CWCki - User contributions [en]

User:IconOfEvi

2021-04-05T02:01:30Z

IconOfEvi:

When I get better at art, I'll work on an idea I've been nursing - "The Legend Of Inos", a tale which will show that behind the whacked out facade, he has lead a truly incredible life, filled with war, hate, love, and in the end, a coming to peace with himself. Another idea is a story of Allison Amber attempting a coup, but failing, and Amber realizing that the tyranny of CWCville cannot be saved. It can only be purged.

A note - I finally found the page with all the UserBoxes. Damn I'm stupid

Infos:

Me:
{{Americunt}}
{{Asian}}
{{Straight}}
{{Hikikomori}}

CWCki Infos:
{{Warrior}}
{{VivianGee}}

Misc:
{{EDUser}}
{{MartialArtist}}

User:IconOfEvi

2017-11-01T06:17:18Z

IconOfEvi:

In short, a guy from Wisconsin. Am one of the hated long time observers, first time postars.

After seeing the fail that is Chris, my doldrums went away.

When I get better at art, I'll work on an idea I've been nursing - "The Legend Of Inos", a tale which will show that behind the whacked out facade, he has lead a truly incredible life, filled with war, hate, love, and in the end, a coming to peace with himself.

Another idea is a story of Allison Amber attempting a coup, but failing, and Amber realizing that the tyranny of CWCville cannot be saved. It can only be purged.

A note - I finally found the page with all the UserBoxes. Damn was it tucked away.

Infos:

Me:
{{Americunt}}
{{Asian}}
{{Straight}}
{{Hikikomori}}

CWCki Infos:
{{Warrior}}
{{VivianGee}}

Misc:
{{EDUser}}
{{MartialArtist}}

File talk:JuniorMoviePoster.png

2012-04-29T12:28:03Z

IconOfEvi:

Think it should stay.[[User:Theiselybros|Theiselybros]] 15:21, 19 September 2011 (PDT)
:Seconded. --[[User:T K 19|T K 19]] 16:58, 19 September 2011 (PDT)
::Indeed, why delete it? It describes the birthing videos pretty well! --[[User:IconOfEvi|IconOfEvi]] 05:28, 29 April 2012 (PDT)

File:CWCstalin1.png

2012-04-27T11:56:01Z

IconOfEvi:

[[Category:Chris fan art]]

"When you kill one troll...it is a victory. When you kill ten million! It is a statistic."

Manajerks

2012-04-20T09:25:32Z

IconOfEvi: Turdijerk speculations

[[Image:B-manajerk_real.jpg|thumb|right|Artist's rendition of what the B-Manajerk may have actually looked like, based on Chris's descriptions.]]

'''Manajerks''' (a [[Wikipedia:Portmanteau|portmanteau]] of "manager" and "[[jerk]]") are villains featured in [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'' comics]], most prominently in the [[Sub-Episodes]], who regularly antagonize [[Chris]]'s [[Christian Weston Chandler (comic character)|comic book counterpart]]. They are based on a multitude of real life store managers who all threw Chris out of their places of business for being a creepy stalker during his [[Love Quest]]. In the comic, the manajerks are all super powered agents of the [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens]], whom Chris and his team of recolors regularly have to defeat.

==Manajerks in real life==
Real-life manajerks, or as they're known to people who aren't infantile buffoons, "managers," are employees responsible for organizing other employees to accomplish desired goals within a business. While sometimes frustrating to those who work under their supervision, managers usually seek only to improve the productivity and prosperity of their workplace, thus benefiting both customer and employee alike.

At times, the duties of a manager can sometimes require them to take charge of difficult situations, such as a [[Chris|patron]] who loiters in [[Target|the workplace]], purchasing nothing and using the facilities as his personal retreat. Such situations can have a negative effect on the business. For example, if this hypothetical patron happened to be [[Chris and health|unwilling to shower]] and had numbers of pairs of [[Dirty Crapped Briefs|dirty crapped briefs]], his odor might prove distasteful to paying customers. Similarly, if this purely fictional patron should happen to hold [[Attraction Sign|a sign]] expressing his desire for [[Sex|intimate relations]] with young white women, it might also put off paying customers who would find the patron [[autistic|crude and bizarre]]. In situations like these, it's often a manager's responsibility to step in, and inform the patron that his behavior is inappropriate for a place of business. If the patron becomes [[Chris and negotiation|unresponsive or difficult]], the manager may also be charged with contacting the [[Jerkops|proper authorities]] to have him escorted (forcibly, if need be) from the premises.

==Manajerks in ''Sonichu''==
In the pages of ''Sonichu'', manajerks, like [[jerkops]], [[Mary Lee Walsh|college deans]], [[CADD Chef|CADD instructors]], and other [[Jerkhief|authority figures]], are all tyrannical cockblockers who want nothing more than to ruin Chris's life. To this end, whenever Chris enters a public place to spend hours drawing comics, playing [[video games]], building [[Heart Torch of Fail|crude sculptures]] with [[Pixelblocks]], and panhandling for sexual favors, these evil manajerks descend upon him like the Gestapo, ordering him to leave and never return. Just as Chris refuses to recognize the authority of private security personnel and the police, he also dismisses the manajerks as having no say in how he abuses their businesses. It's also worth noting that Chris seems to have only a nebulous grasp of how businesses work (e.g. his suggestion that you "tip your waitress" the next time you visit your local [[GameStop]]),<ref>[[PS3 History Level]]</ref> which may explain why he takes their actions so personally.

Since Chris tends to assume all of his enemies are conspiring against him in one great, monolithic organization, he depicts the manajerks and jerkops as operatives of the same [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|Chris-hating team]], with [[Mary Lee Walsh]] as its leader. Similarly, Chris also assumes that any perceived attack against him is an attack against anything he believes he represents, and so the manajerks and other enemies are depicted as being anti-romance, anti-[[virgin]], anti-[[autistic]], etc.

Though Chris has depicted manajerks numerous times in the comics, not much is actually known about how they operate. Unlike jerkops, who have known to target any and all lovers in the city of [[CWCville]] during their invasions,<ref>http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_5/Page_25</ref> the manajerks seem to target Chris and only Chris. This would seem to make them appear to be assassins of a sort, but Chris is only ever seen being attacked by them while in stores, such as [[Target]], [[Wal-Mart]] or [[McDonalds]], which may instead suggest that the manajerks really are store managers, but they just happen to be evil love-hating footsoldiers of PVCC as well. Following the revelation in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu #10'']] that all the manajerks were brainwashed just like the jerkops were, this seems most likely.

Of note however, is that Chris refers to all the stores where these confrontations take place by a comic book alias. In the comic, he isn't getting thrown out of [[Fashion Square Mall]]; he's fighting in the ''Fa-Square'', of the ''Sho-Mall Region''. Target is similarly referred to as the Get-Tar Region and Wal-Mart is the Mal-Wart Region and the McDonalds in the Wal-Mart became M-C-D-Ville. The manajerks are shown to reside in and possibly rule over these regions, as [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu #7'']] refers to manajerk [[ScotPalazzo]] as having "banned all virgins from his region", which seems to suggest that the manajerks were not restricted to just being soldiers, but were more like war lords. This of course raises the question however, of how bad things have to be in [[CWCville]] that terrorists are able to take over whole shopping complexes and declare ownership of them.

===B-Manajerk===
[[Image:B-Manajerk.jpg|thumb|200px|right|Based on a True Story]]

B-Manajerk was a manajerk first featured in [[Sonichu 3|''Sonichu #3'']] and [[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu #4'']]. To date, he is one of the only villains that Chris has ever been able to defeat single-handedly, as almost every other one-on-one fight Chris has ever had in the comics inevitably ended with him getting beaten half to death [[Chris and writing|until he was saved by another character]]. Not much is known about the B-Manajerk, not even his real name. What little we do know comes from Chris's own records of their encounters, as described below. If Chris's accounts are anything to go by, The B-Manajerk was the manager of the McDonald's in the Wal-Mart Chris got kicked out of, or else a subordinate to the man Chris identifies only as a "Merried Seinor Comic". One way or another, Chris was kicked out of the McDonald's, but felt that he was still entitled to loiter in the rest of the Wal-Mart and play with [[Pixelblocks]]. Since this was outside of the B-Manajerk's jurisdiction, he called in the manager of the Wal-Mart to deal with him, at which point Chris ran off like a little bitch, which Chris seems to consider a brilliant tactical victory.<ref>[[CWC's Diary]]</ref>

<small>{{quote|June 22, 2005: Let me begin this entry with what happened two days ago. I had my setup at the [[McDonald's]] at [[Mal-Wart|Wal-Mart]], and apparently complaints were made. The two [[Manajerks|manajerkss]], a [[Merried Seinor Comic|Seinor Comic]], and a [[Black]], Fat Jerk (he looked a lot like the leader of the [[Jerkops]] at the [[Charlottesville Fashion Square|Mall]], whom I refer to now as the [[Jerkhief]]) approached me and took me for a fall with my trying to find a [[Boyfriend-Free Girl]], like I have been doing for the past [[Love quest|over one-year and ten-months]]. We argued and disputed, until the two of them left to call the police. While they were gone, I had taken off the [[Attraction Sign|sign]] from my Nintendo DS and hidden it on the back cover of my diary. When the Jerkops came, they were all like “What seems to be the problem?” And the Merried Seinor Comic was like, “Where’s the Sign?” And I was, “What sign?” And another argument was had between the four of us, in which I NEVER gave any of those JERKS Eye-Contact, because none of them deserved it!. So, I got kicked out from the McDonald’s, not the Wal-Mart, for the rest of the day. Now for what happened today, I was starting to setup my things, and the B-Manajerk was getting in my face (I feel that he really hates me), and he was like, “Don’t set up your stuff. Don’t push me.” I was not going to use the Nintendo DS sign today, anyway. But he did not want my [[Pixelblocks|Pixelblock]] sculptors at all. I stood up against that Manajerk; I continued to build, and I dictated my situation into his face (with a song and dance). He went up to the [[W-M-Manajerk|Wal-Mart Manajerk]], and he was like, “Hey, Let’s talk.” But I sat silent for a minute, then I said to him, “I do not speek to any Man other than myself, because they all have taken all the pretty girls leaving me with none.” [[Virgin with rage|Verbal Combat]] had started, and during the fight, I ran off, still giving verbal punishment, as well as da finger, and many “[[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|Curse-Ye-Ha-Me-Has]].” I nearly backed up onto him with my car, and I gave him another finger. Then I dashed off.|Extract from [[CWC's Diary]]}}</small>

The B-Manajerk first appeared in Sub-Episode 4, which was featured in [[Sonichu 3|''Sonichu #3'']] and reused in [[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu #4'']]. In this embellished version of the real-life encounter, Chris sits peacefully at the McDonald's, which he terms "M-C-D-Ville" in the "[[Mal-Wart]] Region", until the B-Manajerk and the Merried Seinor Comic confront him preemptively. While the Merried Seinor Comic has cybernetic arms and legs, the B-Manajerk is arrayed in golden armor, wears glasses and has a round head, looking a great deal like the [[Jerkhief]], as Chris describes in his journal entry. He is also armed with a golden axe and a pair of large guns. B-Manajerk explains that the Jerkhief warned them about Chris, and since having a mate of any kind is a violation of Mal-Wart law, they plan to "intercept" him, using [[Mecha-Jerkops]] on loan from the Jerkhief.

Though outnumbered, Chris stands his ground, and [[Darkbind Sonichu]] comes to his aid, destroying the Mecha-Jerkops and defeating the Merried Seinor Comic so that Chris can battle the B-Manajerk one-on-one. He transforms into [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]], and the "[[anime wings]]" he had been wearing on his head transform into working wings, similar to the power-up from ''Super Mario 64''. The B-Manajerk uses rocket boosters mounted to his back to confront Chris-Chan in an aerial duel, but Chris uses several techniques to confuse and misdirect him, including a decoy made of Pixelblocks. After defeating the B-Manajerk, Chris lectured both of his enemies on the importance of his [[Love Quest]] and the absolute necessity of his [[Attraction Sign]].

The B-Manajerk would briefly return in the pages of [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu #7'']], when he and his fellow Manajerks attended the council of villains at PVCC, where [[Mary Lee Walsh]] announced Chris's disappearance into the [[Time Void]].

Contrary to popular belief, this was actually not the last anyone saw or heard of B-Manajerk and his partner however, like it was for so many others before them. Though he was never actually ''seen'' again, the B-Manajerk was mentioned during the events of [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu #9'']]. Towards the end of the issue, whilst [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]] return from the battle against [[Naitsirhc]], [[Giovanni]] and [[Robotnik]], they receive a psychic message from [[Magi-Chan]] informing them of the state of the battle. In the same textwall in which he announces the death of [[Ivy]] and the destruction of the [[Decepti-Clones]], he briefly mentions that B-Manajerk and Merried Seinor Comic had somehow grown to a gigantic size and took part in the battle with the rest of [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|PVCC]]. The battle is never actually shown, but Magi-Chan assures Sonichu and the readers that they were defeated by the Kart Megazord owned by the CWC-[[Power Rangers]] and that the two of them were shrunk back to their original size. The Kart Megazord itself is briefly glimpsed in the background.<ref>http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_9/Page_93</ref>

This would be the last time the manajerks were ever seen or heard from in the comics. In [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu #10'']], Chris would use his [[Colossal Chan]] form to completely destroy PVCC and undo the brainwashing effect used to control all it's members. According to [[Mailbag 52]], this freed all the manajerks too. Chris later stated that the manajerks were cleared by the [[CWCville]] courts for their crimes, due to the fact that they couldn't help their actions at the time, but that they were depowered before being set free.{{cite}}

[[Chris and race|And yes, the "B" in "B-Manajerk" does stand for "black"]].<ref>In the [[videobooks]], Chris refers to B-Manajerk as "Black Manajerk", so the B must stand for "black".</ref>

===Merried Seinor Comic/Kirby===
[[Image:MSC.jpg|thumb|left|You're missing both your arms, you work in a [[McDonalds]], and you have the most embarrassing and incomprehensible name in the world. Obviously the answer is to go into supervillainy.]]

Merried Seinor Comic (not to be confused with the [[Giant Penis Comic]]) is possibly the most unfortunately named villain in all of ''[[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]]'', as one can't even figure out what words [[Chris]] was trying to write or what meaning they could possibly convey. The name of his real life counterpart, Kirby McDerbie, offers no insight into this strangeness. [[Trolls]] on [[Krapple|/cwc/]] have been speculating for as long as the character has been around, but no-one has ever been able to determine for sure what his name actually means, though some have guessed that Chris may have meant to say "Married Senior Comic".

The Merried Seinor Comic appeared for the first time in [[Sonichu 3|''Sonichu #3'']], helping the [[B-Manajerk]] in his opposition of Chris's [[Love Quest]]. He is one half of the McDuo of the City of [[McDonalds|M-C-D-Ville]] of the Region of [[Mal-Wart]]. He has cybernetic arms and legs and is armed with a broadsword, for no apparent reason except that it allows Chris to recreate the Black Knight scene from ''[[Monty Python]] and the Holy Grail''.<ref>[[:Image:MSCPython.jpg]]</ref> In the comic, (no pun intended), Merried Seinor Comic was defeated in a sword fight by [[Darkbind Sonichu]], whilst Chris defeated his partner. In [[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu #4'']], which continues the two part story, the [[W-M-Manajerk]] arrives as back-up, but when he fails as well the McDuo flee the scene, with the Comic not seeming to even care about the recent loss of both his arms.

In [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu #7'']], the character appears at [[Mary Lee Walsh]]'s villain convention, where he is even more inexplicably described as Merried Seinor Comic/Kirby, although the "Kirby" has been [[Retroactive continuity in Sonichu|removed in more recent versions]]. This is the last time the character is seen, but as mentioned above, he did participate in the Battle of CWCville offscreen, becoming a giant along with the B-Manajerk and fighting the Kart Megazord. It is presumed that he was depowered and set free like the other manajerks after [[Colossal Chan]] reversed [[Mary Lee Walsh]]'s brainwashing.

===W-M-Manajerk===
[[Image:W-M-Manajerk.jpg|thumb|200px|An average day, for W-M-Manajerk.]]

After Chris was kicked out of the Wal-Mart's McDonalds, as was described above, he returned two days later, apparently feeling that his expulsion only applied to the McDonalds, and not the entire building. The man he identifies as "B-Manajerk", frustrated with Chris's unwelcome return, asked the Wal-Mart manager to deal with him. After a terse argument, Chris fled, flipping the Wal-Mart Manager off, and shouting his [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha|weeaboo magic spells]] at him. Clearly upset by the events of June 20-22, [[2005]], Chris took revenge in the only way he could; by turning these men into fictional supervillains he could defeat in his [[Chris and reality|fantasy life]].

In the [[You know what%2C I HATE ME TOO!!!]] segment Christian put on his [[ED]] page in [[March 2008]], he says he "got [his] ass handed to [him] by a cripple" with an image from Sub-Episode 5 of W-M-Manajerk beating up Chris-Chan. This could imply that the real life W-M-Manajerk might be crippled, perhaps explaining the reason he has a robotic body in the comics.

The W-M-Manajerk character first appeared at the end of Sub-Episode 4, which was featured in [[Sonichu 3|''Sonichu #3'']] and reused in [[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu #4'']]. In the comic, Chris defeats B-Manajerk and Merried Seinor Comic with the help of [[Darkbind Sonichu]] at the end of Sub-Episode 4. Darkbind leaves, thinking the crisis resolved, but soon Chris is confronted by another enemy, the W-M-Manajerk. Unlike the B-Manajerk, who seems to be a human clad in armor, the W-M-Manajerk appears to be merely a human head in a jar, mounted atop a massive robot body. His appearance seems to be based on [[Wikipedia:Richard Nixon|Richard Nixon]] in ''[[Futurama]]''.

The story continues in Sub-Episode 5, where Chris and the W-M-Manajerk do battle. Unlike the "verbal combat" in his real life encounter, the fight here is completely physical, with W-M pretty much beating the crap out of Chris, as you might expect a giant robot would. Just as Chris begins to lose hope though, he receives a vision from the [[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan]], who informs him that he must combine the powers of his [[Medallion of Fail]] with his [[Heart Torch of Fail]] to summon his [[Crystal Weston Chandler (character)|Dream Sibling of Fail]]. Realizing that his ancestor is referring to Crystal, whom he had previously drawn on one of his home-made [[Yu-gi-Oh!]] cards, Chris follows his advice and manages to create a physical body for his imaginary twin sister.

Undaunted, W-M-Manajerk presses his attack, but when Chris and Crystal transform into [[Chris-Chan Sonichu]] and [[Crystalina Rosechu]] respectively, they quickly overpower him. By combining their ultimate attacks--Chris's [[Curse-ye-ha-me-ha]] and Crystal's Shocking Tiara Magic, they destroy the Manajerk's armor, leaving only his disembodied head.

Crystal gives W-M a long, boring talk about how important it is for Chris to get laid, and how W-M is missing out on some "awesomly great emotions, big time". Even Chris gets tired of hearing the bitch ramble on, and he stops her to ask who sent W-M-Manajerk in the first place. W-M reveals that he, along with B-Manajerk and Merried Seinor Comic, were agents of the [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens]] lead by [[Mary Lee Walsh]]. Furious that Walsh has attacked him again, Chris and Crystal kick the head-jar all the way back to PVCC, where it strikes Mary on the head.

W-M-Manajerk would briefly return (sans body) in the pages of [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu #7'']], when he and his fellow Manajerks attended the council of villains at PVCC.

Unlike B-Manajerk's armor, W-M-Manajerk's robot body is actually pretty damn strong. It survives several attacks from both Chris and Crystal, and appeared to possess super-strength, being able to effortlessly lift [[Obesity|the very heavy]] Chris high above its head, and was also able to punch him with sufficient strength to send him flying backwards into a soda fountain. The jar containing his head appears to be quite durable as well, since it survived being kicked from Mal-Wart to PVCC without breaking, even upon collision with [[Mary Lee Walsh]]'s head. It can be assumed that the head-jar also acted as a kind of life support system.

Only the combined power of Chris-Chan Sonichu and Crystalina Rosechu were able to defeat the W-M-Manajerk's body. As these are two of the more powerful characters in the series, that makes W-M-Manajerk a pretty major league guy. Of course, now that he's just a head, his threat level is severely diminished. Hell, [[Rosechu]] could probably beat him up now.

===ScotPalazzo===
[[Image:SchuComic8Page36.jpg|thumb|left|170px|ScotPalazzo: a villain who has an uncanny talent of unnaturally bending his arms around tables at 90 degree angles.]]

The only man on the planet to spell his first and last name without a space, and possibly the first manajerk Chris encountered, ScotPalazzo was based upon the manager of the [[Charlottesville Fashion Square]], rechristened the "Fa-Square of Sho-Mall Region" in [[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu #4'']]. Chris's experiences in Fashion Square were documented earlier in the series when he battled the [[Jerkhief]] and got trolled hard by [[Hanna]], but ScotPalazzo himself would not be introduced until [[Sub-Episode 6]], when he expressed envy of Chris for his made-up TV show ''CWC's Backyard Safari''. Scot was clearly designed to resemble [[Wikipedia:List_of_Excel_Saga_characters#Il_Palazzo|Lord Il Palazzo]] from ''[[Excel Saga]]'', and he is depicted as a jaded misanthrope who blamed love itself for his mother's murder-suicide.

Whether or not the real Scot Palazzo suffered such a traumatic life as his comic counterpart, the fictional Scot remained one of the only villains in the series to give any kind of reason for his actions. [[Wes Iseli]] was motivated by jealousy, Mary gave reasons for her own war on love in [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu #10'']], [[Jason Kendrick Howell]]'s motivation was existentialism, and then there was Scot. Despite being one of the few villains to actually have motivation to do all the crazy super-villain shit the [[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens|PVCC]] gets up to however, he never actually ''does'' anything. In his debut appearance, he hires more [[jerkops]] to take down Chris, but he never gets any kind of [[comeuppance]] for this and he never fights any of the heroes. He cameos again in [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu #7'']] at the council of villains, and his character description says that he banned all [[virgin]]s from his region, but this is all he has ever been seen to do. In many ways, he is more like an actual manager than any of the other manajerks on this page.

His given motivation conflicts with later revelations that all PVCC members, including the manajerks, were really just brainwashed slaves of Mary Lee Walsh. [[Colossal Chan]]'s power supposedly undid all brainwashing, and Chris's statements on the subject claimed that all the manajerks were cleared of everything. Presumably this can be taken to mean that Scot was also a victim, and that his jaded personality was reverted to whatever he was like prior to Mary's effect.

===Turdijerk and Trebor Capman (Accomplice)===
[[File:Get-Tar Manajerks.jpg|thumb|Behold, the two most harmless villains in the series.]]

The last of the manajerks to be introduced, the duo of Turdijerk and his accomplice Trebor Capman first appeared in Sub-Episode 7 in [[Sonichu 4|''Sonichu #4'']], where they confronted Chris in the Get-Tar Region. The episode was based on an incident that occurred in real life at a newly opened [[Target]] store in Chris's area. Attempting to start fresh in new [[Attraction location|prowling grounds]], Chris planned to pay a single dollar to receive a soda at their snack bar and exploit their free refill policy to keep refilling that same soda over and over again while he spent the entire day sitting there doodling his shitty characters. This finally caught the attention of management, who eventually summoned officer [[Bagget]] to get him out of the store.

Unlike previous Manajerks, Chris doesn't give these two any special powers or armor, and the two aren't even named until their later cameo in [[Sonichu 7|''Sonichu'' #7]], when all of the Manajerks meet with Mary Lee Walsh at PVCC. In their initial appearance, the two manajerks walk up to Chris at his table and tell him that he was loitering and had to get out. Even in his idealized fantasy world where Chris whitewashes everything he does, the comic version of Chris is indeed loitering, and he also initially ignores the two managers trying to talk to him. Upon noticing them, he screams, and then somehow summons a tornado to blow them both away. It should be noted at this point that these two manajerks did not actually attack Chris, or even threaten him, meaning Chris just [[Chris and the law|assaulted two unarmed normal humans for telling him to leave their store]].

The names of the characters are puzzling. [[Trolls]] speculate that Trebor Capman might actually be an alias for someone called ''Robert'' Capman, given Chris's love for [[Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc|reversing names]], and while the origin of Turdijerk's name is somewhat more ambiguous, the two most common theories are that the name was either derived from a stereotype of the Indian accent, (as the character has a vaguely South Asian appearance and his real life counterpart is probably the same), or that the name "Turdijerk" is merely Chris's [[Random-access humor|juvenile sense of humor]] and a way to insult the real life manager by giving him a nickname that sounds like "turd". To racially theorize further, he possibly thought both, comparing the brown/Indian manager to a piece of shit.

==Gallery==
<center><gallery>
Image:Bmanajerk-oblivion.PNG|[[Soul Calibur|Video game recreation]].
Image:Manajerks.jpg|Getting decapitated only pissed him off.
Image:MSCsavestheday.png|Merried Seinor Comic, stopping the [[autistic]] wonder from [[Crystal Weston Chandler|procreating]].
</gallery></center>

==References==
<references/>

==See also==
*[[Fashion Square Mall|Fa-Square of Sho-Mall Region]]
*[[Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens]]
*[[Niggos]]
*[[Jerkops]]
*[[PVCCitizens]]
*[[Love Quest]]
*[[Walmart|Mal-Wart Region]]
*[[McDonald's|M-C-D-Ville]]
*[[Target|Get-Tar Region]]
*[[Amanda]]

{{Sonichu}}

[[Category:Manajerks]]
[[Category:Villains]]
[[Category:Real people who have appeared in Sonichu comics]]

United States of America

2012-04-20T09:06:36Z

IconOfEvi:

{{Quote|Okay, [[Honor roll|I don't know the words]], but I am being patriotic here!|Chris, forgetting the national anthem<ref>[[Red Letter CWC Certified Day]]</ref>}}
[[File:SonichuFlag.png|thumb|Christian's primary thoughts on the USA]]

[[Chris]] is a citizen of the '''United States of America''', a federal democratic republic in North America. The nation is considered the only remaining [[China|superpower]] since the end of the Cold War, and is a leading economic, political and cultural force in the world.

Chris's stance on the nation he lives in is inconsistent at best. While he claims to be a good citizen who loves and respects his country, his [[Twin Falling Towers|actions]] [[Calling Out|are]] [[Chris and Hypocrisy|often]] [[Chris and the Law|very obviously]] contrary to these claims.

==Politics==
[[File:Cwcflag1.png|thumb|Christian's DEEPER thoughts on the USA]]

At a glance, Chris's sense of politics seem very inconsistent; on some issues, he takes a very [[Wikipedia:Conservatism in the United States|conservative]] stance, on others a very [[Wikipedia:Liberalism in the United States|liberal]] one. While many people have an independent or bipartisan opinion, one has to realize the true nature of Chris's decision-making: that Chris doesn't favor what's good for the working class, or America, or the world, but rather what's good for Chris. As such, he's against gay marriage because he hates da [[homos]], and supported [[Barack Obama]] because he "saw himself in him".<ref>[[Mumble 7]]</ref><ref>[[IRC (18 December 2008)]]</ref>

Another political insight is the vague statement "I agree with gun control.",<ref>[[Mailbag 4]]</ref> despite Chris's numerous [[death threats]] and [[Sonichu Special 4|vigilante plans]] that would require a firearm. Soon after, he clarified that he supports abortion,<ref>[[Mailbag 20]]</ref> undoubtedly to show his appreciation for [[women's rights]].

Chris proclaims himself to be a "moderate."<ref>[[Common Questions]]</ref><ref>[[Mumble 1]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 5]]</ref><ref>[[Mumble 7]]</ref><ref>[[The Hook Cafe]]</ref> While typically this simply means not having extreme or overly partisan political beliefs, he takes this as a general-purpose response to all questions about politics, including ones that have no defined middle path. Nowhere is this more apparent than in the [[Mailbags]], where Chris will often dodge giving his opinion on issues ''every'' voter should have an opinion on, simply because ''he has no opinion'', though he did vote for [[Obama]] in 2008.

{{Quote|I disagree with more of the [[Wikipedia:Republican Party (US)|Republican]]'s views than the [[Wikipedia:Democratic Party (US)|Democrats]]. As for [[Wikipedia:Iraq War troop surge of 2007|the troop surge]], I don't really care much for war, especially if it's [[Death threats|over some petty disagreement]], but regardless of the surge's success or failure, [[Chris and English|I feel at least half of the sent troops should not be pulled back to stand their ground]].|Chris, [[Mailbag 15#Everything in moderation|Mailbag 15]]}}

Chris doesn't react well in situations where he absolutely has to make a choice ([[Julie]] or [[PSN]]? A question for the ages!<ref>[[Julie Reveals Herself]]</ref>), and seems easily persuaded on matters that he doesn't really have a stake on. As a result, he often comes across as a weathervane, just repeating whatever opinion has most recently lodged itself in his head. His changing opinion about Obama is a good example of this, as he has echoed the sentiments from [[Bob|his father]], a documentary, and then from his father again, adopting a positive and negative stance based on what he hears; he never really stops to make a summary and decide what points really matter.

==Understanding of government==
[[File:CWCVilleTrueFlag.png|thumb|What Christain's ideas actually amount to in [[reality]] ]]

Chris's grasp of how the government works, much like Chris's grasp on [[reality]] as a whole, is shaky at best. One of the most telling examples of this is his ignorant stance on taxation and [[Monthly tugboat|welfare]]. Because Chris is jobless, he pays no taxes. However, he still thinks of himself as a contributing member of society, because he pays [[Wikipedia:Sales taxes in the United States|sales taxes]] on the massive amount of crap he buys.

{{Quote|My spending that money ends up going to others who get such welfare and all as well.... I am sharing the wealth with others who are on that tugboat as well.|Chris, being wrong.<ref>[[Mailbag 34#In which Chris fails economics forever]]</ref>.}}

It's highly unlikely that Chris understands the massive discrepancy between the amount the federal government pays him and the amount he gives back via sales tax. Chris also fails to understand that sales taxes are collected by state and local governments, while his Social Security Disability check comes from the federal government.

Chris also seems to have difficulty understanding what the true purpose of government actually is. The U.S. government's duty is to follow the will of the majority while respecting the rights of the minority, to protect its citizens from danger, and to ensure the continued prosperity of the nation. Chris, however, would like it to become a force for social engineering that would make the most rabid totalitarian shudder. When asked hypothetical questions about what he would do if he were running things, he proposes bizarre sweeping laws that single out [[Homos|certain minorities]] and force individuals into relationships whether they want to be in one or not.

{{Quote|All Men and Women would be paired up in straight couples, leaving none alone; any remaining will be saved for upcoming men/women respectively. All gays would be reprogrammed and encouraged to be straight.|Chris<ref> [[Common Questions#28 December 2009]]</ref>.}}

The fact that this would not help the country at all, and would require the employment of a level state coercion unprecedented in human history, does not factor into Chris's thinking. By his logic, since he wants a [[sweetheart]], ''everybody'' must want a sweetheart, and if everybody wants a sweetheart, the government needs to make it happen.

Over the years, Chris has proposed a large number of laws, even sending letters to President [[Barack Obama]] demanding legislation against [[trolls]] and [[homos]]. This is completely useless for two reasons: one, the President of the United States has much more pressing concerns than making an insane manchild in Ruckersville, VA, happy, and two, the US President ''can't make laws''. (Separation of powers and checks and balances in government are concepts Chris has no time for — [[CWCville]], after all, is a hereditary dictatorship.)

Oddly, the closest analog for how Chris views his government is how Chris views his [[religion]]. He treats both the U.S. government and [[God]] as things that can be completely ignored unless he has a personal problem, at which point they should immediately step in and help. He believes that both have a deeply vested interest in himself, often at the expense of everybody else. God should damn [[Clyde Cash]], and the [[Wikipedia:FBI|FBI]] should arrest him. It doesn't matter that Clyde hasn't done anything the FBI would be terribly interested in; Chris is mad at him, and that's all that matters.

