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List of Sonichu characters

2017-09-22T15:44:10Z

Heather Dalley Wallflower Confirmed:

The following is a '''list of ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' characters''', in order of appearance.

<div style="position:fixed; bottom:0; right:0">[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|right|JULAY!]]</div>

==[[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]]==
===Christian Weston Chandler===
{{main|Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)|Chris-Chan Sonichu|Collosal Chan|Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan}}

[[File:ColossalChrisChanVSMaryLeeWalsh.jpg|thumb|The heroic Christian Weston Chandler!]]

Chris-chan's alternate self and [[Wikipedia:Mary Sue|Mary Sue]], who, believe it or not, is meant to be the hero. In the comic, Chris is portrayed as much thinner than his corpulent IRL counterpart (except in earlier episodes). Comic Chris is also even ''more'' psychotic than Real Chris, having [[4-cent garbage.com|murdered hundreds of people]] in a [[Twin Falling Towers|terrorist]] attack, permanently crippled [[Liquid Chris|several]] [[Mary Lee Walsh|others]], [[Gun Comic|blown out people's kneecaps with a handgun]] after they've surrendered, [[Sonichu 0|destroyed]] the home life of a [[Jerkhief|man]] who was simply doing his job, carried out a mini-Holocaust on [[homos]]exuals, and had four men arrested, tried in an openly biased court, and personally executed in brutal and inhumane ways. For making a [[Asperchu|parody webcomic]]. And all with a gleeful smile on his face. His medallion allows him to don a [[Chris-Chan Sonichu|fursuit]] when he shouts the phrase ''Electric Hedgehog Power!'', and he can access his [[Collosal Chan|Collosal]] form with the use of the seven [[Sonichu Balls]].

Christian first appeared right on the front cover of [[Issue 0]], ordering Sonichu around. He cameoed throughout the rest of the comics, and took over as the main character in [[Issue 2]], which portrayed him as a descendant of the [[Cherokian Clan]] and fulfiller of the [[Anchuent Prophecy]]. Chris has since made himself and his [[love quest]] the [[Chris and his ego|center of attention]] and main focus of the comic in every issue (with a [[Sonichu 8|few exceptions]]).

===Sonichu===
{{main|Sonichu (character)|Ultra Sonichu}}

[[File:I am not Gay.jpg|thumb|left|'I am [[gay|STRAIGHT!]]']]
Christian's "original" character. Sonichu is a recolor who is an unholy fusion of [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] and [[Pokémon|a Pikachu]]. In earlier episodes he was the main protagonist of the comics. That is, until Chris took the spotlight. By [[Sonichu 2|''Sonichu'' #2]], Christian had taken over as the main character, and by [[Sonichu 3|''Sonichu'' #3]], Chris had added [[Chaotic Combo|a new batch of recolors]] who took over from Sonichu as the supporting cast. Consequently, Sonichu didn't have a central role again until [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], where he returned to his original purpose as a Sue for Chris. He continued this trend through the following issue. However, he did remain in the spotlight in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], despite Chris's return, as he transformed into [[Ultra Sonichu]] and helped Chris in his killing spree.

===Rosechu===
{{main|Rosechu|The Incredible Lioness}}

[[Sonichu]]'s worthless, 0-dimensional girlfriend. She enjoys flowers, shopping, and getting kidnapped on a regular basis. She is completely incompetent and constantly relies on Sonichu to do even the most menial of tasks for her. Rosechu almost never walks or runs in public, she is always carried around by Sonichu. She also is ridiculously horny. [[Women's rights|This is Chris's idea of how women behave]], likely adapted from TV comedies or anime. She is the one of the few main characters to do almost nothing for the entire series, though she did once face rape [[Jason Kendrick Howell]].

===Sonic the Hedgehog===
{{main|Sonic the Hedgehog}}

[[Sega]] mascot and a major example of copyright infringement in the comic. He makes a few appearances in the comic, most notably in the first issue, as he's partly responsible for Sonichu's existence, as described below. He also shows up to help Sonichu again in [[Sonichu 1|''Sonichu'' #1]], after Rosechu gets kidnapped. [[Women's rights|Again]].

Sonic also appears on the front cover of [[Sonichu 11|''Sonichu'' #11]], and is thought to be returning for the '10 year anniversary.'

===Perfect Chaos Monster===
[[Image:Perfect Chaos.jpg|thumb|right|Perfect Chaos as he appears in ''Sonic X'' vs Perfect Chaos as he appears in ''Sonichu''. Kinda lost his luster, huh?]]

'''Perfect Chaos''', or [[CWC-isms|"Perfect Chaos Monster"]] as Chris calls him, is the final form of Chaos, a villain introduced in the [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] game ''[[Wikipedia:Sonic Adventure|Sonic Adventure]]''. Composed of a liquid substance, Chaos assumes multiple shapes as it acquires the seven Chaos Emeralds, absorbing their negative energy to increase its power. Upon obtaining all seven, Chaos becomes Perfect Chaos, a serpentine creature of massive size, and proceeds to destroy the city of [[Station Square]]. Sonic defeats Perfect Chaos by utilizing the ''positive'' energy of the Chaos Emeralds, which transforms him into Super Sonic.

This battle was adapted by Chris to provide the background for the origin of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] in the [[Sonichu 0|premiere issue]] of his [[Sonichu (comic)|new comic book series]]. The ''Sonichu'' series begins with a male [[Pikachu]] wandering into Station Square in the middle of a fight between Super Sonic and Perfect Chaos, whom Chris identifies as the "Perfect Chaos Monster". During the fight, Sonic accidentally collides with the Pikachu, somehow triggering an [[Rainbow|unexplained phenomenon]] which imparts Sonic's appearance and powers upon the Pikachu. The new Pikachu/Sonic hybrid awakens to find Sonic has still not defeated Perfect Chaos, and rushes to his aid. Using his new-found powers, he defeats the monster, and the onlookers, who mistake him for Sonic's super form, credit Sonic for the victory (retconning the ''Sonic Adventure'' game so that Sonic is [[Chris and his ego|little more than an assistant to Chris's original character]]). Contemplating his new form, the mutated Pikachu adopts the name "Sonichu", and returns to the wild. After that, Perfect Chaos is never mentioned again in the pages of ''Sonichu''.

===Trainer Kel===
{{main|Kel}}

[[File:KelHallOfFame.jpg|thumb|left|Wait, when did Kel ever see Rosechu again?]]
Female Pokémon trainer who owned the Raichu which transformed into [[Rosechu]]. Continued to take care of Rosechu until [[Sonichu]] took over as her new pimp. She then disappeared for a long time, but when [[Sean August Watley]] later used Trainer Kel as a central character in his own comic, Moon-Pals, Christian became [[Death threats|very upset]]. When Sean was executed in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], Chris bought back Kel as his executioner, where she got her revenge on Sean for him DARING to give her a personality and a starring role.

Most of Kel's backstory and what little personality she apparently had came through the [[CWCipedia]] article on Sonichu. According to this article, by some strange and nonsensical twist of fate, she fell madly in love with [[Naitsirhc]] at some point. This same article also claimed however, that she was kind, sweet, innocent and caring.<ref>[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Sonichu]</ref> This in spite of the fact that she shot a man to death at point-blank range. Given the contradictions, it is safe to assume that this article is non-canon.

===David the Dragonite/Daisy the Dragonite===
{{main|Pokémon}}

A [[Wikipedia:Dragonite|Dragonite]] Kel also owned. The considerate Pokémon trainer offered his [[Duck|sexual services]] to [[Rosechu]] when the latter was [[Masturbating and squirtin'|in heat]], noting that he's "[[Honest|loyal]]". Rosechu refused, stating that David is "[[Obesity|just too big]]" even for her loose, gaping [[China]], and suggesting Kel have sex with him herself. Kel enigmatically answers that "she can't say she didn't try". Did they or didn't they? History will [[Chris and writing#Kudzu plot|never know]].

Strangely enough, David may have been [[retcon]]ned into "Daisy the Dragonite", as indicated by a listing of Kel's Pokémon on [[CWCipedia]]. David, who appeared in [[Issue 0]] (Episodes 2 and 3), is not mentioned on the list, though Daisy is and is the only Dragonite on the list. It would not be out of the question to think that Chris simply forgot about David's importance to the canon and retconned him into a girl, especially probable due to the fact that both names begin with the same letter and Chris couldn't really name a girl "Davidina", plus the fact that he has created [[Simonla|gender-benders]] before. This would indicate that Kel, in fact, offered "Daisy" to Rosechu for a [[lesbian]] relationship, which in turn calls into question the sexuality of Rosechu, Kel, and the Dragonite, and makes several aspects of the comic a great deal more confusing.

===Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc===
{{main|Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc}}
[[File:082-ReldnahcNotsewNaitsirhc.jpg|thumb|100px|You can tell he's gay because he is shirtless. Straight men wear [[Muscle bra|bras]]!]]

Originally known as Naitsirhc Giovanni, he was Christian's long lost twin brother, and was found and adopted by the [[Pokémon]] villain [[Giovanni]], and raised as a member of Team Rocket. When [[Chris]] fell into the [[Dark Mirror Hole]], his [[Medallion]] also entered the darkness, awakening a dormant evil within Naitsirhc, and transforming him into an evil(er) version of Chris. Renaming himself Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc, the new anti-Chris dedicated himself to world conquest, and the destruction of his "[[gay|straight]]" twin.

Like Chris, Reldnahc has his own Sonichu Medallion, patterned after [[Black Sonichu]], which he uses to transform into his fursona of Reldnahc Ha-Taque. In [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], Christian [[Rape|pins him down]] and forcibly injects him with the Gay Vaccine from the future, which destroys his medallion, makes him lose his powers and turns him into a "good guy". Because as we all know, [[Chris and reality|homosexuality makes you evil]]. He was then sent to [[Kel]].

===Zapdos===
{{main|Pokémon}}

An electric type Pokémon and one of the three legendary birds. Zapdos was used by [[Naitsirhc]] to capture [[Rosechu]] and battle [[Sonichu]] in CWCville Mall. Although Sonichu was victorious, Naitsirhc obtained a sample of Sonichu's [[Semen|DNA]], which he would later use in the creation of Black Sonichu.

===Jerkhief===
{{main|Jerkhief}}

[[Image:MyWoodenBadgeWasDelicious.jpg|thumb|left|Chris did once explain what this line meant. It made no more sense afterward than before.]]
Leader of the [[Jerkops]]. The Jerkhief is a massive [[African American]] man in a brown police uniform. Known for his beloved catchphrases such as "My wooden badge was delicious!" and "MAH SOUL HURTS!"

He attempts to arrest Chris for soliciting in the [[CWCville]] Mall, but is defeated by Christian's use of his [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]] form. Jerkhief pulls a gun on the attacking furmonster, but Christian hits him with a [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]], causing him to lose his wife, children and home, and making the poor man break down in tears. Another victory for the forces of good!

===Jerkops===
{{main|Jerkops}}
Villainous foot-soldiers of [[Mary Lee Walsh]], the Jerkops are based upon various police officers and security guards Chris has encountered during his [[Love Quest]]. They are supposedly brainwashed [[slow-in-the-minds]] and College students. In spite of this, Christian has [[Chris and death|no qualms in killing them]], and doesn't even mention the possibility of curing them until way later in the series. It has also been suggested that the Jerkops leaders (aside from Mary and [[Count Graduon]]) were under similar influence, which makes Christian's cruelty to Jerkhief even worse.

===Metonic===
{{main|Metonic}}

Evolved form of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]]. Appears only in a Classic Sonichu strip set in 2029.

===Vamprosa===
{{main|Vamprosa}}

Evolved form of [[Rosechu]]. Appears only in a Classic Sonichu strip set in 2029.

===Barbara Chandler===
{{main|Barbara Chandler}}

[[File:Bc.PNG]]

Chris's mother, and Sonichu's grandmother. Or something. The two rescued Barbara from [[Naitsirhc]] in one of the Classic Sonichu strips reprinted in [[Sonichu 0|''Sonichu'' #0]].

==[[Sonichu 1|''Sonichu'' #1]]==
===Giovanni===
{{main|Giovanni}}
[[File:SchuGioRetard.jpg|thumb|right|The insidious Giovanni]]
The leader of Team Rocket and villain of the first generation [[Pokémon]] games, Giovanni is determined to capture [[Sonichu]] at any cost. He teamed up with Doctor Robotnik to devise the perfect trap for Sonichu. Their plot was foiled, however, as Sonichu unexpectedly got help in dealing with the kidnappers, rather than going in alone like a retard, as they expected him to do. However, he only got help from [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] because he bumped into him on his way to the base. So Sonichu is still retarded, just lucky.

Later on, Giovanni seems to have reevaluated his goals, and now seeks to take over [[CWCville]] and kill Christian, as he joined forces with the [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens]] and helped them out during their attack on the city in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]]. Surprisingly, he seemed to want his son Reldnahc to rule the city, rather than wanting it for himself. This shows that at least Giovanni thinks of others sometimes rather than himself, which is more than can be said for our heroes.

===Dr. Ivo "Eggman" Robotnik===
{{main|Doctor Robotnik}}

[[File:Robotnik.jpg|thumb|left|Even Eggman was never this flamboyant.]]
Recurring villain of the [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] games. A mad genius with an IQ of 300, 'Dr. Eggman', as he is known, has tried to conquer the world multiple times, in an effort to build his own nation of robotic followers; [[CWCville|Eggmanland]]. In ''Sonichu'', however, he shows up to help Giovanni devise a trap for Sonichu and later helps to try and take over CWCville with the PVCC. Why he would ever bother with trivial things such as catching Pokémon, or why he has any kind of grudge against [[Chris and his ego|Chris of all people]] is a mystery that not even [[GodJesus]] could solve.

Also of note is that in the games, Eggman has a fleet of thousands of battleships, billions of robots (Including elite androids based on [[Shadow the Hedgehog]] and the nigh unstoppable E-Series robots), countless personal mechs, and of course Metal Sonic. Not only this, but he also has access to multiple doomsday weapons, not least of all Space Colony ARK and a huge satellite, (As seen in ''Sonic Unleashed'') that could blow the fucking planet into pieces. Despite having this MASSIVE load of firepower, he has used NONE of it in his battle again Chris. Not even a single Badnik.

===Team Rocket===
Team Rocket is the villainous organization that captures [[Pokémon]] (from the series of the same name). But somehow the company has either fallen on hard times because of the global recession or made a fucking stupid business decision as they set up a new headquarters in [[CWCville]].

Team Rocket is run by [[Giovanni]] and his retarded homosexual son, [[Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc]].

They are also responsible for the creation of [[Blake]].

=== Dr. Bill Schwartz (Bill the Scientist) ===
[[File:Bill1.png|thumb|<s>Bill Nye the Science Guy</s> Dr. Bill Schwartz, the Scientist.]]
One of the most popular characters in Sonichu lore (and totally not a [[Wikipedia:Bill Nye the Science Guy|ripoff]]), Bill Schwartz, PhD, was a genetics researcher for [[Team Rocket]] during the organization's brief alliance with [[Robotnik|Ivo Robotnik]]. It was Bill's duty to prepare [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu's]] DNA for the cloning machine, but he inadvertently spilled cherry cola into the sample, mutating the chromosomes of [[Blake|the clone]] until it took on a black color.

It was for quite some time canon, that Bill was getting high somewhere on [[the Moon]] together with Chris's other forgotten Sonichu characters, such as the [[Boulder-Dropping Whale]], [[Metal Sonichu]], and [[Yawning Squirtle]], which ended up being the premise for the troll comic, [[Moon-Pals]]. Chris, probably angry about the comic portraying Bill as a stoner, declared this depiction of him invalid on [[Twitter]], saying Bill was still in employ of Giovanni, and would be returning in comic. Bill later appears in [[Sonichu 10]], stating that he [[Chris and English|stopped working for Giovanny to save lives, and that he hats these bad days]]. Bill later appears, along with [[Kel]] and [[Allison Amber]], to execute Sean for his tenuously defined crimes against CWCville.

Bill makes his grand return in the new pages of [[Sonichu 11]] drawn in [[2015]], where he witnesses the body of [[Simonla Rosechu]] come back to life via the power of ''[[Wikipedia:Deus Ex Machina|deus ex machina]]''.

===Black Sonichu/Blachu/Blake===
{{main|Blake}}
[[File:254-BlachuPose.jpg|thumb|left|Doesn't he remind you of [[Shadow the Hedgehog|someone]]?]]

Also known as "Blachu" and "Blake", Black Sonichu was cloned from samples of Sonichu's [[semen|DNA]], which Naitsirhc obtained in [[fapcup|battle]]. Mutated slightly from an accidental cherry cola contamination in the laboratory, the clone grew to have insidious black and red fur, in stark contrast to Sonichu's heroic urine-and-feces color scheme. Initially, Black Sonichu started out as a lackey for [[Giovanni]], and then later Reldnahc, before finally becoming a watered-down good guy with an attitude when he fell in love with [[Bubbles]]. Black Sonichu was last seen recuperating from his traumatic [[rape]] at the hands of a [[Silvana Rosechu|trannie]].

He also has his own superform, in the same vein as [[Ultra Sonichu]], named [[Wall of Originals|Silver Blachu]]. It is never seen in the comic, though.

Although Black Sonichu was technically introduced in the following issue, he did appear in one of the Classic Sonichu strips, [[Love quest|stalking]] [[Rosechu]].

=== Metal Sonichu ===
The [[Sonichu]] rip-off of Metal Sonic, Metal Sonichu is one of the few characters that even Chris will admit is a rip-off. Despite this, he has [[Alec]]'s derivative character Metal [[Asperchu]] refer to Chris as the "original creator", either implying that Chris wanted to claim Metal Sonichu as original all along, or he wanted to [[Chris and copyright|take credit for another one of Alec's characters]]. Sadly, though, he blames the villains for it. Much like the original Metal Sonic, it is a combat robot built by [[Doctor Robotnik]] (Later retconned into [[Ren Skysoar]]) for [[Giovanni]] in the image of Sonichu, with the intention of [[Jerkops|capturing]] or [[Chris and Death|killing]] its organic counterpart.

In fitting with its role as a killing machine, it had some unique weapons and capabilities which the original Sonichu did not have- these included laser/lightning cannon-like weapons built into both of its hands/forearms, an automated targeting system built into its HUD, levitation, high speed flight and air-dashing abilities provided by the booster engine in its body, a sharpened axe blade-like tail for deadlier mid-air spin attacks, and a lightweight yet incredibly resilient armor and chassis which was capable of resisting several attacks from both Sonic and Sonichu with little apparent damage. It appears to be powered by rechargeable batteries (Or at least has them as one of its potential energy sources), as seen in its picture with Ren Skysoar showing it plugged into a wall and recharging via an extension lead on its tail. It also matches and could theoretically exceed Sonichu's [[power]] and standard abilities, although this was not seen during its initial appearance.

Metal Sonichu is defeated in [[Sonichu 1|''Sonichu'' #1]] by Sonic and Sonichu after being hit by a combined attack which hurls it into space, eventually causing it to crash into the [[Moon]]; however, the robotic clone survives this attack, as evident by the sight of its eyes glowing in the darkness and a clawed metal hand rising out of a crater, resulting in a cliffhanger.

The fans speculated that Chris probably just forgot about the robotic clone and that it would never be heard of again, but after being constantly reminded about it in the [[Mailbag]], and after Sean used Metal Sonichu for Moon-Pals, Chris suddenly declared that Metal Sonichu would be returning at some point in [[Sonichu 11|''Sonichu'' #11]] or [[Sonichu 12|''Sonichu'' #12]]. According to Chris, the deactivated Metal Sonichu would have been found on the Moon and used as a vessel for the recently-revived [[Count Graduon]] to return to Earth, and would become the new villain- mostly because he had already removed every other major villain from the comic permanently in preparation for [[Sonichu 10|an issue]] dedicated to murdering characters based on his IRL trolls, and afterwards, [[Chris and writing|left nothing for his characters to do anymore]] as a result of it. Whether or not we'll actually see Metal Sonichu pull it off remains to be seen.
{{-}}
<center><gallery>
Image:MetalSonichu.jpg|A robotic copy of a [[Sonichu (character)|copy]], and it's still the more likeable of the two.
Image:220-ACMSchu.jpg|In [[Animal Crossing]] card form.
Image:221-ACMSchuBck.jpg|Yeah...
Image:222-YuMSchu.jpg|[[Yu-Gi-Oh!]] variation.
File:Ren_metal.jpg|With [[Ren Skysoar]].
</gallery></center>

<br clear="all"/>

===Amy Rose===
{{main|Amy Rose}}
[[File:Rosechu-AmyRose1.jpg|200px|thumb|'I had no idea that the [[Metal Gear Solid|Les Enfants Terribles Project]] had gone this far!']]

[[Sonic the Hedgehog]]'s on-again off-again love interest. Amy Rose in the [[video games]] is a 12-year-old fangirl who has an obsessive crush on Sonic and often pursues him on his adventures to try and get his attention and appreciation.

That said, she at least does something in the video games, and often helps out the rest of the heroes on their quest, such as in ''Sonic Adventure'', where she singlehandedly defeated the powerful ZERO (E-100 Alpha) robot and re-united a separated family of birds, or in ''Sonic Adventure 2'', where she broke into a military base and freed a captured Sonic. In ''Sonichu'', however, all her personality is gone and she is just as vapid and useless and stereotypical as any Rosechu. She shows up for a couple of pages in [[Issue 1]] where she talks with Rosechu at CWCville Mall about meaningless bullshit. Interestingly, the page shows how much Chris ended up copying her design for Rosechu.

Chris later introduced two new pages to Sonichu #1 in [[October 2015]] revealing that both she and Sonic were simply disguises utilized by [[Silvana]]'s shapeshifting ability. Whether this becomes more integrated in other issues of the series is yet to be seen.

===Hanna===
{{main|Hanna}}

A woman who [[trolled]] Chris IRL by pretending to respond favorably to his [[Attraction Sign]]. Chris not only fell for the ruse, not only shouted "NOOOOOOOO!" in a public place when he discovered the truth, not only e-mailed her to ask her out again sometime, but also documented the entire sorry affair in his own comics.

The ''Sonichu'' version of Hanna is apparently an agent of PVCC, and the only troll in the entire comic to not be a cartoonishly evil-looking miscreant, probably due to being a woman.

==[[Sonichu 2|''Sonichu'' #2]]==

===Wes Iseli===
{{main|Wes Iseli|Wasabi Rival}}

[[File:Wes Iseli.jpg|thumb|left|In his Wes-Li Sonichu form.]]
Sarah Hammer's IRL boyfriend, whom Chris jealously demonized in his comics by casting him as the descendant of the [[Wasabi Clan]], a band of power hungry Native Americans who were enemies with the Cherokee.

When Chris fulfilled the [[Anchuent Prophecy]] by becoming [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]], Wes was visited by the spirit of the Wasabi leader, who granted him the power to become [[Wes-Li Sonichu]]. At first, Wes used his powers to attack Chris, until Sarah dumped his ass and convinced both of them to join her in defeating [[Count Graduon]]. Wes would later appear as a directionless villain, attacking Sarah Hammer's wedding in [[Sonichu 5|''Sonichu'' #5]], and attending [[Mary Lee Walsh]]'s villain conclave in [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]], as well as assisting in the attack on CWCville during [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]].

===Sarah Hammer===
{{main|Sarah Hammer|Queen of the Cherokian Clan}}
[[Image:Sonichu02-P13.jpg|thumb|Sarah as she appears in [[Sonichu 2|''Sonichu'' #2]].]]

Chris's childhood friend, whom he later selected to bear his children before he discovered she was involved with another man. Chris nonetheless depicted her as the reincarnation of the [[Queen of the Cherokian Clan]] in his comics, and bestowed upon her the power to become a super-powered furry just like himself.

As Saramah Rosechu, Sarah joined Chris-Chan Sonichu and Wes-Li Sonichu in a prophesied battled against [[Count Graduon]]. Failing to actually defeat the villain, the trio sort of split up, leaving Chris to deal with him alone. Sarah then got married to another man, rejecting Chris yet again, and she left the city of CWCville entirely. She did cameo once more, though, in [[Sonichu Special 2]], where she dressed in drag and attended the ceremony of Christian's ill-fated marriage to [[Ivy]], acting as his best man.

===Keeper of the Destiny Cave===
[[File:Keeper.PNG|thumb|Is he old or just a kid with a beard?]]
An old fart who had hung around by an old cave for centuries, waiting for Chris to come along and use his [[Medallion]] to transform into his [[Chris-Chan Sonichu|fursona]]. After revealing the [[Anchuent Prophecy]] to Chris and Sonichu, the Cave Keeper was never seen again. He's probably having a toke or two with [[Yawning Squirtle]], if he's smart.

