https://sonichu.com/w/api.php?action=feedcontributions&feedformat=atom&user=IrisvielCWCki - User contributions [en]2026-04-26T11:18:09ZUser contributionsMediaWiki 1.37.6https://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Kacey_Call_6&diff=165697Kacey Call 62013-05-10T01:35:41Z<p>Irisviel: Broken Mediafire link removed</p>
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<div>31 [[August 2009]]<br />
<br />
*[[Chris]] got some calls from a [[troll]] pretending to be from [[GameFAQs|gamefaqs.com]] (Chris pronounces "GameFAQs" as if "faqs" is a word).<br />
*Chris thinks he defeated a troll by calling him back and telling him to shut the fuck up.<br />
*Chris's parents drop him off at the [[mall]] so he can draw [[comics]] while they go use their senior discount at Ihop.<br />
*If Chris went to Ihop with his parents it would "mess things up" because they're using their senior discount to buy Chris sandwiches.<br />
*Chris wrote a list of nice discussion topics because he doesn't want [[Kacey]] to yell at him again.<br />
*First topic: ''Hannah Montanna''. Kacey says it's for 12 year old girls, [[Pedofork|Chris thinks it's pretty good and wants to buy it on Blu-Ray]].<br />
*Second topic: Chris's [[college]] days. His first good memory is the time a hypnotist came and included Chris in his act.<br />
*First the hypnotist wanted Chris to insult him, so Chris called him [[Random-access humor|"Uncle Screwy Louie"]]. He still thinks it's funny. Then the hypnotist said "when you open your eyes you'll see everyone naked". Chris didn't really see anyone naked, but he played along as he [[The Creepy Stare|smiled at the ladies]].<br />
*Another good college memory is when he was included in a quiz show game. Chris didn't make it very far, but at least he tried.<br />
*Chris was in touch with his "girl crush" [[Kellie Andes]] for a while after graduation; recently he found out she's married with two children. Chris could tell by looking at a prom picture of her that she was already taken by [[JERK|some guy]], when he saw that it put him into [[Stress|shock]] for a while.<br />
*Chris made a few friends and acquaintances at [[PVCC]], "but they kinda came and gone", especially after he got kicked out of English class. He "became shy" after that.<br />
*Chris talks about a teacher, or as Chris calls him "[[CADD Chef|this one black guy]]" at PVCC, and how upon first being there he "had bad vibes about him". He picked almost as many arguments as his father! Chris says the teacher would constantly [[Kick the Autistic|put him down and what-not]], with mean insults like "That's not right, do it over bla bla bla"... Kacey points out that's not putting him down, that's teaching. Chris did not like his tone of voice. "The way he carried on and such. He talked more calmly to the other students, I actually observed."<br />
*Chris was happy to graduate from PVCC, because "It felt more like a Hellhole than Heaven". Chris was sad to graduate from [[High School]], because he didn't receive any awards.<br />
*He's still whining about not getting any awards; he got a star pin but "that's SMALL in comparison to other awards". Kacey tells him to stop being childish and grow the fuck up; Chris ignores her and whines more.<br />
*Chris watched ''Labyrinth'' because it's Kacey's favorite movie. Kacey talks about David Bowie's [[Pickle|"bulge"]]; Chris gets uncomfortable and tries to change the subject because he is [[Homos|STRAIGHT]].<br />
*Chris "tried reading" ''[[Harry Potter]]'' but couldn't get into it. Also competition with [[Pokemon]] or whatever.<br />
*Chris suddenly tard rages because a troll keeps calling him. He doesn't understand why he keeps calling after Chris told him to stop.<br />
*Kacey asks what books Chris has read recently. He of course says Pamela Anderson's ''Star'', then admits he hasn't read anything else. Kacey tells him he should read ''Catch 22''. Chris thinks a "Catch 22" is a kind of "sexual touch".<br />
*The only books Chris owns are [[R.L. Stine|''Goosebumps'' and ''Fear Street'']].<br />
*He also read ''The Giver'', so he spends five minutes recounting what happens in that book.<br />
*Chris tries claiming that he has multiple personalities. Kacey tells him he's full of shit.<br />
*'''Chris says he JUST NOW changed over to his other personality, so now he's [[Christopher]] instead of Christian. He is serious.'''<br />
*"Christopher" says he only caught some of the conversation and doesn't know what's going on.<br />
*Kacey tells him he might have a brain tumor. <br />
*Christopher gives up and says he just switched back to Christian.<br />
*Christian says "Christopher" came out recently while he was playing ''[[Guitar Hero]]''. He thinks there is a difference between his two personalities' voices.<br />
*Chris says he'll talk to his doctor about this serious problem.<br />
*Kacey isn't taking his stupidity seriously, so Chris suddenly backtracks and says he just made up this multiple personality shit to mess with the trolls.<br />
*Chris stopped taking some of his meds and now he feels more confident. <br />
*Chris has been taking Lipitor for the last 2 years to keep his cholesterol down. He's like "It was optional, but I thought it was a good idea".<br />
*Chris says he mostly eats grilled chicken sandwiches from [[McDonald's]]. He thinks this is [[Chris and Health|healthy]]. He also only eats Hungry Man dinners "once or twice" a month, mostly he eats Healthy Choice frozen dinners.<br />
*Chris says he walks about half an hour a day around the neighborhood, and thinks this is "strenuous".<br />
*Kacey thinks Chris is going to die.<br />
<br />
==Audio==<br />
<center><br />
{{Infobox/Audiofile<br />
| name = Kacey-CWC Call 6 Part 1<br />
| audio = {{#ev:youtube|EQDaJ5eBU-c}}<br />
| Stardate = 31 August 2009<br />
| Featuring = [[Chris]]; [[Kacey]]<br />
| Saga = {{Liquid}} Liquid Saga<br />
| previous = [[Kacey Call 5]]<br />
| next = [[Kacey Call 7]]<br />
}} </center><br />
<br />
<center><br />
{{Infobox/Audiofile<br />
| name = Kacey-CWC Call 6 Part 2<br />
| audio = {{#ev:youtube|9Ds4EPTV5rg}}<br />
| Stardate = 31 August 2009<br />
| Featuring = [[Chris]]; [[Kacey]]<br />
| Saga = {{Liquid}} Liquid Saga<br />
| previous = [[Kacey Call 5]]<br />
| next = [[Kacey Call 7]]<br />
}} </center><br />
<br />
<center><br />
{{Infobox/Audiofile<br />
| name = Kacey-CWC Call 6 Part 3<br />
| audio = {{#ev:youtube|vE0LYw4clCM}}<br />
| Stardate = 31 August 2009<br />
| Featuring = [[Chris]]; [[Kacey]]<br />
| Saga = {{Liquid}} Liquid Saga<br />
| previous = [[Kacey Call 5]]<br />
| next = [[Kacey Call 7]]<br />
}} </center><br />
<br />
<center><br />
{{Infobox/Audiofile<br />
| name = Kacey-CWC Call 6 Part 4<br />
| audio = {{#ev:youtube|qQx5MJBqTGw}}<br />
| Stardate = 31 August 2009<br />
| Featuring = [[Chris]]; [[Kacey]]<br />
| Saga = {{Liquid}} Liquid Saga<br />
| previous = [[Kacey Call 5]]<br />
| next = [[Kacey Call 7]]<br />
}} </center><br />
<br />
<center><br />
{{Infobox/Audiofile<br />
| name = Kacey-CWC Call 6 Part 5 (Final)<br />
| audio = {{#ev:youtube|xVHgCYiszZw}}<br />
| Stardate = 31 August 2009<br />
| Featuring = [[Chris]]; [[Kacey]]<br />
| Saga = {{Liquid}} Liquid Saga<br />
| previous = [[Kacey Call 5]]<br />
| next = [[Kacey Call 7]]<br />
}} </center><br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Hello?<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Hey Chris, it's Kacey.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Hi Kace, how are you?<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I'm okay, just a little tired from work, how are you?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh, I'm okay, I'm a little too tired from uh, being trolled. <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Aw.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I keep answering incoming calls from the trolls. Uh, especially, uh, to- Especially, uh, you know, incoming calls from the one... troll who pretended to be an employee over at GAME FACKS ''[sic]'' dot com- You know, G-A-M-E F-A-Qs, uh... Anyway, uh... They say- Anyway, they say it was the guy that's been ordering all the uh, free catalogues and boxes and what-not, sending 'em to my house with the stupid [[Ian Brandon Anderson]] name on the address. Uh, yeah but I'm handling that and dealing with-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well you should tell them to fuck off and leave you alone. I mean...<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I'm sorry, what?<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' You should tell 'em to fuck off and leave you alone. They won't be expecting that.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, my father- My father did tell them that. Actually, after we got home from the uh, church yesterday, he told 'em that. And they called a couple more times today and he's finally giving up. <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yeah but you shouldn't be bothering your father with that, I mean YOU should be able to do it. <br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah well I mean-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' You should be able to fight your own battles.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah I mean- I mean, he's been calling the house phone and my father- And my mom and dad have been ans- Have been monitoring his calls with their caller I.D. which is downstairs. In their lair only.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well then they shouldn't pick up either.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Hm. Yeah well mostly they do not pick up. Uh, anyway, also this, uh, guy... that pretends to be a legal rep from- from uh, Bandai, Bandai or something... Yeah he's practically calling non-stop, and that's just been- That's just been bothering to me. I finally- I finally managed to to, uh- I think I finally shut him up though. Uh, yeah-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I think you should just keep telling them to fuck off, I think you need to take a better offensive stance on this. They're not going to expect that from you, you just need to be like... Like, just be strong.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, you think I haven't tried telling 'em to uh, to back- to back the fuck off, I have done that before.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yeah but you really have to be a man about it, you need to really say it in a tone, you can't show them any fear, any whining or anything, you need to just WOW them.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah. Yeah well anyway, I think I finally got- I finally got the Bandai guy to shut up, I, uh, you know, I called him back and I told him to call toll-free HIS phone number, OR shut the fuck up and stop calling my cell phone number. And then I said goodbye and hung up on him. <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well, that's a good start.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah. ''[Forced laugh]'' Yeah, so anyway, um...<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well if you've got their numbers you should call back and do that yourself, I mean, don't wait for them to come on your turf, you need to show them you mean business.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah...<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I mean, they have your number anyways, it's not like it would hurt.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, I should definitely be calling 'em back and telling 'em to, uh... Yeah. I will do that. Uh, but anyway-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yeah, shouldn't let them take control of you. You need to control THEM.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Turn the tables, you know.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah. I will do that. I will do that, but any- Yeah. Anyway, something else on my mind, my father and I were planning on going down to Social Security tomorrow or Wednesday, talking about what they can do for us with the, uh, job and all that.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well that's good, I mean it is on the website though, so it shouldn't harm you, but maybe they'll have someone who can help you through, but remember, don't let them do everything for you, and you should probably do it tomorrow, you know... Just because, I mean why not get it done as soon as possible?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah. Well-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Get it done faster.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' That will surely show those trolls.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah. You know one thing though, uh... I would do it myself but unfortunately I don't know the right questions to ask, my father is the one that has- has more knowledge about that sorta thing, so yeah. But definitely like, uh-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' But you need to get the knowledge. So, YOU should be doing this, your dad can't do this for you, this is about you being independent. <br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah I know, but I don't know the right questions to ask.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well, they're gonna show you what you have to do, I mean the... It's common sense what questions you're gonna have to ask. Like, "How much can I make? How many hours can I do?" this is stuff you already know, you shouldn't sell yourself short.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Or ask your dad beforehand. Don't make him do it for you, just be like- See you don't even have to ask him, just be like "Do you have any suggestions?"<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah I-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' This is something that you need to do yourself.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah I need to ask suggestions, yeah. I should probably ask him to write down the right list of questions for me. But then he'll probably- Then he'll likely insist on wanting to come and, uh- Yeah, come along anyway. And plus like, you know, yeah, my mom's just finally offered me to, uh, to uh, to drive her car today, but unfortunately I had to let her drive, yeah, she was going to IHOP, and I wanted to do some- get some drawing done at the mall while we were out, uh, cuz you know, if I'm not going to [indecipherable] family, but they would drop me off at the mall while they're at IHOP, cuz if I go with them to IHOP that will mess up their uh, senior discount deal. And then they might not be able to get me the sandwiches that I would have- The sandwich I would have that night. It's a pretty good sandwich, by the way.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' You got a sandwich from IHOP? That's like, the International House of Pancakes.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah well, my family gets like a senior discount, and uh...<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' But what does that have to do with pancakes, it's pancake house!<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[Laughs]'' Well, they sell sandwiches there. Heh, I mean-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' But, you go to IHOP for pancakes...<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Heh, well I'm sure my mom and dad would have eaten pancakes themselves there, but I mean I don't know, but you know, it's their- Order pancakes at the uh, International- Over at the IHOP... ''(Uncomfortable laugh)'' I don't know... Plus, I don't know all the details of the uh, senior citizens discount, though anyway if I went with them there, uh, it would just mess things up. I mean I know we- We know, we tried it once before, and they- Yeah, it just really messed it up.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Messed what up?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' The senior discount deal.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I mean the people at the, uh, restaurant place are, uh, fairly strict.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yeah I'm surprised they even have a senior discount deal, I mean my restaurant doesn't.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, but it's like once a week though. Only on Monday nights.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Okay, well back to the Social thing, I mean... I think you need to tell your parents that this is something you need to do, you need to face the world on your own. It'll be a great learning experience for you and you'll be with people who are there to help you. So it's not gonna hurt you or anything.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Alright, we'll I'll- I'll talk to my father and see- See if he'll write me the correct list of questions and let me go by myself.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I mean plus they're gonna take you a LOT more seriously if you're coming to them yourself. They're gonna look at you with your parents and they're gonna be like, "This guy doesn't want help". They're gonna... not help you. They're going to do it resentfully.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Hm. Yeah. <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I mean that's just the way the world works, unfortunately, that's the way they're gonna see it.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah it's like a dog eat dog world, well you're right, I see- I see- I see it from your point of view, I get it. Hm. Anyway, I- Anyway, let me, uh- Anyway, uh... Anyway, other than that, I did come up with some nice, uh, discussion topics that you and I could talk about. You know, like a couple of days ago, but then uh... Then you brought up the maturity, telling me all that... It's like I couldn't get the, uh, conversation topics I managed to write-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Okay well if you have them, go ahead and bring them out, that'd be cool.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Alright. Alright, well... Here's a good one, uh, let's talk about my feelings on Hanna Montanna, your feelings- Your, uh... We could- we could further your- Your- Destination of your feelings about her. And that show.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh, um, well, Hanna Montanna's like a guilty pleasure for me, because you know, it's a show for like 13 year-old little teeny-boppers, and I really shouldn't be watching it. <br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Heh.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' But, I mean, it's cool, Miley Cyrus is so talented.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Well I mean I-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' But it's really for teeny-bopper girls.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah well I mean, I've only seen like a couple of episodes of the show, yeah, but from what I recall, you know, yeah, she's- she's pretty good. But it's like you know, I mean I could get into like, you know, watching more of the show myself, I just uh, hadn't really gotten around to it, or... Just hadn't really felt like it but it's like you know, I could. I mean you know they released season one on DVD, plus they have the uh, movie on Blu-Ray, I could rent that, or... rent the season one or whatever.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Right.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh... but anyway yeah-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Remember how I said I wanted to talk about more ADULT topics, and I just mean mature topics? Do you have any of those?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh... Well, kind of, we could talk about college- We could talk about my college days. <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Okay, go ahead.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' You know, just uh- I mean I could reminisce a bit about uh... You know, between high school days and eventually leading on to college days. Got the rundown here (?)... Let's see...<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Okay well tell me about college.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Um... Yeah, okay, I only have like a couple of good memories from my college days, like uh, you know... Uh, there was this one time, where uh... This good- Where this hypnotist came in, and uh, he- And then I- And then he let me uh, get up on stage and be one of the uh, subjects. But it's like, I wasn't really hyp- I wasn't really hypnotized. But I, like, played along with it, I mean I actually knew what was going on.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Okay...<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' And I think uh... Hang on, let me see if I can remember what happened. Um... Yeah I think at one point, uh... He wanted me to, like, insult him a little bit, when he said a cue. And it's like, uh... Yeah, it's like yeah, okay, I got it, when you say the word you'll want me to insult you, and it was like I couldn't- I tried to think of a good insult but I don't know, I just came up with like you know, just calling him "Uncle Screwey Louie". ''(Waits for Kacey to laugh)''<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Ohh. <br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''(Laughs)'' I don't know why that- That little- He just.. Just a silly stupid name. Uncle Screwy Louie. Heh.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yeah. ''(Laughs politely)''<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah then like you know, later he's like you know, oh, then everyb- Then he says, like you know, he says at a certain point everybody opens their eyes and then... It's like- We're supposedly like to see everybody... naked- Everybody in the audience naked, and freak out or something. It's like, uh, you know, I- I opened my eyes and I didn't really see anybody naked, I saw everybody with their clothes on. But it's like you know, I played along and I just sat there and smiled. Heh. At the ladies in the audience. ''(Laughs)'' Yeah. And then he says like you know he gave me another cue like yeah, "Chicago", then everybody- Then we all- Then we all danced. A little bit. <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Uh-huh.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' And it's like I did my fill of dancing, he touched my shoulder and told me to sit down, there you go. Uh, I think that was pretty much- I think that was pretty much it as far as I can remember from that day.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' That's cool.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh, anyway, uh, anyway another- Anyway another good memory I have from the college days is like you know I participated in a quiz sh- In uh, this one time, in a quiz show event. Uh... It was like you know, one of those remote con- One of those things where they hand you a remote control and you answer the- and you answer the uh, questions while you're in a seat. And if you're amongst the uh, top four scorers you get to go to a- You get to go and uh, be one of the uh, buzzers on the panel to uh, win the mon- win the prize money. Try and win the prize money. Uh, obviously I did not even get up there- I did not even get the chance to get up there, but, you know, I tried anyway.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well, at least you tried, that's all you can ask for.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah. Oh, another thing I uh, feel like I should mention, uh, remember- I think I remember telling you a little bit about my high school crush Kellie An- Kellie Andies?<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Uh-huh...<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, uh, after we graduated I was in touch with her for like about a year and a half after that, and then it's like I- I missed calling her one weekend, and then it's like I sorta- I lost the habit. And then like a- And then like a couple of months- A couple of months, uh... earlier recent- Couple of months ago recently, I found that she had been... Excuse me. She had been married and she has like, one or two children. So...<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' That's good for her then, anyway. But it's like you know, uh, I, you know, after I stopped the uh, habit my mom made me- My mom told me like you know- Oh yeah I can tell from like, you know, just from looking at her like, like in... The prom... The, uh... Yeah she was obviously already taken by this- By some guy. And it's like- I was like oh my God, I was in shock for a while. I think it was like for a couple of weeks or a couple of months. Maybe- Yeah, somewhere between there.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''(Not really listening)'' Oh that's cool.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, but anyway, I lost touch with her and that was like a downfall. Uh, I've made a few friends and acquaintances since uh, Piedmont. But they kinda like came and gone. And it's like you know, mostly like GONE, because since, you know, after- Especially gone since after February 24th 2003, which was- that was the, uh... 21st birthday I got kicked outta the English classroom, so it's like you know, I couldn't make- I just didn't- I uh, just didn't feel like- I just didn't... I just became shy, and didn't make as many friends as I was able to beforehand. And then the uh, and then the uh, Sweetheart Search and Mary Lee Walsh, uh... Going on and all that. And then I got banned for a year and the anger management and the... I got the anger management from the uh, psychiatrist's class, I think I told you about that. Uh, but anyway, I, um... It also- Also, I told [[Kim]] about this part, but uh... You know, during my, like my last seme- My- My last, uh, couple of semesters... Before I got my diploma, um... Instead of my teacher being this, uh- Being this nice, uh... Woman teacher I knew, uh... It was this one black guy. Just one black ''[indecipherable, probably something racist]''... But he was just like uh, you know, upon first meeting him, I- [[Chris and race|I had bad vibes about him]]. And... And yeah, I was right- I was right with that cuz you know, he- He and I just never saw eye to eye. And he picked more arguments, almost as much as my father.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Uh, okay, so you thought this guy was like your father?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh... No, no, no, I did not consider him like my father, I'm just saying that like you know, he picked about as many arguments, and pushed a nu- pushed a number of buttons, about as much as my father did. And it was- it just- it just really made me angry at him-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well, what sort of arguments were they about? What were they like? I mean, a teacher shouldn't do that.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, like you know, he was contradicting my work, and this was also in the uh, last-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Are you sure he wasn't giving you constructive criticism? He is a teacher...<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Well- Yeah, it wasn't really constructive criticsm, it was just mostly put-downs and what-not.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Okay, well what did he say?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' He's just like, uh, "No, this is not right, do it over, bla bla bla bla bla..."<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' That's not putting you down, that's teaching!<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh, but still, he was- His tone of voice was really- It was like- It was full of anger! And- And I just did not- I just did not like that I-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well how many times did he have to tell you that, I mean I'd be angry too if someone kept making the same mistake...<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah but, you know, I'm not- '''I'm not one to repeat mistakes''', and I was like doing this... really big project in my final semester. The big plans to make- The big Computer Aided Drafting and Design plans for my Cwcville Shopping Center, two stories, all the stores and the mayor's office! <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well, I think he was just trying to help you. I mean, he's teaching, he wants you to pass. He doesn't want you to fail.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah well I- I mean, I did finish it. Ended up getting a passing grade, but still, you know, I did not like his tone of voice! The way he carried on as such.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well did you tell him that? Did you tell him that you appreciated his criticisms, but maybe he should, uh... watch his tone?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh, yeah, I don't remember exactly but I think I might have thanked him for his- uh, for uh, you know, being a teacher and that- and that sort of thing. Uh... Yeah I don't think I talked- I don't think I talked to him about his tone of voice.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well, maybe that's just the way he talks, I mean did he talk that way to the other students?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh, no he was- He talked more calmly. He talked more calmly to the other students, I actually observed.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well what'd you get in the class?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I ended up getting like a... You know, a passing a grade like an A- Like an A or a B.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well, an A and a B is a really big difference. And, you know, passing- The only thing that isn't passing is one failing grade, so you know... That's, well...<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Hm.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' At least you passed the course.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah I passed the course, got my degree, but anyway, when I got my diploma then at the graduation ceremony, I mean like, I was only too glad to leave that Piedmont Virgina College, cuz you know, I had no new friends- I had no new friends that I would be leaving behind. And I had the bee-yotching Mary Lee Walsh. And then the-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I thought that it wasn't her- I thought you apologized about that, and stuff.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, uh- This- Yeah, I mean- This was like, only a couple of months ago... And, I like- Up to two months ago...<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well, then you should probably stop referring to her as that. You know, let it go. Let the past go.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''(Annoyed grunt)'' Anyway the point was, I was only too glad get- to graduate from Piedmont, 'cause anyway, I just per- Just personally, it felt more like a Hellhole than Heaven. Felt more like Hell.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' But... It's school, what do you expect?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Hmm. Anyway but, I think a big difference though is like, you know, Manchester High School, I definitely have more... positive memories from there, like you know and I did have all my friends. And it's like you know, when I did graduate, I was just sad to leave all my friends. And the all- And all- And all- And all that. Plus, like you know, I didn't, uh, get an award for my creativity, even though I was very creative and I was like... I was highly commended- I was highly commended upon that, at- at- at that moment.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yeah, I think you've told me this before.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''(Ignoring/talking over her)'' But uh, I did not- I did not- I did not get an award at the end. During the award ceremony, that whole graduation mess just... Yeah. Between the award and-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well remember, like I said, high school stuff really doesn't matter. Not in the real world.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''(Groan)'' Maybe not, but it makes you feel better about yourself, talks yourself up, from- to how you feel...<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Why would you need that to feel good about yourself? You should feel good about yourself, period-dot-the end. You don't need an award, that's stupid. That's putting faith in material things, when you you should be putting faith in yourself.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah I did, I mean, I did have faith-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I mean, you got to graduate, you got the best reward of all.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, I did- I did have faith in myself. It's just like you know, I felt like, you know, they did not see me as worthy of getting an award at that time, it's just like you know... <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''(Talking over him)'' You shouldn't think of it like that, maybe just, you know, other people deserved it. You can't win everything!<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah it's like, as if they were telling me like, they had no faith in me.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' That doesn't mean anything! If you said you were commended, then you were commended, just 'cause you don't get an award, doesn't mean that you're not awesome, I mean, that's childish. That really is, you shouldn't need an award, and you shouldn't feel that they have to give it to you.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uhh...<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Maybe someone else really deserved it.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''(Annoyed stress noises)''<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I mean, you weren't the only one who didn't get an award.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Well, I know, I was not the only one who didn't get an- Well, actually, that's not really true, 'cause I got like... a star, for my grades. My [[Honor Roll]] grades. A star pin. But yeah- That's just- That's just like, you know... That's SMALL in comparison to these BIG awards, and I just felt like you know, oh, I'm looking forward to like-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I don't think it's a big award, I mean did they get money or something? If they didn't, it's not a big deal. They get a piece of paper, oh wow, it's a piece of paper that they probably don't even have anymore, it's probably lost.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I wouldn't have- I would not have lost my piece of paper if I had gotten it.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I really don't think it's as important as you say it is, and you shouldn't put that much stock in it. I mean...<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Anyway, yeah... I mean I don't put- I don't put as much into it back then, as I- Uh, I don't put as much nowadays. Into that, I just you know-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' You shouldn't hold a grudge against that, I mean you're 27. You should get over it. High school is over. It's been over.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, I mean I-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' You have one year until your ten year reunion, I mean it's DONE. Done deal.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh, I'm sorry, I didn't understand the beginning of that sentence, you said something about the reunion?<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yeah, I mean, that's just showing how much time has passed.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Hm. Yeah.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' So you should totally get over it. You don't wanna go there and, you know, talk about this, so people go, "Oh my gosh, this has been over, what are you talking about?" You wanna be adult.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah... ''(Long pause)'' But I think that if, still, if I had've gotten an award, I would've felt- I would definitely have felt more- I could've felt a lot better, and much easier, to like you know, leaving high school behind. Like cuz you know, it was definitely more about leave- Me leaving my friends behind.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well, I mean, just because you get out of high school doesn't mean you shouldn't keep in touch with your friends. Just leaving high school, it should be a good thing, because you're going on to bigger and better things.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah. ''(Long pause)'' Yeah. Hm, you know I actually wanna talk about an adult thing, let's just talk- like you know, uh... Uh, how do you deal- Uh, it's like you know, you have your- You have your well-thought moments to yourself, and then you think- And then you think you don't go off (?) if you appreciate the uh... older things, and uh like you know, like- like the uh, older music and the older movies that you watch. You know, you better- You better appreciate them as an adult, cuz you- Rather than as a child, because you couldn't really understand it, it's like you know, recently I watched some- Recently I re-watched some [???] Brothers, and- and- and I have a better adult understanding of the movie than I did when I watched it there a number of times since I uh, was a child or a teenager. Uhh, what are some of the things that you reminisced about, that made you feel better? Or... And you felt, more better when you viewed it as an adult.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I'm sorry I didn't get that, could you repeat that? <br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah... Some of the things that you used to, uh think about when you were a child, but then you kinda thought about as an adult and further appreciated as such. Uh, what were some of those things?<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''(Long pause)''<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Did you understand that? Kacey?<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Um... Uh... Not much.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Not much. Okay... Hm, okay, um... It's like- Okay, what was the, uh, favorite movie of yours that you watched when you were younger? When you were young.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Um, it's still ''Labyrinth''. I mean, ''Labyrinth'' is a pretty old movie.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh, by- Yeah oh by the way I watched- Anyway I rented it and watched it last night, it is a good movie. <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' You watched it? Oh, cool!<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah. All the complex- All the complexities, and uh... That made it like you know, yeah I think knowledge would be [???] you know. I like the part in the beginning with the uh, maze. Like, oh yeah, you think it's a wall, but then it's actually like you know, it's actually a space between the vines that's just- It's just like a visual illusion right there. <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' So what do you think about Jareth? I mean, Jareth was my favorite.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh yeah, David Bowie played him. Yeah, he's okay-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh my gosh, I know, he coulda stolen me any day.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' He coulda stolen you any day? What, like as a little baby?<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well, no, obviously not, but I mean, he was... He was- Oh, that fucking [[Pickle|bulge]]! Ooh.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Well, I mean that's- I mean, the uh- Yeah. You would- You would be impressed by that, but as a guy, I'm not totally impressed with that.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''(Trying not to laugh)'' Why not, it's David Bowie! Everybody loves David Bowie!<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah well I'm str- Yeah well it's like, you know, uh... I don't wanna go into that, it's just like you know, just... Yeah. But, yeah, I'm straight. <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' But still, it's not like you can't appreciate. <br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' But I mean it's like you know, I appreciate his- I appreciate the way he sang, and yeah, he sang pretty good. But yeah I mean, then you go reference- referencing his BULGE. And then, that's like WHOA-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I mean, just because you can say another man is attractive or hot, doesn't mean you're gay, like I can easily say another GIRL is hot or attractive, and appreciate her for her womanly things, and it doesn't mean that I want to have a relationship with her. <br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uhhh, yeah but anyway- Uh, from my point of view though... Uh, definitely... have not really given it much- given it all that much though, and... Ahh, I don't- At this point I just don't feel like I could... care to really change my mind otherwise. <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Uh, okay.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' But I liked how, uh, Jen- How uh, Jennifer played her role as the, uh, girl who went through da maze. That was pretty good. <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Uh-huh.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' And then made the- And then made the friends along the way, like uh... Yeah she had that- That yeti-like guy, I think his name was, like, Yorda or something like that? <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Uh, close enough, heh.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I'm sorry, what?<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I said close enough.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Heh, close enough, okay. Yeah I kinda liked him, and... Oh yeah, there's like... I bet- You know, he keeps- He kept calling Hoggle, "Hogwart"? That's where- I bet that's where the author of ''[[Harry Potter]]'' got that- got that word. From that movie ''Labyrinth''.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I don't know if that's where she got it, but... That's a good theory.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''(Chuckles)'' Yeah. It is a good- Yeah it is a good theory. But, a lot of things in life, you know, start off as theories until proven right or wrong. But then it's- Like you know, then it's- If I wanted to actually prove that right or wrong just from my point of view it's like, I don't know, I would uh, probably- I would probably go- would go look on Wikipedia for, uh... ''Harry Potter'' or whatshername, the author, I know it's a woman, I forget what her name is but because I didn't know I never came up with-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' J.K. Rowling.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah that's it, J.K. Rowling, thank you. Uh, but anyway. Yeah I never cared mu- I never cared for ''Harry Potter''. No, but anyway- Uh... anyway what were we talking about- Oh yeah, proving theories, yeah I could just try looking it up on Wikipedia and see what they say on there. ''(Long pause)''<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Uh, I don't know, I don't think she's ever admitted something like that.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah okay, well then yeah she- She may or may not have actually she- She may or may not seen ''Labyrinth'', but I don't know, that's uh, one thing or another, um... Uh, but yeah, I've been still, you know, yeah, David Bowie played his role- <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Why do you not like ''Harry Potter''? I mean, have you ever read the books? I actually enjoyed them. Like, I thought a lot better of it after I read the books.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, I tried reading one of the books, but it's like I could not really get into it. And originally I did not like ''Harry Potter'' very much cuz... Harry was like, uh, in league- In competition with Pokemon. And-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Not it's not, it's two totally different worlds. It's way more advanced than ''Pokemon''.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh... Yeah but, yeah... Yeah but, this was like- This was like years ago, I don't remember all the details, so I guess it's like, uh... I don't know, it's like you know, I'm still saying I hate- I don't like Harry Potter that much... But it's like- But it's like, I forgot the original reason why- ''(Chris suddenly starts yelling)'' I WISH THIS STUPID INCOMING CALL WOULD- Ugh, that Bandai guy keeps getting- That Bandai person there keeps calling me back, that... It's like, you know, the beeping is- The beeping of his incoming call is just interrupting... the conversation, it's like you know, at points it's like the beeps interrupt you when you're talking and it's just like, it bothers me, I wish this guy would QUIT. I mean why doesn't he get through is skull- through his fuckin' skull I mean I told him right off when I called him back, that he was like- that he was just calling toll-free- "Call my- call your number toll-free but quit calling my number, shut the fuck up goodbye", I wish- I thought he was gonna- I thought he was gonna quit 'cause he hasn't called for like, five or ten minutes, then he starts calling again and interrupting the conversation with you! <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yeah, he should have way more respect, I mean, obviously you weren't answering for a reason. <br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, what- 'Cause you know, 'cause I'm not- 'Cause I know he's a troll. And I don't- I've already established that I know that he's a troll. And I asked him to- And I asked- And I pretty much just forced- I pretty much, uh, raised my voice against him and told him to stop, but he's continuing on and on! <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' That's... That's horrible, he shouldn't do that.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' You're gonna have to be more firm with him.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''(Stress noise)'' Yeah. It's like you know, what- It's like you know, what I was saying is just I'm not exactly sure what to say, other than what I've already said.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Right, well I mean, let's go back to better things. Um... If you don't like ''Harry Potter'', what books have you read recently?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' The last book I read was Pamela Anderson's ''Star''. I thought that was a good story, for what she did.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh, I've never read that one.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh yeah it's a good story, it's like, basically, she's like- It's like a book about- It's like, uh, as if she was writing her own life, but she was like renaming the characters, renaming herself Australia (?). Which is like you know, it's like- <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' That sounds crazy, I mean, I wouldn't put much stock in what Pamela Anderson does anyway, it's like when Courtney Love tried to do a manga, it's like, no thanks.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Hm. Well it's not- I mean, like you know, yeah... You know, it showed that Pamela Anderson was definitely a smart woman, it's like you know, I wanted to appreciate her as, you know-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I'm pretty sure she had a ghost writer. I'm pretty sure she did.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' No, it- No, I- She pretty much- I do believe she said so herself, she wrote the book herself.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' That's all publicity.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Anyway, still- Still, I've read the- I've read most of the book, and I- and I've enjoyed it. It's a pretty good story.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I know but like, celebrites never write their own books. They just don't have time. They just slap their name on it. I mean, uh, how about any other books?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uhhhh... Yeah, other than that- Other than ''Star'', I haven't read- I haven't read too many other books. ''(Long pause)'' Uh, it's like you know, I've either- either been watching- I've either been watching television or playing video games... Uh, other than ''Star'' I haven't read a book since I-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' You know what you should read, you should read ''Catch-22''.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I've heard of th- I've heard of ''Catch-22''.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' It's a great, great book.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I've heard that- Yeah, oh you know, that reminds me of this joke I heard Pamela Anderson- On the show Pamela Anderson starred in called ''Stacked''. And then it's like, uh... Oh shoot, how'd that joke go... Um... Yeah anyway it was a Catch-22 pun right there, but I'll have to watch that episode again to, uh, find- figure out how it goes-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Do you even know what a Catch-22 is?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' "A Catch-22"? <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yeah, do you even know what that is?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Ummmm... I think it's like- I think it's like a sexual touch, or something?<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' No, that's a innuendo. Um, a Catch-22 is where you're "Damned if you do, damned if you don't".<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Ohhhh. Oh yeah, I see that now, yeah, okay. Damned if you do, damned if you don't, yeah I get it. I get it, yeah. M'kay. Anyway, I was- Anyway, I'm right now I'm just, uh... I just got my copy of, uh, ''Star''. Uh, right by my side, so I was just looking at the, hm... About the author, it's like- Okay, yeah, I'm looking on the inside cover on this inside here... Hmm. Yeah it talks about the, uh, author company, uh, "Atria Books"? Uhhh, it says here "This book is a work of fiction; names, characters, places and incidents are-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' You know what was a really good book, that I really liked? ''Battle Royale''. The novel, not the manga, that was awesome. <br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' "Battle Royale". Hm. Okay, well I'm looking at- Oh yeah, I remember you telling me about a couple of books recently that uh, you were in- that you were in- Uh, I should defintely look those up, I wrote them down in my thing here...<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yeah, like the "Looking Glass Wars."<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''(mumbles confusedly)'' Yeah, oh, oh you're, no that's not it, I'm on the wrong page. Oh, here it is. Oh yeah, you were telling me about, uh, "The Looking Glass Wars," "(Red?)," and "Arch Enemy."<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yes. And "Seeing Red." Um, so, I mean, what books do you own, I mean, don't you own books that you can read?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh, I do own books. I got, I got, nearly all the Goose-, all the original "Goosebumps" books, ''(mumbles something)'', and some of the "Fear Street" books too.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well do you have any adult books? Like, like, not erotic books, but adult books.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh, [''pause''] um, well other than that, yeah, no, not really. Oh wait, I do have, actually, oh yeah, uh, oh shoot, I have a couple of other books in my collection as well. I have "To Kill a Mockingbird," and, uh </font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Oh good!<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' and, uh this other one, I think this other one, I have this other one that I read back in High School as well. I think it was called ''The Giver.'' [''pause''] Yeah, I remember- I remember the story of ''The Giver.'' It was like, uh, yeah, we were living in- the setting was like, uh, a black-and-white time- time, where everyone was like, uh, the same, not too different from each other, and, uh, instead of like, you know- married couples and stuff, uh, just having a lot of children, it's like, uh, yeah they have birth mothers and, uh, birth fathers in these hospitals or whatever. They give birth to the babies, and the- and the- uh, and the- they don't even bother recording their actual birthdates or giving them their names there. They just, um, give them to the family and, uh, and think they do- I think they give- [''stammers''] I think the parents name the child. [''stammers more'']-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' [''extremely annoyed''] Okay, well anything else?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, but anyway, yeah, let me- let me finish talking about ''The Giver'' though. Um, but anyway, it centered around- around the, uh, boy, who, uh, was- was gi- was given- was given a job of being the giver, and was learning about all this stuff outside the, uh, black-and-white world where it's all colory- colory- he sees colors and everything, and then he starts seeing the color '''red''', among, uh- among other [''unintelligible''], and then he's like, 'oh, I'm starting to appreciate life now, then I wanna get out of this world,' then they ended the book, he takes his little brother and, uh, gets out of there, and then, it's like an open-ended- it's like an open ending there, so you're not really sure what happens beyond that. Anyway, uh, it's a- it's a compelling story, it's pretty go- Oh yeah! [''chuckles''] Here's a funny one! There's like a part in the beginning of the book, ''The Giver'', uh, where d- where this child is like waiting in line to get a ''snack'', and then- and then it's like a long line, and he's been waiting this- this whole time, and he's like, 'why have we been waiting so long? I want my ''smack''.' [''chuckles''] <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' [''forces a laugh''] <br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' And then the adults tear- and then the adults hear him, and then they- and then they- and then they hear him and they give him a ''smack''!<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' So, is there anything else on your mind? Like, I mean the email you sent me really worried me.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh yeah, well... Yeah, it's like when I'm still get- I'm still getting used to like, you know... Yeah, but, it definitely puts in perspective of why I'm often confused and blank. It's like points when I'm trying to think of something... It's like you know, it's like I'm switched over to Chris- To... Christopher. And, uh...<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Chris... You know it doesn't happen like that, right? Multiple personalities never surface at the same time, and they usually don't know about each other, like you would have that blank feeling and that is it. That sounds like possession, that's NOT schizophrenia, that's NOT multiple personalities. <br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Um...<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Plus, you'd be born with it. You can't get it because of Autism. Or from a name change.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay, well uh, describe to me though, what uh- "Possession", what is that?<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Possession?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uhh, this kind of possession that we're talking about here.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' It's a possession... I mean, that's the only time I've ever heard of two different personalities being manifested in the same body at the same time. It means you're being controlled by an outside force.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' And... Sorry, what was that last one?<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' You know, like demons.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''(Long pause)'' I don't know. But it's like, point is, it made me realize, like you know, yeah, you know... Me being Christian, I was- I was definitely the wuss and the [[Naive|gullible]] one. But then it took- And then it took the uh, dynamic half that I've been- that I've been talking to lately, uh... Made me- <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Those are personality traits, those aren't personaliTIES.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''(Longer pause)'' Okay, well I don't claim to know everything about multiple personalities or whatever... <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I mean you just can't make another personality come out like that, like it's not possible, you couldn't do it right now.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''(Even longer pause)'' Uh well I don't know, we'll just have to see about that, won't we? Heh. Anyway...<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I mean, if you think you have that much control over it, you should be able to do it right now.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''(Now Christopher)'' Yeah I pretty much just did! Heh, I pretty much just did. I'm the dynamic one right here!<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Okay... So you're a completely different person. You don't know anything I've talked to you about before, you're completely different.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I've caught wind of some of the conversation when you were talking to Christian, uh... Yeah. But, I don't know all the details, other than the fact that I've got ''Star'' right next to me.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Right... I mean, it still doesn't sound plausible at all. It really doesn't. I mean... That's like stuff you should go to a doctor for, 'cause that's definitely not healthy, like, you know that could be the sign of a brain tumor, right? <br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ...Really?<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yeah, actually, it is. Like, next you're gonna be telling me that you feel like you're falling when you're standing.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Falling on my standing?<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' No, like, people, when they stand, they could be standing or sitting, and they close their eyes and they feel like they're falling? That's a huge sign of a brain tumor. But this is what it sounds like, like it doesn't sound like multiple personalities, maybe you should really go get that checked out. I mean, this is what I'm going into, this is what I study. I'm really scared for you.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''(Pause)'' Uhh hang on, I'm gonna switch back. ''(Makes a noise to indicate that he "switched back")''<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''(Laughing at him)'' There no "switching back"... What??<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''(Christian again)'' Uhh, yeah. Uhh, I heard a little bit, uh, you said something about... Yeah, well I did- I did hear about this, uh... Yeah, I'm definitely gonna schedule to see my uh, psychiatrist Dr. Pryce about this, ''(Kacey talks over him)''<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''(Still laughing at him)'' No, you need to see a doctor! Like, these are horrible symptoms! <br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Well anyway- Look, anyway, yeah, psychiatrist, I got- I still got Dr. Pryce's number, he was the psychiatrist I went to during that year I was kicked out of, uh... the, so... I think-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' No, Chris, these are real medical symptoms. Like, so if this is an excuse, you need to quit it. Because if not, you are probably extremely, extremely sick. <br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''(Long pause)'' Hm. I see. Hm. <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Like, this isn't cool to play around with.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Alright, but uh, yeah, to make it- To make a point though, he has- I mean, before last- Even before last Sunday, he's come out a few subtle times, like you know, uh... Yeah, when I play Guitar Hero, he comes out like you know definitely, he plays Guitar Hero a little bit, and I-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Who is "he"? Who are you talking about? If we're gonna play this way, fine. Who is "he"?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I'm talking about Christopher. You just talked to him a moment ago.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Okay... So there's two of you.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' There's a big difference- There's a big difference right there just in the voice tone. <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''(Long Pause)'' And you can control both of you at will, then?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' More or less, yeah. <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Okay, like I said, that really sounds like, um, symptoms of something wrong with your brain, but you know, what do I know, I'm only going into the medical field.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ...Alright well yeah, I mean, I'll definitely talk to my... Yeah I'll get in touch with my psychiatrist to talk to him about it, or uh... <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' A psychiatrist isn't gonna be able to help with that, like, a real doctor would have to, like... If you told this to a real doctor, they're gonna be like, "Oh my God, you need help NOW". So like I said, if this is just an excuse, you need to quit it. Because this can get you, like, in serious shit.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''(Long pause)'' Hmm. Well yeah, that's a lot for me to think about. Uhh... Yeah, but... I can schedule an appointment with my uh, with my physician Dr. McGovern, uh... Talk to him- Talk to him about that, and see what- See- Get his opinion... He's a medical doctor. Over at my- Over at, uh, Martha Jefferson Medical Clinic, nearby.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Is he a General Practitioner?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Okay. Well then he can refer you to a specialist. But I mean, when's the last time you saw him? <br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh, I'm not sure, last time I saw him was- I usually see him about, uh, every three or four months. Uhhh, so it's like I'm...<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Alright well when was the last time you saw this psychiatrist?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh, the last time I saw a psyc- A psychi- I saw Dr. Pryce was like, uhh... Uhh, two thousand six or seven. Something like that.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' But, I thought you said in [[30 August 2009|the video]] and in the email that psychiatrist helped you bring out your other side, so... Why was there, like, a two-year delay? That doesn't make sense to me. At all.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uhh, when I was saying- Yeah, pretty much when I was saying that in the video... That was pretty much just something to, uh, give the trolls something- for the trolls, uh, inquiry, like you know, "Oh, you should go see a doctor", or something like that, it was just- It was just fuel for da trolls.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Um... Well... You used it against me too, I mean, I... That sounds like lying. I mean, did they give you any medicine?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uhhh, yep, I mean, they... Yeah, McGovern, they prescribed for me- Actually no, not McGoveren, original prescriber, it was like a doctor, this happened like, I don't know, in 1990-something. I was prescribed Paxil for [[stress]]... For stress problems, you know, keeping my stress down, whatever, but then I got upgraded- And then that went- And then Paxil went out- went out of date, and so I had to be switched to Paroxetine. Uh, but basically I- I was actually- Basically after- During the whole time I took- I took Paxil and Paroxetine, I never actually saw any emotional difference. Or, uh, like I mean you know, I felt- I mean, I still felt STRESS. And uh, all that- and all that stuff, it's- I- And then- Yeah, I recently- And I recently stopped taking the Paroxetine about a month ago, I mean, and then I felt- and then I- and then I fe- I still felt a little difference other than the fact like you know, I'm definitely feeling more CONFIDENT. <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well that's... That's good.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, I mean, like, you know... There's also, like... Yeah, one of the original-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' You do know that the psychiatrist is just the person who gives you drugs, they're not like a psychologist.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Well I don't know the difference between a psychiatrist and a psychologist, other than-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I just told you what it was. <br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah you just told me, yeah, psychiatrist is what gives me medicine, psychologist is, uh... Okay, psychologist, explain that to me, please. <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Psychiatrists give you-<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' No, ''psychologist''.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I'm doing both, Chris. <br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Psychriatrist gives you the medicines, and psychologists are the people who are like therapists that you talk to.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Ohhhhhhhhhh. Ohhhhh. Okay, now I get it.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' This is simple stuff.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Okay, well you see, I did not know that. I did not know that. That's new to me, so I learned that, and I'm going to keep that in my head.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yeah, they have different degrees, and different areas of study.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I see<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I mean, are you still on any medications at all?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Hmm, yeah, I'm taking Lipitor to try to keep my cholesterol maintained , but it's like, you know, my cholesterol wasn't really that high, but, you know, when I started Lipitor, I just felt, uh, I just felt, you know, it'd probably be a good step to keep it down.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Uh, uh, did your doctor recommend that?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, McGovern recommended the, uh, Lipitor. He, as like an optional thing, but, you know, if you want to it's a good idea. So, yeah, so, I've been taking Lipitor for, I don't know, a few years now.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' ''(mortified)'' But, you're- you're twenty-seven. That's not something you should worry about at twenty-seven.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Cholesterol.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' But- that- you don't get it. most twenty-seven year olds don't have to worry about that. That's for- old people who can't help it.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I don't know, yeah, but this was like a few years ago when I was threatened over bad cholesterol and trying to maintain it, along with exercise. ''(stress sigh)'' Yeah, I don't remember that conversation very well.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Maybe you should just start eating healthier. I mean, I don't really know what you eat, but, obviously if you're on Lipitor when you're twenty-seven- I mean. What do you eat?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, mostly I eat like, mostly I eat like chicken sand- or-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' From where? Chicken sandwiches you ''make'', or, from where?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh, you know, like from, grilled chicken sandwiches like from McDonald's or IHOP-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' You know that just because it's grilled doesn't mean that it's good for you. </font><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Well it's better than crispy <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' It, it doesn't matter. It's still bad for you. I mean, that's like saying- I don't even know. That's like saying that,um, eating a gallon of ice cream is better than eating a whole cake, because the ice cream has dairy.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I never heard that before.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' That's 'cause I just made it up.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''[chuckles]'' Oh, you just made it up. Oh. Okay. You just made it up.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yep. Ha, I mean, but this isn't funny. You- you could- that shows a serious problem, you could be, uh, you could '''die''' from this.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''(long pause)'' Uh, well, if you suggest it then I could stop taking the Lipitor and uh-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' '''NO! NO! NO!''' I mean if you're on it, you're on it for a reason! You need to stop eating all that fast food, I mean, how much, okay, you've got to eat something other than chicken sandwiches. What else do you eat?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Oh, I eat- I eat- I eat salads.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Okay, salad doesn't always mean healthy. I mean, what do you put on the salads? Do you put tons of dressing on it? Is there meat on it? Is there, uh- where do you get the salads from?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' It's basically just like lettuce, tomato, carrots, some cheese-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' You see, that's where they get you, they put cheese on salads, I mean, where do you get these salads from?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''(pause)'' Yeah, they're like side salads from [[Wendy's]] or McDonald's.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Those- those aren't healthy, Chris. Just 'cause it says ''salad'', that- no!<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' (''protesting'') It comes with- it comes with real vegetables!<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' It- but just because it- okay, but do you put any dressing on it?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I do not put dressing on the salad.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I mean that's- that's good and all, but still- I mean there's gonna come a point where even this medicine's not going to help you. You know that, right?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Um,you're talking about the Lipitor, right? That's not gonna be good for me?<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' No, I mean there- there gets to a point where even modern medicine cannot help you because you've destroyed your body so much.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' ''(long pause)'' Oh, so much more stuff for me to talk to my doctor about.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yeah, I'm surprised he didn't talk to you about this already! I mean, don't you read the nutritional facts? They have to be on fast food now. <br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh, yeah <br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I mean, okay, do you eat anything that does '''not''' come from a fast food restaurant?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, uh, yeah, I sometimes, sometimes I buy food from the grocery store.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Like, like what? What do you have, like do you eat lean meat? Do you have fresh vegetables? Or is it just stuff like Hungry Man dinners and pizza?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Once or twice, in like a- in like a month I have like a Hungry Man.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' You know those things are awful for you, right? You know that they have like- one hundred per- like, they have like a '''thousand percent''' sodium, and tons of calories.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, but mostly I have- mostly I eat like Healthy Choice- I- mostly I would eat Healthy- it, uh- of the frozen dinner varieties, I would eat Healthy Choice.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Even then those are bad for you, 'cause of all the preservatives. I mean, they have to have them, because it's not fresh. I mean- okay, that- is that all you eat, I mean, how many of those do you eat a week, 'cause you should only be eating them once a month at most, and even then that can hurt you.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' (''stress sigh'')<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Chris, I'm sorry, I mean, this is- this is what I'm going to do. I'm gonna help people with this, that's why I'm trying to get fit myself, just, y-y- wow!<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I mean I'm tryin' to remember my, uh- I'm tryin' to remember some of the, uh, eating schedule from the past, like, month, er, from the past, like, month.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Okay, okay, well can you cook things?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, I can cook.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Like what? Like, okay, name the things that you can cook, but only if you cooked them for yourself and ate them within the last month.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' (''thinking hard to himself'') Within the last month. I can- I can cook the- I can cook vegetables in the, uh- </font><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Like what? </font><font color="#0033FF"> pot. Like green beans. Corn.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' What do you cook them in?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I put 'em- I put 'em in like- a pot- like a pot, with some water, and put them in the- I put them in the- on top of the oven.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Yeah, but are they fresh vegetables or are they canned?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, they're canned.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Okay, that has tons of sodium too, Chris! It's all the hidden stuff. I mean, you need to get some fresh produce. I need to take you to like a farmer's market or something.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' (''coughs or something'') Excuse me. Yeah, I guess you probably- I guess you probably do. I dunno, er, I mean- I mean- (''pause'') that's a lot for me- that's a lot for me to think about right there.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I mean, this sounds like eating habits that means, you know- '''this is why people don't live past thirty or forty.''' You know that, right? I mean, do you at least- do you exercise, um, you know, to ''balance'' it? I mean, like, I know you said we were going to go jogging, but, um, how often do you exercise, and what do you do? Do you do cardio?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' I do exercise. I walk about- I walk about a half-hour to an hour a day, (''pause'') around the neighborhood.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Well you know, you need to get your cardio up, you need to break into a jog or something.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, that's pretty strenuous. I- I- I mean-<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' No, it's not strenuous, your body should be used to this! You- you just need to get you heart-rate up... to a certain beat-per-minute. I mean, just power-walking would work. How are you going to go jogging with me if it's so 'strenuous'?<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Uh, maybe I was exaggerating when I said strenuous. Hmm, but, yeah, mostly, yeah, it's, I mean, I'm just sayin' mostly I- mostly I do walk. And sometimes I do speed it up a little bit.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' See, this is the stuff that I- this is why I want to become a nurse, 'cause I see people doing stuff like this and I want to help them, because this stuff- it hurts me on the inside.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Hmm. I'm sorry.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' I- I can't stand to see someone hurt their body so much.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' (''long pause'') Yeah, I hear ya. I do. (''pause'') Yeah. I'm like one that needs help in this sorta thing.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' (''long pause'') Okay, well I'm- I'm gonna go, I've gotta finish up some homework.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Yeah, okay, I'll let you go.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Okay, well, um, I'll send an e-mail, um, with, you know, some books and stuff and maybe, you know, a couple recipes and stuff. Um, you know, I'll just send you an all-around e-mail, so, can you, uh, check that? I'll- I'll send it in a minute. I'm just gonna send you some links.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Alright.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Okay, okay, well then, I'll talk to you later!<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Alright. Take care.<br />
</font><br><font color="#FF0066">'''Kacey:''' Alright. Bye.<br />
</font><br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:''' Bye-bye.</font><br><br />
'''(''call ends'')'''<br />
<br />
==External links==<br />
*<strike>mp3 of phonecall</strike> File not found and video removed from YouTube. Please re-upload and re-link ASAP.<br />
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[[Category:Trolling]]<br />
[[Category:Phone calls]]<br />
[[Category:Liquid Saga]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_8&diff=163154Mumble 82012-10-05T20:52:21Z<p>Irisviel: /* First Dibs on the Threesome Act (44:18 - 53:20) */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''Mumble 8''' is the eighth of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]], held on 17 [[February 2009]].<br />
<br />
Chris confirms he drank (recycled) his [[semen]]. There are discussions about [[gaybian|lesbian]] sex, the [[homos]] (with awesome raging from GeckoMantis), and an Oscar-winning performance by [[Sarah May]] (RIP).<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
{{incomplete}}<br />
<br />
* [[Donald Duck impersonation]]<br />
* [[Megan]]'s favorite band is [[Wikipedia:Guns N' Roses|Guns N' Roses]].<br />
* Chris will not call Rick Astley a [[homo]].<br />
* There is a feud between [[Molvanîa]] and Russia.<br />
* [[Wikipedia:Son Gohan|Gohan]]'s girlfriend is Chris's favorite ''[[Dragonball]]'' character.<br />
* Chris is asked to list [[Chris and religion|the ten commandments and the seven deadly sins]]. He reaches for his Bible because he can't remember. (Although, as a Protestant, the seven deadly sins would be irrelevant.)<br />
* Mr. Roboto gets kicked.<br />
* Chris says his pastoral counselor ([[Rocky]]) told him premarital [[sex]] is okay.<br />
<br />
[15:40]<br />
: Chris on premarital sex with [[Julie]]: After you get here, we could talk to my pastor about it further.<br />
: Julie: I've said it many times. I discuss it in my letter.<br />
: Chris: I'm just sayin'. After you get here, we could talk to my pastor about it.<br />
<br />
[17:00]<br />
* A troll suggests Chris looks for loopholes in everything to justify himself. Chris cuts him off.<br />
* Epic rage from the troll.<br />
* Chris asks for forgiveness. Says everyone has a different interpretation of the Bible.<br />
* Troll calls him out on his [[Homos|homophobia]]. Chris says he's taken it back, so it's ok.<br />
<br />
[24:00]<br />
* Chris sexual urges weren't as strong back when he had [[gal-pals|female friends]].<br />
<br />
[to be summarized]<br />
<br />
[45:30]<br />
* Chris is willing to perform a threesome involving two men. Julie is willing to do it with Chris and [[Emily]] then.<br />
* It's not gay if balls aren't touching.<br />
* Chris wants them to engage in [[Wikipedia:Tribadism|tribbing]].<br />
<br />
[47:20]<br />
<br />
* [[Sarah May]] thought Chris wanted her and Julie to have a threesome.<br />
* Since Chris asked Sarah first, she can have the first threesome with Julie.<br />
* Two women is Chris's limit.<br />
* Chris can't decide between Sarah and Julie<br />
<br />
[51:50]<br />
* Both women can't get pregnant because Chris would wear a condom.<br />
* The trolls explain the concept of friends with benefits. This is just too much for Chris to take in right now.<br />
<br />
[56:00]<br />
* The speed at which Chris produces [[Sonichu (comic)|his comic]] depends on [[Stress|how he is feeling]].<br />
* Chris should be able to draw more, say trolls<br />
* Chris will try to get a page done a day.<br />
* Derrick explains [[Wikipedia:Stream of consciousness (narrative mode)|stream of consciousness]] writing. Chris talks about storing shit in his memory, which is totally the opposite style.<br />
<br />
The following are not in order:<br />
<br />
* Chris confirms he drank (recycled) his [[semen]].<br />
* Chris doesn't go to [[McDonald's]] often, "maybe two or three times a week."<br />
* Chris says he measured his [[Duck|dick]] with a ruler.<br />
* Sarah May is so upset Chris called her Julie she attempts suicide.<br />
* Chris [[Chris and death|shrugs it off]], saying he still has Julie.<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' What's up?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Ahh, doin' okay, doin' okay. Got some [[stress]], but I'm okay.<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' Stress is bad.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm, haven't updated in a while-<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' We enjoy the new- we enjoy the preview for the new comic.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Now, now just a, just a [[Bob walks in|minor recent event]] that I won't go into, uh, it's just a minor inconvenience really. But it made me- mmm, basically in a nutshell my computer got turned off and I didn't turn it back on for a coupla days.<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' That is terrible. It remind me of the time my mama had taken away my computer. Because I, I spent too much time on it. And she said "You spend too much time on computer!"<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh. Goodness. Yeah. Yeah, but we don't have to go into that.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hey Chris, there's something I forgot to ask.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Do you think you could do your Dona- your [[Donald Duck impersonation]] for me, please?<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' He already did that before, didn't he?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[in his horrible Donald Duck voice]'' So ask me how was my day. What are we doin'? ''[quacks]''<br />
<br>''[Julie and others laugh]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris, how about, how about the- how about the Uncle Ruckus for everyone, please?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[equally horrible [[The Boondocks|Uncle Ruckus]] voice]'' Don't trust them new [[Niggos|niggers]] over there! Sing along if you know the words.<br />
<br>''[pause]''<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' Um, I do not believe Ruckus ever says that. And I am from Russia, so I do not see much of the show though. [pause] Well, you should come see Russia, Chris. It is nice.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sure it is.<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' Yes. It is very- although we have [[CWCville|high corruption in our government]], we are fine people, and we work hard for our lives.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I do not disagree with you.<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' Wait, you said that- are you saying that corruption is good thing?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. I, I don't like corruption. I'm just saying that I agree, I agree with you on the fact that y'all are proud people. And respectable. ''[pause]'' Okay?<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Like gays.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I guess, yeah.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' [in camp [[Homos|gay]] voice] ''Obviously.''<br />
<br>''[pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Chris, what's up?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Umm...nothing. Umm, lemme think...mmmmm...<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' I can't believe I'm talking to [[Liquid Chris|the real Christian Weston Chandler]]. It's mad.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, take a deep breath and accept it. 'Cause it's real.<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' We love you, Chris. That is why we are impressed by the fact that you would do this for your fans.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yep.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Accept no substitutions.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' This is wicked awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yep. Accept no substitute. Hm.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Nothing but net.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhh, actually it's more like dot com, more like dot com now.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> What did you say?<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Nothing but dot com and [???]<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Actually, what did you say a few minutes ago? I couldn't hear you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Say a few minutes ago? I, what, when I was talking to the nice Russian guy?<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' Yo.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' I didn't know, actually-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br>[Julie and a guy talk at the same time]<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' What did you say about me?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I said that you were a nice guy.<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' No, I was tal- I'm- excuse me Chris, but what [[Bryan Bash]] was saying to me. I could not hear him.<br />
<br>'''Bryan Bash:''' Um, that's your username, isn't it? "Nice Russian Guy"?<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' No, it is- no, it is Mr. Roboto. I enjoy [[Wikipedia:Styx (band)|the band Styx]] very much. We just get them here.<br />
<br>[''Bryan laughs'']<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay, good. So-<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Hello there, Chris. Sorry, I was having a bathroom break. [''pause''] And for the record, I love Styx too.<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' Styx is good band.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I never heard Styx, but I will not disagree with you.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Um, have you ever sung "[[Wikipedia:Come Sail Away|Come Sail Away]]"?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Um, I am afraid I have not heard that. Sorry.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Or "[[Wikipedia:Renegade (Styx song)|Renegade]]".<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That one neither. I'm sorry.<br />
<br>[''pause'']<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' You've never heard "[[Wikipedia:Mr. Roboto|Mr. Roboto]]"? ''Dōmo arigatō'', Mr. Roboto?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I've heard that used in cartoon shows, and other shows like that, other shows outside the cartoon.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Uhh-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I've heard the expression, but I've never heard the song. I didn't even know there was a song. So, um... just a minor ignorance because I did not know about it.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Oh, it's cool. Um, have you ever heard of [[Wikipedia:Rush (band)|the band Rush]]?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I've heard that, I've heard that band, yeah.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Rush is pretty awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris, have you ever heard about Guns N' Roses?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, Guns N' Roses, that was, uh, [[Megan]]'s favorite band.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' I like [[Wikipedia:Elton John|Elton John]], personally.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' ''[interrupts previous guy]'' Speaking of Megan, whatever happened to her?<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' You are [[Homos|gay]] for liking Elton John. In Russia, we beat up gays.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Dude. I like Elton John's music-<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' ''[interrupts]'' You are also gay.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' -I also like [[Wikipedia:Boy George|Boy George]]. Is that a problem?<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' Boy George is homo.<br />
<br>''[Mainly unintelligible as people shout over each other]''<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Hey Chris man-<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' Yeah. I am sorry. I apologize.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' So uh, speaking of [[YouTube]]... Just to say that he is actually gay. So uh, you know...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Who are we talking about?<br />
<br>''[long pause]''<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' You know the uh- ''[sounds like "[[Wikipedia:Never Gonna Give You Up|Never Gonna Give You Up]]"]'' -song...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh yeah. That was-<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' ''[interrupts]'' Yeah so that was- ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' He's not gay.<br />
<br>''[pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well I dunno, so... I will not pass judgment either way.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' What do you mean by "pass judgment"?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I mean I would not call him a homo or st- or whatever.<br />
<br>''[pause]''<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Why would you call him a homo anyway?<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' Because it is right to ridicule the a- the gays.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Russia must be a very violent place.<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' It is. You should come here.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' You are a very intolent person.<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' I am very tolerant. It is my culture.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Very much so...<br />
<br>'''Other Guy:''' Your culture is intolerant.<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' It is not my fault my culture is like this. I apologize for nothing.<br />
<br>''[Muffled]''<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' No. They killed communists.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yep. That's what I heard.<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' Heard what?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That Russia does not like communists. They-<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' ''[Interrupts]'' Oh we like communists. But stupid fascists killed communism. I would like to see communism returned. It was a fun time.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I never really liked Russia.<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' Well Russia doesn't really like you. I heard you were from- ''[unclear]'' -state [[Molvanîa]]<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Chris what's your- ''[Yelling]'' Shh! Hey Chris what's your favorite ''[[Dragonball Z]]'' character?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Ok-<br />
<br>''[Long pause]''<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' I'm gonna guess [[Wikipedia:Son Goku (Dragon Ball)|Goku]].<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No.<br />
<br>'''Guy:'''He's got that "Goku go get 'em" attitude.<br />
<br>'''Other Guy:''' I liked Piccolo myself.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I like [[Wikipedia:Son Gohan (Dragon Ball)|Gohan]]'s girlfriend. <br />
<br>'''Other Guy:''' Oh, did you know that "[[Wikipedia:List of Dragon Ball characters#Videl|Videl]]" [''the name of Gohan's girlfriend''] is the word Devil rearranged?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry. It's just a name.<br />
<br>''[Slightly unintelligible chatter about Dragonball Z]''<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Chris what do you feel about Satanists?<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Um... Uh yeah. I am not fo- I am not fond of those people. <br />
<br>'''Guy:''' You know they don't actually worship the Devil?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. I see. But anyway I am not fon- I am not really fond of them.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' I know one in college. A Satanist. He pretty much- They don't worship the Devil but instead they- ''[muffled by other people]''<br />
<br>'''Other Guy:''' Chris, you know the Ten Commandments? [pause] Do you know the Ten Commandments Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. I do.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' ''[overlapping]'' -Can you recite them for us?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, yeah. <br />
<br>'''Guy:''' ''[overlapping]'' In the order that they're supposed to be.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Give me a minute. ''[Sound of Chris wandering off, knocking stuff over]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris I don't think you should leave- ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br>''[pause]''<br />
<br>''[Something from Mr Roboto]''<br />
<br>''[pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright the uh- Ten Commandments. ''[clearly reading from his Bible]'' "Thou shalt have no other God before me. Thou shalt not make unto thee any craven [''sic''] image. Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord, thy God, in vain-"<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' ''[speaking over Chris]'' You are good at this...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> "-Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy. Honor [[Bob|thy father]] and [[Barbara|thy mother]]. Thou shalt not [[Death threats|kill]]. Thou shalt not commit adultery. Thou shalt not steal. Thou shalt not swea- bear false witness against thy neighbor and thou shalt not covet anything that is thy neighbors."<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Uh we were kinda hoping you'd recite them off the top of your head.<br />
<br>''[muffled]''<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' -Ah it's been a while since i read it. Name the seven deadly sins.<br />
<br>'''Other Guy:''' ''[muffled]'' I dunno why he asked that...<br />
<br>''[muffled. Something about sex before marriage. Various clicks from someone's computer]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah-<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' Yes. You are a whore if you have sex before marriage.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> EXCUSE ME? What did you say?<br />
<br>'''Mr. Roboto:''' I said nothing, Molvanîan bitch.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> EXCUSE ME?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah I heard him. Go ahead and kick that guy out.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Ok he's kicked now...<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> ''[in a very boyish voice]'' Son of a bitch...<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Seriously all the ones I know are- ''[muffled]''<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' I think it's true also though, I think he's a closet homo. Seriously.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well he's gone now, we don't have to worry about him anymore.<br />
<br>''[people yelling over each other]''<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' But he did bring up a good point. Isn't sex before marriage adultery? Isn't lusting after girls adultery?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupting]'' Listen, listen, listen.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Ok I'm listening.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Ok. My [[Rocky|pastoral counselor]] has told me herself that it's ok. As long as she and I love each other truly and very much.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes well Chris, well I ''[people talk over "her"]'' Let me finish! <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let her finish please. <br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Well in the Methodism I follow- there's no sex before marriage. <br />
<br>''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well it's um... Yeah...<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Um. Why do you think has a better interpretation of the Bible? Your counselor, or God?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Well... The Bible can can be [[CWC with Bible - Leviticus|misinterpreted in a number of ways]]. Umm-<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris, if I may? As a girl I don't (''?'') sex before marriage.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' I thought it was pretty straightforward. I mean... Jesus said himself that if you look at a woman whilst you're basically, you're maintaining a pretty- ''[talked over by Julie]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Julie we can talk about this further after you get here. We can talk to my- my uh- my pastor at my church about it further.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I've studied many times, I've discussed it in my letter.<br />
Chris: Yeah. But I'm just saying, that we can talk to my pastor about it. [muffled]<br />
<br>'''Guy:''': We're all just trying to help you out man. <br />
Other Guy: We don't want you to go to hell. We don't want you to go to hell for having premarital sex [Chris interrupts]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> God is forgiving.<br />
<br>'''Other Guy:''' Not on this planet.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh Jesus is forgiving.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Well What if...[interrupted]<br />
<br>'''Other Guy:''' well it's ok to have sex out of marriage, but it's not ok if you're gay, is that what you're saying?<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br />
<br>'''Other Guy:''' Chris, you seem to find try to justify yourself every time by adding loopholes to your Bible just so you can have premarital sex and everything and I don't fucking get it. You're trying to justify yourself for having a ''[[I am STRAIGHT|Playboy]]'', and you're trying to justif…and you're always justif...[interrupted by Chris] <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I AM NOT!<br />
<br>'''Other Guy:''' No! No! I'm not having a No! Fuck You! You're a fucking [[Chris and hypocrisy|hypocritical]] douchebag!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well sometimes I don't know everything, so excuse me…for that.<br />
<br>'''Other Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I will listen, I will. Listen, listen, I appreciate your help, but you know when it comes to religion I think, uh... our own individual interpretations each of us individually is uh as is important to us so my interpretation... and, uh, y'alls interpretation which are respectable uh- <br />
<br>'''Guy:''' [''interjects''] Which you're right!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ...are important<br />
<br>'''Other Guy:''' Okay, so Chris, uh, just wanted to know, why so much hate against the gays, I mean if religion can be interpreted any way... [''interrupted''] ...seriously.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> uh hmm. I... Okay well… Okay I take all the times I said hated the homos, but obviously when I said that I was uh under a whole bunch of stress, and I felt most uncomfortable around them and [[JERKS|men in general]], so I guess I just picked the wrong word, so I apologize.<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' Um, this is just like the time where'd ya-ya-you trying to say that a whole lot of you said were made at times of stress but um, sooner or later you know that isn't it you know going to be like... you can't retract every every statement because you made it out of stress, you know.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I know I can't retract every one, but those I am able to retract, I can and will.<br />
[''unintelligible'']<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I had a misunderstanding at that time<br />
<br>'''Guy:''' [''unintelligible''] had a lot of stress at that time.<br />
<br />
{{Transcription}}<br />
<br />
===Recycling (42:20 - 44:18)===<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Returning after being away for a while]'' Hmmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Welcome back.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yep.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> What was that about, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yep.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> What was that all about, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I just had to- My Mom asked me to uh, go take her clothes out of the washing machine and put them in the dryer.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> [something]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay, yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Uh, Chris, I have a question, actually.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> I have this friend... I think he- It's a different friend, I think he might be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Wow.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> He uh... After he's done masturbating he drinks his own semen, is that gay?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhhhh, no. I don't think s- I don't think so, because, uh... I've done that, it's called "recycling" it. <br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Guys-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Wait, let him answer.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, it's basically recycling, it's like uh, he doesn't necessarily have to lost it... Because you know, you think of it waste if you- If you banged it out... And then you uh, and then you put- It's like you flush it down the commode or leave it in the uh, condom and put it in the garbage can.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> But isn't it burned up by stomach acid?<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 3:'''</font> Yeah, it- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, yeah- Yeah, yeah, yeah, but... STILL. Still, it's good for the new sperm cells. And plus there's also- Plus I've learned on the Internet that there's... There's vitamins in the- In the sperm cells, as well. So like, it's like basically you're helping yourself when you do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> That's interesting. I hear that the-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Although- Although personally I've kind of gotten sick of, uh... Swallowing my own. So like, you know... So, lately I've just been disposing of them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Umm-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I mean it just depends on your own individual tastes. Uh, yes, Julie?<br />
<br />
===First Dibs on the Threesome Act (44:18 - 53:20)===<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Well I heard somebody say "Hi Chris", it sounded like a female, who was it?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't know, I wasn't paying attention.<br />
<br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:'''</font> Oh, that was me... My name's Emily.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Hi, Emily.<br />
<br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:'''</font> I really like your comics.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you. ''(Pause)'' Thank you very much.<br />
<br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:'''</font> I don't understand why you're still single, honestly.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Tell me about it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> But, Chris, you're-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh right, but I am in love with, uh, Julie... right there, who just spoke just now. But...<br />
<br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:'''</font> Oh, she sounds like she's really pretty.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hey, take that as a compliment Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Thank you.<br />
<br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:'''</font> Maybe we can have a threesome.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''(shocked/happy)'' Oh wow!<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> But-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, go ahead, Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> well, Chris has stated before that he does not want a threesome with two men.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well I will- Actually, Julie, I gave it some thought. And I am willing to do that for you. If you wanna do it with another- If you wanna do a threesome with uh, two guys... As long as, uh, I'm one of them... Uh, I'm okay with that. I've come to accept it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Alright, I guess... I'll accept a threesome with two women.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well- You hear that, Emily? After Julie and I have done it a few times we can invite you.<br />
<br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:'''</font> That'd be really cool! I mean we can go shopping at a sex store beforehand.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> You said with two guys?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh... yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Isn't that gay?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhhhmmm...<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Not if balls aren't touching. They say it's not gay if all balls are not touching.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah I'm-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Ball separation is key, guys. Ball separation is key.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Uh, you hear- You hear that, Julie? That's uh... an official for us in that sense.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris, wouldn't you like to be-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Well you know what I say- ''(Talking over each other)''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hang on. Julie, say that again please?<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Well, when we do have a threesome with two women, what would you like me and Miss Emily to do? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''(Takes a deep breath, excited)'' Wow. I guess I'll put it out in the open, because I thought I'd told you before, Julie, but um... You know I-<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> [something]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay, well, you know like how, uh, lesbians do like a scissor thing? Uh, yeah-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> You mean like "tribbing".<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, what was that?<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> You mean tribbing. Yeah, that's the actual term.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay, well... While two girls are tribbing, I put my dick between the two... Just- Between the two pussies. ''(Awkward pause)''<br />
<br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:'''</font> I think that would be really hot.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Seems kind of uncomfortable.<br />
<br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:'''</font> It's actually not, I've done it before.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Ooooh!<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Um, Chris, it's me, it's Sarah May.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi, Sarah.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I thought you were waiting for me and Julie to have a threesome.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh-<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I thought it was gonna be special.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Well-<br />
<br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:'''</font> There can be four now!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Heh... Or, uh, you know- Or Sarah, since, you know, I asked you first, we'll let you... We'll let you come over before Emily.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> But... I wanted it to be special, y'know, but...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It- It can be special, Sarah. It can be.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Okay... I'm really upset right now, I feel like you don't care about me.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sarah, I do care about you. I'm sorry I upset you.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> ...Thank you, Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> So how many men would you do it with?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh... I'd... I think, uh... Yeah I think, uh, two women is my limit. So like, you know... Just have to do it one at a time, but Sarah calls first dibs on the threesome act. <br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I don't really want this to be like a "First come, first served" type of thing, though. I want to know that you actually have feelings for me and Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well... I do have strong feelings for Julie more, but I have... strong enough feelings for you too, Sarah.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Are you into Polygamy?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Uh... Polygamy, it's like having more than one partner.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I think you're talking about be married to more than one women. No, no...<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Hey, so Chris, so we're obviously, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> I mean Polyamory.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Yeah, Polyamory.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Polyamory.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah well anyway that- Anyway, that refers to married to more than one women, being ''married''. Not, uh, getting with- Not getting- Not, uh, not having sex, basically.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 3:'''</font> Wait, doesn't this go back to the whole "sex before marriage" part-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, NO-NO-NO-No-No, let's not got into that now, let's not get into that again.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> I mean like... Having multiple partners. Like, in multiple relationships.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Wait, didn't you say that as long as you truly love the person you can have sex before marriage, but do you truly- Are you saying you truly love all these girls that you just met?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Uh. Uhhhhhh... Right.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 4:'''</font> Oh, hey! Hey, Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Let him talk.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhm... Tryin'... Mm. Hmmm.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Chris, why are you taking- ''[someone else talks over her]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm trying, I'm thinking!<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> -taking a long time.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, I'm thinking, I'm thinking. I dunno... Mmm.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I just wanna know that you love me. Do you?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sarah May, I love you at least as a friend. And, uh... And I love Julie, as my girlfriend... And, uh, you know, if Julie hadn't, uh, hadn't uh- No, no, I'm sorry, I take that- beginning of that statement back, um... But anyway, um... I do love you very much-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> So you love Sarah as a friend?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm saying I love Julie as a friend AND as a girlfriend, but I love Sarah May as a friend. And I would love for her to... take part with me and Julie in a threesome in the future. <br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> You'll have sex with your friends, though? That's kinda wrong.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, that's not- NO NO NO NO NO, that's not necessarily wrong, because if you want the relationship... to uh, go well, you should start off by being friends.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Chris, usually that stuff just leads to like, awkwardness, I mean obviously you're kind of... prone to that, it's not because of you, it just happens because let's face it, you haven't had the best luck here, it's not your fault, you're a great guy, it just happened, but let's face it, you need all the help you can get.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I- I- I appreciate your help. I appreciate your help. <br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> I personally think that you should just stick to one woman.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but, you know, sometimes, in a... relationship, that's... That's one way the couple can, uh, spice it up, make it more exciting, to re-ignite the spark. You know-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> So uh, what if you do that and you get both women pregnant?<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> But you, I thought you-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Wait, let him talk.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''(Pause)'' Uh... <br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Because that's happened before, I-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I would- I would be- I would wear a condom.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> What if it breaks?<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> [something]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''(Mildly shocked)'' Did you just say that this turns you on, Julie?<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> No, condoms kinda turn me off.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 3:'''</font> Also, Chris, both of my younger cousins were both born, not only from condoms but [something] I think you'll have to take that into consideration, it-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well- Hey- Well, still- Better off at least... the- At least having the protection.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> I know but I'm just saying like, you wanna have a baby be born like-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> And plus- And plus, if the first one breaks, I can always change- I can always switch it for another one.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> I'm just saying, threesomes are risky, I mean what if you... I mean, you don't wanna have two children born from different mothers. ''(Awkward pause)'' Okay, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Also, how would you-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Ah, we're over this, already, I'm talking about something else.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Alright, sorry buddy.<br />
<br />
===Stress (53:20 - 1:03:22)===<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well anyway, I- Well anyway, final point, uh... Sarah, you called for- Sarah, I will let you, uh, be the first to, uh, join me and Julie in a threesome.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I appreciate that, but I... I just, you know I don't wanna be like, the first of MANY, I want it to be special. I kind of accept, but... Your [something]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, Sarah?<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> -it's perfectly okay to have sex with her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Um... Yeah, you're right. I apologize. Sarah, it can be very special, and I am willing to make it as special as possible when it happens. ''(Long pause)'' Hang on a second, I got something else that I'm doing here. Mmm. ''(Typing)''<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Well, what I've noticed is there's like different- Seems like Chris has an old case of Friends With Benefits.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A- Wait, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Friends With Benefits, it's like, you have your girlfriend, and um, Friends With Benefits is like you're friends with somebody but you can still have sex with them. I used to do that back in my earlier twenties, but... I wouldn't really reccoment it because it really gets complicated.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Yeah that's what I was talking about earlier you guys, it starts out as Fuck Buddies, and a-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''(Loud Stress Sigh)''<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> -high percentage only leads to things getting awkward and kinda tangled up, it just-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear you, I need to take my- This is just a lot for me- For my mind to take in right now.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Oh, sorry, um... Also, I'm a cartoonist. I read your webcomic, it's pretty good and stuff.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Uh- ''[Audio messed up for 20 seconds]'' -I was wondering like, how long does it take for you to draw a page? I can crank out a page, three to four pages per day.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. ''(Stressed)'' Well it depends on how I'm feeling and what my mood is. I mean, I- It's like I could probably do like, about, your amount, or better possibly, I'm not saying totally, or fully with confidence, but uh... But you know, it just- it depends on how I'm feeling. It's like you know, when some- I have lot of things that get me down. And... And get me emotionally down. And uh, I have things that get me emotionally up and, feeling like a yo-yo, it just uh... gives me a dizzy feeling, it's like... I don't know. Just makes me feel uncomfortable and it's like, uh... Doesn't really get me into drawing that much there.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Uh... But see, the thing is, I've heard about your personal life and stuff. I heard that you're um, unemployed... <br />
<br>''[Audio is messed from 56:57 - 1:00:57. Eventually this one guy's voice can be heard. Apparently they're debating the pronunciation of "CWC".]<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Cwuck Guy:'''</font> Actually, without vowels it's more of a "cwuck". ''[Chris talks]'' "Cwuh-UH-Ck." ''[Chris talks]'' No, no, Chris. A "C" makes a "Cuh" sound, and the "W" makes a "Wuh" sound, so it's "Cwuck". ''[somebody else says something]'' I didn't say "Quack", I said "Cwuck." I'm just trying to pronounce the three consonants. ''[somebody says something]'' I haven't pronounced it any different, I'm saying "Cwuck". "Cuh-Wuh-Ck." ''[Chris and others talk for a few seconds]'' You know what, you know what Chris it might actually be a good idea to put an explanation into the comics for people who aren't in this chat. <br />
<br>''[Audio finally returns to normal at 1:03:22]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -four eyes. <br />
<br />
===Impressions (1:03:22 - 1:09:27)===<br />
''[Various people talk over each other, apparently they were talking about [[Punchy Sonichu]]]'' <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright well, excuse me, I misunderstood that. Well anyway, it's just a characteristic about Punchy.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Chris, I'm sure ''[something about China, the country]''<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> I'm just easily offended by things I see, and uh... You know, stereotypical- Like, last night we were reading it and some of us- Who was doing the voice of Punchy? I think it might be nice to have Chris listen. ''[Says whatever the dude's name is]'', was that you?<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Voice Actor:'''</font> Yeah, I was doing it.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Hey, could you show Chris your Punchy voice?<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Voice Actor:'''</font> Okay, give me a line for Punchy to say.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Umm...<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> "If I see that pickle one more tiiime!"<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 3:'''</font> "Wax on, wax off."<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Voice Actor:'''</font> ''(Punchy voice)'' "Wax on, wax off."<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's it?<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Voice Actor:'''</font> ''(Punchy voice)'' "[Something] and all my Sonichu Friends!"<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm...<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> That's bad, that's racist, man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> In the comic it says he's a martial artist, like...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, well, for the record, that's not what Punchy would sound like. But, you know, for a reference, Punchy would definitely sound more like... The guy who actually did the voice of Knuckles in the animation.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Oh, okay...<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> So he's basically just Knuckles.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 3:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No- No no no no, not bas- He's not basically Knuckles, I'm just saying that his voice would SOUND like knuckles.<br />
''[Everybody talks over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Well, he's got the same eyes as Knuckles, he's got the... like, the knuckle-duster things. And, y'know, he's being voiced by the same person as Knuckles-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> NO, not necessarily the same PERSON. Not necessarily the same person, but... Sounding similar. But not exactly- <br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> So essentially somebody doing the Knuckles voice. Some guy, who isn't the voice actor for Knuckles, doing the exact same voice for Punchy.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> ''[says something about someone named YouTubeLover]''<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> YouTubeLover asked, what was Rosechu's favorite food?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmmm... Italian.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Awesome Guy:'''</font> Pickles.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> NO. Kick that guy out.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Meatwad:'''</font> Who do I kick? I did not see who it was who spoke.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Oh, it would appear we have the voice of Meatwad here.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 3:'''</font> No, you do not.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Okay...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's funny. Just sounded like Meatwad there.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Yeah, sorry. ''[says something about doing voices]''.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I- I can do- I can do it a little bit better. Listen-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Meatwad:'''</font> "Go out and zap it to the extreme!!"<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Does Meatwad impression. I have no idea what he says.]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Um, I'd say his was better, Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Meatwad:'''</font> Yeah! ''[Says something else, his impression is as hard to understand as Chris's]''<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> I think Chris's is better.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 3:'''</font> Nah, I like his.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Voice Actor:'''</font> I can do a pretty good Carl.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Oh, come on, let's go.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Voice Actor:'''</font> ''[Does awesome Carl impression]'' "Hey, come back ovah here! You haven't even messed up my house yet!" ''[says something else as Carl but people laugh over it]''<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Hey, has anybody seen Metalocalypse?<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Yeah, I have.<br />
<br>''[Several people do impressions of Metalocalypse characters and talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Guys, guys, shut up. Let Chris do it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You want me to do Carl?<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Sorry, I had to mute everybody to give you a chance to talk.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay, so you want me to do Carl. Just for the record, you want me to do Carl.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, let me see, um... ''(Does his "Carl impression")'' "Gonna get it on tonight! We're gonna have ourselves a big ol' piece a meat there! Hey, Cup. Your- Your ass is cashing me. You're cashing a check. You're writing up a check that your cash- That your ass can't cash."<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Heh heh heh. That was pretty good!<br />
<br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:'''</font> That was really good.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''(Still as "Carl")'' "We gonna get it on tonight! Getting it on tonight!"<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> It's like I'm watching Aqua Teen Hunger Force.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Chris, can you do any of the voices from Metalocalypse?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''(Pause)'' Uh...<br />
<br>''[Someone does an impression of Nathan Explosion. Hard to tell if it's Chris or not.]''<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Uh, I think that was pretty lame, I know what the voice sounds like, and no. That's just not it.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Chris, can you do Dr. Rockzo?<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 3:'''</font> Yeah, can you do Dr. Rockzo?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> "I AM DR. ROCKZO, THE ROCK AND ROLL CLOWN! I DO COCAINE!!!"<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Dr. Rockzo:'''</font> Y-y-y-y-YEAH!<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Nice.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Dr. Rockzo:'''</font> Yeaaah!!<br />
<br />
===Comics and Toys (1:09:27 - 1:17:43)===<br />
<font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> So, um, Chris. I'd like to have a friendly challenge with you. Seeing as how we're both artists and we're pretty much, um... We're pretty much both, um... artists. I'd like to- You know how you say you do a page a day? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhh, yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Alright, well, I'd like to do a week challenge. Starting on Monday, you know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Monday next week.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Yeah, starting Monday next week, we will each challege to draw one page of whatever comic you wish, like you can do Sonichu, and we have to do something entirely new per week, from Monday until that Sunday, so it'll be seven days, seven page comic per day. I was wondering if you wanna do that challenge with me?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, that sounds... That sounds cool.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Okay. Also, um... Let me re-post something. I did a portrait of my girlfriend, if you wanna see. Hold on.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, I'll take a look. I mean, uh... I would relate.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Alright, it should be to your left.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah I see it. Let me just copy and paste that.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> To my web browser. <br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> I'm going to draw a small seven-page comic featuring Mr. Skittles. Also, to be fair, it doesn't have to be colored, it can be black and white, if you wish, because it just some people take their time with their work, but... It's just seven pages of new material a week.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright. Hey, that's a good drawing, by the way, of your girlfriend.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Thank you. Took me about five hours to work on.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay. Hey, is she actually blowing through a bubble wand, 'cause it's kinda hard to see the handle.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Oh yeah, she's blowing through a bubble wand, she loves to blow bubbles.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, that's sweet. Hey Julie, you should take a look at this.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hmm? Oh, that's pretty good.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Chris, next time you come to Mumble, I'll try and show you a sketch of Mr. Skittles next time.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay. You know you could upload your images onto this image hosting site I know, hang on I got it bookmarked, um... <br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh... Oh yeah, DeviantArt.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, you can upload there.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Laugher:'''</font> Ha ha ha ha ha.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> ...That was a great laugh, can you do that again? ''(Pause)'' Yeah, I thought not.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Hey, Chris, what do you think about more contemporary- Well, not exactly comtemporary, but uh, some of the more famous graphic novels from The West, we're talking stuff by Alan Moore and Neil Gaiman, like uh, you heard of any of that?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I never heard of those.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> The Watchmen? You know, the most celebrated graphic novel of all time...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I- Hey. I have heard of Watchmen. As a matter of fact, I know of the uh... They got season 1 of the uh, the web- Of the uh, animated comic of that on the PlayStation Network. So I have heard of Watchmen. I thought- I wasn't sure- Is there actually a character who looks like Batman in that series?<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Uh, you're thinking of Nite Owl, and um... The whole thing is that Watchmen is supposed to be a spoof of the Golden Age comics, and Nite Owl is supposed to be a spoof of the techno genius archetype of superhero who uses his wealth and technology.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, so he is like Batman, and such. <br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> It's like a [[parody]].<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Yeah. My personal favorite's always been Rorschach.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't know, I haven't seen Watchmen yet.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Well, it was originally a graphic novel.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, seen, or uh... have it, yet.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> And I doubt the movie's going to be very good, they usually screw up the movies, and seeing as how the guy who directed 300 is doing it, I think it's just gonna be a overdone pile of garbage.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Alright sorry, I had to let my dog out, he was scratching in the dark. Um, the thing is that Zack Snyder he's good at certain types of movies, and I'm not sure that Watchmen is really his-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well. I'm not saying that I'm necessarily gonna be watching the movie... But, you know, because I hear good talk, I may consider downloading a... episode or two of the Watchmen animated comic. On the PlayStation Network.<br />
<br>''[something about how it's not animated and it's going to be on DVD soon]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Hey Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> I actually wanted to ask you a question, uh... Since we're talking about comic books and graphic novels and everything, do you read any comic books, do you have a favorite comic book at all?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, Sonic the Hedgehog series. From Archie Comics, I have the premiere issue zero, that where I based the uh, [[Sonichu 0|number zero comic book]], based on the number there.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Oh my god, me too, I have issue number zero too!<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Actually, Chris, I have another question from, um, a fan. How often do you eat at McDonald's? Uh, when do you go there?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, not very often, I'd say like, uh... You know, two or three times a week.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Any specific times?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, not specifically, it just depends on how I feel.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Right.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> What about the Happy Meal, do you still get those?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh... No. I used to, but I don't nowadays.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> What about the toys, I mean you can still buy the toys separately from the Happy Meals.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah... But I don't need necessarily now to collect the toys... But it's not like I, uh- It's been a long time since I actually bought a toy by itself from McDonald's or Burger King. ''(Pause)'' Yeah, so like I said, that's uh... I haven't done that in a long time.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Oh... Are most of the toys in your room from past... like, you collected?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh... Yeah, most of which.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> So you don't buy toys, like, recently?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well I mean I buy like- I bought, like... Transformer toys, recently.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> I have another question from a fan, uh... YouTubeLover was saying, you have so many toys, so when do you play with them? Or, do you play with them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I play with them sometimes. You know just to at least, change them from robot, to vehicle, to robot and back, and back. Hm... It's kinda like, uh, one way to, uh, put my mind off something else, or relieve stress events, it just- ''(Suddenly getting defensive about it)'' I don't care- I don't care, it's like, you know, people are young at heart, and I consider myself young at heart, ''so there''.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Oh, well that's okay, I mean I built my Gundamn models and stuff, so it's cool, man.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Which grade do you build?<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Which grade do you build?<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Oh, I have all the grades, I have like everything.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> I only do like... first grade-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Anyway, let Chris talk.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No that's okay, you all continue, 'cause I don't have anything to contribute to the conversation.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Well Chris, we want to hear stuff straight from you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I mean, I... don't particularly have any Gundam models myself. So, I wouldn't- So, I can't really say. Myself. <br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> But still, you do have toys, right, I'm just saying that's cool.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I mean, it's alright, I don't mind other conversations besides from ones around me. I mean let's all talk-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Yeah but you're here and essentially... You don't really come here much.<br />
<br />
===Duck Tales (1:17:43 - 1:28:30)===<br />
<font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:'''</font> Hey, Chris, I have another question for you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:'''</font> Would you ever get your... duck pierced, if your sweetheart thought it would be really hot and it would improve your sex life?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhhhhh... I'm sorry could you repeat that question again, my "duck pier"?<br />
<br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:'''</font> Your duck pierced, you know, your...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Ohh! Oh, right, oh. I would never have- I do not have a piercing-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Prince Albert.<br />
<br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:'''</font> No but would you do it, because, I mean-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No.<br />
<br><font color="#CD5555">'''Emily:'''</font> It can increase the pleasure.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, uh... Even that considering, I still would not get any piercings.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Yo, what's a "duck"?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's an- It's a- It stand- It's like, replacing the "I" with a "U" in the word "dick".<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> So it's a euphemism. ''(Pause)''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's just another word I made up, another word for dick, but without saying "dick". It's-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Do you know what a euphemism is?<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 3:'''</font> Okay, it's called a euphemism.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> "Euphemism"...<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> It's basically another word for saying a nicer word for something that-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> I understand, I understand.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> And you spell it Y-O-O-P-H-I-M-E-S-M.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah- Uh, excuse me, I'll be right back.<br />
<br>''[Silence for a few seconds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Seriously guys, we-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''(In the background)'' Kittyyyyy... ''(More silence)'' No kitty! Outta the kitchen. Shoo! Shoo-shoo! ''(More silence for a while, some rustling and breathing heard)''<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Are you okay?<br />
<br>''[More silence]''<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Hey Chris, I have a question here from a fan.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Wait for him to get back first.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Oh, I thought he was back.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> He's feeding the kitty.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> I like cats, they're very cute.<br />
<br>''[Some more talking about cats]''<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Okay, quiet.<br />
<br>''[Sound of water running or something, more rustling. A long period of silence. More water running. Chris can be heard talking to the cats a few times.]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris? Hello? ''(Chris sighs in the background)'' Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, hang on, I'll just put my headphones back on. Yeah, I'm back.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hey Chris, can I ask you something?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Um...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's okay, what is it?<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> It's about... You know, uh...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, is it sexual?<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Kind of.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's okay.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> It's about... Down there.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> It's about down there, your... duck?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, it's okay. I don't mind talking about it, what is it?<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Is it really... Naturally bent, I- I know it ''[something]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Is it actually what?<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Tell me about why your duck is bent, please.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Oh, bent. Yeah. I- I did- It's... It's- It's natural, it's natural, toward- Toward the end, it has a downward bend. It's downward. Uh, it-<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris, I'm a doctor. I've never heard in my life anything like that.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You're a doctor?<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I want to be one and I'm studying up on it, remember?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Hmm... Actually I don't remember you telling me that, so that's news to me.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> It was like one of the first things I sent you. How do you not remember?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Julie, I forgot that one, but yeah- That's right, yeah, you did tell me about that. Sorry about that. Well anyway, you are studying to be a doctor.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes, and never in my life have I heard that it... Chris, was it- Was it a penis pump? It's okay if it was, I just want you to tell me the truth.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh... Well, actually, um... Well, I don't- Okay, I don't know why it's bent downward, I just assumed it was natural.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> You must have done something, come on.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well... Maybe because I've been wearing briefs- I've been wearing briefs all my life, and that could've, uh, forced it to be bent downward when it gets... stiff.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> But, Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I dunno! I don't but- I don't know-<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris, have you ever used a penis pump?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A- a- a pump?<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh... Yes, I have. ''(Pause)'' Well, but- but my- My penis was already bent downward BEFORE I used the pump. It was already bent downward.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> What about the Viagra?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I never took Viagra.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> You told me you did, didn't you?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I took- For the record, I did not take Viagra, I took Extenze.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Oh right, right.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> And my- My... dick was bent downward before I took that as well.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Oh. Can I ask you a question about that?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, sure.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Did you take Extenze and use a penis pump so you could try and impress women, maybe?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, did you say if I could- Are you asking me if I could do that?<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> No, why did you use the pump and the Extenze?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, I did not do it the same time, for your- for your information.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I know but why would you use them at all?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I felt like my dick could be longer. <br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> ''(Pause)'' Oh, alright. I'm just asking, I'm sorry.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's okay.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Yeah, those don't actually work, they can actually cause damage to your penis.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What, the pump?<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Yes.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Yes, and also most women do not care about like...<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Hold on.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, for the record, mine does grow up to a maxium of seven inches.<br />
<br>''[People talking over each other, somebody asks about measuring]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm... Well-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> You could use a tape measure.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I used a- I used a ruler. You know I- <br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I based it against the uh, bent part. Make it straight. So, it does go a maxium of seven inches in length.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Yeah my dad was a doctor, he always told me to stay away from those things.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well anyway, you know, that measurement was- That measurement was made AFTER the, uh... Extenze. ''(Pause)'' You know, before and after- Before it was like five to six inches. <br />
<br />
===Dating Education (1:28:30- 1:38:48)===<br />
<font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Okay, um... ''(Awkward silence)''<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Hey Chris, I was wondering, where did you get the idea for [[Dating Education]]?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> The idea for Dating Education... Okay, basically in High School we have ''Sexual'' Education, and it's like, well it's fine for... when you get that far in the dating situation, but how to we get to the first date, period. That's the idea-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 3:'''</font> Uh, excuse me Chris, but I think the whole point of Sex Ed is more out of, um... cautioninary, you know, telling the kids to take caution and-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 3:'''</font> -it's not exactly an instructor, it's more or less just telling them-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, yeah, I- I understand that. And, uh... I understand that, I took a Sex Ed class when I was in High School, so I unders- I do have [[Chris and sex|a great understanding]] of that. I'm just saying, how do we... get to the first date, period, that's why, Dating Education, I feel is required. It's-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Well most people- The thing is, most people can handle their own pre-date blindness, I think it's just your Autism kind of prevents you from-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Plus, you-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Hold on, let me talk.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Look, let me just, look, well one thing. ''This guy'' is blaming my Autism.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> No, no, no, look, I'm studying psychology, I know this stuff. Um, it makes it hard for you to interpret social cues, so...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, exactly, Dating Education is for people like that. Could be for people like that to-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> You could actually go to therapy, and they can teach you this stuff.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, they should teach it- They should teach it like in uh... In the High Schools-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> That seems kinda like it would be a waste of school funds.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, not necessarily!<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> I'm just saying for normal- Normally for people, dating comes easily for them.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah well there are- There's-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Wait, wait, don't talk over him.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> There are a lot of people who still are very shy to even approach... women, and there are even shy people who are afraid to approach men. I-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Well, I think that has to do more with personal shyness, I mean you have to get over that eventually. That is very-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but still, Dating Education classes will- Will allow... Would teach, uh... The uh, shy people, uh... Good things to say and do.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Well, they already have Psycho Therapy.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> And also-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Psycho Therapy.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It has nothing to do with therapy. It's like... You teach them to-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 3:'''</font> How isn't it like therapy?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You teach- Therapy is like, only one person, in one room, you-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> No, they have group therapy too.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> Yeah, I took group therapy for my depression, and it helped me.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> I have something called Social Anxiety Disorder, I was really shy, I couldn't talk to anyone, so I went to group therapy, and I learned all about dates and stuff.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 3:'''</font> Hold up, uh, Chris- I don't know if you're reading the left or not, but YouTubeLover is actually saying that shy people aren't retarded, ''[something]'' YouTubeLover is saying.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Ummm... For the record, I'm not- I'm not [[slow in the mind]]. And also, The R-Word is offensive to me.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 3:'''</font> I'm sorry, that's just what YouTubeLover said.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> "The R-Word"?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> "Retarded".<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It questions the mental capabilities.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Chris, this is not what I'm talking about at all, you're just taking what I'm saying and trying to completely derail it.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> I know what you're talking about.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 3:'''</font> Maybe you need a class on how to get friends.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> See, what I'm saying is this is all, um... Making friends and stuff, this is all... It's not really stuff you can teach, it's just...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but... Dating Education class would teach you, like, would recommend... suggest things you could say and do.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> But it isn't really a proven method, Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 3:'''</font> Chris, let me- Here's the situation, you remember when you were in the PokeLeague?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 3:'''</font> Yes. Did you have friends there? I mean, that's what friends are, friends are people that you can relate to, they are... people that share-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I had- I had acquaintances- I had... friends AND acquaintances.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 3:'''</font> Well, it- I mean, you like to put things into categories and, y'know, you'd consider people that have a similar interest in things with you as friends, because you know, you talk to them about things, and you share ideas.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 3:'''</font> I mean, we're all just trying to help you, Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Right.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> What I'm trying to say is, dating basically comes down to social skills. You can't teach social skills as something that- You can get therapy for it, I mean it's not really something you can teach.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It can be taught though.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 2:'''</font> No it can't. <br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 4:'''</font> There are like, dating coaches, Chris, have you ever thought of seeing a dating coach or someone like that?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> Those are baloney.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Sounds like baloney.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 3:'''</font> ..You know, you kind of-<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 1:'''</font> Well anyway, what I was saying, is... forget it now.<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy 3:'''</font> Well, as I was saying, you... You don't really learn, you kind of, you know... Get to know somebody, um... It usually starts on how they... It usually starts with similar interests-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, hang on, hang on. Stop for a moment. Hey. YouTubeLover, I've played video games, my mind gets- I have developed quick-minded skills from that, so therefore... I can make- I can make decisions on the fly like THAT. ''(Pause)'' Yeah but still, that still proves that I'm not slow. 'Cause I can make decisions- <br />
<br>''[Audio is messed up for a while, Chris is still talking about how he's not slow and has many friends]''<br />
<br><font color="#000000">'''Guy:'''</font> It sounds like you're getting "acquaintances" and "friends" messed up, the people at Church are acquaintances, and kind of have to be with you, friends are the people that would ask, after Church, "Hey, let's go get something to eat" or "Hey, did you hear about this movie coming out?" and then you go see a movie with them.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay, I'm getting tired of answering questions right now, but.. ''[Audio still messed up. Chris and the others keep talking back and forth for a while. Sarah May returns and they start talking, eventually the audio goes back to normal]''<br />
<br />
===Chris shatters Sarah May's heart (1:38:48 - 1:56:55)===<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sarah, you are my friend.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I don't know, because it doesn't always feel like that, you know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmmm... I get- I get under stress sometimes, it's hard for me to... think... about every single detail.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I sensing that, like, you just wanna use me for sex, you-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, no, no, no, no, no, no, I want- I- I am your friend, and I wish to... Sarah, you are my friend. And I love you as such. Okay?<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I guess, I... kind of feel like crying...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No you don't have- Don't cry. Don't cry. I'm sorry. <br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I'm just a little upset that ''[something]'' then we'd have a threesome and like-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Oh, oh, oh, that. Yeah. Hmmm... Yeah. I'm sorry about that. It- Uh... My mind was- was in one- was... Uh... Had my mind in another location, and uh, just... didn't want me to think, past... clearly. I'm sorry.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> You mean like, in a sexual place, you know, like thinking about that?<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Actually, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No I- No no no, not in a sexual place, no.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Okay...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I was like, uh... Hm, uh... some- yeah. Hm. Anyway, I'm sorry, Sarah.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Um, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, Julie?<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Because of my, uh, recent religious studies, I don't really think... Chris, I don't really want you to have sex with another woman.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I'd be having the sex with you FIRST.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> No, that's... That's not what I mean, it's more the... I don't want you to have sex with another woman.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''(Sigh)'' Well that's like, you're- you're- you're, uh... Now you're saying it's like, uh... Another-<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> And I'm not gonna have sex with other men either, so...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But, you know, Julie I was-<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> The Bible states that sex should only be after marriage and with one person, your soulmate.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, well... Yes. Julie. But, you know, from what I was taught in my Methodist Church, sex before marriage IS okay. As long as we love each other. Very much, Julie. And I love you.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris, I do truly love you, but... It's love, and it's something you should just share with me, you know.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, that's right, I will be shining for you first, for a whole bunch- For a whole bunch of number of times, and than if we want- and then if we- Then- If and when we feel ready, with Sarah, who is our, uh... Who is our friend.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> It's God's will that you went to a Methodist Church. Which is the same is mine.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Wait a minute, I thought you said that you didn't go to Church.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> No I mean, I went to a Methodist Church and it's the same as yours- No, I mean- What I'm trying to say is, what I'm TRYING to say is that I don't want you having sex with other women. I'm just trying- Chris...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Julie. I understand. And I'll respect your wishes. I will keep myself- I will save myself sexually for you.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'm sorry, I'm just nervous.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's okay. It's okay, I understand. ''(Pause)'' I'm hugging you, Julie. Do you feel that?<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes. You promise me you won't have sex with other women?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Un- Unless I had your consent, I promise I will not have sex with other women.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> But... But, Chris, you promised.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well... Yeah, I promised, uh... You'd be the first- You would be in- You would be- You would be in our threesome, and uh... <br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> But... But Julie just said she didn't want you to... You know...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, she didn't want me to have... sex with other women, uh... Julie, uh, you wanna answer this queston? Because I'm not sure I'm able to, myself.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes, I will answer it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> So what's the question?<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Um, I was just wondering because... Chris promised me before that he would have a threesome with me, and now you don't him to, and... I'm really upset right now, is all.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Well yes, but you must understand where I'm coming from, I mean, I'm sure if you had a husband, you actually wouldn't want him having sex with other men.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Well, I- I understand, because I'd want to keep my man to myself to, but it's just... He promised, I don't know what kind of person goes back on their promises.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'm sorry, Sarah May, but this is my decision.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I understand, but... I just feel really... The promise you made to me was just really special and sacred, you know? I just want to know that we're good friends, you know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I meant the promise as sacred between me and Sarah May, as friends, and such. And, uh, Julie, just to let you know, I would be- I would be okay- You would have my consent if you wanted to, uh, have sex with the other man, that's why I had given- That's why I gave it consideration, and uh... Feel that I'd be cool. With uh, you having, uh... With you and me having a with- With another- With the guy, with the second guy in there.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> The Bible is the Word of God. Not your Church. I love you. I love you with my heart, Chris, but please... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I understand, Julie. I understand. And I respect... you for that.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I think it's okay in the Bible if it's sex with someone you truly love.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. You're right- You are correct, Sarah. It is. Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> It's the WORD OF GOD. Not your Church.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but the Church enforces, uh... The rules in the Bible. A guidelines for like, how we should... live our lives. Recommendations.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> It's God's Will. And I think that it would be against God's Will if we decide to do it with another man or woman.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmmm. I understand, yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Now please, Chris. Promise me that you won't have sex with another woman that's not me.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Julie, I promise, I will not have sex with another woman that's other than you.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> But you promised me first! Doesn't that matter to you?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Yes, Sarah, it does matter to me. And I'm sorry. I just-<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> But-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I didn't realize that Julie would feel this way. I wish you-<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Well-<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'm sorry, Sarah May.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Doesn't it matter the way I feel?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It does matter, Sarah. I feel for you. I truly do.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I don't think you do, Chris! I doesn't feel like you do.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I do, cuz it- 'Cause right now, it might feel like, uh... You're being... You're being set- It might feel like you're possibly being set out- Set aside, like an outsider, but-<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> It feels like that because that's what is happening, I mean there's no other word for it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Wait a minute, Chris. Chris, when you talk about how you promised her first... Who else have you promised sex to?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Ohhhhh... Uhhhh....<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Chris, a promise is a sacred thing, and I just don't understand why you would promise me and then break it, and then promise Julie, how does she know it's true?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''(Sigh)''<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Because he truly loves me.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> But I thought you loved me!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Alright, I-<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Chris, you- You can't have it both ways, you know. I don't understand why you-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sarah. Sarah.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Yes?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Don't be upset. I'm sorry, I made the uh, promise... with a- with an assumption that I was uncertain of on, uh, Julie's behalf. And Sarah, I love you and care about and respect you as a friend. And I'm sorry I made a promise I could not keep.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> But, I don't know if I can trust you now. I mean, I was gonna go to Virginia and everything, and now it's... Now I don't think I should.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sarah, you are welcome to come and visit. But as I just have promised Julie... No sex. But we can still hang out together. Is that okay, Julie?<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Just hanging out. Me and Sarah May.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Well that's alright. But if I catch word, Chris, that you did commit adultery with Sarah May I will be very upset.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I swear, I will not, uh... have sex with Sarah May. Sarah, you-<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> ''(Crying)'' It's not fair, Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry. I'm sorry.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> It's not fair, why would you do this to me??<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I didn't know back then!! I'm sorry.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I... I feel so broken right now.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I feel s- I feel sad about it too. That I- That, uh... I can't keep the promise. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. ''(Pause)'' I feel for you, I truly do, Sarah. As a friend, I feel for you.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> How could you feel for me, 'cause... This is never happened to you, no one's ever broken your heart like this.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> My heart HAS been broken before. ''(Sigh)'' Between Mary Lee Walsh, uh... Tellin' me not to search for my sw- Search for sweetheart the way I did back then. And then also that one time... That I actually drew in the- drew as a Sub-Episode. Hanna. She was just pulling my leg back then.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Chris, what are you talking about?!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm just giving you a couple of examples of when my heart WAS actually broken.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> But- But why? We're talking about me right now, I thought. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay, yeah, we are talking about you right now. ''(Sigh)''<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I don't think you care about me anymore...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I- I DO care about you, Sarah May. I care about you very much, as a friend. Okay?<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I have heard that it was said, "You shall not commit adultery, but I say to you, that anyone who looks at a woman to lust for her, has committed adultery in his heart." Do you understand what I'm saying?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Yes, Julie. And you know, Julie, I'll tell- I'll tell you something. Uh... I'm not, I uh, I'm not uh... I'm still holding on to my- to the, uh... feelings that I was feeling when I was talking to you, Sarah, but, you know, just, uh... I'm holding on that, but I'm talking to Julie right now. And Julie, I wanna say, I'm proud of you for, uh, taking such an interest in the Methodist Church.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Thank you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I'm religious too, I just... Am I wrong? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, you-<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Am I wrong about what I believe?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, Sarah. You are not wrong. You are right. You are right in what you believe, yourself.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> But how can both me and Julie be right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''(Sigh)'' Because, to... each of you, from your own point of view, what you see is right. <br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> But Chris, why are you listening to what Julie says about religion? Why aren't you listening to me?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, uh... I- I will listen to you, Sarah, umm... If you have anything you'd like to say, I'm... open and I will listen to your impressions and assumptions. ''(Long pause)''<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Well... I mean, I'm Jewish, is that okay?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, you're Jewish.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did not- I did not know that. But, yes, that's okay, '''Julie'''. You are Jewish-<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I was really afraid that you would... be upset with me.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No it's okay, I'm not upset with you. I'm not upset with you, '''Julie'''. And I accept the fact that you are Jewish. And I accept- And I still accept you... as my friend. And also, uh, I may offer a input, if I heard correctly, uh... Uh, people who are Jewish are not supposed to have sex outside their religion.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Yes, some people believe that, but not all of them.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Do you believe it?<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Some of us don't believe in it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Do you believe in it?<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Yeah, I think as long as the people love each other, then it's okay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Well then, '''Julie''', you are right.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I mean, I respect Julie's opinions and all, but, you know, I just... I think in any religion that a promise should be a sacred thing, you know.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, '''Julie''', I agree. Promises are sacred.<br />
<br>''(In case you lost count, Chris called her by the wrong name FOUR times in a row.)''<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> That was me, not Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''(Not understanding)'' Yes. I am listening.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Why are you calling me "Julie", Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I- I did not call you "Julie".<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Wait... No, I said "Yes-" ''(Finally realizes)'' Oh, I'm sorry. My mind is-<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> You- Are you just pretending that I'm Julie?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, no, no! No, Sarah. No. I'm not-<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> ''(Crying)'' Why would you do that to me?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It was an accident!<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> WHY???<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> How could you make a stupid accident like that, Chris??<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm not perfect, we're not perfect! ''(Sigh)'' We're only- We're only human. We have our- We have rights to make mistakes. And I have made mistakes.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> It's just like, when you're having sex with somebody and they say somebody else's name, do you know what that would feel like? Do you know what this is doing to me right now, Chris??<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I- Sarah. I do understand. Because I have... seen that situation on television.<br />
<br>''[Once again, the audio is fucked. Chris and Sarah May are talking. Sarah says something about killing herself and Chris yells at her not to do it. Someone laughs, presumably the person who is recording the chat. The audio returns to normal for a few seconds.]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[something]'' -it was just now!<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> ''(Crying)'' I'm sorry, you know I-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> NOOOOOOOO, I'm sorry- <br />
<br>''[Audio cuts out again for a short while]''<br />
<br />
===Put the knife down, I sent you a lock of my hair! (1:56:55 - 2:01:42)===<br />
<font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I can't believe this!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''(Sigh)'' I can't believe it either.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> You- You won't even say anything, you just told me you don't ''[something]'' ...You don't even care about me!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sarah, I do care about you!<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> You just wanna talk to Julie right now, don't you?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm talk- No. I wanna talk to you, I want to... help you feel better, Sarah.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> You're not even trying...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am trying, Sarah. I'm sorry. I messed up, and I feel bad about it too.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> But you KEEP messing up! You just- you keep doing it! I... I think I'm gonna do something really bad...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> NO, SARAH, DON'T! Don't do- Don't do anything bad! Don't, no. No. Don't hurt yourself, Sarah.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Chris... I think I'm going to.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> NO, NO, NO, don't do that, you've got a lot to live for, Sarah.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I feel like- I feel like killing myself, or-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, Sarah, don't!<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I'm gonna kill myself...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No! No, no. No. No. Sarah? Don't kill yourself. Don't kill yourself.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I just- I feel like nothing is worth living for anymore, because-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sarah! Sarah, there are a lot of things in life worth living for.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> There nothing, if your friend can't even keep a promise and doesn't even know your name...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I do know your name, your name is Sarah.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> You don't- You don't know my name... You don't.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Your name is- You are SARAH MAY.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Then why do you keep calling me "Julie"?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am not- I stopped. I stopped doing that.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> You did it like five times!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, Sarah. Look, ''(Sigh)'' well maybe I miscounted.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I'm killing myself right now...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> NO, NO, DON'T- No! No! No! No-<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I've got the blade, you can't stop me!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, Sarah- Sarah, put the knife down.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I'm doing it!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No- No, Sarah! No.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I'm doing it right now!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. Look, stop. Stop. Just, just stop.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> ''(Crying)''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Put the knife down, Sarah.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> ''(Crying, in pain)''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Put the knife down, Sarah. You don't need to do this. You've got- You have a lot to live for, Sarah. Sarah, you have a lot to live for. You have your-<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> You just keep saying the same thing, you-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You have your family! You have your friends! You have your future! And also, I- Also, Sarah. I sent Cassie 23 samples of my locks of hair.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Why are you telling me this?? Why???<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Because, uh, I know- I know... from Cassie's promise, she will send you one of those locks.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> But that doesn't matter right now, why are you talking about this??<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''(Sigh, whiny)'' Sarah, I'm trying to make you feel better. I'm trying- I'm trying to help you.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> You... You... ''(Crying)''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sarah... I'm sorry.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I'm gonna...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sarah, no, don't cut yourself any more.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I- I thought you understood us, I... I thought you understood the girls, you said you did...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I- I- I did understand... women. Well, maybe not- Maybe not to a full amount of knowledge, but I CARE, and I RESPECT all women's feelings, including yours, Sarah.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Then why did you lie to me? You lied to all of us, when you say you-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''(Sigh)''<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> You say you respect us, and I... You have to stop lying, Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sarah, I'm not lying now. ''(Sigh)''<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> How do I know that? You tell me you weren't lying before, and then you turn around and you... I... I don't- I have to...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''(Sigh)''<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I have to go.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, Sarah, Sarah. I was ready-<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I have to go, I have to go now, I can't take this anymore...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sarah.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I can't take this anymore...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sarah? I love you-<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I'm leaving right now, I can't-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, Sarah.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> I can't take it...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sarah? I'll give you- I'll give you your space. You just calm- Just take your time. Just calm down.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> ''(Crying)''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Don't cut or kill yourself.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> ''(Crying)''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, don't- Don't cut or kill yourself.<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Well, I'm gonna do it right now.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No-<br />
<br><font color="#FF0000">'''Sarah May:'''</font> Goodbye, Chris... Goodbye.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sarah? I love you as a friend! ''(She's gone)'' Oh...<br />
<br />
===The Five Stages of Grief (2:01:42 - END)===<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris? I'm sorry, Chris... I'm sorry.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, this is my fault.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> This... I'm sorry.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''(Sigh)'' I'm sorry too, Julie. I did- I made a promise I did not realize that I couldn't keep. And now I just made... things worse. I... Thought- At least- At least two or five times I said your name instead of Sarah's.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris, it's okay. We'll get throught this together, don't worry.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Y'know, Julie, it took me a long time- took me a long time to make the transition from... um, [[PandaHalo|Sarah/Panda]] to your- to you. 'Cause y'know, back then I... My- The first name that came into mind was- was hers, but... Still, I tried- Still, I worked HARD in shifting from that- from her to you. To devote myself to you. I- I do- Julie? I love you and a care about you a lot as a friend, and as my... girlfriend.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Sarah May may be gone, but I...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well at least I still have you.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Thank you. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''(Breathing)''<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> But, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'm still worried, she's probably dead I'm... worried about her. I... Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I'm worried too.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I need to go and think. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, me too.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> For a while...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Me too.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I might not be back for a week.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I understand. Julie? I'm still looking forward to your letter, and I'll look forward to the next time we chat. And... ''Ich bin schwell'', Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I think, at this time, maybe you should talk to [[Clyde]].<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. I un- I understand. We should talk to Clyde. If the home- If my home phone rings in the future, I'll be sure to answer it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> No, I think we should talk to him on Skype.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Well, okay, let's... We can switch over to Skype then. Alright.<br />
<br>''[The end. Bluespike sings and everyone in the chat is amazed by what just transpired.]<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 7|Mumble Chat 7]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 9|Mumble Chat 9]]|}}<br />
<br />
==Links==<br />
* [https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBaWhzZ1NLXzF0dFE Download]<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_7&diff=163153Mumble 72012-10-05T20:46:51Z<p>Irisviel: </p>
<hr />
<div>'''Mumble 7''' is the seventh of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]], held on 13 [[February 2009]].<br />
<br />
Appears to be the genesis for the "Power" videos in which Chris attempts and fails to prove his [[I AM STRONG|strength]] and [[CWC Fighter|fighting]] [[Challenge For Clyde|skill]], though these would not materialize for several months.<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
* A fan talks to Chris about putting naked posters of girls and pictures of men up in his room up to find out if his friend was a [[homo]] as Chris suggested. He tells Chris that his girlfriend dumped him over the posters and his friend ignored all of them. Chris sees nothing wrong with his advice until Julie tells him that she wouldn't like that. Chris recommends sending an anonymous letter explaining the situation and utterly fails to apologize or show concern.<br />
* Fans point out that Chris shouldn't have to show and prove that he is straight.<br />
* Chris cuts a fan off to let Julie ask a question involving [[pedofork|shota]].<br />
* Fans ask Chris to turn his radio down.<br />
* Chris uses Wal-Mart printer paper & RSVP ballpoint pen to draw, and a 50-pack of Crayola markers to color. Refuses to use color pencils or Photoshop to color, saying he prefers the markers.<br />
* Chris talks about Omicron's redone version of [[Sonichu]], accusing him of plagiarism. Says that the difference between what Omicron is doing and what he is doing is that Sonichu is his. Agrees to let Omicron continue if he credits Chris with the copyright.<br />
* '''Julie is convincing Chris to make videos proving to Clyde how strong he is.''' Chris feels that the [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|dildo breaking video]] proved this. Fans say that Chris's dildo comes apart naturally for cleaning.<br />
* '''A fan recommends making a video showing off his fighting moves to scare Clyde.'''<br />
* Chris is asked why he would use a dildo in proving that he is straight. Chris says that he is straight for crushing it, fans call him a [[homo]] for keeping it.<br />
* Chris [[lie|denies]] [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|using the dildo]], and claims that it's now broken. Fan says it could easily be reassembled. Chris is adamant that it was glued and that it took a lot of strength to pull it apart.<br />
* When asked by Julie, '''Chris admits using super-shears from Cutco to break the dildo glue, claiming to use a lot of strength in the process'''.<br />
* Fans discuss [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]]. Chris insists that it was drawn in protest of [[ED]]. He says it was anonymous, as most women have long brown hair and her eyes were censored.<br />
* Insists that [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:AngelicainGod%27sEyes.JPG the Rule 34 of Angelica Rosechu] is masturbating and enjoying it, and is using her hand to do it.<br />
* Chris thinks Billy Mays is on Home Improvement.<br />
* Chris isn't doing anything on Valentine's Day, as Julie is not there yet.<br />
* Chris discusses the the No-Redheads policy in his [[Love Quest]]. Says that redheads don't attract him unless they are not natural redheads. No piercings or tattoos allowed.<br />
* Chris is OK with blue hair.<br />
* Does a terrible Marge Simpson impersonation.<br />
* Chris impersonates Comic Book Guy and Donald Duck.<br />
* A fan presents the possibility that AIDS was sent by God to kill the [[homos]].<br />
* [[Chris and Religion|Premarital sex being forbidden in Christianity]] is discussed. Chris fumbles for an explanation.<br />
* '''A fan pretending to be black says he believes the government made AIDS to get rid of black people. Chris says that that's the kind of thing a black guy would say'''.<br />
* Premarital sex comes up again. Chris compares it to using porn to practice and learn skills for later.<br />
* The fake black fan calls Chris on his comment from earlier about black guys and AIDS. He makes the excuse that someone else said it first.<br />
* Questions on Sonichu start. Sonichu doesn't wear clothes because it's a comic. Chris isn't sure how [[Blake]] sounds. He might sound black, he might sound like Shadow the Hedgehog. The fake black fan asks why the bad guy has to be black, also mentioning [[Silvana]]. Chris says that he doesn't have to be.<br />
* Chris gets annoyed about the pronunciation of [[Rosechu]] as popularized by the Old Narrator of the [[Audiobooks]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't disagree that the Audiobooks made Sonichu more popular that he ever did'''.<br />
* He doesn't mind fanfics that don't portray Sonichu in a bad light.<br />
* The audio goes low in the main chat and a fan has a private, unrelated conversation for a few minutes.<br />
* Audio comes back as Chris is admitting that the [[B-Manajerk]] was black in real life.<br />
* Chris doesn't watch the news, so doesn't have an opinion on [[Barack Obama|Obama]]. He voted for him because he saw a documentary where he saw more of himself in Obama, namely that he was an outcast at one point.<br />
* A fan says that you should vote based on politics, not personality. Chris says that he is a moderate.<br />
* Chris doesn't know what the financial bailout is. He says that he drew the [[Sonichu 8#The Elevator Gags|racist picture]] of Obama based on his father's joke, before he saw the documentaries that made him vote.<br />
* Chris will not agree or disagree with interracial dating/marriage. He would want a white woman, but he would be [[gal pals|friends]] with others.<br />
* He'd marry an Asian.<br />
* It's not yet known if Silvana will be a good guy or if she will lose her [[pickle|dick]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't know what he wanted to be when he was younger, he's just making it up as he goes along'''.<br />
* '''Chris is keeping the name changes in the comics for legal reasons'''.<br />
* A fan suggests Slaweel cursing Rosechu to have a dick. Chris gets upset before saying that he'll think about it. The fans think it's a great idea. One considers a talking penis for Rosechu. Chris says it's a stupid idea.<br />
* Another fan asks about Chris being sacked from Wendy's. He denies scaring the child with his Donald Duck impersonation, saying that he didn't make him cry.<br />
* Chris might release his DVD one day.<br />
* A fan says that Chris has influenced underground rappers such as Immortal Technique, who has sampled him.<br />
* Chris takes requests. Impersonates MC Hammer, Dr Nick Riviera, Peter from [[Family Guy]], Mario and Sonic, butchering them all and tainting our childhood memories.<br />
* More Sonichu questions. '''Chris won't upload [[Zapina]] [[Rule 34]] because she is underage and Chris is worried about legal ramifications'''. When he is reassured that this would be legal, he says he would consider it. He will also consider Sonichu-Rosechu anal sex. Rosechu would not clean the [[pickle]] with her mouth, she would clean it off with a washcloth. He would not sell the the washcloth on EBay.<br />
* Chris calls a stop to the potty humor displayed throughout the Sonichu questions.<br />
* '''Chris denies that [[Yawning Squirtle]] is a character'''.<br />
* Fans ask for a joke. He recites a dreadful rhyme about Videogame consoles. He then tells his awful [[Christian's sex joke|sex joke]]. Fans start to tell racist jokes about [[niggos|black people]] and Mexicans. Chris calls for a stop to this.<br />
* A fan says that his friend [[mass debating|masturbated]] to the [[rule 34|adult section of Sonichu]] and is now worried that his friend is a [[homo]], as they were drawn by a man. '''Chris says that this is what he intended it for''', and they are drawings of women, so his friend is straight. He doesn't masturbate to his own drawings.<br />
* Chris reassures a fan that [[Mass Debating|masturbating]] in the same room as another man isn't gay as long as both men are thinking of women, but he would not do this.<br />
* Chris offers no comment as to what constitutes adultery.<br />
* Chris says that he is patriotic. Asked to sing the national anthem, he instead mangles a few lines of "My Country, 'Tis of Thee". He then tells a 'patriotic' joke that is insensitive to Mexicans. [[Chris and Hypocrisy|The fans call him on his "no more racist jokes" statement from earlier]].<br />
* Chris does a poor impersonation of Mr T.<br />
* Chris says that if you are married, sleeping with someone else isn't cheating if you have consent from your spouse.<br />
* Chris gives more advice on homos and recommends Axe body spray for attracting girls.<br />
* Chris has not met any celebrities, only local DJs.<br />
* Does impersonations of Homer Simpson and Bender. The two sound identical.<br />
* Chris gives dating advice: Stay calm, polite, friendly and don't let your nerves get the best of you. Say "Hello, how are you" and talk about yourself. '''[[Barbara|His mom]] told him that standing around with a sign makes him look retarded. A female fan cracks up laughing and can't stop'''.<br />
* "Those who can't, teach"<br />
* Chris says he has never even been on a date. Rejects dating suggestions from fans.<br />
* '''Chris was close with Sarah "[[PandaHalo]]" McKenzie, but hasn't heard from her in over two weeks. He heard about the fires and doesn't know if she's still alive. When a fan adds that 108 people were killed in the fires, Chris responds to the entire ordeal with [[Chris and death|"It's OK though, at least I have a good woman who's willing to be by my side at this point"]]'''.<br />
* When pushed, he says he feels remorse for the the victims of the fires and is concerned that [[Sarah Cassandra McKenzie|Panda]] is dead.<br />
* He asserts that he didn't abandon Sarah for [[Julie]].<br />
* '''A fan says that if [[PandaHalo|Sarah]] isn't alive, Chris should take solace that her perfectly barbecued remains fed the survivors. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|SHUT UP!!!]]'''<br />
* Chris says that he cares about Sarah and Julie equally and wouldn't dump Julie as a friend. A fan asks what he will do to the survivors who ate Sarah. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|"SHUT UP!!!"]] and demands that he be booted.<br />
* Fans reassure Chris that Sarah is probably OK.<br />
* Chris does abominable impersonations of Uncle Ruckus from The Boondocks and Hank Hill. '''He sings "Don't Trust Them New [[Niggos|Niggas]] Over There"'''. He also impersonates Meowth and sings the Team Rocket song.<br />
* [[Clyde]] enters. Chris refuses to answer questions and leaves.<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
===Chris proves he is straight===<br />
'''Guy:''' Chris!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all! ''[echoes]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'll be damned.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh, Chris-[gets cut off by another guy]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh you know, can't com- it's uh, can't complain.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' How's construction of the site?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' [unintelligible] so Chris<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I...I need to ask you something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yup?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh... I put those posters, of the... Playboy and everything in my room, and uh, one of my girlfriends saw it, and she got mad at me for looking at other w-... other girls, and she broke up with me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh... I'm sorry to hear that. It could-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, she's calling me a pervert. I-I don't understand this.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Did you... did you ex- did you try to explain to her about situation between you and that guy?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I... I did, and I don't think she understood.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... well, you should try, you should, uh, s-... try, uh, you should try wr-, you should tr-, uh, do you know her email address?<br /><br />
[pause]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So, uh Chris-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' A-also, wait... also, uh, the friend, I was talking about, he, uh, visited, and [typing noises] he, uh, he went into my room, and didn't even notice the posters. He just s-sat in the middle, he didn't s...sit in any uh, part of the room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Huh. Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, uh... so, yeah, I don't know. I mean, my girlfriend broke up with me, called me a pervert, said that I shouldn't be looking at other girls, I mean... I don't know what to do now.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well listen, uh, answer my question, do you have her email address?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Umm... yeah, but she won't... she won't answer me anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm... ok, hmm. Here's what you can do, uh... Do you know your girlfriend's... any of your girlfriend's [[Gal pal|gal-pals]]?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm... well, you should try to... like wr- you should write out... hmm... hmm... here's an idea. S- Write a letter to her and send it via smail mai-, via snail mail, but don't write the return address. On it.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What should I write?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just like, you know, like, they, you know, this is... you know, this is... you, uh, you put your name there, and you, it's, and then you would basically explain the situation between you and that guy, and that's why you had the posters up, well that's why you put the posters up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't really understand what was the point of the posters in the first place?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[sigh]'' it's... ''[sigh]'' if he looks at... if he, if he is very interested, if he is, if he was straight, he would uh, look at the women. Very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But he didn't even notice them. He didn't notice any of the posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, then I guess he is a [[Homos|homo]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' W...well, um, he wasn't looking at anything, not even the guy posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Hmm... He's not blind, surely.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, like, what is he, is he like, uh...I don't know.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I don't know either, man. But, you know at the moment I would suggest you, uh, write the- write the letter to your girlfriend, send the mail, don't write your return address on the envelope, and, uh, mail it to her.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Also my mom saw the posters and she got offended, she's like really religious and st- she said that like, uh, you know, lust is a sin or some shit. Oh, like she said, she's like all against the, the uhh, the like, Playboy in my room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, your- apparently your mom hasn't been [beeps] that open minded that time. So, you know, give her time to reh-cover, she'll uh, she might op- she might open up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I don't think that was a good idea though, I mean, w-why did-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -you suggest it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I was trying to see if he, to, I was trying to s-help you figure out if your uh, if your friend was a homo or not.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I know, but, do you have uh, [Fans talking] Playboy posters in your room?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unclear] I'm very forward.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I have uh, poster of some, of uh, I have a poster in my room of uh, some uh, naked girls I got from adamandeve.com as a bonus.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Then, nobody says anything about it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[clears throat]'' Well, I didn't really have too many oppor- too many people in my room. So, it's kind of like in a hard to notice place.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Um, wondering, um, If you showed anyone, wouldn't they be offended?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe, maybe not, [Fan grunts] it just depends on their point of view.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I wouldn't want the same thing that happened to me to happen to you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I hear you there. Uh, just to so just sound clear... Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie, are you there?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ok, uh, would you be offended if you saw such a poster in my room?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''[breaks up]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, What will, what was that? [Echoes]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie'''</span> Yes I would, kind of.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well that's no problem, I can take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, see that's what I'm talking about, I mean...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, that's why I asked Julie right now, because I respect her. So, because she said that she would, I will take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I've been thinking, um...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you have... [unclear] Chris, I don't think you should look at other woman.[sic] In my opinion.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I see, Julie. Well that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I...I respect that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' She might get jealous, I mean, that's what happened to my...my girlfriend.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, that's fine Julie, I respect your, I respect that. Just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey, can I ask you a question? If uh, he's done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, uh, one more thing, um, you know I've been thinking, uh, I don't really think you need, you know, posters and stuff like,<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' to prove you're straight, I mean, if you're straight, that's all there is to it i-if, am I right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think you're right.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I...I mean, you shouldn't have to prove that you're straight.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> You're right.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I m-mean [line breaks temporarily] Y-you shouldn't have to reassure yours-self. You should just be knowing it, and nothing anybody says, should get very, uh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, it's ve-ah-very-but you see, I have like, I have that [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] in my room, it's just, so that like, you know, for in case I have any-for in case I have any random thoughts, on account really, to tempt me.<br /><br />
''[unintelligible mix of chatter from most participants trying to get their word in]''<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I mean, even if they're random thoughts, even if they're random thoughts, if you know you're ''positive'' about it, you shouldn't have to look at anything to make sure.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, usually.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay. Uh, moving on from all this homosexuality, uh, I have one question, uh- [gets cut off by Chris in the background] ...never mind, [fat douchebag?]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey, ah, let Julie ask a question, let Julie ask her question.<br /><br />
<br />
===7:08 Julie asks about shotacon===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, I was watching you on the Internet yesterday and, what's a shotacon?[slightly cut off]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...I'm sorry, uh-y, I'm sorry, you got cut off, what was that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> What's a sho-[cuts off again]-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...What's a...''short''?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Shot-[cuts off third time, pretty obvious she's saying ''shota'']-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dude, shota.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, shota.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ssshhhh...shota?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, S-H-O-A-T-A [sic].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, it's a word he found online.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, [baby?], yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never heard of that word.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I dunno, if you want to look it up, you can probably find out on an online dictionary...<br /><br />
''[pause, and a weary sigh from someone other than Chris]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'll-I'll take a look. Hang on.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I know some Japanese and I think I've heard that somewhere, like in a magazine or something.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, it's some of that Japanese shit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Probably is. Three moments, I'll look it up.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Okay!<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's radio is audible]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Whoops, that was the wrong one. The wrong bookmark.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' S-H-O-T-A.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I know, I just get the wrong bookmark for...place I wi-for like...dictionary-type website that I have.<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's keyboard taps are audible]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uhhh...Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, now that Julie's done with her question, I also had one.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' He has to find what that means first.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, ''I'm sorry''.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Shit, ah shit, I've just found it on Wikipedia. It's, uh, it's a ma-it's a Japanese name. It's a name of a person. In Japan.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Really.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a Japanese name. I think it's-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh no no, I think you're looking at the wrong thing, it's S- S-H-O-T-A-C-O-N.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> S-H- I mean- O-T-A-C-O-N? Shotacon?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's the same thing, just put C-O-N at the end.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I've read it in a dictionary before, can't remember what it means...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, oh! Okay, here it is, uh..."shotacon, sometimes shortened to shota, is Japanese slang of the phrase 'Shotaro Complex'"...uh..."that describes the attraction to young boys or an individual with such an attraction".<br /><br />
''[Disgusted reactions heard]''<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh my god, what the fuck?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' There's lots of sick people. Y'all are gonna get ricked?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Someone from 4 cent garbage came in and told us to look that up, I didn't-I didn't even want to.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess he's a homo...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Don't worry I banned him already.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Um, Chris, Vivian wants to know if you can like, turn your radio down a bit, it's distracting.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yes, please turn it down.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I thought that was quiet enough, here.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, no, the lady'll probably pick it up<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Alright cool. Merci.<br /><br />
<br />
===10:21 Another fan asks about art supplies===<br />
<br />
'''Another Fan:''' Okay, um, I have a question, um, I like to draw—interrupted by mumbling—I like to draw comics and such, I mean I want to start up a webcomic. What kind of materials do you use?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, like, you mean for drawing?<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well mostly I just use like, uh, paper without lines, like, computer printer paper you can get in, like, Wal-Mart, for an inexpensive price in multiples.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then I use like an RES—RSVP-brand pen with the black ink.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh okay, is it like, um, a gel pen or a ballpoint pen or-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like a ballpoint, it's like a ballpoint pen.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What do you use to color?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I use Crayola brand markers.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would like to—I would—I would—I would recommend getting the Super Tip 50-pack which you can also find at the Wal-Mart.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay. I-[interrupted by someone else on chat]<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's basically-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' At Wal-Mart I usually get the 24-color RoseArts. Those are—those do pretty good too.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhh, Vivian, just so you—just so you know, I'm using the microphone that came with Hey You, Pikachu for Nintendo Sisty-Four [sic].<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, yeah no, no offense, but uh, personally I prefer like, colored pencils and shit cause-[Chris mumbling is heard]-they're like easier to erase. Photoshop [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If you want to use colored pencils that's fine, I'm not, uh, saying that you have to use Crayola markers-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why don't you use colored pencils? They're really good, you should try one on like, at least one page, just try one. One page with just colored pencils.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But um, actually, you can—you can scan your drawings and then color—color them in like, Photoshop or something. [rest of chat murmurs in agreement] That looks really professional, and really good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I prefer using the markers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's just that I-I mean—I mean I've tried—I mean I've colored with colored pencils before, and I just feel best with using markers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I have a question, um, uh, the Hey You Pikachu microphone, how does that work on the, you're using that on your computer? Did you say?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah it's just, yeah, it's like you plug it into uh, into the basic microphone jack.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh, yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Excuse me, I have a nice little Plantronics headset.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Hey Chris can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah, hang on a second, uh... uh, Omicron, that's uh, you're basically, uh, you're basically plagiarizing here. You're even using, uh, parts of my original drawings to, uh, make up your so called real ones and, you're just—you're just parroting—you're just plagiarizing-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's dirty and illegal.<br /><br />
[Unintelligible mumbling]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, you said so yourself, you're being illegal. And plus, and plus I'm-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, isn't combining Sonic with Pikachu the same thing?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, but, but but also, look at this, also I'm looking at this site here, it said, he's claiming the copyright for himself, but he's, but he's not. I mean that's like, but he's, he—he says<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' You need to ban him immediately.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, ban him immediately.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh wait wait wait wait wait...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah maybe you should check-[interrupted by loud noise, probably Chris]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well he said that, he's saying that all of Sonichu material is copyrighted by him, when it's clearly not.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah but you use Sonic and Pikachu, and you copyrighted it-<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' He just offered to give you credit-[interrupted by noisy chatter]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean, I put, I mean, yeah but, I mean, I'm talking about the—the Omnicron [sic] guy here, that's like, just put this link here.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh he offered to give you credit-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes that's the same thing you did.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well no no, he, no-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We decided-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No he's plagiarizing MY Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We just decided [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris it's, it's a parody, kinda like Sonichu is.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but he—yeah, but he's saying, he said—he—on his front page he says, all Sonichu material-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah but he's, he just offered to change it, so are you okay with that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> By changing it to Sonichu X-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, he said he'll give you credit instead of claiming it for himself.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, uh, yeah I would appreciate that, that would be better, yeah, if... he changed that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Alright cool.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Problem solved.<br /><br />
<br />
===15:02 Chris talks about dildos to prove his strength===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes Julie.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you think you could tell everyone about my idea? And, since you're going to do it do you think you could tell everyone so they could look out for it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, your idea... um, oh oh oh, yeah, just basically a video of me standing up to Clyde and showing him how strong I am, doin' a few kicks for the camera or something-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, you should throw some punches, show him what you're made of, you know?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Kick, punch, it's all in the mind ''etc.''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I basically... I pretty much did that when I...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Let him talk, c'mon!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I pretty much did - already proved my strength when I... ripped that... ''dildo'' in half.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Foreign-Sounding Guy:''' Most dildos come apart for cleaning.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' C'mon.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but that thing was screwed together at the seam.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok listen to me...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris...<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' Eh Chris!<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ...could you do a like further test of your strength for me?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''stress sigh'' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I wanna see how strong you are please.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...That's fine, I can do that.<br /><br />
'''Other Fan:''' I mean that's ok, you showed your strength, but you should show her your moves. Like show her, like, what kind of moves you can do.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, let me tell you a story about how this'll work, ok.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' See, my, uh, one of my cousins, uh, this guy at school, kept, y'know, picking on him, calling him gay and stuff, and trying to fight with him, and my cousin told him to sss- y'know, one day, the guy said "Hey man, I'm gonna beat you up" and my cousin said "Look, if I show you some of my moves, I'll prove to you I can kick your ass in a fight" and so my cousin, y'know, he stepped back and, he took, uh, he took Taekwondo, and he did a couple moves, y'know? He just stood there for like five minutes just doing his moves, and, y'know, some punches and kicks and... The guy just backed right off; he didn't even want to talk to him any more. So I think that should work.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> All right, well I'll try that. I'll try that.<br/><br />
'''Guy:''' All right. Sounds good.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br?><br />
'''Fan:''' You try- you always mention about how you're straight but yet in your video about you crushing a dildo, uh, doesn't that kinda like, y'know, not help your cause?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, it proves I'm straight because...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' But you have a dildo.<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I got it free with an order on adameve.com<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' But you ''kept'' it and shit. That ain't cool.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' What I don't... Why were there batteries in...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh yeah Chris, why ''were'' there batteries in it? Why did you keep it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I mean...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it wasn't an easy thing for me to sell, right off the bat, or even to make a profit, so...<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In fact in a way it's a good thing I kept it, cause it allowed me to be able to break it, like I did.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes but why would you keep it?<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why would you keep it?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I woulda saved it for my sweetheart, if she'd wanted it. To use it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Aaaahhh.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But if I were there wouldn't you prefer the real deal?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Some things that metal just can't replace.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Yeah.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I heard that.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' You didn't use it did you?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No I did not.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Did you just throw all the ones you had away?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I only had that one. And there you go, I ri- there you go, I broke it apart.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you just, like, ''take'' it apart, I mean, it did...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' ...seem to come apart, like, screwed on...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I did not take it apart, that thing was glued at the seam. I had to put a lot of strength into breaking it at the middle there.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, but I think, um, showing your moves would be better.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Right.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Clyde would mess with you if you show him you can kick his ass.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey, Chris's a muthafuckin' ''gangsta''!<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Blap blap.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yes, Chris will fuck Clyde's shit up.<br /><br />
(awkward pause)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait, Chris, didn't you say you used a - didn't you say you used scissors to break the dildo?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I pretty much did have to so I could break that ''glued seam''.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, I thought you broke it with your hands.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well I- yeah well I would have but it was dang glued at the seam, so I clipped straight in with the scissors I had.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a pair of Super Shears from [[Cutco]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(feigning interest)'' Huh.<br /><br />
<br />
===19:50 Chris defends his Rule 34===<br />
<br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, let's talk about something else. Uh, Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whenever the announcement of the adult Sonichu page, when I looked at your gallery, very nice stuff, you know, I see a picture of what looks like you with a Sonichu, uh, medallion. Like, and, who's that one girl, exactly?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Who, [[Megan]]?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I thought it was, like, [[Crystal]], cause of the hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, it was - it was originally drawn to be Megan but I censored her eyes to, uh, port- to protect her identity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Mmmmmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''(laughing)'' That's stupid! (?) That's so silly.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I drew that after I found the ED page in November.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you say that?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In protest against it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thought you were going to get rid of it anyway.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I tore up the original drawing, I, in- into squares, and I put in in an envelope.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you upload it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you do that shit? Like, and...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I understand Rosechu, but, like y'know, why, like, something that's from real life. That's the problem (?)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's not necessarily from real life, it depends on you inter- it depends on your interpretation, I mean it's hardly- I mean, '''most women have long brown hair, and the eyes are censored''', so...<br/><br />
(laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''Most'' women?!?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I remember in that one video you were saying it was Megan.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because it broke, because it end up, because it the end it broke up my friend - broke up my friendship eve, my uh, friendship with Megan.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um, can I ask you a question? In the third picture, with [[Angelica Rosechu]], what is... what's happening, is... God... doing...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nope. She's masturbating. And she's enjoying it.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But she has no hands there. How's she doing it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' She's ''enjoying'' it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But she does... She does...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah but how's she doing it? She doesn't have her hands there.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> She does have her hands, she's... ''(stress sigh)'' She's... like most women would be able to do the same thing.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thing it's the angle, Julie. I think it's the angle you were looking at it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah plus uh, the picture wasn't, uh, very - wasn't as clear as, like, you know, I would have liked to have had it, uh, I mean, I had that file for a while, and it...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah some of those are kinda blurry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, some deg- some degraded.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ? a good question, have you drawn anything... of... have you drawn anything like that with me? Cause I would actually like to see, if you did. If so, could you, and let me see? I, uh, sorry, that's very rude to ask.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm sorry, let me answer this guy. Yeah, well, I made a retraction video later saying that I- I disowned that address.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ah, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just after that guy hacked into it and changed to it to suck. And as such.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hang on, I'm gonna take a look at that... My Youtube...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I like this song.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What song?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' The song that's playing in the background of, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what do you think of, uh, what do you think of that guy who advertises products, Billy Mays? What do you think of him?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... Billy... Oh! Yeah he's an ok guy, I watched him on Home Improvement.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Billy Mays?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, that was another guy on Home Improvement, Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No that was the same guy. That was the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Really?!? Let's look up. IMDB, go. ''(sound of typing)''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Believe me, it's the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, I really enjoyed your, um, adult, uh, section of the site.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... okey dokey, very good. Aaahh, trying to figure out how to update the link on this thing here. Oh, maybe under here. Oh there it is, thank God (?), update right now.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(singing)'' You spin me right round baby, right round...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (joining in) Like a record baby, right round round round<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's a classic, I can't help in man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There you are, updated. It's finally fixed.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Actually that was Richard Karn on Home Improvement, not Billy Mays.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well my mistake, I mean the guy had the beard and uhh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh yeah I can understand.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And the voice sounds- and the voice sounds the same...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah. They sound the same.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There's a matter of interpretation apparently I misinterpreted so I will admit that I was wrong.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah see we all make mistakes, don't be too hard on yourself.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unintelligible babble or singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you gotten any fan art submissions or notable? For the uh- webpage?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I got one today... It's like mostly a drawing of that uh that uh- of the fan herself.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -got in the snail mail today.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -Sunday.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hmmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What are you doing for this Valentine's day Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhm... I'm sorry, what was that question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What will you be doing this year on Valentine's day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm depends...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ahhh, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm.<br /><br />
Fan: Surely a man of such magnitude as yourself are going to be doing something important, aren't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Magnitude? Way to choose the words buddy.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Vocabulary talent.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, cause I don't have Julie over here yet.<br /><br />
(Reactions of OHs and AHs)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If she was here...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible) -play games.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Or we could just uh... talk.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Ehehehehe. Maybe... uh... why no redheads?<br /><br />
'''Other Woman:''' Yeah?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I was trying to think about that when the other guy asked that question. Uh... I was trying to think up that unh... mmmm... Uhhhh, redheads just don't be very- tract me so much.<br /><br />
Several: Uh, ah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's- it's- a- pi- a possibility that they're dyed.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmmmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But yeah y'know natural redheads enh, yeah, just don't really turn me on as much.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I see...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you thought about girls with um, highlights?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... (pause) aaahhhh... what turns me on hhh- (inhales) (pause) obviously the women.<br /><br />
'''Man:''' Gotta have the women. (?)<br /><br />
'''Guy''': What about piercings or tattoo?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, neither of those.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhhh-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris! How bout like non-orange hair, not like... no, never mind. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... oh... okay... hmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait Chris! How do you feel about blue hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Blue hair's okay, otherwise I wouldna- Otherwise I wouldn't've liked Sailor Mercury.<br /><br />
'''British? guy:''' That is true, she does have blue hair.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' She's a very fine character. There is no way to deny it.<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Blue hair is OFF DA HOOK!!!<br/><br />
<br />
===28:35 Chris impersonates various cartoon characters===<br />
<br />
'''British??? guy:''' Doesn't Marge Simpson have blue hair as well?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (in some kind of insane voice) Oh yeah! Marge Simpson has blue hair and it's as tall as the Empire State building!!!<br /><br />
(Some HMMs UHs and UMs follow)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yo Chris!! Can you do some impersonations for us?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Oh we'd love to hear that!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just did Marge Simpson.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah you're really talented.<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(Several people talking at once)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> -they're really good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Do another SimpsonsChris, how about Comic Book Guy?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Mmmmhmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I'm very indeed. Oh aren't we all promiscuous and whatnot. I like Batman and Robin, oh look! Stan Marsh has come into the thing again - I forget that guy's name, that guy who did the Marvel comics.<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Stan Lee. (Pause) Chris do your Donald Duck impression.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Everybody have fun (incoherent and scary quacking)<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris you should work for Disney.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's good Chris.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Have you ever considered being a voice actor?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Errrrrp... possibly, I'm not sure.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (incoherent, cut off by Chris)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent... another cartoon voice)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris, you're a Christian, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I was just wondering-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahm actu-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -do you just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm actually a Methodist church.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome, I was just wondering: Do you think AIDS was sent by god to kill the homos or do you think that it's just an accident or something man-made?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thou- the thought never occurred to me... thought never occurred to me.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' can you do an impression of Arnold Schwarzenegger?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hold- the question...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Let Chris answer the question.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thought- the thought never occurred to me about what you just said about the AIDS there mmmm... but y'know, it's a possibility and I will not agree nor disagree with it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I was just wondering I mean, I've had that discussion with some of my Christian friends. I just wanted to get your opinion, thank you.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmhhh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think (clears throat) I think Omicron has a point and you did tell me you went to a methodist church didn't you? So that's-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well th- well my Methodist church is uh more loose on- is not as strict on uh- on uh sex.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris I don't know- I don't know that much about religion in the States but I don't think there is a looser Meth- Methodist church. God makes the rules Omicron says.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, hmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well, you know personally I think that the government made AIDS to kill off all the brothers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whoa, whoa... That's what the blacks always say.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. (pause) I'm going to agree, that sounds like something that uh... well, a black guy would say.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So your church is kinda of uh- they let you do- their kinda loose on the whole moral restrictions?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... (pause) uhhh... that's... what's the question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Your church they- you said they're kind of more uh- y'know they're less strict on the whole moral thing, like, as far as sexuality goes? Right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -ah basically.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But y'know, uhh, I thought you're supposed to listen to the Bible or whatever not, y'know, not necessarily- no, never mind.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (interrupts)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, there's also a uh, there's also a- think about this uh, if you uh- if you- if you were a think uh- you have to find for yourself a good meaning behind uh- good meaning behind watching pornography to uh- like teach how it- how to do this and that when you actually get around to doing it...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's all ???<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's all's considered education for yourself.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' How is that realistic at all?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, it's uh- not a really good thing to learn from, trust me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It can be done before marriage as well as long as me and my sweetheart really love each other very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But not in Christianity.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But all I'm saying is y'know, porn is completely, completely unre- unrealistic I mean you can't really learn anything from it.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It gives- it gives you enough ideas.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unclear)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (incoherent) porn.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' When you actually have sex, it's nothing like porn.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe not like you, you not gonna do it-<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' You can't do it immediately- immediately anal sex cause most women are not very happy with anal sex and also...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay, shut up<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' -and also weird-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Shut up.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Yes.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And... that wasn't cool, like...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That was uncalled for...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, like, suthin' a BLACK MAN would say...<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' That's racist man...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, somebody said it on here first before I did.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Does that make it ok?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, I think he's trying to make it clear that- I dunno.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I typically agree with that guy.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So nothing g- it doesn't make it ok.<br /><br />
(incoherent)<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling) I wi- I'm sorry, I take it back.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(unclear)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Guys can we get back to Sonichu, Please?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah this is getting ridiculous.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unclear) -Sonichu actually.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Anyway, my question is that: why does Sonichu not wear clothes while Rosechu and the other Rosechus do wear clothes? And underwear?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Aaaaaaaaaamp... It's like uh- it's basically a cartoon and it doesn't really matter, it's like... mm... think about this: Most cartoon characters wear at least one article of clothing. At least one article. And uh- it's like Yogi Bear who just wears a necktie and a hat.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 35.14)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Other Guy:''' I think it would be cool if all the Sonichus and Rosechus got together and they and- they all formed a big team and they had special uniforms or something, kinda like the X-men.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Or Power Rangers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh yeah, I don't do- I don't do well- I'm not in- no uniforms. It's a uniform and other Sonichus and Rosechus.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'm just wondering if you'd do another impression: What does Blachu sound like? Uh, Black Sonichu? Or Blake?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eeeeuuunh... Eh... ahhhh...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Can you imitate it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... I'm not sure... uhhhhm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Like does he sound black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Possibly, but I'm not certain. I'm not leaning towards it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I'd like to hear it, but if you don't want...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just never- I just never really thought about that. I'd say that he possibly sounds similar to uh, y'know Shadow the hedgehog. But he could possibly sound, black. He could. Don't quote me on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' All right, I was just wondering if you'd do his voice but...<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Hey why does the BAD guy gotta be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never said the bad guy "has to" be black. (pause) I mean, look at the- the range of villanies, I mean there's black and whites and uh... male females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I noticed that uh- Silvana's also... black lookin'.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just decided to color her black because she was born- she came from outer space from a black egg, which was the- which came out of the rainbow.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah, I was also wonderin' about that like-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I- I- I-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' If Silvana came out of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes it's-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Why would she be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' I mean like black ain't part of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like the black sheep of the family. Y'know you put all the colors together and it does become black.<br /><br />
(unintelligible reactions)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -like a brownish-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) is a (unintelligible) color.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Maybe it's because she's from space and there's not a lot of light in space and it's dark or something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah that- a uh yeah- that's one of the-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hmmm.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhm, did you look at the link of my friend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, ummmm...<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Yeah, since you love blue hair.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh- no I haven't looked at it and I don't wanna make Julie feel jealous if I did- if I went and did.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Julie would mind.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhhh...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You look at pornography don't you?<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' (mumble)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, that- that was two syllables "Rose-chu". You don't- don't add- don't say the "e" it's just "Rosechu".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah you went over this last chat.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>(I don't know, it sounds like "narrator")<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sounds like he says "narrator" again)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh... I was just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, well, obviously the uh- the narrator who did those audio books was incorrect. Specially since I never gave that person the approval to do the audiobooks.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think it's just a fan project and I think he-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' and I think he might have one of the West coast dialects. I know that the South they say y'all but over here-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well obviously he lied-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -different. I'd be proud if they made one of my projects into an audiobook though. That means that there are a lot of fans out there that really like it.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Ay.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' They're not selling to try and make any money off it. They're not trying to rip you off. They always made sure- they always narrate the first page by saying "Christian Weston Chandler" so they're not trying to cheat you or anything.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' The people know you're making it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I- I hear that. I just, apparently they misin- misinterpreted the (audio breaks up) name Rosechu. Or mispronounced it. Misinterpreted, mispronounce- fairly the same thing in that situation... possibly. To answer that question... possibly.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uh, Vivian said that the audiobooks made Sonichu way popular that- than you could ever ever do on your own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I will not disagree with the statement. And I appreciate her help.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris. Would you be offended if a fan wrote a fanfiction about Sonichu?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Faaanfiction... if it's- if it's not demeaning or makes them look stupid. Then it's fine- it's fine. (pause) Like I did mind when, shoot, what's his name? That guy... uhhhh... that guy that the uhhhh... did the animations, on his computer.<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' You did mind or you didn't?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Animations???<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think I know what he's talking about. Are you talking about the um...<br /><br />
<br />
(background noise begins)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' Well the original play was a Greek play. Where they're all y'know... Greeks... and crazy stuff happens and they're all runnin' around in togas. So if you ever wanna see the movie "A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum" it was a classic and it had some real classic people from the 50s and 60s in it. Kinda like "It's a MAD MAD MAD MAD World". Sort of a classic old school movie from funny old school world. First color movie type thing. But that'll be a high school play. You'll wanna see that. You might actually enjoy it. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
(inaudible response)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' You never know that might be fun to do. Well I guess that wouldn't work on the weekend then... you gotta...<br /><br />
<br />
'''(FOR THOSE OF YOU WONDERING WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON, IT APPEARS THAT THERE WAS SOME TECHNICAL PROBLEM THAT CAUSED ANOTHER MUMBLE CHANNEL TO BE RECORDED WHILE THE CONVERSATION WITH CHRIS BECAME BARELY AUDIBLE BACKGROUND NOISE. INSTEAD ALL THAT CAN BE HEARD IS SOME BUTTFACE YAMMERING ABOUT FILMS AND TELEVISION SHOWS. I'M NOT GOING TO KEEP TRANSCRIBING IT. CHRIS IS STILL TALKING AND ANSWERING QUESTIONS, BUT NOTHING CAN BE UNDERSTOOD OVER THESE GUYS.)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''(AT 42.56 THE AUDIO SUDDENLY RESUMES NORMALLY)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Unknown person:''' Uh you-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I uh- noticed he's another BLACK villain.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah in real life he was black. Without meaning any offense to the uh- black guy in general, cause you've noticed, among the Jerkops there's uh- we got black's and white's, males and females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(several people jump in at once)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) -you've never drawn a female officer before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well y'know uhhh... uhhh, comic book number 7, near the end. Near the end of the time travel episode. Uhh, I have no opinion about what Obama's doing cause I don't watch the news.<br /><br />
Accented woman: But you voted for him, didn't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes I voted for him because I saw myself in him when I com- when I saw both the documentaries and downloaded them for the Playstation Network between Obama and McCain. I mean voted for a person I saw more of myself of-<br /><br />
Accented woman: You usually vote for someone based on their political leanings, not how you view them. As I were Republican, I voted for John McCain. Not because I liked him but because I- he had the same political views as me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basi- basically I'm a moderate.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh, I see. Um, I was wondering. I was reading opinions: do you agree with his financial bailouts?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm, I don't even know what it is. So I can't disagree or agree.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Well, to make it short um, it's about uh- the government- President Obama is planning to uh- a new one- (cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You got cut off there.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uhh, ok, we lost him.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yo, Chris, uh, do you, you didn't just vote for Obama cause he was black, did you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I did not vote for him because he was black. I voted for him cause I saw myse- because I saw myself in him. In like, similar lifestyles. And I saw that he was a good man, I mean after all, com- I saw- I saw I watched both of the A&E documentaries, before I can- before I knew who I would vote for.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 45.29)'''<br /><br />
<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris:, Chris what did you see in him that you say in your self?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Like for one thing we were like outcasts, at least one point in our lives.<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Wait, wait hold up earlier you said that you thought he would probably paint the white house black.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh oh that was my father’s joke he said that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Is your father a racist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but you see I drew that for him before I saw the documentaries so respectfully withdrew that comic page.<br /><br />
'''???:''' does your father hate black people.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Not necessarily but it’s just how my father just how my father that does not reflect in any way that’s how he felt (annoying ass noise in the background)<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Man that racist.<br /><br />
'''??? :''' Hey Chris I so the ahh saw the Sonichu and Rosechu love sack that you put up and I thought if was pretty cool for (you adult friends?) I just had a question though: do you have any plans in the comic to have romance between you and one of the hedgehogs I mean-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Yelling) No no no<br /><br />
'''???:''' -we would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' I mean is was just wondering because there are fans how would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Now- now that you answered the his question my kind of relates to his what are your thoughts on inter racial breeding and marriages?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would not agree of disagree with them but in my personal preference I would fell- I would feel more comfortable in having a full relationship with a white woman but I am willing- am still willing to be friends and acquaintances and give and have respect for the black women as well.<br /><br />
'''???:''' What about Asians like Japanese?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I’m ok with them as well (yelling) a once.<br /><br />
'''???:''' So would you get married with a Japanese woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hhhmmmm I would have, yes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> but I’m giving Julie to opportunity here.<br /><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: Julie’s a lucky woman.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris, I was just wondering, is Silvana gonna become one of the good guys, like- like Black Sonichu did before?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There’s a possibility but I have not given that a co- I have not confirmed that yet.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Uh, is she gonna lose the male sexual parts and become a full-fledged woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhhmmm possibly but I haven’t given that- I haven't given that thought either.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Also um I was reading (?Phillip’s?) question, Chris what did you want to be when you were little?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don’t remember, I do not remember. I’m just making it as I go basically.<br /><br />
'''???:''' is there ever gonna be like uh, an end to your sonichu series like a finale?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hmmmm I don’t know, probably would not.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Oh so it keeps going and going?<br /><br />
???: You ever consider making comic about the history of CWCville?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhmmmm an episode dedicated towards that possibility.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris are you going to keep the name changes that you made or are you going back to the original names?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahhh ya I’m keeping the name changes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' But you know umm Nintendo was umm, y'know, they sent you a letter you never really talk about it further.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but at least- at least- the hel- they use to benefit me for the fact that uh allowed me to fix noting in that sense so I couldn’t be sued by such people in that sense.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 50 min)'''<br /><br />
<br />
(scattered reactions)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So the name changes were good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So uh, Chris I was wondering if uh Mary- Mary Lee Walsh Or I guess the new name: Ryam Sla- I don't know-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Sla-weel.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Slaweel, thank you. Uhm, if she were to use her magic to curse Rosechu with a penis, would Soni- what- wou- would that test the relationship between Sonichu and her? While they were fighting the battle to have it removed, I'm just curious.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... Firstly uh, she does not- she does not have the power ch- to do that.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I just thought you know, remember you did the story about 4-cent-garbage and drawing all the- the picture and-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah you what, that's one- that's one thing: drawing them, but not actually putting them on the character.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Cause I think that would be like an epic story though, like to actually have a quest-<br /><br />
Fan: I'll second that.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -to go to have that penis removed from Rosechu. I mean it's a test of romance between her and Sonichu.<br /><br />
(muttering)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And when that prevails and the penis is removed and everybody- everybody lives happily ever after. Y'know that would be awesome.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnnnnnh, I dunno I have to- I dunno I have to think about that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It is a really good idea. I like it.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I do too.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah, that's good.<br /><br />
Other fan: It could show just how much Rosechu means to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I'll- I'll consider it but I'm not making any promises.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' We understand.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(several talking at once)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -decided on that subject?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm working on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' If you actually decide to go forward with that story? Do you think maybe- maybe you could give her a talking penis?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!!!<br /><br />
(laughter from various people)<br /><br />
(unintelligible responses)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ok, I think- I think we've talked enough about that one guys.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I have a question that doesn't involve penises.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Anyway, my question is since we've been hearing lot of vicious lies and slander about this, could you confirm exactly why you've been fired from your job at Wendy's Chris? Cause we've been hearing all sorts of- of crazy things and we wanna know the truth.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmmmmmm... well, firstly, what have you heard?<br /><br />
'''Other guy:'''Well we heard that uh you... we've heard so many things like you helped a small child and you did a Donald Duck impersonation and you scared the child.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... also that- also that is correct but I did not scare the child. The child was tired, I was only trying ta- I was only trying to make the child feel better. That's a little amusement. But I did not make the child cry, the child was already- was just tired.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' So you didn't help them cut their food and... yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I did help them- help them get their food to- by giving them uhh, by giving them bags and a top for their baked potato boat.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris, when will um, the pictures of Zapina, appear on the um, 18 plus page?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that was a deleted scene! That was a deleted scene.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Why was it deleted?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basically, hhh... y'c- y'cant' really have it if you don't have Rosechu working to take the- working to take the pictures of herself up in the bathroom. Cause like can't have one without the other.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaahhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I don't know if this is a good question but there's something I wonder about that- we kind of have this DVD you made and... y'know, we never unfortunately got... but I'm curious um... do you ever plan to release it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I'd pay money for that, I think everyone else here would probably pay money for it too.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Indeed.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (breaking up) I wanna ask a question.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I hear it's also on YouTube.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris do you know that you've influenced the rap/hip hop community?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmh... uh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I just wanted to mention that because I saw some YouTube videos and it- and- and from some underground hip hop artists such as Immortal Technique and they've sampled some of your voice audio complaining about your struggles with uhm... with the school board, with the security guards and they were- they felt so empowered that they actually took those words and mad'em into a very powerful rap song. How does that- how is your reaction to that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhhhh... basically I have not watched those videos so... I don't have an opinion.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I will provide you a link to that, hold on a moment.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh that's ok, actually I uh, did sample one. The one where they basically played the parody from "Can't touch this".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, no, trust me it's waaay more serious than that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I still haven't heard of- heard of what you're talking about.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Nevermind.<br /><br />
(rustling and moving noises)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do an impression of MC Hammer?<br /><br />
(more clicking and rustling)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Can't touch this do do do doo do dooo Can't touch this! Do do do dooo do do do... can't touch this.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' That was- heheheh.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Awesome.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you- can you do Dr. Nick Riviera from the Simpsons?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> HIIII EVERYBODY!<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hello Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hi Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hi Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that should say Dr. Nick cause that's who I'm imitatin'.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''???:''' That uh-<br /><br />
'''???:''' HELLOOO EV'RYBODY!!!!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well that-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hi Dr. Nick!<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Thank you, I love the Simpsons.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do... Peter from Family Guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhenhenhenh... Hey Lois! Look at me! I'm just (unclear) you nose, and I'm eatin' your nose.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh that's dead on.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Oh would you- Omicron's been interested in tis- would you actually make a documentary like- like your other DVD but make your daily life?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... I'm... yeah I might but uh... I'm not su- I'm not sure bout it at the moment.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaaaaaaanh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris can you do Mario? You know from Super Mario?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hay paisano! How you doin' mistah hedgehog!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's very good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then Sonic- then Sonic would say "what?!?"<br /><br />
(giggling)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris do you have any plans to make a video of yourself taking a dump on a Hexbox?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No! That's gross.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Yeah that was pretty sick right there.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Let's ban him.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's bad enough I cut in half with an axe.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> and one of the elevator jokes...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Oh we remember that, that was a classic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And I earned a trophy for that.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmm...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Yeah, I remember that, it was destroying a Hexbox by cutting it in half if I remember...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' If I were to draw nude Zapina fanart, uhm, would you put them on the site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... uhh, your- you uh- free to draw them at your- at your own- own preference, but I will not be- I will not put it on the website because- cause- because I will not want to break any laws of having underage portrayals- portrayals of underage nudity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Isn't Dot a child?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry... what?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dot, from Animaniacs.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' So-uh- uhm- I think I looked up somewhere that um, drawings do not count, they're just lines on paper not like real pictures that are horrible.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah I believe-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Draw-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (cut off)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Those illustrations do not count as child pornography. Because with drawing it's art- it's artistic merit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Welll... I dunno, I guess it depends I have to- but- y'know you could do the drawing and I'll think- I'll consider it.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, would it be possible to get any pictures of Sonichu having anal sex with Rosechu?<br /><br />
(pause... thumps and feedback)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm considering that but...<br /><br />
'''Accented woman''' Who keeps letting this person in? You are very offensive.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -and and, if you draw those, do you think that Rosechu would actually clean Sonichu's penis off with her mouth (laugh) w-when they're done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nah, no, I don't think so, I think- I think- I think it would be unh- yeah w-wash it off with a washcloth.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Do you think then, at that point then they would sell the washcloth on eBay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!<br /><br />
(people talking over each other)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, no, no more potty humor, all right?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah alright, okay<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Unrelated to party humor, I want to ask that in your Springbreak uhh Issue of Sonichu you had an introduction of a, of new character, the [[Yawning Squirtle|squirtle]] and I wanna ask<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:''' (interrupting)</span> No, that's, no, no, no, that's not just a character, I was, I was not introducing a new character, I was just doing like a poster thing for a bubble speak under one, I thought I just draw some water type pokemon un-in there<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I understand but the thing is there is huge cult following for that character and I strongly suggest that you should capalize on that and, and make him to a main character<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eh... No, I don't think so<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's just sleeping Squirtle work- waking up!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, people just thought he was really cute and yawning Squirtle, I don't know, I heard someone say, man wouldn't it be great if he would be that [[Autistic|dopey]] sidekick that he'd come and they'd be like, like, he'd come in and say something silly after someone did something and they would be like "Squirtle"!<br /><br />
People laughing and talking over each other<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um...<br /><br />
???: Yo, it makes you *unintelligible* (Chris and someone talk over another)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yes Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I'm asking you about... Hm... Never mind, I lost my train of thought. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's okay. These guys made me lose a train of thought as well. Doesn't multiple inputs.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yes, kinda lotta control here. I might- I may have to... never mind<br /><br />
Silence<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I never lose my train of thought because I have a GPS tracking system on it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, that was a good joke. (chuckle)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, could you tell us a joke right now. Just any joke.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay, here is a fuck- here is a funny- here is a funny mind scream. Funny rhyme scheme... not to be taken literally:<br /><br />
On your Game Boy Advance SP<br /><br />
create 'yer MII<br /><br />
den play it on WII<br /><br />
with your PSP<br /><br />
hooked to your PS3<br /><br />
cause it's fun<br /><br />
see?<br /><br />
And never ff, and never play a [[Hex Box]] 360<br /><br />
Because it's stupid and you're not a dummy (in childlike voice)<br /><br />
Mock laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That is really good.<br />
'''Fan''': Chris is that something you made up?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I made that up.<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Chris, Chris, can I write that down and tribute to quote you that? Oh man, that's good<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) So you mean to type it up and you quote me on the rhyme scheme?<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Yeah, I'd like that. I've been thinking about making a quote book like a mini Chris quote book like something you could open and have a cool line to say when you're on a party and you're like right things.<br /><br />
People talking over Chris and Alucard<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, well I'm typing it up for Alucard, so...<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Thank you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, can we hear one more?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay well here, okay um, okay here is an [[Christian's sex joke|adult joke]] I once come up with a long time ago.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': This is going to be good!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright- Alright there's this married couple, Bob and Jane, and they've been- they were looking forward to having children. So, one night, Bob comes home from work, and uh Jane says, "Hi, you had a good day, dear?" And he sa- and she sa-- he says, "Nah, it's been a long day, darling" And she said, "Well, it's okay, why don't we go upstairs, and we'll have some Breakfast." And he says, "Breakfast, at Nine p.m.?" And she says, "Sure, you bring the MILK, and I'll get an EGG."<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yo, I heard that before, man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then later, they had a boy and a girl, Junior Bacon and Orange Juice. All Part of a Balanced Breakfast.<br /><br />
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif]]<br /><br />
Perplexed silence<br />
<br />
'''Fan''': Hey, Chris, how do you solve a Mexican tank?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Stand in front of it?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': No, man, shoot the guys pushing at it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fans''': Oh that's a good one.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' I got one.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get a bunch of [[Niggos|blacks]] in a car?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Throw some chicken in.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get them out of the car?<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Job application.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What do you call a beach of black people buried up to their necks?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Afro-turf.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I came up with one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what's the difference between a black man and a pizza?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': A pizza can feed a family of four.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': How do you stop black people from jumping on a bed?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, enough racist jokes.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Put velcro on the ceiling.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enough, enough black jokes.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, uh Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Sorry<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I showed by friend that over 18 site, and he said, that he um, he um, you know he, he masturbated to it. Does that make you feel (interrupted)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's good, that's basically the reaction I would be going for. Among the male ca... among the male population, being attracted to the women.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But those are your drawings, it's like, I think he's gay now. I mean, you're a guy and you drew those.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm drawing, I'm drawing female characters.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yah, but it's drawn by you and you're, like, I don't know. It's kind of awkward for me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris, I actually need to thank you, the pictures on that site, it looked like the camera was inside Sonichu's penis when Rosechu was giving him a blowjob. That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. I've always wanted to have a camera in my penis so that I could see that if I ever got a blowjob, that would be awesome, I just wanted to say thank you very much for that perspective. It's the first time I've ever seen it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': There's a question here on the site, oh sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, well I see it... no I don't basically masturbate to my own drawings.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But you're okay if other people do, right? Even guys?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You're okay if other people, you know, masturbate to your drawings? Even if they're guys, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If the guys are masturbating to the female drawings, then yes, that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I just thought it was kind of awkward, but maybe I'm seeing it a different way.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I doubt that, uh, having a whole bunch of drawings of naked female characters can be misinterpreted as something else.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Can I to ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': One time, a friend and I were looking at porn together, and we masturbated together, but the porn was straight, ordinary porn. Is this gay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I'm sorry, where you looking at naked women?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Yes, but we were in the same room, masturbating.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, if you both were thinking about the naked women you were looking at, then I would definitely say you both are straight, cuss you're not thinking about each other, you're thinking about the women.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Right. <br /><br />
'''Fan''': Would you do that with someone?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': I'm relieved.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Man, nigger you gay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Shut up. Would you do that with someone? Like a guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Nah, I'm straight dog.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I'd, yeah I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Omnicron has a question on here, on the side here.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You see it, or?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. That's not straight.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what about the earlier question.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, the one before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, which one before? Oh, you mean...<br /><br />
(All talk at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, what do you think about-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wait, wait let him answer.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Let him answer that one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was gonna rephrase it but okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'd say it would depend on your interpretation, what is adultery to you?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But, you know, isn't the Bible only supposed to be interpreted, it's the word of God, you're not really supposed to interpret it any other way.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': It is what it is.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's in English.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh, I have no comment.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, that's what my, uh, you know I was talking about my mom saw those drawings. I mean, not the drawings, the posters, the playboy posters and that's basically what she got bad about. She said I was committing adultery.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah okay, if you don't want to talk about it, fine.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, hmmm, I think you shou, I think you should, uh, when you, I think I can see where this could be interpreted one way or another, it depends on how you look at the woman. I mean, alright, you're looking at the, uh woman, you might imagine her naked, but, I mean, you would respe- I mean, you would, you would still respect, I mean, if you were still respecting that woman, you would appreciate her more for like who she was aside or in addition to the nudity, then that's not as bad as just, as just only doing it for the appearance.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's why, uh, that's why the playboy magazines, they give you the introductions of the women. It's like letting you know who they are (unintelligible).<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh but, yeah, but there weren't any, uh, descriptions under the, yeah never mind.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Thank you for the clarification Chris.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris, do you love America?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm patriotic.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's good. I was wondering if you could sing the national anthem for us?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [[Wikipedia:My Country, 'Tis of Thee| My country tis' of thee. Sweet land of liberty. Of thee, of thee I sing.]] I don't remember the rest.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Lands where my fathers died.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Land of the pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
(Fans all start singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Stop it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey I'll, I'll tell y'all a funny joke that's kind of patriotic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, you got this, you got this funny Mexican- you got this funny Mexican guy, and he just, he just come back home to Meh-he-co after an American visit. He's like (high pitched voice) Oh the people there are so very friendly. I mean, I go to the basketball game. I sit in the back row. I sit in the back row. And then, and then, and then all of a su- and then all of the sudden right before the game started, everyone turned around, put their hands on their chests, and they say, "Oh say can you seeeeee"!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I thought you said no racist jokes?<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': Yeah man, that ain't cool!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was a name, it was a name joke.<br /><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''':...Spanish language<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm kind of offended by that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': That's racist dog. That ain't cool.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': You laugh you support terrorism.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ¿Qué?<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What'd you say?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What the hell? Who said that?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Forget it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I said, you laugh, you support terrorism.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, he's gone.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Awful Mr. T impression) I pity the fool, who try and misinterpret things, and twist them around, and then jam new words into my mouth.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You do a good Mr. T<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah you do.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) no jibber jabber.<br /><br />
(Fans laugh)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, did you watch the A-team back in the day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No but, no but, basica- but I have seen Mr. T. And then I also, I also saw when he guest, when he quest starred in an episode of Alvin and the Chipmunks.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I saw that episode, he helped uh Theodore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Theodore was getting picked on, yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, you posted a link here.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well at my [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|Methodist church]], uh, sex before marriage is okay as long as, uh, she and I, we love each other very much and truly.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But that's what they tell you, I'm talking about the word of God.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *Sigh* Okay, I'm getting tired, okay, I'm getting tired here, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, but...<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, sorry, no more of that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, you're right. Please stay Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay. Alright, I'll stay a little while longer.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, if anyone does, if anyone asks anything that makes him feel uncomfortable, I'm gonna kick you out of the room.<br /><br />
(Everyone speaks)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Chris, could you give me some advice?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I have a Japanese friend, he's, he's actually 26 and he's never had a girlfriend and we asked him some questions, just joking around one day. And we asked him if his, when he gets married, if his wife wanted to sleep with another man, would he be okay with it, and he actually said yes, as long as she wasn't being forced. Now that kind of bothered us, because us Americans, right, we think that marriage, and you know you're with somebody, they should be faithful, but he doesn't seem to think so, so I wanted to see if you had any advice maybe on what we could do to try and convince him that his viewpoint is wrong.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, hmm, it's not necessarily that the viewpoint is wrong. See, the thing is, what, to, to quote, to make it accepta- to make it like as if you're actually cheating on somebody, cheating on your spouse in the marriage, it's like not telling them, not telling him, not telling him or her about it beforehand, but it's like, you know, you, it's like you tell them beforehand and you get their approval, it's, it's okay, even if they don't want to be part of it. But not telling them, that's definitely like uh, cheating on them.<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that's another thing I would have to think about, cause, got a bit of a, couple of items of destruction that need to be repaired<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I just got, I just talked to that one friend I was talking about who, uh, saw your website, the 18 one, and it turns out he's, he's gay, he's actually gay and he fapped to, uh I mean he masturbated to, uh, Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hahaha, your friend's a fag.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': And I think he's...<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out for 15 seconds)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ...about that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I think in case you would definitely want to let him know that you are straight and you don't want that kind of relationship, and maybe, and you know<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I tell him just to get the hell away from your site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm not saying that, but like, uh, you know, you don't want that kind, you don't, I mean that's, that's basically confirmed on that note. So, uh, you want, you still wanna be friends but you don't, but you're not into that kind of thing.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I mean, he was looking at your site, like, the 18 site and he was in like, um-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Over 18.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': The over 18 site you made. The loveshack. I thought he was just like, you know, masturbating to Rosechu, but it turns out he was attracted to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *sigh* Uhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, I don't think I'll be friends with this guy anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, yeah, then tell him, yeah, to get the hell out of your house and stay away if you don't want to be friends anymore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Seems like you know too many gay friends mister.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh shut up.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris, you know how-<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's not my fault. <br /><br />
'''Another fan''': You know how cologne or perfume, you know, women wear that to try and attract men? Do you think that farts attract gay guys to each other?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Now that's stupid! Not only is that stupid, but it's gross.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Here, I'm gonna take that question and I'm gonna, I'm gonna take that question and spin that into something that's less weird. What would you say the best cologne or whatever a guy could wear to get a girl's attention?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I recommend [[Axe|Axe]] body spray.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh yeah? I think I tried that one time.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': That actually does it for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What scent do you use?<br /><br />
(All speak)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Don't you use ass body spray?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Mmm, love it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Does the Axe effect, does it really exist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Does Axe exist?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, the Axe effect. You know, they say in the commercials spray it and girls will come to you.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) and it works for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Has it worked for you Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, well, yeah, I, yeah I haven't got that working for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I think it's a scam personally.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I mean... I mean, Old Spice is pretty good. I had, I had like a couple of girls go up to me asking me for dates with Old Spice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I actually wore that Orion sent, uhh, still smelling it. So it will work Chris, you just gotta give it time.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Using the Axe.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Cameron but, isn't Axe spray for men?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': No no no no no no no, see, see I said a boyfriend, a boyfriend that I met.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, okay.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah. *laughs*<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That makes sense.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, silly, silly. I have a question for you Chris, what celebrities have you met?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Well what I'm saying is the Axe effect doesn't work. Okay, sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't actually met other celebrities in person, my real life, unless you count a local radio DJ.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I've met the DJ of my radio station 95.1 and [[Excel Saga|Monica Rial]], and meeting Monica Rial was just a treat.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ahhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was, it was good.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, she's pretty.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Maybe you should go to her and, um, maybe she could be like a contact for voice acting. I mean, you do pretty good imitations.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Do Homer Simpson!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Homer Simpson impression) Oh, look at me! I'm a stupid old person, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp, D'OH!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That was awesome<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Who else can you do Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What other imitations can you do?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, a lot. It depends on if you name it, I might recall, if you name the person or character I'll, if I can recall my memory than I will imitate that person.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Can you try Bender from Futurama?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I reckon I can do a pretty good Bender! I can twist off my arm and, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, um, since my girlfr-(clears throat)-sorry. Since my girlfriend broke up with me, I was just wondering if you could give me any tips to like, pick up y'know, another girlfriend?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) Valentine's Day is coming.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah. It's gonna be lonely without her, y'know.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah I know.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Can you help?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) No I do not know what tha- neither of them sound like in voices so I can't imitate them. (sigh) As for- as for dating advice uh, if you're- when you're going out to meet a woman, and this is like advice that's like it could've been taken from my, taken from my own advice I gave in the, the one in the video I did when I just turned 25. But it was definitely, it was given, but it was offered in this book written by a nine-year-old.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> When you're going to uh find yourself a woman, you just try to stay calm. And uh be polite, friendly. Don't uh let your nerves get the best of ya.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What should I say, what should I say here, y'know, to the girl?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Start with "hello" and "how are you".<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I ask her, should I like do a pick-up line? Do those work?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Um, sometimes. But I wouldn't, I wouldn't exactly count on it in a desperate situation. But I mean like uh, talk about yourself a little bit saying like, "Ooh did you read in the paper today about this article that really caught my eye?"<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was thinking about standing by the wall with [[Attraction Sign|a sign]]. Saying that I need a girlfriend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, don't- don't do that. That makes you look retarded.<br /><br />
(Laughter)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What about wearing a sticker that says you're single. Have you ever tried that? Do you think that would work?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what was that? A stick-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wearing like a uh, a sticker that says "I'm single".<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Wait a second I'm not done yet.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Oh I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I got that idea from your comic. I mean I thought it was a-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. I later learned that that, I already learned from my mother that made me look retarded. (Female fan laughs) To other people, so...<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Ohh. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So I stop- So I stopped- So I stopped doing that a long time ago and, I don't know (what payed attention?)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mm. Basically I'm running from others that have offered such advice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh yeah like John Tesh I remember that in your news dash.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. And also it's like uh there's an expression in my elementary somewhere uh, those who can't teach.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Um, I remember (unintelligible). Um, I was um, looking at um (something), how do you feel about Obama swearing in his book? Even read it out loud in the audiobook version.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hm. (rustling and typing in the background) Hm. Ah, yeah I heard of that, didn't care much, didn't uh give much thought into it so... Uh swearing yeah don't care much for it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': So Chris I was just wondering uh, like can you hear me?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I can hear you.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Uhh. Does wearing that medallion, does that attract females? I was thinking about making my own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) You could do what you want, to try and make yourself stand out. Um... But it depends on if you, it depends on other peoples' point of uh you I guess at this point, um... You might want to get a second opinion. I mean it's not like I can see you over da Mumble and uh say what makes you look okay and what makes you look NOT okay. Yeah, g- get a second opinion from somebody else in person.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What about you, do you think that medallion makes you look, y'know, more attractive to girls?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhmmm. Yeah. Yeah I don't know. I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah I think it looks pretty cool on you. So that's, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well you could try it, see if you could try and see if it works for ya.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Speaking, speaking of the medallion, I noticed you wear it on the outside. Have you ever done any replacing the chain on it to something a little more comfortable?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh no. It's fine. It's fine. I mean I'd say that this uh the necklace chain with the like a pair- like a pair of- like a pair of keyrings with a belt buckle on them.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm. Alright.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris in hentai, the uh guys- like the girls usually say no but the, the guy touches her a bit and she gets into it. I was just wondering if you think that really works, have you ever tried that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh. I'm sorry, could you repeat that?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': I said in hentai, y'know the Japanese um, kinda pornography-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Yeah-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': -usually, the, the girl kind of says no but then the guy starts touching her boobs or something and she gets real excited and gets into it. I was just wondering if you think that really works. Can you just make a girl excited and into you just like t hat?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhh... Yeah I don't think so. I me- I mean in most of the time I'm sure you would probably just, the girl would probably just turn around and slap you right in the face or kick you in the groin.<br /><br />
