https://sonichu.com/w/api.php?action=feedcontributions&feedformat=atom&user=IBAndersonCWCki - User contributions [en]2026-06-01T04:25:05ZUser contributionsMediaWiki 1.37.6https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:IBAnderson&diff=182728User:IBAnderson2015-02-14T05:58:00Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>Well, it looks like they might be putting Chris Chan away. It was nice while it lasted, but we all knew it couldn't go on forever... <br />
Also, I wrote a Christmas carol in memory of the virgin with rage:<br />
<br />
At [[14 Branchland Court]], in Ruckersville V-A<br />
lives a [[pedofork]], who sits around all day.<br />
He doesn't have a [[monthly tugboat|job]], his name is [[Chris Chan|Christian C.]]<br />
And he wants a cute [[gal-pal]], who is [[boyfriend free girl|boyfriend-free]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
[[Sonichu]] is [[homos|gay]].<br />
[[Bob]] cut down the internet,<br />
and then [[Clyde Cash]] got away, hey!<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Chris Chan's very [[obesity|strong]], so don't get in his way,<br />
he sometimes sings his song, "It's OK to be gay" [[It's UGH!|Gah!]]<br />
He breaks all kinds of [[Chris and the law|laws]], he has a [[creepy stare]]<br />
Casting [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|Curse-ye-hame-has]] for [[Christian's name change|God and the Bear]]<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
He doesn't like the [[trolls]], despises [[Asperchu]]<br />
the internet he told, [[Michael Snyder|Mike Snyder]]'s a Jew.<br />
[[Captain's log]] Stardate, December 25th<br />
New year's eve we'll celebrate, with Fanta and [[semen|jizz]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Well, that was it, peace and except for those trolls who despise and harass me, have a good safe holiday. :)<br />
<br />
{{Americunt}}<br />
{{White}}<br />
{{Catholic}}<br />
{{Hex-Box}}<br />
{{Warrior}}<br />
{{Virgin with rage}}<br />
{{Desi}}<br />
{{Irish}}<br />
{{AlecBensonLeary}}<br />
{{ClydeCash}}<br />
{{MartialArtist}}</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:IBAnderson&diff=151432User:IBAnderson2011-11-08T03:59:41Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>Well, it looks like they might be putting Chris Chan away. It was nice while it lasted, but we all knew it couldn't go on forever... <br />
Also, I wrote a Christmas carol in memory of the virgin with rage:<br />
<br />
At [[14 Branchland Court]], in Ruckersville V-A<br />
lives a [[pedofork]], who sits around all day.<br />
He doesn't have a [[monthly tugboat|job]], his name is [[Chris Chan|Christian C.]]<br />
And he wants a cute [[gal-pal]], who is [[boyfriend free girl|boyfriend-free]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
[[Sonichu]] is [[homos|gay]].<br />
[[Bob]] cut down the internet,<br />
and then [[Clyde Cash]] got away, hey!<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Chris Chan's very [[obesity|strong]], so don't get in his way,<br />
he sometimes sings his song, "It's OK to be gay" [[It's UGH!|Gah!]]<br />
He breaks all kinds of [[Chris and the law|laws]], he has a [[creepy stare]]<br />
Casting [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|Curse-ye-hame-has]] for [[Christian's name change|God and the Bear]]<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
He doesn't like the [[trolls]], despises [[Asperchu]]<br />
the internet he told, [[Michael Snyder|Mike Snyder]]'s a Jew.<br />
[[Captain's log]] Stardate, December 25th<br />
New year's eve we'll celebrate, with Fanta and [[semen|jizz]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Well, that was it, peace and except for those trolls who despise and harass me, have a good safe holiday. :)<br />
<br />
{{Americunt}}<br />
{{White}}<br />
{{Catholic}}<br />
{{Hex-Box}}<br />
{{Hero}}<br />
{{Virgin with rage}}<br />
{{Desi}}<br />
{{Irish}}<br />
{{AlecBensonLeary}}<br />
{{ClydeCash}}<br />
{{MartialArtist}}</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Surfshack_Tito_(troll)&diff=143648Surfshack Tito (troll)2011-08-10T18:52:44Z<p>IBAnderson: /* Transcript */</p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:Tito 300.gif|frame|It's easy to see what the Wallflower fell for, isn't it?]]<br />
<br />
'''Surfshack Tito''' (also known as [[Calling Out|Don]]) is a mysterious [[troll]] who first emerged in early [[March 2010]]. His arrival was reminiscent of the rise of [[Jack Thaddeus]] in the summer of 2009. Like Jack, he first made his mark by hacking [[Chris]]' [[PS3|PlayStation Network]] accounts.<br />
<br />
The nickname "Surfshack Tito" is a reference to the corpulent surf-shop owner from the [[Wikipedia: Nickelodeon| Nickelodeon]] kids' cartoon ''[[Wikipedia:Rocket Power|Rocket Power]]''. During the exchanges with Chris, most of them from Tito are ended with a Tito-styled word of wisdom. The choice to go with the name is most likely inspired by an infamous copypasta about Tito.<br />
<br />
Based on Chris's insults towards Tito in the e-mails and videos, it was assumed that Chris believes that [[Chris and Reality|the actual Tito from ''Rocket Power'' is trolling him.]] However, the truth is that the image attached to an e-mail shows a photoshopped image of the Wallflower standing next to a [[niggo|really tall dark guy]]. The photo is left out of this article due to an agreement with [[the Wallflower]].<br />
<br />
==Tito in Chris's videos==<br />
Chris first addressed Tito in a [[Surfshack Tito (video)|video]] released on 2 March 2010. His comments were brief and cryptic. Chris merely referred to Tito by name, threatened him with doom in his nightmares, and delivered a [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha#Execution_and_effect|Curse Shot]] attack.<br />
<br />
Shortly afterward, [[Clyde Cash]] explained that Tito had hacked Chris's PSN account a few days prior, in late February. This revelation was accompanied by another info-dump concerning Chris's ongoing [[List of Chris's PSN game downloads|downloadable]] [[List of Chris's PSN video downloads|content]] spending spree.<br />
<br />
A week later, trolls discovered the identity of [[the Wallflower]], throwing Chris into a flailing rage. Initially, Chris seemed to blame Clyde for the breakup of his latest one-sided relationship, but on 14 March 2010, he released a [[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!|video]] suggesting that he viewed Tito as the culprit. In that clip, he declares: "Tito. Listen to me, you son of a bitch. Your-your days are numbered." Threats involving a shillelagh and Chris's deadly [[pocket knife]] followed.<br />
<br />
Tito apparently kept up the pressure on Chris through the next few days of March 2010. On 18 March, Chris released [[Chris Drops the N-Bomb|yet another threatening video]], in which he accused Tito of stealing the Wallflower from him, called him a "womanizing rapist" and a "[[Man in the Pickle Suit|pickle-suited]] [[nigger]]", and alluded to e-mails he had received from Tito (their contents unspecified, but Chris definitely didn't like them).<br />
<br />
However, since the end of the Wallflower [[saga]], Surfshack Tito has slipped from Chris's consciousness and has not made any further appearances in Chris's videos. He is, however, an important figure behind the [[Fashion_Square_Mall#Chris_captured_on_video|August 2010 videotaped encounter of Chris at Fashion Square Mall]].<br />
<br />
[[Image:Surfshack Tito.jpg|thumb|Tito in real life, enjoying a ukulele after another successful trolling plan.]]<br />
<br />
In August 2011, Chris returned after a hiatus from YouTube to [[Calling Out|announce]] that he had received documents which revealed Tito's real identity. Referring to him as Don, Chris demanded a public apology from Tito for [[Wikipedia:PlayStation_Network_outage|hacking the PSN]], and $1,000 among other things.<br />
<br />
==E-mails with Chris==<br />
{{main|Surfshack Tito E-mails}}<br />
During mid-March 2010, Tito exchanged several e-mails with Chris, baiting him with regard to the revelation of the Wallflower's identity and other subjects. Their conversations reveal that Chris was aware of his gal-pal's interest in gay slash fiction, and was apparently willing to look past it (the quest for [[china]] trumping all other considerations). The e-mails also feature Chris employing the word "nigger" with [[Chris and race|great enthusiasm]]. Note that Surfshack Tito is actually Hawaiian, not a [[niggo]].<br />
<br />
Between late August and early September 2010, [[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails|Tito resurfaced]] in Chris's failed plot to scam him and Clyde Cash. Their e-mails reveal Chris's intentions behind destroying his PS3 and waiting at the mall; he sought a bounty of $9,001 towards his PS3's destruction and very poorly attempted to cheat Tito and Clyde out of the money.<br />
<br />
== Tito's official response to Chris ==<br />
In a clear attempt to [[Calling Out|meet Chris's demands]], Tito produced a video in which he explains what lengths he is prepared to go to in order to prevent Chris from releasing his personal information. This video was acknowledged by Chris the following day.<br />
=== Video ===<br />
{{quote|This is official, true, and honest.}}<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Tito's official response to Chris<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|uZhlo94cMNk}}<br />
| stardate = 9 [[August 2011]]<br />
| subject = <br />
| style = {{Reason|text}}<br />
| saga = {{Surfshack Tito|text}}<br />
| shirt = <br />
}}<br />
<br />
=== Transcript ===<br />
Heh, hey little cuz, uh, or uh Christian Weston Chandler if you prefer. It's me, uh, Tito, or Don, um. Listen man, I got some sand in the potato salad this time you caught me cuz. I, I admit it. I sold the security files of Sony to the hackers and I'll, uh I'll get you the money! I'll get you the thousand dollars and the interest! Just don't, just don't release that video, eh with the picture of me, just don't do anymore man! I'll, uh, I'll do anything, I'll be your slave for a whole week if I have to. I got people after me I can't have them finding out who I am, just, just be a cuz, man, and, and, and, and don't let me down. I won't let you down.<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Jack Thaddeus]]<br />
*[[Surfshack Tito (video)]]<br />
*[[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!]]<br />
*[[Chris Drops the N-Bomb]]<br />
*[[Surfshack Tito E-mails]]<br />
*[[Clyde and Tito PS3 E-mails]]<br />
<br />
{{Trolls}}<br />
{{DEFAULTSORT:Tito, Surfshack}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Trolls]]<br />
[[Category: Surfshack Tito Saga]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User_talk:IBAnderson&diff=142099User talk:IBAnderson2011-07-23T17:32:59Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>Keep fighting the good fight, Ian! Never give up! --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 02:22, 14 May 2010 (UTC)<br />
<br />
Thanks for the encouragement! It's nice to know I have fans to help me defeat this slanderous imposter. Perhaps I'll make an account on da Youtube one of these days and <s>troll</s> contact him through my videos. --[[User:IBAnderson|IBAnderson]] 10:27 14, May 2010 (UTC)<br />
<br />
*Now we're talking, down with the imposter! --[[User:Ronichu|Ronichu]] 02:33, 14 May 2010 (UTC)<br />
<br />
Hi Ian B. Anderson ^0^ <br />
The REAL IBA!!!<br />
you seem like an awesome person!! If you need any help with stuffsies, just ask me [[User:BabyNeko|BabyNeko]]<br />
<br />
== For your information ==<br />
<br />
One, "transsexual" is written with two S's. Two, it denotes a desire to ''be'' a different sex, not just dress like it, which Chris hasn't expressed. And three, it's not a negative quality and shouldn't be listed alongside all those negative qualities Chris has. - [[User:LucidFox|LucidFox]] 23:54, 22 July 2011 (PDT)<br />
* This is true. A more accurate definition of Chris' behaviour would be "genderqueer", or a lesbian trapped in a male's body. He wants to get in touch with his feminine side while also craving sweet China. Oh and hi, Chris. [[User:Nullity|Nullity]] 02:01, 23 July 2011 (PDT)<br />
* As a note I didn't mean you are Chris. I meant for when he reads this and rages about "genderqueer" [[User:Nullity|Nullity]] 02:06, 23 July 2011 (PDT)<br />
*Yeah, but I doubt Chris is ever going to read this discussion anyway. --[[User:IBAnderson|IBAnderson]] 1:32 23, July 2011 (UTC)</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Christian_Weston_Chandler&diff=142049Christian Weston Chandler2011-07-22T18:55:12Z<p>IBAnderson: It's pretty safe to say Chris has gender identity disorder</p>
<hr />
<div>''This article is about Christian Weston Chandler, the Internet's favorite autistic manchild. For all other uses please visit [[Christian Weston Chandler (disambiguation)]].<br>''<br />
''"Christian" redirects here. For Chandler's view on Christianty, see [[Chris and Religion]].''<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Honest}}<br />
<br />
{| class="infobox" style="width: 21em; font-size: 90%;"<br />
|-<br />
! colspan="2" | Chandler Family<br />
|-<br />
| colspan="2" | [[Image:0782-CWCSpread.JPG|300px]]<br />
|-<br />
! colspan="2" |Christian Weston Chandler<br />
|-<br />
| '''Birth Name'''<br />
| Christopher Weston Chandler<br />
|-<br />
| '''Full Name'''<br />
| "Christopher" Christian "Ricardo" Weston Chandler<br />
|-<br />
| '''Nicknames'''<br />
| Chris-chan<br>Chris Chan<br>Chris Tran<br>Ricardo Weston Chandler<br>CWC<br>[[Ian Brandon Anderson]]<br>Solid Chris<br>Chrissy<br>[[JenkinsJinkies|Junior Jenkins]]<br>[[Carlos Chantor]]<br> [[Tomgirl]]<br>''[[Homos|Homo]] virginicus''<br>[[Jackie_Chat_6|Chunky Monkey Man]]<br />
|-<br />
| '''Date of Birth'''<br />
| [[Birthday|24 February]] [[1982]]<br />
|-<br />
| '''Gender'''<br />
| Male (1982-2011)<br>[[Tomgirl]] (2011-present)<br />
|-<br />
| '''Nationality'''<br />
| [[United States of America|American]]<br />
|-<br />
| '''Race'''<br />
| [[Chris and race|White]]<br />
|-<br />
| '''Height'''<br />
| 5'10" (1.78 m)<br />
|-<br />
| '''Weight'''<br />
| Approximately [[WeighIn|216 lbs. (98.2 kg)]] <br />
|-<br />
| '''Parents'''<br />
| [[Bob]]<br /> [[Barbara]]<br />
|-<br />
| '''Education'''<br />
| [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] ([[CADD]])<br />
|-<br />
| '''Occupation(s)'''<br />
| Freelance comic book artist/writer/videogame designer (unpublished)<br>[[Wendy's]] employee ([[2001]]) <br>[[Cutco]] salesman ([[2003]])<br>Male escort ([[2010]], unpaid)<br />
|-<br />
|}<br />
<br />
'''Christian Weston Chandler''' (''né'' '''Christopher Weston Chandler''' on 24 February [[1982]]), is a [[Chris and Sex|perverse]], [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|disgusting]], [[Chris and the law|quarrelsome]], [[Chris and anger|mean-spirited]], [[Death threats|spiteful]], [[Chris and his Ego|narcissistic]], [[homos|homophobic]], [[Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia|transexual]], [[Women's Rights|sexist]], [[niggos|racist]], [[Obesity|overweight]], [[Chris and reality|delusional]], [[Autism Tutorial Extra|psychotic]], [[Chris and hypocrisy|hypocritical]], [[Semen#Recycling|semen drinking]], [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 6|stubborn]], [[Chris and religion|heretical]], [[art|completely]] and [[writing|utterly]] [[music|untalented]], "[[autism|high-functioning autistic]]" [[virgin with rage|virgin]] man-child, and [[Things Chris has ripped off|creator]] of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]], a [[fail|brilliant]] crossover of [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] and [[Pikachu]] - sorry, [[Chris and copyright|original creation]] - starring in his own self-titled [[Sonichu (comic)|online comic book]].<br />
<br />
His adult life has been largely defined by his goal of developing his webcomic ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' into a hit video game franchise and his [[Love Quest]] to obtain a "[[boyfriend-free girl|boyfriend-free]], 18-[''my current age'']-year old, caring, [[tobacky|smoke-free]], [[alcohol|non-alcoholic]] [[Racism|white]] girl" to make into a "[[sweetheart from the Ground-Up|sweetheart from the ground-up]]." <br />
<br />
In late [[2007]], he became [[Internet]]-famous when he caught the attention of [[4chan]] and [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]. The initial fascination was spurred on by his willingness to wear a homemade [[Sonichu medallion]] in public, his laughably [[Chris and Art|childlike artwork]] about his unoriginal Sonic recolor, and his history of loitering in [[Attraction Locations|public places]] while literally holding up a [[sign]] asking women to talk to him. His reaction to the ensuing mockery led to even greater scrutiny of his life, revealing still more disturbing facts about him. <br />
<br />
Yes, friends, it gets far worse. <br />
<br />
==Aliases==<br />
[[Image:093-CWCtoon.jpg|thumb|left|100px|ORIGINAL IDENTITY. <br>DO NOT [[Liquid Chris|STEAL]].]]<br />
Much like the Devil, Christian Weston Chandler goes by many names. He was born Christopher Weston Chandler, but [[Christopher's name change|changed]] to "Christian" at the behest of the "[[Leonard Bearstein|bear conductor]]". In either case, he answers to "Chris" and "Chris-Chan". Unusually, Chris will often refer to himself by his full name, or for even greater accuracy "Christopher Christian Weston Chandler". He is unusually proud of his initials "CWC" and often incorporates them into his creations and various puns on the word "quick".<br />
<br />
Chris's nickname in his high school [[Spanish]] classes was "Ricardo", and to this day he translates his own name to "Ricardo Weston Chandler" when writing or speaking in Spanish. At times he will literally announce himself as "Christopher Christian 'Ricardo' Weston Chandler", or variants thereof, to precisely identify himself.<br />
<br />
He occasionally uses the names of his characters, most notably his evil twin, [[Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc]] and of course [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]]. In his comics, Chris has the ability to transform into a superheroic hedgehog himself, named [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]].<br />
<br />
The only names commonly used to refer to Chris which he did not himself invent are "Chrissy" (popularized by [[Arjen Van Dierten]]) and [[Ian Brandon Anderson]] (popularized by [[Liquid Chris]]). Less notably, there is also the seldom-used "Solid Chris", used by some to differentiate him from Liquid in the tradition of a [[Metal Gear Solid|certain video game series]].<br />
<br />
{{-}}<br />
<br />
==Overview==<br />
[[Image:CWCBitchesDunno.jpg|thumb|It's all right, Chris, we already know since you annoy us to death about it.]]<br />
<br />
Chris is a timid, [[chris_and_his_ego|self-absorbed]] little man who has been allowed - by [[Bob Chandler|his]] [[Barb|parents]] and/or his [[autism]] - to eternally live like a child, amassing [[toys]] and [[video games]] into a single [[room]] in his parents' [[14 Branchland Court|house]]. Now approaching thirty, he is so comfortable in his pitiful existence that he refuses to conform to the rules of society, such as "you have to bathe regularly," "you can't sit in a store all day waiting for people to talk to you," and "if you keep [[dirty crapped briefs|shitting your pants]] you should be more careful when you think you're just going to fart." Although the public school system originally forced society and Chris to put up with one another, Chris is now free to stay indoors and not do anything he doesn't want to do. Accordingly, Chris has never held a steady [[Chris's resume|job]] or had any meaningful relationship with a woman (or anyone of any gender, for that matter). <br />
<br />
Chris is completely obsessed with his character [[Sonichu]], to the point that he hand-crafted several [[medallions]] in the shape of Sonichu and related characters. Between February [[2004]] and [[March 2010]], Chris was rarely seen or photographed without one of these totems, even wearing them in his [[:Image:License.jpg|driver's license photo]] and to his [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|college]] graduation. At the same time, he is absolutely convinced that everyone wants to learn all about Sonichu, and that the only reason [[Nintendo]], Sega, and [[Sony]] haven't approached him about making Sonichu games is that they're either trying to be tough negotiators, or that his chances are being ruined by [[trolls]] working in the companies. The medallion returned in [[September 2010]].<br />
<br />
[[Image:Chris-Straw.jpg|thumb|left|Why do we get the feeling that he wants to suck a [[duck]]?]]<br />
<br />
[[Chris and art|Chris cannot draw. At all.]] Every single person on the planet could draw better at age seven than Chris could at age 23, when the hand-drawn [[Sonichu 0|premiere issue]] of ''Sonichu'' was released. What makes it even funnier is that his art is the closest thing he has to an actual talent.<br />
<br />
Chris is the dangerous combination of the emotional maturity of a six-year-old and the [[Chris and sex|sexual]] maturity of a young adult male. As a result, he has little understanding or appreciation of women. To him, all women are little more than objects that could potentially provide for him emotionally, sexually, and financially. It appears that everything he knows about sex has been learned from sex ed classes and porn. For some reason, he believes he knows more about sex and women than whoever he is talking to (such as women who have had sex), which inevitably results in hilarity.<br />
<br />
Chris absolutely hates [[homos|gay men]], and communicates this with such intensity that observers are easily convinced he's simply terrified of becoming gay himself. He cannot bear to look at another man's [[pickle|penis]], and he stares at [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon]] to keep himself straight. Oh, he also [[recycling|swallows his own semen]] and [[Sports bra photo series|wears a bra]]. Surprisingly, however, his homophobia seems to have little basis in his religious beliefs, as he had not noticed Leviticus 18:22, which condemns homosexuality, until he saw it on a 2009 episode of ''[[Family Guy]]''.<br />
{{clear}}<br />
<br />
== Early life ==<br />
<br />
===Childhood and adolescence===<br />
[[Image:Lapse.gif|left]]<br />
<br />
[[Image:0147-CWCsMilkcapsAcrossTime.jpg|240px|thumb|Evolution (or decay, depending upon how you see things) of a Chris-chan...in [[Wikipedia:Pogs|POG]] form (yes, those are homemade POGS). Top: Chris '94, '95, '96. Bottom: '97, '98', '99.]]<br />
<br />
Chris claims his first word, "[[Fail|monkey]]", was spoken at six weeks old,<ref name="Wikipedia early">[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile#His Early Years - Birth to 1992]]</ref> and he remains proud of this feat well into his twenties regardless of how obviously unlikely and physically impossible it is to be true - the language centres in the human brain literally cannot grasp English at six weeks, disregarding infantile vocal cord.<br />
<br />
An [[abusive babysitter]], who was alone with Christopher every day for years,<ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-3.PNG|6 March 2007 email from Cole to Chris, page 3]]</ref> allegedly locked him in a room at an early age.<ref name="Wikipedia early" /> Chris apparently misses the irony in the fact the he now locks himself in a [[Chris's room|room]]. He once identified this confinement as the source of his autism. Between the ages of one and seven, Chris did not speak at all, and had to visit [[James Madison University]] for speech therapy.<br />
<br />
During the [[1980s]], Christopher was playmates with [[Sarah Hammer]]. One day, she convinced him that Casper the Friendly Ghost lived in the crawlspace under her house, and when he crawled in there to look, she locked him in,<ref>[[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares#Memories of childhood|Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares, page 4]]</ref> beginning Chris's lifelong career of getting trolled. Apparently, he doesn't hold any hard feelings over it (possibly just because she's a girl — if a guy did that to him, Chris would vow vengeance).<br />
<br />
In [[1989]], noted furry conductor Leonard Bearstein misheard Christopher's first name and called him "Christian", which convinced Christopher to later have his name [[Christopher's name change|legally changed]].<br />
<br />
Chris spent the [[1990s|1990-1991]] school year in the fourth grade at [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]], until his parents pulled him out of classes over a mysterious dispute. Chris claims that he was forcefully restrained by the school's faculty<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007]]</ref> and that he was made to sit on the lap of the [[Bruce Johnson|principal]], an experience that supposedly inspired his homophobia. It's possible that Chris's opinions about these events are colored more by his parents' attitudes than his own memories. The issue went to court, with Greene County seeking to have Chris sent to a "special school". Chris was home-schooled through the fifth grade during these proceedings. When his family exhausted all legal recourse, Chris and his father relocated to [[Richmond]] so that Chris could continue his education in a different school system, starting with the sixth grade in fall 1992.<ref name="Wikipedia early" /><br />
<br />
At age 11, Chris entered and won the [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes]]. On his twelfth birthday, he enjoyed a $1,000 shopping spree as his prize. Local news coverage of the event focused on Chris's autism, regarding the contest win as a more worthy accomplishment due to his mental condition. Chris put footage from this newscast on [[YouTube]] long before he was known to general public, and it remains the most solid evidence that he is not [[IBAChandler|some elaborate troll]]. This incident is often cited as the beginning of Chris's tendency to leverage his autism for special treatment, as well as his fascination with toys and video games at the expense of more mature pursuits. It has led Chris to constantly enter contests in hopes of winning big (or else [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|becoming infuriated]] when he loses).<br />
<br />
<center><gallery><br />
Image:0002-BabyChristopher.jpg|Even as a baby, he was unusually ugly. Looks kind of like Baby Selwyn from ''[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Braindead_%28film%29 Braindead]''.<br />
Image:0003-ChristopherApr1985.jpg|Age 3, actually a pretty cute kid.<br />
Image:0001-ChristopherInSchool.jpg|Holding a prototype [[Sonichu Balls|Sonichu ball]].<br />
Image:0043-YoungChristopher2.jpg|[[Chris and fashion|Chris's taste in clown shirts begins]], coupled with his infamous "deer in headlights" [[The Creepy Stare|stare]].<br />
</gallery></center><br />
<br />
{{collapsible<br />
|More of young Christian<br />
|<gallery><br />
Image:0005-ChristopherWBigShirt.jpg<br />
Image:0006-Christopher6-1986.jpg<br />
Image:0007-Christopher12-1986.jpg<br />
Image:0010-ChristopherChristmas1.jpg<br />
Image:0013-ChristopherWFivel.jpg<br />
Image:0015-ChristopherWPillow.jpg<br />
Image:0016-ChristopherByTV.jpg<br />
Image:0017-Christopher'sFavoriteChair.jpg<br />
Image:0018-ChristopherWRootBeer1.jpg<br />
Image:0019-ChristopherWRootBeer2.jpg<br />
Image:0020-ChristopherWCar1.jpg<br />
Image:0021-ChristopherWCar2.jpg<br />
Image:0022-ChristopherWithWhat1.jpg<br />
Image:0023-ChristopherWithWhat2.jpg<br />
Image:0024-ChristopherTurns5.jpg<br />
Image:0030-ChristopherWSunglasses.jpg<br />
Image:0031-1-Chris on Pony.jpg<br />
Image:0035-ChritopherArmPaint.jpg<br />
Image:0044-YoungChristopher1.jpg<br />
Image:0047-ChristopherApr1991.jpg<br />
Image:0048-1-Sad Chris.jpg<br />
Image:0048-ChristopherSept1991.jpg<br />
Image:0049-ChristopherFacePaint.jpg<br />
Image:0059-ChristopherWBat.jpg<br />
Image:0072-Chrisian&Santa.jpg<br />
Image:0076-ChristianWTrain.jpg<br />
Image:0086-Christmas95-1.jpg<br />
Image:0087-Christmas95-2.jpg<br />
Image:0088-Christmas95-3.jpg<br />
</gallery>}}<br />
<br />
[[Image:0240-ChristianCBBall97.jpg|120px|thumb|left|CWC the water boy. PRO TIP: Don't drink anything from one of Chris's [[fapcup|cups]].]]<br />
<br />
[[Image:CWC12.png|120px|thumb|Hard to believe, but this photo has not been airbrushed to perfection.]]<br />
<br />
Chris spent much of his time in [[Manchester High School|high school]] playing video games at home, reading R.L. Stine horror novels, and hanging out with his "[[gal pals]]" and "[[Joseph Herring|friend]]" at school. It was at this time that he first put his "creative talents" to use, with the inventions of [[Bionic the Hedgehog]] and Sonichu.<ref>[[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]], [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_7/Page_22]</ref> Chris was on the [[honor roll]] and acquired the true source of his powers, his [[high school ring]].<br />
<br />
Because the art award he wanted was given to someone else, Chris cried like a little bitch during his [[Manchester High School#Graduation|high school graduation]]. He honestly thought he deserved the award more than anyone else because he worked on it ''so hard'' in spite of his autism. Another reason for his sorrow was his fear that he might soon have to grow up and start acting like an adult.<ref>[[:Image:0567-GraduationNote2.jpg|DVD, graduation note 2]]</ref><br />
<br />
Since leaving high school and the happiest years of his life, Chris has been unable to progress in any aspect of his life. He remains trapped in a childish, Year [[2000]] [[Time Void|time-warp]], as he believes that whatever he was doing at the time was what helped him attract female companions. That his high school gal-pals have moved on and married real adult men with careers is of little consequence to him.<br />
<br />
{{collapsible<br />
|Chris's award-winning art work<br />
|<gallery perrow="5"><br />
<br />
Image:444-MecheFox.JPG|This should win a prize.<br />
Image:445-SonicTotem.JPG|Not creepy.<br />
Image:470-CWCCoilPot.JPG|Chris's Like Like.<br />
Image:475-RelaxingCWC1.JPG|Chris relaxing. Not scary at all.<br />
Image:476-RelaxingCWC2.JPG|Uh...<br />
Image:471-ChristophersLeatherFace.JPG|Chris calls this his "leather face". Apparently, he's never seen ''Texas Chainsaw Massacre''.<br />
Image:467-CWCPlate.JPG|This plate helps you lose weight - look at it and you'll want to vomit.<br />
Image:doorfish.jpg|You put this over your door to keep away would be thieves.<br />
</gallery>}}<br />
<br />
===Adult adventures===<br />
[[Image:0781-CWCspdbed.JPG|thumb|One of Chris's promotional images for his [[Love Quest]]. Many women have gouged their eyes out after seeing it.]]<br />
<br />
Chris's entry into [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] probably eased his inability to cope with life after high school. He took courses in [[CADD|Computer Aided Drafting and Design]] and began spending more time on ''Sonichu'', launching a [[Sonichu's News Dash|retarded newsletter]] and circulating it on the PVCC campus. Over time, he began losing touch with his gal-pals from high school, and he presumably found the junior college crowd less willing to humor him and his bullshit.<br />
<br />
Chris says he decided he needed a [[sweetheart]] in February [[2003]]. Possibly driven by his discovery that his old friend [[Sarah Hammer]] had begun dating [[Wes Iseli]], Chris started his [[Love Quest]] in earnest that summer. However, he quickly found that every girl he talked to had a boyfriend...allegedly. Chris soon became neurotic about the "[[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor]]" and began employing various bizarre methods to attract women without actually having to approach them or speak to them.<br />
<br />
Chris's most celebrated technique involved sitting in one place (or pacing back and forth) for hours, holding a [[sign]] that read "I am a (my age then)-Year Old, Single Male, seeking an 18-(my age then)-Year Old, Single Female Companion." Amazingly, this strategy accomplished nothing beyond getting him into trouble with various [[jerkops|authority]] [[manajerks|figures]] who believed that he was loitering and/or soliciting sex. Chris was particularly traumatized by a series of confrontations with the [[PVCC]] dean [[Mary Lee Walsh]] over his attraction techniques, resulting in an ongoing, completely one-sided blood feud. <br />
<br />
After a series of confrontations featuring increasingly bizarre and threatening behavior on Chris's part, Walsh expelled him for one year in [[2004]]. He eventually returned, however, obtaining an associate's degree in May [[2006]]. <br />
<br />
After college, Chris promptly dropped out of society, devoting his life to finding a [[boyfriend-free girl]], drawing ''Sonichu'', [[masturbation|masturbating]], and using his [[monthly tugboat|welfare money]] to buy video games and [[sex toys]].<br />
<br />
[[Image:156-CWCMegan1.jpg|thumb|left|He can smell fear.]]<br />
<br />
In [[2005]], Chris met [[Megan Schroeder]] at a [[Game Place|local game and card shop]]. Megan proved unusual in that she was willing to talk to Chris for more than five minutes. The two quickly became close friends, although Megan claimed to have recently endured a bad break-up and refused to entertain Chris's obvious romantic interest. Chris, being totally smooth with women due to countless hours of studying them in porn and [[anime]], believed that the key to turning Megan's platonic feelings romantic was to make inappropriate advances toward her until she had to tell him to stop touching her.<br />
<br />
In the summer of [[2007]], Chris put it all on the line by entering the [[PaRappa the Rapper Contest|''PaRappa the Rapper'' Contest]] so that he could win prizes and a trip for two to Seattle, which formed the centerpiece of his plan to finally score with Megan. The contest ended in disaster for Chris, as he lost to the dreaded [[Adam Stackhouse]] and finally learned that Megan wouldn't have gone with him on the trip even if he had won.<br />
<br />
It was during the Love Quest that Chris was inspired to launch ''Sonichu'', a comic book series featuring his [[Electric-Hedgehog Pokémon]]. Ostensibly, the comic was intended to raise awareness of Chris's unbelievably original character, but within half an issue, the storylines began to revolve around the frankly more compelling saga of Chris's own personal issues.<br />
{{clear}}<br />
<br />
==Discovery==<br />
{{main|2007|2008}}<br />
[[Image:110-SchuSiteIdea2.jpg|thumb|FUCK YEAH!!!]]<br />
<br />
{{quote|Geez, when you have '''me''' facepalming at you, you have got to be pretty bad off.|[http://encyclopediadramatica.ch/David_Gonterman David Gonterman] on Chris.}}<br />
<br />
Chris's rare talent was discovered when he posted an anonymous picture of Sonichu on [[4-cent garbage|4chan]]. It only took a quick Google search of Chris's name to discover the picture's author, and Chris's miserable existence spilled over onto [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] in October 2007. His life was never the same again.<br />
<br />
Upon learning of the "Chris-chan" article on ED, Chris released a single [[Chris Chan's Public Announcement|YouTube video]] attempting to diplomatically convince the site to remove the page. Failing in this, he then spent the next several months [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica|vandalizing]] the article in the vain hope of overwhelming his enemies. This catastrophically backfired as Chris, in an attempt to prove himself as lurid as the [[trolls]], revealed a great deal of embarrassing information, most notably [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|a portrait of himself fingerbanging Megan]] that ruined his most important relationship at the time. By the spring of [[2008]] Chris would be banned from both [[The Game Place|his favorite hangout]] and [[Grace Baptist Church|his parents' church]] for reasons at least partially related to information brought to light by the ED article.<br />
<br />
In August 2008 Chris [[CWC's Second Message|declared]] [[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)|war]] upon Encyclopedia Dramatica in a series of videos, threatening to withhold publication of the upcoming [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]] unless his vast [[fan base]] rallied to force ED to remove the "Chris-chan" article. When ED suffered outages unrelated to this crusade, Chris [[Kudos to the Encyclopedia DramaDestruction|took credit and declared victory]], guaranteeing that he would be under constant fire from trolls for years to come. This began an endless cycle in which Chris would produce [[videos]], comics, and harebrained schemes to attack the trolls, which would in turn encourage more and more trolls to provoke him for his hilarious responses. <br />
<br />
The cycle was briefly disrupted in the fall of 2008 when Chris sent his various [[medallions]] to his [[Blanca Weiss|fake Internet girlfriend]], who immediately destroyed them and broke up with him. This emotional heartbreak and the release of ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]'' reduced Chris's output of videos and other sources of [[lulz]]. At the same time, Encyclopedia Dramatica began cracking down on trolls using Chris's ED page as a forum for discussing him, and in general opinion was divided as to whether it was lulzy or faggy to continue harassing him. The resulting schism led to the creation of numerous websites (such as [[CWCki|this one]] singularly devoted to trolling Chris), which only expanded coverage of Chris's hijinks.<br />
<br />
==Chris today== <br />
{{main|2008|2009|2010|2011}}<br />
[[File:Ecp00066.jpg|thumb|Chris in [[2009]].]]<br />
By late 2008, trolls controlled many aspects of Chris's life by posing as dedicated [[fans]], cartoonish enemies, and prospective business partners. Chris's ego and [[naive]]te readily embraced this world in which every woman wanted to fuck him, and every man was either trying to help him sell ''Sonichu'' products or steal the franchise for their own nefarious goals. Trolls would begin denoting major events in Chris's life as "[[saga]]s" such as the [[Miyamoto]] Saga, the [[Julie]] Saga, the [[Ivy]] Saga, the [[Liquid Chris|Liquid]] Saga, and the [[Asperchu]] Saga. All the while, the [[CWCki]] maintains a constant record of these events, ensuring that Chris cannot selectively ignore his own history.<br />
<br />
[[File:Personalprofile.jpg|thumb|left|[[OkCupid|Hello]], [[The Hook Cafe|ladies]][[Carlos Chantor|!]]]]<br />
<br />
Following his disastrous failure to woo [[The Wallflower|a real girl]] in March [[2010]], Chris began to realize what anyone else would have figured out a long time ago: his toxic [[Internet]] presence is having a detrimental effect upon his real life, and each new video he creates only makes it worse. This appears to be connected to a reduction in his online presence, and the disappearance of his medallion and his [[Chris and fashion|striped shirts]]. Of late, Chris has become paranoid and has grown more suspicious of anyone online, imploring everyone to meet him in person if they ''really'' want to get to know him. Of course, Chris has [[List of Chris's Lies|a penchant for lying]], so talking to him in real life is as pointless as talking to him online.<br />
<br />
Chris's desire to avoid being fooled has not made him any better at doing it, and the smart money was that sooner or later he'll fall for some "girl" that asks him to [[BlueSpike|shove stuff up his ass]]. No matter how hard Chris tries to avoid the trolling, he will always inexplicably find someone to troll him.<br />
<br />
Today Chris continues to live with his parents, living off the [[monthly tugboat|money]] he receives from the federal government as compensation for his autism, which allegedly renders him incapable of contributing to society. Since he has no job and is usually [[banned]] from any place he visits for more than thirty minutes, Chris has few social outlets and has grown increasingly withdrawn. In his desperate need for attention, he repeatedly returns to the trolls, unwittingly proving that the only people who will put up with him are those who just want him to do something stupid for them to laugh at.<br />
<br />
==Featured fan videos==<br />
<br />
{{collapsible<br />
|Music videos about the life and times of Christian Weston Chandler<br />
|<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = The End of Chris-chan <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|lddgCHYKSG4}}<br />
| Stardate = 2 April 2009<br />