===Mary Lee Walsh===
{{main|Mary Lee Walsh}}

[[Image:Mary-lee-Walsh.jpg|thumb|left|For some reason, Mary has become a frequent subject of pictures like this.]]

Arch-nemesis to Christian (and by extension, Sonichu), Walsh is based on the real life dean of [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]], against whom Chris has nursed a grudge for years. In the comics, Walsh is portrayed as tyrannical witch, waging a bitter and ruthless war against love itself. [[Chris and Writing|At no point is any information about her motivation for this provided by anybody]].

Mary Lee Walsh first appeared in the comics in [[Issue 2]], but a preview of her design was shown in [[Issue 0]], and she had been mentioned in both [[sub-episodes]] that had been in previous comics. In her first full appearance, she was wielding the staff of [[Count Graduon]], and directing the Golem attacking [[CWCville]]. This is thought to be her canonical first appearance as well, and it is believed that the subepisodes all take place after [[Sonichu 3|''Sonichu'' #3]], since the very first sub-episode features Chris-Chan Sonichu.

Throughout the comics, she did nothing but throw wave after wave of [[Jerkops]], [[Manajerks]] and other PVCC agents at Chris. Occasionally she'd help out herself, and sometimes she'd just kick back and let her robots handle it. She captured [[Crystal Weston Chandler]] in the Dark Mirror Hole at one point, but it had very little lasting consequence. Christian later confronted her as Hobo-Chan in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]]. There, she let Chris destroy Graduon's staff and she surrendered. Not content, Christian attacked her with two large swords. It ended with her being paralyzed for life and put in prison.

===Count Graduon===
{{main|Count Graduon}}

[[Image:Count Graduon.jpg|thumb|Count Graduon, the most [[Pickle|phallic]] villain in the ''Sonichu'' series.]]
The Evil released when the [[Anchuent Prophecy]] was fulfilled. Graduon is a centuries-old evil wizard who was trapped inside a magic wand by the [[Cherokian Clan]]. In the 21st Century, he has forged an alliance with [[Mary Lee Walsh]], and has secretly manipulated [[Silvana Rosechu]] to become his tranny rape weapon against the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon. He appeared to be destroyed after [[Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)|GodMode!Chris]] smashes his staff in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], but Chris has stated that he would bring Graduon back in a later issue, during which he would have found and possessed the deactivated Metal Sonichu on the [[Moon]], again returning to Earth as the main villain. From late-[[2015]] onwards, Chris has gradually began to place more emphasis on Graduon, creating a new design to show his true physical form, and also devising a Mii [[Super Smash Bros. Videos|that he then featured in several videos]] involving him fighting Walsh.

===Golem===
A weapon used by [[Count Graduon]] after escaping from the Destiny Cave and joining forces with Mary Lee Walsh. Upon learning that the Golem had attacked [[CWCville]], [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]],[[Wes-Li Sonichu]], and [[Saramah Rosechu]] teamed up to destroy it. Stolen from Sonic Adventure 2, where it originally appeared as a boss controlled by Eggman.

==[[Sonichu 3|''Sonichu'' #3]]==
===The Chaotic Combo===
{{main|Chaotic Combo}}

Five other Electric Hedgehog Pokémon spawned as eggs from the [[Rainbow]] that created Sonichu. Scattered throughout the region, they would eventually discover each other in common battle against Black Sonichu. They would form the central cast of ''Sonichu'' for the rest of the comic, outranking even the original Sonichu in the CWCville hierarchy.

===Wild Sonichu===
{{main|Wild Sonichu}}
[[Image:Wild parenting tips.jpg|thumb|left|Wild Sonichu, advising his one year old daughter on how best to mutilate a man's genitals.]]

The green recolor and a sort of leader to the group. Wild also partially rips off Spider-Man. He was apparently raised by a clan of weird ninja Scythers and a Venusaur. Once his father was kidnapped, he forgot all about him.

Later in life he became another member of the Great Director's private army and he served as another footsoldier in the many battles against [[Mary Lee Walsh]] and PVCC. During the middle of all this dumbfuckery, he attended a Dating Education class and got paired up with a mindless twit named [[Simonla Rosechu]]. Simonla was later killed, but fortunately for Wild, the [[Sandy Rosechu|bastard child]] which resulted from all sex he had with her [[Chris and art#Originality|looked almost exactly like Simonla in every single way]].

===Bubbles Rosechu===
{{main|Bubbles Rosechu}}
[[File:Iamnotretarded.jpg|thumb|Yeah. Just keep telling yourself that, Bubbles.]]

The sky-blue recolor and an airheaded slut. According to [[Sonichu 3|''Sonichu'' #3]], she was raised as a child by a random Swampert who happened to find her. One day, a Boulder-Dropping Whale randomly attacked her mother, and she forced herself to evolve so that she could save her. Some time later, she met the rest of the Combo when they all united under the common goal of beating up a [[Niggos|black guy]]. She does nothing for the rest of the comic besides fucking [[Blake]]. She finds a [[Sonichu Ball]] in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], if you can count that as doing something. Oh, and there was one point where she failed to tell the difference between [[Silvana|a trannie]] and her own boyfriend even when told the answer by a psychic.

Since everyone saw Bubbles as a stupid whore, she was portrayed as the idiot of the group in the webcomic [[Asperchu]]. Some time later, Christian established on her [[CWCipedia]] article that Bubbles was supposedly a very intelligent girl and had studied with the people of Atlantis. As you would expect, none of this was shown in the comics, and Bubbles still acts like a stupid whore.

===Angelica Rosechu===
{{main|Angelica}}
[[Image:271-Angelica.jpg|thumb|left|Angelica, the embodiment of the Antichrist.]]

A white recolor. Angelica Rosechu was made to be a religious type, specifically a Catholic. Her backstory explains that she was taken in by a convent of nuns, who raised her to be a devout member of the Faith and named her Angelica after her resemblance to the biblical angels - despite this, Angelica grew up to be a filthy whore and a violent mercenary of [[CWCville]]. She evolved one night in her sleep. Chris, who somehow knew exactly where she was and when she would evolve, broke into her house to give her shoes and a scrunchie, which he left on her bed for her to find when she woke up.

Despite being billed as a pacifist and a peacemanker, she later became heavily entrenched in Christian's war against [[Mary Lee Walsh]] and the [[Jerkops]], and may very well have killed several people in the battle. This is pure speculation however. What isn't speculation though, was that she did, in fact, ''personally execute'' [[Alec Benson Leary]] in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]] - after reading him the last rites of course, [[Chris and religion|which Catholic laymen are not permitted to do]]. She charitably remarked 'May God have mercy' while doing so. This may indicate that on some level she knows that what she is doing is wrong, but it's likely that she was referring to Alec, because like Chris, she also has a huge [[ego]], and genuinely believes that people should be killed for making [[parody]] webcomics. Like Bubbles, she is also a slut. She put out for Reginald Sneasel on the first date and she has been known to [[Media:AngelicainGod'sEyes.JPG|do things in church that would make Jesus himself cry.]]

===Punchy Sonichu===
{{main|Punchy Sonichu}}

[[Image:272-ACPunchy.jpg|thumb|Punchy, the Asian one.]]
The red one, Punchy is not even a recolour; he's just Knuckles the Echidna who is already red. The only difference between them is that Punchy is far more retarded and has racist looking slanty eyes.

Punchy was born in a dojo somewhere after his egg crash landed there. Immediately after hatching, he was challenged to a sparring match by the dojo owner's daughter and student, Mypoe, who [[Dragon Ball Z|ripped off his tail since it was a weakness]]. He then punched her through the roof to her presumed death. [[Excel Saga|G.D.W. Shinabe]], delighted at the murder of his daughter, decides to teach Punchy martial arts. This training was wasted on Punchy however, who just ended up using [[pokémon]] attacks for the rest of his life. Punchy later got caught up with the rest of the gang, and formed the Chaotic Combo with them. Shortly afterward, his master died under mysterious circumstances and he apparently inherited the dojo. Punchy then spent the rest of ''Sonichu'' fighting Jerkops and related enemies. He got a break from the routine in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], where he took the [[Dating Education]] courses to try and learn how best to hook up with Angelica. As it turned out, Angelica would have been easy, but due to circumstances, Punchy ended up with another whore named Layla Flaaffy. Since [[Women's rights|all women are the same in Sonichu]], Punchy just rolled with it and had sex with her anyway. He later also participated in the [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]] executions.

===Magi-Chan Sonichu===
{{main|Magi-Chan}}
[[Image:Magichan-icon.jpg|thumb|left|When you turn your back, he's going to stab you.]]

The purple recolor. Magi-Chan was born in a mysterious cave where, upon hatching, he was contacted by the Pokémon Mewtwo, who trained him with his powers. Upon evolving into Magi-Chan, he promptly let out a fart. His training complete, Mewtwo left him and Magi-Chan would go on join the Chaotic Combo. Despite his awesome powers, Wild Sonichu was chosen over Magi-Chan as leader of the Chaotic Combo. It would be Magi-Chan who would serve as the means to locate the Sonichu Balls from their locations, accidentally causing Chris to be lost in the [[Time Void]]. He would also fight Silvana from time to time as he attempted to save her from Graduon. In [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], he frees Chris from the Time Void, goes into the future to bring the cure for homosexuality back to the present, but starts suffering due to that, yammering something about a crisis only Chris could avoid, failing to find a man high off his ass and failing to stop Evan and Simonchu from killing Simonla.

=== Sonee and Rosey ===
{{main|Sonee & Rosey}}

The (irritating) baby versions of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]], who appear on the first page of [[Sonichu 3|''Sonichu'' #3]]. Technically, baby versions of Sonichu and Rosechu could never exist since they were created directly from a Pikachu and Raichu respectively, but that didn't stop Chris from creating them. They never made a canon appearance, but Chris recycled the designs for [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Children]].

===Scyther===
{{main|Pokémon}}

[[File:Scyther.jpg|thumb|200px|right|The Scyther who fathered Wild Sonichu. [[Chris and art|We think]].]]
For no obvious reason, a male Scyther assumed the role of [[Wild Sonichu]]'s father. Whether this is because it was screwing his Venusaur mother, or felt some obligation to help her raise Wild is unclear. The Scyther trained Wild in using his "Razor Leaf" attacks to cut down trees and such.

In [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], Wild told Sonichu and Rosechu of the last time he saw his adoptive father. According to Wild, his father was the leader of the "cut-sharp" clan of "Scyther and Scizor". At some point, the "Charmeleon Cult" burned down the dojo in the jungle that served as their headquarters. Wild joined his father on a mission to take [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|revenge]], but the Scyther was intercepted and captured by poachers instead. Wild cried like a bitch while the poachers loaded his dad in their van, then finally attempted to use his super powers to free him. The Scyther told him to stop, however, since he knew Wild was too much of a failure to cut through the steel frame of the van. Wild's last memory of his father was of "the passing-of-the-torch look in his eyes".

===Venusaur===
{{main|Pokémon}}
[[File:Venusaur.jpg|thumb|200px|left|She has to put up with his retardation.]]
A female Venusaur in the jungle discovered [[Wild Sonichu]]'s egg and adopted him. As Wild inexplicably has retractable tentacles in his arms, the Venusaur trained him in using them to grasp objects.

===Swampert===
{{main|Pokémon}}

A female Swampert adopted [[Bubbles Rosechu]] upon discovering her egg on the beach. Unlike Wild's parents, the Swampert doesn't seem to have taught Bubbles much of anything, and the pair spent her childhood splashing in the water like idiots. This idyllic existence was brought to an end when a Wailord dropped a giant boulder on the Swampert for no apparent reason. Unable to rescue her mother in her immature Rosey body, Bubbles evolved into her Rosechu form, and somehow used an ice beam to save the Swampert from drowning.

While Bubbles continues to live on the beach, the Swampert has not been seen since her first appearance. This would suggest that at some point, the Wailord returned to finish the job.

=== Boulder-Dropping Whale ===
{{main|Pokémon}}

[[Image:Boulder Whale.jpg|160px|thumb|left|The Boulder Dropping Whale's lone appearance in the comic.]]
As the name suggests, Boulder-Dropping Whale is a creature resembling a whale, who literally dropped a boulder. This signature attack was used against the Swampert who raised Bubbles, and would have drowned the Swampert if not for Bubbles's timely intervention. Although never named in the comic, the whale's anonymity and murderous hatred for ''Sonichu'' characters has earned him a cult following among [[trolls|fans]], who have dubbed him "Boulder-Dropping Whale", or "BDW" for short.
[[Image:Wailord.png|200px|thumb|An actual Wailord.]]
Originally identified as a common whale in the [[Audiobooks]], Chris stated in [[CWC Blog#12 January 2010|a blog in January 2010]] that it is a Wailord, a [[Pokémon]] that closely resembles a whale. This makes sense, as Chris always uses Pokémon when drawing background fauna in his comics (probably because he didn't pay attention during any of his biology classes in high school), such as the underwater scene in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]] which featured only Pokémon sea creatures, and no naturally occurring wildlife. Further, BDW's trademark attack appears to resemble "Rock Tomb", an attack available to many Pokémon in the video games, including Wailord.

Nevertheless, the name "Boulder-Dropping Whale" has stuck, and no matter what his species, he remains a [[troll|fan]] favorite.

Chris also stated in the same blog that Boulder-Dropping Whale was in fact a Wailord, that he had been captured, and was currently being forced to fight the senseless battles of some random Pokémon trainer. The fans have disregarded this statement, standing firm in their belief that Boulder Dropping Whale currently resides on the moon with his Moon-Pals '''Bill''', '''Metal Sonichu''', and '''[[Yawning Squirtle]]''', getting high as fuck.

=== Nuns ===
[[Image:Schununs.jpg|thumb|"The Lord has sent us an egg, sister. Tonight, we'll have omelets"]]
The two nuns that raised [[Angelica]], even though ''real'' nuns would've burned that abomination the moment they set eyes on it. Their appearance shows us that Chris believes the stereotype that all nuns are white, kind-hearted old ladies. Like Angelica, they reinforce religious upbringing by using the words ''bless'' and ''Lord'' frequently.

In addition to raising Angelica and teaching her how to fly, the nuns also saved the eggshell she hatched from. Chris stated in the [[videobooks]] that "they saved the eggshell for memories," which seems to shine a light on how his family justifies hoarding so much stuff. As there only appear to be two nuns in their convent, and they seem to have no problem with adopting disgusting mutant sow-people, ''and'' they seem to encourage them to masturbate in their supposedly holy dwelling, it's possible that the nuns are actually adult fetish models, and their convent is actually the studio for some sort of kinky reality show.

===G.D.W. Shinabe===
[[Image:Shinabe.jpg|thumb|left|Let it never be said Chris has no respect for [[Chris and copyright|copyright]]. He at least advertises the stuff he rips off.]]
Also referred to as "Nabe-San", Shinabe is one of Chris's many horrible ''[[Excel Saga]]'' references. The anime's director, Shinichi Watanabe, created an alter ego of himself to use as one of the characters in the series. Naming his self-insertion "Nabeshin" (a play upon his own name), Watanabe utilized him not only as a supporting cast member, but also as a way to break the fourth wall and poke fun at the production of the anime. Nabeshin would be heavily featured again in ''Puni Puni Poemy'', a follow-up project to ''Excel Saga''.

In ''Sonichu'', Chris depicts Nabeshin as Shinabe (get it?), who teaches a bizarre form of martial arts and film-editing. He adopts [[Punchy Sonichu]] and trains him to become a "strike ninja" after Punchy murders his daughter Mypoe. The initials "G.D.W." stand for ''Great Director Watanabe'', a reference to "Great Teacher Onizuka", a manga about a high school teacher, often abbreviated "GTO". The "GDW" gag was used in ''Puni Puni Poemy'', and so Chris stole the joke and clumsily incorporated it into his rehash character's name.

If Christian's "Sonichu" article on [[CWCipedia]] is to be taken as canon, then Shinabe was murdered by an ex student seeking revenge for some reason ''during the middle of Punchy giving Chris a tour of the dojo''.

=== Mypoe ===
[[Image:Schumypoe.jpg|120px|thumb|A classic example of fanservice in ''Sonichu'']]
Mypoe is a loose knockoff of Poemy, the star of ''Puni Puni Poemy'', depicted as Nabeshin's adopted daughter. Chris reversed the syllables in her name, both of them (Poemy refers to herself as "Kobayashi" in the show, a reference to her voice actor, Yumiko Kobayashi. Chris blatantly rips this off with Mypoe calling herself "Byashiko"), and appears to have changed her appearance to resemble [[Excel Saga|Excel]] instead. Despite this, Chris claims that the two characters are not related.<ref>I_Am_The_TRUE,_Original_CCWC#A_history_.284:11_to_6:01.29</ref> In ''Sonichu'', Mypoe is a female student of Shinabe who challenged [[Punchy Sonichu]] to a battle moments after he hatched from his egg. During the fight, she tore Punchy's tail off his body, claiming that it was a ''weak point'', and should be removed (a concept stolen from [[Dragon Ball Z|Dragon Ball]]). The trauma apparently caused Punchy to evolve into his Sonichu form. In retaliation, Punchy attacks Mypoe with a Sky Uppercut, which sends her right out of the dojo, through the roof. Unfazed by the apparent murder of his daughter, Shinabe adopts Punchy as his new star pupil.

Like all minor characters Mypoe is considered cool amongst the [[trolls|fans]]. She has a special place in their hearts due to being the only character that tried to put a Sonee out of its miserable existence shortly after birth.

=== Mewtwo ===
{{main|Pokémon}}

[[Image:Mewtwo.PNG|thumb|left|Mewtwo is not pleased with Chris's idiocy.]]
A powerful, reclusive Pokémon genetically engineered from the DNA of the rare Mew, Mewtwo escaped from his creators and briefly plotted to conquer the world in the first Pokémon feature film. Mewtwo's dark, brooding nature and vast psychic abilities would serve as Chris's "inspiration" for [[Magi-Chan Sonichu]], whose egg hatched in the same cave Mewtwo lived in during the movie. As if the connection weren't blatant enough, Chris established that Mewtwo served as Magi-Chan's mentor, contacting him at birth via telepathy and teaching him to use his mental powers.

Aside from his mental rapport with Mewtwo, Magi-Chan grew up completely isolated from the rest of the world. In a half-assed attempt to introduce him to civilization, Mewtwo projected memories of Jackie Chan films, other people's birthday parties, and various tourist attractions. Two weeks after Magi-Chan evolved into his Sonichu form, Mewtwo sent him out into the world, promising that they would one day meet face-to-face. As Chris has probably forgotten all about this though, much like all of the other sideplots [[Chris and his Ego|not involving him]], it'll probably never happen.

Christian has also notably claimed on the [[CWCipedia]] once that Reldnahc had a Mewtwo in his Pokémon team. Since in Pokémon lore there is only one Mewtwo, it can be assumed that this is the same one.

===Flame the Sunbird===
{{main|Flame the Sunbird}}

Shameless ripoff of Kazooie from Banjo-Kazooie who seems to be in dire need of pants. Flame is the guardian of the [[Legendary Master Sunstone]], and joined Sonichu and the Chaotic Combo in rescuing it from Black Sonichu. He would later be seen attending the Chaotic Combo's birthday party at the mall. It is emphasized that he is not a Pokémon, yet he readily uses Pokémon attacks, such as Drill Peck.

===Black Manajerk===
{{main|B-Manajerk}}

[[Image:Bmanajerk-oblivion.PNG|thumb|100px|Black Manajerk, the badass.]]
Chris's re-imagining of the McDonald's manager who interfered with his [[Love Quest]] at [[Mal-Wart]], kitted out with a suit of golden armour. The B-Manajerk, along with his partner, [[Merried Seinor Comic]], confront Chris after the [[Jerkhief]] tells them about him. When Chris refuses to leave, they attack him with [[Mecha-Jerkops]], and Chris is aided by [[Darkbind Sonichu]]. As Darkbind handles the other foes, Chris battles B-Manajerk, and defeats his cybernetic armor with the powers of his [[Medallion]]. He also later attended [[Mary Lee Walsh]]'s villain convention after Chris was sucked into the [[Time Void]].

[[Chris and race|And yes, the 'B' in B-Manajerk does stand for Black]].

===Merried Seinor Comic===
{{main|Merried Seinor Comic}}

Companion of [[B-Manajerk]], Merried Seinor Comic, also known as Kirby, is probably based on an older man who worked for the Wal-Mart which housed the McDonald's in which Chris was loitering that day. In ''Sonichu'', he is depicted as a cyborg with mechanical arms and legs. When he and B-Manajerk attack Chris, Darkbind Sonichu arrives to help, and dismantles Merried Seinor Comic with his superior swordsmanship. Their duel appears to have been a pathetic excuse for Chris to use Monty Python gags in his comic, with Merried Seinor Comic assuming the role of the Black Knight who refuses to admit defeat after losing his limbs.

===Wal-Mart Manajerk===
{{main|W-M-Manajerk}}

[[Image:W-M-Manajerk.jpg|thumb|150px|left|Truly an inspiration to us all.]]
The ruler of the [[Mal-Wart]] region, W-M-Manajerk confronts Chris shortly after B-Manajerk and [[Merried Seinor Comic]] are defeated. Like his henchmen, W-M is a cyborg, although he appears to be a head in a jar of life-sustaining fluid, affixed to an entirely robotic body. Far stronger than the other [[Manajerks]], W-M easily overpowers Chris, until he combines his [[Medallion]] with the [[Heart Torch of Fail]] to summon his "dream sibling", [[Crystal Weston Chandler (character)|Crystal Weston Chandler]]. Using their combined power, Chris and Crystal turn the tables against W-M, and send his disembodied head flying back to [[Mary Lee Walsh]], who sent him to menace Chris in the first place.

Particularly worrying was that according to dialogue, Chris and Crystal were surprised to learn he could survive in just his head form after they removed it from his body, implying that they had intended to murder the helpless man.

===Darkbind Sonichu===
{{main|Darkbind Sonichu}}

[[Image:081-Darkbind.jpg|130px|thumb|right|Dear Lord, he's even [[gay]]er than [[Magi-Chan]]!]]
Yet another Sonichu recolor, Darkbind is a rip off not only of Sonic and Pikachu, but Darkwing Duck and Link from the Legend of Zelda as well. In his first appearance, Darkbind comes to help Chris defeat the Manajerks at the Mal-Wart region, but leaves just before the [[W-M-Manajerk]] shows up to beat the shit out of Chris. Whoops.

Darkbind would later return to repel [[Mary Lee Walsh]]'s invasion of [[CWCville]] in [[Sonichu 6|''Sonichu'' #6]], and finally reveal that he has been searching for the seven [[Sonichu Balls]] to re-awaken his beloved [[Zelina Rosechu]]. He finally achieves this in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], and then starts crying.

===Mecha-Jerkops===
{{main|Mecha-Jerkops}}

Mechanical [[Jerkops]] used by the Manajerks to forcibly eject Chris from the Mal-Wart Region. The only two to appear were easily defeated by [[Darkbind Sonichu]], suggesting that they're actually far less formidable than flesh and blood Jerkops. One wonders what was the point was when actual Jerkops are far more capable and numerous.

==[[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu'' #4]]==
=== Crystal Weston Chandler ===
{{main|Crystal Weston Chandler (character)}}

Chris's imaginary sister. A virtual duplicate of Chris with the exception of being a female, she is created by the power of Chris's [[Pixelblock]] [[Heart Torch]], giving her sentience. Like Chris, she can become a Rosechu - Crystalina Rosechu - through her own medallion. She later spends half of the comic trapped away in a [[Dark Mirror Hole|mirror]] before being rescued as an afterthought. Chris makes [[Chris and Sex#Incest|numerous remarks about her beauty]].

=== Snorlax ===
{{main|Pokémon}}

A [[Snorlax]] who briefly appeared in Christian's 'Backyard Safari' [[Sub-Episode]], a documentary about [[Jerkops]] designed specifically to insult them. He comments at one point that a [[Jerkhief]] weighs [[Obesity|over 1500 pounds]] and can be identified by its [[The Creepy Stare|glassy eyes]] and wooden badge. [[Chris and hypocrisy|How ironic for Chris to be saying such things about Jerkops]].

The Snorlax appears at the bottom of the page as an illustration, since Christian had commented in a paragraph that the Jerkhief was heavier than a Snorlax.

