CWCki - User contributions [en]

BlueSpike

2026-06-29T00:42:36Z

FromtheWordsofBR: /* Prank Calls */

{{Articleofthenow}}
{{Imposter}}
{{Troll|BlueSpike was the troll behind Julie and Max}}
{{quote|I can tell in my heart Julie IS 19.|Chris on Julie.<ref name = Mumble10>[[Mumble 10]]</ref>}}
{{infobox Person
| title = BlueSpike
| image = Bluespikeohexploitable.png
| imagesize = 250px
| name = "David Harlow"<ref>[[Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David]]</ref>
| aliases = BlueSpike LeonSpike Julie Milvana Max Milvana JULAAAY
| day = 12
| month = 10
| year = 1996
| birthsrc = <ref name="kiwi">[https://kiwifarms.net/members/bluespike.24172/ Bluespike's Kiwi Farms account]</ref>
|gender = [[MALE]]
|nationality = [[United States|American]]
|race = White
|occupation = {{TrollOccupation}}
|saga = {{saga|julie|cn}}, {{saga|ps3|cn}}, {{saga|callingout|cn}}
}}

'''BlueSpike''' (AKA '''LeonSpike''', "a 13 year old brat" with [[Asperger syndrome]] according to Chris<ref>[[Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David]]</ref>) was a young troll who contacted Chris through two feigned identities: a [[sweetheart]] named '''Julie''' and her evil brother '''Max'''. However, more of the trolling had involved BlueSpike going under the Julie persona.

Playing as Julie, BlueSpike had phone sex with Chris for hours each night, listening to Chris [[Mass debating|masturbating]].<ref>[[CWC Cums for a Cat]]</ref><ref>[[Bob walks in]]</ref> As BlueSpike was in complete control of Chris, he could have done more sinister things, but night after night he engaged in nothing but noisy, fabricated (on Blue's end) phone sex and listening to Chris jacking off very loudly. (Draw your own conclusion about his sexuality.)

BlueSpike's trolling caused Chris to admit to Julie that he had tried using [[sex toys|a dildo and anal beads]], convinced Chris to [[Ohio trip|take a long drive to Ohio]] in what he saw as an effort to rescue his girlfriend, produced the infamous [[For Julie's Eyes Only|sex tape]] where he fucks [[Kimmi]], made him describe a future scene from [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]] alluding to his [[Gay 4 Sonichu|gay fans]], and was the impetus for the legendary incident where [[Bob Walks In|his father walked in]] to him with his pants down. He was also responsible for other sick shit, including coercing Chris into shoving shards of his [[Medallions|Sonichu Medallion]] up his ass while he watched and mocked him. After that, and subsequently being kicked out of [[Trolls#The Miscreants|the Miscreants]], he was involved in relatively minor trolling incidents before fading into irrelevance.

BlueSpike's treatment of Chris is considered to be sadistic: his behavior departed from standard trolling and amounted to [[Julie Reveals Herself|emotional and even sexual abuse]]. His harsh treatment of Chris was unparalleled by any of Chris's past [[trolls]], and was not matched until the likes of the [[Idea Guys]] appeared nearly a decade later. Of the classic trolls, Chris has noted that he hates BlueSpike the most for the traumatic experience he caused during that Mumble call, along with tricking him into taking [[Ohio trip|a long road trip]] that scared his parents half to death.<ref>[[June 2021 social media posts#Discussing trolls and other stuff]]</ref> BlueSpike effectively provided the model that all controversial trolls following him would use – though, unlike most that followed, he was actually successful in his goals. Also unlike many subsequent controversial trolls, BlueSpike eventually expressed regret for his actions years later.


==Prologue==
{{Incomplete|Information on the creation of the Mumble Chats|BlueSpike's early interactions with Chris and Clyde}}

BlueSpike was one of a set of false gal-pals created specifically to troll Chris with.

==Personas==
===Julie===
{{quote|JULAAAAAAY, JULAAAAAAY!!!!|Chris [[For Julie's Eyes Only|professes his undying love while screwing]] [[Kimmi|a doll]].}}

[[File:ChrisandJulieLBP.jpg|thumb|right|200px|Chris and Julie, together in [[LittleBigPlanet]]. The salad days.]]
[[Image:LetterfromJulie(2of2).jpg|thumb|left|100px|What Chris believed Julie looked like.]]

'''Julie Milvana'''<ref>[[BlueSpike Skype Logs 5]]</ref> (born 13 July 1989<ref>[[BlueSpike PSN Chat 4]]</ref>) was a [[Molvanîa]]n Methodist<ref>[[Mumble 8]]</ref> ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' fan who became Chris's sweetheart after [[PandaHalo]]."Julie" first appeared in IRC in December [[2008]], suggesting the infamous [[Tour of Chris's House]] video.<ref>[[IRC (15 December 2008)]]</ref> She later posed a ton of ''Sonichu'' questions submitted by fans<ref>[[IRC (28 December 2008)]]</ref> and was invited to [[Sonichu Girls]].

As early as 3 [[January 2009]], she asked Chris what he would do if a [[JERK]] kidnapped his [[heartsweet]]--he said, ''"I would learn his demands if any, or if he hurt her, I'd strike the jerk back."'' Julie also got excited by the prospect of an orgy with Chris and the Sonichu Girls.<ref>[[IRC (03 January 2009)]]</ref> The next day, it was revealed that Chris had promised his virginity to both Panda and Julie, and both ladies were furious, with Julie threatening to kill herself.<ref>[[IRC (04 January 2009)]]</ref> Later she calmed down and moved to Ohio to live with relatives. Ever classy, Chris suggested a threesome with PandaHalo.<ref>[[BlueSpike Skype Logs]]</ref> Chris refused to drive to Ohio, instead insisting that Julie come to him. He also couldn't be bothered to attack Clyde in IRC, even when he threatened Julie.<ref>[[BlueSpike Skype Logs 2]]</ref>

When Chris chose [[Sarah May]] over her, Julie was crushed. Chris apologized, and then abruptly [[Autism|went back to talking about vidya]].<ref name="a">[[BlueSpike Skype Logs 4]]</ref> Clyde Cash made more serious threats against Julie, forcing Chris to upload a famous [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|5 February 2009 video]] admitting that he was gay.<ref name="a" /> Once Chris got it into his head that PandaHalo had burned to death in a wildfire, he began to focus even more on Julie as a sweetheart.

Chris received a [[Letter from Julie|letter]] written by Julie, the first physical [[:File:LetterfromJulie(2of2).jpg|proof]] of her "existence." In it, it details the love professed by her to Chris. That Valentine's Day, Chris uploaded [[LittleBigPlanet|a ''LBP'' level]], and Chris and Julie brought their relationship to the next level with cybersex. [[Bob Chandler]] [[Bob Walks In|walked in]], and the rest is history. [[Borb|Chris's parents]] didn't believe that Julie was TRUE and HONEST.<ref>[[Bob Walks In Aftermath]]</ref>

In an [[For Julie's Eyes Only|infamous video]] on 20 [[February 2009]], Chris created a sex video for Julie with the help of his inflatable assistant Kimmi, in order to give Julie an idea of what their first time together would be like. Chris's tender and passionate cries of "JULAAAAAAAY!" proved one of the most striking and memorable of [[CWC-isms]]; to this date, many erroneously believe that Kimmi ''is'' Julie. This is not so; Chris may be the most desperate man alive, but he's not quite got to the point where he's convinced himself any of his sex dolls are real.

A set of postcards showing the act were sent to [[14 Branchland Court]]. [[Bob Chandler|Bob]] got a hold of these postcards, which prompted him to take Chris's [[PSEye]] away.

===Max===
[[Image:Gilded.jpg|thumb|left|200px|What Max is presumed to look like.]]
'''Max Milvana''' was the abusive brother of Julie. The Max persona was typically used for instances where Julie was in peril, or when BlueSpike wanted to engage in tormenting Chris directly.

[[Image:Nnocac.jpg|thumb|150px|Receipts from Chris's epic journey to Cleveland. Note that he asked for no [[pickle]]s on the mayo hamburger, and that the place he at was a [[Sonic]] Drive-In.]]
Max and [[Clyde Cash]] convinced Chris that he had kidnapped Julie at the Miscreant Headquarters in Cleveland, Ohio,<ref name = Mumble10/> and was planning to send her over to [[China]].<ref>[[Clyde E-mails]]</ref> In response, Chris valiantly [[Ohio trip|travelled all the way to Ohio]] in a bid to rescue her and got his parents all worried. (His ancestors' spirits had wished him "a Safe Trip to Ohio" two days prior at [[Aunt Corrina]]'s funeral.)<ref>[[Jackie Chat 7]]</ref> Unfortunately, because Chris got the "wrong" address, he ended up at a run-down house in the ghetto that was inhabited by an elderly black woman.<ref>[[BlueSpike Skype Logs 13]]</ref>

Under the Max persona, BlueSpike hacked into Chris's Yahoo! and PSN accounts, threatening Chris that he would either take Julie away or sell both of the accounts on [[eBay]]. He goaded Chris into doing various embarassing things in order to get the accounts back, ranging from [[Chris and anger|raging]], to stating that he is a [[homos|homo]], to declaring [[BILLY MAYS]] as the new mayor of CWCville.

As with the Julie persona, Chris also engaged in sexual acts involving the Max persona. In one instance Chris claimed that he would show Max [[duck|his penis]] per his request.<ref>[[Julie Reveals Herself: The Prequel]]</ref> However, Max also claimed that he had no interest in seeing Chris's penis. In the very next video, Max tried to goad Chris into showing his penis to him after telling him that he doesn't have one, only to then frantically reject this when Chris actually attempts it.<ref>[[Julie Reveals Herself]]</ref> He also suggested in the same video that Chris ejaculate on the medallion if he ever wanted to see Julie again.

On that fateful day, Max, power-mad with control over Chris, caused a schism between the trolls who had followed Chris up to this point.

==Julie Reveals Herself==
[[Image:Advicespikemedallion.png|thumb|left|Kids say the darndest things.]]
{{Main|Julie Reveals Herself}}

{{quote|BlueSpike, stop this shit.|A troll's reaction to BlueSpike prompting Chris to shove pieces of his medallion up his ass.}}

On 3 [[March 2009]], Max gained control of Chris's PlayStation Network account, and during an hour-long audio session threatened to sell the PSN account and forbid Julie from seeing Chris. Chris was coerced into declaring [[BILLY MAYS]] to be the mayor of CWCville and shoving the pieces of his destroyed [[medallions|Sonichu medallion]] up his anal cavity, before he was able to talk to Julie, at which point Julie admitted that both she and Max were the figments of BlueSpike's imagination. At no point did BlueSpike even mention the sex tape (which had already gotten nearly 2 million hits on SlutLoad). BlueSpike's female voice was an unconvincing falsetto, which makes it all the more surprising that it worked so well on Chris. This incident shattered both his [[heart level]] – [[List of things Chris has shoved up his ass|and his anus]] – to 0%.

{{-}}

===Reaction===

[[Image:Cheers09.jpg|thumb|right|BlueSpike was kicked out of [[The Miscreants]] following the incident.]]

On 5 [[March 2009]], an all-out civil war broke out between trolls on the Chris-chan [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|ED]] discussion page on whether BlueSpike had gone too far, whether he was a hypocrite, or if he was merely a tool initiated by Clyde Cash to deceive Chris into further milking for lulz. Suffice to say, a combination of outrage and troll remorse turned the whole event into a clusterfuck.

{{quote|If BlueSpike really is 13 years old, then we know who the real child molesters are. [...] "hey! be one of the cool kids, help this autistic guy jack off, pretend to be a girl so we can video tape and record it..." . Thats the REAL reason you were shiting it and called for a 30 minute silence just after, Clyde. At least you had the balls to say that it was you responsible [...] If Bluespike really is 13, then you groomed a child to perform sex acts on a mentally retarded man for your pleasure. You're fucked, son. You both broke a lolcow, but theres better sport now, ruining your lives. And dont act like you dont care, I saw you shiting yourself all that night and the next, sending waves of members out to kill threads about it or put in false names, just like Your sock earlier in the page. Ready to have a seat of there?|Wit, ED user<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20100919165747/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Talk:Chris-chan/Archive14</ref>}}

Even as [[Julie Reveals Herself]] was being recorded, other trolls can be heard remarking that it was "horrible" and demanding BlueSpike to stop. Early on in [[Mumble 11]], which was recorded a day later, other trolls outright tell BlueSpike to shut up and that nobody likes him before he gets muted.

===Impact on Chris===
While one might think that this level of physical and mental abuse would leave lasting scars, BlueSpike's trolling initially appeared to have virtually '''no''' evident long-term impact on Chris. Just a few weeks after Julie revealed her true identity, Chris had moved onto thinking he'd found [[Ivy O'Neil|another sweetheart]] online, and just a few weeks after that he had no trouble believing that he was having virtual sex with [[Vanessa Hudgens|a famous Disney Channel celebrity]]. The main effect it had was that although Chris made a new Sonichu medallion, he stopped wearing it until 1 [[July 2009]].

However, years later, Chris stated that BlueSpike's psychological and sexual abuse of him was in [[June 2021 social media posts#Discussing trolls and other stuff|the top two most traumatic experiences in his life]], with the other contender being the alleged incident at [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]] where he was pinned down by faculty during an autistic meltdown. Since Chris hasn't provided details of how he felt after the humiliating experience, figuring out how this affected him is left up to speculation. He also sounded reluctant to talk about the incident during [[Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David]], a video where he attempted to dox lolcow David Harlow as being BlueSpike (due to trolls feeding him misinformation), and during the [[BraveryJerk Interviews]], he is shocked when BraveryJerk brings up the incident.

Chris came to believe that BlueSpike was killed at the hands of [[Clyde Cash]], from an offhand comment by Cash in [[Mumble 12]]. On [[Chris chan (CWCipedia)|his version of the ED page]], Chris stated that "That little S.O.B. later died at the hands of the '[[Transformers|Starscream]]' Troll, Clyde Cash." Of course, this statement was later [[Car Pranks|revealed to be a complete and utter falsehood ]]. Nonetheless, even eight years after the events of 23 August 2011, Chris [[Chris and reality|still believes]] that BlueSpike is dead.<ref>[https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:EpicOnlineBully.jpeg Chris creates a trading card mentioning 'the late BlueSpike', 22 September 2019]</ref>

==Prank Calls==
Even after tormenting Chris for several hours, and getting kicked out from his clique of trolls as a result, BlueSpike continued contact with Chris, acting as the original [[weening|ween]].

[[LoveYouLongTime E-mails, 2009#Ranking China|The first known call]] involved trolls posing as a group of girls having a sleepover, with BlueSpike voicing one of them named "Azul". There is no known recording of this call; however, Chris did consider the girls as potential sweetheart candidates, specifically singling out Azul as being "HOT".

[[Car Pranks|The second known call]] involved him trying to buy [[Son-Chu|Chris's car]], after a troll put it up on [[Craigslist]]. BlueSpike tried to trade the car for a [[HEXBox]], causing Chris to hang up.

[[Prank_calls#Failed_Prank_Call|The third known call]] involved BlueSpike and another troll calling up Chris's phone to obnoxiously yell "[[For Julie's Eyes Only|JULAYYYYY]]," taunting him about the Julie saga. Unfortunately for them, [[Bob Chandler|Bob]] answered the phone, chewing them out for the immaturity of the prank. They hung up shortly after.

=="Called out"==
On 23 [[August 2011]], [[Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David|Chris claimed]] to know BlueSpike's real identity (first name '''David''') and threatened to drop [[dox]] on him unless he made an apology video by 15 [[September 2011]]. In the video, BlueSpike was to tell people to stop calling Chris "[[Ian Brandon Anderson]]" and yelling "JULAAAAAAAAYYY!" in [[prank calls]]. Although BlueSpike did not respond to Chris' demands, the [[Death of Bob Chandler|death of Bob]] two weeks later caused Chris to leave the Internet before he could reveal BlueSpike's personal information, and he ultimately lost interest in exposing his tormentor.
<center><gallery>
File:JULAYYYYYYYY.PNG|The supposed image of BlueSpike.
File:Davidharlow.jpg|An unrelated image of David Harlow.
</gallery></center>

Even if Chris did make a video about who BlueSpike really was, it would have been for naught. The personal information Chris had actually belonged to David Harlow, a lolcow also known as [https://web.archive.org/web/20211208172212/https://encyclopediadramatica.online/Nesshelper Nesshelper]. This is evidenced by Nesshelper and BlueSpike apparently sharing the same first name, the "real" photo of BlueSpike being a closeup of [https://sonichu.com/cwcki/File:Davidharlow.jpg this picture of Nesshelper], and Chris' claim of BlueSpike liking big rooms, which references a [https://archive.org/details/43947139 video rant] where Nesshelper complained about the size of a hotel room he was staying in. Aside from not being a troll and having no reason nor motivation to go after Chris, the fact that Nesshelper sounds nothing like BlueSpike in his videos makes it clear they are not the same person (and provides further evidence of Chris's [[facial blindness]] extending to voices). Furthermore, Nesshelper was born on 9 July 1985<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20150510010346/http://nintendodojo.com/profile.aspx?id=12501</ref> and therefore would have been 23 years old during the Julie saga.

Chris was presumably given false information to highlight his [[autism|gullibility]] and possibly set up a feud between him and Nesshelper, similar to how [[Ahuviya Rotem Harel]] and [[Christopher Paul Whitney]] made negative remarks about Chris after he accused them of being [[Jack Thaddeus]] and [[Alec Benson Leary]] respectively. Of course, the aforementioned death of Bob prevented a conflict between the two from occurring; regardless, it's likely Nesshelper wasn't even aware of Chris's misguided attempt to dox him.

==Today==
{{see also|Kiwi Farms posts (Bluespike)}}
[[File:EpicOnlineBully.jpeg|thumb|Chris' "Epic Online Bully" card, based on Julie/Max]]
BlueSpike is easily one of the most polarizing trolls in Christory. Most observers tend to frown on BlueSpike and his methods, as they echo those of [[weens]], [[enablers]], and [[A-Logs]]. Nevertheless, some weens and A-Logs still yearn to return to the sadistic days of BlueSpike, in hopes of an age of trolling where physical pain is inflicted upon Chris. Since 2009, BlueSpike has come of age and matured; he now has a profile on [[Kiwi Farms]] which has been given the "Christorical Figure" verification by forum moderators.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/members/bluespike.24172/ ([https://archive.fo/l7YpW archive])</ref> When asked to reflect upon his time trolling Chris, he wrote:<ref>[[Kiwi_Farms_posts_(Bluespike)#Looking_back_on_trolling_Chris]]</ref>

{{quotebox|There's been tons of things in my life I've regretted and hated doing later on, all of the stuff from 10 years ago was one of them. I've moved past everything that happened those many years ago and obviously I'm a different person now. It wasn't funny and was a very a-log thing to do. Nothing much else I can say.}}

On August 28, 2017, BlueSpike responded to a question on his Kiwi Farms<ref>[[Kiwi_Farms_posts_(Bluespike)#Liquid Chris]]</ref> account asking if given the opportunity he would "do it all again". He responded:

{{quotebox|Probably not, if I would I'd try to do something more similar to [[Liquid Chris]] (not trying to ruin his life and just have fun with him)}}

As of September 2020, BlueSpike remains Chris's least favorite troll.<ref>[[Discord Q&A 8#Least_Favorite_Troll]]</ref>

In [[January 2024]], Chris was asked in an interview about his regrets, replying that he had fallen for "theoretical exes", his term for [[trolls]] posing as [[sweethearts]]. In particular, Chris singled out BlueSpike and his actions, further showing that BlueSpike has been cemented in Chris's mind even nearly fifteen years later.<ref>[[The Chris Chan Interview]]</ref>
===False accusations===
With BlueSpike's identity still remaining a secret, it's natural people would try to find out who was behind the persona; this has nevertheless resulted in some people being improperly tagged as BlueSpike.

A handful of people have speculated that BlueSpike may be Waymuu, a YouTube Pooper and concert archivist who, as a kid in 2009 and 2010, made A-Loggy rants towards Chris. These claims are bullshit and based entirely on rumors from [[Reddit]] and old comments on his videos and on imageboards. Waymuu was 11 in 2009, thus making it impossible for him to be BlueSpike, something confirmed by both [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yTfgGB0YeOI a video] he'd later make debunking the rumors, and by a ''Thomas the Tank Engine'' [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hw8iX5lY2kY gag dub] he made in 2011 that stated his then-age (13) in the title. While the two did have similar voices around the time, prepubescent boys tend to have similar-sounding voices in general, and Waymuu has different speech patterns and inflections in his. Furthermore, Waymuu had no other sort of involvement in the trolling of Chris outside of making said rants and lurking his [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|ED]] page.

==See also==
{{Fan art}}
*[[BlueSpike PSN Chats]]
*[[Bob Walks In]]
*[[Chris Comes Out of the Closet]]
*[[CWC Cums for a Cat]]
*[[For Julie's Eyes Only]]
*[[Idea Guys]]
*[[Julie Reveals Herself]]
*[[Molvanîa]]
*[[Mumble]] - BlueSpike would set up a Mumble chat to communicate with Sonichu "fans".
*[[Ohio trip]]

{{References}}
{{JulieSaga}}
{{PS3Saga}}
{{Love quest}}

[[Category:Sweethearts]]
[[Category:Trolls]]
[[Category:Millennial Generation]]
[[Category:Miscreants Members]]
[[Category:Julie Saga]]
[[Category:People from the United States]]

Evan E-mails

2026-06-24T21:08:04Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

{{honest}}
{{quote|Every Person is Doing it!! Aahhhhhhhh...Relief... :)|Chris [[List of Chris's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica|during his editing sessions on ED.]]}}

These are emails between Chris and [[Evan Christopher George]], including the infamous masturbatin' and squirtin' emails from [[November 2007]] and emails about [[Asperchu]] from [[March 2010]]

==Evan Sends Chris Fanart, Chris Gets Pissed==

{{quoteboxred|−−−−−Original Message−−−−− 
To: CWCSonichu@aol.com 
Sent: 3 [[November 2007]]

This is some fanart of Sonichu my friends and I have drawn. I hope you enjoy it!

[schu girlfriend auditions.jpg - An image of a happy, cartoonish Chris sitting at a table with two signs, one saying "GIRLFRIEND AUDITIONS" and the other saying "NO [[Chris and Race#Black people|DARKIES]]".]

[sonichu rule 34.PNG - A comic in which Chris whines to Sonichu about not having a girlfriend. Sonichu feels sad for Chris, and gives Chris a peck on the cheek. Chris is shocked, but Sonichu hushes Chris and says, "We need this." In the last panel, Sonichu is fucking Chris in the ass, the latter excited beyond belief about finally losing his virginity and soon getting to brag about it on [[YouTube]].]

[sonichu rule 34 2.jpg - A picture of Sonichu masturbating while saying "NO DARKIES, JERKOP!". Credits are listed as 'Bui Anon, © Anon 2007']

[sonichu fanart.gif - Chris and another [http://encyclopediadramatica.online/Blazesonic Sonic-Pikachu hybrid] waving their fists and [[The Creepy Stare|glaring at each other]].]}}

{{quotebox|
CWCSonichu to [Evan]

Thank you for your fanart contributions. In constructive criticism, I like the one with me and the "Girlfriend Auditions," as well as [[Stare|my glaring]] in the eyes of the blue guy.

But I AM FEELING GREAT DETEST TOWARDS THE OTHER TWO; Sonichu and I are NOT of that nature at all!!!!! If you would like to make it up to me, though, please draw a strip of Rosechu stripping for Sonichu, and have him f*** her, and draw Rosechu '''masturbating and squirtin'''' [emphasis added].

[[Homo|I AM STRAIGHT, DAMN IT!!!!]] I WILL NOT BE VEERED IN ANY OTHER DISGUSTINGLY GROTESQUE DIRECTION!!!!

Again, MOST Nasty Fanarts ARE NOT APPRECIATED AT ALL; please feel free to share that quote with the rest of the fans.

Sincerely;
Christian Weston Chandler.

[Chris included a picture in the email of himself and Sonichu looking angry. Sonichu appears to be waving his hand awkwardly.]

We're Keeping Track.}}

{{quoteboxred|
I'm very sorry I disappointed you, Chris-Chan. I drew what you wished.

[Evan included a comic featuring [[Rosechu]] with a giant squirtin' penis.]}}

{{quoteboxred|
Oh, and here's more art from more of my friends. I didn't draw any of this stuff, though, so if you don't like it, I have no guilt!

[Evan included four drawings, including depictions of more Rosechu penis and a naked [[Mary Lee Walsh]]].}}

{{quoteboxred|
Alright, I have one last batch of fanart! I'm sorry to send so many to you, but my friends are really eager to share it all. I hope you enjoy!

[Evan appended five more drawings, with more dickgirl Rosechu and a parody of [[The Oversized Drinking Straw of Fail]]].}}

{{quotebox|
CWCSonichu to [Evan]

Thank You Very MUCH!!! You just saved me a lot of trouble on sorting out the pics from the hellish embelishment of my person that I am certain you are in on.

[Chris included a link to the "Chris-chan" page on ED]}}

{{quoteboxred|
[Evan] to CWCSonichu

What! What a horrible page. I'm sorry!

I must wonder how they got pictures of our e-mails! I hope no one's hacking my e-mail account...}}

{{quotebox|
"CWCSonichu@aol.com" to [Evan]

Do me a favor, draw a VAGINA on my Rosechu; Rosechu IS A GIRL; SHE NEVER HAD A FREAKIN' [[Pickle|PICKLE]]!!!! IF I SEE ONE MORE FREAKIN' PICKLE, AND YOU MAY SPREAD THIS QUOTE TO OTHER ADULT FAN ARTISTS, I WILL CREATE '''YOU''' IN [[Soul Calibur|SOUL CALIBUR]] III AND [[Death threats|BEAT]] '''[[Death threats|YOU]]''' [[Death threats|UP]] LIKE THERE'S NO TOMORROW!!!}}

{{quoteboxred|
Uh oh.

[This came with a drawing of Rosechu holding a pickle and saying, "I wish pickles could masturbate and squirt." Cartoon Evan replies, "Fudge, you're going to beat me up in SC now, aren't you? I shouldn't have let our souls get fiercely entangled."]}}

===Gallery===
<center><gallery>
Image:Chrisreply1evan.png|Evan's original email and Chris's reply.
File:Detailsonichurule34.png|A larger view of Evan's second comic.
File:SonchuRosechuzappinandsquirtin.png|Evan's response to Chris's request.
File:Chrischan reply 3.JPG|More fanart.
File:Chrischan reply 4 jpeg.jpg|The last batch of fanart.
Image:Chrisreplyevan2.PNG
Image:Chrisreply3.PNG
File:Chrischan reply 7.PNG|Evan's eventual response to the whole issue.
</gallery></center>

==Chris Drilled Out Evan's Dick==

{{quoteboxred|−−−−−Original Message−−−−− 
From: Evang7 
To: chrischansonic 
Sent: 11:50 PM (3 [[March 2010]]) 
Subject: Where's MY apology?

YOU DRILLED OUT MY DICK

You have wronged me more than you have wronged Alec, and we both know it. You steal from me and still refuse to admit that Simonla is a ripoff.

I am PLEASED with Simonla's death, but YOU DRILLED OUT MY DICK. Are you JEALOUS of my penis, and the fact that I have recieved VAGINAL RELATIONS with it? Why would you DRILL MY DICK OUT?? And have a FOURTH GRADER do it to me? Do you even realize how SICK that is? Making a little girl commit murder??}}

{{quotebox|Firstly, I apologize for portraying your execution; the pages will be changed within a few days. Second, As I have made it clear in the past, I don't get along well with most male persons, and there ARE those with dicks longer than 7 inches; yes I am jealous of those individuals, not just you. Third, Accept it Face-Value; YOU GOT YOUR WISH, Simonla is dead. Let's agree that your wish has been satisfied and move on.

Have a good day,
Christian W. Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|Thanks for cooperating and all, I'm just very weirded out by the fact that not only did you have to kill me, you had to castrate me. Like, isn't that a BIT overboard? Making a fourth grader drill out some dude's penis is a bit extreme. How do you think Sandy felt about it?

I'm sorry for pressing you on the subject, I just find it really odd that you had to go to that sort of length. It's a little hypocritical too, you whine at Alec for having Metal Asperchu set you on fire but then it's okay for you to have Sandy drill out my genitals?

I do appreciate that Simonla is dead and I'd like to move on, it's just frankly sort of disturbing that you castrated me. I wouldve been fine with just dying, you can leave in me getting executed if you want. But my penis? Really? Just because you're redoing it doesn't undo the past! And you seem to think it's fine that you made a fourth grader do it!

I just want an answer, I'm not going to make you kill anyone else anymore. It's just weird to me. Sort of disturbing. Would you cut off the dicks of every other man in the world if you could?}}

{{quotebox|To answer your question... no I would not. Again that was portrayed out of rage. And Sandy was enraged against you for killing her mother; would you not be that super angry towards the killer of your own mother, if that was the case, God forbid?}}

===Gallery===
<center>
<gallery>
File:Evan responds to his death.png|Evan calls Chris out on death by genital mutilation.
File:Evan responds to his death2.png|More explanation why kids drill dicks
</gallery>
</center>

==See also==
* [[4-cent_garbage.com]]
* [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]
* [[Evan]]
* [[Mass debating]]

==External links==
* [https://web.archive.org/web/20080512213951/http://4chanarchive.org/brchive/dspl_thread.php5?thread_id=7656940&x=sonichu+response 4chan's response to the correspondence.]

{{Emails}}

[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:E-mails]]

2007

2026-06-24T21:08:02Z

FromtheWordsofBR: /* November */

{{Honest}}

[[Image:0940-CWCsAppreaciation.JPG|thumb|Chris in '''2007'''.]]
[[Image:S2007.JPG|thumb|Graph showing the Google-popularity of the terms ''Sonichu'' (blue) and ''Christian Weston Chandler'' (red). 2007 is marked in [[Yellow Is a Mellow Color|Mellow Yellow]].]]
[[Image:ShecameforCWC (200803).JPG|thumb|On '''11 November 2007''', Chris felt uploading a [[She Came for CWC|drawing of him fingering]] [[Megan Schroeder|his best friend]] was the best way to protest the creation of his [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|ED]] page.]]
[[Image:063-2-CWCDVDWholeMaster.jpg|thumb|On '''11 February 2007''', Chris made a [[DVD]] about himself.]]
[[Image:SoulCalibur3box.jpg|thumb| On '''8 May 2007''', [[Mary Lee Walsh]] gets it in ''[[Soul Calibur]] III''.]]
[[Image:CWCinDailyProgressJuly142007.jpg|thumb|'''July 2007''']]
[[File:CreepyBobAndChris.JPG|thumb|On '''4 September 2007''', [[Bob Chandler|Bob]] turned 80.]]
[[Image:Chrischannov2007.jpg|thumb|On '''26 October 2007''', this picture is taken at [[The GAMe PLACe]].]]
[[Image:MaryWantsIt.JPG|thumb|One of the images Chris drew on '''11 November 2007'''.]]

'''2007''': '''the year we made contact'''.

The second half of the year 2007 shows some important developments within [[Christian Weston Chandler]]'s life.

Firstly, Chris enters and loses the [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|''PaRappa the Rapper'' contest]], leaving him disillusioned and enraged.

Secondly, he discovers a satirical page written about him on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]. These two injustices lead Chris into a bitter, long and frustrated [[rage]], eventually giving spark to certain deep, complex and mysterious aspects of madness within his person, that, when revealed, would prove to be a decisive factor leading to obsessive [[troll]]ing in [[2008]].

==Events of 2007==

===February===
* '''11 February''' - Chris makes the cover for his [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|"Yep, I'm on TV" DVD]].
* '''19 February''' - Chris starts making the slideshow for his DVD.
* '''21 February''' - Chris sends [[Chris emails 2007#February|an email]] to [[Virginia Jeanine Sanford|Ms. Sanford]], his middle school teacher, telling her about how his life has been.
* '''22 February''' - Chris finishes the slideshow.
* '''24 February'''
** Chris's 25th [[birthday]]. A party is thrown at what appears to be [[The GAMe PLACe]].
** Chris releases his [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|"future message"]].

===March===
* '''4 March''' - Chris sends an email to his half-brother [[Cole]] in an attempt to reconnect with him. He asks if he'd like a copy of his new [[DVD]].
* '''5 March'''
** Chris draws the cover of [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]].
** Chris apologizes to [[Megan]] for criticizing her story ideas.
* '''6 March'''
** Megan tells Chris not to draw her animal characters with breasts.
** In response to an email from Chris about the DVD, [[Cole Smithey]] expresses his history with and disdain for [[Barbara]] and [[Bob]].
** Chris cashes in his first [[My Coke Rewards]] points, beginning a campaign that will see him consume more than 2,500 bottles worth of Coke.
* '''10 March''' - Chris buys the Officer Nasty Fantasy Doll and "The Best of Amateur Angels".
* '''17 March''' - Chris realizes that he is able to afford a 60GB PlayStation 3, so he goes out and invests in one.
* '''18 March''' - Chris bids on a used copy of ''Mortal Kombat Advance'' (for the Game Boy Advance) on eBay.
* '''26 March''' - Chris [[PSN blogs#29 March 2007 21:57 — A Few Playstation 3 Thoughts.|posts some complaints]] about the [[PS3]] on his PSN blogs.
* '''29 March''' - Chris makes a few more posts to his PSN blogs, leaving some of the same complaints he did on the 26th.

===April===
* '''24 April''' - ''[[Pokémon]] Diamond'' and ''Pearl'' are released in the US.
* '''26 April''' - Chris posts to his [[PSN Blogs]], claiming he is looking forward to the [[Adult Swim]] games featuring the [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force]] and [[Harvey Birdman]].
* '''30 April''' - [[Megan]] tells Chris for the umpteenth time to stop touching her, and says she is only a little annoyed.

===May===
* '''1 May''' - Chris creates a [[Soul Calibur#Chris vs Mary Lee Walsh|video]] of himself beating up [[Mary Lee Walsh]] in ''[[Soul Calibur]] III''.
* '''7 May''' - Chris tells [[Megan]] he's also created a video depicting her fighting in ''Soul Calibur''.
* '''8 May''' - Christian creates his first [[YouTube]] account and uploads his Mary Lee Walsh ''Soul Calibur'' video.

===June===
* '''June''' - Chris stops working as a volunteer assistant Gym Leader at [[The GAMe PLACe]].
* '''4 June''' - [[Megan]] tells Chris about her infatuation with a video game character.
* '''6 June'''
** Megan leaves for Kentucky.
** Ran Coleman Yeatts, Cole's biological father, dies.
* '''15 June''' - Chris makes a few posts to his [[PSN Blogs]], complaining about internet issues with ''Go Puzzle'', and announcing he has found a way to play ''[[Guitar Hero]]'' on the [[PS3]].
* '''27 June'''
** Chris states that he is saddened, as Megan has left for Kentucky. He misses her.
** Chris cries with his [[Barb|mother]] whilst thinking of his late dog [[Patti]].
* '''28 June''' - Chris sends another email to [[Megan]] discussing Patti and video games.
* '''29 June''' - Chris makes his ''PaRappa the Rapper'' video and enters [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown]].

===July===
* '''3 July''' - Chris sends another email to [[Megan]] in which he chats about his activities at [[The Game Place]] and says he misses her.
* '''4 July''' - Chris sees Michael Bay's ''[[Transformers]]'' movie with his [[mother]].
* '''6 July''' - Chris fills in Megan about new ''[[Soul Calibur]]'' cards and says he misses her.
* '''7 July''' - Christian buys a Velvet Touch masturbator, a Silicone Superstud Power Ring and a Titanium 5-Star Video Collection.
* '''11 July''' - Chris again writes to Megan to discuss video games.
* '''14 July''' - Chris goes to a rummage sale with his [[mother]] and tells [[Megan]] all about it. He gets featured in his local newspaper, the ''[[Chris in the media#Daily Progress|Daily Progress]]''.
* '''15 July''' - Chris tells Megan about a [[Spanish]] soap opera he bought with his My Coke Rewards points, and problems with his ear.
* '''16 July''' - Chris buys himself an [[Officer Nasty]] Love Doll (in contrast to the Fantasy Doll bought in March), A&E Hot Action Lotion in Strawberry, "Carmen & Friends", "The Perfect Secretary" and a "Wicked Hot Pics Photo CD".
* '''18 July''' - Chris hears his PaRappa video has made it to the final rounds. He is overjoyed. He emails Megan that he wants her to accompany him to Seattle if he wins.
* '''20 July'''
** Chris sends [[Chris emails 2007#July|an email]] to Susan Hannifan, a counselor at [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]], telling her to vote for him in the PaRappa contest.
** Chris also sends an email to [[Cole]] requesting his vote as well.
* '''21 July'''
** Cole responds to Chris with more hostility towards their parents. Chris tries flattery to persuade Cole to vote for him in the contest.
** Chris updates [[CWC's Pokésite 2|El PokéSite de RWC 2]] and "CWC's Vroom-A-Zoom!," his [[Hot Wheels]] site, to tell people to vote for him in the PaRappa contest.
** Someone leaves a cryptic negative comment on Chris's [[MySpace]] page.
* '''22 July''' - [[Anna]] tells Chris she voted for his PaRappa video and wishes him good luck.
* '''23 July'''
** Megan's 21st birthday. She is still in Kentucky, and Chris misses her.
** Susan Hannifan responds to Chris's email and says she will vote for him in the contest.
** Chris makes a post to the [[PSN Blogs]], urging people to vote for him in the PaRappa contest.
** Cole tells Chris that he'll vote for him if he can find out the name of his real father. Chris responds that according to their mother, it's Jack Dale Smithey.
* '''24 July''' - Cole tells Chris that their mother is lying about the name of his biological father, and asks Chris to tell him when "that fuck Bob finally drops."
* '''28 July''' - Chris fills Megan in about his activities at [[The Game Place]] and again shares his fantasy about going to Seattle with her.
* '''31 July''' - The polls for the PaRappa contest close. Chris makes several posts to the [[PSN Blogs]], urging people to vote before the polls close, and wording his anxiousness.

===August===
* '''1 August''' - Chris makes a few posts to the [[PSN Blogs]], talking about PS3 and his wish to be able to understand Japanese.
* '''2 August''' - Chris updates [[CWC's Pokésite 2]].
* '''3 August'''
** [[Adam Stackhouse]] wins the PaRappa the Rapper Contest. Christian, to put it mildly, is not happy.
** Christian immediately sends an enraged e-mail to [[Sony]]. He is furious because he didn't get the opportunity to impress Megan.
** In an e-mail to Megan, Christian admits to cheating to win the PaRappa the Rapper Contest.
* '''4 August'''
** Christian writes another angry letter to Sony, explaining why the other contestants should be disqualified.
** Chris curses Adam Stackhouse in his [[PSN Blogs#4 August 2007 — Adam Stackhouse!!!|PSN blog]], which results in an admin serving him with a (probably one month) ban.
* '''5 August''' - Chris informs Megan that he has complained to Sony about the rule violations by Adam Stackhouse and other contestants.
* '''6 August''' - Chris updates [[CWC's Sonichu Site!]]
* '''7 August''' - Chris apologizes to Megan for supposedly calling her his girlfriend in the PaRappa Contest, and professes his love for her.
* '''8 August'''
** Megan sends Christian an angry letter, complaining about his clingy behavior, and that she is happy he lost the contest as she didn't want to go on a trip with somebody who wouldn't stop touching her. She says that they can either remain solely as friends, or never see each other again. According to Chris: "It hurt so fucking much, it took me weeks to recover."
** Christian apologizes to Megan for his behavior.
** Chris sends yet another e-mail to Sony, apologizing for his anger, but still thinks he has won.
* '''10 August''' - Sony responds to Christian's e-mail. They don't take him seriously.
* '''Sometime between August 3 to possibly August 10''' - Chris uploads [[CWC is Angry]].
* '''13 August''' - Christian writes to Megan about having confessed his love to her.
* '''15 August''' - Chris bids on a Megatron Leader Class action figure on eBay.
* '''20 August''' - Chris buys himself another Officer Nasty love doll, possibly because his other one suffered an internal injury. He also purchases a "Mystery Feature", "Redlight Girls", "Extreme Behavior 2", and "Signature Series 10: Shayla LaVeaux".
* '''31 August''' - Chris tells Megan he will resume his Love Quest in September.

===September===
* '''4 September'''
** [[Bob]]'s 80th birthday. Chris makes him a cake.
** On the [[PSN Blogs]], Chris complains about not being able to go online.
* '''5 September''' - On the [[PSN Blogs]], Chris replies to a blog concerning login problems.
* '''12 September''' - On the [[PSN Blogs]], Chris talks about [[PSP]] update 3.7. He also talks about his login problems.
* '''17 September''' - [[Caden Peck]] turns 5.
* '''22 September''' - Chris posts a message entitled, "I WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS INJUSTICE!!!!" on his [[MySpace]] Sonichu Group.
* '''27 September''' - On the [[PSN Blogs]], Chris makes a few posts, one asking if he can use a [[HEXBox]] controller on a PS3.

===October===
* '''1 October'''
** Megan says that she is glad that Chris has backed off from his advances. Chris replies that he still pines for her.
** [[Barb]] turns 66.
* '''2 October''' - Chris is confronted by a [[jerkop]] at [[Alderman Library]].
* '''3 October''' - Christian buys a LAI MI Asian sex doll.
* '''4 October''' - Chris emails Megan, saying that he intends to keep going to Alderman Library for his [[sweetheart search]].
* '''19 October''' - Christian shows hostile behavior towards a friend of Megan.
* '''20 October''' - Christian apologizes to Megan for his hostile behavior. He blames it on his homophobia.
* '''21 October''' - Megan is annoyed with his behavior and tells him he should mind his own business.
* '''26 October''' The day that the trolling of Chris began. He is photographed at the Game Place playing ''[[Pokémon]]''. The same day, he gets [http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2636398&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=8#post335082042 mentioned] in a [[Something Awful]] thread (Requires ''Archives'' account to view), originally about fellow lolcow Ulillillia, by a student at the [[University of Virginia]] who saw Chris at Alderman Library that day looking for a boyfriend-free girl.
* '''27 October''' - Due to the Ulillillia thread getting derailed, a [http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2667671 thread on SomethingAwful] is created about Chris, titled "Sonichu and his [[Love Quest|quest]] for a [[boyfriend-free girl]]". (Requires ''Archives'' account to view, [http://web.archive.org/web/20071107074539/http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2667671&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=1 mirror].)
* '''30 October''' - Some guy asks Chris how he's doing in a [[MySpace]] comment.
* '''31 October'''
** The SomethingAwful Sycophant Squad (SASS) creates a thread on Chris titled ''Sonichuuuuuuuu...''
** According to Chris, the [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page is created. (According to the history, it was created a few days later).
** On the [[PSN Blogs]], Chris asks a question about [[God of War]].
** A troll posing as [[PaRappa the Rapper]] pokes fun at Chris in a MySpace comment.

===November===
* '''1 November''' - "PaRappa" and another troll mock Chris in MySpace comments.
* '''2 November''' - According to Chris, on this day he discovers the [[ED]] page and becomes furious. This is contradicted by the date of the page's creation.
* '''3 November'''
** The Chris-Chan article on ED is created at 5:45 PM (Ruckersville time) by [[Jason Kendrick Howell]].
** [[Evan]] collects some of the best images from [[4chan]]'s Fan-Art thread and e-mails them to Chris.
** Chris emails [[Megan]] that he was freaked out by Evan's fanart, and that he's informed a [[deviantArt]] member about [[Chris and copyright|copyright violation]].
** Chris himself seemingly appears on 4chan to state he will send e-mails to trolls who violate his ''Sonichu'' copyright, also posting [[:File:116-CWCCop.jpg]] in the process.<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20080413062411/http://4chanarchive.org:80/brchive/dspl_thread.php5?thread_id=7631380] (posts 7631457 and 7631543)</ref>
* '''4 November'''
** Chris discovers the ED page made about him, and angrily e-mails a link of the "hellish embelishment [sic] of [his] person" to [[Evan]]. He then demands that Evan draw a picture of [[Rosechu]] "[[masturbating and squirtin']]".
** [[Vivian Gee]] [[Vivian Gee E-mails, 2007-2008|sends her first email]] to Chris, telling him that she has a similar but not identical character to Sonichu, and would appreciate it if Chris said it was original.
** Chris updates [[CWC's Sonichu Site!]]
** Chris uploads his [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|FUTURE MESSAGE]] to [[YouTube]].
* '''5 November'''
** A [[white knight]] tells Chris via e-mail that people at [[4chan]]'s /v/ board are making fun of him, and that they have made an [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page for Chris.
** Chris tells Barbara that he had been photographed at the [[Game Place]], and she goes mad.
** In e-mails to [[Anna]], Chris tells her that he's discovered his [[ED]] page. He also discloses that he has been chatting with [[Lori Lopez]], a fake [[sweetheart]] created by Christian's old friend [[Joshua Martinez]].
* '''6 November'''
** Somebody sends an e-mail to Chris, claiming that Chris has stolen his [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] character, and that Chris must take down his Sonichu comics in one week or face charges. Chris ignores the e-mail.
** Vivian responds to Chris about her earlier e-mail by ranting about how he is the one that makes his life suck. She ends by telling him to fuck off and die.
** Chris uploads five more old videos to his [[YouTube]] channel.
* '''7 November'''
** Christian shoots a [[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007|video]] diplomatically asking to have the ED article edited to "better reflect his personality".
** Vivian sends one last e-mail to Chris for a long time, asking him to throw away his [[medallion]].
* '''8 November''' - A YouTube user named [https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXHE3ZryQbuJpSgGuHKr74Q DrKelexo] publishes a {{w|YouTube Poop|YTP}} of [[Pixelated PS3|one of Chris's videos]], titled "Christian Warden Chandler Talks About The PSTriple".<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20180903075210/https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k0mpzLphLlM</ref> To date, this marks the earliest known video posted to YouTube that features Chris (aside from Chris's own uploads).
* '''9 November''' - [[Barbara]] goes to the Game Place and questions manager [[Michael (Game Place)|Michael]] about the picture that was taken. She asks to be offered a seat, but as there is no seat, she has to sit on the floor. Michael tells Chris that if he brings up ED once again, he will be banned from the store.<ref>[[Megan_Emails,_2008#Chris_emails_her_some_detective_work.2C_Megan_likely_doesn.27t_give_a_shit|Megan Emails, 2008]]</ref>
* '''10 November''' - A picture of [[Wikipedia:goatse.cx|Goatse]] is added to the ED page, and Christian finally breaks down and creates the Reldnahc account to remove it. He then begins [[List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica#November_2007|rewriting the article]] in a more favorable light towards him.
* '''11 November''' - In response to she-male and homoerotic Sonichu fan art on the ED page, Chris draws five [[Rule 34]] drawings and adds them to the article in protest. Most feature his Sonichu characters; [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|one in particular]] depicts himself fingering a woman who is later identified as Megan.
* '''12 November''' - Chris adds entries from his [[CWC's Diary|diary]], details about how he lost Megan, and information about his sex doll [[Officer Nasty]] to the ED page. By now Chris has willingly provided 90% of the information that will be used to mock him henceforth.
* '''14 November''' - Chris updates his Sonichu site.
* '''15 November''' - Christian tries to hack ED using HTML. It doesn't work.
* '''17 November''' - A YouTube channel named [https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCmi82tEQ-2sqx_ZY_R7x2Qg TheDailyPOS] (likely related to DrKelexo in some way, and [https://web.archive.org/web/20071231050726/https://thedailypos.org/ a small web forum of the same name] which is linked in DrKelexo's channel description) is created and publishes two videos about Chris, "[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VEegHTmVxf4 CWC Mayhem - Intro]" and "[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Go13DOUruQ CWC Mayhem - Outro]", the second one being an edited mock trailer compilation of some of Chris's videos.
* '''18 November''' - Chris emails Megan about activities at [[The Game Place]] and sends her a picture of [[Lori Lopez]].
* '''19 November''' - Chris tells Megan that he'll be meeting Lori soon.
* '''23 November''' - Chris buys a 160 GB SATA hard drive for his PS3, greatly increasing its storage space.
* '''30 November''' - Megan asks Chris for help obtaining some German music.

===December===
* '''18 December''' - Chris sends Megan a reminder about their get-together tomorrow at [[The End Games]].
* '''26 December''' - Chris buys [[Kimmi]], the anime love doll, on Adamandeve.com, probably because his parents didn't buy it for him as a Christmas gift.
* '''28 December''' - Once again, Chris returns to [[List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica#December_2007|editing]] the text of his ED article into a more positive one.
* '''30 December'''
** With a new ED account, "Chris-Chan", Chris starts vandalizing ED.
** Christian writes the poem [[For My True Love, I Would…]]
* '''31 December''' - Chris sends his recently completed poem to somebody in contact with Megan, and tells her to send it to her.

==References==
<references />

{{Timeline}}

[[Category:2007| ]]
[[Category:Chronology]]

Hooker incident

2026-06-24T00:49:28Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

:''This article is about the time prostitutes were sent to Chris' house by trolls. For the time Chris visited a hooker, see [[Mia Hamm]]''.

The '''hooker incident''' was an act of trolling in which [[Bryan Bash]] sent a gaggle of [[boyfriend-free girl|boyfriend-free]] [[Carlos Chantor|prostitutes]] to [[14 Branchland Court]] on 19 [[March 2009]] so Chris would no longer need to be a [[virgin with rage]].

==Background==
After Chris's failed [[date with Emily]] was ambushed by the [[Man in the Pickle Suit]] on 19 March, Chris came home only to find that a mysterious benefactor had provided him with a group of "escorts" to help him divest himself of his virginity. Chris was unamused, and so were his parents; his father [[Bob Chandler|Bob]] called the [[jerkop|police]].<ref>[[Ivy Q&A#After Emily]]</ref><ref>[[Jackie E-mails#Chris's only friends: trolls and his parents]]</ref>

Shortly after they were turned in, Chris had a phone call with [[Emily]], where she criticized him for constantly touching her during their date, as well as his behavior towards the [[Man in the Pickle Suit]]. [[Clyde Cash]] showed up near the end, and later called Chris again, taking responsibility for the escorts. [[Barbara Chandler|His mother]] joined in on the call, and she demanded Clyde (and Bryan) stop harassing them.

==Post-date call==
{{Infobox/Audiofile
| name = Post-Date Conversation
| audio = {{#ev:youtube|mErqFLo1A7U}}
| Stardate = 19 March 2009
| Featuring = [[Chris]]; [[Emily]]; [[Clyde Cash]]
| Subject = [[Date with Emily]]
| Saga = {{Emily|text}}, {{Clyde|text}}
}}

'''Clyde:''' Sorry.
 '''Chris:''' What's up?
 '''Emily:''' I think we need to talk.
 '''Chris:''' Okay.
 '''Emily:''' Becau— It's not me, Chris. It's you. And, you know, I was just thinking about yesterday. I really didn't appreciate you, like, [[Megan|touching]] me all the time.
 '''Chris:''' I'm sorry, what?
 '''Emily:''' I di— I didn't appreciate you, like, constantly touching me, okay? You'd, like, just met me, and you were touching me constantly.
 '''Chris:''' Oh. I'm sorry.
 '''Emily:''' [''interrupting''] I mean, you should never do that to a woman on, like, you know, one that you just met. And especially when you try, like... You tried to kiss me, okay? That's not right at all.
 '''Chris:''' I'm so sorry, I was a little nervous. I was nervous, a little bit.
 '''Emily:''' Why would you try to kiss somebody when— If you're nervous? I mean, I thought, like, people would be nervous and ''not'' try to kiss somebody.
 '''Chris:''' I don't—
 '''Emily:''' But anyways. Let me tell you about—
 '''Chris:''' Anyway.
 '''Emily:''' You'll probably ne— You'll probably never hear from me again, Chris, because The Pickle Man was just— He was a perfect gentleman, okay? He, like, took me out on a date and paid for my movie, and, like, since he kept his hands off of me, he got, like, a little extra ''extra'' from me, and that could have been you, Chris. Okay? So— And then he took me to meet Clyde, and Clyde's, like, a perfect gentleman as well. So, I'm going to be living in his mansion from now on.
 '''Chris:''' Hmm... Anyway, did you get back to West Virginia okay?
 '''Emily:''' Yeah. Well, I didn't exactly go back to West Virginia; I'm going to be living with Clyde now, with, uh, with [[Julie]], and [[Blanca]], and [[PandaHalo|Sarah]], and everyone else, Chris. Do you understand?
 '''Chris:''' I see.
 '''Emily:''' Like, like, since... You don't understand, like, all the women that you've mistreated in the past, they're living with Clyde because he is rehabilitating them.
 '''Chris:''' Hmm... I see... [''pause''] Well, I don't know what to say.
 '''Emily:''' So, do you have anything else to say?
 '''Chris:''' Umm... Well, this is the, uh... Well, uh, all I can say is, uh, I’m sorry about if you feel— If you feel— If I— That if I mistreated you, and, uh, somewhat, if you— If you felt like I, uh, did wrong.
 '''Emily:''' Because I don't know why— Why you have, like against, like, these men in the...pickle suits or whatever. Because he was just a guy in a pickle suit. I don’t understand, like, what was so, like, threatening about him. And apparently, you, like, called the cops on him? I mean, what did he do wrong? How you gotta report him? Saying that, like, a guy in a pickle suit's, like, stole your date.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, well, I think in the past, uh, there, uh, yeah, Guy in The Pickle Suit posed as, uh, Blanca.
 '''Emily:''' But, I mean—
 '''Chris:''' And, uh...
 '''Emily:''' You, like, didn’t know this guy, and you’re already passing judgment on him, and you’re already, like… You passed judgment on thi— On Clyde, okay? Clyde’s like, the nicest guy ever, okay? He is, like… He is gonna be, like, taking care of me for the rest of the li— Rest of my life. ‘Cause he is loaded with cash.
 '''Chris:''' Hmm...
 '''Emily:''' Hence why his last name is "Cash".
 '''Chris:''' I see. Well, anyway, uh, if that’s what you want, uh, I can’t, uh, force you or anyth— Or anything else. So, uh—
 '''Emily:''' But, Chris, you should be careful [''Chris overlapping, indistinct'']. But you should be careful, Chris, on, like, all the women that you encounter, you better make sure that you treat them properly, do not touch them on the first date; [[Women's rights|don’t try to fucking kiss them]], and, you know, you’ll have no problems, but if you do, you know, the pickle men will come and take them away, and take them to Clyde, and he is gonna take care of them for the rest of their lives as well.
 '''Chris:''' I see. Alright. Okay. Alright, well, you— You take care of yourself.
 '''Clyde:''' Hey, why don't you take care of yourself, too, Chris, okay?
 '''Chris:''' Uh, yeah. Okay. Bye-bye.

==Clyde call==
{{Infobox/Audiofile
| name = The Aftermath of the Hooker Incident
| audio = {{#ev:youtube|qBjuoPpkWi4}}
| Stardate = 19 March 2009
| Featuring = [[Chris]]; [[Clyde Cash]]; [[Bryan Bash]]; [[Barbara Chandler]]
| Subject = The Hooker Incident
| Saga = {{Emily|text}}, {{Clyde|text}}
}}

 '''Clyde:''' [''fake-sounding accent''] This call is being recorded. [''phone ringing'']
 '''Chris:''' Uh, hello?
 '''Clyde:''' Hey, Chris. It’s me. Clyde. You seemed a little hasty at the end, there. I just want to talk to you.
 '''Chris:''' Uh, who is this?
 '''Clyde:''' It's Clyde.
 '''Chris:''' Oh, I see.
 '''Clyde:''' You want to say "hi" to Emily? She’s still here. Anyway, I just wondered, like, uh, I was trying to help you with your virgin problem, and I sent over some ''fine'' ladies over to your house. How, how’d that work out for you?
 '''Chris:''' Oh, so you were the one who sent them over, huh? Well, for your information, uh, my family, uh, was very uncomfortable with them being, being sent over, and, uh, they re—, and they reported them to the [[Jerkop|police]], and they got turned in, and, uh...yeah, we did not appreciate that.
 '''Clyde:''' Uh, Chris, you claim to be a virgin with rage all the time. I’m trying to help you, man.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, well, sending over prostitutes is not exactly the way of helping somebody find [[Sweetheart from the ground up|true love]].
 '''Clyde:''' [[Chris and sex|Sex]] is not true love, Chris.
 '''Chris:''' [''sigh'']
 '''Bob:''' [''prompting Chris''] Keep his nose out of our business.
 '''Chris:''' Yeah, you still there, Clyde?
 '''Clyde:''' Yeah.
 '''Chris:''' [''[[Barbara Chandler|Barbara]] prompting him, indistinct''] Yeah, keep your nose out of our business, Clyde.
 '''Clyde:''' Look, I worry for your family and everybody, okay? I’m trying to look out for the best of you, Chris. There are much more [[JERKS|evil men]] in this world.
 '''Barbara:''' I don't know who you think you are.
 '''Clyde:''' Hello?
 '''Barbara:''' I said I don't know who you think you are.
 '''Clyde:''' Chris, your voice changed.
 '''Barbara:''' But I’m telling you to both, uh, uh, t-, to cease bothering us, okay?
 '''Clyde:''' Chris, your voice changed.
 '''Barbara:''' [''overlapping''] Otherwise, yer butt’s gonna be in trouble. Yer butt’s gonna be in trouble.
 '''Bryan Bash:''' [[Random-access humor|Is your refrigerator running?]]
 '''Barbara:''' Back off!
 '''Bryan Bash:''' Uoahh!
 '''Barbara:''' Don't call us any more. Goodbye!
 '''Bryan Bash:''' No, [''unintelligible''] Use the Poké Flute<ref>The [http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Poké_Flute Poké Flute] is an item used in ''[[Pokémon]]'' games to wake up a [[Snorlax]]</ref>, quick!
 '''Clyde:''' Okay! [''inarticulate yell'']

==Return to hookers?==
In [[July 2010]], Chris expressed interest in hiring prostitutes of his own accord, posting on the [[CWCki]] under the guise of [[JenkinsJinkies]]:

{{Quote|Something else that has piqued my curiousity [sic], from the Hooker incident, I'm wondering from which luscious company or group Bryan Bash the ladies came from, specifically the company name, their website, and from within Chris's crappy (434) A.C. Because if they were out-of-his-state, I may give them a call myself. >:D|"[[JenkinsJinkies]]"<ref>[[User talk:JenkinsJinkies]]</ref>}}

On 12 [[April 2012]], a leaked [[Facebook]] post revealed that Chris had lost [[Virgin with rage|his virginity]]. The post made suggestions - later confirmed - that Chris had indeed hired a [[Mia Hamm|hooker]].

== See Also ==
* [[Chris and sex]]
* [[Mia Hamm]] - hooker who Chris would later have sex with
* [[Carlos Chantor]] - Chris as the hooker
* [[Stephanie Bustcakes]] - Chris as the hooker (again)

== Sources ==
<references/>
{{EmilySaga}}
{{FanChats}}
[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Phone calls]]
[[Category:Emily Saga]]

Category:Financhu Crisis

2026-06-22T19:28:16Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

A period of time where Chris and his mother suffered from (self-inflicted) money problems.

[[Category:2010s]]
[[Category:2020s]]
[[Category:Sagas]]

Category:Doopie Saga

2026-06-22T19:22:24Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

Chris tries ''desperately'' to strong-arm an artist into becoming his new sweetheart, and fails miserably.

[[Category:2017]]
[[Category:Sagas]]

Category:Jail Saga

2026-06-22T06:50:25Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

Chris gets [[Jail Saga|arrested]] for [[Affair with Mother|fucking his mom]] and disappears from the public eye for almost two years.

[[Category:2020s]]
[[Category:Sagas]]

Category:Stackhouse Saga

2026-06-22T06:49:56Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

Chris acts like a sore loser after losing a [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|contest he cheated in]], unintentionally setting in motion the events that led to his infamy.

[[Category:2007]]
[[Category:Sagas]]

Greene County

2026-06-21T03:29:43Z

FromtheWordsofBR: Removed redirect to Chris's education#Greene County Primary School

{{dab}}
'''Greene County''' is a county in [[Virginia]] where [[Chris]] used to live for many years, and where [[Barbara Chandler|his mother]] currently resides. It may refer to:
* [[Ruckersville, VA|Ruckersville]], a census-designated place in Greene County where Chris resided for much of his life.
* [[Greene County Conspiracy]], a video where Chris blamed his county's school system for ruining his life.
* [[Chris's education#Greene County Primary School|Greene County Primary School]], now known as Nathanael Greene Primary School, located in county seat Stanardsville and which Chris attended from kindergarten to third grade.
* [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]], where Chris attended for fourth grade and was allegedly abused by its staff.

CWC's Sonichu Site!

2026-06-18T04:11:29Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

[[File:Scom.PNG|thumb|250px|Bright gaudy background colors seem to be mandatory on vanity pages.]]

'''CWC's Sonichu Site!''' (full title: '''The Official & The Originial '''''[sic]'' '''From Christian Weston Chandler the Sonichu and Rosechu Site!''') was Chris's homepage for the ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' franchise. It existed in various incarnations from [[2000]] to [[August 2009]], and was a regular target of hacking by trolls following Chris's discovery in 2007. Half a decade later, Chris's [[Facebook]] friends helped him make a new site, which was pretty much non-functional and error-ridden during its astonishing 10-day life.

==Design==
Chris liked to harp on how he took two HTML classes and likes to construct his page on [[Wikipedia:Netscape Composer|Netscape Composer]], a mercifully discontinued software product. It is fairly obvious that either the HTML classes didn't teach good web design principles, or Chris [[A Week With Christian Chandler|slept through those sections]].

The main hub of the Sonichu site was the front page. Chris dumped everything on the front page, all of the content centered. Chris also added things to the page in random places with little thought as to where they would go, and didn't really have the time and energy to update the page. In its later incarnations, the page had mentions of ''[[Animal Crossing]]'' material, Chris's changes to the comic, and had "[[Chris and copyright|Copyright]] CWC and [[Nintendo]]", long after the end of the [[Miyamoto Saga]].

Chris's site also boasted that it was a member of the "Super [[Sonic]] Webring"; closer inspection reveals that Chris's site is not listed as a member of the webring, and Chris failed to insert the correct codes (i.e., he failed to put in his member ID, leaving "_SITE_ID_HERE_" in the links) – this simple failure to follow very simple setup instructions may have been why he was not approved as a member, as Webring owners usually checked this. His Fastcounter link is also broken. In its earliest incarnations Chris had a MIDI playing in the background, just to get that old Web 1.0 feel.

===Sonichu-Fans (2008)===
'''Sonichu-Fans''' was a small sub-site of Sonichu.net, created by [[PandaHalo]], and meant for use by Chris's [[fans]]. Chris introduced it with:

{{quotebox|**NEW and OFFICIALLY APPROVED, it is the Sonichu & Rosechu Fan Site, AKA the OFFICIAL Sonichu & Rosechu Chat Page.** It is worth CHECKING OUT, what with the APPROVED Fan Content from my well-trusted Webmaster of the Page. Including Sonichu & Rosechu Bio Blocks, Coloring Pages, a few bits of Random Intelligence from the TRUE Man Behind the Electric-Hedgehog, Christian Weston Chandler. And OF COURSE the Well-Created, Java-Designed Sonichu & Rosechu Chat Box for the TRUE, GOOD, LOYAL Sonichu & Rosechu Fans to gather and chat (Sometimes I'll make an appearance to answer some questions).}}

Most of the site's features were never really created. Its most notable feature was "Sonichu fan chat", a Java [[IRC]] applet that connected to [[Sonichu (IRC chat)|Rizon's #sonichu channel]]. In the days following its introduction, Chris appeared in the fan chat in person a few times.

===Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack (early 2009 – May 2009)===
{{main|Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack}}

After the nuclear winter following the release of [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], Chris had made a solemn promise not to release any more naughty imagery. Naturally, he had to break this vow when he found out about the [[Sonichu Girls]] forum and wanted to impress the members.

== Content ==
===Earliest Appearance===
[[File:Sonichu site original.png|thumb|The incredibly garish original appearance.]]
In terms of content, Chris's Sonichu site was at first almost identical to [[CWC's Pokésite 2]]. There were links to game reviews, his [[Sonichu's News Dash!]], his [[Wall of Originals|original Sonic cards]], and most importantly, a link to his "About the Author" page. Guests could listen to a remixed version of "Sonic Boom" The main visual portrayed Sonic and Sonichu as equals, and the centered text didn't even play up Sonichu. It read simply:
[[File:193-soniclgo.jpg|thumb|Original main visual.]]
{{quotebox|
Welcome...

To my new Sonic the Hedgehog Site!

Enjoy your visit. 8)

Please visit again for many Updates, be sure to Bookmark us, and be sure to tell your friends about us, too. And, Please sign my Guestbook.}}

As Chris created new minor sites over the years, such as his [[Hot_Wheels#CWC's_Vroom-a-Zoom!|Hotwheels page]] and his [[Lego#Christian's_Bionicle_Site|Bionicle site]], he provided links. In 2002, he added something called "The Sonichu Chronicles Slideshow." In general, he does not seem to have given much attention to the site during its first several years.

===The influence of the [[Love Quest]]===
In 2003 and 2004, Chris's life became focused on the Love Quest, and in early 2004, he reinvented the Sonichu Site as a platform for advertising himself and his artistic geinus.

{{quotebox|*We interrupt this view with a special bulliten, the Sonichu Site is finally updated with all new GameCube and Game Boy Advance information. 8)
And the All New Sonichu's News Dash! Newsletter!}}

The reinvigorated News Dash, of course, was more than anything else a tool to acquire a girlfriend. Chris also added his romantic fantasy [[Sonichu & Rosechu… The Genesis of the Lovehogs]]. His "About the Author" section was updated to include one of his first lists of qualifications for a sweetheart. He also highlighted Sonichu's first appearance in ''Nintendo Power'' magazine, and the later "personal ad" in the magazine in which he discussed his [[noviophobia]]. By 2006, the central visual on the site was a cartoon representation of Chris himself, and the "About the Author" section was the first and most important link, given priority even over [[Sonichu 0|issue #0 of ''Sonichu'']].

Links to new issues of ''Sonichu'' were added as they appeared. At a moment of writer's block, he wrote:

{{quotebox|*The uploading of the Sonichu Issues #3 and 4 images were inspired by the local Sonichu Fan Club of Charlottesville, Virginia.*

<nowiki>*</nowiki>Thank You all for reminding me to get off my duff and back to drawing the fun Sonichu comics.* :j

As a man of my word, I promise them and you all that there will be many more issues to come onto CWC's Sonichu Site!}}

Upon [[Megan]]'s rejection, he temporarily lost inspiration, and had to note:

{{quotebox|*Sonichu Issue Number Six is still in the works, as I progress through my lonesome depression.}}

As with all his sites, he used the site to scream about [[Adam Stackhouse]] and the [[Parappa Contest]].

Shortly after producing his [[DVD]], he highlighted his new educational video, and indicated that he was starting to receive some ridicule for his opinions:

{{quotebox|For the benefit of the Present and the Future beyond my 25th Birthday on Februrary 24, 2007, I have created this movie which was on the "Christian Weston Chandler... Yep, I'm On T.V." DVD.