== Chris on patriotism ==
As established, Chris has a very [[naïve]] view of American politics and how the federal government operates. Despite these setbacks, Chris has developed a unique brand of patriotism he brings up quite often, usually either in [[Father Call|defense of his character]] or dehumanization of his [[Trolls|enemies]]. As a result, these stabs at [[Wikipedia:Jingoism|jingoism]] often feel forced or out of place. Chris has utilized this tactic in [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]], with the iconic "Clarksville Address":

{{quote|Yes, sir, my loving, caring [[Sweetheart]] and I have come to discuss the web page in question. We humbly request that it would be removed from the internet for good. For you are not just dragging Christian Weston Chandler's name in the mud, you also drag the American hopes and dreams and ideas of the majority of these great, humble United States of America along with him.|[[Sonichu]], on how insulting Chris means you hate America.<ref>[[Sonichu 8]]</ref>}}

[[Image:CWCVictoryForIvy.jpg|thumb|left|Chris bastardizing the American flag with his [[Chris and fashion|favorite shirt]]]]

Here, we can see the prime factor in Chris's logic. Namely, that [[Song of Christian|his problems are analogous with the problems of every American]]. Therefore, if [[ED]] satirizes him, they insult all U.S. citizens. This would become something of a recurring theme, with a later video claiming that any attack on Chris or [[CWCville|his fictional utopia]] was equivalent to mocking any 'C-ville' in America.<ref>[[Do Not Dis C Ville]]</ref> On a shallower level, it's an obvious ploy for sympathy, a facade of reasonable nationalism that aims to make him the 'good guy', and by extension, [[Jason]] the 'bad guy'. Thus, patriotic symbolism is thrown in, without really even considering whether or not it makes sense in context. Chris is patriotic simply because he believes that's what will win him [[Scale of Respect|respect]] and reprieve. It goes without saying that, while constantly implying that insults to him are also insults to America, Christian insults his home country far, far more by making connections between his aberrant behavior and Americans in general.

His attempts to prove his patriotism are undermined, however, by his tendency to [[Twin Falling Towers|mock national tragedies]] and his [[Chris and music|complete inability to sing even the most well-known patriotic songs.]] If anything, Chris's attempts to prove himself a "true American" end up having the opposite effect.

However, his bumbling enthusiasm isn't reserved for the USA alone. Like many Americans, Chris has developed a fake lineage of European ancestry, starting from [[Anne Boleyn]], a Queen of England who was executed in [[Pre-1980#Pre-1900|1536]]. This was almost instantly proven false when her ultimate descendant Queen Elizabeth I, also known as [[Virgin with rage|"The Virgin Queen"]], died in 1603, childless. Then Chris tried in vain to co-opt British, Scottish, and Irish national sentiment in his kilt-clad tirade against [[Surfshack Tito]]<ref>[[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!]]</ref> as a means of intimidation. Also, while not a standard country per se, he also evoked his relation to the Cherokee nation in his infamous [[War Paint Video]]. Finally, Chris attempts to use the fact that February 24 is Mexico's Flag Day to justify [[Christian Love Day|turning his own birthday into a holiday]]; an ''American'' holiday no less. Note that all of these cases, Chris's total ignorance of other nations means he [[fail]]s spectacularly at representing them and appearing patriotic.
{{-}}

==Chris for President?==
[[File:Idealworld.jpg|thumb|Christian's [[CWCville|promised America]] ]]

In an [[October 2010]] video, Chris outlined his actions for what he would do if elected President. He declared he would [[Chris and money|cut taxes in half, build "soup hotels", give senior citizens increased funds for medications and special services]], restrict guns to law enforcement personnel only, [[homos|allow gay marriage]], and [[TrollBusters|form a special police force that focuses entirely on capturing Internet trolls.]]<ref>[[A Public Announcement for Congress]]</ref>

Aside from his failure to deliver a good speech, this video also showcases his complete and utter ignorance of how government and taxes work. Building luxury hotels for the homeless<ref>[[Mailbag 18]]</ref> and increasing social security for [[Bob|senior citizens]] would cost a fortune to do, yet he also proposes cutting taxes in half, thus also reducing the amount of money the government can spend in half. Given that Chris probably has [[Honor Roll|no knowledge of economics]], he probably just assumes that money can be printed endlessly without fear of inflation.

Chris's restrictions of guns to professionals only is a blatant violation of the [[Wikipedia:Second Amendment to the United States Constitution|Second Amendment]], which explains the right of American citizens to own a wide array of weaponry can never be infringed. While there are certain restrictions on who can own a gun and what types, generally differing on the state level, a flat-out ban on weapons would be found unconstitutional. Then again, Chris isn't exactly big on [[Homos|respecting]] [[Alec Benson Leary|the]] [[Megan|rights]] [[Mailbag 31|of]] [[Niggos|others.]]

His departure from his previous stance on gay marriage is surprising, but then again, he was influenced by [[Jackie]] when he made the video. Despite his decree of equal rights, he does finish up his point by imploring [[Homos|gays]] to [[Sex tape|"keep it to yourselves in your room, just don't force it upon everybody."]] Meanwhile, straight couples can flaunt their heterosexuality to their heart's delight.

While taxes, government spending, gay marriage and gun control are all big issues, Chris finishes up his video by proposing his most important change: the establishment of a special [[TrollBusters]] unit of [[Chris and the law|law enforcement]], apparently dedicated to finding trolls who make fun of people online, and incarcerating them. While a cybercrimes unit already exists for the FBI, they spend their time pursuing real criminals like [[pedofork|pedophiles]] and scam artists, not people who make fun of [[Chris|retarded cry-babies]].

The fact that Chris has complained to law enforcement previously, but not seen them do anything about it, leads Chris to believe that it must not exist; [[ego|otherwise they would be spending all their resources tracking down the people who make fun of him]]. The fact that Chris is willing to suspend constitutional rights and spend countless millions to incarcerate people that make fun of him is proof that Chris is neither a Republican or Democrat, liberal or conservative, communist or fascist, extremist or moderate - or really any political stripe at all. His politics truly begin and end with him alone.

==Sources==
<references/>

==See also==
*''[[The Adventures of The American Rabbit]]''
*[[Chris and the law]]
*[[TrollBusters]]
*[[A Public Announcement for Congress]]
*[[Jason Kendrick Howell]]
*[[Sonichu 8]]

[[Category:Places]]

United States of America

2012-04-19T10:21:56Z

IconOfEvi: cleanings

{{Quote|Okay, [[Honor roll|I don't know the words]], but I am being patriotic here!|Chris, forgetting the national anthem<ref>[[Red Letter CWC Certified Day]]</ref>}}
[[File:SonichuFlag.png|thumb|Christian's primary thoughts on the U.S.]]

[[Chris]] is a citizen of the '''United States of America''', a federal democratic republic in North America. The nation is considered the only remaining [[China|superpower]] since the end of the Cold War, and is a leading economic, political and cultural force in the world.

Chris's stance on the nation he lives in is inconsistent at best. While he claims to be a good citizen who loves and respects his country, his [[Twin Falling Towers|actions]] [[Calling Out|are]] [[Chris and Hypocrisy|often]] [[Chris and the Law|very obviously]] contrary to these claims.

==Politics==
[[File:Cwcflag1.png|thumb|National flag of [[CWCville]].]]

At a glance, Chris's sense of politics seem very inconsistent; on some issues, he takes a very [[Wikipedia:Conservatism in the United States|conservative]] stance, on others a very [[Wikipedia:Liberalism in the United States|liberal]] one. While many people have an independent or bipartisan opinion, one has to realize the true nature of Chris's decision-making: that Chris doesn't favor what's good for the working class, or America, or the world, but rather what's good for Chris. As such, he's against gay marriage because he hates da [[homos]], and supported [[Barack Obama]] because he "saw himself in him".<ref>[[Mumble 7]]</ref><ref>[[IRC (18 December 2008)]]</ref>

Another political insight is the vague statement "I agree with gun control.",<ref>[[Mailbag 4]]</ref> despite Chris's numerous [[death threats]] and [[Sonichu Special 4|vigilante plans]] that would require a firearm. Soon after, he clarified that he supports abortion,<ref>[[Mailbag 20]]</ref> undoubtedly to show his appreciation for [[women's rights]].

Chris proclaims himself to be a "moderate."<ref>[[Common Questions]]</ref><ref>[[Mumble 1]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 5]]</ref><ref>[[Mumble 7]]</ref><ref>[[The Hook Cafe]]</ref> While typically this simply means not having extreme or overly partisan political beliefs, he takes this as a general-purpose response to all questions about politics, including ones that have no defined middle path. Nowhere is this more apparent than in the [[Mailbags]], where Chris will often dodge giving his opinion on issues ''every'' voter should have an opinion on, simply because ''he has no opinion'', though he did vote for [[Obama]] in 2008.

{{Quote|I disagree with more of the [[Wikipedia:Republican Party (US)|Republican]]'s views than the [[Wikipedia:Democratic Party (US)|Democrats]]. As for [[Wikipedia:Iraq War troop surge of 2007|the troop surge]], I don't really care much for war, especially if it's [[Death threats|over some petty disagreement]], but regardless of the surge's success or failure, [[Chris and English|I feel at least half of the sent troops should not be pulled back to stand their ground]].|Chris, [[Mailbag 15#Everything in moderation|Mailbag 15]]}}

Chris doesn't react well in situations where he absolutely has to make a choice ([[Julie]] or [[PSN]]? A question for the ages!<ref>[[Julie Reveals Herself]]</ref>), and seems easily persuaded on matters that he doesn't really have a stake on. As a result, he often comes across as a weathervane, just repeating whatever opinion has most recently lodged itself in his head. His changing opinion about Obama is a good example of this, as he has echoed the sentiments from [[Bob|his father]], a documentary, and then from his father again, adopting a positive and negative stance based on what he hears; he never really stops to make a summary and decide what points really matter.

==Understanding of government==
[[File:CWCVilleTrueFlag.png|thumb|America as understood by Chris.]]

Chris's grasp of how the government works, much like Chris's grasp on [[reality]] as a whole, is shaky at best. One of the most telling examples of this is his ignorant stance on taxation and [[Monthly tugboat|welfare]]. Because Chris is jobless, he pays no taxes. However, he still thinks of himself as a contributing member of society, because he pays [[Wikipedia:Sales taxes in the United States|sales taxes]] on the massive amount of crap he buys.

{{Quote|My spending that money ends up going to others who get such welfare and all as well.... I am sharing the wealth with others who are on that tugboat as well.|Chris, being wrong.<ref>[[Mailbag 34#In which Chris fails economics forever]]</ref>.}}

It's highly unlikely that Chris understands the massive discrepancy between the amount the federal government pays him and the amount he gives back via sales tax. Chris also fails to understand that sales taxes are collected by state and local governments, while his Social Security Disability check comes from the federal government.

Chris also seems to have difficulty understanding what the true purpose of government actually is. The U.S. government's duty is to follow the will of the majority while respecting the rights of the minority, to protect its citizens from danger, and to ensure the continued prosperity of the nation. Chris, however, would like it to become a force for social engineering that would make the most rabid totalitarian shudder. When asked hypothetical questions about what he would do if he were running things, he proposes bizarre sweeping laws that single out [[Homos|certain minorities]] and force individuals into relationships whether they want to be in one or not.

{{Quote|All Men and Women would be paired up in straight couples, leaving none alone; any remaining will be saved for upcoming men/women respectively. All gays would be reprogrammed and encouraged to be straight.|Chris<ref> [[Common Questions#28 December 2009]]</ref>.}}

The fact that this would not help the country at all, and would require the employment of a level state coercion unprecedented in human history, does not factor into Chris's thinking. By his logic, since he wants a [[sweetheart]], ''everybody'' must want a sweetheart, and if everybody wants a sweetheart, the government needs to make it happen.

Over the years, Chris has proposed a large number of laws, even sending letters to President [[Barack Obama]] demanding legislation against [[trolls]] and [[homos]]. This is completely useless for two reasons: one, the President of the United States has much more pressing concerns than making an insane manchild in Ruckersville, VA, happy, and two, the US President ''can't make laws''. (Separation of powers and checks and balances in government are concepts Chris has no time for — [[CWCville]], after all, is a hereditary dictatorship.)

Oddly, the closest analog for how Chris views his government is how Chris views his [[religion]]. He treats both the U.S. government and [[God]] as things that can be completely ignored unless he has a personal problem, at which point they should immediately step in and help. He believes that both have a deeply vested interest in himself, often at the expense of everybody else. God should damn [[Clyde Cash]], and the [[Wikipedia:FBI|FBI]] should arrest him. It doesn't matter that Clyde hasn't done anything the FBI would be terribly interested in; Chris is mad at him, and that's all that matters.

== Chris on patriotism ==
As established, Chris has a very [[naïve]] view of American politics and how the federal government operates. Despite these setbacks, Chris has developed a unique brand of patriotism he brings up quite often, usually either in [[Father Call|defense of his character]] or dehumanization of his [[Trolls|enemies]]. As a result, these stabs at [[Wikipedia:Jingoism|jingoism]] often feel forced or out of place. Chris has utilized this tactic in [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]], with the iconic "Clarksville Address":

{{quote|Yes, sir, my loving, caring [[Sweetheart]] and I have come to discuss the web page in question. We humbly request that it would be removed from the internet for good. For you are not just dragging Christian Weston Chandler's name in the mud, you also drag the American hopes and dreams and ideas of the majority of these great, humble United States of America along with him.|[[Sonichu]], on how insulting Chris means you hate America.<ref>[[Sonichu 8]]</ref>}}

[[Image:CWCVictoryForIvy.jpg|thumb|left|Chris bastardizing the American flag with his [[Chris and fashion|favorite shirt]]]]

Here, we can see the prime factor in Chris's logic. Namely, that [[Song of Christian|his problems are analogous with the problems of every American]]. Therefore, if [[ED]] satirizes him, they insult all U.S. citizens. This would become something of a recurring theme, with a later video claiming that any attack on Chris or [[CWCville|his fictional utopia]] was equivalent to mocking any 'C-ville' in America.<ref>[[Do Not Dis C Ville]]</ref> On a shallower level, it's an obvious ploy for sympathy, a facade of reasonable nationalism that aims to make him the 'good guy', and by extension, [[Jason]] the 'bad guy'. Thus, patriotic symbolism is thrown in, without really even considering whether or not it makes sense in context. Chris is patriotic simply because he believes that's what will win him [[Scale of Respect|respect]] and reprieve. It goes without saying that, while constantly implying that insults to him are also insults to America, Christian insults his home country far, far more by making connections between his aberrant behavior and Americans in general.

His attempts to prove his patriotism are undermined, however, by his tendency to [[Twin Falling Towers|mock national tragedies]] and his [[Chris and music|complete inability to sing even the most well-known patriotic songs.]] If anything, Chris's attempts to prove himself a "true American" end up having the opposite effect.

However, his bumbling enthusiasm isn't reserved for the USA alone. Like many Americans, Chris has developed a fake lineage of European ancestry, starting from [[Anne Boleyn]], a Queen of England who was executed in [[Pre-1980#Pre-1900|1536]]. This was almost instantly proven false when her ultimate descendant Queen Elizabeth I, also known as [[Virgin with rage|"The Virgin Queen"]], died in 1603, childless. Then Chris tried in vain to co-opt British, Scottish, and Irish national sentiment in his kilt-clad tirade against [[Surfshack Tito]]<ref>[[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!]]</ref> as a means of intimidation. Also, while not a standard country per se, he also evoked his relation to the Cherokee nation in his infamous [[War Paint Video]]. Finally, Chris attempts to use the fact that February 24 is Mexico's Flag Day to justify [[Christian Love Day|turning his own birthday into a holiday]]; an ''American'' holiday no less. Note that all of these cases, Chris's total ignorance of other nations means he [[fail]]s spectacularly at representing them and appearing patriotic.
{{-}}

==Chris for President?==
[[File:Idealworld.jpg|thumb|Chris's [[CWCville|ideal America]].]]

In an [[October 2010]] video, Chris outlined his actions for what he would do if elected President. He declared he would [[Chris and money|cut taxes in half, build "soup hotels", give senior citizens increased funds for medications and special services]], restrict guns to law enforcement personnel only, [[homos|allow gay marriage]], and [[TrollBusters|form a special police force that focuses entirely on capturing Internet trolls.]]<ref>[[A Public Announcement for Congress]]</ref>

Aside from his failure to deliver a good speech, this video also showcases his complete and utter ignorance of how government and taxes work. Building luxury hotels for the homeless<ref>[[Mailbag 18]]</ref> and increasing social security for [[Bob|senior citizens]] would cost a fortune to do, yet he also proposes cutting taxes in half, thus also reducing the amount of money the government can spend in half. Given that Chris probably has [[Honor Roll|no knowledge of economics]], he probably just assumes that money can be printed endlessly without fear of inflation.

Chris's restrictions of guns to professionals only is a blatant violation of the [[Wikipedia:Second Amendment to the United States Constitution|Second Amendment]], which explains the right of American citizens to own a wide array of weaponry can never be infringed. While there are certain restrictions on who can own a gun and what types, generally differing on the state level, a flat-out ban on weapons would be found unconstitutional. Then again, Chris isn't exactly big on [[Homos|respecting]] [[Alec Benson Leary|the]] [[Megan|rights]] [[Mailbag 31|of]] [[Niggos|others.]]

His departure from his previous stance on gay marriage is surprising, but then again, he was influenced by [[Jackie]] when he made the video. Despite his decree of equal rights, he does finish up his point by imploring [[Homos|gays]] to [[Sex tape|"keep it to yourselves in your room, just don't force it upon everybody."]] Meanwhile, straight couples can flaunt their heterosexuality to their heart's delight.

While taxes, government spending, gay marriage and gun control are all big issues, Chris finishes up his video by proposing his most important change: the establishment of a special [[TrollBusters]] unit of [[Chris and the law|law enforcement]], apparently dedicated to finding trolls who make fun of people online, and incarcerating them. While a cybercrimes unit already exists for the FBI, they spend their time pursuing real criminals like [[pedofork|pedophiles]] and scam artists, not people who make fun of [[Chris|retarded cry-babies]].

The fact that Chris has complained to law enforcement previously, but not seen them do anything about it, leads Chris to believe that it must not exist; [[ego|otherwise they would be spending all their resources tracking down the people who make fun of him]]. The fact that Chris is willing to suspend constitutional rights and spend countless millions to incarcerate people that make fun of him is proof that Chris is neither a Republican or Democrat, liberal or conservative, communist or fascist, extremist or moderate - or really any political stripe at all. His politics truly begin and end with him alone.

==Sources==
<references/>

==See also==
*''[[The Adventures of The American Rabbit]]''
*[[Chris and the law]]
*[[TrollBusters]]
*[[A Public Announcement for Congress]]
*[[Jason Kendrick Howell]]
*[[Sonichu 8]]

[[Category:Places]]

United States of America

2012-04-14T08:08:45Z

IconOfEvi: /* Chris for President? */

{{Quote|Okay, [[Honor roll|I don't know the words]], but I am being patriotic here!|Chris, forgetting the national anthem<ref>[[Red Letter CWC Certified Day]]</ref>}}
[[File:SonichuFlag.png|thumb|Christian's primary thoughts on the U.S.]]

[[Chris]] is a citizen of the '''United States of America''', a federal democratic republic in North America. The nation is considered the only remaining [[China|superpower]] since the end of the Cold War, and is a leading economic, political and cultural force in the world.

Chris's stance on the nation he lives in is inconsistent at best. While he claims to be a good citizen who loves and respects his country, his [[Twin Falling Towers|actions]] [[Calling Out|are]] [[Chris and Hypocrisy|often]] [[Chris and the Law|very obviously]] contrary to these claims.

==Politics==
[[File:Cwcflag1.png|thumb|National flag of [[CWCville]].]]

At a glance, Chris's sense of politics seem very inconsistent; on some issues, he takes a very [[Wikipedia:Conservatism in the United States|conservative]] stance, on others a very [[Wikipedia:Liberalism in the United States|liberal]] one. While many people have an independent or bipartisan opinion, one has to realize the true nature of Chris's decision-making: that Chris doesn't favor what's good for the working class, or America, or the world, but rather what's good for Chris. As such, he's against gay marriage because he hates da [[homos]], and supported [[Barack Obama]] because he "saw himself in him".<ref>[[Mumble 7]]</ref><ref>[[IRC (18 December 2008)]]</ref>

Another political insight is the vague statement "I agree with gun control.",<ref>[[Mailbag 4]]</ref> despite Chris's numerous [[death threats]] and [[Sonichu Special 4|vigilante plans]] that would require a firearm. Soon after, he clarified that he supports abortion,<ref>[[Mailbag 20]]</ref> undoubtedly to show his appreciation for [[women's rights]].

Chris proclaims himself to be a "moderate."<ref>[[Common Questions]]</ref><ref>[[Mumble 1]]</ref><ref>[[Mailbag 5]]</ref><ref>[[Mumble 7]]</ref><ref>[[The Hook Cafe]]</ref> While typically this simply means not having extreme or overly partisan political beliefs, he takes this as a general-purpose response to all questions about politics, including ones that have no defined middle path. Nowhere is this more apparent than in the [[Mailbags]], where Chris will often dodge giving his opinion on issues ''every'' voter should have an opinion on, simply because ''he has no opinion'', though he did vote for [[Obama]] in 2008.

{{Quote|I disagree with more of the [[Wikipedia:Republican Party (US)|Republican]]'s views than the [[Wikipedia:Democratic Party (US)|Democrats]]. As for [[Wikipedia:Iraq War troop surge of 2007|the troop surge]], I don't really care much for war, especially if it's [[Death threats|over some petty disagreement]], but regardless of the surge's success or failure, [[Chris and English|I feel at least half of the sent troops should not be pulled back to stand their ground]].|Chris, [[Mailbag 15#Everything in moderation|Mailbag 15]]}}

Chris doesn't react well in situations where he absolutely has to make a choice ([[Julie]] or [[PSN]]? A question for the ages!<ref>[[Julie Reveals Herself]]</ref>), and seems easily persuaded on matters that he doesn't really have a stake on. As a result, he often comes across as a weathervane, just repeating whatever opinion has most recently lodged itself in his head. His changing opinion about Obama is a good example of this, as he has echoed the sentiments from [[Bob|his father]], a documentary, and then from his father again, adopting a positive and negative stance based on what he hears; he never really stops to make a summary and decide what points really matter.

==Understanding of government==
[[File:CWCVilleTrueFlag.png|thumb|America as understood by Chris.]]

Chris's grasp of how the government works, much like Chris's grasp on [[reality]] as a whole, is shaky at best. One of the most telling examples of this is his ignorant stance on taxation and [[Monthly tugboat|welfare]]. Because Chris is jobless, he pays no taxes. However, he still thinks of himself as a contributing member of society, because he pays [[Wikipedia:Sales taxes in the United States|sales taxes]] on the massive amount of crap he buys.

{{Quote|My spending that money ends up going to others who get such welfare and all as well.... I am sharing the wealth with others who are on that tugboat as well.|Chris, being wrong.<ref>[[Mailbag 34#In which Chris fails economics forever]]</ref>.}}

It's highly unlikely that Chris understands the massive discrepancy between the amount the federal government pays him and the amount he gives back via sales tax. Chris also fails to understand that sales taxes are collected by state and local governments, while his Social Security Disability check comes from the federal government.

Chris also seems to have difficulty understanding what the true purpose of government actually is. The U.S. government's duty is to follow the will of the majority while respecting the rights of the minority, to protect its citizens from danger, and to ensure the continued prosperity of the nation. Chris, however, would like it to become a force for social engineering that would make the most rabid totalitarian shudder. When asked hypothetical questions about what he would do if he were running things, he proposes bizarre sweeping laws that single out [[Homos|certain minorities]] and force individuals into relationships whether they want to be in one or not.

{{Quote|All Men and Women would be paired up in straight couples, leaving none alone; any remaining will be saved for upcoming men/women respectively. All gays would be reprogrammed and encouraged to be straight.|Chris<ref> [[Common Questions#28 December 2009]]</ref>.}}

The fact that this would not help the country at all, and would require the employment of a level state coercion unprecedented in human history, does not factor into Chris's thinking. By his logic, since he wants a [[sweetheart]], ''everybody'' must want a sweetheart, and if everybody wants a sweetheart, the government needs to make it happen.

Over the years, Chris has proposed a large number of laws, even sending letters to President [[Barack Obama]] demanding legislation against [[trolls]] and [[homos]]. This is completely useless for two reasons: one, the President of the United States has much more pressing concerns than making an insane manchild in Ruckersville, VA, happy, and two, the US President ''can't make laws''. (Separation of powers and checks and balances in government are concepts Chris has no time for — [[CWCville]], after all, is a hereditary dictatorship.)

Oddly, the closest analog for how Chris views his government is how Chris views his [[religion]]. He treats both the U.S. government and [[God]] as things that can be completely ignored unless he has a personal problem, at which point they should immediately step in and help. He believes that both have a deeply vested interest in himself, often at the expense of everybody else. God should damn [[Clyde Cash]], and the [[Wikipedia:FBI|FBI]] should arrest him. It doesn't matter that Clyde hasn't done anything the FBI would be terribly interested in; Chris is mad at him, and that's all that matters.

== Chris on patriotism ==
As established, Chris has a very [[naïve]] view of American politics and how the federal government operates. Despite these setbacks, Chris has developed a unique brand of patriotism he brings up quite often, usually either in [[Father Call|defense of his character]] or dehumanization of his [[Trolls|enemies]]. As a result, these stabs at [[Wikipedia:Jingoism|jingoism]] often feel forced or out of place. Chris has utilized this tactic in [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]], with the iconic "Clarksville Address":

{{quote|Yes, sir, my loving, caring [[Sweetheart]] and I have come to discuss the web page in question. We humbly request that it would be removed from the internet for good. For you are not just dragging Christian Weston Chandler's name in the mud, you also drag the American hopes and dreams and ideas of the majority of these great, humble United States of America along with him.|[[Sonichu]], on how insulting Chris means you hate America.<ref>[[Sonichu 8]]</ref>}}

[[Image:CWCVictoryForIvy.jpg|thumb|left|Chris bastardizing the American flag with his [[Chris and fashion|favorite shirt]]]]

Here, we can see the prime factor in Chris's logic. Namely, that [[Song of Christian|his problems are analogous with the problems of every American]]. Therefore, if [[ED]] satirizes him, they insult all U.S. citizens. This would become something of a recurring theme, with a later video claiming that any attack on Chris or [[CWCville|his fictional utopia]] was equivalent to mocking any 'C-ville' in America.<ref>[[Do Not Dis C Ville]]</ref> On a shallower level, it's an obvious ploy for sympathy, a facade of reasonable nationalism that aims to make him the 'good guy', and by extension, [[Jason]] the 'bad guy'. Thus, patriotic symbolism is thrown in, without really even considering whether or not it makes sense in context. Chris is patriotic simply because he believes that's what will win him [[Scale of Respect|respect]] and reprieve. It goes without saying that, while constantly implying that insults to him are also insults to America, Christian insults his home country far, far more by making connections between his aberrant behavior and Americans in general.

His attempts to prove his patriotism are undermined, however, by his tendency to [[Twin Falling Towers|mock national tragedies]] and his [[Chris and music|complete inability to sing even the most well-known patriotic songs.]] If anything, Chris's attempts to prove himself a "true American" end up having the opposite effect.

However, his bumbling enthusiasm isn't reserved for the USA alone. Like many Americans, Chris has developed a fake lineage of European ancestry, starting from [[Anne Boleyn]], a Queen of England who was executed in [[Pre-1980#Pre-1900|1536]]. This was almost instantly proven false when her ultimate descendant Queen Elizabeth I, also known as [[Virgin with rage|"The Virgin Queen"]], died in 1603, childless. Then Chris tried in vain to co-opt British, Scottish, and Irish national sentiment in his kilt-clad tirade against [[Surfshack Tito]]<ref>[[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!]]</ref> as a means of intimidation. Also, while not a standard country per se, he also evoked his relation to the Cherokee nation in his infamous [[War Paint Video]]. Finally, Chris attempts to use the fact that February 24 is Mexico's Flag Day to justify [[Christian Love Day|turning his own birthday into a holiday]]; an ''American'' holiday no less. Note that all of these cases, Chris's total ignorance of other nations means he [[fail]]s spectacularly at representing them and appearing patriotic.
{{-}}

==Chris for President?==
[[File:Idealworld.jpg|thumb|Chris's [[CWCville|ideal America]].]]

In an [[October 2010]] video, Chris outlined his actions for what he would do if elected President. He declared he would [[Chris and money|cut taxes in half, build "soup hotels", give senior citizens increased funds for medications and special services]], restrict guns to law enforcement personnel only, [[homos|allow gay marriage]], and [[TrollBusters|form a special police force that focuses entirely on capturing Internet trolls.]]<ref>[[A Public Announcement for Congress]]</ref>

Aside from his failure to deliver a good speech, this video also showcases his complete and utter ignorance of how government and taxes work. Building luxury hotels for the homeless<ref>[[Mailbag 18]]</ref> and increasing social security for [[Bob|senior citizens]] would cost a fortune to do, yet he also proposes cutting taxes in half, thus also reducing the amount of money the government can spend in half. Given that Chris probably has [[Honor Roll|no knowledge of economics]], he probably just assumes that money can be printed endlessly without fear of inflation.

Chris's restrictions of guns to professionals only is a blatant violation of the [[Wikipedia:Second Amendment to the United States Constitution|Second Amendment]], which allows American citizens to own a wide array of weaponry. While there are certain restrictions on who can own a gun and what type, a flat-out ban on weapons for everyone would be found unconstitutional. Then again, Chris isn't exactly big on [[Homos|respecting]] [[Alec Benson Leary|the]] [[Megan|rights]] [[Mailbag 31|of]] [[Niggos|others.]]

His departure from his previous stance on gay marriage is surprising, but then again, he was influenced by [[Jackie]] when he made the video. Despite his decree of equal rights, he does finish up his point by imploring [[Homos|gays]] to [[Sex tape|"keep it to yourselves in your room, just don't force it upon everybody."]] Meanwhile, straight couples can flaunt their heterosexuality to their heart's delight.

While taxes, government spending, gay marriage and gun control are all big issues, Chris finishes up his video by proposing his most important change: the establishment of a special [[TrollBusters]] unit of [[Chris and the law|law enforcement]], apparently dedicated to finding trolls who make fun of people online, and incarcerating them. While a cybercrimes unit already exists for the FBI, they spend their time pursuing real criminals like [[pedofork|pedophiles]] and scam artists, not people who make fun of [[Chris|retarded inbred cry-babies]].

The fact that Chris has complained to law enforcement previously, but not seen them do anything about it, leads Chris to believe that it must not exist; [[ego|otherwise they would be spending all their resources tracking down the people who make fun of him]]. The fact that Chris is willing to suspend constitutional rights and spend countless millions to incarcerate people that make fun of him is proof that Chris is neither a Republican, Democrat, or moderate; he's more of a fascist.

==Sources==
<references/>

==See also==
*''[[The Adventures of The American Rabbit]]''
*[[Chris and the law]]
*[[TrollBusters]]
*[[A Public Announcement for Congress]]
*[[Jason Kendrick Howell]]
*[[Sonichu 8]]

[[Category:Places]]

File:Lovelymotherfuckingweather.jpg

2012-04-10T05:14:27Z

IconOfEvi:

[[Category:Art from Sonichu 10]]

DEM THONG STRAPS

File:RosechuNude7.jpg

2012-04-06T10:01:29Z

IconOfEvi:

[[Category:Rule 34]]

Suddenly, hair bangs!

i.e. tracing, again

File:TG10.jpg

2012-04-05T09:42:43Z

IconOfEvi:

Blue on black, tears on the river...

File:SchuComic9P20.jpg

2012-04-01T22:43:18Z

IconOfEvi:

Nauseating, with elaphantitis hands

Chris and race

2012-03-26T06:44:01Z

IconOfEvi: /* Parental influence */

[[Image:GrandWizards4Sonichu.jpg|thumb|250px|Chris approves as he attends a [[Gay4Sonichu|Klansmen 4 Sonichu]] meetup]]
[[File:Niggo.jpg|thumb|250px|"Oh yeah, he's also Old Fashioned."]]