=== ScotPalazzo ===
{{main|ScotPalazzo}}

ScotPalazzo is the [[Manajerk]] of Fa-Square, from the Sho-Mall Region. He is based on the manager who called the [[Jerkhief]] on Chris in real life, though he did not appear in ''Sonichu'' until Sub-Episode 6, where he for some reason became jealous that Chris had his own TV show; CWC's Backyard Safari. He decided once he was done watching it to order more Jerkops after Chris, since he was once again persisting to [[Love Quest|solicit sex in a public place]] and was still [[Story of my current days|resisting arrest]]. Or at least, that would be the [[Honest|truthful]] reason. In ''Sonichu'', however, it's because he hates love, since it caused his mother's murder suicide somehow. It's likely that the real ScotPalazzo's mother did no such thing, but Chris for some reason thinks that [[Trolls|anyone who dislikes him]] at all must have terrible and tragic lives, since [[Chris and his ego|only people with no life could ever possibly hate Chris]]! That said, ScotPalazzo is probably the only villain in Sonichu, at least until [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], to have any kind of motivation, so no one's complaining. ScotPalazzo also attended Mary's villain convention after Chris was lost to the [[Time Void]].

=== Turdijerk ===
{{main|Turdijerk}}

Turdijerk is the Manajerk of the [[Get-Tar]] region. He appears in Sub-Episode 7, where he tells Chris to get out of his store because he is loitering on private property again and scaring off his customers. Unlike with previous cases where he has provoked Manajerks into a fight, this time Chris just attacked them outright after they asked him to leave. Not caring for being assaulted by loitering manchildren, Turdijerk calls [[Bagget|Marcus Bagget]] to come and deal with the potentially dangerous Chris before he attacks any more of his employees. He also later attended [[Mary Lee Walsh]]'s villain convention.

=== Trebor Capman ===
{{main|Trebor Capman}}

Turdijerk's assistant and the second victim of Christian's unwarranted attack on the store manager. It can be assumed that his real name is Robert, given Chris's legendary love for [[Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc|reversing names]]. He was also present at the villain convention with his boss Turdijerk.

=== Marcus Bagget ===
{{main|Bagget}}
Yet another one of Chris's [[Sub-Episode]] characters of the week, '''Bagget''' (later ret-conned to '''Dagget''') is the leader of a group of [[Jerkop]]s in the [[Get-Tar Region]]. His efforts are supplemented by [[Crackder]] and a [[Jerkhief]]. Bagget and the Jerkops arrive shortly after Trebor Capman and Turdijerk attempt to make Chris leave a Target he had singled out as an [[Attraction Location]], but Chris refused to go. Thus, Bagget fought Chris personally using his sword, but the battle was fought to a standstill with Chris transforming into [[Chris-chan Sonichu]], forcing Bagget to call in his Jerkop squad for assistance. After the Jerkhief gave Chris a wicked carpet burn and 'hog-timed' him, Bagget ordered Crackder to take the now-restrained manchild to [[PVCC]].

Unusually, Bagget never gets any form of punishment from Chris as a result of this, and disappears from the comic, only reappearing as a cameo among the council of enemies at PVCC in [[Sonichu 7|Sonichu #7]]. It is unknown exactly what role he played in the battle between Chris and the Chaotic Combo vs. PVCC.

Ironically, the real '''Marcus Bagett''' that Bagget is based on has received multiple awards for his heroism.

=== Crackder ===
{{main|Crackder}}

{{Incomplete}}

==[[Sonichu 5|''Sonichu'' #5]]==
===William Spicer===
The husband of Sarah Hammer. Because Chris had no clue as to what William actually looked like, Chris depicted him as a Jack's Knight, a card from the ''[[Yu-Gi-Oh!]]'' card game franchise.

===Megan Schroeder (Meg-Chan)/Sailor Megtune===
{{main|Megan Schroeder|Sailor Megtune}}
Chris's second love interest. Based off of the actual Megan Schroeder, she moonlights as a Sailor Senshi, devoted to aiding Chris whenever he can't get off his own fat rear to do so. Despite having a very central role when she first appears, she is quickly erased from the series after her real-life counterpart gives Chris the boot in the aftermath of his ED discovery.

===Megagi La Skunk===
{{main|Megagi La Skunk}}
Megan's skunk companion. Starting out as a butch, tomboyish character with more personality than the rest of the Rosechus, her distinct nature rapidly corrodes as she gains a boyfriend in Bionic, devolving into a bland feminine cheerleader by Issue 9.

===Harriet, Joseph, Julia, Nick===
Couples harassed by Jerkops.

===Jamsta Sonichu===
{{main|Jamsta Sonichu}}

DJ for KCWC and one of the few Sonichus shown that weren't created by the Chaotic Rainbow. He has no obvious powers and speaks in outdated slang. Interestingly, Jamsta's the actual ORIGINAL Sonichu, yet he wasn't discovered and named until later, giving Sonichu all the credit.

===CWCVille Constable===
One of the few non-Jerkops in CWCVille.

===CADD Chef (alias Keneru-Meneth)===
{{main|CADD Chef}}

Another one of Slaweel's minions who does nothing but complain about building designs. The character is based off of Chris's Computer-Aided Drafting and Design and the South Park character Chef. Why Chris chose to combine these two concepts is known only to him.

==[[Sonichu 6|''Sonichu'' #6]]==

===Patti-Chan===
{{Main|Patti Chandler|Patti-Chan}}

Chris's beloved dog. Following her real-life death, in the comics, a combination of eating a four-leaf clover and moonbeams transformed Patti into Patti-Chan. Realizing what had happened, Chris brought his dog to CWCVille so it can live on forever. She uses her magic to protect the Mayor's office in [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], then kills Alec in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]] because "she's not a zombie."

===Allison Amber===
{{main|Allison Amber}}

Chris's mayoral secretary. Once a prominent Hollywood star, she bafflingly gave up the fame and fortune to work in the CWCVille Mayor's office. She essentially performs the entirety of the mayoral work in lieu of Chris while he traipses around murdering people and finding true love. When Chris became trapped in the Time Void, it was indicated that she had overtaken all of his duties until his return - presumably this made very little difference to Allison's schedule. In ''Sonichu'' #10, she rather harshly kills Sean for his promiscuous depiction of her in ''Moon-Pals''.

===Shadow the Hedgehog===
{{main|Shadow the Hedgehog|Christian & The Hedgehog Boys}}

The Ultimate Life Form created by Dr. Gerald Robotnik, this [[stress|angst-filled]] hedgehog is the focal point of a number of teenager-aimed Sonic games made in the mid-2000s and is the "inspiration" of Blake. Despite not appearing in the comics proper, Shadow DOES make an appearance in an ad for Christian and the Hedgehog Boys' solo album.

===Zelina Rosechu===
{{main|Zelina Rosechu}}

Darkbind Sonichu's love interest. She is put under a spell through the locked power of the Sonichu Crystals prior to the start of the series. In [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], she is awakened to much fanfare and is unsurprisingly revealed to be as unimportant and devoid of personality as all the other Rosechus.

===Clawdorf===
{{main|Clawdorf}}

Darkbind Sonichu's deadly foe. After putting Zelina into a deep sleep, he is accidentally [[Yawning Squirtle|turned into stone]] and left in a cave. He is presumed freed by Ultra Sonichu.

===Bionic the Hedgehog===
{{main|Bionic the Hedgehog}}

Chris's first creation before Sonichu came into play. Thought up of after getting smacked with a Sonichu Crystal (later altered to be a basketball), Bionic became Chris's first creation. He would go into obscurity until Naitsirhc arrived on the scene, knocking out the villain with a basketball. He would soon fall in love with Megagi and go and aid Chris in his adventures, culminating in Bionic electrocuting Alec.

==[[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]==

===Mighty the Armadillo===

Mistakenly spelled "Mighty the Arm'''or'''dillo" by Chris, Mighty is a supporting character from the [[Sonic The Hedgehog]] video games, including "Knuckles Chaotix" and "SegaSonic The Hedgehog". Due to his relative obscurity and passing resemblance to more popular Sonic characters, Mighty may be misidentified by ''Sonichu'' readers as another one of Chris's crappy "original" characters.

When Chris travels back in time to relive the moment he "created" [[Bionic the Hedgehog]], he recalls that he would often imagine Sonic characters acting out scenes in the books he read. According to Chris, he was reading a "Fear Street" novel by R.L. Stine, imagining Mighty as one of the characters, when he was struck on the head by a basketball, and at the same moment, imagined an orange version of Sonic emerging from a locker door where Mighty was standing.
<br clear="all">

===Sammy===
{{main|Sammy}}

A "fat, stupid" version of Chris utilized for the "Family Guy Skitch" featured in Episode 15. In a typical ''[[Family Guy]]'' style aside, Chris recalls a fictional memory of himself in an embarrassing situation, bearing a strong resemblance to Peter Griffin. Later, this same alternate version of Chris appears to speak with the real Chris, who identifies the character as Sammy, who merely "played" Chris in his memory. Sammy is a beloved figure to trolls, as he is ironically a far more accurate representation of Chris than the skinnier version who actually stars in the comic.
<br clear="all">

===Skelevision and Ghost Buggy===
{{main|Ghostbusters}}

Items used by the Filmation Ghostbusters in their adventures. Sammy busts through them in his "Family Guy Skitch" in his confused state.

===Kellie Andes===
{{main|Kellie Andes}}

One of Chris's old classmates and one of his old high school crushes. She appears in Episode 15, discovering Chris's nude picks and is revealed to have warned Rosechu in Episode 17. Interestingly, she is one of the few who ''doesn't'' get a retconned name change.

===Bender Bending Rodriguez===
{{main|Futurama}}

A lazy self-absorbed robot who gets his kicks off of robbing people, getting drunk and all around being lazy, especially with his friend Philip J. Fry. Doesn't ''that'' sound like someone we know. Bender is seen spiraling through the time stream as Chris, Sonichu and Magi-Chan travel on.

===Joseph Herring===
{{main|Joseph Herring}}

One of the many people affected by Slaweel's attacks, this pimply faced man, later renamed Joe Herr, is seen lamenting about the loss of his girlfriend. The character is based off of a man by the same name who actually looked pretty decent.

===Beavis and Butt-Head===
{{main|Beavis and Butt-Head}}

MTV's legendary icons for all things 1990, Beavis and Butt-Head were two idiotic teens who got their kicks through destruction, pervert antics and all around being complete and utter idiots. And America ''mostly'' loved them. They show up in Episode 16 slamming a locker door, mimicking a scene from one of their shorts.

===Janekops===
[[Image:Janekops.jpg|thumb|100px|You have the right to remain ''sexayyyyy'']]

Female [[Jerkops]]. Chris suggested the possibility of female Jerkops in [[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu'' #4]], by describing a "Hypno-gun" the Jerkops use to transform mentally retarded people into new Jerkops. From this it can be inferred that any Janekop would be a female victim of such a weapon. Breasted Jerkops would be seen standing guard at [[PVCC]] in issue #7, so these are most likely the same Janekops Chris suggested earlier.

===Jason Kendrick Howell===
{{main|Jason Kendrick Howell}}

The head of 4-cent_garbage, Jason Kendrick Howell is the bald-headed, eye-patch wearing cause of Chris's torment in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]]. Based off of the person by the same name whom Chris believes put up the Chris-Chan ED page, Jason is shown as apathetic to Sonichu's pleas before he launches a pickle at Rosechu, causing her to transform into the [[Incredible Lioness]] and face rape him. He would return in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], only to decide he was going to retire from trolling Chris because tormenting him is WRONG.

===Kathleen===
{{main|Kathleen}}

Kathleen is Jason's "woman slave", seen wearing an odd BDSM outfit and in a crawling position. She stays ever faithful by Jason's side throughout the whole thing. She is based off the woman by the same name, who was Jason's girlfriend at the time.

===Blanca===
{{main|Blanca}}

The first of many troll gal-pals to appear in the comics. Blanca was the creator of Jiggliami and was present at the interview with Jamsta. In issue 8, however, it's revealed that she went back to Kentucky to be with her boyfriend.

===Jiggliami===
{{main|Jiggliami}}

Blanca's creation, an odd fusion of Amy Rose and a Jigglypuff. She is a songstress who's seeking to become popular. She appears in [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]] with an interview with Jamsta and in a Spring Break concert in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], helping the Chaotic Combo before inexplicably disappearing forever.

===Lolisa Rosechu===
{{main|Lolisa Rosechu}}

Jamsta's assistant on his radio show. Oddly, she is also the oldest Rosechu of the bunch, but because this is Chris's comic, she is conveniently shoved aside so that Rosechu is the first, thus named after her.

===Robert Simmons V===
{{main|Robert Simmons V}}

Another troll who made his way into the comic as a major fan of the comics. In [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]], he appears at Jiggliami's interview. However, after Chris learned the truth of the man, he retconned it in his [[Videobooks]] by saying he was arrested for getting too close to Chris.

==[[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]]==

===Lovey and Thurston Howell III===
{{main|Lovey Howell|Thurston Howell III}}
[[Image:Howells.jpg|thumb|200px|The "S" in "Sonichu" stands for "Subtlety".]]

In [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]], [[Christian Weston Chandler]] sought to humiliate his arch-nemesis [[Jason Kendrick Howell]] with a scathing [[parody]] of [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]. In a feeble attempt to be coy, Chris refrained from identifying Howell in the comic right away, instead referring to him only as Jason, followed by a clever cameo appearance to hint at his last name. Since no [[anime]] or ''[[Family Guy]]'' characters are named "Howell", this forced Chris to delve into legitimate pop culture, and soon he found '''Thurston Howell III''' and '''Lovey Howell''', the elitist millionaire couple on the classic TV series ''Gilligan's Island''. Chris is probably blissfully unaware that the joke will probably sail very far over the heads of his target demographic, and he's also unaware that there are countries on GodJesus's green earth where the show hasn't aired for decades. Or ever.

Appearing outside the [[4-cent garbage.com]] building, Thurston chides Lovey for forgetting her purse, to which Lovey explains that she had grown used to neglecting it from their time stranded upon the island. Chris then challenges the reader to guess Jason's last name, a pointless exercise, as Chris had already mentioned "Jason Kendrick Howell" several times on his [[Sonichu (website)|website]], [[YouTube]] videos, and anywhere other public forum available to him in [[2008]].

===Beel===
{{main|Beel}}

The secretary at 4-cent_garbage, he is a devil-like creature with the [[homos|gayest]] pants ever. He shows up briefly in Episode 17, but is more prominently shown in Episode 21, stealing Chris's medallion, before having it teleported away, then blasted to kingdom come. He returns just in time to berate Clyde Cash and Jack Thaddeus over their trolling of Chris (comparing it to working with Adolf Hitler) before disappearing.

===4-cent_garbage.com employees===
{{main|4-cent_garbage}}

The workers of 4-cent_garbage building. Chris reappears to briefly sock one of them in the face. In Episode 21, Chris returns fully and destroys the building, killing about a hundred of the employees.

===George W. Bush===
{{main|George W. Bush}}

42nd President of the United States and son of the 40th President, George H. W. Bush, he saw his highs of popularity from the [[Twin Falling Towers|9/11 attacks]] plummet after he initiated the War in Iraq. He is depicted in the elevator gag tipping over his successor off his ladder.

===Barack Obama===
{{main|Barack Obama}}

43rd President of the United States and first [[niggo|African-American president]]. Obama is depicted in the elevator gag attempting to paint the White House black, but is stopped by Bush.

===John McCain===
{{main|John McCain}}

Obama's opponent in the 2008 elections and former US Senator. He yells at Obama for painting the White House black.

===Hilary Clinton===
{{main|Hillary Clinton}}

New York Senator, former First Lady to 41st President Bill Clinton and one of five potential candidates in the Democratic nominee for President. She's present as Obama paints the White House.

===Sarah Palin===
{{main|Sarah Palin}}

Former Alaskan governor, John McCain's running mate and all-around gullible bag of bricks. This "bulldog with lipstick" was present as Obama painted the White House.

===Simonla Rosechu===
{{main|Simonla Rosechu}}

Wild Sonichu's fuck toy, Simonla Rosechu is the unholy monstrosity created when Chris took Simonchu Sonichu, a creation by [[Evan]] (who in turned based it off of Simon the Digger of ''Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann'') and gave it breasts and china. Simonla first appears when she joins the other Rosechus in "stripping for [[Women's Rights]], introducing her friend Zapina. She's later paired up with Wild in Dating Education before aiding said Sonichu in defending CWCVille from Slaweel's attack. However, Simonla would meet her demise by a Voltorb blowing itself up, killing her ''on the toilet''.

===Zapina Rosechu===
{{main|Zapina Rosechu}}

A young (under-age) Rosechu who's friends with Simonla. She first appears trying to join some of the other Rosechus in stripping publicly for Women's Rights, but Rosechu shoots down that idea because of the "dumb" child pornography laws. She is later seen defending CWCVille from Slaweel and her minions.

===Greta Squall===
[[File:Greta.PNG|thumb|There are blind five-year-olds who can draw better human figures. With their feet.]]
News anchor for "[[Excel Saga|FQX]] News", obviously a parody of Fox News anchor Greta Van Susteren. Covered CWCville's 2008 Spring Break celebration on location, and became so overcome with the festivities that she stripped down to a swimsuit and leaped into a pool. Horribly disfigured, her face bears several scars, each shaped like the numeral "2", and her arms are swollen to abnormal size, possibly due to localized gigantism.

===Silvana Rosechu===
{{main|Silvana Rosechu}}

Another missing Rosechu, she was found on [[The Motherfucking Moon]] by Count Graduon and turned evil, giving her shapeshifting powers and a [[duck|penis]]. She appears in Episode 18, fucking Blake disguised as Bubbles before being driven off. She appears again in Episode 20, fighting Magi-Chan and appears one last time, disguising herself as a malformed Meg Griffin. According to Chris, Silvana would lose her powers and her dick when Graduon's staff was shattered and she would soon fall in love with Magi-Chan.

===Yawning Squirtle===
{{main|Yawning Squirtle}}

A Squirtle that is seen yawning and given a very stoned look. Many trolls took it that the Squirtle was actually high off of weed and ran with it. In retaliation, Chris mentioned that this Squirtle was actually an old friend of Bubbles and that it was also captured and not shot to the moon.

===Sea Pokémon===

Comprised of [[Mudkips]], [[Seadra]], [[Goldeen]], [[Staryu]], [[Corsola]], [[Octillery]], [[Mantine]], and [[Corphish]]. Note that Mudkip are found in swamps, not the ocean.

===Optimus Prime===
{{main|Optimus Prime}}

Supreme Commander of the Autobots and hero of the Transformers franchise. He is considered to be one of Chris's idols. However, he is depicted in Issue 8 as a grand hero (or a murderer, however you want to look at it), killing Decepticon spy Sarah Jackson.

===Sarah Jackson===
{{main|Sarah Jackson}}

One of Chris's sweethearts and Decepticon spy. She is given a memorial by depicting the heroic Optimus Prime running down her truck in his truck form.

===Sarah Cassandra McKenzie (aka Panda Halo)===
{{main|Sarah Cassandra McKenzie|Panda Halo}}

The third of Chris's gal-pals. She is given a shout out in Issue 8, only to be depicted dying in an a fire in Issue 9, mirroring her real-life "demise" which Chris concocted with no impetus.

==[[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]]==

===Sarah Jackaras===

Sarah Jackson's second comic persona. She is depicted as a teacher for Chris's demented Dating Education class. At the end of the episode, her sister nonchalantly announces her death before handing out test scores.

===George Philip===
A kid in Dating Education. He resembles Kenny from ''[[South Park]]''. He was matched up with Ivy, but got screwed because Ivy was holding out for Chris.

===Layla Flaaffy===
{{main|Layla Flaaffy}}

Ivy's companion, who does not even vaguely resemble a Flaaffy. She ends up hooking up with Punchy in Episode 19 and is shown one last time blasting away a bunch of Jerkops with a Thunder attack in Episode 20.

===Ivy===
{{main|Ivy}}

The last of the real-life sweethearts to show up in the ''Sonichu'' comics (excluding the specials) thus far. She ends up having a vision where God and Jesus tell her that she is to be Chris's one true love. Irrespective of this, she is strangled by elevator wire in Episode 20.

===Reginald Sneasel===
{{main|Reginald Sneasel}}

Chris's Mary Sue character that fills in for him while he is still trapped in the Time Void. He despises [[Niggo|darkies]] and attempts to break up Punchy and Layla only for Angelica to feel sorry for him and be his [[Sweetheart|girlfriend]].

===God/Jesus===
{{main|God/Jesus}}

Our Creator and our Lord and Savior. They appear in a vision to let Ivy know that she and Chris were meant to be. However, since Ivy dies in the next episode, it's hard not to imagine they were trolling the two in the process.

===Florance Fisher===
[[Image:SchuFlorence.jpg|100px|thumb|Florance Fisher]]

One of the few [[Niggos|black]] characters in ''Sonichu'' that isn't evil, although she is extremely peripheral. She is rejected by Reginald Sneasel, mirroring Chris's own refusal to date a black woman. Crudely resembles ''South Park'''s art style, and was probably traced.

===Rita Jackaras===

Sarah's sister. She replaces Sarah after offhandedly revealing she died somehow during the students' lunch break, then begins handing out test scores. Judging by her [[Speech impediment|odd speech patterns]], she may be [[slow-in-the-minds|slow-in-the-mind]].

===Other students===

Comprised of:
*Amy Testa
*Clem Jennings
*Geraldine
*Fred Shiflet
*Emily Ryan
*Unnamed computer-lab attendant
*Clyde Raymond Cwash- Scored the lowest on the dating test. Possible stab at [[Clyde Cash]], even though in real life<ref>Or at least in what Chris [[Chris and reality|believes is real life]]</ref> he not only succeeded in two tasks Chris has so far failed - [[Gal-Pals and Past Sweethearts (CWCipedia page)#Sarah Cassandra McKenzie, A.K.A. PandaHalo|getting married and having a child]] - but also achieved those goals using [[Chris and sex#Rape|extremely Chris-like methods]].

===Scoundrals [sic] as Vessels===
{{main|Scoundrals As Vessels}}

Evil PVCC Decepticons, they're mass produced and act as heavy-duty attackers. Repaint of Swindle from ''Transformers Animated''

===Samurai Pizza Bots===
{{main|Samurai Pizza Bots}}

CWCVille's main machine protectors and obvious Autobot rejects. This team is comprised of:
*[[Prower]] - Punchy's motorcycle, recolor of Samurai Prowl from ''Transformers Animated''
*[[Son-Chu]] - a depiction of Chris's real-life car with a "SONICHU" vanity plate
*[[Bumble-Lumba]] - recolor of Bumblebee from ''Transformers Animated''. Also a pizza delivery car.
*[[Excelina]] - recolor of R.C. from ''Revenge of the Fallen''.
*[[Armoraxe]] - recolor of Sound Wave from ''Transformers Animated''. Even has a guitar as a weapon.

===Blazebob Sonichu and Chloe Rosechu===
{{main|Blazebob Sonichu|Chloe Rosechu}}

Both were created by [[PandaHalo]].<ref>From the CWCipedia "Sonichu" page, under "Sonichu's Evolution" ''"Fire Stone = Blazebob Sonichu (to be Introduced soon in Episode 20 with Chloe Rosechu; both were fabricated by late Loyal Sonichu/Rosechu Fan and True Australian Gal-Pal, PandaHalo. She died in the brushfires of Australia April, 2009; she will always have a place in my heart with her singing of "Lift Up Your Eyes" from PlanetShakers)."''</ref> They are saved by Panda before her gruesome death and start bawling at her death before a firefighter tells them to move their asses.

===IBAChandler===
{{main|CChanSonichuCWC}}

The ''Sonichu'' variation of Liquid Chris. This ground-type Sonichu is easily curb-stomped by Sonichu before he can really get the chance to attack. It's said that Liquid's medallion was made out of paper.

===Cerah, Christine, and Robbie===
{{main|Sonichu and Rosechu's Children}}

The demonic spawn of Sonichu and Rosechu. Robbie is known for his screechy voice and [[speech impediment]], Christine is known for being [[Chris and his ego|self-absorbed]] and "shiny" (read: not really Sonichu's), and Cerah is known for absolutely nothing at all. All are equally abominable in the eyes of the Lord. These three simply show up at the end of the comic with only one extremely minor mention prior to then, and their births have never been shown. It is extremely likely that these three were created in response to trolls pointing out that Sonichu and Rosechu were having premarital underage sex. They feature all too heavily subsequent to their sudden introduction.

==[[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]]==

===Bugs Bunny===
[[Image:Bugsbunny.jpg|thumb|Bugs, enjoying what appears to be a joint.]]

A beloved American cartoon icon for decades, representative of the wacky World War II propaganda cartoons and the early 20th century vaudeville theater, '''Bugs Bunny''' appeared briefly in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]] to scold [[Jimmy Hill]] for his [[Parody|infringement]] upon [[Sonichu]]'s [[Chris and Copyright|copyright]]. This is a subtle reference to Mr. Hill's conviction over bootlegging Warner Bros. merchandise in Europe years earlier.