| Maker = [[Vivian Gee]]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = The Rebirth of Chris-chan <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|HSTicQs4Ke8}}<br />
| Stardate = 12 April 2009<br />
| Maker = [[Vivian Gee]]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = Chris-chan is Pitiful <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|gsbzB26sQwk}}<br />
| Stardate = 2 August 2009<br />
| Maker = CreepyMcCreep<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = Resident Chris-chan III: Dating Ground <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|8rRi90wfvHI}}<br />
| Stardate = 1 October 2009<br />
| Maker = MewLine<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info =<br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = IICHH-TIPM - The 503 Faces of Chris-chan<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|YHfZ9XCMUQQ }}<br />
| Stardate = 13 October 2009<br />
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/tehcosmicexplorer08 tehcosmicexplorer08]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = CWC ~ A Sad Story<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|DxAhBoYfWy4}}<br />
| Stardate = 20 November 2009<br />
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/IBAClydeCash IBAClydeCash]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = "My Name Is Christian Weston Chandler" Theatrical Trailer <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|TQfvFw1GMXA}}<br />
| Stardate = 8 December 2009<br />
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/wtfdavemustaine wtfdavemustaine]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = CWC's Show Must Go On!<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|HZqqFUeoaEg }}<br />
| Stardate = 12 December 2009<br />
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/Secretevilguy Secretevilguy]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = The CWCville Show <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|rDyg8bxeyTM}}<br />
| Stardate = 23 December 2009<br />
| Maker = BigBlackPony<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = When Chris-Chan's Gone <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|DE2OOsKrvoU}}<br />
| Stardate = 3 January 2010<br />
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/tehcosmicexplorer08 tehcosmicexplorer08]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
* [[Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)]] - Chris's depiction of himself within his own comics.<br />
* [[Chris-chan Sonichu]] - Chris's furry alter ego.<br />
* [[:Category:DVD slideshow images|Hundreds of personal photographs]] assembled for use in Chris's autobiographical [[DVD]].<br />
* [[User:GodofThunderGodofWar]] - Chris's own CWCki account!<br />
<br />
==References==<br />
{{CWCipedia}}<br />
{{Fan Art|chris=Chris-Chan (fanart)|linkname=Chris}}<br />
<br />
<references /><br />
<br />
{{Chris and|nocat=true}}<br />
{{People}}<br />
{{Timeline|nocat=true}}<br />
<br />
{{DEFAULTSORT:Chandler, Christian Weston}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Chris-chan]]<br />
[[Category:Family Members]]<br />
[[Category:Real people who have appeared in Sonichu comics]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Christian_Weston_Chandler&diff=142048Christian Weston Chandler2011-07-22T18:47:54Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>''This article is about Christian Weston Chandler, the Internet's favorite autistic manchild. For all other uses please visit [[Christian Weston Chandler (disambiguation)]].<br>''<br />
''"Christian" redirects here. For Chandler's view on Christianty, see [[Chris and Religion]].''<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Honest}}<br />
<br />
{| class="infobox" style="width: 21em; font-size: 90%;"<br />
|-<br />
! colspan="2" | Chandler Family<br />
|-<br />
| colspan="2" | [[Image:0782-CWCSpread.JPG|300px]]<br />
|-<br />
! colspan="2" |Christian Weston Chandler<br />
|-<br />
| '''Birth Name'''<br />
| Christopher Weston Chandler<br />
|-<br />
| '''Full Name'''<br />
| "Christopher" Christian "Ricardo" Weston Chandler<br />
|-<br />
| '''Nicknames'''<br />
| Chris-chan<br>Chris Chan<br>Chris Tran<br>Ricardo Weston Chandler<br>CWC<br>[[Ian Brandon Anderson]]<br>Solid Chris<br>Chrissy<br>[[JenkinsJinkies|Junior Jenkins]]<br>[[Carlos Chantor]]<br> [[Tomgirl]]<br>''[[Homos|Homo]] virginicus''<br>[[Jackie_Chat_6|Chunky Monkey Man]]<br />
|-<br />
| '''Date of Birth'''<br />
| [[Birthday|24 February]] [[1982]]<br />
|-<br />
| '''Gender'''<br />
| Male (1982-2011)<br>[[Tomgirl]] (2011-present)<br />
|-<br />
| '''Nationality'''<br />
| [[United States of America|American]]<br />
|-<br />
| '''Race'''<br />
| [[Chris and race|White]]<br />
|-<br />
| '''Height'''<br />
| 5'10" (1.78 m)<br />
|-<br />
| '''Weight'''<br />
| Approximately [[WeighIn|216 lbs. (98.2 kg)]] <br />
|-<br />
| '''Parents'''<br />
| [[Bob]]<br /> [[Barbara]]<br />
|-<br />
| '''Education'''<br />
| [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] ([[CADD]])<br />
|-<br />
| '''Occupation(s)'''<br />
| Freelance comic book artist/writer/videogame designer (unpublished)<br>[[Wendy's]] employee ([[2001]]) <br>[[Cutco]] salesman ([[2003]])<br>Male escort ([[2010]], unpaid)<br />
|-<br />
|}<br />
<br />
'''Christian Weston Chandler''' (''né'' '''Christopher Weston Chandler''' on 24 February [[1982]]), is a [[Chris and Sex|perverse]], [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|disgusting]], [[Chris and the law|quarrelsome]], [[Chris and anger|mean-spirited]], [[Death threats|spiteful]], [[Chris and his Ego|narcissistic]], [[homos|homophobic]], [[Women's Rights|sexist]], [[niggos|racist]], [[Obesity|overweight]], [[Chris and reality|delusional]], [[Autism Tutorial Extra|psychotic]], [[Chris and hypocrisy|hypocritical]], [[Semen#Recycling|semen drinking]], [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 6|stubborn]], [[Chris and religion|heretical]], [[art|completely]] and [[writing|utterly]] [[music|untalented]], "[[autism|high-functioning autistic]]" [[virgin with rage|virgin]] man-child, and [[Things Chris has ripped off|creator]] of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]], a [[fail|brilliant]] crossover of [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] and [[Pikachu]] - sorry, [[Chris and copyright|original creation]] - starring in his own self-titled [[Sonichu (comic)|online comic book]].<br />
<br />
His adult life has been largely defined by his goal of developing his webcomic ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' into a hit video game franchise and his [[Love Quest]] to obtain a "[[boyfriend-free girl|boyfriend-free]], 18-[''my current age'']-year old, caring, [[tobacky|smoke-free]], [[alcohol|non-alcoholic]] [[Racism|white]] girl" to make into a "[[sweetheart from the Ground-Up|sweetheart from the ground-up]]." <br />
<br />
In late [[2007]], he became [[Internet]]-famous when he caught the attention of [[4chan]] and [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]. The initial fascination was spurred on by his willingness to wear a homemade [[Sonichu medallion]] in public, his laughably [[Chris and Art|childlike artwork]] about his unoriginal Sonic recolor, and his history of loitering in [[Attraction Locations|public places]] while literally holding up a [[sign]] asking women to talk to him. His reaction to the ensuing mockery led to even greater scrutiny of his life, revealing still more disturbing facts about him. <br />
<br />
Yes, friends, it gets far worse. <br />
<br />
==Aliases==<br />
[[Image:093-CWCtoon.jpg|thumb|left|100px|ORIGINAL IDENTITY. <br>DO NOT [[Liquid Chris|STEAL]].]]<br />
Much like the Devil, Christian Weston Chandler goes by many names. He was born Christopher Weston Chandler, but [[Christopher's name change|changed]] to "Christian" at the behest of the "[[Leonard Bearstein|bear conductor]]". In either case, he answers to "Chris" and "Chris-Chan". Unusually, Chris will often refer to himself by his full name, or for even greater accuracy "Christopher Christian Weston Chandler". He is unusually proud of his initials "CWC" and often incorporates them into his creations and various puns on the word "quick".<br />
<br />
Chris's nickname in his high school [[Spanish]] classes was "Ricardo", and to this day he translates his own name to "Ricardo Weston Chandler" when writing or speaking in Spanish. At times he will literally announce himself as "Christopher Christian 'Ricardo' Weston Chandler", or variants thereof, to precisely identify himself.<br />
<br />
He occasionally uses the names of his characters, most notably his evil twin, [[Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc]] and of course [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]]. In his comics, Chris has the ability to transform into a superheroic hedgehog himself, named [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]].<br />
<br />
The only names commonly used to refer to Chris which he did not himself invent are "Chrissy" (popularized by [[Arjen Van Dierten]]) and [[Ian Brandon Anderson]] (popularized by [[Liquid Chris]]). Less notably, there is also the seldom-used "Solid Chris", used by some to differentiate him from Liquid in the tradition of a [[Metal Gear Solid|certain video game series]].<br />
<br />
{{-}}<br />
<br />
==Overview==<br />
[[Image:CWCBitchesDunno.jpg|thumb|It's all right, Chris, we already know since you annoy us to death about it.]]<br />
<br />
Chris is a timid, [[chris_and_his_ego|self-absorbed]] little man who has been allowed - by [[Bob Chandler|his]] [[Barb|parents]] and/or his [[autism]] - to eternally live like a child, amassing [[toys]] and [[video games]] into a single [[room]] in his parents' [[14 Branchland Court|house]]. Now approaching thirty, he is so comfortable in his pitiful existence that he refuses to conform to the rules of society, such as "you have to bathe regularly," "you can't sit in a store all day waiting for people to talk to you," and "if you keep [[dirty crapped briefs|shitting your pants]] you should be more careful when you think you're just going to fart." Although the public school system originally forced society and Chris to put up with one another, Chris is now free to stay indoors and not do anything he doesn't want to do. Accordingly, Chris has never held a steady [[Chris's resume|job]] or had any meaningful relationship with a woman (or anyone of any gender, for that matter). <br />
<br />
Chris is completely obsessed with his character [[Sonichu]], to the point that he hand-crafted several [[medallions]] in the shape of Sonichu and related characters. Between February [[2004]] and [[March 2010]], Chris was rarely seen or photographed without one of these totems, even wearing them in his [[:Image:License.jpg|driver's license photo]] and to his [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|college]] graduation. At the same time, he is absolutely convinced that everyone wants to learn all about Sonichu, and that the only reason [[Nintendo]], Sega, and [[Sony]] haven't approached him about making Sonichu games is that they're either trying to be tough negotiators, or that his chances are being ruined by [[trolls]] working in the companies. The medallion returned in [[September 2010]].<br />
<br />
[[Image:Chris-Straw.jpg|thumb|left|Why do we get the feeling that he wants to suck a [[duck]]?]]<br />
<br />
[[Chris and art|Chris cannot draw. At all.]] Every single person on the planet could draw better at age seven than Chris could at age 23, when the hand-drawn [[Sonichu 0|premiere issue]] of ''Sonichu'' was released. What makes it even funnier is that his art is the closest thing he has to an actual talent.<br />
<br />
Chris is the dangerous combination of the emotional maturity of a six-year-old and the [[Chris and sex|sexual]] maturity of a young adult male. As a result, he has little understanding or appreciation of women. To him, all women are little more than objects that could potentially provide for him emotionally, sexually, and financially. It appears that everything he knows about sex has been learned from sex ed classes and porn. For some reason, he believes he knows more about sex and women than whoever he is talking to (such as women who have had sex), which inevitably results in hilarity.<br />
<br />
Chris absolutely hates [[homos|gay men]], and communicates this with such intensity that observers are easily convinced he's simply terrified of becoming gay himself. He cannot bear to look at another man's [[pickle|penis]], and he stares at [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon]] to keep himself straight. Oh, he also [[recycling|swallows his own semen]] and [[Sports bra photo series|wears a bra]]. Surprisingly, however, his homophobia seems to have little basis in his religious beliefs, as he had not noticed Leviticus 18:22, which condemns homosexuality, until he saw it on a 2009 episode of ''[[Family Guy]]''.<br />
{{clear}}<br />
<br />
== Early life ==<br />
<br />
===Childhood and adolescence===<br />
[[Image:Lapse.gif|left]]<br />
<br />
[[Image:0147-CWCsMilkcapsAcrossTime.jpg|240px|thumb|Evolution (or decay, depending upon how you see things) of a Chris-chan...in [[Wikipedia:Pogs|POG]] form (yes, those are homemade POGS). Top: Chris '94, '95, '96. Bottom: '97, '98', '99.]]<br />
<br />
Chris claims his first word, "[[Fail|monkey]]", was spoken at six weeks old,<ref name="Wikipedia early">[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile#His Early Years - Birth to 1992]]</ref> and he remains proud of this feat well into his twenties regardless of how obviously unlikely and physically impossible it is to be true - the language centres in the human brain literally cannot grasp English at six weeks, disregarding infantile vocal cord.<br />
<br />
An [[abusive babysitter]], who was alone with Christopher every day for years,<ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-3.PNG|6 March 2007 email from Cole to Chris, page 3]]</ref> allegedly locked him in a room at an early age.<ref name="Wikipedia early" /> Chris apparently misses the irony in the fact the he now locks himself in a [[Chris's room|room]]. He once identified this confinement as the source of his autism. Between the ages of one and seven, Chris did not speak at all, and had to visit [[James Madison University]] for speech therapy.<br />
<br />
During the [[1980s]], Christopher was playmates with [[Sarah Hammer]]. One day, she convinced him that Casper the Friendly Ghost lived in the crawlspace under her house, and when he crawled in there to look, she locked him in,<ref>[[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares#Memories of childhood|Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares, page 4]]</ref> beginning Chris's lifelong career of getting trolled. Apparently, he doesn't hold any hard feelings over it (possibly just because she's a girl — if a guy did that to him, Chris would vow vengeance).<br />
<br />
In [[1989]], noted furry conductor Leonard Bearstein misheard Christopher's first name and called him "Christian", which convinced Christopher to later have his name [[Christopher's name change|legally changed]].<br />
<br />
Chris spent the [[1990s|1990-1991]] school year in the fourth grade at [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]], until his parents pulled him out of classes over a mysterious dispute. Chris claims that he was forcefully restrained by the school's faculty<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007]]</ref> and that he was made to sit on the lap of the [[Bruce Johnson|principal]], an experience that supposedly inspired his homophobia. It's possible that Chris's opinions about these events are colored more by his parents' attitudes than his own memories. The issue went to court, with Greene County seeking to have Chris sent to a "special school". Chris was home-schooled through the fifth grade during these proceedings. When his family exhausted all legal recourse, Chris and his father relocated to [[Richmond]] so that Chris could continue his education in a different school system, starting with the sixth grade in fall 1992.<ref name="Wikipedia early" /><br />
<br />
At age 11, Chris entered and won the [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes]]. On his twelfth birthday, he enjoyed a $1,000 shopping spree as his prize. Local news coverage of the event focused on Chris's autism, regarding the contest win as a more worthy accomplishment due to his mental condition. Chris put footage from this newscast on [[YouTube]] long before he was known to general public, and it remains the most solid evidence that he is not [[IBAChandler|some elaborate troll]]. This incident is often cited as the beginning of Chris's tendency to leverage his autism for special treatment, as well as his fascination with toys and video games at the expense of more mature pursuits. It has led Chris to constantly enter contests in hopes of winning big (or else [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|becoming infuriated]] when he loses).<br />
<br />
<center><gallery><br />
Image:0002-BabyChristopher.jpg|Even as a baby, he was unusually ugly. Looks kind of like Baby Selwyn from ''[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Braindead_%28film%29 Braindead]''.<br />
Image:0003-ChristopherApr1985.jpg|Age 3, actually a pretty cute kid.<br />
Image:0001-ChristopherInSchool.jpg|Holding a prototype [[Sonichu Balls|Sonichu ball]].<br />
Image:0043-YoungChristopher2.jpg|[[Chris and fashion|Chris's taste in clown shirts begins]], coupled with his infamous "deer in headlights" [[The Creepy Stare|stare]].<br />
</gallery></center><br />
<br />
{{collapsible<br />
|More of young Christian<br />
|<gallery><br />
Image:0005-ChristopherWBigShirt.jpg<br />
Image:0006-Christopher6-1986.jpg<br />
Image:0007-Christopher12-1986.jpg<br />
Image:0010-ChristopherChristmas1.jpg<br />
Image:0013-ChristopherWFivel.jpg<br />
Image:0015-ChristopherWPillow.jpg<br />
Image:0016-ChristopherByTV.jpg<br />
Image:0017-Christopher'sFavoriteChair.jpg<br />
Image:0018-ChristopherWRootBeer1.jpg<br />
Image:0019-ChristopherWRootBeer2.jpg<br />
Image:0020-ChristopherWCar1.jpg<br />
Image:0021-ChristopherWCar2.jpg<br />
Image:0022-ChristopherWithWhat1.jpg<br />
Image:0023-ChristopherWithWhat2.jpg<br />
Image:0024-ChristopherTurns5.jpg<br />
Image:0030-ChristopherWSunglasses.jpg<br />
Image:0031-1-Chris on Pony.jpg<br />
Image:0035-ChritopherArmPaint.jpg<br />
Image:0044-YoungChristopher1.jpg<br />
Image:0047-ChristopherApr1991.jpg<br />
Image:0048-1-Sad Chris.jpg<br />
Image:0048-ChristopherSept1991.jpg<br />
Image:0049-ChristopherFacePaint.jpg<br />
Image:0059-ChristopherWBat.jpg<br />
Image:0072-Chrisian&Santa.jpg<br />
Image:0076-ChristianWTrain.jpg<br />
Image:0086-Christmas95-1.jpg<br />
Image:0087-Christmas95-2.jpg<br />
Image:0088-Christmas95-3.jpg<br />
</gallery>}}<br />
<br />
[[Image:0240-ChristianCBBall97.jpg|120px|thumb|left|CWC the water boy. PRO TIP: Don't drink anything from one of Chris's [[fapcup|cups]].]]<br />
<br />
[[Image:CWC12.png|120px|thumb|Hard to believe, but this photo has not been airbrushed to perfection.]]<br />
<br />
Chris spent much of his time in [[Manchester High School|high school]] playing video games at home, reading R.L. Stine horror novels, and hanging out with his "[[gal pals]]" and "[[Joseph Herring|friend]]" at school. It was at this time that he first put his "creative talents" to use, with the inventions of [[Bionic the Hedgehog]] and Sonichu.<ref>[[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]], [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_7/Page_22]</ref> Chris was on the [[honor roll]] and acquired the true source of his powers, his [[high school ring]].<br />
<br />
Because the art award he wanted was given to someone else, Chris cried like a little bitch during his [[Manchester High School#Graduation|high school graduation]]. He honestly thought he deserved the award more than anyone else because he worked on it ''so hard'' in spite of his autism. Another reason for his sorrow was his fear that he might soon have to grow up and start acting like an adult.<ref>[[:Image:0567-GraduationNote2.jpg|DVD, graduation note 2]]</ref><br />
<br />
Since leaving high school and the happiest years of his life, Chris has been unable to progress in any aspect of his life. He remains trapped in a childish, Year [[2000]] [[Time Void|time-warp]], as he believes that whatever he was doing at the time was what helped him attract female companions. That his high school gal-pals have moved on and married real adult men with careers is of little consequence to him.<br />
<br />
{{collapsible<br />
|Chris's award-winning art work<br />
|<gallery perrow="5"><br />
<br />
Image:444-MecheFox.JPG|This should win a prize.<br />
Image:445-SonicTotem.JPG|Not creepy.<br />
Image:470-CWCCoilPot.JPG|Chris's Like Like.<br />
Image:475-RelaxingCWC1.JPG|Chris relaxing. Not scary at all.<br />
Image:476-RelaxingCWC2.JPG|Uh...<br />
Image:471-ChristophersLeatherFace.JPG|Chris calls this his "leather face". Apparently, he's never seen ''Texas Chainsaw Massacre''.<br />
Image:467-CWCPlate.JPG|This plate helps you lose weight - look at it and you'll want to vomit.<br />
Image:doorfish.jpg|You put this over your door to keep away would be thieves.<br />
</gallery>}}<br />
<br />
===Adult adventures===<br />
[[Image:0781-CWCspdbed.JPG|thumb|One of Chris's promotional images for his [[Love Quest]]. Many women have gouged their eyes out after seeing it.]]<br />
<br />
Chris's entry into [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] probably eased his inability to cope with life after high school. He took courses in [[CADD|Computer Aided Drafting and Design]] and began spending more time on ''Sonichu'', launching a [[Sonichu's News Dash|retarded newsletter]] and circulating it on the PVCC campus. Over time, he began losing touch with his gal-pals from high school, and he presumably found the junior college crowd less willing to humor him and his bullshit.<br />
<br />
Chris says he decided he needed a [[sweetheart]] in February [[2003]]. Possibly driven by his discovery that his old friend [[Sarah Hammer]] had begun dating [[Wes Iseli]], Chris started his [[Love Quest]] in earnest that summer. However, he quickly found that every girl he talked to had a boyfriend...allegedly. Chris soon became neurotic about the "[[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor]]" and began employing various bizarre methods to attract women without actually having to approach them or speak to them.<br />
<br />
Chris's most celebrated technique involved sitting in one place (or pacing back and forth) for hours, holding a [[sign]] that read "I am a (my age then)-Year Old, Single Male, seeking an 18-(my age then)-Year Old, Single Female Companion." Amazingly, this strategy accomplished nothing beyond getting him into trouble with various [[jerkops|authority]] [[manajerks|figures]] who believed that he was loitering and/or soliciting sex. Chris was particularly traumatized by a series of confrontations with the [[PVCC]] dean [[Mary Lee Walsh]] over his attraction techniques, resulting in an ongoing, completely one-sided blood feud. <br />
<br />
After a series of confrontations featuring increasingly bizarre and threatening behavior on Chris's part, Walsh expelled him for one year in [[2004]]. He eventually returned, however, obtaining an associate's degree in May [[2006]]. <br />
<br />
After college, Chris promptly dropped out of society, devoting his life to finding a [[boyfriend-free girl]], drawing ''Sonichu'', [[masturbation|masturbating]], and using his [[monthly tugboat|welfare money]] to buy video games and [[sex toys]].<br />
<br />
[[Image:156-CWCMegan1.jpg|thumb|left|He can smell fear.]]<br />
<br />
In [[2005]], Chris met [[Megan Schroeder]] at a [[Game Place|local game and card shop]]. Megan proved unusual in that she was willing to talk to Chris for more than five minutes. The two quickly became close friends, although Megan claimed to have recently endured a bad break-up and refused to entertain Chris's obvious romantic interest. Chris, being totally smooth with women due to countless hours of studying them in porn and [[anime]], believed that the key to turning Megan's platonic feelings romantic was to make inappropriate advances toward her until she had to tell him to stop touching her.<br />
<br />
In the summer of [[2007]], Chris put it all on the line by entering the [[PaRappa the Rapper Contest|''PaRappa the Rapper'' Contest]] so that he could win prizes and a trip for two to Seattle, which formed the centerpiece of his plan to finally score with Megan. The contest ended in disaster for Chris, as he lost to the dreaded [[Adam Stackhouse]] and finally learned that Megan wouldn't have gone with him on the trip even if he had won.<br />
<br />
It was during the Love Quest that Chris was inspired to launch ''Sonichu'', a comic book series featuring his [[Electric-Hedgehog Pokémon]]. Ostensibly, the comic was intended to raise awareness of Chris's unbelievably original character, but within half an issue, the storylines began to revolve around the frankly more compelling saga of Chris's own personal issues.<br />
{{clear}}<br />
<br />
==Discovery==<br />
{{main|2007|2008}}<br />
[[Image:110-SchuSiteIdea2.jpg|thumb|FUCK YEAH!!!]]<br />
<br />
{{quote|Geez, when you have '''me''' facepalming at you, you have got to be pretty bad off.|[http://encyclopediadramatica.ch/David_Gonterman David Gonterman] on Chris.}}<br />
<br />
Chris's rare talent was discovered when he posted an anonymous picture of Sonichu on [[4-cent garbage|4chan]]. It only took a quick Google search of Chris's name to discover the picture's author, and Chris's miserable existence spilled over onto [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] in October 2007. His life was never the same again.<br />
<br />
Upon learning of the "Chris-chan" article on ED, Chris released a single [[Chris Chan's Public Announcement|YouTube video]] attempting to diplomatically convince the site to remove the page. Failing in this, he then spent the next several months [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica|vandalizing]] the article in the vain hope of overwhelming his enemies. This catastrophically backfired as Chris, in an attempt to prove himself as lurid as the [[trolls]], revealed a great deal of embarrassing information, most notably [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|a portrait of himself fingerbanging Megan]] that ruined his most important relationship at the time. By the spring of [[2008]] Chris would be banned from both [[The Game Place|his favorite hangout]] and [[Grace Baptist Church|his parents' church]] for reasons at least partially related to information brought to light by the ED article.<br />
<br />
In August 2008 Chris [[CWC's Second Message|declared]] [[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)|war]] upon Encyclopedia Dramatica in a series of videos, threatening to withhold publication of the upcoming [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]] unless his vast [[fan base]] rallied to force ED to remove the "Chris-chan" article. When ED suffered outages unrelated to this crusade, Chris [[Kudos to the Encyclopedia DramaDestruction|took credit and declared victory]], guaranteeing that he would be under constant fire from trolls for years to come. This began an endless cycle in which Chris would produce [[videos]], comics, and harebrained schemes to attack the trolls, which would in turn encourage more and more trolls to provoke him for his hilarious responses. <br />
<br />
The cycle was briefly disrupted in the fall of 2008 when Chris sent his various [[medallions]] to his [[Blanca Weiss|fake Internet girlfriend]], who immediately destroyed them and broke up with him. This emotional heartbreak and the release of ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]'' reduced Chris's output of videos and other sources of [[lulz]]. At the same time, Encyclopedia Dramatica began cracking down on trolls using Chris's ED page as a forum for discussing him, and in general opinion was divided as to whether it was lulzy or faggy to continue harassing him. The resulting schism led to the creation of numerous websites (such as [[CWCki|this one]] singularly devoted to trolling Chris), which only expanded coverage of Chris's hijinks.<br />
<br />
==Chris today== <br />
{{main|2008|2009|2010|2011}}<br />
[[File:Ecp00066.jpg|thumb|Chris in [[2009]].]]<br />
By late 2008, trolls controlled many aspects of Chris's life by posing as dedicated [[fans]], cartoonish enemies, and prospective business partners. Chris's ego and [[naive]]te readily embraced this world in which every woman wanted to fuck him, and every man was either trying to help him sell ''Sonichu'' products or steal the franchise for their own nefarious goals. Trolls would begin denoting major events in Chris's life as "[[saga]]s" such as the [[Miyamoto]] Saga, the [[Julie]] Saga, the [[Ivy]] Saga, the [[Liquid Chris|Liquid]] Saga, and the [[Asperchu]] Saga. All the while, the [[CWCki]] maintains a constant record of these events, ensuring that Chris cannot selectively ignore his own history.<br />
<br />
[[File:Personalprofile.jpg|thumb|left|[[OkCupid|Hello]], [[The Hook Cafe|ladies]][[Carlos Chantor|!]]]]<br />
<br />
Following his disastrous failure to woo [[The Wallflower|a real girl]] in March [[2010]], Chris began to realize what anyone else would have figured out a long time ago: his toxic [[Internet]] presence is having a detrimental effect upon his real life, and each new video he creates only makes it worse. This appears to be connected to a reduction in his online presence, and the disappearance of his medallion and his [[Chris and fashion|striped shirts]]. Of late, Chris has become paranoid and has grown more suspicious of anyone online, imploring everyone to meet him in person if they ''really'' want to get to know him. Of course, Chris has [[List of Chris's Lies|a penchant for lying]], so talking to him in real life is as pointless as talking to him online.<br />
<br />
Chris's desire to avoid being fooled has not made him any better at doing it, and the smart money was that sooner or later he'll fall for some "girl" that asks him to [[BlueSpike|shove stuff up his ass]]. No matter how hard Chris tries to avoid the trolling, he will always inexplicably find someone to troll him.<br />
<br />
Today Chris continues to live with his parents, living off the [[monthly tugboat|money]] he receives from the federal government as compensation for his autism, which allegedly renders him incapable of contributing to society. Since he has no job and is usually [[banned]] from any place he visits for more than thirty minutes, Chris has few social outlets and has grown increasingly withdrawn. In his desperate need for attention, he repeatedly returns to the trolls, unwittingly proving that the only people who will put up with him are those who just want him to do something stupid for them to laugh at.<br />
<br />
==Featured fan videos==<br />
<br />
{{collapsible<br />
|Music videos about the life and times of Christian Weston Chandler<br />
|<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = The End of Chris-chan <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|lddgCHYKSG4}}<br />
| Stardate = 2 April 2009<br />
| Maker = [[Vivian Gee]]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = The Rebirth of Chris-chan <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|HSTicQs4Ke8}}<br />
| Stardate = 12 April 2009<br />
| Maker = [[Vivian Gee]]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = Chris-chan is Pitiful <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|gsbzB26sQwk}}<br />
| Stardate = 2 August 2009<br />
| Maker = CreepyMcCreep<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = Resident Chris-chan III: Dating Ground <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|8rRi90wfvHI}}<br />
| Stardate = 1 October 2009<br />
| Maker = MewLine<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info =<br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = IICHH-TIPM - The 503 Faces of Chris-chan<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|YHfZ9XCMUQQ }}<br />
| Stardate = 13 October 2009<br />
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/tehcosmicexplorer08 tehcosmicexplorer08]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = CWC ~ A Sad Story<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|DxAhBoYfWy4}}<br />
| Stardate = 20 November 2009<br />
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/IBAClydeCash IBAClydeCash]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = "My Name Is Christian Weston Chandler" Theatrical Trailer <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|TQfvFw1GMXA}}<br />
| Stardate = 8 December 2009<br />
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/wtfdavemustaine wtfdavemustaine]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = CWC's Show Must Go On!<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|HZqqFUeoaEg }}<br />
| Stardate = 12 December 2009<br />
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/Secretevilguy Secretevilguy]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = The CWCville Show <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|rDyg8bxeyTM}}<br />
| Stardate = 23 December 2009<br />
| Maker = BigBlackPony<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = When Chris-Chan's Gone <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|DE2OOsKrvoU}}<br />
| Stardate = 3 January 2010<br />
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/tehcosmicexplorer08 tehcosmicexplorer08]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
* [[Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)]] - Chris's depiction of himself within his own comics.<br />
* [[Chris-chan Sonichu]] - Chris's furry alter ego.<br />
* [[:Category:DVD slideshow images|Hundreds of personal photographs]] assembled for use in Chris's autobiographical [[DVD]].<br />
* [[User:GodofThunderGodofWar]] - Chris's own CWCki account!<br />
<br />
==References==<br />
{{CWCipedia}}<br />
{{Fan Art|chris=Chris-Chan (fanart)|linkname=Chris}}<br />
<br />
<references /><br />
<br />
{{Chris and|nocat=true}}<br />
{{People}}<br />
{{Timeline|nocat=true}}<br />
<br />
{{DEFAULTSORT:Chandler, Christian Weston}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Chris-chan]]<br />
[[Category:Family Members]]<br />
[[Category:Real people who have appeared in Sonichu comics]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=CWCFlyingElephants&diff=141313CWCFlyingElephants2011-07-04T01:18:00Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>{{Honest}}<br />
[[Image:Cwcspin.gif|right|frame|This video, quite clearly indeed, shows Chris's horrendous man-ass.]]<br />
"'''CWCFlyingElephants'''" is a seven minute video, published by [[The Miscreants]] on 27 [[April 2009]]. Trying to cheer his then-[[sweetheart]] [[Vanessa Hudgens]], it shows [[Chris]] in his room, naked, displaying a show of what he calls [[random-access humor]]. Chris runs, twirls, acts loony, and does headstands while in the [[nude]]. In addition, he [[parody|imitates]] lines from the cartoon show ''[[Wikipedia:Ed, Edd, n' Eddy|Ed, Edd, n Eddy]]'', quotes ''[[Monty Python]]'', plays with toys, and throws around [[Lil' Chris]]. <br />
==Videos==<br />
===Censored Version===<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = CWCFlyingElephants Censored<br />
| image = {{#ev:youtube|eKrl7SA0Myo}}<br />
| imagewidth = 250<br />
| Stardate = 27 April 2009<br />
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]<br />
| Performance Style = [[Image:Crazy.png]] Crazy<br />
| Shirt = [[Image:Creepyrobe.PNG]] Creepy Robe<br />
| Other = [[Image:Leaked.png]] Leaked<br />
| previous = [[Power]]<br />
| next = [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
===Audio Version===<br />
<center><br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = CWCFlyingElephants Audio<br />
| image = {{#ev:youtube|ooT5gK3Cjqk}}<br />
| imagewidth = 250<br />
| Stardate = 27 April 2009<br />
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]<br />
| Performance Style = [[Image:Crazy.png]] Crazy<br />
| Other = [[Image:Leaked.png]] Leaked<br />
| previous = [[Power]]<br />
| next = [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009]]<br />
}}</center><br />
<br />
===Transcript===<br />
And now for somecummpentydifferent. [Chris shows off his [[Muscle bra|man-tits]]] BUUUUNG! And now it's [[Monty Python]]'s flying elephants. Du tu du tu du tu du. Du tu du tu du tu du. Johan, why is people running away? I don't know, [[Gregg Mays|Greeg]], why is people running away. Johan! Johan, why is people running away? I don't know Johan! Greeg! Johan! Johan! Why is people running away? I don't know, buddy Greeg. Johan! Johan, why is people running away? I dont know, Greeg. Johan, Johan, why is people running away? SHUT UP! You're driving me crazy!<br />
<br />
AAAAAAAAGH! HNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNG! Hm! <br />
<br />
It's a [[Silvana|trap]]! HNNNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNG!<br />
<br />
And now for something completely different, a man impersonating Towelie the Towel. Oh my goodness, [[Tomgirl Pictures|my pussy is wet!]] Don't forget to bring a towel! What? When your pussy is wet, and you don't want to lose a bet, you want to dry yourself up right away. That's why Towelie says: don't forget to bring a towel! Wanna get high? NOOOOO! NOOO! <br />
<br />
I would like to meet someone of [[Autism|severe intelligence]]. I would like to hear the sound of two bricks being smashed together. I would like to see ten million stupid monkeys. I would like to see [[Chris and religion|John the Baptist]] impersonation of Graham [[Jimmy Hill|Hill]]. Yes it's historic impersonations! <br />
<br />
Full-frontal nudity. Yes I would do it. If it was valid. If the money was valid. I parted permisses society! I've heard of you in a sense, but I've never had it. Shut up you're driving me crazy. AAAAAAAAAGH!<br />
<br />
I'm a woodpecker! 'Cept with dirt!<ref>Originally said by Ed; originated from [[Wikipedia:Ed, Edd 'n Eddy|Ed, Edd 'n Eddy]] episode [http://www.tv.com/ed-edd-n-eddy/stop-look-ed/episode/123292/summary.html "Stop, Look, Ed"]</ref><br />
<br />
Get out of my head! HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG! HNNNNG! HLOO!<br />
<br />
And now for something completely different. Bebelapdapbambalamba. Bebelabadapbambajamba-[[Transformers|Bumblebeeee]]! Buzzing around. Bzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Really, [[Transformers|Prowl]]. And how necessary is that side-car. Just so you can wear the helmet of your past mastaaaaaar! Come here. [[Transformers|Soundwave]]. Lend me Laserbeak!<br />
<br />
DIIII DIIII DIIII DIIII More than a feeling-<br />
<br />
I like a nice dance in forstue. Otherwise, who said that? Who said that? Who said that? Anywaaay. Who said that? There will now be a short intermission, during which small ice-creams and large boxes will be served in the commissary. Another way to drive people away from the theater is to show a turfs-dispenser. Fzzzs. Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun.<br />
<br />
[[White knight|Pearls before swine]] presents! The like. Do you like this model, or how about this model? I'll give you a [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|karate-kick]] for your money. I'll give you a punch, and a whiz-bang, and a boom! All you got to do is come down here.<br />
<br />
[''[[Donald Duck impersonation|Donald Duck impression]]''] Oh my gosh, look at me! I'm [[Nudes|naked]]! I forgot my [[Sailor Moon|sailor suit]], and my [[Clown Doll|hat]], and [[Duck|apparatus]]. I don't know, but I guess. Here's what I have to do. Here's my clothes. Bwaa. I went out of the cartoon.<br />
<br />
Hmmph, rmmph. Hmmph, rmmph. Hmmph, rmmph. Hmmph, rmmph. Excuse me, what did you say? Hmmph, rmmph.<br />
<br />
Hey [[South Park|Kenny]], you get out here, you take off that stupid little orange or blue jacket, or whatever the hell color it is you wear, and talk to people like you every real life, don't just mumble your words. <br />
<br />
Hey dude, that's not cool.<br />
<br />
Yep. Yep. Yep. Mm-hm. <ref>Regularly used on [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/King_of_the_Hill "King of the Hill."] [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=22-HSjMS3Ks Here's an example.]</ref><br />
<br />
[''Drinks soda''] AAAAAAH!<br />
<br />
Product placement, eh. Product placement in this program is hereby endorsed and provided by the studio, which is provided from the companies of which those products became, originated from, thereof. Another way we can drive people away from the studio is to act. Like. A. Loony!<br />