So, I present for you all, straight from my Director's Cut, "[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|Christian Weston Chandler's Future Message]] 022407."

Enjoy, Learn, and [[homos|Stay Straight]] (I AM SERIOUS).}}

===Chris discovers his fanbase===
According to plan, by mid-2008 Chris believed that he had an extensive fanbase, and he started to make demands. In August he made a significant update to the site with a statement he also placed on his [[The OFFICIAL Sonichu & Rosechu Blog|blog]], a spiel about how amazing his game will be if you'd just take the time to flood the Nintendo and SEGA forums demanding it be made. Chris is careful to announce that he will be reducing his own presence in the story, shortly before explaining that the entire plot of the game will be about him:

{{quotebox|'''An Important Update'''

With the Sonichu Fanbase growing wildly with lots of energtic Hype, I am ready to take '''Sonichu''' and my world of '''Cwcville''' back to Nintendo of America and SEGA of America. And upon the unity in business between '''Nintendo''', the company who provided me with my second gaming system, the Game Boy, after my very first '''Commodore 64''' computer, '''SEGA''', the company who introduced '''Sonic the Hedgehog''' as not only my Life-Long Hero, after the American Rabbit, but as the True Role Model Icon I am proud to have learned some of my attitudes and beliefs from since 1991, and myself, '''Christian Weston Chandler''', we will make Sonichu and Rosechu and their world being more Real than I was able to make them by myself with pen and markers in hand, and a vasly-knowledgeable imagination.

You won't be able to truly say you've "Caught Them All", until you've caught the Original Sonichu and Rosechu in a CWC Approved Nintendo/Sega Pok'emon Lightning Version on GBA and DS to catch a great share of the other currently avilable '''Four Hundred and Ninty-Three''' Pok'emon.

Think you know the ins and outs of Sonichu and Rosechu, wait until Season Two of the Comic Book Series, likely to start within the year 2009. I will withdraw myself from being as intrusive in the series as I have been so far; I've been selfish, and I'm tired of drawing myself so much. See how I take my leave of Cwcville in the Season Finale, to hopefully be uploaded and on the Sonichu Site 4th Quarter, 2008 or 1st Quarter, 2009.

And because I've been hogging the spotlight, you don't know Sonichu and Rosechu as you properly should. In the first CWC Approved Release of the "Sonichu's Adventure" video game, with Nintendo and SEGA's help, on Nintendo Wii (although it was intended originally for Gamecube), with compatibility with the Wii Classic Controler as well as Gamecube Contoller, with rumble functionality hopefully. Sonichu is more than Lightning and Lightning-Speed, and Rosechu is more than delightful Bolts and Heart-Felt for Sonichu. Play on, as they rescue each other from the darkest evil that has manifested itself within some recycled nuts and bolts on the moon. And what a storyline it will have, based mostly from the comics with the duo and the Chaotic Combo as well.

And I HAVE the idea for the Video Game for myself, if I can swing that with SEGA as well, an epic tale of my tragic Adult Life straight from my tortured heart and soul. I will bring the pain to the Jerkops, I will kick Mary Lee Walsh into her cauldron to burn, as well as the other villians. And I will have support from my Electric-Hedgehogs, my mother and father, my Closest Gal-Pals who I've grown to love; '''Megan Schroeder''' and '''Anna McLerran''' to name a couple, sparingly in the game. And I will square-off in the TRULY SELF-EPIC Battle between me, and my Dark Half. I plan to have THIS GAME ALONE go Multi-Console between Nintendo Wii, Playstation 2 and Playstation 3 (with downloadable content).

'''And All This CAN come to Fruition... with YOUR HELP!'''

The populace of Sonichu, Rosechu and Christian Chandler fans. All I ask for in minimum, is to contact Nintendo of America AND SEGA of America by way of POSTING in their respective FORUMS, sending them E-Mails, and, HIGHLY Recommended, Hand-Written Letters to BOTH Companies, that You Want Sonichu, and that they should get in touch with me, Christian Weston Chandler, via Telephone or Snail-Mail, or In Person. Both Companies have my information in their computers, as I have written to them a number of times in my lifetime.

'''Who do you want to catch?'''

Sonichu and Rosechu!

'''Who's the Underdog Director you've grown to know?'''

Christian Weston Chandler!

'''When Do You Want Nintendo and SEGA to Talk to Me to EVOLVE Sonichu and Rosechu more Realistically?'''

'''NOW!!!'''}}

His fans were instrumental in helping Chris win a [[Guitar Hero]] [[GameStop Be A Star Sweepstakes|contest]]:

{{quotebox|**Vote for Me to get me as possibly a Playable Character in a Future Guitar Hero Game, with Sonichu & Rosechu in my Band!**

ONLY the above Picture is Officially on that Sweepstakes Page, and the matching "gid" in the address is equal ONLY TO 1252; ALL OTHER GID NUMBERS of any similar pictures of myself are IMPOSTORS. Please Report them to the Sweepstakes People, especially the one I've found whose GID is 1503.}}

{{quotebox|Your Voices Have Been TRULY HEARD!

I just got the Legitimate Call from the GameStop Corporation in Texas Yesterday, and I AM THE TRUE FIRST WINNER of the $400 Gift Card Weekly Winners. Now all there is to do, is wait and hope that they pick me to be a Playa in a Future Guitar Hero Game, with Sonichu & Rosechu in my band.

Thank You All, my Loyal Sonichu & Rosechu Fans!}}

He also discussed his utilization of [[Little Big Planet]] to advertise Sonichu:

{{quotebox|'''Playstation 3 2nd Anniversary LittleBiGPlanet Level.'''

My loyal fans, I am finishing my 18th episode comic. But Also, I have Published a New LittleBiGPlanet Level, "[[PS3 History Level|LBC1-CWC's Playstation 3 History]]" for a chance to win the RARE Crown for my Sonichu Sackboy (See Image of Sonichu in LBP above). Anyway, ALL of you who play LBP on your PS3, or plan to do so, Please Heart this Level (Hearting is like "Favoriting"); the Top 5 Levels will consist of those "LBC1-" Levels with the MOST HEARTS.

I have also uploaded a video onto YouTube of a Play-Through of the Level, so enjoy. :)}}

He was excited to learn that this effort paid off:

{{quotebox|I have CAUGHT Media Molecule's Attention with MY LBC1-Level! And to quote them,

{{quoteboxred|CWC's PLAYSTATION 3 History Level

Brought to use by Sonichu, his PLAYSTATION 3 History level is a definitely must see. Complete with a series of mini- games and innovative mechanisms, we were enthralled by the amount of content and PS3 features the level was able to highlight. We especially like how Sonichu took full advantage of the PLAYSTATION Eye by presenting a detailed lineup of various movies and games from the PLAYSTATION / BlueRay family.}}

Thank You, Media Molecule; YOU have just made my Thanksgiving Day of 2008! :D

I also have a few more ideas of improvement, like an area above the Game/Blu-Ray selection with games and Movies that I don't have in my Collection that ARE CHOICE.

If you have any suggestions, please e-mail your PS3 Game/Blu-Ray Movie Choices List to me @ ChrisChanSonichu@aol.com, or send me a message over the Playstation Network to my PSNID: Sonichu.

Happy Thanksgiving to ALL my Sonichu & Rosechu Fans, Sony and Media Molecule! :D}}

===Trolls seize control===
Soon, Chris believed that he was in contact with Nintendo, and reassured his fans:

{{quotebox|'''**From the WORDS of my Nintendo Lawer**'''

Just to put the MATTER TO REST, from the words of my Nintendo Lawyer, who has been Most Trustworthy and Helpful, states in an e-mail he sent to me Janurary 7, 2008, and I quote:

SEGA has never disaproved of the Sonichu franchise, even when I directly conversed with the head of their Legal department (which they also have In-house), You don't have to worry about any legal issue, unless I inform you of a problem I have come across, Otherwise it is false or rumor.

SO, I TELL YOU ALL IN THE FANBASE, IT IS ALL GOOD BETWEEN NINTENDO AND SEGA ON SONICHU, ROSECHU AND ALL STORY PARTS THEREIN.

<nowiki>**</nowiki>CELEBRATE GOOD TIMES!

COME ON, PLAYSTATION 3 & LITTLEBiGPLANET! :D}}

When [[JK Productions]] got in touch in August 2008, he included a link:

{{quotebox|Also, for the Video Game Ideas, The Official CWC Approved Sonichu Video Game Blog is up and running at <nowiki>http://sonichugame.blogspot.com/</nowiki>.}}

But on 11 September 2008, in part because of opposition from his video game partner, he declared:

{{quotebox|**After Serious Consideration and numerous complaints, I HAVE REMOVED the explicit sexual pages from EPISODE 17 of Comic #8, And as GOD Promised NEVER again to Flood the earth with a Rainbow over Noah's Ark, I cast My Rainbow of Promise to NEVER AGAIN Draw or Upload any Further Images between Sonichus and Rosechus in EPISODE 18 of Comic #8, as well as ALL Future Comics, that depict explicit sexuality. I, Chritian Weston Chandler, Humbly and Sincerely, From the Bottom of my Heart, Apologize to EVERYONE who has read the 17th Episode before September 10, 2008, after the Waterloo of an Episode was uploaded on September 9, 2008. Thank you for your Patronage and Growing Fanbase.**

Also, after a good number of e-mails sent from my fanbase, I have removed the anatomy of Sonichu & Rosechu from the 17th Episode, and I have re-uploaded the two pages of Rosechu's sampling of Centerfold pics. Also, look forward to more similar pics in the side-project of that mentioned parody of "Pokeboy" magazine, that will feature sexy pics, and short biographies, of some of the female characters in bathing suits or bra/panties featured so far in the world of Sonichu & Rosechu to further ensue my Peaceful Protest against the Slanderous E.D. Page.

<nowiki>**</nowiki>No Target date has been set for the one-issue magazine.**}}

When Chris suffered a major hacking, he reassured his readers on 17 September 2008:

{{quotebox|It's been a rough day for me on this 17th of September, but I am recovering over time.}}

On 11 December 2008, he warned:

{{quotebox|'''IMPORTANT REMINDER'''

I have NOT YET APPROVED any Sonichu or Rosechu Merchandise, yet someone has POSED as me and said that I had "approved" some t-shirtS; '''DO NOT BUY!''' They have NOT received my official consent or approval AT ALL.}}

===2009: The final months===

In early 2009, Chris was contacted by the creative minds behind Nintendo and entered into [[Miyamoto Saga|discussions]] to turn Sonichu into a video game. In compliance with their wishes, he posted:

{{quotebox|'''Restoration Update, January 15, 2009:'''

Sonichu.net is FULLY RESTORED (with a sacrifice; I could not restore the Bionicle Site; it will be remembered). The only item remaining is the Restoration of the Sub-Domain Sonichu & Rosechu Fan Site from my [[PandaHalo|Sweetheart and Partner]].

The Comic Book [[Retroactive continuity in Sonichu|Changes]] previously Advised by [[Shigeru Miyamoto|Mr. Miyamoto]] are listed below

* Curse-Ye-Ha-Me-Ha will be known as Shin-Ye-Ha-Me-Ha

* Mary Lee Walsh will be known as Slaweel Ryam the Witch

* Sarah Nicole Hammer (Spicer) will be known as Nicole Rammer

* Wes Iseli will be known as Walter Grisby

* Hanna to Fandanna

* Bagget to Dagget

* Megan Schroeder, although personally agreed for me to use her name and such, she will continued to be known affectionately as Meg-Chan.

* Jason Kendrick Howell and [[File:Kat_name_text.png]] will only be reffered to by ther FIRST NAMES ALONE.

* Laura Beth Dorazio to Laura B. Dorzio

* Joseph Herring to Joe Herr

* Joseph Cole Smithey (my half-brother/NYC Movie Reviewer on colesmithey.com) to "Joe Cool" Smithey

<nowiki>**</nowiki>Also Real-Life product and store placements have either been removed or changed, such as "Trojan" to "Jimmy", and the AXE Ad being removed.}}

A short time later, he suffered one in a series of hacking attempts, and on 3 February he announced:

{{quotebox|**Attention! As .NET was OFFICIALLY DENOUNCED and cited as Obsolete, the Troll, [[Jason Kendrick Howell|J.K.H.]] has uploaded his COPIED FILES and such to make a Copycat of the NEW, TRUE Sonichu & Rosechu Site that is NOW, as of January 16, 2009, Sonichu.info. DO NOT BELIEVE ANYTHING that is ON .net from the 16th of January. Besides which, you can SEE A NUMBER of differences that seperate ''[sic]'' the TRUE Sonichu & Rosechu Site from the Obsolete and now FAKE, sonichu.net.

I'd list the differences, but I feel that the True, Loyal Fanbase can tell the Differences, and KNOW to update their bookmarks as such. Also, I have uploaded a Self-Recoreded [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 16th, 2009|Update Video]] onto YouTube advertising the FACT.}}

After yet another hacking of one of his domains, Chris wrote on 9 April 2009:

{{quotebox|'''**Welcome to Cwcville.com**'''

Finally Back UP AND RUNNING again after the past "[[Julie]]" Fiasco.
I am currently drawing pages for the #9 Book, and more pages will be drawn/colored at a rate of 3 pages-a-day, with due inspiration from my Sweetest [[Ivy]]. I may have lost the third hand-made medal, but I still have my whitty, charming and humble personality. And with God and Jesus Guiding me to my Prayers' Answer, I shall perservere.

* The currently colored/uncolored hand-drawn pages for Book #9 will be uploaded within the next few days from today, the 9th of April, Y2K9.

* A Good (Suitable for Youth and Teens) Fan Art Section will be added in the near future to Cwcville.com.

* Maybe a Cwcville Map to navigate between the Sonichu Site, and the few other sub-sites, and sections.

* No dang dirty Trolls will keep me down.

Love and Peace,

"Christopher" Christian Weston Chandler.}}

On 1 May he updated:

{{quotebox|'''The Sonichu Quiz is on BUZZ! Quiz TV (Another good reason to get a Playstation 3).'''

Yes, BUZZERS! I have officially uploaded two Official Sonichu and Rosechu [[Quizzes]] on MyBUZZQuiz.com, as well as a quiz about me personally, and the [[Dating Education]] Quiz (minus one True/False question and the Essay Portion) is on there too.

Also, the #9 Book is progressing at a steady, consistant pace, and will be uploaded in shortly a due time. I express my deepest gratitude for your paitence in my time to create, while I am also surrounded by stressful inputs from the Trolls, financial news and other recent news topics as well.

But I thank God and Jesus Every Day for sending '''Ivy''' My Way, and I look forward to her arrival into my home and into my arms. :)}}

After one final hacking, Chris gave up on this site altogether and shifted his attention to [[Wikipedia]] and the [[CWCipedia]].

== Hosting history ==
===Primordial origins (August 2000 – 2007)===
The original incarnation of the Sonichu Site was hosted on the near-legendary free host for crappy personal web pages, {{w|Tripod (web hosting)|Tripod}}, at <nowiki>http://sonichuchandler.tripod.com/cwcson.htm</nowiki> (http://web.archive.org/web/*/http://sonichuchandler.tripod.com/cwcson.htm). As the site was launched back when it was not yet a crime to violate aesthetics and common sense in web design, Chris's page blended right in. Before this, [[CWC's Pokésite 1]] and [[CWC's Pokésite 2]] had been hosted on AcmeCity and Go.com, respectively, two other popular hosts for ineptly cobbled-together personal pages.

Chris even reminisces about his "Sonichu Site Filing Facility Hosted by Tripod" in [[Sonichu 10|issue #10]], not that it makes any frigging sense. It is probably just some sort of a comic-page manifestation of a psychotic break. He calls this "burning the Tripod bridge". The fact that trolls hacked the site must have been particularly traumatizing to Chris.

In the comic, [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]] defeats some devil [[trolls]], moves his files away from Tripod, and bombs the crap out of the site. He then says, "Tripod was weak, in security, and it lacked the support for Flash media, anyway." In truth, Chris's site was hacked entirely due to his weak passwords and sloppy security practices. For example, in security questions, he has put in answers that could be looked up from the web; everyone knows his [[Mary Poppins|favorite film]]. Unfortunately, the [[CWCipedia]] didn't support [[Wikipedia:Flash animation|Flash]] either – otherwise, his fans would have been thrilled to see what kind of craziness his two HTML classes could have inspired him to create.

Despite this, the Tripod domain version of the site remained up until the hacking of Sonichu.net in January 2009, at which point the content was removed entirely. Tripod ultimately shut down for good in April 2026.

===[[sonichu.com]]===
Chris was never able to use this domain after trolls registered it, instead going for the domain below.

The domain was first used as a Sonichu fan page before being turned into redirects to Chris' [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page in December 2008, and Chris' [[For Julie's Eyes Only|sex tape]] on SlutLoad in February 2009. The last known pre-CWCki usage of the domain was used as a redirect to the [[Asperchu|Asperpedia]] in January 2010.

On 7 [[November 2010]], the CWCki acquired the domain and has since been used to house this very wiki, much to [[June 2019 social media posts#Chris wants to reconcile with Manchester High and the Cwcki's domain|Chris' dismay]].

===sonichu.net (2007 – January 2009)===
This was established sometime near the end of [[2007]] after trolls registered the above domain (in Christian's words, "[[Sonichu Game Talk|nothing but net]]").

On 8 [[January 2009]], Chris emailed the password to [[Gregg Mays]], who hacked the site and prompted Chris to show his [[fangs]]. On the 12th, the site was restored after making Chris do a video [[I am STRAIGHT|saying that he is straight]]. Four days later, [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 16th, 2009|the site was hacked again]] by the now-named [[Clyde Cash]] posing as [[Jason Kendrick Howell]], this time prompting Chris to make [[Jason Kendrick Howell message|a threatening phone call]] to Howell. The following day, the domain and password were put on [[eBay]] for auction<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20090122041338fw_/http://cgi.ebay.com:80/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=250359106953]</ref> and was sold ten days later.

After being sold, the domain featured a video of Chris practicing kissing with his hand before being turned into a Meatspin mirror site. Sometime between August and September, the domain was used to host a mirror of the [[parody]] [[CWCville]] site onetruecwcville.net until reverting to Meatspin in February 2010. A year later, the website's domain expired and the domain redirected to a domain holding page.

After its initial expiration, the domain was re-registered in February 2015 for a year and redirected to the website of the Sydney Christadelphian Youth Circle.

Currently, as of 2016, the domain is owned by Skenzo and redirects to various spam/scam typosquatting websites.

=== sonichu.info (January 2009) ===
After Sonichu.net's hacking on 16 [[January 2009]], Chris reestablished his site at this domain. It was hacked just shy of two days later and became a redirect to [https://web.archive.org/web/20090124071817/http://sonichu.110mb.com/ sonichu.110mb.com], a [[parody]] site created by [[Jimmy Hill]]. When the man takes you away, do not resist. By 2010, the domain expired and redirected to a Sedo parked domain page. As of 2025, the domain is blank.

===sonichuandrosechu.com (February 2009)===
After a hiatus, on 4 February 2009, Chris relaunched his site at this domain and showcased it in a [[CWC Update 8 February 2009|video]]. This incarnation was most notable for seeing the debut of Chris's official Rule 34 section, [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack]], which launched on the 12th. It lasted a little longer this time round, that was until Chris gave the password to [[BlueSpike#Julie|Julie]] with predictable results. The contents of the site following the hacking are unknown.

By August, the site's domain was blank. In 2013, it became a Sedo parked domain page. It was later bought and re-registered for a year in February 2015 (along with the sonichu.net domain) and redirected to the site of the Sydney Christadelphian Youth Circle. After the expiration, it was used as a cybersquatting redirection site. As of 2025, the site redirects to a GoDaddy holding page.

===cwcville.com (April – May 2009)===
[[Image:Hackedbyjosh.jpg|right|thumb|The content of the website following the domain's hacking.]]

Chris purchased this domain on [[April 2009|April]] 6 and relaunched his site a few days later on the 9th. Since Chris didn't know how to manage the mess of links he had created, many links on the site were broken, such as the one to [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack]], and the one linking to a Sonic-themed {{w|webring}}. Guests had to change the domain name to visit them. Da major update he made to this site was to paste his [[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile|autobiography]] after it got deleted from [[Wikipedia]].

On 15 [[May 2009]], the site was once again hacked and compromised, being replaced a message that slammed Chris for not keeping up with his promise to deliver new comics and demanded the completion of [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]]. A day later, the message was replaced with an image of [[Joshua Martinez]] which gave the suggestion that he was the one who hacked the site. A new message was added, slamming Chris for thinking he was really in contact with [[Vanessa Hudgens]], playing upon a [[Clyde Cash|famous copypasta]]:

{{Quote|Hey Faggot,

My name is [[Joshua Martinez]], and I hate you. You are a [[Obesity|fat]], [[Slow-in-the-minds|retarded]], no-life who spends every second of his day drawing stupid ass pictures. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, [[Virgin with rage|have you ever gotten any]] [[China|pussy]]? I mean, I guess it's fun making fun of people because of your own insecurities, but you just take to a whole new level. This is even worse than fucking an [[anime]] [[Kimmi|blowup doll]].
 
Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I'm pretty much perfect. I was captain of the football team, and starter on my basketball team. What sports do you play, other than "jack off to naked drawn animal people"? I also get [[Honor roll|straight A's]],] and have a banging hot girlfriend (She just blew me; Shit was SO cash). You are a faggot who should just kill himself. Thanks for listening.

Pics Related: It's me and my bitch
|The message directed to Chris}}

The following day, the content was replaced with a photoshopped image of Chris at a [[Homos|gay pride]] festival, alongside Vanessa's nudes and images of Josh and Vanessa together, which suggested that they had a [[sweethearts|relationship]]. The message was changed again, where Josh bragged about having sex with her:

{{Quote|<center>dame man no wonder u cant get a gf</center>
<center>btw vanessa is real and she just mess with u lol. guess who just got laid lol.</center>|The message.}}

By the 19th, the site went offline and was turned into a GoDaddy holding page. Since the end of 2010, the domain has been owned by another parked domain business. It has seen a brief resurgence in 2012 as a redirect to a [[Chris and religion|Christian]] book shop's website.

===<nowiki>http://www.spergweb.com/SonichuOnline</nowiki> (November 2014)===
On 20 [[November 2014]], Chris's Facebook [[white knight]] [[Kenneth Erwin Engelhardt|Kenneth Engelhart]] created the first Sonichu website in five years, so that Chris would have a place where he could dump his [[Sonic Boom Protests|blue arm ramblings]]. While this motive may at first seem in line with those of Chris's trolls – encouraging Chris to produce new content is a unanimous goal – Kengle's reasoning was more unusual. A man in his 50s who still lived with his parents, Kengle's primary goal in life was to befriend Chris by giving him a safe space to vent his tard-rage. From the start, the site was barely functional and drenched in the amateurish 90s HTML stylings that only two unemployed adult autists could achieve. At least one page was made, Chris's partial biography, directly copied from his [[Chris's Wikipedia profile|Wikipedia profile]]. Links suggested that the site would eventually contain Sonichu character profiles, the comics themselves, and other classic Chris content. Note that although the site was officially meant to be about Sonichu, Ken's priority was the vanity page about Chris himself.

The site also contained a forum with very strict moderation. Some users from [[Kiwi Farms]] made accounts so they could dick around, but the site collapsed before they could have their accounts verified. Presumably, Ken intended to coerce Chris into posting, but of course this never happened.

The page received DDoS attacks from [[weens]] almost immediately after its creation, and only displayed 404 errors for a while. Ken had inexplicably hosted the site on the domain "[[Asperger syndrome|sperg]]web.com." It is not clear why Ken chose this domain to host a site for Chris, a guy known for being a notorious Asperger hater, but this stupid decision resulted in Chris expressing a general distrust of the site. One of Chris's white knights at the ass-patting [[Keep Sonic Original]] festival assured him that the site was being "redesigned".

The website is now shut down permanently. Kengle confirmed this on his Facebook, claiming that he has "other things going on in life", what with his stamp collecting and all. It's more likely that Kengle saw Chris's complaint about the site as some kind of threat to their potential friendship and immediately nuked the site, so as not to offend Great Director Chandler. This makes Spergweb the shortest-lived website Chris has ever technically owned, lasting a mere ten days.

==Gallery==
<center><gallery>
Image:163-cwcsonstecrdver2.jpg|Banner
Image:193-soniclgo.jpg
Image:194-SchuSteLgoIdea2.jpg
Image:195-SchuSteLgoIdea3.jpg
Image:196-Schulgo.jpg
Image:197-cwcsonstecrd.jpg
Image:198-cwctop50.jpg
</gallery></center>

==See also==
* [[Chris and the Internet]]
* [[CWCipedia]]
* [[The OFFICIAL Sonichu & Rosechu Blog]]
* [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack]]
* [[CWCki|Sonichu.com]]
* [[Cwclight]]

==Sources==
<references/>

==External links==
* [https://web.archive.org/web/20120317101851/http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville/ An archived version of the original Sonichu site in all of its homely autistic glory]

{{The Internet}}

[[Category:Chris's websites]]
[[Category:Defunct websites]]

December 2009

2026-06-15T06:14:17Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

[[Image:FamilyGuyChris.JPG|thumb|On '''9 December 2009''' Chris decides he's getting a ''[[Family Guy]]'' episode.]]
[[Image:DevilTrolls.JPG|thumb|On '''9 December 2009''' Chris continues [[Sonichu 10]].]]
[[Image:SonichuChristmas.jpg|thumb|On '''13 December 2009''' Chris starts writing a Christmas story.]]
[[Image:RapeRap.JPG|thumb|On '''15 December 2009''' Chris raps about rape.]]
[[Image:Virginmary.jpg|thumb|On '''16 December 2009''' Chris endorses babyfuck.]]
[[Image:Pagliacci.jpg|thumb|On '''17 December 2009''', Chris temporarily joins the Dark Carnival.]]
[[Image:Demonicrobbie.jpg|thumb|On '''19 December 2009''' Chris creates a monster.]]
[[Image:NewCWCipediaFrontpage.jpg|thumb|On '''30 December 2009''' Chris found a way to make his website even uglier.]]

'''December''' was the twelfth and final month of '''[[2009]]'''. [[Chris]] opened the month by answering the [[Mailbag]], but with shorter, less-enthusiastic answers. He also created additional "rejected" Mailbags to handle questions that made him feel uncomfortable — namely, those dealing with [[homosexuality]] and [[autism]] — and even published a vitriolic screed against people with [[Asperger syndrome]]. He would then upload several disturbing [[YouTube]] videos: one with him performing a [[iPods Down and Listen Up|baffling improvised rap]] that suggested he was a drug-crazed rapist, another [[Hello, Juffalo|rap video]] where he was painted up like an Insane Clown Posse groupie, and [[A Sonichu Day|10 minutes of him]] playing with homemade [[Lego]] figurines of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]]. Once again, he tried to write a story, and after spending six hours writing ''[[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas Story]]'' (which consisted of a few rough, unedited paragraphs), he tried to finish the story in comic form as [[Sonichu 11|''Sonichu'' #11]]. It dragged on past [[Christmas]] day, and ultimately wouldn't be finished until [[2017]]. Unflattering photos of Chris appeared on a Times Square billboard: all real pictures of him drinking his semen and such, except for one where he was Photoshopped into a [[Impulse Gay Social Club|gay bar]]. Chris was also infuriated by increasingly explicit pro-gay banner ads which appeared on [[CWCipedia]]. He would direct his hatred at [[Jack Thaddeus]], who would be the subject of video [[death threats]] on Christmas Day. Chris would close out the year by going batshit insane about the gay ads and mailing a letter to President [[Barack Obama]] requesting that the gay ads be made illegal.

==Events of December 2009==
* '''1 December'''
** Chris uploads [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_9/Page_94 page 94] of issue 9. Instead of a background, Chris fills large areas with purple and orange.
*** Chris answers the letters in [[Mailbag 7]]. Many of these answers are exceptionally rude.
* '''2 December'''
** Chris uploads [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_9/Page_95 page 95].
** Chris responds to the letters in [[Mailbag 8]]. He also creates the [[Rejected Mailbag#Autism Mailbag|Autism Mailbag]], as a part of the ongoing war between himself and people who know what Asperger's syndrome is.
* '''3 December''' - [[Sonichu's Edge|Chris tries jogging]], confuses the acrobatic sport "parkour" with a brand of margarine and posts a [[3 December 2009|Captain's Log Update]] where he speaks about his four minutes of physical activity (with numerous breaks), Sonichu merchandise and ''Little Big Planet''.
* '''4 December'''
** Chris uploads [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_9/Page_96 two] [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_9/Page_97 new] pages.
** Chris uploads a very interesting rant about [[Aspergers (CWCipedia article)|Aspergers]], and answers the letters in [[Mailbag 9]].
** [[Jack Thaddeus]] [[Jack Thaddeus Phone Call|calls]] Chris. Hilarity and confrontation ensues.
* '''5 December'''
** [[Holiday Greetings|Chris gives a "Happy Holidays" speech, and draws Sonichu in the snow]].
** Chris uploads [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_9/Page_98 page 97], in which he implies that only he is allowed to kill [[Mary Lee Walsh]].
* '''6 December'''
** Jack Thaddeus [[Jack_Thaddeus_Phone_Call_2|calls Chris again]].
** Chris answers all the letters in [[Mailbag 10]], and begs his sysop to [[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence#Mailbag Issue (CCS)|make it stop]].
* '''7 December'''
** Chris sends the last of the [[Regina e-mails]].
** Chris uploads the [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_9/Page_99 final] [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_9/Page_100 two] pages in [[Sonichu 9|issue 9]].
** Chris promises that [[Sonichu 10|issue 10]] will be his final appearance as with every person he met in real life in the Sonichu canon.
** Chris's sysop uploads [[Mailbag 11]] and (fortunately) denies Chris's plea to cut off the [[Stress|stressful]] mails.
* '''8 December'''
** Chris's sysop uploads [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Mailbag_12 Mailbag 12].
** Chris and [[Vivian Gee]] discuss ideas to publicize Sonichu, such as having Chris dress up as Sonichu.
* '''9 December'''
** Chris answers [[Mailbag 11]] in the early hours of the morning.
** Chris uploads a [[Captain's Log, Stardate December 9th, 2009|Captain's Log Update]] where he asks about donations and talks about the future of the ''Sonichu'' franchise.
** Chris answers [[Mailbag 12]].
* '''10 December''' - In the early hours of the morning, Chris answers [[Mailbag 13]], and [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Family_Guy rambles] about ''[[Family Guy]]''.
** Chris uploads [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_10/Page_3 two] [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_10/Page_4 more] comics, outlining the beginning of his plan to cure the ''world'' of homosexuality, and answers [[Mailbag 14]]. He also criticizes ''[[Family Guy]]''.
** Chris uploads a [[Fanmail Reading|video]] in which he reads fan mail and demands that fans only send him console games instead of PC games.
* '''11 December''' - Chris uploads [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_10/Page_5 two] [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_10/Page_6 more] pages and answers [[Mailbag 15]].
* '''12 December'''
** Chris congratulates Jack Black for winning a Spike Video Game Award.
** Chris uploads [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_10/Page_7 two] [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_10/Page_8 more] pages, and answers [[Mailbag 16]].
* '''13 December''' - Chris begins writing a [[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas Story|Christmas story]], and answers [[Mailbag 17]] with unprecedented amounts of censorship.
* '''14 December''' - Chris posts [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_10/Page_9 a new page] and starts up [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_11/Page_1 Issue 11].
* '''15 December'''
** In the early hours of the day, Chris answers half of [[Mailbag 18]], and then starts messing around with his old censorship in other mailbags.
** Chris uploads a video to prove to us that he can [[IPods Down and Listen Up|fail at rap]]. He mentions things that can possibly lead to the assumption that he is using Viagra and that he wants a black girl.
* '''16 December'''
** Chris posts [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_10/Page_10 a new page] in issue 10, and a [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_11/Page_2 new page] in issue 11.
** Chris posts a new [[CWC Blog#16 December 2009|blog entry]], discussing his intent to create a page that "sorts out Fact from Fiction from that God D*** [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page". He also experiences a bout with a [[computer]] virus, and goes on a road trip to visit his relatives.
* '''17 December'''
** Chris proves to us again that [[Hello, Juffalo|he fails at rapping again]], but as a Juffalo this time.
** Chris finishes answering [[Mailbag 18]].
** Chris posts [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Chris_chan a new entry], taking the entirety of the ED page and edit it to be TRUE and HONEST on his wiki.
* '''18 December''' - Chris posts [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_10/Page_11 a new page] in issue 10, and a [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_11/Page_3 new page] in issue 11. He also [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Original_CCWC_Art posts pictures of his ModNation CWCVille project].
* '''19 December''' - In the [[Biological Clock|early hours of the morning]], Chris [[CWC Blog#19 December 2009|updated his blog]], and answered [[Mailbag 19]].
* '''20 December''' - Chris [[20 December 2009|torments Kitty Chandler]], talks about his shitty computer, and whines about [[Clyde Cash]].
* '''21 December''' - Chris finishes answering [[Mailbag 20]] and [[Mailbag 21]]. Chris's Sysop uploads [[Mailbag 22]].
* '''22 December''' - In the early hours of the morning, Chris uploads a [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_10/Page_12 a new page] in issue 10, linking it to the preview, and [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_11/Page_4 five] [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_11/Page_5 new] [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_11/Page_6 pages] [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_11/Page_7 to] [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_11/Page_8 Issue 11].
* '''23 December''' - Chris uploads [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_11/Page_9 two] [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_11/Page_10 new] pages to Issue 11.
* '''24 December'''
** Recognizing that excited people waiting for Christmas might need help getting to sleep tonight, Chris gives the internet [[A_Sonichu_Day|a video where he plays with Lego]] to help everyone out.
** Chris gives a shout-out to the [[Shout out to fans in hospital|Columbine shooters]].
** Chris wishes Vivian Gee a merry Christmas, and tells her about Jack Thaddeus's ads on the CWCipedia.
* '''25 December''' - Chris makes another video [[Kill de Jack|endorsing murder]], this time of [[Jack Thaddeus]].
* '''26 December'''
** Chris makes a [[Download For Play Only|video]] in which he announces that he is making his ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]'' level available for download. He then made a [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=LittleBigPlanet CWCipedia page] begging people to not alter his awesome level in any way.
** Chris posts [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_10/Page_22 two new pages], and updates his [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Terms_of_use terms of use page] in regards to the gay ads.
** Chris posts a new [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=LittleBigPlanet CWCipedia page] begging people to not alter his awesome level in any way.
** Chris notices that he now has a [[Twitter]] feed, and [[Twitter#27 December 2009|freaks the hell out]]. However, he quickly deletes the statement as damage control.
* '''27 December''' - Chris uploads [[To Clyde and Jack|a video]] about homosexuality and why suicide is a valid option for [[Clyde Cash|Clyde]] and [[Jack Thaddeus|Jack]].
* '''28 December'''
** Chris replaces the homo ad on his site with one for Coca-Cola, and [[ChrisChanSonichu and WikiSysop correspondence#The Introduction Image Space is NOT Ad Space (CCS)|bitches to his admin]].
** Chris posts [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_10/Page_23 two] [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_10/Page_24 new] pages and a short [[CWC Blog#28 December 2009|diatribe]] on ads, twitter, and da homos.
** Chris answers the letters in [[Mailbag 23]]; CWCipedia's Sysop uploads the [[Mailbag 25]] and [[Mailbag 26]].
** The Twitter feed appears on the front page of [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Main_Page CWCipedia]. It is promptly overrun by trolls.
* '''29 December''' - Chris answers the letters in [[Mailbag 24]] and [[Mailbag 25]].
* '''30 December'''
** Chris answers [[Mailbag 26]], [[Mailbag 27]] and [[Mailbag 28]].
** Chris changes the [[CWCipedia]] welcome image in an attempt to get the ads taken down.
* '''31 December'''
** CWCipedia's Sysop uploads [[Mailbag 29]], [[Mailbag 30]] and [[Mailbag 31]].
** Chris goes batshit insane about the gay ads, makes a [[Address to my Cwcipedia SysOp|video]] about being locked out of the front page of CWCipedia, and sends a letter to President Barack Obama requesting that gay ads be made illegal.
** Chris, deciding to end the year on a high note, answers [[Mailbag 29]] with oneliners and insults. A [[Mailbag 29#Whatever|few]] [[Mailbag 29#Whatever Part II: Coming Storm|choice]] [[Mailbag 29#Whatever III: The glorious burden|letters]], he responded to with "Whatever", so that the sysop can not present them again. Keep in mind these letters were supposed to have been answered weeks ago, and were all constructive and meaningful.
** The [[PVCC (message board)|PVCC message-board]] moves to a different host.

{{timeline}}

CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation

2026-06-15T05:35:02Z

FromtheWordsofBR: /* Video */

The '''CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation''' is a set of videos that [[Chris]] released in hopes of selling the [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'']] franchise to investors. Note that "Personal Sonichu Presentation" can be shortened to [[PSP]].

Chris imagines that he is speaking directly to "businesspeople" who might back the commercial development of [[Sonichu]]. In the first video, he delivers a brief history of his character's creation, and also displays a few Sonichu-related objects in addition to his comics and his famous medallion, including crude clay sculptures of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] and a "[[Sonic]] versus Sonichu" racing board game. He concludes by claiming that he plans to complete between 50 and 100 ''Sonichu'' comics in his lifetime (if Chris kept up his pace he had in late [[2009]], he would have reached the minimum goal in 2029, [[Chris and Health|if he's lucky enough to still be living]], not counting his [[Saga#Dark Ages (20 March 2010 to 3 September 2014)|various]] [[Jail Saga|hiatuses]] over the years and a slow upload schedule that has run dry as of December 2020. Ultimately, Chris is only 15 issues, or only 30% of the way towards the minimum goal).

The second video is substantially less coherent. Chris loses the plot as far as attempting to sell his character and settles down to [[Chris and his ego|narcissistic wallowing in his supposed personal achievements and his fantasies of a vast international ''Sonichu'' fandom.]] He spends several minutes showing off fan [[art]] submitted by [[trolls]], all of which is unsurprisingly far better than anything Chris himself could ever dream of drawing. He also seems to have revived his old dreams of a ''[[Pokémon]]'' video game or trading card expansion starring [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]], which suggests he has forgotten the conclusion of the [[Miyamoto Saga]] or managed to actively push those events out of his mind.

Perhaps his most impressively deluded fantasy involves the prospect of a Sonichu animated series. He believes that [[Sony]] would be interested in developing the show, that the [[Adult Swim|Cartoon Network]] would be interested in broadcasting the show, and that he would direct and star as the voice of himself and Sonichu. (He briefly shows off his "Sonichu voice," an almost indistinguishably higher-pitched version of his normal voice.) While Cartoon Network has not opted to make a Sonichu animated series, they are the American broadcasters of ''[[Sonic Boom]]''. But we digress.

As usual, Chris displays a shocking lack of awareness concerning the nonexistent commercial viability of his character. He also, once again, fails to realize that giving out your home address, home and phone number and other key bits of personal information in a video that's publicly available on [[YouTube]] is not such a hot idea.

In addition to uploading the videos to YouTube, Chris also made a page for these presentations on the [[CWCipedia]]. He also attempted to upload the follow-up PowerPoint presentation videos, but failed, possibly because either the video files were corrupt or he actually thought .ppt files were video files compatible with YouTube.

Animator [[Wikipedia:Harry Partridge|Harry Partridge]] has called this his favorite Chris-chan video.<ref>[http://animationaficionados.com/2011/08/23/episode-35-harry-partridge/]</ref>

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation Part 1
| ytid = mdkUjnBGMSw
| stardate = 23 [[November 2009]]
| subject = {{Comics|text}}, {{Fanart|text}}
| style = {{Smug|text}}
| shirt = {{ClassicShirt|text}}
| previous = [[14 November 2009]]
| next = [[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation#Part 2|CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation Part 2]]
}}
{{quote|Very famous. Very, very famous.}}

=== Transcript ===
[''The song "Sonic Boom" by Pastiche is playing on the PS3 behind Chris, at times loud enough to make Chris hard to understand.''] Mmm. HELLO, w—hello there muh-business people! Welcome to world of [[CWCville]], Virginia, [''Chris fidgets with his [[Medallion of Fail]]''] and the world of [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]]. My name is [[Christian Weston Chandler]] of [[Ruckersville, Virginia]], [[14 Branchland Court]], ZIP code 22968. And, uh, my home phone number is (434) 990-0198, my cell phone being 760-0848.

Anyway, I am here today to talk to you about d—revolutionary geh—leviloutionary lil' character that WILL [''jump cut''] pah, uh—will make a lot of [[money]], because he's already been innernet-famous fer about 20—fer almost 10 years now. [''pulls out a [[Scrapbook of Fail|Sonichu binder]] and holds it up to the camera''] His name is Sonichu. The l'il, real Electric Hedgehog [[Pokémon]] right here. [''points to Sonichu on cover of [[Sonichu 0|Issue 0]], then starts to put away the binder''] You'll find out more about him. You can learn more about him and read [''holds the binder back up to the camera''] the comic books—comic book pages I've written—I've drawn and written so far [''puts the binder away this time''] on [[CWCipedia]], which, uh, the address to that would be next to this [[YouTube]] video in da details.

Anyway, we are here t—t—anyway yeah. His or—his origin is basically... yeah, first off, uh, we have to c—look at the—my big BOOK here. [''pulls out a different, giant binder''] Look how big that book is. [[Pickle|So thick]], I had to get ANOTHER BOOK. [''hefts a second equally huge binder''] Heh. [''sets second binder down'']

Anyway, [''sets giant binder down and opens it''] it all s—[''video skips''] Anyway, uh... upon the cre—uh, upon the physical—upon the mental creation of Sonichu, it originally came to me, because, for one—for a computer graphics class back in high school, I had to create a CD cover for... [''wipes his forehead with his sleeve''] a CD that's, uh, was not to be sold anywhere, but, anyway. Made for fun, but—so, I drew up a...—a—this—this CD cover right here [''holds up a binder page showing [[Christian's Favorite Hits!]]''] and this—this—this was Sonichu's first a—forst official appearance. Front and back on the ins—on the insert. If, anyway, uh, basically, [''video skips''] the—uh, the idea came to me, like, you know, yeah, I wanted to use Sonic the Hedgehog and Pikachu on the cover of my CD, but they're both copyrighted characters, and previously-copyrighted characters were not allowed. So, uh, after lunch, uh, during that same day, in da [[Manchester High School]] with my teacher Miss Naelie Chalifoux, thank'a very much, I have...—it just dawned upon me, with, uh, merging together, in combination of the two, and then Sonichu was born.

Now that and then [[homos|in da but]] storywise, he was born—he—he was born amidst the, uh, s—sitcha—situation in [[Station Square]] whereas portray—previous portrayed in the ''Sonic Adventure'' game, available on Dreamcast and Nintendo GameCube. Ay—yeah, but during the battle, the Chaos Monster, Super Sonic, ran into a spystanding Pikachu and, uh, transformed in—into Sonichu... as that was also—as the origins also described in the ''Number Zero'' book on the—on the CWCipedia.

[''reaches for glasses, then reconsiders and wipes his forehead with his arm'']

Now, the, uhh...—now, Sonichu's appeal—Sonichu and Rosechu's appeal: yeah, mainly, the, uhh, appeal was... [[Sonichu 8|t—aimed towards children]]... and, uhh, there was the start of the books, there. We got little toys here, I put togetter. Even a—even a board game, where we put the boards... right here. Sonic vs. Sonichu, a little racing-type game, but it's a l'il—it's a little bit Monopoly-style, with game ca—with, uhh, cards that you pick up... uhn, and shortcuts. Anyway, that is, uhh, part of the, uhh, merchandising thing that I plan on branching out with... in the world of Sonichu, eventually. As, uhh, p—as portrayed—as previously-mentioned in a YouTube video, I have the official registration copyright of Sonichu... and Rosechu and the C-uh-CWCville, in my—in my own name, and that—and that is also accessible on the CWCipedia: the scan of that... actual piece of paper that came from the Virginia Library of Congress.

[''strains to close his binder's rings and sighs'']

Anyway, yeah, I got a ''whole'' bunch of history here. All my history. It comes, like, you know, from creation... with, uhh...—to making, uhh, to a whole bunch of stories, and whatnot...—and even, uhh, made a title(?)... for it in my [[Homemade Nintendo Power magazine|homemade ''Nintendo Power'' magazine]], which was, uhh—which I believe I told Nintendo of America about... in a previous letter or two. Anyway, yeah, it was—it was very—it was very lucrative, and... we do plan on branching out even on DVD, of, like, on my live DVD that's called [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|''CWC... Christian Weston Chandler... That's Me. Yep, I'm on TV!'']] Uhh, C-''Christian Weston Chandler... Yep, I'm on TV!'' That's the name of the DVD. So, if it comes out on DVD, [[Chris and reality|I hope to get it on... Blu-ray, as well]]. And, also, I've created the, uhh—a couple of Sonich—a, uhh, level S—for Sonichu, on ''[[Little Big Planet]]'', Sony—on Sony [[PlayStation 3]]... which, uhh, is called "Sonichu Episode 0". You can look it up; my [[PSN]] ID is ''Sonichu'': S-o-n-i-c-h-u. ...Anyway, e—e—following this, uhh, video... there will be a... video where, uhh... it will be presented live from my PC: a PowerPoint presentation that can better describe... the situation. Anyway, with the count of books, I plan—I plan on drawing, at least, in my lifetime, hopefully, between fifty to a hundred books.

==Part 2==

{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation Part 2
| video = {{#ev:youtube|3XLWTuswqtA}}
| stardate = 23 [[November 2009]]
| subject = {{Comics|text}}, {{Fanart|text}}
| style = {{Smug|text}}
| shirt = {{ClassicShirt|text}}
| previous = [[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation#Video|CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation Part 1]]
| next = [[Sonichu Powerpoint]]
}}
=== Transcript ===
[''Picking up where the first video left off.'']

By which, uh, definitely more will be a re—a ra—around Sonichu, after I, which I have dubbed myself the [[CWCville|Mayor of CWCville]], in this glorious shopping, this glorious two-story [[CWCville Shopping Center|shopping mall]], ah, that is glorious. I actually have, uh, plans that I have, uh, made in [[Computer Aided Drafting and Design]], which I will present through this video, near the end of it—near the end of this video.

[''He begins flipping through a thick three-ring binder.'']

Anyway, yeah, got a whooole bunch of stuff here. Yeah, we can definitely franchise 'n' all this, you know. Even ideas of a ''Pokémon: Lightning Version'', where players can catch Sonichu and Rosechu in the wild, even breeding them to make the other individual Electric Hedgehog characters that are—have been portrayed in the book, such as Wild, Bubbles, Angelica, Punchy, and Magi-Chan, among others that have also been created as well, due—due—due to, you know, processes of the evolution stones, and daytime/nighttime evolutions, friendship, all that good stuff. All in the—the files here, including their little baby forms Sonee and Rosey, to evolutions from original Sonichu and Rosechu....

[''He displays the Sonichu and Rosechu figures again.'']

...[[Metonic]] and [[Vamprosa]]. Those characters are also featured on the [[CWCipedia]]. At least on Sonichu's page; I'm planning on making a page for Rosechu herself on that note. But, anyway, This—this—this Sonichu franchise, it has a biiig number of fans. I even have a number of fan submissions. Like, this here is a draw—is a piece of fan art that came from a girl I knew in Australia.
[[Image:SonichuCover10.jpg|thumb|right|[[PandaHalo]]'s fanart, which serves as the cover of [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]].]]
[''He holds up the picture, presumably from [[PandaHalo]], to the camera.'']

And that's a postcard sent from her, right there. She, uh, also, uh, created a Sonichu and Rosechu that's featured in the ''Number Nine'' book I'm currently drawing. They go by the name of [[Chloe]] and [[Blazebob Sonichu|Blazebob]].

[''Chris turns around the file revealing another piece of art.'']

Anyway, also, on the flip side of this page is from somebody else. It's possibly the best Sonichu fan art ever. Look at that. That's gonna be the cover of the, uh, the first book that's just based on Sonichu, which'll definitely be after ''Number Ten''...

[''He turns around the picture to display Panda's image.'']

...which this one will be the cover of.

[''He looks at the other image again.'']

Hm. This one came from, uh, "Zorah Q. Zowild," that's his YouTube name. Yeah, also, you know, I've received fan art in the snail mail, those are printed off the internet. Like this lovely one.
[[Image:AliciasSonichuandRosechuFanart.jpg|thumb|"And from that, you know, that's, you know, she could have done a little better like, you know, like Rosey's tail was wrong, but I'll forgive her"]]
[''He holds up a drawing of Sonichu and Rosechu in formal wear.'']

That came from, uh, that came from a lovely woman named Allie, in Sun Valley, California. Thank you. Thank you very much. And from that, you know, that's, you know, she could have done a little better like, you know, like Rosey's tail was wrong, but I'll forgive her. But, still, drew my own version of it.

[''He holds up a crude imitation of the previous drawing.'']
[[Image:CWCsEloquateSonichuandRosechu.jpg|thumb|right|Chris's "superior" version of Allie's drawing.]]
Heh, heh. Isn't that fun? Oh, of course, local art, in Charlottesville, an art—an artist did a caricature of me.

[''He turns around the file to display the caricature.'']

I included that in the ''Number Nine'' book on a billboard.

[''He holds up one more piece of art.'']

Here's another fun piece of fan art. It comes from, uh... B.C. Uh, okay, I can't, uh, Vancouver, B.C. Yeah. Anyway, yeah. [[Chris and reality|Very famous. Very, very famous.]] Yep. Uh, this one's just a fan letter from a... from a [[BlueSpike|Julie in Ohio]].

[''He holds up an image, but the high contrast of his video renders it impossible to make out.'']

Here's a little piece of fan art from a, uh, from someone who's possibly, uh, Japanese. Who lives in [[Virginia]]. And also, recently, this guy here, uh, Jason Darling...thank you very much; I got your package.

[''He holds up a folder of photographs.'']

He made a replica of my [[medallion]], which in them, which, you know, this one here is the original that I made myself from my own hands, from Crayola Model Magic and acrylic paints. In the comic books this allows me to transform into Chris-chan Sonichu. Which, that is described in the comic book pages as reposed in the CWCipedia. Also sent me a pack of Maple Story cards, so again, thank you Jason. I appreciate your encouragement, as well as everybody else's. Anyway, uh... hmm... yeah, I picked up a—also received a fan CD from a—from a, uhh... BK Jones in Texas. Oh, here's anutter—here's anutter fun one that's recent. Look at this envelope. Isn't that... cute? That's fun. And then they did a computer art... over there. This came all the way from... Portland... Oregon, I believe it is. And, uhh, I got various other... fan letters in—in this page. Uhh, I'd pull 'em out, but, you know, they're in—I just left them in their envelopes. Nope, fan art dere.

But, anyway, also, aside from that, uhh... I have definitely—I have definitely made a set of trading—'kay, this is my [[The Wall of Originals|homemade Pokémon trading cards]]... which I, uhh, used—which I keep at home for art's sake. A whole heck—got, like—whole—a ''whole lot'' of them here. This could definitely branch out... And a very ''profitable'' thing, both for between Nintendo and Sega, and also with Son—also possibly with Sony, with, uhh—you know, with the a—also with, uhh, the anime show that maybe—maybe Cartoon Network and their people could help me out on... eh, when tha—when that TV show gets run. Where I'll voic—where I will be happy to—where I will be the ''director'', and I will be voicing myself as Sonichu. Listen to the difference: okay, this is me, Christian Weston Chandler, and this will be Sonichu: [''clearly taking after [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HEIpeZFUnJE George] by not changing his voice whatsoever''] Hey, Rosechu! Let's go out and zap to the extreme! We got some bad guys to defeat! Come on, let's go! Yeah!

[''quietly musing over his own amazing degree of fail''] Hmm... odd, but... [''recovered from the shock, back at normal volume''] anyway, uhh, running low on time. Uhh, just a couple of, uhh, other things of interest: uhh, Sonichu was also previously featured in May, 2004, in this issue of ''[[Nintendo Power]]'' magazine, in "The Crossing Quarterly"... with a, uhh, submission from my ''[[Animal Crossing]]'' game—for Nintendo GameCube, currently also available in—in other titles on DS and Nintendo Wii. And, also, uhh—and, shortly after that, it was featured... in a newsletter at the Piedmont Virgi—at the local [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]]... among, uhh, other... published things. Also, uhh, when the, uhh, Sonic website was owiginawwy—was just CWCSonichu site, I had my own [[Sonichu's News Dash|News Dash newsletters]]. That lasted a short while... Hmm. Actually, uh, yeah, but any—yeah, but, anyway, everybody knows on the CWCipedia, so....

[''sigh'']

Anyway, here: I'll show you the, uhh, just the, uhh, whole layout of the CWCville Shopping Center. I actually have all these... printouts from... my... [[CADD|Computer-Aided Drafting and cla—cla—Computer-Aided Drafting and Design classes]], but this is the last one, right before I graduated from Piedmont Virginia College. hen my degree and certificate in Commu—Computer-Aided Drafting and Design. It's very—it's very good. I mean, I would just imagine this in real life. It would even have a Pokémon Center in there, like the one in New York used to have, before it turned into a Nintendo World, USA. It shoulda stayed a ''Pokémon Center''! Now, that was definitely better appeal than just... Nintend—than just Nintendo, even though, yes, Nintendo... has the rights and everything, but... it was ''the Pokémon Center''! I mean... le—if the CWC—if the CWCville Shopping Center does get built... let's agree to put a Pokémon Center in it. And it has a Mayor's Office... right here, above the... front of—up above the main front entrance of the building... which is as portrayed in the comic book series. Aaand a whole buncha... other stuff I have, uh, here. It's just side-...stuff from... my... life, and whatever.

Anyway, uhh... uhh, pretty much, uhh, take care of it for, uhh, this par—for this portion of the, uhh, video, [''removes glasses''] so the next video to follow this one will be the... [''taps table''] PowerPoint presentation, so I will be reading audioly—I will be reading from that and pointing the camera toward the PC, [''quietly and unconfidently''] thank you. [''gives a half-assed Cub Scout salute'']

So... to Nintendo and Sega and Sony and all the other companies interested in... franchising with me here: [''gives another half-assed Cub Scout salute''] I await your call to my home phone... number or my cell phone.

Thank you very much, and have a [''gives ANOTHER half-assed [[Chris's mannerisms|Cub Scout salute]]''] ''pleasant day''!

==See also==
* [[Chris and the industry]]
{{References}}
{{CWCipedia|chris=Sonichu Presentations}}
{{clear}}
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[14 November 2009]]|nextlink=[[Sonichu Powerpoint]]|}}
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, November 2009| 2009-11-23]]
[[Category:Kodak camera videos| 2009-11-23]]
[[Category:Videos published to ChristianWChandler]]

Cwc dare

2026-06-14T02:35:57Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

"'''Cwc dare'''" is a video that was uploaded on 24 [[July 2009]]. The video consists of Chris, having recovered from being forced to sing a [[It's UGH!|tongue-in-cheek gay acceptance anthem]] a mere hour earlier, singing [[Wikipedia:Stan Bush|Stan Bush]]'s "Dare" from the original animated [[Transformers]] [[Wikipedia:The Transformers: The Movie|movie]], while sitting on his bed. He appears to not have changed his clothes for a while.

The [[Gitar of Fail]] is also present as well as several recycled [[Sonichu]] images, proving that he hasn't drawn anything new in quite some time. The most jaw-dropping moment comes at 1:58, when [[Homos|Chris turns into Rosechu]]. How ''that'' got past Chris's bullet-proof efforts to guard his public image, we have no idea. All but one of the times he shouts "Dare!", he punches at the [[camera]]; the [[Claw of Fail]] also shows up fairly frequently. Chris seemed to have filmed this video as a triumphant "victory" towards surviving having to [[Chris humps his PS3|hump a game console for eight minutes]] and [[It's UGH!|sing a pro-gay song]].

==Description==
{{quotebox|
THE Important Lyrics of the Song on July 25, 2009 and beyond:

"Everybody's trying to break your spirit. 
Keeping you down. 
Seems like it's been forever. 
But there's another voice if you'll just hear it. 
Saying it's the Last Round. 
Looks like it's Now or Never. 
Out of the darkness you stumble into the light. 
Fighting for the things you Know Are Right."}}

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = Cwc Dare
| ytid = RhQWOPB9lcg
| stardate = 24 [[July 2009]]
| subject = {{Music|text}}, {{Homos|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}, {{DenimJacket|text}}
| previous = [[It's UGH!]]
| next = [[Chris humps his PS3]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

Sometimes when your hopes have all been shattered, there's nowhere to turn,
 You wonder how you keep going
 Think of all the things that really mattered, and the chances you burn[''??'']
 The fire in your heart is growing

You can fly if you try leavin' the past behind
 Heaven only knows what you might find

Dare!
 Dare to believe you can survive
 You hold a future in your hands
 Dare!
 Dare to keep all your dreams alive
 Time to take a stand,
 And you can win if you dare!

Everybody's tryin' to break your spirit, keepin' you down
 Seems like it's been forever
 There's another voice and you just hear it sayin' it's the last round[''??'']
 Looks[''?''] like it's now or never

Out of the darkness, you stumble into the light
 Fighting for the things you know are right

Dare!
 Dare to believe you can survive
 The power is there at your command
 Dare!
 Dare to keep all your dreams alive
 Time to take a stand,
 And you win if you dare!

Dare to believe you can survive
 You hold the future in your hand
 Dare!
 Dare to keep all your dreams alive
 Time to take a stand,
 And you can win if you dare!

Dare!
 Dare to keep all your [[Love Quest|love alive]]
 Dare to be all you can be
 Dare!
 'Cause there's a place where dreams survive
 It's calling you on to victory
 Dare!

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[It's UGH!]]|nextlink=[[Chris humps his PS3]]|}}
{{Music Videos}}
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]
[[Category:Music Videos]]

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, July 2009| 2009-07-24]]
[[Category:Videos published to IBAChandler]]

June 2009

2026-06-14T01:55:32Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

[[Image:CWCipedia_Introduction.jpg|thumb|On '''7 June 2009''', Chris starts working on his own [[CWCipedia|wiki]].]]
[[Image:Z100_0533.jpg|thumb|On '''12 June 2009''', we see Chris drinking a [[Long Island Iced Tea]].]]

'''June''' was the sixth month of '''[[2009]]'''. [[Chris]] showed relatively small internet presence throughout the month. It was, however, found out that a few field-trolls had befriended Chris, and had started taking him out to bars. Several videos were shown of Chris enjoying the night life with the trolls, and some footage even showed that Chris had taken up drinking [[alcohol]], a habit that he claimed to detest before this date. Chris also started using [[CWCipedia]], a sister project to [[CWCki]], as his own site. Slowly, Chris commenced the writing of articles, thus adding tons of embarrassing information that was unavailable beforehand.

==Events of June 2009==
* '''5 June''' - Chris's [[YouTube]] account, [[YouTube#CChanSonichu (April 2009 – July 2009)|CChanSonichu]], is hacked by trolls, who upload [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009#Take one|the memorable "Coming out of the closet"]] video as well as an amusing, pro-gay music video.
* '''7 June''' - Chris starts editing [[CWCipedia]].
* '''10 June''' - Chris regains control of his [[YouTube]] account, deleting the videos uploaded by the hackers and favoriting several [[Britney Spears]] related videos in order to prove his [[homo|straightness]].
* '''12 June''' - [[Kim Wilson|ScarletSanctum]] uploads [[Chris's Big Night Out|footage]] of Chris drinking Long Island Iced Tea at T.G.I. Friday's with his new friends.
* '''13 June''' - More footage of Chris's night at the restaurant is posted by ScarletSanctum.
* '''14 June'''
** Chris sings [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There]], his poorly-conceived pastiche of "Don't Trust Them New Niggas Over There" from ''Boondocks''. He issues an [[I'm Sorry, Dude|apology]] a mere two hours later.
** A gal-pal played by [[LoveYouLongTime]] calls Chris, pretending to be in the middle of a sleepover with a group of girls, including one named Azul, who was voiced by (surprisingly) [[BlueSpike]].
* '''15 June''' - Chris e-mails [[LoveYouLongTime]] about the call from the night before, and says he thought Azul was "HOT".<ref>[[LoveYouLongTime E-mails, 2009#Ranking China]]</ref>
* '''21 June''' - [[Liquid Chris]] enters the scene and creates his YouTube account, [[CChanSonichuCWC]], with the premise that he is the '''real''' Chris, who has abandoned his old CChanSonichu account and has not yet realized an [[Ian Brandon Anderson|impostor]] is posting there.
* '''27-28 June''' - Chris and his parents travel to [[Wikipedia: Red Oak, Virginia|Red Oak]], Virginia to attend the wedding of Chris's cousin [[Minor Family Members#Jonathan Carey|Jonathan Carey]].
* '''28 June''' - [[BILLY MAYS]] dies under mysterious circumstances.

==References==
<references/>

{{Timeline}}
[[Category:Chronology]]

Gitar of Fail

2026-06-13T23:37:08Z

FromtheWordsofBR: That song does have guitars in it, just very minimal parts (the long chords during the opening/"Do-do-doooo" parts).

{{taxpayermoney}}
[[File:Gitar.jpg|right|thumb|250px|The gitar in the image that won him $400 from [[GameStop Guitar Hero Contest|GameStop]] (''Guitar Hero III'' version).]]

The '''Gitars of Fail''' were Chris's custom-painted ''[[Guitar Hero]]'' controllers that made appearances in several videos. They were not mere game controllers, however; Chris liked to pose with the controllers, for example in [[GameStop Be A Star Sweepstakes]] as well as several videos.

The Gitars also made many appearances in the comics, for example [[Revive Zordon|when going Jericho on 4-Cent Garbage]], and also on the cover of his mocked-up copy of [[Christian Weston Chandler's Adult Chronicles]]. He appeared to think [[Chris and reality|that it counted as an actual instrument and gave him the skill to really play a guitar.]]

<div style="text-align:center;">'''Fun Fact: He failed at using the guitar strap.'''</div>

After the [[10 January 2014]] house fire, it was speculated for years that the Gitars had been destroyed. During a [[Christ Chan Live Stream: OG Cwcville (Cwcville)-60 Minecraft|livestream]] in [[June 2024]], however, Chris revealed that he was still in possession of at least one of the [[PS3]] renditions of the Gitar. The fate of the others is still unknown.

==Gitars through the ages==
[[File:Gitarr.jpg|thumb|How Chris sees himself.]]

Chris made [[wikipedia:Bobby Kotick|Bobby Kotick]] a ''very'' happy man. If the [[October 2010]] [[100 2278|room pictures]] were clear, Chris had ''at least'' 5 Gitars of Fail:

* The ''Guitar Hero 5'' version, which Chris never managed to mod to the extreme.
* The ''Guitar Hero III'' Les Paul version, with [[Sonichu]] paint job.
* The ''Guitar Hero I/II'' Gibson SG version, turquoise with the [[America]]n flag stripes and tons of stickers.
* A mostly [[black]] one.
* Lastly, the ''Guitar Hero: Warriors of Rock'' version, seen in the [[Victory Rockout]] video in August 2011. Chris got this from a garage sale, bundled with an unspecified game.

It's not clear why Chris would buy more than 1 controller, as the controllers were mostly compatible with newer games and he obviously has no friends to play with. Why he kept collecting ''more'' of them after ''Guitar Hero'' went on hiatus is anyone's guess. But then again, common sense has never had much to do with his video game purchasing decisions--or [[Chris and money|any of his purchasing decisions]], really.

He may have had even more of them, as he sold another ''Guitar Hero III'' Les Paul on [[eBay]] in September 2009. He also had a customized ''Rock Band'' Stratocaster known as "[[Things Chris has ripped off|Meatwad's Shredwud]]" appear in a video he recorded in [[Old Time Rock and Roll on Shredwud|October 2009]]. Chris hocked this guitar on eBay around the same time, effectively [[Jimmy Hill|selling a product]] identical to another cartoonist's intellectual property.

==Appearances==

[[File:Sonichu - Advertisement, Christian Weston Chandler's Adult Chronicles, Artwork.jpg|thumb|150px|In the [[Sonichu (comic)|comic]].]]

*The Gitar appeared in the [[PS3 History Level]] video.
*In [[Power]], the [[Nudes|half-naked]] Chris lifts it above his head in a show of [[I AM STRONG|strength]], before miming playing it, namely by wiggling his fingers and screeching.
*In Chris's [[CWC Music Video Holding Out For a Hero|music video]] for [[Ivy]], he uses the Gitar extensively to rock out for her. In this video, it appears that Chris has further decorated the Gitar since he [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 27th, 2008|first introduced it]] in October 2008.
*It appears again when Chris [[100 2266|cosplays as Grimace.]]
*He occasionally mimes out the main guitar riff in his [[CWC "Boyfriend"|"Boyfriend" video.]]

{{clear}}

==Gallery==

===''Guitar Hero II'' version===
<center><gallery>
Image:515-CustomGuitar2.JPG|Closeup of the body. Note how the paint looks like poster paint since Chris's greasy hands would wipe off watercolor.
Image:516-CustomGuitar3.JPG|Neck of guitar controller. Notice Chris's pic of himself playing guitar is on his guitar on the body AND the fretboard. Also, the transformation sequence of [[Chris-chan Sonichu]].
Image:517-CustomGuitar4.JPG|Head. Notice the Sonichu sticker.
Image:514-CustomGuitar1.JPG|Chris showing it off (to himself, at least).
</gallery></center>

===''Guitar Hero III'' version===
[[File:GuitarOfFail.png|thumb|150px|The ''Guitar'' of Fail.]]
<center><gallery>
Image:Gitar3.png|From the 2010 [[100 2278|room pictures]]. Other than the stickers and shoddy paint job, this design looks decent enough.
Image:CWCGitarPlaying.jpg|Quietly confident.
Image:CWCGitarPlaying2.jpg|The funny thing is, there are no guitar solos in the song "Holding Out For a Hero"... at all.
Image:CWCShred.jpg|There's barely even guitar ''parts'', I'm afraid.
</gallery></center>

==See also==
* [[GameStop Guitar Hero Contest]]
* [[Chris and music]]
* [[Guitar Hero]]

{{Articleofthenow}}
{{Relics of Fail}}
[[Category:Relics of Fail]]
[[Category:Video Games]]

C.W.C. - Thank You :)

2026-06-13T23:34:57Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

"'''C.W.C. - Thank You :)'''" is a video in which [[Chris]] stumbles upon a "revelation" concerning why he is trolled and thanks [[ED]] and [[trolls]] for trolling him.

Despite Chris's high talk, the true purpose of the video seems to be that the trolls provide proof that Chris is not the impostor Chris, but is in fact the TRUE and HONEST Christian Weston Chandler because only the real Christian Weston Chandler is the one who is trolled and is the laughing stock of the Internet.

Note that, although he insists that we're "twisting the truth" to make him look bad, Chris acknowledges that everything on our site is basically accurate. This means he is admitting to being a [[Chris and race|racist]], [[Homos|homophobic]], [[Women's rights|chauvinistic]], [[Chris and his Ego|self-satisfied]] manchild; he just doesn't see why that's a bad thing.

It's also worth mentioning that Chris gives an apology to [[Mary Lee Walsh]] in the video description side-bar (complete with hope for reconciliation), suggesting that the video predates the delivery of his hand-drawn apology and subsequent ban from [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|PVCC]].