===Constables Gerald Grant and Louis Perez===
[[Image:geraldandlouie.JPG|thumb|Constables Gerald (left) and Louis, with firm friend Sonichu.]]

Two of [[CWCville]]'s policemen (true blue, not [[Jerkops]]) who show up in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]] to apprehend [[Inos]]. Despite this being their first appearance, they are shown as good friends of [[Sonichu]].

Gerald is the white officer, with a strong chin resembling Quagmire of ''[[Family Guy]]''. He takes a [[Pedofork|particular interest]] in Sonichu's son [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Children|Robbie]].

Louis is the [[Niggos|black officer]] - Chris has confirmed that his addition was affirmative action in [[Mailbag_50#And_in_closing...|Mailbag 50]]. He greets Sonichu with a hearty "MY BRO!" and a fist-bump. Chris is clearly pulling out all the stops to achieve a diverse and nuanced cast. Sonichu in turn inquires about his wife and "[[duck|little Lou]]"; they are reportedly "just chillin'".

It is worth noting that the office of Constable is no longer used in [[Virginia]], calling into question the legitimacy of their authority.

===The Asperpedia Four===
[[Image:Maoalecevansean.jpg|thumb|The Asperpedia Four on trial. (clockwise from the top: Mao, Alec, Evan, Sean)]]

The main users of the Asperpedia. They are arrested and executed by Chris and the others for their roles in the death of Simonla. The four are:

*[[Alec Benson Leary]] - the creator of Asperchu. Is attacked off screen by the pseudo Chaotic Combo and Mitch Sonichu for "giving them Asperger's and drawing them SOOOO horribly." Is electrocuted by Chris and the Chaotic Combo.
*[[Evan]] - Simonchu's creator. Is castrated and drilled to death by Sandy and Wild.
*[[Sean August Watley]] - Creator of Moon-Pals. Is shot to death by Allison, Bill the Scientist, and Kel.
*[[Asperpedia|Mao]] - Asperpedia admin. Is [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|broken]] and killed by Chris.

Chris would, in an attempt to appear like a less psychotic human being, make a new ending for Sonichu 10, wherein the four are condemned to live in a Amish community for the rest of their lives, which results in them becoming a bunch of [[slow-in-the-minds]] who spew [[random-access humor]].

===Sackboy===
{{main|Little Big Planet}}

The mascot and main character of the ''Little Big Planet'' game franchise. He appears in issue 10 to tell readers not to buy unauthorized copies of ''LBP'' for the [[Hex Box]].

===Jimmy Hill===
{{main|Jimmy Hill}}

Famed former soccer player turned commentator who was used as part of a trolling scheme against Chris. He is depicted in Issue 10 getting his teeth knocked out by Chris-Chan Sonichu's Hyper Beam before being scolded by Bugs Bunny.

===Clyde Cash===
{{main|Clyde Cash}}

Infamous troll who helped inspire many others. In actuality, Clyde's first appearance was in ''[[Sonichu Special 1]]'', capturing Ivy and trying to kill both Chris and Ivy when they escape. In issue 10, he's depicted as a panicking man as the 4-cent_garbage building began falling. Unwilling to let Chris kill him, he takes the hand of his lover, Jack Thaddeus, and leap to his death.

===Jack Thaddeus===
{{main|Jack Thaddeus}}

Person who owned the ads at the CWCkipedia and forced Chris to hump his [[PS3|Life Upgrade]]. He is depicted as another panicking man in the 4-cent_garbage building. He joins his lover, Clyde Cash, in leaping to their deaths, unwilling to let Chris have his victory.

===Meg Griffin===
{{main|Meg Griffin}}

Middle child of the fictional Griffin family, usually depicted as being ignored and ridiculed by her family and just about everyone else. In Issue 10, she was a disguise by Silvana, who appeared, told Chris how awesome he was, shared a kiss with him, then disappeared. Worst troll ever.

===Asperchu/Mitch Sonichu===
{{main|Asperchu}}

Star of Alec Benson Leary's comic of the same name. When Ultra Sonichu appears, he takes away his personality and Asperger's and transforms him into Mitch Sonichu (and Chris expected Alec to follow suit).

===Chaotic Combo (Asperchu)===
{{main|Chaotic Combo (Asperchu)}}

Formerly the Asperchu versions of Sonichu, Punchy, Bubbles, Angelica, Wild and Magi-Chan. Ultra Sonichu appears and removes their "Asperger's" (despite none of them actually having the condition) and gives them new identities of Michael Sonichu, Bobby Sonichu, Kitty Rosechu, Trisha Rosechu, Whisp Sonichu and Swift Sonichu.

===Metal Asperchu===

A robot Asperchu created to find and collect the seven [[Sonichu Balls|Chaos Pickles]]. Is destroyed by the pseudo Chaotic Combo.

===Basement Rosechus===
{{main|Basement Rosechus}}

A group of Rosechus found in Alec's basement, malnourished and injured. Many had believed that Chris portrayed them as being raped by Alec, which Chris tried furiously to deny.

===Inos===
{{main|Inos}}

A homeless man discovered by Ultra Sonichu. To his horror, Inos is discovered with a five year cold and under the influence of weed. Ultra Sonichu steals his weed away then has the police slap his wrist. He later reappears during the Christmas special to compliment [[Blake]] and wish him a Happy Kwanzaa, but Blake responds with anger and some subdued [[racism]]. Blake attempts to attack Inos, but [[Bubbles]] tells him to 'stand down'.

===Simonchu===
{{main|Simonchu}}
[[File:SimonlaSimonchuHaiti.JPG|150px|thumb|right|Simonchu (right) and [[Simonla Rosechu|his infringed counterpart]].]]
The main hero of [[Evan]]'s Simonchu comics and Wild's lover in Asperchu. He attempts to kill his evil clone Simonla, but is stopped by Magi-Chan.
{{-}}

===Toilet Exploding Voltorb===
[[Image:Toiletexplodingvoltorb.png|thumb|Simonla's killer.]]

The Pokémon that kills Simonla with Self-Destruct.

===Sandy Rosechu===
{{main|Sandy Rosechu}}

The bastard child of Wild and Simonla. She is forced to be evolved by Wild and is trained by different Pokémon just so she can ''tear Evan's genitals out''.

===Judge Slack Lewis===

The judge presiding the case of the Asperpedia Four. He has an obvious bias towards Chris and allows everything that goes on. He may or may not be a rip-off of [[wikipedia:Lewis Black|Lewis Black]], a comedian who would likely rage at Chris and the comic.

===Marvey Blaziken===

A shameless ripoff of Harvey Birdman, except with a Blaziken instead of a bird. Serves as the Prosecutor for the Asperpedia Four's trial. Marvey is clearly a personification of [[Chris and the Law|Chris's poor understanding of the American legal system]] as he is able to win the case with no evidence beyond "they drew bad comics". He also appears at the end of the comic to be Chris's mouthpiece against fans for having the AUDACITY to want semi-regular updates.

===Spiny Norman===

An actual hedgehog, Chris shoehorned in an incredibly minor reference to an early ''[[Monty Python's Flying Circus]]'' sketch on the page calling out [[Jimmy Hill]], presumably because Chris' only exposure to the British was the TV show.

==[[Sonichu 11|''Sonichu'' #11]]==
===Kevin===
{{main|Kevin the Jew}}
An unseen friend of [[Cerah Rosey]]. Since he's Jewish, Cerah bakes him as a gift a candle-shaped cookie for Hanukkah, due to the candle-related symbolism in this holiday's rituals, despite the fact that a biscuit of any shape would have been accepted for such a celebration. Cerah also makes the flavor vanilla, just in case poor Kevin had any nut/chocolate allergies. Instead of simply asking if he's allergic, she just assumes it.<ref>''[[Sonichu 11]]'', p. [:image:SchuComic11P4.jpg|4].</ref> Because Jews are sickly Melvins with many allergies, you see. He later appears for the first time in a visual role in Sonichu 11's adaptation of ''[[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas Story]]'', and heavily resembles a character from ''Peanuts''.

=="[[Sonichu Special 2]]"==

===Ching Chong===
[[Image:SchuComicSP2P4.jpg|thumb|It is said that perfect wedding days can feel like sweet blissful happy blur for everybody. Ching Chong certainly feels that way, but not in the usual sense... ''she was told about "recycling".'']]

A small [[China|Chinese]] girl that Ivy tutored in [[Chris and art|art]]. Ching Chong became mentally scarred for life due to her witnessing a video of Chris drinking his own "[[Semen|Navy]]" while innocently browsing the [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] website. Chris offered [[Chris and remorse|formal excuses]] to her in a [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009|Captain's Log video]]. In the comic she appears as the flower girl. Chris seems to be completely unaware of the stereotypes said character's name brings along.

===Other Characters===
*[[Keino]] - Ivy's dad
*[[Crass and Champ]] - Ivy's hermit crabs, who are ring bearers
*'''Canino Houndhowl''' - receptionist for wedding, a creation of [[Megan]] that Chris ripped off
*[[Metal Gear Solid|Gecko and Mantis]], a pair of reptilian bakers
*'''Lilith''' - A Meowth who is a bridesmaid
*'''Rachel''' - Ivy's best friend, the maid of honor
*CWCville Baptist Church Pastor
*An unnamed [[My Little Pony]] character - pulls the chariot that Chris and Ivy ride in
*'''[[MEOW|Spas]]''' - a feline pianist
{{clear}}

==[[Sonichu Special 4]]==
===IBAChandler===
{{main|CChanSonichuCWC}}

The real Christian Weston Chandler, though he refers to himself as [[Ian Brandon Anderson|IBAChandler]] in Solid Chris's comic world. Here, he is displayed as a knife-wielding madman who wants to cut up Kacey for... no apparent reason. Ian responds by disarming him, then blowing out his shins.

===Kacey===
{{main|Kacey}}
Girlfriend of the real Chris and damsel in distress in the comic.

===Megatron===
{{main|Megatron}}
Seeing as the comic already depicted Optimus Prime mowing down evil, it's only natural that his eternal nemesis and leader of the Decepticons Megatron strike fear into the hearts of those who do good. He aids Ian by shooting an unarmed Chris in the legs.

===Kacey's Family===
All are thankful to [[Ian Brandon Anderson]] for shooting the unarmed Real Chris in the legs. Her family is comprised of:
**[[Father Call|Matt Devoria]] - Kacey's father who looks like Guile from Street Fighter 2. (Hates Ian in real life and doesn't want them to marry.)
**Kacey's mother
**Kacey's brother
**Kacey's sister - Says Ian is a "hot man" and Liquid Chris is a "[[CChanSonichuCWC#Irony|geeky twerp]]"

==Sonichu characters not seen in the comics but otherwise mentioned by Chris==
Being an avant-garde writer with little regards to outdated conventions, Chris ignores the idea of "show don't tell" and often introduces entire plots and characters in his writings rather than in his drawings. Some of those characters include:

*A [[Pokémon#Pokémon not appearing within the comics|plethora of various Pokémon]].
*A bunch of merpeople populating the lost city of Atlantis. Virtually nothing is known about them other than that they are friends of [[Bubbles]].<ref name="Bub cwcipedia">[[CWCipedia]] on [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Bubbles_Rosechu Bubbles Rosechu]</ref>
*Terrah LeAnne Yowman, her sweetheart Tippanston Gowen, and the various unnamed students mentioned in [[The High School Story]].<ref>[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Private_Villa_of_Corrupted_Citizens#The_High_School_Story The High School Story] on the [[CWCipedia]]</ref>
*A Pokémon Professor named [[Cole]] is mentioned on the CWCipedia. He examined Sonichu and Rosechu after they transformed into their current forms, and was also responsible for teleporting Rosechu to Kel when the latter was engaging in gym battles.<ref name="Ros cpedia">[[CWCipedia]] on [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Rosechu Rosechu]</ref>
*Grace Rosewell, the Reverend at Samuel Memorial United Christian Church. Sonichu, Rosechu and the Chaotic Combo attend her service every Sunday.<ref name="Son cwcipedia">[[CWCipedia]] on [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Sonichu Sonichu]</ref>
*Fritz Richmond, a pastor at Samuel Memorial United Christian Church. Helped raise Angelica.<ref name="ang cwcipedia">[[CWCipedia]] on [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Angelica_Rosechu Angelica Rosechu]</ref>
*An ex-student of Shinabe who kills his master in revenge for an unknown slight. Punchy kills in return with a punch and buries him behind Shinabe's Dojo.<ref name="Son cwcipedia" />
*Three unnamed protectors of Parodyse Island - According to [[Megagi]]'s [[Animal Crossing]] card, she and three other unnamed individuals are the protectors of Parodyse Island.<ref>[[:File:315-ACMegagiBck.jpg]]</ref> Nothing further is known about them.
*Russel and Cynthia - In Facebook post from 21 May 2015, Chris describes how Chris-chan Sonichu's form has turned into a female one. While still being in his Chris-chan Sonichu form, Chris inseminates himself with a sample of his semen that he produced while still in his human form. Two weeks he laid two eggs, and three weeks afterwards a Sonee and Rosey hatched from them. Chris named the Sonee Russel and the Rosey Cynthia. They both respectively developed into a Sonichu and Rosechu later on, with Russel developing an interest in Britain and English culture and Cynthia developing an interest in her Cherokee roots and becoming a naturist. According to Chris they have no birth defects, not even their parent's autism.<ref>[[May 2015 Facebook posts#Meet Russel and Cynthia]]</ref>

==Notes==
<references />

{{Sonichu}}
[[Category:Lists]] [[Category:Characters]]

2001

2017-09-22T15:40:29Z

Heather Dalley Wallflower Confirmed:

[[Image:0583-CWC19-2.jpg|thumb|Chris in '''2001'''.]]
[[Image:0315-KellieAndesY2K.jpg|thumb|In '''2001''', Chris lost touch with [[Kellie Andes]].]]
[[Image:0618-BarbaraIs60-1.jpg|thumb|Cake Chris made for his mother's 60th birthday in '''2001'''. It features Sonichu...]]
[[Image:063-SonicVsSonichu.jpg|thumb|Early [[Sonichu]] art.]]

<div style="position:fixed; bottom:0; right:0">[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|right|JULAY!]]</div>

'''2001''' is the year that [[Chris]] turned 19 years old. One thing worth mentioning is that beginning from age 19 onwards, Chris has been rapidly gaining weight as photos taken from this year show Chris's growing double chin, as well as the first noticeable appearance of his [[manboobs]].

==Events of 2001==
* Summer 2001 - [[LEGO|Bionicle]] released in the U.S.

===January===
* 29 January - Chris posts the confusingly-titled "Issue #1" of [[Sonichu's News Dash]], which consists of the cheat codes for five Sonic games. He updates [[CWC's Sonichu Site!]].

===February===
* 3 February - Chris makes a new [[Sonichu]] card.
* 13 February - Chris updates [[CWC's PokéSite 2]]. He adds some images.
* 20 February - Chris creates a [[Metonic]] Pokemon card.
* 21 February - Chris creates the "_______'s Sonichu" card.
* 22 February - [[Rosey]], the offspring of a [[Rosechu]], is conceived by Chris. Chris also makes another Sonichu card, calling him "the fastest Pokemon alive."
* 24 February - Chris's 19th [[birthday]]. A picture is taken of Chris as he prepares to leave the house wearing a Manchester High sweatshirt that is somewhat small for him, a non-matching blue shirt underneath his sweatshirt, a backpack, a cheap digital watch, leather gloves and and his Ash Ketchum hat. It is assumed that he likely wore outfits like this during his first year at PVCC.

===March===
* 1 March - Chris creates the Racing Sonichu card.
* 6 March - Chris makes an Archie Comics cover for "[[Sonic The Hedgehog]] vs. Sonichu."
* 14 March - [[Vamprosa]], [[Rosechu]]'s evolution, is born.

===May===
* 28 May - Chris joins [[eBay]].

===June===
* 6 June - Chris makes a CD called "Linda Ronstadt (En [[Spanish|Espanol]])."<ref>[[:File:051-LindaRonstadtCD.jpg]]</ref>
* 19 June - Shadow the Hedgehog's first appearance, in ''Sonic Adventure 2''. He would later be ripped off as [[Blake]].

===July===
* 12 July - Chris shoots "[[The City of Cwicville Tour!]]" video for his [[DVD]].

===August===
* August - Chris enters his second year at [[PVCC]].
* August - Chris starts working at [[Wendy's]].
* Summer - Chris loses touch with his [[gal-pal]] [[Kellie Andes]].

===September===
* 4 September - [[Bob]] turns 74.
* 11 September - Chris goes shopping with [[Barbara]]. He buys a card which turns out to be a Dark Arbok, which he seems to see as a negative omen.<ref>[http://www.pokemontradingpost.com/images/Rocket/H-2_Dark_Arbok.jpg]</ref><ref>[[Jackie E-mails 29]]</ref> Also, Chris is allegedly "[[Apology for 9/11 Joke|saddened]]" by the [[terrorist]] attacks on the World Trade Center. [[Father Call|Matthew Devoria]]'s mother ([[Kacey]]'s grandmother) dies in the WTC.

===October===
* October - According to [[Chris's résumé]], this was when he stopped working at Wendy's. However, other sources say that this happened before September 11th.
* 1 October - [[Barbara]] turns 60. Chris puts [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] on her cake.
* 2 October - Chris updates [[CWC's Sonichu Site!]].

===November===
* 17 November - Chris creates the Mystery-to-Solve card.
* 29 November - Chris creates the Hooked on Sonichu card.

===December===
* 4 December - Chris founds "CWC's Vroom-A-Zoom!," his [[Hot Wheels]] website.

==References==
<references/>

{{Timeline}}

[[Category:Chronology]]

2000

2017-09-22T15:39:02Z

Heather Dalley Wallflower Confirmed:

__NOEDITSECTION__
[[Image:0481-CWC18th12.jpg|thumb|In '''2000''', [[Chris]] celebrated his 18th birthday.]]
[[Image:043-CWCsFavHitsIn.jpg|thumb|Chris in '''2000'''.]]
[[Image:0484-CWC18th15.jpg|thumb|Chicks, uncomfortable in the [[Chandler]] household on '''24 February 2000'''.]]
[[Image:411-CWCWeekP5_crop_2.jpg|thumb|'''April 2000''', the Chandlers are moving houses.]]
[[Image:197-cwcsonstecrd.jpg|thumb|In '''October 2000''', Chris launches the [[Sonichu.net|CWC Sonichu site]].]]
[[Image:094-SchuMedl.jpg|thumb|In late '''2000''', Chris created the first [[Sonichu Medallion]].]]

<div style="position:fixed; bottom:0; right:0">[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|right|JULAY!]]</div>

The year '''2000''' is the year that Chris turned 18 years old. He graduated from high school and started attending [[Piedmont Valley Community College]]. The year 2000 is iconic for the [[True and Loyal Fanbase|Sonichu fanbase]], as it was the year that he thought up [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] while making ''[[Christian's Favorite Hits!]]''. However, he didn't start making [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu comics]] until [[2004]].

==Events of 2000==
* Sometime - Chris begins taking Paxil.<ref>[[Autism papers#MEDICATIONS:]]</ref>

===January===
* 21 January - Chris requests information about [[Spanish]]-language Pokemon cards on his website, [[CWC's Pokésite 2]].
* 22 January - Mrs. Raghu, a friend from [[Richmond]], signs Chris's guestbook and says that [[Pokémon]] is sooooo cute.<ref name="Guestbook">[http://web.archive.org/web/20001021022214/http://neptune.guestworld.lycos.com/wgb/wgbview.dbm?owner=Starytime Guestbook] of [[CWC's Pokésite 2]]</ref>
* 22 January - Jaime, a "friend" of Chris's from his [[Spanish]] 2 class, signs his guestbook and says that his website is really cool, seriously.<ref name="Guestbook" />
* 26 January - A person named Scott signs Chris's guestbook and compliments his site.<ref name="Guestbook" />

===February===
[[File:KelHallOfFame.jpg|thumb|Drawn in Feb. 2000]]
* 14 February - Chris writes [[Valentines Day Hymn]], a poem, and creates a collage to go with it. He posts it on his website.
*18 February - Chris draws [[Kel]] with her Pokémon.
* 19 February - Chris and [[Barb]] prepare for his [[My big 18th party (story)|birthday party]].
* 24 February - Chris's 18th birthday. He has pepperoni pizza and [[CWC Cola|Pepsi]], along with watching ''Good Burger'', with his [[Gal-pal]]s at home. This might have been the best day of his entire life.

===March===
* 3 March - Chris updates his list of Pokemon Promo cards on his site.
* 4 March - Megan Mitchell, sister of Chris's [[gal-pal]] [[gal pal#Miranda Joyce Mitchell|Miranda Mitchell]], signs his guestbook and says that Chris is very good at drawing.<ref name="Guestbook" />
* 12 March - Chris writes [[Hotel Ricky Ricardo]], probably for [[Spanish]] class. It shows how crappy Chris's attempts at doing his homework were.
* 13 March - Chris makes another update to his Pokemon Promo card list on his site.
* 16 March - Mrs. Dunlap, one of Chris's teachers, signs his guestbook and says how nice the website looked after using [[gal pal#Miranda Joyce Mitchell|Miranda]]'s logos.<ref name="Guestbook" />
* 17 March - One of the most fateful days in Chris' history. When Chris is assigned to create his own CD cover, he finds out that copyrighted characters were prohibited from the project. As a result, he thinks up the character Sonichu, a hybrid of [[Pikachu]] and [[Sonic the Hedgehog|Sonic]], as a way to get around copyrights held by [[Sega]] and [[Nintendo]].<ref>[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Sonichu CWCipedia article on Sonichu]</ref>
* 20 March - Kelbie, Annchop and Kixfairy, very strange Pokemon, are created by Chris.

===April===
* 2 April - Chris attends [[Kellie Andes]]'s birthday party. He gives her a Sonichu sweatshirt.
* 2 April - Chris makes another update to his list of Pokemon Promo cards on his website.
* 3 April - Chris posts the American Team Rocket card list on his site.
* 4 April - Chris updates [[CWC's Pokésite 2|El PokéSite de RWC 2]].
* 7 April - Chris designs the cover for ''Christian's Favorite Hits!''.
* 13 April - Chris creates the [[Metonic]] card.
* 19 April - Chris creates the Christian's Sonichu card.
* 24 April - Chris starts making his self-documentary [[A Week With Christian Chandler]].
* 24 April - Chris's friend Jarrett from the Pokemon League signs his guestbook.<ref name="Guestbook" />
* 29 April - Chris goes to the [[Pokémon]] league at [[Books-A-Million]]. A party is held in honor of the launch of the Team Rocket Pokémon series.
* 30 April - Chris writes that the Chandler family is moving back to [[Ruckersville]]. Christian helps move boxes.

===May===
* May - Chris takes his mom to [[Seinor prom|senior prom]].
* May - Chris makes his cover for his [[A Week With Christian Chandler]] project.
* 1 May - At school, Chris prints the cover for his CD. He complains about having to ride home in a bus with some "[[slow-in-the-minds]]" in it. It's an odd day, so Chris has lunch alone.
* 2 May - Chris falls asleep during English class. Because it is an even day, Chris has lunch with his friends [[Tiffany Gowen]] and [[Sarah Bevel]].
* 3 May - At home, Chris plays videogames, sorts his Pokémon cards and browses the internet. He also visits the YMCA pool.
* 4 May - A school day; at Contemporary Living class Chris makes some pasta with Tiffany and Sarah, at Photography class Chris makes a mothers-day gift for Barb.
* 5 May - Chris goes to school in shirt and tie, because it's the day of the Senior Group Photo. Because the shoot takes so long, he is picked up from school by [[Bob]].
* 9 May - Chris creates the Christian's Christian card.
* 10 May - Chris updates [[CWC's PokéSite 2]]. He changes around the fonts a bit, and adds a text that tells visitors to bookmark and promote his site, and to leave a message in his guestbook.
* 11 May - Chris creates the [[Sonichu 6|Dark Sonichu]] card.
* 29 May - Chris announces the arrival of a new Promo Trainer card and apologizes for not having the "inspiration" to update his site lately.

===June===
* 1 June - Chris creates the Surfing Sonichu card.
* 2 June - Chris creates the Snowboarding Sonichu card.
* 9-11 June - Chris attends BrickFest 2000, an adult [[Lego]] fan convention.
* 15 June - Chris graduates from [[Manchester High School]]<ref>[[Chris's resume#Professional Education]]</ref> on [[honor roll]]. He throws a hissy-fit.<ref>[[Chris's Wikipedia profile#Graduation]]</ref><ref>DVD, graduation notes [[:Image:0566-GraduationNote1.jpg|1]] and [[:Image:0567-GraduationNote2.jpg|2]]</ref>
* June - Chris stops working as a volunteer assistant Gym Leader at [[Books-A-Million]] in Midlothian.<ref name="experience">[[Chris's resume#Experience]]</ref>
* June - Chris starts working as a volunteer Gym Leader at [[Card_games#Toys_.22.D0.AF.22_Us|Toys "Я" Us]] in Charlottesville.<ref name="experience" />
* 19 June - Chris updates [[CWC's PokéSite 2]]. He changes the fonts and removes some text. He says that he is in the process of moving and is stressed out.
* 20 June - According to A Week With Christian Chandler, Chris and his family finish moving from [[Richmond|Midlothian]] to [[Ruckersville]] on this day.

