Sony

2010-08-31T16:27:08Z

Golbolco:

''Sony is an electronics company. It is not to be confused with [[Sonee]], the pre-evolution of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]].''

'''Sony Corporation''' (or as Chris used to called it, "Playstation people") is one of [[Chris]]'s game company hardons. Creators of the [[PS3]], [[PSP]], and the [[PSEye]]. In a odd way, we have to blame Sony perhaps more than [[Nintendo]] for contributing to Chris's mental degradation (after all, Nintendo never gave him a camera and unfiltered [[Internet]] access).

==The company and Chris==
{{quote|I HAVE DONE MY HOMEWORK, AND THE PLAYSTATION PEOPLE KNOW OF THEIR ERRORS.

JUSTICE WILL BE SERVED, OR I AM NOT [[autistic|AUTISTIC]].|Chris in [[PSN Blogs]]}}

<center>{{#ev:youtube|0mYPBbz2QXU}}</center>

As a company, Sony has [[troll]]ed Chris inadvertently several times. Perhaps the lulziest event in Chris Chan's life was the infamous [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown]] scandal. During the contest, [[Megan|rape was alleged]], [[Cole Smithey|family issues were brought to light]], and Chris... [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown#Master Onion A-La Mode|just watch]].

[[Image:Lbpsucks.JPG|thumb|300px|Thank you for helping me meet trolls.]]

This sequence marks the downfall of Chris into even further madness. Before, he was a creepy dude who lived with his parents; after that we saw that he was a [[Homos|homophobic]], [[niggos|racist]], [[Autism|retarded]] irrational manchild. '''Thanks, Sony. Thanks a lot.'''

In the video [[NO D*** WAY, IMPOSTOR!!!]], Chris appealed to Sony (as well as to Nintendo and even [[Microsoft]]) to stop the trolls.

In [[Mailbag 10]], Chris proudly saved stuff on his [[wikipedia:Memory Stick|Memory Stick Duo™®©]]. Meanwhile, the rest of the world unabashedly continued to use SD cards, or preferred to not tell everybody what card type they used. (Some of us are a bit ashamed to still use CompactFlash. ''But at least it's not Memory Stick.'')

In [[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke]], we finally find out via a close-up of the bezel of Chris's 32" LCD TV which was purchased in September 2009 that even his television is a Sony. Because of the high price of Sony television sets (at least near $1,000 for even a lower-tier model), this means [[Bob]] threw a nice chunk of change toward another quality gift for Chris.

While Chris plugs many [[Axe|products]] (and never receives payment for doing so), none are more prominently displayed than the PS3. This four hundred dollar [[LittleBigPlanet|soul stealer]] has been subject to many, many [[Chris humps his PS3|creepy forms]] of idolization. One would wonder why Chris thinks Sony would '''ever''' want to appear in anything made by a man who [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|soils himself]].

Interestingly, Chris was not always a blindly devoted fan of Sony. In the [[Animal Crossing Documentary]], we see that back in [[2003]], Chris pledged his allegiance to Nintendo and the Gamecube, stating that both forerunners to the PS3 stank as much as the original [[Hex Bawx|Xbox]]. It is unknown at which point Chris defected to Sony, nor the reasons for doing so.

In August 2010, an employee at Sony of [[America]] allegedly accidentally trolled Chris into [[Stardate, August 27, 2010|formatting his hard drive]].

{{clear}}

==See also==
*''[[Eye of Judgement]]''
*''[[God of War]]''
*''[[LittleBigPlanet]]''
*[[Video games]]

[[Category:Chris-chan]]
[[Category:Sony]]

Cherokian Clan

2010-08-23T14:21:51Z

Golbolco:

[[Image:CherokeeChris.jpg|thumb|right|Chris celebrating his Cherokee ancestry by donning traditional clothing.]]
[[Chris]] claims to have at least one ancestor who is Cherokee. Thus, the '''Cherokian Clan''' is the tribe he believes this ancestor belongs to. The ancient exploits of the clan figure heavily into the mythology of the ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' comics.

The primary rival tribe of the Cherokian Clan was the [[Wasabi Clan]], which Chris stole from ''Naruto''.