(Various pained groans)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, you were saying it's educational. I think I saw that in a porn too.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Uh. Also (unintelligible) asked "How far have you gotten with a girl"?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I've never even been on a first date in my lifetime.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ohhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> At this point.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris?<br /><br />
(Fans talk over each other)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I was suggesting uh Chris, I have family in Bristow, Virginia. I've been out there a lot. And you know, they're- I mean, people that I've seen in Virginia don't really like anime and things that much. Have you ever considered maybe trying to meet a girl in the west coast? Because a lot of people, especially universities are into anime culture. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) Yeah but I'm no- I'm not planning on traveling outside of my state. Plus I would prefer to keep it local.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah.<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
(Everyone talks over each other)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but to see the world means to have to have the money to actually go see the world.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Well You just have to save up a little bit.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah. I mean you know, trains are good.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': (strange incognizable noise)<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Gas is cheap now.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': You can meet so many people just going on a road trip or just you know, taking the bus or something I mean it's not too expensive, it's cheaper than a plane- (Chris talks over him)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Yeah, I hear you on that. But I just like, you know, if I want to go on a road trip I'd uh, I would not like to go it alone. I'd like to have my sweetheart by my side.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Mmm.<br><br />
'''Fan''': The point is you could always get a job. That's what I did once a-(cut off)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh.<br><br />
(Fans talk over each other)<br><br />
'''Other fan''': -and I wanted to meet a girl? I got this t-shirt that says "ask me about my large and attractive penis" and I wear that to the mall and it works every time.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Are you kidding, really?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yes. (cut off)<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Well that's interesting. (laughs) I have to meet you some time. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah boy. Uhh, alright, gentleman's clubs um...<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what was that noise just now?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Noise?<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I heard like a (snorts) noise.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Yeah, that was probably me be- because I was like objecting to the uh, when he was describing what it said on his t-shirt.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah that wasn't cool. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': You guys have no taste. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah-<br><br />
'''Guy''': Disgusting!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I know.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay um. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>But it just uh, just it m- just ma- I mean the way I see it, see somebody else wearing that it makes, it uh, it makes- it s- it would appear that guy is only looking for sex and women would be turned by sh- sh- sex right away at that point.<br><br />
'''Guy''': Yeah it kinda sums up (cut off)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Um, so...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um... (Chris and Fan talk over each other) Yeah let me answer this guy's question. Yeah I don't know much about gentleman's clubs so I can't really answer that question. A, and uh... <br><br />
'''Fan''': What about you though, like when you're looking for a girl, does like sex really matter? Like, to attractiveness?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, er, yeah. Eventually the se- yeah. Attractiveness does matter in one point of view but uh, but if you think about it it's like you want to get to know the person, the woman inside as well. Um, so, (I'd rather be in it?) so like uh, we were very close to each other emotionally and like friends, then the sex. Like uh, how Panda and I were very... close.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Hmm.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': What happened to Panda?<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah what happened to her?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't heard fermer- I haven't heard from her in over two weeks and then recently there were, there was the fires in Australia close to by where she was. So I don't know whether she's still alive or not. I haven't heard from her in over a coupl- over two weeks.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': That's awful.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah. I heard it was real bad, it was like a hundred and eight people died from those fires.<br><br />
'''Black fan''': Daaaamn!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but you know it's okay that at least I have uh, at least I have uh, at least I have a good woman who w- who's willing to uh be at my side at this point.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Man... Uh-<br><br />
(Multiple people talk at once)<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': -for the people who are dead?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': So you feel no remorse for the people who have died in Australia?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh no no, I DO feel remorse. Especially to Sarah sh- eh- I mean... I worry about her she's still ali- I worry about- I'm concerned if she's actually dead or still alive.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah I'm sorry to hear that.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I me- I mean, I mean I'd li- I mean I pray every day that she's still alive safe and well. And that she contact me soon.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': But you... you automatically, you basically abandoned her for Julie.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But I did not basically abandon her for Julie.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': That is what it appear- seems like.<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh)...(sigh)<br><br />
'''Fan''': She could be still alive, you never know.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Even if she isn't still alive, take solace in the fact with her perfectly barbequed remains fed to survivors.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> SHUT UP!!!<br><br />
'''Fan''': Um, that was too far, you're going too far man.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. And at this point I care about both- I care about of uh both of them equally. Both uh Sarah and Julie. But it's like, it's like you know uh, I'm uh stil- if she let's me- if she uh gets in contact with me, letting me know that she's still alive, and uhh she...<br><br />
'''Fan''': But I'm letting you know Julie, if she's still alive what are you gonna do then?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': And if people actually did eat her what would you do to them?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> OH SHUT UP!!!! Kick that guy out!<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
(laughter in background)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay um. Uh...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, but you know in all seriousness if Sarah gets in contact with me and lets me know she's gonna be coming my way in real life, and uh-<br><br />
'''Fan''': You're not gonna dump Julie are you?<br><br />
(uneasy pause)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I wouldn't dump Julie as a friend.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh but! Oh...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie I still, Julie I still love you.<br><br />
'''Late guy''': Hello everyone.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But you told me I was your sweetheart, didn't you?<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh hello, Doctor.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm. (stress sigh) Julie I'm going through a- I'm going through a transition right now so it's kind of hard for me to make uh, short watch of what I say at points and y'know answering these kind of questions.<br><br />
'''Fan''': I'm sorry uh, I don't mean to offend you or anything. Well I was just wondering-<br><br />
'''Guy''': (unintelligible) guy Chris. <br><br />
'''Other guy''': Uncalled for. <br><br />
'''Black fan''': Y'know what, don't worry about Sarah. Cause, y'know it usually takes like, like months for a person, like a victim of a fire or a flood of some crap like that, to y'know find shelter and then phone and internet and all that.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': You know, if the place is in a state of emergency, people are getting moved around all over the place, there's people in the hospital, I'm sure she's fine she just can't y'know talk to anyone.<br><br />
'''Guy''': What about Alucard's question?<br><br />
'''Fan''': Wait, yeah.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) Uh, I can't answer that question.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm?<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Why not?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because I'm still in a transition right- I'm still in a transition from Sarah to Julie at this point so uh I can't answer that question right now cause I wouldn't know how to answer it.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': It seems-<br><br />
'''Guy''': So you "transition"?<br><br />
'''Fan''': It's a hard choice, I can't blame you I mean, yeah.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I mean you know what, that's- that's a flat out bad question, I mean I would- I'd be able-<br><br />
'''Other guy''': It's quite valid.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (aggravated) Auuuughh! Okay now I'm gettin' uh, okay now my head's out of order.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Oh.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': I've had that problem too.<br><br />
'''Guy''': It's never fun.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay forget it then.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Uh okay I got, I got one. Impressions, impressions! Uh, can you do one of Bill Clinton?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... no.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Um, Chris? Do you-<br><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh)<br><br />
'''Other guy''': I was wondering do you watch the Boondocks on Adult Swim?<br><br />
'''Black fan''': Aw yeah that's my show!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I've watched the Boondocks.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Did you enjoy it?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's alright.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Can you do any imitations of the characters there, like Uncle Ruckus?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent gibberish) -dem niggers over there! Sing along if you know the words to that song I just made up.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': What was that?<br><br />
'''Guy''': That was, wait, what?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That was Uncle Ruckus. Well I'll tell ya what I sell propane and propane accessories all day long! (begins a high-pitched cackling and squeals more gibberish)... That was-<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Could you do Meowth from Pokemon?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Meowth!<br><br />
'''Fan''': The talking Meowth.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Meowth! ... (cackles again) Aye Jessie, James, we gotta go snag that Pikachu again!<br><br />
'''British guy''': Do you know how to do the Team Rocket song?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, the Team Rocket song er, do you mean the motto?<br><br />
'''British guy''': Myes the motto, the classic one.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Hmmmm... Prepare for trouble make it double, to protect the world from devastation, to uni- to unite all people- o- (sigh)...<br><br />
'''Guy''': ...in our nation!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mm. Anyway... (sigh) Hang on I'm a little mixed up here. Prepare for trouble make it double, to protect the world from devastation, to unite all people within our nation, to debi- to debide(sic) the evils of truth and love, to extend our reach to the stars above. Team Rocket blast off to the speed of light, surrender now or prepare to fight.<br><br />
'''Guy''': ... Meowth, that's right.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': That's right!<br><br />
(chuckling)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Now hand over the Pikachu!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. (sigh)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Oh come on-<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': -than Sonichu, because Sonichu is obviously more powerful than Pikachu!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I will not hand over the Sonichu, so there. (pause) Alucard, stop asking the questions please?<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': Yes Alucard you are very annoying.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah someone kick him out.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br><br />
'''Guy''': Good goin' Canine.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
'''Canine''': Anytime. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm. Actually I'm k- actually I'm kind of tired now uh... I'm gonna- I'm gonna head on down now but y'know I'll come back another night.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Okay.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': Well thanks for coming Chris, we really appreciate it.<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: No. I've got a few questions for you Chris, I've been waiting.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Clyde no, no, no.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': How did he get in here?<br><br />
(Everyone yells over each other)<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: It's important!<br><br />
'''Guy''': Ohh he leeeft!<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: No, no, shut up, shut up-<br><br />
'''Other guy''': He's not coming back, give up.<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: Tell him it's important it's about Panda!<br><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm digesting her right now.<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: That will get him back in, I know it.<br><br />
'''Guy''': What's the important news?<br><br />
<br />
[End recording]<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 6|Mumble Chat 6]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 8|Mumble Chat 8]]|}}<br />
<br />
==Links==<br />
* [https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBWklfakp0TGdDSkU Download]<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
<br />
[[Christian's sex joke]] - Used during this chat.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_7&diff=163104Mumble 72012-09-29T18:34:06Z<p>Irisviel: </p>
<hr />
<div>'''Mumble 7''' is the seventh of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]], held on 13 [[February 2009]].<br />
<br />
Appears to be the genesis for the "Power" videos in which Chris attempts and fails to prove his [[I AM STRONG|strength]] and [[CWC Fighter|fighting]] [[Challenge For Clyde|skill]], though these would not materialize for several months.<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
* A fan talks to Chris about putting naked posters of girls and pictures of men up in his room up to find out if his friend was a [[homo]] as Chris suggested. He tells Chris that his girlfriend dumped him over the posters and his friend ignored all of them. Chris sees nothing wrong with his advice until Julie tells him that she wouldn't like that. Chris recommends sending an anonymous letter explaining the situation and utterly fails to apologize or show concern.<br />
* Fans point out that Chris shouldn't have to show and prove that he is straight.<br />
* Chris cuts a fan off to let Julie ask a question involving [[pedofork|shota]].<br />
* Fans ask Chris to turn his radio down.<br />
* Chris uses Wal-Mart printer paper & RSVP ballpoint pen to draw, and a 50-pack of Crayola markers to color. Refuses to use color pencils or Photoshop to color, saying he prefers the markers.<br />
* Chris talks about Omicron's redone version of [[Sonichu]], accusing him of plagiarism. Says that the difference between what Omicron is doing and what he is doing is that Sonichu is his. Agrees to let Omicron continue if he credits Chris with the copyright.<br />
* '''Julie is convincing Chris to make videos proving to Clyde how strong he is.''' Chris feels that the [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|dildo breaking video]] proved this. Fans say that Chris's dildo comes apart naturally for cleaning.<br />
* '''A fan recommends making a video showing off his fighting moves to scare Clyde.'''<br />
* Chris is asked why he would use a dildo in proving that he is straight. Chris says that he is straight for crushing it, fans call him a [[homo]] for keeping it.<br />
* Chris [[lie|denies]] [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|using the dildo]], and claims that it's now broken. Fan says it could easily be reassembled. Chris is adamant that it was glued and that it took a lot of strength to pull it apart.<br />
* When asked by Julie, '''Chris admits using super-shears from Cutco to break the dildo glue, claiming to use a lot of strength in the process'''.<br />
* Fans discuss [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]]. Chris insists that it was drawn in protest of [[ED]]. He says it was anonymous, as most women have long brown hair and her eyes were censored.<br />
* Insists that [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:AngelicainGod%27sEyes.JPG the Rule 34 of Angelica Rosechu] is masturbating and enjoying it, and is using her hand to do it.<br />
* Chris thinks Billy Mays is on Home Improvement.<br />
* Chris isn't doing anything on Valentine's Day, as Julie is not there yet.<br />
* Chris discusses the the No-Redheads policy in his [[Love Quest]]. Says that redheads don't attract him unless they are not natural redheads. No piercings or tattoos allowed.<br />
* Chris is OK with blue hair.<br />
* Does a terrible Marge Simpson impersonation.<br />
* Chris impersonates Comic Book Guy and Donald Duck.<br />
* A fan presents the possibility that AIDS was sent by God to kill the [[homos]].<br />
* [[Chris and Religion|Premarital sex being forbidden in Christianity]] is discussed. Chris fumbles for an explanation.<br />
* '''A fan pretending to be black says he believes the government made AIDS to get rid of black people. Chris says that that's the kind of thing a black guy would say'''.<br />
* Premarital sex comes up again. Chris compares it to using porn to practice and learn skills for later.<br />
* The fake black fan calls Chris on his comment from earlier about black guys and AIDS. He makes the excuse that someone else said it first.<br />
* Questions on Sonichu start. Sonichu doesn't wear clothes because it's a comic. Chris isn't sure how [[Blake]] sounds. He might sound black, he might sound like Shadow the Hedgehog. The fake black fan asks why the bad guy has to be black, also mentioning [[Silvana]]. Chris says that he doesn't have to be.<br />
* Chris gets annoyed about the pronunciation of [[Rosechu]] as popularized by the Old Narrator of the [[Audiobooks]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't disagree that the Audiobooks made Sonichu more popular that he ever did'''.<br />
* He doesn't mind fanfics that don't portray Sonichu in a bad light.<br />
* The audio goes low in the main chat and a fan has a private, unrelated conversation for a few minutes.<br />
* Audio comes back as Chris is admitting that the [[B-Manajerk]] was black in real life.<br />
* Chris doesn't watch the news, so doesn't have an opinion on [[Barack Obama|Obama]]. He voted for him because he saw a documentary where he saw more of himself in Obama, namely that he was an outcast at one point.<br />
* A fan says that you should vote based on politics, not personality. Chris says that he is a moderate.<br />
* Chris doesn't know what the financial bailout is. He says that he drew the [[Sonichu 8#The Elevator Gags|racist picture]] of Obama based on his father's joke, before he saw the documentaries that made him vote.<br />
* Chris will not agree or disagree with interracial dating/marriage. He would want a white woman, but he would be [[gal pals|friends]] with others.<br />
* He'd marry an Asian.<br />
* It's not yet known if Silvana will be a good guy or if she will lose her [[pickle|dick]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't know what he wanted to be when he was younger, he's just making it up as he goes along'''.<br />
* '''Chris is keeping the name changes in the comics for legal reasons'''.<br />
* A fan suggests Slaweel cursing Rosechu to have a dick. Chris gets upset before saying that he'll think about it. The fans think it's a great idea. One considers a talking penis for Rosechu. Chris says it's a stupid idea.<br />
* Another fan asks about Chris being sacked from Wendy's. He denies scaring the child with his Donald Duck impersonation, saying that he didn't make him cry.<br />
* Chris might release his DVD one day.<br />
* A fan says that Chris has influenced underground rappers such as Immortal Technique, who has sampled him.<br />
* Chris takes requests. Impersonates MC Hammer, Dr Nick Riviera, Peter from [[Family Guy]], Mario and Sonic, butchering them all and tainting our childhood memories.<br />
* More Sonichu questions. '''Chris won't upload [[Zapina]] [[Rule 34]] because she is underage and Chris is worried about legal ramifications'''. When he is reassured that this would be legal, he says he would consider it. He will also consider Sonichu-Rosechu anal sex. Rosechu would not clean the [[pickle]] with her mouth, she would clean it off with a washcloth. He would not sell the the washcloth on EBay.<br />
* Chris calls a stop to the potty humor displayed throughout the Sonichu questions.<br />
* '''Chris denies that [[Yawning Squirtle]] is a character'''.<br />
* Fans ask for a joke. He recites a dreadful rhyme about Videogame consoles. He then tells his awful [[Christian's sex joke|sex joke]]. Fans start to tell racist jokes about [[niggos|black people]] and Mexicans. Chris calls for a stop to this.<br />
* A fan says that his friend [[mass debating|masturbated]] to the [[rule 34|adult section of Sonichu]] and is now worried that his friend is a [[homo]], as they were drawn by a man. '''Chris says that this is what he intended it for''', and they are drawings of women, so his friend is straight. He doesn't masturbate to his own drawings.<br />
* Chris reassures a fan that [[Mass Debating|masturbating]] in the same room as another man isn't gay as long as both men are thinking of women, but he would not do this.<br />
* Chris offers no comment as to what constitutes adultery.<br />
* Chris says that he is patriotic. Asked to sing the national anthem, he instead mangles a few lines of "My Country, 'Tis of Thee". He then tells a 'patriotic' joke that is insensitive to Mexicans. [[Chris and Hypocrisy|The fans call him on his "no more racist jokes" statement from earlier]].<br />
* Chris does a poor impersonation of Mr T.<br />
* Chris says that if you are married, sleeping with someone else isn't cheating if you have consent from your spouse.<br />
* Chris gives more advice on homos and recommends Axe body spray for attracting girls.<br />
* Chris has not met any celebrities, only local DJs.<br />
* Does impersonations of Homer Simpson and Bender. The two sound identical.<br />
* Chris gives dating advice: Stay calm, polite, friendly and don't let your nerves get the best of you. Say "Hello, how are you" and talk about yourself. '''[[Barbara|His mom]] told him that standing around with a sign makes him look retarded. A female fan cracks up laughing and can't stop'''.<br />
* "Those who can't, teach"<br />
* Chris says he has never even been on a date. Rejects dating suggestions from fans.<br />
* '''Chris was close with Sarah "[[PandaHalo]]" McKenzie, but hasn't heard from her in over two weeks. He heard about the fires and doesn't know if she's still alive. When a fan adds that 108 people were killed in the fires, Chris responds to the entire ordeal with [[Chris and death|"It's OK though, at least I have a good woman who's willing to be by my side at this point"]]'''.<br />
* When pushed, he says he feels remorse for the the victims of the fires and is concerned that [[Sarah Cassandra McKenzie|Panda]] is dead.<br />
* He asserts that he didn't abandon Sarah for [[Julie]].<br />
* '''A fan says that if [[PandaHalo|Sarah]] isn't alive, Chris should take solace that her perfectly barbecued remains fed the survivors. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|SHUT UP!!!]]'''<br />
* Chris says that he cares about Sarah and Julie equally and wouldn't dump Julie as a friend. A fan asks what he will do to the survivors who ate Sarah. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|"SHUT UP!!!"]] and demands that he be booted.<br />
* Fans reassure Chris that Sarah is probably OK.<br />
* Chris does abominable impersonations of Uncle Ruckus from The Boondocks and Hank Hill. '''He sings "Don't Trust Them New [[Niggos|Niggas]] Over There"'''. He also impersonates Meowth and sings the Team Rocket song.<br />
* [[Clyde]] enters. Chris refuses to answer questions and leaves.<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
===Chris proves he is straight===<br />
'''Guy:''' Chris!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all! ''[echoes]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'll be damned.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh, Chris-[gets cut off by another guy]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh you know, can't com- it's uh, can't complain.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' How's construction of the site?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' [unintelligible] so Chris<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I...I need to ask you something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yup?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh... I put those posters, of the... Playboy and everything in my room, and uh, one of my girlfriends saw it, and she got mad at me for looking at other w-... other girls, and she broke up with me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh... I'm sorry to hear that. It could-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, she's calling me a pervert. I-I don't understand this.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Did you... did you ex- did you try to explain to her about situation between you and that guy?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I... I did, and I don't think she understood.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... well, you should try, you should, uh, s-... try, uh, you should try wr-, you should tr-, uh, do you know her email address?<br /><br />
[pause]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So, uh Chris-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' A-also, wait... also, uh, the friend, I was talking about, he, uh, visited, and [typing noises] he, uh, he went into my room, and didn't even notice the posters. He just s-sat in the middle, he didn't s...sit in any uh, part of the room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Huh. Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, uh... so, yeah, I don't know. I mean, my girlfriend broke up with me, called me a pervert, said that I shouldn't be looking at other girls, I mean... I don't know what to do now.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well listen, uh, answer my question, do you have her email address?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Umm... yeah, but she won't... she won't answer me anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm... ok, hmm. Here's what you can do, uh... Do you know your girlfriend's... any of your girlfriend's [[Gal pal|gal-pals]]?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm... well, you should try to... like wr- you should write out... hmm... hmm... here's an idea. S- Write a letter to her and send it via smail mai-, via snail mail, but don't write the return address. On it.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What should I write?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just like, you know, like, they, you know, this is... you know, this is... you, uh, you put your name there, and you, it's, and then you would basically explain the situation between you and that guy, and that's why you had the posters up, well that's why you put the posters up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't really understand what was the point of the posters in the first place?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[sigh]'' it's... ''[sigh]'' if he looks at... if he, if he is very interested, if he is, if he was straight, he would uh, look at the women. Very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But he didn't even notice them. He didn't notice any of the posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, then I guess he is a [[Homos|homo]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' W...well, um, he wasn't looking at anything, not even the guy posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Hmm... He's not blind, surely.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, like, what is he, is he like, uh...I don't know.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I don't know either, man. But, you know at the moment I would suggest you, uh, write the- write the letter to your girlfriend, send the mail, don't write your return address on the envelope, and, uh, mail it to her.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Also my mom saw the posters and she got offended, she's like really religious and st- she said that like, uh, you know, lust is a sin or some shit. Oh, like she said, she's like all against the, the uhh, the like, Playboy in my room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, your- apparently your mom hasn't been [beeps] that open minded that time. So, you know, give her time to reh-cover, she'll uh, she might op- she might open up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I don't think that was a good idea though, I mean, w-why did-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -you suggest it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I was trying to see if he, to, I was trying to s-help you figure out if your uh, if your friend was a homo or not.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I know, but, do you have uh, [Fans talking] Playboy posters in your room?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unclear] I'm very forward.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I have uh, poster of some, of uh, I have a poster in my room of uh, some uh, naked girls I got from adamandeve.com as a bonus.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Then, nobody says anything about it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[clears throat]'' Well, I didn't really have too many oppor- too many people in my room. So, it's kind of like in a hard to notice place.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Um, wondering, um, If you showed anyone, wouldn't they be offended?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe, maybe not, [Fan grunts] it just depends on their point of view.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I wouldn't want the same thing that happened to me to happen to you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I hear you there. Uh, just to so just sound clear... Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie, are you there?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ok, uh, would you be offended if you saw such a poster in my room?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''[breaks up]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, What will, what was that? [Echoes]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie'''</span> Yes I would, kind of.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well that's no problem, I can take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, see that's what I'm talking about, I mean...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, that's why I asked Julie right now, because I respect her. So, because she said that she would, I will take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I've been thinking, um...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you have... [unclear] Chris, I don't think you should look at other woman.[sic] In my opinion.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I see, Julie. Well that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I...I respect that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' She might get jealous, I mean, that's what happened to my...my girlfriend.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, that's fine Julie, I respect your, I respect that. Just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey, can I ask you a question? If uh, he's done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, uh, one more thing, um, you know I've been thinking, uh, I don't really think you need, you know, posters and stuff like,<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' to prove you're straight, I mean, if you're straight, that's all there is to it i-if, am I right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think you're right.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I...I mean, you shouldn't have to prove that you're straight.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> You're right.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I m-mean [line breaks temporarily] Y-you shouldn't have to reassure yours-self. You should just be knowing it, and nothing anybody says, should get very, uh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, it's ve-ah-very-but you see, I have like, I have that [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] in my room, it's just, so that like, you know, for in case I have any-for in case I have any random thoughts, on account really, to tempt me.<br /><br />
''[unintelligible mix of chatter from most participants trying to get their word in]''<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I mean, even if they're random thoughts, even if they're random thoughts, if you know you're ''positive'' about it, you shouldn't have to look at anything to make sure.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, usually.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay. Uh, moving on from all this homosexuality, uh, I have one question, uh- [gets cut off by Chris in the background] ...never mind, [fat douchebag?]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey, ah, let Julie ask a question, let Julie ask her question.<br /><br />
<br />
===7:08 Julie asks about shotacon===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, I was watching you on the Internet yesterday and, what's a shotacon?[slightly cut off]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...I'm sorry, uh-y, I'm sorry, you got cut off, what was that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> What's a sho-[cuts off again]-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...What's a...''short''?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Shot-[cuts off third time, pretty obvious she's saying ''shota'']-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dude, shota.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, shota.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ssshhhh...shota?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, S-H-O-A-T-A [sic].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, it's a word he found online.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, [baby?], yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never heard of that word.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I dunno, if you want to look it up, you can probably find out on an online dictionary...<br /><br />
''[pause, and a weary sigh from someone other than Chris]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'll-I'll take a look. Hang on.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I know some Japanese and I think I've heard that somewhere, like in a magazine or something.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, it's some of that Japanese shit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Probably is. Three moments, I'll look it up.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Okay!<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's radio is audible]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Whoops, that was the wrong one. The wrong bookmark.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' S-H-O-T-A.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I know, I just get the wrong bookmark for...place I wi-for like...dictionary-type website that I have.<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's keyboard taps are audible]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uhhh...Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, now that Julie's done with her question, I also had one.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' He has to find what that means first.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, ''I'm sorry''.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Shit, ah shit, I've just found it on Wikipedia. It's, uh, it's a ma-it's a Japanese name. It's a name of a person. In Japan.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Really.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a Japanese name. I think it's-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh no no, I think you're looking at the wrong thing, it's S- S-H-O-T-A-C-O-N.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> S-H- I mean- O-T-A-C-O-N? Shotacon?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's the same thing, just put C-O-N at the end.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I've read it in a dictionary before, can't remember what it means...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, oh! Okay, here it is, uh..."shotacon, sometimes shortened to shota, is Japanese slang of the phrase 'Shotaro Complex'"...uh..."that describes the attraction to young boys or an individual with such an attraction".<br /><br />
''[Disgusted reactions heard]''<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh my god, what the fuck?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' There's lots of sick people. Y'all are gonna get ricked?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Someone from 4 cent garbage came in and told us to look that up, I didn't-I didn't even want to.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess he's a homo...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Don't worry I banned him already.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Um, Chris, Vivian wants to know if you can like, turn your radio down a bit, it's distracting.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yes, please turn it down.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I thought that was quiet enough, here.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, no, the lady'll probably pick it up<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Alright cool. Merci.<br /><br />
<br />
===10:21 Another fan asks about art supplies===<br />
<br />
'''Another Fan:''' Okay, um, I have a question, um, I like to draw—interrupted by mumbling—I like to draw comics and such, I mean I want to start up a webcomic. What kind of materials do you use?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, like, you mean for drawing?<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well mostly I just use like, uh, paper without lines, like, computer printer paper you can get in, like, Wal-Mart, for an inexpensive price in multiples.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then I use like an RES—RSVP-brand pen with the black ink.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh okay, is it like, um, a gel pen or a ballpoint pen or-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like a ballpoint, it's like a ballpoint pen.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What do you use to color?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I use Crayola brand markers.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would like to—I would—I would—I would recommend getting the Super Tip 50-pack which you can also find at the Wal-Mart.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay. I-[interrupted by someone else on chat]<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's basically-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' At Wal-Mart I usually get the 24-color RoseArts. Those are—those do pretty good too.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhh, Vivian, just so you—just so you know, I'm using the microphone that came with Hey You, Pikachu for Nintendo Sisty-Four [sic].<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, yeah no, no offense, but uh, personally I prefer like, colored pencils and shit cause-[Chris mumbling is heard]-they're like easier to erase. Photoshop [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If you want to use colored pencils that's fine, I'm not, uh, saying that you have to use Crayola markers-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why don't you use colored pencils? They're really good, you should try one on like, at least one page, just try one. One page with just colored pencils.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But um, actually, you can—you can scan your drawings and then color—color them in like, Photoshop or something. [rest of chat murmurs in agreement] That looks really professional, and really good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I prefer using the markers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's just that I-I mean—I mean I've tried—I mean I've colored with colored pencils before, and I just feel best with using markers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I have a question, um, uh, the Hey You Pikachu microphone, how does that work on the, you're using that on your computer? Did you say?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah it's just, yeah, it's like you plug it into uh, into the basic microphone jack.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh, yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Excuse me, I have a nice little Plantronics headset.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Hey Chris can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah, hang on a second, uh... uh, Omicron, that's uh, you're basically, uh, you're basically plagiarizing here. You're even using, uh, parts of my original drawings to, uh, make up your so called real ones and, you're just—you're just parroting—you're just plagiarizing-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's dirty and illegal.<br /><br />
[Unintelligible mumbling]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, you said so yourself, you're being illegal. And plus, and plus I'm-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, isn't combining Sonic with Pikachu the same thing?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, but, but but also, look at this, also I'm looking at this site here, it said, he's claiming the copyright for himself, but he's, but he's not. I mean that's like, but he's, he—he says<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' You need to ban him immediately.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, ban him immediately.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh wait wait wait wait wait...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah maybe you should check-[interrupted by loud noise, probably Chris]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well he said that, he's saying that all of Sonichu material is copyrighted by him, when it's clearly not.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah but you use Sonic and Pikachu, and you copyrighted it-<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' He just offered to give you credit-[interrupted by noisy chatter]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean, I put, I mean, yeah but, I mean, I'm talking about the—the Omnicron [sic] guy here, that's like, just put this link here.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh he offered to give you credit-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes that's the same thing you did.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well no no, he, no-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We decided-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No he's plagiarizing MY Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We just decided [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris it's, it's a parody, kinda like Sonichu is.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but he—yeah, but he's saying, he said—he—on his front page he says, all Sonichu material-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah but he's, he just offered to change it, so are you okay with that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> By changing it to Sonichu X-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, he said he'll give you credit instead of claiming it for himself.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, uh, yeah I would appreciate that, that would be better, yeah, if... he changed that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Alright cool.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Problem solved.<br /><br />
<br />
===15:02 Chris talks about dildos to prove his strength===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes Julie.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you think you could tell everyone about my idea? And, since you're going to do it do you think you could tell everyone so they could look out for it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, your idea... um, oh oh oh, yeah, just basically a video of me standing up to Clyde and showing him how strong I am, doin' a few kicks for the camera or something-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, you should throw some punches, show him what you're made of, you know?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Kick, punch, it's all in the mind ''etc.''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I basically... I pretty much did that when I...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Let him talk, c'mon!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I pretty much did - already proved my strength when I... ripped that... ''dildo'' in half.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Foreign-Sounding Guy:''' Most dildos come apart for cleaning.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' C'mon.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but that thing was screwed together at the seam.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok listen to me...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris...<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' Eh Chris!<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ...could you do a like further test of your strength for me?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''stress sigh'' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I wanna see how strong you are please.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...That's fine, I can do that.<br /><br />
'''Other Fan:''' I mean that's ok, you showed your strength, but you should show her your moves. Like show her, like, what kind of moves you can do.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, let me tell you a story about how this'll work, ok.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' See, my, uh, one of my cousins, uh, this guy at school, kept, y'know, picking on him, calling him gay and stuff, and trying to fight with him, and my cousin told him to sss- y'know, one day, the guy said "Hey man, I'm gonna beat you up" and my cousin said "Look, if I show you some of my moves, I'll prove to you I can kick your ass in a fight" and so my cousin, y'know, he stepped back and, he took, uh, he took Taekwondo, and he did a couple moves, y'know? He just stood there for like five minutes just doing his moves, and, y'know, some punches and kicks and... The guy just backed right off; he didn't even want to talk to him any more. So I think that should work.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> All right, well I'll try that. I'll try that.<br/><br />
'''Guy:''' All right. Sounds good.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br?><br />
'''Fan:''' You try- you always mention about how you're straight but yet in your video about you crushing a dildo, uh, doesn't that kinda like, y'know, not help your cause?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, it proves I'm straight because...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' But you have a dildo.<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I got it free with an order on adameve.com<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' But you ''kept'' it and shit. That ain't cool.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' What I don't... Why were there batteries in...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh yeah Chris, why ''were'' there batteries in it? Why did you keep it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I mean...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it wasn't an easy thing for me to sell, right off the bat, or even to make a profit, so...<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In fact in a way it's a good thing I kept it, cause it allowed me to be able to break it, like I did.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes but why would you keep it?<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why would you keep it?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I woulda saved it for my sweetheart, if she'd wanted it. To use it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Aaaahhh.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But if I were there wouldn't you prefer the real deal?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Some things that metal just can't replace.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Yeah.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I heard that.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' You didn't use it did you?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No I did not.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Did you just throw all the ones you had away?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I only had that one. And there you go, I ri- there you go, I broke it apart.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you just, like, ''take'' it apart, I mean, it did...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' ...seem to come apart, like, screwed on...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I did not take it apart, that thing was glued at the seam. I had to put a lot of strength into breaking it at the middle there.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, but I think, um, showing your moves would be better.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Right.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Clyde would mess with you if you show him you can kick his ass.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey, Chris's a muthafuckin' ''gangsta''!<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Blap blap.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yes, Chris will fuck Clyde's shit up.<br /><br />
(awkward pause)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait, Chris, didn't you say you used a - didn't you say you used scissors to break the dildo?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I pretty much did have to so I could break that ''glued seam''.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, I thought you broke it with your hands.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well I- yeah well I would have but it was dang glued at the seam, so I clipped straight in with the scissors I had.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a pair of Super Shears from [[Cutco]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(feigning interest)'' Huh.<br /><br />
<br />
===19:50 Chris defends his Rule 34===<br />
<br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, let's talk about something else. Uh, Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whenever the announcement of the adult Sonichu page, when I looked at your gallery, very nice stuff, you know, I see a picture of what looks like you with a Sonichu, uh, medallion. Like, and, who's that one girl, exactly?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Who, [[Megan]]?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I thought it was, like, [[Crystal]], cause of the hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, it was - it was originally drawn to be Megan but I censored her eyes to, uh, port- to protect her identity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Mmmmmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''(laughing)'' That's stupid! (?) That's so silly.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I drew that after I found the ED page in November.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you say that?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In protest against it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thought you were going to get rid of it anyway.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I tore up the original drawing, I, in- into squares, and I put in in an envelope.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you upload it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you do that shit? Like, and...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I understand Rosechu, but, like y'know, why, like, something that's from real life. That's the problem (?)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's not necessarily from real life, it depends on you inter- it depends on your interpretation, I mean it's hardly- I mean, '''most women have long brown hair, and the eyes are censored''', so...<br/><br />
(laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''Most'' women?!?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I remember in that one video you were saying it was Megan.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because it broke, because it end up, because it the end it broke up my friend - broke up my friendship eve, my uh, friendship with Megan.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um, can I ask you a question? In the third picture, with [[Angelica Rosechu]], what is... what's happening, is... God... doing...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nope. She's masturbating. And she's enjoying it.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But she has no hands there. How's she doing it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' She's ''enjoying'' it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But she does... She does...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah but how's she doing it? She doesn't have her hands there.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> She does have her hands, she's... ''(stress sigh)'' She's... like most women would be able to do the same thing.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thing it's the angle, Julie. I think it's the angle you were looking at it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah plus uh, the picture wasn't, uh, very - wasn't as clear as, like, you know, I would have liked to have had it, uh, I mean, I had that file for a while, and it...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah some of those are kinda blurry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, some deg- some degraded.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ? a good question, have you drawn anything... of... have you drawn anything like that with me? Cause I would actually like to see, if you did. If so, could you, and let me see? I, uh, sorry, that's very rude to ask.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm sorry, let me answer this guy. Yeah, well, I made a retraction video later saying that I- I disowned that address.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ah, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just after that guy hacked into it and changed to it to suck. And as such.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hang on, I'm gonna take a look at that... My Youtube...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I like this song.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What song?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' The song that's playing in the background of, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what do you think of, uh, what do you think of that guy who advertises products, Billy Mays? What do you think of him?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... Billy... Oh! Yeah he's an ok guy, I watched him on Home Improvement.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Billy Mays?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, that was another guy on Home Improvement, Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No that was the same guy. That was the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Really?!? Let's look up. IMDB, go. ''(sound of typing)''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Believe me, it's the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, I really enjoyed your, um, adult, uh, section of the site.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... okey dokey, very good. Aaahh, trying to figure out how to update the link on this thing here. Oh, maybe under here. Oh there it is, thank God (?), update right now.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(singing)'' You spin me right round baby, right round...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (joining in) Like a record baby, right round round round<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's a classic, I can't help in man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There you are, updated. It's finally fixed.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Actually that was Richard Karn on Home Improvement, not Billy Mays.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well my mistake, I mean the guy had the beard and uhh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh yeah I can understand.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And the voice sounds- and the voice sounds the same...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah. They sound the same.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There's a matter of interpretation apparently I misinterpreted so I will admit that I was wrong.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah see we all make mistakes, don't be too hard on yourself.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unintelligible babble or singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you gotten any fan art submissions or notable? For the uh- webpage?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I got one today... It's like mostly a drawing of that uh that uh- of the fan herself.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -got in the snail mail today.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -Sunday.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hmmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What are you doing for this Valentine's day Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhm... I'm sorry, what was that question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What will you be doing this year on Valentine's day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm depends...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ahhh, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm.<br /><br />
Fan: Surely a man of such magnitude as yourself are going to be doing something important, aren't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Magnitude? Way to choose the words buddy.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Vocabulary talent.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, cause I don't have Julie over here yet.<br /><br />
(Reactions of OHs and AHs)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If she was here...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible) -play games.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Or we could just uh... talk.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Ehehehehe. Maybe... uh... why no redheads?<br /><br />
'''Other Woman:''' Yeah?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I was trying to think about that when the other guy asked that question. Uh... I was trying to think up that unh... mmmm... Uhhhh, redheads just don't be very- tract me so much.<br /><br />
Several: Uh, ah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's- it's- a- pi- a possibility that they're dyed.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmmmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But yeah y'know natural redheads enh, yeah, just don't really turn me on as much.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I see...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you thought about girls with um, highlights?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... (pause) aaahhhh... what turns me on hhh- (inhales) (pause) obviously the women.<br /><br />
'''Man:''' Gotta have the women. (?)<br /><br />
'''Guy''': What about piercings or tattoo?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, neither of those.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhhh-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris! How bout like non-orange hair, not like... no, never mind. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... oh... okay... hmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait Chris! How do you feel about blue hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Blue hair's okay, otherwise I wouldna- Otherwise I wouldn't've liked Sailor Mercury.<br /><br />
'''British? guy:''' That is true, she does have blue hair.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' She's a very fine character. There is no way to deny it.<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Blue hair is OFF DA HOOK!!!<br/><br />
<br />
===28:35 Chris impersonates various cartoon characters===<br />
<br />
'''British??? guy:''' Doesn't Marge Simpson have blue hair as well?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (in some kind of insane voice) Oh yeah! Marge Simpson has blue hair and it's as tall as the Empire State building!!!<br /><br />
(Some HMMs UHs and UMs follow)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yo Chris!! Can you do some impersonations for us?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Oh we'd love to hear that!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just did Marge Simpson.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah you're really talented.<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(Several people talking at once)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> -they're really good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Do another SimpsonsChris, how about Comic Book Guy?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Mmmmhmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I'm very indeed. Oh aren't we all promiscuous and whatnot. I like Batman and Robin, oh look! Stan Marsh has come into the thing again - I forget that guy's name, that guy who did the Marvel comics.<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Stan Lee. (Pause) Chris do your Donald Duck impression.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Everybody have fun (incoherent and scary quacking)<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris you should work for Disney.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's good Chris.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Have you ever considered being a voice actor?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Errrrrp... possibly, I'm not sure.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (incoherent, cut off by Chris)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent... another cartoon voice)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris, you're a Christian, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I was just wondering-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahm actu-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -do you just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm actually a Methodist church.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome, I was just wondering: Do you think AIDS was sent by god to kill the homos or do you think that it's just an accident or something man-made?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thou- the thought never occurred to me... thought never occurred to me.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' can you do an impression of Arnold Schwarzenegger?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hold- the question...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Let Chris answer the question.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thought- the thought never occurred to me about what you just said about the AIDS there mmmm... but y'know, it's a possibility and I will not agree nor disagree with it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I was just wondering I mean, I've had that discussion with some of my Christian friends. I just wanted to get your opinion, thank you.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmhhh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think (clears throat) I think Omicron has a point and you did tell me you went to a methodist church didn't you? So that's-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well th- well my Methodist church is uh more loose on- is not as strict on uh- on uh sex.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris I don't know- I don't know that much about religion in the States but I don't think there is a looser Meth- Methodist church. God makes the rules Omicron says.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, hmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well, you know personally I think that the government made AIDS to kill off all the brothers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whoa, whoa... That's what the blacks always say.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. (pause) I'm going to agree, that sounds like something that uh... well, a black guy would say.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So your church is kinda of uh- they let you do- their kinda loose on the whole moral restrictions?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... (pause) uhhh... that's... what's the question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Your church they- you said they're kind of more uh- y'know they're less strict on the whole moral thing, like, as far as sexuality goes? Right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -ah basically.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But y'know, uhh, I thought you're supposed to listen to the Bible or whatever not, y'know, not necessarily- no, never mind.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (interrupts)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, there's also a uh, there's also a- think about this uh, if you uh- if you- if you were a think uh- you have to find for yourself a good meaning behind uh- good meaning behind watching pornography to uh- like teach how it- how to do this and that when you actually get around to doing it...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's all ???<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's all's considered education for yourself.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' How is that realistic at all?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, it's uh- not a really good thing to learn from, trust me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It can be done before marriage as well as long as me and my sweetheart really love each other very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But not in Christianity.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But all I'm saying is y'know, porn is completely, completely unre- unrealistic I mean you can't really learn anything from it.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It gives- it gives you enough ideas.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unclear)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (incoherent) porn.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' When you actually have sex, it's nothing like porn.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe not like you, you not gonna do it-<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' You can't do it immediately- immediately anal sex cause most women are not very happy with anal sex and also...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay, shut up<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' -and also weird-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Shut up.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Yes.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And... that wasn't cool, like...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That was uncalled for...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, like, suthin' a BLACK MAN would say...<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' That's racist man...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, somebody said it on here first before I did.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Does that make it ok?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, I think he's trying to make it clear that- I dunno.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I typically agree with that guy.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So nothing g- it doesn't make it ok.<br /><br />
(incoherent)<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling) I wi- I'm sorry, I take it back.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(unclear)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Guys can we get back to Sonichu, Please?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah this is getting ridiculous.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unclear) -Sonichu actually.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Anyway, my question is that: why does Sonichu not wear clothes while Rosechu and the other Rosechus do wear clothes? And underwear?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Aaaaaaaaaamp... It's like uh- it's basically a cartoon and it doesn't really matter, it's like... mm... think about this: Most cartoon characters wear at least one article of clothing. At least one article. And uh- it's like Yogi Bear who just wears a necktie and a hat.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 35.14)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Other Guy:''' I think it would be cool if all the Sonichus and Rosechus got together and they and- they all formed a big team and they had special uniforms or something, kinda like the X-men.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Or Power Rangers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh yeah, I don't do- I don't do well- I'm not in- no uniforms. It's a uniform and other Sonichus and Rosechus.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'm just wondering if you'd do another impression: What does Blachu sound like? Uh, Black Sonichu? Or Blake?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eeeeuuunh... Eh... ahhhh...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Can you imitate it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... I'm not sure... uhhhhm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Like does he sound black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Possibly, but I'm not certain. I'm not leaning towards it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I'd like to hear it, but if you don't want...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just never- I just never really thought about that. I'd say that he possibly sounds similar to uh, y'know Shadow the hedgehog. But he could possibly sound, black. He could. Don't quote me on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' All right, I was just wondering if you'd do his voice but...<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Hey why does the BAD guy gotta be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never said the bad guy "has to" be black. (pause) I mean, look at the- the range of villanies, I mean there's black and whites and uh... male females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I noticed that uh- Silvana's also... black lookin'.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just decided to color her black because she was born- she came from outer space from a black egg, which was the- which came out of the rainbow.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah, I was also wonderin' about that like-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I- I- I-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' If Silvana came out of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes it's-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Why would she be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' I mean like black ain't part of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like the black sheep of the family. Y'know you put all the colors together and it does become black.<br /><br />
(unintelligible reactions)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -like a brownish-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) is a (unintelligible) color.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Maybe it's because she's from space and there's not a lot of light in space and it's dark or something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah that- a uh yeah- that's one of the-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hmmm.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhm, did you look at the link of my friend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, ummmm...<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Yeah, since you love blue hair.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh- no I haven't looked at it and I don't wanna make Julie feel jealous if I did- if I went and did.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Julie would mind.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhhh...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You look at pornography don't you?<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' (mumble)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, that- that was two syllables "Rose-chu". You don't- don't add- don't say the "e" it's just "Rosechu".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah you went over this last chat.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>(I don't know, it sounds like "narrator")<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sounds like he says "narrator" again)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh... I was just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, well, obviously the uh- the narrator who did those audio books was incorrect. Specially since I never gave that person the approval to do the audiobooks.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think it's just a fan project and I think he-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' and I think he might have one of the West coast dialects. I know that the South they say y'all but over here-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well obviously he lied-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -different. I'd be proud if they made one of my projects into an audiobook though. That means that there are a lot of fans out there that really like it.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Ay.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' They're not selling to try and make any money off it. They're not trying to rip you off. They always made sure- they always narrate the first page by saying "Christian Weston Chandler" so they're not trying to cheat you or anything.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' The people know you're making it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I- I hear that. I just, apparently they misin- misinterpreted the (audio breaks up) name Rosechu. Or mispronounced it. Misinterpreted, mispronounce- fairly the same thing in that situation... possibly. To answer that question... possibly.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uh, Vivian said that the audiobooks made Sonichu way popular that- than you could ever ever do on your own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I will not disagree with the statement. And I appreciate her help.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris. Would you be offended if a fan wrote a fanfiction about Sonichu?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Faaanfiction... if it's- if it's not demeaning or makes them look stupid. Then it's fine- it's fine. (pause) Like I did mind when, shoot, what's his name? That guy... uhhhh... that guy that the uhhhh... did the animations, on his computer.<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' You did mind or you didn't?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Animations???<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think I know what he's talking about. Are you talking about the um...<br /><br />
<br />
(background noise begins)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' Well the original play was a Greek play. Where they're all y'know... Greeks... and crazy stuff happens and they're all runnin' around in togas. So if you ever wanna see the movie "A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum" it was a classic and it had some real classic people from the 50s and 60s in it. Kinda like "It's a MAD MAD MAD MAD World". Sort of a classic old school movie from funny old school world. First color movie type thing. But that'll be a high school play. You'll wanna see that. You might actually enjoy it. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
(inaudible response)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' You never know that might be fun to do. Well I guess that wouldn't work on the weekend then... you gotta...<br /><br />
<br />
'''(FOR THOSE OF YOU WONDERING WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON, IT APPEARS THAT THERE WAS SOME TECHNICAL PROBLEM THAT CAUSED ANOTHER MUMBLE CHANNEL TO BE RECORDED WHILE THE CONVERSATION WITH CHRIS BECAME BARELY AUDIBLE BACKGROUND NOISE. INSTEAD ALL THAT CAN BE HEARD IS SOME BUTTFACE YAMMERING ABOUT FILMS AND TELEVISION SHOWS. I'M NOT GOING TO KEEP TRANSCRIBING IT. CHRIS IS STILL TALKING AND ANSWERING QUESTIONS, BUT NOTHING CAN BE UNDERSTOOD OVER THESE GUYS.)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''(AT 42.56 THE AUDIO SUDDENLY RESUMES NORMALLY)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Unknown person:''' Uh you-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I uh- noticed he's another BLACK villain.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah in real life he was black. Without meaning any offense to the uh- black guy in general, cause you've noticed, among the Jerkops there's uh- we got black's and white's, males and females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(several people jump in at once)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) -you've never drawn a female officer before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well y'know uhhh... uhhh, comic book number 7, near the end. Near the end of the time travel episode. Uhh, I have no opinion about what Obama's doing cause I don't watch the news.<br /><br />
Accented woman: But you voted for him, didn't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes I voted for him because I saw myself in him when I com- when I saw both the documentaries and downloaded them for the Playstation Network between Obama and McCain. I mean voted for a person I saw more of myself of-<br /><br />
Accented woman: You usually vote for someone based on their political leanings, not how you view them. As I were Republican, I voted for John McCain. Not because I liked him but because I- he had the same political views as me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basi- basically I'm a moderate.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh, I see. Um, I was wondering. I was reading opinions: do you agree with his financial bailouts?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm, I don't even know what it is. So I can't disagree or agree.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Well, to make it short um, it's about uh- the government- President Obama is planning to uh- a new one- (cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You got cut off there.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uhh, ok, we lost him.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yo, Chris, uh, do you, you didn't just vote for Obama cause he was black, did you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I did not vote for him because he was black. I voted for him cause I saw myse- because I saw myself in him. In like, similar lifestyles. And I saw that he was a good man, I mean after all, com- I saw- I saw I watched both of the A&E documentaries, before I can- before I knew who I would vote for.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 45.29)'''<br /><br />
<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris:, Chris what did you see in him that you say in your self?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Like for one thing we were like outcasts, at least one point in our lives.<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Wait, wait hold up earlier you said that you thought he would probably paint the white house black.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh oh that was my father’s joke he said that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Is your father a racist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but you see I drew that for him before I saw the documentaries so respectfully withdrew that comic page.<br /><br />
'''???:''' does your father hate black people.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Not necessarily but it’s just how my father just how my father that does not reflect in any way that’s how he felt (annoying ass noise in the background)<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Man that racist.<br /><br />
'''??? :''' Hey Chris I so the ahh saw the Sonichu and Rosechu love sack that you put up and I thought if was pretty cool for (you adult friends?) I just had a question though: do you have any plans in the comic to have romance between you and one of the hedgehogs I mean-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Yelling) No no no<br /><br />
'''???:''' -we would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' I mean is was just wondering because there are fans how would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Now- now that you answered the his question my kind of relates to his what are your thoughts on inter racial breeding and marriages?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would not agree of disagree with them but in my personal preference I would fell- I would feel more comfortable in having a full relationship with a white woman but I am willing- am still willing to be friends and acquaintances and give and have respect for the black women as well.<br /><br />
'''???:''' What about Asians like Japanese?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I’m ok with them as well (yelling) a once.<br /><br />
'''???:''' So would you get married with a Japanese woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hhhmmmm I would have, yes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> but I’m giving Julie to opportunity here.<br /><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: Julie’s a lucky woman.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris, I was just wondering, is Silvana gonna become one of the good guys, like- like Black Sonichu did before?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There’s a possibility but I have not given that a co- I have not confirmed that yet.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Uh, is she gonna lose the male sexual parts and become a full-fledged woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhhmmm possibly but I haven’t given that- I haven't given that thought either.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Also um I was reading (?Phillip’s?) question, Chris what did you want to be when you were little?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don’t remember, I do not remember. I’m just making it as I go basically.<br /><br />
'''???:''' is there ever gonna be like uh, an end to your sonichu series like a finale?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hmmmm I don’t know, probably would not.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Oh so it keeps going and going?<br /><br />
???: You ever consider making comic about the history of CWCville?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhmmmm an episode dedicated towards that possibility.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris are you going to keep the name changes that you made or are you going back to the original names?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahhh ya I’m keeping the name changes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' But you know umm Nintendo was umm, y'know, they sent you a letter you never really talk about it further.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but at least- at least- the hel- they use to benefit me for the fact that uh allowed me to fix noting in that sense so I couldn’t be sued by such people in that sense.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 50 min)'''<br /><br />
<br />
(scattered reactions)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So the name changes were good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So uh, Chris I was wondering if uh Mary- Mary Lee Walsh Or I guess the new name: Ryam Sla- I don't know-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Sla-weel.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Slaweel, thank you. Uhm, if she were to use her magic to curse Rosechu with a penis, would Soni- what- wou- would that test the relationship between Sonichu and her? While they were fighting the battle to have it removed, I'm just curious.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... Firstly uh, she does not- she does not have the power ch- to do that.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I just thought you know, remember you did the story about 4-cent-garbage and drawing all the- the picture and-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah you what, that's one- that's one thing: drawing them, but not actually putting them on the character.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Cause I think that would be like an epic story though, like to actually have a quest-<br /><br />
Fan: I'll second that.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -to go to have that penis removed from Rosechu. I mean it's a test of romance between her and Sonichu.<br /><br />
(muttering)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And when that prevails and the penis is removed and everybody- everybody lives happily ever after. Y'know that would be awesome.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnnnnnh, I dunno I have to- I dunno I have to think about that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It is a really good idea. I like it.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I do too.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah, that's good.<br /><br />
Other fan: It could show just how much Rosechu means to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I'll- I'll consider it but I'm not making any promises.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' We understand.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(several talking at once)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -decided on that subject?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm working on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' If you actually decide to go forward with that story? Do you think maybe- maybe you could give her a talking penis?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!!!<br /><br />
(laughter from various people)<br /><br />
(unintelligible responses)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ok, I think- I think we've talked enough about that one guys.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I have a question that doesn't involve penises.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Anyway, my question is since we've been hearing lot of vicious lies and slander about this, could you confirm exactly why you've been fired from your job at Wendy's Chris? Cause we've been hearing all sorts of- of crazy things and we wanna know the truth.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmmmmmm... well, firstly, what have you heard?<br /><br />
'''Other guy:'''Well we heard that uh you... we've heard so many things like you helped a small child and you did a Donald Duck impersonation and you scared the child.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... also that- also that is correct but I did not scare the child. The child was tired, I was only trying ta- I was only trying to make the child feel better. That's a little amusement. But I did not make the child cry, the child was already- was just tired.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' So you didn't help them cut their food and... yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I did help them- help them get their food to- by giving them uhh, by giving them bags and a top for their baked potato boat.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris, when will um, the pictures of Zapina, appear on the um, 18 plus page?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that was a deleted scene! That was a deleted scene.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Why was it deleted?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basically, hhh... y'c- y'cant' really have it if you don't have Rosechu working to take the- working to take the pictures of herself up in the bathroom. Cause like can't have one without the other.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaahhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I don't know if this is a good question but there's something I wonder about that- we kind of have this DVD you made and... y'know, we never unfortunately got... but I'm curious um... do you ever plan to release it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I'd pay money for that, I think everyone else here would probably pay money for it too.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Indeed.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (breaking up) I wanna ask a question.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I hear it's also on YouTube.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris do you know that you've influenced the rap/hip hop community?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmh... uh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I just wanted to mention that because I saw some YouTube videos and it- and- and from some underground hip hop artists such as Immortal Technique and they've sampled some of your voice audio complaining about your struggles with uhm... with the school board, with the security guards and they were- they felt so empowered that they actually took those words and mad'em into a very powerful rap song. How does that- how is your reaction to that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhhhh... basically I have not watched those videos so... I don't have an opinion.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I will provide you a link to that, hold on a moment.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh that's ok, actually I uh, did sample one. The one where they basically played the parody from "Can't touch this".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, no, trust me it's waaay more serious than that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I still haven't heard of- heard of what you're talking about.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Nevermind.<br /><br />
(rustling and moving noises)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do an impression of MC Hammer?<br /><br />
(more clicking and rustling)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Can't touch this do do do doo do dooo Can't touch this! Do do do dooo do do do... can't touch this.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' That was- heheheh.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Awesome.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you- can you do Dr. Nick Riviera from the Simpsons?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> HIIII EVERYBODY!<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hello Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hi Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hi Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that should say Dr. Nick cause that's who I'm imitatin'.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''???:''' That uh-<br /><br />
'''???:''' HELLOOO EV'RYBODY!!!!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well that-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hi Dr. Nick!<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Thank you, I love the Simpsons.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do... Peter from Family Guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhenhenhenh... Hey Lois! Look at me! I'm just (unclear) you nose, and I'm eatin' your nose.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh that's dead on.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Oh would you- Omicron's been interested in tis- would you actually make a documentary like- like your other DVD but make your daily life?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... I'm... yeah I might but uh... I'm not su- I'm not sure bout it at the moment.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaaaaaaanh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris can you do Mario? You know from Super Mario?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hay paisano! How you doin' mistah hedgehog!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's very good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then Sonic- then Sonic would say "what?!?"<br /><br />
(giggling)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris do you have any plans to make a video of yourself taking a dump on a Hexbox?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No! That's gross.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Yeah that was pretty sick right there.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Let's ban him.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's bad enough I cut in half with an axe.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> and one of the elevator jokes...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Oh we remember that, that was a classic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And I earned a trophy for that.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmm...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Yeah, I remember that, it was destroying a Hexbox by cutting it in half if I remember...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' If I were to draw nude Zapina fanart, uhm, would you put them on the site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... uhh, your- you uh- free to draw them at your- at your own- own preference, but I will not be- I will not put it on the website because- cause- because I will not want to break any laws of having underage portrayals- portrayals of underage nudity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Isn't Dot a child?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry... what?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dot, from Animaniacs.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' So-uh- uhm- I think I looked up somewhere that um, drawings do not count, they're just lines on paper not like real pictures that are horrible.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah I believe-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Draw-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (cut off)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Those illustrations do not count as child pornography. Because with drawing it's art- it's artistic merit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Welll... I dunno, I guess it depends I have to- but- y'know you could do the drawing and I'll think- I'll consider it.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, would it be possible to get any pictures of Sonichu having anal sex with Rosechu?<br /><br />
(pause... thumps and feedback)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm considering that but...<br /><br />
'''Accented woman''' Who keeps letting this person in? You are very offensive.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -and and, if you draw those, do you think that Rosechu would actually clean Sonichu's penis off with her mouth (laugh) w-when they're done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nah, no, I don't think so, I think- I think- I think it would be unh- yeah w-wash it off with a washcloth.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Do you think then, at that point then they would sell the washcloth on eBay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!<br /><br />
(people talking over each other)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, no, no more potty humor, all right?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah alright, okay<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Unrelated to party humor, I want to ask that in your Springbreak uhh Issue of Sonichu you had an introduction of a, of new character, the [[Yawning Squirtle|squirtle]] and I wanna ask<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:''' (interrupting)</span> No, that's, no, no, no, that's not just a character, I was, I was not introducing a new character, I was just doing like a poster thing for a bubble speak under one, I thought I just draw some water type pokemon un-in there<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I understand but the thing is there is huge cult following for that character and I strongly suggest that you should capalize on that and, and make him to a main character<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eh... No, I don't think so<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's just sleeping Squirtle work- waking up!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, people just thought he was really cute and yawning Squirtle, I don't know, I heard someone say, man wouldn't it be great if he would be that [[Autistic|dopey]] sidekick that he'd come and they'd be like, like, he'd come in and say something silly after someone did something and they would be like "Squirtle"!<br /><br />
People laughing and talking over each other<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um...<br /><br />
???: Yo, it makes you *unintelligible* (Chris and someone talk over another)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yes Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I'm asking you about... Hm... Never mind, I lost my train of thought. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's okay. These guys made me lose a train of thought as well. Doesn't multiple inputs.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yes, kinda lotta control here. I might- I may have to... never mind<br /><br />
Silence<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I never lose my train of thought because I have a GPS tracking system on it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, that was a good joke. (chuckle)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, could you tell us a joke right now. Just any joke.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay, here is a fuck- here is a funny- here is a funny mind scream. Funny rhyme scheme... not to be taken literally:<br /><br />
On your Game Boy Advance SP<br /><br />
create 'yer MII<br /><br />
den play it on WII<br /><br />
with your PSP<br /><br />
hooked to your PS3<br /><br />
cause it's fun<br /><br />
see?<br /><br />
And never ff, and never play a [[Hex Box]] 360<br /><br />
Because it's stupid and you're not a dummy (in childlike voice)<br /><br />
Mock laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That is really good.<br />
'''Fan''': Chris is that something you made up?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I made that up.<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Chris, Chris, can I write that down and tribute to quote you that? Oh man, that's good<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) So you mean to type it up and you quote me on the rhyme scheme?<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Yeah, I'd like that. I've been thinking about making a quote book like a mini Chris quote book like something you could open and have a cool line to say when you're on a party and you're like right things.<br /><br />
People talking over Chris and Alucard<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, well I'm typing it up for Alucard, so...<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Thank you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, can we hear one more?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay well here, okay um, okay here is an [[Christian's sex joke|adult joke]] I once come up with a long time ago.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': This is going to be good!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright- Alright there's this married couple, Bob and Jane, and they've been- they were looking forward to having children. So, one night, Bob comes home from work, and uh Jane says, "Hi, you had a good day, dear?" And he sa- and she sa-- he says, "Nah, it's been a long day, darling" And she said, "Well, it's okay, why don't we go upstairs, and we'll have some Breakfast." And he says, "Breakfast, at Nine p.m.?" And she says, "Sure, you bring the MILK, and I'll get an EGG."<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yo, I heard that before, man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then later, they had a boy and a girl, Junior Bacon and Orange Juice. All Part of a Balanced Breakfast.<br /><br />
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif]]<br /><br />
Perplexed silence<br />
<br />
'''Fan''': Hey, Chris, how do you solve a Mexican tank?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Stand in front of it?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': No, man, shoot the guys pushing at it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fans''': Oh that's a good one.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' I got one.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get a bunch of [[Niggos|blacks]] in a car?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Throw some chicken in.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get them out of the car?<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Job application.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What do you call a beach of black people buried up to their necks?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Afro-turf.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I came up with one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what's the difference between a black man and a pizza?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': A pizza can feed a family of four.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': How do you stop black people from jumping on a bed?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, enough racist jokes.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Put velcro on the ceiling.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enough, enough black jokes.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, uh Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Sorry<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I showed by friend that over 18 site, and he said, that he um, he um, you know he, he masturbated to it. Does that make you feel (interrupted)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's good, that's basically the reaction I would be going for. Among the male ca... among the male population, being attracted to the women.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But those are your drawings, it's like, I think he's gay now. I mean, you're a guy and you drew those.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm drawing, I'm drawing female characters.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yah, but it's drawn by you and you're, like, I don't know. It's kind of awkward for me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris, I actually need to thank you, the pictures on that site, it looked like the camera was inside Sonichu's penis when Rosechu was giving him a blowjob. That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. I've always wanted to have a camera in my penis so that I could see that if I ever got a blowjob, that would be awesome, I just wanted to say thank you very much for that perspective. It's the first time I've ever seen it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': There's a question here on the site, oh sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, well I see it... no I don't basically masturbate to my own drawings.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But you're okay if other people do, right? Even guys?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You're okay if other people, you know, masturbate to your drawings? Even if they're guys, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If the guys are masturbating to the female drawings, then yes, that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I just thought it was kind of awkward, but maybe I'm seeing it a different way.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I doubt that, uh, having a whole bunch of drawings of naked female characters can be misinterpreted as something else.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Can I to ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': One time, a friend and I were looking at porn together, and we masturbated together, but the porn was straight, ordinary porn. Is this gay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I'm sorry, where you looking at naked women?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Yes, but we were in the same room, masturbating.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, if you both were thinking about the naked women you were looking at, then I would definitely say you both are straight, cuss you're not thinking about each other, you're thinking about the women.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Right. <br /><br />
'''Fan''': Would you do that with someone?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': I'm relieved.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Man, nigger you gay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Shut up. Would you do that with someone? Like a guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Nah, I'm straight dog.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I'd, yeah I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Omnicron has a question on here, on the side here.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You see it, or?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. That's not straight.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what about the earlier question.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, the one before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, which one before? Oh, you mean...<br /><br />
(All talk at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, what do you think about-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wait, wait let him answer.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Let him answer that one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was gonna rephrase it but okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'd say it would depend on your interpretation, what is adultery to you?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But, you know, isn't the Bible only supposed to be interpreted, it's the word of God, you're not really supposed to interpret it any other way.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': It is what it is.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's in English.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh, I have no comment.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, that's what my, uh, you know I was talking about my mom saw those drawings. I mean, not the drawings, the posters, the playboy posters and that's basically what she got bad about. She said I was committing adultery.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah okay, if you don't want to talk about it, fine.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, hmmm, I think you shou, I think you should, uh, when you, I think I can see where this could be interpreted one way or another, it depends on how you look at the woman. I mean, alright, you're looking at the, uh woman, you might imagine her naked, but, I mean, you would respe- I mean, you would, you would still respect, I mean, if you were still respecting that woman, you would appreciate her more for like who she was aside or in addition to the nudity, then that's not as bad as just, as just only doing it for the appearance.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's why, uh, that's why the playboy magazines, they give you the introductions of the women. It's like letting you know who they are (unintelligible).<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh but, yeah, but there weren't any, uh, descriptions under the, yeah never mind.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Thank you for the clarification Chris.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris, do you love America?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm patriotic.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's good. I was wondering if you could sing the national anthem for us?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [[Wikipedia:My Country, 'Tis of Thee| My country tis' of thee. Sweet land of liberty. Of thee, of thee I sing.]] I don't remember the rest.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Lands where my fathers died.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Land of the pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
(Fans all start singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Stop it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey I'll, I'll tell y'all a funny joke that's kind of patriotic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, you got this, you got this funny Mexican- you got this funny Mexican guy, and he just, he just come back home to Meh-he-co after an American visit. He's like (high pitched voice) Oh the people there are so very friendly. I mean, I go to the basketball game. I sit in the back row. I sit in the back row. And then, and then, and then all of a su- and then all of the sudden right before the game started, everyone turned around, put their hands on their chests, and they say, "Oh say can you seeeeee"!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I thought you said no racist jokes?<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': Yeah man, that ain't cool!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was a name, it was a name joke.<br /><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''':...Spanish language<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm kind of offended by that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': That's racist dog. That ain't cool.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': You laugh you support terrorism.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ¿Qué?<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What'd you say?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What the hell? Who said that?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Forget it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I said, you laugh, you support terrorism.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, he's gone.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Awful Mr. T impression) I pity the fool, who try and misinterpret things, and twist them around, and then jam new words into my mouth.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You do a good Mr. T<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah you do.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) no jibber jabber.<br /><br />
(Fans laugh)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, did you watch the A-team back in the day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No but, no but, basica- but I have seen Mr. T. And then I also, I also saw when he guest, when he quest starred in an episode of Alvin and the Chipmunks.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I saw that episode, he helped uh Theodore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Theodore was getting picked on, yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, you posted a link here.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well at my [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|Methodist church]], uh, sex before marriage is okay as long as, uh, she and I, we love each other very much and truly.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But that's what they tell you, I'm talking about the word of God.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *Sigh* Okay, I'm getting tired, okay, I'm getting tired here, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, but...<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, sorry, no more of that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, you're right. Please stay Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay. Alright, I'll stay a little while longer.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, if anyone does, if anyone asks anything that makes him feel uncomfortable, I'm gonna kick you out of the room.<br /><br />
(Everyone speaks)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Chris, could you give me some advice?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I have a Japanese friend, he's, he's actually 26 and he's never had a girlfriend and we asked him some questions, just joking around one day. And we asked him if his, when he gets married, if his wife wanted to sleep with another man, would he be okay with it, and he actually said yes, as long as she wasn't being forced. Now that kind of bothered us, because us Americans, right, we think that marriage, and you know you're with somebody, they should be faithful, but he doesn't seem to think so, so I wanted to see if you had any advice maybe on what we could do to try and convince him that his viewpoint is wrong.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, hmm, it's not necessarily that the viewpoint is wrong. See, the thing is, what, to, to quote, to make it accepta- to make it like as if you're actually cheating on somebody, cheating on your spouse in the marriage, it's like not telling them, not telling him, not telling him or her about it beforehand, but it's like, you know, you, it's like you tell them beforehand and you get their approval, it's, it's okay, even if they don't want to be part of it. But not telling them, that's definitely like uh, cheating on them.<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that's another thing I would have to think about, cause, got a bit of a, couple of items of destruction that need to be repaired<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I just got, I just talked to that one friend I was talking about who, uh, saw your website, the 18 one, and it turns out he's, he's gay, he's actually gay and he fapped to, uh I mean he masturbated to, uh, Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hahaha, your friend's a fag.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': And I think he's...<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out for 15 seconds)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ...about that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I think in case you would definitely want to let him know that you are straight and you don't want that kind of relationship, and maybe, and you know<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I tell him just to get the hell away from your site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm not saying that, but like, uh, you know, you don't want that kind, you don't, I mean that's, that's basically confirmed on that note. So, uh, you want, you still wanna be friends but you don't, but you're not into that kind of thing.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I mean, he was looking at your site, like, the 18 site and he was in like, um-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Over 18.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': The over 18 site you made. The loveshack. I thought he was just like, you know, masturbating to Rosechu, but it turns out he was attracted to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *sigh* Uhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, I don't think I'll be friends with this guy anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, yeah, then tell him, yeah, to get the hell out of your house and stay away if you don't want to be friends anymore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Seems like you know too many gay friends mister.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh shut up.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris, you know how-<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's not my fault. <br /><br />
'''Another fan''': You know how cologne or perfume, you know, women wear that to try and attract men? Do you think that farts attract gay guys to each other?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Now that's stupid! Not only is that stupid, but it's gross.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Here, I'm gonna take that question and I'm gonna, I'm gonna take that question and spin that into something that's less weird. What would you say the best cologne or whatever a guy could wear to get a girl's attention?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I recommend [[Axe|Axe]] body spray.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh yeah? I think I tried that one time.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': That actually does it for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What scent do you use?<br /><br />
(All speak)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Don't you use ass body spray?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Mmm, love it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Does the Axe effect, does it really exist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Does Axe exist?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, the Axe effect. You know, they say in the commercials spray it and girls will come to you.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) and it works for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Has it worked for you Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, well, yeah, I, yeah I haven't got that working for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I think it's a scam personally.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I mean... I mean, Old Spice is pretty good. I had, I had like a couple of girls go up to me asking me for dates with Old Spice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I actually wore that Orion sent, uhh, still smelling it. So it will work Chris, you just gotta give it time.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Using the Axe.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Cameron but, isn't Axe spray for men?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': No no no no no no no, see, see I said a boyfriend, a boyfriend that I met.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, okay.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah. *laughs*<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That makes sense.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, silly, silly. I have a question for you Chris, what celebrities have you met?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Well what I'm saying is the Axe effect doesn't work. Okay, sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't actually met other celebrities in person, my real life, unless you count a local radio DJ.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I've met the DJ of my radio station 95.1 and [[Excel Saga|Monica Rial]], and meeting Monica Rial was just a treat.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ahhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was, it was good.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, she's pretty.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Maybe you should go to her and, um, maybe she could be like a contact for voice acting. I mean, you do pretty good imitations.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Do Homer Simpson!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Homer Simpson impression) Oh, look at me! I'm a stupid old person, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp, D'OH!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That was awesome<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Who else can you do Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What other imitations can you do?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, a lot. It depends on if you name it, I might recall, if you name the person or character I'll, if I can recall my memory than I will imitate that person.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Can you try Bender from Futurama?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I reckon I can do a pretty good Bender! I can twist off my arm and, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, um, since my girlfr-(clears throat)-sorry. Since my girlfriend broke up with me, I was just wondering if you could give me any tips to like, pick up y'know, another girlfriend?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) Valentine's Day is coming.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah. It's gonna be lonely without her, y'know.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah I know.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Can you help?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) No I do not know what tha- neither of them sound like in voices so I can't imitate them. (sigh) As for- as for dating advice uh, if you're- when you're going out to meet a woman, and this is like advice that's like it could've been taken from my, taken from my own advice I gave in the, the one in the video I did when I just turned 25. But it was definitely, it was given, but it was offered in this book written by a nine-year-old.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> When you're going to uh find yourself a woman, you just try to stay calm. And uh be polite, friendly. Don't uh let your nerves get the best of ya.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What should I say, what should I say here, y'know, to the girl?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Start with "hello" and "how are you".<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I ask her, should I like do a pick-up line? Do those work?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Um, sometimes. But I wouldn't, I wouldn't exactly count on it in a desperate situation. But I mean like uh, talk about yourself a little bit saying like, "Ooh did you read in the paper today about this article that really caught my eye?"<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was thinking about standing by the wall with [[Attraction Sign|a sign]]. Saying that I need a girlfriend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, don't- don't do that. That makes you look retarded.<br /><br />
(Laughter)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What about wearing a sticker that says you're single. Have you ever tried that? Do you think that would work?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what was that? A stick-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wearing like a uh, a sticker that says "I'm single".<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Wait a second I'm not done yet.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Oh I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I got that idea from your comic. I mean I thought it was a-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. I later learned that that, I already learned from my mother that made me look retarded. (Female fan laughs) To other people, so...<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Ohh. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So I stop- So I stopped- So I stopped doing that a long time ago and, I don't know (what payed attention?)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mm. Basically I'm running from others that have offered such advice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh yeah like John Tesh I remember that in your news dash.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. And also it's like uh there's an expression in my elementary somewhere uh, those who can't teach.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Um, I remember (unintelligible). Um, I was um, looking at um (something), how do you feel about Obama swearing in his book? Even read it out loud in the audiobook version.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hm. (rustling and typing in the background) Hm. Ah, yeah I heard of that, didn't care much, didn't uh give much thought into it so... Uh swearing yeah don't care much for it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': So Chris I was just wondering uh, like can you hear me?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I can hear you.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Uhh. Does wearing that medallion, does that attract females? I was thinking about making my own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) You could do what you want, to try and make yourself stand out. Um... But it depends on if you, it depends on other peoples' point of uh you I guess at this point, um... You might want to get a second opinion. I mean it's not like I can see you over da Mumble and uh say what makes you look okay and what makes you look NOT okay. Yeah, g- get a second opinion from somebody else in person.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What about you, do you think that medallion makes you look, y'know, more attractive to girls?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhmmm. Yeah. Yeah I don't know. I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah I think it looks pretty cool on you. So that's, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well you could try it, see if you could try and see if it works for ya.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Speaking, speaking of the medallion, I noticed you wear it on the outside. Have you ever done any replacing the chain on it to something a little more comfortable?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh no. It's fine. It's fine. I mean I'd say that this uh the necklace chain with the like a pair- like a pair of- like a pair of keyrings with a belt buckle on them.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm. Alright.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris in hentai, the uh guys- like the girls usually say no but the, the guy touches her a bit and she gets into it. I was just wondering if you think that really works, have you ever tried that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh. I'm sorry, could you repeat that?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': I said in hentai, y'know the Japanese um, kinda pornography-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Yeah-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': -usually, the, the girl kind of says no but then the guy starts touching her boobs or something and she gets real excited and gets into it. I was just wondering if you think that really works. Can you just make a girl excited and into you just like t hat?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhh... Yeah I don't think so. I me- I mean in most of the time I'm sure you would probably just, the girl would probably just turn around and slap you right in the face or kick you in the groin.<br /><br />
(Various pained groans)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, you were saying it's educational. I think I saw that in a porn too.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Uh. Also (unintelligible) asked "How far have you gotten with a girl"?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I've never even been on a first date in my lifetime.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ohhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> At this point.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris?<br /><br />
(Fans talk over each other)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I was suggesting uh Chris, I have family in Bristow, Virginia. I've been out there a lot. And you know, they're- I mean, people that I've seen in Virginia don't really like anime and things that much. Have you ever considered maybe trying to meet a girl in the west coast? Because a lot of people, especially universities are into anime culture. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) Yeah but I'm no- I'm not planning on traveling outside of my state. Plus I would prefer to keep it local.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah.<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
(Everyone talks over each other)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but to see the world means to have to have the money to actually go see the world.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Well You just have to save up a little bit.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah. I mean you know, trains are good.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': (strange incognizable noise)<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Gas is cheap now.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': You can meet so many people just going on a road trip or just you know, taking the bus or something I mean it's not too expensive, it's cheaper than a plane- (Chris talks over him)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Yeah, I hear you on that. But I just like, you know, if I want to go on a road trip I'd uh, I would not like to go it alone. I'd like to have my sweetheart by my side.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Mmm.<br><br />
'''Fan''': The point is you could always get a job. That's what I did once a-(cut off)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh.<br><br />
(Fans talk over each other)<br><br />
'''Other fan''': -and I wanted to meet a girl? I got this t-shirt that says "ask me about my large and attractive penis" and I wear that to the mall and it works every time.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Are you kidding, really?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yes. (cut off)<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Well that's interesting. (laughs) I have to meet you some time. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah boy. Uhh, alright, gentleman's clubs um...<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what was that noise just now?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Noise?<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I heard like a (snorts) noise.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Yeah, that was probably me be- because I was like objecting to the uh, when he was describing what it said on his t-shirt.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah that wasn't cool. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': You guys have no taste. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah-<br><br />
'''Guy''': Disgusting!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I know.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay um. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>But it just uh, just it m- just ma- I mean the way I see it, see somebody else wearing that it makes, it uh, it makes- it s- it would appear that guy is only looking for sex and women would be turned by sh- sh- sex right away at that point.<br><br />
'''Guy''': Yeah it kinda sums up (cut off)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Um, so...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um... (Chris and Fan talk over each other) Yeah let me answer this guy's question. Yeah I don't know much about gentleman's clubs so I can't really answer that question. A, and uh... <br><br />
'''Fan''': What about you though, like when you're looking for a girl, does like sex really matter? Like, to attractiveness?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, er, yeah. Eventually the se- yeah. Attractiveness does matter in one point of view but uh, but if you think about it it's like you want to get to know the person, the woman inside as well. Um, so, (I'd rather be in it?) so like uh, we were very close to each other emotionally and like friends, then the sex. Like uh, how Panda and I were very... close.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Hmm.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': What happened to Panda?<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah what happened to her?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't heard fermer- I haven't heard from her in over two weeks and then recently there were, there was the fires in Australia close to by where she was. So I don't know whether she's still alive or not. I haven't heard from her in over a coupl- over two weeks.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': That's awful.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah. I heard it was real bad, it was like a hundred and eight people died from those fires.<br><br />
'''Black fan''': Daaaamn!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but you know it's okay that at least I have uh, at least I have uh, at least I have a good woman who w- who's willing to uh be at my side at this point.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Man... Uh-<br><br />
(Multiple people talk at once)<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': -for the people who are dead?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': So you feel no remorse for the people who have died in Australia?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh no no, I DO feel remorse. Especially to Sarah sh- eh- I mean... I worry about her she's still ali- I worry about- I'm concerned if she's actually dead or still alive.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah I'm sorry to hear that.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I me- I mean, I mean I'd li- I mean I pray every day that she's still alive safe and well. And that she contact me soon.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': But you... you automatically, you basically abandoned her for Julie.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But I did not basically abandon her for Julie.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': That is what it appear- seems like.<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh)...(sigh)<br><br />
'''Fan''': She could be still alive, you never know.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Even if she isn't still alive, take solace in the fact with her perfectly barbequed remains fed to survivors.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> SHUT UP!!!<br><br />
'''Fan''': Um, that was too far, you're going too far man.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. And at this point I care about both- I care about of uh both of them equally. Both uh Sarah and Julie. But it's like, it's like you know uh, I'm uh stil- if she let's me- if she uh gets in contact with me, letting me know that she's still alive, and uhh she...<br><br />
'''Fan''': But I'm letting you know Julie, if she's still alive what are you gonna do then?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': And if people actually did eat her what would you do to them?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> OH SHUT UP!!!! Kick that guy out!<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
(laughter in background)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay um. Uh...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, but you know in all seriousness if Sarah gets in contact with me and lets me know she's gonna be coming my way in real life, and uh-<br><br />
'''Fan''': You're not gonna dump Julie are you?<br><br />
(uneasy pause)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I wouldn't dump Julie as a friend.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh but! Oh...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie I still, Julie I still love you.<br><br />
'''Late guy''': Hello everyone.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But you told me I was your sweetheart, didn't you?<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh hello, Doctor.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm. (stress sigh) Julie I'm going through a- I'm going through a transition right now so it's kind of hard for me to make uh, short watch of what I say at points and y'know answering these kind of questions.<br><br />
'''Fan''': I'm sorry uh, I don't mean to offend you or anything. Well I was just wondering-<br><br />
'''Guy''': (unintelligible) guy Chris. <br><br />
'''Other guy''': Uncalled for. <br><br />
'''Black fan''': Y'know what, don't worry about Sarah. Cause, y'know it usually takes like, like months for a person, like a victim of a fire or a flood of some crap like that, to y'know find shelter and then phone and internet and all that.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': You know, if the place is in a state of emergency, people are getting moved around all over the place, there's people in the hospital, I'm sure she's fine she just can't y'know talk to anyone.<br><br />
'''Guy''': What about Alucard's question?<br><br />
'''Fan''': Wait, yeah.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) Uh, I can't answer that question.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm?<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Why not?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because I'm still in a transition right- I'm still in a transition from Sarah to Julie at this point so uh I can't answer that question right now cause I wouldn't know how to answer it.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': It seems-<br><br />
'''Guy''': So you "transition"?<br><br />
'''Fan''': It's a hard choice, I can't blame you I mean, yeah.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I mean you know what, that's- that's a flat out bad question, I mean I would- I'd be able-<br><br />
'''Other guy''': It's quite valid.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (aggravated) Auuuughh! Okay now I'm gettin' uh, okay now my head's out of order.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Oh.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': I've had that problem too.<br><br />
'''Guy''': It's never fun.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay forget it then.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Uh okay I got, I got one. Impressions, impressions! Uh, can you do one of Bill Clinton?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... no.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Um, Chris? Do you-<br><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh)<br><br />
'''Other guy''': I was wondering do you watch the Boondocks on Adult Swim?<br><br />
'''Black fan''': Aw yeah that's my show!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I've watched the Boondocks.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Did you enjoy it?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's alright.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Can you do any imitations of the characters there, like Uncle Ruckus?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent gibberish) -dem niggers over there! Sing along if you know the words to that song I just made up.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': What was that?<br><br />
'''Guy''': That was, wait, what?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That was Uncle Ruckus. Well I'll tell ya what I sell propane and propane accessories all day long! (begins a high-pitched cackling and squeals more gibberish)... That was-<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Could you do Meowth from Pokemon?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Meowth!<br><br />
'''Fan''': The talking Meowth.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Meowth! ... (cackles again) Aye Jessie, James, we gotta go snag that Pikachu again!<br><br />
'''British guy''': Do you know how to do the Team Rocket song?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, the Team Rocket song er, do you mean the motto?<br><br />
'''British guy''': Myes the motto, the classic one.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Hmmmm... Prepare for trouble make it double, to protect the world from devastation, to uni- to unite all people- o- (sigh)...<br><br />
'''Guy''': ...in our nation!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mm. Anyway... (sigh) Hang on I'm a little mixed up here. Prepare for trouble make it double, to protect the world from devastation, to unite all people within our nation, to debi- to debide(sic) the evils of truth and love, to extend our reach to the stars above. Team Rocket blast off to the speed of light, surrender now or prepare to fight.<br><br />
'''Guy''': ... Meowth, that's right.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': That's right!<br><br />
(chuckling)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Now hand over the Pikachu!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. (sigh)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Oh come on-<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': -than Sonichu, because Sonichu is obviously more powerful than Pikachu!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I will not hand over the Sonichu, so there. (pause) Alucard, stop asking the questions please?<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': Yes Alucard you are very annoying.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah someone kick him out.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br><br />
'''Guy''': Good goin' Canine.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
'''Canine''': Anytime. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm. Actually I'm k- actually I'm kind of tired now uh... I'm gonna- I'm gonna head on down now but y'know I'll come back another night.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Okay.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': Well thanks for coming Chris, we really appreciate it.<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: No. I've got a few questions for you Chris, I've been waiting.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Clyde no, no, no.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': How did he get in here?<br><br />
(Everyone yells over each other)<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: It's important!<br><br />
'''Guy''': Ohh he leeeft!<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: No, no, shut up, shut up-<br><br />
'''Other guy''': He's not coming back, give up.<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: Tell him it's important it's about Panda!<br><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm digesting her right now.<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: That will get him back in, I know it.<br><br />
'''Guy''': What's the important news?<br><br />
<br />
[End recording]<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Transcription}}<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 6|Mumble Chat 6]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 8|Mumble Chat 8]]|}}<br />
<br />
==Links==<br />
* [https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBWklfakp0TGdDSkU Download]<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
<br />
[[Christian's sex joke]] - Used during this chat.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_7&diff=163102Mumble 72012-09-29T16:57:57Z<p>Irisviel: </p>
<hr />
<div>'''Mumble 7''' is the seventh of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]], held on 13 [[February 2009]].<br />
<br />
Appears to be the genesis for the "Power" videos in which Chris attempts and fails to prove his [[I AM STRONG|strength]] and [[CWC Fighter|fighting]] [[Challenge For Clyde|skill]], though these would not materialize for several months.<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
* A fan talks to Chris about putting naked posters of girls and pictures of men up in his room up to find out if his friend was a [[homo]] as Chris suggested. He tells Chris that his girlfriend dumped him over the posters and his friend ignored all of them. Chris sees nothing wrong with his advice until Julie tells him that she wouldn't like that. Chris recommends sending an anonymous letter explaining the situation and utterly fails to apologize or show concern.<br />
* Fans point out that Chris shouldn't have to show and prove that he is straight.<br />
* Chris cuts a fan off to let Julie ask a question involving [[pedofork|shota]].<br />
* Fans ask Chris to turn his radio down.<br />
* Chris uses Wal-Mart printer paper & RSVP ballpoint pen to draw, and a 50-pack of Crayola markers to color. Refuses to use color pencils or Photoshop to color, saying he prefers the markers.<br />
* Chris talks about Omicron's redone version of [[Sonichu]], accusing him of plagiarism. Says that the difference between what Omicron is doing and what he is doing is that Sonichu is his. Agrees to let Omicron continue if he credits Chris with the copyright.<br />
* '''Julie is convincing Chris to make videos proving to Clyde how strong he is.''' Chris feels that the [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|dildo breaking video]] proved this. Fans say that Chris's dildo comes apart naturally for cleaning.<br />
* '''A fan recommends making a video showing off his fighting moves to scare Clyde.'''<br />
* Chris is asked why he would use a dildo in proving that he is straight. Chris says that he is straight for crushing it, fans call him a [[homo]] for keeping it.<br />
* Chris [[lie|denies]] [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|using the dildo]], and claims that it's now broken. Fan says it could easily be reassembled. Chris is adamant that it was glued and that it took a lot of strength to pull it apart.<br />
* When asked by Julie, '''Chris admits using super-shears from Cutco to break the dildo glue, claiming to use a lot of strength in the process'''.<br />
* Fans discuss [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]]. Chris insists that it was drawn in protest of [[ED]]. He says it was anonymous, as most women have long brown hair and her eyes were censored.<br />
* Insists that [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:AngelicainGod%27sEyes.JPG the Rule 34 of Angelica Rosechu] is masturbating and enjoying it, and is using her hand to do it.<br />
* Chris thinks Billy Mays is on Home Improvement.<br />
* Chris isn't doing anything on Valentine's Day, as Julie is not there yet.<br />
* Chris discusses the the No-Redheads policy in his [[Love Quest]]. Says that redheads don't attract him unless they are not natural redheads. No piercings or tattoos allowed.<br />
* Chris is OK with blue hair.<br />
* Does a terrible Marge Simpson impersonation.<br />
* Chris impersonates Comic Book Guy and Donald Duck.<br />
* A fan presents the possibility that AIDS was sent by God to kill the [[homos]].<br />
* [[Chris and Religion|Premarital sex being forbidden in Christianity]] is discussed. Chris fumbles for an explanation.<br />
* '''A fan pretending to be black says he believes the government made AIDS to get rid of black people. Chris says that that's the kind of thing a black guy would say'''.<br />
* Premarital sex comes up again. Chris compares it to using porn to practice and learn skills for later.<br />
* The fake black fan calls Chris on his comment from earlier about black guys and AIDS. He makes the excuse that someone else said it first.<br />
* Questions on Sonichu start. Sonichu doesn't wear clothes because it's a comic. Chris isn't sure how [[Blake]] sounds. He might sound black, he might sound like Shadow the Hedgehog. The fake black fan asks why the bad guy has to be black, also mentioning [[Silvana]]. Chris says that he doesn't have to be.<br />
* Chris gets annoyed about the pronunciation of [[Rosechu]] as popularized by the Old Narrator of the [[Audiobooks]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't disagree that the Audiobooks made Sonichu more popular that he ever did'''.<br />
* He doesn't mind fanfics that don't portray Sonichu in a bad light.<br />
* The audio goes low in the main chat and a fan has a private, unrelated conversation for a few minutes.<br />
* Audio comes back as Chris is admitting that the [[B-Manajerk]] was black in real life.<br />
* Chris doesn't watch the news, so doesn't have an opinion on [[Barack Obama|Obama]]. He voted for him because he saw a documentary where he saw more of himself in Obama, namely that he was an outcast at one point.<br />
* A fan says that you should vote based on politics, not personality. Chris says that he is a moderate.<br />
* Chris doesn't know what the financial bailout is. He says that he drew the [[Sonichu 8#The Elevator Gags|racist picture]] of Obama based on his father's joke, before he saw the documentaries that made him vote.<br />
* Chris will not agree or disagree with interracial dating/marriage. He would want a white woman, but he would be [[gal pals|friends]] with others.<br />
* He'd marry an Asian.<br />
* It's not yet known if Silvana will be a good guy or if she will lose her [[pickle|dick]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't know what he wanted to be when he was younger, he's just making it up as he goes along'''.<br />
* '''Chris is keeping the name changes in the comics for legal reasons'''.<br />
* A fan suggests Slaweel cursing Rosechu to have a dick. Chris gets upset before saying that he'll think about it. The fans think it's a great idea. One considers a talking penis for Rosechu. Chris says it's a stupid idea.<br />
* Another fan asks about Chris being sacked from Wendy's. He denies scaring the child with his Donald Duck impersonation, saying that he didn't make him cry.<br />
* Chris might release his DVD one day.<br />
* A fan says that Chris has influenced underground rappers such as Immortal Technique, who has sampled him.<br />
* Chris takes requests. Impersonates MC Hammer, Dr Nick Riviera, Peter from [[Family Guy]], Mario and Sonic, butchering them all and tainting our childhood memories.<br />
* More Sonichu questions. '''Chris won't upload [[Zapina]] [[Rule 34]] because she is underage and Chris is worried about legal ramifications'''. When he is reassured that this would be legal, he says he would consider it. He will also consider Sonichu-Rosechu anal sex. Rosechu would not clean the [[pickle]] with her mouth, she would clean it off with a washcloth. He would not sell the the washcloth on EBay.<br />
* Chris calls a stop to the potty humor displayed throughout the Sonichu questions.<br />
* '''Chris denies that [[Yawning Squirtle]] is a character'''.<br />
* Fans ask for a joke. He recites a dreadful rhyme about Videogame consoles. He then tells his awful [[Christian's sex joke|sex joke]]. Fans start to tell racist jokes about [[niggos|black people]] and Mexicans. Chris calls for a stop to this.<br />
* A fan says that his friend [[mass debating|masturbated]] to the [[rule 34|adult section of Sonichu]] and is now worried that his friend is a [[homo]], as they were drawn by a man. '''Chris says that this is what he intended it for''', and they are drawings of women, so his friend is straight. He doesn't masturbate to his own drawings.<br />
* Chris reassures a fan that [[Mass Debating|masturbating]] in the same room as another man isn't gay as long as both men are thinking of women, but he would not do this.<br />
* Chris offers no comment as to what constitutes adultery.<br />
* Chris says that he is patriotic. Asked to sing the national anthem, he instead mangles a few lines of "My Country, 'Tis of Thee". He then tells a 'patriotic' joke that is insensitive to Mexicans. [[Chris and Hypocrisy|The fans call him on his "no more racist jokes" statement from earlier]].<br />
* Chris does a poor impersonation of Mr T.<br />
* Chris says that if you are married, sleeping with someone else isn't cheating if you have consent from your spouse.<br />
* Chris gives more advice on homos and recommends Axe body spray for attracting girls.<br />
* Chris has not met any celebrities, only local DJs.<br />
* Does impersonations of Homer Simpson and Bender. The two sound identical.<br />
* Chris gives dating advice: Stay calm, polite, friendly and don't let your nerves get the best of you. Say "Hello, how are you" and talk about yourself. '''[[Barbara|His mom]] told him that standing around with a sign makes him look retarded. A female fan cracks up laughing and can't stop'''.<br />
* "Those who can't, teach"<br />
* Chris says he has never even been on a date. Rejects dating suggestions from fans.<br />
* '''Chris was close with Sarah "[[PandaHalo]]" McKenzie, but hasn't heard from her in over two weeks. He heard about the fires and doesn't know if she's still alive. When a fan adds that 108 people were killed in the fires, Chris responds to the entire ordeal with [[Chris and death|"It's OK though, at least I have a good woman who's willing to be by my side at this point"]]'''.<br />
* When pushed, he says he feels remorse for the the victims of the fires and is concerned that [[Sarah Cassandra McKenzie|Panda]] is dead.<br />
* He asserts that he didn't abandon Sarah for [[Julie]].<br />
* '''A fan says that if [[PandaHalo|Sarah]] isn't alive, Chris should take solace that her perfectly barbecued remains fed the survivors. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|SHUT UP!!!]]'''<br />
* Chris says that he cares about Sarah and Julie equally and wouldn't dump Julie as a friend. A fan asks what he will do to the survivors who ate Sarah. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|"SHUT UP!!!"]] and demands that he be booted.<br />
* Fans reassure Chris that Sarah is probably OK.<br />
* Chris does abominable impersonations of Uncle Ruckus from The Boondocks and Hank Hill. '''He sings "Don't Trust Them New [[Niggos|Niggas]] Over There"'''. He also impersonates Meowth and sings the Team Rocket song.<br />
* [[Clyde]] enters. Chris refuses to answer questions and leaves.<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
===Chris proves he is straight===<br />
'''Guy:''' Chris!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all! ''[echoes]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'll be damned.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh, Chris-[gets cut off by another guy]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh you know, can't com- it's uh, can't complain.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' How's construction of the site?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' [unintelligible] so Chris<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I...I need to ask you something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yup?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh... I put those posters, of the... Playboy and everything in my room, and uh, one of my girlfriends saw it, and she got mad at me for looking at other w-... other girls, and she broke up with me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh... I'm sorry to hear that. It could-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, she's calling me a pervert. I-I don't understand this.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Did you... did you ex- did you try to explain to her about situation between you and that guy?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I... I did, and I don't think she understood.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... well, you should try, you should, uh, s-... try, uh, you should try wr-, you should tr-, uh, do you know her email address?<br /><br />
[pause]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So, uh Chris-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' A-also, wait... also, uh, the friend, I was talking about, he, uh, visited, and [typing noises] he, uh, he went into my room, and didn't even notice the posters. He just s-sat in the middle, he didn't s...sit in any uh, part of the room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Huh. Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, uh... so, yeah, I don't know. I mean, my girlfriend broke up with me, called me a pervert, said that I shouldn't be looking at other girls, I mean... I don't know what to do now.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well listen, uh, answer my question, do you have her email address?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Umm... yeah, but she won't... she won't answer me anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm... ok, hmm. Here's what you can do, uh... Do you know your girlfriend's... any of your girlfriend's [[Gal pal|gal-pals]]?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm... well, you should try to... like wr- you should write out... hmm... hmm... here's an idea. S- Write a letter to her and send it via smail mai-, via snail mail, but don't write the return address. On it.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What should I write?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just like, you know, like, they, you know, this is... you know, this is... you, uh, you put your name there, and you, it's, and then you would basically explain the situation between you and that guy, and that's why you had the posters up, well that's why you put the posters up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't really understand what was the point of the posters in the first place?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[sigh]'' it's... ''[sigh]'' if he looks at... if he, if he is very interested, if he is, if he was straight, he would uh, look at the women. Very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But he didn't even notice them. He didn't notice any of the posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, then I guess he is a [[Homos|homo]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' W...well, um, he wasn't looking at anything, not even the guy posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Hmm... He's not blind, surely.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, like, what is he, is he like, uh...I don't know.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I don't know either, man. But, you know at the moment I would suggest you, uh, write the- write the letter to your girlfriend, send the mail, don't write your return address on the envelope, and, uh, mail it to her.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Also my mom saw the posters and she got offended, she's like really religious and st- she said that like, uh, you know, lust is a sin or some shit. Oh, like she said, she's like all against the, the uhh, the like, Playboy in my room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, your- apparently your mom hasn't been [beeps] that open minded that time. So, you know, give her time to reh-cover, she'll uh, she might op- she might open up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I don't think that was a good idea though, I mean, w-why did-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -you suggest it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I was trying to see if he, to, I was trying to s-help you figure out if your uh, if your friend was a homo or not.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I know, but, do you have uh, [Fans talking] Playboy posters in your room?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unclear] I'm very forward.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I have uh, poster of some, of uh, I have a poster in my room of uh, some uh, naked girls I got from adamandeve.com as a bonus.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Then, nobody says anything about it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[clears throat]'' Well, I didn't really have too many oppor- too many people in my room. So, it's kind of like in a hard to notice place.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Um, wondering, um, If you showed anyone, wouldn't they be offended?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe, maybe not, [Fan grunts] it just depends on their point of view.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I wouldn't want the same thing that happened to me to happen to you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I hear you there. Uh, just to so just sound clear... Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie, are you there?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ok, uh, would you be offended if you saw such a poster in my room?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''[breaks up]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, What will, what was that? [Echoes]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie'''</span> Yes I would, kind of.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well that's no problem, I can take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, see that's what I'm talking about, I mean...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, that's why I asked Julie right now, because I respect her. So, because she said that she would, I will take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I've been thinking, um...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you have... [unclear] Chris, I don't think you should look at other woman.[sic] In my opinion.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I see, Julie. Well that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I...I respect that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' She might get jealous, I mean, that's what happened to my...my girlfriend.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, that's fine Julie, I respect your, I respect that. Just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey, can I ask you a question? If uh, he's done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, uh, one more thing, um, you know I've been thinking, uh, I don't really think you need, you know, posters and stuff like,<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' to prove you're straight, I mean, if you're straight, that's all there is to it i-if, am I right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think you're right.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I...I mean, you shouldn't have to prove that you're straight.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> You're right.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I m-mean [line breaks temporarily] Y-you shouldn't have to reassure yours-self. You should just be knowing it, and nothing anybody says, should get very, uh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, it's ve-ah-very-but you see, I have like, I have that [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] in my room, it's just, so that like, you know, for in case I have any-for in case I have any random thoughts, on account really, to tempt me.<br /><br />
''[unintelligible mix of chatter from most participants trying to get their word in]''<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I mean, even if they're random thoughts, even if they're random thoughts, if you know you're ''positive'' about it, you shouldn't have to look at anything to make sure.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, usually.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay. Uh, moving on from all this homosexuality, uh, I have one question, uh- [gets cut off by Chris in the background] ...never mind, [fat douchebag?]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey, ah, let Julie ask a question, let Julie ask her question.<br /><br />
<br />
===7:08 Julie asks about shotacon===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, I was watching you on the Internet yesterday and, what's a shotacon?[slightly cut off]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...I'm sorry, uh-y, I'm sorry, you got cut off, what was that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> What's a sho-[cuts off again]-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...What's a...''short''?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Shot-[cuts off third time, pretty obvious she's saying ''shota'']-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dude, shota.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, shota.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ssshhhh...shota?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, S-H-O-A-T-A [sic].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, it's a word he found online.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, [baby?], yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never heard of that word.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I dunno, if you want to look it up, you can probably find out on an online dictionary...<br /><br />
''[pause, and a weary sigh from someone other than Chris]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'll-I'll take a look. Hang on.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I know some Japanese and I think I've heard that somewhere, like in a magazine or something.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, it's some of that Japanese shit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Probably is. Three moments, I'll look it up.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Okay!<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's radio is audible]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Whoops, that was the wrong one. The wrong bookmark.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' S-H-O-T-A.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I know, I just get the wrong bookmark for...place I wi-for like...dictionary-type website that I have.<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's keyboard taps are audible]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uhhh...Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, now that Julie's done with her question, I also had one.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' He has to find what that means first.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, ''I'm sorry''.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Shit, ah shit, I've just found it on Wikipedia. It's, uh, it's a ma-it's a Japanese name. It's a name of a person. In Japan.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Really.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a Japanese name. I think it's-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh no no, I think you're looking at the wrong thing, it's S- S-H-O-T-A-C-O-N.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> S-H- I mean- O-T-A-C-O-N? Shotacon?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's the same thing, just put C-O-N at the end.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I've read it in a dictionary before, can't remember what it means...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, oh! Okay, here it is, uh..."shotacon, sometimes shortened to shota, is Japanese slang of the phrase 'Shotaro Complex'"...uh..."that describes the attraction to young boys or an individual with such an attraction".<br /><br />
''[Disgusted reactions heard]''<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh my god, what the fuck?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' There's lots of sick people. Y'all are gonna get ricked?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Someone from 4 cent garbage came in and told us to look that up, I didn't-I didn't even want to.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess he's a homo...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Don't worry I banned him already.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Um, Chris, Vivian wants to know if you can like, turn your radio down a bit, it's distracting.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yes, please turn it down.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I thought that was quiet enough, here.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, no, the lady'll probably pick it up<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Alright cool. Merci.<br /><br />
<br />
===10:21 Another fan asks about art supplies===<br />
<br />
'''Another Fan:''' Okay, um, I have a question, um, I like to draw—interrupted by mumbling—I like to draw comics and such, I mean I want to start up a webcomic. What kind of materials do you use?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, like, you mean for drawing?<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well mostly I just use like, uh, paper without lines, like, computer printer paper you can get in, like, Wal-Mart, for an inexpensive price in multiples.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then I use like an RES—RSVP-brand pen with the black ink.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh okay, is it like, um, a gel pen or a ballpoint pen or-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like a ballpoint, it's like a ballpoint pen.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What do you use to color?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I use Crayola brand markers.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would like to—I would—I would—I would recommend getting the Super Tip 50-pack which you can also find at the Wal-Mart.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay. I-[interrupted by someone else on chat]<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's basically-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' At Wal-Mart I usually get the 24-color RoseArts. Those are—those do pretty good too.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhh, Vivian, just so you—just so you know, I'm using the microphone that came with Hey You, Pikachu for Nintendo Sisty-Four [sic].<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, yeah no, no offense, but uh, personally I prefer like, colored pencils and shit cause-[Chris mumbling is heard]-they're like easier to erase. Photoshop [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If you want to use colored pencils that's fine, I'm not, uh, saying that you have to use Crayola markers-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why don't you use colored pencils? They're really good, you should try one on like, at least one page, just try one. One page with just colored pencils.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But um, actually, you can—you can scan your drawings and then color—color them in like, Photoshop or something. [rest of chat murmurs in agreement] That looks really professional, and really good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I prefer using the markers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's just that I-I mean—I mean I've tried—I mean I've colored with colored pencils before, and I just feel best with using markers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I have a question, um, uh, the Hey You Pikachu microphone, how does that work on the, you're using that on your computer? Did you say?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah it's just, yeah, it's like you plug it into uh, into the basic microphone jack.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh, yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Excuse me, I have a nice little Plantronics headset.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Hey Chris can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah, hang on a second, uh... uh, Omicron, that's uh, you're basically, uh, you're basically plagiarizing here. You're even using, uh, parts of my original drawings to, uh, make up your so called real ones and, you're just—you're just parroting—you're just plagiarizing-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's dirty and illegal.<br /><br />
[Unintelligible mumbling]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, you said so yourself, you're being illegal. And plus, and plus I'm-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, isn't combining Sonic with Pikachu the same thing?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, but, but but also, look at this, also I'm looking at this site here, it said, he's claiming the copyright for himself, but he's, but he's not. I mean that's like, but he's, he—he says<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' You need to ban him immediately.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, ban him immediately.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh wait wait wait wait wait...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah maybe you should check-[interrupted by loud noise, probably Chris]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well he said that, he's saying that all of Sonichu material is copyrighted by him, when it's clearly not.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah but you use Sonic and Pikachu, and you copyrighted it-<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' He just offered to give you credit-[interrupted by noisy chatter]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean, I put, I mean, yeah but, I mean, I'm talking about the—the Omnicron [sic] guy here, that's like, just put this link here.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh he offered to give you credit-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes that's the same thing you did.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well no no, he, no-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We decided-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No he's plagiarizing MY Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We just decided [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris it's, it's a parody, kinda like Sonichu is.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but he—yeah, but he's saying, he said—he—on his front page he says, all Sonichu material-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah but he's, he just offered to change it, so are you okay with that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> By changing it to Sonichu X-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, he said he'll give you credit instead of claiming it for himself.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, uh, yeah I would appreciate that, that would be better, yeah, if... he changed that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Alright cool.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Problem solved.<br /><br />
<br />
===15:02 Chris talks about dildos to prove his strength===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes Julie.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you think you could tell everyone about my idea? And, since you're going to do it do you think you could tell everyone so they could look out for it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, your idea... um, oh oh oh, yeah, just basically a video of me standing up to Clyde and showing him how strong I am, doin' a few kicks for the camera or something-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, you should throw some punches, show him what you're made of, you know?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Kick, punch, it's all in the mind ''etc.''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I basically... I pretty much did that when I...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Let him talk, c'mon!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I pretty much did - already proved my strength when I... ripped that... ''dildo'' in half.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Foreign-Sounding Guy:''' Most dildos come apart for cleaning.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' C'mon.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but that thing was screwed together at the seam.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok listen to me...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris...<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' Eh Chris!<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ...could you do a like further test of your strength for me?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''stress sigh'' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I wanna see how strong you are please.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...That's fine, I can do that.<br /><br />
'''Other Fan:''' I mean that's ok, you showed your strength, but you should show her your moves. Like show her, like, what kind of moves you can do.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, let me tell you a story about how this'll work, ok.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' See, my, uh, one of my cousins, uh, this guy at school, kept, y'know, picking on him, calling him gay and stuff, and trying to fight with him, and my cousin told him to sss- y'know, one day, the guy said "Hey man, I'm gonna beat you up" and my cousin said "Look, if I show you some of my moves, I'll prove to you I can kick your ass in a fight" and so my cousin, y'know, he stepped back and, he took, uh, he took Tae Kwon Do, and he did a couple moves, y'know? He just stood there for like five minutes just doing his moves, and, y'know, some punches and kicks and... The guy just backed right off; he didn't even want to talk to him any more. So I think that should work.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> All right, well I'll try that. I'll try that.<br/><br />
'''Guy:''' All right. Sounds good.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br?><br />
'''Fan:''' You try- you always mention about how you're straight but yet in your video about you crushing a dildo, uh, doesn't that kinda like, y'know, not help your cause?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, it proves I'm straight because...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' But you have a dildo.<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I got it free with an order on adameve.com<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' But you ''kept'' it and shit. That ain't cool.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' What I don't... Why were there batteries in...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh yeah Chris, why ''were'' there batteries in it? Why did you keep it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I mean...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it wasn't an easy thing for me to sell, right off the bat, or even to make a profit, so...<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In fact in a way it's a good thing I kept it, cause it allowed me to be able to break it, like I did.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes but why would you keep it?<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why would you keep it?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I woulda saved it for my sweetheart, if she'd wanted it. To use it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Aaaahhh.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But if I were there wouldn't you prefer the real deal?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Some things that metal just can't replace.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Yeah.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I heard that.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' You didn't use it did you?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No I did not.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Did you just throw all the ones you had away?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I only had that one. And there you go, I ri- there you go, I broke it apart.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you just, like, ''take'' it apart, I mean, it did...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' ...seem to come apart, like, screwed on...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I did not take it apart, that thing was glued at the seam. I had to put a lot of strength into breaking it at the middle there.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, but I think, um, showing your moves would be better.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Right.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Clyde would mess with you if you show him you can kick his ass.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey, Chris's a muthafuckin' ''gangsta''!<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Blap blap.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yes, Chris will fuck Clyde's shit up.<br /><br />
(awkward pause)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait, Chris, didn't you say you used a - didn't you say you used scissors to break the dildo?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I pretty much did have to so I could break that ''glued seam''.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, I thought you broke it with your hands.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well I- yeah well I would have but it was dang glued at the seam, so I clipped straight in with the scissors I had.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a pair of Super Shears from [[Cutco]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(feigning interest)'' Huh.<br /><br />
<br />
===19:50 Chris defends his Rule 34===<br />
<br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, let's talk about something else. Uh, Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whenever the announcement of the adult Sonichu page, when I looked at your gallery, very nice stuff, you know, I see a picture of what looks like you with a Sonichu, uh, medallion. Like, and, who's that one girl, exactly?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Who, [[Megan]]?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I thought it was, like, [[Crystal]], cause of the hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, it was - it was originally drawn to be Megan but I censored her eyes to, uh, port- to protect her identity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Mmmmmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''(laughing)'' That's stupid! (?) That's so silly.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I drew that after I found the ED page in November.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you say that?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In protest against it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thought you were going to get rid of it anyway.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I tore up the original drawing, I, in- into squares, and I put in in an envelope.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you upload it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you do that shit? Like, and...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I understand Rosechu, but, like y'know, why, like, something that's from real life. That's the problem (?)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's not necessarily from real life, it depends on you inter- it depends on your interpretation, I mean it's hardly- I mean, '''most women have long brown hair, and the eyes are censored''', so...<br/><br />
(laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''Most'' women?!?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I remember in that one video you were saying it was Megan.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because it broke, because it end up, because it the end it broke up my friend - broke up my friendship eve, my uh, friendship with Megan.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um, can I ask you a question? In the third picture, with [[Angelica Rosechu]], what is... what's happening, is... God... doing...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nope. She's masturbating. And she's enjoying it.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But she has no hands there. How's she doing it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' She's ''enjoying'' it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But she does... She does...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah but how's she doing it? She doesn't have her hands there.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> She does have her hands, she's... ''(stress sigh)'' She's... like most women would be able to do the same thing.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thing it's the angle, Julie. I think it's the angle you were looking at it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah plus uh, the picture wasn't, uh, very - wasn't as clear as, like, you know, I would have liked to have had it, uh, I mean, I had that file for a while, and it...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah some of those are kinda blurry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, some deg- some degraded.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ? a good question, have you drawn anything... of... have you drawn anything like that with me? Cause I would actually like to see, if you did. If so, could you, and let me see? I, uh, sorry, that's very rude to ask.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm sorry, let me answer this guy. Yeah, well, I made a retraction video later saying that I- I disowned that address.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ah, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just after that guy hacked into it and changed to it to suck. And as such.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hang on, I'm gonna take a look at that... My Youtube...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I like this song.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What song?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' The song that's playing in the background of, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what do you think of, uh, what do you think of that guy who advertises products, Billy Mays? What do you think of him?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... Billy... Oh! Yeah he's an ok guy, I watched him on Home Improvement.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Billy Mays?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, that was another guy on Home Improvement, Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No that was the same guy. That was the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Really?!? Let's look up. IMDB, go. ''(sound of typing)''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Believe me, it's the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, I really enjoyed your, um, adult, uh, section of the site.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... okey dokey, very good. Aaahh, trying to figure out how to update the link on this thing here. Oh, maybe under here. Oh there it is, thank God (?), update right now.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(singing)'' You spin me right round baby, right round...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (joining in) Like a record baby, right round round round<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's a classic, I can't help in man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There you are, updated. It's finally fixed.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Actually that was Richard Karn on Home Improvement, not Billy Mays.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well my mistake, I mean the guy had the beard and uhh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh yeah I can understand.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And the voice sounds- and the voice sounds the same...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah. They sound the same.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There's a matter of interpretation apparently I misinterpreted so I will admit that I was wrong.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah see we all make mistakes, don't be too hard on yourself.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unintelligible babble or singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you gotten any fan art submissions or notable? For the uh- webpage?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I got one today... It's like mostly a drawing of that uh that uh- of the fan herself.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -got in the snail mail today.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -Sunday.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hmmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What are you doing for this Valentine's day Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhm... I'm sorry, what was that question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What will you be doing this year on Valentine's day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm depends...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ahhh, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm.<br /><br />
Fan: Surely a man of such magnitude as yourself are going to be doing something important, aren't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Magnitude? Way to choose the words buddy.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Vocabulary talent.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, cause I don't have Julie over here yet.<br /><br />
(Reactions of OHs and AHs)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If she was here...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible) -play games.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Or we could just uh... talk.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Ehehehehe. Maybe... uh... why no redheads?<br /><br />
'''Other Woman:''' Yeah?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I was trying to think about that when the other guy asked that question. Uh... I was trying to think up that unh... mmmm... Uhhhh, redheads just don't be very- tract me so much.<br /><br />
Several: Uh, ah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's- it's- a- pi- a possibility that they're dyed.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmmmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But yeah y'know natural redheads enh, yeah, just don't really turn me on as much.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I see...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you thought about girls with um, highlights?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... (pause) aaahhhh... what turns me on hhh- (inhales) (pause) obviously the women.<br /><br />
'''Man:''' Gotta have the women. (?)<br /><br />
'''Guy''': What about piercings or tattoo?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, neither of those.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhhh-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris! How bout like non-orange hair, not like... no, never mind. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... oh... okay... hmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait Chris! How do you feel about blue hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Blue hair's okay, otherwise I wouldna- Otherwise I wouldn't've liked Sailor Mercury.<br /><br />
'''British? guy:''' That is true, she does have blue hair.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' She's a very fine character. There is no way to deny it.<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Blue hair is OFF DA HOOK!!!<br/><br />
<br />
===28:35 Chris impersonates various cartoon characters===<br />
<br />
'''British??? guy:''' Doesn't Marge Simpson have blue hair as well?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (in some kind of insane voice) Oh yeah! Marge Simpson has blue hair and it's as tall as the Empire State building!!!<br /><br />
(Some HMMs UHs and UMs follow)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yo Chris!! Can you do some impersonations for us?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Oh we'd love to hear that!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just did Marge Simpson.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah you're really talented.<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(Several people talking at once)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> -they're really good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Do another SimpsonsChris, how about Comic Book Guy?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Mmmmhmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I'm very indeed. Oh aren't we all promiscuous and whatnot. I like Batman and Robin, oh look! Stan Marsh has come into the thing again - I forget that guy's name, that guy who did the Marvel comics.<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Stan Lee. (Pause) Chris do your Donald Duck impression.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Everybody have fun (incoherent and scary quacking)<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris you should work for Disney.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's good Chris.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Have you ever considered being a voice actor?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Errrrrp... possibly, I'm not sure.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (incoherent, cut off by Chris)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent... another cartoon voice)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris, you're a Christian, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I was just wondering-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahm actu-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -do you just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm actually a Methodist church.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome, I was just wondering: Do you think AIDS was sent by god to kill the homos or do you think that it's just an accident or something man-made?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thou- the thought never occurred to me... thought never occurred to me.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' can you do an impression of Arnold Schwarzenegger?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hold- the question...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Let Chris answer the question.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thought- the thought never occurred to me about what you just said about the AIDS there mmmm... but y'know, it's a possibility and I will not agree nor disagree with it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I was just wondering I mean, I've had that discussion with some of my Christian friends. I just wanted to get your opinion, thank you.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmhhh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think (clears throat) I think Omicron has a point and you did tell me you went to a methodist church didn't you? So that's-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well th- well my Methodist church is uh more loose on- is not as strict on uh- on uh sex.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris I don't know- I don't know that much about religion in the States but I don't think there is a looser Meth- Methodist church. God makes the rules Omicron says.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, hmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well, you know personally I think that the government made AIDS to kill off all the brothers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whoa, whoa... That's what the blacks always say.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. (pause) I'm going to agree, that sounds like something that uh... well, a black guy would say.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So your church is kinda of uh- they let you do- their kinda loose on the whole moral restrictions?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... (pause) uhhh... that's... what's the question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Your church they- you said they're kind of more uh- y'know they're less strict on the whole moral thing, like, as far as sexuality goes? Right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -ah basically.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But y'know, uhh, I thought you're supposed to listen to the Bible or whatever not, y'know, not necessarily- no, never mind.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (interrupts)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, there's also a uh, there's also a- think about this uh, if you uh- if you- if you were a think uh- you have to find for yourself a good meaning behind uh- good meaning behind watching pornography to uh- like teach how it- how to do this and that when you actually get around to doing it...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's all ???<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's all's considered education for yourself.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' How is that realistic at all?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, it's uh- not a really good thing to learn from, trust me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It can be done before marriage as well as long as me and my sweetheart really love each other very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But not in Christianity.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But all I'm saying is y'know, porn is completely, completely unre- unrealistic I mean you can't really learn anything from it.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It gives- it gives you enough ideas.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unclear)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (incoherent) porn.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' When you actually have sex, it's nothing like porn.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe not like you, you not gonna do it-<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' You can't do it immediately- immediately anal sex cause most women are not very happy with anal sex and also...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay, shut up<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' -and also weird-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Shut up.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Yes.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And... that wasn't cool, like...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That was uncalled for...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, like, suthin' a BLACK MAN would say...<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' That's racist man...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, somebody said it on here first before I did.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Does that make it ok?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, I think he's trying to make it clear that- I dunno.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I typically agree with that guy.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So nothing g- it doesn't make it ok.<br /><br />
(incoherent)<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling) I wi- I'm sorry, I take it back.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(unclear)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Guys can we get back to Sonichu, Please?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah this is getting ridiculous.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unclear) -Sonichu actually.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Anyway, my question is that: why does Sonichu not wear clothes while Rosechu and the other Rosechus do wear clothes? And underwear?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Aaaaaaaaaamp... It's like uh- it's basically a cartoon and it doesn't really matter, it's like... mm... think about this: Most cartoon characters wear at least one article of clothing. At least one article. And uh- it's like Yogi Bear who just wears a necktie and a hat.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 35.14)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Other Guy:''' I think it would be cool if all the Sonichus and Rosechus got together and they and- they all formed a big team and they had special uniforms or something, kinda like the X-men.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Or Power Rangers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh yeah, I don't do- I don't do well- I'm not in- no uniforms. It's a uniform and other Sonichus and Rosechus.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'm just wondering if you'd do another impression: What does Blachu sound like? Uh, Black Sonichu? Or Blake?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eeeeuuunh... Eh... ahhhh...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Can you imitate it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... I'm not sure... uhhhhm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Like does he sound black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Possibly, but I'm not certain. I'm not leaning towards it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I'd like to hear it, but if you don't want...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just never- I just never really thought about that. I'd say that he possibly sounds similar to uh, y'know Shadow the hedgehog. But he could possibly sound, black. He could. Don't quote me on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' All right, I was just wondering if you'd do his voice but...<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Hey why does the BAD guy gotta be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never said the bad guy "has to" be black. (pause) I mean, look at the- the range of villanies, I mean there's black and whites and uh... male females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I noticed that uh- Silvana's also... black lookin'.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just decided to color her black because she was born- she came from outer space from a black egg, which was the- which came out of the rainbow.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah, I was also wonderin' about that like-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I- I- I-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' If Silvana came out of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes it's-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Why would she be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' I mean like black ain't part of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like the black sheep of the family. Y'know you put all the colors together and it does become black.<br /><br />
(unintelligible reactions)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -like a brownish-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) is a (unintelligible) color.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Maybe it's because she's from space and there's not a lot of light in space and it's dark or something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah that- a uh yeah- that's one of the-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hmmm.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhm, did you look at the link of my friend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, ummmm...<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Yeah, since you love blue hair.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh- no I haven't looked at it and I don't wanna make Julie feel jealous if I did- if I went and did.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Julie would mind.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhhh...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You look at pornography don't you?<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' (mumble)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, that- that was two syllables "Rose-chu". You don't- don't add- don't say the "e" it's just "Rosechu".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah you went over this last chat.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>(I don't know, it sounds like "narrator")<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sounds like he says "narrator" again)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh... I was just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, well, obviously the uh- the narrator who did those audio books was incorrect. Specially since I never gave that person the approval to do the audiobooks.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think it's just a fan project and I think he-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' and I think he might have one of the West coast dialects. I know that the South they say y'all but over here-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well obviously he lied-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -different. I'd be proud if they made one of my projects into an audiobook though. That means that there are a lot of fans out there that really like it.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Ay.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' They're not selling to try and make any money off it. They're not trying to rip you off. They always made sure- they always narrate the first page by saying "Christian Weston Chandler" so they're not trying to cheat you or anything.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' The people know you're making it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I- I hear that. I just, apparently they misin- misinterpreted the (audio breaks up) name Rosechu. Or mispronounced it. Misinterpreted, mispronounce- fairly the same thing in that situation... possibly. To answer that question... possibly.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uh, Vivian said that the audiobooks made Sonichu way popular that- than you could ever ever do on your own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I will not disagree with the statement. And I appreciate her help.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris. Would you be offended if a fan wrote a fanfiction about Sonichu?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Faaanfiction... if it's- if it's not demeaning or makes them look stupid. Then it's fine- it's fine. (pause) Like I did mind when, shoot, what's his name? That guy... uhhhh... that guy that the uhhhh... did the animations, on his computer.<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' You did mind or you didn't?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Animations???<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think I know what he's talking about. Are you talking about the um...<br /><br />
<br />
(background noise begins)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' Well the original play was a Greek play. Where they're all y'know... Greeks... and crazy stuff happens and they're all runnin' around in togas. So if you ever wanna see the movie "A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum" it was a classic and it had some real classic people from the 50s and 60s in it. Kinda like "It's a MAD MAD MAD MAD World". Sort of a classic old school movie from funny old school world. First color movie type thing. But that'll be a high school play. You'll wanna see that. You might actually enjoy it. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
(inaudible response)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' You never know that might be fun to do. Well I guess that wouldn't work on the weekend then... you gotta...<br /><br />
<br />
'''(FOR THOSE OF YOU WONDERING WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON, IT APPEARS THAT THERE WAS SOME TECHNICAL PROBLEM THAT CAUSED ANOTHER MUMBLE CHANNEL TO BE RECORDED WHILE THE CONVERSATION WITH CHRIS BECAME BARELY AUDIBLE BACKGROUND NOISE. INSTEAD ALL THAT CAN BE HEARD IS SOME BUTTFACE YAMMERING ABOUT FILMS AND TELEVISION SHOWS. I'M NOT GOING TO KEEP TRANSCRIBING IT. CHRIS IS STILL TALKING AND ANSWERING QUESTIONS, BUT NOTHING CAN BE UNDERSTOOD OVER THESE GUYS.)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''(AT 42.56 THE AUDIO SUDDENLY RESUMES NORMALLY)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Unknown person:''' Uh you-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I uh- noticed he's another BLACK villain.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah in real life he was black. Without meaning any offense to the uh- black guy in general, cause you've noticed, among the Jerkops there's uh- we got black's and white's, males and females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(several people jump in at once)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) -you've never drawn a female officer before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well y'know uhhh... uhhh, comic book number 7, near the end. Near the end of the time travel episode. Uhh, I have no opinion about what Obama's doing cause I don't watch the news.<br /><br />
Accented woman: But you voted for him, didn't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes I voted for him because I saw myself in him when I com- when I saw both the documentaries and downloaded them for the Playstation Network between Obama and McCain. I mean voted for a person I saw more of myself of-<br /><br />
Accented woman: You usually vote for someone based on their political leanings, not how you view them. As I were Republican, I voted for John McCain. Not because I liked him but because I- he had the same political views as me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basi- basically I'm a moderate.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh, I see. Um, I was wondering. I was reading opinions: do you agree with his financial bailouts?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm, I don't even know what it is. So I can't disagree or agree.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Well, to make it short um, it's about uh- the government- President Obama is planning to uh- a new one- (cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You got cut off there.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uhh, ok, we lost him.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yo, Chris, uh, do you, you didn't just vote for Obama cause he was black, did you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I did not vote for him because he was black. I voted for him cause I saw myse- because I saw myself in him. In like, similar lifestyles. And I saw that he was a good man, I mean after all, com- I saw- I saw I watched both of the A&E documentaries, before I can- before I knew who I would vote for.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 45.29)'''<br /><br />
<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris:, Chris what did you see in him that you say in your self?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Like for one thing we were like outcasts, at least one point in our lives.<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Wait, wait hold up earlier you said that you thought he would probably paint the white house black.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh oh that was my father’s joke he said that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Is your father a racist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but you see I drew that for him before I saw the documentaries so respectfully withdrew that comic page.<br /><br />
'''???:''' does your father hate black people.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Not necessarily but it’s just how my father just how my father that does not reflect in any way that’s how he felt (annoying ass noise in the background)<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Man that racist.<br /><br />
'''??? :''' Hey Chris I so the ahh saw the Sonichu and Rosechu love sack that you put up and I thought if was pretty cool for (you adult friends?) I just had a question though: do you have any plans in the comic to have romance between you and one of the hedgehogs I mean-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Yelling) No no no<br /><br />
'''???:''' -we would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' I mean is was just wondering because there are fans how would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Now- now that you answered the his question my kind of relates to his what are your thoughts on inter racial breeding and marriages?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would not agree of disagree with them but in my personal preference I would fell- I would feel more comfortable in having a full relationship with a white woman but I am willing- am still willing to be friends and acquaintances and give and have respect for the black women as well.<br /><br />
'''???:''' What about Asians like Japanese?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I’m ok with them as well (yelling) a once.<br /><br />
'''???:''' So would you get married with a Japanese woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hhhmmmm I would have, yes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> but I’m giving Julie to opportunity here.<br /><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: Julie’s a lucky woman.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris, I was just wondering, is Silvana gonna become one of the good guys, like- like Black Sonichu did before?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There’s a possibility but I have not given that a co- I have not confirmed that yet.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Uh, is she gonna lose the male sexual parts and become a full-fledged woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhhmmm possibly but I haven’t given that- I haven't given that thought either.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Also um I was reading (?Phillip’s?) question, Chris what did you want to be when you were little?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don’t remember, I do not remember. I’m just making it as I go basically.<br /><br />
'''???:''' is there ever gonna be like uh, an end to your sonichu series like a finale?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hmmmm I don’t know, probably would not.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Oh so it keeps going and going?<br /><br />
???: You ever consider making comic about the history of CWCville?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhmmmm an episode dedicated towards that possibility.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris are you going to keep the name changes that you made or are you going back to the original names?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahhh ya I’m keeping the name changes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' But you know umm Nintendo was umm, y'know, they sent you a letter you never really talk about it further.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but at least- at least- the hel- they use to benefit me for the fact that uh allowed me to fix noting in that sense so I couldn’t be sued by such people in that sense.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 50 min)'''<br /><br />
<br />
(scattered reactions)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So the name changes were good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So uh, Chris I was wondering if uh Mary- Mary Lee Walsh Or I guess the new name: Ryam Sla- I don't know-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Sla-weel.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Slaweel, thank you. Uhm, if she were to use her magic to curse Rosechu with a penis, would Soni- what- wou- would that test the relationship between Sonichu and her? While they were fighting the battle to have it removed, I'm just curious.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... Firstly uh, she does not- she does not have the power ch- to do that.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I just thought you know, remember you did the story about 4-cent-garbage and drawing all the- the picture and-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah you what, that's one- that's one thing: drawing them, but not actually putting them on the character.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Cause I think that would be like an epic story though, like to actually have a quest-<br /><br />
Fan: I'll second that.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -to go to have that penis removed from Rosechu. I mean it's a test of romance between her and Sonichu.<br /><br />
(muttering)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And when that prevails and the penis is removed and everybody- everybody lives happily ever after. Y'know that would be awesome.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnnnnnh, I dunno I have to- I dunno I have to think about that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It is a really good idea. I like it.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I do too.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah, that's good.<br /><br />
Other fan: It could show just how much Rosechu means to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I'll- I'll consider it but I'm not making any promises.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' We understand.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(several talking at once)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -decided on that subject?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm working on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' If you actually decide to go forward with that story? Do you think maybe- maybe you could give her a talking penis?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!!!<br /><br />
(laughter from various people)<br /><br />
(unintelligible responses)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ok, I think- I think we've talked enough about that one guys.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I have a question that doesn't involve penises.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Anyway, my question is since we've been hearing lot of vicious lies and slander about this, could you confirm exactly why you've been fired from your job at Wendy's Chris? Cause we've been hearing all sorts of- of crazy things and we wanna know the truth.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmmmmmm... well, firstly, what have you heard?<br /><br />
'''Other guy:'''Well we heard that uh you... we've heard so many things like you helped a small child and you did a Donald Duck impersonation and you scared the child.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... also that- also that is correct but I did not scare the child. The child was tired, I was only trying ta- I was only trying to make the child feel better. That's a little amusement. But I did not make the child cry, the child was already- was just tired.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' So you didn't help them cut their food and... yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I did help them- help them get their food to- by giving them uhh, by giving them bags and a top for their baked potato boat.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris, when will um, the pictures of Zapina, appear on the um, 18 plus page?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that was a deleted scene! That was a deleted scene.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Why was it deleted?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basically, hhh... y'c- y'cant' really have it if you don't have Rosechu working to take the- working to take the pictures of herself up in the bathroom. Cause like can't have one without the other.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaahhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I don't know if this is a good question but there's something I wonder about that- we kind of have this DVD you made and... y'know, we never unfortunately got... but I'm curious um... do you ever plan to release it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I'd pay money for that, I think everyone else here would probably pay money for it too.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Indeed.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (breaking up) I wanna ask a question.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I hear it's also on YouTube.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris do you know that you've influenced the rap/hip hop community?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmh... uh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I just wanted to mention that because I saw some YouTube videos and it- and- and from some underground hip hop artists such as Immortal Technique and they've sampled some of your voice audio complaining about your struggles with uhm... with the school board, with the security guards and they were- they felt so empowered that they actually took those words and mad'em into a very powerful rap song. How does that- how is your reaction to that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhhhh... basically I have not watched those videos so... I don't have an opinion.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I will provide you a link to that, hold on a moment.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh that's ok, actually I uh, did sample one. The one where they basically played the parody from "Can't touch this".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, no, trust me it's waaay more serious than that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I still haven't heard of- heard of what you're talking about.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Nevermind.<br /><br />
(rustling and moving noises)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do an impression of MC Hammer?<br /><br />
(more clicking and rustling)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Can't touch this do do do doo do dooo Can't touch this! Do do do dooo do do do... can't touch this.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' That was- heheheh.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Awesome.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you- can you do Dr. Nick Riviera from the Simpsons?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> HIIII EVERYBODY!<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hello Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hi Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hi Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that should say Dr. Nick cause that's who I'm imitatin'.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''???:''' That uh-<br /><br />
'''???:''' HELLOOO EV'RYBODY!!!!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well that-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hi Dr. Nick!<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Thank you, I love the Simpsons.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do... Peter from Family Guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhenhenhenh... Hey Lois! Look at me! I'm just (unclear) you nose, and I'm eatin' your nose.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh that's dead on.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Oh would you- Omicron's been interested in tis- would you actually make a documentary like- like your other DVD but make your daily life?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... I'm... yeah I might but uh... I'm not su- I'm not sure bout it at the moment.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaaaaaaanh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris can you do Mario? You know from Super Mario?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hay paisano! How you doin' mistah hedgehog!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's very good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then Sonic- then Sonic would say "what?!?"<br /><br />
(giggling)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris do you have any plans to make a video of yourself taking a dump on a Hexbox?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No! That's gross.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Yeah that was pretty sick right there.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Let's ban him.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's bad enough I cut in half with an axe.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> and one of the elevator jokes...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Oh we remember that, that was a classic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And I earned a trophy for that.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmm...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Yeah, I remember that, it was destroying a Hexbox by cutting it in half if I remember...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' If I were to draw nude Zapina fanart, uhm, would you put them on the site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... uhh, your- you uh- free to draw them at your- at your own- own preference, but I will not be- I will not put it on the website because- cause- because I will not want to break any laws of having underage portrayals- portrayals of underage nudity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Isn't Dot a child?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry... what?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dot, from Animaniacs.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' So-uh- uhm- I think I looked up somewhere that um, drawings do not count, they're just lines on paper not like real pictures that are horrible.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah I believe-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Draw-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (cut off)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Those illustrations do not count as child pornography. Because with drawing it's art- it's artistic merit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Welll... I dunno, I guess it depends I have to- but- y'know you could do the drawing and I'll think- I'll consider it.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, would it be possible to get any pictures of Sonichu having anal sex with Rosechu?<br /><br />
(pause... thumps and feedback)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm considering that but...<br /><br />
'''Accented woman''' Who keeps letting this person in? You are very offensive.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -and and, if you draw those, do you think that Rosechu would actually clean Sonichu's penis off with her mouth (laugh) w-when they're done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nah, no, I don't think so, I think- I think- I think it would be unh- yeah w-wash it off with a washcloth.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Do you think then, at that point then they would sell the washcloth on eBay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!<br /><br />
(people talking over each other)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, no, no more potty humor, all right?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah alright, okay<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Unrelated to party humor, I want to ask that in your Springbreak uhh Issue of Sonichu you had an introduction of a, of new character, the [[Yawning Squirtle|squirtle]] and I wanna ask<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:''' (interrupting)</span> No, that's, no, no, no, that's not just a character, I was, I was not introducing a new character, I was just doing like a poster thing for a bubble speak under one, I thought I just draw some water type pokemon un-in there<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I understand but the thing is there is huge cult following for that character and I strongly suggest that you should capalize on that and, and make him to a main character<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eh... No, I don't think so<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's just sleeping Squirtle work- waking up!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, people just thought he was really cute and yawning Squirtle, I don't know, I heard someone say, man wouldn't it be great if he would be that [[Autistic|dopey]] sidekick that he'd come and they'd be like, like, he'd come in and say something silly after someone did something and they would be like "Squirtle"!<br /><br />
People laughing and talking over each other<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um...<br /><br />
???: Yo, it makes you *unintelligible* (Chris and someone talk over another)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yes Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I'm asking you about... Hm... Never mind, I lost my train of thought. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's okay. These guys made me lose a train of thought as well. Doesn't multiple inputs.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yes, kinda lotta control here. I might- I may have to... never mind<br /><br />
Silence<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I never lose my train of thought because I have a GPS tracking system on it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, that was a good joke. (chuckle)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, could you tell us a joke right now. Just any joke.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay, here is a fuck- here is a funny- here is a funny mind scream. Funny rhyme scheme... not to be taken literally:<br /><br />
On your Game Boy Advance SP<br /><br />
create 'yer MII<br /><br />
den play it on WII<br /><br />
with your PSP<br /><br />
hooked to your PS3<br /><br />
cause it's fun<br /><br />
see?<br /><br />
And never ff, and never play a [[Hex Box]] 360<br /><br />
Because it's stupid and you're not a dummy (in childlike voice)<br /><br />
Mock laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That is really good.<br />
'''Fan''': Chris is that something you made up?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I made that up.<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Chris, Chris, can I write that down and tribute to quote you that? Oh man, that's good<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) So you mean to type it up and you quote me on the rhyme scheme?<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Yeah, I'd like that. I've been thinking about making a quote book like a mini Chris quote book like something you could open and have a cool line to say when you're on a party and you're like right things.<br /><br />
People talking over Chris and Alucard<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, well I'm typing it up for Alucard, so...<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Thank you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, can we hear one more?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay well here, okay um, okay here is an [[Christian's sex joke|adult joke]] I once come up with a long time ago.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': This is going to be good!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright- Alright there's this married couple, Bob and Jane, and they've been- they were looking forward to having children. So, one night, Bob comes home from work, and uh Jane says, "Hi, you had a good day, dear?" And he sa- and she sa-- he says, "Nah, it's been a long day, darling" And she said, "Well, it's okay, why don't we go upstairs, and we'll have some Breakfast." And he says, "Breakfast, at Nine p.m.?" And she says, "Sure, you bring the MILK, and I'll get an EGG."<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yo, I heard that before, man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then later, they had a boy and a girl, Junior Bacon and Orange Juice. All Part of a Balanced Breakfast.<br /><br />
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif]]<br /><br />
Perplexed silence<br />
<br />
'''Fan''': Hey, Chris, how do you solve a Mexican tank?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Stand in front of it?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': No, man, shoot the guys pushing at it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fans''': Oh that's a good one.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' I got one.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get a bunch of [[Niggos|blacks]] in a car?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Throw some chicken in.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get them out of the car?<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Job application.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What do you call a beach of black people buried up to their necks?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Afro-turf.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I came up with one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what's the difference between a black man and a pizza?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': A pizza can feed a family of four.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': How do you stop black people from jumping on a bed?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, enough racist jokes.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Put velcro on the ceiling.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enough, enough black jokes.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, uh Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Sorry<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I showed by friend that over 18 site, and he said, that he um, he um, you know he, he masturbated to it. Does that make you feel (interrupted)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's good, that's basically the reaction I would be going for. Among the male ca... among the male population, being attracted to the women.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But those are your drawings, it's like, I think he's gay now. I mean, you're a guy and you drew those.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm drawing, I'm drawing female characters.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yah, but it's drawn by you and you're, like, I don't know. It's kind of awkward for me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris, I actually need to thank you, the pictures on that site, it looked like the camera was inside Sonichu's penis when Rosechu was giving him a blowjob. That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. I've always wanted to have a camera in my penis so that I could see that if I ever got a blowjob, that would be awesome, I just wanted to say thank you very much for that perspective. It's the first time I've ever seen it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': There's a question here on the site, oh sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, well I see it... no I don't basically masturbate to my own drawings.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But you're okay if other people do, right? Even guys?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You're okay if other people, you know, masturbate to your drawings? Even if they're guys, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If the guys are masturbating to the female drawings, then yes, that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I just thought it was kind of awkward, but maybe I'm seeing it a different way.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I doubt that, uh, having a whole bunch of drawings of naked female characters can be misinterpreted as something else.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Can I to ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': One time, a friend and I were looking at porn together, and we masturbated together, but the porn was straight, ordinary porn. Is this gay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I'm sorry, where you looking at naked women?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Yes, but we were in the same room, masturbating.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, if you both were thinking about the naked women you were looking at, then I would definitely say you both are straight, cuss you're not thinking about each other, you're thinking about the women.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Right. <br /><br />
'''Fan''': Would you do that with someone?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': I'm relieved.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Man, nigger you gay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Shut up. Would you do that with someone? Like a guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Nah, I'm straight dog.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I'd, yeah I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Omnicron has a question on here, on the side here.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You see it, or?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. That's not straight.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what about the earlier question.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, the one before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, which one before? Oh, you mean...<br /><br />
(All talk at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, what do you think about-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wait, wait let him answer.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Let him answer that one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was gonna rephrase it but okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'd say it would depend on your interpretation, what is adultery to you?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But, you know, isn't the Bible only supposed to be interpreted, it's the word of God, you're not really supposed to interpret it any other way.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': It is what it is.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's in English.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh, I have no comment.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, that's what my, uh, you know I was talking about my mom saw those drawings. I mean, not the drawings, the posters, the playboy posters and that's basically what she got bad about. She said I was committing adultery.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah okay, if you don't want to talk about it, fine.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, hmmm, I think you shou, I think you should, uh, when you, I think I can see where this could be interpreted one way or another, it depends on how you look at the woman. I mean, alright, you're looking at the, uh woman, you might imagine her naked, but, I mean, you would respe- I mean, you would, you would still respect, I mean, if you were still respecting that woman, you would appreciate her more for like who she was aside or in addition to the nudity, then that's not as bad as just, as just only doing it for the appearance.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's why, uh, that's why the playboy magazines, they give you the introductions of the women. It's like letting you know who they are (unintelligible).<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh but, yeah, but there weren't any, uh, descriptions under the, yeah never mind.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Thank you for the clarification Chris.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris, do you love America?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm patriotic.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's good. I was wondering if you could sing the national anthem for us?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [[Wikipedia:My Country, 'Tis of Thee| My country tis' of thee. Sweet land of liberty. Of thee, of thee I sing.]] I don't remember the rest.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Lands where my fathers died.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Land of the pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
(Fans all start singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Stop it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey I'll, I'll tell y'all a funny joke that's kind of patriotic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, you got this, you got this funny Mexican- you got this funny Mexican guy, and he just, he just come back home to Meh-he-co after an American visit. He's like (high pitched voice) Oh the people there are so very friendly. I mean, I go to the basketball game. I sit in the back row. I sit in the back row. And then, and then, and then all of a su- and then all of the sudden right before the game started, everyone turned around, put their hands on their chests, and they say, "Oh say can you seeeeee"!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I thought you said no racist jokes?<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': Yeah man, that ain't cool!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was a name, it was a name joke.<br /><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''':...Spanish language<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm kind of offended by that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': That's racist dog. That ain't cool.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': You laugh you support terrorism.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ¿Qué?<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What'd you say?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What the hell? Who said that?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Forget it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I said, you laugh, you support terrorism.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, he's gone.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Awful Mr. T impression) I pity the fool, who try and misinterpret things, and twist them around, and then jam new words into my mouth.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You do a good Mr. T<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah you do.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) no jibber jabber.<br /><br />
(Fans laugh)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, did you watch the A-team back in the day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No but, no but, basica- but I have seen Mr. T. And then I also, I also saw when he guest, when he quest starred in an episode of Alvin and the Chipmunks.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I saw that episode, he helped uh Theodore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Theodore was getting picked on, yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, you posted a link here.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well at my [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|Methodist church]], uh, sex before marriage is okay as long as, uh, she and I, we love each other very much and truly.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But that's what they tell you, I'm talking about the word of God.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *Sigh* Okay, I'm getting tired, okay, I'm getting tired here, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, but...<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, sorry, no more of that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, you're right. Please stay Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay. Alright, I'll stay a little while longer.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, if anyone does, if anyone asks anything that makes him feel uncomfortable, I'm gonna kick you out of the room.<br /><br />
(Everyone speaks)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Chris, could you give me some advice?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I have a Japanese friend, he's, he's actually 26 and he's never had a girlfriend and we asked him some questions, just joking around one day. And we asked him if his, when he gets married, if his wife wanted to sleep with another man, would he be okay with it, and he actually said yes, as long as she wasn't being forced. Now that kind of bothered us, because us Americans, right, we think that marriage, and you know you're with somebody, they should be faithful, but he doesn't seem to think so, so I wanted to see if you had any advice maybe on what we could do to try and convince him that his viewpoint is wrong.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, hmm, it's not necessarily that the viewpoint is wrong. See, the thing is, what, to, to quote, to make it accepta- to make it like as if you're actually cheating on somebody, cheating on your spouse in the marriage, it's like not telling them, not telling him, not telling him or her about it beforehand, but it's like, you know, you, it's like you tell them beforehand and you get their approval, it's, it's okay, even if they don't want to be part of it. But not telling them, that's definitely like uh, cheating on them.<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that's another thing I would have to think about, cause, got a bit of a, couple of items of destruction that need to be repaired<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I just got, I just talked to that one friend I was talking about who, uh, saw your website, the 18 one, and it turns out he's, he's gay, he's actually gay and he fapped to, uh I mean he masturbated to, uh, Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hahaha, your friend's a fag.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': And I think he's...<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out for 15 seconds)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ...about that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I think in case you would definitely want to let him know that you are straight and you don't want that kind of relationship, and maybe, and you know<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I tell him just to get the hell away from your site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm not saying that, but like, uh, you know, you don't want that kind, you don't, I mean that's, that's basically confirmed on that note. So, uh, you want, you still wanna be friends but you don't, but you're not into that kind of thing.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I mean, he was looking at your site, like, the 18 site and he was in like, um-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Over 18.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': The over 18 site you made. The loveshack. I thought he was just like, you know, masturbating to Rosechu, but it turns out he was attracted to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *sigh* Uhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, I don't think I'll be friends with this guy anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, yeah, then tell him, yeah, to get the hell out of your house and stay away if you don't want to be friends anymore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Seems like you know too many gay friends mister.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh shut up.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris, you know how-<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's not my fault. <br /><br />
'''Another fan''': You know how cologne or perfume, you know, women wear that to try and attract men? Do you think that farts attract gay guys to each other?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Now that's stupid! Not only is that stupid, but it's gross.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Here, I'm gonna take that question and I'm gonna, I'm gonna take that question and spin that into something that's less weird. What would you say the best cologne or whatever a guy could wear to get a girl's attention?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I recommend [[Axe|Axe]] body spray.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh yeah? I think I tried that one time.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': That actually does it for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What scent do you use?<br /><br />
(All speak)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Don't you use ass body spray?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Mmm, love it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Does the Axe effect, does it really exist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Does Axe exist?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, the Axe effect. You know, they say in the commercials spray it and girls will come to you.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) and it works for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Has it worked for you Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, well, yeah, I, yeah I haven't got that working for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I think it's a scam personally.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I mean... I mean, Old Spice is pretty good. I had, I had like a couple of girls go up to me asking me for dates with Old Spice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I actually wore that Orion sent, uhh, still smelling it. So it will work Chris, you just gotta give it time.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Using the Axe.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Cameron but, isn't Axe spray for men?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': No no no no no no no, see, see I said a boyfriend, a boyfriend that I met.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, okay.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah. *laughs*<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That makes sense.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, silly, silly. I have a question for you Chris, what celebrities have you met?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Well what I'm saying is the Axe effect doesn't work. Okay, sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't actually met other celebrities in person, my real life, unless you count a local radio DJ.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I've met the DJ of my radio station 95.1 and [[Excel Saga|Monica Rial]], and meeting Monica Rial was just a treat.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ahhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was, it was good.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, she's pretty.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Maybe you should go to her and, um, maybe she could be like a contact for voice acting. I mean, you do pretty good imitations.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Do Homer Simpson!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Homer Simpson impression) Oh, look at me! I'm a stupid old person, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp, D'OH!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That was awesome<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Who else can you do Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What other imitations can you do?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, a lot. It depends on if you name it, I might recall, if you name the person or character I'll, if I can recall my memory than I will imitate that person.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Can you try Bender from Futurama?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I reckon I can do a pretty good Bender! I can twist off my arm and, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, um, since my girlfr-(clears throat)-sorry. Since my girlfriend broke up with me, I was just wondering if you could give me any tips to like, pick up y'know, another girlfriend?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) Valentine's Day is coming.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah. It's gonna be lonely without her, y'know.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah I know.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Can you help?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) No I do not know what tha- neither of them sound like in voices so I can't imitate them. (sigh) As for- as for dating advice uh, if you're- when you're going out to meet a woman, and this is like advice that's like it could've been taken from my, taken from my own advice I gave in the, the one in the video I did when I just turned 25. But it was definitely, it was given, but it was offered in this book written by a nine-year-old.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> When you're going to uh find yourself a woman, you just try to stay calm. And uh be polite, friendly. Don't uh let your nerves get the best of ya.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What should I say, what should I say here, y'know, to the girl?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Start with "hello" and "how are you".<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I ask her, should I like do a pick-up line? Do those work?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Um, sometimes. But I wouldn't, I wouldn't exactly count on it in a desperate situation. But I mean like uh, talk about yourself a little bit saying like, "Ooh did you read in the paper today about this article that really caught my eye?"<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was thinking about standing by the wall with [[Attraction Sign|a sign]]. Saying that I need a girlfriend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, don't- don't do that. That makes you look retarded.<br /><br />
(Laughter)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What about wearing a sticker that says you're single. Have you ever tried that? Do you think that would work?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what was that? A stick-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wearing like a uh, a sticker that says "I'm single".<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Wait a second I'm not done yet.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Oh I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I got that idea from your comic. I mean I thought it was a-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. I later learned that that, I already learned from my mother that made me look retarded. (Female fan laughs) To other people, so...<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Ohh. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So I stop- So I stopped- So I stopped doing that a long time ago and, I don't know (what payed attention?)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mm. Basically I'm running from others that have offered such advice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh yeah like John Tesh I remember that in your news dash.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. And also it's like uh there's an expression in my elementary somewhere uh, those who can't teach.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Um, I remember (unintelligible). Um, I was um, looking at um (something), how do you feel about Obama swearing in his book? Even read it out loud in the audiobook version.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hm. (rustling and typing in the background) Hm. Ah, yeah I heard of that, didn't care much, didn't uh give much thought into it so... Uh swearing yeah don't care much for it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': So Chris I was just wondering uh, like can you hear me?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I can hear you.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Uhh. Does wearing that medallion, does that attract females? I was thinking about making my own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) You could do what you want, to try and make yourself stand out. Um... But it depends on if you, it depends on other peoples' point of uh you I guess at this point, um... You might want to get a second opinion. I mean it's not like I can see you over da Mumble and uh say what makes you look okay and what makes you look NOT okay. Yeah, g- get a second opinion from somebody else in person.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What about you, do you think that medallion makes you look, y'know, more attractive to girls?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhmmm. Yeah. Yeah I don't know. I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah I think it looks pretty cool on you. So that's, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well you could try it, see if you could try and see if it works for ya.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Speaking, speaking of the medallion, I noticed you wear it on the outside. Have you ever done any replacing the chain on it to something a little more comfortable?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh no. It's fine. It's fine. I mean I'd say that this uh the necklace chain with the like a pair- like a pair of- like a pair of keyrings with a belt buckle on them.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm. Alright.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris in hentai, the uh guys- like the girls usually say no but the, the guy touches her a bit and she gets into it. I was just wondering if you think that really works, have you ever tried that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh. I'm sorry, could you repeat that?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': I said in hentai, y'know the Japanese um, kinda pornography-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Yeah-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': -usually, the, the girl kind of says no but then the guy starts touching her boobs or something and she gets real excited and gets into it. I was just wondering if you think that really works. Can you just make a girl excited and into you just like t hat?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhh... Yeah I don't think so. I me- I mean in most of the time I'm sure you would probably just, the girl would probably just turn around and slap you right in the face or kick you in the groin.<br /><br />
(Various pained groans)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, you were saying it's educational. I think I saw that in a porn too.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Uh. Also (unintelligible) asked "How far have you gotten with a girl"?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I've never even been on a first date in my lifetime.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ohhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> At this point.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris?<br /><br />
(Fans talk over each other)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I was suggesting uh Chris, I have family in Bristow, Virginia. I've been out there a lot. And you know, they're- I mean, people that I've seen in Virginia don't really like anime and things that much. Have you ever considered maybe trying to meet a girl in the west coast? Because a lot of people, especially universities are into anime culture. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) Yeah but I'm no- I'm not planning on traveling outside of my state. Plus I would prefer to keep it local.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah.<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
(Everyone talks over each other)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but to see the world means to have to have the money to actually go see the world.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Well You just have to save up a little bit.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah. I mean you know, trains are good.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': (strange incognizable noise)<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Gas is cheap now.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': You can meet so many people just going on a road trip or just you know, taking the bus or something I mean it's not too expensive, it's cheaper than a plane- (Chris talks over him)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Yeah, I hear you on that. But I just like, you know, if I want to go on a road trip I'd uh, I would not like to go it alone. I'd like to have my sweetheart by my side.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Mmm.<br><br />
'''Fan''': The point is you could always get a job. That's what I did once a-(cut off)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh.<br><br />
(Fans talk over each other)<br><br />
'''Other fan''': -and I wanted to meet a girl? I got this t-shirt that says "ask me about my large and attractive penis" and I wear that to the mall and it works every time.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Are you kidding, really?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yes. (cut off)<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Well that's interesting. (laughs) I have to meet you some time. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah boy. Uhh, alright, gentleman's clubs um...<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what was that noise just now?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Noise?<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I heard like a (snorts) noise.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Yeah, that was probably me be- because I was like objecting to the uh, when he was describing what it said on his t-shirt.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah that wasn't cool. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': You guys have no taste. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah-<br><br />
'''Guy''': Disgusting!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I know.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay um. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>But it just uh, just it m- just ma- I mean the way I see it, see somebody else wearing that it makes, it uh, it makes- it s- it would appear that guy is only looking for sex and women would be turned by sh- sh- sex right away at that point.<br><br />
'''Guy''': Yeah it kinda sums up (cut off)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Um, so...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um... (Chris and Fan talk over each other) Yeah let me answer this guy's question. Yeah I don't know much about gentleman's clubs so I can't really answer that question. A, and uh... <br><br />
'''Fan''': What about you though, like when you're looking for a girl, does like sex really matter? Like, to attractiveness?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, er, yeah. Eventually the se- yeah. Attractiveness does matter in one point of view but uh, but if you think about it it's like you want to get to know the person, the woman inside as well. Um, so, (I'd rather be in it?) so like uh, we were very close to each other emotionally and like friends, then the sex. Like uh, how Panda and I were very... close.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Hmm.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': What happened to Panda?<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah what happened to her?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't heard fermer- I haven't heard from her in over two weeks and then recently there were, there was the fires in Australia close to by where she was. So I don't know whether she's still alive or not. I haven't heard from her in over a coupl- over two weeks.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': That's awful.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah. I heard it was real bad, it was like a hundred and eight people died from those fires.<br><br />
'''Black fan''': Daaaamn!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but you know it's okay that at least I have uh, at least I have uh, at least I have a good woman who w- who's willing to uh be at my side at this point.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Man... Uh-<br><br />
(Multiple people talk at once)<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': -for the people who are dead?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': So you feel no remorse for the people who have died in Australia?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh no no, I DO feel remorse. Especially to Sarah sh- eh- I mean... I worry about her she's still ali- I worry about- I'm concerned if she's actually dead or still alive.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah I'm sorry to hear that.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I me- I mean, I mean I'd li- I mean I pray every day that she's still alive safe and well. And that she contact me soon.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': But you... you automatically, you basically abandoned her for Julie.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But I did not basically abandon her for Julie.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': That is what it appear- seems like.<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh)...(sigh)<br><br />
'''Fan''': She could be still alive, you never know.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Even if she isn't still alive, take solace in the fact with her perfectly barbequed remains fed to survivors.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> SHUT UP!!!<br><br />
'''Fan''': Um, that was too far, you're going too far man.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. And at this point I care about both- I care about of uh both of them equally. Both uh Sarah and Julie. But it's like, it's like you know uh, I'm uh stil- if she let's me- if she uh gets in contact with me, letting me know that she's still alive, and uhh she...<br><br />
'''Fan''': But I'm letting you know Julie, if she's still alive what are you gonna do then?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': And if people actually did eat her what would you do to them?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> OH SHUT UP!!!! Kick that guy out!<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
(laughter in background)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay um. Uh...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, but you know in all seriousness if Sarah gets in contact with me and lets me know she's gonna be coming my way in real life, and uh-<br><br />
'''Fan''': You're not gonna dump Julie are you?<br><br />
(uneasy pause)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I wouldn't dump Julie as a friend.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh but! Oh...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie I still, Julie I still love you.<br><br />
'''Late guy''': Hello everyone.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But you told me I was your sweetheart, didn't you?<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh hello, Doctor.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm. (stress sigh) Julie I'm going through a- I'm going through a transition right now so it's kind of hard for me to make uh, short watch of what I say at points and y'know answering these kind of questions.<br><br />
'''Fan''': I'm sorry uh, I don't mean to offend you or anything. Well I was just wondering-<br><br />
'''Guy''': (unintelligible) guy Chris. <br><br />
'''Other guy''': Uncalled for. <br><br />
'''Black fan''': Y'know what, don't worry about Sarah. Cause, y'know it usually takes like, like months for a person, like a victim of a fire or a flood of some crap like that, to y'know find shelter and then phone and internet and all that.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': You know, if the place is in a state of emergency, people are getting moved around all over the place, there's people in the hospital, I'm sure she's fine she just can't y'know talk to anyone.<br><br />
'''Guy''': What about Alucard's question?<br><br />
'''Fan''': Wait, yeah.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) Uh, I can't answer that question.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm?<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Why not?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because I'm still in a transition right- I'm still in a transition from Sarah to Julie at this point so uh I can't answer that question right now cause I wouldn't know how to answer it.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': It seems-<br><br />
'''Guy''': So you "transition"?<br><br />
'''Fan''': It's a hard choice, I can't blame you I mean, yeah.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I mean you know what, that's- that's a flat out bad question, I mean I would- I'd be able-<br><br />
'''Other guy''': It's quite valid.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (aggravated) Auuuughh! Okay now I'm gettin' uh, okay now my head's out of order.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Oh.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': I've had that problem too.<br><br />
'''Guy''': It's never fun.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay forget it then.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Uh okay I got, I got one. Impressions, impressions! Uh, can you do one of Bill Clinton?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... no.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Um, Chris? Do you-<br><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh)<br><br />
'''Other guy''': I was wondering do you watch the Boondocks on Adult Swim?<br><br />
'''Black fan''': Aw yeah that's my show!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I've watched the Boondocks.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Did you enjoy it?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's alright.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Can you do any imitations of the characters there, like Uncle Ruckus?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent gibberish) -dem niggers over there! Sing along if you know the words to that song I just made up.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': What was that?<br><br />
'''Guy''': That was, wait, what?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That was Uncle Ruckus. Well I'll tell ya what I sell propane and propane accessories all day long! (begins a high-pitched cackling and squeals more gibberish)... That was-<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Could you do Meowth from Pokemon?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Meowth!<br><br />
'''Fan''': The talking Meowth.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Meowth! ... (cackles again) Aye Jessie, James, we gotta go snag that Pikachu again!<br><br />
'''British guy''': Do you know how to do the Team Rocket song?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, the Team Rocket song er, do you mean the motto?<br><br />
'''British guy''': Myes the motto, the classic one.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Hmmmm... Prepare for trouble make it double, to protect the world from devastation, to uni- to unite all people- o- (sigh)...<br><br />
'''Guy''': ...in our nation!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mm. Anyway... (sigh) Hang on I'm a little mixed up here. Prepare for trouble make it double, to protect the world from devastation, to unite all people within our nation, to debi- to debide(sic) the evils of truth and love, to extend our reach to the stars above. Team Rocket blast off to the speed of light, surrender now or prepare to fight.<br><br />
'''Guy''': ... Meowth, that's right.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': That's right!<br><br />
(chuckling)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Now hand over the Pikachu!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. (sigh)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Oh come on-<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': -than Sonichu, because Sonichu is obviously more powerful than Pikachu!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I will not hand over the Sonichu, so there. (pause) Alucard, stop asking the questions please?<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': Yes Alucard you are very annoying.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah someone kick him out.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br><br />
'''Guy''': Good goin' Canine.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
'''Canine''': Anytime. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm. Actually I'm k- actually I'm kind of tired now uh... I'm gonna- I'm gonna head on down now but y'know I'll come back another night.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Okay.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': Well thanks for coming Chris, we really appreciate it.<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: No. I've got a few questions for you Chris, I've been waiting.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Clyde no, no, no.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': How did he get in here?<br><br />
(Everyone yells over each other)<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: It's important!<br><br />
'''Guy''': Ohh he leeeft!<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: No, no, shut up, shut up-<br><br />
'''Other guy''': He's not coming back, give up.<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: Tell him it's important it's about Panda!<br><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm digesting her right now.<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: That will get him back in, I know it.<br><br />
'''Guy''': What's the important news?<br><br />
<br />
[End recording]<br />
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{{Transcription}}<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 6|Mumble Chat 6]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 8|Mumble Chat 8]]|}}<br />
<br />
==Links==<br />
* [https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBWklfakp0TGdDSkU Download]<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
<br />
[[Christian's sex joke]] - Used during this chat.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_7&diff=163099Mumble 72012-09-29T16:41:34Z<p>Irisviel: </p>
<hr />
<div>'''Mumble 7''' is the seventh of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]], held on 13 [[February 2009]].<br />
<br />
Appears to be the genesis for the "Power" videos in which Chris attempts and fails to prove his [[I AM STRONG|strength]] and [[CWC Fighter|fighting]] [[Challenge For Clyde|skill]], though these would not materialize for several months.<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
* A fan talks to Chris about putting naked posters of girls and pictures of men up in his room up to find out if his friend was a [[homo]] as Chris suggested. He tells Chris that his girlfriend dumped him over the posters and his friend ignored all of them. Chris sees nothing wrong with his advice until Julie tells him that she wouldn't like that. Chris recommends sending an anonymous letter explaining the situation and utterly fails to apologize or show concern.<br />
* Fans point out that Chris shouldn't have to show and prove that he is straight.<br />
* Chris cuts a fan off to let Julie ask a question involving [[pedofork|shota]].<br />
* Fans ask Chris to turn his radio down.<br />
* Chris uses Wal-Mart printer paper & RSVP ballpoint pen to draw, and a 50-pack of Crayola markers to color. Refuses to use color pencils or Photoshop to color, saying he prefers the markers.<br />
* Chris talks about Omicron's redone version of [[Sonichu]], accusing him of plagiarism. Says that the difference between what Omicron is doing and what he is doing is that Sonichu is his. Agrees to let Omicron continue if he credits Chris with the copyright.<br />
* '''Julie is convincing Chris to make videos proving to Clyde how strong he is.''' Chris feels that the [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|dildo breaking video]] proved this. Fans say that Chris's dildo comes apart naturally for cleaning.<br />
* '''A fan recommends making a video showing off his fighting moves to scare Clyde.'''<br />
* Chris is asked why he would use a dildo in proving that he is straight. Chris says that he is straight for crushing it, fans call him a [[homo]] for keeping it.<br />
* Chris [[lie|denies]] [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|using the dildo]], and claims that it's now broken. Fan says it could easily be reassembled. Chris is adamant that it was glued and that it took a lot of strength to pull it apart.<br />
* When asked by Julie, '''Chris admits using super-shears from Cutco to break the dildo glue, claiming to use a lot of strength in the process'''.<br />
* Fans discuss [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]]. Chris insists that it was drawn in protest of [[ED]]. He says it was anonymous, as most women have long brown hair and her eyes were censored.<br />
* Insists that [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:AngelicainGod%27sEyes.JPG the Rule 34 of Angelica Rosechu] is masturbating and enjoying it, and is using her hand to do it.<br />
* Chris thinks Billy Mays is on Home Improvement.<br />
* Chris isn't doing anything on Valentine's Day, as Julie is not there yet.<br />
* Chris discusses the the No-Redheads policy in his [[Love Quest]]. Says that redheads don't attract him unless they are not natural redheads. No piercings or tattoos allowed.<br />
* Chris is OK with blue hair.<br />
* Does a terrible Marge Simpson impersonation.<br />
* Chris impersonates Comic Book Guy and Donald Duck.<br />
* A fan presents the possibility that AIDS was sent by God to kill the [[homos]].<br />
* [[Chris and Religion|Premarital sex being forbidden in Christianity]] is discussed. Chris fumbles for an explanation.<br />
* '''A fan pretending to be black says he believes the government made AIDS to get rid of black people. Chris says that that's the kind of thing a black guy would say'''.<br />
* Premarital sex comes up again. Chris compares it to using porn to practice and learn skills for later.<br />
* The fake black fan calls Chris on his comment from earlier about black guys and AIDS. He makes the excuse that someone else said it first.<br />
* Questions on Sonichu start. Sonichu doesn't wear clothes because it's a comic. Chris isn't sure how [[Blake]] sounds. He might sound black, he might sound like Shadow the Hedgehog. The fake black fan asks why the bad guy has to be black, also mentioning [[Silvana]]. Chris says that he doesn't have to be.<br />
* Chris gets annoyed about the pronunciation of [[Rosechu]] as popularized by the Old Narrator of the [[Audiobooks]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't disagree that the Audiobooks made Sonichu more popular that he ever did'''.<br />
* He doesn't mind fanfics that don't portray Sonichu in a bad light.<br />
* The audio goes low in the main chat and a fan has a private, unrelated conversation for a few minutes.<br />
* Audio comes back as Chris is admitting that the [[B-Manajerk]] was black in real life.<br />
* Chris doesn't watch the news, so doesn't have an opinion on [[Barack Obama|Obama]]. He voted for him because he saw a documentary where he saw more of himself in Obama, namely that he was an outcast at one point.<br />
* A fan says that you should vote based on politics, not personality. Chris says that he is a moderate.<br />
* Chris doesn't know what the financial bailout is. He says that he drew the [[Sonichu 8#The Elevator Gags|racist picture]] of Obama based on his father's joke, before he saw the documentaries that made him vote.<br />
* Chris will not agree or disagree with interracial dating/marriage. He would want a white woman, but he would be [[gal pals|friends]] with others.<br />
* He'd marry an Asian.<br />
* It's not yet known if Silvana will be a good guy or if she will lose her [[pickle|dick]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't know what he wanted to be when he was younger, he's just making it up as he goes along'''.<br />
* '''Chris is keeping the name changes in the comics for legal reasons'''.<br />
* A fan suggests Slaweel cursing Rosechu to have a dick. Chris gets upset before saying that he'll think about it. The fans think it's a great idea. One considers a talking penis for Rosechu. Chris says it's a stupid idea.<br />
* Another fan asks about Chris being sacked from Wendy's. He denies scaring the child with his Donald Duck impersonation, saying that he didn't make him cry.<br />
* Chris might release his DVD one day.<br />
* A fan says that Chris has influenced underground rappers such as Immortal Technique, who has sampled him.<br />
* Chris takes requests. Impersonates MC Hammer, Dr Nick Riviera, Peter from [[Family Guy]], Mario and Sonic, butchering them all and tainting our childhood memories.<br />
* More Sonichu questions. '''Chris won't upload [[Zapina]] [[Rule 34]] because she is underage and Chris is worried about legal ramifications'''. When he is reassured that this would be legal, he says he would consider it. He will also consider Sonichu-Rosechu anal sex. Rosechu would not clean the [[pickle]] with her mouth, she would clean it off with a washcloth. He would not sell the the washcloth on EBay.<br />
* Chris calls a stop to the potty humor displayed throughout the Sonichu questions.<br />
* '''Chris denies that [[Yawning Squirtle]] is a character'''.<br />
* Fans ask for a joke. He recites a dreadful rhyme about Videogame consoles. He then tells his awful [[Christian's sex joke|sex joke]]. Fans start to tell racist jokes about [[niggos|black people]] and Mexicans. Chris calls for a stop to this.<br />
* A fan says that his friend [[mass debating|masturbated]] to the [[rule 34|adult section of Sonichu]] and is now worried that his friend is a [[homo]], as they were drawn by a man. '''Chris says that this is what he intended it for''', and they are drawings of women, so his friend is straight. He doesn't masturbate to his own drawings.<br />
* Chris reassures a fan that [[Mass Debating|masturbating]] in the same room as another man isn't gay as long as both men are thinking of women, but he would not do this.<br />
* Chris offers no comment as to what constitutes adultery.<br />
* Chris says that he is patriotic. Asked to sing the national anthem, he instead mangles a few lines of "My Country, 'Tis of Thee". He then tells a 'patriotic' joke that is insensitive to Mexicans. [[Chris and Hypocrisy|The fans call him on his "no more racist jokes" statement from earlier]].<br />
* Chris does a poor impersonation of Mr T.<br />
* Chris says that if you are married, sleeping with someone else isn't cheating if you have consent from your spouse.<br />
* Chris gives more advice on homos and recommends Axe body spray for attracting girls.<br />
* Chris has not met any celebrities, only local DJs.<br />
* Does impersonations of Homer Simpson and Bender. The two sound identical.<br />
* Chris gives dating advice: Stay calm, polite, friendly and don't let your nerves get the best of you. Say "Hello, how are you" and talk about yourself. '''[[Barbara|His mom]] told him that standing around with a sign makes him look retarded. A female fan cracks up laughing and can't stop'''.<br />
* "Those who can't, teach"<br />
* Chris says he has never even been on a date. Rejects dating suggestions from fans.<br />
* '''Chris was close with Sarah "[[PandaHalo]]" McKenzie, but hasn't heard from her in over two weeks. He heard about the fires and doesn't know if she's still alive. When a fan adds that 108 people were killed in the fires, Chris responds to the entire ordeal with [[Chris and death|"It's OK though, at least I have a good woman who's willing to be by my side at this point"]]'''.<br />
* When pushed, he says he feels remorse for the the victims of the fires and is concerned that [[Sarah Cassandra McKenzie|Panda]] is dead.<br />
* He asserts that he didn't abandon Sarah for [[Julie]].<br />
* '''A fan says that if [[PandaHalo|Sarah]] isn't alive, Chris should take solace that her perfectly barbecued remains fed the survivors. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|SHUT UP!!!]]'''<br />
* Chris says that he cares about Sarah and Julie equally and wouldn't dump Julie as a friend. A fan asks what he will do to the survivors who ate Sarah. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|"SHUT UP!!!"]] and demands that he be booted.<br />
* Fans reassure Chris that Sarah is probably OK.<br />
* Chris does abominable impersonations of Uncle Ruckus from The Boondocks and Hank Hill. '''He sings "Don't Trust Them New [[Niggos|Niggas]] Over There"'''. He also impersonates Meowth and sings the Team Rocket song.<br />
* [[Clyde]] enters. Chris refuses to answer questions and leaves.<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
===Chris proves he is straight===<br />
'''Guy:''' Chris!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all! ''[echoes]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'll be damned.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh, Chris-[gets cut off by another guy]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh you know, can't com- it's uh, can't complain.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' How's construction of the site?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' [unintelligible] so Chris<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I...I need to ask you something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yup?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh... I put those posters, of the... Playboy and everything in my room, and uh, one of my girlfriends saw it, and she got mad at me for looking at other w-... other girls, and she broke up with me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh... I'm sorry to hear that. It could-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, she's calling me a pervert. I-I don't understand this.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Did you... did you ex- did you try to explain to her about situation between you and that guy?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I... I did, and I don't think she understood.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... well, you should try, you should, uh, s-... try, uh, you should try wr-, you should tr-, uh, do you know her email address?<br /><br />
[pause]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So, uh Chris-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' A-also, wait... also, uh, the friend, I was talking about, he, uh, visited, and [typing noises] he, uh, he went into my room, and didn't even notice the posters. He just s-sat in the middle, he didn't s...sit in any uh, part of the room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Huh. Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, uh... so, yeah, I don't know. I mean, my girlfriend broke up with me, called me a pervert, said that I shouldn't be looking at other girls, I mean... I don't know what to do now.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well listen, uh, answer my question, do you have her email address?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Umm... yeah, but she won't... she won't answer me anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm... ok, hmm. Here's what you can do, uh... Do you know your girlfriend's... any of your girlfriend's [[Gal pal|gal-pals]]?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm... well, you should try to... like wr- you should write out... hmm... hmm... here's an idea. S- Write a letter to her and send it via smail mai-, via snail mail, but don't write the return address. On it.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What should I write?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just like, you know, like, they, you know, this is... you know, this is... you, uh, you put your name there, and you, it's, and then you would basically explain the situation between you and that guy, and that's why you had the posters up, well that's why you put the posters up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't really understand what was the point of the posters in the first place?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[sigh]'' it's... ''[sigh]'' if he looks at... if he, if he is very interested, if he is, if he was straight, he would uh, look at the women. Very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But he didn't even notice them. He didn't notice any of the posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, then I guess he is a [[Homos|homo]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' W...well, um, he wasn't looking at anything, not even the guy posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Hmm... He's not blind, surely.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, like, what is he, is he like, uh...I don't know.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I don't know either, man. But, you know at the moment I would suggest you, uh, write the- write the letter to your girlfriend, send the mail, don't write your return address on the envelope, and, uh, mail it to her.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Also my mom saw the posters and she got offended, she's like really religious and st- she said that like, uh, you know, lust is a sin or some shit. Oh, like she said, she's like all against the, the uhh, the like, Playboy in my room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, your- apparently your mom hasn't been [beeps] that open minded that time. So, you know, give her time to reh-cover, she'll uh, she might op- she might open up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I don't think that was a good idea though, I mean, w-why did-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -you suggest it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I was trying to see if he, to, I was trying to s-help you figure out if your uh, if your friend was a homo or not.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I know, but, do you have uh, [Fans talking] Playboy posters in your room?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unclear] I'm very forward.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I have uh, poster of some, of uh, I have a poster in my room of uh, some uh, naked girls I got from adamandeve.com as a bonus.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Then, nobody says anything about it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[clears throat]'' Well, I didn't really have too many oppor- too many people in my room. So, it's kind of like in a hard to notice place.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Um, wondering, um, If you showed anyone, wouldn't they be offended?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe, maybe not, [Fan grunts] it just depends on their point of view.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I wouldn't want the same thing that happened to me to happen to you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I hear you there. Uh, just to so just sound clear... Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie, are you there?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ok, uh, would you be offended if you saw such a poster in my room?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''[breaks up]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, What will, what was that? [Echoes]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie'''</span> Yes I would, kind of.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well that's no problem, I can take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, see that's what I'm talking about, I mean...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, that's why I asked Julie right now, because I respect her. So, because she said that she would, I will take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I've been thinking, um...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you have... [unclear] Chris, I don't think you should look at other woman.[sic] In my opinion.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I see, Julie. Well that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I...I respect that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' She might get jealous, I mean, that's what happened to my...my girlfriend.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, that's fine Julie, I respect your, I respect that. Just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey, can I ask you a question? If uh, he's done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, uh, one more thing, um, you know I've been thinking, uh, I don't really think you need, you know, posters and stuff like,<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' to prove you're straight, I mean, if you're straight, that's all there is to it i-if, am I right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think you're right.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I...I mean, you shouldn't have to prove that you're straight.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> You're right.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I m-mean [line breaks temporarily] Y-you shouldn't have to reassure yours-self. You should just be knowing it, and nothing anybody says, should get very, uh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, it's ve-ah-very-but you see, I have like, I have that [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] in my room, it's just, so that like, you know, for in case I have any-for in case I have any random thoughts, on account really, to tempt me.<br /><br />
''[unintelligible mix of chatter from most participants trying to get their word in]''<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I mean, even if they're random thoughts, even if they're random thoughts, if you know you're ''positive'' about it, you shouldn't have to look at anything to make sure.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, usually.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay. Uh, moving on from all this homosexuality, uh, I have one question, uh- [gets cut off by Chris in the background] ...never mind, [fat douchebag?]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey, ah, let Julie ask a question, let Julie ask her question.<br /><br />
<br />
===7:08 Julie asks about shotacon===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, I was watching you on the Internet yesterday and, what's a shotacon?[slightly cut off]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...I'm sorry, uh-y, I'm sorry, you got cut off, what was that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> What's a sho-[cuts off again]-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...What's a...''short''?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Shot-[cuts off third time, pretty obvious she's saying ''shota'']-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dude, shota.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, shota.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ssshhhh...shota?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, S-H-O-A-T-A [sic].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, it's a word he found online.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, [baby?], yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never heard of that word.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I dunno, if you want to look it up, you can probably find out on an online dictionary...<br /><br />