===July===
* 14 July - Chris makes a CD for his "big bro" [[Cole Smithey]]'s birthday. He makes like a DJ and does a radio show on [[KCWC]] about him.
* 16 July - Chris finishes the illustration for his CD for Cole.
* 17 July - On his site, Chris declares that his family is finally finished moving to [[Ruckersville]].
* 22 July - Chris provides information about new Pokemon Promo cards on his site.
* 26 July - "Sonichu" signs Chris's guestbook, saying that Chris's site is terrific.<ref name="Guestbook" />
* 27 July - Chris sets to work on ''Christian's Favorite Hits 2!'' He also posts a Promo Card checklist on his website.

===August===
* August - Chris begins his first year at PVCC.<ref>[[Chris's resume#Academic Education]]</ref>
* 9 August - Chris provides information about the new *Cool Porygon Promo card on his site.
* 10 August - Chris discusses Gym Heroes cards on his site.
* 16 August - Chris's friend from [[Card games|Toys R Us]], Jason, signs his guestbook, saying that he beat Chris with a Moltres stall deck and wishing him good luck at PVCC.<ref name="Guestbook" />
* 20 August - Chris makes a Yahoo! account. The username is CChandler9885.
* 28 August - Chris creates the [[CWC's Sonichu Site!]] logo.
* 29 August - Chris announces on his [[CWC's Pokésite 2|site]] that a new Sonichu website will be coming in the winter. He would later claim that this was the day the Sonichu site was "launched".
* 30 August - [[Sonichu's News Dash]] Preview issue #00 comes out.
* 31 August - Chris's friend from [[PVCC]], Nicole, signs his guestbook and says that he did a good job on the website, and she wishes him luck in anything he does.<ref name="Guestbook" />

===September===
* 4 September - [[Sonichu's News Dash]] Preview issue #01 comes out. [[Bionic the Hedgehog]] is first mentioned. He posts the [[Bionic the Hedgehog (short story)|Bionic short story]] on his site.
* 4 September - [[Bob]] turns 73.
* 7 September - Chris creates Chicachu, the female Pikachu, and Maychu, the female Raichu.
* 18 September - Chris provides a theory about the Pokémon TCG League on his site.
* 19 September - Chris updates his Christian's Sonichu card, and creates the Christian's Chicachu card and the Christian's Maychu card. He also creates the [[CWCville|Cwick City]] Gym card.
* 20 September - Chris reports on a new Promo Gym card on his site.
* 23 September - Chris makes the Christian's Weeler, Christian's Hotfinish and Christian's Strongtire cards. He also makes a TopDeck cover with Sonichu for his [[scrapbook]].
* 24 September - Chris creates the Christian's Flashbulb, Christian's Coonbulb, Christian's Bugzapp, Christian's Kelbie, Christian's Annchop and Christian's Kixfairy cards.
* 28 September - [[Sonichu's News Dash]] Preview issue #02 comes out. Chris announces that on his new Sonichu site, he will be providing Sonic reviews and previews.

===October===
* October - Chris opens CWC's Sonichu Site!.
* 1 October - [[Barb]] turns 59.
* 5 October - Chris updates his Pokemon website, and reports on new Pikachu Promo cards.
* 7 October - Chris posts a new checklist of Gym Challenge cards on his Pokemon site.
* 20 October - Chris makes another update to his Pokemon website.

===November===
* 11 November - Chris signs the guestbook of a website called Lione Productions.<ref>http://www.sonichu.com/cwcki/File:134331167038.png</ref>
* 12 November - Chris creates a CD for his gal-pal [[Kellie Andes]] for Christmas.<ref>[[:File:049-Songs4Kellie.jpg]]</ref>
* 15 November - Chris updates CWC's PokéSite 2 again. He changes the font and adds some text.
* 19 November - Unfazed by the failure that was Christian's Favorite Hits 2!, Christian makes Christian's Favorite Hits 3!

===Winter===
* Chris crafts the first [[Sonichu Medallion]] from [[CRAYOLA FUCKIN' MODEL MAGIC]].

===December===
* 5 December - On his Pokemon site, Chris reports on a [[contest]] to win a Pikachu card. He also provides information about Marril cards.
* 12 December - Chris updates CWC's Sonichu Site!
* 17 December - Chris reports on his site that Marril is a Promo card.
* 21 December - [[Sonee]], Sonichu's offspring, has a card created for him.
* 22 December - Chris publishes his last news item on CWC's Pokésite 2, regarding the new Neo Set Checklists and Deck Lists. Also, according to the [[Wall of Originals]], this was the day that Chris conceived [[Rosechu]] and the [[Zapbud]].
* 23 December - Chris creates another TopDeck magazine cover featuring his creations.

==References==
<references />

{{Timeline}}

[[Category:Chronology]]

My Little Pony

2017-09-22T15:37:58Z

Heather Dalley Wallflower Confirmed:

{{taxpayermoney}}
{{DeadLinks}}

<div style="position:fixed; bottom:0; right:0">[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|right|JULAY!]]</div>

{{quote|I recommend buying yourself a My Little Pony figure of your favorite color or whatever. Now, uh, stroking the hair of said pony is very relaxing and therapeutic, and also rubbing it against your cheek. That's... nice.|Chris' advice for young men<ref>[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]]</ref>}}

[[File:Chris_Chan_Pony.png|thumb|Chris: The original brony.]]
'''''My Little Pony''''' is a line of [[toys]] and animated programs intended for girls aged 4-8, although its [[wikipedia:My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic|most recent incarnation]] has earned favorable acclaim among adults, and a cult following called "bronies", with the other term "pegasisters" used for female fans. Chris is one of the few bronies to exist before the ''My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic'' cartoon gained popularity, and picked up an interest in the franchise after being introduced to it by [[Megan]] in [[2007]], buying several of the toys as well as making custom-made ''My Little Pony'' dolls for his friends. He has since developed an interest in the ''Friendship is Magic'' cartoon.

==Chris and ponies==
[[File:Poorcamo.jpg|thumb|left|One of Chris's ponies, as seen in his [[bedroom]].]]

The homemade ponies vary between being blatant ripoffs of [[anime]] characters, most notably the titular character from ''[[wikipedia:Naruto|Naruto]]'' and [[Wikipedia:Edward Elric|Edward Elric]] from ''[[Wikipedia:Fullmetal Alchemist|Fullmetal Alchemist]]'', and horrible [[Wikipedia:Mary Sue|Mary Sues]] such as [[Cherokee|Cheroki-Chan]], who is clearly based on the [[Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)|comic-book version of Chris]], and Crystal, [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|whose origin is obvious]].

In his infamous [[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE|FUTURE MESSAGE]], Chris first made his love of My Little Pony known when he recommended to all his viewers that they buy MLP figures of their favorite color to stroke and rub against their cheek, claiming that it was "very therapeutic" and that one could talk to the ponies and pretend that they were girls they wanted to ask out, to help them build confidence. At the time, this was viewed as a very revealing aspect of Chris's life, earning him the mockery of [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] and [[4chan]] yet again.

In [[CWC Update 18 March 2009 More Updated]], his ''My Little Pony'' figurines can be seen hanging from his ceiling.

Chris used a picture of Applejack from ''Friendship is Magic'' as his [[Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia]] forum avatar, although his screen name was modeled after the name of another major character in the series--[[Rainbow]] [[Tomgirl|Dash]].

[[Image:ponyboy.jpg|thumb|Chris's Applejack avatar.]]

A ''Friendship is Magic'' Rainbow Dash toy can be sighted in the background of "[[Correction of EX relationship status]]" and a G3 My Little Pony sticker can be seen on Chris's [[3DS]] in the [[Wristwatch-SwissWatch for Jeremy "Thorg"]] video.

Chris also has a ''Friendship is Magic'' playlist on his [[YouTube]] account that includes all the episodes.<ref>[http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL20EBD1B6E8BB9E6F Chris's ''My Little Pony - Friendship is Magic'' playlist on YouTube]</ref> Considering [[Ghostbusters|his]] [[Transformers|previous]] [[Pokémon|track]] [[The Adventures of the American Rabbit|record]] for loving children's shows, it's not exactly surprising. In the [[Facebook]] note he made on 31 [[March 2012]], he complains about "gum gabbing gossip columnists working for a corrupt editor", which is the plot for the episode [http://mlp.wikia.com/wiki/Ponyville_Confidential "Ponyville Confidential"] (which aired not too long before the note was made), the giveaway being that the ''nom de plume'' used in the episode was "Gabby Gums."

On 24 [[April 2012]], Chris wrote a note on his Facebook, calling for the rescue of the ''MLP:FiM'' character "Derpy Hooves", a character who is characterized by her lazy eyes and [[Slow-in-the-minds|comical method of thinking]], whose first speaking appearance in the episode "The Last Roundup" was re-edited because one person (who would later be heavily criticized by the ''MLP:FiM'' fanbase) thought Derpy's voice and personality in said appearance was offensive to the disabled. Naturally, Chris saw it as a vehicle to gain more pity towards him by sympathizing with a character that appeared to have some sort of disorder.

On 26 [[June 2012]], Chris whined about dark pony-related media on his Facebook via [[Twitter]]. He mentioned watching an animated adaption of the infamous fanfiction ''[http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/cupcakes-my-little-pony-fanfiction Cupcakes]'' and SHED.MOV (an episode of HotDiggedyDemon's ''[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/WebAnimation/PonyDotMov PONY.MOV]'' series). He took particular offense at Rainbow Dash, a tomboyish character, being gorily killed in both videos and, in a characteristic fit of fatuous [[Chris and his Ego|egotism]], suggested that it was done because people hate [[Tomgirl Saga|tomboys and tomgirls]]. He went on to rant about the "Dark Parodies" being the reason behind his writer's block, before descending into the usual tirade of hatred against people in general.

In a twist of irony, it was recently discovered that Chris has not one, <ref>[http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2FD70214E0CF6E92 Jappleack Playlist on Chris' YT account]</ref> but two <ref>[http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2f2iqihk1im2B1M7ZXJyoCd-gkDLXYCQ Jackie and Jerry playlist on Chris' YT account] </ref> playlists from HotDiggedyDemon, [[Chris and hypocrisy|the creator of SHED.MOV that he hated so much.]] Also, he eventually would share a word of wisdom HotDiggedyDemon posted to his Facebook account that trolls noted would be really useful for himself.

[[File:LegoDerpy.jpg|thumb|150px|left|Chris's Lego pony in question; [[Chris and art|talented]] as always.]]

In 2013, Chris's actions would cause him to become a social pariah to the Brony community by calling out voice actress [[Wikipedia:Tara Strong|Tara Strong]] (who voices Twilight Sparkle on the ''Friendship is Magic'' series) on her "Twilightlicious" video, claiming that she was tainting the name of the characters she had voiced by apparently supporting trolling and bullying. Many trolls had responded that his actions were, to say the very least, ''ridiculous'', due to him [[Autism|misunderstanding the context of her video]] and expecting a well-known celebrity [[Chris and his Ego|to personally answer to him]]. This certainly would have ended in Chris not hearing squat from Tara, had a troll not decided to forward his rant to her Facebook account. This is what she had to say:

{{quotebox|"I don't think I've seen anyone put an ugly spin on something this outrageously for their own attention. Anyone who follows me know that I'm on a huge anti-bullying platform, and even wrote and produced a song about it.

All my "twolling" as we on Twitter call it is completely adorable and makes people smile. Christian's article makes me angry & disappointed. Hope I never meet the guy."}}

In other words, Tara immediately and understandably chastises him despite not meeting him before in her life, saying he's probably someone who would pull this stunt for attention, and makes note of her work in anti-bullying campaigns (which is something Chris would obviously not put any effort into researching). Chris did not respond, but in all likelihood ignored every word of what she said and dismissed her as a '''"DANG, DIRTY TROLL!"''' like he does with anybody who does not [[White knight|enable him]]. Eventually, though, he put her song "Take My Hand" on the [[Three-Quarter Woman]] CD.

[[File:RainbowChrissy.JPG|thumb|right|200px|Chris's Rainbow Dash cosplay.]]
[[File:OmegaconA.jpg|thumb|150px|left|Note his trademark purple sunglasses]]

When the ''[[Wikipedia:My Little Pony: Equestria Girls|Equestria Girls]]'' trailer was released, Chris threw a ''fit'' on Facebook, citing that it would attract ''"[[pedofork|pedofile]] (sic) perverts"'' into the fanbase.<ref>[[:File:Chris-Chan - FB - Equestria Girls.png]]</ref> Never mind that the ''MLP:FiM'' fanbase has always had perverts (not to mention that ''so does every other fanbase in the world'') and he has drawn porn of underage characters in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' 8]]. He then goes on to say that the ''Friendship is Magic'' crew is "Out Of Their Minds", immediately after saying "With All Due Respect," even going so far as to name-drop Lauren Faust, who at that point had left the show more than a year prior. He then comments on his own note, loudly demanding in ALL CAPS that somebody pull the plug on it. Much to the surprise of nobody, Hasbro Studios did not respond to Chris' suggestions. Oh, and he [[Chris and hypocrisy|later "liked" some videos related to the movie online and named it his #2 favorite]].

In [[October 2014]], Chris posted his own [[Lego]] 'Derpy' to his Facebook page.

On [[26 December 2014]], Chris donned a pair of novelty ''My Little Pony'' sunglasses as a "disguise" while vandalizing a''[[Sonic the Hedgehog|Sonic Boom]]'' display.

On 19 [[January 2015]], a photo was leaked depicting Chris dressed up in a Rainbow Dash costume. His unclean, frazzled appearance unsurprisingly doesn't mix at all with her general character design.

On 29 [[August 2015]], Chris was seen cosplaying, again, at [[OmegaCon]]; this time as "Vinyl Scratch, A.K.A. DJ Pon3!". This time, at least, Chris put a little effort into his costume; nevertheless, the outcome was still horrible.

{{clear}}

===Bronies===
Bronies are the teenage-to-adult males who have become fans of the ''Friendship is Magic'' incarnation of the My Little Pony franchise. While one would think Christian would be proud, or even claim responsibility for, bronies given the contents of his [[FUTURE MESSAGE]], Chris manages to once again defy expectations and common sense. Chris seems to hate all bronies simply because they have [[duck]]s and are therefore [[JERKS]]. When Chris became a tomgirl, he considered himself a pegasister, which adult female fans of ''Friendship is Magic'' are called. It was only matter of time before he started making demands on Facebook for bronies to bow down to their pegasister counterparts. He seems to blame the parts of the fandom which offend him, such as ''PONY.MOV'' (a satirical internet cartoon series which--believe it or not--is an affectionate parody of the show), on the wretched brony MALES and their twisted perversions while assuring himself that the female fans of the show are no doubt responsible for all the elements of the fandom he admires and [[mass debate]]s to.

As of [[BronyCon]] his stance against men who like ponies seems to have softened somewhat. He was photographed smiling in the presence of other men and didn't accuse any of them being discriminatory towards him. However by all accounts (including his own) he still gravitated towards talking toward woman at the convention. Its likely that he secretly still finds men he doesn't know to be offensive, regardless of if they are wearing a pony hat or not. The other possibility is that he simply isn't interested in Bronies because, despite his claims, he is still only interested in socializing for [[china|one thing]] that no man can give him.

==Cutie mark==
[[File:Cutie mark.jpg|thumb|"Being really gross has got to be my destiny, 'cause that's what my cutie mark is telling me."]]

In the ''My Little Pony'' universe, a cutie mark is a symbol on both an individual pony's thighs, representing their special talent and interest. Chris's "special talent", it seems, is being a [[tomgirl]]. Prior to the [[Tomgirl Saga]], Chris likely would have defined himself by his art or perhaps his [[love quest]], but at this point seems to be anchoring his entire personality to his tomgirl status. Somewhat ironic is the fact that despite the implication of tomgirlhood being his special talent, Chris is a [[Tomgirl Pictures|very, ''very'' unconvincing tomgirl]].

In a [[Forgot the Glitter|leaked video]] released on [[February 2012|25 February 2012]], Chris was spotted showing off a drawing on his left thigh which he calls his "cutie mark". It is the combination of the two gender symbols , surprisingly ''not'' having anything to do with [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] for once. It does not seem to be a real tattoo, but instead is drawn on, most likely with his [[Chris and art|felt-tip pens]].

In [[June 2017]], Chris shared the [[:File:NightStarCutieMark.png|result]] of a cutie mark generator quiz to [[Facebook]].<ref>[[June 2017 Facebook posts#Chris's MLP mark]]</ref> Inspired, Chris would later that day use the design to create a [[Night Star|new original character]]. Trolls would underestimate [[NightStar2891|how far he would take this]].

==Ponysona==
{{main|Night Star}}

Chris's ponysona is uncreatively named "[[Night Star]]". He has created a second [[Twitter]] account under this name, using it to white knight himself against [[trolls]] and potential [[sweethearts]].

Chris has also created ponysonas for [[Barb]] and [[Bob]]. They names are "Sugar Darling" and "Gallop Crush", respectively.

==BronyCon 2017==
{{main|BronyCon}}

[[File:Chris' outfit Bronycon day 3.jpg|thumb|200px|left|Chris at BronyCon. As of late September 2017, he is [[Cville Pride|still wearing the unicorn horn]].]]

Chris attended BronyCon 2017 from 11 August to 13 August of that year.

{{clear}}

===Art tributes===
[[Heart level|Exhilarated]] by the events of BronyCon 2017, Chris produced a number of drawings during and after the event, intended as gifts for panel guests and attendees. Optimistic, on 15 August, he attempted to win back the affections of [[DoopieDoOver]] and voice actor Tabitha St. Germain by sending them art via his Night Star sockpuppet account - he was swiftly blocked again.

<center><gallery>
File:Spike-sonichu.jpg|For Cathy Weseluck
File:Spike_in_a_Pikachu_costume.jpg|For [[Chris and his Ego|attendees]]
File:Night_Star_%26_Wishing_Wasp.jpg|For [[Avalon Porter]]
File:CMC Drawing.jpg|For Michelle Creber, Claire Corlett, and Madeleine Peters
File:KSheridan Drawing.jpg|For Kelly Sheridan
File:Bsalgart.jpg|For Bsalgart (artist)
File:IanMcMurchie.jpg|For Ian McMurchie
File: Spike Sonichu0 1.jpg|Spike reading Equestria's [[Sonichu 0]] (for Cathy Weseluck)
File:Spike Sonichu0 2.jpg|2
File:TabithaDrawing.jpg|<s>For Tabitha St. Germain</s>
File:BubbleGummy.jpg|<s>For [[DoopieDoOver]]</s>
File:StarlightGlimmer2.jpg|Sango/Starlight Glimmer (for Kelly Sheridan)
</gallery></center>

==BronyMate dating site==
{{main|BronyMate}}

Chris made a profile, NightStar1982, on the site on 27 August 2017.

==Unicorn cosplay==
{{main|Unicorn cosplay}}

==Christine Doll==
{{main|Christine Doll}}

==In the comic==
[[File:Sonichu 12-9 Cover.jpg|thumb|200px|Sonichu 12-9 front cover]]

Like any eight-year-old girl with the hopes of marrying a blue prince in a fairytale wedding with her BFF pony by her side, [[Wedding_Comic|''Sonichu'' Special #2]] reveals to its unfortunate readers that Chris might have harbored similar thoughts, as his ideal wedding also features a My Little Pony.

After having received a blessing from the best [wo]man [[Sarah Nicole Hammer]], the recently united Chris and [[Ivy]] leave the church where the wedding was held in a carriage pulled by what many trolls speculate to be a badly-drawn [[Wikipedia:List_of_My_Little_Pony characters#Rainbow_Dash|Rainbow Dash]], which is harnessed to the carriage with what appears to be the Boulder Badge from [[Pokémon]].

In [[Sonichu 12]] Robee performs the "Sonic Rainboom", a stunt perfomed in the show when Rainbow Dash goes really fast and makes a rainbow.

Chris has revealed that [[Sonichu 12-9]] (formerly labeled Sonichu 13) will include the self-described ''[[Chris and his Ego|fan-fiction but potentially canon]]'' life story of Night Star.<ref>[[CLog 08142017 - More Positive Content]]</ref><ref>[https://www.patreon.com/posts/sonichu-12-9-14049434?utm_campaign=postshare&utm_medium=social&utm_source=facebook]</ref> Chris has teased small details of the comic, including equine versions of [[Borb]].<ref>[[:File:NightStarBorb.png]]</ref>

{{clear}}

==Gallery==
<center>
{| class="wikitable collapsible" width="600"
! colspan="4"|The Gallery of My Little Pony Straightness
|-
!Chris' creation
!Original
![[Card games|TCG card]]
!Notes
|-
|[[File:Chris Pony.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] The original Cheroki-Chan, made with Chris's own [[hair]] and Crayola Fuckin' Model Magic [[File:03-CWC Cheroki-Chan1.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] The improved store-bought Cheroki-Chan
|[[File:Chero.jpg|frameless|center|120px|text-bottom]] Pony in Seaspray Pose
|[[File:01-Cheroki-Chan_Card.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]][[File:02-Cheroki-Chan Card2.jpg|120px|center|text-bottom]][[File:159-ChrokiChan.jpg|120px|center|text-bottom]]
|Chris's depiction of himself as a pony...or rather, a horse- [[Chris and his Ego|too awesome to be a common pony]]. Just as Chris, Cheroki-Chan has a few [[Autism|quirks]], likes to [[Chris and art|draw and color]], but above all, he is [[Death threats|noble and honorable]]. Cheroki-Chan [[Dreams|"creams"]] of finding a [[sweetheart]] for himself, yet is having problems, mainly from being rejected once by that [[Chris and race|multi-green pony]], possibly [[Megan Schroeder|camouflaged]].
|-
|[[File:07-CWC Camo-Flage.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Camo-Flage
|[[File:Camo.jpg|frameless|120px|center|text-bottom]] Pony in [[Wikipedia:List_of_My_Little_Pony_characters#Rainbow_Dash|Rainbow Dash]] pose
|[[File:06-Camo-Flage Card.jpg|frameless|120px|center|text-bottom]]
|Representation of [[Megan Schroeder]]. She [[Friend zone|rejected]] Cheroki-Chan's advances, and she is Jonhlamence's little sister.<ref>[[:File:12-Johnlamence Card.jpg]]</ref>
|-
|[[File:49-CWC Mimmbo Bo Boruto.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Mimmbo Bo Boruto
|[[File:Mimmbo.jpg|frameless|center|120px|text-bottom]] Pony in [[Wikipedia:List_of_My_Little_Pony_characters#Rainbow_Dash|Rainbow Dash]] pose
|[[File:48-Mimmbo Bo Boruto Card.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]]
|Custom pony based on and made for [[Daniel Mimms]]. ''[[Wikipedia:Naruto|Naruto]]'' is another inspiration.
|-
|[[File:46-CWC Squall Metal Alchamest.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] [[Wikipedia:Full Metal Alchemist|Squall Metal Alchemest]]
|[[File:Squall.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Pony in [[Wikipedia:List_of_My_Little_Pony_characters#Rainbow_Dash|Rainbow Dash]] pose
|[[File:45-Squall Metal Alchemest Card.jpg|frameless|120px|center|text-bottom]]
|An inter-dimensional pony with [[Barbara|motherly]] issues. Based on [[Wikipedia:Edward Elric|Edward Elric]] from ''[[Wikipedia:Fullmetal Alchemist|Fullmetal Alchemist]]'', though part of the name may come from [[Wikipedia:Squall Leonhart|Squall Leonhart]] of [[Wikipedia:Final Fantasy VIII|''Final Fantasy VIII'']].
|-
|[[File:10-CWC Crystal.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Crystal
|[[File:Crys.jpg|frameless|120px|center|text-bottom]] Pony Cutie Keen Bean
|[[File:09-Crystal Card.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]]
|Commemorative pony of [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Crystal]], Chris's future daughter.
|-
|[[File:13-CWC Johnlamence.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Jonhlamence's cyberwarrior
|[[File:Sala.jpg|frameless|center|120px|text-bottom]] Pony in Rarity Unicorn Pose
|[[File:12-Johnlamence Card.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]]
|Camo-flage's older brother combined with the [[Pokémon]] [[Wikipedia:List of Pokémon (320–386)#Salamence|Salamence]]. Based on Megan's brother [[John's Custom Gundam: Sisterly Rescue|John]].
|-
|[[File:18-CWC Ty Game2.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Ty Game
|[[File:ty_game.jpg|frameless|120px|center|text-bottom]] Pony in Rainbow Swirl Pose
|[[File:16-Ty Game Card.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]]
|[[Video games|Gamer]] Pony. A Christmas gift for Tyler, the son of Tony the Gym Leader.
|-
|[[File:22-CWC Bee-Riana.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Bee Riana
|[[File:Bee reana (yellow with the antena.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Ponies Toola-Roola (left) and Meadowbrook (right)
|[[File:21-Bee-Riana Card.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]]
|When he bought the two-Ponies-set, Chris took Toola-Roola's antennae and put them on Meadowbrook to create Bee-Riana. A gift for Briana, one of the daughters of Gym Leader Tony.
|-
|[[File:26-CWC Educait.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Educait
|[[File:Edu.jpg|frameless|120px|center|text-bottom]] Pony in Sunny Daze Pose
|[[File:25-Educait Card.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]]
|A nerdy Pony. It is of the [[The Wallflower|Wallflower]] type. A gift for Caitlyn, the youngest daughter of Tony the Gym Leader.
|-
|[[File:30-CWC Honeysumerah.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Honeysumerah
|[[File:Honey.jpg|frameless|120px|center|text-bottom]] Pony in Sweet Breeze Pose
|[[File:29-Honeysumerah Card.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]]
|Based on a [[Britney Spears|shallow Pop Star]]. "Stickler for a tickler" comes from a throwaway ''[[Family Guy]]'' gag, from [[Wikipedia:When You Wish Upon a Weinstein|"When You Wish Upon a Weinstein"]].
|-
|[[File:33-CWC_Modest_Manna.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Modest Manna
|[[File:Modest.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Pony in Sweet Breeze Pose
|[[File:32-Modest Manna Card.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]]
|[[Anna McLerran|Mormon]] pony.
|-
|[[File:36-CWC Linnhadey.JPG|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]] Linnhadey
|[[File:Lin.jpg|frameless|center|120px|text-bottom]] Pony in Beachberry Pose
|[[File:35-Linnhadey Card.jpg|frameless|120px|center|text-bottom]]
|'[[Autism|Unique]] and [[McDonalds|Lovin' it]]' Pony. Based on Linnea, Anna's friend and co-worker.
|-
|[[File:43-CWC Federico.JPG|frameless|center|120px|text-bottom]] Federico
|[[File:Fede.jpg|frameless|center|120px|text-bottom]] Pony in Beachberry Pose
|[[File:42-Federico Card.jpg|frameless|120px|center|text-bottom]]
|[[Spanish]] Pony. He is annoying because "chicos are chicos."
|-
|[[File:39-CWC Buttonbeck.JPG|frameless|120px|center|text-bottom]] [[Nudes|Butt]]onbeck
|[[File:Bottom beck.jpg|frameless|120px|center|text-bottom]] Pony in Diva Pose
|[[File:38-Buttonbeck Card.jpg|120px|frameless|center|text-bottom]]
|[[Rosechu|Generic soulless and flavorless]] Pony.
|}
</center>

