CWCki - User contributions [en]

100 2270

2010-10-07T22:57:06Z

Homeless prophet: fixed some transcript inaccuracies

'''100 2270''' is one of three videos [[Chris]] uploaded on 7 [[October 2010]].

{{-}}
==Video==
{{Infobox/video
| name = 100 2270
| video = {{#ev:youtube|l8ir2SbF5T4}}
| stardate = 7 [[October 2010]]

| saga = {{Jackie|text}}
| previous = [[100 2269]]
| next = Current
}}

=== Transcription ===

''[Odd voice]'' Eloeeh! Dis is Christian Weston Chandler 'ere! No, I'm not really Christian Weston Chandler, and I'm not the creator of Sonichu because I live in Philidelphia! I was born in Philidelphia! At least as far as I know. I don't have any originality, or [unintelligable] because I never put up a page for my show! In real life, I am only mocking new Christian Weston Chandler in Virginia, I said no, I am mocking Alec Benson Leary, I am pretending to be Alec Benson Leary, oh look at me I'm Alec, I draw teeeerrribly, I draw everything in squares, I put homosexual drawings in the background, I kill everybody! I put gore all over the place, I killed the real Christian Weston Chandler, I killed the second dude, who pretended to be the original! Anyway, [unintelligable], I live in Philidelphia, I have a girlfriend, her name is Kacey, except we're married now! And she coulda had the real Christian Weston Chandler, who lives in Virginia, except I'm just a Christian Chandler who lives in Philidelphia! Now I'm sorry, I didn't mean Philidelphia, I meant to say Pennsylvania! Pennsylvaniaa! But I pretended to be the original Christian Weston Chandler and rent movies from Blockbuster in Peennsylvaniaa! And the pogo, and attempts of the real deal, of the real man, in Virginia. Lalalalaallalalaallalalllllaaa!

''[Pause]''

Hey baby hit me one more time! I done it for my head! Bye now!

==See also==
*[[100 2267]]
*[[100 2269]]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2269]]|nextlink=Current}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Talk:The MovingFoward videos

2010-09-01T16:05:14Z

Homeless prophet:

<center>THIS IS NOT A SPECULATION PAGE --[[User:Cogsdev|Cogsdev]] 06:26, 30 August 2010 (PDT) </center>

{{Not A Forum}}
Transcribing this one presently... [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 17:27, 29 August 2010 (PDT)
:Done transcribing. Well, that was something you don't see every day. If anybody can catch what he says while he's setting down the camera in the first bit, please do add that... [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 17:54, 29 August 2010 (PDT)

What account did he upload this on?--[[User:Lylelash|Lylelash]] 17:42, 29 August 2010 (PDT)
*he didn't upload it, trolls did --[[User:Cogsdev|Cogsdev]] 17:42, 29 August 2010 (PDT)

The 'Trophy Unlocked: Killed the HEX-BOX!" has a certain delicious irony to it now. Maybe Chris deserves an Xbox 360 Achievement for 'killing' the PS3? [[User:Sakanz|Sakanz]] 19:17, 29 August 2010 (PDT)
:"Achievement Unlocked" Shoopfag request! --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 20:22, 29 August 2010 (PDT)
:: Done--[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 22:13, 29 August 2010 (PDT)
:::Many thanks! Is the misspelling intentional? --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 22:14, 29 August 2010 (PDT)
:::: Yeah in the moment i forgot how chris spelled Hex-box.--[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 22:22, 29 August 2010 (PDT)
:::::That wasn't the misspelling I was pointing to. --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 07:17, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
:::::: Fixed now, sorry, english is my second language.--[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 07:38, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
Random observations that probably should be put to appropriate articles: 1) ''"I mean no disrespect to Sony Computer Entertainment America. Maker of the fine product." ... "I bid you fond...faredoo. Adieu. Fond farewell..."'' If there ever was a proverbial smoking gun as to the fact that Chris just doesn't know what some phrases actually ''mean,'' this would be it. I mean, he failed at really meaning what he said to the sweethearts, and now he failed at really meaning what he said to his sweet fave electronics manufacturer. 2) ''"when I plugged it in, it did not turn on."'' Chris fails basic common-sense fire, electricity and possibly laser safety. If something is obviously FUBAR, you just ''don't'' plug it in, dammit. --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' <span style="font-size:smaller;">([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]])</span> 05:51, 30 August 2010 (PDT)

:That second one is a really good point, and I'm wondering where to make a note of it. Maybe just the article for the video, since we haven't got one for anything like "Chris and self-preservation." [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 09:29, 30 August 2010 (PDT)

Chris seems to have gone a little suicidal.. anyone else noticed?--[[User:MaHexBawx|MaHexBawx]] 17:25, 30 August 2010 (GMT)
:Don't get your hopes up. Chris is far too arrogant to commit suicide. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 10:35, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
I don't understand, does he intend to not play vidya anymore, at least on ps3, or did he destroy it because he wiped his hard drive? -[[User:Hellion|masta beta alum]] 12:47, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
:I'm gonna guess he destroyed it in a fit of internal tard rage. He'll make another video soon blaming the trolls for it's demise, and then proceed to buy another one. --[[User:MaHexBawx|MaHexBawx]] 1:03, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
:: Every time I think this fucking grand epic is over something happens it's maddening! --[[User:Wintermute|Wintermute]] 16:30, 30 August 2010 (PDT)`

==/v/ Is not an acceptable source of information==
Wow, this is terrible. /v/ is never ever ever a good source of information. You should know better. I really don't know how to handle the level of misinformation you guys are experiencing here. It's not as if any of the events leading up to Chris smashing the PS3 have been hidden from the public. There's really no excuse for this level of ignorance. You guys shouldn't be looking to 4chan for the latest Chris news, they are always the last to know and always the most misinformed. --[[User:Megaman|Megaman]] 06:05, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
:But it's correct information, but also, this isn't the place to be discussing it.--[[User:NasuGrave|NasuGrave]] 07:05, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
::It's correct in the same way that ED is right about Chris --[[User:Megaman|Megaman]] 07:10, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
:::Perhaps, then, this talk page (or the video page) is an appropriate place for a link to the location of the correct information? Remember, our job is to educate people about the CWC trainwreck. When people are ignorant, we can't assume it's because of a failing on their part; we have to make an effort to improve cwcki. Ignorance is not a sin, it's an opportunity to become educated.[[User:Sygerrik|Sygerrik]] 07:24, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
::::Again, not the right place to be talking about this. --[[User:NasuGrave|NasuGrave]] 07:47, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
::::*Actually this isn't a bad place to discuss it, as it does pertain to the article and how it should address Chris's motives (if any) for smashing his PS3. Stuff will be revealed in time, I'm sure.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 09:14, 30 August 2010 (PDT)--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 09:14, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
:::::Really, this isn't the place. People are watching this page. --[[User:NasuGrave|NasuGrave]] 13:06, 30 August 2010 (PDT)

==Leaked how?==
How do we have this? Was his computer hacked? Was it a private video to a [[Troll|trusted individual]]? Whether or not he knew this would eventually be public is kind of important, and I don't know where to find that. --[[User:Homeless prophet|Homeless prophet]] 09:33, 30 August 2010 (PDT)

:His computer was indeed hacked, and the only way to remove the bug is to format the hard drive and run the machine over with a car. --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 13:02, 30 August 2010 (PDT)

::Lulz. But seriously, what the fuck does "leaked" mean? Where did we get it, and for what audience did Chris intend it? It matters. If this wasn't meant for us to see, then it means that Chris is making an attempt at self-improvement here, an not an offering to satiate our bloodlust (as some contend). --[[User:Homeless prophet|Homeless prophet]] 21:37, 30 August 2010 (PDT)

:::If you don't know (yet), it's not your fucking business. Also welcome to CWCki. --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 23:33, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
::::Sonijew is 100% right, instead of asking, do a little investigation yourself. The answers aren't hard to find, and once you do figure out how/why, you'll see why it wasn't explicitly stated on the cwciki. Oh, and your next post better not be "But where do I start looking?" It's not exactly the secret of Jimmy Hoffa's body. --[[User:Megaman|Megaman]] 06:06, 31 August 2010 (PDT)

:::::Yeh, for what it's worth, it took about ten-fifteen minutes of browsing around for me to get a reasonably good idea of what's happening. Mind you, those fifteen minutes also reminded me why I don't read most of the forums in question on the regular... [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 09:00, 31 August 2010 (PDT)

::::Thanks for understanding, Megaman. --[[User:NasuGrave|NasuGrave]] 08:15, 31 August 2010 (PDT)

*I think in cases like this, while there is nothing wrong to ask these questions, it is helpful to appreciate the fact that Chris has done something bizarre in itself.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 15:25, 31 August 2010 (PDT)

You're right, the answers are very easy to find. Didn't mean to step on anyone's toes- this is literally the first time when Chris's intended audience is unclear and including that seemed like an obvious way to improve the article. --[[User:Homeless prophet|Homeless prophet]] 09:05, 1 September 2010 (PDT)

==Edited?==
anyone else notice that the video skips at 1:52? He claims the video is unedited, and thats believable since he doesn't edit videos at all. Did the person who made the compilation edit that part, or is that just a camera glitch. [[User:DrewPickles|DrewPickles]] 18:14, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
:It kinda just looks like it auto-adjusted white balance settings and such. Either that or Chris accidentally hit the record button when he was re-positioning it. I'm sure there's nothing significant about it. --[[User:KarryLing|KarryLing]] 21:29, 30 August 2010 (PDT)