<br />
[[Random-access humor|I once knew a man from Nantucket, he has on his head, a silly bucket]]. And now I have on my head, a [[Li'l Chris|silly little bear]], I'm wearing [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|clean underwear]]. Wearing clean underwear like I just don't care.<br />
<br />
Wow, he just said what I said. I'm undecided!<br />
<br />
HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG! HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG! HNNNNNNNNNNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNG! HNNNNNNNNNNNNNG! PFOOP!<br />
<br />
[''Holds a [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica|sock puppet]] up''] Hm, I guess he's done left the studio for now. Well, that's all folks.<br />
<br />
Du du du du du du du du. Du du du du du du du du. [[Pedofork|Pedi]] pedi di di. Plong.<br />
<br />
LILILILILILILILI! PLONK!<br />
<br />
Indeed. Indeed. Indeed. Indeed. Indeed. Moola moola moola. He must be asking for a [[Monthly Tugboat|handout]]. Indeed. And now it's the indeed show, starring Mr. [[Thurston Howell III]]. Indeed. Indeed.<br />
<br />
==Sauces==<br />
<references/><br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Random-access humor]]<br />
*[[Monty Python]]<br />
*[[I Got A Fish]]<br />
*[[Bunny Hop]]<br />
*[[Nudes]]<br />
*[[CWC 3D Voice Check]]<br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
* [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uiJont1FhOw A sample of the madness]<br />
* [http://www.slutload.com/watch/7hZAzJutuSx/Chris-chan-completely-different.html Watch CWCFlyingElephants]<br />
* [http://www.megaupload.com/?d=6M64BNL1 Download CWCFlyingElephants]<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Power]]|nextlink=[[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009]]|}}<br />
{{LeakedVideos}}<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, April 2009| 2009-04-27]]<br />
[[Category: Certain videos of the naughty nature| 2009-04-27]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:IBAnderson&diff=139537User:IBAnderson2011-05-11T00:10:45Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>Well, it looks like Chris was serious this time. He really did leave forever. Oh well, on to the second biggest idiot on the internet. Also, I wrote a Christmas carol in memory of the virgin with rage:<br />
<br />
At [[14 Branchland Court]], in Ruckersville V-A<br />
lives a [[pedofork]], who sits around all day.<br />
He doesn't have a [[monthly tugboat|job]], his name is [[Chris Chan|Christian C.]]<br />
And he wants a cute [[gal-pal]], who is [[boyfriend free girl|boyfriend-free]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
[[Sonichu]] is [[homos|gay]].<br />
[[Bob]] cut down the internet,<br />
and then [[Clyde Cash]] got away, hey!<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Chris Chan's very [[obesity|strong]], so don't get in his way,<br />
he sometimes sings his song, "It's OK to be gay" [[It's UGH!|Gah!]]<br />
He breaks all kinds of [[Chris and the law|laws]], he has a [[creepy stare]]<br />
Casting [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|Curse-ye-hame-has]] for [[Christian's name change|God and the Bear]]<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
He doesn't like the [[trolls]], despises [[Asperchu]]<br />
the internet he told, [[Michael Snyder|Mike Snyder]]'s a Jew.<br />
[[Captain's log]] Stardate, December 25th<br />
New year's eve we'll celebrate, with Fanta and [[semen|jizz]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Well, that was it, peace and except for those trolls who despise and harass me, have a good safe holiday. :)<br />
<br />
{{Americunt}}<br />
{{White}}<br />
{{Catholic}}<br />
{{Hex-Box}}<br />
{{Hero}}<br />
{{Virgin with rage}}<br />
{{Desi}}<br />
{{Irish}}<br />
{{AlecBensonLeary}}<br />
{{ClydeCash}}<br />
{{MartialArtist}}</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Take_that_Page_DOWN_NOW!&diff=137697Take that Page DOWN NOW!2011-03-30T02:49:51Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>'''Take that Page DOWN NOW!''' is a [[YouTube]] video posted by [[Chris]] on 30 [[March 2009]], in which he demands that his [[ED]] page be taken down. Later, Chris takes the video down, and updates a longer version, with added footage of him growling at the camera and making threats to [[Clyde Cash]].<br />
==Video==<br />
<br />
{{Tardrage}}<br />
<br />
<center>{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Take that Page DOWN NOW!<br />
| image = {{#ev:youtube|X02mQycxqSw}}<br />
| Stardate = 30 [[March 2009]]<br />
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]<br />
| Subject Matter = {{Violence}} [[Death threats|Violence]]<br />
| Performance Style = [[Image:rage.png]] [[Chris and anger|Rage]]<br />
| Saga = [[Image:Clyde saga.png]] [[Clyde]] saga<br />
| Shirt = [[Image:Brownshirtwithlogo.png]] Brown with Logo<br />
| previous = [[Chris Sings Fart Song for Flora#Watch|Chris Sings Fart Song for Flora]]<br />
| next = [[Take_that_Page_DOWN_NOW!#Director.27s_Cut|Take that Page DOWN NOW! (Director's Cut)]]<br />
}}<br />
</center><br />
<br />
===Transcript===<br />
<br />
Just a major up--just a small update. Well, I just wanted to, uh, ask a small favor. You know what would ''really'' inspire me to continue doing the comics? I tell you what--[''removes glasses, grows more stern'']--you take down that ED page forever. Take it down. It and al--everything about it, including the, the discussion pages. Everything. Delete it.<br />
<br />
[''sighs''] Because you don't--because that thing has been bothering me for so ma--for that long time. And you know how the expression "Too many cooks spoil the broth?" Well, call it--this was "too many ''crooks''." Too many ''crooks''! Too many ''crooks''! And that ED page is one of those crooks. [[Chris and reality|Every page--every word on the discussion page is a crook.]]<br />
<br />
Mmmm! It just makes me really [''tries to flex nonexistent muscles''] ''angry''! Nnngh, nngh! Nnnngh! You know how it makes me angry?<br />
<br />
[''reaches off camera; after jump cut, picks up the [[Clown Doll]] with picture taped to it'']<br />
<br />
This is Clyde. <br />
<br />
[''jump cut to Chris holding doll in left hand and making fist with right'']<br />
<br />
And ''this'' is how angry I am for every waking moment that that ED page is up. [''begins pounding the shit out of doll'']<br />
<br />
[''reaches down to retrieve picture, rips it in half''] NNNGH!<br />
<br />
[''looks into camera, sneering''] You want me to calm down? [[Chris and anger|YOU WANT ME TO CALM DOWN?]] You want me to draw the comics? YOU TAKE DOWN THAT ED PAGE! [''picks up piece of picture, puts it back on doll''] Or Clyde is--BAM! [''resumes punching his clown'']<br />
<br />
==Director's Cut==<br />
<br />
{{Tardrage}}<br />
<br />
<center>{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Take that Page DOWN NOW! (Director's Cut)<br />
| image = {{#ev:youtube|KYATxB7NXAY}}<br />
| Stardate = 30 [[March 2009]]<br />
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]<br />
| Subject Matter = {{Violence|text}}<br />
| Performance Style = [[Image:rage.png]] [[Chris and anger|Rage]]<br />
| Saga = [[Image:Clyde saga.png]] [[Clyde]] saga<br />
| Shirt = [[Image:Brownshirtwithlogo.png]] Brown with Logo<br />
| previous = [[Take_that_Page_DOWN_NOW!#Video|Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]<br />
| next = [[Secret Weapon#Video|Secret Weapon]]<br />
}}<br />
</center><br />
<br />
{{quote|I am going SHOVE your ASS DOWN YOUR THROAT...AND MAKE YOU EAT YOUR UNDERWEAR!}}<br />
<br />
===Transcript===<br />
<br />
[''jump cut, apparently later in the day; Chris is tensing is arms and either hulking up or trying to fart''] Ngh...EEENNNNRRRRGGHHHH!!!<br />
<br />
[''picks up doll again, tries to tear its head off, fails''] EENNGH--GGH! <br />
<br />
[''begins beating it more savagely''] NGH! NGH! [''throws it to ground, reaches down to <s>rape</s> pound on it''] NGH! NGH-NGH-NGH-NGH-NGH-NGH-NGH-NGH!<br />
<br />
[''pops back up to give a primal growl''] ERRRNNNRGGGHH! URRRGH! RRRGH-HAAAGHH! EERGHHAAGHH!<br />
<br />
[''gives [[Claw of Fail]] as he stares off into space, talking like the Ultimate Warrior''] '''CLYDE DO YOU HEAR ME? [[Death threats|YOU ARE ''DEAAAD''!]] YOU ARE ''DEAD''!''' [''hiccups''] '''YOU ARE DEAD! AND SO IS THAT PAGE! RRARRGGH--'''[''hic'']'''--RRRGGHH!!''' [''snorts''] '''EEEEENNRRRHHH!''' [''begins smacking his fist into his palm'']<br />
<br />
[''jump cut; Christian is speaking normally again'']<br />
<br />
Mmm! You despi--you are so despicable, Clyde! I am going to BEAT your lights out! [''performs Claw of Fail again'']I am going to DRAG you right in front of EVERYONE if we ever meet in public! I am going SHOVE your ASS DOWN YOUR THROAT--[''Ultimate Warrior voice'']--'''AND MAKE YOU EAT YOUR UNDERWEAR! NNNGHHGGGHH!'''<br />
<br />
[''throws something into his camera, obscuring it''] <br />
<br />
{{RageQuote|'''''NNNAGGHHHH!!!'''''}}<br />
<br />
==Fan videos==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = Chris Chan's Ultimate Attack <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|cwe-1Ejl5FU}}<br />
| Stardate = 31 March 2009<br />
| Maker = Trowelhands <br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[THAT IS MY HOUSE]]<br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GmTvwy7Emgs Reversed]<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Chris Sings Fart Song for Flora]]|nextlink=[[Secret Weapon]]|}}<br />
{{Troll Videos}}<br />
<br />
{{Clyde Saga}}<br />
<br />
[[Category: Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]<br />
<br />
[[Category: Chris-chan videos, March 2009| 2009-03-30]]<br />
[[Category: Clyde Cash Saga videos| 2009-03-30]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=New_Address&diff=137487New Address2011-03-22T19:49:23Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>'''New Address''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 27 [[September 2010]]. In it, [[Chris]] addresses [[Lars]] to tell him that he has lost [[Jackie]], who has recently become Chris's [[Sweetheart|girlfriend]]. He then proceeds to boast about how he will satisfy Jackie's every desire, in an effort to make Lars jealous. The video concludes with Chris warning Lars that if he tries to mess with Jackie, [[Death threats|he will have to deal with Chris]].<br />
<br />
This is the third video in as many days where Chris has worn the same shirt. The video is also a fine example of Chris's "smug voice", in which Chris attempts to lower his voice, stretching out certain vowels in the process.<br />
<br />
{{clear}}<br />
==Description==<br />
{{quotebox|Dude, I will throw you and knock you out as swiftly and easily as I threw that JetSki. Yeah!!!}}<br />
<br />
==Video==<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = New Address<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|KtIG33GP9n4}}<br />
| stardate = 27 [[September 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Trollsicon|text}}, {{Violence|text}}<br />
| style = {{Smug|text}}<br />
| shirt = {{BrickFestShirt|text}}<br />
| previous = [[Anti Troll Movement Video1]]<br />
| next = [[Lars Is Jivin'.MP4]]<br />
| saga = {{Jackie|text}}<br />
}}<br />
<br />
{{quote|Now she's with a real man. I will satisfy her needs, and her desires.}}<br />
<br />
===Transcript===<br />
<br />
Hello, Lars. I got your email, and I gotta tell you, you're a dang loser for hiding behind a picture of a [[Niggo|black man]]. A dang photograph. Anyway, [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|it's over! It's over!]] [[Megan#Epilogue|You've lost!]] [[The Wallflower|You're history]]! [[Semen|You're kaput!]] You could've-you had your chance with [[Jackie]] but you gonna- YOU LOST, BUDDY, YOU LOST! ''[Holds up toy boat, jabbing it at the camera''] You just kept concentrating on [[ModNation Racers|your daaaayng boats]] all day and all night, ignoring '''HER''' needs, and her desires.<br />
<br />
''[Licks lips]'' Now she's with [[Liquid Chris|a real man]]. [[Chris and sex|I will satisfy her needs, and her desires]]. And if you ever wanna be happy with yourself, you ''[Flashes the finger]'' [[Chris and hypocrisy|GROW UP! You grow up! And you stop thinkin' about yourself]], YEEEEAAAAH! ''[Raises arms]'' You grow up, [[Chris and his ego|stop thinkin about yourself]], YEAAH! ''[Throws the miniature toy boat he's holding. It hits the ceiling and lands on the floor behind him. Chris flinches and [[Chop_Chop_Master_Onion's_Rap_Showdown|ducks]] to avoid his own projectile. [[Slow-in-the-minds|Stares aimlessly for a long moment]].]''<br />
<br />
[[Don't Mess With Me|You mess with me and her]], you're, you're gonna deal with me definitely. Down to [[Chris and health|the last sweat, or breath]].<br />
<br />
{{clear}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
<br />
*[[Lars' Ship has Sunk.MOV|Lars' Ship has Sunk]]<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Anti Troll Movement Video1]]|nextlink=[[Lars Is Jivin'.MP4]]}}<br />
{{Sweetheart Videos}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]<br />
[[Category: Chris-chan videos, September 2010| 2010-09-27]]<br />
[[Category: Jackie Saga videos| 2010-09-27]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=JenkinsJinkiesCwckiApplication.MOV&diff=132884JenkinsJinkiesCwckiApplication.MOV2011-01-31T04:41:58Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>[[JenkinsJinkiesCwckiApplication.MOV]] was a video leaked on 08 August 2010. In the video we see Chris, standing in the bathroom at his local Goodwill with what appears to be his Parappa shirt on his head.<br />
<br />
==History==<br />
<br />
In May 2010, Chris attempted to join the CWCki as JenkinsJinkies. After he wrote the infamous [[Coffee Place]] article, he was fooled into thinking he'd become a legendary troll and invited to join the "inner circle" at [[Trollin Train]]. As part of the application process, he was required to make a video stating why he hated Chris, mention some nefarious trollings he'd done, and pledge allegiance to Clyde Cash.<br />
<br />
It should be noted that Chris apparently thought doing his Uncle Ruckus impression and putting a shirt on his head would be enough to convince trolls that he was a fourteen year old boy. <br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = JenkinsJinkiesCwckiApplication.MOV<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|L8L0g7ESIU4}}<br />
| stardate = 08 August 2010<br />
| subject = {{Trollsicon|text}}<br />
| style = {{Reason|text}}, {{Crazy|text}}<br />
| shirt = {{WhiteTShirt|text}}<br />
| other = {{Leaked|text}}<br />
| previous = [[6 June 2010]]<br />
| next = [[EXCLUSIVE Manchester High School 2000 Reunion Required NOW]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
{{quote|I've performed my own voice-check with my DSi's Voice-Recording Program; I've found the best method to completely change my voice is to go deep, and also pucker my lips while I spoke. It really worked.|[[Jackie_E-mails_5|Chris on the making of this video]]}}<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
<br />
To - For Clyde Cash, and for everybody else on the CWCki...<br />
I hate Christian Weston Chandler because... he is a lazy slob, the money is wasted on him, he doesn't have to work for his money, damn that - damn him! And also, he is not friendly to us males! He should be friendly to us males. It makes me- it really ticks me off. [''Grunt'']<br />
<br />
Anyway, I have been trolling him... I sent a nice emails in the beginning when I started reading in- reading comics, and then, uh, he did not reply, so then I sent him a load of [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|curses]], and then I pretended to be, you know, a whole bunch of other companies like XX such, obviously illegally but that's beside the point.<br />
Anyway, [''Raises right hand''] I pledge my allegiance to Clyde Cash [''Lowers hand''] and everybody else at the CWCki of getting information on Christian Weston Chandler.<br />
<br />
I'm sorry I have been taking so long to do this, but I was just getting settled in, into my new home across the street from his house. Black sheep of the family. They live in that house and they promise not to tell my family back up in Boston. But of course, you know also, I ha- I have uh trolled him, I found him over at the Burger King on the way back to Boston from South Virginia. As I have created the famous Burger King page.<br />
<br />
Thanks very much, Clyde Cash you rule.<br />
<br />
[''Walks off screen'']<br />
<br />
{{LeakedVideos}}</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=I_AM_STRONG&diff=132752I AM STRONG2011-01-28T23:00:12Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:Martinezstrong.jpg|thumb|[[Joshua Martinez]] is also STRONG]]<br />
<br />
"'''11012009 I AM STRONG'''" is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 1 [[November 2009]] in which he acts like he got muscles. (Spoiler: He [[fail]]s again.)<br />
<br />
He also got a [[hair]]cut. [[Barbara Chandler|Chris's mom]] decided to go with the "elderly [[Homos|lesbian]]" look, as opposed to Chris's recent [[For Chris II|middle-aged manchild]] look. Also, notice Chris's profuse [[Stress|sweating]]. For his sake, we can only assume that he's trying his best to speak like a professional wrestler, even though he ends up sounding like [[Wikipedia:Kermit the Frog|Kermit the Frog]] with a sore throat.<br />
<br />
The purpose of this video is vague, though it is likely that this video is an attempt to scare [[Clyde Cash]], whom Chris thinks is scared of flexing and talking in a funny voice.<br />
<br />
== Video ==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = I AM STRONG<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|MmFtocrcDjM}}<br />
| stardate = 1 [[November 2009]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| saga = {{Clyde|text}}<br />
| shirt = {{BlueLogoShirt|text}}<br />
| previous = [[Greetings to Kacey's folks]]<br />
| next = [[Twin Falling Towers]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
{{quote|I AM THE STRONG, BUFF ONE!}}<br />
<br />
=== Transcript ===<br />
[[Image:Strong_Man.jpg|thumb|THIS IS WHAT CHRIS ACTUALLY BELIEVES]]<br />
<br />
[''Chris reaches away from the camera, as "Eye of the Tiger" begins to play. For several seconds, he flexes his jelly-like arms, grunting enthusiastically. He coughs briefly from the effort before launching into his rant.'']<br />
<br />
[''Trying to sound tough; sounds more like [[Wikipedia:Kermit the Frog|Kermit the Frog]]''] You tink you're so tough... *Ahe-Hem!* [[Clyde is Weaker than Water|you think you're so tough]]? No you are not! You are weak!<br />
<br />
[''Chris points at the camera mockingly, in the fashion of [[Wikipedia:Hulk Hogan|Hulk Hogan]], a gesture he repeats throughout the video.'']<br />
<br />
Dis battle is fer... this war is far from beyond over [[Clyde Cash|Mister Clyyyyyde]]! You got nothin'!<br />
<br />
[''Chris holds out his fist, with the [[Amnyfest Ring]], in a menacing gesture.'']<br />
<br />
YOU GOT NOTHIN'! You are weak and very powerless! I am the strong one! I AM STRONNNG! You back down! You... are a weakling! I AM THE STRONG, BUFF ONE! GRRRRR! ARRRRRRR!<br />
<br />
[''Chris returns to posing and grunting until the video concludes.'']<br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jcSV3GMNxBA I AM STRONG MAN], a prophetic fan music video from two days earlier (based on [[10112009]] and [[10122009]])<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Greetings to Kacey's folks]]|nextlink=[[Twin Falling Towers]]|}}<br />
{{Troll Videos}}<br />
{{Power videos}}<br />
{{Clyde Saga}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]<br />
[[Category: Chris-chan videos, November 2009| 2009-11-01]]<br />
[[Category: Clyde Cash Saga videos| 2009-11-01]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Chris_Calls_Clyde_Out&diff=132751Chris Calls Clyde Out2011-01-28T22:49:52Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>On 23 [[April 2009]], after a nearly week-long silence, [[Chris]] finally speaks up again in '''Chris Calls Clyde Out'''. <br />
==Video==<br />
<br />
{{Tardrage}}<br />
<br />
<center><br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Chris Calls Clyde Out<br />
| image = {{#ev:youtube|w8LZmZRmzQM}}<br />
| imagewidth = 250<br />
| Stardate = 23 April 2009<br />
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]<br />
| Performance Style = [[Image:Rage.png]] [[Rage]] [[Image:Crazy.png]] [[Autism|Crazy]]<br />
| Saga = [[Image:Clyde_saga.png]] [[Clyde]] Saga<br />
| Shirt = [[Image:Redgreenvertstripe.png]] Red/Green Vertical Stripe<br />
| previous = [[Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions]]<br />
| next = [[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"]]<br />
}}</center><br />
<br />
{{quote|Come on, trollman. Come out of your trollster's paradise.}}<br />
<br />
{{quote|It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.|William Shakespeare on this video<br />
}}<br />
<br />
===Transcript===<br />
<br />
Hello, [[Clyde Cash|Mr. Clyde]]. I have a bit of a message for you [sic] response to one you sent to me recently. ''[pauses, raises eyebrows]'' Yeah. Basically this is the impression ''I'' got from your message.<br />
<br />
[''Suddenly starts talking in high-pitched voice''] Oh, look at me! I feel like a silly man! Look at me, my eyes? Don't look at my silly walk, look at my sill-nee-nyeh! Look at me! I am the troll. I should be so trolly. I should be trolly. Yes, ah-gah-dyeeeh! Ooh I'm mee! Look at mee! I've got an eyelid strip thing, beblehbebeblehh! I could be more laaame! You want me to be more lyaaame? Everyone laaame! [[South Park|I built this City (shitty) Wall and City Wok]]. Look at my silly walk! [''moves like a penguin''] Eeee!<br />
<br />
[''jump cut'']<br />
<br />
Oh, you forgot my silly walk?! See my [[South Park|City Wall]]? I give you [[Chris and English|akickinthehead]]. Hiyaa! [''Chris raises leg in view of camera''] And punchyouintheface. Hiyaaa! Three, I throwsomethingatyou, pyooo! BIIIM! [''camera falls over''] <br />
<br />
[''jump cut''] <br />
<br />
And you know what else, I throw something else at you. Hiyaa! [''Camera falls over''] Oh, and how 'bout this?! I get [[Autism|'''BLANGRY''']]! [''Chris grunts, growls, and looks a bit constipated, and then he roars at the camera up close and shakes his fists and PS3 controller''] I will call you out, Mr Cush! '''I WILL CAAALL YOU OUT'''! [''he holds his fist up to the camera and punches it'']<br />
<br />
[''video cuts to a calmer Chris in a fighting sort of stance''] <br />
<br />
Come on, trollman. Come out of your [[(Clyde's) Trollsta's Paradise|trollster's paradise]]. I'll give you a beatdown. [''waving fist at camera''] You don't like that? Well... tough cookies! [''Chris holds a thumb up to the camera sideways with a "psh" noise, and then he pauses and punches at it again with another "psh" noise''] <br />
<br />
[''the video cuts again to Chris looking pleased with himself, and he appears to be about to say something, but decides against it'']<br />
<br />
Well Clyde, I'll be calling you out. I know you're in my neck of the woods somewhere, so... just come right on out, and find me. [''flashes a victory sign''] Peace.<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions]]|nextlink=[[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"]]|}}<br />
{{Troll Videos}}<br />
<br />
{{Clyde Saga}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Captain's log entries| 2009-04-23]]<br />
<br />
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, April 2009| 2009-04-23]]<br />
[[Category: Clyde Cash Saga videos| 2009-04-23]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Chris_Calls_Clyde_Out&diff=132750Chris Calls Clyde Out2011-01-28T22:48:51Z<p>IBAnderson: Undo revision 132749 by IBAnderson (talk)</p>
<hr />
<div>On 23 [[April 2009]], after a nearly week-long silence, [[Chris]] finally speaks up again in '''Chris Calls Clyde Out'''. <br />
==Video==<br />
<br />
{{Tardrage}}<br />
<br />
<center><br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Chris Calls Clyde Out<br />
| image = {{#ev:youtube|w8LZmZRmzQM}}<br />
| imagewidth = 250<br />
| Stardate = 23 April 2009<br />
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]<br />
| Performance Style = [[Image:Rage.png]] [[Rage]] [[Image:Crazy.png]] [[Autism|Crazy]]<br />
| Saga = [[Image:Clyde_saga.png]] [[Clyde]] Saga<br />
| Shirt = [[Image:Redgreenvertstripe.png]] Red/Green Vertical Stripe<br />
| previous = [[Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions]]<br />
| next = [[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"]]<br />
}}</center><br />
<br />
{{quote|Come on, trollman. Come out of your trollster's paradise.}}<br />
<br />
{{quote|It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.}}<br />
-William Shakespeare on this video<br />
<br />
<br />
===Transcript===<br />
<br />
Hello, [[Clyde Cash|Mr. Clyde]]. I have a bit of a message for you [sic] response to one you sent to me recently. ''[pauses, raises eyebrows]'' Yeah. Basically this is the impression ''I'' got from your message.<br />
<br />
[''Suddenly starts talking in high-pitched voice''] Oh, look at me! I feel like a silly man! Look at me, my eyes? Don't look at my silly walk, look at my sill-nee-nyeh! Look at me! I am the troll. I should be so trolly. I should be trolly. Yes, ah-gah-dyeeeh! Ooh I'm mee! Look at mee! I've got an eyelid strip thing, beblehbebeblehh! I could be more laaame! You want me to be more lyaaame? Everyone laaame! [[South Park|I built this City (shitty) Wall and City Wok]]. Look at my silly walk! [''moves like a penguin''] Eeee!<br />
<br />
[''jump cut'']<br />
<br />
Oh, you forgot my silly walk?! See my [[South Park|City Wall]]? I give you [[Chris and English|akickinthehead]]. Hiyaa! [''Chris raises leg in view of camera''] And punchyouintheface. Hiyaaa! Three, I throwsomethingatyou, pyooo! BIIIM! [''camera falls over''] <br />
<br />
[''jump cut''] <br />
<br />
And you know what else, I throw something else at you. Hiyaa! [''Camera falls over''] Oh, and how 'bout this?! I get [[Autism|'''BLANGRY''']]! [''Chris grunts, growls, and looks a bit constipated, and then he roars at the camera up close and shakes his fists and PS3 controller''] I will call you out, Mr Cush! '''I WILL CAAALL YOU OUT'''! [''he holds his fist up to the camera and punches it'']<br />
<br />
[''video cuts to a calmer Chris in a fighting sort of stance''] <br />
<br />
Come on, trollman. Come out of your [[(Clyde's) Trollsta's Paradise|trollster's paradise]]. I'll give you a beatdown. [''waving fist at camera''] You don't like that? Well... tough cookies! [''Chris holds a thumb up to the camera sideways with a "psh" noise, and then he pauses and punches at it again with another "psh" noise''] <br />
<br />
[''the video cuts again to Chris looking pleased with himself, and he appears to be about to say something, but decides against it'']<br />
<br />
Well Clyde, I'll be calling you out. I know you're in my neck of the woods somewhere, so... just come right on out, and find me. [''flashes a victory sign''] Peace.<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions]]|nextlink=[[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"]]|}}<br />
{{Troll Videos}}<br />
<br />
{{Clyde Saga}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Captain's log entries| 2009-04-23]]<br />
<br />
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, April 2009| 2009-04-23]]<br />
[[Category: Clyde Cash Saga videos| 2009-04-23]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Chris_Calls_Clyde_Out&diff=132749Chris Calls Clyde Out2011-01-28T22:45:18Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>On 23 [[April 2009]], after a nearly week-long silence, [[Chris]] finally speaks up again in '''Chris Calls Clyde Out'''. <br />
==Video==<br />
<br />
{{Tardrage}}<br />
<br />
<center><br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Chris Calls Clyde Out<br />
| image = {{#ev:youtube|w8LZmZRmzQM}}<br />
| imagewidth = 250<br />
| Stardate = 23 April 2009<br />
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]<br />
| Performance Style = [[Image:Rage.png]] [[Rage]] [[Image:Crazy.png]] [[Autism|Crazy]]<br />
| Saga = [[Image:Clyde_saga.png]] [[Clyde]] Saga<br />
| Shirt = [[Image:Redgreenvertstripe.png]] Red/Green Vertical Stripe<br />
| previous = [[Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions]]<br />
| next = [[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"]]<br />
}}</center><br />
<br />
{{quote|Come on, trollman. Come out of your trollster's paradise.}}<br />
<br />
{{quote|It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.}}<br />
-William Shakespeare on this video<br />
<br />
<br />
===Transcript===<br />
<br />
Hello, [[Clyde Cash|Mr. Clyde]]. I have a bit of a message for you [sic] response to one you sent to me recently. ''[pauses, raises eyebrows]'' Yeah. Basically this is the impression ''I'' got from your message.<br />
<br />
[''Suddenly starts talking in high-pitched voice''] Oh, look at me! I feel like a silly man! Look at me, my eyes? Don't look at my silly walk, look at my sill-nee-nyeh! Look at me! I am the troll. I should be so trolly. I should be trolly. Yes, ah-gah-dyeeeh! Ooh I'm mee! Look at mee! I've got an eyelid strip thing, beblehbebeblehh! I could be more laaame! You want me to be more lyaaame? Everyone laaame! [[South Park|I built this City (shitty) Wall and City Wok]]. Look at my silly walk! [''moves like a penguin''] Eeee!<br />
<br />
[''jump cut'']<br />
<br />
Oh, you forgot my silly walk?! See my [[South Park|City Wall]]? I give you [[Chris and English|akickinthehead]]. Hiyaa! [''Chris raises leg in view of camera''] And punchyouintheface. Hiyaaa! Three, I throwsomethingatyou, pyooo! BIIIM! [''camera falls over''] <br />
<br />
[''jump cut''] <br />
<br />
And you know what else, I throw something else at you. Hiyaa! [''Camera falls over''] Oh, and how 'bout this?! I get [[Autism|'''BLANGRY''']]! [''Chris grunts, growls, and looks a bit constipated, and then he roars at the camera up close and shakes his fists and PS3 controller''] I will call you out, Mr Cush! '''I WILL CAAALL YOU OUT'''! [''he holds his fist up to the camera and punches it'']<br />
<br />
[''video cuts to a calmer Chris in a fighting sort of stance''] <br />
<br />
Come on, trollman. Come out of your [[(Clyde's) Trollsta's Paradise|trollster's paradise]]. I'll give you a beatdown. [''waving fist at camera''] You don't like that? Well... tough cookies! [''Chris holds a thumb up to the camera sideways with a "psh" noise, and then he pauses and punches at it again with another "psh" noise''] <br />
<br />
[''the video cuts again to Chris looking pleased with himself, and he appears to be about to say something, but decides against it'']<br />
<br />
Well Clyde, I'll be calling you out. I know you're in my neck of the woods somewhere, so... just come right on out, and find me. [''flashes a victory sign''] Peace.<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions]]|nextlink=[[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"]]|}}<br />
{{Troll Videos}}<br />
<br />
{{Clyde Saga}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Captain's log entries| 2009-04-23]]<br />
<br />
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, April 2009| 2009-04-23]]<br />
[[Category: Clyde Cash Saga videos| 2009-04-23]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Chris_Calls_Clyde_Out&diff=132748Chris Calls Clyde Out2011-01-28T22:43:42Z<p>IBAnderson: I'll give you one guess who the idiot is.</p>
<hr />
<div>On 23 [[April 2009]], after a nearly week-long silence, [[Chris]] finally speaks up again in '''Chris Calls Clyde Out'''. <br />
==Video==<br />
<br />
{{Tardrage}}<br />
<br />
<center><br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Chris Calls Clyde Out<br />
| image = {{#ev:youtube|w8LZmZRmzQM}}<br />
| imagewidth = 250<br />
| Stardate = 23 April 2009<br />
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]<br />
| Performance Style = [[Image:Rage.png]] [[Rage]] [[Image:Crazy.png]] [[Autism|Crazy]]<br />
| Saga = [[Image:Clyde_saga.png]] [[Clyde]] Saga<br />
| Shirt = [[Image:Redgreenvertstripe.png]] Red/Green Vertical Stripe<br />
| previous = [[Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions]]<br />
| next = [[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"]]<br />
}}</center><br />
<br />
{{quote|Come on, trollman. Come out of your trollster's paradise.}}<br />
<br />
{{quote|It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.}}<br />
-William Shakespeare on this video<br />
<br />
<br />
===Transcript===<br />
<br />
Hello, [[Clyde Cash|Mr. Clyde]]. I have a bit of a message for you [sic] response to one you sent to me recently. ''[pauses, raises eyebrows]'' Yeah. Basically this is the impression ''I'' got from your message.<br />
<br />
[''Suddenly starts talking in high-pitched voice''] Oh, look at me! I feel like a silly man! Look at me, my eyes? Don't look at my silly walk, look at my sill-nee-nyeh! Look at me! I am the troll. I should be so trolly. I should be trolly. Yes, ah-gah-dyeeeh! Ooh I'm mee! Look at mee! I've got an eyelid strip thing, beblehbebeblehh! I could be more laaame! You want me to be more lyaaame? Everyone laaame! [[South Park|I built this City (shitty) Wall and City Wok]]. Look at my silly walk! [''moves like a penguin''] Eeee!<br />
<br />
[''jump cut'']<br />
<br />
Oh, you forgot my silly walk?! See my [[South Park|City Wall]]? I give you [[Chris and English|akickinthehead]]. Hiyaa! [''Chris raises leg in view of camera''] And punchyouintheface. Hiyaaa! Three, I throwsomethingatyou, pyooo! BIIIM! [''camera falls over''] <br />
<br />
[''jump cut''] <br />
<br />
And you know what else, I throw something else at you. Hiyaa! [''Camera falls over''] Oh, and how 'bout this?! I get [[Autism|'''BLANGRY''']]! [''Chris grunts, growls, and looks a bit constipated, and then he roars at the camera up close and shakes his fists and PS3 controller''] I will call you out, Mr Cush! '''I WILL CAAALL YOU OUT'''! [''he holds his fist up to the camera and punches it'']<br />
<br />
[''video cuts to a calmer Chris in a fighting sort of stance''] <br />
<br />
Come on, trollman. Come out of your [[(Clyde's) Trollsta's Paradise|trollster's paradise]]. I'll give you a beatdown. [''waving fist at camera''] You don't like that? Well... tough cookies! [''Chris holds a thumb up to the camera sideways with a "psh" noise, and then he pauses and punches at it again with another "psh" noise''] <br />
<br />
[''the video cuts again to Chris looking pleased with himself, and he appears to be about to say something, but decides against it'']<br />
<br />
Well Clyde, I'll be calling you out. I know you're in my neck of the woods somewhere, so... just come right on out, and find me. [''flashes a victory sign''] Peace.<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Matthew 5:27, CWC Confessions]]|nextlink=[[CWC's "It's All Coming Back To Me"]]|}}<br />
{{Troll Videos}}<br />
<br />
{{Clyde Saga}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Captain's log entries| 2009-04-23]]<br />
<br />
[[Category:Chris-chan videos, April 2009| 2009-04-23]]<br />
[[Category: Clyde Cash Saga videos| 2009-04-23]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:IBAnderson&diff=130222User:IBAnderson2010-12-21T01:56:45Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>Well, it looks like Chris was serious this time. He really did leave forever. Oh well, on to the second biggest idiot on the internet. Also, I wrote a Christmas carol in memory of the virgin with rage:<br />
<br />
At [[14 Branchland Court]], in Ruckersville V-A<br />
lives a [[pedofork]], who sits around all day.<br />
He doesn't have a [[monthly tugboat|job]], his name is [[Chris Chan|Christian C.]]<br />
And he wants a cute [[gal-pal]], who is [[boyfriend free girl|boyfriend-free]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
[[Sonichu]] is [[homos|gay]].<br />
[[Bob]] cut down the internet,<br />
and then [[Clyde Cash]] got away, hey!<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Chris Chan's very [[obesity|strong]], so don't get in his way,<br />
he sometimes sings his song, "It's OK to be gay" [[It's UGH!|Gah!]]<br />
He breaks all kinds of [[Chris and the law|laws]], he has a [[creepy stare]]<br />
Casting [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|Curse-ye-hame-has]] for [[Christian's name change|God and the Bear]]<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
He doesn't like the [[trolls]], despises [[Asperchu]]<br />
the internet he told, [[Michael Snyder|Mike Snyder]]'s a Jew.<br />
[[Captain's log]] Stardate, December 25th<br />
New year's eve we'll celebrate, with Fanta and [[semen|jizz]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Well, that was it, peace and except for those trolls who despise and harass me, have a good safe holiday. :)<br />
<br />
{{Americunt}}<br />
{{White}}<br />
{{Christian}}<br />
{{Hex-Box}}<br />
{{Hero}}<br />
{{Virgin with rage}}<br />
{{Desi}}<br />
{{Irish}}<br />
{{AlecBensonLeary}}<br />
{{ClydeCash}}<br />
{{MartialArtist}}</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:IBAnderson&diff=130194User:IBAnderson2010-12-20T21:10:47Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>Well, it looks like Chris was serious this time. He really did leave forever. Oh well, on to the second biggest idiot on the internet. Also, I wrote a Christmas carol in memory of the virgin with rage:<br />
<br />
At [[14 Branchland Court]], in Ruckersvill V-A<br />
lives a [[pedofork]], who sits around all day.<br />
He doesn't have a [[monthly tugboat|job]], his name is [[Chris Chan|Christian C.]]<br />
And he wants a cute [[gal-pal]], who is [[boyfriend free girl|boyfriend-free]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
[[Sonichu]] is [[homos|gay]].<br />
[[Bob]] cut down the internet,<br />
and then [[Clyde Cash]] got away, hey!<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Chris Chan's very [[obesity|strong]], so don't get in his way,<br />
he sometimes sings his song, "It's OK to be gay" [[It's UGH!|Gah!]]<br />
He breaks all kinds of [[Chris and the law|laws]], he has a [[creepy stare]]<br />
Casting [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|Curse-ye-hame-has]] for [[Christian's name change|God and the Bear]]<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
He doesn't like the [[trolls]], despises [[Asperchu]]<br />
the internet he told, [[Michael Snyder|Mike Snyder]]'s a Jew.<br />
[[Captain's log]] Stardate, December 25th<br />
New year's eve we'll celebrate, with Fanta and [[semen|jizz]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Well, that was it, peace and except for those trolls who despise and harass me, have a good safe holiday. :)<br />
<br />
{{Americunt}}<br />
{{White}}<br />
{{Christian}}<br />
{{Hex-Box}}<br />
{{Hero}}<br />
{{Virgin with rage}}<br />
{{Desi}}<br />
{{Irish}}<br />
{{AlecBensonLeary}}<br />
{{ClydeCash}}<br />
{{MartialArtist}}</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:IBAnderson&diff=130193User:IBAnderson2010-12-20T21:09:26Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>Well, it looks like Chris was serious this time. He really did leave forever. Oh well, on to the second biggest idiot on the internet. Also, I wrote a Christmas carol in memory of the virgin with rage:<br />
<br />
At [[14 Branchland Court]], in Ruckersvill V-A<br />
lives a [[pedofork]], who sits around all day<br />
He doesn't have a [[monthly tugboat|job]], his name is [[Chris Chan|Christian C.]]<br />
And he wants a cute [[gal-pal]], who is [[boyfriend free girl|boyfriend-free]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
[[Sonichu]] is [[homos|gay]].<br />
[[Bob]] cut down the internet,<br />
and then [[Clyde Cash]] got away, hey!<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Chris Chan's very [[obesity|strong]], so don't get in his way,<br />
he sometimes sings his song, "It's OK to be gay" [[It's UGH!|Gah!]]<br />
He breaks all kinds of [[Chris and the law|laws]], he has a [[creepy stare]]<br />
Casting [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|Curse-ye-hame-has]] for [[Christian's name change|God and the Bear]]<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
He doesn't like the [[trolls]], despises [[Asperchu]]<br />
the internet he told, [[Michael Snyder|Mike Snyder]]'s a Jew<br />
[[Captain's log]] Stardate, December 25th<br />
New year's eve we'll celebrate, with Fanta and [[semen|jizz]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Well, that was it, peace and except for those trolls who despise and harass me, have a good safe holiday. :)<br />