==Fan videos==
{{deletedvideo}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name = THE original brony
| video = {{#ev:youtube|8aXhm_sm3bU}}
| Stardate = 8 March 2012
| Maker = [https://www.youtube.com/user/TheCWCvilleLibrary TheCWCvilleLibrary]
| Subject =
| Video Type =
| Other Info =
}}

==See also ==
*[[Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE]]
*[[List of toys]]
==References==
<references />
==External links==
*''[[Wikipedia:My Little Pony|My Little Pony]]'' at [[Wikipedia]]
*<s> [http://www.megaupload.com/?d=F12XOB4B Chris's MLP collection photoset download] </s> - Dead link.
[[Category:Hobbies]]
[[Category:Toys]]
[[Category:Television shows]]

Li'l Chris

2017-09-22T15:36:00Z

Heather Dalley Wallflower Confirmed:

[[Image:LilChris.jpg|thumb|right|He's like the Velveteen Rabbit, except the Velveteen Rabbit isn't suffering.]]

<div style="position:fixed; bottom:0; right:0">[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|right|JULAY!]]</div>

'''Li'l Chris''' is [[Chris]]'s stuffed teddy bear. According to [[IRC (18 December 2008)|an IRC chat]], Chris created it at the "Create-a-Critter Workshop" in the [[Charlottesville, VA|Charlottesville]] [[Charlottesville Fashion Square|Fashion Square Mall]] after winning a gift certificate from a radio station, some time in his early 20's. Trolls initially assumed that Li'l Chris was not given much love or attention, as she was an [[Niggos|individual of a darker color]]. As it turned out, however, the bear had been receiving ''all too much'' love and attention. Chris pointedly informed his fans in October 2010 that Li'l Chris was a female bear in [[Pregnant Act]], despite naming it after himself. This made sense years later, after Chris believed he was a [[homos|male lesbian]].

For a while, it was thought that Lil' Chris was lost to the January 2014 Fire - This has since been proven false, as the bear can be seen resting on the end of one of Chris's shelves in his [[Donation Request]].
<center><gallery>
File:BuildaBear.jpg|The Build-a-Bear store in the mall where Chris obtained Li'l Chris.
File:ECP 00020.jpg|Chris and the bear sharing a moment.
File:128747284554.png|Artist's rendition of [[Pregnant Act]].
File:Bearonhead.jpg|Chris and Li'l Chris engaging in lewd behavior.
</gallery></center>

==See also==
*[[Captain's Log, Stardate October 27th, 2008]]
*[[CWCFlyingElephants]]

{{Relics of Fail}}

[[Category:Imaginary Family Members]]
[[Category:Relics of Fail]]
[[Category:Toys]]

It took a talking bear to give the name a young boy loves

2017-09-22T15:35:14Z

Heather Dalley Wallflower Confirmed:

'''"IT TOOK A TALKING BEAR TO GIVE THE NAME A YOUNG BOY LOVES"''' is the title of an article that appeared in the ''Richmond Times-Dispatch'' on 29 December [[1993]] that provides an independent account of how [[Christian Weston Chandler|Chris]] [[Christopher's name change|changed his name]].<ref>[http://pqasb.pqarchiver.com/timesdispatch/access/615847621.html?dids=615847621:615847621&FMT=ABS&FMTS=ABS:FT&date=Dec+29%2C+1993&author=Barbara+Green&pub=Richmond+Times+-+Dispatch&edition=&startpage=N-4&desc=IT+TOOK+A+TALKING+BEAR+TO+GIVE+THE+NAME+A+YOUNG+BOY+LOVES ProQuest Archive of original Richmond Times-Dispatch article] (''links to an abstract of the article; full article requires subscription'')</ref>

<div style="position:fixed; bottom:0; right:0">[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|right|JULAY!]]</div>

== Text of the article ==

{{quotenews|This is a Christmas-season story about how a bear gave a boy his name.

The bear is [[Christopher's name change|Leonard Bearstein]], leader of the all-bear pops orchestra that entertains shoppers at Regency Square during the holidays.

The boy is Christopher Weston Chandler, 11, now called Christian. He met Leonard Bearstein during Christmas [[1992]].

The boy's father, [[Bob Chandler|Robert F. Chandler Jr.]], told the story.

"We were in [[Richmond]] on a visit last Christmas with our son Christopher, then almost 11," Chandler said. "We lived in [[Ruckersville]], about 10 miles north of [[Charlottesville]], at the time.

"And, as many people from west of Richmond do, we made one of our stops at Regency Square."

Christopher is a high-functioning [[autism|autistic]] child. While intellectually his age level is 12 or 13, socially he is around age 7 or 8. He has some [[Megan Schroeder|behavior problems with his peers]] and relates better with children a few years younger than him, his father said.

Christopher didn't talk until he was 7 years old. But thanks to his parents' hard work, he talks a [[sonic the Hedgehog|blue streak]] now.

And while visiting Regency Square during Christmas 1992, he struck up a conversation with Leonard Bearstein.

"Since this was early in the Christmas season on a Thursday afternoon, the crowd was light," Chandler said. "The conversation between Leonard and Christopher lasted -- on and off, between songs -- about an hour. Christopher was spellbound."

Something unusual happened during that conversation. When Leonard Bearstein, in a decidedly British accent, asked Christopher his name, the bear must have misunderstood what the boy replied.

"Leonard started calling our son Christian. What better name for the Christmas season?

"And the name stuck like glue. From that time on, for the past year, his name has been Christian Weston Chandler. Christian is very emphatic about that."

Good things have happened since Leonard Bearstein changed Christopher's name to Christian more than a year ago.

In September, father and son moved to Chesterfield County. Chandler and his wife, [[Barbara Chandler|Barbara]], lived there when they married in [[1980]], before General Electric Co. transferred him to the Charlottesville area.

Mr. Chandler is retired now and looks after Christian during the week.

Mrs. Chandler works for Virginia Power in Charlottesville and commutes here from Ruckersville, in Greene County, on weekends.

"The Greene County School system was not equipped to teach an autistic child," Mr. Chandler said. "The Chesterfield County school system has accepted him with open arms."

Christian is in sixth grade at Providence Middle School.

This fall, on his own initiative, Christian entered a contest based on a favorite TV cartoon character. He was a winner in the [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes|"Sonic the Hedgehog Watch and Win Sweepstakes."]] His prize: a $1,000 shopping spree at Kay-Bee Toys after the first of the year.

And the Chandlers have started the process of legally changing his name.

As it happens, Mr. Chandler said he wanted to name his son Christian when the boy was born. As a sing-along leader at Matt's British Pub in Shockoe Slip in the late 1970s, he was familiar with the name among fellow Anglophiles and English friends.

"I was chicken," he said. "It took Leonard the bear to name him Christian.

"Although we live in Chesterfield, closer to Cloverleaf Mall and Chesterfield Towne Center," Mr. Chandler added, [[Christopher's name change|"a bear at Regency Square named my son."]]
}}

==References==

<references />

[[Category:Historical Documents]]
[[Category:Media that has been published in real life]]

Group Embargo on GameStop, Best Buy, and Simon Shopping Centers

2017-09-22T15:34:27Z

Heather Dalley Wallflower Confirmed:

'''Group Embargo on GameStop, Best Buy, and Simon Shopping Centers''' is the third and final video uploaded to Chris's [[YouTube]] channel on 29 [[November 2015]]. While it did not include a description, Chris shortly provided a link to it on his [[Facebook]] page with the notice:
<div style="position:fixed; bottom:0; right:0">[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|right|JULAY!]]</div>

{{quotebox|Until I am no longer banned from All Four Charlottesville, VA GameStop stores, as well as the Best Buy store and ‪#‎FashionSquare‬ Shopping Center, I hereby am on an Embargo against ‪#‎GamsStop‬, ‪#‎BestBuy‬, and ‪#‎SIMON‬ Malls. And I Encourage ALL of my friends and fans to Stand With Me and not go to any GameStops, Best Buys and SIMON Malls Anywhere.

Thank you all for your support in resolving this problem for a better tomorrow!}}

In this video, even more of old Chris returns, but he seems to have tamed his [[Virgin with Rage|anger]] to some extent. Instead of jumping and shouting at the camera, he puts an emphasis on his claims in the typical [[Chris's mannerisms|way Chris does]]. He certainly feels [[Chris and his ego|a great deal of power]] in the situation, stating that if he is [[kick the autistic|hurt and bullied]], all autistic people and [[Tomgirl Saga|LBGT]] people are as well. He also encourages his "thousands to millions of fans worldwide" to follow him on his endeavors, even though the only videos he post that break over ten thousand views are the ones that are [[HelloLadyFans|batshit crazy]].

His victim complex is quite interesting in this one, as he believes the [[Yellow Shirt|employee he maced]] has family at [[Best Buy]] that are banning him for no reason, and tries to blame his sexuality, gender and autism for acting like a tard. In true Chris fashion, he makes an insincere apology, then attacks the guy he maced. He also stressed that banning him would make it bad for everyone, and unbanning him would give them all good karma. He also believes wars could be prevented by [[My Little Pony]] and the Care Bears.
== Video ==
{{Infobox/video
| name = Group Embargo on GameStop, Best Buy, and Simon Shopping Centers
| video = {{#ev:youtube|ZhM1rDTwvY8}}
| stardate = 29 [[November 2015]]
| saga = {{Sonic Boom|text}}
| Subject Matter = {{Video games|Gamestop}}
| style = {{Rage|text}}
| shirt = {{MightyLesbianShirt|text}}
| previous = [[Family and Couples Figures Available for collecting and purchase. Also Sandy and Zapina Rosechu.]]
| next = [[Embargo Update 12/2/2015]]
}}

==Transcription==
Hello to all my loyal fans over the [[Internet]]. This is Christine Chandler coming to you live once again from [[14 Branchland Court|my house]] here. And uh, because I have not received a response I have a letter that I had, had written on November 12th, 2015, which that was a Thursday. And I believe I sent it um, either that same day or the day after on Friday. But anyway, uh, I’m going to read this letter and if you, and it’s addressing definitely to the local [[GameStop|GameStops]] in [[Charlottesville]], [[Virginia]], all four of them, as well as [[Fashion Square Mall]] and, believe it or not, even the [[Best Buy]]. So without furder ado, I’m going to read this letter.

Yeah, and unfortunately I did not know his name, so he’s referred to as sir and what-, and similar pronouns. So anyway, I wrote, uh, “Dear [[Yellow Shirt|Yellow-Shirt Assistant Manager]] of the Fashion Square GameStop. I never got your name, I’m sorry. To preface this letter, I most humbly apologize for everything I have done as of the release date of the Sonic Boom video games, around November 11th, 2014, in regards to the [[Sonic Boom Protests|protest]] of [[SEGA]] changing [[Sonic the Hedgehog]]’s arm color to blue from tan. More recently I have learned that the next console Sonic the Hedgehog game, his arm cumber will be back to tan, and therefore I have concluded the protest against SEGA and made the official statement on my [[Facebook]] group page, [[FIX SONIC'S ARMS IMMEDIATELY, SEGA!!!]] To recap and make the story short, in the, in Sonic Boom, SEGA had changed Sonic’s arm color. I felt most upset about it. I protested by discouraging the purchase of said games and related Sonic Boom merchandise, and encouraging sending everything Sonic Boom back to SEGA. I had contacted SEGA of America. I received not good responses on the topic. I caused male, I caused malcontent against me and my peaceful protest.” I ended up [[banned]] from the four local above GameStops, and aside from handing the udder three locals, where I sent a carbon copy as well.

[''loses place''] Ah, da da da da da da da....Alright, um, “And upon the final major shock to my fear, paranoia, and nervous system at the Fashion Square location, I retaliated with a show of pepper spray container and left with a show of what was originally meant to be a warning to not ban me ever, scaring the [[DIRTY CRAPPED BRIEFS|living crap out of me]], or just plain giving me a bad day. It turned out to be [[26 December 2014|a more worse day for everyone]]. And since then, the jail time kept me from getting very important and detailed packing done for moving back to my renovated house on the following December 31st, 2014. Also, I had emptied the thing of pepper spray, downward into a nearby hole—big hole—outside, and disposed of said canister into the hole. I did not have any pepper spray on me since, court dates were had and maintained, along with respective [[Chris and psychology#Past instances of professional help (or lack thereof)|mental therapy and analysis]] towards the fact that I had felt most overwhelmed, paranoid, and wanting to defend myself from such being banned and personal attacks to me. And upon the court’s conclusion, the whole mess has become over with, and all should be resolved, as I am praying to achieve today.

“Upon the recent conclusion of reversing the arm-color change among the udder details, while related, had little to do with the protest, including game glitches, story content, whatever, I understand and realize that the protest was not only a waste of time and energy, ultimately, but that it was among the worst mistakes I have ever done in my life, not counting what the Internet [[trolls|haters]] had blackmailed me into performing and video-recording since [[2007]]. And I most deeply and seriously regret having begun the useless protest in the first place, and I more regret ultimately feeling need to defend myself and spritzing pepper spray at you, the Yellow-Shirt Assistant Manager. [''looks at camera''] [[Chris and remorse|I am really, very sorry.]]

“And with all that, I most humbly request to be unbanned from all of the local GameStops in Charlottesville, Virginia. I will be most appreciative of not being forced to waste gas money to go out of town and most distance, as far as the one GameStop within the US military housing...of Fort Lee! Here in Virginia. Fort Lee! And, appreciating the soldiers who helped defend the United States after my father, [[Robert Franklin Chandler, Jr.]], having served around World War Two, stationed in Seoul, Korea, in the Signal Corps. I am serious. I did do that. I had required pre-owned Pikachu [[Amiibo]] figures for materials for my [[Sonichu]] figures that I make and sell on [[Etsy]], on my shop, Cwcville Shopping.

“But I digress. Not only will I be most appreciative, but I will bring good karma to you and all the other employees of your GameStop, and the other three GameStops as well. And we can all be forgiven and forget the whole mess in good strides of the future. [''hand flourish''] Everyone wins. But if I am left banned, then everyone loses, with the most heavy symbolic [[HippoOnYourHead|hippopotamus of guilt, shame, and loathing]] upon yourselves, because [''clenches fist''] not only are you most discriminating against one person, but a high-functioning [[autism|autistic]], [[homos#Chris and transsexuality|lesbian trans woman]], famous author, with headache-inducing mental handicaps, who would never intentionally or unintentionally [[death threats|harm]] any living thing without any reason whatsoever. Again, everyone loses if I am left banned from errywhere!

“And speaking of [[Yellow Shirt|yellow-shirted]] friend, I believe you either have a secret family within or are moon-, moonlighting at the Best Buy in Charlottesville as well. To make this, to make that story short, a few days after I got out of jail on December 28th, 2014, and I had absolutely no pepper spray on my person whatsoever, because as I had mentioned earlier, I had emptied the canister and disposed of the can-, canister. [[Best Buy#Attempted shoplifting|I had done nothing at the Best Buy]] prior to that day. And a certain [[manajerk|manager]] spokes the living crap outta me, tellin’ me I was not welcome there, that I was banned from there. I had asked why. He did not give me any answer. Then I reached into my bag to get some money out, little funds to see if I could pay my way out of this. I had not said anything about the pepper spray whatsoever, but I put my hand in the bag, and his subordinate shouts, ‘He’s going for the pepper spray!’ I stopped in surprise after hearing that. Ultimately, I left the store. I had gone there again months later to be met with the same shpiel, and no answer to why. I even went over dere head, on the telephone, to try to resolve it. Nothing.

"Then last Tuesday, November 10th, I went there once again to buy [[LEGO]] Dimensions Pack with a ten-dollar certificate. I got met in the back of the store with the shpiel once again, and this time I asked why and I finally got the answer. They said that I, quote, threatened them with pepper spray, and we have video footage, unquote. But again, that first time they said anything about me not being welcome there, I had not, nor ever, threatened anyone at that store. Nor had I any pepper spray on any of my visits there, then, and prior.

“Therefore, I faff, I feel I have to pin the blame onto you, sir, for that, my yellow-shirted friend. Either of having family there, or giving me more of a difficult time--[''misreads''] and giving me more of a difficult time, then I was already going under. Or, you do have a second job between the GameStop and the Best Buy. Hmm! And I would expect, that might be something the Better Business Bureau might like to hear, perhaps? So once again, you can eff, give everyone good karma by forgiving me and forgetting the whole mess, and unbanning me from these four GameStops, as well as the one Best Buy, and thus allowing me to be welcomed back to Fashion Square Mall as well. Everyone wins. Good peace of mind. Or leave me banned from everywhere, and nobody wins with the hippopotamus weights upon each of our heads forever!

“And I reiterate, I am really very sorry for pepper-spraying you. I am really very sorry for making the protest against SEGA in the first place. I have no pepper spray, and I promise never to cause anyone harm or trouble ever again. All that needs to be done for full peaceful resolutions is to unban me from everywhere. And I have stated in this later. Please, do the positive thing, and bring good karma upon us all. I’m looking towards, I’m looking forward to a written, detailed response from you and everyone who gets this letter, documenting that I am no longer banned from the Charlottesville, Virginia GameStops, and Best Buy, and Fashion Square. Thank you and have a very good and safe day. Sincerely, Christine Weston Chandler.”

But, right now, it’s November 29th, more than two weeks since I mailed the letter to all f-, four said locations at the GameStops, and I have not heard anything. Therefore, I am making this video. I [''shakes fist''], Christine Weston Chandler, am quite upset by not receiving any response whatsoever. No-, as well as still being banned from not only the four GameStops, but the two other places as well, Best Buy here, and Fashion Square. And, I am it-, I am issuing an embargo on all GameStops, as well as GameStop.com. And every one of my [[True and Loyal Fanbase|thousands to millions of fans worldwide]], I encourage you all to follow me in this embargo! Never con-, never go to or conduct any business at any GameStop location anywhere. Do not even go to GameStop.com. US, UK, anywhere in the four websites. None of them. Do not go to any of those places. As well as, I am not, I am banning Best Buy as well. No Best Buy, no BestBuy.com, no Best Buy UK, whatever. As well as all Simon shopping malls! [''removes [[Dramatic glasses removal|glasses]] dramatically''] I’m very serious in this. Your lack of response has left me most upset! My [[Yellow Shirt|yellow-shirted foe!]] [''pounds knee''] Mm! And you will lose business because of this! And if you do not have me unbanned from all four of the local GameStops, as well as the Best Buy, and Fashion Square...[''pounds knee again''] this multi-person ban from you all will still continue on. So you think about that. Bring back good karma to us all, or pretty much be damned. [''shouting now''] You’re discriminating against the LGBT community as well as the autism community! You decided to hate against us, when you hate against me. And we all know that love and friendship conquers hatred, and does a lot better. It could prevent a lot of wars, if we take to the l-, lessons learned from the positive friendship TV shows that are made available, including ''[[My Little Pony]]: Friendship Is Magic'' and ''The Care Bears''.

So anyway, embargo on the GameStops, the Best Buy, and Simon shopping malls, begins right now! [''points at camera''] Game over, GameStop. [''deep voice''] Gaaaame over! [[Spanish|El juego se acabado!]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Family and Couples Figures Available for collecting and purchase. Also Sandy and Zapina Rosechu.]]|nextlink=[[Embargo Update 12/2/2015]]|}}

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, 2015]]
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Main Page

2017-09-22T15:33:54Z

Heather Dalley Wallflower Confirmed:

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| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Christory}}</div>
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[[Category:Special]]

Cwcsicle

2017-09-22T15:33:03Z

Heather Dalley Wallflower Confirmed:

{{Honest}}
[[Image:CWCSICLE.jpg|thumb|Chris' previous experience with freezing his johnson.]]

<div style="position:fixed; bottom:0; right:0">[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|right|JULAY!]]</div>

'''Cwcsicle''' is a name of a video log entailing [[Chris]] sticking his [[duck]] in the snow for 15 minutes. It was made as part of the ''[[Wikipedia:Jackass 3D|Jackass 3D]]'' Prank Contest, in which the person who submitted the best prank would get to appear in ''Jackass 3D''. Needless to say, Chris did not win, as he violated both the rules and common sense; most ''Jackass''-style pranks are quite dangerous, so sending video footage (as opposed to plans or sketches) wasn't allowed.<ref>http://jackass-3d-contest.wonderhowto.com/blog/jackass-3d-prank-contest-0118504/</ref>

Chris also claims that it is impossible to change the onboard clock on one's cellphone; this is obviously untrue, but Chris may have automatic update of date and time on his [[Wikipedia:Motorola W315|Motorola W315]] and be too dim to know that it can be turned off. He may have feigned ignorance about this, in order to lie about the duration for which he performed this act of complete idiocy.

It is split into five parts: 100_2123 through 7.MOV. These titles seem to suggest that it was made in [[February 2010]]. Prior to the selling of the [[Autographed Photos]], it was the most recently-released work to feature the [[medallion]].

==Videos==

{{Infobox/video
| name = CWCsicle
| video = {{#ev:youtube|PjRRL4i6QZA}}
| stardate =
| subject = {{Television|text}}
| style = {{Comedy|text}}, {{Crazy|text}}
| shirt = {{SafetyParka|text}}
| other = {{Leaked|text}}, {{Live|text}}
| previous =
| next =
}}

==Transcripts==
===100_2123.MOV (0:25)===
''[Christian stands in his snow-covered backyard. He is dressed quite heavily, pointing the camera at himself [[Chris and cinematography|with a rather shaky hand]].]'' Hi, I'm Christian Chandler, uh, this is "[[Random-access humor|Frozen Stalactite]]". [''attempts to tilt camera towards crotch, thankfully missing it entirely.''] I'm gonna put my dick in the snow [''aims it back at his face''] and I'm gonna leave it in there for about 15 minutes. Currently it's 12:38 [''holds up his phone with his free hand''] according to my cellphone clock. If there's one clock you can not change, it's the one on your cellphone. [''pans camera down, revealing that he's buried himself waist-deep, then pans back up''] Okay, see ya'll in 15 minutes.