==Chris's custom console...==
Occurs to me, has there ever been a decent picture taken of his PS3 with the CWC's Adult Chronicles art and such on it? It would go well in the gallery of his other abortions in the video games article. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 09:36, 31 August 2010 (PDT)

==Another sign of huge ego?==
not trying to start a discussion. but, anyone else think that this is worth mentioning that this is a sign of how big Chris ego is? he destroys the PS3 with his car. anyone else would sell the ps triple for cash (plus considering how much crap is on the system) but instead he destroyed it with his car. this kind of a"if i can't have it no one will!!"situations. i think this should be mention within the page as one of the reasons why he destroyed it. plus him destroying the ps3 is destroying tax payers money. also he kept the sonichu cover as a memento and destroying the ps3 shows he still think soinchu isn't one of the cause for all his hardships (tho that all on himself)--[[User:Blackcwc|Blackcwc]] 14:46, 31 August 2010 (PDT)

===SHUT THE FUCK UP===
--[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 15:21, 31 August 2010 (PDT)

Talk:The MovingFoward videos

2010-08-31T04:37:50Z

Homeless prophet:

<center>THIS IS NOT A SPECULATION PAGE --[[User:Cogsdev|Cogsdev]] 06:26, 30 August 2010 (PDT) </center>

{{Not A Forum}}
Transcribing this one presently... [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 17:27, 29 August 2010 (PDT)
:Done transcribing. Well, that was something you don't see every day. If anybody can catch what he says while he's setting down the camera in the first bit, please do add that... [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 17:54, 29 August 2010 (PDT)

What account did he upload this on?--[[User:Lylelash|Lylelash]] 17:42, 29 August 2010 (PDT)
*he didn't upload it, trolls did --[[User:Cogsdev|Cogsdev]] 17:42, 29 August 2010 (PDT)

The 'Trophy Unlocked: Killed the HEX-BOX!" has a certain delicious irony to it now. Maybe Chris deserves an Xbox 360 Achievement for 'killing' the PS3? [[User:Sakanz|Sakanz]] 19:17, 29 August 2010 (PDT)
:"Achievement Unlocked" Shoopfag request! --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 20:22, 29 August 2010 (PDT)
:: Done--[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 22:13, 29 August 2010 (PDT)
:::Many thanks! Is the misspelling intentional? --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 22:14, 29 August 2010 (PDT)
:::: Yeah in the moment i forgot how chris spelled Hex-box.--[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 22:22, 29 August 2010 (PDT)
:::::That wasn't the misspelling I was pointing to. --[[User:SeventhBase|Seventh]][[User Talk:SeventhBase|Base]] 07:17, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
:::::: Fixed now, sorry, english is my second language.--[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 07:38, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
Random observations that probably should be put to appropriate articles: 1) ''"I mean no disrespect to Sony Computer Entertainment America. Maker of the fine product." ... "I bid you fond...faredoo. Adieu. Fond farewell..."'' If there ever was a proverbial smoking gun as to the fact that Chris just doesn't know what some phrases actually ''mean,'' this would be it. I mean, he failed at really meaning what he said to the sweethearts, and now he failed at really meaning what he said to his sweet fave electronics manufacturer. 2) ''"when I plugged it in, it did not turn on."'' Chris fails basic common-sense fire, electricity and possibly laser safety. If something is obviously FUBAR, you just ''don't'' plug it in, dammit. --''[[User:Wwwwolf|wwwwolf]]'' <span style="font-size:smaller;">([[User talk:Wwwwolf|wake me when you need me]])</span> 05:51, 30 August 2010 (PDT)

:That second one is a really good point, and I'm wondering where to make a note of it. Maybe just the article for the video, since we haven't got one for anything like "Chris and self-preservation." [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 09:29, 30 August 2010 (PDT)

Chris seems to have gone a little suicidal.. anyone else noticed?--[[User:MaHexBawx|MaHexBawx]] 17:25, 30 August 2010 (GMT)
:Don't get your hopes up. Chris is far too arrogant to commit suicide. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 10:35, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
I don't understand, does he intend to not play vidya anymore, at least on ps3, or did he destroy it because he wiped his hard drive? -[[User:Hellion|masta beta alum]] 12:47, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
:I'm gonna guess he destroyed it in a fit of internal tard rage. He'll make another video soon blaming the trolls for it's demise, and then proceed to buy another one. --[[User:MaHexBawx|MaHexBawx]] 1:03, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
:: Every time I think this fucking grand epic is over something happens it's maddening! --[[User:Wintermute|Wintermute]] 16:30, 30 August 2010 (PDT)`

==/v/ Is not an acceptable source of information==
Wow, this is terrible. /v/ is never ever ever a good source of information. You should know better. I really don't know how to handle the level of misinformation you guys are experiencing here. It's not as if any of the events leading up to Chris smashing the PS3 have been hidden from the public. There's really no excuse for this level of ignorance. You guys shouldn't be looking to 4chan for the latest Chris news, they are always the last to know and always the most misinformed. --[[User:Megaman|Megaman]] 06:05, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
:But it's correct information, but also, this isn't the place to be discussing it.--[[User:NasuGrave|NasuGrave]] 07:05, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
::It's correct in the same way that ED is right about Chris --[[User:Megaman|Megaman]] 07:10, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
:::Perhaps, then, this talk page (or the video page) is an appropriate place for a link to the location of the correct information? Remember, our job is to educate people about the CWC trainwreck. When people are ignorant, we can't assume it's because of a failing on their part; we have to make an effort to improve cwcki. Ignorance is not a sin, it's an opportunity to become educated.[[User:Sygerrik|Sygerrik]] 07:24, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
::::Again, not the right place to be talking about this. --[[User:NasuGrave|NasuGrave]] 07:47, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
::::*Actually this isn't a bad place to discuss it, as it does pertain to the article and how it should address Chris's motives (if any) for smashing his PS3. Stuff will be revealed in time, I'm sure.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 09:14, 30 August 2010 (PDT)--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 09:14, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
:::::Really, this isn't the place. People are watching this page. --[[User:NasuGrave|NasuGrave]] 13:06, 30 August 2010 (PDT)

==Leaked how?==
How do we have this? Was his computer hacked? Was it a private video to a [[Troll|trusted individual]]? Whether or not he knew this would eventually be public is kind of important, and I don't know where to find that. --[[User:Homeless prophet|Homeless prophet]] 09:33, 30 August 2010 (PDT)

:His computer was indeed hacked, and the only way to remove the bug is to format the hard drive and run the machine over with a car. --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 13:02, 30 August 2010 (PDT)

::Lulz. But seriously, what the fuck does "leaked" mean? Where did we get it, and for what audience did Chris intend it? It matters. If this wasn't meant for us to see, then it means that Chris is making an attempt at self-improvement here, an not an offering to satiate our bloodlust (as some contend). --[[User:Homeless prophet|Homeless prophet]] 21:37, 30 August 2010 (PDT)

==Edited?==
anyone else notice that the video skips at 1:52? He claims the video is unedited, and thats believable since he doesn't edit videos at all. Did the person who made the compilation edit that part, or is that just a camera glitch. [[User:DrewPickles|DrewPickles]] 18:14, 30 August 2010 (PDT)
:It kinda just looks like it auto-adjusted white balance settings and such. Either that or Chris accidentally hit the record button when he was re-positioning it. I'm sure there's nothing significant about it. --[[User:KarryLing|KarryLing]] 21:29, 30 August 2010 (PDT)

Talk:The MovingFoward videos

2010-08-30T16:33:59Z

Homeless prophet:

Hello, Juffalo

2010-08-25T03:10:38Z

Homeless prophet: fixed broken link

"'''Hello, Juffalo'''" (or "'''Hello, Juffalo.MOV'''") is another video in which [[Chris]] fails at life, performing "Juggalo Family" by Dark Lotus and fucking up the lyrics constantly.

Chris tries hard to act like a [[Wikipedia:Juggalo|Juggalo]] by painting his face like a Sonichu-themed clown (note the rosy red cheeks) and imitating stereotypes of gangster subculture. He is close to having no flow, spending the majority of the time either mumbling the lyrics or not even reciting them at all. He also gives a shout-out to "[http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Juffalo Juffalos]", which is apparently a Juggalo term for superficial poseurs who don't understand the depth and complexity of clown-related rap music.

This is the second time [[Homos|Chris wore makeup]], with the first time being shown in [[War Paint Video]].

He dedicates this song to an unnamed [[gal pal]], whose influence likely explains the sudden influx of Chris-chan rap videos.

==Video==
<center>
{{Infobox/video
| name = Hello, Juffalo
| image = {{#ev:youtube|_YWgTHW2NAg}}
| imagewidth = 250
| Stardate = 18 December 2009
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Music.png]] Music [[Image:Galpals.png]] [[Gal pals]]
| Performance Style = [[Image:Crazy.png]] Crazy
| Shirt = {{StraightWhiteLinesShirt}} Straight White Lines
| previous = [[IPods Down and Listen Up]]
| next = [[20 December 2009]]
}}
</center>

===Transcript===

[[Captain's Log|Captain's Rockin' Log]], fans, and we're rockin 'it out loud with Juffalo family for my gal pal.

And you want to know if I'll trade ten Juggalos for a hundred mainstream fans, and I said, "I wouldn't trade ten Juggalos for a hundred thousand mainstream fans; ten Juggalos is priceless." I got love for my homies, members of the Lotus. United we stand, squashing all deadly fo-ces. Been to Hell, could've spent an eternity there. [[6 June 2010|All]] [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|the]] [[April 16 Fetish Vids|bad]] [[nudes|shit]] [[Megan|I]] [[Father Call|done]], I should still be there. Juggalos can ya feel me, worldwide, running with the hatchet straight out of Lotus Pod? Always got th' end screaming Juggalos [''indistinct, attempts to mumble lyrics''] Juggalos, Dark Lotus. Psychopathic, that's the way you go. They keep me going when I'm down and out. I pick phone up, drop them a line and hear them shout saying, "[''indistinct''] is the shit," until I'm down in the ground! I give a shout to all the [[homos]] and the [[china|chinas]] who keep me started. All my Juggalos always representing when departed.