[[Christian Weston Chandler]]'s '''racist tendencies''' can be traced at least partially to his Southern [[USA|U.S.]] heritage, but certain other factors seem to imply that the rest of his worldview on race comes from stereotypes depicted by popular culture. In some cases, however, Chris seems to be completely unfamiliar with even the stereotypes, opting to make up a bunch of bullshit off the top of his head.

==African Americans==
{{main|Niggos}}

Chris demonstrates many instances of intolerance and racism, both intentional and unintentional. His racism comes from several sources: [[Bob Chandler|his father]], his isolated formative years, television, and his complete ignorance of everything that isn't him. Black people, in particular, are a common target for his xenophobia, hence his use of the words "nigger" and "niggos."

==Asians==
In the [[Sonichu (comic)|comics]], Chris portrays [[Punchy Sonichu]] as a [[CWC Fighter|kung fu]] master with [[Wikipedia:Epicanthic fold|slanty eyes]], raised in a dojo. When a fan criticized this stereotyping, Chris claimed that Punchy was "NOT of Asian origin."<ref>[[Mailbag 6]]</ref> Outside of the comic, Chris also misattributes the origin of kung fu to Japan, when in actuality it comes from [[China]]. He does a racist impression of a Chinese person, and claims Japanese and Chinese people sound the same.<ref>[[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3.5]]</ref> In a [[Katie Bay E-mails|leaked series of e-mails]], it is shown that Chris simply does not seem to know that China and Japan are not the same, as he calls the Japanese account Chinese, failing to realize that they are separate countries with different languages, writing systems and currencies.

In his real-life dealings, Chris seems to have a positive or at least neutral view toward Asians. He has stated that he would not exclude Asian women from his [[Love Quest]], and at one point [[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#Eating Spaghetti (36:49 - 38:54)|believed Emily to be part-Asian]]. However, he also said that meeting her was like having a [[Sailor Moon|''Pretty Girl Sailor Moon'']] character leap out of his television; a real Asian woman probably wouldn't be pleased to be imagined as animu wank fodder.

Chris also mentioned receiving a graduation gift from Reverend Shin C. Kang (sp?) of Korean Hope Presbyterian Church of Richmond in the [[church audio]].<ref>[http://www.taxexemptworld.com/organizations/chesterfield-county-va-virginia.asp?spg=2]</ref>

[[Manajerks|"Turdijerk"]] from "Off-Target" has a vaguely South Asian appearance and the name may also be based on a stereotype of an Indian accent.

===Ching Chong===
In the [[Captain's Log, Stardate April 28th, 2009]], Chris presents us [[Chris and remorse|sincere apologies]] for having scared a small Chinese girl that [[Ivy]] tutored in art. The child, known only as '''Ching Chong''' (程鍾 ''Chéng Zhong'') is now traumatized due to her witnessing a video of Chris drinking his own [[semen|"navy"]] while innocently browsing [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]. Chris never made a follow-up on the girl and never asked why her name was a known racial slur towards ethnic Asian communities. In the [[Wedding Comic]], Ching Chong is seen [[List of Sonichu characters#Ching Chong|as a flower girl]].

==Native Americans==
{{main|Cherokian Clan}}
[[Image:02-Cheroki-Chan Card2.jpg|thumb|left| This has something to do with Native Americans. No, really.]]
As stated in the main article, despite claiming to have at least one [[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan|Cherokee ancestor]], Chris is completely ignorant of Native American culture. However, unlike other minorities, Chris's opinions and representation of Native Americans are a misguided expression of "pride" for his "heritage".

In [[Sonichu 2|''Sonichu'' #2]]: [[Sonichu 2#Episode 7: Sonichu in "Anchuent Prophecy"|Episode 7]], Chris tries to tie in his "[[Cherokian]]" heritage with ''Sonichu'' lore. He depicts [[Wikipedia:Cherokee|Cherokee]] characters in his work as white-skinned and blue-eyed, and wearing Ancient Roman-style armor ([[Wikipedia:Joseph Smith, Jr|Joseph Smith]] would be proud). The [[Wasabi Clan]] also bear no resemblance to Native Americans.

Chris has also embodied his ignorance of Native American culture in a physical form. For a brief time, Chris blurred his gender roles and began to collect and customize "[[My Little Pony]]" dolls. One of the dolls he crafted was the infamous "Cheroki-Chan", a Native American pony. While there is nothing overtly racist about this abomination, it is probably not how Native Americans want to be represented. In the end Cheroki-Chan is just another Mary Sue for Chris, and pales in comparison to Chris's most infamous portrayal of Native Americans.

In a shocking display of ignorance, Chris attempted to emulate what he perceives as "Native American culture" in a [[War Paint Video]]. In this video Chris wears water-washable paint (and a "[[muscle bra]]") and wields a gun in an attempt to frighten trolls into submission. This video was inevitable [[fail]] because true Cherokee wore vests and used only bows and arrows, which Chris [[I AM STRONG|lacks the strength]] to use.

==Jews==
{{quote|I hope that God will forgive you for being so heartless and cruel Michael Snyder!... JEW!|[[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|Chris]]}}
In "[[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas]]", Chris describes how Jews living in [[CWCville]] celebrate [[Wikipedia:Hanukkah|Hanukkah]]. On December 12, members of the CWCville Jewish diaspora set up "Menorah candles" (the "Haunaka" Menorah candelabrum has seven candles in it, while the traditional menorah used on Hanukkah IRL, called a ''Hanukkiah'', has nine) instead of Christmas Trees, with [[Wikipedia:dreidel|dreidels]] lying under them. Since the candle-related symbolism is very much present in the RL Hanukkah rituals, it's in good taste to give CWCville Jews anything candle-related as a gift. e.g., when Sonichu's daughter [[Cerah Rosey]] baked cookies for her friends, she decided to make her Jewish friend Kevin a candle-shaped one. Because Jews surely love to be distinguished from other people on any occasions based solely on their faith, and would take deep offense in receiving a normal nothing-special-shaped cookie as a gift! Also, Hanukkah is the only Jewish holiday, and so candles (especially single ones not on a Menorah) are super-important to Jews!

Cerah also makes the flavor vanilla, just in case poor Kevin had any nut/chocolate allergies. Instead of simply ''asking'' if he's allergic, she just assumes it. Because Jews are Melvins with many allergies, you see.

In fact, there actually is a tradition of eating specially ''fried'' foods (latke and sufganiyah) on Hanukkah, and vanilla is one of the allowed ingredients used in making them. Not that Chris knows anything about this, mind you.

Near the beginning of Chris's [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean|latest]] (unsuccessful) attempt to be unbanned from the [[The GAMe PLACe]], he casually pointed out that Michael Snyder was probably Jewish (although "Snyder" is a very common German last name, meaning "to cut"), using his last name as a point of reference. Of course with Chris being the [[slow-in-the-mind|idiot]] he is, it ended with him angrily calling Snyder a Jew. Given the use of the word as an insult, and Chris using it in context with other words denoting a type of sin it shows just how tolerant he is of other religions. In a later video ([[100 2178]]), Chris appears to restrain himself from calling Snyder a "greedy Jew".

If Chris's antisemitism was veiled before, it becomes extremely apparent in an email he sent to [[Katie Bay E-mails 2|Katie Bay while impersonating Samantha Thaddeus]]. While talking about Michael Snyder, he refers to him as a "son of a bitch Jew" and a "pigheaded, stubborn Jew".

==Hispanics==
[[Image:332-Espanolic.jpg|thumb|left|Espanolic, the Spanish Pokémon]]

Aside from his rather tenuous grasp on the [[Spanish]] language, Chris has created a somewhat racist caricature in the form of [[List of cards from The Wall of Originals|Espanolic]]. It's a Grass-type [[Pokémon]] that resembles an anthropomorphized [[Wikipedia:Sombrero|sombrero]] in front of what appears to be the flag of [[Wikipedia:Bolivia|Bolivia]] or [[Wikipedia:Ghana|Ghana]], and its main attack is confusing its enemies with its "strange language". Its evolved form, Vegaton, has an attack called "[[Wikipedia:Spanish fly|Spanish Fly]]", that puts its enemies to sleep.

Hilariously enough, [[Nintendo]] would later create similar Pokémon named Lombre and Ludicolo, which, despite being obvious stereotypes, were handled far more tactfully than Chris could hope to do.

So far, the only Hispanic character in the comics is [[Heather Iglesias]], the [[Homos|lesbian]] nanny of [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Children]]. Chris is probably trying to be inclusive here, but he isn't creative or intelligent enough to think of anything besides a stereotypical occupation for Hispanic women.

It may also be notable that oftentimes, Chris refers to Hispanic people as being "Spanish". While not totally inaccurate, the word "Spanish" is usually reserved for people actually from Spain, whereas "Hispanic" is used for peoples from countries that predominately speak Spanish (a good comparison would be referring to people from Ireland or Scotland as "English").

Chris has shown in the past a willingness to [[Joshua Martinez|befriend]] and [[Lori Lopez|date]] Hispanics.

==Parental influence==
[[Image:GrandWizardBob.jpg|thumb|right|Bob telling Chris the Barack Obama joke.]]

Given that his father [[Bob Chandler]] grew up in the southern [[United States]] before the civil rights movement and [[Prank_calls#ThePCassassins_-_Call_Bobby_Chandler|has claimed to have friends in the Ku Klux Klan and may be a member himself]], it's safe to assume that some of his prejudices passed on to Chris. It is possible Bob also disliked that Chris's high school basketball team had only three white players and the two [[Wikipedia:waterboy|waterboys]] were both white. In [[2008]], Bob said that, if elected president, [[Barack Obama]] would "paint the White House black." In a [[Prank_calls#Call_Bobby_Chandler|2010 prank call]], Bob implied that he was a Ku Klux Klan member, and said ''"I’ve seen crosses burning, fella. I've seen 'em. And you don’t wanna see it."'' Of course, he could just be referrings to the time then, where many people not participating would have seen cross burnings or lynchings, regardless.

==Chris and stereotypes==
Chris's views of cultures besides Southern white Christians can also be traced to the television he watches. The typical [[Adult Swim]] cartoon includes gratuitous use of stereotype-based humor. Chris takes [[Don't Trust Any Homos Over There|''The Boondocks'']]' satire of black stereotypes at face value. He also portrays nearly every person of African descent that appears in ''Sonichu'' with bald heads and either [[wikipedia:Golliwogg|round, bulging eyes]] or glasses that resemble such. Finally, he does an impression of the stereotypical black accent, which he apparently confuses with the Jamaican accent, in [[Mumble 4]].

His exposure to anime fuels his misguided views on East Asians. Asians, in his views, [[Excel Saga|excel at]] [[random-access humor]] and [[Punchy|martial arts]].

Chris, despite claiming [[Cherokee]] ancestry, doesn't seem to know what a Native American even looks like, as he portrays the [[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan]] as an overtly European person wearing Greco-Roman garb. He also tramples all over their actual rituals and culture simply to implement the [[Anchuent Prophecy]] into his comic. Chris most likely has no idea what kind of rituals took place in Native American culture. If he did, he would know that some tribes slit their [[duck|cocks]] to please the gods. I bet he doesn't want to be Native American anymore. Or does he?

==Not a racist?==
[[Image:ECP 00024.jpg|thumb|left|Chris being a [[niggo|wiggo]].]]
{{quote|And I am NOT racist, and I like Jews|Chris, in response to a [[Mailbag_6#Rejected_Mailbag|rejected mailbag]] email}}
Chris does not want to be considered a racist. He claims to respect blacks as equals, saying that in CWCville [[Fail|"they can even vote"]], but at best he merely tolerates their existence so long as they stay away from him. Or if they can [[Reggie Fils-Aimé|help him get his inane and idiotic video game made]]. However, he does genuinely like two black people: [[My big 18th party (story)|Kenan & Kel]].

Also, Chris has probably never been told that the voice of [[Sonic]] in the animated series that he loves so much was [[Wikipedia:Jaleel White|Jaleel White]], a [[Niggos|black]] man. If someone told him this, he would probably deny it. However, given that Chris managed to get [[LittleBigPlanet|respect]] for [[Homos|Stephen Fry]]...

He did mention more than once that the reason he doesn't want black girls (but any other race is okay) is because he thinks God told him that his future daughter Crystal must be white, too. (In an [[IRC (17 December 2008)|IRC]], Chris said he has no problem with dating an Asian. Later, in [[Mailbag 35]], he wrote he would date "Asian, Native or Hispanic women, as well as women of all other countries" except the ones being black because he's "Old Fashioned".)

Realistically, Chris is not considered a white supremacist type of racist but more of a xenophobic one. In other words, he's afraid of ethnic groups he's not familiar with. Like most things in his life, [[Chris and reality|Chris has no real knowledge and bases everything off what he's seen on TV]]. Chris's perception of minorities is only what the TV shows him, since encountering them in real life is something that rarely occurs.

===Improved race relations?===
[[Image:CWCRockin4Way.jpg|thumb|left|Chris does not judge a woman by the color of her skin but by the size of her tits.]]

An [[CWCRockin4Way.jpg|image]] leaked on 26 [[September 2009]] showing Chris having sex with three young ladies, including an African American woman. In the [[Captain's Log, Stardate October 10th, 2009|Captain's Log of 10 October 2009]], Chris clarified that the woman with whom he's performing sexual intercourse is "Half And Half" (mixed ancestry). This proves to us that, even if he's ready to touch the [[china|genitals]] of a black woman, he is unable to imagine the sexual intercourse with someone not sharing white ancestry. In fact, there's evidence that [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|shared ancestry may be a turn-on for Chris.]]

It seems that the futility of his [[love quest]] has lead Chris to lower his ridiculously high standards even further, as he did with fat chicks (which he dropped for [[Sarah Jackson]]), and red heads (as he did with [[Ivy]]).

===Nope, no improved race relations===
[[Image:Chrishunwessonkramer.jpg|thumb|"Fitty years ago you'da been hung from a damn dirty tree!"]]

This just in: Chris is a bigot. If anyone had any misconceptions that Chris was anything short of the most horrible person on earth, he ended Sonichu Day by calling Tito the N-word in "[[Chris Drops the N-Bomb]]" and in the [[Surfshack Tito E-mails]], making him an official racist. (The repercussions of this event included [[Jack Thaddeus]] removing his ads from CWCipedia and [[Mao]] taking over the site for a short time, leading to a massive amount of vandalism.) Soon, Chris also called Michael Snyder a Jew (in a derogatory way) in [[Michael Snyder is ColdHearted and Mean]]. He later performed [[Song for Jackie.MOV|a song in ''blackface'']] for his sweetheart [[Jackie]]. {{clear}}

==Minority characters in ''Sonichu''==
*[[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas|Kevin]] (Jewish, good, never seen)
*[[Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan]] (<s>Paleface</s> Native American, lawful good)
*[[Wes Iseli#Wasabi Rival|Wasabi Rival]] (<s>Caucasian</s> Native American, evil)
*[[Sarah Nicole Hammer#Queen of the Cherokian Clan|Queen of the Cherokian Clan]] - (Native American, good, probably the whitest of all Native American characters in the comics as she's not only blue eyed but also blonde)
*[[B-Manajerk]] (black, evil)
** Occasionally other [[Jerkop]]s are shown to be black as well. No other minorities are apparent.
*[[Barack Obama]] (half black)
*[[Blake]] (black, evil turned good)
*[[CADD Chef]] (black, evil)
*[[Florance Fisher]] (black, good)
*[[Jerkhief]] (black, lawful evil)
*[[Punchy]] (Chinese-Japanese, good)
*[[Silvana]] (black, evil [said to turn good])
*[[Turdijerk]] (Asian?, drawn with tan skin, evil)
*[[Constables Gerald Grant and Louis Perez|Constable Louis Perez]] (black, TRUE and HONEST police officers)
*[[Inos]] (black, [[tobacky]] smoker)
*[[Heather Iglesias]] (Hispanic, lesbian, good, never seen)
*[[List of Sonichu characters#Dr. Bill Schwartz (Bill the Scientist)|Bill Schwartz]] (possibly Jewish, worked for [[Giovanni]] but later on changed sides)
*[[List of Sonichu characters#Ching Chong|Ching Chong]] (Asian, appeared in the [[Wedding Comic]] as a flower girl)
*PHI Spring Break reporter (Black, appears in [[Sonichu 8|''Sonichu'' #8]]) - despite only appearing in one panel, Chris manages to make her into a stereotype, addressing the audience as "Sistas and brothas."

In the [[Mailbag]], when Chris is confronted about the lack of minorities in his comic he claims that all of his [[Electric Hedgehog Pokémon]] are considered "minorities" in CWCville, implying that he completely missed the point of the question.

==Sources==
<references/>
{{Chris and}}

User:IconOfEvi

2011-11-27T12:26:02Z

IconOfEvi:

In short, a guy from Wisconsin. Am one of the hated long time observers, first time postars.

After seeing the fail that is Chris, my doldrums went away.

When I get better at art, I'll work on an idea I've been nursing - "The Legend Of Inos", a tale which will show that behind the whacked out facade, he has lead a truly incredible life, filled with war, hate, love, and in the end, a coming to peace with himself.

Another idea is a story of Allison Amber attempting a coup, but failing, and Amber realizing that the tyranny of CWCville cannot be saved. It can only be purged.

A note - I finally found the page with all the UserBoxes. Damn was it tucked away.

Infos:

Me:
{{Americunt}}
{{JERK}}
{{Asian}}
{{Straight}}
{{Virgin with rage}}

CWCki Infos:
{{Hikikomori}}
{{Warrior}}
{{VivianGee}}

Misc:
{{EDUser}}
{{MartialArtist}}

File:RainbowChrisBeforeAfter.jpg

2011-10-04T21:09:36Z

IconOfEvi:

[[Category:Art from Sonichu 1]]

Blatant expample of Chris retconning the continuity.

Its still pretty gay

Encyclopedia Dramatica

2011-07-29T21:20:33Z

IconOfEvi:

{{protip|Stop trying to put mentions of ed.ch on this page. Only use it to replace broken ed.com links.}}
'''Encyclopedia Dramatica''' (aka '''ED'''), replaced by [http://ohinternet.com/ Oh Internet], was home to the Chris-chan page that introduced Chris to the world at large and made him a popular target for [[trolling]].
==Chris on ED==

Chris has denounced the ED page in several of his videos, claiming it is filled with "VICIOUS [[lies|LIES]] AND SLANDER."

After a considerable amount of trolling and bitching and uploading hideous pornographic images, including the disastrous [[ShecameforCWC.JPG]], Chris posted this gem on the ED talk page:

{{quotebox|I AM ADDING THE [[Rule 34|POSITIVITY]] THIS HELL-HOLE OF A WEBSITE NEEDS; you just do not appreciate the POSITIVITY I AM ADDING TO THE PAGE. What I am doing is a STAND against OFFENSIVE, UNNATURAL, UNREQUIRED [[Pickle|Additions]] to ANY Female Image. What I am doing is a STAND for EVERY SINGLE WOMAN Everywhere, because NO WOMAN would EVER want such a Horrific Twist of Fate. What I am doing is a STAND against the VERY THING that is NOT FUNNY AT ALL!!!!!!!

So, Draw Breasts, [[china|Vaginas]], Uterus, Ovaries and the God-Given Eggs within them, you [[Duck|Two-Inch Short]] [[Pickle|Dick-HEADS!!!!!!!!]]

Sincerely, Christian Weston Chandler, A Man For The Women, For the [[Women's Rights]], For the Women's Justice, For the Women's Peace.

P.S. [[Chris and hypocrisy|Grow a BACKBONE and GO ASK WOMEN OUT AS WELL, YOU TROLLS!]]}}

Chris then returned, admitting defeat after his tard rage:

{{quotebox|Months ago, I have found from this page being the first of a number hate against me, Christian Weston Chandler. *[[sigh]]* Among the number of you all, my name has been dragged through the mud, my e-mail and MySpace have been hacked for the e-mail information and random information that have been twisted into mockery of [[obesity|my person]], [[Chris and sex|my integrity]], [[List of Chris's lies|my honesty]], [[Ryan Cash|my compassion]], [[heart level|my heart]], [[Chris and religion|my soul]], [[autism|my being]]. Not only that, but the names of my two best gal-pals, [[Megan Schroeder]] and [[Anna McLerran]], and my Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon, [[Sonichu]] and [[Rosechu]], have also been dragged through the mud of mockery along with mine. Not only were [[heart level|my feelings were hurt greatly]], but also those of [[Megan]] and [[Anna]], and a number of my acquaintances within my small social circle were shocked and terrified that such [[trolls|cruelty]], such [[pickle|mockery]], such [[homos|hatred]] was built from the number of those who have added more and more to this disgrace of a description of my [[autism|being]].

For a while, I was angry and enraged, and I shoved information and drawings regretfully drawn beyond my personal boundries down the throat of the webmasters of the page, in attempt to kill the hype and hatred against me. But No More, I give up on trying to edit the page to be more positive, or to delete the page altogether.

But I have ONE Question, that I put unto you all, the individuals who have taken part in creating this web page, and I would appreciate an Open, Detailed and Honest Answer from each of you in simple e-mails or reply on this discussion page.

[[Frequently Asked Questions|Why do you hate me so much?]]

What did I do against you to cause the hatred against me? What physical or emotional harm have I ensued unto you? Why do you hate me for being myself in this world full of people who can't help but be themselves? I've had nothing against any of you. I don't even know any of you personally, as far as I know. I have nothing that any of you have already, so Why?

I leave you with that to ponder and ponder again over.

Sincerely;

Christian Weston Chandler.}}

After the late summer of [[2008]], Chris largely gave up on direct involvement with ED. Around the spring of [[2009]], he may have posted one or two comments on the ED talk page referring to [[Clyde Cash]], however. The first is below. It was deleted fairly quickly.

{{quotebox|I have learned that there was a connection between her and a state in Washington where some of you have been lurking, and that she was not found in any public records. It took me a week to recover from the [[heart level|crestfallen emotions]], but I am moving on with my life.

Also, you'll have to catch me IRL ONLY to [[troll]] me any further. [[fangs|Do you dare?]]

Peace-Out, Christian Weston Chandler

--ChrisChanSonichu 22:54, 14 May 2009 (UTC)}}

There was some dispute over it actually being Chris until he himself confirmed it in the post that followed:

{{quotebox|Hey, [[Clyde Cash|CLYDE]], you JERK. I said "IN REAL LIFE", not [[PS3|Playstation]]. Also, why don't you be the man you CLAIM to be and face me yourself? You keep sending out your [[Fail|prawns]] to do your dirty work, you coward. >:-(

Christian C.}}

According to Clyde, the above entry was deleted after roughly a minute, probably due to Chris realizing that if he were to ever arrange to meet Clyde, he'd only send his parents anyway.

==ED on Chris, his article, and his article's talk page==

[[Image:Drycow.PNG|thumb|Uploaded 12 December 2008, before the new comic, [[Miyamoto]] saga, and [[BlueSpike]] saga]]

For several months prior to the events of the [[BlueSpike]] saga in early 2009, many thought that Chris had dried up, that Chris could go no further. Furthermore, the [[Blanca Weiss#FCTC|FCTC]]'s posting of new pics of Chris's bent [[duck]] in December 2008 prompted an ED admin to lock the talk page and demand satisfaction:

{{quote|MINE: What this talkpage is. If you guys continue your faggotry after this protection expires today I will lock it down longer, and then eventually permanently.| Arguecat3, now former ED sysop, 4 December 2008}}

{{quote|I say we just delete it. Along with the archives | Zaiger, now former ED sysop, 5 December 2008}}

{{quote|Fuck this article and it's talk page. Stupid discussions unrelated to upkeep and editing are the only thing keeping this shit interesting. You guys take this shit WAY to srsly. Find another retard to stalk fgts|Zaiger, now former ED sysop, 10 December 2008}}

==1 April 2009==

[[Image:ED April Fools' 2009.PNG|left|thumb|Screenshot of ED's front page.]]
[[Image:Chris-chan ED April Fools' 2009.PNG|thumb|Screenshot of the article.]]

On April Fools' Day 2009, the Chris-chan article was taken down and replaced with a message.

{{quote|This afternoon, we at Encyclopædia Dramatica have independently decided to remove the Chris-chan article about Christian W. Chandler from our site. We have also removed all references that slander, vilify, demean, or are found to be overly offensive. In plain terms, this ordeal has gone on far too long and gotten far out of hand. We have unfairly focused on him to the point of intruding in his private life and causing him great personal grief, which no person should ever have to endure. This behavior is not in line with our site goals, and we never wanted something like this. Still, we must take complete responsibility for all our actions, both public and private. And that is why we are speaking to you today. But we say to you now that at no time did we ask anyone to lie, hide, or destroy evidence, or to take any other unlawful action.

We know that his public comments and his silence about this matter gave a false impression. We misled people, including even his family. We deeply regret that. We can only tell you we were motivated by many factors. First, by a desire to protect himself from the embarrassment of his own conduct.

He was also very concerned about protecting his family. The investigation moved on to his family and friends, then into his private life. And now the investigation itself is under investigation.

This has gone on too long, cost too much, and hurt too many innocent people.

Regardless of any public pressure to reinstate the article, it must be stressed that our intrusion on Chris' private life will cease, and we intend to reclaim his family life for his family. Even internet celebrities have private lives. It is time to stop the pursuit of personal destruction and the prying into private lives and get on with our national life. Our website has been distracted by this matter for too long, and we take responsibility for our part in all of this. That is all we can do.

Now it is time -- in fact, it is past time to move on. We have important work to do -- real opportunities to seize, real problems to solve, real matters to face.

And so tonight, we ask you to turn away from the spectacle of the past two years, as we return our attention to all the challenges and all the promise of the next century.

Thank you. And good night.|ED, in a rare case of moralfaggotry.}}

Not surprisingly, the page was put back up on 2 April.

==Chris's use of Encyclopedia Dramatica==

''See also [[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica]]''

Chris tried to use ED to muster his personal army to go after [[Joshua Martinez]]. Obviously, nobody did what he asked. <ref><s>http://encyclopediadramatica.com/index.php?title=Chris-chan&oldid=1997409947</s></ref> He also tried to create a page on ED for his "CCWC's Fanart of Horrors" (see: [[troll]] art), but a sysop immediately caught it and redirected it to an anti-Semitic template.

==Chris and ED==

{{quote|I do think it is a little behind [[CWCki|cwcwiki]] [sic] on a few things, though, but that is to be expected.|[[Jason Kendrick Howell]] on the ED article today<ref><s>http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Chris-chan/JKH_Interview</s></ref>}}

For a while, the ED page was crammed with misinformation (such as Chris attempting to molest [[Patti]], or the idea that Ivy was really [[Kimmi|the blowup doll]]), but was cleaned out various times.

Trolls and general observers of Chris have since turned to [[CWCki]] to get a general picture of Chris that is less biased than ED (emphasis on "less"), and TV Tropes describes CWCki as being "''more accurate and slightly more SFW''" than ED.<ref>http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Sonichu</ref>

As for Chris himself, the ED page STILL bothered him. An [[Chris chan (CWCipedia)|entire page]] of Chris's website, established in December 2009 and updated afterward, is dedicated to "correcting" the evil ED article with his own True and Honest take on the situation. Naturally, it's all about how Chris isn't remotely responsible for anything he has done wrong, and how it's all the fault of his [[autism]] or those DANG DIRTY TROLLS.

==Oh Internet!==
On 14 April 2011, ED was redirected to [http://ohinternet.com/ Oh Internet!], a more safe-for-work wiki in an attempt to achieve the site revenue required to stay online. Needless to say, summaries of [http://ohinternet.com/Chris-chan Chris] and [http://ohinternet.com/Sonichu Sonichu] are available here.

==ED Isn't Dead!==
EncyclopediaDramatica is still alive after all. People would know this if they just googled.

The Chris-chan page has been cleaned up and updated too! [http://encyclopediadramatica.ch/Chris-chan Head on over!]

==Sources==
<references/>

==See also==

*[[Chris-Chan (CWCipedia)]]
*[[List of Christian's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica]]
*[[You know what, I HATE ME TOO!!!]]
*[[4-cent garbage]]
*[[Chris-chan (forum)]]
*[[Christian's sex joke]]
*[[User:Lime/Sonichu TV Tropes Article|TVTropes]] - The original article, before it was locked and edited.

==External links==
*[http://www.mediafire.com/?6m7hk01609e4e7k Google Cache of Chris's ED article]
*[http://encyclopediadramatica.ch/Chris-chan Archive of Chris's page on the "new" ED]
*<s>[http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Chris-chan The True and Honest "Chris-chan" article]</s>
*<s>[http://encyclopediadramatica.com/User:Reldnahc Chris's ED account]</s>
*[http://ohinternet.com/Chris-chan Oh Internet! article (SFW!)]

[[Category:Trolling]]
[[Category:Websites]]
[[Category: ED Saga]]

Category:Attraction images

2011-06-09T07:33:42Z

IconOfEvi:

{{Honest}}
A set of photos taken by Chris to help publicize his [[love quest]]. They were originally published as part of [[CWC's Cool Profile]], an AOL webpage Chris established in [[2005]].

Somehow, the pictures didn't work as intended.

File:058-CWCJam061Front.jpg

2011-03-06T10:12:26Z

IconOfEvi:

[[Category: Scrapbook images]]

Sailor Megtune is dark.

A foreshadow of things to come?

File:Z100 0533.jpg

2010-11-20T13:36:39Z

IconOfEvi:

That, my friends, is the look of [[hypocrisy]].

File:106-FrustratedVirgin.jpg

2010-11-14T23:38:31Z

IconOfEvi:

[[Category: Scrapbook images]]
[[Category: Custom Yu-Gi-Oh! cards]]

BECAUSE YOU'RE THE MOST WORTHLESS POS TO WALK THE EARTH, THATS WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

User talk:IconOfEvi

2010-11-12T14:19:50Z

IconOfEvi: Created page with "There's supposed to be something here apparently... --~~~~"

There's supposed to be something here apparently... --[[User:IconOfEvi|IconOfEvi]] 06:19, 12 November 2010 (PST)

File:139-CWCsDarkGlare.jpg

2010-11-12T14:14:05Z

IconOfEvi:

[[Category: Scrapbook images]]
[[Category: Custom Yu-Gi-Oh! cards]]

It only legitimately takes off 700 pts because its creepy as hell, not evil.

File:BustACap.jpg

2010-11-08T07:36:20Z

IconOfEvi:

[[Category:Art from Sonichu Special 4]]

[[Chris]] shooting [[Liquid]], brutally paralyzing him.

Talk:Pregnant Act

2010-11-03T09:32:57Z

IconOfEvi: /* /r/ */

{{Not A Forum}}

Currently transcribing the new video he just uplaoded--[[User:Lylelash|Lylelash]] 15:33, 19 October 2010 (PDT)

* Uhm...I'll try to transcribe this BITCH. Oh GOD. -[[User:parlortrix|parlortrix]] October 18, 2010 11:43 PM CST
**Beat ya! [[User:Dude|Dude]] 21:54, 18 October 2010 (PDT)
***Not only did you do a better job, but you've spared me of having to watch it again. THANK YOU. -[[User:parlortrix|parlortrix]] October 18, 2010 12:13 AM CST
**** At 1:02 is he saying it's coming out the back? Or it's coming out the butt? -- [[User:Lunachu|Lunachu]] 14:35, 20 October 2010 (PDT)

* The description of the teat especially in this article is fantastic. Well played, Xavier orona. - [[User:Liquid!|Liquid!]] 04:40, 19 October 2010 (PDT)
::(''Bows humbly'')--[[User:Xavier orona|Xavier orona]] 20:05, 19 October 2010 (PDT)

isn't there an episode of American Dad where Steve gets pregnant or something. Possible inspiration?