<br />
{{Americunt}}<br />
{{White}}<br />
{{Christian}}<br />
{{Hex-Box}}<br />
{{Hero}}<br />
{{Virgin with rage}}<br />
{{Desi}}<br />
{{Irish}}<br />
{{AlecBensonLeary}}<br />
{{ClydeCash}}<br />
{{MartialArtist}}</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:IBAnderson&diff=130192User:IBAnderson2010-12-20T21:08:44Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>Well, it looks like Chris was serious this time. He really did leave forever. Oh well, on to the second biggest idiot on the internet. Also, I wrote a Christmas carol in memory of the virgin with rage:<br />
<br />
At [[14 Branchland Court]], in Ruckersvill V-A<br />
lives a [[pedofork]], who sits around all day<br />
He doesn't have a [[monthly tugboat|job]], his name is [[Chris Chan|Christian C.]]<br />
And he wants a cute [[gal-pal]], who is [[boyfriend-free|boyfriend free girl]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
[[Sonichu]] is [[homos|gay]].<br />
[[Bob]] cut down the internet,<br />
and then [[Clyde Cash]] got away, hey!<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Chris Chan's very [[obesity|strong]], so don't get in his way,<br />
he sometimes sings his song, "It's OK to be gay" [[It's UGH!|Gah!]]<br />
He breaks all kinds of [[Chris and the law|laws]], he has a [[creepy stare]]<br />
Casting [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|Curse-ye-hame-has]] for [[Christian's name change|God and the Bear]]<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
He doesn't like the [[trolls]], despises [[Asperchu]]<br />
the internet he told, [[Michael Snyder|Mike Snyder]]'s a Jew<br />
[[Captain's log]] Stardate, December 25th<br />
New year's eve we'll celebrate, with Fanta and [[semen|jizz]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Well, that was it, peace and except for those trolls who despise and harass me, have a good safe holiday. :)<br />
<br />
{{Americunt}}<br />
{{White}}<br />
{{Christian}}<br />
{{Hex-Box}}<br />
{{Hero}}<br />
{{Virgin with rage}}<br />
{{Desi}}<br />
{{Irish}}<br />
{{AlecBensonLeary}}<br />
{{ClydeCash}}<br />
{{MartialArtist}}</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:IBAnderson&diff=130191User:IBAnderson2010-12-20T21:08:11Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>Well, it looks like Chris was serious this time. He really did leave forever. Oh well, on to the second biggest idiot on the internet. Also, I wrote a Christmas carol in memory of the virgin with rage:<br />
<br />
At [[14 Branchland Court]], in Ruckersvill V-A<br />
lives a [[pedofork]], who sits around all day<br />
He doesn't have a [[job|monthly tugboat]], his name is [[Chris Chan|Christian C.]]<br />
And he wants a cute [[gal-pal]], who is [[boyfriend-free|boyfriend free girl]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
[[Sonichu]] is [[homos|gay]].<br />
[[Bob]] cut down the internet,<br />
and then [[Clyde Cash]] got away, hey!<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Chris Chan's very [[obesity|strong]], so don't get in his way,<br />
he sometimes sings his song, "It's OK to be gay" [[It's UGH!|Gah!]]<br />
He breaks all kinds of [[Chris and the law|laws]], he has a [[creepy stare]]<br />
Casting [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|Curse-ye-hame-has]] for [[Christian's name change|God and the Bear]]<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
He doesn't like the [[trolls]], despises [[Asperchu]]<br />
the internet he told, [[Michael Snyder|Mike Snyder]]'s a Jew<br />
[[Captain's log]] Stardate, December 25th<br />
New year's eve we'll celebrate, with Fanta and [[semen|jizz]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Well, that was it, peace and except for those trolls who despise and harass me, have a good safe holiday. :)<br />
<br />
{{Americunt}}<br />
{{White}}<br />
{{Christian}}<br />
{{Hex-Box}}<br />
{{Hero}}<br />
{{Virgin with rage}}<br />
{{Desi}}<br />
{{Irish}}<br />
{{AlecBensonLeary}}<br />
{{ClydeCash}}<br />
{{MartialArtist}}</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:IBAnderson&diff=130190User:IBAnderson2010-12-20T21:07:32Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>Well, it looks like Chris was serious this time. He really did leave forever. Oh well, on to the second biggest idiot on the internet. Also, I wrote a Christmas carol in memory of the virgin with rage:<br />
<br />
At 14 Branchland Court, in Ruckersvill V-A<br />
lives a [[pedofork]], who sits around all day<br />
He doesn't have a [[job|monthly tugboat]], his name is [[Chris Chan|Christian C.]]<br />
And he wants a cute [[gal-pal]], who is [[boyfriend-free|boyfriend free girl]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
[[Sonichu]] is [[homos|gay]].<br />
[[Bob]] cut down the internet,<br />
and then [[Clyde Cash]] got away, hey!<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Chris Chan's very [[obesity|strong]], so don't get in his way,<br />
he sometimes sings his song, "It's OK to be gay" [[It's UGH!|Gah!]]<br />
He breaks all kinds of [[Chris and the law|laws]], he has a [[creepy stare]]<br />
Casting [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|Curse-ye-hame-has]] for [[Christian's name change|God and the Bear]]<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
He doesn't like the [[trolls]], despises [[Asperchu]]<br />
the internet he told, [[Michael Snyder|Mike Snyder]]'s a Jew<br />
[[Captain's log]] Stardate, December 25th<br />
New year's eve we'll celebrate, with Fanta and [[semen|jizz]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Well, that was it, peace and except for those trolls who despise and harass me, have a good safe holiday. :)<br />
<br />
{{Americunt}}<br />
{{White}}<br />
{{Christian}}<br />
{{Hex-Box}}<br />
{{Hero}}<br />
{{Virgin with rage}}<br />
{{Desi}}<br />
{{Irish}}<br />
{{AlecBensonLeary}}<br />
{{ClydeCash}}<br />
{{MartialArtist}}</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:IBAnderson&diff=130189User:IBAnderson2010-12-20T21:06:39Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>Well, it looks like Chris was serious this time. He really did leave forever. Oh well, on to the second biggest idiot on the internet. Also, I wrote a Christmas carol in memory of the virgin with rage:<br />
<br />
At 14 Branchland Court, in Ruckersvill V-A<br />
lives a [[pedofork]], who sits around all day<br />
He doesn't have a [[job|monthly tugboat]], his name is [[Chris Chan|Christian C.]]<br />
And he wants a cute [[gal-pal]], who is [[boyfriend-free|boyfriend free girl]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
[[Sonichu]] is [[homos|gay]].<br />
[[Bob]] cut down the internet,<br />
and then [[Clyde Cash]] got away, hey!<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Chris Chan's very [obesity|strong], so don't get in his way<br />
he sometimes sings his song, "It's OK to be gay" [[It's UGH!|Gah!]]<br />
He breaks all kinds of [[Chris and the law|laws]], he has a [[creepy stare]]<br />
Casting [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|Curse-ye-hame-has]] for [[Christian's name change|God and the Bear]]<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
He doesn't like the [[trolls]], despises [[Asperchu]]<br />
the internet he told, [[Michael Snyder|Mike Snyder]]'s a Jew<br />
[[Captain's log]] Stardate, December 25th<br />
New year's eve we'll celebrate, with Fanta and [[semen|jizz]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Well, that was it, peace and except for those trolls who despise and harass me, have a good safe holiday. :)<br />
<br />
{{Americunt}}<br />
{{White}}<br />
{{Christian}}<br />
{{Hex-Box}}<br />
{{Hero}}<br />
{{Virgin with rage}}<br />
{{Desi}}<br />
{{Irish}}<br />
{{AlecBensonLeary}}<br />
{{ClydeCash}}<br />
{{MartialArtist}}</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:IBAnderson&diff=130188User:IBAnderson2010-12-20T21:06:18Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>Well, it looks like Chris was serious this time. He really did leave forever. Oh well, on to the second biggest idiot on the internet. Also, I wrote a Christmas carol in memory of the virgin with rage: <br />
At 14 Branchland Court, in Ruckersvill V-A<br />
lives a [[pedofork]], who sits around all day<br />
He doesn't have a [[job|monthly tugboat]], his name is [[Chris Chan|Christian C.]]<br />
And he wants a cute [[gal-pal]], who is [[boyfriend-free|boyfriend free girl]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
[[Sonichu]] is [[homos|gay]].<br />
[[Bob]] cut down the internet,<br />
and then [[Clyde Cash]] got away, hey!<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Chris Chan's very [obesity|strong], so don't get in his way<br />
he sometimes sings his song, "It's OK to be gay" [[It's UGH!|Gah!]]<br />
He breaks all kinds of [[Chris and the law|laws]], he has a [[creepy stare]]<br />
Casting [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|Curse-ye-hame-has]] for [[Christian's name change|God and the Bear]]<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
He doesn't like the [[trolls]], despises [[Asperchu]]<br />
the internet he told, [[Michael Snyder|Mike Snyder]]'s a Jew<br />
[[Captain's log]] Stardate, December 25th<br />
New year's eve we'll celebrate, with Fanta and [[semen|jizz]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Well, that was it, peace and except for those trolls who despise and harass me, have a good safe holiday. :)<br />
<br />
{{Americunt}}<br />
{{White}}<br />
{{Christian}}<br />
{{Hex-Box}}<br />
{{Hero}}<br />
{{Virgin with rage}}<br />
{{Desi}}<br />
{{Irish}}<br />
{{AlecBensonLeary}}<br />
{{ClydeCash}}<br />
{{MartialArtist}}</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:IBAnderson&diff=130187User:IBAnderson2010-12-20T21:04:37Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>Well, it looks like Chris was serious this time. He really did leave forever. Oh well, on to the second biggest idiot on the internet. Also, I wrote a Christmas carol in memory of the virgin with rage: <br />
At 14 Branchland Court, in Ruckersvill V-A<br />
lives a [[pedofork]], who sits around all day<br />
He doesn't have a [[job|monthly tugboat]], his name is [[Chris Chan|Christian C.]]<br />
And he wants a cute [[gal-pal]], who is [[boyfriend-free|boyfriend free girl]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
[[Sonichu]] is [[homos|gay]].<br />
[[Bob]] cut down the internet,<br />
and then [[Clyde Cash]] got away, hey!<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Chris Chan's very [obesity|strong], so don't get in his way<br />
he sometimes sings his song, "It's OK to be gay" [[It's Ugh!|Gah!]]<br />
He breaks all kinds of [[Chris and the law|laws]], he has a [[creepy stare]]<br />
Casting [[Curse-ye-hame-ha|Curse-ye-hame-has]] for [[Christian's name change|God and the Bear]]<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
He doesn't like the [[trolls]], despises [[Asperchu]]<br />
the internet he told, [[Michael Snyder|Mike Snyder]]'s a Jew<br />
[[Captain's log]] Stardate, December 25th<br />
New year's eve we'll celebrate, with Fanta and [[semen|jizz]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Well, that was it, peace and except for those trolls who despise and harass me, have a good safe holiday. :)<br />
<br />
{{Americunt}}<br />
{{White}}<br />
{{Christian}}<br />
{{Hex-Box}}<br />
{{Hero}}<br />
{{Virgin with rage}}<br />
{{Desi}}<br />
{{Irish}}<br />
{{AlecBensonLeary}}<br />
{{ClydeCash}}<br />
{{MartialArtist}}</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:IBAnderson&diff=130186User:IBAnderson2010-12-20T20:59:41Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>Well, it looks like Chris was serious this time. He really did leave forever. Oh well, on to the second biggest idiot on the internet. Also, I wrote a Christmas carol in memory of the virgin with rage: <br />
At 14 Branchland Court, in Ruckersvill V-A<br />
lives a [[pedofork]], who sits around all day<br />
He doesn't have a [[job|monthly tugboat]], his name is [[Christian C.|Chris Chan]]<br />
And he wants a cute [[gal-pal]], who is [[boyfriend-free|boyfriend free girl]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
[[Sonichu]] is [[homos|gay]].<br />
[[Bob]] cut down the internet,<br />
and then [[Clyde Cash]] got away, hey!<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Chris Chan's very [obesity|strong], so don't get in his way<br />
he sometimes sings his song, "It's OK to be gay" Gah!<br />
He breaks all kinds of [[Chris and the law|laws]], he has a [[creepy stare]]<br />
Casting [[Curse-ye-hame-ha|Curse-ye-hame-has]] for [[Christian's name change|God and the Bear]]<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
He doesn't like the [[trolls]], despises [[Asperchu]]<br />
the internet he told, [[Michael Snyder|Mike Snyder]]'s a Jew<br />
[[Captain's log]] Stardate, December 25th<br />
New year's eve we'll celebrate, with Fanta and [[semen|jizz]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Well, that was it, peace and except for those trolls who despise and harass me, have a good safe holiday. :)<br />
<br />
{{Americunt}}<br />
{{White}}<br />
{{Christian}}<br />
{{Hex-Box}}<br />
{{Hero}}<br />
{{Virgin with rage}}<br />
{{Desi}}<br />
{{Irish}}<br />
{{AlecBensonLeary}}<br />
{{ClydeCash}}<br />
{{MartialArtist}}</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:IBAnderson&diff=130185User:IBAnderson2010-12-20T20:52:45Z<p>IBAnderson: Merry CWCmas!</p>
<hr />
<div>Well, it looks like Chris was serious this time. He really did leave forever. Oh well, on to the second biggest idiot on the internet. Also, I wrote a Christmas carol in memory of the virgin with rage: <br />
At 14 Branchland Court, in Ruckersvill V-A<br />
lives a [[pedofork]], who sits around all day<br />
He doesn't have a [[job|monthly tugboat]], his name is [[Christian C.|Chris Chan]]<br />
And he wants a cute [[gal-pal]], who is [[boyfriend-free|boyfriend free girl]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
[[Sonichu]] is [[homos|gay]].<br />
[[Bob]] cut down the internet,<br />
and then [[Clyde Cash]] got away, hey!<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Chris Chan's very [strong|obesity], so don't get in his way<br />
he sometimes sings his song, "It's OK to be gay" Gah!<br />
He breaks all kinds of [[laws|Chris and the law]], he has a [[creepy stare]]<br />
Casting [[Curse-ye-hame-has|Curse-ye-hame-ha]] for [[God and the Bear|Christian's name change]]<br />
<br />
Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
He doesn't like the [[trolls]], despises [[Asperchu]]<br />
the internet he told, [[Mike Snyder]]'s a Jew<br />
[[Captain's log]] Stardate, December 25th<br />
New year's eve we'll celebrate, with Fanta and [[jizz|semen]]<br />
<br />
Oh, Jingle bells, Chris Chan smells,<br />
Sonichu is gay.<br />
Bob cut down the internet,<br />
and then Clyde Cash got away.<br />
<br />
Well, that was it, peace and except for those trolls who despise and harass me, have a good safe holiday. :)<br />
<br />
{{Americunt}}<br />
{{White}}<br />
{{Christian}}<br />
{{Hex-Box}}<br />
{{Hero}}<br />
{{Virgin with rage}}<br />
{{Desi}}<br />
{{Irish}}<br />
{{AlecBensonLeary}}<br />
{{ClydeCash}}<br />
{{MartialArtist}}</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=For_My_Sweetest_Ivy&diff=127854For My Sweetest Ivy2010-12-01T23:52:40Z<p>IBAnderson: /* Transcript */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{quote| You know, '''''MY MOMMY AND I...'''''| Anybody (especially a male) over the age of 5 who calls their mother "mommy" is a very scary individual.}}<br />
<br />
{{quote| I look forward to the eventuality of, uh, you and me having our sex time together.|Chris.}}<br />
<br />
{{quote| Thank you for giving me another colorful character to see in my nightmares.|'Lauren', WBCN listener and resident of Bostonia.}}<br />
<br />
On 1 [[May 2009]], Chris sends a message to [[Ivy]] promising smoothies, ''Gilligan's Island'', ''[[Family Guy]]'', masses of porn-based [[sex]], ''[[Guitar Hero]]'', a romantic walk through the [[Charlottesville Fashion Square Fashion Square|mall]] and many places with "green and sunlight" for the [[Crass and Champ|hermit crabs]]. On 12 May, this video was discussed on [[Toucher and Rich Segment|the morning show of Boston radio station WBCN]]. <br />
<br />
==Video==<br />
<br />
<center><br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = For My Sweetest Ivy<br />
| image = {{#ev:youtube|nBUzZowEt1E}}<br />
| imagewidth = 250<br />
| Stardate = 1 May 2009<br />
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]<br />
| Subject Matter = {{Sex}} [[Sex]]<br />
| Saga = {{Ivy}} [[Ivy]] Saga<br />
| Shirt = {{RedShirt2}} Red Stuttgart<br />
| previous = [[ShutUpBrain and WakeUpBrain]]<br />
| next = [[CWC Address to Unilever About AXE]]<br />
}}</center><br />
<br />
===Transcript===<br />
<br />
Hey [[Ivy]]! I'm doing this video for yoooou. Oh, we are gonna have so much ''fun together'' when you and I are together! Hmmm! You know, '''my [[Barbara Chandler|mommy]] and''' I--my, my family and I will come and meet you at the airport. And you know, your choice so--take you to your hotel or, uh, bring you back to...my house, hmmm. I mean, uh, you know, we'd be hanging around so much and sharing so many [[Chris and English|fondful]] memories. <br />
<br />
Hmm. And you know, I few--I know a few good places in [[Charlottesville]], you know, I think it's, you know, I'll take you there, we'll get some [[McDonalds|good things to eeeeeat]], and we’ll hang ooouut. We’ll have so much fun. We’ll, uh, [[Rape|have a good time together]], you know. I know a place that serves some great smoothies. Uh, yeah, the cafe, in Charlottesville. Good place. Serves good smoothies! And you know, we can enjoy a movie in the theater, or in--at home, or watch a television rerun. ''[[Family Guy]]''! Heh. ''Family Guy''! Or, uh, [[I Love Lucy]] or I got some—I got the entire series of ''Gilligan's Island'', hmmm. Hoo-hoo! Hmm, and we can make some music together on ''[[Guitar Hero]]''. Hmmm. Well, you can sing, I got a microphone. I'm thinking about getting drums. [''Makes a drum sound'']<br />
<br />
Hmmm, yeah. And you know, I will see you in the--I look forward to the eventuality of, uh, you and me having our sex time together. Hmmm, I'll do you so many--I'll—-I’ll do my best to pleasure you and keep you satisfied, my sweetest Ivy, just for you. ''Just for you!'' Hmmm! I know a number of good positions and massages, hmm. Hmmm. And, you know, I know a number, uh, places we could walk around at, you know. We could walk about the mall! We could walk about the [[University of Virginia|UVA]] grounds! Good places where there's plenty of green and sunlight. <br />
<br />
Hmm, and wa--we can walk the [[Crass and Champ|hermit crabs]] together, hmm, talkin’ about—somethin’ like, how you might like to--how you might [[Chris and Reality|walk your hermit crabs]], hmmmm. Hmmmm, so, you know, wonderful memories! Wonderful memories! We're gonna have lots of fun. We’re gon--I'll do my best--I'll do my best to keep you entertained, show you a good time, when we're having a good time. And I promise, I’ll remain your good boy forever and for always. And to get, uh, my friends up I've been talking to uh, between on the Internet, and in real life--my real friends, they can vouch for me on, uh, how good a boy I have been. Being a good boy just for you, Ivy. I love you so much, I love you so muuuuch! [''Pretends to hug her''] Hmmmm. Hmmm, look at me smile, hmm. It's a nice smile. Because I love you, Ivy! I love you so much. I ran out of details. [''Laughs''] I don't know. I guess I'll sing you a song. <br />
<br />
[''Sings a variation of [[Wikipedia:Jolly Holiday|"Jolly Holiday"]] from ''[[Mary Poppins]]'', attempting to imitate Dick Van Dyke's cockney accent''] <br />
<br />
It's a jolly ‘oliday<br><br />
With Ivy<br><br />
Ivy makes my heart so light<br><br />
When the skies are grey<br><br />
And ordinary<br><br />
Ivy makes the sun shine bright.<br><br />
Oh, happiness is blooming<br><br />
All around ‘er<br> <br />
The daffodils are smiling<br> <br />
At the doves<br><br />
When Ivy holds my hand<br><br />
I feel so grand<br><br />
My 'eart starts beating<br><br />
Like a big brass band!<br><br />
<br />
[''Mimes waving his hat over his head as he sinks to the floor, with his Playstation controller as the hat'']<br />
<br />
It's a jolly holiday with Ivy<br><br />
No wonder that it's Ivy that I love. <br><br />
<br />
You know something else, [[Chris and His Ego|I should have]] uh, thought of--of doing this before, you know, to feel more positive, highlight for anybody who, uh, goes back on information. I should recreate, uh, something for [[MySpace]] or [[Facebook]] with all the positive highlights and all the true details that would not, uh, be, uh, somehow twisted in any erroneous way. I'll work on that. I will work on that. Because it's the honest truth from my head. From my head. I love you so much Ivy. I love you! I love youuu. [''Blows a kiss to the camera''] Talk to you later, [[sweetheart]]. <br />
<br />
[''Jump cut'']<br />
<br />
And also to your [[Keino|father]] the [[jerkops|policeman]], I salute him with my [[Wikipedia:Scout_sign_and_salute#Cub_Scouts.27_two-finger_salute|Cub Scout salute]] that I have favored for so long.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[ShutUpBrain and WakeUpBrain]]|nextlink=[[CWC Address to Unilever About AXE]]|}}<br />
{{Sweetheart Videos}}<br />
{{Music Videos}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]<br />
[[Category:Media that has been published in real life]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=CWC_Update_12_August_2009&diff=127718CWC Update 12 August 20092010-12-01T01:01:37Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:Familylife.jpg|thumb|"WHAT. THE. FUCK?"]]<br />
<br />
"'''CWC Update 12 August 2009'''" (officially "'''CWC Update 08122009'''") is a video in which [[Chris]] expresses his disgust about the recent wave of [[:Category:Guro|fanart]] sent to him. In his defense, Chris compares himself to the likes of [[The Simpsons|Homer Simpson]] and [[Family Guy|Peter Griffin]]. <br />
<br />
Because Chris is a [[slow in the mind|moron]], he incorrectly listed the month as April. The video was, in fact, uploaded in August. This error has been recurring, with a [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2009|previous video]] from the same month having the same date mistake.<br />
<br />
Given the fact that Chris has no life and spends most of his life secluded in his [[Chris's room|bedroom]], it's reasonable to suspect he would lose track of what ''month'' it is.<br />
{{clear}}<br />
<br />
==Video==<br />
<br />
{{Tardrage}}<br />
<br />
<center><br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = CWC Update 12 August 2009<br />
| image = {{#ev:youtube|NtPlZedDTmo}}<br />
| imagewidth = 250<br />
| Stardate = 12 August 2009<br />
| Maker = [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]]<br />
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Fanartn.PNG]] Fanart<br />
| Shirt = {{GreenWhiteStripe|text}}<br />
| previous = [[LOOK_at_the_truth!| LOOK at the truth!]]<br />
| next = [[CWC_Update_13_August_2009| CWC Update 13 August 2009]]<br />
}} </center><br />
<br />
{{quote|That's illegal everywhere and it is ''so'' wrong.}}<br />
<br />
===Transcript===<br />
<br />
[[Captain's Log]], Stardate April [sic] 12th, [[2009]]. <br />
<br />
Let's, uh, sort out one little topic of interest. If you're going to send me fanart [''takes off glasses''], please keep it clean. No [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|gross X-triple-X-rated sexual content]]. Eh, and also definitely worst of: do not send me anything of [[Pedofork|child sex]]. [''in a high pitch''] What the hell is wrong with you people? That's illegal everywhere and it is ''so'' wrong. I mean, I am like a family man; even though I'm not married, [[List of Chris's Lies| I have the mind like a family man]]. I mean, look at Homer Simpson. He's a family man. Do you think he does that with his children? Christ, are you stupid? Or look at Peter Griffin from ''[[Family Guy]]''. Do you think he's having, even Meg? [''grunts annoyedly''] Or even back in the day, [[I Love Lucy|Lucy Ball, Desi Arnez Jr.]], or even, huh, Dick Van Dyke, uh, Mary Tyler Moore, and Rich Junior? Anyways, point is: it's wrong. It grosses me out; it grosses everybody out, so just STOP IT! [''again in a high pitch''] [[Chris and hypocrisy|What the hell is wrong with you people?]] It makes me think that there is something wrong with this dang world, with such [[Chris|stupid, idiotic bastards]] like you drawing such things, creating them in their heads and then—WHAT. THE. '''FUCK'''! No more; keep it clean; keep it decent! I said, "like [[Masturbating and squirtin'|kisses]]." You know, like kissing scenes... and not X-rated, or even worse that I just talked about. What the hell is wrong with you people? Don't draw such [[shecameforcwc.jpg|grotesque pieces of work]] that's I cannot even feel comfortable by calling them... art. Cause they are ''not''! They are trash; [[4-cent_garbage.com|4-cent garbage]]! No more of that shit. <br />
<br />
Have a good day. Peace.<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[LOOK at the truth!]]|nextlink=[[CWC Update 13 August 2009]]|}}<br />
{{Captain's Log}}<br />
<br />
[[Category: Captain's log entries| 2009-08-12]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=CWC_Update_12_August_2009&diff=127717CWC Update 12 August 20092010-12-01T01:00:16Z<p>IBAnderson: links to Chris's lies and Chris pages</p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:Familylife.jpg|thumb|"WHAT. THE. FUCK?"]]<br />
<br />
"'''CWC Update 12 August 2009'''" (officially "'''CWC Update 08122009'''") is a video in which [[Chris]] expresses his disgust about the recent wave of [[:Category:Guro|fanart]] sent to him. In his defense, Chris compares himself to the likes of [[The Simpsons|Homer Simpson]] and [[Family Guy|Peter Griffin]]. <br />
<br />
Because Chris is a [[slow in the mind|moron]], he incorrectly listed the month as April. The video was, in fact, uploaded in August. This error has been recurring, with a [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 3rd, 2009|previous video]] from the same month having the same date mistake.<br />
<br />
Given the fact that Chris has no life and spends most of his life secluded in his [[Chris's room|bedroom]], it's reasonable to suspect he would lose track of what ''month'' it is.<br />
{{clear}}<br />
<br />
==Video==<br />
<br />
{{Tardrage}}<br />
<br />
<center><br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = CWC Update 12 August 2009<br />
| image = {{#ev:youtube|NtPlZedDTmo}}<br />
| imagewidth = 250<br />
| Stardate = 12 August 2009<br />
| Maker = [[Chris|Christian Weston Chandler]]<br />
| Subject Matter = [[Image:Fanartn.PNG]] Fanart<br />
| Shirt = {{GreenWhiteStripe|text}}<br />
| previous = [[LOOK_at_the_truth!| LOOK at the truth!]]<br />
| next = [[CWC_Update_13_August_2009| CWC Update 13 August 2009]]<br />
}} </center><br />
<br />
{{quote|That's illegal everywhere and it is ''so'' wrong.}}<br />
<br />
===Transcript===<br />
<br />
[[Captain's Log]], Stardate April [sic] 12th, [[2009]]. <br />
<br />
Let's, uh, sort out one little topic of interest. If you're going to send me fanart [''takes off glasses''], please keep it clean. No [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|gross X-triple-X-rated sexual content]]. Eh, and also definitely worst of: do not send me anything of [[Pedofork|child sex]]. [''in a high pitch''] What the hell is wrong with you people? That's illegal everywhere and it is ''so'' wrong. I mean, I am like a family man; [[List of Chris's Lies|even though I'm not married, I have the mind like a family man]]. I mean, look at Homer Simpson. He's a family man. Do you think he does that with his children? Christ, are you stupid? Or look at Peter Griffin from ''[[Family Guy]]''. Do you think he's having, even Meg? [''grunts annoyedly''] Or even back in the day, [[I Love Lucy|Lucy Ball, Desi Arnez Jr.]], or even, huh, Dick Van Dyke, uh, Mary Tyler Moore, and Rich Junior? Anyways, point is: it's wrong. It grosses me out; it grosses everybody out, so just STOP IT! [''again in a high pitch''] [[Chris and hypocrisy|What the hell is wrong with you people?]] It makes me think that there is something wrong with this dang world, with such [[Chris|stupid, idiotic bastards]] like you drawing such things, creating them in their heads and then—WHAT. THE. '''FUCK'''! No more; keep it clean; keep it decent! I said, "like [[Masturbating and squirtin'|kisses]]." You know, like kissing scenes... and not X-rated, or even worse that I just talked about. What the hell is wrong with you people? Don't draw such [[shecameforcwc.jpg|grotesque pieces of work]] that's I cannot even feel comfortable by calling them... art. Cause they are ''not''! They are trash; [[4-cent_garbage.com|4-cent garbage]]! No more of that shit. <br />
<br />
Have a good day. Peace.<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[LOOK at the truth!]]|nextlink=[[CWC Update 13 August 2009]]|}}<br />
{{Captain's Log}}<br />
<br />
[[Category: Captain's log entries| 2009-08-12]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=User:IBAnderson&diff=126204User:IBAnderson2010-11-21T03:22:27Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>Hello, my name is Ian Brandon Anderson. I discovered [[Christian Weston Chandler|Christian Chandler]], or "Chris Chan" on [[Youtube]] through a friend in the summer of [[2009]], and have been [[Chris and anger|extremely offended]] by his attempts at [[Liquid Chris|impersonating me]], and mocking my original character, Pika the Hedgehog with his "[[Sonichu|Sonic-chu]]". I have e-mailed him about the matter, and he has refused to respond even after I threatened to take [[Chris and the law|legal action]], [[List of Chris's lies|which I shall!]]<br />
And another thing:<br />
{{RageQuote|I NAME IS NOT<br/>''CHRISTIAN....''<br/>''....WESTON....''<br/>''....SOMETHING!!!''}}<br />
<br />
{{Americunt}}<br />
{{White}}<br />
{{Christian}}<br />
{{Hex-Box}}<br />
{{Hero}}<br />
{{Virgin with rage}}<br />
{{Desi}}<br />
{{Irish}}<br />
{{AlecBensonLeary}}<br />
{{ClydeCash}}<br />
{{MartialArtist}}</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=DayOut&diff=121846DayOut2010-10-26T05:12:22Z<p>IBAnderson: /* DayOut5 */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''DayOut''' is a series of videos showing off the rare sight of Chris Chan's fat ass outdoors. He takes us on a trip around Ruckersville and shows us such wonderful places as a McDonald's, a Wal-Mart, and a Burger King! Can you feel the excitement? <br />
<br />
Chris holds the camera while driving, panning it from left to right to focus on whatever building he's talking about. It's a miracle he didn't get in an accident.<br />
<br />
His [[Son-chu|trusty steed]] shows mechanical issues throughout the videos, emitting an ungodly rattling sound when idling.<br />
<br />
==DayOut1==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout1<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|AMCxX5SjvFc}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[Wigwam]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
'''''Hello''''', today we are going on a [[Niggos|drive-by]] tour of some of my favorite [[McDonalds|places]] around... [[Ruckersville|''town'']], here and there. So we're gonna get in my car and I'm gonna... [[6 June 2010|drive around]].<br />
<br />
==DayOut2==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout2<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Yoo3v6EsPPY}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut1|DayOut1]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
And, ah, coming up on, first on our trip we take a- as we go north to [[Ruckersville]]. <br />
<br />
And right over to our right, we see the new [[McDonald's]] that has been built recently, lets get a closer look at that shortly. And over to my left is the new [[Wal-Mart]] that has been constructed, that has been finished for over a month now. Got everything in there, it's practically super-size.<br />
<br />
There is the new McDonald's, small in its stature, though it can stand to improvement, because you basically have to go around the building twice just to get to the drive-thru! They need to either add an exit lane out of here, around there, I don't know or make this whole building do a whole 180.<br />
<br />
Other than that, the Wal-mart is just fine the way it is. <br />
<br />
And in a moment up here, we'll take a closer look at the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]], that my father goes to sometimes.<br />
<br />
==DayOut3==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout3<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|KofndtgaAjk}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = {{Reason}} Reason<br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut5|DayOut5]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
This here is the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]] that my father, goes to ever- practically every morning for breakfast and sometimes I join him as well. But not every day. Sometimes.<br />
<br />
I am not a [[Chris and Health|fast-food addict]]. And I am [[obesity|not that big]], though I can stand to lose a few pounds.<br />
<br />
==DayOut5==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout5<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|4QLOg1D38pE}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = {{Reason}} Reason<br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut6|DayOut6]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
Next up, next stop on our drive by tour, we are in the, uh, we are in the shops by Forest Lake, where we have the, uh, [[Target]] where I sometimes walk around in.<br />
{{transcription}}<br />
<br />
==DayOut6==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout6<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|MvRyWYC_8yU}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Chris: An-a-and in a panoramic sort of view from a standpoint, this here is Fashion Square Shopping Center, at least the front of it. Where there are a great number of stores in there, You have a whole bunch-a buildin' stores, but the choolest ones gotta I, I would say gotta be Sears, Belk, JCPenny. Uhhh yes there is a Gamestop in there, an' a Spencers, and a Toys 'R' Us Express. Which actually gives good appeal back to the um, back to the shopping center, because they lost some of-they lost that PO when they closed the Kaybee Toy Store that used to be in there. And they will be openin' up a new book store soon to replace the one they had before.<br />
<br />
[pans camera to his face]<br />
<br />
On the way over here, a few other note-kit-notable locations. Where um, the Sears Club and the Wal-Mart next to the Doubletree Hotel. On the right side outgoing south, as well as Rio Hill Shopping Center with a Lowe's, a Chik-Fil-A, a Kroger's, Crutchfield, and Atlas Comic Book Store. And also, an IHOP, which my parents sometimes go to for dinner. Or lunch. I dunno. Its just one of those times. And also, there's uh, also up the road just a little bit, there's a Toys-R-Us. Up the road...northwise. And there are other places, of which uh, we'll be taken note of. Ah, also up the road some more, is a K-Mart and a Big Lots...a Burger King around there. And of course there are shops at the Barracks Road Shopping Center, which, I probably admit, there's another...Gamestop over there as well. But there's also a Barnes & Noble, as well as a...Fed-Ex/Kinkos, and a Harris Teeter and another Kroger's go over there (unintelligible). Bunch'a good stores over there. Shenanigans, and...that other store that's to it. Forget its name...I'll be waylaying(?) other locations short in just'a little bit. Stay tuned.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Transcription}}<br />
<br />
==DayOut8==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout8<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|zkSTURU3QLw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange|At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Anyway, uh, on our next drop by we're just gonna get a few little glimpses of the Downtown Mall. Y'all have seen it before as I have ah, recorded it mainly, to that, considerably [[Sonichu's Edge|Parkour]] thing. You know I guess you couldn't really care for the Parkour I, I mean, I tried, you know, I did try on that.<br />
<br />
Now I'm stopped at a traffic light here.<br />
<br />
C'mon. Come on.<br />
<br />
Anyway jus- just a few peeks down the few alleys of the uh, downtown mall area. Just a few peeks here and there.<br />
<br />
Ugh. Looks like we got the, ah, Albemarle Charlottesville Spirit Walk coming up. <br />
<br />
If you want to do this step by step that's your luxury and you're welcome to do that. I'm just going to put myself in here at the parking garage. So I'll check in at the next destination.<br />
<br />
==At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|x8HEUj-l-mw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
| next = [[WeighIn]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
Pretty much on this final segment of this, uh, tour around Charlottesvile, and, uh, some of my fun favorite choice places, we can drive down the t- down the corner, and the UVA, the University of Virginia, coming up on the corner. <br />
Don't forget traffic slopes, because, you know, red lights, they do come up.{{transcription}}<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Wigwam]]|nextlink=[[WeighIn]]}}<br />
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=DayOut&diff=121845DayOut2010-10-26T05:10:54Z<p>IBAnderson: /* DayOut5 */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''DayOut''' is a series of videos showing off the rare sight of Chris Chan's fat ass outdoors. He takes us on a trip around Ruckersville and shows us such wonderful places as a McDonald's, a Wal-Mart, and a Burger King! Can you feel the excitement? <br />
<br />
Chris holds the camera while driving, panning it from left to right to focus on whatever building he's talking about. It's a miracle he didn't get in an accident.<br />
<br />
His [[Son-chu|trusty steed]] shows mechanical issues throughout the videos, emitting an ungodly rattling sound when idling.<br />
<br />
==DayOut1==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout1<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|AMCxX5SjvFc}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[Wigwam]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
'''''Hello''''', today we are going on a [[Niggos|drive-by]] tour of some of my favorite [[McDonalds|places]] around... [[Ruckersville|''town'']], here and there. So we're gonna get in my car and I'm gonna... [[6 June 2010|drive around]].<br />
<br />
==DayOut2==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout2<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Yoo3v6EsPPY}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut1|DayOut1]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
And, ah, coming up on, first on our trip we take a- as we go north to [[Ruckersville]]. <br />
<br />
And right over to our right, we see the new [[McDonald's]] that has been built recently, lets get a closer look at that shortly. And over to my left is the new [[Wal-Mart]] that has been constructed, that has been finished for over a month now. Got everything in there, it's practically super-size.<br />
<br />
There is the new McDonald's, small in its stature, though it can stand to improvement, because you basically have to go around the building twice just to get to the drive-thru! They need to either add an exit lane out of here, around there, I don't know or make this whole building do a whole 180.<br />
<br />
Other than that, the Wal-mart is just fine the way it is. <br />
<br />
And in a moment up here, we'll take a closer look at the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]], that my father goes to sometimes.<br />
<br />
==DayOut3==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout3<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|KofndtgaAjk}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = {{Reason}} Reason<br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut5|DayOut5]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
This here is the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]] that my father, goes to ever- practically every morning for breakfast and sometimes I join him as well. But not every day. Sometimes.<br />
<br />