[''mumbling stops, shouting begins''] [[Twin Falling Towers|Mass murder make me happy]]; [[Chris and death|dead bodies make me happy]]. Say what you will of me, I'll-always have a Juggalo family. Mass murder make me happy; dead bodies make me happy. Say what you will of me. I'll always have a Juggalo familaaaay!

Six individual pelt over and stiff. They try to ride away don't follow my chain..there's be a dirt filled grit and grind. Goodbye Juggalo..[''mumbles''] What's mine is yours. That's why I go to a dark carnival and show you a different world. [''mumbles'']-juggalo, hatchet! [[Homos|Tell 'em I'm gonna be sucking your dick!]] Bitch be psychopathic! On my iPod be living it all along..[''mumbles'']- of the sunlight! [''mumbles'']-for so many years that I question the love in my heart. I hate everyone and I hate everything. Except all the Juggalos and the love that they bring! I love ya!

Mass murder make me happy; dead bodies make me happy. Say what you will of me, I'll always have a Juggalo family. Mass murder make me happy; dead bodies make me happy. Say what you will of me, I'll always have a Juggalo family!

[''Chris struggles to keep up with the lyrics while ICP music is playing in the background'']—still be saggy, I wouldn't be fat; I'd still be hungry and crabby. We used to buy our own records at the stores, so they would think it was a hot seller, in other words. But we built a team of killers with the same dream, but we couldn't reach the top; we'd stay like Charlie Sheen. We finally realized we will always have the Juggalos. I'll never give another second to them other hoes!

Mass murder make me happy; dead bodies make me happy. Say what you will about me! I'll always have a Juggalo family. Mass murder make me happy; dead bodies make me happy. Say what you will of me. I'll always have a Juggalo family. Mass murder make me happy; dead bodies make me happy. Say what you will of me. I'll always have a Juggalo family. Mass murder make me happy; say what you will of me. [''indistinct''] of me. I'll always have a Juggalo family.

[''Chris makes retarded poses while slurring "Lotus, Lotus, Lotus, Lotus"'']

And they wanted to know if I would trade ten Juggalos for a hundred mainstream fans, and I said, "I wouldn't trade ten Juggalos for a hundred thousand mainstream fans; ten Juggalos is priceless."

Mass murder make me happy; dead bodies make me happy. Say what you will of me. I'll-lways have a Juggalo family. Mass murder make me happy; dead bodies make me happy. Say what you will of me. I'll-lways have a Juggalo family. [''clears throat''] Dead bodies make me happy; dead bodies make me happy. Say what you will of me. I'll-lways have a Juggalo family. [''fades out''] Mass murder make me happy; dead bodies make me happy. Say what you will of me. I'll-lways got a Juggalo family.

==See also==
*[[Fan:Choose Your Own Adventure]], which predicted that Chris would become a Juggalo

==External links==
*[http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/darklotus/juggalofamily.html The actual lyrics]

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[IPods Down and Listen Up]]|nextlink=[[20 December 2009]]|}}

{{Music Videos}}
[[Category: Yo! CWC Raps]]

User:Homeless prophet

2010-08-01T06:57:40Z

Homeless prophet: Created page with 'I might put something here later but for now I just want my name in blue text.'

I might put something here later but for now I just want my name in blue text.

Talk:Chris and electronics

2010-06-16T06:01:27Z

Homeless prophet:

I dunno if this needs deletion, but it definitely needs to either get bigger or get zapped. The part about Chris's shit computer is really the only useful bit, the rest is just rehashed from other pages. Lemme at least add one thing that I was thinking about lately... [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 17:07, 25 March 2010 (UTC)
*Ah, I didn't get to explain why. We need a citation of what his computer is, and frankly do we need a thing on 'netiquette"? And getting rid of that, do we need an article article on how Chris uses his computer? This could just go in the FAQ, really. The rest is just fluff. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 17:27, 25 March 2010 (UTC)

I'd like to know just how much of his internet usage is on that actual computer, and how much is off the PS3 (or even PSP)--[[User:Robotnik|Robotnik]] 19:03, 2 April 2010 (UTC)

==Piracy?==
This section provides phantom sources in support of nothing in particular. There is no information here regarding what Chris has torrented or how frequently he does it, and simply asserts that he knows how. It's single specific example, Photoshop, is based on extremely shaking reasoning: Chris is too cheap to pay for Photoshop, therefore he stole it? Please. First of all, it could be a gift. Secondly, he absolutely would pay for it, because he gets free money, has only one inflexible expense ("rent"), is not a saver, and because producing Sonichu (with Photoshop) is one of the few activities he bothers to perform. In other words, this section needs to go even if someone thinks the article can be saved. --[[User:Homeless prophet|Homeless prophet]] 06:01, 16 June 2010 (UTC)

Talk:Chris and electronics

2010-06-16T06:01:10Z

Homeless prophet:

Talk:Chris and electronics

2010-06-16T05:44:41Z

Homeless prophet:

I dunno if this needs deletion, but it definitely needs to either get bigger or get zapped. The part about Chris's shit computer is really the only useful bit, the rest is just rehashed from other pages. Lemme at least add one thing that I was thinking about lately... [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 17:07, 25 March 2010 (UTC)
*Ah, I didn't get to explain why. We need a citation of what his computer is, and frankly do we need a thing on 'netiquette"? And getting rid of that, do we need an article article on how Chris uses his computer? This could just go in the FAQ, really. The rest is just fluff. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 17:27, 25 March 2010 (UTC)

I'd like to know just how much of his internet usage is on that actual computer, and how much is off the PS3 (or even PSP)--[[User:Robotnik|Robotnik]] 19:03, 2 April 2010 (UTC)

==Piracy?==
That part of the article is not only a guess, but it's a reach. The reasoning is just that Chris wouldn't spend money on Photoshop, therefore he torrented it. First of all, there are other possibilities (it could have been a gift), and secondly he absolutely would spend money on it. Why wouldn't he? He gets paid for doing nothing and has almost no inflexible expenses. The section even argues against itself by pointing out his general spending habits. Unless there's sources for piracy this section needs to go regardless of whether the rest of the article does. --[[User:Homeless prophet|Homeless prophet]] 05:44, 16 June 2010 (UTC)

Talk:6 June 2010

2010-06-09T17:03:12Z

Homeless prophet:

Fool that I am, I think I might actually transcribe this... [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 03:31, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
*I will take the second half of DIS BITCH. This is an urge I cannot control. Also what the fuck Chris is fucking stalking Snyder now goddammit.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 03:58, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:*Sorry, I finished it up before I saw your update. I sincerely apologize if you listened to any of this shit unecessarily. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 04:06, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
::*You did a good job! I did do some transcribing before I realized you had finished it, but honestly I needed the practice anyway.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 06:03, 7 June 2010 (UTC)

== To do ==

Add Michael Synder's comment from YouTube that sparked this (see Da update for it). --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 03:32, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
* Done. [[User:Pfargtl9000|Pfargtl9000 Spam and Eggs]] 04:29, 7 June 2010 (UTC)

== Rename dis bitch ==
If a video does not have a proper name, you name it after the date it went up. This should be "6 June 2010". What is so goddamn hard about this?--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 04:00, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
*Whathisname usually figures out how to treat shit, that's why I named it that. That's why. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 04:02, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:*Now that I know Champ made the page, I feel bad about my first comment.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 06:03, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
::*You are forgiven, my son. Happens to the best of us.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 17:21, 7 June 2010 (UTC)

==I'LL RUN YOU OVER DEAD==

This is the second time that we know of that Chris has tried to commit vehicular homicide. I get the feeling that at this rate, he's going to get himself <s>v@</s> V& by the end of the year. -- [[User:Revolver Octopus|Revolver Octopus]] 07:40, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:*Chris is going to be vat'd, huh? -[[User:Brofose|Brofose]] 10:00, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
::*Probably. They need to do ''something'' to get the stank out of him. -- [[User:Revolver Octopus|Revolver Octopus]] 10:44, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:::*Still - this is only one version of the events. For all we know he could be exaggerating the entire situation - but I like to think we get the TRUE and HONEST version of events sometimes. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 12:23, 7 June 2010 (UTC)

==Add to relevant article?==
"Right, if I had the right mind, I would send, I would give him a charge of verbal, serve him a charge of verbal harassment!"
This right after he tried to take a picture of some guy to use as a dartboard, drove (presumably) drunk, took pictures without the person's consent, nearly ran two people over, and then thought he could bitch about it on the internet. Is this Chris and Law or Chris and Reality? [[User:Thelieisacake|Thelieisacake]] 14:56, 7 June 2010 (UTC)

The key theme here is that it's innocent behavior when Chris does it. I suggest Chris and Hypocrisy or Examples of Chris's Ego.
[[User:CWCspatcher|CWCspatcher]] 15:01, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
Although this definitely merits mention on Chris and the Law as well, as prime evidence of his mentality that the law is not meant for punishing him in any circumstance. [[User:CWCspatcher|CWCspatcher]] 15:04, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
*Not to mention Death Threats.--[[User:EdtheHedgehog1894|EdtheHedgehog1894]] 11:25, 7 June 2010 (EST)

