CWCki - User contributions [en]

2013

2013-11-06T13:08:43Z

Griffintown:

[[File:Facebook1.jpg|thumb|In '''2013''', Chris mourned his expulsion from [[The GAMe PLACe|Heaven]].]]
'''2013''' is the fifth year of organized trolling since Chris's discovery. However, like the [[2011|two]] [[2012|years]] before it, it began with nothing of note, ever since Chris began [[This is how the Trial went|serving out his sentence.]] It remains to be seen if this ordeal (which ended in July) will finally knock some sense into him, though judging from [[Red_Letter_CWC_Certified_Day|past experiences]], it seems pretty unlikely.

However, this year is still notable as being the year where Chris' ego would cause him to become alienated with the few people he has left as "friends" (namely, Anna and the congregation of his church). It even caused him to get chastised for his attention-whoring by a well-known voice actress from [[My Little Pony]] in April. Even the Wal-Mart store he frequents has had enough of him - an act of blatant vandalism by Chris caused him to be thrown out and banned from the store. With the death of Bob a couple of years ago and his once-enablers getting tired of his antics, Chris is headed down a road that many have tried and failed to warn him about - one where the number of people willing to tolerate him are getting fewer and fewer.

In May, an [http://imgur.com/a/1HYJJ Imgur account] of all of the Facebook posts made by Chris between 2012 and 2013 was revealed by Chris, shedding some light on what happened during Chris's radio silence since [[Bob_Chandler#Later_life_and_poor_health|the death of his father earlier in 2011]].

In August, Chris indicated that his health has taken a turn for the worse, which, when compounded with the other problems explained above, all point to one thing - The consequences of his actions [[Exercise|(or lack thereof)]] are finally beginning to catch up to him.

==January==
[[File:Mcdonalds.jpg|thumb|January sighting]]
*11 January 2013 - Chris changes his [[Facebook]] [[:File:Facebook1.jpg|picture]] [[:File:Facebook2.jpg|twice]] in one day.
*29 January 2013- Chris is spotted at local McDonald's.

==February==
*24 February 2013 - Chris [[Chris's birthday|turns 31]]

==March==
[[File:Chris march2013.jpg|thumb|Chris in March]]
*8 March 2013 - A photo of Chris in his tomgirl attire is featured on the fourth episode of [[Chris in the media#Failosophy|MTV's ''Failosophy'']].
*9 March 2013 - Chris goes to [http://madicon.org/ Madicon] held this year in Harrisonburg, VA. He's spotted by one of trolls, however no pictures are taken. On Facebook, he [[Facebook#Sonichu is not dead|insists]] that the ''Sonichu'' comic is not dead, despite two years without updates. He also [[:File:Failosophy.PNG|discovers]] that he was on MTV the previous day.
*28 March 2013 - Chris posts a public [[Facebook#Gay Marriage |Facebook message]] whining about repeat media coverage of the Supreme Court's [[:wikipedia:Hollingsworth v. Perry|Proposition 8]] and [[:wikipedia:United States v. Windsor|DOMA]] deliberations.
*30 March 2013 - An [[Other documents#Epistle to the Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|epistle]] from Chris to his [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|church]] is leaked on the CWCki forums. In the document Chris announces that he will be no longer going to church for a period of time. Details about the deterioration of Chris's relationships with his fellow parishioners and church staff are also revealed.

==April==
[[File:Haters to the left.jpg|thumb|250px|left|Chris in April 2013.]]
*4 April 2013 - Chris posts a [[Facebook#Game Place|a new Facebook note]], in which he says he has no more interest in the [[The GAMe PLACe]].
*20 April 2013 - Chris uploads two new Facebook pictures. One of them depicts him holding a sign that reads "Haters to the Left," and points to the viewer's right in typical Chris fashion, while the other one shows him holding a different sign that declares him "[his] own free [[Homos|bitch]]."
*29 April 2013 - Chris posts two Facebook notes. In the [[Facebook#Sega Mascot Contest |first one]] he expresses his outrage at the news of Sega planning to replace [[Sonic]] as their mascot, not realizing that the news story he is responding to is a fictional one posted on a parody website. In the [[Facebook#"The Trolls Who Cry Woman"|second note]] he bemoans of how he has been trolled in the past by people pretending to be women.

==May==
[[File:Chris facebook pic 5-29-13.jpg|thumb|Chris in May 2013.]]
*4 May 2013- Somebody named [[Anna|"mormonjesus"]] drops in IRC what seems to be [[Emails#2013|email]] Chris sent to [[Kim]] on 1 May.
*6 May 2013 - More [http://www.mediafire.com/view/?y1pp1lop9wx6hdv emails between Chris and Jackie] are leaked on the CWCki forums.
*19 May 2013 - The [[Maggie Thomas call]] which was made in [[September 2009]] was leaked by whispsonichu on the [[CWCki Forums]].
*21 May 2013 - Chris posts up pictures of his iPhone and his broken iPod on his Facebook account, complete with a custom made duct-tape folder for them.
*21 May 2013 - Chris unveils his latest creation, the [[Idea Book Case|iDea Book Case]], via Facebook.
*26 May 2013 - [http://imgur.com/a/1HYJJ An Imgur account] of Chris's formerly hidden Facebook status updates is revealed....by Chris himself.
*29 May 2013 - Chris changes his Facebook profile picture to one featuring the return of the [[Parappa the Rapper|Parappa]] hat.
*30 May 2013 - Chris makes a new Facebook post, laments that he had more freedom when his father was still alive, and goes onto complain about how he has to take time out of his day to "serve and protect" [[Barb|his mother]].
*31 May 2013 - The Nintendo-run website [[Flipnote Hatena]] shuts down. All flipnotes, including Chris's are no longer able to be shown. A troll let this site know a couple months earlier in order to save Chris's [[art]].

==June==
*6 June 2013 - Chris starts playing Toro's Friend Network and the game is linked to Facebook.
*7 June 2013 - Chris has made 20 friends in Toro's Friend Network according to his Facebook post. [http://i.imgur.com/EARZYtF.png (Link)]
*9 June 2013 -[[Anna]] posted on Facebook to Chris that she re-watched his [[DVD of Fail|DVD]] with her married friend. [http://i.imgur.com/lgxayJp.png (Link)]
*9 June 2013 - An [[Jackie E-mails 31|e-mail from Chris to Jackie]] on 7 [[September 2011]] was leaked on the [[CWCki Forums]], where Chris talked about his dream that according to the Grim Reaper, his [[Bob Chandler|father]]'s soul would not be claimed until the year 2015.
*11 June 2013 - Chris has made 30 friends in Toro's Friend Network according to his Facebook post. [http://i.imgur.com/1iFbV78.png (Link)]
*12 June 2013 - Chris has made 50 friends in Toro's Friend Network according to his Facebook post. [http://i.imgur.com/LAKqMX0.png (Link)] He is also earning #mPOINTS Rewards in Crackle. [http://i.imgur.com/tTcpJFF.png (Link)]
*13 June 2013 - Chris liked two videos: [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Oa8Nd6H0pU "I Heard the Dog Bark" by Sesame Street] and [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WlinLHR2yl4 My Little Pony Equestria Girls Official Trailer 2] on [[YouTube]] despite he once made a [[Facebook#THEY_ARE_NOT_SERIOUS.21.21.21|Facebook post raging about the Equestria Girls movie a few days ago]]. [http://i.imgur.com/kABCrhy.png (Link)] On the same day, [[Anna]] posts to her friends, including Chris to all go to Disneyland together. [http://i.imgur.com/5AQNS4V.png (Link)]
*16 June 2013 - A picture of [[Son-Chu]] which is photographed on Google Street View in [[June 2011]] is leaked on the [[CWCki Forums]].
*17 June 2013 - Chris posts another Facebook post that [[Facebook#I_am_feeling_very_lonely_again|he is lonely again.]]
*20 June 2013 - A video of [[14 Branchland Court|Chris's house]] on 8 June 2013 is leaked on the CWCki Forums.
*20 and 21 June 2013 - Hidden [[Twitter]] posts from 16 [[April 2012]] to 21 June 2013, which most of them are linked to the Facebook [[2013 Imgur Leak]] and pictures from 20 June 2013 are leaked on the CWCki Forums.
*22 June 2013 - Chris posts on [[Facebook#Too_many_Trolls_and_Bad_People_in_the_world|Facebook]] that "there are too many [[Trolls]] and Bad People in the world hiding behind the [[Internet]] constantly".
*24 June 2013 - Mary McLerran, relative of [[Anna McLerran|Anna]], posts to Chris on Facebook that she is sending him good energy. [http://i.imgur.com/LAZA08q.png (Link)]
*27 June 2013 - Chris makes a [[Facebook#A_skunk|Facebook]] post about a skunk.
*29 June 2013 - Chris complains to [[Cole Smithey]] on Twitter.

==July==
[[File:ChrisHowGoodLookingAmI.jpg|thumb|Chris in July 2013.]]
*7 July 2013 - Chris posts on [[Facebook#Ruckersville|Facebook]] about [[Ruckersville]]. On the same day, Chris liked the full movie of Equestria Girls on YouTube.
*10 July 2013 - Chris's year-long probation, [[28 October 2011|passed down by the court]], ended.
*14 July 2013 - Chris posts on [[Facebook#Very_Depressed.|Facebook]] that he is depressed and needs real compassion from women.
*18 July 2013 - Chris posts on [[Facebook#Don.27t_call_me_a_wet_blanket.|Facebook]] that he doesn't want people to call him a wet blanket.
*20 July 2013 - Chris posts on [[Facebook#Spring_Brakers|Facebook]] about ''[[Vanessa Hudgens|Spring Breakers]]'', bizarrely comparing it to [[My Little Pony]] and his life.
*22 July 2013 - Chris uploads a picture on [[Facebook#Stupid_Question.|Facebook]] and asks how good looking/attractive he is. He claims that he now weighs 220 pounds. On the same day, Chris shares a "Britney Spears - Ooh La La (From The Smurfs 2)" video. On the same day, Chris uploads a screenshot from the [[CWCki Forums]] on [[Facebook#The_results|Facebook]] about the results of the poll.
*24 July 2013 - Chris shared a Crackle page on Facebook. On the same day, Mary McLerran posts on [[Facebook#I.27m_sending_you_love.2C_too|Facebook]] that she loves the hand shape on Chris's profile picture.

==August==
[[File:ChrisChan27August.jpg|thumb|Chris in August 2013.]]
*3 August 2013 - William Elliott Waterman posts to Chris on [[Facebook#You.27re_a_real_nice_guy.2C_Chris|Facebook]].
*5 August 2013 - Chris posts some photos of his high school [[LEGO]] set on [[Facebook#LEGO_High_School|Facebook]].
*6 August 2013 - Chris shared some links of LEGO Heartlake High on [[Facebook#Heartlake_High|Facebook]]. On the same day, Chris posted on [[Facebook#One_of_my_pups_just_peed|Facebook]] that one of his [[Clover_and_Snoopy|pups]] just peed.
*7 August 2013 - Chris liked some videos of [[My Little Pony|Equestria Girls]], posted some posts related to the movie, and put it #2 of his Top Movies list. On the same day, William Elliott Waterman, one of Chris's friends posts a message to the DANG, DIRTY trolls on the CWCki on [[Facebook#William_Elliott_Waterman.27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE|Facebook]].
*9 August 2013 - Chris uploaded a photo of [[Manchester_High_School#Go_Lancers.21|"The Lancers"]] on Facebook, which is Chris's high school sports team.
*15 August 2013 - Chris uploaded photos of [[Wikipedia:Mark Cuban|Mark Cuban]], Lemon Pound Cake, and a logo of "University of Delaware <nowiki>Fightin'</nowiki> Blue Hens" on Twitter and Facebook.
*16 August 2013 - More random pictures were posted by Chris.
*17 August 2013 - Chris posts an absurd riddle on [[Twitter#17_August_2013|Twitter]] and [[Facebook#The_Riddle|Facebook]], which explains the random pictures he posted.
*18 August 2013 - Chris posts on [[Facebook#I_got_new_shoes|Facebook]] about his new shoes.
*19 August 2013 - Chris deleted the absurd riddle. On the same day, one of his new friends in [[Manchester High School]] posted to him on [[Facebook#Do_you_feel_like_your_winning_today.3F.21.3F|Facebook]]. Chris also posted a picture of his eyebrow on [[Facebook#One_Eyebrow|Facebook]].
*21 August 2013 - Another one of Chris's new friends in [[Manchester High School]] posted to him on [[Facebook#Fantastic_Gift_In_The_Mail_Today|Facebook]].
*22 August 2013 - One of Chris's new friends posted to Chris again on [[Facebook#Got_your_tunes.21|Facebook]].
*23 August 2013 - Chris posted on [[Facebook#Breast_Cancer_Awareness|Facebook]] about [[Breast Cancer Awareness]], and stating that [[Barbara Chandler|his mother]] is a survivor of breast cancer. On the same day, Chris posted a [[Facebook#Snoopy_Doobie_Doo|photo on Facebook]] involving his mother and Snoopy.
*27 August 2013 - Chris posted on [[Facebook#Losing Friends|Facebook]] about suffering from stress due to various reasons. On the same day, he updates his Facebook photo.

==September==
[[File:Back of Chris Chan 9-22-13.jpg|thumb|220px|Field agent observation, September 2013]]
*1 September 2013 - Chris posts on [[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Ten_A_Piece_For_Rainbow_Dash_And_Applejack|Facebook]] about his favourite ponies in [[My Little Pony]].
*2 September 2013 - Chris posts on [[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Offline_Troll.2FBully|Facebook]] cursing a [[Manajerk]], Rob Bell, [[Mary Lee Walsh]] and [[Megan Schroeder]]. Shorty after he [[CWCki Forums#September 2 FB update; New Troll to "Welcome"|informs the CWCki forums]] about this note. On the same day, Chris likes the [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6dQx6DenaXc Equestria Girls - Official Live Action Music Video (The Magic of Friendship)] on YouTube.
*3 September 2013 - Chris whines to one of his friends on [[September_2013_Facebook_Posts#14.2C386.2C443_out_of_a_possible_10|Facebook]] about his [[stress]], [[trolls]] and more, claiming that his blood pressure went up because of them.
*4 September 2013 - Chris posts a 1-star review of [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]] on [[September 2013 Facebook Posts#The_Nathanael_Greene_Elementary_School_Review|Facebook]], claiming that "The teachers, counselors, and Principal here back in the early 90s physically abused and attempted molestation upon me, mentally and emotionally scarring me for life".
*5 September 2013 - Chris's court information about the [[28 October 2011]] incident is updated. It seemed that Chris had been sentenced to 30 days confinement last year but the sentence was suspended and Chris paid a $247 fine instead.
*6 September 2013 - The second anniversary of [[Bob Chandler|Bob's]] death from heart failure. Chris also shared a link about autistic interactions on [[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Six_Rules_Regarding_Autistic_Interactions|Facebook]] and mentions his [[Autism Tutorial]] videos.On the same day, Chris makes a post on [[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Chris_Expresses_His_Outrage_for_Walmart|Facebook]] about how he has now been banned from Wal-Mart for vandalizing an XBox Live sign with a permanent marker.
*7 September 2013 - Chris makes a [[September 2013 Facebook Posts#God_Trolls_Chris_Yet_Again|Facebook post]] about how God made him scratch a woman's car in a parking lot. On the same day, some pictures of [[14 Branchland Court]] are leaked on the [[CWCki Forums]].
*8 September 2013 - Chris whines on a [[YouTube]] video [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J73NWDTvohI "Equestria Girls (Helping Twilight Win the Crown)" - MLP: Equestria Girls <nowiki>[My Little Rock Band]</nowiki>] that the PS3 versions of the song should be made.
*10 September 2013 - Chris shared a link to a ridiculous [[September_2013_Facebook_Posts#Brassieres_For_Males|Facebook]] page "Brassieres For Males", supporting [[JERKS|males]] to wear sports bras.
*11 September 2013 - Chris shared a [[September 2013 Facebook Posts|Facebook]] link to the movie "Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close", claiming that ''It is a touching and good movie to watch today.''
*17 September 2013 - Chris posts on [[September_2013_Facebook_Posts#Fans_are_Weird.2C_Part_1|Facebook]] that he has found a [[Sonic]] Underground DVD from either a troll or a fan which had been resting there for some time, as it was covered in rain water. He tells people that if they want to send him something, to put it in the newspaper box or have it shipped to his doorstep. He includes some visual aids and screencaps from ''[[Excel Saga]]''.
*18 September 2013 - Chris tries to see the "kre-o micro changers Series 1, 12 piece set complete" collection on [[eBay]] for $65.
*22 September 2013 - PCA, a [[CWCki Forums]] user, meets Chris in [[McDonald's]] in Charlottesville and provides two snapshots of him as a proof.
*24 September - Chris [[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Yep, the Bitch has not changed a thing...|posts a rant]] against [[Megan Schroeder]] on Facebook, revealing that he uses a Lego minifig of her as some sort of voodoo doll.
*27 September - Chris writes a new [[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Chris-Chan explains it all|Facebook post]] meant to correct what he sees as commonly held misconceptions about his past relationship with Megan.

==October==
[[File:Cwc1013.png|thumb|right|Chris in October 2013]]
*1 October 2013 - [[Barbara]]'s 72nd birthday.
*3 October 2013 - Chris posts [[October 2013 Facebook Posts#Megagi La Skunk agrees that you should have never been born|an angry Facebook rant]] directed at [[Megan]].
*4 October 2013 - Also blames Megan for the trolling and the [[Cwcki]].
*11 October 2013 - Chris posts a Facebook status debunking an impostor's claim that Chris was mugged during a short trip to the Philippines.
*25 October 2013 - Chris films [[CWC Lego Manchester High School Oct 18 2013]].
*28 October 2013 - Chris made a [[October_2013_Facebook_Posts#Another_Announcement|Facebook post]] to leave him alone.
*30 October 2013 - Chris revealed in a Facebook post that he has finally realized, after corresponding with them, that his [[high school]] [[gal-pals]] didn't really like him and were just playing [[Kick the Autistic|Pity the Autistic]].
*31 October 2013 - [[Halloween]]. Chris asks his former gal-pals to come to 14 Branchland Court and apologize.

==November==
*4 November 2013 -Chris posts to [[Facebook]] again asking the world to ignore his porn.
*5 October 2013 - Chris releases [[CWC Lego Manchester High School Oct 18 2013]] to the public.
*15 November 2013 - Release of the life upgrade, upgraded: the [[PS4]].

==December==
*25 December 2013 - [[Christmas]].

== Sources ==
<references/>

{{Timeline}}
[[Category:Chronology]]

2013

2013-11-06T13:07:27Z

Griffintown:

[[File:Facebook1.jpg|thumb|In '''2013''', Chris mourned his expulsion from [[The GAMe PLACe|Heaven]].]]
'''2013''' is the fifth year of organized trolling since Chris's discovery. However, like the [[2011|two]] [[2012|years]] before it, it began with nothing of note, ever since Chris began [[This is how the Trial went|serving out his sentence.]] It remains to be seen if this ordeal (which ended in July) will finally knock some sense into him, though judging from [[Red_Letter_CWC_Certified_Day|past experiences]], it seems pretty unlikely.

However, this year is still notable as being the year where Chris' ego would cause him to become alienated with the few people he has left as "friends" (namely, Anna and the congregation of his church). It even caused him to get chastised for his attention-whoring by a well-known voice actress from [[My Little Pony]] in April. Even the Wal-Mart store he frequents has had enough of him - an act of blatant vandalism by Chris caused him to be thrown out and banned from the store. With the death of Bob a couple of years ago and his once-enablers getting tired of his antics, Chris is headed down a road that many have tried and failed to warn him about - one where the number of people willing to tolerate him are getting fewer and fewer.

In May, an [http://imgur.com/a/1HYJJ Imgur account] of all of the Facebook posts made by Chris between 2012 and 2013 was revealed by Chris, shedding some light on what happened during Chris's radio silence since [[Bob_Chandler#Later_life_and_poor_health|the death of his father earlier in 2011]].

In August, Chris indicated that his health has taken a turn for the worse, which, when compounded with the other problems explained above, all point to one thing - The consequences of his actions [[Exercise|(or lack thereof)]] are finally beginning to catch up to him.

==January==
[[File:Mcdonalds.jpg|thumb|January sighting]]
*11 January 2013 - Chris changes his [[Facebook]] [[:File:Facebook1.jpg|picture]] [[:File:Facebook2.jpg|twice]] in one day.
*29 January 2013- Chris is spotted at local McDonald's.

==February==
*24 February 2013 - Chris [[Chris's birthday|turns 31]]

==March==
[[File:Chris march2013.jpg|thumb|Chris in March]]
*8 March 2013 - A photo of Chris in his tomgirl attire is featured on the fourth episode of [[Chris in the media#Failosophy|MTV's ''Failosophy'']].
*9 March 2013 - Chris goes to [http://madicon.org/ Madicon] held this year in Harrisonburg, VA. He's spotted by one of trolls, however no pictures are taken. On Facebook, he [[Facebook#Sonichu is not dead|insists]] that the ''Sonichu'' comic is not dead, despite two years without updates. He also [[:File:Failosophy.PNG|discovers]] that he was on MTV the previous day.
*28 March 2013 - Chris posts a public [[Facebook#Gay Marriage |Facebook message]] whining about repeat media coverage of the Supreme Court's [[:wikipedia:Hollingsworth v. Perry|Proposition 8]] and [[:wikipedia:United States v. Windsor|DOMA]] deliberations.
*30 March 2013 - An [[Other documents#Epistle to the Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|epistle]] from Chris to his [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|church]] is leaked on the CWCki forums. In the document Chris announces that he will be no longer going to church for a period of time. Details about the deterioration of Chris's relationships with his fellow parishioners and church staff are also revealed.

==April==
[[File:Haters to the left.jpg|thumb|250px|left|Chris in April 2013.]]
*4 April 2013 - Chris posts a [[Facebook#Game Place|a new Facebook note]], in which he says he has no more interest in the [[The GAMe PLACe]].
*20 April 2013 - Chris uploads two new Facebook pictures. One of them depicts him holding a sign that reads "Haters to the Left," and points to the viewer's right in typical Chris fashion, while the other one shows him holding a different sign that declares him "[his] own free [[Homos|bitch]]."
*29 April 2013 - Chris posts two Facebook notes. In the [[Facebook#Sega Mascot Contest |first one]] he expresses his outrage at the news of Sega planning to replace [[Sonic]] as their mascot, not realizing that the news story he is responding to is a fictional one posted on a parody website. In the [[Facebook#"The Trolls Who Cry Woman"|second note]] he bemoans of how he has been trolled in the past by people pretending to be women.

==May==
[[File:Chris facebook pic 5-29-13.jpg|thumb|Chris in May 2013.]]
*4 May 2013- Somebody named [[Anna|"mormonjesus"]] drops in IRC what seems to be [[Emails#2013|email]] Chris sent to [[Kim]] on 1 May.
*6 May 2013 - More [http://www.mediafire.com/view/?y1pp1lop9wx6hdv emails between Chris and Jackie] are leaked on the CWCki forums.
*19 May 2013 - The [[Maggie Thomas call]] which was made in [[September 2009]] was leaked by whispsonichu on the [[CWCki Forums]].
*21 May 2013 - Chris posts up pictures of his iPhone and his broken iPod on his Facebook account, complete with a custom made duct-tape folder for them.
*21 May 2013 - Chris unveils his latest creation, the [[Idea Book Case|iDea Book Case]], via Facebook.
*26 May 2013 - [http://imgur.com/a/1HYJJ An Imgur account] of Chris's formerly hidden Facebook status updates is revealed....by Chris himself.
*29 May 2013 - Chris changes his Facebook profile picture to one featuring the return of the [[Parappa the Rapper|Parappa]] hat.
*30 May 2013 - Chris makes a new Facebook post, laments that he had more freedom when his father was still alive, and goes onto complain about how he has to take time out of his day to "serve and protect" [[Barb|his mother]].
*31 May 2013 - The Nintendo-run website [[Flipnote Hatena]] shuts down. All flipnotes, including Chris's are no longer able to be shown. A troll let this site know a couple months earlier in order to save Chris's [[art]].