I am not a [[Chris and Health|fast-food addict]]. And I am [[obesity|not that big]], though I can stand to lose a few pounds.<br />
<br />
==DayOut5==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout5<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|4QLOg1D38pE}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = {{Reason}} Reason<br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut6|DayOut6]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
Next up, next stop on our drive by tour, we are in the, uh, we are in the shops by Forest Lake, where we have the [[Target]]<br />
{{transcription}}<br />
<br />
==DayOut6==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout6<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|MvRyWYC_8yU}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Chris: An-a-and in a panoramic sort of view from a standpoint, this here is Fashion Square Shopping Center, at least the front of it. Where there are a great number of stores in there, You have a whole bunch-a buildin' stores, but the choolest ones gotta I, I would say gotta be Sears, Belk, JCPenny. Uhhh yes there is a Gamestop in there, an' a Spencers, and a Toys 'R' Us Express. Which actually gives good appeal back to the um, back to the shopping center, because they lost some of-they lost that PO when they closed the Kaybee Toy Store that used to be in there. And they will be openin' up a new book store soon to replace the one they had before.<br />
<br />
[pans camera to his face]<br />
<br />
On the way over here, a few other note-kit-notable locations. Where um, the Sears Club and the Wal-Mart next to the Doubletree Hotel. On the right side outgoing south, as well as Rio Hill Shopping Center with a Lowe's, a Chik-Fil-A, a Kroger's, Crutchfield, and Atlas Comic Book Store. And also, an IHOP, which my parents sometimes go to for dinner. Or lunch. I dunno. Its just one of those times. And also, there's uh, also up the road just a little bit, there's a Toys-R-Us. Up the road...northwise. And there are other places, of which uh, we'll be taken note of. Ah, also up the road some more, is a K-Mart and a Big Lots...a Burger King around there. And of course there are shops at the Barracks Road Shopping Center, which, I probably admit, there's another...Gamestop over there as well. But there's also a Barnes & Noble, as well as a...Fed-Ex/Kinkos, and a Harris Teeter and another Kroger's go over there (unintelligible). Bunch'a good stores over there. Shenanigans, and...that other store that's to it. Forget its name...I'll be waylaying(?) other locations short in just'a little bit. Stay tuned.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Transcription}}<br />
<br />
==DayOut8==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout8<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|zkSTURU3QLw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange|At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Anyway, uh, on our next drop by we're just gonna get a few little glimpses of the Downtown Mall. Y'all have seen it before as I have ah, recorded it mainly, to that, considerably [[Sonichu's Edge|Parkour]] thing. You know I guess you couldn't really care for the Parkour I, I mean, I tried, you know, I did try on that.<br />
<br />
Now I'm stopped at a traffic light here.<br />
<br />
C'mon. Come on.<br />
<br />
Anyway jus- just a few peeks down the few alleys of the uh, downtown mall area. Just a few peeks here and there.<br />
<br />
Ugh. Looks like we got the, ah, Albemarle Charlottesville Spirit Walk coming up. <br />
<br />
If you want to do this step by step that's your luxury and you're welcome to do that. I'm just going to put myself in here at the parking garage. So I'll check in at the next destination.<br />
<br />
==At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|x8HEUj-l-mw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
| next = [[WeighIn]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
Pretty much on this final segment of this, uh, tour around Charlottesvile, and, uh, some of my fun favorite choice places, we can drive down the t- down the corner, and the UVA, the University of Virginia, coming up on the corner. <br />
Don't forget traffic slopes, because, you know, red lights, they do come up.{{transcription}}<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Wigwam]]|nextlink=[[WeighIn]]}}<br />
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=DayOut&diff=121844DayOut2010-10-26T05:09:52Z<p>IBAnderson: /* DayOut5 */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''DayOut''' is a series of videos showing off the rare sight of Chris Chan's fat ass outdoors. He takes us on a trip around Ruckersville and shows us such wonderful places as a McDonald's, a Wal-Mart, and a Burger King! Can you feel the excitement? <br />
<br />
Chris holds the camera while driving, panning it from left to right to focus on whatever building he's talking about. It's a miracle he didn't get in an accident.<br />
<br />
His [[Son-chu|trusty steed]] shows mechanical issues throughout the videos, emitting an ungodly rattling sound when idling.<br />
<br />
==DayOut1==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout1<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|AMCxX5SjvFc}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[Wigwam]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
'''''Hello''''', today we are going on a [[Niggos|drive-by]] tour of some of my favorite [[McDonalds|places]] around... [[Ruckersville|''town'']], here and there. So we're gonna get in my car and I'm gonna... [[6 June 2010|drive around]].<br />
<br />
==DayOut2==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout2<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Yoo3v6EsPPY}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut1|DayOut1]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
And, ah, coming up on, first on our trip we take a- as we go north to [[Ruckersville]]. <br />
<br />
And right over to our right, we see the new [[McDonald's]] that has been built recently, lets get a closer look at that shortly. And over to my left is the new [[Wal-Mart]] that has been constructed, that has been finished for over a month now. Got everything in there, it's practically super-size.<br />
<br />
There is the new McDonald's, small in its stature, though it can stand to improvement, because you basically have to go around the building twice just to get to the drive-thru! They need to either add an exit lane out of here, around there, I don't know or make this whole building do a whole 180.<br />
<br />
Other than that, the Wal-mart is just fine the way it is. <br />
<br />
And in a moment up here, we'll take a closer look at the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]], that my father goes to sometimes.<br />
<br />
==DayOut3==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout3<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|KofndtgaAjk}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = {{Reason}} Reason<br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut5|DayOut5]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
This here is the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]] that my father, goes to ever- practically every morning for breakfast and sometimes I join him as well. But not every day. Sometimes.<br />
<br />
I am not a [[Chris and Health|fast-food addict]]. And I am [[obesity|not that big]], though I can stand to lose a few pounds.<br />
<br />
==DayOut5==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout5<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|4QLOg1D38pE}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = {{Reason}} Reason<br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut6|DayOut6]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
Next up, next stop on our drive by tour, we have the, uh, shops by Forest Lake, where we have the [[Target]]<br />
{{transcription}}<br />
<br />
==DayOut6==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout6<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|MvRyWYC_8yU}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Chris: An-a-and in a panoramic sort of view from a standpoint, this here is Fashion Square Shopping Center, at least the front of it. Where there are a great number of stores in there, You have a whole bunch-a buildin' stores, but the choolest ones gotta I, I would say gotta be Sears, Belk, JCPenny. Uhhh yes there is a Gamestop in there, an' a Spencers, and a Toys 'R' Us Express. Which actually gives good appeal back to the um, back to the shopping center, because they lost some of-they lost that PO when they closed the Kaybee Toy Store that used to be in there. And they will be openin' up a new book store soon to replace the one they had before.<br />
<br />
[pans camera to his face]<br />
<br />
On the way over here, a few other note-kit-notable locations. Where um, the Sears Club and the Wal-Mart next to the Doubletree Hotel. On the right side outgoing south, as well as Rio Hill Shopping Center with a Lowe's, a Chik-Fil-A, a Kroger's, Crutchfield, and Atlas Comic Book Store. And also, an IHOP, which my parents sometimes go to for dinner. Or lunch. I dunno. Its just one of those times. And also, there's uh, also up the road just a little bit, there's a Toys-R-Us. Up the road...northwise. And there are other places, of which uh, we'll be taken note of. Ah, also up the road some more, is a K-Mart and a Big Lots...a Burger King around there. And of course there are shops at the Barracks Road Shopping Center, which, I probably admit, there's another...Gamestop over there as well. But there's also a Barnes & Noble, as well as a...Fed-Ex/Kinkos, and a Harris Teeter and another Kroger's go over there (unintelligible). Bunch'a good stores over there. Shenanigans, and...that other store that's to it. Forget its name...I'll be waylaying(?) other locations short in just'a little bit. Stay tuned.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Transcription}}<br />
<br />
==DayOut8==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout8<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|zkSTURU3QLw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange|At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Anyway, uh, on our next drop by we're just gonna get a few little glimpses of the Downtown Mall. Y'all have seen it before as I have ah, recorded it mainly, to that, considerably [[Sonichu's Edge|Parkour]] thing. You know I guess you couldn't really care for the Parkour I, I mean, I tried, you know, I did try on that.<br />
<br />
Now I'm stopped at a traffic light here.<br />
<br />
C'mon. Come on.<br />
<br />
Anyway jus- just a few peeks down the few alleys of the uh, downtown mall area. Just a few peeks here and there.<br />
<br />
Ugh. Looks like we got the, ah, Albemarle Charlottesville Spirit Walk coming up. <br />
<br />
If you want to do this step by step that's your luxury and you're welcome to do that. I'm just going to put myself in here at the parking garage. So I'll check in at the next destination.<br />
<br />
==At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|x8HEUj-l-mw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
| next = [[WeighIn]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
Pretty much on this final segment of this, uh, tour around Charlottesvile, and, uh, some of my fun favorite choice places, we can drive down the t- down the corner, and the UVA, the University of Virginia, coming up on the corner. <br />
Don't forget traffic slopes, because, you know, red lights, they do come up.{{transcription}}<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Wigwam]]|nextlink=[[WeighIn]]}}<br />
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=DayOut&diff=121842DayOut2010-10-26T05:07:57Z<p>IBAnderson: /* Transcription */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''DayOut''' is a series of videos showing off the rare sight of Chris Chan's fat ass outdoors. He takes us on a trip around Ruckersville and shows us such wonderful places as a McDonald's, a Wal-Mart, and a Burger King! Can you feel the excitement? <br />
<br />
Chris holds the camera while driving, panning it from left to right to focus on whatever building he's talking about. It's a miracle he didn't get in an accident.<br />
<br />
==DayOut1==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout1<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|AMCxX5SjvFc}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[Wigwam]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
'''''Hello''''', today we are going on a [[Niggos|drive-by]] tour of some of my favorite [[McDonalds|places]] around... [[Ruckersville|''town'']], here and there. So we're gonna get in my car and I'm gonna... [[6 June 2010|drive around]].<br />
<br />
==DayOut2==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout2<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Yoo3v6EsPPY}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut1|DayOut1]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
And, ah, coming up on, first on our trip we take a- as we go north to [[Ruckersville]]. <br />
<br />
And right over to our right, we see the new [[McDonald's]] that has been built recently, lets get a closer look at that shortly. And over to my left is the new [[Wal-Mart]] that has been constructed, that has been finished for over a month now. Got everything in there, it's practically super-size.<br />
<br />
There is the new McDonald's, small in its stature, though it can stand to improvement, because you basically have to go around the building twice just to get to the drive-thru! They need to either add an exit lane out of here, around there, I don't know or make this whole building do a whole 180.<br />
<br />
Other than that, the Wal-mart is just fine the way it is. <br />
<br />
And in a moment up here, we'll take a closer look at the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]], that my father goes to sometimes.<br />
<br />
==DayOut3==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout3<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|KofndtgaAjk}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = {{Reason}} Reason<br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut5|DayOut5]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
This here is the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]] that my father, goes to ever- practically every morning for breakfast and sometimes I join him as well. But not every day. Sometimes.<br />
<br />
I am not a [[Chris and Health|fast-food addict]]. And I am [[obesity|not that big]], though I can stand to lose a few pounds.<br />
<br />
==DayOut5==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout5<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|4QLOg1D38pE}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = {{Reason}} Reason<br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut6|DayOut6]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
{{transcription}}<br />
<br />
==DayOut6==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout6<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|MvRyWYC_8yU}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Chris: An-a-and in a panoramic sort of view from a standpoint, this here is Fashion Square Shopping Center, at least the front of it. Where there are a great number of stores in there, You have a whole bunch-a buildin' stores, but the choolest ones gotta I, I would say gotta be Sears, Belk, JCPenny. Uhhh yes there is a Gamestop in there, an' a Spencers, and a Toys 'R' Us Express. Which actually gives good appeal back to the um, back to the shopping center, because they lost some of-they lost that PO when they closed the Kaybee Toy Store that used to be in there. And they will be openin' up a new book store soon to replace the one they had before.<br />
<br />
[pans camera to his face]<br />
<br />
On the way over here, a few other note-kit-notable locations. Where um, the Sears Club and the Wal-Mart next to the Doubletree Hotel. On the right side outgoing south, as well as Rio Hill Shopping Center with a Lowe's, a Chik-Fil-A, a Kroger's, Crutchfield, and Atlas Comic Book Store. And also, an IHOP, which my parents sometimes go to for dinner. Or lunch. I dunno. Its just one of those times. And also, there's uh, also up the road just a little bit, there's a Toys-R-Us. Up the road...northwise. And there are other places, of which uh, we'll be taken note of. Ah, also up the road some more, is a K-Mart and a Big Lots...a Burger King around there. And of course there are shops at the Barracks Road Shopping Center, which, I probably admit, there's another...Gamestop over there as well. But there's also a Barnes & Noble, as well as a...Fed-Ex/Kinkos, and a Harris Teeter and another Kroger's go over there (unintelligible). Bunch'a good stores over there. Shenanigans, and...that other store that's to it. Forget its name...I'll be waylaying(?) other locations short in just'a little bit. Stay tuned.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Transcription}}<br />
<br />
==DayOut8==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout8<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|zkSTURU3QLw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange|At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Anyway, uh, on our next drop by we're just gonna get a few little glimpses of the Downtown Mall. Y'all have seen it before as I have ah, recorded it mainly, to that, considerably [[Sonichu's Edge|Parkour]] thing. You know I guess you couldn't really care for the Parkour I, I mean, I tried, you know, I did try on that.<br />
<br />
Now I'm stopped at a traffic light here.<br />
<br />
C'mon. Come on.<br />
<br />
Anyway jus- just a few peeks down the few alleys of the uh, downtown mall area. Just a few peeks here and there.<br />
<br />
Ugh. Looks like we got the, ah, Albemarle Charlottesville Spirit Walk coming up. <br />
<br />
If you want to do this step by step that's your luxury and you're welcome to do that. I'm just going to put myself in here at the parking garage. So I'll check in at the next destination.<br />
<br />
==At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|x8HEUj-l-mw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
| next = [[WeighIn]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
Pretty much on this final segment of this, uh, tour around Charlottesvile, and, uh, some of my fun favorite choice places, we can drive down the t- down the corner, and the UVA, the University of Virginia, coming up on the corner. <br />
Don't forget traffic slopes, because, you know, red lights, they do come up.{{transcription}}<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Wigwam]]|nextlink=[[WeighIn]]}}<br />
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=DayOut&diff=121841DayOut2010-10-26T05:06:41Z<p>IBAnderson: /* Transcription */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''DayOut''' is a series of videos showing off the rare sight of Chris Chan's fat ass outdoors. He takes us on a trip around Ruckersville and shows us such wonderful places as a McDonald's, a Wal-Mart, and a Burger King! Can you feel the excitement? <br />
<br />
Chris holds the camera while driving, panning it from left to right to focus on whatever building he's talking about. It's a miracle he didn't get in an accident.<br />
<br />
==DayOut1==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout1<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|AMCxX5SjvFc}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[Wigwam]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
'''''Hello''''', today we are going on a [[Niggos|drive-by]] tour of some of my favorite [[McDonalds|places]] around... [[Ruckersville|''town'']], here and there. So we're gonna get in my car and I'm gonna... [[6 June 2010|drive around]].<br />
<br />
==DayOut2==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout2<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Yoo3v6EsPPY}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut1|DayOut1]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
And, ah, coming up on, first on our trip we take a- as we go north to [[Ruckersville]]. <br />
<br />
And right over to our right, we see the new [[McDonald's]] that has been built recently, lets get a closer look at that shortly. And over to my left is the new [[Wal-Mart]] that has been constructed, that has been finished for over a month now. Got everything in there, it's practically super-size.<br />
<br />
There is the new McDonald's, small in its stature, though it can stand to improvement, because you basically have to go around the building twice just to get to the drive-thru! They need to either add an exit lane out of here, around there, I don't know or make this whole building do a whole 180.<br />
<br />
Other than that, the Wal-mart is just fine the way it is. <br />
<br />
And in a moment up here, we'll take a closer look at the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]], that my father goes to sometimes.<br />
<br />
==DayOut3==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout3<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|KofndtgaAjk}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = {{Reason}} Reason<br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut5|DayOut5]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
This here is the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]] that my father, goes to ever- practically every morning for breakfast and sometimes I join him as well. But not every day. Sometimes.<br />
<br />
I am not a [[Chris and Health|fast-food addict]]. And I am [[obesity|not that big]], though I can stand to lose a few pounds.<br />
<br />
==DayOut5==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout5<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|4QLOg1D38pE}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = {{Reason}} Reason<br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut6|DayOut6]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
{{transcription}}<br />
<br />
==DayOut6==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout6<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|MvRyWYC_8yU}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Chris: An-a-and in a panoramic sort of view from a standpoint, this here is Fashion Square Shopping Center, at least the front of it. Where there are a great number of stores in there, You have a whole bunch-a buildin' stores, but the choolest ones gotta I, I would say gotta be Sears, Belk, JCPenny. Uhhh yes there is a Gamestop in there, an' a Spencers, and a Toys 'R' Us Express. Which actually gives good appeal back to the um, back to the shopping center, because they lost some of-they lost that PO when they closed the Kaybee Toy Store that used to be in there. And they will be openin' up a new book store soon to replace the one they had before.<br />
<br />
[pans camera to his face]<br />
<br />
On the way over here, a few other note-kit-notable locations. Where um, the Sears Club and the Wal-Mart next to the Doubletree Hotel. On the right side outgoing south, as well as Rio Hill Shopping Center with a Lowe's, a Chik-Fil-A, a Kroger's, Crutchfield, and Atlas Comic Book Store. And also, an IHOP, which my parents sometimes go to for dinner. Or lunch. I dunno. Its just one of those times. And also, there's uh, also up the road just a little bit, there's a Toys-R-Us. Up the road...northwise. And there are other places, of which uh, we'll be taken note of. Ah, also up the road some more, is a K-Mart and a Big Lots...a Burger King around there. And of course there are shops at the Barracks Road Shopping Center, which, I probably admit, there's another...Gamestop over there as well. But there's also a Barnes & Noble, as well as a...Fed-Ex/Kinkos, and a Harris Teeter and another Kroger's go over there (unintelligible). Bunch'a good stores over there. Shenanigans, and...that other store that's to it. Forget its name...I'll be waylaying(?) other locations short in just'a little bit. Stay tuned.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Transcription}}<br />
<br />
==DayOut8==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout8<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|zkSTURU3QLw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange|At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Anyway, uh, on our next drop by we're just gonna get a few little glimpses of the Downtown Mall. Y'all have seen it before as I have ah, recorded it mainly, to that, considerably [[Sonichu's Edge|Parkour]] thing. You know I guess you couldn't really care for the Parkour I, I mean, I tried, you know, I did try on that.<br />
<br />
Now I'm stopped at a traffic light here.<br />
<br />
C'mon. Come on.<br />
<br />
Anyway jus- just a few peeks down the few alleys of the uh, downtown mall area. Just a few peeks here and there.<br />
<br />
Ugh. Looks like we got the, ah, Albemarle Charlottesville Spirit Walk coming up. <br />
<br />
If you want to do this step by step that's your luxury and you're welcome to do that. I'm just going to put myself in here at the parking garage. So I'll check in at the next destination.<br />
<br />
==At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|x8HEUj-l-mw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
| next = [[WeighIn]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
Pretty much on this final segment of this, uh, tour around Charlottesvile, and, uh, some of my fun favorite choice places, we can drive down the t- corner, and the UVA, the University of Virginia, just around the corner. <br />
Don't forget traffic slopes, because, you know, red lights, they do come up.{{transcription}}<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Wigwam]]|nextlink=[[WeighIn]]}}<br />
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=DayOut&diff=121838DayOut2010-10-26T05:02:29Z<p>IBAnderson: /* Transcription */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''DayOut''' is a series of videos showing off the rare sight of Chris Chan's fat ass outdoors. He takes us on a trip around Ruckersville and shows us such wonderful places as a McDonald's, a Wal-Mart, and a Burger King! Can you feel the excitement? <br />
<br />
Chris holds the camera while driving, panning it from left to right to focus on whatever building he's talking about. It's a miracle he didn't get in an accident.<br />
<br />
==DayOut1==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout1<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|AMCxX5SjvFc}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[Wigwam]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
'''''Hello''''', today we are going on a [[Niggos|drive-by]] tour of some of my favorite [[McDonalds|places]] around... [[Ruckersville|''town'']], here and there. So we're gonna get in my car and I'm gonna... [[6 June 2010|drive around]].<br />
<br />
==DayOut2==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout2<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Yoo3v6EsPPY}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut1|DayOut1]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
And, ah, coming up on, first on our trip we take a- as we go north to [[Ruckersville]]. <br />
<br />
And right over to our right, we see the new [[McDonald's]] that has been built recently, lets get a closer look at that shortly. And over to my left is the new [[Wal-Mart]] that has been constructed, that has been finished for over a month now. Got everything in there, it's practically super-size.<br />
<br />
There is the new McDonald's, small in its stature, though it can stand to improvement, because you basically have to go around the building twice just to get to the drive-thru! They need to either add an exit lane out of here, around there, I don't know or make this whole building do a whole 180.<br />
<br />
Other than that, the Wal-mart is just fine the way it is. <br />
<br />
And in a moment up here, we'll take a closer look at the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]], that my father goes to sometimes.<br />
<br />
==DayOut3==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout3<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|KofndtgaAjk}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = {{Reason}} Reason<br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut5|DayOut5]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
This here is the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]] that my father, goes to ever- practically every morning for breakfast and sometimes I join him as well. But not every day. Sometimes.<br />
<br />
I am not a [[Chris and Health|fast-food addict]]. And I am [[obesity|not that big]], though I can stand to lose a few pounds.<br />
<br />
==DayOut5==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout5<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|4QLOg1D38pE}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = {{Reason}} Reason<br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut6|DayOut6]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
{{transcription}}<br />
<br />
==DayOut6==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout6<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|MvRyWYC_8yU}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Chris: An-a-and in a panoramic sort of view from a standpoint, this here is Fashion Square Shopping Center, at least the front of it. Where there are a great number of stores in there, You have a whole bunch-a buildin' stores, but the choolest ones gotta I, I would say gotta be Sears, Belk, JCPenny. Uhhh yes there is a Gamestop in there, an' a Spencers, and a Toys 'R' Us Express. Which actually gives good appeal back to the um, back to the shopping center, because they lost some of-they lost that PO when they closed the Kaybee Toy Store that used to be in there. And they will be openin' up a new book store soon to replace the one they had before.<br />
<br />
[pans camera to his face]<br />
<br />
On the way over here, a few other note-kit-notable locations. Where um, the Sears Club and the Wal-Mart next to the Doubletree Hotel. On the right side outgoing south, as well as Rio Hill Shopping Center with a Lowe's, a Chik-Fil-A, a Kroger's, Crutchfield, and Atlas Comic Book Store. And also, an IHOP, which my parents sometimes go to for dinner. Or lunch. I dunno. Its just one of those times. And also, there's uh, also up the road just a little bit, there's a Toys-R-Us. Up the road...northwise. And there are other places, of which uh, we'll be taken note of. Ah, also up the road some more, is a K-Mart and a Big Lots...a Burger King around there. And of course there are shops at the Barracks Road Shopping Center, which, I probably admit, there's another...Gamestop over there as well. But there's also a Barnes & Noble, as well as a...Fed-Ex/Kinkos, and a Harris Teeter and another Kroger's go over there (unintelligible). Bunch'a good stores over there. Shenanigans, and...that other store that's to it. Forget its name...I'll be waylaying(?) other locations short in just'a little bit. Stay tuned.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Transcription}}<br />
<br />
==DayOut8==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout8<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|zkSTURU3QLw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange|At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Anyway, uh, on our next drop by we're just gonna get a few little glimpses of the Downtown Mall. Y'all have seen it before as I have ah, recorded it mainly, to that, considerably [[Sonichu's Edge|Parkour]] thing. You know I guess you couldn't really care for the Parkour I, I mean, I tried, you know, I did try on that.<br />
<br />
Now I'm stopped at a traffic light here.<br />
<br />
C'mon. Come on.<br />
<br />
Anyway jus- just a few peeks down the few alleys of the uh, downtown mall area. Just a few peeks here and there.<br />
<br />
Ugh. Looks like we got the, ah, Albemarle Charlottesville Spirit Walk coming up. <br />
<br />
If you want to do this step by step that's your luxury and you're welcome to do that. I'm just going to put myself in here at the parking garage. So I'll check in at the next destination.<br />
<br />
==At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|x8HEUj-l-mw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
| next = [[WeighIn]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
Pretty much on this final segment of this, uh, tour around Charlottesvile, and, uh, some of my fun favorite choice places, we can drive down the corner, and the UVA, the University of Virginia.{{transcription}}<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Wigwam]]|nextlink=[[WeighIn]]}}<br />
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=DayOut&diff=121836DayOut2010-10-26T05:01:11Z<p>IBAnderson: /* At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''DayOut''' is a series of videos showing off the rare sight of Chris Chan's fat ass outdoors. He takes us on a trip around Ruckersville and shows us such wonderful places as a McDonald's, a Wal-Mart, and a Burger King! Can you feel the excitement? <br />
<br />
Chris holds the camera while driving, panning it from left to right to focus on whatever building he's talking about. It's a miracle he didn't get in an accident.<br />
<br />
==DayOut1==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout1<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|AMCxX5SjvFc}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[Wigwam]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
'''''Hello''''', today we are going on a [[Niggos|drive-by]] tour of some of my favorite [[McDonalds|places]] around... [[Ruckersville|''town'']], here and there. So we're gonna get in my car and I'm gonna... [[6 June 2010|drive around]].<br />
<br />
==DayOut2==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout2<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Yoo3v6EsPPY}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut1|DayOut1]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
And, ah, coming up on, first on our trip we take a- as we go north to [[Ruckersville]]. <br />
<br />
And right over to our right, we see the new [[McDonald's]] that has been built recently, lets get a closer look at that shortly. And over to my left is the new [[Wal-Mart]] that has been constructed, that has been finished for over a month now. Got everything in there, it's practically super-size.<br />
<br />
There is the new McDonald's, small in its stature, though it can stand to improvement, because you basically have to go around the building twice just to get to the drive-thru! They need to either add an exit lane out of here, around there, I don't know or make this whole building do a whole 180.<br />
<br />
Other than that, the Wal-mart is just fine the way it is. <br />
<br />
And in a moment up here, we'll take a closer look at the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]], that my father goes to sometimes.<br />
<br />
==DayOut3==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout3<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|KofndtgaAjk}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = {{Reason}} Reason<br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut5|DayOut5]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
This here is the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]] that my father, goes to ever- practically every morning for breakfast and sometimes I join him as well. But not every day. Sometimes.<br />
<br />
I am not a [[Chris and Health|fast-food addict]]. And I am [[obesity|not that big]], though I can stand to lose a few pounds.<br />
<br />
==DayOut5==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout5<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|4QLOg1D38pE}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = {{Reason}} Reason<br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut6|DayOut6]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
{{transcription}}<br />
<br />
==DayOut6==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout6<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|MvRyWYC_8yU}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Chris: An-a-and in a panoramic sort of view from a standpoint, this here is Fashion Square Shopping Center, at least the front of it. Where there are a great number of stores in there, You have a whole bunch-a buildin' stores, but the choolest ones gotta I, I would say gotta be Sears, Belk, JCPenny. Uhhh yes there is a Gamestop in there, an' a Spencers, and a Toys 'R' Us Express. Which actually gives good appeal back to the um, back to the shopping center, because they lost some of-they lost that PO when they closed the Kaybee Toy Store that used to be in there. And they will be openin' up a new book store soon to replace the one they had before.<br />
<br />
[pans camera to his face]<br />
<br />
On the way over here, a few other note-kit-notable locations. Where um, the Sears Club and the Wal-Mart next to the Doubletree Hotel. On the right side outgoing south, as well as Rio Hill Shopping Center with a Lowe's, a Chik-Fil-A, a Kroger's, Crutchfield, and Atlas Comic Book Store. And also, an IHOP, which my parents sometimes go to for dinner. Or lunch. I dunno. Its just one of those times. And also, there's uh, also up the road just a little bit, there's a Toys-R-Us. Up the road...northwise. And there are other places, of which uh, we'll be taken note of. Ah, also up the road some more, is a K-Mart and a Big Lots...a Burger King around there. And of course there are shops at the Barracks Road Shopping Center, which, I probably admit, there's another...Gamestop over there as well. But there's also a Barnes & Noble, as well as a...Fed-Ex/Kinkos, and a Harris Teeter and another Kroger's go over there (unintelligible). Bunch'a good stores over there. Shenanigans, and...that other store that's to it. Forget its name...I'll be waylaying(?) other locations short in just'a little bit. Stay tuned.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Transcription}}<br />
<br />
==DayOut8==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout8<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|zkSTURU3QLw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange|At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Anyway, uh, on our next drop by we're just gonna get a few little glimpses of the Downtown Mall. Y'all have seen it before as I have ah, recorded it mainly, to that, considerably [[Sonichu's Edge|Parkour]] thing. You know I guess you couldn't really care for the Parkour I, I mean, I tried, you know, I did try on that.<br />
<br />
Now I'm stopped at a traffic light here.<br />
<br />
C'mon. Come on.<br />
<br />
Anyway jus- just a few peeks down the few alleys of the uh, downtown mall area. Just a few peeks here and there.<br />
<br />
Ugh. Looks like we got the, ah, Albemarle Charlottesville Spirit Walk coming up. <br />
<br />
If you want to do this step by step that's your luxury and you're welcome to do that. I'm just going to put myself in here at the parking garage. So I'll check in at the next destination.<br />
<br />
==At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|x8HEUj-l-mw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
| next = [[WeighIn]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
Pretty much on this final segment of this, uh, tour around Charlottesvile, and, uh, some of my fun favorite choice places, we can drive down the tour<br />
{{transcription}}<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Wigwam]]|nextlink=[[WeighIn]]}}<br />
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=DayOut&diff=121834DayOut2010-10-26T04:59:52Z<p>IBAnderson: /* At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''DayOut''' is a series of videos showing off the rare sight of Chris Chan's fat ass outdoors. He takes us on a trip around Ruckersville and shows us such wonderful places as a McDonald's, a Wal-Mart, and a Burger King! Can you feel the excitement? <br />
<br />
Chris holds the camera while driving, panning it from left to right to focus on whatever building he's talking about. It's a miracle he didn't get in an accident.<br />
<br />
==DayOut1==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout1<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|AMCxX5SjvFc}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[Wigwam]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
'''''Hello''''', today we are going on a [[Niggos|drive-by]] tour of some of my favorite [[McDonalds|places]] around... [[Ruckersville|''town'']], here and there. So we're gonna get in my car and I'm gonna... [[6 June 2010|drive around]].<br />