==Stalking==

According to Wikipedia, which is always right, "[s]talking can be defined as the willful and repeated following, watching, and / or harassing of another person." Chris has been banned from the The GAMe PLACe. He's gone back repeatedly, each time being told to leave and never come back. He admitted to planning to go willfully back this time in order to watch and photograph Michael Snyder. It's not necessarily a crime, but it does seem to constitute stalking by a reasonable definition. I just think it should be noted that it's not just troll puffery to call it that. —[[User:Thepicklesuitintheman|Thepicklesuitintheman]] 16:54, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:*Considering Chris's history of holding grudges against people he considers "enemies", him stalking people "offending" him is not out of the question. --[[User:DrunkenDemomang|DrunkenDemomang]] 04:06, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

==Snyder's input==

Any chance we can get a hold of Mike and get his side of the story? He might appreciate it too if we got that and put it up here so everyone and his grandmother doesn't call and ask him. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 17:07, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:I sent him a message on Youtube, if I get a response (unlikely) I'll screencap it and add it to the article. If anyone knows a more direct way to contact him, it would be great to get the whole story from him.--[[User:Star Platinum|Star Platinum]] 19:40, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
::Perhaps Mimms or Lucas would know a way of getting ahold of him. Of course, you'd need to get ahold of Mimms or Lucas first, but that would seem to be an easier feat considering their past cooperation with certain websites. --[[User:shearod|shearod]] 22:36, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:::I'm in the process of asking Mimms if he knows anything about this. I'll post what I find. [[User:Meat Miracle|Meat Miracle]] 23:13, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:::*Mimms doesn't know, but he said he can ask Michael. [[User:Meat Miracle|Meat Miracle]] 02:12, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

==At the bar with a Bud and a DS==

I was re-reading the transcript of the video when these little things starting nagging me; who goes in a bar with a DS and why it sounds oh-so-familliar coming from Chris? Then, I had an insight; is there a possibility that Chris found in bars a new prowling ground for his "Love-Quest"? He had the same attitude at the local McCrap and Target but without the alcohol.[[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 17:11, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:*Maybe he's taking his parent's approach of meeting da ladies. After all, Barb and Bob met at a bar. -[[User:DrunkenDemomang|DrunkenDemomang]] 16:25, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
::Maybe he'll finally meet his sweetheart at the same age as Bob, when both parties out out of their prime and desperate enough. Of course, it would take a ''really'' desperate girl to get with Chris. [[User:Bill Lumburg|Bill Lumburg]] 20:29, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:::Don't be silly. Chris won't live anywhere near as long as Bob has so far. I predict he'll die of a heart attack in his mid fifties. Maybe forties. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 21:41, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
::::I'm also guessing 40. He eats fast food every day and he does nothing but sit on his ass. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 23:17, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:::::That's not true. Sometimes he stands up to play Guitar Hero and threaten the internet. -[[User:Schismtracer|Schismtracer]] 15:29, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

==Made up at the spot?==
Does anyone else think Chris's story sounds like it was made up at the spot at some parts? --[[User:Shotaru|Shotaru]] 23:27, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:Chris is a pathological liar, so I wouldn't put it past him. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 23:34, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:I doubt it. We have that post from June 4th by someone claiming to be Snyder saying Chris was taking pictures of him. Although I doubt Chris's testimony about what happaned especially after Micheal came out of the Game Place its right there his voice gets higher to the point where I can tell he is lying.
::Lucas and Mimms said that TheRcholic is indeed Mike way back when [[100 2178]] was uploaded. [[User:Pfargtl9000|Pfargtl9000 Spam and Eggs]] 02:05, 8 June 2010 (UTC)
:::I think most of what he's saying here is true, or at least the general concept. That said, if I had a daughter, and I saw someone like Chris hanging around with a camera, you had better believe I would assume the worst.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 02:27, 8 June 2010 (UTC)
:Chris is a bad liar. There's way too much details. He was drinking ONE beer at a local bar with his DS and a camera for ONE hour. Then, he decided ON THE SPOT to go take a picture of Michael for an inexistent dartboard? My bullshit detector was on the red right passed time 1:34. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 03:03, 8 June 2010 (UTC)
:*Well then, mine broke. [[User:Pfargtl9000|Pfargtl9000 Spam and Eggs]] 03:13, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

==Robotnik==

I haven't played any Sonic games since ''Sonic & Knuckles'', but, by Chris's own admission, pretty much what happened is that he was sneaking around doing something he shouldn't, jumped into a machine to try to beat the good guy, and ultimately failed. Not to mention that his torso is really fat and round and his limbs are really skinny. It just seems to me that Chris is getting more and more like Dr. Robotnik as time goes on. —[[User:Thepicklesuitintheman|Thepicklesuitintheman]] 07:34, 8 June 2010 (UTC)
*So he'll say "I'MMMMMMM STRAIIIIIIGHT YOU TROLLLLLSSSS!" every time we win? Awesome.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 08:57, 8 June 2010 (UTC)
:: Yeah, kinda like that. And eventually he'll get fed up of going after <s>Sonic</s> the trolls by himself and build two humorously incompetent robot henchmen. Except by "building," I mean "inflating," and the robots are actually his blow-up dolls Kimmi and Officer Nasty.

:: Hey, Clyde's hair is even spiky. Just dye it blue and you have an instant hero. Maybe Liquid can be Tails or something, I dunno. It would be just like AoStH, except "Robotnik" has no wacky schemes, isn't really actively pursuing destroying the hero, and has a fucking terrible singing voice. [[User:Lord Snotfolus|Lord Snotfolus]] 09:37, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

:::As opposed to the real Robotnik, who sings like an Angel. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 15:33, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

::::A lot like [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mvyvwoi6mrw Long John Baldry], actually. [[User:Lord Snotfolus|Lord Snotfolus]] 01:15, 9 June 2010 (UTC)

:::Make it so, number two. [[User:Bill Lumburg|Bill Lumburg]] 16:38, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

::::Ta-da.
[[Image:Dr Chris Chan.png|left|150px]][[Image:Sonic Clyde Cash.jpg|center|200px]]--[[User:Yoyoddd|Yoyoddd]] 10:19, 9 June 2010 (UTC)

==Police Report==
There must be one. I don't know any free service to get the record, but if anyone does, toss it up. Alternatively, if someone is willing to use a pay service to get at it, it might make somebody here love you. Not me though. --[[User:Homeless prophet|Homeless prophet]] 17:46, 8 June 2010 (UTC)
* Keep an eye on [http://www.criminalsearches.com/details.aspx?id=w1x00xC8&vw=criminal&1=IgL6lgJ0ciJdZHqNItwC9IIt79kNs2z0bXy0js2l1aI%3d&input=name this page]. It has Chris's other crimes, so it may be updated later. [[User:HermanoBluth|HermanoBluth]] 19:58, 8 June 2010 (UTC)
::Thanks Bluth, I'll be watching that. But there should be a document written by a police officer that details the entire incident from the perspective of that officer. I think that might do a lot to give a clear image of what happened, since all we've got is a few words from Michael (who didn't give much detail, and may not be totally correct) and a video from Chris (who is pretty okay with lying, and regardless is a poor communicator). The records are sorted by place and time, not name, but should be pretty trackable. The only issue is that I think you need access to a paid database to collect the record if you're outside the jurisdiction. I'm not 100% sure though, since I've never gone looking for one. If somebody knows how to find the record, that would probably make the entire situation ''much'' clearer. --[[User:Homeless prophet|Homeless prophet]] 17:03, 9 June 2010 (UTC)

==Am I the only one that noticed this?==
I noticed the absence of not only the medallion but also the amnyfest ring. Usually this means that this isnt TRUE and HONEST content, right? Or is there some other mitigating circumstance? I am not going to edit the article to highlight this as I doubt that no one hasnt noticed these things missing. I am just interested on you guys' take on this. Thoughts? [[User:Wozblod|Wozblod]] 20:59, 8 June 2010 (UTC)
:*Good eye! I missed this detail.--[[User:DrunkenDemomang|DrunkenDemomang]] 21:30, 8 June 2010 (UTC)
::*Neither have the past two videos before this. Either that means the past two videos (effectively both internet rage quits, and we can see how honest those were) were all lies, or it's part of his newer, more-"mature" (if you can call it that) image, what with the less retarded clothing. I think the latter is more likely, although the former would make sense. I just doubt Chris actually plans things like that. And given his frequent tendency of lying, he'd probably label blatant lies as True and Honest anyway. --[[User:KingoftheJuice|KingoftheJuice]] 04:10, 9 June 2010 (UTC)

== A Warning...Really? ==

Did the cops seriously let Chris off with a warning? Were they not informed beforehand about his previous troubles with Chris? I was absolutely furious to hear that Chris was let off the hook again. --SpaceScreaminJohn 00:49, 9 June 2010 (UTC)

He's got three priors so the police know him. And they what we know; he's too weak to cause people real harm. Still, he's dangerous behind the wheel. [[User:Bill Lumburg|Bill Lumburg]] 00:56, 9 June 2010 (UTC)
*Those three priors were five years ago. Plus, anyone who sees Chris can tell that he has some sort of mental problem--Wes always thought he had Downs, for example. If Bob and Barb are any indication, Charlottesville is surrounded by lawsuit happy rednecks and the cop wouldn't have a chance in court--and even then such a scandal would ruin their career, they'd always be "that monster who busted a poor retarded guy". Really, the warning was the best thing they could do. If Chris winds up doing something stupid again this year, they'll probably come down on him a bit harder.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 01:18, 9 June 2010 (UTC)

Talk:6 June 2010

2010-06-08T17:46:45Z

Homeless prophet:

Fool that I am, I think I might actually transcribe this... [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 03:31, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
*I will take the second half of DIS BITCH. This is an urge I cannot control. Also what the fuck Chris is fucking stalking Snyder now goddammit.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 03:58, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:*Sorry, I finished it up before I saw your update. I sincerely apologize if you listened to any of this shit unecessarily. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 04:06, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
::*You did a good job! I did do some transcribing before I realized you had finished it, but honestly I needed the practice anyway.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 06:03, 7 June 2010 (UTC)

== To do ==

Add Michael Synder's comment from YouTube that sparked this (see Da update for it). --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 03:32, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
* Done. [[User:Pfargtl9000|Pfargtl9000 Spam and Eggs]] 04:29, 7 June 2010 (UTC)

== Rename dis bitch ==
If a video does not have a proper name, you name it after the date it went up. This should be "6 June 2010". What is so goddamn hard about this?--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 04:00, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
*Whathisname usually figures out how to treat shit, that's why I named it that. That's why. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 04:02, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:*Now that I know Champ made the page, I feel bad about my first comment.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 06:03, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
::*You are forgiven, my son. Happens to the best of us.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 17:21, 7 June 2010 (UTC)

==I'LL RUN YOU OVER DEAD==

This is the second time that we know of that Chris has tried to commit vehicular homicide. I get the feeling that at this rate, he's going to get himself <s>v@</s> V& by the end of the year. -- [[User:Revolver Octopus|Revolver Octopus]] 07:40, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:*Chris is going to be vat'd, huh? -[[User:Brofose|Brofose]] 10:00, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
::*Probably. They need to do ''something'' to get the stank out of him. -- [[User:Revolver Octopus|Revolver Octopus]] 10:44, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:::*Still - this is only one version of the events. For all we know he could be exaggerating the entire situation - but I like to think we get the TRUE and HONEST version of events sometimes. --[[User:Anonymax|Anonymax]] 12:23, 7 June 2010 (UTC)

==Add to relevant article?==
"Right, if I had the right mind, I would send, I would give him a charge of verbal, serve him a charge of verbal harassment!"
This right after he tried to take a picture of some guy to use as a dartboard, drove (presumably) drunk, took pictures without the person's consent, nearly ran two people over, and then thought he could bitch about it on the internet. Is this Chris and Law or Chris and Reality? [[User:Thelieisacake|Thelieisacake]] 14:56, 7 June 2010 (UTC)

The key theme here is that it's innocent behavior when Chris does it. I suggest Chris and Hypocrisy or Examples of Chris's Ego.
[[User:CWCspatcher|CWCspatcher]] 15:01, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
Although this definitely merits mention on Chris and the Law as well, as prime evidence of his mentality that the law is not meant for punishing him in any circumstance. [[User:CWCspatcher|CWCspatcher]] 15:04, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
*Not to mention Death Threats.--[[User:EdtheHedgehog1894|EdtheHedgehog1894]] 11:25, 7 June 2010 (EST)

==Stalking==

According to Wikipedia, which is always right, "[s]talking can be defined as the willful and repeated following, watching, and / or harassing of another person." Chris has been banned from the The GAMe PLACe. He's gone back repeatedly, each time being told to leave and never come back. He admitted to planning to go willfully back this time in order to watch and photograph Michael Snyder. It's not necessarily a crime, but it does seem to constitute stalking by a reasonable definition. I just think it should be noted that it's not just troll puffery to call it that. —[[User:Thepicklesuitintheman|Thepicklesuitintheman]] 16:54, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:*Considering Chris's history of holding grudges against people he considers "enemies", him stalking people "offending" him is not out of the question. --[[User:DrunkenDemomang|DrunkenDemomang]] 04:06, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

==Snyder's input==

Any chance we can get a hold of Mike and get his side of the story? He might appreciate it too if we got that and put it up here so everyone and his grandmother doesn't call and ask him. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 17:07, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:I sent him a message on Youtube, if I get a response (unlikely) I'll screencap it and add it to the article. If anyone knows a more direct way to contact him, it would be great to get the whole story from him.--[[User:Star Platinum|Star Platinum]] 19:40, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
::Perhaps Mimms or Lucas would know a way of getting ahold of him. Of course, you'd need to get ahold of Mimms or Lucas first, but that would seem to be an easier feat considering their past cooperation with certain websites. --[[User:shearod|shearod]] 22:36, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:::I'm in the process of asking Mimms if he knows anything about this. I'll post what I find. [[User:Meat Miracle|Meat Miracle]] 23:13, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:::*Mimms doesn't know, but he said he can ask Michael. [[User:Meat Miracle|Meat Miracle]] 02:12, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

==At the bar with a Bud and a DS==

I was re-reading the transcript of the video when these little things starting nagging me; who goes in a bar with a DS and why it sounds oh-so-familliar coming from Chris? Then, I had an insight; is there a possibility that Chris found in bars a new prowling ground for his "Love-Quest"? He had the same attitude at the local McCrap and Target but without the alcohol.[[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 17:11, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:*Maybe he's taking his parent's approach of meeting da ladies. After all, Barb and Bob met at a bar. -[[User:DrunkenDemomang|DrunkenDemomang]] 16:25, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
::Maybe he'll finally meet his sweetheart at the same age as Bob, when both parties out out of their prime and desperate enough. Of course, it would take a ''really'' desperate girl to get with Chris. [[User:Bill Lumburg|Bill Lumburg]] 20:29, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:::Don't be silly. Chris won't live anywhere near as long as Bob has so far. I predict he'll die of a heart attack in his mid fifties. Maybe forties. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 21:41, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
::::I'm also guessing 40. He eats fast food every day and he does nothing but sit on his ass. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 23:17, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:::::That's not true. Sometimes he stands up to play Guitar Hero and threaten the internet. -[[User:Schismtracer|Schismtracer]] 15:29, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

==Made up at the spot?==
Does anyone else think Chris's story sounds like it was made up at the spot at some parts? --[[User:Shotaru|Shotaru]] 23:27, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:Chris is a pathological liar, so I wouldn't put it past him. --[[User:BreadGod|BreadGod]] 23:34, 7 June 2010 (UTC)
:I doubt it. We have that post from June 4th by someone claiming to be Snyder saying Chris was taking pictures of him. Although I doubt Chris's testimony about what happaned especially after Micheal came out of the Game Place its right there his voice gets higher to the point where I can tell he is lying.
::Lucas and Mimms said that TheRcholic is indeed Mike way back when [[100 2178]] was uploaded. [[User:Pfargtl9000|Pfargtl9000 Spam and Eggs]] 02:05, 8 June 2010 (UTC)
:::I think most of what he's saying here is true, or at least the general concept. That said, if I had a daughter, and I saw someone like Chris hanging around with a camera, you had better believe I would assume the worst.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 02:27, 8 June 2010 (UTC)
:Chris is a bad liar. There's way too much details. He was drinking ONE beer at a local bar with his DS and a camera for ONE hour. Then, he decided ON THE SPOT to go take a picture of Michael for an inexistent dartboard? My bullshit detector was on the red right passed time 1:34. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 03:03, 8 June 2010 (UTC)
:*Well then, mine broke. [[User:Pfargtl9000|Pfargtl9000 Spam and Eggs]] 03:13, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

==Robotnik==

I haven't played any Sonic games since ''Sonic & Knuckles'', but, by Chris's own admission, pretty much what happened is that he was sneaking around doing something he shouldn't, jumped into a machine to try to beat the good guy, and ultimately failed. Not to mention that his torso is really fat and round and his limbs are really skinny. It just seems to me that Chris is getting more and more like Dr. Robotnik as time goes on. —[[User:Thepicklesuitintheman|Thepicklesuitintheman]] 07:34, 8 June 2010 (UTC)
*So he'll say "I'MMMMMMM STRAIIIIIIGHT YOU TROLLLLLSSSS!" every time we win? Awesome.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 08:57, 8 June 2010 (UTC)
:: Yeah, kinda like that. And eventually he'll get fed up of going after <s>Sonic</s> the trolls by himself and build two humorously incompetent robot henchmen. Except by "building," I mean "inflating," and the robots are actually his blow-up dolls Kimmi and Officer Nasty.