==June==
*6 June 2013 - Chris starts playing Toro's Friend Network and the game is linked to Facebook.
*7 June 2013 - Chris has made 20 friends in Toro's Friend Network according to his Facebook post. [http://i.imgur.com/EARZYtF.png (Link)]
*9 June 2013 -[[Anna]] posted on Facebook to Chris that she re-watched his [[DVD of Fail|DVD]] with her married friend. [http://i.imgur.com/lgxayJp.png (Link)]
*9 June 2013 - An [[Jackie E-mails 31|e-mail from Chris to Jackie]] on 7 [[September 2011]] was leaked on the [[CWCki Forums]], where Chris talked about his dream that according to the Grim Reaper, his [[Bob Chandler|father]]'s soul would not be claimed until the year 2015.
*11 June 2013 - Chris has made 30 friends in Toro's Friend Network according to his Facebook post. [http://i.imgur.com/1iFbV78.png (Link)]
*12 June 2013 - Chris has made 50 friends in Toro's Friend Network according to his Facebook post. [http://i.imgur.com/LAKqMX0.png (Link)] He is also earning #mPOINTS Rewards in Crackle. [http://i.imgur.com/tTcpJFF.png (Link)]
*13 June 2013 - Chris liked two videos: [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Oa8Nd6H0pU "I Heard the Dog Bark" by Sesame Street] and [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WlinLHR2yl4 My Little Pony Equestria Girls Official Trailer 2] on [[YouTube]] despite he once made a [[Facebook#THEY_ARE_NOT_SERIOUS.21.21.21|Facebook post raging about the Equestria Girls movie a few days ago]]. [http://i.imgur.com/kABCrhy.png (Link)] On the same day, [[Anna]] posts to her friends, including Chris to all go to Disneyland together. [http://i.imgur.com/5AQNS4V.png (Link)]
*16 June 2013 - A picture of [[Son-Chu]] which is photographed on Google Street View in [[June 2011]] is leaked on the [[CWCki Forums]].
*17 June 2013 - Chris posts another Facebook post that [[Facebook#I_am_feeling_very_lonely_again|he is lonely again.]]
*20 June 2013 - A video of [[14 Branchland Court|Chris's house]] on 8 June 2013 is leaked on the CWCki Forums.
*20 and 21 June 2013 - Hidden [[Twitter]] posts from 16 [[April 2012]] to 21 June 2013, which most of them are linked to the Facebook [[2013 Imgur Leak]] and pictures from 20 June 2013 are leaked on the CWCki Forums.
*22 June 2013 - Chris posts on [[Facebook#Too_many_Trolls_and_Bad_People_in_the_world|Facebook]] that "there are too many [[Trolls]] and Bad People in the world hiding behind the [[Internet]] constantly".
*24 June 2013 - Mary McLerran, relative of [[Anna McLerran|Anna]], posts to Chris on Facebook that she is sending him good energy. [http://i.imgur.com/LAZA08q.png (Link)]
*27 June 2013 - Chris makes a [[Facebook#A_skunk|Facebook]] post about a skunk.
*29 June 2013 - Chris complains to [[Cole Smithey]] on Twitter.

==July==
[[File:ChrisHowGoodLookingAmI.jpg|thumb|Chris in July 2013.]]
*7 July 2013 - Chris posts on [[Facebook#Ruckersville|Facebook]] about [[Ruckersville]]. On the same day, Chris liked the full movie of Equestria Girls on YouTube.
*10 July 2013 - Chris's year-long probation, [[28 October 2011|passed down by the court]], ended.
*14 July 2013 - Chris posts on [[Facebook#Very_Depressed.|Facebook]] that he is depressed and needs real compassion from women.
*18 July 2013 - Chris posts on [[Facebook#Don.27t_call_me_a_wet_blanket.|Facebook]] that he doesn't want people to call him a wet blanket.
*20 July 2013 - Chris posts on [[Facebook#Spring_Brakers|Facebook]] about ''[[Vanessa Hudgens|Spring Breakers]]'', bizarrely comparing it to [[My Little Pony]] and his life.
*22 July 2013 - Chris uploads a picture on [[Facebook#Stupid_Question.|Facebook]] and asks how good looking/attractive he is. He claims that he now weighs 220 pounds. On the same day, Chris shares a "Britney Spears - Ooh La La (From The Smurfs 2)" video. On the same day, Chris uploads a screenshot from the [[CWCki Forums]] on [[Facebook#The_results|Facebook]] about the results of the poll.
*24 July 2013 - Chris shared a Crackle page on Facebook. On the same day, Mary McLerran posts on [[Facebook#I.27m_sending_you_love.2C_too|Facebook]] that she loves the hand shape on Chris's profile picture.

==August==
[[File:ChrisChan27August.jpg|thumb|Chris in August 2013.]]
*3 August 2013 - William Elliott Waterman posts to Chris on [[Facebook#You.27re_a_real_nice_guy.2C_Chris|Facebook]].
*5 August 2013 - Chris posts some photos of his high school [[LEGO]] set on [[Facebook#LEGO_High_School|Facebook]].
*6 August 2013 - Chris shared some links of LEGO Heartlake High on [[Facebook#Heartlake_High|Facebook]]. On the same day, Chris posted on [[Facebook#One_of_my_pups_just_peed|Facebook]] that one of his [[Clover_and_Snoopy|pups]] just peed.
*7 August 2013 - Chris liked some videos of [[My Little Pony|Equestria Girls]], posted some posts related to the movie, and put it #2 of his Top Movies list. On the same day, William Elliott Waterman, one of Chris's friends posts a message to the DANG, DIRTY trolls on the CWCki on [[Facebook#William_Elliott_Waterman.27s_FUTURE_MESSAGE|Facebook]].
*9 August 2013 - Chris uploaded a photo of [[Manchester_High_School#Go_Lancers.21|"The Lancers"]] on Facebook, which is Chris's high school sports team.
*15 August 2013 - Chris uploaded photos of [[Wikipedia:Mark Cuban|Mark Cuban]], Lemon Pound Cake, and a logo of "University of Delaware <nowiki>Fightin'</nowiki> Blue Hens" on Twitter and Facebook.
*16 August 2013 - More random pictures were posted by Chris.
*17 August 2013 - Chris posts an absurd riddle on [[Twitter#17_August_2013|Twitter]] and [[Facebook#The_Riddle|Facebook]], which explains the random pictures he posted.
*18 August 2013 - Chris posts on [[Facebook#I_got_new_shoes|Facebook]] about his new shoes.
*19 August 2013 - Chris deleted the absurd riddle. On the same day, one of his new friends in [[Manchester High School]] posted to him on [[Facebook#Do_you_feel_like_your_winning_today.3F.21.3F|Facebook]]. Chris also posted a picture of his eyebrow on [[Facebook#One_Eyebrow|Facebook]].
*21 August 2013 - Another one of Chris's new friends in [[Manchester High School]] posted to him on [[Facebook#Fantastic_Gift_In_The_Mail_Today|Facebook]].
*22 August 2013 - One of Chris's new friends posted to Chris again on [[Facebook#Got_your_tunes.21|Facebook]].
*23 August 2013 - Chris posted on [[Facebook#Breast_Cancer_Awareness|Facebook]] about [[Breast Cancer Awareness]], and stating that [[Barbara Chandler|his mother]] is a survivor of breast cancer. On the same day, Chris posted a [[Facebook#Snoopy_Doobie_Doo|photo on Facebook]] involving his mother and Snoopy.
*27 August 2013 - Chris posted on [[Facebook#Losing Friends|Facebook]] about suffering from stress due to various reasons. On the same day, he updates his Facebook photo.

==September==
[[File:Back of Chris Chan 9-22-13.jpg|thumb|220px|Field agent observation, September 2013]]
*1 September 2013 - Chris posts on [[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Ten_A_Piece_For_Rainbow_Dash_And_Applejack|Facebook]] about his favourite ponies in [[My Little Pony]].
*2 September 2013 - Chris posts on [[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Offline_Troll.2FBully|Facebook]] cursing a [[Manajerk]], Rob Bell, [[Mary Lee Walsh]] and [[Megan Schroeder]]. Shorty after he [[CWCki Forums#September 2 FB update; New Troll to "Welcome"|informs the CWCki forums]] about this note. On the same day, Chris likes the [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6dQx6DenaXc Equestria Girls - Official Live Action Music Video (The Magic of Friendship)] on YouTube.
*3 September 2013 - Chris whines to one of his friends on [[September_2013_Facebook_Posts#14.2C386.2C443_out_of_a_possible_10|Facebook]] about his [[stress]], [[trolls]] and more, claiming that his blood pressure went up because of them.
*4 September 2013 - Chris posts a 1-star review of [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]] on [[September 2013 Facebook Posts#The_Nathanael_Greene_Elementary_School_Review|Facebook]], claiming that "The teachers, counselors, and Principal here back in the early 90s physically abused and attempted molestation upon me, mentally and emotionally scarring me for life".
*5 September 2013 - Chris's court information about the [[28 October 2011]] incident is updated. It seemed that Chris had been sentenced to 30 days confinement last year but the sentence was suspended and Chris paid a $247 fine instead.
*6 September 2013 - The second anniversary of [[Bob Chandler|Bob's]] death from heart failure. Chris also shared a link about autistic interactions on [[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Six_Rules_Regarding_Autistic_Interactions|Facebook]] and mentions his [[Autism Tutorial]] videos.On the same day, Chris makes a post on [[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Chris_Expresses_His_Outrage_for_Walmart|Facebook]] about how he has now been banned from Wal-Mart for vandalizing an XBox Live sign with a permanent marker.
*7 September 2013 - Chris makes a [[September 2013 Facebook Posts#God_Trolls_Chris_Yet_Again|Facebook post]] about how God made him scratch a woman's car in a parking lot. On the same day, some pictures of [[14 Branchland Court]] are leaked on the [[CWCki Forums]].
*8 September 2013 - Chris whines on a [[YouTube]] video [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J73NWDTvohI "Equestria Girls (Helping Twilight Win the Crown)" - MLP: Equestria Girls <nowiki>[My Little Rock Band]</nowiki>] that the PS3 versions of the song should be made.
*10 September 2013 - Chris shared a link to a ridiculous [[September_2013_Facebook_Posts#Brassieres_For_Males|Facebook]] page "Brassieres For Males", supporting [[JERKS|males]] to wear sports bras.
*11 September 2013 - Chris shared a [[September 2013 Facebook Posts|Facebook]] link to the movie "Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close", claiming that ''It is a touching and good movie to watch today.''
*17 September 2013 - Chris posts on [[September_2013_Facebook_Posts#Fans_are_Weird.2C_Part_1|Facebook]] that he has found a [[Sonic]] Underground DVD from either a troll or a fan which had been resting there for some time, as it was covered in rain water. He tells people that if they want to send him something, to put it in the newspaper box or have it shipped to his doorstep. He includes some visual aids and screencaps from ''[[Excel Saga]]''.
*18 September 2013 - Chris tries to see the "kre-o micro changers Series 1, 12 piece set complete" collection on [[eBay]] for $65.
*22 September 2013 - PCA, a [[CWCki Forums]] user, meets Chris in [[McDonald's]] in Charlottesville and provides two snapshots of him as a proof.
*24 September - Chris [[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Yep, the Bitch has not changed a thing...|posts a rant]] against [[Megan Schroeder]] on Facebook, revealing that he uses a Lego minifig of her as some sort of voodoo doll.
*27 September - Chris writes a new [[September 2013 Facebook Posts#Chris-Chan explains it all|Facebook post]] meant to correct what he sees as commonly held misconceptions about his past relationship with Megan.

==October==
[[File:Cwc1013.png|thumb|right|Chris in October 2013]]
*1 October 2013 - [[Barbara]]'s 72nd birthday.
*3 October 2013 - Chris posts [[October 2013 Facebook Posts#Megagi La Skunk agrees that you should have never been born|an angry Facebook rant]] directed at [[Megan]].
*4 October 2013 - Also blames Megan for the trolling and the [[Cwcki]].
*11 October 2013 - Chris posts a Facebook status debunking an impostor's claim that Chris was mugged during a short trip to the Philippines.
*25 October 2013 - Chris films [[CWC Lego Manchester High School Oct 18 2013]].
*28 October 2013 - Chris made a [[October_2013_Facebook_Posts#Another_Announcement|Facebook post]] to leave him alone.
*30 October 2013 - Chris revealed in a Facebook post that he has finally realized, after corresponding with them, that his [[high school]] [[gal-pals]] didn't really like him and were just playing [[Kick the Autistic|Pity the Autistic]].
*31 October 2013 - [[Halloween]]. Chris asks his former gal-pals to come to 14 Branchland Court and apologize.

==November==
*4 November 2013 -Chris posts to [[Facebook]] again asking the world to ignore his porn.
*6 October 2013 - Chris releases [[CWC Lego Manchester High School Oct 18 2013]] to the public.
*15 November 2013 - Release of the life upgrade, upgraded: the [[PS4]].

==December==
*25 December 2013 - [[Christmas]].

== Sources ==
<references/>

{{Timeline}}
[[Category:Chronology]]

CWC Lego Manchester High School Oct 18 2013

2013-11-06T11:36:24Z

Griffintown:

'''CWC Lego Manchester High School Oct 18 2013''' shows us Chris playing with legos again.

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Lego Manchester High School Oct 18 2013
| video = {{#ev:youtube|tEvrhZoASDs}}
| stardate =
| subject =
| style =
| saga =
| shirt =
| other =
| previous = [[You're Always Pretty]]
| next = [[CWC Lego Manchester High School Oct 18 2013|Current]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

TBA

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[You're Always Pretty]]|nextlink=[[CWC Lego Manchester High School Oct 18 2013|Current]]}}

CWC Lego Manchester High School Oct 18 2013

2013-11-06T11:34:45Z

Griffintown: Chris is back with a new Video! :)

'''CWC Lego Manchester High School Oct 18 2013''' shows us Chris playing with legos again.

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC Lego Manchester High School Oct 18 2013
| video = {{#ev:youtube|HAr3GUDH3GM}}
| stardate =
| subject =
| style =
| saga =
| shirt =
| other =
| previous = [[You're Always Pretty]]
| next = [[CWC Lego Manchester High School Oct 18 2013|Current]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

TBA

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[You're Always Pretty]]|nextlink=[[CWC Lego Manchester High School Oct 18 2013|Current]]}}

List of Chris's lies

2013-08-29T01:07:56Z

Griffintown: Typo

{{Protip|STOP PIPING TO "LIE" AS IT IS EXTREMELY OVER-PIPED. Try piping to something more specific and only pipe to "Lie" when nothing else works. The "Fail" article has been deleted as a result of being overpiped, and you certainly don't want this article to be deleted as well.}}

{{quote|I do not lie all the time; I lie some of the time.|[[Chris]], lying during the [[Kacey and Liquid Call]]}}

[[Chris]], not being one to accept personal responsibility, will frequently '''lie''' to save face. This trait was likely inherited from his mother [[Barb]], whose dishonesty [[Cole Smithey E-mails|was described]] by [[Cole Smithey]] as "pathological".

In many cases, he will lie in a meager attempt to be "clever" or "outwit" the [[trolls]]. However, Chris is totally incapable of lying in a way that looks remotely convincing, so his lies have the opposite effect (e.g. [[CWC_Update_26_January_2009|going to Redmond]]). In other cases, he will lie to deny accepting personal responsibility for his actions (e.g. drawing [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|Rule 34]] of [[Megan Schroeder]]).

The reason why Chris is capable of telling bold-faced lies while still claiming to be [[Honest Content|TRUE and HONEST]] probably derives from failing to understand the concept of a "white lie": a lie said out of courtesy to avoid offending people with the uncomfortable truth. Because telling this kind of lie usually is socially acceptable and won't tarnish one's reputation, Chris, in his usual blindness to social rules, probably learned through his [[autistic]] brain that it is okay to lie in order to save face, because it is possible to do so while still remaining [[True and Loyal Fanbase|TRUE and HONEST]].

Complicating this further is the fact that Chris does not attempt to support his claims with any shred of evidence. The end result is a compulsive liar who is about as sly as a two-year-old who has been caught with both hands in the proverbial cookie jar screaming his head off about how he wasn't trying to steal anything whilst bits of cookie fly out of his mouth.

As of recently, Chris has taken to calling his lying "misspeaking". Instead of accepting that someone has busted him on his BS, he prefers to say he "misspoke". Needless to say, no one has fallen for this new ploy.

This list serves to document all of Chris's blatant falsehoods. While Chris is known to speak half-truth, exaggerate, etc., the fact that he is willing to outright tell blatant lies and untruths with no grounds in reality is disturbing and this list serves to document the latter.

==Chris's lies==
* In a [[Mumble]] chat, he lied and said that [[nudes|nude]] photos of him on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] were photoshopped, despite the fact that he consented to these photos.<ref>[[Mumble 2|Mumble Chat #2]], ~44 minute mark</ref> Chris also lied to someone he believed to be [[Shigeru Miyamoto]] about the ED images being photoshopped.<ref name="ReferenceA">[[Miyamoto Saga#From Chris to Miyamoto]]</ref>
* For two days, Chris claimed to have a new [[sweetheart]] named [[Chloe]] after the [[Blanca]] breakup. The first mention was to his fans, of all people.<ref>[[Chris's Sonichu IRC Chloe Introduction]]</ref> Yet, if he were already seeing Chloe, why was he sad about breaking up with Blanca? Chris claimed to have met Chloe IRL at [[GameStop]], where they struck up a conversation, yet Chris has constantly said he freezes even while practicing talking to women.<ref>[[Vivitheg's AIM chat]]</ref> He even said that they had a date together at Taco Bell and shared his first kiss with her. The most damning evidence is Chris never mentioned Chloe again. Furthermore, as of [[Mailbag 13|Mailbag #13]], he says that he has "no recollection of a Chloe."
* Chris [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 26th, 2009|lied]] about taking a trip to Redmond because he had no financial support and to get a "Peaceful Weekend Getaway from the Trolls of the internet."<ref name="ReferenceA"/>
* Chris [[Piedmont_Virginia_Community_College#Kicked_Out_of_College|claimed]] that he was kicked out of class because he was autistic, when the [[Jackie_Chat_5|real reason]] was him being making a homophobic (and racist) comment in front of everyone.
* Chris [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 9th, 2008|claimed]] that [[Blanca]] received the [[medallion]] and sent it back so Chris could modify it, yet the medallion with the "special marks" was destroyed on YouTube. Furthermore, in a private chat with [[Robert Simmons V]]{{cite}}, Chris admits that the medallion was procured and was hastily working on a new one to throw the trolls off guard.
* When a nefarious IRL [[Jerkop]] confronted Chris on his [[Attraction Sign]], Chris quickly hid the sign while the Jerkop left to get the [[Manajerk]]. Then, Chris proceeded to lie and pretend he never brought the sign, resulting in him being banned from the store.
* Chris claimed that he was banned from [[The GAMe PLACe]] forever for going behind the counter. In fact, as revealed by [[Mimms]] on the PVCC forum, the ban for going behind the counter was temporary, and what got him banned forever was the fact that he got into a shouting match with a child and treated the [[Michael Snyder|store's manager]] rudely.
* In an e-mail,<ref>[[Chris E-mails 2008]] - "Against me, [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|that page]] has broken the closest thing I've had to a relationship with Megan Schroeder, who I've finally had at her first time of saying with feeling, 'I Love You' to me, then she found that page and she broke up with me."</ref> Chris claimed Megan said she loved him, when in reality she said no such thing.
* He has made occasional claims<ref>See [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 18th, 2009]] and [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 29th, 2009]].</ref> that he really doesn't hate [[homos]], despite several instances of him showing otherwise.<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate March 10th, 2009]], [[CWC Address to Unilever About AXE]], [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There]], [[It's UGH!]], [[CWC "Boyfriend"]], [[Bless the Fans, Curse the Trolls]]</ref>
* In an [[IRC (20 January 2009)|IRC chat]]<ref>[[IRC (20 January 2009)]] at 21:21</ref> with [[Clyde Cash]] and [[BILLY MAYS]], Chris told Clyde, "People who call others homo are themselves in dire question of their own sexual preferences." When Clyde pointed out that Chris had called Clyde a homo just minutes earlier in the same chat, Chris lied that he didn't. When Chris was shown the exact words he typed, he said it didn't count because he was retaliating against Clyde's remark.
* Impersonated [[CChanSonichuCWC]] and called [[Kacey]], telling her about his sexual fantasies (which involves [[recycling]]).<ref>[[Kacey Phone Call]]</ref>
* Chris's challenges to CChanSonichuCWC began with a [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 29th, 2009|video]] in Spanish, stating that if Liquid Chris could not respond in Spanish, that would prove he is the impostor. When that backfired horribly, Chris then issued the [[SingStar Challenge|''SingStar'' Challenge]] to determine who is the real Chris. When Chris lost the ''SingStar'' Challenge, he declared that the contest meant nothing.
* Chris made a fake page<ref>http://web.archive.org/web/20071108233910/http://members.aol.com/CWCSonichu/EPPromotions283.html</ref> mimicking [[PS3|PlayStation]].com that showed him as the winner of the [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|''PaRappa'' contest]].
* Trying to sound like a tough guy, Chris claimed in a [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 15th, 2009|15 October 2009]] Captain's Log entry that he "did not give a dang" about the reappearance of [[Liquid Chris]], which is obviously not true since Solid devoted the entire first half of the Captain's Log to discrediting Liquid. Solid also stated that it would be the last time he mentioned Liquid, so of course he mentioned him again in [[Brutal Legend Plus|a video six days later]]. In that video, Solid even used one of [[SingStar_Challenge_Round_1#CChanSonichuCWC.27s_Entry|Liquid's ''SingStar'' Challenge songs]] to mock the [[trolls]] (the song's original purpose being to mock Solid), proving that Liquid does indeed still agitate him.
* In [[Mailbag 14|Mailbag #14]], Chris offered a revisionist account of his ejection from [[Grace Baptist Church]], claiming that he was banned from the congregation because his pastor "found images of women in bikinis on my Facebook; he was offended." In fact, as Chris himself revealed in an e-mail to [[Lordsillynipples]] in 2008, he was kicked out after his pastor discovered the catalog of Chris's sexually deviant behavior on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]], as well as the deranged YouTube rant from his [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|25th birthday]].
* In [[Mailbag 25|Mailbag #25]], Chris revealed that he told [[Bob Chandler|his father]] that he had taken the videos of the [[14 Branchland Ct.|Chandler house]] off the Internet. The videos are still available on YouTube.
* Chris began receiving e-mails in [[January 2010]] pointing out to him that his drawings of the Raichu from which Rosechu spawned in [[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]] had a pointed tail instead of a blunted one, meaning the Raichu was male. What makes this incident unique is that Chris could have easily resolved the entire conflict. Since Chris is a longtime fan of the series, he could have easily thought "Wait a sec, when did male and female Pokemon start using different sprites again?", done a few quick searches online, and found that all Raichu were drawn with pointed tails prior to 2006. Eventually, after Chris uploaded an edited page and claimed that the tail had been blunt all along, he had this realization...after someone else showed him Bulbapedia.
* In early [[February 2010]], Chris added a note to the [[CWCipedia]] page for [[Simonla Rosechu]] which claimed that she is a completely original character, and not a sloppy knockoff of [[Evan]] George's [[Simonla_Rosechu|Simonchu]]. This was, of course, an obvious lie, contradicted by Chris's own e-mails and other statements about Simonla's creation. Later, in a [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 4|phone conversation]] with Alec Benson Leary, Chris acted surprised that anyone would be unwilling to accept this "retraction" of the truth, suggesting that he doesn't even comprehend why people might not believe his lies.
* On Chris's [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 5|fifth phone call with Alec]], Chris very quickly found his own logic being used against him. To extricate himself from having to admit he was wrong, Chris instead set the phone down and very unconvincingly pretended to be his own [[Barbara Chandler|mother]], carrying on a small "conversation" with Chris asking him to clean up some [[Chandler cats|cat shit]]. Chris then came back to the phone to tell Alec his mom needed him to take care of the cat and that he had to hang up.
* During the [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 8|eighth conversation with Alec]], Chris claims Nintendo sent him a letter saying Chris had free reign to use Pikachu in his comic, but when Alec asked Chris to upload the letter, Chris said he "misplaced" it. Also, during the call, Chris confidently stated that he "regularly" plays every single one of the games he owns — this being a valid reason he could not sell them for money. Chris owns [[List of Chris's games|roughly 600]] different video games, so unless Chris has figured out [[Time Void|a way to stop time]], it would be impossible for him to play all of those games regularly.
* Chris went to great lengths to tell the fans that he would never show gore and violence in his comics. However, he breaks this statement by killing Evan in a very gory fashion in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]]. He later insists in [[Jackie_Chat_1|his first chat with Jackie]] that it was justified because Alec "gored it up first." Episode #17, which was written long before ''Asperchu'' even began, ended with Rosechu stripping naked, ''clawing a man's head open'', ''electrocuting him'', and ''leaving him in a puddle of his own blood''.
* When the trolls started to demand more comics, Chris stated that he was never sure whether he wanted to make money with ''Sonichu''; if that were true, he would never have tried to make a [[Sonichu Adventure|video game]] about ''[[Sonichu]]'', nor try to sell it to businesspeople.
* Chris has repeatedly referred to [[The Wallflower]] as his "girlfriend", despite making a video [["Damian Antaria", PLEASE, Don't Leave Me - I NEED YOU!!!|pleading for her to be with him]], and, in fact, complaining about her essentially putting him in the [[friend zone]].
* Chris promised to [[03212010 C-Ya Later.MOV|"remove [him]self from the Internet"]], only to [[Cleveland Show Voice Rant|return in less than 48 hours]].
* [[Michael_Snyder_is_ColdHearted_and_Mean|While trying to get himself back into The GAMe PLACe]], Chris told Michael Snyder that he's become a better person. This is after all the things he's done since [[2008#April|April 2008]]. He ends this meeting by calling Michael a Jew, despite stating he had nothing against Jews not five minutes earlier.
* Chris's [[Damien Antaria (CWCipedia page)|CWCipedia article about The Wallflower]] contains some of the biggest flights of fancy, blatant lies, exaggerations, half-truths, and flat-out delusions seen yet from Chris outside of the [[Father Call]]. Specifically, he claimed that he and The Wallflower had shared a kiss; since this would have been Chris's "real" first kiss (aside from "[[Chloe]]", a lie), it was considered important by obsessive CWCki editors to see if he remembers it later (the Wallflower CWCipedia page article was written on April the 19th). Naturally...[[Jackie e-mails Part 2|leaked e-mails from Jackie]] show that by the 10th of April, ''nine days before making this highly suspicious claim'', Chris had either a.) [[Jackie_e-mails_Part_2#Jackie.27s_Questionaire_1|momentarily forgotten that he had been kissed]] — a monumental occasion in his life; b,) lied on his CWCipedia about being kissed; or c.) lied to Jackie about being kissed. In the end, a lie is still a lie, although it's ''possible'' he's basing his story on a gross exaggeration of the truth (the two sharing a drinking straw is the current troll favorite for this).
* In [[Mailbag 49|Mailbag #49]], when asked about his opinion on a possible repeal of the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy that would allow open homosexuals to serve in the U.S. military, Chris said that he thought the policy should only be repealed so that "the [[homos]] can go die in explosions." When called out on this in [[Mailbag 51|several]] [[Mailbag 53|later]] [[Mailbag 54|Mailbags]], Chris forgoes apology to either deny the claim ever took place, or claimed that he had retracted it. Later, he would alter an e-mail in [[Mailbag 51|Mailbag #51]] which contained the quoted remark to make it appear as though Chris was being pro-gay in the original e-mail. Up until the death of the CWCipedia in May 2010, the original, homophobic reply in [[Mailbag 49|Mailbag #49]] remained unchanged and unretracted.
* In the [[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails|e-mails]] with Clyde Cash and [[Surfshack Tito]] about Chris's PS3, Chris swore that he would not reveal the name of his [[Jackie|new girlfriend]]. He broke this promise in [[To Jackie, with Love.MOV|a video]] not two weeks later.
* Also in the [[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails]], Chris said he would not buy another PS3. Not only did he do that and begin earning trophies about two weeks later, he also bought a PS Move controller ([[ECV 00001|seen in this video]]).
* In [[Jackie_E-mails_23|an e-mail exchange with Jackie]], he claims his [[Duck|penis]] is bigger than previously photographed and is no longer bent.
* Chris told [[Vivian Gee]] that he read her book, ''[[A Girl Who Brought Down the World]]'', when, in reality, he gave it to [[Rocky Shoemaker|his pastoral counselor]], and never touched it beyond that.<ref>[[Asperchu is a Horrendous Joke]]</ref>
* In the [[Miyamoto emails]], Chris claims he never sexually harassed [[Megan Schroeder]], despite drawing [[ShecameforCWC.JPG]], and Megan repeatedly having told Chris to stop touching her.<ref>[[Megan_Emails,_2005-2006]]</ref><ref>[[Megan_Emails,_Jan-July_2007]]</ref><ref>[[Megan_Emails,_Aug-Dec_2007]]</ref>
* On the [[Tomboys_and_Tomgirls_of_Virginia]] forum, he said that if homosexuals 'kept it behind closed doors', he wouldn't bother them. Aside from his well-known issues with [[Homos]], his comic states that if he had the power, he'd constantly [[Magi-Chan|be on the lookout for homosexual activity]], and punish them to suit.
* In [[You're Always Pretty]], Chris told his mother he was taking pictures of her, when he was really video taping her.
* Chris claims his [[Duck|penis]] is 6 inches long, the average size of a human male penis. But in [[Chris humps his PS3|one video]], a frustrated Chris blurts out his penis is only 4 inches long.
* When Chris informed his [[mother]] that he [[PS3#Destruction|destroyed his PS3]], he told her that the machine was already malfunctioning before he smashed it to bits. In reality the PS3 was still operational when Chris decided to put it out of use.<ref>[[Jackie E-mails 11]]</ref>
* When he held the [[Alex's Lemonade Stand|lemonade stand]], he claimed that his father died of cancer, when it fact, he died of complications from heart failure. However, this could just be Chris assuming [[Bob]] died of cancer because he had it (at least at one point), and not taking time to look into his actual cause of death.