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = C.W.C. - Thank You :)
| ytid = E9FX4IJ8aFQ
| stardate = 03 [[August 2009]]
| style = {{Reason|text}}
| saga = {{Liquid|text}}
| shirt = {{ClassicShirt|text}}
| previous = [[SingStar Challenge Round 3#IBAChandler's Bonus Video|Yearbooks]]
| next = [[Exposing Jeff]]
}}
{{quote|I thank you trolls. I thank you for documenting the truth.}}

=== Transcript ===

[[Captain's Log]], Stardate: April 3rd, [''removes glasses''] 2009.

I have had the revelation, I now see the truth. [''puts his glasses back on''] I see the truth behind the reason why the trolls troll me. Why they have been, why the're still doing it and all the like. Not just because the're bored, not just because they want information. Not just because they want to get to know me, not becau—not just because they have been emotionally hurt themselves, [''Chris's [[PS3]] beeps''] so many details that could be supposed for all the reasons to be listed. But, [''looks at his red clipboard''] the [[trolls]] are there to document the truth. Granted, they twist them around with their own evil ways. Try to make the individual look bad, but they still document the truth.

And with that [''raises his clipboard''] I would like to say the following assortment of words... that I have felt from my heart.

It is good to have my own trolls. They may try, and sometimes succeed, in getting true, hard, honest information from one, and they may later twist the truth for their evil purposes. Just like the ''paparazzi''. And, yet, they still, ''document'' the truth. And that text, audio, photographic, video, etc., type of information, is what separates the impostors from the real, true, honest, individual.

Just as I am posing in my shir—in my coa—in my coat I have worn on [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|my twenty-fifth birthday FUTURE MESSAGE video]], I wear it now because... I thank you trolls. I thank you for documenting the truth. I thank you for, uh, keepin' it real, and separating me from the false people. I also thank [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]. S—granted, slanderous... still... some... truth. And the original truth is documented in there, somewhere. In the ''history'' [''makes a vague hand-waving gesture'']. Granted that as—as much as you will have gotten from me... and, uh, [''exhales''] all that sort of thing. Oh, and also another reason, because your questions may have gone ignored before, I will, in the future, take one question at a time. And if it is a bad question, I will say... "no comment". So theref... yeah, so, therefore... for all that you have been turn—done—for all that you trolls have... done... you in turn have done for me, an excellent service. Now it is with the Wolf Cub—Wolf Cub Scout salute... I salute you. [''Wolf Scout salute''] Have a good day! [''peace sign''] Stay safe.

[''video cuts'']

Also before I forget, the, ah, current [[SingStar Challenge|SingStar contest]], between me and [[Liquid Chris|the impostor in the brown stripes]]... '''I know your naaaaaaame''', Mr. Toys-R-Us giraaaaaafe! His name! Only cut in half. Use the first name. Anyway, the contest shall continue, for the fun of it. Aaaand I hope he will enjoy the song I have in my mind [''points to head''] that God has entrusted me to relay, for ''him'' to sing, that he enjoys it, and sees the meaning. The Lord loves us... [''puts hand over heart''] by our own name... [[Christopher's name change|our own true honest name]].

===From the Description sidebar===
{{quotebox|Also, I would like to document that Trolls are there also to make us Grow Up Emotionally. They try to break our spirits, keeping us down. But I still get back up and stand, Standing up for the things I know are right. I Dare to keep my Dreams and Love Alive.

<nowiki>**And, I would like to take this moment to offer my most Humble Apologies, now that I have a fuller understanding of things.</nowiki>

-I am sorry, [[Michael Snyder]], for acting the way I did; it's your Television, and I should have respected you. 
-I am sorry, [[Mary Lee Walsh]], You got the complaints from other people; You had your orders; You shattered my heart. Now, as I will soon draw you out of the comic pages as the villain, I forgive you for your misdeed of Heart-Shattering, and I would like very much to put this behind us after almost 6 years. 
-I am sorry, Megan Schroeder, I should have not been soo touchy-feely. I was feeling elated and excited; I meant no discomfort, and for the discomfort I have caused unto you, I apologize. 
-[[Daniel Mimms]] and [[Lucas]], I still do not understand your beef against me, but I apologize for having my mother and father confront you that night, and if you will let me know what I have done wrong unto you to cause you grief, I will be happy to listen and fully comprehend. 

Thank You, Trolls. 
Thank You, Encyclopedia Dramatica. 
Thank You, Loyal Fans. CWCipedia is the NEW Official Sonichu & Rosechu Site; Enjoy. 
Thank You All. :) }}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[That Goatee WILL Grow Back]]|nextlink=[[Exposing Jeff]]|}}
{{Captain's Log}}
{{The_Cwcivil_War_of_2009}}

[[Category:Captain's log entries| 2009-08-03]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2009| 2009-08-03]]
[[Category:Liquid Saga videos| 2009-08-03]]
[[Category:Videos published to IBAChandler]]

NO D*** WAY, IMPOSTOR!!!

2026-06-06T06:17:44Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

{{quote|SONICHU AND ROSECHU ARE MINE ALONE.| Chris, barely remembering what this was supposedly all about}}

[[Image:Sonichu Rosechu Save McIntire by Cwcipedia.jpg|thumb|Save it to the extreme, you two!]]

'''NO D*** WAY, IMPOSTOR!!!''' is a video uploaded on 14 [[August 2009]]. This is [[Ian Brandon Anderson]]'s response to [[Liquid Chris]]'s [[CChanSonichuCWC_Videos, August-November 2009#I, Christian Weston Chandler of Ruckersville, Virginia, Have Grown Up.|finale]], which Ian was unsatisfied with and felt that there was unfinished business between the two of them. The title is [[Chris and censorship|censored for unknown reasons]], despite Ian's use of uncensored profanity in the video itself.

The video contains the first appearance of Ian's sign to save [[McIntire Park]], which appears later in a video recorded from [[Charlottesville]] [[Chris in the media#Save McIntire Park|public access television]]. [[CWC Public Disclaimer|Yet again]], he rattles off his [[Honest Content|personal]] [[14 Branchland Court|info]] in order to somehow prove he's the real Chris.

Ian also bellows an unusually deep, borderline [[Beel|demonic]] [[Death threats|death threat]] against Liquid between statements about how he should be arrested for identity theft, before wrapping the video up by firing a [[curse-ye-ha-me-ha]] at his counterpart in the most [[Autism|spectacular]] display of the attack in all of Christory.

==Video==
{{Tardrage|1=border:7px dashed #ff8800|2=dangerous}}
{{Infobox/video
| name = NO D*** WAY, IMPOSTOR<nowiki>!!!</nowiki>
| ytid = aOde2tFfLkU
| stardate = 14 [[August 2009]]
| maker = [[Ian Brandon Anderson]]
| subject = {{Violence|text}}
| style = {{Rage|text}}
| saga = {{Liquid|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[CWC Public Disclaimer]]
| next = [[The Contest NEVER was to Determine Who was Who]]
}}

{{quote|He's the impostor, I'M the real deal.}}

=== Transcript ===
''Oh'' no you don't, Chris! '''You're''' not getting away that easy! You do all that, [[Chris and the Law|I will SUE your sorry ass]]! And I'm 'onna tell [[Shigeru Miyamoto|Nintendo]] in Redmond right away to stop you, because they know as well as I do. I sent them a letter previously, ''months and months ago'', for the origi-for the original printout of the [[Sonichu 0|Number Zero book]]. They know! They have the records! ''They know.'' I have been a customer of them ''for years!'' They have had my money a bunch of times! Long before I made up with Sony and gave them [[Monthly Tugboat|over two th...]] [''suddenly trails off and twitches his neck and left arm, realizing that he's undermined his own point about being a loyal Nintendo customer''] Agh... [''performs [[Homos|an incredibly effeminate, limp-wristed swatting gesture]] toward the camera as he utters an odd squealing sound; he then quickly raises his left arm again, before dropping it''] [[Chris and brand loyalty|Nintendo has like five--over five thousand dollars worth between me and my parents]], but anyway. I'm st... Anyway, you will not... be-you will not [[Speech Impediment|secede]]. [''Points finger at camera''] You are the IMPOSTOR!

[''backs away from the camera''] You are the ''impostor!'' STOP - THAT - BROWN - STRIPED - IN - THE... [''trails off again in confusion''] SHIRT... [''nods head''] WITH THE ''PAPER'' MEDALLION! ''Stop'' that impostor! [''Shows a drawn cardboard, the Sonichu [[McIntire Park]] sign''] '''[[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] are mine ''ALONE!''''' I am ''the'' Christian Weston Chandler, [''begins to speak at a ridiculous speed''] born with the birth name of [[Christopher's name change|Christopher]], February 24th, [[1982]], '''I'm''' the one with [[Bob Chandler|Robert Franklin Chandler, Jr.]] as my father and [[Barbara Ann Weston Chandler]] as my mother, [[14 Branchland Court]], [[Ruckersville]], Virginia 22968, (434) 990-0198! ''STOP'' that ''IMPOSTOR'' bastard who has been posing with ''MY'' name, ''MY'' address, ''MY'' phone number, ''EVERYTHING! '''STOP HIM!'' HE DESERVES ''NOTHING!'''''

{{RageQuote|[[Death threats|DUUUUUHHHHHHIIIIIIIIIEEEEE, YOOOOUUU!]]}}

[''puts sign away; jump cut'']

[''reappears without glasses''] ''Especially'' after that [[CWC Public Disclaimer|disclaimer video I made]], where I told everybody not to buy anything from you. I've warned Nintendo, then [[HEXBox|Microsoft]], and Sony: do not buy anything from ''him'' either. '''He's''' the impostor, I'M the real deal. Look at the ''history'' on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|ED]] and everywhere else. You will rot in ''jail'', mister... Ssss... [[Jail Saga|You will rot in jail]]. Nintendo has known me for years, so long- so much longer, practically my whole lifetime. They ''know'' me. And they know ''you'' to be the ''impostor!'' You go into Nintendo's doors, they ''will'' kick your ass out. Nintendo, Microsoft, Sony, stop him! ''Put him in jail! Call the [[jerkops|police]] on him!'' ...Anybody else in my [[True and Loyal Fanbase|true loyal fanbase]]: do the same thing, please help me, put him in jail when you see his sorry face.

[''jump cut'']

[''Chris is now wearing his glasses again''] And you know what? Let's top this off. [''unsurprisingly, he removes his glasses''] Right now. No "shin", we're going for the original. ''Just'' for that impostor that has worn the brown stripes all this time. ''Hmmm...'' '''''<big>Curse-ye-ha-me-</big>'''''

{{RageQuote|''HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!''}}

[''jump cut'']

Call the police on him. [''[[Stress sigh|sighs irritably]]''] Have a nice day.

==Fan Videos==
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Infinite Rage
| ytid = cGFMDOtZ_To
| Stardate =
| Maker = [[Vivian Gee]]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Blend Sonichu
| video = {{#ev:youtube|XvjrW2X1FeI}}
| stardate = 5 [[November 2017]]
| maker = [https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCuObAUCueXDNZpyhljfQ_kQ Craig Smith]
| subject =
| type =
| info = Smile, Sweet, Sister, Sadistic, Surprise, Service, Sonichu
}}

==See also==
*[[Death threats]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[CWC Public Disclaimer]]|nextlink=[[The Contest NEVER was to Determine Who was Who]]|}}
{{LiquidSaga}}
{{The Cwcivil War of 2009}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2009| 2009-08-14]]
[[Category:Liquid Saga videos| 2009-08-14]]
[[Category:Videos published to IBAChandler]]

Solaray Female Hormone Blend SP-7C

2026-06-05T04:19:35Z

FromtheWordsofBR: This should maybe be merged into the drugs page.

{{Delete}}
{{Merge|Chris and drugs}}
{{stub}}

'''Solaray Female Hormone Blend SP-7C''' is a package of "VegCaps" containing herbal blends.<ref name=amazon>https://www.amazon.com/Solaray-Female-Hormone-Blend-Capsules/dp/B005FYLXR0</ref> Chris purchased a bottle in [[August 2016]] for $15.99, likely as a means to help out with his [[transgender|gender transition]], though the pills are really meant to help with issues like menstruation.{{cite}}

{{References}}
{{Health}}
[[Category:Gender dysphoria]]

Solaray Female Hormone Blend SP-7C

2026-06-05T04:18:20Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

{{Delete}}
{{Merge|Chris and drugs}}
{{stub}}
'''Solaray Female Hormone Blend SP-7C''' is a package of "VegCaps" containing herbal blends.<ref name=amazon>https://www.amazon.com/Solaray-Female-Hormone-Blend-Capsules/dp/B005FYLXR0</ref> Chris purchased a bottle in [[August 2016]] for $15.99.{{cite}}

{{References}}
{{Health}}
[[Category:Gender dysphoria]]

Gratitude for a good person in N.C.

2026-06-05T04:17:07Z

FromtheWordsofBR: Comments were disabled on it a long time ago

{{quote|I remind myself of {{w|Hyacinth Bucket}} in that video.|[[List of Chris's comments on YouTube#Live From China!🔴Chill CWC Stream 30|Chris remembering the video]], [[October 2023]].}}

'''Gratitude for a good person in N.C.''' is a video uploaded by [[Chris]] on 23 [[August 2011]] in which he thanks an anonymous [[White knights|fan]] from [[Animate! Raleigh|North Carolina]] for sending him a laptop, as Chris's dinosaur of a desktop [[computer]] is [[Kitchen|covered in a mass of Hungry-Man boxes and Christmas decorations]]. Despite the title, Chris still finds it necessary to point out how his upgrade has made the laptop [[Chris and his ego|"better."]]

Due to the death of his father 14 days later, this was the last video uploaded personally by Chris, not by a troll or a third-party, until [[CWC Lego Manchester High School Oct 18 2013|November 2013]].

==Description==
{{quotebox|HE/SHE WILL be getting a hand-written Thank You Letter.}}

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = Gratitude for a good person in N.C.
| ytid = eih4mhp1TQM
| stardate = 23 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Website|[[White Knight]]}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}
| saga = {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = Mix 107.3 Shirt
| previous = [[Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David]]
| next = [[Victory Rockout]]
}}

{{quote|... contribute towards the execution of trolls and cyberbullies...}}

== Transcript ==

And now at this moment, I would like to etspress... ''[in a very poor English accent]'' a note of gratitude from a fan from the state of en-''ceeee''... for sending me his or her old laptop... computah.

''[flips camera around to show a dark blue HP laptop]''

Secondhand, but it works very well! I had it checked... and it contains no viruses, but still... ''[displays the [[claw of fail|claw]] and cocks eyebrow]'' I upgraded it, and it is bettah! It is like brand-new! So, thank you very much, fan from North Carolina, for sending me... ''[turns to the laptop]'' ''[[Nazis|ze]]'' laptop!

And if anybody else wishes to contribute towards the [[Sonichu 10|execution]] of trolls and cyberbullies so that nobody else will have to be victim, you may feel free to- you may feel free to contribute in any way that you see fit, generously and pleasantly!

Thank you very much.
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David]]|nextlink=[[Victory Rockout]]}}

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011| 2011-08-23 c]]
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]
[[Category: Kodak camera videos| 2011-08-23 c]]
[[Category:Videos published to ChristianWChandler]]

May 2026

2026-06-02T20:37:37Z

FromtheWordsofBR: Brainfart

[[File:May22 2026 Helsinki cropped.jpeg|thumb|Chris and Flutter in May]]

'''May''' was the fifth month of [[2026]]. It saw the usual Transformers videos, a trip to [[Finland]], and Chris getting his Instagram account hacked by a crypto scammer.

==Notable events==
* '''1 May'''
** Chris publishes [[Transformers of Cwcville Short - Decepticlone Orientation Video]] and its subtitled version.
** Chris publishes [[Dimension Merge Manifestions Are Going]].
* '''2 May''' - As preparation for his eighth trip to [[Finland]], Chris updates his availability notice on [[Cameo]] saying that he will not be available until 3 [[August 2026]].
* '''8 May'''
** Chris publishes [[Light Powered Cwclight Reviews - Changables 1989 Wave 2]].
** Chris publishes [[Changeable Scouts, Part 2 (Transformers of Cwcville Short)]] and its subtitled version.
* '''15 May''' - Chris publishes [[Gwenmi Mikoto Takes Off (Transformers of Cwcville Short)]] and its subtitled version. These are skits Chris cut from the ''Light Powered Cwclight Reviews - Gwenmi Mikoto'' video.
* '''22 May'''
** Chris and [[Flutter]] are spotted at Forum, a shopping mall in Helsinki, Finland.<ref>[[Sightings_(2026)#Forum Shopping Centre, Helsinki, Finland]]</ref>
** Chris publishes [[Light Powered Cwclight Reviews - Changables 1990 Wave 3]].
** Chris publishes [[Changeable Scouts, Part 3 (Transformers of Cwcville Short)]] and its subtitled version.
** Chris complains in a skit from the above videos and on social media about [[DrWolf]] never responding to him.<ref>[[May 2026 social media posts#Complaining about lack of response from DRWolf]]</ref>
* '''29 May'''
** Chris publishes [[Light Powered Cwclight Reviews - Gwenmi Mikoto - Updated]].
** Chris publishes [[Crackder Number 64127's Party (Transformers of Cwcville Short)]] and its subtitled version.
* '''31 May''' - Chris's Instagram account [[May 2026 social media posts#Addressing the $SONICHU token|promotes a crypto coin after being hacked]].

==Activity==

===Posts===
*[[May 2026 social media posts]]

===Sightings===
*[[Sightings (2026)#May|Sightings (2026)]]

===Videos===
*[[Transformers of Cwcville Short - Decepticlone Orientation Video - Subtitled]]
*[[Transformers of Cwcville Short - Decepticlone Orientation Video]]
*[[Dimension Merge Manifestions Are Going]]
*[[Light Powered Cwclight Reviews - Changables 1989 Wave 2]]
*[[Changeable Scouts, Part 2 (Transformers of Cwcville Short)]]
*[[Changeable Scouts, Part 2 (Transformers of Cwcville Short) (Subtitled)]]
*[[Gwenmi Mikoto Takes Off (Transformers of Cwcville Short)]]
*[[Gwenmi Mikoto Takes Off (Transformers of Cwcville Short) (Subtitled)]]
*[[Light Powered Cwclight Reviews - Changables 1990 Wave 3]]
*[[Changeable Scouts, Part 3 (Transformers of Cwcville Short) (Subtitled)]]
*[[Changeable Scouts, Part 3 (Transformers of Cwcville Short)]]
* [[Light Powered Cwclight Reviews - Gwenmi Mikoto - Updated]]
* [[Crackder Number 64127's Party (Transformers of Cwcville Short)]]
* [[Crackder Number 64127's Party (Transformers of Cwcville Short) (Subtitled)]]

{{References}}
{{timeline}}

May 2026

2026-06-02T20:37:26Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

[[File:May22 2026 Helsinki cropped.jpeg|thumb|Chris and Flutter in May]]

'''May''' was the sixth month of [[2026]]. It saw the usual Transformers videos, a trip to [[Finland]], and Chris getting his Instagram account hacked by a crypto scammer.

==Notable events==
* '''1 May'''
** Chris publishes [[Transformers of Cwcville Short - Decepticlone Orientation Video]] and its subtitled version.
** Chris publishes [[Dimension Merge Manifestions Are Going]].
* '''2 May''' - As preparation for his eighth trip to [[Finland]], Chris updates his availability notice on [[Cameo]] saying that he will not be available until 3 [[August 2026]].
* '''8 May'''
** Chris publishes [[Light Powered Cwclight Reviews - Changables 1989 Wave 2]].
** Chris publishes [[Changeable Scouts, Part 2 (Transformers of Cwcville Short)]] and its subtitled version.
* '''15 May''' - Chris publishes [[Gwenmi Mikoto Takes Off (Transformers of Cwcville Short)]] and its subtitled version. These are skits Chris cut from the ''Light Powered Cwclight Reviews - Gwenmi Mikoto'' video.
* '''22 May'''
** Chris and [[Flutter]] are spotted at Forum, a shopping mall in Helsinki, Finland.<ref>[[Sightings_(2026)#Forum Shopping Centre, Helsinki, Finland]]</ref>
** Chris publishes [[Light Powered Cwclight Reviews - Changables 1990 Wave 3]].
** Chris publishes [[Changeable Scouts, Part 3 (Transformers of Cwcville Short)]] and its subtitled version.
** Chris complains in a skit from the above videos and on social media about [[DrWolf]] never responding to him.<ref>[[May 2026 social media posts#Complaining about lack of response from DRWolf]]</ref>
* '''29 May'''
** Chris publishes [[Light Powered Cwclight Reviews - Gwenmi Mikoto - Updated]].
** Chris publishes [[Crackder Number 64127's Party (Transformers of Cwcville Short)]] and its subtitled version.
* '''31 May''' - Chris's Instagram account [[May 2026 social media posts#Addressing the $SONICHU token|promotes a crypto coin after being hacked]].

==Activity==

===Posts===
*[[May 2026 social media posts]]

===Sightings===
*[[Sightings (2026)#May|Sightings (2026)]]

===Videos===
*[[Transformers of Cwcville Short - Decepticlone Orientation Video - Subtitled]]
*[[Transformers of Cwcville Short - Decepticlone Orientation Video]]
*[[Dimension Merge Manifestions Are Going]]
*[[Light Powered Cwclight Reviews - Changables 1989 Wave 2]]
*[[Changeable Scouts, Part 2 (Transformers of Cwcville Short)]]
*[[Changeable Scouts, Part 2 (Transformers of Cwcville Short) (Subtitled)]]
*[[Gwenmi Mikoto Takes Off (Transformers of Cwcville Short)]]
*[[Gwenmi Mikoto Takes Off (Transformers of Cwcville Short) (Subtitled)]]
*[[Light Powered Cwclight Reviews - Changables 1990 Wave 3]]
*[[Changeable Scouts, Part 3 (Transformers of Cwcville Short) (Subtitled)]]
*[[Changeable Scouts, Part 3 (Transformers of Cwcville Short)]]
* [[Light Powered Cwclight Reviews - Gwenmi Mikoto - Updated]]
* [[Crackder Number 64127's Party (Transformers of Cwcville Short)]]
* [[Crackder Number 64127's Party (Transformers of Cwcville Short) (Subtitled)]]

{{References}}
{{timeline}}

May 2009

2026-05-31T20:58:09Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

[[Image:SchuComicSP2P2.jpg|thumb|On '''12 May 2009''', the wedding comic is leaked.]]
[[Image:IvyWedding.jpg|thumb|On '''15 May 2009''', the [[Ivy]] Saga comes to a close.]]
[[Image:Happybday.jpg|thumb|On '''29 May 2009''', Chris shocks the [[Internet]] yet again with his [[naïve]] [[narcissism]].]]

'''May''' was the fifth month of '''[[2009]]'''. As the month began, Chris still held a very strong belief in his relationship with [[Ivy]], spending the first few days uploading several videos specifically dedicated to her. However, things quickly went south, as an attempt from [[Joshua Martinez]] to swindle Chris out of his money set off a chain of dominoes that would eventually result in Ivy breaking up with Chris. Because of this disappointment, during the last weeks of May, Chris began resorting to other ways to find a girlfriend. He starts going out in public again, and also posts an ad on [[Craigslist]].

This period is also noted for Chris making a number of appearances in the mainstream media, being discussed on popular sites like Fark and at least three different radio shows, thus making him open for the grand public.

==Events of May 2009==
* '''Sometime this month (between 4 to 14 May)''' - Chris's relationship with Ivy ends due to a complicated series of events:
** [[Joshua Martinez|Josh]] decided to troll Chris once again by conning him out of his money. He sold him a PSP at an inflated price, claiming it had special features, in trade for Chris's old PSP, which he wanted to give to [[Vanessa Hudgens]]. After realizing he was scammed, Chris tried getting Josh back by writing him a bad check (allegedly, Ivy told him to cancel the check, but Chris refused to return the PSP out of fear of upsetting Vanessa).<ref name="Ivy">[[Ivy Q&A#The End]]</ref>
** Chris was told by Rocky to inform his parents about this event.<ref>[[Ivy Q&A#Comics]]</ref> Bob, who at this point had been hiding troll information from Barb, felt this was the final straw, and decided troll activity was getting serious enough to warrant police attention. They agreed to go to the police with Rocky Shoemaker to talk to them about Josh. However, Rocky blindsided the trio by asking the police to investigate ''all'' of Chris's trolls, including Ivy; this went against Bob and Barb's wishes, who wanted to only deal with Josh and take on the others at their own time and pace.<ref name="Ivy"/>
** Ivy, angry over this fiasco, told Chris she was breaking up with him over his betrayal. Chris, unable to accept things were over, repeatedly called Ivy for two days straight, only stopping when she and her dad called Bob to get Chris to quit it.<ref name="Ivy"/>
* '''1 May'''
** Chris [[For My Sweetest Ivy|describes]] his plans with [[Ivy]] after she arrives at the airport.
** Chris [[CWC Address to Unilever About AXE|uploads two videos]] to persuade Unilever to discourage [[homos]] from using [[Axe]] grooming products.
** Chris includes links on [[cwcville.com]] to [[quizzes]] about himself and his godless creations.
* '''3 May'''
** Chris creates a bunch of new [[quizzes]].
** Chris creates a page about himself on [[Wikipedia]] in his userspace. It is promptly deleted for violation of what Wikipedia accepts in userspace.
** Chris [[Captain's Log, Stardate May 3rd, 2009|makes his case to Wikipedia]] for restoring his article.
** A page for ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' is created on TV Tropes.<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20090528095533/http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Sonichu Sonichu page on TV Tropes, circa May 2009]</ref> It is also added to one of the site's lists of webcomics.<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20090614174204/http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/NotableFanWebcomics Notable Fan Webcomics page on TV Tropes]</ref>
* '''4 May''' - [[Cogsdev]] founds the [[CWCipedia]].
* '''5 May''' - Chris's memorable video [[ECV 00095]] is linked to from Fark<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20141212161513/http://www.fark.com/cgi/vidplayer.pl?IDLink=4369161 Fark - You don't need to search any longer, the creepiest person on the internet has been found (possible Not safe for work language)]</ref>, leading to 200,000+ views in 24 hours, and attention Chris could only have dreamed of on that fateful day he created Sonichu.
* '''8 May''' - ECV 00095 is linked to from [[Something Awful]], for their Awfulvision feature. A whole new legion of admirers and detractors is born.
* '''9 May''' - Chris [[Chris-chan helps Julia with her addiction|messages]] back a [[drug]] addict after they sent him a voice mail while high.
* '''11 May''' - Chris writes an essay named ''Chris Chan’s Heroic Dream for Our Community NOW and in the Future. The Solution: Dating Education'', and sends it in for the 2009 Community Support Contest sponsored by C-Ville's Battlefield Ford. He does not win. The essay can be read at [https://web.archive.org/web/20111029204355/http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Dating_Education CWCipedia].
* '''12 May'''
** The [[Wedding Comic]] and several erotic drawings are leaked.
** Chris's [[I Got A Fish]] and For My Sweetest Ivy videos are featured and discussed on [[Toucher and Rich Segment|the morning show of Boston radio station WBCN]]. His video admitting being a cum-guzzler was also discussed on [[The Kevin and Bean Show Segment|The Kevin and Bean Show]] on Los Angeles's KROQ.
* '''14 May''' - Someone claiming to be Chris posts to the talk page on Chris's [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page, saying that he knows that Ivy is a troll, and that his heart is shattered. It is not known if this is Chris, but it is consistent with events at the time.
* '''15 May'''
** [[cwcville.com]] is compromised and displays a message slamming Chris for not keeping his promise of making new comics to his loyal fans.
** Videos addressed to Ivy are removed from Chris's [[YouTube]] account. This leads to [[Clyde Cash]] finally confirming that Ivy and Chris are through.
* '''16 May'''
** cwcville.com is compromised (again) and displays a message slamming Chris for thinking that he was really in contact with [[Vanessa Hudgens]]. Also contains an image of [[Joshua Martinez]], suggesting that he hacked the site.
** Rumors surface about Chris going out to the mall on a new [[Love Quest]], or possibly even a [[Fuck Quest]].
* '''17 May''' - The message on cwcville.com is changed to Joshua Martinez bragging about having sex with Vanessa Hudgens, and nude photos of her are added to the site.
* '''18 May''' - The message on cwcville.com is changed again, with a crudely edited picture of Chris at a gay pride event. A new message says that Vanessa was real and she has had sex with Joshua.
* '''19 May'''
** In his first video since the Ivy debacle, Chris [[CWC only accepts IN-PERSON FEMALE Encounters|declares]] that women must meet him in person instead of e-mails and phone calls. The Removal of Glasses maneuver returns. "FIND ME IN PERSON AT YOUR OWN PRESSED LUCK."
** [[Cwcville.com]] goes offline.
* '''22 May''' - Chris [[Captain's Log, Stardate May 22nd, 2009|declares]] he has abandoned cwcville.com, tells his [[fans]] to attack the trolls and also shows his new Sonichu [[medallion]]. [[The Miscreants]] later report that [[Clyde Cash]] is found dead in his home.
* '''27 May''' - The aforementioned video where Chris admitted to drinking cum is ridiculed by the nationally syndicated radio show [[Opie and Anthony]].
* '''29 May'''
** Chris discovers a video wishing "Chris-Chan" a happy birthday (now deleted), and assumes it must be meant for him. [[:Image:Happybday.jpg|His obnoxious comment]] results in a shitstorm, as the internet floods the poor girl's account with everybody's favorite game, [[Kick the Autistic]].
** Chris checks his [[PSN]] account to discover that [[Clyde Cash]] hacked it and made two purchases amounting to $15.98 on Chris's account. He [[Vivian Gee E-mails, 2009|sends an e-mail]] to [[Vivian Gee]] demanding for his money back, but Vivian tells him she can't.
* '''30 May''' - Chris posts a [[:Image:Cwc_on_craigslist.jpg|Craigslist ad]] saying that he wants a 18 to 27 year-old boyfriend-free girl who is not [[niggo|black]].
* '''31 May'''
** Chris's [[Craigslist]] ad is removed from the site on the grounds of racism.
** Chris's [[Facebook]] account is hacked by [[The Miscreants]], revealing lulzy correspondences with local women and some interesting notes. Chris's main profile is defaced with his [[butt garments]] image.

==References==
<references/>

{{Timeline}}
[[Category:Chronology]]

Chris's Last Will and Testament

2026-05-29T20:55:02Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

{{SonichuPossession}}
'''Chris's Last Will and Testament''', titled by Chris as '''IMG_0176.MOV''', is a video produced by Chris and privately uploaded to his [[Google Drive]] in the evening hours of 6 [[August 2020]]. For unknown reasons Chris had grown incredibly morose near the time of creation of this video and felt the need to create a will, he later sent this video to [[Naught]], who got deeply concerned after looking at the contents and decided to leak it.

In the video, Chris, under [[Spirit possession|the possession of Sonichu]], prepares to leave his belongings to [[MKRNightVee]] and Kai/[[Kevin Fairchild]] for when his body completes its travel to [[Dimensions#C-197|Dimension C-197]]. According to [[Naught]], Chris had initially chosen him to receive his belongings; Naught suggested Chris leave them to MKRNightVee instead.<ref>[[The Place chats (August 2020)#Last Will Beneficiary]]</ref> Throughout the video, Chris repeatedly breaks the kayfabe of LARPing as Sonichu delivering Chris's will and instead refers to himself in first-person.

==Background==
[[Naught]] made [[User:Ihasnoname|a CWCki account]] and released the video by making a page on this wiki (which has since been deleted). In his statement, Naught - a habitual liar - also made some unsubstantiated accusations against [[Kai]].

The text reads:

{{quotebox|August 6th 2020 cwcs new best irl and [[Dungeons and Dragons|d&d]] <nowiki>friend has cwc isolated in a discord server. Luckily one of cwcs close friend's got me in the server out of genuine concern (thanks) which after watching this video you too may feel a similar unease. Caution: Intense & sad. https://drive.google.com/file/d/185tEr63kYq_oa64y8ojQF-jZ4o-5nNeY/view?usp=drivesdk</nowiki>

<nowiki>Link to the server with Kai & cwc. https://discord.gg/WvAQErG</nowiki>

<nowiki>For the record the power's to be were warned about Kai/Kevin Fairchild; To be fair fact is on paper cwc is legally an adult. Regardless Kai has already taken money from cwc for 'groceries' and 'raid shadow legends' purchases. Kai/Kevin has gotten cwc into Egyptian Myths Kai even claims he's married to the goddess Isis to name one. link title Source <img src="content://com.samsung.android.memo/file/d7faf221-a884-d146-0000-0173c768367d" orientation="0" altText="Screenshot_20200806-185241_Messages.jpg.png" width="608" /></nowiki> Ongoing..}}

Chris discussed the video in DMs with Naught.<ref>[[Naught DMs#6 August 2020]]</ref>

==Legal Worth==
Unsurprising, this video is worth little in terms of being an actual will. For one, a will must be in writing (Virginia allows handwritten wills if two disinterested parties can attest to the authenticity of the handwriting) and have two competent witnesses (who are not beneficiaries) to begin to be valid. Even if Chris supplemented the video with the required paperwork, the will could easily be revoked on the grounds that Chris was not sound of mind or under duress when making the will.<ref>https://eforms.com/wills/virginia-last-will-and-testament-template/</ref>

However, on 8 [[September 2021]], Chris wrote in his [[Goddess Log]] that he "now [has] a will that is noterized [sic]." It is seemingly implied that this happened after or because of a suicide threat Chris made while in jail.

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = IMG_0176.MOV
| ytid = icv7RQ9HPQg
| stardate = 6 [[August 2020]]
| subject = {{Other|[[Chris and death|Death]]}}, {{Reality|text}}
| style = {{Tragedy|text}}, {{Crazy|text}}
| shirt = {{Bubblegumnightmare|text}}
| other = {{Leaked|text}}
| previous = [[Analysis_Anarchy_Reaction_Livestreams#Watching_TF2_Analysis_Anarchy_Red_Vs_Blue_Part_3|Watching TF2 Analysis Anarchy Red Vs Blue Part 3]]
| next = [[Bonus short update from Barb 09/04/2020]]
}}

==Transcript==

''[Chris is sitting at a desk in his room with the camera on it, showing him from his shoulders up.]''

Hmm, hello, this is... Hello! This is Sonichu in... ''[takes off glasses]'' the body of mama, Christine Weston Chander Sonichu. Ok, Chris-Chan Sonichu.

Anyway, I am recording this, as a video will, with my wife Rosey-Rosechu standing next to me, for in the oca- for in the event, anything happens to me, ''[points at himself]'' in this, one body, that belongs to mama Chris-Chan, if anything happens, including, the very likely just ''[poof]'', [[Dimensional_Merge|vanish from this dimension]], this body and me? And, this house gets left behind, and, anything else that happens and transpire in this timeline, before the timeline changes, I wish to hereby, bequeath, all my remaining posse- all of... the remaining possessions between mine, and mama's that are in, and aro- this household, in- within the area of this [[14 Branchland Court|Temple]]...

I relinquish all- I will relinquish all that... to [[MKRNightVee|Meghan Kathleen Ringo]], who lives in the state of, Washington ''[Nervously licks his lips]''... so, simply, she will- simply, sh- had to be sure to come over to come, to help, sort things out, and if she f- if she feels like it she can move in and help- as well, but that's a whole 'nother thing. That's a FAN going ''click-click-click-click-click-click'' the air conditioner just died out, so ''[shrugs]'' I had to take that as a sign.

Uh, anyway- aside from that, um, also, another note... that's set, but I would also... like to... also help out around the house, who lives here within the state of Virginia, one, [[Kevin Fairchild]], who lives in [[Dox|Fishersville]], I'd like him to... [[Barbara]]! You're gonna [[Chris and his ego#Entitlement|let him]] move in! You're gonna let him move in, he gonna help you with any remaining things, and artifacts within this house. And, Meghan you'll have to work with him as well, he's very genuine, very kind, I believe you both will get along very well.

And this, will definitely work out because you know me, I'm going, into [[C-197]] ''[Points to C-197]'', our alternate dimension, and I'm gonna end up, uh, powering up this body, unlocking its- all of its alternate forms, and everything... I'm- you know me I'm a little bit ''[Shrugs right shoulder suggestively]'' this BRAIN IS SO DISORGANISED!!! ''[Bangs the side of his head with the heel of his hand]'', so body language is not exactly shyn- syncing up at times. But yeah... anyway, everything goes to... everything of- Chris- everything of... mine and Christine Weston Chandler Shonichu's ''[Makes hand gestures]'', they go to... Meghan Kathleen Ringo, and... I want Kevin Fairchild to come and move in, as well, because Barbara's gonna need as much help as possible, on the event that this house, this Temple, just stays behind, while, if the event that I ''[Points at himself]'' just suddenly vanish, without this house ''[Adjusts hair]'' and leaving it and everything else behind, and in that case also, uh, being obvious, this body would not stand by because it's [[Chris and his ego|ONE AND ONLY]] it's, one and only, the eyes, linked to this one brain! If you only knew, camera, ''[slurs a string of zeroes of indeterminate length, whilst making a "continuing to infinity" gesture]''... of everybody else, the TRUE first person perspective. ''[grasps a lock of his hair in each hand]''

So many things in my mind, so please pardon me if I seem a little bit erratic, but... This is my, last video will, and testament, on behalf of, Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu, who was born as [[Christopher's name change|Christopher Weston Chandler]], to Barbara and [[Robert]] Chandler in this dimension, in this timeline. I'll leave you all with that, and, the attorney, who will handle the... case and all that, and, helping... them at all, or, anybody else helping them get situated with the situation and all that, so, thank you.

==References==
<references/>
{{Template:LeakedVideos}}
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Analysis_Anarchy_Reaction_Livestreams#Watching_TF2_Analysis_Anarchy_Red_Vs_Blue_Part_3|Watching TF2 Analysis Anarchy Red Vs Blue Part 3]]|nextlink=[[Bonus short update from Barb 09/04/2020]]}}
[[Category: Chris-chan videos, 2020]]

Chris Kisses Rosechu

2026-05-29T20:55:00Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

{{SonichuPossession}}

'''Chris Kisses Rosechu''' (officially named '''P1000037.MP4''') is a video recorded on 23 [[February 2021]], and leaked on 15 [[August 2021]], where Chris, [[Spirit possession#Sonichu|whilst possessed by Sonichu]], pretends to kiss an imaginary [[Rosechu]] in the [[Wikipedia:Goochland, Virginia|Goochland]] Public Library while an unknown cameraman, likely [[Caden Peck]],<ref group = note>Voice sounds similar to one in [https://twitter.com/glndschools/status/1179777349564456960 a video clip produced by Caden] for his school district.</ref> records him. In the video, the cameraman brings up an idea for a Sonichu movie, which Chris appears to have been on board with.

The video was leaked on the [[Kiwi Farms]] in August 2021 after the email account of a person associated with [[Isabella Loretta Janke]] was hacked into.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/shroom-ilj-girl-email-hack-new-leaked-cwc-vid.98587/</ref> Most notably, the video was addressed to [[Praetor]]'s email address, meaning that this video is likely a result of, or is at least related to [[Weening|their activities]].

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = P1000037.MP4
| ytid = 7Sq8AT5Yc5E
| stardate = 23 [[February 2021]]
| maker = [[Caden Peck]]
| subject = {{Reality|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga = {{Praetor|text}}
| shirt = {{theclassic2.0|text}}
| other = {{Leaked|text}}
| previous = [[Fan visits#Aggravating Art (2021)|CHRIS CHAN DRIP OUT]]
| next = [[Cover song: “I’ll Be Your Mirror” by Velvet Underground]]
}}

==Transcript==
[''Chris leans against the wall as the cameraman, Caden, takes a step forward'']

'''Caden''': Roll it. So you can do different poses if you want, you can, uh- that's a good one.

[''Caden starts walking towards Chris, who walks away from the wall'']

'''Caden''': I'm gonna move over here for a second just to try and get a 360 view.

[''Caden walks back, and Chris scurries back to where he was standing'']

'''Caden''': Alright. Great, great...

'''<s>Chris</s> Sonichu:''' [''Pointing at the air''] This is where I got Rosie right here. S-she's... being attacked right now.

'''Caden''': I got you.

'''<s>Chris</s> Sonichu:''' [''Holds his hand awkwardly at waist level''] So, my hands are on her shoulder. And this is me making out with her. [''Bends down, and starts slobbering with the air'']

'''Caden''': Ah.

[''A few seconds of Chris awkwardly making out with the air while making "mmm" noises passes, with the cameraman filming slightly closer'']

'''<s>Chris</s> Sonichu:''' [''Stands up, smiling and slightly chuckling'']

'''Caden''': That's good. That was good. Gosh... so, would you want Rosechu to be within this movie as a CGI character or as a, uh, fursuit character?

'''<s>Chris</s> Sonichu:''' Ohhh, [[Speech impediment|everybo-, all- every...]] we gotta have her as CGI as well.

'''Caden''': Yeah.

'''<s>Chris</s> Sonichu:''' We gotta do CGI with pretty much all the Sonichus and Rosechus, pretty much.

'''Caden''': That's not a problem. That's not a problem. Alright, I'm gonna stop on one more shot here.

[''Chris returns to awkwardly holding his hand at waist level'']

'''Caden''': Just kinda holding it straight... Excellent, and-

[''Video abruptly ends'']

==See also==
*[[Goochland Library Sermon]], another Praetor video filmed at the Goochland library
{{Notes}}
{{References}}
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[CHRIS CHAN DRIP OUT]]|nextlink=[[Cover song: “I’ll Be Your Mirror” by Velvet Underground]]}}

[[Category:Leaked videos]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, 2021]]
{{Template:LeakedVideos}}

Direct Message to Hasbro: MLPG5 Is Cancelled.

2026-05-29T20:54:57Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

{{Quote|It is absolutely mind-boggling that Chris' last ever video online is essentially a 'Classic Chris' rant. This genuinely feels like [[Saga|some kind of arc, coming full circle.]]|YouTube commenter 'humanskin', reflecting on the rant and the events that came to follow its release.}}

{{quote|My action was just for the justice and safety of our universe and our timeline, here.|Chris on why he made the video.<ref name=wct></ref>}}

'''Direct Message to Hasbro: MLPG5 Is Cancelled.''' is a [[YouTube]] video produced and uploaded by [[Christian Weston Chandler|Chris]] on 27 [[July 2021]], and was the last video Chris uploaded before [[Jail Saga|being arrested]]. Chris went out with not a whimper, but [[Chris and sex#Incest|a bang]] by releasing his first rant video in a long time.

Earlier in the day, Chris had encountered several toys for the latest generation - G5 - of ''[[My Little Pony]]'' at a local [[Wal-Mart]] and Target. As G5 is a reboot of the franchise, Chris was strongly opposed to it proceeding and had complained to IP owner Hasbro about it in the past. Chris used [[magical thinking]] to believe he used his powers to phase the toys out of existence. When Chris returned home, he was still enraged over the matter and decided to record a video demanding Hasbro to cancel the cartoon and toy line for ''My Little Pony'' G5.<ref name=react>[[The Knights of CWC chats (July 2021)#Triggered by MLP G5 Toys]]</ref>

After Chris uploaded the video, [[Watchman]] [[The WCT]] reached out, concerned over Chris's display of aggression and asking him not to hurt himself and to talk things out instead, to whom Chris promised that he had no intention of hurting himself and agreed to talk. Chris claimed that he was not angry about "trivial" details such as the G5 character designs but was instead upset over his belief that the G5 series was "Not supposed to exist at all in this timeline until After Season Fourteen of G4."<ref name=wct>[[WCT DMs#Upset at MLP G5]]</ref>

Due to his incarceration, this was the last video uploaded personally by Chris, not by a troll or a third-party, until [[October 2023]], with the [[Jesus Christ Chan Sonichu Prime Resurrected and Returned]] video.

==Background and analysis==
[[Image:Arrestchu.jpeg|thumb|"If you don't cancel G5, you're going to put this ENTIRE TIMELINE in chaos!"]]

In the video, Chris insists that the previous iteration of the show, ''My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic'', run for 5 more seasons, in yet another [[Chris and oratory|one of his lengthy speeches]]. Instead of the usual threats, Chris simply states to Hasbro that by not canceling the reboot, [[Chris and reality|they will inadvertently cause disorder in this timeline]] – because we all know that the most important thing to the safety of the world is the cancelation of a rebooted cartoon promoting plastic pony toys and the continuation of its previous iteration. From Chris's perspective, things like [[COVID-19|a global pandemic]], world hunger, climate change, and ongoing wars and conflicts compromising national security can wait later, and will probably be solved by the [[Dimensional Merge]] anyway, and are comparatively less important because they don't directly affect him.

This video is perhaps the most prominent display of [[Chris and anger|Chris's rage]] since [[CLog 10042017 - Q&A NO MORE|the end of his relationship with Jessica Quinn]], which seems particularly jarring after he'd spent months tweeting messages of peace and encouraging faux-[[meditation]] practices.<ref>[[April 2021 social media posts#Preparing for The Merge]]</ref><ref>[[June 2021 social media posts#Meditiation]]</ref><ref>[[July 2021 social media posts#Meditation question]]</ref> Chris's anger here, aside from being indicative of his usual resistance to change, may also reflect him subconsciously understanding that his [[magical thinking]] will not influence the business decisions affecting [[Chris and brand loyalty|the brands that he loves so much]]. It's also possible that Chris stopped taking estrogen in the recent past to prepare for [[Affair with Mother|his incestuous affair]], which may have fueled a more aggressive response.

Unusually for Chris, this video was shot in his bathroom.<ref name=react></ref> The video not only showcases more of the hoard in [[14 Branchland Court]] but also reveals that one of the bathroom walls now has several dents. Some passive observers have speculated that Chris may have punched these holes in the wall out of anger before he filmed the video. However, Chris claims that the dents were really his attempts to practice for the day that he physically destroys [[Iron Curtain|the wall]] separating humans from their [[OCs]], and have been there for an unspecified amount of time.<ref name=wct></ref> [[List of Chris's lies|Considering how often he lies about embarrassing things he's done]], it is not fully certain whether or not Chris was being honest. Neither he nor [[Barbara Chandler|Barb]] appeared to have said anything about it beforehand, and given [[The Journey to the Merge|the extent of Chris's delusions]], it is not entirely out of the realm of possibility for Chris to have legitimately believed he was breaking into another dimension.

This recklessness, along with the rant included in the video (not to mention his prior debacle with ''[[Sonic Boom Protests|Sonic Boom]]''), left many concerned with the current state of [[Chris and mental healthcare|Chris's already deteriorating mental health]]. It is feared that he could eventually devolve into breaking other things, or even causing physical harm to others, either out of a mixture of his delusions or anger. It certainly didn't help that Chris planned to attend [[Everfree Northwest]] in a matter of weeks when he recorded the video, where MLP G5 content almost certainly would've been showcased. However, due to the [[Incest Call]] being brought to light, Chris was banned from attending the convention. On September 24, 2021, the animated film ''My Little Pony: A New Generation'' was released on Netflix, which will subsequently air a full animated series in 2022 to replace ''Friendship is Magic'', with Hasbro choosing not to heed Chris's warning and nothing significantly disastrous occurring as a result.

This video is also very noteworthy for being the final video that Chris recorded and uploaded to his Youtube channel before he was arrested on 1 [[August 2021]] due to the aforementioned incest situation regarding his own mother, [[Barbara Chandler]]. In a way, Chris was correct about the timeline being put into a state of chaos. [[Jail Saga|If only we had taken him seriously.]]

==Video==
{{Tardrage|1=border:12px double rgb(255,0,0)|2=EXTREME}}
{{Infobox/video
| name = Direct Message to Hasbro: MLPG5 Is Cancelled.
| ytid = ay-NMiYIdGI
| stardate = 27 [[July 2021]]
| subject = {{Television|text}}, {{Reality|text}}
| style = {{Rage|text}}, {{Crazy|text}}
| saga = {{GOPony|text}} {{Dimensional Merge|text}}
| other =
| previous = [[Fiona Facetime Videos]]
| next = [[Regency_Inn_Richmond#Spectators_and_arrest|Regency Inn Sighting]]
}}

==Description==
{{quotebox|Cancel MLPG5 NOW, Hasbro, or things are seriously going to get [[Affair with Mother|Metaphysical]].}}

==Transcript==
[''Chris inhales''] Hello, people of Hasbro in Rhode Island. This is Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu – '''your Goddess Blue Heart''' – in [[Ruckersville, Virginia]].

Now, ''listen here'', and listen good. ''I have told you all. I've kept it going'' '''time and time again''', but you y'all keep ''putting it on'' and ''putting it on''.

But... ''My Little Pony: Generation '''FIVE'''''. Is. ''Cancelled!'' G4, ''Friendship is Magic'', ''needs – its – five – more – seasons''! It needs to go onto ''Season'' 14!

Now... [''[[Obesity|Chris appears to be winded after half a minute of ranting]]''] This is, the last, straw! Because for the GOOD, and SAFETY, of ''this timeline!'' You need to get get that shit PULLED OFF of shelves and amazon stores and wherever else, all. The dang. Far. Way.

AND CANCEL THE FRIGGIN' G5 SERIES! MAKE SURE IT ''NEVER'' GETS PUBLISHED ANYWHERE AND '''NEVER, EVER''' TALK ABOUT IT AGAIN, And make the offical cancellation notice '''PUBLIC!''' Tell everybody!

I am telling you this [[Chris and English|to warning you]]:

IF-YOU-CONTINUE-ON-AND-YOU-DO-NOT-LISTEN-TO-ME ''HASBROOOOOOOOOOOOOO''!

And do not resume G5...

[''Chris places his hand on his forehead, realizing he failed as a goddess'']

I m-mean you do...

You do not resume G4, you have to cancel ''G5''! If you don't cancel G5, [[Incest fallout chat leaks|you're going to put this '''ENTIRE''' TIMELINE in chaos!]] So, I'm giving you this, warning to tell you true, and ''STRAIGHT UP''!

[''Chris points intently at the camera'']

CANCEL GENERATION 5 NOW, HASBRO! '''NOW!'''

[''Chris pauses for a moment before ending the video, leaving us with a haunting image of the last image he would upload for years'']

==See also==
*[[My Little Pony Protests]]
*[[Chris and anger]]
*[[Iron Curtain]]
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Fiona Facetime Videos]]|nextlink=[[Regency_Inn_Richmond#Spectators_and_arrest|Regency Inn Sighting]]}}

==References==

<references/>

{{GOPonySaga}}
{{EverfreeSaga}}
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, 2021]]

Template:ListOfVideos/2021

2026-05-29T20:54:56Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

==February 2021==
*'''[[Fan visits#Aggravating Art|CHRIS CHAN DRIP OUT]]''' ''20 [[February 2021]]'' (0:04) {{Comedy}} {{Other}} [[Spirit possession|"Sonichu"]] is briefly recorded by a fan visiting [[14 Branchland Court|his house]] while wearing shoes.
*'''[[Chris Kisses Rosechu]]''' ''23 [[February 2021]]'' (0:53) {{Reality}} {{Crazy}} {{Praetor}} {{theclassic2.0}} {{Leaked}} [[Spirit possession|"Sonichu"]] is recorded kissing an imaginary [[Rosechu]] in the Goochland Public Library by an unknown cameraman. The video was leaked on to the [[Kiwi Farms]] in [[August 2021]].

==May 2021==
*'''[[Cover song: “I’ll Be Your Mirror” by Velvet Underground]]''' ''27 [[May 2021]]'' (2:12) {{Crazy}} {{Music}} {{ManchildMeldownShirt}} Chris sings the song "I'll Be Your Mirror" by The Velvet Underground.

==June 2021==
*'''[[Birthday Greetings to Devin]]''' ''19 [[June 2021]]'' (1:54) {{Comedy}} {{Reason}} {{Crazy}} {{Dimensional Merge}} {{ManchildMeldownShirt}} Chris sends a birthday shout-out to "Devin".
*'''[[Sylvia’s being comfy and a little bobble-headed]]''' ''20 [[June 2021]]'' (0:30) {{Reason}} Chris baby-talks and plays with his cat [[Liza, Patches and Sylvia|Sylvia]].
*'''[[Chris talking about the Binding of Isaac]]''' ''20 [[June 2021]]'' (0:17) {{Comedy}} {{Video games}} {{Bubblegumnightmare}} Chris briefly talks about a The Binding of Isaac game.

==July 2021==
*'''[[Help send Chris-Chan to Everfree NW]]''' ''9 [[July 2021]]'' (4:57) {{Reason}} {{Convention}} {{(Handouts)}} {{Business}} Chris promotes a GoFundMe campaign set up by [[Null]] so he can afford the trip to [[Everfree Northwest]], a ''[[My Little Pony]]'' convention in Seattle Washington.
*'''[[Paid Shout Out to Lifeguard Hermit]]''' ''9 [[July 2021]]'' (0:56) {{Reason}} {{Convention}} {{Business}} {{ManchildMeldownShirt}} Chris fulfills a shout-out and piece of artwork for an individual named Lifeguard Hermit who donated to the GoFundMe fundraiser.
*'''[[Chris Chan's shoutout to JoSona6]]''' ''14 [[July 2021]]'' (0:28) {{Reason}} {{Convention}} {{Business}} {{ManchildMeldownShirt}} Chris fulfills another shout-out video for the trip to [[Everfree Northwest]] campaign.

*'''[[Fiona Facetime Videos]]''' ''unknown'' (0:35) {{Comedy}} {{Leaked}} Recordings from Chris's Facetime sessions with Fiona.

*'''[[Direct Message to Hasbro: MLPG5 Is Cancelled.]]''' ''27 [[July 2021]]'' (1:32) {{Rage}} {{Crazy}} {{Television}} {{Reality}} {{GOPony}} {{Dimensional Merge}} Chris angrily demands that Hasbro cancels its fifth generation of ''[[My Little Pony]]''. [[Iron Curtain|Multiple punched-in holes in the hallway wall]] can be seen in the background throughout the video. [[Jail Saga|This was the last video Chris himself uploaded for over two years.]]

==August 2021==
*'''[[Regency_Inn_Richmond#Spectators_and_arrest|Regency Inn Sighting]]''' ''1 [[August 2021]]'' (0:26) {{Incest}} Chris was briefly filmed walking on the second floor of the Regency Inn leaving his hotel room.

*'''[[Incest Arrest|The Arrest]]''' ''1 [[August 2021]]'' {{Tragedy}} {{Comedy}} {{Reason}} {{Crazy}} {{Sex}} {{Homos}} {{Music}} {{Dimensional Merge}} {{Incest}} {{Prison}} Several onlookers recorded Chris getting arrested. In addition, police bodycam footage was released of the event.

Template:ListOfVideos/2020

2026-05-29T20:54:51Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

==February 2020==
*'''[[Live Reading of SNT Vs Sonichu, Part 2]]''' ''11 [[February 2020]]'' (2:53:42) {{Comedy}} {{Rage}} {{Crazy}} {{Other}} {{SNT}} {{Financhu Crisis}} {{Live}} Chris does a live reading of the 7th through final chapter of the fan-fiction ''Sonichu Vs SNT''.

*'''[[Xleepy#Welcome_to_Xleepy_-_Feat._Chris_Chan_.28Teaser.29|Welcome to Xleepy - Feat. Chris Chan (Teaser)]]''' ''29 [[February 2020]]'' (1:38) {{Crazy}} {{ManchildMeldownShirt}} Chris demonstrates his [[psychic powers]] as part of Xleepy's channel introduction video.

==March 2020==
*'''[[Sonic Rebuilt]]''' ''6 [[March 2020]]'' (1:00:39) {{Comics}} {{Television}} Chris contributes to the Sonic Rebuilt collaboration by recreating the scene where Sonic rescues Tails and Old Man Owl.

==April 2020==
*'''[[Analysis_Anarchy_Reaction_Livestreams#Reaction_Video:_Red_Vs_Blue_Part_1|Reaction Video: Red Vs Blue Part 1]]''' ''10 [[April 2020]]'' (23:52) {{Crazy}} {{ManchildMeldownShirt}} {{Live}} Chris reacts to the first part of ''Red vs Blue'' by the [[TF2 Analysts]].

*'''[[Chris Chan & Max Mandu LIVE / Leftovers Tonight]]''' ''19 [[April 2020]]'' (1:39:16) {{Crazy}} {{Comics}} {{Other}} {{Live}} Chris has a live interview with the Virginia-based YouTube channel leftovermedia along with local musician Max Mandu.

==May 2020==
*'''[[Analysis_Anarchy_Reaction_Livestreams#TF2_Analysis_Anarchy_Red_Vs_Blue_Part_2_Reaction_Video|TF2 Analysis Anarchy Red Vs Blue Part 2 Reaction Video]]''' ''15 [[May 2020]]'' (18:18) {{Crazy}} {{ManchildMeldownShirt}} {{Live}} <s>Chris</s> "Sonichu" reacts to the second part of ''Red vs Blue'' by the [[TF2 Analysts]].

==June 2020==
*'''[[Analysis_Anarchy_Reaction_Livestreams#Watching_TF2_Analysis_Anarchy_Red_Vs_Blue_Part_3|Watching TF2 Analysis Anarchy Red Vs Blue Part 3]]''' ''12 [[June 2020]]'' (38:37) {{Crazy}} {{Live}} "Sonichu" reacts to the third part of ''Red vs Blue'' by the [[TF2 Analysts]], featuring Barb.

==August 2020==
*'''[[Chris's Last Will and Testament|IMG 0176]]''' ''08 [[August 2020]]'' (04:35) {{Other}} {{Reality}} {{Tragedy}} {{Crazy}} {{Leaked}} {{Bubblegumnightmare}} A video will presented by [[Spirit possession|"Sonichu"]], as he prepares to send his belongings to two enablers/trolls.

==September 2020==
*'''[[Bonus short update from Barb 09/04/2020]]''' ''4 [[September 2020]]'' (0:43) {{Rumors}} {{Other}} Chris records a proof-of-life video of Barb in order to avoid getting pestered about her current state from weens in the upcoming stream.

*'''[[Red_vs_Blue_Reaction_Livestreams#Watching_TF2_Analysis_Anarchy_Red_Vs_Blue_Part_4.2C_plus_a_few_thoughts.|Watching TF2 Analysis Anarchy Red Vs Blue Part 4, plus a few thoughts.]]''' ''4 [[September 2020]]'' (49:10) {{Reason}} {{Crazy}} {{Rage}} {{Live}} "Sonichu" reacts to the fourth part of ''Red vs Blue'' by the [[TF2 Analysts]], and shares a few other thoughts with the stream.

*'''[[To Cole Smithey, from Barb, and Sonichu (Prime)]]''' ''30 [[September 2020]]'' (3:03) {{Reason}} {{Crazy}} {{Other}} Chris and Barb make a joint address to [[Cole Smithey]].

==October 2020==

*'''[[Red_vs_Blue_Reaction_Livestreams#Analysis Anarchy Red Vs Blue Part 5 Reaction+|Analysis Anarchy Red Vs Blue Part 5 Reaction+]]''' ''2 [[October 2020]]'' (57:15) {{Crazy}} {{Live}} [[Spirit possession|"Sonichu"]] reacts to the fifth part of ''Red vs Blue'' by the [[TF2 Analysts]].

*'''[[Goochland Library Sermon]]''' ''16 [[October 2020]]'' (15:19) {{Reason}} {{Crazy}} {{Dimensional Merge}} {{Praetor}} {{Jacob}} {{Idea Guy}} {{ManchildMeldownShirt}} [[Spirit possession|"Sonichu"]] delivers a sermon on the [[Dimensional Merge]] to the [[Praetor]] team.

*'''[[The Create Unknown#Interview|Christine Weston Chandler and Sonichu Exclusive Interview]]''' ''28 [[October 2020]]'' (1:08:31) [[Spirit possession|"Sonichu"]] is interviewed by Kevin Lieber and Matthew Tabor.

*'''[[Red_vs_Blue_Reaction_Livestreams#Sonichu_Reaction_TF2_Analysis_Anarchy_Red_Vs_Blue_Part_6|Sonichu Reaction TF2 Analysis Anarchy Red Vs Blue Part 6]]''' ''30 [[October 2020]]'' (1:06:57) {{Crazy}} {{ManchildMeldownShirt}} {{Live}} [[Spirit possession|"Sonichu"]] reacts to the sixth and final part of ''Red vs Blue'' by the [[TF2 Analysts]].

==November 2020==

*'''[[Chris Chan Sonichu Intro animation]]''' ''13 [[November 2020]]'' (0:24) {{Music}} {{Praetor}} {{Leaked}} An animated intro video showing Chris transforming into [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]], set to Chris's shoddy rendition of {{w|Twist of Fate (Olivia Newton-John song)|Twist of Fate}}.

*'''[[Sonichu reads and critiques a Fanfic by The Crimson Libertarian|Sonichu reads and critiques a Fanfic by The Crimson Libertarian]]''' ''18 [[November 2020]]'' (25:36) {{Rage}} {{Reason}} {{Crazy}} {{Fanart}} {{Reality}} [[Spirit possession|"Sonichu"]] reads and critiques a fanfiction sent to him through [[Twitter]].

==December 2020==

*'''[[The Create Unknown#Uncut Interview|Create Unknown Chris Chan UNCUT]]''' ''16 [[December 2020]]'' (1:20:12) The uncut interview with Kevin Lieber and Matthew Tabor.

Sonichu reads and critiques a Fanfic by The Crimson Libertarian

2026-05-29T05:15:37Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

{{SonichuPossession}}

'''Sonichu reads and critiques a Fanfic by The Crimson Libertarian''' is a video uploaded by Chris on 18 [[November 2020]]. In it, Chris reads and criticizes a fanfiction about himself [[Spirit possession|while pretending to be]] [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]]. Chris especially lashes out at the fanfic's references to his [[obesity]], his [[autism]], and his [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS]]. The Crimson Libertarian either deleted or privated their Twitter account not long after Chris posted this video.

The Crimson Libertarian can be viewed as a very minor yet successful [[Trolls|troll]] due to how upset Chris got while reading their fanfiction without active antagonization on their part.

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = Sonichu reads and critiques a Fanfic by The Crimson Libertarian
| ytid = kE0wXoyNYlE
| stardate = 18 [[November 2020]]
| subject = {{Fanart|Fanfiction}}, {{Reality|text}}
| style = {{Rage|text}}, {{Reason|text}}, {{Crazy|text}}
| shirt = A Sonichu and Rosechu's Valentine
| saga =
| other =
| previous = [[Sonic World]]
| next = [[The Create Unknown#Uncut Interview|Create Unknown Chris Chan UNCUT]]
}}

==Transcript==
'''Chris''': Hey everybody, Sonichu here, still in... Mama Chris-Chan's body for over seven months now, and, in this particular recording, I'm gonna be taking look at a... rough draft of a fanfic... or, possib–or, possibly a retelling of... a past event. Anyway, it's... based on Mama's real life event, you know, finding [[Bionic|Bionic the Hedgehog]] back in high school days, and so forth, but anyway. I felt like this thing needed personal critiquing... and I can–I been–I just felt like I couldn't do it over...multiple number of tw–tweets or commen–comments. Anyway I found it on [[Twitter]], anyway, so... this is from... The Crimson... Libertarian, @hm... @hmarine59, that's on Twitter.

So... [''Chris sighs and adjusts his camera''] Huh, so this is kinda like an opening draft of his–of his fanfic called "My Friend Sonichu; Based on the Life and Works of..."

She doesn't go by Christian anymore, she goes by [[Transgender|Christine]], alright, Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu is her full name. Y'might wanna fix that: "Christine Weston Chandler ''Sonichu''." Alright?

So anyway, [''sigh''] so this guy opens up with- uh... obviously it's past- it's past-tense right now, 'cause it opens up with- uh, a black screen with white text, "Manchester Highschool, November 13th, 1996, Thursday"-

Did you look at a calendar for this? I hope you looked at a calendar for this, you better double-check... November 13th, 1996... [''rotates smartphone''] Anyway, I'm just gonna rotate this horizontal and zoom in so I can... read this a little better. Umm- hmm, top of this page reads "Dodge"... why am I dodging?

"Uh, fade in- uhh, internal Manchester High gymnasium, afternoon. The Manchester High School basketball team practiced in the gymnasium for... the up-and-coming Friday night game."

Did you look at the schedule for that year? Around that weekend?

"They perform all sorts and maneuvers to ensure their victory against the away team of the rival local schools."

[''dog barks in the background''] Oh hey, between "Nov and the," you've got [''holds up two fingers''] '''two spaces'''. Nice job over using those space there. [''dog barks in the background'']

"All of this is set to the sounds of squeaking sneakers, the shouting of plays and cheers of encouragement from the student spectators. Transition shot over to the bleachers and stop on the guy in one of the sideline benches."

The 'guy'? Heh, I guess past-tense... [''snorts''] Excuse me. [''lets out a breath of air'']

"Sitting on the bench wearing a sweatshirt displaying the Manchester High School Lancers team emblem is the... [[Obesity|somewhat overweight]]- even at that age waterboy... Chris."

Yeah, known as Christian back then, but... he was- she was NOT overweight at all, she was '''actually''' of slender... slim body type- she was not overweight, she not fat, remove that word- 'is the... ''slender''- even at that age- waterboy Chris.' Alright? So there's your first edit right there... Well, second, counting the DOUBLE SPACE between the 'oven and the' which I pointed out just a moment ago. [''laughs'']

"He sits there lookin' absolutely checked out... and looking off to the side at what was just a blank wall... Daydreaming of his video game characters- his favorite video game characters-"

Mmm, I would say for the cons for the insigute- institution of this- um, she was actually reading a Fear Street novel from R.L. Stein- that's what she was doing at the time... Although I mean, yeah, you're basing it off of the- uh, event that happened in the book. I mean- but I mean, obviously, when she was reading that Fear Street book... sh- lookin' in the lockers and that's how she found [[Bionic the Hedgehog|Bionic]] but- and you're just mesh- you're just meshing here for this fanfic. Anyway,

"The camera starts to spin around him as the gymnasium reverts to a retro 16-bit landscape."

[''shakes head''] I wouldn't say it turns to retro [[Speech impediment|sisteen-bit]], especially for the context of this... it would turn into like a more realistic viewpoint of the area of which it was located on- it's like, you know, the actual grass of the upcoming thing which... I'll read about in just a moment, so I mean, it- it dosn- it doesn't look sisteen-bit-gamey, it's... y'know, like you'd see in an animation, a cartoon. Or like, you know, [[Sonic the Hedgehog (film)|CG-brought-to-life type of thing]]. Anyway, mm,

"Chris stands up from [[A-Log|a log]] that he was sitting on and walks through the brush where he eventually comes to a clearing. He gazes across the clearing, and there he sees the classic Green Hills Zone level."

-Green Hill Zone '''area''', y'know, it's the area, it's not just a level. It's part of the whole entire area. [''snorts'']

-"Classic Green Hill Zone level in the original Sonic the Hedgehog game-" parentheses, "(''yes'', really)"-

REALLY? REALLY! YES! Really. '''REALLY''' really, YEAH, REALLY! [''holds hands out and cocks head, looking utterly deranged'']

Uhh, "Chris fangasing- fang-gasm-ing th- f- fan- gasming..." that's a word... FanGASMing... fangasming. "'OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD IT'S- as beautiful as it was ON THE TV! [''laughs''] Look at this!' Chris stared, mouth agape, but was suddenly distracted by something moving from left to right. Close up shot of the [[Sonic the Hedgehog|Sega mascot]] moving around at the speed of sound..."