:: Hey, Clyde's hair is even spiky. Just dye it blue and you have an instant hero. Maybe Liquid can be Tails or something, I dunno. It would be just like AoStH, except "Robotnik" has no wacky schemes, isn't really actively pursuing destroying the hero, and has a fucking terrible singing voice. [[User:Lord Snotfolus|Lord Snotfolus]] 09:37, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

:::As opposed to the real Robotnik, who sings like an Angel. --[[User:Edward|Edward]] 15:33, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

:::Make it so, number two. [[User:Bill Lumburg|Bill Lumburg]] 16:38, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

==Police Report==
There must be one. I don't know any free service to get the record, but if anyone does, toss it up. Alternatively, if someone is willing to use a pay service to get at it, it might make somebody here love you. Not me though. --[[User:Homeless prophet|Homeless prophet]] 17:46, 8 June 2010 (UTC)

Talk:The Hook Cafe

2010-04-10T00:10:07Z

Homeless prophet:

Hi guys, I think this might be a fake account: http://twitter.com/search?q=-RT%20sonichu+-sonichu1%20-wildsonichu1%20-MaryLeeWalsh1%20-Sandy_Rosechu%20-WildSonichu1#search?q=-RT%20sonichu%20-sonichu1%20-wildsonichu1%20-MaryLeeWalsh1%20-Sandy_Rosechu%20-WildSonichu1 [[User:Godz1lla|Godz1lla]] 18:27, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
*Twitter link is broke. Can you fix it? [[User:SniperFire16|SniperFire16]]
:*This should work: http://twitter.com/#search?q=crescentskunk I'm not sure about this any more though, the account seems to be different now that I've seen crescentskunk's preview, I might have just jumped the gun a bit.[[User:Godz1lla|Godz1lla]] 08:52, 7 April 2010 (UTC)
I'll set to putting together a summary of this, I guess. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 22:38, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
::*I'll check the link later, but thank much for posting a fresh one.--[[User:SniperFire16|SniperFire16]] 00:30, 8 April 2010 (UTC)
*The current format sucks (no offense). We need to mirror the content - the last Hook Cafe ad Chris had is forever lost in time, so now we need to mirror this for when this inevitably gets hacked. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 22:52, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
:* So you want it all replicated word-for-word? Easily done. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 22:55, 5 April 2010 (UTC)

*Chris's favorite radio station: http://www.z95.net/ --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 23:02, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
:* And it's...yep, home to the John Tesh show. Weird. So far as I can tell this is like a station for 35-year-old women. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 23:08, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
::*I think the numerous John Tesh references (at least the times he's popped up in the background of calls) might warrant an article for the guy.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 23:17, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
:::*I was about to say the exact same thing. Especially since he probably provided the germ for Chris's fixation on the three-date rule. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 23:18, 5 April 2010 (UTC)

Oh god....
Anyway he's aiming a little high isn't he?
[[User:Dkd|Dkd]] 23:38, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
*Only if you mean him not accepting anyone: over age 28, overweight, mature, or of any ethnicity other than white. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 23:41, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
*I just noticed the "blacks need not apply part
:* Well of course. Don't you know that being racist towards black people is personal trait that women find attractive? :P This is classic Chris- doing at least one major thing that causes him to fail without him realizing it. --[[User:Spoonman|Spoonman]] 01:48, 7 April 2010 (UTC)
*"''People say my face is my best feature.''" I don't know what to think. Either Chris isn't aware that acne isn't attractive, or he thinks people won't notice. So yeah, Chris is aiming a little high.
** Well, his face kind of ''is'' his best feature, his [[Obesity|other]] [[Duck|features]] are, in fact, that bad. --[[User:DStecks|DStecks]] 21:29, 7 April 2010 (UTC)
[[User:Dkd|Dkd]] 23:45, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
:*Well... at least he's saying 21 instead of 18. That's almost like progress. Almost.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 23:48, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
** I have to wonder if he found out about the "half your age plus seven" rule that people sometimes use to figure an appropriate age to date. Knowing Chris's tendency to take such things as written in stone rules... so yeah. [[User:Magic8Ball|Magic8Ball]] 00:57, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
::*As long as It keeps him from hitting on High School girls, I'm okay with it. The facebook messages he sent to that one 17 year old still make me shudder.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 02:54, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
*Welp, the little voice in my head told me to sign up in order to troll Chris, so I went for it...unfortunately, I need to have credits in order to establish communication. Should I abort and let a for real person do it instead? [[User:SniperFire16|SniperFire16]]
**How much is it gonna set you back?--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 03:10, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
**Considering that a ninety day pass is $40.00USD, and I believe I have seventy bucks in my checking account, I think I should abort. Any thoughts? --[[User:SniperFire16|SniperFire16]] 00:30, 8 April 2010 (UTC)
*** I created a fake account, paid for it, uploaded some bullshit and flirted with Chris. I also sent him an e-mail saying I'd upload a picture and my 'digits' as soon as I got home from school. No replies yet, but without a picture I probably won't get far. Unfortunately, I am stuck in Sydney airport with only an iPhone for Internet so I can't upload one right away. I will attempt to find a net cafe or something- this opportunity is too good to pass up. [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 03:40, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

*Damn it guys, stop trying to be the next bluespike, what is needed is a field agent to go on a date with Chris, and try to get even more info, who knows, it might be the return of the man in the pickle suit.[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 04:39, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
:*I haven't seen anything that brings up bluespike-like trolling. If anything this'll could turn into another Kacey or, if we use a field agent, another Emily. Do we have any willing field agents we could call upon? --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 04:55, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
:*I'm not trying to be anyone. I wanted to rattle some cages. I guess I should abort my mission, huh?--[[User:SniperFire16|SniperFire16]] 00:30, 8 April 2010 (UTC)
** I live in Australia and I have a pickle, or I totally would. This is the best I can do. [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 04:50, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
::*I don't suppose this fake account is "luv2jax", the girl who wants a 26-30 year old, hates smoking, and can't seem to get enough shopping or sex? The same girl who thinks "a monkey on roller skates" would be ''hilarious''? She seems to be designed for Chris. Regardless, please nobody interfere if it looks like he gets a genuine response. I think that would have a lot more comedic potential. His profile is close enough to non-retarded that it just might get the attention of a racist woman with very low standards. There's got to be one at least one of those in Virginia. --[[User:Homeless prophet|Homeless prophet]] 22:15, 7 April 2010 (UTC)
:::*Er, forget that guess. I filtered for ages 21-28 and didn't see the obvious one. --[[User:Homeless prophet|Homeless prophet]] 03:14, 8 April 2010 (UTC)
::::*I had exactly the same thought as you. I honestly think he'll be more attracted to the other 'chick' that I'm a little disheartened, but 'eh. I am convinced the other is a fake too, so much so that I sent her a message along the lines of 'ohai so i herd you zap to the extreme?'. No reply yet, but if I was that person I'd be reluctant to blow my cover after that much work. The eventual plan with this persona is to reveal she's actually 12 years old to see how Chris responds to loli. [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 04:26, 8 April 2010 (UTC)
:::* For what it's worth, "luv2jax" is the screenname of a user on Xtube. Don't know if it's a coincidence or not. However, I think I saw her picture at [[/cwc/]] so I think it's probably a troll too.

I too tried to troll chris but I underestimated his autism. I had a backup plan, though. We might see a surprise this saturday at chris' house. --[[User:One With The Lulz|One With The Lulz]] 02:25, 9 April 2010 (UTC)
* Did you get a reply at all? All I got was deafening silence, followed by a ban (despite five emails and a flirt). Any idea what might of happened, and did your account get banned too? [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 03:56, 9 April 2010 (UTC)
== So should we do this for his other dating profiles too? ==

I mean, I'm looking at his OkCupid Profile right now. I'm pretty sure it's several years old, but even back then he still checked himself off as looking for casual sex.

Not that he'll ever get any.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 03:15, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
:Now that I think about it, probably the best way to do it would be to have one page titled "Dating sites" where we mirror his various awful dating profiles of fail.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 03:17, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

*No, I think each individual one should. Redundant but these are primary sources and it's easier to cite an individual profile. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 04:57, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

I once listed a number under [[Dating]]. --[[User:Delabonte|Delabonte]] 05:05, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

== Religion: None ==

That's unusual. I've said that Chris isn't a "Christian" in any real way before, but I know he self-identifies as one pretty strongly. It's really weird for him to list himself as "None, Christian". I guess it's possible he finally realized that openly Christian women typically aren't seeking casual sex, so this way he shows up on searches for people without religion, but its' still not very Chris-like at all.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 04:00, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

•I noticed that as well. I didn't have any clue why he would do such a thing given his strong Christian identity, but the idea that he wants to show up on the searches of Godless Heathen Babes looking for sexy sweets rings true to me. The Fuck Quest overrides all other concerns, after all. [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 04:07, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

* There are 3 possible explanations. 1) He's a dumbass 2) He i s tired of being called upon, every time he does something that goes against the bible, so he now has an excuse of " nah i don't follow the bible directly" and still say " the homos are going to hell because the bible says so". 3)He doesn't want to be with a woman that's too much into religion anymore, to not get the "abstinence" excuse to not have hankey pankey. Either way, it's because Chris had enough of religion for a while, since it's not helping him right now.[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 04:26, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

:*There's no way of knowing until Chris explains it himself, and the best way to do that is to put a huge ad on the CWCipedia accusing Chris of abandoning God and selling his soul to the devil.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 04:45, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

:*When you fill out the profile, there's a drop-down menu of various religion choices, plus an open field to fill in whatever you want if your choice isn't in the menu. Chris picked "None" from the drop-down menu because Methodist isn't one of the options offered, then typed Christian/Methodist in the open field. If he'd left the drop-down alone, it probably wouldn't have displayed anything. So he hasn't abandoned his faith or anything, he just fucked up filling out a web form. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 04:47, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
::*Diaken's explination makes the most sense. Which is kind of a shame because it's also the most boring. I don't think my initial "wants to show up on searches for atheist" guess is too far off though.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 04:55, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

:*Chris hardly even knows what Atheism is, and from what we gather he has as much of an irrational hatred of Atheists as he does with Homosexuals and the like. --[[User:Thorgnzorrg|Thorgnzorrg]] 19:57, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

Oh it's elementary, Watson. He's of no religion now (fuck abstinency!), but he's still Christian... Weston Chandler! --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 15:10, 7 April 2010 (UTC)

*YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH! --[[User:DStecks|DStecks]] 21:31, 7 April 2010 (UTC)

== Earlier ad ==

Oldfags may recall Chris had an add through here before, which may have been documented somewhere on the ED page if you dig. I doubt anyone archived it though, and I do recall it was legit though it was eventually hacked to make it seem like Chris was gay and how his favorite food was pickles, etc. This should be referenced somewhere though. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 07:58, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
*Yeah, here's where the ad used to be: http://charlottesville.selectalternatives.com/gyrobase/Personals/Profile?person=oid%3A239898 [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 16:00, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