==Sources==
<references />

[[Category:Lists]]

Talk:You're Always Pretty

2013-07-14T18:35:33Z

Griffintown:

== Transcribing ==

Unless anyone beats me to it, I'll have it done soon. [[User:Cleftpalete|Cleftpalete]] 18:38, 25 February 2012 (PST)

== Date video took place ==

When was this video originally recorded? --[[User:Riley_Martin|Uhh… '''this is Riley Martin.''']] 07:11, 26 February 2012 (PST)
: There's a possibility that they are sitting at a McDonald's. Chris's food bears an uncanny resemblance with a McCafé smoothie and a bag of Apple Dippers. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 11:35, 14 July 2013 (PDT)

===Song Name===

The song's name is "Head over Heels" not "Don't Break My Heart". I changed it. I was a big Tears For Fears fan in the early 90s (I was in grade school). Okay.... fine. It is a guilty pleasure song of mine. [[User:Joepinko|Joepinko]] 07:30, 28 February 2012 (PST)

== Three wise monkeys ==

The first part of Barb's quote: "See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil" is a reference to the [http://www.three-monkeys.info three wise monkeys]. The last bit of the quote most probably is [http://www.three-monkeys.info/1/ORIGIN/FAQENG.htm#A09 "have no fun"] then. --[[User:Galford|Galford]] 19:01, 28 February 2012 (PST)
:*I don't want to start sperging here, just add a plausible context for the conversation between Barb and Chris at this point. It's possible that Barb's quote is a reference to the shirt that Chris got from goodwill. It may have been a shirt [http://funnyshirtz.info/see-hear-speak-no-evil-t-shirt-235269772844291542.html similar to this one]. --[[User:Galford|Galford]] 19:32, 28 February 2012 (PST)

You're Always Pretty

2013-07-14T17:08:52Z

Griffintown: Minor edit, just code no new stuff.

'''You're Always Pretty''' (leaked as '''hyigybybbhgy.flv''') is the first video [[Barbara|Chris's mother]] has ever appeared in. In the video Chris and Barb solemnly make small talk while eating junk food. Chris throws her some strangely inappropriate compliments, and it is implied that they have been fighting and not speaking to each other, although there is no clear reason as to why (though, according to Chris's [[Facebook_statuses|Facebook page]], it may be because he got caught flipping the bird to a [[Jerkop]].) It is the first of its kind, the most candid look at Chris's mother, who has not yet appeared in his [[YouTube]] videos. The video was leaked on 25 [[February 2012]].

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = You're Always Pretty
| video = {{#ev:youtube|aUG3rVfilH4}}
| stardate =
| subject = Food
| style =
| saga = {{Tomgirl}}
| shirt = Not visible
| other = {{Leaked|text}}
| previous = [[Who's Your Brony?]]
| next = [[You're Always Pretty|Current]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
[''Barb and Chris sit at a table eating fast food. Chris has apparently just brought out his camera and set it down. For some reason, Barb is wearing Chris's old pair of [[Pedo-glasses]] with the blue Crayola Model Magic bridge. [[Wikipedia:Tears for Fears|Tears for Fears]]' "[[Wikipedia:Head over Heels (Tears for Fears song)|Head Over Heels]]" plays in the background.'']

'''Chris''': -Oh.

'''Barb''': [''Laughing'']

'''Chris''': Yeah.

'''Barb''': You got your digital camera?

'''Chris''': [[Lie|Yeah. Just a little something there, uh ... ]]

'''Barb''': Who- who're you gonna take pictures of?

'''Chris''': Uuh.. Just you...

'''Barb''': Oh.

'''Chris''': 'Cause I love you.

'''Barb''': Oh, okay. [''Laughing'']

'''Chris''': Yeah... [''Pause''] Yeah... So, you having fun tonight? Aaaare we having fun right now?

'''Barb''': I'm eating.

'''Chris''': Mmm'kay. Y'know, you're very pretty. You're ''always'' pretty!

'''Barb''': Thank you... See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil, have no fun! Hm?

'''Chris''': What?

'''Barb''': [''Chuckles'']

'''Chris''': Yeah. The shirt I picked out from Goodwill the 'udder day. Yeah. [[Chris and Music|I am free as a bird! And this bird you cannot change!]]

'''Barb''': Enjoy your food.

'''Chris''': Yes- [''turns off camera'']

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Who's Your Brony?]]|nextlink=[[You're Always Pretty|Current]]}}

{{Sweetheart Videos}}
[[Category:Leaked videos]]

Who's Your Brony?

2013-07-14T17:06:24Z

Griffintown: Minor edit, just code no new stuff.

{{Honest}}

'''Who's Your Brony?''' is a pair of videos ('''gvfioeqnguvfieqrav (1)''' and '''hcyrejetuikyfdfmynbgr (2)''') made on 12 [[July 2011]] and leaked on 25 [[February 2012]] in which Chris has sex with the [[Jackie]] sex doll while saying "Who's your [[My Little Pony|Brony]]?" The video is similar in concept to [[For Julie's Eyes Only]], but is notably less horrifying because Chris stays clothed. He then proceeds to display his "[[cutie mark]]".

==Videos==
===Sexy time===
{{Infobox/video
| name = Who's Your Brony? 1
| video = {{#ev:youtube|p23-_rWJ2Ag}}
| stardate = 12 [[July 2011]]
| subject = {{Sex|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}} {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}
| other = {{Leaked|text}}
| previous = [[Teenage Dream]]
| next = [[Who%27s_Your_Brony%3F#Tat_Ass|Who's Your Brony? 2]]
}}

==== Transcript ====
Okie-dokie. For you, Jackie-pie, I show you my [[cutie mark]] on my better... mini-skirt.

''[Turns around, although nothing is visible because Chris' fat ass is [[Chris and Camerawork|too close to the camera.]]]''

There's a guitar and a TG for Tom Girl, and a puzzle piece for autism! I has these, I had these put here for weeks! So I pretty much was one step ahead of ya there.

And now, pretend sex.

''[Chris proceeds to hump the blowup doll in what would be considered a "scissoring" position.]''

Yeah. Who's your brony? Who's your brony? Whooo's your brony? Yeah, Jackie! Who's your brony? C'mon, you take it from your. C'mon, Jackie Pie, you take it from your Apple Chris!

All day long, ''(mumbling)''

''[Chris switches to doggy-style position.]''

Who's your brony? Who's your brony? Who's your brony, Jackie-Pie?

Who's your brony? Who's your brony? Who's your brony? I'm your brony, Jackie-Pie! I'll be your brony all day long!

''[Chris switches positions. He is now standing and humping the doll around his waist.]''

Who's your brony? I'm your brony,

Who's your brony? I'm your brony, and you know it

''[Chris switches positions. He is now siting and humping the doll in his lap.]''

Who's your brony, Jackie-Pie? Jackie-Pie, Jackie-Pie. Ah, Jack-Jackie-Pie.

''[Chris fakes an orgasm.]''

Uh, Yeah, Yeah.

'''UUUUGH!''' Delicious!

===Tat Ass===
{{Infobox/video
| name = Who's Your Brony? 2
| video = {{#ev:youtube|N1r6lyA5kaI}}
| stardate = 12 [[July 2011]]
| subject = {{Sex|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}} {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}
| other = {{Leaked|text}}
| previous = [[Who%27s_Your_Brony%3F#Sexy_time|Who's Your Brony? 1]]
| next = [[You're Always Pretty]]
}}

==== Transcript ====
Woopsie-doodles! I forgot to do the other favor.

[''Chris proceeds to shove his ass in the direction of the camera and lift his skirt''.]

Hope that's good enough! Thank you very much, I love you, Jackie pie!

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Teenage Dream]]|nextlink=[[You're Always Pretty]]}}

{{Sweetheart Videos}}

[[Category:Leaked videos]]
[[Category:Jackie Saga videos]]

Teenage Dream

2013-07-14T16:59:47Z

Griffintown: Minor edit, just code no new stuff.

{{Honest}}

'''Teenage Dream''' is an audio file of Chris singing [[Wikipedia:Katy Perry|Katy Perry]]'s song "[[Wikipedia:Teenage Dream (Katy Perry song)|Teenage Dream]]", leaked on 25 [[February 2012]]. In typical Chris style, he sings tunelessly over the original song, rather than finding a karaoke version.

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = Teenage Dream
| video = {{#ev:youtube|vRaX8cMkjjc}}
| stardate =
| subject = {{Music}}
| style =
| saga = {{Jackie}} {{Tomgirl}}
| shirt = Unknown
| other = {{Leaked|text}}
| previous = [[Little Tomboy Blue]]
| next = [[Who's Your Brony?]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
You think I'm pretty 
Without any [[Tomgirl|make-up]] on 
You think I'm [[Random-access humor|funny]] 
When I tell the [[Punchy Sonichu|punch]] line wrong 
I know you get me 
So I'll let my walls come down, down

Before you met me 
[[Lie|I was alright]] 
But things were kinda [[Obesity|heavy]] 
You brought me to life 
Now every February 
[[Valentine's Day Hymn|You'll be my valentine, valentine]]

Let's go [[Chris and Sex|all the way]] tonight 
No regrets, just [[Sweetheart|love]] 
We can dance until we [[Chris and Death|die]] 
You and I 
We'll be young forever

You make me 
Feel like 
I'm living a Teenage Dream 
The way you [[April 16 Fetish Vids|turn me on]] 
[[Biological clock|I can't sleep]] 
Let's [[Sonichu's Edge|run]] [[Ohio Trip|away]] 
And don't ever look back 
Don't ever look back

My [[Heart level|heart]] [[Bob Chandler|stops]] 
When you look at me 
Just one touch 
Now baby I believe 
[[Chris and Reality|This is real]] 
So take a chance 
And don't ever look back 
Don't ever look back

We drove to [[Cole Smithey|Cali]] 
And got drunk on the beach 
Got a motel and 
Built a floor out of sheets 
I finally found you 
My missing [[Autism|puzzle piece]] 
I'm complete

Let's go all the way tonight 
No regrets, just love 
We can dance until we die 
You and I 
We'll be young forever

You make me 
Feel like 
I'm living a Teenage Dream 
The way you turn me on 
[[Biological clock|I can't sleep]] 
Let's run away 
And don't ever look back 
Don't ever-(Video Cuts off)

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Little Tomboy Blue]]|nextlink=[[Who's Your Brony?]]}}

{{Music Videos}}
{{Sweetheart Videos}}

[[Category:Leaked videos]]
[[Category:Jackie Saga videos]]

Little Tomboy Blue

2013-07-14T16:55:33Z

Griffintown: Just adding code, no new material.

{{Honest}}

'''Little Tomboy Blue''' (leaked as '''urqehgvuierg''') is a horrifying video of [[Chris]] stripping for his [[sweetheart]] [[Jackie]] to musical accompaniment, leaked on 25 [[February 2012]].

Chris, in full [[tomgirl]] garb, uses his [[PS3]] to play "[[Wikipedia:Fuck the Pain Away|Fuck the Pain Away]]" by electroclash artist [[Wikipedia:Peaches (musician)|Peaches]] as he poorly imitates traditional stripper mannerisms. Interspersed in the actual song are his made-up lyrics, mostly nonsensical exclamations of his tomgirl pride. As the video progresses, Chris sheds more and more of his clothing, eventually revealing his [[muscle bra]] and panties, with his abdominal flab spilling over the waistline. At points in the video, Chris turns his backside toward the camera and pulls down the panties to jiggle his fat ass. Toward the end, Chris removes his bra and slowly massages his nipples while repeatedly uttering the song's final chorus, thus ensuring that all of our recurring nightmares are replaced by Stripping Chris himself.

It is unknown whether or not Jackie explicitly requested this video, or Chris taped it as a spontaneous "gift". However, unaware that most strippers are not only [[obesity|thin]] but also [[Boyfriend-free girl|women]], Chris's hamfisted attempt at impressing Jackie instead comes across as thoroughly disgusting and creepy. Many [[Relics of Fail]] are visible in this video, including several [[Sonichu]] cutouts, and the original [[Attraction Sign]] from 2003, which, evidently, Chris has found important enough to have kept taped to his wall almost nine years later.

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = Little Tomboy Blue
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Dada-uqoDUY}}
| stardate =
| subject = Strip tease
| style = {{Comedy}}
| saga = {{Jackie}} {{Tomgirl}}
| shirt = Blue/navy tank top
| previous = [[Forgot the Glitter]]
| next = [[Teenage Dream]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
Little Tomboy Blue? Come blow my [[duck|horn]].

''[Chris begins to perform an awkward dance to "Fuck the Pain Away". He reaches over to grab an unidentifiable object, a substitute for a stripper’s pole, and attempts to entice the audience with a more suggestive dance. In usual Chris fashion, he begins to sing.]''
Suckin' on my titties like you wanted me

Calling me, all the time like Blondie

Check out my Chrissy behind

It's fine all of the time

Like sex on the beaches

What else is in the teaches of the [[tomgirl|tomgirls]]! Huh? What?

''[During this time, he begins to raise his shirt up, displaying a taste of the [[Obesity|horrors]] within.]''

''[Forgets the first few words, and stumbles on several lines.]''
... on my titties like you wanted me

Calling me, all the time like Blondie

Check out my Chrissy behind ''[Slaps his rear.]''

It's fine all of the time

What else is in the teaches of Tomgirls?

Like sex on the beaches, huh? What?

''[At this point, he managed to remove his shirt and now he swings it around as though he were arousing his audience.]''

Huh? Right. What? Uhh...

Huh? What? Right. Uhh...

''[He throws the shirt toward the camera, resuming the painfully long striptease. Following this, he lifts up his sports bra to give an eyeful of one manboob to the world. For a moment or two, he fondles it, giving orgasm faces to the camera. Thankfully, Chris puts the bra back on for the time being.]''

Huh? What? Right. Uhh

Huh? What? Right. Uhh

''[He sounds somewhat winded during this bit, and he sets his eyes on a new goal. Rocking his hips, he appears to struggle a tad with his jeans, awkwardly pulling them slightly down before pulling them back up. Eventually, he manages to slip them off and drops them in front of the camera.]''

S.I.S. I.U.D., stay in [[Manchester High School|school]] 'cause it's the best

I.U.D. S.I.S., stay in school 'cause it's the best

I.U.D. S.I.S., stay in school 'cause it's the best

I.U.D. S.I.S., stay in school 'cause it's the best

Sucking' on my titties like you wanted me

Calling me, all the time like Blondie

Check out my Chrissy behind ''[slaps his rear again.]''

It's fine all of the time

Like sex on the beaches

What else is in the teaches of [[tomgirls]]? Huh? What?

''[Horrifically, he begins to thrust his hips more prominently than before. Obviously [[Chris and Health|growing tired]], his hips begin to gyrate, repeatedly flashing the audience his ass. At one point, Chris attempts to lift both legs to waist height. He has to grab them with his arms to accomplish this, and immediately grimaces with the pain of physical effort.]''

[[Fuck Quest|Fuck the pain away]]. Fuck the pain away.

Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.

Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.

Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.

Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.

Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.

Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.

Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.

''[Begins singing the lyrics early.]'' Huh? What? Right. Uhh

Huh? What? Right. Uhh.

Huh? What? Right. Uhh.

''[He is now fondling his manboobs underneath the bra. With his back turned, slowly struggling some, he begins removing his sports bra to display his 42-inch bust to the world.]''

What else in the teaches of tomgirls?

Like sex on the beaches

Huh? What? Right. Uhh.

''[After throwing the [[bra]] toward the camera, he has a delayed reaction with what he was doing, and covers his chest with his arms. Chris then proceeds to squeeze his breasts together for massive cleavage results.]''

Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.

Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.

Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.

Fuck the pain away. Fuck the pain away.

==External Links==
[http://imageshack.us/clip/my-videos/855/qb9n.mp4/ Uncensored version]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Forgot the Glitter]]|nextlink=[[Teenage Dream]]}}

{{Music Videos}}
{{Sweetheart Videos}}
[[Category:Leaked videos]]
[[Category:Jackie Saga videos]]

Forgot the Glitter

2013-07-14T16:52:54Z

Griffintown: Just adding code.

{{Honest}}

'''Forgot the Glitter''' (leaked as ''vjtuevvjkdufkbjtdv [SaveYouTube.com]'') is a video made on 14 [[July 2011]] and leaked on 25 [[February 2012]] in which a distressed Chris performs a jiggle-dance, [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y6WLEi4dQGc inspired by a viral video], in the changing room of a [[Walmart]] for [[Jackie]]. Originally a performance intended to be taped in the store's aisles, Chris had to settle for humiliating himself privately in the fitting rooms due to the fact that the store was busier than he had anticipated.

[[Chris]], dressed in his jean skirt appears trying on a brand new red tank top with a price tag still attached to it. The tank top looks way too small for him, suggesting that even if [[Chris]] were to [[Fashion|buy new clothes]] they would still look as if he had had them since he was twelve years old. After a short disclaimer he starts wobbling his fat rolls back and forth while uttering nonsense for almost two minutes. In the course of the video, he lifts his skirt to reveal the [[tomgirl|Transgender]] symbol inscribed on his left ass cheek, which he calls his "[[cutie mark]]". It appears to be drawn on with Crayola magic marker. This is a rather curious choice of body art given Chris's continual derision of gay men, as the transgender symbol is traditionally associated with the [[Homos|LGBT community]]. After nearly half a minute of mooning his audience [[Chris]] finally pulls his skirt back down to reveal that he has decorated it with the letters "[[Jackie|J.PIE]]", because nothings says "I love you" to a girl quite like spelling her name with silver spangle on your skirt.

Interesting to note is Chris's discomfort in performing such a bizarre request, a reluctance that, while healthy and expected of a [[Autism|sane individual]], has been absent in Chris's [[Love Quest|pursuit]] of appeasing a sweetheart until now. However, the completed video further illustrates that when [[china]] is involved, "dignity" is not a word in Chris's vocabulary.

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = Forgot the Glitter
| video = {{#ev:youtube|wRD1EBmaRx4}}
| stardate = 14 [[July 2011]]
| subject = {{Sex}}
| style = {{Crazy}}
| saga = {{Jackie}} {{Tomgirl}}
| shirt = Red tank top
| other = {{Leaked|text}}
| previous = [[Chris and Jackie's Date]]
| next = [[Little Tomboy Blue]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

''[We see Chris in his tomgirl get up, bent over to talk to the camera in a change room in Wal-Mart.]''

I ain't gonna do it, I'm sorry Jackie, but I'm not gonna be able to do it in the aisles today. More crowded than I thought...

What the Hell is going on with that light?

Anyway, mmmm. Enjoy the two minutes in the dressing room here.

''[Chris begins to shake his body]''

Walla walla Walmart Walla walla Walmart, Walla walla walla walla walla Walmart walla walla

''[Chris lifts up his mini skirt showing his unholy taint. He then begins to shake it in front of the camera.]''

Walla walla Walmart walla walla walla walla Walmart

Deh deh deh deh deh deh walla walla Walmart

walla walla Walmart walla walla Walmart shake that, walla walla Walmart

''[Puts his skirt down and continues dancing.]''

Walla walla walla walla walla, walla walla walla, walla walla Walmart

Walla walla walla walla walla walla walla walla walla walla walla walla walla walla walla

Check your progress, check your progress, walla walla Walmart

''[Chris, now clearly exhausted, attempts to continue dancing but gives up.]''

Oh! the things I do for love, and I forgot the glitter.

([[Stress Sigh|sigh]]) Jackie I'll progress. Check my progress.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Chris and Jackie's Date]]|nextlink=[[Little Tomboy Blue]]}}

{{Sweetheart Videos}}
[[Category:Leaked videos]]
[[Category:Jackie Saga videos]]

Chris and Jackie's Date

2013-07-14T16:45:33Z

Griffintown: Adding code, no new stuff

[[File:Date.jpg|thumb|300px|A view of where Chris and "Jackie" did the do.]]
{{Quote|If it inspires me... if you really try your hardest... I will drive down to see you and pay for the hotel room myself. You won't have to pay a penny because I know you would have taken care of me in DC if you could have. I want to reward you because I know your heart is in the right place. And if you really, really show me how much it is... ;) I'll make sure you know mine is, too.|[[Jackie]] promises Chris [[hanky-panky]] for this video}}
'''Chris and Jackie's Date''' is a four-video series of a date between Chris and [[Jackie]], here represented by a sex doll, leaked on 24 [[February 2012]]. Their romantic date consists of dancing in [[Chris's room]], a trip in [[Son-Chu]] to get some [[McDonald's]], eating it and then making out with the doll in his front yard, and Chris's attempt at re-enacting a viral video in a dressing room at the [[Ruckersville]] [[Mal-Wart|Wal-Mart]].<ref>[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6wRjc2Qg-3Y music video]</ref>

The videos were originally leaked as ''one0612-hioghuyiogyo [SaveYouTube.com], two0612-vgiherqighbvpioerua [SaveYouTube.com], three0612-rqwehgiohcnracga [SaveYouTube.com]'' and ''four0612-hncu9tgohaeruxye [SaveYouTube.com]'', and data suggests that they were recorded on 11 [[July 2011]].