''[pause, and a weary sigh from someone other than Chris]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'll-I'll take a look. Hang on.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I know some Japanese and I think I've heard that somewhere, like in a magazine or something.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, it's some of that Japanese shit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Probably is. Three moments, I'll look it up.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Okay!<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's radio is audible]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Whoops, that was the wrong one. The wrong bookmark.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' S-H-O-T-A.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I know, I just get the wrong bookmark for...place I wi-for like...dictionary-type website that I have.<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's keyboard taps are audible]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uhhh...Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, now that Julie's done with her question, I also had one.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' He has to find what that means first.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, ''I'm sorry''.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Shit, ah shit, I've just found it on Wikipedia. It's, uh, it's a ma-it's a Japanese name. It's a name of a person. In Japan.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Really.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a Japanese name. I think it's-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh no no, I think you're looking at the wrong thing, it's S- S-H-O-T-A-C-O-N.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> S-H- I mean- O-T-A-C-O-N? Shotacon?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's the same thing, just put C-O-N at the end.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I've read it in a dictionary before, can't remember what it means...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, oh! Okay, here it is, uh..."shotacon, sometimes shortened to shota, is Japanese slang of the phrase 'Shotaro Complex'"...uh..."that describes the attraction to young boys or an individual with such an attraction".<br /><br />
''[Disgusted reactions heard]''<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh my god, what the fuck?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' There's lots of sick people. Y'all are gonna get ricked?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Someone from 4 cent garbage came in and told us to look that up, I didn't-I didn't even want to.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess he's a homo...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Don't worry I banned him already.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Um, Chris, Vivian wants to know if you can like, turn your radio down a bit, it's distracting.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yes, please turn it down.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I thought that was quiet enough, here.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, no, the lady'll probably pick it up<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Alright cool. Merci.<br /><br />
<br />
===10:21 Another fan asks about art supplies===<br />
<br />
'''Another Fan:''' Okay, um, I have a question, um, I like to draw—interrupted by mumbling—I like to draw comics and such, I mean I want to start up a webcomic. What kind of materials do you use?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, like, you mean for drawing?<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well mostly I just use like, uh, paper without lines, like, computer printer paper you can get in, like, Wal-Mart, for an inexpensive price in multiples.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then I use like an RES—RSVP-brand pen with the black ink.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh okay, is it like, um, a gel pen or a ballpoint pen or-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like a ballpoint, it's like a ballpoint pen.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What do you use to color?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I use Crayola brand markers.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would like to—I would—I would—I would recommend getting the Super Tip 50-pack which you can also find at the Wal-Mart.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay. I-[interrupted by someone else on chat]<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's basically-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' At Wal-Mart I usually get the 24-color RoseArts. Those are—those do pretty good too.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhh, Vivian, just so you—just so you know, I'm using the microphone that came with Hey You, Pikachu for Nintendo Sisty-Four [sic].<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, yeah no, no offense, but uh, personally I prefer like, colored pencils and shit cause-[Chris mumbling is heard]-they're like easier to erase. Photoshop [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If you want to use colored pencils that's fine, I'm not, uh, saying that you have to use Crayola markers-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why don't you use colored pencils? They're really good, you should try one on like, at least one page, just try one. One page with just colored pencils.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But um, actually, you can—you can scan your drawings and then color—color them in like, Photoshop or something. [rest of chat murmurs in agreement] That looks really professional, and really good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I prefer using the markers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's just that I-I mean—I mean I've tried—I mean I've colored with colored pencils before, and I just feel best with using markers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I have a question, um, uh, the Hey You Pikachu microphone, how does that work on the, you're using that on your computer? Did you say?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah it's just, yeah, it's like you plug it into uh, into the basic microphone jack.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh, yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Excuse me, I have a nice little Plantronics headset.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Hey Chris can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah, hang on a second, uh... uh, Omicron, that's uh, you're basically, uh, you're basically plagiarizing here. You're even using, uh, parts of my original drawings to, uh, make up your so called real ones and, you're just—you're just parroting—you're just plagiarizing-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's dirty and illegal.<br /><br />
[Unintelligible mumbling]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, you said so yourself, you're being illegal. And plus, and plus I'm-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, isn't combining Sonic with Pikachu the same thing?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, but, but but also, look at this, also I'm looking at this site here, it said, he's claiming the copyright for himself, but he's, but he's not. I mean that's like, but he's, he—he says<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' You need to ban him immediately.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, ban him immediately.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh wait wait wait wait wait...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah maybe you should check-[interrupted by loud noise, probably Chris]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well he said that, he's saying that all of Sonichu material is copyrighted by him, when it's clearly not.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah but you use Sonic and Pikachu, and you copyrighted it-<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' He just offered to give you credit-[interrupted by noisy chatter]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean, I put, I mean, yeah but, I mean, I'm talking about the—the Omnicron [sic] guy here, that's like, just put this link here.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh he offered to give you credit-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes that's the same thing you did.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well no no, he, no-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We decided-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No he's plagiarizing MY Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We just decided [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris it's, it's a parody, kinda like Sonichu is.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but he—yeah, but he's saying, he said—he—on his front page he says, all Sonichu material-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah but he's, he just offered to change it, so are you okay with that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> By changing it to Sonichu X-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, he said he'll give you credit instead of claiming it for himself.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, uh, yeah I would appreciate that, that would be better, yeah, if... he changed that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Alright cool.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Problem solved.<br /><br />
<br />
===15:02 Chris talks about dildos to prove his strength===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes Julie.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you think you could tell everyone about my idea? And, since you're going to do it do you think you could tell everyone so they could look out for it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, your idea... um, oh oh oh, yeah, just basically a video of me standing up to Clyde and showing him how strong I am, doin' a few kicks for the camera or something-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, you should throw some punches, show him what you're made of, you know?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Kick, punch, it's all in the mind ''etc.''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I basically... I pretty much did that when I...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Let him talk, c'mon!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I pretty much did - already proved my strength when I... ripped that... ''dildo'' in half.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Foreign-Sounding Guy:''' Most dildos come apart for cleaning.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' C'mon.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but that thing was screwed together at the seam.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok listen to me...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris...<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' Eh Chris!<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ...could you do a like further test of your strength for me?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''stress sigh'' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I wanna see how strong you are please.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...That's fine, I can do that.<br /><br />
'''Other Fan:''' I mean that's ok, you showed your strength, but you should show her your moves. Like show her, like, what kind of moves you can do.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, let me tell you a story about how this'll work, ok.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' See, my, uh, one of my cousins, uh, this guy at school, kept, y'know, picking on him, calling him gay and stuff, and trying to fight with him, and my cousin told him to sss- y'know, one day, the guy said "Hey man, I'm gonna beat you up" and my cousin said "Look, if I show you some of my moves, I'll prove to you I can kick your ass in a fight" and so my cousin, y'know, he stepped back and, he took, uh, he took Tae Kwon Do, and he did a couple moves, y'know? He just stood there for like five minutes just doing his moves, and, y'know, some punches and kicks and... The guy just backed right off; he didn't even want to talk to him any more. So I think that should work.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> All right, well I'll try that. I'll try that.<br/><br />
'''Guy:''' All right. Sounds good.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br?><br />
'''Fan:''' You try- you always mention about how you're straight but yet in your video about you crushing a dildo, uh, doesn't that kinda like, y'know, not help your cause?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, it proves I'm straight because...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' But you have a dildo.<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I got it free with an order on adameve.com<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' But you ''kept'' it and shit. That ain't cool.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' What I don't... Why were there batteries in...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh yeah Chris, why ''were'' there batteries in it? Why did you keep it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I mean...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it wasn't an easy thing for me to sell, right off the bat, or even to make a profit, so...<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In fact in a way it's a good thing I kept it, cause it allowed me to be able to break it, like I did.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes but why would you keep it?<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why would you keep it?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I woulda saved it for my sweetheart, if she'd wanted it. To use it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Aaaahhh.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But if I were there wouldn't you prefer the real deal?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Some things that metal just can't replace.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Yeah.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I heard that.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' You didn't use it did you?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No I did not.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Did you just throw all the ones you had away?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I only had that one. And there you go, I ri- there you go, I broke it apart.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you just, like, ''take'' it apart, I mean, it did...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' ...seem to come apart, like, screwed on...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I did not take it apart, that thing was glued at the seam. I had to put a lot of strength into breaking it at the middle there.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, but I think, um, showing your moves would be better.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Right.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Clyde would mess with you if you show him you can kick his ass.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey, Chris's a muthafuckin' ''gangsta''!<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Blap blap.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yes, Chris will fuck Clyde's shit up.<br /><br />
(awkward pause)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait, Chris, didn't you say you used a - didn't you say you used scissors to break the dildo?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I pretty much did have to so I could break that ''glued seam''.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, I thought you broke it with your hands.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well I- yeah well I would have but it was dang glued at the seam, so I clipped straight in with the scissors I had.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a pair of Super Shears from [[Cutco]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(feigning interest)'' Huh.<br /><br />
<br />
===19:50 Chris defends his Rule 34===<br />
<br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, let's talk about something else. Uh, Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whenever the announcement of the adult Sonichu page, when I looked at your gallery, very nice stuff, you know, I see a picture of what looks like you with a Sonichu, uh, medallion. Like, and, who's that one girl, exactly?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Who, [[Megan]]?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I thought it was, like, [[Crystal]], cause of the hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, it was - it was originally drawn to be Megan but I censored her eyes to, uh, port- to protect her identity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Mmmmmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''(laughing)'' That's stupid! (?) That's so silly.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I drew that after I found the ED page in November.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you say that?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In protest against it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thought you were going to get rid of it anyway.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I tore up the original drawing, I, in- into squares, and I put in in an envelope.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you upload it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you do that shit? Like, and...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I understand Rosechu, but, like y'know, why, like, something that's from real life. That's the problem (?)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's not necessarily from real life, it depends on you inter- it depends on your interpretation, I mean it's hardly- I mean, '''most women have long brown hair, and the eyes are censored''', so...<br/><br />
(laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''Most'' women?!?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I remember in that one video you were saying it was Megan.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because it broke, because it end up, because it the end it broke up my friend - broke up my friendship eve, my uh, friendship with Megan.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um, can I ask you a question? In the third picture, with [[Angelica Rosechu]], what is... what's happening, is... God... doing...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nope. She's masturbating. And she's enjoying it.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But she has no hands there. How's she doing it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' She's ''enjoying'' it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But she does... She does...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah but how's she doing it? She doesn't have her hands there.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> She does have her hands, she's... ''(stress sigh)'' She's... like most women would be able to do the same thing.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thing it's the angle, Julie. I think it's the angle you were looking at it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah plus uh, the picture wasn't, uh, very - wasn't as clear as, like, you know, I would have liked to have had it, uh, I mean, I had that file for a while, and it...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah some of those are kinda blurry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, some deg- some degraded.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ? a good question, have you drawn anything... of... have you drawn anything like that with me? Cause I would actually like to see, if you did. If so, could you, and let me see? I, uh, sorry, that's very rude to ask.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm sorry, let me answer this guy. Yeah, well, I made a retraction video later saying that I- I disowned that address.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ah, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just after that guy hacked into it and changed to it to suck. And as such.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hang on, I'm gonna take a look at that... My Youtube...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I like this song.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What song?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' The song that's playing in the background of, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what do you think of, uh, what do you think of that guy who advertises products, Billy Mays? What do you think of him?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... Billy... Oh! Yeah he's an ok guy, I watched him on Home Improvement.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Billy Mays?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, that was another guy on Home Improvement, Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No that was the same guy. That was the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Really?!? Let's look up. IMDB, go. ''(sound of typing)''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Believe me, it's the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, I really enjoyed your, um, adult, uh, section of the site.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... okey dokey, very good. Aaahh, trying to figure out how to update the link on this thing here. Oh, maybe under here. Oh there it is, thank God (?), update right now.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(singing)'' You spin me right round baby, right round...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (joining in) Like a record baby, right round round round<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's a classic, I can't help in man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There you are, updated. It's finally fixed.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Actually that was Richard Karn on Home Improvement, not Billy Mays.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well my mistake, I mean the guy had the beard and uhh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh yeah I can understand.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And the voice sounds- and the voice sounds the same...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah. They sound the same.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There's a matter of interpretation apparently I misinterpreted so I will admit that I was wrong.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah see we all make mistakes, don't be too hard on yourself.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unintelligible babble or singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you gotten any fan art submissions or notable? For the uh- webpage?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I got one today... It's like mostly a drawing of that uh that uh- of the fan herself.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -got in the snail mail today.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -Sunday.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hmmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What are you doing for this Valentine's day Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhm... I'm sorry, what was that question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What will you be doing this year on Valentine's day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm depends...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ahhh, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm.<br /><br />
Fan: Surely a man of such magnitude as yourself are going to be doing something important, aren't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Magnitude? Way to choose the words buddy.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Vocabulary talent.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, cause I don't have Julie over here yet.<br /><br />
(Reactions of OHs and AHs)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If she was here...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible) -play games.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Or we could just uh... talk.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Ehehehehe. Maybe... uh... why no redheads?<br /><br />
'''Other Woman:''' Yeah?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I was trying to think about that when the other guy asked that question. Uh... I was trying to think up that unh... mmmm... Uhhhh, redheads just don't be very- tract me so much.<br /><br />
Several: Uh, ah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's- it's- a- pi- a possibility that they're dyed.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmmmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But yeah y'know natural redheads enh, yeah, just don't really turn me on as much.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I see...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you thought about girls with um, highlights?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... (pause) aaahhhh... what turns me on hhh- (inhales) (pause) obviously the women.<br /><br />
'''Man:''' Gotta have the women. (?)<br /><br />
'''Guy''': What about piercings or tattoo?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, neither of those.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhhh-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris! How bout like non-orange hair, not like... no, never mind. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... oh... okay... hmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait Chris! How do you feel about blue hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Blue hair's okay, otherwise I wouldna- Otherwise I wouldn't've liked Sailor Mercury.<br /><br />
'''British? guy:''' That is true, she does have blue hair.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' She's a very fine character. There is no way to deny it.<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Blue hair is OFF DA HOOK!!!<br/><br />
<br />
===28:35 Chris impersonates various cartoon characters===<br />
<br />
'''British??? guy:''' Doesn't Marge Simpson have blue hair as well?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (in some kind of insane voice) Oh yeah! Marge Simpson has blue hair and it's as tall as the Empire State building!!!<br /><br />
(Some HMMs UHs and UMs follow)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yo Chris!! Can you do some impersonations for us?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Oh we'd love to hear that!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just did Marge Simpson.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah you're really talented.<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(Several people talking at once)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> -they're really good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Do another SimpsonsChris, how about Comic Book Guy?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Mmmmhmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I'm very indeed. Oh aren't we all promiscuous and whatnot. I like Batman and Robin, oh look! Stan Marsh has come into the thing again - I forget that guy's name, that guy who did the Marvel comics.<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Stan Lee. (Pause) Chris do your Donald Duck impression.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Everybody have fun (incoherent and scary quacking)<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris you should work for Disney.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's good Chris.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Have you ever considered being a voice actor?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Errrrrp... possibly, I'm not sure.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (incoherent, cut off by Chris)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent... another cartoon voice)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris, you're a Christian, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I was just wondering-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahm actu-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -do you just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm actually a Methodist church.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome, I was just wondering: Do you think AIDS was sent by god to kill the homos or do you think that it's just an accident or something man-made?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thou- the thought never occurred to me... thought never occurred to me.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' can you do an impression of Arnold Schwarzenegger?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hold- the question...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Let Chris answer the question.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thought- the thought never occurred to me about what you just said about the AIDS there mmmm... but y'know, it's a possibility and I will not agree nor disagree with it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I was just wondering I mean, I've had that discussion with some of my Christian friends. I just wanted to get your opinion, thank you.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmhhh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think (clears throat) I think Omicron has a point and you did tell me you went to a methodist church didn't you? So that's-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well th- well my Methodist church is uh more loose on- is not as strict on uh- on uh sex.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris I don't know- I don't know that much about religion in the States but I don't think there is a looser Meth- Methodist church. God makes the rules Omicron says.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, hmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well, you know personally I think that the government made AIDS to kill off all the brothers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whoa, whoa... That's what the blacks always say.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. (pause) I'm going to agree, that sounds like something that uh... well, a black guy would say.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So your church is kinda of uh- they let you do- their kinda loose on the whole moral restrictions?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... (pause) uhhh... that's... what's the question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Your church they- you said they're kind of more uh- y'know they're less strict on the whole moral thing, like, as far as sexuality goes? Right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -ah basically.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But y'know, uhh, I thought you're supposed to listen to the Bible or whatever not, y'know, not necessarily- no, never mind.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (interrupts)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, there's also a uh, there's also a- think about this uh, if you uh- if you- if you were a think uh- you have to find for yourself a good meaning behind uh- good meaning behind watching pornography to uh- like teach how it- how to do this and that when you actually get around to doing it...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's all ???<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's all's considered education for yourself.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' How is that realistic at all?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, it's uh- not a really good thing to learn from, trust me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It can be done before marriage as well as long as me and my sweetheart really love each other very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But not in Christianity.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But all I'm saying is y'know, porn is completely, completely unre- unrealistic I mean you can't really learn anything from it.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It gives- it gives you enough ideas.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unclear)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (incoherent) porn.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' When you actually have sex, it's nothing like porn.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe not like you, you not gonna do it-<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' You can't do it immediately- immediately anal sex cause most women are not very happy with anal sex and also...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay, shut up<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' -and also weird-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Shut up.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Yes.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And... that wasn't cool, like...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That was uncalled for...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, like, suthin' a BLACK MAN would say...<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' That's racist man...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, somebody said it on here first before I did.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Does that make it ok?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, I think he's trying to make it clear that- I dunno.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I typically agree with that guy.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So nothing g- it doesn't make it ok.<br /><br />
(incoherent)<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling) I wi- I'm sorry, I take it back.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(unclear)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Guys can we get back to Sonichu, Please?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah this is getting ridiculous.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unclear) -Sonichu actually.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Anyway, my question is that: why does Sonichu not wear clothes while Rosechu and the other Rosechus do wear clothes? And underwear?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Aaaaaaaaaamp... It's like uh- it's basically a cartoon and it doesn't really matter, it's like... mm... think about this: Most cartoon characters wear at least one article of clothing. At least one article. And uh- it's like Yogi Bear who just wears a necktie and a hat.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 35.14)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Other Guy:''' I think it would be cool if all the Sonichus and Rosechus got together and they and- they all formed a big team and they had special uniforms or something, kinda like the X-men.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Or Power Rangers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh yeah, I don't do- I don't do well- I'm not in- no uniforms. It's a uniform and other Sonichus and Rosechus.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'm just wondering if you'd do another impression: What does Blachu sound like? Uh, Black Sonichu? Or Blake?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eeeeuuunh... Eh... ahhhh...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Can you imitate it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... I'm not sure... uhhhhm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Like does he sound black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Possibly, but I'm not certain. I'm not leaning towards it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I'd like to hear it, but if you don't want...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just never- I just never really thought about that. I'd say that he possibly sounds similar to uh, y'know Shadow the hedgehog. But he could possibly sound, black. He could. Don't quote me on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' All right, I was just wondering if you'd do his voice but...<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Hey why does the BAD guy gotta be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never said the bad guy "has to" be black. (pause) I mean, look at the- the range of villanies, I mean there's black and whites and uh... male females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I noticed that uh- Silvana's also... black lookin'.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just decided to color her black because she was born- she came from outer space from a black egg, which was the- which came out of the rainbow.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah, I was also wonderin' about that like-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I- I- I-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' If Silvana came out of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes it's-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Why would she be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' I mean like black ain't part of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like the black sheep of the family. Y'know you put all the colors together and it does become black.<br /><br />
(unintelligible reactions)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -like a brownish-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) is a (unintelligible) color.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Maybe it's because she's from space and there's not a lot of light in space and it's dark or something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah that- a uh yeah- that's one of the-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hmmm.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhm, did you look at the link of my friend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, ummmm...<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Yeah, since you love blue hair.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh- no I haven't looked at it and I don't wanna make Julie feel jealous if I did- if I went and did.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Julie would mind.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhhh...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You look at pornography don't you?<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' (mumble)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, that- that was two syllables "Rose-chu". You don't- don't add- don't say the "e" it's just "Rosechu".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah you went over this last chat.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>(I don't know, it sounds like "narrator")<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sounds like he says "narrator" again)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh... I was just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, well, obviously the uh- the narrator who did those audio books was incorrect. Specially since I never gave that person the approval to do the audiobooks.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think it's just a fan project and I think he-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' and I think he might have one of the West coast dialects. I know that the South they say y'all but over here-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well obviously he lied-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -different. I'd be proud if they made one of my projects into an audiobook though. That means that there are a lot of fans out there that really like it.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Ay.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' They're not selling to try and make any money off it. They're not trying to rip you off. They always made sure- they always narrate the first page by saying "Christian Weston Chandler" so they're not trying to cheat you or anything.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' The people know you're making it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I- I hear that. I just, apparently they misin- misinterpreted the (audio breaks up) name Rosechu. Or mispronounced it. Misinterpreted, mispronounce- fairly the same thing in that situation... possibly. To answer that question... possibly.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uh, Vivian said that the audiobooks made Sonichu way popular that- than you could ever ever do on your own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I will not disagree with the statement. And I appreciate her help.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris. Would you be offended if a fan wrote a fanfiction about Sonichu?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Faaanfiction... if it's- if it's not demeaning or makes them look stupid. Then it's fine- it's fine. (pause) Like I did mind when, shoot, what's his name? That guy... uhhhh... that guy that the uhhhh... did the animations, on his computer.<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' You did mind or you didn't?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Animations???<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think I know what he's talking about. Are you talking about the um...<br /><br />
<br />
(background noise begins)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' Well the original play was a Greek play. Where they're all y'know... Greeks... and crazy stuff happens and they're all runnin' around in togas. So if you ever wanna see the movie "A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum" it was a classic and it had some real classic people from the 50s and 60s in it. Kinda like "It's a MAD MAD MAD MAD World". Sort of a classic old school movie from funny old school world. First color movie type thing. But that'll be a high school play. You'll wanna see that. You might actually enjoy it. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
(inaudible response)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' You never know that might be fun to do. Well I guess that wouldn't work on the weekend then... you gotta...<br /><br />
<br />
'''(FOR THOSE OF YOU WONDERING WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON, IT APPEARS THAT THERE WAS SOME TECHNICAL PROBLEM THAT CAUSED ANOTHER MUMBLE CHANNEL TO BE RECORDED WHILE THE CONVERSATION WITH CHRIS BECAME BARELY AUDIBLE BACKGROUND NOISE. INSTEAD ALL THAT CAN BE HEARD IS SOME BUTTFACE YAMMERING ABOUT FILMS AND TELEVISION SHOWS. I'M NOT GOING TO KEEP TRANSCRIBING IT. CHRIS IS STILL TALKING AND ANSWERING QUESTIONS, BUT NOTHING CAN BE UNDERSTOOD OVER THESE GUYS.)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''(AT 42.56 THE AUDIO SUDDENLY RESUMES NORMALLY)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Unknown person:''' Uh you-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I uh- noticed he's another BLACK villain.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah in real life he was black. Without meaning any offense to the uh- black guy in general, cause you've noticed, among the Jerkops there's uh- we got black's and white's, males and females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(several people jump in at once)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) -you've never drawn a female officer before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well y'know uhhh... uhhh, comic book number 7, near the end. Near the end of the time travel episode. Uhh, I have no opinion about what Obama's doing cause I don't watch the news.<br /><br />
Accented woman: But you voted for him, didn't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes I voted for him because I saw myself in him when I com- when I saw both the documentaries and downloaded them for the Playstation Network between Obama and McCain. I mean voted for a person I saw more of myself of-<br /><br />
Accented woman: You usually vote for someone based on their political leanings, not how you view them. As I were Republican, I voted for John McCain. Not because I liked him but because I- he had the same political views as me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basi- basically I'm a moderate.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh, I see. Um, I was wondering. I was reading opinions: do you agree with his financial bailouts?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm, I don't even know what it is. So I can't disagree or agree.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Well, to make it short um, it's about uh- the government- President Obama is planning to uh- a new one- (cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You got cut off there.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uhh, ok, we lost him.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yo, Chris, uh, do you, you didn't just vote for Obama cause he was black, did you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I did not vote for him because he was black. I voted for him cause I saw myse- because I saw myself in him. In like, similar lifestyles. And I saw that he was a good man, I mean after all, com- I saw- I saw I watched both of the A&E documentaries, before I can- before I knew who I would vote for.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 45.29)'''<br /><br />
<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris:, Chris what did you see in him that you say in your self?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Like for one thing we were like outcasts, at least one point in our lives.<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Wait, wait hold up earlier you said that you thought he would probably paint the white house black.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh oh that was my father’s joke he said that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Is your father a racist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but you see I drew that for him before I saw the documentaries so respectfully withdrew that comic page.<br /><br />
'''???:''' does your father hate black people.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Not necessarily but it’s just how my father just how my father that does not reflect in any way that’s how he felt (annoying ass noise in the background)<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Man that racist.<br /><br />
'''??? :''' Hey Chris I so the ahh saw the Sonichu and Rosechu love sack that you put up and I thought if was pretty cool for (you adult friends?) I just had a question though: do you have any plans in the comic to have romance between you and one of the hedgehogs I mean-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Yelling) No no no<br /><br />
'''???:''' -we would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' I mean is was just wondering because there are fans how would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Now- now that you answered the his question my kind of relates to his what are your thoughts on inter racial breeding and marriages?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would not agree of disagree with them but in my personal preference I would fell- I would feel more comfortable in having a full relationship with a white woman but I am willing- am still willing to be friends and acquaintances and give and have respect for the black women as well.<br /><br />
'''???:''' What about Asians like Japanese?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I’m ok with them as well (yelling) a once.<br /><br />
'''???:''' So would you get married with a Japanese woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hhhmmmm I would have, yes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> but I’m giving Julie to opportunity here.<br /><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: Julie’s a lucky woman.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris, I was just wondering, is Silvana gonna become one of the good guys, like- like Black Sonichu did before?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There’s a possibility but I have not given that a co- I have not confirmed that yet.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Uh, is she gonna lose the male sexual parts and become a full-fledged woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhhmmm possibly but I haven’t given that- I haven't given that thought either.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Also um I was reading (?Phillip’s?) question, Chris what did you want to be when you were little?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don’t remember, I do not remember. I’m just making it as I go basically.<br /><br />
'''???:''' is there ever gonna be like uh, an end to your sonichu series like a finale?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hmmmm I don’t know, probably would not.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Oh so it keeps going and going?<br /><br />
???: You ever consider making comic about the history of CWCville?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhmmmm an episode dedicated towards that possibility.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris are you going to keep the name changes that you made or are you going back to the original names?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahhh ya I’m keeping the name changes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' But you know umm Nintendo was umm, y'know, they sent you a letter you never really talk about it further.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but at least- at least- the hel- they use to benefit me for the fact that uh allowed me to fix noting in that sense so I couldn’t be sued by such people in that sense.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 50 min)'''<br /><br />
<br />
(scattered reactions)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So the name changes were good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So uh, Chris I was wondering if uh Mary- Mary Lee Walsh Or I guess the new name: Ryam Sla- I don't know-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Sla-weel.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Slaweel, thank you. Uhm, if she were to use her magic to curse Rosechu with a penis, would Soni- what- wou- would that test the relationship between Sonichu and her? While they were fighting the battle to have it removed, I'm just curious.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... Firstly uh, she does not- she does not have the power ch- to do that.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I just thought you know, remember you did the story about 4-cent-garbage and drawing all the- the picture and-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah you what, that's one- that's one thing: drawing them, but not actually putting them on the character.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Cause I think that would be like an epic story though, like to actually have a quest-<br /><br />
Fan: I'll second that.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -to go to have that penis removed from Rosechu. I mean it's a test of romance between her and Sonichu.<br /><br />
(muttering)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And when that prevails and the penis is removed and everybody- everybody lives happily ever after. Y'know that would be awesome.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnnnnnh, I dunno I have to- I dunno I have to think about that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It is a really good idea. I like it.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I do too.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah, that's good.<br /><br />
Other fan: It could show just how much Rosechu means to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I'll- I'll consider it but I'm not making any promises.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' We understand.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(several talking at once)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -decided on that subject?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm working on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' If you actually decide to go forward with that story? Do you think maybe- maybe you could give her a talking penis?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!!!<br /><br />
(laughter from various people)<br /><br />
(unintelligible responses)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ok, I think- I think we've talked enough about that one guys.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I have a question that doesn't involve penises.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Anyway, my question is since we've been hearing lot of vicious lies and slander about this, could you confirm exactly why you've been fired from your job at Wendy's Chris? Cause we've been hearing all sorts of- of crazy things and we wanna know the truth.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmmmmmm... well, firstly, what have you heard?<br /><br />
'''Other guy:'''Well we heard that uh you... we've heard so many things like you helped a small child and you did a Donald Duck impersonation and you scared the child.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... also that- also that is correct but I did not scare the child. The child was tired, I was only trying ta- I was only trying to make the child feel better. That's a little amusement. But I did not make the child cry, the child was already- was just tired.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' So you didn't help them cut their food and... yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I did help them- help them get their food to- by giving them uhh, by giving them bags and a top for their baked potato boat.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris, when will um, the pictures of Zapina, appear on the um, 18 plus page?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that was a deleted scene! That was a deleted scene.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Why was it deleted?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basically, hhh... y'c- y'cant' really have it if you don't have Rosechu working to take the- working to take the pictures of herself up in the bathroom. Cause like can't have one without the other.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaahhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I don't know if this is a good question but there's something I wonder about that- we kind of have this DVD you made and... y'know, we never unfortunately got... but I'm curious um... do you ever plan to release it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I'd pay money for that, I think everyone else here would probably pay money for it too.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Indeed.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (breaking up) I wanna ask a question.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I hear it's also on YouTube.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris do you know that you've influenced the rap/hip hop community?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmh... uh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I just wanted to mention that because I saw some YouTube videos and it- and- and from some underground hip hop artists such as Immortal Technique and they've sampled some of your voice audio complaining about your struggles with uhm... with the school board, with the security guards and they were- they felt so empowered that they actually took those words and mad'em into a very powerful rap song. How does that- how is your reaction to that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhhhh... basically I have not watched those videos so... I don't have an opinion.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I will provide you a link to that, hold on a moment.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh that's ok, actually I uh, did sample one. The one where they basically played the parody from "Can't touch this".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, no, trust me it's waaay more serious than that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I still haven't heard of- heard of what you're talking about.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Nevermind.<br /><br />
(rustling and moving noises)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do an impression of MC Hammer?<br /><br />
(more clicking and rustling)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Can't touch this do do do doo do dooo Can't touch this! Do do do dooo do do do... can't touch this.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' That was- heheheh.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Awesome.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you- can you do Dr. Nick Riviera from the Simpsons?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> HIIII EVERYBODY!<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hello Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hi Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hi Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that should say Dr. Nick cause that's who I'm imitatin'.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''???:''' That uh-<br /><br />
'''???:''' HELLOOO EV'RYBODY!!!!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well that-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hi Dr. Nick!<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Thank you, I love the Simpsons.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do... Peter from Family Guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhenhenhenh... Hey Lois! Look at me! I'm just (unclear) you nose, and I'm eatin' your nose.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh that's dead on.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Oh would you- Omicron's been interested in tis- would you actually make a documentary like- like your other DVD but make your daily life?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... I'm... yeah I might but uh... I'm not su- I'm not sure bout it at the moment.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaaaaaaanh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris can you do Mario? You know from Super Mario?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hay paisano! How you doin' mistah hedgehog!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's very good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then Sonic- then Sonic would say "what?!?"<br /><br />
(giggling)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris do you have any plans to make a video of yourself taking a dump on a Hexbox?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No! That's gross.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Yeah that was pretty sick right there.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Let's ban him.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's bad enough I cut in half with an axe.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> and one of the elevator jokes...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Oh we remember that, that was a classic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And I earned a trophy for that.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmm...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Yeah, I remember that, it was destroying a Hexbox by cutting it in half if I remember...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' If I were to draw nude Zapina fanart, uhm, would you put them on the site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... uhh, your- you uh- free to draw them at your- at your own- own preference, but I will not be- I will not put it on the website because- cause- because I will not want to break any laws of having underage portrayals- portrayals of underage nudity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Isn't Dot a child?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry... what?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dot, from Animaniacs.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' So-uh- uhm- I think I looked up somewhere that um, drawings do not count, they're just lines on paper not like real pictures that are horrible.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah I believe-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Draw-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (cut off)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Those illustrations do not count as child pornography. Because with drawing it's art- it's artistic merit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Welll... I dunno, I guess it depends I have to- but- y'know you could do the drawing and I'll think- I'll consider it.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, would it be possible to get any pictures of Sonichu having anal sex with Rosechu?<br /><br />
(pause... thumps and feedback)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm considering that but...<br /><br />
'''Accented woman''' Who keeps letting this person in? You are very offensive.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -and and, if you draw those, do you think that Rosechu would actually clean Sonichu's penis off with her mouth (laugh) w-when they're done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nah, no, I don't think so, I think- I think- I think it would be unh- yeah w-wash it off with a washcloth.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Do you think then, at that point then they would sell the washcloth on eBay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!<br /><br />
(people talking over each other)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, no, no more potty humor, all right?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah alright, okay<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Unrelated to party humor, I want to ask that in your Springbreak uhh Issue of Sonichu you had an introduction of a, of new character, the [[Yawning Squirtle|squirtle]] and I wanna ask<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:''' (interrupting)</span> No, that's, no, no, no, that's not just a character, I was, I was not introducing a new character, I was just doing like a poster thing for a bubble speak under one, I thought I just draw some water type pokemon un-in there<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I understand but the thing is there is huge cult following for that character and I strongly suggest that you should capalize on that and, and make him to a main character<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eh... No, I don't think so<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's just sleeping Squirtle work- waking up!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, people just thought he was really cute and yawning Squirtle, I don't know, I heard someone say, man wouldn't it be great if he would be that [[Autistic|dopey]] sidekick that he'd come and they'd be like, like, he'd come in and say something silly after someone did something and they would be like "Squirtle"!<br /><br />
People laughing and talking over each other<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um...<br /><br />
???: Yo, it makes you *unintelligible* (Chris and someone talk over another)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yes Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I'm asking you about... Hm... Never mind, I lost my train of thought. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's okay. These guys made me lose a train of thought as well. Doesn't multiple inputs.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yes, kinda lotta control here. I might- I may have to... never mind<br /><br />
Silence<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I never lose my train of thought because I have a GPS tracking system on it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, that was a good joke. (chuckle)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, could you tell us a joke right now. Just any joke.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay, here is a fuck- here is a funny- here is a funny mind scream. Funny rhyme scheme... not to be taken literally:<br /><br />
On your Game Boy Advance SP<br /><br />
create 'yer MII<br /><br />
den play it on WII<br /><br />
with your PSP<br /><br />
hooked to your PS3<br /><br />
cause it's fun<br /><br />
see?<br /><br />
And never ff, and never play a [[Hex Box]] 360<br /><br />
Because it's stupid and you're not a dummy (in childlike voice)<br /><br />
Mock laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That is really good.<br />
'''Fan''': Chris is that something you made up?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I made that up.<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Chris, Chris, can I write that down and tribute to quote you that? Oh man, that's good<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) So you mean to type it up and you quote me on the rhyme scheme?<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Yeah, I'd like that. I've been thinking about making a quote book like a mini Chris quote book like something you could open and have a cool line to say when you're on a party and you're like right things.<br /><br />
People talking over Chris and Alucard<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, well I'm typing it up for Alucard, so...<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Thank you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, can we hear one more?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay well here, okay um, okay here is an [[Christian's sex joke|adult joke]] I once come up with a long time ago.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': This is going to be good!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright- Alright there's this married couple, Bob and Jane, and they've been- they were looking forward to having children. So, one night, Bob comes home from work, and uh Jane says, "Hi, you had a good day, dear?" And he sa- and she sa-- he says, "Nah, it's been a long day, darling" And she said, "Well, it's okay, why don't we go upstairs, and we'll have some Breakfast." And he says, "Breakfast, at Nine p.m.?" And she says, "Sure, you bring the MILK, and I'll get an EGG."<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yo, I heard that before, man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then later, they had a boy and a girl, Junior Bacon and Orange Juice. All Part of a Balanced Breakfast.<br /><br />
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif]]<br /><br />
Perplexed silence<br />
<br />
'''Fan''': Hey, Chris, how do you solve a Mexican tank?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Stand in front of it?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': No, man, shoot the guys pushing at it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fans''': Oh that's a good one.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' I got one.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get a bunch of [[Niggos|blacks]] in a car?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Throw some chicken in.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get them out of the car?<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Job application.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What do you call a beach of black people buried up to their necks?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Afro-turf.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I came up with one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what's the difference between a black man and a pizza?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': A pizza can feed a family of four.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': How do you stop black people from jumping on a bed?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, enough racist jokes.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Put velcro on the ceiling.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enough, enough black jokes.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, uh Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Sorry<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I showed by friend that over 18 site, and he said, that he um, he um, you know he, he masturbated to it. Does that make you feel (interrupted)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's good, that's basically the reaction I would be going for. Among the male ca... among the male population, being attracted to the women.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But those are your drawings, it's like, I think he's gay now. I mean, you're a guy and you drew those.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm drawing, I'm drawing female characters.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yah, but it's drawn by you and you're, like, I don't know. It's kind of awkward for me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris, I actually need to thank you, the pictures on that site, it looked like the camera was inside Sonichu's penis when Rosechu was giving him a blowjob. That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. I've always wanted to have a camera in my penis so that I could see that if I ever got a blowjob, that would be awesome, I just wanted to say thank you very much for that perspective. It's the first time I've ever seen it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': There's a question here on the site, oh sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, well I see it... no I don't basically masturbate to my own drawings.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But you're okay if other people do, right? Even guys?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You're okay if other people, you know, masturbate to your drawings? Even if they're guys, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If the guys are masturbating to the female drawings, then yes, that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I just thought it was kind of awkward, but maybe I'm seeing it a different way.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I doubt that, uh, having a whole bunch of drawings of naked female characters can be misinterpreted as something else.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Can I to ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': One time, a friend and I were looking at porn together, and we masturbated together, but the porn was straight, ordinary porn. Is this gay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I'm sorry, where you looking at naked women?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Yes, but we were in the same room, masturbating.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, if you both were thinking about the naked women you were looking at, then I would definitely say you both are straight, cuss you're not thinking about each other, you're thinking about the women.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Right. <br /><br />
'''Fan''': Would you do that with someone?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': I'm relieved.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Man, nigger you gay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Shut up. Would you do that with someone? Like a guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Nah, I'm straight dog.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I'd, yeah I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Omnicron has a question on here, on the side here.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You see it, or?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. That's not straight.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what about the earlier question.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, the one before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, which one before? Oh, you mean...<br /><br />
(All talk at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, what do you think about-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wait, wait let him answer.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Let him answer that one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was gonna rephrase it but okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'd say it would depend on your interpretation, what is adultery to you?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But, you know, isn't the Bible only supposed to be interpreted, it's the word of God, you're not really supposed to interpret it any other way.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': It is what it is.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's in English.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh, I have no comment.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, that's what my, uh, you know I was talking about my mom saw those drawings. I mean, not the drawings, the posters, the playboy posters and that's basically what she got bad about. She said I was committing adultery.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah okay, if you don't want to talk about it, fine.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, hmmm, I think you shou, I think you should, uh, when you, I think I can see where this could be interpreted one way or another, it depends on how you look at the woman. I mean, alright, you're looking at the, uh woman, you might imagine her naked, but, I mean, you would respe- I mean, you would, you would still respect, I mean, if you were still respecting that woman, you would appreciate her more for like who she was aside or in addition to the nudity, then that's not as bad as just, as just only doing it for the appearance.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's why, uh, that's why the playboy magazines, they give you the introductions of the women. It's like letting you know who they are (unintelligible).<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh but, yeah, but there weren't any, uh, descriptions under the, yeah never mind.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Thank you for the clarification Chris.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris, do you love America?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm patriotic.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's good. I was wondering if you could sing the national anthem for us?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [[Wikipedia:My Country, 'Tis of Thee| My country tis' of thee. Sweet land of liberty. Of thee, of thee I sing.]] I don't remember the rest.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Lands where my fathers died.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Land of the pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
(Fans all start singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Stop it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey I'll, I'll tell y'all a funny joke that's kind of patriotic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, you got this, you got this funny Mexican- you got this funny Mexican guy, and he just, he just come back home to Meh-he-co after an American visit. He's like (high pitched voice) Oh the people there are so very friendly. I mean, I go to the basketball game. I sit in the back row. I sit in the back row. And then, and then, and then all of a su- and then all of the sudden right before the game started, everyone turned around, put their hands on their chests, and they say, "Oh say can you seeeeee"!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I thought you said no racist jokes?<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': Yeah man, that ain't cool!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was a name, it was a name joke.<br /><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''':...Spanish language<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm kind of offended by that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': That's racist dog. That ain't cool.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': You laugh you support terrorism.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ¿Qué?<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What'd you say?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What the hell? Who said that?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Forget it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I said, you laugh, you support terrorism.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, he's gone.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Awful Mr. T impression) I pity the fool, who try and misinterpret things, and twist them around, and then jam new words into my mouth.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You do a good Mr. T<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah you do.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) no jibber jabber.<br /><br />
(Fans laugh)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, did you watch the A-team back in the day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No but, no but, basica- but I have seen Mr. T. And then I also, I also saw when he guest, when he quest starred in an episode of Alvin and the Chipmunks.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I saw that episode, he helped uh Theodore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Theodore was getting picked on, yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, you posted a link here.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well at my [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|Methodist church]], uh, sex before marriage is okay as long as, uh, she and I, we love each other very much and truly.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But that's what they tell you, I'm talking about the word of God.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *Sigh* Okay, I'm getting tired, okay, I'm getting tired here, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, but...<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, sorry, no more of that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, you're right. Please stay Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay. Alright, I'll stay a little while longer.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, if anyone does, if anyone asks anything that makes him feel uncomfortable, I'm gonna kick you out of the room.<br /><br />
(Everyone speaks)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Chris, could you give me some advice?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I have a Japanese friend, he's, he's actually 26 and he's never had a girlfriend and we asked him some questions, just joking around one day. And we asked him if his, when he gets married, if his wife wanted to sleep with another man, would he be okay with it, and he actually said yes, as long as she wasn't being forced. Now that kind of bothered us, because us Americans, right, we think that marriage, and you know you're with somebody, they should be faithful, but he doesn't seem to think so, so I wanted to see if you had any advice maybe on what we could do to try and convince him that his viewpoint is wrong.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, hmm, it's not necessarily that the viewpoint is wrong. See, the thing is, what, to, to quote, to make it accepta- to make it like as if you're actually cheating on somebody, cheating on your spouse in the marriage, it's like not telling them, not telling him, not telling him or her about it beforehand, but it's like, you know, you, it's like you tell them beforehand and you get their approval, it's, it's okay, even if they don't want to be part of it. But not telling them, that's definitely like uh, cheating on them.<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that's another thing I would have to think about, cause, got a bit of a, couple of items of destruction that need to be repaired<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I just got, I just talked to that one friend I was talking about who, uh, saw your website, the 18 one, and it turns out he's, he's gay, he's actually gay and he fapped to, uh I mean he masturbated to, uh, Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hahaha, your friend's a fag.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': And I think he's...<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out for 15 seconds)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ...about that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I think in case you would definitely want to let him know that you are straight and you don't want that kind of relationship, and maybe, and you know<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I tell him just to get the hell away from your site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm not saying that, but like, uh, you know, you don't want that kind, you don't, I mean that's, that's basically confirmed on that note. So, uh, you want, you still wanna be friends but you don't, but you're not into that kind of thing.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I mean, he was looking at your site, like, the 18 site and he was in like, um-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Over 18.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': The over 18 site you made. The loveshack. I thought he was just like, you know, masturbating to Rosechu, but it turns out he was attracted to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *sigh* Uhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, I don't think I'll be friends with this guy anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, yeah, then tell him, yeah, to get the hell out of your house and stay away if you don't want to be friends anymore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Seems like you know too many gay friends mister.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh shut up.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris, you know how-<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's not my fault. <br /><br />
'''Another fan''': You know how cologne or perfume, you know, women wear that to try and attract men? Do you think that farts attract gay guys to each other?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Now that's stupid! Not only is that stupid, but it's gross.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Here, I'm gonna take that question and I'm gonna, I'm gonna take that question and spin that into something that's less weird. What would you say the best cologne or whatever a guy could wear to get a girl's attention?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I recommend [[Axe|Axe]] body spray.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh yeah? I think I tried that one time.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': That actually does it for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What scent do you use?<br /><br />
(All speak)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Don't you use ass body spray?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Mmm, love it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Does the Axe effect, does it really exist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Does Axe exist?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, the Axe effect. You know, they say in the commercials spray it and girls will come to you.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) and it works for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Has it worked for you Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, well, yeah, I, yeah I haven't got that working for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I think it's a scam personally.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I mean... I mean, Old Spice is pretty good. I had, I had like a couple of girls go up to me asking me for dates with Old Spice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I actually wore that Orion sent, uhh, still smelling it. So it will work Chris, you just gotta give it time.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Using the Axe.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Cameron but, isn't Axe spray for men?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': No no no no no no no, see, see I said a boyfriend, a boyfriend that I met.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, okay.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah. *laughs*<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That makes sense.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, silly, silly. I have a question for you Chris, what celebrities have you met?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Well what I'm saying is the Axe effect doesn't work. Okay, sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't actually met other celebrities in person, my real life, unless you count a local radio DJ.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I've met the DJ of my radio station 95.1 and [[Excel Saga|Monica Rial]], and meeting Monica Rial was just a treat.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ahhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was, it was good.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, she's pretty.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Maybe you should go to her and, um, maybe she could be like a contact for voice acting. I mean, you do pretty good imitations.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Do Homer Simpson!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Homer Simpson impression) Oh, look at me! I'm a stupid old person, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp, D'OH!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That was awesome<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Who else can you do Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What other imitations can you do?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, a lot. It depends on if you name it, I might recall, if you name the person or character I'll, if I can recall my memory than I will imitate that person.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Can you try Bender from Futurama?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I reckon I can do a pretty good Bender! I can twist off my arm and, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, um, since my girlfr-(clears throat)-sorry. Since my girlfriend broke up with me, I was just wondering if you could give me any tips to like, pick up y'know, another girlfriend?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) Valentine's Day is coming.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah. It's gonna be lonely without her, y'know.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah I know.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Can you help?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) No I do not know what tha- neither of them sound like in voices so I can't imitate them. (sigh) As for- as for dating advice uh, if you're- when you're going out to meet a woman, and this is like advice that's like it could've been taken from my, taken from my own advice I gave in the, the one in the video I did when I just turned 25. But it was definitely, it was given, but it was offered in this book written by a nine-year-old.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> When you're going to uh find yourself a woman, you just try to stay calm. And uh be polite, friendly. Don't uh let your nerves get the best of ya.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What should I say, what should I say here, y'know, to the girl?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Start with "hello" and "how are you".<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I ask her, should I like do a pick-up line? Do those work?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Um, sometimes. But I wouldn't, I wouldn't exactly count on it in a desperate situation. But I mean like uh, talk about yourself a little bit saying like, "Ooh did you read in the paper today about this article that really caught my eye?"<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was thinking about standing by the wall with a sign. Saying that I need a girlfriend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, don't- don't do that. That makes you look retarded.<br /><br />
(Laughter)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What about wearing a sticker that says you're single. Have you ever tried that? Do you think that would work?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what was that? A stick-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wearing like a uh, a sticker that says "I'm single".<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Wait a second I'm not done yet.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Oh I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I got that idea from your comic. I mean I thought it was a-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. I later learned that that, I already learned from my mother that made me look retarded. (Female fan laughs) To other people, so...<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Ohh. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So I stop- So I stopped- So I stopped doing that a long time ago and, I don't know (what payed attention?)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mm. Basically I'm running from others that have offered such advice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh yeah like John Tesh I remember that in your news dash.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. And also it's like uh there's an expression in my elementary somewhere uh, those who can't teach.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Um, I remember (unintelligible). Um, I was um, looking at um (something), how do you feel about Obama swearing in his book? Even read it out loud in the audiobook version.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hm. (rustling and typing in the background) Hm. Ah, yeah I heard of that, didn't care much, didn't uh give much thought into it so... Uh swearing yeah don't care much for it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': So Chris I was just wondering uh, like can you hear me?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I can hear you.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Uhh. Does wearing that medallion, does that attract females? I was thinking about making my own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) You could do what you want, to try and make yourself stand out. Um... But it depends on if you, it depends on other peoples' point of uh you I guess at this point, um... You might want to get a second opinion. I mean it's not like I can see you over da Mumble and uh say what makes you look okay and what makes you look NOT okay. Yeah, g- get a second opinion from somebody else in person.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What about you, do you think that medallion makes you look, y'know, more attractive to girls?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhmmm. Yeah. Yeah I don't know. I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah I think it looks pretty cool on you. So that's, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well you could try it, see if you could try and see if it works for ya.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Speaking, speaking of the medallion, I noticed you wear it on the outside. Have you ever done any replacing the chain on it to something a little more comfortable?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh no. It's fine. It's fine. I mean I'd say that this uh the necklace chain with the like a pair- like a pair of- like a pair of keyrings with a belt buckle on them.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm. Alright.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris in hentai, the uh guys- like the girls usually say no but the, the guy touches her a bit and she gets into it. I was just wondering if you think that really works, have you ever tried that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh. I'm sorry, could you repeat that?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': I said in hentai, y'know the Japanese um, kinda pornography-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Yeah-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': -usually, the, the girl kind of says no but then the guy starts touching her boobs or something and she gets real excited and gets into it. I was just wondering if you think that really works. Can you just make a girl excited and into you just like t hat?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhh... Yeah I don't think so. I me- I mean in most of the time I'm sure you would probably just, the girl would probably just turn around and slap you right in the face or kick you in the groin.<br /><br />
(Various pained groans)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, you were saying it's educational. I think I saw that in a porn too.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Uh. Also (unintelligible) asked "How far have you gotten with a girl"?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I've never even been on a first date in my lifetime.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ohhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> At this point.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris?<br /><br />
(Fans talk over each other)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I was suggesting uh Chris, I have family in Bristow, Virginia. I've been out there a lot. And you know, they're- I mean, people that I've seen in Virginia don't really like anime and things that much. Have you ever considered maybe trying to meet a girl in the west coast? Because a lot of people, especially universities are into anime culture. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) Yeah but I'm no- I'm not planning on traveling outside of my state. Plus I would prefer to keep it local.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah.<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
(Everyone talks over each other)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but to see the world means to have to have the money to actually go see the world.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Well You just have to save up a little bit.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah. I mean you know, trains are good.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': (strange incognizable noise)<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Gas is cheap now.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': You can meet so many people just going on a road trip or just you know, taking the bus or something I mean it's not too expensive, it's cheaper than a plane- (Chris talks over him)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Yeah, I hear you on that. But I just like, you know, if I want to go on a road trip I'd uh, I would not like to go it alone. I'd like to have my sweetheart by my side.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Mmm.<br><br />
'''Fan''': The point is you could always get a job. That's what I did once a-(cut off)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh.<br><br />
(Fans talk over each other)<br><br />
'''Other fan''': -and I wanted to meet a girl? I got this t-shirt that says "ask me about my large and attractive penis" and I wear that to the mall and it works every time.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Are you kidding, really?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yes. (cut off)<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Well that's interesting. (laughs) I have to meet you some time. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah boy. Uhh, alright, gentleman's clubs um...<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what was that noise just now?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Noise?<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I heard like a (snorts) noise.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Yeah, that was probably me be- because I was like objecting to the uh, when he was describing what it said on his t-shirt.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah that wasn't cool. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': You guys have no taste. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah-<br><br />
'''Guy''': Disgusting!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I know.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay um. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>But it just uh, just it m- just ma- I mean the way I see it, see somebody else wearing that it makes, it uh, it makes- it s- it would appear that guy is only looking for sex and women would be turned by sh- sh- sex right away at that point.<br><br />
'''Guy''': Yeah it kinda sums up (cut off)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Um, so...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um... (Chris and Fan talk over each other) Yeah let me answer this guy's question. Yeah I don't know much about gentleman's clubs so I can't really answer that question. A, and uh... <br><br />
'''Fan''': What about you though, like when you're looking for a girl, does like sex really matter? Like, to attractiveness?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, er, yeah. Eventually the se- yeah. Attractiveness does matter in one point of view but uh, but if you think about it it's like you want to get to know the person, the woman inside as well. Um, so, (I'd rather be in it?) so like uh, we were very close to each other emotionally and like friends, then the sex. Like uh, how Panda and I were very... close.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Hmm.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': What happened to Panda?<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah what happened to her?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't heard fermer- I haven't heard from her in over two weeks and then recently there were, there was the fires in Australia close to by where she was. So I don't know whether she's still alive or not. I haven't heard from her in over a coupl- over two weeks.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': That's awful.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah. I heard it was real bad, it was like a hundred and eight people died from those fires.<br><br />
'''Black fan''': Daaaamn!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but you know it's okay that at least I have uh, at least I have uh, at least I have a good woman who w- who's willing to uh be at my side at this point.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Man... Uh-<br><br />
(Multiple people talk at once)<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': -for the people who are dead?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': So you feel no remorse for the people who have died in Australia?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh no no, I DO feel remorse. Especially to Sarah sh- eh- I mean... I worry about her she's still ali- I worry about- I'm concerned if she's actually dead or still alive.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah I'm sorry to hear that.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I me- I mean, I mean I'd li- I mean I pray every day that she's still alive safe and well. And that she contact me soon.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': But you... you automatically, you basically abandoned her for Julie.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But I did not basically abandon her for Julie.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': That is what it appear- seems like.<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh)...(sigh)<br><br />
'''Fan''': She could be still alive, you never know.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Even if she isn't still alive, take solace in the fact with her perfectly barbequed remains fed to survivors.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> SHUT UP!!!<br><br />
'''Fan''': Um, that was too far, you're going too far man.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. And at this point I care about both- I care about of uh both of them equally. Both uh Sarah and Julie. But it's like, it's like you know uh, I'm uh stil- if she let's me- if she uh gets in contact with me, letting me know that she's still alive, and uhh she...<br><br />
'''Fan''': But I'm letting you know Julie, if she's still alive what are you gonna do then?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': And if people actually did eat her what would you do to them?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> OH SHUT UP!!!! Kick that guy out!<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
(laughter in background)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay um. Uh...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, but you know in all seriousness if Sarah gets in contact with me and lets me know she's gonna be coming my way in real life, and uh-<br><br />
'''Fan''': You're not gonna dump Julie are you?<br><br />
(uneasy pause)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I wouldn't dump Julie as a friend.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh but! Oh...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie I still, Julie I still love you.<br><br />
'''Late guy''': Hello everyone.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But you told me I was your sweetheart, didn't you?<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh hello, Doctor.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm. (stress sigh) Julie I'm going through a- I'm going through a transition right now so it's kind of hard for me to make uh, short watch of what I say at points and y'know answering these kind of questions.<br><br />
'''Fan''': I'm sorry uh, I don't mean to offend you or anything. Well I was just wondering-<br><br />
'''Guy''': (unintelligible) guy Chris. <br><br />
'''Other guy''': Uncalled for. <br><br />
'''Black fan''': Y'know what, don't worry about Sarah. Cause, y'know it usually takes like, like months for a person, like a victim of a fire or a flood of some crap like that, to y'know find shelter and then phone and internet and all that.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': You know, if the place is in a state of emergency, people are getting moved around all over the place, there's people in the hospital, I'm sure she's fine she just can't y'know talk to anyone.<br><br />
'''Guy''': What about Alucard's question?<br><br />
'''Fan''': Wait, yeah.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) Uh, I can't answer that question.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm?<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Why not?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because I'm still in a transition right- I'm still in a transition from Sarah to Julie at this point so uh I can't answer that question right now cause I wouldn't know how to answer it.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': It seems-<br><br />
'''Guy''': So you "transition"?<br><br />
'''Fan''': It's a hard choice, I can't blame you I mean, yeah.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I mean you know what, that's- that's a flat out bad question, I mean I would- I'd be able-<br><br />
'''Other guy''': It's quite valid.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (aggravated) Auuuughh! Okay now I'm gettin' uh, okay now my head's out of order.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Oh.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': I've had that problem too.<br><br />
'''Guy''': It's never fun.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay forget it then.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Uh okay I got, I got one. Impressions, impressions! Uh, can you do one of Bill Clinton?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... no.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Um, Chris? Do you-<br><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh)<br><br />
'''Other guy''': I was wondering do you watch the Boondocks on Adult Swim?<br><br />
'''Black fan''': Aw yeah that's my show!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I've watched the Boondocks.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Did you enjoy it?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's alright.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Can you do any imitations of the characters there, like Uncle Ruckus?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent gibberish) -dem niggers over there! Sing along if you know the words to that song I just made up.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': What was that?<br><br />
'''Guy''': That was, wait, what?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That was Uncle Ruckus. Well I'll tell ya what I sell propane and propane accessories all day long! (begins a high-pitched cackling and squeals more gibberish)... That was-<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Could you do Meowth from Pokemon?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Meowth!<br><br />
'''Fan''': The talking Meowth.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Meowth! ... (cackles again) Aye Jessie, James, we gotta go snag that Pikachu again!<br><br />
'''British guy''': Do you know how to do the Team Rocket song?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, the Team Rocket song er, do you mean the motto?<br><br />
'''British guy''': Myes the motto, the classic one.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Hmmmm... Prepare for trouble make it double, to protect the world from devastation, to uni- to unite all people- o- (sigh)...<br><br />
'''Guy''': ...in our nation!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mm. Anyway... (sigh) Hang on I'm a little mixed up here. Prepare for trouble make it double, to protect the world from devastation, to unite all people within our nation, to debi- to debide(sic) the evils of truth and love, to extend our reach to the stars above. Team Rocket blast off to the speed of light, surrender now or prepare to fight.<br><br />
'''Guy''': ... Meowth, that's right.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': That's right!<br><br />
(chuckling)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Now hand over the Pikachu!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. (sigh)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Oh come on-<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': -than Sonichu, because Sonichu is obviously more powerful than Pikachu!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I will not hand over the Sonichu, so there. (pause) Alucard, stop asking the questions please?<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': Yes Alucard you are very annoying.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah someone kick him out.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br><br />
'''Guy''': Good goin' Canine.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
'''Canine''': Anytime. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm. Actually I'm k- actually I'm kind of tired now uh... I'm gonna- I'm gonna head on down now but y'know I'll come back another night.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Okay.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': Well thanks for coming Chris, we really appreciate it.<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: No. I've got a few questions for you Chris, I've been waiting.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Clyde no, no, no.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': How did he get in here?<br><br />
(Everyone yells over each other)<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: It's important!<br><br />
'''Guy''': Ohh he leeeft!<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: No, no, shut up, shut up-<br><br />
'''Other guy''': He's not coming back, give up.<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: Tell him it's important it's about Panda!<br><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm digesting her right now.<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: That will get him back in, I know it.<br><br />
'''Guy''': What's the important news?<br><br />
<br />
[End recording]<br />
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{{Transcription}}<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 6|Mumble Chat 6]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 8|Mumble Chat 8]]|}}<br />
<br />
==Links==<br />
* [https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBWklfakp0TGdDSkU Download]<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
<br />
[[Christian's sex joke]] - Used during this chat.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_7&diff=163098Mumble 72012-09-29T16:38:37Z<p>Irisviel: </p>
<hr />
<div>'''Mumble 7''' is the seventh of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]], held on 13 [[February 2009]].<br />
<br />
Appears to be the genesis for the "Power" videos in which Chris attempts and fails to prove his [[I AM STRONG|strength]] and [[CWC Fighter|fighting]] [[Challenge For Clyde|skill]], though these would not materialize for several months.<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
* A fan talks to Chris about putting naked posters of girls and pictures of men up in his room up to find out if his friend was a [[homo]] as Chris suggested. He tells Chris that his girlfriend dumped him over the posters and his friend ignored all of them. Chris sees nothing wrong with his advice until Julie tells him that she wouldn't like that. Chris recommends sending an anonymous letter explaining the situation and utterly fails to apologize or show concern.<br />
* Fans point out that Chris shouldn't have to show and prove that he is straight.<br />
* Chris cuts a fan off to let Julie ask a question involving [[pedofork|shota]].<br />
* Fans ask Chris to turn his radio down.<br />
* Chris uses Wal-Mart printer paper & RSVP ballpoint pen to draw, and a 50-pack of Crayola markers to color. Refuses to use color pencils or Photoshop to color, saying he prefers the markers.<br />
* Chris talks about Omicron's redone version of [[Sonichu]], accusing him of plagiarism. Says that the difference between what Omicron is doing and what he is doing is that Sonichu is his. Agrees to let Omicron continue if he credits Chris with the copyright.<br />
* '''Julie is convincing Chris to make videos proving to Clyde how strong he is.''' Chris feels that the [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|dildo breaking video]] proved this. Fans say that Chris's dildo comes apart naturally for cleaning.<br />
* '''A fan recommends making a video showing off his fighting moves to scare Clyde.'''<br />
* Chris is asked why he would use a dildo in proving that he is straight. Chris says that he is straight for crushing it, fans call him a [[homo]] for keeping it.<br />
* Chris [[lie|denies]] [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|using the dildo]], and claims that it's now broken. Fan says it could easily be reassembled. Chris is adamant that it was glued and that it took a lot of strength to pull it apart.<br />
* When asked by Julie, '''Chris admits using super-shears from Cutco to break the dildo glue, claiming to use a lot of strength in the process'''.<br />
* Fans discuss [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]]. Chris insists that it was drawn in protest of [[ED]]. He says it was anonymous, as most women have long brown hair and her eyes were censored.<br />
* Insists that [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:AngelicainGod%27sEyes.JPG the Rule 34 of Angelica Rosechu] is masturbating and enjoying it, and is using her hand to do it.<br />
* Chris thinks Billy Mays is on Home Improvement.<br />
* Chris isn't doing anything on Valentine's Day, as Julie is not there yet.<br />
* Chris discusses the the No-Redheads policy in his [[Love Quest]]. Says that redheads don't attract him unless they are not natural redheads. No piercings or tattoos allowed.<br />
* Chris is OK with blue hair.<br />
* Does a terrible Marge Simpson impersonation.<br />
* Chris impersonates Comic Book Guy and Donald Duck.<br />
* A fan presents the possibility that AIDS was sent by God to kill the [[homos]].<br />
* [[Chris and Religion|Premarital sex being forbidden in Christianity]] is discussed. Chris fumbles for an explanation.<br />
* '''A fan pretending to be black says he believes the government made AIDS to get rid of black people. Chris says that that's the kind of thing a black guy would say'''.<br />
* Premarital sex comes up again. Chris compares it to using porn to practice and learn skills for later.<br />
* The fake black fan calls Chris on his comment from earlier about black guys and AIDS. He makes the excuse that someone else said it first.<br />
* Questions on Sonichu start. Sonichu doesn't wear clothes because it's a comic. Chris isn't sure how [[Blake]] sounds. He might sound black, he might sound like Shadow the Hedgehog. The fake black fan asks why the bad guy has to be black, also mentioning [[Silvana]]. Chris says that he doesn't have to be.<br />
* Chris gets annoyed about the pronunciation of [[Rosechu]] as popularized by the Old Narrator of the [[Audiobooks]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't disagree that the Audiobooks made Sonichu more popular that he ever did'''.<br />
* He doesn't mind fanfics that don't portray Sonichu in a bad light.<br />
* The audio goes low in the main chat and a fan has a private, unrelated conversation for a few minutes.<br />
* Audio comes back as Chris is admitting that the [[B-Manajerk]] was black in real life.<br />
* Chris doesn't watch the news, so doesn't have an opinion on [[Barack Obama|Obama]]. He voted for him because he saw a documentary where he saw more of himself in Obama, namely that he was an outcast at one point.<br />
* A fan says that you should vote based on politics, not personality. Chris says that he is a moderate.<br />
* Chris doesn't know what the financial bailout is. He says that he drew the [[Sonichu 8#The Elevator Gags|racist picture]] of Obama based on his father's joke, before he saw the documentaries that made him vote.<br />
* Chris will not agree or disagree with interracial dating/marriage. He would want a white woman, but he would be [[gal pals|friends]] with others.<br />
* He'd marry an Asian.<br />
* It's not yet known if Silvana will be a good guy or if she will lose her [[pickle|dick]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't know what he wanted to be when he was younger, he's just making it up as he goes along'''.<br />
* '''Chris is keeping the name changes in the comics for legal reasons'''.<br />
* A fan suggests Slaweel cursing Rosechu to have a dick. Chris gets upset before saying that he'll think about it. The fans think it's a great idea. One considers a talking penis for Rosechu. Chris says it's a stupid idea.<br />
* Another fan asks about Chris being sacked from Wendy's. He denies scaring the child with his Donald Duck impersonation, saying that he didn't make him cry.<br />
* Chris might release his DVD one day.<br />
* A fan says that Chris has influenced underground rappers such as Immortal Technique, who has sampled him.<br />
* Chris takes requests. Impersonates MC Hammer, Dr Nick Riviera, Peter from [[Family Guy]], Mario and Sonic, butchering them all and tainting our childhood memories.<br />
* More Sonichu questions. '''Chris won't upload [[Zapina]] [[Rule 34]] because she is underage and Chris is worried about legal ramifications'''. When he is reassured that this would be legal, he says he would consider it. He will also consider Sonichu-Rosechu anal sex. Rosechu would not clean the [[pickle]] with her mouth, she would clean it off with a washcloth. He would not sell the the washcloth on EBay.<br />
* Chris calls a stop to the potty humor displayed throughout the Sonichu questions.<br />
* '''Chris denies that [[Yawning Squirtle]] is a character'''.<br />
* Fans ask for a joke. He recites a dreadful rhyme about Videogame consoles. He then tells his awful [[Christian's sex joke|sex joke]]. Fans start to tell racist jokes about [[niggos|black people]] and Mexicans. Chris calls for a stop to this.<br />
* A fan says that his friend [[mass debating|masturbated]] to the [[rule 34|adult section of Sonichu]] and is now worried that his friend is a [[homo]], as they were drawn by a man. '''Chris says that this is what he intended it for''', and they are drawings of women, so his friend is straight. He doesn't masturbate to his own drawings.<br />
* Chris reassures a fan that [[Mass Debating|masturbating]] in the same room as another man isn't gay as long as both men are thinking of women, but he would not do this.<br />
* Chris offers no comment as to what constitutes adultery.<br />
* Chris says that he is patriotic. Asked to sing the national anthem, he instead mangles a few lines of "My Country, 'Tis of Thee". He then tells a 'patriotic' joke that is insensitive to Mexicans. [[Chris and Hypocrisy|The fans call him on his "no more racist jokes" statement from earlier]].<br />
* Chris does a poor impersonation of Mr T.<br />
* Chris says that if you are married, sleeping with someone else isn't cheating if you have consent from your spouse.<br />
* Chris gives more advice on homos and recommends Axe body spray for attracting girls.<br />
* Chris has not met any celebrities, only local DJs.<br />
* Does impersonations of Homer Simpson and Bender. The two sound identical.<br />
* Chris gives dating advice: Stay calm, polite, friendly and don't let your nerves get the best of you. Say "Hello, how are you" and talk about yourself. '''[[Barbara|His mom]] told him that standing around with a sign makes him look retarded. A female fan cracks up laughing and can't stop'''.<br />
* "Those who can't, teach"<br />
* Chris says he has never even been on a date. Rejects dating suggestions from fans.<br />
* '''Chris was close with Sarah "[[PandaHalo]]" McKenzie, but hasn't heard from her in over two weeks. He heard about the fires and doesn't know if she's still alive. When a fan adds that 108 people were killed in the fires, Chris responds to the entire ordeal with [[Chris and death|"It's OK though, at least I have a good woman who's willing to be by my side at this point"]]'''.<br />
* When pushed, he says he feels remorse for the the victims of the fires and is concerned that [[Sarah Cassandra McKenzie|Panda]] is dead.<br />
* He asserts that he didn't abandon Sarah for [[Julie]].<br />
* '''A fan says that if [[PandaHalo|Sarah]] isn't alive, Chris should take solace that her perfectly barbecued remains fed the survivors. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|SHUT UP!!!]]'''<br />
* Chris says that he cares about Sarah and Julie equally and wouldn't dump Julie as a friend. A fan asks what he will do to the survivors who ate Sarah. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|"SHUT UP!!!"]] and demands that he be booted.<br />
* Fans reassure Chris that Sarah is probably OK.<br />
* Chris does abominable impersonations of Uncle Ruckus from The Boondocks and Hank Hill. '''He sings "Don't Trust Them New [[Niggos|Niggas]] Over There"'''. He also impersonates Meowth and sings the Team Rocket song.<br />
* [[Clyde]] enters. Chris refuses to answer questions and leaves.<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
===Chris proves he is straight===<br />
'''Guy:''' Chris!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all! ''[echoes]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'll be damned.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh, Chris-[gets cut off by another guy]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh you know, can't com- it's uh, can't complain.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' How's construction of the site?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' [unintelligible] so Chris<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I...I need to ask you something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yup?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh... I put those posters, of the... Playboy and everything in my room, and uh, one of my girlfriends saw it, and she got mad at me for looking at other w-... other girls, and she broke up with me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh... I'm sorry to hear that. It could-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, she's calling me a pervert. I-I don't understand this.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Did you... did you ex- did you try to explain to her about situation between you and that guy?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I... I did, and I don't think she understood.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... well, you should try, you should, uh, s-... try, uh, you should try wr-, you should tr-, uh, do you know her email address?<br /><br />
[pause]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So, uh Chris-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' A-also, wait... also, uh, the friend, I was talking about, he, uh, visited, and [typing noises] he, uh, he went into my room, and didn't even notice the posters. He just s-sat in the middle, he didn't s...sit in any uh, part of the room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Huh. Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, uh... so, yeah, I don't know. I mean, my girlfriend broke up with me, called me a pervert, said that I shouldn't be looking at other girls, I mean... I don't know what to do now.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well listen, uh, answer my question, do you have her email address?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Umm... yeah, but she won't... she won't answer me anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm... ok, hmm. Here's what you can do, uh... Do you know your girlfriend's... any of your girlfriend's [[Gal pal|gal-pals]]?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm... well, you should try to... like wr- you should write out... hmm... hmm... here's an idea. S- Write a letter to her and send it via smail mai-, via snail mail, but don't write the return address. On it.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What should I write?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just like, you know, like, they, you know, this is... you know, this is... you, uh, you put your name there, and you, it's, and then you would basically explain the situation between you and that guy, and that's why you had the posters up, well that's why you put the posters up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't really understand what was the point of the posters in the first place?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[sigh]'' it's... ''[sigh]'' if he looks at... if he, if he is very interested, if he is, if he was straight, he would uh, look at the women. Very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But he didn't even notice them. He didn't notice any of the posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, then I guess he is a [[Homos|homo]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' W...well, um, he wasn't looking at anything, not even the guy posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Hmm... He's not blind, surely.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, like, what is he, is he like, uh...I don't know.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I don't know either, man. But, you know at the moment I would suggest you, uh, write the- write the letter to your girlfriend, send the mail, don't write your return address on the envelope, and, uh, mail it to her.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Also my mom saw the posters and she got offended, she's like really religious and st- she said that like, uh, you know, lust is a sin or some shit. Oh, like she said, she's like all against the, the uhh, the like, Playboy in my room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, your- apparently your mom hasn't been [beeps] that open minded that time. So, you know, give her time to reh-cover, she'll uh, she might op- she might open up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I don't think that was a good idea though, I mean, w-why did-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -you suggest it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I was trying to see if he, to, I was trying to s-help you figure out if your uh, if your friend was a homo or not.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I know, but, do you have uh, [Fans talking] Playboy posters in your room?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unclear] I'm very forward.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I have uh, poster of some, of uh, I have a poster in my room of uh, some uh, naked girls I got from adamandeve.com as a bonus.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Then, nobody says anything about it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[clears throat]'' Well, I didn't really have too many oppor- too many people in my room. So, it's kind of like in a hard to notice place.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Um, wondering, um, If you showed anyone, wouldn't they be offended?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe, maybe not, [Fan grunts] it just depends on their point of view.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I wouldn't want the same thing that happened to me to happen to you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I hear you there. Uh, just to so just sound clear... Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie, are you there?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ok, uh, would you be offended if you saw such a poster in my room?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''[breaks up]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, What will, what was that? [Echoes]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie'''</span> Yes I would, kind of.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well that's no problem, I can take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, see that's what I'm talking about, I mean...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, that's why I asked Julie right now, because I respect her. So, because she said that she would, I will take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I've been thinking, um...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you have... [unclear] Chris, I don't think you should look at other woman.[sic] In my opinion.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I see, Julie. Well that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I...I respect that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' She might get jealous, I mean, that's what happened to my...my girlfriend.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, that's fine Julie, I respect your, I respect that. Just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey, can I ask you a question? If uh, he's done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, uh, one more thing, um, you know I've been thinking, uh, I don't really think you need, you know, posters and stuff like,<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' to prove you're straight, I mean, if you're straight, that's all there is to it i-if, am I right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think you're right.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I...I mean, you shouldn't have to prove that you're straight.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> You're right.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I m-mean [line breaks temporarily] Y-you shouldn't have to reassure yours-self. You should just be knowing it, and nothing anybody says, should get very, uh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, it's ve-ah-very-but you see, I have like, I have that [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] in my room, it's just, so that like, you know, for in case I have any-for in case I have any random thoughts, on account really, to tempt me.<br /><br />
''[unintelligible mix of chatter from most participants trying to get their word in]''<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I mean, even if they're random thoughts, even if they're random thoughts, if you know you're ''positive'' about it, you shouldn't have to look at anything to make sure.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, usually.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay. Uh, moving on from all this homosexuality, uh, I have one question, uh- [gets cut off by Chris in the background] ...never mind, [fat douchebag?]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey, ah, let Julie ask a question, let Julie ask her question.<br /><br />
<br />
===7:08 Julie asks about shotacon===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, I was watching you on the Internet yesterday and, what's a shotacon?[slightly cut off]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...I'm sorry, uh-y, I'm sorry, you got cut off, what was that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> What's a sho-[cuts off again]-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...What's a...''short''?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Shot-[cuts off third time, pretty obvious she's saying ''shota'']-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dude, shota.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, shota.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ssshhhh...shota?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, S-H-O-A-T-A [sic].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, it's a word he found online.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, [baby?], yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never heard of that word.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I dunno, if you want to look it up, you can probably find out on an online dictionary...<br /><br />
''[pause, and a weary sigh from someone other than Chris]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'll-I'll take a look. Hang on.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I know some Japanese and I think I've heard that somewhere, like in a magazine or something.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, it's some of that Japanese shit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Probably is. Three moments, I'll look it up.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Okay!<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's radio is audible]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Whoops, that was the wrong one. The wrong bookmark.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' S-H-O-T-A.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I know, I just get the wrong bookmark for...place I wi-for like...dictionary-type website that I have.<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's keyboard taps are audible]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uhhh...Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, now that Julie's done with her question, I also had one.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' He has to find what that means first.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, ''I'm sorry''.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Shit, ah shit, I've just found it on Wikipedia. It's, uh, it's a ma-it's a Japanese name. It's a name of a person. In Japan.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Really.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a Japanese name. I think it's-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh no no, I think you're looking at the wrong thing, it's S- S-H-O-T-A-C-O-N.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> S-H- I mean- O-T-A-C-O-N? Shotacon?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's the same thing, just put C-O-N at the end.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I've read it in a dictionary before, can't remember what it means...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, oh! Okay, here it is, uh..."shotacon, sometimes shortened to shota, is Japanese slang of the phrase 'Shotaro Complex'"...uh..."that describes the attraction to young boys or an individual with such an attraction".<br /><br />
''[Disgusted reactions heard]''<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh my god, what the fuck?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' There's lots of sick people. Y'all are gonna get ricked?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Someone from 4 cent garbage came in and told us to look that up, I didn't-I didn't even want to.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess he's a homo...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Don't worry I banned him already.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Um, Chris, Vivian wants to know if you can like, turn your radio down a bit, it's distracting.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yes, please turn it down.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I thought that was quiet enough, here.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, no, the lady'll probably pick it up<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Alright cool. Merci.<br /><br />
<br />
===10:21 Another fan asks about art supplies===<br />
<br />
'''Another Fan:''' Okay, um, I have a question, um, I like to draw—interrupted by mumbling—I like to draw comics and such, I mean I want to start up a webcomic. What kind of materials do you use?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, like, you mean for drawing?<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well mostly I just use like, uh, paper without lines, like, computer printer paper you can get in, like, Wal-Mart, for an inexpensive price in multiples.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then I use like an RES—RSVP-brand pen with the black ink.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh okay, is it like, um, a gel pen or a ballpoint pen or-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like a ballpoint, it's like a ballpoint pen.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What do you use to color?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I use Crayola brand markers.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would like to—I would—I would—I would recommend getting the Super Tip 50-pack which you can also find at the Wal-Mart.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay. I-[interrupted by someone else on chat]<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's basically-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' At Wal-Mart I usually get the 24-color RoseArts. Those are—those do pretty good too.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhh, Vivian, just so you—just so you know, I'm using the microphone that came with Hey You, Pikachu for Nintendo Sisty-Four [sic].<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, yeah no, no offense, but uh, personally I prefer like, colored pencils and shit cause-[Chris mumbling is heard]-they're like easier to erase. Photoshop [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If you want to use colored pencils that's fine, I'm not, uh, saying that you have to use Crayola markers-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why don't you use colored pencils? They're really good, you should try one on like, at least one page, just try one. One page with just colored pencils.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But um, actually, you can—you can scan your drawings and then color—color them in like, Photoshop or something. [rest of chat murmurs in agreement] That looks really professional, and really good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I prefer using the markers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's just that I-I mean—I mean I've tried—I mean I've colored with colored pencils before, and I just feel best with using markers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I have a question, um, uh, the Hey You Pikachu microphone, how does that work on the, you're using that on your computer? Did you say?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah it's just, yeah, it's like you plug it into uh, into the basic microphone jack.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh, yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Excuse me, I have a nice little Plantronics headset.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Hey Chris can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah, hang on a second, uh... uh, Omicron, that's uh, you're basically, uh, you're basically plagiarizing here. You're even using, uh, parts of my original drawings to, uh, make up your so called real ones and, you're just—you're just parroting—you're just plagiarizing-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's dirty and illegal.<br /><br />
[Unintelligible mumbling]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, you said so yourself, you're being illegal. And plus, and plus I'm-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, isn't combining Sonic with Pikachu the same thing?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, but, but but also, look at this, also I'm looking at this site here, it said, he's claiming the copyright for himself, but he's, but he's not. I mean that's like, but he's, he—he says<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' You need to ban him immediately.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, ban him immediately.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh wait wait wait wait wait...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah maybe you should check-[interrupted by loud noise, probably Chris]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well he said that, he's saying that all of Sonichu material is copyrighted by him, when it's clearly not.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah but you use Sonic and Pikachu, and you copyrighted it-<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' He just offered to give you credit-[interrupted by noisy chatter]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean, I put, I mean, yeah but, I mean, I'm talking about the—the Omnicron [sic] guy here, that's like, just put this link here.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh he offered to give you credit-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes that's the same thing you did.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well no no, he, no-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We decided-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No he's plagiarizing MY Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We just decided [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris it's, it's a parody, kinda like Sonichu is.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but he—yeah, but he's saying, he said—he—on his front page he says, all Sonichu material-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah but he's, he just offered to change it, so are you okay with that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> By changing it to Sonichu X-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, he said he'll give you credit instead of claiming it for himself.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, uh, yeah I would appreciate that, that would be better, yeah, if... he changed that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Alright cool.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Problem solved.<br /><br />
<br />
===15:02 Chris talks about dildos to prove his strength===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes Julie.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you think you could tell everyone about my idea? And, since you're going to do it do you think you could tell everyone so they could look out for it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, your idea... um, oh oh oh, yeah, just basically a video of me standing up to Clyde and showing him how strong I am, doin' a few kicks for the camera or something-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, you should throw some punches, show him what you're made of, you know?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Kick, punch, it's all in the mind ''etc.''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I basically... I pretty much did that when I...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Let him talk, c'mon!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I pretty much did - already proved my strength when I... ripped that... ''dildo'' in half.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Foreign-Sounding Guy:''' Most dildos come apart for cleaning.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' C'mon.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but that thing was screwed together at the seam.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok listen to me...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris...<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' Eh Chris!<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ...could you do a like further test of your strength for me?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''stress sigh'' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I wanna see how strong you are please.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...That's fine, I can do that.<br /><br />
'''Other Fan:''' I mean that's ok, you showed your strength, but you should show her your moves. Like show her, like, what kind of moves you can do.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, let me tell you a story about how this'll work, ok.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' See, my, uh, one of my cousins, uh, this guy at school, kept, y'know, picking on him, calling him gay and stuff, and trying to fight with him, and my cousin told him to sss- y'know, one day, the guy said "Hey man, I'm gonna beat you up" and my cousin said "Look, if I show you some of my moves, I'll prove to you I can kick your ass in a fight" and so my cousin, y'know, he stepped back and, he took, uh, he took Tae Kwon Do, and he did a couple moves, y'know? He just stood there for like five minutes just doing his moves, and, y'know, some punches and kicks and... The guy just backed right off; he didn't even want to talk to him any more. So I think that should work.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> All right, well I'll try that. I'll try that.<br/><br />
'''Guy:''' All right. Sounds good.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br?><br />
'''Fan:''' You try- you always mention about how you're straight but yet in your video about you crushing a dildo, uh, doesn't that kinda like, y'know, not help your cause?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, it proves I'm straight because...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' But you have a dildo.<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I got it free with an order on adameve.com<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' But you ''kept'' it and shit. That ain't cool.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' What I don't... Why were there batteries in...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh yeah Chris, why ''were'' there batteries in it? Why did you keep it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I mean...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it wasn't an easy thing for me to sell, right off the bat, or even to make a profit, so...<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In fact in a way it's a good thing I kept it, cause it allowed me to be able to break it, like I did.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes but why would you keep it?<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why would you keep it?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I woulda saved it for my sweetheart, if she'd wanted it. To use it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Aaaahhh.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But if I were there wouldn't you prefer the real deal?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Some things that metal just can't replace.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Yeah.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I heard that.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' You didn't use it did you?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No I did not.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Did you just throw all the ones you had away?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I only had that one. And there you go, I ri- there you go, I broke it apart.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you just, like, ''take'' it apart, I mean, it did...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' ...seem to come apart, like, screwed on...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I did not take it apart, that thing was glued at the seam. I had to put a lot of strength into breaking it at the middle there.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, but I think, um, showing your moves would be better.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Right.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Clyde would mess with you if you show him you can kick his ass.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey, Chris's a muthafuckin' ''gangsta''!<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Blap blap.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yes, Chris will fuck Clyde's shit up.<br /><br />
(awkward pause)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait, Chris, didn't you say you used a - didn't you say you used scissors to break the dildo?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I pretty much did have to so I could break that ''glued seam''.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, I thought you broke it with your hands.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well I- yeah well I would have but it was dang glued at the seam, so I clipped straight in with the scissors I had.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a pair of Super Shears from [[Cutco]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(feigning interest)'' Huh.<br /><br />
<br />
===19:50 Chris defends his Rule 34===<br />
<br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, let's talk about something else. Uh, Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whenever the announcement of the adult Sonichu page, when I looked at your gallery, very nice stuff, you know, I see a picture of what looks like you with a Sonichu, uh, medallion. Like, and, who's that one girl, exactly?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Who, [[Megan]]?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I thought it was, like, [[Crystal]], cause of the hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, it was - it was originally drawn to be Megan but I censored her eyes to, uh, port- to protect her identity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Mmmmmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''(laughing)'' That's stupid! (?) That's so silly.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I drew that after I found the ED page in November.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you say that?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In protest against it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thought you were going to get rid of it anyway.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I tore up the original drawing, I, in- into squares, and I put in in an envelope.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you upload it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you do that shit? Like, and...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I understand Rosechu, but, like y'know, why, like, something that's from real life. That's the problem (?)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's not necessarily from real life, it depends on you inter- it depends on your interpretation, I mean it's hardly- I mean, '''most women have long brown hair, and the eyes are censored''', so...<br/><br />
(laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''Most'' women?!?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I remember in that one video you were saying it was Megan.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because it broke, because it end up, because it the end it broke up my friend - broke up my friendship eve, my uh, friendship with Megan.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um, can I ask you a question? In the third picture, with [[Angelica Rosechu]], what is... what's happening, is... God... doing...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nope. She's masturbating. And she's enjoying it.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But she has no hands there. How's she doing it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' She's ''enjoying'' it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But she does... She does...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah but how's she doing it? She doesn't have her hands there.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> She does have her hands, she's... ''(stress sigh)'' She's... like most women would be able to do the same thing.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thing it's the angle, Julie. I think it's the angle you were looking at it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah plus uh, the picture wasn't, uh, very - wasn't as clear as, like, you know, I would have liked to have had it, uh, I mean, I had that file for a while, and it...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah some of those are kinda blurry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, some deg- some degraded.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ? a good question, have you drawn anything... of... have you drawn anything like that with me? Cause I would actually like to see, if you did. If so, could you, and let me see? I, uh, sorry, that's very rude to ask.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm sorry, let me answer this guy. Yeah, well, I made a retraction video later saying that I- I disowned that address.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ah, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just after that guy hacked into it and changed to it to suck. And as such.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hang on, I'm gonna take a look at that... My Youtube...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I like this song.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What song?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' The song that's playing in the background of, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what do you think of, uh, what do you think of that guy who advertises products, Billy Mays? What do you think of him?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... Billy... Oh! Yeah he's an ok guy, I watched him on Home Improvement.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Billy Mays?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, that was another guy on Home Improvement, Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No that was the same guy. That was the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Really?!? Let's look up. IMDB, go. ''(sound of typing)''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Believe me, it's the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, I really enjoyed your, um, adult, uh, section of the site.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... okey dokey, very good. Aaahh, trying to figure out how to update the link on this thing here. Oh, maybe under here. Oh there it is, thank God (?), update right now.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(singing)'' You spin me right round baby, right round...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (joining in) Like a record baby, right round round round<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's a classic, I can't help in man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There you are, updated. It's finally fixed.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Actually that was Richard Karn on Home Improvement, not Billy Mays.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well my mistake, I mean the guy had the beard and uhh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh yeah I can understand.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And the voice sounds- and the voice sounds the same...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah. They sound the same.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There's a matter of interpretation apparently I misinterpreted so I will admit that I was wrong.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah see we all make mistakes, don't be too hard on yourself.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unintelligible babble or singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you gotten any fan art submissions or notable? For the uh- webpage?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I got one today... It's like mostly a drawing of that uh that uh- of the fan herself.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -got in the snail mail today.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -Sunday.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hmmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What are you doing for this Valentine's day Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhm... I'm sorry, what was that question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What will you be doing this year on Valentine's day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm depends...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ahhh, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm.<br /><br />
Fan: Surely a man of such magnitude as yourself are going to be doing something important, aren't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Magnitude? Way to choose the words buddy.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Vocabulary talent.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, cause I don't have Julie over here yet.<br /><br />
(Reactions of OHs and AHs)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If she was here...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible) -play games.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Or we could just uh... talk.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Ehehehehe. Maybe... uh... why no redheads?<br /><br />
'''Other Woman:''' Yeah?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I was trying to think about that when the other guy asked that question. Uh... I was trying to think up that unh... mmmm... Uhhhh, redheads just don't be very- tract me so much.<br /><br />
Several: Uh, ah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's- it's- a- pi- a possibility that they're dyed.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmmmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But yeah y'know natural redheads enh, yeah, just don't really turn me on as much.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I see...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you thought about girls with um, highlights?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... (pause) aaahhhh... what turns me on hhh- (inhales) (pause) obviously the women.<br /><br />
'''Man:''' Gotta have the women. (?)<br /><br />
'''Guy''': What about piercings or tattoo?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, neither of those.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhhh-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris! How bout like non-orange hair, not like... no, never mind. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... oh... okay... hmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait Chris! How do you feel about blue hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Blue hair's okay, otherwise I wouldna- Otherwise I wouldn't've liked Sailor Mercury.<br /><br />
'''British? guy:''' That is true, she does have blue hair.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' She's a very fine character. There is no way to deny it.<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Blue hair is OFF DA HOOK!!!<br/><br />
<br />
===28:35 Chris impersonates various cartoon characters===<br />
<br />
'''British??? guy:''' Doesn't Marge Simpson have blue hair as well?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (in some kind of insane voice) Oh yeah! Marge Simpson has blue hair and it's as tall as the Empire State building!!!<br /><br />
(Some HMMs UHs and UMs follow)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yo Chris!! Can you do some impersonations for us?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Oh we'd love to hear that!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just did Marge Simpson.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah you're really talented.<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(Several people talking at once)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> -they're really good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Do another SimpsonsChris, how about Comic Book Guy?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Mmmmhmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I'm very indeed. Oh aren't we all promiscuous and whatnot. I like Batman and Robin, oh look! Stan Marsh has come into the thing again - I forget that guy's name, that guy who did the Marvel comics.<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Stan Lee. (Pause) Chris do your Donald Duck impression.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Everybody have fun (incoherent and scary quacking)<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris you should work for Disney.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's good Chris.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Have you ever considered being a voice actor?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Errrrrp... possibly, I'm not sure.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (incoherent, cut off by Chris)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent... another cartoon voice)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris, you're a Christian, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I was just wondering-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahm actu-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -do you just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm actually a Methodist church.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome, I was just wondering: Do you think AIDS was sent by god to kill the homos or do you think that it's just an accident or something man-made?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thou- the thought never occurred to me... thought never occurred to me.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' can you do an impression of Arnold Schwarzenegger?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hold- the question...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Let Chris answer the question.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thought- the thought never occurred to me about what you just said about the AIDS there mmmm... but y'know, it's a possibility and I will not agree nor disagree with it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I was just wondering I mean, I've had that discussion with some of my Christian friends. I just wanted to get your opinion, thank you.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmhhh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think (clears throat) I think Omicron has a point and you did tell me you went to a methodist church didn't you? So that's-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well th- well my Methodist church is uh more loose on- is not as strict on uh- on uh sex.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris I don't know- I don't know that much about religion in the States but I don't think there is a looser Meth- Methodist church. God makes the rules Omicron says.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, hmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well, you know personally I think that the government made AIDS to kill off all the brothers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whoa, whoa... That's what the blacks always say.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. (pause) I'm going to agree, that sounds like something that uh... well, a black guy would say.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So your church is kinda of uh- they let you do- their kinda loose on the whole moral restrictions?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... (pause) uhhh... that's... what's the question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Your church they- you said they're kind of more uh- y'know they're less strict on the whole moral thing, like, as far as sexuality goes? Right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -ah basically.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But y'know, uhh, I thought you're supposed to listen to the Bible or whatever not, y'know, not necessarily- no, never mind.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (interrupts)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, there's also a uh, there's also a- think about this uh, if you uh- if you- if you were a think uh- you have to find for yourself a good meaning behind uh- good meaning behind watching pornography to uh- like teach how it- how to do this and that when you actually get around to doing it...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's all ???<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's all's considered education for yourself.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' How is that realistic at all?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, it's uh- not a really good thing to learn from, trust me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It can be done before marriage as well as long as me and my sweetheart really love each other very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But not in Christianity.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But all I'm saying is y'know, porn is completely, completely unre- unrealistic I mean you can't really learn anything from it.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It gives- it gives you enough ideas.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unclear)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (incoherent) porn.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' When you actually have sex, it's nothing like porn.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe not like you, you not gonna do it-<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' You can't do it immediately- immediately anal sex cause most women are not very happy with anal sex and also...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay, shut up<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' -and also weird-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Shut up.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Yes.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And... that wasn't cool, like...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That was uncalled for...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, like, suthin' a BLACK MAN would say...<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' That's racist man...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, somebody said it on here first before I did.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Does that make it ok?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, I think he's trying to make it clear that- I dunno.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I typically agree with that guy.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So nothing g- it doesn't make it ok.<br /><br />
(incoherent)<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling) I wi- I'm sorry, I take it back.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(unclear)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Guys can we get back to Sonichu, Please?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah this is getting ridiculous.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unclear) -Sonichu actually.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Anyway, my question is that: why does Sonichu not wear clothes while Rosechu and the other Rosechus do wear clothes? And underwear?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Aaaaaaaaaamp... It's like uh- it's basically a cartoon and it doesn't really matter, it's like... mm... think about this: Most cartoon characters wear at least one article of clothing. At least one article. And uh- it's like Yogi Bear who just wears a necktie and a hat.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 35.14)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Other Guy:''' I think it would be cool if all the Sonichus and Rosechus got together and they and- they all formed a big team and they had special uniforms or something, kinda like the X-men.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Or Power Rangers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh yeah, I don't do- I don't do well- I'm not in- no uniforms. It's a uniform and other Sonichus and Rosechus.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'm just wondering if you'd do another impression: What does Blachu sound like? Uh, Black Sonichu? Or Blake?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eeeeuuunh... Eh... ahhhh...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Can you imitate it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... I'm not sure... uhhhhm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Like does he sound black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Possibly, but I'm not certain. I'm not leaning towards it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I'd like to hear it, but if you don't want...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just never- I just never really thought about that. I'd say that he possibly sounds similar to uh, y'know Shadow the hedgehog. But he could possibly sound, black. He could. Don't quote me on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' All right, I was just wondering if you'd do his voice but...<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Hey why does the BAD guy gotta be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never said the bad guy "has to" be black. (pause) I mean, look at the- the range of villanies, I mean there's black and whites and uh... male females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I noticed that uh- Silvana's also... black lookin'.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just decided to color her black because she was born- she came from outer space from a black egg, which was the- which came out of the rainbow.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah, I was also wonderin' about that like-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I- I- I-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' If Silvana came out of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes it's-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Why would she be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' I mean like black ain't part of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like the black sheep of the family. Y'know you put all the colors together and it does become black.<br /><br />
(unintelligible reactions)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -like a brownish-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) is a (unintelligible) color.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Maybe it's because she's from space and there's not a lot of light in space and it's dark or something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah that- a uh yeah- that's one of the-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hmmm.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhm, did you look at the link of my friend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, ummmm...<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Yeah, since you love blue hair.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh- no I haven't looked at it and I don't wanna make Julie feel jealous if I did- if I went and did.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Julie would mind.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhhh...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You look at pornography don't you?<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' (mumble)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, that- that was two syllables "Rose-chu". You don't- don't add- don't say the "e" it's just "Rosechu".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah you went over this last chat.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>(I don't know, it sounds like "narrator")<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sounds like he says "narrator" again)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh... I was just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, well, obviously the uh- the narrator who did those audio books was incorrect. Specially since I never gave that person the approval to do the audiobooks.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think it's just a fan project and I think he-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' and I think he might have one of the West coast dialects. I know that the South they say y'all but over here-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well obviously he lied-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -different. I'd be proud if they made one of my projects into an audiobook though. That means that there are a lot of fans out there that really like it.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Ay.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' They're not selling to try and make any money off it. They're not trying to rip you off. They always made sure- they always narrate the first page by saying "Christian Weston Chandler" so they're not trying to cheat you or anything.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' The people know you're making it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I- I hear that. I just, apparently they misin- misinterpreted the (audio breaks up) name Rosechu. Or mispronounced it. Misinterpreted, mispronounce- fairly the same thing in that situation... possibly. To answer that question... possibly.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uh, Vivian said that the audiobooks made Sonichu way popular that- than you could ever ever do on your own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I will not disagree with the statement. And I appreciate her help.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris. Would you be offended if a fan wrote a fanfiction about Sonichu?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Faaanfiction... if it's- if it's not demeaning or makes them look stupid. Then it's fine- it's fine. (pause) Like I did mind when, shoot, what's his name? That guy... uhhhh... that guy that the uhhhh... did the animations, on his computer.<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' You did mind or you didn't?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Animations???<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think I know what he's talking about. Are you talking about the um...<br /><br />
<br />
(background noise begins)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' Well the original play was a Greek play. Where they're all y'know... Greeks... and crazy stuff happens and they're all runnin' around in togas. So if you ever wanna see the movie "A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum" it was a classic and it had some real classic people from the 50s and 60s in it. Kinda like "It's a MAD MAD MAD MAD World". Sort of a classic old school movie from funny old school world. First color movie type thing. But that'll be a high school play. You'll wanna see that. You might actually enjoy it. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
(inaudible response)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' You never know that might be fun to do. Well I guess that wouldn't work on the weekend then... you gotta...<br /><br />
<br />
'''(FOR THOSE OF YOU WONDERING WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON, IT APPEARS THAT THERE WAS SOME TECHNICAL PROBLEM THAT CAUSED ANOTHER MUMBLE CHANNEL TO BE RECORDED WHILE THE CONVERSATION WITH CHRIS BECAME BARELY AUDIBLE BACKGROUND NOISE. INSTEAD ALL THAT CAN BE HEARD IS SOME BUTTFACE YAMMERING ABOUT FILMS AND TELEVISION SHOWS. I'M NOT GOING TO KEEP TRANSCRIBING IT. CHRIS IS STILL TALKING AND ANSWERING QUESTIONS, BUT NOTHING CAN BE UNDERSTOOD OVER THESE GUYS.)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''(AT 42.56 THE AUDIO SUDDENLY RESUMES NORMALLY)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Unknown person:''' Uh you-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I uh- noticed he's another BLACK villain.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah in real life he was black. Without meaning any offense to the uh- black guy in general, cause you've noticed, among the Jerkops there's uh- we got black's and white's, males and females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(several people jump in at once)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) -you've never drawn a female officer before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well y'know uhhh... uhhh, comic book number 7, near the end. Near the end of the time travel episode. Uhh, I have no opinion about what Obama's doing cause I don't watch the news.<br /><br />
Accented woman: But you voted for him, didn't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes I voted for him because I saw myself in him when I com- when I saw both the documentaries and downloaded them for the Playstation Network between Obama and McCain. I mean voted for a person I saw more of myself of-<br /><br />
Accented woman: You usually vote for someone based on their political leanings, not how you view them. As I were Republican, I voted for John McCain. Not because I liked him but because I- he had the same political views as me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basi- basically I'm a moderate.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh, I see. Um, I was wondering. I was reading opinions: do you agree with his financial bailouts?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm, I don't even know what it is. So I can't disagree or agree.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Well, to make it short um, it's about uh- the government- President Obama is planning to uh- a new one- (cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You got cut off there.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uhh, ok, we lost him.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yo, Chris, uh, do you, you didn't just vote for Obama cause he was black, did you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I did not vote for him because he was black. I voted for him cause I saw myse- because I saw myself in him. In like, similar lifestyles. And I saw that he was a good man, I mean after all, com- I saw- I saw I watched both of the A&E documentaries, before I can- before I knew who I would vote for.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 45.29)'''<br /><br />
<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris:, Chris what did you see in him that you say in your self?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Like for one thing we were like outcasts, at least one point in our lives.<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Wait, wait hold up earlier you said that you thought he would probably paint the white house black.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh oh that was my father’s joke he said that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Is your father a racist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but you see I drew that for him before I saw the documentaries so respectfully withdrew that comic page.<br /><br />
'''???:''' does your father hate black people.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Not necessarily but it’s just how my father just how my father that does not reflect in any way that’s how he felt (annoying ass noise in the background)<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Man that racist.<br /><br />
'''??? :''' Hey Chris I so the ahh saw the Sonichu and Rosechu love sack that you put up and I thought if was pretty cool for (you adult friends?) I just had a question though: do you have any plans in the comic to have romance between you and one of the hedgehogs I mean-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Yelling) No no no<br /><br />
'''???:''' -we would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' I mean is was just wondering because there are fans how would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Now- now that you answered the his question my kind of relates to his what are your thoughts on inter racial breeding and marriages?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would not agree of disagree with them but in my personal preference I would fell- I would feel more comfortable in having a full relationship with a white woman but I am willing- am still willing to be friends and acquaintances and give and have respect for the black women as well.<br /><br />
'''???:''' What about Asians like Japanese?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I’m ok with them as well (yelling) a once.<br /><br />
'''???:''' So would you get married with a Japanese woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hhhmmmm I would have, yes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> but I’m giving Julie to opportunity here.<br /><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: Julie’s a lucky woman.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris, I was just wondering, is Silvana gonna become one of the good guys, like- like Black Sonichu did before?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There’s a possibility but I have not given that a co- I have not confirmed that yet.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Uh, is she gonna lose the male sexual parts and become a full-fledged woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhhmmm possibly but I haven’t given that- I haven't given that thought either.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Also um I was reading (?Phillip’s?) question, Chris what did you want to be when you were little?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don’t remember, I do not remember. I’m just making it as I go basically.<br /><br />
'''???:''' is there ever gonna be like uh, an end to your sonichu series like a finale?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hmmmm I don’t know, probably would not.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Oh so it keeps going and going?<br /><br />
???: You ever consider making comic about the history of CWCville?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhmmmm an episode dedicated towards that possibility.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris are you going to keep the name changes that you made or are you going back to the original names?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahhh ya I’m keeping the name changes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' But you know umm Nintendo was umm, y'know, they sent you a letter you never really talk about it further.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but at least- at least- the hel- they use to benefit me for the fact that uh allowed me to fix noting in that sense so I couldn’t be sued by such people in that sense.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 50 min)'''<br /><br />
<br />
(scattered reactions)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So the name changes were good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So uh, Chris I was wondering if uh Mary- Mary Lee Walsh Or I guess the new name: Ryam Sla- I don't know-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Sla-weel.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Slaweel, thank you. Uhm, if she were to use her magic to curse Rosechu with a penis, would Soni- what- wou- would that test the relationship between Sonichu and her? While they were fighting the battle to have it removed, I'm just curious.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... Firstly uh, she does not- she does not have the power ch- to do that.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I just thought you know, remember you did the story about 4-cent-garbage and drawing all the- the picture and-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah you what, that's one- that's one thing: drawing them, but not actually putting them on the character.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Cause I think that would be like an epic story though, like to actually have a quest-<br /><br />
Fan: I'll second that.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -to go to have that penis removed from Rosechu. I mean it's a test of romance between her and Sonichu.<br /><br />
(muttering)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And when that prevails and the penis is removed and everybody- everybody lives happily ever after. Y'know that would be awesome.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnnnnnh, I dunno I have to- I dunno I have to think about that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It is a really good idea. I like it.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I do too.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah, that's good.<br /><br />
Other fan: It could show just how much Rosechu means to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I'll- I'll consider it but I'm not making any promises.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' We understand.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(several talking at once)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -decided on that subject?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm working on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' If you actually decide to go forward with that story? Do you think maybe- maybe you could give her a talking penis?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!!!<br /><br />
(laughter from various people)<br /><br />
(unintelligible responses)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ok, I think- I think we've talked enough about that one guys.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I have a question that doesn't involve penises.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Anyway, my question is since we've been hearing lot of vicious lies and slander about this, could you confirm exactly why you've been fired from your job at Wendy's Chris? Cause we've been hearing all sorts of- of crazy things and we wanna know the truth.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmmmmmm... well, firstly, what have you heard?<br /><br />
'''Other guy:'''Well we heard that uh you... we've heard so many things like you helped a small child and you did a Donald Duck impersonation and you scared the child.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... also that- also that is correct but I did not scare the child. The child was tired, I was only trying ta- I was only trying to make the child feel better. That's a little amusement. But I did not make the child cry, the child was already- was just tired.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' So you didn't help them cut their food and... yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I did help them- help them get their food to- by giving them uhh, by giving them bags and a top for their baked potato boat.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris, when will um, the pictures of Zapina, appear on the um, 18 plus page?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that was a deleted scene! That was a deleted scene.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Why was it deleted?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basically, hhh... y'c- y'cant' really have it if you don't have Rosechu working to take the- working to take the pictures of herself up in the bathroom. Cause like can't have one without the other.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaahhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I don't know if this is a good question but there's something I wonder about that- we kind of have this DVD you made and... y'know, we never unfortunately got... but I'm curious um... do you ever plan to release it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I'd pay money for that, I think everyone else here would probably pay money for it too.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Indeed.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (breaking up) I wanna ask a question.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I hear it's also on YouTube.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris do you know that you've influenced the rap/hip hop community?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmh... uh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I just wanted to mention that because I saw some YouTube videos and it- and- and from some underground hip hop artists such as Immortal Technique and they've sampled some of your voice audio complaining about your struggles with uhm... with the school board, with the security guards and they were- they felt so empowered that they actually took those words and mad'em into a very powerful rap song. How does that- how is your reaction to that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhhhh... basically I have not watched those videos so... I don't have an opinion.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I will provide you a link to that, hold on a moment.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh that's ok, actually I uh, did sample one. The one where they basically played the parody from "Can't touch this".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, no, trust me it's waaay more serious than that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I still haven't heard of- heard of what you're talking about.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Nevermind.<br /><br />
(rustling and moving noises)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do an impression of MC Hammer?<br /><br />
(more clicking and rustling)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Can't touch this do do do doo do dooo Can't touch this! Do do do dooo do do do... can't touch this.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' That was- heheheh.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Awesome.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you- can you do Dr. Nick Riviera from the Simpsons?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> HIIII EVERYBODY!<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hello Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hi Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hi Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that should say Dr. Nick cause that's who I'm imitatin'.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''???:''' That uh-<br /><br />
'''???:''' HELLOOO EV'RYBODY!!!!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well that-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hi Dr. Nick!<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Thank you, I love the Simpsons.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do... Peter from Family Guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhenhenhenh... Hey Lois! Look at me! I'm just (unclear) you nose, and I'm eatin' your nose.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh that's dead on.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Oh would you- Omicron's been interested in tis- would you actually make a documentary like- like your other DVD but make your daily life?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... I'm... yeah I might but uh... I'm not su- I'm not sure bout it at the moment.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaaaaaaanh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris can you do Mario? You know from Super Mario?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hay paisano! How you doin' mistah hedgehog!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's very good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then Sonic- then Sonic would say "what?!?"<br /><br />
(giggling)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris do you have any plans to make a video of yourself taking a dump on a Hexbox?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No! That's gross.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Yeah that was pretty sick right there.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Let's ban him.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's bad enough I cut in half with an axe.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> and one of the elevator jokes...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Oh we remember that, that was a classic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And I earned a trophy for that.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmm...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Yeah, I remember that, it was destroying a Hexbox by cutting it in half if I remember...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' If I were to draw nude Zapina fanart, uhm, would you put them on the site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... uhh, your- you uh- free to draw them at your- at your own- own preference, but I will not be- I will not put it on the website because- cause- because I will not want to break any laws of having underage portrayals- portrayals of underage nudity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Isn't Dot a child?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry... what?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dot, from Animaniacs.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' So-uh- uhm- I think I looked up somewhere that um, drawings do not count, they're just lines on paper not like real pictures that are horrible.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah I believe-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Draw-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (cut off)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Those illustrations do not count as child pornography. Because with drawing it's art- it's artistic merit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Welll... I dunno, I guess it depends I have to- but- y'know you could do the drawing and I'll think- I'll consider it.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, would it be possible to get any pictures of Sonichu having anal sex with Rosechu?<br /><br />
(pause... thumps and feedback)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm considering that but...<br /><br />
'''Accented woman''' Who keeps letting this person in? You are very offensive.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -and and, if you draw those, do you think that Rosechu would actually clean Sonichu's penis off with her mouth (laugh) w-when they're done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nah, no, I don't think so, I think- I think- I think it would be unh- yeah w-wash it off with a washcloth.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Do you think then, at that point then they would sell the washcloth on eBay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!<br /><br />
(people talking over each other)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, no, no more potty humor, all right?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah alright, okay<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Unrelated to party humor, I want to ask that in your Springbreak uhh Issue of Sonichu you had an introduction of a, of new character, the [[Yawning Squirtle|squirtle]] and I wanna ask<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:''' (interrupting)</span> No, that's, no, no, no, that's not just a character, I was, I was not introducing a new character, I was just doing like a poster thing for a bubble speak under one, I thought I just draw some water type pokemon un-in there<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I understand but the thing is there is huge cult following for that character and I strongly suggest that you should capalize on that and, and make him to a main character<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eh... No, I don't think so<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's just sleeping Squirtle work- waking up!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, people just thought he was really cute and yawning Squirtle, I don't know, I heard someone say, man wouldn't it be great if he would be that [[Autistic|dopey]] sidekick that he'd come and they'd be like, like, he'd come in and say something silly after someone did something and they would be like "Squirtle"!<br /><br />
People laughing and talking over each other<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um...<br /><br />
???: Yo, it makes you *unintelligible* (Chris and someone talk over another)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yes Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I'm asking you about... Hm... Never mind, I lost my train of thought. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's okay. These guys made me lose a train of thought as well. Doesn't multiple inputs.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yes, kinda lotta control here. I might- I may have to... never mind<br /><br />
Silence<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I never lose my train of thought because I have a GPS tracking system on it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, that was a good joke. (chuckle)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, could you tell us a joke right now. Just any joke.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay, here is a fuck- here is a funny- here is a funny mind scream. Funny rhyme scheme... not to be taken literally:<br /><br />
On your Game Boy Advance SP<br /><br />
create 'yer MII<br /><br />
den play it on WII<br /><br />
with your PSP<br /><br />
hooked to your PS3<br /><br />
cause it's fun<br /><br />
see?<br /><br />
And never ff, and never play a [[Hex Box]] 360<br /><br />
Because it's stupid and you're not a dummy (in childlike voice)<br /><br />
Mock laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That is really good.<br />
'''Fan''': Chris is that something you made up?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I made that up.<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Chris, Chris, can I write that down and tribute to quote you that? Oh man, that's good<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) So you mean to type it up and you quote me on the rhyme scheme?<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Yeah, I'd like that. I've been thinking about making a quote book like a mini Chris quote book like something you could open and have a cool line to say when you're on a party and you're like right things.<br /><br />
People talking over Chris and Alucard<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, well I'm typing it up for Alucard, so...<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Thank you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, can we hear one more?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay well here, okay um, okay here is an [[Christian's sex joke|adult joke]] I once come up with a long time ago.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': This is going to be good!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright- Alright there's this married couple, Bob and Jane, and they've been- they were looking forward to having children. So, one night, Bob comes home from work, and uh Jane says, "Hi, you had a good day, dear?" And he sa- and she sa-- he says, "Nah, it's been a long day, darling" And she said, "Well, it's okay, why don't we go upstairs, and we'll have some Breakfast." And he says, "Breakfast, at Nine p.m.?" And she says, "Sure, you bring the MILK, and I'll get an EGG."<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yo, I heard that before, man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then later, they had a boy and a girl, Junior Bacon and Orange Juice. All Part of a Balanced Breakfast.<br /><br />
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif]]<br /><br />
Perplexed silence<br />
<br />
'''Fan''': Hey, Chris, how do you solve a Mexican tank?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Stand in front of it?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': No, man, shoot the guys pushing at it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fans''': Oh that's a good one.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' I got one.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get a bunch of [[Niggos|blacks]] in a car?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Throw some chicken in.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get them out of the car?<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Job application.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What do you call a beach of black people buried up to their necks?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Afro-turf.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I came up with one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what's the difference between a black man and a pizza?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': A pizza can feed a family of four.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': How do you stop black people from jumping on a bed?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, enough racist jokes.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Put velcro on the ceiling.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enough, enough black jokes.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, uh Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Sorry<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I showed by friend that over 18 site, and he said, that he um, he um, you know he, he masturbated to it. Does that make you feel (interrupted)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's good, that's basically the reaction I would be going for. Among the male ca... among the male population, being attracted to the women.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But those are your drawings, it's like, I think he's gay now. I mean, you're a guy and you drew those.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm drawing, I'm drawing female characters.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yah, but it's drawn by you and you're, like, I don't know. It's kind of awkward for me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris, I actually need to thank you, the pictures on that site, it looked like the camera was inside Sonichu's penis when Rosechu was giving him a blowjob. That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. I've always wanted to have a camera in my penis so that I could see that if I ever got a blowjob, that would be awesome, I just wanted to say thank you very much for that perspective. It's the first time I've ever seen it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': There's a question here on the site, oh sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, well I see it... no I don't basically masturbate to my own drawings.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But you're okay if other people do, right? Even guys?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You're okay if other people, you know, masturbate to your drawings? Even if they're guys, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If the guys are masturbating to the female drawings, then yes, that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I just thought it was kind of awkward, but maybe I'm seeing it a different way.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I doubt that, uh, having a whole bunch of drawings of naked female characters can be misinterpreted as something else.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Can I to ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': One time, a friend and I were looking at porn together, and we masturbated together, but the porn was straight, ordinary porn. Is this gay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I'm sorry, where you looking at naked women?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Yes, but we were in the same room, masturbating.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, if you both were thinking about the naked women you were looking at, then I would definitely say you both are straight, cuss you're not thinking about each other, you're thinking about the women.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Right. <br /><br />
'''Fan''': Would you do that with someone?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': I'm relieved.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Man, nigger you gay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Shut up. Would you do that with someone? Like a guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Nah, I'm straight dog.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I'd, yeah I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Omnicron has a question on here, on the side here.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You see it, or?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. That's not straight.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what about the earlier question.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, the one before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, which one before? Oh, you mean...<br /><br />
(All talk at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, what do you think about-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wait, wait let him answer.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Let him answer that one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was gonna rephrase it but okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'd say it would depend on your interpretation, what is adultery to you?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But, you know, isn't the Bible only supposed to be interpreted, it's the word of God, you're not really supposed to interpret it any other way.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': It is what it is.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's in English.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh, I have no comment.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, that's what my, uh, you know I was talking about my mom saw those drawings. I mean, not the drawings, the posters, the playboy posters and that's basically what she got bad about. She said I was committing adultery.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah okay, if you don't want to talk about it, fine.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, hmmm, I think you shou, I think you should, uh, when you, I think I can see where this could be interpreted one way or another, it depends on how you look at the woman. I mean, alright, you're looking at the, uh woman, you might imagine her naked, but, I mean, you would respe- I mean, you would, you would still respect, I mean, if you were still respecting that woman, you would appreciate her more for like who she was aside or in addition to the nudity, then that's not as bad as just, as just only doing it for the appearance.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's why, uh, that's why the playboy magazines, they give you the introductions of the women. It's like letting you know who they are (unintelligible).<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh but, yeah, but there weren't any, uh, descriptions under the, yeah never mind.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Thank you for the clarification Chris.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris, do you love America?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm patriotic.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's good. I was wondering if you could sing the national anthem for us?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [[Wikipedia:My Country, 'Tis of Thee| My country tis' of thee. Sweet land of liberty. Of thee, of thee I sing.]] I don't remember the rest.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Lands where my fathers died.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Land of the pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
(Fans all start singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Stop it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey I'll, I'll tell y'all a funny joke that's kind of patriotic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, you got this, you got this funny Mexican- you got this funny Mexican guy, and he just, he just come back home to Meh-he-co after an American visit. He's like (high pitched voice) Oh the people there are so very friendly. I mean, I go to the basketball game. I sit in the back row. I sit in the back row. And then, and then, and then all of a su- and then all of the sudden right before the game started, everyone turned around, put their hands on their chests, and they say, "Oh say can you seeeeee"!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I thought you said no racist jokes?<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': Yeah man, that ain't cool!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was a name, it was a name joke.<br /><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''':...Spanish language<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm kind of offended by that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': That's racist dog. That ain't cool.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': You laugh you support terrorism.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ¿Qué?<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What'd you say?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What the hell? Who said that?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Forget it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I said, you laugh, you support terrorism.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, he's gone.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Awful Mr. T impression) I pity the fool, who try and misinterpret things, and twist them around, and then jam new words into my mouth.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You do a good Mr. T<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah you do.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) no jibber jabber.<br /><br />
(Fans laugh)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, did you watch the A-team back in the day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No but, no but, basica- but I have seen Mr. T. And then I also, I also saw when he guest, when he quest starred in an episode of Alvin and the Chipmunks.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I saw that episode, he helped uh Theodore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Theodore was getting picked on, yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, you posted a link here.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well at my [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|Methodist church]], uh, sex before marriage is okay as long as, uh, she and I, we love each other very much and truly.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But that's what they tell you, I'm talking about the word of God.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *Sigh* Okay, I'm getting tired, okay, I'm getting tired here, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, but...<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, sorry, no more of that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, you're right. Please stay Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay. Alright, I'll stay a little while longer.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, if anyone does, if anyone asks anything that makes him feel uncomfortable, I'm gonna kick you out of the room.<br /><br />
(Everyone speaks)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Chris, could you give me some advice?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I have a Japanese friend, he's, he's actually 26 and he's never had a girlfriend and we asked him some questions, just joking around one day. And we asked him if his, when he gets married, if his wife wanted to sleep with another man, would he be okay with it, and he actually said yes, as long as she wasn't being forced. Now that kind of bothered us, because us Americans, right, we think that marriage, and you know you're with somebody, they should be faithful, but he doesn't seem to think so, so I wanted to see if you had any advice maybe on what we could do to try and convince him that his viewpoint is wrong.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, hmm, it's not necessarily that the viewpoint is wrong. See, the thing is, what, to, to quote, to make it accepta- to make it like as if you're actually cheating on somebody, cheating on your spouse in the marriage, it's like not telling them, not telling him, not telling him or her about it beforehand, but it's like, you know, you, it's like you tell them beforehand and you get their approval, it's, it's okay, even if they don't want to be part of it. But not telling them, that's definitely like uh, cheating on them.<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that's another thing I would have to think about, cause, got a bit of a, couple of items of destruction that need to be repaired<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I just got, I just talked to that one friend I was talking about who, uh, saw your website, the 18 one, and it turns out he's, he's gay, he's actually gay and he fapped to, uh I mean he masturbated to, uh, Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hahaha, your friend's a fag.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': And I think he's...<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out for 15 seconds)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ...about that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I think in case you would definitely want to let him know that you are straight and you don't want that kind of relationship, and maybe, and you know<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I tell him just to get the hell away from your site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm not saying that, but like, uh, you know, you don't want that kind, you don't, I mean that's, that's basically confirmed on that note. So, uh, you want, you still wanna be friends but you don't, but you're not into that kind of thing.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I mean, he was looking at your site, like, the 18 site and he was in like, um-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Over 18.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': The over 18 site you made. The loveshack. I thought he was just like, you know, masturbating to Rosechu, but it turns out he was attracted to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *sigh* Uhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, I don't think I'll be friends with this guy anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, yeah, then tell him, yeah, to get the hell out of your house and stay away if you don't want to be friends anymore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Seems like you know too many gay friends mister.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh shut up.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris, you know how-<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's not my fault. <br /><br />
'''Another fan''': You know how cologne or perfume, you know, women wear that to try and attract men? Do you think that farts attract gay guys to each other?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Now that's stupid! Not only is that stupid, but it's gross.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Here, I'm gonna take that question and I'm gonna, I'm gonna take that question and spin that into something that's less weird. What would you say the best cologne or whatever a guy could wear to get a girl's attention?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I recommend [[Axe|Axe]] body spray.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh yeah? I think I tried that one time.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': That actually does it for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What scent do you use?<br /><br />
(All speak)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Don't you use ass body spray?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Mmm, love it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Does the Axe effect, does it really exist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Does Axe exist?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, the Axe effect. You know, they say in the commercials spray it and girls will come to you.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) and it works for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Has it worked for you Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, well, yeah, I, yeah I haven't got that working for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I think it's a scam personally.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I mean... I mean, Old Spice is pretty good. I had, I had like a couple of girls go up to me asking me for dates with Old Spice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I actually wore that Orion sent, uhh, still smelling it. So it will work Chris, you just gotta give it time.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Using the Axe.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Cameron but, isn't Axe spray for men?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': No no no no no no no, see, see I said a boyfriend, a boyfriend that I met.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, okay.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah. *laughs*<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That makes sense.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, silly, silly. I have a question for you Chris, what celebrities have you met?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Well what I'm saying is the Axe effect doesn't work. Okay, sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't actually met other celebrities in person, my real life, unless you count a local radio DJ.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I've met the DJ of my radio station 95.1 and [[Excel Saga|Monica Rial]], and meeting Monica Rial was just a treat.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ahhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was, it was good.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, she's pretty.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Maybe you should go to her and, um, maybe she could be like a contact for voice acting. I mean, you do pretty good imitations.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Do Homer Simpson!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Homer Simpson impression) Oh, look at me! I'm a stupid old person, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp, D'OH!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That was awesome<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Who else can you do Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What other imitations can you do?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, a lot. It depends on if you name it, I might recall, if you name the person or character I'll, if I can recall my memory than I will imitate that person.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Can you try Bender from Futurama?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I reckon I can do a pretty good Bender! I can twist off my arm and, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, um, since my girlfr-(clears throat)-sorry. Since my girlfriend broke up with me, I was just wondering if you could give me any tips to like, pick up y'know, another girlfriend?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) Valentine's Day is coming.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah. It's gonna be lonely without her, y'know.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah I know.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Can you help?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) No I do not know what tha- neither of them sound like in voices so I can't imitate them. (sigh) As for- as for dating advice uh, if you're- when you're going out to meet a woman, and this is like advice that's like it could've been taken from my, taken from my own advice I gave in the, the one in the video I did when I just turned 25. But it was definitely, it was given, but it was offered in this book written by a nine-year-old.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> When you're going to uh find yourself a woman, you just try to stay calm. And uh be polite, friendly. Don't uh let your nerves get the best of ya.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What should I say, what should I say here, y'know, to the girl?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Start with "hello" and "how are you".<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I ask her, should I like do a pick-up line? Do those work?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Um, sometimes. But I wouldn't, I wouldn't exactly count on it in a desperate situation. But I mean like uh, talk about yourself a little bit saying like, "Ooh did you read in the paper today about this article that really caught my eye?"<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was thinking about standing by the wall with a sign. Saying that I need a girlfriend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, don't- don't do that. That makes you look retarded.<br /><br />
(Laughter)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What about wearing a sticker that says you're single. Have you ever tried that? Do you think that would work?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what was that? A stick-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wearing like a uh, a sticker that says "I'm single".<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Wait a second I'm not done yet.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Oh I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I got that idea from your comic. I mean I thought it was a-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. I later learned that that, I already learned from my mother that made me look retarded. (Female fan laughs) To other people, so...<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Ohh. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So I stop- So I stopped- So I stopped doing that a long time ago and, I don't know (what payed attention?)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mm. Basically I'm running from others that have offered such advice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh yeah like John Tesh I remember that in your news dash.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. And also it's like uh there's an expression in my elementary somewhere uh, those who can't teach.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Um, I remember (unintelligible). Um, I was um, looking at um (something), how do you feel about Obama swearing in his book? Even read it out loud in the audiobook version.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hm. (rustling and typing in the background) Hm. Ah, yeah I heard of that, didn't care much, didn't uh give much thought into it so... Uh swearing yeah don't care much for it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': So Chris I was just wondering uh, like can you hear me?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I can hear you.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Uhh. Does wearing that medallion, does that attract females? I was thinking about making my own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) You could do what you want, to try and make yourself stand out. Um... But it depends on if you, it depends on other peoples' point of uh you I guess at this point, um... You might want to get a second opinion. I mean it's not like I can see you over da Mumble and uh say what makes you look okay and what makes you look NOT okay. Yeah, g- get a second opinion from somebody else in person.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What about you, do you think that medallion makes you look, y'know, more attractive to girls?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhmmm. Yeah. Yeah I don't know. I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah I think it looks pretty cool on you. So that's, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well you could try it, see if you could try and see if it works for ya.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Speaking, speaking of the medallion, I noticed you wear it on the outside. Have you ever done any replacing the chain on it to something a little more comfortable?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh no. It's fine. It's fine. I mean I'd say that this uh the necklace chain with the like a pair- like a pair of- like a pair of keyrings with a belt buckle on them.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm. Alright.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris in hentai, the uh guys- like the girls usually say no but the, the guy touches her a bit and she gets into it. I was just wondering if you think that really works, have you ever tried that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh. I'm sorry, could you repeat that?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': I said in hentai, y'know the Japanese um, kinda pornography-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Yeah-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': -usually, the, the girl kind of says no but then the guy starts touching her boobs or something and she gets real excited and gets into it. I was just wondering if you think that really works. Can you just make a girl excited and into you just like t hat?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhh... Yeah I don't think so. I me- I mean in most of the time I'm sure you would probably just, the girl would probably just turn around and slap you right in the face or kick you in the groin.<br /><br />
(Various pained groans)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, you were saying it's educational. I think I saw that in a porn too.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Uh. Also (unintelligible) asked "How far have you gotten with a girl"?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I've never even been on a first date in my lifetime.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ohhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> At this point.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris?<br /><br />
(Fans talk over each other)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I was suggesting uh Chris, I have family in Bristow, Virginia. I've been out there a lot. And you know, they're- I mean, people that I've seen in Virginia don't really like anime and things that much. Have you ever considered maybe trying to meet a girl in the west coast? Because a lot of people, especially universities are into anime culture. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) Yeah but I'm no- I'm not planning on traveling outside of my state. Plus I would prefer to keep it local.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah.<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
(Everyone talks over each other)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but to see the world means to have to have the money to actually go see the world.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Well You just have to save up a little bit.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah. I mean you know, trains are good.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': (strange incognizable noise)<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Gas is cheap now.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': You can meet so many people just going on a road trip or just you know, taking the bus or something I mean it's not too expensive, it's cheaper than a plane- (Chris talks over him)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Yeah, I hear you on that. But I just like, you know, if I want to go on a road trip I'd uh, I would not like to go it alone. I'd like to have my sweetheart by my side.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Mmm.<br><br />
'''Fan''': The point is you could always get a job. That's what I did once a-(cut off)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh.<br><br />
(Fans talk over each other)<br><br />
'''Other fan''': -and I wanted to meet a girl? I got this t-shirt that says "ask me about my large and attractive penis" and I wear that to the mall and it works every time.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Are you kidding, really?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yes. (cut off)<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Well that's interesting. (laughs) I have to meet you some time. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah boy. Uhh, alright, gentleman's clubs um...<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what was that noise just now?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Noise?<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I heard like a (snorts) noise.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Yeah, that was probably me be- because I was like objecting to the uh, when he was describing what it said on his t-shirt.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah that wasn't cool. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': You guys have no taste. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah-<br><br />
'''Guy''': Disgusting!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I know.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay um. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>But it just uh, just it m- just ma- I mean the way I see it, see somebody else wearing that it makes, it uh, it makes- it s- it would appear that guy is only looking for sex and women would be turned by sh- sh- sex right away at that point.<br><br />
'''Guy''': Yeah it kinda sums up (cut off)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Um, so...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um... (Chris and Fan talk over each other) Yeah let me answer this guy's question. Yeah I don't know much about gentleman's clubs so I can't really answer that question. A, and uh... <br><br />
'''Fan''': What about you though, like when you're looking for a girl, does like sex really matter? Like, to attractiveness?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, er, yeah. Eventually the se- yeah. Attractiveness does matter in one point of view but uh, but if you think about it it's like you want to get to know the person, the woman inside as well. Um, so, (I'd rather be in it?) so like uh, we were very close to each other emotionally and like friends, then the sex. Like uh, how Panda and I were very... close.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Hmm.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': What happened to Panda?<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah what happened to her?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't heard fermer- I haven't heard from her in over two weeks and then recently there were, there was the fires in Australia close to by where she was. So I don't know whether she's still alive or not. I haven't heard from her in over a coupl- over two weeks.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': That's awful.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah. I heard it was real bad, it was like a hundred and eight people died from those fires.<br><br />
'''Black fan''': Daaaamn!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but you know it's okay that at least I have uh, at least I have uh, at least I have a good woman who w- who's willing to uh be at my side at this point.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Man... Uh-<br><br />
(Multiple people talk at once)<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': -for the people who are dead?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': So you feel no remorse for the people who have died in Australia?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh no no, I DO feel remorse. Especially to Sarah sh- eh- I mean... I worry about her she's still ali- I worry about- I'm concerned if she's actually dead or still alive.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah I'm sorry to hear that.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I me- I mean, I mean I'd li- I mean I pray every day that she's still alive safe and well. And that she contact me soon.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': But you... you automatically, you basically abandoned her for Julie.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But I did not basically abandon her for Julie.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': That is what it appear- seems like.<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh)...(sigh)<br><br />
'''Fan''': She could be still alive, you never know.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Even if she isn't still alive, take solace in the fact with her perfectly barbequed remains fed to survivors.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> SHUT UP!!!<br><br />
'''Fan''': Um, that was too far, you're going too far man.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. And at this point I care about both- I care about of uh both of them equally. Both uh Sarah and Julie. But it's like, it's like you know uh, I'm uh stil- if she let's me- if she uh gets in contact with me, letting me know that she's still alive, and uhh she...<br><br />
'''Fan''': But I'm letting you know Julie, if she's still alive what are you gonna do then?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': And if people actually did eat her what would you do to them?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> OH SHUT UP!!!! Kick that guy out!<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
(laughter in background)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay um. Uh...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, but you know in all seriousness if Sarah gets in contact with me and lets me know she's gonna be coming my way in real life, and uh-<br><br />
'''Fan''': You're not gonna dump Julie are you?<br><br />
(uneasy pause)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I wouldn't dump Julie as a friend.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh but! Oh...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie I still, Julie I still love you.<br><br />
'''Late guy''': Hello everyone.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But you told me I was your sweetheart, didn't you?<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh hello, Doctor.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm. (stress sigh) Julie I'm going through a- I'm going through a transition right now so it's kind of hard for me to make uh, short watch of what I say at points and y'know answering these kind of questions.<br><br />
'''Fan''': I'm sorry uh, I don't mean to offend you or anything. Well I was just wondering-<br><br />
'''Guy''': (unintelligible) guy Chris. <br><br />
'''Other guy''': Uncalled for. <br><br />
'''Black fan''': Y'know what, don't worry about Sarah. Cause, y'know it usually takes like, like months for a person, like a victim of a fire or a flood of some crap like that, to y'know find shelter and then phone and internet and all that.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': You know, if the place is in a state of emergency, people are getting moved around all over the place, there's people in the hospital, I'm sure she's fine she just can't y'know talk to anyone.<br><br />
'''Guy''': What about Alucard's question?<br><br />
'''Fan''': Wait, yeah.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) Uh, I can't answer that question.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm?<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Why not?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because I'm still in a transition right- I'm still in a transition from Sarah to Julie at this point so uh I can't answer that question right now cause I wouldn't know how to answer it.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': It seems-<br><br />
'''Guy''': So you "transition"?<br><br />
'''Fan''': It's a hard choice, I can't blame you I mean, yeah.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I mean you know what, that's- that's a flat out bad question, I mean I would- I'd be able-<br><br />
'''Other guy''': It's quite valid.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (aggravated) Auuuughh! Okay now I'm gettin' uh, okay now my head's out of order.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Oh.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': I've had that problem too.<br><br />
'''Guy''': It's never fun.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay forget it then.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Uh okay I got, I got one. Impressions, impressions! Uh, can you do one of Bill Clinton?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... no.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Um, Chris? Do you-<br><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh)<br><br />
'''Other guy''': I was wondering do you watch the Boondocks on Adult Swim?<br><br />
'''Black fan''': Aw yeah that's my show!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I've watched the Boondocks.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Did you enjoy it?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's alright.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Can you do any imitations of the characters there, like Uncle Ruckus?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent gibberish) -dem niggers over there! Sing along if you know the words to that song I just made up.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': What was that?<br><br />
'''Guy''': That was, wait, what?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That was Uncle Ruckus. Well I'll tell ya what I sell propane and propane accessories all day long! (begins a high-pitched cackling and squeals more gibberish)... That was-<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Could you do Meowth from Pokemon?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Meowth!<br><br />
'''Fan''': The talking Meowth.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Meowth! ... (cackles again) Aye Jessie, James, we gotta go snag that Pikachu again!<br><br />
'''British guy''': Do you know how to do the Team Rocket song?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, the Team Rocket song er, do you mean the motto?<br><br />
'''British guy''': Myes the motto, the classic one.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Hmmmm... Prepare for trouble make it double, to protect the world from devastation, to uni- to unite all people- o- (sigh)...<br><br />
'''Guy''': ...in our nation!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mm. Anyway... (sigh) Hang on I'm a little mixed up here. Prepare for trouble make it double, to protect the world from devastation, to unite all people within our nation, to debi- to debide(sic) the evils of truth and love, to extend our reach to the stars above. Team Rocket blast off to the speed of light, surrender now or prepare to fight.<br><br />
'''Guy''': ... Meowth, that's right.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': That's right!<br><br />
(chuckling)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Now hand over the Pikachu!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. (sigh)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Oh come on-<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': -than Sonichu, because Sonichu is obviously more powerful than Pikachu!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I will not hand over the Sonichu, so there. (pause) Alucard, stop asking the questions please?<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': Yes Alucard you are very annoying.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah someone kick him out.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br><br />
'''Guy''': Good goin' Canine.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
''''Canine'': Anytime. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm. Actually I'm k- actually I'm kind of tired now uh... I'm gonna- I'm gonna head on down now but y'know I'll come back another night.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Okay.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': Well thanks for coming Chris, we really appreciate it.<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: No. I've got a few questions for you Chris, I've been waiting.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Clyde no, no, no.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': How did he get in here?<br><br />
(Everyone yells over each other)<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: It's important!<br><br />
'''Guy''': Ohh he leeeft!<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: No, no, shut up, shut up-<br><br />
'''Other guy''': He's not coming back, give up.<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: Tell him it's important it's about Panda!<br><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm digesting her right now.<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: That will get him back in, I know it.<br><br />
'''Guy''': What's the important news?<br><br />
<br />
[End recording]<br />
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{{Transcription}}<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 6|Mumble Chat 6]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 8|Mumble Chat 8]]|}}<br />
<br />
==Links==<br />
* [https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBWklfakp0TGdDSkU Download]<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
<br />
[[Christian's sex joke]] - Used during this chat.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_7&diff=163097Mumble 72012-09-29T06:18:22Z<p>Irisviel: /* 28:35 Chris impersonates various cartoon characters */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''Mumble 7''' is the seventh of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]], held on 13 [[February 2009]].<br />
<br />
Appears to be the genesis for the "Power" videos in which Chris attempts and fails to prove his [[I AM STRONG|strength]] and [[CWC Fighter|fighting]] [[Challenge For Clyde|skill]], though these would not materialize for several months.<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
* A fan talks to Chris about putting naked posters of girls and pictures of men up in his room up to find out if his friend was a [[homo]] as Chris suggested. He tells Chris that his girlfriend dumped him over the posters and his friend ignored all of them. Chris sees nothing wrong with his advice until Julie tells him that she wouldn't like that. Chris recommends sending an anonymous letter explaining the situation and utterly fails to apologize or show concern.<br />
* Fans point out that Chris shouldn't have to show and prove that he is straight.<br />
* Chris cuts a fan off to let Julie ask a question involving [[pedofork|shota]].<br />
* Fans ask Chris to turn his radio down.<br />
* Chris uses Wal-Mart printer paper & RSVP ballpoint pen to draw, and a 50-pack of Crayola markers to color. Refuses to use color pencils or Photoshop to color, saying he prefers the markers.<br />
* Chris talks about Omicron's redone version of [[Sonichu]], accusing him of plagiarism. Says that the difference between what Omicron is doing and what he is doing is that Sonichu is his. Agrees to let Omicron continue if he credits Chris with the copyright.<br />
* '''Julie is convincing Chris to make videos proving to Clyde how strong he is.''' Chris feels that the [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|dildo breaking video]] proved this. Fans say that Chris's dildo comes apart naturally for cleaning.<br />
* '''A fan recommends making a video showing off his fighting moves to scare Clyde.'''<br />
* Chris is asked why he would use a dildo in proving that he is straight. Chris says that he is straight for crushing it, fans call him a [[homo]] for keeping it.<br />
* Chris [[lie|denies]] [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|using the dildo]], and claims that it's now broken. Fan says it could easily be reassembled. Chris is adamant that it was glued and that it took a lot of strength to pull it apart.<br />
* When asked by Julie, '''Chris admits using super-shears from Cutco to break the dildo glue, claiming to use a lot of strength in the process'''.<br />
* Fans discuss [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]]. Chris insists that it was drawn in protest of [[ED]]. He says it was anonymous, as most women have long brown hair and her eyes were censored.<br />
* Insists that [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:AngelicainGod%27sEyes.JPG the Rule 34 of Angelica Rosechu] is masturbating and enjoying it, and is using her hand to do it.<br />
* Chris thinks Billy Mays is on Home Improvement.<br />
* Chris isn't doing anything on Valentine's Day, as Julie is not there yet.<br />
* Chris discusses the the No-Redheads policy in his [[Love Quest]]. Says that redheads don't attract him unless they are not natural redheads. No piercings or tattoos allowed.<br />
* Chris is OK with blue hair.<br />
* Does a terrible Marge Simpson impersonation.<br />
* Chris impersonates Comic Book Guy and Donald Duck.<br />
* A fan presents the possibility that AIDS was sent by God to kill the [[homos]].<br />
* [[Chris and Religion|Premarital sex being forbidden in Christianity]] is discussed. Chris fumbles for an explanation.<br />
* '''A fan pretending to be black says he believes the government made AIDS to get rid of black people. Chris says that that's the kind of thing a black guy would say'''.<br />
* Premarital sex comes up again. Chris compares it to using porn to practice and learn skills for later.<br />
* The fake black fan calls Chris on his comment from earlier about black guys and AIDS. He makes the excuse that someone else said it first.<br />
* Questions on Sonichu start. Sonichu doesn't wear clothes because it's a comic. Chris isn't sure how [[Blake]] sounds. He might sound black, he might sound like Shadow the Hedgehog. The fake black fan asks why the bad guy has to be black, also mentioning [[Silvana]]. Chris says that he doesn't have to be.<br />
* Chris gets annoyed about the pronunciation of [[Rosechu]] as popularized by the Old Narrator of the [[Audiobooks]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't disagree that the Audiobooks made Sonichu more popular that he ever did'''.<br />
* He doesn't mind fanfics that don't portray Sonichu in a bad light.<br />
* The audio goes low in the main chat and a fan has a private, unrelated conversation for a few minutes.<br />
* Audio comes back as Chris is admitting that the [[B-Manajerk]] was black in real life.<br />
* Chris doesn't watch the news, so doesn't have an opinion on [[Barack Obama|Obama]]. He voted for him because he saw a documentary where he saw more of himself in Obama, namely that he was an outcast at one point.<br />
* A fan says that you should vote based on politics, not personality. Chris says that he is a moderate.<br />
* Chris doesn't know what the financial bailout is. He says that he drew the [[Sonichu 8#The Elevator Gags|racist picture]] of Obama based on his father's joke, before he saw the documentaries that made him vote.<br />
* Chris will not agree or disagree with interracial dating/marriage. He would want a white woman, but he would be [[gal pals|friends]] with others.<br />
* He'd marry an Asian.<br />
* It's not yet known if Silvana will be a good guy or if she will lose her [[pickle|dick]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't know what he wanted to be when he was younger, he's just making it up as he goes along'''.<br />
* '''Chris is keeping the name changes in the comics for legal reasons'''.<br />
* A fan suggests Slaweel cursing Rosechu to have a dick. Chris gets upset before saying that he'll think about it. The fans think it's a great idea. One considers a talking penis for Rosechu. Chris says it's a stupid idea.<br />
* Another fan asks about Chris being sacked from Wendy's. He denies scaring the child with his Donald Duck impersonation, saying that he didn't make him cry.<br />
* Chris might release his DVD one day.<br />
* A fan says that Chris has influenced underground rappers such as Immortal Technique, who has sampled him.<br />
* Chris takes requests. Impersonates MC Hammer, Dr Nick Riviera, Peter from [[Family Guy]], Mario and Sonic, butchering them all and tainting our childhood memories.<br />
* More Sonichu questions. '''Chris won't upload [[Zapina]] [[Rule 34]] because she is underage and Chris is worried about legal ramifications'''. When he is reassured that this would be legal, he says he would consider it. He will also consider Sonichu-Rosechu anal sex. Rosechu would not clean the [[pickle]] with her mouth, she would clean it off with a washcloth. He would not sell the the washcloth on EBay.<br />
* Chris calls a stop to the potty humor displayed throughout the Sonichu questions.<br />
* '''Chris denies that [[Yawning Squirtle]] is a character'''.<br />
* Fans ask for a joke. He recites a dreadful rhyme about Videogame consoles. He then tells his awful [[Christian's sex joke|sex joke]]. Fans start to tell racist jokes about [[niggos|black people]] and Mexicans. Chris calls for a stop to this.<br />
* A fan says that his friend [[mass debating|masturbated]] to the [[rule 34|adult section of Sonichu]] and is now worried that his friend is a [[homo]], as they were drawn by a man. '''Chris says that this is what he intended it for''', and they are drawings of women, so his friend is straight. He doesn't masturbate to his own drawings.<br />
* Chris reassures a fan that [[Mass Debating|masturbating]] in the same room as another man isn't gay as long as both men are thinking of women, but he would not do this.<br />
* Chris offers no comment as to what constitutes adultery.<br />
* Chris says that he is patriotic. Asked to sing the national anthem, he instead mangles a few lines of "My Country, 'Tis of Thee". He then tells a 'patriotic' joke that is insensitive to Mexicans. [[Chris and Hypocrisy|The fans call him on his "no more racist jokes" statement from earlier]].<br />
* Chris does a poor impersonation of Mr T.<br />
* Chris says that if you are married, sleeping with someone else isn't cheating if you have consent from your spouse.<br />
* Chris gives more advice on homos and recommends Axe body spray for attracting girls.<br />
* Chris has not met any celebrities, only local DJs.<br />
* Does impersonations of Homer Simpson and Bender. The two sound identical.<br />
* Chris gives dating advice: Stay calm, polite, friendly and don't let your nerves get the best of you. Say "Hello, how are you" and talk about yourself. '''[[Barbara|His mom]] told him that standing around with a sign makes him look retarded. A female fan cracks up laughing and can't stop'''.<br />
* "Those who can't, teach"<br />
* Chris says he has never even been on a date. Rejects dating suggestions from fans.<br />
* '''Chris was close with Sarah "[[PandaHalo]]" McKenzie, but hasn't heard from her in over two weeks. He heard about the fires and doesn't know if she's still alive. When a fan adds that 108 people were killed in the fires, Chris responds to the entire ordeal with [[Chris and death|"It's OK though, at least I have a good woman who's willing to be by my side at this point"]]'''.<br />
* When pushed, he says he feels remorse for the the victims of the fires and is concerned that [[Sarah Cassandra McKenzie|Panda]] is dead.<br />
* He asserts that he didn't abandon Sarah for [[Julie]].<br />
* '''A fan says that if [[PandaHalo|Sarah]] isn't alive, Chris should take solace that her perfectly barbecued remains fed the survivors. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|SHUT UP!!!]]'''<br />
* Chris says that he cares about Sarah and Julie equally and wouldn't dump Julie as a friend. A fan asks what he will do to the survivors who ate Sarah. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|"SHUT UP!!!"]] and demands that he be booted.<br />
* Fans reassure Chris that Sarah is probably OK.<br />
* Chris does abominable impersonations of Uncle Ruckus from The Boondocks and Hank Hill. '''He sings "Don't Trust Them New [[Niggos|Niggas]] Over There"'''. He also impersonates Meowth and sings the Team Rocket song.<br />
* [[Clyde]] enters. Chris refuses to answer questions and leaves.<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
===Chris proves he is straight===<br />
'''Guy:''' Chris!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all! ''[echoes]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'll be damned.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh, Chris-[gets cut off by another guy]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh you know, can't com- it's uh, can't complain.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' How's construction of the site?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' [unintelligible] so Chris<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I...I need to ask you something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yup?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh... I put those posters, of the... Playboy and everything in my room, and uh, one of my girlfriends saw it, and she got mad at me for looking at other w-... other girls, and she broke up with me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh... I'm sorry to hear that. It could-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, she's calling me a pervert. I-I don't understand this.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Did you... did you ex- did you try to explain to her about situation between you and that guy?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I... I did, and I don't think she understood.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... well, you should try, you should, uh, s-... try, uh, you should try wr-, you should tr-, uh, do you know her email address?<br /><br />
[pause]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So, uh Chris-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' A-also, wait... also, uh, the friend, I was talking about, he, uh, visited, and [typing noises] he, uh, he went into my room, and didn't even notice the posters. He just s-sat in the middle, he didn't s...sit in any uh, part of the room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Huh. Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, uh... so, yeah, I don't know. I mean, my girlfriend broke up with me, called me a pervert, said that I shouldn't be looking at other girls, I mean... I don't know what to do now.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well listen, uh, answer my question, do you have her email address?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Umm... yeah, but she won't... she won't answer me anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm... ok, hmm. Here's what you can do, uh... Do you know your girlfriend's... any of your girlfriend's [[Gal pal|gal-pals]]?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm... well, you should try to... like wr- you should write out... hmm... hmm... here's an idea. S- Write a letter to her and send it via smail mai-, via snail mail, but don't write the return address. On it.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What should I write?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just like, you know, like, they, you know, this is... you know, this is... you, uh, you put your name there, and you, it's, and then you would basically explain the situation between you and that guy, and that's why you had the posters up, well that's why you put the posters up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't really understand what was the point of the posters in the first place?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[sigh]'' it's... ''[sigh]'' if he looks at... if he, if he is very interested, if he is, if he was straight, he would uh, look at the women. Very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But he didn't even notice them. He didn't notice any of the posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, then I guess he is a [[Homos|homo]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' W...well, um, he wasn't looking at anything, not even the guy posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Hmm... He's not blind, surely.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, like, what is he, is he like, uh...I don't know.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I don't know either, man. But, you know at the moment I would suggest you, uh, write the- write the letter to your girlfriend, send the mail, don't write your return address on the envelope, and, uh, mail it to her.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Also my mom saw the posters and she got offended, she's like really religious and st- she said that like, uh, you know, lust is a sin or some shit. Oh, like she said, she's like all against the, the uhh, the like, Playboy in my room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, your- apparently your mom hasn't been [beeps] that open minded that time. So, you know, give her time to reh-cover, she'll uh, she might op- she might open up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I don't think that was a good idea though, I mean, w-why did-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -you suggest it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I was trying to see if he, to, I was trying to s-help you figure out if your uh, if your friend was a homo or not.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I know, but, do you have uh, [Fans talking] Playboy posters in your room?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unclear] I'm very forward.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I have uh, poster of some, of uh, I have a poster in my room of uh, some uh, naked girls I got from adamandeve.com as a bonus.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Then, nobody says anything about it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[clears throat]'' Well, I didn't really have too many oppor- too many people in my room. So, it's kind of like in a hard to notice place.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Um, wondering, um, If you showed anyone, wouldn't they be offended?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe, maybe not, [Fan grunts] it just depends on their point of view.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I wouldn't want the same thing that happened to me to happen to you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I hear you there. Uh, just to so just sound clear... Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie, are you there?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ok, uh, would you be offended if you saw such a poster in my room?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''[breaks up]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, What will, what was that? [Echoes]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie'''</span> Yes I would, kind of.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well that's no problem, I can take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, see that's what I'm talking about, I mean...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, that's why I asked Julie right now, because I respect her. So, because she said that she would, I will take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I've been thinking, um...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you have... [unclear] Chris, I don't think you should look at other woman.[sic] In my opinion.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I see, Julie. Well that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I...I respect that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' She might get jealous, I mean, that's what happened to my...my girlfriend.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, that's fine Julie, I respect your, I respect that. Just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey, can I ask you a question? If uh, he's done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, uh, one more thing, um, you know I've been thinking, uh, I don't really think you need, you know, posters and stuff like,<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' to prove you're straight, I mean, if you're straight, that's all there is to it i-if, am I right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think you're right.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I...I mean, you shouldn't have to prove that you're straight.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> You're right.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I m-mean [line breaks temporarily] Y-you shouldn't have to reassure yours-self. You should just be knowing it, and nothing anybody says, should get very, uh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, it's ve-ah-very-but you see, I have like, I have that [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] in my room, it's just, so that like, you know, for in case I have any-for in case I have any random thoughts, on account really, to tempt me.<br /><br />
''[unintelligible mix of chatter from most participants trying to get their word in]''<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I mean, even if they're random thoughts, even if they're random thoughts, if you know you're ''positive'' about it, you shouldn't have to look at anything to make sure.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, usually.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay. Uh, moving on from all this homosexuality, uh, I have one question, uh- [gets cut off by Chris in the background] ...never mind, [fat douchebag?]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey, ah, let Julie ask a question, let Julie ask her question.<br /><br />
<br />
===7:08 Julie asks about shotacon===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, I was watching you on the Internet yesterday and, what's a shotacon?[slightly cut off]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...I'm sorry, uh-y, I'm sorry, you got cut off, what was that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> What's a sho-[cuts off again]-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...What's a...''short''?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Shot-[cuts off third time, pretty obvious she's saying ''shota'']-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dude, shota.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, shota.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ssshhhh...shota?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, S-H-O-A-T-A [sic].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, it's a word he found online.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, [baby?], yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never heard of that word.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I dunno, if you want to look it up, you can probably find out on an online dictionary...<br /><br />
''[pause, and a weary sigh from someone other than Chris]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'll-I'll take a look. Hang on.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I know some Japanese and I think I've heard that somewhere, like in a magazine or something.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, it's some of that Japanese shit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Probably is. Three moments, I'll look it up.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Okay!<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's radio is audible]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Whoops, that was the wrong one. The wrong bookmark.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' S-H-O-T-A.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I know, I just get the wrong bookmark for...place I wi-for like...dictionary-type website that I have.<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's keyboard taps are audible]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uhhh...Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, now that Julie's done with her question, I also had one.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' He has to find what that means first.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, ''I'm sorry''.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Shit, ah shit, I've just found it on Wikipedia. It's, uh, it's a ma-it's a Japanese name. It's a name of a person. In Japan.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Really.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a Japanese name. I think it's-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh no no, I think you're looking at the wrong thing, it's S- S-H-O-T-A-C-O-N.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> S-H- I mean- O-T-A-C-O-N? Shotacon?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's the same thing, just put C-O-N at the end.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I've read it in a dictionary before, can't remember what it means...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, oh! Okay, here it is, uh..."shotacon, sometimes shortened to shota, is Japanese slang of the phrase 'Shotaro Complex'"...uh..."that describes the attraction to young boys or an individual with such an attraction".<br /><br />
''[Disgusted reactions heard]''<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh my god, what the fuck?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' There's lots of sick people. Y'all are gonna get ricked?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Someone from 4 cent garbage came in and told us to look that up, I didn't-I didn't even want to.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess he's a homo...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Don't worry I banned him already.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Um, Chris, Vivian wants to know if you can like, turn your radio down a bit, it's distracting.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yes, please turn it down.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I thought that was quiet enough, here.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, no, the lady'll probably pick it up<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Alright cool. Merci.<br /><br />
<br />
===10:21 Another fan asks about art supplies===<br />
<br />
'''Another Fan:''' Okay, um, I have a question, um, I like to draw—interrupted by mumbling—I like to draw comics and such, I mean I want to start up a webcomic. What kind of materials do you use?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, like, you mean for drawing?<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well mostly I just use like, uh, paper without lines, like, computer printer paper you can get in, like, Wal-Mart, for an inexpensive price in multiples.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then I use like an RES—RSVP-brand pen with the black ink.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh okay, is it like, um, a gel pen or a ballpoint pen or-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like a ballpoint, it's like a ballpoint pen.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What do you use to color?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I use Crayola brand markers.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would like to—I would—I would—I would recommend getting the Super Tip 50-pack which you can also find at the Wal-Mart.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay. I-[interrupted by someone else on chat]<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's basically-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' At Wal-Mart I usually get the 24-color RoseArts. Those are—those do pretty good too.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhh, Vivian, just so you—just so you know, I'm using the microphone that came with Hey You, Pikachu for Nintendo Sisty-Four [sic].<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, yeah no, no offense, but uh, personally I prefer like, colored pencils and shit cause-[Chris mumbling is heard]-they're like easier to erase. Photoshop [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If you want to use colored pencils that's fine, I'm not, uh, saying that you have to use Crayola markers-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why don't you use colored pencils? They're really good, you should try one on like, at least one page, just try one. One page with just colored pencils.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But um, actually, you can—you can scan your drawings and then color—color them in like, Photoshop or something. [rest of chat murmurs in agreement] That looks really professional, and really good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I prefer using the markers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's just that I-I mean—I mean I've tried—I mean I've colored with colored pencils before, and I just feel best with using markers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I have a question, um, uh, the Hey You Pikachu microphone, how does that work on the, you're using that on your computer? Did you say?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah it's just, yeah, it's like you plug it into uh, into the basic microphone jack.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh, yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Excuse me, I have a nice little Plantronics headset.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Hey Chris can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah, hang on a second, uh... uh, Omicron, that's uh, you're basically, uh, you're basically plagiarizing here. You're even using, uh, parts of my original drawings to, uh, make up your so called real ones and, you're just—you're just parroting—you're just plagiarizing-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's dirty and illegal.<br /><br />
[Unintelligible mumbling]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, you said so yourself, you're being illegal. And plus, and plus I'm-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, isn't combining Sonic with Pikachu the same thing?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, but, but but also, look at this, also I'm looking at this site here, it said, he's claiming the copyright for himself, but he's, but he's not. I mean that's like, but he's, he—he says<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' You need to ban him immediately.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, ban him immediately.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh wait wait wait wait wait...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah maybe you should check-[interrupted by loud noise, probably Chris]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well he said that, he's saying that all of Sonichu material is copyrighted by him, when it's clearly not.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah but you use Sonic and Pikachu, and you copyrighted it-<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' He just offered to give you credit-[interrupted by noisy chatter]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean, I put, I mean, yeah but, I mean, I'm talking about the—the Omnicron [sic] guy here, that's like, just put this link here.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh he offered to give you credit-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes that's the same thing you did.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well no no, he, no-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We decided-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No he's plagiarizing MY Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We just decided [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris it's, it's a parody, kinda like Sonichu is.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but he—yeah, but he's saying, he said—he—on his front page he says, all Sonichu material-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah but he's, he just offered to change it, so are you okay with that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> By changing it to Sonichu X-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, he said he'll give you credit instead of claiming it for himself.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, uh, yeah I would appreciate that, that would be better, yeah, if... he changed that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Alright cool.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Problem solved.<br /><br />
<br />
===15:02 Chris talks about dildos to prove his strength===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes Julie.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you think you could tell everyone about my idea? And, since you're going to do it do you think you could tell everyone so they could look out for it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, your idea... um, oh oh oh, yeah, just basically a video of me standing up to Clyde and showing him how strong I am, doin' a few kicks for the camera or something-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, you should throw some punches, show him what you're made of, you know?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Kick, punch, it's all in the mind ''etc.''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I basically... I pretty much did that when I...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Let him talk, c'mon!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I pretty much did - already proved my strength when I... ripped that... ''dildo'' in half.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Foreign-Sounding Guy:''' Most dildos come apart for cleaning.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' C'mon.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but that thing was screwed together at the seam.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok listen to me...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris...<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' Eh Chris!<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ...could you do a like further test of your strength for me?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''stress sigh'' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I wanna see how strong you are please.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...That's fine, I can do that.<br /><br />
'''Other Fan:''' I mean that's ok, you showed your strength, but you should show her your moves. Like show her, like, what kind of moves you can do.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, let me tell you a story about how this'll work, ok.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' See, my, uh, one of my cousins, uh, this guy at school, kept, y'know, picking on him, calling him gay and stuff, and trying to fight with him, and my cousin told him to sss- y'know, one day, the guy said "Hey man, I'm gonna beat you up" and my cousin said "Look, if I show you some of my moves, I'll prove to you I can kick your ass in a fight" and so my cousin, y'know, he stepped back and, he took, uh, he took Tae Kwon Do, and he did a couple moves, y'know? He just stood there for like five minutes just doing his moves, and, y'know, some punches and kicks and... The guy just backed right off; he didn't even want to talk to him any more. So I think that should work.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> All right, well I'll try that. I'll try that.<br/><br />
'''Guy:''' All right. Sounds good.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br?><br />
'''Fan:''' You try- you always mention about how you're straight but yet in your video about you crushing a dildo, uh, doesn't that kinda like, y'know, not help your cause?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, it proves I'm straight because...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' But you have a dildo.<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I got it free with an order on adameve.com<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' But you ''kept'' it and shit. That ain't cool.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' What I don't... Why were there batteries in...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh yeah Chris, why ''were'' there batteries in it? Why did you keep it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I mean...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it wasn't an easy thing for me to sell, right off the bat, or even to make a profit, so...<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In fact in a way it's a good thing I kept it, cause it allowed me to be able to break it, like I did.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes but why would you keep it?<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why would you keep it?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I woulda saved it for my sweetheart, if she'd wanted it. To use it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Aaaahhh.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But if I were there wouldn't you prefer the real deal?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Some things that metal just can't replace.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Yeah.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I heard that.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' You didn't use it did you?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No I did not.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Did you just throw all the ones you had away?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I only had that one. And there you go, I ri- there you go, I broke it apart.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you just, like, ''take'' it apart, I mean, it did...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' ...seem to come apart, like, screwed on...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I did not take it apart, that thing was glued at the seam. I had to put a lot of strength into breaking it at the middle there.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, but I think, um, showing your moves would be better.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Right.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Clyde would mess with you if you show him you can kick his ass.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey, Chris's a muthafuckin' ''gangsta''!<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Blap blap.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yes, Chris will fuck Clyde's shit up.<br /><br />
(awkward pause)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait, Chris, didn't you say you used a - didn't you say you used scissors to break the dildo?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I pretty much did have to so I could break that ''glued seam''.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, I thought you broke it with your hands.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well I- yeah well I would have but it was dang glued at the seam, so I clipped straight in with the scissors I had.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a pair of Super Shears from [[Cutco]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(feigning interest)'' Huh.<br /><br />
<br />
===19:50 Chris defends his Rule 34===<br />
<br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, let's talk about something else. Uh, Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whenever the announcement of the adult Sonichu page, when I looked at your gallery, very nice stuff, you know, I see a picture of what looks like you with a Sonichu, uh, medallion. Like, and, who's that one girl, exactly?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Who, [[Megan]]?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I thought it was, like, [[Crystal]], cause of the hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, it was - it was originally drawn to be Megan but I censored her eyes to, uh, port- to protect her identity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Mmmmmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''(laughing)'' That's stupid! (?) That's so silly.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I drew that after I found the ED page in November.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you say that?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In protest against it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thought you were going to get rid of it anyway.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I tore up the original drawing, I, in- into squares, and I put in in an envelope.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you upload it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you do that shit? Like, and...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I understand Rosechu, but, like y'know, why, like, something that's from real life. That's the problem (?)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's not necessarily from real life, it depends on you inter- it depends on your interpretation, I mean it's hardly- I mean, '''most women have long brown hair, and the eyes are censored''', so...<br/><br />
(laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''Most'' women?!?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I remember in that one video you were saying it was Megan.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because it broke, because it end up, because it the end it broke up my friend - broke up my friendship eve, my uh, friendship with Megan.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um, can I ask you a question? In the third picture, with [[Angelica Rosechu]], what is... what's happening, is... God... doing...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nope. She's masturbating. And she's enjoying it.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But she has no hands there. How's she doing it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' She's ''enjoying'' it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But she does... She does...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah but how's she doing it? She doesn't have her hands there.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> She does have her hands, she's... ''(stress sigh)'' She's... like most women would be able to do the same thing.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thing it's the angle, Julie. I think it's the angle you were looking at it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah plus uh, the picture wasn't, uh, very - wasn't as clear as, like, you know, I would have liked to have had it, uh, I mean, I had that file for a while, and it...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah some of those are kinda blurry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, some deg- some degraded.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ? a good question, have you drawn anything... of... have you drawn anything like that with me? Cause I would actually like to see, if you did. If so, could you, and let me see? I, uh, sorry, that's very rude to ask.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm sorry, let me answer this guy. Yeah, well, I made a retraction video later saying that I- I disowned that address.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ah, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just after that guy hacked into it and changed to it to suck. And as such.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hang on, I'm gonna take a look at that... My Youtube...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I like this song.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What song?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' The song that's playing in the background of, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what do you think of, uh, what do you think of that guy who advertises products, Billy Mays? What do you think of him?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... Billy... Oh! Yeah he's an ok guy, I watched him on Home Improvement.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Billy Mays?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, that was another guy on Home Improvement, Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No that was the same guy. That was the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Really?!? Let's look up. IMDB, go. ''(sound of typing)''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Believe me, it's the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, I really enjoyed your, um, adult, uh, section of the site.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... okey dokey, very good. Aaahh, trying to figure out how to update the link on this thing here. Oh, maybe under here. Oh there it is, thank God (?), update right now.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(singing)'' You spin me right round baby, right round...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (joining in) Like a record baby, right round round round<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's a classic, I can't help in man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There you are, updated. It's finally fixed.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Actually that was Richard Karn on Home Improvement, not Billy Mays.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well my mistake, I mean the guy had the beard and uhh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh yeah I can understand.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And the voice sounds- and the voice sounds the same...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah. They sound the same.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There's a matter of interpretation apparently I misinterpreted so I will admit that I was wrong.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah see we all make mistakes, don't be too hard on yourself.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unintelligible babble or singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you gotten any fan art submissions or notable? For the uh- webpage?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I got one today... It's like mostly a drawing of that uh that uh- of the fan herself.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -got in the snail mail today.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -Sunday.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hmmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What are you doing for this Valentine's day Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhm... I'm sorry, what was that question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What will you be doing this year on Valentine's day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm depends...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ahhh, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm.<br /><br />
Fan: Surely a man of such magnitude as yourself are going to be doing something important, aren't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Magnitude? Way to choose the words buddy.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Vocabulary talent.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, cause I don't have Julie over here yet.<br /><br />
(Reactions of OHs and AHs)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If she was here...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible) -play games.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Or we could just uh... talk.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Ehehehehe. Maybe... uh... why no redheads?<br /><br />
'''Other Woman:''' Yeah?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I was trying to think about that when the other guy asked that question. Uh... I was trying to think up that unh... mmmm... Uhhhh, redheads just don't be very- tract me so much.<br /><br />
Several: Uh, ah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's- it's- a- pi- a possibility that they're dyed.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmmmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But yeah y'know natural redheads enh, yeah, just don't really turn me on as much.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I see...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you thought about girls with um, highlights?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... (pause) aaahhhh... what turns me on hhh- (inhales) (pause) obviously the women.<br /><br />
'''Man:''' Gotta have the women. (?)<br /><br />
'''Guy''': What about piercings or tattoo?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, neither of those.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhhh-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris! How bout like non-orange hair, not like... no, never mind. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... oh... okay... hmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait Chris! How do you feel about blue hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Blue hair's okay, otherwise I wouldna- Otherwise I wouldn't've liked Sailor Mercury.<br /><br />
'''British? guy:''' That is true, she does have blue hair.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' She's a very fine character. There is no way to deny it.<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Blue hair is OFF DA HOOK!!!<br/><br />
<br />
===28:35 Chris impersonates various cartoon characters===<br />
<br />
'''British??? guy:''' Doesn't Marge Simpson have blue hair as well?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (in some kind of insane voice) Oh yeah! Marge Simpson has blue hair and it's as tall as the Empire State building!!!<br /><br />
(Some HMMs UHs and UMs follow)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yo Chris!! Can you do some impersonations for us?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Oh we'd love to hear that!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just did Marge Simpson.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah you're really talented.<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(Several people talking at once)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> -they're really good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Do another SimpsonsChris, how about Comic Book Guy?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Mmmmhmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I'm very indeed. Oh aren't we all promiscuous and whatnot. I like Batman and Robin, oh look! Stan Marsh has come into the thing again - I forget that guy's name, that guy who did the Marvel comics.<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Stan Lee. (Pause) Chris do your Donald Duck impression.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Everybody have fun (incoherent and scary quacking)<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris you should work for Disney.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's good Chris.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Have you ever considered being a voice actor?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Errrrrp... possibly, I'm not sure.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (incoherent, cut off by Chris)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent... another cartoon voice)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris, you're a Christian, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I was just wondering-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahm actu-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -do you just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm actually a Methodist church.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome, I was just wondering: Do you think AIDS was sent by god to kill the homos or do you think that it's just an accident or something man-made?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thou- the thought never occurred to me... thought never occurred to me.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' can you do an impression of Arnold Schwarzenegger?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hold- the question...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Let Chris answer the question.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thought- the thought never occurred to me about what you just said about the AIDS there mmmm... but y'know, it's a possibility and I will not agree nor disagree with it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I was just wondering I mean, I've had that discussion with some of my Christian friends. I just wanted to get your opinion, thank you.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmhhh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think (clears throat) I think Omicron has a point and you did tell me you went to a methodist church didn't you? So that's-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well th- well my Methodist church is uh more loose on- is not as strict on uh- on uh sex.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris I don't know- I don't know that much about religion in the States but I don't think there is a looser Meth- Methodist church. God makes the rules Omicron says.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, hmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well, you know personally I think that the government made AIDS to kill off all the brothers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whoa, whoa... That's what the blacks always say.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. (pause) I'm going to agree, that sounds like something that uh... well, a black guy would say.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So your church is kinda of uh- they let you do- their kinda loose on the whole moral restrictions?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... (pause) uhhh... that's... what's the question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Your church they- you said they're kind of more uh- y'know they're less strict on the whole moral thing, like, as far as sexuality goes? Right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -ah basically.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But y'know, uhh, I thought you're supposed to listen to the Bible or whatever not, y'know, not necessarily- no, never mind.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (interrupts)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, there's also a uh, there's also a- think about this uh, if you uh- if you- if you were a think uh- you have to find for yourself a good meaning behind uh- good meaning behind watching pornography to uh- like teach how it- how to do this and that when you actually get around to doing it...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's all ???<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's all's considered education for yourself.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' How is that realistic at all?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, it's uh- not a really good thing to learn from, trust me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It can be done before marriage as well as long as me and my sweetheart really love each other very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But not in Christianity.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But all I'm saying is y'know, porn is completely, completely unre- unrealistic I mean you can't really learn anything from it.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It gives- it gives you enough ideas.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unclear)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (incoherent) porn.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' When you actually have sex, it's nothing like porn.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe not like you, you not gonna do it-<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' You can't do it immediately- immediately anal sex cause most women are not very happy with anal sex and also...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay, shut up<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' -and also weird-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Shut up.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Yes.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And... that wasn't cool, like...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That was uncalled for...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, like, suthin' a BLACK MAN would say...<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' That's racist man...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, somebody said it on here first before I did.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Does that make it ok?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, I think he's trying to make it clear that- I dunno.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I typically agree with that guy.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So nothing g- it doesn't make it ok.<br /><br />
(incoherent)<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling) I wi- I'm sorry, I take it back.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(unclear)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Guys can we get back to Sonichu, Please?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah this is getting ridiculous.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unclear) -Sonichu actually.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Anyway, my question is that: why does Sonichu not wear clothes while Rosechu and the other Rosechus do wear clothes? And underwear?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Aaaaaaaaaamp... It's like uh- it's basically a cartoon and it doesn't really matter, it's like... mm... think about this: Most cartoon characters wear at least one article of clothing. At least one article. And uh- it's like Yogi Bear who just wears a necktie and a hat.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 35.14)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Other Guy:''' I think it would be cool if all the Sonichus and Rosechus got together and they and- they all formed a big team and they had special uniforms or something, kinda like the X-men.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Or Power Rangers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh yeah, I don't do- I don't do well- I'm not in- no uniforms. It's a uniform and other Sonichus and Rosechus.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'm just wondering if you'd do another impression: What does Blachu sound like? Uh, Black Sonichu? Or Blake?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eeeeuuunh... Eh... ahhhh...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Can you imitate it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... I'm not sure... uhhhhm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Like does he sound black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Possibly, but I'm not certain. I'm not leaning towards it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I'd like to hear it, but if you don't want...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just never- I just never really thought about that. I'd say that he possibly sounds similar to uh, y'know Shadow the hedgehog. But he could possibly sound, black. He could. Don't quote me on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' All right, I was just wondering if you'd do his voice but...<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Hey why does the BAD guy gotta be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never said the bad guy "has to" be black. (pause) I mean, look at the- the range of villanies, I mean there's black and whites and uh... male females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I noticed that uh- Silvana's also... black lookin'.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just decided to color her black because she was born- she came from outer space from a black egg, which was the- which came out of the rainbow.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah, I was also wonderin' about that like-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I- I- I-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' If Silvana came out of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes it's-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Why would she be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' I mean like black ain't part of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like the black sheep of the family. Y'know you put all the colors together and it does become black.<br /><br />