== Gone? ==

As of a few minutes ago both Chris' and Sandy's pages appear to be gone. I'm gunna make a guess here and say that Chris finally fucking checked his email and made the connection between the 12 year old girl calling him and the adults only ad with an 18 year old in it. I would guess that Snorlax flew into a rage and got him to take down the page, while reporting Sandy's. That or I'm retarded and they're still up. I'm at work so I only have my iPhone ATM, can anyone confirm? [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 02:02, 9 April 2010 (UTC)

:Well the links at the bottom of the page don't work. That's as good an indicator as any.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 02:25, 9 April 2010 (UTC)
:Yes, it's gone. --[[User:One With The Lulz|One With The Lulz]] 02:32, 9 April 2010 (UTC)
:Any word on whether the deletion was done by Chris himself or the site mods? [[User:Hurrrr2|Hurrrr2]] 10:28, 9 April 2010 (UTC)
:I think it could be the mods, my theory is that it has to do with the no blacks thing.--[[User:UJ1A1985|UJ1A1985]] 22:26, 9 April 2010 (UTC)
::I'd say that makes sense; I'm sure they don't tolerate blatant racism. Things is, that wouldn't cause Sandy's profile to be yanked down as well.--[[User:Homeless prophet|Homeless prophet]] 00:10, 10 April 2010 (UTC)

Talk:The Hook Cafe

2010-04-08T03:14:41Z

Homeless prophet:

Hi guys, I think this might be a fake account: http://twitter.com/search?q=-RT%20sonichu+-sonichu1%20-wildsonichu1%20-MaryLeeWalsh1%20-Sandy_Rosechu%20-WildSonichu1#search?q=-RT%20sonichu%20-sonichu1%20-wildsonichu1%20-MaryLeeWalsh1%20-Sandy_Rosechu%20-WildSonichu1 [[User:Godz1lla|Godz1lla]] 18:27, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
*Twitter link is broke. Can you fix it? [[User:SniperFire16|SniperFire16]]
:*This should work: http://twitter.com/#search?q=crescentskunk I'm not sure about this any more though, the account seems to be different now that I've seen crescentskunk's preview, I might have just jumped the gun a bit.[[User:Godz1lla|Godz1lla]] 08:52, 7 April 2010 (UTC)
I'll set to putting together a summary of this, I guess. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 22:38, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
::*I'll check the link later, but thank much for posting a fresh one.--[[User:SniperFire16|SniperFire16]] 00:30, 8 April 2010 (UTC)
*The current format sucks (no offense). We need to mirror the content - the last Hook Cafe ad Chris had is forever lost in time, so now we need to mirror this for when this inevitably gets hacked. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 22:52, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
:* So you want it all replicated word-for-word? Easily done. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 22:55, 5 April 2010 (UTC)

*Chris's favorite radio station: http://www.z95.net/ --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 23:02, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
:* And it's...yep, home to the John Tesh show. Weird. So far as I can tell this is like a station for 35-year-old women. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 23:08, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
::*I think the numerous John Tesh references (at least the times he's popped up in the background of calls) might warrant an article for the guy.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 23:17, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
:::*I was about to say the exact same thing. Especially since he probably provided the germ for Chris's fixation on the three-date rule. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 23:18, 5 April 2010 (UTC)

Oh god....
Anyway he's aiming a little high isn't he?
[[User:Dkd|Dkd]] 23:38, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
*Only if you mean him not accepting anyone: over age 28, overweight, mature, or of any ethnicity other than white. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 23:41, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
*I just noticed the "blacks need not apply part
:* Well of course. Don't you know that being racist towards black people is personal trait that women find attractive? :P This is classic Chris- doing at least one major thing that causes him to fail without him realizing it. --[[User:Spoonman|Spoonman]] 01:48, 7 April 2010 (UTC)
*"''People say my face is my best feature.''" I don't know what to think. Either Chris isn't aware that acne isn't attractive, or he thinks people won't notice. So yeah, Chris is aiming a little high.
** Well, his face kind of ''is'' his best feature, his [[Obesity|other]] [[Duck|features]] are, in fact, that bad. --[[User:DStecks|DStecks]] 21:29, 7 April 2010 (UTC)
[[User:Dkd|Dkd]] 23:45, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
:*Well... at least he's saying 21 instead of 18. That's almost like progress. Almost.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 23:48, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
** I have to wonder if he found out about the "half your age plus seven" rule that people sometimes use to figure an appropriate age to date. Knowing Chris's tendency to take such things as written in stone rules... so yeah. [[User:Magic8Ball|Magic8Ball]] 00:57, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
::*As long as It keeps him from hitting on High School girls, I'm okay with it. The facebook messages he sent to that one 17 year old still make me shudder.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 02:54, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
*Welp, the little voice in my head told me to sign up in order to troll Chris, so I went for it...unfortunately, I need to have credits in order to establish communication. Should I abort and let a for real person do it instead? [[User:SniperFire16|SniperFire16]]
**How much is it gonna set you back?--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 03:10, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
**Considering that a ninety day pass is $40.00USD, and I believe I have seventy bucks in my checking account, I think I should abort. Any thoughts? --[[User:SniperFire16|SniperFire16]] 00:30, 8 April 2010 (UTC)
*** I created a fake account, paid for it, uploaded some bullshit and flirted with Chris. I also sent him an e-mail saying I'd upload a picture and my 'digits' as soon as I got home from school. No replies yet, but without a picture I probably won't get far. Unfortunately, I am stuck in Sydney airport with only an iPhone for Internet so I can't upload one right away. I will attempt to find a net cafe or something- this opportunity is too good to pass up. [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 03:40, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

*Damn it guys, stop trying to be the next bluespike, what is needed is a field agent to go on a date with Chris, and try to get even more info, who knows, it might be the return of the man in the pickle suit.[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 04:39, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
:*I haven't seen anything that brings up bluespike-like trolling. If anything this'll could turn into another Kacey or, if we use a field agent, another Emily. Do we have any willing field agents we could call upon? --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 04:55, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
:*I'm not trying to be anyone. I wanted to rattle some cages. I guess I should abort my mission, huh?--[[User:SniperFire16|SniperFire16]] 00:30, 8 April 2010 (UTC)
** I live in Australia and I have a pickle, or I totally would. This is the best I can do. [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 04:50, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
::*I don't suppose this fake account is "luv2jax", the girl who wants a 26-30 year old, hates smoking, and can't seem to get enough shopping or sex? The same girl who thinks "a monkey on roller skates" would be ''hilarious''? She seems to be designed for Chris. Regardless, please nobody interfere if it looks like he gets a genuine response. I think that would have a lot more comedic potential. His profile is close enough to non-retarded that it just might get the attention of a racist woman with very low standards. There's got to be one at least one of those in Virginia. --[[User:Homeless prophet|Homeless prophet]] 22:15, 7 April 2010 (UTC)
:::*Er, forget that guess. I filtered for ages 21-28 and didn't see the obvious one. --[[User:Homeless prophet|Homeless prophet]] 03:14, 8 April 2010 (UTC)
== So should we do this for his other dating profiles too? ==

I mean, I'm looking at his OkCupid Profile right now. I'm pretty sure it's several years old, but even back then he still checked himself off as looking for casual sex.

Not that he'll ever get any.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 03:15, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
:Now that I think about it, probably the best way to do it would be to have one page titled "Dating sites" where we mirror his various awful dating profiles of fail.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 03:17, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

*No, I think each individual one should. Redundant but these are primary sources and it's easier to cite an individual profile. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 04:57, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

I once listed a number under [[Dating]]. --[[User:Delabonte|Delabonte]] 05:05, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

== Religion: None ==

That's unusual. I've said that Chris isn't a "Christian" in any real way before, but I know he self-identifies as one pretty strongly. It's really weird for him to list himself as "None, Christian". I guess it's possible he finally realized that openly Christian women typically aren't seeking casual sex, so this way he shows up on searches for people without religion, but its' still not very Chris-like at all.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 04:00, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

•I noticed that as well. I didn't have any clue why he would do such a thing given his strong Christian identity, but the idea that he wants to show up on the searches of Godless Heathen Babes looking for sexy sweets rings true to me. The Fuck Quest overrides all other concerns, after all. [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 04:07, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

* There are 3 possible explanations. 1) He's a dumbass 2) He i s tired of being called upon, every time he does something that goes against the bible, so he now has an excuse of " nah i don't follow the bible directly" and still say " the homos are going to hell because the bible says so". 3)He doesn't want to be with a woman that's too much into religion anymore, to not get the "abstinence" excuse to not have hankey pankey. Either way, it's because Chris had enough of religion for a while, since it's not helping him right now.[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 04:26, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

:*There's no way of knowing until Chris explains it himself, and the best way to do that is to put a huge ad on the CWCipedia accusing Chris of abandoning God and selling his soul to the devil.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 04:45, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

:*When you fill out the profile, there's a drop-down menu of various religion choices, plus an open field to fill in whatever you want if your choice isn't in the menu. Chris picked "None" from the drop-down menu because Methodist isn't one of the options offered, then typed Christian/Methodist in the open field. If he'd left the drop-down alone, it probably wouldn't have displayed anything. So he hasn't abandoned his faith or anything, he just fucked up filling out a web form. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 04:47, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
::*Diaken's explination makes the most sense. Which is kind of a shame because it's also the most boring. I don't think my initial "wants to show up on searches for atheist" guess is too far off though.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 04:55, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

:*Chris hardly even knows what Atheism is, and from what we gather he has as much of an irrational hatred of Atheists as he does with Homosexuals and the like. --[[User:Thorgnzorrg|Thorgnzorrg]] 19:57, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