Background was provided when some [[Jackie E-mails 29|Jackie emails]] were leaked:
{{Quote| want you to get all dolled up on the 4th. And I want you to get one of your blow up dolls and dress it up too- but as me. Print out my picture or draw a picture of my face and put it over their's. Put me in gorgeous clothes so I look every part the proud girlfriend of the hottest Tomgirl in all of Virginia. Show me around town, take me to [[McDonalds]] or Starbucks or the movies. Let's have a ball and strut our stuff! Do my make up and pretend I can do your's! Then I want us to end our romantic evening at McIntire Park, watching the fireworks together under the stars. xoxox :D :D|Jackie}}
==Videos==
===One===

{{Infobox/video
| name = Chris and Jackie's Date 1
| video = {{#ev:youtube|7dDfqaMMWxI}}
| stardate = 11 [[July 2011]]
| subject = {{Sex|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}} {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}
| other = {{Leaked|text}}
| previous = [[Cheerleader]]
| next = [[Chris_and_Jackie%27s_Date#Two|Chris and Jackie's Date 2]]
}}

==== Transcript ====

And now, Jackie-pie, I'm gonna go ahead and sweep you off your feet.

''[Turns camera to sex doll]'' Even though right now, you're sitting down.
''[Sets camera up on a table and picks up "Jackie," swinging her around and making his own music of la's and da's, occasionally throwing in random phrases as lyrics.]''

''[He stops dancing and kisses the sex doll's lips (where his [[duck]] has inevitably been) and sets her down. He comes to turn the camera off.]''

===Two===

{{Infobox/video
| name = Chris and Jackie's Date 2
| video = {{#ev:youtube|yKikDhuOE00}}
| stardate = 11 [[July 2011]]
| subject = {{Sex|Dating}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}} {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}
| other = {{Leaked|text}}
| previous = [[Chris_and_Jackie%27s_Date#One|Chris and Jackie's Date 1]]
| next = [[Chris_and_Jackie%27s_Date#Three|Chris and Jackie's Date 3]]
}}

==== Transcript ====

And after having picked you up Jackie and giving you a good dance and song, we are now heading out to the restaurant. We're gonna have some fun, you know, in the car-- and sitting on the car and eating our food. Yep. Yum yum. Very very good. Yum yum.

''[Proceeds to spend the rest of the video [[Random-access humor|making strange "wacka doo" noises]].]''

===Three===

{{Infobox/video
| name = Chris and Jackie's Date 3
| video = {{#ev:youtube|BZCxX-VvEjU}}
| stardate = 11 [[July 2011]]
| subject = {{Sex|Dating & [[sex]]}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}} {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}
| other = {{Leaked|text}}
| previous = [[Chris_and_Jackie%27s_Date#Two|Chris and Jackie's Date 2]]
| next = [[Chris_and_Jackie%27s_Date#Four|Chris and Jackie's Date 4]]
}}

==== Transcript ====

''["Jackie" is sitting on the hood of Chris's car, which is parked on his lawn. Chris comes by and sits down, [[Obesity|making the car shake noticeably]].]''
Okay, so Jackie and I, we're here at the McDonald's parking lot... we are sitting on top our car, after-- and we just enjoyed some apple-dippers and a Happy Meal.

''[Chris grabs the doll by the breast and moves it as a child would when making a toy speak and uses a [[sexism|shrill, high pitched voice]] while he [[Chris and reality|pretends Jackie is talking]].]''

''[As Jackie]'' It was really, really tasty, yes it was. And even better... ''[Unintelligible]''...and I enjoyed it.

''[As himself]'' Yes, it was very enjoyable. Very good... So Jackie-pie, what'cha wanna do now?

''[As Jackie]'' I say we make out. And then see where it goes from there.

''[As himself]'' Alright.

''[Chris then proceeds to give "Jackie" a deep, open-mouthed kiss in the "public parking lot of a McDonald's". He reaches past her and clicks an iPod or a radio. "[[Wikipedia:California Gurls|California Gurls]]" plays. Chris then moves the doll so that he his legs are wrapped around it, its legs around him. He makes out with it for a few seconds before doing a strange, [[gaybian|scissor-like]] sex act. He makes sex noises, switching between his voice and Jackie's. He kisses her again for a moment before returning to his strange humping. He then puts the doll on the hood of his car, turns the music off, and rushes to the camera.]''

God, it's hot out here.

===Four===
{{Honest}}

{{Infobox/video
| name = Chris and Jackie's Date 4
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Y1njcaeYmSs}}
| stardate = 11 [[July 2011]]
| subject = {{Sex|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga = {{Jackie|text}} {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{Green tomgirl|text}}
| other = {{Leaked|text}}
| previous = [[Chris_and_Jackie%27s_Date#Three|Chris and Jackie's Date 3]]
| next = [[Forgot the Glitter]]
}}

==== Transcript ====

Here we go.

[''Immediately starts humping the sex doll while making high-pitched moaning sounds'']

[''after 10 seconds, he turns the sex doll around into the doggy-style position before it goes off-camera, the blow-up doll going head first into his mold-coated bathtub.]

[''Resumes shrill, sexual moans that sound like a whimpering dog while thrusting the doll's behind.'']

[''Continues moaning suggestively'']

Yeah!

[''Moans some more. He pauses to reach over to something (water):'']

Whoopie! [''tosses water into the air as if "Jackie" climaxes & squirts everywhere.'']

[''Sighs of relief, wipes shirt on face from the [[Chris and Health|intensity]] and to remove Jackie-Pie's "cum" before turning the camera off'']

==References==
<references/>

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Cheerleader]]|nextlink=[[Forgot the Glitter]]}}

{{Sweetheart Videos}}
[[Category:Leaked videos]]
[[Category:Jackie Saga videos]]

Cheerleader

2013-07-14T16:37:26Z

Griffintown: Minor edit, just code no new stuff.

'''Cheerleader''' is a video leaked on 25 [[February 2012]] in which Chris acts as a [[Laura Beth Dorazio|cheerleader]] for Jackie (or "Jacjie"), wearing a tank top and [[Tomgirl Saga|denim skirt]].

For reasons unknown, the video is sped up, although this fails to make the process of viewing it any less drawn-out or excruciating.

==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = Cheerleader
| video = {{#ev:youtube|xQzUIZv4Xls}}
| stardate =
| subject =
| style =
| saga = {{Jackie}} {{Tomgirl}}
| shirt = Yellow tank top
| previous = [[Cakefarts]]
| next = [[Chris and Jackie's Date]]
}}

=== Transcript ===
''[The whole video is visibly sped up in editing, although not the audio]''

''[Chris steps out, in tomgirl garb and pom poms. He does some awkward shakes of the pom poms and some knee-kicks.]''
Rah rah ree! [[Kick the Autistic|Kick 'em in the knee!]] Rah rah rut! Kick 'em in the other knee!

''[Chris unsuccessfully tries to spell 'KICK" with his body.]''

[[I_AM_STRONG|Just a little warm up!]]

''[He doesn't even try to get the letters right in his movements anymore as he indulges in a series of kicks.]''

[[Honor_roll|J! A! C! J! I! E!]] Jackie! Who's that girl who can't be beat? [[Jackie|Jackie! Jackie!]] Who's that girl [[Chris and English|who-- she's so sweet!]] Jackie! Jackie!

''[Chris moves toward the camera, his mouth not moving, to reveal that he's either dubbed over his movements or he just can't render a video for shit.]''

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Cakefarts]]|nextlink=[[Chris and Jackie's Date]]}}

{{Sweetheart Videos}}

[[Category:Leaked videos]]
[[Category:Jackie Saga videos]]

Cakefarts

2013-07-14T16:30:43Z

Griffintown: Just adding code, no new material.

{{taxpayermoney}}
{{Honest}}
{{quote|Heeey Jackie-pie! Mmm. You know what I like da most? Cake farts.|Chris.}}
'''Cakefarts''' (leaked as ''fyfdriryjehvsdthyjvdj.mp4 [SaveYouTube.com]'') is a video made on 18 [[July 2011]] and leaked on 25 [[February 2012]] in which Chris sits his naked ass on a [[Chris and money|$9]] [[Obesity|chocolate cake]] for [[Jackie]]'s amusement. While it can not be seen on the censored version, there is already a piece (a little less than a fourth) of the cake taken out, meaning that either Chris (or Barb) had eaten some of this cake before its untimely end. It was inspired by the [http://www.cakefarts.com Cakefarts] shock site.

The "ass dance" is a [[Things Chris has ripped off|reference]] to the [[Adult Swim]] cartoon, ''Shin-Chan'', which involves the titular character [[CWCFlyingElephants|pulling down his pants, showing his ass, and dancing around]].

==Video==

{{Infobox/video
| name = Cakefarts
| video = {{#ev:youtube|9rOdanhY8IY}}
| stardate =
| subject =
| style = {{Crazy}}
| saga = {{Jackie}} {{Tomgirl}}
| shirt = Blue tank top
| previous = [[Christopher Paul Whitney reveal]]
| next = [[Cheerleader]]
}}

{{quote|What the hell am I doing?}}

=== Transcript ===

Heeey Jackie-pie! Mmm. You know what I like da most? Cake farts.

''[Chris proceeds to finger the cake, followed by licking his digit]''

Mmm. Let's get this done.

''Chris has the words [[Random-access humor|"AWESOME SAUCE"]] written in barely legible script on his ass. One of the S's is the wrong way around, and there is scribbled out attempt at writing the word awesome.''

Awesome... Sauce... There it is: Sauce. Ass dance! ass dance! See me do the ass dance. Do wacka do. [[Random-access humor|Shake my funky monkey ass]]give me beans I'll give you gas

''[Chris flails about like a retard in order to make his deformed [[duck|dick]] jiggle]''

Let's do this.

''[Performs the act for which the video is named, in turn getting an erection]''

What the hell am I doing here? ''[Finishes smearing ass with [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|chocolate cake]]]'' What the hell am I doing? I paid nine American dollar for this cake. That's a lotta yen. Kawaii! Bye, Japan.

==External Links==

[http://imageshack.us/clip/my-videos/36/rsv.mp4/ Uncensored version]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Christopher Paul Whitney reveal]]|nextlink=[[Cheerleader]]}}

{{Sweetheart Videos}}

[[Category:Leaked videos]]
[[Category:Jackie Saga videos]]
[[Category:Certain videos of the naughty nature]]

Christopher Paul Whitney reveal

2013-07-14T16:24:14Z

Griffintown:

'''Christopher Paul Whitney reveal''' is a video uploaded by CWCvilleProductions on 30 [[August 2011]], and part of the [[Calling Out]] series. In this video, Chris deflates the big fat balloon of [[Alec Benson Leary]] a day ahead of schedule.

Chris-chan reveals the real face behind [[Asperchu]], then proceeds to spend the remainder of the video mocking Alec by [[Random Access Humor|beatboxing]], [[Chris and health#Nutrition|eating a cheap microwave pizza]], and [[Chris and hypocrisy|calling Alec fat]] whilst assuring everyone he's [[Chris and reality|thin]].

To date, this was the last Youtube video that Chris had personally released, due to the death of [[Bob|his father]] one week later.

{{Infobox/video
| name = Christopher Paul Whitney reveal
| video = {{#ev:youtube|s8wuTuzw-84}}
| stardate = 30 [[August 2011]]
| subject = {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Other|Food}}
| style = {{Smug|text}}, {{Crazy|text}}
| saga = {{Asperchu|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim|text}}
| previous = [[Response to ADF]]
| next = [[Cakefarts]]
}}

{{quote|He's fat! Iiiiii'm thin}}

=== Transcript ===
[[File:ChrisPizza.gif|right|A shining example of Chris's exquisite table manners. Note the way he shoves the food down his mouth with his hands, not even bothering with a fork, knife or plate, and chews with his mouth open.]]

'Tis another fine day - for REVEALING - 'cuz I have not heard 'nything from ''[applies pedo-glasses]'' [[Alec Benson Leary]], also known as Christopher, annnnnd the due date has been reached! It is time for total...rev-yellation! ''[Chris spins the camera to show Alec's profile on the TV]''

Alec Benson Leary. His real name is Christopher Paul "[[Obesity|Fat Man]]" Whit-neeyyy! From Antonio Tetsas- San Antonio, Texas. Age: 36. [[Chris_and_money#But_wait.2C_Chris_isn.27t_employed.21|Unemployed and on welfare!]] His interest include: hot tubbing, [[video games]], retirement, [[Hex Box|Xbox]], folk music, theft and frauuud, milk, comics, and dip. Aannnnd ''[operatic]'' ''eating onliiiiine!''

He's responsible for [[Asperchu]], [[Asperchu#Asperpedia|Asperpedia]], and all mockings and slanders associated, and copyright infringement, upon my own characters of Sonichu and-and Asperchu somewhere else. He also has ties wit da Game Place, do-nay-shins and and what not.

Yeah. He's that famous, hot-tubbin' fat man on youtube, makin' mud...and, guess what, eating online! And recently, he ate a whole block a cheese! ''[operatic]'' ''A whole block of cheeeeeeese~!''

''[MC CWC breaks it down]'' 
Ah-Ah, Ah-Ah, Oh Yeah! 
Ah-Ah, Aussie-Dossie! 
Ah-Ah, Aussie-Dossie! 
Ah-Ah, Aussie-Dossie! 
Oh Yeah, Aussie-Dossie! 
Ah-Ah, Aussie-Dossie! 
Oh, yeah! 

And now for the salt on the wound! [[SpaghettiRoutine|I will be eating online! For the once-time, this time!]] To be enjoyed! Ha-haa! We have here a cheese-stuffed [[Chris_and_health#Nutrition|microwaveable pepperoni pizza!]] And un can of ''teeeea!'' Let the fiest begin!

''[Chris devours the pizza, munching on it for a minute before holding up the remains to the camera, enjoying the hell out of that pizza]'' Cheesy goodness, within the crust! ''[Chris eats the rest, cleans his hands with a paper towel and drinks the tea]'' Mmm, that was ''good!''

''[MC CWC brings the remix]'' 
Oh Yeah, Aussie-Dossie! 
Oh Yeah, Aussie-Dossie! 
Oh Yeah, but a big difference! 
[[Obesity#Denial|He's ''fat!'' Iiiiii'm thin]]! 

And believe it or not, he's even fatter than [[Surfshack Tito (troll)|Surfshack Tito]]! Of which, he has met the deadline, with his apology video, and left the internet for good, so nothing else will be revealed about him! So live in peace, Master Tito! But, Christopher Paul, your big fat balloon has been deflated! ''[Chris mimes a balloon being popped]'' Stay tuned.

==Fatman's Response==

It was later proved that Fatman was not Alec, and that he was telling the truth about his true identity (Christopher Paul Whitney). Much like Chris, Fatman also has an internet cult following, as he has made hundreds of videos in which he eats vast quantities of food on camera, argues with his parents, finds the light of god and in several occasions vomits on himself while taking a bath (seriously, it's fucking nasty).
[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zkKuvAJJ1O8]]
[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0M8vcEWwRUM]]
[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lWrjq_4H7HQ&list=FLtMI8mJx6BB9X9CDJWIjq2w&index=555&feature=plpp_video]]

{{Infobox/video
| name = CWC is a dumb ass
| video = {{#ev:youtube|2WrO0EHh37c}}
| stardate = 14 [[January 2012]]
| saga = {{Asperchu|text}}, {{Tomgirl|text}}
}}

{{quote|Christian Weston Chandler or "CWP" or "C" or whatever his dumbass name is, is a dumbass folks.}}

In addition to "CWC is a dumb ass", Alec also posted a video to Ustream of him eating a stick of butter in which he called out Chris. [http://www.ustream.tv/recorded/19752246]

==Transcript==
Hi folks. Fatman here again, and I just wanna say that Christian Weston Chandler or "CWP" or "C" or whatever his dumbass name is, is a dumbass folks. And he's a dumbass 'cause he thinks I stole some [[Sonichu]] shitty characters or he thinks I'm [[Alec Benson Leary]] but I ain't no Alec Benson Leary, my name's Christopher Paul Whitney folks. And I live in Rutland, Vermont, not San Antonio, Texas. This guy is such a fuckin' dumbass folks, oky-day? And um, and uh he's a dumbass and uh, I did not steal his "Sonichu" and I am not Alec Benson Leary, I am Christopher Paul Whitney. So in conclusion: Christian Weston Chandler is a dumbass. And he should stop being a fucking idiot. Until next time, aussie dossie. Bye now.

==Sources==

<references/>

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Response to ADF]]|nextlink=[[Cakefarts]]}}

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, August 2011| 2011-08-30 r]]
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]
[[Category:Yo! CWC Raps]]

Talk:Inventions

2013-07-13T15:08:50Z

Griffintown: /* Deletion */

==To do==
*edit and enlarge the list of "accomPLISHments of the Renaissance man" in the 1st paragraph;
*add a list of other "inventions" of Chris;
*add a more comprehensive list of "See also" links;
*correct my awful English (sorry, it's not my first language). [[User:GokuGetEm|GokuGetEm]] 11:27, 20 November 2009 (CET)

Initially, I thought that this really doesn't deserve it's own article but I think it can be pulled off and really says something about Chris's narcissism. I really think something could be said that instead of being humble and admitting that he's done stuff but not invent anything, Chris goes to great lengths to say he's "invented" things like a Lego box to hold his cards, on top of Sonichu and shit. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 08:24, 21 November 2009 (CET)

I'm going to say this at the risk of being tarred and feathered, but the Lego box for cards n'such is marginally clever. It's actually a practical solution to a problem (hauling his Pokemon card game shit), using what was available to him. I am not saying that it's an 'invention' by any stretch of the imagination. --[[User:Needlepants|Needlepants]] 00:11, 1 December 2009 (CET)

== Deletion ==

This article really sucks. There isn't enough material out there on inventions relating to Chris. Unless someone has a good reason otherwise, it should be deleted. [[User:Canine|Canine]] 23:09, 9 October 2012 (PDT)

I am 100% in disagreement on that. I loved this page. This needs to be kept, as Chris himself has described these stupid things as literal "inventions", so it's just further proof of his own naivete and ego. --[[User:The World Is Yours|The World Is Yours]] 17:05, 12 July 2013 (PDT)
: I agree. We should keep it. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 08:08, 13 July 2013 (PDT)

File talk:Mcdonalds.jpg

2013-02-05T18:23:03Z

Griffintown:

So, it lives. --[[User:TubularMonkey|TubularMonkey]] 00:14, 30 January 2013 (PST)

Source? --[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 00:39, 30 January 2013 (PST)

The T-shirt is a reference to Erykah Badu, but Chris might have got it second hand [[User:Eamoo|Eamoo]] 07:04, 30 January 2013 (PST)

Do we have any other info, like the location of the said McDonald's? I also noticed a iDevice on the table, possibly a iPhone 5 --[[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 10:23, 5 February 2013 (PST)

For Julie's Eyes Only

2012-02-11T02:15:39Z

Griffintown: This video was made by a fan, not new material.

{{honest}}
<div style="position:fixed; bottom:0; right:0">[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|right|JULAY!]]</div>

 
[[Image:Blowupdoll.gif|center]]

{{protip|"JULLLAAAY" is an ancient meme. Only faggots comment on Chris related videos with any variant of "JULLAAAAAAAY". Even bigger faggots are people who think it's funny to PM and/or e-mail Chris with "JULLLAAAAAAAAAY." The biggest faggots are those who think it's funny to call Chris's house and scream "JULAAAAAAAAAAAAAY".}}

On 20 [[February 2009]], the closest thing [[Christian Weston Chandler]] will ever have to a sex tape was leaked to the Internet. The video file '''For Julies Eyes Only.MP4''' consists of nearly eight minutes of Chris, completely nude except for his socks, making love to [[Kimmi|an inflatable sex doll]]. The sex tape was soon uploaded to SlutLoad where it has received over two million views.

==Summary==
{{quote|JULAAAAAAY!!!! JULAAAAAAY!!!! |Chris while humping Kimmi.}}
{{quote|You take that like a good, bad girl!|Also while humping Kimmi.}}
{{quote|I'm ready to cum!!|Again, while humping Kimmi.}}

'''0:00-0:05''' [''Chris sits cross-legged on his bed, holding Kimmi up as though it were a naked girl standing before him, says "Hey, Julie," and glances at her.'']

'''0:06-0:10''' [''He lies back as he pulls the doll into position over his [[duck]].''] "I love you, Julie..."

'''0:11-0:28''' [''He grips the doll, possibly trying to finger its asshole. He seems confused as to how to effectively copulate with this device.'']

'''0:29-0:44''' [''Our hero abandons all pretense and bends the doll at an unnatural angle (with its upper body pointed straight up and its legs pointed straight out behind it), grapevining its legs with his own and pounding it diligently. Its asshole is spread wide in full view of the camera.'']

'''0:45-0:48''' In a satisfied tone, he sighs "Mmm... Julie..." A moment later, sounding surprised by her passion, he exclaims "''Julieee!''"

'''0:49-1:25''' [''Quiet, uneventful thrusting. Chris seems to have a determined look on his face, as though he is focused on servicing his vinyl lover.'']

'''1:26-1:32''' [''A loud snap can be heard, which seems to catch Chris's attention. He lifts the doll up and examines his crotch, then reaches over to pause the recording. In an email, he tells Julie that his condom had broke so he had to put on another one.']

'''1:33-1:52''' [''Chris resumes filming and humping.'']

'''1:53-2:06''' [''He shifts to a sort of scissor position, with Kimmi "straddling" his right thigh. Chris keeps one hand planted on its "breast".'']

'''2:07-2:08''' "Mmm... Julie! Julieeee!"

'''2:09-2:28''' [''More scissoring.'']

'''2:28-2:31''' "Yesss, Julie... Julie! Mmmm..."

'''2:32-2:49''' [''Chris briefly tries to stick several fingers into Kimmi's ass before rolling over onto his side. His ass is now in full view as it thrusts and quivers against the love doll.'']

'''2:50-2:51''' "You like that, don't you, Julie?"

'''2:52-3:13''' [''More ass-thrusting.'']

'''3:14-3:20''' "Come on, Julie... [unintelligible] take that cock... Mmm, Julie!"

'''3:21-3:39''' [''Chris picks up speed...'']

'''3:40-3:43''' [''Chris puts his right leg over the doll and continues thrusting.'']

'''3:44-3:47''' "Oh, Julie... Julie!"

'''3:47-4:05''' [''More thrusting.'']

'''4:06-4:08''' [''Two loud snaps can be heard as Chris takes his leg off the doll.'']

'''4:25-4:30''' [''Chris now sits on the bed and open his legs, putting the blow-up doll over his body. The scene cuts.'']

'''4:31-4:40''' [''Filming resumes. Chris is seated cross-legged in the bed, much like the first scene. He proceeds to hump the doll.'']

'''4:41-4:50''' [''Chris opens his legs and humps some more.''] "Julie... Yes, Julie... You take that like a good—BAD girl!"

'''5:00-5:21''' [''Chris now is humping the doll quickly. His face is extremely red.'']

'''5:22-5:23''' "Hnmm..."

'''5:24-5:25''' [''Chris cuts the film and resumes the same scene, still humping the doll while seated.'']

'''5:33-5:44''' [''Chris now starts to hump the doll on his knees.'']

'''5:45-5:53''' [''Chris now straddles the doll face-down, thrusting like a rabbit.'']

'''5:54-6:04''' [''Chris holds the doll's boobies and starts to "ride" Kimmi.'']

'''6:05-6:09''' "Oh, Julie... JULIE!! JULIE!!!"

'''6:23-6:40''' "Ju— Yeah... Julie! Julie! Hnmph...hnm... Hnmph...uhh...uhh...uh..."

'''6:47-7:09''' "Hnm, ah, yeah, JULIE! I'm— ah, I'm ready to CUUUM!!! JULIE! JULAY! JULAY! JULIEEE! Julie... HNMPH!" [''More moaning.'']

'''7:10-7:24''' "AAAAUUUUGHHHHAAAHNNN!!!" [''More moaning.'']

'''7:25-7:40''' [''Chris suffocates the doll with his weight by lying over her. He thrusts a couple of times and turns off the camera.''] "Julie, thank you."