Actually, this (especially how Chris got "pregnant") is oddly similar to It's All Too Much, an infamous, So Bad It's Horrible Beatles realfic where Paul gets pregnant. Look it up. --[[User:MaxTehManyula|MaxTehManyula]]

==/r/==

Can we get some drawfags to do an artists impression of the birth please?
[[User:Dkd|Dkd]] 17:30, 19 October 2010 (PDT)
*Sure, I'll start working on it. --[[User:MissRadioactive|MissRadioactive]] 23:40, 20 October 2010 (PDT)
**Thanks. Also, can we get the "Chris fucks a gun" comic onto this page, where he gives birth to a sonee out of his ass? I would do it, but me not good at putting pictures up on page
***Did it --[[User:IconOfEvi|IconOfEvi]] 02:32, 3 November 2010 (PDT)
[[User:Dkd|Dkd]] 03:52, 22 October 2010 (PDT)

File:Guncomic.jpg

2010-11-03T09:32:10Z

IconOfEvi:

[[Category:Chris-Chan (fanart)]] [[Category:OCs]] [[Category:Sonichu (fanart)]]

Little did the artist who made this know that it would soon become reality.

Talk:WelcometoBollywood

2010-11-03T09:28:24Z

IconOfEvi: Created page with "Im Indian ethnically, and I just got a great idea for some new Userboxes and this page --~~~~"

Im Indian ethnically, and I just got a great idea for some new Userboxes and this page --[[User:IconOfEvi|IconOfEvi]] 02:28, 3 November 2010 (PDT)

File:Ecp00065.jpg

2010-10-29T23:00:32Z

IconOfEvi:

Lick lick lick lick [[Medallion|you]] from your head to your toes!

Talk:11042009 51 50

2010-10-29T11:07:38Z

IconOfEvi: /* Weight */

Transcribing! Also, can we please get a better name? Like "Chris Pumps Iorn" or "Chris does reps" or something?--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 06:22, 5 November 2009 (CET)
*...Elbow-greased strength? -- [[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 06:44, 5 November 2009 (CET)
**Oooh! That one's good! I'm changing my vote to that.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 06:49, 5 November 2009 (CET)
**That's good. I also suggest "The Big Five-Oh." [[User:Alteceastlansing|Alteceastlansing]] 06:53, 5 November 2009 (CET)
***I called it "51 50" on the [[List of videos]]. I think that's what CWC intended to call it. --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 21:24, 5 November 2009 (CET)

Sure, if you want to. I only made the page, a more flavorful name would help I reckon--[[User:El Presidente|El Presidente]] 06:31, 5 November 2009 (CET)

The original link to the weight of a can of soda was based on an 12 pack of 8-ounce cans, but those are 12-ounce cans that he has (in his soda cartons that is; his man-cans are much heavier). So I changed the link. [[User:Alteceastlansing|Alteceastlansing]] 06:38, 5 November 2009 (CET)
:Those boxes really don't look full. [[User:JohnnyA|JohnnyA]] 07:58, 5 November 2009 (CET)

If he's claiming it's 4.26 litres tall, and all the cans are full then the box could not have weighed anymore than 4.26kg--[[User:El Presidente|El Presidente]] 06:41, 5 November 2009 (CET)

*4.26 litres would refer to the volume of the liquid itself. The aluminum cans and the carton would add a touch more weight than just that of the liquid. [[User:Alteceastlansing|Alteceastlansing]] 08:12, 5 November 2009 (CET)

**Converted exactly, the 12pack weighs about 8.9lbs. The article says 10 at the moment. I can't be the only one that is uneasy giving CWC those extra 2lbs. --[[User:Blueatom|Blueatom]] 15:00, 5 November 2009 (CET)

In all fairness to that damned impostor Ian Brandon Anderson, simply giving the mass of those packs of cans won't do justice to the amount of effort he puts out in lifting those boxes. Let's say that each of those packs has a mass of 3 kg. Compared to lifting two 3kg dumbbells, a lot more effort needs to be made for lifting those boxes, because the mass is distributed a fair distance away from where he's gripping them. Just as trying to a 10kg weight over your head when it's on the other end of a 20m pole would be tougher than just picking the damn thing up and lifting it over your head, there's an added difficulty with lifting these boxes vs. a normal weight. That's not to say that IBA's feat is of Olympian strength (or even respectable strength), but it is to say that trying to figure out the weight of the boxes doesn't really prove all that much. And... as for the transcript, are you sure he says that they weigh 50 pounds? It kind of sounds like "15 pounds", which would be a lot more accurate. Anyway... Chris fails, regardless. I also propose that we name this video "Chris Pumps Aluminum and Cardboard". Though "The Big Five-Oh" is pretty appealing, too.... I'm done rambling. --[[User:Tristran|Tristran]] 07:10, 5 November 2009 (CET)

* No, he's definitely saying "50 pounds." Actually, he's saying "fitty pounds." [[User:Alteceastlansing|Alteceastlansing]] 07:17, 5 November 2009 (CET)

** He's saying 50. --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 07:18, 5 November 2009 (CET)

***I just listened to it again. Sounds like 50 to me. --[[User:Beat|Beat]] 07:23, 5 November 2009 (CET)

****I seem to stand corrected. --[[User:Tristran|Tristran]] 19:44, 5 November 2009 (CET)

Alright, so who else is willing to bet at the end when he says "I'm str..." and cuts off that instead of saying strong he intended to bring his sexuality back in for no good reason? [[User:Artiph|Artiph]] 23:59, 5 November 2009 (CET)

== [[Chris and strength]] (or sth like that) requested ==

Or just a major update to [[Chris and health]]. (Edit: OK, there's a section for this there already.) --[[User:Sonijew|Sonijew]] 08:55, 5 November 2009 (CET)

:Is anyone else curious as to what brought on this whole "I'm strooooooooooooooong" phase of his recently? I mean he's always been a violent freak, but he's specifically making the point ""I'm strooooooooooooooong" a lot more lately. Does anyone know if there's any reasoning behind why he's feeling the sudden urge to prove his physical prowess (or lack thereof) so bluntly?--[[User:Curshot|Curshot]] 17:29, 5 November 2009 (CET)

::Chris knows he at least has more mass than Liquid or Gregg, and by his logic, that means he's tougher than them. So now he's trying to lord over them one of the area's he's certain he's superior in.
::He keeps challenging them to "Fight him in person" so maybe he really hopes that they'll come to his house one of his days so he can beat them up. Alternately, I guess he could be aware of the fact that he'd get has ass handed to him, and is doing this whole "I'M STRONNNNNNNG" thing as a way of trying to intimidate them into never showing up, so he can sit at home and be all smug at the fact that trolls are terrified of him.
::Either way, he's failing hardcore. --[[User:Beat|Beat]] 18:34, 5 November 2009 (CET)
::I think the whole "Strongman show" started with the [[Sign Destruction Video]]. Chris looked weak on it and Clyde laughed at him in a video response. This brought us to the hilarious [[Chris Loses It]] video. In Clyde response, he said that he would be scared when Chris will become more powerful. Our favorite man-child took him to word and the Kacey saga pushed him in this strongman trip even deeper. In any cases, this is excellent trolling from anyone involved. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 19:56, 5 November 2009 (CET)

:Don't forget that he needs to impress Kacey with his manliness. --[[User:Tristran|Tristran]] 19:44, 5 November 2009 (CET)

== What is Parappa saying on his shirt? ==

--[[User:Sonijew|Sonijew]] 15:16, 5 November 2009 (CET)
*According to my research, (And by research, I mean looking at a shirt just like his,[http://kotaku.com/274863/parappa-the-t+shirt link]), He's saying "I gotta believe!".--[[User:SP-441|SP-441]] 16:28, 5 November 2009 (CET)

==Even less?==

According to the link, diet soda weighs less than regular because real sugar weighs more. And because it's lemonade and isn't dealing with carbonation, it could also be fluctuating to be something different. Could we be going into the 9 lb. range?

But then, maybe I'm thinking too far into what might be an ounce of difference. --[[User:LizardPie|LizardPie]] 21:52, 6 November 2009 (CET)

==Crusher==

Chris' fervent can-lifting reminded me of [http://www.poetv.com/video.php?vid=50723 Todd Wentworth]! [[User:Klingerbgoode|Klingerbgoode]] 12:09, 9 November 2009 (CET)

== Weight ==

Didn't Chris say somewhere (in a mailbag or something) that he was only like 150lbs?

While I scoffed, and its still likely untrue, there may be a hidden gem in all this.

If I recall, muscle weighs 3 or 4x as much as fat, and much more dense. Chris's muscles by contrast, seem to have withered away to nearly nothing, seeing as how he can't break sticks or stuff like that, and as pointed out in the article, that no one can really see if his muscles are doing any work. Even his reactions are all clumsy now (witness the video where he tries to unleash his knife for example). So theoretically, he really COULD be 150lbs...150lbs of pure blubber and blubber laden organs. People can be 250-300 lbs, and its all muscle or fat with solid muscle underneath. --[[User:IconOfEvi|IconOfEvi]] 19:11, 25 October 2010 (PDT)

*Chris just uploaded a video that showed he was about 216 pounds. Have fun with that. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 20:13, 25 October 2010 (PDT)

**Main weight discussion/page formulation seems to have moved to the [[Talk:WeighIn|WeighIn Talk Page]] --[[User:IconOfEvi|IconOfEvi]] 04:07, 29 October 2010 (PDT)

Talk:11042009 51 50

2010-10-29T11:04:48Z

IconOfEvi:

Transcribing! Also, can we please get a better name? Like "Chris Pumps Iorn" or "Chris does reps" or something?--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 06:22, 5 November 2009 (CET)
*...Elbow-greased strength? -- [[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 06:44, 5 November 2009 (CET)
**Oooh! That one's good! I'm changing my vote to that.--[[User:Beat|Beat]] 06:49, 5 November 2009 (CET)
**That's good. I also suggest "The Big Five-Oh." [[User:Alteceastlansing|Alteceastlansing]] 06:53, 5 November 2009 (CET)
***I called it "51 50" on the [[List of videos]]. I think that's what CWC intended to call it. --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 21:24, 5 November 2009 (CET)

Sure, if you want to. I only made the page, a more flavorful name would help I reckon--[[User:El Presidente|El Presidente]] 06:31, 5 November 2009 (CET)

The original link to the weight of a can of soda was based on an 12 pack of 8-ounce cans, but those are 12-ounce cans that he has (in his soda cartons that is; his man-cans are much heavier). So I changed the link. [[User:Alteceastlansing|Alteceastlansing]] 06:38, 5 November 2009 (CET)
:Those boxes really don't look full. [[User:JohnnyA|JohnnyA]] 07:58, 5 November 2009 (CET)

If he's claiming it's 4.26 litres tall, and all the cans are full then the box could not have weighed anymore than 4.26kg--[[User:El Presidente|El Presidente]] 06:41, 5 November 2009 (CET)

*4.26 litres would refer to the volume of the liquid itself. The aluminum cans and the carton would add a touch more weight than just that of the liquid. [[User:Alteceastlansing|Alteceastlansing]] 08:12, 5 November 2009 (CET)

**Converted exactly, the 12pack weighs about 8.9lbs. The article says 10 at the moment. I can't be the only one that is uneasy giving CWC those extra 2lbs. --[[User:Blueatom|Blueatom]] 15:00, 5 November 2009 (CET)

In all fairness to that damned impostor Ian Brandon Anderson, simply giving the mass of those packs of cans won't do justice to the amount of effort he puts out in lifting those boxes. Let's say that each of those packs has a mass of 3 kg. Compared to lifting two 3kg dumbbells, a lot more effort needs to be made for lifting those boxes, because the mass is distributed a fair distance away from where he's gripping them. Just as trying to a 10kg weight over your head when it's on the other end of a 20m pole would be tougher than just picking the damn thing up and lifting it over your head, there's an added difficulty with lifting these boxes vs. a normal weight. That's not to say that IBA's feat is of Olympian strength (or even respectable strength), but it is to say that trying to figure out the weight of the boxes doesn't really prove all that much. And... as for the transcript, are you sure he says that they weigh 50 pounds? It kind of sounds like "15 pounds", which would be a lot more accurate. Anyway... Chris fails, regardless. I also propose that we name this video "Chris Pumps Aluminum and Cardboard". Though "The Big Five-Oh" is pretty appealing, too.... I'm done rambling. --[[User:Tristran|Tristran]] 07:10, 5 November 2009 (CET)

* No, he's definitely saying "50 pounds." Actually, he's saying "fitty pounds." [[User:Alteceastlansing|Alteceastlansing]] 07:17, 5 November 2009 (CET)

** He's saying 50. --[[User:Anaconda|Anaconda]] 07:18, 5 November 2009 (CET)

***I just listened to it again. Sounds like 50 to me. --[[User:Beat|Beat]] 07:23, 5 November 2009 (CET)

****I seem to stand corrected. --[[User:Tristran|Tristran]] 19:44, 5 November 2009 (CET)

Alright, so who else is willing to bet at the end when he says "I'm str..." and cuts off that instead of saying strong he intended to bring his sexuality back in for no good reason? [[User:Artiph|Artiph]] 23:59, 5 November 2009 (CET)

== [[Chris and strength]] (or sth like that) requested ==

Or just a major update to [[Chris and health]]. (Edit: OK, there's a section for this there already.) --[[User:Sonijew|Sonijew]] 08:55, 5 November 2009 (CET)

:Is anyone else curious as to what brought on this whole "I'm strooooooooooooooong" phase of his recently? I mean he's always been a violent freak, but he's specifically making the point ""I'm strooooooooooooooong" a lot more lately. Does anyone know if there's any reasoning behind why he's feeling the sudden urge to prove his physical prowess (or lack thereof) so bluntly?--[[User:Curshot|Curshot]] 17:29, 5 November 2009 (CET)

::Chris knows he at least has more mass than Liquid or Gregg, and by his logic, that means he's tougher than them. So now he's trying to lord over them one of the area's he's certain he's superior in.
::He keeps challenging them to "Fight him in person" so maybe he really hopes that they'll come to his house one of his days so he can beat them up. Alternately, I guess he could be aware of the fact that he'd get has ass handed to him, and is doing this whole "I'M STRONNNNNNNG" thing as a way of trying to intimidate them into never showing up, so he can sit at home and be all smug at the fact that trolls are terrified of him.
::Either way, he's failing hardcore. --[[User:Beat|Beat]] 18:34, 5 November 2009 (CET)
::I think the whole "Strongman show" started with the [[Sign Destruction Video]]. Chris looked weak on it and Clyde laughed at him in a video response. This brought us to the hilarious [[Chris Loses It]] video. In Clyde response, he said that he would be scared when Chris will become more powerful. Our favorite man-child took him to word and the Kacey saga pushed him in this strongman trip even deeper. In any cases, this is excellent trolling from anyone involved. [[User:Griffintown|Griffintown]] 19:56, 5 November 2009 (CET)

:Don't forget that he needs to impress Kacey with his manliness. --[[User:Tristran|Tristran]] 19:44, 5 November 2009 (CET)

== What is Parappa saying on his shirt? ==

--[[User:Sonijew|Sonijew]] 15:16, 5 November 2009 (CET)
*According to my research, (And by research, I mean looking at a shirt just like his,[http://kotaku.com/274863/parappa-the-t+shirt link]), He's saying "I gotta believe!".--[[User:SP-441|SP-441]] 16:28, 5 November 2009 (CET)

==Even less?==

According to the link, diet soda weighs less than regular because real sugar weighs more. And because it's lemonade and isn't dealing with carbonation, it could also be fluctuating to be something different. Could we be going into the 9 lb. range?

But then, maybe I'm thinking too far into what might be an ounce of difference. --[[User:LizardPie|LizardPie]] 21:52, 6 November 2009 (CET)

==Crusher==

Chris' fervent can-lifting reminded me of [http://www.poetv.com/video.php?vid=50723 Todd Wentworth]! [[User:Klingerbgoode|Klingerbgoode]] 12:09, 9 November 2009 (CET)

== Weight ==

Didn't Chris say somewhere (in a mailbag or something) that he was only like 150lbs?

While I scoffed, and its still likely untrue, there may be a hidden gem in all this.

If I recall, muscle weighs 3 or 4x as much as fat, and much more dense. Chris's muscles by contrast, seem to have withered away to nearly nothing, seeing as how he can't break sticks or stuff like that, and as pointed out in the article, that no one can really see if his muscles are doing any work. Even his reactions are all clumsy now (witness the video where he tries to unleash his knife for example). So theoretically, he really COULD be 150lbs...150lbs of pure blubber and blubber laden organs. People can be 250-300 lbs, and its all muscle or fat with solid muscle underneath. --[[User:IconOfEvi|IconOfEvi]] 19:11, 25 October 2010 (PDT)

Chris just uploaded a video that showed he was about 216 pounds. Have fun with that. --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 20:13, 25 October 2010 (PDT)

File:Autobiographical.jpg

2010-10-29T11:02:13Z

IconOfEvi:

[[Category:Art from Sonichu 9]]

[[Naitsirhc]] serving as a Freudian slip for [[Chris|Christian's]]...[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|tendencies.]]

Pregnant Act

2010-10-29T10:57:17Z

IconOfEvi:

[[File:128747284554.png|thumb|Artist's rendition]]
[[File:JuniorMoviePoster.png|thumb|left|Leaked footage of the upcoming blockbuster movie]]

'''Pregnant Act''' is a creepy video [[Chris]] uploaded on 18 [[October 2010]]. In this video, we see more of Chris's [[Homos|transgender]] urges (while being able to physically see very little), as the scene begins with what amounts to a [[Chris and reality|biologically impossible]] (on multiple levels) self-impregnation, Chris having received what is presumably [[Jackie]]'s egg cell, which he has fertilized with his own [[navy]] (even though Jackie wasn't in the picture 9 months before the video was made). The 'pregnancy' is given form by padding under Chris's shirt, including the [[Plush Breasts|plush breasts]], in a scene straight out of Ed Gein's Bedtime Stories.

Having effectively screwed himself, the next scene has Chris on his back like some freakish turtle, futilely attempting to right himself (with notable actual effort, and not just acting). The nightmare continues with the birthing scene, Chris now pointing the camera at his own crotch, and completing the birth by tossing a [[Li'l Chris|teddy bear]] onto his... knees.

Finally, in a scene vaguely resembling [[Family Guy]], ManMom Chris has his stomach exposed, and the plush breasts stuffed down his [[sports bra]], while he forces the bear to suckle from the surely diseased, alkaline, bleach-smelling teat. The presumably new born baby then says it's first words. Chris seems to have no understanding that babies that young are incapable of speaking, which might go back to an old story of his claiming he started speaking at 6 weeks.

Chris removed the video the following day, and uploaded a newly recorded version shortly after.
{{clear}}

==Video==
[[Image:Guncomic.jpg|thumb|100px|right|The nightmarish and often forgotten first birth]]

{{Infobox/video
| name = Pregnant Act
| video = {{#ev:youtube|j7I2QBukJ4Y}}
| stardate = 18 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other|Male pregnancy}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt = {{VerticalRedYellowShirt|text}}, {{Cwcbra|text}},<br/>{{K-SwissShirt|text}}
| previous = [[100 2281]]
| next = [[Breast Cancer Awareness]]
}}

=== Transcript ===

Oh my god... look at me! Huh! My girlfriend reverse-impregnated me! [[Honor Roll|The egg came out of her, and got into me!]] When we were having sexxxsss... oh my gosh. Goodness... [''camera fumbling then jump cut'']

Hm. Ugh. Goodness it's difficult to get up these days, with number one in the way. Oof! Little heavy made me fall down. Made me fall down! [''camera fumbling''] Maybe I try... and see if get up. Oop! I fell down again! [''mumbling''] Let me tell you... oof! Ahh! [''grunts, then jump cut'']

Oh my goodness, it's a big one! [''grunts, strains, and mumbles''] Must watch breath... one two three! [''gasps''] EEeeaaahhhhgh! Ah! [''throws a stuffed bear onto lap''] Well! Congratulate me! I gave birth to a little beautiful baby... bear. And she's [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|female]]! Goodness... wow. [''jump cut'']

It's baby's open that's right little child. Eat all you want out of there. You eat all you want out of there. [''an electronic toy says "I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU!"''] Ha! First w-her first words! [[30 August 2009|We]] love you too!

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[100 2281]]|nextlink=[[Breast Cancer Awareness]]}}

==The Remake==
Chris removed the original video on 19 October, and uploaded a new version of the video shortly after. Now with improved lighting, and a more detailed explanation.
{{Infobox/video
| name = Pregnant Act
| video = {{#ev:youtube|sC8392Td5r4}}
| stardate = 19 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Other|Male pregnancy}}
| style = {{Crazy|text}}
| saga =
| shirt = {{VertRedGreenShirt|text}}, {{Cwcbra|text}}
| previous = [[A Public Announcement for Congress]]
| next = [[A Workout]]
}}

===Transcript===
[[File:ChrisGivingBirth.jpg|thumb|Artist's summary of the video]]
Oh my goodness [[Chris and English|me look at this]] I had sex with my girlfriend and it backfired on me, can’t believe this. Her egg went inside my [[Duck|dick]] and now it’s- now it’s been in me for like 9 months. Engh mani’m gunna get these stretch marks in a little while…ummgh dang. egh [[Obesity|laying down it’s hard for me to get back up again]]. Eeeaauuh, ung ung ung! Ehh! Well that was a major push, hope I didn’t lose it there! Erro here come- aaa ahhh think [[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|it’s coming out the back]]…think it’s coming out the - aaaaa one two three one two three. Engh! Engh! ENNGGHHHHHAAA! Well will you look at that, I gave birth to a beautiful baby... girl bear! [''Chris has his shirt pulled up, exposing his muscle bra and pale fish-belly, the bear is pressed up against the plush breasts''] You- no- little babies drinking my [[Navy|breast milk]]. Yeah you enjoy that don’t ya? My lil- my lil girl.

[''an electronic toy says "I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU!"''] Hmm.

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[A Public Announcement for Congress]]|nextlink=[[A Workout]]}}

[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]
{{videos}}

Common Questions

2010-10-28T07:20:21Z

IconOfEvi: /* 15 January 2010 */

In late [[December 2009]], the [[CWCipedia]] [[Mailbag|Mailbags]] gained a new subsection, a series of short questions allegedly asked by many people who had written to Chris. Chris was surprisingly diligent about answering all of these '''Common Questions''' (normal people would call them "Frequently Asked Questions" - "FAQ") with every new mailbag. The answers, unsurprisingly, were erratic at best. Sometimes Chris provided [[Honest Content|far too much information]], and other times he would provide a single word in response when a longer answer would have been expected. On occasion, he would change the text in the question itself to suit his needs, a practice of editing he'd been using in the mailbags since day one.

All of his answers have been compiled here, arranged by the date on which he answered them.

==28 December 2009==

*'''Q: Have you ever read any books on how to go about creating [[art]]? E.G. [[Wikipedia:Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain|Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain]], [[Wikipedia:The Elements of Style|The Elements of Style]], How to Draw Comics the Marvel Way, [[Mailbag 26#In which Chris's brain starts to work!|On Writing]], or things like internet tutorials?'''
::A: [[My Half of A Whole New World for Kacey|I have read such books]], and I have taken many [[art]]s classes too.

*'''Q: If you were a director [[A CWC Audition|in Hollywood]], what kinds of films would you make?'''
::A: Action/Steamy ([[Chris and English|Striaght]]) Romance

*'''Q: You said you read [[R.L. Stine]] books when you were in high school. What kind of books do you read now? "Literary" fiction? Genre, like mystery or horror or science fiction? Nonfiction?'''
::A: I read less books now, although the last book I read was [[Wikipedia:Pamela Anderson|Pamela Anderson]]'s Star.

*'''Q: Have you considered creating non-[[Sonichu]] comics or stories?'''
::A: Yes, and the ideas are still in my head.

*'''Q: Have you ever accepted and used constructive criticism in your comics? Or do you blow off anything anyone says that is slightly negative, even if their intentions are to help you improve your art?'''
::A: I have accepted and used ideas and criticism one such example was the [[Sonichu Fan Promo|Sonichu Animations from YouTube User: Timmys1984]]; it was very good, yet the lines were wrong originally. At least I have set that record straight in my [[Sonichu 9|9th Book]].

*'''Q: Why do you steal jokes from so many other sources (i.e. [[Family Guy]] and [[Excel Saga]]) and put it in your comics? It isn't very original and you can't come up with an original concept if all the humor in your comics is stolen.'''
::A: Like Family Guy, [[The Simpsons|Simpsons]], Excel Saga, and even [[South Park]], taking jokes is of acceptable practice; it works when the author is short on original jokes, and wants to fill in a good one. Everybody does it. "[[wikipedia:Simpsons_Already_Did_It|Simpsons Did It]]."

*'''Q: Describe your artistic process. How do you get inspiration for ideas for your comics? What goes through your head when you draw and color your comics?'''
::A: I get the idea beforehand in random thought/imagination/dream, get pen and paper and write/draw it out. A lot goes through my head, and it is hard for me as a [[Chris and his Ego|creative genius]] to remember it all on-the-spot verbatim.

*'''Q: We all know you have [[autism]], but exactly what type do you have? There are multiple types on the spectrum.'''
::A: High-Functioning Autism.

*'''Q: What do you plan to do after you have found your true [[sweetheart]] and had your daughter [[Crystal]]?'''
::A: I will live my family life as I had dreamed and waited for hapily.

*'''Q: What would you do if either of you turned out to be infertile?'''
::A: That is just plain stupid; I am VERY Fertile; Certified in the Medical Clinic, and I would make sure my woman has not hit Menopause yet.

*'''Q: What would you do if you found your sweetheart, fell in love with her, married her, but she could only give birth to male children?.'''
::A: It is a 50/50 chance among all women; I trust God to come through in his promise as he has told me before. I will keep trying though; I am not [[Wikipedia:Henry VIII of England|King Henry VIII]].

*'''Q: Aside from creating Sonichu and [[Rosechu]] and excluding your future accomplishment of getting a true sweetheart and having your daughter Crystal, what is your greatest accomplishment in life and why?'''
::A: Graduating [[Manchester_High_School|High School]] and [[College]]; I have learned a LOT and met the requirements; it's all good.

*'''Q: What are your top five priorities in life and why?'''
::A: 1) Good [[Health]] - Who wants to be ill or sick? 2) Happiness - I don't like being [[CWC is sad|sad]]. 3) [[Love Quest|Love]] - I want to feel loved and appreciated by my closest ones. 4) Projects/Job - It gives me something to do. 5) [[Money]] - It does not make the world go around, but everyone wants it to feel like they are getting something out of a deal.

*'''Q: If you were made the absolute leader of the entire world for a day and your word was taken as law, what sorts of things would you do to make the world a better place?'''
::A: [[Chris and reality|All Men and Women would be paired up in straight couples]], leaving none alone; any remaining will be saved for upcoming men/women respectively. All [[gays]] would be reprogrammed and encouraged to be straight.

*'''Q: What about fucking [[sex toys|sex dolls]], [[masturbating]], drawing [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|smut]]? Isn't this all forbidden for true Christians?'''
::A: It is not forbidden; that would be the Jews who are against those things, and I am not Jewish, and I respect them as [[Michael Snyder | individual people.]]

*'''Q: Contrary to what you stated in issue 8, the age of consent in most of the United States is BELOW 18 (17 or 16). What is your opinion on this?'''
::A: I understand that SOME states have that law, and I feel that it is good; [[Pedofork|it broadens the range by one or two years, so one would feel lest restricted]].

*'''Q: What would you say is the most romantic thing you have ever done with or to a woman?'''
::A: [[The Creepy Stare|Sensual, emotionally-linked eye-contact]].

*'''Q: We've been hearing about your creations becoming more and more popular amongst the gay community. What are your thoughts on this?'''
::A: Firstly, their perspectives of my work are flawed; they misunderstand some points, and I do not care for that at all; It is a STRAIGHT Comic; [[Homos]]exuality Lifestyle is HEAVILY DISCOURAGED and DETESTED. Second, I really feel hatred in them placing MY characters in their events WRONGFULLY, even in... [[It's UGH!|UGH!!!]]... pride parades and essays promoting their lifestyle. All of My [[Magi-Chan|Sonichus]] and [[Silvana|Rosechus]] Are Straight! And I Am Straight! DO NOT SAY OTHERWISE, Because It is Mislabeling; it is Very Wrong, and I DO NOT APPRECIATE IT AT ALL.

*'''Q: Do you plan to give an ending to Sonichu's story?'''
::A: [[Chris and reality|No]].

*'''Q: Do Sonichu and Rosechu have full names (that is, two-part names, like all other [[Sonichus]] and [[Rosechus]])? If so, what are they?'''
::A: No, they are the very first Sonichu and Rosechu, so they do not have such names.

*'''Q: Will Eevails, or possibly some other Tails-like creature, appear in your comic?'''
::A: No.

==31 December 2009==

*'''Q: What do you think about people harassing others over PlayStation home?'''
::A: I do not like it at all.

*'''Q: What are the 5 worst movies you have ever <s>seen</s> heard of and would never ever watch in your entire life?'''
::A: [[Homos|Brokeback Mountain, Borat, Bruno, Crying Game, Krull]].

*'''Q: What are the 5 worst TV shows you have ever <s>seen</s> heard of and would never ever watch in your entire life?'''
::A: I am unsure.

''Note: Chris added the strikeouts himself.''

*'''Q: What are the 5 worst video games you have ever played?'''
::A: I am unsure.

*'''Q: What are the 5 best movies you have ever seen?'''
::A: [[Mary Poppins]], All [[Transformers]] Movies, Both [[Ghostbusters|Ghostbuster]] Movies, [[Wikipedia:Saw (franchise)|All Saw Movies]], [[Christian Weston Chandler|The 40-Year Old Virgin]].

*'''Q: What are the 5 best TV shows you have ever seen?'''
::A: [[Transformers]] (ALL Seasons and Sets), [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] (All Shows), [[Pokémon|Pok'emon]] (All Seasons), Mythbusters, [[Filmation's Ghostbusters]] (Little Care for "The Real Ghostbusters"; Jake, Eddie and Tracy WERE THE [[Honest_Content#True_and_Honest,_HOnest_and_True|ORIGINAL]] REAL GHOSTBUSTERS).

*'''Q: What are the 5 best video games you have ever played?'''
::A: All [[Sonic|Sonic the Hedgehog Titles]], [[LittleBiGPlanet]] (PS3 AND PSP), All [[Guitar Hero]] Titles, All [[Animal Crossing]] Titles, All [[Pokémon|Pok'emon]] Titles.

*'''Q: Have you read classic comics like: [[Wikipedia:A Contract With God|A Contract With God]], [[Wikipedia:Maus|Maus]], [[Wikipedia:Watchmen|Watchmen]], or [[Wikipedia:The Sandman (Vertigo)|The Sandman]]?'''
::A: [[Wikipedia:Superman|Superman]], [[Wikipedia:Spider-Man|Spider-Man]] and the like.

*'''Q: Could you mention any specific titles or series of comics you have read (besides Sonic the Hedgehog)?'''
::A: Superman, Spider-Man and the like.

*'''Q: What's your creative process like?'''
::A: Random, Extensive, Tough to Comprehend sometimes...

*'''Q: How do you go about creating each comic--do you do storyboards or scriptwriting beforehand?'''
::A: Mental Storyboards and Scriptwriting, but I do write some of it out on paper.

*'''Q: How far in advance do you plan the story?'''
::A: About weeks to months in advance.

*'''Q: Besides Sonic, Pokemon, and your daily struggles, what inspires your writing and art?'''
::A: [[Things Chris has ripped off|Other shows, comics, video games]], and most importantly my [[Evan|Fans]]. :)

*'''Q: Did any specific comic book inspire you to create your own?'''
::A: I'd say the Sonic the Hedgehog Comic Book Series

*'''Q: Why comics as opposed to short stories/novels?'''
::A: I enjoy [[Chris and art|drawing]], and I feel better with having pictures to associate the words with.

*'''Q: Would you ever consider getting a massage?'''
::A: Yes, from Women Only.