===100_2124.MOV (0:07)===
[''holding up phone''] Yeah, about 6 minutes in now. Whooh. Boy, it's cold. I've had p--[''video abruptly ends'']

===100_2125.MOV (0:10)===
[''carrying on from where the former left off, albeit with a little more urgency''] About 6 minutes in now. I've had previous experiences with, uh, freezing my dick, and I've even stretched it a bit. Right. I'll be checking back in se-in 7.

===100_2126.MOV (0:22)===
A-alrighty, it's 12:53 [''nearly beans himself in the face with his PSEye lens''] Let's pull me out. ENYGH! [''gets up and nearly loses balance. The camera goes out of focus, although Chris can be heard shivering. It then turns to focus on his crotch, with his pickle thankfully quite out of view. The sound of something scraping the mic can be heard as he examines his genitals.''] Feels blue. [''we go out of focus as we see Chris's duck. Not only is it within view, it has turned bright red and the camera is upside down. Shortly after, the camera turns away.''] Look at all that snow all over me. There's the hole it was in. [''we finally turn to Chris's face''] Heh. Kids, that is definitely something--[''video abruptly ends.'']

===100_2127.MOV (0:06)===
Everybody, I dare say that is one stunt you should not try at home. Peace out. [''We turn away and the camera is set down.'']

==References==
<references/>

==External links==
*[https://archive.org/details/cwcsicle Uncensored version]

{{LeakedVideos}}

[[Category:Chris-chan videos, February 2010]]
[[Category:Leaked videos]]
[[Category:Outdoor videos]]
[[Category:Certain videos of the naughty nature]]

Reggie Fils-Aimé

2017-09-22T15:32:23Z

Heather Dalley Wallflower Confirmed:

{{Articleofthenow}}
[[Image:Reginald Fils-Aime.jpg|thumb|He has come here to kick autistic ass and chew bubblegum...[[wikipedia:They Live|and he's all out of bubblegum]].]]
[[Image:ReggieAndChris.jpg|thumb|left|Separated at birth?]]

<div style="position:fixed; bottom:0; right:0">[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|right|JULAY!]]</div>

'''[[Reginald]] "Reggie" Fils-Aimé''' ({{IPA|[ˈfiːzɛmeɪ]}}), is the president of [[Nintendo]] of [[United States of America|America]] and colleague of [[Shigeru Miyamoto]]. He is also an opponent of "true love" and possibly a [[virgin with rage|virgin]], according to [[Chris]].

Chris's contact with Reggie formed the second stage of the [[Miyamoto Saga]], beginning after Chris failed to make it to Redmond and no-showed his planned face-to-face meeting with Miyamoto towards the end of [[January 2009]]. Never one to mince words, Reggie gave Chris a tough but fair assessment of his personal life and his potential as a top-flight [[video game]] designer. Chris reacted poorly, accusing Reggie of [[Kick the Autistic|discriminating against him]] because of his [[autism]], comparing him to [[Mary Lee Walsh]], and eventually throwing an unrestrained tantrum after Reggie bluntly told him that their collaboration was over.

Chris [[CWC Update 30 January 2009|threatened]] to take Reggie and Miyamoto to [[Charlottesville]] court before going back on his word and BAWWWWing to them in an [[CWC Update 31 January 2009|apology video]].

Reggie's next video game, ''[[Kick the Autistic]]'', will be released for the Wii U and the New 3DS XL sometime for Christmas. [[Jimmy Hill]], meanwhile, currently owns the European and Japanese gaming rights to Sonichu.

==Fils-Aimé Saga==
On 26 [[January 2009]], Chris released a [[CWC Update 26 January 2009|video]] wherein he claimed that he had been to [[Redmond]] to visit Shigeru Miyamoto and begin working on a [[The Sonichu Chronicles|Sonichu video game project]]. This, of course, was a [[lie]]. As a result of Chris's failure to make his appointment with Miyamoto, Reggie began communicating with Chris two days later, and their conversation continued through the first week or so of February.
{{clear}}

{{quoteboxred|'''Hi, it's me Reggie. President of Nintendo of America''' from '''Reggie Fils-Aimé''' to '''Chris''' on 28 January 2009 1:16 AM
----

But right now, I'm just strictly Reggie. I'm not going to even bother sending this through my Nintendo email address. Because you know what? This isn't business. This is strictly personal. I have something to say to you, and you need to listen. This has nothing to do with Nintendo right now, this is just me and you. Mano e mano. Man to man. I don't normally do this, but hell, I just need to get this off my chest.

If you don't know who I am, then allow me to introduce myself. My name is Reggie Fils-Aime. I've been kicking ass and taking names ever since the E3 expo at [[2004]] where I made my debut, where from then on I eventually earned my position as president of this company.

I'm known to be a loud mouth. I don't take crap from anyone. So if you are easily offended, I suggest you stop reading. But don't worry, I'll try to go easy on you, key word being "try" here.

But with that out of the way, I just want to say something to you personally.

May I kindly ask, what the hell is wrong with you? Are you for real or what? I was there for everything. I saw Miyamoto waiting for up to 2 days in the bitter cold for you to show up and you stood him up. I was even there trying to arrange everything for you, even setting up someone to escort you to our building complete with bodyguards and full security because I knew you were concerned about safety. And for what? So you could just NOT show up? I mean, I don't even know what to think, it's just completely unbelievable.

I'm sorry but it just is. I heard what you said to Mr Miyamoto too, your reasons for not coming. And I just have to say. How old are you? You're 27, if I'm not mistaken right?

27! I mean, think about it, you are almost 30! What is a man of your age still doing being coddled by his parents? Let me tell you, when I was about your age, I was already married and had children!

Your autism isn't an excuse either. I've raised a son with autism who is far worse functioning than you are and he can easily make his own decisions. The only thing I see here is a person who is not only lazy and makes excuses, but cannot even take charge of his own life.

That right there is what made it pretty clear that there is no chance in hell you're going to get anywhere with this project. Nevermind the fact that your parents didn't want you to go (or that you still have to get your parents permission at your age).

Think about what happened if you did go, and you had to ask mommy and daddy for an OK on everything? Imagine what a complete disaster that would be. I mean, listen. Simply put, you are not fit to do business with us as you are not even in a position where you can make your own decisions, which is vital to survive in the workplace, and even life in general.

I mean, seriously, who the hell were we talking to? I don't know about you. But this deal was about Nintendo and you. This was not the deal between Nintendo and the parents of Christian Weston Chandler.

I'm sorry, but provided that this whole thing you pulled on us wasn't an elaborate prank, this project was doomed from the start. It's just completely ridiculous. It is impossible for anyone to do business with someone who still has to rely on their parents to make their decisions.

Right now, I don't see how anything good could come from any of this. The only way I could even see this going anywhere is if you were to somehow learn to become independent, like a person of your age should be, and try to do something so that you don't rely on your parents to decide things for you.

But I don't see that happening ever in the near future (nor is it really my job to even have to tell you this). And because of that, I don't see how you'll ever be able to do business with us.

And you know what? I'll just leave it at that. Also, forget recieving a letter from us (and for what? So your parents can read it out loud to you? For Christ sake). This whole thing is through.

Our company will gladly deal with people who are up to the task. But we cannot waste valuable time and money on children who have no means of actually doing their part (their part, as in not their parents but "their part") to cooeprate with us.

Sorry for the rant, but you've wasted so much of our time, money and effort that I had to personally do what I'm known for, and that is kicking ass and taking names.

I always tell it like it is, and I'll be damned if I ever change that. So consider this as the final notice, this whole thing is through. It was through as soon as you made it clear that you are not mature enough to do business with us.

Other than that, I have nothing more to add. Please feel free to complain about me not being professional, I get that all the time. But nobody ever doubts my ability to tell people the things they need to hear. And what I just told you is nothing but that.

Sincerely,

The man who has been kicking ass and taking names since [[2004]].

Reggie Fils-Aime
<br>President
<br>Nintendo of America}}

{{quotebox|Well, it is good to make your acquaintance, Reggie. I have viewed your [[Wikipedia:Wii Music|WiiMusic]] Tip Video on my Wii recently, and your introduction basically expanded my knowledge of you personally. Allow me to offer my congratulations on you becoming President of N.O.A.; last I heard, from snail-mail exchange, y'all had a woman for a president (I can't recall her name at the moment), so for my knowledge now. :)

In response to your message, let me say that I deserved that; it was as shocking as Mr. Resetti in [[Animal Crossing]], but in the sense of personally expressing yourself, I mean the comparison as genuinely a positive compliment.

I feel Truly, Deepest Sorry for missing the appointment; I have made the mistake of not being clear in the fact of my being unable to make the trip, and trying to compensate with sending myself via snail-mail (in a sense). As much as it was due to the lack of support from my family, I Could Not afford the Travel Fare to [[Redmond]] in the first place. I am considered compusive with handling money, and since the first notice of the business between me and Mr. Miyamoto came up Mid-January, I felt like I was "[[Bob walks in|caught with my pants down]]". I had spent my last amount of money from [[Monthly tugboat|my Social]] that I get every month to pay rent to my family, make payments on my Credit Card Bills, and even after that, I would have had only a hundred or so left over, and I had already compulsively spent that on the day I got the money on a couple of games. I feel at fault for not controling my compulsiveness enough to save a hundred at a time months before.

Then there is the mixture of Ligitimate business e-mail, from you all for example, and e-mails from [[Internet]] [[Trolls]]/Bullies/[[Impostor]]s, and among the chaos and confusion, I felt out of sorts, even the moments when I felt calmed down after a time from the stress. And my mother and father felt at unease amongst that confusion as well. Even when I put it up to my friends at my church; the same thing; they thought I was talking to an impostor, posing as Mr. Miyamoto. But after I received the automated e-mail from donotreply@noa.nintendo.com verifying Mr. Miyamoto's e-mail address as legitimate, I felt MOST Confident that I was dealing with the real Miyamoto. And yet, even after presenting the printout of that e-mail, everyone was still in doubt.

I have made great effort to seek local aid to fund me for the trip to Redmond, but unfortunately, I failed. It was heavily advised that I have the business between me and Miyamoto hand-written on Paper sent to me to present to my Attorney. Also, considering the rumors were Flying Heavily among the Internet Troll Population, if I had made the trip, I felt I might have been heavily physically harmed by those [[Death threats|vicious people]].

I will not disagree with the accusations of my emotions. Even though my family are of Great Business Expierences (let me also mention that my father, Mr. [[Bob|Robert Franklin Chandler, Jr.]], while working at G.E. ([[Wikipedia:General Electric|General Electric]]) has designed the Controls for the Plastic Molding Machines, so without him, we would not have anything Plastic as simple as a Funnel, or even the casing for the NES), I feel that I personally lack heavy business expierences that I would require. Due to my mental block, I feel that I would require someone to speak for me in the beginning of a Heavy amount of Business. They also gave me a small amount of the words that were typed to Mr. Miyamoto, especially the requests for the advance in travel fare so I could have made the trip. While [[Chris and money|I personally understand the economical situations]] prohibiting the advance, my family, as well as the Majority of my Church's Congregation, disagree. With that one bit of green absent from being advanced, it set the Ground for the locally popular disbelief in my talking to Mr. Miyamoto.

If I did have the money advanced to me for the trip, my [[Mother|escort]] and I would have Most Definitely made the flight.

Believe me, I have been feeling the worst stress from my being unable to afford the trip, my attempt to compensate with the CD-R and DVD-R failing badly, having to cover-up in online discussions for my family and local friends' HUGE concern for my safety and health, and worst of all the shame I feel from all the stress.

I sincerely meant no harm, hostile behavior, or anything major like that from the words I have spoken, written and typed so far in this business transaction.

I Truly Want to Continue with the Sonichu Projects, because I require a brighter future to set me in good standings with my future wife and my future daughter, [[Crystal Weston Chandler]] (God promised her to me in a multiple of [[Dreams]]). So, I respectfully ask you to NOT Cancel it. With the Paper Documents Snail-Mailed to me, my efforts to save money for the trip, convincing my family, friends and attorney, getting my act well-prepared and well-together, and my Female [[Sweetheart]] by my side (she's [[PandaHalo|on her way to me from Australia]]), I, [[Christian Weston Chandler]], will Truly Feel that I can Tackle the Project Head-On.

I appreciate your time and paitence, Reggie. And I have offered my deepest apologies to Mr. Miyamoto, as well as the Powerpoint Project and my [[CADD]] Plans for the [[Cwcville Shopping Center]] in two e-mails just recently.

Peace and Best Wishes,<br>
Christian Weston Chandler<br>
[[14 Branchland Ct.]]<br>
[[Ruckersville]], [[Virginia|VA]] 22968-9545<br>
(434)-990-0198<br>
Wii Number: 8626-5211-8387-4771 (Wii-Speak Capable)<br>
[[PSN]] ID: Sonichu ([[PSEye]] Capable)}}

{{quoteboxred|Listen, kid. I apologize for yelling at you, but if you know me, I am a guy who doesn't pull his punches. Let me tell you. They call me the most feared man in the game's industry, the "man who kicks ass and takes names." That Mr. Resetti comparison was kind of accurate actually. I guess I do deserve that title.

But I just have to be honest with you. I don't think you're ready for any of this. You seem to have a lot of issues in your life that you need to take care of before you can do business with anyone. I think right now Nintendo is the LEAST of your worries.

I mean, compulsive spending, severe paranoia, friends and family who do not trust you, you having to get their permission to do anything despite almost being 30, relying on social security and taxpayer money to survive, and the list goes on and on.

I'm sure if you had a job, didn't live with your parents, and were a self made man like a person of your age ought to be, you'd have no problem making it here.

But from what you're telling me, you've got a lot of issues and things to take care of in your life before you could ever reach such a state, and I wonder right now if I'm asking for the impossible right now.

Until then, I don't see how this could go anywhere. We've wasted so much time and money on this project only to find out that the man we're dealing with still is being coddled by his parents and doesn't even have a job or money of his own (taxpayer social security money issued to you for food/clothing doesn't count, which you shouldn't be spending on games anyway) or anything of that sort to even come through with this.

That is why I'm so frustrated with any of this. It's just so ridiculous. I've never seen anything like it. I thought we were dealing with a grown man, a self made man who could make his own decisions and come through with this. But what you've shown us is anything but that.

Sort out your own life first. Don't worry about Nintendo. Maybe once you finally grow up to be independent, sort out all the things preventing you from coming, and maybe even be able to make your own decisions and in life, then maybe at that point we'll be able to do business with each other.

But until then, I doubt we'll see anything come out of this. And even if it does work out at the moment, I can't imagine you being anything other than a huge liability for us. Being an independent person who can make his or her own decisions is paramount to survive in the business world, especially in the games industry. We don't have time to babysit you. While it may seem like all fun and games, this is a business for adults, not people who still depend on their parents to survive.

Sincerely,<br>
Reggie Fils-Aime}}

{{quotebox|I understand what you're telling me, Reggie.

But with statements like, " this is a business for adults, not people who still depend on their parents to survive," it makes me feel like I am being [[Kick the Autistic|discriminated against]]. I'm not one to judge, and I am capable of making my own [[The MovingFoward videos|sound decisions]] [[Attraction sign|in life]] [[Recycling|when it comes]] [[List of places that have banned Chris|down to it]]. My mind kinda rolled along with the moment, but the point is the discriminating statement pretty much.

Peace,<br>
Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|Yeah, but you have to understand. I don't understand how you're going to do anything, when you don't even have your own life sorted out.

You're not being discriminated against. I'm just saying that you're clearly not cut out for this. How can you expect to lead a project when you cannot even lead your own life?

You have problems with your family, you depend on social security (which you use for games instead of your own needs), you seem to be completely paranoid and above all else, I don't see you making a single sound decision on your own. It seems to be that you're still being raised by your parents. We were under the impression that we were making a deal with an accomplished comic book artist, but instead you show us that you're inconsiderate, you lack any sort of independence or maturity, and above all else, you seem like the kind of person that would be a liability for our company.

To me, it doesn't seem like you need a video game. It seems like you need to sort out your own life before you try to get involved with something like this, which to me, you don't seem to be cut out for at all.

Mr. Miyamoto has requested that I let him talk to you and that I try to hold back and be a bit more polite, but even he admits that it is very hard considering all you've made us go through recently.

I have very little hope for this project at this point and I don't see what the hell is the point of doing any of this anymore. This is a bridge to nowhere. I'm going to either have to decide to step in and stop it myself, or either that just sit back and watch it fail anyway since I don't see how this has any chance of becoming anything.

Sincerely,<br>
Reggie Fils-Aime}}

{{quotebox|'''Re: Hi, it's me Reggie. President of Nintendo of America'''
----

I see your point, Reggie, but YOU DID NOT HAVE TO CANCEL THE PROJECT INDEFINITELY! I mean, after I get things settled on my end, and when I have the [[monthly tugboat|funds]] to make the trip to Redmond, it would feel much beneficial to me to know that the Window is still OPEN for me. What I'm hearing here is that you've CLOSED the Window and sealed it with Concrete!

[[Chris and negotiation|I WILL NOT ACCEPT THAT!]]

I apologize for coming off strong, but the objectionable feeling is True to me at the moment, and I would appreciate it if you would Re-Open the Window for me, and UNSEAL the Window, so I can still have the opportunity open for me. I will need a financial setting with a good job for when I have my family and individuality set, and I personally feel it BEST if I still had the opportunity to Work with Nintendo and [[Sega]] to bring my Sonichu and [[Rosechu]] to life in the Video Game World.

Please let me know that this Same Window of Opportunity will remain open for me. And if it helps better my case, I recently won a 400 dollar [[Gamestop]] Gift Card from the [[Guitar Hero Be A Star Sweepstakes]] and received it in the FedEx; I spent 3/4 of the card on my Church's Congregation, and those who requested a game from the card; the Majority of them asked for Wii Titles; Two asked for WiiMusic, and one of those two also got a copy of Animal Crossing City Folk With the WiiSpeak. And I ended using the rest for myself on Super Mario Galaxy, WiiMusic, LoZ: Twilight Princess, [[Sonic]] Riders: Zero Gravity, ALL FOR NINTENDO Wii, and a WiiSpeak. And I still have a [[TRUE and LOYAL fanbase|HEAVY Positive and Loyal Sonichu and Rosechu Fanbase;]] You All at Nintendo will STILL be able to Gain More Money off of my Sonichu and Rosechu, especially when in the near future I will be most capable of flying to Redmond, meet with you and Mr. Miyamoto, and get this "Mario Party" Started.

Please reply with your contact information, including phone number, so I can contact you in the near future, when I TRULY WILL be ready. My Mind is SET on this, and I feel I can be Ready as early as the end of [[2009]]. You have my word as an Avid Gamer, [[Chris and Religion#Delusions of Godhood?|Lamb of God]], and Humble Human Being that I WILL work Very Hard to Save, Save, Save.

Peace,<br>
Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|'''RE: Hi, it's me Reggie. President of Nintendo of America'''
----

We're not interested in your project. I've seen [[Sonichu Powerpoint|the powerpoint]]. Apart from the fact that you are unable to manage for yourself, the powerpoint really was the final straw. It was filled with gratuitous and shameless drawings with every other frame showing some form of partial nudity or characters making out with each other.

I cannot even fathom how you managed to think that would be a good idea.

Not only that, you keep mentioning [[Sony]], which you should know is the bitter rival of Nintendo and our mortal enemy. I don't know if you've been paying attention, but in every presentation I have given, whenever I mention kicking some behind, it's always directed to Sony. If you knew anything about our company, that would have been completely obvious.

But those are all moot points compared to the fact that you have demonstrated that you are not cut out for this kind of work and that your actions and mode of behavior would be a total liability for our company.

This decision is final. We are not going to do business with you and that is all. Sort out your own life. We cannot help you.

This is it. Do not email me or beg me for anything else. This is final. I cannot stress that enough. And if you do email me again, I will just repeat myself over and over. This whole thing is over. Goodbye.

Sincerely,<br>
Reggie Fils-Aime}}

{{quotebox|'''Please DO NOT Pigeonhole Me or Sonichu'''
----

The LAST thing I need to feel is feeling like I've been Left within a tiny piece of shelfspace to collect dust and be forgotten.

Peace,<br>
Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|'''RE: Please DO NOT Pigeonhole Me or Sonichu'''
----

Actually I think it's for the better. Maybe you can learn something out of this whole exchange.

But other than that, there is nothing more I can say or do for you. I'd appreciate it if you stopped emailing me now and maybe instead took some time to reflect on how this went wrong on your part. But this whole thing is finalized and done, and I cannot help you nor do I have the time to keep sending you emails when we have no official business with each other.}}

{{quotebox|'''One last thing'''
----

I still would deeply appreciate a document of the past business words, aggrements and all that from between me, Mr. [[Miyamoto]] and you, Reggie, snail-mailed to my home address I've previously provided to you, for my personal records and future references, Please.

Peace,<br>
Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|'''RE: One last thing'''
----

It's not going to happen, pal. This is final. Don't take this personally.}}

{{quotebox|'''"Reply to your Reply"'''
----

Let me just say a few more things, and then I'll stop e-mailing you for a long while. There was Positively NO NUDITY at all in the Powerpoint Presentation. And What the heck is WRONG with True [[Love]] and Kissing? [[Christian Weston Chandler|Are you a Virgin yourself? Have you had a BUNCH of Bad Dates? Or are you soo Closed-Minded and Rednecked?]] I gave you respect after seeing you in that video on my Wii, yet you tell me that True Love is WRONG? You are just as bad or WORSE than the [[Mary Lee Walsh|Real-Life Mary Lee Walsh]], or as she is known as in the [[Comic]]s now, Slaweel Ryam.

I pity you if you've had your share of Bad Luck in True Love, yet at this point, you have just Lost My Respect.

True Love is a Truly Sacred Bond between WOMAN and MAN, and when they are together, they get attracted to each other very much to Kiss and later Make Love. [[Chris and Religion|GOD and JESUS WANTS US ALL TO EXPERIENCE and SHARE True, Straight LOVE!]] THERE IS NOTHING OBJECTIONABLE FROM THAT! I am a man who stand for [[China|True Love and Honesty]], in comics AND in Real Life, although I am still a Frustrated [[Virgin with Rage|Virgin with Autisim]] on the side. [[Chris and his Ego|AT LEAST I AM MAKING A POSITIVE DIFFERENCE IN KEEPING TRUE LOVE BETWEEN ONLY WOMAN AND MAN IN MY ACTIONS.]] On a Side-Note, I DESPISE ALL [[homos|HOMOSEXUAL MALES,]] PERIOD!

ALSO, I BET YOU PROBABLY [[Tobacky|SMOKE]] AND [[Chris and Hypocrisy|DRINK]], don't you? I SPEAK AGAINST THOSE AS WELL SINCE THEY ARE TOOLS TO SPEED YOU TO [[Chris and Death|DEATH]] WITH [[Chris and Health|CANCER,]] LIVER PROBLEMS, BAR FIGHTS AND AUTOMOBILE ACCIDENTS. GIVE UP THE HABITS! THEY ARE BEYOND [[rule 34|GROSS]] AND [[nudes|DISGUSTING!]]

<nowiki>*sigh*</nowiki>

Forgive me for raising my voice very loudly, but to ENCOURAGE the True, Straight Love that you obviously OBJECT, I felt it was Required and Necessary. [[Random Access Humour|I can be a "Resetti" too, Mr. Resetti.]]

Peace-Out,<br>
Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|There wasn't. I never said there was. You assume too much and are way too paranoid about things, this is why I don't want to deal with you. Imagine if you were to flip out on someone while in the workplace like this? It'd be a complete PR disaster.

But I never said nudity or implied anything about your characters sexual preferences.

What I was referring to what the panty shot of Rosechu in one of the first frames. Then you show two characters in bed making love to each other.

Just what the hell kind of game did you want Nintendo to make?

Nintendo has always been in the business of making games for the whole family. That includes children. That is why you need to check yourself before you wreck yourself, and you've shown that you're unable to do so.

Your mind seems too wired on other things. Your head seems to be in the clouds and you don't even know the first thing about being appropriate or tasteful. Did you think this game proposal would even be able to pass through the [[Wikipedia:Entertainment Software Rating Board|ESRB]]?