==Fan videos==

{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = Chris-Chan wants it
| video = {{#ev:youtube|-0JMSHgx1DU}}
| stardate = 25 [[September 2008]]
| subject = {{Sex|text}}, {{Galpals|text}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| other = {{Leaked|text}}
| type = Remix
}}

==Postcards==
[[Image:Postcard_from_Ebaums.jpg|thumb|Greetings to the Chandler family!]]
Postcards were sent direct to [[Bob Chandler|Chris's father]] by an anonymous troll in early March. His family's reaction is unknown, except that his [[PSEye]] was briefly taken away.

==See also==
* [[For J-R's Eyes Only.MOV]]
* [[Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David]]

==External links==
* [http://megaupload.com/?d=18NA6ERG Download it here!]
* [http://www.slutload.com/watch/w40vYGuWP3X/Chris-Chan-Sextape.html Watch it here!]
* [http://www.efukt.com/2412_Who_The_Fuck_Is_Julie?.html Or watch it here!]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[CWC Update 18 February 2009]]|nextlink=[[CWC Update 4 March 2009]]|}}
{{LeakedVideos}}

[[Category: Chris-chan videos, February 2009| 2009-02-20]]
[[Category: Julie saga videos| 2009-02-20]]
[[Category:Certain videos of the naughty nature| 2009-02-20]]

Facebook

2012-01-26T14:53:17Z

Griffintown:

[[Image:Facebook.jpg|center|300px]]
[[Image:cwc666.PNG|thumb|His friends list has hit the number of [[Clyde Cash|the Beast]].]]
'''Facebook''' is [[Chris]]'s other means of communication aside from [[MySpace]] on his [[Love Quest]]. While often looked over, his correspondence with these [[Trolls|e-women]] reveals that even on the Internet, he manages to convey that he is a fat [[autism|autistic]].

On 31 May 2009, Chris's Facebook was hacked, revealing notes and messages to [[boyfriend-free girls]] in the area in hopes of them becoming his [[sweetheart]]. He failed horribly of course, and [[the Miscreants]] showed us how hard.

Events in 2010 turned Chris firmly against the website. He blamed it in part for his breakup with [[the Wallflower]], and in November had some harsh words and gestures for it while announcing his [[100 2357.MOV|departure from the Internet]].

Sometime in mid 2011, his Facebook account was removed from the site. On 5 [[July 2011]], a new Facebook was discovered with a new picture of Chris. Two days later, his profile was deactivated.

On 02 [[January 2012]], Chris re-open his Facebook account and use it as his personal [[Attraction Sign|attraction sign]].

==Notes From The Man Himself==

===I am a good man===
<blockquote>
Sunday, January 20, 2008 at 5:57pm
 
There are some cyber bullies who have taken my words and feelings out of context, and twisted them into meaningless mockery.
 
Please do not believe those terrible rumors; I am a good man who needs a female sweetheart to soothe my pains from loneliness, stress of social influences, and heart-aches.

Please help me, so I can help you one day.
</blockquote>

===The Common Question, "Do I know you?"===
<blockquote>
Sunday, January 20, 2008 at 9:49pm
 
When a person asks you, "Do I know you?", it brings up a greater answer. "I'm not a mind-reader, so I can't tell you how well you know me."
The question is dumb in itself; no one is able to answer it. Because no one can read their mind and answer it with full confidence.
</blockquote>

===Man I am SOOO SHY. "How Shy are you?" I am SOOO SHY, that...===
<blockquote>
Thursday, January 24, 2008 at 4:48pm
 
Today, Jan. 24, 2008, I was at the Alderman Library. I was playing Sudoku on my PSP, and I was listening in on this conversation between a couple of cute ladies just to my right. I've enjoyed just listening to them talk about their things; I will not devulge any details, because I am the man who will keep a secret (Plus, I don't know ALL the details). Anyway, after one of the two left, the gal that stayed sittin' next to me, talked on her cell in what sounded like Dutch or German. IT WAS THE PERFECT OPENING for a conversation towards making a new gal-pal. I had it in my head, "Pardon me, I couldn't help but overhear your chat on your phone, but was that Dutch or German you were speaking?" I HAD THE NERVE SET UP, I was raring to say it, but when I started to say it, the tension and my shyness and my autism choked me, literally; I couldn't even open my mouth to say anything. And she left. I am kicking myself now.
 
Anyway, THAT IS HOW SHY I AM; I am so shy, that I JUST FREEZE OR CHOKE upon starting to talk to a new girl I don't know yet.
</blockquote>

==Gallery==
<center>
<gallery>
Image:Cwcfacebook1.jpg|Wall
Image:Cwcfacebook2.jpg|Profile, part 1
Image:Cwcfacebook3.jpg|Profile, part 2
Image:Cwcfacebook4.jpg|Profile, part 3
Image:Cwcfacebook5.jpg|
Image:Cwcfacebook6.jpg|
Image:Cwcfacebook7.jpg
Image:Cwcfacebook8.jpg
Image:Cwcfacebook9.jpg
Image:Cwcfacebook10.jpg
Image:Christina1.jpg|17-year-old Christina 1
Image:Christina2.jpg|17-year-old Christina 2
Image:Christina3.jpg|17-year-old Christina 3
Image:Cwcfacebook11.jpg|Chris rejects a single mom. The ironic thing is that this woman was the only one vaguely interested in meeting up with Chris.
Image:Cwcfacebook12.jpg|"Do I know you?" 1
Image:Cwcfacebook13.jpg|"Do I know you?" 2
Image:Cwcfacebook14.jpg
Image:Cwcfacebook15.jpg
Image:Cwcfacebook16.jpg
Image:Cwcfacebook17.jpg
Image:Cwcfacebook18.jpg
Image:Chrisfacebook2011.png| A screencap of Chris's page from [[July 2011]].
File:Chris's Jan 23rd 2012 profile pic.png | Chris's page in [[2012]].
</gallery>
</center>

==See also==
*[[Facebook messages]]
*[[Facebook statuses]]

==External links==
*[http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?imfjwnjrzi0 Notes]
*[http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?20mnnd1juu5 Status]
*<s>[http://www.facebook.com/people/Christian_Weston_Chandler/579729310 His Facebook profile]</s>
*[http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100002534669114 His new Facebook profile]

{{The Internet}}
[[Category:Chris's websites]]

28 October 2011

2012-01-10T13:03:04Z

Griffintown:

{{clear}}
[[File:GuiltyInnocense.jpg|thumb|TRUE and HONEST artist's depiction.]]
On '''28 October 2011''' - a date which will live in infamy - [[The GAMe PLACe]] was suddenly and deliberately attacked by forces of the City of [[CWCville]].

On that fateful Friday evening, around 5:20 p.m.<ref>Based on metadata from Chris's photos</ref>, [[Chris]] and [[Barbara]] visited the GAMe PLACe and had an altercation with its [[manajerks|manager]], [[Michael Snyder]]. Chris took several photos of Michael on that day, and uploaded them to the [[CWCki]] in November. A bit of a delay, but it turns out, he and Barb had been [[jerkop|arrested]] and jailed for various offenses (trespassing, assault, and hit & run). Now both have been charged with a Class 5 Felony, which implies "a '''term of imprisonment of not less than one year''' nor more than 10 years, and ... a fine of not more than $2,500."<ref>http://leg1.state.va.us/000/cod/18.2-10.HTM</ref>

Both Chris and Barb were bonded out on 29 October<ref>https://www.vinelink.com/vinelink/detailsAction.do?siteId=47000&agency=228&id=323013&searchType=offender</ref><ref>https://www.vinelink.com/vinelink/detailsAction.do?siteId=47000&agency=228&id=125674&searchType=offender</ref>, with Chris's initial hearing being a week later than Barb's - possibly owing to the extra charge against him. It may also allow for additional information to be gathered about on his record of dealings with Michael Snyder and the GAMe PLACe, and also to consider any [[autism|medical grounds]] that may affect the outcome of any court proceedings against Chris. The Chandlers will be represented in court by [[Wikipedia:Robert B. Bell|Rob Bell]], a Republican member of the Virginia House of Delegates.

This is the first major event that has come to light since the death of [[Bob Chandler]] on 6 [[September 2011]].

== The charges ==
Below are the charges brought against both Barbara and Chris, along with details and court dates based on the details from the [http://epwsgdp1.courts.state.va.us/gdcourts/captchaVerification.do?landing=landing General District Court Online Case Information System]. At present we do not have a full account of what happened during the incident and under what circumstances the charges were brought against the pair. However, based on at least one previous incident in [[June 2010]], we can assume a rough outline of events.

===Barbara's===
* '''FAIL STOP ACCIDENT > $1000 FEL''' (§ 46.2-894. Duty of driver to stop, etc., in event of accident involving injury or death or damage to attended property; penalty.<ref name="a">http://leg1.state.va.us/cgi-bin/legp504.exe?000+cod+46.2-894</ref>)
** Class 5 Felony charge - Failing to stop after an accident where the damage exceeds $1,000 in value, thought to be vehicular damage on the grounds of The GAMe PLACe parking lot.
* '''ASSLT: ON LAW ENF/DOC PERSON''' (§ 18.2-57. Assault and battery.<ref name="b">http://leg1.state.va.us/cgi-bin/legp504.exe?000+cod+18.2-57</ref>)
** Class 6 Felony charge - Assaulting a law enforcement official. It's likely that this occurred when Barb attempted to prevent the police from arresting Chris.

==== Court dates ====
* 31 October 2011 - Appeared in court to be formally charged.
* 15 December 2011 - 1:00pm - Judge Robert Downer Jr. granted a continuance for both Chris and Barb's charges.
* 5 January 2012 - 1:00pm - Yet another continuance.
* 5 April 2012 - 1:00pm - Another hearing

===Chris's===
* '''FAIL STOP ACCIDENT > $1000 FEL''' (§ 46.2-894. Duty of driver to stop, etc., in event of accident involving injury or death or damage to attended property; penalty.<ref name="a" />)
** Class 5 Felony charge - Failing to stop after an accident where the damage exceeds $1,000 in value, thought to be vehicular damage on the grounds of The GAMe PLACe parking lot.
* '''ASSAULT: (MISDEMEANOR)''' (§ 18.2-57. Assault and battery.<ref name="b" />)
** Class 1 Misdemeanor charge - Attempted or actual assault against another person, perhaps [[Michael Snyder|Snyder]].
* '''TRESPASS AFTER FORBIDDEN''' (§ 18.2-119. Trespass after having been forbidden to do so; penalties.<ref>http://leg1.state.va.us/cgi-bin/legp504.exe?000+cod+18.2-119</ref>)
** Class 1 Misdemeanor charge - Trespassing on land or within an area from which the offender is forbidden, no doubt due to setting foot in The GAMe PLACe.

==== Court dates ====
* 7 November 2011 - Appeared in court to be formally charged.
* 15 December 2011 - 1:00pm - Judge Robert Downer Jr. granted a continuance (postponement) for both Chris and Barb's charges.
* 5 January 2012 - 1:00pm - Yet another continuance.
* 5 April 2012 - 1:00pm - Another hearing
== Civil suit ==
Michael Snyder also filled a civil suit against both Chris and Barb on 1 November 2011, 4 days after the incident.
The reason for the lawsuit and what damages are being sought is currently unknown besides that it is related to the 28 October event. Barb attended a second hearing on 14 November, a third took place on 15 December, at the same time as her criminal case hearing. Barb must attend a fourth hearing on 5 January at 1:00 PM.

Chris' case at one point read 'Other Judgement', however, it appears to have been open again. Chris is due to appear in court on 5 January at 2:15 PM, shortly after his criminal hearing.

Before the court hearing, Michael Snyder requested and received a Preliminary Protective Order against both Chris and Barbara. This order is similar to a restraining order, and prohibits Chris or Barb from contacting Michael or engaging in any threatening behavior towards him before the hearing. The order lasts for 15 days.<ref>http://www.dcjs.virginia.gov/victims/documents/podomesticviolence.pdf</ref>

== Aftermath ==
[[File:Card.PNG|thumb|Chris's only chance.]]

* On 4 November, soon after being bailed out of jail, Chris uploaded the pictures he took of Michael Snyder on the 28th to the CWCki, plastering them on the front page as well as Michael's own article, with Chris presumably doing it as a response to the events at The GAMe PLACe.<ref>[[Special:Contributions/Christianchandler]]</ref> In the respective image descriptions, Chris claimed that Snyder molests children and taunted him for his [[obesity]].
{{-}}
== Photos ==
<gallery>
File:HNI 0020.JPG|Chris's photo of The GAMe PLACe; note that everyone is looking at the camera
File:HNI 0021.JPG|Chris's photograph of Michael Snyder
File:HNI 0022.JPG|Chris's second photograph of Michael Snyder
File:28 Oct 2011 Barb1.png|Barb's failure to stop felony charge
File:28 Oct 2011 Barb2.png|Barb's felony assault on a police officer charge
File:28 Oct 2011 Chris1.png|Chris's failure to stop felony charge
File:28 Oct 2011 Chris2.png|Chris's misdemeanor assault charge
File:28 Oct 2011 Chris3.png|Chris's trespass misdemeanor charge
File:Chriscivil29.png|Michael Snyder's civil suit against Chris
File:Barbcivil29.png|Michael Snyder's civil suit against Barbara
</gallery>

==Fan Art ==
<gallery>
File:Chris mug.jpg|Artist's depiction of Chris's mugshot.
File:Chris joker.jpg| Why so serious?
File:TheJoker.png|Oh dear...
File:Chris court sketch.png| An artist provides a theoretical court sketch.
File:Guilty.png|A theoretical reaction to the judgment.
File:RAPSHT-P1.jpg| An artist compiled Chris's crimes onto a rap sheet. (Page 1/2)
File:RAPSHT-P2.jpg| An artist compiled Chris's crimes onto a rap sheet. (Page 2/2)
</gallery>

==References==
<references />

== See also ==
*[[6 June 2010]]
*[[Chris and the Law]]

[[Category:Events]]
[[Category:The GAMe PLACe]]

Joseph Herring

2012-01-07T02:24:25Z

Griffintown:

[[Image:0245-JosephWHerring98.jpg|thumb|left|Joe in real life...]]
[[Image:JoeHerring.jpg|right|thumb|right|120px|...and as Chris depicted him.]]

'''Joseph Herring''' (born December 14, 1979) was one of Chris's few male "buddies". They were water boys for the varsity basketball team at [[Manchester High School]]. Two years older, Joseph told Chris about his girlfriend. Chris consoled him when he got dumped.<ref>[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile#The Teenage Years]]</ref> According to Chris, she gave him a "bum steer".<ref>[[:Image:0232-CWCNote3.jpg|DVD 99]]</ref>

Chris once rode in Joseph's jeep when the buses failed to turn up for one game.<ref>[[:Image:0232-CWCNote3.jpg|DVD 99]]</ref>

Joseph (later [[Retroactive continuity in Sonichu|retconned]] as '''Joe Herr''') appears in [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu #7'']] only, during a time travel storyline. Like many teens, he is depicted in the comic with a bad case of acne. It was presumed that [[Manchester High School|Manchester High]] employs the use of the [[Slow-in-the-minds|mentally handicapped]] and horribly disfigured students to clean jock straps and refill water bottles. A pimply character similar to Joe appears in [[Sonichu 5|''Sonichu'' #5]] with a girlfriend, both of whom are split apart due to [[Mary Lee Walsh]]'s quest to [[Virginia is for Virgins|make true love illegal in Virginia]]. It is unknown if this throwaway character is intended to be Joe. The reasons given in the comic for his breakup with his girlfriend involve an incident in a restaurant involving "spilled soup" and "tossed salad."

When high res images from the [[DVD]] slideshow were released, it was discovered that Joseph was a fairly good-looking young man that Chris drew horribly disfigured [[Chris and his Ego|to make himself look good]] in comparison.
{{-}}

==References==
<references/>

{{Not_Jerks}}
{{People}}

{{DEFAULTSORT:Herring, Joseph}}
[[Category:People]]
[[Category:Real people who have appeared in Sonichu comics]]

Trolls

2011-12-29T18:18:44Z

Griffintown: Reverted edits by BeaverBeaver (talk) to last revision by Granola

{{quote|they are vicious, crazy, wickedly smart people.|[[Chris]] on trolls<ref>[[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia]]</ref>}}
{{quote|What a world we live in, with such trolls in it.|[[Blake]], in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].}}[[Image:REALChrisChanAndFriends.jpg|center]]
[[Image:Faceless Trolls.png|thumb|120px|The Furies]]
[[Image:Ff7troll.png|thumb|300px|Now for the [[Hex Box]].]]

'''Trolls''' (numbered about seven billion strong) are the various individuals of all races, colors, and creeds united under a common goal - to ruin the [[Internet]]'s most beloved and most hated [[autistic]] manchild, [[Christian Weston Chandler]].

Trolling schemes by these individuals have ranged from hacking CWC's websites to making him take [[Nudes|nude pics]] and more.

==Pre-ED==
It is notable that Chris was bullied IRL before his discovery by [[4-cent garbage.com|4chan]] and [[ED]]. It can be argued that the first known torment of Chris occurred when his life-long-friend-who-no-longer-speaks-to-him, [[Sarah Hammer]], [[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares#Memories of childhood|locked him under the house]] and tried to feed him a poisonous [[Wikipedia:Honeysuckle|Honeysuckle]] when they were children. The next notable bullying occurred during the infamous mini-date with [[Hanna]] in [[2005]] which smashed his [[heart level]] to 15%. Around the same time, he was also trolled by a girl he contacted through [[MySpace]] named [[MySpace messages#Lindsay|Lindsay Kaye]]. There was also possible trolling of Chris through the guestbook on his website from as early as [[2003]], when "a hot redhead" said that she would meet him outside of [[PVCC]] (either this was epic trolling, or Chris put it on the guestbook himself). And let's not forget about [[Mary Lee Walsh]] and [[The GAMe PLACe]] hijinks.

But this was all child's play compared to what happened next....

== The Few, the Proud, the Elite ==

===Asperpedia Four===
Includes Alec Benson Leary (the creator of ''[[Asperchu]]''), [[Evan]] (the creator of ''Simonchu'', and therefore [[Simonla]]), Sean August Watley (the creator of ''Moon-Pals''), and Mao (the creator of the Asperpedia, which brought them all together).

[[Image:SirWilliamMaysOBE.jpg|left|80px|thumb|BILLY]]

=== [[BILLY MAYS]] ===
The individual who trolls as the loud-mouthed salesman of the same name, who types in ALL CAPS, and was declared the mayor of [[CWCville]] by Chris on 3 March 2009 while under pressure from [[BlueSpike#Max|Max]]. It is widely suspected that Chris himself had something to do with his untimely [[Chris and death|death]].

=== [[Blanca Weiss]] ===
[[Image:Blanka.jpg|80px|thumb|Blanca's true identity.]]

"Blanca" was really a trio of trolls (RickyRicardo123, Ickeriss69, and Nurse Icky-chan) who tricked Chris into sending them nudes, and later his [[Medallions of Fail|Sonichu medallion]]. Ickeriss later uploaded a couple of [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ofqcc7VOn1k videos] featuring the Sonichu medallion, including a video in which the medallion is destroyed.

Not to be confused with [[Trolls#Lordsillynipples|LordSillyNipples]], who used the Blanca identity to score the first nudes.

=== [[BlueSpike]] ===
BlueSpike (AKA "LeonSpike", aka "Julie", aka "Max") is a thirteen-year-old boy who pretended to be Chris's [[sweetheart]] "Julie". He later revealed himself as a troll in a now infamous [[Julie Reveals Herself|hour-long audio recording]] in which he berates Christian and makes him stick his Sonichu medallion in his ass.

[[Image:BryanBash.jpg|thumb|left|80px|Bryan Bash (right) with your sister (left).]]

=== Bryan Bash ===
Bryan Bash is a close friend of [[Clyde Cash]]. He is the one who [[Hooker incident|sent hookers over to Chris's house]], as well as the person who called during the infamous [[Bob Walks In|"Bob Walks In"]] audio file, and is responsible for leaking [[CWCRockin4Way.jpg|an image]] of Chris having sex with the members of his ''[[Guitar Hero]]'' band (including a [[niggo]]). Additionally, he leaked the [[Father Call]] and the [[Kacey and Liquid Call]] to [[/cwc/]] on 11 November, [[2009]], and he has also leaked conversations between [[Chris]] and [[Jack Thaddeus]].

=== [[Clyde Cash]] ===

[[image:TheRealClydeCash.jpg|thumb|80px|right|Clyde Cash.The man.The legend.The guido]]

The nefarious [[Clyde Cash]] is the most infamous and legendary of bullies. A vile and reprehensible fellow whose very name strikes fear and revulsion into Chris's clogged heart and inspires admiration from the souls of bullies. He posed as [[Shigeru Miyamoto]], raped Chris's beloved [[PandaHalo]], and performed many more amazing feats about which songs shall be written and the minstrels shall sing of in the ages immemorial. Unfortunately it will not come to pass since Clyde is serving a life sentence for stealing the identity of Lee Hotti.

=== [[Emily]] ===
A brave soul who went on a date with Chris. She was later saved by the [[Man in the Pickle Suit|Jew in the Pickle Suit]].

[[File:Ahuvia.png|thumb|left|80px|Jack Thaddeus]]

=== [[Jack Thaddeus]] ===
The possible successor (and gay lover) of Clyde Cash and is responsible for various [[PS3#PlayStation Network|PSN]]-related trollings and also for the [[CWCipedia]] ads.

[[File:Jimmuh hill.jpg|thumb|80px|Jimmy Hill]]

=== [[Jimmy Hill]] ===
Jimmy Hill (full name James William Thomas Hill, OBE) is the true original creator of Sonichu, the first openly gay cartoon character that became very popular in Europe back in 2009. He has since retired as a billionaire.

=== [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] ===
The original creator of the [[ED]] page.

=== [[Man in the Pickle Suit|The Jew in the Pickle Suit]] ===
An IRL pickleman who answers to Clyde Cash. He saved Emily from the clutches of Chris.

[[Image:CChanSonichuCWC.jpg|thumb|left|80px|The REAL Chris]]

=== [[Liquid Chris]] ===
A [[YouTube]] troll who is known for doing a spot-on impersonation of Chris-chan. Within his saga, Liquid Chris is referred to as the [[TRUE and HONEST]] Chris-chan and creator of the popular comic character Sonichu, and Solid is referred to as an angry troll named [[Ian Brandon Anderson]], who made outlandish claims that he was the real Chris.

=== Lordsillynipples ===
A troll from [[ED]] who was responsible for impersonating [[Blanca]] and being the first to obtain the now [[Pickles|infamous Chris-chan Noodz]] on 11 September 2008, along with [[Chris's DVD]]. She is also responsible for creating the [[Man in the Pickle Suit]] and for feeding Chris the infamous guido picture of [[Clyde]].

=== [[Robert Simmons V]] ===
A YouTube troll who managed to gain Chris's trust by showing him support and mirroring his life. Along with [[Church audio|visiting Chris's church]] and meeting [[Bob Chandler|Bob]], he also had a hand in organizing the [[Emily Date Conversation Transcript|Emily date]].

=== [[Shigeru Miyamoto]] ===
Shigeru Miyamoto (Japanese: 宮本茂) is the creator of some of Nintendo's most legendary video game franchises such as Mario, Zelda, and Star Fox. Who in 2009 took time out of his busy schedule to troll chris by pretending to be interested in his [[sonichu|yellow sonic abortion]].

=== [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] ===

While there's no definitive proof of these two being trolls, they have been known to dispense advice for Chris from time to time, especially on the subject of relationships.<ref name="Jackie e 16">[[Jackie_E-mails_16]]</ref> Considering the [["Damian Antaria", PLEASE, Don't Leave Me - I NEED YOU!!!|results derived from said advice]], one cannot help but wonder about their [[Laughs Under Lucricities|true motivations]].

[[image:Tito 300.gif|thumb|80px|Surfshack Tito]]

=== [[Surfshack Tito (troll)|Surfshack Tito]] ===

An enigmatic troll who managed to invoke Chris's wrath on [[Surfshack Tito|two]] [[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!|separate]] occasions by hacking his PSN and taking the blame for ruining Chris's slim chances with [[The Wallflower]]. Recently, he has been involved in the destruction of Chris's beloved [[PS3]].

[[image:TH.PNG|thumb|80px|left|Thorg]]

=== [[Thorg]] ===
A troll responsible for creating a [[20 December 2009|slanderous billboard]] in 2009 and exposing [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia]] in 2011. A major part of Chris's 2011 [[Calling Out|blackmail campaign]].

[[image:Vivian.jpg|thumb|80px|Vivian]]

===[[Vivian Gee]]===
The creator of the ''Sonichu'' [[audiobooks]] and various other Chris-related videos and cousin of Clyde Cash. A former white knight who turned troll after she realized Chris was a [[Vivian Gee E-mails|hopeless, thick-skulled moron]].
{{clear}}

==Devil Trolls==
[[Image:DevilTroll.jpg|thumb|left|Artist's depiction.]]
[[File:ModNation TrollFemale.jpg|thumb|Featured in ''[[ModNation Racers]]''.]]