I wonder who this could be, yeah,

"Sonic books it across the landscape, leaving a trail of sisteen-bit dust in his stride."

Not sisteen-bit dust, '''actual''' dust, like, you know, literal dust- like you would see [''adjusts camera''] in real life 'cause he's actually dirt- kickin' up dirt, dust and dirt. [''stares into camera''] Hello? Okay... here is a definite grammar error. "He us through hoops"... [''cocks head''] Us? Should be '''goes'''.

"He '''goes''' through hoops, gathers rings, and defeats some badniks along the way; releasing their animal controllers." Alright. "Ecstatic, Chris goes 'GO SONIC, GO!' [''Chris pumps his hand in the air''] Sonic continues throughout the level, and appears to get closer and closer to where Chris was watching from. Chris waving both his arms in the air like he just didn't care, gets more and more excited to finally meet his childhood hero. Everything comes to a... head, when suddenly, in slow-motion... [''Chris speaks in slow-motion''] 'heeeyyy Soooniiic,' Chris says, and then Sonic replied, 'Chriiis, waaatch ouuut!' Chris says, 'whaaat?' Quick pan over to- shot to [[Joseph Herring]] [''unintelligible, most likely a garbled restatement of "Joseph Herring," or "who's saying"'']] 'Chris, watch out'- glances over the court, gets hit in the face [''palms face for emphasis''] with a basketball, which knocks him face-first into the ground. [''weird sound''] The team goes all- goes over to see if he's okay, and Chris begins to... spastically... begins to [[CLog 10042017 - Q&A NO MORE|spastically cry like an autistic baby]]- the autistic baby..."

[[''glares and shakes head''] DON'T INSULT MAMA LIKE THAT, DON'T INSULT HER LIKE THAT! [''sigh''] You could say, "Chris begins to spastically cry." [''shakes hand in disapproval''] Just leave out the "like the autistic baby he is." [''looks into the camera''] I'm lookin' at you.

"He shifts from crying to a slight whimper as he sits on the sideline bench with an ice pack on his swollen forehead. The coach of the team kneels next to Chris- tries to comfort him- coach says, 'are you gonna be alright, Chris?'"

Hang on, I gotta switch to the next tweet that has the next page of this thing. [''Chris messes with his phone''] Alright,

"Chris says- is barely- is barely audible, 'yeah.' The coach says, 'Alright, that's good to know.' Coach stands up, does an arm back stretch, and gives an audible sigh of relief. [''sigh''] 'Well, practice is over for the day, so you can go ahead and get changed and go home.' aaand Chris nods, stands, and goes t- stands to go to the boy's locker room."

Umm, just a side- just to clarify, Mama didn't wear- didn't it- technically... change clothes. She pretty much wore what she wore throughout the day as normal- I mean, it's not like she had a basketball outfit to change into- neither did she change into her gym shirt and shorts- her gym clothes, okay? That- not during the basketball practice, 'cause, you know- mm, just doing her job as water... as manager, okay? Her job as manager. Anyway, so in this instance,

"Chris nods and stands up to go to the boy's locker room, where a couple members of the team left without saying a word to Chris." Alright then, "Internal Manchester High School boy's locker room day. Locker door transition. Chris stands there lookin' at his forehead, [''Chris touches his forehead''] bumping the locker door mirror as the air conditioner rattled off in the background."

'Ra''dd''led', you used d's instead of t's; it should be 'ra''tt''led', not raddled. RATTLE. '''T'''. R-a-t-t-l-e-d.

"He pokes at it and gives an occasional sound of pain from the test [?] swelling."

[''explaining''] He pokes at his forehead [''Chris pokes at his forehead''] to that. [''sigh'']

"Giving-"

You could just say, "giving a ''sigh''" Not "giving an autistic sigh". "''Giving a sigh!''" You don't need the au- you don't need the a- you don't need the autistic adjective. "Giving a sigh."

"Giving a sigh, he shuts the locker door. Suddenly out of the blue, standing behind the locker door, a three-foot-three bright orange anthropomorphic hedgehog... [''long pause''] Suddenly out of the blue, standing... behind the locker..."

I hate "the hedgehog". What? Just... What? You need the word 'appears' at the end; "The bright orange anthropomorphic hedgehog ''appears''", obviously revealed to be Bionic because my tagline, Bionic.

"'Hello.' Chris is then startled and lets out an... [[12 October 2009|autistic screech]]."

'Lets out, ''a'' screech.' A '''screech'''. Remove the 'autistic'. "...Lets out a screech of fear."

"In the process of screaming and... [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|defecating]] on his-"

[tapping phone screen] YOU DO NOT NEED THAT LAST PART!

"In the process of screaming, Chris hits his head on a locker door by accident and falls to the locker room floor."

[''Chris leans forward''] I'm lookin' at you again. "defecating on yourself" [''shaking fist''] '''[[Chris and anger|I'M GONNA PUNCH YOU IN THE FACE FOR THAT!]]'''

[''Looks at phone again.''] “He rolls from side-to-side in the pain, but quickly returns his attention to the orange-colored figure. Chris, in pain and shock, ‘Who- who, uh, wha- what are you?’”

Okay, and this is where I’m definitely gonna give you some more commentary on. Alright so, in this instance, uh, Bionic would introduce himself- I mean, I’m gonna just pretty much play amnesia for the purposes of, play the- Bionic has amnesia, for the purposes of this fanfic. Buuut, in this case, it would’ve been like Bionic’s… tr– came in from the other dimension where he was in, after he had been… had dreamed he had become long lost from Sonic. Alright?

And had gone into the basketball dimension where he– and... and every – and all that, just as Mama said when she wrote that story about Bionic.

I mean, I real- I, even upon retrospect, I can see upon the realization that, that, that, that could use some improvement; but eh, what you gonna do? At least Bionic does have an interest in mechanical engineering and basketball. Does very well in basketball.

So, in this case, it’d be like, ya know, just for the fic purposes. This fanfic is like, let’s just say: Bionic’s suddenly had amnesia from tran- from suddenly coming from the dimension he was in... th-... alternate dimension he was in earlier with the alien-type creatures and basketball and mechanical opportunities and all that, so. Let’s go from there, so.

Um. [''Starts reading fic again as Bionic.''] "'Me? Well, I’m a hedgehog and on the matters of WHO I am. Um, that I have no idea. I just popped into existence and now I’m talking to you, in this smelly, sweaty room that’s covered in tall, metal doors, for some reason. What is this place, by the way?'"

And, uh, alright. So, on this note that- I mean, sure, you can say that, um, that – that Chris ended up, uh, having to just spell it out for Bionic at this point, buuuttt – in reality, it’s just, you know, it would’ve been an instant mind-link, just… on the – instant. Um, Mama would’ve literally just… within, within milliseconds read Bionic’s mind and gotten the general idea of everything. He – nnj, and pulled the remaining answers, literally, from the cosmos and everything, of all that instance[?].

So. In this instance, you’re just– you’re just like… what, not really just… doing that and just… you’re saying she’s, you’re saying she’s pulling it out of thin air, but nope! She’s accessing the cosmos AND Bionic’s subconscious memories. Alright? That’s what we’re doin’- that’s what’s going on here. Alright, so. Alright.

[''Looks back at phone to read fic as Chris.''] "'This is a lock—uh, wait a minute, what do you mean popped into existence? What does that even mean?'"

I mean, sure, you can also play out that, uh, Mama was not yet learning about her abilities, at that time, so. Yeah. There’s all that. Anyway, umm .. f – [''Chris mumbles to himself.''] Awh, I lost my place. Alright, here we go.

[''Starts reading again as Bionic.''] "'Well, I feel it’s self-explanatory. I wasn’t here one moment and the next, I was! Anything other than my current memories? Uhh, pfft – nng, shh.. [''Rubs head, acting out Bionic’s mannerisms.''] Yup! I’m afraid I can’t say anything for sure."'- Eh- "Chris looked at the – looked at the small figure with a sense of awe and began to have an inner monologue."

Actually yeah, that definitely goes with what I said, just a short moment ago. Having the inner monologue and all that. Just… reading the situation.

[''Starts reading again.''] "Not knowing that everything he’s saying was being spoken out loud and right in front of this creature’s overly cartoonish, rodent-like faccceeee… " [''Begins to make strange faces at the camera.'']
"Then Chris says: 'Huh. Well, this is weird. Never in my whole life have I ever experienced something so bizarre. This guy – this hedgehog, looks just like Sonic, but he’s all orange instead of blue. Could this have something to do with me getting hit in the head with that… basketball?' Then Bionic says: 'Um, what’s a Sonic?' 'What?' 'You just said that I look like Sonic. Who or what is that?'"

And like I said, from this point on, that this point; quoted from the cosmos and from s – and from my s-memory, yeah. So, she – so, she knew that, that the two of them were brothers.

[''starts reading again''] "'Alright, well, um. He’s your brother! Sonic the Hedgehog is your brother.'... 'Um, okay? That makes sense, I guess. Umm, I guess I’ll just take your word for it until I can confirm this or whatever.' [''Chris groans.''] 'So, whooo am I?' 'Wait, what?' 'Um, I was just wondering since you know who my brother was, that you know who I am.'"

Again, pulling from my subconscious memories and the cosmos with her abilities,

'Oh right, your name.' sss- someth- somehow strange that I know this, ''your name that I somehow happen to know''. The name you were born with, your birth name, your name by birth'"-

I mean, what's up with all... belaboring- deh- what's up with all this belaboring [''pfft''] thinkin' [''breaking character as Sonichu''] ''I'' was making this- thinking ''she'' was making this up? No, [''waves finger''] she was not making this up! Hhhe's like,

"'Wha? Biiionic.' 'Bionic? Bionic the hedgehog?' 'Yes.' 'What, am I like a cyborg-robot-thing?' 'No.' 'Then why Bionic?' 'Because you're Sonic's brother' 'Aaand? What else is there?' 'You're also a basketball player.'"

Also the fact that she just LITERALLY READ YOUR MIIIIND! '''Literally read Bionic's miiind at the time. So yeah, oh. Okay,

"'You're basketball- you're Sonic's brother and you're a basketball player. Your name is Bionic; you were born with that.' 'Wait. Oh. What?' 'BASKETBALL! You know, b-ball, [''Chris makes a dribbling gesture''] hoops [''pretends to shoot a hoop''] and other similar sounding words like that?' 'Am I any good at it?'

Eh. Wait a minute. Sarcastically? [''points at his phone screen''] shhh- [''shakes head''] No. Would not be said sarcastically.

"'Oh, among which he has the best. Your stil- your skills are on-par with legends like Michael Jordan, Shaq, and... that's about all the basketball people I know at this point, actually.' 'I dunno, am I really that good?' 'Well, why don't we test it out for ourselves? C'MON, dude, let's go hit the gym.'" Alright. "Internal Manchester High School gymnasium, afternoon: Chris escorted Bionic to the gymnasium and hoped... to God he's actually good at basketball... so I won't be caught out on his bullshit." [''Chris gives an eerie hundred-yard-stare into the camera, then points to his phone'']

I feel like that oughta be, "Chris escorted Bionic to the gymnasium and hoped to God that he's actually good at basketball and [''taps head''] '''is right'''." I'm finding that out. You're not calling out bullshit. There's no bullshit to be called out! It's a '''fact'''. Alright? So that was a '''stupid statement''' to make.

"But in a series of three-pointers, making shot after shot after shot, it turned out the little orange..."

NOT A BASTARD! YOU'RE NOT A BASTARD! Don't say bastard!

"It turned out the little orange ''hedgehog'' knows how to shoot."

Alright? [''shaking finger''] Let's take these ads[?] seriously; I'm giving them to you. Alright,

"Almost like when Chris introduced the suggestion to Bionic, it became reality."

Because it was reality beforehand. DUUUH.

"Chris, with a look of ecstatic on his face, cheered on as Bionic went above and beyond what Chris ever expected. And then cut to a set of gymnasium doors revealing Joseph Herring."

Eeeh, and one more page I gotta go down here. Alright, now on this note, it's like you're- you- you could call this a viewing from... [[Dimensions#1218|1218]] into [[Dimensions#C-197|C-197]]. You could- you could say it like that for this instance, alright? Aaand, it's like, you know, [''taps head''] mama Chris at this time was one of the very few who could see- who could initially see that. Obviously with Joseph Herring here, so. Yeah. Mm, it's not like he doesn't say, "hey Chandler," He says, "Hey Chris."

"'Hey Chris, what're you doing? Practice is over. Why are you still here?' And Chris turns to face Joseph, 'Hey Joe, you need to see this, this is ama-' Chris is about to find out that Bionic has di- disappeared with only a basketball laying on the laminated floor."

Yeah, but in this instance, Bionic clearly interacted- he had just interacted with the basketball. So... Yeah, at this point... he was like, partially visible to everybody- to Christi- to mama Chris and to everybody around her, so, in that one instance, Joe would have literally seen him. Alright, for a split-second, but then- but at that point- since Bionic was still learning about himself at the time... Yeah, he would have the instance- instinct of running away from Joes- from Joseph in the situation. So, yeah, that's the reason, alright? So, anyway, my basketball laying on the laminated floor, alright,

"In a confused whisper, 'Um- um, Bionic?' 'Um, okay- well come on, your mom's waiting for you outside in the car. Seeya tomorrow, Chris.' 'Yeah. Uh, see you tomorrow.' And Chris walks out of the gymnasium shutting off the lights on his way out through the set of doors."

Mmm, didn't need to shut off the lights because- duddn't know where the light switch is- didn't know where the light switch was. Wasn- a custodian takes care of that.

"The short- the door shuts as the afternoon sun casts a shadow on the lone basketball from the gymnasium's window. Awkward silence, fade out."

Alright, so anyway, so that's my two bolts. You could do better on this, Crimson Libertarian. You could do better on this- take everything I said and apply it to your writing, alright? Anyway, thank you for sharing this, and- uh, have a good day. Be safe. Thank you.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Chris Chan Sonichu Intro animation]]|nextlink=[[The Create Unknown#Uncut Interview|Create Unknown Chris Chan UNCUT]]}}

[[Category: Chris-chan videos, 2020]]
[[Category: Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Group Embargo on GameStop, Best Buy, and Simon Shopping Centers

2026-05-29T04:39:08Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

'''Group Embargo on GameStop, Best Buy, and Simon Shopping Centers''' is the third and final video uploaded to Chris's [[YouTube]] channel on 29 [[November 2015]]. While it did not include a description, Chris shortly provided a link to it on his [[Facebook]] page with the notice:

{{quotebox|Until I am no longer banned from All Four Charlottesville, VA GameStop stores, as well as the Best Buy store and ‪#‎FashionSquare‬ Shopping Center, I hereby am on an Embargo against ‪#‎GamsStop‬, ‪#‎BestBuy‬, and ‪#‎SIMON‬ Malls. And I Encourage ALL of my friends and fans to Stand With Me and not go to any GameStops, Best Buys and SIMON Malls Anywhere.

Thank you all for your support in resolving this problem for a better tomorrow!}}

In this video, even more of old Chris returns, but he seems to have tamed his [[Chris and anger|anger]] to some extent. Instead of jumping and shouting at the camera, he puts an emphasis on his claims in the typical [[Chris's mannerisms|way Chris does]]. He certainly feels [[Chris and his ego|a great deal of power]] in the situation, stating that if he is [[kick the autistic|hurt and bullied]], all autistic people and [[Tomgirl Saga|LBGT]] people are as well. He also encourages his "thousands to millions of fans worldwide" to follow him on his endeavors, even though the only videos he post that break over ten thousand views are the ones that are [[HelloLadyFans|batshit crazy]].

His victim complex is quite interesting in this one, as he believes the [[Yellow-Shirted Foe|employee he maced]] has family at [[Best Buy]] that are banning him for no reason, and tries to blame his sexuality, gender and autism for acting like a [[slow-in-the-mind]]. In true Chris fashion, he makes an insincere apology, then attacks the guy he maced. He also stressed that banning him would make it bad for everyone, and unbanning him would give them all good karma. He also believes wars could be prevented by [[My Little Pony]] and the [[Care Bears]].

== Video ==
{{Infobox/video
| name = Group Embargo on GameStop, Best Buy, and Simon Shopping Centers
| ytid = ZhM1rDTwvY8
| stardate = 29 [[November 2015]]
| saga = {{Sonic Boom|text}}
| subject = {{Video games|[[GameStop]]}}, {{Reality|text}}
| style = {{Rage|text}}, {{Reason|[[Chris and negotiation|Negotiation]]}}
| shirt = {{MightyLesbianShirt|text}}
| previous = [[Family and Couples Figures Available for collecting and purchase. Also Sandy and Zapina Rosechu.|Family and Couples Figures Available for collecting and purchase.]]
| next = [[Embargo Update 12/2/2015]]
}}

{{Quote|Every one of my thousands to millions of fans worldwide, I encourage you all to follow me in this embargo! Never con-, never go to or conduct any business at any GameStop location anywhere}}

==Transcription==
Hello to all my loyal fans over the [[Internet]]. This is Christine Chandler coming to you live once again from [[14 Branchland Court|my house]] here. And uh, because I have not received a response I have a letter that I had, had written on November 12th, 2015, which that was a Thursday. And I believe I sent it um, either that same day or the day after on Friday. But anyway, uh, I’m going to read this letter and if you, and it’s addressing definitely to the local [[GameStop|GameStops]] in [[Charlottesville]], [[Virginia]], all four of them, as well as [[Fashion Square Mall]] and, believe it or not, even the [[Best Buy]]. So without furder ado, I’m going to read this letter.

Yeah, and unfortunately I did not know his name, so he’s referred to as sir and what-, and similar pronouns. So anyway, I wrote, uh, “Dear [[Yellow-Shirted Foe|Yellow-Shirt Assistant Manager]] of the Fashion Square GameStop. I never got your name, I’m sorry. To preface this letter, I most humbly apologize for everything I have done as of the release date of the Sonic Boom video games, around November 11th, 2014, in regards to the [[Sonic Boom Protests|protest]] of [[SEGA]] changing [[Sonic the Hedgehog]]’s arm color to blue from tan. More recently I have learned that the next console Sonic the Hedgehog game, his arm cumber will be back to tan, and therefore I have concluded the protest against SEGA and made the official statement on my [[Facebook]] group page, [[FIX SONIC'S ARMS IMMEDIATELY, SEGA!!!]] To recap and make the story short, in the, in Sonic Boom, SEGA had changed Sonic’s arm color. I felt most upset about it. I protested by discouraging the purchase of said games and related Sonic Boom merchandise, and encouraging sending everything Sonic Boom back to SEGA. I had contacted SEGA of America. I received not good responses on the topic. I caused male, I caused malcontent against me and my peaceful protest.” I ended up [[banned]] from the four local above GameStops, and aside from handing the udder three locals, where I sent a carbon copy as well.

[''loses place''] Ah, da da da da da da da....Alright, um, “And upon the final major shock to my fear, paranoia, and nervous system at the Fashion Square location, I retaliated with a show of pepper spray container and left with a show of what was originally meant to be a warning to not ban me ever, scaring the [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|living crap out of me]], or just plain giving me a bad day. It turned out to be [[26 December 2014|a more worse day for everyone]]. And since then, the jail time kept me from getting very important and detailed packing done for moving back to my renovated house on the following December 31st, 2014. Also, I had emptied the thing of pepper spray, downward into a nearby hole—big hole—outside, and disposed of said canister into the hole. I did not have any pepper spray on me since, court dates were had and maintained, along with respective [[Chris and psychology#Past instances of professional help (or lack thereof)|mental therapy and analysis]] towards the fact that I had felt most overwhelmed, paranoid, and wanting to defend myself from such being banned and personal attacks to me. And upon the court’s conclusion, the whole mess has become over with, and all should be resolved, as I am praying to achieve today.

“Upon the recent conclusion of reversing the arm-color change among the udder details, while related, had little to do with the protest, including game glitches, story content, whatever, I understand and realize that the protest was not only a waste of time and energy, ultimately, but that it was among the worst mistakes I have ever done in my life, not counting what the Internet [[trolls|haters]] had blackmailed me into performing and video-recording since [[2007]]. And I most deeply and seriously regret having begun the useless protest in the first place, and I more regret ultimately feeling need to defend myself and spritzing pepper spray at you, the Yellow-Shirt Assistant Manager. [''looks at camera''] [[Chris and remorse|I am really, very sorry.]]

“And with all that, I most humbly request to be unbanned from all of the local GameStops in Charlottesville, Virginia. I will be most appreciative of not being forced to waste gas money to go out of town and most distance, as far as the one GameStop within the US military housing...of Fort Lee! Here in Virginia. Fort Lee! And, appreciating the soldiers who helped defend the United States after my father, [[Robert Franklin Chandler, Jr.]], having served around World War Two, stationed in Seoul, Korea, in the Signal Corps. I am serious. I did do that. I had required pre-owned Pikachu [[Amiibo]] figures for materials for my [[Sonichu]] figures that I make and sell on [[Etsy]], on my shop, Cwcville Shopping.

“But I digress. Not only will I be most appreciative, but I will bring good karma to you and all the other employees of your GameStop, and the other three GameStops as well. And we can all be forgiven and forget the whole mess in good strides of the future. [''hand flourish''] Everyone wins. But if I am left banned, then everyone loses, with the most heavy symbolic [[HippoOnYourHead|hippopotamus of guilt, shame, and loathing]] upon yourselves, because [''clenches fist''] not only are you most discriminating against one person, but a high-functioning [[autism|autistic]], [[Homos|lesbian]] [[Ctranswoman]], famous author, with headache-inducing mental handicaps, who would never intentionally or unintentionally [[death threats|harm]] any living thing without any reason whatsoever. Again, everyone loses if I am left banned from errywhere!

“And speaking of yellow-shirted friend, I believe you either have a secret family within or are moon-, moonlighting at the Best Buy in Charlottesville as well. To make this, to make that story short, a few days after I got out of jail on December 28th, 2014, and I had absolutely no pepper spray on my person whatsoever, because as I had mentioned earlier, I had emptied the canister and disposed of the can-, canister. [[Best Buy#Attempted shoplifting|I had done nothing at the Best Buy]] prior to that day. And a certain [[manajerk|manager]] spokes the living crap outta me, tellin’ me I was not welcome there, that I was banned from there. I had asked why. He did not give me any answer. Then I reached into my bag to get some money out, little funds to see if I could pay my way out of this. I had not said anything about the pepper spray whatsoever, but I put my hand in the bag, and his subordinate shouts, ‘He’s going for the pepper spray!’ I stopped in surprise after hearing that. Ultimately, I left the store. I had gone there again months later to be met with the same shpiel, and no answer to why. I even went over dere head, on the telephone, to try to resolve it. Nothing.

"Then last Tuesday, November 10th, I went there once again to buy [[LEGO]] Dimensions Pack with a ten-dollar certificate. I got met in the back of the store with the shpiel once again, and this time I asked why and I finally got the answer. They said that I, quote, threatened them with pepper spray, and we have video footage, unquote. But again, that first time they said anything about me not being welcome there, I had not, nor ever, threatened anyone at that store. Nor had I any pepper spray on any of my visits there, then, and prior.

“Therefore, I faff, I feel I have to pin the blame onto you, sir, for that, my yellow-shirted friend. Either of having family there, or giving me more of a difficult time--[''misreads''] and giving me more of a difficult time, then I was already going under. Or, you do have a second job between the GameStop and the Best Buy. Hmm! And I would expect, that might be something the Better Business Bureau might like to hear, perhaps? So once again, you can eff, give everyone good karma by forgiving me and forgetting the whole mess, and unbanning me from these four GameStops, as well as the one Best Buy, and thus allowing me to be welcomed back to Fashion Square Mall as well. Everyone wins. Good peace of mind. Or leave me banned from everywhere, and nobody wins with the hippopotamus weights upon each of our heads forever!

“And I reiterate, I am really very sorry for pepper-spraying you. I am really very sorry for making the protest against SEGA in the first place. I have no pepper spray, and I promise never to cause anyone harm or trouble ever again. All that needs to be done for full peaceful resolutions is to unban me from everywhere. And I have stated in this later. Please, do the positive thing, and bring good karma upon us all. I’m looking towards, I’m looking forward to a written, detailed response from you and everyone who gets this letter, documenting that I am no longer banned from the Charlottesville, Virginia GameStops, and Best Buy, and Fashion Square. Thank you and have a very good and safe day. Sincerely, Christine Weston Chandler.”

But, right now, it’s November 29th, more than two weeks since I mailed the letter to all f-, four said locations at the GameStops, and I have not heard anything. Therefore, I am making this video. I [''shakes fist''], Christine Weston Chandler, am quite upset by not receiving any response whatsoever. No-, as well as still being banned from not only the four GameStops, but the two other places as well, Best Buy here, and Fashion Square. And, I am it-, I am issuing an embargo on all GameStops, as well as GameStop.com. And every one of my [[True and Loyal Fanbase|thousands to millions of fans worldwide]], I encourage you all to follow me in this embargo! Never con-, never go to or conduct any business at any GameStop location anywhere. Do not even go to GameStop.com. US, UK, anywhere in the four websites. None of them. Do not go to any of those places. As well as, I am not, I am banning Best Buy as well. No Best Buy, no BestBuy.com, no Best Buy UK, whatever. As well as all Simon shopping malls! [''removes [[Dramatic glasses removal|glasses]] dramatically''] I’m very serious in this. Your lack of response has left me most upset! My yellow-shirted foe! [''pounds knee''] Mm! And you will lose business because of this! And if you do not have me unbanned from all four of the local GameStops, as well as the Best Buy, and Fashion Square...[''pounds knee again''] this multi-person ban from you all will still continue on. So you think about that. Bring back good karma to us all, or pretty much be damned. [''shouting now''] You’re discriminating against the LGBT community as well as the autism community! You decided to hate against us, when you hate against me. And we all know that love and friendship conquers hatred, and does a lot better. It could prevent a lot of wars, if we take to the l-, lessons learned from the positive friendship TV shows that are made available, including ''[[My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic]]'' and ''[[Care Bears|The Care Bears]]''.

So anyway, embargo on the GameStops, the Best Buy, and Simon shopping malls, begins right now! [''points at camera''] Game over, GameStop. [''deep voice''] Gaaaame over! [[Spanish|El juego se acabado!]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Family and Couples Figures Available for collecting and purchase. Also Sandy and Zapina Rosechu.]]|nextlink=[[Embargo Update 12/2/2015]]|}}

{{SonicBoomSaga}}
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, 2015]]
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

South Park

2026-05-28T03:59:57Z

FromtheWordsofBR: /* Other mentions */

[[File:ChrisChanSP.png|800px|center]]
{{Quote|Hey, [[Vivian]]. I'm going to tell you right now that if you were trying to offend me with this "South Park" Parody; You Failed. This is just SOO FUNNY! You ought to know I like "South Park", especially the [[Chris and stress|less dramatic]], [[Random-access humor|more comical]] episodes. ROFL|Chris<ref>[[List of Chris's comments on YouTube]]</ref>}}
[[Image:CADD_Chef.jpg|thumb|"Grade-F destruction"? Really?]]

'''''South Park''''' is a popular animated comedy program airing on Comedy Central since 1997. [[Chris]] was an avowed fan of the series, later dropping off and not keeping up with newer episodes "for a few years" according to Chris himself in [[Sachumo]]'s interview. His favorite episode is “Hellen Keller! The Musical”.

His collection of [[List of Chris's PSN video downloads|PlayStation Network video downloads]] and [[Netflix]] downloads include dozens of ''South Park'' episodes, and he's swiped both its content and style on more than one occasion in his comics.

==South Park in ''Sonichu''==

===Beel===

{{main|Beel}}

Beel is the receptionist at the [[4-cent_garbage.com]] building in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]]. His appearance seems to be somewhat based on the [[Wikipedia:List of supporting characters on South Park#Satan|Satan]] character on ''South Park'', with the exception of his lack of facial hair and cloven hooves as featured on Satan. The Satan character on the show is a [[homos|homo]], and was engaged in love affairs with [[Wikipedia:List of supporting characters on South Park#Saddam Hussein|Saddam Hussein]] and other male characters. In Sonichu 10, Beel uses the line "where I was going to go, Detroit?"<ref>''[[Sonichu 10|Sonichu #10]]'', [[:File:SchuComic10P32.jpg|p. 32]].</ref> As Chris himself has confirmed, this is a plagiarism from a [[Wikipedia:Do the Handicapped Go to Hell?|South Park episode]].<ref>[[Mailbag 35#In which Chris tells us that we need to go look up what he stole from]]</ref>

===CADD Chef===
{{main|CADD Chef}}
CADD Chef is a minor villain. One can easily tell that this character (although based on Kene Meniru, one of Chris's teachers at [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]]) is a blatant ripoff of [[Wikipedia:Isaac Hayes|Isaac Hayes]]'s "[[Wikipedia:Chef (South Park)|Chef]]" character from ''South Park'', not just in appearance but also in one of his quotes.

===[[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack]]===

The title of Chris's gallery of hideous Rule 34 is copied from the title of the [[video game]] ''[[Wikipedia:South Park: Chef's Luv Shack|South Park: Chef's Luv Shack]]''.

===[[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]]===

[[Wikipedia:Stan Marsh|Stan]], [[Ruckersville, VA|Kenny]], [[Christian Weston Chandler|Cartman]], Tolkien and [[Sweetheart|Wendy]] make cameo appearances in the "Dating Education" episode.<ref>[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcville//SchuComic10P7.jpg Sonichu 9]</ref>

==Chris fails to grasp ''South Park''==

After the release of Chris's audio recording of his [[April 2010]] [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|confrontation with Michael Snyder]], [[Vivian Gee]] used that audio to compose a parody video, setting the recording to a ''South Park''-style animation that featured Chris in the role of a bigoted Cartman-esque character.

Chris commented on the video's [[YouTube]] page, having fundamentally missed the point: "I'm going to tell you right now that if you were trying to offend me with this "South Park" Parody; You Failed. This is just SOO FUNNY!"

It appears that Chris doesn't understand the show's presentation of characters like Cartman. While Cartman (and to a lesser extent his friends, when they're in their more sociopathic modes) is meant to come across as a selfish little snot devoid of any redeeming qualities, Chris apparently views him as some kind of role model or example of appropriately entertaining behavior, hence his obvious pleasure at the comparison Vivian's video created. Further evidence of Chris having a positive view of Cartman appears in [[Mailbag_35#In_which_Chris_tells_us_that_we_need_to_go_look_up_what_he_stole_from|Mailbag 35]], where Chris seems to see Cartman as a good Christian looking to save the souls of rest of the children on the show<ref>[[Mailbag 35#In which Chris tells us that we need to go look up what he stole from]]</ref>, though in [[Update: 2/25/16|some cases]], perhaps not.

Chris rarely understands any moral dispensed by television. When he does take one, it's because he's decided that it can be used to justify whatever tomfoolery he's been up to. Unsurprisingly, Chris often misses the original point completely. For example, while attempting to justify his attempt to pretend to be Liquid in an attempt to steal his girlfriend, he claimed that he was "Wrong, but for the right reasons." This comes from another episode of South Park called "Best Friends Forever", where, after a satire of the Terri Schiavo controversy, it is stated that Cartman was "Right, but for the wrong reasons". In context, it meant that his goal of shutting down the vegetative Kenny's life support was the right thing to do (for reasons involving the fate of the universe that are too complex to explain here), but his motivation was completely off mark: he only did it because he knew that Kenny's death would cause him to inherit his PSP. Meanwhile, Stan and Kyle were "Wrong, but for the right reasons", as they wanted to keep Kenny alive in a perpetual vegetative state even though they should just let him die, but they were doing so because they actually cared about Kenny, rather than exploiting the situation for their own benefit like Cartman was. Chris seems to have interpreted this as "If you do a bunch of bad things, like pretending to be someone else in order to steal their girlfriend, you are completely justified in doing so if your dishonest actions lead to a positive outcome, like proving that you are the TRUE and HONEST Christian Weston Chandler and getting laid".

His fear of homosexuals destroying the future, incidentally, emerged from an episode of ''[[South Park]]'' called "[[Wikipedia:Goobacks|Goobacks]]", which was a satire on the controversy of illegal immigration. In the episode, a group of rednecks who had lost their jobs to the illegal immigrants from the future decided that the best way to get their jobs back was to destroy the future by making everyone gay so there wouldn't be anybody in the future. It should be noted that although Chris undoubtedly believes South Park is anti gay, the show itself actually preached tolerance towards homosexuals in the episode "Big Gay Al's Big Gay Boat Ride", which was only the fourth episode of the show's run and introduced the recurring character Big Gay Al, who has been portrayed positively in each of his appearances. In addition, the show openly supported gay marriage in the 2005 episode "Follow That Egg". Show creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone are members of the Libertarian Party, which is known for their support of gay marriage, and would probably be none too pleased with Chris's interpretation of the show's stance on homosexuality.

Chris believes that every fictional character in existence, including his own, inhabits some alternate plane of reality where they can interact with one another. This belief may have partially stemmed from the episode "Imaginationland", which depicted such a locale.

The episode "[[Wikipedia:Guitar Queer-O|Guitar Queer-O]]" parodied the ''[[Guitar Hero]]'' series by depicting the rise-and-fall narrative of many musician stories through the lens of the game, and had characters treating genuine guitar skill dismissively. At one point, a character is stated to be able to play the game "acoustically", shown by having him play an unplugged ''Guitar Hero'' controller and produce an indecipherable clicking of buttons. This episode could well have influenced Chris's [[Chris and music#Instruments|belief]] that playing ''Guitar Hero'' is just as impressive as the real thing, and [[CWC Music Video Holding Out For a Hero|a few videos]] show similar acoustic performances.

==Other mentions==
*Chris left [[IRC (16 October 2008)]] because "[[Wikipedia:Breast Cancer Show Ever|Breast Cancer Show Ever]]" was coming on. He used a quote said by Wendy from this episode ("I am going to shove your ass down your throat and make you eat your underwear!") in [[Take that Page DOWN NOW!|his threat to]] [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|ED]].
*Chris also used another Wendy quote from the same episode ("You fucking suck so hard!") as an insult towards [[Max]] during the [[Julie Reveals Herself: The Prequel|Julie Reveals]] [[Julie Reveals Herself|Herself calls]].
*During a chat, [[PandaHalo|Panda]] suggested to Chris to put a butt plug inside his ass in order to prevent himself from releasing flatulence. Chris declined, saying that "constriction of the gas-release can result in spontaneous combustion",<ref name=IRC27Dec2008 /> a belief he most likely picked from the episode [[Wikipedia:Spontaneous Combustion (South Park)|''Spontaneous Combustion'']].
*Chris bought [[Wikipedia:South Park: Chef's Luv Shack|''South Park: Chef's Luv Shack'']] and the "When Technology Attacks!" [[PSP|UMD]].<ref>[[List of Chris's games]]</ref>
*Chris liked the [[Wikipedia:Make Love, Not Warcraft|''World of Warcraft'']]<ref name=IRC27Dec2008>[[IRC (27 December 2008)]]</ref> and [[Wikipedia:Guitar Queer-O|''Guitar Hero'']]<ref>[[List of Chris's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica]]</ref> episodes.
*Chris imitated [[Wikipedia:List_of_other_South_Park_residents#Towelie|Towelie]] and criticized [[Wikipedia:Kenny McCormick|Kenny]] in [[CWCFlyingElephants]].
*Chris told [[Clyde]] and [[Surfshack Tito (troll)|Surfshack Tito]], "You both want me to even Beg, you can go point at your own damn snouts and Oink like Eric Cartman, and then Rape yourselves with your own Damn [[Star Wars|Darth Maul Dual LightSabre]]."<ref>[[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails]]</ref>; Cartman's oinking is in reference to "[[Wikipedia:Scott Tenorman Must Die|Scott Tenorman Must Die]]".
*''Scott Tenorman Must Die'' was also referenced by Chris while talking to [[BlueSpike]]. BlueSpike (posing as Max) wanted to get Chris to burn down his house. Chris did not want to do that, so he began to sing "I'm a Little Piggy", hoping that this would satisfy BlueSpike.<ref>[[Julie Reveals Herself#Burn your house down (35:20-37:50)]]</ref> In the aforementioned episode, Scott makes Cartman sing the the same song for his own amusement.
*Chris referred to Randy Marsh's "naggers" controversy ("[[Wikipedia:With Apologies to Jesse Jackson|With Apologies to Jesse Jackson]]").<ref>[[BlueSpike Skype Logs 10]]</ref>
*He created a ''[[Guitar Hero]] South Park'' [[Quizzes|quiz]].
*He used Cartman's catchphrase "You’re breaking my balls here" in [[SHOWDOWN: The TRUE CWC Confronts The FAKE]].
*He got Panda a musical card where Cartman/Jennifer Lopez sing the "Taco Flavored Kisses" song from "[[Wikipedia:Fat Butt and Pancake Head|Fat Butt and Pancake Head]]."<ref>[[Clyde E-mails]]</ref>
*On 30 [[October 2013]], Chris wrote that one of the reasons he doesn't commit suicide is because "premature death leaves one in Limbo".<ref>[[October 2013 Facebook Posts# Reality Comes Knocking]]</ref> This belief does not cohere with the protestant theology of his [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|Church]], according to which salvation is achieved by faith alone. However, it is in line with the episode "[[Wikipedia:Death (South Park)|Death]]", in which it is revealed that the grandfather of a minor character is spending eternity in limbo for having his grandson euthanize him.
*In [[Chris Calls Clyde Out]], Chris mocks Clyde's Asian ancestry by impersonating him as [[Wikipedia:Tuong Lu Kim|Tuong Lu Kim]], a character who speaks English with a heavy Chinese accent.
*In [[June 2015]], Chris [[June 2015 Facebook Posts#Random-Access Swedish|replied]] to a Facebook post mentioning the Swedish Chef with a reference to one of fictitious Rob Schneider film trailers from "[[Wikipedia:The Biggest Douche in the Universe|The Biggest Douche in the Universe]]" (which, incidentally, brought popular awareness to the term "[[My Little Pony|Derp]]").
*Chris sang "I'm a Little Piggy" again in a begging video from [[July 2016]].<ref>[[HELP, PLEASE!!!#Comic relief for money right now]]</ref>
*In an October 2017 interview with [[CopperCab]], Chris mentioned he had not seen South Park in a long time but had heard about a joke the show had done about [[Trump]] on a top-ten list video by [[WatchMojo]].
*On 4 [[December 2020]], when asked what his favorite episode of the show was in [[Discord Q&A 11#Favorite Episode of South Park|Discord Q&A 11]], Chris stated that it was "{{w|Helen Keller! The Musical}}", the thirteenth episode of the fourth season.
*On 19 [[September 2023]], Chris gave an imitation of Eric Cartman's "Respect My Authority!" line to a couple who had a Cartman plush with them.<ref>[[Post-jail sightings (2023)#Undisclosed parking lot]]</ref>

==See also==
*''[[Aqua Teen Hunger Force]]''
*''[[Family Guy]]''
*[[Chris Calls Clyde Out]]
*[[CWCFlyingElephants]]
*[[Getting Foam Ed‎]]
*[[Re to Chris No 2 - SHE IS MINE NOW]]
*[[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean]]
*[[Quizzes#Guitar_Hero_South_Park|''Guitar Hero South Park'' MyBUZZ! quiz]]

==References==
<references />
{{TV}}
[[Category:Things Chris has ripped off]]
[[Category:Television shows]]

Song of Christian

2026-05-27T00:38:16Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

{{Articleofthenow}}
[[Image:Song_of_christian_1_1-51.jpg|thumb|"I hear [[United States of America|America]] singing as I sing of myself..."]]

'''''Song of Christian''''' was a poem that [[Chris]], at age sixteen, wrote for a [[Manchester High School|high school]] [[Chris and English|English]] class. Chris bases his poem partly on [[Homos|Walt Whitman]]'s [[Wikipedia:Song of Myself|"Song of Myself"]].

It is also the name of a '''video''' Chris produced about it on 15 [[May 1998]], the very first video Chris has produced (although not his first media appearance), where it later made an appearance on his [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|homemade DVD]]. In it, Chris recites his poem in what appears to be the dark, and rages about the F he got in school for the project. The dark colors are both the result of him forgetting to [[Chris and cinematography|use proper lighting]] (video cameras didn't come with night-vision features in those days) and the technical limits of the model he was using (see below). He also forgets to come up with something interesting to say before the camera was rolling.

Regardless, Chris's voice at age sixteen, compared to today, sounds more conscious and matter-of-fact, and it seems that he is actually trying to put effort into his speech as opposed to mindlessly railing off words (although he still does stutter a lot). What happened between this and the [[Harvey Birdman Commercial]] can be chalked up to Chris becoming more isolated from real-life people, and thus having less experience in speaking this way.

The video is shot in black-and-white and has murky video quality. While some have speculated this video was filmed on a [[Wikipedia:PXL-2000|PXL-2000]] camcorder, a camcorder that used audio cassette tapes and similar low-quality B&W video, the VHS artifacts suggest this was actually filmed with a Cortland black-and-white camera, which he had received for [[Christmas]] the year before; the camera is similar to the [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ixgsYAfZ8eo Tyco VideoCam], as it was operated by simply plugging it into a VCR and using a blank tape in the VCR to record footage. The camera is unique in that it operates by capturing infrared light, which not all standard light bulbs emit abundantly - this may provide further explanation for the lack of acceptable lighting in the video.

It should be noted that, at the age of 16, Chris doesn't appear to fully understand conception, expressing belief that there is a chance Barb could conceive a child at the age of 56.

==The actual poem==

<blockquote><poem>“I hear [[United States of America|America]] singing, as I sing of myself,
And you experience, as I experience.
The problems of yourself are my problems.
The youth and the young singing cries of happiness,
As you have sung the song of laughter.
At age six weeks, I sang this song of laughter
Then, at one and a half years of age, the Lord [[1980s#Events of 1983|put the mute button on me]].
Those are my parents' song. They pulled me through to talk again, at age seven.
I am now sixteen years old and good at talking enough to help me achieve...
New goals and ''[[Super Mario Bros.|Mario]]'' raceway records, and to finish my [[Homemade Nintendo Power magazine|homemade ''Nintendo Power'' magazine]].
The magazine's songs, the ballad of ''[[Sonic the Hedgehog]]'' on Game Boy.
The rudeness of the teenager's song,
The despicable mention of rude words and...[[Tobacky|D-R-U-G-S]].
I am not afraid to speak, despite the hazardous flukes in America's song.
My song that I sing, although I talk well,
My peer relationship is low, and my [[Feel So Lonesome|loneliness]] is off the [[Heart level|scale]].”</poem></blockquote>

==Part I==

{{Infobox/video
| name = "Song of Christian" ~ Part I
| ytid = eC4XNixKBq4
| stardate = 15 [[May 1998]]
| subject = Poetry
| style = {{Tragedy|text}}, {{Reason|text}}
| saga = {{HighSchool|text}}
| shirt = Unclear
| other = {{Leaked|[[DVD|Leaked]]}}
| previous = [[Sonic_the_Hedgehog_Watch_%26_Win_Sweepstakes#Video|''Sonic the Hedgehog'' Watch & Win Sweepstakes]]
| next = [[Song_of_Christian#Part_II|"Song of Christian" ~ Part II]]
}}

<center>Just showing off his [[Homemade Nintendo Power magazine|homemade ''Nintendo Power'' magazine]].</center>

===Transcript===

[''Simulates blowing a trumpet, or the sound of a diseased rooster, to mark his arrival.''] 

Welcome ladies, and gentlemen, to ''The Christian Chandler Show''! 
Bringin' ya lots of laughs, and all that neat ol' stuff. Now, here he is, the host with the most: Christian Chandler!

<div>[''simulates the cheers of a crowd through half-breathing, half-hissing, stopping to take a breath halfway through, and reveals himself to the camera'']</div>

<div>Good evening friends, and welcome to ''The Christian Chandler Show''. '''I''' am your host Christian Chandler.
Now, tonight, we are gonna talk about poetry. And uh, line— an', uh, behind the scenes of part of the lines—which got me inspired. An' I'm gonna express my feelings a little bit, so...please don't laugh. I feel— I'll feel embarrassed. Okay, anyway, my poem is called— entitled— "The Song of Christian". And I just did it last night, on May 14th, [[1998]].</div>

[''muttering in an irritated tone: "Gonna embarrass myself."''] Anyway, uh, I'm gonna do my poem, now, so, here goes. [''recites poem''] An' anyway that's my poem. 
Now, we gotta go behind the lines, and see how it all got inspired.

<div>Now the, uh, first line line "I hear America singing", and, uh, "sing of myself". I got those from the combination of the first line of, both, [[Wikipedia:Song of Myself|"Song of Myself"]] and—s I—s—I—[http://www.bartleby.com/142/91.html "I hear America singing"]. And the "experiencing" and ''problems'', bas-- I made those up myself. And of course, ya know, the, uh, youth. I'm talking about the young children, here. They start singing their cries of happiness when they are born. With their little [[Sonee & Rosey|'giggles' and 'tee-hee-hees'.]] [''[[sigh]]''] That's just the sound of laughter. At age six weeks, I started... the sound of laughter which is my—when I start talking. Now, my first word was "monkey", and here's how it happened. My mother and I went down to the [[Wikipedia:Best Products|Best Products]] store in [[Charlottesville]] many, many years ago. ''Of course you know at age six weeks I was born in [[1982]]''. [''sigh''] Anyway, uh, my mother was carrying me in her arms, and she was shopping, when then all of a sudden I said [''baby talk voice''] "mon-kee". An' there was a wo—uh, there was an old woman near by, and, uh, she suh—h—heard me and then came over and asked my mom, "''Was that your son?''", and my mom said, "''Yup, that was my son''". Ahh... she didn't say anything, she was just shocked.</div> 

<div>An', anyway I, uh, went on—and—on with my mouth. That is until the age one-and-a-half... years... [''sigh''] The sad thing that happened... the Lord put the mute button on me. CLICK FLICK [''Light switch motion'']. That's when my ad—me—I'm representing my autism, there. The Lord clickin' the mute button. [sigh] An' anyway here's where my autism began. I'm gonna to be very truthful here. Uh, I had a babysitter, but, uh, she was kind of [a] mean [[Abusive babysitter|babysitter]]. Anyway, ah, one day she was on her phone and, uh, I came up t—I came up to her, I came up with her, and said something and, uh, she was kinda angry at me, 'cause I interrupted her phone call, AND she locked me [[Chris's room|in a room fulla noth—n—fulla nothing but toys]], and, uh, she just locked me in there, and, uh, I was very lonely, so I just sat there and cried, and... uh that's how my [[autism]] began. Thanks to an evil babysitter.</div> 

<div>And then thanks to my parents—actually my ma did most of the work, but, uh, it was thanks to my parents. They got me talkin' again at age seven. An', anyway, here's how they—it happened. My mother, my mother, always took me down to the toy store, ahh, at least every weekend on... [''sigh''] to, uh, wa—l—look at the, to read packages. Like, say, for example, "Go-Bots." You remember those old goh—fashion Go-Bot toys? Well, anyway, with ma we always read thepackageis [''All in one breath''] for me, and I read along with her. And, uh, well, we just read the, uhh, top name of the fi—name of the toy, and the name of the, uh, to—and the, uhhh, name of the... character that it represents. And, then, on an the—go to the flip side and see all the other characters, name all the other toys in the collection. And, ''of course'', we did the same for fu—the old-fashioned Transformers. Yes. [''Head confidently turns to look at items off-camera'']</div>

And, also, wit' mother an' I—and, also, sometimes, mother and I'd buy some Lego sets and build them together, like, for example... [''mumbles about getting his "stupid thing"''] Oh, yeah... Lllike, for example, this old, uh, bicycle pit shop, here. Ah, you can tell this is an old-fashioned [[Lego]] set on account of this—the old-fashioned "Lego Land" on the corner. Anyway, ah, we always built something like this, but, uhh, since that... and, one time, we even built a nice racetrack. I don't still have my Lego tin, but, uh... I NAMED MY CAMERA NIBBLE(?)... [''sigh''] I don't think... that it's good to have. Uh, oh, well, anyway.

''Excuse me''.

[[Image:003-NPSon.jpg|thumb|right|The homemade ''Nintendo Power'' magazine.]]

Anyway, Mother and I always had fun together. But, then, at age five—age seven, my mouth blabbed, ah—I started blabbin' my mouth, again. [''Voice cracks''] Daarn that collar! And then, uh, the, ah, "Helping to achieve new records on ''Mario Raceway''". You know I like the play video games. I mean, I have Nintendo 64 video games, the Super Nintendo games, Genesis, old-fashioned Nintendo, Game Boy, Game Gear, Sega CD, 32X, and I also got lotsa Tiger-brand LCD games. An', anyway, I was a video game p—person, and my favorite type of game were racing. So, um, one of my favorite Nintendo 64 games were—was ''Mario Kart 64''. I'r, uh, I was already tryin' to beat my ghost on the, uh, ''Mario Raceway'' Time ''Trails'' mode. My best time—my best record is, as Mario, ah minute, twenty-one, and eighty-nine seconds. Me—uh... ''excuse me''... I mean a 1'21"89. Yeah, that's it. An', anyway, I always like to beat my records.

But then the, uh, Nin-ten-do Ma-ga-zine that's da'uh maga-zine you heard that was lost. There it is: my ''home-made'' ''Nintendo Power'' magazine. Actually, that's just the cover. [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|I'm, ah, working on it]]...on the ''insides'', like a regular ''Nintendo Power'' magazine. When I'm done it should have a hundred-and-eight pages, including the front cover, and the back cover. Ah, right now I'm only on, uh, page 35. [''sigh''] I'll show you, ah, the pages that are inside it. We have your, uh, your, ah, type of contest that they're mentioning of the main article... that goes with the table of contents ''there''. [''sigh''] Then, we have the winners section. Now you seen the, uh, the two envelopes on this page? I actually created them on u—other envelo—on two envelopes myself an' kinda copied that from the envelopes onto ''here''. And, on this page, the three of those, I just kinda made up myself. That's, uh, ''Cruis'n USA'', ''Zelda'', and ''Yoshi's Story''. [''Christian exhales and ruffles through the pages'']. And we have the, uh, ''Power Charts''. Which is the Top Ten Nintendo 64, and Super Nintendo, and the Top Five Game Boy games. Of course, the Most Wanted, and some more letters, and I just a made up a article about somebody winning the ''Zelda'' contest. Ya know, test the ''Zelda 64'' game that is gonna come out later. WAAAY later, I—in fact, we don't even know—we're not exactly sure WHEN it's gonna come out. ''Darnedest thing is slippin' on me'' [Christian reassembles the magazine].

<div>An anyway, I had this dream a long time ago about ''[[Sonic]]'' on Game Boy, so that's what I based my magazine on.
'Course you can ''tell'' on the cover he's switched from Sega to Nintendo. SO, I started off by making my own Nintendo 64 game: Sonic 64. Isn't that a cool picture, or what? [''shoves crude drawings into the camera''] Alrigh', anyway, you got your castle over ''there''. Sonic and Tails. '''Scuse me a sec''... [''he fiddles with his papers for a good while'']</div>

====Factual error====
It is physically impossible for him to have spoken a word at six weeks old. Any [[Chris and health|doctor]] will attest to the fact that no infant's vocal chords are developed enough by that time to speak, and any [[Chris and psychology|psychologist]] will tell you that their [[wikipedia:Broca's area|Broca's area]] is not anywhere near developed enough to understand words by this time.

==Part II==
{{Tardrage}}
{{Infobox/video
| name = "Song of Christian" ~ Part II
| ytid = G9qf5aYpjRg
| stardate = 15 [[May 1998]]
| subject = {{Rumors|text}}, {{Video games|text}}, [[Chris and Art|Artwork]]
| style = {{Rage|text}}, {{Reason|text}}, {{Crazy|text}}
| saga = {{HighSchool|text}}
| shirt = Unclear
| other = {{Leaked|[[DVD|Leaked]]}}
| previous = [[Song_of_Christian#Part_I|"Song of Christian" ~ Part I]]
| next = [[Mario_Kart_64_Lego_Raceway#Prototype|''Mario Kart 64'' Lego Raceway]]
}}
<center>[[Chris]] [[virgin with rage|rages]] between 7:38 and 10:05 if you want to skip all the shit no one cares about.</center>

===Transcript===
[''Chris mutters under his breath: "Darn that thing.", and fiddles with the papers.'']

Uh...this may even be a rumor, so you— my magazine is falling apart on me. I mean it's just ''paper clipped.'' So sue me. I'm jus' still [[THAT_IS_MY_HOUSE|working on it]].

[''Continues looking through pages'']

Now, let me just find that page again... Well, they have the old castle, again, but now I got the special moves, the spin dash, pound the baw—pound the ground, spin, punch. There's that cool picture of Sonic co—in the co—in the corner. Isn't that cool, or what, huh? Three DI-mensional. That's what I call cool. Yeah....

[''Mumbling and looking through pages.'']

And, then, I have Sonic's friends that help. Of course, Tails (that flies), Knuckles (that punches and flies), and [[Bionic]], WELLLLL, you heard rumors about Bionic: he's that Sonic's brother I made up myself who's that very good basketball player and mechanic. Uh... I can tell you the background story on him. I could tell you about it... I'll just make it quick so I can tell you, anyway. Bionic was Sonic's older brother. Please note "older". Anyway, one day, when they were very young, they were playing a ca—playing the game of catch, Sonic accidentally threw the ball into the bushes. Bionic offered to get it, because he was closer to it. He went in the bushes, but, then, there was a—but there was a warp... p—portal there, and he got sucked into it. Sonic tried to get him out, but Sonic fell into it, went to a dimension of ba—abou—basketball. But then, uh... years later, Bionic found a way to es—found a portal to go back to Sonic and end up in Sonic's... new home in Knothole. And, uh... Sonic and Bionic lived together from then on. Anyway, he's a great mechanic too.

Anyway, I got some pictures here that, uh...shows how Sonic's friends help him...climbing along Knuckles, Tails flying, Sonic...and Bionic...breaking a lot— destroying a lot— breaking a lot of Dr. Robotnik's evil machines.

And, yet, of course, you know, my, uhh, ''Sonic'' on Game Boy originally was ''Sonic and Knuckles'', but I decided to do something different in this magazine. ''Sonic and Knuckles '''II'''''... I mean, a sequel, yeah... Anyway, you got your coverage there, and I put a little Dr. Robotnik in the corner saying, (''changes voice'') "I HATE SONIC! AND I HATE THAT ECHIDNA, TOO!"

[''Bends over to adjust paperclip that is holding his homemade ''Nintendo Power'' together, muttering.'']

Oh, dear, the paperclip is slipping. Darn that thing.

[''Comes back up.'']

Yeah...and, of course, you know I've got my basic "coverages" about a file...selector, and another water zone, Knuckles— playing as Knuckles, and a...special stage. Cool, huh?

[''Turns page.'']

And then I made up a Super Nintendo game. ''SUPER Sonic''. Yeah it's a Super Nintendo game with all— with some of the ''Sonic'' games in one Super Nintendo cartridge. Hey, look, check this out, we got Sonic hanging ten on a Super Nintendo controller. YEAAAH! (''hums music'') Anyway, then I got some...coverage on the...Sonic, uh...with the...how you select the game you wanna play. And of course I got ''Sonic I'' picture there, and ''Sonic 3''.

[''Flips through pages.'']

Oh, dear...

And then I have the uh...coverage on the games. I got ''Sonic I'', ''Sonic II'', ''Sonic III'', and ''Sonic and Knuckles'' in there... yeah, the original ''Sonic and Knuckles'' I'm talking about, not ''Sonic and Knuckles II''.

But, then, I made up another Nintendo 64 game. Uh...sort of interesting to teenagers. I call it ''BEAST WARS''...''[[Transformers]]''. And except these aren't about the missions; they're fighters. Yeah, that was the Maximals and Predacons fightin' each other. And I made somes—fantasize—suh that... it will be RumblePak compatible. And becau—and the uh... bots that I put in it...goes as follows. I got [[Optimus Prime|Optimus Primal]], and uh...Cheetor... Rattrap, Silverbolt, Dinobot, Megatron...Tarantulas, Waspinator, Quickstrike, and Inferno.

And then I, uh...before Soni- before I made the cover of Sonic, I made up a, uh...other ''Nintendo Power'' cover, which I made of...uh...you heard of ''Megaman XTC'' Nintendo? Well, that's what I did. ''Megaman XTC '''IV'''''. Check that out. Cool picture. IT'S BACK. And then there's some coverage, uh...about some of the stuff about him in the...Sigma's return...Zero being captured, and...X's armor. It's actually revived armor... The— from the original first— the first ''Megaman X'' game...except more powerful, because it's, uh, actually... Oh, whatever...

Anyway, I got a bunch of bosses from the three ''Megaman X'' games and a couple of the classic ''Megaman'' games. I got Storm Eagle, Snake Man, Wheel Gator, Neon Tiger... [''mumbles "oh jeez" while flipping through pages'']... Gravity Beetle, Bubble Crab, Shadow Man... and, uh... why not ''Megaman X'' without the old... classic ''Megaman X'' boss... [''fumbles with pages''] Oh, dear... these things are slipping on me... Anyway, Chill Penguin. Yeah, that penguin is back, alright. I ]got each of these bosses as 3D battle zone, and of course, now, I got coverage of Sigma's return. I got Robotis dog reform [''likely "Robotis Dog's Return"''}, then I made up a new dissent (?) for old Dr. Wily, Dr. Wily Jr. He's fighting Megaman in a robot MONKEY. Monkey... And then I got Sigma's return... and this is actually from that cover of Meg—that cover I made up. I mean, it's actually destroying Sigma, but this is from his, uh, view. It's actually from the opposite side... of the battlefield.

So right now I'm working on the classified information... begun with Sonic— parts of ''Sonic I'' and ''Sonic II'', and I just did ''Mario Kart 64''. And for ''Nintendo Power''...I'm tracing another copy. Yeah, you can tell it's another copy, because— lookit there. Sonic is a bit more, uh...chubbier there. You can tell the difference right there. All right, on, um... this tracing thing, I only got to page 60, it was the beginning of ''Super Sonic''...

But, moving on... yeah... the rudeness of the teenagers song... of course, now—of course, you know I'm talking about those despicable rude words they got down in there... I mean... ah, you know, w-w-when they say those... sound like, somethin' like... "Oh, *booop*." And, uh... "Oh, *booop*", and "son of a *booop*"... You understand what I'm talking about? I mean, that just really ticks me off. And I hope this video's getting through to those tee—to those students in that English class of mine. I HOPE THEY GET IT THROUGH THEIR HEADS AND EV— AND GET IT THROUGH TO EVERYBODY ELSE IN THAT SCHOOL, THAT THAT RUDE LANGUAGE IS CRUEL. I mean, you see it, and—you thinks it's cool to the adults, BUT YOU SHOULD NEVER EVER DO IT. I MEAN, IT'S JUST RUDE! VERY RUDE! I MEAN, I'M JUST SICK OF IT! I mean... [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 27th, 2009|HNNNNGH]].

And then there's that other thing... the, uh... D-R-U-G-S. I mean... (''mimes smoking'') That just... that *puff puff* [[tobacky|thing]], that just clogs up my nose. *grunt* And that other thing... (''mimes drinking alcohol and passing out'') Anyway, just MAKES ME SICK to see people just [[Sonichu|waste]] [[Little Big Planet|their]] [[Love Quest|lives]] [[Guitar Hero|away]] on [[alcohol|that]]. I mean, [[Chris and hypocrisy|it's DESPICABLE (''hits table''). DE-SPIC-A-BLE!]] Understand what I'm talking about? And, of course, I'm not afraid to speak about the hazardous flukes like [[Chris and copyright|the "American Song" how it goes]]... and, of course, that last line there... The song I sing you and all my—talk about my peer relationships as well... I talk about the peer relationships in my neighborhood. I mean, I do not have that many peers in the neighborhood. All I have in my neighborhood is Damien, and I don't usually see him a lot, and a twelve year old boy named Michael, and he's uh... just a little kid.

Anyway, I'm just usually lonely at home. Don't have a second player to play with. I don't even have a little brother, and I'm s—still hoping for one. Anyway uh... I see by the clock that it's about time I sign off. But, uh... before I go, I have just one thing to say to, uh... the teacher: '''[[Chris and anger|AN F IN ENGLISH CLASS?! YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!]]''' I mean, an F! I DO NOT EVEN KNOW WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME I GOT AN F... I MEAN, WHO KNOWS? IT COULD'VE BEEN BACK IN OLD GREENE COUNTY, THAT STUPID PLACE... YEESH. That Greene County Primary... actually that was a nice school, but then th—came the [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|Nathanael Greene Elementary]]. That's probably where I got the F. Anyway, then, many years rolled by... [[Honor_roll|'''THEN YOU CAME ALONG AND GAVE ME AN F]]. I MEAN I STARTED OFF WITH AN A AND YOU JUST LOWERED IT! LOWERED IT! LOWERED IT! I'M GETTING SICK AND TIRED OF THIS LOWERING THING. WHAT DO YOU HAVE AGAINST AUT—[[Slow-in-the-minds|AGAINST THE HANDICAPPED CHILDREN]], ANYWAY?! I MEAN, I KNOW MY HANDICAP IS [[Kick the Autistic|AUTISM]], AND I'M NOT AFRAID TO ADMIT IT! AND YOU, MRS. BIRD (Burns?), I THINK THAT F IS VERY DISRESPECTFUL! I MEAN, [[Chris and his ego|I AM VERY EMOTIONAL ABOUT IT]].'''

[''stress sigh'']

Anyway, it's time I sign off. Well, this has been ''The Christian Chandler Show'', and we hope you all enjoyed it. And, as we say in the land of TV Land...goodnight, folks!

[''covers camera with hand and "sings" theme song'']

==See also==
* [[Greene County Conspiracy]] – 12 YEARS LATER, Chris still sits in the dark and complains about people hating him for being autistic

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes]]|nextlink=[[Mario Kart 64 Lego Raceway]]|}}
{{HighSchoolSaga}}
{{Writings}}
{{CWC on TV}}

[[Category:Poetry]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos before 2007|1998-05-15]]
[[Category:High School Saga]]

Chris and cameras

2026-05-27T00:37:48Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

{{quote|Q: Why do so many of your videos have a greenish-yellow tinge? A: It's one of the flaws in recording with Sony's EyeCreate Program (a downloadable Playstation 3 Application that requires the [[PSEye|Playstation Eye Camera]]); THEY NEED TO FIX THE PROGRAM, not only of that tint from Lack Of Some Light, but the Audio/Video skips that seems to occur during recording.|[[Common Questions|Chris, believing it's all in the equipment]]}}
{{quote|Oh, and the Windows at that place were Tinted, so the photography would be best from inside the place.|[[Talk:Coffee Place#Do Not Delete; Pursue for the Drama.|Chris]], trying to troll us as [[JenkinsJinkies]]. Like we wouldn't know what tinted windows actually do to your photographs.}}

[[Image:camerawork2.png|thumb|For as much as he sucks at positioning photos, at least Chris is real good at hiding his failures.]]

'''Cameras''' are one of the most ubiquitous and defining inventions of the 1800s through today, allowing folks around the world to document their lives and create [[art]] without ever touching a brush. One of those folks is [[Chris]], who has been on both sides of the camera from an early age.

Chris's approach to camerawork is all kinds of abysmal, whether we're talking about still photography or video work. Despite years and years of constant and obviously enthusiastic photography and home video making, Chris hasn't learned anything beyond the basics of this craft. In fact, the way he still routinely fucks up things proves that he is handling cameras far ''worse'' than your average Joe with an iPhone...and as we've seen from [[12 October 2009|what Chris has done]] to his camera, "bad camera handling" can be interpreted in more than one way.

Chris's video production efforts have been hindered by the fact that, despite [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|years of practice]], he doesn't know anything about cinematography. He's oblivious to several bits of common sense, like "if you want to see anything at all, light the scene properly." Chris goes as far as to [[Brutal Legend|never even check his videos]] before uploading them, nor does he [[Live Drawing Streams|check his recording equipment]] before filming.

Note that not every failure in Chris's cinematography can be attributed solely to Chris; it's obvious that in some cases where he's in front of the camera he has gotten help that goes beyond merely using a camera timer or doing heavy-handed editing. Yet, he still fancies that he's in creative control, which proves that he just doesn't see any mistakes in his pet projects, no matter how obvious. If you end up as [[Mailbag 43#...Well, this is disturbing!|Great Director Chandler]]'s cameraman, he won't complain about your lack of talent (nor compliment you if you outdo him), unless you fail to draw Rosechu's tail correctly.

==Chris's cameras==
Chris's camera equipment has been fairly mediocre over the years, even by home video standards.

His first known camera was a Cortland video camera, a cheap budget device not unlike the later [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ixgsYAfZ8eo Tyco VideoCam]. It filmed black-and-white VHS footage, and it was not a camcorder – you needed to plug it into a VCR. Chris used this camera for [[Song of Christian]], his earliest known self-recorded video. The low-quality footage (even for its time) shows as half of Chris's face is black throughout the clip.

Chris's primary camera from the classic era was his ''[[PSEye]]''. That camera had seen enough abuse to start randomly stuttering and losing connection mid-video. Chris took better care of its successor, the [[PS4]] camera, though he didn't know how to turn off the default background music while recording for some time.

Chris's other classic era camera was a Kodak EasyShare CX7330, which he got during its launch year of 2004, and used from that year up to 2012. It too saw its own share of physical abuse, but that wasn't enough to damage it the same way it did with the PSEye. The camera was primarily made for pictures, but was also capable of recording videos; however, as an early digital camcorder, it was only capable of videos up to a 240p resolution and ran on a much lower frame rate.

Chris has been an early adopter of mobile device cameras: he has owned a Game Boy Camera and a Nintendo DSi, the latter of which was used to shoot photos of [[Michael Snyder]] in the [[GAMe PLACe]]. Chris owns two iPhones and regularly uses them for pictures and videos – these are perhaps his highest-quality cameras, offering 12-megapixel resolution.

Chris borrowed a proper film SLR for [[A Week With Christian Chandler]], proving that poor equipment is far from his only photographic failure.

==Framing the shots==
[[Image:Gibson.jpg|thumb|This is an excellently centered image, with a delightful backdrop.]]

Chris assumes that if he can see the lens, then everything can be seen by the lens. He has no idea what it means to be in the focus of a shot, and is constantly standing way out of center, or putting stuff so close to the camera you can't even tell what you're looking at. A shining example is [[ToJackie|a video to Jackie]] in which he "swore on the Bible," yet the poor framing makes it impossible to tell whether the object he holds is actually a book, let alone a Bible. When handling the camerawork directly, Chris often attempts to experiment with the camera's positioning without properly considering what his audience will see, and as such we are on the receiving end of [[Videobooks|many]] [[Sonichu's Edge|masterpieces]]. Additionally, his lack of proper equipment or controlled co-ordination tends to [[Obesity|weigh down]] such endeavors with constant shaking, or disorienting angles, especially in [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|videos]] [[Don't Mess With Me|where]] [[Bunny Hop|he]] [[100 2278|moves]] [[CWC Fighter|around]].