*'''Q: What is your purpose in life?'''
::A: Does anyone really know their own ONE TRUE purpose in life? We mostly are supposed to live one moment and day at a time as best we can to make us individually feel satisfied and at peace.

*'''Q: Do you believe in an afterlife?'''
::A: [[Chris and Religion#Afterlife|Yes]].

*'''Q: What do you think happens after we die?'''
::A: Like most people; our souls leave our bodies, we end up in Heaven or Hell depending on our deeds/misdeeds, and [[Chris and Religion|possibly Reincarnation]].

==1 January 2010==

*'''Q: Where do you think you'll go after you die and why do you think that will be the case?'''
::A: I do my best and what I can to end up in Heaven, [[Lie|I do a lot of good deeds]].

*'''Q: You follow the Bible rigorously and believe homosexuality will send you to Hell. However, the Bible says that having unmarried sex will send you to Hell as well. Explain your reasonings you choose to ignore God's word and not waiting until after marriage but instead "after the 3rd date".'''
::A:Those more strict rules apply to the Jewish, especially the book of Leviticus. I am a Christian Methodist, and as long as we feel comfortable and happy with our lives, if the Christian individual feels comfortable with [[Chris and sex|premarital sex]], then it is cool.

*'''Q: Can you justify your anti-homosexuality? How exactly?'''
::A: Yes; the Homos I have heard from try to push their damn lifestyle in my face, and I DO NOT CARE FOR THAT AT ALL; What they do behind closed doors is None Of My Business, and I still Do Not Care to know a Damn Thing about it.

*'''Q: Why does Rosechu wear clothes while Sonichu does not? Additionally, why are Lolisa, DJ Jamsta, and Rosechu the only Sonichus and Rosechus who wear clothing?'''
::A: Well, Why does Cindy [[Bear]] not wear clothes? Why does Mickey Mouse wear pants yet Sonic and Donald Duck do not? Why does Daisy Duck wear ONLY a Top, yet Minnie Mouse wears a skirt? IT'S A CARTOON; WHO CARES?!

*'''Q: Are the Sonichu comics still aimed at children? If so, what age group?'''
::A: Yes, [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|Ages 7 and Up]].

*'''Q: I am really interested in your Lego [[CWCville]], could you please draw an elaborate map of it for me?'''
::A: One Day, I will draw a map, although it is similar to the City of Cwcville, VA.

==5 January 2010==

*'''Q: If Sonichu got published how much would each Issue cost?'''
::A: I'd estimate $2.25, given the current shelf-comic prices. But ON the [[PS3|Playstation Network]]'s Digital Comic Service, I'd estimate $0.99 or $1.99 per Digital Issue.

*'''Q: How often does Sonichu have to stop and take breaks when he's running?'''
::A: He only stops for a rescue, [[China|social life]], [[Obesity|eating a chili dog, tacos or whatever he feels like chowin' down]], and to relax at home with his family.

*'''Q: Virginia lets you to marry your first cousin, but doesn't allow gays to marry. Do you think cousin-marriage is better than gay marriage? Why or why not?'''
::A: [[Chris and anger|WHAT THE F***?! WHERE DID YOU HEAR THAT C***PIEST OF HEINOUS LIES ABOUT VIRGINIA?!]] Cousin-Marriage is just as Terrible and Unholy as MARRYING YOUR OWN [[Barbara|MOTHER]] OR [[Bob|FATHER]]! In comparison, both unholy marriages are equally terrible.

==7 January 2010==

*'''Q: You said that you confess your sins and pray every night. What sins do you confess?'''
::A: To name a couple: I apologize right after each time I say something like "God damn" (I'm sorry, God); I confess and apologize for, if any that day, angry responses to my own father after he starts an arguement or gets on my nerves.

*'''Q: What exactly happened when you were called into [[Mary Lee Walsh]]'s office?'''
::A: That was one time I would rather not go into or recall. She raised her voice at me in harsh tones about how "You won't be getting any women" or "Your methods are flawed and stupid" and even "You are Stupid, Christian". I responded very angrily and verbally abused her back. Then I was kicked out for a year with Anger Management and Psychiatrist assistance.

*'''Q: Why do you randomly capitalize words when you type?'''
::A: I do not type in [[Chris and hypocrisy|Caps at Random]]; I type those phrases or words in caps to EMPHASIZE MY POINT OR FACT.

*'''Q: When did you first realize that you hated the homos? Do your parents hate them as much as you do?'''
::A: I estimate that I started hating them about Summer, [[2003]] just after I started my Sweetheart Search, where I received the response from one woman, "Ooh, I'm sorry, I am a Lesbian." That, combined with my PAST dislike of MEN in general AND the later pictured images of such acts led me to DISGUST AND HATRED FOR THE HOMOSEXUALS. Plus ALL of the Homos within the Trolls AND all Homosexual Fans with their WRONGFUL Quoting of MY comics and characters in THEIR PAPERS and ESSAYS promoting homosexuality, and EVEN WORSE a Sonichu BALLOON in one of their God DAMED Pride Parades!!! ALL OF THESE FACTORS have ONLY made my view of the Homosexual Males WORSE! And I will say this again, '''SONICHU IS STRAIGHT, YOU DUMBASS GAYWADS.'''

==9 January 2010==

*'''Q: What do you think of people of different faiths other than your own (this includes Satanism,Atheism, Agnosticism)'''
::A: For most other religions, I am of neutral opinion and have no objections to them whatsoever. But for ALL those of Satanism and Atheism; I do not care for those Non-Religions AT ALL. I will not discriminate the people of those Non-Religions as Individual People.

*'''Q: How do you feel about the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual community? do they deserve the same rights as anyone else?'''
::A: As individual people, they all deserve Most Rights, but GAY MARRIAGE Should be made Illegal ALL Countries; Marriage is ONLY for Straight Man/Woman couples. I stand behind that most fully.

*'''Q: How do you feel about people of different political parties, political parties spanning from Anarchism to Fascism.'''
::A: As a Moderate (of Middle, Neutral Opinion), I have nothing against the other political parties. Mainly, because even though I do have the ability to learn about them, I know not ALL of the details of them.

*'''Q: How do you feel about Drugs? Drugs such as Marijuana, Cocaine, Cigarettes, [[Alcohol]], etc.'''
::A: I STAND FULLY AGAINST [[Tobacky|Cigarettes, Marijuana, Cocaine, Cigars]] and ALL other Drugs of the sort. The only exceptions are drugs that are Prescribed to the Individual Person, as long as they are not given to anyone they were not originally prescribed to, I have no objections. And Alcohol; in Responsible, Moderate amounts, it can be good for you, yet I do not support Too Much of it, as if left unchecked, irresponsible or unassisted, too much can lead to [[6 June 2010|fights that can lead to a trip to the hospital and automobile accidents]].

*'''Q: Do you hold any distaste for any worldly culture?'''
::A: Only those who fully promote smoking or such drugs that I have just elaborated against of.

*'''Q: Are you uncomfortable about [[Chris and race|people of Color]]? do you have any tensions towards them?'''
::A: I have no discomfort or tension against people of all colors. The only exception is in my choice of Sweetheart or Mate; No Personal Offense, but she can not be Black.

*'''Q: Are you disturbed or disgusted by different types of music? Many people dislike Death Metal: http://tinyurl.com/ch2yl5'''
::A: I have agreement on some lyrics of Death Metal tracks, but the Tune, as long as it is not at loud volume, it is still good.

*'''Q: What do you think of our current president? Is he deceiving Americans as the Right Wing has expressed?'''
::A: I think [[Obama]] is doing okay, yet I disagree with his Health Plan; it is premature at the time, because we can not afford it yet. The Right Wing are [[Bob Chandler|sour]], mean people; I give no concern to them.

*'''Q: Do you think Countries such as the Soviet Union or [[CWCville|North Korea]] Are actually Communist?'''
::A: I do not know much about those countries, so I can not give a full opinion on the topic. [[Lie|Although I do hate Communism]]; they are of wrong opinions and are considerably mean.

*'''Q: How do you think the situation in Afghanistan is going? Is there anything you would do different?'''
::A: I do not have full knowledge of that situation either.

*'''Q. Would you be willing to preform oral sex on a woman?'''
::A: Yes I would.

*'''Q. You often attempt to scare your trolls by stating they will go to hell. Some of your trolls do not believe in hell, what do you have to say to them?'''
::A: Firstly, it is NOT a "scare tactic", IT IS FACT. And second, I say "Well, Believe it or not. You are Not Dead Yet."

*'''Q. Have you ever thought about documenting your daily life? Kind of like a reality show?'''
::A: The topic has come to mind, yet I do not feel it appropriate yet.

*'''Q. Do you eat at restaurants other than [[McDonalds]] or [[Coffee_Place|Burger King]]?'''
::A: Yes, namely Golden Corral, Country Cookin' and iHop.

*'''Q. Do you ever consider playing [[Guitar Hero]] on expert instead of hard?'''
::A: I have played on Expert, and it is good.

*'''Q. What do you argue about with your dad?'''
::A: A number of things; I would not know where to begin on making the list of dumb topics he comes up with.

*'''Q. Why do you want to get the original [[Power Rangers]] back together? They're 40, no longer fit the costumes, one of them is dead, and one of them went to jail for drunk driving.'''
::A: Originally, I meant ONLY to '''[[Revive Zordon]]'''; I mean PRESIDENTS, POLICE CHIEFS and such Recruiting Power Rangers and Creating Zords? Not only is it Trite and LAME, it is not as CLASSIC or Good Quality as Zordon.

*'''Q. Do your parents freak out about you playing with [[My Little Pony|girl's toys]] when you're a grown man?'''
::A: No, they do not, and I gave that up [[CWC Update 18 March 2009 More Updated|long ago]].

*'''Q. What other ideas did you think of to attract women before you settled on a cardboard sign?'''
::A: Newspaper/Magazine Ads, Online Dating Sites, Video Dating Services to name a few; THEY COST MONEY.

*'''Q. What do you want to be when you grow up?'''
::A: I am [[Chris and reality|ALREADY GROWN UP]]; I am 27 Years Old, going on 28. I am a [[Chris and reality|great artist]], and I am looking forward to an Office Job.

==15 January 2010==

*'''Q: If you could change the law, how would you change it? and you said you would outlaw the [[friend zone]]? why? what happened to a woman's right to choose who she wants to be with?'''
::A: Nothing has happened in [[Women's Rights]]; the "Friend Zone" is only the LOUSIEST EXCUSE EVER to give to someone [[Megan|the woman]] deeply cares about and trusts so she could [[Chris and rape|get out of sex]] or a relationship. I do not take kindly to that Excuse at this time.

*'''Q: Do you like everything you see, so long as it doesn't have gay stuff in it?'''
::A: Non-gay stuff is acceptable, but I don't like EVERYTHING I SEE; there are some things, even straight things, that I don't like either.

*'''Q: [http://www.ratpacker.com/Images/Core_Commander.gif| If you could upload your brain into a robot body, would you? ]'''
::A: I do not think so.

*'''Q: Why aren't you sure of the five worst games you've played? You can't have enjoyed [[List of Chris's games|every game you played]].'''
::A: I just could not think of any that would total up to five.

*'''Q: If you went back to college, what would you major in? What classes would you take?'''
::A: I am not sure.

*'''Q: Why do you like the name "[[Reginald]]" so much?'''
::A: Because [[PandaHalo|a woman]] who was close to me picked it out for the son in our role-play scenario; now she's [[Chris and death|dead]], and I still miss her sometimes.

*'''Q: Did you know that nearly all male porn actors start out making gay porn? What do you think of this?'''
::A: Whatever; I do not care.

*'''Q: [[Christian Love Day|Why did you get rid of asexuality in Sonichu 10]]? Hasn't it occurred to you that some people just don't like being in romantic relationships, and are much happier single? '''
::A: It had occured to me about asexuality recently from a mailbag question, and made me think about it, and NOT being able to FEEL the Attraction is Just Sad.

*'''Q: In a recent chat, you said that if you had a chance, you would want to make being a homo illegal. Yet, in a video contemporary to the chat, you ask your fans not to leave you. How would you feel if all of your [[Gay4Sonichu|gay fans]] left you?'''
::A: I would not want them to leave; they are still fans.

*'''Q: Have you ever considered getting your own apartment? What prevents you from doing so? '''
::A: Yes I have considered it. [[Chris and money|Current financial situations]] and fear of change (a common [[Autistic]] Trait) prevents me from doing so.

*'''Q: If there were no women, and men could reproduce sexually with other men, would homosexuality still be wrong?'''
::A: ONLY if that was the case, I would say Shoot Me.

*'''Q: Why do so many of your videos have a greenish-yellow tinge?'''
::A: It's one of the flaws in recording with Sony's EyeCreate Program (a downloadable Playstation 3 Application that requires the [[PSEye|Playstation Eye Camera]]); THEY NEED TO FIX THE PROGRAM, not only of that tint from Lack Of Some Light, but the Audio/Video skips that seems to occur during recording.

*'''Q: You hate homos, but you also hate straight men for "taking all the pretty girls leaving none for you." Shouldn't you support homos, so that other men can date each other and free up girls for you?'''
::A: NO, because Homosexuality is STILL WRONG.

*'''Q: Sex isn't that big of a deal. It's fun, but you don't have to have sex to be happy. Why are you so big about sex?'''
::A: Oh, I don't know, how about being a [[Virgin with rage|Frustrated Virgin]]?!

*'''Q: Would life be better if we reproduced nonsexually, and thus didn't have a sex drive?'''
::A: That is Bull[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|c***]].

*'''Q: Since you haven't been very specific about your taste in women, who are your favorite porn stars?'''
::A: To name a few: [[Wikipedia:Jenna Jameson|Jenna Jameson]], [[Wikipedia:Daisy Marie|Daisy Marie]] and [[Wikipedia:Carmen Luvana|Carmen Luvana]].

*'''Q: Do you have any friends in the Autistic community?'''
::A: Only a few Acquaintances.

==20 January 2010==

*'''Q: Have you ever considered the possibility that you may never lose your virginity? What will you do then? How old do you think is too old to be a virgin?'''
::A: No. The next question is Non-Applicable. 40.

*'''Q: If you could have sex with one famous woman, living or historical, who would it be?'''
::A: [[Britney Spears]].

*'''Q: Why do you think [[Asperchu]] currently has 10 times as many fans as Sonichu?'''
::A: "Fans" are fickle, and so are "Fads"; the Non-True Fans will always look for the Next "Fad" until they tire of it and move on to the next "Fad". In this note, I would say that I am Possibly Retro, and [[Chris and Fashion|Retro is ALWAYS IN]].

*'''Q: Would you say your life has improved since thinking up Sonichu? Why or why not?'''
::A: [[Chris and his ego|Yes; I became famous,]] and becoming famous is not an easy task.

*'''Q: Do you know what the word "[[Chris and hypocrisy|hypocrite]]" means?'''
::A: "hypocrite"; an adjective; 1) to be of a belief while not upholding that belief. 2) a total liar. 3) an UNTRUE Fan. example: When the Sonichu Fan left Sonichu for a [[Asperchu|newer, yet badly drawn, thing]], after having said that they would always enjoy Sonichu forever, is a '''hypocrite''' among the Truest and Loyalest Sonichu Fans.

*'''Q: I noticed that you have a Marge [[Simpson]] poster on your wall. Do you find her sexually appealing and if yes why?'''
::A: That is the pin-up from a "Playboy" a few months ago. She is appealing, yes, but I am more attracted to the real-life women around us all.

*'''Q: What's with all the pictures of Rosechu with a pickle on the internet? I thought she was supposed to be ALL WOMAN?'''
::A: Rosechu IS All Woman; she transformed from a Female Raichu; those people are just being stupid jerks with such "renditions".

*'''Q: How do you expect to keep us last remaining fans by stop working on the comic pages?'''
::A: I am drawing pages every day; just be patient and have full faith, unless you want to be considered a '''hypocrite''' among True, Loyal Sonichu and Rosechu Fans.

==26 January 2010==
*'''Q: If Rosechu is a Raichu, that means she's more evolved then Sonichu, who is a Pikachu. Shouldn't she be more powerful than Sonichu and be the leader?'''
::A: Evolution makes no difference; Rosechu is equally as powerful as Sonichu; Sonichu is the main character; Rosechu has equal leadership roles, so [[Women's rights|she leads when appropriate]].

*'''Q: Why do you think you are better artist than [[Alec Benson Leary|Alec]], aside from low-resolution and his style's blockiness? Is there something wrong to have quirky and blocky drawing style?'''
::A: How about the fact that his style looks Retarded and something that [[Chris and hypocrisy|a 2-Year Old can do]]? There's nothing wrong, unless you want to be TRULY Respected as an Avid Artist and Serious Person.

*'''Q: Why is [[Flame the Sunbird]] a ripoff of Kazooie?'''
::A: Flame was NEVER taken from Kazooie; if anything, he is MORE similar to Knuckles, but with a Sunbird Form.

*'''Q: You have expressed disdain for Asperchu and Simonchu, but how do you feel about [[Fan:Moon-Pals|Moon-Pals]]? Have you read it? If not, it would only be fair for you to do so.'''
::A: I have read Moon-Pals, and I feel that it is more like Moon-Dorks the way Sean draws and Portrays their Events so Grotesquely.

*'''Q: How many fans do you think you have? Please specify one of the following options: 0-10, 11-100, 101-1000, 1001-10000, 10000+.'''
::A: [[Ego|1000000000+.]]

*'''Q: How many fans do you think Asperchu has? Please specify one of the following options: 0-10, 11-100, 101-1000, 1001-10000, 10000+.'''
::A: 0-10
''Chris left this last question unanswered until 30 January.''

==30 January 2010==
*'''Q: Will you ever be able to accept criticism without being condescending or changing the subject?'''
::A: Yes.

*'''Q: Capital punishment (the Death Penalty) is legal in the Commonwealth of Virginia. Do you support the death penalty?'''
::A: [[9 February 2010|I do not support the death penalty]].

*'''Q: Could you post the letter you sent to Barack Obama on the CWCipedia?'''
::A: I am afraid I did not make a photocopy of the letter, and I had snail-mailed it weeks ago, so I can not do that.

*'''Q: You talk about how [[Asperchu]] is just a fad, but what if Sonichu is actually the fad that's starting to fade?'''
::A: I disagree.

*'''Q: If Rosechu is equal to Sonichu in power why does she need to be saved by him?'''
::A: She was caught off-guard at those times.

==1 February 2010==
*'''Q: Why do people who "[[Mailbag 49#Apparently that's reason enough|tick you off]]" [[Mailbag 49#Chris loves his country|deserve to die in explosions]]? Didn't Matthew say to love thy enemy?'''
::A: I never said that phrase, nor meant it in any way.

*'''Q: If you don't support the death penalty, that means you believe all life is sacred, right? Then why do you call for the deaths of gays? Is it only straight people who shouldn't get the death penalty?'''
::A: [[Death threats|All Life IS sacred]].

*'''Q: How come you become more and more like a dictator like Kim Jong Il, Hugo Chavez, or Vladimir Putin with your mailbags?'''
::A: I am NOT a Dictator. Why are you giving me an even WORSE Mislabeling than the Homosexual Mislabelings? Why do YOU have to be so bored that you have to make up NEW mislabelings to try and deface me over and over again?

*'''Q: Why did you choose to show the first black character in the series in a negative and racist light?'''
::A: That one is NOT a recurring character; the one who WILL be recurring characters are and will be like [[Jerkop|Police Officers]] like Louis Perez.

*'''Q: Why did [[Ultra Sonichu]] cure Aspergers, but did nothing for the physically challenged Rosechus in CWCville?'''
::A: Mental Problems can be cured Easier than Physical.

*'''Q: Why do you constantly edit the letters you receive? Don't you think it is insulting and rude?'''
::A: I am working on that, and Editing Less.

*'''Q: Do you like zombies? What weapon would you use to defend yourself in the zombie apocalypse? Where would you hold out?'''
::A: No, I do not like zombies. I would use a [[Megatron pistol|Gun]]. [[14 Branchland Court|Where I can]].

*'''Q: If you claim to respect your fans, why is it okay for you to "promise" to do a Sonichu page everyday, and then not keep up on that promise?'''
::A: I am [[Chris and art|drawing the pages For Real]]; Hand-to-God. I have other life problems that delay me from getting them scanned and online sooner; Shoveling Snow, Chores, Earlier Bedtime and Routine Resituating.

*'''Q: Why don't you just draw [[Wild]] a new girlfriend, so you can remove [[Simonla]] like [[Evan]] asked you to? Most people have more than one relationship in their lives, so it should not be that much of a problem. Or a you so uncreative that you can not think of a new character?'''
::A: I have stated before that when ONE finds [[Boyfriend-free girl|their Match]], they KEEP Each Other; I am NOT going to separate the Couple.

==22 February 2010==
*'''Q: How come your comics art hasn't improved since 2005, do you think you've reached your limit when it's come to the art of the Sonichu comic?'''
::A: On the contrary, my [[Chris and art|drawing skills]] have improved greatly over the years, yet it may be subtle and not obvious.

*'''Q: Why do you have a bedtime when you are around 30 years old?'''
::A: Everybody needs to sleep a while to recover energy from the past day.

*'''Q: What do you think of legally blind people?'''
::A: They're okay; they are keen to their other senses, and that is admirable. I have neutral to positive opinions of the legally blind.

*'''Q: Hey, Chris, what were your favorite after-school activities when you were a kid?'''
::A: Video games and Homework.

*'''Q: Were you ever involved in sports besides being the basketball towelboy, or did you take music lessons or art classes outside of school?'''
::A: I took a lot of Physical Education classes; I did not take classes outside of school before college.

*'''Q: If you can't get your car out because of the snow, shouldn't now be the perfect time to work on updating your comic?'''
::A: I have been working on the comic the whole time, as you will see very soon.

*'''Q: What's your favorite food? Does your mom ever cook at home? If she asked you to fix dinner, what would you do?'''
::A: Macaroni and Cheese; Yes; a small meal or soup.

*'''Q: Are there any video games out right now that you really want to play, but haven't gotten a chance to yet?'''
::A: [[Fanmail Reading|The Orange Box]], [[God of War]] III and Heavy Rain.
::''Note: neither God of War III nor [[Wikipedia:Heavy Rain|Heavy Rain]] had been released when Chris answered this question.''

*'''Q: If you could change anything about yourself physically, what would you change and why?'''
::A: Weigh myself down to 180 pounds.

*'''Q: How often do you shower?'''
::A: [[Chris and health#Chris and hygiene|Nightly]].

*'''Q: How often do you visit with friends and family outside of the house?'''
::A: Sometimes.

*'''Q: Do you enjoy [[20 December 2009|playing with your cats]]?'''
::A: Yes.

*'''Q: Do you actually play with all the [[toys]] in your room? If not, why not donate some to children who actually will play with them?'''
::A: I do sometimes play with all my toys.

*'''Q: Do you envy Sonichu for having a wife and kids?'''
::A: No.

*'''Q: Which of the Rosechus is the sexiest in your opinion?'''
::A: The Original Rosechu.

*'''Q: If shoveling snow is that hard for you, why don't you just pay some kid $10 to shovel your driveway?'''
::A: Hard work is good for me.

*'''Q: From between Issues #0 and #8 Which Electric Hedgehog pokemon do you like least and why?'''
::A: Silvana Rosechu, because of the Troll Influences, I felt forced to let Graduon magically make her a hermaphrodite for the sake of "TRANSFORM".

*'''Q: Have any of the Sonichus and Rosechus ever considered "swinging," aka swapping sex partners for the night?'''
::A: No.

*'''Q: What are the ten worst things that have happened to you in your life?'''
::A: 1) Trolls Pestering Me Constantly. 2) [[Julie|Learning that Ohio woman was actually a 13-year old boy]]. 3) Having my accounts hacked into. 4) Clyde Cash breaking into my ORIGINAL, which hosted The Original "[[CWC's Sonichu Site!|CWC's Sonichu Site]]", Tripod Account and screwing it up Royally. 5) Being banned from [[The GAMe PLACe|The (Game & Hobby) Place]] by that S.O.B., '''[[Michael Snyder]]'''; we never saw eye-to-eye, and for [[Chris and anger|some UNCOMPREHENDIBLE Reason]], aside from that time with my Wii, He Hated Me, Period. 6) Learning of the [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] Website late October, 2007, followed by learning [[Lucas|TWO OF]] [[Mimms|THE TROLLS]] were old Pok'emon TCG comrades in that same League I used to go to HAD PART in the creation of that D*** E.D. Page. 7) The loss of two True and Good Women who I had friendships with, Sarah Cassandra McKenzie ([[PandaHalo]]), and [[Sarah Jackson]]. 8) Being banned from [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] for a year. 9) Having to leave behind all of my [[Gal-pal|Girl Friends]] from High School after Graduation. 10) [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|Being pinned down on the floor by a teacher, two teacher aides, the Guidance Counsoler and the Principal on the floor and having my screams and cries recorded onto audiocassete back in 4th Grade]]. [[Fail|11)]] The [[Autism]].

*'''Q: Chris, what are the good deeds you have done that earn you the right to go to heaven?'''
::A: I have done a lot of good in my life, yet I did some bad, [[Chris and remorse|most of which was accidental, unintentional or beyond my knowledge]]. To name a few good things: holding the door for many people in various places, [[Chris and Death#Mike Jackson (1969-2010)|honoring my promises]], [[Chris and anger|being friendly and kind in person]], [[Chris and money|donating to various causes and a lot of other good things]].

*'''Q: Why does homosexuality immediately condemn the person to hell regardless of how good they are?'''
::A: I can not say; ask a Priest or Pastor.

*'''Q: At what age did you officially become mayor of CWCville?'''
::A: 18

*'''Q: At what age will your future daughter inherit the title of mayor of CWCville?'''
::A: 13 - 18

*'''Q: You know that crystal isn't a kind of metal, right?'''
::A: I know that; cyrstal is a kind of Mineral.

*'''Q: Who came up with the "Chris Chan" nickname?'''
::A: I did; it's the first halves of my first and last names, Chris tian Chan dler, and it has a "Jackie Chan" feel to it.

*'''Q: What inspired you to create Sonichu?'''
::A: The [[Christian's Favorite Hits!|CD Cover Project]] for Computer Graphics during my [[Chris and english|Seinor]] Year at Manchester High; Sonic and Pikachu.

*'''Q: Even though you've created him for over a decade, did Sonichu ever helped you accomplished anything?'''
::A: Yes; see myself as a better person.

*'''Q: Why did the Wailord dropped a boulder on [[Bubbles Rosechu|Bubble]]'s adoptive mother Swampert?'''
::A: the boulder was attached to that Wailord's underbelly, like Barnicles, and in its leap over Mama Swampert, the boulder detached itself.

*'''Q: Since you hate gay people so much, why do you use [[Rainbow]]s in your comics?'''
::A: I do not understand why the f*** the gays decided to use Rainbows as their symbol; that's like asking Hitler why he used the Swastika (which originally was a Lucky Symbol) for his whole mess.

*'''Q: What purpose have the [[Chaotic Combo]] served through out the whole comic?'''
::A: It's like asking why [[Sailor Moon]] needed the Sailor Soldiers of the other 8 planets; BACKUP, ADVICE and COMRADESHIP.

*'''Q: Why do you add yourself as a character?'''
::A: If it was good enough for Shinichi Watanabe in [[Excel Saga]] and Puni Puni Poemy, [[Chris and his Ego|it was good enough for me]]. But upon retrospect, I saw why it was a mistake.

==Awaiting Answers==
===From [[Mailbag 58]]===
*'''Q: What do you think of people who read both Sonichu and Asperchu? Do you think they are loyal fans?

*'''Q: Have you considered letting more comic series onto the the [[CWCipedia]]?

*'''Q: Would you date someone who loved the Xbox as much as you love [[PS3]] and hates PS3 as much as you do the [[Xbox]]?

*'''Q: If only [[slow in the minds]] could be turned into [[jerkops]], why didn't you get turned into one?

*'''Q: Why do you refuse to buy your father nice gifts and just settle for cheap candy or even nothing?

*'''Q: You say you're against the death penalty, so why is it that in your most recent comic pages you decided to kill off the Asperpedia crew?

*'''Q: Do you wish you could punish the Asperpals in real life the same way you did in your most recent comic book?

*'''Q: Why are things a fact when said by you, but an opinion when said by others?

*'''Q: What has been your greatest victory over the trolls?

*'''Q: What has been your biggest defeat at the hands of [[trolls]]?

===From [[Mailbag 59]]===
*'''Q:Why do you put Sonichu on your [[resume]] if you don't want it to be a job?

{{Mailbag}}

Common Questions

2010-10-28T07:19:48Z

IconOfEvi: /* 15 January 2010 */

In late [[December 2009]], the [[CWCipedia]] [[Mailbag|Mailbags]] gained a new subsection, a series of short questions allegedly asked by many people who had written to Chris. Chris was surprisingly diligent about answering all of these '''Common Questions''' (normal people would call them "Frequently Asked Questions" - "FAQ") with every new mailbag. The answers, unsurprisingly, were erratic at best. Sometimes Chris provided [[Honest Content|far too much information]], and other times he would provide a single word in response when a longer answer would have been expected. On occasion, he would change the text in the question itself to suit his needs, a practice of editing he'd been using in the mailbags since day one.

All of his answers have been compiled here, arranged by the date on which he answered them.

==28 December 2009==

*'''Q: Have you ever read any books on how to go about creating [[art]]? E.G. [[Wikipedia:Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain|Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain]], [[Wikipedia:The Elements of Style|The Elements of Style]], How to Draw Comics the Marvel Way, [[Mailbag 26#In which Chris's brain starts to work!|On Writing]], or things like internet tutorials?'''
::A: [[My Half of A Whole New World for Kacey|I have read such books]], and I have taken many [[art]]s classes too.

*'''Q: If you were a director [[A CWC Audition|in Hollywood]], what kinds of films would you make?'''
::A: Action/Steamy ([[Chris and English|Striaght]]) Romance

*'''Q: You said you read [[R.L. Stine]] books when you were in high school. What kind of books do you read now? "Literary" fiction? Genre, like mystery or horror or science fiction? Nonfiction?'''
::A: I read less books now, although the last book I read was [[Wikipedia:Pamela Anderson|Pamela Anderson]]'s Star.

*'''Q: Have you considered creating non-[[Sonichu]] comics or stories?'''
::A: Yes, and the ideas are still in my head.

*'''Q: Have you ever accepted and used constructive criticism in your comics? Or do you blow off anything anyone says that is slightly negative, even if their intentions are to help you improve your art?'''
::A: I have accepted and used ideas and criticism one such example was the [[Sonichu Fan Promo|Sonichu Animations from YouTube User: Timmys1984]]; it was very good, yet the lines were wrong originally. At least I have set that record straight in my [[Sonichu 9|9th Book]].

*'''Q: Why do you steal jokes from so many other sources (i.e. [[Family Guy]] and [[Excel Saga]]) and put it in your comics? It isn't very original and you can't come up with an original concept if all the humor in your comics is stolen.'''
::A: Like Family Guy, [[The Simpsons|Simpsons]], Excel Saga, and even [[South Park]], taking jokes is of acceptable practice; it works when the author is short on original jokes, and wants to fill in a good one. Everybody does it. "[[wikipedia:Simpsons_Already_Did_It|Simpsons Did It]]."

*'''Q: Describe your artistic process. How do you get inspiration for ideas for your comics? What goes through your head when you draw and color your comics?'''
::A: I get the idea beforehand in random thought/imagination/dream, get pen and paper and write/draw it out. A lot goes through my head, and it is hard for me as a [[Chris and his Ego|creative genius]] to remember it all on-the-spot verbatim.

*'''Q: We all know you have [[autism]], but exactly what type do you have? There are multiple types on the spectrum.'''
::A: High-Functioning Autism.

*'''Q: What do you plan to do after you have found your true [[sweetheart]] and had your daughter [[Crystal]]?'''
::A: I will live my family life as I had dreamed and waited for hapily.

*'''Q: What would you do if either of you turned out to be infertile?'''
::A: That is just plain stupid; I am VERY Fertile; Certified in the Medical Clinic, and I would make sure my woman has not hit Menopause yet.