(unintelligible reactions)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -like a brownish-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) is a (unintelligible) color.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Maybe it's because she's from space and there's not a lot of light in space and it's dark or something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah that- a uh yeah- that's one of the-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hmmm.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhm, did you look at the link of my friend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, ummmm...<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Yeah, since you love blue hair.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh- no I haven't looked at it and I don't wanna make Julie feel jealous if I did- if I went and did.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Julie would mind.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhhh...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You look at pornography don't you?<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' (mumble)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, that- that was two syllables "Rose-chu". You don't- don't add- don't say the "e" it's just "Rosechu".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah you went over this last chat.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>(I don't know, it sounds like "narrator")<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sounds like he says "narrator" again)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh... I was just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, well, obviously the uh- the narrator who did those audio books was incorrect. Specially since I never gave that person the approval to do the audiobooks.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think it's just a fan project and I think he-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' and I think he might have one of the West coast dialects. I know that the South they say y'all but over here-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well obviously he lied-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -different. I'd be proud if they made one of my projects into an audiobook though. That means that there are a lot of fans out there that really like it.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Ay.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' They're not selling to try and make any money off it. They're not trying to rip you off. They always made sure- they always narrate the first page by saying "Christian Weston Chandler" so they're not trying to cheat you or anything.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' The people know you're making it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I- I hear that. I just, apparently they misin- misinterpreted the (audio breaks up) name Rosechu. Or mispronounced it. Misinterpreted, mispronounce- fairly the same thing in that situation... possibly. To answer that question... possibly.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uh, Vivian said that the audiobooks made Sonichu way popular that- than you could ever ever do on your own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I will not disagree with the statement. And I appreciate her help.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris. Would you be offended if a fan wrote a fanfiction about Sonichu?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Faaanfiction... if it's- if it's not demeaning or makes them look stupid. Then it's fine- it's fine. (pause) Like I did mind when, shoot, what's his name? That guy... uhhhh... that guy that the uhhhh... did the animations, on his computer.<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' You did mind or you didn't?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Animations???<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think I know what he's talking about. Are you talking about the um...<br /><br />
<br />
(background noise begins)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' Well the original play was a Greek play. Where they're all y'know... Greeks... and crazy stuff happens and they're all runnin' around in togas. So if you ever wanna see the movie "A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum" it was a classic and it had some real classic people from the 50s and 60s in it. Kinda like "It's a MAD MAD MAD MAD World". Sort of a classic old school movie from funny old school world. First color movie type thing. But that'll be a high school play. You'll wanna see that. You might actually enjoy it. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
(inaudible response)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' You never know that might be fun to do. Well I guess that wouldn't work on the weekend then... you gotta...<br /><br />
<br />
'''(FOR THOSE OF YOU WONDERING WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON, IT APPEARS THAT THERE WAS SOME TECHNICAL PROBLEM THAT CAUSED ANOTHER MUMBLE CHANNEL TO BE RECORDED WHILE THE CONVERSATION WITH CHRIS BECAME BARELY AUDIBLE BACKGROUND NOISE. INSTEAD ALL THAT CAN BE HEARD IS SOME BUTTFACE YAMMERING ABOUT FILMS AND TELEVISION SHOWS. I'M NOT GOING TO KEEP TRANSCRIBING IT. CHRIS IS STILL TALKING AND ANSWERING QUESTIONS, BUT NOTHING CAN BE UNDERSTOOD OVER THESE GUYS.)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''(AT 42.56 THE AUDIO SUDDENLY RESUMES NORMALLY)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Unknown person:''' Uh you-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I uh- noticed he's another BLACK villain.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah in real life he was black. Without meaning any offense to the uh- black guy in general, cause you've noticed, among the Jerkops there's uh- we got black's and white's, males and females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(several people jump in at once)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) -you've never drawn a female officer before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well y'know uhhh... uhhh, comic book number 7, near the end. Near the end of the time travel episode. Uhh, I have no opinion about what Obama's doing cause I don't watch the news.<br /><br />
Accented woman: But you voted for him, didn't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes I voted for him because I saw myself in him when I com- when I saw both the documentaries and downloaded them for the Playstation Network between Obama and McCain. I mean voted for a person I saw more of myself of-<br /><br />
Accented woman: You usually vote for someone based on their political leanings, not how you view them. As I were Republican, I voted for John McCain. Not because I liked him but because I- he had the same political views as me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basi- basically I'm a moderate.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh, I see. Um, I was wondering. I was reading opinions: do you agree with his financial bailouts?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm, I don't even know what it is. So I can't disagree or agree.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Well, to make it short um, it's about uh- the government- President Obama is planning to uh- a new one- (cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You got cut off there.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uhh, ok, we lost him.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yo, Chris, uh, do you, you didn't just vote for Obama cause he was black, did you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I did not vote for him because he was black. I voted for him cause I saw myse- because I saw myself in him. In like, similar lifestyles. And I saw that he was a good man, I mean after all, com- I saw- I saw I watched both of the A&E documentaries, before I can- before I knew who I would vote for.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 45.29)'''<br /><br />
<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris:, Chris what did you see in him that you say in your self?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Like for one thing we were like outcasts, at least one point in our lives.<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Wait, wait hold up earlier you said that you thought he would probably paint the white house black.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh oh that was my father’s joke he said that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Is your father a racist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but you see I drew that for him before I saw the documentaries so respectfully withdrew that comic page.<br /><br />
'''???:''' does your father hate black people.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Not necessarily but it’s just how my father just how my father that does not reflect in any way that’s how he felt (annoying ass noise in the background)<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Man that racist.<br /><br />
'''??? :''' Hey Chris I so the ahh saw the Sonichu and Rosechu love sack that you put up and I thought if was pretty cool for (you adult friends?) I just had a question though: do you have any plans in the comic to have romance between you and one of the hedgehogs I mean-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Yelling) No no no<br /><br />
'''???:''' -we would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' I mean is was just wondering because there are fans how would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Now- now that you answered the his question my kind of relates to his what are your thoughts on inter racial breeding and marriages?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would not agree of disagree with them but in my personal preference I would fell- I would feel more comfortable in having a full relationship with a white woman but I am willing- am still willing to be friends and acquaintances and give and have respect for the black women as well.<br /><br />
'''???:''' What about Asians like Japanese?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I’m ok with them as well (yelling) a once.<br /><br />
'''???:''' So would you get married with a Japanese woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hhhmmmm I would have, yes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> but I’m giving Julie to opportunity here.<br /><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: Julie’s a lucky woman.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris, I was just wondering, is Silvana gonna become one of the good guys, like- like Black Sonichu did before?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There’s a possibility but I have not given that a co- I have not confirmed that yet.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Uh, is she gonna lose the male sexual parts and become a full-fledged woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhhmmm possibly but I haven’t given that- I haven't given that thought either.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Also um I was reading (?Phillip’s?) question, Chris what did you want to be when you were little?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don’t remember, I do not remember. I’m just making it as I go basically.<br /><br />
'''???:''' is there ever gonna be like uh, an end to your sonichu series like a finale?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hmmmm I don’t know, probably would not.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Oh so it keeps going and going?<br /><br />
???: You ever consider making comic about the history of CWCville?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhmmmm an episode dedicated towards that possibility.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris are you going to keep the name changes that you made or are you going back to the original names?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahhh ya I’m keeping the name changes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' But you know umm Nintendo was umm, y'know, they sent you a letter you never really talk about it further.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but at least- at least- the hel- they use to benefit me for the fact that uh allowed me to fix noting in that sense so I couldn’t be sued by such people in that sense.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 50 min)'''<br /><br />
<br />
(scattered reactions)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So the name changes were good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So uh, Chris I was wondering if uh Mary- Mary Lee Walsh Or I guess the new name: Ryam Sla- I don't know-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Sla-weel.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Slaweel, thank you. Uhm, if she were to use her magic to curse Rosechu with a penis, would Soni- what- wou- would that test the relationship between Sonichu and her? While they were fighting the battle to have it removed, I'm just curious.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... Firstly uh, she does not- she does not have the power ch- to do that.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I just thought you know, remember you did the story about 4-cent-garbage and drawing all the- the picture and-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah you what, that's one- that's one thing: drawing them, but not actually putting them on the character.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Cause I think that would be like an epic story though, like to actually have a quest-<br /><br />
Fan: I'll second that.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -to go to have that penis removed from Rosechu. I mean it's a test of romance between her and Sonichu.<br /><br />
(muttering)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And when that prevails and the penis is removed and everybody- everybody lives happily ever after. Y'know that would be awesome.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnnnnnh, I dunno I have to- I dunno I have to think about that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It is a really good idea. I like it.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I do too.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah, that's good.<br /><br />
Other fan: It could show just how much Rosechu means to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I'll- I'll consider it but I'm not making any promises.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' We understand.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(several talking at once)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -decided on that subject?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm working on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' If you actually decide to go forward with that story? Do you think maybe- maybe you could give her a talking penis?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!!!<br /><br />
(laughter from various people)<br /><br />
(unintelligible responses)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ok, I think- I think we've talked enough about that one guys.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I have a question that doesn't involve penises.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Anyway, my question is since we've been hearing lot of vicious lies and slander about this, could you confirm exactly why you've been fired from your job at Wendy's Chris? Cause we've been hearing all sorts of- of crazy things and we wanna know the truth.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmmmmmm... well, firstly, what have you heard?<br /><br />
'''Other guy:'''Well we heard that uh you... we've heard so many things like you helped a small child and you did a Donald Duck impersonation and you scared the child.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... also that- also that is correct but I did not scare the child. The child was tired, I was only trying ta- I was only trying to make the child feel better. That's a little amusement. But I did not make the child cry, the child was already- was just tired.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' So you didn't help them cut their food and... yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I did help them- help them get their food to- by giving them uhh, by giving them bags and a top for their baked potato boat.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris, when will um, the pictures of Zapina, appear on the um, 18 plus page?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that was a deleted scene! That was a deleted scene.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Why was it deleted?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basically, hhh... y'c- y'cant' really have it if you don't have Rosechu working to take the- working to take the pictures of herself up in the bathroom. Cause like can't have one without the other.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaahhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I don't know if this is a good question but there's something I wonder about that- we kind of have this DVD you made and... y'know, we never unfortunately got... but I'm curious um... do you ever plan to release it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I'd pay money for that, I think everyone else here would probably pay money for it too.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Indeed.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (breaking up) I wanna ask a question.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I hear it's also on YouTube.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris do you know that you've influenced the rap/hip hop community?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmh... uh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I just wanted to mention that because I saw some YouTube videos and it- and- and from some underground hip hop artists such as Immortal Technique and they've sampled some of your voice audio complaining about your struggles with uhm... with the school board, with the security guards and they were- they felt so empowered that they actually took those words and mad'em into a very powerful rap song. How does that- how is your reaction to that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhhhh... basically I have not watched those videos so... I don't have an opinion.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I will provide you a link to that, hold on a moment.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh that's ok, actually I uh, did sample one. The one where they basically played the parody from "Can't touch this".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, no, trust me it's waaay more serious than that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I still haven't heard of- heard of what you're talking about.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Nevermind.<br /><br />
(rustling and moving noises)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do an impression of MC Hammer?<br /><br />
(more clicking and rustling)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Can't touch this do do do doo do dooo Can't touch this! Do do do dooo do do do... can't touch this.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' That was- heheheh.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Awesome.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you- can you do Dr. Nick Riviera from the Simpsons?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> HIIII EVERYBODY!<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hello Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hi Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hi Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that should say Dr. Nick cause that's who I'm imitatin'.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''???:''' That uh-<br /><br />
'''???:''' HELLOOO EV'RYBODY!!!!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well that-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hi Dr. Nick!<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Thank you, I love the Simpsons.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do... Peter from Family Guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhenhenhenh... Hey Lois! Look at me! I'm just (unclear) you nose, and I'm eatin' your nose.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh that's dead on.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Oh would you- Omicron's been interested in tis- would you actually make a documentary like- like your other DVD but make your daily life?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... I'm... yeah I might but uh... I'm not su- I'm not sure bout it at the moment.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaaaaaaanh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris can you do Mario? You know from Super Mario?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hay paisano! How you doin' mistah hedgehog!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's very good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then Sonic- then Sonic would say "what?!?"<br /><br />
(giggling)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris do you have any plans to make a video of yourself taking a dump on a Hexbox?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No! That's gross.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Yeah that was pretty sick right there.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Let's ban him.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's bad enough I cut in half with an axe.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> and one of the elevator jokes...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Oh we remember that, that was a classic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And I earned a trophy for that.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmm...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Yeah, I remember that, it was destroying a Hexbox by cutting it in half if I remember...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' If I were to draw nude Zapina fanart, uhm, would you put them on the site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... uhh, your- you uh- free to draw them at your- at your own- own preference, but I will not be- I will not put it on the website because- cause- because I will not want to break any laws of having underage portrayals- portrayals of underage nudity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Isn't Dot a child?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry... what?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dot, from Animaniacs.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' So-uh- uhm- I think I looked up somewhere that um, drawings do not count, they're just lines on paper not like real pictures that are horrible.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah I believe-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Draw-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (cut off)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Those illustrations do not count as child pornography. Because with drawing it's art- it's artistic merit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Welll... I dunno, I guess it depends I have to- but- y'know you could do the drawing and I'll think- I'll consider it.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, would it be possible to get any pictures of Sonichu having anal sex with Rosechu?<br /><br />
(pause... thumps and feedback)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm considering that but...<br /><br />
'''Accented woman''' Who keeps letting this person in? You are very offensive.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -and and, if you draw those, do you think that Rosechu would actually clean Sonichu's penis off with her mouth (laugh) w-when they're done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nah, no, I don't think so, I think- I think- I think it would be unh- yeah w-wash it off with a washcloth.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Do you think then, at that point then they would sell the washcloth on eBay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!<br /><br />
(people talking over each other)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, no, no more potty humor, all right?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah alright, okay<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Unrelated to party humor, I want to ask that in your Springbreak uhh Issue of Sonichu you had an introduction of a, of new character, the [[Yawning Squirtle|squirtle]] and I wanna ask<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:''' (interrupting)</span> No, that's, no, no, no, that's not just a character, I was, I was not introducing a new character, I was just doing like a poster thing for a bubble speak under one, I thought I just draw some water type pokemon un-in there<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I understand but the thing is there is huge cult following for that character and I strongly suggest that you should capalize on that and, and make him to a main character<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eh... No, I don't think so<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's just sleeping Squirtle work- waking up!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, people just thought he was really cute and yawning Squirtle, I don't know, I heard someone say, man wouldn't it be great if he would be that [[Autistic|dopey]] sidekick that he'd come and they'd be like, like, he'd come in and say something silly after someone did something and they would be like "Squirtle"!<br /><br />
People laughing and talking over each other<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um...<br /><br />
???: Yo, it makes you *unintelligible* (Chris and someone talk over another)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yes Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I'm asking you about... Hm... Never mind, I lost my train of thought. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's okay. These guys made me lose a train of thought as well. Doesn't multiple inputs.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yes, kinda lotta control here. I might- I may have to... never mind<br /><br />
Silence<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I never lose my train of thought because I have a GPS tracking system on it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, that was a good joke. (chuckle)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, could you tell us a joke right now. Just any joke.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay, here is a fuck- here is a funny- here is a funny mind scream. Funny rhyme scheme... not to be taken literally:<br /><br />
On your Game Boy Advance SP<br /><br />
create 'yer MII<br /><br />
den play it on WII<br /><br />
with your PSP<br /><br />
hooked to your PS3<br /><br />
cause it's fun<br /><br />
see?<br /><br />
And never ff, and never play a [[Hex Box]] 360<br /><br />
Because it's stupid and you're not a dummy (in childlike voice)<br /><br />
Mock laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That is really good.<br />
'''Fan''': Chris is that something you made up?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I made that up.<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Chris, Chris, can I write that down and tribute to quote you that? Oh man, that's good<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) So you mean to type it up and you quote me on the rhyme scheme?<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Yeah, I'd like that. I've been thinking about making a quote book like a mini Chris quote book like something you could open and have a cool line to say when you're on a party and you're like right things.<br /><br />
People talking over Chris and Alucard<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, well I'm typing it up for Alucard, so...<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Thank you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, can we hear one more?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay well here, okay um, okay here is an [[Christian's sex joke|adult joke]] I once come up with a long time ago.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': This is going to be good!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright- Alright there's this married couple, Bob and Jane, and they've been- they were looking forward to having children. So, one night, Bob comes home from work, and uh Jane says, "Hi, you had a good day, dear?" And he sa- and she sa-- he says, "Nah, it's been a long day, darling" And she said, "Well, it's okay, why don't we go upstairs, and we'll have some Breakfast." And he says, "Breakfast, at Nine p.m.?" And she says, "Sure, you bring the MILK, and I'll get an EGG."<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yo, I heard that before, man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then later, they had a boy and a girl, Junior Bacon and Orange Juice. All Part of a Balanced Breakfast.<br /><br />
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif]]<br /><br />
Perplexed silence<br />
<br />
'''Fan''': Hey, Chris, how do you solve a Mexican tank?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Stand in front of it?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': No, man, shoot the guys pushing at it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fans''': Oh that's a good one.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' I got one.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get a bunch of [[Niggos|blacks]] in a car?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Throw some chicken in.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get them out of the car?<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Job application.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What do you call a beach of black people buried up to their necks?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Afro-turf.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I came up with one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what's the difference between a black man and a pizza?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': A pizza can feed a family of four.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': How do you stop black people from jumping on a bed?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, enough racist jokes.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Put velcro on the ceiling.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enough, enough black jokes.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, uh Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Sorry<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I showed by friend that over 18 site, and he said, that he um, he um, you know he, he masturbated to it. Does that make you feel (interrupted)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's good, that's basically the reaction I would be going for. Among the male ca... among the male population, being attracted to the women.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But those are your drawings, it's like, I think he's gay now. I mean, you're a guy and you drew those.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm drawing, I'm drawing female characters.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yah, but it's drawn by you and you're, like, I don't know. It's kind of awkward for me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris, I actually need to thank you, the pictures on that site, it looked like the camera was inside Sonichu's penis when Rosechu was giving him a blowjob. That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. I've always wanted to have a camera in my penis so that I could see that if I ever got a blowjob, that would be awesome, I just wanted to say thank you very much for that perspective. It's the first time I've ever seen it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': There's a question here on the site, oh sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, well I see it... no I don't basically masturbate to my own drawings.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But you're okay if other people do, right? Even guys?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You're okay if other people, you know, masturbate to your drawings? Even if they're guys, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If the guys are masturbating to the female drawings, then yes, that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I just thought it was kind of awkward, but maybe I'm seeing it a different way.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I doubt that, uh, having a whole bunch of drawings of naked female characters can be misinterpreted as something else.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Can I to ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': One time, a friend and I were looking at porn together, and we masturbated together, but the porn was straight, ordinary porn. Is this gay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I'm sorry, where you looking at naked women?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Yes, but we were in the same room, masturbating.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, if you both were thinking about the naked women you were looking at, then I would definitely say you both are straight, cuss you're not thinking about each other, you're thinking about the women.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Right. <br /><br />
'''Fan''': Would you do that with someone?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': I'm relieved.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Man, nigger you gay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Shut up. Would you do that with someone? Like a guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Nah, I'm straight dog.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I'd, yeah I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Omnicron has a question on here, on the side here.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You see it, or?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. That's not straight.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what about the earlier question.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, the one before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, which one before? Oh, you mean...<br /><br />
(All talk at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, what do you think about-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wait, wait let him answer.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Let him answer that one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was gonna rephrase it but okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'd say it would depend on your interpretation, what is adultery to you?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But, you know, isn't the Bible only supposed to be interpreted, it's the word of God, you're not really supposed to interpret it any other way.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': It is what it is.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's in English.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh, I have no comment.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, that's what my, uh, you know I was talking about my mom saw those drawings. I mean, not the drawings, the posters, the playboy posters and that's basically what she got bad about. She said I was committing adultery.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah okay, if you don't want to talk about it, fine.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, hmmm, I think you shou, I think you should, uh, when you, I think I can see where this could be interpreted one way or another, it depends on how you look at the woman. I mean, alright, you're looking at the, uh woman, you might imagine her naked, but, I mean, you would respe- I mean, you would, you would still respect, I mean, if you were still respecting that woman, you would appreciate her more for like who she was aside or in addition to the nudity, then that's not as bad as just, as just only doing it for the appearance.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's why, uh, that's why the playboy magazines, they give you the introductions of the women. It's like letting you know who they are (unintelligible).<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh but, yeah, but there weren't any, uh, descriptions under the, yeah never mind.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Thank you for the clarification Chris.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris, do you love America?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm patriotic.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's good. I was wondering if you could sing the national anthem for us?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [[Wikipedia:My Country, 'Tis of Thee| My country tis' of thee. Sweet land of liberty. Of thee, of thee I sing.]] I don't remember the rest.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Lands where my fathers died.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Land of the pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
(Fans all start singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Stop it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey I'll, I'll tell y'all a funny joke that's kind of patriotic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, you got this, you got this funny Mexican- you got this funny Mexican guy, and he just, he just come back home to Meh-he-co after an American visit. He's like (high pitched voice) Oh the people there are so very friendly. I mean, I go to the basketball game. I sit in the back row. I sit in the back row. And then, and then, and then all of a su- and then all of the sudden right before the game started, everyone turned around, put their hands on their chests, and they say, "Oh say can you seeeeee"!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I thought you said no racist jokes?<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': Yeah man, that ain't cool!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was a name, it was a name joke.<br /><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''':...Spanish language<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm kind of offended by that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': That's racist dog. That ain't cool.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': You laugh you support terrorism.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ¿Qué?<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What'd you say?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What the hell? Who said that?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Forget it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I said, you laugh, you support terrorism.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, he's gone.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Awful Mr. T impression) I pity the fool, who try and misinterpret things, and twist them around, and then jam new words into my mouth.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You do a good Mr. T<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah you do.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) no jibber jabber.<br /><br />
(Fans laugh)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, did you watch the A-team back in the day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No but, no but, basica- but I have seen Mr. T. And then I also, I also saw when he guest, when he quest starred in an episode of Alvin and the Chipmunks.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I saw that episode, he helped uh Theodore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Theodore was getting picked on, yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, you posted a link here.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well at my [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|Methodist church]], uh, sex before marriage is okay as long as, uh, she and I, we love each other very much and truly.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But that's what they tell you, I'm talking about the word of God.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *Sigh* Okay, I'm getting tired, okay, I'm getting tired here, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, but...<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, sorry, no more of that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, you're right. Please stay Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay. Alright, I'll stay a little while longer.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, if anyone does, if anyone asks anything that makes him feel uncomfortable, I'm gonna kick you out of the room.<br /><br />
(Everyone speaks)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Chris, could you give me some advice?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I have a Japanese friend, he's, he's actually 26 and he's never had a girlfriend and we asked him some questions, just joking around one day. And we asked him if his, when he gets married, if his wife wanted to sleep with another man, would he be okay with it, and he actually said yes, as long as she wasn't being forced. Now that kind of bothered us, because us Americans, right, we think that marriage, and you know you're with somebody, they should be faithful, but he doesn't seem to think so, so I wanted to see if you had any advice maybe on what we could do to try and convince him that his viewpoint is wrong.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, hmm, it's not necessarily that the viewpoint is wrong. See, the thing is, what, to, to quote, to make it accepta- to make it like as if you're actually cheating on somebody, cheating on your spouse in the marriage, it's like not telling them, not telling him, not telling him or her about it beforehand, but it's like, you know, you, it's like you tell them beforehand and you get their approval, it's, it's okay, even if they don't want to be part of it. But not telling them, that's definitely like uh, cheating on them.<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that's another thing I would have to think about, cause, got a bit of a, couple of items of destruction that need to be repaired<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I just got, I just talked to that one friend I was talking about who, uh, saw your website, the 18 one, and it turns out he's, he's gay, he's actually gay and he fapped to, uh I mean he masturbated to, uh, Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hahaha, your friend's a fag.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': And I think he's...<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out for 15 seconds)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ...about that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I think in case you would definitely want to let him know that you are straight and you don't want that kind of relationship, and maybe, and you know<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I tell him just to get the hell away from your site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm not saying that, but like, uh, you know, you don't want that kind, you don't, I mean that's, that's basically confirmed on that note. So, uh, you want, you still wanna be friends but you don't, but you're not into that kind of thing.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I mean, he was looking at your site, like, the 18 site and he was in like, um-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Over 18.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': The over 18 site you made. The loveshack. I thought he was just like, you know, masturbating to Rosechu, but it turns out he was attracted to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *sigh* Uhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, I don't think I'll be friends with this guy anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, yeah, then tell him, yeah, to get the hell out of your house and stay away if you don't want to be friends anymore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Seems like you know too many gay friends mister.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh shut up.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris, you know how-<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's not my fault. <br /><br />
'''Another fan''': You know how cologne or perfume, you know, women wear that to try and attract men? Do you think that farts attract gay guys to each other?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Now that's stupid! Not only is that stupid, but it's gross.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Here, I'm gonna take that question and I'm gonna, I'm gonna take that question and spin that into something that's less weird. What would you say the best cologne or whatever a guy could wear to get a girl's attention?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I recommend [[Axe|Axe]] body spray.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh yeah? I think I tried that one time.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': That actually does it for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What scent do you use?<br /><br />
(All speak)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Don't you use ass body spray?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Mmm, love it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Does the Axe effect, does it really exist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Does Axe exist?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, the Axe effect. You know, they say in the commercials spray it and girls will come to you.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) and it works for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Has it worked for you Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, well, yeah, I, yeah I haven't got that working for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I think it's a scam personally.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I mean... I mean, Old Spice is pretty good. I had, I had like a couple of girls go up to me asking me for dates with Old Spice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I actually wore that Orion sent, uhh, still smelling it. So it will work Chris, you just gotta give it time.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Using the Axe.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Cameron but, isn't Axe spray for men?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': No no no no no no no, see, see I said a boyfriend, a boyfriend that I met.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, okay.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah. *laughs*<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That makes sense.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, silly, silly. I have a question for you Chris, what celebrities have you met?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Well what I'm saying is the Axe effect doesn't work. Okay, sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't actually met other celebrities in person, my real life, unless you count a local radio DJ.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I've met the DJ of my radio station 95.1 and [[Excel Saga|Monica Rial]], and meeting Monica Rial was just a treat.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ahhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was, it was good.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, she's pretty.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Maybe you should go to her and, um, maybe she could be like a contact for voice acting. I mean, you do pretty good imitations.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Do Homer Simpson!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Homer Simpson impression) Oh, look at me! I'm a stupid old person, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp, D'OH!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That was awesome<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Who else can you do Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What other imitations can you do?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, a lot. It depends on if you name it, I might recall, if you name the person or character I'll, if I can recall my memory than I will imitate that person.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Can you try Bender from Futurama?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I reckon I can do a pretty good Bender! I can twist off my arm and, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, um, since my girlfr-(clears throat)-sorry. Since my girlfriend broke up with me, I was just wondering if you could give me any tips to like, pick up y'know, another girlfriend?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) Valentine's Day is coming.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah. It's gonna be lonely without her, y'know.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah I know.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Can you help?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) No I do not know what tha- neither of them sound like in voices so I can't imitate them. (sigh) As for- as for dating advice uh, if you're- when you're going out to meet a woman, and this is like advice that's like it could've been taken from my, taken from my own advice I gave in the, the one in the video I did when I just turned 25. But it was definitely, it was given, but it was offered in this book written by a nine-year-old.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> When you're going to uh find yourself a woman, you just try to stay calm. And uh be polite, friendly. Don't uh let your nerves get the best of ya.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What should I say, what should I say here, y'know, to the girl?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Start with "hello" and "how are you".<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I ask her, should I like do a pick-up line? Do those work?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Um, sometimes. But I wouldn't, I wouldn't exactly count on it in a desperate situation. But I mean like uh, talk about yourself a little bit saying like, "Ooh did you read in the paper today about this article that really caught my eye?"<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was thinking about standing by the wall with a sign. Saying that I need a girlfriend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, don't- don't do that. That makes you look retarded.<br /><br />
(Laughter)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What about wearing a sticker that says you're single. Have you ever tried that? Do you think that would work?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what was that? A stick-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wearing like a uh, a sticker that says "I'm single".<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Wait a second I'm not done yet.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Oh I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I got that idea from your comic. I mean I thought it was a-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. I later learned that that, I already learned from my mother that made me look retarded. (Female fan laughs) To other people, so...<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Ohh. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So I stop- So I stopped- So I stopped doing that a long time ago and, I don't know (what payed attention?)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mm. Basically I'm running from others that have offered such advice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh yeah like John Tesh I remember that in your news dash.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. And also it's like uh there's an expression in my elementary somewhere uh, those who can't teach.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Um, I remember (unintelligible). Um, I was um, looking at um (something), how do you feel about Obama swearing in his book? Even read it out loud in the audiobook version.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hm. (rustling and typing in the background) Hm. Ah, yeah I heard of that, didn't care much, didn't uh give much thought into it so... Uh swearing yeah don't care much for it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': So Chris I was just wondering uh, like can you hear me?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I can hear you.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Uhh. Does wearing that medallion, does that attract females? I was thinking about making my own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) You could do what you want, to try and make yourself stand out. Um... But it depends on if you, it depends on other peoples' point of uh you I guess at this point, um... You might want to get a second opinion. I mean it's not like I can see you over da Mumble and uh say what makes you look okay and what makes you look NOT okay. Yeah, g- get a second opinion from somebody else in person.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What about you, do you think that medallion makes you look, y'know, more attractive to girls?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhmmm. Yeah. Yeah I don't know. I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah I think it looks pretty cool on you. So that's, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well you could try it, see if you could try and see if it works for ya.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Speaking, speaking of the medallion, I noticed you wear it on the outside. Have you ever done any replacing the chain on it to something a little more comfortable?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh no. It's fine. It's fine. I mean I'd say that this uh the necklace chain with the like a pair- like a pair of- like a pair of keyrings with a belt buckle on them.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm. Alright.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris in hentai, the uh guys- like the girls usually say no but the, the guy touches her a bit and she gets into it. I was just wondering if you think that really works, have you ever tried that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh. I'm sorry, could you repeat that?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': I said in hentai, y'know the Japanese um, kinda pornography-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Yeah-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': -usually, the, the girl kind of says no but then the guy starts touching her boobs or something and she gets real excited and gets into it. I was just wondering if you think that really works. Can you just make a girl excited and into you just like t hat?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhh... Yeah I don't think so. I me- I mean in most of the time I'm sure you would probably just, the girl would probably just turn around and slap you right in the face or kick you in the groin.<br /><br />
(Various pained groans)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, you were saying it's educational. I think I saw that in a porn too.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Uh. Also (unintelligible) asked "How far have you gotten with a girl"?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I've never even been on a first date in my lifetime.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ohhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> At this point.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris?<br /><br />
(Fans talk over each other)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I was suggesting uh Chris, I have family in Bristow, Virginia. I've been out there a lot. And you know, they're- I mean, people that I've seen in Virginia don't really like anime and things that much. Have you ever considered maybe trying to meet a girl in the west coast? Because a lot of people, especially universities are into anime culture. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) Yeah but I'm no- I'm not planning on traveling outside of my state. Plus I would prefer to keep it local.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah.<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
(Everyone talks over each other)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but to see the world means to have to have the money to actually go see the world.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Well You just have to save up a little bit.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah. I mean you know, trains are good.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': (strange incognizable noise)<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Gas is cheap now.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': You can meet so many people just going on a road trip or just you know, taking the bus or something I mean it's not too expensive, it's cheaper than a plane- (Chris talks over him)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Yeah, I hear you on that. But I just like, you know, if I want to go on a road trip I'd uh, I would not like to go it alone. I'd like to have my sweetheart by my side.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Mmm.<br><br />
'''Fan''': The point is you could always get a job. That's what I did once a-(cut off)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh.<br><br />
(Fans talk over each other)<br><br />
'''Other fan''': -and I wanted to meet a girl? I got this t-shirt that says "ask me about my large and attractive penis" and I wear that to the mall and it works every time.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Are you kidding, really?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yes. (cut off)<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Well that's interesting. (laughs) I have to meet you some time. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah boy. Uhh, alright, gentleman's clubs um...<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what was that noise just now?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Noise?<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I heard like a (snorts) noise.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Yeah, that was probably me be- because I was like objecting to the uh, when he was describing what it said on his t-shirt.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah that wasn't cool. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': You guys have no taste. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah-<br><br />
'''Guy''': Disgusting!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I know.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay um. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>But it just uh, just it m- just ma- I mean the way I see it, see somebody else wearing that it makes, it uh, it makes- it s- it would appear that guy is only looking for sex and women would be turned by sh- sh- sex right away at that point.<br><br />
'''Guy''': Yeah it kinda sums up (cut off)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Um, so...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um... (Chris and Fan talk over each other) Yeah let me answer this guy's question. Yeah I don't know much about gentleman's clubs so I can't really answer that question. A, and uh... <br><br />
'''Fan''': What about you though, like when you're looking for a girl, does like sex really matter? Like, to attractiveness?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, er, yeah. Eventually the se- yeah. Attractiveness does matter in one point of view but uh, but if you think about it it's like you want to get to know the person, the woman inside as well. Um, so, (I'd rather be in it?) so like uh, we were very close to each other emotionally and like friends, then the sex. Like uh, how Panda and I were very... close.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Hmm.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': What happened to Panda?<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah what happened to her?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't heard fermer- I haven't heard from her in over two weeks and then recently there were, there was the fires in Australia close to by where she was. So I don't know whether she's still alive or not. I haven't heard from her in over a coupl- over two weeks.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': That's awful.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah. I heard it was real bad, it was like a hundred and eight people died from those fires.<br><br />
'''Black fan''': Daaaamn!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but you know it's okay that at least I have uh, at least I have uh, at least I have a good woman who w- who's willing to uh be at my side at this point.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Man... Uh-<br><br />
(Multiple people talk at once)<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': -for the people who are dead?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': So you feel no remorse for the people who have died in Australia?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh no no, I DO feel remorse. Especially to Sarah sh- eh- I mean... I worry about her she's still ali- I worry about- I'm concerned if she's actually dead or still alive.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah I'm sorry to hear that.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I me- I mean, I mean I'd li- I mean I pray every day that she's still alive safe and well. And that she contact me soon.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': But you... you automatically, you basically abandoned her for Julie.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But I did not basically abandon her for Julie.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': That is what it appear- seems like.<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh)...(sigh)<br><br />
'''Fan''': She could be still alive, you never know.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Even if she isn't still alive, take solace in the fact with her perfectly barbequed remains fed to survivors.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> SHUT UP!!!<br><br />
'''Fan''': Um, that was too far, you're going too far man.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. And at this point I care about both- I care about of uh both of them equally. Both uh Sarah and Julie. But it's like, it's like you know uh, I'm uh stil- if she let's me- if she uh gets in contact with me, letting me know that she's still alive, and uhh she...<br><br />
'''Fan''': But I'm letting you know Julie, if she's still alive what are you gonna do then?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': And if people actually did eat her what would you do to them?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> OH SHUT UP!!!! Kick that guy out!<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
(laughter in background)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay um. Uh...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, but you know in all seriousness if Sarah gets in contact with me and lets me know she's gonna be coming my way in real life, and uh-<br><br />
'''Fan''': You're not gonna dump Julie are you?<br><br />
(uneasy pause)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I wouldn't dump Julie as a friend.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh but! Oh...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie I still, Julie I still love you.<br><br />
'''Late guy''': Hello everyone.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But you told me I was your sweetheart, didn't you?<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh hello, Doctor.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm. (stress sigh) Julie I'm going through a- I'm going through a transition right now so it's kind of hard for me to make uh, short watch of what I say at points and y'know answering these kind of questions.<br><br />
'''Fan''': I'm sorry uh, I don't mean to offend you or anything. Well I was just wondering-<br><br />
'''Guy''': (unintelligible) guy Chris. <br><br />
'''Other guy''': Uncalled for. <br><br />
'''Black fan''': Y'know what, don't worry about Sarah. Cause, y'know it usually takes like, like months for a person, like a victim of a fire or a flood of some crap like that, to y'know find shelter and then phone and internet and all that.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': You know, if the place is in a state of emergency, people are getting moved around all over the place, there's people in the hospital, I'm sure she's fine she just can't y'know talk to anyone.<br><br />
'''Guy''': What about Alucard's question?<br><br />
'''Fan''': Wait, yeah.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) Uh, I can't answer that question.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm?<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Why not?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because I'm still in a transition right- I'm still in a transition from Sarah to Julie at this point so uh I can't answer that question right now cause I wouldn't know how to answer it.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': It seems-<br><br />
'''Guy''': So you "transition"?<br><br />
'''Fan''': It's a hard choice, I can't blame you I mean, yeah.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I mean you know what, that's- that's a flat out bad question, I mean I would- I'd be able-<br><br />
'''Other guy''': It's quite valid.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (aggravated) Auuuughh! Okay now I'm gettin' uh, okay now my head's out of order.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Oh.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': I've had that problem too.<br><br />
'''Guy''': It's never fun.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay forget it then.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Uh okay I got, I got one. Impressions, impressions! Uh, can you do one of Bill Clinton?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... no.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Um, Chris? Do you-<br><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh)<br><br />
'''Other guy''': I was wondering do you watch the Boondocks on Adult Swim?<br><br />
'''Black fan''': Aw yeah that's my show!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I've watched the Boondocks.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Did you enjoy it?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's alright.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Can you do any imitations of the characters there, like Uncle Ruckus?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent gibberish) -dem niggers over there! Sing along if you know the words to that song I just made up.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': What was that?<br><br />
'''Guy''': That was, wait, what?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That was Uncle Ruckus. Well I'll tell ya what I sell propane and propane accessories all day long! (begins a high-pitched cackling and squeals more gibberish)... That was-<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Could you do Meowth from Pokemon?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Meowth!<br><br />
'''Fan''': The talking Meowth.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Meowth! ... (cackles again) Aye Jessie, James, we gotta go snag that Pikachu again!<br><br />
'''British guy''': Do you know how to do the Team Rocket song?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, the Team Rocket song er, do you mean the motto?<br><br />
'''British guy''': Myes the motto, the classic one.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Hmmmm... Prepare for trouble make it double, to protect the world from devastation, to uni- to unite all people- o- (sigh)...<br><br />
'''Guy''': ...in our nation!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mm. Anyway... (sigh) Hang on I'm a little mixed up here. Prepare for trouble make it double, to protect the world from devastation, to unite all people within our nation, to debi- to debide(sic) the evils of truth and love, to extend our reach to the stars above. Team Rocket blast off to the speed of light, surrender now or prepare to fight.<br><br />
'''Guy''': ... Meowth, that's right.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': That's right!<br><br />
(chuckling)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Now hand over the Pikachu!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. (sigh)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Oh come on-<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': -than Sonichu, because Sonichu is obviously more powerful than Pikachu!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I will not hand over the Sonichu, so there. (pause) Alucard, stop asking the questions please?<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': Yes Alucard you are very annoying.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah someone kick him out.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br><br />
'''Guy''': Good goin' canine.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
'''Guy''': Anytime. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm. Actually I'm k- actually I'm kind of tired now uh... I'm gonna- I'm gonna head on down now but y'know I'll come back another night.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Okay.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': Well thanks for coming Chris, we really appreciate it.<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: No. I've got a few questions for you Chris, I've been waiting.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Clyde no, no, no.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': How did he get in here?<br><br />
(Everyone yells over each other)<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: It's important!<br><br />
'''Guy''': Ohh he leeeft!<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: No, no, shut up, shut up-<br><br />
'''Other guy''': He's not coming back, give up.<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: Tell him it's important it's about Panda!<br><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm digesting her right now.<br><br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde'''</font>: That will get him back in, I know it.<br><br />
'''Guy''': What's the important news?<br><br />
<br />
[End recording]<br />
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{{Transcription}}<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 6|Mumble Chat 6]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 8|Mumble Chat 8]]|}}<br />
<br />
==Links==<br />
* [https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBWklfakp0TGdDSkU Download]<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
<br />
[[Christian's sex joke]] - Used during this chat.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_7&diff=163096Mumble 72012-09-29T06:14:11Z<p>Irisviel: /* 28:35 Chris impersonates various cartoon characters */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''Mumble 7''' is the seventh of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]], held on 13 [[February 2009]].<br />
<br />
Appears to be the genesis for the "Power" videos in which Chris attempts and fails to prove his [[I AM STRONG|strength]] and [[CWC Fighter|fighting]] [[Challenge For Clyde|skill]], though these would not materialize for several months.<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
* A fan talks to Chris about putting naked posters of girls and pictures of men up in his room up to find out if his friend was a [[homo]] as Chris suggested. He tells Chris that his girlfriend dumped him over the posters and his friend ignored all of them. Chris sees nothing wrong with his advice until Julie tells him that she wouldn't like that. Chris recommends sending an anonymous letter explaining the situation and utterly fails to apologize or show concern.<br />
* Fans point out that Chris shouldn't have to show and prove that he is straight.<br />
* Chris cuts a fan off to let Julie ask a question involving [[pedofork|shota]].<br />
* Fans ask Chris to turn his radio down.<br />
* Chris uses Wal-Mart printer paper & RSVP ballpoint pen to draw, and a 50-pack of Crayola markers to color. Refuses to use color pencils or Photoshop to color, saying he prefers the markers.<br />
* Chris talks about Omicron's redone version of [[Sonichu]], accusing him of plagiarism. Says that the difference between what Omicron is doing and what he is doing is that Sonichu is his. Agrees to let Omicron continue if he credits Chris with the copyright.<br />
* '''Julie is convincing Chris to make videos proving to Clyde how strong he is.''' Chris feels that the [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|dildo breaking video]] proved this. Fans say that Chris's dildo comes apart naturally for cleaning.<br />
* '''A fan recommends making a video showing off his fighting moves to scare Clyde.'''<br />
* Chris is asked why he would use a dildo in proving that he is straight. Chris says that he is straight for crushing it, fans call him a [[homo]] for keeping it.<br />
* Chris [[lie|denies]] [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|using the dildo]], and claims that it's now broken. Fan says it could easily be reassembled. Chris is adamant that it was glued and that it took a lot of strength to pull it apart.<br />
* When asked by Julie, '''Chris admits using super-shears from Cutco to break the dildo glue, claiming to use a lot of strength in the process'''.<br />
* Fans discuss [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]]. Chris insists that it was drawn in protest of [[ED]]. He says it was anonymous, as most women have long brown hair and her eyes were censored.<br />
* Insists that [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:AngelicainGod%27sEyes.JPG the Rule 34 of Angelica Rosechu] is masturbating and enjoying it, and is using her hand to do it.<br />
* Chris thinks Billy Mays is on Home Improvement.<br />
* Chris isn't doing anything on Valentine's Day, as Julie is not there yet.<br />
* Chris discusses the the No-Redheads policy in his [[Love Quest]]. Says that redheads don't attract him unless they are not natural redheads. No piercings or tattoos allowed.<br />
* Chris is OK with blue hair.<br />
* Does a terrible Marge Simpson impersonation.<br />
* Chris impersonates Comic Book Guy and Donald Duck.<br />
* A fan presents the possibility that AIDS was sent by God to kill the [[homos]].<br />
* [[Chris and Religion|Premarital sex being forbidden in Christianity]] is discussed. Chris fumbles for an explanation.<br />
* '''A fan pretending to be black says he believes the government made AIDS to get rid of black people. Chris says that that's the kind of thing a black guy would say'''.<br />
* Premarital sex comes up again. Chris compares it to using porn to practice and learn skills for later.<br />
* The fake black fan calls Chris on his comment from earlier about black guys and AIDS. He makes the excuse that someone else said it first.<br />
* Questions on Sonichu start. Sonichu doesn't wear clothes because it's a comic. Chris isn't sure how [[Blake]] sounds. He might sound black, he might sound like Shadow the Hedgehog. The fake black fan asks why the bad guy has to be black, also mentioning [[Silvana]]. Chris says that he doesn't have to be.<br />
* Chris gets annoyed about the pronunciation of [[Rosechu]] as popularized by the Old Narrator of the [[Audiobooks]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't disagree that the Audiobooks made Sonichu more popular that he ever did'''.<br />
* He doesn't mind fanfics that don't portray Sonichu in a bad light.<br />
* The audio goes low in the main chat and a fan has a private, unrelated conversation for a few minutes.<br />
* Audio comes back as Chris is admitting that the [[B-Manajerk]] was black in real life.<br />
* Chris doesn't watch the news, so doesn't have an opinion on [[Barack Obama|Obama]]. He voted for him because he saw a documentary where he saw more of himself in Obama, namely that he was an outcast at one point.<br />
* A fan says that you should vote based on politics, not personality. Chris says that he is a moderate.<br />
* Chris doesn't know what the financial bailout is. He says that he drew the [[Sonichu 8#The Elevator Gags|racist picture]] of Obama based on his father's joke, before he saw the documentaries that made him vote.<br />
* Chris will not agree or disagree with interracial dating/marriage. He would want a white woman, but he would be [[gal pals|friends]] with others.<br />
* He'd marry an Asian.<br />
* It's not yet known if Silvana will be a good guy or if she will lose her [[pickle|dick]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't know what he wanted to be when he was younger, he's just making it up as he goes along'''.<br />
* '''Chris is keeping the name changes in the comics for legal reasons'''.<br />
* A fan suggests Slaweel cursing Rosechu to have a dick. Chris gets upset before saying that he'll think about it. The fans think it's a great idea. One considers a talking penis for Rosechu. Chris says it's a stupid idea.<br />
* Another fan asks about Chris being sacked from Wendy's. He denies scaring the child with his Donald Duck impersonation, saying that he didn't make him cry.<br />
* Chris might release his DVD one day.<br />
* A fan says that Chris has influenced underground rappers such as Immortal Technique, who has sampled him.<br />
* Chris takes requests. Impersonates MC Hammer, Dr Nick Riviera, Peter from [[Family Guy]], Mario and Sonic, butchering them all and tainting our childhood memories.<br />
* More Sonichu questions. '''Chris won't upload [[Zapina]] [[Rule 34]] because she is underage and Chris is worried about legal ramifications'''. When he is reassured that this would be legal, he says he would consider it. He will also consider Sonichu-Rosechu anal sex. Rosechu would not clean the [[pickle]] with her mouth, she would clean it off with a washcloth. He would not sell the the washcloth on EBay.<br />
* Chris calls a stop to the potty humor displayed throughout the Sonichu questions.<br />
* '''Chris denies that [[Yawning Squirtle]] is a character'''.<br />
* Fans ask for a joke. He recites a dreadful rhyme about Videogame consoles. He then tells his awful [[Christian's sex joke|sex joke]]. Fans start to tell racist jokes about [[niggos|black people]] and Mexicans. Chris calls for a stop to this.<br />
* A fan says that his friend [[mass debating|masturbated]] to the [[rule 34|adult section of Sonichu]] and is now worried that his friend is a [[homo]], as they were drawn by a man. '''Chris says that this is what he intended it for''', and they are drawings of women, so his friend is straight. He doesn't masturbate to his own drawings.<br />
* Chris reassures a fan that [[Mass Debating|masturbating]] in the same room as another man isn't gay as long as both men are thinking of women, but he would not do this.<br />
* Chris offers no comment as to what constitutes adultery.<br />
* Chris says that he is patriotic. Asked to sing the national anthem, he instead mangles a few lines of "My Country, 'Tis of Thee". He then tells a 'patriotic' joke that is insensitive to Mexicans. [[Chris and Hypocrisy|The fans call him on his "no more racist jokes" statement from earlier]].<br />
* Chris does a poor impersonation of Mr T.<br />
* Chris says that if you are married, sleeping with someone else isn't cheating if you have consent from your spouse.<br />
* Chris gives more advice on homos and recommends Axe body spray for attracting girls.<br />
* Chris has not met any celebrities, only local DJs.<br />
* Does impersonations of Homer Simpson and Bender. The two sound identical.<br />
* Chris gives dating advice: Stay calm, polite, friendly and don't let your nerves get the best of you. Say "Hello, how are you" and talk about yourself. '''[[Barbara|His mom]] told him that standing around with a sign makes him look retarded. A female fan cracks up laughing and can't stop'''.<br />
* "Those who can't, teach"<br />
* Chris says he has never even been on a date. Rejects dating suggestions from fans.<br />
* '''Chris was close with Sarah "[[PandaHalo]]" McKenzie, but hasn't heard from her in over two weeks. He heard about the fires and doesn't know if she's still alive. When a fan adds that 108 people were killed in the fires, Chris responds to the entire ordeal with [[Chris and death|"It's OK though, at least I have a good woman who's willing to be by my side at this point"]]'''.<br />
* When pushed, he says he feels remorse for the the victims of the fires and is concerned that [[Sarah Cassandra McKenzie|Panda]] is dead.<br />
* He asserts that he didn't abandon Sarah for [[Julie]].<br />
* '''A fan says that if [[PandaHalo|Sarah]] isn't alive, Chris should take solace that her perfectly barbecued remains fed the survivors. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|SHUT UP!!!]]'''<br />
* Chris says that he cares about Sarah and Julie equally and wouldn't dump Julie as a friend. A fan asks what he will do to the survivors who ate Sarah. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|"SHUT UP!!!"]] and demands that he be booted.<br />
* Fans reassure Chris that Sarah is probably OK.<br />
* Chris does abominable impersonations of Uncle Ruckus from The Boondocks and Hank Hill. '''He sings "Don't Trust Them New [[Niggos|Niggas]] Over There"'''. He also impersonates Meowth and sings the Team Rocket song.<br />
* [[Clyde]] enters. Chris refuses to answer questions and leaves.<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
===Chris proves he is straight===<br />
'''Guy:''' Chris!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all! ''[echoes]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'll be damned.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh, Chris-[gets cut off by another guy]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh you know, can't com- it's uh, can't complain.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' How's construction of the site?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' [unintelligible] so Chris<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I...I need to ask you something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yup?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh... I put those posters, of the... Playboy and everything in my room, and uh, one of my girlfriends saw it, and she got mad at me for looking at other w-... other girls, and she broke up with me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh... I'm sorry to hear that. It could-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, she's calling me a pervert. I-I don't understand this.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Did you... did you ex- did you try to explain to her about situation between you and that guy?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I... I did, and I don't think she understood.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... well, you should try, you should, uh, s-... try, uh, you should try wr-, you should tr-, uh, do you know her email address?<br /><br />
[pause]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So, uh Chris-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' A-also, wait... also, uh, the friend, I was talking about, he, uh, visited, and [typing noises] he, uh, he went into my room, and didn't even notice the posters. He just s-sat in the middle, he didn't s...sit in any uh, part of the room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Huh. Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, uh... so, yeah, I don't know. I mean, my girlfriend broke up with me, called me a pervert, said that I shouldn't be looking at other girls, I mean... I don't know what to do now.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well listen, uh, answer my question, do you have her email address?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Umm... yeah, but she won't... she won't answer me anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm... ok, hmm. Here's what you can do, uh... Do you know your girlfriend's... any of your girlfriend's [[Gal pal|gal-pals]]?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm... well, you should try to... like wr- you should write out... hmm... hmm... here's an idea. S- Write a letter to her and send it via smail mai-, via snail mail, but don't write the return address. On it.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What should I write?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just like, you know, like, they, you know, this is... you know, this is... you, uh, you put your name there, and you, it's, and then you would basically explain the situation between you and that guy, and that's why you had the posters up, well that's why you put the posters up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't really understand what was the point of the posters in the first place?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[sigh]'' it's... ''[sigh]'' if he looks at... if he, if he is very interested, if he is, if he was straight, he would uh, look at the women. Very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But he didn't even notice them. He didn't notice any of the posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, then I guess he is a [[Homos|homo]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' W...well, um, he wasn't looking at anything, not even the guy posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Hmm... He's not blind, surely.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, like, what is he, is he like, uh...I don't know.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I don't know either, man. But, you know at the moment I would suggest you, uh, write the- write the letter to your girlfriend, send the mail, don't write your return address on the envelope, and, uh, mail it to her.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Also my mom saw the posters and she got offended, she's like really religious and st- she said that like, uh, you know, lust is a sin or some shit. Oh, like she said, she's like all against the, the uhh, the like, Playboy in my room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, your- apparently your mom hasn't been [beeps] that open minded that time. So, you know, give her time to reh-cover, she'll uh, she might op- she might open up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I don't think that was a good idea though, I mean, w-why did-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -you suggest it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I was trying to see if he, to, I was trying to s-help you figure out if your uh, if your friend was a homo or not.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I know, but, do you have uh, [Fans talking] Playboy posters in your room?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unclear] I'm very forward.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I have uh, poster of some, of uh, I have a poster in my room of uh, some uh, naked girls I got from adamandeve.com as a bonus.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Then, nobody says anything about it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[clears throat]'' Well, I didn't really have too many oppor- too many people in my room. So, it's kind of like in a hard to notice place.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Um, wondering, um, If you showed anyone, wouldn't they be offended?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe, maybe not, [Fan grunts] it just depends on their point of view.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I wouldn't want the same thing that happened to me to happen to you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I hear you there. Uh, just to so just sound clear... Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie, are you there?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ok, uh, would you be offended if you saw such a poster in my room?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''[breaks up]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, What will, what was that? [Echoes]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie'''</span> Yes I would, kind of.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well that's no problem, I can take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, see that's what I'm talking about, I mean...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, that's why I asked Julie right now, because I respect her. So, because she said that she would, I will take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I've been thinking, um...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you have... [unclear] Chris, I don't think you should look at other woman.[sic] In my opinion.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I see, Julie. Well that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I...I respect that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' She might get jealous, I mean, that's what happened to my...my girlfriend.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, that's fine Julie, I respect your, I respect that. Just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey, can I ask you a question? If uh, he's done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, uh, one more thing, um, you know I've been thinking, uh, I don't really think you need, you know, posters and stuff like,<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' to prove you're straight, I mean, if you're straight, that's all there is to it i-if, am I right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think you're right.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I...I mean, you shouldn't have to prove that you're straight.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> You're right.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I m-mean [line breaks temporarily] Y-you shouldn't have to reassure yours-self. You should just be knowing it, and nothing anybody says, should get very, uh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, it's ve-ah-very-but you see, I have like, I have that [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] in my room, it's just, so that like, you know, for in case I have any-for in case I have any random thoughts, on account really, to tempt me.<br /><br />
''[unintelligible mix of chatter from most participants trying to get their word in]''<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I mean, even if they're random thoughts, even if they're random thoughts, if you know you're ''positive'' about it, you shouldn't have to look at anything to make sure.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, usually.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay. Uh, moving on from all this homosexuality, uh, I have one question, uh- [gets cut off by Chris in the background] ...never mind, [fat douchebag?]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey, ah, let Julie ask a question, let Julie ask her question.<br /><br />
<br />
===7:08 Julie asks about shotacon===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, I was watching you on the Internet yesterday and, what's a shotacon?[slightly cut off]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...I'm sorry, uh-y, I'm sorry, you got cut off, what was that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> What's a sho-[cuts off again]-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...What's a...''short''?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Shot-[cuts off third time, pretty obvious she's saying ''shota'']-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dude, shota.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, shota.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ssshhhh...shota?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, S-H-O-A-T-A [sic].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, it's a word he found online.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, [baby?], yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never heard of that word.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I dunno, if you want to look it up, you can probably find out on an online dictionary...<br /><br />
''[pause, and a weary sigh from someone other than Chris]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'll-I'll take a look. Hang on.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I know some Japanese and I think I've heard that somewhere, like in a magazine or something.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, it's some of that Japanese shit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Probably is. Three moments, I'll look it up.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Okay!<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's radio is audible]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Whoops, that was the wrong one. The wrong bookmark.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' S-H-O-T-A.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I know, I just get the wrong bookmark for...place I wi-for like...dictionary-type website that I have.<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's keyboard taps are audible]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uhhh...Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, now that Julie's done with her question, I also had one.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' He has to find what that means first.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, ''I'm sorry''.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Shit, ah shit, I've just found it on Wikipedia. It's, uh, it's a ma-it's a Japanese name. It's a name of a person. In Japan.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Really.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a Japanese name. I think it's-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh no no, I think you're looking at the wrong thing, it's S- S-H-O-T-A-C-O-N.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> S-H- I mean- O-T-A-C-O-N? Shotacon?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's the same thing, just put C-O-N at the end.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I've read it in a dictionary before, can't remember what it means...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, oh! Okay, here it is, uh..."shotacon, sometimes shortened to shota, is Japanese slang of the phrase 'Shotaro Complex'"...uh..."that describes the attraction to young boys or an individual with such an attraction".<br /><br />
''[Disgusted reactions heard]''<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh my god, what the fuck?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' There's lots of sick people. Y'all are gonna get ricked?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Someone from 4 cent garbage came in and told us to look that up, I didn't-I didn't even want to.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess he's a homo...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Don't worry I banned him already.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Um, Chris, Vivian wants to know if you can like, turn your radio down a bit, it's distracting.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yes, please turn it down.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I thought that was quiet enough, here.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, no, the lady'll probably pick it up<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Alright cool. Merci.<br /><br />
<br />
===10:21 Another fan asks about art supplies===<br />
<br />
'''Another Fan:''' Okay, um, I have a question, um, I like to draw—interrupted by mumbling—I like to draw comics and such, I mean I want to start up a webcomic. What kind of materials do you use?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, like, you mean for drawing?<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well mostly I just use like, uh, paper without lines, like, computer printer paper you can get in, like, Wal-Mart, for an inexpensive price in multiples.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then I use like an RES—RSVP-brand pen with the black ink.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh okay, is it like, um, a gel pen or a ballpoint pen or-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like a ballpoint, it's like a ballpoint pen.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What do you use to color?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I use Crayola brand markers.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would like to—I would—I would—I would recommend getting the Super Tip 50-pack which you can also find at the Wal-Mart.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay. I-[interrupted by someone else on chat]<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's basically-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' At Wal-Mart I usually get the 24-color RoseArts. Those are—those do pretty good too.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhh, Vivian, just so you—just so you know, I'm using the microphone that came with Hey You, Pikachu for Nintendo Sisty-Four [sic].<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, yeah no, no offense, but uh, personally I prefer like, colored pencils and shit cause-[Chris mumbling is heard]-they're like easier to erase. Photoshop [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If you want to use colored pencils that's fine, I'm not, uh, saying that you have to use Crayola markers-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why don't you use colored pencils? They're really good, you should try one on like, at least one page, just try one. One page with just colored pencils.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But um, actually, you can—you can scan your drawings and then color—color them in like, Photoshop or something. [rest of chat murmurs in agreement] That looks really professional, and really good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I prefer using the markers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's just that I-I mean—I mean I've tried—I mean I've colored with colored pencils before, and I just feel best with using markers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I have a question, um, uh, the Hey You Pikachu microphone, how does that work on the, you're using that on your computer? Did you say?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah it's just, yeah, it's like you plug it into uh, into the basic microphone jack.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh, yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Excuse me, I have a nice little Plantronics headset.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Hey Chris can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah, hang on a second, uh... uh, Omicron, that's uh, you're basically, uh, you're basically plagiarizing here. You're even using, uh, parts of my original drawings to, uh, make up your so called real ones and, you're just—you're just parroting—you're just plagiarizing-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's dirty and illegal.<br /><br />
[Unintelligible mumbling]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, you said so yourself, you're being illegal. And plus, and plus I'm-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, isn't combining Sonic with Pikachu the same thing?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, but, but but also, look at this, also I'm looking at this site here, it said, he's claiming the copyright for himself, but he's, but he's not. I mean that's like, but he's, he—he says<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' You need to ban him immediately.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, ban him immediately.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh wait wait wait wait wait...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah maybe you should check-[interrupted by loud noise, probably Chris]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well he said that, he's saying that all of Sonichu material is copyrighted by him, when it's clearly not.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah but you use Sonic and Pikachu, and you copyrighted it-<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' He just offered to give you credit-[interrupted by noisy chatter]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean, I put, I mean, yeah but, I mean, I'm talking about the—the Omnicron [sic] guy here, that's like, just put this link here.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh he offered to give you credit-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes that's the same thing you did.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well no no, he, no-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We decided-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No he's plagiarizing MY Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We just decided [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris it's, it's a parody, kinda like Sonichu is.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but he—yeah, but he's saying, he said—he—on his front page he says, all Sonichu material-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah but he's, he just offered to change it, so are you okay with that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> By changing it to Sonichu X-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, he said he'll give you credit instead of claiming it for himself.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, uh, yeah I would appreciate that, that would be better, yeah, if... he changed that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Alright cool.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Problem solved.<br /><br />
<br />
===15:02 Chris talks about dildos to prove his strength===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes Julie.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you think you could tell everyone about my idea? And, since you're going to do it do you think you could tell everyone so they could look out for it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, your idea... um, oh oh oh, yeah, just basically a video of me standing up to Clyde and showing him how strong I am, doin' a few kicks for the camera or something-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, you should throw some punches, show him what you're made of, you know?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Kick, punch, it's all in the mind ''etc.''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I basically... I pretty much did that when I...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Let him talk, c'mon!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I pretty much did - already proved my strength when I... ripped that... ''dildo'' in half.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Foreign-Sounding Guy:''' Most dildos come apart for cleaning.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' C'mon.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but that thing was screwed together at the seam.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok listen to me...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris...<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' Eh Chris!<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ...could you do a like further test of your strength for me?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''stress sigh'' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I wanna see how strong you are please.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...That's fine, I can do that.<br /><br />
'''Other Fan:''' I mean that's ok, you showed your strength, but you should show her your moves. Like show her, like, what kind of moves you can do.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, let me tell you a story about how this'll work, ok.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' See, my, uh, one of my cousins, uh, this guy at school, kept, y'know, picking on him, calling him gay and stuff, and trying to fight with him, and my cousin told him to sss- y'know, one day, the guy said "Hey man, I'm gonna beat you up" and my cousin said "Look, if I show you some of my moves, I'll prove to you I can kick your ass in a fight" and so my cousin, y'know, he stepped back and, he took, uh, he took Tae Kwon Do, and he did a couple moves, y'know? He just stood there for like five minutes just doing his moves, and, y'know, some punches and kicks and... The guy just backed right off; he didn't even want to talk to him any more. So I think that should work.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> All right, well I'll try that. I'll try that.<br/><br />
'''Guy:''' All right. Sounds good.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br?><br />
'''Fan:''' You try- you always mention about how you're straight but yet in your video about you crushing a dildo, uh, doesn't that kinda like, y'know, not help your cause?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, it proves I'm straight because...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' But you have a dildo.<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I got it free with an order on adameve.com<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' But you ''kept'' it and shit. That ain't cool.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' What I don't... Why were there batteries in...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh yeah Chris, why ''were'' there batteries in it? Why did you keep it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I mean...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it wasn't an easy thing for me to sell, right off the bat, or even to make a profit, so...<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In fact in a way it's a good thing I kept it, cause it allowed me to be able to break it, like I did.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes but why would you keep it?<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why would you keep it?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I woulda saved it for my sweetheart, if she'd wanted it. To use it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Aaaahhh.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But if I were there wouldn't you prefer the real deal?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Some things that metal just can't replace.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Yeah.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I heard that.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' You didn't use it did you?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No I did not.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Did you just throw all the ones you had away?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I only had that one. And there you go, I ri- there you go, I broke it apart.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you just, like, ''take'' it apart, I mean, it did...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' ...seem to come apart, like, screwed on...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I did not take it apart, that thing was glued at the seam. I had to put a lot of strength into breaking it at the middle there.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, but I think, um, showing your moves would be better.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Right.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Clyde would mess with you if you show him you can kick his ass.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey, Chris's a muthafuckin' ''gangsta''!<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Blap blap.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yes, Chris will fuck Clyde's shit up.<br /><br />
(awkward pause)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait, Chris, didn't you say you used a - didn't you say you used scissors to break the dildo?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I pretty much did have to so I could break that ''glued seam''.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, I thought you broke it with your hands.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well I- yeah well I would have but it was dang glued at the seam, so I clipped straight in with the scissors I had.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a pair of Super Shears from [[Cutco]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(feigning interest)'' Huh.<br /><br />
<br />
===19:50 Chris defends his Rule 34===<br />
<br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, let's talk about something else. Uh, Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whenever the announcement of the adult Sonichu page, when I looked at your gallery, very nice stuff, you know, I see a picture of what looks like you with a Sonichu, uh, medallion. Like, and, who's that one girl, exactly?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Who, [[Megan]]?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I thought it was, like, [[Crystal]], cause of the hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, it was - it was originally drawn to be Megan but I censored her eyes to, uh, port- to protect her identity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Mmmmmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''(laughing)'' That's stupid! (?) That's so silly.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I drew that after I found the ED page in November.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you say that?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In protest against it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thought you were going to get rid of it anyway.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I tore up the original drawing, I, in- into squares, and I put in in an envelope.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you upload it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you do that shit? Like, and...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I understand Rosechu, but, like y'know, why, like, something that's from real life. That's the problem (?)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's not necessarily from real life, it depends on you inter- it depends on your interpretation, I mean it's hardly- I mean, '''most women have long brown hair, and the eyes are censored''', so...<br/><br />
(laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''Most'' women?!?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I remember in that one video you were saying it was Megan.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because it broke, because it end up, because it the end it broke up my friend - broke up my friendship eve, my uh, friendship with Megan.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um, can I ask you a question? In the third picture, with [[Angelica Rosechu]], what is... what's happening, is... God... doing...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nope. She's masturbating. And she's enjoying it.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But she has no hands there. How's she doing it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' She's ''enjoying'' it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But she does... She does...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah but how's she doing it? She doesn't have her hands there.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> She does have her hands, she's... ''(stress sigh)'' She's... like most women would be able to do the same thing.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thing it's the angle, Julie. I think it's the angle you were looking at it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah plus uh, the picture wasn't, uh, very - wasn't as clear as, like, you know, I would have liked to have had it, uh, I mean, I had that file for a while, and it...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah some of those are kinda blurry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, some deg- some degraded.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ? a good question, have you drawn anything... of... have you drawn anything like that with me? Cause I would actually like to see, if you did. If so, could you, and let me see? I, uh, sorry, that's very rude to ask.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm sorry, let me answer this guy. Yeah, well, I made a retraction video later saying that I- I disowned that address.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ah, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just after that guy hacked into it and changed to it to suck. And as such.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hang on, I'm gonna take a look at that... My Youtube...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I like this song.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What song?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' The song that's playing in the background of, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what do you think of, uh, what do you think of that guy who advertises products, Billy Mays? What do you think of him?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... Billy... Oh! Yeah he's an ok guy, I watched him on Home Improvement.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Billy Mays?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, that was another guy on Home Improvement, Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No that was the same guy. That was the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Really?!? Let's look up. IMDB, go. ''(sound of typing)''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Believe me, it's the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, I really enjoyed your, um, adult, uh, section of the site.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... okey dokey, very good. Aaahh, trying to figure out how to update the link on this thing here. Oh, maybe under here. Oh there it is, thank God (?), update right now.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(singing)'' You spin me right round baby, right round...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (joining in) Like a record baby, right round round round<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's a classic, I can't help in man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There you are, updated. It's finally fixed.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Actually that was Richard Karn on Home Improvement, not Billy Mays.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well my mistake, I mean the guy had the beard and uhh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh yeah I can understand.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And the voice sounds- and the voice sounds the same...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah. They sound the same.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There's a matter of interpretation apparently I misinterpreted so I will admit that I was wrong.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah see we all make mistakes, don't be too hard on yourself.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unintelligible babble or singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you gotten any fan art submissions or notable? For the uh- webpage?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I got one today... It's like mostly a drawing of that uh that uh- of the fan herself.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -got in the snail mail today.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -Sunday.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hmmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What are you doing for this Valentine's day Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhm... I'm sorry, what was that question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What will you be doing this year on Valentine's day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm depends...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ahhh, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm.<br /><br />
Fan: Surely a man of such magnitude as yourself are going to be doing something important, aren't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Magnitude? Way to choose the words buddy.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Vocabulary talent.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, cause I don't have Julie over here yet.<br /><br />
(Reactions of OHs and AHs)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If she was here...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible) -play games.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Or we could just uh... talk.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Ehehehehe. Maybe... uh... why no redheads?<br /><br />
'''Other Woman:''' Yeah?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I was trying to think about that when the other guy asked that question. Uh... I was trying to think up that unh... mmmm... Uhhhh, redheads just don't be very- tract me so much.<br /><br />
Several: Uh, ah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's- it's- a- pi- a possibility that they're dyed.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmmmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But yeah y'know natural redheads enh, yeah, just don't really turn me on as much.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I see...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you thought about girls with um, highlights?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... (pause) aaahhhh... what turns me on hhh- (inhales) (pause) obviously the women.<br /><br />
'''Man:''' Gotta have the women. (?)<br /><br />
'''Guy''': What about piercings or tattoo?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, neither of those.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhhh-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris! How bout like non-orange hair, not like... no, never mind. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... oh... okay... hmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait Chris! How do you feel about blue hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Blue hair's okay, otherwise I wouldna- Otherwise I wouldn't've liked Sailor Mercury.<br /><br />
'''British? guy:''' That is true, she does have blue hair.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' She's a very fine character. There is no way to deny it.<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Blue hair is OFF DA HOOK!!!<br/><br />
<br />
===28:35 Chris impersonates various cartoon characters===<br />
<br />
'''British??? guy:''' Doesn't Marge Simpson have blue hair as well?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (in some kind of insane voice) Oh yeah! Marge Simpson has blue hair and it's as tall as the Empire State building!!!<br /><br />
(Some HMMs UHs and UMs follow)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yo Chris!! Can you do some impersonations for us?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Oh we'd love to hear that!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just did Marge Simpson.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah you're really talented.<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(Several people talking at once)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> -they're really good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Do another SimpsonsChris, how about Comic Book Guy?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Mmmmhmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I'm very indeed. Oh aren't we all promiscuous and whatnot. I like Batman and Robin, oh look! Stan Marsh has come into the thing again - I forget that guy's name, that guy who did the Marvel comics.<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Stan Lee. (Pause) Chris do your Donald Duck impression.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Everybody have fun (incoherent and scary quacking)<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris you should work for Disney.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's good Chris.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Have you ever considered being a voice actor?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Errrrrp... possibly, I'm not sure.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (incoherent, cut off by Chris)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent... another cartoon voice)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris, you're a Christian, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I was just wondering-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahm actu-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -do you just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm actually a Methodist church.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome, I was just wondering: Do you think AIDS was sent by god to kill the homos or do you think that it's just an accident or something man-made?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thou- the thought never occurred to me... thought never occurred to me.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' can you do an impression of Arnold Schwarzenegger?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hold- the question...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Let Chris answer the question.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thought- the thought never occurred to me about what you just said about the AIDS there mmmm... but y'know, it's a possibility and I will not agree nor disagree with it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I was just wondering I mean, I've had that discussion with some of my Christian friends. I just wanted to get your opinion, thank you.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmhhh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think (clears throat) I think Omicron has a point and you did tell me you went to a methodist church didn't you? So that's-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well th- well my Methodist church is uh more loose on- is not as strict on uh- on uh sex.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris I don't know- I don't know that much about religion in the States but I don't think there is a looser Meth- Methodist church. God makes the rules Omicron says.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, hmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well, you know personally I think that the government made AIDS to kill off all the brothers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whoa, whoa... That's what the blacks always say.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. (pause) I'm going to agree, that sounds like something that uh... well, a black guy would say.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So your church is kinda of uh- they let you do- their kinda loose on the whole moral restrictions?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... (pause) uhhh... that's... what's the question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Your church they- you said they're kind of more uh- y'know they're less strict on the whole moral thing, like, as far as sexuality goes? Right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -ah basically.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But y'know, uhh, I thought you're supposed to listen to the Bible or whatever not, y'know, not necessarily- no, never mind.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (interrupts)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, there's also a uh, there's also a- think about this uh, if you uh- if you- if you were a think uh- you have to find for yourself a good meaning behind uh- good meaning behind watching pornography to uh- like teach how it- how to do this and that when you actually get around to doing it...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's all ???<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's all's considered education for yourself.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' How is that realistic at all?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, it's uh- not a really good thing to learn from, trust me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It can be done before marriage as well as long as me and my sweetheart really love each other very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But not in Christianity.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But all I'm saying is y'know, porn is completely, completely unre- unrealistic I mean you can't really learn anything from it.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It gives- it gives you enough ideas.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unclear)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (incoherent) porn.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' When you actually have sex, it's nothing like porn.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe not like you, you not gonna do it-<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' You can't do it immediately- immediately anal sex cause most women are not very happy with anal sex and also...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay, shut up<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' -and also weird-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Shut up.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Yes.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And... that wasn't cool, like...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That was uncalled for...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, like, suthin' a BLACK MAN would say...<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' That's racist man...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, somebody said it on here first before I did.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Does that make it ok?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, I think he's trying to make it clear that- I dunno.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I typically agree with that guy.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So nothing g- it doesn't make it ok.<br /><br />
(incoherent)<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling) I wi- I'm sorry, I take it back.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(unclear)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Guys can we get back to Sonichu, Please?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah this is getting ridiculous.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unclear) -Sonichu actually.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Anyway, my question is that: why does Sonichu not wear clothes while Rosechu and the other Rosechus do wear clothes? And underwear?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Aaaaaaaaaamp... It's like uh- it's basically a cartoon and it doesn't really matter, it's like... mm... think about this: Most cartoon characters wear at least one article of clothing. At least one article. And uh- it's like Yogi Bear who just wears a necktie and a hat.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 35.14)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Other Guy:''' I think it would be cool if all the Sonichus and Rosechus got together and they and- they all formed a big team and they had special uniforms or something, kinda like the X-men.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Or Power Rangers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh yeah, I don't do- I don't do well- I'm not in- no uniforms. It's a uniform and other Sonichus and Rosechus.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'm just wondering if you'd do another impression: What does Blachu sound like? Uh, Black Sonichu? Or Blake?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eeeeuuunh... Eh... ahhhh...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Can you imitate it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... I'm not sure... uhhhhm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Like does he sound black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Possibly, but I'm not certain. I'm not leaning towards it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I'd like to hear it, but if you don't want...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just never- I just never really thought about that. I'd say that he possibly sounds similar to uh, y'know Shadow the hedgehog. But he could possibly sound, black. He could. Don't quote me on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' All right, I was just wondering if you'd do his voice but...<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Hey why does the BAD guy gotta be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never said the bad guy "has to" be black. (pause) I mean, look at the- the range of villanies, I mean there's black and whites and uh... male females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I noticed that uh- Silvana's also... black lookin'.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just decided to color her black because she was born- she came from outer space from a black egg, which was the- which came out of the rainbow.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah, I was also wonderin' about that like-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I- I- I-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' If Silvana came out of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes it's-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Why would she be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' I mean like black ain't part of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like the black sheep of the family. Y'know you put all the colors together and it does become black.<br /><br />
(unintelligible reactions)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -like a brownish-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) is a (unintelligible) color.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Maybe it's because she's from space and there's not a lot of light in space and it's dark or something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah that- a uh yeah- that's one of the-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hmmm.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhm, did you look at the link of my friend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, ummmm...<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Yeah, since you love blue hair.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh- no I haven't looked at it and I don't wanna make Julie feel jealous if I did- if I went and did.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Julie would mind.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhhh...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You look at pornography don't you?<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' (mumble)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, that- that was two syllables "Rose-chu". You don't- don't add- don't say the "e" it's just "Rosechu".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah you went over this last chat.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>(I don't know, it sounds like "narrator")<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sounds like he says "narrator" again)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh... I was just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, well, obviously the uh- the narrator who did those audio books was incorrect. Specially since I never gave that person the approval to do the audiobooks.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think it's just a fan project and I think he-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' and I think he might have one of the West coast dialects. I know that the South they say y'all but over here-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well obviously he lied-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -different. I'd be proud if they made one of my projects into an audiobook though. That means that there are a lot of fans out there that really like it.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Ay.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' They're not selling to try and make any money off it. They're not trying to rip you off. They always made sure- they always narrate the first page by saying "Christian Weston Chandler" so they're not trying to cheat you or anything.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' The people know you're making it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I- I hear that. I just, apparently they misin- misinterpreted the (audio breaks up) name Rosechu. Or mispronounced it. Misinterpreted, mispronounce- fairly the same thing in that situation... possibly. To answer that question... possibly.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uh, Vivian said that the audiobooks made Sonichu way popular that- than you could ever ever do on your own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I will not disagree with the statement. And I appreciate her help.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris. Would you be offended if a fan wrote a fanfiction about Sonichu?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Faaanfiction... if it's- if it's not demeaning or makes them look stupid. Then it's fine- it's fine. (pause) Like I did mind when, shoot, what's his name? That guy... uhhhh... that guy that the uhhhh... did the animations, on his computer.<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' You did mind or you didn't?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Animations???<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think I know what he's talking about. Are you talking about the um...<br /><br />
<br />
(background noise begins)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' Well the original play was a Greek play. Where they're all y'know... Greeks... and crazy stuff happens and they're all runnin' around in togas. So if you ever wanna see the movie "A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum" it was a classic and it had some real classic people from the 50s and 60s in it. Kinda like "It's a MAD MAD MAD MAD World". Sort of a classic old school movie from funny old school world. First color movie type thing. But that'll be a high school play. You'll wanna see that. You might actually enjoy it. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
(inaudible response)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' You never know that might be fun to do. Well I guess that wouldn't work on the weekend then... you gotta...<br /><br />
<br />
'''(FOR THOSE OF YOU WONDERING WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON, IT APPEARS THAT THERE WAS SOME TECHNICAL PROBLEM THAT CAUSED ANOTHER MUMBLE CHANNEL TO BE RECORDED WHILE THE CONVERSATION WITH CHRIS BECAME BARELY AUDIBLE BACKGROUND NOISE. INSTEAD ALL THAT CAN BE HEARD IS SOME BUTTFACE YAMMERING ABOUT FILMS AND TELEVISION SHOWS. I'M NOT GOING TO KEEP TRANSCRIBING IT. CHRIS IS STILL TALKING AND ANSWERING QUESTIONS, BUT NOTHING CAN BE UNDERSTOOD OVER THESE GUYS.)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''(AT 42.56 THE AUDIO SUDDENLY RESUMES NORMALLY)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Unknown person:''' Uh you-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I uh- noticed he's another BLACK villain.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah in real life he was black. Without meaning any offense to the uh- black guy in general, cause you've noticed, among the Jerkops there's uh- we got black's and white's, males and females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(several people jump in at once)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) -you've never drawn a female officer before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well y'know uhhh... uhhh, comic book number 7, near the end. Near the end of the time travel episode. Uhh, I have no opinion about what Obama's doing cause I don't watch the news.<br /><br />
Accented woman: But you voted for him, didn't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes I voted for him because I saw myself in him when I com- when I saw both the documentaries and downloaded them for the Playstation Network between Obama and McCain. I mean voted for a person I saw more of myself of-<br /><br />
Accented woman: You usually vote for someone based on their political leanings, not how you view them. As I were Republican, I voted for John McCain. Not because I liked him but because I- he had the same political views as me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basi- basically I'm a moderate.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh, I see. Um, I was wondering. I was reading opinions: do you agree with his financial bailouts?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm, I don't even know what it is. So I can't disagree or agree.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Well, to make it short um, it's about uh- the government- President Obama is planning to uh- a new one- (cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You got cut off there.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uhh, ok, we lost him.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yo, Chris, uh, do you, you didn't just vote for Obama cause he was black, did you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I did not vote for him because he was black. I voted for him cause I saw myse- because I saw myself in him. In like, similar lifestyles. And I saw that he was a good man, I mean after all, com- I saw- I saw I watched both of the A&E documentaries, before I can- before I knew who I would vote for.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 45.29)'''<br /><br />
<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris:, Chris what did you see in him that you say in your self?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Like for one thing we were like outcasts, at least one point in our lives.<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Wait, wait hold up earlier you said that you thought he would probably paint the white house black.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh oh that was my father’s joke he said that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Is your father a racist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but you see I drew that for him before I saw the documentaries so respectfully withdrew that comic page.<br /><br />
'''???:''' does your father hate black people.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Not necessarily but it’s just how my father just how my father that does not reflect in any way that’s how he felt (annoying ass noise in the background)<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Man that racist.<br /><br />
'''??? :''' Hey Chris I so the ahh saw the Sonichu and Rosechu love sack that you put up and I thought if was pretty cool for (you adult friends?) I just had a question though: do you have any plans in the comic to have romance between you and one of the hedgehogs I mean-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Yelling) No no no<br /><br />
'''???:''' -we would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' I mean is was just wondering because there are fans how would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Now- now that you answered the his question my kind of relates to his what are your thoughts on inter racial breeding and marriages?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would not agree of disagree with them but in my personal preference I would fell- I would feel more comfortable in having a full relationship with a white woman but I am willing- am still willing to be friends and acquaintances and give and have respect for the black women as well.<br /><br />
'''???:''' What about Asians like Japanese?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I’m ok with them as well (yelling) a once.<br /><br />
'''???:''' So would you get married with a Japanese woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hhhmmmm I would have, yes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> but I’m giving Julie to opportunity here.<br /><br />
'''Clyde:''' Julie’s a lucky woman.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris, I was just wondering, is Silvana gonna become one of the good guys, like- like Black Sonichu did before?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There’s a possibility but I have not given that a co- I have not confirmed that yet.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Uh, is she gonna lose the male sexual parts and become a full-fledged woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhhmmm possibly but I haven’t given that- I haven't given that thought either.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Also um I was reading (?Phillip’s?) question, Chris what did you want to be when you were little?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don’t remember, I do not remember. I’m just making it as I go basically.<br /><br />
'''???:''' is there ever gonna be like uh, an end to your sonichu series like a finale?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hmmmm I don’t know, probably would not.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Oh so it keeps going and going?<br /><br />
???: You ever consider making comic about the history of CWCville?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhmmmm an episode dedicated towards that possibility.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris are you going to keep the name changes that you made or are you going back to the original names?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahhh ya I’m keeping the name changes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' But you know umm Nintendo was umm, y'know, they sent you a letter you never really talk about it further.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but at least- at least- the hel- they use to benefit me for the fact that uh allowed me to fix noting in that sense so I couldn’t be sued by such people in that sense.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 50 min)'''<br /><br />
<br />
(scattered reactions)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So the name changes were good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So uh, Chris I was wondering if uh Mary- Mary Lee Walsh Or I guess the new name: Ryam Sla- I don't know-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Sla-weel.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Slaweel, thank you. Uhm, if she were to use her magic to curse Rosechu with a penis, would Soni- what- wou- would that test the relationship between Sonichu and her? While they were fighting the battle to have it removed, I'm just curious.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... Firstly uh, she does not- she does not have the power ch- to do that.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I just thought you know, remember you did the story about 4-cent-garbage and drawing all the- the picture and-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah you what, that's one- that's one thing: drawing them, but not actually putting them on the character.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Cause I think that would be like an epic story though, like to actually have a quest-<br /><br />
Fan: I'll second that.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -to go to have that penis removed from Rosechu. I mean it's a test of romance between her and Sonichu.<br /><br />
(muttering)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And when that prevails and the penis is removed and everybody- everybody lives happily ever after. Y'know that would be awesome.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnnnnnh, I dunno I have to- I dunno I have to think about that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It is a really good idea. I like it.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I do too.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah, that's good.<br /><br />
Other fan: It could show just how much Rosechu means to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I'll- I'll consider it but I'm not making any promises.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' We understand.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(several talking at once)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -decided on that subject?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm working on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' If you actually decide to go forward with that story? Do you think maybe- maybe you could give her a talking penis?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!!!<br /><br />
(laughter from various people)<br /><br />
(unintelligible responses)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ok, I think- I think we've talked enough about that one guys.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I have a question that doesn't involve penises.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Anyway, my question is since we've been hearing lot of vicious lies and slander about this, could you confirm exactly why you've been fired from your job at Wendy's Chris? Cause we've been hearing all sorts of- of crazy things and we wanna know the truth.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmmmmmm... well, firstly, what have you heard?<br /><br />
'''Other guy:'''Well we heard that uh you... we've heard so many things like you helped a small child and you did a Donald Duck impersonation and you scared the child.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... also that- also that is correct but I did not scare the child. The child was tired, I was only trying ta- I was only trying to make the child feel better. That's a little amusement. But I did not make the child cry, the child was already- was just tired.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' So you didn't help them cut their food and... yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I did help them- help them get their food to- by giving them uhh, by giving them bags and a top for their baked potato boat.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris, when will um, the pictures of Zapina, appear on the um, 18 plus page?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that was a deleted scene! That was a deleted scene.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Why was it deleted?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basically, hhh... y'c- y'cant' really have it if you don't have Rosechu working to take the- working to take the pictures of herself up in the bathroom. Cause like can't have one without the other.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaahhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I don't know if this is a good question but there's something I wonder about that- we kind of have this DVD you made and... y'know, we never unfortunately got... but I'm curious um... do you ever plan to release it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I'd pay money for that, I think everyone else here would probably pay money for it too.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Indeed.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (breaking up) I wanna ask a question.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I hear it's also on YouTube.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris do you know that you've influenced the rap/hip hop community?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmh... uh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I just wanted to mention that because I saw some YouTube videos and it- and- and from some underground hip hop artists such as Immortal Technique and they've sampled some of your voice audio complaining about your struggles with uhm... with the school board, with the security guards and they were- they felt so empowered that they actually took those words and mad'em into a very powerful rap song. How does that- how is your reaction to that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhhhh... basically I have not watched those videos so... I don't have an opinion.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I will provide you a link to that, hold on a moment.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh that's ok, actually I uh, did sample one. The one where they basically played the parody from "Can't touch this".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, no, trust me it's waaay more serious than that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I still haven't heard of- heard of what you're talking about.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Nevermind.<br /><br />
(rustling and moving noises)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do an impression of MC Hammer?<br /><br />
(more clicking and rustling)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Can't touch this do do do doo do dooo Can't touch this! Do do do dooo do do do... can't touch this.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' That was- heheheh.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Awesome.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you- can you do Dr. Nick Riviera from the Simpsons?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> HIIII EVERYBODY!<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hello Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hi Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hi Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that should say Dr. Nick cause that's who I'm imitatin'.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''???:''' That uh-<br /><br />
'''???:''' HELLOOO EV'RYBODY!!!!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well that-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hi Dr. Nick!<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Thank you, I love the Simpsons.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do... Peter from Family Guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhenhenhenh... Hey Lois! Look at me! I'm just (unclear) you nose, and I'm eatin' your nose.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh that's dead on.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Oh would you- Omicron's been interested in tis- would you actually make a documentary like- like your other DVD but make your daily life?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... I'm... yeah I might but uh... I'm not su- I'm not sure bout it at the moment.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaaaaaaanh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris can you do Mario? You know from Super Mario?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hay paisano! How you doin' mistah hedgehog!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's very good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then Sonic- then Sonic would say "what?!?"<br /><br />
(giggling)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris do you have any plans to make a video of yourself taking a dump on a Hexbox?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No! That's gross.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Yeah that was pretty sick right there.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Let's ban him.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's bad enough I cut in half with an axe.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> and one of the elevator jokes...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Oh we remember that, that was a classic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And I earned a trophy for that.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmm...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Yeah, I remember that, it was destroying a Hexbox by cutting it in half if I remember...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' If I were to draw nude Zapina fanart, uhm, would you put them on the site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... uhh, your- you uh- free to draw them at your- at your own- own preference, but I will not be- I will not put it on the website because- cause- because I will not want to break any laws of having underage portrayals- portrayals of underage nudity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Isn't Dot a child?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry... what?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dot, from Animaniacs.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' So-uh- uhm- I think I looked up somewhere that um, drawings do not count, they're just lines on paper not like real pictures that are horrible.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah I believe-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Draw-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (cut off)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Those illustrations do not count as child pornography. Because with drawing it's art- it's artistic merit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Welll... I dunno, I guess it depends I have to- but- y'know you could do the drawing and I'll think- I'll consider it.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, would it be possible to get any pictures of Sonichu having anal sex with Rosechu?<br /><br />
(pause... thumps and feedback)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm considering that but...<br /><br />
'''Accented woman''' Who keeps letting this person in? You are very offensive.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -and and, if you draw those, do you think that Rosechu would actually clean Sonichu's penis off with her mouth (laugh) w-when they're done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nah, no, I don't think so, I think- I think- I think it would be unh- yeah w-wash it off with a washcloth.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Do you think then, at that point then they would sell the washcloth on eBay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!<br /><br />
(people talking over each other)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, no, no more potty humor, all right?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah alright, okay<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Unrelated to party humor, I want to ask that in your Springbreak uhh Issue of Sonichu you had an introduction of a, of new character, the [[Yawning Squirtle|squirtle]] and I wanna ask<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:''' (interrupting)</span> No, that's, no, no, no, that's not just a character, I was, I was not introducing a new character, I was just doing like a poster thing for a bubble speak under one, I thought I just draw some water type pokemon un-in there<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I understand but the thing is there is huge cult following for that character and I strongly suggest that you should capalize on that and, and make him to a main character<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eh... No, I don't think so<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's just sleeping Squirtle work- waking up!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, people just thought he was really cute and yawning Squirtle, I don't know, I heard someone say, man wouldn't it be great if he would be that [[Autistic|dopey]] sidekick that he'd come and they'd be like, like, he'd come in and say something silly after someone did something and they would be like "Squirtle"!<br /><br />
People laughing and talking over each other<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um...<br /><br />
???: Yo, it makes you *unintelligible* (Chris and someone talk over another)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yes Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I'm asking you about... Hm... Never mind, I lost my train of thought. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's okay. These guys made me lose a train of thought as well. Doesn't multiple inputs.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yes, kinda lotta control here. I might- I may have to... never mind<br /><br />
Silence<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I never lose my train of thought because I have a GPS tracking system on it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, that was a good joke. (chuckle)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, could you tell us a joke right now. Just any joke.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay, here is a fuck- here is a funny- here is a funny mind scream. Funny rhyme scheme... not to be taken literally:<br /><br />
On your Game Boy Advance SP<br /><br />
create 'yer MII<br /><br />
den play it on WII<br /><br />
with your PSP<br /><br />
hooked to your PS3<br /><br />
cause it's fun<br /><br />
see?<br /><br />
And never ff, and never play a [[Hex Box]] 360<br /><br />
Because it's stupid and you're not a dummy (in childlike voice)<br /><br />
Mock laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That is really good.<br />
'''Fan''': Chris is that something you made up?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I made that up.<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Chris, Chris, can I write that down and tribute to quote you that? Oh man, that's good<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) So you mean to type it up and you quote me on the rhyme scheme?<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Yeah, I'd like that. I've been thinking about making a quote book like a mini Chris quote book like something you could open and have a cool line to say when you're on a party and you're like right things.<br /><br />
People talking over Chris and Alucard<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, well I'm typing it up for Alucard, so...<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Thank you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, can we hear one more?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay well here, okay um, okay here is an [[Christian's sex joke|adult joke]] I once come up with a long time ago.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': This is going to be good!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright- Alright there's this married couple, Bob and Jane, and they've been- they were looking forward to having children. So, one night, Bob comes home from work, and uh Jane says, "Hi, you had a good day, dear?" And he sa- and she sa-- he says, "Nah, it's been a long day, darling" And she said, "Well, it's okay, why don't we go upstairs, and we'll have some Breakfast." And he says, "Breakfast, at Nine p.m.?" And she says, "Sure, you bring the MILK, and I'll get an EGG."<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yo, I heard that before, man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then later, they had a boy and a girl, Junior Bacon and Orange Juice. All Part of a Balanced Breakfast.<br /><br />
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif]]<br /><br />
Perplexed silence<br />
<br />
'''Fan''': Hey, Chris, how do you solve a Mexican tank?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Stand in front of it?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': No, man, shoot the guys pushing at it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fans''': Oh that's a good one.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' I got one.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get a bunch of [[Niggos|blacks]] in a car?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Throw some chicken in.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get them out of the car?<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Job application.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What do you call a beach of black people buried up to their necks?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Afro-turf.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I came up with one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what's the difference between a black man and a pizza?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': A pizza can feed a family of four.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': How do you stop black people from jumping on a bed?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, enough racist jokes.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Put velcro on the ceiling.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enough, enough black jokes.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, uh Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Sorry<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I showed by friend that over 18 site, and he said, that he um, he um, you know he, he masturbated to it. Does that make you feel (interrupted)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's good, that's basically the reaction I would be going for. Among the male ca... among the male population, being attracted to the women.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But those are your drawings, it's like, I think he's gay now. I mean, you're a guy and you drew those.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm drawing, I'm drawing female characters.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yah, but it's drawn by you and you're, like, I don't know. It's kind of awkward for me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris, I actually need to thank you, the pictures on that site, it looked like the camera was inside Sonichu's penis when Rosechu was giving him a blowjob. That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. I've always wanted to have a camera in my penis so that I could see that if I ever got a blowjob, that would be awesome, I just wanted to say thank you very much for that perspective. It's the first time I've ever seen it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': There's a question here on the site, oh sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, well I see it... no I don't basically masturbate to my own drawings.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But you're okay if other people do, right? Even guys?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You're okay if other people, you know, masturbate to your drawings? Even if they're guys, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If the guys are masturbating to the female drawings, then yes, that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I just thought it was kind of awkward, but maybe I'm seeing it a different way.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I doubt that, uh, having a whole bunch of drawings of naked female characters can be misinterpreted as something else.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Can I to ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': One time, a friend and I were looking at porn together, and we masturbated together, but the porn was straight, ordinary porn. Is this gay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I'm sorry, where you looking at naked women?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Yes, but we were in the same room, masturbating.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, if you both were thinking about the naked women you were looking at, then I would definitely say you both are straight, cuss you're not thinking about each other, you're thinking about the women.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Right. <br /><br />
'''Fan''': Would you do that with someone?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': I'm relieved.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Man, nigger you gay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Shut up. Would you do that with someone? Like a guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Nah, I'm straight dog.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I'd, yeah I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Omnicron has a question on here, on the side here.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You see it, or?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. That's not straight.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what about the earlier question.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, the one before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, which one before? Oh, you mean...<br /><br />
(All talk at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, what do you think about-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wait, wait let him answer.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Let him answer that one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was gonna rephrase it but okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'd say it would depend on your interpretation, what is adultery to you?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But, you know, isn't the Bible only supposed to be interpreted, it's the word of God, you're not really supposed to interpret it any other way.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': It is what it is.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's in English.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh, I have no comment.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, that's what my, uh, you know I was talking about my mom saw those drawings. I mean, not the drawings, the posters, the playboy posters and that's basically what she got bad about. She said I was committing adultery.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah okay, if you don't want to talk about it, fine.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, hmmm, I think you shou, I think you should, uh, when you, I think I can see where this could be interpreted one way or another, it depends on how you look at the woman. I mean, alright, you're looking at the, uh woman, you might imagine her naked, but, I mean, you would respe- I mean, you would, you would still respect, I mean, if you were still respecting that woman, you would appreciate her more for like who she was aside or in addition to the nudity, then that's not as bad as just, as just only doing it for the appearance.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's why, uh, that's why the playboy magazines, they give you the introductions of the women. It's like letting you know who they are (unintelligible).<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh but, yeah, but there weren't any, uh, descriptions under the, yeah never mind.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Thank you for the clarification Chris.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris, do you love America?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm patriotic.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's good. I was wondering if you could sing the national anthem for us?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [[Wikipedia:My Country, 'Tis of Thee| My country tis' of thee. Sweet land of liberty. Of thee, of thee I sing.]] I don't remember the rest.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Lands where my fathers died.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Land of the pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
(Fans all start singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Stop it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey I'll, I'll tell y'all a funny joke that's kind of patriotic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, you got this, you got this funny Mexican- you got this funny Mexican guy, and he just, he just come back home to Meh-he-co after an American visit. He's like (high pitched voice) Oh the people there are so very friendly. I mean, I go to the basketball game. I sit in the back row. I sit in the back row. And then, and then, and then all of a su- and then all of the sudden right before the game started, everyone turned around, put their hands on their chests, and they say, "Oh say can you seeeeee"!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I thought you said no racist jokes?<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': Yeah man, that ain't cool!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was a name, it was a name joke.<br /><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''':...Spanish language<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm kind of offended by that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': That's racist dog. That ain't cool.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': You laugh you support terrorism.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ¿Qué?<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What'd you say?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What the hell? Who said that?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Forget it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I said, you laugh, you support terrorism.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, he's gone.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Awful Mr. T impression) I pity the fool, who try and misinterpret things, and twist them around, and then jam new words into my mouth.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You do a good Mr. T<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah you do.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) no jibber jabber.<br /><br />
(Fans laugh)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, did you watch the A-team back in the day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No but, no but, basica- but I have seen Mr. T. And then I also, I also saw when he guest, when he quest starred in an episode of Alvin and the Chipmunks.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I saw that episode, he helped uh Theodore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Theodore was getting picked on, yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, you posted a link here.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well at my [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|Methodist church]], uh, sex before marriage is okay as long as, uh, she and I, we love each other very much and truly.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But that's what they tell you, I'm talking about the word of God.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *Sigh* Okay, I'm getting tired, okay, I'm getting tired here, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, but...<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, sorry, no more of that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, you're right. Please stay Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay. Alright, I'll stay a little while longer.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, if anyone does, if anyone asks anything that makes him feel uncomfortable, I'm gonna kick you out of the room.<br /><br />
(Everyone speaks)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Chris, could you give me some advice?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I have a Japanese friend, he's, he's actually 26 and he's never had a girlfriend and we asked him some questions, just joking around one day. And we asked him if his, when he gets married, if his wife wanted to sleep with another man, would he be okay with it, and he actually said yes, as long as she wasn't being forced. Now that kind of bothered us, because us Americans, right, we think that marriage, and you know you're with somebody, they should be faithful, but he doesn't seem to think so, so I wanted to see if you had any advice maybe on what we could do to try and convince him that his viewpoint is wrong.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, hmm, it's not necessarily that the viewpoint is wrong. See, the thing is, what, to, to quote, to make it accepta- to make it like as if you're actually cheating on somebody, cheating on your spouse in the marriage, it's like not telling them, not telling him, not telling him or her about it beforehand, but it's like, you know, you, it's like you tell them beforehand and you get their approval, it's, it's okay, even if they don't want to be part of it. But not telling them, that's definitely like uh, cheating on them.<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that's another thing I would have to think about, cause, got a bit of a, couple of items of destruction that need to be repaired<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I just got, I just talked to that one friend I was talking about who, uh, saw your website, the 18 one, and it turns out he's, he's gay, he's actually gay and he fapped to, uh I mean he masturbated to, uh, Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hahaha, your friend's a fag.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': And I think he's...<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out for 15 seconds)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ...about that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I think in case you would definitely want to let him know that you are straight and you don't want that kind of relationship, and maybe, and you know<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I tell him just to get the hell away from your site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm not saying that, but like, uh, you know, you don't want that kind, you don't, I mean that's, that's basically confirmed on that note. So, uh, you want, you still wanna be friends but you don't, but you're not into that kind of thing.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I mean, he was looking at your site, like, the 18 site and he was in like, um-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Over 18.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': The over 18 site you made. The loveshack. I thought he was just like, you know, masturbating to Rosechu, but it turns out he was attracted to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *sigh* Uhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, I don't think I'll be friends with this guy anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, yeah, then tell him, yeah, to get the hell out of your house and stay away if you don't want to be friends anymore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Seems like you know too many gay friends mister.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh shut up.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris, you know how-<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's not my fault. <br /><br />
'''Another fan''': You know how cologne or perfume, you know, women wear that to try and attract men? Do you think that farts attract gay guys to each other?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Now that's stupid! Not only is that stupid, but it's gross.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Here, I'm gonna take that question and I'm gonna, I'm gonna take that question and spin that into something that's less weird. What would you say the best cologne or whatever a guy could wear to get a girl's attention?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I recommend [[Axe|Axe]] body spray.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh yeah? I think I tried that one time.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': That actually does it for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What scent do you use?<br /><br />
(All speak)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Don't you use ass body spray?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Mmm, love it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Does the Axe effect, does it really exist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Does Axe exist?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, the Axe effect. You know, they say in the commercials spray it and girls will come to you.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) and it works for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Has it worked for you Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, well, yeah, I, yeah I haven't got that working for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I think it's a scam personally.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I mean... I mean, Old Spice is pretty good. I had, I had like a couple of girls go up to me asking me for dates with Old Spice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I actually wore that Orion sent, uhh, still smelling it. So it will work Chris, you just gotta give it time.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Using the Axe.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Cameron but, isn't Axe spray for men?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': No no no no no no no, see, see I said a boyfriend, a boyfriend that I met.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, okay.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah. *laughs*<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That makes sense.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, silly, silly. I have a question for you Chris, what celebrities have you met?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Well what I'm saying is the Axe effect doesn't work. Okay, sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't actually met other celebrities in person, my real life, unless you count a local radio DJ.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I've met the DJ of my radio station 95.1 and [[Excel Saga|Monica Rial]], and meeting Monica Rial was just a treat.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ahhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was, it was good.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, she's pretty.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Maybe you should go to her and, um, maybe she could be like a contact for voice acting. I mean, you do pretty good imitations.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Do Homer Simpson!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Homer Simpson impression) Oh, look at me! I'm a stupid old person, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp, D'OH!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That was awesome<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Who else can you do Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What other imitations can you do?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, a lot. It depends on if you name it, I might recall, if you name the person or character I'll, if I can recall my memory than I will imitate that person.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Can you try Bender from Futurama?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I reckon I can do a pretty good Bender! I can twist off my arm and, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, um, since my girlfr-(clears throat)-sorry. Since my girlfriend broke up with me, I was just wondering if you could give me any tips to like, pick up y'know, another girlfriend?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) Valentine's Day is coming.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah. It's gonna be lonely without her, y'know.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah I know.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Can you help?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) No I do not know what tha- neither of them sound like in voices so I can't imitate them. (sigh) As for- as for dating advice uh, if you're- when you're going out to meet a woman, and this is like advice that's like it could've been taken from my, taken from my own advice I gave in the, the one in the video I did when I just turned 25. But it was definitely, it was given, but it was offered in this book written by a nine-year-old.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> When you're going to uh find yourself a woman, you just try to stay calm. And uh be polite, friendly. Don't uh let your nerves get the best of ya.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What should I say, what should I say here, y'know, to the girl?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Start with "hello" and "how are you".<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I ask her, should I like do a pick-up line? Do those work?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Um, sometimes. But I wouldn't, I wouldn't exactly count on it in a desperate situation. But I mean like uh, talk about yourself a little bit saying like, "Ooh did you read in the paper today about this article that really caught my eye?"<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was thinking about standing by the wall with a sign. Saying that I need a girlfriend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, don't- don't do that. That makes you look retarded.<br /><br />
(Laughter)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What about wearing a sticker that says you're single. Have you ever tried that? Do you think that would work?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what was that? A stick-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wearing like a uh, a sticker that says "I'm single".<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Wait a second I'm not done yet.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Oh I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I got that idea from your comic. I mean I thought it was a-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. I later learned that that, I already learned from my mother that made me look retarded. (Female fan laughs) To other people, so...<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Ohh. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So I stop- So I stopped- So I stopped doing that a long time ago and, I don't know (what payed attention?)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mm. Basically I'm running from others that have offered such advice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh yeah like John Tesh I remember that in your news dash.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. And also it's like uh there's an expression in my elementary somewhere uh, those who can't teach.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Um, I remember (unintelligible). Um, I was um, looking at um (something), how do you feel about Obama swearing in his book? Even read it out loud in the audiobook version.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hm. (rustling and typing in the background) Hm. Ah, yeah I heard of that, didn't care much, didn't uh give much thought into it so... Uh swearing yeah don't care much for it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': So Chris I was just wondering uh, like can you hear me?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I can hear you.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Uhh. Does wearing that medallion, does that attract females? I was thinking about making my own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) You could do what you want, to try and make yourself stand out. Um... But it depends on if you, it depends on other peoples' point of uh you I guess at this point, um... You might want to get a second opinion. I mean it's not like I can see you over da Mumble and uh say what makes you look okay and what makes you look NOT okay. Yeah, g- get a second opinion from somebody else in person.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What about you, do you think that medallion makes you look, y'know, more attractive to girls?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhmmm. Yeah. Yeah I don't know. I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah I think it looks pretty cool on you. So that's, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well you could try it, see if you could try and see if it works for ya.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Speaking, speaking of the medallion, I noticed you wear it on the outside. Have you ever done any replacing the chain on it to something a little more comfortable?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh no. It's fine. It's fine. I mean I'd say that this uh the necklace chain with the like a pair- like a pair of- like a pair of keyrings with a belt buckle on them.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm. Alright.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris in hentai, the uh guys- like the girls usually say no but the, the guy touches her a bit and she gets into it. I was just wondering if you think that really works, have you ever tried that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh. I'm sorry, could you repeat that?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': I said in hentai, y'know the Japanese um, kinda pornography-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Yeah-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': -usually, the, the girl kind of says no but then the guy starts touching her boobs or something and she gets real excited and gets into it. I was just wondering if you think that really works. Can you just make a girl excited and into you just like t hat?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhh... Yeah I don't think so. I me- I mean in most of the time I'm sure you would probably just, the girl would probably just turn around and slap you right in the face or kick you in the groin.<br /><br />
(Various pained groans)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, you were saying it's educational. I think I saw that in a porn too.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Uh. Also (unintelligible) asked "How far have you gotten with a girl"?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I've never even been on a first date in my lifetime.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ohhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> At this point.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris?<br /><br />
(Fans talk over each other)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I was suggesting uh Chris, I have family in Bristow, Virginia. I've been out there a lot. And you know, they're- I mean, people that I've seen in Virginia don't really like anime and things that much. Have you ever considered maybe trying to meet a girl in the west coast? Because a lot of people, especially universities are into anime culture. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) Yeah but I'm no- I'm not planning on traveling outside of my state. Plus I would prefer to keep it local.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah.<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
(Everyone talks over each other)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but to see the world means to have to have the money to actually go see the world.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Well You just have to save up a little bit.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah. I mean you know, trains are good.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': (strange incognizable noise)<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Gas is cheap now.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': You can meet so many people just going on a road trip or just you know, taking the bus or something I mean it's not too expensive, it's cheaper than a plane- (Chris talks over him)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Yeah, I hear you on that. But I just like, you know, if I want to go on a road trip I'd uh, I would not like to go it alone. I'd like to have my sweetheart by my side.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Mmm.<br><br />
'''Fan''': The point is you could always get a job. That's what I did once a-(cut off)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh.<br><br />
(Fans talk over each other)<br><br />
'''Other fan''': -and I wanted to meet a girl? I got this t-shirt that says "ask me about my large and attractive penis" and I wear that to the mall and it works every time.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Are you kidding, really?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yes. (cut off)<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Well that's interesting. (laughs) I have to meet you some time. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah boy. Uhh, alright, gentleman's clubs um...<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what was that noise just now?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Noise?<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I heard like a (snorts) noise.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Yeah, that was probably me be- because I was like objecting to the uh, when he was describing what it said on his t-shirt.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah that wasn't cool. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': You guys have no taste. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah-<br><br />
'''Guy''': Disgusting!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I know.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay um. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>But it just uh, just it m- just ma- I mean the way I see it, see somebody else wearing that it makes, it uh, it makes- it s- it would appear that guy is only looking for sex and women would be turned by sh- sh- sex right away at that point.<br><br />
'''Guy''': Yeah it kinda sums up (cut off)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Um, so...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um... (Chris and Fan talk over each other) Yeah let me answer this guy's question. Yeah I don't know much about gentleman's clubs so I can't really answer that question. A, and uh... <br><br />
'''Fan''': What about you though, like when you're looking for a girl, does like sex really matter? Like, to attractiveness?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, er, yeah. Eventually the se- yeah. Attractiveness does matter in one point of view but uh, but if you think about it it's like you want to get to know the person, the woman inside as well. Um, so, (I'd rather be in it?) so like uh, we were very close to each other emotionally and like friends, then the sex. Like uh, how Panda and I were very... close.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Hmm.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': What happened to Panda?<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah what happened to her?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't heard fermer- I haven't heard from her in over two weeks and then recently there were, there was the fires in Australia close to by where she was. So I don't know whether she's still alive or not. I haven't heard from her in over a coupl- over two weeks.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': That's awful.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah. I heard it was real bad, it was like a hundred and eight people died from those fires.<br><br />
'''Black fan''': Daaaamn!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but you know it's okay that at least I have uh, at least I have uh, at least I have a good woman who w- who's willing to uh be at my side at this point.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Man... Uh-<br><br />
(Multiple people talk at once)<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': -for the people who are dead?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': So you feel no remorse for the people who have died in Australia?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh no no, I DO feel remorse. Especially to Sarah sh- eh- I mean... I worry about her she's still ali- I worry about- I'm concerned if she's actually dead or still alive.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah I'm sorry to hear that.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I me- I mean, I mean I'd li- I mean I pray every day that she's still alive safe and well. And that she contact me soon.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': But you... you automatically, you basically abandoned her for Julie.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But I did not basically abandon her for Julie.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': That is what it appear- seems like.<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh)...(sigh)<br><br />
'''Fan''': She could be still alive, you never know.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Even if she isn't still alive, take solace in the fact with her perfectly barbequed remains fed to survivors.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> SHUT UP!!!<br><br />
'''Fan''': Um, that was too far, you're going too far man.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. And at this point I care about both- I care about of uh both of them equally. Both uh Sarah and Julie. But it's like, it's like you know uh, I'm uh stil- if she let's me- if she uh gets in contact with me, letting me know that she's still alive, and uhh she...<br><br />
'''Fan''': But I'm letting you know Julie, if she's still alive what are you gonna do then?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': And if people actually did eat her what would you do to them?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> OH SHUT UP!!!! Kick that guy out!<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
(laughter in background)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay um. Uh...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, but you know in all seriousness if Sarah gets in contact with me and lets me know she's gonna be coming my way in real life, and uh-<br><br />
'''Fan''': You're not gonna dump Julie are you?<br><br />
(uneasy pause)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I wouldn't dump Julie as a friend.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh but! Oh...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie I still, Julie I still love you.<br><br />
'''Late guy''': Hello everyone.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But you told me I was your sweetheart, didn't you?<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh hello, Doctor.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm. (stress sigh) Julie I'm going through a- I'm going through a transition right now so it's kind of hard for me to make uh, short watch of what I say at points and y'know answering these kind of questions.<br><br />
'''Fan''': I'm sorry uh, I don't mean to offend you or anything. Well I was just wondering-<br><br />
'''Guy''': (unintelligible) guy Chris. <br><br />
'''Other guy''': Uncalled for. <br><br />
'''Black fan''': Y'know what, don't worry about Sarah. Cause, y'know it usually takes like, like months for a person, like a victim of a fire or a flood of some crap like that, to y'know find shelter and then phone and internet and all that.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': You know, if the place is in a state of emergency, people are getting moved around all over the place, there's people in the hospital, I'm sure she's fine she just can't y'know talk to anyone.<br><br />
'''Guy''': What about Alucard's question?<br><br />
'''Fan''': Wait, yeah.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) Uh, I can't answer that question.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm?<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Why not?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because I'm still in a transition right- I'm still in a transition from Sarah to Julie at this point so uh I can't answer that question right now cause I wouldn't know how to answer it.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': It seems-<br><br />
'''Guy''': So you "transition"?<br><br />
'''Fan''': It's a hard choice, I can't blame you I mean, yeah.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I mean you know what, that's- that's a flat out bad question, I mean I would- I'd be able-<br><br />
'''Other guy''': It's quite valid.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (aggravated) Auuuughh! Okay now I'm gettin' uh, okay now my head's out of order.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Oh.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': I've had that problem too.<br><br />
'''Guy''': It's never fun.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay forget it then.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Uh okay I got, I got one. Impressions, impressions! Uh, can you do one of Bill Clinton?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... no.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Um, Chris? Do you-<br><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh)<br><br />
'''Other guy''': I was wondering do you watch the Boondocks on Adult Swim?<br><br />
'''Black fan''': Aw yeah that's my show!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I've watched the Boondocks.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Did you enjoy it?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's alright.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Can you do any imitations of the characters there, like Uncle Ruckus?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent gibberish) -dem niggers over there! Sing along if you know the words to that song I just made up.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': What was that?<br><br />
'''Guy''': That was, wait, what?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That was Uncle Ruckus. Well I'll tell ya what I sell propane and propane accessories all day long! (begins a high-pitched cackling and squeals more gibberish)... That was-<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Could you do Meowth from Pokemon?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Meowth!<br><br />
'''Fan''': The talking Meowth.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Meowth! ... (cackles again) Aye Jessie, James, we gotta go snag that Pikachu again!<br><br />
'''British guy''': Do you know how to do the Team Rocket song?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, the Team Rocket song er, do you mean the motto?<br><br />
'''British guy''': Myes the motto, the classic one.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Hmmmm... Prepare for trouble make it double, to protect the world from devastation, to uni- to unite all people- o- (sigh)...<br><br />
'''Guy''': ...in our nation!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mm. Anyway... (sigh) Hang on I'm a little mixed up here. Prepare for trouble make it double, to protect the world from devastation, to unite all people within our nation, to debi- to debide(sic) the evils of truth and love, to extend our reach to the stars above. Team Rocket blast off to the speed of light, surrender now or prepare to fight.<br><br />
'''Guy''': ... Meowth, that's right.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': That's right!<br><br />
(chuckling)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Now hand over the Pikachu!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. (sigh)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Oh come on-<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': -than Sonichu, because Sonichu is obviously more powerful than Pikachu!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I will not hand over the Sonichu, so there. (pause) Alucard, stop asking the questions please?<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': Yes Alucard you are very annoying.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah someone kick him out.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br><br />
'''Guy''': Good goin' canine.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
'''Guy''': Anytime. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm. Actually I'm k- actually I'm kind of tired now uh... I'm gonna- I'm gonna head on down now but y'know I'll come back another night.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Okay.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': Well thanks for coming Chris, we really appreciate it.<br><br />
'''Clyde''': No. I've got a few questions for you Chris, I've been waiting.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Clyde no, no, no.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': How did he get in here?<br><br />
(Everyone yells over each other)<br><br />
'''Clyde''': It's important!<br><br />
'''Guy''': Ohh he leeeft!<br><br />
'''Clyde''': No, no, shut up, shut up-<br><br />
'''Other guy''': He's not coming back, give up.<br><br />
'''Clyde''': Tell him it's important it's about Panda!<br><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm digesting her right now.<br><br />
'''Clyde''': That will get him back in, I know it.<br><br />
'''Guy''': What's the important news?<br><br />
<br />
[End recording]<br />
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{{Transcription}}<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 6|Mumble Chat 6]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 8|Mumble Chat 8]]|}}<br />
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==Links==<br />
* [https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBWklfakp0TGdDSkU Download]<br />
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==See also==<br />
<br />
[[Christian's sex joke]] - Used during this chat.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_7&diff=163095Mumble 72012-09-29T01:38:32Z<p>Irisviel: /* 28:35 Chris impersonates various cartoon characters */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''Mumble 7''' is the seventh of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]], held on 13 [[February 2009]].<br />
<br />
Appears to be the genesis for the "Power" videos in which Chris attempts and fails to prove his [[I AM STRONG|strength]] and [[CWC Fighter|fighting]] [[Challenge For Clyde|skill]], though these would not materialize for several months.<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
* A fan talks to Chris about putting naked posters of girls and pictures of men up in his room up to find out if his friend was a [[homo]] as Chris suggested. He tells Chris that his girlfriend dumped him over the posters and his friend ignored all of them. Chris sees nothing wrong with his advice until Julie tells him that she wouldn't like that. Chris recommends sending an anonymous letter explaining the situation and utterly fails to apologize or show concern.<br />
* Fans point out that Chris shouldn't have to show and prove that he is straight.<br />
* Chris cuts a fan off to let Julie ask a question involving [[pedofork|shota]].<br />
* Fans ask Chris to turn his radio down.<br />
* Chris uses Wal-Mart printer paper & RSVP ballpoint pen to draw, and a 50-pack of Crayola markers to color. Refuses to use color pencils or Photoshop to color, saying he prefers the markers.<br />
* Chris talks about Omicron's redone version of [[Sonichu]], accusing him of plagiarism. Says that the difference between what Omicron is doing and what he is doing is that Sonichu is his. Agrees to let Omicron continue if he credits Chris with the copyright.<br />
* '''Julie is convincing Chris to make videos proving to Clyde how strong he is.''' Chris feels that the [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|dildo breaking video]] proved this. Fans say that Chris's dildo comes apart naturally for cleaning.<br />
* '''A fan recommends making a video showing off his fighting moves to scare Clyde.'''<br />
* Chris is asked why he would use a dildo in proving that he is straight. Chris says that he is straight for crushing it, fans call him a [[homo]] for keeping it.<br />
* Chris [[lie|denies]] [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|using the dildo]], and claims that it's now broken. Fan says it could easily be reassembled. Chris is adamant that it was glued and that it took a lot of strength to pull it apart.<br />
* When asked by Julie, '''Chris admits using super-shears from Cutco to break the dildo glue, claiming to use a lot of strength in the process'''.<br />
* Fans discuss [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]]. Chris insists that it was drawn in protest of [[ED]]. He says it was anonymous, as most women have long brown hair and her eyes were censored.<br />
* Insists that [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:AngelicainGod%27sEyes.JPG the Rule 34 of Angelica Rosechu] is masturbating and enjoying it, and is using her hand to do it.<br />
* Chris thinks Billy Mays is on Home Improvement.<br />
* Chris isn't doing anything on Valentine's Day, as Julie is not there yet.<br />
* Chris discusses the the No-Redheads policy in his [[Love Quest]]. Says that redheads don't attract him unless they are not natural redheads. No piercings or tattoos allowed.<br />
* Chris is OK with blue hair.<br />
* Does a terrible Marge Simpson impersonation.<br />
* Chris impersonates Comic Book Guy and Donald Duck.<br />
* A fan presents the possibility that AIDS was sent by God to kill the [[homos]].<br />
* [[Chris and Religion|Premarital sex being forbidden in Christianity]] is discussed. Chris fumbles for an explanation.<br />
* '''A fan pretending to be black says he believes the government made AIDS to get rid of black people. Chris says that that's the kind of thing a black guy would say'''.<br />
* Premarital sex comes up again. Chris compares it to using porn to practice and learn skills for later.<br />
* The fake black fan calls Chris on his comment from earlier about black guys and AIDS. He makes the excuse that someone else said it first.<br />
* Questions on Sonichu start. Sonichu doesn't wear clothes because it's a comic. Chris isn't sure how [[Blake]] sounds. He might sound black, he might sound like Shadow the Hedgehog. The fake black fan asks why the bad guy has to be black, also mentioning [[Silvana]]. Chris says that he doesn't have to be.<br />
* Chris gets annoyed about the pronunciation of [[Rosechu]] as popularized by the Old Narrator of the [[Audiobooks]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't disagree that the Audiobooks made Sonichu more popular that he ever did'''.<br />
* He doesn't mind fanfics that don't portray Sonichu in a bad light.<br />
* The audio goes low in the main chat and a fan has a private, unrelated conversation for a few minutes.<br />
* Audio comes back as Chris is admitting that the [[B-Manajerk]] was black in real life.<br />
* Chris doesn't watch the news, so doesn't have an opinion on [[Barack Obama|Obama]]. He voted for him because he saw a documentary where he saw more of himself in Obama, namely that he was an outcast at one point.<br />
* A fan says that you should vote based on politics, not personality. Chris says that he is a moderate.<br />
* Chris doesn't know what the financial bailout is. He says that he drew the [[Sonichu 8#The Elevator Gags|racist picture]] of Obama based on his father's joke, before he saw the documentaries that made him vote.<br />
* Chris will not agree or disagree with interracial dating/marriage. He would want a white woman, but he would be [[gal pals|friends]] with others.<br />
* He'd marry an Asian.<br />
* It's not yet known if Silvana will be a good guy or if she will lose her [[pickle|dick]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't know what he wanted to be when he was younger, he's just making it up as he goes along'''.<br />
* '''Chris is keeping the name changes in the comics for legal reasons'''.<br />
* A fan suggests Slaweel cursing Rosechu to have a dick. Chris gets upset before saying that he'll think about it. The fans think it's a great idea. One considers a talking penis for Rosechu. Chris says it's a stupid idea.<br />
* Another fan asks about Chris being sacked from Wendy's. He denies scaring the child with his Donald Duck impersonation, saying that he didn't make him cry.<br />
* Chris might release his DVD one day.<br />
* A fan says that Chris has influenced underground rappers such as Immortal Technique, who has sampled him.<br />
* Chris takes requests. Impersonates MC Hammer, Dr Nick Riviera, Peter from [[Family Guy]], Mario and Sonic, butchering them all and tainting our childhood memories.<br />
* More Sonichu questions. '''Chris won't upload [[Zapina]] [[Rule 34]] because she is underage and Chris is worried about legal ramifications'''. When he is reassured that this would be legal, he says he would consider it. He will also consider Sonichu-Rosechu anal sex. Rosechu would not clean the [[pickle]] with her mouth, she would clean it off with a washcloth. He would not sell the the washcloth on EBay.<br />
* Chris calls a stop to the potty humor displayed throughout the Sonichu questions.<br />
* '''Chris denies that [[Yawning Squirtle]] is a character'''.<br />
* Fans ask for a joke. He recites a dreadful rhyme about Videogame consoles. He then tells his awful [[Christian's sex joke|sex joke]]. Fans start to tell racist jokes about [[niggos|black people]] and Mexicans. Chris calls for a stop to this.<br />
* A fan says that his friend [[mass debating|masturbated]] to the [[rule 34|adult section of Sonichu]] and is now worried that his friend is a [[homo]], as they were drawn by a man. '''Chris says that this is what he intended it for''', and they are drawings of women, so his friend is straight. He doesn't masturbate to his own drawings.<br />
* Chris reassures a fan that [[Mass Debating|masturbating]] in the same room as another man isn't gay as long as both men are thinking of women, but he would not do this.<br />
* Chris offers no comment as to what constitutes adultery.<br />
* Chris says that he is patriotic. Asked to sing the national anthem, he instead mangles a few lines of "My Country, 'Tis of Thee". He then tells a 'patriotic' joke that is insensitive to Mexicans. [[Chris and Hypocrisy|The fans call him on his "no more racist jokes" statement from earlier]].<br />
* Chris does a poor impersonation of Mr T.<br />
* Chris says that if you are married, sleeping with someone else isn't cheating if you have consent from your spouse.<br />
* Chris gives more advice on homos and recommends Axe body spray for attracting girls.<br />
* Chris has not met any celebrities, only local DJs.<br />
* Does impersonations of Homer Simpson and Bender. The two sound identical.<br />
* Chris gives dating advice: Stay calm, polite, friendly and don't let your nerves get the best of you. Say "Hello, how are you" and talk about yourself. '''[[Barbara|His mom]] told him that standing around with a sign makes him look retarded. A female fan cracks up laughing and can't stop'''.<br />
* "Those who can't, teach"<br />
* Chris says he has never even been on a date. Rejects dating suggestions from fans.<br />
* '''Chris was close with Sarah "[[PandaHalo]]" McKenzie, but hasn't heard from her in over two weeks. He heard about the fires and doesn't know if she's still alive. When a fan adds that 108 people were killed in the fires, Chris responds to the entire ordeal with [[Chris and death|"It's OK though, at least I have a good woman who's willing to be by my side at this point"]]'''.<br />
* When pushed, he says he feels remorse for the the victims of the fires and is concerned that [[Sarah Cassandra McKenzie|Panda]] is dead.<br />
* He asserts that he didn't abandon Sarah for [[Julie]].<br />
* '''A fan says that if [[PandaHalo|Sarah]] isn't alive, Chris should take solace that her perfectly barbecued remains fed the survivors. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|SHUT UP!!!]]'''<br />
* Chris says that he cares about Sarah and Julie equally and wouldn't dump Julie as a friend. A fan asks what he will do to the survivors who ate Sarah. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|"SHUT UP!!!"]] and demands that he be booted.<br />
* Fans reassure Chris that Sarah is probably OK.<br />
* Chris does abominable impersonations of Uncle Ruckus from The Boondocks and Hank Hill. '''He sings "Don't Trust Them New [[Niggos|Niggas]] Over There"'''. He also impersonates Meowth and sings the Team Rocket song.<br />
* [[Clyde]] enters. Chris refuses to answer questions and leaves.<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
===Chris proves he is straight===<br />
'''Guy:''' Chris!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all! ''[echoes]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'll be damned.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh, Chris-[gets cut off by another guy]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh you know, can't com- it's uh, can't complain.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' How's construction of the site?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' [unintelligible] so Chris<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I...I need to ask you something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yup?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh... I put those posters, of the... Playboy and everything in my room, and uh, one of my girlfriends saw it, and she got mad at me for looking at other w-... other girls, and she broke up with me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh... I'm sorry to hear that. It could-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, she's calling me a pervert. I-I don't understand this.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Did you... did you ex- did you try to explain to her about situation between you and that guy?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I... I did, and I don't think she understood.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... well, you should try, you should, uh, s-... try, uh, you should try wr-, you should tr-, uh, do you know her email address?<br /><br />
[pause]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So, uh Chris-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' A-also, wait... also, uh, the friend, I was talking about, he, uh, visited, and [typing noises] he, uh, he went into my room, and didn't even notice the posters. He just s-sat in the middle, he didn't s...sit in any uh, part of the room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Huh. Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, uh... so, yeah, I don't know. I mean, my girlfriend broke up with me, called me a pervert, said that I shouldn't be looking at other girls, I mean... I don't know what to do now.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well listen, uh, answer my question, do you have her email address?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Umm... yeah, but she won't... she won't answer me anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm... ok, hmm. Here's what you can do, uh... Do you know your girlfriend's... any of your girlfriend's [[Gal pal|gal-pals]]?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm... well, you should try to... like wr- you should write out... hmm... hmm... here's an idea. S- Write a letter to her and send it via smail mai-, via snail mail, but don't write the return address. On it.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What should I write?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just like, you know, like, they, you know, this is... you know, this is... you, uh, you put your name there, and you, it's, and then you would basically explain the situation between you and that guy, and that's why you had the posters up, well that's why you put the posters up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't really understand what was the point of the posters in the first place?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[sigh]'' it's... ''[sigh]'' if he looks at... if he, if he is very interested, if he is, if he was straight, he would uh, look at the women. Very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But he didn't even notice them. He didn't notice any of the posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, then I guess he is a [[Homos|homo]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' W...well, um, he wasn't looking at anything, not even the guy posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Hmm... He's not blind, surely.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, like, what is he, is he like, uh...I don't know.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I don't know either, man. But, you know at the moment I would suggest you, uh, write the- write the letter to your girlfriend, send the mail, don't write your return address on the envelope, and, uh, mail it to her.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Also my mom saw the posters and she got offended, she's like really religious and st- she said that like, uh, you know, lust is a sin or some shit. Oh, like she said, she's like all against the, the uhh, the like, Playboy in my room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, your- apparently your mom hasn't been [beeps] that open minded that time. So, you know, give her time to reh-cover, she'll uh, she might op- she might open up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I don't think that was a good idea though, I mean, w-why did-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -you suggest it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I was trying to see if he, to, I was trying to s-help you figure out if your uh, if your friend was a homo or not.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I know, but, do you have uh, [Fans talking] Playboy posters in your room?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unclear] I'm very forward.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I have uh, poster of some, of uh, I have a poster in my room of uh, some uh, naked girls I got from adamandeve.com as a bonus.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Then, nobody says anything about it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[clears throat]'' Well, I didn't really have too many oppor- too many people in my room. So, it's kind of like in a hard to notice place.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Um, wondering, um, If you showed anyone, wouldn't they be offended?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe, maybe not, [Fan grunts] it just depends on their point of view.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I wouldn't want the same thing that happened to me to happen to you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I hear you there. Uh, just to so just sound clear... Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie, are you there?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ok, uh, would you be offended if you saw such a poster in my room?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''[breaks up]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, What will, what was that? [Echoes]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie'''</span> Yes I would, kind of.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well that's no problem, I can take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, see that's what I'm talking about, I mean...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, that's why I asked Julie right now, because I respect her. So, because she said that she would, I will take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I've been thinking, um...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you have... [unclear] Chris, I don't think you should look at other woman.[sic] In my opinion.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I see, Julie. Well that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I...I respect that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' She might get jealous, I mean, that's what happened to my...my girlfriend.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, that's fine Julie, I respect your, I respect that. Just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey, can I ask you a question? If uh, he's done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, uh, one more thing, um, you know I've been thinking, uh, I don't really think you need, you know, posters and stuff like,<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' to prove you're straight, I mean, if you're straight, that's all there is to it i-if, am I right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think you're right.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I...I mean, you shouldn't have to prove that you're straight.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> You're right.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I m-mean [line breaks temporarily] Y-you shouldn't have to reassure yours-self. You should just be knowing it, and nothing anybody says, should get very, uh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, it's ve-ah-very-but you see, I have like, I have that [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] in my room, it's just, so that like, you know, for in case I have any-for in case I have any random thoughts, on account really, to tempt me.<br /><br />
''[unintelligible mix of chatter from most participants trying to get their word in]''<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I mean, even if they're random thoughts, even if they're random thoughts, if you know you're ''positive'' about it, you shouldn't have to look at anything to make sure.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, usually.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay. Uh, moving on from all this homosexuality, uh, I have one question, uh- [gets cut off by Chris in the background] ...never mind, [fat douchebag?]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey, ah, let Julie ask a question, let Julie ask her question.<br /><br />
<br />
===7:08 Julie asks about shotacon===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, I was watching you on the Internet yesterday and, what's a shotacon?[slightly cut off]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...I'm sorry, uh-y, I'm sorry, you got cut off, what was that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> What's a sho-[cuts off again]-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...What's a...''short''?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Shot-[cuts off third time, pretty obvious she's saying ''shota'']-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dude, shota.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, shota.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ssshhhh...shota?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, S-H-O-A-T-A [sic].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, it's a word he found online.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, [baby?], yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never heard of that word.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I dunno, if you want to look it up, you can probably find out on an online dictionary...<br /><br />
''[pause, and a weary sigh from someone other than Chris]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'll-I'll take a look. Hang on.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I know some Japanese and I think I've heard that somewhere, like in a magazine or something.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, it's some of that Japanese shit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Probably is. Three moments, I'll look it up.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Okay!<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's radio is audible]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Whoops, that was the wrong one. The wrong bookmark.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' S-H-O-T-A.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I know, I just get the wrong bookmark for...place I wi-for like...dictionary-type website that I have.<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's keyboard taps are audible]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uhhh...Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, now that Julie's done with her question, I also had one.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' He has to find what that means first.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, ''I'm sorry''.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Shit, ah shit, I've just found it on Wikipedia. It's, uh, it's a ma-it's a Japanese name. It's a name of a person. In Japan.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Really.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a Japanese name. I think it's-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh no no, I think you're looking at the wrong thing, it's S- S-H-O-T-A-C-O-N.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> S-H- I mean- O-T-A-C-O-N? Shotacon?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's the same thing, just put C-O-N at the end.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I've read it in a dictionary before, can't remember what it means...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, oh! Okay, here it is, uh..."shotacon, sometimes shortened to shota, is Japanese slang of the phrase 'Shotaro Complex'"...uh..."that describes the attraction to young boys or an individual with such an attraction".<br /><br />
''[Disgusted reactions heard]''<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh my god, what the fuck?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' There's lots of sick people. Y'all are gonna get ricked?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Someone from 4 cent garbage came in and told us to look that up, I didn't-I didn't even want to.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess he's a homo...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Don't worry I banned him already.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Um, Chris, Vivian wants to know if you can like, turn your radio down a bit, it's distracting.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yes, please turn it down.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I thought that was quiet enough, here.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, no, the lady'll probably pick it up<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Alright cool. Merci.<br /><br />
<br />
===10:21 Another fan asks about art supplies===<br />
<br />
'''Another Fan:''' Okay, um, I have a question, um, I like to draw—interrupted by mumbling—I like to draw comics and such, I mean I want to start up a webcomic. What kind of materials do you use?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, like, you mean for drawing?<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well mostly I just use like, uh, paper without lines, like, computer printer paper you can get in, like, Wal-Mart, for an inexpensive price in multiples.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then I use like an RES—RSVP-brand pen with the black ink.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh okay, is it like, um, a gel pen or a ballpoint pen or-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like a ballpoint, it's like a ballpoint pen.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What do you use to color?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I use Crayola brand markers.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would like to—I would—I would—I would recommend getting the Super Tip 50-pack which you can also find at the Wal-Mart.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay. I-[interrupted by someone else on chat]<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's basically-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' At Wal-Mart I usually get the 24-color RoseArts. Those are—those do pretty good too.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhh, Vivian, just so you—just so you know, I'm using the microphone that came with Hey You, Pikachu for Nintendo Sisty-Four [sic].<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, yeah no, no offense, but uh, personally I prefer like, colored pencils and shit cause-[Chris mumbling is heard]-they're like easier to erase. Photoshop [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If you want to use colored pencils that's fine, I'm not, uh, saying that you have to use Crayola markers-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why don't you use colored pencils? They're really good, you should try one on like, at least one page, just try one. One page with just colored pencils.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But um, actually, you can—you can scan your drawings and then color—color them in like, Photoshop or something. [rest of chat murmurs in agreement] That looks really professional, and really good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I prefer using the markers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's just that I-I mean—I mean I've tried—I mean I've colored with colored pencils before, and I just feel best with using markers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I have a question, um, uh, the Hey You Pikachu microphone, how does that work on the, you're using that on your computer? Did you say?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah it's just, yeah, it's like you plug it into uh, into the basic microphone jack.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh, yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Excuse me, I have a nice little Plantronics headset.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Hey Chris can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah, hang on a second, uh... uh, Omicron, that's uh, you're basically, uh, you're basically plagiarizing here. You're even using, uh, parts of my original drawings to, uh, make up your so called real ones and, you're just—you're just parroting—you're just plagiarizing-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's dirty and illegal.<br /><br />
[Unintelligible mumbling]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, you said so yourself, you're being illegal. And plus, and plus I'm-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, isn't combining Sonic with Pikachu the same thing?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, but, but but also, look at this, also I'm looking at this site here, it said, he's claiming the copyright for himself, but he's, but he's not. I mean that's like, but he's, he—he says<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' You need to ban him immediately.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, ban him immediately.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh wait wait wait wait wait...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah maybe you should check-[interrupted by loud noise, probably Chris]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well he said that, he's saying that all of Sonichu material is copyrighted by him, when it's clearly not.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah but you use Sonic and Pikachu, and you copyrighted it-<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' He just offered to give you credit-[interrupted by noisy chatter]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean, I put, I mean, yeah but, I mean, I'm talking about the—the Omnicron [sic] guy here, that's like, just put this link here.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh he offered to give you credit-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes that's the same thing you did.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well no no, he, no-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We decided-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No he's plagiarizing MY Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We just decided [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris it's, it's a parody, kinda like Sonichu is.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but he—yeah, but he's saying, he said—he—on his front page he says, all Sonichu material-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah but he's, he just offered to change it, so are you okay with that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> By changing it to Sonichu X-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, he said he'll give you credit instead of claiming it for himself.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, uh, yeah I would appreciate that, that would be better, yeah, if... he changed that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Alright cool.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Problem solved.<br /><br />
<br />
===15:02 Chris talks about dildos to prove his strength===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes Julie.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you think you could tell everyone about my idea? And, since you're going to do it do you think you could tell everyone so they could look out for it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, your idea... um, oh oh oh, yeah, just basically a video of me standing up to Clyde and showing him how strong I am, doin' a few kicks for the camera or something-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, you should throw some punches, show him what you're made of, you know?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Kick, punch, it's all in the mind ''etc.''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I basically... I pretty much did that when I...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Let him talk, c'mon!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I pretty much did - already proved my strength when I... ripped that... ''dildo'' in half.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Foreign-Sounding Guy:''' Most dildos come apart for cleaning.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' C'mon.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but that thing was screwed together at the seam.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok listen to me...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris...<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' Eh Chris!<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ...could you do a like further test of your strength for me?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''stress sigh'' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I wanna see how strong you are please.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...That's fine, I can do that.<br /><br />
'''Other Fan:''' I mean that's ok, you showed your strength, but you should show her your moves. Like show her, like, what kind of moves you can do.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, let me tell you a story about how this'll work, ok.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' See, my, uh, one of my cousins, uh, this guy at school, kept, y'know, picking on him, calling him gay and stuff, and trying to fight with him, and my cousin told him to sss- y'know, one day, the guy said "Hey man, I'm gonna beat you up" and my cousin said "Look, if I show you some of my moves, I'll prove to you I can kick your ass in a fight" and so my cousin, y'know, he stepped back and, he took, uh, he took Tae Kwon Do, and he did a couple moves, y'know? He just stood there for like five minutes just doing his moves, and, y'know, some punches and kicks and... The guy just backed right off; he didn't even want to talk to him any more. So I think that should work.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> All right, well I'll try that. I'll try that.<br/><br />
'''Guy:''' All right. Sounds good.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br?><br />
'''Fan:''' You try- you always mention about how you're straight but yet in your video about you crushing a dildo, uh, doesn't that kinda like, y'know, not help your cause?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, it proves I'm straight because...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' But you have a dildo.<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I got it free with an order on adameve.com<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' But you ''kept'' it and shit. That ain't cool.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' What I don't... Why were there batteries in...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh yeah Chris, why ''were'' there batteries in it? Why did you keep it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I mean...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it wasn't an easy thing for me to sell, right off the bat, or even to make a profit, so...<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In fact in a way it's a good thing I kept it, cause it allowed me to be able to break it, like I did.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes but why would you keep it?<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why would you keep it?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I woulda saved it for my sweetheart, if she'd wanted it. To use it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Aaaahhh.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But if I were there wouldn't you prefer the real deal?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Some things that metal just can't replace.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Yeah.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I heard that.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' You didn't use it did you?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No I did not.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Did you just throw all the ones you had away?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I only had that one. And there you go, I ri- there you go, I broke it apart.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you just, like, ''take'' it apart, I mean, it did...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' ...seem to come apart, like, screwed on...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I did not take it apart, that thing was glued at the seam. I had to put a lot of strength into breaking it at the middle there.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, but I think, um, showing your moves would be better.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Right.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Clyde would mess with you if you show him you can kick his ass.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey, Chris's a muthafuckin' ''gangsta''!<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Blap blap.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yes, Chris will fuck Clyde's shit up.<br /><br />
(awkward pause)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait, Chris, didn't you say you used a - didn't you say you used scissors to break the dildo?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I pretty much did have to so I could break that ''glued seam''.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, I thought you broke it with your hands.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well I- yeah well I would have but it was dang glued at the seam, so I clipped straight in with the scissors I had.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a pair of Super Shears from [[Cutco]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(feigning interest)'' Huh.<br /><br />
<br />
===19:50 Chris defends his Rule 34===<br />
<br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, let's talk about something else. Uh, Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whenever the announcement of the adult Sonichu page, when I looked at your gallery, very nice stuff, you know, I see a picture of what looks like you with a Sonichu, uh, medallion. Like, and, who's that one girl, exactly?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Who, [[Megan]]?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I thought it was, like, [[Crystal]], cause of the hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, it was - it was originally drawn to be Megan but I censored her eyes to, uh, port- to protect her identity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Mmmmmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''(laughing)'' That's stupid! (?) That's so silly.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I drew that after I found the ED page in November.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you say that?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In protest against it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thought you were going to get rid of it anyway.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I tore up the original drawing, I, in- into squares, and I put in in an envelope.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you upload it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you do that shit? Like, and...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I understand Rosechu, but, like y'know, why, like, something that's from real life. That's the problem (?)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's not necessarily from real life, it depends on you inter- it depends on your interpretation, I mean it's hardly- I mean, '''most women have long brown hair, and the eyes are censored''', so...<br/><br />
(laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''Most'' women?!?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I remember in that one video you were saying it was Megan.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because it broke, because it end up, because it the end it broke up my friend - broke up my friendship eve, my uh, friendship with Megan.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um, can I ask you a question? In the third picture, with [[Angelica Rosechu]], what is... what's happening, is... God... doing...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nope. She's masturbating. And she's enjoying it.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But she has no hands there. How's she doing it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' She's ''enjoying'' it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But she does... She does...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah but how's she doing it? She doesn't have her hands there.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> She does have her hands, she's... ''(stress sigh)'' She's... like most women would be able to do the same thing.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thing it's the angle, Julie. I think it's the angle you were looking at it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah plus uh, the picture wasn't, uh, very - wasn't as clear as, like, you know, I would have liked to have had it, uh, I mean, I had that file for a while, and it...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah some of those are kinda blurry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, some deg- some degraded.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ? a good question, have you drawn anything... of... have you drawn anything like that with me? Cause I would actually like to see, if you did. If so, could you, and let me see? I, uh, sorry, that's very rude to ask.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm sorry, let me answer this guy. Yeah, well, I made a retraction video later saying that I- I disowned that address.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ah, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just after that guy hacked into it and changed to it to suck. And as such.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hang on, I'm gonna take a look at that... My Youtube...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I like this song.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What song?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' The song that's playing in the background of, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what do you think of, uh, what do you think of that guy who advertises products, Billy Mays? What do you think of him?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... Billy... Oh! Yeah he's an ok guy, I watched him on Home Improvement.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Billy Mays?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, that was another guy on Home Improvement, Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No that was the same guy. That was the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Really?!? Let's look up. IMDB, go. ''(sound of typing)''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Believe me, it's the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, I really enjoyed your, um, adult, uh, section of the site.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... okey dokey, very good. Aaahh, trying to figure out how to update the link on this thing here. Oh, maybe under here. Oh there it is, thank God (?), update right now.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(singing)'' You spin me right round baby, right round...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (joining in) Like a record baby, right round round round<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's a classic, I can't help in man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There you are, updated. It's finally fixed.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Actually that was Richard Karn on Home Improvement, not Billy Mays.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well my mistake, I mean the guy had the beard and uhh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh yeah I can understand.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And the voice sounds- and the voice sounds the same...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah. They sound the same.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There's a matter of interpretation apparently I misinterpreted so I will admit that I was wrong.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah see we all make mistakes, don't be too hard on yourself.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unintelligible babble or singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you gotten any fan art submissions or notable? For the uh- webpage?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I got one today... It's like mostly a drawing of that uh that uh- of the fan herself.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -got in the snail mail today.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -Sunday.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hmmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What are you doing for this Valentine's day Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhm... I'm sorry, what was that question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What will you be doing this year on Valentine's day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm depends...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ahhh, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm.<br /><br />
Fan: Surely a man of such magnitude as yourself are going to be doing something important, aren't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Magnitude? Way to choose the words buddy.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Vocabulary talent.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, cause I don't have Julie over here yet.<br /><br />
(Reactions of OHs and AHs)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If she was here...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible) -play games.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Or we could just uh... talk.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Ehehehehe. Maybe... uh... why no redheads?<br /><br />
'''Other Woman:''' Yeah?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I was trying to think about that when the other guy asked that question. Uh... I was trying to think up that unh... mmmm... Uhhhh, redheads just don't be very- tract me so much.<br /><br />
Several: Uh, ah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's- it's- a- pi- a possibility that they're dyed.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmmmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But yeah y'know natural redheads enh, yeah, just don't really turn me on as much.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I see...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you thought about girls with um, highlights?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... (pause) aaahhhh... what turns me on hhh- (inhales) (pause) obviously the women.<br /><br />
'''Man:''' Gotta have the women. (?)<br /><br />
'''Guy''': What about piercings or tattoo?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, neither of those.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhhh-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris! How bout like non-orange hair, not like... no, never mind. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... oh... okay... hmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait Chris! How do you feel about blue hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Blue hair's okay, otherwise I wouldna- Otherwise I wouldn't've liked Sailor Mercury.<br /><br />
'''British? guy:''' That is true, she does have blue hair.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' She's a very fine character. There is no way to deny it.<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Blue hair is OFF DA HOOK!!!<br/><br />
<br />
===28:35 Chris impersonates various cartoon characters===<br />
<br />
'''British??? guy:''' Doesn't Marge Simpson have blue hair as well?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (in some kind of insane voice) Oh yeah! Marge Simpson has blue hair and it's as tall as the Empire State building!!!<br /><br />
(Some HMMs UHs and UMs follow)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yo Chris!! Can you do some impersonations for us?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Oh we'd love to hear that!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just did Marge Simpson.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah you're really talented.<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(Several people talking at once)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> -they're really good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Do another SimpsonsChris, how about Comic Book Guy?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Mmmmhmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I'm very indeed. Oh aren't we all promiscuous and whatnot. I like Batman and Robin, oh look! Stan Marsh has come into the thing again - I forget that guy's name, that guy who did the Marvel comics.<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Stan Lee. (Pause) Chris do your Donald Duck impression.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Everybody have fun (incoherent and scary quacking)<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris you should work for Disney.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's good Chris.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Have you ever considered being a voice actor?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Errrrrp... possibly, I'm not sure.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (incoherent, cut off by Chris)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent... another cartoon voice)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris, you're a Christian, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I was just wondering-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahm actu-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -do you just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm actually a Methodist church.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome, I was just wondering: Do you think AIDS was sent by god to kill the homos or do you think that it's just an accident or something man-made?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thou- the thought never occurred to me... thought never occurred to me.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' can you do an impression of Arnold Schwarzenegger?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hold- the question...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Let Chris answer the question.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thought- the thought never occurred to me about what you just said about the AIDS there mmmm... but y'know, it's a possibility and I will not agree nor disagree with it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I was just wondering I mean, I've had that discussion with some of my Christian friends. I just wanted to get your opinion, thank you.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmhhh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think (clears throat) I think Omicron has a point and you did tell me you went to a methodist church didn't you? So that's-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well th- well my Methodist church is uh more loose on- is not as strict on uh- on uh sex.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris I don't know- I don't know that much about religion in the States but I don't think there is a looser Meth- Methodist church. God makes the rules Omicron says.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, hmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well, you know personally I think that the government made AIDS to kill off all the brothers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whoa, whoa... That's what the blacks always say.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. (pause) I'm going to agree, that sounds like something that uh... well, a black guy would say.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So your church is kinda of uh- they let you do- their kinda loose on the whole moral restrictions?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... (pause) uhhh... that's... what's the question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Your church they- you said they're kind of more uh- y'know they're less strict on the whole moral thing, like, as far as sexuality goes? Right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -ah basically.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But y'know, uhh, I thought you're supposed to listen to the Bible or whatever not, y'know, not necessarily- no, never mind.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (interrupts)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, there's also a uh, there's also a- think about this uh, if you uh- if you- if you were a think uh- you have to find for yourself a good meaning behind uh- good meaning behind watching pornography to uh- like teach how it- how to do this and that when you actually get around to doing it...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's all ???<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's all's considered education for yourself.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' How is that realistic at all?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, it's uh- not a really good thing to learn from, trust me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It can be done before marriage as well as long as me and my sweetheart really love each other very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But not in Christianity.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But all I'm saying is y'know, porn is completely, completely unre- unrealistic I mean you can't really learn anything from it.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It gives- it gives you enough ideas.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unclear)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (incoherent) porn.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' When you actually have sex, it's nothing like porn.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe not like you, you not gonna do it-<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' You can't do it immediately- immediately anal sex cause most women are not very happy with anal sex and also...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay, shut up<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' -and also weird-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Shut up.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Yes.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And... that wasn't cool, like...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That was uncalled for...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, like, suthin' a BLACK MAN would say...<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' That's racist man...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, somebody said it on here first before I did.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Does that make it ok?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, I think he's trying to make it clear that- I dunno.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I typically agree with that guy.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So nothing g- it doesn't make it ok.<br /><br />
(incoherent)<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling) I wi- I'm sorry, I take it back.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(unclear)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Guys can we get back to Sonichu, Please?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah this is getting ridiculous.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unclear) -Sonichu actually.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Anyway, my question is that: why does Sonichu not wear clothes while Rosechu and the other Rosechus do wear clothes? And underwear?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Aaaaaaaaaamp... It's like uh- it's basically a cartoon and it doesn't really matter, it's like... mm... think about this: Most cartoon characters wear at least one article of clothing. At least one article. And uh- it's like Yogi Bear who just wears a necktie and a hat.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 35.14)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Other Guy:''' I think it would be cool if all the Sonichus and Rosechus got together and they and- they all formed a big team and they had special uniforms or something, kinda like the X-men.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Or Power Rangers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh yeah, I don't do- I don't do well- I'm not in- no uniforms. It's a uniform and other Sonichus and Rosechus.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'm just wondering if you'd do another impression: What does Blachu sound like? Uh, Black Sonichu? Or Blake?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eeeeuuunh... Eh... ahhhh...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Can you imitate it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... I'm not sure... uhhhhm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Like does he sound black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Possibly, but I'm not certain. I'm not leaning towards it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I'd like to hear it, but if you don't want...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just never- I just never really thought about that. I'd say that he possibly sounds similar to uh, y'know Shadow the hedgehog. But he could possibly sound, black. He could. Don't quote me on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' All right, I was just wondering if you'd do his voice but...<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Hey why does the BAD guy gotta be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never said the bad guy "has to" be black. (pause) I mean, look at the- the range of villanies, I mean there's black and whites and uh... male females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I noticed that uh- Silvana's also... black lookin'.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just decided to color her black because she was born- she came from outer space from a black egg, which was the- which came out of the rainbow.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah, I was also wonderin' about that like-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I- I- I-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' If Silvana came out of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes it's-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Why would she be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' I mean like black ain't part of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like the black sheep of the family. Y'know you put all the colors together and it does become black.<br /><br />
(unintelligible reactions)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -like a brownish-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) is a (unintelligible) color.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Maybe it's because she's from space and there's not a lot of light in space and it's dark or something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah that- a uh yeah- that's one of the-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hmmm.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhm, did you look at the link of my friend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, ummmm...<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Yeah, since you love blue hair.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh- no I haven't looked at it and I don't wanna make Julie feel jealous if I did- if I went and did.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Julie would mind.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhhh...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You look at pornography don't you?<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' (mumble)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, that- that was two syllables "Rose-chu". You don't- don't add- don't say the "e" it's just "Rosechu".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah you went over this last chat.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>(I don't know, it sounds like "narrator")<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sounds like he says "narrator" again)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh... I was just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, well, obviously the uh- the narrator who did those audio books was incorrect. Specially since I never gave that person the approval to do the audiobooks.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think it's just a fan project and I think he-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' and I think he might have one of the West coast dialects. I know that the South they say y'all but over here-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well obviously he lied-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -different. I'd be proud if they made one of my projects into an audiobook though. That means that there are a lot of fans out there that really like it.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Ay.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' They're not selling to try and make any money off it. They're not trying to rip you off. They always made sure- they always narrate the first page by saying "Christian Weston Chandler" so they're not trying to cheat you or anything.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' The people know you're making it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I- I hear that. I just, apparently they misin- misinterpreted the (audio breaks up) name Rosechu. Or mispronounced it. Misinterpreted, mispronounce- fairly the same thing in that situation... possibly. To answer that question... possibly.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uh, Vivian said that the audiobooks made Sonichu way popular that- than you could ever ever do on your own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I will not disagree with the statement. And I appreciate her help.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris. Would you be offended if a fan wrote a fanfiction about Sonichu?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Faaanfiction... if it's- if it's not demeaning or makes them look stupid. Then it's fine- it's fine. (pause) Like I did mind when, shoot, what's his name? That guy... uhhhh... that guy that the uhhhh... did the animations, on his computer.<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' You did mind or you didn't?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Animations???<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think I know what he's talking about. Are you talking about the um...<br /><br />
<br />
(background noise begins)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' Well the original play was a Greek play. Where they're all y'know... Greeks... and crazy stuff happens and they're all runnin' around in togas. So if you ever wanna see the movie "A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum" it was a classic and it had some real classic people from the 50s and 60s in it. Kinda like "It's a MAD MAD MAD MAD World". Sort of a classic old school movie from funny old school world. First color movie type thing. But that'll be a high school play. You'll wanna see that. You might actually enjoy it. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
(inaudible response)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' You never know that might be fun to do. Well I guess that wouldn't work on the weekend then... you gotta...<br /><br />
<br />
'''(FOR THOSE OF YOU WONDERING WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON, IT APPEARS THAT THERE WAS SOME TECHNICAL PROBLEM THAT CAUSED ANOTHER MUMBLE CHANNEL TO BE RECORDED WHILE THE CONVERSATION WITH CHRIS BECAME BARELY AUDIBLE BACKGROUND NOISE. INSTEAD ALL THAT CAN BE HEARD IS SOME BUTTFACE YAMMERING ABOUT FILMS AND TELEVISION SHOWS. I'M NOT GOING TO KEEP TRANSCRIBING IT. CHRIS IS STILL TALKING AND ANSWERING QUESTIONS, BUT NOTHING CAN BE UNDERSTOOD OVER THESE GUYS.)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''(AT 42.56 THE AUDIO SUDDENLY RESUMES NORMALLY)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Unknown person:''' Uh you-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I uh- noticed he's another BLACK villain.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah in real life he was black. Without meaning any offense to the uh- black guy in general, cause you've noticed, among the Jerkops there's uh- we got black's and white's, males and females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(several people jump in at once)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) -you've never drawn a female officer before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well y'know uhhh... uhhh, comic book number 7, near the end. Near the end of the time travel episode. Uhh, I have no opinion about what Obama's doing cause I don't watch the news.<br /><br />
Accented woman: But you voted for him, didn't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes I voted for him because I saw myself in him when I com- when I saw both the documentaries and downloaded them for the Playstation Network between Obama and McCain. I mean voted for a person I saw more of myself of-<br /><br />
Accented woman: You usually vote for someone based on their political leanings, not how you view them. As I were Republican, I voted for John McCain. Not because I liked him but because I- he had the same political views as me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basi- basically I'm a moderate.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh, I see. Um, I was wondering. I was reading opinions: do you agree with his financial bailouts?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm, I don't even know what it is. So I can't disagree or agree.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Well, to make it short um, it's about uh- the government- President Obama is planning to uh- a new one- (cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You got cut off there.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uhh, ok, we lost him.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yo, Chris, uh, do you, you didn't just vote for Obama cause he was black, did you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I did not vote for him because he was black. I voted for him cause I saw myse- because I saw myself in him. In like, similar lifestyles. And I saw that he was a good man, I mean after all, com- I saw- I saw I watched both of the A&E documentaries, before I can- before I knew who I would vote for.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 45.29)'''<br /><br />
<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris:, Chris what did you see in him that you say in your self?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Like for one thing we were like outcasts, at least one point in our lives.<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Wait, wait hold up earlier you said that you thought he would probably paint the white house black.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh oh that was my father’s joke he said that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Is your father a racist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but you see I drew that for him before I saw the documentaries so respectfully withdrew that comic page.<br /><br />
'''???:''' does your father hate black people.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Not necessarily but it’s just how my father just how my father that does not reflect in any way that’s how he felt (annoying ass noise in the background)<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Man that racist.<br /><br />
'''??? :''' Hey Chris I so the ahh saw the Sonichu and Rosechu love sack that you put up and I thought if was pretty cool for (you adult friends?) I just had a question though: do you have any plans in the comic to have romance between you and one of the hedgehogs I mean-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Yelling) No no no<br /><br />
'''???:''' -we would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' I mean is was just wondering because there are fans how would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Now- now that you answered the his question my kind of relates to his what are your thoughts on inter racial breeding and marriages?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would not agree of disagree with them but in my personal preference I would fell- I would feel more comfortable in having a full relationship with a white woman but I am willing- am still willing to be friends and acquaintances and give and have respect for the black women as well.<br /><br />
'''???:''' What about Asians like Japanese?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I’m ok with them as well (yelling) a once.<br /><br />
'''???:''' So would you get married with a Japanese woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hhhmmmm I would have, yes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> but I’m giving Julie to opportunity here.<br /><br />
'''Clyde:''' Julie’s a lucky woman.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris, I was just wondering, is Silvana gonna become one of the good guys, like- like Black Sonichu did before?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There’s a possibility but I have not given that a co- I have not confirmed that yet.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Uh, is she gonna lose the male sexual parts and become a full-fledged woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhhmmm possibly but I haven’t given that- I haven't given that thought either.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Also um I was reading (?Phillip’s?) question, Chris what did you want to be when you were little?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don’t remember, I do not remember. I’m just making it as I go basically.<br /><br />
'''???:''' is there ever gonna be like uh, an end to your sonichu series like a finale?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hmmmm I don’t know, probably would not.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Oh so it keeps going and going?<br /><br />
???: You ever consider making comic about the history of CWCville?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhmmmm an episode dedicated towards that possibility.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris are you going to keep the name changes that you made or are you going back to the original names?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahhh ya I’m keeping the name changes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' But you know umm Nintendo was umm, y'know, they sent you a letter you never really talk about it further.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but at least- at least- the hel- they use to benefit me for the fact that uh allowed me to fix noting in that sense so I couldn’t be sued by such people in that sense.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 50 min)'''<br /><br />
<br />
(scattered reactions)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So the name changes were good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So uh, Chris I was wondering if uh Mary- Mary Lee Walsh Or I guess the new name: Ryam Sla- I don't know-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Sla-weel.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Slaweel, thank you. Uhm, if she were to use her magic to curse Rosechu with a penis, would Soni- what- wou- would that test the relationship between Sonichu and her? While they were fighting the battle to have it removed, I'm just curious.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... Firstly uh, she does not- she does not have the power ch- to do that.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I just thought you know, remember you did the story about 4-cent-garbage and drawing all the- the picture and-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah you what, that's one- that's one thing: drawing them, but not actually putting them on the character.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Cause I think that would be like an epic story though, like to actually have a quest-<br /><br />
Fan: I'll second that.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -to go to have that penis removed from Rosechu. I mean it's a test of romance between her and Sonichu.<br /><br />
(muttering)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And when that prevails and the penis is removed and everybody- everybody lives happily ever after. Y'know that would be awesome.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnnnnnh, I dunno I have to- I dunno I have to think about that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It is a really good idea. I like it.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I do too.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah, that's good.<br /><br />
Other fan: It could show just how much Rosechu means to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I'll- I'll consider it but I'm not making any promises.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' We understand.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(several talking at once)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -decided on that subject?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm working on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' If you actually decide to go forward with that story? Do you think maybe- maybe you could give her a talking penis?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!!!<br /><br />
(laughter from various people)<br /><br />
(unintelligible responses)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ok, I think- I think we've talked enough about that one guys.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I have a question that doesn't involve penises.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Anyway, my question is since we've been hearing lot of vicious lies and slander about this, could you confirm exactly why you've been fired from your job at Wendy's Chris? Cause we've been hearing all sorts of- of crazy things and we wanna know the truth.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmmmmmm... well, firstly, what have you heard?<br /><br />
'''Other guy:'''Well we heard that uh you... we've heard so many things like you helped a small child and you did a Donald Duck impersonation and you scared the child.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... also that- also that is correct but I did not scare the child. The child was tired, I was only trying ta- I was only trying to make the child feel better. That's a little amusement. But I did not make the child cry, the child was already- was just tired.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' So you didn't help them cut their food and... yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I did help them- help them get their food to- by giving them uhh, by giving them bags and a top for their baked potato boat.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris, when will um, the pictures of Zapina, appear on the um, 18 plus page?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that was a deleted scene! That was a deleted scene.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Why was it deleted?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basically, hhh... y'c- y'cant' really have it if you don't have Rosechu working to take the- working to take the pictures of herself up in the bathroom. Cause like can't have one without the other.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaahhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I don't know if this is a good question but there's something I wonder about that- we kind of have this DVD you made and... y'know, we never unfortunately got... but I'm curious um... do you ever plan to release it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I'd pay money for that, I think everyone else here would probably pay money for it too.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Indeed.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (breaking up) I wanna ask a question.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I hear it's also on YouTube.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris do you know that you've influenced the rap/hip hop community?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmh... uh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I just wanted to mention that because I saw some YouTube videos and it- and- and from some underground hip hop artists such as Immortal Technique and they've sampled some of your voice audio complaining about your struggles with uhm... with the school board, with the security guards and they were- they felt so empowered that they actually took those words and mad'em into a very powerful rap song. How does that- how is your reaction to that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhhhh... basically I have not watched those videos so... I don't have an opinion.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I will provide you a link to that, hold on a moment.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh that's ok, actually I uh, did sample one. The one where they basically played the parody from "Can't touch this".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, no, trust me it's waaay more serious than that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I still haven't heard of- heard of what you're talking about.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Nevermind.<br /><br />
(rustling and moving noises)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do an impression of MC Hammer?<br /><br />
(more clicking and rustling)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Can't touch this do do do doo do dooo Can't touch this! Do do do dooo do do do... can't touch this.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' That was- heheheh.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Awesome.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you- can you do Dr. Nick Riviera from the Simpsons?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> HIIII EVERYBODY!<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hello Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hi Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hi Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that should say Dr. Nick cause that's who I'm imitatin'.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''???:''' That uh-<br /><br />
'''???:''' HELLOOO EV'RYBODY!!!!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well that-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hi Dr. Nick!<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Thank you, I love the Simpsons.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do... Peter from Family Guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhenhenhenh... Hey Lois! Look at me! I'm just (unclear) you nose, and I'm eatin' your nose.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh that's dead on.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Oh would you- Omicron's been interested in tis- would you actually make a documentary like- like your other DVD but make your daily life?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... I'm... yeah I might but uh... I'm not su- I'm not sure bout it at the moment.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaaaaaaanh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris can you do Mario? You know from Super Mario?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hay paisano! How you doin' mistah hedgehog!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's very good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then Sonic- then Sonic would say "what?!?"<br /><br />
(giggling)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris do you have any plans to make a video of yourself taking a dump on a Hexbox?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No! That's gross.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Yeah that was pretty sick right there.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Let's ban him.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's bad enough I cut in half with an axe.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> and one of the elevator jokes...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Oh we remember that, that was a classic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And I earned a trophy for that.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmm...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Yeah, I remember that, it was destroying a Hexbox by cutting it in half if I remember...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' If I were to draw nude Zapina fanart, uhm, would you put them on the site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... uhh, your- you uh- free to draw them at your- at your own- own preference, but I will not be- I will not put it on the website because- cause- because I will not want to break any laws of having underage portrayals- portrayals of underage nudity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Isn't Dot a child?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry... what?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dot, from Animaniacs.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' So-uh- uhm- I think I looked up somewhere that um, drawings do not count, they're just lines on paper not like real pictures that are horrible.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah I believe-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Draw-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (cut off)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Those illustrations do not count as child pornography. Because with drawing it's art- it's artistic merit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Welll... I dunno, I guess it depends I have to- but- y'know you could do the drawing and I'll think- I'll consider it.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, would it be possible to get any pictures of Sonichu having anal sex with Rosechu?<br /><br />
(pause... thumps and feedback)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm considering that but...<br /><br />
'''Accented woman''' Who keeps letting this person in? You are very offensive.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -and and, if you draw those, do you think that Rosechu would actually clean Sonichu's penis off with her mouth (laugh) w-when they're done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nah, no, I don't think so, I think- I think- I think it would be unh- yeah w-wash it off with a washcloth.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Do you think then, at that point then they would sell the washcloth on eBay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!<br /><br />
(people talking over each other)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, no, no more potty humor, all right?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah alright, okay<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Unrelated to party humor, I want to ask that in your Springbreak uhh Issue of Sonichu you had an introduction of a, of new character, the [[Yawning Squirtle|squirtle]] and I wanna ask<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:''' (interrupting)</span> No, that's, no, no, no, that's not just a character, I was, I was not introducing a new character, I was just doing like a poster thing for a bubble speak under one, I thought I just draw some water type pokemon un-in there<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I understand but the thing is there is huge cult following for that character and I strongly suggest that you should capalize on that and, and make him to a main character<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eh... No, I don't think so<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's just sleeping Squirtle work- waking up!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, people just thought he was really cute and yawning Squirtle, I don't know, I heard someone say, man wouldn't it be great if he would be that [[Autistic|dopey]] sidekick that he'd come and they'd be like, like, he'd come in and say something silly after someone did something and they would be like "Squirtle"!<br /><br />
People laughing and talking over each other<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um...<br /><br />
???: Yo, it makes you *unintelligible* (Chris and someone talk over another)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yes Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I'm asking you about... Hm... Never mind, I lost my train of thought. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's okay. These guys made me lose a train of thought as well. Doesn't multiple inputs.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yes, kinda lotta control here. I might- I may have to... never mind<br /><br />
Silence<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I never lose my train of thought because I have a GPS tracking system on it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, that was a good joke. (chuckle)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, could you tell us a joke right now. Just any joke.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay, here is a fuck- here is a funny- here is a funny mind scream. Funny rhyme scheme... not to be taken literally:<br /><br />
On your Game Boy Advance SP<br /><br />
create 'yer MII<br /><br />
den play it on WII<br /><br />
with your PSP<br /><br />
hooked to your PS3<br /><br />
cause it's fun<br /><br />
see?<br /><br />
And never ff, and never play a [[Hex Box]] 360<br /><br />
Because it's stupid and you're not a dummy (in childlike voice)<br /><br />
Mock laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That is really good.<br />
'''Fan''': Chris is that something you made up?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I made that up.<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Chris, Chris, can I write that down and tribute to quote you that? Oh man, that's good<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) So you mean to type it up and you quote me on the rhyme scheme?<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Yeah, I'd like that. I've been thinking about making a quote book like a mini Chris quote book like something you could open and have a cool line to say when you're on a party and you're like right things.<br /><br />
People talking over Chris and Alucard<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, well I'm typing it up for Alucard, so...<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Thank you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, can we hear one more?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay well here, okay um, okay here is an [[Christian's sex joke|adult joke]] I once come up with a long time ago.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': This is going to be good!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright- Alright there's this married couple, Bob and Jane, and they've been- they were looking forward to having children. So, one night, Bob comes home from work, and uh Jane says, "Hi, you had a good day, dear?" And he sa- and she sa-- he says, "Nah, it's been a long day, darling" And she said, "Well, it's okay, why don't we go upstairs, and we'll have some Breakfast." And he says, "Breakfast, at Nine p.m.?" And she says, "Sure, you bring the MILK, and I'll get an EGG."<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yo, I heard that before, man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then later, they had a boy and a girl, Junior Bacon and Orange Juice. All Part of a Balanced Breakfast.<br /><br />
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif]]<br /><br />
Perplexed silence<br />
<br />
'''Fan''': Hey, Chris, how do you solve a Mexican tank?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Stand in front of it?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': No, man, shoot the guys pushing at it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fans''': Oh that's a good one.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' I got one.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get a bunch of [[Niggos|blacks]] in a car?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Throw some chicken in.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get them out of the car?<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Job application.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What do you call a beach of black people buried up to their necks?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Afro-turf.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I came up with one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what's the difference between a black man and a pizza?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': A pizza can feed a family of four.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': How do you stop black people from jumping on a bed?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, enough racist jokes.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Put velcro on the ceiling.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enough, enough black jokes.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, uh Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Sorry<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I showed by friend that over 18 site, and he said, that he um, he um, you know he, he masturbated to it. Does that make you feel (interrupted)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's good, that's basically the reaction I would be going for. Among the male ca... among the male population, being attracted to the women.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But those are your drawings, it's like, I think he's gay now. I mean, you're a guy and you drew those.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm drawing, I'm drawing female characters.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yah, but it's drawn by you and you're, like, I don't know. It's kind of awkward for me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris, I actually need to thank you, the pictures on that site, it looked like the camera was inside Sonichu's penis when Rosechu was giving him a blowjob. That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. I've always wanted to have a camera in my penis so that I could see that if I ever got a blowjob, that would be awesome, I just wanted to say thank you very much for that perspective. It's the first time I've ever seen it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': There's a question here on the site, oh sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, well I see it... no I don't basically masturbate to my own drawings.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But you're okay if other people do, right? Even guys?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You're okay if other people, you know, masturbate to your drawings? Even if they're guys, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If the guys are masturbating to the female drawings, then yes, that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I just thought it was kind of awkward, but maybe I'm seeing it a different way.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I doubt that, uh, having a whole bunch of drawings of naked female characters can be misinterpreted as something else.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Can I to ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': One time, a friend and I were looking at porn together, and we masturbated together, but the porn was straight, ordinary porn. Is this gay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I'm sorry, where you looking at naked women?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Yes, but we were in the same room, masturbating.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, if you both were thinking about the naked women you were looking at, then I would definitely say you both are straight, cuss you're not thinking about each other, you're thinking about the women.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Right. <br /><br />
'''Fan''': Would you do that with someone?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': I'm relieved.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Man, nigger you gay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Shut up. Would you do that with someone? Like a guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Nah, I'm straight dog.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I'd, yeah I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Omnicron has a question on here, on the side here.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You see it, or?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. That's not straight.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what about the earlier question.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, the one before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, which one before? Oh, you mean...<br /><br />
(All talk at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, what do you think about-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wait, wait let him answer.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Let him answer that one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was gonna rephrase it but okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'd say it would depend on your interpretation, what is adultery to you?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But, you know, isn't the Bible only supposed to be interpreted, it's the word of God, you're not really supposed to interpret it any other way.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': It is what it is.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's in English.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh, I have no comment.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, that's what my, uh, you know I was talking about my mom saw those drawings. I mean, not the drawings, the posters, the playboy posters and that's basically what she got bad about. She said I was committing adultery.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah okay, if you don't want to talk about it, fine.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, hmmm, I think you shou, I think you should, uh, when you, I think I can see where this could be interpreted one way or another, it depends on how you look at the woman. I mean, alright, you're looking at the, uh woman, you might imagine her naked, but, I mean, you would respe- I mean, you would, you would still respect, I mean, if you were still respecting that woman, you would appreciate her more for like who she was aside or in addition to the nudity, then that's not as bad as just, as just only doing it for the appearance.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's why, uh, that's why the playboy magazines, they give you the introductions of the women. It's like letting you know who they are (unintelligible).<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh but, yeah, but there weren't any, uh, descriptions under the, yeah never mind.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Thank you for the clarification Chris.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris, do you love America?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm patriotic.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's good. I was wondering if you could sing the national anthem for us?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [[Wikipedia:My Country, 'Tis of Thee| My country tis' of thee. Sweet land of liberty. Of thee, of thee I sing.]] I don't remember the rest.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Lands where my fathers died.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Land of the pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