Aside from the several notable figures above, the '''Devil Trolls''' are mysterious, evil creatures that appear in Chris's ''[[Sonichu]]'' comic series. These creatures are first mentioned in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]] and make their first full appearance in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]].

Like many beings within Chris's comics, the Devil Trolls are inspired by his encounters in real life. Devil Trolls represent the various trolls that have given him such [[stress]] over his lifetime. This is shown when Chris encounters a set of them attacking a room containing his stuff from one of his earlier websites.

The Devil Trolls make their first mentioned appearance as some sort of grass protrusions taking away the fallen "[[IBAChandler]]" after Sonichu defeats him in ''Sonichu'' #9. They make their full appearance in ''Sonichu'' #10, as [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]] encounters them inside a room containing his pictures from his various websites. Seeing as Chris can't create anything without ripping off original designs, Devil Trolls resemble [[Wikipedia:Troll doll|those old Troll toys]], minus their gems, with long tails and demon-like wings. They also sport sharp teeth.
{{clear}}

== Motivations ==
[[File:Trollll.PNG|thumb|Drawing of a troll appearing in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]].]]

===Chris's perspective===
Chris himself has a more simplistic view of what motivates his enemies. When a [[Mailbag]] correspondent asked him to explain why he's trolled, and why so many people seem to hate him, Chris had this ingenious response:

{{quote|"Tehy're just jealous that they did not think of [[Sonichu]] first, or that I am more [[Chris and art|Artistically Talented]] than they are."|[[Chris]], [[Mailbag 5|Mailbag #5]]}}

This is consistent with the advice given many children who are IRL trolled in school: that bullies are merely jealous of you, and want to see you react unfavorably. Since Chris [[Count Graduon|never moved past]] [[Manchester High School|high school]] mentally, he still believes he is hated because he is so much better than everyone else.

From his own attempts to illustrate trolling, it's obvious that Chris has no concept of how it works. When he tried his hand at impersonation, he thought that we'd all be trolled if he pretended to be an epic troll, but then [[Jack|a troll]] saw through his lie and forced him to admit that he is, indeed, a fat idiot. Chris believes that trolling has two steps: pretend to be someone you're not and then "troll" someone by revealing who you really are. [[Silvana]], a character based on his perception of forum trolls who claim to be people they aren't, thinks it's hilarious to pretend to be [[Meg Griffin]], kiss Chris, and then transform once she's out of sight. As a result, Chris walks away happy, unaware that he just kissed a tranny, defeating the entire point of "trolling" him.

Recently, it seems that he's decided that the majority of his hated trolls are actually homosexuals, combining his two major hates into one massive force of nature. The earliest this is seen is [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Mailbag&oldid=3208|a message he wrote] in his Mailbag section, exploding in rage over an added [[Twitter]] and how they could talk about him behind his back. Even more, in his [[Damien Antaria (CWCipedia Page)|CWCipedia article on The Wallflower]], Chris has also decided that the trolls are also [[niggos|black]].

Unsurprisingly, Chris also considers trolling a ''crime'', and has somehow dedicated himself to stop trolling. However, Chris's views on trolling are very very skewed, as he believes that ''all'' trolling is equal to what he had done to him. A [[EXCLUSIVE Manchester High School 2000 Reunion Required NOW|recent video]] actually has him tell people how to act on the Internet [[Chris and hypocrisy|mere moments after revealing his real name, address, and phone number]].

===His parents' perspective===
The [[Matthew Noble call]] in August 2010 revealed some interesting insights into Bob and Barbara Chandler's interpretation of what has happened to their son over the years. Chris's parents are apparently convinced that the entire Chris-chan Trolldom grew out of a conspiracy by Michael Snyder, two alleged homosexuals who frequented The GAMe PLACe (possibly [[Lucas]] and [[Mimms]]), and ''[[Megan Schroeder]]'', who worked to get Chris banned from the store and are involved with a general effort to harass and torment Chris. When speaking with Ivy, Bob described Megan with words like "cruel" and "German". Bob was convinced that it is all because they are persecuting Chris for being autistic, while in reality he was scaring away customers with his behavior and sexually harassing Megan.

It's useful to try to consider things from his parents' point of view. To begin with, there ''is'' a worldwide conspiracy, more or less, to pester the Chandlers, violate their privacy, drive their son to do ridiculous things, and otherwise fuck with them in myriad ways. Bob and Barbara are bombarded by prank phone calls all day, nude photos, God knows what else arrive in their mail, signs mysteriously appearing on their lawn, Chris having [[Kacey and Liquid Call|angry screaming matches]] with people they've never met on the telephone, Chris once drove off to Ohio to meet [[Julie|a woman who didn't exist]], and so on.

Being Chris's parents must be a fairly surreal experience at this point, and given that they belong to a much older generation, they can hardly be expected to develop the grasp of Internet social phenomena that they'd need to properly understand their situation. The GAMe PLACe, however small a piece of the bigger picture it may be, is the most significant real, physical element of Chris's adventures in trolldom that they've been exposed to. As ridiculous as their theory may seem, it's probably the best they can do as far as making sense of what has happened and continues to happen to them.

==See also==
* [[4-cent garbage.com]]
* [[CWCki]]
* [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]
* [[PVCC (Message Board)|PVCC]]
* [[Rollin' and Trollin']]
* [[White knight]]

==References==
<references/>

{{Trolls}}
{{People}}

[[Category:Trolls]]
[[Category:Lists]]

File:CWCki Banner Introduction.jpg

2011-12-23T17:22:43Z

Griffintown: uploaded a new version of "File:CWCiki Introduction.jpg": removing vandalism

CWCiki Introduction for main page ^_^

File:CWCki Banner Introduction.jpg

2011-12-21T16:45:13Z

Griffintown: uploaded a new version of "File:CWCiki Introduction.jpg": Reverted to version as of 05:32, 10 August 2011

CWCiki Introduction for main page ^_^

Trolls

2011-12-19T01:06:48Z

Griffintown: Reverted edits by TotalUtterLegend (talk) to last revision by NegaCWC

Rocky Shoemaker call

2011-12-12T05:49:17Z

Griffintown: No. No other trolls asked this before, I don't see why we should start now.

On December 8, 2011, a [[troll]] called [[Rocky Shoemaker]] and pretended to be a court-appointed psychiatrist name "Dr. Perron." In the process, "Perron" managed to get a variety of details about the Chandlers' living conditions from her.

It is revealed that there is a severe bug infestation at [[14 Branchland Court|Chris's home]], which might explain why he was "[[Voicemail greeting#6 December 2011|sick]]". The call also reveals that [[Bob]] was originally hospitalized and quarantined for "bug bites" before he died. Doctor Perron advises Ms. Shoemaker to convince Barb and Chris to move out of the property whilst the trial goes on and that perhaps Ms. Shoemaker could find them a temporary home within the church outreach program whilst Doctor Perron arranges a fumigation of the property.

== Transcript ==

(Phone ringing)

Shoemaker: Hello?

Doctor Perron: Good afternoon, uh, is this, uh, Ms. Shoemaker?

Shoemaker: I...I beg your pardon?

Doctor Perron: Uh, is this, uh, Ms. or Mrs., uh, Shoemaker?

Shoemaker: Yes.

Doctor Perron: Uh, thank you. Um, yes, uh, I, my name is, uh, Dr. Perron. I was appointed by the court to, uh, give an assessment of Chris' mental health. Have you been aware of all...any of this?

Shoemaker: Uh, no, I don't have any authorization to talk to anybody about this.

Doctor Perron: Oh, well, he suggested that we give you a call. You've been his pastoral counselor for some time.

Shoemaker: Yeah, but I would have to see something in writing, uh, simply because I have been getting a lot of [[Prank calls|unauthorized phone calls]].

Doctor Perron: From the court, or from this office?

Shoemaker: From, from, from...people claiming to be part of all this.

Doctor Perron: Well, um...sorry...did you say, did you say that...

Shoemaker: So...

Doctor Perron: ...did you say that you have recieved a call from this number before? Because, I did ask my secretary to try and reach you if she could. But that may have been her.

Shoemaker: I, I, I don't, I, I, I...your number is listed as unknown, so I have no idea what your number is.

Doctor Perron: Oh, well, I'm calling from virginia. Um, oh...*sigh*...well, uh, I suppose if there are security purposes...

Shoemaker: If you could...if you could fax an authorization, I'd be very happy to talk with you.

Doctor Perron: Certainly, do you have a fax number?

Shoemaker: Or if you could, or if you could, or if you could go through, uh, the lawyer, Robert Bell, uh, he would certainly authorize it.

Doctor Perron: Well, I've already spoken to Mr. Bell, and he's, uh, he gave me a list of numbers, of people that Christian recommended that we should get in touch with to, uh, come through some kind of assessment process, and uh, you're on top of the list.

Shoemaker: Okay...

Doctor Perron: Have you spoken with...

Shoemaker: That, that, that would be, that would be fine...I, I would just either have to have something in writing or I'd have to hear something from Mr. Bell himself. And that's just to protect Christian, um, because I've had police reports filed over the past two years around all of this, because of misuse of my phone.

Doctor Perron: Well, uh, yes, I was...I was made aware of everything that had been happening. Uh...

Shoemaker: Yeah.

Doctor Perron: What if this was previous to the, uh, to the current case?

Shoemaker: Yeah, yeah. I could understand that.

Doctor Perron: Yes.

Shoemaker: Uh...

Doctor Perron: This is what we were trying to do. We were attempting to get a kind of, uh, historical perspective on everything that had been going on. But, um, It's been very difficult, uh...

Shoemaker: Right. That makes perfect sense and I would be very happy to help with it. But, I, I do need to have some authorization.

Doctor Perron: Well, uh, I shall be meeting with Christian in uh, in, uh, Branchland Court uh, on the...hold on a second...either the tenth or the eleventh...hold on...

Shoemaker: Mm-hmm.

Doctor Perron: Oh, yes, it would be the tenth. Uh, yeah, so we should be up there on the tenth. Uh, eleven o'clock in the morning? Uh, we just wanted to meet with Christian...

Shoemaker: Uh-huh.

Doctor Perron: ...um, I suppose, if you wanted to, uh, to have some kind of introduction, face to face, I assume Mr. Bell will be there as well, I suppose if you want to come along to that.

Shoemaker: That, that, that would be fine. This is on the tenth, that is...

Doctor Perron: On Saturday.

Shoemaker: What day of the week is...pardon?

Doctor Perron: That would be on Saturday.

Shoemaker: Uh, day after tomorrow.

Doctor Perron: Yes.

Shoemaker: At what time?

Doctor Perron: Uh, is it, uh, ten or...hold on a second...yes, it was eleven o'clock. In the morning.

Shoemaker: Eleven o'clock?

Doctor Perron: Yes.

Shoemaker: Uh-huh. I...

Doctor Perron: I assume...

Shoemaker: I...I could do that at eleven.

Doctor Perron: All right, I assume you know the way down there. *chuckle*

Shoemaker: Uh, this is...would be in Mr. Bell's office?

Doctor Perron: No, this would be in, uh...Christian's home, uh...

Shoemaker: Where?

Doctor Perron: ...Christian's home, on uh, 14 Branchland Court. He, uh, well I don't know, he, uh, requested that we, uh, liaise there and, uh, Mr. Bell seems to have gone along with it. It's, uh, a little unorthodox, but uh, we wouldn't mind seeing him inside his, uh...inside his home. To get a kind of sense of everything that had been going on...from him and his mother as well.

Shoemaker: Where...okay, uh...let me write down the, the address again.

Doctor Perron: It's, uh, 14 Branchland Court. It's, uh, Christian's home address.

Shoemaker: Oh! He is meeting you at his home?

Doctor Perron: Yes.

Shoemaker: Um...hm!

Doctor Perron: Like I said, it was a little unorthodox...

Shoemaker: That, that...it, it...it not only would be unorthodox but I think you'll have a very difficult time work...getting anything done in that home...

Doctor Perron: Well, how...

Shoemaker: ...simply because...um...w-uh, because, I, of things I know about the conditions of the home. Uh...

Doctor Perron: Well, this is...

Shoemaker: That is, is not...(man in background mumbling "not okay") it's not going to be a good place to meet.

Doctor Perron: Well, they...this is again, why...

Shoemaker: Um...

Doctor Perron: Personally, I wouldn't have a problem with even, uh, seeing the address itself, to get another kind of understanding of the perspective from, uh, Christian's angle. Um...

Shoemaker: Mm-hmm.

Doctor Perron: At least, at least that was, the uh, the silver cloud of the lining that I was taking away from it. Um, like I said, it is rather unorthodox, but Christian requested it. And, uh, it may be, uh...prudent, I think...

Shoemaker: They...they, um, are having an infestation problem in that home.

Doctor Perron: Oh, really?

Shoemaker: And, yeah. And, and, the health department has already visited there, and...

Doctor Perron: Oh, my goodness.

Shoemaker: It...would probably not be a real wise place for you to go.

Doctor Perron: Are they still, are they still living there, or have they taken up alternate accommodation? Because, according to, uh, Mr. Bell and Christian, they were still living there....

Shoemaker: No. Yeah, they are still living there.

Doctor Perron: With an infestation, in Christian's condition?

Shoemaker: Mm-hmm!

Doctor Perron: Well, that shouldn't...that shouldn't be at all.

Shoemaker: Uh, no. No it shouldn't, and, uh, the social services and the health department have, have been a part of that.

Doctor Perron: Have you, have you spoken with social services yourself? Because we uh, we've yet to speak with him.

Shoemaker: I, I have not...uh, I have spoken with health department people.

Doctor Perron: Yes. I, I understood that you were sort of, um, uh, a personal assistant almost, and uh, as well as a counselor to Christian, you've accompanied him to several things before, so...

Shoemaker: Yes. Yes. Yes I have.

Doctor Perron: Mm.

Shoemaker: Absolutely, and I will be very happy to, to assist in, in whatever way I can.

Doctor Perron: I'm, I...I'm not happy to hear about this infestation problem, uh, especially with Christian the way he is. Is there, is there any chance you could, uh, sort out some kind of alternate accommodation? Do you, have that kind of services at your disposal?

Shoemaker: Um...certainly you could meet at the church.

Doctor Perron: No, I meant...for actual accommodation for Christian.

Shoemaker: Oh, uh...that...that, that has to be, has to be handled through...uh...he's, he's not requesting anything alter-alternate. And any decisions like that have to come through social services, and that has been a long history as well.

Doctor Perron: That's-that's...that's why I was recommending...perhaps, if you had a sort of, um, a sort of church outreach program where you could offer temporary accommodation just until the trial's finished with, maybe Christian would be willing to go along with that. 'Cause, I, um...I understand that he doesn't want to move from his residence, but I also understand the infestation's a very bad thing at the moment. Especially with everything that's going on, so...we might want to recommend something that...

Shoemaker: Uh, well, this has been, has been, has been a situation ongoing over...many months. And, um, uh, Christian, Christian seems to feel that he has stayed away from it. Uh, but that requires him to stay just in one room...

Doctor Perron: The infestation.

Shoemaker: Um...and, uh, heal-health services have, have talked with the family. Uh, so, it-it simply, uh, we have, we have always met with the family at the church or at the lawyer's, or with Christian somewhere wi-...in town. They have never wanted us to come to the house...

Doctor Perron: No, I can't understand...

Shoemaker: And...and, uh, I-I don't think Christian would be comfortable with me coming there.

Doctor Perron: Well, he-he did request, well I, I assume he requested that you would be there as well, but he did ask me to come down there to the residence. I don't really know what that's about now, or if Mr. Bell's going to be there or not.

Shoemaker: Yeah...uh, I, I would...

Doctor Perron: Personally, personally...

Shoemaker: I would be happy to talk with him...

Doctor Perron: Personally, I have no problem going down there myself...

Shoemaker: ...and, and see if I can...pardon?

Doctor Perron: I said, personally I have no problem going down there myself, I'm sure, I've seen far worse places...whatever kind of, infestations are going on. Um, but I was kind of hoping that we could have counted on your support to come along. If only, to sort of...

Shoemaker: Um...

Doctor Perron: ...to sort of handle the introductions in a personal way, with someone that Christian already knows.

Shoemaker: Mm...yeah. Uh...let me, let me talk with Christian and see if the same thing could be done at the church.

Doctor Perron: All right. I'll tell you what, I'll uh...I'll ask my secretary to give you a call back, and we'll try and go from there.

Shoemaker: Okay.

Doctor Perron: All right, should be about...in an hour or two.

Shoemaker: Okay...

Doctor Perron: I've got to, uh...

Shoemaker: Can I have your name again, please?

Doctor Perron: Uh, this is Dr. Perron. P-E-double R-O-N.

Shoemaker: ....Doctor...Perron?

Doctor Perron: P-Perron. P-E-double R-O-N.

Shoemaker: Uh-huh.

Doctor Perron: Yes.

Shoemaker: Okay, and...

Doctor Perron: I'm all set to give you a call back, and hopefully we can figure out what's going on before, uh, before Saturday.

Shoemaker: Yeah, yeah, uh....let me, let me call Christian and, and see...I-I just...I would have, working on a...on a family systems and on a pastoral counseling psychological basis...

Doctor Perron: Right.

Shoemaker: I-I would not think that that would be a good place to do the interview. Uh, they're going to be defensive. They're going to be trying to...

Doctor Perron: Christian...

Shoemaker: ...protect you from...

Doctor Perron: Yes...

Shoemaker: ...uh, the nurses that went out there found that a very difficult place to try to work with them.

Doctor Perron: Well, even so...

Shoemaker: Um...

Doctor Perron: It...it would make sense though, in order to just, to gain that kind of persepective and see things from Christian's angle a little more. I-I-I do understand what you're saying about trying to put it in a, uh, a neutral environment, but, uh...I'm not too sure now. I wasn't aware that it's as bad as you say it was.

Shoemaker: I have not been there, and I do not know...

Doctor Perron: Oh.

Shoemaker: But...um, except from what the nurses have said.

Doctor Perron: Uh, which nurses were these?

Shoemaker: Public health...nurses.

Doctor Perron: And how long ago was that? Was that...was that fairly recent?

Shoemaker: That, that was, uh...around the time of his father's death, his father's death. They were out there because of...

Doctor Perron: I have no idea...

Shoemaker: ...paitent discharge procedures and such...

Doctor Perron: All that would have been about, um two or three months ago, I think. So yes, that is recent.

Shoemaker: And, and, he was...he was, while he was in the hospital, under quarantine because of it.

Doctor Perron: Christian was?

Shoemaker: No, Christian's father.

Doctor Perron: Oh, oh. So he, he's, he contracted something from the...from the infestation?

Shoemaker: He, he had...had, bug bites all over him.

Doctor Perron: Oh, gee. Good God. Well that's...all right, uh, Miss, uh Mis-is it Miss or Mrs. Shoemaker?

Shoemaker: M-M-Miss Shoemaker.

Doctor Perron: Miss Shoemaker.

Shoemaker: Miss Shoemaker.

Doctor Perron: Um, I, I...

Shoemaker: It's Reverend Shoemaker, actually.

Doctor Perron: I'm sorry?

Shoemaker: I-I said actually, I-I...officially, it's Reverend Shoemaker.

Doctor Perron: Oh, rev-I didn't realize. Okay, um...all right, I think the best way to proceed, if you could, um, if you could speak with your church outreach group, if you could find some kind of temporary accommodation for Christian and his mother...uh, just until the, uh, the court case is over...we can, perhaps, see if we can get the state to fund a cleanup or something in the process. Because that's quite horrendous. And I think we can do something about it. We should...so, if you could find some kind of temporary accommodation for them, uh...

Shoemaker: Um...

Doctor Perron: ...preferably within the church, because I can understand they wouldn't want to go with, uh, outside strangers...uh, I quite understand.

Shoemaker: I...really doubt that they would receive that offer at all. They have not, they have not received help from social services.

Doctor Perron: Well, you could understand why it would be in Christian's best interest if you could do that, because if he was to go to the court and if they were to present an assessment with, that he was living in such conditions along with his mother...then it would not fare well at all...

Shoemaker: Mm-hmm.

Doctor Perron: ...and they would perhaps be completely evicted from the property. And that wouldn't be in their interests even in the least.

Shoemaker: Yeah. Um...

Doctor Perron: I'm not, I'm not asking you to do this, but I-I think it would be a, uh, wise thing to do.

Shoemaker: I-I-I can see, I can see your point and I'll certainly talk with Mr. Bell, about...

Doctor Perron: Yes.

Shoemaker: ...about whether he would rather see Christian in such a situation. Um...

Doctor Perron: It, it, i-i-it wouldn't be permanent, it would only have to be temporary, just until the trial is, uh, done with and we could perhaps fund a, cleanup, while they were in there, they wouldn't have to end up back for that...

Shoemaker: Mm-hmm.

Doctor Perron: So, perhaps we could do that.

Shoemaker: Mm-hmm.

Doctor Perron: Anyway, I do have to be going off, but if you could call this week with Christian, and I'll try to have somebody, uh, or possibly myself calling back in about, uh...two hours. Okay?

Shoemaker: About...how many hours?

Doctor Perron: About, uh, two hours.

Shoemaker: About two hours...from now?

Doctor Perron: Yes, uh, are you going to be there? (unintelligible)

Shoemaker: Uh, yeah, yeah. I'll be up until eleven, so yes.

Doctor Perron: Okay. Yeah, I'm sorry 'bout that. Um...all right, I've got to be getting off, but thank you very much for speaking.

Shoemaker: Okay.

Doctor Perron: Okay, thank you. Goodbye.

(Skype hangup sound.)

Doctor Perron: God, damn. *sighs* I was not expecting ANY of that. (typing)

==External links==
*[http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?s1o5yaa51ga7lpc Download link]

{{FanChats}}

[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Phone calls]]

User talk:Fuck you everyone

2011-12-11T19:56:11Z

Griffintown:

{{welcome|Freecell}}

==Your recent edits==

Please read the rules before you make edits. They aren't really that long and following them will prevent your edits from getting undone. The CWCki isn't ED. Reaction images aren't allowed because they bloat pages without actually being funny. Superfluous information is also removed: the CWCki provides a product, and the people who read these articles are going to want them to be succinct. Yeah, editing the CWCki has a bit of a learning curve to it. Either way, welcome to the CWCki. —Preceding [[Wikipedia:Signatures|unsigned]] comment added by [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] ([[User talk:Freecell|talk]] • [[Special:Contributions/Freecell|contribs]]) 22:39, 10 December 2011 (PST)

Dude, don't start an edit war here. Lurk moar and read the rules. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 11:56, 11 December 2011 (PST)

Talk:Rocky Shoemaker call

2011-12-11T17:16:14Z

Griffintown:

To be honest, I'm not entirely comfortable with this being here, but not for the reasons you think. While technically Virginia allows for recording calls with the consent of one party (i.e. the party that's recording), I think Rocky might be bothered by a private call being here. Unlike Chris, she most likely has an IQ greater than that of a brick and would be bothered by the invasion of her privacy and that sort of thing. Secondly, why do we have to have the entire conversation here? That's what irks me sometimes, people think we need to mirror and host everything connected with Chris. I don't think so, I think we should just cite the audio file and that's sufficient as opposed to having an entire article about the call with a full transcript. Thirdly, I think this would set a dangerous precedent, as I'd rather not see people harass people connected to Chris for content. These people, unlike Chris, probably do mind if a stranger calls them, talks about their acquaintance with Chris, however nebulous, and then posts their private call for the entire Internet to see.

I realize that this provides valuable information but I'd rather see this information obtained through other means, such as public records or that sort of thing.

If we are to keep it, I'd recommend wikifying the transcript and categorizing the call.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 04:40, 11 December 2011 (PST)

:Champ is good people and I agree with him. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 06:59, 11 December 2011 (PST)

*Thirded, really. God damn. --[[User:Shefap2|Shefap2]] 07:13, 11 December 2011 (PST)
** I felt the same way Champ, until I listened to the call and realized that Rocky isn't as "innocent" in this as she seems. I mean really. She tells this caller that she needs some ID or some consent from the lawyer before she talks...and then instead of hanging up like a good person would, she continues to gab about Chris. I agree that this information would have been better collected another way...and that everyone who has dealings with Chris don't necessarily need to be trolled too to get information about Chris. I guess what I'm saying is this: This doesn't need it's own page, but I believe it should be noted in the Rocky Shoemaker article that there is audio of a call between a troll pretending to be a doctor and her and that she gave some information about the Chandler's living condition. And then a link to the audio file could be given. This whole transcript isn't necessary; is it really all that shocking that the Chandler house is a filthy, invested, mess? --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 08:30, 11 December 2011 (PST)
*** The infestation had everything to do with the topic of meeting at Christian's house and wasn't "gabbing". -- [[User:Mexican|Mexican]] 08:45, 11 December 2011 (PST)
**I agree with Champ. When push come to shove, Rocky got more resources and smarts than Chris. Having the contents of that call here might irks her. I agree with adding some snippets of the calls in a form of "Rocky said..."and let the whole audio as a reference out of the CWCki. Yes, no shit is too small but we need to think about any liability that can come from this. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 09:16, 11 December 2011 (PST)

Semen

2011-12-11T02:43:21Z

Griffintown: Reverted edits by DrPepper47 (talk) to last revision by Croatchu

{{Articleofthenow}}
{{Honest}}
[[Image:CWCcomeuppancemedallion.JPG|thumb|right|250px|The closest [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Crystal]] will ever get to touching the [[Medallion|Medallion of Fail]].]]