<br />
==DayOut2==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout2<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Yoo3v6EsPPY}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut1|DayOut1]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
And, ah, coming up on, first on our trip we take a- as we go north to [[Ruckersville]]. <br />
<br />
And right over to our right, we see the new [[McDonald's]] that has been built recently, lets get a closer look at that shortly. And over to my left is the new [[Wal-Mart]] that has been constructed, that has been finished for over a month now. Got everything in there, it's practically super-size.<br />
<br />
There is the new McDonald's, small in its stature, though it can stand to improvement, because you basically have to go around the building twice just to get to the drive-thru! They need to either add an exit lane out of here, around there, I don't know or make this whole building do a whole 180.<br />
<br />
Other than that, the Wal-mart is just fine the way it is. <br />
<br />
And in a moment up here, we'll take a closer look at the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]], that my father goes to sometimes.<br />
<br />
==DayOut3==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout3<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|KofndtgaAjk}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = {{Reason}} Reason<br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut5|DayOut5]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
This here is the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]] that my father, goes to ever- practically every morning for breakfast and sometimes I join him as well. But not every day. Sometimes.<br />
<br />
I am not a [[Chris and Health|fast-food addict]]. And I am [[obesity|not that big]], though I can stand to lose a few pounds.<br />
<br />
==DayOut5==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout5<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|4QLOg1D38pE}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = {{Reason}} Reason<br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut6|DayOut6]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
{{transcription}}<br />
<br />
==DayOut6==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout6<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|MvRyWYC_8yU}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Chris: An-a-and in a panoramic sort of view from a standpoint, this here is Fashion Square Shopping Center, at least the front of it. Where there are a great number of stores in there, You have a whole bunch-a buildin' stores, but the choolest ones gotta I, I would say gotta be Sears, Belk, JCPenny. Uhhh yes there is a Gamestop in there, an' a Spencers, and a Toys 'R' Us Express. Which actually gives good appeal back to the um, back to the shopping center, because they lost some of-they lost that PO when they closed the Kaybee Toy Store that used to be in there. And they will be openin' up a new book store soon to replace the one they had before.<br />
<br />
[pans camera to his face]<br />
<br />
On the way over here, a few other note-kit-notable locations. Where um, the Sears Club and the Wal-Mart next to the Doubletree Hotel. On the right side outgoing south, as well as Rio Hill Shopping Center with a Lowe's, a Chik-Fil-A, a Kroger's, Crutchfield, and Atlas Comic Book Store. And also, an IHOP, which my parents sometimes go to for dinner. Or lunch. I dunno. Its just one of those times. And also, there's uh, also up the road just a little bit, there's a Toys-R-Us. Up the road...northwise. And there are other places, of which uh, we'll be taken note of. Ah, also up the road some more, is a K-Mart and a Big Lots...a Burger King around there. And of course there are shops at the Barracks Road Shopping Center, which, I probably admit, there's another...Gamestop over there as well. But there's also a Barnes & Noble, as well as a...Fed-Ex/Kinkos, and a Harris Teeter and another Kroger's go over there (unintelligible). Bunch'a good stores over there. Shenanigans, and...that other store that's to it. Forget its name...I'll be waylaying(?) other locations short in just'a little bit. Stay tuned.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Transcription}}<br />
<br />
==DayOut8==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout8<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|zkSTURU3QLw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange|At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Anyway, uh, on our next drop by we're just gonna get a few little glimpses of the Downtown Mall. Y'all have seen it before as I have ah, recorded it mainly, to that, considerably [[Sonichu's Edge|Parkour]] thing. You know I guess you couldn't really care for the Parkour I, I mean, I tried, you know, I did try on that.<br />
<br />
Now I'm stopped at a traffic light here.<br />
<br />
C'mon. Come on.<br />
<br />
Anyway jus- just a few peeks down the few alleys of the uh, downtown mall area. Just a few peeks here and there.<br />
<br />
Ugh. Looks like we got the, ah, Albemarle Charlottesville Spirit Walk coming up. <br />
<br />
If you want to do this step by step that's your luxury and you're welcome to do that. I'm just going to put myself in here at the parking garage. So I'll check in at the next destination.<br />
<br />
==At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|x8HEUj-l-mw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
| next = [[WeighIn]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
Pretty much on this final segment of this, uh, tour around Charlottesvile,<br />
{{transcription}}<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Wigwam]]|nextlink=[[WeighIn]]}}<br />
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=DayOut&diff=121832DayOut2010-10-26T04:58:51Z<p>IBAnderson: /* Transcription */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''DayOut''' is a series of videos showing off the rare sight of Chris Chan's fat ass outdoors. He takes us on a trip around Ruckersville and shows us such wonderful places as a McDonald's, a Wal-Mart, and a Burger King! Can you feel the excitement? <br />
<br />
Chris holds the camera while driving, panning it from left to right to focus on whatever building he's talking about. It's a miracle he didn't get in an accident.<br />
<br />
==DayOut1==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout1<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|AMCxX5SjvFc}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[Wigwam]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
'''''Hello''''', today we are going on a [[Niggos|drive-by]] tour of some of my favorite [[McDonalds|places]] around... [[Ruckersville|''town'']], here and there. So we're gonna get in my car and I'm gonna... [[6 June 2010|drive around]].<br />
<br />
==DayOut2==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout2<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Yoo3v6EsPPY}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut1|DayOut1]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
And, ah, coming up on, first on our trip we take a- as we go north to [[Ruckersville]]. <br />
<br />
And right over to our right, we see the new [[McDonald's]] that has been built recently, lets get a closer look at that shortly. And over to my left is the new [[Wal-Mart]] that has been constructed, that has been finished for over a month now. Got everything in there, it's practically super-size.<br />
<br />
There is the new McDonald's, small in its stature, though it can stand to improvement, because you basically have to go around the building twice just to get to the drive-thru! They need to either add an exit lane out of here, around there, I don't know or make this whole building do a whole 180.<br />
<br />
Other than that, the Wal-mart is just fine the way it is. <br />
<br />
And in a moment up here, we'll take a closer look at the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]], that my father goes to sometimes.<br />
<br />
==DayOut3==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout3<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|KofndtgaAjk}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = {{Reason}} Reason<br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut5|DayOut5]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
This here is the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]] that my father, goes to ever- practically every morning for breakfast and sometimes I join him as well. But not every day. Sometimes.<br />
<br />
I am not a [[Chris and Health|fast-food addict]]. And I am [[obesity|not that big]], though I can stand to lose a few pounds.<br />
<br />
==DayOut5==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout5<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|4QLOg1D38pE}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = {{Reason}} Reason<br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut6|DayOut6]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
{{transcription}}<br />
<br />
==DayOut6==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout6<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|MvRyWYC_8yU}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Chris: An-a-and in a panoramic sort of view from a standpoint, this here is Fashion Square Shopping Center, at least the front of it. Where there are a great number of stores in there, You have a whole bunch-a buildin' stores, but the choolest ones gotta I, I would say gotta be Sears, Belk, JCPenny. Uhhh yes there is a Gamestop in there, an' a Spencers, and a Toys 'R' Us Express. Which actually gives good appeal back to the um, back to the shopping center, because they lost some of-they lost that PO when they closed the Kaybee Toy Store that used to be in there. And they will be openin' up a new book store soon to replace the one they had before.<br />
<br />
[pans camera to his face]<br />
<br />
On the way over here, a few other note-kit-notable locations. Where um, the Sears Club and the Wal-Mart next to the Doubletree Hotel. On the right side outgoing south, as well as Rio Hill Shopping Center with a Lowe's, a Chik-Fil-A, a Kroger's, Crutchfield, and Atlas Comic Book Store. And also, an IHOP, which my parents sometimes go to for dinner. Or lunch. I dunno. Its just one of those times. And also, there's uh, also up the road just a little bit, there's a Toys-R-Us. Up the road...northwise. And there are other places, of which uh, we'll be taken note of. Ah, also up the road some more, is a K-Mart and a Big Lots...a Burger King around there. And of course there are shops at the Barracks Road Shopping Center, which, I probably admit, there's another...Gamestop over there as well. But there's also a Barnes & Noble, as well as a...Fed-Ex/Kinkos, and a Harris Teeter and another Kroger's go over there (unintelligible). Bunch'a good stores over there. Shenanigans, and...that other store that's to it. Forget its name...I'll be waylaying(?) other locations short in just'a little bit. Stay tuned.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Transcription}}<br />
<br />
==DayOut8==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout8<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|zkSTURU3QLw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange|At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Anyway, uh, on our next drop by we're just gonna get a few little glimpses of the Downtown Mall. Y'all have seen it before as I have ah, recorded it mainly, to that, considerably [[Sonichu's Edge|Parkour]] thing. You know I guess you couldn't really care for the Parkour I, I mean, I tried, you know, I did try on that.<br />
<br />
Now I'm stopped at a traffic light here.<br />
<br />
C'mon. Come on.<br />
<br />
Anyway jus- just a few peeks down the few alleys of the uh, downtown mall area. Just a few peeks here and there.<br />
<br />
Ugh. Looks like we got the, ah, Albemarle Charlottesville Spirit Walk coming up. <br />
<br />
If you want to do this step by step that's your luxury and you're welcome to do that. I'm just going to put myself in here at the parking garage. So I'll check in at the next destination.<br />
<br />
==At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|x8HEUj-l-mw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
| next = [[WeighIn]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
Pretty much on this final section of this, uh, tour of Charlottesvile,<br />
{{transcription}}<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Wigwam]]|nextlink=[[WeighIn]]}}<br />
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=DayOut&diff=121812DayOut2010-10-26T03:45:05Z<p>IBAnderson: /* Transcription */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''DayOut''' is a series of videos showing off the rare sight of Chris Chan's fat ass outdoors. He takes us on a trip around Ruckersville and shows us such wonderful places as a McDonald's, a Wal-Mart, and a Burger King! Can you feel the excitement? <br />
<br />
Chris holds the camera while driving, panning it from left to right to focus on whatever building he's talking about. It's a miracle he didn't get in an accident.<br />
<br />
==DayOut1==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout1<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|AMCxX5SjvFc}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[Wigwam]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
'''''Hello''''', today we are going on a [[Niggos|drive-by]] tour of some of my favorite [[McDonalds|places]] around... [[Ruckersville|''town'']], here and there. So we're gonna get in my car and I'm gonna... [[6 June 2010|drive around]].<br />
<br />
==DayOut2==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout2<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Yoo3v6EsPPY}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut1|DayOut1]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
And, ah, coming up on, first on our trip we take a- as we go north to [[Ruckersville]]. <br />
<br />
And right over to our right, we see the new [[McDonald's]] that has been built recently, lets get a closer look at that shortly. And over to my left is the new [[Wal-Mart]] that has been constructed, that has been finished for over a month now. Got everything in there, it's practically super-size.<br />
<br />
There is the new McDonald's, small in its stature, though it can stand to improvement, because you basically have to go around the building twice just to get to the drive-thru! They need to either add an exit lane out of here, around there, I don't know or make this whole building do a whole 180.<br />
<br />
Other than that, the Wal-mart is just fine the way it is. <br />
<br />
And in a moment up here, we'll take a closer look at the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]], that my father goes to sometimes.<br />
<br />
==DayOut3==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout3<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|KofndtgaAjk}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut6|DayOut6]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
This here is the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]] that my father, goes to ever- practically every morning for breakfast and sometimes I join him as well. But not every day. Sometimes.<br />
<br />
I am not a [[Chris and Health|fast-food addict]]. And I am [[obesity|not that big]], though I can stand to lose a few pounds.<br />
<br />
==DayOut6==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout6<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|MvRyWYC_8yU}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Chris: An-a-and in a panoramic sort of view from a standpoint, this here is Fashion Square Shopping Center, at least the front of it. Where there are a great number of stores in there, You have a whole bunch-a buildin' stores, but the choolest ones gotta I, I would say gotta be Sears, Built[(?), JCPenny. Uhhh yes there is a Gamestop in there, an' a Spencers, and a Toys 'R' Us Express. Which actually gives good appeal back to the um, back to the shopping center, because they lost some of-they lost that PO when they closed the Kaybee Toy Store that used to be in there. And they will be openin' up a new book store soon to replace the one they had before.<br />
<br />
[pans camera to his face]<br />
<br />
On the way over here, a few other note-kit-notable locations. Where um, the Sears Club and the Wal-Mart next to the Gullatree(?) Hotel. On the right side outgoing south, as well as Rawhill(?) Shopping Center with a Lull's(?), a Chik-Fil-A, a Truger's(?), Truckspiel(?), and App(unintelligible) Comic/ Book Store. And also, an IHOP, which my parents sometimes go to for dinner. Or lunch. I dunno. Its just one of those times. And also, there's uh, also up the road just a little bit, there's a Toys-R-Us. Up the road (unintelligible). And there are other places, of which uh, we'll be taking note of. Ah, also up the road some more, is a K-Mart and a Big Lots...a Burger King around there. (unintelligible) the Faxroad(?) Shopping Center, which, I probably admit, there's another...Gamestop over there as well. But there's also a Barnes & Noble, as well as a...Fed-Ex/Kinkos, and (unintelligible) go over there (unintelligible). Bunch'a good stores over there. Shenanigans, and...that other store that's to it. Forget its name...I'll be waylaying(?) other locations short in just'a little bit. Stay tuned.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Transcription}}<br />
<br />
==DayOut8==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout8<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|zkSTURU3QLw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange|At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Anyway, uh, on our next drop by we're just gonna get a few little glimpses of the Downtown Mall. Y'all have seen it before as I have ah, recorded it mainly, to that, considerably [[Sonichu's Edge|Parkour]] thing. You know I guess you couldn't really care for the Parkour I, I mean, I tried, you know, I did try on that.<br />
<br />
Now I'm stopped at a traffic light here.<br />
<br />
C'mon. Come on.<br />
<br />
Anyway jus- just a few peeks down the few alleys of the uh, downtown mall area. Just a few peeks here and there.<br />
<br />
Ugh. Looks like we got the, ah, Albemarle Charlottesville Spirit Walk coming up. <br />
<br />
If you want to do this step by step that's your luxury and you're welcome to do that. I'm just going to put myself in here at the parking garage. So I'll check in at the next destination.<br />
<br />
==At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|x8HEUj-l-mw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
| next = [[WeighIn]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
{{transcription}}<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Wigwam]]|nextlink=[[WeighIn]]}}<br />
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=DayOut&diff=121810DayOut2010-10-26T03:42:44Z<p>IBAnderson: /* Transcription */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''DayOut''' is a series of videos showing off the rare sight of Chris Chan's fat ass outdoors. He takes us on a trip around Ruckersville and shows us such wonderful places as a McDonald's, a Wal-Mart, and a Burger King! Can you feel the excitement? <br />
<br />
Chris holds the camera while driving, panning it from left to right to focus on whatever building he's talking about. It's a miracle he didn't get in an accident.<br />
<br />
==DayOut1==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout1<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|AMCxX5SjvFc}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[Wigwam]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
'''''Hello''''', today we are going on a [[Niggos|drive-by]] tour of some of my favorite [[McDonalds|places]] around... [[Ruckersville|''town'']], here and there. So we're gonna get in my car and I'm gonna... [[6 June 2010|drive around]].<br />
<br />
==DayOut2==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout2<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Yoo3v6EsPPY}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut1|DayOut1]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
And, ah, coming up on, first on our trip we take a- as we go north to [[Ruckersville]]. <br />
<br />
And right over to our right, we see the new [[McDonald's]] that has been built recently, lets get a closer look at that shortly. And over to my left is the new [[Wal-Mart]] that has been constructed, that has been finished for over a month now. Got everything in there, it's practically super-size.<br />
<br />
There is the new McDonald's, small in its stature, though it can stand to improvement, because you basically have to go around the building twice just to get to the drive-thru! They need to either add an exit lane out of here, around there, I don't know or make this whole building do a whole 180.<br />
<br />
Other than that, the Wal-mart is just fine the way it is. <br />
<br />
And in a moment up here, we'll take a closer look at the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]], that my father goes to sometimes.<br />
<br />
==DayOut3==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout3<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|KofndtgaAjk}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut6|DayOut6]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
This here is the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]] that my father, goes to ever- practically every morning for breakfast and sometimes I join him as well. But not every day. Sometimes.<br />
<br />
I am not a [[Chris and Health|fast-food addict]]. And I am [[obesity|not that big]], though I can stand to lose a few pounds.<br />
<br />
==DayOut6==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout6<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|MvRyWYC_8yU}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Chris: An-a-and in a panoramic sort of view from a standpoint, this here is Fashion Square Shopping Center, at least the front of it. Where there a great number of stores in there, You have a whole bunch-a buildin' stores, but the choolest ones gotta I, I would say gotta be Sears, Built[(?), JCPenny. Uhhh yes there is a Gamestop in there, an' a Spencers, and a Toys 'R' Us Express. Which actually gives good appeal back to the um, back to the shopping center, because they lost some of-they lost that PO when they closed the Kaybee Toy Store that used to be in there. And they will be openin' up a new book store soon to replace the one they had before.<br />
<br />
[pans camera to his face]<br />
<br />
On the way over here, a few other note-kit-notable locations. Where um, the Sears Club and the Wal-Mart next to the Gullatree(?) Hotel. On the right side outgoing south, as well as Rawhill(?) Shopping Center with a Lull's(?), a Chik-Fil-A, a Truger's(?), Truckspiel(?), and App(unintelligible) Comic/ Book Store. And also, an IHOP, which my parents sometimes go to for dinner. Or lunch. I dunno. Its just one of those times. And also, there's uh, also up the road just a little bit, there's a Toys-R-Us. Up the road (unintelligible). And there are other places, of which uh, we'll be taking note of. Ah, also up the road some more, is a K-Mart and a Big Lots...a Burger King around there. (unintelligible) the Faxroad(?) Shopping Center, which, I probably admit, there's another...Gamestop over there as well. But there's also a Barnes & Noble, as well as a...Fed-Ex/Kinkos, and (unintelligible) go over there (unintelligible). Bunch'a good stores over there. Shenanigans, and...that other store that's to it. Forget its name...I'll be waylaying(?) other locations short in just'a little bit. Stay tuned.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Transcription}}<br />
<br />
==DayOut8==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Dayout8<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|zkSTURU3QLw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = Unclear<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]<br />
| next = [[DayOut#At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange|At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
Anyway, uh, on our next drop by we're just gonna get a few little glimpses of the Downtown Mall. Y'all have seen it before as I have ah, recorded it mainly, to that, considerably [[Sonichu's Edge|Parkour]] thing. You know I guess you couldn't really care for the Parkour I, I mean, I tried, you know, I did try on that.<br />
<br />
Now I'm stopped at a traffic light here.<br />
<br />
C'mon. Come on.<br />
<br />
Anyway jus- just a few peeks down the few alleys of the uh, downtown mall area. Just a few peeks here and there.<br />
<br />
Ugh. Looks like we got the, ah, Albemarle Charlottesville Spirit Walk coming up. <br />
<br />
If you want to do this step by step that's your luxury and you're welcome to do that. I'm just going to put myself in here at the parking garage. So I'll check in at the next destination.<br />
<br />
==At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|x8HEUj-l-mw}}<br />
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = {{Power|text}}<br />
| style = <br />
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster<br />
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]<br />
| next = [[WeighIn]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
====Transcription====<br />
<br />
{{transcription}}<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Wigwam]]|nextlink=[[WeighIn]]}}<br />
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=6_June_2010&diff=1217866 June 20102010-10-26T02:10:56Z<p>IBAnderson: /* Transcript */</p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:CWC drunk driving.png|thumb|A summary of the events of 4 June 2010.]]<br />
<br />
'''June062010.MOV''' is a video uploaded by Chris on 6 [[June 2010]] wherein he discusses a plan he hatched while drinking to stalk [[Michael Snyder]] at the [[The GAMe PLACe]]. This is after mentioning less than a week ago that he was leaving the [[Internet]] [[Chris and hypocrisy|for the fourth time]]. <br />
<br />
In early June 2010, based off his own description, Chris was [[alcohol|at a bar]] in Charlottesville when he drove off to The GAMe PLACe to go after Michael Snyder, leading to a confrontation with a [[manager]] when Chris took out his camera and attempted to take pictures of Snyder [[pedofork|and his daughter]]. Chris got back in his car and attempted to run Michael over twice before attempting to leave. After a brief pursuit by [[jerkop|the police]] in the parking lot, Chris stopped [[Son-Chu|his car]] when he was cornered by the cops and the Snyders. He also reported getting into a fight with Michael's daughter afterwards before being confronted by the police. <br />
<br />
Despite his stalkerish behavior and nearly killing Michael, Chris was let off with a warning for what happened.<br />
<br />
Chris, probably scared of their reaction, never told [[Bob]] and [[Barb]] anything at all about this major incident, and they did not know anything about until the [[Matthew Noble call]] two months later.<br />
<br />
==Background==<br />
On 6 June 2010, Michael Synder commented on several Chris related [[YouTube]] videos:<br />
<br />
{{quote|Christian is in my parking lot right now being grilled by the police. He took pictures of my daughter and tried to run me over with his car. they witness this, and I bet they still do nothing about it.|[[Michael Snyder]] on YouTube}}<br />
<br />
It is also worth noting that these events occurred on the 21st anniversary of the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tiananmen_Square_Protests_of_1989 1989 Tiananmen Square protests] in which a random person stood in front of a tank, whose driver, unlike Chris, did not try to run the person over.<br />
<br />
==Description==<br />
{{quotebox|**Do Not Believe Anything that has been posted On The Internet, Outside of This YouTube Account, as of May 28, 2010.<br />
<br />
This Includes EVERYTHING that was said OUTSIDE of here, the Once Was [[Cwcipedia]] Before its Most Recent Hacking and my [[OKCupid]] Page.<br />
<br />
[[Ego|I have spoken.]]<br />
<br />
Have a good day,<br />
<br />
Christian W. Chandler}}<br />
<br />
==Video==<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = June062010.MOV<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|dMZAsb2ALIM}}<br />
| stardate = 6 June 2010<br />
| subject = {{Rumours|Rumors}}<br />
| style = {{Reason|text}}<br />
| saga = {{Game Place|text}}<br />
| shirt = {{RedBlackTrim}} The Happy Jack<br />
| previous = [[100 2189]]<br />
| next = [[EXCLUSIVE Manchester High School 2000 Reunion Required NOW]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
[''sigh''] June 6, 2010. At this, uh, moment, I, uh, have an understanding that there are misconceptions and rumors being spread about me, which, uh, I would like to state, very- right off, that rumors- spread rumors about anybody, especially to make them look terrible, is just ''not cool''. But anyway, uh, first off, I would like to state, I do not, quote unquote, "''piddle'' my [[Chandler_Cats|cats]]." I r- I, the only parts I touch on them are their back and their heads. Nothing more. <br />
<br />
[''A long pause, where Chris seems about to speak several times.'']<br />
<br />
[[Image:Tianasquare.jpg|thumb|200px|Michael Snyder in [[China|Tiananmen Square]]]]<br />
<br />
Anyway. After that, let me tell you about, uh, what happened, uh... [''removes [[glasses]]''] ...last Friday at the, uh, fourth of June. Hm. Okay, so it was after- [[Fridays After Five]], I went over to a bar, and I had a [[Alcohol|Bud]]. A bottle of Bud. And I p- and then I played some solitaire on my [[DS]], while I- while I waited to the- uh, while I waited to the hour. But then, about, about three-quarters of an hour through, because I had a camera in my possession right then, I had the impulse of, "Hey, I'll go over to th- I'll go over to [[The GAMe PLACe|the PLACe]] and take a picture of Michael Snyder so that I can print it out later and [[CWC is Angry|use it as a dartboard]]." So then- so that- that's just basically what happened. So then I drove over to the parking lot, of the PLACe, in front of Staples, and then I made my way to the window to take a picture of ''him'', and nobody else. ...Right through the store window. Through the store window, just him. And that, uh, that, I was not alone there in front of the, uh, window, there was another dude who was apparently on his side and recognized me. He wanted to start a [[CWC_Fighter|fight]], but, in a fi- in a fight or flee, I decided to flee. So I went to [[Son-Chu|my car]], the man ran in and got Michael, and then Michael ''jumped'' in front of my car. He jumped in front of my car. He- as a matter of fact, he jumped on to the top of my hood! He was looming over my windshield! <br />
<br />
It was horrifying. So I backed my car up. I backed my car up. And I- and I backed it up to my r- to my right. Then I see that there was, like, a couple of [[Jerkop|police]] cars in front of me, so that was like the wrong way to go, I should have backed up the other way. But anyway. So, to go around them... I went to another... aisle, and I drove through that. And then, so then I- then I decided to make a left turn. Bad, bad m- bad move right there. 'Cause he jumped in front of my car again, risking his own life! I could have been going top speed! He was lucky he didn't get hurt, as far as I know! Though I did not run him over. Jumped in front of my car, so I back up. And then I tried going around. And then this- and then this woman, I don't know who- I do not know who the [[Chris and Censorship|blank]] she is, she jumps in front of my car, so I stop again. And then I started backing up, and then I get stuck from behind, and then I'm trapped. Between the, between police and Michael and whoever the hell this woman was. So then I sorted it out with the police, uh, they dele- they deleted the pictures, and, uh, and the wom- and then the woman... t- the woman came to me right up front and accused me of things, like, you know, [[Nudes|see- seeing naked pictures on me on the internet]], and then accused me of child pornography! [[Rule 34|''I'' am ''not''... a pornographer of any sort!]] And any [[Nudes|naked pictures]] of me on the internet were either tricked from me by the [[trolls]], where they s- deceived me, or I was blackmailed! And there ''were'' a number of blackmailings! As th- as they have sss- ratted themselves out, on the CWC- on their websites such as the [[CWCki]] or even the [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] webpage. Anyway, the... through- and also, uh, Michael just basically loomed into me, and he said, he just basically shouted from me, [[Death threats|"YOU'RE DEAD!]] [[I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD|YOU'RE DEAD!"]] Right, if I had the right mind, I would send, I would give him a charge of verbal, serve him a charge of verbal harassment! [[Chris and English|So there's already under trouble for quote-unquote trespassing.]]<br />
<br />
[''Another pause interspersed with attempts to speak.'']<br />
<br />
And then, so, with that I told the police about... I reminded them, eventually, of- of the trolls of the internet that have, uh, been going against me, and so I warned them of websites such as the CWCki. ''And'' I named a troll or two. I'm not gonna say, uh, [[Clyde Cash|who I named]]. But anyway, they let me go with a- anyway I was let go with a warning, out of the parking lot. The point- th- the point is, the only pictures I was taking were of Michael Snyder. Nobody else! No children. ...I want to make that very clear. And also, I do not want any more rumors spread at all! It's bad enough you have to have ruined- you had to messed up my once-good name, and have to transfer it to real life. Which may, which, uh, I basically got that impression first-hand for practically the first time, so proved that theory, and it made me feel sad, because I am not the villain! The trolls are the villains. Because they spread- 'cause they troll me. They make up the crap. They exaggerate and/or twist around my truths. My spoken word. And they give me wrongful mislabelings. [[It's UGH!|I'm ''straight''!]] And they use damn Photoshop! To make it look like otherwise.<br />
<br />
[''Another long lip-flapping pause.'']<br />
<br />
So at this point, with my spacing myself away from the Internet, and I'm trying to put my name back at a [[Chris and English|clean state]], I p- I so- I put this unto everybody, and all people who look me up on the Internet. Do ''not'' believe ANYTHING... that- that's at all about me. Because I pretty much did away with my website, the CWCipedia...So do not believe anything that there is on the Internet about me. If you want clarification, send, uh, me an e-mail, or talk to me in person. [[Chris and rape|I ''encourage'' talking to me in person.]] 'Cause then we can meet- 'cause then it will be face to face. And there is no better way of reflecting my [[Honest content|honesty]] to you, the general public, than face to face. ...I want to go back to [[PS3|a normal life]]. And one way I could do that, to help go back to do that, is to quell the bad reputation. So again, I encourage everybody who looks me up on the Internet, since there's nothing- since I have removed most everything about myself personally... don't believe anything on the Internet about me at this point. Don't believe anything on the Internet about me! <br />
<br />
Christian Weston Chandler, [[Ruckersville, Virginia]], [[America|United States of America]]. I leave y'all with that, and I bid y'all... a good day or evening depending on the time zone.<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2189]]|nextlink=[[EXCLUSIVE Manchester High School 2000 Reunion Required NOW]]}}<br />
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Christian_Weston_Chandler&diff=121105Christian Weston Chandler2010-10-21T22:48:23Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>''This article is about Christian Weston Chandler, the Internet's favorite autistic manchild. For all other uses please visit [[Christian Weston Chandler (disambiguation)]]''<br />
<br />
{{Quote|"Abandon all hope, ye who enter here."|[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dante_Alighieri Dante Alighieri's] [http://en.wikisource.org/wiki/The_Divine_Comedy/Inferno/Canto_III ''Inferno'', canto III, verse IX]}}<br />
<br />
{{Honest}}<br />
{| class="infobox" style="width: 21em; font-size: 90%;"<br />
|-<br />
! colspan="2" | Chandler family<br />
|-<br />
| colspan="2" | [[Image:0782-CWCSpread.JPG|300px]]<br />
|-<br />
! colspan="2" |Christian Weston Chandler<br />
|-<br />
| '''Birth name'''<br />
| Christopher Weston Chandler<br />
|-<br />
| '''Nicknames'''<br />
| Chris-Chan<br />
Ricardo Weston Chandler<br />
<br />
CWC<br />
<br />
Ian Brandon Anderson<br />
<br />
Solid Chris<br />
<br />
Chrissy<br />
<br />
''[[Homos|Homo]] virginicus''<br />
|-<br />
| '''Date of birth'''<br />
| 24 February [[1982]]<br />
|-<br />
| '''Gender'''<br />
| Male<br />
|-<br />
| '''Nationality'''<br />
| [[United States of America|American]]<br />
|-<br />
| '''Race'''<br />
| [[Chris and race|White]]<br />
|-<br />
| '''Height'''<br />
| 5'10" (1.78 m)<br />
|-<br />
| '''Weight'''<br />
| estimated at about 300 lbs (136 kg)<br />
|-<br />
| '''Parents'''<br />
| [[Bob]]<br /> [[Barbara]]<br />
|-<br />
| '''Education'''<br />
| [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] ([[CADD]])<br />
|-<br />
| '''Occupation(s)'''<br />
| Welfare leech<br />
<br />
Making [[fail|failtastic]] [[Sonichu]] comics<br />
|-<br />
|}<br />
<br />
'''Christian Weston Chandler''' (''né'' '''Christopher Weston Chandler''' on 24 February [[1982]]), is a [[Chris and Rape|perverse]], [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|disgusting]], [[Chris and the law|quarrelsome]], [[Chris and anger|mean-spirited]], [[Death threats|spiteful]], [[Chris and his Ego|narcissistic]], [[homos|homophobic]], [[Chris and sex|sexist]], [[niggos|racist]], [[Chris and health|overweight]], [[Chris and reality|delusional]], [[Chris and hypocrisy|hypocritical]], [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 6|stubborn]], [[Chris and religion|heretical]], [[art|completely]] and [[writing|utterly]] [[music|untalented]] "[[autism|high-functioning autistic]]" [[virgin with rage|virgin]] man-child, and [[Things Chris has ripped off|creator]] of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]], a [[fail|brilliant]] crossover of [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] and [[Pikachu]] - sorry, [[Chris and copyright|original creation]] - starring in his own self-titled [[Sonichu (comic)|online comic book]].<br />
<br />
His adult life has been largely defined by his goal of developing his webcomic ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' into a hit videogame franchise and his [[Love Quest]] to obtain a "[[boyfriend-free girl|boyfriend-free]], 18-[''my current age'']-year old, caring, [[tobacky|smoke-free]], [[alcohol|non-alcoholic]] [[Racism|white]] girl" to make into a "[[sweetheart from the Ground-Up|sweetheart from the ground-up]]." <br />
<br />
In late [[2007]], he became [[Internet]]-famous when he caught the attention of [[4chan]] and [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]. The initial fascination was spurred on by his willingness to wear a homemade [[Sonichu medallion]] in public, his laughably [[Chris and Art|childlike artwork]] about his unoriginal Sonic recolor, and his history of loitering in [[Attraction Locations|public places]] while literally holding up a [[sign]] asking women to talk to him. His reaction to the ensuing mockery led to even greater scrutiny of his life, revealing still more disturbing facts about him. <br />
<br />
Yes, friends, it gets far worse. <br />
<br />
==Aliases==<br />
[[Image:093-CWCtoon.jpg|thumb|left|100px|ORIGINAL IDENTITY. <br>DO NOT [[Liquid Chris|STEAL]]]]<br />
Much like the devil, Christian Weston Chandler goes by many names. He was born Christopher Weston Chandler, but [[Christopher's name change|changed]] to "Christian" at the behest of the "[[Leonard Bearstein|bear conductor]]." In either case, he answers to "Chris" and "Chris-Chan." Unusually, Chris will often refer to himself by his full name, or for even greater accuracy "Christopher Christian Weston Chandler." He is unusually proud of his initials "CWC" and often incorporates them into his creations and various puns on the word "quick."<br />