(Fans all start singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Stop it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey I'll, I'll tell y'all a funny joke that's kind of patriotic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, you got this, you got this funny Mexican- you got this funny Mexican guy, and he just, he just come back home to Meh-he-co after an American visit. He's like (high pitched voice) Oh the people there are so very friendly. I mean, I go to the basketball game. I sit in the back row. I sit in the back row. And then, and then, and then all of a su- and then all of the sudden right before the game started, everyone turned around, put their hands on their chests, and they say, "Oh say can you seeeeee"!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I thought you said no racist jokes?<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': Yeah man, that ain't cool!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was a name, it was a name joke.<br /><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''':...Spanish language<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm kind of offended by that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': That's racist dog. That ain't cool.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': You laugh you support terrorism.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ¿Qué?<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What'd you say?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What the hell? Who said that?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Forget it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I said, you laugh, you support terrorism.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, he's gone.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Awful Mr. T impression) I pity the fool, who try and misinterpret things, and twist them around, and then jam new words into my mouth.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You do a good Mr. T<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah you do.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) no jibber jabber.<br /><br />
(Fans laugh)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, did you watch the A-team back in the day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No but, no but, basica- but I have seen Mr. T. And then I also, I also saw when he guest, when he quest starred in an episode of Alvin and the Chipmunks.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I saw that episode, he helped uh Theodore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Theodore was getting picked on, yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, you posted a link here.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well at my [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|Methodist church]], uh, sex before marriage is okay as long as, uh, she and I, we love each other very much and truly.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But that's what they tell you, I'm talking about the word of God.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *Sigh* Okay, I'm getting tired, okay, I'm getting tired here, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, but...<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, sorry, no more of that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, you're right. Please stay Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay. Alright, I'll stay a little while longer.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, if anyone does, if anyone asks anything that makes him feel uncomfortable, I'm gonna kick you out of the room.<br /><br />
(Everyone speaks)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Chris, could you give me some advice?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I have a Japanese friend, he's, he's actually 26 and he's never had a girlfriend and we asked him some questions, just joking around one day. And we asked him if his, when he gets married, if his wife wanted to sleep with another man, would he be okay with it, and he actually said yes, as long as she wasn't being forced. Now that kind of bothered us, because us Americans, right, we think that marriage, and you know you're with somebody, they should be faithful, but he doesn't seem to think so, so I wanted to see if you had any advice maybe on what we could do to try and convince him that his viewpoint is wrong.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, hmm, it's not necessarily that the viewpoint is wrong. See, the thing is, what, to, to quote, to make it accepta- to make it like as if you're actually cheating on somebody, cheating on your spouse in the marriage, it's like not telling them, not telling him, not telling him or her about it beforehand, but it's like, you know, you, it's like you tell them beforehand and you get their approval, it's, it's okay, even if they don't want to be part of it. But not telling them, that's definitely like uh, cheating on them.<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that's another thing I would have to think about, cause, got a bit of a, couple of items of destruction that need to be repaired<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I just got, I just talked to that one friend I was talking about who, uh, saw your website, the 18 one, and it turns out he's, he's gay, he's actually gay and he fapped to, uh I mean he masturbated to, uh, Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hahaha, your friend's a fag.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': And I think he's...<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out for 15 seconds)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ...about that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I think in case you would definitely want to let him know that you are straight and you don't want that kind of relationship, and maybe, and you know<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I tell him just to get the hell away from your site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm not saying that, but like, uh, you know, you don't want that kind, you don't, I mean that's, that's basically confirmed on that note. So, uh, you want, you still wanna be friends but you don't, but you're not into that kind of thing.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I mean, he was looking at your site, like, the 18 site and he was in like, um-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Over 18.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': The over 18 site you made. The loveshack. I thought he was just like, you know, masturbating to Rosechu, but it turns out he was attracted to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *sigh* Uhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, I don't think I'll be friends with this guy anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, yeah, then tell him, yeah, to get the hell out of your house and stay away if you don't want to be friends anymore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Seems like you know too many gay friends mister.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh shut up.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris, you know how-<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's not my fault. <br /><br />
'''Another fan''': You know how cologne or perfume, you know, women wear that to try and attract men? Do you think that farts attract gay guys to each other?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Now that's stupid! Not only is that stupid, but it's gross.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Here, I'm gonna take that question and I'm gonna, I'm gonna take that question and spin that into something that's less weird. What would you say the best cologne or whatever a guy could wear to get a girl's attention?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I recommend [[Axe|Axe]] body spray.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh yeah? I think I tried that one time.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': That actually does it for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What scent do you use?<br /><br />
(All speak)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Don't you use ass body spray?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Mmm, love it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Does the Axe effect, does it really exist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Does Axe exist?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, the Axe effect. You know, they say in the commercials spray it and girls will come to you.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) and it works for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Has it worked for you Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, well, yeah, I, yeah I haven't got that working for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I think it's a scam personally.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I mean... I mean, Old Spice is pretty good. I had, I had like a couple of girls go up to me asking me for dates with Old Spice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I actually wore that Orion sent, uhh, still smelling it. So it will work Chris, you just gotta give it time.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Using the Axe.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Cameron but, isn't Axe spray for men?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': No no no no no no no, see, see I said a boyfriend, a boyfriend that I met.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, okay.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah. *laughs*<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That makes sense.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, silly, silly. I have a question for you Chris, what celebrities have you met?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Well what I'm saying is the Axe effect doesn't work. Okay, sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't actually met other celebrities in person, my real life, unless you count a local radio DJ.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I've met the DJ of my radio station 95.1 and [[Excel Saga|Monica Rial]], and meeting Monica Rial was just a treat.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ahhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was, it was good.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, she's pretty.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Maybe you should go to her and, um, maybe she could be like a contact for voice acting. I mean, you do pretty good imitations.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Do Homer Simpson!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Homer Simpson impression) Oh, look at me! I'm a stupid old person, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp, D'OH!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That was awesome<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Who else can you do Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What other imitations can you do?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, a lot. It depends on if you name it, I might recall, if you name the person or character I'll, if I can recall my memory than I will imitate that person.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Can you try Bender from Futurama?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I reckon I can do a pretty good Bender! I can twist off my arm and, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, um, since my girlfr-(clears throat)-sorry. Since my girlfriend broke up with me, I was just wondering if you could give me any tips to like, pick up y'know, another girlfriend?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) Valentine's Day is coming.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah. It's gonna be lonely without her, y'know.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah I know.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Can you help?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) No I do not know what tha- neither of them sound like in voices so I can't imitate them. (sigh) As for- as for dating advice uh, if you're- when you're going out to meet a woman, and this is like advice that's like it could've been taken from my, taken from my own advice I gave in the, the one in the video I did when I just turned 25. But it was definitely, it was given, but it was offered in this book written by a nine-year-old.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> When you're going to uh find yourself a woman, you just try to stay calm. And uh be polite, friendly. Don't uh let your nerves get the best of ya.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What should I say, what should I say here, y'know, to the girl?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Start with "hello" and "how are you".<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I ask her, should I like do a pick-up line? Do those work?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Um, sometimes. But I wouldn't, I wouldn't exactly count on it in a desperate situation. But I mean like uh, talk about yourself a little bit saying like, "Ooh did you read in the paper today about this article that really caught my eye?"<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was thinking about standing by the wall with a sign. Saying that I need a girlfriend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, don't- don't do that. That makes you look retarded.<br /><br />
(Laughter)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What about wearing a sticker that says you're single. Have you ever tried that? Do you think that would work?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what was that? A stick-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wearing like a uh, a sticker that says "I'm single".<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Wait a second I'm not done yet.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Oh I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I got that idea from your comic. I mean I thought it was a-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. I later learned that that, I already learned from my mother that made me look retarded. (Female fan laughs) To other people, so...<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Ohh. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So I stop- So I stopped- So I stopped doing that a long time ago and, I don't know (what payed attention?)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mm. Basically I'm running from others that have offered such advice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh yeah like John Tesh I remember that in your news dash.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. And also it's like uh there's an expression in my elementary somewhere uh, those who can't teach.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Um, I remember (unintelligible). Um, I was um, looking at um (something), how do you feel about Obama swearing in his book? Even read it out loud in the audiobook version.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hm. (rustling and typing in the background) Hm. Ah, yeah I heard of that, didn't care much, didn't uh give much thought into it so... Uh swearing yeah don't care much for it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': So Chris I was just wondering uh, like can you hear me?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I can hear you.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Uhh. Does wearing that medallion, does that attract females? I was thinking about making my own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) You could do what you want, to try and make yourself stand out. Um... But it depends on if you, it depends on other peoples' point of uh you I guess at this point, um... You might want to get a second opinion. I mean it's not like I can see you over da Mumble and uh say what makes you look okay and what makes you look NOT okay. Yeah, g- get a second opinion from somebody else in person.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What about you, do you think that medallion makes you look, y'know, more attractive to girls?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhmmm. Yeah. Yeah I don't know. I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah I think it looks pretty cool on you. So that's, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well you could try it, see if you could try and see if it works for ya.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Speaking, speaking of the medallion, I noticed you wear it on the outside. Have you ever done any replacing the chain on it to something a little more comfortable?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh no. It's fine. It's fine. I mean I'd say that this uh the necklace chain with the like a pair- like a pair of- like a pair of keyrings with a belt buckle on them.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm. Alright.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris in hentai, the uh guys- like the girls usually say no but the, the guy touches her a bit and she gets into it. I was just wondering if you think that really works, have you ever tried that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh. I'm sorry, could you repeat that?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': I said in hentai, y'know the Japanese um, kinda pornography-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Yeah-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': -usually, the, the girl kind of says no but then the guy starts touching her boobs or something and she gets real excited and gets into it. I was just wondering if you think that really works. Can you just make a girl excited and into you just like t hat?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhh... Yeah I don't think so. I me- I mean in most of the time I'm sure you would probably just, the girl would probably just turn around and slap you right in the face or kick you in the groin.<br /><br />
(Various pained groans)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, you were saying it's educational. I think I saw that in a porn too.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Uh. Also (unintelligible) asked "How far have you gotten with a girl"?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I've never even been on a first date in my lifetime.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ohhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> At this point.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris?<br /><br />
(Fans talk over each other)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I was suggesting uh Chris, I have family in Bristow, Virginia. I've been out there a lot. And you know, they're- I mean, people that I've seen in Virginia don't really like anime and things that much. Have you ever considered maybe trying to meet a girl in the west coast? Because a lot of people, especially universities are into anime culture. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) Yeah but I'm no- I'm not planning on traveling outside of my state. Plus I would prefer to keep it local.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah.<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
(Everyone talks over each other)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but to see the world means to have to have the money to actually go see the world.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Well You just have to save up a little bit.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah. I mean you know, trains are good.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': (strange incognizable noise)<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Gas is cheap now.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': You can meet so many people just going on a road trip or just you know, taking the bus or something I mean it's not too expensive, it's cheaper than a plane- (Chris talks over him)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Yeah, I hear you on that. But I just like, you know, if I want to go on a road trip I'd uh, I would not like to go it alone. I'd like to have my sweetheart by my side.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Mmm.<br><br />
'''Fan''': The point is you could always get a job. That's what I did once a-(cut off)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh.<br><br />
(Fans talk over each other)<br><br />
'''Other fan''': -and I wanted to meet a girl? I got this t-shirt that says "ask me about my large and attractive penis" and I wear that to the mall and it works every time.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Are you kidding, really?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yes. (cut off)<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Well that's interesting. (laughs) I have to meet you some time. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah boy. Uhh, alright, gentleman's clubs um...<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what was that noise just now?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Noise?<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I heard like a (snorts) noise.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Yeah, that was probably me be- because I was like objecting to the uh, when he was describing what it said on his t-shirt.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah that wasn't cool. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': You guys have no taste. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah-<br><br />
'''Guy''': Disgusting!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I know.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay um. <br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>But it just uh, just it m- just ma- I mean the way I see it, see somebody else wearing that it makes, it uh, it makes- it s- it would appear that guy is only looking for sex and women would be turned by sh- sh- sex right away at that point.<br><br />
'''Guy''': Yeah it kinda sums up (cut off)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Um, so...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um... (Chris and Fan talk over each other) Yeah let me answer this guy's question. Yeah I don't know much about gentleman's clubs so I can't really answer that question. A, and uh... <br><br />
'''Fan''': What about you though, like when you're looking for a girl, does like sex really matter? Like, to attractiveness?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, er, yeah. Eventually the se- yeah. Attractiveness does matter in one point of view but uh, but if you think about it it's like you want to get to know the person, the woman inside as well. Um, so, (I'd rather be in it?) so like uh, we were very close to each other emotionally and like friends, then the sex. Like uh, how Panda and I were very... close.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Hmm.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': What happened to Panda?<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah what happened to her?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't heard fermer- I haven't heard from her in over two weeks and then recently there were, there was the fires in Australia close to by where she was. So I don't know whether she's still alive or not. I haven't heard from her in over a coupl- over two weeks.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': That's awful.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah. I heard it was real bad, it was like a hundred and eight people died from those fires.<br><br />
'''Black fan''': Daaaamn!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but you know it's okay that at least I have uh, at least I have uh, at least I have a good woman who w- who's willing to uh be at my side at this point.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Man... Uh-<br><br />
(Multiple people talk at once)<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': -for the people who are dead?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': So you feel no remorse for the people who have died in Australia?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh no no, I DO feel remorse. Especially to Sarah sh- eh- I mean... I worry about her she's still ali- I worry about- I'm concerned if she's actually dead or still alive.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah I'm sorry to hear that.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I me- I mean, I mean I'd li- I mean I pray every day that she's still alive safe and well. And that she contact me soon.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': But you... you automatically, you basically abandoned her for Julie.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But I did not basically abandon her for Julie.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': That is what it appear- seems like.<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh)...(sigh)<br><br />
'''Fan''': She could be still alive, you never know.<br><br />
'''Other fan''': Even if she isn't still alive, take solace in the fact with her perfectly barbequed remains fed to survivors.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> SHUT UP!!!<br><br />
'''Fan''': Um, that was too far, you're going too far man.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. And at this point I care about both- I care about of uh both of them equally. Both uh Sarah and Julie. But it's like, it's like you know uh, I'm uh stil- if she let's me- if she uh gets in contact with me, letting me know that she's still alive, and uhh she...<br><br />
'''Fan''': But I'm letting you know Julie, if she's still alive what are you gonna do then?<br><br />
'''Other fan''': And if people actually did eat her what would you do to them?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> OH SHUT UP!!!! Kick that guy out!<br><br />
(pause)<br><br />
(laughter in background)<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay um. Uh...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, but you know in all seriousness if Sarah gets in contact with me and lets me know she's gonna be coming my way in real life, and uh-<br><br />
'''Fan''': You're not gonna dump Julie are you?<br><br />
(uneasy pause)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I wouldn't dump Julie as a friend.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh but! Oh...<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie I still, Julie I still love you.<br><br />
'''Late guy''': Hello everyone.<br><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But you told me I was your sweetheart, didn't you?<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh hello, Doctor.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm. (stress sigh) Julie I'm going through a- I'm going through a transition right now so it's kind of hard for me to make uh, short watch of what I say at points and y'know answering these kind of questions.<br><br />
'''Fan''': I'm sorry uh, I don't mean to offend you or anything. Well I was just wondering-<br><br />
'''Guy''': (unintelligible) guy Chris. <br><br />
'''Other guy''': Uncalled for. <br><br />
'''Black fan''': Y'know what, don't worry about Sarah. Cause, y'know it usually takes like, like months for a person, like a victim of a fire or a flood of some crap like that, to y'know find shelter and then phone and internet and all that.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': You know, if the place is in a state of emergency, people are getting moved around all over the place, there's people in the hospital, I'm sure she's fine she just can't y'know talk to anyone.<br><br />
'''Guy''': What about Alucard's question?<br><br />
'''Fan''': Wait, yeah.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) Uh, I can't answer that question.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm?<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Why not?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because I'm still in a transition right- I'm still in a transition from Sarah to Julie at this point so uh I can't answer that question right now cause I wouldn't know how to answer it.<br><br />
'''Accented woman''': It seems-<br><br />
'''Guy''': So you "transition"?<br><br />
'''Fan''': It's a hard choice, I can't blame you I mean, yeah.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I mean you know what, that's- that's a flat out bad question, I mean I would- I'd be able-<br><br />
'''Other guy''': It's quite valid.<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (aggravated) Auuuughh! Okay now I'm gettin' uh, okay now my head's out of order.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Oh.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': I've had that problem too.<br><br />
'''Guy''': It's never fun.<br><br />
'''Fan''': Okay forget it then.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Uh okay I got, I got one. Impressions, impressions! Uh, can you do one of Bill Clinton?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... no.<br><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Um, Chris? Do you-<br><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh)<br><br />
'''Other guy''': I was wondering do you watch the Boondocks on Adult Swim?<br><br />
'''Black fan''': Aw yeah that's my show!<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I've watched the Boondocks.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Did you enjoy it?<br><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's alright.<br><br />
'''Other guy''': Can you do any imitations of the characters there, like Uncle Ruckus?<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
(transcribing end for now at 1:39:15)<br /><br />
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<br />
{{Transcription}}<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 6|Mumble Chat 6]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 8|Mumble Chat 8]]|}}<br />
<br />
==Links==<br />
* [https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBWklfakp0TGdDSkU Download]<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
<br />
[[Christian's sex joke]] - Used during this chat.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_7&diff=163094Mumble 72012-09-29T00:32:10Z<p>Irisviel: /* 28:35 Chris impersonates various cartoon characters */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''Mumble 7''' is the seventh of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]], held on 13 [[February 2009]].<br />
<br />
Appears to be the genesis for the "Power" videos in which Chris attempts and fails to prove his [[I AM STRONG|strength]] and [[CWC Fighter|fighting]] [[Challenge For Clyde|skill]], though these would not materialize for several months.<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
* A fan talks to Chris about putting naked posters of girls and pictures of men up in his room up to find out if his friend was a [[homo]] as Chris suggested. He tells Chris that his girlfriend dumped him over the posters and his friend ignored all of them. Chris sees nothing wrong with his advice until Julie tells him that she wouldn't like that. Chris recommends sending an anonymous letter explaining the situation and utterly fails to apologize or show concern.<br />
* Fans point out that Chris shouldn't have to show and prove that he is straight.<br />
* Chris cuts a fan off to let Julie ask a question involving [[pedofork|shota]].<br />
* Fans ask Chris to turn his radio down.<br />
* Chris uses Wal-Mart printer paper & RSVP ballpoint pen to draw, and a 50-pack of Crayola markers to color. Refuses to use color pencils or Photoshop to color, saying he prefers the markers.<br />
* Chris talks about Omicron's redone version of [[Sonichu]], accusing him of plagiarism. Says that the difference between what Omicron is doing and what he is doing is that Sonichu is his. Agrees to let Omicron continue if he credits Chris with the copyright.<br />
* '''Julie is convincing Chris to make videos proving to Clyde how strong he is.''' Chris feels that the [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|dildo breaking video]] proved this. Fans say that Chris's dildo comes apart naturally for cleaning.<br />
* '''A fan recommends making a video showing off his fighting moves to scare Clyde.'''<br />
* Chris is asked why he would use a dildo in proving that he is straight. Chris says that he is straight for crushing it, fans call him a [[homo]] for keeping it.<br />
* Chris [[lie|denies]] [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|using the dildo]], and claims that it's now broken. Fan says it could easily be reassembled. Chris is adamant that it was glued and that it took a lot of strength to pull it apart.<br />
* When asked by Julie, '''Chris admits using super-shears from Cutco to break the dildo glue, claiming to use a lot of strength in the process'''.<br />
* Fans discuss [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]]. Chris insists that it was drawn in protest of [[ED]]. He says it was anonymous, as most women have long brown hair and her eyes were censored.<br />
* Insists that [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:AngelicainGod%27sEyes.JPG the Rule 34 of Angelica Rosechu] is masturbating and enjoying it, and is using her hand to do it.<br />
* Chris thinks Billy Mays is on Home Improvement.<br />
* Chris isn't doing anything on Valentine's Day, as Julie is not there yet.<br />
* Chris discusses the the No-Redheads policy in his [[Love Quest]]. Says that redheads don't attract him unless they are not natural redheads. No piercings or tattoos allowed.<br />
* Chris is OK with blue hair.<br />
* Does a terrible Marge Simpson impersonation.<br />
* Chris impersonates Comic Book Guy and Donald Duck.<br />
* A fan presents the possibility that AIDS was sent by God to kill the [[homos]].<br />
* [[Chris and Religion|Premarital sex being forbidden in Christianity]] is discussed. Chris fumbles for an explanation.<br />
* '''A fan pretending to be black says he believes the government made AIDS to get rid of black people. Chris says that that's the kind of thing a black guy would say'''.<br />
* Premarital sex comes up again. Chris compares it to using porn to practice and learn skills for later.<br />
* The fake black fan calls Chris on his comment from earlier about black guys and AIDS. He makes the excuse that someone else said it first.<br />
* Questions on Sonichu start. Sonichu doesn't wear clothes because it's a comic. Chris isn't sure how [[Blake]] sounds. He might sound black, he might sound like Shadow the Hedgehog. The fake black fan asks why the bad guy has to be black, also mentioning [[Silvana]]. Chris says that he doesn't have to be.<br />
* Chris gets annoyed about the pronunciation of [[Rosechu]] as popularized by the Old Narrator of the [[Audiobooks]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't disagree that the Audiobooks made Sonichu more popular that he ever did'''.<br />
* He doesn't mind fanfics that don't portray Sonichu in a bad light.<br />
* The audio goes low in the main chat and a fan has a private, unrelated conversation for a few minutes.<br />
* Audio comes back as Chris is admitting that the [[B-Manajerk]] was black in real life.<br />
* Chris doesn't watch the news, so doesn't have an opinion on [[Barack Obama|Obama]]. He voted for him because he saw a documentary where he saw more of himself in Obama, namely that he was an outcast at one point.<br />
* A fan says that you should vote based on politics, not personality. Chris says that he is a moderate.<br />
* Chris doesn't know what the financial bailout is. He says that he drew the [[Sonichu 8#The Elevator Gags|racist picture]] of Obama based on his father's joke, before he saw the documentaries that made him vote.<br />
* Chris will not agree or disagree with interracial dating/marriage. He would want a white woman, but he would be [[gal pals|friends]] with others.<br />
* He'd marry an Asian.<br />
* It's not yet known if Silvana will be a good guy or if she will lose her [[pickle|dick]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't know what he wanted to be when he was younger, he's just making it up as he goes along'''.<br />
* '''Chris is keeping the name changes in the comics for legal reasons'''.<br />
* A fan suggests Slaweel cursing Rosechu to have a dick. Chris gets upset before saying that he'll think about it. The fans think it's a great idea. One considers a talking penis for Rosechu. Chris says it's a stupid idea.<br />
* Another fan asks about Chris being sacked from Wendy's. He denies scaring the child with his Donald Duck impersonation, saying that he didn't make him cry.<br />
* Chris might release his DVD one day.<br />
* A fan says that Chris has influenced underground rappers such as Immortal Technique, who has sampled him.<br />
* Chris takes requests. Impersonates MC Hammer, Dr Nick Riviera, Peter from [[Family Guy]], Mario and Sonic, butchering them all and tainting our childhood memories.<br />
* More Sonichu questions. '''Chris won't upload [[Zapina]] [[Rule 34]] because she is underage and Chris is worried about legal ramifications'''. When he is reassured that this would be legal, he says he would consider it. He will also consider Sonichu-Rosechu anal sex. Rosechu would not clean the [[pickle]] with her mouth, she would clean it off with a washcloth. He would not sell the the washcloth on EBay.<br />
* Chris calls a stop to the potty humor displayed throughout the Sonichu questions.<br />
* '''Chris denies that [[Yawning Squirtle]] is a character'''.<br />
* Fans ask for a joke. He recites a dreadful rhyme about Videogame consoles. He then tells his awful [[Christian's sex joke|sex joke]]. Fans start to tell racist jokes about [[niggos|black people]] and Mexicans. Chris calls for a stop to this.<br />
* A fan says that his friend [[mass debating|masturbated]] to the [[rule 34|adult section of Sonichu]] and is now worried that his friend is a [[homo]], as they were drawn by a man. '''Chris says that this is what he intended it for''', and they are drawings of women, so his friend is straight. He doesn't masturbate to his own drawings.<br />
* Chris reassures a fan that [[Mass Debating|masturbating]] in the same room as another man isn't gay as long as both men are thinking of women, but he would not do this.<br />
* Chris offers no comment as to what constitutes adultery.<br />
* Chris says that he is patriotic. Asked to sing the national anthem, he instead mangles a few lines of "My Country, 'Tis of Thee". He then tells a 'patriotic' joke that is insensitive to Mexicans. [[Chris and Hypocrisy|The fans call him on his "no more racist jokes" statement from earlier]].<br />
* Chris does a poor impersonation of Mr T.<br />
* Chris says that if you are married, sleeping with someone else isn't cheating if you have consent from your spouse.<br />
* Chris gives more advice on homos and recommends Axe body spray for attracting girls.<br />
* Chris has not met any celebrities, only local DJs.<br />
* Does impersonations of Homer Simpson and Bender. The two sound identical.<br />
* Chris gives dating advice: Stay calm, polite, friendly and don't let your nerves get the best of you. Say "Hello, how are you" and talk about yourself. '''[[Barbara|His mom]] told him that standing around with a sign makes him look retarded. A female fan cracks up laughing and can't stop'''.<br />
* "Those who can't, teach"<br />
* Chris says he has never even been on a date. Rejects dating suggestions from fans.<br />
* '''Chris was close with Sarah "[[PandaHalo]]" McKenzie, but hasn't heard from her in over two weeks. He heard about the fires and doesn't know if she's still alive. When a fan adds that 108 people were killed in the fires, Chris responds to the entire ordeal with [[Chris and death|"It's OK though, at least I have a good woman who's willing to be by my side at this point"]]'''.<br />
* When pushed, he says he feels remorse for the the victims of the fires and is concerned that [[Sarah Cassandra McKenzie|Panda]] is dead.<br />
* He asserts that he didn't abandon Sarah for [[Julie]].<br />
* '''A fan says that if [[PandaHalo|Sarah]] isn't alive, Chris should take solace that her perfectly barbecued remains fed the survivors. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|SHUT UP!!!]]'''<br />
* Chris says that he cares about Sarah and Julie equally and wouldn't dump Julie as a friend. A fan asks what he will do to the survivors who ate Sarah. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|"SHUT UP!!!"]] and demands that he be booted.<br />
* Fans reassure Chris that Sarah is probably OK.<br />
* Chris does abominable impersonations of Uncle Ruckus from The Boondocks and Hank Hill. '''He sings "Don't Trust Them New [[Niggos|Niggas]] Over There"'''. He also impersonates Meowth and sings the Team Rocket song.<br />
* [[Clyde]] enters. Chris refuses to answer questions and leaves.<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
===Chris proves he is straight===<br />
'''Guy:''' Chris!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all! ''[echoes]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'll be damned.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh, Chris-[gets cut off by another guy]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh you know, can't com- it's uh, can't complain.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' How's construction of the site?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' [unintelligible] so Chris<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I...I need to ask you something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yup?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh... I put those posters, of the... Playboy and everything in my room, and uh, one of my girlfriends saw it, and she got mad at me for looking at other w-... other girls, and she broke up with me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh... I'm sorry to hear that. It could-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, she's calling me a pervert. I-I don't understand this.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Did you... did you ex- did you try to explain to her about situation between you and that guy?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I... I did, and I don't think she understood.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... well, you should try, you should, uh, s-... try, uh, you should try wr-, you should tr-, uh, do you know her email address?<br /><br />
[pause]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So, uh Chris-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' A-also, wait... also, uh, the friend, I was talking about, he, uh, visited, and [typing noises] he, uh, he went into my room, and didn't even notice the posters. He just s-sat in the middle, he didn't s...sit in any uh, part of the room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Huh. Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, uh... so, yeah, I don't know. I mean, my girlfriend broke up with me, called me a pervert, said that I shouldn't be looking at other girls, I mean... I don't know what to do now.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well listen, uh, answer my question, do you have her email address?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Umm... yeah, but she won't... she won't answer me anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm... ok, hmm. Here's what you can do, uh... Do you know your girlfriend's... any of your girlfriend's [[Gal pal|gal-pals]]?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm... well, you should try to... like wr- you should write out... hmm... hmm... here's an idea. S- Write a letter to her and send it via smail mai-, via snail mail, but don't write the return address. On it.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What should I write?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just like, you know, like, they, you know, this is... you know, this is... you, uh, you put your name there, and you, it's, and then you would basically explain the situation between you and that guy, and that's why you had the posters up, well that's why you put the posters up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't really understand what was the point of the posters in the first place?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[sigh]'' it's... ''[sigh]'' if he looks at... if he, if he is very interested, if he is, if he was straight, he would uh, look at the women. Very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But he didn't even notice them. He didn't notice any of the posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, then I guess he is a [[Homos|homo]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' W...well, um, he wasn't looking at anything, not even the guy posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Hmm... He's not blind, surely.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, like, what is he, is he like, uh...I don't know.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I don't know either, man. But, you know at the moment I would suggest you, uh, write the- write the letter to your girlfriend, send the mail, don't write your return address on the envelope, and, uh, mail it to her.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Also my mom saw the posters and she got offended, she's like really religious and st- she said that like, uh, you know, lust is a sin or some shit. Oh, like she said, she's like all against the, the uhh, the like, Playboy in my room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, your- apparently your mom hasn't been [beeps] that open minded that time. So, you know, give her time to reh-cover, she'll uh, she might op- she might open up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I don't think that was a good idea though, I mean, w-why did-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -you suggest it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I was trying to see if he, to, I was trying to s-help you figure out if your uh, if your friend was a homo or not.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I know, but, do you have uh, [Fans talking] Playboy posters in your room?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unclear] I'm very forward.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I have uh, poster of some, of uh, I have a poster in my room of uh, some uh, naked girls I got from adamandeve.com as a bonus.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Then, nobody says anything about it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[clears throat]'' Well, I didn't really have too many oppor- too many people in my room. So, it's kind of like in a hard to notice place.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Um, wondering, um, If you showed anyone, wouldn't they be offended?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe, maybe not, [Fan grunts] it just depends on their point of view.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I wouldn't want the same thing that happened to me to happen to you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I hear you there. Uh, just to so just sound clear... Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie, are you there?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ok, uh, would you be offended if you saw such a poster in my room?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''[breaks up]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, What will, what was that? [Echoes]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie'''</span> Yes I would, kind of.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well that's no problem, I can take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, see that's what I'm talking about, I mean...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, that's why I asked Julie right now, because I respect her. So, because she said that she would, I will take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I've been thinking, um...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you have... [unclear] Chris, I don't think you should look at other woman.[sic] In my opinion.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I see, Julie. Well that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I...I respect that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' She might get jealous, I mean, that's what happened to my...my girlfriend.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, that's fine Julie, I respect your, I respect that. Just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey, can I ask you a question? If uh, he's done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, uh, one more thing, um, you know I've been thinking, uh, I don't really think you need, you know, posters and stuff like,<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' to prove you're straight, I mean, if you're straight, that's all there is to it i-if, am I right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think you're right.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I...I mean, you shouldn't have to prove that you're straight.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> You're right.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I m-mean [line breaks temporarily] Y-you shouldn't have to reassure yours-self. You should just be knowing it, and nothing anybody says, should get very, uh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, it's ve-ah-very-but you see, I have like, I have that [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] in my room, it's just, so that like, you know, for in case I have any-for in case I have any random thoughts, on account really, to tempt me.<br /><br />
''[unintelligible mix of chatter from most participants trying to get their word in]''<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I mean, even if they're random thoughts, even if they're random thoughts, if you know you're ''positive'' about it, you shouldn't have to look at anything to make sure.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, usually.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay. Uh, moving on from all this homosexuality, uh, I have one question, uh- [gets cut off by Chris in the background] ...never mind, [fat douchebag?]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey, ah, let Julie ask a question, let Julie ask her question.<br /><br />
<br />
===7:08 Julie asks about shotacon===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, I was watching you on the Internet yesterday and, what's a shotacon?[slightly cut off]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...I'm sorry, uh-y, I'm sorry, you got cut off, what was that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> What's a sho-[cuts off again]-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...What's a...''short''?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Shot-[cuts off third time, pretty obvious she's saying ''shota'']-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dude, shota.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, shota.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ssshhhh...shota?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, S-H-O-A-T-A [sic].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, it's a word he found online.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, [baby?], yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never heard of that word.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I dunno, if you want to look it up, you can probably find out on an online dictionary...<br /><br />
''[pause, and a weary sigh from someone other than Chris]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'll-I'll take a look. Hang on.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I know some Japanese and I think I've heard that somewhere, like in a magazine or something.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, it's some of that Japanese shit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Probably is. Three moments, I'll look it up.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Okay!<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's radio is audible]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Whoops, that was the wrong one. The wrong bookmark.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' S-H-O-T-A.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I know, I just get the wrong bookmark for...place I wi-for like...dictionary-type website that I have.<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's keyboard taps are audible]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uhhh...Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, now that Julie's done with her question, I also had one.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' He has to find what that means first.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, ''I'm sorry''.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Shit, ah shit, I've just found it on Wikipedia. It's, uh, it's a ma-it's a Japanese name. It's a name of a person. In Japan.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Really.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a Japanese name. I think it's-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh no no, I think you're looking at the wrong thing, it's S- S-H-O-T-A-C-O-N.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> S-H- I mean- O-T-A-C-O-N? Shotacon?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's the same thing, just put C-O-N at the end.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I've read it in a dictionary before, can't remember what it means...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, oh! Okay, here it is, uh..."shotacon, sometimes shortened to shota, is Japanese slang of the phrase 'Shotaro Complex'"...uh..."that describes the attraction to young boys or an individual with such an attraction".<br /><br />
''[Disgusted reactions heard]''<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh my god, what the fuck?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' There's lots of sick people. Y'all are gonna get ricked?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Someone from 4 cent garbage came in and told us to look that up, I didn't-I didn't even want to.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess he's a homo...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Don't worry I banned him already.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Um, Chris, Vivian wants to know if you can like, turn your radio down a bit, it's distracting.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yes, please turn it down.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I thought that was quiet enough, here.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, no, the lady'll probably pick it up<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Alright cool. Merci.<br /><br />
<br />
===10:21 Another fan asks about art supplies===<br />
<br />
'''Another Fan:''' Okay, um, I have a question, um, I like to draw—interrupted by mumbling—I like to draw comics and such, I mean I want to start up a webcomic. What kind of materials do you use?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, like, you mean for drawing?<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well mostly I just use like, uh, paper without lines, like, computer printer paper you can get in, like, Wal-Mart, for an inexpensive price in multiples.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then I use like an RES—RSVP-brand pen with the black ink.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh okay, is it like, um, a gel pen or a ballpoint pen or-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like a ballpoint, it's like a ballpoint pen.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What do you use to color?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I use Crayola brand markers.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would like to—I would—I would—I would recommend getting the Super Tip 50-pack which you can also find at the Wal-Mart.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay. I-[interrupted by someone else on chat]<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's basically-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' At Wal-Mart I usually get the 24-color RoseArts. Those are—those do pretty good too.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhh, Vivian, just so you—just so you know, I'm using the microphone that came with Hey You, Pikachu for Nintendo Sisty-Four [sic].<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, yeah no, no offense, but uh, personally I prefer like, colored pencils and shit cause-[Chris mumbling is heard]-they're like easier to erase. Photoshop [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If you want to use colored pencils that's fine, I'm not, uh, saying that you have to use Crayola markers-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why don't you use colored pencils? They're really good, you should try one on like, at least one page, just try one. One page with just colored pencils.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But um, actually, you can—you can scan your drawings and then color—color them in like, Photoshop or something. [rest of chat murmurs in agreement] That looks really professional, and really good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I prefer using the markers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's just that I-I mean—I mean I've tried—I mean I've colored with colored pencils before, and I just feel best with using markers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I have a question, um, uh, the Hey You Pikachu microphone, how does that work on the, you're using that on your computer? Did you say?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah it's just, yeah, it's like you plug it into uh, into the basic microphone jack.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh, yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Excuse me, I have a nice little Plantronics headset.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Hey Chris can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah, hang on a second, uh... uh, Omicron, that's uh, you're basically, uh, you're basically plagiarizing here. You're even using, uh, parts of my original drawings to, uh, make up your so called real ones and, you're just—you're just parroting—you're just plagiarizing-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's dirty and illegal.<br /><br />
[Unintelligible mumbling]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, you said so yourself, you're being illegal. And plus, and plus I'm-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, isn't combining Sonic with Pikachu the same thing?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, but, but but also, look at this, also I'm looking at this site here, it said, he's claiming the copyright for himself, but he's, but he's not. I mean that's like, but he's, he—he says<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' You need to ban him immediately.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, ban him immediately.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh wait wait wait wait wait...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah maybe you should check-[interrupted by loud noise, probably Chris]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well he said that, he's saying that all of Sonichu material is copyrighted by him, when it's clearly not.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah but you use Sonic and Pikachu, and you copyrighted it-<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' He just offered to give you credit-[interrupted by noisy chatter]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean, I put, I mean, yeah but, I mean, I'm talking about the—the Omnicron [sic] guy here, that's like, just put this link here.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh he offered to give you credit-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes that's the same thing you did.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well no no, he, no-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We decided-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No he's plagiarizing MY Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We just decided [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris it's, it's a parody, kinda like Sonichu is.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but he—yeah, but he's saying, he said—he—on his front page he says, all Sonichu material-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah but he's, he just offered to change it, so are you okay with that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> By changing it to Sonichu X-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, he said he'll give you credit instead of claiming it for himself.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, uh, yeah I would appreciate that, that would be better, yeah, if... he changed that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Alright cool.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Problem solved.<br /><br />
<br />
===15:02 Chris talks about dildos to prove his strength===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes Julie.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you think you could tell everyone about my idea? And, since you're going to do it do you think you could tell everyone so they could look out for it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, your idea... um, oh oh oh, yeah, just basically a video of me standing up to Clyde and showing him how strong I am, doin' a few kicks for the camera or something-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, you should throw some punches, show him what you're made of, you know?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Kick, punch, it's all in the mind ''etc.''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I basically... I pretty much did that when I...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Let him talk, c'mon!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I pretty much did - already proved my strength when I... ripped that... ''dildo'' in half.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Foreign-Sounding Guy:''' Most dildos come apart for cleaning.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' C'mon.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but that thing was screwed together at the seam.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok listen to me...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris...<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' Eh Chris!<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ...could you do a like further test of your strength for me?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''stress sigh'' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I wanna see how strong you are please.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...That's fine, I can do that.<br /><br />
'''Other Fan:''' I mean that's ok, you showed your strength, but you should show her your moves. Like show her, like, what kind of moves you can do.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, let me tell you a story about how this'll work, ok.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' See, my, uh, one of my cousins, uh, this guy at school, kept, y'know, picking on him, calling him gay and stuff, and trying to fight with him, and my cousin told him to sss- y'know, one day, the guy said "Hey man, I'm gonna beat you up" and my cousin said "Look, if I show you some of my moves, I'll prove to you I can kick your ass in a fight" and so my cousin, y'know, he stepped back and, he took, uh, he took Tae Kwon Do, and he did a couple moves, y'know? He just stood there for like five minutes just doing his moves, and, y'know, some punches and kicks and... The guy just backed right off; he didn't even want to talk to him any more. So I think that should work.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> All right, well I'll try that. I'll try that.<br/><br />
'''Guy:''' All right. Sounds good.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br?><br />
'''Fan:''' You try- you always mention about how you're straight but yet in your video about you crushing a dildo, uh, doesn't that kinda like, y'know, not help your cause?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, it proves I'm straight because...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' But you have a dildo.<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I got it free with an order on adameve.com<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' But you ''kept'' it and shit. That ain't cool.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' What I don't... Why were there batteries in...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh yeah Chris, why ''were'' there batteries in it? Why did you keep it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I mean...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it wasn't an easy thing for me to sell, right off the bat, or even to make a profit, so...<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In fact in a way it's a good thing I kept it, cause it allowed me to be able to break it, like I did.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes but why would you keep it?<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why would you keep it?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I woulda saved it for my sweetheart, if she'd wanted it. To use it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Aaaahhh.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But if I were there wouldn't you prefer the real deal?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Some things that metal just can't replace.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Yeah.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I heard that.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' You didn't use it did you?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No I did not.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Did you just throw all the ones you had away?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I only had that one. And there you go, I ri- there you go, I broke it apart.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you just, like, ''take'' it apart, I mean, it did...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' ...seem to come apart, like, screwed on...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I did not take it apart, that thing was glued at the seam. I had to put a lot of strength into breaking it at the middle there.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, but I think, um, showing your moves would be better.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Right.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Clyde would mess with you if you show him you can kick his ass.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey, Chris's a muthafuckin' ''gangsta''!<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Blap blap.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yes, Chris will fuck Clyde's shit up.<br /><br />
(awkward pause)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait, Chris, didn't you say you used a - didn't you say you used scissors to break the dildo?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I pretty much did have to so I could break that ''glued seam''.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, I thought you broke it with your hands.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well I- yeah well I would have but it was dang glued at the seam, so I clipped straight in with the scissors I had.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a pair of Super Shears from [[Cutco]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(feigning interest)'' Huh.<br /><br />
<br />
===19:50 Chris defends his Rule 34===<br />
<br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, let's talk about something else. Uh, Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whenever the announcement of the adult Sonichu page, when I looked at your gallery, very nice stuff, you know, I see a picture of what looks like you with a Sonichu, uh, medallion. Like, and, who's that one girl, exactly?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Who, [[Megan]]?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I thought it was, like, [[Crystal]], cause of the hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, it was - it was originally drawn to be Megan but I censored her eyes to, uh, port- to protect her identity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Mmmmmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''(laughing)'' That's stupid! (?) That's so silly.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I drew that after I found the ED page in November.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you say that?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In protest against it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thought you were going to get rid of it anyway.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I tore up the original drawing, I, in- into squares, and I put in in an envelope.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you upload it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you do that shit? Like, and...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I understand Rosechu, but, like y'know, why, like, something that's from real life. That's the problem (?)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's not necessarily from real life, it depends on you inter- it depends on your interpretation, I mean it's hardly- I mean, '''most women have long brown hair, and the eyes are censored''', so...<br/><br />
(laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''Most'' women?!?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I remember in that one video you were saying it was Megan.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because it broke, because it end up, because it the end it broke up my friend - broke up my friendship eve, my uh, friendship with Megan.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um, can I ask you a question? In the third picture, with [[Angelica Rosechu]], what is... what's happening, is... God... doing...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nope. She's masturbating. And she's enjoying it.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But she has no hands there. How's she doing it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' She's ''enjoying'' it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But she does... She does...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah but how's she doing it? She doesn't have her hands there.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> She does have her hands, she's... ''(stress sigh)'' She's... like most women would be able to do the same thing.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thing it's the angle, Julie. I think it's the angle you were looking at it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah plus uh, the picture wasn't, uh, very - wasn't as clear as, like, you know, I would have liked to have had it, uh, I mean, I had that file for a while, and it...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah some of those are kinda blurry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, some deg- some degraded.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ? a good question, have you drawn anything... of... have you drawn anything like that with me? Cause I would actually like to see, if you did. If so, could you, and let me see? I, uh, sorry, that's very rude to ask.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm sorry, let me answer this guy. Yeah, well, I made a retraction video later saying that I- I disowned that address.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ah, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just after that guy hacked into it and changed to it to suck. And as such.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hang on, I'm gonna take a look at that... My Youtube...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I like this song.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What song?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' The song that's playing in the background of, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what do you think of, uh, what do you think of that guy who advertises products, Billy Mays? What do you think of him?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... Billy... Oh! Yeah he's an ok guy, I watched him on Home Improvement.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Billy Mays?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, that was another guy on Home Improvement, Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No that was the same guy. That was the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Really?!? Let's look up. IMDB, go. ''(sound of typing)''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Believe me, it's the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, I really enjoyed your, um, adult, uh, section of the site.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... okey dokey, very good. Aaahh, trying to figure out how to update the link on this thing here. Oh, maybe under here. Oh there it is, thank God (?), update right now.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(singing)'' You spin me right round baby, right round...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (joining in) Like a record baby, right round round round<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's a classic, I can't help in man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There you are, updated. It's finally fixed.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Actually that was Richard Karn on Home Improvement, not Billy Mays.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well my mistake, I mean the guy had the beard and uhh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh yeah I can understand.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And the voice sounds- and the voice sounds the same...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah. They sound the same.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There's a matter of interpretation apparently I misinterpreted so I will admit that I was wrong.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah see we all make mistakes, don't be too hard on yourself.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unintelligible babble or singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you gotten any fan art submissions or notable? For the uh- webpage?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I got one today... It's like mostly a drawing of that uh that uh- of the fan herself.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -got in the snail mail today.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -Sunday.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hmmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What are you doing for this Valentine's day Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhm... I'm sorry, what was that question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What will you be doing this year on Valentine's day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm depends...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ahhh, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm.<br /><br />
Fan: Surely a man of such magnitude as yourself are going to be doing something important, aren't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Magnitude? Way to choose the words buddy.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Vocabulary talent.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, cause I don't have Julie over here yet.<br /><br />
(Reactions of OHs and AHs)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If she was here...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible) -play games.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Or we could just uh... talk.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Ehehehehe. Maybe... uh... why no redheads?<br /><br />
'''Other Woman:''' Yeah?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I was trying to think about that when the other guy asked that question. Uh... I was trying to think up that unh... mmmm... Uhhhh, redheads just don't be very- tract me so much.<br /><br />
Several: Uh, ah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's- it's- a- pi- a possibility that they're dyed.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmmmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But yeah y'know natural redheads enh, yeah, just don't really turn me on as much.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I see...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you thought about girls with um, highlights?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... (pause) aaahhhh... what turns me on hhh- (inhales) (pause) obviously the women.<br /><br />
'''Man:''' Gotta have the women. (?)<br /><br />
'''Guy''': What about piercings or tattoo?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, neither of those.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhhh-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris! How bout like non-orange hair, not like... no, never mind. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... oh... okay... hmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait Chris! How do you feel about blue hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Blue hair's okay, otherwise I wouldna- Otherwise I wouldn't've liked Sailor Mercury.<br /><br />
'''British? guy:''' That is true, she does have blue hair.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' She's a very fine character. There is no way to deny it.<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Blue hair is OFF DA HOOK!!!<br/><br />
<br />
===28:35 Chris impersonates various cartoon characters===<br />
<br />
'''British??? guy:''' Doesn't Marge Simpson have blue hair as well?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (in some kind of insane voice) Oh yeah! Marge Simpson has blue hair and it's as tall as the Empire State building!!!<br /><br />
(Some HMMs UHs and UMs follow)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yo Chris!! Can you do some impersonations for us?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Oh we'd love to hear that!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just did Marge Simpson.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah you're really talented.<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(Several people talking at once)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> -they're really good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Do another SimpsonsChris, how about Comic Book Guy?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Mmmmhmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I'm very indeed. Oh aren't we all promiscuous and whatnot. I like Batman and Robin, oh look! Stan Marsh has come into the thing again - I forget that guy's name, that guy who did the Marvel comics.<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Stan Lee. (Pause) Chris do your Donald Duck impression.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Everybody have fun (incoherent and scary quacking)<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris you should work for Disney.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's good Chris.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Have you ever considered being a voice actor?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Errrrrp... possibly, I'm not sure.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (incoherent, cut off by Chris)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent... another cartoon voice)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris, you're a Christian, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I was just wondering-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahm actu-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -do you just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm actually a Methodist church.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome, I was just wondering: Do you think AIDS was sent by god to kill the homos or do you think that it's just an accident or something man-made?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thou- the thought never occurred to me... thought never occurred to me.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' can you do an impression of Arnold Schwarzenegger?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hold- the question...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Let Chris answer the question.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thought- the thought never occurred to me about what you just said about the AIDS there mmmm... but y'know, it's a possibility and I will not agree nor disagree with it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I was just wondering I mean, I've had that discussion with some of my Christian friends. I just wanted to get your opinion, thank you.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmhhh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think (clears throat) I think Omicron has a point and you did tell me you went to a methodist church didn't you? So that's-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well th- well my Methodist church is uh more loose on- is not as strict on uh- on uh sex.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris I don't know- I don't know that much about religion in the States but I don't think there is a looser Meth- Methodist church. God makes the rules Omicron says.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, hmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well, you know personally I think that the government made AIDS to kill off all the brothers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whoa, whoa... That's what the blacks always say.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. (pause) I'm going to agree, that sounds like something that uh... well, a black guy would say.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So your church is kinda of uh- they let you do- their kinda loose on the whole moral restrictions?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... (pause) uhhh... that's... what's the question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Your church they- you said they're kind of more uh- y'know they're less strict on the whole moral thing, like, as far as sexuality goes? Right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -ah basically.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But y'know, uhh, I thought you're supposed to listen to the Bible or whatever not, y'know, not necessarily- no, never mind.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (interrupts)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, there's also a uh, there's also a- think about this uh, if you uh- if you- if you were a think uh- you have to find for yourself a good meaning behind uh- good meaning behind watching pornography to uh- like teach how it- how to do this and that when you actually get around to doing it...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's all ???<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's all's considered education for yourself.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' How is that realistic at all?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, it's uh- not a really good thing to learn from, trust me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It can be done before marriage as well as long as me and my sweetheart really love each other very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But not in Christianity.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But all I'm saying is y'know, porn is completely, completely unre- unrealistic I mean you can't really learn anything from it.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It gives- it gives you enough ideas.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unclear)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (incoherent) porn.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' When you actually have sex, it's nothing like porn.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe not like you, you not gonna do it-<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' You can't do it immediately- immediately anal sex cause most women are not very happy with anal sex and also...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay, shut up<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' -and also weird-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Shut up.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Yes.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And... that wasn't cool, like...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That was uncalled for...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, like, suthin' a BLACK MAN would say...<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' That's racist man...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, somebody said it on here first before I did.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Does that make it ok?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, I think he's trying to make it clear that- I dunno.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I typically agree with that guy.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So nothing g- it doesn't make it ok.<br /><br />
(incoherent)<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling) I wi- I'm sorry, I take it back.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(unclear)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Guys can we get back to Sonichu, Please?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah this is getting ridiculous.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unclear) -Sonichu actually.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Anyway, my question is that: why does Sonichu not wear clothes while Rosechu and the other Rosechus do wear clothes? And underwear?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Aaaaaaaaaamp... It's like uh- it's basically a cartoon and it doesn't really matter, it's like... mm... think about this: Most cartoon characters wear at least one article of clothing. At least one article. And uh- it's like Yogi Bear who just wears a necktie and a hat.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 35.14)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Other Guy:''' I think it would be cool if all the Sonichus and Rosechus got together and they and- they all formed a big team and they had special uniforms or something, kinda like the X-men.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Or Power Rangers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh yeah, I don't do- I don't do well- I'm not in- no uniforms. It's a uniform and other Sonichus and Rosechus.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'm just wondering if you'd do another impression: What does Blachu sound like? Uh, Black Sonichu? Or Blake?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eeeeuuunh... Eh... ahhhh...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Can you imitate it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... I'm not sure... uhhhhm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Like does he sound black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Possibly, but I'm not certain. I'm not leaning towards it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I'd like to hear it, but if you don't want...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just never- I just never really thought about that. I'd say that he possibly sounds similar to uh, y'know Shadow the hedgehog. But he could possibly sound, black. He could. Don't quote me on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' All right, I was just wondering if you'd do his voice but...<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Hey why does the BAD guy gotta be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never said the bad guy "has to" be black. (pause) I mean, look at the- the range of villanies, I mean there's black and whites and uh... male females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I noticed that uh- Silvana's also... black lookin'.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just decided to color her black because she was born- she came from outer space from a black egg, which was the- which came out of the rainbow.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah, I was also wonderin' about that like-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I- I- I-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' If Silvana came out of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes it's-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Why would she be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' I mean like black ain't part of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like the black sheep of the family. Y'know you put all the colors together and it does become black.<br /><br />
(unintelligible reactions)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -like a brownish-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) is a (unintelligible) color.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Maybe it's because she's from space and there's not a lot of light in space and it's dark or something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah that- a uh yeah- that's one of the-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hmmm.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhm, did you look at the link of my friend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, ummmm...<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Yeah, since you love blue hair.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh- no I haven't looked at it and I don't wanna make Julie feel jealous if I did- if I went and did.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Julie would mind.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhhh...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You look at pornography don't you?<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' (mumble)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, that- that was two syllables "Rose-chu". You don't- don't add- don't say the "e" it's just "Rosechu".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah you went over this last chat.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>(I don't know, it sounds like "narrator")<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sounds like he says "narrator" again)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh... I was just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, well, obviously the uh- the narrator who did those audio books was incorrect. Specially since I never gave that person the approval to do the audiobooks.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think it's just a fan project and I think he-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' and I think he might have one of the West coast dialects. I know that the South they say y'all but over here-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well obviously he lied-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -different. I'd be proud if they made one of my projects into an audiobook though. That means that there are a lot of fans out there that really like it.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Ay.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' They're not selling to try and make any money off it. They're not trying to rip you off. They always made sure- they always narrate the first page by saying "Christian Weston Chandler" so they're not trying to cheat you or anything.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' The people know you're making it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I- I hear that. I just, apparently they misin- misinterpreted the (audio breaks up) name Rosechu. Or mispronounced it. Misinterpreted, mispronounce- fairly the same thing in that situation... possibly. To answer that question... possibly.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uh, Vivian said that the audiobooks made Sonichu way popular that- than you could ever ever do on your own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I will not disagree with the statement. And I appreciate her help.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris. Would you be offended if a fan wrote a fanfiction about Sonichu?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Faaanfiction... if it's- if it's not demeaning or makes them look stupid. Then it's fine- it's fine. (pause) Like I did mind when, shoot, what's his name? That guy... uhhhh... that guy that the uhhhh... did the animations, on his computer.<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' You did mind or you didn't?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Animations???<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think I know what he's talking about. Are you talking about the um...<br /><br />
<br />
(background noise begins)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' Well the original play was a Greek play. Where they're all y'know... Greeks... and crazy stuff happens and they're all runnin' around in togas. So if you ever wanna see the movie "A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum" it was a classic and it had some real classic people from the 50s and 60s in it. Kinda like "It's a MAD MAD MAD MAD World". Sort of a classic old school movie from funny old school world. First color movie type thing. But that'll be a high school play. You'll wanna see that. You might actually enjoy it. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
(inaudible response)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' You never know that might be fun to do. Well I guess that wouldn't work on the weekend then... you gotta...<br /><br />
<br />
'''(FOR THOSE OF YOU WONDERING WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON, IT APPEARS THAT THERE WAS SOME TECHNICAL PROBLEM THAT CAUSED ANOTHER MUMBLE CHANNEL TO BE RECORDED WHILE THE CONVERSATION WITH CHRIS BECAME BARELY AUDIBLE BACKGROUND NOISE. INSTEAD ALL THAT CAN BE HEARD IS SOME BUTTFACE YAMMERING ABOUT FILMS AND TELEVISION SHOWS. I'M NOT GOING TO KEEP TRANSCRIBING IT. CHRIS IS STILL TALKING AND ANSWERING QUESTIONS, BUT NOTHING CAN BE UNDERSTOOD OVER THESE GUYS.)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''(AT 42.56 THE AUDIO SUDDENLY RESUMES NORMALLY)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Unknown person:''' Uh you-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I uh- noticed he's another BLACK villain.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah in real life he was black. Without meaning any offense to the uh- black guy in general, cause you've noticed, among the Jerkops there's uh- we got black's and white's, males and females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(several people jump in at once)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) -you've never drawn a female officer before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well y'know uhhh... uhhh, comic book number 7, near the end. Near the end of the time travel episode. Uhh, I have no opinion about what Obama's doing cause I don't watch the news.<br /><br />
Accented woman: But you voted for him, didn't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes I voted for him because I saw myself in him when I com- when I saw both the documentaries and downloaded them for the Playstation Network between Obama and McCain. I mean voted for a person I saw more of myself of-<br /><br />
Accented woman: You usually vote for someone based on their political leanings, not how you view them. As I were Republican, I voted for John McCain. Not because I liked him but because I- he had the same political views as me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basi- basically I'm a moderate.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh, I see. Um, I was wondering. I was reading opinions: do you agree with his financial bailouts?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm, I don't even know what it is. So I can't disagree or agree.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Well, to make it short um, it's about uh- the government- President Obama is planning to uh- a new one- (cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You got cut off there.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uhh, ok, we lost him.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yo, Chris, uh, do you, you didn't just vote for Obama cause he was black, did you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I did not vote for him because he was black. I voted for him cause I saw myse- because I saw myself in him. In like, similar lifestyles. And I saw that he was a good man, I mean after all, com- I saw- I saw I watched both of the A&E documentaries, before I can- before I knew who I would vote for.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 45.29)'''<br /><br />
<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris:, Chris what did you see in him that you say in your self?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Like for one thing we were like outcasts, at least one point in our lives.<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Wait, wait hold up earlier you said that you thought he would probably paint the white house black.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh oh that was my father’s joke he said that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Is your father a racist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but you see I drew that for him before I saw the documentaries so respectfully withdrew that comic page.<br /><br />
'''???:''' does your father hate black people.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Not necessarily but it’s just how my father just how my father that does not reflect in any way that’s how he felt (annoying ass noise in the background)<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Man that racist.<br /><br />
'''??? :''' Hey Chris I so the ahh saw the Sonichu and Rosechu love sack that you put up and I thought if was pretty cool for (you adult friends?) I just had a question though: do you have any plans in the comic to have romance between you and one of the hedgehogs I mean-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Yelling) No no no<br /><br />
'''???:''' -we would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' I mean is was just wondering because there are fans how would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Now- now that you answered the his question my kind of relates to his what are your thoughts on inter racial breeding and marriages?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would not agree of disagree with them but in my personal preference I would fell- I would feel more comfortable in having a full relationship with a white woman but I am willing- am still willing to be friends and acquaintances and give and have respect for the black women as well.<br /><br />
'''???:''' What about Asians like Japanese?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I’m ok with them as well (yelling) a once.<br /><br />
'''???:''' So would you get married with a Japanese woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hhhmmmm I would have, yes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> but I’m giving Julie to opportunity here.<br /><br />
'''Clyde:''' Julie’s a lucky woman.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris, I was just wondering, is Silvana gonna become one of the good guys, like- like Black Sonichu did before?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There’s a possibility but I have not given that a co- I have not confirmed that yet.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Uh, is she gonna lose the male sexual parts and become a full-fledged woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhhmmm possibly but I haven’t given that- I haven't given that thought either.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Also um I was reading (?Phillip’s?) question, Chris what did you want to be when you were little?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don’t remember, I do not remember. I’m just making it as I go basically.<br /><br />
'''???:''' is there ever gonna be like uh, an end to your sonichu series like a finale?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hmmmm I don’t know, probably would not.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Oh so it keeps going and going?<br /><br />
???: You ever consider making comic about the history of CWCville?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhmmmm an episode dedicated towards that possibility.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris are you going to keep the name changes that you made or are you going back to the original names?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahhh ya I’m keeping the name changes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' But you know umm Nintendo was umm, y'know, they sent you a letter you never really talk about it further.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but at least- at least- the hel- they use to benefit me for the fact that uh allowed me to fix noting in that sense so I couldn’t be sued by such people in that sense.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 50 min)'''<br /><br />
<br />
(scattered reactions)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So the name changes were good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So uh, Chris I was wondering if uh Mary- Mary Lee Walsh Or I guess the new name: Ryam Sla- I don't know-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Sla-weel.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Slaweel, thank you. Uhm, if she were to use her magic to curse Rosechu with a penis, would Soni- what- wou- would that test the relationship between Sonichu and her? While they were fighting the battle to have it removed, I'm just curious.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... Firstly uh, she does not- she does not have the power ch- to do that.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I just thought you know, remember you did the story about 4-cent-garbage and drawing all the- the picture and-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah you what, that's one- that's one thing: drawing them, but not actually putting them on the character.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Cause I think that would be like an epic story though, like to actually have a quest-<br /><br />
Fan: I'll second that.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -to go to have that penis removed from Rosechu. I mean it's a test of romance between her and Sonichu.<br /><br />
(muttering)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And when that prevails and the penis is removed and everybody- everybody lives happily ever after. Y'know that would be awesome.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnnnnnh, I dunno I have to- I dunno I have to think about that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It is a really good idea. I like it.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I do too.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah, that's good.<br /><br />
Other fan: It could show just how much Rosechu means to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I'll- I'll consider it but I'm not making any promises.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' We understand.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(several talking at once)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -decided on that subject?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm working on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' If you actually decide to go forward with that story? Do you think maybe- maybe you could give her a talking penis?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!!!<br /><br />
(laughter from various people)<br /><br />
(unintelligible responses)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ok, I think- I think we've talked enough about that one guys.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I have a question that doesn't involve penises.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Anyway, my question is since we've been hearing lot of vicious lies and slander about this, could you confirm exactly why you've been fired from your job at Wendy's Chris? Cause we've been hearing all sorts of- of crazy things and we wanna know the truth.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmmmmmm... well, firstly, what have you heard?<br /><br />
'''Other guy:'''Well we heard that uh you... we've heard so many things like you helped a small child and you did a Donald Duck impersonation and you scared the child.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... also that- also that is correct but I did not scare the child. The child was tired, I was only trying ta- I was only trying to make the child feel better. That's a little amusement. But I did not make the child cry, the child was already- was just tired.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' So you didn't help them cut their food and... yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I did help them- help them get their food to- by giving them uhh, by giving them bags and a top for their baked potato boat.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris, when will um, the pictures of Zapina, appear on the um, 18 plus page?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that was a deleted scene! That was a deleted scene.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Why was it deleted?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basically, hhh... y'c- y'cant' really have it if you don't have Rosechu working to take the- working to take the pictures of herself up in the bathroom. Cause like can't have one without the other.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaahhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I don't know if this is a good question but there's something I wonder about that- we kind of have this DVD you made and... y'know, we never unfortunately got... but I'm curious um... do you ever plan to release it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I'd pay money for that, I think everyone else here would probably pay money for it too.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Indeed.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (breaking up) I wanna ask a question.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I hear it's also on YouTube.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris do you know that you've influenced the rap/hip hop community?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmh... uh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I just wanted to mention that because I saw some YouTube videos and it- and- and from some underground hip hop artists such as Immortal Technique and they've sampled some of your voice audio complaining about your struggles with uhm... with the school board, with the security guards and they were- they felt so empowered that they actually took those words and mad'em into a very powerful rap song. How does that- how is your reaction to that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhhhh... basically I have not watched those videos so... I don't have an opinion.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I will provide you a link to that, hold on a moment.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh that's ok, actually I uh, did sample one. The one where they basically played the parody from "Can't touch this".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, no, trust me it's waaay more serious than that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I still haven't heard of- heard of what you're talking about.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Nevermind.<br /><br />
(rustling and moving noises)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do an impression of MC Hammer?<br /><br />
(more clicking and rustling)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Can't touch this do do do doo do dooo Can't touch this! Do do do dooo do do do... can't touch this.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' That was- heheheh.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Awesome.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you- can you do Dr. Nick Riviera from the Simpsons?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> HIIII EVERYBODY!<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hello Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hi Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hi Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that should say Dr. Nick cause that's who I'm imitatin'.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''???:''' That uh-<br /><br />
'''???:''' HELLOOO EV'RYBODY!!!!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well that-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hi Dr. Nick!<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Thank you, I love the Simpsons.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do... Peter from Family Guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhenhenhenh... Hey Lois! Look at me! I'm just (unclear) you nose, and I'm eatin' your nose.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh that's dead on.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Oh would you- Omicron's been interested in tis- would you actually make a documentary like- like your other DVD but make your daily life?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... I'm... yeah I might but uh... I'm not su- I'm not sure bout it at the moment.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaaaaaaanh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris can you do Mario? You know from Super Mario?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hay paisano! How you doin' mistah hedgehog!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's very good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then Sonic- then Sonic would say "what?!?"<br /><br />
(giggling)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris do you have any plans to make a video of yourself taking a dump on a Hexbox?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No! That's gross.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Yeah that was pretty sick right there.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Let's ban him.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's bad enough I cut in half with an axe.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> and one of the elevator jokes...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Oh we remember that, that was a classic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And I earned a trophy for that.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmm...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Yeah, I remember that, it was destroying a Hexbox by cutting it in half if I remember...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' If I were to draw nude Zapina fanart, uhm, would you put them on the site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... uhh, your- you uh- free to draw them at your- at your own- own preference, but I will not be- I will not put it on the website because- cause- because I will not want to break any laws of having underage portrayals- portrayals of underage nudity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Isn't Dot a child?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry... what?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dot, from Animaniacs.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' So-uh- uhm- I think I looked up somewhere that um, drawings do not count, they're just lines on paper not like real pictures that are horrible.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah I believe-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Draw-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (cut off)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Those illustrations do not count as child pornography. Because with drawing it's art- it's artistic merit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Welll... I dunno, I guess it depends I have to- but- y'know you could do the drawing and I'll think- I'll consider it.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, would it be possible to get any pictures of Sonichu having anal sex with Rosechu?<br /><br />
(pause... thumps and feedback)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm considering that but...<br /><br />
'''Accented woman''' Who keeps letting this person in? You are very offensive.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -and and, if you draw those, do you think that Rosechu would actually clean Sonichu's penis off with her mouth (laugh) w-when they're done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nah, no, I don't think so, I think- I think- I think it would be unh- yeah w-wash it off with a washcloth.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Do you think then, at that point then they would sell the washcloth on eBay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!<br /><br />
(people talking over each other)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, no, no more potty humor, all right?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah alright, okay<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Unrelated to party humor, I want to ask that in your Springbreak uhh Issue of Sonichu you had an introduction of a, of new character, the [[Yawning Squirtle|squirtle]] and I wanna ask<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:''' (interrupting)</span> No, that's, no, no, no, that's not just a character, I was, I was not introducing a new character, I was just doing like a poster thing for a bubble speak under one, I thought I just draw some water type pokemon un-in there<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I understand but the thing is there is huge cult following for that character and I strongly suggest that you should capalize on that and, and make him to a main character<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eh... No, I don't think so<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's just sleeping Squirtle work- waking up!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, people just thought he was really cute and yawning Squirtle, I don't know, I heard someone say, man wouldn't it be great if he would be that [[Autistic|dopey]] sidekick that he'd come and they'd be like, like, he'd come in and say something silly after someone did something and they would be like "Squirtle"!<br /><br />
People laughing and talking over each other<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um...<br /><br />
???: Yo, it makes you *unintelligible* (Chris and someone talk over another)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yes Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I'm asking you about... Hm... Never mind, I lost my train of thought. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's okay. These guys made me lose a train of thought as well. Doesn't multiple inputs.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yes, kinda lotta control here. I might- I may have to... never mind<br /><br />
Silence<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I never lose my train of thought because I have a GPS tracking system on it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, that was a good joke. (chuckle)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, could you tell us a joke right now. Just any joke.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay, here is a fuck- here is a funny- here is a funny mind scream. Funny rhyme scheme... not to be taken literally:<br /><br />
On your Game Boy Advance SP<br /><br />
create 'yer MII<br /><br />
den play it on WII<br /><br />
with your PSP<br /><br />
hooked to your PS3<br /><br />
cause it's fun<br /><br />
see?<br /><br />
And never ff, and never play a [[Hex Box]] 360<br /><br />
Because it's stupid and you're not a dummy (in childlike voice)<br /><br />
Mock laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That is really good.<br />
'''Fan''': Chris is that something you made up?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I made that up.<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Chris, Chris, can I write that down and tribute to quote you that? Oh man, that's good<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) So you mean to type it up and you quote me on the rhyme scheme?<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Yeah, I'd like that. I've been thinking about making a quote book like a mini Chris quote book like something you could open and have a cool line to say when you're on a party and you're like right things.<br /><br />
People talking over Chris and Alucard<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, well I'm typing it up for Alucard, so...<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Thank you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, can we hear one more?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay well here, okay um, okay here is an [[Christian's sex joke|adult joke]] I once come up with a long time ago.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': This is going to be good!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright- Alright there's this married couple, Bob and Jane, and they've been- they were looking forward to having children. So, one night, Bob comes home from work, and uh Jane says, "Hi, you had a good day, dear?" And he sa- and she sa-- he says, "Nah, it's been a long day, darling" And she said, "Well, it's okay, why don't we go upstairs, and we'll have some Breakfast." And he says, "Breakfast, at Nine p.m.?" And she says, "Sure, you bring the MILK, and I'll get an EGG."<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yo, I heard that before, man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then later, they had a boy and a girl, Junior Bacon and Orange Juice. All Part of a Balanced Breakfast.<br /><br />
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif]]<br /><br />
Perplexed silence<br />
<br />
'''Fan''': Hey, Chris, how do you solve a Mexican tank?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Stand in front of it?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': No, man, shoot the guys pushing at it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fans''': Oh that's a good one.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' I got one.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get a bunch of [[Niggos|blacks]] in a car?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Throw some chicken in.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get them out of the car?<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Job application.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What do you call a beach of black people buried up to their necks?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Afro-turf.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I came up with one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what's the difference between a black man and a pizza?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': A pizza can feed a family of four.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': How do you stop black people from jumping on a bed?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, enough racist jokes.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Put velcro on the ceiling.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enough, enough black jokes.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, uh Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Sorry<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I showed by friend that over 18 site, and he said, that he um, he um, you know he, he masturbated to it. Does that make you feel (interrupted)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's good, that's basically the reaction I would be going for. Among the male ca... among the male population, being attracted to the women.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But those are your drawings, it's like, I think he's gay now. I mean, you're a guy and you drew those.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm drawing, I'm drawing female characters.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yah, but it's drawn by you and you're, like, I don't know. It's kind of awkward for me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris, I actually need to thank you, the pictures on that site, it looked like the camera was inside Sonichu's penis when Rosechu was giving him a blowjob. That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. I've always wanted to have a camera in my penis so that I could see that if I ever got a blowjob, that would be awesome, I just wanted to say thank you very much for that perspective. It's the first time I've ever seen it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': There's a question here on the site, oh sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, well I see it... no I don't basically masturbate to my own drawings.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But you're okay if other people do, right? Even guys?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You're okay if other people, you know, masturbate to your drawings? Even if they're guys, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If the guys are masturbating to the female drawings, then yes, that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I just thought it was kind of awkward, but maybe I'm seeing it a different way.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I doubt that, uh, having a whole bunch of drawings of naked female characters can be misinterpreted as something else.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Can I to ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': One time, a friend and I were looking at porn together, and we masturbated together, but the porn was straight, ordinary porn. Is this gay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I'm sorry, where you looking at naked women?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Yes, but we were in the same room, masturbating.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, if you both were thinking about the naked women you were looking at, then I would definitely say you both are straight, cuss you're not thinking about each other, you're thinking about the women.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Right. <br /><br />
'''Fan''': Would you do that with someone?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': I'm relieved.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Man, nigger you gay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Shut up. Would you do that with someone? Like a guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Nah, I'm straight dog.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I'd, yeah I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Omnicron has a question on here, on the side here.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You see it, or?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. That's not straight.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what about the earlier question.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, the one before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, which one before? Oh, you mean...<br /><br />
(All talk at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, what do you think about-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wait, wait let him answer.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Let him answer that one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was gonna rephrase it but okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'd say it would depend on your interpretation, what is adultery to you?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But, you know, isn't the Bible only supposed to be interpreted, it's the word of God, you're not really supposed to interpret it any other way.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': It is what it is.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's in English.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh, I have no comment.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, that's what my, uh, you know I was talking about my mom saw those drawings. I mean, not the drawings, the posters, the playboy posters and that's basically what she got bad about. She said I was committing adultery.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah okay, if you don't want to talk about it, fine.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, hmmm, I think you shou, I think you should, uh, when you, I think I can see where this could be interpreted one way or another, it depends on how you look at the woman. I mean, alright, you're looking at the, uh woman, you might imagine her naked, but, I mean, you would respe- I mean, you would, you would still respect, I mean, if you were still respecting that woman, you would appreciate her more for like who she was aside or in addition to the nudity, then that's not as bad as just, as just only doing it for the appearance.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's why, uh, that's why the playboy magazines, they give you the introductions of the women. It's like letting you know who they are (unintelligible).<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh but, yeah, but there weren't any, uh, descriptions under the, yeah never mind.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Thank you for the clarification Chris.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris, do you love America?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm patriotic.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's good. I was wondering if you could sing the national anthem for us?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [[Wikipedia:My Country, 'Tis of Thee| My country tis' of thee. Sweet land of liberty. Of thee, of thee I sing.]] I don't remember the rest.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Lands where my fathers died.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Land of the pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
(Fans all start singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Stop it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey I'll, I'll tell y'all a funny joke that's kind of patriotic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, you got this, you got this funny Mexican- you got this funny Mexican guy, and he just, he just come back home to Meh-he-co after an American visit. He's like (high pitched voice) Oh the people there are so very friendly. I mean, I go to the basketball game. I sit in the back row. I sit in the back row. And then, and then, and then all of a su- and then all of the sudden right before the game started, everyone turned around, put their hands on their chests, and they say, "Oh say can you seeeeee"!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I thought you said no racist jokes?<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': Yeah man, that ain't cool!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was a name, it was a name joke.<br /><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''':...Spanish language<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm kind of offended by that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': That's racist dog. That ain't cool.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': You laugh you support terrorism.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ¿Qué?<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What'd you say?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What the hell? Who said that?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Forget it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I said, you laugh, you support terrorism.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, he's gone.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Awful Mr. T impression) I pity the fool, who try and misinterpret things, and twist them around, and then jam new words into my mouth.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You do a good Mr. T<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah you do.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) no jibber jabber.<br /><br />
(Fans laugh)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, did you watch the A-team back in the day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No but, no but, basica- but I have seen Mr. T. And then I also, I also saw when he guest, when he quest starred in an episode of Alvin and the Chipmunks.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I saw that episode, he helped uh Theodore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Theodore was getting picked on, yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, you posted a link here.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well at my [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|Methodist church]], uh, sex before marriage is okay as long as, uh, she and I, we love each other very much and truly.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But that's what they tell you, I'm talking about the word of God.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *Sigh* Okay, I'm getting tired, okay, I'm getting tired here, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, but...<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, sorry, no more of that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, you're right. Please stay Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay. Alright, I'll stay a little while longer.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, if anyone does, if anyone asks anything that makes him feel uncomfortable, I'm gonna kick you out of the room.<br /><br />
(Everyone speaks)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Chris, could you give me some advice?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I have a Japanese friend, he's, he's actually 26 and he's never had a girlfriend and we asked him some questions, just joking around one day. And we asked him if his, when he gets married, if his wife wanted to sleep with another man, would he be okay with it, and he actually said yes, as long as she wasn't being forced. Now that kind of bothered us, because us Americans, right, we think that marriage, and you know you're with somebody, they should be faithful, but he doesn't seem to think so, so I wanted to see if you had any advice maybe on what we could do to try and convince him that his viewpoint is wrong.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, hmm, it's not necessarily that the viewpoint is wrong. See, the thing is, what, to, to quote, to make it accepta- to make it like as if you're actually cheating on somebody, cheating on your spouse in the marriage, it's like not telling them, not telling him, not telling him or her about it beforehand, but it's like, you know, you, it's like you tell them beforehand and you get their approval, it's, it's okay, even if they don't want to be part of it. But not telling them, that's definitely like uh, cheating on them.<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that's another thing I would have to think about, cause, got a bit of a, couple of items of destruction that need to be repaired<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I just got, I just talked to that one friend I was talking about who, uh, saw your website, the 18 one, and it turns out he's, he's gay, he's actually gay and he fapped to, uh I mean he masturbated to, uh, Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hahaha, your friend's a fag.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': And I think he's...<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out for 15 seconds)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ...about that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I think in case you would definitely want to let him know that you are straight and you don't want that kind of relationship, and maybe, and you know<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I tell him just to get the hell away from your site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm not saying that, but like, uh, you know, you don't want that kind, you don't, I mean that's, that's basically confirmed on that note. So, uh, you want, you still wanna be friends but you don't, but you're not into that kind of thing.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I mean, he was looking at your site, like, the 18 site and he was in like, um-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Over 18.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': The over 18 site you made. The loveshack. I thought he was just like, you know, masturbating to Rosechu, but it turns out he was attracted to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *sigh* Uhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, I don't think I'll be friends with this guy anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, yeah, then tell him, yeah, to get the hell out of your house and stay away if you don't want to be friends anymore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Seems like you know too many gay friends mister.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh shut up.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris, you know how-<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's not my fault. <br /><br />
'''Another fan''': You know how cologne or perfume, you know, women wear that to try and attract men? Do you think that farts attract gay guys to each other?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Now that's stupid! Not only is that stupid, but it's gross.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Here, I'm gonna take that question and I'm gonna, I'm gonna take that question and spin that into something that's less weird. What would you say the best cologne or whatever a guy could wear to get a girl's attention?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I recommend [[Axe|Axe]] body spray.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh yeah? I think I tried that one time.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': That actually does it for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What scent do you use?<br /><br />
(All speak)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Don't you use ass body spray?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Mmm, love it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Does the Axe effect, does it really exist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Does Axe exist?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, the Axe effect. You know, they say in the commercials spray it and girls will come to you.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) and it works for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Has it worked for you Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, well, yeah, I, yeah I haven't got that working for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I think it's a scam personally.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I mean... I mean, Old Spice is pretty good. I had, I had like a couple of girls go up to me asking me for dates with Old Spice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I actually wore that Orion sent, uhh, still smelling it. So it will work Chris, you just gotta give it time.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Using the Axe.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Cameron but, isn't Axe spray for men?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': No no no no no no no, see, see I said a boyfriend, a boyfriend that I met.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, okay.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah. *laughs*<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That makes sense.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, silly, silly. I have a question for you Chris, what celebrities have you met?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Well what I'm saying is the Axe effect doesn't work. Okay, sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't actually met other celebrities in person, my real life, unless you count a local radio DJ.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I've met the DJ of my radio station 95.1 and [[Excel Saga|Monica Rial]], and meeting Monica Rial was just a treat.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ahhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was, it was good.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, she's pretty.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Maybe you should go to her and, um, maybe she could be like a contact for voice acting. I mean, you do pretty good imitations.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Do Homer Simpson!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Homer Simpson impression) Oh, look at me! I'm a stupid old person, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp, D'OH!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That was awesome<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Who else can you do Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What other imitations can you do?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, a lot. It depends on if you name it, I might recall, if you name the person or character I'll, if I can recall my memory than I will imitate that person.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Can you try Bender from Futurama?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I reckon I can do a pretty good Bender! I can twist off my arm and, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, um, since my girlfr-(clears throat)-sorry. Since my girlfriend broke up with me, I was just wondering if you could give me any tips to like, pick up y'know, another girlfriend?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) Valentine's Day is coming.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah. It's gonna be lonely without her, y'know.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah I know.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Can you help?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) No I do not know what tha- neither of them sound like in voices so I can't imitate them. (sigh) As for- as for dating advice uh, if you're- when you're going out to meet a woman, and this is like advice that's like it could've been taken from my, taken from my own advice I gave in the, the one in the video I did when I just turned 25. But it was definitely, it was given, but it was offered in this book written by a nine-year-old.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> When you're going to uh find yourself a woman, you just try to stay calm. And uh be polite, friendly. Don't uh let your nerves get the best of ya.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What should I say, what should I say here, y'know, to the girl?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Start with "hello" and "how are you".<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I ask her, should I like do a pick-up line? Do those work?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Um, sometimes. But I wouldn't, I wouldn't exactly count on it in a desperate situation. But I mean like uh, talk about yourself a little bit saying like, "Ooh did you read in the paper today about this article that really caught my eye?"<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was thinking about standing by the wall with a sign. Saying that I need a girlfriend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, don't- don't do that. That makes you look retarded.<br /><br />
(Laughter)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What about wearing a sticker that says you're single. Have you ever tried that? Do you think that would work?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what was that? A stick-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wearing like a uh, a sticker that says "I'm single".<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Wait a second I'm not done yet.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Oh I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I got that idea from your comic. I mean I thought it was a-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. I later learned that that, I already learned from my mother that made me look retarded. (Female fan laughs) To other people, so...<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Ohh. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So I stop- So I stopped- So I stopped doing that a long time ago and, I don't know (what payed attention?)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mm. Basically I'm running from others that have offered such advice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh yeah like John Tesh I remember that in your news dash.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. And also it's like uh there's an expression in my elementary somewhere uh, those who can't teach.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Um, I remember (unintelligible). Um, I was um, looking at um (something), how do you feel about Obama swearing in his book? Even read it out loud in the audiobook version.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hm. (rustling and typing in the background) Hm. Ah, yeah I heard of that, didn't care much, didn't uh give much thought into it so... Uh swearing yeah don't care much for it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': So Chris I was just wondering uh, like can you hear me?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I can hear you.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Uhh. Does wearing that medallion, does that attract females? I was thinking about making my own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) You could do what you want, to try and make yourself stand out. Um... But it depends on if you, it depends on other peoples' point of uh you I guess at this point, um... You might want to get a second opinion. I mean it's not like I can see you over da Mumble and uh say what makes you look okay and what makes you look NOT okay. Yeah, g- get a second opinion from somebody else in person.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What about you, do you think that medallion makes you look, y'know, more attractive to girls?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhmmm. Yeah. Yeah I don't know. I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah I think it looks pretty cool on you. So that's, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well you could try it, see if you could try and see if it works for ya.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Speaking, speaking of the medallion, I noticed you wear it on the outside. Have you ever done any replacing the chain on it to something a little more comfortable?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh no. It's fine. It's fine. I mean I'd say that this uh the necklace chain with the like a pair- like a pair of- like a pair of keyrings with a belt buckle on them.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm. Alright.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris in hentai, the uh guys- like the girls usually say no but the, the guy touches her a bit and she gets into it. I was just wondering if you think that really works, have you ever tried that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh. I'm sorry, could you repeat that?<br />
'''Other fan''': I said in hentai, y'know the Japanese um, kinda pornography-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Yeah-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': -usually, the, the girl kind of says no but then the guy starts touching her boobs or something and she gets real excited and gets into it. I was just wondering if you think that really works. Can you just make a girl excited and into you just like t hat?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhh... Yeah I don't think so. I me- I mean in most of the time I'm sure you would probably just, the girl would probably just turn around and slap you right in the face or kick you in the groin.<br /><br />
(Various pained groans)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, you were saying it's educational. I think I saw that in a porn too.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Uh. Also (unintelligible) asked "How far have you gotten with a girl"?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I've never even been on a first date in my lifetime.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ohhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> At this point.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris?<br /><br />
(Fans talk over each other)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I was suggesting uh Chris, I have family in Bristow, Virginia. I've been out there a lot. And you know, they're- I mean, people that I've seen in Virginia don't really like anime and things that much. Have you ever considered maybe trying to meet a girl in the west coast? Because a lot of people, especially universities are into anime culture. <br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) Yeah but I'm no- I'm not planning on traveling outside of my state. Plus I would prefer to keep it local.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(Everyone talks over each other)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but to see the world means to have to have the money to actually go see the world.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Well You just have to save up a little bit.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah. I mean you know, trains are good.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (strange incognizable noise)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Gas is cheap now.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': You can meet so many people just going on a road trip or just you know, taking the bus or something I mean it's not too expensive, it's cheaper than a plane- (Chris talks over him)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Yeah, I hear you on that. But I just like, you know, if I want to go on a road trip I'd uh, I would not like to go it alone. I'd like to have my sweetheart by my side.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Mmm.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': The point is you could always get a job. That's what I did once a-(cut off)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh.<br /><br />
(Fans talk over each other)<br><br />
'''Other fan''': -and I wanted to meet a girl? I got this t-shirt that says "ask me about my large and attractive penis" and I wear that to the mall and it works every time.<br><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
(transcribing end for now at 1:31:06)<br /><br />
<br />
<br />
{{Transcription}}<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 6|Mumble Chat 6]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 8|Mumble Chat 8]]|}}<br />
<br />
==Links==<br />
* [https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBWklfakp0TGdDSkU Download]<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
<br />
[[Christian's sex joke]] - Used during this chat.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_7&diff=163088Mumble 72012-09-28T02:02:19Z<p>Irisviel: </p>
<hr />
<div>'''Mumble 7''' is the seventh of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]], held on 13 [[February 2009]].<br />
<br />
Appears to be the genesis for the "Power" videos in which Chris attempts and fails to prove his [[I AM STRONG|strength]] and [[CWC Fighter|fighting]] [[Challenge For Clyde|skill]], though these would not materialize for several months.<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
* A fan talks to Chris about putting naked posters of girls and pictures of men up in his room up to find out if his friend was a [[homo]] as Chris suggested. He tells Chris that his girlfriend dumped him over the posters and his friend ignored all of them. Chris sees nothing wrong with his advice until Julie tells him that she wouldn't like that. Chris recommends sending an anonymous letter explaining the situation and utterly fails to apologize or show concern.<br />
* Fans point out that Chris shouldn't have to show and prove that he is straight.<br />
* Chris cuts a fan off to let Julie ask a question involving [[pedofork|shota]].<br />
* Fans ask Chris to turn his radio down.<br />
* Chris uses Wal-Mart printer paper & RSVP ballpoint pen to draw, and a 50-pack of Crayola markers to color. Refuses to use color pencils or Photoshop to color, saying he prefers the markers.<br />
* Chris talks about Omicron's redone version of [[Sonichu]], accusing him of plagiarism. Says that the difference between what Omicron is doing and what he is doing is that Sonichu is his. Agrees to let Omicron continue if he credits Chris with the copyright.<br />
* '''Julie is convincing Chris to make videos proving to Clyde how strong he is.''' Chris feels that the [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|dildo breaking video]] proved this. Fans say that Chris's dildo comes apart naturally for cleaning.<br />
* '''A fan recommends making a video showing off his fighting moves to scare Clyde.'''<br />
* Chris is asked why he would use a dildo in proving that he is straight. Chris says that he is straight for crushing it, fans call him a [[homo]] for keeping it.<br />
* Chris [[lie|denies]] [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|using the dildo]], and claims that it's now broken. Fan says it could easily be reassembled. Chris is adamant that it was glued and that it took a lot of strength to pull it apart.<br />
* When asked by Julie, '''Chris admits using super-shears from Cutco to break the dildo glue, claiming to use a lot of strength in the process'''.<br />
* Fans discuss [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]]. Chris insists that it was drawn in protest of [[ED]]. He says it was anonymous, as most women have long brown hair and her eyes were censored.<br />
* Insists that [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:AngelicainGod%27sEyes.JPG the Rule 34 of Angelica Rosechu] is masturbating and enjoying it, and is using her hand to do it.<br />
* Chris thinks Billy Mays is on Home Improvement.<br />
* Chris isn't doing anything on Valentine's Day, as Julie is not there yet.<br />
* Chris discusses the the No-Redheads policy in his [[Love Quest]]. Says that redheads don't attract him unless they are not natural redheads. No piercings or tattoos allowed.<br />
* Chris is OK with blue hair.<br />
* Does a terrible Marge Simpson impersonation.<br />
* Chris impersonates Comic Book Guy and Donald Duck.<br />
* A fan presents the possibility that AIDS was sent by God to kill the [[homos]].<br />
* [[Chris and Religion|Premarital sex being forbidden in Christianity]] is discussed. Chris fumbles for an explanation.<br />
* '''A fan pretending to be black says he believes the government made AIDS to get rid of black people. Chris says that that's the kind of thing a black guy would say'''.<br />
* Premarital sex comes up again. Chris compares it to using porn to practice and learn skills for later.<br />
* The fake black fan calls Chris on his comment from earlier about black guys and AIDS. He makes the excuse that someone else said it first.<br />
* Questions on Sonichu start. Sonichu doesn't wear clothes because it's a comic. Chris isn't sure how [[Blake]] sounds. He might sound black, he might sound like Shadow the Hedgehog. The fake black fan asks why the bad guy has to be black, also mentioning [[Silvana]]. Chris says that he doesn't have to be.<br />
* Chris gets annoyed about the pronunciation of [[Rosechu]] as popularized by the Old Narrator of the [[Audiobooks]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't disagree that the Audiobooks made Sonichu more popular that he ever did'''.<br />
* He doesn't mind fanfics that don't portray Sonichu in a bad light.<br />
* The audio goes low in the main chat and a fan has a private, unrelated conversation for a few minutes.<br />
* Audio comes back as Chris is admitting that the [[B-Manajerk]] was black in real life.<br />
* Chris doesn't watch the news, so doesn't have an opinion on [[Barack Obama|Obama]]. He voted for him because he saw a documentary where he saw more of himself in Obama, namely that he was an outcast at one point.<br />
* A fan says that you should vote based on politics, not personality. Chris says that he is a moderate.<br />
* Chris doesn't know what the financial bailout is. He says that he drew the [[Sonichu 8#The Elevator Gags|racist picture]] of Obama based on his father's joke, before he saw the documentaries that made him vote.<br />
* Chris will not agree or disagree with interracial dating/marriage. He would want a white woman, but he would be [[gal pals|friends]] with others.<br />
* He'd marry an Asian.<br />
* It's not yet known if Silvana will be a good guy or if she will lose her [[pickle|dick]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't know what he wanted to be when he was younger, he's just making it up as he goes along'''.<br />
* '''Chris is keeping the name changes in the comics for legal reasons'''.<br />
* A fan suggests Slaweel cursing Rosechu to have a dick. Chris gets upset before saying that he'll think about it. The fans think it's a great idea. One considers a talking penis for Rosechu. Chris says it's a stupid idea.<br />
* Another fan asks about Chris being sacked from Wendy's. He denies scaring the child with his Donald Duck impersonation, saying that he didn't make him cry.<br />
* Chris might release his DVD one day.<br />
* A fan says that Chris has influenced underground rappers such as Immortal Technique, who has sampled him.<br />
* Chris takes requests. Impersonates MC Hammer, Dr Nick Riviera, Peter from [[Family Guy]], Mario and Sonic, butchering them all and tainting our childhood memories.<br />
* More Sonichu questions. '''Chris won't upload [[Zapina]] [[Rule 34]] because she is underage and Chris is worried about legal ramifications'''. When he is reassured that this would be legal, he says he would consider it. He will also consider Sonichu-Rosechu anal sex. Rosechu would not clean the [[pickle]] with her mouth, she would clean it off with a washcloth. He would not sell the the washcloth on EBay.<br />
* Chris calls a stop to the potty humor displayed throughout the Sonichu questions.<br />
* '''Chris denies that [[Yawning Squirtle]] is a character'''.<br />
* Fans ask for a joke. He recites a dreadful rhyme about Videogame consoles. He then tells his awful [[Christian's sex joke|sex joke]]. Fans start to tell racist jokes about [[niggos|black people]] and Mexicans. Chris calls for a stop to this.<br />
* A fan says that his friend [[mass debating|masturbated]] to the [[rule 34|adult section of Sonichu]] and is now worried that his friend is a [[homo]], as they were drawn by a man. '''Chris says that this is what he intended it for''', and they are drawings of women, so his friend is straight. He doesn't masturbate to his own drawings.<br />
* Chris reassures a fan that [[Mass Debating|masturbating]] in the same room as another man isn't gay as long as both men are thinking of women, but he would not do this.<br />
* Chris offers no comment as to what constitutes adultery.<br />
* Chris says that he is patriotic. Asked to sing the national anthem, he instead mangles a few lines of "My Country, 'Tis of Thee". He then tells a 'patriotic' joke that is insensitive to Mexicans. [[Chris and Hypocrisy|The fans call him on his "no more racist jokes" statement from earlier]].<br />
* Chris does a poor impersonation of Mr T.<br />
* Chris says that if you are married, sleeping with someone else isn't cheating if you have consent from your spouse.<br />
* Chris gives more advice on homos and recommends Axe body spray for attracting girls.<br />
* Chris has not met any celebrities, only local DJs.<br />
* Does impersonations of Homer Simpson and Bender. The two sound identical.<br />
* Chris gives dating advice: Stay calm, polite, friendly and don't let your nerves get the best of you. Say "Hello, how are you" and talk about yourself. '''[[Barbara|His mom]] told him that standing around with a sign makes him look retarded. A female fan cracks up laughing and can't stop'''.<br />
* "Those who can't, teach"<br />
* Chris says he has never even been on a date. Rejects dating suggestions from fans.<br />
* '''Chris was close with Sarah "[[PandaHalo]]" McKenzie, but hasn't heard from her in over two weeks. He heard about the fires and doesn't know if she's still alive. When a fan adds that 108 people were killed in the fires, Chris responds to the entire ordeal with [[Chris and death|"It's OK though, at least I have a good woman who's willing to be by my side at this point"]]'''.<br />
* When pushed, he says he feels remorse for the the victims of the fires and is concerned that [[Sarah Cassandra McKenzie|Panda]] is dead.<br />
* He asserts that he didn't abandon Sarah for [[Julie]].<br />
* '''A fan says that if [[PandaHalo|Sarah]] isn't alive, Chris should take solace that her perfectly barbecued remains fed the survivors. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|SHUT UP!!!]]'''<br />
* Chris says that he cares about Sarah and Julie equally and wouldn't dump Julie as a friend. A fan asks what he will do to the survivors who ate Sarah. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|"SHUT UP!!!"]] and demands that he be booted.<br />
* Fans reassure Chris that Sarah is probably OK.<br />
* Chris does abominable impersonations of Uncle Ruckus from The Boondocks and Hank Hill. '''He sings "Don't Trust Them New [[Niggos|Niggas]] Over There"'''. He also impersonates Meowth and sings the Team Rocket song.<br />
* [[Clyde]] enters. Chris refuses to answer questions and leaves.<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
===Chris proves he is straight===<br />
'''Guy:''' Chris!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all! ''[echoes]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'll be damned.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh, Chris-[gets cut off by another guy]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh you know, can't com- it's uh, can't complain.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' How's construction of the site?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' [unintelligible] so Chris<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I...I need to ask you something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yup?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh... I put those posters, of the... Playboy and everything in my room, and uh, one of my girlfriends saw it, and she got mad at me for looking at other w-... other girls, and she broke up with me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh... I'm sorry to hear that. It could-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, she's calling me a pervert. I-I don't understand this.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Did you... did you ex- did you try to explain to her about situation between you and that guy?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I... I did, and I don't think she understood.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... well, you should try, you should, uh, s-... try, uh, you should try wr-, you should tr-, uh, do you know her email address?<br /><br />
[pause]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So, uh Chris-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' A-also, wait... also, uh, the friend, I was talking about, he, uh, visited, and [typing noises] he, uh, he went into my room, and didn't even notice the posters. He just s-sat in the middle, he didn't s...sit in any uh, part of the room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Huh. Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, uh... so, yeah, I don't know. I mean, my girlfriend broke up with me, called me a pervert, said that I shouldn't be looking at other girls, I mean... I don't know what to do now.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well listen, uh, answer my question, do you have her email address?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Umm... yeah, but she won't... she won't answer me anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm... ok, hmm. Here's what you can do, uh... Do you know your girlfriend's... any of your girlfriend's [[Gal pal|gal-pals]]?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm... well, you should try to... like wr- you should write out... hmm... hmm... here's an idea. S- Write a letter to her and send it via smail mai-, via snail mail, but don't write the return address. On it.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What should I write?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just like, you know, like, they, you know, this is... you know, this is... you, uh, you put your name there, and you, it's, and then you would basically explain the situation between you and that guy, and that's why you had the posters up, well that's why you put the posters up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't really understand what was the point of the posters in the first place?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[sigh]'' it's... ''[sigh]'' if he looks at... if he, if he is very interested, if he is, if he was straight, he would uh, look at the women. Very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But he didn't even notice them. He didn't notice any of the posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, then I guess he is a [[Homos|homo]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' W...well, um, he wasn't looking at anything, not even the guy posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Hmm... He's not blind, surely.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, like, what is he, is he like, uh...I don't know.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I don't know either, man. But, you know at the moment I would suggest you, uh, write the- write the letter to your girlfriend, send the mail, don't write your return address on the envelope, and, uh, mail it to her.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Also my mom saw the posters and she got offended, she's like really religious and st- she said that like, uh, you know, lust is a sin or some shit. Oh, like she said, she's like all against the, the uhh, the like, Playboy in my room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, your- apparently your mom hasn't been [beeps] that open minded that time. So, you know, give her time to reh-cover, she'll uh, she might op- she might open up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I don't think that was a good idea though, I mean, w-why did-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -you suggest it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I was trying to see if he, to, I was trying to s-help you figure out if your uh, if your friend was a homo or not.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I know, but, do you have uh, [Fans talking] Playboy posters in your room?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unclear] I'm very forward.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I have uh, poster of some, of uh, I have a poster in my room of uh, some uh, naked girls I got from adamandeve.com as a bonus.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Then, nobody says anything about it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[clears throat]'' Well, I didn't really have too many oppor- too many people in my room. So, it's kind of like in a hard to notice place.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Um, wondering, um, If you showed anyone, wouldn't they be offended?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe, maybe not, [Fan grunts] it just depends on their point of view.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I wouldn't want the same thing that happened to me to happen to you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I hear you there. Uh, just to so just sound clear... Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie, are you there?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ok, uh, would you be offended if you saw such a poster in my room?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''[breaks up]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, What will, what was that? [Echoes]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie'''</span> Yes I would, kind of.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well that's no problem, I can take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, see that's what I'm talking about, I mean...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, that's why I asked Julie right now, because I respect her. So, because she said that she would, I will take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I've been thinking, um...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you have... [unclear] Chris, I don't think you should look at other woman.[sic] In my opinion.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I see, Julie. Well that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I...I respect that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' She might get jealous, I mean, that's what happened to my...my girlfriend.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, that's fine Julie, I respect your, I respect that. Just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey, can I ask you a question? If uh, he's done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, uh, one more thing, um, you know I've been thinking, uh, I don't really think you need, you know, posters and stuff like,<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' to prove you're straight, I mean, if you're straight, that's all there is to it i-if, am I right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think you're right.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I...I mean, you shouldn't have to prove that you're straight.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> You're right.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I m-mean [line breaks temporarily] Y-you shouldn't have to reassure yours-self. You should just be knowing it, and nothing anybody says, should get very, uh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, it's ve-ah-very-but you see, I have like, I have that [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] in my room, it's just, so that like, you know, for in case I have any-for in case I have any random thoughts, on account really, to tempt me.<br /><br />
''[unintelligible mix of chatter from most participants trying to get their word in]''<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I mean, even if they're random thoughts, even if they're random thoughts, if you know you're ''positive'' about it, you shouldn't have to look at anything to make sure.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, usually.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay. Uh, moving on from all this homosexuality, uh, I have one question, uh- [gets cut off by Chris in the background] ...never mind, [fat douchebag?]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey, ah, let Julie ask a question, let Julie ask her question.<br /><br />
<br />
===7:08 Julie asks about shotacon===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, I was watching you on the Internet yesterday and, what's a shotacon?[slightly cut off]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...I'm sorry, uh-y, I'm sorry, you got cut off, what was that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> What's a sho-[cuts off again]-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...What's a...''short''?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Shot-[cuts off third time, pretty obvious she's saying ''shota'']-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dude, shota.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, shota.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ssshhhh...shota?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, S-H-O-A-T-A [sic].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, it's a word he found online.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, [baby?], yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never heard of that word.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I dunno, if you want to look it up, you can probably find out on an online dictionary...<br /><br />
''[pause, and a weary sigh from someone other than Chris]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'll-I'll take a look. Hang on.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I know some Japanese and I think I've heard that somewhere, like in a magazine or something.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, it's some of that Japanese shit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Probably is. Three moments, I'll look it up.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Okay!<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's radio is audible]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Whoops, that was the wrong one. The wrong bookmark.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' S-H-O-T-A.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I know, I just get the wrong bookmark for...place I wi-for like...dictionary-type website that I have.<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's keyboard taps are audible]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uhhh...Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, now that Julie's done with her question, I also had one.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' He has to find what that means first.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, ''I'm sorry''.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Shit, ah shit, I've just found it on Wikipedia. It's, uh, it's a ma-it's a Japanese name. It's a name of a person. In Japan.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Really.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a Japanese name. I think it's-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh no no, I think you're looking at the wrong thing, it's S- S-H-O-T-A-C-O-N.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> S-H- I mean- O-T-A-C-O-N? Shotacon?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's the same thing, just put C-O-N at the end.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I've read it in a dictionary before, can't remember what it means...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, oh! Okay, here it is, uh..."shotacon, sometimes shortened to shota, is Japanese slang of the phrase 'Shotaro Complex'"...uh..."that describes the attraction to young boys or an individual with such an attraction".<br /><br />
''[Disgusted reactions heard]''<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh my god, what the fuck?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' There's lots of sick people. Y'all are gonna get ricked?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Someone from 4 cent garbage came in and told us to look that up, I didn't-I didn't even want to.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess he's a homo...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Don't worry I banned him already.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Um, Chris, Vivian wants to know if you can like, turn your radio down a bit, it's distracting.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yes, please turn it down.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I thought that was quiet enough, here.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, no, the lady'll probably pick it up<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Alright cool. Merci.<br /><br />
<br />
===10:21 Another fan asks about art supplies===<br />
<br />
'''Another Fan:''' Okay, um, I have a question, um, I like to draw—interrupted by mumbling—I like to draw comics and such, I mean I want to start up a webcomic. What kind of materials do you use?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, like, you mean for drawing?<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well mostly I just use like, uh, paper without lines, like, computer printer paper you can get in, like, Wal-Mart, for an inexpensive price in multiples.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then I use like an RES—RSVP-brand pen with the black ink.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh okay, is it like, um, a gel pen or a ballpoint pen or-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like a ballpoint, it's like a ballpoint pen.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What do you use to color?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I use Crayola brand markers.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would like to—I would—I would—I would recommend getting the Super Tip 50-pack which you can also find at the Wal-Mart.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay. I-[interrupted by someone else on chat]<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's basically-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' At Wal-Mart I usually get the 24-color RoseArts. Those are—those do pretty good too.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhh, Vivian, just so you—just so you know, I'm using the microphone that came with Hey You, Pikachu for Nintendo Sisty-Four [sic].<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, yeah no, no offense, but uh, personally I prefer like, colored pencils and shit cause-[Chris mumbling is heard]-they're like easier to erase. Photoshop [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If you want to use colored pencils that's fine, I'm not, uh, saying that you have to use Crayola markers-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why don't you use colored pencils? They're really good, you should try one on like, at least one page, just try one. One page with just colored pencils.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But um, actually, you can—you can scan your drawings and then color—color them in like, Photoshop or something. [rest of chat murmurs in agreement] That looks really professional, and really good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I prefer using the markers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's just that I-I mean—I mean I've tried—I mean I've colored with colored pencils before, and I just feel best with using markers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I have a question, um, uh, the Hey You Pikachu microphone, how does that work on the, you're using that on your computer? Did you say?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah it's just, yeah, it's like you plug it into uh, into the basic microphone jack.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh, yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Excuse me, I have a nice little Plantronics headset.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Hey Chris can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah, hang on a second, uh... uh, Omicron, that's uh, you're basically, uh, you're basically plagiarizing here. You're even using, uh, parts of my original drawings to, uh, make up your so called real ones and, you're just—you're just parroting—you're just plagiarizing-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's dirty and illegal.<br /><br />
[Unintelligible mumbling]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, you said so yourself, you're being illegal. And plus, and plus I'm-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, isn't combining Sonic with Pikachu the same thing?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, but, but but also, look at this, also I'm looking at this site here, it said, he's claiming the copyright for himself, but he's, but he's not. I mean that's like, but he's, he—he says<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' You need to ban him immediately.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, ban him immediately.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh wait wait wait wait wait...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah maybe you should check-[interrupted by loud noise, probably Chris]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well he said that, he's saying that all of Sonichu material is copyrighted by him, when it's clearly not.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah but you use Sonic and Pikachu, and you copyrighted it-<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' He just offered to give you credit-[interrupted by noisy chatter]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean, I put, I mean, yeah but, I mean, I'm talking about the—the Omnicron [sic] guy here, that's like, just put this link here.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh he offered to give you credit-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes that's the same thing you did.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well no no, he, no-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We decided-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No he's plagiarizing MY Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We just decided [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris it's, it's a parody, kinda like Sonichu is.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but he—yeah, but he's saying, he said—he—on his front page he says, all Sonichu material-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah but he's, he just offered to change it, so are you okay with that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> By changing it to Sonichu X-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, he said he'll give you credit instead of claiming it for himself.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, uh, yeah I would appreciate that, that would be better, yeah, if... he changed that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Alright cool.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Problem solved.<br /><br />
<br />
===15:02 Chris talks about dildos to prove his strength===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes Julie.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you think you could tell everyone about my idea? And, since you're going to do it do you think you could tell everyone so they could look out for it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, your idea... um, oh oh oh, yeah, just basically a video of me standing up to Clyde and showing him how strong I am, doin' a few kicks for the camera or something-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, you should throw some punches, show him what you're made of, you know?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Kick, punch, it's all in the mind ''etc.''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I basically... I pretty much did that when I...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Let him talk, c'mon!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I pretty much did - already proved my strength when I... ripped that... ''dildo'' in half.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Foreign-Sounding Guy:''' Most dildos come apart for cleaning.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' C'mon.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but that thing was screwed together at the seam.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok listen to me...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris...<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' Eh Chris!<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ...could you do a like further test of your strength for me?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''stress sigh'' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I wanna see how strong you are please.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...That's fine, I can do that.<br /><br />
'''Other Fan:''' I mean that's ok, you showed your strength, but you should show her your moves. Like show her, like, what kind of moves you can do.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, let me tell you a story about how this'll work, ok.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' See, my, uh, one of my cousins, uh, this guy at school, kept, y'know, picking on him, calling him gay and stuff, and trying to fight with him, and my cousin told him to sss- y'know, one day, the guy said "Hey man, I'm gonna beat you up" and my cousin said "Look, if I show you some of my moves, I'll prove to you I can kick your ass in a fight" and so my cousin, y'know, he stepped back and, he took, uh, he took Tae Kwon Do, and he did a couple moves, y'know? He just stood there for like five minutes just doing his moves, and, y'know, some punches and kicks and... The guy just backed right off; he didn't even want to talk to him any more. So I think that should work.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> All right, well I'll try that. I'll try that.<br/><br />
'''Guy:''' All right. Sounds good.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br?><br />
'''Fan:''' You try- you always mention about how you're straight but yet in your video about you crushing a dildo, uh, doesn't that kinda like, y'know, not help your cause?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, it proves I'm straight because...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' But you have a dildo.<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I got it free with an order on adameve.com<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' But you ''kept'' it and shit. That ain't cool.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' What I don't... Why were there batteries in...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh yeah Chris, why ''were'' there batteries in it? Why did you keep it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I mean...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it wasn't an easy thing for me to sell, right off the bat, or even to make a profit, so...<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In fact in a way it's a good thing I kept it, cause it allowed me to be able to break it, like I did.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes but why would you keep it?<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why would you keep it?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I woulda saved it for my sweetheart, if she'd wanted it. To use it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Aaaahhh.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But if I were there wouldn't you prefer the real deal?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Some things that metal just can't replace.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Yeah.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I heard that.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' You didn't use it did you?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No I did not.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Did you just throw all the ones you had away?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I only had that one. And there you go, I ri- there you go, I broke it apart.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you just, like, ''take'' it apart, I mean, it did...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' ...seem to come apart, like, screwed on...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I did not take it apart, that thing was glued at the seam. I had to put a lot of strength into breaking it at the middle there.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, but I think, um, showing your moves would be better.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Right.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Clyde would mess with you if you show him you can kick his ass.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey, Chris's a muthafuckin' ''gangsta''!<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Blap blap.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yes, Chris will fuck Clyde's shit up.<br /><br />
(awkward pause)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait, Chris, didn't you say you used a - didn't you say you used scissors to break the dildo?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I pretty much did have to so I could break that ''glued seam''.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, I thought you broke it with your hands.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well I- yeah well I would have but it was dang glued at the seam, so I clipped straight in with the scissors I had.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a pair of Super Shears from [[Cutco]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(feigning interest)'' Huh.<br /><br />
<br />
===19:50 Chris defends his Rule 34===<br />
<br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, let's talk about something else. Uh, Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whenever the announcement of the adult Sonichu page, when I looked at your gallery, very nice stuff, you know, I see a picture of what looks like you with a Sonichu, uh, medallion. Like, and, who's that one girl, exactly?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Who, [[Megan]]?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I thought it was, like, [[Crystal]], cause of the hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, it was - it was originally drawn to be Megan but I censored her eyes to, uh, port- to protect her identity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Mmmmmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''(laughing)'' That's stupid! (?) That's so silly.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I drew that after I found the ED page in November.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you say that?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In protest against it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thought you were going to get rid of it anyway.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I tore up the original drawing, I, in- into squares, and I put in in an envelope.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you upload it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you do that shit? Like, and...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I understand Rosechu, but, like y'know, why, like, something that's from real life. That's the problem (?)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's not necessarily from real life, it depends on you inter- it depends on your interpretation, I mean it's hardly- I mean, '''most women have long brown hair, and the eyes are censored''', so...<br/><br />
(laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''Most'' women?!?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I remember in that one video you were saying it was Megan.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because it broke, because it end up, because it the end it broke up my friend - broke up my friendship eve, my uh, friendship with Megan.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um, can I ask you a question? In the third picture, with [[Angelica Rosechu]], what is... what's happening, is... God... doing...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nope. She's masturbating. And she's enjoying it.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But she has no hands there. How's she doing it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' She's ''enjoying'' it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But she does... She does...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah but how's she doing it? She doesn't have her hands there.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> She does have her hands, she's... ''(stress sigh)'' She's... like most women would be able to do the same thing.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thing it's the angle, Julie. I think it's the angle you were looking at it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah plus uh, the picture wasn't, uh, very - wasn't as clear as, like, you know, I would have liked to have had it, uh, I mean, I had that file for a while, and it...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah some of those are kinda blurry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, some deg- some degraded.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ? a good question, have you drawn anything... of... have you drawn anything like that with me? Cause I would actually like to see, if you did. If so, could you, and let me see? I, uh, sorry, that's very rude to ask.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm sorry, let me answer this guy. Yeah, well, I made a retraction video later saying that I- I disowned that address.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ah, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just after that guy hacked into it and changed to it to suck. And as such.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hang on, I'm gonna take a look at that... My Youtube...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I like this song.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What song?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' The song that's playing in the background of, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what do you think of, uh, what do you think of that guy who advertises products, Billy Mays? What do you think of him?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... Billy... Oh! Yeah he's an ok guy, I watched him on Home Improvement.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Billy Mays?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, that was another guy on Home Improvement, Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No that was the same guy. That was the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Really?!? Let's look up. IMDB, go. ''(sound of typing)''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Believe me, it's the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, I really enjoyed your, um, adult, uh, section of the site.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... okey dokey, very good. Aaahh, trying to figure out how to update the link on this thing here. Oh, maybe under here. Oh there it is, thank God (?), update right now.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(singing)'' You spin me right round baby, right round...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (joining in) Like a record baby, right round round round<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's a classic, I can't help in man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There you are, updated. It's finally fixed.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Actually that was Richard Karn on Home Improvement, not Billy Mays.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well my mistake, I mean the guy had the beard and uhh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh yeah I can understand.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And the voice sounds- and the voice sounds the same...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah. They sound the same.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There's a matter of interpretation apparently I misinterpreted so I will admit that I was wrong.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah see we all make mistakes, don't be too hard on yourself.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unintelligible babble or singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you gotten any fan art submissions or notable? For the uh- webpage?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I got one today... It's like mostly a drawing of that uh that uh- of the fan herself.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -got in the snail mail today.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -Sunday.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hmmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What are you doing for this Valentine's day Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhm... I'm sorry, what was that question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What will you be doing this year on Valentine's day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm depends...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ahhh, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm.<br /><br />
Fan: Surely a man of such magnitude as yourself are going to be doing something important, aren't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Magnitude? Way to choose the words buddy.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Vocabulary talent.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, cause I don't have Julie over here yet.<br /><br />
(Reactions of OHs and AHs)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If she was here...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible) -play games.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Or we could just uh... talk.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Ehehehehe. Maybe... uh... why no redheads?<br /><br />
'''Other Woman:''' Yeah?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I was trying to think about that when the other guy asked that question. Uh... I was trying to think up that unh... mmmm... Uhhhh, redheads just don't be very- tract me so much.<br /><br />
Several: Uh, ah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's- it's- a- pi- a possibility that they're dyed.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmmmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But yeah y'know natural redheads enh, yeah, just don't really turn me on as much.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I see...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you thought about girls with um, highlights?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... (pause) aaahhhh... what turns me on hhh- (inhales) (pause) obviously the women.<br /><br />
'''Man:''' Gotta have the women. (?)<br /><br />
'''Guy''': What about piercings or tattoo?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, neither of those.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhhh-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris! How bout like non-orange hair, not like... no, never mind. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... oh... okay... hmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait Chris! How do you feel about blue hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Blue hair's okay, otherwise I wouldna- Otherwise I wouldn't've liked Sailor Mercury.<br /><br />
'''British? guy:''' That is true, she does have blue hair.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' She's a very fine character. There is no way to deny it.<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Blue hair is OFF DA HOOK!!!<br/><br />
<br />
===28:35 Chris impersonates various cartoon characters===<br />
<br />
'''British??? guy:''' Doesn't Marge Simpson have blue hair as well?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (in some kind of insane voice) Oh yeah! Marge Simpson has blue hair and it's as tall as the Empire State building!!!<br /><br />
(Some HMMs UHs and UMs follow)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yo Chris!! Can you do some impersonations for us?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Oh we'd love to hear that!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just did Marge Simpson.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah you're really talented.<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(Several people talking at once)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> -they're really good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Do another SimpsonsChris, how about Comic Book Guy?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Mmmmhmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I'm very indeed. Oh aren't we all promiscuous and whatnot. I like Batman and Robin, oh look! Stan Marsh has come into the thing again - I forget that guy's name, that guy who did the Marvel comics.<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Stan Lee. (Pause) Chris do your Donald Duck impression.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Everybody have fun (incoherent and scary quacking)<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris you should work for Disney.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's good Chris.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Have you ever considered being a voice actor?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Errrrrp... possibly, I'm not sure.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (incoherent, cut off by Chris)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent... another cartoon voice)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris, you're a Christian, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I was just wondering-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahm actu-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -do you just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm actually a Methodist church.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome, I was just wondering: Do you think AIDS was sent by god to kill the homos or do you think that it's just an accident or something man-made?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thou- the thought never occurred to me... thought never occurred to me.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' can you do an impression of Arnold Schwarzenegger?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hold- the question...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Let Chris answer the question.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thought- the thought never occurred to me about what you just said about the AIDS there mmmm... but y'know, it's a possibility and I will not agree nor disagree with it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I was just wondering I mean, I've had that discussion with some of my Christian friends. I just wanted to get your opinion, thank you.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmhhh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think (clears throat) I think Omicron has a point and you did tell me you went to a methodist church didn't you? So that's-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well th- well my Methodist church is uh more loose on- is not as strict on uh- on uh sex.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris I don't know- I don't know that much about religion in the States but I don't think there is a looser Meth- Methodist church. God makes the rules Omicron says.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, hmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well, you know personally I think that the government made AIDS to kill off all the brothers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whoa, whoa... That's what the blacks always say.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. (pause) I'm going to agree, that sounds like something that uh... well, a black guy would say.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So your church is kinda of uh- they let you do- their kinda loose on the whole moral restrictions?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... (pause) uhhh... that's... what's the question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Your church they- you said they're kind of more uh- y'know they're less strict on the whole moral thing, like, as far as sexuality goes? Right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -ah basically.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But y'know, uhh, I thought you're supposed to listen to the Bible or whatever not, y'know, not necessarily- no, never mind.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (interrupts)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, there's also a uh, there's also a- think about this uh, if you uh- if you- if you were a think uh- you have to find for yourself a good meaning behind uh- good meaning behind watching pornography to uh- like teach how it- how to do this and that when you actually get around to doing it...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's all ???<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's all's considered education for yourself.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' How is that realistic at all?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, it's uh- not a really good thing to learn from, trust me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It can be done before marriage as well as long as me and my sweetheart really love each other very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But not in Christianity.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But all I'm saying is y'know, porn is completely, completely unre- unrealistic I mean you can't really learn anything from it.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It gives- it gives you enough ideas.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unclear)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (incoherent) porn.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' When you actually have sex, it's nothing like porn.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe not like you, you not gonna do it-<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' You can't do it immediately- immediately anal sex cause most women are not very happy with anal sex and also...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay, shut up<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' -and also weird-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Shut up.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Yes.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And... that wasn't cool, like...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That was uncalled for...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, like, suthin' a BLACK MAN would say...<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' That's racist man...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, somebody said it on here first before I did.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Does that make it ok?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, I think he's trying to make it clear that- I dunno.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I typically agree with that guy.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So nothing g- it doesn't make it ok.<br /><br />
(incoherent)<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling) I wi- I'm sorry, I take it back.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(unclear)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Guys can we get back to Sonichu, Please?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah this is getting ridiculous.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unclear) -Sonichu actually.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Anyway, my question is that: why does Sonichu not wear clothes while Rosechu and the other Rosechus do wear clothes? And underwear?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Aaaaaaaaaamp... It's like uh- it's basically a cartoon and it doesn't really matter, it's like... mm... think about this: Most cartoon characters wear at least one article of clothing. At least one article. And uh- it's like Yogi Bear who just wears a necktie and a hat.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 35.14)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Other Guy:''' I think it would be cool if all the Sonichus and Rosechus got together and they and- they all formed a big team and they had special uniforms or something, kinda like the X-men.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Or Power Rangers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh yeah, I don't do- I don't do well- I'm not in- no uniforms. It's a uniform and other Sonichus and Rosechus.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'm just wondering if you'd do another impression: What does Blachu sound like? Uh, Black Sonichu? Or Blake?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eeeeuuunh... Eh... ahhhh...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Can you imitate it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... I'm not sure... uhhhhm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Like does he sound black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Possibly, but I'm not certain. I'm not leaning towards it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I'd like to hear it, but if you don't want...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just never- I just never really thought about that. I'd say that he possibly sounds similar to uh, y'know Shadow the hedgehog. But he could possibly sound, black. He could. Don't quote me on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' All right, I was just wondering if you'd do his voice but...<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Hey why does the BAD guy gotta be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never said the bad guy "has to" be black. (pause) I mean, look at the- the range of villanies, I mean there's black and whites and uh... male females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I noticed that uh- Silvana's also... black lookin'.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just decided to color her black because she was born- she came from outer space from a black egg, which was the- which came out of the rainbow.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah, I was also wonderin' about that like-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I- I- I-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' If Silvana came out of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes it's-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Why would she be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' I mean like black ain't part of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like the black sheep of the family. Y'know you put all the colors together and it does become black.<br /><br />
(unintelligible reactions)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -like a brownish-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) is a (unintelligible) color.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Maybe it's because she's from space and there's not a lot of light in space and it's dark or something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah that- a uh yeah- that's one of the-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hmmm.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhm, did you look at the link of my friend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, ummmm...<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Yeah, since you love blue hair.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh- no I haven't looked at it and I don't wanna make Julie feel jealous if I did- if I went and did.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Julie would mind.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhhh...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You look at pornography don't you?<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' (mumble)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, that- that was two syllables "Rose-chu". You don't- don't add- don't say the "e" it's just "Rosechu".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah you went over this last chat.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>(I don't know, it sounds like "narrator")<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sounds like he says "narrator" again)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh... I was just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, well, obviously the uh- the narrator who did those audio books was incorrect. Specially since I never gave that person the approval to do the audiobooks.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think it's just a fan project and I think he-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' and I think he might have one of the West coast dialects. I know that the South they say y'all but over here-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well obviously he lied-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -different. I'd be proud if they made one of my projects into an audiobook though. That means that there are a lot of fans out there that really like it.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Ay.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' They're not selling to try and make any money off it. They're not trying to rip you off. They always made sure- they always narrate the first page by saying "Christian Weston Chandler" so they're not trying to cheat you or anything.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' The people know you're making it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I- I hear that. I just, apparently they misin- misinterpreted the (audio breaks up) name Rosechu. Or mispronounced it. Misinterpreted, mispronounce- fairly the same thing in that situation... possibly. To answer that question... possibly.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uh, Vivian said that the audiobooks made Sonichu way popular that- than you could ever ever do on your own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I will not disagree with the statement. And I appreciate her help.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris. Would you be offended if a fan wrote a fanfiction about Sonichu?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Faaanfiction... if it's- if it's not demeaning or makes them look stupid. Then it's fine- it's fine. (pause) Like I did mind when, shoot, what's his name? That guy... uhhhh... that guy that the uhhhh... did the animations, on his computer.<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' You did mind or you didn't?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Animations???<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think I know what he's talking about. Are you talking about the um...<br /><br />
<br />
(background noise begins)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' Well the original play was a Greek play. Where they're all y'know... Greeks... and crazy stuff happens and they're all runnin' around in togas. So if you ever wanna see the movie "A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum" it was a classic and it had some real classic people from the 50s and 60s in it. Kinda like "It's a MAD MAD MAD MAD World". Sort of a classic old school movie from funny old school world. First color movie type thing. But that'll be a high school play. You'll wanna see that. You might actually enjoy it. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
(inaudible response)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' You never know that might be fun to do. Well I guess that wouldn't work on the weekend then... you gotta...<br /><br />
<br />
'''(FOR THOSE OF YOU WONDERING WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON, IT APPEARS THAT THERE WAS SOME TECHNICAL PROBLEM THAT CAUSED ANOTHER MUMBLE CHANNEL TO BE RECORDED WHILE THE CONVERSATION WITH CHRIS BECAME BARELY AUDIBLE BACKGROUND NOISE. INSTEAD ALL THAT CAN BE HEARD IS SOME BUTTFACE YAMMERING ABOUT FILMS AND TELEVISION SHOWS. I'M NOT GOING TO KEEP TRANSCRIBING IT. CHRIS IS STILL TALKING AND ANSWERING QUESTIONS, BUT NOTHING CAN BE UNDERSTOOD OVER THESE GUYS.)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''(AT 42.56 THE AUDIO SUDDENLY RESUMES NORMALLY)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Unknown person:''' Uh you-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I uh- noticed he's another BLACK villain.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah in real life he was black. Without meaning any offense to the uh- black guy in general, cause you've noticed, among the Jerkops there's uh- we got black's and white's, males and females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(several people jump in at once)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) -you've never drawn a female officer before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well y'know uhhh... uhhh, comic book number 7, near the end. Near the end of the time travel episode. Uhh, I have no opinion about what Obama's doing cause I don't watch the news.<br /><br />
Accented woman: But you voted for him, didn't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes I voted for him because I saw myself in him when I com- when I saw both the documentaries and downloaded them for the Playstation Network between Obama and McCain. I mean voted for a person I saw more of myself of-<br /><br />
Accented woman: You usually vote for someone based on their political leanings, not how you view them. As I were Republican, I voted for John McCain. Not because I liked him but because I- he had the same political views as me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basi- basically I'm a moderate.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh, I see. Um, I was wondering. I was reading opinions: do you agree with his financial bailouts?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm, I don't even know what it is. So I can't disagree or agree.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Well, to make it short um, it's about uh- the government- President Obama is planning to uh- a new one- (cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You got cut off there.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uhh, ok, we lost him.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yo, Chris, uh, do you, you didn't just vote for Obama cause he was black, did you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I did not vote for him because he was black. I voted for him cause I saw myse- because I saw myself in him. In like, similar lifestyles. And I saw that he was a good man, I mean after all, com- I saw- I saw I watched both of the A&E documentaries, before I can- before I knew who I would vote for.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 45.29)'''<br /><br />
<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris:, Chris what did you see in him that you say in your self?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Like for one thing we were like outcasts, at least one point in our lives.<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Wait, wait hold up earlier you said that you thought he would probably paint the white house black.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh oh that was my father’s joke he said that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Is your father a racist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but you see I drew that for him before I saw the documentaries so respectfully withdrew that comic page.<br /><br />
'''???:''' does your father hate black people.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Not necessarily but it’s just how my father just how my father that does not reflect in any way that’s how he felt (annoying ass noise in the background)<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Man that racist.<br /><br />
'''??? :''' Hey Chris I so the ahh saw the Sonichu and Rosechu love sack that you put up and I thought if was pretty cool for (you adult friends?) I just had a question though: do you have any plans in the comic to have romance between you and one of the hedgehogs I mean-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Yelling) No no no<br /><br />
'''???:''' -we would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' I mean is was just wondering because there are fans how would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Now- now that you answered the his question my kind of relates to his what are your thoughts on inter racial breeding and marriages?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would not agree of disagree with them but in my personal preference I would fell- I would feel more comfortable in having a full relationship with a white woman but I am willing- am still willing to be friends and acquaintances and give and have respect for the black women as well.<br /><br />
'''???:''' What about Asians like Japanese?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I’m ok with them as well (yelling) a once.<br /><br />
'''???:''' So would you get married with a Japanese woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hhhmmmm I would have, yes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> but I’m giving Julie to opportunity here.<br /><br />
'''Clyde:''' Julie’s a lucky woman.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris, I was just wondering, is Silvana gonna become one of the good guys, like- like Black Sonichu did before?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There’s a possibility but I have not given that a co- I have not confirmed that yet.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Uh, is she gonna lose the male sexual parts and become a full-fledged woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhhmmm possibly but I haven’t given that- I haven't given that thought either.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Also um I was reading (?Phillip’s?) question, Chris what did you want to be when you were little?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don’t remember, I do not remember. I’m just making it as I go basically.<br /><br />
'''???:''' is there ever gonna be like uh, an end to your sonichu series like a finale?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hmmmm I don’t know, probably would not.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Oh so it keeps going and going?<br /><br />
???: You ever consider making comic about the history of CWCville?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhmmmm an episode dedicated towards that possibility.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris are you going to keep the name changes that you made or are you going back to the original names?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahhh ya I’m keeping the name changes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' But you know umm Nintendo was umm, y'know, they sent you a letter you never really talk about it further.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but at least- at least- the hel- they use to benefit me for the fact that uh allowed me to fix noting in that sense so I couldn’t be sued by such people in that sense.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 50 min)'''<br /><br />
<br />
(scattered reactions)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So the name changes were good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So uh, Chris I was wondering if uh Mary- Mary Lee Walsh Or I guess the new name: Ryam Sla- I don't know-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Sla-weel.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Slaweel, thank you. Uhm, if she were to use her magic to curse Rosechu with a penis, would Soni- what- wou- would that test the relationship between Sonichu and her? While they were fighting the battle to have it removed, I'm just curious.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... Firstly uh, she does not- she does not have the power ch- to do that.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I just thought you know, remember you did the story about 4-cent-garbage and drawing all the- the picture and-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah you what, that's one- that's one thing: drawing them, but not actually putting them on the character.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Cause I think that would be like an epic story though, like to actually have a quest-<br /><br />
Fan: I'll second that.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -to go to have that penis removed from Rosechu. I mean it's a test of romance between her and Sonichu.<br /><br />
(muttering)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And when that prevails and the penis is removed and everybody- everybody lives happily ever after. Y'know that would be awesome.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnnnnnh, I dunno I have to- I dunno I have to think about that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It is a really good idea. I like it.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I do too.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah, that's good.<br /><br />
Other fan: It could show just how much Rosechu means to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I'll- I'll consider it but I'm not making any promises.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' We understand.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(several talking at once)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -decided on that subject?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm working on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' If you actually decide to go forward with that story? Do you think maybe- maybe you could give her a talking penis?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!!!<br /><br />
(laughter from various people)<br /><br />
(unintelligible responses)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ok, I think- I think we've talked enough about that one guys.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I have a question that doesn't involve penises.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Anyway, my question is since we've been hearing lot of vicious lies and slander about this, could you confirm exactly why you've been fired from your job at Wendy's Chris? Cause we've been hearing all sorts of- of crazy things and we wanna know the truth.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmmmmmm... well, firstly, what have you heard?<br /><br />
'''Other guy:'''Well we heard that uh you... we've heard so many things like you helped a small child and you did a Donald Duck impersonation and you scared the child.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... also that- also that is correct but I did not scare the child. The child was tired, I was only trying ta- I was only trying to make the child feel better. That's a little amusement. But I did not make the child cry, the child was already- was just tired.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' So you didn't help them cut their food and... yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I did help them- help them get their food to- by giving them uhh, by giving them bags and a top for their baked potato boat.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris, when will um, the pictures of Zapina, appear on the um, 18 plus page?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that was a deleted scene! That was a deleted scene.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Why was it deleted?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basically, hhh... y'c- y'cant' really have it if you don't have Rosechu working to take the- working to take the pictures of herself up in the bathroom. Cause like can't have one without the other.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaahhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I don't know if this is a good question but there's something I wonder about that- we kind of have this DVD you made and... y'know, we never unfortunately got... but I'm curious um... do you ever plan to release it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I'd pay money for that, I think everyone else here would probably pay money for it too.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Indeed.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (breaking up) I wanna ask a question.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I hear it's also on YouTube.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris do you know that you've influenced the rap/hip hop community?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmh... uh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I just wanted to mention that because I saw some YouTube videos and it- and- and from some underground hip hop artists such as Immortal Technique and they've sampled some of your voice audio complaining about your struggles with uhm... with the school board, with the security guards and they were- they felt so empowered that they actually took those words and mad'em into a very powerful rap song. How does that- how is your reaction to that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhhhh... basically I have not watched those videos so... I don't have an opinion.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I will provide you a link to that, hold on a moment.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh that's ok, actually I uh, did sample one. The one where they basically played the parody from "Can't touch this".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, no, trust me it's waaay more serious than that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I still haven't heard of- heard of what you're talking about.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Nevermind.<br /><br />
(rustling and moving noises)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do an impression of MC Hammer?<br /><br />
(more clicking and rustling)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Can't touch this do do do doo do dooo Can't touch this! Do do do dooo do do do... can't touch this.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' That was- heheheh.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Awesome.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you- can you do Dr. Nick Riviera from the Simpsons?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> HIIII EVERYBODY!<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hello Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hi Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hi Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that should say Dr. Nick cause that's who I'm imitatin'.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''???:''' That uh-<br /><br />
'''???:''' HELLOOO EV'RYBODY!!!!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well that-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hi Dr. Nick!<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Thank you, I love the Simpsons.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do... Peter from Family Guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhenhenhenh... Hey Lois! Look at me! I'm just (unclear) you nose, and I'm eatin' your nose.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh that's dead on.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Oh would you- Omicron's been interested in tis- would you actually make a documentary like- like your other DVD but make your daily life?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... I'm... yeah I might but uh... I'm not su- I'm not sure bout it at the moment.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaaaaaaanh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris can you do Mario? You know from Super Mario?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hay paisano! How you doin' mistah hedgehog!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's very good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then Sonic- then Sonic would say "what?!?"<br /><br />
(giggling)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris do you have any plans to make a video of yourself taking a dump on a Hexbox?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No! That's gross.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Yeah that was pretty sick right there.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Let's ban him.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's bad enough I cut in half with an axe.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> and one of the elevator jokes...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Oh we remember that, that was a classic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And I earned a trophy for that.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmm...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Yeah, I remember that, it was destroying a Hexbox by cutting it in half if I remember...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' If I were to draw nude Zapina fanart, uhm, would you put them on the site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... uhh, your- you uh- free to draw them at your- at your own- own preference, but I will not be- I will not put it on the website because- cause- because I will not want to break any laws of having underage portrayals- portrayals of underage nudity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Isn't Dot a child?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry... what?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dot, from Animaniacs.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' So-uh- uhm- I think I looked up somewhere that um, drawings do not count, they're just lines on paper not like real pictures that are horrible.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah I believe-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Draw-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (cut off)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Those illustrations do not count as child pornography. Because with drawing it's art- it's artistic merit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Welll... I dunno, I guess it depends I have to- but- y'know you could do the drawing and I'll think- I'll consider it.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, would it be possible to get any pictures of Sonichu having anal sex with Rosechu?<br /><br />
(pause... thumps and feedback)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm considering that but...<br /><br />
'''Accented woman''' Who keeps letting this person in? You are very offensive.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -and and, if you draw those, do you think that Rosechu would actually clean Sonichu's penis off with her mouth (laugh) w-when they're done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nah, no, I don't think so, I think- I think- I think it would be unh- yeah w-wash it off with a washcloth.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Do you think then, at that point then they would sell the washcloth on eBay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!<br /><br />
(people talking over each other)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, no, no more potty humor, all right?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah alright, okay<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Unrelated to party humor, I want to ask that in your Springbreak uhh Issue of Sonichu you had an introduction of a, of new character, the [[Yawning Squirtle|squirtle]] and I wanna ask<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:''' (interrupting)</span> No, that's, no, no, no, that's not just a character, I was, I was not introducing a new character, I was just doing like a poster thing for a bubble speak under one, I thought I just draw some water type pokemon un-in there<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I understand but the thing is there is huge cult following for that character and I strongly suggest that you should capalize on that and, and make him to a main character<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eh... No, I don't think so<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's just sleeping Squirtle work- waking up!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, people just thought he was really cute and yawning Squirtle, I don't know, I heard someone say, man wouldn't it be great if he would be that [[Autistic|dopey]] sidekick that he'd come and they'd be like, like, he'd come in and say something silly after someone did something and they would be like "Squirtle"!<br /><br />
People laughing and talking over each other<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um...<br /><br />
???: Yo, it makes you *unintelligible* (Chris and someone talk over another)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yes Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I'm asking you about... Hm... Never mind, I lost my train of thought. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's okay. These guys made me lose a train of thought as well. Doesn't multiple inputs.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yes, kinda lotta control here. I might- I may have to... never mind<br /><br />
Silence<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I never lose my train of thought because I have a GPS tracking system on it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, that was a good joke. (chuckle)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, could you tell us a joke right now. Just any joke.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay, here is a fuck- here is a funny- here is a funny mind scream. Funny rhyme scheme... not to be taken literally:<br /><br />
On your Game Boy Advance SP<br /><br />
create 'yer MII<br /><br />
den play it on WII<br /><br />
with your PSP<br /><br />
hooked to your PS3<br /><br />
cause it's fun<br /><br />
see?<br /><br />
And never ff, and never play a [[Hex Box]] 360<br /><br />
Because it's stupid and you're not a dummy (in childlike voice)<br /><br />
Mock laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That is really good.<br />
'''Fan''': Chris is that something you made up?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I made that up.<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Chris, Chris, can I write that down and tribute to quote you that? Oh man, that's good<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) So you mean to type it up and you quote me on the rhyme scheme?<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Yeah, I'd like that. I've been thinking about making a quote book like a mini Chris quote book like something you could open and have a cool line to say when you're on a party and you're like right things.<br /><br />
People talking over Chris and Alucard<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, well I'm typing it up for Alucard, so...<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Thank you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, can we hear one more?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay well here, okay um, okay here is an [[Christian's sex joke|adult joke]] I once come up with a long time ago.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': This is going to be good!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright- Alright there's this married couple, Bob and Jane, and they've been- they were looking forward to having children. So, one night, Bob comes home from work, and uh Jane says, "Hi, you had a good day, dear?" And he sa- and she sa-- he says, "Nah, it's been a long day, darling" And she said, "Well, it's okay, why don't we go upstairs, and we'll have some Breakfast." And he says, "Breakfast, at Nine p.m.?" And she says, "Sure, you bring the MILK, and I'll get an EGG."<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yo, I heard that before, man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then later, they had a boy and a girl, Junior Bacon and Orange Juice. All Part of a Balanced Breakfast.<br /><br />
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif]]<br /><br />
Perplexed silence<br />
<br />
'''Fan''': Hey, Chris, how do you solve a Mexican tank?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Stand in front of it?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': No, man, shoot the guys pushing at it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fans''': Oh that's a good one.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' I got one.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get a bunch of [[Niggos|blacks]] in a car?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Throw some chicken in.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get them out of the car?<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Job application.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What do you call a beach of black people buried up to their necks?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Afro-turf.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I came up with one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what's the difference between a black man and a pizza?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': A pizza can feed a family of four.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': How do you stop black people from jumping on a bed?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, enough racist jokes.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Put velcro on the ceiling.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enough, enough black jokes.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, uh Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Sorry<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I showed by friend that over 18 site, and he said, that he um, he um, you know he, he masturbated to it. Does that make you feel (interrupted)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's good, that's basically the reaction I would be going for. Among the male ca... among the male population, being attracted to the women.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But those are your drawings, it's like, I think he's gay now. I mean, you're a guy and you drew those.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm drawing, I'm drawing female characters.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yah, but it's drawn by you and you're, like, I don't know. It's kind of awkward for me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris, I actually need to thank you, the pictures on that site, it looked like the camera was inside Sonichu's penis when Rosechu was giving him a blowjob. That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. I've always wanted to have a camera in my penis so that I could see that if I ever got a blowjob, that would be awesome, I just wanted to say thank you very much for that perspective. It's the first time I've ever seen it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': There's a question here on the site, oh sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, well I see it... no I don't basically masturbate to my own drawings.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But you're okay if other people do, right? Even guys?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You're okay if other people, you know, masturbate to your drawings? Even if they're guys, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If the guys are masturbating to the female drawings, then yes, that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I just thought it was kind of awkward, but maybe I'm seeing it a different way.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I doubt that, uh, having a whole bunch of drawings of naked female characters can be misinterpreted as something else.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Can I to ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': One time, a friend and I were looking at porn together, and we masturbated together, but the porn was straight, ordinary porn. Is this gay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I'm sorry, where you looking at naked women?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Yes, but we were in the same room, masturbating.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, if you both were thinking about the naked women you were looking at, then I would definitely say you both are straight, cuss you're not thinking about each other, you're thinking about the women.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Right. <br /><br />
'''Fan''': Would you do that with someone?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': I'm relieved.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Man, nigger you gay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Shut up. Would you do that with someone? Like a guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Nah, I'm straight dog.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I'd, yeah I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Omnicron has a question on here, on the side here.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You see it, or?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. That's not straight.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what about the earlier question.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, the one before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, which one before? Oh, you mean...<br /><br />
(All talk at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, what do you think about-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wait, wait let him answer.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Let him answer that one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was gonna rephrase it but okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'd say it would depend on your interpretation, what is adultery to you?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But, you know, isn't the Bible only supposed to be interpreted, it's the word of God, you're not really supposed to interpret it any other way.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': It is what it is.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's in English.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh, I have no comment.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, that's what my, uh, you know I was talking about my mom saw those drawings. I mean, not the drawings, the posters, the playboy posters and that's basically what she got bad about. She said I was committing adultery.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah okay, if you don't want to talk about it, fine.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, hmmm, I think you shou, I think you should, uh, when you, I think I can see where this could be interpreted one way or another, it depends on how you look at the woman. I mean, alright, you're looking at the, uh woman, you might imagine her naked, but, I mean, you would respe- I mean, you would, you would still respect, I mean, if you were still respecting that woman, you would appreciate her more for like who she was aside or in addition to the nudity, then that's not as bad as just, as just only doing it for the appearance.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's why, uh, that's why the playboy magazines, they give you the introductions of the women. It's like letting you know who they are (unintelligible).<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh but, yeah, but there weren't any, uh, descriptions under the, yeah never mind.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Thank you for the clarification Chris.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris, do you love America?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm patriotic.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's good. I was wondering if you could sing the national anthem for us?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [[Wikipedia:My Country, 'Tis of Thee| My country tis' of thee. Sweet land of liberty. Of thee, of thee I sing.]] I don't remember the rest.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Lands where my fathers died.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Land of the pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
(Fans all start singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Stop it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey I'll, I'll tell y'all a funny joke that's kind of patriotic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, you got this, you got this funny Mexican- you got this funny Mexican guy, and he just, he just come back home to Meh-he-co after an American visit. He's like (high pitched voice) Oh the people there are so very friendly. I mean, I go to the basketball game. I sit in the back row. I sit in the back row. And then, and then, and then all of a su- and then all of the sudden right before the game started, everyone turned around, put their hands on their chests, and they say, "Oh say can you seeeeee"!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I thought you said no racist jokes?<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': Yeah man, that ain't cool!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was a name, it was a name joke.<br /><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''':...Spanish language<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm kind of offended by that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': That's racist dog. That ain't cool.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': You laugh you support terrorism.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ¿Qué?<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What'd you say?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What the hell? Who said that?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Forget it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I said, you laugh, you support terrorism.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, he's gone.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Awful Mr. T impression) I pity the fool, who try and misinterpret things, and twist them around, and then jam new words into my mouth.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You do a good Mr. T<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah you do.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) no jibber jabber.<br /><br />
(Fans laugh)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, did you watch the A-team back in the day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No but, no but, basica- but I have seen Mr. T. And then I also, I also saw when he guest, when he quest starred in an episode of Alvin and the Chipmunks.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I saw that episode, he helped uh Theodore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Theodore was getting picked on, yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, you posted a link here.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well at my [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|Methodist church]], uh, sex before marriage is okay as long as, uh, she and I, we love each other very much and truly.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But that's what they tell you, I'm talking about the word of God.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *Sigh* Okay, I'm getting tired, okay, I'm getting tired here, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, but...<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, sorry, no more of that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, you're right. Please stay Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay. Alright, I'll stay a little while longer.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, if anyone does, if anyone asks anything that makes him feel uncomfortable, I'm gonna kick you out of the room.<br /><br />
(Everyone speaks)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Chris, could you give me some advice?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I have a Japanese friend, he's, he's actually 26 and he's never had a girlfriend and we asked him some questions, just joking around one day. And we asked him if his, when he gets married, if his wife wanted to sleep with another man, would he be okay with it, and he actually said yes, as long as she wasn't being forced. Now that kind of bothered us, because us Americans, right, we think that marriage, and you know you're with somebody, they should be faithful, but he doesn't seem to think so, so I wanted to see if you had any advice maybe on what we could do to try and convince him that his viewpoint is wrong.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, hmm, it's not necessarily that the viewpoint is wrong. See, the thing is, what, to, to quote, to make it accepta- to make it like as if you're actually cheating on somebody, cheating on your spouse in the marriage, it's like not telling them, not telling him, not telling him or her about it beforehand, but it's like, you know, you, it's like you tell them beforehand and you get their approval, it's, it's okay, even if they don't want to be part of it. But not telling them, that's definitely like uh, cheating on them.<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that's another thing I would have to think about, cause, got a bit of a, couple of items of destruction that need to be repaired<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I just got, I just talked to that one friend I was talking about who, uh, saw your website, the 18 one, and it turns out he's, he's gay, he's actually gay and he fapped to, uh I mean he masturbated to, uh, Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hahaha, your friend's a fag.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': And I think he's...<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out for 15 seconds)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ...about that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I think in case you would definitely want to let him know that you are straight and you don't want that kind of relationship, and maybe, and you know<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I tell him just to get the hell away from your site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm not saying that, but like, uh, you know, you don't want that kind, you don't, I mean that's, that's basically confirmed on that note. So, uh, you want, you still wanna be friends but you don't, but you're not into that kind of thing.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I mean, he was looking at your site, like, the 18 site and he was in like, um-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Over 18.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': The over 18 site you made. The loveshack. I thought he was just like, you know, masturbating to Rosechu, but it turns out he was attracted to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *sigh* Uhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, I don't think I'll be friends with this guy anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, yeah, then tell him, yeah, to get the hell out of your house and stay away if you don't want to be friends anymore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Seems like you know too many gay friends mister.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh shut up.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris, you know how-<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's not my fault. <br /><br />
'''Another fan''': You know how cologne or perfume, you know, women wear that to try and attract men? Do you think that farts attract gay guys to each other?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Now that's stupid! Not only is that stupid, but it's gross.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Here, I'm gonna take that question and I'm gonna, I'm gonna take that question and spin that into something that's less weird. What would you say the best cologne or whatever a guy could wear to get a girl's attention?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I recommend [[Axe|Axe]] body spray.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh yeah? I think I tried that one time.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': That actually does it for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What scent do you use?<br /><br />
(All speak)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Don't you use ass body spray?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Mmm, love it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Does the Axe effect, does it really exist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Does Axe exist?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, the Axe effect. You know, they say in the commercials spray it and girls will come to you.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) and it works for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Has it worked for you Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, well, yeah, I, yeah I haven't got that working for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I think it's a scam personally.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I mean... I mean, Old Spice is pretty good. I had, I had like a couple of girls go up to me asking me for dates with Old Spice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I actually wore that Orion sent, uhh, still smelling it. So it will work Chris, you just gotta give it time.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Using the Axe.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Cameron but, isn't Axe spray for men?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': No no no no no no no, see, see I said a boyfriend, a boyfriend that I met.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, okay.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah. *laughs*<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That makes sense.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, silly, silly. I have a question for you Chris, what celebrities have you met?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Well what I'm saying is the Axe effect doesn't work. Okay, sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't actually met other celebrities in person, my real life, unless you count a local radio DJ.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I've met the DJ of my radio station 95.1 and [[Excel Saga|Monica Rial]], and meeting Monica Rial was just a treat.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ahhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was, it was good.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, she's pretty.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Maybe you should go to her and, um, maybe she could be like a contact for voice acting. I mean, you do pretty good imitations.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Do Homer Simpson!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Homer Simpson impression) Oh, look at me! I'm a stupid old person, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp, D'OH!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That was awesome<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Who else can you do Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What other imitations can you do?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, a lot. It depends on if you name it, I might recall, if you name the person or character I'll, if I can recall my memory than I will imitate that person.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Can you try Bender from Futurama?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I reckon I can do a pretty good Bender! I can twist off my arm and, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, um, since my girlfr-(clears throat)-sorry. Since my girlfriend broke up with me, I was just wondering if you could give me any tips to like, pick up y'know, another girlfriend?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) Valentine's Day is coming.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah. It's gonna be lonely without her, y'know.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah I know.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Can you help?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) No I do not know what tha- neither of them sound like in voices so I can't imitate them. (sigh) As for- as for dating advice uh, if you're- when you're going out to meet a woman, and this is like advice that's like it could've been taken from my, taken from my own advice I gave in the, the one in the video I did when I just turned 25. But it was definitely, it was given, but it was offered in this book written by a nine-year-old.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> When you're going to uh find yourself a woman, you just try to stay calm. And uh be polite, friendly. Don't uh let your nerves get the best of ya.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What should I say, what should I say here, y'know, to the girl?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Start with "hello" and "how are you".<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I ask her, should I like do a pick-up line? Do those work?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Um, sometimes. But I wouldn't, I wouldn't exactly count on it in a desperate situation. But I mean like uh, talk about yourself a little bit saying like, "Ooh did you read in the paper today about this article that really caught my eye?"<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was thinking about standing by the wall with a sign. Saying that I need a girlfriend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, don't- don't do that. That makes you look retarded.<br /><br />
(Laughter)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What about wearing a sticker that says you're single. Have you ever tried that? Do you think that would work?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what was that? A stick-<br />
'''Other fan''': Wearing like a uh, a sticker that says "I'm single".<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Wait a second I'm not done yet.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Oh I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I got that idea from your comic. I mean I thought it was a-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. I later learned that that, I already learned from my mother that made me look retarded. (Female fan laughs) To other people, so...<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Ohh. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So I stop- So I stopped- So I stopped doing that a long time ago and, I don't know (what payed attention?)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mm. Basically I'm running from others that have offered such advice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Oh yeah like John Tesh I remember that in your news dash.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. And also it's like uh there's an expression in my elementary somewhere uh, those who can't teach.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Um, I remember (unintelligible). Um, I was um, looking at um (something), how do you feel about Obama swearing in his book? Even read it out loud in the audiobook version.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hm. (rustling and typing in the background) Hm. Ah, yeah I heard of that, didn't care much, didn't uh give much thought into it so... Uh swearing yeah don't care much for it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': So Chris I was just wondering uh, like can you hear me?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I can hear you.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Uhh. Does wearing that medallion, does that attract females? I was thinking about making my own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) You could do what you want, to try and make yourself stand out. Um... But it depends on if you, it depends on other peoples' point of uh you I guess at this point, um... You might want to get a second opinion. I mean it's not like I can see you over da Mumble and uh say what makes you look okay and what makes you look NOT okay. Yeah, g- get a second opinion from somebody else in person.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What about you, do you think that medallion makes you look, y'know, more attractive to girls?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhmmm. Yeah. Yeah I don't know. I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah I think it looks pretty cool on you. So that's, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well you could try it, see if you could try and see if it works for ya.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Speaking, speaking of the medallion, I noticed you wear it on the outside. Have you ever done any replacing the chain on it to something a little more comfortable?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh no. It's fine. It's fine. I mean I'd say that this uh the necklace chain with the like a pair- like a pair of- like a pair of keyrings with a belt buckle on them.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Mm. Alright.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris in hentai, the uh guys- like the girls usually say no but the, the guy touches her a bit and she gets into it. I was just wondering if you think that really works, have you ever tried that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh. I'm sorry, could you repeat that?<br />
'''Other fan''': I said in hentai, y'know the Japanese um, kinda pornography-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Yeah-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': -usually, the, the girl kind of says no but then the guy starts touching her boobs or something and she gets real excited and gets into it. I was just wondering if you think that really works. Can you just make a girl excited and into you just like t hat?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhh... Yeah I don't think so. I me- I mean in most of the time I'm sure you would probably just, the girl would probably just turn around and slap you right in the face or kick you in the groin.<br /><br />
(Various pained groans)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, you were saying it's educational. I think I saw that in a porn too.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Uh. Also (unintelligible) asked "How far have you gotten with a girl"?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I've never even been on a first date in my lifetime.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ohhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> At this point.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris?<br /><br />
(Fans talk over each other)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I was suggesting uh Chris, I have family in Bristow, Virginia. I've been out there a lot. And you know, they're- I mean, people that I've seen in Virginia don't really like anime and things that much. Have you ever considered maybe trying to meet a girl in the west coast? Because a lot of people, especially universities are into anime culture. <br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) Yeah but I'm no- I'm not planning on traveling outside of my state. Plus I would prefer to keep it local.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(Everyone talks over each other)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but to see the world means to have to have the money to actually go see the world.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Well You just have to save up a little bit.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah. I mean you know, trains are good.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (strange incognizable noise)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Gas is cheap now.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': You can meet so many people just going on a road trip or just you know, taking the bus or something I mean it's not too expensive, it's cheaper than a plane- (Chris talks over him)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Yeah, I hear you on that. But I just like, you know, if I want to go on a road trip I'd uh, I would not like to go it alone. I'd like to have my sweetheart by my side.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Mmm.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': The point is you could always get a job. That's what I did once a-(cut off)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh.<br /><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
(transcribing end for now at 1:31:06)<br /><br />
<br />
<br />
{{Transcription}}<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 6|Mumble Chat 6]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 8|Mumble Chat 8]]|}}<br />
<br />
==Links==<br />
* [https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBWklfakp0TGdDSkU Download]<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
<br />
[[Christian's sex joke]] - Used during this chat.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_7&diff=163087Mumble 72012-09-28T01:55:30Z<p>Irisviel: </p>
<hr />
<div>'''Mumble 7''' is the seventh of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]], held on 13 [[February 2009]].<br />
<br />
Appears to be the genesis for the "Power" videos in which Chris attempts and fails to prove his [[I AM STRONG|strength]] and [[CWC Fighter|fighting]] [[Challenge For Clyde|skill]], though these would not materialize for several months.<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
* A fan talks to Chris about putting naked posters of girls and pictures of men up in his room up to find out if his friend was a [[homo]] as Chris suggested. He tells Chris that his girlfriend dumped him over the posters and his friend ignored all of them. Chris sees nothing wrong with his advice until Julie tells him that she wouldn't like that. Chris recommends sending an anonymous letter explaining the situation and utterly fails to apologize or show concern.<br />
* Fans point out that Chris shouldn't have to show and prove that he is straight.<br />
* Chris cuts a fan off to let Julie ask a question involving [[pedofork|shota]].<br />
* Fans ask Chris to turn his radio down.<br />
* Chris uses Wal-Mart printer paper & RSVP ballpoint pen to draw, and a 50-pack of Crayola markers to color. Refuses to use color pencils or Photoshop to color, saying he prefers the markers.<br />
* Chris talks about Omicron's redone version of [[Sonichu]], accusing him of plagiarism. Says that the difference between what Omicron is doing and what he is doing is that Sonichu is his. Agrees to let Omicron continue if he credits Chris with the copyright.<br />
* '''Julie is convincing Chris to make videos proving to Clyde how strong he is.''' Chris feels that the [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|dildo breaking video]] proved this. Fans say that Chris's dildo comes apart naturally for cleaning.<br />
* '''A fan recommends making a video showing off his fighting moves to scare Clyde.'''<br />
* Chris is asked why he would use a dildo in proving that he is straight. Chris says that he is straight for crushing it, fans call him a [[homo]] for keeping it.<br />
* Chris [[lie|denies]] [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|using the dildo]], and claims that it's now broken. Fan says it could easily be reassembled. Chris is adamant that it was glued and that it took a lot of strength to pull it apart.<br />
* When asked by Julie, '''Chris admits using super-shears from Cutco to break the dildo glue, claiming to use a lot of strength in the process'''.<br />
* Fans discuss [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]]. Chris insists that it was drawn in protest of [[ED]]. He says it was anonymous, as most women have long brown hair and her eyes were censored.<br />
* Insists that [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:AngelicainGod%27sEyes.JPG the Rule 34 of Angelica Rosechu] is masturbating and enjoying it, and is using her hand to do it.<br />
* Chris thinks Billy Mays is on Home Improvement.<br />
* Chris isn't doing anything on Valentine's Day, as Julie is not there yet.<br />
* Chris discusses the the No-Redheads policy in his [[Love Quest]]. Says that redheads don't attract him unless they are not natural redheads. No piercings or tattoos allowed.<br />
* Chris is OK with blue hair.<br />
* Does a terrible Marge Simpson impersonation.<br />
* Chris impersonates Comic Book Guy and Donald Duck.<br />
* A fan presents the possibility that AIDS was sent by God to kill the [[homos]].<br />
* [[Chris and Religion|Premarital sex being forbidden in Christianity]] is discussed. Chris fumbles for an explanation.<br />
* '''A fan pretending to be black says he believes the government made AIDS to get rid of black people. Chris says that that's the kind of thing a black guy would say'''.<br />
* Premarital sex comes up again. Chris compares it to using porn to practice and learn skills for later.<br />
* The fake black fan calls Chris on his comment from earlier about black guys and AIDS. He makes the excuse that someone else said it first.<br />
* Questions on Sonichu start. Sonichu doesn't wear clothes because it's a comic. Chris isn't sure how [[Blake]] sounds. He might sound black, he might sound like Shadow the Hedgehog. The fake black fan asks why the bad guy has to be black, also mentioning [[Silvana]]. Chris says that he doesn't have to be.<br />
* Chris gets annoyed about the pronunciation of [[Rosechu]] as popularized by the Old Narrator of the [[Audiobooks]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't disagree that the Audiobooks made Sonichu more popular that he ever did'''.<br />
* He doesn't mind fanfics that don't portray Sonichu in a bad light.<br />
* The audio goes low in the main chat and a fan has a private, unrelated conversation for a few minutes.<br />
* Audio comes back as Chris is admitting that the [[B-Manajerk]] was black in real life.<br />
* Chris doesn't watch the news, so doesn't have an opinion on [[Barack Obama|Obama]]. He voted for him because he saw a documentary where he saw more of himself in Obama, namely that he was an outcast at one point.<br />
* A fan says that you should vote based on politics, not personality. Chris says that he is a moderate.<br />
* Chris doesn't know what the financial bailout is. He says that he drew the [[Sonichu 8#The Elevator Gags|racist picture]] of Obama based on his father's joke, before he saw the documentaries that made him vote.<br />
* Chris will not agree or disagree with interracial dating/marriage. He would want a white woman, but he would be [[gal pals|friends]] with others.<br />
* He'd marry an Asian.<br />
* It's not yet known if Silvana will be a good guy or if she will lose her [[pickle|dick]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't know what he wanted to be when he was younger, he's just making it up as he goes along'''.<br />
* '''Chris is keeping the name changes in the comics for legal reasons'''.<br />
* A fan suggests Slaweel cursing Rosechu to have a dick. Chris gets upset before saying that he'll think about it. The fans think it's a great idea. One considers a talking penis for Rosechu. Chris says it's a stupid idea.<br />
* Another fan asks about Chris being sacked from Wendy's. He denies scaring the child with his Donald Duck impersonation, saying that he didn't make him cry.<br />
* Chris might release his DVD one day.<br />
* A fan says that Chris has influenced underground rappers such as Immortal Technique, who has sampled him.<br />
* Chris takes requests. Impersonates MC Hammer, Dr Nick Riviera, Peter from [[Family Guy]], Mario and Sonic, butchering them all and tainting our childhood memories.<br />
* More Sonichu questions. '''Chris won't upload [[Zapina]] [[Rule 34]] because she is underage and Chris is worried about legal ramifications'''. When he is reassured that this would be legal, he says he would consider it. He will also consider Sonichu-Rosechu anal sex. Rosechu would not clean the [[pickle]] with her mouth, she would clean it off with a washcloth. He would not sell the the washcloth on EBay.<br />
* Chris calls a stop to the potty humor displayed throughout the Sonichu questions.<br />
* '''Chris denies that [[Yawning Squirtle]] is a character'''.<br />
* Fans ask for a joke. He recites a dreadful rhyme about Videogame consoles. He then tells his awful [[Christian's sex joke|sex joke]]. Fans start to tell racist jokes about [[niggos|black people]] and Mexicans. Chris calls for a stop to this.<br />
* A fan says that his friend [[mass debating|masturbated]] to the [[rule 34|adult section of Sonichu]] and is now worried that his friend is a [[homo]], as they were drawn by a man. '''Chris says that this is what he intended it for''', and they are drawings of women, so his friend is straight. He doesn't masturbate to his own drawings.<br />
* Chris reassures a fan that [[Mass Debating|masturbating]] in the same room as another man isn't gay as long as both men are thinking of women, but he would not do this.<br />
* Chris offers no comment as to what constitutes adultery.<br />
* Chris says that he is patriotic. Asked to sing the national anthem, he instead mangles a few lines of "My Country, 'Tis of Thee". He then tells a 'patriotic' joke that is insensitive to Mexicans. [[Chris and Hypocrisy|The fans call him on his "no more racist jokes" statement from earlier]].<br />
* Chris does a poor impersonation of Mr T.<br />
* Chris says that if you are married, sleeping with someone else isn't cheating if you have consent from your spouse.<br />
* Chris gives more advice on homos and recommends Axe body spray for attracting girls.<br />
* Chris has not met any celebrities, only local DJs.<br />
* Does impersonations of Homer Simpson and Bender. The two sound identical.<br />
* Chris gives dating advice: Stay calm, polite, friendly and don't let your nerves get the best of you. Say "Hello, how are you" and talk about yourself. '''[[Barbara|His mom]] told him that standing around with a sign makes him look retarded. A female fan cracks up laughing and can't stop'''.<br />
* "Those who can't, teach"<br />
* Chris says he has never even been on a date. Rejects dating suggestions from fans.<br />
* '''Chris was close with Sarah "[[PandaHalo]]" McKenzie, but hasn't heard from her in over two weeks. He heard about the fires and doesn't know if she's still alive. When a fan adds that 108 people were killed in the fires, Chris responds to the entire ordeal with [[Chris and death|"It's OK though, at least I have a good woman who's willing to be by my side at this point"]]'''.<br />
* When pushed, he says he feels remorse for the the victims of the fires and is concerned that [[Sarah Cassandra McKenzie|Panda]] is dead.<br />
* He asserts that he didn't abandon Sarah for [[Julie]].<br />
* '''A fan says that if [[PandaHalo|Sarah]] isn't alive, Chris should take solace that her perfectly barbecued remains fed the survivors. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|SHUT UP!!!]]'''<br />
* Chris says that he cares about Sarah and Julie equally and wouldn't dump Julie as a friend. A fan asks what he will do to the survivors who ate Sarah. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|"SHUT UP!!!"]] and demands that he be booted.<br />
* Fans reassure Chris that Sarah is probably OK.<br />
* Chris does abominable impersonations of Uncle Ruckus from The Boondocks and Hank Hill. '''He sings "Don't Trust Them New [[Niggos|Niggas]] Over There"'''. He also impersonates Meowth and sings the Team Rocket song.<br />
* [[Clyde]] enters. Chris refuses to answer questions and leaves.<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
===Chris proves he is straight===<br />
'''Guy:''' Chris!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all! ''[echoes]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'll be damned.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh, Chris-[gets cut off by another guy]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh you know, can't com- it's uh, can't complain.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' How's construction of the site?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' [unintelligible] so Chris<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I...I need to ask you something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yup?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh... I put those posters, of the... Playboy and everything in my room, and uh, one of my girlfriends saw it, and she got mad at me for looking at other w-... other girls, and she broke up with me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh... I'm sorry to hear that. It could-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, she's calling me a pervert. I-I don't understand this.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Did you... did you ex- did you try to explain to her about situation between you and that guy?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I... I did, and I don't think she understood.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... well, you should try, you should, uh, s-... try, uh, you should try wr-, you should tr-, uh, do you know her email address?<br /><br />
[pause]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So, uh Chris-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' A-also, wait... also, uh, the friend, I was talking about, he, uh, visited, and [typing noises] he, uh, he went into my room, and didn't even notice the posters. He just s-sat in the middle, he didn't s...sit in any uh, part of the room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Huh. Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, uh... so, yeah, I don't know. I mean, my girlfriend broke up with me, called me a pervert, said that I shouldn't be looking at other girls, I mean... I don't know what to do now.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well listen, uh, answer my question, do you have her email address?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Umm... yeah, but she won't... she won't answer me anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm... ok, hmm. Here's what you can do, uh... Do you know your girlfriend's... any of your girlfriend's [[Gal pal|gal-pals]]?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm... well, you should try to... like wr- you should write out... hmm... hmm... here's an idea. S- Write a letter to her and send it via smail mai-, via snail mail, but don't write the return address. On it.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What should I write?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just like, you know, like, they, you know, this is... you know, this is... you, uh, you put your name there, and you, it's, and then you would basically explain the situation between you and that guy, and that's why you had the posters up, well that's why you put the posters up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't really understand what was the point of the posters in the first place?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[sigh]'' it's... ''[sigh]'' if he looks at... if he, if he is very interested, if he is, if he was straight, he would uh, look at the women. Very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But he didn't even notice them. He didn't notice any of the posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, then I guess he is a [[Homos|homo]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' W...well, um, he wasn't looking at anything, not even the guy posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Hmm... He's not blind, surely.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, like, what is he, is he like, uh...I don't know.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I don't know either, man. But, you know at the moment I would suggest you, uh, write the- write the letter to your girlfriend, send the mail, don't write your return address on the envelope, and, uh, mail it to her.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Also my mom saw the posters and she got offended, she's like really religious and st- she said that like, uh, you know, lust is a sin or some shit. Oh, like she said, she's like all against the, the uhh, the like, Playboy in my room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, your- apparently your mom hasn't been [beeps] that open minded that time. So, you know, give her time to reh-cover, she'll uh, she might op- she might open up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I don't think that was a good idea though, I mean, w-why did-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -you suggest it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I was trying to see if he, to, I was trying to s-help you figure out if your uh, if your friend was a homo or not.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I know, but, do you have uh, [Fans talking] Playboy posters in your room?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unclear] I'm very forward.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I have uh, poster of some, of uh, I have a poster in my room of uh, some uh, naked girls I got from adamandeve.com as a bonus.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Then, nobody says anything about it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[clears throat]'' Well, I didn't really have too many oppor- too many people in my room. So, it's kind of like in a hard to notice place.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Um, wondering, um, If you showed anyone, wouldn't they be offended?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe, maybe not, [Fan grunts] it just depends on their point of view.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I wouldn't want the same thing that happened to me to happen to you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I hear you there. Uh, just to so just sound clear... Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie, are you there?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ok, uh, would you be offended if you saw such a poster in my room?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''[breaks up]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, What will, what was that? [Echoes]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie'''</span> Yes I would, kind of.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well that's no problem, I can take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, see that's what I'm talking about, I mean...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, that's why I asked Julie right now, because I respect her. So, because she said that she would, I will take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I've been thinking, um...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you have... [unclear] Chris, I don't think you should look at other woman.[sic] In my opinion.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I see, Julie. Well that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I...I respect that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' She might get jealous, I mean, that's what happened to my...my girlfriend.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, that's fine Julie, I respect your, I respect that. Just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey, can I ask you a question? If uh, he's done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, uh, one more thing, um, you know I've been thinking, uh, I don't really think you need, you know, posters and stuff like,<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' to prove you're straight, I mean, if you're straight, that's all there is to it i-if, am I right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think you're right.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I...I mean, you shouldn't have to prove that you're straight.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> You're right.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I m-mean [line breaks temporarily] Y-you shouldn't have to reassure yours-self. You should just be knowing it, and nothing anybody says, should get very, uh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, it's ve-ah-very-but you see, I have like, I have that [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] in my room, it's just, so that like, you know, for in case I have any-for in case I have any random thoughts, on account really, to tempt me.<br /><br />
''[unintelligible mix of chatter from most participants trying to get their word in]''<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I mean, even if they're random thoughts, even if they're random thoughts, if you know you're ''positive'' about it, you shouldn't have to look at anything to make sure.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, usually.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay. Uh, moving on from all this homosexuality, uh, I have one question, uh- [gets cut off by Chris in the background] ...never mind, [fat douchebag?]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey, ah, let Julie ask a question, let Julie ask her question.<br /><br />
<br />
===7:08 Julie asks about shotacon===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, I was watching you on the Internet yesterday and, what's a shotacon?[slightly cut off]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...I'm sorry, uh-y, I'm sorry, you got cut off, what was that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> What's a sho-[cuts off again]-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...What's a...''short''?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Shot-[cuts off third time, pretty obvious she's saying ''shota'']-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dude, shota.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, shota.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ssshhhh...shota?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, S-H-O-A-T-A [sic].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, it's a word he found online.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, [baby?], yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never heard of that word.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I dunno, if you want to look it up, you can probably find out on an online dictionary...<br /><br />
''[pause, and a weary sigh from someone other than Chris]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'll-I'll take a look. Hang on.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I know some Japanese and I think I've heard that somewhere, like in a magazine or something.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, it's some of that Japanese shit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Probably is. Three moments, I'll look it up.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Okay!<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's radio is audible]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Whoops, that was the wrong one. The wrong bookmark.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' S-H-O-T-A.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I know, I just get the wrong bookmark for...place I wi-for like...dictionary-type website that I have.<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's keyboard taps are audible]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uhhh...Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, now that Julie's done with her question, I also had one.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' He has to find what that means first.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, ''I'm sorry''.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Shit, ah shit, I've just found it on Wikipedia. It's, uh, it's a ma-it's a Japanese name. It's a name of a person. In Japan.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Really.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a Japanese name. I think it's-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh no no, I think you're looking at the wrong thing, it's S- S-H-O-T-A-C-O-N.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> S-H- I mean- O-T-A-C-O-N? Shotacon?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's the same thing, just put C-O-N at the end.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I've read it in a dictionary before, can't remember what it means...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, oh! Okay, here it is, uh..."shotacon, sometimes shortened to shota, is Japanese slang of the phrase 'Shotaro Complex'"...uh..."that describes the attraction to young boys or an individual with such an attraction".<br /><br />
''[Disgusted reactions heard]''<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh my god, what the fuck?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' There's lots of sick people. Y'all are gonna get ricked?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Someone from 4 cent garbage came in and told us to look that up, I didn't-I didn't even want to.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess he's a homo...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Don't worry I banned him already.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Um, Chris, Vivian wants to know if you can like, turn your radio down a bit, it's distracting.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yes, please turn it down.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I thought that was quiet enough, here.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, no, the lady'll probably pick it up<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Alright cool. Merci.<br /><br />
<br />
===10:21 Another fan asks about art supplies===<br />
<br />
'''Another Fan:''' Okay, um, I have a question, um, I like to draw—interrupted by mumbling—I like to draw comics and such, I mean I want to start up a webcomic. What kind of materials do you use?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, like, you mean for drawing?<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well mostly I just use like, uh, paper without lines, like, computer printer paper you can get in, like, Wal-Mart, for an inexpensive price in multiples.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then I use like an RES—RSVP-brand pen with the black ink.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh okay, is it like, um, a gel pen or a ballpoint pen or-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like a ballpoint, it's like a ballpoint pen.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What do you use to color?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I use Crayola brand markers.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would like to—I would—I would—I would recommend getting the Super Tip 50-pack which you can also find at the Wal-Mart.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay. I-[interrupted by someone else on chat]<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's basically-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' At Wal-Mart I usually get the 24-color RoseArts. Those are—those do pretty good too.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhh, Vivian, just so you—just so you know, I'm using the microphone that came with Hey You, Pikachu for Nintendo Sisty-Four [sic].<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, yeah no, no offense, but uh, personally I prefer like, colored pencils and shit cause-[Chris mumbling is heard]-they're like easier to erase. Photoshop [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If you want to use colored pencils that's fine, I'm not, uh, saying that you have to use Crayola markers-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why don't you use colored pencils? They're really good, you should try one on like, at least one page, just try one. One page with just colored pencils.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But um, actually, you can—you can scan your drawings and then color—color them in like, Photoshop or something. [rest of chat murmurs in agreement] That looks really professional, and really good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I prefer using the markers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's just that I-I mean—I mean I've tried—I mean I've colored with colored pencils before, and I just feel best with using markers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I have a question, um, uh, the Hey You Pikachu microphone, how does that work on the, you're using that on your computer? Did you say?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah it's just, yeah, it's like you plug it into uh, into the basic microphone jack.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh, yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Excuse me, I have a nice little Plantronics headset.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Hey Chris can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah, hang on a second, uh... uh, Omicron, that's uh, you're basically, uh, you're basically plagiarizing here. You're even using, uh, parts of my original drawings to, uh, make up your so called real ones and, you're just—you're just parroting—you're just plagiarizing-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's dirty and illegal.<br /><br />
[Unintelligible mumbling]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, you said so yourself, you're being illegal. And plus, and plus I'm-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, isn't combining Sonic with Pikachu the same thing?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, but, but but also, look at this, also I'm looking at this site here, it said, he's claiming the copyright for himself, but he's, but he's not. I mean that's like, but he's, he—he says<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' You need to ban him immediately.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, ban him immediately.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh wait wait wait wait wait...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah maybe you should check-[interrupted by loud noise, probably Chris]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well he said that, he's saying that all of Sonichu material is copyrighted by him, when it's clearly not.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah but you use Sonic and Pikachu, and you copyrighted it-<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' He just offered to give you credit-[interrupted by noisy chatter]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean, I put, I mean, yeah but, I mean, I'm talking about the—the Omnicron [sic] guy here, that's like, just put this link here.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh he offered to give you credit-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes that's the same thing you did.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well no no, he, no-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We decided-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No he's plagiarizing MY Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We just decided [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris it's, it's a parody, kinda like Sonichu is.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but he—yeah, but he's saying, he said—he—on his front page he says, all Sonichu material-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah but he's, he just offered to change it, so are you okay with that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> By changing it to Sonichu X-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, he said he'll give you credit instead of claiming it for himself.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, uh, yeah I would appreciate that, that would be better, yeah, if... he changed that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Alright cool.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Problem solved.<br /><br />
<br />
===15:02 Chris talks about dildos to prove his strength===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes Julie.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you think you could tell everyone about my idea? And, since you're going to do it do you think you could tell everyone so they could look out for it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, your idea... um, oh oh oh, yeah, just basically a video of me standing up to Clyde and showing him how strong I am, doin' a few kicks for the camera or something-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, you should throw some punches, show him what you're made of, you know?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Kick, punch, it's all in the mind ''etc.''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I basically... I pretty much did that when I...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Let him talk, c'mon!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I pretty much did - already proved my strength when I... ripped that... ''dildo'' in half.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Foreign-Sounding Guy:''' Most dildos come apart for cleaning.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' C'mon.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but that thing was screwed together at the seam.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok listen to me...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris...<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' Eh Chris!<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ...could you do a like further test of your strength for me?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''stress sigh'' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I wanna see how strong you are please.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...That's fine, I can do that.<br /><br />
'''Other Fan:''' I mean that's ok, you showed your strength, but you should show her your moves. Like show her, like, what kind of moves you can do.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, let me tell you a story about how this'll work, ok.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' See, my, uh, one of my cousins, uh, this guy at school, kept, y'know, picking on him, calling him gay and stuff, and trying to fight with him, and my cousin told him to sss- y'know, one day, the guy said "Hey man, I'm gonna beat you up" and my cousin said "Look, if I show you some of my moves, I'll prove to you I can kick your ass in a fight" and so my cousin, y'know, he stepped back and, he took, uh, he took Tae Kwon Do, and he did a couple moves, y'know? He just stood there for like five minutes just doing his moves, and, y'know, some punches and kicks and... The guy just backed right off; he didn't even want to talk to him any more. So I think that should work.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> All right, well I'll try that. I'll try that.<br/><br />
'''Guy:''' All right. Sounds good.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br?><br />