'''Semen''' is the fluid secreted by the gonads of males to impregnate females. [[Christian Weston Chandler]] has many misconceptions about its purpose.

Despite being "[[honest]]" about [[sex]], Chris is sometimes uncomfortable saying "semen" and occasionally uses his own unique bowdlerized terms, such as "'''comeuppance'''" or "'''navy'''."

==Comeuppance==

In the context of sex (especially oral) with his [[TRUE and HONEST]] [[sweetheart]], Chris refers to DROPPIN' FUCKIN' LOADS as "comeuppance," as seen here:

{{quote|Uh, it just feels so good, unngghh, and because me being a [[virgin]], I would let you keep your mouth over my penis and then sooner than expected, I '''feel my comeuppance''' and I come into your mouth, my semen is inside your mouth and you'd swallow every drop.|Chris, "My First Time"<ref name="Chris_Sex_Logs#I_am_perverted">[[Chris_Sex_Logs#I_am_perverted]]</ref>}}

{{quote|Yeah, and I'm just gonna keep bangin' your BREASTS OVER AND OVER AGAIN until you get the first DOSAGE of my comeuppance!|Chris, [[Kacey Phone Call]]}}

Chris presumably coined the term because a) ejaculate is called "come," b) it goes "up" when it comes out of his bent [[duck]], and c) he's an idiot. However, this created a shitstorm when his sex tapes dropped, because [[Wikipedia:Webster's Dictionary|Webster's]] defines comeuppance as "a deserved rebuke or penalty."<ref>http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/comeuppance</ref> While Chris most likely heard this word and thought it would make a clever euphemism for "cum", the true meaning and its context seems to suggest an eerie [[Wikipedia:Freudian slip|Freudian slip]].

===A tasty treat===
[[File:GotMilk.jpg|thumb|200px|No caption is necessary.]]
Chris believes that whatever he eats changes the flavor of semen, which may have some basis in fact.<ref>http://ezinearticles.com/?Sperm-Taste---10-Simple-Tips-For-Better-Tasting-Semen&id=164106</ref> However, what makes this ridiculous is that Chris thinks his semen will taste ''exactly'' like whatever he eats. He has indicated that he would strive for flavored comeuppance so his sweetheart/cum dumpster would savor the taste. In the sex tape audio, Chris presented the following scenario to [[PandaHalo]]:

{{quote|I would have eaten so much [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|chocolate]], that day beforehand, and it would taste so yummy to you, probably like white chocolate. You'd swallow that.|Chris<ref name="Chris_Sex_Logs#I_am_perverted"/>}}

In subsequent chats with [[Julie]], this fantasy was revised so that his comeuppance would taste like [[Wikipedia:strawberry|strawberries]].<ref>[[Mumble 3]]</ref>

Coincidentally, sweets and other unhealthy foods are known to make semen taste even worse than usual. Chocolate is one of the worst offenders.

==Recycling==

{{quote|Mmm! Goes down salty.|Chris}}

Another tidbit revealed in the sex tapes was that when Chris [[mass debate|masturbates]] he makes sure to ejaculate into a [[Fapcup|plastic cup]], to avoid making a mess.<ref>[[Chris Sex Logs#Chris on Masturbation and the Sex Joke]]</ref> Shortly after this news broke, talk began to grow that Chris actually drinks from this cup.

The initial assumption, given Chris's hard stance on [[homos]], was that Chris was a devout, fundamentalist Christian and therefore had a rigid interpretation of the Biblical story of [[Wikipedia:Onan|Onan]]<ref>http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/2205/what-exactly-was-the-sin-of-onan</ref> (This was before we found out Chris wouldn't know anything about the Bible unless he heard it on ''[[Family Guy]]''). Eventually the real reason was discovered: Chris believes that by ingesting his own sperm he can "recycle" it, so that none of his potential children are lost, and so that his "semen count" (presumably he meant "sperm count") remains high, as though everyone is born with a finite number of sperm that they can eventually run out of if they don't swallow more.

For a time there was no concrete evidence to support this outrageous claim, so Chris wisely decided to confirm it as fact. Multiple times.

[21:08] [11:36:35 AM] Sarah Cassandra McKenzie says: have you ever tasted your own semen
[21:08] [11:37:42 AM] Christopher C.W.C. says: KEEP IT SECRET, but I actually have; I recycle my semen
until I get together with my Sweetheart (you) for the first time.
[21:08] [11:38:10 AM] Sarah Cassandra McKenzie says: ohhhh.. so that's why you do it in a cup
[21:08] [11:38:38 AM] Christopher C.W.C. says: yes; after recycle, I rinse the cup and dispose of it.
[21:10] [11:40:03 AM] Sarah Cassandra McKenzie says: where did you come up with the idea of swallowing
your own semen to recycle it after you cummed? Was it on a sex site or your own idea?
[21:10] [11:40:13 AM] Christopher C.W.C. says: MY OWN IDEA.
[21:12] [11:41:23 AM] Christopher C.W.C. says: IMHO, it's often unsatisfying to me upon swallowing,
because it's not being truly enjoyed by my Sweetheart.

FACT: If swallowing is "often unsatisfying" for Chris, that means that sometimes [[homo|it ''is'' satisfying]].

Not convinced? Try this:

{{quote|Uh, no, I don't think so, uh, because I've done that [drinking semen after masturbating], it's called "recycling it." Yeah, so it's basically recycling so, like uh, so he doesn't necessarily lose it. I mean, 'cause you know, if you think of it as a waste if you banged it out and then you, uh and then you flushed it down the commode or leave it in the condom in the garbage can...Though personally, I've been getting sick of swallowing my own, so lately I've been disposing of them.|Chris, [[Mumble 8|Mumble chat, 17 February 2009]]}}

[[Image:Recycle.jpg|thumb|right|Yes, he really does it...]]

In case you still don't believe it, Chris made a [[April 16 Fetish Vids|video]] for [[Ivy]] of himself drinking his jizz, which [[Clyde Cash]] leaked on 16 April 2009.<ref>http://www.slutload.com/watch/M20g7MWCNa5/Chris-chan-Fanta-and-Cum.html</ref> Chris had previously alleged that his semen would take on the flavor of any sort of fruits or sweets he recently consumed. So eating strawberries would lead to strawberry flavored semen and eating chocolate would lead to chocolate flavored semen. Ivy wanted him to test this theory. She requested he drink his semen and compare it to chocolate syrup. In the video, Chris explains that he doesn't have any chocolate milk [sic] handy. Instead, he mixed it with some orange Fanta, completely missing the point of her request was to compare the flavor.

Just to make sure everyone on Earth knows about it, Chris later made a [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009|video]] admitting and justifying the existence of the cum-guzzling footage.

{{quote|I recycle my own semen, because, uh, you know, yes I do masturbate--I'm not ashamed to admit it--as a lot of guys, I'm sure, have done the same thing in their time. Anyway, uh, basically I--yeah, into the cup and--yeah, I recycle it. So that that way I won't lose any, uh, unborn children. So then I can--then I can also still have a good number of...a good semen count. Keep maintain that by recycling it.|Chris, defending the rights of the unborn, 28 April 2009}}

Chris has some advice for all you men out there too:

{{quote|And depending on the taste of it, uh, to the original owners...of the--their respective semen, uh, it's a good idea to recycle, but if, uh, you don--if you don--if you feel uncomfortable, uh, doing it or it tastes bad to you, then, uh, then you don't have to do it.|Chris, giving everyone his permission to not swallow semen, 28 April 2009}}

Questions remain about his recycling plan. If he doesn't want to lose even a single unborn child, does that mean he plans to eventually father millions of children? Is he really dumb enough to believe his navy will survive digestion? (That's a rhetorical question.) And what happens to the comeuppance he wants to leave in his sweetheart's mouth — does that magically teleport back where it came from, or can women get pregnant from oral sex? Sadly, these questions will never be answered, as Chris will never actually deposit his semen anywhere except his own throat (or [[Kimmi]]'s plastic [[china]].)

In the Kacey calls, Chris has also suggested interest in drinking his semen for arousal:
{{quote|And then you know what, I'm going to lick it, I'm gonna lick it off your face, and then we're gonna share it in our tongue like tongue sharing MOMENT!|Chris, [[Kacey Phone Call]], after describing how he would titfuck Kacey}}
{{Clear}}

In [[Mailbag 30]], Chris announced that he had [[Mailbag_30#Chris quit guzzling cum|kicked the habit]], although the validity of this statement is questionable at best, considering his [[List of Chris's lies|track record]] for telling the truth.

When [[Bob]] described a youthful adventure (c. [[Pre-1980#1940s|1948]]) from his youth to [[Emily]], Chris blurted out ''" I'd been hanging around in hi- inside him while he was taking that trip!"''<ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript]]</ref>, which implies that he believes the sperm cell that became him in mid-1981 had existed for over thirty years, and had presumably been ejaculated and recycled by his father many, many times.

== Sources ==
<references/>

==See also==
*[[Mass debating]]
*[[April 16 Fetish Vids]]

[[Category:Physical characteristics]][[Category:Things Chris likes]]

Template talk:Da update

2011-12-09T19:56:19Z

Griffintown:

==Three videos from the 12th==
Why are they not here? We have Chris singing, Chris out in public with actual sunlight, and making a dumb as fuck comment, that is what an update is, my friends. You may be saying "But Champthom, why haven't you?" and I say to you "NO U!" Seriously, stuff should go on this template first before it ends up on the CWChronology. Srsly. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 03:30, 15 July 2009 (CEST)

==Gardening==
Did a little gardening by removing a few of the posts from this template. It was taking up quite a bit of room on the main page.

Remember to add to both [[Da Update]] and the corresponding month and vice versa, sometimes this doesn't happen. [[User:Granola|Granola]] 02:11, 16 August 2009 (CEST)

== Da update versus CWCipediaTracker ==

People, please, given the status of the CWCipedia, all CWCipedia related updates belong in the [[:Template:CWCipediaTracker|CWCipedia Tracker]] whereas things like new videos, leaked material, etc. belong here in Da update.

Seriously, I am disappoint. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 02:36, 17 February 2010 (UTC)
* I think a lot of that is my fault. I didn't understand the difference; I assumed they overlapped. Sorry about that. - [[User:Liquid!|Liquid!]] 15:17, 17 February 2010 (UTC)

== A book? ==

Chris is seriously writing a book? That can't be true. Also, he mentions that one of his "gal friends" is helping him write it. This has got to be one of Chris's lies. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 02:04, 10 March 2010 (UTC)
:* Maybe he's getting over ''Sonichu'' even if he promised a super-duper issue for the tenth anniversary of the Fail-Comic. As far as the "Lady-Friend" goes, we saw her in a previous video. (Hint; she's inflatable). [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 02:31, 10 March 2010 (UTC)
:::I feel sorry for [[Kimmi]]. She is always dragged into Chris's bullshit and she is unable to object to it. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 02:58, 10 March 2010 (UTC)
*Guys, [[CWCki:NOTAFORUM|CWCki is not a forum]]. Stuff like this doesn't belong here. There's other places to discuss this like [http://legi0n.789chan.org/cwc/res/25081.html this Krapple thread] or something like that. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 03:20, 10 March 2010 (UTC)

== It should be obvious but ==

Only Chris related updates belong here.

Shit like [[Sonichu: The Animated Series]] can go on the [[Fan:Index]].

Srsly, don't pull this shit again or else someone is getting banned. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 21:46, 22 March 2010 (UTC)

== Important something which I will delete in a minute ==
Damnit, how do I get to the cwcipedia tracker? Mailbag 60 is up. [[User:Thelieisacake|Thelieisacake]] 23:49, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
*I got it covered. In future, when you edit the main page, it'll give a link to the templates used on the main page at the bottom. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 00:08, 7 April 2010 (UTC)

==Suggested Update==
Someone added Sydney getting busted to the months events, so did we want to add it here?

Suggestion: In a rare win for Chris, the manchild identifies and shoots down a [[Sydney Contacts|troll]] based off information garnered from the troll forums.

--[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 23:45, 13 May 2010 (UTC)

I assume that you told nobody of your plan to pose as a girl with the intent of getting him to answer the Mailbag again. It wasn't any moment of clarity, he just had you mixed up with Jackie.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 00:07, 14 May 2010 (UTC)
:*I am firmly 'No Comment'ing anything that relates to how, precisely, Sydney's cover was blown. Sorry mate. If you are desperate to know, you should know where to go to ask. PS <3 your rambles, FYI. --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 01:04, 14 May 2010 (UTC)

== 17 June ==

Chris just returned to Twitter. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 01:04, 18 July 2010 (UTC)

:Is there a reason you're putting this on the talk page instead of the actual template? --[[User:T K 19|T K 19]] 01:30, 18 July 2010 (UTC)
::<del>Template's locked.</del> Now for some reason it's open again. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 01:32, 18 July 2010 (UTC)

== Template locked ==

For the mall waiting video I think we should take the 'money' part out to avoid suspicion and revert it to 'unknown reason'. - [[User:Liquid!|Liquid!]] 17:20, 2 September 2010 (PDT)
*Why? I thought CWCki was against censorship. [[User:Pfargtl9000|Pfargtl9000 Spam and Eggs]] 17:27, 2 September 2010 (PDT)
**You need to unlock the template... [[Clyde_and_Tito_PS3_E-mails]] needs to be added...
**If we show that we know what Chris was waiting for, it could harm a very promising saga. I thought this was one of the things that we would keep quiet for now until it's safe to let Chris know that we be trollin'. - [[User:Liquid!|Liquid!]] 23:42, 2 September 2010 (PDT)
***Ohh... I see. I GUESS that makes sense, but the article is definitely on the CWCki and linked from quite a few pages. He might just search for it and find it anyway... but knowing Chris, that's not too likely. --[[User:Miss Noel|Noel Ari Paige]] 05:26, 3 September 2010 (PDT)

== I found something. ==

As of now on the Rule 34 Pahael site they have the picture of sailor moon Chris-chan as the featured image. Is this notable? Anyone care? [[User:No.|Written by this person.]] 15:30, 16 September 2010 (PDT)
:It's already been uploaded and added to the [[Sailor Moon]] article. --[[User:Xanabit|Xanabit]] 15:36, 16 September 2010 (PDT)

== Is there a reason for a lack of new update notices? ==

--[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 10:43, 23 September 2010 (PDT)
:I had a stab at it. With so many leaked documents recently, it's easy to forget about da update =) --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 12:06, 23 September 2010 (PDT)

== Notability and Da update ==

What makes something worthy of being included in Da update? If something's worth mentioning on the [[July 2011|monthly chronology]], wouldn't it also warrant a mention on Da update? I'm thinking specifically of the entry "21 July: Chris reveals his identity in a Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia post." from [[July 2011|here]].

== 'Where no shit is too minor.' ==
Why was the phone message update deleted? It was quite relevant if you think about it, as he sounded legitimately unwell. It is worth at least some discussion. --[[User:Reldnahc C|I am tomgirlmanbearpig]] 06:48, 9 December 2011 (PST)
: One word; Liability. I believe there's legal consequences in linking this material here. Now that the Virginian justice system is dealing with Chris, better not putting a lightning rod on top of this site. If Chris is dumb enough to not try to close the CWCki, Rocky is another matter. Download the audio and stash it, just don't post it here. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 07:53, 9 December 2011 (PST)
::I think he means the answering machine thing. The reason that's not up here is just because it's not "big" enough. Quite a few people only check the CWCki to look at the update. What goes in the update should be big enough to pique their interest. "Chris says he's sick" isn't good enough. —Preceding [[Wikipedia:Signatures|unsigned]] comment added by [[User:Freecell|Freecell]] ([[User talk:Freecell|talk]] • [[Special:Contributions/Freecell|contribs]]) 07:58, 9 December 2011 (PST)
:: What the heck did Griffintown thing he meant? Feel free to say you can't say... but what the heck was up here that would have been considered a 'liability'? --[[User:4Macie|4Macie]] 09:42, 9 December 2011 (PST)
:::There's an audio file out there with Rocky talking about Chris. It's on the /cwc/ and I thought we were talking about this audio. As far as the answering machine's message goes, it doesn't fit on the update page. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 11:56, 9 December 2011 (PST)
:We also lack an exact date of when he changed the message. It may have been that way for a while. The liability thing is not an issue - it's more than beyond the scope of the court proceedings. But yeah - the main point is - no shit is to minor re: the CWCki in general - but Da update bulletins are reserved for significant developments, such as the release of new material (by Chris or about Chris from true trolls) or events that involve Chris or a major actor in his life so far. A dry spell for Chris news is not an excuse to lower the bar of what's significant and what isn't. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 11:35, 9 December 2011 (PST)

Template talk:Da update

2011-12-09T15:53:17Z

Griffintown:

List of restaurants

2011-12-01T05:50:07Z

Griffintown: Unrelated to Chris and without any source.

{{taxpayermoney}}
[[Chris]] isn't much of a cook, nor is anyone else currently living at [[14 Branchland Court]]. When he's not eating reheated frozen dinners, he's usually chowing down at a variety of local '''restaurants'''.

==McDonald's==
{{main|McDonald's}}
Chris's cheap-and-easy fast food of choice. When he wanted to cut down on his Big Mac and McNugget intake, he stopped eating there...more than twice a week or so.

== Burger King ==
{{main|Burger King}}
Chris favors McDonald's, while [[Bob]] preferred its rival Burger King. Thus, Chris usually ate here when he was out with his father.

== Chick-fil-A ==

[[Image:ChickFilA.jpg|thumb|right|Admittedly, the store might've been a [[Chris and writing|literary influence.]]]]

'''Chick-fil-A''' is a fast-food restaurant chain originating in the American south that Chris frequents, famous for its chicken sandwiches and always being closed on Sundays (due to their founder's Christian "seventh day of rest" beliefs). Reputedly one of the most 'healthy' fast food options;<ref>http://health.yahoo.com/experts/eatthis/11230/americas-bestand-worstrestaurants</ref> however, Chris has mentioned it much less often than its [[Chris and health|artery-clogging]] big brother, [[McDonald's]].

Possibly its lack of marketing campaigns aimed at children and foolish sweepstakes or [[My Coke Rewards|"reward programs"]] keep Chick-fil-A from maintaining the loyalty of creepy loitering manchildren. Thus, Chris has never been banned from a Chick-fil-A in an [[Sonichu 3#Sub-Episode 4: Christian Chandler in "McAttack"|epic showdown]] battling [[jerkops]].

===Appearances===
*Chris met up with [[Emily]] in front of the Chick-fil-A at [[Charlottesville Fashion Square]]. [[Apology to Emily|Or at least tried to by calling out to the patrons (who were undoubtedly amused and perplexed)]].

*The Fashion Square Chick-fil-A was the site of one of the missed meetings between Chris and [[Surfshack Tito]]'s agents during the drama over destroying Chris's [[PS3]].

*The [[CWCville Shopping Center]] includes a lone Chick-Fil-A on the 2nd floor.

== Sheetz ==
Sheetz is a chain of gas station/mini-mart stores based in Pennsylvania with stores in five other states (including Virginia) in the United States. Among the chain's selling points is an array of fast food options.

===References by Chris===
*Chris ended [[Mumble 5]] by saying he needed to duck out to Sheetz to get his mother a sandwich.
*In the e-mail revealing the [[muscle bra]], Chris mentioned that he'd sought a job application at Sheetz.
*While chatting with [[Sarah May Skype Logs|Sarah May]] in February 2009, Chris noted a trip to Sheetz for gasoline.
*Attempting to defend his dietary choices in one of the [[Kacey Call 8|Kacey phone calls]], Chris claimed that he enjoyed fruit smoothies from Sheetz (which can easily crack 600 calories apiece).

== Country Cookin ==

'''Country Cookin''' - spelled without a "G" or an apostrophe (oh, those wacky rednecks) - is [[Christian]]'s not-quite-fast-food restaurant of choice. It is a Virginia-based chain of rustic steak house/buffet and grill restaurants, akin to [[Golden Corral]], ''Roadhouse Grill'' or ''Ponderosa/Bonanza Steakhouse'' in the US, and ''Harvester'', ''Beefeater'' or ''Brewer's Fayre'' in the [[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!|United Kingdom]].

He has mentioned it on several occasions and even has taken his troll friend [[Joshua Martinez]] there.

===References by Chris===
* In an e-mail conversation with [[Anna McLerran]] from 2007, Chris mentioned his regular trips to the restaurant with Joshua.
* In [[Mumble 2]], Chris mentioned Country Cookin as one of his favorite restaurants.
* A Country Cookin branch is located in the [[CWCville Shopping Center]].

== Golden Corral ==

'''Golden Corral''' is an all-you-can-eat buffet chain, well-known in the American South and Midwest as ''the'' place to go for a maximum ratio of calories consumed to cash expended. Just don't think too much about where it all came from. During Chris's [[Emily Date Conversation Transcript|date with Emily]], [[Bob]] mentions that he had a heart attack there while paying for the family's meal<ref>http://www.sonichu.com/cwcki/Emily_Date_Conversation_Transcript#Bob.27s_health_problems_revisited_.2829:59_-_32:11.29</ref>. Despite this, it was one of Chris's favorite places to eat, probably since he could [[obesity|stuff his face]] with fatty, low quality food at a [[Chris and money|low price]]. However, it is now out of business and has been replaced by a Japanese buffet.<ref>http://www2.dailyprogress.com/news/cdp-news-local/2010/jun/11/golden_corral_to_close_doors-ar-319488/</ref>

===References by Chris===
*[[Caitlin]], a waitress Chris had a crush on for a day or so, worked at Golden Corral.
*In [[Mumble 2]], he mentioned that it's one of his favorite places to eat.
*Describing his ideal date spots in an [[IRC (18 December 2008)|IRC chat]], Chris proposed Golden Corral as a second-date destination.
*Chris's visits to the Corral with his family seem to be tightly scheduled. In a [[MySpace]] conversation from 04 September 2005, he noted that they'd be there from 3:30 to 4:45 the next day.
*Perhaps because of that precise schedule, or perhaps because he was simply overwhelmed by [[stress]], during his final [[BlueSpike Skype Logs 13|Skype conversation with BlueSpike]] Chris unexpectedly abandoned the conversation to take off for the Corral.
*In his profile at [[The Hook Cafe]] he lists it as his favorite restaurant.

==References==
<references/>

{{Places}}
[[Category:Places]]
[[Category:Lists]]

Template:Da update

2011-11-27T18:04:58Z

Griffintown:

<center>[[Image:News.jpg]]</center>
*19 [[November 2011|November]]: A [[Dating Ad.mp4|long lost personal ad]] is discovered almost three years after it was recorded.
*12 [[November 2011|November]]: Chris's [[Robee Sonee and the Tomgirls|latest fictional band]] has its debut [[tomgirl]]-themed [[SPARKLE like you mean it: ROBEE'S BALLAD|album]] leaked.
*07 [[November 2011|November]]: Chris goes to his [[28 October 2011|court hearing]]. No charges are dropped.
*04 [[November 2011|November]]: Chris releases photographs of [[Michael Snyder]] from his latest visit to [[the GAMe PLACe]].
*28 [[October 2011|October]]: Chris and [[Barbara|his mother]] are [[28 October 2011|arrested for multiple offenses]] at [[the GAMe PLACe]]. They are bailed out two days later.
*18 [[October 2011|October]]: Chris lists a twelve-year-old television set on [[Craigslist]] and expects more than $250 for it.

<noinclude>{{clear}}{{Usage|1= This template sits in a place of pride on the CWCki [[Main Page]]. It is a list of recent Chris-related activity, namely new content. To prevent the list becoming too long, older entries should be removed as newer ones are added - with no more than 6 or 7 entries being displayed. To add new update to the list, simply edit this template and place a brief description of what happened at the top of bulleted list. Entries should also be documented on the [[{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}} {{CURRENTYEAR}}|current month article]].}}[[Category:Front page templates]]</noinclude>

Template:Da update

2011-11-04T23:54:31Z

Griffintown:

<center>[[Image:News.jpg]]</center>
*04 [[November 2011|November]]: Photographs of [[Michael Snyder]] are allegedly released.
*18 [[October 2011|October]]: Chris lists a twelve-year-old television set on [[Craigslist]] and expects more than $250 for it.
*24 [[September 2011|September]]: A [[Chris_in_the_media#Slylock_Fox|drawing of Sonichu]] is published in thousands of newspapers thanks to [[wikipedia:Slylock_Fox_%26_Comics_for_Kids|Slylock Fox]].
*12 [[September 2011|September]]: [[Bob]]'s funeral is held at Monticello Memorial Gardens in Charlottesville at 10 a.m.
*6 [[September 2011|September]]: [[Bob]] [http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/dailyprogress/obituary.aspx?n=robert-franklin-chandler&pid=153539600 dies] at Martha Jefferson Hospital ICU, surrounded by family and friends.
*30 [[August 2011|August]]: Chris releases [[Asperchu|Alec Benson Leary's]] bio and picture in [[Christopher Paul Whitney reveal|a video]].