*'''Q: What would you do if you found your sweetheart, fell in love with her, married her, but she could only give birth to male children?.'''
::A: It is a 50/50 chance among all women; I trust God to come through in his promise as he has told me before. I will keep trying though; I am not [[Wikipedia:Henry VIII of England|King Henry VIII]].

*'''Q: Aside from creating Sonichu and [[Rosechu]] and excluding your future accomplishment of getting a true sweetheart and having your daughter Crystal, what is your greatest accomplishment in life and why?'''
::A: Graduating [[Manchester_High_School|High School]] and [[College]]; I have learned a LOT and met the requirements; it's all good.

*'''Q: What are your top five priorities in life and why?'''
::A: 1) Good [[Health]] - Who wants to be ill or sick? 2) Happiness - I don't like being [[CWC is sad|sad]]. 3) [[Love Quest|Love]] - I want to feel loved and appreciated by my closest ones. 4) Projects/Job - It gives me something to do. 5) [[Money]] - It does not make the world go around, but everyone wants it to feel like they are getting something out of a deal.

*'''Q: If you were made the absolute leader of the entire world for a day and your word was taken as law, what sorts of things would you do to make the world a better place?'''
::A: [[Chris and reality|All Men and Women would be paired up in straight couples]], leaving none alone; any remaining will be saved for upcoming men/women respectively. All [[gays]] would be reprogrammed and encouraged to be straight.

*'''Q: What about fucking [[sex toys|sex dolls]], [[masturbating]], drawing [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|smut]]? Isn't this all forbidden for true Christians?'''
::A: It is not forbidden; that would be the Jews who are against those things, and I am not Jewish, and I respect them as [[Michael Snyder | individual people.]]

*'''Q: Contrary to what you stated in issue 8, the age of consent in most of the United States is BELOW 18 (17 or 16). What is your opinion on this?'''
::A: I understand that SOME states have that law, and I feel that it is good; [[Pedofork|it broadens the range by one or two years, so one would feel lest restricted]].

*'''Q: What would you say is the most romantic thing you have ever done with or to a woman?'''
::A: [[The Creepy Stare|Sensual, emotionally-linked eye-contact]].

*'''Q: We've been hearing about your creations becoming more and more popular amongst the gay community. What are your thoughts on this?'''
::A: Firstly, their perspectives of my work are flawed; they misunderstand some points, and I do not care for that at all; It is a STRAIGHT Comic; [[Homos]]exuality Lifestyle is HEAVILY DISCOURAGED and DETESTED. Second, I really feel hatred in them placing MY characters in their events WRONGFULLY, even in... [[It's UGH!|UGH!!!]]... pride parades and essays promoting their lifestyle. All of My [[Magi-Chan|Sonichus]] and [[Silvana|Rosechus]] Are Straight! And I Am Straight! DO NOT SAY OTHERWISE, Because It is Mislabeling; it is Very Wrong, and I DO NOT APPRECIATE IT AT ALL.

*'''Q: Do you plan to give an ending to Sonichu's story?'''
::A: [[Chris and reality|No]].

*'''Q: Do Sonichu and Rosechu have full names (that is, two-part names, like all other [[Sonichus]] and [[Rosechus]])? If so, what are they?'''
::A: No, they are the very first Sonichu and Rosechu, so they do not have such names.

*'''Q: Will Eevails, or possibly some other Tails-like creature, appear in your comic?'''
::A: No.

==31 December 2009==

*'''Q: What do you think about people harassing others over PlayStation home?'''
::A: I do not like it at all.

*'''Q: What are the 5 worst movies you have ever <s>seen</s> heard of and would never ever watch in your entire life?'''
::A: [[Homos|Brokeback Mountain, Borat, Bruno, Crying Game, Krull]].

*'''Q: What are the 5 worst TV shows you have ever <s>seen</s> heard of and would never ever watch in your entire life?'''
::A: I am unsure.

''Note: Chris added the strikeouts himself.''

*'''Q: What are the 5 worst video games you have ever played?'''
::A: I am unsure.

*'''Q: What are the 5 best movies you have ever seen?'''
::A: [[Mary Poppins]], All [[Transformers]] Movies, Both [[Ghostbusters|Ghostbuster]] Movies, [[Wikipedia:Saw (franchise)|All Saw Movies]], [[Christian Weston Chandler|The 40-Year Old Virgin]].

*'''Q: What are the 5 best TV shows you have ever seen?'''
::A: [[Transformers]] (ALL Seasons and Sets), [[Sonic the Hedgehog]] (All Shows), [[Pokémon|Pok'emon]] (All Seasons), Mythbusters, [[Filmation's Ghostbusters]] (Little Care for "The Real Ghostbusters"; Jake, Eddie and Tracy WERE THE [[Honest_Content#True_and_Honest,_HOnest_and_True|ORIGINAL]] REAL GHOSTBUSTERS).

*'''Q: What are the 5 best video games you have ever played?'''
::A: All [[Sonic|Sonic the Hedgehog Titles]], [[LittleBiGPlanet]] (PS3 AND PSP), All [[Guitar Hero]] Titles, All [[Animal Crossing]] Titles, All [[Pokémon|Pok'emon]] Titles.

*'''Q: Have you read classic comics like: [[Wikipedia:A Contract With God|A Contract With God]], [[Wikipedia:Maus|Maus]], [[Wikipedia:Watchmen|Watchmen]], or [[Wikipedia:The Sandman (Vertigo)|The Sandman]]?'''
::A: [[Wikipedia:Superman|Superman]], [[Wikipedia:Spider-Man|Spider-Man]] and the like.

*'''Q: Could you mention any specific titles or series of comics you have read (besides Sonic the Hedgehog)?'''
::A: Superman, Spider-Man and the like.

*'''Q: What's your creative process like?'''
::A: Random, Extensive, Tough to Comprehend sometimes...

*'''Q: How do you go about creating each comic--do you do storyboards or scriptwriting beforehand?'''
::A: Mental Storyboards and Scriptwriting, but I do write some of it out on paper.

*'''Q: How far in advance do you plan the story?'''
::A: About weeks to months in advance.

*'''Q: Besides Sonic, Pokemon, and your daily struggles, what inspires your writing and art?'''
::A: [[Things Chris has ripped off|Other shows, comics, video games]], and most importantly my [[Evan|Fans]]. :)

*'''Q: Did any specific comic book inspire you to create your own?'''
::A: I'd say the Sonic the Hedgehog Comic Book Series

*'''Q: Why comics as opposed to short stories/novels?'''
::A: I enjoy [[Chris and art|drawing]], and I feel better with having pictures to associate the words with.

*'''Q: Would you ever consider getting a massage?'''
::A: Yes, from Women Only.

*'''Q: What is your purpose in life?'''
::A: Does anyone really know their own ONE TRUE purpose in life? We mostly are supposed to live one moment and day at a time as best we can to make us individually feel satisfied and at peace.

*'''Q: Do you believe in an afterlife?'''
::A: [[Chris and Religion#Afterlife|Yes]].

*'''Q: What do you think happens after we die?'''
::A: Like most people; our souls leave our bodies, we end up in Heaven or Hell depending on our deeds/misdeeds, and [[Chris and Religion|possibly Reincarnation]].

==1 January 2010==

*'''Q: Where do you think you'll go after you die and why do you think that will be the case?'''
::A: I do my best and what I can to end up in Heaven, [[Lie|I do a lot of good deeds]].

*'''Q: You follow the Bible rigorously and believe homosexuality will send you to Hell. However, the Bible says that having unmarried sex will send you to Hell as well. Explain your reasonings you choose to ignore God's word and not waiting until after marriage but instead "after the 3rd date".'''
::A:Those more strict rules apply to the Jewish, especially the book of Leviticus. I am a Christian Methodist, and as long as we feel comfortable and happy with our lives, if the Christian individual feels comfortable with [[Chris and sex|premarital sex]], then it is cool.

*'''Q: Can you justify your anti-homosexuality? How exactly?'''
::A: Yes; the Homos I have heard from try to push their damn lifestyle in my face, and I DO NOT CARE FOR THAT AT ALL; What they do behind closed doors is None Of My Business, and I still Do Not Care to know a Damn Thing about it.

*'''Q: Why does Rosechu wear clothes while Sonichu does not? Additionally, why are Lolisa, DJ Jamsta, and Rosechu the only Sonichus and Rosechus who wear clothing?'''
::A: Well, Why does Cindy [[Bear]] not wear clothes? Why does Mickey Mouse wear pants yet Sonic and Donald Duck do not? Why does Daisy Duck wear ONLY a Top, yet Minnie Mouse wears a skirt? IT'S A CARTOON; WHO CARES?!

*'''Q: Are the Sonichu comics still aimed at children? If so, what age group?'''
::A: Yes, [[Sonichu and Rosechu's Luv Shack|Ages 7 and Up]].

*'''Q: I am really interested in your Lego [[CWCville]], could you please draw an elaborate map of it for me?'''
::A: One Day, I will draw a map, although it is similar to the City of Cwcville, VA.

==5 January 2010==

*'''Q: If Sonichu got published how much would each Issue cost?'''
::A: I'd estimate $2.25, given the current shelf-comic prices. But ON the [[PS3|Playstation Network]]'s Digital Comic Service, I'd estimate $0.99 or $1.99 per Digital Issue.

*'''Q: How often does Sonichu have to stop and take breaks when he's running?'''
::A: He only stops for a rescue, [[China|social life]], [[Obesity|eating a chili dog, tacos or whatever he feels like chowin' down]], and to relax at home with his family.

*'''Q: Virginia lets you to marry your first cousin, but doesn't allow gays to marry. Do you think cousin-marriage is better than gay marriage? Why or why not?'''
::A: [[Chris and anger|WHAT THE F***?! WHERE DID YOU HEAR THAT C***PIEST OF HEINOUS LIES ABOUT VIRGINIA?!]] Cousin-Marriage is just as Terrible and Unholy as MARRYING YOUR OWN [[Barbara|MOTHER]] OR [[Bob|FATHER]]! In comparison, both unholy marriages are equally terrible.

==7 January 2010==

*'''Q: You said that you confess your sins and pray every night. What sins do you confess?'''
::A: To name a couple: I apologize right after each time I say something like "God damn" (I'm sorry, God); I confess and apologize for, if any that day, angry responses to my own father after he starts an arguement or gets on my nerves.

*'''Q: What exactly happened when you were called into [[Mary Lee Walsh]]'s office?'''
::A: That was one time I would rather not go into or recall. She raised her voice at me in harsh tones about how "You won't be getting any women" or "Your methods are flawed and stupid" and even "You are Stupid, Christian". I responded very angrily and verbally abused her back. Then I was kicked out for a year with Anger Management and Psychiatrist assistance.

*'''Q: Why do you randomly capitalize words when you type?'''
::A: I do not type in [[Chris and hypocrisy|Caps at Random]]; I type those phrases or words in caps to EMPHASIZE MY POINT OR FACT.

*'''Q: When did you first realize that you hated the homos? Do your parents hate them as much as you do?'''
::A: I estimate that I started hating them about Summer, [[2003]] just after I started my Sweetheart Search, where I received the response from one woman, "Ooh, I'm sorry, I am a Lesbian." That, combined with my PAST dislike of MEN in general AND the later pictured images of such acts led me to DISGUST AND HATRED FOR THE HOMOSEXUALS. Plus ALL of the Homos within the Trolls AND all Homosexual Fans with their WRONGFUL Quoting of MY comics and characters in THEIR PAPERS and ESSAYS promoting homosexuality, and EVEN WORSE a Sonichu BALLOON in one of their God DAMED Pride Parades!!! ALL OF THESE FACTORS have ONLY made my view of the Homosexual Males WORSE! And I will say this again, '''SONICHU IS STRAIGHT, YOU DUMBASS GAYWADS.'''

==9 January 2010==

*'''Q: What do you think of people of different faiths other than your own (this includes Satanism,Atheism, Agnosticism)'''
::A: For most other religions, I am of neutral opinion and have no objections to them whatsoever. But for ALL those of Satanism and Atheism; I do not care for those Non-Religions AT ALL. I will not discriminate the people of those Non-Religions as Individual People.

*'''Q: How do you feel about the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual community? do they deserve the same rights as anyone else?'''
::A: As individual people, they all deserve Most Rights, but GAY MARRIAGE Should be made Illegal ALL Countries; Marriage is ONLY for Straight Man/Woman couples. I stand behind that most fully.

*'''Q: How do you feel about people of different political parties, political parties spanning from Anarchism to Fascism.'''
::A: As a Moderate (of Middle, Neutral Opinion), I have nothing against the other political parties. Mainly, because even though I do have the ability to learn about them, I know not ALL of the details of them.

*'''Q: How do you feel about Drugs? Drugs such as Marijuana, Cocaine, Cigarettes, [[Alcohol]], etc.'''
::A: I STAND FULLY AGAINST [[Tobacky|Cigarettes, Marijuana, Cocaine, Cigars]] and ALL other Drugs of the sort. The only exceptions are drugs that are Prescribed to the Individual Person, as long as they are not given to anyone they were not originally prescribed to, I have no objections. And Alcohol; in Responsible, Moderate amounts, it can be good for you, yet I do not support Too Much of it, as if left unchecked, irresponsible or unassisted, too much can lead to [[6 June 2010|fights that can lead to a trip to the hospital and automobile accidents]].

*'''Q: Do you hold any distaste for any worldly culture?'''
::A: Only those who fully promote smoking or such drugs that I have just elaborated against of.

*'''Q: Are you uncomfortable about [[Chris and race|people of Color]]? do you have any tensions towards them?'''
::A: I have no discomfort or tension against people of all colors. The only exception is in my choice of Sweetheart or Mate; No Personal Offense, but she can not be Black.

*'''Q: Are you disturbed or disgusted by different types of music? Many people dislike Death Metal: http://tinyurl.com/ch2yl5'''
::A: I have agreement on some lyrics of Death Metal tracks, but the Tune, as long as it is not at loud volume, it is still good.

*'''Q: What do you think of our current president? Is he deceiving Americans as the Right Wing has expressed?'''
::A: I think [[Obama]] is doing okay, yet I disagree with his Health Plan; it is premature at the time, because we can not afford it yet. The Right Wing are [[Bob Chandler|sour]], mean people; I give no concern to them.

*'''Q: Do you think Countries such as the Soviet Union or [[CWCville|North Korea]] Are actually Communist?'''
::A: I do not know much about those countries, so I can not give a full opinion on the topic. [[Lie|Although I do hate Communism]]; they are of wrong opinions and are considerably mean.

*'''Q: How do you think the situation in Afghanistan is going? Is there anything you would do different?'''
::A: I do not have full knowledge of that situation either.

*'''Q. Would you be willing to preform oral sex on a woman?'''
::A: Yes I would.

*'''Q. You often attempt to scare your trolls by stating they will go to hell. Some of your trolls do not believe in hell, what do you have to say to them?'''
::A: Firstly, it is NOT a "scare tactic", IT IS FACT. And second, I say "Well, Believe it or not. You are Not Dead Yet."

*'''Q. Have you ever thought about documenting your daily life? Kind of like a reality show?'''
::A: The topic has come to mind, yet I do not feel it appropriate yet.

*'''Q. Do you eat at restaurants other than [[McDonalds]] or [[Coffee_Place|Burger King]]?'''
::A: Yes, namely Golden Corral, Country Cookin' and iHop.

*'''Q. Do you ever consider playing [[Guitar Hero]] on expert instead of hard?'''
::A: I have played on Expert, and it is good.

*'''Q. What do you argue about with your dad?'''
::A: A number of things; I would not know where to begin on making the list of dumb topics he comes up with.

*'''Q. Why do you want to get the original [[Power Rangers]] back together? They're 40, no longer fit the costumes, one of them is dead, and one of them went to jail for drunk driving.'''
::A: Originally, I meant ONLY to '''[[Revive Zordon]]'''; I mean PRESIDENTS, POLICE CHIEFS and such Recruiting Power Rangers and Creating Zords? Not only is it Trite and LAME, it is not as CLASSIC or Good Quality as Zordon.

*'''Q. Do your parents freak out about you playing with [[My Little Pony|girl's toys]] when you're a grown man?'''
::A: No, they do not, and I gave that up [[CWC Update 18 March 2009 More Updated|long ago]].

*'''Q. What other ideas did you think of to attract women before you settled on a cardboard sign?'''
::A: Newspaper/Magazine Ads, Online Dating Sites, Video Dating Services to name a few; THEY COST MONEY.

*'''Q. What do you want to be when you grow up?'''
::A: I am [[Chris and reality|ALREADY GROWN UP]]; I am 27 Years Old, going on 28. I am a [[Chris and reality|great artist]], and I am looking forward to an Office Job.

==15 January 2010==

*'''Q: If you could change the law, how would you change it? and you said you would outlaw the [[friend zone]]? why? what happened to a woman's right to choose who she wants to be with?'''
::A: Nothing has happened in [[Women's Rights]]; the "Friend Zone" is only the LOUSIEST EXCUSE EVER to give to someone [[Megan|the woman]] deeply cares about and trusts so she could [[Chris and rape|get out of sex]] or a relationship. I do not take kindly to that Excuse at this time.

*'''Q: Do you like everything you see, so long as it doesn't have gay stuff in it?'''
::A: Non-gay stuff is acceptable, but I don't like EVERYTHING I SEE; there are some things, even straight things, that I don't like either.

*'''Q: [http://www.ratpacker.com/Images/Core_Commander.gif| If you could upload your brain into a robot body, would you?]'''
::A: I do not think so.

*'''Q: Why aren't you sure of the five worst games you've played? You can't have enjoyed [[List of Chris's games|every game you played]].'''
::A: I just could not think of any that would total up to five.

*'''Q: If you went back to college, what would you major in? What classes would you take?'''
::A: I am not sure.

*'''Q: Why do you like the name "[[Reginald]]" so much?'''
::A: Because [[PandaHalo|a woman]] who was close to me picked it out for the son in our role-play scenario; now she's [[Chris and death|dead]], and I still miss her sometimes.

*'''Q: Did you know that nearly all male porn actors start out making gay porn? What do you think of this?'''
::A: Whatever; I do not care.

*'''Q: [[Christian Love Day|Why did you get rid of asexuality in Sonichu 10]]? Hasn't it occurred to you that some people just don't like being in romantic relationships, and are much happier single? '''
::A: It had occured to me about asexuality recently from a mailbag question, and made me think about it, and NOT being able to FEEL the Attraction is Just Sad.

*'''Q: In a recent chat, you said that if you had a chance, you would want to make being a homo illegal. Yet, in a video contemporary to the chat, you ask your fans not to leave you. How would you feel if all of your [[Gay4Sonichu|gay fans]] left you?'''
::A: I would not want them to leave; they are still fans.

*'''Q: Have you ever considered getting your own apartment? What prevents you from doing so? '''
::A: Yes I have considered it. [[Chris and money|Current financial situations]] and fear of change (a common [[Autistic]] Trait) prevents me from doing so.

*'''Q: If there were no women, and men could reproduce sexually with other men, would homosexuality still be wrong?'''
::A: ONLY if that was the case, I would say Shoot Me.

*'''Q: Why do so many of your videos have a greenish-yellow tinge?'''
::A: It's one of the flaws in recording with Sony's EyeCreate Program (a downloadable Playstation 3 Application that requires the [[PSEye|Playstation Eye Camera]]); THEY NEED TO FIX THE PROGRAM, not only of that tint from Lack Of Some Light, but the Audio/Video skips that seems to occur during recording.

*'''Q: You hate homos, but you also hate straight men for "taking all the pretty girls leaving none for you." Shouldn't you support homos, so that other men can date each other and free up girls for you?'''
::A: NO, because Homosexuality is STILL WRONG.

*'''Q: Sex isn't that big of a deal. It's fun, but you don't have to have sex to be happy. Why are you so big about sex?'''
::A: Oh, I don't know, how about being a [[Virgin with rage|Frustrated Virgin]]?!

*'''Q: Would life be better if we reproduced nonsexually, and thus didn't have a sex drive?'''
::A: That is Bull[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|c***]].

*'''Q: Since you haven't been very specific about your taste in women, who are your favorite porn stars?'''
::A: To name a few: [[Wikipedia:Jenna Jameson|Jenna Jameson]], [[Wikipedia:Daisy Marie|Daisy Marie]] and [[Wikipedia:Carmen Luvana|Carmen Luvana]].

*'''Q: Do you have any friends in the Autistic community?'''
::A: Only a few Acquaintances.

==20 January 2010==

*'''Q: Have you ever considered the possibility that you may never lose your virginity? What will you do then? How old do you think is too old to be a virgin?'''
::A: No. The next question is Non-Applicable. 40.

*'''Q: If you could have sex with one famous woman, living or historical, who would it be?'''
::A: [[Britney Spears]].

*'''Q: Why do you think [[Asperchu]] currently has 10 times as many fans as Sonichu?'''
::A: "Fans" are fickle, and so are "Fads"; the Non-True Fans will always look for the Next "Fad" until they tire of it and move on to the next "Fad". In this note, I would say that I am Possibly Retro, and [[Chris and Fashion|Retro is ALWAYS IN]].

*'''Q: Would you say your life has improved since thinking up Sonichu? Why or why not?'''
::A: [[Chris and his ego|Yes; I became famous,]] and becoming famous is not an easy task.

*'''Q: Do you know what the word "[[Chris and hypocrisy|hypocrite]]" means?'''
::A: "hypocrite"; an adjective; 1) to be of a belief while not upholding that belief. 2) a total liar. 3) an UNTRUE Fan. example: When the Sonichu Fan left Sonichu for a [[Asperchu|newer, yet badly drawn, thing]], after having said that they would always enjoy Sonichu forever, is a '''hypocrite''' among the Truest and Loyalest Sonichu Fans.

*'''Q: I noticed that you have a Marge [[Simpson]] poster on your wall. Do you find her sexually appealing and if yes why?'''
::A: That is the pin-up from a "Playboy" a few months ago. She is appealing, yes, but I am more attracted to the real-life women around us all.

*'''Q: What's with all the pictures of Rosechu with a pickle on the internet? I thought she was supposed to be ALL WOMAN?'''
::A: Rosechu IS All Woman; she transformed from a Female Raichu; those people are just being stupid jerks with such "renditions".

*'''Q: How do you expect to keep us last remaining fans by stop working on the comic pages?'''
::A: I am drawing pages every day; just be patient and have full faith, unless you want to be considered a '''hypocrite''' among True, Loyal Sonichu and Rosechu Fans.

==26 January 2010==
*'''Q: If Rosechu is a Raichu, that means she's more evolved then Sonichu, who is a Pikachu. Shouldn't she be more powerful than Sonichu and be the leader?'''
::A: Evolution makes no difference; Rosechu is equally as powerful as Sonichu; Sonichu is the main character; Rosechu has equal leadership roles, so [[Women's rights|she leads when appropriate]].

*'''Q: Why do you think you are better artist than [[Alec Benson Leary|Alec]], aside from low-resolution and his style's blockiness? Is there something wrong to have quirky and blocky drawing style?'''
::A: How about the fact that his style looks Retarded and something that [[Chris and hypocrisy|a 2-Year Old can do]]? There's nothing wrong, unless you want to be TRULY Respected as an Avid Artist and Serious Person.

*'''Q: Why is [[Flame the Sunbird]] a ripoff of Kazooie?'''
::A: Flame was NEVER taken from Kazooie; if anything, he is MORE similar to Knuckles, but with a Sunbird Form.

*'''Q: You have expressed disdain for Asperchu and Simonchu, but how do you feel about [[Fan:Moon-Pals|Moon-Pals]]? Have you read it? If not, it would only be fair for you to do so.'''
::A: I have read Moon-Pals, and I feel that it is more like Moon-Dorks the way Sean draws and Portrays their Events so Grotesquely.

*'''Q: How many fans do you think you have? Please specify one of the following options: 0-10, 11-100, 101-1000, 1001-10000, 10000+.'''
::A: [[Ego|1000000000+.]]

*'''Q: How many fans do you think Asperchu has? Please specify one of the following options: 0-10, 11-100, 101-1000, 1001-10000, 10000+.'''
::A: 0-10
''Chris left this last question unanswered until 30 January.''

==30 January 2010==
*'''Q: Will you ever be able to accept criticism without being condescending or changing the subject?'''
::A: Yes.

*'''Q: Capital punishment (the Death Penalty) is legal in the Commonwealth of Virginia. Do you support the death penalty?'''
::A: [[9 February 2010|I do not support the death penalty]].

*'''Q: Could you post the letter you sent to Barack Obama on the CWCipedia?'''
::A: I am afraid I did not make a photocopy of the letter, and I had snail-mailed it weeks ago, so I can not do that.

*'''Q: You talk about how [[Asperchu]] is just a fad, but what if Sonichu is actually the fad that's starting to fade?'''
::A: I disagree.

*'''Q: If Rosechu is equal to Sonichu in power why does she need to be saved by him?'''
::A: She was caught off-guard at those times.

==1 February 2010==
*'''Q: Why do people who "[[Mailbag 49#Apparently that's reason enough|tick you off]]" [[Mailbag 49#Chris loves his country|deserve to die in explosions]]? Didn't Matthew say to love thy enemy?'''
::A: I never said that phrase, nor meant it in any way.

*'''Q: If you don't support the death penalty, that means you believe all life is sacred, right? Then why do you call for the deaths of gays? Is it only straight people who shouldn't get the death penalty?'''
::A: [[Death threats|All Life IS sacred]].

*'''Q: How come you become more and more like a dictator like Kim Jong Il, Hugo Chavez, or Vladimir Putin with your mailbags?'''
::A: I am NOT a Dictator. Why are you giving me an even WORSE Mislabeling than the Homosexual Mislabelings? Why do YOU have to be so bored that you have to make up NEW mislabelings to try and deface me over and over again?

*'''Q: Why did you choose to show the first black character in the series in a negative and racist light?'''
::A: That one is NOT a recurring character; the one who WILL be recurring characters are and will be like [[Jerkop|Police Officers]] like Louis Perez.

*'''Q: Why did [[Ultra Sonichu]] cure Aspergers, but did nothing for the physically challenged Rosechus in CWCville?'''
::A: Mental Problems can be cured Easier than Physical.

*'''Q: Why do you constantly edit the letters you receive? Don't you think it is insulting and rude?'''
::A: I am working on that, and Editing Less.

*'''Q: Do you like zombies? What weapon would you use to defend yourself in the zombie apocalypse? Where would you hold out?'''
::A: No, I do not like zombies. I would use a [[Megatron pistol|Gun]]. [[14 Branchland Court|Where I can]].

*'''Q: If you claim to respect your fans, why is it okay for you to "promise" to do a Sonichu page everyday, and then not keep up on that promise?'''
::A: I am [[Chris and art|drawing the pages For Real]]; Hand-to-God. I have other life problems that delay me from getting them scanned and online sooner; Shoveling Snow, Chores, Earlier Bedtime and Routine Resituating.

*'''Q: Why don't you just draw [[Wild]] a new girlfriend, so you can remove [[Simonla]] like [[Evan]] asked you to? Most people have more than one relationship in their lives, so it should not be that much of a problem. Or a you so uncreative that you can not think of a new character?'''
::A: I have stated before that when ONE finds [[Boyfriend-free girl|their Match]], they KEEP Each Other; I am NOT going to separate the Couple.

==22 February 2010==
*'''Q: How come your comics art hasn't improved since 2005, do you think you've reached your limit when it's come to the art of the Sonichu comic?'''
::A: On the contrary, my [[Chris and art|drawing skills]] have improved greatly over the years, yet it may be subtle and not obvious.

*'''Q: Why do you have a bedtime when you are around 30 years old?'''
::A: Everybody needs to sleep a while to recover energy from the past day.

*'''Q: What do you think of legally blind people?'''
::A: They're okay; they are keen to their other senses, and that is admirable. I have neutral to positive opinions of the legally blind.

*'''Q: Hey, Chris, what were your favorite after-school activities when you were a kid?'''
::A: Video games and Homework.

*'''Q: Were you ever involved in sports besides being the basketball towelboy, or did you take music lessons or art classes outside of school?'''
::A: I took a lot of Physical Education classes; I did not take classes outside of school before college.

*'''Q: If you can't get your car out because of the snow, shouldn't now be the perfect time to work on updating your comic?'''
::A: I have been working on the comic the whole time, as you will see very soon.

*'''Q: What's your favorite food? Does your mom ever cook at home? If she asked you to fix dinner, what would you do?'''
::A: Macaroni and Cheese; Yes; a small meal or soup.

*'''Q: Are there any video games out right now that you really want to play, but haven't gotten a chance to yet?'''
::A: [[Fanmail Reading|The Orange Box]], [[God of War]] III and Heavy Rain.
::''Note: neither God of War III nor [[Wikipedia:Heavy Rain|Heavy Rain]] had been released when Chris answered this question.''

*'''Q: If you could change anything about yourself physically, what would you change and why?'''
::A: Weigh myself down to 180 pounds.

*'''Q: How often do you shower?'''
::A: [[Chris and health#Chris and hygiene|Nightly]].

*'''Q: How often do you visit with friends and family outside of the house?'''
::A: Sometimes.

*'''Q: Do you enjoy [[20 December 2009|playing with your cats]]?'''
::A: Yes.

*'''Q: Do you actually play with all the [[toys]] in your room? If not, why not donate some to children who actually will play with them?'''
::A: I do sometimes play with all my toys.

*'''Q: Do you envy Sonichu for having a wife and kids?'''
::A: No.

*'''Q: Which of the Rosechus is the sexiest in your opinion?'''
::A: The Original Rosechu.

*'''Q: If shoveling snow is that hard for you, why don't you just pay some kid $10 to shovel your driveway?'''
::A: Hard work is good for me.

*'''Q: From between Issues #0 and #8 Which Electric Hedgehog pokemon do you like least and why?'''
::A: Silvana Rosechu, because of the Troll Influences, I felt forced to let Graduon magically make her a hermaphrodite for the sake of "TRANSFORM".

*'''Q: Have any of the Sonichus and Rosechus ever considered "swinging," aka swapping sex partners for the night?'''
::A: No.

*'''Q: What are the ten worst things that have happened to you in your life?'''
::A: 1) Trolls Pestering Me Constantly. 2) [[Julie|Learning that Ohio woman was actually a 13-year old boy]]. 3) Having my accounts hacked into. 4) Clyde Cash breaking into my ORIGINAL, which hosted The Original "[[CWC's Sonichu Site!|CWC's Sonichu Site]]", Tripod Account and screwing it up Royally. 5) Being banned from [[The GAMe PLACe|The (Game & Hobby) Place]] by that S.O.B., '''[[Michael Snyder]]'''; we never saw eye-to-eye, and for [[Chris and anger|some UNCOMPREHENDIBLE Reason]], aside from that time with my Wii, He Hated Me, Period. 6) Learning of the [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] Website late October, 2007, followed by learning [[Lucas|TWO OF]] [[Mimms|THE TROLLS]] were old Pok'emon TCG comrades in that same League I used to go to HAD PART in the creation of that D*** E.D. Page. 7) The loss of two True and Good Women who I had friendships with, Sarah Cassandra McKenzie ([[PandaHalo]]), and [[Sarah Jackson]]. 8) Being banned from [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]] for a year. 9) Having to leave behind all of my [[Gal-pal|Girl Friends]] from High School after Graduation. 10) [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|Being pinned down on the floor by a teacher, two teacher aides, the Guidance Counsoler and the Principal on the floor and having my screams and cries recorded onto audiocassete back in 4th Grade]]. [[Fail|11)]] The [[Autism]].

*'''Q: Chris, what are the good deeds you have done that earn you the right to go to heaven?'''
::A: I have done a lot of good in my life, yet I did some bad, [[Chris and remorse|most of which was accidental, unintentional or beyond my knowledge]]. To name a few good things: holding the door for many people in various places, [[Chris and Death#Mike Jackson (1969-2010)|honoring my promises]], [[Chris and anger|being friendly and kind in person]], [[Chris and money|donating to various causes and a lot of other good things]].