'''Fan:''' You try- you always mention about how you're straight but yet in your video about you crushing a dildo, uh, doesn't that kinda like, y'know, not help your cause?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, it proves I'm straight because...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' But you have a dildo.<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I got it free with an order on adameve.com<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' But you ''kept'' it and shit. That ain't cool.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' What I don't... Why were there batteries in...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh yeah Chris, why ''were'' there batteries in it? Why did you keep it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I mean...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it wasn't an easy thing for me to sell, right off the bat, or even to make a profit, so...<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In fact in a way it's a good thing I kept it, cause it allowed me to be able to break it, like I did.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes but why would you keep it?<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why would you keep it?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I woulda saved it for my sweetheart, if she'd wanted it. To use it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Aaaahhh.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But if I were there wouldn't you prefer the real deal?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Some things that metal just can't replace.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Yeah.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I heard that.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' You didn't use it did you?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No I did not.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Did you just throw all the ones you had away?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I only had that one. And there you go, I ri- there you go, I broke it apart.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you just, like, ''take'' it apart, I mean, it did...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' ...seem to come apart, like, screwed on...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I did not take it apart, that thing was glued at the seam. I had to put a lot of strength into breaking it at the middle there.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, but I think, um, showing your moves would be better.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Right.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Clyde would mess with you if you show him you can kick his ass.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey, Chris's a muthafuckin' ''gangsta''!<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Blap blap.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yes, Chris will fuck Clyde's shit up.<br /><br />
(awkward pause)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait, Chris, didn't you say you used a - didn't you say you used scissors to break the dildo?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I pretty much did have to so I could break that ''glued seam''.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, I thought you broke it with your hands.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well I- yeah well I would have but it was dang glued at the seam, so I clipped straight in with the scissors I had.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a pair of Super Shears from [[Cutco]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(feigning interest)'' Huh.<br /><br />
<br />
===19:50 Chris defends his Rule 34===<br />
<br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, let's talk about something else. Uh, Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whenever the announcement of the adult Sonichu page, when I looked at your gallery, very nice stuff, you know, I see a picture of what looks like you with a Sonichu, uh, medallion. Like, and, who's that one girl, exactly?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Who, [[Megan]]?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I thought it was, like, [[Crystal]], cause of the hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, it was - it was originally drawn to be Megan but I censored her eyes to, uh, port- to protect her identity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Mmmmmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''(laughing)'' That's stupid! (?) That's so silly.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I drew that after I found the ED page in November.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you say that?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In protest against it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thought you were going to get rid of it anyway.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I tore up the original drawing, I, in- into squares, and I put in in an envelope.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you upload it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you do that shit? Like, and...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I understand Rosechu, but, like y'know, why, like, something that's from real life. That's the problem (?)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's not necessarily from real life, it depends on you inter- it depends on your interpretation, I mean it's hardly- I mean, '''most women have long brown hair, and the eyes are censored''', so...<br/><br />
(laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''Most'' women?!?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I remember in that one video you were saying it was Megan.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because it broke, because it end up, because it the end it broke up my friend - broke up my friendship eve, my uh, friendship with Megan.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um, can I ask you a question? In the third picture, with [[Angelica Rosechu]], what is... what's happening, is... God... doing...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nope. She's masturbating. And she's enjoying it.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But she has no hands there. How's she doing it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' She's ''enjoying'' it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But she does... She does...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah but how's she doing it? She doesn't have her hands there.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> She does have her hands, she's... ''(stress sigh)'' She's... like most women would be able to do the same thing.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thing it's the angle, Julie. I think it's the angle you were looking at it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah plus uh, the picture wasn't, uh, very - wasn't as clear as, like, you know, I would have liked to have had it, uh, I mean, I had that file for a while, and it...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah some of those are kinda blurry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, some deg- some degraded.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ? a good question, have you drawn anything... of... have you drawn anything like that with me? Cause I would actually like to see, if you did. If so, could you, and let me see? I, uh, sorry, that's very rude to ask.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm sorry, let me answer this guy. Yeah, well, I made a retraction video later saying that I- I disowned that address.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ah, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just after that guy hacked into it and changed to it to suck. And as such.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hang on, I'm gonna take a look at that... My Youtube...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I like this song.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What song?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' The song that's playing in the background of, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what do you think of, uh, what do you think of that guy who advertises products, Billy Mays? What do you think of him?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... Billy... Oh! Yeah he's an ok guy, I watched him on Home Improvement.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Billy Mays?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, that was another guy on Home Improvement, Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No that was the same guy. That was the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Really?!? Let's look up. IMDB, go. ''(sound of typing)''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Believe me, it's the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, I really enjoyed your, um, adult, uh, section of the site.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... okey dokey, very good. Aaahh, trying to figure out how to update the link on this thing here. Oh, maybe under here. Oh there it is, thank God (?), update right now.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(singing)'' You spin me right round baby, right round...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (joining in) Like a record baby, right round round round<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's a classic, I can't help in man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There you are, updated. It's finally fixed.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Actually that was Richard Karn on Home Improvement, not Billy Mays.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well my mistake, I mean the guy had the beard and uhh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh yeah I can understand.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And the voice sounds- and the voice sounds the same...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah. They sound the same.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There's a matter of interpretation apparently I misinterpreted so I will admit that I was wrong.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah see we all make mistakes, don't be too hard on yourself.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unintelligible babble or singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you gotten any fan art submissions or notable? For the uh- webpage?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I got one today... It's like mostly a drawing of that uh that uh- of the fan herself.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -got in the snail mail today.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -Sunday.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hmmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What are you doing for this Valentine's day Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhm... I'm sorry, what was that question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What will you be doing this year on Valentine's day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm depends...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ahhh, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm.<br /><br />
Fan: Surely a man of such magnitude as yourself are going to be doing something important, aren't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Magnitude? Way to choose the words buddy.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Vocabulary talent.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, cause I don't have Julie over here yet.<br /><br />
(Reactions of OHs and AHs)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If she was here...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible) -play games.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Or we could just uh... talk.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Ehehehehe. Maybe... uh... why no redheads?<br /><br />
'''Other Woman:''' Yeah?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I was trying to think about that when the other guy asked that question. Uh... I was trying to think up that unh... mmmm... Uhhhh, redheads just don't be very- tract me so much.<br /><br />
Several: Uh, ah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's- it's- a- pi- a possibility that they're dyed.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmmmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But yeah y'know natural redheads enh, yeah, just don't really turn me on as much.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I see...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you thought about girls with um, highlights?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... (pause) aaahhhh... what turns me on hhh- (inhales) (pause) obviously the women.<br /><br />
'''Man:''' Gotta have the women. (?)<br /><br />
'''Guy''': What about piercings or tattoo?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, neither of those.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhhh-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris! How bout like non-orange hair, not like... no, never mind. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... oh... okay... hmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait Chris! How do you feel about blue hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Blue hair's okay, otherwise I wouldna- Otherwise I wouldn't've liked Sailor Mercury.<br /><br />
'''British? guy:''' That is true, she does have blue hair.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' She's a very fine character. There is no way to deny it.<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Blue hair is OFF DA HOOK!!!<br/><br />
<br />
===28:35 Chris impersonates various cartoon characters===<br />
<br />
'''British??? guy:''' Doesn't Marge Simpson have blue hair as well?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (in some kind of insane voice) Oh yeah! Marge Simpson has blue hair and it's as tall as the Empire State building!!!<br /><br />
(Some HMMs UHs and UMs follow)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yo Chris!! Can you do some impersonations for us?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Oh we'd love to hear that!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just did Marge Simpson.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah you're really talented.<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(Several people talking at once)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> -they're really good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Do another SimpsonsChris, how about Comic Book Guy?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Mmmmhmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I'm very indeed. Oh aren't we all promiscuous and whatnot. I like Batman and Robin, oh look! Stan Marsh has come into the thing again - I forget that guy's name, that guy who did the Marvel comics.<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Stan Lee. (Pause) Chris do your Donald Duck impression.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Everybody have fun (incoherent and scary quacking)<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris you should work for Disney.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's good Chris.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Have you ever considered being a voice actor?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Errrrrp... possibly, I'm not sure.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (incoherent, cut off by Chris)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent... another cartoon voice)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris, you're a Christian, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I was just wondering-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahm actu-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -do you just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm actually a Methodist church.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome, I was just wondering: Do you think AIDS was sent by god to kill the homos or do you think that it's just an accident or something man-made?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thou- the thought never occurred to me... thought never occurred to me.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' can you do an impression of Arnold Schwarzenegger?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hold- the question...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Let Chris answer the question.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thought- the thought never occurred to me about what you just said about the AIDS there mmmm... but y'know, it's a possibility and I will not agree nor disagree with it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I was just wondering I mean, I've had that discussion with some of my Christian friends. I just wanted to get your opinion, thank you.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmhhh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think (clears throat) I think Omicron has a point and you did tell me you went to a methodist church didn't you? So that's-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well th- well my Methodist church is uh more loose on- is not as strict on uh- on uh sex.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris I don't know- I don't know that much about religion in the States but I don't think there is a looser Meth- Methodist church. God makes the rules Omicron says.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, hmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well, you know personally I think that the government made AIDS to kill off all the brothers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whoa, whoa... That's what the blacks always say.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. (pause) I'm going to agree, that sounds like something that uh... well, a black guy would say.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So your church is kinda of uh- they let you do- their kinda loose on the whole moral restrictions?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... (pause) uhhh... that's... what's the question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Your church they- you said they're kind of more uh- y'know they're less strict on the whole moral thing, like, as far as sexuality goes? Right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -ah basically.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But y'know, uhh, I thought you're supposed to listen to the Bible or whatever not, y'know, not necessarily- no, never mind.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (interrupts)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, there's also a uh, there's also a- think about this uh, if you uh- if you- if you were a think uh- you have to find for yourself a good meaning behind uh- good meaning behind watching pornography to uh- like teach how it- how to do this and that when you actually get around to doing it...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's all ???<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's all's considered education for yourself.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' How is that realistic at all?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, it's uh- not a really good thing to learn from, trust me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It can be done before marriage as well as long as me and my sweetheart really love each other very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But not in Christianity.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But all I'm saying is y'know, porn is completely, completely unre- unrealistic I mean you can't really learn anything from it.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It gives- it gives you enough ideas.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unclear)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (incoherent) porn.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' When you actually have sex, it's nothing like porn.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe not like you, you not gonna do it-<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' You can't do it immediately- immediately anal sex cause most women are not very happy with anal sex and also...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay, shut up<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' -and also weird-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Shut up.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Yes.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And... that wasn't cool, like...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That was uncalled for...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, like, suthin' a BLACK MAN would say...<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' That's racist man...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, somebody said it on here first before I did.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Does that make it ok?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, I think he's trying to make it clear that- I dunno.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I typically agree with that guy.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So nothing g- it doesn't make it ok.<br /><br />
(incoherent)<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling) I wi- I'm sorry, I take it back.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(unclear)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Guys can we get back to Sonichu, Please?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah this is getting ridiculous.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unclear) -Sonichu actually.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Anyway, my question is that: why does Sonichu not wear clothes while Rosechu and the other Rosechus do wear clothes? And underwear?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Aaaaaaaaaamp... It's like uh- it's basically a cartoon and it doesn't really matter, it's like... mm... think about this: Most cartoon characters wear at least one article of clothing. At least one article. And uh- it's like Yogi Bear who just wears a necktie and a hat.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 35.14)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Other Guy:''' I think it would be cool if all the Sonichus and Rosechus got together and they and- they all formed a big team and they had special uniforms or something, kinda like the X-men.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Or Power Rangers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh yeah, I don't do- I don't do well- I'm not in- no uniforms. It's a uniform and other Sonichus and Rosechus.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'm just wondering if you'd do another impression: What does Blachu sound like? Uh, Black Sonichu? Or Blake?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eeeeuuunh... Eh... ahhhh...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Can you imitate it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... I'm not sure... uhhhhm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Like does he sound black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Possibly, but I'm not certain. I'm not leaning towards it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I'd like to hear it, but if you don't want...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just never- I just never really thought about that. I'd say that he possibly sounds similar to uh, y'know Shadow the hedgehog. But he could possibly sound, black. He could. Don't quote me on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' All right, I was just wondering if you'd do his voice but...<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Hey why does the BAD guy gotta be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never said the bad guy "has to" be black. (pause) I mean, look at the- the range of villanies, I mean there's black and whites and uh... male females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I noticed that uh- Silvana's also... black lookin'.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just decided to color her black because she was born- she came from outer space from a black egg, which was the- which came out of the rainbow.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah, I was also wonderin' about that like-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I- I- I-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' If Silvana came out of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes it's-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Why would she be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' I mean like black ain't part of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like the black sheep of the family. Y'know you put all the colors together and it does become black.<br /><br />
(unintelligible reactions)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -like a brownish-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) is a (unintelligible) color.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Maybe it's because she's from space and there's not a lot of light in space and it's dark or something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah that- a uh yeah- that's one of the-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hmmm.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhm, did you look at the link of my friend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, ummmm...<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Yeah, since you love blue hair.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh- no I haven't looked at it and I don't wanna make Julie feel jealous if I did- if I went and did.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Julie would mind.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhhh...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You look at pornography don't you?<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' (mumble)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, that- that was two syllables "Rose-chu". You don't- don't add- don't say the "e" it's just "Rosechu".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah you went over this last chat.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>(I don't know, it sounds like "narrator")<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sounds like he says "narrator" again)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh... I was just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, well, obviously the uh- the narrator who did those audio books was incorrect. Specially since I never gave that person the approval to do the audiobooks.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think it's just a fan project and I think he-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' and I think he might have one of the West coast dialects. I know that the South they say y'all but over here-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well obviously he lied-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -different. I'd be proud if they made one of my projects into an audiobook though. That means that there are a lot of fans out there that really like it.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Ay.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' They're not selling to try and make any money off it. They're not trying to rip you off. They always made sure- they always narrate the first page by saying "Christian Weston Chandler" so they're not trying to cheat you or anything.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' The people know you're making it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I- I hear that. I just, apparently they misin- misinterpreted the (audio breaks up) name Rosechu. Or mispronounced it. Misinterpreted, mispronounce- fairly the same thing in that situation... possibly. To answer that question... possibly.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uh, Vivian said that the audiobooks made Sonichu way popular that- than you could ever ever do on your own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I will not disagree with the statement. And I appreciate her help.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris. Would you be offended if a fan wrote a fanfiction about Sonichu?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Faaanfiction... if it's- if it's not demeaning or makes them look stupid. Then it's fine- it's fine. (pause) Like I did mind when, shoot, what's his name? That guy... uhhhh... that guy that the uhhhh... did the animations, on his computer.<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' You did mind or you didn't?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Animations???<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think I know what he's talking about. Are you talking about the um...<br /><br />
<br />
(background noise begins)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' Well the original play was a Greek play. Where they're all y'know... Greeks... and crazy stuff happens and they're all runnin' around in togas. So if you ever wanna see the movie "A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum" it was a classic and it had some real classic people from the 50s and 60s in it. Kinda like "It's a MAD MAD MAD MAD World". Sort of a classic old school movie from funny old school world. First color movie type thing. But that'll be a high school play. You'll wanna see that. You might actually enjoy it. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
(inaudible response)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' You never know that might be fun to do. Well I guess that wouldn't work on the weekend then... you gotta...<br /><br />
<br />
'''(FOR THOSE OF YOU WONDERING WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON, IT APPEARS THAT THERE WAS SOME TECHNICAL PROBLEM THAT CAUSED ANOTHER MUMBLE CHANNEL TO BE RECORDED WHILE THE CONVERSATION WITH CHRIS BECAME BARELY AUDIBLE BACKGROUND NOISE. INSTEAD ALL THAT CAN BE HEARD IS SOME BUTTFACE YAMMERING ABOUT FILMS AND TELEVISION SHOWS. I'M NOT GOING TO KEEP TRANSCRIBING IT. CHRIS IS STILL TALKING AND ANSWERING QUESTIONS, BUT NOTHING CAN BE UNDERSTOOD OVER THESE GUYS.)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''(AT 42.56 THE AUDIO SUDDENLY RESUMES NORMALLY)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Unknown person:''' Uh you-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I uh- noticed he's another BLACK villain.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah in real life he was black. Without meaning any offense to the uh- black guy in general, cause you've noticed, among the Jerkops there's uh- we got black's and white's, males and females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(several people jump in at once)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) -you've never drawn a female officer before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well y'know uhhh... uhhh, comic book number 7, near the end. Near the end of the time travel episode. Uhh, I have no opinion about what Obama's doing cause I don't watch the news.<br /><br />
Accented woman: But you voted for him, didn't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes I voted for him because I saw myself in him when I com- when I saw both the documentaries and downloaded them for the Playstation Network between Obama and McCain. I mean voted for a person I saw more of myself of-<br /><br />
Accented woman: You usually vote for someone based on their political leanings, not how you view them. As I were Republican, I voted for John McCain. Not because I liked him but because I- he had the same political views as me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basi- basically I'm a moderate.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh, I see. Um, I was wondering. I was reading opinions: do you agree with his financial bailouts?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm, I don't even know what it is. So I can't disagree or agree.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Well, to make it short um, it's about uh- the government- President Obama is planning to uh- a new one- (cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You got cut off there.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uhh, ok, we lost him.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yo, Chris, uh, do you, you didn't just vote for Obama cause he was black, did you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I did not vote for him because he was black. I voted for him cause I saw myse- because I saw myself in him. In like, similar lifestyles. And I saw that he was a good man, I mean after all, com- I saw- I saw I watched both of the A&E documentaries, before I can- before I knew who I would vote for.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 45.29)'''<br /><br />
<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris:, Chris what did you see in him that you say in your self?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Like for one thing we were like outcasts, at least one point in our lives.<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Wait, wait hold up earlier you said that you thought he would probably paint the white house black.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh oh that was my father’s joke he said that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Is your father a racist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but you see I drew that for him before I saw the documentaries so respectfully withdrew that comic page.<br /><br />
'''???:''' does your father hate black people.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Not necessarily but it’s just how my father just how my father that does not reflect in any way that’s how he felt (annoying ass noise in the background)<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Man that racist.<br /><br />
'''??? :''' Hey Chris I so the ahh saw the Sonichu and Rosechu love sack that you put up and I thought if was pretty cool for (you adult friends?) I just had a question though: do you have any plans in the comic to have romance between you and one of the hedgehogs I mean-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Yelling) No no no<br /><br />
'''???:''' -we would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' I mean is was just wondering because there are fans how would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Now- now that you answered the his question my kind of relates to his what are your thoughts on inter racial breeding and marriages?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would not agree of disagree with them but in my personal preference I would fell- I would feel more comfortable in having a full relationship with a white woman but I am willing- am still willing to be friends and acquaintances and give and have respect for the black women as well.<br /><br />
'''???:''' What about Asians like Japanese?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I’m ok with them as well (yelling) a once.<br /><br />
'''???:''' So would you get married with a Japanese woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hhhmmmm I would have, yes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> but I’m giving Julie to opportunity here.<br /><br />
'''Clyde:''' Julie’s a lucky woman.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris, I was just wondering, is Silvana gonna become one of the good guys, like- like Black Sonichu did before?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There’s a possibility but I have not given that a co- I have not confirmed that yet.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Uh, is she gonna lose the male sexual parts and become a full-fledged woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhhmmm possibly but I haven’t given that- I haven't given that thought either.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Also um I was reading (?Phillip’s?) question, Chris what did you want to be when you were little?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don’t remember, I do not remember. I’m just making it as I go basically.<br /><br />
'''???:''' is there ever gonna be like uh, an end to your sonichu series like a finale?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hmmmm I don’t know, probably would not.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Oh so it keeps going and going?<br /><br />
???: You ever consider making comic about the history of CWCville?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhmmmm an episode dedicated towards that possibility.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris are you going to keep the name changes that you made or are you going back to the original names?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahhh ya I’m keeping the name changes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' But you know umm Nintendo was umm, y'know, they sent you a letter you never really talk about it further.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but at least- at least- the hel- they use to benefit me for the fact that uh allowed me to fix noting in that sense so I couldn’t be sued by such people in that sense.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 50 min)'''<br /><br />
<br />
(scattered reactions)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So the name changes were good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So uh, Chris I was wondering if uh Mary- Mary Lee Walsh Or I guess the new name: Ryam Sla- I don't know-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Sla-weel.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Slaweel, thank you. Uhm, if she were to use her magic to curse Rosechu with a penis, would Soni- what- wou- would that test the relationship between Sonichu and her? While they were fighting the battle to have it removed, I'm just curious.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... Firstly uh, she does not- she does not have the power ch- to do that.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I just thought you know, remember you did the story about 4-cent-garbage and drawing all the- the picture and-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah you what, that's one- that's one thing: drawing them, but not actually putting them on the character.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Cause I think that would be like an epic story though, like to actually have a quest-<br /><br />
Fan: I'll second that.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -to go to have that penis removed from Rosechu. I mean it's a test of romance between her and Sonichu.<br /><br />
(muttering)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And when that prevails and the penis is removed and everybody- everybody lives happily ever after. Y'know that would be awesome.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnnnnnh, I dunno I have to- I dunno I have to think about that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It is a really good idea. I like it.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I do too.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah, that's good.<br /><br />
Other fan: It could show just how much Rosechu means to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I'll- I'll consider it but I'm not making any promises.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' We understand.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(several talking at once)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -decided on that subject?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm working on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' If you actually decide to go forward with that story? Do you think maybe- maybe you could give her a talking penis?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!!!<br /><br />
(laughter from various people)<br /><br />
(unintelligible responses)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ok, I think- I think we've talked enough about that one guys.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I have a question that doesn't involve penises.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Anyway, my question is since we've been hearing lot of vicious lies and slander about this, could you confirm exactly why you've been fired from your job at Wendy's Chris? Cause we've been hearing all sorts of- of crazy things and we wanna know the truth.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmmmmmm... well, firstly, what have you heard?<br /><br />
'''Other guy:'''Well we heard that uh you... we've heard so many things like you helped a small child and you did a Donald Duck impersonation and you scared the child.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... also that- also that is correct but I did not scare the child. The child was tired, I was only trying ta- I was only trying to make the child feel better. That's a little amusement. But I did not make the child cry, the child was already- was just tired.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' So you didn't help them cut their food and... yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I did help them- help them get their food to- by giving them uhh, by giving them bags and a top for their baked potato boat.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris, when will um, the pictures of Zapina, appear on the um, 18 plus page?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that was a deleted scene! That was a deleted scene.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Why was it deleted?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basically, hhh... y'c- y'cant' really have it if you don't have Rosechu working to take the- working to take the pictures of herself up in the bathroom. Cause like can't have one without the other.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaahhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I don't know if this is a good question but there's something I wonder about that- we kind of have this DVD you made and... y'know, we never unfortunately got... but I'm curious um... do you ever plan to release it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I'd pay money for that, I think everyone else here would probably pay money for it too.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Indeed.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (breaking up) I wanna ask a question.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I hear it's also on YouTube.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris do you know that you've influenced the rap/hip hop community?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmh... uh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I just wanted to mention that because I saw some YouTube videos and it- and- and from some underground hip hop artists such as Immortal Technique and they've sampled some of your voice audio complaining about your struggles with uhm... with the school board, with the security guards and they were- they felt so empowered that they actually took those words and mad'em into a very powerful rap song. How does that- how is your reaction to that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhhhh... basically I have not watched those videos so... I don't have an opinion.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I will provide you a link to that, hold on a moment.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh that's ok, actually I uh, did sample one. The one where they basically played the parody from "Can't touch this".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, no, trust me it's waaay more serious than that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I still haven't heard of- heard of what you're talking about.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Nevermind.<br /><br />
(rustling and moving noises)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do an impression of MC Hammer?<br /><br />
(more clicking and rustling)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Can't touch this do do do doo do dooo Can't touch this! Do do do dooo do do do... can't touch this.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' That was- heheheh.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Awesome.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you- can you do Dr. Nick Riviera from the Simpsons?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> HIIII EVERYBODY!<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hello Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hi Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hi Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that should say Dr. Nick cause that's who I'm imitatin'.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''???:''' That uh-<br /><br />
'''???:''' HELLOOO EV'RYBODY!!!!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well that-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hi Dr. Nick!<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Thank you, I love the Simpsons.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do... Peter from Family Guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhenhenhenh... Hey Lois! Look at me! I'm just (unclear) you nose, and I'm eatin' your nose.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh that's dead on.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Oh would you- Omicron's been interested in tis- would you actually make a documentary like- like your other DVD but make your daily life?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... I'm... yeah I might but uh... I'm not su- I'm not sure bout it at the moment.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaaaaaaanh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris can you do Mario? You know from Super Mario?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hay paisano! How you doin' mistah hedgehog!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's very good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then Sonic- then Sonic would say "what?!?"<br /><br />
(giggling)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris do you have any plans to make a video of yourself taking a dump on a Hexbox?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No! That's gross.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Yeah that was pretty sick right there.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Let's ban him.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's bad enough I cut in half with an axe.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> and one of the elevator jokes...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Oh we remember that, that was a classic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And I earned a trophy for that.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmm...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Yeah, I remember that, it was destroying a Hexbox by cutting it in half if I remember...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' If I were to draw nude Zapina fanart, uhm, would you put them on the site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... uhh, your- you uh- free to draw them at your- at your own- own preference, but I will not be- I will not put it on the website because- cause- because I will not want to break any laws of having underage portrayals- portrayals of underage nudity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Isn't Dot a child?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry... what?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dot, from Animaniacs.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' So-uh- uhm- I think I looked up somewhere that um, drawings do not count, they're just lines on paper not like real pictures that are horrible.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah I believe-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Draw-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (cut off)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Those illustrations do not count as child pornography. Because with drawing it's art- it's artistic merit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Welll... I dunno, I guess it depends I have to- but- y'know you could do the drawing and I'll think- I'll consider it.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, would it be possible to get any pictures of Sonichu having anal sex with Rosechu?<br /><br />
(pause... thumps and feedback)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm considering that but...<br /><br />
'''Accented woman''' Who keeps letting this person in? You are very offensive.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -and and, if you draw those, do you think that Rosechu would actually clean Sonichu's penis off with her mouth (laugh) w-when they're done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nah, no, I don't think so, I think- I think- I think it would be unh- yeah w-wash it off with a washcloth.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Do you think then, at that point then they would sell the washcloth on eBay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!<br /><br />
(people talking over each other)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, no, no more potty humor, all right?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah alright, okay<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Unrelated to party humor, I want to ask that in your Springbreak uhh Issue of Sonichu you had an introduction of a, of new character, the [[Yawning Squirtle|squirtle]] and I wanna ask<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:''' (interrupting)</span> No, that's, no, no, no, that's not just a character, I was, I was not introducing a new character, I was just doing like a poster thing for a bubble speak under one, I thought I just draw some water type pokemon un-in there<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I understand but the thing is there is huge cult following for that character and I strongly suggest that you should capalize on that and, and make him to a main character<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eh... No, I don't think so<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's just sleeping Squirtle work- waking up!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, people just thought he was really cute and yawning Squirtle, I don't know, I heard someone say, man wouldn't it be great if he would be that [[Autistic|dopey]] sidekick that he'd come and they'd be like, like, he'd come in and say something silly after someone did something and they would be like "Squirtle"!<br /><br />
People laughing and talking over each other<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um...<br /><br />
???: Yo, it makes you *unintelligible* (Chris and someone talk over another)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yes Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I'm asking you about... Hm... Never mind, I lost my train of thought. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's okay. These guys made me lose a train of thought as well. Doesn't multiple inputs.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yes, kinda lotta control here. I might- I may have to... never mind<br /><br />
Silence<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I never lose my train of thought because I have a GPS tracking system on it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, that was a good joke. (chuckle)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, could you tell us a joke right now. Just any joke.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay, here is a fuck- here is a funny- here is a funny mind scream. Funny rhyme scheme... not to be taken literally:<br /><br />
On your Game Boy Advance SP<br /><br />
create 'yer MII<br /><br />
den play it on WII<br /><br />
with your PSP<br /><br />
hooked to your PS3<br /><br />
cause it's fun<br /><br />
see?<br /><br />
And never ff, and never play a [[Hex Box]] 360<br /><br />
Because it's stupid and you're not a dummy (in childlike voice)<br /><br />
Mock laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That is really good.<br />
'''Fan''': Chris is that something you made up?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I made that up.<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Chris, Chris, can I write that down and tribute to quote you that? Oh man, that's good<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) So you mean to type it up and you quote me on the rhyme scheme?<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Yeah, I'd like that. I've been thinking about making a quote book like a mini Chris quote book like something you could open and have a cool line to say when you're on a party and you're like right things.<br /><br />
People talking over Chris and Alucard<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, well I'm typing it up for Alucard, so...<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Thank you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, can we hear one more?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay well here, okay um, okay here is an [[Christian's sex joke|adult joke]] I once come up with a long time ago.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': This is going to be good!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright- Alright there's this married couple, Bob and Jane, and they've been- they were looking forward to having children. So, one night, Bob comes home from work, and uh Jane says, "Hi, you had a good day, dear?" And he sa- and she sa-- he says, "Nah, it's been a long day, darling" And she said, "Well, it's okay, why don't we go upstairs, and we'll have some Breakfast." And he says, "Breakfast, at Nine p.m.?" And she says, "Sure, you bring the MILK, and I'll get an EGG."<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yo, I heard that before, man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then later, they had a boy and a girl, Junior Bacon and Orange Juice. All Part of a Balanced Breakfast.<br /><br />
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif]]<br /><br />
Perplexed silence<br />
<br />
'''Fan''': Hey, Chris, how do you solve a Mexican tank?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Stand in front of it?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': No, man, shoot the guys pushing at it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fans''': Oh that's a good one.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' I got one.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get a bunch of [[Niggos|blacks]] in a car?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Throw some chicken in.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get them out of the car?<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Job application.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What do you call a beach of black people buried up to their necks?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Afro-turf.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I came up with one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what's the difference between a black man and a pizza?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': A pizza can feed a family of four.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': How do you stop black people from jumping on a bed?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, enough racist jokes.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Put velcro on the ceiling.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enough, enough black jokes.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, uh Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Sorry<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I showed by friend that over 18 site, and he said, that he um, he um, you know he, he masturbated to it. Does that make you feel (interrupted)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's good, that's basically the reaction I would be going for. Among the male ca... among the male population, being attracted to the women.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But those are your drawings, it's like, I think he's gay now. I mean, you're a guy and you drew those.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm drawing, I'm drawing female characters.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yah, but it's drawn by you and you're, like, I don't know. It's kind of awkward for me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris, I actually need to thank you, the pictures on that site, it looked like the camera was inside Sonichu's penis when Rosechu was giving him a blowjob. That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. I've always wanted to have a camera in my penis so that I could see that if I ever got a blowjob, that would be awesome, I just wanted to say thank you very much for that perspective. It's the first time I've ever seen it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': There's a question here on the site, oh sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, well I see it... no I don't basically masturbate to my own drawings.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But you're okay if other people do, right? Even guys?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You're okay if other people, you know, masturbate to your drawings? Even if they're guys, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If the guys are masturbating to the female drawings, then yes, that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I just thought it was kind of awkward, but maybe I'm seeing it a different way.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I doubt that, uh, having a whole bunch of drawings of naked female characters can be misinterpreted as something else.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Can I to ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': One time, a friend and I were looking at porn together, and we masturbated together, but the porn was straight, ordinary porn. Is this gay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I'm sorry, where you looking at naked women?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Yes, but we were in the same room, masturbating.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, if you both were thinking about the naked women you were looking at, then I would definitely say you both are straight, cuss you're not thinking about each other, you're thinking about the women.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Right. <br /><br />
'''Fan''': Would you do that with someone?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': I'm relieved.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Man, nigger you gay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Shut up. Would you do that with someone? Like a guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Nah, I'm straight dog.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I'd, yeah I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Omnicron has a question on here, on the side here.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You see it, or?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. That's not straight.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what about the earlier question.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, the one before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, which one before? Oh, you mean...<br /><br />
(All talk at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, what do you think about-<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wait, wait let him answer.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Let him answer that one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was gonna rephrase it but okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'd say it would depend on your interpretation, what is adultery to you?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But, you know, isn't the Bible only supposed to be interpreted, it's the word of God, you're not really supposed to interpret it any other way.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': It is what it is.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's in English.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh, I have no comment.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, that's what my, uh, you know I was talking about my mom saw those drawings. I mean, not the drawings, the posters, the playboy posters and that's basically what she got bad about. She said I was committing adultery.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah okay, if you don't want to talk about it, fine.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, hmmm, I think you shou, I think you should, uh, when you, I think I can see where this could be interpreted one way or another, it depends on how you look at the woman. I mean, alright, you're looking at the, uh woman, you might imagine her naked, but, I mean, you would respe- I mean, you would, you would still respect, I mean, if you were still respecting that woman, you would appreciate her more for like who she was aside or in addition to the nudity, then that's not as bad as just, as just only doing it for the appearance.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's why, uh, that's why the playboy magazines, they give you the introductions of the women. It's like letting you know who they are (unintelligible).<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh but, yeah, but there weren't any, uh, descriptions under the, yeah never mind.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Thank you for the clarification Chris.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris, do you love America?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm patriotic.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's good. I was wondering if you could sing the national anthem for us?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [[Wikipedia:My Country, 'Tis of Thee| My country tis' of thee. Sweet land of liberty. Of thee, of thee I sing.]] I don't remember the rest.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Lands where my fathers died.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Land of the pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
(Fans all start singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Stop it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey I'll, I'll tell y'all a funny joke that's kind of patriotic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, you got this, you got this funny Mexican- you got this funny Mexican guy, and he just, he just come back home to Meh-he-co after an American visit. He's like (high pitched voice) Oh the people there are so very friendly. I mean, I go to the basketball game. I sit in the back row. I sit in the back row. And then, and then, and then all of a su- and then all of the sudden right before the game started, everyone turned around, put their hands on their chests, and they say, "Oh say can you seeeeee"!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I thought you said no racist jokes?<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': Yeah man, that ain't cool!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was a name, it was a name joke.<br /><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''':...Spanish language<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm kind of offended by that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': That's racist dog. That ain't cool.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': You laugh you support terrorism.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ¿Qué?<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What'd you say?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What the hell? Who said that?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Forget it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I said, you laugh, you support terrorism.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, he's gone.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Awful Mr. T impression) I pity the fool, who try and misinterpret things, and twist them around, and then jam new words into my mouth.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You do a good Mr. T<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah you do.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) no jibber jabber.<br /><br />
(Fans laugh)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, did you watch the A-team back in the day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No but, no but, basica- but I have seen Mr. T. And then I also, I also saw when he guest, when he quest starred in an episode of Alvin and the Chipmunks.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I saw that episode, he helped uh Theodore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Theodore was getting picked on, yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, you posted a link here.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well at my [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|Methodist church]], uh, sex before marriage is okay as long as, uh, she and I, we love each other very much and truly.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But that's what they tell you, I'm talking about the word of God.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *Sigh* Okay, I'm getting tired, okay, I'm getting tired here, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, but...<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, sorry, no more of that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, you're right. Please stay Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay. Alright, I'll stay a little while longer.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, if anyone does, if anyone asks anything that makes him feel uncomfortable, I'm gonna kick you out of the room.<br /><br />
(Everyone speaks)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Chris, could you give me some advice?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I have a Japanese friend, he's, he's actually 26 and he's never had a girlfriend and we asked him some questions, just joking around one day. And we asked him if his, when he gets married, if his wife wanted to sleep with another man, would he be okay with it, and he actually said yes, as long as she wasn't being forced. Now that kind of bothered us, because us Americans, right, we think that marriage, and you know you're with somebody, they should be faithful, but he doesn't seem to think so, so I wanted to see if you had any advice maybe on what we could do to try and convince him that his viewpoint is wrong.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, hmm, it's not necessarily that the viewpoint is wrong. See, the thing is, what, to, to quote, to make it accepta- to make it like as if you're actually cheating on somebody, cheating on your spouse in the marriage, it's like not telling them, not telling him, not telling him or her about it beforehand, but it's like, you know, you, it's like you tell them beforehand and you get their approval, it's, it's okay, even if they don't want to be part of it. But not telling them, that's definitely like uh, cheating on them.<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that's another thing I would have to think about, cause, got a bit of a, couple of items of destruction that need to be repaired<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I just got, I just talked to that one friend I was talking about who, uh, saw your website, the 18 one, and it turns out he's, he's gay, he's actually gay and he fapped to, uh I mean he masturbated to, uh, Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hahaha, your friend's a fag.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': And I think he's...<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out for 15 seconds)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ...about that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I think in case you would definitely want to let him know that you are straight and you don't want that kind of relationship, and maybe, and you know<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I tell him just to get the hell away from your site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm not saying that, but like, uh, you know, you don't want that kind, you don't, I mean that's, that's basically confirmed on that note. So, uh, you want, you still wanna be friends but you don't, but you're not into that kind of thing.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I mean, he was looking at your site, like, the 18 site and he was in like, um-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Over 18.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': The over 18 site you made. The loveshack. I thought he was just like, you know, masturbating to Rosechu, but it turns out he was attracted to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *sigh* Uhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, I don't think I'll be friends with this guy anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, yeah, then tell him, yeah, to get the hell out of your house and stay away if you don't want to be friends anymore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Seems like you know too many gay friends mister.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh shut up.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris, you know how-<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's not my fault. <br /><br />
'''Another fan''': You know how cologne or perfume, you know, women wear that to try and attract men? Do you think that farts attract gay guys to each other?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Now that's stupid! Not only is that stupid, but it's gross.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Here, I'm gonna take that question and I'm gonna, I'm gonna take that question and spin that into something that's less weird. What would you say the best cologne or whatever a guy could wear to get a girl's attention?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I recommend [[Axe|Axe]] body spray.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh yeah? I think I tried that one time.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': That actually does it for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What scent do you use?<br /><br />
(All speak)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Don't you use ass body spray?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Mmm, love it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Does the Axe effect, does it really exist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Does Axe exist?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, the Axe effect. You know, they say in the commercials spray it and girls will come to you.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) and it works for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Has it worked for you Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, well, yeah, I, yeah I haven't got that working for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I think it's a scam personally.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I mean... I mean, Old Spice is pretty good. I had, I had like a couple of girls go up to me asking me for dates with Old Spice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I actually wore that Orion sent, uhh, still smelling it. So it will work Chris, you just gotta give it time.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Using the Axe.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Cameron but, isn't Axe spray for men?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': No no no no no no no, see, see I said a boyfriend, a boyfriend that I met.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, okay.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah. *laughs*<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That makes sense.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, silly, silly. I have a question for you Chris, what celebrities have you met?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Well what I'm saying is the Axe effect doesn't work. Okay, sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't actually met other celebrities in person, my real life, unless you count a local radio DJ.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I've met the DJ of my radio station 95.1 and [[Excel Saga|Monica Rial]], and meeting Monica Rial was just a treat.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ahhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was, it was good.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, she's pretty.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Maybe you should go to her and, um, maybe she could be like a contact for voice acting. I mean, you do pretty good imitations.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Do Homer Simpson!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Homer Simpson impression) Oh, look at me! I'm a stupid old person, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp, D'OH!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That was awesome<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Who else can you do Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What other imitations can you do?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, a lot. It depends on if you name it, I might recall, if you name the person or character I'll, if I can recall my memory than I will imitate that person.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Can you try Bender from Futurama?<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I reckon I can do a pretty good Bender! I can twist off my arm and, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp!<br />
'''Fan''': Chris, um, since my girlfr-(clears throat)-sorry. Since my girlfriend broke up with me, I was just wondering if you could give me any tips to like, pick up y'know, another girlfriend?<br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) Valentine's Day is coming.<br />
'''Fan''': Yeah. It's gonna be lonely without her, y'know.<br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah I know.<br />
'''Fan''': Can you help?<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) No I do not know what tha- neither of them sound like in voices so I can't imitate them. (sigh) As for- as for dating advice uh, if you're- when you're going out to meet a woman, and this is like advice that's like it could've been taken from my, taken from my own advice I gave in the, the one in the video I did when I just turned 25. But it was definitely, it was given, but it was offered in this book written by a nine-year-old.<br />
'''Female fan''': Mm.<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> When you're going to uh find yourself a woman, you just try to stay calm. And uh be polite, friendly. Don't uh let your nerves get the best of ya.<br />
'''Fan''': What should I say, what should I say here, y'know, to the girl?<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Start with "hello" and "how are you".<br />
'''Fan''': Should I ask her, should I like do a pick-up line? Do those work?<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Um, sometimes. But I wouldn't, I wouldn't exactly count on it in a desperate situation. But I mean like uh, talk about yourself a little bit saying like, "Ooh did you read in the paper today about this article that really caught my eye?"<br />
'''Fan''': I was thinking about standing by the wall with a sign. Saying that I need a girlfriend?<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, don't- don't do that. That makes you look retarded.<br />
(Laughter)<br />
'''Other fan''': What about wearing a sticker that says you're single. Have you ever tried that? Do you think that would work?<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what was that? A stick-<br />
'''Other fan''': Wearing like a uh, a sticker that says "I'm single".<br />
'''Fan''': Wait a second I'm not done yet.<br />
'''Other fan''': Oh I'm sorry.<br />
'''Fan''': I got that idea from your comic. I mean I thought it was a-<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. I later learned that that, I already learned from my mother that made me look retarded. (Female fan laughs) To other people, so...<br />
'''Other fan''': Ohh. (unintelligible)<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So I stop- So I stopped- So I stopped doing that a long time ago and, I don't know (what payed attention?)<br />
'''Fan''': Oh.<br />
(pause)<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mm. Basically I'm running from others that have offered such advice.<br />
'''Female fan''': Oh yeah like John Tesh I remember that in your news dash.<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. And also it's like uh there's an expression in my elementary somewhere uh, those who can't teach.<br />
'''Female fan''': Ah.<br />
'''Fan''': Um, I remember (unintelligible). Um, I was um, looking at um (something), how do you feel about Obama swearing in his book? Even read it out loud in the audiobook version.<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hm. (rustling and typing in the background) Hm. Ah, yeah I heard of that, didn't care much, didn't uh give much thought into it so... Uh swearing yeah don't care much for it.<br />
'''Fan''': So Chris I was just wondering uh, like can you hear me?<br />
'''Female fan''': I can hear you.<br />
'''Fan''': Uhh. Does wearing that medallion, does that attract females? I was thinking about making my own.<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) You could do what you want, to try and make yourself stand out. Um... But it depends on if you, it depends on other peoples' point of uh you I guess at this point, um... You might want to get a second opinion. I mean it's not like I can see you over da Mumble and uh say what makes you look okay and what makes you look NOT okay. Yeah, g- get a second opinion from somebody else in person.<br />
'''Fan''': What about you, do you think that medallion makes you look, y'know, more attractive to girls?<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhmmm. Yeah. Yeah I don't know. I don't know.<br />
'''Fan''': Yeah I think it looks pretty cool on you. So that's, yeah.<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well you could try it, see if you could try and see if it works for ya.<br />
'''Female fan''': Speaking, speaking of the medallion, I noticed you wear it on the outside. Have you ever done any replacing the chain on it to something a little more comfortable?<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh no. It's fine. It's fine. I mean I'd say that this uh the necklace chain with the like a pair- like a pair of- like a pair of keyrings with a belt buckle on them.<br />
'''Female fan''': Mm. Alright.<br />
(typing noises)<br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris in hentai, the uh guys- like the girls usually say no but the, the guy touches her a bit and she gets into it. I was just wondering if you think that really works, have you ever tried that?<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh. I'm sorry, could you repeat that?<br />
'''Other fan''': I said in hentai, y'know the Japanese um, kinda pornography-<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Yeah-<br />
'''Other fan''': -usually, the, the girl kind of says no but then the guy starts touching her boobs or something and she gets real excited and gets into it. I was just wondering if you think that really works. Can you just make a girl excited and into you just like t hat?<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhh... Yeah I don't think so. I me- I mean in most of the time I'm sure you would probably just, the girl would probably just turn around and slap you right in the face or kick you in the groin.<br />
(Various pained groans)<br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, you were saying it's educational. I think I saw that in a porn too.<br />
'''Other fan''': Uh. Also (unintelligible) asked "How far have you gotten with a girl"?<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I've never even been on a first date in my lifetime.<br />
'''Female fan''': Ohhh.<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> At this point.<br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris?<br />
(Fans talk over each other)<br />
'''Other fan''': I was suggesting uh Chris, I have family in Bristow, Virginia. I've been out there a lot. And you know, they're- I mean, people that I've seen in Virginia don't really like anime and things that much. Have you ever considered maybe trying to meet a girl in the west coast? Because a lot of people, especially universities are into anime culture. <br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sigh) Yeah but I'm no- I'm not planning on traveling outside of my state. Plus I would prefer to keep it local.<br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah.<br />
(pause)<br />
(Everyone talks over each other)<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but to see the world means to have to have the money to actually go see the world.<br />
'''Fan''': Well You just have to save up a little bit.<br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah. I mean you know, trains are good.<br />
'''Female fan''': (strange incognizable noise)<br />
'''Other fan''': Gas is cheap now.<br />
'''Other fan''': You can meet so many people just going on a road trip or just you know, taking the bus or something I mean it's not too expensive, it's cheaper than a plane- (Chris talks over him)<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. Yeah, I hear you on that. But I just like, you know, if I want to go on a road trip I'd uh, I would not like to go it alone. I'd like to have my sweetheart by my side.<br />
'''Female fan''': Mmm.<br />
'''Fan''': The point is you could always get a job. That's what I did once a-(cut off)<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
(transcribing end for now at 1:31:06)<br /><br />
<br />
<br />
{{Transcription}}<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 6|Mumble Chat 6]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 8|Mumble Chat 8]]|}}<br />
<br />
==Links==<br />
* [https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBWklfakp0TGdDSkU Download]<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
<br />
[[Christian's sex joke]] - Used during this chat.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_7&diff=163080Mumble 72012-09-27T20:42:50Z<p>Irisviel: </p>
<hr />
<div>'''Mumble 7''' is the seventh of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]], held on 13 [[February 2009]].<br />
<br />
Appears to be the genesis for the "Power" videos in which Chris attempts and fails to prove his [[I AM STRONG|strength]] and [[CWC Fighter|fighting]] [[Challenge For Clyde|skill]], though these would not materialize for several months.<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
* A fan talks to Chris about putting naked posters of girls and pictures of men up in his room up to find out if his friend was a [[homo]] as Chris suggested. He tells Chris that his girlfriend dumped him over the posters and his friend ignored all of them. Chris sees nothing wrong with his advice until Julie tells him that she wouldn't like that. Chris recommends sending an anonymous letter explaining the situation and utterly fails to apologize or show concern.<br />
* Fans point out that Chris shouldn't have to show and prove that he is straight.<br />
* Chris cuts a fan off to let Julie ask a question involving [[pedofork|shota]].<br />
* Fans ask Chris to turn his radio down.<br />
* Chris uses Wal-Mart printer paper & RSVP ballpoint pen to draw, and a 50-pack of Crayola markers to color. Refuses to use color pencils or Photoshop to color, saying he prefers the markers.<br />
* Chris talks about Omicron's redone version of [[Sonichu]], accusing him of plagiarism. Says that the difference between what Omicron is doing and what he is doing is that Sonichu is his. Agrees to let Omicron continue if he credits Chris with the copyright.<br />
* '''Julie is convincing Chris to make videos proving to Clyde how strong he is.''' Chris feels that the [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|dildo breaking video]] proved this. Fans say that Chris's dildo comes apart naturally for cleaning.<br />
* '''A fan recommends making a video showing off his fighting moves to scare Clyde.'''<br />
* Chris is asked why he would use a dildo in proving that he is straight. Chris says that he is straight for crushing it, fans call him a [[homo]] for keeping it.<br />
* Chris [[lie|denies]] [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|using the dildo]], and claims that it's now broken. Fan says it could easily be reassembled. Chris is adamant that it was glued and that it took a lot of strength to pull it apart.<br />
* When asked by Julie, '''Chris admits using super-shears from Cutco to break the dildo glue, claiming to use a lot of strength in the process'''.<br />
* Fans discuss [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]]. Chris insists that it was drawn in protest of [[ED]]. He says it was anonymous, as most women have long brown hair and her eyes were censored.<br />
* Insists that [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:AngelicainGod%27sEyes.JPG the Rule 34 of Angelica Rosechu] is masturbating and enjoying it, and is using her hand to do it.<br />
* Chris thinks Billy Mays is on Home Improvement.<br />
* Chris isn't doing anything on Valentine's Day, as Julie is not there yet.<br />
* Chris discusses the the No-Redheads policy in his [[Love Quest]]. Says that redheads don't attract him unless they are not natural redheads. No piercings or tattoos allowed.<br />
* Chris is OK with blue hair.<br />
* Does a terrible Marge Simpson impersonation.<br />
* Chris impersonates Comic Book Guy and Donald Duck.<br />
* A fan presents the possibility that AIDS was sent by God to kill the [[homos]].<br />
* [[Chris and Religion|Premarital sex being forbidden in Christianity]] is discussed. Chris fumbles for an explanation.<br />
* '''A fan pretending to be black says he believes the government made AIDS to get rid of black people. Chris says that that's the kind of thing a black guy would say'''.<br />
* Premarital sex comes up again. Chris compares it to using porn to practice and learn skills for later.<br />
* The fake black fan calls Chris on his comment from earlier about black guys and AIDS. He makes the excuse that someone else said it first.<br />
* Questions on Sonichu start. Sonichu doesn't wear clothes because it's a comic. Chris isn't sure how [[Blake]] sounds. He might sound black, he might sound like Shadow the Hedgehog. The fake black fan asks why the bad guy has to be black, also mentioning [[Silvana]]. Chris says that he doesn't have to be.<br />
* Chris gets annoyed about the pronunciation of [[Rosechu]] as popularized by the Old Narrator of the [[Audiobooks]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't disagree that the Audiobooks made Sonichu more popular that he ever did'''.<br />
* He doesn't mind fanfics that don't portray Sonichu in a bad light.<br />
* The audio goes low in the main chat and a fan has a private, unrelated conversation for a few minutes.<br />
* Audio comes back as Chris is admitting that the [[B-Manajerk]] was black in real life.<br />
* Chris doesn't watch the news, so doesn't have an opinion on [[Barack Obama|Obama]]. He voted for him because he saw a documentary where he saw more of himself in Obama, namely that he was an outcast at one point.<br />
* A fan says that you should vote based on politics, not personality. Chris says that he is a moderate.<br />
* Chris doesn't know what the financial bailout is. He says that he drew the [[Sonichu 8#The Elevator Gags|racist picture]] of Obama based on his father's joke, before he saw the documentaries that made him vote.<br />
* Chris will not agree or disagree with interracial dating/marriage. He would want a white woman, but he would be [[gal pals|friends]] with others.<br />
* He'd marry an Asian.<br />
* It's not yet known if Silvana will be a good guy or if she will lose her [[pickle|dick]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't know what he wanted to be when he was younger, he's just making it up as he goes along'''.<br />
* '''Chris is keeping the name changes in the comics for legal reasons'''.<br />
* A fan suggests Slaweel cursing Rosechu to have a dick. Chris gets upset before saying that he'll think about it. The fans think it's a great idea. One considers a talking penis for Rosechu. Chris says it's a stupid idea.<br />
* Another fan asks about Chris being sacked from Wendy's. He denies scaring the child with his Donald Duck impersonation, saying that he didn't make him cry.<br />
* Chris might release his DVD one day.<br />
* A fan says that Chris has influenced underground rappers such as Immortal Technique, who has sampled him.<br />
* Chris takes requests. Impersonates MC Hammer, Dr Nick Riviera, Peter from [[Family Guy]], Mario and Sonic, butchering them all and tainting our childhood memories.<br />
* More Sonichu questions. '''Chris won't upload [[Zapina]] [[Rule 34]] because she is underage and Chris is worried about legal ramifications'''. When he is reassured that this would be legal, he says he would consider it. He will also consider Sonichu-Rosechu anal sex. Rosechu would not clean the [[pickle]] with her mouth, she would clean it off with a washcloth. He would not sell the the washcloth on EBay.<br />
* Chris calls a stop to the potty humor displayed throughout the Sonichu questions.<br />
* '''Chris denies that [[Yawning Squirtle]] is a character'''.<br />
* Fans ask for a joke. He recites a dreadful rhyme about Videogame consoles. He then tells his awful [[Christian's sex joke|sex joke]]. Fans start to tell racist jokes about [[niggos|black people]] and Mexicans. Chris calls for a stop to this.<br />
* A fan says that his friend [[mass debating|masturbated]] to the [[rule 34|adult section of Sonichu]] and is now worried that his friend is a [[homo]], as they were drawn by a man. '''Chris says that this is what he intended it for''', and they are drawings of women, so his friend is straight. He doesn't masturbate to his own drawings.<br />
* Chris reassures a fan that [[Mass Debating|masturbating]] in the same room as another man isn't gay as long as both men are thinking of women, but he would not do this.<br />
* Chris offers no comment as to what constitutes adultery.<br />
* Chris says that he is patriotic. Asked to sing the national anthem, he instead mangles a few lines of "My Country, 'Tis of Thee". He then tells a 'patriotic' joke that is insensitive to Mexicans. [[Chris and Hypocrisy|The fans call him on his "no more racist jokes" statement from earlier]].<br />
* Chris does a poor impersonation of Mr T.<br />
* Chris says that if you are married, sleeping with someone else isn't cheating if you have consent from your spouse.<br />
* Chris gives more advice on homos and recommends Axe body spray for attracting girls.<br />
* Chris has not met any celebrities, only local DJs.<br />
* Does impersonations of Homer Simpson and Bender. The two sound identical.<br />
* Chris gives dating advice: Stay calm, polite, friendly and don't let your nerves get the best of you. Say "Hello, how are you" and talk about yourself. '''[[Barbara|His mom]] told him that standing around with a sign makes him look retarded. A female fan cracks up laughing and can't stop'''.<br />
* "Those who can't, teach"<br />
* Chris says he has never even been on a date. Rejects dating suggestions from fans.<br />
* '''Chris was close with Sarah "[[PandaHalo]]" McKenzie, but hasn't heard from her in over two weeks. He heard about the fires and doesn't know if she's still alive. When a fan adds that 108 people were killed in the fires, Chris responds to the entire ordeal with [[Chris and death|"It's OK though, at least I have a good woman who's willing to be by my side at this point"]]'''.<br />
* When pushed, he says he feels remorse for the the victims of the fires and is concerned that [[Sarah Cassandra McKenzie|Panda]] is dead.<br />
* He asserts that he didn't abandon Sarah for [[Julie]].<br />
* '''A fan says that if [[PandaHalo|Sarah]] isn't alive, Chris should take solace that her perfectly barbecued remains fed the survivors. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|SHUT UP!!!]]'''<br />
* Chris says that he cares about Sarah and Julie equally and wouldn't dump Julie as a friend. A fan asks what he will do to the survivors who ate Sarah. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|"SHUT UP!!!"]] and demands that he be booted.<br />
* Fans reassure Chris that Sarah is probably OK.<br />
* Chris does abominable impersonations of Uncle Ruckus from The Boondocks and Hank Hill. '''He sings "Don't Trust Them New [[Niggos|Niggas]] Over There"'''. He also impersonates Meowth and sings the Team Rocket song.<br />
* [[Clyde]] enters. Chris refuses to answer questions and leaves.<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
===Chris proves he is straight===<br />
'''Guy:''' Chris!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all! ''[echoes]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'll be damned.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh, Chris-[gets cut off by another guy]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh you know, can't com- it's uh, can't complain.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' How's construction of the site?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' [unintelligible] so Chris<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I...I need to ask you something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yup?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh... I put those posters, of the... Playboy and everything in my room, and uh, one of my girlfriends saw it, and she got mad at me for looking at other w-... other girls, and she broke up with me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh... I'm sorry to hear that. It could-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, she's calling me a pervert. I-I don't understand this.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Did you... did you ex- did you try to explain to her about situation between you and that guy?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I... I did, and I don't think she understood.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... well, you should try, you should, uh, s-... try, uh, you should try wr-, you should tr-, uh, do you know her email address?<br /><br />
[pause]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So, uh Chris-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' A-also, wait... also, uh, the friend, I was talking about, he, uh, visited, and [typing noises] he, uh, he went into my room, and didn't even notice the posters. He just s-sat in the middle, he didn't s...sit in any uh, part of the room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Huh. Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, uh... so, yeah, I don't know. I mean, my girlfriend broke up with me, called me a pervert, said that I shouldn't be looking at other girls, I mean... I don't know what to do now.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well listen, uh, answer my question, do you have her email address?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Umm... yeah, but she won't... she won't answer me anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm... ok, hmm. Here's what you can do, uh... Do you know your girlfriend's... any of your girlfriend's [[Gal pal|gal-pals]]?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm... well, you should try to... like wr- you should write out... hmm... hmm... here's an idea. S- Write a letter to her and send it via smail mai-, via snail mail, but don't write the return address. On it.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What should I write?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just like, you know, like, they, you know, this is... you know, this is... you, uh, you put your name there, and you, it's, and then you would basically explain the situation between you and that guy, and that's why you had the posters up, well that's why you put the posters up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't really understand what was the point of the posters in the first place?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[sigh]'' it's... ''[sigh]'' if he looks at... if he, if he is very interested, if he is, if he was straight, he would uh, look at the women. Very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But he didn't even notice them. He didn't notice any of the posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, then I guess he is a [[Homos|homo]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' W...well, um, he wasn't looking at anything, not even the guy posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Hmm... He's not blind, surely.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, like, what is he, is he like, uh...I don't know.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I don't know either, man. But, you know at the moment I would suggest you, uh, write the- write the letter to your girlfriend, send the mail, don't write your return address on the envelope, and, uh, mail it to her.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Also my mom saw the posters and she got offended, she's like really religious and st- she said that like, uh, you know, lust is a sin or some shit. Oh, like she said, she's like all against the, the uhh, the like, Playboy in my room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, your- apparently your mom hasn't been [beeps] that open minded that time. So, you know, give her time to reh-cover, she'll uh, she might op- she might open up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I don't think that was a good idea though, I mean, w-why did-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -you suggest it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I was trying to see if he, to, I was trying to s-help you figure out if your uh, if your friend was a homo or not.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I know, but, do you have uh, [Fans talking] Playboy posters in your room?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unclear] I'm very forward.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I have uh, poster of some, of uh, I have a poster in my room of uh, some uh, naked girls I got from adamandeve.com as a bonus.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Then, nobody says anything about it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[clears throat]'' Well, I didn't really have too many oppor- too many people in my room. So, it's kind of like in a hard to notice place.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Um, wondering, um, If you showed anyone, wouldn't they be offended?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe, maybe not, [Fan grunts] it just depends on their point of view.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I wouldn't want the same thing that happened to me to happen to you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I hear you there. Uh, just to so just sound clear... Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie, are you there?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ok, uh, would you be offended if you saw such a poster in my room?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''[breaks up]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, What will, what was that? [Echoes]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie'''</span> Yes I would, kind of.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well that's no problem, I can take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, see that's what I'm talking about, I mean...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, that's why I asked Julie right now, because I respect her. So, because she said that she would, I will take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I've been thinking, um...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you have... [unclear] Chris, I don't think you should look at other woman.[sic] In my opinion.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I see, Julie. Well that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I...I respect that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' She might get jealous, I mean, that's what happened to my...my girlfriend.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, that's fine Julie, I respect your, I respect that. Just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey, can I ask you a question? If uh, he's done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, uh, one more thing, um, you know I've been thinking, uh, I don't really think you need, you know, posters and stuff like,<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' to prove you're straight, I mean, if you're straight, that's all there is to it i-if, am I right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think you're right.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I...I mean, you shouldn't have to prove that you're straight.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> You're right.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I m-mean [line breaks temporarily] Y-you shouldn't have to reassure yours-self. You should just be knowing it, and nothing anybody says, should get very, uh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, it's ve-ah-very-but you see, I have like, I have that [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] in my room, it's just, so that like, you know, for in case I have any-for in case I have any random thoughts, on account really, to tempt me.<br /><br />
''[unintelligible mix of chatter from most participants trying to get their word in]''<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I mean, even if they're random thoughts, even if they're random thoughts, if you know you're ''positive'' about it, you shouldn't have to look at anything to make sure.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, usually.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay. Uh, moving on from all this homosexuality, uh, I have one question, uh- [gets cut off by Chris in the background] ...never mind, [fat douchebag?]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey, ah, let Julie ask a question, let Julie ask her question.<br /><br />
<br />
===7:08 Julie asks about shotacon===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, I was watching you on the Internet yesterday and, what's a shotacon?[slightly cut off]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...I'm sorry, uh-y, I'm sorry, you got cut off, what was that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> What's a sho-[cuts off again]-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...What's a...''short''?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Shot-[cuts off third time, pretty obvious she's saying ''shota'']-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dude, shota.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, shota.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ssshhhh...shota?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, S-H-O-A-T-A [sic].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, it's a word he found online.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, [baby?], yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never heard of that word.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I dunno, if you want to look it up, you can probably find out on an online dictionary...<br /><br />
''[pause, and a weary sigh from someone other than Chris]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'll-I'll take a look. Hang on.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I know some Japanese and I think I've heard that somewhere, like in a magazine or something.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, it's some of that Japanese shit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Probably is. Three moments, I'll look it up.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Okay!<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's radio is audible]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Whoops, that was the wrong one. The wrong bookmark.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' S-H-O-T-A.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I know, I just get the wrong bookmark for...place I wi-for like...dictionary-type website that I have.<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's keyboard taps are audible]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uhhh...Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, now that Julie's done with her question, I also had one.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' He has to find what that means first.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, ''I'm sorry''.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Shit, ah shit, I've just found it on Wikipedia. It's, uh, it's a ma-it's a Japanese name. It's a name of a person. In Japan.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Really.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a Japanese name. I think it's-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh no no, I think you're looking at the wrong thing, it's S- S-H-O-T-A-C-O-N.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> S-H- I mean- O-T-A-C-O-N? Shotacon?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's the same thing, just put C-O-N at the end.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I've read it in a dictionary before, can't remember what it means...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, oh! Okay, here it is, uh..."shotacon, sometimes shortened to shota, is Japanese slang of the phrase 'Shotaro Complex'"...uh..."that describes the attraction to young boys or an individual with such an attraction".<br /><br />
''[Disgusted reactions heard]''<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh my god, what the fuck?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' There's lots of sick people. Y'all are gonna get ricked?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Someone from 4 cent garbage came in and told us to look that up, I didn't-I didn't even want to.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess he's a homo...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Don't worry I banned him already.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Um, Chris, Vivian wants to know if you can like, turn your radio down a bit, it's distracting.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yes, please turn it down.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I thought that was quiet enough, here.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, no, the lady'll probably pick it up<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Alright cool. Merci.<br /><br />
<br />
===10:21 Another fan asks about art supplies===<br />
<br />
'''Another Fan:''' Okay, um, I have a question, um, I like to draw—interrupted by mumbling—I like to draw comics and such, I mean I want to start up a webcomic. What kind of materials do you use?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, like, you mean for drawing?<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well mostly I just use like, uh, paper without lines, like, computer printer paper you can get in, like, Wal-Mart, for an inexpensive price in multiples.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then I use like an RES—RSVP-brand pen with the black ink.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh okay, is it like, um, a gel pen or a ballpoint pen or-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like a ballpoint, it's like a ballpoint pen.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What do you use to color?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I use Crayola brand markers.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would like to—I would—I would—I would recommend getting the Super Tip 50-pack which you can also find at the Wal-Mart.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay. I-[interrupted by someone else on chat]<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's basically-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' At Wal-Mart I usually get the 24-color RoseArts. Those are—those do pretty good too.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhh, Vivian, just so you—just so you know, I'm using the microphone that came with Hey You, Pikachu for Nintendo Sisty-Four [sic].<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, yeah no, no offense, but uh, personally I prefer like, colored pencils and shit cause-[Chris mumbling is heard]-they're like easier to erase. Photoshop [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If you want to use colored pencils that's fine, I'm not, uh, saying that you have to use Crayola markers-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why don't you use colored pencils? They're really good, you should try one on like, at least one page, just try one. One page with just colored pencils.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But um, actually, you can—you can scan your drawings and then color—color them in like, Photoshop or something. [rest of chat murmurs in agreement] That looks really professional, and really good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I prefer using the markers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's just that I-I mean—I mean I've tried—I mean I've colored with colored pencils before, and I just feel best with using markers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I have a question, um, uh, the Hey You Pikachu microphone, how does that work on the, you're using that on your computer? Did you say?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah it's just, yeah, it's like you plug it into uh, into the basic microphone jack.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh, yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Excuse me, I have a nice little Plantronics headset.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Hey Chris can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah, hang on a second, uh... uh, Omicron, that's uh, you're basically, uh, you're basically plagiarizing here. You're even using, uh, parts of my original drawings to, uh, make up your so called real ones and, you're just—you're just parroting—you're just plagiarizing-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's dirty and illegal.<br /><br />
[Unintelligible mumbling]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, you said so yourself, you're being illegal. And plus, and plus I'm-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, isn't combining Sonic with Pikachu the same thing?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, but, but but also, look at this, also I'm looking at this site here, it said, he's claiming the copyright for himself, but he's, but he's not. I mean that's like, but he's, he—he says<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' You need to ban him immediately.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, ban him immediately.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh wait wait wait wait wait...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah maybe you should check-[interrupted by loud noise, probably Chris]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well he said that, he's saying that all of Sonichu material is copyrighted by him, when it's clearly not.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah but you use Sonic and Pikachu, and you copyrighted it-<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' He just offered to give you credit-[interrupted by noisy chatter]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean, I put, I mean, yeah but, I mean, I'm talking about the—the Omnicron [sic] guy here, that's like, just put this link here.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh he offered to give you credit-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes that's the same thing you did.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well no no, he, no-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We decided-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No he's plagiarizing MY Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We just decided [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris it's, it's a parody, kinda like Sonichu is.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but he—yeah, but he's saying, he said—he—on his front page he says, all Sonichu material-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah but he's, he just offered to change it, so are you okay with that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> By changing it to Sonichu X-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, he said he'll give you credit instead of claiming it for himself.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, uh, yeah I would appreciate that, that would be better, yeah, if... he changed that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Alright cool.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Problem solved.<br /><br />
<br />
===15:02 Chris talks about dildos to prove his strength===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes Julie.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you think you could tell everyone about my idea? And, since you're going to do it do you think you could tell everyone so they could look out for it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, your idea... um, oh oh oh, yeah, just basically a video of me standing up to Clyde and showing him how strong I am, doin' a few kicks for the camera or something-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, you should throw some punches, show him what you're made of, you know?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Kick, punch, it's all in the mind ''etc.''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I basically... I pretty much did that when I...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Let him talk, c'mon!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I pretty much did - already proved my strength when I... ripped that... ''dildo'' in half.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Foreign-Sounding Guy:''' Most dildos come apart for cleaning.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' C'mon.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but that thing was screwed together at the seam.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok listen to me...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris...<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' Eh Chris!<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ...could you do a like further test of your strength for me?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''stress sigh'' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I wanna see how strong you are please.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...That's fine, I can do that.<br /><br />
'''Other Fan:''' I mean that's ok, you showed your strength, but you should show her your moves. Like show her, like, what kind of moves you can do.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, let me tell you a story about how this'll work, ok.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' See, my, uh, one of my cousins, uh, this guy at school, kept, y'know, picking on him, calling him gay and stuff, and trying to fight with him, and my cousin told him to sss- y'know, one day, the guy said "Hey man, I'm gonna beat you up" and my cousin said "Look, if I show you some of my moves, I'll prove to you I can kick your ass in a fight" and so my cousin, y'know, he stepped back and, he took, uh, he took Tae Kwon Do, and he did a couple moves, y'know? He just stood there for like five minutes just doing his moves, and, y'know, some punches and kicks and... The guy just backed right off; he didn't even want to talk to him any more. So I think that should work.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> All right, well I'll try that. I'll try that.<br/><br />
'''Guy:''' All right. Sounds good.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br?><br />
'''Fan:''' You try- you always mention about how you're straight but yet in your video about you crushing a dildo, uh, doesn't that kinda like, y'know, not help your cause?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, it proves I'm straight because...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' But you have a dildo.<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I got it free with an order on adameve.com<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' But you ''kept'' it and shit. That ain't cool.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' What I don't... Why were there batteries in...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh yeah Chris, why ''were'' there batteries in it? Why did you keep it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I mean...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it wasn't an easy thing for me to sell, right off the bat, or even to make a profit, so...<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In fact in a way it's a good thing I kept it, cause it allowed me to be able to break it, like I did.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes but why would you keep it?<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why would you keep it?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I woulda saved it for my sweetheart, if she'd wanted it. To use it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Aaaahhh.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But if I were there wouldn't you prefer the real deal?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Some things that metal just can't replace.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Yeah.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I heard that.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' You didn't use it did you?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No I did not.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Did you just throw all the ones you had away?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I only had that one. And there you go, I ri- there you go, I broke it apart.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you just, like, ''take'' it apart, I mean, it did...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' ...seem to come apart, like, screwed on...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I did not take it apart, that thing was glued at the seam. I had to put a lot of strength into breaking it at the middle there.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, but I think, um, showing your moves would be better.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Right.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Clyde would mess with you if you show him you can kick his ass.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey, Chris's a muthafuckin' ''gangsta''!<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Blap blap.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yes, Chris will fuck Clyde's shit up.<br /><br />
(awkward pause)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait, Chris, didn't you say you used a - didn't you say you used scissors to break the dildo?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I pretty much did have to so I could break that ''glued seam''.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, I thought you broke it with your hands.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well I- yeah well I would have but it was dang glued at the seam, so I clipped straight in with the scissors I had.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a pair of Super Shears from [[Cutco]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(feigning interest)'' Huh.<br /><br />
<br />
===19:50 Chris defends his Rule 34===<br />
<br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, let's talk about something else. Uh, Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whenever the announcement of the adult Sonichu page, when I looked at your gallery, very nice stuff, you know, I see a picture of what looks like you with a Sonichu, uh, medallion. Like, and, who's that one girl, exactly?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Who, [[Megan]]?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I thought it was, like, [[Crystal]], cause of the hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, it was - it was originally drawn to be Megan but I censored her eyes to, uh, port- to protect her identity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Mmmmmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''(laughing)'' That's stupid! (?) That's so silly.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I drew that after I found the ED page in November.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you say that?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In protest against it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thought you were going to get rid of it anyway.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I tore up the original drawing, I, in- into squares, and I put in in an envelope.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you upload it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you do that shit? Like, and...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I understand Rosechu, but, like y'know, why, like, something that's from real life. That's the problem (?)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's not necessarily from real life, it depends on you inter- it depends on your interpretation, I mean it's hardly- I mean, '''most women have long brown hair, and the eyes are censored''', so...<br/><br />
(laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''Most'' women?!?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I remember in that one video you were saying it was Megan.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because it broke, because it end up, because it the end it broke up my friend - broke up my friendship eve, my uh, friendship with Megan.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um, can I ask you a question? In the third picture, with [[Angelica Rosechu]], what is... what's happening, is... God... doing...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nope. She's masturbating. And she's enjoying it.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But she has no hands there. How's she doing it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' She's ''enjoying'' it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But she does... She does...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah but how's she doing it? She doesn't have her hands there.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> She does have her hands, she's... ''(stress sigh)'' She's... like most women would be able to do the same thing.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thing it's the angle, Julie. I think it's the angle you were looking at it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah plus uh, the picture wasn't, uh, very - wasn't as clear as, like, you know, I would have liked to have had it, uh, I mean, I had that file for a while, and it...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah some of those are kinda blurry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, some deg- some degraded.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ? a good question, have you drawn anything... of... have you drawn anything like that with me? Cause I would actually like to see, if you did. If so, could you, and let me see? I, uh, sorry, that's very rude to ask.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm sorry, let me answer this guy. Yeah, well, I made a retraction video later saying that I- I disowned that address.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ah, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just after that guy hacked into it and changed to it to suck. And as such.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hang on, I'm gonna take a look at that... My Youtube...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I like this song.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What song?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' The song that's playing in the background of, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what do you think of, uh, what do you think of that guy who advertises products, Billy Mays? What do you think of him?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... Billy... Oh! Yeah he's an ok guy, I watched him on Home Improvement.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Billy Mays?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, that was another guy on Home Improvement, Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No that was the same guy. That was the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Really?!? Let's look up. IMDB, go. ''(sound of typing)''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Believe me, it's the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, I really enjoyed your, um, adult, uh, section of the site.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... okey dokey, very good. Aaahh, trying to figure out how to update the link on this thing here. Oh, maybe under here. Oh there it is, thank God (?), update right now.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(singing)'' You spin me right round baby, right round...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (joining in) Like a record baby, right round round round<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's a classic, I can't help in man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There you are, updated. It's finally fixed.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Actually that was Richard Karn on Home Improvement, not Billy Mays.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well my mistake, I mean the guy had the beard and uhh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh yeah I can understand.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And the voice sounds- and the voice sounds the same...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah. They sound the same.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There's a matter of interpretation apparently I misinterpreted so I will admit that I was wrong.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah see we all make mistakes, don't be too hard on yourself.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unintelligible babble or singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you gotten any fan art submissions or notable? For the uh- webpage?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I got one today... It's like mostly a drawing of that uh that uh- of the fan herself.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -got in the snail mail today.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -Sunday.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hmmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What are you doing for this Valentine's day Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhm... I'm sorry, what was that question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What will you be doing this year on Valentine's day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm depends...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ahhh, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm.<br /><br />
Fan: Surely a man of such magnitude as yourself are going to be doing something important, aren't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Magnitude? Way to choose the words buddy.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Vocabulary talent.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, cause I don't have Julie over here yet.<br /><br />
(Reactions of OHs and AHs)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If she was here...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible) -play games.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Or we could just uh... talk.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Ehehehehe. Maybe... uh... why no redheads?<br /><br />
'''Other Woman:''' Yeah?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I was trying to think about that when the other guy asked that question. Uh... I was trying to think up that unh... mmmm... Uhhhh, redheads just don't be very- tract me so much.<br /><br />
Several: Uh, ah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's- it's- a- pi- a possibility that they're dyed.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmmmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But yeah y'know natural redheads enh, yeah, just don't really turn me on as much.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I see...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you thought about girls with um, highlights?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... (pause) aaahhhh... what turns me on hhh- (inhales) (pause) obviously the women.<br /><br />
'''Man:''' Gotta have the women. (?)<br /><br />
'''Guy''': What about piercings or tattoo?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, neither of those.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhhh-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris! How bout like non-orange hair, not like... no, never mind. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... oh... okay... hmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait Chris! How do you feel about blue hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Blue hair's okay, otherwise I wouldna- Otherwise I wouldn't've liked Sailor Mercury.<br /><br />
'''British? guy:''' That is true, she does have blue hair.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' She's a very fine character. There is no way to deny it.<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Blue hair is OFF DA HOOK!!!<br/><br />
<br />
===28:35 Chris impersonates various cartoon characters===<br />
<br />
'''British??? guy:''' Doesn't Marge Simpson have blue hair as well?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (in some kind of insane voice) Oh yeah! Marge Simpson has blue hair and it's as tall as the Empire State building!!!<br /><br />
(Some HMMs UHs and UMs follow)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yo Chris!! Can you do some impersonations for us?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Oh we'd love to hear that!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just did Marge Simpson.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah you're really talented.<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(Several people talking at once)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> -they're really good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Do another SimpsonsChris, how about Comic Book Guy?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Mmmmhmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I'm very indeed. Oh aren't we all promiscuous and whatnot. I like Batman and Robin, oh look! Stan Marsh has come into the thing again - I forget that guy's name, that guy who did the Marvel comics.<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Stan Lee. (Pause) Chris do your Donald Duck impression.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Everybody have fun (incoherent and scary quacking)<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris you should work for Disney.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's good Chris.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Have you ever considered being a voice actor?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Errrrrp... possibly, I'm not sure.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (incoherent, cut off by Chris)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent... another cartoon voice)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris, you're a Christian, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I was just wondering-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahm actu-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -do you just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm actually a Methodist church.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome, I was just wondering: Do you think AIDS was sent by god to kill the homos or do you think that it's just an accident or something man-made?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thou- the thought never occurred to me... thought never occurred to me.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' can you do an impression of Arnold Schwarzenegger?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hold- the question...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Let Chris answer the question.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thought- the thought never occurred to me about what you just said about the AIDS there mmmm... but y'know, it's a possibility and I will not agree nor disagree with it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I was just wondering I mean, I've had that discussion with some of my Christian friends. I just wanted to get your opinion, thank you.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmhhh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think (clears throat) I think Omicron has a point and you did tell me you went to a methodist church didn't you? So that's-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well th- well my Methodist church is uh more loose on- is not as strict on uh- on uh sex.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris I don't know- I don't know that much about religion in the States but I don't think there is a looser Meth- Methodist church. God makes the rules Omicron says.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, hmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well, you know personally I think that the government made AIDS to kill off all the brothers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whoa, whoa... That's what the blacks always say.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. (pause) I'm going to agree, that sounds like something that uh... well, a black guy would say.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So your church is kinda of uh- they let you do- their kinda loose on the whole moral restrictions?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... (pause) uhhh... that's... what's the question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Your church they- you said they're kind of more uh- y'know they're less strict on the whole moral thing, like, as far as sexuality goes? Right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -ah basically.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But y'know, uhh, I thought you're supposed to listen to the Bible or whatever not, y'know, not necessarily- no, never mind.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (interrupts)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, there's also a uh, there's also a- think about this uh, if you uh- if you- if you were a think uh- you have to find for yourself a good meaning behind uh- good meaning behind watching pornography to uh- like teach how it- how to do this and that when you actually get around to doing it...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's all ???<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's all's considered education for yourself.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' How is that realistic at all?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, it's uh- not a really good thing to learn from, trust me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It can be done before marriage as well as long as me and my sweetheart really love each other very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But not in Christianity.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But all I'm saying is y'know, porn is completely, completely unre- unrealistic I mean you can't really learn anything from it.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It gives- it gives you enough ideas.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unclear)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (incoherent) porn.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' When you actually have sex, it's nothing like porn.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe not like you, you not gonna do it-<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' You can't do it immediately- immediately anal sex cause most women are not very happy with anal sex and also...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay, shut up<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' -and also weird-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Shut up.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Yes.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And... that wasn't cool, like...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That was uncalled for...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, like, suthin' a BLACK MAN would say...<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' That's racist man...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, somebody said it on here first before I did.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Does that make it ok?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, I think he's trying to make it clear that- I dunno.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I typically agree with that guy.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So nothing g- it doesn't make it ok.<br /><br />
(incoherent)<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling) I wi- I'm sorry, I take it back.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(unclear)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Guys can we get back to Sonichu, Please?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah this is getting ridiculous.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unclear) -Sonichu actually.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Anyway, my question is that: why does Sonichu not wear clothes while Rosechu and the other Rosechus do wear clothes? And underwear?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Aaaaaaaaaamp... It's like uh- it's basically a cartoon and it doesn't really matter, it's like... mm... think about this: Most cartoon characters wear at least one article of clothing. At least one article. And uh- it's like Yogi Bear who just wears a necktie and a hat.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 35.14)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Other Guy:''' I think it would be cool if all the Sonichus and Rosechus got together and they and- they all formed a big team and they had special uniforms or something, kinda like the X-men.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Or Power Rangers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh yeah, I don't do- I don't do well- I'm not in- no uniforms. It's a uniform and other Sonichus and Rosechus.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'm just wondering if you'd do another impression: What does Blachu sound like? Uh, Black Sonichu? Or Blake?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eeeeuuunh... Eh... ahhhh...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Can you imitate it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... I'm not sure... uhhhhm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Like does he sound black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Possibly, but I'm not certain. I'm not leaning towards it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I'd like to hear it, but if you don't want...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just never- I just never really thought about that. I'd say that he possibly sounds similar to uh, y'know Shadow the hedgehog. But he could possibly sound, black. He could. Don't quote me on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' All right, I was just wondering if you'd do his voice but...<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Hey why does the BAD guy gotta be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never said the bad guy "has to" be black. (pause) I mean, look at the- the range of villanies, I mean there's black and whites and uh... male females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I noticed that uh- Silvana's also... black lookin'.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just decided to color her black because she was born- she came from outer space from a black egg, which was the- which came out of the rainbow.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah, I was also wonderin' about that like-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I- I- I-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' If Silvana came out of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes it's-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Why would she be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' I mean like black ain't part of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like the black sheep of the family. Y'know you put all the colors together and it does become black.<br /><br />
(unintelligible reactions)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -like a brownish-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) is a (unintelligible) color.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Maybe it's because she's from space and there's not a lot of light in space and it's dark or something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah that- a uh yeah- that's one of the-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hmmm.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhm, did you look at the link of my friend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, ummmm...<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Yeah, since you love blue hair.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh- no I haven't looked at it and I don't wanna make Julie feel jealous if I did- if I went and did.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Julie would mind.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhhh...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You look at pornography don't you?<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' (mumble)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, that- that was two syllables "Rose-chu". You don't- don't add- don't say the "e" it's just "Rosechu".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah you went over this last chat.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>(I don't know, it sounds like "narrator")<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sounds like he says "narrator" again)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh... I was just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, well, obviously the uh- the narrator who did those audio books was incorrect. Specially since I never gave that person the approval to do the audiobooks.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think it's just a fan project and I think he-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' and I think he might have one of the West coast dialects. I know that the South they say y'all but over here-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well obviously he lied-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -different. I'd be proud if they made one of my projects into an audiobook though. That means that there are a lot of fans out there that really like it.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Ay.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' They're not selling to try and make any money off it. They're not trying to rip you off. They always made sure- they always narrate the first page by saying "Christian Weston Chandler" so they're not trying to cheat you or anything.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' The people know you're making it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I- I hear that. I just, apparently they misin- misinterpreted the (audio breaks up) name Rosechu. Or mispronounced it. Misinterpreted, mispronounce- fairly the same thing in that situation... possibly. To answer that question... possibly.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uh, Vivian said that the audiobooks made Sonichu way popular that- than you could ever ever do on your own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I will not disagree with the statement. And I appreciate her help.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris. Would you be offended if a fan wrote a fanfiction about Sonichu?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Faaanfiction... if it's- if it's not demeaning or makes them look stupid. Then it's fine- it's fine. (pause) Like I did mind when, shoot, what's his name? That guy... uhhhh... that guy that the uhhhh... did the animations, on his computer.<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' You did mind or you didn't?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Animations???<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think I know what he's talking about. Are you talking about the um...<br /><br />
<br />
(background noise begins)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' Well the original play was a Greek play. Where they're all y'know... Greeks... and crazy stuff happens and they're all runnin' around in togas. So if you ever wanna see the movie "A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum" it was a classic and it had some real classic people from the 50s and 60s in it. Kinda like "It's a MAD MAD MAD MAD World". Sort of a classic old school movie from funny old school world. First color movie type thing. But that'll be a high school play. You'll wanna see that. You might actually enjoy it. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
(inaudible response)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' You never know that might be fun to do. Well I guess that wouldn't work on the weekend then... you gotta...<br /><br />
<br />
'''(FOR THOSE OF YOU WONDERING WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON, IT APPEARS THAT THERE WAS SOME TECHNICAL PROBLEM THAT CAUSED ANOTHER MUMBLE CHANNEL TO BE RECORDED WHILE THE CONVERSATION WITH CHRIS BECAME BARELY AUDIBLE BACKGROUND NOISE. INSTEAD ALL THAT CAN BE HEARD IS SOME BUTTFACE YAMMERING ABOUT FILMS AND TELEVISION SHOWS. I'M NOT GOING TO KEEP TRANSCRIBING IT. CHRIS IS STILL TALKING AND ANSWERING QUESTIONS, BUT NOTHING CAN BE UNDERSTOOD OVER THESE GUYS.)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''(AT 42.56 THE AUDIO SUDDENLY RESUMES NORMALLY)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Unknown person:''' Uh you-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I uh- noticed he's another BLACK villain.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah in real life he was black. Without meaning any offense to the uh- black guy in general, cause you've noticed, among the Jerkops there's uh- we got black's and white's, males and females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(several people jump in at once)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) -you've never drawn a female officer before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well y'know uhhh... uhhh, comic book number 7, near the end. Near the end of the time travel episode. Uhh, I have no opinion about what Obama's doing cause I don't watch the news.<br /><br />
Accented woman: But you voted for him, didn't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes I voted for him because I saw myself in him when I com- when I saw both the documentaries and downloaded them for the Playstation Network between Obama and McCain. I mean voted for a person I saw more of myself of-<br /><br />
Accented woman: You usually vote for someone based on their political leanings, not how you view them. As I were Republican, I voted for John McCain. Not because I liked him but because I- he had the same political views as me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basi- basically I'm a moderate.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh, I see. Um, I was wondering. I was reading opinions: do you agree with his financial bailouts?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm, I don't even know what it is. So I can't disagree or agree.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Well, to make it short um, it's about uh- the government- President Obama is planning to uh- a new one- (cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You got cut off there.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uhh, ok, we lost him.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yo, Chris, uh, do you, you didn't just vote for Obama cause he was black, did you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I did not vote for him because he was black. I voted for him cause I saw myse- because I saw myself in him. In like, similar lifestyles. And I saw that he was a good man, I mean after all, com- I saw- I saw I watched both of the A&E documentaries, before I can- before I knew who I would vote for.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 45.29)'''<br /><br />
<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris:, Chris what did you see in him that you say in your self?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Like for one thing we were like outcasts, at least one point in our lives.<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Wait, wait hold up earlier you said that you thought he would probably paint the white house black.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh oh that was my father’s joke he said that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Is your father a racist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but you see I drew that for him before I saw the documentaries so respectfully withdrew that comic page.<br /><br />
'''???:''' does your father hate black people.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Not necessarily but it’s just how my father just how my father that does not reflect in any way that’s how he felt (annoying ass noise in the background)<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Man that racist.<br /><br />
'''??? :''' Hey Chris I so the ahh saw the Sonichu and Rosechu love sack that you put up and I thought if was pretty cool for (you adult friends?) I just had a question though: do you have any plans in the comic to have romance between you and one of the hedgehogs I mean-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Yelling) No no no<br /><br />
'''???:''' -we would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' I mean is was just wondering because there are fans how would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Now- now that you answered the his question my kind of relates to his what are your thoughts on inter racial breeding and marriages?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would not agree of disagree with them but in my personal preference I would fell- I would feel more comfortable in having a full relationship with a white woman but I am willing- am still willing to be friends and acquaintances and give and have respect for the black women as well.<br /><br />
'''???:''' What about Asians like Japanese?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I’m ok with them as well (yelling) a once.<br /><br />
'''???:''' So would you get married with a Japanese woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hhhmmmm I would have, yes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> but I’m giving Julie to opportunity here.<br /><br />
'''Clyde:''' Julie’s a lucky woman.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris, I was just wondering, is Silvana gonna become one of the good guys, like- like Black Sonichu did before?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There’s a possibility but I have not given that a co- I have not confirmed that yet.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Uh, is she gonna lose the male sexual parts and become a full-fledged woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhhmmm possibly but I haven’t given that- I haven't given that thought either.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Also um I was reading (?Phillip’s?) question, Chris what did you want to be when you were little?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don’t remember, I do not remember. I’m just making it as I go basically.<br /><br />
'''???:''' is there ever gonna be like uh, an end to your sonichu series like a finale?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hmmmm I don’t know, probably would not.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Oh so it keeps going and going?<br /><br />
???: You ever consider making comic about the history of CWCville?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhmmmm an episode dedicated towards that possibility.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris are you going to keep the name changes that you made or are you going back to the original names?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahhh ya I’m keeping the name changes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' But you know umm Nintendo was umm, y'know, they sent you a letter you never really talk about it further.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but at least- at least- the hel- they use to benefit me for the fact that uh allowed me to fix noting in that sense so I couldn’t be sued by such people in that sense.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 50 min)'''<br /><br />
<br />
(scattered reactions)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So the name changes were good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So uh, Chris I was wondering if uh Mary- Mary Lee Walsh Or I guess the new name: Ryam Sla- I don't know-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Sla-weel.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Slaweel, thank you. Uhm, if she were to use her magic to curse Rosechu with a penis, would Soni- what- wou- would that test the relationship between Sonichu and her? While they were fighting the battle to have it removed, I'm just curious.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... Firstly uh, she does not- she does not have the power ch- to do that.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I just thought you know, remember you did the story about 4-cent-garbage and drawing all the- the picture and-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah you what, that's one- that's one thing: drawing them, but not actually putting them on the character.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Cause I think that would be like an epic story though, like to actually have a quest-<br /><br />
Fan: I'll second that.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -to go to have that penis removed from Rosechu. I mean it's a test of romance between her and Sonichu.<br /><br />
(muttering)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And when that prevails and the penis is removed and everybody- everybody lives happily ever after. Y'know that would be awesome.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnnnnnh, I dunno I have to- I dunno I have to think about that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It is a really good idea. I like it.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I do too.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah, that's good.<br /><br />
Other fan: It could show just how much Rosechu means to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I'll- I'll consider it but I'm not making any promises.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' We understand.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(several talking at once)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -decided on that subject?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm working on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' If you actually decide to go forward with that story? Do you think maybe- maybe you could give her a talking penis?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!!!<br /><br />
(laughter from various people)<br /><br />
(unintelligible responses)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ok, I think- I think we've talked enough about that one guys.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I have a question that doesn't involve penises.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Anyway, my question is since we've been hearing lot of vicious lies and slander about this, could you confirm exactly why you've been fired from your job at Wendy's Chris? Cause we've been hearing all sorts of- of crazy things and we wanna know the truth.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmmmmmm... well, firstly, what have you heard?<br /><br />
'''Other guy:'''Well we heard that uh you... we've heard so many things like you helped a small child and you did a Donald Duck impersonation and you scared the child.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... also that- also that is correct but I did not scare the child. The child was tired, I was only trying ta- I was only trying to make the child feel better. That's a little amusement. But I did not make the child cry, the child was already- was just tired.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' So you didn't help them cut their food and... yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I did help them- help them get their food to- by giving them uhh, by giving them bags and a top for their baked potato boat.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris, when will um, the pictures of Zapina, appear on the um, 18 plus page?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that was a deleted scene! That was a deleted scene.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Why was it deleted?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basically, hhh... y'c- y'cant' really have it if you don't have Rosechu working to take the- working to take the pictures of herself up in the bathroom. Cause like can't have one without the other.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaahhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I don't know if this is a good question but there's something I wonder about that- we kind of have this DVD you made and... y'know, we never unfortunately got... but I'm curious um... do you ever plan to release it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I'd pay money for that, I think everyone else here would probably pay money for it too.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Indeed.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (breaking up) I wanna ask a question.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I hear it's also on YouTube.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris do you know that you've influenced the rap/hip hop community?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmh... uh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I just wanted to mention that because I saw some YouTube videos and it- and- and from some underground hip hop artists such as Immortal Technique and they've sampled some of your voice audio complaining about your struggles with uhm... with the school board, with the security guards and they were- they felt so empowered that they actually took those words and mad'em into a very powerful rap song. How does that- how is your reaction to that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhhhh... basically I have not watched those videos so... I don't have an opinion.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I will provide you a link to that, hold on a moment.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh that's ok, actually I uh, did sample one. The one where they basically played the parody from "Can't touch this".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, no, trust me it's waaay more serious than that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I still haven't heard of- heard of what you're talking about.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Nevermind.<br /><br />
(rustling and moving noises)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do an impression of MC Hammer?<br /><br />
(more clicking and rustling)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Can't touch this do do do doo do dooo Can't touch this! Do do do dooo do do do... can't touch this.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' That was- heheheh.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Awesome.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you- can you do Dr. Nick Riviera from the Simpsons?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> HIIII EVERYBODY!<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hello Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hi Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hi Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that should say Dr. Nick cause that's who I'm imitatin'.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''???:''' That uh-<br /><br />
'''???:''' HELLOOO EV'RYBODY!!!!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well that-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hi Dr. Nick!<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Thank you, I love the Simpsons.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do... Peter from Family Guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhenhenhenh... Hey Lois! Look at me! I'm just (unclear) you nose, and I'm eatin' your nose.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh that's dead on.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Oh would you- Omicron's been interested in tis- would you actually make a documentary like- like your other DVD but make your daily life?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... I'm... yeah I might but uh... I'm not su- I'm not sure bout it at the moment.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaaaaaaanh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris can you do Mario? You know from Super Mario?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hay paisano! How you doin' mistah hedgehog!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's very good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then Sonic- then Sonic would say "what?!?"<br /><br />
(giggling)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris do you have any plans to make a video of yourself taking a dump on a Hexbox?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No! That's gross.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Yeah that was pretty sick right there.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Let's ban him.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's bad enough I cut in half with an axe.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> and one of the elevator jokes...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Oh we remember that, that was a classic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And I earned a trophy for that.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmm...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Yeah, I remember that, it was destroying a Hexbox by cutting it in half if I remember...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' If I were to draw nude Zapina fanart, uhm, would you put them on the site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... uhh, your- you uh- free to draw them at your- at your own- own preference, but I will not be- I will not put it on the website because- cause- because I will not want to break any laws of having underage portrayals- portrayals of underage nudity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Isn't Dot a child?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry... what?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dot, from Animaniacs.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' So-uh- uhm- I think I looked up somewhere that um, drawings do not count, they're just lines on paper not like real pictures that are horrible.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah I believe-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Draw-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (cut off)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Those illustrations do not count as child pornography. Because with drawing it's art- it's artistic merit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Welll... I dunno, I guess it depends I have to- but- y'know you could do the drawing and I'll think- I'll consider it.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, would it be possible to get any pictures of Sonichu having anal sex with Rosechu?<br /><br />
(pause... thumps and feedback)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm considering that but...<br /><br />
'''Accented woman''' Who keeps letting this person in? You are very offensive.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -and and, if you draw those, do you think that Rosechu would actually clean Sonichu's penis off with her mouth (laugh) w-when they're done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nah, no, I don't think so, I think- I think- I think it would be unh- yeah w-wash it off with a washcloth.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Do you think in, at that point then they would sell the washcloth on EBay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!<br /><br />
(people talking over each other)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, no, no more party humor, all right?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah alright, okay<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Unrelated to party humor, I want to ask that in your Springbreak uhh Issue of Sonichu you had an introduction of a, of new character, the [[Yawning Squirtle|squirtle]] and I wanna ask<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:''' (interrupting)</span> No, that's, no, no, no, that's not just a character, I was, I was not introducing a new character, I was just doing like a poster thing for a bubble speak under one, I thought I just draw some water type pokemon un-in there<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I understand but the thing is there is huge cult following for that character and I strongly suggest that you should capalize on that and, and make him to a main character<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eh... No, I don't think so<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's just sleeping Squirtle work waking up<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, people just thought he was really cute and yawning Squirtle, I don't know, I heard someone say, man wouldn't it be great if he would be that [[Autistic|dopey]] sidekick that he'd come and they'd be like, like, he'd come in and say something silly after someone did something and they would be like Squirtle!<br /><br />
People laughing and talking over each other<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Ehm...<br /><br />
???: Yo, it makes you *unintelligible* (Chris and someone talk over another)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yes Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I'm asking you about... Hm... Never mind, I lost my train of thought. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's okay. These guys made me lose a train of thought as well. Doesn't multiple inputs.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yes, kinda lotta control here. I may have to... never mind<br /><br />
Silence<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I never lose my train of thought because I have a GPS tracking system on it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, that was a good joke. (chuckle)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, could you tell us a joke right now. Just any joke.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay, here is a fuck - here is a funny ...here is a funny mind scream. Funny rhyme scheme - not to be taken literally:<br /><br />
On your Game Boy Advance SP<br /><br />
create cher ME<br /><br />
den play da WII<br /><br />
with your PSP<br /><br />
hooked to your PS3<br /><br />
cause it's fun<br /><br />
see?<br /><br />
And never ff, and never play a [[Hex Box]] 360<br /><br />
Because it's stupid and you're not a dummy (in childlike voice)<br /><br />
Mock laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Is that something you made up?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I made that up<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Chris, Chris, can I write that down and tribute to quote you that? Oh man, that's good<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) So you mean to type it up and you quote me on the rhyme scheme?<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Yeah, I'd like that. I've been thinking about making a quote book like a mini Chris quote book like something you could open and have a cool line to say when you're on a party and you're like right things<br /><br />
People talking over Chris and Alucard<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, well I'm typing it up for Alucard, so...<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Thank you<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span>Chris, can we hear one more?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Here is an [[Christian's sex joke|adult joke]] I once come up<br /><br />
'''Fan''': This is going to be good!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There was this married couple, Bob and Jane, and they have been looking forward to having children. So, one night, Bob comes home from work, and Jane says, "Hi, you had a good day, dear?" And he says, "Nah, I felt alone, darling" And she said, "Well, it's okay, why don't we go upstairs, and we'll have some Breakfast." "Breakfast, at Nine p.m.?" And she says, "Sure, you bring the MILK, and I'll get an EGG."<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yo, I heard that before, man<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then later, they had a boy and a girl, Junior Bacon and Orange Juice. All Part of a Balanced Breakfast.<br /><br />
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif]]<br /><br />
Perplexed silence<br />
<br />
'''Fan''': Hey, Chris, how do you solve a Mexican tank?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Stand in front of it?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': No, man, shoot the guys pushing at it<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fans''': Oh that's a good one<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' I got one<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get a bunch of [[Niggos|blacks]] in a car?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Throw some chicken in.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get them out of the car?<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Job application<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What do you call a beach of black people buried up to their necks?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Afro-turf.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I came up with one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what's the difference between a black man and a pizza?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': A pizza can feed a family of four.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': How do you stop black people from jumping on a bed?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, enough racist jokes.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''':Put velcro on the ceiling.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enough, enough black jokes.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, uh Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Sorry<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I showed by friend that over 18 site, and he said, that he um, he um, you know he, he masturbated to it. Does that make you feel (interrupted)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's good, that's basically the reaction I would be going for. Among the male ca... among the male population, being attracted to the women.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But those are your drawings, it's like, I think he's gay now. I mean, you're a guy and you drew those.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm drawing, I'm drawing female characters.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yah, but it's drawn by you and you're, like, I don't know. It's kind of awkward for me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris, I actually need to thank you, the pictures on that site, it looked like the camera was inside Sonichu's penis when Rosechu was giving him a blowjob. That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. I've always wanted to have a camera in my penis so that I could see that if I ever got a blowjob, that would be awesome, I just wanted to say thank you very much for that perspective. It's the first time I've ever seen it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': There's a question here on the site, oh sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, well I see it... no I don't basically masturbate to my own drawings.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But you're okay if other people do, right? Even guys?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You're okay if other people, you know, masturbate to your drawings? Even if they're guys, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If the guys are masturbating to the female drawings, then yes, that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I just thought it was kind of awkward, but maybe I'm seeing it a different way.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I doubt that, uh, having a whole bunch of drawings of naked female characters can be misinterpreted as something else.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': I want to ask you a question.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': One time, a friend and I were looking at porn together, and we masturbated together, but the porn was straight, ordinary porn. Is this gay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I'm sorry, where you looking at naked women?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Yes, but we were in the same room, masturbating.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, if you both were thinking about the naked women you were looking at, then I would definitely say you both are straight, cuss you're not thinking about each other, you're thinking about the women.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Right. <br /><br />
'''Fan''': Would you do that with someone?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': I'm relieved.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Man, nigger you gay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Shut up. Would you do that with someone? Like a guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Nah, I'm straight dog.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I'd, yeah I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Omnicron has a question on here, on the side here.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You see it, or?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. That's not straight.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what about the earlier question.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, the one before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, which one before? Oh, you mean...<br /><br />
(All talk at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, what do you think about.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wait, wait let him answer.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Let him answer that one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was gonna rephrase it but okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'd say it would depend on your interpretation, what is adultery to you?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But, you know, isn't the Bible only supposed to be interpreted, it's the word of God, you're not really supposed to interpret it any other way.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': It is what it is.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's in English.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh, I have no comment.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, that's what my, uh, you know I was talking about my mom saw those drawings. I mean, not the drawings, the posters, the playboy posters and that's basically what she got bad about. She said I was committing adultery.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah okay, if you don't want to talk about it, fine.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, hmmm, I think you shou, I think you should, uh, when you, I think I can see where this could be interpreted one way or another, it depends on how you look at the woman. I mean, alright, you're looking at the, uh woman, you might be imaginin' her naked, but, I mean, you would respe, I mean, you would, you would still respect, I mean, if you were still respecting that woman, you would appreciate her more for like who she was aside or in addition to the (something), that's not as bad as just, as just only doing it for the appearance.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's why, uh, that's why the playboy magazines, they give you the introductions of the women. It's like letting you know who they are (unintelligible).<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, but there weren't any, uh, descriptions under the, yeah never mind.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Thank you for the clarification Chris.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris, do you love America?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm patriotic.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's good. I was wondering if you could sing the national anthem for us?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [[Wikipedia:My Country, 'Tis of Thee| My country tis' of thee. Sweet land of liberty. Of thee, of thee I sing.]] I don't remember the rest.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Lands where my fathers died.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Land of the pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
(Fans all start singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Stop it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey I'll, I'll tell y'all a funny joke that's kind of patriotic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, you got this, you got this funny, you got this funny Mexican guy, and he just, he just come back home to Meh-he-co after an American visit. He's like (high pitched voice) Oh the people there are so very friendly. I mean, I go to the basketball game. I sit in the back row. I sit in the back row. And then, and then, and then all of, and then all of the sudden right before the game started, everyone turned around, put their hands on their chests, and they say, "Oh say can you seeeeee"<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I thought you said no racist jokes?<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': Yeah man, that ain't cool!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was a name, it was a name joke.<br /><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''':...Spanish language<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm kind of offended by that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': That's racist dog. That ain't cool.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': You laugh you support terrorism.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, what?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What'd you say?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What the hell? Who said that?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Forget it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I said, you laugh, you support terrorism.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, he's gone.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Awful Mr. T impression) I pity the fool, who try and misinterpret things, and try and jam new words into my mouth.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You do a good Mr. T<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah you do.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) no jibber jabber.<br /><br />
(Fans laugh)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, did you watch the A-team back in the day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No but, no but, basica, but I have seen Mr. T. And then I also, I also saw when he guest starred in an episode of Alvin and the Chipmunks.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I saw that episode, he helped uh Theodore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Theodore was getting picked on.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, you posted a link here.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well at my [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|Methodist church]], uh, sex before marriage is okay as long as, uh, she and I, we love each other very much and truly.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But that's what they tell you, I'm talking about the word of God.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *Sigh* Okay, I'm getting tired, okay, I'm getting tired here, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, but...<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, sorry, no more of that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, you're right. Please stay Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay. Alright, I'll stay a little while longer.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, if anyone does, if anyone asks anything that makes him feel uncomfortable, I'm gonna kick you out of the room.<br /><br />
(Everyone speaks)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I have a Japanese friend, he's, he's actually 26 and he's never had a girlfriend and we asked him some questions, just joking around one day. And we asked him if his, when he gets married, if his wife wanted to sleep with another man, would he be okay with it, and he actually said yes, as long as she wasn't being forced. Now that kind of bothered us, because us Americans, right, we think that marriage, and you know you're with somebody, they should be faithful, but he doesn't seem to think so, so I wanted to see if you had any advice maybe on what we could do to try and convince him that his viewpoint is wrong.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, hmm, it's not necessarily that the viewpoint is wrong. See, the thing is, what, to, to quote, to make it accepta, to make it like as if you're actually cheating on somebody, cheating on your spouse in the marriage, it's like not telling them, not telling him, not telling him or her about it beforehand, but it's like, you know, you, it's like you tell them beforehand and you get their approval, it's, it's okay, even if they don't want to be part of it. But not telling them, that's definitely like cheating on them.<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that's another thing I would have to think about, cuss got a bit of a, couple of items of destruction(?) that need to be repaired<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I just got, I just talked to that one friend I was talking about who, uh, saw your website, the 18 one, and it turns out he's, he's gay, he's actually gay and he fapped, uh I mean he masturbated to, uh, Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hahaha, your friend's a fag.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': And I think he's...<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out for 15 seconds)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ...about that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I think in case you would definitely want to let him know that you are straight and you don't want that kind of relationship, and maybe, and you know<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I tell him just to get the hell away from your site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm not saying that, but like, uh, you know, you don't want that kind, you don't, I mean that's, that's basically confirmed on that note. So, uh, you want, you still wanna be friends but you don't, but you're not into that kind of thing.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I mean, he was looking at your site, like, the 18 site and he was in like, um,<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Over 18.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': The over 18 site you made. The loveshack. I thought he was just like, you know, masturbating to Rosechu, but it turns out he was attracted to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *sigh* Uhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, I don't think I'll be friends with this guy anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, yeah, then tell him, yeah, to get the hell out of your house and stay away if you don't want to be friends anymore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Seems like you know too many gay friends mister.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh shut up.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris, you know how cologne or perfume, you know, women wear that to try and attract men? Do you think that farts attract gay guys to each other?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Now that's stupid! Not only is that stupid, but it's gross.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Here, I'm gonna take that question and I'm gonna, I'm gonna take that question and spin that into something that's less weird. What would you say the best cologne or whatever a guy could wear to get a girl's attention?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I recommend [[Axe|Axe]] body spray.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh yeah? I think I tried that one time.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': That actually does it for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What scent do you use?<br /><br />
(All speak)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Don't you use ass body spray?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Mmm, love it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Does the Axe effect, does it really exist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Does Axe exist?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, the Axe effect. You know, they say in the commercials spray it and girls will come to you.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) and it works for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Has it worked for you Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, well, yeah, I, yeah I haven't got that working for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I think it's a scam personally.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I mean... I mean, Old Spice is pretty good. I had, I had like a couple of girls go up to me asking me for dates with Old Spice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I actually wore that Orion sent, uhh, still smelling it. So it will work Chris, you just gotta give it time.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Using the Axe.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Cameron but, isn't Axe spray for men?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': No no no no no no no, see, see I said a boyfriend, a boyfriend that I met.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, okay.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah. *laughs*<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Perfect sense.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, silly, silly. I have a question for you Chris, what celebrities have you met?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Well what I'm saying is the Axe effect doesn't work. Okay, sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't actually met any celebrities in person, my real life, unless you count a local radio DJ.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I've met the DJ of my radio station 95.1 and [[Excel Saga|Monica Rial]], and meeting Monica Rial was just a treat.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ahhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was, it was good.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, she's pretty.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Maybe you should go to her and, um, maybe she could be like a contact for voice acting. I mean, you do pretty good imitations.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Do Homer Simpson!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Homer Simpson impression) Oh, look at me! I'm a stupid old person, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp, D'OH!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That was awesome<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Who else can you do Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What other imitations can you do?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, a lot. It depends on if you name it, I might recall, if you name the person or character I'll, if I can recall my memory than I will imitate that person.<br /><br />
<br />
(transcribing end for now at 1:23:00)<br /><br />
<br />
<br />
{{Transcription}}<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 6|Mumble Chat 6]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 8|Mumble Chat 8]]|}}<br />
<br />
==Links==<br />
* [https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBWklfakp0TGdDSkU Download]<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
<br />
[[Christian's sex joke]] - Used during this chat.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_7&diff=163079Mumble 72012-09-27T20:41:48Z<p>Irisviel: </p>
<hr />
<div>'''Mumble 7''' is the seventh of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]], held on 13 [[February 2009]].<br />
<br />
Appears to be the genesis for the "Power" videos in which Chris attempts and fails to prove his [[I AM STRONG|strength]] and [[CWC Fighter|fighting]] [[Challenge For Clyde|skill]], though these would not materialize for several months.<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
* A fan talks to Chris about putting naked posters of girls and pictures of men up in his room up to find out if his friend was a [[homo]] as Chris suggested. He tells Chris that his girlfriend dumped him over the posters and his friend ignored all of them. Chris sees nothing wrong with his advice until Julie tells him that she wouldn't like that. Chris recommends sending an anonymous letter explaining the situation and utterly fails to apologize or show concern.<br />
* Fans point out that Chris shouldn't have to show and prove that he is straight.<br />
* Chris cuts a fan off to let Julie ask a question involving [[pedofork|shota]].<br />
* Fans ask Chris to turn his radio down.<br />
* Chris uses Wal-Mart printer paper & RSVP ballpoint pen to draw, and a 50-pack of Crayola markers to color. Refuses to use color pencils or Photoshop to color, saying he prefers the markers.<br />
* Chris talks about Omicron's redone version of [[Sonichu]], accusing him of plagiarism. Says that the difference between what Omicron is doing and what he is doing is that Sonichu is his. Agrees to let Omicron continue if he credits Chris with the copyright.<br />
* '''Julie is convincing Chris to make videos proving to Clyde how strong he is.''' Chris feels that the [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|dildo breaking video]] proved this. Fans say that Chris's dildo comes apart naturally for cleaning.<br />
* '''A fan recommends making a video showing off his fighting moves to scare Clyde.'''<br />
* Chris is asked why he would use a dildo in proving that he is straight. Chris says that he is straight for crushing it, fans call him a [[homo]] for keeping it.<br />
* Chris [[lie|denies]] [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|using the dildo]], and claims that it's now broken. Fan says it could easily be reassembled. Chris is adamant that it was glued and that it took a lot of strength to pull it apart.<br />
* When asked by Julie, '''Chris admits using super-shears from Cutco to break the dildo glue, claiming to use a lot of strength in the process'''.<br />
* Fans discuss [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]]. Chris insists that it was drawn in protest of [[ED]]. He says it was anonymous, as most women have long brown hair and her eyes were censored.<br />
* Insists that [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:AngelicainGod%27sEyes.JPG the Rule 34 of Angelica Rosechu] is masturbating and enjoying it, and is using her hand to do it.<br />
* Chris thinks Billy Mays is on Home Improvement.<br />
* Chris isn't doing anything on Valentine's Day, as Julie is not there yet.<br />
* Chris discusses the the No-Redheads policy in his [[Love Quest]]. Says that redheads don't attract him unless they are not natural redheads. No piercings or tattoos allowed.<br />
* Chris is OK with blue hair.<br />
* Does a terrible Marge Simpson impersonation.<br />
* Chris impersonates Comic Book Guy and Donald Duck.<br />
* A fan presents the possibility that AIDS was sent by God to kill the [[homos]].<br />
* [[Chris and Religion|Premarital sex being forbidden in Christianity]] is discussed. Chris fumbles for an explanation.<br />
* '''A fan pretending to be black says he believes the government made AIDS to get rid of black people. Chris says that that's the kind of thing a black guy would say'''.<br />
* Premarital sex comes up again. Chris compares it to using porn to practice and learn skills for later.<br />
* The fake black fan calls Chris on his comment from earlier about black guys and AIDS. He makes the excuse that someone else said it first.<br />
* Questions on Sonichu start. Sonichu doesn't wear clothes because it's a comic. Chris isn't sure how [[Blake]] sounds. He might sound black, he might sound like Shadow the Hedgehog. The fake black fan asks why the bad guy has to be black, also mentioning [[Silvana]]. Chris says that he doesn't have to be.<br />
* Chris gets annoyed about the pronunciation of [[Rosechu]] as popularized by the Old Narrator of the [[Audiobooks]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't disagree that the Audiobooks made Sonichu more popular that he ever did'''.<br />
* He doesn't mind fanfics that don't portray Sonichu in a bad light.<br />
* The audio goes low in the main chat and a fan has a private, unrelated conversation for a few minutes.<br />
* Audio comes back as Chris is admitting that the [[B-Manajerk]] was black in real life.<br />
* Chris doesn't watch the news, so doesn't have an opinion on [[Barack Obama|Obama]]. He voted for him because he saw a documentary where he saw more of himself in Obama, namely that he was an outcast at one point.<br />
* A fan says that you should vote based on politics, not personality. Chris says that he is a moderate.<br />
* Chris doesn't know what the financial bailout is. He says that he drew the [[Sonichu 8#The Elevator Gags|racist picture]] of Obama based on his father's joke, before he saw the documentaries that made him vote.<br />
* Chris will not agree or disagree with interracial dating/marriage. He would want a white woman, but he would be [[gal pals|friends]] with others.<br />
* He'd marry an Asian.<br />
* It's not yet known if Silvana will be a good guy or if she will lose her [[pickle|dick]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't know what he wanted to be when he was younger, he's just making it up as he goes along'''.<br />
* '''Chris is keeping the name changes in the comics for legal reasons'''.<br />
* A fan suggests Slaweel cursing Rosechu to have a dick. Chris gets upset before saying that he'll think about it. The fans think it's a great idea. One considers a talking penis for Rosechu. Chris says it's a stupid idea.<br />
* Another fan asks about Chris being sacked from Wendy's. He denies scaring the child with his Donald Duck impersonation, saying that he didn't make him cry.<br />
* Chris might release his DVD one day.<br />
* A fan says that Chris has influenced underground rappers such as Immortal Technique, who has sampled him.<br />
* Chris takes requests. Impersonates MC Hammer, Dr Nick Riviera, Peter from [[Family Guy]], Mario and Sonic, butchering them all and tainting our childhood memories.<br />
* More Sonichu questions. '''Chris won't upload [[Zapina]] [[Rule 34]] because she is underage and Chris is worried about legal ramifications'''. When he is reassured that this would be legal, he says he would consider it. He will also consider Sonichu-Rosechu anal sex. Rosechu would not clean the [[pickle]] with her mouth, she would clean it off with a washcloth. He would not sell the the washcloth on EBay.<br />
* Chris calls a stop to the potty humor displayed throughout the Sonichu questions.<br />
* '''Chris denies that [[Yawning Squirtle]] is a character'''.<br />
* Fans ask for a joke. He recites a dreadful rhyme about Videogame consoles. He then tells his awful [[Christian's sex joke|sex joke]]. Fans start to tell racist jokes about [[niggos|black people]] and Mexicans. Chris calls for a stop to this.<br />
* A fan says that his friend [[mass debating|masturbated]] to the [[rule 34|adult section of Sonichu]] and is now worried that his friend is a [[homo]], as they were drawn by a man. '''Chris says that this is what he intended it for''', and they are drawings of women, so his friend is straight. He doesn't masturbate to his own drawings.<br />
* Chris reassures a fan that [[Mass Debating|masturbating]] in the same room as another man isn't gay as long as both men are thinking of women, but he would not do this.<br />
* Chris offers no comment as to what constitutes adultery.<br />
* Chris says that he is patriotic. Asked to sing the national anthem, he instead mangles a few lines of "My Country, 'Tis of Thee". He then tells a 'patriotic' joke that is insensitive to Mexicans. [[Chris and Hypocrisy|The fans call him on his "no more racist jokes" statement from earlier]].<br />
* Chris does a poor impersonation of Mr T.<br />
* Chris says that if you are married, sleeping with someone else isn't cheating if you have consent from your spouse.<br />
* Chris gives more advice on homos and recommends Axe body spray for attracting girls.<br />
* Chris has not met any celebrities, only local DJs.<br />
* Does impersonations of Homer Simpson and Bender. The two sound identical.<br />
* Chris gives dating advice: Stay calm, polite, friendly and don't let your nerves get the best of you. Say "Hello, how are you" and talk about yourself. '''[[Barbara|His mom]] told him that standing around with a sign makes him look retarded. A female fan cracks up laughing and can't stop'''.<br />
* "Those who can't, teach"<br />
* Chris says he has never even been on a date. Rejects dating suggestions from fans.<br />
* '''Chris was close with Sarah "[[PandaHalo]]" McKenzie, but hasn't heard from her in over two weeks. He heard about the fires and doesn't know if she's still alive. When a fan adds that 108 people were killed in the fires, Chris responds to the entire ordeal with [[Chris and death|"It's OK though, at least I have a good woman who's willing to be by my side at this point"]]'''.<br />
* When pushed, he says he feels remorse for the the victims of the fires and is concerned that [[Sarah Cassandra McKenzie|Panda]] is dead.<br />
* He asserts that he didn't abandon Sarah for [[Julie]].<br />
* '''A fan says that if [[PandaHalo|Sarah]] isn't alive, Chris should take solace that her perfectly barbecued remains fed the survivors. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|SHUT UP!!!]]'''<br />
* Chris says that he cares about Sarah and Julie equally and wouldn't dump Julie as a friend. A fan asks what he will do to the survivors who ate Sarah. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|"SHUT UP!!!"]] and demands that he be booted.<br />
* Fans reassure Chris that Sarah is probably OK.<br />
* Chris does abominable impersonations of Uncle Ruckus from The Boondocks and Hank Hill. '''He sings "Don't Trust Them New [[Niggos|Niggas]] Over There"'''. He also impersonates Meowth and sings the Team Rocket song.<br />
* [[Clyde]] enters. Chris refuses to answer questions and leaves.<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
===Chris proves he is straight===<br />
'''Guy:''' Chris!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all! ''[echoes]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'll be damned.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh, Chris-[gets cut off by another guy]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh you know, can't com- it's uh, can't complain.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' How's construction of the site?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' [unintelligible] so Chris<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I...I need to ask you something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yup?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh... I put those posters, of the... Playboy and everything in my room, and uh, one of my girlfriends saw it, and she got mad at me for looking at other w-... other girls, and she broke up with me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh... I'm sorry to hear that. It could-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, she's calling me a pervert. I-I don't understand this.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Did you... did you ex- did you try to explain to her about situation between you and that guy?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I... I did, and I don't think she understood.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... well, you should try, you should, uh, s-... try, uh, you should try wr-, you should tr-, uh, do you know her email address?<br /><br />
[pause]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So, uh Chris-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' A-also, wait... also, uh, the friend, I was talking about, he, uh, visited, and [typing noises] he, uh, he went into my room, and didn't even notice the posters. He just s-sat in the middle, he didn't s...sit in any uh, part of the room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Huh. Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, uh... so, yeah, I don't know. I mean, my girlfriend broke up with me, called me a pervert, said that I shouldn't be looking at other girls, I mean... I don't know what to do now.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well listen, uh, answer my question, do you have her email address?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Umm... yeah, but she won't... she won't answer me anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm... ok, hmm. Here's what you can do, uh... Do you know your girlfriend's... any of your girlfriend's [[Gal pal|gal-pals]]?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm... well, you should try to... like wr- you should write out... hmm... hmm... here's an idea. S- Write a letter to her and send it via smail mai-, via snail mail, but don't write the return address. On it.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What should I write?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just like, you know, like, they, you know, this is... you know, this is... you, uh, you put your name there, and you, it's, and then you would basically explain the situation between you and that guy, and that's why you had the posters up, well that's why you put the posters up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't really understand what was the point of the posters in the first place?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[sigh]'' it's... ''[sigh]'' if he looks at... if he, if he is very interested, if he is, if he was straight, he would uh, look at the women. Very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But he didn't even notice them. He didn't notice any of the posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, then I guess he is a [[Homos|homo]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' W...well, um, he wasn't looking at anything, not even the guy posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Hmm... He's not blind, surely.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, like, what is he, is he like, uh...I don't know.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I don't know either, man. But, you know at the moment I would suggest you, uh, write the- write the letter to your girlfriend, send the mail, don't write your return address on the envelope, and, uh, mail it to her.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Also my mom saw the posters and she got offended, she's like really religious and st- she said that like, uh, you know, lust is a sin or some shit. Oh, like she said, she's like all against the, the uhh, the like, Playboy in my room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, your- apparently your mom hasn't been [beeps] that open minded that time. So, you know, give her time to reh-cover, she'll uh, she might op- she might open up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I don't think that was a good idea though, I mean, w-why did-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -you suggest it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I was trying to see if he, to, I was trying to s-help you figure out if your uh, if your friend was a homo or not.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I know, but, do you have uh, [Fans talking] Playboy posters in your room?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unclear] I'm very forward.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I have uh, poster of some, of uh, I have a poster in my room of uh, some uh, naked girls I got from adamandeve.com as a bonus.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Then, nobody says anything about it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[clears throat]'' Well, I didn't really have too many oppor- too many people in my room. So, it's kind of like in a hard to notice place.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Um, wondering, um, If you showed anyone, wouldn't they be offended?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe, maybe not, [Fan grunts] it just depends on their point of view.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I wouldn't want the same thing that happened to me to happen to you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I hear you there. Uh, just to so just sound clear... Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie, are you there?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ok, uh, would you be offended if you saw such a poster in my room?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''[breaks up]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, What will, what was that? [Echoes]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie'''</span> Yes I would, kind of.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well that's no problem, I can take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, see that's what I'm talking about, I mean...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, that's why I asked Julie right now, because I respect her. So, because she said that she would, I will take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I've been thinking, um...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you have... [unclear] Chris, I don't think you should look at other woman.[sic] In my opinion.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I see, Julie. Well that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I...I respect that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' She might get jealous, I mean, that's what happened to my...my girlfriend.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, that's fine Julie, I respect your, I respect that. Just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey, can I ask you a question? If uh, he's done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, uh, one more thing, um, you know I've been thinking, uh, I don't really think you need, you know, posters and stuff like,<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' to prove you're straight, I mean, if you're straight, that's all there is to it i-if, am I right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think you're right.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I...I mean, you shouldn't have to prove that you're straight.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> You're right.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I m-mean [line breaks temporarily] Y-you shouldn't have to reassure yours-self. You should just be knowing it, and nothing anybody says, should get very, uh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, it's ve-ah-very-but you see, I have like, I have that [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] in my room, it's just, so that like, you know, for in case I have any-for in case I have any random thoughts, on account really, to tempt me.<br /><br />
''[unintelligible mix of chatter from most participants trying to get their word in]''<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I mean, even if they're random thoughts, even if they're random thoughts, if you know you're ''positive'' about it, you shouldn't have to look at anything to make sure.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, usually.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay. Uh, moving on from all this homosexuality, uh, I have one question, uh- [gets cut off by Chris in the background] ...never mind, [fat douchebag?]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey, ah, let Julie ask a question, let Julie ask her question.<br /><br />
<br />
===7:08 Julie asks about shotacon===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, I was watching you on the Internet yesterday and, what's a shotacon?[slightly cut off]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...I'm sorry, uh-y, I'm sorry, you got cut off, what was that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> What's a sho-[cuts off again]-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...What's a...''short''?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Shot-[cuts off third time, pretty obvious she's saying ''shota'']-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dude, shota.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, shota.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ssshhhh...shota?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, S-H-O-A-T-A [sic].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, it's a word he found online.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, [baby?], yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never heard of that word.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I dunno, if you want to look it up, you can probably find out on an online dictionary...<br /><br />
''[pause, and a weary sigh from someone other than Chris]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'll-I'll take a look. Hang on.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I know some Japanese and I think I've heard that somewhere, like in a magazine or something.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, it's some of that Japanese shit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Probably is. Three moments, I'll look it up.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Okay!<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's radio is audible]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Whoops, that was the wrong one. The wrong bookmark.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' S-H-O-T-A.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I know, I just get the wrong bookmark for...place I wi-for like...dictionary-type website that I have.<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's keyboard taps are audible]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uhhh...Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, now that Julie's done with her question, I also had one.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' He has to find what that means first.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, ''I'm sorry''.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Shit, ah shit, I've just found it on Wikipedia. It's, uh, it's a ma-it's a Japanese name. It's a name of a person. In Japan.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Really.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a Japanese name. I think it's-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh no no, I think you're looking at the wrong thing, it's S- S-H-O-T-A-C-O-N.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> S-H- I mean- O-T-A-C-O-N? Shotacon?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's the same thing, just put C-O-N at the end.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I've read it in a dictionary before, can't remember what it means...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, oh! Okay, here it is, uh..."shotacon, sometimes shortened to shota, is Japanese slang of the phrase 'Shotaro Complex'"...uh..."that describes the attraction to young boys or an individual with such an attraction".<br /><br />
''[Disgusted reactions heard]''<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh my god, what the fuck?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' There's lots of sick people. Y'all are gonna get ricked?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Someone from 4 cent garbage came in and told us to look that up, I didn't-I didn't even want to.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess he's a homo...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Don't worry I banned him already.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Um, Chris, Vivian wants to know if you can like, turn your radio down a bit, it's distracting.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yes, please turn it down.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I thought that was quiet enough, here.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, no, the lady'll probably pick it up<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Alright cool. Merci.<br /><br />
<br />
===10:21 Another fan asks about art supplies===<br />
<br />
'''Another Fan:''' Okay, um, I have a question, um, I like to draw—interrupted by mumbling—I like to draw comics and such, I mean I want to start up a webcomic. What kind of materials do you use?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, like, you mean for drawing?<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well mostly I just use like, uh, paper without lines, like, computer printer paper you can get in, like, Wal-Mart, for an inexpensive price in multiples.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then I use like an RES—RSVP-brand pen with the black ink.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh okay, is it like, um, a gel pen or a ballpoint pen or-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like a ballpoint, it's like a ballpoint pen.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What do you use to color?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I use Crayola brand markers.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would like to—I would—I would—I would recommend getting the Super Tip 50-pack which you can also find at the Wal-Mart.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay. I-[interrupted by someone else on chat]<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's basically-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' At Wal-Mart I usually get the 24-color RoseArts. Those are—those do pretty good too.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhh, Vivian, just so you—just so you know, I'm using the microphone that came with Hey You, Pikachu for Nintendo Sisty-Four [sic].<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, yeah no, no offense, but uh, personally I prefer like, colored pencils and shit cause-[Chris mumbling is heard]-they're like easier to erase. Photoshop [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If you want to use colored pencils that's fine, I'm not, uh, saying that you have to use Crayola markers-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why don't you use colored pencils? They're really good, you should try one on like, at least one page, just try one. One page with just colored pencils.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But um, actually, you can—you can scan your drawings and then color—color them in like, Photoshop or something. [rest of chat murmurs in agreement] That looks really professional, and really good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I prefer using the markers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's just that I-I mean—I mean I've tried—I mean I've colored with colored pencils before, and I just feel best with using markers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I have a question, um, uh, the Hey You Pikachu microphone, how does that work on the, you're using that on your computer? Did you say?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah it's just, yeah, it's like you plug it into uh, into the basic microphone jack.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh, yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Excuse me, I have a nice little Plantronics headset.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Hey Chris can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah, hang on a second, uh... uh, Omicron, that's uh, you're basically, uh, you're basically plagiarizing here. You're even using, uh, parts of my original drawings to, uh, make up your so called real ones and, you're just—you're just parroting—you're just plagiarizing-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's dirty and illegal.<br /><br />
[Unintelligible mumbling]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, you said so yourself, you're being illegal. And plus, and plus I'm-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, isn't combining Sonic with Pikachu the same thing?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, but, but but also, look at this, also I'm looking at this site here, it said, he's claiming the copyright for himself, but he's, but he's not. I mean that's like, but he's, he—he says<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' You need to ban him immediately.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, ban him immediately.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh wait wait wait wait wait...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah maybe you should check-[interrupted by loud noise, probably Chris]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well he said that, he's saying that all of Sonichu material is copyrighted by him, when it's clearly not.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah but you use Sonic and Pikachu, and you copyrighted it-<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' He just offered to give you credit-[interrupted by noisy chatter]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean, I put, I mean, yeah but, I mean, I'm talking about the—the Omnicron [sic] guy here, that's like, just put this link here.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh he offered to give you credit-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes that's the same thing you did.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well no no, he, no-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We decided-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No he's plagiarizing MY Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We just decided [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris it's, it's a parody, kinda like Sonichu is.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but he—yeah, but he's saying, he said—he—on his front page he says, all Sonichu material-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah but he's, he just offered to change it, so are you okay with that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> By changing it to Sonichu X-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, he said he'll give you credit instead of claiming it for himself.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, uh, yeah I would appreciate that, that would be better, yeah, if... he changed that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Alright cool.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Problem solved.<br /><br />
<br />
===15:02 Chris talks about dildos to prove his strength===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes Julie.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you think you could tell everyone about my idea? And, since you're going to do it do you think you could tell everyone so they could look out for it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, your idea... um, oh oh oh, yeah, just basically a video of me standing up to Clyde and showing him how strong I am, doin' a few kicks for the camera or something-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, you should throw some punches, show him what you're made of, you know?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Kick, punch, it's all in the mind ''etc.''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I basically... I pretty much did that when I...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Let him talk, c'mon!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I pretty much did - already proved my strength when I... ripped that... ''dildo'' in half.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Foreign-Sounding Guy:''' Most dildos come apart for cleaning.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' C'mon.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but that thing was screwed together at the seam.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok listen to me...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris...<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' Eh Chris!<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ...could you do a like further test of your strength for me?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''stress sigh'' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I wanna see how strong you are please.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...That's fine, I can do that.<br /><br />
'''Other Fan:''' I mean that's ok, you showed your strength, but you should show her your moves. Like show her, like, what kind of moves you can do.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, let me tell you a story about how this'll work, ok.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' See, my, uh, one of my cousins, uh, this guy at school, kept, y'know, picking on him, calling him gay and stuff, and trying to fight with him, and my cousin told him to sss- y'know, one day, the guy said "Hey man, I'm gonna beat you up" and my cousin said "Look, if I show you some of my moves, I'll prove to you I can kick your ass in a fight" and so my cousin, y'know, he stepped back and, he took, uh, he took Tae Kwon Do, and he did a couple moves, y'know? He just stood there for like five minutes just doing his moves, and, y'know, some punches and kicks and... The guy just backed right off; he didn't even want to talk to him any more. So I think that should work.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> All right, well I'll try that. I'll try that.<br/><br />
'''Guy:''' All right. Sounds good.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br?><br />
'''Fan:''' You try- you always mention about how you're straight but yet in your video about you crushing a dildo, uh, doesn't that kinda like, y'know, not help your cause?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, it proves I'm straight because...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' But you have a dildo.<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I got it free with an order on adameve.com<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' But you ''kept'' it and shit. That ain't cool.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' What I don't... Why were there batteries in...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh yeah Chris, why ''were'' there batteries in it? Why did you keep it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I mean...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it wasn't an easy thing for me to sell, right off the bat, or even to make a profit, so...<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In fact in a way it's a good thing I kept it, cause it allowed me to be able to break it, like I did.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes but why would you keep it?<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why would you keep it?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I woulda saved it for my sweetheart, if she'd wanted it. To use it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Aaaahhh.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But if I were there wouldn't you prefer the real deal?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Some things that metal just can't replace.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Yeah.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I heard that.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' You didn't use it did you?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No I did not.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Did you just throw all the ones you had away?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I only had that one. And there you go, I ri- there you go, I broke it apart.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you just, like, ''take'' it apart, I mean, it did...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' ...seem to come apart, like, screwed on...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I did not take it apart, that thing was glued at the seam. I had to put a lot of strength into breaking it at the middle there.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, but I think, um, showing your moves would be better.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Right.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Clyde would mess with you if you show him you can kick his ass.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey, Chris's a muthafuckin' ''gangsta''!<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Blap blap.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yes, Chris will fuck Clyde's shit up.<br /><br />
(awkward pause)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait, Chris, didn't you say you used a - didn't you say you used scissors to break the dildo?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I pretty much did have to so I could break that ''glued seam''.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, I thought you broke it with your hands.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well I- yeah well I would have but it was dang glued at the seam, so I clipped straight in with the scissors I had.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a pair of Super Shears from [[Cutco]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(feigning interest)'' Huh.<br /><br />
<br />
===19:50 Chris defends his Rule 34===<br />
<br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, let's talk about something else. Uh, Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whenever the announcement of the adult Sonichu page, when I looked at your gallery, very nice stuff, you know, I see a picture of what looks like you with a Sonichu, uh, medallion. Like, and, who's that one girl, exactly?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Who, [[Megan]]?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I thought it was, like, [[Crystal]], cause of the hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, it was - it was originally drawn to be Megan but I censored her eyes to, uh, port- to protect her identity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Mmmmmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''(laughing)'' That's stupid! (?) That's so silly.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I drew that after I found the ED page in November.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you say that?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In protest against it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thought you were going to get rid of it anyway.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I tore up the original drawing, I, in- into squares, and I put in in an envelope.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you upload it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you do that shit? Like, and...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I understand Rosechu, but, like y'know, why, like, something that's from real life. That's the problem (?)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's not necessarily from real life, it depends on you inter- it depends on your interpretation, I mean it's hardly- I mean, '''most women have long brown hair, and the eyes are censored''', so...<br/><br />
(laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''Most'' women?!?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I remember in that one video you were saying it was Megan.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because it broke, because it end up, because it the end it broke up my friend - broke up my friendship eve, my uh, friendship with Megan.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um, can I ask you a question? In the third picture, with [[Angelica Rosechu]], what is... what's happening, is... God... doing...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nope. She's masturbating. And she's enjoying it.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But she has no hands there. How's she doing it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' She's ''enjoying'' it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But she does... She does...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah but how's she doing it? She doesn't have her hands there.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> She does have her hands, she's... ''(stress sigh)'' She's... like most women would be able to do the same thing.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thing it's the angle, Julie. I think it's the angle you were looking at it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah plus uh, the picture wasn't, uh, very - wasn't as clear as, like, you know, I would have liked to have had it, uh, I mean, I had that file for a while, and it...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah some of those are kinda blurry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, some deg- some degraded.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ? a good question, have you drawn anything... of... have you drawn anything like that with me? Cause I would actually like to see, if you did. If so, could you, and let me see? I, uh, sorry, that's very rude to ask.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm sorry, let me answer this guy. Yeah, well, I made a retraction video later saying that I- I disowned that address.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ah, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just after that guy hacked into it and changed to it to suck. And as such.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hang on, I'm gonna take a look at that... My Youtube...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I like this song.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What song?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' The song that's playing in the background of, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what do you think of, uh, what do you think of that guy who advertises products, Billy Mays? What do you think of him?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... Billy... Oh! Yeah he's an ok guy, I watched him on Home Improvement.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Billy Mays?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, that was another guy on Home Improvement, Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No that was the same guy. That was the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Really?!? Let's look up. IMDB, go. ''(sound of typing)''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Believe me, it's the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, I really enjoyed your, um, adult, uh, section of the site.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... okey dokey, very good. Aaahh, trying to figure out how to update the link on this thing here. Oh, maybe under here. Oh there it is, thank God (?), update right now.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(singing)'' You spin me right round baby, right round...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (joining in) Like a record baby, right round round round<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's a classic, I can't help in man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There you are, updated. It's finally fixed.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Actually that was Richard Karn on Home Improvement, not Billy Mays.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well my mistake, I mean the guy had the beard and uhh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh yeah I can understand.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And the voice sounds- and the voice sounds the same...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah. They sound the same.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There's a matter of interpretation apparently I misinterpreted so I will admit that I was wrong.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah see we all make mistakes, don't be too hard on yourself.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unintelligible babble or singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you gotten any fan art submissions or notable? For the uh- webpage?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I got one today... It's like mostly a drawing of that uh that uh- of the fan herself.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -got in the snail mail today.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -Sunday.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hmmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What are you doing for this Valentine's day Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhm... I'm sorry, what was that question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What will you be doing this year on Valentine's day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm depends...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ahhh, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm.<br /><br />
Fan: Surely a man of such magnitude as yourself are going to be doing something important, aren't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Magnitude? Way to choose the words buddy.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Vocabulary talent.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, cause I don't have Julie over here yet.<br /><br />
(Reactions of OHs and AHs)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If she was here...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible) -play games.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Or we could just uh... talk.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Ehehehehe. Maybe... uh... why no redheads?<br /><br />
'''Other Woman:''' Yeah?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I was trying to think about that when the other guy asked that question. Uh... I was trying to think up that unh... mmmm... Uhhhh, redheads just don't be very- tract me so much.<br /><br />
Several: Uh, ah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's- it's- a- pi- a possibility that they're dyed.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmmmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But yeah y'know natural redheads enh, yeah, just don't really turn me on as much.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I see...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you thought about girls with um, highlights?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... (pause) aaahhhh... what turns me on hhh- (inhales) (pause) obviously the women.<br /><br />
'''Man:''' Gotta have the women. (?)<br /><br />
'''Guy''': What about piercings or tattoo?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, neither of those.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhhh-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris! How bout like non-orange hair, not like... no, never mind. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... oh... okay... hmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait Chris! How do you feel about blue hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Blue hair's okay, otherwise I wouldna- Otherwise I wouldn't've liked Sailor Mercury.<br /><br />
'''British? guy:''' That is true, she does have blue hair.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' She's a very fine character. There is no way to deny it.<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Blue hair is OFF DA HOOK!!!<br/><br />
<br />
===28:35 Chris impersonates various cartoon characters===<br />
<br />
'''British??? guy:''' Doesn't Marge Simpson have blue hair as well?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (in some kind of insane voice) Oh yeah! Marge Simpson has blue hair and it's as tall as the Empire State building!!!<br /><br />
(Some HMMs UHs and UMs follow)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yo Chris!! Can you do some impersonations for us?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Oh we'd love to hear that!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just did Marge Simpson.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah you're really talented.<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(Several people talking at once)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> -they're really good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Do another SimpsonsChris, how about Comic Book Guy?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Mmmmhmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I'm very indeed. Oh aren't we all promiscuous and whatnot. I like Batman and Robin, oh look! Stan Marsh has come into the thing again - I forget that guy's name, that guy who did the Marvel comics.<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Stan Lee. (Pause) Chris do your Donald Duck impression.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Everybody have fun (incoherent and scary quacking)<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris you should work for Disney.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's good Chris.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Have you ever considered being a voice actor?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Errrrrp... possibly, I'm not sure.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (incoherent, cut off by Chris)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent... another cartoon voice)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris, you're a Christian, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I was just wondering-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahm actu-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -do you just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm actually a Methodist church.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome, I was just wondering: Do you think AIDS was sent by god to kill the homos or do you think that it's just an accident or something man-made?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thou- the thought never occurred to me... thought never occurred to me.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' can you do an impression of Arnold Schwarzenegger?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hold- the question...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Let Chris answer the question.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thought- the thought never occurred to me about what you just said about the AIDS there mmmm... but y'know, it's a possibility and I will not agree nor disagree with it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I was just wondering I mean, I've had that discussion with some of my Christian friends. I just wanted to get your opinion, thank you.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmhhh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think (clears throat) I think Omicron has a point and you did tell me you went to a methodist church didn't you? So that's-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well th- well my Methodist church is uh more loose on- is not as strict on uh- on uh sex.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris I don't know- I don't know that much about religion in the States but I don't think there is a looser Meth- Methodist church. God makes the rules Omicron says.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, hmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well, you know personally I think that the government made AIDS to kill off all the brothers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whoa, whoa... That's what the blacks always say.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. (pause) I'm going to agree, that sounds like something that uh... well, a black guy would say.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So your church is kinda of uh- they let you do- their kinda loose on the whole moral restrictions?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... (pause) uhhh... that's... what's the question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Your church they- you said they're kind of more uh- y'know they're less strict on the whole moral thing, like, as far as sexuality goes? Right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -ah basically.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But y'know, uhh, I thought you're supposed to listen to the Bible or whatever not, y'know, not necessarily- no, never mind.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (interrupts)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, there's also a uh, there's also a- think about this uh, if you uh- if you- if you were a think uh- you have to find for yourself a good meaning behind uh- good meaning behind watching pornography to uh- like teach how it- how to do this and that when you actually get around to doing it...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's all ???<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's all's considered education for yourself.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' How is that realistic at all?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, it's uh- not a really good thing to learn from, trust me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It can be done before marriage as well as long as me and my sweetheart really love each other very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But not in Christianity.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But all I'm saying is y'know, porn is completely, completely unre- unrealistic I mean you can't really learn anything from it.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It gives- it gives you enough ideas.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unclear)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (incoherent) porn.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' When you actually have sex, it's nothing like porn.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe not like you, you not gonna do it-<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' You can't do it immediately- immediately anal sex cause most women are not very happy with anal sex and also...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay, shut up<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' -and also weird-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Shut up.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Yes.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And... that wasn't cool, like...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That was uncalled for...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, like, suthin' a BLACK MAN would say...<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' That's racist man...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, somebody said it on here first before I did.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Does that make it ok?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, I think he's trying to make it clear that- I dunno.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I typically agree with that guy.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So nothing g- it doesn't make it ok.<br /><br />
(incoherent)<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling) I wi- I'm sorry, I take it back.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(unclear)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Guys can we get back to Sonichu, Please?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah this is getting ridiculous.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unclear) -Sonichu actually.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Anyway, my question is that: why does Sonichu not wear clothes while Rosechu and the other Rosechus do wear clothes? And underwear?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Aaaaaaaaaamp... It's like uh- it's basically a cartoon and it doesn't really matter, it's like... mm... think about this: Most cartoon characters wear at least one article of clothing. At least one article. And uh- it's like Yogi Bear who just wears a necktie and a hat.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 35.14)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Other Guy:''' I think it would be cool if all the Sonichus and Rosechus got together and they and- they all formed a big team and they had special uniforms or something, kinda like the X-men.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Or Power Rangers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh yeah, I don't do- I don't do well- I'm not in- no uniforms. It's a uniform and other Sonichus and Rosechus.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'm just wondering if you'd do another impression: What does Blachu sound like? Uh, Black Sonichu? Or Blake?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eeeeuuunh... Eh... ahhhh...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Can you imitate it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... I'm not sure... uhhhhm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Like does he sound black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Possibly, but I'm not certain. I'm not leaning towards it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I'd like to hear it, but if you don't want...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just never- I just never really thought about that. I'd say that he possibly sounds similar to uh, y'know Shadow the hedgehog. But he could possibly sound, black. He could. Don't quote me on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' All right, I was just wondering if you'd do his voice but...<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Hey why does the BAD guy gotta be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never said the bad guy "has to" be black. (pause) I mean, look at the- the range of villanies, I mean there's black and whites and uh... male females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I noticed that uh- Silvana's also... black lookin'.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just decided to color her black because she was born- she came from outer space from a black egg, which was the- which came out of the rainbow.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah, I was also wonderin' about that like-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I- I- I-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' If Silvana came out of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes it's-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Why would she be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' I mean like black ain't part of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like the black sheep of the family. Y'know you put all the colors together and it does become black.<br /><br />
(unintelligible reactions)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -like a brownish-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) is a (unintelligible) color.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Maybe it's because she's from space and there's not a lot of light in space and it's dark or something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah that- a uh yeah- that's one of the-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hmmm.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhm, did you look at the link of my friend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, ummmm...<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Yeah, since you love blue hair.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh- no I haven't looked at it and I don't wanna make Julie feel jealous if I did- if I went and did.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Julie would mind.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhhh...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You look at pornography don't you?<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' (mumble)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, that- that was two syllables "Rose-chu". You don't- don't add- don't say the "e" it's just "Rosechu".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah you went over this last chat.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>(I don't know, it sounds like "narrator")<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sounds like he says "narrator" again)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh... I was just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, well, obviously the uh- the narrator who did those audio books was incorrect. Specially since I never gave that person the approval to do the audiobooks.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think it's just a fan project and I think he-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' and I think he might have one of the West coast dialects. I know that the South they say y'all but over here-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well obviously he lied-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -different. I'd be proud if they made one of my projects into an audiobook though. That means that there are a lot of fans out there that really like it.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Ay.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' They're not selling to try and make any money off it. They're not trying to rip you off. They always made sure- they always narrate the first page by saying "Christian Weston Chandler" so they're not trying to cheat you or anything.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' The people know you're making it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I- I hear that. I just, apparently they misin- misinterpreted the (audio breaks up) name Rosechu. Or mispronounced it. Misinterpreted, mispronounce- fairly the same thing in that situation... possibly. To answer that question... possibly.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uh, Vivian said that the audiobooks made Sonichu way popular that- than you could ever ever do on your own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I will not disagree with the statement. And I appreciate her help.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris. Would you be offended if a fan wrote a fanfiction about Sonichu?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Faaanfiction... if it's- if it's not demeaning or makes them look stupid. Then it's fine- it's fine. (pause) Like I did mind when, shoot, what's his name? That guy... uhhhh... that guy that the uhhhh... did the animations, on his computer.<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' You did mind or you didn't?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Animations???<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think I know what he's talking about. Are you talking about the um...<br /><br />
<br />
(background noise begins)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' Well the original play was a Greek play. Where they're all y'know... Greeks... and crazy stuff happens and they're all runnin' around in togas. So if you ever wanna see the movie "A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum" it was a classic and it had some real classic people from the 50s and 60s in it. Kinda like "It's a MAD MAD MAD MAD World". Sort of a classic old school movie from funny old school world. First color movie type thing. But that'll be a high school play. You'll wanna see that. You might actually enjoy it. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
(inaudible response)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' You never know that might be fun to do. Well I guess that wouldn't work on the weekend then... you gotta...<br /><br />
<br />
'''(FOR THOSE OF YOU WONDERING WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON, IT APPEARS THAT THERE WAS SOME TECHNICAL PROBLEM THAT CAUSED ANOTHER MUMBLE CHANNEL TO BE RECORDED WHILE THE CONVERSATION WITH CHRIS BECAME BARELY AUDIBLE BACKGROUND NOISE. INSTEAD ALL THAT CAN BE HEARD IS SOME BUTTFACE YAMMERING ABOUT FILMS AND TELEVISION SHOWS. I'M NOT GOING TO KEEP TRANSCRIBING IT. CHRIS IS STILL TALKING AND ANSWERING QUESTIONS, BUT NOTHING CAN BE UNDERSTOOD OVER THESE GUYS.)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''(AT 42.56 THE AUDIO SUDDENLY RESUMES NORMALLY)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Unknown person:''' Uh you-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I uh- noticed he's another BLACK villain.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah in real life he was black. Without meaning any offense to the uh- black guy in general, cause you've noticed, among the Jerkops there's uh- we got black's and white's, males and females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(several people jump in at once)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) -you've never drawn a female officer before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well y'know uhhh... uhhh, comic book number 7, near the end. Near the end of the time travel episode. Uhh, I have no opinion about what Obama's doing cause I don't watch the news.<br /><br />
Accented woman: But you voted for him, didn't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes I voted for him because I saw myself in him when I com- when I saw both the documentaries and downloaded them for the Playstation Network between Obama and McCain. I mean voted for a person I saw more of myself of-<br /><br />
Accented woman: You usually vote for someone based on their political leanings, not how you view them. As I were Republican, I voted for John McCain. Not because I liked him but because I- he had the same political views as me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basi- basically I'm a moderate.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh, I see. Um, I was wondering. I was reading opinions: do you agree with his financial bailouts?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm, I don't even know what it is. So I can't disagree or agree.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Well, to make it short um, it's about uh- the government- President Obama is planning to uh- a new one- (cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You got cut off there.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uhh, ok, we lost him.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yo, Chris, uh, do you, you didn't just vote for Obama cause he was black, did you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I did not vote for him because he was black. I voted for him cause I saw myse- because I saw myself in him. In like, similar lifestyles. And I saw that he was a good man, I mean after all, com- I saw- I saw I watched both of the A&E documentaries, before I can- before I knew who I would vote for.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 45.29)'''<br /><br />
<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris:, Chris what did you see in him that you say in your self?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Like for one thing we were like outcasts, at least one point in our lives.<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Wait, wait hold up earlier you said that you thought he would probably paint the white house black.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh oh that was my father’s joke he said that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Is your father a racist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but you see I drew that for him before I saw the documentaries so respectfully withdrew that comic page.<br /><br />
'''???:''' does your father hate black people.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Not necessarily but it’s just how my father just how my father that does not reflect in any way that’s how he felt (annoying ass noise in the background)<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Man that racist.<br /><br />
'''??? :''' Hey Chris I so the ahh saw the Sonichu and Rosechu love sack that you put up and I thought if was pretty cool for (you adult friends?) I just had a question though: do you have any plans in the comic to have romance between you and one of the hedgehogs I mean-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Yelling) No no no<br /><br />
'''???:''' -we would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' I mean is was just wondering because there are fans how would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Now- now that you answered the his question my kind of relates to his what are your thoughts on inter racial breeding and marriages?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would not agree of disagree with them but in my personal preference I would fell- I would feel more comfortable in having a full relationship with a white woman but I am willing- am still willing to be friends and acquaintances and give and have respect for the black women as well.<br /><br />
'''???:''' What about Asians like Japanese?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I’m ok with them as well (yelling) a once.<br /><br />
'''???:''' So would you get married with a Japanese woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hhhmmmm I would have, yes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> but I’m giving Julie to opportunity here.<br /><br />
'''Clyde:''' Julie’s a lucky woman.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris, I was just wondering, is Silvana gonna become one of the good guys, like- like Black Sonichu did before?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There’s a possibility but I have not given that a co- I have not confirmed that yet.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Uh, is she gonna lose the male sexual parts and become a full-fledged woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhhmmm possibly but I haven’t given that- I haven't given that thought either.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Also um I was reading (?Phillip’s?) question, Chris what did you want to be when you were little?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don’t remember, I do not remember. I’m just making it as I go basically.<br /><br />
'''???:''' is there ever gonna be like uh, an end to your sonichu series like a finale?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hmmmm I don’t know, probably would not.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Oh so it keeps going and going?<br /><br />
???: You ever consider making comic about the history of CWCville?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhmmmm an episode dedicated towards that possibility.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris are you going to keep the name changes that you made or are you going back to the original names?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahhh ya I’m keeping the name changes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' But you know umm Nintendo was umm, y'know, they sent you a letter you never really talk about it further.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but at least- at least- the hel- they use to benefit me for the fact that uh allowed me to fix noting in that sense so I couldn’t be sued by such people in that sense.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 50 min)'''<br /><br />
<br />
(scattered reactions)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So the name changes were good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So uh, Chris I was wondering if uh Mary- Mary Lee Walsh Or I guess the new name: Ryam Sla- I don't know-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Sla-weel.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Slaweel, thank you. Uhm, if she were to use her magic to curse Rosechu with a penis, would Soni- what- wou- would that test the relationship between Sonichu and her? While they were fighting the battle to have it removed, I'm just curious.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... Firstly uh, she does not- she does not have the power ch- to do that.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I just thought you know, remember you did the story about 4-cent-garbage and drawing all the- the picture and-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah you what, that's one- that's one thing: drawing them, but not actually putting them on the character.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Cause I think that would be like an epic story though, like to actually have a quest-<br /><br />
Fan: I'll second that.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -to go to have that penis removed from Rosechu. I mean it's a test of romance between her and Sonichu.<br /><br />
(muttering)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And when that prevails and the penis is removed and everybody- everybody lives happily ever after. Y'know that would be awesome.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnnnnnh, I dunno I have to- I dunno I have to think about that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It is a really good idea. I like it.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I do too.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah, that's good.<br /><br />
Other fan: It could show just how much Rosechu means to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I'll- I'll consider it but I'm not making any promises.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' We understand.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(several talking at once)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -decided on that subject?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm working on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' If you actually decide to go forward with that story? Do you think maybe- maybe you could give her a talking penis?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!!!<br /><br />
(laughter from various people)<br /><br />
(unintelligible responses)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ok, I think- I think we've talked enough about that one guys.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I have a question that doesn't involve penises.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Anyway, my question is since we've been hearing lot of vicious lies and slander about this, could you confirm exactly why you've been fired from your job at Wendy's Chris? Cause we've been hearing all sorts of- of crazy things and we wanna know the truth.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmmmmmm... well, firstly, what have you heard?<br /><br />
'''Other guy:'''Well we heard that uh you... we've heard so many things like you helped a small child and you did a Donald Duck impersonation and you scared the child.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... also that- also that is correct but I did not scare the child. The child was tired, I was only trying ta- I was only trying to make the child feel better. That's a little amusement. But I did not make the child cry, the child was already- was just tired.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' So you didn't help them cut their food and... yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I did help them- help them get their food to- by giving them uhh, by giving them bags and a top for their baked potato boat.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris, when will um, the pictures of Zapina, appear on the um, 18 plus page?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that was a deleted scene! That was a deleted scene.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Why was it deleted?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basically, hhh... y'c- y'cant' really have it if you don't have Rosechu working to take the- working to take the pictures of herself up in the bathroom. Cause like can't have one without the other.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaahhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I don't know if this is a good question but there's something I wonder about that- we kind of have this DVD you made and... y'know, we never unfortunately got... but I'm curious um... do you ever plan to release it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I'd pay money for that, I think everyone else here would probably pay money for it too.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Indeed.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (breaking up) I wanna ask a question.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I hear it's also on YouTube.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris do you know that you've influenced the rap/hip hop community?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmh... uh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I just wanted to mention that because I saw some YouTube videos and it- and- and from some underground hip hop artists such as Immortal Technique and they've sampled some of your voice audio complaining about your struggles with uhm... with the school board, with the security guards and they were- they felt so empowered that they actually took those words and mad'em into a very powerful rap song. How does that- how is your reaction to that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhhhh... basically I have not watched those videos so... I don't have an opinion.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I will provide you a link to that, hold on a moment.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh that's ok, actually I uh, did sample one. The one where they basically played the parody from "Can't touch this".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, no, see it's waaay more serious than that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I still haven't heard of- heard of what you're talking about.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Nevermind.<br /><br />
(rustling and moving noises)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do an impression of MC Hammer?<br /><br />
(more clicking and rustling)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Can't touch this do do do doo do dooo Can't touch this! Do do do dooo do do do... can't touch this.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' That was- heheheh.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Awesome.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you- can you do Dr. Nick Riviera from the Simpsons?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> HIIII EVERYBODY!<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hello Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hi Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hi Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that should say Dr. Nick cause that's who I'm imitatin'.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''???:''' That uh-<br /><br />
'''???:''' HELLOOO EV'RYBODY!!!!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well that-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hi Dr. Nick!<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Thank you, I love the Simpsons.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do... Peter from Family Guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhenhenhenh... Hey Lois! Look at me! I'm just (unclear) you nose, and I'm eatin' your nose.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh that's dead on.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Oh would you- Omicron's been interested in tis- would you actually make a documentary like- like your other DVD but make your daily life?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... I'm... yeah I might but uh... I'm not su- I'm not sure bout it at the moment.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaaaaaaanh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris can you do Mario? You know from Super Mario?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hay paisano! How you doin' mistah hedgehog!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's very good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then Sonic- then Sonic would say "what?!?"<br /><br />
(giggling)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris do you have any plans to make a video of yourself taking a dump on a Hexbox?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No! That's gross.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Yeah that was pretty sick right there.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Let's ban him.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's bad enough I cut in half with an axe.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> and one of the elevator jokes...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Oh we remember that, that was a classic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And I earned a trophy for that.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmm...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Yeah, I remember that, it was destroying a Hexbox by cutting it in half if I remember...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' If I were to draw nude Zapina fanart, uhm, would you put them on the site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... uhh, your- you uh- free to draw them at your- at your own- own preference, but I will not be- I will not put it on the website because- cause- because I will not want to break any laws of having underage portrayals- portrayals of underage nudity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Isn't Dot a child?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry... what?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dot, from Animaniacs.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' So-uh- uhm- I think I looked up somewhere that um, drawings do not count, they're just lines on paper not like real pictures that are horrible.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah I believe-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Draw-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (cut off)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Those illustrations do not count as child pornography. Because with drawing it's art- it's artistic merit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Welll... I dunno, I guess it depends I have to- but- y'know you could do the drawing and I'll think- I'll consider it.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, would it be possible to get any pictures of Sonichu having anal sex with Rosechu?<br /><br />
(pause... thumps and feedback)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm considering that but...<br /><br />
'''Accented woman''' Who keeps letting this person in? You are very offensive.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -and and, if you draw those, do you think that Rosechu would actually clean Sonichu's penis off with her mouth (laugh) w-when they're done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nah, no, I don't think so, I think- I think- I think it would be unh- yeah w-wash it off with a washcloth.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Do you think in, at that point then they would sell the washcloth on EBay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!<br /><br />
(people talking over each other)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, no, no more party humor, all right?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah alright, okay<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Unrelated to party humor, I want to ask that in your Springbreak uhh Issue of Sonichu you had an introduction of a, of new character, the [[Yawning Squirtle|squirtle]] and I wanna ask<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:''' (interrupting)</span> No, that's, no, no, no, that's not just a character, I was, I was not introducing a new character, I was just doing like a poster thing for a bubble speak under one, I thought I just draw some water type pokemon un-in there<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I understand but the thing is there is huge cult following for that character and I strongly suggest that you should capalize on that and, and make him to a main character<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eh... No, I don't think so<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's just sleeping Squirtle work waking up<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, people just thought he was really cute and yawning Squirtle, I don't know, I heard someone say, man wouldn't it be great if he would be that [[Autistic|dopey]] sidekick that he'd come and they'd be like, like, he'd come in and say something silly after someone did something and they would be like Squirtle!<br /><br />
People laughing and talking over each other<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Ehm...<br /><br />
???: Yo, it makes you *unintelligible* (Chris and someone talk over another)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yes Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I'm asking you about... Hm... Never mind, I lost my train of thought. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's okay. These guys made me lose a train of thought as well. Doesn't multiple inputs.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yes, kinda lotta control here. I may have to... never mind<br /><br />
Silence<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I never lose my train of thought because I have a GPS tracking system on it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, that was a good joke. (chuckle)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, could you tell us a joke right now. Just any joke.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay, here is a fuck - here is a funny ...here is a funny mind scream. Funny rhyme scheme - not to be taken literally:<br /><br />
On your Game Boy Advance SP<br /><br />
create cher ME<br /><br />
den play da WII<br /><br />
with your PSP<br /><br />
hooked to your PS3<br /><br />
cause it's fun<br /><br />
see?<br /><br />
And never ff, and never play a [[Hex Box]] 360<br /><br />
Because it's stupid and you're not a dummy (in childlike voice)<br /><br />
Mock laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Is that something you made up?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I made that up<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Chris, Chris, can I write that down and tribute to quote you that? Oh man, that's good<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) So you mean to type it up and you quote me on the rhyme scheme?<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Yeah, I'd like that. I've been thinking about making a quote book like a mini Chris quote book like something you could open and have a cool line to say when you're on a party and you're like right things<br /><br />
People talking over Chris and Alucard<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, well I'm typing it up for Alucard, so...<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Thank you<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span>Chris, can we hear one more?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Here is an [[Christian's sex joke|adult joke]] I once come up<br /><br />
'''Fan''': This is going to be good!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There was this married couple, Bob and Jane, and they have been looking forward to having children. So, one night, Bob comes home from work, and Jane says, "Hi, you had a good day, dear?" And he says, "Nah, I felt alone, darling" And she said, "Well, it's okay, why don't we go upstairs, and we'll have some Breakfast." "Breakfast, at Nine p.m.?" And she says, "Sure, you bring the MILK, and I'll get an EGG."<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yo, I heard that before, man<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then later, they had a boy and a girl, Junior Bacon and Orange Juice. All Part of a Balanced Breakfast.<br /><br />
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif]]<br /><br />
Perplexed silence<br />
<br />
'''Fan''': Hey, Chris, how do you solve a Mexican tank?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Stand in front of it?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': No, man, shoot the guys pushing at it<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fans''': Oh that's a good one<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' I got one<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get a bunch of [[Niggos|blacks]] in a car?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Throw some chicken in.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get them out of the car?<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Job application<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What do you call a beach of black people buried up to their necks?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Afro-turf.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I came up with one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what's the difference between a black man and a pizza?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': A pizza can feed a family of four.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': How do you stop black people from jumping on a bed?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, enough racist jokes.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''':Put velcro on the ceiling.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enough, enough black jokes.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, uh Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Sorry<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I showed by friend that over 18 site, and he said, that he um, he um, you know he, he masturbated to it. Does that make you feel (interrupted)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's good, that's basically the reaction I would be going for. Among the male ca... among the male population, being attracted to the women.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But those are your drawings, it's like, I think he's gay now. I mean, you're a guy and you drew those.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm drawing, I'm drawing female characters.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yah, but it's drawn by you and you're, like, I don't know. It's kind of awkward for me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris, I actually need to thank you, the pictures on that site, it looked like the camera was inside Sonichu's penis when Rosechu was giving him a blowjob. That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. I've always wanted to have a camera in my penis so that I could see that if I ever got a blowjob, that would be awesome, I just wanted to say thank you very much for that perspective. It's the first time I've ever seen it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': There's a question here on the site, oh sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, well I see it... no I don't basically masturbate to my own drawings.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But you're okay if other people do, right? Even guys?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You're okay if other people, you know, masturbate to your drawings? Even if they're guys, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If the guys are masturbating to the female drawings, then yes, that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I just thought it was kind of awkward, but maybe I'm seeing it a different way.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I doubt that, uh, having a whole bunch of drawings of naked female characters can be misinterpreted as something else.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': I want to ask you a question.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': One time, a friend and I were looking at porn together, and we masturbated together, but the porn was straight, ordinary porn. Is this gay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I'm sorry, where you looking at naked women?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Yes, but we were in the same room, masturbating.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, if you both were thinking about the naked women you were looking at, then I would definitely say you both are straight, cuss you're not thinking about each other, you're thinking about the women.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Right. <br /><br />
'''Fan''': Would you do that with someone?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': I'm relieved.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Man, nigger you gay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Shut up. Would you do that with someone? Like a guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Nah, I'm straight dog.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I'd, yeah I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Omnicron has a question on here, on the side here.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You see it, or?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. That's not straight.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what about the earlier question.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, the one before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, which one before? Oh, you mean...<br /><br />
(All talk at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, what do you think about.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wait, wait let him answer.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Let him answer that one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was gonna rephrase it but okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'd say it would depend on your interpretation, what is adultery to you?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But, you know, isn't the Bible only supposed to be interpreted, it's the word of God, you're not really supposed to interpret it any other way.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': It is what it is.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's in English.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh, I have no comment.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, that's what my, uh, you know I was talking about my mom saw those drawings. I mean, not the drawings, the posters, the playboy posters and that's basically what she got bad about. She said I was committing adultery.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah okay, if you don't want to talk about it, fine.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, hmmm, I think you shou, I think you should, uh, when you, I think I can see where this could be interpreted one way or another, it depends on how you look at the woman. I mean, alright, you're looking at the, uh woman, you might be imaginin' her naked, but, I mean, you would respe, I mean, you would, you would still respect, I mean, if you were still respecting that woman, you would appreciate her more for like who she was aside or in addition to the (something), that's not as bad as just, as just only doing it for the appearance.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's why, uh, that's why the playboy magazines, they give you the introductions of the women. It's like letting you know who they are (unintelligible).<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, but there weren't any, uh, descriptions under the, yeah never mind.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Thank you for the clarification Chris.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris, do you love America?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm patriotic.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's good. I was wondering if you could sing the national anthem for us?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [[Wikipedia:My Country, 'Tis of Thee| My country tis' of thee. Sweet land of liberty. Of thee, of thee I sing.]] I don't remember the rest.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Lands where my fathers died.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Land of the pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
(Fans all start singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Stop it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey I'll, I'll tell y'all a funny joke that's kind of patriotic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, you got this, you got this funny, you got this funny Mexican guy, and he just, he just come back home to Meh-he-co after an American visit. He's like (high pitched voice) Oh the people there are so very friendly. I mean, I go to the basketball game. I sit in the back row. I sit in the back row. And then, and then, and then all of, and then all of the sudden right before the game started, everyone turned around, put their hands on their chests, and they say, "Oh say can you seeeeee"<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I thought you said no racist jokes?<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': Yeah man, that ain't cool!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was a name, it was a name joke.<br /><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''':...Spanish language<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm kind of offended by that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': That's racist dog. That ain't cool.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': You laugh you support terrorism.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, what?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What'd you say?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What the hell? Who said that?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Forget it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I said, you laugh, you support terrorism.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, he's gone.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Awful Mr. T impression) I pity the fool, who try and misinterpret things, and try and jam new words into my mouth.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You do a good Mr. T<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah you do.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) no jibber jabber.<br /><br />
(Fans laugh)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, did you watch the A-team back in the day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No but, no but, basica, but I have seen Mr. T. And then I also, I also saw when he guest starred in an episode of Alvin and the Chipmunks.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I saw that episode, he helped uh Theodore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Theodore was getting picked on.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, you posted a link here.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well at my [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|Methodist church]], uh, sex before marriage is okay as long as, uh, she and I, we love each other very much and truly.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But that's what they tell you, I'm talking about the word of God.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *Sigh* Okay, I'm getting tired, okay, I'm getting tired here, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, but...<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, sorry, no more of that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, you're right. Please stay Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay. Alright, I'll stay a little while longer.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, if anyone does, if anyone asks anything that makes him feel uncomfortable, I'm gonna kick you out of the room.<br /><br />
(Everyone speaks)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I have a Japanese friend, he's, he's actually 26 and he's never had a girlfriend and we asked him some questions, just joking around one day. And we asked him if his, when he gets married, if his wife wanted to sleep with another man, would he be okay with it, and he actually said yes, as long as she wasn't being forced. Now that kind of bothered us, because us Americans, right, we think that marriage, and you know you're with somebody, they should be faithful, but he doesn't seem to think so, so I wanted to see if you had any advice maybe on what we could do to try and convince him that his viewpoint is wrong.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, hmm, it's not necessarily that the viewpoint is wrong. See, the thing is, what, to, to quote, to make it accepta, to make it like as if you're actually cheating on somebody, cheating on your spouse in the marriage, it's like not telling them, not telling him, not telling him or her about it beforehand, but it's like, you know, you, it's like you tell them beforehand and you get their approval, it's, it's okay, even if they don't want to be part of it. But not telling them, that's definitely like cheating on them.<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that's another thing I would have to think about, cuss got a bit of a, couple of items of destruction(?) that need to be repaired<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I just got, I just talked to that one friend I was talking about who, uh, saw your website, the 18 one, and it turns out he's, he's gay, he's actually gay and he fapped, uh I mean he masturbated to, uh, Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hahaha, your friend's a fag.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': And I think he's...<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out for 15 seconds)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ...about that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I think in case you would definitely want to let him know that you are straight and you don't want that kind of relationship, and maybe, and you know<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I tell him just to get the hell away from your site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm not saying that, but like, uh, you know, you don't want that kind, you don't, I mean that's, that's basically confirmed on that note. So, uh, you want, you still wanna be friends but you don't, but you're not into that kind of thing.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I mean, he was looking at your site, like, the 18 site and he was in like, um,<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Over 18.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': The over 18 site you made. The loveshack. I thought he was just like, you know, masturbating to Rosechu, but it turns out he was attracted to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *sigh* Uhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, I don't think I'll be friends with this guy anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, yeah, then tell him, yeah, to get the hell out of your house and stay away if you don't want to be friends anymore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Seems like you know too many gay friends mister.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh shut up.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris, you know how cologne or perfume, you know, women wear that to try and attract men? Do you think that farts attract gay guys to each other?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Now that's stupid! Not only is that stupid, but it's gross.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Here, I'm gonna take that question and I'm gonna, I'm gonna take that question and spin that into something that's less weird. What would you say the best cologne or whatever a guy could wear to get a girl's attention?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I recommend [[Axe|Axe]] body spray.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh yeah? I think I tried that one time.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': That actually does it for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What scent do you use?<br /><br />
(All speak)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Don't you use ass body spray?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Mmm, love it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Does the Axe effect, does it really exist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Does Axe exist?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, the Axe effect. You know, they say in the commercials spray it and girls will come to you.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) and it works for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Has it worked for you Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, well, yeah, I, yeah I haven't got that working for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I think it's a scam personally.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I mean... I mean, Old Spice is pretty good. I had, I had like a couple of girls go up to me asking me for dates with Old Spice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I actually wore that Orion sent, uhh, still smelling it. So it will work Chris, you just gotta give it time.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Using the Axe.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Cameron but, isn't Axe spray for men?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': No no no no no no no, see, see I said a boyfriend, a boyfriend that I met.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, okay.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah. *laughs*<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Perfect sense.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, silly, silly. I have a question for you Chris, what celebrities have you met?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Well what I'm saying is the Axe effect doesn't work. Okay, sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't actually met any celebrities in person, my real life, unless you count a local radio DJ.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I've met the DJ of my radio station 95.1 and [[Excel Saga|Monica Rial]], and meeting Monica Rial was just a treat.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ahhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was, it was good.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, she's pretty.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Maybe you should go to her and, um, maybe she could be like a contact for voice acting. I mean, you do pretty good imitations.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Do Homer Simpson!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Homer Simpson impression) Oh, look at me! I'm a stupid old person, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp, D'OH!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That was awesome<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Who else can you do Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What other imitations can you do?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, a lot. It depends on if you name it, I might recall, if you name the person or character I'll, if I can recall my memory than I will imitate that person.<br /><br />
<br />
(transcribing end for now at 1:23:00)<br /><br />
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{{Transcription}}<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 6|Mumble Chat 6]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 8|Mumble Chat 8]]|}}<br />
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==Links==<br />
* [https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBWklfakp0TGdDSkU Download]<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
<br />
[[Christian's sex joke]] - Used during this chat.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_7&diff=163078Mumble 72012-09-27T20:40:43Z<p>Irisviel: </p>
<hr />
<div>'''Mumble 7''' is the seventh of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]], held on 13 [[February 2009]].<br />
<br />
Appears to be the genesis for the "Power" videos in which Chris attempts and fails to prove his [[I AM STRONG|strength]] and [[CWC Fighter|fighting]] [[Challenge For Clyde|skill]], though these would not materialize for several months.<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
* A fan talks to Chris about putting naked posters of girls and pictures of men up in his room up to find out if his friend was a [[homo]] as Chris suggested. He tells Chris that his girlfriend dumped him over the posters and his friend ignored all of them. Chris sees nothing wrong with his advice until Julie tells him that she wouldn't like that. Chris recommends sending an anonymous letter explaining the situation and utterly fails to apologize or show concern.<br />
* Fans point out that Chris shouldn't have to show and prove that he is straight.<br />
* Chris cuts a fan off to let Julie ask a question involving [[pedofork|shota]].<br />
* Fans ask Chris to turn his radio down.<br />