<noinclude>{{clear}}{{Usage|1= This template sits in a place of pride on the CWCki [[Main Page]]. It is a list of recent Chris-related activity, namely new content. To prevent the list becoming too long, older entries should be removed as newer ones are added - with no more than 6 or 7 entries being displayed. To add new update to the list, simply edit this template and place a brief description of what happened at the top of bulleted list. Entries should also be documented on the [[{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}} {{CURRENTYEAR}}|current month article]].}}[[Category:Front page templates]]</noinclude>

October 2011

2011-11-01T03:36:45Z

Griffintown:

'''October 2011''' was a rather quiet month for Chris. Still possibly mourning his departed [[Bob|father]]. Judging from an attempt to sell an old TV on Craigslist, the Chandlers may have been attempting to sell stuff around the house to get some extra cash. Chris presumably spent the month moping around and playing [[PS3]] games. The [[Calling Out]] saga from [[August]] did not continue.

==Events==

*1 October - [[Barbara Chandler|Barbara]]'s 70th birthday.
*2 October - In yet another unfortunate involvement with the mainstream media, Chris inadvertently earned himself the [http://www.manboobs.co.uk/submissions/manboob_of_the_month Manboob of the Month Award]
*18 October - Chris lists an old, mid-range CRT [[Television|television]] on [[Craigslist]] for a ludicrous price of $250 "or better offer". In Chris's own [[Autism|unique words]], the television set "DEFINED SUPER BOWL SUNDAY".
*31 October - [[Halloween]]
{{Timeline}}
[[Category:Chronology]]

Kick the Autistic

2011-10-24T12:25:28Z

Griffintown:

<center>[[Image:Asspielogo.png]][[Image:Asspielogo2.png]][[Image:Asspielogo.png]][[Image:Asspielogo2.png]][[Image:Asspielogo.png]][[Image:Asspielogo2.png]][[Image:Asspielogo.png]][[Image:Asspielogo2.png]][[Image:Asspielogo.png]][[Image:Asspielogo2.png]][[Image:Asspielogo.png]][[Image:Asspielogo2.png]][[Image:Asspielogo.png]][[Image:Asspielogo2.png]][[Image:Asspielogo.png]]</center>
[[Image:KickTheAutisticWii.jpg|thumb|Now for the [[Nintendo]] Wii!]]

'''Kick the [[Autism|Autistic]]''' is the world's favorite game. This is the act of doing anything [[Chris]] doesn't like. It is very probable he has done this in the past to get "[[sex|speshul treatment]]" from "Young Ladies."

==Variations==
[[File:Kta.PNG|thumb|And on [[HEXBox]]!]]
There are many known variations of the game, and we will go through the most effective.

===Artistic Style===
Enter a competition of artistry where Chris also competes, and [[Honor roll|out-talent him]]. This is usually easily done by showing any competence at all. Favored by [[Manchester High School#Graduation|his fellow students]] and [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|that no-good Adam Stackhouse]]. Beware: Chris may [[CWC is Angry|get grumpy and shoot at your photograph.]] Or beat you up in [[Soul Calibur]].

===Chris Style===
Set yourself up as one of the most visible and recognized representatives of autism within [[Chris and the Internet|internet]] culture. [[Chris and negotiation|Act like an entitled child]] and [[Chris and Sex|develop]] horrifying [[recycling|perversions]], which you discuss on [[YouTube]]. Give other autistic people a bad reputation by association. There is a 100% chance this will result in them trolling you.

===[[Blanca]] Style===
Take the time to befriend Chris and pretend you are a [[Boyfriend Free Girl]] until Chris trusts you. Then get Chris to give you something of value to him, and destroy it.

===[[Jimmy Hill]] Style===
Chris is very funny about the material which he has plagiarized. If you are an artist troll or just bored, plagiarize Chris's plagiarized comics. He will throw a fit and "take legal action against you if not removed by 14 days." Oh wait, YOU CAN'T [[Parody|COPYRIGHT UNORIGINAL CHARACTERS]] DIPSHIT.

===[[Sweetheart]] Style===
Chris is of the completely clueless type, and will trust anyone <s>with a little bit of time</s> who claims to have a [[China|china]]. Pretend to befriend Chris, and when you have gained his trust, tell him to do something lulzy. Say you are a woman who is turned on at the thought of him drinking his own [[semen]]. Once this happens, put the goods up on [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] and wait for the lulz to come pouring in.

===[[Man in the Pickle Suit|Pickleman]] Style===
Somehow meet up with Chris while wearing a pickle suit. He will be bewildered by it and powerless to act.

===[[The Miscreants|Miscreant]] Style===
Set [[Sonichu|events]] in motion that will keep Chris from [[Virgin with rage|ever getting laid.]] Physically [[Chris and health|weaken]] him so that he can't even rape women to lose his virginity, or do anything else for that matter. Extra points for [[Jimmy Hill|clouding]] [[BlueSpike|his]] [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|judgement.]] As an added "fuck you," send <s>an impostor</s> [[Liquid Chris|The True and Honest Christian Weston Chandler]] to swipe [[Kacey|his sweetheart.]]

Keep doing this for the rest of his life, then send him to Hell where he'll be trolled for all eternity... or reincarnated as a pickle... whichever.

The current champion of this style is Chris himself.

===[[Liquid]] Style===
<s>Pretend that you are the</s> Be the TRUE and ORIGINAL creator of [[Sonichu]], the electric hedgehog Pokémon. Upload videos on [[YouTube]] detailing your many encounters with [[Clyde Cash]] and your success at attracting a boyfriend free girl. Brag about the millions you have earned thanks to Sonichu, and try to conquer the Sonichu media empire that is rightfully yours.

Alec Benson Leary of [[Asperchu]] has used a similar tactic, to much the same effect. Bonus points for buying ad space on the [[CWCipedia]].

===[[Michael Snyder]] Style===
[[List of places that have banned Chris|Ban]] him from [[The GAMe PLACe|an establishment]] for being the [[Chris and hypocrisy|entitled]], [[Chris and anger|angry]], [[Chris and his Ego|self-obsessed]], [[death threats|dangerous]] manchild that he is. Quite correctly [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|never let him back in]]. '''WARNING''': This will probably result in Chris [[6 June 2010|coming to the store]] to [[pedofork|take pictures of your daughter]] and [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|attempting to murder]] you with [[Son-Chu|his mother's car]].

===Literally===
One day, Chris will say the wrong thing to the wrong person at the wrong time, and they will literally kick the shit out of him. On that day trolls will shed tears of joy, and once again feel as if there is some sort of justice in the world. That being said, no reasonable troll should ever use physical violence to harm Chris, as there's no need to expend any sort of effort on him and it's not worth giving Chris something he could actually call the police over. (Plus, that would mean [[Chris and health#Hygiene|touching him]].) It will be much sweeter when he gets his ass handed to him by a random angry [[Niggos|African American]] or someone with an [[homos|alternate life-style]]. Even greater will be the day when he gets a little too touchy with a [[boyfriend-free girl]] and gets a face full of mace.

Examples of literally kicking the autistic include: The teachers at [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]] (barely), [[Jerkops]] (probably exaggerated) and [[Niggos#Conflicts_at_The_GAMe_PLACe|TJ from GAMe PLACe]] (almost).

However, Chris has never experienced any real physical pain in his entire life. His parents never raised a finger against him, there is no record of him being grounded, or punished in any significant way even after he was [[Bob Walks In|caught masturbating in the kitchen]]. The only exception to this is when [[Sarah Nicole Hammer]] tried to teach him how to roller-skate. Chris fell down, got a boo-boo, ran home to [[Barbara Chandler|mommy]], and vowed to never again even try to roller-skate, or, apparently, to do anything active at all.

Ever since the [[Twin Falling Towers|9/11 video]], it is believed that Chris may become the subject of a game of Kick the Autistic, featuring a guest team from the [[Wikipedia:United_States_Marine_Corps|Semper Fi Brotherhood]].

==Uses by Chris==
Recorded examples of this particular CWC-ism include the following:

*In the e-mail he sent to Sony after losing [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown]], Chris blamed his failure on "AMERICA'S FAVORITE GAME, 'KICK THE AUTISTIC!'"
*At the same time, in his first [[PSN Blogs|PSN blog entry]] cursing [[Adam Stackhouse]], he bitched and mixed his metaphors about how "I have been the dog in America's favorite game, 'KICK THE AUTISTIC' for my whole life."
*After finding out that [[PandaHalo|Panda]] was a troll during [[Vivitheg's AIM chat]], Chris whined, "And so, the world continues to play the world's favorite game of 'Kick the Autistic'."
*Addressing [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] users on 21 January 2008, Chris wrote ''"And if you have so much free time to play the cruelest game of "KICK THE AUTISTIC", then you CAN and SHOULD put the time to better use; volunteer for a social chore; take up the culture in tasteful art; go out and socialize."''
*A variation was used in Chris's second version of [[It's UGH!#Remake|Ok2bgay]], with Chris opening the video with the words "Merry Kickmas".

==Conclusion==
Remember kids, Kick the Autistic is everyone's favorite game and can be replayed over and over with Chris. He just never learns.

==See also==
*[[Jerkops]]
*[[Reggie Fils-Aimé]] - Video game president, hoping to release Kick the Autistic on all major Nintendo consoles in time for Christmas.
*[[Troll]]

==External links==
*[http://www.pictogame.com/en/play/game/bq1o8yBlHtPu_cwc-in-kick-the-autistic Click to play!!]

{{CWC-isms}}

[[Category:CWC-isms]][[Category:Things Chris hates]]

File talk:Johnny.jpg

2011-10-10T18:56:35Z

Griffintown: Created page with "What is the use of this? ~~~~"

What is the use of this? [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 11:56, 10 October 2011 (PDT)

File talk:Sonichufromgensmod.jpg

2011-10-10T18:55:27Z

Griffintown:

What the fuck is this shit? [[User:Vergilius|Vergilius]] 11:23, 10 October 2011 (PDT)

I don't see any reason why this image should be here. If no legitimate use is found for this, it will be deleted. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 11:55, 10 October 2011 (PDT)

September 2011

2011-09-25T04:19:17Z

Griffintown:

[[File:Chris 09.jpg|thumb|A sighting of Chris in September 2011]]
[[File:Sonichu In Newspaper.jpg|thumb|Chris's art is finally published for the world to see.]]
'''September 2011''' had begun with Chris basking in triumph after unmasking [[Jack Thaddeus]], [[Alec Benson Leary]] and [[Thorg]], and forcing [[Surfshack Tito]] to leave the Internet. BlueSpike's fate is to be determined, and it is not known if Chris has dox on other trolls too. The state of Virginia had recovered from an earthquake and major hurricane, yet somehow, [[Power|Chris remained safe]].

This was followed by the death of Chris's father, [[Bob Chandler]].

==Events==

*6 September - [[Bob Chandler]] dies of heart failure, two days after his 84th birthday.
*10-19 September - The [[CWCki]] is closed for a week in mourning of Bob's death.
*12 September - Bob's funeral is held at Monticello Memorial Gardens in Charlottesville at 10 a.m.
*15 September - [[Calling_Out#Calling_Out_.22Julaaaay.22_-_David|The deadline]] for [[BlueSpike|David "BlueSpike"]] to upload an apology video. This deadline passed without a new video from BlueSpike or Chris, presumably because Chris is still in mourning.
*24 September - A drawing of [[Sonichu]] is published in thousands of newspapers thanks to Slylock Fox.

{{Timeline}}
[[Category:Chronology]]

September 2011

2011-09-25T03:54:30Z

Griffintown:

[[File:Chris 09.jpg|thumb|A sighting of Chris in September 2011]]
'''September 2011''' had begun with Chris basking in triumph after unmasking [[Jack Thaddeus]], [[Alec Benson Leary]] and [[Thorg]], and forcing [[Surfshack Tito]] to leave the Internet. BlueSpike's fate is to be determined, and it is not known if Chris has dox on other trolls too. The state of Virginia had recovered from an earthquake and major hurricane, yet somehow, [[Power|Chris remained safe]].

This was followed by the death of Chris's father, [[Bob Chandler]].

==Events==

*6 September - [[Bob Chandler]] dies of heart failure, two days after his 84th birthday.
*10-19 September - The [[CWCki]] is closed for a week in mourning of Bob's death.
*12 September - Bob's funeral is held at Monticello Memorial Gardens in Charlottesville at 10 a.m.
*15 September - [[Calling_Out#Calling_Out_.22Julaaaay.22_-_David|The deadline]] for [[BlueSpike|David "BlueSpike"]] to upload an apology video. This deadline passed without a new video from BlueSpike or Chris, presumably because Chris is still in mourning.
*24 September - A drawing of [[Sonichu]] is published in thousands of newspapers thanks to Slylock Fox.

{{Timeline}}
[[Category:Chronology]]

Template:Da update

2011-09-25T03:53:05Z

Griffintown:

<center>[[Image:News.jpg]]</center>
*24 [[September 2011|September]]: A drawing of Sonichu is published in thousands of newspapers thanks to Slylock Fox.
*12 [[September 2011|September]]: [[Bob]]'s funeral is held at Monticello Memorial Gardens in Charlottesville at 10 a.m.
*6 [[September 2011|September]]: [[Bob]] [http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/dailyprogress/obituary.aspx?n=robert-franklin-chandler&pid=153539600 dies] at Martha Jefferson Hospital ICU, surrounded by family and friends.
*30 [[August 2011|August]]: Chris releases [[Asperchu|Alec Benson Leary's]] bio and picture in [[Christopher Paul Whitney reveal|a video]].
*29 [[August 2011|August]]: [[Response to ADF|Chris responds to ADF.]]
*28 [[August 2011|August]]: [[Victory Rockout]] is uploaded by a third party.

<noinclude>{{clear}}{{Usage|1= This template sits in a place of pride on the CWCki [[Main Page]]. It is a list of recent Chris-related activity, namely new content. To prevent the list becoming too long, older entries should be removed as newer ones are added - with no more than 6 or 7 entries being displayed. To add new update to the list, simply edit this template and place a brief description of what happened at the top of bulleted list. Entries should also be documented on the [[{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}} {{CURRENTYEAR}}|current month article]].}}[[Category:Front page templates]]</noinclude>

Template:Da update

2011-09-11T06:05:05Z

Griffintown:

<center>[[Image:News.jpg]]</center>
*6 [[September 2011|September]]: [[Bob]] dies at Martha Jefferson Hospital ICU, surrounded by family and friends.
*30 [[August 2011|August]]: Chris release [[Asperchu|Alec Benson Leary's]] bio and picture in [[Christopher Paul Whitney reveal|a video]].
*29 [[August 2011|August]]: [[Response to ADF|Chris responds to ADF.]]
*28 [[August 2011|August]]: [[Victory Rockout]] is uploaded by a third party.
* 23 [[August 2011|August]]: Chris uploads [[Re-Calling Ahuvia|three]] [[Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David|new]] [[Gratitude for a good person in N.C.|videos]]: two calling out [[Jack Thaddeus]] (again) and [[BlueSpike]], and one thanking a ''Sonichu'' fan for sending him a free laptop.
* 20 [[August 2011|August]]: Chris uploads a video singing about [[Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"|wristwatches]] dedicated to [[Thorg]].

<noinclude>{{clear}}{{Usage|1= This template sits in a place of pride on the CWCki [[Main Page]]. It is a list of recent Chris-related activity, namely new content. To prevent the list becoming too long, older entries should be removed as newer ones are added - with no more than 6 or 7 entries being displayed. To add new update to the list, simply edit this template and place a brief description of what happened at the top of bulleted list. Entries should also be documented on the [[{{CURRENTMONTHNAME}} {{CURRENTYEAR}}|current month article]].}}[[Category:Front page templates]]</noinclude>

Moon-Pals

2011-09-08T12:44:44Z

Griffintown:

{{Quote|I have read Moon-Pals, and I feel that it is more like Moon-Dorks the way Sean draws and Portrays their Events so Grotesquely.|Chris<ref>[[Common_Questions#26_January_2010]]</ref>}}
'''''Moon-Pals''''' is a ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' [[parody]] by [[Sean August Watley]] which provoked enormous amounts of [[Chris and anger|rage]] in Chris.

==Plot==

''Moon-Pals'' follows on from Chris's ambition of firing all [[tobacky]] to [[the Moon]], [[Metal Sonichu]]'s banishment to the Moon in [[Sonichu 1|''Sonichu'' #1]], and [[Silvana Rosechu]]'s being raised on the Moon by [[Count Graduon]] in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]]. From this, Sean envisaged the wild, drug-fuelled adventures of them and several other fan-favorite characters ([[Allison Amber]], [[Yawning Squirtle]], [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|Crystal Weston Chandler]], [[Boulder-Dropping Whale]], [[Kel]] and [[Bill the Scientist]]).

==Chris's reaction==
[[File:SAW.PNG|thumb|You sure do, Sean!]]
Even mentioning ''Moon-Pals'' in a [[Mailbag]] was enough to drive Chris crazy.
{{Quote|To [[Sean]]: Your comic strips are only an extension to WHAT YOU THINK are characters who are Underappreciated, when they are not, and I have plans for them in future tales. Firstly, [[Metal Sonichu|METAL SONICHU]] is NOT a secondary character; HE will be making his return as a MAJOR VILLIAN after Book 11 Possessed by the soul of Count Graduon.[[Bill the Scientist|Bill]] is [[Simonla#Death|still working within Giovanni's Laboratory]], I am working on a plan on including him in a future episode around Blake. The [[Boulder Dropping Whale|WAILORD]] who dropped the rock onto the mother Swampert and the [[Yawning Squirtle|Squirtle who Yawned]] are ONLY Individual characters who I originally had NO plans on putting into future stories, so ASSUME that the two were BOTH caught by Pok'emon Trainers in Pok'e Balls and now the two are fighting with their trainers in Pok'emon Battles.|Chris<ref>[[CWC Blog]]</ref>}}
{{Quote|you do not have MY POWER of being the Original Artist, Creator and Director, so ALL OF WHAT YOU DO IS PURE FICTION to MY FACT.|Chris<ref>[[Mailbag 44]]</ref>}}
{{Quote|Your "Strips" are Parodic and NOT cannon whatsoever to my, and The Original, Sonichu Pages. So you can go do your own drugs and burn your own strips to smoke with, you DOPE.|Chris<ref>[[Mailbag 54]]</ref>}}
{{Quote|Sonichu is original. Moon-Pals is a ripoff. It's incredibly obvious and you must be Slow-In-The-Mind for not seeing it.
|Chris<ref>[[Mailbag 57]]</ref>}}
[[File:Moida.PNG|thumb|250px|Chris is now officially insane.]]
Chris's rage culminated in the trial of the Asperpedia Four in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], in which [[Mao]], Sean, [[Alec]] and [[Evan]] were sentenced to death. Sean was hung from the ceiling by his wrists and shot dead by three of the characters he had so slanderously parodied: [[Kel]], [[Bill the Scientist]] and [[Allison Amber]].

In [[Book10Replacement|the revised edition]], the Four are exiled to the Amish community, where Sean becomes "the village idiot."
{{-}}
==References==
<references/>

[[Category:Not TRUE and ORIGINAL]]
[[Category:Asperchu Saga]]

User:BlackRaven117

2011-09-07T15:18:28Z

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Christopher Paul Whitney reveal

2011-08-30T22:04:21Z

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Christopher Paul Whitney reveal

2011-08-30T20:44:47Z

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Christopher Paul Whitney reveal

2011-08-30T20:44:01Z

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Christopher Paul Whitney reveal

2011-08-30T20:39:48Z

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Christopher Paul Whitney reveal

2011-08-30T20:38:19Z

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Template:ListOfVideos/Aug-Dec2011

2011-08-30T20:37:02Z

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==August 2011==

*'''[[Calling Out "Tito" - Don]]''' ''06 [[August 2011]]'' (5:22) {{Comics}} {{Rumors}} {{Website}} {{Trollsicon}} {{Reason}} {{Smug}} {{Surfshack Tito}} {{RedBlackTrim}} Chris returns to the internet, calling out trolls following an 8 month hiatus from YouTube. First on his list is [[Surfshack Tito]].

*'''[[Calling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]''' ''06 [[August 2011]]'' (3:43) {{Website}} {{Trollsicon}} {{Reason}} {{Smug}} {{RedBlackTrim}} Next on the hit list is Thorg.

*'''[[Deadline for Don "Tito" and Jeremy "Thorg"]]''' ''06 [[August 2011]]'' (1:05) {{Website}} {{Trollsicon}} {{Reason}} {{Smug}} {{RedBlackTrim}} Chris finishes up with a hatrick video, where he sets a deadline for his demands.

*'''[[Calling Out "Alec Benson Leary" - Christopher]]''' ''09 [[August 2011]]'' (5:28) {{Website}} {{Trollsicon}} {{Reason}} {{Smug}} {{Asperchu}} {{Tomgirl}} {{Green tomgirl}} {{Redbra}} Chris exposes [[Asperchu|Alec Benson Leary]], [[The GAMe PLACe]] and adjusts his demands towards the trolls.

*'''[[It's not that cold]]''' ''09 [[August 2011]]'' (1:19) {{Crazy}} {{Comedy}} {{Tomgirl}}{{Redbra}} Chris steps outside and re-enacts a scene from The Silence of the Lambs while dressed as a [[Tomgirl Pictures|Tomgirl]].

*'''[[Re: Don, and ReCalling Out "Thorg" - Jeremy]]''' ''10 [[August 2011]]'' (6:15) {{Website}} {{Trollsicon}} {{Reason}} {{Smug}} {{Surfshack Tito}} {{Tomgirl}} {{Green tomgirl}} {{Redbra}} Chris answers to Tito and keeps on harassing Thorg.

*'''[[Correction of EX relationship status]]''' ''10 [[August 2011]]'' (2:42) {{Galpals}} {{Trollsicon}} {{Reason}} {{Smug}} {{Tomgirl}} {{Green tomgirl}} {{Redbra}} Chris talks about his previous relationship with The [[Wallflower]].

*'''[[Exposed - Jeremy Slonwhite of Vancouver, BC Canada]]''' ''12 [[August 2011]]'' (3:03) {{Trollsicon}} {{Smug}} {{Tomgirl}} {{Redbra}} Chris exposes Thorg and leaks details from his personal life.

*'''[[Kaka Makeup Basics]]''' ''16 [[August 2011]]'' (6:14) {{Homos}} {{Tomgirl}} {{Blue tomgirl}} Chris talks about basic makeup techniques.

*'''[[Calling Out Jack Thaddius - Ahuviya]]''' ''16 [[August 2011]]'' (6:27) {{Website}} {{Trollsicon}} {{Reason}} {{Smug}} {{Clyde}} {{Tomgirl}} {{Blue tomgirl}} {{Redbra}} Chris talks about Jack Thaddius and exposes a new troll called Ahuviya.

*'''[[Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"]]''' ''20 [[August 2011]]'' (1:08) {{Music}} {{Crazy}} {{Tomgirl}} Chris sings a song about wristwatches while showing watches and pictures of them.

*'''[[Re-Calling Ahuvia]]''' ''23 [[August 2011]]'' (2:48) {{Website}} {{Trollsicon}} {{Homos}} {{Reason}} {{Smug}} {{Clyde}} {{Tomgirl}} Mix 107.5 Shirt Chris talks his mind regarding Ahuvia's political views and his transsexualism.

*'''[[Calling Out "Julaaaay" - David]]''' ''23 [[August 2011]]'' (3:13) {{Website}} {{Trollsicon}} {{Reason}} {{Smug}} {{Clyde}} {{Tomgirl}} Mix 107.5 Shirt Chris reveal everything he knows about Blue Spike and yells "JULAY" a lot.

*'''[[Gratitude for a good person in N.C.]]''' ''23 [[August 2011]]'' (1:08) {{Website}} {{Trollsicon}} {{Reason}} {{Tomgirl}} Mix 107.5 Shirt Chris thanks an anonymous fan who sent him a used laptop.

*'''[[Victory Rockout]]''' ''28 [[August 2011]]'' (2:46) {{Trollsicon}} {{Crazy}} {{Smug}} {{Tomgirl}} Chris sings his victory over the trolls.

*'''[[Response to ADF]]''' ''29 [[August 2011]]'' (6:17) {{Homos}} {{Tragedy}} {{Reason}} {{Clyde}} {{Tomgirl}} Chris answers to the videos made by Ahuvia.

*'''[[Christopher Paul Whitney reveal]]''' ''30 [[August 2011]]'' (4:52) {{Trollsicon}} {{Smug}} {{Asperchu}} {{Tomgirl}} Chris releases all the info he got on [[Asperchu|Alec Benson Leary]] and eats a microwaved pizza.

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