<br />
Chris's nickname in his high school [[Spanish]] classes was "Ricardo," and to this day he translates his own name to "Ricardo Weston Chandler" when writing or speaking in Spanish. At times he will literally announce himself as "Christopher' Christian 'Ricardo' Weston Chandler," or variants thereof, to precisely identify himself.<br />
<br />
He occasionally uses the names of his characters, most notably his evil twin, [[Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc]] and of course [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]]. In his comics, Chris has the ability to transform into a superheroic hedgehog himself, named [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]].<br />
<br />
The only names commonly used to refer to Chris which he did not himself invent are "Chrissy" (popularized by [[Arjen Van Dierten]]) and [[Ian Brandon Anderson]] (popularized by [[Liquid Chris]]). Less notably, there is also the seldom-used "Solid Chris", used by some to differentiate him from Liquid in the tradition of a [[Metal Gear Solid|certain video game series]].<br />
{{-}}<br />
==Overview==<br />
<br />
[[Image:CWCBitchesDunno.jpg|thumb|It's all right Chris, we already know since you annoy us to death about it]]<br />
<br />
Chris is a timid, [[chris_and_his_ego|self-absorbed]] little man who has been allowed—by [[Bob Chandler|his]] [[Barb|parents]] and/or his [[autism]]—to eternally live like a child, amassing [[toys]] and [[video games]] into a single bedroom in his parents' [[14 Branchland Court|house]]. Now approaching thirty, he is so comfortable in his pitiful existence that he refuses to conform to the rules of society, such as "you have to bathe regularly" and "you can't sit in a store all day waiting for people to talk to you" and "if you keep [[dirty crapped briefs|shitting your pants]] you should be more careful when you think you're just going to fart." Although the public school system forced society and Chris to put up with one another, Chris is now free to stay indoors and not do anything he doesn't want to do. Accordingly, Chris has never held a steady [[Chris's resume|job]] or had any meaningful relationship with a woman (or anyone of any gender, for that matter). <br />
<br />
Chris is obsessed with his character [[Sonichu]], to the point that he hand-crafted several [[medallions]] in the shape of Sonichu and related characters. Between February [[2004]] and [[March 2010]], Chris was rarely seen or photographed without one of these totems, even wearing them in his [[:Image:License.jpg|driver's license photo]] and to his [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|college]] graduation. He is absolutely convinced that everyone wants to learn all about Sonichu, and that the only reason [[Nintendo]], Sega, and [[Sony]] haven't approached him about making Sonichu games is that they're either trying to be tough negotiators, or that his chances are being ruined by [[trolls]] working in the companies. The medallion returned in [[September 2010]].<br />
<br />
[[Image:Chris-Straw.jpg|thumb|left|Why do I get the feeling he wants to suck a [[duck]]?]]<br />
<br />
[[Chris and art|Chris cannot draw. At all.]] Every single person on the planet could draw better at age seven than Chris could at age 23, when the hand-drawn [[Sonichu 0|premiere issue]] of ''Sonichu'' was released. What makes it even funnier is that his art is the closest thing he has to an actual talent.<br />
<br />
Chris is the dangerous combination of the emotional maturity of a six-year-old and the [[Chris and sex|sexual]] maturity of a young adult male. As a result, he has little understanding or appreciation of women. To him, all women are little more than objects that could potentially provide for him emotionally, sexually, and financially. It appears that everything he knows about sex has been learned from sex ed classes and porn. For some reason, he believes he knows more about sex and women than whoever he is talking to (such as women who have had sex), which inevitably results in hilarity.<br />
<br />
Chris absolutely hates [[homos|gay men]], and communicates this with such intensity that observers are easily convinced he's simply terrified of becoming gay himself. He cannot bear to look at another man's [[pickle|penis]], and he stares at [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon]] to keep himself straight. Oh, he also [[recycling|swallows his own semen]] and [[Sports bra photo series|wears a bra]]. Surprisingly, however, his homophobia seems to have little basis in his religious beliefs, as he had not noticed Leviticus 18:22, which condemns homosexuality, until he saw it on a 2009 episode of ''[[Family Guy]]''.<br />
{{clear}}<br />
<br />
== Early life ==<br />
<br />
===Childhood and adolescence===<br />
[[Image:Lapse.gif|left]]<br />
[[Image:0147-CWCsMilkcapsAcrossTime.jpg|240px|thumb|Evolution (or decay, depending upon how you see things) of a Chris-chan...in [[Wikipedia:Pogs|POG]] form (yes, those are homemade POGS). Top: Chris '94, '95, '96. Bottom: '97, '98', '99]]<br />
<br />
Chris claims his first word, "[[Fail|monkey]]," was spoken at six weeks old,<ref name="Wikipedia early">[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile#His Early Years - Birth to 1992]]</ref> and he remains proud of this feat well into his twenties regardless of how obviously unlikely it is to be true.<br />
<br />
An [[abusive babysitter]], who was alone with Christopher every day for years,<ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-3.PNG|6 March 2007 email from Cole to Chris, page 3]]</ref> allegedly locked him in a room at an early age.<ref name="Wikipedia early" /> Chris apparently misses the irony in the fact the he now locks himself in a [[Chris's room|room]]. He once identified this confinement as the source of his autism. Between the ages of one and seven, Chris did not speak at all, and had to visit [[James Madison University]] for speech therapy.<br />
<br />
During the [[1980s]], Christopher was playmates with [[Sarah Hammer]]. One day, she convinced him that [[Wikipedia:Casper the Friendly Ghost|Casper the Friendly Ghost]] lived in the crawlspace under her house, and when he crawled in there to look, she locked him in,<ref>[[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares#Memories of childhood|Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares, page 4]]</ref> beginning Chris's lifelong career of getting trolled. Apparently, he doesn't hold any hard feelings over it (possibly just because she's a girl — if a guy did that to him, Chris would vow vengeance.)<br />
<br />
In [[1989]], noted furry conductor Leonard Bearstein misheard Christopher's first name and called him "Christian," which convinced Christopher to later have his name [[Christopher's name change|legally changed]].<br />
<br />
Chris spent the [[1990s|1990-1991]] school year in the fourth grade at [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]], until his parents pulled him out of classes over a mysterious dispute. Chris claims that he was forcefully restrained by the school's faculty<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007]]</ref> and that he was made to sit on the lap of the [[Bruce Johnson|principal]], an experience that supposedly inspired his homophobia. It's possible that Chris's opinions about these events are colored more by his parents' attitudes than his own memories. The issue went to court, with Greene County seeking to have Chris sent to a "special school." Chris was home-schooled through the fifth grade during these proceedings. When his family exhausted all legal recourse, Chris and his father relocated to [[Richmond]] so that Chris could continue his education in a different school system, starting with the sixth grade in fall 1992.<ref name="Wikipedia early" /><br />
<br />
At age 11, Chris entered and won the [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes]]. On his twelfth birthday, he enjoyed a $1,000 shopping spree at [[Wikipedia:KB Toys|Kay Bee Toys]] as his prize. Local news coverage of the event focused on Chris's autism, regarding the contest win as a more worthy accomplishment due to his mental condition. Chris put footage from this newscast on [[YouTube]] long before he was known to general public, and it remains the most solid evidence that he is not [[IBAChandler|some elaborate troll]].<br />
<br />
This incident is often cited as the beginning of Chris's tendency to leverage his autism for special treatment, as well as his fascination with toys and video games at the expense of more mature pursuits. It has led Chris to constantly enter contests in hopes of winning big (or else [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|becoming infuriated]] when he loses).<br />
<br />
<center><gallery><br />
Image:0002-BabyChristopher.jpg|Even as a baby, he was unusually ugly. Looks kind of like Baby Selwyn from ''[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Braindead_%28film%29 Braindead]''.<br />
Image:0003-ChristopherApr1985.jpg|Age 3, actually a pretty cute kid.<br />
Image:0001-ChristopherInSchool.jpg|Holding a prototype [[Sonichu Balls|Sonichu ball]].<br />
Image:0043-YoungChristopher2.jpg|[[Chris and fashion|Chris's taste in clown shirts begins]], coupled with his infamous "deer in headlights" [[The Creepy Stare|stare]].<br />
</gallery></center><br />
<br />
{{collapsible<br />
|More of young Christian<br />
|<gallery><br />
Image:0005-ChristopherWBigShirt.jpg<br />
Image:0006-Christopher6-1986.jpg<br />
Image:0007-Christopher12-1986.jpg<br />
Image:0010-ChristopherChristmas1.jpg<br />
Image:0013-ChristopherWFivel.jpg<br />
Image:0015-ChristopherWPillow.jpg<br />
Image:0016-ChristopherByTV.jpg<br />
Image:0017-Christopher'sFavoriteChair.jpg<br />
Image:0018-ChristopherWRootBeer1.jpg<br />
Image:0019-ChristopherWRootBeer2.jpg<br />
Image:0020-ChristopherWCar1.jpg<br />
Image:0021-ChristopherWCar2.jpg<br />
Image:0022-ChristopherWithWhat1.jpg<br />
Image:0023-ChristopherWithWhat2.jpg<br />
Image:0024-ChristopherTurns5.jpg<br />
Image:0030-ChristopherWSunglasses.jpg<br />
Image:0031-1-Chris on Pony.jpg<br />
Image:0035-ChritopherArmPaint.jpg<br />
Image:0044-YoungChristopher1.jpg<br />
Image:0047-ChristopherApr1991.jpg<br />
Image:0048-1-Sad Chris.jpg<br />
Image:0048-ChristopherSept1991.jpg<br />
Image:0049-ChristopherFacePaint.jpg<br />
Image:0059-ChristopherWBat.jpg<br />
Image:0072-Chrisian&Santa.jpg<br />
Image:0076-ChristianWTrain.jpg<br />
Image:0086-Christmas95-1.jpg<br />
Image:0087-Christmas95-2.jpg<br />
Image:0088-Christmas95-3.jpg<br />
<br />
</gallery>}}<br />
<br />
[[Image:0240-ChristianCBBall97.jpg|120px|thumb|left|CWC the water boy. PRO TIP: Don't drink anything from one of Chris's [[fapcup|cups]]]]<br />
<br />
[[Image:CWC12.png|120px|thumb|Hard to believe, but this photo has not been airbrushed to perfection]]<br />
<br />
Chris spent much of his time in [[Manchester High School|high school]] playing video games at home, reading R.L. Stine horror novels, and hanging out with his "[[gal pals]]" and "[[Joseph Herring|friend]]" at school. It was at this time that he first put his "creative talents" to use, with the inventions of [[Bionic the Hedgehog]] and [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]].<ref>[[Sonichu 7]], [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/sonichu/SchuComic8P12.htm page 22]</ref> Chris was on the [[honor roll]] and acquired the true source of his powers, his [[high school ring]].<br />
<br />
Because the art award he wanted was given to someone else, Chris cried like a little bitch during his [[Manchester High School#Graduation|high-school graduation]]. He honestly thought he deserved the award more than anyone else because he worked on it ''so hard'' in spite of his autism. Another reason for his sorrow was his fear that he might soon have to grow up and start acting like an adult.<ref>[[:Image:0567-GraduationNote2.jpg|DVD, graduation note 2]]</ref><br />
<br />
Since leaving high school and the happiest years of his life, Chris has been unable to progress in any aspect of his life. He remains trapped in a childish, Year [[2000]] [[Time Void|time-warp]], as he believes that whatever he was doing at the time was what helped him attract female companions. That his high-school gal-pals have moved on and married real adult men with careers is of little consequence to him.<br />
<br />
{{collapsible<br />
|Chris's (non)award winning art work<br />
|<gallery perrow="5"><br />
<br />
Image:444-MecheFox.JPG|This should win a prize.<br />
Image:445-SonicTotem.JPG|Not creepy.<br />
Image:470-CWCCoilPot.JPG|Chris's Like Like.<br />
Image:475-RelaxingCWC1.JPG|Chris relaxing. Not scary at all.<br />
Image:476-RelaxingCWC2.JPG|Uh...<br />
Image:471-ChristophersLeatherFace.JPG|Chris calls this his "leather face." Apparently, he's never seen ''Texas Chainsaw Massacre.''<br />
Image:467-CWCPlate.JPG|This plate helps you lose weight - look at it and you'll want to vomit.<br />
Image:doorfish.jpg|You put this over your door to keep away would be thieves.]]<br />
</gallery>}}<br />
<br />
{{clear}}<br />
<br />
===Adult adventures===<br />
<br />
{{Quote|"It is certain, that even the most ignorant and stupid peasants, nay infants, nay even brute beasts, improve by experience.|[[Wikipedia:David Hume|David Hume]], [[Love_quest|having never met Chris]]}}<br />
<br />
[[Image:0781-CWCspdbed.JPG|thumb|One of Chris's promotional images for his [[Love Quest]]. Many women have gouged their eyes out after seeing it.]]<br />
<br />
Chris's entry into [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] probably eased his inability to cope with life after high school. He took courses in [[CADD|Computer Aided Drafting and Design]] and began spending more time on Sonichu, launching a [[Sonichu's News Dash|retarded newsletter]] and circulating it on the PVCC campus. Over time, he began losing touch with his gal-pals from high school, and he presumably found the junior college crowd less willing to humor him and his bullshit.<br />
<br />
Chris says he decided he needed a [[sweetheart]] in February [[2003]]. Possibly driven by his discovery that his old friend [[Sarah Hammer]] had begun dating [[Wes Iseli]], Chris started his [[Love Quest]] in earnest that summer. However, he quickly found that every girl he talked to had a boyfriend… allegedly. Chris soon became neurotic about the "[[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor]]" and began employing various bizarre methods to attract women without actually having to approach them or speak to them.<br />
<br />
Chris's most celebrated technique involved sitting in one place (or pacing back and forth) for hours, holding a [[sign]] that read "I am a (my age then)-Year Old, Single Male, seeking an 18-(my age then)-Year Old, Single Female Companion." Amazingly, this strategy accomplished nothing beyond getting him into trouble with various [[jerkops|authority]] [[manajerks|figures]] who believed that he was loitering and/or soliciting sex. Chris was particularly traumatized by a series of confrontations with the [[PVCC]] dean [[Mary Lee Walsh]] over his attraction techniques, resulting in an ongoing, completely one-sided blood feud.<br />
<br />
After a series of confrontations featuring increasingly bizarre and threatening behavior on Chris's part, Walsh expelled him for one year in [[2004]]. He eventually returned, however, obtaining an associate's degree in May [[2006]].<br />
<br />
[[Image:156-CWCMegan1.jpg|thumb|left|He can smell fear]]<br />
<br />
After college, Chris promptly dropped out of society, devoting his life to finding a [[boyfriend-free girl]], drawing ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'', [[masturbation|masturbating]] and using his [[monthly tugboat|welfare money]] to buy video games and [[sex toys]].<br />
<br />
In [[2005]], Chris met [[Megan Schroeder]] at a local game and card shop. Megan proved unusual in that she was willing to talk to Chris for more than five minutes. The two quickly became close friends, although Megan claimed to have recently endured a bad break-up and refused to entertain Chris's obvious romantic interest. Chris, being totally smooth with women due to countless hours of studying them in porn and [[anime]], believed that the key to turning Megan's platonic feelings romantic was to make inappropriate advances toward her until she had to tell him to stop touching her.<br />
<br />
In the summer of [[2007]], Chris put it all on the line by entering the [[PaRappa the Rapper Contest]] so that he could win prizes and a trip for two to Seattle, which formed the centerpiece of his plan to finally score with Megan. The contest ended in disaster for Chris, as he lost to the dreaded [[Adam Stackhouse]] and finally learned that Megan wouldn't have gone with him on the trip even if he had won.<br />
<br />
It was during the Love Quest that Chris was inspired to launch ''Sonichu'', a comic book series featuring his Electric-Hedgehog [[Pokémon]]. Ostensibly, the comic was intended to raise awareness of Chris's unbelievably original character, but within half an issue, the storylines began to revolve around the frankly more compelling saga of Chris's own personal issues. <br />
{{clear}}<br />
<br />
==Discovery==<br />
<br />
{{main|2007|2008}}<br />
[[Image:110-SchuSiteIdea2.jpg|thumb|FUCK YEAH]]<br />
<br />
Chris's rare talent was discovered when he posted an anonymous picture of Sonichu on [[4-cent garbage|4chan]]. It only took a quick Google search of Chris's name to discover the picture's author, and Chris's miserable existence spilled over onto [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] in October 2007. His life was never the same again.<br />
<br />
Upon learning of the "Chris-chan" article on ED, Chris released a single [[Chris Chan's Public Announcement|YouTube video]] attempting to diplomatically convince the site to remove the page. Failing in this, he then spent the next several months [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica|vandalizing]] the article in the vain hope of overwhelming his enemies. This catastrophically backfired as Chris, in an attempt to prove himself as lurid as the [[trolls]], revealed a great deal of embarrassing information, most notably [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|a portrait of himself fingerbanging Megan]] that ruined his most important relationship at the time. By the spring of [[2008]] Chris would be banned from both [[The Game Place|his favorite hangout]] and [[Grace Baptist Church|his parents' church]] for reasons at least partially related to information brought to light by the ED article.<br />
<br />
In August 2008 Chris [[CWC's Second Message|declared]] [[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)|war]] upon Encyclopedia Dramatica in a series of videos, threatening to withhold publication of the upcoming [[Sonichu 7]] unless his vast fan base rallied to force ED to remove the "Chris-chan" article. When ED suffered outages unrelated to this crusade, Chris [[Kudos to the Encyclopedia DramaDestruction|took credit and declared victory]], guaranteeing that he would be under constant fire from trolls for years to come. This began an endless cycle in which Chris would produce videos, comics, and harebrained schemes to attack the trolls, which would in turn encourage more and more trolls to provoke him for his hilarious responses. <br />
<br />
The cycle was briefly disrupted in the fall of 2008 when Chris sent his various [[medallions]] to his [[Blanca Weiss|fake internet girlfriend]], who immediately destroyed them and broke up with him. This emotional heartbreak and the release of ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]'' reduced Chris's output of videos and other sources of [[lulz]]. At the same time, Encyclopedia Dramatica began cracking down on trolls using Chris's ED page as a forum for discussing him, and in general opinion was divided as to whether it was lulzy or faggy to continue harassing him. The resulting schism led to the creation of numerous websites (such as [[CWCki|this one]] singularly devoted to trolling Chris), which only expanded coverage of Chris's hijinks.<br />
{{clear}}<br />
<br />
==Chris today== <br />
<br />
{{main|2008|2009|2010}}<br />
<br />
[[File:Ecp00066.jpg|thumb|Chris in [[2009]]]]<br />
<br />
By late 2008, trolls controlled many aspects of Chris's life by posing as dedicated [[fans]], cartoonish enemies, and prospective business partners. Chris's ego and [[naive]]te readily embraced this world in which every woman wanted to fuck him, and every man was either trying to help him sell Sonichu products or steal the franchise for their own nefarious goals. Trolls would begin denoting major events in Chris's life as "[[saga]]s" such as the [[Miyamoto]] Saga, the [[Julie]] Saga, the [[Ivy]] Saga, the [[Liquid Chris|Liquid]] Saga, and the [[Asperchu]] Saga. All the while, the [[CWCki]] maintains a constant record of these events, ensuring that Chris cannot selectively ignore his own history.<br />
<br />
[[File:Personalprofile.jpg|thumb|left|[[OkCupid|Hello]] [[The Hook Cafe|ladies]]!]]<br />
<br />
Following his disastrous failure to woo [[The Wallflower|a real girl]] in March [[2010]], Chris began to realize what anyone else would have figured out a long time ago: his toxic [[internet]] presence is having a detrimental effect upon his real life, and each new video he creates only makes it worse. This appears to be connected to a reduction in his online presence, and the disappearance of his [[medallion]] and his [[Chris and fashion|striped shirts]]. Of late Chris has become paranoid and has grown more suspicious of anyone online, imploring everyone to meet him in person if they ''really'' want to get to know him. Of course, Chris has [[List of Chris's Lies|a penchant for lying]], so talking to him in real life is as pointless as talking to him online.<br />
<br />
Chris's desire to avoid being fooled has not made him any better at doing it, and the smart money was that sooner or later he'll fall for some "girl" that asks him to [[BlueSpike|shove stuff up his ass]]. No matter how hard Chris tries to avoid the trolling, he will always inexplicably find someone to troll him.<br />
<br />
Today Chris continues to live with his parents, living off the [[monthly tugboat|money]] he receives from the federal government as compensation for his autism, which allegedly renders him incapable of contributing to society. Since he has no job and is usually banned from any place he visits for more than thirty minutes, Chris has few social outlets and has grown increasingly withdrawn. In his desperate need for attention, he repeatedly returns to the trolls, unwittingly proving that the only people who will put up with him are those who just want him to do something stupid for them to laugh at.<br />
<br />
==Featured fan videos==<br />
<br />
{{collapsible<br />
|The videos about the life and times of Christian Weston Chandler<br />
|<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = The End of Chris-Chan <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|lddgCHYKSG4}}<br />
| Stardate = 2 April 2009<br />
| Maker = [[Vivian Gee]]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = The Rebirth of Chris-Chan <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|HSTicQs4Ke8}}<br />
| Stardate = 12 April 2009<br />
| Maker = [[Vivian Gee]]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = Chris-chan is Pitiful <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|gsbzB26sQwk}}<br />
| Stardate = 2 August 2009<br />
| Maker = CreepyMcCreep<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = Resident Chris-chan 3: Dating Ground <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|8rRi90wfvHI}}<br />
| Stardate = 1 October 2009<br />
| Maker = MewLine<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = Part 3 of the series<br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = IICHH-TIPM - the 503 faces of Chris-Chan<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|YHfZ9XCMUQQ }}<br />
| Stardate = 13 October 2009<br />
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/tehcosmicexplorer08 tehcosmicexplorer08]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = CWC a sad story<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|DxAhBoYfWy4}}<br />
| Stardate = 20 November 2009<br />
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/IBAClydeCash IBAClydeCash]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = 'My Name Is Christian Weston Chandler' Theatrical Trailer <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|TQfvFw1GMXA}}<br />
| Stardate = 8 December 2009<br />
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/wtfdavemustaine wtfdavemustaine]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = CWC's Show Must Go On<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|HZqqFUeoaEg }}<br />
| Stardate = 12 December 2009<br />
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/Secretevilguy Secretevilguy]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = Cwcville Show <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|rDyg8bxeyTM}}<br />
| Stardate = 23 December 2009<br />
| Maker = BigBlackPony<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = When Chris-Chan's Gone <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|DE2OOsKrvoU}}<br />
| Stardate = 3 January 2010<br />
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/tehcosmicexplorer08 tehcosmicexplorer08]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
* [[Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)]], Chris's depiction of himself within his own comics.<br />
* [[Chris-chan Sonichu]], Chris's furry alter ego.<br />
* [[:Category:DVD slideshow images|Hundreds of personal photographs]] assembled for use in Chris's autobiographical [[DVD]].<br />
* [[User:GodofThunderGodofWar]], Chris's own CWCki account!<br />
<br />
==References==<br />
<br />
{{CWCipedia}}<br />
{{Fan Art|chris=Chris-Chan (fanart)|linkname=Chris}}<br />
<br />
<references /><br />
<br />
{{Chris and}}<br />
{{People}}<br />
{{Timeline}}<br />
<br />
{{DEFAULTSORT:Chandler, Christian Weston}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Chris-chan]]<br />
[[Category:Family Members]]<br />
[[Category:Real people who have appeared in Sonichu comics]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Christian_Weston_Chandler&diff=121104Christian Weston Chandler2010-10-21T22:45:12Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>''This article is about Christian Weston Chandler, the Internet's favorite autistic manchild. For all other uses please visit [[Christian Weston Chandler (disambiguation)]]''<br />
<br />
{{Quote|"Abandon all hope, ye who enter here."|[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dante_Alighieri Dante Alighieri's] [http://en.wikisource.org/wiki/The_Divine_Comedy/Inferno/Canto_III ''Inferno'', canto III, verse IX]}}<br />
<br />
{{Honest}}<br />
{| class="infobox" style="width: 21em; font-size: 90%;"<br />
|-<br />
! colspan="2" | Chandler family<br />
|-<br />
| colspan="2" | [[Image:0782-CWCSpread.JPG|300px]]<br />
|-<br />
! colspan="2" |Christian Weston Chandler<br />
|-<br />
| '''Birth name'''<br />
| Christopher Weston Chandler<br />
|-<br />
| '''Nicknames'''<br />
| Chris-Chan<br />
Ricardo Weston Chandler<br />
<br />
CWC<br />
<br />
Ian Brandon Anderson<br />
<br />
Solid Chris<br />
<br />
Chrissy<br />
|-<br />
| '''Date of birth'''<br />
| 24 February [[1982]]<br />
|-<br />
| '''Gender'''<br />
| Male<br />
|-<br />
| '''Nationality'''<br />
| [[United States of America|American]]<br />
|-<br />
| '''Race'''<br />
| [[Chris and race|White]]<br />
|-<br />
| '''Height'''<br />
| 5'10" (1.78 m)<br />
|-<br />
| '''Weight'''<br />
| estimated at about 300 lbs (136 kg)<br />
|-<br />
| '''Parents'''<br />
| [[Bob]]<br /> [[Barbara]]<br />
|-<br />
| '''Education'''<br />
| [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] ([[CADD]])<br />
|-<br />
| '''Occupation(s)'''<br />
| Welfare leech<br />
<br />
Making [[fail|failtastic]] [[Sonichu]] comics<br />
|-<br />
|}<br />
<br />
'''Christian Weston Chandler''' (''né'' '''Christopher Weston Chandler''' on 24 February [[1982]]), also known by his scientific name, ''[[Homos|Homo]] virginicus'', is a [[Chris and Rape|perverse]], [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|disgusting]], [[Chris and the law|quarrelsome]], [[Chris and anger|mean-spirited]], [[Death threats|spiteful]], [[Chris and his Ego|narcissistic]], [[homos|homophobic]], [[Chris and sex|sexist]], [[niggos|racist]], [[Chris and health|overweight]], [[Chris and reality|delusional]], [[Chris and hypocrisy|hypocritical]], [[Alec Benson Leary Phone Call 6|stubborn]], [[Chris and religion|heretical]], [[art|completely]] and [[writing|utterly]] [[music|untalented]] "[[autism|high-functioning autistic]]" [[virgin with rage|virgin]] man-child, and [[Things Chris has ripped off|creator]] of [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]], a [[fail|brilliant]] crossover of [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] and [[Pikachu]] - sorry, [[Chris and copyright|original creation]] - starring in his own self-titled [[Sonichu (comic)|online comic book]].<br />
<br />
His adult life has been largely defined by his goal of developing his webcomic ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'' into a hit videogame franchise and his [[Love Quest]] to obtain a "[[boyfriend-free girl|boyfriend-free]], 18-[''my current age'']-year old, caring, [[tobacky|smoke-free]], [[alcohol|non-alcoholic]] [[Racism|white]] girl" to make into a "[[sweetheart from the Ground-Up|sweetheart from the ground-up]]." <br />
<br />
In late [[2007]], he became [[Internet]]-famous when he caught the attention of [[4chan]] and [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]. The initial fascination was spurred on by his willingness to wear a homemade [[Sonichu medallion]] in public, his laughably [[Chris and Art|childlike artwork]] about his unoriginal Sonic recolor, and his history of loitering in [[Attraction Locations|public places]] while literally holding up a [[sign]] asking women to talk to him. His reaction to the ensuing mockery led to even greater scrutiny of his life, revealing still more disturbing facts about him. <br />
<br />
Yes, friends, it gets far worse. <br />
<br />
==Aliases==<br />
[[Image:093-CWCtoon.jpg|thumb|left|100px|ORIGINAL IDENTITY. <br>DO NOT [[Liquid Chris|STEAL]]]]<br />
Much like the devil, Christian Weston Chandler goes by many names. He was born Christopher Weston Chandler, but [[Christopher's name change|changed]] to "Christian" at the behest of the "[[Leonard Bearstein|bear conductor]]." In either case, he answers to "Chris" and "Chris-Chan." Unusually, Chris will often refer to himself by his full name, or for even greater accuracy "Christopher Christian Weston Chandler." He is unusually proud of his initials "CWC" and often incorporates them into his creations and various puns on the word "quick."<br />
<br />
Chris's nickname in his high school [[Spanish]] classes was "Ricardo," and to this day he translates his own name to "Ricardo Weston Chandler" when writing or speaking in Spanish. At times he will literally announce himself as "Christopher' Christian 'Ricardo' Weston Chandler," or variants thereof, to precisely identify himself.<br />
<br />
He occasionally uses the names of his characters, most notably his evil twin, [[Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc]] and of course [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]]. In his comics, Chris has the ability to transform into a superheroic hedgehog himself, named [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]].<br />
<br />
The only names commonly used to refer to Chris which he did not himself invent are "Chrissy" (popularized by [[Arjen Van Dierten]]) and [[Ian Brandon Anderson]] (popularized by [[Liquid Chris]]). Less notably, there is also the seldom-used "Solid Chris", used by some to differentiate him from Liquid in the tradition of a [[Metal Gear Solid|certain video game series]].<br />
{{-}}<br />
==Overview==<br />
<br />
[[Image:CWCBitchesDunno.jpg|thumb|It's all right Chris, we already know since you annoy us to death about it]]<br />
<br />
Chris is a timid, [[chris_and_his_ego|self-absorbed]] little man who has been allowed—by [[Bob Chandler|his]] [[Barb|parents]] and/or his [[autism]]—to eternally live like a child, amassing [[toys]] and [[video games]] into a single bedroom in his parents' [[14 Branchland Court|house]]. Now approaching thirty, he is so comfortable in his pitiful existence that he refuses to conform to the rules of society, such as "you have to bathe regularly" and "you can't sit in a store all day waiting for people to talk to you" and "if you keep [[dirty crapped briefs|shitting your pants]] you should be more careful when you think you're just going to fart." Although the public school system forced society and Chris to put up with one another, Chris is now free to stay indoors and not do anything he doesn't want to do. Accordingly, Chris has never held a steady [[Chris's resume|job]] or had any meaningful relationship with a woman (or anyone of any gender, for that matter). <br />
<br />
Chris is obsessed with his character [[Sonichu]], to the point that he hand-crafted several [[medallions]] in the shape of Sonichu and related characters. Between February [[2004]] and [[March 2010]], Chris was rarely seen or photographed without one of these totems, even wearing them in his [[:Image:License.jpg|driver's license photo]] and to his [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|college]] graduation. He is absolutely convinced that everyone wants to learn all about Sonichu, and that the only reason [[Nintendo]], Sega, and [[Sony]] haven't approached him about making Sonichu games is that they're either trying to be tough negotiators, or that his chances are being ruined by [[trolls]] working in the companies. The medallion returned in [[September 2010]].<br />
<br />
[[Image:Chris-Straw.jpg|thumb|left|Why do I get the feeling he wants to suck a [[duck]]?]]<br />
<br />
[[Chris and art|Chris cannot draw. At all.]] Every single person on the planet could draw better at age seven than Chris could at age 23, when the hand-drawn [[Sonichu 0|premiere issue]] of ''Sonichu'' was released. What makes it even funnier is that his art is the closest thing he has to an actual talent.<br />
<br />
Chris is the dangerous combination of the emotional maturity of a six-year-old and the [[Chris and sex|sexual]] maturity of a young adult male. As a result, he has little understanding or appreciation of women. To him, all women are little more than objects that could potentially provide for him emotionally, sexually, and financially. It appears that everything he knows about sex has been learned from sex ed classes and porn. For some reason, he believes he knows more about sex and women than whoever he is talking to (such as women who have had sex), which inevitably results in hilarity.<br />
<br />
Chris absolutely hates [[homos|gay men]], and communicates this with such intensity that observers are easily convinced he's simply terrified of becoming gay himself. He cannot bear to look at another man's [[pickle|penis]], and he stares at [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon]] to keep himself straight. Oh, he also [[recycling|swallows his own semen]] and [[Sports bra photo series|wears a bra]]. Surprisingly, however, his homophobia seems to have little basis in his religious beliefs, as he had not noticed Leviticus 18:22, which condemns homosexuality, until he saw it on a 2009 episode of ''[[Family Guy]]''.<br />
{{clear}}<br />
<br />
== Early life ==<br />
<br />
===Childhood and adolescence===<br />
[[Image:Lapse.gif|left]]<br />
[[Image:0147-CWCsMilkcapsAcrossTime.jpg|240px|thumb|Evolution (or decay, depending upon how you see things) of a Chris-chan...in [[Wikipedia:Pogs|POG]] form (yes, those are homemade POGS). Top: Chris '94, '95, '96. Bottom: '97, '98', '99]]<br />
<br />
Chris claims his first word, "[[Fail|monkey]]," was spoken at six weeks old,<ref name="Wikipedia early">[[User:ChrisChanSonichu profile#His Early Years - Birth to 1992]]</ref> and he remains proud of this feat well into his twenties regardless of how obviously unlikely it is to be true.<br />
<br />
An [[abusive babysitter]], who was alone with Christopher every day for years,<ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-03-06-3.PNG|6 March 2007 email from Cole to Chris, page 3]]</ref> allegedly locked him in a room at an early age.<ref name="Wikipedia early" /> Chris apparently misses the irony in the fact the he now locks himself in a [[Chris's room|room]]. He once identified this confinement as the source of his autism. Between the ages of one and seven, Chris did not speak at all, and had to visit [[James Madison University]] for speech therapy.<br />
<br />
During the [[1980s]], Christopher was playmates with [[Sarah Hammer]]. One day, she convinced him that [[Wikipedia:Casper the Friendly Ghost|Casper the Friendly Ghost]] lived in the crawlspace under her house, and when he crawled in there to look, she locked him in,<ref>[[Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares#Memories of childhood|Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares, page 4]]</ref> beginning Chris's lifelong career of getting trolled. Apparently, he doesn't hold any hard feelings over it (possibly just because she's a girl — if a guy did that to him, Chris would vow vengeance.)<br />
<br />
In [[1989]], noted furry conductor Leonard Bearstein misheard Christopher's first name and called him "Christian," which convinced Christopher to later have his name [[Christopher's name change|legally changed]].<br />
<br />
Chris spent the [[1990s|1990-1991]] school year in the fourth grade at [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School]], until his parents pulled him out of classes over a mysterious dispute. Chris claims that he was forcefully restrained by the school's faculty<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007]]</ref> and that he was made to sit on the lap of the [[Bruce Johnson|principal]], an experience that supposedly inspired his homophobia. It's possible that Chris's opinions about these events are colored more by his parents' attitudes than his own memories. The issue went to court, with Greene County seeking to have Chris sent to a "special school." Chris was home-schooled through the fifth grade during these proceedings. When his family exhausted all legal recourse, Chris and his father relocated to [[Richmond]] so that Chris could continue his education in a different school system, starting with the sixth grade in fall 1992.<ref name="Wikipedia early" /><br />
<br />
At age 11, Chris entered and won the [[Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes]]. On his twelfth birthday, he enjoyed a $1,000 shopping spree at [[Wikipedia:KB Toys|Kay Bee Toys]] as his prize. Local news coverage of the event focused on Chris's autism, regarding the contest win as a more worthy accomplishment due to his mental condition. Chris put footage from this newscast on [[YouTube]] long before he was known to general public, and it remains the most solid evidence that he is not [[IBAChandler|some elaborate troll]].<br />
<br />
This incident is often cited as the beginning of Chris's tendency to leverage his autism for special treatment, as well as his fascination with toys and video games at the expense of more mature pursuits. It has led Chris to constantly enter contests in hopes of winning big (or else [[Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown|becoming infuriated]] when he loses).<br />
<br />
<center><gallery><br />
Image:0002-BabyChristopher.jpg|Even as a baby, he was unusually ugly. Looks kind of like Baby Selwyn from ''[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Braindead_%28film%29 Braindead]''.<br />
Image:0003-ChristopherApr1985.jpg|Age 3, actually a pretty cute kid.<br />
Image:0001-ChristopherInSchool.jpg|Holding a prototype [[Sonichu Balls|Sonichu ball]].<br />
Image:0043-YoungChristopher2.jpg|[[Chris and fashion|Chris's taste in clown shirts begins]], coupled with his infamous "deer in headlights" [[The Creepy Stare|stare]].<br />
</gallery></center><br />
<br />
{{collapsible<br />
|More of young Christian<br />
|<gallery><br />
Image:0005-ChristopherWBigShirt.jpg<br />
Image:0006-Christopher6-1986.jpg<br />
Image:0007-Christopher12-1986.jpg<br />
Image:0010-ChristopherChristmas1.jpg<br />
Image:0013-ChristopherWFivel.jpg<br />
Image:0015-ChristopherWPillow.jpg<br />
Image:0016-ChristopherByTV.jpg<br />
Image:0017-Christopher'sFavoriteChair.jpg<br />