* Chris uses Wal-Mart printer paper & RSVP ballpoint pen to draw, and a 50-pack of Crayola markers to color. Refuses to use color pencils or Photoshop to color, saying he prefers the markers.<br />
* Chris talks about Omicron's redone version of [[Sonichu]], accusing him of plagiarism. Says that the difference between what Omicron is doing and what he is doing is that Sonichu is his. Agrees to let Omicron continue if he credits Chris with the copyright.<br />
* '''Julie is convincing Chris to make videos proving to Clyde how strong he is.''' Chris feels that the [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|dildo breaking video]] proved this. Fans say that Chris's dildo comes apart naturally for cleaning.<br />
* '''A fan recommends making a video showing off his fighting moves to scare Clyde.'''<br />
* Chris is asked why he would use a dildo in proving that he is straight. Chris says that he is straight for crushing it, fans call him a [[homo]] for keeping it.<br />
* Chris [[lie|denies]] [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|using the dildo]], and claims that it's now broken. Fan says it could easily be reassembled. Chris is adamant that it was glued and that it took a lot of strength to pull it apart.<br />
* When asked by Julie, '''Chris admits using super-shears from Cutco to break the dildo glue, claiming to use a lot of strength in the process'''.<br />
* Fans discuss [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]]. Chris insists that it was drawn in protest of [[ED]]. He says it was anonymous, as most women have long brown hair and her eyes were censored.<br />
* Insists that [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:AngelicainGod%27sEyes.JPG the Rule 34 of Angelica Rosechu] is masturbating and enjoying it, and is using her hand to do it.<br />
* Chris thinks Billy Mays is on Home Improvement.<br />
* Chris isn't doing anything on Valentine's Day, as Julie is not there yet.<br />
* Chris discusses the the No-Redheads policy in his [[Love Quest]]. Says that redheads don't attract him unless they are not natural redheads. No piercings or tattoos allowed.<br />
* Chris is OK with blue hair.<br />
* Does a terrible Marge Simpson impersonation.<br />
* Chris impersonates Comic Book Guy and Donald Duck.<br />
* A fan presents the possibility that AIDS was sent by God to kill the [[homos]].<br />
* [[Chris and Religion|Premarital sex being forbidden in Christianity]] is discussed. Chris fumbles for an explanation.<br />
* '''A fan pretending to be black says he believes the government made AIDS to get rid of black people. Chris says that that's the kind of thing a black guy would say'''.<br />
* Premarital sex comes up again. Chris compares it to using porn to practice and learn skills for later.<br />
* The fake black fan calls Chris on his comment from earlier about black guys and AIDS. He makes the excuse that someone else said it first.<br />
* Questions on Sonichu start. Sonichu doesn't wear clothes because it's a comic. Chris isn't sure how [[Blake]] sounds. He might sound black, he might sound like Shadow the Hedgehog. The fake black fan asks why the bad guy has to be black, also mentioning [[Silvana]]. Chris says that he doesn't have to be.<br />
* Chris gets annoyed about the pronunciation of [[Rosechu]] as popularized by the Old Narrator of the [[Audiobooks]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't disagree that the Audiobooks made Sonichu more popular that he ever did'''.<br />
* He doesn't mind fanfics that don't portray Sonichu in a bad light.<br />
* The audio goes low in the main chat and a fan has a private, unrelated conversation for a few minutes.<br />
* Audio comes back as Chris is admitting that the [[B-Manajerk]] was black in real life.<br />
* Chris doesn't watch the news, so doesn't have an opinion on [[Barack Obama|Obama]]. He voted for him because he saw a documentary where he saw more of himself in Obama, namely that he was an outcast at one point.<br />
* A fan says that you should vote based on politics, not personality. Chris says that he is a moderate.<br />
* Chris doesn't know what the financial bailout is. He says that he drew the [[Sonichu 8#The Elevator Gags|racist picture]] of Obama based on his father's joke, before he saw the documentaries that made him vote.<br />
* Chris will not agree or disagree with interracial dating/marriage. He would want a white woman, but he would be [[gal pals|friends]] with others.<br />
* He'd marry an Asian.<br />
* It's not yet known if Silvana will be a good guy or if she will lose her [[pickle|dick]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't know what he wanted to be when he was younger, he's just making it up as he goes along'''.<br />
* '''Chris is keeping the name changes in the comics for legal reasons'''.<br />
* A fan suggests Slaweel cursing Rosechu to have a dick. Chris gets upset before saying that he'll think about it. The fans think it's a great idea. One considers a talking penis for Rosechu. Chris says it's a stupid idea.<br />
* Another fan asks about Chris being sacked from Wendy's. He denies scaring the child with his Donald Duck impersonation, saying that he didn't make him cry.<br />
* Chris might release his DVD one day.<br />
* A fan says that Chris has influenced underground rappers such as Immortal Technique, who has sampled him.<br />
* Chris takes requests. Impersonates MC Hammer, Dr Nick Riviera, Peter from [[Family Guy]], Mario and Sonic, butchering them all and tainting our childhood memories.<br />
* More Sonichu questions. '''Chris won't upload [[Zapina]] [[Rule 34]] because she is underage and Chris is worried about legal ramifications'''. When he is reassured that this would be legal, he says he would consider it. He will also consider Sonichu-Rosechu anal sex. Rosechu would not clean the [[pickle]] with her mouth, she would clean it off with a washcloth. He would not sell the the washcloth on EBay.<br />
* Chris calls a stop to the potty humor displayed throughout the Sonichu questions.<br />
* '''Chris denies that [[Yawning Squirtle]] is a character'''.<br />
* Fans ask for a joke. He recites a dreadful rhyme about Videogame consoles. He then tells his awful [[Christian's sex joke|sex joke]]. Fans start to tell racist jokes about [[niggos|black people]] and Mexicans. Chris calls for a stop to this.<br />
* A fan says that his friend [[mass debating|masturbated]] to the [[rule 34|adult section of Sonichu]] and is now worried that his friend is a [[homo]], as they were drawn by a man. '''Chris says that this is what he intended it for''', and they are drawings of women, so his friend is straight. He doesn't masturbate to his own drawings.<br />
* Chris reassures a fan that [[Mass Debating|masturbating]] in the same room as another man isn't gay as long as both men are thinking of women, but he would not do this.<br />
* Chris offers no comment as to what constitutes adultery.<br />
* Chris says that he is patriotic. Asked to sing the national anthem, he instead mangles a few lines of "My Country, 'Tis of Thee". He then tells a 'patriotic' joke that is insensitive to Mexicans. [[Chris and Hypocrisy|The fans call him on his "no more racist jokes" statement from earlier]].<br />
* Chris does a poor impersonation of Mr T.<br />
* Chris says that if you are married, sleeping with someone else isn't cheating if you have consent from your spouse.<br />
* Chris gives more advice on homos and recommends Axe body spray for attracting girls.<br />
* Chris has not met any celebrities, only local DJs.<br />
* Does impersonations of Homer Simpson and Bender. The two sound identical.<br />
* Chris gives dating advice: Stay calm, polite, friendly and don't let your nerves get the best of you. Say "Hello, how are you" and talk about yourself. '''[[Barbara|His mom]] told him that standing around with a sign makes him look retarded. A female fan cracks up laughing and can't stop'''.<br />
* "Those who can't, teach"<br />
* Chris says he has never even been on a date. Rejects dating suggestions from fans.<br />
* '''Chris was close with Sarah "[[PandaHalo]]" McKenzie, but hasn't heard from her in over two weeks. He heard about the fires and doesn't know if she's still alive. When a fan adds that 108 people were killed in the fires, Chris responds to the entire ordeal with [[Chris and death|"It's OK though, at least I have a good woman who's willing to be by my side at this point"]]'''.<br />
* When pushed, he says he feels remorse for the the victims of the fires and is concerned that [[Sarah Cassandra McKenzie|Panda]] is dead.<br />
* He asserts that he didn't abandon Sarah for [[Julie]].<br />
* '''A fan says that if [[PandaHalo|Sarah]] isn't alive, Chris should take solace that her perfectly barbecued remains fed the survivors. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|SHUT UP!!!]]'''<br />
* Chris says that he cares about Sarah and Julie equally and wouldn't dump Julie as a friend. A fan asks what he will do to the survivors who ate Sarah. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|"SHUT UP!!!"]] and demands that he be booted.<br />
* Fans reassure Chris that Sarah is probably OK.<br />
* Chris does abominable impersonations of Uncle Ruckus from The Boondocks and Hank Hill. '''He sings "Don't Trust Them New [[Niggos|Niggas]] Over There"'''. He also impersonates Meowth and sings the Team Rocket song.<br />
* [[Clyde]] enters. Chris refuses to answer questions and leaves.<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
===Chris proves he is straight===<br />
'''Guy:''' Chris!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all! ''[echoes]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'll be damned.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh, Chris-[gets cut off by another guy]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh you know, can't com- it's uh, can't complain.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' How's construction of the site?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' [unintelligible] so Chris<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I...I need to ask you something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yup?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh... I put those posters, of the... Playboy and everything in my room, and uh, one of my girlfriends saw it, and she got mad at me for looking at other w-... other girls, and she broke up with me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh... I'm sorry to hear that. It could-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, she's calling me a pervert. I-I don't understand this.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Did you... did you ex- did you try to explain to her about situation between you and that guy?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I... I did, and I don't think she understood.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... well, you should try, you should, uh, s-... try, uh, you should try wr-, you should tr-, uh, do you know her email address?<br /><br />
[pause]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So, uh Chris-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' A-also, wait... also, uh, the friend, I was talking about, he, uh, visited, and [typing noises] he, uh, he went into my room, and didn't even notice the posters. He just s-sat in the middle, he didn't s...sit in any uh, part of the room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Huh. Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, uh... so, yeah, I don't know. I mean, my girlfriend broke up with me, called me a pervert, said that I shouldn't be looking at other girls, I mean... I don't know what to do now.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well listen, uh, answer my question, do you have her email address?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Umm... yeah, but she won't... she won't answer me anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm... ok, hmm. Here's what you can do, uh... Do you know your girlfriend's... any of your girlfriend's [[Gal pal|gal-pals]]?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm... well, you should try to... like wr- you should write out... hmm... hmm... here's an idea. S- Write a letter to her and send it via smail mai-, via snail mail, but don't write the return address. On it.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What should I write?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just like, you know, like, they, you know, this is... you know, this is... you, uh, you put your name there, and you, it's, and then you would basically explain the situation between you and that guy, and that's why you had the posters up, well that's why you put the posters up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't really understand what was the point of the posters in the first place?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[sigh]'' it's... ''[sigh]'' if he looks at... if he, if he is very interested, if he is, if he was straight, he would uh, look at the women. Very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But he didn't even notice them. He didn't notice any of the posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, then I guess he is a [[Homos|homo]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' W...well, um, he wasn't looking at anything, not even the guy posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Hmm... He's not blind, surely.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, like, what is he, is he like, uh...I don't know.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I don't know either, man. But, you know at the moment I would suggest you, uh, write the- write the letter to your girlfriend, send the mail, don't write your return address on the envelope, and, uh, mail it to her.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Also my mom saw the posters and she got offended, she's like really religious and st- she said that like, uh, you know, lust is a sin or some shit. Oh, like she said, she's like all against the, the uhh, the like, Playboy in my room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, your- apparently your mom hasn't been [beeps] that open minded that time. So, you know, give her time to reh-cover, she'll uh, she might op- she might open up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I don't think that was a good idea though, I mean, w-why did-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -you suggest it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I was trying to see if he, to, I was trying to s-help you figure out if your uh, if your friend was a homo or not.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I know, but, do you have uh, [Fans talking] Playboy posters in your room?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unclear] I'm very forward.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I have uh, poster of some, of uh, I have a poster in my room of uh, some uh, naked girls I got from adamandeve.com as a bonus.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Then, nobody says anything about it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[clears throat]'' Well, I didn't really have too many oppor- too many people in my room. So, it's kind of like in a hard to notice place.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Um, wondering, um, If you showed anyone, wouldn't they be offended?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe, maybe not, [Fan grunts] it just depends on their point of view.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I wouldn't want the same thing that happened to me to happen to you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I hear you there. Uh, just to so just sound clear... Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie, are you there?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ok, uh, would you be offended if you saw such a poster in my room?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''[breaks up]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, What will, what was that? [Echoes]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie'''</span> Yes I would, kind of.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well that's no problem, I can take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, see that's what I'm talking about, I mean...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, that's why I asked Julie right now, because I respect her. So, because she said that she would, I will take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I've been thinking, um...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you have... [unclear] Chris, I don't think you should look at other woman.[sic] In my opinion.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I see, Julie. Well that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I...I respect that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' She might get jealous, I mean, that's what happened to my...my girlfriend.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, that's fine Julie, I respect your, I respect that. Just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey, can I ask you a question? If uh, he's done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, uh, one more thing, um, you know I've been thinking, uh, I don't really think you need, you know, posters and stuff like,<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' to prove you're straight, I mean, if you're straight, that's all there is to it i-if, am I right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think you're right.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I...I mean, you shouldn't have to prove that you're straight.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> You're right.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I m-mean [line breaks temporarily] Y-you shouldn't have to reassure yours-self. You should just be knowing it, and nothing anybody says, should get very, uh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, it's ve-ah-very-but you see, I have like, I have that [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] in my room, it's just, so that like, you know, for in case I have any-for in case I have any random thoughts, on account really, to tempt me.<br /><br />
''[unintelligible mix of chatter from most participants trying to get their word in]''<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I mean, even if they're random thoughts, even if they're random thoughts, if you know you're ''positive'' about it, you shouldn't have to look at anything to make sure.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, usually.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay. Uh, moving on from all this homosexuality, uh, I have one question, uh- [gets cut off by Chris in the background] ...never mind, [fat douchebag?]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey, ah, let Julie ask a question, let Julie ask her question.<br /><br />
<br />
===7:08 Julie asks about shotacon===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, I was watching you on the Internet yesterday and, what's a shotacon?[slightly cut off]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...I'm sorry, uh-y, I'm sorry, you got cut off, what was that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> What's a sho-[cuts off again]-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...What's a...''short''?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Shot-[cuts off third time, pretty obvious she's saying ''shota'']-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dude, shota.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, shota.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ssshhhh...shota?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, S-H-O-A-T-A [sic].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, it's a word he found online.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, [baby?], yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never heard of that word.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I dunno, if you want to look it up, you can probably find out on an online dictionary...<br /><br />
''[pause, and a weary sigh from someone other than Chris]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'll-I'll take a look. Hang on.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I know some Japanese and I think I've heard that somewhere, like in a magazine or something.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, it's some of that Japanese shit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Probably is. Three moments, I'll look it up.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Okay!<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's radio is audible]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Whoops, that was the wrong one. The wrong bookmark.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' S-H-O-T-A.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I know, I just get the wrong bookmark for...place I wi-for like...dictionary-type website that I have.<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's keyboard taps are audible]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uhhh...Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, now that Julie's done with her question, I also had one.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' He has to find what that means first.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, ''I'm sorry''.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Shit, ah shit, I've just found it on Wikipedia. It's, uh, it's a ma-it's a Japanese name. It's a name of a person. In Japan.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Really.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a Japanese name. I think it's-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh no no, I think you're looking at the wrong thing, it's S- S-H-O-T-A-C-O-N.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> S-H- I mean- O-T-A-C-O-N? Shotacon?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's the same thing, just put C-O-N at the end.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I've read it in a dictionary before, can't remember what it means...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, oh! Okay, here it is, uh..."shotacon, sometimes shortened to shota, is Japanese slang of the phrase 'Shotaro Complex'"...uh..."that describes the attraction to young boys or an individual with such an attraction".<br /><br />
''[Disgusted reactions heard]''<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh my god, what the fuck?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' There's lots of sick people. Y'all are gonna get ricked?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Someone from 4 cent garbage came in and told us to look that up, I didn't-I didn't even want to.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess he's a homo...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Don't worry I banned him already.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Um, Chris, Vivian wants to know if you can like, turn your radio down a bit, it's distracting.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yes, please turn it down.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I thought that was quiet enough, here.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, no, the lady'll probably pick it up<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Alright cool. Merci.<br /><br />
<br />
===10:21 Another fan asks about art supplies===<br />
<br />
'''Another Fan:''' Okay, um, I have a question, um, I like to draw—interrupted by mumbling—I like to draw comics and such, I mean I want to start up a webcomic. What kind of materials do you use?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, like, you mean for drawing?<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well mostly I just use like, uh, paper without lines, like, computer printer paper you can get in, like, Wal-Mart, for an inexpensive price in multiples.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then I use like an RES—RSVP-brand pen with the black ink.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh okay, is it like, um, a gel pen or a ballpoint pen or-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like a ballpoint, it's like a ballpoint pen.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What do you use to color?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I use Crayola brand markers.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would like to—I would—I would—I would recommend getting the Super Tip 50-pack which you can also find at the Wal-Mart.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay. I-[interrupted by someone else on chat]<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's basically-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' At Wal-Mart I usually get the 24-color RoseArts. Those are—those do pretty good too.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhh, Vivian, just so you—just so you know, I'm using the microphone that came with Hey You, Pikachu for Nintendo Sisty-Four [sic].<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, yeah no, no offense, but uh, personally I prefer like, colored pencils and shit cause-[Chris mumbling is heard]-they're like easier to erase. Photoshop [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If you want to use colored pencils that's fine, I'm not, uh, saying that you have to use Crayola markers-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why don't you use colored pencils? They're really good, you should try one on like, at least one page, just try one. One page with just colored pencils.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But um, actually, you can—you can scan your drawings and then color—color them in like, Photoshop or something. [rest of chat murmurs in agreement] That looks really professional, and really good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I prefer using the markers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's just that I-I mean—I mean I've tried—I mean I've colored with colored pencils before, and I just feel best with using markers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I have a question, um, uh, the Hey You Pikachu microphone, how does that work on the, you're using that on your computer? Did you say?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah it's just, yeah, it's like you plug it into uh, into the basic microphone jack.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh, yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Excuse me, I have a nice little Plantronics headset.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Hey Chris can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah, hang on a second, uh... uh, Omicron, that's uh, you're basically, uh, you're basically plagiarizing here. You're even using, uh, parts of my original drawings to, uh, make up your so called real ones and, you're just—you're just parroting—you're just plagiarizing-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's dirty and illegal.<br /><br />
[Unintelligible mumbling]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, you said so yourself, you're being illegal. And plus, and plus I'm-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, isn't combining Sonic with Pikachu the same thing?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, but, but but also, look at this, also I'm looking at this site here, it said, he's claiming the copyright for himself, but he's, but he's not. I mean that's like, but he's, he—he says<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' You need to ban him immediately.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, ban him immediately.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh wait wait wait wait wait...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah maybe you should check-[interrupted by loud noise, probably Chris]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well he said that, he's saying that all of Sonichu material is copyrighted by him, when it's clearly not.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah but you use Sonic and Pikachu, and you copyrighted it-<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' He just offered to give you credit-[interrupted by noisy chatter]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean, I put, I mean, yeah but, I mean, I'm talking about the—the Omnicron [sic] guy here, that's like, just put this link here.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh he offered to give you credit-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes that's the same thing you did.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well no no, he, no-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We decided-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No he's plagiarizing MY Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We just decided [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris it's, it's a parody, kinda like Sonichu is.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but he—yeah, but he's saying, he said—he—on his front page he says, all Sonichu material-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah but he's, he just offered to change it, so are you okay with that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> By changing it to Sonichu X-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, he said he'll give you credit instead of claiming it for himself.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, uh, yeah I would appreciate that, that would be better, yeah, if... he changed that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Alright cool.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Problem solved.<br /><br />
<br />
===15:02 Chris talks about dildos to prove his strength===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes Julie.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you think you could tell everyone about my idea? And, since you're going to do it do you think you could tell everyone so they could look out for it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, your idea... um, oh oh oh, yeah, just basically a video of me standing up to Clyde and showing him how strong I am, doin' a few kicks for the camera or something-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, you should throw some punches, show him what you're made of, you know?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Kick, punch, it's all in the mind ''etc.''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I basically... I pretty much did that when I...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Let him talk, c'mon!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I pretty much did - already proved my strength when I... ripped that... ''dildo'' in half.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Foreign-Sounding Guy:''' Most dildos come apart for cleaning.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' C'mon.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but that thing was screwed together at the seam.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok listen to me...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris...<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' Eh Chris!<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ...could you do a like further test of your strength for me?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''stress sigh'' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I wanna see how strong you are please.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...That's fine, I can do that.<br /><br />
'''Other Fan:''' I mean that's ok, you showed your strength, but you should show her your moves. Like show her, like, what kind of moves you can do.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, let me tell you a story about how this'll work, ok.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' See, my, uh, one of my cousins, uh, this guy at school, kept, y'know, picking on him, calling him gay and stuff, and trying to fight with him, and my cousin told him to sss- y'know, one day, the guy said "Hey man, I'm gonna beat you up" and my cousin said "Look, if I show you some of my moves, I'll prove to you I can kick your ass in a fight" and so my cousin, y'know, he stepped back and, he took, uh, he took Tae Kwon Do, and he did a couple moves, y'know? He just stood there for like five minutes just doing his moves, and, y'know, some punches and kicks and... The guy just backed right off; he didn't even want to talk to him any more. So I think that should work.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> All right, well I'll try that. I'll try that.<br/><br />
'''Guy:''' All right. Sounds good.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br?><br />
'''Fan:''' You try- you always mention about how you're straight but yet in your video about you crushing a dildo, uh, doesn't that kinda like, y'know, not help your cause?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, it proves I'm straight because...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' But you have a dildo.<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I got it free with an order on adameve.com<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' But you ''kept'' it and shit. That ain't cool.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' What I don't... Why were there batteries in...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh yeah Chris, why ''were'' there batteries in it? Why did you keep it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I mean...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it wasn't an easy thing for me to sell, right off the bat, or even to make a profit, so...<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In fact in a way it's a good thing I kept it, cause it allowed me to be able to break it, like I did.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes but why would you keep it?<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why would you keep it?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I woulda saved it for my sweetheart, if she'd wanted it. To use it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Aaaahhh.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But if I were there wouldn't you prefer the real deal?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Some things that metal just can't replace.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Yeah.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I heard that.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' You didn't use it did you?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No I did not.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Did you just throw all the ones you had away?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I only had that one. And there you go, I ri- there you go, I broke it apart.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you just, like, ''take'' it apart, I mean, it did...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' ...seem to come apart, like, screwed on...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I did not take it apart, that thing was glued at the seam. I had to put a lot of strength into breaking it at the middle there.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, but I think, um, showing your moves would be better.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Right.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Clyde would mess with you if you show him you can kick his ass.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey, Chris's a muthafuckin' ''gangsta''!<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Blap blap.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yes, Chris will fuck Clyde's shit up.<br /><br />
(awkward pause)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait, Chris, didn't you say you used a - didn't you say you used scissors to break the dildo?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I pretty much did have to so I could break that ''glued seam''.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, I thought you broke it with your hands.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well I- yeah well I would have but it was dang glued at the seam, so I clipped straight in with the scissors I had.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a pair of Super Shears from [[Cutco]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(feigning interest)'' Huh.<br /><br />
<br />
===19:50 Chris defends his Rule 34===<br />
<br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, let's talk about something else. Uh, Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whenever the announcement of the adult Sonichu page, when I looked at your gallery, very nice stuff, you know, I see a picture of what looks like you with a Sonichu, uh, medallion. Like, and, who's that one girl, exactly?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Who, [[Megan]]?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I thought it was, like, [[Crystal]], cause of the hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, it was - it was originally drawn to be Megan but I censored her eyes to, uh, port- to protect her identity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Mmmmmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''(laughing)'' That's stupid! (?) That's so silly.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I drew that after I found the ED page in November.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you say that?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In protest against it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thought you were going to get rid of it anyway.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I tore up the original drawing, I, in- into squares, and I put in in an envelope.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you upload it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you do that shit? Like, and...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I understand Rosechu, but, like y'know, why, like, something that's from real life. That's the problem (?)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's not necessarily from real life, it depends on you inter- it depends on your interpretation, I mean it's hardly- I mean, '''most women have long brown hair, and the eyes are censored''', so...<br/><br />
(laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''Most'' women?!?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I remember in that one video you were saying it was Megan.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because it broke, because it end up, because it the end it broke up my friend - broke up my friendship eve, my uh, friendship with Megan.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um, can I ask you a question? In the third picture, with [[Angelica Rosechu]], what is... what's happening, is... God... doing...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nope. She's masturbating. And she's enjoying it.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But she has no hands there. How's she doing it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' She's ''enjoying'' it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But she does... She does...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah but how's she doing it? She doesn't have her hands there.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> She does have her hands, she's... ''(stress sigh)'' She's... like most women would be able to do the same thing.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thing it's the angle, Julie. I think it's the angle you were looking at it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah plus uh, the picture wasn't, uh, very - wasn't as clear as, like, you know, I would have liked to have had it, uh, I mean, I had that file for a while, and it...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah some of those are kinda blurry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, some deg- some degraded.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ? a good question, have you drawn anything... of... have you drawn anything like that with me? Cause I would actually like to see, if you did. If so, could you, and let me see? I, uh, sorry, that's very rude to ask.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm sorry, let me answer this guy. Yeah, well, I made a retraction video later saying that I- I disowned that address.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ah, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just after that guy hacked into it and changed to it to suck. And as such.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hang on, I'm gonna take a look at that... My Youtube...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I like this song.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What song?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' The song that's playing in the background of, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what do you think of, uh, what do you think of that guy who advertises products, Billy Mays? What do you think of him?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... Billy... Oh! Yeah he's an ok guy, I watched him on Home Improvement.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Billy Mays?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, that was another guy on Home Improvement, Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No that was the same guy. That was the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Really?!? Let's look up. IMDB, go. ''(sound of typing)''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Believe me, it's the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, I really enjoyed your, um, adult, uh, section of the site.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... okey dokey, very good. Aaahh, trying to figure out how to update the link on this thing here. Oh, maybe under here. Oh there it is, thank God (?), update right now.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(singing)'' You spin me right round baby, right round...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (joining in) Like a record baby, right round round round<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's a classic, I can't help in man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There you are, updated. It's finally fixed.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Actually that was Richard Karn on Home Improvement, not Billy Mays.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well my mistake, I mean the guy had the beard and uhh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh yeah I can understand.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And the voice sounds- and the voice sounds the same...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah. They sound the same.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There's a matter of interpretation apparently I misinterpreted so I will admit that I was wrong.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah see we all make mistakes, don't be too hard on yourself.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unintelligible babble or singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you gotten any fan art submissions or notable? For the uh- webpage?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I got one today... It's like mostly a drawing of that uh that uh- of the fan herself.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -got in the snail mail today.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -Sunday.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hmmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What are you doing for this Valentine's day Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhm... I'm sorry, what was that question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What will you be doing this year on Valentine's day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm depends...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ahhh, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm.<br /><br />
Fan: Surely a man of such magnitude as yourself are going to be doing something important, aren't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Magnitude? Way to choose the words buddy.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Vocabulary talent.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, cause I don't have Julie over here yet.<br /><br />
(Reactions of OHs and AHs)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If she was here...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible) -play games.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Or we could just uh... talk.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Ehehehehe. Maybe... uh... why no redheads?<br /><br />
'''Other Woman:''' Yeah?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I was trying to think about that when the other guy asked that question. Uh... I was trying to think up that unh... mmmm... Uhhhh, redheads just don't be very- tract me so much.<br /><br />
Several: Uh, ah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's- it's- a- pi- a possibility that they're dyed.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmmmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But yeah y'know natural redheads enh, yeah, just don't really turn me on as much.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I see...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you thought about girls with um, highlights?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... (pause) aaahhhh... what turns me on hhh- (inhales) (pause) obviously the women.<br /><br />
'''Man:''' Gotta have the women. (?)<br /><br />
'''Guy''': What about piercings or tattoo?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, neither of those.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhhh-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris! How bout like non-orange hair, not like... no, never mind. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... oh... okay... hmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait Chris! How do you feel about blue hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Blue hair's okay, otherwise I wouldna- Otherwise I wouldn't've liked Sailor Mercury.<br /><br />
'''British? guy:''' That is true, she does have blue hair.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' She's a very fine character. There is no way to deny it.<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Blue hair is OFF DA HOOK!!!<br/><br />
<br />
===28:35 Chris impersonates various cartoon characters===<br />
<br />
'''British??? guy:''' Doesn't Marge Simpson have blue hair as well?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (in some kind of insane voice) Oh yeah! Marge Simpson has blue hair and it's as tall as the Empire State building!!!<br /><br />
(Some HMMs UHs and UMs follow)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yo Chris!! Can you do some impersonations for us?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Oh we'd love to hear that!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just did Marge Simpson.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah you're really talented.<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(Several people talking at once)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> -they're really good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Do another SimpsonsChris, how about Comic Book Guy?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Mmmmhmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I'm very indeed. Oh aren't we all promiscuous and whatnot. I like Batman and Robin, oh look! Stan Marsh has come into the thing again - I forget that guy's name, that guy who did the Marvel comics.<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Stan Lee. (Pause) Chris do your Donald Duck impression.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Everybody have fun (incoherent and scary quacking)<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris you should work for Disney.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's good Chris.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Have you ever considered being a voice actor?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Errrrrp... possibly, I'm not sure.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (incoherent, cut off by Chris)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent... another cartoon voice)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris, you're a Christian, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I was just wondering-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahm actu-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -do you just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm actually a Methodist church.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome, I was just wondering: Do you think AIDS was sent by god to kill the homos or do you think that it's just an accident or something man-made?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thou- the thought never occurred to me... thought never occurred to me.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' can you do an impression of Arnold Schwarzenegger?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hold- the question...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Let Chris answer the question.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thought- the thought never occurred to me about what you just said about the AIDS there mmmm... but y'know, it's a possibility and I will not agree nor disagree with it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I was just wondering I mean, I've had that discussion with some of my Christian friends. I just wanted to get your opinion, thank you.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmhhh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think (clears throat) I think Omicron has a point and you did tell me you went to a methodist church didn't you? So that's-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well th- well my Methodist church is uh more loose on- is not as strict on uh- on uh sex.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris I don't know- I don't know that much about religion in the States but I don't think there is a looser Meth- Methodist church. God makes the rules Omicron says.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, hmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well, you know personally I think that the government made AIDS to kill off all the brothers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whoa, whoa... That's what the blacks always say.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. (pause) I'm going to agree, that sounds like something that uh... well, a black guy would say.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So your church is kinda of uh- they let you do- their kinda loose on the whole moral restrictions?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... (pause) uhhh... that's... what's the question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Your church they- you said they're kind of more uh- y'know they're less strict on the whole moral thing, like, as far as sexuality goes? Right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -ah basically.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But y'know, uhh, I thought you're supposed to listen to the Bible or whatever not, y'know, not necessarily- no, never mind.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (interrupts)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, there's also a uh, there's also a- think about this uh, if you uh- if you- if you were a think uh- you have to find for yourself a good meaning behind uh- good meaning behind watching pornography to uh- like teach how it- how to do this and that when you actually get around to doing it...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's all ???<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's all's considered education for yourself.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' How is that realistic at all?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, it's uh- not a really good thing to learn from, trust me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It can be done before marriage as well as long as me and my sweetheart really love each other very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But not in Christianity.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But all I'm saying is y'know, porn is completely, completely unre- unrealistic I mean you can't really learn anything from it.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It gives- it gives you enough ideas.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unclear)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (incoherent) porn.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' When you actually have sex, it's nothing like porn.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe not like you, you not gonna do it-<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' You can't do it immediately- immediately anal sex cause most women are not very happy with anal sex and also...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay, shut up<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' -and also weird-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Shut up.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Yes.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And... that wasn't cool, like...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That was uncalled for...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, like, suthin' a BLACK MAN would say...<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' That's racist man...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, somebody said it on here first before I did.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Does that make it ok?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, I think he's trying to make it clear that- I dunno.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I typically agree with that guy.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So nothing g- it doesn't make it ok.<br /><br />
(incoherent)<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling) I wi- I'm sorry, I take it back.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(unclear)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Guys can we get back to Sonichu, Please?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah this is getting ridiculous.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unclear) -Sonichu actually.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Anyway, my question is that: why does Sonichu not wear clothes while Rosechu and the other Rosechus do wear clothes? And underwear?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Aaaaaaaaaamp... It's like uh- it's basically a cartoon and it doesn't really matter, it's like... mm... think about this: Most cartoon characters wear at least one article of clothing. At least one article. And uh- it's like Yogi Bear who just wears a necktie and a hat.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 35.14)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Other Guy:''' I think it would be cool if all the Sonichus and Rosechus got together and they and- they all formed a big team and they had special uniforms or something, kinda like the X-men.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Or Power Rangers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh yeah, I don't do- I don't do well- I'm not in- no uniforms. It's a uniform and other Sonichus and Rosechus.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'm just wondering if you'd do another impression: What does Blachu sound like? Uh, Black Sonichu? Or Blake?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eeeeuuunh... Eh... ahhhh...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Can you imitate it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... I'm not sure... uhhhhm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Like does he sound black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Possibly, but I'm not certain. I'm not leaning towards it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I'd like to hear it, but if you don't want...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just never- I just never really thought about that. I'd say that he possibly sounds similar to uh, y'know Shadow the hedgehog. But he could possibly sound, black. He could. Don't quote me on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' All right, I was just wondering if you'd do his voice but...<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Hey why does the BAD guy gotta be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never said the bad guy "has to" be black. (pause) I mean, look at the- the range of villanies, I mean there's black and whites and uh... male females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I noticed that uh- Silvana's also... black lookin'.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just decided to color her black because she was born- she came from outer space from a black egg, which was the- which came out of the rainbow.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah, I was also wonderin' about that like-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I- I- I-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' If Silvana came out of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes it's-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Why would she be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' I mean like black ain't part of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like the black sheep of the family. Y'know you put all the colors together and it does become black.<br /><br />
(unintelligible reactions)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -like a brownish-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) is a (unintelligible) color.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Maybe it's because she's from space and there's not a lot of light in space and it's dark or something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah that- a uh yeah- that's one of the-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hmmm.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhm, did you look at the link of my friend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, ummmm...<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Yeah, since you love blue hair.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh- no I haven't looked at it and I don't wanna make Julie feel jealous if I did- if I went and did.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Julie would mind.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhhh...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You look at pornography don't you?<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' (mumble)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, that- that was two syllables "Rose-chu". You don't- don't add- don't say the "e" it's just "Rosechu".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah you went over this last chat.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>(I don't know, it sounds like "narrator")<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sounds like he says "narrator" again)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh... I was just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, well, obviously the uh- the narrator who did those audio books was incorrect. Specially since I never gave that person the approval to do the audiobooks.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think it's just a fan project and I think he-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' and I think he might have one of the West coast dialects. I know that the South they say y'all but over here-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well obviously he lied-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -different. I'd be proud if they made one of my projects into an audiobook though. That means that there are a lot of fans out there that really like it.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Ay.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' They're not selling to try and make any money off it. They're not trying to rip you off. They always made sure- they always narrate the first page by saying "Christian Weston Chandler" so they're not trying to cheat you or anything.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' The people know you're making it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I- I hear that. I just, apparently they misin- misinterpreted the (audio breaks up) name Rosechu. Or mispronounced it. Misinterpreted, mispronounce- fairly the same thing in that situation... possibly. To answer that question... possibly.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uh, Vivian said that the audiobooks made Sonichu way popular that- than you could ever ever do on your own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I will not disagree with the statement. And I appreciate her help.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris. Would you be offended if a fan wrote a fanfiction about Sonichu?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Faaanfiction... if it's- if it's not demeaning or makes them look stupid. Then it's fine- it's fine. (pause) Like I did mind when, shoot, what's his name? That guy... uhhhh... that guy that the uhhhh... did the animations, on his computer.<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' You did mind or you didn't?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Animations???<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think I know what he's talking about. Are you talking about the um...<br /><br />
<br />
(background noise begins)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' Well the original play was a Greek play. Where they're all y'know... Greeks... and crazy stuff happens and they're all runnin' around in togas. So if you ever wanna see the movie "A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum" it was a classic and it had some real classic people from the 50s and 60s in it. Kinda like "It's a MAD MAD MAD MAD World". Sort of a classic old school movie from funny old school world. First color movie type thing. But that'll be a high school play. You'll wanna see that. You might actually enjoy it. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
(inaudible response)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' You never know that might be fun to do. Well I guess that wouldn't work on the weekend then... you gotta...<br /><br />
<br />
'''(FOR THOSE OF YOU WONDERING WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON, IT APPEARS THAT THERE WAS SOME TECHNICAL PROBLEM THAT CAUSED ANOTHER MUMBLE CHANNEL TO BE RECORDED WHILE THE CONVERSATION WITH CHRIS BECAME BARELY AUDIBLE BACKGROUND NOISE. INSTEAD ALL THAT CAN BE HEARD IS SOME BUTTFACE YAMMERING ABOUT FILMS AND TELEVISION SHOWS. I'M NOT GOING TO KEEP TRANSCRIBING IT. CHRIS IS STILL TALKING AND ANSWERING QUESTIONS, BUT NOTHING CAN BE UNDERSTOOD OVER THESE GUYS.)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''(AT 42.56 THE AUDIO SUDDENLY RESUMES NORMALLY)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Unknown person:''' Uh you-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I uh- noticed he's another BLACK villain.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah in real life he was black. Without meaning any offense to the uh- black guy in general, cause you've noticed, among the Jerkops there's uh- we got black's and white's, males and females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(several people jump in at once)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) -you've never drawn a female officer before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well y'know uhhh... uhhh, comic book number 7, near the end. Near the end of the time travel episode. Uhh, I have no opinion about what Obama's doing cause I don't watch the news.<br /><br />
Accented woman: But you voted for him, didn't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes I voted for him because I saw myself in him when I com- when I saw both the documentaries and downloaded them for the Playstation Network between Obama and McCain. I mean voted for a person I saw more of myself of-<br /><br />
Accented woman: You usually vote for someone based on their political leanings, not how you view them. As I were Republican, I voted for John McCain. Not because I liked him but because I- he had the same political views as me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basi- basically I'm a moderate.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh, I see. Um, I was wondering. I was reading opinions: do you agree with his financial bailouts?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm, I don't even know what it is. So I can't disagree or agree.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Well, to make it short um, it's about uh- the government- President Obama is planning to uh- a new one- (cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You got cut off there.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uhh, ok, we lost him.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yo, Chris, uh, do you, you didn't just vote for Obama cause he was black, did you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I did not vote for him because he was black. I voted for him cause I saw myse- because I saw myself in him. In like, similar lifestyles. And I saw that he was a good man, I mean after all, com- I saw- I saw I watched both of the A&E documentaries, before I can- before I knew who I would vote for.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 45.29)'''<br /><br />
<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris:, Chris what did you see in him that you say in your self?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Like for one thing we were like outcasts, at least one point in our lives.<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Wait, wait hold up earlier you said that you thought he would probably paint the white house black.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh oh that was my father’s joke he said that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Is your father a racist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but you see I drew that for him before I saw the documentaries so respectfully withdrew that comic page.<br /><br />
'''???:''' does your father hate black people.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Not necessarily but it’s just how my father just how my father that does not reflect in any way that’s how he felt (annoying ass noise in the background)<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Man that racist.<br /><br />
'''??? :''' Hey Chris I so the ahh saw the Sonichu and Rosechu love sack that you put up and I thought if was pretty cool for (you adult friends?) I just had a question though: do you have any plans in the comic to have romance between you and one of the hedgehogs I mean-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Yelling) No no no<br /><br />
'''???:''' -we would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' I mean is was just wondering because there are fans how would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Now- now that you answered the his question my kind of relates to his what are your thoughts on inter racial breeding and marriages?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would not agree of disagree with them but in my personal preference I would fell- I would feel more comfortable in having a full relationship with a white woman but I am willing- am still willing to be friends and acquaintances and give and have respect for the black women as well.<br /><br />
'''???:''' What about Asians like Japanese?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I’m ok with them as well (yelling) a once.<br /><br />
'''???:''' So would you get married with a Japanese woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hhhmmmm I would have, yes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> but I’m giving Julie to opportunity here.<br /><br />
'''Clyde:''' Julie’s a lucky woman.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris, I was just wondering, is Silvana gonna become one of the good guys, like- like Black Sonichu did before?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There’s a possibility but I have not given that a co- I have not confirmed that yet.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Uh, is she gonna lose the male sexual parts and become a full-fledged woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhhmmm possibly but I haven’t given that- I haven't given that thought either.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Also um I was reading (?Phillip’s?) question, Chris what did you want to be when you were little?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don’t remember, I do not remember. I’m just making it as I go basically.<br /><br />
'''???:''' is there ever gonna be like uh, an end to your sonichu series like a finale?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hmmmm I don’t know, probably would not.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Oh so it keeps going and going?<br /><br />
???: You ever consider making comic about the history of CWCville?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhmmmm an episode dedicated towards that possibility.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris are you going to keep the name changes that you made or are you going back to the original names?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahhh ya I’m keeping the name changes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' But you know umm Nintendo was umm, y'know, they sent you a letter you never really talk about it further.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but at least- at least- the hel- they use to benefit me for the fact that uh allowed me to fix noting in that sense so I couldn’t be sued by such people in that sense.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 50 min)'''<br /><br />
<br />
(scattered reactions)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So the name changes were good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So uh, Chris I was wondering if uh Mary- Mary Lee Walsh Or I guess the new name: Ryam Sla- I don't know-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Sla-weel.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Slaweel, thank you. Uhm, if she were to use her magic to curse Rosechu with a penis, would Soni- what- wou- would that test the relationship between Sonichu and her? While they were fighting the battle to have it removed, I'm just curious.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... Firstly uh, she does not- she does not have the power ch- to do that.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I just thought you know, remember you did the story about 4-cent-garbage and drawing all the- the picture and-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah you what, that's one- that's one thing: drawing them, but not actually putting them on the character.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Cause I think that would be like an epic story though, like to actually have a quest-<br /><br />
Fan: I'll second that.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -to go to have that penis removed from Rosechu. I mean it's a test of romance between her and Sonichu.<br /><br />
(muttering)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And when that prevails and the penis is removed and everybody- everybody lives happily ever after. Y'know that would be awesome.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnnnnnh, I dunno I have to- I dunno I have to think about that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It is a really good idea. I like it.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I do too.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah, that's good.<br /><br />
Other fan: It could show just how much Rosechu means to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I'll- I'll consider it but I'm not making any promises.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' We understand.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(several talking at once)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -decided on that subject?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm working on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' If you actually decide to go forward with that story? Do you think maybe- maybe you could give her a talking penis?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!!!<br /><br />
(laughter from various people)<br /><br />
(unintelligible responses)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ok, I think- I think we've talked enough about that one guys.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I have a question that doesn't involve penises.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Anyway, my question is since we've been hearing lot of vicious lies and slander about this, could you confirm exactly why you've been fired from your job at Wendy's Chris? Cause we've been hearing all sorts of- of crazy things and we wanna know the truth.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmmmmmm... well, firstly, what have you heard?<br /><br />
'''Other guy:'''Well we heard that uh you... we've heard so many things like you helped a small child and you did a Donald Duck impersonation and you scared the child.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... also that- also that is correct but I did not scare the child. The child was tired, I was only trying ta- I was only trying to make the child feel better. That's a little amusement. But I did not make the child cry, the child was already- was just tired.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' So you didn't help them cut their food and... yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I did help them- help them get their food to- by giving them uhh, by giving them bags and a top for their baked potato boat.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris, when will um, the pictures of Zapina, appear on the um, 18 plus page?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that was a deleted scene! That was a deleted scene.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Why was it deleted?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basically, hhh... y'c- y'cant' really have it if you don't have Rosechu working to take the- working to take the pictures of herself up in the bathroom. Cause like can't have one without the other.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaahhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I don't know if this is a good question but there's something I wonder about that- we kind of have this DVD you made and... y'know, we never unfortunately got... but I'm curious um... do you ever plan to release it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I'd pay money for that, I think everyone else here would probably pay money for it too.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Indeed.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (breaking up) I wanna ask a question.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I hear it's also on YouTube.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris do you know that you've influenced the rap/hip hop community?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmh... uh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I just wanted to mention that because I saw some YouTube videos and it- and- and from some underground hip hop artists such as ??? and they've sampled some of your voice audio complaining about your struggles with uhm... with the school board, with the security guards and they were- they felt so empowered that they actually took those words and mad'em into a very powerful rap song. How does that- how is your reaction to that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhhhh... basically I have not watched those videos so... I don't have an opinion.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I will provide you a link to that, hold on a moment.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh that's ok, actually I uh, did sample one. The one where they basically played the parody from "Can't touch this".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, no, see it's waaay more serious than that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I still haven't heard of- heard of what you're talking about.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Nevermind.<br /><br />
(rustling and moving noises)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do an impression of MC Hammer?<br /><br />
(more clicking and rustling)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Can't touch this do do do doo do dooo Can't touch this! Do do do dooo do do do... can't touch this.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' That was- heheheh.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Awesome.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you- can you do Dr. Nick Riviera from the Simpsons?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> HIIII EVERYBODY!<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hello Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hi Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hi Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that should say Dr. Nick cause that's who I'm imitatin'.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''???:''' That uh-<br /><br />
'''???:''' HELLOOO EV'RYBODY!!!!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well that-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hi Dr. Nick!<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Thank you, I love the Simpsons.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do... Peter from Family Guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhenhenhenh... Hey Lois! Look at me! I'm just (unclear) you nose, and I'm eatin' your nose.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh that's dead on.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Oh would you- Omicron's been interested in tis- would you actually make a documentary like- like your other DVD but make your daily life?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... I'm... yeah I might but uh... I'm not su- I'm not sure bout it at the moment.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaaaaaaanh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris can you do Mario? You know from Super Mario?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hay paisano! How you doin' mistah hedgehog!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's very good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then Sonic- then Sonic would say "what?!?"<br /><br />
(giggling)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris do you have any plans to make a video of yourself taking a dump on a Hexbox?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No! That's gross.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Yeah that was pretty sick right there.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Let's ban him.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's bad enough I cut in half with an axe.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> and one of the elevator jokes...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Oh we remember that, that was a classic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And I earned a trophy for that.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmm...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Yeah, I remember that, it was destroying a Hexbox by cutting it in half if I remember...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' If I were to draw nude Zapina fanart, uhm, would you put them on the site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... uhh, your- you uh- free to draw them at your- at your own- own preference, but I will not be- I will not put it on the website because- cause- because I will not want to break any laws of having underage portrayals- portrayals of underage nudity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Isn't Dot a child?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry... what?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dot, from Animaniacs.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' So-uh- uhm- I think I looked up somewhere that um, drawings do not count, they're just lines on paper not like real pictures that are horrible.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah I believe-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Draw-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (cut off)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Those illustrations do not count as child pornography. Because with drawing it's art- it's artistic merit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Welll... I dunno, I guess it depends I have to- but- y'know you could do the drawing and I'll think- I'll consider it.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, would it be possible to get any pictures of Sonichu having anal sex with Rosechu?<br /><br />
(pause... thumps and feedback)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm considering that but...<br /><br />
'''Accented woman''' Who keeps letting this person in? You are very offensive.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -and and, if you draw those, do you think that Rosechu would actually clean Sonichu's penis off with her mouth (laugh) w-when they're done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nah, no, I don't think so, I think- I think- I think it would be unh- yeah w-wash it off with a washcloth.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Do you think in, at that point then they would sell the washcloth on EBay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!<br /><br />
(people talking over each other)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, no, no more party humor, all right?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah alright, okay<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Unrelated to party humor, I want to ask that in your Springbreak uhh Issue of Sonichu you had an introduction of a, of new character, the [[Yawning Squirtle|squirtle]] and I wanna ask<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:''' (interrupting)</span> No, that's, no, no, no, that's not just a character, I was, I was not introducing a new character, I was just doing like a poster thing for a bubble speak under one, I thought I just draw some water type pokemon un-in there<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I understand but the thing is there is huge cult following for that character and I strongly suggest that you should capalize on that and, and make him to a main character<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eh... No, I don't think so<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's just sleeping Squirtle work waking up<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, people just thought he was really cute and yawning Squirtle, I don't know, I heard someone say, man wouldn't it be great if he would be that [[Autistic|dopey]] sidekick that he'd come and they'd be like, like, he'd come in and say something silly after someone did something and they would be like Squirtle!<br /><br />
People laughing and talking over each other<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Ehm...<br /><br />
???: Yo, it makes you *unintelligible* (Chris and someone talk over another)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yes Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I'm asking you about... Hm... Never mind, I lost my train of thought. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's okay. These guys made me lose a train of thought as well. Doesn't multiple inputs.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yes, kinda lotta control here. I may have to... never mind<br /><br />
Silence<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I never lose my train of thought because I have a GPS tracking system on it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, that was a good joke. (chuckle)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, could you tell us a joke right now. Just any joke.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay, here is a fuck - here is a funny ...here is a funny mind scream. Funny rhyme scheme - not to be taken literally:<br /><br />
On your Game Boy Advance SP<br /><br />
create cher ME<br /><br />
den play da WII<br /><br />
with your PSP<br /><br />
hooked to your PS3<br /><br />
cause it's fun<br /><br />
see?<br /><br />
And never ff, and never play a [[Hex Box]] 360<br /><br />
Because it's stupid and you're not a dummy (in childlike voice)<br /><br />
Mock laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Is that something you made up?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I made that up<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Chris, Chris, can I write that down and tribute to quote you that? Oh man, that's good<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) So you mean to type it up and you quote me on the rhyme scheme?<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Yeah, I'd like that. I've been thinking about making a quote book like a mini Chris quote book like something you could open and have a cool line to say when you're on a party and you're like right things<br /><br />
People talking over Chris and Alucard<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, well I'm typing it up for Alucard, so...<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Thank you<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span>Chris, can we hear one more?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Here is an [[Christian's sex joke|adult joke]] I once come up<br /><br />
'''Fan''': This is going to be good!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There was this married couple, Bob and Jane, and they have been looking forward to having children. So, one night, Bob comes home from work, and Jane says, "Hi, you had a good day, dear?" And he says, "Nah, I felt alone, darling" And she said, "Well, it's okay, why don't we go upstairs, and we'll have some Breakfast." "Breakfast, at Nine p.m.?" And she says, "Sure, you bring the MILK, and I'll get an EGG."<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yo, I heard that before, man<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then later, they had a boy and a girl, Junior Bacon and Orange Juice. All Part of a Balanced Breakfast.<br /><br />
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif]]<br /><br />
Perplexed silence<br />
<br />
'''Fan''': Hey, Chris, how do you solve a Mexican tank?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Stand in front of it?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': No, man, shoot the guys pushing at it<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fans''': Oh that's a good one<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' I got one<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get a bunch of [[Niggos|blacks]] in a car?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Throw some chicken in.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get them out of the car?<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Job application<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What do you call a beach of black people buried up to their necks?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Afro-turf.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I came up with one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what's the difference between a black man and a pizza?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': A pizza can feed a family of four.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': How do you stop black people from jumping on a bed?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, enough racist jokes.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''':Put velcro on the ceiling.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enough, enough black jokes.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, uh Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Sorry<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I showed by friend that over 18 site, and he said, that he um, he um, you know he, he masturbated to it. Does that make you feel (interrupted)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's good, that's basically the reaction I would be going for. Among the male ca... among the male population, being attracted to the women.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But those are your drawings, it's like, I think he's gay now. I mean, you're a guy and you drew those.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm drawing, I'm drawing female characters.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yah, but it's drawn by you and you're, like, I don't know. It's kind of awkward for me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris, I actually need to thank you, the pictures on that site, it looked like the camera was inside Sonichu's penis when Rosechu was giving him a blowjob. That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. I've always wanted to have a camera in my penis so that I could see that if I ever got a blowjob, that would be awesome, I just wanted to say thank you very much for that perspective. It's the first time I've ever seen it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': There's a question here on the site, oh sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, well I see it... no I don't basically masturbate to my own drawings.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But you're okay if other people do, right? Even guys?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You're okay if other people, you know, masturbate to your drawings? Even if they're guys, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If the guys are masturbating to the female drawings, then yes, that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I just thought it was kind of awkward, but maybe I'm seeing it a different way.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I doubt that, uh, having a whole bunch of drawings of naked female characters can be misinterpreted as something else.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': I want to ask you a question.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': One time, a friend and I were looking at porn together, and we masturbated together, but the porn was straight, ordinary porn. Is this gay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I'm sorry, where you looking at naked women?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Yes, but we were in the same room, masturbating.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, if you both were thinking about the naked women you were looking at, then I would definitely say you both are straight, cuss you're not thinking about each other, you're thinking about the women.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Right. <br /><br />
'''Fan''': Would you do that with someone?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': I'm relieved.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Man, nigger you gay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Shut up. Would you do that with someone? Like a guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Nah, I'm straight dog.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I'd, yeah I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Omnicron has a question on here, on the side here.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You see it, or?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. That's not straight.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what about the earlier question.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, the one before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, which one before? Oh, you mean...<br /><br />
(All talk at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, what do you think about.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wait, wait let him answer.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Let him answer that one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was gonna rephrase it but okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'd say it would depend on your interpretation, what is adultery to you?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But, you know, isn't the Bible only supposed to be interpreted, it's the word of God, you're not really supposed to interpret it any other way.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': It is what it is.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's in English.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh, I have no comment.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, that's what my, uh, you know I was talking about my mom saw those drawings. I mean, not the drawings, the posters, the playboy posters and that's basically what she got bad about. She said I was committing adultery.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah okay, if you don't want to talk about it, fine.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, hmmm, I think you shou, I think you should, uh, when you, I think I can see where this could be interpreted one way or another, it depends on how you look at the woman. I mean, alright, you're looking at the, uh woman, you might be imaginin' her naked, but, I mean, you would respe, I mean, you would, you would still respect, I mean, if you were still respecting that woman, you would appreciate her more for like who she was aside or in addition to the (something), that's not as bad as just, as just only doing it for the appearance.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's why, uh, that's why the playboy magazines, they give you the introductions of the women. It's like letting you know who they are (unintelligible).<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, but there weren't any, uh, descriptions under the, yeah never mind.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Thank you for the clarification Chris.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris, do you love America?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm patriotic.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's good. I was wondering if you could sing the national anthem for us?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [[Wikipedia:My Country, 'Tis of Thee| My country tis' of thee. Sweet land of liberty. Of thee, of thee I sing.]] I don't remember the rest.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Lands where my fathers died.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Land of the pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
(Fans all start singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Stop it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey I'll, I'll tell y'all a funny joke that's kind of patriotic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, you got this, you got this funny, you got this funny Mexican guy, and he just, he just come back home to Meh-he-co after an American visit. He's like (high pitched voice) Oh the people there are so very friendly. I mean, I go to the basketball game. I sit in the back row. I sit in the back row. And then, and then, and then all of, and then all of the sudden right before the game started, everyone turned around, put their hands on their chests, and they say, "Oh say can you seeeeee"<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I thought you said no racist jokes?<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': Yeah man, that ain't cool!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was a name, it was a name joke.<br /><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''':...Spanish language<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm kind of offended by that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': That's racist dog. That ain't cool.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': You laugh you support terrorism.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, what?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What'd you say?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What the hell? Who said that?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Forget it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I said, you laugh, you support terrorism.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, he's gone.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Awful Mr. T impression) I pity the fool, who try and misinterpret things, and try and jam new words into my mouth.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You do a good Mr. T<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah you do.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) no jibber jabber.<br /><br />
(Fans laugh)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, did you watch the A-team back in the day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No but, no but, basica, but I have seen Mr. T. And then I also, I also saw when he guest starred in an episode of Alvin and the Chipmunks.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I saw that episode, he helped uh Theodore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Theodore was getting picked on.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, you posted a link here.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well at my [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|Methodist church]], uh, sex before marriage is okay as long as, uh, she and I, we love each other very much and truly.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But that's what they tell you, I'm talking about the word of God.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *Sigh* Okay, I'm getting tired, okay, I'm getting tired here, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, but...<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, sorry, no more of that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, you're right. Please stay Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay. Alright, I'll stay a little while longer.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, if anyone does, if anyone asks anything that makes him feel uncomfortable, I'm gonna kick you out of the room.<br /><br />
(Everyone speaks)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I have a Japanese friend, he's, he's actually 26 and he's never had a girlfriend and we asked him some questions, just joking around one day. And we asked him if his, when he gets married, if his wife wanted to sleep with another man, would he be okay with it, and he actually said yes, as long as she wasn't being forced. Now that kind of bothered us, because us Americans, right, we think that marriage, and you know you're with somebody, they should be faithful, but he doesn't seem to think so, so I wanted to see if you had any advice maybe on what we could do to try and convince him that his viewpoint is wrong.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, hmm, it's not necessarily that the viewpoint is wrong. See, the thing is, what, to, to quote, to make it accepta, to make it like as if you're actually cheating on somebody, cheating on your spouse in the marriage, it's like not telling them, not telling him, not telling him or her about it beforehand, but it's like, you know, you, it's like you tell them beforehand and you get their approval, it's, it's okay, even if they don't want to be part of it. But not telling them, that's definitely like cheating on them.<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that's another thing I would have to think about, cuss got a bit of a, couple of items of destruction(?) that need to be repaired<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I just got, I just talked to that one friend I was talking about who, uh, saw your website, the 18 one, and it turns out he's, he's gay, he's actually gay and he fapped, uh I mean he masturbated to, uh, Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hahaha, your friend's a fag.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': And I think he's...<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out for 15 seconds)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ...about that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I think in case you would definitely want to let him know that you are straight and you don't want that kind of relationship, and maybe, and you know<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I tell him just to get the hell away from your site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm not saying that, but like, uh, you know, you don't want that kind, you don't, I mean that's, that's basically confirmed on that note. So, uh, you want, you still wanna be friends but you don't, but you're not into that kind of thing.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I mean, he was looking at your site, like, the 18 site and he was in like, um,<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Over 18.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': The over 18 site you made. The loveshack. I thought he was just like, you know, masturbating to Rosechu, but it turns out he was attracted to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *sigh* Uhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, I don't think I'll be friends with this guy anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, yeah, then tell him, yeah, to get the hell out of your house and stay away if you don't want to be friends anymore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Seems like you know too many gay friends mister.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh shut up.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris, you know how cologne or perfume, you know, women wear that to try and attract men? Do you think that farts attract gay guys to each other?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Now that's stupid! Not only is that stupid, but it's gross.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Here, I'm gonna take that question and I'm gonna, I'm gonna take that question and spin that into something that's less weird. What would you say the best cologne or whatever a guy could wear to get a girl's attention?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I recommend [[Axe|Axe]] body spray.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh yeah? I think I tried that one time.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': That actually does it for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What scent do you use?<br /><br />
(All speak)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Don't you use ass body spray?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Mmm, love it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Does the Axe effect, does it really exist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Does Axe exist?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, the Axe effect. You know, they say in the commercials spray it and girls will come to you.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) and it works for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Has it worked for you Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, well, yeah, I, yeah I haven't got that working for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I think it's a scam personally.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I mean... I mean, Old Spice is pretty good. I had, I had like a couple of girls go up to me asking me for dates with Old Spice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I actually wore that Orion sent, uhh, still smelling it. So it will work Chris, you just gotta give it time.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Using the Axe.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Cameron but, isn't Axe spray for men?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': No no no no no no no, see, see I said a boyfriend, a boyfriend that I met.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, okay.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah. *laughs*<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Perfect sense.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, silly, silly. I have a question for you Chris, what celebrities have you met?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Well what I'm saying is the Axe effect doesn't work. Okay, sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't actually met any celebrities in person, my real life, unless you count a local radio DJ.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I've met the DJ of my radio station 95.1 and [[Excel Saga|Monica Rial]], and meeting Monica Rial was just a treat.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ahhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was, it was good.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, she's pretty.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Maybe you should go to her and, um, maybe she could be like a contact for voice acting. I mean, you do pretty good imitations.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Do Homer Simpson!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Homer Simpson impression) Oh, look at me! I'm a stupid old person, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp, D'OH!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That was awesome<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Who else can you do Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What other imitations can you do?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, a lot. It depends on if you name it, I might recall, if you name the person or character I'll, if I can recall my memory than I will imitate that person.<br /><br />
<br />
(transcribing end for now at 1:23:00)<br /><br />
<br />
<br />
{{Transcription}}<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 6|Mumble Chat 6]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 8|Mumble Chat 8]]|}}<br />
<br />
==Links==<br />
* [https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBWklfakp0TGdDSkU Download]<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
<br />
[[Christian's sex joke]] - Used during this chat.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_7&diff=163077Mumble 72012-09-27T20:26:02Z<p>Irisviel: </p>
<hr />
<div>'''Mumble 7''' is the seventh of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]], held on 13 [[February 2009]].<br />
<br />
Appears to be the genesis for the "Power" videos in which Chris attempts and fails to prove his [[I AM STRONG|strength]] and [[CWC Fighter|fighting]] [[Challenge For Clyde|skill]], though these would not materialize for several months.<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
* A fan talks to Chris about putting naked posters of girls and pictures of men up in his room up to find out if his friend was a [[homo]] as Chris suggested. He tells Chris that his girlfriend dumped him over the posters and his friend ignored all of them. Chris sees nothing wrong with his advice until Julie tells him that she wouldn't like that. Chris recommends sending an anonymous letter explaining the situation and utterly fails to apologize or show concern.<br />
* Fans point out that Chris shouldn't have to show and prove that he is straight.<br />
* Chris cuts a fan off to let Julie ask a question involving [[pedofork|shota]].<br />
* Fans ask Chris to turn his radio down.<br />
* Chris uses Wal-Mart printer paper & RSVP ballpoint pen to draw, and a 50-pack of Crayola markers to color. Refuses to use color pencils or Photoshop to color, saying he prefers the markers.<br />
* Chris talks about Omicron's redone version of [[Sonichu]], accusing him of plagiarism. Says that the difference between what Omicron is doing and what he is doing is that Sonichu is his. Agrees to let Omicron continue if he credits Chris with the copyright.<br />
* '''Julie is convincing Chris to make videos proving to Clyde how strong he is.''' Chris feels that the [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|dildo breaking video]] proved this. Fans say that Chris's dildo comes apart naturally for cleaning.<br />
* '''A fan recommends making a video showing off his fighting moves to scare Clyde.'''<br />
* Chris is asked why he would use a dildo in proving that he is straight. Chris says that he is straight for crushing it, fans call him a [[homo]] for keeping it.<br />
* Chris [[lie|denies]] [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|using the dildo]], and claims that it's now broken. Fan says it could easily be reassembled. Chris is adamant that it was glued and that it took a lot of strength to pull it apart.<br />
* When asked by Julie, '''Chris admits using super-shears from Cutco to break the dildo glue, claiming to use a lot of strength in the process'''.<br />
* Fans discuss [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]]. Chris insists that it was drawn in protest of [[ED]]. He says it was anonymous, as most women have long brown hair and her eyes were censored.<br />
* Insists that [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:AngelicainGod%27sEyes.JPG the Rule 34 of Angelica Rosechu] is masturbating and enjoying it, and is using her hand to do it.<br />
* Chris thinks Billy Mays is on Home Improvement.<br />
* Chris isn't doing anything on Valentine's Day, as Julie is not there yet.<br />
* Chris discusses the the No-Redheads policy in his [[Love Quest]]. Says that redheads don't attract him unless they are not natural redheads. No piercings or tattoos allowed.<br />
* Chris is OK with blue hair.<br />
* Does a terrible Marge Simpson impersonation.<br />
* Chris impersonates Comic Book Guy and Donald Duck.<br />
* A fan presents the possibility that AIDS was sent by God to kill the [[homos]].<br />
* [[Chris and Religion|Premarital sex being forbidden in Christianity]] is discussed. Chris fumbles for an explanation.<br />
* '''A fan pretending to be black says he believes the government made AIDS to get rid of black people. Chris says that that's the kind of thing a black guy would say'''.<br />
* Premarital sex comes up again. Chris compares it to using porn to practice and learn skills for later.<br />
* The fake black fan calls Chris on his comment from earlier about black guys and AIDS. He makes the excuse that someone else said it first.<br />
* Questions on Sonichu start. Sonichu doesn't wear clothes because it's a comic. Chris isn't sure how [[Blake]] sounds. He might sound black, he might sound like Shadow the Hedgehog. The fake black fan asks why the bad guy has to be black, also mentioning [[Silvana]]. Chris says that he doesn't have to be.<br />
* Chris gets annoyed about the pronunciation of [[Rosechu]] as popularized by the Old Narrator of the [[Audiobooks]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't disagree that the Audiobooks made Sonichu more popular that he ever did'''.<br />
* He doesn't mind fanfics that don't portray Sonichu in a bad light.<br />
* The audio goes low in the main chat and a fan has a private, unrelated conversation for a few minutes.<br />
* Audio comes back as Chris is admitting that the [[B-Manajerk]] was black in real life.<br />
* Chris doesn't watch the news, so doesn't have an opinion on [[Barack Obama|Obama]]. He voted for him because he saw a documentary where he saw more of himself in Obama, namely that he was an outcast at one point.<br />
* A fan says that you should vote based on politics, not personality. Chris says that he is a moderate.<br />
* Chris doesn't know what the financial bailout is. He says that he drew the [[Sonichu 8#The Elevator Gags|racist picture]] of Obama based on his father's joke, before he saw the documentaries that made him vote.<br />
* Chris will not agree or disagree with interracial dating/marriage. He would want a white woman, but he would be [[gal pals|friends]] with others.<br />
* He'd marry an Asian.<br />
* It's not yet known if Silvana will be a good guy or if she will lose her [[pickle|dick]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't know what he wanted to be when he was younger, he's just making it up as he goes along'''.<br />
* '''Chris is keeping the name changes in the comics for legal reasons'''.<br />
* A fan suggests Slaweel cursing Rosechu to have a dick. Chris gets upset before saying that he'll think about it. The fans think it's a great idea. One considers a talking penis for Rosechu. Chris says it's a stupid idea.<br />
* Another fan asks about Chris being sacked from Wendy's. He denies scaring the child with his Donald Duck impersonation, saying that he didn't make him cry.<br />
* Chris might release his DVD one day.<br />
* A fan says that Chris has influenced underground rappers such as Immortal Technique, who has sampled him.<br />
* Chris takes requests. Impersonates MC Hammer, Dr Nick Riviera, Peter from [[Family Guy]], Mario and Sonic, butchering them all and tainting our childhood memories.<br />
* More Sonichu questions. '''Chris won't upload [[Zapina]] [[Rule 34]] because she is underage and Chris is worried about legal ramifications'''. When he is reassured that this would be legal, he says he would consider it. He will also consider Sonichu-Rosechu anal sex. Rosechu would not clean the [[pickle]] with her mouth, she would clean it off with a washcloth. He would not sell the the washcloth on EBay.<br />
* Chris calls a stop to the potty humor displayed throughout the Sonichu questions.<br />
* '''Chris denies that [[Yawning Squirtle]] is a character'''.<br />
* Fans ask for a joke. He recites a dreadful rhyme about Videogame consoles. He then tells his awful [[Christian's sex joke|sex joke]]. Fans start to tell racist jokes about [[niggos|black people]] and Mexicans. Chris calls for a stop to this.<br />
* A fan says that his friend [[mass debating|masturbated]] to the [[rule 34|adult section of Sonichu]] and is now worried that his friend is a [[homo]], as they were drawn by a man. '''Chris says that this is what he intended it for''', and they are drawings of women, so his friend is straight. He doesn't masturbate to his own drawings.<br />
* Chris reassures a fan that [[Mass Debating|masturbating]] in the same room as another man isn't gay as long as both men are thinking of women, but he would not do this.<br />
* Chris offers no comment as to what constitutes adultery.<br />
* Chris says that he is patriotic. Asked to sing the national anthem, he instead mangles a few lines of "My Country, 'Tis of Thee". He then tells a 'patriotic' joke that is insensitive to Mexicans. [[Chris and Hypocrisy|The fans call him on his "no more racist jokes" statement from earlier]].<br />
* Chris does a poor impersonation of Mr T.<br />
* Chris says that if you are married, sleeping with someone else isn't cheating if you have consent from your spouse.<br />
* Chris gives more advice on homos and recommends Axe body spray for attracting girls.<br />
* Chris has not met any celebrities, only local DJs.<br />
* Does impersonations of Homer Simpson and Bender. The two sound identical.<br />
* Chris gives dating advice: Stay calm, polite, friendly and don't let your nerves get the best of you. Say "Hello, how are you" and talk about yourself. '''[[Barbara|His mom]] told him that standing around with a sign makes him look retarded. A female fan cracks up laughing and can't stop'''.<br />
* "Those who can't, teach"<br />
* Chris says he has never even been on a date. Rejects dating suggestions from fans.<br />
* '''Chris was close with Sarah "[[PandaHalo]]" McKenzie, but hasn't heard from her in over two weeks. He heard about the fires and doesn't know if she's still alive. When a fan adds that 108 people were killed in the fires, Chris responds to the entire ordeal with [[Chris and death|"It's OK though, at least I have a good woman who's willing to be by my side at this point"]]'''.<br />
* When pushed, he says he feels remorse for the the victims of the fires and is concerned that [[Sarah Cassandra McKenzie|Panda]] is dead.<br />
* He asserts that he didn't abandon Sarah for [[Julie]].<br />
* '''A fan says that if [[PandaHalo|Sarah]] isn't alive, Chris should take solace that her perfectly barbecued remains fed the survivors. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|SHUT UP!!!]]'''<br />
* Chris says that he cares about Sarah and Julie equally and wouldn't dump Julie as a friend. A fan asks what he will do to the survivors who ate Sarah. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|"SHUT UP!!!"]] and demands that he be booted.<br />
* Fans reassure Chris that Sarah is probably OK.<br />
* Chris does abominable impersonations of Uncle Ruckus from The Boondocks and Hank Hill. '''He sings "Don't Trust Them New [[Niggos|Niggas]] Over There"'''. He also impersonates Meowth and sings the Team Rocket song.<br />
* [[Clyde]] enters. Chris refuses to answer questions and leaves.<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
===Chris proves he is straight===<br />
'''Guy:''' Chris!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all! ''[echoes]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'll be damned.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh, Chris-[gets cut off by another guy]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh you know, can't com- it's uh, can't complain.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' How's construction of the site?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' [unintelligible] so Chris<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I...I need to ask you something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yup?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh... I put those posters, of the... Playboy and everything in my room, and uh, one of my girlfriends saw it, and she got mad at me for looking at other w-... other girls, and she broke up with me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh... I'm sorry to hear that. It could-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, she's calling me a pervert. I-I don't understand this.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Did you... did you ex- did you try to explain to her about situation between you and that guy?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I... I did, and I don't think she understood.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... well, you should try, you should, uh, s-... try, uh, you should try wr-, you should tr-, uh, do you know her email address?<br /><br />
[pause]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So, uh Chris-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' A-also, wait... also, uh, the friend, I was talking about, he, uh, visited, and [typing noises] he, uh, he went into my room, and didn't even notice the posters. He just s-sat in the middle, he didn't s...sit in any uh, part of the room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Huh. Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, uh... so, yeah, I don't know. I mean, my girlfriend broke up with me, called me a pervert, said that I shouldn't be looking at other girls, I mean... I don't know what to do now.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well listen, uh, answer my question, do you have her email address?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Umm... yeah, but she won't... she won't answer me anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm... ok, hmm. Here's what you can do, uh... Do you know your girlfriend's... any of your girlfriend's [[Gal pal|gal-pals]]?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm... well, you should try to... like wr- you should write out... hmm... hmm... here's an idea. S- Write a letter to her and send it via smail mai-, via snail mail, but don't write the return address. On it.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What should I write?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just like, you know, like, they, you know, this is... you know, this is... you, uh, you put your name there, and you, it's, and then you would basically explain the situation between you and that guy, and that's why you had the posters up, well that's why you put the posters up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't really understand what was the point of the posters in the first place?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[sigh]'' it's... ''[sigh]'' if he looks at... if he, if he is very interested, if he is, if he was straight, he would uh, look at the women. Very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But he didn't even notice them. He didn't notice any of the posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, then I guess he is a [[Homos|homo]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' W...well, um, he wasn't looking at anything, not even the guy posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Hmm... He's not blind, surely.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, like, what is he, is he like, uh...I don't know.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I don't know either, man. But, you know at the moment I would suggest you, uh, write the- write the letter to your girlfriend, send the mail, don't write your return address on the envelope, and, uh, mail it to her.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Also my mom saw the posters and she got offended, she's like really religious and st- she said that like, uh, you know, lust is a sin or some shit. Oh, like she said, she's like all against the, the uhh, the like, Playboy in my room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, your- apparently your mom hasn't been [beeps] that open minded that time. So, you know, give her time to reh-cover, she'll uh, she might op- she might open up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I don't think that was a good idea though, I mean, w-why did-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -you suggest it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I was trying to see if he, to, I was trying to s-help you figure out if your uh, if your friend was a homo or not.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I know, but, do you have uh, [Fans talking] Playboy posters in your room?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unclear] I'm very forward.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I have uh, poster of some, of uh, I have a poster in my room of uh, some uh, naked girls I got from adamandeve.com as a bonus.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Then, nobody says anything about it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[clears throat]'' Well, I didn't really have too many oppor- too many people in my room. So, it's kind of like in a hard to notice place.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Um, wondering, um, If you showed anyone, wouldn't they be offended?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe, maybe not, [Fan grunts] it just depends on their point of view.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I wouldn't want the same thing that happened to me to happen to you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I hear you there. Uh, just to so just sound clear... Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie, are you there?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ok, uh, would you be offended if you saw such a poster in my room?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''[breaks up]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, What will, what was that? [Echoes]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie'''</span> Yes I would, kind of.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well that's no problem, I can take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, see that's what I'm talking about, I mean...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, that's why I asked Julie right now, because I respect her. So, because she said that she would, I will take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I've been thinking, um...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you have... [unclear] Chris, I don't think you should look at other woman.[sic] In my opinion.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I see, Julie. Well that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I...I respect that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' She might get jealous, I mean, that's what happened to my...my girlfriend.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, that's fine Julie, I respect your, I respect that. Just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey, can I ask you a question? If uh, he's done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, uh, one more thing, um, you know I've been thinking, uh, I don't really think you need, you know, posters and stuff like,<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' to prove you're straight, I mean, if you're straight, that's all there is to it i-if, am I right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think you're right.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I...I mean, you shouldn't have to prove that you're straight.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> You're right.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I m-mean [line breaks temporarily] Y-you shouldn't have to reassure yours-self. You should just be knowing it, and nothing anybody says, should get very, uh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, it's ve-ah-very-but you see, I have like, I have that [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] in my room, it's just, so that like, you know, for in case I have any-for in case I have any random thoughts, on account really, to tempt me.<br /><br />
''[unintelligible mix of chatter from most participants trying to get their word in]''<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I mean, even if they're random thoughts, even if they're random thoughts, if you know you're ''positive'' about it, you shouldn't have to look at anything to make sure.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, usually.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay. Uh, moving on from all this homosexuality, uh, I have one question, uh- [gets cut off by Chris in the background] ...never mind, [fat douchebag?]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey, ah, let Julie ask a question, let Julie ask her question.<br /><br />
<br />
===7:08 Julie asks about shotacon===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, I was watching you on the Internet yesterday and, what's a shotacon?[slightly cut off]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...I'm sorry, uh-y, I'm sorry, you got cut off, what was that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> What's a sho-[cuts off again]-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...What's a...''short''?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Shot-[cuts off third time, pretty obvious she's saying ''shota'']-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dude, shota.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, shota.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ssshhhh...shota?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, S-H-O-A-T-A [sic].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, it's a word he found online.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, [baby?], yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never heard of that word.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I dunno, if you want to look it up, you can probably find out on an online dictionary...<br /><br />
''[pause, and a weary sigh from someone other than Chris]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'll-I'll take a look. Hang on.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I know some Japanese and I think I've heard that somewhere, like in a magazine or something.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, it's some of that Japanese shit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Probably is. Three moments, I'll look it up.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Okay!<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's radio is audible]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Whoops, that was the wrong one. The wrong bookmark.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' S-H-O-T-A.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I know, I just get the wrong bookmark for...place I wi-for like...dictionary-type website that I have.<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's keyboard taps are audible]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uhhh...Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, now that Julie's done with her question, I also had one.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' He has to find what that means first.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, ''I'm sorry''.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Shit, ah shit, I've just found it on Wikipedia. It's, uh, it's a ma-it's a Japanese name. It's a name of a person. In Japan.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Really.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a Japanese name. I think it's-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh no no, I think you're looking at the wrong thing, it's S- S-H-O-T-A-C-O-N.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> S-H- I mean- O-T-A-C-O-N? Shotacon?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's the same thing, just put C-O-N at the end.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I've read it in a dictionary before, can't remember what it means...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, oh! Okay, here it is, uh..."shotacon, sometimes shortened to shota, is Japanese slang of the phrase 'Shotaro Complex'"...uh..."that describes the attraction to young boys or an individual with such an attraction".<br /><br />
''[Disgusted reactions heard]''<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh my god, what the fuck?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' There's lots of sick people. Y'all are gonna get ricked?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Someone from 4 cent garbage came in and told us to look that up, I didn't-I didn't even want to.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess he's a homo...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Don't worry I banned him already.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Um, Chris, Vivian wants to know if you can like, turn your radio down a bit, it's distracting.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yes, please turn it down.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I thought that was quiet enough, here.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, no, the lady'll probably pick it up<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Alright cool. Merci.<br /><br />
<br />
===10:21 Another fan asks about art supplies===<br />
<br />
'''Another Fan:''' Okay, um, I have a question, um, I like to draw—interrupted by mumbling—I like to draw comics and such, I mean I want to start up a webcomic. What kind of materials do you use?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, like, you mean for drawing?<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well mostly I just use like, uh, paper without lines, like, computer printer paper you can get in, like, Wal-Mart, for an inexpensive price in multiples.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then I use like an RES—RSVP-brand pen with the black ink.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh okay, is it like, um, a gel pen or a ballpoint pen or-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like a ballpoint, it's like a ballpoint pen.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What do you use to color?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I use Crayola brand markers.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would like to—I would—I would—I would recommend getting the Super Tip 50-pack which you can also find at the Wal-Mart.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay. I-[interrupted by someone else on chat]<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's basically-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' At Wal-Mart I usually get the 24-color RoseArts. Those are—those do pretty good too.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhh, Vivian, just so you—just so you know, I'm using the microphone that came with Hey You, Pikachu for Nintendo Sisty-Four [sic].<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, yeah no, no offense, but uh, personally I prefer like, colored pencils and shit cause-[Chris mumbling is heard]-they're like easier to erase. Photoshop [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If you want to use colored pencils that's fine, I'm not, uh, saying that you have to use Crayola markers-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why don't you use colored pencils? They're really good, you should try one on like, at least one page, just try one. One page with just colored pencils.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But um, actually, you can—you can scan your drawings and then color—color them in like, Photoshop or something. [rest of chat murmurs in agreement] That looks really professional, and really good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I prefer using the markers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's just that I-I mean—I mean I've tried—I mean I've colored with colored pencils before, and I just feel best with using markers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I have a question, um, uh, the Hey You Pikachu microphone, how does that work on the, you're using that on your computer? Did you say?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah it's just, yeah, it's like you plug it into uh, into the basic microphone jack.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh, yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Excuse me, I have a nice little Plantronics headset.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Hey Chris can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah, hang on a second, uh... uh, Omicron, that's uh, you're basically, uh, you're basically plagiarizing here. You're even using, uh, parts of my original drawings to, uh, make up your so called real ones and, you're just—you're just parroting—you're just plagiarizing-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's dirty and illegal.<br /><br />
[Unintelligible mumbling]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, you said so yourself, you're being illegal. And plus, and plus I'm-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, isn't combining Sonic with Pikachu the same thing?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, but, but but also, look at this, also I'm looking at this site here, it said, he's claiming the copyright for himself, but he's, but he's not. I mean that's like, but he's, he—he says<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' You need to ban him immediately.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, ban him immediately.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh wait wait wait wait wait...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah maybe you should check-[interrupted by loud noise, probably Chris]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well he said that, he's saying that all of Sonichu material is copyrighted by him, when it's clearly not.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah but you use Sonic and Pikachu, and you copyrighted it-<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' He just offered to give you credit-[interrupted by noisy chatter]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean, I put, I mean, yeah but, I mean, I'm talking about the—the Omnicron [sic] guy here, that's like, just put this link here.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh he offered to give you credit-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes that's the same thing you did.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well no no, he, no-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We decided-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No he's plagiarizing MY Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We just decided [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris it's, it's a parody, kinda like Sonichu is.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but he—yeah, but he's saying, he said—he—on his front page he says, all Sonichu material-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah but he's, he just offered to change it, so are you okay with that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> By changing it to Sonichu X-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, he said he'll give you credit instead of claiming it for himself.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, uh, yeah I would appreciate that, that would be better, yeah, if... he changed that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Alright cool.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Problem solved.<br /><br />
<br />
===15:02 Chris talks about dildos to prove his strength===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes Julie.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you think you could tell everyone about my idea? And, since you're going to do it do you think you could tell everyone so they could look out for it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, your idea... um, oh oh oh, yeah, just basically a video of me standing up to Clyde and showing him how strong I am, doin' a few kicks for the camera or something-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, you should throw some punches, show him what you're made of, you know?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Kick, punch, it's all in the mind ''etc.''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I basically... I pretty much did that when I...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Let him talk, c'mon!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I pretty much did - already proved my strength when I... ripped that... ''dildo'' in half.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Foreign-Sounding Guy:''' Most dildos come apart for cleaning.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' C'mon.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but that thing was screwed together at the seam.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok listen to me...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris...<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' Eh Chris!<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ...could you do a like further test of your strength for me?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''stress sigh'' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I wanna see how strong you are please.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...That's fine, I can do that.<br /><br />
'''Other Fan:''' I mean that's ok, you showed your strength, but you should show her your moves. Like show her, like, what kind of moves you can do.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, let me tell you a story about how this'll work, ok.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' See, my, uh, one of my cousins, uh, this guy at school, kept, y'know, picking on him, calling him gay and stuff, and trying to fight with him, and my cousin told him to sss- y'know, one day, the guy said "Hey man, I'm gonna beat you up" and my cousin said "Look, if I show you some of my moves, I'll prove to you I can kick your ass in a fight" and so my cousin, y'know, he stepped back and, he took, uh, he took Tae Kwon Do, and he did a couple moves, y'know? He just stood there for like five minutes just doing his moves, and, y'know, some punches and kicks and... The guy just backed right off; he didn't even want to talk to him any more. So I think that should work.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> All right, well I'll try that. I'll try that.<br/><br />
'''Guy:''' All right. Sounds good.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br?><br />
'''Fan:''' You try- you always mention about how you're straight but yet in your video about you crushing a dildo, uh, doesn't that kinda like, y'know, not help your cause?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, it proves I'm straight because...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' But you have a dildo.<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I got it free with an order on adameve.com<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' But you ''kept'' it and shit. That ain't cool.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' What I don't... Why were there batteries in...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh yeah Chris, why ''were'' there batteries in it? Why did you keep it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I mean...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it wasn't an easy thing for me to sell, right off the bat, or even to make a profit, so...<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In fact in a way it's a good thing I kept it, cause it allowed me to be able to break it, like I did.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes but why would you keep it?<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why would you keep it?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I woulda saved it for my sweetheart, if she'd wanted it. To use it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Aaaahhh.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But if I were there wouldn't you prefer the real deal?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Some things that metal just can't replace.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Yeah.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I heard that.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' You didn't use it did you?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No I did not.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Did you just throw all the ones you had away?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I only had that one. And there you go, I ri- there you go, I broke it apart.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you just, like, ''take'' it apart, I mean, it did...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' ...seem to come apart, like, screwed on...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I did not take it apart, that thing was glued at the seam. I had to put a lot of strength into breaking it at the middle there.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, but I think, um, showing your moves would be better.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Right.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Clyde would mess with you if you show him you can kick his ass.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey, Chris's a muthafuckin' ''gangsta''!<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Blap blap.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yes, Chris will fuck Clyde's shit up.<br /><br />
(awkward pause)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait, Chris, didn't you say you used a - didn't you say you used scissors to break the dildo?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I pretty much did have to so I could break that ''glued seam''.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, I thought you broke it with your hands.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well I- yeah well I would have but it was dang glued at the seam, so I clipped straight in with the scissors I had.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a pair of Super Shears from [[Cutco]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(feigning interest)'' Huh.<br /><br />
<br />
===19:50 Chris defends his Rule 34===<br />
<br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, let's talk about something else. Uh, Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whenever the announcement of the adult Sonichu page, when I looked at your gallery, very nice stuff, you know, I see a picture of what looks like you with a Sonichu, uh, medallion. Like, and, who's that one girl, exactly?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Who, [[Megan]]?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I thought it was, like, [[Crystal]], cause of the hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, it was - it was originally drawn to be Megan but I censored her eyes to, uh, port- to protect her identity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Mmmmmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''(laughing)'' That's stupid! (?) That's so silly.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I drew that after I found the ED page in November.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you say that?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In protest against it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thought you were going to get rid of it anyway.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I tore up the original drawing, I, in- into squares, and I put in in an envelope.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you upload it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you do that shit? Like, and...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I understand Rosechu, but, like y'know, why, like, something that's from real life. That's the problem (?)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's not necessarily from real life, it depends on you inter- it depends on your interpretation, I mean it's hardly- I mean, '''most women have long brown hair, and the eyes are censored''', so...<br/><br />
(laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''Most'' women?!?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I remember in that one video you were saying it was Megan.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because it broke, because it end up, because it the end it broke up my friend - broke up my friendship eve, my uh, friendship with Megan.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um, can I ask you a question? In the third picture, with [[Angelica Rosechu]], what is... what's happening, is... God... doing...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nope. She's masturbating. And she's enjoying it.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But she has no hands there. How's she doing it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' She's ''enjoying'' it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But she does... She does...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah but how's she doing it? She doesn't have her hands there.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> She does have her hands, she's... ''(stress sigh)'' She's... like most women would be able to do the same thing.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thing it's the angle, Julie. I think it's the angle you were looking at it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah plus uh, the picture wasn't, uh, very - wasn't as clear as, like, you know, I would have liked to have had it, uh, I mean, I had that file for a while, and it...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah some of those are kinda blurry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, some deg- some degraded.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ? a good question, have you drawn anything... of... have you drawn anything like that with me? Cause I would actually like to see, if you did. If so, could you, and let me see? I, uh, sorry, that's very rude to ask.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm sorry, let me answer this guy. Yeah, well, I made a retraction video later saying that I- I disowned that address.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ah, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just after that guy hacked into it and changed to it to suck. And as such.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hang on, I'm gonna take a look at that... My Youtube...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I like this song.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What song?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' The song that's playing in the background of, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what do you think of, uh, what do you think of that guy who advertises products, Billy Mays? What do you think of him?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... Billy... Oh! Yeah he's an ok guy, I watched him on Home Improvement.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Billy Mays?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, that was another guy on Home Improvement, Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No that was the same guy. That was the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Really?!? Let's look up. IMDB, go. ''(sound of typing)''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Believe me, it's the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, I really enjoyed your, um, adult, uh, section of the site.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... okey dokey, very good. Aaahh, trying to figure out how to update the link on this thing here. Oh, maybe under here. Oh there it is, thank God (?), update right now.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(singing)'' You spin me right round baby, right round...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (joining in) Like a record baby, right round round round<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's a classic, I can't help in man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There you are, updated. It's finally fixed.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Actually that was Richard Karn on Home Improvement, not Billy Mays.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well my mistake, I mean the guy had the beard and uhh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh yeah I can understand.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And the voice sounds- and the voice sounds the same...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah. They sound the same.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There's a matter of interpretation apparently I misinterpreted so I will admit that I was wrong.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah see we all make mistakes, don't be too hard on yourself.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unintelligible babble or singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you gotten any fan art submissions or notable? For the uh- webpage?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I got one today... It's like mostly a drawing of that uh that uh- of the fan herself.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -got in the snail mail today.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -Sunday.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hmmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What are you doing for this Valentine's day Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhm... I'm sorry, what was that question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What will you be doing this year on Valentine's day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm depends...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ahhh, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm.<br /><br />
Fan: Surely a man of such magnitude as yourself are going to be doing something important, aren't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Magnitude? Way to choose the words buddy.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Vocabulary talent.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, cause I don't have Julie over here yet.<br /><br />
(Reactions of OHs and AHs)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If she was here...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible) -play games.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Or we could just uh... talk.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Ehehehehe. Maybe... uh... why no redheads?<br /><br />
'''Other Woman:''' Yeah?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I was trying to think about that when the other guy asked that question. Uh... I was trying to think up that unh... mmmm... Uhhhh, redheads just don't be very- tract me so much.<br /><br />
Several: Uh, ah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's- it's- a- pi- a possibility that they're dyed.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmmmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But yeah y'know natural redheads enh, yeah, just don't really turn me on as much.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I see...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you thought about girls with um, highlights?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... (pause) aaahhhh... what turns me on hhh- (inhales) (pause) obviously the women.<br /><br />
'''Man:''' Gotta have the women. (?)<br /><br />
'''Guy''': What about piercings or tattoo?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, neither of those.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhhh-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris! How bout like non-orange hair, not like... no, never mind. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... oh... okay... hmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait Chris! How do you feel about blue hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Blue hair's okay, otherwise I wouldna- Otherwise I wouldn't've liked Sailor Mercury.<br /><br />
'''British? guy:''' That is true, she does have blue hair.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' She's a very fine character. There is no way to deny it.<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Blue hair is OFF DA HOOK!!!<br/><br />
<br />
===28:35 Chris impersonates various cartoon characters===<br />
<br />
'''British??? guy:''' Doesn't Marge Simpson have blue hair as well?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (in some kind of insane voice) Oh yeah! Marge Simpson has blue hair and it's as tall as the Empire State building!!!<br /><br />
(Some HMMs UHs and UMs follow)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yo Chris!! Can you do some impersonations for us?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Oh we'd love to hear that!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just did Marge Simpson.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah you're really talented.<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(Several people talking at once)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> -they're really good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Do another SimpsonsChris, how about Comic Book Guy?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Mmmmhmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I'm very indeed. Oh aren't we all promiscuous and whatnot. I like Batman and Robin, oh look! Stan Marsh has come into the thing again - I forget that guy's name, that guy who did the Marvel comics.<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Stan Lee. (Pause) Chris do your Donald Duck impression.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Everybody have fun (incoherent and scary quacking)<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris you should work for Disney.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's good Chris.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Have you ever considered being a voice actor?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Errrrrp... possibly, I'm not sure.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (incoherent, cut off by Chris)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent... another cartoon voice)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris, you're a Christian, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I was just wondering-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahm actu-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -do you just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm actually a Methodist church.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome, I was just wondering: Do you think AIDS was sent by god to kill the homos or do you think that it's just an accident or something man-made?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thou- the thought never occurred to me... thought never occurred to me.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' can you do an impression of Arnold Schwarzenegger?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hold- the question...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Let Chris answer the question.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thought- the thought never occurred to me about what you just said about the AIDS there mmmm... but y'know, it's a possibility and I will not agree nor disagree with it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I was just wondering I mean, I've had that discussion with some of my Christian friends. I just wanted to get your opinion, thank you.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmhhh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think (clears throat) I think Omicron has a point and you did tell me you went to a methodist church didn't you? So that's-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well th- well my Methodist church is uh more loose on- is not as strict on uh- on uh sex.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris I don't know- I don't know that much about religion in the States but I don't think there is a looser Meth- Methodist church. God makes the rules Omicron says.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, hmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well, you know personally I think that the government made AIDS to kill off all the brothers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whoa, whoa... That's what the blacks always say.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. (pause) I'm going to agree, that sounds like something that uh... well, a black guy would say.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So your church is kinda of uh- they let you do- their kinda loose on the whole moral restrictions?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... (pause) uhhh... that's... what's the question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Your church they- you said they're kind of more uh- y'know they're less strict on the whole moral thing, like, as far as sexuality goes? Right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -ah basically.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But y'know, uhh, I thought you're supposed to listen to the Bible or whatever not, y'know, not necessarily- no, never mind.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (interrupts)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, there's also a uh, there's also a- think about this uh, if you uh- if you- if you were a think uh- you have to find for yourself a good meaning behind uh- good meaning behind watching pornography to uh- like teach how it- how to do this and that when you actually get around to doing it...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's all ???<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's all's considered education for yourself.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' How is that realistic at all?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, it's uh- not a really good thing to learn from, trust me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It can be done before marriage as well as long as me and my sweetheart really love each other very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But not in Christianity.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But all I'm saying is y'know, porn is completely, completely unre- unrealistic I mean you can't really learn anything from it.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It gives- it gives you enough ideas.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unclear)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (incoherent) porn.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' When you actually have sex, it's nothing like porn.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe not like you, you not gonna do it-<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' You can't do it immediately- immediately anal sex cause most women are not very happy with anal sex and also...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay, shut up<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' -and also weird-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Shut up.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Yes.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And... that wasn't cool, like...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That was uncalled for...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, like, suthin' a BLACK MAN would say...<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' That's racist man...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, somebody said it on here first before I did.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Does that make it ok?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, I think he's trying to make it clear that- I dunno.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I typically agree with that guy.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So nothing g- it doesn't make it ok.<br /><br />
(incoherent)<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling) I wi- I'm sorry, I take it back.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(unclear)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Guys can we get back to Sonichu, Please?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah this is getting ridiculous.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unclear) -Sonichu actually.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Anyway, my question is that: why does Sonichu not wear clothes while Rosechu and the other Rosechus do wear clothes? And underwear?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Aaaaaaaaaamp... It's like uh- it's basically a cartoon and it doesn't really matter, it's like... mm... think about this: Most cartoon characters wear at least one article of clothing. At least one article. And uh- it's like Yogi Bear who just wears a necktie and a hat.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 35.14)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Other Guy:''' I think it would be cool if all the Sonichus and Rosechus got together and they and- they all formed a big team and they had special uniforms or something, kinda like the X-men.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Or Power Rangers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh yeah, I don't do- I don't do well- I'm not in- no uniforms. It's a uniform and other Sonichus and Rosechus.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'm just wondering if you'd do another impression: What does Blachu sound like? Uh, Black Sonichu? Or Blake?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eeeeuuunh... Eh... ahhhh...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Can you imitate it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... I'm not sure... uhhhhm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Like does he sound black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Possibly, but I'm not certain. I'm not leaning towards it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I'd like to hear it, but if you don't want...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just never- I just never really thought about that. I'd say that he possibly sounds similar to uh, y'know Shadow the hedgehog. But he could possibly sound, black. He could. Don't quote me on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' All right, I was just wondering if you'd do his voice but...<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Hey why does the BAD guy gotta be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never said the bad guy "has to" be black. (pause) I mean, look at the- the range of villanies, I mean there's black and whites and uh... male females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I noticed that uh- Silvana's also... black lookin'.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just decided to color her black because she was born- she came from outer space from a black egg, which was the- which came out of the rainbow.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah, I was also wonderin' about that like-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I- I- I-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' If Silvana came out of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes it's-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Why would she be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' I mean like black ain't part of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like the black sheep of the family. Y'know you put all the colors together and it does become black.<br /><br />
(unintelligible reactions)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -like a brownish-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) is a (unintelligible) color.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Maybe it's because she's from space and there's not a lot of light in space and it's dark or something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah that- a uh yeah- that's one of the-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hmmm.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhm, did you look at the link of my friend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, ummmm...<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Yeah, since you love blue hair.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh- no I haven't looked at it and I don't wanna make Julie feel jealous if I did- if I went and did.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Julie would mind.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhhh...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You look at pornography don't you?<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' (mumble)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, that- that was two syllables "Rose-chu". You don't- don't add- don't say the "e" it's just "Rosechu".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah you went over this last chat.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>(I don't know, it sounds like "narrator")<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sounds like he says "narrator" again)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh... I was just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, well, obviously the uh- the narrator who did those audio books was incorrect. Specially since I never gave that person the approval to do the audiobooks.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think it's just a fan project and I think he-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' and I think he might have one of the West coast dialects. I know that the South they say y'all but over here-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well obviously he lied-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -different. I'd be proud if they made one of my projects into an audiobook though. That means that there are a lot of fans out there that really like it.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Ay.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' They're not selling to try and make any money off it. They're not trying to rip you off. They always made sure- they always narrate the first page by saying "Christian Weston Chandler" so they're not trying to cheat you or anything.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' The people know you're making it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I- I hear that. I just, apparently they misin- misinterpreted the (audio breaks up) name Rosechu. Or mispronounced it. Misinterpreted, mispronounce- fairly the same thing in that situation... possibly. To answer that question... possibly.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uh, Vivian said that the audiobooks made Sonichu way popular that- than you could ever ever do on your own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I will not disagree with the statement. And I appreciate her help.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris. Would you be offended if a fan wrote a fanfiction about Sonichu?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Faaanfiction... if it's- if it's not demeaning or makes them look stupid. Then it's fine- it's fine. (pause) Like I did mind when, shoot, what's his name? That guy... uhhhh... that guy that the uhhhh... did the animations, on his computer.<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' You did mind or you didn't?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Animations???<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think I know what he's talking about. Are you talking about the um...<br /><br />
<br />
(background noise begins)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' Well the original play was a Greek play. Where they're all y'know... Greeks... and crazy stuff happens and they're all runnin' around in togas. So if you ever wanna see the movie "A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum" it was a classic and it had some real classic people from the 50s and 60s in it. Kinda like "It's a MAD MAD MAD MAD World". Sort of a classic old school movie from funny old school world. First color movie type thing. But that'll be a high school play. You'll wanna see that. You might actually enjoy it. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
(inaudible response)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' You never know that might be fun to do. Well I guess that wouldn't work on the weekend then... you gotta...<br /><br />
<br />
'''(FOR THOSE OF YOU WONDERING WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON, IT APPEARS THAT THERE WAS SOME TECHNICAL PROBLEM THAT CAUSED ANOTHER MUMBLE CHANNEL TO BE RECORDED WHILE THE CONVERSATION WITH CHRIS BECAME BARELY AUDIBLE BACKGROUND NOISE. INSTEAD ALL THAT CAN BE HEARD IS SOME BUTTFACE YAMMERING ABOUT FILMS AND TELEVISION SHOWS. I'M NOT GOING TO KEEP TRANSCRIBING IT. CHRIS IS STILL TALKING AND ANSWERING QUESTIONS, BUT NOTHING CAN BE UNDERSTOOD OVER THESE GUYS.)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''(AT 42.56 THE AUDIO SUDDENLY RESUMES NORMALLY)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Unknown person:''' Uh you-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I uh- noticed he's another BLACK villain.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah in real life he was black. Without meaning any offense to the uh- black guy in general, cause you've noticed, among the Jerkops there's uh- we got black's and white's, males and females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(several people jump in at once)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) -you've never drawn a female officer before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well y'know uhhh... uhhh, comic book number 7, near the end. Near the end of the time travel episode. Uhh, I have no opinion about what Obama's doing cause I don't watch the news.<br /><br />
Accented woman: But you voted for him, didn't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes I voted for him because I saw myself in him when I com- when I saw both the documentaries and downloaded them for the Playstation Network between Obama and McCain. I mean voted for a person I saw more of myself of-<br /><br />
Accented woman: You usually vote for someone based on their political leanings, not how you view them. As I were Republican, I voted for John McCain. Not because I liked him but because I- he had the same political views as me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basi- basically I'm a moderate.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh, I see. Um, I was wondering. I was reading opinions: do you agree with his financial bailouts?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm, I don't even know what it is. So I can't disagree or agree.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Well, to make it short um, it's about uh- the government- President Obama is planning to uh- a new one- (cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You got cut off there.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uhh, ok, we lost him.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yo, Chris, uh, do you, you didn't just vote for Obama cause he was black, did you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I did not vote for him because he was black. I voted for him cause I saw myse- because I saw myself in him. In like, similar lifestyles. And I saw that he was a good man, I mean after all, com- I saw- I saw I watched both of the A&E documentaries, before I can- before I knew who I would vote for.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 45.29)'''<br /><br />
<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris:, Chris what did you see in him that you say in your self?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Like for one thing we were like outcasts, at least one point in our lives.<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Wait, wait hold up earlier you said that you thought he would probably paint the white house black.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh oh that was my father’s joke he said that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Is your father a racist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but you see I drew that for him before I saw the documentaries so respectfully withdrew that comic page.<br /><br />
'''???:''' does your father hate black people.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Not necessarily but it’s just how my father just how my father that does not reflect in any way that’s how he felt (annoying ass noise in the background)<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Man that racist.<br /><br />
'''??? :''' Hey Chris I so the ahh saw the Sonichu and Rosechu love sack that you put up and I thought if was pretty cool for (you adult friends?) I just had a question though: do you have any plans in the comic to have romance between you and one of the hedgehogs I mean-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Yelling) No no no<br /><br />
'''???:''' -we would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' I mean is was just wondering because there are fans how would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Now- now that you answered the his question my kind of relates to his what are your thoughts on inter racial breeding and marriages?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would not agree of disagree with them but in my personal preference I would fell- I would feel more comfortable in having a full relationship with a white woman but I am willing- am still willing to be friends and acquaintances and give and have respect for the black women as well.<br /><br />
'''???:''' What about Asians like Japanese?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I’m ok with them as well (yelling) a once.<br /><br />
'''???:''' So would you get married with a Japanese woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hhhmmmm I would have, yes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> but I’m giving Julie to opportunity here.<br /><br />
'''Clyde:''' Julie’s a lucky woman.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris, I was just wondering, is Silvana gonna become one of the good guys like Blake before?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There’s a possibility but I have not confirmed that yet.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Is she gonna get the male sexual parts and become a full-fledged woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhhmmm possibly but I haven’t given that thought either.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Also um reading (?Phillip’s?) question what did you want to be when you were little?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don’t remember, I do not remember I’m just making it as I go basically.<br /><br />
'''???:''' is there ever gonna be an end to your sonichu series like a finally.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hmmmm I don’t know ,probably would not.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Oh so it keeps going and going?<br /><br />
???: You ever consider making comic about the history of CWCville?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhmmmm an episode dedicated to that possibility.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris are you going to keep the name changes that you made or are you going back to the original names?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahhh ya I’m keeping the name changes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' But you know umm Nintendo was umm they sent you a letter you never really talk about it further.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but at less at less they use to benefit me for the fact that allowed me to fix noting in that since I couldn’t be sued by such people in that since so the name change is for good.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 50 min)'''<br /><br />
<br />
(scattered reactions)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So the name changes were good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So uh, Chris I was wondering if uh Mary- Mary Lee Walsh Or I guess the new name: Ryam Sla- I don't know-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Sla-weel.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Slaweel, thank you. Uhm, if she were to use her magic to curse Rosechu with a penis, what- wou- would that test the relationship between Sonichu and her? While they were fighting the battle to have it removed.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... Firstly uh, she does not- she does not have the power ch- to do that.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I just thought you know, remember you did the story about 4-cent-garbage and drawing all the- the picture and-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah you what, that's one- that's one thing: drawing them, but not actually putting them on the character.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Cause I think that would be like an epic story though-<br /><br />
Fan: I'll second that.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' to have a quest to go to have that penis removed from Rosechu. I mean it's a test of romance between her and Sonichu.<br /><br />
(muttering)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And when that prevails and the penis is removed and everybody- everybody lives happily ever after. Y'know that would be awesome.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnnnnnh, I dunno I have to- I dunno I have to think about that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It is a really good idea. I mean I like it.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I do too.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah, that's good.<br /><br />
Other fan: It could show just how much Rosechu means to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I'll- I'll consider it but I'm not making any promises.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' We understand.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(several talking at once)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -decided on that subject?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm working on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' If you actually decide to go forward with that story? Do you think maybe- maybe you could give her a talking penis?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!!!<br /><br />
(laughter from various people)<br /><br />
(unintelligible responses)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ok, I think- I think we've talked enough about that one guys.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I have a question that doesn't involve penises.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Anyway, my question is since we've been hearing lot of vicious lies and slander about this, could you confirm exactly why you've been fired from your job at Wendy's Chris? Cause we've been hearing all sorts of- of crazy things and we wanna know the truth.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmmmmmm... well, firstly, what have you heard?<br /><br />
'''Other guy:'''Well we heard that uh you... we've heard so many things like you helped a small child and you did a Donald Duck impersonation and you scared the child.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... also that- also that is correct but I did not scare the child. The child was tired, I was only- I was only trying to make the child feel better. That's a little amusement. But I did not make the child cry, the child was already- was just tired.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' So you didn't help them cut their food and... yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I did help them- help them get their food to- by giving them uhh, by giving them bags and a top for their baked potato boat.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris, when will um, the pictures of Zapina, um, appear on the 18 plus page?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that was a deleted scene! That was a deleted scene.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Why was it deleted?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basically, hhh... y'c- y'cant' really have it if you don't have Rosechu working to take the- working to take the pictures of herself up in the bathroom. Cause like can't have one without the other.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaahhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I don't know if this is a good question but there's something I wonder about that- we kind of have this DVD you made and... we never unfortunately got... but I'm curious um... do you ever plan to release it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I'd pay money for that, I think everyone else here would probably pay money for it too.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Indeed.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (breaking up) I wanna ask a question.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I hear it's also on YouTube.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris do you know that you've influenced the rap/hip hop community?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmh... uh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I just wanted to mention that because I saw some YouTube videos and it- and- and from some underground hip hop artists such as ??? and they've sampled some of your voice audio complaining about your struggles with uhm... with the school board, with the security guards and they were- they felt so empowered that they actually took those words and mad'em into a very powerful rap song. How does that- how is your reaction to that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhhhh... basically I have not watched those videos so... I don't have an opinion.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I will provide you a link to that, hold on a moment.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh that's ok, actually I uh, did sample one. The one where they basically played the parody from "Can't touch this".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, no, see it's waaay more serious than that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I still haven't heard of- heard of what you're talking about.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Nevermind.<br /><br />
(rustling and moving noises)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do an impression of MC Hammer?<br /><br />
(more clicking and rustling)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Can't touch this do do do doo do dooo Can't touch this! Do do do dooo do do do... can't touch this.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' That was- heheheh.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Awesome.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you- can you do Dr. Nick Riviera from the Simpsons?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> HIIII EVERYBODY!<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hello Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hi Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hi Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that should say Dr. Nick cause that's who I'm imitatin'.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''???:''' That uh-<br /><br />
'''???:''' HELLOOO EV'RYBODY!!!!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well that-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hi Dr. Nick!<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Thank you, I love the Simpsons.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do... Peter from Family Guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhenhenhenh... Hey Lois! Look at me! I'm just (unclear) you nose, and I'm eatin' your nose.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh that's dead on.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Oh would you- Omicron's been interested in tis- would you actually make a documentary like- like your other DVD but make your daily life?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... I'm... yeah I might but uh... I'm not su- I'm not sure bout it at the moment.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaaaaaaanh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris can you do Mario? You know from Super Mario?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hay paisano! How you doin' mistah hedgehog!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's very good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then Sonic- then Sonic would say "what?!?"<br /><br />
(giggling)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris do you have any plans to make a video of yourself taking a dump on a Hexbox?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No! That's gross.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Yeah that was pretty sick right there.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Let's ban him.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's bad enough I cut in half with an axe.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> and one of the elevator jokes...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Oh we remember that, that was a classic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And I earned a trophy for that.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmm...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Yeah, I remember that, it was destroying a Hexbox by cutting it in half if I remember...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' If I were to draw nude Zapina fanart, uhm, would you put them on the site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... uhh, your- you uh- free to draw them at your- at your own- own preference, but I will not be- I will not put it on the website because- cause- because I will not want to break any laws of having underage portrayals- portrayals of underage nudity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Isn't Dot a child?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry... what?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dot, from Animaniacs.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' So-uh- uhm- I think I looked up somewhere that um, drawings do not count, they're just lines on paper not like real pictures that are horrible.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah I believe-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Draw-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (cut off)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Those illustrations do not count as child pornography. Because with drawing it's art- it's artistic merit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Welll... I dunno, I guess it depends I have to- but- y'know you could do the drawing and I'll think- I'll consider it.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, would it be possible to get any pictures of Sonichu having anal sex with Rosechu?<br /><br />
(pause... thumps and feedback)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm considering that but...<br /><br />
'''Accented woman''' Who keeps letting this person in? You are very offensive.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -and and, if you draw those, do you think that Rosechu would actually clean Sonichu's penis off with her mouth (laugh) w-when they're done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nah, no, I don't think so, I think- I think- I think it would be unh- yeah w-wash it off with a washcloth.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Do you think in, at that point then they would sell the washcloth on EBay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!<br /><br />
(people talking over each other)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, no, no more party humor, all right?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah alright, okay<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Unrelated to party humor, I want to ask that in your Springbreak uhh Issue of Sonichu you had an introduction of a, of new character, the [[Yawning Squirtle|squirtle]] and I wanna ask<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:''' (interrupting)</span> No, that's, no, no, no, that's not just a character, I was, I was not introducing a new character, I was just doing like a poster thing for a bubble speak under one, I thought I just draw some water type pokemon un-in there<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I understand but the thing is there is huge cult following for that character and I strongly suggest that you should capalize on that and, and make him to a main character<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eh... No, I don't think so<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's just sleeping Squirtle work waking up<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, people just thought he was really cute and yawning Squirtle, I don't know, I heard someone say, man wouldn't it be great if he would be that [[Autistic|dopey]] sidekick that he'd come and they'd be like, like, he'd come in and say something silly after someone did something and they would be like Squirtle!<br /><br />
People laughing and talking over each other<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Ehm...<br /><br />
???: Yo, it makes you *unintelligible* (Chris and someone talk over another)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yes Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I'm asking you about... Hm... Never mind, I lost my train of thought. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's okay. These guys made me lose a train of thought as well. Doesn't multiple inputs.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yes, kinda lotta control here. I may have to... never mind<br /><br />
Silence<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I never lose my train of thought because I have a GPS tracking system on it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, that was a good joke. (chuckle)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, could you tell us a joke right now. Just any joke.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay, here is a fuck - here is a funny ...here is a funny mind scream. Funny rhyme scheme - not to be taken literally:<br /><br />
On your Game Boy Advance SP<br /><br />
create cher ME<br /><br />
den play da WII<br /><br />
with your PSP<br /><br />
hooked to your PS3<br /><br />
cause it's fun<br /><br />
see?<br /><br />
And never ff, and never play a [[Hex Box]] 360<br /><br />
Because it's stupid and you're not a dummy (in childlike voice)<br /><br />
Mock laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Is that something you made up?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I made that up<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Chris, Chris, can I write that down and tribute to quote you that? Oh man, that's good<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) So you mean to type it up and you quote me on the rhyme scheme?<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Yeah, I'd like that. I've been thinking about making a quote book like a mini Chris quote book like something you could open and have a cool line to say when you're on a party and you're like right things<br /><br />
People talking over Chris and Alucard<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, well I'm typing it up for Alucard, so...<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Thank you<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span>Chris, can we hear one more?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Here is an [[Christian's sex joke|adult joke]] I once come up<br /><br />
'''Fan''': This is going to be good!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There was this married couple, Bob and Jane, and they have been looking forward to having children. So, one night, Bob comes home from work, and Jane says, "Hi, you had a good day, dear?" And he says, "Nah, I felt alone, darling" And she said, "Well, it's okay, why don't we go upstairs, and we'll have some Breakfast." "Breakfast, at Nine p.m.?" And she says, "Sure, you bring the MILK, and I'll get an EGG."<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yo, I heard that before, man<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then later, they had a boy and a girl, Junior Bacon and Orange Juice. All Part of a Balanced Breakfast.<br /><br />
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif]]<br /><br />
Perplexed silence<br />
<br />
'''Fan''': Hey, Chris, how do you solve a Mexican tank?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Stand in front of it?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': No, man, shoot the guys pushing at it<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fans''': Oh that's a good one<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' I got one<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get a bunch of [[Niggos|blacks]] in a car?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Throw some chicken in.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get them out of the car?<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Job application<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What do you call a beach of black people buried up to their necks?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Afro-turf.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I came up with one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what's the difference between a black man and a pizza?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': A pizza can feed a family of four.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': How do you stop black people from jumping on a bed?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, enough racist jokes.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''':Put velcro on the ceiling.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enough, enough black jokes.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, uh Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Sorry<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I showed by friend that over 18 site, and he said, that he um, he um, you know he, he masturbated to it. Does that make you feel (interrupted)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's good, that's basically the reaction I would be going for. Among the male ca... among the male population, being attracted to the women.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But those are your drawings, it's like, I think he's gay now. I mean, you're a guy and you drew those.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm drawing, I'm drawing female characters.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yah, but it's drawn by you and you're, like, I don't know. It's kind of awkward for me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris, I actually need to thank you, the pictures on that site, it looked like the camera was inside Sonichu's penis when Rosechu was giving him a blowjob. That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. I've always wanted to have a camera in my penis so that I could see that if I ever got a blowjob, that would be awesome, I just wanted to say thank you very much for that perspective. It's the first time I've ever seen it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': There's a question here on the site, oh sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, well I see it... no I don't basically masturbate to my own drawings.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But you're okay if other people do, right? Even guys?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You're okay if other people, you know, masturbate to your drawings? Even if they're guys, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If the guys are masturbating to the female drawings, then yes, that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I just thought it was kind of awkward, but maybe I'm seeing it a different way.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I doubt that, uh, having a whole bunch of drawings of naked female characters can be misinterpreted as something else.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': I want to ask you a question.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': One time, a friend and I were looking at porn together, and we masturbated together, but the porn was straight, ordinary porn. Is this gay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I'm sorry, where you looking at naked women?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Yes, but we were in the same room, masturbating.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, if you both were thinking about the naked women you were looking at, then I would definitely say you both are straight, cuss you're not thinking about each other, you're thinking about the women.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Right. <br /><br />
'''Fan''': Would you do that with someone?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': I'm relieved.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Man, nigger you gay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Shut up. Would you do that with someone? Like a guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Nah, I'm straight dog.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I'd, yeah I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Omnicron has a question on here, on the side here.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You see it, or?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. That's not straight.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what about the earlier question.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, the one before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, which one before? Oh, you mean...<br /><br />
(All talk at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, what do you think about.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wait, wait let him answer.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Let him answer that one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was gonna rephrase it but okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'd say it would depend on your interpretation, what is adultery to you?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But, you know, isn't the Bible only supposed to be interpreted, it's the word of God, you're not really supposed to interpret it any other way.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': It is what it is.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's in English.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh, I have no comment.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, that's what my, uh, you know I was talking about my mom saw those drawings. I mean, not the drawings, the posters, the playboy posters and that's basically what she got bad about. She said I was committing adultery.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah okay, if you don't want to talk about it, fine.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, hmmm, I think you shou, I think you should, uh, when you, I think I can see where this could be interpreted one way or another, it depends on how you look at the woman. I mean, alright, you're looking at the, uh woman, you might be imaginin' her naked, but, I mean, you would respe, I mean, you would, you would still respect, I mean, if you were still respecting that woman, you would appreciate her more for like who she was aside or in addition to the (something), that's not as bad as just, as just only doing it for the appearance.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's why, uh, that's why the playboy magazines, they give you the introductions of the women. It's like letting you know who they are (unintelligible).<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, but there weren't any, uh, descriptions under the, yeah never mind.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Thank you for the clarification Chris.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris, do you love America?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm patriotic.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's good. I was wondering if you could sing the national anthem for us?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [[Wikipedia:My Country, 'Tis of Thee| My country tis' of thee. Sweet land of liberty. Of thee, of thee I sing.]] I don't remember the rest.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Lands where my fathers died.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Land of the pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
(Fans all start singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Stop it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey I'll, I'll tell y'all a funny joke that's kind of patriotic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, you got this, you got this funny, you got this funny Mexican guy, and he just, he just come back home to Meh-he-co after an American visit. He's like (high pitched voice) Oh the people there are so very friendly. I mean, I go to the basketball game. I sit in the back row. I sit in the back row. And then, and then, and then all of, and then all of the sudden right before the game started, everyone turned around, put their hands on their chests, and they say, "Oh say can you seeeeee"<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I thought you said no racist jokes?<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': Yeah man, that ain't cool!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was a name, it was a name joke.<br /><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''':...Spanish language<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm kind of offended by that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': That's racist dog. That ain't cool.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': You laugh you support terrorism.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, what?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What'd you say?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What the hell? Who said that?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Forget it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I said, you laugh, you support terrorism.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, he's gone.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Awful Mr. T impression) I pity the fool, who try and misinterpret things, and try and jam new words into my mouth.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You do a good Mr. T<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah you do.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) no jibber jabber.<br /><br />
(Fans laugh)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, did you watch the A-team back in the day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No but, no but, basica, but I have seen Mr. T. And then I also, I also saw when he guest starred in an episode of Alvin and the Chipmunks.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I saw that episode, he helped uh Theodore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Theodore was getting picked on.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, you posted a link here.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well at my [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|Methodist church]], uh, sex before marriage is okay as long as, uh, she and I, we love each other very much and truly.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But that's what they tell you, I'm talking about the word of God.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *Sigh* Okay, I'm getting tired, okay, I'm getting tired here, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, but...<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, sorry, no more of that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, you're right. Please stay Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay. Alright, I'll stay a little while longer.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, if anyone does, if anyone asks anything that makes him feel uncomfortable, I'm gonna kick you out of the room.<br /><br />
(Everyone speaks)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I have a Japanese friend, he's, he's actually 26 and he's never had a girlfriend and we asked him some questions, just joking around one day. And we asked him if his, when he gets married, if his wife wanted to sleep with another man, would he be okay with it, and he actually said yes, as long as she wasn't being forced. Now that kind of bothered us, because us Americans, right, we think that marriage, and you know you're with somebody, they should be faithful, but he doesn't seem to think so, so I wanted to see if you had any advice maybe on what we could do to try and convince him that his viewpoint is wrong.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, hmm, it's not necessarily that the viewpoint is wrong. See, the thing is, what, to, to quote, to make it accepta, to make it like as if you're actually cheating on somebody, cheating on your spouse in the marriage, it's like not telling them, not telling him, not telling him or her about it beforehand, but it's like, you know, you, it's like you tell them beforehand and you get their approval, it's, it's okay, even if they don't want to be part of it. But not telling them, that's definitely like cheating on them.<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that's another thing I would have to think about, cuss got a bit of a, couple of items of destruction(?) that need to be repaired<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I just got, I just talked to that one friend I was talking about who, uh, saw your website, the 18 one, and it turns out he's, he's gay, he's actually gay and he fapped, uh I mean he masturbated to, uh, Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hahaha, your friend's a fag.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': And I think he's...<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out for 15 seconds)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ...about that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I think in case you would definitely want to let him know that you are straight and you don't want that kind of relationship, and maybe, and you know<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I tell him just to get the hell away from your site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm not saying that, but like, uh, you know, you don't want that kind, you don't, I mean that's, that's basically confirmed on that note. So, uh, you want, you still wanna be friends but you don't, but you're not into that kind of thing.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I mean, he was looking at your site, like, the 18 site and he was in like, um,<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Over 18.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': The over 18 site you made. The loveshack. I thought he was just like, you know, masturbating to Rosechu, but it turns out he was attracted to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *sigh* Uhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, I don't think I'll be friends with this guy anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, yeah, then tell him, yeah, to get the hell out of your house and stay away if you don't want to be friends anymore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Seems like you know too many gay friends mister.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh shut up.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris, you know how cologne or perfume, you know, women wear that to try and attract men? Do you think that farts attract gay guys to each other?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Now that's stupid! Not only is that stupid, but it's gross.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Here, I'm gonna take that question and I'm gonna, I'm gonna take that question and spin that into something that's less weird. What would you say the best cologne or whatever a guy could wear to get a girl's attention?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I recommend [[Axe|Axe]] body spray.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh yeah? I think I tried that one time.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': That actually does it for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What scent do you use?<br /><br />
(All speak)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Don't you use ass body spray?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Mmm, love it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Does the Axe effect, does it really exist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Does Axe exist?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, the Axe effect. You know, they say in the commercials spray it and girls will come to you.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) and it works for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Has it worked for you Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, well, yeah, I, yeah I haven't got that working for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I think it's a scam personally.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I mean... I mean, Old Spice is pretty good. I had, I had like a couple of girls go up to me asking me for dates with Old Spice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I actually wore that Orion sent, uhh, still smelling it. So it will work Chris, you just gotta give it time.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Using the Axe.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Cameron but, isn't Axe spray for men?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': No no no no no no no, see, see I said a boyfriend, a boyfriend that I met.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, okay.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah. *laughs*<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Perfect sense.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, silly, silly. I have a question for you Chris, what celebrities have you met?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Well what I'm saying is the Axe effect doesn't work. Okay, sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't actually met any celebrities in person, my real life, unless you count a local radio DJ.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I've met the DJ of my radio station 95.1 and [[Excel Saga|Monica Rial]], and meeting Monica Rial was just a treat.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ahhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was, it was good.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, she's pretty.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Maybe you should go to her and, um, maybe she could be like a contact for voice acting. I mean, you do pretty good imitations.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Do Homer Simpson!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Homer Simpson impression) Oh, look at me! I'm a stupid old person, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp, D'OH!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That was awesome<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Who else can you do Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What other imitations can you do?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, a lot. It depends on if you name it, I might recall, if you name the person or character I'll, if I can recall my memory than I will imitate that person.<br /><br />
<br />
(transcribing end for now at 1:23:00)<br /><br />
<br />
<br />
{{Transcription}}<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 6|Mumble Chat 6]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 8|Mumble Chat 8]]|}}<br />
<br />
==Links==<br />
* [https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBWklfakp0TGdDSkU Download]<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
<br />
[[Christian's sex joke]] - Used during this chat.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_7&diff=163076Mumble 72012-09-27T20:10:55Z<p>Irisviel: </p>
<hr />
<div>'''Mumble 7''' is the seventh of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]], held on 13 [[February 2009]].<br />
<br />
Appears to be the genesis for the "Power" videos in which Chris attempts and fails to prove his [[I AM STRONG|strength]] and [[CWC Fighter|fighting]] [[Challenge For Clyde|skill]], though these would not materialize for several months.<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
* A fan talks to Chris about putting naked posters of girls and pictures of men up in his room up to find out if his friend was a [[homo]] as Chris suggested. He tells Chris that his girlfriend dumped him over the posters and his friend ignored all of them. Chris sees nothing wrong with his advice until Julie tells him that she wouldn't like that. Chris recommends sending an anonymous letter explaining the situation and utterly fails to apologize or show concern.<br />
* Fans point out that Chris shouldn't have to show and prove that he is straight.<br />
* Chris cuts a fan off to let Julie ask a question involving [[pedofork|shota]].<br />
* Fans ask Chris to turn his radio down.<br />
* Chris uses Wal-Mart printer paper & RSVP ballpoint pen to draw, and a 50-pack of Crayola markers to color. Refuses to use color pencils or Photoshop to color, saying he prefers the markers.<br />
* Chris talks about Omicron's redone version of [[Sonichu]], accusing him of plagiarism. Says that the difference between what Omicron is doing and what he is doing is that Sonichu is his. Agrees to let Omicron continue if he credits Chris with the copyright.<br />
* '''Julie is convincing Chris to make videos proving to Clyde how strong he is.''' Chris feels that the [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|dildo breaking video]] proved this. Fans say that Chris's dildo comes apart naturally for cleaning.<br />
* '''A fan recommends making a video showing off his fighting moves to scare Clyde.'''<br />
* Chris is asked why he would use a dildo in proving that he is straight. Chris says that he is straight for crushing it, fans call him a [[homo]] for keeping it.<br />
* Chris [[lie|denies]] [[BlueSpike PSN Chat 3|using the dildo]], and claims that it's now broken. Fan says it could easily be reassembled. Chris is adamant that it was glued and that it took a lot of strength to pull it apart.<br />
* When asked by Julie, '''Chris admits using super-shears from Cutco to break the dildo glue, claiming to use a lot of strength in the process'''.<br />
* Fans discuss [[SheCameForCWC.jpg]]. Chris insists that it was drawn in protest of [[ED]]. He says it was anonymous, as most women have long brown hair and her eyes were censored.<br />
* Insists that [http://www.cogsdev.org/cwcki/File:AngelicainGod%27sEyes.JPG the Rule 34 of Angelica Rosechu] is masturbating and enjoying it, and is using her hand to do it.<br />
* Chris thinks Billy Mays is on Home Improvement.<br />
* Chris isn't doing anything on Valentine's Day, as Julie is not there yet.<br />
* Chris discusses the the No-Redheads policy in his [[Love Quest]]. Says that redheads don't attract him unless they are not natural redheads. No piercings or tattoos allowed.<br />
* Chris is OK with blue hair.<br />
* Does a terrible Marge Simpson impersonation.<br />
* Chris impersonates Comic Book Guy and Donald Duck.<br />
* A fan presents the possibility that AIDS was sent by God to kill the [[homos]].<br />
* [[Chris and Religion|Premarital sex being forbidden in Christianity]] is discussed. Chris fumbles for an explanation.<br />
* '''A fan pretending to be black says he believes the government made AIDS to get rid of black people. Chris says that that's the kind of thing a black guy would say'''.<br />
* Premarital sex comes up again. Chris compares it to using porn to practice and learn skills for later.<br />
* The fake black fan calls Chris on his comment from earlier about black guys and AIDS. He makes the excuse that someone else said it first.<br />
* Questions on Sonichu start. Sonichu doesn't wear clothes because it's a comic. Chris isn't sure how [[Blake]] sounds. He might sound black, he might sound like Shadow the Hedgehog. The fake black fan asks why the bad guy has to be black, also mentioning [[Silvana]]. Chris says that he doesn't have to be.<br />
* Chris gets annoyed about the pronunciation of [[Rosechu]] as popularized by the Old Narrator of the [[Audiobooks]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't disagree that the Audiobooks made Sonichu more popular that he ever did'''.<br />
* He doesn't mind fanfics that don't portray Sonichu in a bad light.<br />
* The audio goes low in the main chat and a fan has a private, unrelated conversation for a few minutes.<br />
* Audio comes back as Chris is admitting that the [[B-Manajerk]] was black in real life.<br />
* Chris doesn't watch the news, so doesn't have an opinion on [[Barack Obama|Obama]]. He voted for him because he saw a documentary where he saw more of himself in Obama, namely that he was an outcast at one point.<br />
* A fan says that you should vote based on politics, not personality. Chris says that he is a moderate.<br />
* Chris doesn't know what the financial bailout is. He says that he drew the [[Sonichu 8#The Elevator Gags|racist picture]] of Obama based on his father's joke, before he saw the documentaries that made him vote.<br />
* Chris will not agree or disagree with interracial dating/marriage. He would want a white woman, but he would be [[gal pals|friends]] with others.<br />
* He'd marry an Asian.<br />
* It's not yet known if Silvana will be a good guy or if she will lose her [[pickle|dick]].<br />
* '''Chris doesn't know what he wanted to be when he was younger, he's just making it up as he goes along'''.<br />
* '''Chris is keeping the name changes in the comics for legal reasons'''.<br />
* A fan suggests Slaweel cursing Rosechu to have a dick. Chris gets upset before saying that he'll think about it. The fans think it's a great idea. One considers a talking penis for Rosechu. Chris says it's a stupid idea.<br />
* Another fan asks about Chris being sacked from Wendy's. He denies scaring the child with his Donald Duck impersonation, saying that he didn't make him cry.<br />
* Chris might release his DVD one day.<br />
* A fan says that Chris has influenced underground rappers such as Immortal Technique, who has sampled him.<br />
* Chris takes requests. Impersonates MC Hammer, Dr Nick Riviera, Peter from [[Family Guy]], Mario and Sonic, butchering them all and tainting our childhood memories.<br />
* More Sonichu questions. '''Chris won't upload [[Zapina]] [[Rule 34]] because she is underage and Chris is worried about legal ramifications'''. When he is reassured that this would be legal, he says he would consider it. He will also consider Sonichu-Rosechu anal sex. Rosechu would not clean the [[pickle]] with her mouth, she would clean it off with a washcloth. He would not sell the the washcloth on EBay.<br />
* Chris calls a stop to the potty humor displayed throughout the Sonichu questions.<br />
* '''Chris denies that [[Yawning Squirtle]] is a character'''.<br />
* Fans ask for a joke. He recites a dreadful rhyme about Videogame consoles. He then tells his awful [[Christian's sex joke|sex joke]]. Fans start to tell racist jokes about [[niggos|black people]] and Mexicans. Chris calls for a stop to this.<br />
* A fan says that his friend [[mass debating|masturbated]] to the [[rule 34|adult section of Sonichu]] and is now worried that his friend is a [[homo]], as they were drawn by a man. '''Chris says that this is what he intended it for''', and they are drawings of women, so his friend is straight. He doesn't masturbate to his own drawings.<br />
* Chris reassures a fan that [[Mass Debating|masturbating]] in the same room as another man isn't gay as long as both men are thinking of women, but he would not do this.<br />
* Chris offers no comment as to what constitutes adultery.<br />
* Chris says that he is patriotic. Asked to sing the national anthem, he instead mangles a few lines of "My Country, 'Tis of Thee". He then tells a 'patriotic' joke that is insensitive to Mexicans. [[Chris and Hypocrisy|The fans call him on his "no more racist jokes" statement from earlier]].<br />
* Chris does a poor impersonation of Mr T.<br />
* Chris says that if you are married, sleeping with someone else isn't cheating if you have consent from your spouse.<br />
* Chris gives more advice on homos and recommends Axe body spray for attracting girls.<br />
* Chris has not met any celebrities, only local DJs.<br />
* Does impersonations of Homer Simpson and Bender. The two sound identical.<br />
* Chris gives dating advice: Stay calm, polite, friendly and don't let your nerves get the best of you. Say "Hello, how are you" and talk about yourself. '''[[Barbara|His mom]] told him that standing around with a sign makes him look retarded. A female fan cracks up laughing and can't stop'''.<br />
* "Those who can't, teach"<br />
* Chris says he has never even been on a date. Rejects dating suggestions from fans.<br />
* '''Chris was close with Sarah "[[PandaHalo]]" McKenzie, but hasn't heard from her in over two weeks. He heard about the fires and doesn't know if she's still alive. When a fan adds that 108 people were killed in the fires, Chris responds to the entire ordeal with [[Chris and death|"It's OK though, at least I have a good woman who's willing to be by my side at this point"]]'''.<br />
* When pushed, he says he feels remorse for the the victims of the fires and is concerned that [[Sarah Cassandra McKenzie|Panda]] is dead.<br />
* He asserts that he didn't abandon Sarah for [[Julie]].<br />
* '''A fan says that if [[PandaHalo|Sarah]] isn't alive, Chris should take solace that her perfectly barbecued remains fed the survivors. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|SHUT UP!!!]]'''<br />
* Chris says that he cares about Sarah and Julie equally and wouldn't dump Julie as a friend. A fan asks what he will do to the survivors who ate Sarah. Chris replies with [[Chris and Anger|"SHUT UP!!!"]] and demands that he be booted.<br />
* Fans reassure Chris that Sarah is probably OK.<br />
* Chris does abominable impersonations of Uncle Ruckus from The Boondocks and Hank Hill. '''He sings "Don't Trust Them New [[Niggos|Niggas]] Over There"'''. He also impersonates Meowth and sings the Team Rocket song.<br />
* [[Clyde]] enters. Chris refuses to answer questions and leaves.<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
===Chris proves he is straight===<br />
'''Guy:''' Chris!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all! ''[echoes]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'll be damned.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey y'all.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh, Chris-[gets cut off by another guy]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh you know, can't com- it's uh, can't complain.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' How's construction of the site?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' [unintelligible] so Chris<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I...I need to ask you something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yup?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uh... I put those posters, of the... Playboy and everything in my room, and uh, one of my girlfriends saw it, and she got mad at me for looking at other w-... other girls, and she broke up with me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh... I'm sorry to hear that. It could-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, she's calling me a pervert. I-I don't understand this.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Did you... did you ex- did you try to explain to her about situation between you and that guy?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I... I did, and I don't think she understood.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... well, you should try, you should, uh, s-... try, uh, you should try wr-, you should tr-, uh, do you know her email address?<br /><br />
[pause]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So, uh Chris-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' A-also, wait... also, uh, the friend, I was talking about, he, uh, visited, and [typing noises] he, uh, he went into my room, and didn't even notice the posters. He just s-sat in the middle, he didn't s...sit in any uh, part of the room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Huh. Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, uh... so, yeah, I don't know. I mean, my girlfriend broke up with me, called me a pervert, said that I shouldn't be looking at other girls, I mean... I don't know what to do now.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well listen, uh, answer my question, do you have her email address?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Umm... yeah, but she won't... she won't answer me anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm... ok, hmm. Here's what you can do, uh... Do you know your girlfriend's... any of your girlfriend's [[Gal pal|gal-pals]]?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm... well, you should try to... like wr- you should write out... hmm... hmm... here's an idea. S- Write a letter to her and send it via smail mai-, via snail mail, but don't write the return address. On it.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What should I write?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just like, you know, like, they, you know, this is... you know, this is... you, uh, you put your name there, and you, it's, and then you would basically explain the situation between you and that guy, and that's why you had the posters up, well that's why you put the posters up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well I-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't really understand what was the point of the posters in the first place?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[sigh]'' it's... ''[sigh]'' if he looks at... if he, if he is very interested, if he is, if he was straight, he would uh, look at the women. Very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But he didn't even notice them. He didn't notice any of the posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, then I guess he is a [[Homos|homo]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' W...well, um, he wasn't looking at anything, not even the guy posters.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Hmm... He's not blind, surely.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' So, like, what is he, is he like, uh...I don't know.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I don't know either, man. But, you know at the moment I would suggest you, uh, write the- write the letter to your girlfriend, send the mail, don't write your return address on the envelope, and, uh, mail it to her.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Also my mom saw the posters and she got offended, she's like really religious and st- she said that like, uh, you know, lust is a sin or some shit. Oh, like she said, she's like all against the, the uhh, the like, Playboy in my room.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Well, your- apparently your mom hasn't been [beeps] that open minded that time. So, you know, give her time to reh-cover, she'll uh, she might op- she might open up.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I don't think that was a good idea though, I mean, w-why did-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [unintelligible interruption]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -you suggest it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I was trying to see if he, to, I was trying to s-help you figure out if your uh, if your friend was a homo or not.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I know, but, do you have uh, [Fans talking] Playboy posters in your room?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unclear] I'm very forward.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I have uh, poster of some, of uh, I have a poster in my room of uh, some uh, naked girls I got from adamandeve.com as a bonus.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Then, nobody says anything about it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''[clears throat]'' Well, I didn't really have too many oppor- too many people in my room. So, it's kind of like in a hard to notice place.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Um, wondering, um, If you showed anyone, wouldn't they be offended?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe, maybe not, [Fan grunts] it just depends on their point of view.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I wouldn't want the same thing that happened to me to happen to you.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. I hear you there. Uh, just to so just sound clear... Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Julie, are you there?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ok, uh, would you be offended if you saw such a poster in my room?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''[breaks up]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, What will, what was that? [Echoes]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie'''</span> Yes I would, kind of.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well that's no problem, I can take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, see that's what I'm talking about, I mean...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, that's why I asked Julie right now, because I respect her. So, because she said that she would, I will take it down.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I've been thinking, um...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you have... [unclear] Chris, I don't think you should look at other woman.[sic] In my opinion.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I see, Julie. Well that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I...I respect that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' She might get jealous, I mean, that's what happened to my...my girlfriend.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, that's fine Julie, I respect your, I respect that. Just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey, can I ask you a question? If uh, he's done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, uh, one more thing, um, you know I've been thinking, uh, I don't really think you need, you know, posters and stuff like,<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' to prove you're straight, I mean, if you're straight, that's all there is to it i-if, am I right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think you're right.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I...I mean, you shouldn't have to prove that you're straight.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> You're right.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I m-mean [line breaks temporarily] Y-you shouldn't have to reassure yours-self. You should just be knowing it, and nothing anybody says, should get very, uh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, it's ve-ah-very-but you see, I have like, I have that [[Sailor Moon Poster of Fail|Sailor Moon poster]] in my room, it's just, so that like, you know, for in case I have any-for in case I have any random thoughts, on account really, to tempt me.<br /><br />
''[unintelligible mix of chatter from most participants trying to get their word in]''<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' I-I mean, even if they're random thoughts, even if they're random thoughts, if you know you're ''positive'' about it, you shouldn't have to look at anything to make sure.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, usually.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay. Uh, moving on from all this homosexuality, uh, I have one question, uh- [gets cut off by Chris in the background] ...never mind, [fat douchebag?]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey, ah, let Julie ask a question, let Julie ask her question.<br /><br />
<br />
===7:08 Julie asks about shotacon===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, I was watching you on the Internet yesterday and, what's a shotacon?[slightly cut off]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...I'm sorry, uh-y, I'm sorry, you got cut off, what was that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> What's a sho-[cuts off again]-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...What's a...''short''?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Shot-[cuts off third time, pretty obvious she's saying ''shota'']-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dude, shota.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, shota.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ssshhhh...shota?<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, S-H-O-A-T-A [sic].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, it's a word he found online.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Yeah, [baby?], yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never heard of that word.<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' Hmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I dunno, if you want to look it up, you can probably find out on an online dictionary...<br /><br />
''[pause, and a weary sigh from someone other than Chris]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'll-I'll take a look. Hang on.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I know some Japanese and I think I've heard that somewhere, like in a magazine or something.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, it's some of that Japanese shit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm. Probably is. Three moments, I'll look it up.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Okay!<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's radio is audible]''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Whoops, that was the wrong one. The wrong bookmark.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' S-H-O-T-A.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I know, I just get the wrong bookmark for...place I wi-for like...dictionary-type website that I have.<br /><br />
''[pause, Chris's keyboard taps are audible]''<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uhhh...Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, now that Julie's done with her question, I also had one.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' He has to find what that means first.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, ''I'm sorry''.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Shit, ah shit, I've just found it on Wikipedia. It's, uh, it's a ma-it's a Japanese name. It's a name of a person. In Japan.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Really.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a Japanese name. I think it's-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh no no, I think you're looking at the wrong thing, it's S- S-H-O-T-A-C-O-N.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> S-H- I mean- O-T-A-C-O-N? Shotacon?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's the same thing, just put C-O-N at the end.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I've read it in a dictionary before, can't remember what it means...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, oh! Okay, here it is, uh..."shotacon, sometimes shortened to shota, is Japanese slang of the phrase 'Shotaro Complex'"...uh..."that describes the attraction to young boys or an individual with such an attraction".<br /><br />
''[Disgusted reactions heard]''<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh my god, what the fuck?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' There's lots of sick people. Y'all are gonna get ricked?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Someone from 4 cent garbage came in and told us to look that up, I didn't-I didn't even want to.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess he's a homo...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Don't worry I banned him already.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Um, Chris, Vivian wants to know if you can like, turn your radio down a bit, it's distracting.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yes, please turn it down.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I thought that was quiet enough, here.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh, no, the lady'll probably pick it up<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Alright cool. Merci.<br /><br />
<br />
===10:21 Another fan asks about art supplies===<br />
<br />
'''Another Fan:''' Okay, um, I have a question, um, I like to draw—interrupted by mumbling—I like to draw comics and such, I mean I want to start up a webcomic. What kind of materials do you use?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, like, you mean for drawing?<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Yes.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well mostly I just use like, uh, paper without lines, like, computer printer paper you can get in, like, Wal-Mart, for an inexpensive price in multiples.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then I use like an RES—RSVP-brand pen with the black ink.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh okay, is it like, um, a gel pen or a ballpoint pen or-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like a ballpoint, it's like a ballpoint pen.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' What do you use to color?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I use Crayola brand markers.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would like to—I would—I would—I would recommend getting the Super Tip 50-pack which you can also find at the Wal-Mart.<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Oh, okay. I-[interrupted by someone else on chat]<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's basically-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' At Wal-Mart I usually get the 24-color RoseArts. Those are—those do pretty good too.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhh, Vivian, just so you—just so you know, I'm using the microphone that came with Hey You, Pikachu for Nintendo Sisty-Four [sic].<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, yeah no, no offense, but uh, personally I prefer like, colored pencils and shit cause-[Chris mumbling is heard]-they're like easier to erase. Photoshop [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If you want to use colored pencils that's fine, I'm not, uh, saying that you have to use Crayola markers-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why don't you use colored pencils? They're really good, you should try one on like, at least one page, just try one. One page with just colored pencils.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But um, actually, you can—you can scan your drawings and then color—color them in like, Photoshop or something. [rest of chat murmurs in agreement] That looks really professional, and really good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I prefer using the markers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's just that I-I mean—I mean I've tried—I mean I've colored with colored pencils before, and I just feel best with using markers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I have a question, um, uh, the Hey You Pikachu microphone, how does that work on the, you're using that on your computer? Did you say?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah it's just, yeah, it's like you plug it into uh, into the basic microphone jack.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh, yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Girl:''' Excuse me, I have a nice little Plantronics headset.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um-<br /><br />
'''Another Fan:''' Hey Chris can I ask you a question?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yeah, hang on a second, uh... uh, Omicron, that's uh, you're basically, uh, you're basically plagiarizing here. You're even using, uh, parts of my original drawings to, uh, make up your so called real ones and, you're just—you're just parroting—you're just plagiarizing-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's dirty and illegal.<br /><br />
[Unintelligible mumbling]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, you said so yourself, you're being illegal. And plus, and plus I'm-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, isn't combining Sonic with Pikachu the same thing?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, but, but, but but also, look at this, also I'm looking at this site here, it said, he's claiming the copyright for himself, but he's, but he's not. I mean that's like, but he's, he—he says<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' You need to ban him immediately.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, ban him immediately.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh wait wait wait wait wait...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah maybe you should check-[interrupted by loud noise, probably Chris]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well he said that, he's saying that all of Sonichu material is copyrighted by him, when it's clearly not.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah but you use Sonic and Pikachu, and you copyrighted it-<br /><br />
'''Other Guy:''' He just offered to give you credit-[interrupted by noisy chatter]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean, I put, I mean, yeah but, I mean, I'm talking about the—the Omnicron [sic] guy here, that's like, just put this link here.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh he offered to give you credit-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes that's the same thing you did.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well no no, he, no-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We decided-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No he's plagiarizing MY Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' We just decided [unintelligible]<br /><br />
'''Foreign Sounding Guy:''' [unintelligible]<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris it's, it's a parody, kinda like Sonichu is.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but he—yeah, but he's saying, he said—he—on his front page he says, all Sonichu material-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah but he's, he just offered to change it, so are you okay with that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> By changing it to Sonichu X-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, he said he'll give you credit instead of claiming it for himself.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, uh, yeah I would appreciate that, that would be better, yeah, if... he changed that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Alright cool.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Problem solved.<br /><br />
<br />
===15:02 Chris talks about dildos to prove his strength===<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes Julie.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Do you think you could tell everyone about my idea? And, since you're going to do it do you think you could tell everyone so they could look out for it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, your idea... um, oh oh oh, yeah, just basically a video of me standing up to Clyde and showing him how strong I am, doin' a few kicks for the camera or something-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, you should throw some punches, show him what you're made of, you know?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Kick, punch, it's all in the mind ''etc.''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I basically... I pretty much did that when I...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Let him talk, c'mon!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I pretty much did - already proved my strength when I... ripped that... ''dildo'' in half.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Foreign-Sounding Guy:''' Most dildos come apart for cleaning.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' C'mon.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but that thing was screwed together at the seam.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok listen to me...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris...<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' Eh Chris!<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ...could you do a like further test of your strength for me?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ''stress sigh'' Yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I wanna see how strong you are please.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...That's fine, I can do that.<br /><br />
'''Other Fan:''' I mean that's ok, you showed your strength, but you should show her your moves. Like show her, like, what kind of moves you can do.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris, let me tell you a story about how this'll work, ok.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' See, my, uh, one of my cousins, uh, this guy at school, kept, y'know, picking on him, calling him gay and stuff, and trying to fight with him, and my cousin told him to sss- y'know, one day, the guy said "Hey man, I'm gonna beat you up" and my cousin said "Look, if I show you some of my moves, I'll prove to you I can kick your ass in a fight" and so my cousin, y'know, he stepped back and, he took, uh, he took Tae Kwon Do, and he did a couple moves, y'know? He just stood there for like five minutes just doing his moves, and, y'know, some punches and kicks and... The guy just backed right off; he didn't even want to talk to him any more. So I think that should work.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> All right, well I'll try that. I'll try that.<br/><br />
'''Guy:''' All right. Sounds good.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br?><br />
'''Fan:''' You try- you always mention about how you're straight but yet in your video about you crushing a dildo, uh, doesn't that kinda like, y'know, not help your cause?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, it proves I'm straight because...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' But you have a dildo.<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I got it free with an order on adameve.com<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
'''Deep-Voiced Guy:''' But you ''kept'' it and shit. That ain't cool.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' What I don't... Why were there batteries in...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Oh yeah Chris, why ''were'' there batteries in it? Why did you keep it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, I mean...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it wasn't an easy thing for me to sell, right off the bat, or even to make a profit, so...<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In fact in a way it's a good thing I kept it, cause it allowed me to be able to break it, like I did.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yes but why would you keep it?<br/><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Why would you keep it?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I woulda saved it for my sweetheart, if she'd wanted it. To use it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Aaaahhh.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But if I were there wouldn't you prefer the real deal?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Some things that metal just can't replace.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> ...Yeah.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I heard that.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' You didn't use it did you?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No I did not.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Did you just throw all the ones you had away?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I only had that one. And there you go, I ri- there you go, I broke it apart.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you just, like, ''take'' it apart, I mean, it did...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' ...seem to come apart, like, screwed on...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I did not take it apart, that thing was glued at the seam. I had to put a lot of strength into breaking it at the middle there.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, but I think, um, showing your moves would be better.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Right.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Clyde would mess with you if you show him you can kick his ass.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey, Chris's a muthafuckin' ''gangsta''!<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Blap blap.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yes, Chris will fuck Clyde's shit up.<br /><br />
(awkward pause)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait, Chris, didn't you say you used a - didn't you say you used scissors to break the dildo?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh! Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I pretty much did have to so I could break that ''glued seam''.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh, I thought you broke it with your hands.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well I- yeah well I would have but it was dang glued at the seam, so I clipped straight in with the scissors I had.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's a pair of Super Shears from [[Cutco]].<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(feigning interest)'' Huh.<br /><br />
<br />
===19:50 Chris defends his Rule 34===<br />
<br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah, let's talk about something else. Uh, Chris?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whenever the announcement of the adult Sonichu page, when I looked at your gallery, very nice stuff, you know, I see a picture of what looks like you with a Sonichu, uh, medallion. Like, and, who's that one girl, exactly?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Who, [[Megan]]?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I thought it was, like, [[Crystal]], cause of the hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, it was - it was originally drawn to be Megan but I censored her eyes to, uh, port- to protect her identity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Mmmmmm.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ''(laughing)'' That's stupid! (?) That's so silly.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I drew that after I found the ED page in November.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Didn't you say that?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> In protest against it.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thought you were going to get rid of it anyway.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I tore up the original drawing, I, in- into squares, and I put in in an envelope.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you upload it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Why did you do that shit? Like, and...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I understand Rosechu, but, like y'know, why, like, something that's from real life. That's the problem (?)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's not necessarily from real life, it depends on you inter- it depends on your interpretation, I mean it's hardly- I mean, '''most women have long brown hair, and the eyes are censored''', so...<br/><br />
(laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''Most'' women?!?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I remember in that one video you were saying it was Megan.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Because it broke, because it end up, because it the end it broke up my friend - broke up my friendship eve, my uh, friendship with Megan.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Um, can I ask you a question? In the third picture, with [[Angelica Rosechu]], what is... what's happening, is... God... doing...?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nope. She's masturbating. And she's enjoying it.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> But she has no hands there. How's she doing it?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' She's ''enjoying'' it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But she does... She does...<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah but how's she doing it? She doesn't have her hands there.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> She does have her hands, she's... ''(stress sigh)'' She's... like most women would be able to do the same thing.<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I thing it's the angle, Julie. I think it's the angle you were looking at it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah plus uh, the picture wasn't, uh, very - wasn't as clear as, like, you know, I would have liked to have had it, uh, I mean, I had that file for a while, and it...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah some of those are kinda blurry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, some deg- some degraded.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> ? a good question, have you drawn anything... of... have you drawn anything like that with me? Cause I would actually like to see, if you did. If so, could you, and let me see? I, uh, sorry, that's very rude to ask.<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm sorry, let me answer this guy. Yeah, well, I made a retraction video later saying that I- I disowned that address.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ah, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Just after that guy hacked into it and changed to it to suck. And as such.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hang on, I'm gonna take a look at that... My Youtube...<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' I like this song.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What song?<br/><br />
'''Fan:''' The song that's playing in the background of, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris, what do you think of, uh, what do you think of that guy who advertises products, Billy Mays? What do you think of him?<br/><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmmm... Billy... Oh! Yeah he's an ok guy, I watched him on Home Improvement.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Billy Mays?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, that was another guy on Home Improvement, Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No that was the same guy. That was the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Really?!? Let's look up. IMDB, go. ''(sound of typing)''<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Believe me, it's the same guy.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, I really enjoyed your, um, adult, uh, section of the site.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... okey dokey, very good. Aaahh, trying to figure out how to update the link on this thing here. Oh, maybe under here. Oh there it is, thank God (?), update right now.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' ''(singing)'' You spin me right round baby, right round...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (joining in) Like a record baby, right round round round<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It's a classic, I can't help in man.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There you are, updated. It's finally fixed.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Actually that was Richard Karn on Home Improvement, not Billy Mays.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Well my mistake, I mean the guy had the beard and uhh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh yeah I can understand.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And the voice sounds- and the voice sounds the same...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah. They sound the same.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I guess.<br /><br />
(incoherent: too many people)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There's a matter of interpretation apparently I misinterpreted so I will admit that I was wrong.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah see we all make mistakes, don't be too hard on yourself.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unintelligible babble or singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you gotten any fan art submissions or notable? For the uh- webpage?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I got one today... It's like mostly a drawing of that uh that uh- of the fan herself.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -got in the snail mail today.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -Sunday.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh. Hmmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What are you doing for this Valentine's day Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhhm... I'm sorry, what was that question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' What will you be doing this year on Valentine's day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm depends...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ahhh, I see.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm.<br /><br />
Fan: Surely a man of such magnitude as yourself are going to be doing something important, aren't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Magnitude? Way to choose the words buddy.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Vocabulary talent.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, cause I don't have Julie over here yet.<br /><br />
(Reactions of OHs and AHs)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If she was here...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible) -play games.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Or we could just uh... talk.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Ehehehehe. Maybe... uh... why no redheads?<br /><br />
'''Other Woman:''' Yeah?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I was trying to think about that when the other guy asked that question. Uh... I was trying to think up that unh... mmmm... Uhhhh, redheads just don't be very- tract me so much.<br /><br />
Several: Uh, ah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's- it's- a- pi- a possibility that they're dyed.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmmmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> But yeah y'know natural redheads enh, yeah, just don't really turn me on as much.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I see...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Have you thought about girls with um, highlights?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... (pause) aaahhhh... what turns me on hhh- (inhales) (pause) obviously the women.<br /><br />
'''Man:''' Gotta have the women. (?)<br /><br />
'''Guy''': What about piercings or tattoo?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, neither of those.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ehhhh-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Hey Chris! How bout like non-orange hair, not like... no, never mind. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah... oh... okay... hmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Wait Chris! How do you feel about blue hair?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Blue hair's okay, otherwise I wouldna- Otherwise I wouldn't've liked Sailor Mercury.<br /><br />
'''British? guy:''' That is true, she does have blue hair.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' She's a very fine character. There is no way to deny it.<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Blue hair is OFF DA HOOK!!!<br/><br />
<br />
===28:35 Chris impersonates various cartoon characters===<br />
<br />
'''British??? guy:''' Doesn't Marge Simpson have blue hair as well?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (in some kind of insane voice) Oh yeah! Marge Simpson has blue hair and it's as tall as the Empire State building!!!<br /><br />
(Some HMMs UHs and UMs follow)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yo Chris!! Can you do some impersonations for us?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Oh we'd love to hear that!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just did Marge Simpson.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah you're really talented.<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(Several people talking at once)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> -they're really good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Do another SimpsonsChris, how about Comic Book Guy?<br /><br />
'''British??? Guy:''' Mmmmhmmm...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh I'm very indeed. Oh aren't we all promiscuous and whatnot. I like Batman and Robin, oh look! Stan Marsh has come into the thing again - I forget that guy's name, that guy who did the Marvel comics.<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Stan Lee. (Pause) Chris do your Donald Duck impression.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Everybody have fun (incoherent and scary quacking)<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris you should work for Disney.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That's good Chris.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Have you ever considered being a voice actor?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Errrrrp... possibly, I'm not sure.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (incoherent, cut off by Chris)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (incoherent... another cartoon voice)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris, you're a Christian, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I was just wondering-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahm actu-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -do you just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm actually a Methodist church.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome, I was just wondering: Do you think AIDS was sent by god to kill the homos or do you think that it's just an accident or something man-made?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thou- the thought never occurred to me... thought never occurred to me.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' can you do an impression of Arnold Schwarzenegger?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hold- the question...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Let Chris answer the question.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> The thought- the thought never occurred to me about what you just said about the AIDS there mmmm... but y'know, it's a possibility and I will not agree nor disagree with it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, I was just wondering I mean, I've had that discussion with some of my Christian friends. I just wanted to get your opinion, thank you.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmhhh...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I think (clears throat) I think Omicron has a point and you did tell me you went to a methodist church didn't you? So that's-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well th- well my Methodist church is uh more loose on- is not as strict on uh- on uh sex.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris I don't know- I don't know that much about religion in the States but I don't think there is a looser Meth- Methodist church. God makes the rules Omicron says.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, hmmm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well, you know personally I think that the government made AIDS to kill off all the brothers.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Whoa, whoa... That's what the blacks always say.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah. (pause) I'm going to agree, that sounds like something that uh... well, a black guy would say.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So your church is kinda of uh- they let you do- their kinda loose on the whole moral restrictions?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... (pause) uhhh... that's... what's the question?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Your church they- you said they're kind of more uh- y'know they're less strict on the whole moral thing, like, as far as sexuality goes? Right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> -ah basically.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But y'know, uhh, I thought you're supposed to listen to the Bible or whatever not, y'know, not necessarily- no, never mind.<br /><br />
(Pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Hey Chris-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (interrupts)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, there's also a uh, there's also a- think about this uh, if you uh- if you- if you were a think uh- you have to find for yourself a good meaning behind uh- good meaning behind watching pornography to uh- like teach how it- how to do this and that when you actually get around to doing it...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's all ???<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's all's considered education for yourself.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' How is that realistic at all?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, it's uh- not a really good thing to learn from, trust me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It can be done before marriage as well as long as me and my sweetheart really love each other very much.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' But not in Christianity.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' But all I'm saying is y'know, porn is completely, completely unre- unrealistic I mean you can't really learn anything from it.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It gives- it gives you enough ideas.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unclear)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (incoherent) porn.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' When you actually have sex, it's nothing like porn.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe not like you, you not gonna do it-<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' You can't do it immediately- immediately anal sex cause most women are not very happy with anal sex and also...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Okay, shut up<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' -and also weird-<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Shut up.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Yes.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And... that wasn't cool, like...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' That was uncalled for...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah, like, suthin' a BLACK MAN would say...<br /><br />
'''Several:''' (incoherent)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' That's racist man...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, somebody said it on here first before I did.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Does that make it ok?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris, I think he's trying to make it clear that- I dunno.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I typically agree with that guy.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> So nothing g- it doesn't make it ok.<br /><br />
(incoherent)<br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling) I wi- I'm sorry, I take it back.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(unclear)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Guys can we get back to Sonichu, Please?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah this is getting ridiculous.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' (unclear) -Sonichu actually.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Anyway, my question is that: why does Sonichu not wear clothes while Rosechu and the other Rosechus do wear clothes? And underwear?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Aaaaaaaaaamp... It's like uh- it's basically a cartoon and it doesn't really matter, it's like... mm... think about this: Most cartoon characters wear at least one article of clothing. At least one article. And uh- it's like Yogi Bear who just wears a necktie and a hat.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 35.14)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Other Guy:''' I think it would be cool if all the Sonichus and Rosechus got together and they and- they all formed a big team and they had special uniforms or something, kinda like the X-men.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Or Power Rangers.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh yeah, I don't do- I don't do well- I'm not in- no uniforms. It's a uniform and other Sonichus and Rosechus.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I'm just wondering if you'd do another impression: What does Blachu sound like? Uh, Black Sonichu? Or Blake?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eeeeuuunh... Eh... ahhhh...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Can you imitate it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... I'm not sure... uhhhhm...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Like does he sound black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Possibly, but I'm not certain. I'm not leaning towards it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I'd like to hear it, but if you don't want...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just never- I just never really thought about that. I'd say that he possibly sounds similar to uh, y'know Shadow the hedgehog. But he could possibly sound, black. He could. Don't quote me on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' All right, I was just wondering if you'd do his voice but...<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Hey why does the BAD guy gotta be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I never said the bad guy "has to" be black. (pause) I mean, look at the- the range of villanies, I mean there's black and whites and uh... male females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I noticed that uh- Silvana's also... black lookin'.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I just decided to color her black because she was born- she came from outer space from a black egg, which was the- which came out of the rainbow.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah, I was also wonderin' about that like-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I- I- I-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' If Silvana came out of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes it's-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Why would she be black?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (babbling)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' I mean like black ain't part of the rainbow, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It's like the black sheep of the family. Y'know you put all the colors together and it does become black.<br /><br />
(unintelligible reactions)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -like a brownish-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) is a (unintelligible) color.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Maybe it's because she's from space and there's not a lot of light in space and it's dark or something.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah that- a uh yeah- that's one of the-<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hmmm.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhm, did you look at the link of my friend?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, ummmm...<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Yeah, since you love blue hair.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh- no I haven't looked at it and I don't wanna make Julie feel jealous if I did- if I went and did.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I don't think Julie would mind.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Uhhh...<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You look at pornography don't you?<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' (mumble)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, that- that was two syllables "Rose-chu". You don't- don't add- don't say the "e" it's just "Rosechu".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah you went over this last chat.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span>(I don't know, it sounds like "narrator")<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (sounds like he says "narrator" again)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Uh... I was just-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, well, obviously the uh- the narrator who did those audio books was incorrect. Specially since I never gave that person the approval to do the audiobooks.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think it's just a fan project and I think he-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' and I think he might have one of the West coast dialects. I know that the South they say y'all but over here-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well obviously he lied-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -different. I'd be proud if they made one of my projects into an audiobook though. That means that there are a lot of fans out there that really like it.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Ay.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' They're not selling to try and make any money off it. They're not trying to rip you off. They always made sure- they always narrate the first page by saying "Christian Weston Chandler" so they're not trying to cheat you or anything.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' The people know you're making it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I- I hear that. I just, apparently they misin- misinterpreted the (audio breaks up) name Rosechu. Or mispronounced it. Misinterpreted, mispronounce- fairly the same thing in that situation... possibly. To answer that question... possibly.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Uh, Vivian said that the audiobooks made Sonichu way popular that- than you could ever ever do on your own.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I will not disagree with the statement. And I appreciate her help.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hey Chris. Would you be offended if a fan wrote a fanfiction about Sonichu?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Faaanfiction... if it's- if it's not demeaning or makes them look stupid. Then it's fine- it's fine. (pause) Like I did mind when, shoot, what's his name? That guy... uhhhh... that guy that the uhhhh... did the animations, on his computer.<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' You did mind or you didn't?<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Animations???<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I think I know what he's talking about. Are you talking about the um...<br /><br />
<br />
(background noise begins)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' Well the original play was a Greek play. Where they're all y'know... Greeks... and crazy stuff happens and they're all runnin' around in togas. So if you ever wanna see the movie "A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum" it was a classic and it had some real classic people from the 50s and 60s in it. Kinda like "It's a MAD MAD MAD MAD World". Sort of a classic old school movie from funny old school world. First color movie type thing. But that'll be a high school play. You'll wanna see that. You might actually enjoy it. (unintelligible)<br /><br />
(inaudible response)<br /><br />
''Background voice:'' You never know that might be fun to do. Well I guess that wouldn't work on the weekend then... you gotta...<br /><br />
<br />
'''(FOR THOSE OF YOU WONDERING WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON, IT APPEARS THAT THERE WAS SOME TECHNICAL PROBLEM THAT CAUSED ANOTHER MUMBLE CHANNEL TO BE RECORDED WHILE THE CONVERSATION WITH CHRIS BECAME BARELY AUDIBLE BACKGROUND NOISE. INSTEAD ALL THAT CAN BE HEARD IS SOME BUTTFACE YAMMERING ABOUT FILMS AND TELEVISION SHOWS. I'M NOT GOING TO KEEP TRANSCRIBING IT. CHRIS IS STILL TALKING AND ANSWERING QUESTIONS, BUT NOTHING CAN BE UNDERSTOOD OVER THESE GUYS.)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''(AT 42.56 THE AUDIO SUDDENLY RESUMES NORMALLY)'''<br /><br />
<br />
'''Unknown person:''' Uh you-<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yeah I uh- noticed he's another BLACK villain.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah in real life he was black. Without meaning any offense to the uh- black guy in general, cause you've noticed, among the Jerkops there's uh- we got black's and white's, males and females.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
(several people jump in at once)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' (unintelligible) -you've never drawn a female officer before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well y'know uhhh... uhhh, comic book number 7, near the end. Near the end of the time travel episode. Uhh, I have no opinion about what Obama's doing cause I don't watch the news.<br /><br />
Accented woman: But you voted for him, didn't you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes I voted for him because I saw myself in him when I com- when I saw both the documentaries and downloaded them for the Playstation Network between Obama and McCain. I mean voted for a person I saw more of myself of-<br /><br />
Accented woman: You usually vote for someone based on their political leanings, not how you view them. As I were Republican, I voted for John McCain. Not because I liked him but because I- he had the same political views as me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basi- basically I'm a moderate.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh, I see. Um, I was wondering. I was reading opinions: do you agree with his financial bailouts?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hm, I don't even know what it is. So I can't disagree or agree.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Well, to make it short um, it's about uh- the government- President Obama is planning to uh- a new one- (cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry what?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' You got cut off there.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Uhh, ok, we lost him.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Black guy:''' Yo, Chris, uh, do you, you didn't just vote for Obama cause he was black, did you?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, I did not vote for him because he was black. I voted for him cause I saw myse- because I saw myself in him. In like, similar lifestyles. And I saw that he was a good man, I mean after all, com- I saw- I saw I watched both of the A&E documentaries, before I can- before I knew who I would vote for.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 45.29)'''<br /><br />
<br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Chris:, Chris what did you see in him that you say in your self?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Like for one thing we were like outcasts, at least one point in our lives.<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Wait, wait hold up earlier you said that you thought he would probably paint the white house black.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh oh that was my father’s joke he said that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Is your father a racist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but you see I drew that for him before I saw the documentaries so respectfully withdrew that comic page.<br /><br />
'''???:''' does your father hate black people.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Not necessarily but it’s just how my father just how my father that does not reflect in any way that’s how he felt (annoying ass noise in the background)<br /><br />
'''Black man:''' Man that racist.<br /><br />
'''??? :''' Hey Chris I so the ahh saw the Sonichu and Rosechu love sack that you put up and I thought if was pretty cool for (you adult friends?) I just had a question though: do you have any plans in the comic to have romance between you and one of the hedgehogs I mean-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Yelling) No no no<br /><br />
'''???:''' -we would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' I mean is was just wondering because there are fans how would like to see that.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Now- now that you answered the his question my kind of relates to his what are your thoughts on inter racial breeding and marriages?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I would not agree of disagree with them but in my personal preference I would fell- I would feel more comfortable in having a full relationship with a white woman but I am willing- am still willing to be friends and acquaintances and give and have respect for the black women as well.<br /><br />
'''???:''' What about Asians like Japanese?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I’m ok with them as well (yelling) a once.<br /><br />
'''???:''' So would you get married with a Japanese woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hhhmmmm I would have, yes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' (unintelligible)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> but I’m giving Julie to opportunity here.<br /><br />
'''Clyde:''' Julie’s a lucky woman.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris is Silvana gonna become one of the good guys like Blake before?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There’s a possibility but I have not confirmed that yet.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Is she gonna get the male sexual parts and become a full-fledged woman?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhhmmm possibly but I haven’t given that thought either.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Also um reading (?Phillip’s?) question what did you want to be when you were little?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don’t remember, I do not remember I’m just making it as I go basically.<br /><br />
'''???:''' is there ever gonna be an end to your sonichu series like a finally.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> hmmmm I don’t know ,probably would not.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Oh so it keeps going and going?<br /><br />
???: You ever consider making comic about the history of CWCville?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hhmmmm an episode dedicated to that possibility.<br /><br />
'''???:''' Hey Chris are you going to keep the name changes that you made or are you going back to the original names?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ahhh ya I’m keeping the name changes.<br /><br />
'''???:''' But you know umm Nintendo was umm they sent you a letter you never really talk about it further.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah but at less at less they use to benefit me for the fact that allowed me to fix noting in that since I couldn’t be sued by such people in that since so the name change is for good.<br /><br />
<br />
'''(From 50 min)'''<br /><br />
<br />
(scattered reactions)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> So the name changes were good.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' So uh, Chris I was wondering if uh Mary- Mary Lee Walsh Or I guess the new name: Ryam Sla- I don't know-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Sla-weel.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Slaweel, thank you. Uhm, if she were to use her magic to curse Rosechu with a penis, what- wou- would that test the relationship between Sonichu and her? While they were fighting the battle to have it removed.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh... Firstly uh, she does not- she does not have the power ch- to do that.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Ok, I just thought you know, remember you did the story about 4-cent-garbage and drawing all the- the picture and-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Ah you what, that's one- that's one thing: drawing them, but not actually putting them on the character.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Cause I think that would be like an epic story though-<br /><br />
Fan: I'll second that.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' to have a quest to go to have that penis removed from Rosechu. I mean it's a test of romance between her and Sonichu.<br /><br />
(muttering)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' And when that prevails and the penis is removed and everybody- everybody lives happily ever after. Y'know that would be awesome.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnnnnnh, I dunno I have to- I dunno I have to think about that.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' It is a really good idea. I mean I like it.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I do too.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Yeah, that's good.<br /><br />
Other fan: It could show just how much Rosechu means to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I'll- I'll consider it but I'm not making any promises.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' We understand.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(several talking at once)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' -decided on that subject?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm working on it.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' If you actually decide to go forward with that story? Do you think maybe- maybe you could give her a talking penis?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!!!<br /><br />
(laughter from various people)<br /><br />
(unintelligible responses)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Ok, I think- I think we've talked enough about that one guys.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I have a question that doesn't involve penises.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Anyway, my question is since we've been hearing lot of vicious lies and slander about this, could you confirm exactly why you've been fired from your job at Wendy's Chris? Cause we've been hearing all sorts of- of crazy things and we wanna know the truth.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmmmmmm... well, firstly, what have you heard?<br /><br />
'''Other guy:'''Well we heard that uh you... we've heard so many things like you helped a small child and you did a Donald Duck impersonation and you scared the child.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... also that- also that is correct but I did not scare the child. The child was tired, I was only- I was only trying to make the child feel better. That's a little amusement. But I did not make the child cry, the child was already- was just tired.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' So you didn't help them cut their food and... yeah...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I did help them- help them get their food to- by giving them uhh, by giving them bags and a top for their baked potato boat.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris, when will um, the pictures of Zapina, um, appear on the 18 plus page?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that was a deleted scene! That was a deleted scene.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Why was it deleted?<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, basically, hhh... y'c- y'cant' really have it if you don't have Rosechu working to take the- working to take the pictures of herself up in the bathroom. Cause like can't have one without the other.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaahhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' I don't know if this is a good question but there's something I wonder about that- we kind of have this DVD you made and... we never unfortunately got... but I'm curious um... do you ever plan to release it?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Maybe.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' I'd pay money for that, I think everyone else here would probably pay money for it too.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Indeed.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' (breaking up) I wanna ask a question.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' I hear it's also on YouTube.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Chris do you know that you've influenced the rap/hip hop community?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmh... uh.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' I just wanted to mention that because I saw some YouTube videos and it- and- and from some underground hip hop artists such as ??? and they've sampled some of your voice audio complaining about your struggles with uhm... with the school board, with the security guards and they were- they felt so empowered that they actually took those words and mad'em into a very powerful rap song. How does that- how is your reaction to that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhhhh... basically I have not watched those videos so... I don't have an opinion.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Well, I will provide you a link to that, hold on a moment.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh that's ok, actually I uh, did sample one. The one where they basically played the parody from "Can't touch this".<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' No, no, see it's waaay more serious than that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well I still haven't heard of- heard of what you're talking about.<br /><br />
(unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Nevermind.<br /><br />
(rustling and moving noises)<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do an impression of MC Hammer?<br /><br />
(more clicking and rustling)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Can't touch this do do do doo do dooo Can't touch this! Do do do dooo do do do... can't touch this.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Oh awesome.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' That was- heheheh.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Awesome.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you- can you do Dr. Nick Riviera from the Simpsons?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> HIIII EVERYBODY!<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hello Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Hi Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Hi Christian Chandler.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that should say Dr. Nick cause that's who I'm imitatin'.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Yeah.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''???:''' That uh-<br /><br />
'''???:''' HELLOOO EV'RYBODY!!!!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Well that-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hi Dr. Nick!<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Thank you, I love the Simpsons.<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Can you do... Peter from Family Guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enhenhenhenh... Hey Lois! Look at me! I'm just (unclear) you nose, and I'm eatin' your nose.<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Oh that's dead on.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Oh would you- Omicron's been interested in tis- would you actually make a documentary like- like your other DVD but make your daily life?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmm... I'm... yeah I might but uh... I'm not su- I'm not sure bout it at the moment.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Aaaaaaaaanh...<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' Chris can you do Mario? You know from Super Mario?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hay paisano! How you doin' mistah hedgehog!<br /><br />
'''Guy:''' That's very good.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then Sonic- then Sonic would say "what?!?"<br /><br />
(giggling)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris do you have any plans to make a video of yourself taking a dump on a Hexbox?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No! That's gross.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Yeah that was pretty sick right there.<br /><br />
'''Accented woman:''' Let's ban him.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's bad enough I cut in half with an axe.<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> and one of the elevator jokes...<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Oh we remember that, that was a classic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And I earned a trophy for that.<br /><br />
'''Woman:''' Mmmm...<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' Yeah, I remember that, it was destroying a Hexbox by cutting it in half if I remember...<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' If I were to draw nude Zapina fanart, uhm, would you put them on the site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Mmmm... uhh, your- you uh- free to draw them at your- at your own- own preference, but I will not be- I will not put it on the website because- cause- because I will not want to break any laws of having underage portrayals- portrayals of underage nudity.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Isn't Dot a child?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry... what?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Dot, from Animaniacs.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> (unintelligible)<br /><br />
'''British guy:''' So-uh- uhm- I think I looked up somewhere that um, drawings do not count, they're just lines on paper not like real pictures that are horrible.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah I believe-<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Draw-<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' (cut off)<br /><br />
'''Other guy:''' Those illustrations do not count as child pornography. Because with drawing it's art- it's artistic merit.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Welll... I dunno, I guess it depends I have to- but- y'know you could do the drawing and I'll think- I'll consider it.<br /><br />
(typing noises)<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Hey Chris, would it be possible to get any pictures of Sonichu having anal sex with Rosechu?<br /><br />
(pause... thumps and feedback)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm considering that but...<br /><br />
'''Accented woman''' Who keeps letting this person in? You are very offensive.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' -and and, if you draw those, do you think that Rosechu would actually clean Sonichu's penis off with her mouth (laugh) w-when they're done?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Unnnhh...<br /><br />
(pause)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Nah, no, I don't think so, I think- I think- I think it would be unh- yeah w-wash it off with a washcloth.<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Do you think in, at that point then they would sell the washcloth on EBay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's stupid!<br /><br />
(people talking over each other)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no, no, no more party humor, all right?<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Yeah alright, okay<br /><br />