In some of his more recent videos, such as [[Doxing Jeff/Francine]] from [[November 2015]], Chris has taken to using the image stabilization feature on his iPhone to help steady his shaky-handed recordings. The result is a wobbly image against a mostly black background when the videos are put up on YouTube, which doesn't make things any much better.

==Focus==
Chris relies extensively on autofocus. Autofocus usually works with a slight delay and it usually can't focus on subjects that are too close to the camera. Many cameras have a specific autofocus mode or require manual focus for [[wikipedia:macro photography|macro photography]]...and judging by some rather blurry shots in [[A Week With Christian Chandler]] (probably shot with a 35mm SLR camera from the school), he can't even get the latter right. While professional photographers do use autofocus, it is less common for serious video work, and unheard of in professional filmmaking (focus pullers are still hired for a reason).

==Lighting==
Light is the essence of vision – "photography" comes from the Greek for "writing with light". Most photographers, even casual iPhone users, know that lighting can make or break an image. This basic fact escapes Chris.

===Classic era videos===
[[File:0779-CWCREAR.JPG|thumb|right|Chris's clueless flash photography is one reason why we know so little about his room and so much about his wardrobe and skin conditions.]]

Most of Chris's [[YouTube]] videos have been lit completely wrong. Plainly put, if you're making videos indoors, ''you've got to turn the room lights on!'' Human brains can automatically adjust to different color temperatures, but film and video cameras either lack the automata to handle this, or are constantly struggling in bad lighting conditions to figure out what's going on. Cameras also have to amplify the weaker image of a dark scene, resulting in a grainy, staticky image.

Chris assumes that if there's enough natural light coming in for him to see anything at all, then the video is lit properly. As a result, many of Chris's indoor video shots have a distinct, disgusting yellow tint that make it look like it was shot in a jar filled with pee (indeed, many have compared Chris's videos to that of [[wikipedia:Piss Christ|Piss Christ]]). Of course, it also doesn't help that he has never heard of [[wikipedia:Color balance|white balance]]. This is somewhat subverted with his videos shot on his [[iDea Book Case|iPhone]] and his PlayStation Camera, but other factors hamper down whatever merit he gets out of it.

===Backlighting===
Many of Chris's photographs, as in the Scrapbook and A Week With Christian Chandler, have been shot against light (i.e., camera facing the light source). This usually leaves the subjects in shadow and obscures the details. Backlighting isn't always a bad thing – when done outdoors, it will highlight the subject's hair and create a beautiful halo effect (especially during a sunset), and it can flatter subjects who would squint if facing the sun. However, the technique isn't nearly as flattering when attempted indoors, and it generally requires proper exposure, editing, and/or HDR to get right. Since nearly all of Chris's work is shot indoors, you can guess how it turns out.

===Flash photography===
Chris also commits a common novice mistake in thinking that camera flash completely negates the need for proper lighting (a [[naïve]] view of "if it's day, everything is OK, but if it's night or you're indoors, then just use the flash"). In fact, flash will highlight the front of the scene, but it can also overexpose the shot if the subject is too close to the camera. Other results of using flash without other light include heavy contrast, unlit backgrounds, and stark shadows, all thanks to the [[wikipedia:inverse square law|inverse square law]]. Again, some photographers use this as an artistic effect (especially for dramatic shots), but Chris's sloppy approach doesn't add anything to the image.

===Today===
As of [[October 2015]], Chris has begun lighting his room before filming it, as evidenced in videos like [[Thank You from Christine Chandler]] and [[HelloLadyFans]], which lack a green tint. So far, this shift has stuck, as all of Chris's videos from that point are lit sufficiently.

However, "sufficiently" is the bare minimum. Many dedicated YouTubers use specialized video lighting or put some care into light placement, making sure the subject receives the right amount of brightness from the right angles. Chris, on the other hand, uses nothing but the overhead lights in his room, which spread a bit of light throughout the room from straight down. The resulting image is mediocre, flat, and unflattering, much like a DMV photo.

==Post-production==
[[File:Family Guy mirror.jpg|right|thumb|A shining example of Chris's amazing screenshot work.]]

As inept as he is at video production, he's equally bad at post-production as well. A good example of this is whenever he needs to put text on the screen during his videos. Even the simplest video editing software like Windows Movie Maker or iMovie will allow you to easily put text on the screen and make it so that anyone watching the video can read it, whether it's changing the color of the font or adding a drop shadow. Chris doesn't do this, opting instead to write the text on a piece of paper and film it with his camera. Probably the best example of this is seen in [[The July 10th Messages]] where, at the start of each of the videos, he films a piece of paper with a YouTube username while informing us that the video we're about to see is addressed to the user shown. In one of the videos, he has a message below the username that, because he never bothers to focus the camera, is completely unreadable. This wouldn't be a problem if he could just use software to add text to the video.

He did once use video editing software, albeit a really basic one that's built into the PSEye software, to add text and effects, in his [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|entry in the ''PaRappa the Rapper'' contest]] that the no-good [[Adam Stackhouse]] ended up winning. The result is the video makes even less sense than it did without the use of editing software. The effects added to the video are all stock effects, most of which make no sense in the context of the video. For example, in one part, Chris put up a graphic that reads "Birthday Boy" on the screen, even though the video had nothing to do with his birthday. One can argue, though, that this was his attempt at [[random-access humor]] and that it's not supposed to make sense.

This is not to say he can't edit, because there are a couple of music videos that show that he can, indeed, put shots together in a way that the video conveys a message that it's supposed to. This is present in his music videos for "[[CWC Music Video Holding Out For a Hero|Holding Out for a Hero]]" and "[[CWC "Boyfriend"|Boyfriend]]". Of course, they both suck, but the fact that he can at least put shots together proves that, if he could just learn how to use editing software for more than just putting shots together, he could be a filmmaker. Then again, he never learns.

When the video is uploaded to YouTube, most of the time Chris doesn't bother to name it. And when he does, he leaves the .MOV extension in the video title, suggesting that his videos are uploaded in the QuickTime format. Obviously, he wouldn't bother using any of his [[monthly tugboat]] purchasing a Mac when there are better things to [[Chris and money|spend your tax dollars]] on. Whether the computer in the kitchen has software that exports to QuickTime or his camera uses SD cards or other flash memory in a way that he can simply upload the video from the memory is a mystery.

In [[Some Favored Comedians]], Chris, in an attempt to insert clips for comparison, records the TV screen. Recording things off the TV screen without extra preparation often results in a completely unwatchable picture, and this is no exception, as if the camera is focused on the TV, everything else in the room is darkened and a series of black lines appear on the screen. In this case, because the camera isn't focused, the TV shows nothing but bright, unfocused colors. Most people would think that ''actually editing the clips in'' might be a far more sensible strategy--Chris shows clips from ''The Cleveland Show'' and ''Family Guy'', shows that are readily available online and on Amazon Instant Video, iTunes and DVD. However, knowing YouTube's notoriously broken copyright system, which would allow [[wikipedia:Fox Broadcasting Company|Fox]] to take it down, it's possible Chris did this intentionally to avoid getting a copyright strike.

In [[Lars Is Jivin'.MP4]], Chris uses very obvious and clumsy jump cuts to disguise the fact that he missed the camera when he first tried to throw a tape dispenser at it.

Chris can't even take screenshots, a novice action, properly without screwing it up, as one can see in the ''[[Family Guy]]'' picture shown at the right. Not only does it display that Chris is unaware of software that can capture images on computer screens ([[wikipedia:Snipping Tool|one of which]] is ''bundled with Windows computers''), the shot he took of his computer screen is blocked by glare from the background lights, as well as the watermark that appears when a Hulu video is paused.

==Animation==
{{see also|Flipnote Hatena}}
Chris used to make stop-motion [[Lego]] animations, which were shot with the [[wikipedia:Game Boy Camera|Game Boy Camera]] and transferred to videotape (and eventually the DVD) using a combination of the [[wikipedia:Super Game Boy|Super Game Boy]] and a VCR. The main problem with these animations was the grainy picture quality, breakneck pace and lack of post-processing editing (there are very visible breaks in the animation). As such, it's very difficult to make sense of what's going on in these animations.

Later on, Chris started doing Lego "animations" with a regular video camera. [[A Sonichu Day]] and [[PlayingHouse]] are good examples of this. These efforts are all wrecked by being out of focus, and Chris's hands blocking the view most of the time when anything worthwhile happens. Nowadays, creating stop-motion animations is relatively simple with just about any digital camera and video editing software, but this is probably way out of Chris's technical competence and lack of patience.

Chris showed significant improvement in animation with the release of [[A Moment With Dr Wolf Chris Chan and Greater Struggles]]. Not only did he improve his filming techniques, he even occasionally uses scene transitions, demonstrating a limited knowledge in special effects and editing.

==Green screen==
[[File:Greenscreen hair.jpg|thumb|200px|Chris's hair blending into the green screen]]
In Chris's [[2023]] return to social media, he began posting videos recording with a green screen as the backdrop. This enabled alternating backgrounds to be displayed, such as a Colosseum in [[Setting the Record straight - there never was any sex involving me in 2021]] and fanart of Sonichu and Rosechu in [[The Return of Jesus Christ Chan Sonichu Prime]].

Occasionally there were technical mishaps with the green screen feature. In [[Angelica Rosechu's Christmas Play]], Chris's blue-colored [[hair]] is blended into the woods-themed backdrop. In [[First JCWCSP Gaming Live Stream]], Chris holds up his green-colored [[pickle]] stress toy but it blends into the red-colored backdrop.

==Other photography failures==
[[A Week With Christian Chandler]] includes a bunch of black-and-white photographs that were apparently done as part of a photography course. The photographs themselves are probably shot on 35mm SLRs, with manual iris and focus, and considering how many problems Chris nowadays has with digital cameras with ''automatic'' exposure control and focus, the results are not entirely unexpected.

Unlike color photography, black-and-white film and prints are easy to develop without complicated processes and overly expensive chemicals, so letting kids develop their own photos in school makes sense. However, failure is never too far away; Chris's report is almost a complete collection of common black-and-white photo development newbie mistakes. Most prints are over or underexposed, resulting in an overly dark or overly light print. Some have edges or corners underexposed, and one even has an underexposed band going through the image, which means that someone in the darkroom didn't quite grasp the idea of "not putting anything between the enlarger's head and the paper while the print is exposed". Some have smudges and fingerprints in resulting prints, owing to handling photographic paper with wet or dirty hands before putting it in an enlarger. One has visible dust, for the same reason.

The photos in the report, as well as some older photos, particularly the ones in the [[KCWC broadcast|slideshow]], have visible striping on them. This is likely due to the images being rescans of inkjet-printed photos, combined with DVD compression artifacts.

==See also==
*[[Captain's Log]]
*[[List of videos]]
*[[PSEye]]
*[[YouTube]]

{{Chris and}}

[[Category:Hobbies]]

Chris and the Internet

2026-05-25T06:51:45Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

{{Dated|Chris's general Internet activities/understanding from the late 2010s onwards, as this page was mainly written during the 'Classic Era'}}

[[File:Bob the Lumberjack.jpg|thumb|The proper response to a [[virgin with rage]] on the Internet.]]

{{quote|Hello. I am well-known on the Internet, sadly.|Chris<ref>[[EXCLUSIVE Manchester High School 2000 Reunion Required NOW]]</ref>}}
{{quote|I really detest the memes. M-E-M-E-S.|Chris<ref>[[Jeff is Beyond Denounced.]]</ref>}}

The '''[[Wikipedia:Internet|Internet]]''' – the bloodstream of our [[saga]]. It is a computational system that allows the transmission of data over long distances through a massive collection of networks connected all over the world. The Internet has grown immensely since its first real conception in the [[1980s]] as a means for the military, and later [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|universities]], to communicate with each other; it is said that about 6.4 billion<ref>https://datareportal.com/global-digital-overview</ref> people are connected to the Internet today. One of those people is [[Chris]], the Internet's [[Basement Rosechus|battered girlfriend]] who always comes back for more.

==Understanding==
Chris seems to be aware that the Internet is a place where, once you put something up, anyone with access to a computer can see it. However, due to a combination of his ego and his [[Autism|general inability to understand others]], Chris has come to the conclusion that if he puts anything on the Internet, ''everyone'' will see it; and if you direct a message to someone, only ''they'' will see it. Chris has in the past attempted to address videos to specific people, from [[Congrats, Jack Black|celebrities]] to [[Shigeru Miyamoto|potential employers]] to [[Ivy|Internet girlfriends]] to [[Eid, Pmurt, Eid|his country's president]]. Most telling is [[100 2178|his 8 May 2010 rant]], which was addressed to anyone who served on the Greene County School Board in the early 1990s.

Chris sees no problem in revealing [[Honest Content|highly sensitive information]] in his videos, including his phone number, [[14 Branchland Court|street address]], and others' potentially identifying info (such as the real name of [[The Wallflower|the girl]] he desperately wanted to be his [[sweetheart]]). He doesn't understand that [[YouTube]] is a public website and not an instant messaging service, never paying attention to the deluge of comments he gets from horrified onlookers that definitively prove his [[For Julie's Eyes Only|"private"]] messages are anything but.

Chris has been on the Internet since the late [[1990s]], yet does not understand how to act online any more than he does in real life. While many users of the Internet contribute content, are polite and helpful, and generally [[Chris and the Law|follow any established rules]], Chris sees all websites as vehicles to spew his [[List of Chris's edits to the CWCki|self]]-[[List of Chris's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica|serving]] [[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile|version]] of the truth. Even worse, when given his own website, he audaciously claimed that [[CWC_Blog#January_2010|it was he who had control over the site]], not [[User:cogsdev|the Sysop]] who did the work of setting it up, or the [[Jack Thaddeus|advertisers]] who paid for it.

Out of fear of [[trolls]], Chris refuses to meet people online or interact with people he knows beyond 'closed doors'. He has tried to join public forums at least [[Trollin Train|a couple]] [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia|times]] without attaching his name to the account, but has outed himself either on his own or through his [[Chris and writing|unusual and distinctive writing style]], abandoning them when he feels unsafe from his trolls.

In the recent years though, he has been very active on [[Facebook]], [[Twitter]] and [[Discord]], using them as safespaces and content bubbles to bask in his own glory. He was in multiple self serving groups, such as [[The Place]], [[Golden Church of Sonichu]] or [[The Knights of CWC]], which served as places to spew out his horrid ideas and worldviews in a regulated environment to people who won't be bothered by it. When it was impossible, Chris opted to either block people who spoke against him or use multiple sock puppets to view people who have blocked him instead, a typical show of his [[Chris and hypocrisy|hypocrisy]].

==Fora==
Chris does not normally participate in forum discussions, either due to a dislike of reading, simple egotism or both. When he does, he always signs his message – be it a comment on YouTube, a rant on the [[Adult Swim posts|Adult Swim boards]], or a complaint about something in ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]''.<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20100806143004/http://forums.littlebigworkshop.com/t5/PS3-Workshop/Complaints-on-the-Sonic-the-Hedgehog-and-Werehog-Costumes/m-p/239893;jsessionid=C15F46579256D040386028A0EAB09412</ref> He never follows up on these posts either, nor does he read the comments left by other users, just like on YouTube. Any retractions or responses are saved for completely unrelated posts elsewhere on the Internet.

Common sense would suggest that Chris would fare well in the Internet forums, which are havens for socially-inept, thirty-something weeaboo man-children who still live with their parents. However, Chris has managed to fail here too. By appearing in the web as his usual nicknames or full names, and plastering ''Sonichu'' crap all over, he draws the attention of his trolls, and reacts predictably when they follow him. More importantly, if the trolls somehow fail to notice his new hangouts, he's quick to make enemies completely of his own accord, due to his [[Chris and his Ego|ego]], selfishness, and complete disregard of rules.

Chris is or has been active on many other mediums on the Internet. He has ran his own blogs and websites, posted videos on [[YouTube]], and communicated with the outside world through social media sites such as [[MySpace]], [[Twitter]], and [[Facebook]]. It was only through Chris's extensive activity on these mediums that made the complication of this huge extensive wiki possible. As of 2018 however, Chris's online activity has transformed from a naive manchild's [[Kick_the_Autistic|accidental comedy act]] to the [[Chris and reality|insane ramblings]] of an unhinged madman.

==Password sharing==
{{see also|Gregg Mays E-mails|2018 Twitter account compromise}}

One of the most cardinal rules of the Internet, taught to pretty much anybody of any age, is that you should never give away your password to an account you have on any website, since (obviously) this runs the risk of you being hacked by people like trolls and scammers. Chris, in his [[Honor roll|infinite wisdom]], has broken this rule on multiple occasions.

During the [[Miyamoto Saga]] in [[2009]], Chris was contacted by one [[Gregg Mays]] (really an alias of [[Clyde Cash]]), who wanted to help update his [[sonichu.net|website]] to promote [[CWC AC: City Folk Update|Sonichu's appearance]] in ''[[Animal Crossing]]'', and thus asked him to provide his username and password for his Tripod account. Chris was surprisingly somewhat hesitant to do so initially,<ref>[[Gregg Mays E-mails#January 7, 2009]]</ref> but when he was pressed with a deadline to give Gregg his password, he let his guard down. Shortly after this, Gregg hacked the site.

In [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3]], [[BlueSpike]], under the guise of [[Julie]], asked Chris if he could share his [[PlayStation Network]] account with "her". Chris was all too eager to give away his password to his then-[[sweetheart]], which would eventually caused his account to get hacked.

In fall [[2018]], members of the [[Teen Troon Squad]] posed as [[Magi-Chan]], and [[Chris and manipulation|manipulated]] Chris into giving him the password to his Twitter account, from which they would control for [[2018 Twitter account compromise|three months]].

==VPN==
VPNs can be used for several purposes, including security, anonymity, and bypassing country restrictions. The first known usage of a VPN was during the [[2018 Twitter account compromise]] when the [[Teen Troon Squad]] logged into Chris's Twitter to troll him by writing tweets in his name, but sometimes left their VPN stamp visible.

In [[2024]], Chris himself was observed using a VPN.<ref>[[February 2024 social media posts#RussiaIsMLPG5]]</ref>

==Bans==
{{Main|List of places that have banned Chris#Websites}}

[[File:BANHAMMER.png|thumb|left|Some people see [[duck|dicks]] everywhere on the Internet. Chris tends to see these instead.]]

As with many places in real life, Chris has found himself [[List of places that have banned Chris|banned]] from the few places he frequents online.

Thanks to [[Honest content|his screwed up conversation filter]], Chris has done stupid stuff and has had stuff taken down or been banned from places. However, due to his relative inactivity concerning Internet forums, he's banned from fewer places online than expected. He was banned from [[deviantART]] in the summer of 2009 for posting the uncensored version of ''Sonichu'' #9 without a NSFW tag, though he doesn't understand why - comments he left on the [[CWCipedia]] suggest that he is under the impression that his dA account simply vanished into cyberspace for no reason.<ref>[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=DeviantART DeviantART] on the [[CWCipedia]]</ref> He was also banned earlier for the uncensored version of ''Sonichu'' #8. Despite bouncing from one account to the next, Chris has only been [[The July 10th Messages|banned once]] from [[YouTube]]; however, unlike dA, Chris has constantly made new accounts after one was taken down or abandoned. He has also had posts moderated at [[GameFAQs]] when he attempted to solicit money for special characters in ''[[ModNation Racers]]''. When his "article" on [[Wikipedia]] was deleted and his talk page there got trolled, his account was indefinitely blocked, although the blocking admin mistakenly thought that he was a sock-puppet of a troll and not [[TRUE and HONEST|the real deal]].

His most grievous ban to date involves [[Flipnote Hatena]]. Between 29 June and 2 July, Chris had [[RomanticLabyrinth|the same Flipnote]] removed from the site ''4 times'' because of its sexual nature, with Chris thinking it was being removed by trolls instead of realizing the fact that a [[Nintendo]]-owned website wouldn't ''like'' having animated sex dreams being put on their site. Because of this and other Flipnotes he had uploaded and reuploaded, the mods briefly blocked Chris's DSi from uploading any further Flipnotes. When his ban expired, Chris resurfaced on the website and reuploaded all the Flipnotes that got him banned in the first place. (The entire situation wasn't helped by try-hard trolls flagging his animations in a desperate attempt to have an impact.)

One notices a pattern in all of this – Chris has a tendency to not read a website's terms of service or gain an understanding of websites he uses. When protesting his ban from Wikipedia for violating one of their numerous rules, he argued that he didn't have the time to read the pages upon pages of fine print that stipulated what constituted acceptable behavior. When faced with a similar conflict on Flipnote, he failed to get the hint that each deleted animation was violating the terms of service, even uploading a video anyone could tell was inappropriate for the PG-13 website no less than ''4 times'' before getting his console blocked.

===Bans from Orbiters===
{{Incomplete}}

==Attempts to leave the Internet==
[[Image:WantWoman.jpg|thumb|This is what Chris means when he says he is going to "[[03212010 C-Ya Later.MOV|go outside and enjoy life.]]"]]

As the saying goes, "when the going gets tough, the tough get going." However, in Chris's case, he takes this and butchers it – when [[trolls]] descend on him and [[Stress|torture]] him, he gets up and leaves. He's like a child who packs up all of his toys and goes out in the driveway when things don't go his way. For many trolls, this would be a great victory – threatening to quit the Internet forever is such a common reaction to trolling that it has its own term: "flouncing".

Of course, his game consoles are still hooked up to the Internet (where he plays video games, reads game forums and logs into YouTube), so he never really leaves for good, he merely changes his outlet. When Chris talks about quitting the Internet, he means ceasing video and comic production, and no longer tangling with trolls.

His [[Youtube Finale|first attempt]] to abandon the Internet was when the [[Ivy]] saga was hitting its peak; tired of [[Clyde Cash]]'s trolling, Chris proclaimed that he was leaving the Internet. Instead of doing that, he disappeared for all of 2 weeks before creating a new account on YouTube. His [[03212010 C-Ya Later.MOV|2nd]], [[100 2188|3rd]], and [[100 2189|4th attempts]] all seemed to have been directed by an [[Rocky Shoemaker|outside force]]. Of course, Chris being Chris, he never made good on his word to stay off.

[[File:CWC Cycle.png|thumb|left|200px]]

After he made his second announcement of leaving the Internet, he made a [[Cleveland Show Voice Rant|rant about ''The Cleveland Show'']] a mere ''36 hours later''. He also made his 4th announcement of leaving the Internet just ''4 days'' after making his third announcement, saying that the [[Kick the Autistic|trolls have both made him scared of and scared him from the Internet.]] He returned just [[June062010.MOV|1 week]] after this grand proclamation. After talking about how he almost committed vehicular homicide, he makes his ''5th'' announcement that he is leaving the Internet.

Nearly 2 weeks after his ''5th'' abandonment of the Internet, he was spotted at [[Fridays After Five]] playing [[Flipnote Studio]] on his [[Nintendo]] DSi. He soon discovered the pictures and videos of him on the Internet and broke his exile to post his response to it all on Flipnote Hatena the next day, saying that he wishes trolls would stop spreading his bad reputation around. This shows not only that Chris is still looking out for his Internet reputation, but that he also assumes that by telling trolls "I'm leaving the Internet forever," he expects them to stop talking about him.

This would've been easy for the trolls to do, if Chris had just [[EXCLUSIVE Manchester High School 2000 Reunion Required NOW|stopped]] [[The MovingForward videos|making]] [[ItIsFinished.MOV|videos]] – especially ones [[Stardate, August 27, 2010|addressing them]] [[Haters Gonna Hate.MOV|specifically]] ([[Charlottesville_Fashion_Square#Chris_captured_on_video|not seeking out trolls offline couldn't hurt, either]]).

On 22 [[November 2010]] Chris [[100_2357.MOV|announced that he would be leaving the Internet]] ''yet again'', and began what would become his longest time away from the Internet. For an hereto unsurpassed period of time, Chris managed to refrain from doing something that would directly attract the attention of the trolls, although he was not completely able to repress his urge to spread his ego over the tubes, and thanks to his [[PS3]] with web connection and keyboard controller, he still made [[CWC's Collector's Case Tutorial|occasional]] [[Autism Tutorial|efforts]] to make the world realize his greatness.

Despite his claims to have stopped socializing online, a new [[Facebook]] account bearing a [[:File:CWCJuly2011.jpg|previously unseen photograph of Chris]] was discovered on 5 [[July 2011]], and two weeks later it was revealed that between 29 [[May 2011|May]] and 20 [[June 2011]] Chris was frequenting the forum [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia]] while trying (and failing) to stay anonymous. This culminated with [[Calling Out|three new videos]] released on 6 August 2011 after a 257-day YouTube hiatus.

Although unofficial, it is worth mentioning that after the death of [[Bob]] in [[September 2011]], Chris had not returned to YouTube for over 2 years, which broke his previous record of 257 days. Technically, that could have been considered a seventh Internet abandonment (with the only exceptions being Facebook and Twitter). However, in [[November 2013]], Chris uploaded a [[CWC_Lego_Manchester_High_School_Oct_18_2013|video]] he'd recorded the previous month, once again showing that, ultimately, he just can't resist [[Chris and his Ego|uploading things about himself]]. He continued to upload videos sparingly throughout 2014 and 2015, returning on a regular basis from October 2015 onwards.

==References==
<references/>
{{Videos about leaving the Internet}}
{{Chris and}}
{{The Internet}}

2007

2026-05-22T19:53:59Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

{{Honest}}

[[Image:0940-CWCsAppreaciation.JPG|thumb|Chris in '''2007'''.]]
[[Image:S2007.JPG|thumb|Graph showing the Google-popularity of the terms ''Sonichu'' (blue) and ''Christian Weston Chandler'' (red). 2007 is marked in [[Yellow Is a Mellow Color|Mellow Yellow]].]]
[[Image:ShecameforCWC (200803).JPG|thumb|On '''11 November 2007''', Chris felt uploading a [[She Came for CWC|drawing of him fingering]] [[Megan Schroeder|his best friend]] was the best way to protest the creation of his [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|ED]] page.]]
[[Image:063-2-CWCDVDWholeMaster.jpg|thumb|On '''11 February 2007''', Chris made a [[DVD]] about himself.]]
[[Image:SoulCalibur3box.jpg|thumb| On '''8 May 2007''', [[Mary Lee Walsh]] gets it in ''[[Soul Calibur]] III''.]]
[[Image:CWCinDailyProgressJuly142007.jpg|thumb|'''July 2007''']]
[[Image:Chrischannov2007.jpg|thumb|On '''26 October 2007''', this picture is taken at [[The GAMe PLACe]].]]
[[Image:MaryWantsIt.JPG|thumb|One of the images Chris drew on '''11 November 2007'''.]]

'''2007''': '''the year we made contact'''.

The second half of the year 2007 shows some important developments within [[Christian Weston Chandler]]'s life.

Firstly, Chris enters and loses the [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|''PaRappa the Rapper'' contest]], leaving him disillusioned and enraged.

Secondly, he discovers a satirical page written about him on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]. These two injustices lead Chris into a bitter, long and frustrated [[rage]], eventually giving spark to certain deep, complex and mysterious aspects of madness within his person, that, when revealed, would prove to be a decisive factor leading to obsessive [[troll]]ing in [[2008]].

==Events of 2007==

===February===
* '''11 February''' - Chris makes the cover for his [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|"Yep, I'm on TV" DVD]].
* '''19 February''' - Chris starts making the slideshow for his DVD.
* '''21 February''' - Chris sends [[Chris emails 2007#February|an email]] to [[Virginia Jeanine Sanford|Ms. Sanford]], his middle school teacher, telling her about how his life has been.
* '''22 February''' - Chris finishes the slideshow.
* '''24 February'''
** Chris's 25th [[birthday]]. A party is thrown at what appears to be [[The GAMe PLACe]].
** Chris releases his [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|"future message"]].

===March===
* '''4 March''' - Chris sends an email to his half-brother [[Cole]] in an attempt to reconnect with him. He asks if he'd like a copy of his new [[DVD]].
* '''5 March'''
** Chris draws the cover of [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]].
** Chris apologizes to [[Megan]] for criticizing her story ideas.
* '''6 March'''
** Megan tells Chris not to draw her animal characters with breasts.
** In response to an email from Chris about the DVD, [[Cole Smithey]] expresses his history with and disdain for [[Barbara]] and [[Bob]].
** Chris cashes in his first [[My Coke Rewards]] points, beginning a campaign that will see him consume more than 2,500 bottles worth of Coke.
* '''10 March''' - Chris buys the Officer Nasty Fantasy Doll and "The Best of Amateur Angels".
* '''17 March''' - Chris realizes that he is able to afford a 60GB PlayStation 3, so he goes out and invests in one.
* '''18 March''' - Chris bids on a used copy of ''Mortal Kombat Advance'' (for the Game Boy Advance) on eBay.
* '''26 March''' - Chris [[PSN blogs#29 March 2007 21:57 — A Few Playstation 3 Thoughts.|posts some complaints]] about the [[PS3]] on his PSN blogs.
* '''29 March''' - Chris makes a few more posts to his PSN blogs, leaving some of the same complaints he did on the 26th.

===April===
* '''24 April''' - ''[[Pokémon]] Diamond'' and ''Pearl'' are released in the US.
* '''26 April''' - Chris posts to his [[PSN Blogs]], claiming he is looking forward to the [[Adult Swim]] games featuring the [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force]] and [[Harvey Birdman]].
* '''30 April''' - [[Megan]] tells Chris for the umpteenth time to stop touching her, and says she is only a little annoyed.

===May===
* '''1 May''' - Chris creates a [[Soul Calibur#Chris vs Mary Lee Walsh|video]] of himself beating up [[Mary Lee Walsh]] in ''[[Soul Calibur]] III''.
* '''7 May''' - Chris tells [[Megan]] he's also created a video depicting her fighting in ''Soul Calibur''.
* '''8 May''' - Christian creates his first [[YouTube]] account and uploads his Mary Lee Walsh ''Soul Calibur'' video.

===June===
* '''June''' - Chris stops working as a volunteer assistant Gym Leader at [[The GAMe PLACe]].
* '''4 June''' - [[Megan]] tells Chris about her infatuation with a video game character.
* '''6 June'''
** Megan leaves for Kentucky.
** Ran Coleman Yeatts, Cole's biological father, dies.
* '''15 June''' - Chris makes a few posts to his [[PSN Blogs]], complaining about internet issues with ''Go Puzzle'', and announcing he has found a way to play ''[[Guitar Hero]]'' on the [[PS3]].
* '''27 June'''
** Chris states that he is saddened, as Megan has left for Kentucky. He misses her.
** Chris cries with his [[Barb|mother]] whilst thinking of his late dog [[Patti]].
* '''28 June''' - Chris sends another email to [[Megan]] discussing Patti and video games.
* '''29 June''' - Chris makes his ''PaRappa the Rapper'' video and enters [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown]].

===July===
* '''3 July''' - Chris sends another email to [[Megan]] in which he chats about his activities at [[The Game Place]] and says he misses her.
* '''4 July''' - Chris sees Michael Bay's ''[[Transformers]]'' movie with his [[mother]].
* '''6 July''' - Chris fills in Megan about new ''[[Soul Calibur]]'' cards and says he misses her.
* '''7 July''' - Christian buys a Velvet Touch masturbator, a Silicone Superstud Power Ring and a Titanium 5-Star Video Collection.
* '''11 July''' - Chris again writes to Megan to discuss video games.
* '''14 July''' - Chris goes to a rummage sale with his [[mother]] and tells [[Megan]] all about it. He gets featured in his local newspaper, the ''[[Chris in the media#Daily Progress|Daily Progress]]''.
* '''15 July''' - Chris tells Megan about a [[Spanish]] soap opera he bought with his My Coke Rewards points, and problems with his ear.
* '''16 July''' - Chris buys himself an [[Officer Nasty]] Love Doll (in contrast to the Fantasy Doll bought in March), A&E Hot Action Lotion in Strawberry, "Carmen & Friends", "The Perfect Secretary" and a "Wicked Hot Pics Photo CD".
* '''18 July''' - Chris hears his PaRappa video has made it to the final rounds. He is overjoyed. He emails Megan that he wants her to accompany him to Seattle if he wins.
* '''20 July'''
** Chris sends [[Chris emails 2007#July|an email]] to Susan Hannifan, a counselor at [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]], telling her to vote for him in the PaRappa contest.
** Chris also sends an email to [[Cole]] requesting his vote as well.
* '''21 July'''
** Cole responds to Chris with more hostility towards their parents. Chris tries flattery to persuade Cole to vote for him in the contest.
** Chris updates [[CWC's Pokésite 2|El PokéSite de RWC 2]] and "CWC's Vroom-A-Zoom!," his [[Hot Wheels]] site, to tell people to vote for him in the PaRappa contest.
** Someone leaves a cryptic negative comment on Chris's [[MySpace]] page.
* '''22 July''' - [[Anna]] tells Chris she voted for his PaRappa video and wishes him good luck.
* '''23 July'''
** Megan's 21st birthday. She is still in Kentucky, and Chris misses her.
** Susan Hannifan responds to Chris's email and says she will vote for him in the contest.
** Chris makes a post to the [[PSN Blogs]], urging people to vote for him in the PaRappa contest.
** Cole tells Chris that he'll vote for him if he can find out the name of his real father. Chris responds that according to their mother, it's Jack Dale Smithey.
* '''24 July''' - Cole tells Chris that their mother is lying about the name of his biological father, and asks Chris to tell him when "that fuck Bob finally drops."
* '''28 July''' - Chris fills Megan in about his activities at [[The Game Place]] and again shares his fantasy about going to Seattle with her.
* '''31 July''' - The polls for the PaRappa contest close. Chris makes several posts to the [[PSN Blogs]], urging people to vote before the polls close, and wording his anxiousness.

===August===
* '''1 August''' - Chris makes a few posts to the [[PSN Blogs]], talking about PS3 and his wish to be able to understand Japanese.
* '''2 August''' - Chris updates [[CWC's Pokésite 2]].
* '''3 August'''
** [[Adam Stackhouse]] wins the PaRappa the Rapper Contest. Christian, to put it mildly, is not happy.
** Christian immediately sends an enraged e-mail to [[Sony]]. He is furious because he didn't get the opportunity to impress Megan.
** In an e-mail to Megan, Christian admits to cheating to win the PaRappa the Rapper Contest.
* '''4 August'''
** Christian writes another angry letter to Sony, explaining why the other contestants should be disqualified.
** Chris curses Adam Stackhouse in his [[PSN Blogs#4 August 2007 — Adam Stackhouse!!!|PSN blog]], which results in an admin serving him with a (probably one month) ban.
* '''5 August''' - Chris informs Megan that he has complained to Sony about the rule violations by Adam Stackhouse and other contestants.
* '''6 August''' - Chris updates [[CWC's Sonichu Site!]]
* '''7 August''' - Chris apologizes to Megan for supposedly calling her his girlfriend in the PaRappa Contest, and professes his love for her.
* '''8 August'''
** Megan sends Christian an angry letter, complaining about his clingy behavior, and that she is happy he lost the contest as she didn't want to go on a trip with somebody who wouldn't stop touching her. She says that they can either remain solely as friends, or never see each other again. According to Chris: "It hurt so fucking much, it took me weeks to recover."
** Christian apologizes to Megan for his behavior.
** Chris sends yet another e-mail to Sony, apologizing for his anger, but still thinks he has won.
* '''10 August''' - Sony responds to Christian's e-mail. They don't take him seriously.
* '''Sometime between August 3 to possibly August 10''' - Chris uploads [[CWC is Angry]].
* '''13 August''' - Christian writes to Megan about having confessed his love to her.
* '''15 August''' - Chris bids on a Megatron Leader Class action figure on eBay.
* '''20 August''' - Chris buys himself another Officer Nasty love doll, possibly because his other one suffered an internal injury. He also purchases a "Mystery Feature", "Redlight Girls", "Extreme Behavior 2", and "Signature Series 10: Shayla LaVeaux".
* '''31 August''' - Chris tells Megan he will resume his Love Quest in September.

===September===
* '''4 September'''
** [[Bob]]'s 80th birthday. Chris makes him a cake.
** On the [[PSN Blogs]], Chris complains about not being able to go online.
* '''5 September''' - On the [[PSN Blogs]], Chris replies to a blog concerning login problems.
* '''12 September''' - On the [[PSN Blogs]], Chris talks about [[PSP]] update 3.7. He also talks about his login problems.
* '''17 September''' - [[Caden Peck]] turns 5.
* '''22 September''' - Chris posts a message entitled, "I WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS INJUSTICE!!!!" on his [[MySpace]] Sonichu Group.
* '''27 September''' - On the [[PSN Blogs]], Chris makes a few posts, one asking if he can use a [[HEXBox]] controller on a PS3.

===October===
* '''1 October'''
** Megan says that she is glad that Chris has backed off from his advances. Chris replies that he still pines for her.
** [[Barb]] turns 66.
* '''2 October''' - Chris is confronted by a [[jerkop]] at [[Alderman Library]].
* '''3 October''' - Christian buys a LAI MI Asian sex doll.
* '''4 October''' - Chris emails Megan, saying that he intends to keep going to Alderman Library for his [[sweetheart search]].
* '''19 October''' - Christian shows hostile behavior towards a friend of Megan.
* '''20 October''' - Christian apologizes to Megan for his hostile behavior. He blames it on his homophobia.
* '''21 October''' - Megan is annoyed with his behavior and tells him he should mind his own business.
* '''26 October''' The day that the trolling of Chris began. He is photographed at the Game Place playing ''[[Pokémon]]''. The same day, he gets [http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2636398&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=8#post335082042 mentioned] in a [[Something Awful]] thread (Requires ''Archives'' account to view), originally about fellow lolcow Ulillillia, by a student at the [[University of Virginia]] who saw Chris at Alderman Library that day looking for a boyfriend-free girl.
* '''27 October''' - Due to the Ulillillia thread getting derailed, a [http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2667671 thread on SomethingAwful] is created about Chris, titled "Sonichu and his [[Love Quest|quest]] for a [[boyfriend-free girl]]". (Requires ''Archives'' account to view, [http://web.archive.org/web/20071107074539/http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2667671&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=1 mirror].)
* '''30 October''' - Some guy asks Chris how he's doing in a [[MySpace]] comment.
* '''31 October'''
** The SomethingAwful Sycophant Squad (SASS) creates a thread on Chris titled ''Sonichuuuuuuuu...''
** According to Chris, the [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page is created. (According to the history, it was created a few days later).
** On the [[PSN Blogs]], Chris asks a question about [[God of War]].
** A troll posing as [[PaRappa the Rapper]] pokes fun at Chris in a MySpace comment.

===November===
* '''1 November''' - "PaRappa" and another troll mock Chris in MySpace comments.
* '''2 November''' - According to Chris, on this day he discovers the [[ED]] page and becomes furious. This is contradicted by the date of the page's creation.
* '''3 November'''
** The Chris-Chan article on ED is created at 5:45 PM (Ruckersville time) by [[Jason Kendrick Howell]].
** [[Evan]] collects some of the best images from [[4chan]]'s Fan-Art thread and e-mails them to Chris.
** Chris emails [[Megan]] that he was freaked out by Evan's fanart, and that he's informed a [[deviantArt]] member about [[Chris and copyright|copyright violation]].
* '''4 November'''
** Chris discovers the ED page made about him, and angrily e-mails a link of the "hellish embelishment [sic] of [his] person" to [[Evan]]. He then demands that Evan draw a picture of [[Rosechu]] "[[masturbating and squirtin']]".
** [[Vivian Gee]] [[Vivian Gee E-mails, 2007-2008|sends her first email]] to Chris, telling him that she has a similar but not identical character to Sonichu, and would appreciate it if Chris said it was original.
** Chris updates [[CWC's Sonichu Site!]]
** Chris uploads his [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|FUTURE MESSAGE]] to [[YouTube]].
* '''5 November'''
** A [[white knight]] tells Chris via e-mail that people at [[4chan]]'s /v/ board are making fun of him, and that they have made an [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page for Chris.
** Chris tells Barbara that he had been photographed at the [[Game Place]], and she goes mad.
** In e-mails to [[Anna]], Chris tells her that he's discovered his [[ED]] page. He also discloses that he has been chatting with [[Lori Lopez]], a fake [[sweetheart]] created by Christian's old friend [[Joshua Martinez]].
* '''6 November'''
** Somebody sends an e-mail to Chris, claiming that Chris has stolen his [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] character, and that Chris must take down his Sonichu comics in one week or face charges. Chris ignores the e-mail.
** Vivian responds to Chris about her earlier e-mail by ranting about how he is the one that makes his life suck. She ends by telling him to fuck off and die.
** Chris uploads five more old videos to his [[YouTube]] channel.
* '''7 November'''
** Christian shoots a [[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007|video]] asking to have the ED article edited to "better reflect his personality".
** Vivian sends one last e-mail to Chris for a long time, asking him to throw away his [[medallion]].
* '''9 November''' - [[Barbara]] goes to the Game Place and questions manager [[Michael (Game Place)|Michael]] about the picture that was taken. She asks to be offered a seat, but as there is no seat, she has to sit on the floor. Michael tells Chris that if he brings up ED once again, he will be banned from the store.<ref>[[Megan_Emails,_2008#Chris_emails_her_some_detective_work.2C_Megan_likely_doesn.27t_give_a_shit|Megan Emails, 2008]]</ref>
* '''10 November''' - A picture of [[Wikipedia:goatse.cx|Goatse]] is added to the ED page, and Christian finally breaks down and creates the Reldnahc account to remove it. He then begins [[List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica#November_2007|rewriting the article]] in a more favorable light towards him.
* '''11 November''' - In response to she-male and homoerotic Sonichu fan art on the ED page, Chris draws five [[Rule 34]] drawings and adds them to the article in protest. Most feature his Sonichu characters; [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|one in particular]] depicts himself fingering a woman who is later identified as Megan.
* '''12 November''' - Chris adds entries from his [[CWC's Diary|diary]], details about how he lost Megan, and information about his sex doll [[Officer Nasty]] to the ED page. By now Chris has willingly provided 90% of the information that will be used to mock him henceforth.
* '''14 November''' - Chris updates his Sonichu site.
* '''15 November''' - Christian tries to hack ED using HTML. It doesn't work.
* '''18 November''' - Chris emails Megan about activities at [[The Game Place]] and sends her a picture of [[Lori Lopez]].
* '''19 November''' - Chris tells Megan that he'll be meeting Lori soon.
* '''23 November''' - Chris buys a 160 GB SATA hard drive for his PS3, greatly increasing its storage space.
* '''30 November''' - Megan asks Chris for help obtaining some German music.

===December===
* '''18 December''' - Chris sends Megan a reminder about their get-together tomorrow at [[The End Games]].
* '''26 December''' - Chris buys [[Kimmi]], the anime love doll, on Adamandeve.com, probably because his parents didn't buy it for him as a Christmas gift.
* '''28 December''' - Once again, Chris returns to [[List_of_Christian%27s_edits_to_Encyclopedia_Dramatica#December_2007|editing]] the text of his ED article into a more positive one.
* '''30 December'''
** With a new ED account, "Chris-Chan", Chris starts vandalizing ED.
** Christian writes the poem [[For My True Love, I Would…]]
* '''31 December''' - Chris sends his recently completed poem to somebody in contact with Megan, and tells her to send it to her.

==References==
<references />

{{Timeline}}

[[Category:2007| ]]
[[Category:Chronology]]

To Clyde and Jack

2026-05-17T01:00:01Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

'''To Clyde and Jack''' (originally posted as '''To Clyde and Jack.MOV''') is a video uploaded by [[Chris]] on 27 [[December 2009]]. Chris tells both [[Jack Thaddeus]] and [[Clyde Cash]] to [[Chris and anger|commit suicide and burn in hell]]. Chris continues to be butt-hurt over [[homos]]exuals, telling Jack and Clyde that they are hurting the cause of gay rights and claiming [[List of Chris's lies|he has "Gay Friends"]]. Then he reminds us to [[Chris and hypocrisy#"I fear them all" — Homosexuality|stay straight]].

Chris spends much of this video scratching himself with alarming frequency, pausing at least 12 times to scratch, adjust his collar, hitch up his pants, or otherwise address some source of discomfort. The [[Chris and health#Hygiene|cause]] remains unknown, but it should be noted that Chris has worn the same [[Chris and fashion|long-sleeved polo shirt]] now for four days straight.

==Video==

{{Tardrage|1=border:4px solid #FF1493|2=[[Homos|flamboyant]]}}

{{Infobox/video
| name = To Clyde and Jack
| ytid = eXUm5tiHmyU
| Stardate = 27 December 2009
| subject = {{Homos|text}}
| style = {{Rage|text}}
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}
| shirt = {{YellowRedStripeShirt|text}}
| previous = [[Download For Play Only]]
| next = [[Address to my Cwcipedia SysOp]]
}}
{{quote|You're not putting any of those people in bright light! If anything, you're making the light of homosexuality so much God-damn worse!}}

=== Transcript ===
Uhh, this is not a [[Chris and reality|canon]] [[Captain's Log]], but I have a statement that I feel like I need to make. Both... [[Clyde Cash]] and [[Jack Thaddeus]]. This message goes to them!

You both think you're so tough. You both think you're so righteous because you're trying to overthrow [[Chris|somebody who hates homosexuals]]. You know what? I'm okay with associating with homosexuals, but I—not be—but the—not beyond f-friendship. I'll-I'll be willing to be friends with homosexuals, I even have a [[gal pal]] [[Anna McLerran|who's a lesbian]]. As a—and she's a good friend, as well! But I'm just saying [''gestures wildly''] nothing further with the male homosexuals!

And as long as they keep it behind their closed doors, I don't give a damn.

And both of you, Jack and Clyde. Both of y'all want me to like homosexuals more, a little bit, but you—both of you—you're not—put'n, the aspect of anybody, within that—within that lifes-w-w-wh—who's living that lifesty—who's living that lifestyle. You're not putting any of those people in bright light! If anything, you're making the light of homosexuality so much God-damn worse! You both are definitely '''evil seeds that just NEED to be put into hell'''!

So not only would you be would both you Clyde Cash and Jack Thaddeus, be doin' me a favor, but you'd be doing your whole God-dang homosexuality community a favor, by '''committing suicide, killing yourselves,''' <big>'''AND rotting in hell!'''</big>

[''As Chris says this, he shoots up both his hands, then both his index fingers, then finally both his middle fingers.'']

And [[Vivian]], I'm [[Chris and remorse|sorry]] about saying that about your cousin, but that's just the way I feel! [[Death threats#Vivian Gee|I got nothing against you Vivian]].

[''brief pause wherein Chris scratches himself and sighs'']

Anyway, that's the way I feel. Both of you two can just go rot in hell, for all I care. And for the whole world who care—and for whole world s—s—cares.

Also I just want to remind everybody that, uh, [[Chris chan (CWCipedia)|the revised version of the text]] that's on that God-dang [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page is up on the [[CWCipedia]]. You find a link to it under the portal on the CWCipedia. That's all I will say about that.

So that's just my point—that's just all those-p-all my views, and how—what's actually true and false, and exaggerated, from within tha—all that text. Right.

[''raises hands, closes eyes''] Okay, well, to most everyone, [''sigh''] stay straight and not being swayed any other direction. That's me. Alright. [''flashes peace sign''] Have a good day, most of you. And Jack and Cl-Clyde, yeah, [[Chris and religion|suicide, death, rot in hell]].

==Remixed==

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = three point plan for living
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Pyau0NoVyYg}}
| stardate = 27 [[December 2009]]
| maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/TheGreggMays '''TheGreggMays''']
| subject = [[Chris]]
| type = Remix
| info = SUICIDE. DEATH. ROT IN HELL.
}}
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Download For Play Only]]|nextlink=[[Address to my CWCipedia SysOP]]|}}

{{Troll Videos}}
{{ClydeCashSaga}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, December 2009| 2009-12-27]]
[[Category:Clyde Cash Saga videos| 2009-12-27]]
[[Category:CWCipedia Saga videos| 2009-12-27]]
[[Category:Videos about homos| 2009-12-27]]
[[Category:Kodak camera videos| 2009-12-27]]

May 2010

2026-05-16T00:38:05Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

[[File:ConspiracyChris.jpg|thumb| On '''8 May 2010''', Chris embraces a [[Greene County Conspiracy|conspiracy theory]].]]
[[File:AAmonthChris.jpg|thumb| On '''16 May 2010''', the [[Autism Awareness E-mails]] are leaked.]]
[[File:MODNATION_2.JPG|thumb|On '''May 26 2010''', Chris begs for ''[[ModNation Racers]]'' bonuses.]]
[[File:Copy.png|thumb|350px|On '''31 May 2010''', Chris defends his [[copyright]].]]

'''May''' was the fifth month of '''[[2010]]'''. It seemed to start off with a whimper, as [[Chris]]'s radio silence apparently continued even after the uploading of the FALSE and DISHONEST versions of [[Sonichu 11|''Sonichu'' #11]]. However, many were proven wrong when Chris finally reappeared, [[I Pimp My Ride.MOV|boasting proudly]] that he had been able to disconnect the Wi-Fi antenna from his [[PS3]], under the belief it was a [[PS3/How_the_PS3_is_Hacked|bugging device]] and not realizing the damage he had done.

On the 8th, Chris won four tickets to an extreme sports rally and called up [[Rocky]] to see if anyone in his church's young adult social group would want to go with him, but no one ever called back. Seeing as no one was going to go with him, Chris scalped three of the tickets and sat alone in the stadium next to a "lovey-dovey" couple while watching people with a far greater amount of success than him perform feats of acrobatics on motorcycles. After watching the events, Chris returned home lonely and upset, and made a video, wherein he is closer than ever to realizing how big of a fuck-up he really is, but, unsurprisingly enough, he blamed all of his current troubles on a [[Greene County Conspiracy|conspiracy]] he believes the [[Greene County]] School Board have staged against him. A week later, he put up [[05142010|another video]] where he used another tragedy to garner sympathy.

On May 13, DariaCamacho, a "fan-manager" for Chris, was given access to the [[CWCipedia]] and began making massive and seriously needed updates to the website. Chris reverted them and when Daria questioned why he did so, he once again blamed his autism, and went back to completely ignore the CWCipedia despite DariaCamacho's continued editing. On May 26, DariaCamacho was revealed to be [[Mao]] 'Bamboo' Ling, who, in a repeat of the event in March, reopened the CWCipedia for the public, causing a second wave of massive vandalism. Chris attempted to revert the mass vandalism before flat out giving up due to the stress of it all, and announced that he would abandon the CWCipedia. The website was promptly given by Mao to the [[gal pal]] [[Vivian Gee]], who now shares copyrights to the entire ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' franchise with [[Alec]]. On May 30, Vivian's ''Sonichu Season 2'' began. At the end of the month, Chris uploaded a video in which he stated that he was leaving the internet. [[Chris and hypocrisy|Again]].

==Events of May 2010==
* '''1 May'''
** The Sysop finally removes the [[Twitter]] feed from the CWCipedia page.
** A brief phone call between Chris and [[Sydney Kirsch]], who attempted to troll Chris during the [[Jackie]] [[saga]], occurs. Chris, in a rare moment of awareness, outed her as a troll and quickly shut her down; his heart level remained intact, and the unsuccessful woman was most likely executed by Clyde.
* '''3 May''' - Chris receives [[Clyde E-mails#Panda — May 3, 2010|an email]] from [[PandaHalo]] with information on how he can prevent the trolls from [[PS3/How the PS3 is Hacked|hacking into his PS3]].
* '''5 May'''
** Upon realizing he was duped, Chris [[List of Chris's edits to the CWCki|edits]] the [[CWCki]] under a pseudonym to say that the "bug" on his [[PS3]] was just a Wi-Fi antenna, thus marking the debut of [[JenkinsJinkies]].
** Chris [[I Pimp My Ride.MOV|uploads a new video]], in which he reveals he removed the Wi-Fi antenna from his PS3, then shows off his "pimped out" PS3 Keyboard.
* '''8 May'''
** Chris makes minor [[List of Chris's edits to the CWCki|edits]] on the [[CWCki]] regarding his [[video games]] and his [[duck]].
** Chris attends an extreme action sports show at the John Paul Jones Arena in Charlottesville with one of four tickets he won on the radio. Unfortunately for him, he was unable to find other people to come along with him, so he goes alone. He gets very depressed, not helped by the affectionate couple he was sitting near.
** In utter misery, Chris [[Greene County Conspiracy|uploads a new video]] in which he discusses how the [[Greene County]] School Board has ruined his life.
* '''9 May''' - [[Clyde Cash]] leaks a zip file of revisions to Chris's current [[OkCupid]] profile directly to the [[CWCki]].
* '''13 May''' - A mysterious individual going by the name DariaCamacho is given sysop power on the CWCipedia. Declaring herself a "Fan-Manager", she writes short articles for some of Sonichu's Minor Characters, and updates the main page. None of these changes are especially insulting or threatening.
* '''14 May'''
** Chris reverts DariaCamacho's changes without comment.
** "DariaCamacho" makes several changes to the front page of the CWCipedia, moving templates and adding a new greeting to Sonichu fans from herself. Again, none of these changes are threatening.
** Chris reverts DariaCamacho's changes to the front page, again without comment. DariaCamacho sends Chris a discussion message, politely asking why he undid her edits and stating she only wanted to make the front page more presentable, while making it easier to find the most up to date information on Chris and the Sonichu Universe. She also states the massive cwciwiki logo is far too big, and makes some cosmetic changes to character bios page.
* '''15 May'''
** Chris posts [[05142010|a new video]] where he uses the death of a [[University of Virginia|UVA]] student in an attempt to garner pity. He also states he's now paranoid of girls.
** DariaCamacho attempts to make changes to the CWCipedia Main Page, which Chris later reverts. Meanwhile, the garish site background returns.
* '''16 May'''
** A [[Autism Awareness E-mails|leaked series of e-mails]] from an alleged [[autism]] awareness volunteer chronicles her doomed attempts to talk some sense into Chris.
** Another [[Regina e-mails|series of e-mails]] is leaked, in which Chris hits on an innocent woman just trying to buy his ''[[Guitar Hero]]'' guitars off [[eBay]].
** Chris reverts Dariacamacho's changes again to the CWCipedia, and responds angrily to her question on her discussion page, and as always blaming his [[autism]] for [[My Little Pony|acting]] [[Chris Loses It|like]] [[CWCFlyingElephants|a]] [[Ivy|manchild]].
* '''17 May''' - DariaCamacho makes more changes to the CWCipedia, this time adding one line of text to blank pages for some of Chris's high school crushes.
* '''18 May''' - DariaCamacho adds in more to [[Sarah Hammer]]'s entry, then starts entries to the PS3, [[Metal Sonichu]] and [[Bionic]].
* '''20 May'''
** Chris talks about his [[Some Favored Comedians|favorite comedians]] for an excruciating ten minutes, but mentions that [[Bob]] is still alive.
** DariaCamacho adds a bio page for [[Clawdorf]].
* '''21 May''' - DariaCamacho proposes that Chris explain his regular daily schedule for his fans, breaking down how much time he spends sleeping and playing PS3.
* '''26 May'''
** Chris [[CWC Blog#26 May 2010|begs for ''ModNation Racers'' mods]].
** The [[CWCipedia]] gets hacked and vandalized once again.
* '''27 May''' - Chris uploads a [[100_2188|new video]] and announces he's abandoning the [[CWCipedia]].
* '''29 May''' - The vandalism comes to a halt as parodic commentary is added to the Sonichu comics.
* '''30 May''' - [[Hamsty the Hamster]] takes over CWCipedia from Mao; ''Sonichu Season 2'' begins.
* '''31 May''' - Chris uploads another [[100 2189|new video]], four days after claiming he was leaving the internet for the third time.

==Activity==
===Audio===
* [[Sydney Kirsch#OH SHI-|Final Sydney call]]

===Chats===
* [[Clyde E-mails#Panda — May 3, 2010|Clyde E-mails]]

===Posts===
* [[List of Chris's edits to the CWCki#JenkinsJinkies|JenkinsJinkies wiki edits]]
* [[OkCupid#Second version|OkCupid profile]]
* [[CWC_Blog#26 May 2010|Mystery Mods blog]]

===Videos===
* [[I Pimp My Ride.MOV]]
* [[Greene County Conspiracy]]
* [[05142010]]
* [[Some Favored Comedians]]
* [[100 2188]]
* [[100 2189]]

{{Timeline}}

October 2015

2026-05-16T00:36:09Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

[[File:Cwcoct15.png|thumb|Chris in October 2015]]
'''October''' was the 10th month of '''[[2015]]'''. It marked the first court date for the [[26 December 2014]] incident since [[July 2015]]. Those who expected another continuance were left surprised when this turned out to be the real deal; Chris was found guilty, and was let off with a fine of $541 and a suspended sentence of 180 days. Local [[Kiwi Farms|Kiwi Farmers]] also reported that Chris's ban from the [[Fashion Square Mall]] was lifted (except for the bans put into effect by individual businesses at the mall, so Chris was still banned from the local [[GameStop]]). Aside from all of that, Chris also made several Facebook posts about his custom-made [[Amiibo]], uploaded several [[Super Smash Bros. Videos|videos about Super Smash Bros.]], uploaded [[Apology for past homophobic comments and homophobia.|a video]] apologizing for his past [[Homos|homophobia]], and ended his [[Sonic Boom Protests|blue arm protests]] this month.

==Events==
* '''1 October''' - [[Barb]] celebrates her 74th birthday.
* '''2 October'''
** Chris claims victory in the [[FIX SONIC'S ARMS IMMEDIATELY, SEGA!!!|blue arms]] [[Sonic Boom Protests|debacle]], due to [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] being his non-blue-armed form in ''[[Nintendo|Mario]] & Sonic at the Rio 2016 Olympic Games''. He says this is the final update for the group.
** Chris makes [[October 2015 Facebook Posts#Amiibo For Sale|a Facebook post]] on an [[Amiibo]] trading & collecting page.
* '''3 October''' - Chris announces that he plans on selling [[Sonichu Amiibo|Amiibo]] based on his personification of [[autism]].
* '''4 October'''
** [[October 2015 Facebook Posts#Bann Has Happened|Due to making hostile comments]], Chris [[List of places that have banned Chris|gets banned]] from the Amiibo trading Facebook page.
** Chris comments on a new photo posted by his friend [[William Elliott Waterman]].
* '''6 October'''
** Chris completes a [[Commissions|commission]] of vocaloid [[Wikipedia:Kagamine Rin/Len|Len Kagamine]].
** ''[[Rock Band]] 4'' is released.
* '''8 October''' - A full list of Sonichu Amiibo is published on Facebook, as well a statement claiming that these may be the last ever produced.
* '''9 October'''
** [[Slaweel Ryam]], [[Count Graduon]], and [[Jerkop]] grunts are confirmed to be immortalized in Amiibo form.
** Chris [[October 2015 Facebook Posts#Chris Gets Spooked|explains on Facebook]] that a [[fan]] had shouted at him from a passing car, forcing him to give him the flippy finger and gain mental [[stress]].
* '''13 October''' - Chris uploads [[Super Smash Bros. Videos|five videos]] of himself playing ''[[Nintendo|Super Smash Bros.]]'' for [[Wii]] U, showcasing his custom Miis.
* '''15 October'''
** Chris's sixth court date. He winds up guilty for the [[26 December 2014|GameStop incident]], is fined $541, and gets a 180-day probation.
** Chris references his new Super Smash Bros. videos on Facebook.
* '''16 October'''
** Chris reveals his prototype [[autism]] Amiibo to Facebook.
** A live-action adaption of ''[[R.L. Stine|Goosebumps]]'' is released to surprisingly positive reviews.
* '''17 October'''
** Chris shows off an alternate version of his [[Angelica Rosechu|Angelica]] Amiibo.
** Chris uploads [[Super Smash Bros. Videos|two more Super Smash Bros. Videos]].
* '''18 October'''
** Chris shows off a special edition 50th Sonichu Amiibo.
** Chris announces a [[contest]] to guess the name of [[Robotnik]]'s replacement character in [[Sonichu 1]].
* '''19 October''' - Chris makes several "updates" to his [[Etsy]] site.
* '''20 October'''
** The revised version of Sonichu 1 is uploaded, replacing Dr. Robotnik with [[Ren Skysoar]].
** ''[[Guitar Hero]] Live'' is released.
* '''23 October''' - Chris [[October 2015 Facebook Posts#Oh Boy, More Pages!|teases his fans on Facebook]] with the promise of new pages of [[Sonichu 11]].
* '''25 October''' - "[[Thank You from Christine Chandler]]" is uploaded to Youtube, a video in which Chris offers a thank you to those who had purchased his Amiibos.
* '''26 October'''
** Chris [[October 2015 Facebook Posts#You're Quite Welcome|links to his new video on Facebook]] and redoubles his thanks.
** Sixteen new pages of ''[[Sonichu 11]]'' are published.
** Chris presents prototype [[Amiibo]] of [[Simonla]] and [[Silvana]].
** Chris releases two more [[Super Smash Bros. Videos]], with these featuring him actually playing the game.
* '''28 October''' - Chris decides to add [[Sonichu 1#2015 Revisions|two new pages]] to ''[[Sonichu 1]]''.
* '''29 October''' - "[[Apology for past homophobic comments and homophobia.]]" is uploaded to YouTube. Chris apologizes for his [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There|past comments]] about [[Homos|homosexuals]].
* '''30 October'''
** Chris makes a [[List of Chris's comments on YouTube#Ultimate Smash Bros. Theory: Smash is Autistic | Gnoggin|comment on a YouTube video]] regarding Super Smash Bros.
** On Facebook, Chris makes [[October 2015 Facebook Posts#Ironic Autism|a post]] pointing out the irony of his making an [[Amiibo]] figure representing [[autism]] for an autistic game.
* '''31 October'''
** Old photos of Chris and his [[Clover and Snoopy|dogs]] are leaked on the [[Kiwi Farms|forums]].
** [[Halloween]]. Chris [[October 2015 Facebook Posts#Sonichu Finally Goes Trans|releases two drawings on Facebook]] of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] and his family dressed for the holiday.

==Posts from this month==
'''Facebook'''
*[[October 2015 Facebook Posts]]

==Videos from this month==
*[[Super Smash Bros. Videos#CWC Mii Showcase|CWC Mii Showcase]]
*[[Super Smash Bros. Videos#Jerkops and Janekops|Jerkops and Janekops]]
*[[Super Smash Bros. Videos#CWC vs Autism|CWC vs Autism]]
*[[Super Smash Bros. Videos#Slaweel Vs Count Graduon|Slaweel Vs Count Graduon]]
*[[Super Smash Bros. Videos#Slaweel Ryam|Slaweel Ryam]]
*[[Super Smash Bros. Videos#Autism Takeover|Autism Takeover]]
*[[Super Smash Bros. Videos#CWCs Vs Autism Round 2|CWCs Vs Autism Round 2]]
*[[Thank You from Christine Chandler]]
*[[Super Smash Bros. Videos#I Vs the foes|I Vs the foes]]
*[[Super Smash Bros. Videos#I Vs a horde|I Vs a horde]]
*[[Apology for past homophobic comments and homophobia.]]

{{Timeline}}

Trolls

2026-05-15T21:30:57Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

:''This article is about troll personas. For how trolls manipulated Chris, see [[Chris and manipulation]].''

{{Protip|We strongly recommend that you do not [[Weens|try to troll Chris]]. Doing so risks you getting targeted and potentially doxed.}}
{{Misinfo|Any insistence from the Classic Era trolls, such as the Miscreants, that they were trying to "help" Chris, is mostly tongue-in-cheek. Like with any other Internet troll, their primary goal was to get a rise out of Chris.|includegossip = yes}}

{{quote|That which can condemn the abnormally foolish is not the abnormally clever... That which can condemn the abnormally foolish is the normally foolish.|GK Chesterton}}
{{quote|...[T]hey are [[Chris and anger|vicious]], [[Chris and reality|crazy]], [[Slow-in-the-minds|wickedly smart]] people.|[[Chris]] on trolls.<ref>[[Tomboys_And_Tomgirls_of_Virginia#Friendship_Issues|Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia]]</ref>}}
{{quote|What a world we live in, with such trolls in it.|[[Bubbles Rosechu|Bubbles]], [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].}}

'''Trolls''' are various individuals of all races, colors, and creeds united under a common goal - to mess with the life of, and extract as many lulz from the [[Chris and the Internet|Internet]]'s most beloved and most hated [[autism|autistic]] manchild, [[Chris Chan]], as possible. The organized effort to troll Chris began in earnest in 2007, and still has momentum going for it, even if it peaked after disbanding of the Classic-era trolls following the death of Chris's [[father]] in 2011.

Trolling schemes by these individuals have ranged from [[Manipulation|manipulating]] Chris into a ''Truman Show''-like existence, making him [[:Category:Videos with RAGE|rage on video]], making him take [[Nudes|pictures of himself unclothed]], accelerating the breaking of his sense of [[reality]], and more.

==Pre-ED==
It is notable that Chris was bullied in real life before his discovery by [[4-cent garbage.com|4chan]] and [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|ED]]. It can be argued that the first known torment of Chris occurred when his lifelong-friend-who-no-longer-speaks-to-him, [[Sarah Nicole Hammer]], [[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares#Memories of childhood|locked him under the house]] when they were children. The next notable bullying occurred during the infamous mini-date with [[Hanna]] in [[2005]] which smashed his [[heart level]] to 15%. Around the same time, he was also trolled by a girl he contacted through [[MySpace]] named [[MySpace messages#Lindsay|Lindsay Kaye]]. There was also possible trolling of Chris through the guestbook on his website from as early as [[2003]], when "a hot redhead" said that she would meet him outside of [[PVCC]] (either this was epic trolling, or Chris put it on the guestbook himself). And let's not forget about [[Mary Lee Walsh]] and [[The GAMe PLACe]] hijinks.

But this was all child's play compared to what happened next....

==The Miscreants==
{{quote|Y'all are making me very nervous right now.|Chris on The Miscreants.<ref>[[Mumble 9]]</ref>}}

[[Image:REALChrisChanAndFriends.jpg|thumb|left|The Miscreants at their annual Ancient and Secret convention.]]
[[File:MiscreantsJury.png|thumb|left|The Miscreants on jury duty for Chris's [[Affair with Mother|misdeeds]].]]
[[Image:TapestryPickleMan.jpg|thumb|The Miscreants was an ancient order dating over a thousand years. In this lost scene from the Bayeux Tapestry, Christian's ancestor Geoffrey Weston the Feeble-Minded notes that he has been fooled by the "Man donning the Pickled Cucumber Suit."]]

'''The Miscreants''' were a group of people who trolled Chris from 2009 up until his father's death in 2011. [[Clyde Cash]] was the original leader of The Miscreants, which was styled after The Patriots, the shadowy cabal from the ''[[Metal Gear]]'' series who are revealed to be behind a conspiracy spanning decades, including all of the main incidents the protagonists go through. They claimed to be responsible for several unfortunate events in Chris's past, [[Chris and reality|which Chris seemingly believed]].

On 23 [[February 2009]], The Miscreants approached Chris in [[Mumble]] and informed him of their plan. Several [[Secret Weapon|"HA-HA, I got you!"]] videos were made, all with false information. To deal with these Internet bullies Chris resorted to [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 23rd, 2009|babbling incoherently]].