*'''Q: Why does homosexuality immediately condemn the person to hell regardless of how good they are?'''
::A: I can not say; ask a Priest or Pastor.

*'''Q: At what age did you officially become mayor of CWCville?'''
::A: 18

*'''Q: At what age will your future daughter inherit the title of mayor of CWCville?'''
::A: 13 - 18

*'''Q: You know that crystal isn't a kind of metal, right?'''
::A: I know that; cyrstal is a kind of Mineral.

*'''Q: Who came up with the "Chris Chan" nickname?'''
::A: I did; it's the first halves of my first and last names, Chris tian Chan dler, and it has a "Jackie Chan" feel to it.

*'''Q: What inspired you to create Sonichu?'''
::A: The [[Christian's Favorite Hits!|CD Cover Project]] for Computer Graphics during my [[Chris and english|Seinor]] Year at Manchester High; Sonic and Pikachu.

*'''Q: Even though you've created him for over a decade, did Sonichu ever helped you accomplished anything?'''
::A: Yes; see myself as a better person.

*'''Q: Why did the Wailord dropped a boulder on [[Bubbles Rosechu|Bubble]]'s adoptive mother Swampert?'''
::A: the boulder was attached to that Wailord's underbelly, like Barnicles, and in its leap over Mama Swampert, the boulder detached itself.

*'''Q: Since you hate gay people so much, why do you use [[Rainbow]]s in your comics?'''
::A: I do not understand why the f*** the gays decided to use Rainbows as their symbol; that's like asking Hitler why he used the Swastika (which originally was a Lucky Symbol) for his whole mess.

*'''Q: What purpose have the [[Chaotic Combo]] served through out the whole comic?'''
::A: It's like asking why [[Sailor Moon]] needed the Sailor Soldiers of the other 8 planets; BACKUP, ADVICE and COMRADESHIP.

*'''Q: Why do you add yourself as a character?'''
::A: If it was good enough for Shinichi Watanabe in [[Excel Saga]] and Puni Puni Poemy, [[Chris and his Ego|it was good enough for me]]. But upon retrospect, I saw why it was a mistake.

==Awaiting Answers==
===From [[Mailbag 58]]===
*'''Q: What do you think of people who read both Sonichu and Asperchu? Do you think they are loyal fans?

*'''Q: Have you considered letting more comic series onto the the [[CWCipedia]]?

*'''Q: Would you date someone who loved the Xbox as much as you love [[PS3]] and hates PS3 as much as you do the [[Xbox]]?

*'''Q: If only [[slow in the minds]] could be turned into [[jerkops]], why didn't you get turned into one?

*'''Q: Why do you refuse to buy your father nice gifts and just settle for cheap candy or even nothing?

*'''Q: You say you're against the death penalty, so why is it that in your most recent comic pages you decided to kill off the Asperpedia crew?

*'''Q: Do you wish you could punish the Asperpals in real life the same way you did in your most recent comic book?

*'''Q: Why are things a fact when said by you, but an opinion when said by others?

*'''Q: What has been your greatest victory over the trolls?

*'''Q: What has been your biggest defeat at the hands of [[trolls]]?

===From [[Mailbag 59]]===
*'''Q:Why do you put Sonichu on your [[resume]] if you don't want it to be a job?

{{Mailbag}}

File:105-LonesomeSelf.jpg

2010-10-28T04:16:24Z

IconOfEvi:

[[Category: Scrapbook images]]
[[Category: Custom Yu-Gi-Oh! cards]]

...but isn't the point of this card to demonstrate how he is LONELY?

File:140-AJerk.jpg

2010-10-28T03:43:30Z

IconOfEvi:

[[Category: Scrapbook images]]
[[Category: Custom Yu-Gi-Oh! cards]]

Female monsters will only attack the JERK? Stop dreaming Chris. Not that they'd get very far with those 2000 attack points.

File:ECP 00025.jpg

2010-10-28T03:34:08Z

IconOfEvi:

MOTHAFUCK DA POLICE, [[straight|STRAIGHT]] FROM THE [[14 Branchland Court|UNDERGROUND]]

United States of America

2010-10-28T03:27:16Z

IconOfEvi: /* Chris for President? */

{{Quote|Okay, I don't know the words, but I am being patriotic here!|Chris, [[Red Letter CWC Certified Day|forgetting the national anthem]].}}

[[File:SonichuFlag.png|thumb|Christian's primary thoughts on the U.S....]]

[[Chris]] is a citizen of the '''United States of America''', a federal democratic republic in the western hemisphere. The nation is considered the only remaining [[China|superpower]] since the end of the cold war, and is a leading economic, political, and cultural force in the world.

Chris's stance on the nation he lives in is inconsistent at best. While he claims to be a good citizen who loves and respects his country, his [[Twin Falling Towers|actions]] are often [[Chris and Hypocrisy|very obviously]] contrary to these claims.

==Politics==

[[File:Cwcflag1.png|thumb|...Christian's ''other'' thoughts on the U.S...]]

At a glance, Chris's sense of politics seem very inconsistent; on some issues, he takes a very conservative stance, on others a very liberal one. While many people have an independent or bipartisan opinion, one has to realize the true nature of Chris's decision-making: that Chris doesn't favor what's good for America, but rather what's good for Chris (and believes the [[Chris and his ego| two ends are one and the same]]). As such, he's against gay marriage because he hates da [[homos]] and supported [[Barack Obama]] because he saw himself in him, before he accused him of [[Chris and race|selling out the country to brown-skinned people]].{{cite}}

Soon after, he clarified that he [[Mailbag 20#Chris on abortion|supports abortion]], undoubtedly to show his appreciation for [[Women's Rights]]. Another recent political insight is the vague statement [[Mailbag 4|'I agree with gun control']], despite Chris's numerous [[death threats]] and [[Sonichu Special 4| vigilante plans]] that would require a firearm.

Chris proclaims himself to be a "moderate". While typically this simply means not having extreme or overly partisan political beliefs, he takes this as a general-purpose response to all questions about politics, including ones that have no defined middle path. Nowhere is this more apparent than in the [[Mailbags]], where Chris will often dodge giving his opinion on issues ''every'' voter should have an opinion on, simply because ''he has no opinion.''

Chris doesn't react well in situations where he absolutely has to make a choice ([[Julie Reveals Herself|Julie or PSN? A question for the ages!]]), and seems easily persuaded on matters that he doesn't really have a stake on. As a result, he often comes across as a weathervane, just repeating whatever opinion has most recently lodged itself in his head. His changing opinion about Obama is a good example of this, as he has echoed the sentiments from his father, a documentary, and then from his father again, adopting a positive and negative stance based on what he hears; he never really stops to make a summary and decide what points really matter to ''him''.

==Understanding of government==

Chris's grasp of how the government works, much like Chris's grasp on [[reality]] as a whole, is shaky at best. One of the most telling examples of this is his ignorant stance on taxation and [[Monthly tugboat|welfare]]. Because Chris is jobless, he pays no taxes and presumably files no tax returns. However, he still thinks of himself as a contributing member of society, because he pays ''sales taxes'' on the massive amount of crap he buys.

{{Quote|My spending that money ends up going to others who get such welfare and all as well.... I am sharing the wealth with others who are on that tugboat as well.|Chris, [[Mailbag 34#In which Chris fails economics forever|explaining why he deserves free money]].}}

It's highly unlikely that Chris understands the massive discrepancy between the amount the government pays him and the amount he gives back via sales tax. Chris also fails to understand that sales taxes are collected by state and local governments, while his welfare check comes from the federal government.

Chris also seems to have difficulty understanding what the true purpose of government actually is. The U.S. government's duty is to follow the will of the majority while respecting the rights of the minority, to protect its citizens from danger, and to ensure the continued prosperity of the nation. Chris, however, would like it to become a force for social engineering that would make the most rabid totalitarian shudder. When asked hypothetical questions about what he would do if he were running things, he proposes bizarre sweeping laws that single out [[Homos|certain minorities]] and force individuals into relationships whether they want to be in one or not.

{{Quote|All Men and Women would be paired up in straight couples, leaving none alone; any remaining will be saved for upcoming men/women respectively. All gays would be reprogrammed and encouraged to be straight.|Chris [[Common Questions#28 December 2009|on effective leadership]].}}

The fact that this would not help the country at all, and in fact could possibly destroy society as we know it, does not factor into Chris's thinking. By his logic, since he wants a girlfriend, ''everybody'' must want a girlfriend, and if everybody wants a girlfriend, the government needs to make it happen.

Over the years, Chris has proposed a large number of laws, even sending letters to President [[Barack Obama]] demanding legislation against [[trolls]] and [[homos]]. This is completely useless for two reasons: one, the President of the United States has much more pressing concerns than making an insane manchild in Ruckersville, VA, happy, and two, the US President ''can't make laws''. (Separation of powers and checks and balances in government are concepts Chris has no time for — [[CWCville]], after all, is a hereditary dictatorship.)

Oddly, the closest analog for how Chris views his government is how Chris views his [[religion]]. He treats both the US government and God as things that can be completely ignored unless he has a personal problem, at which point they should immediately step in and help. He believes that both have a deeply vested interest in himself, often at the expense of everybody else. God should damn [[Clyde Cash]], and the FBI should arrest him. It doesn't matter that Clyde hasn't done anything the FBI would be terribly interested in; Chris is mad at him, and that's all that matters.

== Chris on patriotism ==

As established, Chris has a very [[naïve]] view of American politics, and how the federal government operates. Despite these setbacks, Chris has developed a unique brand of patriotism his brings up quite often, usually either in defense of his character or dehumanization of his [[Trolls|enemies]]. As a result, these stabs at jingoism often feel forced or out of place. Chris has utilized this tactic in [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]], with the iconic "Clarksville Address":

{{quote|Yes, sir, my loving, caring [[Sweetheart]] and I have come to discuss the web page in question. We humbly request that it would be removed from the internet for good. For you are not just dragging Christian Weston Chandler's name in the mud, you also drag the American hopes and dreams and ideas of the majority of these great, humble United States of America along with him.|Sonichu, [[Sonichu 8|delivering the Clarksville Address]]}}

[[Image:CWCVictoryForIvy.jpg|thumb|Chris bastardizing the American flag with his favorite shirt]]

Here, we can see the prime factor in Chris's logic. Namely, that [[Song of Christian| his problems are analogous with the problems of every American]]. Therefore, if [[ED]] satirizes him, they insult all US citizens. This would become something of a recurring theme, with a later [[Do Not Dis C Ville|video]] claiming that any attack on Chris or [[CWCville|his fictional utopia]] was equivalent to mocking any 'C-ville' in America. On a shallower level, it's an obvious ploy for sympathy, a facade of reasonable nationalism that aims to make him the 'good guy', and by extension, [[Jason]] the 'bad guy'. Thus, patriotic symbolism is thrown in, without really even considering whether or not it makes sense in context. Chris is patriotic simply because he believes that's what will win him [[Scale of Respect|respect]] and reprieve.

His attempts to prove his patriotism are undermined, however, by his [[Twin Falling Towers|tendency to mock national tragedies]] and [[Chris and music|complete inability to sing even the most well-known patriotic songs.]] If anything, Chris's attempts to prove himself a "true American" end up having the ''opposite'' effect.

However, his bumbling enthusiasm isn't reserved for the USA alone. Like many Americans, Chris has developed a fake lineage of European ancestry, starting from [[Anne Boleyn]], a Queen of England who was executed in 1536. This was almost instantly proven false when her ultimate descendant Queen Elizabeth I, who died in 1603 childless. Then Chris tried in vain to co-opt British, Scottish, and Irish national sentiment in his [[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!|kilt-clad tirade against Surfshack Tito]] as a means of intimidation. Also, while not a standard country per se, he also evoked his relation to the Cherokee Nation in his infamous [[War Paint Video|armed declaration of war against the trolls]]. Finally, Chris attempts to use the fact that February 24 is Mexico's Flag Day to justify [[Christian Love Day|turning his own birthday into a holiday]], an ''American'' holiday. Note that all of these cases, Chris's total ignorance of other nations means he [[Fail|fails]] spectacularly at representing them and appearing patriotic.
{{-}}

==Chris for President?==
[[File:CWCVilleTrueFlag.png|thumb|...and, what Chris's thoughts on America equate to!]]

In a [[A Public Announcement for Congress|more recent video]], Chris outlined his actions for what he would do if elected president. He declared he would [[Chris and money|cut taxes in half, build "soup hotels", give senior citizens increased funds for medications and special services]], restrict guns to law enforcement personnel only, [[homos|allow gay marriage]], and [[EXCLUSIVE Manchester High School 2000 Reunion Required NOW|form a special police force that focus's entirely on capturing internet trolls.]]

Aside from his failure to deliver a good speech, this video also showcases his complete and utter ignorance of how government and taxes work. [[Mailbag 18|Building luxury hotels for the homeless]] and increasing social security for [[Bob|senior citizens]] would cost a fortune to do, yet he also proposes cutting taxes in half, thus also reducing the amount of money the government can spend in half. Given that Chris probably has [[Honor Roll|no knowledge of economics]], he probably just assumes that money can be printed endlessly without fear of inflation (Of course, that's assuming he put any thought at all into his policies).

Chris's restrictions of guns to professionals only is a blatant violation of the 2nd amendment, which allows American citizens to own a gun for protection. While their are certain restrictions on who can own a gun and what type, a flat out ban on weapons for everyone would no doubt be found unconstitutional. Then again, Chris isn't exactly big on [[Homos|respecting]] [[alec benson leary|the]] [[Megan|rights]] [[Mailbag 31|of]] [[Niggos|others.]]

His departure from his previous stance on gay marriage is surprising ,but then again, he was influenced by a [[Jackie|certain someone]] when he made the video. Despite his decree of equal rights, he does finish up his point by imploring gays to [[Sex_tape|"keep it to yourselves in your room, just don't force it upon everybody"]], while normal straight couples can flaunt their heterosexuality to their heart's delight.

While taxes, government spending, gay marriage and gun control are all big issues, Chris finish's up his video by proposing his most important change: the establishment of a special "trollbusters" unit of [[Chris and the law|law enforcement]], apparently dedicated to finding trolls who make fun of people online, and incarcerating them. While a cyber crime's unit already exists for the FBI, they spend their time pursuing real criminals like pedophiles and scam artists, not people who make fun of [[Chris|retarded inbred cry-babies]].

The fact that Chris has complained to law enforcement previously, and they have not done anything about it, leads Chris to believe that it must not exist, [[ego|otherwise they would be spending all their resources tracking down the people who make fun of him]]. The fact that Chris is willing to suspend constitutional rights, and spend countless millions on to incarcerate people that make fun of him, is proof that Chris is neither a republican, democrat or moderate. He's more of a fascist.

TLDR, Chris's ideal America is an America where he is in charge, the Bill of Rights only applies when he feels like it should, and his birthday is a national holiday. In other words, his ideal America is North Korea.

Kim Il-Sung would be proud!

==See also==
*[[American Rabbit]]

[[Category:Chris-chan]]

United States of America

2010-10-28T03:26:53Z

IconOfEvi: /* Chris for President? */

{{Quote|Okay, I don't know the words, but I am being patriotic here!|Chris, [[Red Letter CWC Certified Day|forgetting the national anthem]].}}

[[File:SonichuFlag.png|thumb|Christian's primary thoughts on the U.S....]]

[[Chris]] is a citizen of the '''United States of America''', a federal democratic republic in the western hemisphere. The nation is considered the only remaining [[China|superpower]] since the end of the cold war, and is a leading economic, political, and cultural force in the world.

Chris's stance on the nation he lives in is inconsistent at best. While he claims to be a good citizen who loves and respects his country, his [[Twin Falling Towers|actions]] are often [[Chris and Hypocrisy|very obviously]] contrary to these claims.

==Politics==

[[File:Cwcflag1.png|thumb|...Christian's ''other'' thoughts on the U.S...]]

At a glance, Chris's sense of politics seem very inconsistent; on some issues, he takes a very conservative stance, on others a very liberal one. While many people have an independent or bipartisan opinion, one has to realize the true nature of Chris's decision-making: that Chris doesn't favor what's good for America, but rather what's good for Chris (and believes the [[Chris and his ego| two ends are one and the same]]). As such, he's against gay marriage because he hates da [[homos]] and supported [[Barack Obama]] because he saw himself in him, before he accused him of [[Chris and race|selling out the country to brown-skinned people]].{{cite}}

Soon after, he clarified that he [[Mailbag 20#Chris on abortion|supports abortion]], undoubtedly to show his appreciation for [[Women's Rights]]. Another recent political insight is the vague statement [[Mailbag 4|'I agree with gun control']], despite Chris's numerous [[death threats]] and [[Sonichu Special 4| vigilante plans]] that would require a firearm.

Chris proclaims himself to be a "moderate". While typically this simply means not having extreme or overly partisan political beliefs, he takes this as a general-purpose response to all questions about politics, including ones that have no defined middle path. Nowhere is this more apparent than in the [[Mailbags]], where Chris will often dodge giving his opinion on issues ''every'' voter should have an opinion on, simply because ''he has no opinion.''

Chris doesn't react well in situations where he absolutely has to make a choice ([[Julie Reveals Herself|Julie or PSN? A question for the ages!]]), and seems easily persuaded on matters that he doesn't really have a stake on. As a result, he often comes across as a weathervane, just repeating whatever opinion has most recently lodged itself in his head. His changing opinion about Obama is a good example of this, as he has echoed the sentiments from his father, a documentary, and then from his father again, adopting a positive and negative stance based on what he hears; he never really stops to make a summary and decide what points really matter to ''him''.

==Understanding of government==

Chris's grasp of how the government works, much like Chris's grasp on [[reality]] as a whole, is shaky at best. One of the most telling examples of this is his ignorant stance on taxation and [[Monthly tugboat|welfare]]. Because Chris is jobless, he pays no taxes and presumably files no tax returns. However, he still thinks of himself as a contributing member of society, because he pays ''sales taxes'' on the massive amount of crap he buys.

{{Quote|My spending that money ends up going to others who get such welfare and all as well.... I am sharing the wealth with others who are on that tugboat as well.|Chris, [[Mailbag 34#In which Chris fails economics forever|explaining why he deserves free money]].}}

It's highly unlikely that Chris understands the massive discrepancy between the amount the government pays him and the amount he gives back via sales tax. Chris also fails to understand that sales taxes are collected by state and local governments, while his welfare check comes from the federal government.

Chris also seems to have difficulty understanding what the true purpose of government actually is. The U.S. government's duty is to follow the will of the majority while respecting the rights of the minority, to protect its citizens from danger, and to ensure the continued prosperity of the nation. Chris, however, would like it to become a force for social engineering that would make the most rabid totalitarian shudder. When asked hypothetical questions about what he would do if he were running things, he proposes bizarre sweeping laws that single out [[Homos|certain minorities]] and force individuals into relationships whether they want to be in one or not.

{{Quote|All Men and Women would be paired up in straight couples, leaving none alone; any remaining will be saved for upcoming men/women respectively. All gays would be reprogrammed and encouraged to be straight.|Chris [[Common Questions#28 December 2009|on effective leadership]].}}

The fact that this would not help the country at all, and in fact could possibly destroy society as we know it, does not factor into Chris's thinking. By his logic, since he wants a girlfriend, ''everybody'' must want a girlfriend, and if everybody wants a girlfriend, the government needs to make it happen.

Over the years, Chris has proposed a large number of laws, even sending letters to President [[Barack Obama]] demanding legislation against [[trolls]] and [[homos]]. This is completely useless for two reasons: one, the President of the United States has much more pressing concerns than making an insane manchild in Ruckersville, VA, happy, and two, the US President ''can't make laws''. (Separation of powers and checks and balances in government are concepts Chris has no time for — [[CWCville]], after all, is a hereditary dictatorship.)

Oddly, the closest analog for how Chris views his government is how Chris views his [[religion]]. He treats both the US government and God as things that can be completely ignored unless he has a personal problem, at which point they should immediately step in and help. He believes that both have a deeply vested interest in himself, often at the expense of everybody else. God should damn [[Clyde Cash]], and the FBI should arrest him. It doesn't matter that Clyde hasn't done anything the FBI would be terribly interested in; Chris is mad at him, and that's all that matters.

== Chris on patriotism ==

As established, Chris has a very [[naïve]] view of American politics, and how the federal government operates. Despite these setbacks, Chris has developed a unique brand of patriotism his brings up quite often, usually either in defense of his character or dehumanization of his [[Trolls|enemies]]. As a result, these stabs at jingoism often feel forced or out of place. Chris has utilized this tactic in [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]], with the iconic "Clarksville Address":

{{quote|Yes, sir, my loving, caring [[Sweetheart]] and I have come to discuss the web page in question. We humbly request that it would be removed from the internet for good. For you are not just dragging Christian Weston Chandler's name in the mud, you also drag the American hopes and dreams and ideas of the majority of these great, humble United States of America along with him.|Sonichu, [[Sonichu 8|delivering the Clarksville Address]]}}

[[Image:CWCVictoryForIvy.jpg|thumb|Chris bastardizing the American flag with his favorite shirt]]

Here, we can see the prime factor in Chris's logic. Namely, that [[Song of Christian| his problems are analogous with the problems of every American]]. Therefore, if [[ED]] satirizes him, they insult all US citizens. This would become something of a recurring theme, with a later [[Do Not Dis C Ville|video]] claiming that any attack on Chris or [[CWCville|his fictional utopia]] was equivalent to mocking any 'C-ville' in America. On a shallower level, it's an obvious ploy for sympathy, a facade of reasonable nationalism that aims to make him the 'good guy', and by extension, [[Jason]] the 'bad guy'. Thus, patriotic symbolism is thrown in, without really even considering whether or not it makes sense in context. Chris is patriotic simply because he believes that's what will win him [[Scale of Respect|respect]] and reprieve.

His attempts to prove his patriotism are undermined, however, by his [[Twin Falling Towers|tendency to mock national tragedies]] and [[Chris and music|complete inability to sing even the most well-known patriotic songs.]] If anything, Chris's attempts to prove himself a "true American" end up having the ''opposite'' effect.

However, his bumbling enthusiasm isn't reserved for the USA alone. Like many Americans, Chris has developed a fake lineage of European ancestry, starting from [[Anne Boleyn]], a Queen of England who was executed in 1536. This was almost instantly proven false when her ultimate descendant Queen Elizabeth I, who died in 1603 childless. Then Chris tried in vain to co-opt British, Scottish, and Irish national sentiment in his [[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!|kilt-clad tirade against Surfshack Tito]] as a means of intimidation. Also, while not a standard country per se, he also evoked his relation to the Cherokee Nation in his infamous [[War Paint Video|armed declaration of war against the trolls]]. Finally, Chris attempts to use the fact that February 24 is Mexico's Flag Day to justify [[Christian Love Day|turning his own birthday into a holiday]], an ''American'' holiday. Note that all of these cases, Chris's total ignorance of other nations means he [[Fail|fails]] spectacularly at representing them and appearing patriotic.
{{-}}

==Chris for President?==
[[File:CWCVilleTrueFlag.png|thumb|...and, what Chris's thought on America equate to.]]

In a [[A Public Announcement for Congress|more recent video]], Chris outlined his actions for what he would do if elected president. He declared he would [[Chris and money|cut taxes in half, build "soup hotels", give senior citizens increased funds for medications and special services]], restrict guns to law enforcement personnel only, [[homos|allow gay marriage]], and [[EXCLUSIVE Manchester High School 2000 Reunion Required NOW|form a special police force that focus's entirely on capturing internet trolls.]]

Aside from his failure to deliver a good speech, this video also showcases his complete and utter ignorance of how government and taxes work. [[Mailbag 18|Building luxury hotels for the homeless]] and increasing social security for [[Bob|senior citizens]] would cost a fortune to do, yet he also proposes cutting taxes in half, thus also reducing the amount of money the government can spend in half. Given that Chris probably has [[Honor Roll|no knowledge of economics]], he probably just assumes that money can be printed endlessly without fear of inflation (Of course, that's assuming he put any thought at all into his policies).

Chris's restrictions of guns to professionals only is a blatant violation of the 2nd amendment, which allows American citizens to own a gun for protection. While their are certain restrictions on who can own a gun and what type, a flat out ban on weapons for everyone would no doubt be found unconstitutional. Then again, Chris isn't exactly big on [[Homos|respecting]] [[alec benson leary|the]] [[Megan|rights]] [[Mailbag 31|of]] [[Niggos|others.]]

His departure from his previous stance on gay marriage is surprising ,but then again, he was influenced by a [[Jackie|certain someone]] when he made the video. Despite his decree of equal rights, he does finish up his point by imploring gays to [[Sex_tape|"keep it to yourselves in your room, just don't force it upon everybody"]], while normal straight couples can flaunt their heterosexuality to their heart's delight.

While taxes, government spending, gay marriage and gun control are all big issues, Chris finish's up his video by proposing his most important change: the establishment of a special "trollbusters" unit of [[Chris and the law|law enforcement]], apparently dedicated to finding trolls who make fun of people online, and incarcerating them. While a cyber crime's unit already exists for the FBI, they spend their time pursuing real criminals like pedophiles and scam artists, not people who make fun of [[Chris|retarded inbred cry-babies]].

The fact that Chris has complained to law enforcement previously, and they have not done anything about it, leads Chris to believe that it must not exist, [[ego|otherwise they would be spending all their resources tracking down the people who make fun of him]]. The fact that Chris is willing to suspend constitutional rights, and spend countless millions on to incarcerate people that make fun of him, is proof that Chris is neither a republican, democrat or moderate. He's more of a fascist.

TLDR, Chris's ideal America is an America where he is in charge, the Bill of Rights only applies when he feels like it should, and his birthday is a national holiday. In other words, his ideal America is North Korea.

Kim Il-Sung would be proud!

==See also==
*[[American Rabbit]]

[[Category:Chris-chan]]

United States of America

2010-10-28T03:26:19Z

IconOfEvi: /* Politics */

{{Quote|Okay, I don't know the words, but I am being patriotic here!|Chris, [[Red Letter CWC Certified Day|forgetting the national anthem]].}}

[[File:SonichuFlag.png|thumb|Christian's primary thoughts on the U.S....]]

[[Chris]] is a citizen of the '''United States of America''', a federal democratic republic in the western hemisphere. The nation is considered the only remaining [[China|superpower]] since the end of the cold war, and is a leading economic, political, and cultural force in the world.

Chris's stance on the nation he lives in is inconsistent at best. While he claims to be a good citizen who loves and respects his country, his [[Twin Falling Towers|actions]] are often [[Chris and Hypocrisy|very obviously]] contrary to these claims.

==Politics==

[[File:Cwcflag1.png|thumb|...Christian's ''other'' thoughts on the U.S...]]

At a glance, Chris's sense of politics seem very inconsistent; on some issues, he takes a very conservative stance, on others a very liberal one. While many people have an independent or bipartisan opinion, one has to realize the true nature of Chris's decision-making: that Chris doesn't favor what's good for America, but rather what's good for Chris (and believes the [[Chris and his ego| two ends are one and the same]]). As such, he's against gay marriage because he hates da [[homos]] and supported [[Barack Obama]] because he saw himself in him, before he accused him of [[Chris and race|selling out the country to brown-skinned people]].{{cite}}

Soon after, he clarified that he [[Mailbag 20#Chris on abortion|supports abortion]], undoubtedly to show his appreciation for [[Women's Rights]]. Another recent political insight is the vague statement [[Mailbag 4|'I agree with gun control']], despite Chris's numerous [[death threats]] and [[Sonichu Special 4| vigilante plans]] that would require a firearm.

Chris proclaims himself to be a "moderate". While typically this simply means not having extreme or overly partisan political beliefs, he takes this as a general-purpose response to all questions about politics, including ones that have no defined middle path. Nowhere is this more apparent than in the [[Mailbags]], where Chris will often dodge giving his opinion on issues ''every'' voter should have an opinion on, simply because ''he has no opinion.''

Chris doesn't react well in situations where he absolutely has to make a choice ([[Julie Reveals Herself|Julie or PSN? A question for the ages!]]), and seems easily persuaded on matters that he doesn't really have a stake on. As a result, he often comes across as a weathervane, just repeating whatever opinion has most recently lodged itself in his head. His changing opinion about Obama is a good example of this, as he has echoed the sentiments from his father, a documentary, and then from his father again, adopting a positive and negative stance based on what he hears; he never really stops to make a summary and decide what points really matter to ''him''.

==Understanding of government==

Chris's grasp of how the government works, much like Chris's grasp on [[reality]] as a whole, is shaky at best. One of the most telling examples of this is his ignorant stance on taxation and [[Monthly tugboat|welfare]]. Because Chris is jobless, he pays no taxes and presumably files no tax returns. However, he still thinks of himself as a contributing member of society, because he pays ''sales taxes'' on the massive amount of crap he buys.

{{Quote|My spending that money ends up going to others who get such welfare and all as well.... I am sharing the wealth with others who are on that tugboat as well.|Chris, [[Mailbag 34#In which Chris fails economics forever|explaining why he deserves free money]].}}

It's highly unlikely that Chris understands the massive discrepancy between the amount the government pays him and the amount he gives back via sales tax. Chris also fails to understand that sales taxes are collected by state and local governments, while his welfare check comes from the federal government.

Chris also seems to have difficulty understanding what the true purpose of government actually is. The U.S. government's duty is to follow the will of the majority while respecting the rights of the minority, to protect its citizens from danger, and to ensure the continued prosperity of the nation. Chris, however, would like it to become a force for social engineering that would make the most rabid totalitarian shudder. When asked hypothetical questions about what he would do if he were running things, he proposes bizarre sweeping laws that single out [[Homos|certain minorities]] and force individuals into relationships whether they want to be in one or not.

{{Quote|All Men and Women would be paired up in straight couples, leaving none alone; any remaining will be saved for upcoming men/women respectively. All gays would be reprogrammed and encouraged to be straight.|Chris [[Common Questions#28 December 2009|on effective leadership]].}}

The fact that this would not help the country at all, and in fact could possibly destroy society as we know it, does not factor into Chris's thinking. By his logic, since he wants a girlfriend, ''everybody'' must want a girlfriend, and if everybody wants a girlfriend, the government needs to make it happen.

Over the years, Chris has proposed a large number of laws, even sending letters to President [[Barack Obama]] demanding legislation against [[trolls]] and [[homos]]. This is completely useless for two reasons: one, the President of the United States has much more pressing concerns than making an insane manchild in Ruckersville, VA, happy, and two, the US President ''can't make laws''. (Separation of powers and checks and balances in government are concepts Chris has no time for — [[CWCville]], after all, is a hereditary dictatorship.)

Oddly, the closest analog for how Chris views his government is how Chris views his [[religion]]. He treats both the US government and God as things that can be completely ignored unless he has a personal problem, at which point they should immediately step in and help. He believes that both have a deeply vested interest in himself, often at the expense of everybody else. God should damn [[Clyde Cash]], and the FBI should arrest him. It doesn't matter that Clyde hasn't done anything the FBI would be terribly interested in; Chris is mad at him, and that's all that matters.

== Chris on patriotism ==

As established, Chris has a very [[naïve]] view of American politics, and how the federal government operates. Despite these setbacks, Chris has developed a unique brand of patriotism his brings up quite often, usually either in defense of his character or dehumanization of his [[Trolls|enemies]]. As a result, these stabs at jingoism often feel forced or out of place. Chris has utilized this tactic in [[Sonichu (comic)|Sonichu]], with the iconic "Clarksville Address":

{{quote|Yes, sir, my loving, caring [[Sweetheart]] and I have come to discuss the web page in question. We humbly request that it would be removed from the internet for good. For you are not just dragging Christian Weston Chandler's name in the mud, you also drag the American hopes and dreams and ideas of the majority of these great, humble United States of America along with him.|Sonichu, [[Sonichu 8|delivering the Clarksville Address]]}}

[[Image:CWCVictoryForIvy.jpg|thumb|Chris bastardizing the American flag with his favorite shirt]]

Here, we can see the prime factor in Chris's logic. Namely, that [[Song of Christian| his problems are analogous with the problems of every American]]. Therefore, if [[ED]] satirizes him, they insult all US citizens. This would become something of a recurring theme, with a later [[Do Not Dis C Ville|video]] claiming that any attack on Chris or [[CWCville|his fictional utopia]] was equivalent to mocking any 'C-ville' in America. On a shallower level, it's an obvious ploy for sympathy, a facade of reasonable nationalism that aims to make him the 'good guy', and by extension, [[Jason]] the 'bad guy'. Thus, patriotic symbolism is thrown in, without really even considering whether or not it makes sense in context. Chris is patriotic simply because he believes that's what will win him [[Scale of Respect|respect]] and reprieve.

