong, especially with epi-wi-stu-with doing the, with doing it with HIS homosetsual take and I do not care for that.

No links, ther-I have no connection or establishments or anything canon between his comics and mine, and his...ver-and his sss-parodic COPYCAT parody of my CWCipedia. So at this moment I will leave you with that,

DOWN WITH ALEC AND HIS ''FREAKIN''' ASPERCHU!!

Little sunbitch thinking he tryin' to bribe ME off (''raspberry'') ''HE GOT ANOTHER THING COMING! [[Death_threats|DIE'', you son of a bitch, Alec, die!]]

But as for everybody else and, uh, as for most everybody else, I say-uh peace, stay safe, and have a good day. And continue to enjoy Sonichu comics, two pages a day.

Bye now.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[This was my fault]]|nextlink=[[Down with Asperchu|Current]]|}}

CWCki - User contributions [en]

Random-access humor

Down with Asperchu