After the disappearance of Clyde Cash, the site<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20090323102050/http://themiscreants.110mb.com/ The Miscreants Website]</ref> was down for a few weeks, with the message that "Clyde's dead, baby." After that, the website returned, apparently re-uploaded by Vivian Gee. Part of the site description read "Name's Vivian. Guess I'm the new leader or some shit. Fuck y'all." On 28 [[June 2009]], the Miscreants set up shop at the [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens]] message board.

While online wars have been waged, [[Man in the Pickle Suit|Men in Pickle Suits]] have also been deployed to ruin Chris in reality. These exploits have included stealing his [[Emily|date]], obtaining potentially life-ruining material, and generally being lulzy. They also seemed to treat Chris's father [[Bob Chandler]] as one of their own.

While the group's explicit purpose, [[Mumble 9|according to Cash]], was to ensure that [[Chris and sex|Chris never got laid]] and forever remain a [[virgin with rage]], that didn't stop them from [[Hooker incident|sending a bunch of prostitutes to]] [[14 Branchland Court|Chris's house]]. Nonetheless, Chris got the last laugh when [[Mia Hamm|he hired a prostitute]].

Since the death of Bob, the Miscreants have effectively disbanded, with pretty much everyone involved distancing themselves from Chris, and only a few (such as [[Surfshack Tito]]) continuing their efforts before eventually losing interest. Years after the fact, some have admitted that they took things too far when reflecting on this era of Christory, while others look back with a sense of smug satisfaction.

[[File:AdamStackhouse.jpg|left|80px|thumb|Adam Stackhouse]]

===[[Adam Stackhouse]]===

In [[2007]] Chris would enter the ''[[PaRappa the Rapper]]'' contest [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown]], in an attempt to win over [[Megan Schroeder|Megan]]'s heart. [[Adam Stackhouse]] would win instead, due to his video being superior. This would prompt a [[Chris and anger|tard rage]], in which he created a fake webpage proclaiming himself the winner<ref>http://web.archive.org/web/20071108233910/http://members.aol.com/CWCSonichu/EPPromotions283.html</ref>, as well as [[CWC is Angry|a creepy video]] in which he shoots a photo of Adam and his sister with his [[Megatron Pistol]] in silence and exclaims his anger at the end.

[[File:ABL.png|left|80px|thumb|Alec Benson Leary]]

===[[Alec Benson Leary]]===
Creator of ''[[Asperchu]]'', a webcomic that was specifically designed to piss Chris off. This started a long war between ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' and the aforementioned Asperchu in which Alec and the [[Asperpedia Four]] caused the death of [[Simonla Rosechu]], placed ads for the [[Asperpedia]] on the [[CWCipedia]], and eventually took control of the CWCipedia and took it down. Alec and Chris exchanged a series of [[Alec Benson Leary calls|nine calls]] over the course of the war. Alec has also been responsible for other trollsome personas, including [[Lars]] and [[Jackie]].

[[Image:SirWilliamMaysOBE.jpg|left|80px|thumb|BILLY MAYS]]

===[[BILLY MAYS]]===
The infamous loud-mouthed salesman of the same name who types in ALL CAPS. He was declared the mayor of [[CWCville]] by Chris on 3 March 2009 while under pressure from [[BlueSpike#Max|Max]]. It was widely rumored that Chris himself had something to do with his untimely death.

===[[Blanca Weiss]]===
[[Image:Blanka.jpg|80px|thumb|Blanca's true identity.]]

"Blanca" was really a trio of trolls (RickyRicardo123, Ickeriss69, and Nurse Icky-chan) who tricked Chris into sending them nudes, and later his [[Medallions of Fail|Sonichu medallion]]. Ickeriss later uploaded a couple of [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k3Jr2ZktVfI videos] featuring the Sonichu medallion, including a video in which the medallion is destroyed.

Not to be confused with [[Trolls#Lordsillynipples|LordSillyNipples]], who used the Blanca identity to score the first nudes.

===[[BlueSpike]]===
[[Image:Bluespikeohexploitable.png|thumb|left|80px|Bluespike's identity is unknown.]]

BlueSpike (AKA "LeonSpike", aka "Julie", aka "Max") is a [[Pedofork|thirteen-year-old boy]] who pretended to be Chris's [[sweetheart]], "[[Julie]]". He later revealed himself as a troll in a now infamous [[Julie Reveals Herself|hour-long phone call]], in which he berates Chris, and forces him to cut up his [[Sonichu medallion]] and shove it up his ass.

[[Image:BryanBash.jpg|thumb|left|80px|Bryan Bash (right) with your sister (left).]]

===[[Bryan Bash]]===
Bryan Bash is a close friend of [[Clyde Cash]]. He is the one who [[Hooker incident|sent hookers over to Chris's house]], as well as the person who called during the infamous "[[Bob Walks In]]" audio file, and is responsible for leaking [[CWCRockin4Way.jpg]]. Additionally, he leaked the [[Father Call]] and the [[Kacey and Liquid Call]] to [[/cwc/]] on 11 November [[2009]], and he has also leaked conversations between [[Chris]] and [[Jack Thaddeus]].

===[[Clyde Cash]]===

[[image:TheRealClydeCash.jpg|thumb|80px|right|Clyde Cash. The man. The legend. The guido.]]

The nefarious [[Clyde Cash]] is the most infamous and legendary of trolls. A vile and reprehensible fellow whose very name strikes fear and revulsion into Chris's clogged heart and inspires admiration from the souls of the people. He posed as [[Shigeru Miyamoto]], raped Chris's beloved [[PandaHalo]], and performed many more amazing feats about which songs shall be written and the minstrels shall sing of in the ages immemorial. Unfortunately it will not come to pass since Clyde is serving a life sentence for stealing the identity of Lee Hotti.

===[[Emily]]===

A brave soul who went on a date with Chris. She was later saved by the [[Man in the Pickle Suit|Jew in the Pickle Suit]]. She was played by [[LoveYouLongTime]], who also portrayed [[Kim Wilson]] and various other real-life gal-pals; Chris [[Facial blindness|failed to recognize her face]] in all of these instances.

===[[Evan Christopher George]]===
Evan was a troll who sent "fanart" to Chris through e-mail, which lead to an ongoing back and forth between them. He is also the creator of the ''Simonchu'' parody webcomic and later participated in the ''Asperchu'' trolling saga.

[[File:Ahuvia.png|thumb|left|80px|Jack Thaddeus]]

===[[Jack Thaddeus]]===
The possible successor (and gay lover) of Clyde Cash and is responsible for various [[PS3#PlayStation Network|PSN]]-related trollings and also for the [[CWCipedia]] ads.

[[File:Jimmuh hill.jpg|thumb|80px|Jimmy Hill]]

===[[Jimmy Hill]]===
A British sportscaster. He claimed to be the true original creator of Sonichu, the first openly gay cartoon character which briefly became very popular in Europe in 2009.

===[[Jason Kendrick Howell]]===
The original creator of the [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|ED]] page.

===[[The Man in the Pickle Suit]] ===
A real-life pickleman who answers to Clyde Cash. He saved Emily from the clutches of Chris.

[[Image:CChanSonichuCWC.jpg|thumb|left|80px|The [[TRUE and HONEST]] Chris]]

===[[Liquid Chris]]===
A [[YouTube]] troll who is known for doing a spot-on impersonation of Chris-chan. Within his saga, Liquid Chris is referred to as the [[TRUE and HONEST]] Chris-chan and creator of the popular comic character Sonichu, and Solid is referred to as an angry troll named [[Ian Brandon Anderson]], who made outlandish claims that he was the real Chris.

===[[Lordsillynipples]]===
A troll from [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|ED]] who was responsible for impersonating [[Blanca Weiss|Blanca]] and being the first to obtain the now [[Nudes|infamous Chris-chan noodz]] on 11 September 2008, along with [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|Chris's DVD]]. She is also responsible for giving birth to the [[Man in the Pickle Suit]] and for feeding Chris the infamous guido picture of [[Clyde Cash|Clyde]].

===[[Robert Simmons V]]===
A YouTube "anti-troll" who managed to gain Chris's trust by showing him support and mirroring his life. Along with [[Church Visit|visiting Chris's church]] and meeting [[Bob Chandler|Bob]], he also had a hand in organizing the [[Date with Emily]].

[[image:Tito 300.gif|thumb|80px|Surfshack Tito]]

===[[Shigeru Miyamoto]]===
Shigeru Miyamoto (Japanese: 宮本茂) is the creator of some of Nintendo's most legendary video game franchises such as ''Super Mario'', ''The Legend of Zelda'', and ''Star Fox''. He pretended to be interested in his [[sonichu|yellow Sonic abortion]]. It would later come to light that Miyamoto was a sockpuppet of Clyde.

===[[Surfshack Tito (troll)|Surfshack Tito]]===

An enigmatic troll who managed to invoke Chris's wrath on [[Surfshack Tito|two]] [[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!|separate]] occasions by hacking his PSN and taking the blame for ruining Chris's slim chances with [[The Wallflower]]. He was also involved in [[The MovingForward videos|the destruction]] of Chris's beloved [[PS3]].

[[image:TH.PNG|thumb|80px|left|Thorg]]
[[image:Vivian.jpg|thumb|80px|Vivian]]

===[[Thorg]]===
A troll responsible for creating a [[20 December 2009|slanderous billboard]] in 2009 and exposing [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia]] in 2011. A major part of Chris's 2011 [[Calling Out|blackmail campaign]].

===[[Vivian Gee]]===
The creator of the ''Sonichu'' [[audiobooks]] and various other Chris-related videos and cousin of Clyde Cash. A former white knight who turned troll after she realized Chris was a [[Vivian Gee E-mails|hopeless, thick-skulled moron]]. She and Clyde Cash were both personas created by the same troll.

==Renaissance Trolls==
Following Bob's death in 2011, the then-current group of trolls disbanded to give Chris room to grieve. In the years that followed, new trolls would eventually crop up.

===[[Thetan]]===
Impersonated Chris's former high school classmates and various other people.<ref>[[Kiwi Farms posts (Marvin)#Thetan Saga]]</ref>

===[[Catherine]] and friends===
Catherine is a fake love interest who conspired with [[Marvin]] by manipulating [[OKCupid]] results to match with Chris's.<ref>[[Kiwi Farms posts (Marvin)#Manipulation of Chris During Catherine Saga]]</ref> She used this influence for another sweetheart saga which included meeting him in real life to surreptitiously record his conversations.

Accompanying her is a group of others that would interact with Chris, such as [[Cousin Al]] who met him IRL and found the [[Manchester High Leaks]], [[Colin]], who was a member of their open relationship, [[Shaina]], [[Renee]] and [[Rebeckah Bentley E-mails|Rebeckah]] who would e-mail Chris frequently.

===[[Jeff/Francine]]===
The mysterious creator of [[CWC Adult Chronicles]]. Targeted by Chris for selling unofficial Sonichu merchandise and in a blatant act of [[Chris and hypocrisy|hypocrisy]], was made fun of for her transition.

===[[Johan]]===
An ex-gay porn star who challenged Chris for the rights to impregnate [[Sam and Ellen|two lesbians]]. After a sex-off, Johan's superior body and non-bent duck won them over.

===[[Jessica Quinn]]===
A former white knight who played the long con by becoming his sweetheart. Known for her fat fetishism before ditching him and coming back and forth to toy with him.

==Fantasy Enablers==
Beginning in October 2017, the [[Idea Guys]] exploited Chris's fantasy [[coping]] mechanisms to gain power over him. Since then, numerous [[enablers]] have used similar methods.

===[[Idea Guys]]===
A group of trolls whose actions rivaled and arguably surpassed those of BlueSpike. They remain infamous for how they manipulated and brainwashed Chris over a period of several months, coercing him into performing degrading acts and extorting him out of thousands. The Idea Guys hastily vanished after the emergence of the [[Guard Dogs]], who set about attempting to reverse all the Idea Guys had wrought. Nonetheless, Chris maintains many of their influences in the current day, chief among them the beliefs that he's a [[CPU Blue Heart|CPU goddess]], the [[Dimensional Merge]], and his imaginary [[polyamorous marriage]].

===[[Teen Troon Squad]]===
A group of transgender teenagers who posed as his friends. They took advantage of Chris's faltering sense of reality by feeding him information on the [[Dimensional Merge]] and taking over his Twitter account. Rumored to have given Chris marijuana.

===[[Jacob Sockness]]===
A mysterious man from San Francisco, California, who aimed to manipulate Chris into a relationship. He had primarily served to only further enable the beliefs planted in Chris's head by the [[Idea Guys]], as well as bolster Chris's beliefs in the [[Dimensional Merge]]. After Sockness stated that he was taking a train across the country to meet with Chris in person, Chris insisted that Sockness stop after realizing Sockness was a legitimate danger. While Sockness relented and went back to California, he still ended up continuing to try and force his way back into Chris's life on repeated occasions, only to be aggressively rejected by Chris in late November 2019. Despite this, Sockness made several more attempts at returning. Eventually being repeatedly chastised by Chris on [[Twitter]] in [[July 2020]], and finally being permanently blocked by Chris by the end of [[August 2020]].

===[[Ben Saint]]===
A webcomic artist who expressed an interest in Chris two years prior. Ben entered into a squabble with Chris after getting him and [[Night Star]] involved in his latest comic series promoting his latest project, ''Endless War''. The interaction would then lead to a battle over the canonicity over the events of the comic, with the two sides providing [[Sonichu Special 7|contradictory narratives]].

===[[Larry Vaughn]]===
A troll who attempted to somewhat follow in the footsteps of the Idea Guys. His grandiose plans of using [[Magi-Chan]] as a hostage to make Chris drive to Disney World were stopped before they could begin, but Vaughn did manage to have Chris send bizarre Twitter DMs to various individuals.

==Modern Trolls==

===[[KwaiiSandbag]] and [[Lily]]===
Two trolls who posed as psychics to influence Chris. They managed to snap him out of the delusion that he was body-swapped with Sonichu.

==[[Sonichu_(character)|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]]==
While there's no definitive proof of these two being trolls, they have been known to dispense advice for Chris from time to time, especially on the subject of relationships.<ref name="Jackie e 16">[[Jackie_E-mails_16]]</ref> Considering the [["Damian Antaria", PLEASE, Don't Leave Me - I NEED YOU!!!|results derived from said advice]], one cannot help but wonder about their true motivations.

==Devil Trolls==
[[File:ModNation TrollFemale.jpg|thumb|left|150px|Featured in ''[[ModNation Racers]]''.]]

[[Image:DevilTroll.jpg|thumb|200px|Artist's depiction.]]

Aside from the several notable figures above, the '''Devil Trolls''' are mysterious, evil creatures that appear in Chris's ''[[Sonichu]]'' comic series. These creatures are first mentioned in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]] and make their first full appearance in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]].

[[File:Devil_troll_artistic_interpretation.png|thumb|right|150px|Artistic recreation.]]

Like many beings within Chris's comics, the Devil Trolls are inspired by his encounters in real life. Devil Trolls represent the various trolls that have given him such [[Chris and stress|stress]] over his lifetime. This is shown when Chris encounters a set of them attacking a room containing his stuff from one of his earlier websites.

The Devil Trolls make their first mentioned appearance as some sort of grass protrusions taking away the fallen "[[IBAChandler]]" after Sonichu defeats him in ''Sonichu'' #9. They make their full appearance in ''Sonichu'' #10, as [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]] encounters them inside a room containing his pictures from his various websites. Seeing as Chris can't create anything without [[Things Chris has ripped off|ripping off original designs]], Devil Trolls resemble [[Wikipedia:Troll doll|those old Troll toys]], minus their gems, with long tails and demon-like wings. They also sport sharp teeth.

==Motivations==
===Chris's perspective===
Chris himself has a very simplistic view of what motivates his enemies. When a [[Mailbag]] correspondent asked him to explain why he's trolled, and why so many people seem to hate him, Chris had this ingenious response:

{{quote|"[[Chris and English|Tehy're]] just jealous that they did not think of [[Sonichu]] first, or that I am more [[Chris and art|Artistically Talented]] than they are."|[[Chris]], [[Mailbag 5|Mailbag #5]]}}

[[File:Trollll.PNG|thumb|Drawing of a troll appearing in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].]]

This is consistent with the advice given to many children who are harassed in real life: that bullies are merely jealous of you, and want to see you react unfavorably, when in reality, bullies abuse others for many different motives, jealousy being only one of them. Furthermore, internet trolls typically do what they do for their own amusement, and not always out of some personal slight against their target. Since Chris [[Count Graduon|never moved past]] [[Manchester High School|high school]] mentally, he still believes he is hated because [[Chris and his ego|he is so much better than everyone else.]] [[File:Trollmiia.png|200px|thumb|artistic recreation @miiashapphire]]

From his own attempts to illustrate trolling, it's obvious that Chris has no concept of how it works. When he tried his hand at impersonation, he thought that we'd all be trolled if he [[Rollin' and Trollin'|pretended to be an epic troll]], but then [[Jack Thaddeus|a troll]] saw through his lie and forced him to [[CWC Trollin More|drop the ruse]] on pain of having his [[tugboat]] taken away. Chris believes that trolling has two steps: pretend to be someone you're not and then "troll" someone by revealing who you really are. [[Silvana]], a character based on his perception of forum trolls who claim to be people they aren't, thinks it's hilarious to pretend to be [[Meg Griffin]], kiss Chris, and then transform once she's out of sight. As a result, Chris walks away happy, unaware that he just kissed a tranny, defeating the entire point of "trolling" him.

A tool he has used to fight against his hated trolls is claiming that they are all homosexuals, combining his two major hates into one massive force of nature. The earliest this is seen is [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Mailbag&oldid=3208|a message he wrote] in his Mailbag section, exploding in rage over an added [[Twitter]] and how they could talk about him behind his back. Even more, in his [[Damien Antaria (CWCipedia Page)|CWCipedia article on The Wallflower]], Chris has also decided that the trolls are also [[Chris and Race#Black_people|black]].

Unsurprisingly, [[Chris and the law|Chris also considers trolling a ''crime'']], and has somehow dedicated himself to stop trolling. However, Chris's views on trolling are very very skewed, as he believes that ''all'' trolling is equal to what he had done to him. In [[EXCLUSIVE Manchester High School 2000 Reunion Required NOW]], he told people how to act on the Internet [[Chris and hypocrisy|mere moments after revealing his real name, address, and phone number]].

As the years passed, Chris's take on trolls has erupted into a massive flight of fancy. Because he has been refused admittance to [[The GAMe PLACe]], Chris has proclaimed that the entire store is a massive front for Internet trolling, with [[Michael Snyder]] as the ringleader of it all. He also sees the [[CWCki Forums]], [[Kiwi Farms]] and [[Reddit]] as a major gathering place for trolls.

===His parents' perspective===
The [[Matthew Noble call]] in August 2010 revealed some interesting insights into Bob and Barbara Chandler's interpretation of what has happened to their son over the years. Chris's parents are apparently convinced that the entire Chris-chan Trolldom grew out of a conspiracy by Michael Snyder, two alleged homosexuals who frequented The GAMe PLACe (possibly [[Lucas]] and [[Mimms]]), and ''[[Megan Schroeder]]'', who worked to get Chris banned from the store and are involved with a general effort to harass and torment Chris. When speaking with Ivy, Bob described Megan with words like "cruel" and "German". Bob was convinced that it is all because they are persecuting Chris for being autistic, while in reality he was scaring away customers with his behavior and sexually harassing Megan.

It's useful to try to consider things from his parents' point of view. To begin with, there ''is'' a worldwide conspiracy, more or less, to pester the Chandlers, violate their privacy, drive their son to do ridiculous things, and otherwise fuck with them in a myriad of ways. Bob and Barbara are bombarded by prank phone calls all day, nude photos, God knows what else arrive in their mail, signs mysteriously appearing on their lawn, Chris having [[Kacey and Liquid Call|angry screaming matches]] with people they've never met on the telephone, Chris once [[Ohio trip|drove off to Ohio]] to meet [[Julie|a woman who didn't exist]], and so on.

Being Chris's parents must be a fairly surreal experience at this point, and given that they belong to a much older generation, they can hardly be expected to develop the grasp of Internet social phenomena that they'd need to properly understand their situation. The GAMe PLACe, however small a piece of the bigger picture it may be, is the most significant real, physical element of Chris's adventures in trolldom that they've been exposed to. As ridiculous as their theory may seem, it's probably the best they can do as far as making sense of what has happened and continues to happen to them.

==Chris the troll==
While the idea of everyone's favorite manchild becoming the one thing he hates seems kind of farfetched, if not laughably ironic, it actually isn't too far off as one might think. Because of his horrendous misconceptions of what he thinks his trolls does, Chris believes that, if given a new target, Chris's trolls would gladly stop attacking him and go after that new target. In the past, Chris has tried to deflect his trolls towards people like [[Joshua Martinez]], [[Michael Snyder]] and even [[Daniel Mimms|Mimms]]. However, Chris has been so entrenched with his trolls and viewers that the idea of going after someone else doesn't seem feasible anymore.

As well, Chris has even attempted to troll his own trolls. One of the first known attempts was the [[Rollin' and Trollin']] video, claiming that he had pulled the most epic prank on the Internet, only to turn around the very next day and reveal that it was a lie. [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], as mentioned above, had his comic book self thinking he had kissed [[Meg Griffin]], not knowing that it was actually [[Silvana]]. As well, on 28 [[April 2012]], he attempted to convince his trolls that he had decided to return to the mall and resume his [[Love Quest]], armed with his [[Attraction Sign]]. Again, he revealed the next day that it was a lie and that he had gotten [[ban]]ned from the mall just before he decided to pull it.

Interestingly, Chris's perception of being a troll is less about trolling to get a rise out of someone and more of attempting to pull a prank. His "return" to the Love Quest is probably the biggest indicator of that. Chris let his trolls know through his [[Facebook]], then waited a day before shouting "SURPRISE!". As well, he also believed that if someone reads his message, he's going to assume that everyone has and that they are going to descend on the mall like a bad flash mob just to find Chris. Too bad everyone, unlike Chris, has lives of their own.

However, if there is one person that Chris himself has successfully trolled, without a shadow of a doubt, it's ''himself''. Proof of this can be directly pointed to his [[Ego#Surrendering Information|bad habit of surrendering information]] about himself, no matter how [[Tomgirl|embarrassing]], [[Nudes|demeaning]], or [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|downright]] [[Dox|stupid]] giving out said tidbits of himself would be. Chris often screams at his trolls for not leaving him alone, but, aside from the fact that his antics only add more fuel to the fire, he always fails to realise that if he didn't give them ammo to begin with, he wouldn't have ended up in this predicament.

It just goes to show you, nobody trolls Chris better than Chris. Chris is the type to not only shoot himself in the foot, but reload, fire again, and repeat the cycle while blaming the trolls. He just never learns.

==Chris's relationship with the trolls==
Although he would never admit it, Chris eventually developed something of a love-hate relationship with the trolls, which became clear during the Liquid Saga. When Clyde trolled Liquid Chris in a phone call, Chris attempted to redirect Clyde to himself, angered by Liquid's slanderous attempt at stealing his trolls. In an E-mail to Vivian, Chris also [[Vivian Gee E-mails, 2009#4 August|thanked the trolls]] for documenting [[Honest Content|the information he revealed to them]] and [[Lie|allowing him to mature emotionally]]. Although the trolls were a nuisance to Chris, their antics were far more thrilling than Chris's hopelessly shitty yet mundane lifestyle, which left him unfulfilled and [[Persecution complex|desperate for adversity]]. The trolls served as black-and-white antagonists for Chris, giving him a perceived purpose in life and allowing him to live out his [[Sonichu (comic)|fantasies]] as [[Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)|a hero]] [[Jerkops|pitted]] [[Mary Lee Walsh|against]] [[Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc|one-dimensional]] [[Count Graduon|villains]]. This was likely a factor in Chris's susceptibility to trolling.

Eventually, Chris's desire for a more exciting life of heroes fighting against villains was fully exploited by the [[Idea Guys]] and [[other enablers]]. As a result, Chris now believes that he ''already'' leads the same life as his fantasy counterpart, and has lost interest in traditional trolls. He even started thanking them for helping him discover [[Transgender|his true self]].

==Today==
:''Main article: [[Weening]]''

Since the death of [[Bob Chandler|Chris's father]], the [[2014 house fire|loss of his home]] and [[Financhu Crisis|his plummet to the breadline]], Chris has changed profoundly. No longer is he the [[naïve]], [[Chris and fashion|clown-shirted]], [[Red Letter CWC Certified Day|indifferent]] [[Ego|egotist]] ED discovered in 2007; instead, he is a jaded, chronically depressed, [[Tomgirl|cross-dressing]], [[Messiah complex|delusional]] child trapped in an adult's body, who is not as susceptible to, capable of dealing with, and arguably, as deserving of trolling as he used to be.

Many of those who continue to follow his activities are beginning to opine that he has suffered enough, and that active trolling, even where it is successful, doesn't produce the results it used to, takes more effort due to his inflated paranoia, tends to lead to small groups monopolizing Chris and hoarding the information they gather (as happened with [[Blanca Weiss|Blanca]] and [[Catherine]]), and in some cases, causes needless emotional damage to Chris. For example, the revelation that Chris's latest girlfriend, Catherine, was yet another troll persona in early [[November 2014]] provoked disgust and disappointment, as many felt that not only was it [[Sonichu (character)|unoriginal]] and [[JULAAAY|no longer funny]], but the trolls had spent weeks, if not months stringing him along and toying with him, including tricking him into [[I Love You, Catherine|grovelling]] for "Catherine"'s continued affection. Many felt this amounted to emotional abuse of an already broken and miserable shell of a man, some were even disappointed as they felt that after all Chris had gone through, he deserved a lucky break, and a real relationship for a change.

Further, this was accompanied by the revelation that the same group of trolls had also fabricated Chris's denunciation by his [[Gal pal|high school friends]], leading to many questioning the morality of impersonating Chris's old friends just to get a reaction out of him, and of course, the terrifying [[CWCville|Orwellian nightmare]] that such trolling has left Chris in, as virtually every aspect of Chris's social life is [[Chris and manipulation|engineered by trolls]] and he has no way of knowing what or who is real – [[Savannah Chandler|even his own family]].

Chris's transformation has also coincided with, and perhaps influenced, a shift in trolling. Active, chronic trolling such as Chris has experienced is now generally looked down upon as [[weening]] and attention whoring; instead, it has become more fashionable to leave a lolcow like Chris to their own devices for the most part, and [[Passive observers|observe, rather than continually provoke]]. Proponents note that many major events in Chris's life have happened independent of troll influence, such as [[2014 house fire|him burning down his own home]], his various outings to [[Charlottesville, VA|Charlottesville]] and beyond (and many subsequent IRL bans), his bizarre dealings with [[Mary Lee Walsh]] and of course, the infamous [[28 October 2011]] and [[26 December 2014]] incidents. It can also be argued that much (if not most) of the trolling that Chris experienced since his discovery in 2007 was weening as well.

==See also==
* [[2012 Poster campaign]]
* [[4-cent garbage.com]]
* [[A-Logging]]
* [[CWCki]]
* [[Enablers]]
* [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]
* [[Kick the Autistic]]
* [[PVCC (Message Board)|PVCC]]
* [[Rollin' and Trollin']]
* [[Watchmen]] - The inverse of the Miscreants
* [[Weening]]
* [[White knight]]

==References==
<references/>

{{Trolls}}
{{People}}
{{Love quest}}
{{Articleofthenow}}

[[Category:Trolls]]
[[Category:Lists]]

SpaghettiRoutine

2026-05-15T20:37:54Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

'''SpaghettiRoutine''' is a [[YouTube]] [[video]] that [[Chris]] uploaded on 30 [[October 2010]]. [[Jackie]] had requested him to make a video depicting him actually cooking spaghetti (which is a very simple dish to make) in his [[Chris's kitchen|kitchen]]. Chris claimed that [[Barb|his mother]] had cluttered up the stove (which, knowing [[:File:Gibson.jpg|the state of their kitchen]], was probably true), and thus ''pretended'' to make spaghetti instead. Chris then presents microwaved spaghetti served on a paper plate and rubs his face in it. As he wipes the sauce from his face, he shoehorns in a not-so-subtle jab at [[Clyde Cash]].

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = SpaghettiRoutine
| ytid = BAIXSVcmZP8
| stardate = 30 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other|[[Obesity|Food]]}}, {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Racism|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}, {{Comedy|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}
| shirt = {{VertRedShirt|text}}
| previous = [[ShowerClean2]]
| next = [[WelcometoBollywood]]
}}

{{quote|Unfortunately, I don't have access to stove 'cause mama put a whole bunch of crap in the way.}}

=== Transcript ===
[[Image:Chefboyardee.jpg|thumb|right|Thank goodness for Chris's [[TRUE and HONEST]] Special Recipe. (DO NOT STEAL.)]]

For this presentation, I was going to make some spaghetti, live in the kitchen. But unfortunately, I don't have access to stove 'cause mama put a whole bunch of crap in the way. So, I am going to mime it.

[''Mimes picking up a pot.'']

Here's the pot.

[''Wipes down the imaginary stove and mimes putting the pot on the burner.'']

Put it on the stove.

[''Mimes turning on the stove.'']

Set it to the boiling temperature.

[''Gestures upwards, making a sound that imitates steam rushing up, before making a tapping motion with his fingers to represent the water bubbling.'']

Boop-boop-boop-boop! Ah, in time the water's boiling. So we take the pot of spaghetti noodles...

[''Mimics opening a package of dried noodles.'']

And...

[''Hissing noises, wild gestures.'']

Click click click click click click!

[''Stirring motions. Adopts a baby voice.'']

Noodles, smell so good!

[''Lifts pretend noodles as if on a spoon.'']

Mm, hey look at that. [[Duck|Drippy, no stiffy!]]

[''Holds them close to the camera.'']

I offer you some don—some non stiff drippy! But it's hot right now, so you might wanna wait a while.

[''More hissing, more stirring.'']

Yeah, I say our noodles are done.

[''More imaginary knob turning. Chris motions as if holding a fishing rod.'']

Hey, we pour—we drain the water out.

[''Does so, and sets “pot” down.'']

We get some plate-we get some plates.

[''Mimes getting plates down.'']

Oh wait a minute...we're serving two!

[''In light of this epiphany, Chris tosses the excess plates away and makes shattering sounds.'']

Heh heh! I'm just kiddin'.

[''More gesturing, seems to be serving spaghetti.'']

Fork.

[''Mimes scraping pot.'']

We don't want any noodles left behind! We'll rinse that out later! In the meantime, here's a good jar of marinara sauce.

[''Produces imaginary sauce. Unscrews it with unnecessary groaning noises, then a pop sound to indicate the lid coming off.'']

There we go, I popped the seal!

[''Pours it.'']

Bloop-bloop-bloop-bloop...and now some grated mozzarella!

[''Sings while caressing the mozzarella.'']

I gotta pop this seal. Bloop-bloop...

[''Shakes it over the food.'']

And we'll add other spices...from my father's collection, which includes rosemary, garlic, parsley, whatever.

[''More “unsealing”, more “shaking.”'']

And you can make your own meatballs with uh, processed meat and... put it all on a tray or something, let me throw it in, rolling it all into balls. But [[CWC - Hand Drawn Original|they end up not so good]], not as good, are they? So, what about we did, what if you buy your own meatballs? We had this pot-we had this package of Swedish meatballs, cook it in the microwave alread- so they're warming up already.

[''Opens a package of imaginary meatballs, does something unidentifiable to them, and appears to dump them all over the “table.”'']

And in the end, on one-at least on one of the two plates, you get somethin'...like this!

[''Turns the camera to focus on a plate of real, albeit canned, spaghetti and meatballs on a paper plate. Zooms in and out on it.'']

Yummy, yummy, delicious!

[''Focuses back on himself. Goes back to the baby voice.'']

So now we can sit down and eat our spaghetti. It is so delicious.

[''Stirs the plate of real spaghetti with a plastic fork.'']

Mmm...it smells so good!

[''Holds a forkful up to the camera.'']

You want a bite? Look at this, you want a bite? Mm, very good, num. You better take a bite, because you know what? Watch this- watch this- you watchin'?

[''Chris mashes his face into the spaghetti like a child and takes several disgusting bites, then emerges with sauce on his nose and chin. He holds out his arms and flashes a shit-eating grin, like he did something worth praising.'']

Ta-da!

[''Laughs. Wipes his face with a paper towel.'']

I'm just kiddin'. I wouldn't do that to you for real life, huh-huh. It's fun. Hey, [[Clyde Cash|at least my head's not fuckin' orange]]. Like a certain...

[''Wipes nose some more'']

...Cashey-type person I know.

[''Turns camera off.'']

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[ShowerClean2]]|nextlink=[[WelcometoBollywood]]}}

{{Videos}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

[[Category:Jacklyn's Naughty No Trick, All Treat, 31 Days of Halloween Contest| 2010-10-30 c]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, October 2010| 2010-10-30 c]]
[[Category:Jackie Saga videos| 2010-10-30 c]]
[[Category: Kodak camera videos| 2010-10-30 c]]

OmegaCon

2026-05-15T01:42:56Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

'''OmegaCon''' is a gaming and anime convention held annually in [[Charlottesville]], [[Virginia]]. Chris attended on Saturday, 29 August 2015. By all accounts, it was his first appearance at a convention since [[Anime Mid-Atlantic]] in 2005.

__TOC__

==2015==
On 29 August Chris announced on [[Facebook]]:

{{quotebox|At ‪#‎OmegaCon2015‬; totes ‪#‎BassCannon‬ the audience at ‪#‎Cosplay‬ Contest!}}

This was accompanied with a couple of photographs. It is not known who took these photos, but apparently Chris went alone.

<center><gallery>
File:OmegaconA.jpg
File:OmegaconB.jpg
</gallery></center>

Someone on Twitter provided another pose:

<center><gallery>
File:OmegaconD.jpg
</gallery></center>

Somehow Chris had managed to escape his domestic responsibilities to his [[Barbara Chandler|mother]] and his [[Clover and Snoopy|dogs]] to spend the day having fun.

When [[William Elliott Waterman]] mistook his costume as a "vocaloid," Chris clarified:
{{quote|Vocaloid?! I am Not a Computer! I'm Vinyl Scratch, A.K.A. DJ Pon3! A Musical Soul with a deep sense into that bass. A slave to the beat and rhythm. You do not program me, because I'm already programmed in my biological CPU!}}

[[File:OmegaconC.jpg|right|thumb|125px|Vinyl Scratch, AKA DJ Pon3.]]
[[Vinyl Scratch]] is a minor character in ''[[My Little Pony|My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic]]'' who also shows up in human form in the ''Equestria Girls'' film series, which Chris adores. She cohabits with another musically inclined pony named Octavia. Chris had been a fan of this character for some time. He had added 28 videos to a playlist called "Vinyl Scratch and Octavia" on his [[YouTube]] account, and had made a number of positive statements on Facebook. Vinyl Scratch brings together Chris's interests in [[music]], [[Impulse Gay Social Club|dancing]], and--while the children's cartoon doesn't go there--[[Homos#Chris the lesbian|lesbianism]].

Chris's [[Chris and cosplaying|costume]] appears to be largely homemade. He is wearing the same purple My Little Pony goggles as when he attended his first [[Cville Pride|pride festival]] in August 2014, and when he [[26 December 2014|maced a GameStop manajerk]]. Vinyl Scratch's purple tights are conveniently suited to Chris's tucking methods. He had first given himself the terrible blue [[hair]] dye job in July. The musical notes on his costume are the [[Chris and Music|wrong way around]], because he used a [[Autism|flipped image as a reference]]. He is also, rather surprisingly, wearing his famous [[medallion]] in public, possibly for the first time since [[2010]]. This is similar to how he cosplayed "as himself" at Anime Mid-Atlantic for the sake of self-promotion. This time around, however, he's also promoting the medallions themselves, as they are his hottest [[eBay]] item.

Chris entered the cosplay [[contest]], posing for the contest line and a group photo. His performance was presumably not unlike what the crowds at [[Impulse Gay Social Club]] have to put up with every weekend. A few days later Chris would reveal that he had just finished a seven-week belly dancing course, which undoubtedly influenced his moves.

<center><gallery>
File:OmegaconK.png
File:OmegaconL.jpg
File:OmegaconH.jpg
File:OmegaCon2015.jpg
File:OmegaconF.jpg
File:OmegaconG.jpg
File:OmegaconJ.jpg
</gallery></center>

He didn't win. This doesn't seem to have dampened his spirits, though--he gave the event a five-star review on Facebook.

Field agents report that Chris also attended a panel for indie game developers and used the Q&A segment to rant about the trolls and cyber-bullies. He handed out his [[business card]] to everyone he could, and carried his [[Sonichu Amiibo]] with him in a bag bearing the marriage equality logo and the message "TOTES GAY" written in large letters.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/fb-8-29-15-chris-goes-to-omegacon2015.12123/page-16#post-956952 (archive: https://archive.ph/AUYsz)</ref>

===Videos===
Someone on YouTube posted seven seconds of surreptitious footage: {{Infobox/video
| name = Chandler.mp4
| video = {{#ev:archiveorg|youtube-fGnDrQeZVWY}}
| stardate = 29 [[August 2015]]
| subject = {{convention|text}}
| previous = [[26 December 2014#23 July hearing|Chris' Latest White Knight]]
| next = [[Super Smash Bros. Videos#CWC Mii Showcase|CWC Mii Showcase]]
}}


Chris can be seen very briefly in this walkthrough at 3:46 with a small group: {{Infobox/video
| name = OmegaCon Walkthrough
| video = {{#ev:youtube|-wCtvVv1QoE}}
| stardate = 29 [[August 2015]]
| subject = {{convention|text}}
| previous = [[26 December 2014#23 July hearing|Chris' Latest White Knight]]
| next = [[Super Smash Bros. Videos#CWC Mii Showcase|CWC Mii Showcase]]
}}

{{Deletedvideo}}

Another image of Chris on stage shows up at 7:21 of this slideshow: {{Infobox/video
| name = Omegacon 2015 Musical Slideshow
| video = {{#ev:youtube|rB8GWRyzMjQ}}
| stardate = 31 [[August 2015]]
| subject = {{convention|text}}
| previous = [[26 December 2014#23 July hearing|Chris' Latest White Knight]]
| next = [[Super Smash Bros. Videos#CWC Mii Showcase|CWC Mii Showcase]]
}}

Chris also appears at 0:28 in this [https://www.facebook.com/DarkfoxPhotography/videos/1090586627629503/ video] of the contest line: {{Infobox/video
| name = CWC at Omega Con
| video = {{#ev:youtube|bkKily7bFg0}}
| stardate = 31 [[August 2015]]
| subject = {{convention|text}}
| previous = [[26 December 2014#23 July hearing|Chris' Latest White Knight]]
| next = [[Super Smash Bros. Videos#CWC Mii Showcase|CWC Mii Showcase]]
}}

==2016==

[[File:Cwc cosplay omegacon 2016.jpg|thumb|250px|Cosplay]]
[[File:Cwc omegacon 2016 day 1.jpg|thumb|200px|Chris, on the 26th]]

Chris attended on all three days of the event in 2016, from 26-28 August, due to winning a free ticket last year<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/7-18-new-update-omegacon-and-more-ebegging.22640/page-13#post-1618484</ref>.

According to [[Kim]] on [[July_2016_Facebook_posts#.22I.27m_not_on_drugs.21.22|Facebook]], this is where Chris tried smoking [[Tobacky|marijuana]] that he had gotten from Bobby Marley.

On the 27th, a field agent posted this report:<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/omegacon-2016.23786/page-2#post-1704200</ref><ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/omegacon-2016.23786/page-8#post-1705441</ref>

{{quotebox|Posting live from Omegacon. Observed him while he sat in a panel. He looked like he was wearing the same thing as yesterday. Take this observation with a grain of salt but during the Q&A portion he would seem much more interested when a girl asked a question; looking at them while they spoke, but didn't do the same when a guy spoke. Like a said, may be nothing or he trained himself not to pay attention to men. Flipped and shook his hair out and the girl behind him leaned back slightly and made a face.

Lost him afterwards and it looks like he left since his car is gone. No idea if he'll be back.}}

{{quotebox|I saw him talking to some girl and it looked like she was uncomfortable, which is pretty normal when weirdos try and talk to girls at cons and not getting the hint to let them go. But he didn't do anything super lulzy and didn't chimp out on anyone or anything in general.
}}

The report on the 28th:<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/omegacon-2016.23786/page-12#post-1706805</ref><ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/omegacon-2016.23786/page-13#post-1708480</ref>

{{quotebox|Chris was playing Pokemon against some 7 year old and beat him. Didn't act like a shit to the kid but would sigh periodically. He wore the same thing for a third day in a row. Has two silver rings on his right hand that were connected by a blue string. I never noticed this about his thinning hair; I just thought he had a receding hairline, but the top of his hair is pretty sparse and short. An older lady(not the same one as the picture posted here) referred to Chris as Christine and used female pronouns. Chris also has a MASSIVE binder full of hundreds of Pokemon cards. Saw him later rushing around with what looked like an empty food carton. I don't know.}}

{{quotebox|So he was at a vendor that was across from the Tabletop room to buy some Ramune(weeb soda). This vendor sold weeb snacks along with Pokemon merchandise. After Chris paid he was digging in the cooler to find the one he bought and he chuckled to himself while going, "Well I hope I didn't buy anything Team Rocket stole." Commence the fake awkward laughter from the person running the table. }}

==References==
<references/>

==External Links==
* [http://www.omegaconvention.com/ Official Website]

{{Places}}

[[Category:Places]]

LOOK at the truth!

2026-05-11T22:35:27Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

'''LOOK at the truth!''' is a video that was released on 10 [[August 2009]], in which Chris ([[Solid]]) attempts to clarify the differences between himself and [[Liquid Chris]].

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = LOOK at the truth!
| ytid = _i_bNC8EGBw
| stardate = 10 [[August 2009]]
| style = {{Reason|text}}
| saga = {{Liquid|text}}
| shirt = {{RedShirt|text}}
| previous = [[CCWC's Final Warning to the Second CWC|CCWC's Final Warning to the Second CWC]]
| next = [[KCWC Top 10 Dedication Special]]
}}
{{quote|Who has the body type that has been mocked for the long time? [[Obesity|I do.]]}}

=== Transcript ===

[''Removes glasses, leaves them on a table his right''] Alright, let's get some similarities and differences compared. Personality traits: in the longer run who has been the [[Captain's Log, Stardate March 27th, 2009|cooler man]], who has origin on everything in the [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] [[comic]]s, as you noticed in all the videos I have been the cooler man, I have been [[CHRIS!!! CHANDLER!!!|more calm]] and even my voice sounds more similar to everything in the past recordings, including my [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|25th birthday]] and [''drops [[PS3]] controller and points with both hands at his head''] look at my face. The very same face from February 24th [''makes 2's with both hands''] [[2007|two years ago]].

And another thing: yes. [''Lowers down to grab his plastic guitar''] I have never learned to play a [[Chris and music#Instruments|real guitar]], but that doesn't mean I could not rock, so that's a good reason why [''strikes the guitar, as finishing a riff''] I play on the ''[[Guitar Hero]]''. [''Leaves guitar at his right side''] Started out on PlayStation 2, where it originally started, you know. And another thing...

[''Video jumps'']

I have still been having a ch- harder time of trying find a [[boyfriend-free girl]] int- to make to a [[sweetheart]] from the ground-up. Yet he was able to get a [[Kacey|girlfriend]]... [''snaps his fingers''] like that. Big difference! In the longer run, the real Christopher Christian Weston Chandler had a harder time... and still is having a bit of a hard time. [''Deep breath'']

And also if you look at the eight-year old photo, and I have recently looked back upon it, an eight-year old video. Eight-year old video. And in previous videos and photographs including on the [[Encyclopaedia Dramatica]] page, yes it is true. I'm no longer ashamed of it. [''Moves body 90 degrees to his left''] I was born with the body type that has... [''flashes the camera''] [[Muscle bra|MANBOOBS]]! [''Grabs both breasts with both hands and plays with them''] My type. [''Lowers shirt''] You might say a little type in the "A" and a little bit of size A. But I'm a man, so there. I'm still a man.

My [[Duck|DICK]] was on that Encyclopaedia Dramatica page. They, it was falsely brought on, because the [[trolls]] posed as women who falsely gained my trust. I know, it's my fault, my fault that those trolls got the information, but still they documented it for the longest time since about... some about [[2006]] or [[2007]], when I first found the ED page in 2007 in [''mumbles'']. It was just getting started on that... about late [[2007#October|October]] then.

Plus also, green and purple striped shirt. I think the picture was blurry, but that's still my face, so there you go. That's a few big differences between me and him. Is he the man with the body-type of manboobs, A negative blood. Born on 24 February [[1982]], born with the name of Christopher Weston Chandler, went to Regency Square found- had the inspiration for the [[Christopher's name change|name change]] in 1989 by the English speaking conductor [[Leonard Bearstein]]. Does he? [''Shakes head horizontally''] No. And you know his diploma and his degree that he had displayed, counterfeited from the pictures that were taken from the slideshow on a [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|DVD]] which was only distributed family and close friend-wise. It would not have leaked if the troll had not posed as my very first female crush on all the way back to Greene County Primary days. [''Long pause, staring at the camera''] So there.

Remember, who has a longer history? I do. Who has the [[Obesity|body type]] that has been mocked for the long time? I do. He does not have any of these things. He has nothing, all that he has [''lowers his body to grab a white sheet of paper''] is a piece of paper that I can get 500 sheets of at [[Walmart]] [''tears sheet of paper''] for five bucks.

So I'll leave you with that. Quit with this game, man and quit with the- with the supporting the impostor, trolls. I have thanked you for the [[CWCki|documentations]]. You can go troll [[Joshua Martinez]] for all I care because he is a liar. He is a liar. At this point I don't care much about him, so go ahead, troll him.

Peace out, have a good day, stay safe.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[CCWC's Final Warning to the Second CWC]]|nextlink=[[KCWC Top 10 Dedication Special]]|}}
{{The Cwcivil War of 2009}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2009| 2009-08-10]]
[[Category:Liquid Saga videos| 2009-08-10]]
[[Category:Videos published to IBAChandler]]

Kacey Call 7

2026-05-10T06:27:28Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

Kacey Call 7 was the seventh Kacey call, and took place on 1 [[September 2009]].

==Summary==
*[[Kacey]] is still shocked that [[Chris]] is on Lipitor. Chris says the food group he eats the most is vegetables.
*The Chandlers have three refrigerators. Chris whines about the house being a mess. [[Bob]] does most of the home cooking.
*Chris says he'll go jogging with Kacey, but tries to back out when she says they'll be jogging five whole miles.
*Chris needs to buy a [[sports bra]] because his manboobs bounce.
*Chris was going to talk to social security about getting a [[job]] and a house, and his [[dad]] wouldn't let him go alone.
*Chris definitely felt like more of an adult when he turned 21.
*Chris would definitely not date an 18 year old, the youngest he would date is 21 (at the age 27). Kacey says that 6 years difference is too much for a relationship.
*[[Third date]] = [[sex]], Chris learned from [[TV]]. He definitely does not think of Kacey like that though.
*Chris has waited a "LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG time" for sex. "It hurts".
*Kacey tells Chris he does not need to have sex in order to have a fulfilling relationship. She warns him that sex will not automatically solve his problems and that if he continues hyping up losing his virginity like he'd been doing at that point, then he'll only [[Virgin with rage#Aftermath|severely disappoint himself]] when [[Mia Hamm|the time finally comes]].
*Chris has [[masturbate]]d so much that he "can't even feel that much of a rush from it".
*Chris tells Kacey to become a born again virgin because he saw it on ''King of the Hill''.
*Chris, regarding Bluespike and other troll relationships: "I have learned from my mistakes."
*Chris randomly admits that he used to confuse Michael Jordan with Michael Jackson.
*Chris implies that he has been jerking off to Kacey.

==Video==
<center>
{{Infobox/Audiofile
| name = Kacey Call 7
| audio = {{#ev:youtube|9LqWVE8_uE8}}
| Stardate = 1 September 2009
| Featuring = [[Chris]]; [[Kacey]]
| Saga = {{Liquid}} Liquid Saga
| previous = [[Kacey Call 6]]
| next = [[Kacey Call 8]]
}} </center>

==Transcript==

'''Chris:''' Hello?

'''Kacey:''' Hi, Chris! It’s Kacey!

'''Chris:''' Hi, Kacey! How are you?

'''Kacey:''' I’m okay. How about you?

'''Chris:''' I’m okay. I’m doing—I’m fair now. Y’know, I just talked to… uh… [[Kim]]. She gave me some… uh… wise words. She talked to you about [[Chris and health|exercising, veggies and whatnot]]. But, yeah, I’m gonna be- gonna [pause] be working- yeah I’m gonna be working on that. I’m- I’m serious.

'''Kacey:''' [interrupting] Oh, well Chris I-I-I don’t know if you’ve really ris- If you’ve really realized the gravity of your situation. I mean, when you told me you were on cholesterol medicine at your age… I mean just- just wow! I-I mean that’s not good. [pause] Like do you realize how serious it is if you’re put on that at your age?

'''Chris:''' I was [unintelligible]

'''Kacey:''' [interrupting] I mean you have a really horrible life expectancy. [pause]

'''Chris:''' Hmm. I saw it as a precaution…

'''Kacey:''' No! A doctor would not let you go on that as just a precaution, because those drugs can actually hurt you if you don’t need them. [pause]

'''Chris:''' Hmm. I didn’t… let’s see. Okay. Well… Alright, well, maybe I’ll-I’ll-I can get off the Lipitor and see how I… uh… how I go from there.

'''Kacey:''' No, no. I mean if you’re on it, you’re probably on it for a reason, Chris. I mean your doctor wouldn’t give it to you unless you really needed it. And, I mean, getting off it would only hurt you. The point is that you need to get to a point where you don’t need it, if you can even do that. I mean, if you’re already on it, you may not be able to reverse that. [pause] I mean that this is like… you’re really close to… you know, going into a hospital or something. I mean, that’s scary.

'''Chris:''' Hmm. Yeah, it is scary… Hmm. It is scary.

'''Kacey:''' I mean, but I don’t-I don’t think you realize it. Okay, did you suggest getting on these pills to the doctor or did the doctor suggest you getting on them?

'''Chris:''' Uh… Alright, let me think back to that day, that day. That was like… I don’t know, that was like about a year-about months to a year ago. Something like that.

'''Kacey:''' Okay, months to a year ago is a long… big difference. Big difference.

'''Chris:''' I mean when I-when I started on that and then I talked to my doctor… Hmm… Yeah, I was just… uh, okay, yeah. He was encouraging me for exercise and I was doing that and not eat so much high cholesterol-type foods and I have not been eating that much, so that… By the way…

'''Kacey:''' [interrupting] Chris, you do eat high-cholesterol foods! Everything you told me has high cholesterol. And sodium. Sodium plays a part in it too. I mean, that’s all you eat.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, but it’s also, she mentioned, sometimes I’ve been getting up at-by twelve o’clock and I eat like two meals in a day.

'''Kacey:''' Okay, you only eat two meals a day or you eat two meals at once? Cause I’m pretty sure your portion control is horrible too.

'''Chris:''' Two meals in one day.

'''Kacey:''' That’s- that’s bad. You’re supposed to have, like, five little meals. That’s gonna kill your metabolism too. I mean, that’s one of the problems I have is that I don’t eat enough. Um, but the problem is that, if you eat two meals a day, those meals are able to do the amount of calories you need, that’s just bad.

'''Chris:''' Hmm. I see. Hmm, that’s a lot for me to think about.

'''Kacey:''' [interrupting] Okay, okay, like with portions do you actually know how much a portion of meat is?

'''Chris:''' Mmm, a portion… I do not.

'''Kacey:''' It’s about as big as a deck of cards. You should- [Chris interrupts: “Oh.”] -probably be eating about three to eight ounces.

'''Chris:''' Oh, okay. Three oun- three to eight- three to eight ounces of meat in a day?

'''Kacey:''' No, no, no. For a portion.

'''Chris:''' Oh, for proportion… per portion in a day? I mean, I’m just trying to make sure I understand this here. [pause]

'''Kacey:''' Um, Chris. Are you there?

'''Chris:''' Yeah, I’m here.

'''Kacey:''' Okay, okay. Never mind. I can hear you now. Sorry, my phone’s being weird. It’s like on a delay.

'''Chris:''' Oh.

'''Kacey:''' But, no, no. Like, a deck of cards, that’s about the size of… Well, you know, that’s just an example. You can look these things up. You know, the internet’s a great tool for that.

'''Chris:''' Okay.

'''Kacey:''' But, I mean, you know… Okay, what would you say you eat the most? Like, what food group would you say you eat the most?

'''Chris:''' I would say that I would eat vegetables the most.

'''Kacey:''' Okay, h-how are you going to eat vegetables the most if what you tell me is that your diet mostly consists of Hungry Man dinners and McDonald’s and Wendy’s?

'''Chris:''' Well, firstly, I have not eaten a Hungry Man in like… over a month. I can honestly say that. I can also say that…

'''Kacey:''' [interrupting] Okay, what vegetables have you eaten this week?

'''Chris:''' I have eaten lettuce and tomato and carrots…

'''Kacey:''' You do know that lettuce has almost no nutritional value, right? You should be eating field grains or romaine lettuce.

'''Chris:''' Uh, I’m sorry. What was that? Uh, something about…

'''Kacey:''' [interrupting] Lettuce has no nu- yeah- lettuce has no nutritional value. If you’re going to eat it, it’s just roughage. If you’re going to eat it, you should eat mixed field greens or romaine lettuce.

'''Chris:''' Oh, mixed field greens. That’s what you said. Mixed field greens. Okay.

'''Kacey:''' Okay, so basically, what you’re saying is you just eat some salads that are just thrown together. Y-you do know that that’s not necessarily healthy, right? Cause even vegetables and fruits in excess can be bad for you, because they have carbs and sugar.

'''Chris:''' Hmm. [pause] I see. I did not realize that. Oh, by the way I didn’t- by the way I was checking my email- I check my email twice a day and I did not receive the email with the… uh… links to the [unintelligible] with the recipes and all the stuff we talked about last night.

'''Kacey:''' Okay, well, I-I’ll resend them. I guess my email’s having problems. Um, I’ll look into that.

'''Chris:''' Okay.

'''Kacey:''' But-But still, I mean, you know everything needs to be in moderation. Even things you think are healthy. Okay, tell me what you ate today. W-We’ll just start with that. What have you eaten today?

'''Chris:''' Okay, well, I ate two side-salads from [[Burger King]] and I had a grilled chicken sandwich.

'''Kacey:''' Okay, so you’re still eating unhealthy.

'''Chris:''' Uh, I’m still eating unhealthy?

'''Kacey:''' Yes, okay. You ate at Burger King. Right there, that should be your red flag. Nothing they have, even their salads, are healthy. Nothing. The healthiest thing they can give you is water.

'''Chris:''' I have drank plenty of water today. I drank, like, five glasses so far.

'''Kacey:''' That’s not even enough [skip] you should be drinking in a day.

'''Chris:''' I know, I should be drinking, like, eight eight-ounce glasses or equivalent. [pause] Well you know, I might have miscounted. I was drinking from a sixteen-ounce bottle and I refilled it about…

'''Kacey:''' Is the water very cold?

'''Chris:''' Yeah, it’s cold water. We keep- we- we… uh… keep- have, like, bottles of water put in the fridge. [[Barb|My mom]] prefers the bottled water over the tap water.

'''Kacey:''' Okay, cause- when you drink bottled water you should always make sure it’s really cold, because even though it doesn’t help a lot, it helps a little, but your body has to warm up after you drink it and it does help with some calories. Not a lot though, but you should keep hydrated.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, okay. That’s good then. Yeah, that’s good. But, anyway, yeah, our- the water I’ve drank today, it’s been cold.

'''Kacey:''' Okay, that’s good. That’s good. But, I mean, so all you’ve had today is a salad and a chicken sandwich?That’s it?

'''Chris:''' And water, yes.

'''Kacey:''' Okay, yeah. That’s okay. Um, you need to get a better eating plan. I mean, I do too. So I mean, I’m right there with you, but of course I don’t eat fast food either. But, you really… I mean, okay. Is the reason you eat at Burger King because it’s convenient?

'''Chris:''' Uh, that and my parents, my mom and [[Bob|dad]], are pretty much going there more often.

'''Kacey:''' Why don’t you guys have fresh food in the house?

'''Chris:''' We have food in the house, but yeah, [[14 Branchland Court|our house]] is such a mess. It’s been a mess for a long time, ever since I had to take furniture out of the living room to put up into the kitchen, just like I put up a [[Christmas]] tree. That was pretty much the beginning of all that. And then I had [mumble] to take the tree down...

'''Kacey:''' Okay Chris, your house can’t be so bad that you can’t have food in your fridge.

'''Chris:''' I mean, yeah, we do have food in- we have, like- we have three refrigerators. Two downstairs, one upstairs and they all have food- and they all have food in them.

'''Kacey:''' Why do you have three refrigerators?

'''Chris:''' (Offended/stressed) I don’t know why my mom and dad needed two refrigerators downstairs, but we got another one upstairs.

'''Kacey:''' Okay. Well, okay. Okay then. Um, what- okay. Then is you have food in those fridges, why don’t you guys cook. Why don’t you guys make dinner? I mean, or even, you know…

'''Chris:''' Yeah, my father- my father does most of the home cooking, really at this point. Uh, and…

'''Kacey:''' Okay, well what types of things does he cook? Like, what’s the last time he… What did he make the last time he cooked?

'''Chris:''' He makes a- he makes a- he makes some pretty good soups… and stews. Sometimes pasta.

'''Kacey:''' Okay.

'''Chris:''' You know you’re wel- you know you’re welcome to call him at any time on the home phone and talk to him- introduce yourself to him and talk to him any time you want to.

'''Kacey:''' I thought you told me to wait, like you didn’t want me to talk to him yet.

'''Chris:''' Yeah. Yeah, wait. Yeah, that’s right. I did tell you to wait. Yeah, wait ‘til maybe around Thursday or Friday. Yeah, cause last week I told you about that. Almost a week ago, now.

'''Kacey:''' Okay. Well, you just remind me that and we’ll go from there.

'''Chris:''' Okay.

'''Kacey:''' But, um. But, yeah, your eating habits really need some reform. I mean, has your doctor talked to you about your life expectancy?

'''Chris:''' Uhhhhh… my doc- I cannot…

'''Kacey:''' [interrupting] Do you even know what a life expectancy is?

'''Chris:''' I-I do have an understanding of what life expendancy is. It’s a rough estimate of how once- how long a person’s going to live.

'''Kacey:''' Okay, I’m impressed. Um… but have they talked to you about that?

'''Chris:''' Yeah, my doctor has not talk- has not talked to me about my life expendancy.

'''Kacey:''' Mmkay.

'''Chris:''' So, I have no idea about that.

'''Kacey:''' Okay, well… um… Okay, what… Since you mentioned I talked to Kim… um… yeah, I talked to her, cause like, one of the things I first noticed is the way you carry yourself, and it looks like you’re putting a lot of weight on your joints, especially your elbows and your knees, and that could be bad. Like… um… like, are you stretching them. Uh, cause you need to for your ligaments.

'''Chris:''' Yes, I do stretch. I stretch my arms out and they…

'''Kacey:''' Okay, what type- what type of stretches do you do?

'''Chris:''' Uh, basic stretches, you know. Yeah, like knee-bends, I’ve done those. I’ve done- I do those. And arm stretches. Yeah.

'''Kacey:''' Oh, I mean, are you doing any kinds of resistance stretches, like putting your palm against a wall and stretching your arms straight out and then pushing?

'''Chris:''' Wait. Putting my arm against my ball?

'''Kacey:''' A wall, Chris! A wall! [laughs]

'''Chris:''' Oh! Oh, oh. You mean like you’re pushing something. Uh, no, I have not thought about that.

'''Kacey:''' Well, cause I mean, the stretching that you’re probably thinking of are not stretches you need to do. Like, when you stretch, you need to have some sort of resistance, so you can feel a stretch, and that lets you know that you are exercising your ligaments and that they’re gonna stay healthy, because that’s your bone to bone and that’s what you need to have.

'''Chris:''' Okay. [pause]

'''Kacey:''' Like, if you can’t feel that stretch, that- that’s not good. I mean, maybe you should get, like, a gym membership. Like, your doctor can help you fill out some paperwork for a discount.

'''Chris:''' Hmm… my doctor can help me get a discount at a gym membership?

'''Kacey:''' If you medically need it, your doctor can help you with a lot of things.

'''Chris:''' Aren’t you… Yeah, I-I-I’ll definitely bring that up with [[Doctor McGovern]] when- the next time I talk to him.

'''Kacey:''' Alright, that’s good.

'''Chris:''' Okay.

'''Kacey:''' But, I mean, like, the way you carry your arms just shows that you have a limited range of motion and that worries me, cause you know, I want you to be healthy.

'''Chris:''' Carry my arms around?

'''Kacey:''' Yeah, I-I’ll have to show you sometime. The way you hold them, it’s like… I-I’d have to just show you. But, it shows that you have a limited range of motion and… um… you could probably… um… do fairly well with a lot of better stretching.

'''Chris:''' Um… I think I was…

'''Kacey:''' Like, like, you can just put your arms in a praying position, so you have your palms to your palms, and hold your arms… um… across from you and that’s actually a great way to stretch, and it helps your elbow and your wrist.

'''Chris:''' Huh. I keep my praying hands vertical while my arms are horizontal?

'''Kacey:''' Um… no, no. You just wanna… you wanna put your hands together like you’re praying in front of you, and…

'''Chris:''' Uh-huh.

'''Kacey:''' …you wanna keep your arms straight, so that… um… they’re just going right out in front of you. Like y-you want them to be perpendicular to your body. You want… okay?

'''Chris:''' Okay, yeah. I can visualize that. Yeah, I under- I’m- I’m understanding you.

'''Kacey:''' Okay. But, yeah. You could totally benefit from that, cause you know, I want you to be healthy. Um… yeah. So we definitely have to find a time where we can go jogging, right?

'''Chris:''' Yeah, sure. Next time… uh… next time you get the chance to, you know, come visit, yeah. I’d be happy to go jogging with you.

'''Kacey:''' That would be awesome. We should totally do it.

'''Chris:''' Alright.

'''Kacey:''' A nice, five-mile jog, right? We gotta get those… uh… beats-per-minute up.

'''Chris:''' Waitaminute waitaminute. Five miles?

'''Kacey:''' Yeah! Five miles is really easy. That’s like, beginner stuff. Well, if you want, we can do 2.5 miles, but, you know, that’s really beginning stuff. If you can’t do that... you need… that-that’s not good. At all.

'''Chris:''' Mmm. It’s just that, you know, five miles, yeah, that does sound like a exaggeration in my head at this point.

'''Kacey:''' I-It’s only five miles. It’s not like I’m asking you to run a marathon. And it’s not like we’d be sprinting, we’d just be, like, doing nice, easy… jogging. Just…

'''Chris:''' Yeah, okay. And Kim suggested that I get a [[muscle bra|sports bra]], because you know… I just know that, you know… if I’m gonna start jogging, I’m gonna feel… I’m gonna feel my [[manboobs]] bounce.

'''Kacey:''' Well, this is why you’re doing it, to get rid of them. I mean, just where a jacket on top or an extra shirt. There should be no problem. I mean, as long as you… I mean… no one’s gonna care, really. [laughs] I mean, who do you think goes out jogging? People who need to lose weight. You’re not gonna be the only one.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, okay. Would you recommend I where a sports bra? Because, Kim’s recommending me- recommending at this point.

'''Kacey:''' They-they make… Okay, yes. You should.

'''Chris:''' Okay.

'''Kacey:''' I mean, if you are really that worried, those will keep them down and you probably should go out and get one soon.

'''Chris:''' Uh… I’m sorry. What was that last statement?

'''Kacey:''' Y-you should go out and get one soon if you want, cause I mean, if you’re really worried about five miles, then you should go practice without me.

'''Chris:''' Okay. Yeah.

'''Kacey:''' And then that way, when I’m there, you can be ready.

'''Chris:''' Alright, yeah. Um, let me ask you though… uh… when I go shopping for a sports bra… I’m going to get my [[tugboat]] later this week so, I’ll probably like… uh… do you recommend I go to [skip] [[Wal-Mart]] or a store at the mall or, w-what questions do you recommend I ask for when I go shopping for a sports bra, when I’m being assisted? Like… you know… because… you know…

'''Kacey:''' Well, you don’t need to be assisted. I mean, it’s pretty self-explanatory. Most of them are in Small, Medium, Large, and Extra-Large sizes, so you just get one that fits. Or you could go to, like, a Sports Authority or some type of sports store and they have them. But, I mean, t-the sizes aren’t complicated. It’s not like a real bra-size. [pause]

'''Chris:''' Yeah, okay. I can see that, yeah. [pause] Mmm… [makes clock-like ticking sound?] Alright. Okay. Well, let me ask you from your point of view… I mean, you’ve seen me in person. Umm… Would you say I’m like- would you say I’m like a Medium, Large, or Extra-Large, cause I’m no- I can tell you… I’m pretty sure I’m not a small.

'''Kacey:''' Umm… Well, grab the Large and the Extra-Large and try them both on and just see whichever one fits.

'''Chris:''' Ah, okay. So, your saying I’m- I’m pretty much a Large at best. [chuckles] Okay.

'''Kacey:''' Well, I mean, i-if… What I’m saying is: if you’re really trying to also get into, like, a sports bra or something, they’re gonna be designed for women, unless you can find the ones that are designed for men. I mean, there are gym things for that, that are designed for men, but you’d have to go to, like, a sports store or something. So, I-I mean, just… I’d always try a bigger size first, cause it’s easier to go down than it is to go up. So… uh… [Chris chuckles again] Try… You have a Dick’s Sporting Goods near you, right? Try there.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, OK. I’ll try there.

'''Kacey:''' I mean, what- okay. Like, the shirts you wore when you met me, what sizes are those?

'''Chris:''' Umm…

'''Kacey:''' Like, what size is your striped shirt?

'''Chris:''' Uh, yeah. I think that- I think that was… oh, wait a minute. I have it right in front of me. [[Chris and fashion|My favorite striped shirt.]] Um… um… Yeah, I see the L. I… uh… think it’s an XL though, because it seems like the X is worn out. Yeah, so… uh… that- that’s an XL right there.

'''Kacey:''' Y-you say it’s an Extra-Large. Cause, I mean, it seemed a bit… uh… snug on you last time I saw you, so um…

'''Chris:''' Hmm…

'''Kacey:''' Maybe, you’re, like, a two-X or a three-X.

'''Chris:''' [groans] That sounds like a- [groans again]

'''Kacey:''' T-there’s- That’s not bad. I mean, it really isn’t. But, I mean…

'''Chris:''' I mean, it just- it just sounds- it just sounds bad. I don’t know. Uh…

'''Kacey:''' No it doesn’t. I mean, you can’t let those things have power over you.

'''Chris:''' Yeah. Yeah, you’re right. Yeah. I shouldn’t let ‘em have power over me. Umm… Hang on a second. I’m wearing a- I’m currently wearing a bit looser fitting than…

'''Kacey:''' Okay. Yeah, let’s see the size.

'''Chris:''' [grunts while taking shirt off] Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. This one says XL.