His attempts to prove his patriotism are undermined, however, by his [[Twin Falling Towers|tendency to mock national tragedies]] and [[Chris and music|complete inability to sing even the most well-known patriotic songs.]] If anything, Chris's attempts to prove himself a "true American" end up having the ''opposite'' effect.

However, his bumbling enthusiasm isn't reserved for the USA alone. Like many Americans, Chris has developed a fake lineage of European ancestry, starting from [[Anne Boleyn]], a Queen of England who was executed in 1536. This was almost instantly proven false when her ultimate descendant Queen Elizabeth I, who died in 1603 childless. Then Chris tried in vain to co-opt British, Scottish, and Irish national sentiment in his [[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!|kilt-clad tirade against Surfshack Tito]] as a means of intimidation. Also, while not a standard country per se, he also evoked his relation to the Cherokee Nation in his infamous [[War Paint Video|armed declaration of war against the trolls]]. Finally, Chris attempts to use the fact that February 24 is Mexico's Flag Day to justify [[Christian Love Day|turning his own birthday into a holiday]], an ''American'' holiday. Note that all of these cases, Chris's total ignorance of other nations means he [[Fail|fails]] spectacularly at representing them and appearing patriotic.
{{-}}

==Chris for President?==
[[File:CWCVilleTrueFlag.png|thumb|...and, what Chris thinks the U.S. should be.]]
In a [[A Public Announcement for Congress|more recent video]], Chris outlined his actions for what he would do if elected president. He declared he would [[Chris and money|cut taxes in half, build "soup hotels", give senior citizens increased funds for medications and special services]], restrict guns to law enforcement personnel only, [[homos|allow gay marriage]], and [[EXCLUSIVE Manchester High School 2000 Reunion Required NOW|form a special police force that focus's entirely on capturing internet trolls.]]

Aside from his failure to deliver a good speech, this video also showcases his complete and utter ignorance of how government and taxes work. [[Mailbag 18|Building luxury hotels for the homeless]] and increasing social security for [[Bob|senior citizens]] would cost a fortune to do, yet he also proposes cutting taxes in half, thus also reducing the amount of money the government can spend in half. Given that Chris probably has [[Honor Roll|no knowledge of economics]], he probably just assumes that money can be printed endlessly without fear of inflation (Of course, that's assuming he put any thought at all into his policies).

Chris's restrictions of guns to professionals only is a blatant violation of the 2nd amendment, which allows American citizens to own a gun for protection. While their are certain restrictions on who can own a gun and what type, a flat out ban on weapons for everyone would no doubt be found unconstitutional. Then again, Chris isn't exactly big on [[Homos|respecting]] [[alec benson leary|the]] [[Megan|rights]] [[Mailbag 31|of]] [[Niggos|others.]]

His departure from his previous stance on gay marriage is surprising ,but then again, he was influenced by a [[Jackie|certain someone]] when he made the video. Despite his decree of equal rights, he does finish up his point by imploring gays to [[Sex_tape|"keep it to yourselves in your room, just don't force it upon everybody"]], while normal straight couples can flaunt their heterosexuality to their heart's delight.

While taxes, government spending, gay marriage and gun control are all big issues, Chris finish's up his video by proposing his most important change: the establishment of a special "trollbusters" unit of [[Chris and the law|law enforcement]], apparently dedicated to finding trolls who make fun of people online, and incarcerating them. While a cyber crime's unit already exists for the FBI, they spend their time pursuing real criminals like pedophiles and scam artists, not people who make fun of [[Chris|retarded inbred cry-babies]].

The fact that Chris has complained to law enforcement previously, and they have not done anything about it, leads Chris to believe that it must not exist, [[ego|otherwise they would be spending all their resources tracking down the people who make fun of him]]. The fact that Chris is willing to suspend constitutional rights, and spend countless millions on to incarcerate people that make fun of him, is proof that Chris is neither a republican, democrat or moderate. He's more of a fascist.

TLDR, Chris's ideal America is an America where he is in charge, the Bill of Rights only applies when he feels like it should, and his birthday is a national holiday. In other words, his ideal America is North Korea.

Kim Il-Sung would be proud!

==See also==
*[[American Rabbit]]

[[Category:Chris-chan]]

File:0231-MrsSanfordsWiseWords.jpg

2010-10-28T03:21:55Z

IconOfEvi:

[[Category: DVD slideshow images]]

Mrs Sanford, seeing the future, and trying to prevent it from happening.

If only he had listened.

File talk:CWCVilleTrueFlag.png

2010-10-28T00:53:04Z

IconOfEvi:

Figured I'd make a CWC rendition of the North Korean flag, since the society he wants is pretty much North Korea. Great Director Chandler is not very far off from Dear Leader. --[[User:IconOfEvi|IconOfEvi]] 17:52, 27 October 2010 (PDT)

File talk:CWCVilleTrueFlag.png

2010-10-28T00:52:28Z

IconOfEvi:

lol figured I'd make a CWC rendition of the North Korean flag, since the society he wants is pretty much North Korea. And Great Director Chandler is not very far off from Dear Leader. --[[User:IconOfEvi|IconOfEvi]] 17:52, 27 October 2010 (PDT)

File talk:CWCVilleTrueFlag.png

2010-10-28T00:52:07Z

IconOfEvi: Created page with "lol figured I'd make a CWC rendition of the North Korean flag, since the society he wants is pretty much North Korea. And Great Director Chandler is not very far off from Dear Le..."

lol figured I'd make a CWC rendition of the North Korean flag, since the society he wants is pretty much North Korea. And Great Director Chandler is not very far off from Dear Leader anyways.

File:Autobiographical.jpg

2010-10-27T22:01:26Z

IconOfEvi:

[[Category:Art from Sonichu 9]]

[[Naitsirhc]] serving as a Freudian slip for [[Chris|Christian's]]...tendencies.

DayOut

2010-10-26T05:42:00Z

IconOfEvi: /* Transcription */

'''DayOut''' is a series of videos showing off the rare sight of Chris Chan's fat ass outdoors. He takes us on a trip around Ruckersville and shows us such wonderful places as a McDonald's, a Wal-Mart, and a Burger King! Can you feel the excitement?

[[File:Oil_Change_due_4-5-09.jpg|thumb|right|caption|Chris' absurdly overdue oil change.]]
His [[Son-chu|trusty steed]] shows mechanical issues throughout the videos: an ungodly rattling sound is emitted from the engine at every stop light while idling. According to the oil-change sticker on the front windshield, his next scheduled oil change is for 5 [[April 2009]] — nineteen months ''before'' this video was made — or at 259,963 miles.

There are no less than three items hanging from his rear-view mirror blocking his view — a tacky, faded plastic American flag, an Indian Head air freshener and a custom-made Sonichu air freshener — and a Homer Simpson doll superglued to the car's dashboard. Chris did, however, have the common knowledge to remove the giant handicapped placard from his view.

Chris holds the camera ''while driving,'' panning it from left to right to focus on whatever building he's talking about. This distraction is in addition to all the items floating in front of him while his station wagon becomes as cluttered as his house. It's a miracle he didn't get in an accident.

==DayOut1==

{{Infobox/video
| name = Dayout1
| video = {{#ev:youtube|AMCxX5SjvFc}}
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Power|text}}
| style =
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster
| previous = [[Wigwam]]
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]
}}

====Transcription====

'''''Hello''''', today we are going on a [[Niggos|drive-by]] tour of some of my favorite [[McDonalds|places]] around... [[Ruckersville|''town'']], here and there. So we're gonna get in my car and I'm gonna... [[6 June 2010|drive around]].

==DayOut2==

{{Infobox/video
| name = Dayout2
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Yoo3v6EsPPY}}
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Power|text}}
| style =
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut1|DayOut1]]
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]
}}

====Transcription====

And, ah, coming up on, first on our trip we take a- as we go north to [[Ruckersville]].

And right over to our right, we see the new [[McDonald's]] that has been built recently, lets get a closer look at that shortly. And over to my left is the new [[Wal-Mart]] that has been constructed, that has been finished for over a month now. Got everything in there, it's practically super-size.

There is the new McDonald's, small in its stature, though it can stand to improvement, because you basically have to go around the building twice just to get to the drive-thru! They need to either add an exit lane out of here, around there, I don't know or make this whole building do a whole 180.

Other than that, the Wal-mart is just fine the way it is.

And in a moment up here, we'll take a closer look at the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]], that my father goes to sometimes.

==DayOut3==

{{Infobox/video
| name = Dayout3
| video = {{#ev:youtube|KofndtgaAjk}}
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Power|text}}
| style = {{Reason}} Reason
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut5|DayOut5]]
}}

====Transcription====

This here is the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]] that my father, goes to ever- practically every morning for breakfast and sometimes I join him as well. But not every day. Sometimes.

I am not a [[Chris and Health|fast-food addict]]. And I am [[obesity|not that big]], though I can stand to lose a few pounds.

==DayOut5==

{{Infobox/video
| name = Dayout5
| video = {{#ev:youtube|4QLOg1D38pE}}
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Power|text}}
| style = {{Reason}} Reason
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut6|DayOut6]]
}}

====Transcription====
Next up, next stop on our drive by tour, we are in the, uh, we are in the shops by Forest Lake, where we have the, uh, [[Target]] where I sometimes walk around in.
{{transcription}}

==DayOut6==

{{Infobox/video
| name = Dayout6
| video = {{#ev:youtube|MvRyWYC_8yU}}
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Power|text}}
| style =
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]
}}

====Transcription====

[small pan around, the Handicap Sticker is prominent for a bit]

Chris: An-a-and in a panoramic sort of view from a standpoint, this here is Fashion Square Shopping Center, at least the front of it. Where there are a great number of stores in there, You have a whole bunch-a buildin' stores, but the choolest ones gotta I, I would say gotta be Sears, Belk, JCPenny. Uhhh yes there is a Gamestop in there, an' a Spencers, and a Toys 'R' Us Express. Which actually gives good appeal back to the um, back to the shopping center, because they lost some of-they lost that PO when they closed the Kaybee Toy Store that used to be in there. And they will be openin' up a new book store soon to replace the one they had before.

[pans camera to his face]

On the way over here, a few other note-kit-notable locations. Where um, the Sears Club and the Wal-Mart next to the Doubletree Hotel. On the right side outgoing south, as well as Rio Hill Shopping Center with a Lowe's, a Chik-Fil-A, a Kroger's, Crutchfield, and Atlas Comic Book Store. And also, an IHOP, which my parents sometimes go to for dinner. Or lunch. I dunno. Its just one of those times. And also, there's uh, also up the road just a little bit, there's a Toys-R-Us. Up the road...northwise. And there are other places, of which uh, we'll be taken note of. Ah, also up the road some more, is a K-Mart and a Big Lots...a Burger King around there. And of course there are shops at the Barracks Road Shopping Center, which, I probably admit, there's another...Gamestop over there as well. But there's also a Barnes & Noble, as well as a...Fed-Ex/Kinkos, and a Harris Teeter and another Kroger's go over there (unintelligible). Bunch'a good stores over there. Shenanigans, and...that other store that's to it. Forget its name...I'll be waylaying(?) other locations short in just'a little bit. Stay tuned.

{{Transcription}}

==DayOut8==

{{Infobox/video
| name = Dayout8
| video = {{#ev:youtube|zkSTURU3QLw}}
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Power|text}}
| style =
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]
| next = [[DayOut#At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange|At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange]]
}}

====Transcription====

Anyway, uh, on our next drop by we're just gonna get a few little glimpses of the Downtown Mall. Y'all have seen it before as I have ah, recorded it mainly, to that, considerably [[Sonichu's Edge|Parkour]] thing. You know I guess you couldn't really care for the Parkour I, I mean, I tried, you know, I did try on that.

Now I'm stopped at a traffic light here.

C'mon. Come on.

Anyway jus- just a few peeks down the few alleys of the uh, downtown mall area. Just a few peeks here and there.

Ugh. Looks like we got the, ah, Albemarle Charlottesville Spirit Walk coming up.

If you want to do this step by step that's your luxury and you're welcome to do that. I'm just going to put myself in here at the parking garage. So I'll check in at the next destination.

==At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange==

{{Infobox/video
| name = At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange
| video = {{#ev:youtube|x8HEUj-l-mw}}
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Power|text}}
| style =
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]
| next = [[WeighIn]]
}}

====Transcription====
Pretty much on this final segment of this, uh, tour around Charlottesvile, and, uh, some of my fun favorite choice places, we can drive down the t- down the corner, and the UVA, the University of Virginia, coming up on the corner.
Don't forget traffic slopes, because, you know, red lights, they do come up.{{transcription}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Wigwam]]|nextlink=[[WeighIn]]}}
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]

Talk:WeighIn

2010-10-26T04:11:22Z

IconOfEvi:

Chris weighing himself???
Is he gonna start a weight loss plan for Jackie?

:Sign your posts and take the topic to Speculation for a discussion (admins are cracking down on forum-like posts). --[[User:Caboose -1|Caboose -1]] 16:18, 25 October 2010 (PDT)

Not enough data to work with unfortunately. We have no idea how accurate that scale is. The second he steps off of it, it could read -40 pounds. Secondly a person could put all their weight on the balls of their feet with that type of scale and screw with the measurement (you should have your weight on your heels). Sucks. This could have been good material to work with. [[User:Mupkids|Mupkids]] 19:08, 25 October 2010 (PDT)
* I've speculated on the Chris and Health talk page that its because his muscles have nearly completely atrophied. Therefore, he wouldn't weight so much. --[[User:IconOfEvi|IconOfEvi]] 20:39, 25 October 2010 (PDT)
* I'd argue for one of these explanations as well. I'll be the first to admit that I am a dumpy guy who isn't in very good shape, but there's no way in hell I weigh 12-15 lbs. more than CWC by legitimate means. Granted I am about 3/4 of an inch shorter than him by most estimates, but still. So either I am heavier by virtue of actually still having muscle mass left in my body, or I basically need to go jump off a cliff now because that's just embarrassing :( --[[User:Bluedeanie|Bluedeanie]] 20:48, 25 October 2010 (PDT)
**I'm nearly 300, but I have muscle too. Still, it could be less. I blame school and not being able to goto Tae. Point being though that muscle accounts for a lot of weight. The fact that Chris weighs 220 or whatever is more indicative to me that he has nearly zero muscle mass/power. --[[User:IconOfEvi|IconOfEvi]] 21:11, 25 October 2010 (PDT)

Chris and money

2010-10-26T03:51:46Z

IconOfEvi: /* In other works */

{{quote|He's not good at math when it comes to managing money.|[[Bob Chandler]]<ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript]]</ref>}}

It's obvious that [[Chris]] himself has no grasp on the real value of '''money''', since he actively wastes as much of his [[monthly tugboat]] as possible on luxuries like [[Eye of Judgement|trading cards]], [[Officer Nasty|sex toys]], [[Duck|porn]], [[PS3|video games]], and, more recently, [[alcohol]]. He also once, when giving out the laws of [[CWCville]], equated 10 years in prison to a $1,500 fine.<ref>[[Chris Chan Q&A 27 October 2008]]</ref> He also equated 50 hours of community service to $500 (for any sexual violations).<ref>[[Mailbag_31#Magi-Chan_knows_when_you_fuck]]</ref>

Chris is a self-admitted impulse buyer. His [[PSN]] account shows that he's never played more than half of the games he's bought. And yet, astoundingly, he's still gone out of his way to buy ''all'' available downloadable content for ''every'' PS3 game that he's ever purchased, and he also further promoted his Sony fanboyism by later buying a Sony LCD HDTV for his bedroom which likely cost at least about $1,000-$1,500. All the while, Chris buys his [[Chris and fashion|clothes]] at second-hand discount thrift stores.

==But wait, Chris isn't employed! ==

Chris's only source of income is the $809 [[monthly tugboat|"tugboat"]] that he receives from the U.S. federal government every month, placing his annual income at $9,708 a year. Chris's parents take $450 to pay for room and board.<ref>Miyamoto Saga</ref> This payment was later increased to $565 after Bob paid off Chris's enormous credit card debt.<ref>[[Vivian Gee E-mails, 2009#8 December]]</ref> In addition, Chris and his family get [[Wikipedia:Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program|SNAP]] money every month - more commonly known as "food stamps."

{{quote|My father helped me get my Social Security set up; I get more a month than I could at a job. |Chris, [[Chris_and_His_Ego|completely deluded and taking pride in being a lazy bastard]].}}

[[Bob Chandler|Chris's father]] has been encouraging his son to remain unemployed, since he believes that Chris will earn more money from his monthly tugboat than from getting a job. However, this assumption is inaccurate. Minimum wage in the state of [[Virginia]] is $7.25 an hour. If Chris were to somehow do a complete 180° on his life and begin working a full forty-hour week, his monthly payment before taxes and payment for room and board would be about $1,260 - $15,100 annually. Subtracting what he pays his parents to live in filth monthly, as well as the 5% tax his income range mandates in the state of Virginia, Chris could very likely be left with a ridiculous $9,000 in ''spending'' money, as in, for more sex toys and video games. Contrast this with the $4,200 Chris pulls annually from the government after paying off his parents (roughly equal to what he's spent in total so far on his PS3); it becomes clear that Bob's encouragement comes from either delusion or knowing that his son is a [[fail]]ure.

A very likely explanation for Chris's reckless spending is that his [[Barb|coddling]] [[Bob|parents]] are at fault (to a degree at least). In addition to coddling him throughout his entire life, they have managed to make sure that Chris has never felt the repercussions for his exorbitant spending by taking over paying Chris's credit card debt, regularly giving him about "$6 a day for small things", buying him fast food on a daily basis, and continuing to let himself blow all his money on [[list of Chris's video games|frivolities]] and [[sex toys|useless stuff]], as opposed to essentials like [[Chris and health#Chris and hygiene|hygiene products]]. Whenever Chris manages to [[The GAMe PLACe|get himself into trouble]], he knows that Bob and Barb will come [[Matthew Noble call|running to his aid and defend him]] and dig him out of whatever mess he's managed to get himself into, even if it is clear that his [[target|is in the wrong]]. This enabling is the most likely explanation (in addition to his [[autism|poor impulse control]]) for why Chris spends himself into debt as much as he does.

Chris strongly believes that by receiving and spending his tugboat on useless shit he is aiding the economy and paying for the tugboat of others.<ref>[[Mailbag 34]]</ref> Again, this demonstrates his idiocy since sales tax goes to the state government and these "tugboats" are paid with federal payroll tax. Apparently, this is too complex for Chris's autistic mind. Where Chris is hiding the printing press to afford this discretionary spending is unknown.

Interestingly enough, while he has no clue how to handle money, Chris has an unhealthy [[Ego|fixation]] on his material possessions. In [[Vivitheg's AIM chat]], he stated that he did not want to sell any of his stuff, and in the [[Miyamoto Saga]], he refused to sell anything to help raise money for the trip to Redmond.

==Credit cards==
As surprising as it is that Chris has his own credit cards, it is equally unsurprising how unwisely he uses them. As of [[February 2009]], Chris had managed to rack up $2,000 worth of debt (at the time of [[Mumble 4]], $1,000 of that sum came from the PSN store, but his bill for PSN downloads increases by the day) and had even stolen his parents' credit cards to use when his own were maxed out. According to an [[Vivian_Gee_E-mails_2|e-mail Chris sent to Vivian Gee]], by [[January 2010]] his debt was around $3,500 and had apparently been higher at some point in the intervening time.

By then, Bob Chandler had had to step in, forcing Chris to put the brakes on his spending and pay down his debt according to a regular schedule. Chris, unaware of or uninterested in the fact that unpaid credit-card debt accrues vast amounts of interest, had historically made payments in the smallest installments possible.

==In the comic==

[[File:Cwccash.jpg|thumb|250px|[[CWCville]] currency.]]
In [[Sonichu (comic)|the comic]] it is clear Chris has no idea how money works. [[Sonichu]], [[Rosechu]], [[Patti-Chan]], and most likely, all of the other characters live off welfare, just like Chris IRL. He seems to have no concept of tax, or that it's the American populace who pay for his [[Kimmi|bullshit]]. Sonichu and Rosechu are living in a two-story house with an attic offered by the city and they are [[Mailbag 21#Home economics|"paid" in average]] of US$3,500 a month just to hang around. And maybe for the occasional [[Sonichu 9|city defense]] or [[A Sonichu Day|errand]].

In [[Sonichu 9|Episode 19]], it's shown that CWCVille actually issues its own currency, in the form of C-Quarters and W-Quarters. Ten C-Quarters make up a W-Quarter - don't bother asking how that makes sense in any way, considering [[honor roll|what the word "quarter" means]]. (Our best guess: C-Quarters = US$0.25, W-Quarters = US$2.50) Nor does it explain why fines are levied in U.S. dollars: perhaps to bolster the dictatorship's foreign currency reserves, a la North Korea.

This makes even less sense considering [[CWCVille]] is in the United States, and states, let alone cities, while having considerable power, cannot print their own money. The Constitution expressly forbids anyone else other than the federal government from issuing currency. Granted, states used to issue their own money - when they were colonies, and during hard times like the Revolutionary War. [[Chris]] being Chris, and likely reading [[Goosebumps]] instead of paying attention in class, missed out on this information.

==In other works==
Chris shows us his complete misunderstanding of the stress his ideas would put on the American [[Wikipedia:Social Security (United States)|Social Security]] system if he was left in charge of it in a text called "[[A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas Story]]." This is where the idea of "Soup Hotels" came from.

{{quote|Even the homeless have a place to stay in the ten Soup Kitchens/Hotels. |Chris with a very bad idea [http://leoweekly.com/news/left-wayside that has come to frution in one American city...]}}

Chris depicts "Soup Hotels" as a building ten stories tall with between ten and twenty rooms per floor, equipped with single bathrooms, bed, lighting and cable TV.<ref>[[Mailbag 20]]</ref> Of course, the homeless will stay there for free. So, instead of building homeless shelters with dormitories, common rooms, and shared TV sets, Chris thinks the homeless should be treated to all the comforts of a ''bona fide'' hotel. This means that, in [[CWCville]], there are around 1,500 homeless people left outside. This might be the result of the local industry, choked by heavy taxes needed to pay those social expenses, being unable to make a profit there and thus moving away.

In [[Sonichu 10|''Sonichu'' #10]], [[Ultra Sonichu]] and a bevy of Rosechus stop at a soup hotel. The building is labeled Soup Hotel 17, implying that CWCville has had to open at least seven new homeless shelters in the span of a month, or they're just bad at numbering the things. Or more tellingly, that the economy of CWCville is crashing to the ground, fast.

In [[Mailbag 29]] he states that $10 an hour is a reasonable price to pay for sex with a prostitute. To show his further ignorance of simple economics, Chris proposed a chain of state-run brothels where this shockingly inexpensive fee would not only pay women for sex, pay the salary of a pimp (which would be a redundant middleman in a state-approved brothel), pay for STD testing for the prostitutes, but would also pay for free Sex Ed classes for [[virgin]]s. In real life, Chris tried to scam his way out of paying for sex with a Craigslist [[Chris and sex#Prostitution|prostitute]] who was charging $100 per hour by telling her about the trolls, his life story, and his many personal problems. The prostitute hung up on him.

== On TV ==
In [[Mumble 6]], Chris discussed making a TV show called ''The Chris Chandler Show''. One of his demands was the show should not have any commercial breaks, either showing a distinct lack of understanding as to how a TV station makes money, or perhaps he plans to sell the advertising fees to a single company so that they can play a long ad in the beginning of the air time and leave the rest of the show uninterrupted, à-la the season premieres of [[wikipedia:24 (TV Series)|24]]. We cannot know for sure, but he has probably seen at least one show that has done this, and gathered the idea from there.

Chris also seems to not understand that [[THAT IS MY HOUSE|if the health department, of Greene County, sees that TV show, that he put on the damn TV, they could be evicted, and he would have to move out]].

== Best Buy Mastercard ==

In the [[Matthew Noble call]], it was revealed by Bob himself that Chris not only has a Mastercard charge account acquired through Best Buy, but as of the second week of [[August 2010]], Chris had somehow used it to land himself in yet more debt and had been laden with fees for bouncing a card payment. Bob, in the throes of some sort of conspiracy paranoia involving the staff and patrons of [[the GAMe PLACe]], claims that it was most likely [[Michael Snyder]] who had hacked Chris's credit card and checking accounts, though why someone who's been on a manager's salary for several years would bother stealing from Chris is unknown. Also unknown is why ''any'' financial institution would give Chris a line of credit at this point.

Bob continues that the resulting transactions may have ruined Chris' credit rating (though that ship has ''long'' since fucking sailed), and, in a disturbingly Chris-like fashion, seems to use this damning information to try to make Chris' latest brush with the [[Law]] seem "petty" in comparison.

There are three possibilities as to what has actually occurred (from least to most likely):
* Trolls have achieved this new pinnacle of fucking with Chris and didn't bother bragging about it on some forum or another.
* Some regular criminal's credit card fraud scheme has, just by chance, hit Chris.
* Chris blew whatever little credit that Best Buy had foolishly given him, mistakenly attempted to pay off the card with funds from his checking account that weren't there, and is now blaming his crippling debt on [[Trolls]], in another transparent attempt to not have to take responsibility.

==See also==
*[[Monthly tugboat]]

==Sauce==
<references/>

{{Chris and}}

[[Category: Chris-chan]]

Talk:WeighIn

2010-10-26T03:39:17Z

IconOfEvi:

Talk:WeighIn

2010-10-26T03:39:03Z

IconOfEvi:

DayOut

2010-10-26T03:10:33Z

IconOfEvi: /* DayOut6 */

'''DayOut''' is a series of videos showing off the rare sight of Chris Chan's fat ass outdoors. He takes us on a trip around Ruckersville and shows us such wonderful places as a McDonald's, a Wal-Mart, and a Burger King! Can you feel the excitement?

Chris holds the camera while driving, panning it from left to right to focus on whatever building he's talking about. It's a miracle he didn't get in an accident.

==DayOut1==

{{Infobox/video
| name = Dayout1
| video = {{#ev:youtube|AMCxX5SjvFc}}
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Power|text}}
| style =
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster
| previous = [[Wigwam]]
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]
}}

====Transcription====

'''''Hello''''', today we are going on a [[Niggos|drive-by]] tour of some of my favorite [[McDonalds|places]] around... [[Ruckersville|''town'']], here and there. So we're gonna get in my car and I'm gonna... [[6 June 2010|drive around]].

==DayOut2==

{{Infobox/video
| name = Dayout2
| video = {{#ev:youtube|Yoo3v6EsPPY}}
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Power|text}}
| style =
| shirt = Unclear
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut1|DayOut1]]
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]
}}

====Transcription====

And, ah, coming up on, first on our trip we take a- as we go north to [[Ruckersville]].

And right over to our right, we see the new [[McDonald's]] that has been built recently, lets get a closer look at that shortly. And over to my left is the new [[Wal-Mart]] that has been constructed, that has been finished for over a month now. Got everything in there, it's practically super-size.

There is the new McDonald's, small in its stature, though it can stand to improvement, because you basically have to go around the building twice just to get to the drive-thru! They need to either add an exit lane out of here, around there, I don't know or make this whole building do a whole 180.

Other than that, the Wal-mart is just fine the way it is.

And in a moment up here, we'll take a closer look at the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]], that my father goes to sometimes.

==DayOut3==

{{Infobox/video
| name = Dayout3
| video = {{#ev:youtube|KofndtgaAjk}}
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Power|text}}
| style =
| shirt = Unclear
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut2|DayOut2]]
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut6|DayOut6]]
}}

====Transcription====

This here is the [[Coffee Place|Burger King]] that my father, goes to ever- practically every morning for breakfast and sometimes I join him as well. But not every day. Sometimes.

I am not a [[Chris and Health|fast-food addict]]. And I am not that big, though I can stand to lose a few pounds.

==DayOut6==

{{Infobox/video
| name = Dayout6
| video = {{#ev:youtube|MvRyWYC_8yU}}
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Power|text}}
| style =
| shirt = Unclear
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]
| next = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]
}}

====Transcription====

Chris: An-a-and in a panoramic sort of view from a standpoint, this here is Fashion Square Shopping Center, at least the front of it. Where there a great number of stores in there, You have a whole bunch-a buildin' stores, but the choolest ones gotta I, I would say gotta be Sears, Built[(?), JCPenny. Uhhh yes there is a Gamestop in there, an' a Spencers, and a Toys 'R' Us Express. Which actually gives good appeal back to the um, back to the shopping center, because they lost some of-they lost that PO when they closed the Kaybee Toy Store that used to be in there. And they will be openin' up a new book store soon to replace the one they had before.

[pans camera to his face]

On the way over here, a few other note-kit-notable locations. Where um, the Sears Club and the Wal-Mart next to the Gullatree(?) Hotel. On the right side outgoing south, as well as Rawhill(?) Shopping Center with a Lull's(?), a Chik-Fil-A, a Truger's(?), Truckspiel(?), and App(unintelligible) Comic/ Book Store. And also, an IHOP, which my parents sometimes go to for dinner. Or lunch. I dunno. Its just one of those times. And also, there's uh, also up the road just a little bit, there's a Toys-R-Us. Up the road (unintelligible). And there are other places, of which uh, we'll be taken out of(?). Ah, also up the road some more, is a K-Mart and a Big Lots...a Burger King around there. (unintelligible) the Faxroad(?) Shopping Center, which, I probably admit, there's another...Gamestop over there as well. But there's also a Barnes & Noble, as well as a...Fed-Ex/Kinkos, and (unintelligible) go over there (unintelligible). Bunch'a good stores over there. Shenanigans, and...that other store that's to it. Forget its name...I'll be waylaying(?) other locations short in just'a little bit. Stay tuned.

{{Transcription}}

==DayOut8==

{{Infobox/video
| name = Dayout8
| video = {{#ev:youtube|zkSTURU3QLw}}
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Power|text}}
| style =
| shirt = Unclear
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut3|DayOut3]]
| next = [[DayOut#At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange|At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange]]
}}

====Transcription====

Anyway, uh, on our next drop by we're just gonna get a few little glimpses of the Downtown Mall. Y'all have seen it before as I have ah, recorded it mainly, to that, considerably [[Sonichu's Edge|Parkour]] thing. You know I guess you couldn't really care for the Parkour I, I mean, I tried, you know, I did try on that.

Now I'm stopped at a traffic light here.

C'mon. Come on.

Anyway jus- just a few peeks down the few alleys of the uh, downtown mall area. Just a few peeks here and there.

Ugh. Looks like we got the, ah, Albemarle Charlottesville Spirit Walk coming up.

If you want to do this step by step that's your luxury and you're welcome to do that. I'm just going to put myself in here at the parking garage. So I'll check in at the next destination.

==At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange==

{{Infobox/video
| name = At Least My Face Is Not F3c7ing Orange
| video = {{#ev:youtube|x8HEUj-l-mw}}
| stardate = 25 [[October 2010]]
| subject = {{Power|text}}
| style =
| shirt = [[Image:Greenwidestripeshirt.png]] The Swamp Monster
| previous = [[DayOut#DayOut8|DayOut8]]
| next = [[WeighIn]]
}}

====Transcription====

{{transcription}}

{{succession|label=[[List of videos|Chris's videos]]|prevlink=[[Wigwam]]|nextlink=[[WeighIn]]}}
[[Category:Videos Christian uploaded to YouTube]]