You know nothing about how the industry works. About things such as company reputation, age appropriate content or content that won't get shot down by the ESRB (look at the whole "[[Wikipedia:Hot Coffee minigame controversy|Hot Coffee]]" GTA scandal for example). You just think you can do whatever you want and hope it flies.

Also from what I recall, you sent drawn pornography drawn in colored pencil/marker to Mr. Miyamoto TWICE. Imagine if you did this to someone in a business situation. Do you want me to hire you when you are such a loose cannon?

It's not possible. I can't risk having such a huge liability. And in fact, your behavior is the reason I've decided to remove you indefinitely from Nintendo, and I hope that someday you get your act together (which I don't see happening any time soon).

But until then, this project is over and gone for good. If anything was the last straw, it was this email. I don't have time to fight with you, you are completely unstable, irresponsible and the kind of person who would probably flip out or even hurt someone if he were to put in the workplace.

I'm glad you made that video and cleared everything up. But now, just leave me alone. I'm not going to even bother replying back after this, or if you keep this up.

Also, by the way. You didn't spell your name right at the end of the power point. You wrote it as "ChriSTAIN." That would be grounds for any potential employer to not hire someone. In addition to the behavior you've just displayed and the type of proposal you tried to make, the last thing we need is someone who can't even spell his own name.

Sincerely,<br>
Reggie Fils-Aime}}

{{quotebox|Well, the game would not Constantly revolve around the Background Romance; it's called a "Happy Ending".

Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|It's not something you show in a business proposal. There is a time and place for everything. But I don't understand why I have to tell this to you.

Either way, it's all over now and I don't want to deal with you anymore. I hope that someday someone takes you to seek consoling or behavioral therapy, and that you someday are able to manage on your own, because I don't have time to listen or try to help you as that is not my job.

Please leave me alone and I hope for the best.

Sincerely,<br>
Reggie Fils-Aime}}

{{quoteboxred|No means No, Chris.

Yeah, I saw your latest video there. I still don't think you get it.

The project cancellation was already signed into effect. There is nothing that can be done now. It is over.

You have no excuses. Your autism is not an excuse.

In fact, I cannot believe you for saying that. You continue to use your autism as a crutch and then continue to blame everything on it.

STOP!

Let me tell you right now, there is a difference between autism and pure irresponsibility/laziness. You are the latter, my friend, not the former.

Didn't I tell you that I once raised a son with autism? He had it much worse than you did. But guess what? He has a job, he is going to [[college]], and he sure as hell doesn't live in my house. He is able to manage for himself and I NEVER have to make any of his decisions for him.

What is the difference between you and him? I'll tell you, my son isn't lazy. He doesn't expect everyone just to give him everything. He knows that if he wants something, he has to work for it. And when he messes up, he doesn't blame his autism or people on the internet or anything else, he is able to know when he messed up and he takes responsibility for his own actions. And as a result he is a much better person for it.

You even try to blame me for "discriminating." That's complete malarkey. I've employed several people with autism, and even worse disabilities than you have.

But the thing is, those people are hard working and responsible. They want to work hard and they don't expect me to hold their hand and give them everything. And for one thing, they sure as hell don't still live with their parents at the age of 27.

You have demonstrated that you cannot get your act together and that you always want to put the blame on something else, whether it's autism, or even other people.

Pardon my [[Wikipedia:French language|french]], but that's bullshit. And whether you like it or not, that shit will never fly with me. That is why I am not going to have any part in your project and you're not going to be hired by us.

There is no excuse for your actions. You can give whatever excuse you want, but in the end it all comes down to you. Either learn how to take blame for yourself for when you mess up or don't even bother.

But either way, I want nothing to do with you because you've done so much to make me angry that I don't even know why I am still talking to you anymore. Just put a lid on it and go away.

Sincerely,<br>
Reggie Fils-Aime}}

{{quotebox|You can blame my constant NON-Acceptance of Cancelation to my [[Slow-in-the-mind|Red-Necked Personality Trait]] I picked up from my [[mother]].

I will NEVER accept a Cancel on the Project; it's Pigeonhole until I can make it or Continuation ONLY.

And, for the last time, I AM NOT LAZY!

Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|Accept it, because it already happened and now you're just wasting my time.}}

{{quoteboxred|Also stop blaming other people (or anything else) for your things that are your own fault. Taking responsibility for your actions is the first step to becoming a mature, more independant ''[sic]'' person who can manage for himself. You are acting like a spoiled little child right now.

And yes, not wanting to admit that you did anything wrong or always putting the blame on someone else so you don't have to take responsibility for it is indeed a sign of laziness and immaturity.

But why am I telling you this? It's useless. I can't seem to get through to you. You never even listen. Whatever I say goes from one ear out the other as you try to make up yet another excuse, over and over again.

There is no excuse you can make now though. The project was canceled and has been canceled indefinitely for a while now.

I am not going to even bother replying after this. Make up whatever excuse you want, resort to your same BS and blame everyone else but yourself, I don't care anymore.}}

{{quotebox|Well, I WILL continue to Haunt, Pester and Bother you until the project becomes Uncancelled and Shelved for until I AM ABLE to make the trip. I will Haunt Your [[Dreams]], with [[God]] by my side helping me to do that.

And if you do not like it, well I Triple-[[Patti Chandler|Dog]] Dare you AND Mr. Miyamoto to come to my house in [[Virginia]] Yourselves, talk to me and my family, and settle the matter like it should have been, have I been able to AFFORD to make the trip in the first place. Or, you all can very well bring me, my family and friends to [[Charlottesville|Charlotesville]], Virginia Court to settle this under a court of law. I have a SLEW of friends and family who will help me in court, and even define my own personal character as a humble human being.

Peace,<br>
Christian Weston Chandler.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dare us? That doesn't make any sense. Why should we come to your house? For one, we have no business with you now, and even if we did, you'd still have to make an appointment and come to our office.

But it's too late for that. We've already found someone who knows how to take responsibility for himself and conduct himself in an appropriate matter, and we're giving the project over to him.

He calls himself [[Clyde Cash]]. He's a real stand up guy. Unlike you, he took the initiative to not only to schedule an appointment with us and arrive on time (exactly on time, right at the very second), but also showed us the utmost respect and humility. Not once did he ever lash out at us, or harass us like you have done so far.

Not only that, he showed us that he can take care of himself, he has the leadership qualities we look for in an employee of this company.

He is a self made man with a honest hard working job, two degrees in things actually relevant to our business (one in game design, the other in fine arts, both from prestigious universities, and apparently he has degrees in many other things, he's a real a jack of all trades) and he even plans on getting married and having a child soon (he showed me a picture of him standing together with his future wife, [[Sarah]]. They make a good couple).

I don't understand why you couldn't be more like this guy? I mean, he came here on time, he didn't even have to beg us for money (and he even refused our offer to reimburse him), he is independent and lives on his own (you'll never see him ask his "mommy and daddy" for anything) and above all else, he's just all around a great guy who knows how to get things done and kick ass and take names.

I mean, couldn't you at least be half the guy this guy is? Is that too much to ask? But it doesn't matter now, we've finally found the guy we're looking for and you're not needed anymore.

Anyway, I look forward to working with our new business partner (and now, employee, as I have promoted him to a senior game designer position) and I can't wait start working with him on this project.

Be on the lookout for it, because this is going to be good, very good, even better than anything you offered us, and honestly better than anything we've ever seen. This Cylde Cash guy, he's brilliant. I'm thinking he could easily become the next Miyamoto, or even better. But yeah, this is going to be good.

Even though you'll have no part in this, I'm sure you'll still be able to enjoy it once it comes out because something this good, I mean, it would be downright stupid to want to miss something like this. It's going to be amazing.

Sincerely,<br>
Reggie Fils-Aime}}

{{quotebox|Clyde is NOT stealing my [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]], is he?}}

{{quoteboxred|Sorry that's classified information.}}

{{quoteboxred|Dear Chris,

We sent a letter to you. I'm sure you heard from a man named Mike Chandler by now. It's true, Mr. Miyamoto no longer has an appointment scheduled with you, nor will we acknowledge any longer that he had any correspondence with you anymore. The project is dead and buried and all [[Nintendo]] employees have been told to never acknowledge that the project ever existed.<br>
I already told you before that the project was canceled due to your inaction. We will not accept any more unsolicited game suggestions or business requests from you. As we mentioned, Mr. Miyamoto does make occasional business trips to the U.S. (and your previous appointment, which has expired and been erased from memory, was one of those trips), but for now he is back in Japan where he usually spends the majority of his time.

Now that you have received the letter, consider the cancellation official. It was nice doing business with you, but we will not make any games or take any ideas you have into consideration nor will we make Sonichu the game or anything related to it.

Sincerely,<br>
Reggie Fils-Aime<br>
President<br>
Nintendo of America, Inc.}}

{{quotebox|And it is Official that YOU, Sir ARE an IMPOSTOR. You blatently croped and copied a piece of the letterhead from the letter I've uploaded onto my server, and you have obviously forged that signature.

I am Ceasing my contact with you at Your current E-mail address, as well as "Mr. Miyamoto"'s E-mail address, because You BOTH were IMPOSTOROUS [[trolls|TROLLS]]. So you can QUIT your Cherade, you bastards.

Christian C.}}

==See also==

* [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 30th, 2009]]
* [[Captain's Log, Stardate January 31st, 2009]]
* [[The Sonichu Chronicles]]

==External links==
*[[Wikipedia:Reggie Fils-Aime|Wikipedia article on Reggie Fils-Aimé]]

{{People}}
{{DEFAULTSORT:Fils-Aimé, Reggie}}

[[Category:Trolls]]
[[Category:Video Games]]
[[Category: Miyamoto Saga]]

Time Void

2017-09-22T15:31:43Z

Heather Dalley Wallflower Confirmed:

[[Image:TimeVoid.jpg|center| OH GOD. I CAN SEE FOREVER! 8U]]

<div style="position:fixed; bottom:0; right:0">[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|right|JULAY!]]</div>

{{quote|He who fights with [[Trolls|monsters]] should look to it that he himself does not become a [[Sonichu|monster]]. And when you gaze long into an abyss the abyss also gazes into you.|[[Wikipedia:Friedrich Nietzsche|Friedrich Nietzsche]], ''[[Wikipedia:Beyond Good and Evil|Beyond Good and Evil]]''}}

[[Image:CWCVoid02.jpg|thumb|Chris, being flung down the taut cavity of time.]]

The '''Time Void''' (also known as the Void of Time, [[Little Pig Blanket]], or the [[PSN#PlayStation Network|Playstation Network]]) is a plot device in the [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'' canon]], devised by [[Chris]] as a method of stepping out of the comics.

==Gotta go back in time==
Chris, actually acknowledging the criticisms from [[trolls|fans]] that the ''Sonichu'' comic had become focused more on Chris and his [[Love Quest]] and less on the titular character who zaps to the extreme, decided to send his [[Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)|comic persona]] into a limbo.
{{quote|In space, no one can hear you scream, in time you are heard to infinity..."|Inspirational comments by our autistic hero (probably oblivious to the ''[[Wikipedia:Alien (film)|Alien]]'' reference) during CWC's ''time-out'' in the Void}}

===Time Hogs===

[[Image:CWCVoid01.jpg|thumb|Trippin' balls ''through time'']]

Enter [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]] - Two of the Sonichu Balls are activated during an adventure through the time stream which disrupts [[Magi-Chan]]'s shield, and exiles Chris from time. Sonichu and Magi-Chan realize Captain [[Chris and Fashion|Clownshirt]] is missing, but don't have any significant solutions to help him. Christian, meanwhile, attempts to sound sincere and empathetic while prattling on with his falsely-remorseful soliloquy in the Time Void. Narration reveals that the Void was in fact [[God]]'s "''twist of fate that would force me into a long, emotional, forced, stressful hiatus''"<ref>[[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]]</ref>

[[Image:CWCVoid03.jpg|thumb|Christian straining himself while attempting to decipher how other people's feelings are affected by his actions]]

==Wait, haven't I seen this before?==

A stripe-shirted goldbricker taken out of the storyline? It sounds familiar because ''it is''! This is essentially the same scenario as [[Mary Lee Walsh]]'s [[Dark Mirror Hole]], and the fate of [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|Crystal]]. The difference in this situation is that, despite being stranded between time, Chris is able to deliver endless [[Autism|neurotic]] thought bubbles and has the ability to absorb the Sonichu Balls (with an unknown result).

In appearance, the Void also shares a common design with the Dark Mirror Hole: a solid marker color. The Time Void gets a little more page space, but that's expected in order to fit all the words coming out of the autistic warrior's TRUE and HONEST mind.

==Impact==

Christian didn't quite leave the pages of his comic so quickly, and popped up in a backseat role:
* He attacks 4-cent_garbage.com employees during the [[Sonichu 8#The_Elevator_Gags|Elevator Gags of ''Sonichu'' #8]]
* He also appears through the [[Sonichu 9|power of GOD]] to seduce Ivy during [[Dating education|Date Ed]].

Note that these are simply self-indulgent cameos for the author. The Ivy encounter ''was'' intended to further the Love Quest sub-plot turned major story arc, although it's unlikely this will be revisited due to her [[Ivy#Epilogue|demise]].

[[Image:CWCLogo.png|left|Two 'C' quarters plus a 'W' quarter are equal to one full Dumbass]]

'''CWCVille at Large'''

[[Allison Amber]] acts as the Vice-Mayor, and carries out all of the mayoral duties of CWCville while Christian is ''persona in absentia''. Readers are not informed towards any civic news under Ms. Amber's tenure.

{{clear}}

[[Image:GiggitySchu.png|left|"Too bad the regular size ones break easily on my 7-incher"]]
'''The [[Christian_and_the_Hedgehog_Boys_(band)|Hedgehog Boys]] (and Girls)'''<br />
Chris is basically forgotten by the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon so that they can focus on sex and dating. In addition, the fight sequences in Christian's absence no longer showcase the Jerkops. The presence of the Creator, however, is still conveyed even without an active role as he has his pussy whipped titular character ramble on with an incoherent bigoted screed in [[Sonichu 9#Episode 20|Episode 20]]. In other words, Sonichu goes back to serving as a Mary Sue proxy for Chris.
{{clear}}

==Return from the Void==
[[Image:NextBookVoid.jpg|center|*Sound of crickets chirping*]]
<div align="center">''Sure, whatever you say.''</div>

Chris explains that he returned from the Different Dimension on 08 [[August 2008]]<ref>[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Billy_mays Billy Mays article on CWCipedia]</ref> - but this doesn't make sense ('''SURPRISE!''') since it would mean he has been back in CWCVille, as mayor, for at least a year. It was previously hinted that CWC would be returning for the end of "first season" (For [[Sonichu 9]]), and is still featured as Chris-Chan Sonichu in the preview for [[Sonichu_10|Issue 10]].

The question remains, "How does he escape the Time Void?".

{{quote|Fifteen minutes of dialogue, and a transformation later...|Chris pulling himself out of the Void for no real reason}}

In an anti-climatic move and almost as an after-thought, Chris pulls himself out of the Void with the help of [[Magi-Chan]], and [[Wild Sonichu]]'s vine whip power. During the epilogue, both Pokémon just happen to walk nearby the void, which appears right out of the blue, and they decide to rescue their "Master". Magi-Chan uses Wild Sonichu's whip as a safety cord and jumps in the Time Void's [[dirty crapped briefs|loose "Sphincter"]]. After many unexplained adventures lasting less than a whole minute, Chris is finally released from the grip of the Time Void's bowels.<ref>[[Sonichu 9|Sonichu Issue 9]]</ref> This page is followed by another claiming that, from now on, he will be able to tell more stories of ([[Chris and his Ego|himself and]]) Sonichu and Rosechu.

'''...Wait, there's more!'''
{{quote|She mistook me for myself and we went home. I was late getting home from work that night, so Lovely and I did the do and it was awesome!|Chris lying to his own wife in the future for a shag.}}

As if this wasn't enough, Chris seems to have exited the Time Void, by himself, in 2015. Over there, he took part of a "Medical Study". We are sure that said research wasn't in the field of behavioral studies or psycho-pathologies, since Chris came back just as twisted as when he left. When he was on the future, he lied to his own future wife, the "Lovely and Hot" [[Lovely Weather]] (an unfortunate woman with an equally unfortunate name) by passing himself for his own Future-Self. Hidden behind this lie, he seduced her and had sexual intercourse with her. Unaware of the [[rape|ethical issues]] related to lying to his own future wife for sex, he merely called it awesome.<ref>[[Sonichu 10]]</ref>

In short: Chris was stuck in the Time Void except for raping his future wife behind the back of his own future-self or punching an employee of 4-Cent_garbage for making a caricature of him.

==See also==
*[[Dark Mirror Hole]]

==References==
<references />
{{CWCverse}}
{{Sonichu}}
[[Category:Plot Devices]]

Unban contracts

2017-09-22T15:31:03Z

Heather Dalley Wallflower Confirmed:

[[File:CWCLuther2 - credit to Here to Lurk.png|thumb|Artist's depiction]]

<div style="position:fixed; bottom:0; right:0">[[Image:JULAY-small.gif|right|JULAY!]]</div>

In [[October 2016]], Chris visited some of the stores at which he is banned and asked the management to sign a contract to unban him. The documents were leaked to [[Kiwi Farms]] on 13 October.<ref>[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/unban-me-contracts-fall-2016.24994/]</ref>

Chris's attitude to bans appears to have remained the same [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|as his reaction]] to his ban from the [[GAMe PLACe]] nearly a decade earlier, using ridiculous [[negotiation]] tactics to tackle bans that he just cannot get over. These documents are also a big example of his [[Chris and his Ego|egotistical nature]] and [[Sonic Boom Protests|deteriorating]] [[Un-clit 2.0|sense]] [[Subliminal Frequency Hypnosis|of]] [[Chris and reality|reality]] post-[[Tomgirl]], believing that businesses (that'll be better without his patronage) will sign a legal document that will unban him and prevent them from being able to call the [[JERKOPS|police]] against him (which is illegal since contracts cannot be used to protect from [[Chris and the Law|criminal prosecution]], thus making it null and void), all because a violent, egotistical lolcow believes that not signing would prove that that they are "most uncompassionate and lacking of heart and soul of any person", and are a bunch of "unwelcoming immature rat -a**" b*****", comparing them to [[Pmurt|Donald Trump]]. He also believes that the reasons that he was banned is now "outdated" (similar to how he tried to convince [[Michael Snyder]] that he needs to "[[Chris and remorse|forgive]] [[Mary Lee Walsh|and]] [[Megan|forget]]"), and that the [[Chris in the media#New York Magazine|"Human Rights Campaign"]] would be on his side since he's now a "[[Tomgirl Saga|"L"esbian "T"ranswoman]]", the L and T from LGBTQ.

The reactions of the mentioned businesses to these letters are unknown, but are most likely just ignored.

==GameStop==
{{Quote|From the desk and [[Chris and reality|sound mind]] of<br>
Miss Christine Weston Chandler<br>
<br>|}}
Dearest Madam or Sir, who has pulled me over, if not the manager of this facility (you may relay this letter to said persecuting executive if applicable),

Firstly, in response to your immediate approach of my person with "purpose" to dispel me
from your store or facility for the following well -outdated reason, I present to you this document to counter said dispel or banning of my person.

The past, well-outdated matter of the protest of [[SEGA]]'s changing [[Sonic the Hedgehog]]'s [[Sonic Boom Protest|arm colour to blue from tan]], and my action of discouraging purchase of anything "Sonic Boom" from [[Gamestop]] has been realized to be of most trivial reason to protest, and the ending problems certainly do not justify the past means. I, Christine Weston Chandler, hereby promise never to do anything that I have done then ever again, and I do regret having done said actions.

This very action was [[2014|Two Years Ago]], and frankly, I believe and strongly feel that it is long beyond the time to Move Forward and Forgive and Forget the sordid affair. Failure to Forgive and Forget, on your part, only demonstrates that you, yourself, are a most uncompassionate and lacking of heart and soul of any person. And, thus, you are no better than [[Donald Trump]], who ONLY wants to make this country BROKE to pay his own petty debts and debtors, as well as fill the Corporate Fat Cats' Pockets; Not Caring or Leaving Any Money at all for us, you and I, Middle-Class People, who also harps on and again of "Proud" deeds against Race, as well as against the [[Homos|LGBTQ Community]]. Of which, l am of two of those letters, as l am a proud "L"esbian "T"ranswoman; the Human Rights Campaign would be on my side, regardless. He is a most uncouth and unwelcoming [[Christian Weston Chandler|immature]] rat-a** b****** , and to not forgive and forget, now, would see you as such as well, and [[Chris and reality|to dispel me is to discriminate against the LGBTQ community]] as well. But I digress.

I, personally, would like very much to put this vintage matter to rest, and leave both you and I with a mentally and emotionally peaceful day, versus a soul-crushing day. All I ask is that you lift your [[ban]] against me from this facility, and allow me to resume being welcomed here at mental and emotional peace; [[Chris and remorse|Forgive and Forget]]. Failure to do so would most tarnish further your facility's reputation; most unwelcoming.

To allow me to resume being and shopping here at peace, is to allow yourself and ease of mind and emotions as well.

Thank You.

And I do promise with my signature and date below to never again perform anything of the past misdeed under protest, nor feelings of bad emotions from after or during a bad day.

Sincerely,<br>
Miss Christine Weston Chandler

__________________ _________<br>
__________________ _________

<nowiki>*Signature and date of receiving this document</nowiki>

<nowiki>**Signing of this document also constitutes full legal binding of unbanning Miss Christine Weston Chandler from this store or facility, and to never call any police against her at any time hereafter.</nowiki>

==Best Buy==
From the desk and sound mind of<br>
Miss Christine Weston Chandler<br>
<br>
Dearest Madam or Sir, who has pulled me over, if not the manager of this facility (you may relay this letter to said persecuting executive if applicable),

Firstly, in response to your immediate approach of my person with "purpose" to dispel me from your store or facility for the following well-outdated reason, I present to you this document to counter said dispel or banning of my person.

The past, well-outdated matter of my possessing and using pepper spray against a person, who was never of employment at this Best Buy and thus dispelling and banning me from this Best Buy by sole reason of indirect news-hearing and gossiping, and no prior crimes, with such visual evidence, directly at this Best Buy, whatsoever, is no longer a valid reason whatsoever. I, Christine Weston Chandler hereby no longer possess pepper spray in any shape or form, and I promise never to use or possess it, even in self-defense of my person, and I do regret having done said actions, never at this Best Buy but at the original location whereas that has actually happened.

This very action was Two Years Ago, and frankly, I believe and strongly feel that it is long beyond the time to Move Forward and Forgive and Forget the sordid affair. Failure to Forgive and Forget, on your part, only demonstrates that you, yourself, are a most uncompassionate and lacking of heart and soul of any person. And, thus, you are no better than Donald Trump, who ONLY wants to make this country BROKE to pay his own petty debts and debtors, as well as fill the Corporate Fat Cats' Pockets; Not Caring or Leaving Any Money at all for us, you and I, Middle-Class People, who also harps on and again of "Proud" deeds against Race, as well as against the LGBTQ Community. Of which, I am of two of those letters, as I am a proud "L"esbian "T"ranswoman; the Human Rights Campaign would be on my side, regardless. He is a most uncouth and unwelcoming immature rat-a** b******, and to not forgive and forget, now, would see you as such as well, and to dispel me is to discriminate against the LGBTQ community as well. But I digress.

I, personally, would like very much to put this vintage matter to rest, and leave both you and I with a mentally and emotionally peaceful day, versus a soul-crushing day. All I ask is that you lift your ban against me from this facility, and allow me to resume being welcomed here at mental and emotional peace; Forgive and Forget. Failure to do so would most tarnish further your facility's reputation; most unwelcoming.

To allow me to resume being and shopping here at peace, is to allow yourself and ease of mind and emotions as well.

Thank You.

And I do promise with my signature and date below to never again perform anything of the past misdeed under protest, nor feelings of bad emotions from after or during a bad day.

Sincerely,<br>
Miss Christine Weston Chandler

__________________ _________<br>
__________________ _________

<nowiki>*Signature and date of receiving this document</nowiki>

<nowiki>**Signing of this document also constitutes full legal binding of unbanning Miss Christine Weston Chandler from this store or facility, and to never call any police against her at any time hereafter.</nowiki>

==Gallery==
<center><gallery>
File:Gamestop 01.jpg|Contract for GameStop
File:Gamestop 02.jpg
File:Best buy 01.jpg|Contract for Best Buy
File:Best buy 02.jpg
</gallery></center>

==See also==
*[[Apology Letters]] - Chris's 2014 attempt to convince Wal-Mart and Fashion Square Mall to unban him.
*[[GameStop]]
*[[Best Buy]]
*[[Chris and negotiation]]

==References==
<references/>

{{Relics of Fail}}