'''Kacey:''' Okay, well- well then I-I would start there. I would start with Extra-Larges.

'''Chris:''' Okay. Are they making a Double-XL and a Triple-XL sports bra?

'''Kacey:''' Yes!

'''Chris:''' Wow.

'''Kacey:''' I-I mean… you know… girls have… breasts, you know. [chuckles] I mean, even if a girl is really skinny, but she has… they’re large, she’s not gonna fit into a small. I mean, come on, Chris.

'''Chris:''' [loud, high-pitched laughter] Yeah, you’re right! You’re right. It’s just- I’m sorry. It just caught me off guard cause [[Tomgirl|I’m a guy]]. And then… I don’t know… If I were, like, a bigger guy. Heh. Yeah, they were originally meant for women, but then guys caught on. Yeah. Okay. [little laugh] Yeah, I’m cool.

'''Kacey:''' Alright.

'''Chris:''' Okay.

'''Kacey:''' So… um… anything on your mind besides that?

'''Chris:''' Um… yeah, okay. I could say a little bit… Okay, I talked to my father today about, like you know, writing up the list of questions he was gonna suggest for going to see Soc-[trips over words] see [[tugboat|Social Security]] people about the job and the housing and all that.

'''Kacey:''' Uh-huh.

'''Chris:''' But, he was like: “Oh no,we’re…” uh… “Oh no, I’m planning to go- on going down there with you tomorrow afternoon.” So… yeah…

'''Kacey:''' Maybe your father doesn’t have any faith in you. Maybe he thinks you’re gonna mess it up, but you know what, you should tell him, “Look, Dad, I know you want everything to go well, but it’s gonna look better on me if I do this.” Like, if he wants to take you, that’s fine. Like, if he wants to drive. But, they’re not gonna take you seriously if you have your father there, because they’re gonna be like, “Why are you even bothering?”

'''Chris:''' Yeah... I think I… uh… I might be underselling myself a little bit anyway, but… um… Yeah, I wouldn’t even be sure… I’m not… I just don’t feel like, you know… E-even with the bas- even with the basic questions that we have talked about before, I feel like, you know, they could be more questions that are, like, more appropriate. And plus, my father has proven himself to be… uh… proven himself to be more… m-more of… uh… you know, definitely going down to getting the nitty-gritty of the details and…

'''Kacey:''' But still, if you let him talk all the time and not you, they’re gonna think he’s doing this for money. They’re not gonna take you seriously. They’re gonna think you’re trying to abuse the system. And you don’t want that, do you?

'''Chris:''' Uh, yeah, I do not want that. Uh, [mumbles] I-I can do most of the talking. Cause it’s mostly- It’s mo- It’s my thing. I can do most of the talking.

'''Kacey:''' Well, I mean, they’re gonna be talking to you. They’re not even gonna want to talk to your father. Your father has nothing to do with it. You’re twenty-seven. I mean if they’re gonna ta- If they’re talking to him and not you, then they totally see you as absolutely disabled, and there’s no point in doing it anyway. They’re gonna want to talk to you. They’re not… They’re gonna be asking you questions. They’re not gonna talk to him. The most they would talk to him about is if he’s your caregiver.

'''Chris:''' Yeah. Okay. Yeah, I…

'''Kacey:''' [interrupting] And you want to be more able-bodied than that.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, I do. I do want to be more able-bodied than that. [pause] I do.

'''Kacey:''' That’s good. That’s a good attitude to have.

'''Chris:''' Mmmmm… yeah. So, anyway, I’m goin’ down- I’m goin’ down there… You know, I guess my father will be down there for support. Yeah, I’ll do most of the talking and… I’ll try to ask as many- I’ll ask as many questions as I can think of…

'''Kacey:''' Uh-huh.

'''Chris:''' You know, try to keep him just in the background or just, like, you know… I don’t know… a piece of decoration? [laughs]

'''Kacey:''' What?

'''Chris:''' I-I don’t know. It’s just… just being a… I said- I said “decoration.”

'''Kacey:''' Okay.

'''Chris:''' You know. A-Anyway, you know, I’ll do- I’ll do most of the talking. I’ll ask as many questions as I can think of, and if I run short on questions, then I’m pretty sure that… uh… he’ll fill up the void. I mean, you give me- you have given me- you and Kim have both given me plenty of information, so it’s like, you know, so I can at least have a start of what I’m look- of what I’m looking for to find more information of like the work ticket or the… uh… trial period.

'''Kacey:''' Right.

'''Chris:''' And then…

'''Kacey:''' [interrupting] And remember, you can get an extended trial period, so don’t let them sell you short.

'''Chris:''' Okay, extended trial period. Okay, and then about… uh… them vouching for my housing benefits- Oh, by the way, I- my mom told me further about the… uh… financial aid situation back in the beginning of my [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|Piedmont]] days.

'''Kacey:''' Uh-huh.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, it’s like… yeah, we… they have… uh… there actually was a point in that, even during the [[stress]]… they actually tried… tried applying for the… we actually tried applying for the financial aid, but it was like, you know, we had more money… it was like, we had more money back then and we just did not qualify. We had more money then than we do nowadays.

'''Kacey:''' But, it goes off of income, so were they working?

'''Chris:''' Yeah, they were… my mom was working over at First North American National Bank back then. Then she retired a few years later.

'''Kacey:''' Your mom had to be working a lot for you to not even get student loans. I can’t see a reason you wouldn’t qualify, unless there was something wrong with the taxes or something like they weren’t being done correctly.

'''Chris:''' Well… yeah, there might… yep, probably, but I don’t know… I was… I was…

'''Kacey:''' Probably? I hope not. That’s tax fraud. You can get in so much trouble for that.

'''Chris:''' I don’t know all… I don’t claim to know all the information, I’m just… right now, I’m just going along with…

'''Kacey:''' That’s really weird though, because even if you couldn’t get financial aid, you should have been able to get student loans.

'''Chris:''' Hmm.

'''Kacey:''' Like, the government ones. You should have at least gotten something.

'''Chris:''' Yeah. Yeah, but… yeah, I think it’s just between the financial aid forms… student loans… yeah, we’ve…

'''Kacey:''' Maybe your parents just didn’t want to do them and that’s why they told you that. Cause that’s really strange, cause I mean… it… your mom would have had to be making sooooo so much money for you not to qualify.

'''Chris:''' [sighs] Well, I don’t know all the details. That was like over… that was about nine years ag… nine years ago. So, yeah, I can’t remember… I don’t remember all those details. They just kinda like, flew by, cause I was still in the midst of confusion , still recovering from a bad… from a bad [[graduation]]… and uhh… and the whole going to college, getting… starting getting used to that. It was stre- It was- those were stressful times.

'''Kacey:''' Well, I mean… that’s adulthood. W-what did you think being an adult was gonna be? I-it’s never gonna get better.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, and plus… a-also, I was eighteen.

'''Kacey:''' Yep. T-that would be an adult.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, well, I mean… yeah. You know, there are some… there are some places where it’s like, you know, they feel like fifteen, you’re an adult then. Some places say that.

'''Kacey:''' No. No. Where is that? [chuckles]

'''Chris:''' Yeah. I’m-I’m just…

'''Kacey:''' In America, that’s not true. [chuckles]

'''Chris:''' I mean-I mean, when I turned twenty-one, I definitely felt more like an adult, after I turned twenty-one, than I- than I did when I was eighteen, at any time.

'''Kacey:''' Well, just because you are an adult, doesn’t mean you feel like one. We’ve… discussed this before. But, seriously, where-where are people of age at sixteen? Where did you hear that from?

'''Chris:''' Oh, yeah. I was looking up… a while back I was looking up, like you know, “age of consent” and…

'''Kacey:''' Age of consent is not an adult thing, Chris!

'''Chris:''' Well…

'''Kacey:''' You’re still not an adult with age of consent. Age of consent is bullshit. If you’re under eighteen, people who are older than eighteen have no right to be with you or touching you or anything like that. You’re not mature enough.

'''Chris:''' [chuckles]

'''Kacey:''' Why were you looking up “age of consent?”

'''Chris:''' I don’t know. I was just making sure that… I-I don’t remember… ahh… Let me think. Let me think… mmm…

'''Kacey:''' Chris, that’s wrong! You…

'''Chris:''' [mutters incoherently]

'''Kacey:''' You weren’t… eighteen and trying to date a sixteen-year-old, were you?

'''Chris:''' No, no, no, no. I mean… but also, like, you know, in some states they don’t even say anything that’s like a few- a year or two over that… that would be the legal age of consent for that state. But, yeah, it was eighteen for [[Virginia]] and that’s what I wanted to learn anyway.

'''Kacey:''' So, since you think it’s okay, would you date a sixteen-year-old?

'''Chris:''' No. I would not date a sixteen-year-old.

'''Kacey:''' Then why were you looking up these laws?

'''Chris:''' I was looking up just for the state of Virginia and then I just happened to see all the other states along with it.

'''Kacey:''' Well, I mean… even right now, an eighteen-year-old would be too young for you.

'''Chris:''' At this point, yeah. An eighteen-year-old would be too young for me. I agree with you. [pause] I mean- I mean, I was- I was also in my early days when… I think this was like… yeah… looking that up, that was a few years ago, like… mid-[[sweetheart search]] at this point.

'''Kacey:''' Wait, so-so you were considering a- you know, someone’s “age-of-consent.” Chris, that’s… that’s [[pedofork|pedophilia]].

'''Chris:''' No, no, no, no, no, no, no. I was never considering sixteen, I swear, hand to God.

'''Kacey:''' Then why would you even be looking it up?

'''Chris:''' I was just… I was… I was just looking it up for Virginia, making sure eighteen was the age of consent.

'''Kacey:''' Eighteen is when you’re an adult. Age of consent has nothing to do with being an adult, like I said. Well, look, look. Like, how young would you go right now? What is [Chris sighs in the background] your ideal girlfriend a-age range?

'''Chris:''' Right now, my youngest right now- the youngest I would date would be twenty-one.

'''Kacey:''' That’s six years apart. Don’t you think that’s… I mean, I guess it could be worse, but don’t you want someone more… your speed?

'''Chris:''' Yeah, well, I don’t know what I want. I’m still a [[virgin with rage|virgin]]. I’m still learning.

'''Kacey:''' Dating does not equal sex. Just cause you’re a virgin doesn’t mean you can’t think of who you want to date. Are you serious? Do you think dating means you get to have sex?

'''Chris:''' Eventually. I’ve heard the- I’ve heard the rule of thumb though is, you know, like, after [[third date|date number three]], then…

'''Kacey:''' WHAT?! What?!

'''Chris:''' [unintelligible]…heard it on [[television]].

'''Kacey:''' [interrupting] You think, because a girl goes out with you three times she should have sex with you, like she’s obligated to? That’s… what… no-oo-oo! [breaks into laughter] If somebody did that to me, I’d smack them, and I’d call them a pervert. You have sex when you’re emotionally ready. That’s horrible. No, get that out of your head.

'''Chris:''' Okay, I’ll get that out of my head, but I’m just sayin’, that’s what I learned from television.

'''Kacey:''' You could have relationships and never have sex. You know that, right? Besides, you shouldn’t have sex until you know that… you could… I-I mean, you’ve gotta be sure about that person.

'''Chris:''' Yeah,I know. I’ve understoo- I understood that part.

'''Kacey:''' I mean, don’t you wanna love someone first?

'''Chris:''' Yeah, I do.

'''Kacey:''' I mean, where’d you get that from, like, TV or something?

'''Chris:''' Yeah, I told- yeah, I told ya… yeah, television. I’ve heard a lot of it from television, movies, whatever. That sort of thing.

'''Kacey:''' Like, which shows? Which television shows?

'''Chris:''' [noticeably frustrated] I… I don’t remember. I don’t remember. It was like- it was like comedies- you know, com-comedies or something like that.

'''Kacey:''' Okay, cause that should tell you: it’s a comedy. Comedies aren’t real. They’re meant to be funny an ironic. I-I can’t believe you thought that. So… ugh… Chris, what… no! [small chuckles] That-that’s just disrespectful to girls too. I mean… they don’t owe you anything, just cause you went on a date with them. You’re supposed to be there because you enjoy the pleasure of their company, and because you like them. Not because you think on the third date you’re gonna get some. Do you think about that? Do you… think about me like that?

'''Chris:''' No. I do not think of you like that. [pause]

'''Kacey:''' [sighs]

'''Chris:''' I mean, you definitely are genuine, you are sweet. I definitely would like to… b-be with you m-more often. But, it’s like, you know, I would not ask you unless you- unless you felt ready to.

'''Kacey:''' Still… Chris… you’re lying to me. You just told me that, it’s the third date and then… bam.

'''Chris:''' Eh, no. It was an idea. It was just a theory, and you know, theories are…

'''Kacey:''' That’s not a theory! [breaks into laughter] That’s a horrible theory!

'''Chris:''' Yeah, it is a horrible theory.

'''Kacey:''' I mean- I mean- but, you need to stop equating relationships with sex. Sex is sex. Relationships are… not. You can have sex without a relationship. You can have a relationship without sex. But, I mean, I really wouldn’t recommend the one-night-stand, sex-without-relationship thing, but, I mean… most people wait, like, a long time. Like, months time, or until they get married. [pause]

'''Chris:''' Waiting. Yeah. You know what- you know, these things bring up to my mind… you know… the fact that I’ve waited… I’ve been… it’s been like… over… it’s been, like, over six years now that I started the sweetheart search and, you know, even though…

'''Kacey:''' [interrupting] Well, you shouldn’t search for it, cause you know, when you’re not looking for things, things happen to fall into your lap like that.

'''Chris:''' Yeach, but the point is though, I waited a loooooooooooooooooooooooong time.

'''Kacey:''' Well, you know that God wants you to wait until you’re married? I mean, do you ever think about that? I mean, I think girls would find that admirable, if you were gonna wait ‘til marriage.

'''Chris:''' [sighs] Yeah, but it hurts.

'''Kacey:''' I-I-I… why would it hurt? I mean, you can have a relationship and companionship without sex. You don’t need sex. Sex is not going to make you feel better. If you are looking for sex to fill an emotional hole in yourself, you’re gonna be sorely disappointed. I-it’s just gonna make you feel worse.

'''Chris:''' Mmm… [pause]

'''Kacey:''' I mean, if all you want is that physical rush, just do it yourself.

'''Chris:''' Yeah… I’ve done it to... I-I’ve actually done it to myself so many… so many times, even with a… even with a hunk of… even with an [[Kimmi|inflatable, plastic wom…wom]]…

'''Kacey:''' Whoa, whoa, whoa! T-M-I! T-M-I!

'''Chris:''' Yeah, okay. Yeah, but anyway, [[Mass debating|I’ve done it so much]], it’s like, you know… I can’t even feel that much of a rush from it, doing it to myself like that.

'''Kacey:''' Well, maybe that… is… part of your sexual drive. I mean, you should feel pleasure from it.

'''Chris:''' I did for a long time and then… I don’t know. It’s like, you know, my body got used to it.

'''Kacey:''' So you feel nothing now?

'''Chris:''' No, I- No, I do- I do feel it, like you know, when I’m near a woman, I definitely feel it then. And sometimes…

'''Kacey:''' [interrupting] “Near a woman?” I thought you were a virgin.

'''Chris:''' [clearly frustrated] I am a virgin! I’ve never had sex!

'''Kacey:''' Okay then, what-what do you mean by “near a woman?” I mean, obviously, I don’t think you mean you do that near… a woman.

'''Chris:''' No, no, no. I meant- I meant- [stutters “I meant” several more times] Oh, oh crap! [yelling] I don’t even know what I’m talking about anymore! [exhales]

'''Kacey:''' Okay, just calm down. I mean, don’t raise your voiced at me. [chuckles] We should be adults and be able to have a civil conversation about this.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, well, I mean… I gave you respect though. I moved the phone away from my head when I shouted.

'''Kacey:''' I appreciate it.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, but I’m just sayin’, I just felt- I just felt under pressure. And considering the social anxi- considering the socialness and…

'''Kacey:''' Well, I thought you were comfortable with me.

'''Chris:''' I am comfortable with you, but I’m just sayin’, like you know during a long time where I didn’t- where it was just me and I was just lurching toward a woman[?] or any woman who was willing to give…

'''Kacey:''' I think maybe you’re holding that to a standard that you’re never gonna be able to accomplish, like… I think that you’re holding it to a standard to where, if you actually get it, you’re going to be disappointed. I-I mean, y-you need to lower the bar a little bit. I mean, maybe you need some friends. Maybe you just need to get out there more. Maybe join a singles’ group or something.

'''Chris:''' I-I’m not even sure if- I’m not even sure if that would be good for me, or waitaminute… Maybe I messed up. I don’t know. [pause] [[slow-in-the-mind|I feel confused]].

'''Kacey:''' Well, you know, being confused is nothing to be ashamed of.

'''Chris:''' [sighs] Yeah, stress and confusion are a bad combination.

'''Kacey:''' I guess, but you need to be able to keep them in check and to get through them. That’s part of being an adult is pushing through everything, cause you’re gonna be stressed, you’re gonna be confused. It’s gonna happen, but what’s gonna matter is what you do to push through that.

'''Chris:''' Yeah. [pause]

'''Kacey:''' But, I mean yeah, like sex isn’t going… to… solve all your problems. It’s just not. It’s not gonna make everything magically better. In fact, sex opens so many doors, it can cause problems, especially emotional problems. I mean, cause then you’re… that’s as involved as you can get with somebody and if you’re not ready for it, it’s going to cause a lot of shit. Like, don’t you think I wish I had waited now? I mean, look at everything that’s happened to me. I wish I waited.

'''Chris:''' Well, you know, I’ve heard… uh… I’ve heard in places where… you know, if you… I’m sure if you talk to your church- your pastor at your church… uh… I think there’s…

'''Kacey:''' [interrupting] Chris. Chris. I know you’re talking about Born Again Virgins. That’s a load of bullshit. That’s- that’s trendy teen shit that they do to make you feel better, but it doesn’t erase the fact that you’ve done it. I’m sorry. You’re gonna have to keep that between you and God. But, I mean, just because…

'''Chris:''' Okay, it’s just, I heard that on television is all. I remember hearing it on an episode of [[Adult Swim#King of the Hill|King of the Hill]]. I’m just throwing it out there.

'''Kacey:''' Once again, Chris, that’s a comedy a TV… you can’t… they were fun of it. They were making fun of people who think Born Again Virgins really makes them pure. No. You still did it. That’s still your mistake and you’re gonna have those emotional scars all your life… or the memories, even. I mean… it doesn’t… make you… anything. You’re still you.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Kacey:''' I mean, if you’re not having fun, even, you know, doing it yourself, maybe sex isn’t for you right now. Maybe you just need companionship. I think you’re confusing sex with companionship.

'''Chris:''' Ugh… so many things I’m confusing. You know, [unintelligible] I used to confuse Michael Jordan with Michael Jackson.

'''Kacey:''' Okay, that’s weird, but I don’t know what that has to do with this situation. You shouldn’t keep changing the subject like that.

'''Chris:''' I know. I’m just saying, you know, talking about confusion. I’m just saying, I’ve confused things before.

'''Kacey:''' Okay.

'''Chris:''' Confused people before.

'''Kacey:''' Okay, but that’s a little… that’s a little different than this. This is confusing… um… terms and… ideas, like… I-I don’t know. Just- I think what you need is companionship and friends. I mean, your putting sex on this pedestal and people who do that get sorely disappointed. And, I mean, what happens if you do it and then you- you regret it? Y-you should definitely wait until you find someone that you know. That you absolutely know. And it’s not gonna be on the third date. [pause]

'''Chris:''' [pause] Yeah.

'''Kacey:''' I mean, you’ve even said it’s not fun. I mean, maybe deep down, what you want isn’t sexual-type fun, just, you know, being with other people.

'''Chris:''' Uh… let me rewind- let me rewind on that topic. Um… actually, lately I have rea- I have been actually been able to enjoy it… you know, [[mass debating|masturbation]]. I’ve actually been able to enjoy it, because you know, I’ve actually had a girl to put in my head… in my head to fantasize doin’ that with. For a long time I have been doin’ it, you know, where I did not have a woman to fantasize that with. And then eventu- and then eventually that wind out to be no fun. And then… and actually, you know… uh… yeah. Then-then I start talking to [[trolls|girls on the internet]]. And then, you know, from the pictures they sent me, that starts to get a little more fun and then they wind out. Then I got no fun and it was like a yo-yo thing.

'''Kacey:''' Maybe that’s your body’s way of saying that you’re just being lustful, and that that’s why it stops being fun, because there’s no emotional… there’s nothing emotional about it. Like, sex should just be physical. It should be emotional and physical.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, but I actually did feel emotions for those girls… b-before they left me or I found out they were trolls.

'''Kacey:''' Well, I-I can’t help you with that. You’ve gotta be more careful with that. But, I mean…

'''Chris:''' Yeah, I’ve learned from- I’ve learned from my past. I’ve learned from my mistakes.

'''Kacey:''' But, I mean- I mean, if I guess you do it now, if you have someone you think of now, are you emotionally attached to that person?

'''Chris:''' Yes, I can honestly say I do feel emotionally attached.

'''Kacey:''' Okay. [pause] Well, maybe you should concentrate on being that person’s… friend… and, you know, getting to know them.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Kacey:''' I mean, you can’t just go straight to that. I mean, I happy it’s working out for you. That’s good. That’s a good sign. But, it shouldn’t be all about that.

'''Chris:''' I understand, and I will con- and I will continue to think about… yeah. Maintaining friendship, and then let it all come.

'''Kacey:''' But, what happens if it never comes?

'''Chris:''' Then I guess it just doesn’t. I mean, it just- that depends upon… uh… my friend, who’s been like an angel to me feels at that time. [pause]

'''Kacey:''' Yeah, I mean- I mean, that’s it, but I mean, you’ve gotta be prepared. I mean… I don’t know. Just, you know. Just, this isn’t the way to go about it.

'''Chris:''' Yeah. I-I hear you. [pause] I hear you and I appreciate it- I appreciate it all.

'''Kacey:''' [chuckles] You’re welcome.

'''Chris:''' The guidance.

'''Kacey:''' Well, I just want what’s best for you.

'''Chris:''' Thank you.

'''Kacey:''' I mean, you’re a great friend and I hope nothing changes.

'''Chris:''' Hmm… hmm… yeah, thank you. You have been like an angel to me.

'''Kacey:''' Um… okay. Uh… cool. [chuckles] Um…

'''Chris:''' I mean, your guidance and all, it’s just like, you know, yeah. It’s like that what a guardian angel would… g-guide you through.

'''Kacey:''' Well- well, that’s gonna be my job. I’m gonna be a nurse. I’m gonna be helping people. So, you know, that’s just what I do. I would do it for anyone.

'''Chris:''' [dejected] That’s good. Mmm…

'''Kacey:''' Well, anyway, it’s getting late, and I have school, so… um… why don’t I let you go, and I’ll talk to you tomorrow?

'''Chris:''' Okay, you’ll send me the email with the links to all the recipes and all that?

'''Kacey:''' Yeah, I’ll try to redo it. If not, I‘ll do it after school tomorrow.

'''Chris:''' Okay. Uh… talk to you later… Kacey.

'''Kacey:''' Okay, talk to you later, Chris. Bye!

'''Chris:''' Bye-bye.

'''[CALL ENDS]'''

==External links==
[http://www.4shared.com/mp3/F61jxxuIce/Kacey_Call_07.html MP3 Phone Call]

{{succession|label=[[Kacey_calls|Kacey Phone Calls]]|prevlink=[[Kacey Call 6]]|nextlink=[[Kacey Call 8]]}}

{{FanChats}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Kacey Call 07}}
[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Phone calls]]
[[Category:Liquid Saga]]

Christian's Update 13 September 2008

2026-05-08T23:45:07Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

'''Christian's Update 13 September 2008''' (officially '''Christian's Update Sept. 13, 2008''') is an update video [[Chris]] uploaded to [[YouTube]] on 13 [[September 2008]].

Recovering from the [[Captain's Log, Stardate September 11th, 2008|uploading of his nude photos on ED]], Chris insists that [[Blanca]] is real, and therefore was not responsible for tricking him. (He is, of course, half right. The [[troll]] who leaked the nudes wasn't Blanca, but Blanca was still, in fact, a troll.)

Chris goes on to inform his [[TRUE and LOYAL fanbase]] of bootleg ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' merchandise sold by [[Jimmy Hill]], and calls for a boycott. He also gives an update on the progress of the [[Sonichu (game)|''Sonichu'' video game]], as the project is currently on hold due to [[JK Productions]] being another group of trolls playing a prank on him. Chris reiterates his call for all Sonichu fans to pressure [[Miyamoto|Nintendo]] and Sega to work with Chris to make the ''Sonichu'' game.

Chris [[Speech impediment|stutters all over the place]] in this video, making his words and phrases very hard to understand. Also, at the very end, Chris's cell phone is heard ringing with a MIDI version of [[Britney Spears]]' "[[Feel So Lonesome|(You Drive Me) Crazy]]" as its ringtone.

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = Christian's Update Sept. 13, 2008
| ytid = JoTNBMcqDnY
| stardate = 13 [[September 2008]]
| subject = {{Galpals|text}}; {{Rumors|text}}; {{Video games|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}
| saga = {{Blanca|text}}; {{Hill|text}}
| shirt = {{JerkopShirt|text}}
| previous = [[Chando Sings!]]
| next = [[Chris_Chan_Update_24_September_2008#Video|Chris Chan Update September 24, 2008]]
}}

{{quote|Blanca’s real. I talked to her.}}

=== Transcript ===

September 13, [[2008]]. Update.

Eh, y'know, I've gotten over the mess! It's all settled now.

[[Blanca]]’s real. I talked to her. [''his eyes briefly widen to the proportions of a caricature of a psychotic''] Yeah, she called me. So, as for the, uh, person who--as for the [[jerk]] who, uh, posed...with the, a--“KawaiiKitsune” name? If I knew who you were, I'd give you a kick in the bawls. But I can't, because I don't know who or where you are. '''Buh bye bay nose...''' the whereabouts of the...''jerk''...and just happens to be nearby, or within the state? Give him a swick kick for me.

Anyway, as for--anyway, I'm happy now. I'm happy. So, uh, thank y'all for your emotional support, those of y'all who sent me e-mails and messages. Alright. So, onto, uh, other pressing issues. Yeah.

The--first off, the, uh, toys in the UK: they're definitely, uh, fake. I have never approved any merchandise or distribution of such [''pronounces this like “search”''] merchandise yet. So, therefore, the advertisements of such, uh, Sonichu merchandise...in the UK? All fake. Uhhh...possibly, this guy named, uh... “[[Jimmy Hill|Jerry... ''Hill'']]” I think his name was? But...I mean, uh, that's, uh, from a suggestion from--uh, from--uh, that's a name I got from--uh, one of--from--uh, one- from one of my fans.

Yeah. So, uh, you know, his initials are “JH”. If y--I'm sure y'all have heard about him, uh... the g--the--uh, the g--the, uh, person who told me about, uh, this-- told me about, uh, “JH”... also, apparently, sold fake stuff for Warner Bros., and, uh, they sued him...and they ''arrested'' him, so, apparently...he ''could'' be the one that's, uh...trying to make a...f--f--fast buck off of...fake merchandise. Alright.

So, uh, anyway...boycott th--buying such--buying those-- buyin’ the merchandise from the UK...buying ''any'' merchandise from there. Boycott it! Don't do it.

As for the, uh, game--uh, as for the, uh, video game...yeah, that's, uh, tempor--that’s temporary on pause, because apparently, “JK Productions”...they were a fake company, as I received an e-mail from the, uh, prankster behind that--behind that, uh...pull of the leg. Him confessing. So, uh, anyway, it's temporary on pause, so...all my fans: talk to Nin--t--tend--talk to [[Nintendo]]. Talk to Sega! Tell 'em to come talk to me! I wanna get Sonich--get the Sonichu game idea...up in the air with--between Nintendo and Sega.

So...yeah. That basically covers the, uh, topics of, uh, interest for now. So, uh... [''cell phone starts ringing with a “[[Feel So Lonesome|(You Drive Me) Crazy]]” ringtone''] you know who I am. I'll talk to y--I'll, uh, give another update when I feel like it. Peace out.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Chando Sings!]]|nextlink=[[Chris Chan Update 24 September 2008]]|}}

{{Captain's Log}}

[[Category:Captain's log entries| 2008-09-13]]

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, September 2008| 13]]
[[Category:Jimmy Hill Saga videos| 2008-09-13]]
[[Category:Blanca Saga videos| 2008-09-13]]
[[Category:PSEye videos|2008-09-13]]
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]
[[Category:Videos published to Sonichu]]

Star Wars

2026-05-04T22:44:21Z

FromtheWordsofBR: /* References by Chris */

{{quote|[[Rape]] yourselves with your own Damn Darth Maul Dual LightSabre|Chris to [[Clyde Cash]] and [[Surfshack Tito]]<ref>[[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails]]</ref>}}
[[File:Star wars.jpg|thumb|300px|Remember Chris, the [[autism]] will be with you – always.]]
[[File:ChrisNass.png|thumb|left|300px|Coincidence? I think not!]]

'''''Star Wars''''' is a film and media franchise created by {{w|George Lucas}} and produced his company Lucasfilm. It begun with 1977's ''Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope'', which was released to critical and commercial acclaim and is now considered to be one of the best movies of all-time. The popularity of the first installment lead to two more sequels, 1980's ''Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back'', and 1983's ''Episode VI: Return of the Jedi''. The franchise is now a cultural icon, and has spawned legions of parodies, and book and television companions, as well as a prequel trilogy, consisting of 1999's ''Episode I: The Phantom Menace'', 2002's ''Episode II: Attack of the Clones'', and 2005's ''Episode III: Revenge of the Sith'', and a sequel trilogy, made up of 2015's ''Episode VII: The Force Awakens'', 2017's ''Episode VIII: The Last Jedi'', and 2019's ''Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker'', as well as a handful of spin-off films and television projects like 2016's ''Rogue One'', 2018's ''Solo'', and 2019's ''The Mandalorian''.

[[Chris]] has mentioned on more than one occasion that he likes the franchise, and has [[Things Chris has ripped off|taken influence from it]] on certain occasions. The earliest known references he's made to it are in his [[Mario Kart 64 Lego Raceway|Lego Game Boy Camera videos]], around the time that ''The Phantom Menace'' was being hyped up in [[1999]] (though the video states it was from [[1998]]). He particularly likes the character Ahsoka Tano, who was first introduced in the 2008 animated series ''The Clone Wars''.

==References by Chris==
[[File:Starwarsday.png|thumb|200px|left|Chris wearing an {{w|Ahsoka Tano}} hat.]]
[[File:Screen Shot 2016-04-28 at 9.20.26 PM.png|thumb|right|300px|Chris' ''Star Wars'' self. Zabrak are known for being [[Chris and his ego|arrogant and prideful]], quite fitting for Chris.]]
[[File:Screen Shot 2016-04-28 at 9.21.01 PM.png|thumb|right|300px|Ditto, but [[Transgender|female]]. Note that Chris's choice of last name for either character implies that he thinks that {{w|Lando Calrissian}} is at least part-Zabrak instead of fully-human.]]

* {{w|Luke Skywalker}} competes in [[Mario Kart 64 Lego Raceway]] and fights {{w|Darth Maul}}. In addition, other ''Star Wars'' characters like a "{{w|Darth Vader|Vader}} {{w|Droid (robot)|Droid}}", Anakin Skywalker, and {{w|R2-D2}} show up as well.
* In the [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|FUTURE MESSAGE]], Chris referred to [[Tobacky|cigarettes]] as "death sticks," a [[CWC-ism|childish euphemism]] borrowed from one of the sillier scenes in ''Attack of the Clones'', specifically the one that spawned the "You don't want to sell me death sticks" meme. Unfortunately, unlike the drug dealer in the movie, Chris would not [[14 Branchland Court|go home]] and [[Chris and reality|rethink his life]].
* In [[IRC]], Chris told trolls ''"I've enjoyed 5/6 Episodes, and Clone Wars; didn't see EP3 yet''<ref>[[IRC (22 December 2008)]]</ref> and that ''Episode IV'' is his favorite film in the series.<ref>[[IRC_(28_December_2008)]]</ref>
* Chris once mentioned watching "Blue Harvest", the first part of ''Family Guy'''s trilogy of ''Star Wars'' parodies (which Lucasfilm themselves approved and had involvement in). He has likely seen the other two episodes as well.
* He owns five ''Star Wars'' [[games]] and several [[toys]].
* In [[Julie Reveals Herself]], [[Max]] does a {{w|Chewbacca}} impression, which Chris responds to with one of his own, arguably even worse than his [[Donald Duck impersonation]].
* When Chris was [[It's UGH!|forced to sing "OK2BGay"]], he originally sang it in a voice not unlike Yoda. Whether he was intentionally impersonating him or not is unknown, but for his standards it's surprisingly accurate.
* Chris [[List of Chris's PSN game downloads|downloaded]] Yoda for [[Soul Calibur|''Soulcalibur 4'']].
* He used [[Thorg]]'s love of Star Wars as [[Chris and hypocrisy|evidence of his nerdiness]].<ref>[[Exposed - Jeremy Slonwhite of Vancouver, BC Canada]]</ref>
* He told [[Clyde]] and [[Surfshack Tito (troll)|Surfshack Tito]] ''"You both want me to even Beg, you can go point at your own damn snouts and Oink like [[South Park|Eric Cartman]], and then Rape yourselves with your own Damn Darth Maul Dual LightSabre."''<ref>[[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails]]</ref>
* [[Wild Sonichu]]'s proposed backstory is an admitted Star Wars ripoff:
{{Quote|Wild Sonichu's story is of after he loses his father to some [[Pokémon|Pok'emon]] poachers (possibly of [[Team Rocket]] and [[Giovanni]]), and years later, he hears the call of his father from afar, and he sets forward to find and rescue him. The ending being he finds his Scyther father evolved to a Scizor, and it draws into a plot similar to that in Star Wars between Luke and Vader.|Chris<ref>[[Jackie_E-mails]]</ref>}}
* In the [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'' comics]], Jason Kendrick Howell's throne appears to bear resemblance to the Emperor's throne in ''Return of the Jedi''.
* {{w|Ahsoka Tano}} is shown gossiping with "Zack, the That's-What-She-Said [[JERKS|Douchebag]]" in [[CWC Lego Manchester High School Oct 18 2013]].
* In [[2021]], Chris [[May 2021 social media posts#May The Fourth Be With You|commemorated the franchise]] on [[Twitter]] on 4 May (dubbed ''Star Wars'' Day by fans due to the obvious "May the Fourth be with you" pun, rather than to commemorate the release date of the original film).
* At the [[Animate! Raleigh]] convention in [[January 2024]], Chris [[cosplay]]ed as ''Star Wars'' character Ahsoka.

==References==
<references/>

{{Articleofthenow}}
{{TV}}
[[Category:Things Chris has ripped off]]

Kacey Call 24

2026-05-04T01:15:52Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

'''Kacey Call 24''' is the twenty-fourth of the [[Kacey Calls|phone calls]] between [[Kacey]] and Solid [[Chris]], taking place in [[October 2009]]. A wide range of topics such as Barb being sick, job hunting at Target, cleaning his room, Kacey allowing her gay friends to touch her boobs, Chris's sexuality were discussed.

==Summary==
*[[Chris]] says that his [[mom]] had [[9 October 2009|food poisoning]], so they went to a doctor and found out that it wasn't food poisoning. So they went back to the restaurant to complain anyways.
*Chris is amazed that families and friends of cancer patients will shave their heads to support the person with cancer.
*Kacey asks about Chris's [[room]] getting cleaned. Chris is "still working on it!", but [[Kim]] suggested that Chris take his [[Lego]] city apart. Kacey asks for pictures. Chris will think about it.
*Chris is still trying to get a job at [[Target]], but has applied to two other stores.
*Chris was talking to a girl named Regina, the girl whose father bought Chris's two ''[[Guitar Hero]]'' [[guitar]]s. Chris went to meet her, and she didn't show up.
*Chris talks about the [[Emily]] date, and claims that the ''man in the pickle suit'''s name is Harold.
*Chris talks about the [[PVCC]] trolling him, and Kacey says that such an organization doesn't exist and he just thinks too much of himself. Chris says they do it for the L-U-L-Z (spells it out).
*Chris [[Chris and his ego|gets stressed out]] when Kacey says that he's not important enough to spend that much effort on.
*Chris claims that he gets lots of emails from men asking him on dates. Kacey says that's a compliment, and he doesn't come off as straight. This makes Chris yell in a high pitched voice: "OH JESUS CHRIST! I'M STRAIGHT! WHAT THE HELL!"
*'''Kacey says it's common sense to not reply to trolls. Chris says "Let me tell you about common sense," and says that he had sex with a FEMALE BLOW UP DOLL, not a male blow up doll, so it's obvious that he's straight!'''
*Kacey says that Chris should just be bisexual. Chris yells "I HATE LOOKING AT PENISES!"
*Kacey says she has [[gay]] friends who regularly grab her boobs and she doesn't mind.
*Kacey tells Chris to stop sighing because it makes him sound like a baby. Also to stop saying "whatever." He sighs several times while Kacey talks.
*Chris asks what Kacey wants to talk about, and Kacey says she doesn't care unless Chris can tutor her in her Statistics class. Chris says that he's really good at it and that he can help her with it.

==Video==
{{Tardrage|1=border:4px solid #FF1493|2=[[Homos|flamboyant]]}}
<center>
{{Infobox/Audiofile
| name = Kacey Call 24
| audio = {{#ev:youtube|e_sD9CXBaX4}}
| Stardate = [[October 2009]]
| Featuring = [[Chris]]; [[Kacey]]
| Saga = {{Liquid}} Liquid Saga
| previous = [[Kacey Call 23]]
| next = [[Father Call]]
}} </center>

'''Chris:''' Hello?

'''Kacey:''' Hey Chris, it's Kacey.

'''Chris:''' Hi Kacey, how are you?

'''Kacey:''' I'm good, just a little tired.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, I got to agree.

'''Kacey:''' So how are you?

'''Chris:''' Yeah, I'm fair myself. I just uh, read your email. Did you read my reply I sent back to you?

'''Kacey:''' Yeah, actually, I did.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, pretty much in a nutshell, that's what's been happening lately.

'''Kacey:''' Um, that sucks about [[Barb|your mom]], I give my condolences, I hope she feels better. But, um... how did they know that she had food poisoning?

'''Chris:''' Yeah, I mean, that my, that was [[Bob|my father]] and mine's theory at first, but then you know, we took her to Martha Jefferson, then, and then the doctors classified... classified the ailment as colitis.

'''Kacey:''' Oh, well that's definitely not food poisoning.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, I mean well-

'''Kacey:''' You guys shouldn't have gone back there to talk to them then, 'cause it's obviously not them...

'''Chris:''' Hm. Yeah, well, I mean, still. Uh, you know, my mom, after today... she was having gut pains, and... yeah, she was like, "Yeah, take the uh, there's the uh, majority of the food I left behind, I had but I had not eaten, so you know, you just take it back to them, and uh, tell 'em what happened." She was like, you know, um, my father and I, we just like, you know, we couldn't do much to respond, you know....Mom was... all up, all up on top of the world here kind of, you know? Uh...

'''Kacey:''' How long ago did it happen? I mean, did either of you eat it and get sick from it too?

'''Chris:''' Uh, no, my father and I did not eat it.

'''Kacey:''' Besides, if she has colitis she shouldn't be eating food like that. You said it was Chinese, right? I mean, that food's loaded with MSG and salt and fat, that's like the worst thing she could be doing right now.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, well I mean, I mean, none of us knew about the colitis yet. So...

'''Kacey:''' But still, it's definitely not food poisoning, it's her body telling her what she's eating is wrong. Like did she get put on a diet?

'''Chris:''' Yeah, she can't eat much, uh, [[Recycling|salty]] or sugary foods, or drinks, now.

'''Kacey:''' No, definitely not. Is she sticking to it?

'''Chris:''' Yeah, she's, yeah, she just got started on it.

'''Kacey:''' So then what type of things is she eating?

'''Chris:''' Uh, you know, just basically, um... I'd say, mostly, um... fruits and vegetables...Um, I'm not sure what else at the time-

'''Kacey:''' Well, fruits and vegetables are high in sugar.

'''Chris:''' Hm. Well-

'''Kacey:''' Maybe you should join her in her diet to support her, it could be good for you.

'''Chris:''' Hm, alright well, I'm not sure, I'm not really sure of, uh, of her diet. But, uh, you know, I can, I can like, you know... um... I can have her tell me more about it. But right now-

'''Kacey:''' You should, I mean it's good. You know cancer patients, their whole family shaves their heads, I mean you should totally do it, so that, number one, it'll help you get healthier; number two, it'll help your mom that you're there for her.

'''Chris:''' Wait wait wait wait wait... Cancer, families of cancer patients actually shave their heads?

'''Kacey:''' Yeah, it's a show of soli-, you know, togetherness? When the cancer patient goes into chemo and loses their hair, a lot of family members will do that, you know, to show that they're all together in this.

'''Chris:''' Oh.

'''Kacey:''' It's pretty inspirational.

'''Chris:''' Huh.

'''Kacey:''' I mean, and all you would have to do is diet.

'''Chris:''' Yeah. Yeah...alright. Yeah, well. Yeah, I'll talk to my mom about uh, this diet she's on and uh... I'll see if I can get on that as well. But anyway-

'''Kacey:''' You totally should.

'''Chris:''' Yeah. I, yeah. But right now she's, right now she's sleeping. But still you know, I'll talk to her next time she's awake. About that.

'''Kacey:''' Definitely, I think that would be good for you.

'''Chris:''' [''sigh'']

'''Kacey:''' How is [[Chris's room|your room]] coming along?

'''Chris:''' Yeah. I'm still working on it, uh...I, uh...Kim and I agreed that, uh...yeah, Kim convinced me that, you know, I'm planning on uh, taking my city, my [[Lego]] [[CWCville|city]] apart, piece by piece, and putting the pieces into, into buckets.

'''Kacey:''' Oh, that's a good idea.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, so I'm gonna start on that, I'm gonna start on that soon enough. But, you know-

'''Kacey:''' You should take some more pictures and send them to me along with progress, you should probably do it like every other day. I mean, 'cause you were supposed to have this done, I mean how much longer do you think it's gonna take?

'''Chris:''' [''Pause''] Yeah, it'll take me a while longer, plus you know, recent, plus you know, last weekend I had to worry about my mom being in the, being in the hospital.

'''Kacey:''' Right.

'''Chris:''' So...

'''Kacey:''' But you should still push yourself to do it, it'll probably make your mom feel better too.

'''Chris:''' Yeah well, yeah, I, yeah, I'm going to work on that this week. On that-

'''Kacey:''' Awesome, don't forget to send me pictures, give me something to get my mind of everything too.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, OK. Alright. Hm... Yeah, I'm sorry to hear about you possibly losing your job and failing in class, what happened?

'''Kacey:''' Um, well we have a new manager, and he's just a jerk, and he wants his own people in there, and class, well, I've just been having issues with it, and being able to get to the class, so it's something I can recover, you know, I've just had a lot going on. Especially with work and everything, 'cause sometimes I've had to pick up during the class, and it's just one big mess, but I'm working to fix it and I might have a new job soon.

'''Chris:''' OK. well, I hope uh... I hope that, you know, at your next job, you'll be successful. Or like, you know, um... you know, that you'll have it. Hm. Yeah, 'cause I would hate to see you without a job at this point. [''Pause''] Oh, by the way I still have, by the way, apparently, uh... it's like, you know, I have, um... yeah, I have not heard back from [[Target]], and I called them like, you know, I think it was, yeah, the last... the weekend before this recent weekend. And, I have not heard back. So, it's like, I think it's pretty obvious at this point I did not get a job there, but I'm submitting applications for, uh, places like uh, Barnes & Noble and Sears, even a new CVS that's being built in [[Ruckersville]].

'''Kacey:''' Hm. Have you heard back from anywhere?

'''Chris:''' No, not yet. But I, but I, like you know, I'm planning on, I'm planning on checking in with them to see if they got my applications.

'''Kacey:''' Definitely.

'''Chris:''' 'Cause I had to go online to do the applications. For these places. As well. [Pause] Hm. Yeah. Yeah... but upon, yeah, let me go, let me go off topic here a bit, uh... Yeah, about uh, [[Regina]], the girl I was just telling you about, that uh...

'''Kacey:''' Right.

'''Chris:''' ...whose father I sold two guitars to on [[eBay]]. Yeah, I mean like, we were, it was like you know, we were getting along...great, you know. I've been mostly telling her about the pos-, about my positive characteristics. Not one, not once mentioning the, uh, trolls or names like [[Gregg Mays]] and whatever. And then, uh... and then... you know like, we had the pick-up time scheduled, you know, uh... but, today at two o'clock at the, uh, [[McDonald's]] on Barracks Road... but then she doesn't show up, but then I come home and I find the e-mail and it's like, "Oh I get the, oh, I got the, oh, I was intercepted by Gregg Mays and he had two, and he had two guitars, with no paint, with all paint and stickers removed." And so, he charged her half price for it. And it was like you know, she thinks as if she still bought it from me, or she's giving off that impression, but... Uhh, but yeah, I'm thinking basically I got troll-, I got trolled again. And like you know-

'''Kacey:''' Well it sounds like she got trolled too.

'''Chris:''' Yeah, or like you, yeah or like you know, like she's one of the, she's one them, just like, uh...the past time at [[Charlottesville Fashion Square|the mall]], I think her name was [[Emily]]. And then we were, and then, uh, being intercepted by Harold, that [[Man in the Pickle Suit|guy in the pickle suit]]. Uh... and I think, uh, I think, you know, [[Kim]] could tell you more about that, you know, there are audio files, you know, that girl had a wire on her. And the, uh, audio-

'''Kacey:''' How do you know she had a wire on?

'''Chris:''' [annoyed sigh] Because, the, I found the audio file later, on the, uh... [[Miscreants]] webpage that was originally created by [[Clyde Cash]]-slash-[[Gregg Mays]].

'''Kacey:''' Hmm.

'''Chris:''' Yeah. Uh, but anyway, then Kim, then I talked to Kim about it and she convinces me like, you know, Regina could be just, uh, an innocent victim and it's just a whole bunch of misunderstandings and whatnot. So...

'''Kacey:''' It probably is, Chris, I mean it's not like the whole world's against you. You really don't think that, do you?

'''Chris:''' Hm. No...I don't think think ''the whole world'' is against me, just some, it's just some of the people, it's just the whole buncha people out of a whole, out of a big vast majority.

'''Kacey:''' You really think there's a group devoted to trolling you?

'''Chris:''' Yeah, Kim can tell you about that, there's forums and everything.

'''Kacey:''' Why? I mean, why would a group of people devote themselves to you? I mean, have you ever done anything wrong?

'''Chris:''' [getting more stressed and whiny] I had originally done nothing wrong! As far as I, as far as I know, I-

'''Kacey:''' But then, why would they be devoted to trolling you?

'''Chris:''' I don't know why! I don't know why they started...[Sigh] I don't even know why that, why the [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] page got started in the first place. I mean, I mean, other than the fact that they were doing it for the... L-U-L-Z]].

'''Kacey:''' The what?

'''Chris:''' L-U-L-Z. You know, they call it "LULZ". Or like, you know-

'''Kacey:''' So... they're doing it for laughs? I doubt there is a group dedicated to trolling you just because it's fun.

'''Chris:''' [''Sigh'']

'''Kacey:''' I mean, are you telling the truth?

'''Chris:''' Yeah I-

'''Kacey:''' I mean are you sure you didn't do anything to any of them? I think we've talked about this before.

'''Chris:''' I am telling, I am telling you the truth. I am telling you the truth, Kacey. I swear to [[God]]. And Kim can back you up on that, she can tell you about these forums. And whatnot.

'''Kacey:''' That weird though, that's really weird, I mean are you really that important?

'''Chris:''' [offended sigh] Hm. Well, I'm internet famous. Uh, for one thing, but, I don't think I would be THAT important, I mean, the way these trolls keep carrying on they make it like I'm as, I'm as important or more important than [[Britney Spears]]! [Pause] Jeez...[Sigh] What a mess that, what a mess the whole trolling thing is. [Sigh] But, I just take it one step at a time, you know, and I'm block-, and I'm continuing to uh, block any naysayers, that send me negative e-mails. On my, on my, on my AOL address.

'''Kacey:''' Hm. That's good.

'''Chris:''' Yeah.

'''Kacey:''' I mean, what do you consider a negative e-mail?

'''Chris:''' Well like you know, people... I- for one thing, here's a... I'm giving you, like, maybe one or two examples of the top of my head upon recollection... Um, one thing is like, you know, the inclination of people... mislabeling me as a [[homosexual]], or... dudes asking me out on a homosexual date, or making me, or asking me to do anything homosexual when I'm not, and it's pretty hard for me to-

'''Kacey:''' You should take that as a compliment! I mean, maybe you're giving off the wrong impression to them.

'''Chris:''' [stunned] What, come on, I mean-

'''Kacey:''' I mean, you might be attracting these gay people.

'''Chris:''' [disgusted sigh] But anyway, I'm STRAIGHT. But, you know-

'''Kacey:''' Well, maybe people don't think that, maybe you're not coming off as that. You ever think about that?

'''Chris:''' Ugh, come on you know me, I'm- You know I'm straight. And- [stammering incoherently]

'''Kacey:''' But THEY don't.

'''Chris:''' [getting angrier] Ugh, I've been telling them, I've been telling them NUMEROUS TIMES now in the [[YouTube]] videos that I'm straight!

'''Kacey:''' Maybe they think you're just being shy.

'''Chris:''' Ahh, THEY'RE STUPID! I, I mean, I even, I even reflected so much about my, uh, about my, uh, how I feel about the homosexuals, I just don't... care that much about them, I just don't wanna get too close to them...

'''Kacey:''' Well, Chris, remember that usually when you protest too much, [Chris sighs] then it usually is true.

'''Chris:''' Oh, JESUS CHRIST!

'''Kacey:''' They just think you're in the closet. I mean, you...

'''Chris:''' I'M STRAIGHT!!! I'm straight!

'''Kacey:''' Chris, but you make so many videos about NOT being straight, I mean, it actually HURTS you. Like, if you just let it go...

'''Chris:''' Wait, wait, time out, time out, wait. Making videos about me NOT being straight, what the HELL?

'''Kacey:''' No, about BEING STRAIGHT, it hurts you because they're like, "Oh, he's just covering it up."

'''Chris:''' Oh, Jesus...[Sigh]

'''Kacey:''' I mean you should just ignore it.

'''Chris:''' [Chris sighs and tries to change the subject] Ah, whatever, but anyway like I, like I said, I add the, I add those names, I add those people, those are... The subject of those people who send me such e-mails, I add to my block list. That's uh, one thing. Another thing is like you know... like you know, or like you know, they just tell me like you know, "Fuck you," or "You're a failure," or any negative comments like that, I add them to the block list as well. Or even more recently like you know, oh shh-, you know, yeah, "We're continuing the talks about your [[copyright]] being stolen," that's just a false rumor and it's not been stolen. I recovered that e-mail. So like you know, I add them to the block list as well. I don't even have to open the e-mail, it's ob-, it say-, they just say it in the subject line. [''Pause''] Yeah. Anyway, yeah those, those are some of the examples of uh, people, uh, who I add to the block list.

'''Kacey:''' Chris, why does being called gay make you so angry anyway? I mean if it's not true it just shouldn't hurt you at all.

'''Chris:''' Because it's a mislabeling! I hate being mislabeled!

'''Kacey:''' But you should just ignore it, or else they're gonna think that you're mad because you're hiding something.

'''Chris:''' Ugh, Jesus...

'''Kacey:''' I mean Chris, this is just common sense.

'''Chris:''' Yeah... You know, let me, let me tell you something else, you know, uh, "common sense"... I, you know, yeah, there is a, there is [[For Julie's Eyes Only|a video of me]]... uh... having sex with a blow-up woman, with a blow-up doll, that's like a wom-, a blow-up female doll, alright? I mean that, I mean, I, the blow-up doll is a woman, and if I was a homosexual, I'd be blowing up, I'd be blowing up a... dude doll.

'''Kacey:''' I don't think it matters because dolls don't really have genders. That could be interpreted either way.

'''Chris:''' But I-

'''Kacey:''' I've heard people could be bisexual. It doesn't matter.

'''Chris:''' [stress noises] Yeah but I mean, it's obvious that the doll is, is a woman, the doll looks like a woman. With the boobs, and the long hair, and the-

'''Kacey:''' It's just a piece of plastic, Chris. It doesn't matter.

'''Chris:''' Yeah. I uh, I know it was a piece of plastic, and it wouldn't, and it wouldn't know, but still-

'''Kacey:''' So it doesn't make you straight, and it doesn't make you gay.

'''Chris:''' [double stress sigh] Well yeah, well...[stress breathing] Ahh, a buncha things. Yeah. Yeah, but anyway, still, like you know, I'm just going, I'm just going, I just been going overboard in this conversation... And, yeah, but most of the time I would, most of the time nowadays I do just ignore that.

'''Kacey:''' Well you should, but I mean it just seems like this really gets to you, because you don't get this mad at anything else, not even when they claim to have your copyrights or anything else, like you just always get so angry over the gay thing, it's just really weird. You know?

'''Chris:''' [''Sigh''] Oh, jeez...

'''Kacey:''' I mean it wouldn't be bad. You could be bisexual and it wouldn't be bad, I mean-

'''Chris:''' No, no, I am not bisexual, I'm STRAIGHT. I have- I HATE looking at [[pickles|penises]]! I love looking at [[china|vaginas]]!

'''Kacey:''' Well, I mean that doesn't make you straight or gay, if you just LOOK...I mean, gay guys actually love to look at girls' chests, did you know that?

'''Chris:''' [quiet, frustrated sigh]

'''Kacey:''' I mean, they're fascinated by them, even if they don't find them sexy.

'''Chris:''' I find wom-, I find women a lot more sexier... than any dude, I don't even... I mean, I, yeah, we talked about this before, we... we talked about this before.

'''Kacey:''' I just think it's amusing that you get so angry. I mean, I have gay friends, and they're always like, grabbing my boobs or something, and it's OK because they're gay and everything, but it's like, gay guys love boobs, it's hilarious.

'''Chris:''' [sighs disgustedly, waits a few seconds, then sighs again] Whatev-, whatever. I- Yeah, uh, whatever. Let's not, let's not talk about that anymore, um... Uh...

'''Kacey:''' You should stop [[stress sigh|sighing]], Chris, that doesn't sound like a normal adult, that's like... little upset toddler behavior.

'''Chris:''' [tries not to sigh]

'''Kacey:''' I mean, don't say "whatever" to me either, it's kind of rude.

'''Chris:''' [annoyed sigh]

'''Kacey:''' You could be polite and be like, "I disagree."

'''Chris:''' Yeah-

'''Kacey:''' Or, "Let's change the subject."

'''Chris:''' Yeah. Alright, well yeah. Let's change the subject. Hmm...

'''Kacey:''' Alright, but you gotta promise me you're not gonna do the sighing and the "whatever"s anymore.

'''Chris:''' OK yeah well I mean, I been working on the... reducing of the "whatever"s. I mean, 'cause... Kim, uh, corrected me on that as well. [waits for response] She's been correcting me on-

'''Kacey:''' Well it's not that hard, so...come on. Heh.

'''Chris:''' Uh, wait... I, uh sorry, what was that last statement? I did not not understand that last statement.

'''Kacey:''' I said it's not that hard. I mean-

'''Chris:''' Oh, yeah, not hard.

'''Kacey:''' It's all about a level of respect, I mean if you respected both of us you wouldn't do it.

'''Chris:''' Yeah. I mean, yeah, well I mean, I did try to... stop-, to not say whatev-, that word. But, I mean-

'''Kacey:''' I mean, you didn't start saying "whatever" until recently, like you've always done the sighing, but you didn't start saying that until recently.

'''Chris:''' Right... Yeah. Hm. Well... I mean I've done it, I mean I've done it numerous times before, uh... around my fam-, around my family. And, and it's like, they corrected me on that before. I guess it has been a long time since I said that word, and then... and then I, it just started coming back, it just started coming out again. That's, that's one thing that I'm, that I think there, about that. [Silence, Chris realizes she isn't going to say anything] Hm. Alright well, anyway, um... Um, let's see... What else is, what else can I, what else is on my mind I can talk about? Um...I'm not sure, lemme think, sure... No. If you've got anything else on your mind, Kacey, uh, I'm open to talk about that.

'''Kacey:''' Not unless you can tutor me in statistics.

'''Chris:''' Unless I can tutor you in statistics....Actually, I did take statistics, uh...at, uh, one or two of those classes...uh, when I started at [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|Piedmont]], as part of the, as part of when I was starting out, in the, uh, degree, I was, I, first, I started to work on...but then I, but then I switched over to [[Computer Aided Drafting and Design]]. But yeah I did do, I did do statistics, so...like, so like, you know...if you...show me like an example of, uh, what you're learning in statistics, I could prob-, I could probably remember...what to do there.

'''Kacey:''' OK, maybe I'll scan it or something for you, okay?

'''Chris:''' Alright. Yeah, and I'll see what I can, I'll see what I can remember.

'''Kacey:''' OK.

'''Chris:''' Hm. Yeah.

'''Kacey:''' Well, I have school in the morning so I should probably go, OK?

'''Chris:''' Alright. But anyway, it's nice to talk to you again. And it's nice to, and it's nice to, you know, if you can't call me, you know, to get an email from you, so I know what's going on. And, you know, it's nice, it's nice to know that, to have you confide in me, and me offering my feedback, but hey, you know, yeah. You know...just, you know, at least you're making your recovery and you will strike back victoriously.

'''Kacey:''' [''Laughs politely''] Yeah.

'''Chris:''' I'm rooting for ya, and I'm here for ya.

'''Kacey:''' Well, I appreciate that, and I'll try and talk to you tomorrow. OK?

'''Chris:''' Alright, if you can't talk to me, send me an email. Whatever...

'''Kacey:''' OK, bye.

'''Chris:''' You take care, be safe, bye-bye.

==External links==
[http://www.4shared.com/mp3/iOBf4RqQce/Kacey_Call_24.html MP3 Phone Call]

{{succession|label=[[Kacey_calls|Kacey Phone Calls]]|prevlink=[[Kacey Call 23]]|nextlink=[[Father Call]]}}

{{FanChats}}

[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Phone calls]]
[[Category:Liquid Saga]]

14 January 2010

2026-05-04T00:01:05Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

'''14 January 2010''' (officially '''01142010.MOV''') was uploaded by Chris on 14 [[January 2010]]. In this video, he tries to convince the audience that he is [[Ego|a good person]] even after he [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|cursed]] [[Asperchu|someone]] and wished for their [[Death threats|imminent demise]].

[[Chris and health#Hygiene|Chris also seems to have worn the same shirt for three days in a row]].
==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = 01142010.MOV
| ytid = DjZMBkSKXwE
| stardate = 14 [[January 2010]]
| subject = {{Fanart|text}}
| style = {{Reason|text}}
| shirt = {{DogShirt|text}}
| saga = {{Asperchu|text}}
| previous = [[12 January 2010]]
| next = [[What's the Name, Christian Chandler, C H R I S C H A N|What's the Name, Christian Chandler, C H R I S C H A N]]
}}

{{quote|A lot of us have cursed people. Everybody has cursed somebody in their lives.}}

=== Transcript ===

Ah, [[Captain's Log]], Stardate January 14th, 2010.

Welp, I have just looked up on the, uh, [[CWCipedia]] and noticed a jumbo image that, uh, Alec and his associates have put on there and, uh, yes, I'll ha—I'll admit that I have cursed them, though they probably just assumed that, aside from my being angry at them, but I spy— but regardless of that.

In response to that as well as, uhh, their questioning, uh, me as a individual, as such. I mean a lot of us have cursed people. Everybody has cursed somebody in their lives, or said curse word— whatever. But I'm still a g—I'm still a good, individual human being. It's just that, like them with their mental problems and me and my mental problems, when we go into defense mode or response to something that really offends us, we can be mean and c—we can be mean. And that's just, uh, our defense like, you know. It's just like the (?) state of a man. Something offends us, prf [''waves and makes punching gesture''], we want to punch that sucker right in the face. Every ma— every individual man with, or without, a mental handicap can agree with me on that.

But still, I have given you [[Sonichu]] for the past almost ten years now. Well, up to, anyway, 'cause the website didn't go up until 2004. But still—it will be almost ten years now, since I first started him on March 17, 2000. Or ten year anniversary, [''Chris's phone rings with the Motorola W315 "Sensation" ringtone''] March 17, 2010.

[''Chris moves in to turn off his phone.'']

Anyway, uh, regar— irregardless of the incoming call here, hm, I say, trust the ma—trust the individual who you've been trusting this whole time. Don't trust this new guy. [[Chris and his ego|He's just trying to take my fame]]. Please, think about that, my loyal fans. Stay safe and have a good da—

[''Video cuts off abruptly.'']

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[12 January 2010]]|nextlink=[[What's the Name, Christian Chandler, C H R I S C H A N|What's the Name, Christian Chandler, C H R I S C H A N]]|}}

{{Captain's Log}}

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, January 2010| 2010-01-14]]
[[Category:CWCipedia Saga videos| 2010-01-14]]
[[Category:Asperchu Saga videos| 2010-01-14]]
[[Category:Kodak camera videos| 2010-01-14]]

CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation

2026-05-03T23:32:36Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

The '''CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation''' is a set of videos that [[Chris]] released in hopes of selling the [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'']] franchise to investors. Note that "Personal Sonichu Presentation" can be shortened to [[PSP]].

Chris imagines that he is speaking directly to "businesspeople" who might back the commercial development of [[Sonichu]]. In the first video, he delivers a brief history of his character's creation, and also displays a few Sonichu-related objects in addition to his comics and his famous medallion, including crude clay sculptures of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] and a "[[Sonic]] versus Sonichu" racing board game. He concludes by claiming that he plans to complete between 50 and 100 ''Sonichu'' comics in his lifetime (if Chris kept up his pace he had in late [[2009]], he would have reached the minimum goal in 2029, [[Chris and Health|if he's lucky enough to still be living]], not counting his [[Saga#Dark Ages (20 March 2010 to 3 September 2014)|various]] [[Jail Saga|hiatuses]] over the years and a slow upload schedule that has run dry as of December 2020. Ultimately, Chris is only 15 issues, or only 30% of the way towards the minimum goal).

The second video is substantially less coherent. Chris loses the plot as far as attempting to sell his character and settles down to [[Chris and his ego|narcissistic wallowing in his supposed personal achievements and his fantasies of a vast international ''Sonichu'' fandom.]] He spends several minutes showing off fan [[art]] submitted by [[trolls]], all of which is unsurprisingly far better than anything Chris himself could ever dream of drawing. He also seems to have revived his old dreams of a ''[[Pokémon]]'' video game or trading card expansion starring [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]], which suggests he has forgotten the conclusion of the [[Miyamoto Saga]] or managed to actively push those events out of his mind.

Perhaps his most impressively deluded fantasy involves the prospect of a Sonichu animated series. He believes that [[Sony]] would be interested in developing the show, that the [[Adult Swim|Cartoon Network]] would be interested in broadcasting the show, and that he would direct and star as the voice of himself and Sonichu. (He briefly shows off his "Sonichu voice," an almost indistinguishably higher-pitched version of his normal voice.) While Cartoon Network has not opted to make a Sonichu animated series, they are the American broadcasters of ''[[Sonic Boom]]''. But we digress.

As usual, Chris displays a shocking lack of awareness concerning the nonexistent commercial viability of his character. He also, once again, fails to realize that giving out your home address, home and phone number and other key bits of personal information in a video that's publicly available on [[YouTube]] is not such a hot idea.

In addition to uploading the videos to YouTube, Chris also made a page for these presentations on the [[CWCipedia]]. He also attempted to upload the follow-up PowerPoint presentation videos, but failed, possibly because either the video files were corrupt or he actually thought .ppt files were video files compatible with YouTube.

Animator [[Wikipedia:Harry Partridge|Harry Partridge]] has called this his favorite Chris-chan video.<ref>[http://animationaficionados.com/2011/08/23/episode-35-harry-partridge/]</ref>

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation Part 1
| ytid = mdkUjnBGMSw
| stardate = 23 [[November 2009]]
| subject = {{Comics|text}}, {{Fanart|text}}
| style = {{Smug|text}}
| shirt = {{ClassicShirt|text}}
| previous = [[14 November 2009]]
| next = [[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation#Part 2|CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation Part 2]]
}}
{{quote|Very famous. Very, very famous.}}

=== Transcript ===
[''The song "Sonic Boom" by Pastiche is playing on the PS3 behind Chris, at times loud enough to make Chris hard to understand.''] Mmm. HELLO, w—hello there muh-business people! Welcome to world of [[CWCville]], Virginia, [''Chris fidgets with his [[Medallion of Fail]]''] and the world of [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]]. My name is [[Christian Weston Chandler]] of [[Ruckersville, Virginia]], [[14 Branchland Court]], ZIP code 22968. And, uh, my home phone number is (434) 990-0198, my cell phone being 760-0848.

Anyway, I am here today to talk to you about d—revolutionary geh—leviloutionary lil' character that WILL [''jump cut''] pah, uh—will make a lot of [[money]], because he's already been innernet-famous fer about 20—fer almost 10 years now. [''pulls out a [[Scrapbook of Fail|Sonichu binder]] and holds it up to the camera''] His name is Sonichu. The l'il, real Electric Hedgehog [[Pokémon]] right here. [''points to Sonichu on cover of [[Sonichu 0|Issue 0]], then starts to put away the binder''] You'll find out more about him. You can learn more about him and read [''holds the binder back up to the camera''] the comic books—comic book pages I've written—I've drawn and written so far [''puts the binder away this time''] on [[CWCipedia]], which, uh, the address to that would be next to this [[YouTube]] video in da details.

Anyway, we are here t—t—anyway yeah. His or—his origin is basically... yeah, first off, uh, we have to c—look at the—my big BOOK here. [''pulls out a different, giant binder''] Look how big that book is. [[Pickle|So thick]], I had to get ANOTHER BOOK. [''hefts a second equally huge binder''] Heh. [''sets second binder down'']

Anyway, [''sets giant binder down and opens it''] it all s—[''video skips''] Anyway, uh... upon the cre—uh, upon the physical—upon the mental creation of Sonichu, it originally came to me, because, for one—for a computer graphics class back in high school, I had to create a CD cover for... [''wipes his forehead with his sleeve''] a CD that's, uh, was not to be sold anywhere, but, anyway. Made for fun, but—so, I drew up a...—a—this—this CD cover right here [''holds up a binder page showing [[Christian's Favorite Hits!]]''] and this—this—this was Sonichu's first a—forst official appearance. Front and back on the ins—on the insert. If, anyway, uh, basically, [''video skips''] the—uh, the idea came to me, like, you know, yeah, I wanted to use Sonic the Hedgehog and Pikachu on the cover of my CD, but they're both copyrighted characters, and previously-copyrighted characters were not allowed. So, uh, after lunch, uh, during that same day, in da [[Manchester High School]] with my teacher Miss Naelie Chalifoux, thank'a very much, I have...—it just dawned upon me, with, uh, merging together, in combination of the two, and then Sonichu was born.