Image:0018-ChristopherWRootBeer1.jpg<br />
Image:0019-ChristopherWRootBeer2.jpg<br />
Image:0020-ChristopherWCar1.jpg<br />
Image:0021-ChristopherWCar2.jpg<br />
Image:0022-ChristopherWithWhat1.jpg<br />
Image:0023-ChristopherWithWhat2.jpg<br />
Image:0024-ChristopherTurns5.jpg<br />
Image:0030-ChristopherWSunglasses.jpg<br />
Image:0031-1-Chris on Pony.jpg<br />
Image:0035-ChritopherArmPaint.jpg<br />
Image:0044-YoungChristopher1.jpg<br />
Image:0047-ChristopherApr1991.jpg<br />
Image:0048-1-Sad Chris.jpg<br />
Image:0048-ChristopherSept1991.jpg<br />
Image:0049-ChristopherFacePaint.jpg<br />
Image:0059-ChristopherWBat.jpg<br />
Image:0072-Chrisian&Santa.jpg<br />
Image:0076-ChristianWTrain.jpg<br />
Image:0086-Christmas95-1.jpg<br />
Image:0087-Christmas95-2.jpg<br />
Image:0088-Christmas95-3.jpg<br />
<br />
</gallery>}}<br />
<br />
[[Image:0240-ChristianCBBall97.jpg|120px|thumb|left|CWC the water boy. PRO TIP: Don't drink anything from one of Chris's [[fapcup|cups]]]]<br />
<br />
[[Image:CWC12.png|120px|thumb|Hard to believe, but this photo has not been airbrushed to perfection]]<br />
<br />
Chris spent much of his time in [[Manchester High School|high school]] playing video games at home, reading R.L. Stine horror novels, and hanging out with his "[[gal pals]]" and "[[Joseph Herring|friend]]" at school. It was at this time that he first put his "creative talents" to use, with the inventions of [[Bionic the Hedgehog]] and [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]].<ref>[[Sonichu 7]], [http://cogsdev.110mb.com/sonichu/SchuComic8P12.htm page 22]</ref> Chris was on the [[honor roll]] and acquired the true source of his powers, his [[high school ring]].<br />
<br />
Because the art award he wanted was given to someone else, Chris cried like a little bitch during his [[Manchester High School#Graduation|high-school graduation]]. He honestly thought he deserved the award more than anyone else because he worked on it ''so hard'' in spite of his autism. Another reason for his sorrow was his fear that he might soon have to grow up and start acting like an adult.<ref>[[:Image:0567-GraduationNote2.jpg|DVD, graduation note 2]]</ref><br />
<br />
Since leaving high school and the happiest years of his life, Chris has been unable to progress in any aspect of his life. He remains trapped in a childish, Year [[2000]] [[Time Void|time-warp]], as he believes that whatever he was doing at the time was what helped him attract female companions. That his high-school gal-pals have moved on and married real adult men with careers is of little consequence to him.<br />
<br />
{{collapsible<br />
|Chris's (non)award winning art work<br />
|<gallery perrow="5"><br />
<br />
Image:444-MecheFox.JPG|This should win a prize.<br />
Image:445-SonicTotem.JPG|Not creepy.<br />
Image:470-CWCCoilPot.JPG|Chris's Like Like.<br />
Image:475-RelaxingCWC1.JPG|Chris relaxing. Not scary at all.<br />
Image:476-RelaxingCWC2.JPG|Uh...<br />
Image:471-ChristophersLeatherFace.JPG|Chris calls this his "leather face." Apparently, he's never seen ''Texas Chainsaw Massacre.''<br />
Image:467-CWCPlate.JPG|This plate helps you lose weight - look at it and you'll want to vomit.<br />
Image:doorfish.jpg|You put this over your door to keep away would be thieves.]]<br />
</gallery>}}<br />
<br />
{{clear}}<br />
<br />
===Adult adventures===<br />
<br />
{{Quote|"It is certain, that even the most ignorant and stupid peasants, nay infants, nay even brute beasts, improve by experience.|[[Wikipedia:David Hume|David Hume]], [[Love_quest|having never met Chris]]}}<br />
<br />
[[Image:0781-CWCspdbed.JPG|thumb|One of Chris's promotional images for his [[Love Quest]]. Many women have gouged their eyes out after seeing it.]]<br />
<br />
Chris's entry into [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] probably eased his inability to cope with life after high school. He took courses in [[CADD|Computer Aided Drafting and Design]] and began spending more time on Sonichu, launching a [[Sonichu's News Dash|retarded newsletter]] and circulating it on the PVCC campus. Over time, he began losing touch with his gal-pals from high school, and he presumably found the junior college crowd less willing to humor him and his bullshit.<br />
<br />
Chris says he decided he needed a [[sweetheart]] in February [[2003]]. Possibly driven by his discovery that his old friend [[Sarah Hammer]] had begun dating [[Wes Iseli]], Chris started his [[Love Quest]] in earnest that summer. However, he quickly found that every girl he talked to had a boyfriend… allegedly. Chris soon became neurotic about the "[[Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor]]" and began employing various bizarre methods to attract women without actually having to approach them or speak to them.<br />
<br />
Chris's most celebrated technique involved sitting in one place (or pacing back and forth) for hours, holding a [[sign]] that read "I am a (my age then)-Year Old, Single Male, seeking an 18-(my age then)-Year Old, Single Female Companion." Amazingly, this strategy accomplished nothing beyond getting him into trouble with various [[jerkops|authority]] [[manajerks|figures]] who believed that he was loitering and/or soliciting sex. Chris was particularly traumatized by a series of confrontations with the [[PVCC]] dean [[Mary Lee Walsh]] over his attraction techniques, resulting in an ongoing, completely one-sided blood feud.<br />
<br />
After a series of confrontations featuring increasingly bizarre and threatening behavior on Chris's part, Walsh expelled him for one year in [[2004]]. He eventually returned, however, obtaining an associate's degree in May [[2006]].<br />
<br />
[[Image:156-CWCMegan1.jpg|thumb|left|He can smell fear]]<br />
<br />
After college, Chris promptly dropped out of society, devoting his life to finding a [[boyfriend-free girl]], drawing ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'', [[masturbation|masturbating]] and using his [[monthly tugboat|welfare money]] to buy video games and [[sex toys]].<br />
<br />
In [[2005]], Chris met [[Megan Schroeder]] at a local game and card shop. Megan proved unusual in that she was willing to talk to Chris for more than five minutes. The two quickly became close friends, although Megan claimed to have recently endured a bad break-up and refused to entertain Chris's obvious romantic interest. Chris, being totally smooth with women due to countless hours of studying them in porn and [[anime]], believed that the key to turning Megan's platonic feelings romantic was to make inappropriate advances toward her until she had to tell him to stop touching her.<br />
<br />
In the summer of [[2007]], Chris put it all on the line by entering the [[PaRappa the Rapper Contest]] so that he could win prizes and a trip for two to Seattle, which formed the centerpiece of his plan to finally score with Megan. The contest ended in disaster for Chris, as he lost to the dreaded [[Adam Stackhouse]] and finally learned that Megan wouldn't have gone with him on the trip even if he had won.<br />
<br />
It was during the Love Quest that Chris was inspired to launch ''Sonichu'', a comic book series featuring his Electric-Hedgehog [[Pokémon]]. Ostensibly, the comic was intended to raise awareness of Chris's unbelievably original character, but within half an issue, the storylines began to revolve around the frankly more compelling saga of Chris's own personal issues. <br />
{{clear}}<br />
<br />
==Discovery==<br />
<br />
{{main|2007|2008}}<br />
[[Image:110-SchuSiteIdea2.jpg|thumb|FUCK YEAH]]<br />
<br />
Chris's rare talent was discovered when he posted an anonymous picture of Sonichu on [[4-cent garbage|4chan]]. It only took a quick Google search of Chris's name to discover the picture's author, and Chris's miserable existence spilled over onto [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] in October 2007. His life was never the same again.<br />
<br />
Upon learning of the "Chris-chan" article on ED, Chris released a single [[Chris Chan's Public Announcement|YouTube video]] attempting to diplomatically convince the site to remove the page. Failing in this, he then spent the next several months [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica|vandalizing]] the article in the vain hope of overwhelming his enemies. This catastrophically backfired as Chris, in an attempt to prove himself as lurid as the [[trolls]], revealed a great deal of embarrassing information, most notably [[ShecameforCWC.JPG|a portrait of himself fingerbanging Megan]] that ruined his most important relationship at the time. By the spring of [[2008]] Chris would be banned from both [[The Game Place|his favorite hangout]] and [[Grace Baptist Church|his parents' church]] for reasons at least partially related to information brought to light by the ED article.<br />
<br />
In August 2008 Chris [[CWC's Second Message|declared]] [[Attention All Sonichu Fans (NOT HATERS)|war]] upon Encyclopedia Dramatica in a series of videos, threatening to withhold publication of the upcoming [[Sonichu 7]] unless his vast fan base rallied to force ED to remove the "Chris-chan" article. When ED suffered outages unrelated to this crusade, Chris [[Kudos to the Encyclopedia DramaDestruction|took credit and declared victory]], guaranteeing that he would be under constant fire from trolls for years to come. This began an endless cycle in which Chris would produce videos, comics, and harebrained schemes to attack the trolls, which would in turn encourage more and more trolls to provoke him for his hilarious responses. <br />
<br />
The cycle was briefly disrupted in the fall of 2008 when Chris sent his various [[medallions]] to his [[Blanca Weiss|fake internet girlfriend]], who immediately destroyed them and broke up with him. This emotional heartbreak and the release of ''[[LittleBigPlanet]]'' reduced Chris's output of videos and other sources of [[lulz]]. At the same time, Encyclopedia Dramatica began cracking down on trolls using Chris's ED page as a forum for discussing him, and in general opinion was divided as to whether it was lulzy or faggy to continue harassing him. The resulting schism led to the creation of numerous websites (such as [[CWCki|this one]] singularly devoted to trolling Chris), which only expanded coverage of Chris's hijinks.<br />
{{clear}}<br />
<br />
==Chris today== <br />
<br />
{{main|2008|2009|2010}}<br />
<br />
[[File:Ecp00066.jpg|thumb|Chris in [[2009]]]]<br />
<br />
By late 2008, trolls controlled many aspects of Chris's life by posing as dedicated [[fans]], cartoonish enemies, and prospective business partners. Chris's ego and [[naive]]te readily embraced this world in which every woman wanted to fuck him, and every man was either trying to help him sell Sonichu products or steal the franchise for their own nefarious goals. Trolls would begin denoting major events in Chris's life as "[[saga]]s" such as the [[Miyamoto]] Saga, the [[Julie]] Saga, the [[Ivy]] Saga, the [[Liquid Chris|Liquid]] Saga, and the [[Asperchu]] Saga. All the while, the [[CWCki]] maintains a constant record of these events, ensuring that Chris cannot selectively ignore his own history.<br />
<br />
[[File:Personalprofile.jpg|thumb|left|[[OkCupid|Hello]] [[The Hook Cafe|ladies]]!]]<br />
<br />
Following his disastrous failure to woo [[The Wallflower|a real girl]] in March [[2010]], Chris began to realize what anyone else would have figured out a long time ago: his toxic [[internet]] presence is having a detrimental effect upon his real life, and each new video he creates only makes it worse. This appears to be connected to a reduction in his online presence, and the disappearance of his [[medallion]] and his [[Chris and fashion|striped shirts]]. Of late Chris has become paranoid and has grown more suspicious of anyone online, imploring everyone to meet him in person if they ''really'' want to get to know him. Of course, Chris has [[List of Chris's Lies|a penchant for lying]], so talking to him in real life is as pointless as talking to him online.<br />
<br />
Chris's desire to avoid being fooled has not made him any better at doing it, and the smart money was that sooner or later he'll fall for some "girl" that asks him to [[BlueSpike|shove stuff up his ass]]. No matter how hard Chris tries to avoid the trolling, he will always inexplicably find someone to troll him.<br />
<br />
Today Chris continues to live with his parents, living off the [[monthly tugboat|money]] he receives from the federal government as compensation for his autism, which allegedly renders him incapable of contributing to society. Since he has no job and is usually banned from any place he visits for more than thirty minutes, Chris has few social outlets and has grown increasingly withdrawn. In his desperate need for attention, he repeatedly returns to the trolls, unwittingly proving that the only people who will put up with him are those who just want him to do something stupid for them to laugh at.<br />
<br />
==Featured fan videos==<br />
<br />
{{collapsible<br />
|The videos about the life and times of Christian Weston Chandler<br />
|<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = The End of Chris-Chan <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|lddgCHYKSG4}}<br />
| Stardate = 2 April 2009<br />
| Maker = [[Vivian Gee]]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = The Rebirth of Chris-Chan <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|HSTicQs4Ke8}}<br />
| Stardate = 12 April 2009<br />
| Maker = [[Vivian Gee]]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = Chris-chan is Pitiful <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|gsbzB26sQwk}}<br />
| Stardate = 2 August 2009<br />
| Maker = CreepyMcCreep<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = Resident Chris-chan 3: Dating Ground <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|8rRi90wfvHI}}<br />
| Stardate = 1 October 2009<br />
| Maker = MewLine<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = Part 3 of the series<br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = IICHH-TIPM - the 503 faces of Chris-Chan<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|YHfZ9XCMUQQ }}<br />
| Stardate = 13 October 2009<br />
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/tehcosmicexplorer08 tehcosmicexplorer08]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = CWC a sad story<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|DxAhBoYfWy4}}<br />
| Stardate = 20 November 2009<br />
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/IBAClydeCash IBAClydeCash]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = 'My Name Is Christian Weston Chandler' Theatrical Trailer <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|TQfvFw1GMXA}}<br />
| Stardate = 8 December 2009<br />
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/wtfdavemustaine wtfdavemustaine]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = CWC's Show Must Go On<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|HZqqFUeoaEg }}<br />
| Stardate = 12 December 2009<br />
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/Secretevilguy Secretevilguy]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = Cwcville Show <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|rDyg8bxeyTM}}<br />
| Stardate = 23 December 2009<br />
| Maker = BigBlackPony<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = When Chris-Chan's Gone <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|DE2OOsKrvoU}}<br />
| Stardate = 3 January 2010<br />
| Maker = [http://www.youtube.com/user/tehcosmicexplorer08 tehcosmicexplorer08]<br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
| Other Info = <br />
}}<br />
}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
* [[Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)]], Chris's depiction of himself within his own comics.<br />
* [[Chris-chan Sonichu]], Chris's furry alter ego.<br />
* [[:Category:DVD slideshow images|Hundreds of personal photographs]] assembled for use in Chris's autobiographical [[DVD]].<br />
* [[User:GodofThunderGodofWar]], Chris's own CWCki account!<br />
<br />
==References==<br />
<br />
{{CWCipedia}}<br />
{{Fan Art|chris=Chris-Chan (fanart)|linkname=Chris}}<br />
<br />
<references /><br />
<br />
{{Chris and}}<br />
{{People}}<br />
{{Timeline}}<br />
<br />
{{DEFAULTSORT:Chandler, Christian Weston}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Chris-chan]]<br />
[[Category:Family Members]]<br />
[[Category:Real people who have appeared in Sonichu comics]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=11052009_Kacey,_I_Love_You,_and_I_Need_You&diff=12078911052009 Kacey, I Love You, and I Need You2010-10-20T01:39:57Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>"'''11052009 Kacey, I Love You, and I Need You'''" is a 6 [[November 2009]] video in which the impostor [[Ian Brandon Anderson]] apologizes for behavior towards his sweetheart [[Kacey]]'s father with an emotional speech. It seems that the [[Father Call|discussion they had together previously over the phone]] didn't go very well. Ian also proclaims an undying, eternal love for Kacey, even though she's apparently only been his [[troll|girlfriend]] for a little over a week.<br />
<br />
In an attempt to infuriate yet another rock group's fan-base, Ian used REO Speedwagon's 1984 power ballad [[KCWC_Top_10_Dedication_Special#Part_5:_.234|"I Can't Fight This Feeling"]] as background music, while he fakes emotion in a desperate bid to get [[Fuck quest|sex]]. The music drowns out Ian's declarations of love for large portions of the video. Also, his [[medallion]] is missing, thus, his feelings are not TRUE and HONEST. Also, note that despite his whining, there are no actual tears, as Kacey [[Kacey and Liquid Call|later]] observes.<br />
<br />
He occasionally refers to himself in the plural "us", or "we". One would think he might be talking about himself and Kacey, but the points he mentions are really only applicable to himself. This is possibly a renewed manifestation of his [[Captain's Log, Stardate August 30th, 2009|split personalities]].<br />
<br />
== Video ==<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = 11052009 Kacey, I Love You, and I Need You<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|EfWZbpaRbOM}}<br />
| stardate = 5 [[November 2009]]<br />
| style = {{Tragedy|text}}<br />
| saga = {{Liquid|text}}<br />
| shirt = {{RedStripeShirt|text}}<br />
| previous = [[No More Jokes]]<br />
| next = [[CWC is sad]]<br />
}}<br />
{{Quote|I stay sane most of the time.}}<br />
===Transcript===<br />
[''Dramatic [[glasses]] removal, background music starts playing'']<br />
<br />
[[Kacey]], I'm sorry about the way I did... with your father last night. Yeah, could—yeah, I realize that I could have been more respectful, and said [''salutes''], "Yes, sir"... and just stick with that. And I realize now that, some of the things he talked to me about, told—talked down to me about, were like, yeah, definitely things I should be working on. And I promise, I will get an office job. And I will make efforts to move out of my house, even though I'll probably end up with this house inheriting it.<br />
<br />
But, anyway, [''closes eyes''] Kacey, I—I love you so much I care about you. You just ma-ma-make me feel so sad—make me feel so that... Phone call where... [''[[Stress sigh|Sighs]], then squints, as though starting to tear up.''] you—you went and said some of the things your father said. Those shots with words... made me cry. [''voice breaks''] I'm not afraid to cry in front of you. If I have tears I w—I... we—we have... shed them, and we shed them in front of you. It's... it's very hard.... You just made me feel so sad that I cried. Made that phone call there.<br />
<br />
Kacey I need you. I need you. I love you. You're the best thing in my—you're the best thing in my life. The best person that's ever come into my life. You know that more than I do. You cared about our health and well-being. And I cared about you that much, as well, but, you put more—you gave me advice that I... heed—that I have thought—that I have heeded. And I am... taking the steps to wake up and get myself more stronger and healthier for you. But it's like, you know, if you—but then it's like, if you end up going back to the [[CChanSonichuCWC|other Chris]] and—[''sigh''] I don't know, it just feels like I would have done [[fuck quest|all that work for nothing]]. I need you Kacey. I care about you so much. I just can't fight the feeling. [''Sudden volume increase, sounds almost angry''] I love you! I love you! I need you.<br />
<br />
Please don't leave me. Please don't be mad at me. I made mistakes. But I'm... but a [[List of Chris's lies|man admits when he is wrong]]. And I was wrong in the way I acted last night. I'm sorry I hurt—I was very very sorry I hurt your feelings.<br />
<br />
I'd be very—I would feel terribly sad if you went back to—back to the other Chris. Please, don't leave me. [''Raises voice''] I love you! I love you! Kacey, I love you! Please don't—please come back. Don't leave me.<br />
<br />
And you need—and you need me—and you need me, as well, because, I am an [[Honest Content|honest]] and [[Vanessa Saga|very loyal]] person. And, unlike that—unlike that other Chris, I don't [[Chris and anger|go all that crazy]]. I stay sane most of the time, and, even when I try to [[Chris Calls Clyde Out|act crazy]] [''Something resembling either a chuckle or a sob'']... that lame—those are pretty much lame attempts.<br />
<br />
Anyway... anyway I, uh—you know me; I am very—[[I AM STRONG|I am strong]], and I am strong-willed. I would do whatever I could, in my [[power]], for you. Everything. It's my—my—everything I can, within my power. And I... and I will hold onto my promises, just all the other things came up, and—but—but I don't need excuses. It's not about excuses. I'm gonna uphold my promises, Kacey. And I don't want you to leave me, please. I love you. And I need you. I'll talk to you later, probably. I pray. [''Video abruptly ends'']<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[No More Jokes]]|nextlink=[[CWC is sad]]|}}<br />
{{Sweetheart Videos}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Take_that_Page_DOWN_NOW!&diff=120247Take that Page DOWN NOW!2010-10-17T05:04:28Z<p>IBAnderson: /* Transcript */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''Take that Page DOWN NOW!''' is a [[YouTube]] video posted by [[Chris]] on 30 [[March 2009]], in which he demands that his [[ED]] page be taken down. Later, Chris takes the video down, and updates a longer version, with added footage of him shouting and growling at the camera. He makes several threats on [[Clyde Cash]]'s life in this video, including a threat to "shove [his] ass down [his] throat' and "make [him] eat [his] underwear." (A line he stole directly from a ''[[South Park]]'' episode.)<br />
<br />
==Video==<br />
<br />
{{Tardrage}}<br />
<br />
<center>{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Take that Page DOWN NOW!<br />
| image = {{#ev:youtube|X02mQycxqSw}}<br />
| Stardate = 30 [[March 2009]]<br />
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]<br />
| Subject Matter = {{Violence}} [[Death threats|Violence]]<br />
| Performance Style = [[Image:rage.png]] [[Chris and anger|Rage]]<br />
| Saga = [[Image:Clyde saga.png]] [[Clyde]] saga<br />
| Shirt = [[Image:Brownshirtwithlogo.png]] Brown with Logo<br />
| previous = [[Chris Sings Fart Song for Flora#Watch|Chris Sings Fart Song for Flora]]<br />
| next = [[Take_that_Page_DOWN_NOW!#Director.27s_Cut|Take that Page DOWN NOW! (Director's Cut)]]<br />
}}<br />
</center><br />
<br />
===Transcript===<br />
<br />
Just a major up--just a small update. Well, I just wanted to, uh, ask a small favor. You know what would ''really'' inspire me to continue doing the comics? I tell you what--[''removes glasses, grows more stern'']--you take down that ED page forever. Take it down. It and al--everything about it, including the, the discussion pages. Everything. Delete it.<br />
<br />
[''sighs''] Because you don't--because that thing has been bothering me for so ma--for that long time. And you know how the expression "Too many cooks spoil the broth?" Well, call it--this was "too many ''crooks''." Too many ''crooks''! Too many ''crooks''! And that ED page is one of those crooks. [[Chris and reality|Every page--every word on the discussion page is a crook.]]<br />
<br />
Mmmm! It just makes me really [''tries to flex nonexistent muscles''] ''angry''! Nnngh, nngh! Nnnngh! You know how it makes me angry?<br />
<br />
[''reaches off camera; after jump cut, picks up the [[Clown Doll]] with picture taped to it'']<br />
<br />
This is Clyde. <br />
<br />
[''jump cut to Chris holding doll in left hand and making fist with right'']<br />
<br />
And ''this'' is how angry I am for every waking moment that that ED page is up. [''begins pounding the shit out of doll'']<br />
<br />
[''reaches down to retrieve picture, rips it in half''] NNNGH!<br />
<br />
[''looks into camera, sneering''] You want me to calm down? [[Chris and anger|YOU WANT ME TO CALM DOWN?]] You want me to draw the comics? YOU TAKE DOWN THAT ED PAGE! [''picks up piece of picture, puts it back on doll''] Or Clyde is--BAM! [''resumes punching his clown'']<br />
<br />
==Director's Cut==<br />
<br />
{{Tardrage}}<br />
<br />
<center>{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = Take that Page DOWN NOW! (Director's Cut)<br />
| image = {{#ev:youtube|KYATxB7NXAY}}<br />
| Stardate = 30 [[March 2009]]<br />
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]<br />
| Subject Matter = {{Violence|text}}<br />
| Performance Style = [[Image:rage.png]] [[Chris and anger|Rage]]<br />
| Saga = [[Image:Clyde saga.png]] [[Clyde]] saga<br />
| Shirt = [[Image:Brownshirtwithlogo.png]] Brown with Logo<br />
| previous = [[Take_that_Page_DOWN_NOW!#Video|Take that Page DOWN NOW!]]<br />
| next = [[Secret Weapon#Video|Secret Weapon]]<br />
}}<br />
</center><br />
<br />
{{quote|I am going SHOVE your ASS DOWN YOUR THROAT...AND MAKE YOU EAT YOUR UNDERWEAR!}}<br />
<br />
===Transcript===<br />
<br />
[''jump cut, apparently later in the day; Chris is tensing is arms and either hulking up or trying to fart''] Ngh...EEENNNNRRRRGGHHHH!!!<br />
<br />
[''picks up doll again, tries to tear its head off, fails''] EENNGH--GGH! <br />
<br />
[''begins beating it more savagely''] NGH! NGH! [''throws it to ground, reaches down to <s>rape</s> pound on it''] NGH! NGH-NGH-NGH-NGH-NGH-NGH-NGH-NGH!<br />
<br />
[''pops back up to give a primal growl''] ERRRNNNRGGGHH! URRRGH! RRRGH-HAAAGHH! EERGHHAAGHH!<br />
<br />
[''gives [[Claw of Fail]] as he stares off into space, talking like the Ultimate Warrior''] '''CLYDE DO YOU HEAR ME? YOU ARE ''DEAAAD''! YOU ARE ''DEAD''!''' [''hiccups''] '''YOU ARE DEAD! AND SO IS THAT PAGE! RRARRGGH--'''[''hic'']'''--RRRGGHH!!''' [''snorts''] '''EEEEENNRRRHHH!''' [''begins smacking his fist into his palm'']<br />
<br />
[''jump cut; Christian is speaking normally again'']<br />
<br />
Mmm! You despi--you are so despicable, Clyde! I am going to BEAT your lights out! [''performs Claw of Fail again'']I am going to DRAG you right in front of EVERYONE if we ever meet in public! I am going SHOVE your ASS DOWN YOUR THROAT--[''Ultimate Warrior voice'']--'''AND MAKE YOU EAT YOUR UNDERWEAR! NNNGHHGGGHH!'''<br />
<br />
[''throws something into his camera, obscuring it''] <br />
<br />
{{RageQuote|'''''NNNAGGHHHH!!!'''''}}<br />
<br />
==Fan videos==<br />
<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = Chris Chan's Ultimate Attack <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|cwe-1Ejl5FU}}<br />
| Stardate = 31 March 2009<br />
| Maker = Trowelhands <br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[THAT IS MY HOUSE]]<br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
*[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GmTvwy7Emgs Reversed]<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Chris Sings Fart Song for Flora]]|nextlink=[[Secret Weapon]]|}}<br />
{{Troll Videos}}<br />
<br />
{{Clyde Saga}}<br />
<br />
[[Category: Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=CWC_Cola&diff=120236CWC Cola2010-10-17T02:03:55Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>[[Image:SchuComicSP3P8.jpg|thumb|[[Chris]] and [[Ivy]] drinking CWC Orange after their [[sex]]. Little does Ivy know her drink is [[semen|spiked]].]]<br />
[[Image:CWCOrangeAd.png|thumb|right|[[April 16 Fetish Vids|<br />
Refreshing!]]]]<br />
'''CWC Cola''' (or '''CWC-Cola''') is [[Chris's]] official soft drink brand. Currently holds a state enforced monopoly of the lucrative soft-drink market in [[CWCville]]. Some suggest that it contains a [[semen|secret ingredient]] that Chris personally makes. It is the state-mandated beverage of CWCville, and is the only consumable beverage. [[Chris and health|Not even water can be consumed.]]<br />
<br />
==History==<br />
<br />
According to [[Jamsta Sonichu]] in ''[[Sonichu 9]]'', the CWC Cola Company was founded in [[1985]] by [[Bob Chandler|Robert Franklin Chandler Jr]], three years after he founded CWCville.<br />
<br />
==CWC Cola==<br />
The formula for '''CWC Cola''' is similar to the formula used in Pepsi-Cola.<ref>His [http://sonichusite.deviantart.com/ deviantART journal]. (b&'d)</ref><br />
<br />
==Variations and other products==<br />
<br />
*CWC Orange<br />
<br />
*Diet CWCcola<br />
<br />
*CWC Lemonda<br />
<br />
*CWC Grape<br />
<br />
*Cherry Cola<br />
**Possibly not from the CWC-brand. [[Blake]] was born from '''Cherry Cola'''.<br />
<br />
==References in comics==<br />
* In ''Sonichu 9'', [[Punchy Sonichu]] purchases CWC Cola.<br />
<br />
==Sauces==<br />
<references /><br />
<br />
==See Also==<br />
* [[My Coke Rewards]]<br />
<br />
[[Category:Chris-chan]]<br />
[[Category:Sonichu]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=It%27s_UGH!&diff=120235It's UGH!2010-10-17T01:47:41Z<p>IBAnderson: /* Transcript */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''It's UGH!''' is a video [[Chris]] uploaded on 24 [[July 2009]] before removing it a short time later in usual CWC fashion. The video features him begrudgingly singing along to the song [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3j4t185wl-0 Ok2bgay] by Norwegian group Tomboy, which had been uploaded to his previous account when it was hacked in June. At the end of the video he curses at [[Jack Thaddeus]] (who had made [[Chris humps his PS3|Chris hump his PS3]] within the same day) and "[[Samantha Thaddeus E-mails|Samantha whatever]]."<br />
<br />
==Video==<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = It's UGH!<br />
| image = {{#ev:youtube|tvSmjxpNb20}}<br />
| Stardate = 24 July 2009<br />
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]<br />
| Subject Matter = {{Music}} Music, {{Homos}} Homos<br />
| Shirt = {{BrownLogoShirt2}} Brown with Blue Logo<br />
| previous = [[REAL Protest against the FAKE]]<br />
| next = [[It's UGH!#Remake Video|It's____]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
===Transcript===<br />
<br />
[''Up until 0:36, the only audio from the video is the song "Ok2bgay". Chris starts singing at 0:37, in a very unsettling and [[alcohol|drunken]] growling voice/Kermit the Frog impression. Chris actually talks at 4:04.'']<br />
<br />
<poem>It's okay to be [[gay]], let's rejoice with the boys in the gay way<br />
Hooray for the kind of man that you will find in the gay way<br />
It's okay to be gay, let's rejoice with the boys in the gay way<br />
Hooray for the kind of man that you will find in the gay way<br />
<br />
Father figures we are <br />
You're a shooting star you come so far<br />
I was once in your shoes <br />
In a closet like you<br />
I had nothing to lose<br />
<br />
Hey man gay man pick up the soap <br />
Get on your knees and pray<br />
Hey man gay man<br />
Release your [[semen|load]]<br />
You've got to cease to delay<br />
The gay way<br />
<br />
It's okay to be gay, let's rejoice with the boys in the gay way<br />
Hooray for the kind of man that you will find in the gay way<br />
Hooray! For the man!<br />
<br />
Ooh, strong man<br />
Queen of the balls <br />
Some brotherly love is a pleasure for all<br />
Come out<br />
Open your eyes<br />
It's a matter of size<br />
<br />
Hey man gay man pick up the soap <br />
Get on your knees and pray<br />
Hey man gay man <br />
Release your load <br />
you've got to cease to delay <br />
The gay way<br />
<br />
It's okay to be gay, let's rejoice with the boys in the gay way ''[gagging sounds]''<br />
Okay to be gay!<br />
Hooray for the kind of man that you will find in the gay way<br />
<br />
Sing hallelujah (sing hallelujah)<br />
It's getting to ya (it's getting to ya)<br />
<br />
Hey! Ho! Mo! Hey! Ho! Mo! Hey! Ho!<br />
Now remember <br />
There's a big difference between kneeling down and bending over<br />
<br />
It's okay to be gay, let's rejoice with the boys in the gay way<br />
It's okay!<br />
Hooray for the kind of man that you will find in the gay way<br />
<br />
West is where you should go <br />
To San Francisco<br />
I get that you know <br />
Would you gather my face<br />
So united we stand in a gay parade<br />
A human serenade<br />
<br />
Hooray for the kind of man that you will find in the gay way<br />
It's okay to be gay, let's rejoice with the boys in the gay way<br />
Hooray for the kind of man that you will find in the gay way <br />
It's okay to be gay!<br />
<br />
Ugh. Yech. Ung... uck. Damn you, Jack Thaddeus slash Samantha whatever.</poem><br />
<br />
==Remake==<br />
[[Image:TrickeryFail.jpg|thumb|Chris thought he would be clever if he made the video by not actually titling the video "It's Okay to be Gay," in addition to having tags "It's a Mockery you damn, dirty [[homos]]."]]<br />
<br />
[[Jack Thaddeus]], not satisfied with a video of Chris singing in a dumb voice and covering most of the camera as part of Chris's attempt, wanted a version of Chris singing it with more vigor.<br />
<br />
'''It's____''', a remake of It's UGH! was uploaded on the following day, 25th [[July 2009]]. Chris is seen disguised with a Groucho mask, along with the hat and jacket of his [[Officer Nasty]] sex doll. Note, surprisingly, that Chris looks somewhat thinner in this video which just goes to show that black (and stained sex-doll accessories) really is slimming. The Youtube search tags read out, "It's a Mockery you damn dirty [[homos]]." He changes some of the pronouns of the lyrics to "she". In the last sentence of the video, he says that it's not okay to be gay, as yet another feeble attempt to "outwit" the [[trolls]].<br />
<br />
{{clear}}<br />
<br />
===Video===<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = It's____<br />
| image = {{#ev:youtube|-zwRscjKze4}}<br />
| Stardate = 24 July 2009<br />
| Subject Matter = {{Music}} Music, {{Homos}} Homos<br />
| Maker = [[Christian Weston Chandler]]<br />
| previous = [[It's UGH!#Video|It's UGH!]]<br />
| next = [[Cwc dare]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
===Transcript===<br />
<br />
[[Random-access humor|Merry Kickmas. Why not?]]<br />
<br />
It's okay be gay, let's rejoice with the boys in the gay way<br />
Hooray for the kind of man that you will find in the gay way<br />
It's okay to be gay, let's rejoice with the boys in the gay way<br />
Hooray for the kind of man that ''she'' will find in the gay way<br />
<br />
Father figures we are <br />
You're a shooting star you've come so far<br />
I was once in your shoes <br />
In a closet like you<br />
I had nothing to lose<br />
<br />
Hey man gay man pick up the soap <br />
Get on your knees and pray<br />
Hey man gay man<br />
Release your load<br />
You've got to cease to delay<br />
The gay way<br />
<br />
It's okay to be gay, let's rejoice with the boys in the gay way<br />
Hooray for the kind of man that ''she'' will find in the gay way<br />
Hooray! For the man!<br />
<br />
Ooh, strong man<br />
queen of the balls <br />
some brotherly love is a pleasure for all<br />
Come out<br />
open your eyes<br />
it's a matter of size. Siiiiize<br />
<br />
Hey man gay man pick up the soap <br />
Get on your knees and pray<br />
Hey man gay man <br />
Release your load <br />
you've got to cease to delay <br />
The gay way<br />
<br />
It's okay to be gay, let's rejoice with the boys in the gay way<br />
Okay to be gay!<br />
Hooray for the kind of man that you will find in the gay way<br />
<br />
Sing hallelujah <br />
It's getting to ya <br />
<br />
Hey! Ho! Mo! Hey! Ho! Mo! Hey! Homo dork!<br />
Now remember <br />
There's a big difference between kneeling down and bending over<br />
<br />
It's okay to be gay! ...'sokay to be gay! let's rejoice with the boys in the gay way<br />
It's okay!<br />
Hooray for the kind of man that ''she'' will find in the gay way<br />
<br />
West is where you should go <br />
To San Francisco<br />
I get that you know <br />
Would you gather my face<br />
So united we stand in a gay parade<br />
A human serenade (cough)<br />
<br />
(mumbling) Hooray! Hooray! Hooray! for the kind of man that ''she'' will find in the gay way<br />
It's okay to be gay, let's rejoice with the boys in the gay way<br />
Hooray for the kind of man that you will find in the gay way<br />
It's ''not'' okay to be gay!<br />
<br />
==Fan videos==<br />
{{Infobox/Fanvideo<br />
| name = Chris Chan Is Louis Armstrong <br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|6FpV-Xkaxo0}}<br />
| Stardate = 9 January 2010<br />
| Maker = RandomVideoDump <br />
| Subject = <br />
| Video Type = <br />
}}<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[REAL Protest against the FAKE]]|nextlink=[[Cwc dare]]|}}<br />
{{Music Videos}}<br />
{{Troll Videos}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Homos]]<br />
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]</div>IBAndersonhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=100_2265&diff=118528100 22652010-10-08T19:56:35Z<p>IBAnderson: </p>
<hr />
<div>[[File:Robble.jpg|thumb|left|Graphic re-enactment of the video]]<br />
[[File:Hamburglar.jpg|thumb|The Hamburglar laughs at an [[Ian Brandon Anderson|impostor]]]]<br />
<br />
'''100 2265''' is a [[Random access humor|bizarre, nonsensical]] video [[Chris]] uploaded on 3 [[October 2010]]. In it, we see Chris, clad in his female support garment and what appears to be some sort of black wrapping, babbling about hamburgers in an incoherent manner. He tries to imitate the fast-food icon [[wikipedia:Hamburglar|the Hamburglar]] by prancing around [[Chris's room|his room]] shouting "robble robble" in a nasally, high-pitched voice. Even when acting crazy, Chris somehow manages to screw things up as his costume lacks several key elements.<br />
{{-}}<br />
==Video==<br />
{{Infobox/video<br />
| name = 100 2265<br />
| video = {{#ev:youtube|W3gD0VWFA3U}}<br />
| stardate = 3 [[October 2010]]<br />
| subject = Robble (?)<br />
| style = {{Crazy|text}}<br />
| shirt = {{cwcbra|text}}<br />
| previous = [[Lars_Is_Jivin'.MP4#Full_version|Lars Is Jivin'.MP4]]<br />
| next = [[100 2266]]<br />
}}<br />
<br />
=== Transcription ===<br />
<br />
[[File:RonaldWTF.png|thumb|Ronald would like to congratulate the CWCki's experts of video transcription... not that the transcription helped him much in this case.]]<br />
<br />
''[Chris appears in his [[muscle bra]] with strips of black tape over his rotund figure. He has likewise taped over his eyes, to imitate the Hamburglar's mask]''<br />
<br />
'eeyyyyyy folks! Robble, robble, robble!<br />
<br />
''[Some of the tape has fallen off, Chris adjusts it.]''<br />
<br />
I'm Hamburglar here! Deep fat-frying fat-ridin'(?) robber here! Robble, robble!<br />
<br />
''[Chris points to a blurry, out-of-focus image of a Big Mac on his television]''<br />
<br />
I'm gonna steal me that Big Mac there! Robble, robble, robble! It's so delicious! Robble, robble, robble!<br />
<br />
''[Chris moves closer to the screen and begins gesturing at the image.]''<br />
<br />
Oh, robble, robble, robble, robble, robble! Two whole/all beef patties! Robble, robble, robble, robble! [[Navy|Special Sauce]]! Robble, robble, robble, robble, robble! Onions, [[Pickle|pickles]], cheese! Robble, robble, robble, robble! All on a sesame seed bun! ''[Chris pronounces "bun" like "biyun" here.]'' Robble, robble, robble! <br />
<br />
''[The image of the Big Mac briefly comes into focus.]''<br />
<br />
MCDONAAAALD'S! Robble, robble, robble, robble, robble! Robble, robble, robble!<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[McDonald's]]<br />
*[[Obesity]]<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Lars Is Jivin'.MP4#Full_version|Lars Is Jivin'.MP4]]|nextlink=[[100 2266]]}}<br />
{{Sweetheart Videos}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]</div>IBAnderson