Oh it's elementary, Watson. He's of no religion now (fuck abstinency!), but he's still Christian... Weston Chandler! --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 15:10, 7 April 2010 (UTC)

*YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH! --[[User:DStecks|DStecks]] 21:31, 7 April 2010 (UTC)

== Earlier ad ==

Oldfags may recall Chris had an add through here before, which may have been documented somewhere on the ED page if you dig. I doubt anyone archived it though, and I do recall it was legit though it was eventually hacked to make it seem like Chris was gay and how his favorite food was pickles, etc. This should be referenced somewhere though. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 07:58, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
*Yeah, here's where the ad used to be: http://charlottesville.selectalternatives.com/gyrobase/Personals/Profile?person=oid%3A239898 [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 16:00, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

Talk:The Hook Cafe

2010-04-07T22:15:30Z

Homeless prophet:

Hi guys, I think this might be a fake account: http://twitter.com/search?q=-RT%20sonichu+-sonichu1%20-wildsonichu1%20-MaryLeeWalsh1%20-Sandy_Rosechu%20-WildSonichu1#search?q=-RT%20sonichu%20-sonichu1%20-wildsonichu1%20-MaryLeeWalsh1%20-Sandy_Rosechu%20-WildSonichu1 [[User:Godz1lla|Godz1lla]] 18:27, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
*Twitter link is broke. Can you fix it? [[User:SniperFire16|SniperFire16]]
:*This should work: http://twitter.com/#search?q=crescentskunk I'm not sure about this any more though, the account seems to be different now that I've seen crescentskunk's preview, I might have just jumped the gun a bit.[[User:Godz1lla|Godz1lla]] 08:52, 7 April 2010 (UTC)
I'll set to putting together a summary of this, I guess. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 22:38, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
*The current format sucks (no offense). We need to mirror the content - the last Hook Cafe ad Chris had is forever lost in time, so now we need to mirror this for when this inevitably gets hacked. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 22:52, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
:* So you want it all replicated word-for-word? Easily done. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 22:55, 5 April 2010 (UTC)

*Chris's favorite radio station: http://www.z95.net/ --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 23:02, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
:* And it's...yep, home to the John Tesh show. Weird. So far as I can tell this is like a station for 35-year-old women. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 23:08, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
::*I think the numerous John Tesh references (at least the times he's popped up in the background of calls) might warrant an article for the guy.--[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 23:17, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
:::*I was about to say the exact same thing. Especially since he probably provided the germ for Chris's fixation on the three-date rule. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 23:18, 5 April 2010 (UTC)

Oh god....
Anyway he's aiming a little high isn't he?
[[User:Dkd|Dkd]] 23:38, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
*Only if you mean him not accepting anyone: over age 28, overweight, mature, or of any ethnicity other than white. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 23:41, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
*I just noticed the "blacks need not apply part
:* Well of course. Don't you know that being racist towards black people is personal trait that women find attractive? :P This is classic Chris- doing at least one major thing that causes him to fail without him realizing it. --[[User:Spoonman|Spoonman]] 01:48, 7 April 2010 (UTC)
*"''People say my face is my best feature.''" I don't know what to think. Either Chris isn't aware that acne isn't attractive, or he thinks people won't notice. So yeah, Chris is aiming a little high.
** Well, his face kind of ''is'' his best feature, his [[Obesity|other]] [[Duck|features]] are, in fact, that bad. --[[User:DStecks|DStecks]] 21:29, 7 April 2010 (UTC)
[[User:Dkd|Dkd]] 23:45, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
:*Well... at least he's saying 21 instead of 18. That's almost like progress. Almost.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 23:48, 5 April 2010 (UTC)
** I have to wonder if he found out about the "half your age plus seven" rule that people sometimes use to figure an appropriate age to date. Knowing Chris's tendency to take such things as written in stone rules... so yeah. [[User:Magic8Ball|Magic8Ball]] 00:57, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
::*As long as It keeps him from hitting on High School girls, I'm okay with it. The facebook messages he sent to that one 17 year old still make me shudder.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 02:54, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
*Welp, the little voice in my head told me to sign up in order to troll Chris, so I went for it...unfortunately, I need to have credits in order to establish communication. Should I abort and let a for real person do it instead? [[User:SniperFire16|SniperFire16]]
**How much is it gonna set you back?--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 03:10, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
**Considering that a ninety day pass is $40.00USD, and I believe I have seventy bucks in my checking account, I think I should abort. Any thoughts? [[User:SniperFire16|SniperFire16]]
UTC)
*** I created a fake account, paid for it, uploaded some bullshit and flirted with Chris. I also sent him an e-mail saying I'd upload a picture and my 'digits' as soon as I got home from school. No replies yet, but without a picture I probably won't get far. Unfortunately, I am stuck in Sydney airport with only an iPhone for Internet so I can't upload one right away. I will attempt to find a net cafe or something- this opportunity is too good to pass up. [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 03:40, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

*Damn it guys, stop trying to be the next bluespike, what is needed is a field agent to go on a date with Chris, and try to get even more info, who knows, it might be the return of the man in the pickle suit.[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 04:39, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
:*I haven't seen anything that brings up bluespike-like trolling. If anything this'll could turn into another Kacey or, if we use a field agent, another Emily. Do we have any willing field agents we could call upon? --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 04:55, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

** I live in Australia and I have a pickle, or I totally would. This is the best I can do. [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 04:50, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
::*I don't suppose this fake account is "luv2jax", the girl who wants a 26-30 year old, hates smoking, and can't seem to get enough shopping or sex? The same girl who thinks "a monkey on roller skates" would be ''hilarious''? She seems to be designed for Chris. Regardless, please nobody interfere if it looks like he gets a genuine response. I think that would have a lot more comedic potential. His profile is close enough to non-retarded that it just might get the attention of a racist woman with very low standards. There's got to be one at least one of those in Virginia. --[[User:Homeless prophet|Homeless prophet]] 22:15, 7 April 2010 (UTC)
== So should we do this for his other dating profiles too? ==

I mean, I'm looking at his OkCupid Profile right now. I'm pretty sure it's several years old, but even back then he still checked himself off as looking for casual sex.

Not that he'll ever get any.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 03:15, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
:Now that I think about it, probably the best way to do it would be to have one page titled "Dating sites" where we mirror his various awful dating profiles of fail.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 03:17, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

*No, I think each individual one should. Redundant but these are primary sources and it's easier to cite an individual profile. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 04:57, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

I once listed a number under [[Dating]]. --[[User:Delabonte|Delabonte]] 05:05, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

== Religion: None ==

That's unusual. I've said that Chris isn't a "Christian" in any real way before, but I know he self-identifies as one pretty strongly. It's really weird for him to list himself as "None, Christian". I guess it's possible he finally realized that openly Christian women typically aren't seeking casual sex, so this way he shows up on searches for people without religion, but its' still not very Chris-like at all.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 04:00, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

•I noticed that as well. I didn't have any clue why he would do such a thing given his strong Christian identity, but the idea that he wants to show up on the searches of Godless Heathen Babes looking for sexy sweets rings true to me. The Fuck Quest overrides all other concerns, after all. [[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 04:07, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

* There are 3 possible explanations. 1) He's a dumbass 2) He i s tired of being called upon, every time he does something that goes against the bible, so he now has an excuse of " nah i don't follow the bible directly" and still say " the homos are going to hell because the bible says so". 3)He doesn't want to be with a woman that's too much into religion anymore, to not get the "abstinence" excuse to not have hankey pankey. Either way, it's because Chris had enough of religion for a while, since it's not helping him right now.[[User:Basgon|Basgon]] 04:26, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

:*There's no way of knowing until Chris explains it himself, and the best way to do that is to put a huge ad on the CWCipedia accusing Chris of abandoning God and selling his soul to the devil.--[[User:MoarLurk|MoarLurk]] 04:45, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

:*When you fill out the profile, there's a drop-down menu of various religion choices, plus an open field to fill in whatever you want if your choice isn't in the menu. Chris picked "None" from the drop-down menu because Methodist isn't one of the options offered, then typed Christian/Methodist in the open field. If he'd left the drop-down alone, it probably wouldn't have displayed anything. So he hasn't abandoned his faith or anything, he just fucked up filling out a web form. [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 04:47, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
::*Diaken's explination makes the most sense. Which is kind of a shame because it's also the most boring. I don't think my initial "wants to show up on searches for atheist" guess is too far off though.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 04:55, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

:*Chris hardly even knows what Atheism is, and from what we gather he has as much of an irrational hatred of Atheists as he does with Homosexuals and the like. --[[User:Thorgnzorrg|Thorgnzorrg]] 19:57, 6 April 2010 (UTC)

Oh it's elementary, Watson. He's of no religion now (fuck abstinency!), but he's still Christian... Weston Chandler! --[[User:Sonijew is back|Sonijew is back]] 15:10, 7 April 2010 (UTC)

*YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH! --[[User:DStecks|DStecks]] 21:31, 7 April 2010 (UTC)

== Earlier ad ==

Oldfags may recall Chris had an add through here before, which may have been documented somewhere on the ED page if you dig. I doubt anyone archived it though, and I do recall it was legit though it was eventually hacked to make it seem like Chris was gay and how his favorite food was pickles, etc. This should be referenced somewhere though. --[[User:Champthom|Champthom]] 07:58, 6 April 2010 (UTC)
*Yeah, here's where the ad used to be: http://charlottesville.selectalternatives.com/gyrobase/Personals/Profile?person=oid%3A239898 [[User:Dkaien|Dkaien]] 16:00, 6 April 2010 (UTC)