Now that and then [[homos|in da but]] storywise, he was born—he—he was born amidst the, uh, s—sitcha—situation in [[Station Square]] whereas portray—previous portrayed in the ''Sonic Adventure'' game, available on Dreamcast and Nintendo GameCube. Ay—yeah, but during the battle, the Chaos Monster, Super Sonic, ran into a spystanding Pikachu and, uh, transformed in—into Sonichu... as that was also—as the origins also described in the ''Number Zero'' book on the—on the CWCipedia.

[''reaches for glasses, then reconsiders and wipes his forehead with his arm'']

Now, the, uhh...—now, Sonichu's appeal—Sonichu and Rosechu's appeal: yeah, mainly, the, uhh, appeal was... [[Sonichu 8|t—aimed towards children]]... and, uhh, there was the start of the books, there. We got little toys here, I put togetter. Even a—even a board game, where we put the boards... right here. Sonic vs. Sonichu, a little racing-type game, but it's a l'il—it's a little bit Monopoly-style, with game ca—with, uhh, cards that you pick up... uhn, and shortcuts. Anyway, that is, uhh, part of the, uhh, merchandising thing that I plan on branching out with... in the world of Sonichu, eventually. As, uhh, p—as portrayed—as previously-mentioned in a YouTube video, I have the official registration copyright of Sonichu... and Rosechu and the C-uh-CWCville, in my—in my own name, and that—and that is also accessible on the CWCipedia: the scan of that... actual piece of paper that came from the Virginia Library of Congress.

[''opens binder and sighs'']

Anyway, yeah, I got a ''whole'' bunch of history here. All my history. It comes, like, you know, from creation... with, uhh...—to making, uhh, to a whole bunch of stories, and whatnot...—and even, uhh, made a title(?)... for it in my [[Homemade Nintendo Power magazine|homemade ''Nintendo Power'' magazine]], which was, uhh—which I believe I told Nintendo of America about... in a previous letter or two. Anyway, yeah, it was—it was very—it was very lucrative, and... we do plan on branching out even on DVD, of, like, on my live DVD that's called [[Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)|''CWC... Christian Weston Chandler... That's Me. Yep, I'm on TV!'']] Uhh, C-''Christian Weston Chandler... Yep, I'm on TV!'' That's the name of the DVD. So, if it comes out on DVD, [[Chris and reality|I hope to get it on... Blu-ray, as well]]. And, also, I've created the, uhh—a couple of Sonich—a, uhh, level S—for Sonichu, on ''[[Little Big Planet]]'', Sony—on Sony [[PlayStation 3]]... which, uhh, is called "Sonichu Episode 0". You can look it up; my [[PSN]] ID is ''Sonichu'': S-o-n-i-c-h-u. ...Anyway, e—e—following this, uhh, video... there will be a... video where, uhh... it will be presented live from my PC: a PowerPoint presentation that can better describe... the situation. Anyway, with the count of books, I plan—I plan on drawing, at least, in my lifetime, hopefully, between fifty to a hundred books.

==Part 2==

{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation Part 2
| video = {{#ev:youtube|3XLWTuswqtA}}
| stardate = 23 [[November 2009]]
| subject = {{Comics|text}}, {{Fanart|text}}
| style = {{Smug|text}}
| shirt = {{ClassicShirt|text}}
| previous = [[CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation#Video|CWC Personal Sonichu Presentation Part 1]]
| next = [[Sonichu Powerpoint]]
}}
=== Transcript ===
[''Picking up where the first video left off.'']

By which, uh, definitely more will be a re—a ra—around Sonichu, after I, which I have dubbed myself the [[CWCville|Mayor of CWCville]], in this glorious shopping, this glorious two-story [[CWCville Shopping Center|shopping mall]], ah, that is glorious. I actually have, uh, plans that I have, uh, made in [[Computer Aided Drafting and Design]], which I will present through this video, near the end of it—near the end of this video.

[''He begins flipping through a thick three-ring binder.'']

Anyway, yeah, got a whooole bunch of stuff here. Yeah, we can definitely franchise 'n' all this, you know. Even ideas of a ''Pokémon: Lightning Version'', where players can catch Sonichu and Rosechu in the wild, even breeding them to make the other individual Electric Hedgehog characters that are—have been portrayed in the book, such as Wild, Bubbles, Angelica, Punchy, and Magi-Chan, among others that have also been created as well, due—due—due to, you know, processes of the evolution stones, and daytime/nighttime evolutions, friendship, all that good stuff. All in the—the files here, including their little baby forms Sonee and Rosey, to evolutions from original Sonichu and Rosechu....

[''He displays the Sonichu and Rosechu figures again.'']

...[[Metonic]] and [[Vamprosa]]. Those characters are also featured on the [[CWCipedia]]. At least on Sonichu's page; I'm planning on making a page for Rosechu herself on that note. But, anyway, This—this—this Sonichu franchise, it has a biiig number of fans. I even have a number of fan submissions. Like, this here is a draw—is a piece of fan art that came from a girl I knew in Australia.
[[Image:SonichuCover10.jpg|thumb|right|[[PandaHalo]]'s fanart, which serves as the cover of [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]].]]
[''He holds up the picture, presumably from [[PandaHalo]], to the camera.'']

And that's a postcard sent from her, right there. She, uh, also, uh, created a Sonichu and Rosechu that's featured in the ''Number Nine'' book I'm currently drawing. They go by the name of [[Chloe]] and [[Blazebob Sonichu|Blazebob]].

[''Chris turns around the file revealing another piece of art.'']

Anyway, also, on the flip side of this page is from somebody else. It's possibly the best Sonichu fan art ever. Look at that. That's gonna be the cover of the, uh, the first book that's just based on Sonichu, which'll definitely be after ''Number Ten''...

[''He turns around the picture to display Panda's image.'']

...which this one will be the cover of.

[''He looks at the other image again.'']

Hm. This one came from, uh, "Zorah Q. Zowild," that's his YouTube name. Yeah, also, you know, I've received fan art in the snail mail, those are printed off the internet. Like this lovely one.
[[Image:AliciasSonichuandRosechuFanart.jpg|thumb|"And from that, you know, that's, you know, she could have done a little better like, you know, like Rosey's tail was wrong, but I'll forgive her"]]
[''He holds up a drawing of Sonichu and Rosechu in formal wear.'']

That came from, uh, that came from a lovely woman named Allie, in Sun Valley, California. Thank you. Thank you very much. And from that, you know, that's, you know, she could have done a little better like, you know, like Rosey's tail was wrong, but I'll forgive her. But, still, drew my own version of it.

[''He holds up a crude imitation of the previous drawing.'']
[[Image:CWCsEloquateSonichuandRosechu.jpg|thumb|right|Chris's "superior" version of Allie's drawing.]]
Heh, heh. Isn't that fun? Oh, of course, local art, in Charlottesville, an art—an artist did a caricature of me.

[''He turns around the file to display the caricature.'']

I included that in the ''Number Nine'' book on a billboard.

[''He holds up one more piece of art.'']

Here's another fun piece of fan art. It comes from, uh... B.C. Uh, okay, I can't, uh, Vancouver, B.C. Yeah. Anyway, yeah. [[Chris and reality|Very famous. Very, very famous.]] Yep. Uh, this one's just a fan letter from a... from a [[BlueSpike|Julie in Ohio]].

[''He holds up an image, but the high contrast of his video renders it impossible to make out.'']

Here's a little piece of fan art from a, uh, from someone who's possibly, uh, Japanese. Who lives in [[Virginia]]. And also, recently, this guy here, uh, Jason Darling...thank you very much; I got your package.

[''He holds up a folder of photographs.'']

He made a replica of my [[medallion]], which in them, which, you know, this one here is the original that I made myself from my own hands, from Crayola Model Magic and acrylic paints. In the comic books this allows me to transform into Chris-chan Sonichu. Which, that is described in the comic book pages as reposed in the CWCipedia. Also sent me a pack of Maple Story cards, so again, thank you Jason. I appreciate your encouragement, as well as everybody else's. Anyway, uh... hmm... yeah, I picked up a—also received a fan CD from a—from a, uhh... BK Jones in Texas. Oh, here's anutter—here's anutter fun one that's recent. Look at this envelope. Isn't that... cute? That's fun. And then they did a computer art... over there. This came all the way from... Portland... Oregon, I believe it is. And, uhh, I got various other... fan letters in—in this page. Uhh, I'd pull 'em out, but, you know, they're in—I just left them in their envelopes. Nope, fan art dere.

But, anyway, also, aside from that, uhh... I have definitely—I have definitely made a set of trading—'kay, this is my [[The Wall of Originals|homemade Pokémon trading cards]]... which I, uhh, used—which I keep at home for art's sake. A whole heck—got, like—whole—a ''whole lot'' of them here. This could definitely branch out... And a very ''profitable'' thing, both for between Nintendo and Sega, and also with Son—also possibly with Sony, with, uhh—you know, with the a—also with, uhh, the anime show that maybe—maybe Cartoon Network and their people could help me out on... eh, when tha—when that TV show gets run. Where I'll voic—where I will be happy to—where I will be the ''director'', and I will be voicing myself as Sonichu. Listen to the difference: okay, this is me, Christian Weston Chandler, and this will be Sonichu: [''clearly taking after [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HEIpeZFUnJE George] by not changing his voice whatsoever''] Hey, Rosechu! Let's go out and zap to the extreme! We got some bad guys to defeat! Come on, let's go! Yeah!

[''quietly musing over his own amazing degree of fail''] Hmm... odd, but... [''recovered from the shock, back at normal volume''] anyway, uhh, running low on time. Uhh, just a couple of, uhh, other things of interest: uhh, Sonichu was also previously featured in May, 2004, in this issue of ''[[Nintendo Power]]'' magazine, in "The Crossing Quarterly"... with a, uhh, submission from my ''[[Animal Crossing]]'' game—for Nintendo GameCube, currently also available in—in other titles on DS and Nintendo Wii. And, also, uhh—and, shortly after that, it was featured... in a newsletter at the Piedmont Virgi—at the local [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]]... among, uhh, other... published things. Also, uhh, when the, uhh, Sonic website was owiginawwy—was just CWCSonichu site, I had my own [[Sonichu's News Dash|News Dash newsletters]]. That lasted a short while... Hmm. Actually, uh, yeah, but any—yeah, but, anyway, everybody knows on the CWCipedia, so....

[''sigh'']

Anyway, here: I'll show you the, uhh, just the, uhh, whole layout of the CWCville Shopping Center. I actually have all these... printouts from... my... [[CADD|Computer-Aided Drafting and cla—cla—Computer-Aided Drafting and Design classes]], but this is the last one, right before I graduated from Piedmont Virginia College. hen my degree and certificate in Commu—Computer-Aided Drafting and Design. It's very—it's very good. I mean, I would just imagine this in real life. It would even have a Pokémon Center in there, like the one in New York used to have, before it turned into a Nintendo World, USA. It shoulda stayed a ''Pokémon Center''! Now, that was definitely better appeal than just... Nintend—than just Nintendo, even though, yes, Nintendo... has the rights and everything, but... it was ''the Pokémon Center''! I mean... le—if the CWC—if the CWCville Shopping Center does get built... let's agree to put a Pokémon Center in it. And it has a Mayor's Office... right here, above the... front of—up above the main front entrance of the building... which is as portrayed in the comic book series. Aaand a whole buncha... other stuff I have, uh, here. It's just side-...stuff from... my... life, and whatever.

Anyway, uhh... uhh, pretty much, uhh, take care of it for, uhh, this par—for this portion of the, uhh, video, [''removes glasses''] so the next video to follow this one will be the... [''taps table''] PowerPoint presentation, so I will be reading audioly—I will be reading from that and pointing the camera toward the PC, [''quietly and unconfidently''] thank you. [''gives a half-assed Cub Scout salute'']

So... to Nintendo and Sega and Sony and all the other companies interested in... franchising with me here: [''gives another half-assed Cub Scout salute''] I await your call to my home phone... number or my cell phone.

Thank you very much, and have a [''gives ANOTHER half-assed [[Chris's mannerisms|Cub Scout salute]]''] ''pleasant day''!

==See also==
* [[Chris and the industry]]
{{References}}
{{CWCipedia|chris=Sonichu Presentations}}
{{clear}}
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[14 November 2009]]|nextlink=[[Sonichu Powerpoint]]|}}
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, November 2009| 2009-11-23]]
[[Category:Kodak camera videos| 2009-11-23]]

Chris and video games

2026-05-01T00:08:26Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

{{taxpayermoney}}

{{quote|And [[Bob Chandler|Christian's father]] says it only takes a few hours for him to master an electronic game, and then...move onto another! I can't master any of them.|A TV anchorwoman on a younger Chris winning the [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes]].}}

[[Image:LoveThatLifeUpgrade.jpg|thumb|Chris tried having sex with a video game console once. [[Chris humps his PS3|It didn't work out]].]]

In case a cursory glance at this wiki did not tell you, Chris likes '''video games'''. A lot. In fact, Chris definitely has spent more time on video games than any other activity or pursuit, including his [[Love Quest]]. He has said he spends between two and four hours a day playing games,<ref>[[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 7]]</ref> and the real figure is likely higher than what he admits to.

Without delving too deeply into armchair psychiatry, it is not hard to see why video games hold so much appeal to Chris. His brain is wired to operate according to [[Autism|absolute values and rigidly-defined processes]]. This is one of the reasons he has so much difficulty in the real world — the rules keep changing on him- if he figures out the rules in the first place. In the artificial world of video games, the challenges are the kind that his inflexible mind is able to comprehend and surmount. There, the rules never change, and all he has to do is follow them. [[Chris and reality|Reality isn't quite as simple]], which is why he spends as little time out there as possible.

==Early Years==
Chris has been an avid gamer since a very young age. He first played video games on a [[Commodore 64]] home computer system. Before he was eight years old, he had a Game Boy and a [[Nintendo]] Entertainment System, and he acquired more consoles and games throughout the 1990s. According to [[The Sonichu Chronicles]], he has been a fan of [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] since the character's [[1991]] debut for the Sega Genesis. His game collection really took off in [[1993]], when he won his famous shopping spree in the [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes]] and added $1,000 worth of Sega games and hardware to his hoard.

==Chris's game collection==
[[Image:404-SpiderManSignedGame.jpg|thumb|Well, if ''[[No More Jokes|Spider-Man]]'' says it...]]

{{main|List of Chris's games}}

Although the last completely reliable account of his collection dates back all the way to [[January 2009]], Chris owns, conservatively, nearly 850 different game titles across twenty different platforms. He sold off roughly one hundred games in various trips to GameStop and local pawn shops during the late summer and early fall of 2010, but this hardly depletes the reserves, at all. He also maintained an account with the mail-order rental service GameFly until [[August 2010]].

[[Sony]] consoles dominate Chris's collection. Counting the games he has downloaded through the [[PlayStation Network]], nearly half of his games belong to the PlayStation family. Nintendo comes next, including more than 100 games for Nintendo's different portable platforms, and Sega brings [[Homos|up the rear]]. While he owns every Sega console short of an 8-bit Master System, and Sonic the Hedgehog is one of his favorite individual franchises, games for Sega consoles make up less than 15-10% of Chris's collection.

Chris's violent hatred of the [[Xbox]] is well-known, but [[Chris and hypocrisy|he likely owns, or at one point owned, an original Xbox console]]. However, it is not known how much time he has spent on Xbox games. His [[List of Chris's eBay sales|eBay account]] shows that he tried to sell off a handful of Xbox games in the summer of [[2008]]. The record of his eBay sales also indicates that, in addition to owning at least one of every machine he owns games for, he has gone through at least three or four of Sony's original PlayStation consoles over the years. It is possible that he has had to replace a few of the infamously fragile apparatuses for overuse, but this could also be an indication that he bought the systems and games in bundles.

It is virtually impossible to gauge exactly how much money has been shoveled into Chris's game collection over the past few decades. Knowledgeable [[trolls]], however, reckon that his physical collection of games and hardware represents around $20,000. His PSN downloads, meanwhile, can be accurately accounted for – there, the bill is close to $3,500 and surely climbing all the while. One of the more grievous examples of Chris's video-game-related overspending is his apparent ownership of at least two copies of the eighty-dollar ''[[Street Fighter]] IV Collector's Edition'', as evidenced by the two identical exclusive Ryu figurines he later sold on eBay. While it is possible that Chris received the second figure from an outside source or packaging error, his attempt to bribe [[BlueSpike]] [[Julie Reveals Herself: The Prequel|with a copy of the game]] and his habit of wasting money for no particular reason lend credence to the former theory.

In January 2015, it was leaked on the [[CWCki Forums]] that Chris had spent an absurd amount of money on Nintendo consoles and games, ''racking up '''585''' transactions'' in the last 4.5 years,<ref>[[Nintendo employee reveals details of Chris's Nintendo transactions]]</ref> or 150 payments a year. This list includes useless shovelware, Virtual Console games, and [[Sonic Boom Protests|both versions of a game he does not even like.]] Of these, 276 purchases are known to be handheld games, 8 are known to be video game consoles (''buying '''4''' DS and DSi consoles''), and 75 which are known to be console games. The grand total cost of all Chris's '''listed''' purchases is '''$7460.43''' or '''$1657.87/year'''. Keep in mind that 39% of the purchases Chris has on his account (such as Skylanders figures, amiibos, and his Wii U Virtual Console purchases) are not yet specified, meaning that their cost is not included in this already insanely high figure. Apparently, his main attention and [[Nintendo Power Magazine|fanboyism]] has shifted from PlayStation back to Nintendo, for unknown reasons.

This leak also revealed that Chris plays almost every game demo available on the eShop, Nintendo's online downloadable video game store, even if he has no interest in said game. This leak also confirmed he had bought every single [[Sonic the Hedgehog|Sonic]] game and primary [[Pokémon]] RPG, proving that he is still a major fanboy of [[Sonichu (comic)|both franchises]], and also confirmed that he still makes many purchases multiple times over for no apparent reason, such as of ''Wario's Woods''.

==Game Preferences==
Going on what evidence is available, such as what he has talked about on his websites and [[YouTube]], what his PSN profile shows the most effort put into, and what he decides to construct elaborate fan-works around, Chris has fairly childish, "casual" tastes in video games. Though he puts an inordinate level of effort and time into gaming, he does so playing stuff like Sonic, ''[[Pokémon]]'', ''[[Animal Crossing]]'', ''[[Guitar Hero]]'', and other games geared toward more mainstream and less "hardcore" audiences. His favorite racing game, ''ModNation Racers'', is a straightforward title that allows players to create their own tracks and cars. ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]'' earned a rabid following with its level editor, but otherwise, it is just another side-scrolling platform game (and Chris hardly strains the level editor to the limits of its potential). Much of his PSN trophy case is filled out with achievements obtained by playing simple downloadable demoscene and indie productions.

Chris has purchased a fair share of M-rated games, such as ''Family Guy: The Video Game'', ''Grand Theft Auto'', and ''Call of Duty''<ref>[[List of Chris's video games]]
</ref>, which shows that his interest in games is not necessarily limited to the E rating. These games, however, tend to be fairly shallow in terms of gameplay. ''[[Brutal Legend Plus|Brütal Legend]]'' isn't remarkably deep as far as gameplay is concerned; while the game is an M-rated title with swearing, decapitations, heavy metal music, and tricky real-time strategy elements, for the most part, the atmosphere is still jolly and humorous enough, and the majority of gameplay consists of exploring the world and having straightforward beat-'em-up fights. Some have questioned whether or not Chris's interest in ''Brütal Legend'' was because of an affinity for director [[Wikipedia:Tim Schafer|Tim Schafer]]'s other quirky, offbeat games such as ''[[Wikipedia:Psychonauts|Psychonauts]]'' and ''[[Wikipedia:Grim Fandango|Grim Fandango]]''. While Chris might be drawn to the perceived [[random-access humor]] of those games, it is more likely that they were too intelligent for him, and thus hold no appeal to his childish mind. Chris's interest in ''Brütal Legend'' was most likely due to Jack Black voicing the main character, and possibly [[Chris and music|his failed attempts to be seen as a connoisseur of music]].

The games that Chris owns are not necessarily the games that Chris plays. His PSN downloads strongly suggest that he spends money on his gaming hobby more or less out of compulsion. Witness the $65 he spent on downloadable content for ''Disgaea 3'', a game he had only played to 7% completion several months after originally buying all those downloads. It is reasonable to assume that Chris has similar spending habits in real life, a theory bolstered somewhat by his retro game collections and a house full of junk. Chris's collections of games for the Sega CD, Sega Saturn, and a couple of other now-dead consoles are dominated by bargain-bin trash, extremely common or poor quality games that are easily bought at low prices. No knowledgeable gamer would ever pay money for ''Power Factory Featuring C+C Music Factory'', except maybe as a gag gift, but Chris apparently thought it was worth owning. This habit seems to be picked up from [[Barbara Chandler|Barbara]] and continues to this day in the form of eShop shovelware and Virtual Console downloads.

His collection does a good job of telling us what sort of games Chris does not play, though. Outside of the ''Pokémon'' series, for instance, he evinces no interest in role-playing games. Most of the non-Pokémon RPGs in his collection, like ''Suikoden'' and ''Final Fantasy VII'', are PlayStation retro releases he impulse-bought through the PSN. Chris buys those up like penny candy – he has even downloaded several digital duplicates of PlayStation games of which he already owns physical copies. He has played a handful of the ''[[Hyperdimension Neptunia]]'' games, even earning all the trophies for ''Megadimension Neptunia VII'', but for the most part his interest was focused squarely on the anime adaptation of the games.

Despite being obsessed with ''Pokémon'', ''Animal Crossing'' and Nintendo consoles as a whole, he is not a hardcore Nintendo fan as some might suspect. He never seems to show interest in the latest content from Nintendo, and the hardcore Nintendo games he does own (such as games from the ''Metroid'', ''The Legend of Zelda'' and ''Mario'' franchises) are most likely just collecting dust on his game collection racks. However, a January 2014 leak by a Nintendo Employee revealed that Chris had, in fact, returned to his Nintendo roots, buying nearly every single game on the eShop.

He owns almost no sports games. In the [[Mailbag 2|Mailbag]], he once noted that "Sports titles do not really thrill me," although he did not explain exactly [[Obesity|why.]]

With a few exceptions, Chris has no apparent interest in video games marketed towards his own age group, which is unsurprising. "Hardcore" games aimed at "adults" are games that simply would not interest Chris because of his juvenile mindset. Video games (and anything else, for that matter) with mature themes that are not two-dimensionally crass and full of [[random-access humor]] would probably confuse and bore Chris and make him feel awkward and uncomfortable, adding to the fact he probably would not be able to get very far in the game. This is supported by the fact that he did try out ''Bioshock'', a first-person shooter with RPG elements, but only for a short time and never touched it again. Most likely the whole game itself flew right over Chris's head and he decided to play some ''Wheel of Fortune'' instead. However, ever since his [[100 2357.MOV|sixth declaration that he has left the internet]] in late [[2010]], some more high-profile games aimed at adults have appeared on his PSN Trophy list (such as ''Grand Theft Auto IV'' and ''Fallout: New Vegas''). Apparently the ''Hannah Montana'' PS3 game is no longer enough to fill his abundance of free time, and he has taken to playing games he would not normally be doing anything else with his life.

While he sometimes gets tagged with the "[[Japanophilia|weeaboo]]" label, Chris does not appear to prefer games made in Japan over any other part of the world. In fact, his favorite games of 2008-2009, the period where he has told us the most about what he plays, are pretty evenly divided between Japan (''Sonic'', ''Pokémon''), the United States (''Guitar Hero'', ''Brütal Legend''), Canada (''ModNation Racers''), and Europe (''LittleBigPlanet''). He counts a few Japanese Game Boy and Nintendo DS imports in his larger collection, but they are obviously titles he picked up to try and impress/bribe [[Megan Schroeder]] — almost all of them are spin-offs from popular anime, especially magical girl series like ''Sailor Moon'' and ''Pretty Cure''.

When Chris and Megan still got along well together, they were serious players of the arcade version of ''[[Soul Calibur]] III''. There is also an arcade in Chris's plans for the [[CWCville Shopping Center]]. However, given Chris's inclinations to retreat into the comfortable confines of his bedroom, the chances he goes to arcades are slim.

==Chris, the Brave Console Warrior==
Chris thinks the perennial "Console Wars" between rival manufacturers of game machines are extremely serious affairs, and engages in them with all of the bile and fervor of a 10-year-old child soldier in the PlayStation Army. On rare occasions, he has almost seemed rational in this respect, saying he "just doesn't like" or "doesn't care much for" the Xbox, but most of the time he does not mince words when describing the vile, loathsome, and [[Car Pranks|blatantly stupid]] [[HEXBox]]. By comparison, he has waxed poetic when describing the awesomeness of the [[PS3]], most prominently in his [[PS3 History Level]] for ''LittleBigPlanet''. According to [[Mimms and Lucas Q&A#Video games|Lucas]], Chris would even express his fury over the Xbox in public while hanging out at [[The GAMe PLACe]].

It is hard to tell where Chris's religious devotion to the PlayStation comes from, but to call it "religious" is not hyperbole. Like his faith in [[Chris and religion|GodJesus]], his support for Sony is blind and unthinking. Though he can come up with a simple justification for his opinions in a pinch — typically he brings up the annual fee for online gaming on Xbox Live — Chris shows no sign of having put any serious thought or research into his choice of consoles. His descriptions of the PS3's advantages in places like his [[Chris Chan Update 13 October 2008|Columbus Day 2008 video]] tend to sound like a collection of marketing buzzwords (as filtered through the mind of a [[Chris's room|cave-dwelling]] autist, anyway).

Interestingly, Chris was not always a blindly devoted fan of Sony. In the [[Animal Crossing Documentary]], we see that back in [[2003]], Chris pledged his allegiance to Nintendo and the GameCube, stating that both the predecessors of the PS3 stank as much as the original Xbox. His feelings changed when he bought a PS1 at a rummage sale for cheap, intending to resell it elsewhere for profit, but instead played it and found it was not bad.<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 14]]</ref> One would expect this to be a lesson against nonsensical [[Chris and brand loyalty|brand loyalty]], but instead Chris just focused his hatred on Microsoft. Likely, prior to this Chris was a Sega fanatic at Nintendo's expense; if true, then it demonstrates how [[List of Chris's sweethearts|fickle]] Chris is regarding devotion.

When asked what his thoughts were on the then-up and coming [[Nintendo Switch]] in [[2017]], Chris responded in Chris [[Mailbag 29|fashion]], and simply stated that he has no [[Exercise|thoughts]] on it, due to being [[stress|preoccupied]]. He would eventually acquire his own Switch a few years later.

[[File:Thoughts_On_Switch_Jan_19_2017.png|thumb|[[Mailbag 29|Whatever]]]]

Unsurprisingly, Chris is ignorant of things he has chosen not to like. The only 360 game he's seemed to show interest in, [https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/xbox360/995562-dont-be-nervous-talking-to-girls "Don't Be Nervous Talking to Girls"], seen in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]] being modified for the PS3, was suggested to him by the fans. Though the game is just a crappy dating sim, and there are other 360-exclusive games which would appeal to him, Chris claimed that it was the only game worth playing on the 360.

Even slinging mud at the names of the consoles is very serious business to Chris. In [[Lars Call]], Chris says he does not like it when people call PS3 the "PS Triple", because that is what [[trolls]] call it. Of course, this comes from a man who [[Chris and hypocrisy|ceaselessly rants about the "Hex Box"]].

==Chris and Online Gaming==
Perhaps unsurprisingly, given his antisocial nature, Chris was not fond of online multiplayer games in any genre for a while, be they sports sims, shooters, racing games, or whatever else. Though he's owned several games for the PS3 and other consoles that would allow him to play online and interact with other people, his PSN profile regularly showed that he put little time into multiplayer games.

In 2010 and afterward, two exceptions to this rule emerged. He did a good deal of online racing in ''ModNation Racers'' during the summer of 2010, while, early in 2011, Chris began to show an interest in an online role-playing game for the first time, ''DC Universe Online''. His fondness for ''ModNation'' competition and MMO gaming eventually passed, though.

Dedicated observers of Chris's gaming habits may notice a bit of a paradox developing here: Chris claimed to hate the Xbox 360 because Microsoft requires a $50 annual subscription fee for online multiplayer gaming. It is a mystery, then, why this would wind him up so badly, when he hardly played any multiplayer games, but such is the nature of Chris. [[Mailbag]] correspondents have tried to point out the seeming contradiction here, not to mention the weird contrast between Chris's thriftiness as far as Xbox Live is concerned and the massive amounts of money he willingly wastes on worthless digital trinkets through Nintendo and the PSN. For all the good it has done, though, they may as well have tried to change his opinion of [[Asperger syndrome]].

In later years, Chris would begin playing online games on his Switch and PC, playing titles such as ''[[Tetris 99]]'' and ''[[Payday 2]]''.

===Chris, the Trophy Whore===
While Chris has little evident interest in directly interacting with other humans in online games, he does seem to enjoy building up a massive trophy case to passively show off on his PlayStation Network profile. He has doggedly played through a number of games in order to earn every available achievement, and on occasion he appeals to his [[fanbase]] for help in earning trophies. For instance, he begged readers of his [[Twitter]] feed to download his ''ModNation Racers'' levels so he could pick up one more trophy.

Slacker that he is, Chris prefers to put forth as little effort as possible to earn his trophies. Presented with a trophy in ''LittleBigPlanet 2'' that asked him to contribute a custom level to the game's online community, he fulfilled the requirement by uploading an empty level with no work put into it. (When this level was deleted by the community's administrators, he took the next-easiest route and uploaded his old levels made with the first ''LittleBigPlanet''.) In an [[Jackie E-mails 6|e-mail to Jackie]], he expressed great pleasure when the ''ModNation'' experience system was patched to make certain trophies easier to acquire.

Counting duplicate games (like ports to different Sony consoles) and games separated into episodes, Chris has earned all the trophies in over 76 games on the PSN.

==Chris and PC Games==
Games for personal [[computers]] are conspicuously absent from Chris's collection and his evident game-playing habits. The only sign that he has ever even owned any PC games comes from his eBay account, which shows that he tried to auction off a collection of vintage ''Dungeons & Dragons'' role-playing games for the PC in the summer of 2008. He also owned a copy of the first ''[[Lego Island]]'' game for PC (as seen by his possession of the Infomaniac minifigure – which was only obtainable from early copies of the said game). In the [[Fanmail Reading]] video, after a [[troll|fan]] sent him a copy of ''[[wikipedia:Half-Life 2|Half-Life 2]]'', Chris explained, "I don't play PC games. I used to, but I don't anymore." He failed to indicate why he gave them up, though. In [[Mumble 1|his first Mumble chat]], he claimed to "remember ''[[wikipedia:Touhou|Touhou]]''", but later backpedaled and said "I never really heard of that."

In his early childhood years, Chris routinely played video games on a [[Commodore 64]] computer and even remembered playing educational games such as ''Number Munchers'' and ''The Oregon Trail'' on an Apple II computer at [[Chris's education#Greene County Primary School|Greene County Primary School]] (admitting to a preference for the C64)<ref>[[Warhol Tweets#Chris larps as his younger self]]</ref>. In [[January 2026]], he would purchase and [[Commodore 64 Ultimate Review|later review]] its modern remake, the Commodore 64 Ultimate.

Due to the influence of the [[Idea Guys]] and him acquiring a decent computer, Chris has picked up PC gaming. He has a [[Steam]] profile, and has played titles like ''Payday 2'' and some ''Sonic'' games.<ref>[[:File:Steam - ChrisChanSonichu - Games - 7Dec2017.png]]</ref>

==Chris, the Industry Insider==
Chris gets most of his information about the gaming industry from comparatively mainstream sources. He was an avid reader of ''Game Informer'' magazine. As for publications and/or other media sources that have since gone defunct, he was also a dedicated consumer of Sony's interactive online magazine ''Qore'', was a longtime ''[[Nintendo Power]]'' subscriber, and regularly followed the G4 cable network. Chris even apparently took the {{w|Spike Video Game Awards}} (later reorganized into the ''slightly'' more reputable {{w|The Game Awards|Game Awards}}) seriously,<ref>[[Congrats, Jack Black]]</ref> which puts him about five years behind anybody with even a passing interest in the games' business.

==Chris, the Game Designer==
{{main|Sonichu (game)|Christian Weston Chandler's Adult Chronicles}}

At various times, especially during the [[Miyamoto saga]], but going as far back as the late 1990s (when he had a prophetic dream of a Sonic game for the Game Boy), Chris has imagined that he could launch himself into a career as a game designer. It is telling, however, that nearly all of his "ideas" for potential video game projects simply involve swapping Sonichu or other Chris-spawned characters into an existing game concept. ''[[Pokémon: Lightning Version]]'' is a Pokémon RPG with Sonichu in it. ''[[Sonichu Adventure]]'' is ''Sonic Adventure'' with Sonichu in it. ''[[John's Custom Gundam: Sisterly Rescue]]'' is ''Gundam: Journey to Jaburo'' with [[Megan Schroeder|Megan's]] quasi-retarded brother in it, and so on.

The closest he has gotten to coming up with something like an original idea is ''[[Christian Weston Chandler's Adult Chronicles]]'', and it is not actually known what that game is supposed to amount to, beyond what Chris drew on the cover, and occasional haphazard mentions. It is entirely possible that the answer is unknown to Chris himself.

Nevertheless, Chris sincerely believes that his characters and game ideas are ready for commercial success. He once rejected an e-mail from the Mailbag that brought up the notion of a not-for-profit fan-made Sonichu game, and brushed off similar suggestions in his first [[IRC (16 October 2008)|IRC fan chat]]. In [[Chris dispels videogame rumors|the video about dispelling rumors of an official Sonichu game]], he scoffed at the idea of his game ideas being made with 2D graphics.

===Modding and Customization===
One of the great ironies of Chris's existence is that he loves to create and share his creations, even though he possesses almost no genuine innate creativity. He tends to gravitate strongly towards video games that allow him to create his own content and share it online.

Since console games are often not modifiable, while PC game modding tends to demand more technical skill than he possesses, Chris has only been able to show off his creativity in this field so much. That said, the PS3 games ''LittleBigPlanet'' and ''[[ModNation Racers]]'' exerted a powerful grip on him with their customization capabilities. Chris made a ton of levels in ''LittleBigPlanet,'' dropping out of sight for the better part of a month when he first acquired the retail version of the game. Likewise, he has made levels, characters and custom cars for ''ModNation Racers'', and it resulted in a similar disappearance during the summer of 2010. His output has not shown too much actual competence, but it is not for lack of time and effort spent.

Even in games that offer only light customization features, Chris makes a point of personalizing his experience as much as possible. He spent considerable time on a ''Guitar Hero'' band, up to drawing [[CWCRockin4Way.jpg|disturbing pictures]] of his virtual bandmates. The amount of time he spent on tweaking his ''Animal Crossing'' villages is simply colossal. According to the [[Regina e-mails]], Chris made a similarly big deal about ''F-Zero GX'' and ''Jet Set Radio'', even though both games limit their customization options to things like swapping around car parts or personalizing small decals.

Likewise, as the gallery below displays, Chris enjoys customizing his game hardware. He has splattered Sonichu artwork all over his GameCube, a Nintendo DS, a couple of Game Boy Advances, a PSP, his now-deceased original PS3, and possibly other consoles or handhelds. One of his [[Pokéwalker of Fail|Pokéwalkers]] also appears to have received the Sonichu treatment, being repainted in blue and yellow.

====Sonic World====
Chris became interested in the ''Sonic the Hedgehog'' fan game and modding project [[Sonic World]] in late 2020. After joining its [[Discord]] group, he requested creators make based on Sonichu and his female obsession at the time, [[ProjectSNT]]. In December of that year, Chris found a Sonichu mod and wished to add his voice acting into it. While he did want to get into contact with the original creator and ask if he could add to the mod, Chris opted going without permission and downloaded the mod, replaced the original voice clips with his own, and reposted it. Because of the original mod's appropriation, Chris was banned from the mod-hosting website GameBanana. He was banned from the Sonic World Discord group not long after due to his passive-aggressive-yet-[[Messiah complex|megalomaniacal]] confrontation with the Sonichu mod's creator.

==Chris's Perception of Video Game Technology==
Chris obviously has no idea about how video games or video game consoles work. For example, as seen in a panel of ''Sonichu'' #10, he seems to think that games are interchangeable and can work on any console ("DO NOT BUY OR DOWNLOAD ILLEGAL COPIES OF L.B.P. ON Wii OR XBox360; IT IS PUNISHABLE BY LAW!"), even though he could easily check and see that he cannot play his copy of ''LittleBigPlanet'' on his Wii, although he is either too lazy, or is afraid of having [[14 Branchland Court|his house]] raided by [[jerkop]]s.

Neither is he aware of the technology's current capabilities. As stated in the survey of [[Chris and reality]], he once suggested that Nintendo should create a PokéBall peripheral which could display holographs, which can only be seen in science fiction, currently.

==Decline of gaming passion==
Chris's passion for gaming seems to have relatively subsided by the late 2010s. By 2020, it had been months since he touched his [[PS4]] and he didn't show much interest in the PlayStation 5's first and third-party titles. A look at his then-recent [[Twitter|tweets]] and [[Wish list]] suggested he was busy [[Television|binging TV shows and movies]]. However, Chris continued to regularly play ''[[Tetris 99]]'' on the [[Nintendo Switch]] from 2019 up until his arrest in 2021.

On 11 September 2020, during Chris's phase of role-playing as Sonichu, Chris was asked the following question in [[Discord Q&A 6]]:
{{quoteboxgreen|Dear Christine, are you getting any of the next gen consoles? If so, what games are you excited for?}}

Chris responded:

{{quoteboxyellow|Taking you mean the new [[Playstation|PS5]] or [[Hex-Box|XBox S]] generation of consoles; Mama had not really given that much thought, and I haven’t as much either, considering we’ll be in a [[COVID-19#Stopping the pandemic|new timeline free of this pandemic and all of that.]]}}

==During the jail saga==

During Chris's time behind bars, for perhaps the first time in his life, he was deprived of any ability to access his game collection. The various letters he sent to assorted acquaintances over the course of his confinement made little mention of his electronic hoard, and the status of his collection is itself unknown – with Chris having been away from his home for nearly six years (barring some post-jail visits to retrieve certain items), and reports that items belonging to him were thrown out of the house, there is every likelihood that the good majority of the games and consoles he cherished so dearly and intended to pass down to children of his own have simply been sold off, given away, or tossed in a landfill.

However, in an apparent bid to make the most of his newfound freedom after his release in March 2023, he was swift to visit a local Walmart and purchase another Nintendo Switch, according to an eyewitness account. This account was swiftly corroborated by others who posted images of Chris's online activity, images that paint an unsurprising picture; since his new acquisition, he has wasted little time catching up on games he has missed. Pokemon is front and center, as screenshots of his playtime hours and tweets he has posted suggest he has purchased at least four games within that franchise since leaving jail. This was clarified on the 26th of February 2024 when he posted photos of his entire on-console library to Twitter, confirming that since his release he has purchased ''Pokemon Legends Arceus'', ''Shining Pearl'' and ''Scarlet'' – despite insisting that he wouldn't even play the latter until his own imaginary Pokemon games are released – with the possibility of ''New Pokemon Snap'' also being a post-jail acquisition. He has also purchased several other titles that were released while he was behind bars, including but not limited to ''Metroid Dread'', ''Sonic Frontiers'', ''Superstars'' and ''Colors Ultimate'', and ''Life is Strange Remastered'' and ''True Colors''. Assuming these were bought from standard marketplaces and assuming standard Switch game prices, Chris stands to have spent anywhere from 40 to 60 dollars on each of these alone, to say nothing of acquiring an assortment of indie releases. In total, Chris has spent somewhere around $1500 on Switch games, not including the Switch itself, since his release from jail, raising the total spent to over $3500.

More curiously, his PSN profile was spotted as being active online after years of silence in August 2023, showing that he was dabbling with the demo version of Street Fighter 6 – on a PS''5'', despite Chris stating on a [[November 2023 livestreams#First JCWCSP Gaming Live Stream %E2%9A%A1%EF%B8%8F%F0%9F%92%99%E2%9A%A1%EF%B8%8F|November 2023 livestream]] that he does not yet own a PS5. Compared to his Switch usage, however, his passion for the Playstation still appears to have simmered; since his time in jail he has only half-heartedly experimented with a few Vocaloid games, before appearing to settle on using a PS4 as another way to play Minecraft. Chris uploaded a number of images in late 2023 detailing the interior of his [[Big Island House|new house in Big Island, VA]], and two of them feature a shelf containing several games for multiple consoles. From this image, it can be seen that alongside his Switch and PS4, he still owns an Xbox One and a PS3, both possibly collected from his old home. In addition, the games on the lowermost shelf appear to be for the PS Vita from their boxes, the shelf space they take up suggesting that Chris has significantly expanded the number of games he owns for it. Whether or not the PS Vita he has is the same one he acquired in 2012 is unknown.

Even so, this nevertheless shows that even after time away from his electronic stash, time in which self-reflection could have been carried out and in which he could have sworn himself to spending only in moderation, Chris is still entirely capable of flushing away hundreds on new consoles and games, still more than willing to pony up vast sums of money in support of his passions, even in the face of an extremely uncertain future. Old habits always die hard – at least, for Chris.

==Gallery==
<gallery>
Image:121-CWCsGamecube.jpg|GameCube skin
Image:122-CWCsGamecubeP2.jpg
Image:204-SonichuGBA2.jpg|GBA skin
Image:205-SonichuGBASP2.jpg
Image:CWCGameCube1.jpg
Image:CWCGameCube2.jpg
Image:CWCGameCube3.jpg
Image:CWCGameCube4.jpg
Image:CWCGameCube5.jpg
Image:CWCGameCube6.jpg
Image:092-PSPSonichu.jpg|[[PSP]] skins
Image:SonichuPSPCover.jpg
Image:282-ChaoticComboPSPWall.jpg
Image:518-PaRappa-the-Rapper-Um-Jammer-Lammy-PSP-Wallpaper.jpg
Image:Sonichugame.png
File:Mail4b.jpg|Pictures of Chris's PSN profile on the PS3
File:Mail6e.jpg
File:Mail3vah.jpg
File:Mail1lbf.jpg
File:Mail5.jpg
File:Mail2u.jpg
File:Maildma.jpg
</gallery>

==See also==
* [[List of Chris's video games]]
* [[List of Chris's PSN game downloads]]
* [[Club Nintendo]]
* [[Fandoms]]
* [[PlayStation 3]]

==References==
<references/>

==External links==
* [https://psnprofiles.com/Sonichu Chris's PlayStation Network profile]

{{Chris and}}
{{Health}}
{{TV}}
[[Category:Things bought with taxpayer money]]
[[Category:Things Chris likes]]
[[Category:Pages with fan videos]]
[[Category:Video Games]]

Brassieres For Males

2026-04-30T05:19:15Z

FromtheWordsofBR:

{{Honest}}

[[File:BFMCover.jpg|500px|center|thumb|The page cover photo uploaded on 12 [[September 2013]].]]

{{quote|I encourage Everyone to show their support by wearing a Sports Bra, and encouraging the uncovered [[JERKS|men]] to wear them as well.|[[Chris]], on 10 [[September 2013]].}}

'''Brassieres For Males''' is a ridiculous [[Facebook]] "community" page created in part by Chris on 23 [[August 2013]]. Chris shared the page on 10 [[September 2013]], at which point its existence became known by his fans. The page is dedicated to encouraging men to wear [[Muscle bra|sports bras]]. It is likely, given the language and syntax of many of the posts, that Chris had assistance in running the page from unknown figures. Most of the content was Chris whining about how men should [[Tomgirl pictures|wear women's clothing]], so that he wouldn't feel offended (read: so he would feel more comfortable with crossdressing himself). Chris seemed to forget about the site soon after sharing it, waiting a year before revisiting it, and then only sporadically.
[[File:Wavingclothes.jpg|thumb|200px|right|[[Chris and hypocrisy|Don't be like this man]].]]

==About the Page==
[[File:BFMProfile.jpg|thumb|The Facebook profile photo. Note how the words "Want Woman" are removed compared with [[:File:WantWoman.jpg|this photo]].]]
The original "About" page (sadly not screencapped in time) focused on Chris himself and his adamant opinions about men going topless. The original tagline was, '''"This is a page to support making it legally required for men of all ages to wear (sports) bras to cover their topless chests."''' Soon after its discovery, however, the "About" page was sanitized to mask Chris's egotism and imperiousness. Hints of the original tone remained in some of the site comments and images.

{{quotebox|
Welcome to Brassieres For Men, a support page for those who believe it should be proper and accepted for men to wear (sports) bras.

Brassieres for Men is a page [later changed to "a community of people"] which supports making it more proper and accepted for males of all ages and body types to wear (sports) bras. We would also like to see male characters on cable and public television wearing bras as a way to express identity or modesty.

Brassieres For Men believes that men face an unfair stigma when they choose to wear a brassiere or similar piece of clothing. Bras can benefit men/males in several ways:

--Sports bras prevent the chafing commonly experienced by joggers.

--Bras can provide support and relief for the wearer's chest and back.

--Some conditions cause males to develop larger breasts, which is often a cause of embarrassment. Bras designed for males (or sports bras in the appropriate size) can flatten or lessen the appearance of male breasts and help the wearer feel more confident. (Many males wear undershirts to accomplish this purpose, often with sub-optimal results.)

--Some males enjoy wearing brassieres as an expression of gender or sexual identity. Though this is a valid use, it is not the focus of this page.

--Anyone who wants to wear a bra, for whatever reason, should be free to do so!

Show your support by Liking this page and wearing a (sports) bra!

The Brassieres for Men Facebook page was founded by [[Christian Weston Chandler]]. A Note from the Founder:

"I started wearing sports bras a few years ago. As we grow older, regardless of how much we exercise, the human male will often have breasts that could fill an A- or B-Cup. I, myself, am a 42 B-Cup. Jokes have been made about them, even by [[Family Guy|Seth McFarlane]], but male breasts are not a thing to laugh at."

Thank you for visiting this page. Please Like and share your own experiences and thoughts!}}

==Photo Albums==
Within a few days of its discovery, a series of photo galleries had been established on the site. They were provided largely without comment, and it's unclear what message Chris was trying to send with them, especially after the editing of the original "About" page.

===Sample Male Chests/Breasts===
On 23 August 2013, the page started by posting a gallery of photos of male breasts and chests:
<center>
<gallery>
File:BFMMaleBreasts1.jpg|
File:BFMMaleBreasts2.jpg|
File:BFMMaleBreasts3.jpg|
File:BFMMaleBreasts4.jpg|
File:BFMMaleBreasts5.jpg|
File:BFMMaleBreasts6.jpg|
</gallery>
</center>

===Covered Sample Chests===
Another gallery showed ridiculous photos (most likely done using MS Paint) of men wearing bras.

<center><gallery>
File:Covered chests 1.jpg
File:Covered chests 2.jpg
File:Covered chests 3.jpg
File:Covered chests 4.jpg
File:Covered chests 5.jpg
File:Covered chests 6.jpg
</gallery></center>

===My own breasts===
Chris was kind enough to give us a gallery of his bosoms.

<center><gallery>
File:My breasts 1.jpg
File:BFMCover.jpg
File:BFMProfile.jpg
File:My breasts 2.jpg
</gallery></center>

On this last photo, Chris commented, "Taken YEARS ago, for a Theoretical Ex [[sweetheart|Girlfriend]]; Trolls got their hands on it, and yet this was (without my own permission or consent) shown on MTV's [[Chris in the media#Traditional media|Failosophy]]."

===Sports Bras===
<center><gallery>
File:Sports bras 1.jpg
File:Sports bras 2.jpg
File:Sports bras 3.jpg
</gallery></center>

===Male Bras===
<center><gallery>
File:Male bras 1.jpg
File:Male bras 2.jpg
File:Male bras 3.jpg
File:Male bras 4.jpg
File:Male bras 5.jpg
File:Male bras 6.jpg
File:Male bras 7.jpg
</gallery></center>

===Chests in the printed media===
These photos are apparently meant to show the prevalence of offensive male torsos in modern Western society (although there's also an image of a woman, so who knows). Chris scribbled out identifying information for the magazines and also made sure to censor the [[duck|groins]] of the male swimsuit models.
<center><gallery>
File:Chests media 1.jpg
File:Chests media 2.jpg
File:Chests media 3.jpg
File:Chests media 4.jpg
File:Chests media 5.jpg
File:Chests media 6.jpg
File:Chests media 7.jpg
File:Chests media 8.jpg
</gallery></center>

==Administrator Comments==
For several days after its discovery, the page administrator(s) made a number of comments clarifying the site's intent. Chris's presence was usually easy to detect based on syntax and the general dickishness of the comments. Much troll mockery was deleted.

===Sports bras are good===
{{quotebox|Sports Bras come in a number of varieties; they are available at stores like [[Wal-Mart]] and wherever bras are sold. There is no shame in asking for your own breast size.}}
{{quotebox|It's true that you need a bit of self confidence to purchase these as a man, but most people will assume you are buying them for a woman anyway. Women wear men's clothes quite often, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with men doing the same with women's clothes, when they can find it in their size. The only problem is in people's perceptions, which will never change if men do not take a stand!}}

One user asked a question:

{{quoteboxred|I asked about it on the timeline but how shall one buy a sports bra? I'm going to walmart tomorrow and want to know how the bra should feel and stuff. I'm a beginner who has resorted to wearing a cut up undershirt to cover my shame.}}
{{quotebox|I'll make a post about it now.}}

===Family Guy Video===
The "Sideboob Hour" scene from ''[[Family Guy]]'' was shared:
{{quotebox|This clip from "Family Guy" is enough to make one aware of the situation.
[[http://youtu.be/sEHHlGNUiB8]]}}

===Sports Bros===
The page admin referenced terms used in [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Doorman an episode] of [[Seinfeld]].
{{quotebox|If it makes you feel more comfortable, you may refer to the Sports Bras as "Bros" or "Manssieres"; whatever makes you feel more comfortable.}}
{{quotebox|Sports Bros!}}

===Encouraging===
{{quotebox|I encourage Everyone to show their support by wearing a Sports Bra, and encouraging the uncovered men to wear them as well.}}

One user asked:

{{quoteboxred|What if a woman wanted to go around topless? I am just curious.}}
{{quotebox|'''[NAME REDACTED]''', unfortunately it's currently illegal for women to walk around topless (as I'm sure you know, so I'm not quite sure why you're asking the question.) The female body has been incredibly oversexualized, so women being topless both offends and arouses people, which is not productive in any way. Unless you want them to be aroused, in which case, mission accomplished.}}
{{quotebox|You could say the same for a woman who has exceptional breasts and wants the world to know. Our double standard in this country is ridiculous.}}

In response to another question, the anonymous administrator said:

{{quotebox|'''[NAME REDACTED]''', just do whatever you feel comfortable with. If your wife loves you, she will want that for you.}}

And:

{{quotebox|Well spoken. Maybe you can find a compromise so that you can both be happy.}}

===Magic Mike===
This post was clearly made by Chris. He provides photographic evidence that he has taken to vandalizing store merchandise, an eerie foreshadowing of a [[Sonic Boom Protests|later crusade]].
{{quotebox|
[[File:Bra vandalism.jpg|thumb|left]]
Even the cover of the movie's DVD, ugh, "Magic Mike", REALLY infuriated me the number of weeks since it was released. I had been putting another DVD in front of it, so I wouldn't have to look at those topless dudes.}}

===Support Wearing Bras!===
The page admin then complained about other men feeling uncomfortable wearing bras:
{{quotebox|The only reason men feel uncomfortable wearing bras is because society has deemed it unacceptable, exclusively ladies' wear. But stop to think about it for a moment; at its most basic, what is the purpose of a bra? Support and containment! There is no reason a man should feel ashamed of wearing a bra. If a man has some boobage, it's only logical that he should want to support or contain it. All men should be able to wear any style bra or support he likes, whether it is a more feminine type or merely a compression shirt. Sports bras are actually a brilliant solution for those who can't afford expensive compression shirts. Let's work on removing the stigma surrounding men wearing bras, and instead of shaming them, support them! Just like a bra. (In both the surfer and apparel sense)}}

Two users asked some questions, one on 13 September and another three days later:

{{quoteboxred|They make compression shirts. Look up Under Armor. I'm all for wearing what feels right but a guy should get to know his options before he feels restriced to just a bra for support. Could you add a link to them in your next page update?}}
{{quotebox|There is already a link for them, look around.}}

{{quoteboxgreen|what about males that have flat chests?}}
{{quotebox|If they want to wear a bra anyway, let them! Some men get embarrassed if their nipples are showing through their shirt, and a bra can be helpful in that regard.}}

When someone pointed out that diet and exercise would make male bras unnecessary, the admin responded:

{{quotebox|
Okay, but that fact changes nothing. And actually, some men can get moobs even when they are not overweight. Either way, if the moobs are there, a bra we'll wear. ;)}}

===Feminine Style Bras===
The page admin then shared some links:
{{quotebox|Cute feminine style bras for men can be purchased here. Some are even padded to give the appearance of strong pectoral muscles.

<nowiki>http://www.hommemystere.com/store/categories/Bras/</nowiki>}}

===Gynecomastia===
{{quotebox|http://manbra.net/ is a blog filled with information about Gynecomastia. You are not alone!}}

and:

{{quotebox|This is a great site for men who prefer a more masculine form of containment. There is something for everyone out there! http://www.mensbreast.com/}}

===Wal-Mart===
{{quotebox|Walmart has an incredibly wide selection of bras, and many have a more masculine look to them. Browse the site and check out your options!

<nowiki>http://www.walmart.com/browse/intimates/bras/5438_1078024_1078025?_refineresult=true&ic=32_0&path=0%3A5438&facet=style%3ASports&povid=cat1078024-env388472-moduleA032813-lLinkLHNBras6Sports</nowiki>}}

===Bra Sizing===
{{quotebox|Bra sizing: First of all, remember that you can return ANYTHING to Wal-Mart! So it might be a good idea to purchase a few different sizes of bras to try on at home, and return the ones that do not fit. It's a bit of trial-and-error at first, but you'll find your size soon enough! Now for the explanation:

Most bras are sized in two ways: the letter, which denotes cup size, and the number, which denotes the diameter of the chest. To know what bra size you are without having to try them on in public first, take a tape measure and measure your chest "cannon", that is to say, wrap the tape around your back and to your front, just below your "man"maries. This number is your chest size, which often will convert quite closely to the bra sizes.

For the cup size, place your hands over your moobs. If you can get a good handful, you are probably a B cup. If it's just enough to fill your palm, you're probably an A cup. Don't be afraid to try for a C cup though! For those who are more overweight, oftentimes a C cup is necessary.

When it comes to sports bra sizing, many are in the types of size you're familiar with--XS through XXL. The handy thing about sports bras is you can usually tell by holding it up to your chest whether it will fit or not.

Sports bras should fit snugly but not feel as though they are asphyxiating you or cutting off circulation. They are meant to lend support by compressing the breasts, but too tight and they can become quite unpleasant. As mentioned in the beginning, if you aren't comfortable with trying them on in the store, purchase a few different sizes and try them on at home.

Happy shopping!}}
One user posted on the same day:
{{quoteboxred|Thank you so much for this tutorial. I'm going to make a video about my solution before I was convinced for you to get a sports bra. Thank you so much!}}
{{quotebox|Happy to help!}}

Another user posted this six days later:
{{quoteboxgreen|Would you mind sharing too that not all brands measure the same A Hanes 34B size may not be the exact same size as say, a 34B Fruit of the Loom. There's no worse feeling than having an elastic band digging into your ribcage.}}
{{quotebox|Definitely true. Don't try to force a size that just doesn't fit!}}

===Wikipedia On Male Bras===
{{quotebox|Educate y'allselves!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Male_bra}}

===Ryan Gosling===
{{quotebox|Ryan Gosling wears a man bra. Okay so maybe he doesn't. BUT WE CAN'T KNOW FOR SURE}}

===A Shoutout===
{{Notice|This links to [https://www.facebook.com/martin.wilson.9809/videos/346664565469097/ a video] that should be properly archived.}}
The page admin shared a video from a user talking about purchasing a bra to cover his "nippy slips":
{{quotebox|<nowiki>https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=346664565469097</nowiki>}}

===Bullying, Autism, and Mocking===
To counter the rash of trolling, the page admin posted the following:

{{quotebox|Those who attempt to troll or mock will be banned. And it's very easy to tell. If you came here just to continue to bully an [[autism|Autistic man]], then I think you need to look at your life and figure out at what point you thought it would be okay to treat someone that way.}}
{{quotebox|The purpose of this page is clear, and if you don't like it, nobody's making you stay.}}

One user responded:

{{quoteboxgreen|You know you are distracting the purpose of this page by writing this. People already know who this was made for, how do you know everybody here is just pulling your legs}}

The admin replied:

{{quotebox|almost 7 years of experience}}

Another user posted:

{{quoteboxred|Actually the purpose is a bit mystifying. It seems to be a page supporting Gynecomastia. However, half the pictures are of rather fit men without Gynecomastia. Under the Magic Mike photo you seem to imply topless men are disgusting. This seems to go against a number of your updates. Unless this is a parody page i'm unsure what you are going for here.}}

The admin responded:

{{quotebox|'''[NAME REDACTED]''', perhaps you should read the "about" page and description. Then you will have a better idea of what our purpose for this page is--which, by the way, is entirely up to us.}}

Yet another concerned citizen asked:

{{quoteboxgreen|I just have to point this out, would this particular message not be like waving a red flag at a bull if you think that bullies or trolls will come here? I had no idea the man who opened this page was autistic (if that is what the message implies?) or if the creator of this page is referring to someone else that is being bullied? I'm not sure which one you're aiming at, I thought this page was about male bras, not autism? If this is about a friend of the creator of this page, then perhaps a different page would be created about autism unless the original post about autism and bullying was posted here by mistake.}}

Admin:

{{quotebox|We're saying it for the ones who are already here for that purpose.}}

Another user protested:

{{quoteboxred|So apparently we can't share our opinion that this is absolutely ridiculous? I work out, I'm in shape, I'm not covering up anything, bro.}}

Admin:

{{quotebox|The page is not here for people to share their opinion that aligns with most of the rest of the world's. It's here for those who agree with what the page stands for to come together and, among other things, support each other. What possible reason could you have for coming to this page and telling us something we don't care about hearing? We don't know you, so your opinion carries no weight and serves no purpose other than to be abrasive.}}

And furthermore:

{{quotebox|You don't get to make demands. And this page is not for fans of CWC, it's for supporters of the cause.}}

==Chris remembers the site exists==
After a long period of dormancy, the site saw new content in the second half of 2014 regarding Chris's new gender identity. These new posts, unlike the previous ones, were definitely written by Chris himself and were typically self-centered.

===Chris comes out===
{{quotebox|14 August 2014
I, Christian Weston Chandler, not discriminating, and have fully come out as a Lesbian Identified Man, or female soul/male body Intersex (it is Real, Google "Lesbian Identified Man"), and as a Full On [[Tomgirl|Cross-Dressing and Makeup Wearing]] Transexual, I am Officially in Full Support to the Human Rights Campaign (HRC) Cause! Sports Bras for ALL Men, and Skirts for all Men who feel most Comfortable in them, or want them!

HOO-RAH! I will walk in a Pride Parade as well (should one be made in my local area)!}}

When someone replied, "Tranny Pride!," Chris issued confirmation:

{{quotebox|
Tranny Pride, worldwide!}}

Another observer named Robert Stoner expressed some confusion:

{{quoteboxred|I don't understand why you would think being a "lesbian identified man" and a tranny, as well as wearing women's clothing are traits women would look for in a man.}}

This prompted the secret white knight administrator of the page to jump in and begin a dialogue:

{{quoteboxgreen|The women who are into trannies look for that.}}

Stoner:

{{quoteboxred|So you want male transexuals to want you?}}

Admin:

{{quoteboxgreen|I didn't say anything about transsexuals. Just talking about the women who are into trannies.}}

Stoner:

{{quoteboxred|So youre a female trapped inside a male's body?}}

Admin:

{{quoteboxgreen|Christian is, yes.}}

Stoner:

{{quoteboxred|Are you referring to yourself in the third person?}}

Admin:

{{quoteboxgreen|No, I'm one of the maintainers of Brassiers For Males.}}

Kenneth had to say:

{{quoteboxred|I don't think Christian fully grasps what transgender means. Genuine transgendered shows up as differences in brain structure in comparison to a non-transgendered person. These differences can actually be seen on a brain scan. With all due respect, it's all well and good that he supports equal rights. There's nothing at all wrong with that. But my guess is that there are other factors going on here that are the real drivers.}}

The administrator replied:

{{quoteboxgreen|We here at Brassieres For Males are not interested in your opinion. Whatever Christian's true diagnosis is, he'll figure out for himself, without you commenting on it.}}

Ken:

{{quoteboxred|Has CWC considered dating a transgender (Male to Female)? Maybe it might give him some more insight into transgendered.}}

Admin:

{{quoteboxgreen|Yes.}}

===Chris goes to a pride festival===
A month later, Chris cross-posted from his personal page, with added relevant information:

{{quotebox|13 September 2014
I was at the Pride Festival today, and I really felt accepted and liked among the LGBT community; like I do belong there as the Lesbian Transgender that I am, and a lot of real women there showed me kindness and respect. I feel better about myself for that. But I was not in the mental state to meet new people yet, but I did make some acquaintances; talked with some of them for a bit. But I do feel that I really want to do more with the community, so I may join up with the [[Cville Pride|C-Ville Pride]], or something; I have some pamphlets and details. I will make my own decisions!

Not only that, I maintained my Modesty by wearing MY Bras every day, including today!!!

‪#‎WEAREHRC‬}}

===Now you have to wear skirts too===
A month after that, Chris felt compelled to return to the site to post a long musing in which he contemplated other fashion accessories for men:
[[File:Bras 4.jpg|240px|right]]

{{quotebox|19 October 2014
I was thinking more about Modesty, amongst the common Male. Besides the fact that their top portions should still be covered to less offend those, including myself, who feel and have been feeling offended with topless male nudity. There is Another amongst the common Male that should still be considered more concealed from those sensitive to them as well. [[pickle|The bulge]].

The bulge Definitely remains obvious even regardless of what kind of pants they wear. Even opaque Leggings alone would not suffice to keep that covered up. But I have found in my own personal expression of my Lesbian Transgender sexuality, that Leggings AND Skirts together can better conceal the bulge.

The skirt is more loose outwardly, so even if it becomes aroused, to use the term loosely, the bulge becomes less obvious to tell. Also, I like to hide [[duck|my long, ugly growth]] underneath my [[Un-clit|taint]], tucked between the skin and my underwear. This also helps in better being able to look down and Not have to look at the darn thing.

I am not saying males HAVE TO wear skirts and leggings, but in the name of Modesty, it would be beneficial. And, y'all will be able to better feel the breeze of the air on your legs and lower region, which is good. And with the light chill getting there, y'all may find [[semen|better seed population growth]] there as well. Again, using the term loosely.

So, take a page from my book of life for your consideration; skirts and leggings for better Modesty.

Males do Not have to be such offensive show-offs. That is so stereotypical of them to Be Show-Offs; prove yourself Not Stereotypical, And More Modest.

Have a good and safe day.}}

When a commenter complained that he didn't want to wear leggings, Chris replied:

{{quotebox|
Well, then, Don't wear Leggings.

Why must you put me down?}}

===A request===
Despite the new attention Chris was paying to the site, he seemed somewhat distant from it.

{{quotebox|20 October 2014
People! If you want to contact me directly, do so from my own personal page.}}

===Don't free the nipple===

By the end of 2014, Chris's personal page no longer provided a link to Brassieres For Males. Yet in the Spring of 2015, he returned again, and reaffirmed his commitment to male modesty. He cross-posted this note on his personal Facebook page.

{{quotebox|13 April 2015
[[File:11159486 841302929297521 3754185787838158301 n.jpg|right|250px|thumb]]
I do not mean to be offensive, and I do side with the women on the debate. ‪#‎Freethenipple‬ is one that requestions the position of the nipple. I do agree on equal rights here (what is good for one is good for the other there). But, in reasonable discussion, the same result could be achieved with encouraging Males to Cover Their Nipples. Which of my own offense at that visual display that had gone on for too damn long of the stereotypical Male. And that was one big reason why I started the #‎BrassieresForMales‬ group on Facebook over a year ago! I feel it good, I'm agreement of what the women are hoping to achieve, yet in appropriate and ironic twist, Males should post selfies of themselves wearing a brassiere. I won't be the host on this side of the debate (it's not one of my better talents), but I will, however, initiate the agreement to women's ‪#‎Freetenipple‬, with an appropriate counter of #BrassieresForMales.

I, will remain neutral in the matter, because I Do agree with [[women's rights]], and I personally want to see Males be more Modest in their appearances (nobody is impressed with their showing off). And I sincerely would vote with the majority, because we all Would win either way.

Thank you.

<nowiki>#</nowiki>BrassieresForMales

<nowiki>#</nowiki>Freethenipple

‪#‎ToplessTuesday‬}}

===Male Lingerie===
On 5 May 2015, Chris shared a [http://www.dose.com/lists/16355/Male-Lingerie-Is-A-Thing-Now-And-It-s-Kind-Of-Amazing?utm_source=FBTraffic&utm_medium=fijifrost&utm_campaign=CMfacebook&ts_pid=2 link] to an article called "Male Lingerie Is A Thing Now And It's Kind of Amazing."

===Topless Tuesday===
On 12 May 2015, Chris uploaded an image celebrating Topless Tuesday for his page's followers. The post was deleted within 15 minutes. Eat up, ladies.

{{quotebox|12 May 2015
[[File:ToplessTuesday.jpg|left|300px|thumb]]
<nowiki>#</nowiki>Topless Tuesday

From [[Wikipedia:Archie Comics|Betty]] "B"s to [[Wikipedia:Daria|Daria]] "D"s, enjoy my treats, ladies!

(And if you feel disgust instead, then that validates further my original cause of covering up the topless male). Power to Modesty!}}

===Equality: For Women Only===
[[File:D-Cup Manboobs.jpg|thumb|right|The photo he dared Facebook to delete.]]
Chris shared a [[July 2015 Facebook Posts#Swinging at a D-Cup Level|post]] on his personal Facebook page trying to demonstrate that his breasts were those of a woman, and therefore, according to Facebook standards, should be censored.

{{quotebox|9 July 2015
We, the women, should all be respected equal, regardless of physical body.}}

Since his shared post was, in fact, quickly deleted, this one quickly disappeared too.

===Nudity Reports===
On 12 July 2015, Chris added without comment two essentially identical photos pertaining to Facebook's response to reports that his naked manboobs violated community standards. It's not clear what point he was trying to make.

<gallery>
File:NudityReportA.jpg
File:NudityReportB.jpg
</gallery>

==See also==
*[[Muscle bra]]
*[[04232010 - Autism Awareness & Men Should NEVER be Topless]]

==External Links==
*[https://www.facebook.com/BrassieresForMales The Facebook page.]
*[http://www.mensbreast.com/ The website according to the page's contact info.]

{{Social media}}

[[Category:Facebook]]