==Fictional history==
[[Image:Chrisansestore.jpg|thumb|right|Cherokians have heads bigger than their torsos, arms thicker than their legs, and still manage to wear ill-fitting clothing. Seriously.]]
[[Image:160-ChrokiChanCard.jpg|thumb|...and they have MyLittlePony fursonas.]]
[[Image:159-ChrokiChan.jpg|thumb]]

Apparently living in what is now [[Virginia]] many centuries ago, the Cherokians (pronounced /tʃəˈɹɑkiən/ - chuh-rock-ee-uhn by Chris) possessed considerable mystical powers and skill for prophecy. The Cherokee leader, Christian's ancestor, wore a coveted [[Cherokian crown]] which somewhat resembled the ears of [[Sonichu]], suggesting that there is more than meets the eye to Christian's creation.

The Cherokians and Wasabi fought frequently over both the crown and the Cherokian queen, whom the Wasabi leader wanted as his own. Despite this, the Cherokians and Wasabi joined forces to defeat and imprison their mutual enemy, [[Count Graduon]].

Recognizing that Graduon could someday again threaten mankind, the Cherokians wrote the [[Anchuent Prophecy]], describing the exact circumstances of Graduon's escape and the identity of the individuals who would summon the power to defeat him. The prophecy was locked away in the Destiny Cave somewhere near the future site of [[CWCville]], Virginia, along with the Fireshock Pendant and Lightning Bracelets that would empower two of the three "electric creatures" fated to stop Graduon.

==Seriously?==
Chris is among a very large number of Americans — most of whom aren't autistic man-children — who claim to have some distant Native American heritage. In particular, it is especially common for many white and [[Niggos|black]] people, and especially in the South, to specifically claim Cherokee heritage. How accurate all of those claims are is another matter. At least in some cases, it is more likely that the "Cherokee ancestor" is a cover for having a distant black ancestor (if the person claiming the ancestry is white) or white ancestry (if the person claiming it is black).

In Chris's case, it needs to be noted that he also claims to be descended from [[Anne Boleyn]], whose only offspring, as Wikipedia reminds us, died without children (...so, in a spiritual sense, he might in fact be ''her'' descendant; however, she chose to abstain instead of going on a [[Love quest|fucktarded wild goose chase]]). And for someone who takes pride in his Cherokee ancestry, he is remarkably ignorant regarding actual Cherokees, who resemble Chris's Cherokees the way the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki resemble the American Godzilla remake. He depicts the [[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan]] as white and blue-eyed, referring to Cherokee artifacts, customs, and people with the dubious demonym "Cherokian," and, oh, ''slathering them in '''solid gold''' Sonichu-themed jewelery and armor.'' You know, like so many Indians were known to wear.

If you're surprised at the sheer ignorance someone can be of pop culture to the point of not picking up on Indian clichés, pay more attention. Further, given his notorious disdain for education, he either forgot or didn't pay attention to lessons on actual Native American history or culture, which is taught in most American elementary/primary schools. And last, he's a colossal narcissist, and so may think that his Cherokee (or, ahem, "Cherokian") ancestors were blue-eyed white men decked in gold because he's a blue-eyed white guy who doesn't have a breastplate made of solid gold, but would appreciate one if it could get him chicks. Which, admittedly, would be much more effective than [[Attraction Sign|his old methods.]]

In his defense, [[Chris's Big Night Out|recent events have shown]] that Chris takes his [[Alcohol|firewater]] about as well as the Indians did.

When a letter in the [[mailbag]] asked to explain his inaccuracies regarding the Cherokee people and how he came to presenting them in the comics the way he did, Chris offered that he didn't know as much about the Cherokees as he possibly could. He doesn't admit that he was blindingly, mind numbingly ''wrong'', simply that there might be a few facts he glossed over.

==The Cherokee respond to Christian's claims about his heritage==

<center>{{#ev:youtube|fRXroiXFTWs}}</center>

==See also==
*[[Cherokian Crown]]
*[[Wasabi Clan]]
*[[War Paint Video]]

==External links==
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UUQ0O7gPKMA Cherokee Chris-chan]

{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:CWC-isms]]
[[Category:Plot Devices]]

CWCki - User contributions [en]

Sony

Cherokian Clan