'''Fan:''' Unrelated to party humor, I want to ask that in your Springbreak uhh Issue of Sonichu you had an introduction of a, of new character, the [[Yawning Squirtle|squirtle]] and I wanna ask<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:''' (interrupting)</span> No, that's, no, no, no, that's not just a character, I was, I was not introducing a new character, I was just doing like a poster thing for a bubble speak under one, I thought I just draw some water type pokemon un-in there<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I understand but the thing is there is huge cult following for that character and I strongly suggest that you should capalize on that and, and make him to a main character<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Eh... No, I don't think so<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I mean it's just sleeping Squirtle work waking up<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I don't know, people just thought he was really cute and yawning Squirtle, I don't know, I heard someone say, man wouldn't it be great if he would be that [[Autistic|dopey]] sidekick that he'd come and they'd be like, like, he'd come in and say something silly after someone did something and they would be like Squirtle!<br /><br />
People laughing and talking over each other<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Ehm...<br /><br />
???: Yo, it makes you *unintelligible* (Chris and someone talk over another)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, yes Julie?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> I'm asking you about... Hm... Never mind, I lost my train of thought. I'm sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's okay. These guys made me lose a train of thought as well. Doesn't multiple inputs.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yes, kinda lotta control here. I may have to... never mind<br /><br />
Silence<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I never lose my train of thought because I have a GPS tracking system on it.<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, that was a good joke. (chuckle)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, could you tell us a joke right now. Just any joke.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay, here is a fuck - here is a funny ...here is a funny mind scream. Funny rhyme scheme - not to be taken literally:<br /><br />
On your Game Boy Advance SP<br /><br />
create cher ME<br /><br />
den play da WII<br /><br />
with your PSP<br /><br />
hooked to your PS3<br /><br />
cause it's fun<br /><br />
see?<br /><br />
And never ff, and never play a [[Hex Box]] 360<br /><br />
Because it's stupid and you're not a dummy (in childlike voice)<br /><br />
Mock laughter<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Is that something you made up?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I made that up<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Chris, Chris, can I write that down and tribute to quote you that? Oh man, that's good<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) So you mean to type it up and you quote me on the rhyme scheme?<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Yeah, I'd like that. I've been thinking about making a quote book like a mini Chris quote book like something you could open and have a cool line to say when you're on a party and you're like right things<br /><br />
People talking over Chris and Alucard<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, well I'm typing it up for Alucard, so...<br /><br />
'''Alucard''': Thank you<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span>Chris, can we hear one more?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Here is an [[Christian's sex joke|adult joke]] I once come up<br /><br />
'''Fan''': This is going to be good!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> There was this married couple, Bob and Jane, and they have been looking forward to having children. So, one night, Bob comes home from work, and Jane says, "Hi, you had a good day, dear?" And he says, "Nah, I felt alone, darling" And she said, "Well, it's okay, why don't we go upstairs, and we'll have some Breakfast." "Breakfast, at Nine p.m.?" And she says, "Sure, you bring the MILK, and I'll get an EGG."<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yo, I heard that before, man<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> And then later, they had a boy and a girl, Junior Bacon and Orange Juice. All Part of a Balanced Breakfast.<br /><br />
[[Image:Tumbleweed.gif]]<br /><br />
Perplexed silence<br />
<br />
'''Fan''': Hey, Chris, how do you solve a Mexican tank?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Stand in front of it?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': No, man, shoot the guys pushing at it<br /><br />
Laughter<br /><br />
'''Fans''': Oh that's a good one<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' I got one<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get a bunch of [[Niggos|blacks]] in a car?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I don't know.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Throw some chicken in.<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' How do you get them out of the car?<br /><br />
'''Other fan:''' Job application<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What do you call a beach of black people buried up to their necks?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Afro-turf.<br /><br />
'''Fans''': (laughter)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I came up with one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what's the difference between a black man and a pizza?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': A pizza can feed a family of four.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': How do you stop black people from jumping on a bed?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, enough racist jokes.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''':Put velcro on the ceiling.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Enough, enough black jokes.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, uh Chris.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Sorry<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I showed by friend that over 18 site, and he said, that he um, he um, you know he, he masturbated to it. Does that make you feel (interrupted)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's good, that's basically the reaction I would be going for. Among the male ca... among the male population, being attracted to the women.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But those are your drawings, it's like, I think he's gay now. I mean, you're a guy and you drew those.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm drawing, I'm drawing female characters.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yah, but it's drawn by you and you're, like, I don't know. It's kind of awkward for me.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hey Chris, I actually need to thank you, the pictures on that site, it looked like the camera was inside Sonichu's penis when Rosechu was giving him a blowjob. That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. I've always wanted to have a camera in my penis so that I could see that if I ever got a blowjob, that would be awesome, I just wanted to say thank you very much for that perspective. It's the first time I've ever seen it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': There's a question here on the site, oh sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, well I see it... no I don't basically masturbate to my own drawings.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But you're okay if other people do, right? Even guys?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm sorry, what?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You're okay if other people, you know, masturbate to your drawings? Even if they're guys, right?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> If the guys are masturbating to the female drawings, then yes, that's fine.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I just thought it was kind of awkward, but maybe I'm seeing it a different way.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I doubt that, uh, having a whole bunch of drawings of naked female characters can be misinterpreted as something else.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yes?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': I want to ask you a question.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': One time, a friend and I were looking at porn together, and we masturbated together, but the porn was straight, ordinary porn. Is this gay?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, I'm sorry, where you looking at naked women?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Yes, but we were in the same room, masturbating.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, if you both were thinking about the naked women you were looking at, then I would definitely say you both are straight, cuss you're not thinking about each other, you're thinking about the women.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Right. <br /><br />
'''Fan''': Would you do that with someone?<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': I'm relieved.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Man, nigger you gay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Shut up. Would you do that with someone? Like a guy?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No, no I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Nah, I'm straight dog.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah I'd, yeah I'd rather not.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Omnicron has a question on here, on the side here.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You see it, or?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No. That's not straight.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Alright, what about the earlier question.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, the one before.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uh, which one before? Oh, you mean...<br /><br />
(All talk at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, what do you think about.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Wait, wait let him answer.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Let him answer that one.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I was gonna rephrase it but okay.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'd say it would depend on your interpretation, what is adultery to you?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But, you know, isn't the Bible only supposed to be interpreted, it's the word of God, you're not really supposed to interpret it any other way.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': It is what it is.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': It's in English.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Uhhh, I have no comment.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, that's what my, uh, you know I was talking about my mom saw those drawings. I mean, not the drawings, the posters, the playboy posters and that's basically what she got bad about. She said I was committing adultery.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah okay, if you don't want to talk about it, fine.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, hmmm, I think you shou, I think you should, uh, when you, I think I can see where this could be interpreted one way or another, it depends on how you look at the woman. I mean, alright, you're looking at the, uh woman, you might be imaginin' her naked, but, I mean, you would respe, I mean, you would, you would still respect, I mean, if you were still respecting that woman, you would appreciate her more for like who she was aside or in addition to the (something), that's not as bad as just, as just only doing it for the appearance.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> That's why, uh, that's why the playboy magazines, they give you the introductions of the women. It's like letting you know who they are (unintelligible).<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, but there weren't any, uh, descriptions under the, yeah never mind.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Thank you for the clarification Chris.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Hey Chris, do you love America?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I'm patriotic.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's good. I was wondering if you could sing the national anthem for us?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> [[Wikipedia:My Country, 'Tis of Thee| My country tis' of thee. Sweet land of liberty. Of thee, of thee I sing.]] I don't remember the rest.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Lands where my fathers died.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Land of the pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Pilgrim's pride.<br /><br />
(Fans all start singing)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Stop it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hey I'll, I'll tell y'all a funny joke that's kind of patriotic.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Alright, you got this, you got this funny, you got this funny Mexican guy, and he just, he just come back home to Meh-he-co after an American visit. He's like (high pitched voice) Oh the people there are so very friendly. I mean, I go to the basketball game. I sit in the back row. I sit in the back row. And then, and then, and then all of, and then all of the sudden right before the game started, everyone turned around, put their hands on their chests, and they say, "Oh say can you seeeeee"<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I thought you said no racist jokes?<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': Yeah man, that ain't cool!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was a name, it was a name joke.<br /><br />
(Everyone talks at once)<br /><br />
'''Fan''':...Spanish language<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I'm kind of offended by that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, I'm sorry.<br /><br />
'''Black fan''': That's racist dog. That ain't cool.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That's okay.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': You laugh you support terrorism.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah, what?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What'd you say?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What the hell? Who said that?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Forget it.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I said, you laugh, you support terrorism.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, he's gone.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Awful Mr. T impression) I pity the fool, who try and misinterpret things, and try and jam new words into my mouth.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': You do a good Mr. T<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Yeah you do.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (unintelligible) no jibber jabber.<br /><br />
(Fans laugh)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Chris, did you watch the A-team back in the day?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> No but, no but, basica, but I have seen Mr. T. And then I also, I also saw when he guest starred in an episode of Alvin and the Chipmunks.<br /><br />
(All talk)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I saw that episode, he helped uh Theodore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Theodore was getting picked on.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, you posted a link here.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well at my [[Wesley Memorial United Methodist Church|Methodist church]], uh, sex before marriage is okay as long as, uh, she and I, we love each other very much and truly.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': But that's what they tell you, I'm talking about the word of God.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *Sigh* Okay, I'm getting tired, okay, I'm getting tired here, uh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, but...<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Okay, sorry, no more of that.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#c0f">'''Julie:'''</span> Yeah, you're right. Please stay Chris.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Okay. Alright, I'll stay a little while longer.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, if anyone does, if anyone asks anything that makes him feel uncomfortable, I'm gonna kick you out of the room.<br /><br />
(Everyone speaks)<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I have a Japanese friend, he's, he's actually 26 and he's never had a girlfriend and we asked him some questions, just joking around one day. And we asked him if his, when he gets married, if his wife wanted to sleep with another man, would he be okay with it, and he actually said yes, as long as she wasn't being forced. Now that kind of bothered us, because us Americans, right, we think that marriage, and you know you're with somebody, they should be faithful, but he doesn't seem to think so, so I wanted to see if you had any advice maybe on what we could do to try and convince him that his viewpoint is wrong.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, hmm, it's not necessarily that the viewpoint is wrong. See, the thing is, what, to, to quote, to make it accepta, to make it like as if you're actually cheating on somebody, cheating on your spouse in the marriage, it's like not telling them, not telling him, not telling him or her about it beforehand, but it's like, you know, you, it's like you tell them beforehand and you get their approval, it's, it's okay, even if they don't want to be part of it. But not telling them, that's definitely like cheating on them.<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out)<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well that's another thing I would have to think about, cuss got a bit of a, couple of items of destruction(?) that need to be repaired<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, I just got, I just talked to that one friend I was talking about who, uh, saw your website, the 18 one, and it turns out he's, he's gay, he's actually gay and he fapped, uh I mean he masturbated to, uh, Sonichu.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Hahaha, your friend's a fag.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': And I think he's...<br /><br />
(Audio cuts out for 15 seconds)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': ...about that?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Well, I think in case you would definitely want to let him know that you are straight and you don't want that kind of relationship, and maybe, and you know<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Should I tell him just to get the hell away from your site?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Um, I'm not saying that, but like, uh, you know, you don't want that kind, you don't, I mean that's, that's basically confirmed on that note. So, uh, you want, you still wanna be friends but you don't, but you're not into that kind of thing.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I mean, he was looking at your site, like, the 18 site and he was in like, um,<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Over 18.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': The over 18 site you made. The loveshack. I thought he was just like, you know, masturbating to Rosechu, but it turns out he was attracted to Sonichu.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> *sigh* Uhh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, I don't think I'll be friends with this guy anymore.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah well, yeah, then tell him, yeah, to get the hell out of your house and stay away if you don't want to be friends anymore.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Seems like you know too many gay friends mister.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh shut up.<br /><br />
'''Another fan''': Hey Chris, you know how cologne or perfume, you know, women wear that to try and attract men? Do you think that farts attract gay guys to each other?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Now that's stupid! Not only is that stupid, but it's gross.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Here, I'm gonna take that question and I'm gonna, I'm gonna take that question and spin that into something that's less weird. What would you say the best cologne or whatever a guy could wear to get a girl's attention?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I recommend [[Axe|Axe]] body spray.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh yeah? I think I tried that one time.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': That actually does it for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': What scent do you use?<br /><br />
(All speak)<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Don't you use ass body spray?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Mmm, love it.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Does the Axe effect, does it really exist?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Does Axe exist?<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Yeah, the Axe effect. You know, they say in the commercials spray it and girls will come to you.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': (unintelligible) and it works for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Has it worked for you Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, well, yeah, I, yeah I haven't got that working for me.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': I think it's a scam personally.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': I mean... I mean, Old Spice is pretty good. I had, I had like a couple of girls go up to me asking me for dates with Old Spice.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': I actually wore that Orion sent, uhh, still smelling it. So it will work Chris, you just gotta give it time.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Using the Axe.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Cameron but, isn't Axe spray for men?<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': No no no no no no no, see, see I said a boyfriend, a boyfriend that I met.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Oh, okay.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah. *laughs*<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Perfect sense.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, silly, silly. I have a question for you Chris, what celebrities have you met?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Hmm, oh.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Well what I'm saying is the Axe effect doesn't work. Okay, sorry.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> I haven't actually met any celebrities in person, my real life, unless you count a local radio DJ.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, I've met the DJ of my radio station 95.1 and [[Excel Saga|Monica Rial]], and meeting Monica Rial was just a treat.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Ahhh.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> It was, it was good.<br /><br />
'''Female fan''': Yeah, she's pretty.<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Yeah, yeah.<br /><br />
'''Fan''': Maybe you should go to her and, um, maybe she could be like a contact for voice acting. I mean, you do pretty good imitations.<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Do Homer Simpson!<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> (Homer Simpson impression) Oh, look at me! I'm a stupid old person, derp-de-derp de derp-de-derp, D'OH!<br /><br />
'''Fan''': That was awesome<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': Who else can you do Chris?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> What?<br /><br />
'''Other fan''': What other imitations can you do?<br /><br />
<span style="color:#03f">'''Chris:'''</span> Oh, a lot. It depends on if you name it, I might recall, if you name the person or character I'll, if I can recall my memory than I will imitate that person.<br /><br />
<br />
(transcribing end for now at 1:23:00)<br /><br />
<br />
<br />
{{Transcription}}<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 6|Mumble Chat 6]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 8|Mumble Chat 8]]|}}<br />
<br />
==Links==<br />
* [https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBWklfakp0TGdDSkU Download]<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
<br />
[[Christian's sex joke]] - Used during this chat.<br />
<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_3&diff=163028Mumble 32012-09-26T23:58:46Z<p>Irisviel: /* 00:00:00 Introduction, Audio Fail */</p>
<hr />
<div>'''Mumble 3''' is the third of the [[Mumble]] chats involving [[Chris]]. The date it was held is uncertain, but it was before 10 [[February 2009]].<br />
<br />
Length: '''2:51:34'''<br />
<br />
== Synopsis ==<br />
<br />
__NOTOC__The third Mumble chat begins with with small talk between Chris and [[Julie]], punctuated by loss of audio in places, macaroni cheese, money and passwords. [[Clyde]], at this point, is flashing in and out of the conversation, without actually making an appearance until the later stages. [[Molvanîa]] has been destroyed, it turns out. Julie almost blows her cover a couple of times while referring to "Cameron", who seems to continuously [[Rosechu|change gender]]. We also discover that all of Chris's female creations think that he’s handsome, just like [[Snorlax|Barb]] does. This would appear to be the reason why he [[love quest|can’t understand why he’s single]]. Clyde makes a cameo appearance. Julie is getting paranoid, believing that Clyde is out to get her, and she wants Chris to protect her. Chris seems unworried by Julie voicing her fears about a knife wielding Clyde Cash coming to get her, even when she is sure he's out side her house. Julie and Chris agree to take each other's virginity and imagine their first time together. Chris promises to try hard not to prematurely ejaculate. Clyde appears and reveals he's heard everything. The two threaten and try to psychoanalyze each other. Clyde denigrates Chris's existence and questions in detail how he'll support Julie or even himself, casting serious doubt on Chris's life skills. Clyde forces Chris to make [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|a video saying that he's gay]], threatening to harm Julie if he doesn't.<br />
<br />
== Summary ==<br />
<br />
The chat is quite long, weighing in at nearly two and a half hours, and is one of the longest Mumble chats. It is unknown how the trolls kept Chris on for so long. <br />
<br />
Chief talking points are as follows:<br />
<br />
* Chris and Julie log for a private chat. There appears to be some problem with the audio cutting out.<br />
* Julie blames the global financial crisis for her not being able to visit. Chris accepts this.<br />
* Small talk: Julie is a very good cook. Julie has her [[Sonichu Girls]] password back.<br />
* Julie wants to talk about their relationship.<br />
* Julie fucks up, tipping off Chris that she's a troll. She excuses the mistake on her bad [[English]].<br />
* Chris wants to Google Molvanîa (something he should have done ages ago), but Julie fast-talks him out of it.<br />
* Julie explains that Molvanîa has been destroyed.<br />
* Julie changes the subject and asks about how Virginia is.<br />
* A wild Clyde Cash appears, then disappears without saying a word.<br />
* Chris's alarm goes off, ruining his train of thought. He performs no other action, so presumably the alarm was to remind him to be even more forgetful than usual.<br />
* Julie asks about Chris's parents. He says they are fine.<br />
* Chris drops spoilers about the upcoming Sonichu.<br />
* They talk music. Julie loves Alizée. Chris likes all music, but especially [[Britney Spears]].<br />
* Clyde returns again, but again leaves without saying anything.<br />
* Julie asks Chris if he is attracted to Rosechus. Chris answers by saying [[Chris and reality|they are attracted to him]].<br />
* Chris believes he is handsome but doesn't know why he doesn't have a girlfriend. He says this to Julie, his sweetheart.<br />
* Chris pesters Julie to come visit him, without offering to assist her in anyway.<br />
* Clyde speaks, demanding to know why Chris hasn't killed him yet.<br />
* Chris bitches to Cogs, saying among other things that he can draw romance well, dating education, and how he shouldn't be held accountable for including pornography in a children's comic because he does what he wants to do.<br />
* Chris says he might include more non-Sonichu characters in [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'']].<br />
* In Molvanîa men come to the women's houses first, which Chris deludes himself into believing happens frequently in the USA as well.<br />
* Julie is worried that Clyde might rape her like he did to Panda.<br />
* Julie thinks she sees "someone [[Chris and race#Asians|Asian]] outside her house. She is worried it might be Clyde. Chris says he'd be scared too.<br />
* Julie is sure someone's outside her house. Chris tells her to try not to think about it.<br />
* There's pounding on Julie's door. She investigates; it's a salesman. Chris gives a relieved, crazed laugh.<br />
* Almost immediately, they begin idle banter about cars.<br />
* Chris, possessing all the subtlety of the raging inferno that was the Hindenburg in its final moments, suggests that he and Julie engage in cybersex.<br />
* Chris believes that Panda is gone and that he should immediately move on.<br />
* Chris admits that it's possible he will prematurely ejaculate. The prospect unsettles him some.<br />
* Julie and Chris discuss their first time. Terrible, unmentionable things occur as they go into detail, moving into full on cybersex. Chris concedes it's probable that he'll prematurely ejaculate on his first time.<br />
* Chris lies about his penis size. See accompanying image.<br />
* Chris explains that his semen will taste like strawberries, since he's been eating lots of them in preparation.<br />
* Chris drops his phone number. Yet again.<br />
* Julie AFKs out. At least one troll quietly slips into giggles.<br />
* Julie returns. They discuss Chris's parents.<br />
* Julie tries to white-knight Chris. [[White Knight|It ends with the usual amount of fail]].<br />
* Julie has a plan to get Chris to [[Redmond]]. Chris wants to go, but desperately doesn't want to expend any money, effort, time or thought into the process or even leave his house.<br />
* Clyde returns. He reveals he was lurking under the name of his [[Vivian Gee|cousin]]. He has heard everything.<br />
* Clyde threatens Julie. Chris threatens Clyde.<br />
* Chris stands up Clyde for a bit. Clyde lays the smackdown, saying Chris's logic makes no sense. It doesn't.<br />
* Clyde threatens Julie with [[Wikipedia:Russian roulette|Russian roulette]]. Chris shows that he doesn't know anything about how the game works.<br />
* Chris and Clyde argue about who is crazier. [''Spoiler: Chris.'']<br />
* Clyde reveals his backstory.<br />
* Chris won't leave his shitty landfill for any reason.<br />
* Chris tries to invoke Trolls Remorse in Clyde, which doesn't work.<br />
* Chris displays immense hypocrisy throughout the whole third quarter of the chat.<br />
* Chris watches [[Wikipedia:Sex in the City|''Sex in the City'']].<br />
* Clyde tells Chris he doesn't have autism, bringing up the Wikipedia article to prove it. Chris is stunned into silence, finally admitting that high functioning autism isn't a real thing.<br />
* Chris gives a list of his cooking and cleaning qualifications, going into specific detail about how to empty bins, load a washing machine, clean cat poo and clean up an overflowing commode.<br />
* Clyde laughs.<br />
* Clyde argues against the brick wall that is Chris's mind.<br />
* Clyde has a job.<br />
* Chris believes that he is [[Chris and his ego|simultaneously overqualified for almost any position imaginable]] and a [''jack of all trades, master of none''], to such an ludicrous extreme that he is unsuitable [[Wendy's|even for minimum wage work.]]<br />
* Clyde frigging flips out, blowing his stack.<br />
* Chris babbles about how [[Rocky]] is helping him but is unable to list any specifics, mentioning a Dr. Price.<br />
* Chris STILL doesn't know why [[Megan]] got upset, even though Clyde literally screams the answer at him.<br />
* Chris ripped up the original [[SheCameForCWC.jpg|pic She Came For CWC]], saying he keeps the remains in a crumple-lope (''presumably a crumpled-envelope'').<br />
* Chris blames his homophobia on the [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|Principle of Nathanael Greene Elementary]].<br />
* Chris says he never said he hated homosexuals, an outright lie. Clyde goes spastic.<br />
* Clyde finally gets to the point: Chris must make [[Chris Comes Out of the Closet|a video]] where he admits to being gay. In exchange, Clyde won't dismember Julie. Chris initially declines.<br />
* Under pressure from Julie, Chris takes a very long time to FINALLY decide that he will make the video, even after Clyde reminds him he can just make [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|a second video after to say that the first was blackmail and that he's straight.]]<br />
* Clyde notes that he is about to get banned, so leaves.<br />
* Some guy comes along and Chris discusses what happened.<br />
* Chris gets Julie to agree to taping their first time and uploading it to YouTube.<br />
* Chris goes off to make [[For Julie's Eyes Only|the video]]. The trolls burst out laughing; JulieSpike sings Still Alive from Portal.<br />
<br />
== Transcript ==<br />
<br />
==== 00:00:00 Introduction, Audio Fail ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> There we are. [''Random background noise''] Hmm now... What now? Oh.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hi Chris!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hello.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Ho- [''audio cuts out'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, say that again? You kinda broke up there.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hold on, let me adjust my mic- [''cuts out again'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh! It's you!<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> [''muted''] Yes of course! <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> [''Pause''] So how are you Chri- [''More audio failure'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm okay Julie, how are you?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'm wonderful, thank you. Everything at home o-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Everything's Okay- Everything's Okay at home. Uh, I mean It's only I think that was you asked-yeah. I know you just bought that mic but it seems to be failing at points. Oh well.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Uh, let me configure it really- [''cut''] Maybe I can increase the vol- [''cut''].<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> If anything you might have to close it and relog back then to up after you get it configure correctly. I mean order-or-or to get to configure it correctly.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Well actually I did that, I logged back in after I configured it- [''cut'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Well you should carry speaker a little longer there (?)<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> So- [''cut'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''Aggravated''] ''Sigh.'' Broke up again. [''Pause''] I mean you can tell when you're breaking up because you look at the you-your lips up next to your name on the thing here and you kinda get greyed out, and that means you're- that's kinda like when you get cut off. [''Pause''] Or when you're done speaking.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> hey I, oh I think I know what you- Is it better now-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You got cut off again.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> That's weir-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. I don't know either. You just got it- you just installed it so uh, hmm. This is like first install jitters, or something. I dunno.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Is it better now? <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I heard your, eh, eh, Yeah. I mean, I was able to hear you clearly until the points where you got cut of so uh, uh, yeah. I mean, yeah, you know, try saying something longer and I'll let you know if you get cut off mid-sentence.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I hope this microphone does not cut out as that would be horrible.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, I got- I had your full sentence there. I heard ya. I heard ya.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Alright, that is good-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh. You got cut off again.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> That's weird, I don't know what could be causing it. I turned off everything else that was using the connection.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Well we just, well- it's best to try to make the best- make the best of it. So you know, uh, I'll try to understand you up- I mean- until the points, I mean the points- I mean, as best as I can even if you get- even if you might get cut off sometime. But anyway it's-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'm sorr- I'm sorry about that.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's okay. Hmm. So uh, how are you?<br />
<br />
==== 00:04:14 Money, Jobs ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'm wonderful! Things in [[America]] are wonderf-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yep, I hear that. I'm just sorry about uh, the rising cost of things due to the economic crisis and all.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes, it's very hard on me.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Alright so, uh tell me- so you said you were uh working at fast food or something to uh, earn money?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes, I'm working at restaurants. I'm a professional cook. Sorry. My English is still bad.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You said you were a professional cook?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I am professional at cooking.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, that's good. Maybe after you come over here I could try a little bit of your cuisine for uh... lunch or dinner.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes, I would enjoy that.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I mean, mostly I just uh warm up a TV dinner, but you know I am able to uh, cooking things- uh, cooking things for my- cooking things for myself when I have the instructions in front of me and the ingredients. But it's kind of, like hmm, you know, [[Tour of Chris's House|a bit crowded in my kitchen in here]].<br />
<br />
==== 00:05:30 Food ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> What's your favorite thing to eat?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. I like, mostly like [[Obesity|mac and cheese]].<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'm very good at cooking.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'll take your word for it. And I'll look forward to uh, trying your-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> [''Interrupting''] I'll be right back, sorry.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br />
[''brief pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'm back.<br />
<br />
==== 00:05:59 Lost Passwords ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay. Let's- anyway you didn't answer my question how'd uh, did your passwo- how'd you get your password back after the previous time your brother changed it on ya?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Actually um, he actually just put it back to the original last. I'm not sure if he's gonna give it back this time, however.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Um. Hmm. Has he told you uh, me- he's probably just doing it just to annoy you but uh, maybe he- maybe uh, maybe he like, I don't know his mindset but maybe he wants something?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Perhaps.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I mean like did you ask him like, did you ever ask him like why did you change my password other than just to annoy me? What is it that you want?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I actually don't know why he chang- [''cut off again'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's like if you- [''Julie interrupts, brief pause''] It's like you got to try get into his head a little bit.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Like, you know, one thing you could do, you could, check out his room, see if you can find anything he's written down or look at, you know, look a clues in his room that describes him. Maybe you could, find something- find something there that uh, you can put in- put in common terms with or whatever, and uh, give him something that uh, makes him feel good from somewhere among those clues.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> [''Enthusiastic''] Yes I could do that! That's a very good idea!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I mean, [[Chris's Room|my room]] is a slew of big clues. [''Chris pronounces "slew" as "slow"'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br />
[''Windows beeping'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah so uh... what else do you want to talk about?<br />
<br />
==== 00:08:07 About Our Relationship... ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Umm, I'm not really sure. Maybe we could talk about- I'm not sure. Maybe our relationship?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''Sudden intake of breath, as though wincing in pain''] Oooh. Yeah.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Should I- Should I not bring this up?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, it's okay, it's okay. [''Pause''] Mmm. Ummm. Yeah. I mean I'm just trying to think about what- what's a good- what's a, something to say at the moment. I mean you don't know what to say, you could say [[Mary Poppins|Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious]].<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Ah. Have you heard from my friend Cameron Van- you know Cameron yet? Have you heard from him yet?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Ahh, Cameron?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes. [''Realizing error''] Oh. Her. Sorry.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Uh, possibly is that uh, Is that- I dunno is that like your aunt, still over in [[Molvanîa]].<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Well, I have unfortunate news about Molvanîa. It- it appears to have been destroyed. I know that sounds strange, but, I don't know what happened. I'm very worried.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Maybe I can find something on the-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I miss my hometown.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear ya. Hang on, I'll uh, I'll Google Molvanîa, see if I can-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> [''Backpedaling''] no, that's alright, I'm pretty sure I know what happened.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Uh, tell me in your own words what you think happened.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I don't know, It's just, I think the dictator of Molvanîa, I think he was assassinated, <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> The dictator was assassinated.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'm not sure. As far as I heard from Cameron before he- I lost all contact with him. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''Incredulous''] You mean her, don't you?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Sorry, I keep getting confused, my English is awful. I'm sorry. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's okay, you're trying. You're doing- you're doing okay.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Thank you very much.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I think I'd like to talk about something else. I, you know.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's fine, talk about anything.<br />
<br />
==== 00:10:40 How's Virginia? ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> So, how's [[Virginia]]?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's okay. Uhh, you know, it's a good place to live. As, especially going out to [[Charlottesville]] and uh, whatnot, but it's okay.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Oh, that sounds wonder-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I mean, I can't, I mean I don't know what much to say, but uh, you know [[Bob|my Father]] could tell you, oh yeah, Virginia's a historic town, cuz, you know we got all the history from like, Thomas Jefferson and, oh yeah, [[A Hike|the Monticello]].<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> What do you like to do in Virginia?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. What Do I like to do in Virginia? Hmm. I dunno [''nervous laugh''] Been living in Virginia pretty much all my life so, pretty much just living my normal life at this point. Other than- other than that I can't really say, you know?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Can you tell what that includes? I really want to know what your life is like, I would love to know.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Ahh, let me think about that. My life is like, uh...<br />
<br />
==== 00:12:02 A Wild Clyde Cash Appears! ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Oh no!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I see [[Clyde Cash|Clyde's]] here. Uh oh. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Oh well, let's just ignore him. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. It's like uh, he seems to be under the "Inactive" area.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yeah no one can hear us here.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, and uh, here's a note, it says that Clyde left the channel.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Oh, that's good.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> In the left column here. Hmm. Don't really, I mean, don't really have much on my mind uhh, right now, let me see. Ah, mostly I've just been uh, collecting my thoughts and taking my time. You know, recovering from the Internet, from the [[stress]] of the, the stress of the Internet and whatnot. <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes, the Internet can be a very stressful place, especially with all these [[jerks]] trying to make you mad.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yeah it can be very tiring is- yep. Very tiring.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> You should stand up to them sometime. You should just tell them you're not going to take it anymore. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah I think I, I pretty much do that, just like you know, like, I keep my cool- I kept my- pretty much kept my cool and not so much- [''Chris's cell phone alarm goes off''] Excuse me.<br />
<br />
==== 00:03:40 Alarms Are Distracting... ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That was my phone, reminding me of, er, just a reminder.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Oh, okay. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, lost- lost my train of thought there. <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Awww.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Don't you just hate that where you lose your train of thought and it's hard to recover?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yeah. I hate it so much. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I- yep I- I hear you there.<br />
<br />
==== 00:14:12 Bob and Snorlax ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> So, so how is your life? I mean, are things with your parents okay? I would love to hear.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm, you know, uh, can't complain. It's uh, not to- not totally bad. It's okay. I mean, uh, it's-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Is your father giving you trouble again?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Uh not so much lately. Uh, I had to go downtown with him to get his pacemaker checked.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Oh, I hope he's okay.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> D'awright.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> How's [[Snorlax|your mother]]?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> She's alright.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I heard her singing, what was it, [[Mumble 2|yesterday]]? She's a very good singer. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. You know I told her that, uh, you know. Y'all- Y'all on the Mumble here heard her singing and they gave you a compliment it's like you know, "Oh, I can't sing, I'm tone deaf. They're just lying to try to make you feel good." Just a little um, just a little mod- just a little modesty there. From her point.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Everything I said about her awesome singing. I- I- It was a hundred percent true Chris, I assure you. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I know. I mean, I think she- I think she's a great singer too. <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> As do I.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sorry, could you repeat that, what was that?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> As do I, I agree with you.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, as do you. That's what you said. Hm. It sounded like you said somethings, it sounded like you said "something, something why". Heh. <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, like, I dunno, heh. Could be asking a question like, "Why, blahdah blahda". But never mind about that. I mean, I mean- I mean I understand, I'm understanding you clearly. Up to like, you know, up to when you get cut off and whatever.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> So apparently Clyde did get kicked from the Mumble server, so that's good.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hopefully he's gone for good. He's been trying to promote his awful comic. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yeah I'm definitely gonna take- I'm definitely gonna- I've been taking some time, and I've been thinking about like you know doing a page at a time, and uploading that to my website. As, as I- as I draw the comic.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hey Chris, umm... I know maybe it's confidential, but could you tell me about- a bit about the next comic? I really want to hear.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Tough love, simply enough- in the first episode [[Wild]] and [[Simonla]] will meet in the [[Dating Education]] class, and it'll just be like, a simple romance, without them- with only the professor knowing it, the two get paired up uh, communicating with each other over- over, like Internet and cell phone and whatnot in practice. And then they all love each other.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Cool. I look forward to reading about it.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah I mean, but, you would think, you know, Simonla is a ground/bug type and uh, Wild's a grass-electric. It's like they wouldn't, uh, hook up very well on the opposite traits. But you know, Wild don't- wild don't care. Loves her.<br />
<br />
==== 00:17:37 Music, Alizée ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Wow. That sounds so nice. You know what, I'd like to change the subject a bit?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, sure.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Can I ask you about your taste in music? I'm an [[wikipedia:Alizée|Alizée]] fan myself!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhh.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Can I show you one of her videos? Her videos? <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhh, no. Uh, no that's okay, but you said Alizée, I think I've heard that name mentioned before.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes, I believe it was mentioned uh, last time.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I kinda like mo- like uh, all types of [[Chris and music|music]]. Uh, some heavy metal, not so ehhh, but you know I'll play it on ''[[Guitar Hero]]'', at least.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I've been trying to get ''Guitar Hero''. That's one of the next games I've been planning to get.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Guitar Hero Metallica? <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Well, even ''[[Wikipedia:Guitar Hero: Metallica|Guitar Hero: Metallica]]'', or maybe ''[[Wikipedia:Guitar Hero World Tour|World Tour]]''.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF"><b>Chris:</b></font> <i>World Tour</i>'s already out. With the band kit.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I can possibly get that.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Or you can- or you can get [[Wikipedia:Guitar Hero III: Legends of Rock|''Guitar Hero III: Legends of Rock'']] or [[Wikipedia:Guitar Hero: Aerosmith|''Aerosmith'']]. <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I hear there are some rock stars that are actually playable in ''Guitar Hero III'', who are they?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Ahh, I can't really, I don't really memorize- I don't really memorize the uh, playable characters, but in ''World Tour'' I did create a playable version of myself.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Cool.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yeah there's a video on the [[YouTube]] that shows me playing with my character and the [[Gitar of Fail|Sonichu Guitar]].<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yeah, I noticed you played really well. Do you know how to play the real guitar?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Ehhh. No, but you know, the guitar, the plastic guitar's good enough for me, I mean, I feel it's good- good enough. Like playing a real guitar. [''Voice becomes very gloomy''] Even though it's not, but still, [''back to cheerful''] It's good enough for me!<br />
<br />
==== 00:19:33 Troll Wars VI: Return of the Clyde ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Oh no. I think Clyde's back. Hopefully he doesn't notice this. Hopefully [''drowned out by clattering noises''] -but let's just ignore him again.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I mean, yeah. He's not in- he's not in our private channel. So, he's not hearing us.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yea- [''cut off again'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Yeah but anyway- yeah, I like all kinds of music. Uh, but uh, you know, my favorite female pop star- my favorite female pop star-singer I'd say would be, would have to be [[Britney Spears]].<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I agree, Britney Spears is very nice.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br />
==== 00:20:13 Attracted to Cartoons ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> You know, about your comic? I actually have a question I've been pondering for quite awhile.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Ask.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Umm, do you find yourself attracted to your female characters you created at all?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Ah, do I find myself attracted to my female characters?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> That you have created, yes. I'm sorry if it's a bit too much but I feel like I just, I've been pondering it.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Let me think about that, hmm. Are we including the [[Rosechu (species)|Rosechus]]?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Huh. What?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, hang on a second, we've got an interloper here.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> It must be a troll.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, there he goes, he got kicked out.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Oh, there he goes. Thank goodness.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yep. Ah, right so, are we talking about uh- so, in addition, yeah uh, the [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|human]] [[Allison Amber|female]] characters. Are we also talking about me being attractive to the Rosechus?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes, I've been pondering. I'm just wondering.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah they'd- yeah I would say they all have a good ap- I would- they all think I'm handsome. Like [[barb|my mother]]. My mother- my mother thinks I'm- my mother tells me constantly that I'm handsome and I agree with her, like when I look at myself in the mirror. But it's like, you know, every time she tells me I'm handsome I'm like, “If I'm so handsome why don't I have a girlfriend?” <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I don't know! I can't imagine why either. You're- well to use the best word you're just dashing. You're just wonderful.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I appreciate that.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> It is my pleasure.<br />
<br />
==== 00:22:07 [[Chris and money|Money]] ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''Brief pause, stress sigh''] Let me go off-topic a bit. So, how- how long do you think it will be until you feel like you'll be able to afford to make the trip to uh, come to Virginia?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'm not sure. Things are tough with the economic problems in [[America]] currently. Hopefully you'll be able to um, hopefully I'll be able to soon.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. You getting any financial help from your family? I mean uh, you can count [[Max|your brother]], but I'm not necessarily counting him. <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Well, most of my family live in Molvanîa. For after- I mean, before it happened. I hope they're okay.<br />
<br />
==== 00:22:48 Clyde Speaks! ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm here Chris...<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Clyde?! What are you doing here?<br />
<br />
[''Chris gives a stress sigh'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> I just wanted to stop by and say hi, Julie.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Get out.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yep.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look Chris, Chris. I just wanna tell you something.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah wh-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm off my medication right now, I'm off my leia (presumably leash) and I'm still angry at you now. Last time was a mistake. I shouldn't, [[Vivian]] told me... [''exhales''] Oh god. Tell me Chris. I just want you to answer one thing. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What is it.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Why haven't you killed me yet? Why haven't you killed me yet.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> [''Pause''] Chris I think he's trying to tick me.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Clyde, how did you get in here?!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> [''Short whisper, indistinct'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> You must be on your drugs again, you jerk!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Not this time. Not this time. I was being too nice last time, obviously. That was me on drugs. I was too nice when I was on drugs.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You know Clyde, I have an answer- I do have an answer for you. I haven't killed you yet because you're doing a good job doing it to yourself.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Uhhh... I haven't attempted to kill myself. Ever.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Druggie.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris, I don't think he's gonna leave. I'm scared. What if he tells all the other jerks what you've been saying? What if he knows?! No. I don't know. [''Clyde momentarily interrupts'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He knows nothing. He's been mostly out of this conversation.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> I know everything. Ever. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Op. There we go, he got kicked out. [''pause''] There you go he got kicked out. Yeah but I think most- I think- I think we're safe because he did not hear most of our conversation since, you know, he was mostly in the inactive column.<br />
<br />
==== 00:25:22 Clyde Leaves ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I have to be right back soon.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> So there should be something we can do about Clyde.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But uh, like uh- I'm not too worried about him. I mean I'll deal with him- [''Julie interrupts''] I mean I'll deal with him when uh, he pops in.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhh according to [[Cogsdev]], he says that uhh Clyde shouldn't be able to come back. [''pause, stress sigh''] Hmm, right so we were-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> It must be another troll.<br />
<br />
==== 00:26:09 Chris talks to Cogsdev ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Nah, that's okay. They're taken care of... They're being taken care of- they're taken care of. But anyway getting back to our conversation, talk about uh, yeah you tried- I was asking you if you had any [[Monthly Tugboat|financial aid]] from your family. But uh, then you said that they- the troubles in Molvanîa and such. Uh. Yeah, but mostly uh- any help at all from your family? Financially. [''pause''] Julie? Okay. <br />
<br />
[''Pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Uhh, Cogsdev, you can- you heard the whole conversation, didn't you? [''Pause''] Oh. Okay. [''unclear mumbling, pause''] Oh, okay, well that's okay, you didn't have to uh, come into the channel, but uh, yeah okay but anyway so what's your question? <br />
<br />
[''Pause''] <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Active manner. Hmm. Yeah cuz I like- cuz I like to uh, hmm. But I mostly am attracted to women so when I draw my female characters I like to uh... with like you know I, yeah. I like to make them attractive. I have done, uh, hmmm. [''pause''] I can't really uh, hmmm. No, I would not have uh, sex with any of them but it's like you know, uh... It's like but you know, I love them as if they were my friends or uh, or like you know, my brain children. But I would never have [[sex]] with them. I mean it's like uh, alright, yeah, Cogsdev, I know you're a girl and I will take your word for it on that, but uh, yeah but, yeah. It's like uh, you have- you would have- if you had a son, wouldn't you want to make him look attractive? <br />
<br />
[''Pause']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, there you go, you'd dress him up as nice- as nicely as possible. [''Pause, then inaudible mumbling''] Obviously I watched uh, yeah, I did watch [[Pornography]] and then I did get the frustration from the e- from between the [[ED]] page it- the page and the [[trolls]]. But it's also like, you know uh, I've all- I've wanted to do something like that, you know uh, just to stretch uh an adult muscle in my head. And plus, if you'll look at the, uh, at the lovey-dovey non-[[Nudes|nudity]] scenes like uh, you know just the embracing and the kissing. They're like my best works of- they're like my best examples of [[art]]. It's like even though I'm a frustrated [[virgin]], I can draw romance very well.<br />
<br />
[''Pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. I just- but- you know, a bunch of times I most but- like majority of- like most other people I'm [[random]]. And I'll uh, I'll never know what I'm gonna- sometimes I never know what I'm gonna do next. If I'm- um- what I mean I work out- I don't think- sometimes I don't think I feel. If I wanna do something to- just for the heck of it then I'll do it. But yeah, the [[comic]] is mostly intended for children.<br />
<br />
[''Pause, [[sigh]]'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But it's also like you know, it's- I'll figure that it's also like it's intention for like when they get older. Years later they're- they're in their teenage years and they're like uh, they're looking back at the earlier stuff and it's like "Oh that was so childish." But then it's like you know I- I added this uh- this- the uh, the T-rated or the- or adult materials I pretty much did. It's like uh, they could relate better- they could like relate to that in their adult- in their teenage and adult years. Just uh- just uh- just a small branch out, if you will.<br />
<br />
[''Pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> More of a- I would say that uh, related to like what I would like in my romantic love life. Or like, you know, when I have my romantic relationship with my sweetheart. That's pretty much- I'm gonna be doing it. And also with that uh, also good advice for uh, those that don't know for themselves. Like I'm working on the [[dating education]] episode I was just telling Julie about a little bit. But yeah, that nine-year-old who wrote [[How to Talk to Girls|that book]] pretty much took the words out of my mouth, and then some, but mostly-<br />
<br />
==== 00:33:46 Julie Returns ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'm back, Mr. Chandler!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''Laughs''] Oh that's- that was fun. I was just talking to Cogsdev uh, pretty much.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Ah, I see!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> you know it's just-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> So, did I miss anything important?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Ahh, not really. Just answered the- I just answered a couple of her questions.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Oh, alright. Wait, how did- huh. Oh, never mind. [''pause''] So I'm sorry I had to take a brief absence. [[Max|My brother]] called me for help with something. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I see. Hmmm. I'm sure Cogsdev won't mind but I'm just gonna see if I can... how to do it here it says “kick and mute” I just want- I just want to move- oh, she moved herself. Okay. So, alright so, what did he want? You to help him with?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> He just- he just wanted to help- me to help him with um, from the kitchen. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. I see. That's good. Hmm. <br />
<br />
==== 00:35:10 Non-Sonichu Characters ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hmm. I just thought of another question while I was helping him in the kitchen.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I noticed that all your characters are indeed- well, most of them are indeed Sonichus and Rosechus.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Do you plan to make any other characters that are not Sonichus and Rosechus? Like that character I gave to you earlier?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Possibly. But you know that there are some, there are other animal characters outside that, the Sonichus and Rosechus, you know, there's [[Flame the Sunbird]].<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes there is him. I-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Of course we have the human characters.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes I know, but aside from them, do you plan on making any other non-Sonichu or Rosechu characters?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, possibly for like you know uh, one way or another hero villains, side characters, It just-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I look forward to it!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Time will tell. And uh... here's a thought, after uh, you move to uh, Virginia, and you come be- and you come be with me, then uh, it's like you could help me work on that. Create those characters.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I am pretty good at character design. I've made a few characters like the one you've seen before.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I wanna ask.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm?<br />
<br />
==== 00:36:48 Monthly Tugboats ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> You said before that you do get money every month, is this not right?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh yeah, I do get, yeah I do get a mo- [[Monthly tugboat|social security]]. <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Well, you must have more money than I. Can you try to come to Ohio sometime? Or would you prefer if I came to your house.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'd rather uh, you came to my house. Cuz I just don't feel comfortable traveling long distances, uh by myself at least. <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I guess, but I've never been in America myself either. I'm somewhat worried myself.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Best thing you can do to relive that tension is just to, take a deep breath, once in awhile, take your time. You know, quote unquote stop and smell the roses.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Alright I guess.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You know it's like, uh, you don't have to uh, be in a hurry to get from point A to point B. It's just like, you can space it out in- you can space it out in your own mind, at your own individual pace. As long as you go.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yeah, I think I'll try uh, slowly move over. Hopefully I'll get there this year. If I'm lucky.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Yeah this year. Or uh, I dunno. I'll tell ya what uh, it may be possible, but I might uh, be able to board you here if uh, board you here in my- board you here in my room until uh you get uh, until you get an apartment for yourself, you know? [''Windows beeping''] Until you get here.<br />
<br />
==== 00:38:42 Things Are Different in Molvanîa ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Can I ask you something though?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> In Molvanîa... men indeed do come to the womens houses first. But how things are different here? I figured that they have the same rules.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well you know, same more or less. But it's like uh, most people are more comf- most men are more comfortable with uh, what they call a “[[Wikipedia:Sadie Hawkins Day|Sadie Hawkins]]” situation because uh- alright yeah, Sadie- it's uh, pretty much just fictional character Sadie Hawkins, you can look her up on uh [[Wikipedia]] or something.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I think I will.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah but, mostly it's like uh, no guy would- every- every guy was like afraid to uh, talk to her so, she pretty much did the asking of the guy- asking to the guys. And uh, they would most likely say yes but- yeah so, she pretty much started a trend of women asking the guys or going to them.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I see.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> And I just, for a long while I felt more comfortable- more comfortable in a Sadie Hawkins situation.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Uh huhh.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Like you know uhhh, pretty much the women- pretty much the women coming to me that's uh, pretty much why during my in-person experiences, during my sweetheart search in the earlier years when I actually were, in- actually was in the lo- in the real life locations. I was waiting for the women to come to me. Cuz I was just shy and uncomfortable- I just was shy mostly.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> But you don't need to be shy around me, you know me, you trust me completely, right?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. But still-<br />
<br />
==== 00:40:48 Don't Be Afraid ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> You shouldn't be scared.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but also there's the uh, there's like role troubles and my fam- and my mom would- and my mom would worry and all that sort of- all that sort of-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> [''interrupting''] my brother worries about my safety. You know, he doesn't want me to get hurt out there because the world is a mean place.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear- I hear you there. <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hmm. I'm still worried.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sometimes you just gotta take a plunge. I mean, listen to me, talking like this. It's like I should be taking plunges for myself. Hmm. Here's some thing-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> [''interrupting''] Well, I guess I could try.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I would appreciate that. I really would.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I- I will- I promise you right now, I just want you to know, that I will consciously try to get to Virginia in this year. I will try my very hardest.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you. I want you to know I mean that from my heart. Thank you, Julie.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> You are very welcome Chris. But again, I'm worried. What if Clyde- what if he attempts to rape me as he did with [[PandaHalo|Panda]]? I'm worried. Worried for my own safety.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah but uh, as long as you don't uh, put it on the Internet where you're currently living, then uh-<br />
<br />
==== 00:42:36 Clyde the Stalker ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes but he's able to follow me. I think I've seen a car around my house- someone... someone Asian in it? I think Clyde is Asian, I'm worried. He looked in with an evil glare, I'm worried. I think it was half-Asian actually, I'm not really- I'm just really scared that if I try and leave my house that he's gonna do awful things to me. [[sex tape|Awful horrible things]] to me! I'm scared Chris.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear you. I feel for you. I'd be scared too.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> But I don't think! I- I don't think he'd rape you. Which is why I think maybe you should come- I apologize for the background noise, TV is on.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's okay. Uhhh, but you- surely that guy cannot be out there all the time. <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes but I see his car even at night. I have a feeling he may be stalking me but I don't know where he is and I'm scared to call anyone about it.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well do you have his license plate number? <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> But Chris I- no I don't. But, I know Chris, that- you're tough Chris. I actually- I believe in you. You are the strongest person I've ever met. You're tough! I know you are. I know you've described yourself a couple times but, you are the strongest person I know. I know this! I want you to protect me Chris. Can I please trust you? With my life? Do you think that would be...<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright you can trust- I'm- you can trust me to protect you.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Thank you Chris I apprecia [''audio cut off'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes. I will protect you.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yeah the TV is extremely loud. I should ask my brother to turn it down.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Actually I'm not hearing your tel- I'm not hearing your television. <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> So you know, it's okay at this point.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Alright. [''brief pause''] Chris?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Thank you. I'm happy that I could trust you. And I'm happy that you can also trust me.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm happy too. That uh, you're able to uh, to trust me very much as well and that you understand me very well. Makes me feel better. Makes me feel happier. <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'm very, it's my pleasure making you feel happy, Chris. It's my ple- [''Audio cuts out'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhh, Cogsdev uh, Okay, uh, did you have another question or something?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'll be right- [''Audio cuts out'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''to Cogsdev''] oh yeah well we were just talking uh, but yeah, Julie will be right back so uh, it's okay. Did you have something else on your mind?<br />
<br />
[''Pause'']<br />
<br />
==== 00:47:00 He's Outside! Oh no! ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> So anyway, uh, yes I do see someone outside my house. I don't know who it is.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Just uh, just try not to think about it.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I won't.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah I mean uh, it's not like you saw- I mean, it doesn't- it not- it's not hold it- it does not look like he's looking a [[Megatron pistol|gun]], is he?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'm not sure, he's holding something. I'm worried.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well just- just best not to- to try not to think about it.<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Someone's pounding on my door.<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Someone's pounding on your door...<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'm gonna to go lock it. I'm worried, Chris. I'm gonna go lock it.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay. Yeah.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Oh- it was... I looked outside, Chris.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh huh?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> It turns out it was a salesman.<br />
<br />
[''Chris gives a maniacal, crazy laugh'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Ahh, that's a relief.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'm sorry, I- I acted so silly!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but it's okay- it's only- it's only human. You're only human.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'm sorry.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's okay, we're all human. I mean, I was scared for you too. [pause] I was pretty much quaking over here!<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I was so scared! I'm so silly.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's a'right. I'm here for you.<br />
<br />
[pause]<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I appreciate that, Chris.<br />
<br />
[pause]<br />
<br />
==== 00:48:42 Now That Julie's Not About To Get Stabbed, Let's Babble About Cars ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> So. I think I would like to change the topic if that's a'right?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sure. Whatcha wanna talk ab-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> How do you like [[wikipedia:Burnout (video game)|''Burnout'']], Chris?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's- it's alrigh...t. Yeah... get to cruise around...<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Maybe we should race sometime.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. I did notice in a- uhh- in a- in a trailer that, uh... apparently uh, the concept Camaro that [[wikipedia:Bumblebee_(other_incarnations)#2007_Transformers_film|Bumblebee]] was, uh... is in the game too.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yeah I heard they're actually releasing uhh... I forget the exact name, but they're actually gonna... release [[wikipedia:DeLorean DMC-12|the same car]] from [[wikipedia:Back to the Future|''Back to the Future'']].<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh. That's interesting. By the way you know, I also do have the music video, uh- that was on the [[PlayStation Network]] for a limited time- uh, [[Wikipedia:Fast Car|"Fast Car"]]...<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Mmm.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. It's basic- I forgot who was the guy who... sang it, but I do uhh have the MP3 of it as well. But, anyway, in the beginning it's like- this person who has a PSP... he's getting a message from- from the guy doing the song... from his PlayStation 3... or his PSP or something like that. And then he gets into Burnout, then gets his license... does- a his video with, uh... car action and such. [''Chris's voice fades out''] I forgot how it... goes. <nowiki>[</nowiki>[[stress sigh]]<nowiki>]</nowiki> Mmm. I could send the video over the PlayStation Network I would, but apparently they only will allow you to send photos or... something like that- I don't know how to send videos.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I do have it on my PlayStation 3.<br />
<br />
[pause]<br />
<br />
==== 00:50:29 Oh Chris, You're The Master Of Subtlety ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> When- When I do go to Ruckersville, Virginia with you... I would love to play ''Guitar Hero'' with you... and ''Burnout'', and all the games. I would love to just play for hours with you.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I would love that too. [[Hanky-panky|Play with you.]]<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You know, in [[wikipedia:Guitar Hero Encore: Rocks the 80s|''Guitar Hero: Encore... Rock the 80's'']]... the, uh encore number was uh... [[wikipedia:Play With Me|"Play With Me"]].<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Oh, cool! That's... quite the coincidence.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> So... [''Chris does a bizarre voice here''] come play. Come plaaaay!<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Haha- I will!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Come play. ... and maybe... you know, there may be... [[hanky panky|other things]].<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Heh!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Other... fun things. [''Chris has a lecherous tone to his voice'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I hear you!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Just- just each other on the couch... or on my bed.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I can't wait.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ...Yeah. [''stress sigh''] This point yeah. Pretty much, uhh... but don't quote me- um, I don't want you [[CWCki|spreading it around]] and uh... well yeah, at this point, uh... eh... [[PandaHalo|Sarah... Panda]] is gone. I'll just let her fly away right now... to uh... to Clyde, if she is going there, just let her fly- just let her- I'll just let her go. I'll give you my-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'm real- I'm very sorry to hear Panda has left you. And after all this time and you loved her. And she would just leave you for that.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's okay. [[Chris and death|I'm able to recover.]] Then... move on.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I hope so.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But anyway. Uhh, Julie- I'll let you take my virginity.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> [''muted''] Thank you.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> After you get here and we spend... [[third date|plenty of time]] together and get to know each other in person.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I look forward to that, 100% Chris.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You've come so far. You'll be the uh- the wife- the one who actually made it.<br />
<br />
==== 00:52:51 Chris The Cherry Popp'n, Prematurely Ejaculating Machine! ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris, can I ask you something?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Oh yeah. How do you think our first time would- [''audio cut'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'd do the best I can. [''gives a nervous, scared laugh''] Hopefully not prematurely ev-ejaculate.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hope not! I wanna enjoy it as much as I can.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhh, certainly I would try my best to make it as... satisfactory as possible. I mean, I've watched a lot of pornography, educational... or, uh just... sets or uh, and I've learned from that.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I see. What position would you like best? Can I ask?<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't know. Cowgirl.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I've heard of it. I think I might enjoy it.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You're on top.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> [giggle] Wait, how would I be on top?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm on my back-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Oh yeah, I remember.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. [''pause''] Mmm. So yeah, Julie, you know, come here as soon as possible... If you can make it by- if you can make it for even at least a visit... on my, by my, on my birthday... later this month... I would appreciate that.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris, I promise you, I will try my absolute hardest to visit you on your birthday.<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
[[Image:1240785819569.jpg|thumb|right|Chris is smiling for you. Just for you.]]<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Too bad you can't see me smile, because [[creepy stare|I'm smiling for you]].<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Well, there's always... S-Skype, but... nah. Not right now.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's okay. [''pause''] There's also PlayStation Network Chat. I have PlayStation Eye. But uhh-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -unfortunately, your brother... maybe he'll- maybe he'll give it back to you.<br />
<br />
==== 00:54:54 The First Time OH GOD. ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I hope so. Hey Chris, I know you might not want to, I'm just asking, but do you think you could describe the first time? <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmmmmm...<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> For me?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm... I tell you what, how about I uh... type it up and send it to you on multiple messages on PSN...<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Aww, are you sure?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Cuz... cuz I can't recollect it off the top of my head, and it's a lot of detail.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> But you can stay... I'll stay for the whole thing! It's a lot easier to say it in words. Please Chris?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> For me?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I might. It's gonna take me... a while to recollect.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'll wait the entire time.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You are a trooper.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> And it doesn't have to be perfectly accurate.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Lemme just ask you though, out of curiosity... are you a virgin?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Indeed I am. And I'll gladly let you take it.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let's take each other.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Uh huh.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. [pause] Take it as a compliment, you're making me hard.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Okay, so can you describe it? For me?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah okay I'm trying- lemme- okay, mmm.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I will patiently wait.<br />
<br />
==== 00:56:38 I HAVE TO TRANSCRIBE THIS?! WHAT THE HELL MAN! WHAT THE HELL! ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> We will firstly make out.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Mmm.<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. During that day I would have eaten plenty of strawberries.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I love strawberries. Lemme tell you Chris...<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'm [[mass debating|masturbating]] right now to this thought. So please continue.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> We're making out. Mmm. We're... I'd let you... I'd let ya... pull my pants down, and let you warm me up a bit.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I would love to.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhgh... You wouldn't mind giving- uh, you wouldn't mind giving me a, uh... blowjob?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I wouldn't mind. I wouldn't mind at all.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> So uh, you just imagine it... and you're enjoying it I think?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Of course I am.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. You have my right hand on... your left shoulder.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Mmm.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> J-just just- just having it there.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes!<br />
<br />
==== 00:58:20 Chris Admits To Probable Premature Ejaculation ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. A'right yeah, then eventually yeah... You would pretty much, eventually uh, you might- you might get some of the premature stuff... at least that's like, out of the way. [''inhales nervously'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> We would continue after that, right?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I still have a lot more... I still got a lot more tiger in my tank. Rawr.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Me too.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Mmm.<br />
<br />
==== 00:58:54 Return to Ear Rape ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let's say we, uh... undress each other.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes. [''Julie sounds bored'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'll unhook your bra.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Mmm.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Then I would, uh... be... be marveling at your... at your... nipples.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Mmm hmm.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Cuz you've already marveled at my [[duck|dick]]...!<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> [''pause''] Excuse me?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You're pretty- I mean-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Can you repeat that?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I said, you would have already marveled at my... dick.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes I have.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Then we just- then we'd just be undressing each other... at this point. Then I'd know that it's your turn. I'll massage your breasts with my hands and I'll have my mouth at your pussy.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Mmm... I would enjoy that very much.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes. There you go, massaging and giving me... my head.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm.<br />
<br />
==== 01:00:09 Julie Encourages Chris ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris, can I ask you something?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeeees?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> As I am... are you too... masturbating to this?<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't have my hand... on me.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I was wishing maybe we could... do it together.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm... let's call this a little rehearsal. We don't necessarily need to let anything go with the moment.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Oh a'right. Please continue though.<br />
<br />
==== 01:00:44 Sexy Time Again! ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You know what? I just grabbed it.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'm happy to hear.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, it's, it's not hanging out- but I'm grabbing it. You made me grab it.<br />
<br />
[''Julie giggles twice'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Then eventually, uh... I'll give it to you first doggy style.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Thank you. [''pause''] Please continue.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. In and out, in and out... mmm.<br />
[[Image:Thenightmarecontinues.jpg|thumb|right|SEVEN INCHES MY MORBIDLY OBESE ARSE.]]<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hey Chris, can I ask you something? How big is it?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It can go up to seven inches.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Oh wow! I'd love that. [''pause''] Please continue, I'd love to hear it. I love to hear this- thank you!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> So... just let it play in your imagination. In and out, in and out- doggy style!<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yay!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Then eventually... I'd fall towards you and we'd both lay together on the bed, side by side... I mean we are lying- we are laying on our sides. I am behind you.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Ohh.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''Chris puts on another retarded voice''] My dick is still in your pus-sey, and my fingers are making sure it stays in there.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hmm... Would you do it [[homo|up the butt]]?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [[Homos#Evidence_that_Chris_is_a_homo|Not on the first time]].<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Ahh, a'right.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> We'll enjoy the moment.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hmm. I am.<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''retard-o voice returns''] In and ooooout, in and oooooout. It... feels good.<br />
<br />
[retarded, incomprehensible stammering]<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''more retarded voice''] And pretty soon, and pretty soon the cowgirl... You're on top! You're on top of meeee... you're riding-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I would ride that so much.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -me, you're riding me hard. <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Mmm hmm.<br />
[[Image:Strawberries.png|thumb|right|This is what Chris actually believes.]]<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> B-but then, but then... [''Chris suddenly switches to his normal voice''] By the way I would be wearing a condom. So like you know, so like you know I have no problem wearing it, so if I got inside you and be protected... or I could like pull it out, and go right all onto... your bosom. Or into your mouth. Whatever you want. I'll give you a pearl necklace, or I'll... feed it to ya. <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Ahh.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What do you want. What is it you desire.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Maybe just... to have it. Maybe just to eat it, I suppose. You did say it would taste like strawberries.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's because I would have eaten a bunch of strawberries beforehand.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> So... mmm. There you go. [''retarded voice returns''] Huh huh... in the mouth![''normal''] You're enjoying that.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. And then we would pretty much... [[recycling|clean each other up in the bathroom]]. <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Mmm hmm!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> After that. Or we'd just hang around in the bed. W- W-<br />
<br />
[''Chris and Julie talk over each other for a second or so'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Excuse me for a second, Chris.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> [''Bored monotone''] I think... I'm coming.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Ho- ho boy!<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Thank you so much Chris! That was a wonderful story. I hope that some day it will be a reality.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> We'll soon see, won't we?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I hope so.<br />
<br />
==== 01:04:58 Getting in Contact IRL ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Is it possible you could take a picture of yourself... and send it to me in a PlayStation Network... message?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I will try and get a camera, yes!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I like that. Oh, by the way, uhh... you do have my phone number right?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Uhhm- not yet, but I haven't been able to get hold of a phone, only at my current workplace. I was a- I was pretty desperate to find a place to live so I wasn't able to actually get a phone yet. But I would love to have it, so I can call it once I get to that point where... I can get one.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A'right well uh, you have uh... a pencil and paper?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Uh huh, I do.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A'right well you can call me on my cell, it's uh... 760-0848, area code 434.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> One more time please?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I should uhh start from the beginning, it's uh, (434) 760-0848.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I- [''audio cut'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Got that?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Uh huh, indeed I did.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A'right, read that back to me.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> A'right. [''pause''] (434) 760-088- sorry. (434), 76...0-084...8.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah that's right.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Good.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> After you get your phone, let me know your number... uh uh- message on the PlayStation Network at work-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> A'right-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -or whenever we talk in private, and then I'll know it's your phone number.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Mmm hmm! I'll try get a phone soon.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay. Good. Mmm. And uh- you know what? You made me feel good, even though I [''Windows beeping in the background''] didn't [[Chris Loses It|lose it]] right away, you made me feel good.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hmm! I'm happy.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm happy I made you feel wonderful... as well.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hmm, you did.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I think it'll be better... when we're actually better in person.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> It will.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You know what? I'm imagining myself leaning towards you, and my forehead's touching your forehead... <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ... and we're looking at each other eye to eye...<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Mmm. [''pause''] And then what happens?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''snorts, pause''] I dunno, we just... be emotional and then... and then we make out some more. [''laughs'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I look forward to it.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, let's be emotional in person, together, when it gets to that point.<br />
<br />
==== 01:08:06 Julie AFKs Out, Some Trolls Laugh ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes. [''pause''] I'll be right back, Chris.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay, me too.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> A'right.<br />
<br />
[''Sound of random junk being moved'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Umuhh- I'll be back in about five minutes.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Basement Rosechu:'''</font> In addition, this partnership is a better [''inaudible''] ability, will allow you to [''inaudible''] for any reason. We are a rapidly changing market, and under- [''Presumably, Chris tracks down the escaped rodent and murders her'']<br />
<br />
[''Ominous silence'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Troll:'''</font> [''faint''] Oh... god...! ...Huhuh... [''This is presumably the unknown dude who appears later in the chat'']<br />
<br />
[''Sound of typing'']<br />
<br />
[''Silence'']<br />
<br />
[''Giggling and slapping of thighs in the background'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Troll:'''</font> [''faint''] What the... fuck.<br />
<br />
==== 01:09:42 Julie Returns, Chris's Parents ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Ahh- hang on a second, I gotta put my earphones back on. [''pause''] Okay, so you were say-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> If I may ask?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Um-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, you-y-y-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> -would your parents mind?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> My parents mind what?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> If I came over to your house and we did the business? [''pause''] Would they mind? Would they be okay with it? I hope so.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhh, I think they're- I think they're- they're cool.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I would love to meet your father and mother.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. And I- and I would- Imma let them know about you as well. They're looking forward to meeting you as well. You know, in introduction.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Mmm? Can you say that again?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I didn't hear you.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. I said um- I'll tell- I'd talk to my mother, and let her know about uh you, and after you come over I'll be only too glad to uh, introduce you to [[Cole|the whole family]].<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'm happy to see that- to hear that.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> So Chris, mostly I've been talking about- mostly I've like been starting to talk... is there anything I can talk about? Anything I can answer for you?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''stress sigh''] Uhh, nothing comes to my mind right now, it's- it's pretty much... blank, you know? Hmm.<br />
<br />
==== 01:11:34 The Future ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hmm, a'right. [''pause''] Hey Chris, how do you think your future will be like?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> H-How do I think my future will be like?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes! Either yours or mine and yours.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well uh you know, you know, for me at least you know, eventually, I would be married and... have my daughter named [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Crystal]].<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hopefully you can be married to me, and I can be the mother. [''pause''] Chris, I would gladly be the mother to Crystal. Gladly.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A'right. Good. Unngh.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Would I be a housewife, Chris?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm- we'll see, but uh, I was kinda hoping to be the house husband.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> But I'm very good with [[sonee|children]]... and I can cook.. I can clean very well, too.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhh, we'll see what- we'll see what happens when the time- when the time is right, you know?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> A'right. Do you think in the event that we- in the event that we do decide that I am the house... wife... maybe you could get a job? What job would you like to have? That's a good question, I would like to ask you.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhm, I'm not certain... but at least you know, you're promising, 'cuz, you know, you're thinking that doctor's a good job...<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Wait Chris, what about your CADD degrees? You could get a job with that, can't you?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhh... probably, but uh, not really sure at the moment.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Cuz Chris, the thing is, I really don't have an American high school diploma, I can't work.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'm gonna *try* to get doctor, but it's not gonna be easy, you know?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I hear ya'. Hmm. Oh, I will definitely give the question some thought. Plenty of thought.<br />
<br />
==== 01:13:58 Julie Tries To White-Knight Chris ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Also, I'm really happy- I was looking at- I was looking at the Internet, I was happy to find out that there are a lot of things I can get online that I wasn't able to find in the Molvanîan stores. I was able to... I'd like to set up something called a PayPal, have you heard of it?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hmm. It's pretty good! Maybe-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -Yeah.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I think I'll get one.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhh... I usually use Paypal for like, uh... paying or... receiving money for goods I sell on eBay.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I didn't realize you sold things on eBay.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I did.<br />
<br />
[''Julie and Chris talk over each other'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah uh, just various things I didn't need anymore. But it's like you know, it costs money to list- it costs money to list on eBay, and you would have to have a bank account linked to the PayPal account...<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Ahh.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But it's like you know- knows, it- so then it knows, so they know where to send the money to or take the money from.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris, I thought of something that might be able to get you money.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hey- what if you advertised Sonichu? And, it would gain popularity, and you could sell merchandise... you wouldn't need [[Miyamoto saga|Nintendo]], you could just sell it!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm... I don't know about that, uhhm- <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I think it's a good idea, you really should advertise. Like, in your neighborhood. Maybe in [[Ruckersville]].<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Umm... I'll give that some thought. I'll give that some thought. [''pause''] I'm not making any promises, I'm not making any promises, but I will gi- I will definitely... greatly consider it.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Could I consider something, Chris?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes. <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Maybe- you could go outside, do a meet-and-greet. Just walk around Ruckersville and meet a lot of people. Say- just be nice to them and tell them about Sonichu, the popularity will indeed grow.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''pause''] That's something-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> They'll tell their friends.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's something that... in addition... I can think about.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I really hope you do, cuz', I really wanna see Sonichu become a main brand- maybe even a video game to come out, something I can play on my PS3. It would be wonderful.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. But you know what's uhh- more wonderful? Or what will be more wonderful?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> What? What?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You being here.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I would hope that too. Sadly, the economy is not letting that happen easily. I've said before, I'm tr-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> -trying very, very hard to get over there.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> And your efforts will be greatly rewarded when you come.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris, I... since. Hmm. I figure you should try and do something. You need to prove to Nintendo that Sonichu is a great idea. I know that as far as what I've heard, they aren't exactly-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, actually... they agreed- they uh, they did, uh, you've heard- they've acknowledged that it is a great idea, but because I was unable to uh make the trip, because I could not afford it- afford the trip- said trip myself, to uh Redmond from Virginia, I mean, even on an airplane, or even in- or even on a- road trip...<br />
<br />
==== 01:17:49 Julie's Redmond Plan ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Well Chris, I have like- a step by step plan on what you can do. You can save up for a couple of months, step one. Step two, reserve a cheap airline ticket that can get you to Redmond. Second, bring a trusted friend along- maybe you can get a-hold of [[Cole Smithey]], perhaps?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhh, I-I-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Are you still in touch with him?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Oh, sorry.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm...<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Maybe you could bring... Hmm- you could bring your [[Bob|father]]? Maybe he could help. I've heard he's... he's got [''inaudible''] expertise.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''mumbles''] Mmm maybe my [[Snorlax|mother]]... erm. Or you know, here's a thought... I could bring you.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Weeell, I think we could try that, but I-I don't think it'll be in the near future if we try that...<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> But by all means...<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's uh, gonna be a while before we can uh, save up enough money to uh, actually... save up e- save up like... $800 for like a pair of tickets.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I don't think it'll be $800... I think it'll be something... maybe like $500? I'm not sure? But- I'm not positive...<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, time will tell.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Well, a couple of months and... you know. You can get there. They'll reimburse you, so it won't be a big loss- maybe-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> -maybe you can get Sonichu made. You have to assert yourself, as I've said before.<br />
<br />
==== 01:19:22 More On Nintendo ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah... but it's also- but it's also like you know uh, I thought, I thought yeah- pretty much uh, [[Reggie Fils-Aimé]] uh, pretty much gave me a pretty much- a very aggressive talk down to about... the project's cancellation.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hmm. Though Reggie is... the big cheese of Nintendo, you should try-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> -You should try... showing to Reggie that... you are just as capable... as anyone else at Nintendo. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. No I've made-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> -Show 'em you can... show 'em you can, [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jUTl1vEG62Q as Reggie once said at E3 I believe? Show 'em you can kick arse and take names.]<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Yeah. But I gotta be able to afford the trip first. Then I can show it- then I can show it to him. And uh, after you get here, you can help me with that.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I would love to help you with Sonichu. The game. I would love to help you. I honestly would.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> And you know what else- and you know what else you can help me with in addition to that?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> What?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [[sweetheart from the ground up|You can keep me emotionally sound... and secure.]]<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I will, I promise I will.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah uh, you know, I- [[BlueSpike|I like your voice]].<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Ch-Chris. Maybe you should try writing a game design document. Like, all your plans for the game... <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> -every plan for the game?<br />
<br />
[''Chris and Julie talk over each other'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> -planning things out.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have uhh some... story I- I have some ideas for stories and unlock-ables already... typed up.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Well if-if you-if you could type it up or just send it to me, maybe ref-refine it a bit, maybe... send it to me- maybe I can try and...<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -yeah well it's not complete, well I mean I still have other story details to figure out. But-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's still gonna be a while... for probably even that. And those ideas will be- pretty much will be translated into comics beyond [[Sonichu 10|book number ten]].<br />
<br />
==== 01:21:40 About The Next Comic ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hmm. Oh, that's another question- can I ask you something?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> About the next comic... do you think it'll take as long as the last one, or do you think it'll get here sooner?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''stress sigh''] Urgh, we'll see. Depends on how I feel.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I'll do everything in my power to help you.<br />
<br />
[''sound of Windows beeping in the background'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> And I'll... greatly appreciate that.<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. I should go, uhh... collect my thoughts about everything that we talked about, and... just go and give everything we talked about great consideration... and uh, big deal of thought.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> A'right. Hey Chris?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Do you think you can come back here tomorrow for another private chat? I'd enjoy it if you could.<br />
<br />
==== 01:22:48 From Behind The Mirror, Clyde Returns! ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Wow, I've been here the entire time... heh heh heh... under [[Vivian Gee|my cousin's name]], of course. *tsk* And by the way, Julie- how'd you enjoy that Salesman-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Clyde, get out of here, you jerk!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> How did you enjoy that salesman?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> How do you- how did you know?<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Guess who that was... [''whisper''] Guess who that was...!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Get outta here you jerk!<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> It's a troll! ...who was it?<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> It was me! C'mon I was in- arrg, God, you irritate me sometimes! And next time... I'll bring my [[Megatron pistol|gun]].<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> [''whimpering''] Chris, I'm scared!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You leave her alone!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You're all the way over there, what are you gonna do?<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [[Patti|I'll haunt your dreams]].<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> I don't sleep.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'll haunt you in your sleep.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> I don't... sleep.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'll haunt you at your every waking moment... in your- in the deep crevasses of your mind.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's all you're going to do? Do you want me to just kill Julie and say-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> -Chris...!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> -I'll just haunt you in your dreams? [''cackles maniacally'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> [''sounding terrified''] He's gonna kill me Chris, help! Do something, please!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You leave her alone, you bastard.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's not gonna make me do anything. That's not gonna make me do anything.<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Watch out-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Are you going to run, Chris?<br />
<br />
[''Julie begins crying and babbling in terror in the background'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> That'll show me. Run away, run away! That'll do it!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm not running.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> What are you gonna do, Chris. What are you gonna do.<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris? I'm worried...<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''stress sigh''] I will be by your- I will always be by your side, Julie.<br />
<br />
[''Clyde and Julie talk over each other'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You can't even make the trip to *Redmond*... You can't even make that trip!<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> He knows where I live- he has a gun- he's gonna kill me!<br />
<br />
[''They stop'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris, I'm worried for my life, you have to do something...! You said you'd protect me...!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have God by my side.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> [''chuckles''] There is no God, Chris. What are you going to do?<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'll pray for Julie's safety. And I'll pray for you to... leave her alone. Ow. I'll definitely-<br />
<br />
[''Julie whimpers and sobs in the background'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Praying... will do nothing, Chris. You couldn't even protect Sarah-! What makes you think you can protect Julie?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm offering... praying... is my way- is one way of offering... hope.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Hope. Obama- and that will do nothing!-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -and piece of mind-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> -that will do nothing! ...maybe I should- <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -it will-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> -just show up at her doorstep again.<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
==== 01:25:40 Clyde and Chris Argue ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Get outta here ya' bastard.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's all you're gonna say, g-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> -Chris!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> -et outta here, y-you're not going to protect Julie.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm prot-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> -Chris!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well I can see she- worth-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am here. I will protect Julie.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> How?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You leave- you leave- you leave her alone.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Your words do nothing. You haven't taken action in your life, have you?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have taken more action than you have taken... anything.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> That didn't even make sense- when's the last time you been outside your house?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -terday.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Doing what? Doing WHAT? At McDonald's? Buying your- whatever-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> He was getting something for his mother, you JERK- something you probably never... did!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, I was getting my mother a cup of coffee.<br />
<br />
[''Clyde bursts into hysterical, maniacal laughter'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Ooooh my God, and tell me, tell me-<br />
<br />
[''Chris and Clyde talk over each other- Clyde is inaudible'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well laugh now you bastard, but God will strike down, and smite thee.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Smite me.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Okay, okay. Tell me what's the most... action thing you've ever done. I ran away from home, living on the streets and living in below-zero temperatures. What have you done, Chris?<br />
<br />
[''Extremely long pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have stood up... <br />
<br />
[''Chris and Clyde talk over each other again; again, Chris wins and Clyde can't be heard until the end'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -for my friends. And myself.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Like [[Megan]], am I right? Am I right?<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You are only... a single, solitary soul. With only as much power as the next one. You are only- you are only trying to talk down to me... and scare... me... and Julie, because you yourself are-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> -he IS scaring me!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yes, and you totally protected S-Sarah, didn't you?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> [''frightened''] Chris, he knows where I live! He says he's gonna kill me! He has-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Of course I know where you live.<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
==== 01:28:03 Chris Stands Up To Clyde ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> All you're trying to do is just... make yourself- all you're trying to do is- trying to up yourself... make yourself feel superior, when clearly you are not.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Clearly I am. I mean, come on. You can't even... tell me- you said you would like... fight me or something, you said you would inflict pain- c'mon man, you can't even like, I don't know, I don't know, like, any. I'm a little tired right now. Huh. I'm lost for words. There's-There's is no way to describe how pathetic you are. There is no way describe how pathetic you are.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You know what? You calling me pathetic is calling yourself... pathetic. You're about as pathetic as you are describing me as pathetic.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> ...what.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You're the pathetic one. [''pause''] 'cuz you called me the pathetic one.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Wow, you really are autistic, aren't you.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I may be high functioning autistic... but I know... the mindset of the majority of people individually. I have seen [''Windows beeping''] a lot... in my lifetime. I have seen so much. [''pause''] And you are trying to scare me... with your own... infe-with your own... inferiority... and [[slow in the minds|slow wit]].<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> What do you mean, slow wit? You're the one with autism!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You probably suffer from your own mental innis [sic] or physical ailment, don't you.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, not really. I'm damn good looking. I'm pretty sure you'd be dead gay for me.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I bet you're on drugs, aren't you.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris would never [''inaudible, something about being gay''], you jerk!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -okay Julie. I will never be turned.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yeah but Chris he knows where I live, I- mmm... I'm scared.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'll plan a visit tomorrow okay, Julie? I'll plan a visit tomorrow.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Noo...!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You leave her alone!<br />
<br />
==== 01:30:23 Russian Roulette ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> What are you gonna do? What are you going to do?<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm going to play Russian Roulette. <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Ahh...! Chris!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know what that is? I put a bullet... in a gun. For a thrill thing. Let's just see if she has the... luck, of an honest and pure girl.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''stress sigh''] You know what? You've played Russian Roulette with yourself... I bet. And you've always come out at a loss...<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> If I lost I would be dead. Y-You know what Russian Roulette is, right?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''Chris tries to be deep and meaningful''] Ooooh, not loss- as in, loss of life... but loss. As in loss- of emotion, of-<br />
<br />
==== 01:31:18 Clyde Is Crazy ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Okay, you know what- forget the Russian Roulette game, I'm just gonna shoot her, how about that?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> [''fake sounding cries''] Chris! Help! ...Clyde, I'm warning you. My brother has-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> What are you gonna do, Julie? What are you gonna do.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Dude. She has her brother... to defend her.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Uhh- Her- I've seen her brother, he's pathetic, I could easily kick his arse.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I doubt it.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Wait what is?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah well, you clearly underestimate a whole lot of people. So many-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Uhh, no I haven't. I easily got rid of [[Robert Simmons V|Robert Simmons]], and I easily got rid of Sarah. I can do the same... again and again... and again and again and again. [''pause''] And again.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [[death threats|You really are a psychopath.]]<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> [[Wikipedia:The Dark Knight (film)|Why so serious?]]<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You... need to be put in an institution.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Hehe, more like you need to be put in an institution. Hehe. I mean, you're obviously delusional- you really believe... that you- that you can smite me- and that you can stop me, with your words... you really think that.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't just think that... but I am confident.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You say that you know that- that's just confidence. I know that Julie will be DEAD tomorrow.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> And I know... that you... are already dead inside.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yes, I've been dead inside for quite some time, you were right about something. But I'm still living... in this little body of mine... and I will take Julie's... tomorrow.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Noo...!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You will not.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You're right, you're right, I won't. I'll just leave her... I don't know. I don't know what I'll do.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> What are you gonna do!?<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> -she's a nice woman, she deserves to live. You don't, Chris- you don't deserve to live.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A'right if you've got the guts to say that, why don't you come over to my house in Ruckersville Virginia, you bastard?<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Why should I? I'd be making the game too easy. And I... why don't you come to me?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. I could easily come to you. But the question is, are you... are you, so called, brave enough to actually come to the man who you think you could take down easily... but you obviously fear so much.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know the point of me doing this is so that you come to me, you do know that right?[''pause''] What, are you going to hide behind your parents? Your mother and father will protect you- is that what's going to happen?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ...do not interrupt me, because I was at a trail of thought. [''pause''] Without me, your rage goes on without a point.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> W-Well yeah, that's the point. My rage will die when you die. That's... kind of the point.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> And then what would you do?<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> And then I could feel at peace.<br />
<br />
==== 01:35:05 Clyde's Backstory... ====<br />
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<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You would feel at peace, huh. Yet I bet- that actually you could say the same thing about somebody else who probably has abused you in your lifetime.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> No.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You said you ran away from home.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Was it something- was it- did you run away from home because your mother, or your father, or maybe both of them... was- was uhh, abusing you?<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> It was nothing like that, it was for a girl. That was a pretty bad lead in my opinion, but I've gotten over that. I'm here. And I want to do something terrible. I should write down my plan, right now.<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''stress sigh'']<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> So what are you gonna do. Whatcha gonna do. [''long pause''] Nothing apparently.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No...! I am going to do something.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Go to McDonald's?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris, you really need to do something, I'm scared!<br />
<br />
[''long pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm doing something Julie. I'm standing up for you.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes, but he knows where I live!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> I bet you can't even stand up, could you? Ha ha ha...<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You just leave- you leave her alone. You let- you let- you let her live, you leave her... physically unharmed. Cuz, just as easily, I can call the police on you.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> A'right, do it. [''inaudible'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I will tell 'em the whole story. About you, and [[Ryan Cash|Ryan]], and uh- what you did... they can- they can and will find you.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, a'right, look. My actual house is in Australia, a'right? But you're not gonna find anything there- you're just gonna find... woo. A bunch of weed I left back there, okay? I mean, you're gonna hide behind the police... and that's not gonna do anything because, you know, I am in America so- they aren't gonna do anything.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah well, let me ask you something. How could you afford... a trip to... Australia and back with every fare you could go quickly.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's called an inheritance. An inheritance. An inheritance.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You ran away from home, how did you inherit something?<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Of course, I'm not a stupid person. I made up with my parents before they mysteriously died for some reason.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm taking a [[Pocket knife|stab]] at this, but you killed them?<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> No. They uh... carbon monoxide.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''Chris sounds triumphant''] Carbon monoxide.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's some- ruhg. Look, never mind, you're too stupid to figure this out.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I am not stupid. I have- I have perfectly... understanding... what carbon monoxide is.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Then what is it?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's a poisonous gas.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Where do you think that normally comes from? There's so many general- hehehe... accidental carbon monoxide poisonings.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [[autism|I can obviously tell because uh- you definitely killed them with your c- with the carbon monoxide, because you are putting so much emphasis on accidental.]] You can set it- you can set it- you have obviously set up something that would... LEAK. The carbon monoxide... and kill your parents. What did you have against your parents?<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Man you jump to conclusions... like a [[wikipedia:Office Space|jump to conclusions mat]]. You seriously need help, you autistic fuck.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh- *I'M* the one who jumps to conclusions? Well you jump to- you jump to conclusions of me being [[Chris and English|uncapable]] of doing anything.<br />
<br />
==== 01:39:46 Chris Won't Leave His Filthy Shithole ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You are uncapable [sic] of doing anything, I know that. [''pause''] What, am I right? Am I right? Just admit it. [''pause''] Oh God- every single woman, you wanted them to come to your house, you wanted... Sarah to come to your house, you wanted Julie to come to your house, you are so lazy- why don't you leave your house? [[obesity|And drop a few pounds]].<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> God, stop it! That's enough!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's true isn't it, Julie, though? Is it true?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> No it's not, you're lying, stop it!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> He is lazy. He's not going to come to you, you have to come to him- you have to sacrifice everything. He just sits at home and... you know... plays his PS3.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> You're lying!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> -plays his PS3. Isn't that right?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Stop it!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, you are lying.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Stop it!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Listen-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> -I'm right!<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> He IS lying.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, listen. Listen Clyde- if I could, I would come to- come to Julie personally, I would. But I have a lot at stake here. I leave- if I leave my house... a-and I mean, I don't know Julie's address. I don't know where she is right now. A-An if I had... and if I had- if I uh, had the address, I would most definitely go to her because she is- [''incomprehensible stammering, stress sigh''] -she would be there... to accept me. And let me in.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah? <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I know... I know that I said I would like you to come to me, but... I feel it would be better for you if I went to your house. That was my decision. I would... like to go to your place. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you, Julie. I appreciate that but- I'm jus- I'm just letting you know...<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Actually, Chris-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> NO. I will never-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> This is actually a very hard choice-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> No... Julie, I'm not going to let you-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> ...this is actually a choice...<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> -never going to let you leave.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> CLYDE! Fine.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> SHUT THE FUCK UP.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> No. I won't.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris... I need to think about this. I will think about this. Who's going to go where.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You can't think while you're dead, you know that right?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> This is... this is a somewhat hard choice for me to make, Chris. But I assure you- something will be done.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You're going to let them [''inaudible''], let them walk out, sacrifice her safety... just for you? Ooooh- you ARE pathetic man, you know that, right?<br />
<br />
[''sound of random junk bumping around, an occasional stress sigh, long pause'']<br />
<br />
==== 01:42:56 More Insults ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I tell you what. You, Clyde... are so small. <br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> More insults. That's going to stop me. You're gonna hurt my feelings so much I'm just... stay inside my hotel, and-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't have- <br />
<br />
[''Chris, Julie and Clyde talk over each other- only Chris is audible'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't have- I don't have- <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't have to hurt your feel-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> What do you think about what I said? Do you agree with what I said Chris?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Y-yeah. I-I hear you, Julie.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Thank you.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Y-yeah. Anyway. You are small... [''stress sigh''] You think you can talk down... to anybody. You feel superior. When clearly, you are not. So therefore, you are definitely the small one in this room.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Why am I pathetic? That I actually went out the world, saw everything...<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I-It's because-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> -instead of playing my PS3.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Because you stooped so low... to try and hurt other people, to try and make yourself feel better. That... is pathetic. Thinking that... hurting others... will compensate for anything, for the better, when clearly it does not. <br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Troll:'''</font> [''whisper''] AOmm....<br />
<br />
==== 01:44:23 Chris Tries To Monologue Clyde To Death ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> All it does is just... [''whisper''] hurts... [''normal''] the other people, and it hurts yourself further... because... you hurt... others, against God's will, and you can only... try to tone that pain down... with your own self abuse... in your- with your- in your own... weed... and whatnot. That- that's just sad. You have my PITY. [''pause''] You have my pity, Clyde. And I'm sorry that- I'm sorry that Ryan... committed suicide over the one mistake I made in protest of that ED page... but you do not need to harm anybody, you do not need to kill anybody, because all that will do is just hurt yourself further. Because after your- after your supposedly... you supposedly did this revenge act, then what would you do? You don't- you don't know. But you say yourself, that you will be at peace-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Exactly! That- that's my goal, to be at peace!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But does it really... fulfill... your emotional needs-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah. Yeah, it does. It really does.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It does- it will not. [[death threats|Harming others does not accomplish anything.]]<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, you know all about harming others. You harm people every day. Your parents have to support you, every single day, they hurt inside. They hurt so much.<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I know they hurt. And I feel their pain.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You are the CAUSE of their pain. They probably regret birthing you every single day. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> They do not. They appreciate it. They appreciate every moment. They have put so much time and effort in me- transforming me from... a mental nu- a mental case... to a- to a social pers- to a social butterfly... who can do s- who can do so much more than any other low-functioning autistic person can ever do. And for one thing? If they had not raised me the way they did, I would not be on the Internet, talking to... [[trolls|all the people]] I have been talking to. [[Chris and his ego|I am a warrior in my own rights]] and my own personality.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> So that's why your parents got you that [[abusive babysitter|babysitter]]... to GIVE you your autism in the first place, isn't it?<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Clyde, I think that's enough.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, I want him to answer this.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's okay Julie. They did not know better about the babysitter. How could they? <br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Alright.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Nobody but- It's not like uh, they knew the mindset of the babysitter. Nobody knows the mindset of any individual right off the bat. They have to get to- They have to actually take a little time to see inside them for how good or bad a person they are. And that takes a lot of time and energy. And my mother and father, in my lifetime, saw so much good in me, and all- I have been- and all I have shown for them was a lot of- was a lot of equal good. Some mistakes were made, yes. And I will not deny it, but I appreciate my mother and father, every day of my life. Because without them, I would not be a mainstream socially acceptable kind of man that I am today. <br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Let me tell you, let me ask you something from your brother, uhh, [[Cole Smithey]], I believe.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Half.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> He said your parents, Bob and Barbara, met at a bar. And they concepted you out of a drunken stupor.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Your parents birthed you because they were drunk. They didn't know what they were doing.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> They were not-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> gave birth to a failure like you.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Listen, they were not drunk. They were-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Ask them about it. Cole Smithey told you years ago to ask them about it but you never did, did you? Why don't you go ask them?<br />
<br />
==== 01:49:20 Sex in the City, you Faggot ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You listen to me. Drunk or not, they had me. At an old age where my mother was so close to menopause and my father was a senior citizen. It- I was truly a miracle. It's like, I'm just like a man with only one ball and a woman with only one ovary. Which by the way, I picked that up from an episode of [[Homos|Sex in the City]].<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Wuh- that's nice that you watch Sex in the City. You faggot. Anyway, ahhh-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Anyway-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Sex in the City is for girls, you do know that right? <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I feel that- that shows that are supposedly aimed for girls are- are best- are best set for- are best viewable by those of both genders. Because men can attribute very well- very- in a positive way emotionally from such emotionally enriching programs. And also, less wars would be caused if men were more emotionally [''audio break''] -iked as such- more emotionally caring and understanding. Like women are.<br />
<br />
==== 01:50:51 War! ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You do know wars have been caused for political reasons, not because men don't care. It's not about “ease of mental understanding feelings”, it's because of political gain. Power and corruption. What is wrong with you?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''sigh''] Those people who have fought for power are clearly, were clearly not very well off themselves because they had to hide behind power themselves. So many people hid behind- hide behind one thing or another. I don't have to hide behind anything to prove myself. Anything or anyone.<br />
<br />
[''Julie makes moaning noises in the background as Chris talks'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You do know that uh, even Hitler had a girlfriend?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, I have heard that.<br />
<br />
==== 01:51:53 Chris sucks ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> My god Chris. Do you not understand? You are pathetic. Completely pathetic. Apparently- I'm surprised you managed to get three women interested in you. And yet you're not going to do anything. Come on Julie. If you stick with this man you will be making the worst mistake of your life. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Wu- well-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> That's not true!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Name three redeeming qualities that Chris has.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> There are too many to name! There are so many, I would have to make a lot of paragraphs all about them. And every quality he has is why I like him. And love him. So step off.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Okay, Chris, let me tell you something. Where do you think Autism comes from? <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Scientifically speaking it has possibly come from a drug, or otherwise it may possibly be genetic. <br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> [''furious''] Then why do you say a babysitter did it?! That's not drugs or uh, whatever the other thing you said. Genetics!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> The ba- ba- stop. The babysitter locked me in a room by myself. Without anybody else to play with or socially interact with. That's just, that's just a real-life event that brought out the uh, curse that was buried within me. From the genetics, or the uh, medication. <br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Stop lying to me. You don't have autism, you're just using it as an excuse to blame all your problems.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have- I have [[Autism papers|medical papers]] I have, that prove- that prove that I was- that I did have autism. That's-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> [''interrupting''] That was in the [[1980s]]. Get a REAL diagnosis!<br />
<br />
==== 01:53:57 Suddenly Chris loses the plot ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> My first word- I said my first word when I was two weeks old. <br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Impossible. No man can learn a language that fast.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Believe it or not, I was in my mother's arms, and there was a woman witness aside from my mother, and I said “monkey”. <br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> [''laughing''] Are you sure you didn't say “McDonald's”?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I was trying to say mommy, but instead I said monkey. <br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Okay. If you get a real diagnosis, like now, you know what they'll call you? They'll just call you an idiot. Cuz that's what you are. You don't have autism, don't blame it on that. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You're right. I don't have to blame everything on autism. But I am and was- I was at least. And I am a man, and I have recovered beyond- from beyond that. I have come out of my own autistic shell. And have- and have conquered so many boundaries that any low-functioning autistic person would only be too scared to leap over.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> [''Enraged''] They are not scared! What is wrong with you?! They have actual mental issues! You don't!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Right, they were inhibited. But I have conquered my inhibitions. You're right, I should not have to blame my autism. Because clearly I have conq- clearly I have overcome it.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You didn't overcome anything. You were just lazy from the start. You didn't want to make friends, you just said “Oh they're gay, I don't want to be their friend”. You know high-functioning autism is a lie, it's a complete lie.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It may be a lie from your point of view, <br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's not a point of view, it's fact, it's fact.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Maybe from your point of view, but-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> I just said not point of view! It's a fact.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It may be. But it describes an origin.<br />
<br />
==== 01:56:37 The terrible truth of High-Functioning Autism ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look- look it up yourself! Look up high-functioning autism. Who actually agrees with it? No one! Only actual autism or that Asperger's thing, but no such thing as high-functioning autism. No such thing.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''sigh, pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> As I said, get a real diagnosis! Now! And see what they say about you.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I may consider that.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Don't consider it, do it. I want you to know the truth. Maybe then I won't hurt Julie. We'll make a deal. I won't hurt her if you just do my demands. And they're simple demands, not crazy stupid ones.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris, please.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> What's that Julie? You want him to do it?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I just want you to leave me alone Clyde!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> I will! If Chris does what I ask.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright. I will see- I will look into getting a more updated diag- analysis of my autism. <br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, that means that I think you're gonna be lying again. And you know how much I hate lies.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Clyde, I tell you nothing but the truth.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You have been lying this whole time. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, as far as my autism goes, we shall soon see. I will find somebody to test me, and we will soon see what it says on the paper.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Okay. Look it up on Wikipedia. High-functioning autism, right now. I want you to look that up. Alright?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Fair enough.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> See the part were it says “Classification”? It's not a recognized diagnosis.<br />
<br />
[''annoying loud clattering as Chris types'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm typing it.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> -As said in the 1980s as a crazy voodoo economics blah blah blah. Okay? You get a real diagnosis. This to why. This it doesn't exist anymore, today's society.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm, say that again?<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Read the part where it says classification. Read it. Read it to me. If you can read.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It says here it's not a recognized diagnosis in the DSM, oh, Diagnostic Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. <br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Exactly! It's not recognized.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> So do you know what that means Chris?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''brief pause''] Give me a moment and I will answer that question. I wish to read further in this document.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's a simple sentence with simple comprehension! It's not a- it's not a recognized diagnosis. So what does that mean? That they diagnosed you with something that doesn't exist!<br />
<br />
[''All quiet on the Weston front. Finally Chris speaks.'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright. From this, from the one sentence, in this said I was never with a mental block. <br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Exactly. You never had a mental block.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Fine. I agree.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now why do you blame everything on your autism when you don't have it? What was really stopping you Chris?<br />
<br />
[''Very long pause, approximately fifty seconds. Occasional typing in the background.'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Maybe you should... make a video... to your so-called fans. Maybe that'll help you stop me. You think that'll stop me? No, it won't.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. A'right, so what- so to answer your question... the only thing that was stopping- the only thing that was stopping me from... this, was... because I was- I was- I was less able to... interpret non-verbal cues.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> W-W-What are you talking about. Look, I mean, come on man- you're 26 years old, you live with your parents, and now you don't have this mental block- what are you gonna blame it on? You can't get it- you don't have a job, I-I-even if you were given all the money in the world, you wouldn't be able to figure out how to rent an apartment. You wouldn't even know how to cook, you don't know how to clean, you are a pathetic excuse for a man. <br />
<br />
=== 02:03:09 Chris is Educated On Cooking, Living in Filth ===<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sir! I will have you know that in high school I took two home economics classes, so I am very well educated- so I am educated on cooking. And, I have been cleaning... a whole bunch of [[chandler cats|cat poo]]. As well as some cat pee. And recently, when I overflowed a commode I had to clean some of the wat- a little bit of the water that ha- that was on the floor, with 409 and paper towels. Aaand I am capable-<br />
<br />
[''Clyde appears to have some kind of laughter based seizure in the background'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am capable of loading the washing- the uh, washing machine, with clothes of a white- or a [[niggos|colored]]... and put in some laundry d- and put in some laundry detergent from... a single [[fapcup|cup]]... out of a whole box, close the lid, and start the washing machine. And then transfer everything to the drier... and start the drier. And also I am capable of loading the dishwasher... with the dishes... on the bottom and the cups- and the cups and the mugs on the top rack... putting some powdered detergent in there... and starting the dishwasher. I am also capable of uh... using of a- hand washing the uh dishes, the cloth- the wash- the- the dish cloths and such... I am also capable of uh, taking the garbage bags out of the garbage can... and putting an empty garbage bag into the garbage can... and taking the garbage- taking the garbage bag... taking the bags full of garbage up to the top of the hill, to be burned in the barrel. And also, the cans will be- will be- will be in the c- will be in the bags, and they go to the [[recycling]] facility.<br />
<br />
[''Chris seems very impressed with his remarkably mundane list of abilities'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Congratulations! You can do anything that a normal person can do. I con- [''sound of windows beeping in the background''] -[[Count Graduon|gradulate]] you. [''pause''] Lemme tell you something- you need two classes to tell you how to do that? God- you can't support yourself, you can't- you can't support a family. God you make me so angry. <br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Tell me, why do I make you angry?<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Because you are a pathetic excuse for a man. And I'm trying to protect these women, with, you know, whatever I have to do to get them away from you. That is why Sarah is no longer talking to you. I have convinced her that you are a pathetic excuse for a man, you can't do anything.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. <br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> And so far you haven't proven otherwise- you still live with your parents, you still don't have a job, you failed to go to Nintendo- I mean God, that was a golden opportunity and you failed miserably. So what do you have to say to that.<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
==== 02:06:22 Paging Mr Floyd, Your Wall Is Back ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did not have the money to... make the trip, but-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Because you do not have a job. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, because- no, it was because I was compulsive with spending. And I did not... have enough saved at the moment. But I am s- but I am saving-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> How much do you have m- how much money do you have saved at the moment? How much money do you have saved, from what you get from the government. That's it. If you had a job, you would have plenty of money to go. You know that $300 is... barely anything for someone with a job.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> $300 dollars. You're thinking I get $300 a month... <br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You would get well more than that if you HAD A JOB! [''Clyde sounds enraged'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''smug''] I got news for you. I heard I'd get $800 a month.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> [''Clyde begins to crack''] God you- [''Windows beeping''] get- way more than $800 a month IF YOU HAD A JOOOOB.<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
[[Image:wall.jpg|thumb|right|This is what Clyde is arguing against.]]<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> And it increases with every... year... on my birth month.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You do realize that people make thousands more a month, with something called- [''deep intake of breath''] A JOOOOOOB!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am aware of that. But I just do not feel... at the time... that I need to be... in a job, because, I am getting the money from the [[monthly tugboat|social security]]... and my fath- and my father's assured me that it's more than- that it's more than anyone can make... in a jooooob...<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Are you- are you- are you an IDIOT!? You could EASILY make more than $800 a month with a JOOOOOB. Look- I'm pretty sure you could make more on minimum wage!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well that's just, pretty much, shows what you know. Have you ever had a job?<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Of course. I've had [sic] one right now. A driving job. Where I drive people around tonnes of places. Sure, gas is expensive, but I make more than enough. And I love driving, it's my favorite thing- [''Clyde's voice becomes stalkerish''] I love it so much.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I mean- lemme- lemme ask. Limo... or taxi?<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's my own, personal, driving business.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I see. Hmm.<br />
<br />
==== 02:08:44 Chris's Skills ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You can make your own job. If it's a service people want. Which is more than I can say for [''inaudible''], there's tons of people without cars. And I get get them places. So Chris- what are your skills? What can you do?<br />
<br />
[''significant pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Actually I'd say basically I'm... [[obesity|all-round]]. But you see, that's a problem- I have too many... skills that I am good at. You might say-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> [''Clyde seems naturally incredulous and angry''] If you're so good at them, then get a job in ANY ONE of those skills. C'mon! <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You might- you might say I'm a jack of all trades... and master of none. <br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Then get something with minimum wage- c'mon man, that is th- that is the worst excuse I've ever heard. [''Clyde adopts a mocking tone''] I'm too GOOOOD for all these things, I'm not gonna get a job! [''normal voice''] That is the worst excuse I've ever heard.<br />
<br />
[''pause, large amount of background noise and static'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am cap- I am capable... and willing... to get a job... whenever I want to. But I just want to make sure that I have a job where I would feel... most comfortable- most comfortable... with [''Windows beeping''], where I would feel- where I would not feel that I was being... pigeoned-holed for my skills... and that I was making fu- that I was making good use of my uh- skills as well. And-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> No you don't.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> And defin- and also... make enough- make if possible, over a thousand a month.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You could easily make over a thousand a month. I mean, Christ man, you have two degrees in this CAAAAAAAAD thing, right? <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''smug''] I have earned those, yes. It's-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> What have you done with those? What have you DONE.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''smug''] I have designed the [[CWCville Shopping Mall|CWCville shopping center]].<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Show me. Show me this. Show me. I'd love to see it.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It would take a whole bunch of scanning.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You've got time. Send it to me. You know my e-mail- you know, GREGG MAYS- with three g's. And what else have you done with your degree?<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have put more perspective into my artwork. And my creativity.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> What do you get from your artwork? NOTHING. You don't get money from your artwork.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Maybe not, but it was uh- but it is- it is something that is capable of... enjoying. At my own personal pace.<br />
<br />
====02:11:41 Clyde Loses It ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> No- I am also capable of enjoying blowjobs, okay? But doesn't mean- I CAN'T MAKE MONEY OFF THAT. [''pause, quietly''] In fact that costs me.[''normal''] But ANYWAY. [''dramatic''] What... can you do... that makes... MONEY. You are a PARASITE on America's teat [''inaudible'']. You just LEACH off the government, getting money that- those who- money just because you're autistic- WHICH YOU ARE NOT. You're just leaching off the government. [''pause''] People with actual jobs support your lazy arse.<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am capable of... standing up... and supporting myself, wh- when I am... when I am ready to. But I like to feel like I-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> [''exploding''] You're 26 years old, WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'RE NOT READY?! <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I like to feel like I have a woman by- by my side to help me make sound decisions. [''digital sound in the background''] At the right time.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Spoiler alert: you're never going to get a woman. [''pause''] You know what? You wouldn't even like it-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes he will! Me!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Be quiet. I'm talking, Julie. I'm trying to tell you- <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> No!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> -how pathetic he is, you need to see what this man-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> No! No!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> -is the worst mistake of your life!<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> You're a jerk!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> No- no. I'm trying to help him. You know my cousin [[Vivian Gee|Vivian]]? She's been trying to help this fool... and guess what? Nothing has worked. [''Clyde stammers uncontrollably''] -get actual help. What have you done, Chris- WHAT HAVE YOU DONE.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''smug''] I... am seeing my pastoral counselor. [[Rocky Shoemaker]]... on a weekly basis.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> And how has she helped your life?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> She is helping me grab a more s- stable, s-sense in my mind, and capable of uh understanding... [''another, identical digital sound''] p-pieces of my... pieces... around here and there.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> That doesn't make SENSE! See an ACTUAL psychologist.<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Well. She may- she is- she may not have a degree in psychology, but I feel that her work is greatly... greater that w-w-w-wait a minute, lemme rephrase that. [''muttering''] Gimme a moment... [''sharp intake of air, normal voice''] She is... wonderful. And... certainly more than any... $25 an hour-per-visit psychologist can do. And I have seen a $25 dollar an hour psychiatrist... Dr Price. I forgot his first name.<br />
<br />
[''Chris confuses a psychologist, someone who simply counsels their patient, with a psychiatrist; someone who can provide the aforementioned council but may also prescribe powerful anti-psychotic and anti-convulsive medication. Reference: http://depression.about.com/cs/psychotherapy/f/psychologist.htm . It's interesting to wonder which one he actually saw, especially since the name of the doctor on his [[autism papers]] isn't Price, it's probably not the same doctor. As for the first name of the doctor who treated him, all signs point to [http://www.vitals.com/doctors/Dr_Douglas_B_Price.html Douglas].'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> And what did this... Price guy... do?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> When I was... when I was required by [[Piedmont Virginia Community College]]... or more specifically, the real life [[Mary Lee Walsh]]... to uh, see Dr Price... he helped me sort out some [[chris and anger|anger management]] i- sort out some anger management issues I had... at that time. And also allowed me to- and also helped me... in... putting my sweetheart search in perspective. And how to improve on that... and I think uh, that from his help I was able to uh... more comfort- more comfortably at my own pace actually make some good- make a good- good number of gal-pals and then find uh, and then eventually find one that uh, would be my true sweetheart.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> And it'll be me, Clyde. Don't you think otherwise you jerk!<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
==== 02:15:34 Clyde Can't Beat The Wall ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> [''stress sigh''] Uhgh... I've got nothing. I- I can't even begin to describe how pathetic you are.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You see-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> He's rubber you're glue, everything you say bounces offa him and sticks to you.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris used that insult a while ago. That- insults do nothing. I'm citing some real life things I know about Chris, and I'm using it against him, I mean- you say that [[Encyclopedia Dramatica|ED page]] is full of lies but every single thing on it is true. I know the people there. I know who [[Blanca]] is. [''whisper''] I know all these people. [''normal''] Yet you seem... urgh. You think that ED twists your words around- they're YOUR WORDS. People are just interpreting as such. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''smug''] Exactly. MIS-interpreting them.<br />
<br />
==== 02:16:27 Chris Doesn't Know Why Megan Left ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> They are YOUR WORDS. I mean, why do you think [[Megan]] left? Why do you think Megan left.<br />
<br />
[''long pause'']<br />
[[Image:ShecameforCWC (200803).JPG|thumb|right|Some of Chris's tender honesty.]]<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I CAN answer that... and I am just try- and I am trying to think- and I am thinking... of a good way... to phrase it. In my own a- in my own honest and [[Chris and his ego|humble]] opinion. [''long pause''] Simply put I was... very- I was... emotional. And I tried to outreach- I tried to reach out for her in an emotional sense... with... tender- with [[Rape|tender honesty]]... and uh... a gentle... hand on the shoulder... apparently I got to close. And she felt uncomfortable, and she just forced me away.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> [''furious''] [[SheCameForCWC.jpg|YOU DREW A PICTURE OF YOU HAVING SEX WITH HER.]] What is wrong with you!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That was... after the ED page, and I did that in protest against it.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> [''angry''] That doesn't even make sense! You drew that out of your... God, I don't even know- wanna think... sexual deviant. That is why Megan left you, because you are way too fucking creepy for her. She put up with you for [[Megan Saga|two years]] while you touched her and... GOD, I don't wanna think about it. So for two years she put up with you. And what do you do? You draw a picture of you having sex with her.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> For your information, it's hard to tell, because... I had her- I had her eyes... censored. Just like you would see on any television... program. Of-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -that sort.<br />
<br />
[[Image:crumple-lope.jpg|thumb|right|The Crumple-lope, or as the State of Virginia will one day refer to it as, 'Exhibit A'. This is where the remains of Chris's horrible drawing presumably lie.]]<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You... told her. That it was her. She knew that it was you. It's just between you, and Megan- it doesn't have anything to do with anyone else, that ED, no trolls, [''inaudible''] -have lost, whatever. It's between you and Megan. You screwed it up. You're the only one to blame.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes. I made the mistake. [[I Am The TRUE, Original CCWC|I do not deny it]]. And I blame myself for uh, having drawn that picture. In fact... I have actually done it up into bits and pieces, and I have the pieces tucked away in a crumple-lope [''sic. Presumably he means envelope.'']. That one drawing.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know what? That's an improvement. That is something of an improvement. But that still doesn't make up for everything else you've done.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''massive stress sigh''] I will not-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Lemme tell you something. Why do you hate [[homos|gay people?]] You know [''voice goes to a whisper''] [[Vivian Gee|my cousin]] is the biggest... lesbian. [''normal voice''] So why do you hate them?<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That is... I just do. I have had the bad experiences, against... I forget his last name at the moment. But- he was the Principal at- Oh yes. Doctor Johnson of [[Nathanael Greene Elementary School|Nathanael Greene Elementary.]] The principal. He was a h- he was uh, the homo... that pretty much set me against... the homos and further kept me on the [[homo#fear of becoming a homo|straight path]]. And plus, if I was ever a ho- if I was ever- if I ever, if I were ever... had any attractions to the men, then I would be uh- more inclined to associate with them, but I have rarely associated with a man. I've felt more comfortable with the women. And-<br />
<br />
[[File:Asperchu Principal Parody.JPG|thumb|right|After Chris told [[Alec]] about Principal Johnson, it was parodied in [[Asperchu]].]]<br />
<br />
[''Clyde talks over Chris'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, that is a lie. That is a lie.<br />
<br />
==== 02:20:15 Chris Stacks Lies On Lies ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I've felt more attracted... to...<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, did you watch the Super Bowl? <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did not watch the Super Bowl.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> With your male friends- COME ON. Just because they're your friends doesn't mean it has to be GAY.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I guess-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Just because one. Bad. Person. Just ruined it, doesn't mean every single person is bad. Just like Mary Lee Walsh is a terrible woman doesn't mean all women are bad, right?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I guess... [''pause''] Yes. I agree with you with that statement.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> [''annoyed''] So why do you hate them so much?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I never really said... that I hated them. That is another misinterpretation-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> [''explodes''] YES YOU DID, [[CWC Update 30 January 2009|YOU SAID IT IN YOUR VIDEOS]], DON'T LIE TO ME! ...lies.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay well, okay, I was misunderstood. I may have chosen a wrong choice of words.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> [''furious, quoting Chris''] ''I HATE THEM''. HOW... ELSE...! HOW CAN YOU MIS- DAAAAAAGOD! That is just BLATANT HATRED. That is just blatant hatred.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It was obviou-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Then why did you-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It was obviously misplaced rage.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> For a thing that happened to you years ago.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You can't blame- you blame that principle all you want, I agree with you on that. If they feed you something terrible, then that's fine. But way you can hate EVERY. SINGLE. PERSON. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You are right! I do not hate every single... person. I mean, I will respect... and only respect... my fellow maaan. And, pretty much acquaint to [''sic'']... only friends- only friends with a man. I am willing to associate... with my- with my fellow man. [''pause''] But fo- but fortunately God has blessed me with a majority of [[Gal-pals|female friends]], to show me that... to show me how to get to [''sic''] more in touch with my emotions because... if you- if you notice in the definition of autism, defini- er- er-... [''stress sigh''] We have- we autistics have a lack... in the uh non-verbal... non-verbal communications and misinterpreting them... and with that we are unable-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> [''furious again''] I JUST SAID YOU WEREN'T AUTISTIC. You aren't! That is a lie! You're- [''Windows beeping''] blaming autism AGAIN.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am not blaming my autism. I'm just describing... a couple of traits among the autistic people.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Which you aren't. [''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah w-w... autistic people also... have the inability-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> -which I just said you AREN'T. So why are you bringing it up?<br />
<br />
[''The Wall keeps talking, simply ignoring Clyde'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ...the inability to express their emotions... soundly. With- without understanding.<br />
<br />
==== 02:23:23 Clyde Demands A Video ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> A'right. Listen to me- I'll give you a two day reprieve. Just make a video to YouTube. Three minutes, [[Captain's Log, Stardate February 5th, 2009|proclaiming your love for men. how gay you are]], and I'll give you a three day break. You try to save Julie. Well I guess [''inaudible''] or something. If you don't do it within the next-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Wait- wait!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> THREE hours... I will- w-well, we'll see Julie's funeral... in a few weeks, then. A'right? You understand me?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Oh god-!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -you shut up-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> -oh GOD!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Clyde, you shut up. I'm straight. <br />
<br />
[''Clyde, Julie and Chris all talk at once; this is all I can make out'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I will never be-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> -make a video to YouTube, I will destroy your image. <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris, I think he means it!<br />
<br />
[''They stop talking over each other'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> And if you don't do it? I will... I don't wanna kill Julie. Just... maybe just cut off an arm.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You leave her alone.<br />
<br />
[''Julie begins to cry in the background'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris, please, Chris, he knows where I live!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You leave Julie alone. I am straight-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> He's going to do it! He's going to do it!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -and I will never admit the opposite.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> So you're not gonna make that video.<br />
<br />
[''pause'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Make another reasonable request.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> That is a pretty reasonable request. I mean-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You're asking me- you're asking me-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> -you can always [[Chris Destroys His Vibrator|take it back with another video!]]<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well I- you are asking me to [[List of Chris's lies|lie]]. Right off the bat, you are asking me to make a false-<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris! You can just remove it after he sees it, can't you? As long as he sees it, you can remove it!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I don't wanna lose my arm...!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'll take off a leg too, how about that?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Oh God...! Oh God Chris, I'm sorry, I just don't know what to do- I'm scared!<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> So what's it gonna be... your image, or your woman?<br />
<br />
[''long pause, approximately seven seconds'']<br />
<br />
==== 02:25:14 What's It Gonna Be? ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> My... image. I will... sacrifice that.<br />
<br />
[''Chris retardedly misunderstands the question. He was being asked which he would SAVE, not which he would SACRIFICE. Clyde begins to laugh hysterically.'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> So you're gonna- you're going to heeeh... let her lose her aaarm-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''annoyed''] No, I said I would sacrifice-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> -oooh what the fuuuuck!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''screaming''] SHUT UP! [''normal''] I'm sacrificing my image.<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Ahhh. Okay. I thought you were THAT pathetic, for just a second. But you're a little bit above pathetic. Which I haven't come up for a word for that yet. Okay- three hours. Three minutes. If I don't see it then, I'll make some plans. And I feeear-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Charles[''sic?'']- specifically what you want me to say in the video...<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> You're gay. How much you love men. How loooong you've been closeted... you pretend you have all these gal-pals but they're only to disguise your true nature. You've always been born this way. And it's all you have to say. [''pause''] And you better do it.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> And I have three hours to come up with a three minute video-<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yes... that's my request.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -of that sense. Very well. <br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well... I appear that I'm going to be banned from this server soon. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''stress sigh''] Sorry, can you repeat that?<br />
<br />
<font color="#4DBD33">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm going to be banned from this server soon. I fear it. Well- tootles. [''inaudible''] -smoke.<br />
<br />
==== 02:26:32 Clyde Vanishes In A Puff Of Smoke, Some Dude Appears ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [''stress sigh''] Julie I will make the video. I will abide with his request.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Chris... I think you might have saved my life. I am eternally grateful. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am willing to sacrifice [''beep''] anything for my woman. <br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> If there's anything you want me to do... for you.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0B610B">'''Dude:'''</font> Is Clyde in here?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> He's gone.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0B610B">'''Dude:'''</font> Was he in here?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0B610B">'''Dude:'''</font> If he's ever in here again, um- just find me? I-I'm the admin of the server. So I can-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Y-Yeah, it's okay this time. <br />
<br />
<font color="#0B610B">'''Dude:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He just wants me to lie.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0B610B">'''Dude:'''</font> Wait, what?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He wants me to lie in a video.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0B610B">'''Dude:'''</font> Lie about what?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> About my orientation.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0B610B">'''Dude:'''</font> That's terrible. Why would w-w- don't do it, Chris!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have to.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0B610B">'''Dude:'''</font> Why?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> For Julie.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0B610B">'''Dude:'''</font> That's admirable I guess. I know you're a good person, Chris.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'd rather lose my- I'd rather lose my image than a woman who cares about me very much. [''pause''] And uh, Julie?<br />
<br />
==== 02:27:49 Taping His First Time ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [[For Julie's Eyes Only|We can vi- we can videotape... I would like it if we could videotape our first time together.]]<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I would like that too, Chris.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm- I mean like, you know, over a- over my [[PSEye|PlayStation Eye]], and over with uh- with uh- with uh the [[Pickle|worst parts]] cut out, uh- I can upload that and uh... we'll undo that.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0B610B">'''Dude:'''</font> I'll leave you alone.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's okay. [''More Windows beeping, pause''] Undo the lie I would have to tell.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> All right- yes. Where would you upload it, exactly? The video of our first time?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I would add it to where like uh- I would put it in a good sense where it would stay, where would stay on the YouTube.<br />
<br />
[''Transcriber's note: Such a video would almost certainly be immediately removed for Terms of Service violations, not that Chris would ever be concerned about the rules and regulations of the various free services he uses.'']<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> ...okay.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Julie?<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Yes?<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I love you.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> I love you too, Chris.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> And also, inform your [[Max|brother]]. About what I am going to do for you.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br />
<font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A'right. I'll talk to you later.<br />
<br />
<font color="#CC00FF">'''Julie:'''</font> Okay Chris. Thank you.<br />
<br />
[''Presumably, Chris leaves'']<br />
<br />
==== 02:29:01 This Was A Triumph! ====<br />
<br />
<font color="#D44942">'''BlueSpike:'''</font> [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y6ljFaKRTrI This was a triumph! I'm making a note here: HUGE SUCCESS. It's hard to overstate my-]<br />
<br />
[The trolls laugh over the top of each other uncontrollably. BlueSpike continues to sing Still Alive, and soon, all of the trolls all join in.]<br />
<br />
<font color="#0B610B">'''Dude:'''</font> Holy...! Holy shit!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0B610B">'''Troll:'''</font> Holy fuck!<br />
<br />
<font color="#D44942">'''BlueSpike:'''</font> -satisfaction! Aperture Sci-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0B610B">'''Troll:'''</font> -satisfaction!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0B610B">'''Troll:'''</font> He he he!<br />
<br />
<font color="#D44942">'''BlueSpike:'''</font> -we do what we must, because, we can! <br />
<br />
<font color="#0B610B">'''Troll:'''</font> Haaaa haaaaa!<br />
<br />
<font color="#0B610B">'''Troll:'''</font> Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha-<br />
<br />
<font color="#D44942">'''BlueSpike:'''</font> -For the good of alll of us... for the ones who are dead!-<br />
<br />
<font color="#D44942">'''BlueSpike:'''</font> -but there's no crying over every mistake- <br />
<br />
<font color="#0B610B">'''Troll:'''</font> .....................................every mistake-<br />
<br />
<font color="#D44942">'''BlueSpike:'''</font> -you just keep on trying till you run out of-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0B610B">'''Troll:'''</font> -you just keep on trying till you run out of-<br />
<br />
<font color="#0B610B">'''Troll:'''</font> -you just keep- ha ha ha ha ha ha... out of-<br />
<br />
[Tape runs out]<br />
<br />
==Links==<br />
* [https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBNTF2dkh5dUJIbEk Download]<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 2|Mumble Chat 2]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 4|Mumble Chat 4]]|}}</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_2&diff=163027Mumble 22012-09-26T23:53:43Z<p>Irisviel: /* People Love Poketunes */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{Articleofthenow}}<br />
[[Image:0839-MomDesi.JPG|thumb|right|180px|In Mumble 2, a Wild [[Barbara Chandler|Snorlax]] appeared.]]<br />
<br />
'''Mumble 2''' is the second [[Mumble]] chat that took place on 4 [[February 2009]]. More than an hour long.<br />
<br />
This is a more organized Q&A type chat than [[Mumble 1]]. Questions from [[Clyde]] about [[sex]] in the [[comic]] and interesting tidbits about how Chris believes sex is the same as romance. This is pretty hard hitting, with stuff like how Chris is into [[McDonald's|fast food]] yet he's against tobacco. A lot of drama involving Clyde.<br />
<br />
Length: '''1:49:17'''<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
<br />
===Notes===<br />
* Chris doesn't like Clyde because he stole his sweetheart.<br />
* Audio cuts out for a minute before Chris says: "...HYMEN!" (You broke her hymen)<br />
* Trolls claim [[Panda]] is with Clyde, Chris wants to hear her voice, they say she's busy<br />
* 'She and I WERE very close'<br />
* Chris didn't have $400-$800 to go and see Panda; claims he got this number from an airport website recommended by [[Miyamoto]]<br />
* Insists on [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] being in ''[[Animal Crossing]]''<br />
* Doesn't want to talk about his deal with them<br />
* Insists that he doesn't have to turn down his radio since his voice is louder (''it is horribly loud in the mic'')<br />
* Panda gave Clyde all of the sites, etc.<br />
* [[Sarah]] is going to be with Clyde, which Chris wants to deny<br />
* These motherfuckers keep talking over each other<br />
* Calls a troll's critique crap<br />
* [[Bubbles]] must be aroused, she isn't wet all the time<br />
* Bubbles is 90% water so does sperm just swim around forever? NO<br />
* Clyde: This is a children's comic, why so much sex?<br />
: '''Chris:''' It is romance. My best artwork is when they're making out 'romantic moments', drawn in protest to trolls. Shows that [[Rosechu]]s have vaginas, not [[duck]]s.<br />
* Admits to maybe going overboard<br />
* Trolls try to reason with him about the [[ED]] article: There wouldn't be an article if he didn't react like he does.<br />
* Trolls say that TV-Y7 means NO SEX but Chris points to romantic anime that have making out (cartoons are for kids, whatever the content).<br />
* Trolls talk about Japan being less strict about those things<br />
* Everyone gets to vote in [[CWCville]], even if they're [[Niggos|black]].<br />
* Got his idea from [[Mary Poppins]].<br />
* Troll tries to give historical background about cough medicine putting kids to sleep. Chris insists it was the lullaby that put them to sleep.<br />
* Discussion about Chris, 'gay message' sent by a troll<br />
* He calls Clyde a scoundrel<br />
* BELIEVE HIM HE IS STRAIGHT<br />
* Chris tries to speak Mexican at 20:50<br />
* Mexican speaks Mexican to him... he replies in Menglish<br />
* [[4-cent_garbage]] is located in Mexico<br />
* Someone says that he needs to improve his Mexican<br />
* Chris is against smoking, CWCville is smoke and alcohol free<br />
* Rehash of why [[tobacky]] is bad, his position on it, alcohol=bar fights<br />
* Chris's dad smoked and had several bypasses, has a pacemaker and has had heart attacks<br />
* Mention of his hair cuttings for his fans<br />
* Chris was doing math in his head, got in car crash.<br />
* Chris has taken college level math. Took trigonometry.<br />
* Trolls gang up on Clyde for stealing Panda<br />
* Time will tell when Chris will make the money he would have in the Nintendo deal<br />
* Trolls bash Clyde for his pot smoking <br />
* Chris doesn't watch news because it's bad news =(<br />
* Bashing of the Mexican<br />
* Chris can type 30 to 100 WPM, but can't type and talk at the same time<br />
* Chris says [[PSN]] is free though Clyde(?) points to the $1,000 Chris spent on PSN<br />
* Chris has been typing for 15 minutes now and it is VERY loud<br />
* Chris has been busy IRL therefore the comic release doesn't have a date<br />
* Someone points to nudes on [[YouTube]].<br />
* He does not have it on the YouTube, but he isn't going to take it anymore.<br />
* Claims some of the photos are photoshopped.<br />
* Clyde offers help to take ED page down.<br />
* Chris denies taking those pictures, doesn't want to talk about it, making him uncomfortable.<br />
* Some of the pictures are real. When questioned which ones are fake, Chris can't answer.<br />
* Chris hates Harry Potter because it was in competition with [[Pokémon]]!<br />
* Chris is too stressed to read Vivian's [[A Girl Who Brought Down the World|book]], but he likes the cover!<br />
* Polly, who has been talking the whole time is confronted by Chris who thinks she is a guy. Polly is upset. Chris apologizes.<br />
* [[Jimmy Hill]] has launched his Sonichu show<br />
* More Mexican talk at 55:10<br />
* Chris giggles and sighs happily when Cassie, another Mexican, compliments him and when she leaves he says 'Chiquita Bonita'<br />
* Rabbichoso talk (Sonichu.info)<br />
* Classic trolls are leaving Chris alone.<br />
* Chris likes Steel Angel Kurumi (''quote from [[Wikipedia:Steel Angel Kurumi|Wikipedia]]: often classified as ecchi due to the focus on fanservice and panty shots'')<br />
* Chris claims to be very strong, could beat Clyde up. Says he would show Clyde a [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force|Hard Day's Night]], and would give Clyde pain.<br />
* ShinyMarshtomp makes an appearance? Likes Rabbichoso<br />
* Chris likes to eat at [[Country Cookin]] (''like Golden Corral'')<br />
* Chris likes to imagine his first time. <br />
* Clyde says the first time is awful, Chris said it was because Clyde prematurely ejaculated<br />
* Watch porn with naked women to cure your gay<br />
* Guys sitting next to you = gay coming on to you<br />
* Falsion has been in the chat room and is afraid he is gay<br />
* A wild Snorlax appears<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
<br />
===Waiting for Chris===<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I can't wait to hear Chris! I'm a huge fan!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, goddamn these noodles are fantastic. Man, I wish I could eat like this everyday.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Have you eaten the rice balls?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no. These are noodles. These are-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Fan-fucking-tastic.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now they're all gone, it's fantastic, you know?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Sweetangie is Chris. Or, we think so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's definitely not the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm disappointed there's so many impostors out there. Kinda my fault, but, you know, if it weren't- ''[unintelligible]'' -hard to come by.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His mic was working last time he was here, just fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He usually capitalizes his words, like in every sentence.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is- I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Is it set to push to talk or something?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You better get us your email address Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah its push to talk. It's called push to talk. It's fantastic ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, just have him set it to voice activity. It works so much better that way.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Aww, he left.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> You guys are fucking idiots.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other again]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You guys scared him off by being guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, you fucking jackasses. Nice going.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Was that even the real...?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yes, that was the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He's too much of a pussy to talk.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, cause you scared him, or some- No, or he's too stupid to be.<br />
<br>''[Trolls Laugh]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Arrives===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Chris arrives, with radio playing loudly]'' Hello.<br />
<br>''[Trolls all greet him]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, now-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Why haven't you got your microphone working?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't know why my microphone [is] messed up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry, but we had an impostor here before.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm registered. I've got myself registered now. So, uh, hopefully-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> That's probably why. It had to like, uh- calibrate.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Well, I'm calibrated now.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So, Chris, have you seen Rabbichoso, it's fantastic.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't give a crap about your stupid pencil sketch.<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am not listening. I do not have to listen to ''you''.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Why, I'm not understanding [inaudible]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well for one thing,and I'll say it on here, you stole my sweetheart!<br />
<br>''[Cutout continues]''<br />
<br />
===PandaHalo, Trip to Redmond and Animal Crossing===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You broke her hymen!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I know it's a terrible mistake, but I plan to make it up to her. I'm getting married and uh- I'm doing the things I should do.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh and another thing, if she is really over there with you now, then put her on the mic. Please.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> She's not- He never said-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, Chris, she's very busy, OK. She's very busy.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's not over here right now. Okay? So lets drop it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, fine. Well could you tell her to please send me a message lettin' me know, for sure, so I can know- so I can know to-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' I'll let her know whatever you want, but it's her life. She doesn't have to send you a message. You failed her. You failed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' She and I were very close.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If you we're so close, then why didn't you go?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' Because I had- Aw, hang on a second. How do I- oh, that's right. This thing. Right. Mmm. Hold on a sec. Oh yeah, because I did not have four to eight hundred dollars!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It doesn't cost that much to go cross-country man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes it does. I know, I saw it on an airport website. Where I was be- Where I was- recommended to me by Mr. Miyamoto.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, you can drive there. It's not that hard.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened with that? I thought, um, didn't you have a deal with them or something? I heard a rumor that your characters were going to be in Animal Crossing.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, they are in Animal Crossing. And I did- and I do- I did have a deal with them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened though?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' I'd rather not say.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Radio, Clyde and Criticism===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, why don't you turn down the TV? It's hard to hear you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Annoyed sigh]'' I do not have a TV turned on in here.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I can hear it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have a radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I hear something in the background.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Burping throughout sentence]'' Well that's the- that would b- the radio. And it is not that loud.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But it shows up pretty well on your microphone mic. With due respect.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But still, my voice is louder than the radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Ah goo- ahh given.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh, Chris? Uh, when are you going to do the new Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something over Polly]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' Uh, I'll answer Polly's question. I'm not sure. It's, uh, it's in progress right now, I'm drawing it up.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I can't wait to read it!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Well, we'll see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Listen, Clyde kind of has admin on here, so we can't really do anything about him. So, yeah. I don't know.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Hard to hear over Chris's radio]'' ...with you guys. I love you guys. Just as much as Chris loves you guys. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I was angry. I was angry. But I'm calm now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't try to hurt any other person from now on.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm doing the best I can. I'm doing the best I can.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have much- I do not have much to say in response to that right now. Because I'm ticked off.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't let him get to you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're no better than he is, if you give in.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris, I just wanted to let you know I'm a huge fan of the comics, and I'm glad you keep doing what you're doing. You're doing a great job, and just keep it up, alright man?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, yeah, I appreciate the, uh, what's the word I'm looking for? The, the, uh- well, the encouraging words. Encouragement. I appreciate the encouragement. Well, there are things, uh- I- er- current events I do not appreciate. I appreciate the positive encouragement.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I can't really do anything. He took over the IRC channel. I used to be the owner. I mean Clyde. He's like taking over everything.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, it was because Panda gave it to me, you know. But anyway, I mean, you can't just listen to encouragement, you've got to listen to criticism, man. Criticisms are what make you better, you learn from your mistakes. You learn from mistakes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Be right back guys, my wife is calling.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I don't- I don't- Tons of people don't like the Rabbichoso art style, but you know, I gotta improve on that. That's something I plan to improve on. There's a lot of criticism in the death of Sonichu, right? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What? What did you just say?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a lot of criticism of Sonichu. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. For a moment there I thought you said something different.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What, what did you think I said? I'm just saying, there are people who like it and people who don't like it. You gotta start taking in those suggestions. You know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. So many things that will be improved upon. But, I just have to hear from Sarah herself that she really is going to be with you, Clyde. I have to hear it from herself. It's one thing to hear it from you and then it's- then on that note, it's just I find it very hard to believe. So I have to hear it from her.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I kinda think that Rabbichoso sucks. I mean, I think it could be funny, but it honestly looks like it's drawn by a kindergartner.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, Sonichu has evolved over the years. You can see that the art's getting better. Rabbichoso doesn't even look like something a beginner would do, honestly. I mean, ''[Interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A whole bunch of crap!<br />
<br>''[Everyone starts talking at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, Sonichu is in color.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I know, I accept his criticism. But you just called it crap! Now that's just rude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have emotions going behind me- uh, behind that opinion.<br />
<br />
===Cassie===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, did you get my message.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Aren't you going to be the gentleman, then? Aren't you gonna be the gentleman?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I just want to ask you, Chris. I'm Cassie's friend. She- she's worried sick about you. Why haven't you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did email her! As a- I- I haven't gotten any re-plies from her. I have emailed her and I have instant messaged her on A.I.M. and Skype. I haven't heard back from her. I don't know what's going on there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> ...you emailed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> When was the last time you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, hang on, I'll check.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris? I have a question. My fa- One of my favorite new characters is, um, Simonla, and like, I also like Zapina as well. Um, are they gonna have bigger parts in the series later on?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, could you repeat that question?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I was wondering if Simonla and Zapina will either have bigger parts in the series later on. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [[Sonichu_10#The_Final_Countdown|Possibly]]. Possibly, but, uh, I can't say for sure. Oh, and, uh, to answer your question, uh- in answer to, uh, I believe, uh, Screwhead, who asked? It was about four days ago. About four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Yeah. Four days ago? Okay, I'll tell her to check it out.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> The last email I sent was about four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> She'll contact you in a while, though.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I'll tell her to check it out and- and thanks Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright. Mm.<br />
<br />
===Bubbles's Pussy and Sex in the Comics===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris? I have a question.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, my favorite character is Bubbles, I kinda liked the, uh, the thing she had going with Blake, where she was kind of keeping the relationship secret. I thought that was kinda clever. I was wondering, uh, she's a water-type, so does that mean that her vagina is always wet, or does she have to be aroused like a normal woman?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, aroused. That's applied for all the, uh, Rosechus there. And also, like, you know, she's not just a water-type, she's also- she's a water- and electric-type, like uh- oh, shoot- What's the name of that one? Originated from Gold-Silver-Crystal series, uh, evolves from Chinchou? Lanturn. And she has, uh, she has Volt Absorb ability.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, Chris, another question following Bubbles. Uh, her body is 90% water, and now this thing about the whole sexual intercourse- about it. Now, don't take this rude, and you don't need to answer me... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...I totally respect your creative work. My wife actually got me into this, uh, show actually. So, what happens is- like, as you know, like, semens are like little fishes in themselves. Would that mean, I mean, would they actually have a route to fly into the egg, in theory, or do they just swim around her whole body, just forever just swimming around.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. The, uh, the internal or- the internal organs uh, for the Rosechus are pretty much the same thing, so I'd say pre- about, uh, as good chance as most any other mammal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, so you mean she's able to control her density a little bit more. She- I understand now. She's able to control more her density from the 90% water. Okay. That pretty much answers it just perfectly. That's been bothering me at work. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I got another question, Chris, about this whole sexual thing. I mean, this is a children's comic, right? Why is there so much sex in it?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. It's called romance, and my- and my- if you'll notice throughout the comics my best pieces of artwork among which were those where dey were kissing and making out. Romantic moments.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a hidden page-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' And because- and because- and because of the tension from, uh, the trolls and Encyclopedia Dramatica, I just felt like doing that in protest against them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, but childre-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' Yes but how is that really a protest? That, you know, you know, are, are you like referencing to the 60's when women burned their bras? That was in protes- That was feminism. Saying that they weren't slaves to men. Do you even understand the whole thing?<br />
<br>''[Multiple voices are heard at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Now, to tell you the truth, I never really thought about, I never really thought about that when I-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Chris]'' Then how is, stripping was, how was that protest-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Jack]'' It shows that they have vaginas and NOT dicks. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well you know the dick thing was the fact that they were just, you know, mocking you. I think you went overboard with that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well maybe I did. Maybe I did. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, you did, because that seems kind of excessive, kind of-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' I don't think they would have even bothered to write about an article about you if you didn't just keep reacting like that.<br />
<br />
===Chris justifies sex in a kids' comic===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I have another question.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The point some of us are trying to make is, if it's TV-Y7 that means there should really be no sex in it at all.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible over other people]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's pretty much incorrect, I mean, uh, there's so many romantic anime that's TV-Y7, and they shoul- they have making out.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, a lot of things in Japan, Japan has stricter standards-not stricter, I mean looser guidelines than America. It's much different.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear ya.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I was just wondering what Bubbles, um, she has a, that water whirlwind attack, I was just curious if you had any plans to make- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Butting in]'' By the way, that was a Whirl- Whirlpool.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font>Yeah, Whirlpool, sorry, sorry, Whirlpool, but do you have any plans to mix an, uh, Electric-type attack with that, since water conducts electricity, right? It could be a very powerful-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah, she did, she did an electric attack amongst the- the walls of that Whirlpool and she let out. In case you didn't know, there's a- little bits of lightning bolts among which-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, oh, I'm sor- I didn't notice that, I'm sorry, I'll go take another look. Thank you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hey Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> You make some pretty sweet Little Big Planet levels.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you.<br />
<br />
===Chris on Benadryl babysitting===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, there's a message from Cogs on the side, it's about, uh, do women not have the right to vote already in CWCville.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, evry- Everybody, no matter what age, no matter what gender or race, everybody has the right to vote in CWCville. Even if they're black.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Then what's up with the "Votes for Women" thing, I was-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Not just vote women, but- ''[interrupted]'' any other ethnicities, and gays?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't understand-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did that- heard it in Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What? Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, man, Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, yeah, that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's a classic. It's my favorite movie of all time.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that movie was, like, based in the 1900s.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but still I- still I agreed with that message there-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Taken out of context, that makes it seem like CWCville's set in the 1960s.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What message? That children should be given cough medicine so they'll go to sleep?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''What?''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that's what women used to do back in- That's what mothers, friggin' nurses and stuff used to do to kids in the 1900s, is give children, like, you know, cough medicine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Cause- cause the medicine- uh, correction, the medicine did not put them to sleep, there was a lullaby, not the cough medicine. They only had to take the cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ...because it rained, before dere, and it was not, and it was to, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Rain means cough medicine doesn't have anything to do with each other. That's not how friggin' germs are spread, or colds are gotten. Colds are gotten through germs, not the rain.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How is cough medicine any different from today's parents that just let their kids watch TV until they fall asleep? I mean, it's just as bad.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well- Cough medicine has a lot to do with the psychological effects of it. Obviously if you get- if you keep giving fre-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Thanks, Samantha, that was delicious.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's my, uh, Samantha-<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, that's we're all saying, cause I've heard that there's a lot of different chemicals in cough medicine. You could pick up a ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I don't even take cough medicine, because I'm not a pussy.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Anyway, I never put any references, I never did any references or plan any references to cough medicine or anything of that sort.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Well, Chris, Cassie says the last e-mail she got from you was on the 17th. How 'bout your being gay? Is that true?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[sigh]'' That wa- That was somebody had- That was Clyde hacking through my e-mail and spammed that to my contacts.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, I definitely did not do that-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You're a scoundrel-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -a slanderous lie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I did not do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Whoa-whoa-whoa. Wow. Well, thanks for that. She was worried that you were- that you don't like her.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> You're a scoundrel, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't do that. That was someone else.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I was wondering, because I've heard other news too, I was really hoping that you weren't gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Believe me, I'm straight.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I'll take your word for it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you. And, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Cogs- Cogs got a way- she showed us that, okay? I mean, you only ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br />
===Chris's fail-riffic Spanish===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So, Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, Screwhead's from Mexico. I heard you like Spanish, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hola, Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You know Spanish, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí. Conoso Mexico. Tomé dos años ''[unclear]'' mi escuela secundaria. (Yes, I know Mexico. I took two years [in, possibly] my secondary school.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has venido en Mexico? (Have you come to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, lo siento? (Uh, I'm sorry?)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has estado en Mexico? (Have you been to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Estoy Mexico? No. (I am Mexico? No.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[slowly]'' Has estado, um, in Mexico. Has venir? (Have you been to Mexico? Have gone?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Uh, no, I hav- no, no tengo pansars. ''[sic]'' (no, I don't have pansars (?))<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I think, uh, I think I meant to say- I'm pretty sure-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Did you just say you don't wear pants?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, no, I was trying to say, ah, I don't have plans to go in Mexico at the moment.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's what I understood what he was saying there.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, did you know that, that 4-cent garbage website is located in Mexico?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> That's why-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, that's why they can't get it shut down.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]'' borders, plus it's cheaper to run sites over there; they have, like, several servers.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wanted to talk to you, but she couldn't make it here, well, and, she wants to be your Spanish teacher, because she says that you've got room to improve your Spanish.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Oh, that Cassie. Yeah, I'm sorry, I thought you were- I got mixed up. Um... Yeah, um, I'm sorry, I, uh, I haven't talked to that- I haven't talked to Cassie in a while, but I've been mostly talking to, uh, her gal- her, uh, gal-pal and I'm sure- I'm sure she'd tell you a lot about her...<br />
<br />
===In which the trolls discuss bar fights===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey Chris, how- how does Sonichu keep Rosechu from spending more than a hundred dollars at the mall? I've always wondered how he could manage to do that. I've always had problems with that myself.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That wa- That time at the mall, it was, uh, Kel loaned the credit card. And it's like, yeah- she gave- she gave Sonichu the responsibility of that credit card. She did.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I've always given my advice on cannabis, you should do the ''[unintelligible]'', Cogs Chris, but I think she wants your response.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, one of my friends sent me this picture, and I think you might find it kinda disturbing just because they say it's proof that you're gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Aw yeah, I saw that, that's just a crappy Photoshop.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No, that one doesn't- this one doesn't look Photoshopped at all.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'm not gonna look at it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Oh, you're not? Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, uh, you say you're against smoking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. As a matter of fact, CWCville is a smoke-free, non-alcoholic city.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[partially drowned out]'' That's what we call a totalitarian state...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, and, uh, in the pilot episode with Seth MacFarlane, of, you know, Family Guy? He's always smoking. What do you think about that?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Go smoke.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I just- I just take that with a grain of salt, and, uh, you know, that's what-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, if he can smoke, why can't anyone else? I mean, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Because it causes cancer!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> So does a lot of things.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> It could be a prop pipe.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> In any case, I'm not- in any, in any case I've never done it and I never will.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, but eating too much fast food can give you a heart attack. I mean... so many things are deadly for you.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What about fast food, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> My father used to smoke and he went through a whole bunch of heart attacks. He suffered three- <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Well, I think that might have to do more with his weight.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He suffered through three or four triple bypasses.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I think that's... that's more like a weight issue.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He has a pacemaker!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, eh...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey ya guys, leave him alone. Ya know, my granddad, he smoked most of his life. He quit for 25 years and still died of lung cancer. I mean that's just the way it is. And your body never gets rid of it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, what about ''[pause]'' Chris, what about fast food? That's- that's bad for you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey Chris. Chris, could you do me a favor and send an email to Cassie? She's very worried about you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Yeah sure, I'll send her an email later.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, thanks.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, I've got uh, a certain someone you know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No no.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -she has to, uh, she wants to ask you w- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Also, she said something about some hair.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh yeah. Yeah, that's uh... that's another issue right there. Um, hmmm. I'll talk to her about that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, does, uh, drinking cause cancer?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, but it causes liver dysfunction and likely bar fights and automobile accidents.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, bar fights, but— <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Bar fights!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> -but I don't think that bar fights are that big of a problem.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I think bar fights are awesome.<br />
<br>''[People agree bar fights are awesome]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> But bar fights are bad. I got into a bar fight once and one of my hands got cut and two fingers from my left hand. Bar fights suck.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well, I think that might be more because you're Mexican. Are you sure you didn't lose them picking bo- picking grapes and- or something?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> No, Mexican people are more more- more much macho man; we get into bigger fights. We're more awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No- I think it might be because you got your hands stuck in some machinery when you were out picking in the vineyards.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't know about you guys, but I like- I like having bar fights.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Crashes Due To Math===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't have to be drunk to be in a bar fight or in an automobile accident, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but they increase the likeliness of it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You've been in an autobile— automobile accident, I mean, were you drunk?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I was distracted.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Uh, by what? I mean, it's kinda hard to be dist— you gotta be focused on driving man-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I was doing math in my head.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, math in your— <br />
<br>[Trolls talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> My mind got distracted by being its own calculator.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Are you good at math?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, is that for school?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Are you some kind of savant?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's impossible.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Guys, you're getting ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you like a mathematic genius or something?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> You know some artist people have like superpowers in their head. They can do like geniuses and add really well. ''[interrupted briefly by Jack saying something else about savant]'' Chris you are already an artist. Do you have any like, magical powers?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, I heard autistic people are really good at math. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Well not all the stereo- some of that sounds like stereotypes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[talking over Chris]'' ...it has to do with mental ability; I mean, what's the...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean I don't know- I mean I'm not saying that I'm a total genius. I mean I know- I know enough to get by.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What's the highest level of math you've taken Chris?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> College level.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I mean like algebra, or calculus or...?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. I believe I just did trigonometry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Very impressive.<br />
<br>[long pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So I was wondering. When did you get the CAD degree? I figured it's like a fine arts degree or something? I mean wha-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I designed a whole- I designed buildings and machinery and such along there. I designed the whole CWCVille shopping center.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don't you have a job then?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Your fans would love to see that Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' -I mean use that to design like, actual buildings? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I think I just told you I designed the CWCVille sho-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I don't mean in your comic. I'm just saying-<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde Isn't Popular And Chris Should Program===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well it's a good st-<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I heard you got some nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'll be putting an update on da YouTube soon, but not right now. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking maybe you could like, you know, get a degree in game design and make the Sonichu game? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah man, it's not that hard to learn programming. C++ man.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">''Falsion:'''</font> Clyde, he hates you, why are you talking?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm just giving him some advice, I mean C++ is-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you here? We don't like you. You totally ruined Chris's life.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't ruin his life. He ruined his own life.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yes you did. You've ruined his life. You raped his girlfriend. <br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks at once over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If he was the man he said he was, he'd have gone to Nintendo, made all that money. How- how are you going to make money now Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Time will tell.<br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks again]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, time will tell Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font>''[unclear]'' -need a plan, you know? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking uh, if- uh- would you be interested in getting a degree in game design. Making the game or something? Like if you had to? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Maybe but uh- I still have things to sort out in my real life.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah it's kinda unfortunate what happened with the Nintendo thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah- hang on a second, I'll be right back. Mm- ''[clattering]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So be honest guys am I really that much of a bother. I mean...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah you kind of are.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like a total dickfart.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You realize weed causes cancer? <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I didn't know that. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> And it causes the munchies. You're gonna get fat, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's okay, man, because I work out.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Do you play Guitar Hero standing up?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I play Guitar Hero while on the treadmill. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Will the Sonichu game be a- ''[muffled]'' -or a Wii one?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> It be a Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Wii would like to play. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh. I only got a DS. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I heard you are very good at HTML. Why don't you make a HTML Sonichu game? That would be awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't think you can make a game in HTML.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A- anyway I came back...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hey, Chris? How many courses did you have to take to get that degree in CAD? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -pretty sure you can make a game in HTML-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[speaking over]'' I'm took abo- took about two- took about two years to four years. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, if you can write HTML you can write C++, make your own games. Pretty simple man. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well it's something I'll consider. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde why are you talking to him? He hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm trying to give him some suggestions. I'm not insulting him, OK? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> HTML seems kinda outdated, so to speak. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font>I learn- I took two HTML classes so at least I know how to do- at least I know the ins and outs when it comes to like, workin' on it in the raw data- in the notepad.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> So you don't use Dreamweaver?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I also use Net- also use Netscape composer. <br />
<br>''[Someone starts singing 'Dreamweaver']''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I heard they went bankrupt or something.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't- I don- I don't listen to news because I don't care about bad news. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But that's not bad news that's just safety...<br />
<br>''[Talking over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why you gotta bring this bad vibe in here? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> OK OK I'll chill, I'm sorry it's just my wife- ''[can't hear over Chris typing extremely loud]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris you don't hear about these ones in a while. Like yesterday some guy in my town got run over by a train and he- he died. And that's a really bad thing, you know but you have to hear about it. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yeah but that's because you're Mexican. You Mexicans always play around the train tracks, what's with you? <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No come on, don't be racist.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> It's because Mexicans are stupid. I'm surprised I can use a computer. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' CrassCrab why do you have to be so mean?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> 'Cause my mother was raped by a Mexican. And I'm part Me- ''[muffled]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry man.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> That isn't fair to take it out on every other Mexican out there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His rule applied to millions. Just ignore him.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No I'm not my mother was raped by Mexicans.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> CrassCrab I'm tired of listening to you, get out of here. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Not all Mexicans are like that we- we- I am a nice Mexican guy. Not all Mexican guys are- ''[drowned out by typing]'' -Black guys are the people you should fear.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't get me started on them. But that will be another day. Cause I'm sick of hearing bad news.<br />
<br />
===Chris Types Fast (And Hates Hex-Box)===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris what are you uh- typing there?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm typing a email. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> How many words can you type? How fast can you type? Sounding fast there. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhh say about uh- sorta between thirty and a hundred. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's quite a good range man. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like "The Flash", minus the red jump-suit.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh Chris um- I was wondering if- ''[unclear]'' -game with Nintendo, would it be uh a Wii game or a DS game or both. I only own DS and I don't have any money for a Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[overlapping]'' Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wii, DS and Pla- hopefully uh- possibly uh, PlayStation 2 or 3. Never on [[Hex_Box|Hex-Box]]. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> When you gonna do this shit?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Why don't you like the Hex-Box? I mean I have an Xbox, I would love to play online with you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'd like to say this. Before Chris says anything about that I just wanna say that today my wife came home from the mall shopping for her usual clothes, that Gucci purse I had to buy for her. You know what she came home with? I wanted a PS3 but you know what she gave me was a frickin' Xbox 360. The Elite one? ''[someone speaks over]'' I know, I kept telling her like "Honey this isn't what I wanted. I wanted the PlayStation 3 so I can play LittleBigPlanet, Metal Gear Solid and Sonic Unleashed" <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You can put Sonic Unleashed on the Hex Box as well as Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Too whiny to make out]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Nintendo just- rejected your offer? Cause I- I heard a rumor that there was going to be a Sonichu game or something. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris uh. Cassie wants you to send her your Wii number so she can talk to you on the Wii. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright uhhhhh. I'll get- have to get my Wii number now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Send it to her in an email please.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they completely hate Sony. And they hate Microsoft as well. I mean this guy, Reggie? He always talks about kicking their ass and stuff. He's kinda crazy. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I know. Reggie's very mean he never brought out Mother 3 to America. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah I wanted to play that game.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talked over]'' -I'm tellin' you guys. Reggie's just a great ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Like what?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can- I can't say anything OK but... you'll see. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah so I don't think like if you got the deal with Nintendo I don't think they'd put it on like mu- like anything else but the Wii or DS. Yeah, cause that Reggie guy he frickin' hates Sony. And Microsoft. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wasn't he also the head of VH1?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or Pizza Hut.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. What are your favorite places to eat at? <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember um Peter Moore he used to - ''[unclear]'' -but before that he was with Sega when Dreamcast was out. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yup. Let me type this email please. I mean y'all keep talking I'll just listen. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's no reason to hate the Xbox. To be honest.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or um- Chris um- do you wanna release your game on Nintendo and on Sony. If you do talk to somebody like EA or something, you can like do um- multi-console thing like a third party thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[busy typing]'' Hmm. Well it's all to think about. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I mean Sega does third party now so um- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah well I'm gonna keep typing this email here. Y'all keep talking. <br />
<br>''[Sound of Chris typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's true, it's true. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Chris I wanted to tell you that Cassie's going to be here any- any second so you can talk to her. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Hm. ''[continues typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Don't you care about her? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[annoyed]'' I'm typin' da email to her right now! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah um 360 is pretty bad it um- red-rings all the time. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> I've had mine over two years. The same one. And it has not red-ringed yet. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Dude you have to pay $50 just so you can play online. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[echoing]'' Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah it's bullshit.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah it's totally free on PlayStation. And Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris. Chris. No, no, no, no, I gotta talk about this. [long pause] Chris...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupting]'' I get less connection problems myself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can't let you get away with this Chris. You spent over $1000 on the PlayStation Network. OK? And you say you can't afford $50 for the Xbox? Terrible reason. That's a terrible reason. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, um, Cogs I had a friend of mine whose red-ringed a lot of times. She did not like it at all. She got herself a PS3 instead. <br />
<br>''[Chris is STILL typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I heard that like- the PS triple eats up a lot of energy and like- has cau- has like- burned houses down. Cause it messes up the- no but the PS3 really- <br />
<br>''[More of Chris typing then audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So when's the next comic coming out Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I can't say. I don't have a date for it right now. I've been busy with the- with real life and such. You know getting the s- getting the website back up and all that. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh but I've been waiting so long. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I gotta tell you something Chris. ''[unclear]'' -to the trolls but I haven't done anythin' myself. It's run off into splinter groups doin' stuff to you. Ever since the Panda thing, I haven't done anything to you man. Everybody's been running round doing things. I have no control anymore. So I'm back here. This is why I'm back here. Do you understand? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. I hear you.<br />
<br />
===Nudes On YouTube===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I hear you got some uh- nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> What? <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hear you got some nudes on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Dudes?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Nudes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> That's what I thought- I have nothing na- I have nothing like that on the nu- on the YouTube. I've nothing like that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh someone posted the pics from the ED page. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> They're just tryin' ta get on- they're just tryin' ta get on my nerves again. But I'm not gonna let 'em.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Did you take those pictures or what? Where'd they come from?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Uh, are they Photoshopped?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah most of- Yes. Most of them are Photoshopped.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I can help you with ED. Chris I can help you with ED.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You can see the neck and the body doesn't quite match up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, Chris. Cassie's just arrived. She's just a little nervous about talking to you, but she's gonna talk to you soon. Is that OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I just got one quick comment. Look, the ED people were in contact with me, but I've lost contact with them. But I know you can delete that page permanently. I'm tryin' to help you man. You can get that page down forever. Even the entire site. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What, after you raped um- Sarah? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I'm trying to make amends. So let me do my business. All right?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's too late to make amends. Look what you did.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look what Chris has done. Look at what Chris has done, okay? ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um. Cogsdev said she had a look at the data, they have it up in Image editing software.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah. Well...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I don't know what to tell you there. <br />
<br>''[Several trolls speak at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Doesn't that mean they're real? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I don't think so. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You don't think so?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Well, did you take them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Then where did those pictures come from? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who took those?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I don't know. And I'd rather not talk about that anymore. It's making me feel uncomfortable.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Are you lying to your fans Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> We don't feel confort- we don't feel comfortable. We're big fans of your work and we don't like being lied to. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I'd like to make a point. It might just be a doppelganger [sic].<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, you know the thing I hate most is lies. I like to spread the truth about you Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You say you're honest, but you're lying to us.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[clearly annoyed]'' Fine, fine. Some those pictures are real. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Some of them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Some of them but not all of them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Like, which ones aren't real?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'd rather not go into detail because I'd rather not look at 'em. Cause uh- ''[interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' -are you ashamed of it?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Do you not like to look in the mirror?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You owe it- you owe it to your fans.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, but- yeah, but- yeah, but upon looking at those it's like ref- it's like reflecting a pe- uh p- a past moment in my life where I- I was played for the fool. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah, by the man in the pickle suit?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh that guy- I hate that guy.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah I saw- he was trolling some other people you know? So you're not alone, Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he took pictures of me like that too...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That guy's an asshole, I hate him.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhhh yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He took pictures of my wife too. Sick bastard. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> He's a peanut.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br>[another pause]<br />
<br />
===Chris Hates Harry===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I just uh- never was fond of it. Ever since it came out, I was never fond of it. ''[unclear as troll speaks over]'' -just like I hate Harry Potter because he's s- he's goin- he's uh- in compe- was in competition against the world of Pokemon. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Well that- that doesn't make sense. But they're two different medias. Pokemon-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah but- yeah but still he-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> -Harry Potter is a book.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah but he poses as competition against them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> That's not really competition. I mean- <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talks over Jack]'' Oh that reminds me about books- Vivi- Vivian wrote a book and sent it to you. You never read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes. I am afraid I- yeah, yeah- I'm uh- I've been uh- so I've been under uh- too much stress between internet and all that. I'll ge- I'll read it, I'll read it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's been waiting for your response for quite a long time.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I like the cover. (pause) Nice cover.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he is right about that. That is a nice cover. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah the book is pretty good- I read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Well I- I will definitely make it a point to uh- read it. Very soon. <br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Audible over the others]'' Did you ever read Twilight?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I've heard th- I've heard Twilight and I've seen the trailer but I haven't seen the movie, I'll wait for it to come out DVD or Blu-ray.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br />
===Random Access Humor Python Style===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh OK, I heard a lot of girls like Twilight. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I see. Hey Polly does your voice sound like that, 'cause it sounds like [[BlueSpike|a guy talking falsetto]]. I mean no personal offense. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> That's not very nice...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm sorry. Believe me I didn't mean any pe- anything personal it's just like, you know- hm- kind- just kinda takes me by surprise a bit, that's all.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I knew a girl like that in high school.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Sounding upset]'' I can't help it if I'm born like this.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I'm- I'm- I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah she's a girl. I saw her pics. She's a girl.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I'll s- I'll take his word for it. I'm sorry I cu- I accused you there.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um. OK. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You know, aut- I mean- let's- it's just uh- you know it's uh- you know it's uh a bit- just a spot of fun. [[Random-access_humor|Stupid humor]]. Monty Python's Flying Circus. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> We know you love that. There's just so many references to it in the comic. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah I d- after they put all of the entire series on PlayStation Network I downloaded the Hamlet episode- that was the one that had uh- Jimmy Hill parodying himself. It also had this funny bit where it was like, you know- ''[in a stupid voice]'' "...and now it's time for The Robinsons, an everyday story about blah-de-blah-de-blah-de-blah. Dum-de-dum-de-dum-de-duhhh-dum-de-dum"- and so on...<br />
<br>''[A troll begins to speak but is interrupted by a very high-pitched Chris]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> "Morning Mrs. Robinson- Morning Mrs. Robinson. Comin' out shoppin'? Oh- you've been shoppin', what did you buy? What's this?-" 'What did you buy this for?'[Trolls laugh over him]'' -It was a bargain!"<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I've heard you do that before. I don't know where. Anyway uh- uhm- Whatever happened to Jimmy Hill? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I haven't heard from him in a long time so just assuming uh- he gave up or uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I think he got a- I think he got a, uh- children's TV program in England.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well he ain't botherin' me, so I'm not worried about him anymore.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Ye- but he's stealing Sonichu. Bastardizing it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah he did but uh- he s- but haven't seen any updates on his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' -profile, he's still doing it.<br />
<br>''[Several trolls talk over each other about him having a TV show]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Fails At Spanish Pt. 2===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' <br />
<br>''[Troll says something more about the TV show, but it's muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wants to say hi. Just forgive her English because she can't speak very well, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> All right. Just sent her the email by the way, just now. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Hey, Chris. It's me, Cassie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi, Cassie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Fine, and you?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm feelin' OK. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Why haven't you emailed me? I was really about-was really worried about you. What's happened? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry. I be- I've bee- I've been busy with the Internet and the stress and all that. I sent ya an email just now go- it's got my Wii number in it so you can add me to your contacts. I've been talking to uh- I've been talking to Sarah lot- quite a bit lately. She's been helping me with uh- updating the Sonichu site, since I've uh- since I'm working on uh- it's re-uploading and such. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Kay, I believe you. I going to check ''[pronounced like 'sheg']'' it, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You're going to where?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[very quietly]'' Check it.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> To check it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> To "shag-it"? Is that the-<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Check the email. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[still doesn't understand]'' Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> I going to check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, check email. ''[Laughs]'' Yeah I'm sorry I tr- I tried to uh- understand but it just kind of messed up a little bit. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don- why don't you two speak in Spanish?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhh. I'm not exactly fluent. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ¿Sabes hablar español, Chris? (Do you know how to speak Spanish?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí, hablo español. (Yes, I speak Spanish)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Oh. ''[pause, one of the trolls says something to her]'' Oh, eso es muy sexy. (That is very sexy.)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Ohhhh. Te gusta. Te gusta muchísimo, (You like it. You like it a lot)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> La verdad, si. (To tell you the truth, yes)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Me amos mis amigas muchísimas. Sons muy bueñas! (I love my friends (feminine) a lot. They are very good.) [Correction: Amo a mis amigas muchísimo. Son muy buenas.] <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Oh, eso es tan cool en español! Muy bueno! (That's so cool in Spanish! Very good)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Muy bueño (very good)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Aha, exacto. (it is!)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]'' Okay, that's good. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Well, I going down, okay?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Okay, you're going down- by the way, let me ask ya Cassie, do you ever- you've uh- you've actually met uh Sarah May in person, haven't you? <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Not. She's on Internet.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Okay. That's cool- but anyway uh- you got- you d- you have my Wii number, uh- you can reply the email with your Wii number and it'll be registered on the Wii network. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[very haltingly]'' Yes. So. Cool. Talk with you Chris. You are so cool. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Heh. Uhhhh. You flatter me. Tú me flatteray. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[Weak laugh]'' Well, see you. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[In his 'baby voice']'' Adiós. ''[sigh]'' <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós, bebé.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós, chiquita bonita. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>[Pause as audio cuts out]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -it again. <br />
<br>[Another pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So anyway, Chris. I've been working on Rabbichoso for a day and uh- I was just wonderin' like, it's- it's supposed to compete with the Sonichu, you know? If you weren't aware of that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhhh. I grabbed onto d- grabbed onto g I- grabbed onto the... that gist. I'm aware- I'm aware of the gist of the theory. Uh. I'm aw- I'm aware that you're- that you're tryin' to compete. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know what competition does. It's drives uh- it drives consumer interest- Well that's why you know- It's great. You have to compete with high quality things. ''[muffled]''- that's why I'm trying to help. You know, compete. Just so you're aware of this, OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I see. -see. <br />
<br>[Pause]<br />
<br />
===Rabbichoso And Animu===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris we've been ge- been getting uh threatening images from the Pickle Man. Did you s- did you see the left? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I've not heard from the Pickle Man in lo- in a long time. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Apparently there are multiple ones because this one is, uh, not a darkie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh-huh. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> It's good that they're leaving you alone now. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Seems like they found more easier targets. Seeing as how you became [[Navy|saltier]].<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh. You know I originally got that line- quote from an e- ep- episode of ExCel Saga. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> From what?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> ExCel Saga.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Oh, ExCel Saga. Oh, yeah, that's a good anime.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> AIII I-Falazzo! (''He means [[ScotPalazzo|Il-Palazzo]]'')<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, have you ever seen two animes, ''[muffled]'' and Schooldays?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I have not seen either of those. I like Steel Angel Kurumi as well.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, how much Japanese do you know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only a little bit. I'm not totally fluent. I can say that with all honesty. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something unintelligible, not quite Japanese]''<!-- It sounds like he's saying "You say you can't- can you speak with me?" in CHINESE. --><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Huh?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Never mind, you won't understand it.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[unclear] Chris-Chan. Genki desu-ka?''<br />
<br />
===Chris Could Kill Clyde===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, I just wanted to say, uh, you're doing a good job, like, keeping calm even though Clyde is here. I mean u- I thought you'd be, like, more angry at him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm being calm with you guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> -I would have been choking him by now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I'd have kicked his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Preach to the choir. Pr- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I'd make him choke on a pickle if it were up to me.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You guys can't touch me otherwise I'd kick all your asses. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, bring it.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris could kick Clyde's ass anytime.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Let's see Chris do it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Bring it to me any day of the week and I'll definitely show him a hard- day's night. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah I think you could kick his ass.<br />
<br>[Trolls and Clyde talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Sings]'' -been a hard day's night...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -never mind, just...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean that as a- meant that as in I would beat... him up. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Kick his ass?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm very strong. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. I'm gonna see you later, OK?<br />
<br>''[Unison of goodbyes]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> OK see ya. Thank you so much Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[ignoring his fans]'' Yeah I can- I can lift about my weight. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Like um- if Clyde were right in front of you, what would you do to him?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Like, what kind of style of fighting do you have?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, shut up.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I gotta know my competition. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Personal- in the physical offense. ''[sigh]'' I would definitely be giving you so much physical pain. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's not a s- that's not a style. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I would beat you up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He deserves it man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, that's still not a style...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He uses fisticuffs. He's a gentleman. Gentleman fisticuffs. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Whatever, I'll just see-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Stop arguing and just-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ''[Over previous troll]'' I mean, if he did that to my sweetheart I'd fucking kill him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well. He's not- he's not going to come over and kill me, I know that. He doesn't have the money. [pause] You know I'm surprised that you're mad here. You're much kinder in person I thought you- Now I'm just expecting you at my door anytime, just waiting for you to stand here with an axe or something. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Knives are too messy. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Ah, now a sword- sword's are usually better.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What about poison?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Poison's good, poison's good.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde, what- do you want him to beat your ass?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I was just expecting it, you know.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, you know what's another thing? I would definitely not tell you how I would be hurting you, but I would definitely give you a who- big amount of pain. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, he's gonna keep you guessin'!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he deserves it. After everything he's done-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Muffled by troll]'' -going to kill me, I'd like to know. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I'm just going to let you cover in- worry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh so you're never going to show up, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Oh yes I will show up. But you just won't be expecting it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't even know where I live, do you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Find out!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Maybe I should give you my address. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, you should track him down and kick his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> But I'm going to leave you guessing too...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Defend Panda's h- Panda's honor.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, hi Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> 'sup Julie.<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br>''[Everyone talks over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde's A Dick===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I notice her mic doesn't work. But still I'm just letting her know that- acknowledge her presence. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're doing well staying calm even though Clyde's here.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, Clyde's a total dick.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Fucker.<br />
<br>''[Rustling]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I mean, he's taken over everything. The IRC. This. I can't- no one can stop him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' -over there, so...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll:'''</font> I- I like Rabbichoso.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Of course you do. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll''':</font> It's funny. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I will not offer any new comment on it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, OK. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, when can we expect the next Sonichu to be released.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, we've been eager.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It'll be soon. It will be soon.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah just ignore Clyde man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean if you're going to put a hard date on it, you'd better deliver your promise. If you don't, I'll strike harder. That's all I'm saying.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. You're saying if I don't set a date, you're gonna...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no. I'm saying don't make promises you can't keep. Don't make promises you can't keep.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He'll choke you with his medallion bitch!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who the hell do you think you are?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I agree with Cogs over there. Maybe you should do just a page a day, not release all at once. Keep his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you telling him this when he hates you?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm giving him suggestions man, OK? OK?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Only thing he's gonna suggest to you is 'shut the fuck up'!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, seriously man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It's alright. <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Penny Arcade's slow.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh you mean like Penny Arcade or 8-Bit Theater or MegaTokyo?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah like they're just boring. Then they became kind of sellouts.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Country Cookin===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Chris, where's your favorite place to eat?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. Can't really say uh- but I like country cookin'. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> What's country cooking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh no G's in the sto- no G's in the name by the way, no G. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah what's country cooking? I'm not familiar with that.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's like uh- som- something like Golden Corral. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But Golden Corral is a national franchise.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh Chris, how are your parents?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> They're OK.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br>[Long pause]<br />
<br />
===Sex Is Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I've got a sug- another suggestion. Now be quiet all of you cause I know you hate me. Just- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, Chris hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well don't defend him. He can defend himself OK? He's a man. But whatever-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let him speak.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm suggesting that- you go on and on about this sex stuff but you've never gotten laid, have you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I like to put myself in the imaginative situation that I'd like to be in and the sexual stimulation. So I can be ready for [[ego|myself]] for when I do actually have my first time.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well my first time was- I'll just say that it's terrible, OK? I didn't know what I was doing, she didn't know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let me guess, you prematurely ejaculated?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no, it's not like that you don't know what to do. Every woman's told me OK? You can't prepare-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Clyde]'' First time's always awkward...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -I learnt that mistake a while back, OK whatever. OK, you just- you can't prepare for your first time. You might as well just have a really bad first time so you learn from your mistakes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm not trying to defend Clyde or anything, but yeah it's kinda true. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Hmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The girl I first fell in love with is the girl I'm married to right now. Samantha just changed my world. But marriage does get boring.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Tips To STAY STRAIGHT===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I know how you say how important it is to stay straight, um- I'm having trouble staying straight, do you have any suggestions?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Watch a bunch of pornography with uh- with naked women. OK, a lot of naked women.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That happened to me one time...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, I have this friend I play video games with, is that gay? He's male by the way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry could you- I'm sorry could you repeat that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I have this guy I'm friends with he always comes over to my house to play video games. Is that gay? I'm kinda scared. You know? I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Hmm. Is he making any advances towards you? Personally. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I dunno how to tell. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Like uh sit- does he always sit next to you when he's playing games. Playing video games.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Yeah he usually does. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I see. Hmm. My- well- my suggestion in that case, would be to keep a heavy distance between you and that guy. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he meant anything gay by it though. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he means anything like- gay about it. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well, still- it's always best to find out- you can ask him. Don't be afraid to ask him. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> What would you do in this situation?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well if he said yes then I would uh- basically- let me think about that a moment. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you have any friends who're are like, guys?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only acquaintances and only a few of them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you play video games with people or anything? Do they come over to your house?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. No.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I remember-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> ''[Cuts Polly off]'' I'm just worried I might be gay or something. I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You probably are Falsion, but that's OK. No, look dude. It's okay to be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Leave him alone! Leave him alone! He's straight!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Why?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Hey, let's have a calm conversation here. Let's not have any fights.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br>''[Trolls speak over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I've been reading the Sonichu comics and man, they are page-turners! Seri- I was on- I was on the edge of my seat for a while. I ju- I couldn't- I couldn't- you know. Just had to read and read.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Thank you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, can I be your friend? I know I'm a guy. I don't mean anything gay by it. Can I be your friend? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. I dunno.<br />
<br />
===A Wild Snorlax Appears===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Do you want any hotdogs?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No thanks, I'm OK. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> No?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I was talking with my mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I was wondering if I could be your friend.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I h- heard you only like, you only like to be acquaintances. With guys. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, ummm. Yeah. Let's just pretty much leave it at acquaintance. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hello Mrs. Chandler. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> She can't hear you, I'm wearing my earphones.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Listen, I'm not gay. I don't- you know- yeah. Never mind.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I mean- I mea- I-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What do you have against gay people? I'm serious to hear this. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's just unnatural and it's against God's will. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, it's not like it's a choice. You can't change who you are like- you're a creative guy but I mean they're just gay. They can't change that. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm just answering a few questions mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You don't have to answer. Nobody's payin' you to do that.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yes they are.<br />
<br>''[shuffling sounds, clanging]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> It ain't none of their business no-way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I wouldn't be asked questions like that by employers or anybody. Don't tell people what you d- what you think. Keep that to yourself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris what's hap- what's happening?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, obviously, my mother is offering her input.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Tell her you're just talking to some friends. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' I don't need no back talk from somebody on the other end of the phone.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear you, Mom. Hmm. Hmm. <br />
<br>''[scraping sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> These- these idiots don't have any brains or- they don't have any idea this way or that.<br />
<br>''[more banging, clanging and tumbling sounds. Sounds like washing up]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Is right now a bad time right now? I mean-<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Pixelblocks, Pixelblocks!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Someone's saying "Pixelblocks." <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you saying [[Pixelblocks]]?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>''[Chris's mom has been singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful singing voice, Chris.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[Audio cuts back in]'' -all the anxiety, causing you stress.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, well sometimes they don't; they can be peaceful.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Well, your mom and dad get the crappy end of the stick.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm, a lot of us do.<br />
<br>''[more clattering sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Yeah, just like this nasty mess over here that you guys left that I got to clean up.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm. ''[Audio cuts]'' -Yeah, I took care of my bills. I mean, not completely, but I took care of them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> What about going to, uh, Redmond?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> We! (Wii?) <br />
<br>[unintelligible, windows beeps]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[laughing]'' Yeah, sweetheart pool.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Mmhmm. ''[laughing]'' Like the other side of the pillow.<br />
<br>''[someone sighing. Clanging noises return after short absence]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' ...is all, I mean, living with your parents is okay bad-in today's bad economy, but at 26, come on. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Shut up, you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I'm being nice.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde isn't so bad a guy. He does bad things, but he's pretty cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah he's reformed. He's seen the error- Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How- how could he do that to Sarah? I mean- That's not right.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah. Well, that's like Luke... That's like Luke and Laura from General Hospital. I know that's like, before y'all's time, but, um... Luke was a rapist and she-he raped Laura and then, like, a few months later they get married. So... ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, I believe Clyde was trying to make amends from his past actions.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, but Chris, can you uh- can you forgive him?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Random Troll:'''</font> ''[whispering]'' White whale, holy grail! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Can you forgive a small-dicked Asian? Just a thought.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He's not Asian! <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm half-Asian, okay? My parents ''[unclear]'' I don't really wanna go into it. It's too bo-boring for you people. But this is why I ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you there? Just makin' sure, buddy.<br />
<br>''[clattering]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Move out.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Another Troll''':</font> Well, how do I do that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi there, my kitty. ''[In baby voice]'' Yes, there's a pretty kitty.<br />
<br>''[Someone speaking with a voice-synth]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hang on a second. I've got, like, a thousand different... Oh, Crass, why'd you do that?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Because. You can unban him but, yeah. I'm not gonna friggin' stand for that. <br />
<br>''[Sound of a vacuum cleaner]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> I (m j d?) do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I heard the "g" word.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um, is that a vacuum cleaner?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Yeah, sounds like it is.<br />
<br>[Trolls speak but are drowned out by vacuum]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ...room or something.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I think the vacuum cleaner... <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If that's the government trying to do some kind of thing, then my name's Rusty Shackleford.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's a loud fan.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I have a fan above my stove, too.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Hey... I do, too.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Wait- wha- wait. You-you-you're in the kitchen? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Me too.<br />
<br>''[possibly Sonic game sound effects]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmhm? Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I'm pretty sure it's already asked, but I didn't catch the answer. When can we expect the next Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I-I-I told you my suggestion of releasing a page a day or something. I mean, it's a pretty good one. It-it-it allows for a good time. Finish a page a day. You upload it. You know? It's very good. Works very well.<br />
<br>''[Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh. I mean- you guys keep asking when he's going to finish it but I wonder how many pages are going to be in the new one? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> The last one was like, thirty. Just release it over the span of a month. Works fine. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...go up to ninety thousand...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[mutters something]''<br />
<br>''[Sound of Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Down by the river...side.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful voice, Chris.<br />
<br>''[clattering, typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[unclear, repeating the same two phrases]'' Gone down by the river, down by the water side, down by the riverside. Down by the waterside. Down by the riverside.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember ''[unclear]''<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -I'm hungry myself.<br />
<br>''[some kind of alarm sounding]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Then go eat.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I already ate.<br />
<br />
===Anime And Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I wonder what anime Chris watches nowadays. There's not many on television but do you still watch Japanese cartoons? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[In a bad accent]'' Kawaii desu ne. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I want to watch Shuffle. He said it was very good. He said it was sad. I don't know if I wanna watch- I don't like sad stuff. I like to be happy when I watch anime.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, and um, do you watch stuff like Bleach and um Code Geass or Naruto or something?<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I'm glad to hear that Shuffle isn't sad. I'm definitely going to watch it sometime.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um, yeah Chris that was a good call on Naruto. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah there's a lot of people who don't like it much either. Too popular.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But please. Please. Hope. ''[audio cuts out briefly]'' Uh, Chris, please consider When They Cry.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Ooh, I saw that one. It was a really good series.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, I know; that was good, like- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah. Both seasons of it. <br />
<br>''[Windows beeps, voices overlapping]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I could link you to Season One if you want. Yeah, Samantha got me into that. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...you'll give it a try, Chris. It's a very, very good series.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Hm. Hey, Julie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...lots of ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Watch Shuffle. You got the six episodes of Shuffle or... Which o- which anime? I'm sorry. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh and JoJo's Bizarre Adventure is also cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I really liked JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. Very ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Za warudo!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah, I think Shuffle is quite all right. I like Heidi. She's sweet and loyal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> That's a good one. One of my favorites is Black Lagoon.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris have you ever seen La Blue Girl?<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other about different anime]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, uh, Chris can I, my, uh, I don't know if it's all right, but, like, could you like, give me an email sometime? I could, uh... recommend you to... this anime that... Polly and... Julie like to watch. They're quite- they... Oh, C-and Cogs has recommended such great anime. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[talking to his mother]'' Yeah? That's ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> As well as Julie-Julie's the person that got me into anime.<br />
<br />
===People Love Poketunes===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> -we can go into this later cause I got my headphones on. And, Mom, you know what something else? They liked your singing.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> What? I don't sing.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> That's my laugh; that's my laugh. They couldn't hear me. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They heard you. Singin'. Just now.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I can't sing!<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I'm tone deaf. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They just heard you singing, and liked your voice.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay. Did you write checks for all those bills and pack everything ''[unclear]''?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yes, Mother, I did.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You're not telling me no story?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm not telling you no story.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> OK. It's important [''inaudible''] did you pay them?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, I paid that one. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay, you have to be honest with me, 'cause, see, you're settin'...<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm being honest, I'm being honest.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> How you respond to what [we] talk about. You say you ought to something and you don't do it then that's gonna change my ideas ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay... I'll be sure to pay the remaining differences next month. Alright?<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> No, pay this month.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I know but I couldn't pay them all with 90 dollars so there's still some left ''[sound cuts]'' ...oh, you're cooking them up here, okay, that's why you turned the fan on above the stove.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br>''[Trolls rejoice and mock Momma Chandler]''<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 1|Mumble Chat 1]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 3|Mumble Chat 3]]|}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Spanish]]<br />
==Links==<br />
*[https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBOVVDS0JtSDNvMWs Download]<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_2&diff=163026Mumble 22012-09-26T23:52:42Z<p>Irisviel: /* People Love Poketunes */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{Articleofthenow}}<br />
[[Image:0839-MomDesi.JPG|thumb|right|180px|In Mumble 2, a Wild [[Barbara Chandler|Snorlax]] appeared.]]<br />
<br />
'''Mumble 2''' is the second [[Mumble]] chat that took place on 4 [[February 2009]]. More than an hour long.<br />
<br />
This is a more organized Q&A type chat than [[Mumble 1]]. Questions from [[Clyde]] about [[sex]] in the [[comic]] and interesting tidbits about how Chris believes sex is the same as romance. This is pretty hard hitting, with stuff like how Chris is into [[McDonald's|fast food]] yet he's against tobacco. A lot of drama involving Clyde.<br />
<br />
Length: '''1:49:17'''<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
<br />
===Notes===<br />
* Chris doesn't like Clyde because he stole his sweetheart.<br />
* Audio cuts out for a minute before Chris says: "...HYMEN!" (You broke her hymen)<br />
* Trolls claim [[Panda]] is with Clyde, Chris wants to hear her voice, they say she's busy<br />
* 'She and I WERE very close'<br />
* Chris didn't have $400-$800 to go and see Panda; claims he got this number from an airport website recommended by [[Miyamoto]]<br />
* Insists on [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] being in ''[[Animal Crossing]]''<br />
* Doesn't want to talk about his deal with them<br />
* Insists that he doesn't have to turn down his radio since his voice is louder (''it is horribly loud in the mic'')<br />
* Panda gave Clyde all of the sites, etc.<br />
* [[Sarah]] is going to be with Clyde, which Chris wants to deny<br />
* These motherfuckers keep talking over each other<br />
* Calls a troll's critique crap<br />
* [[Bubbles]] must be aroused, she isn't wet all the time<br />
* Bubbles is 90% water so does sperm just swim around forever? NO<br />
* Clyde: This is a children's comic, why so much sex?<br />
: '''Chris:''' It is romance. My best artwork is when they're making out 'romantic moments', drawn in protest to trolls. Shows that [[Rosechu]]s have vaginas, not [[duck]]s.<br />
* Admits to maybe going overboard<br />
* Trolls try to reason with him about the [[ED]] article: There wouldn't be an article if he didn't react like he does.<br />
* Trolls say that TV-Y7 means NO SEX but Chris points to romantic anime that have making out (cartoons are for kids, whatever the content).<br />
* Trolls talk about Japan being less strict about those things<br />
* Everyone gets to vote in [[CWCville]], even if they're [[Niggos|black]].<br />
* Got his idea from [[Mary Poppins]].<br />
* Troll tries to give historical background about cough medicine putting kids to sleep. Chris insists it was the lullaby that put them to sleep.<br />
* Discussion about Chris, 'gay message' sent by a troll<br />
* He calls Clyde a scoundrel<br />
* BELIEVE HIM HE IS STRAIGHT<br />
* Chris tries to speak Mexican at 20:50<br />
* Mexican speaks Mexican to him... he replies in Menglish<br />
* [[4-cent_garbage]] is located in Mexico<br />
* Someone says that he needs to improve his Mexican<br />
* Chris is against smoking, CWCville is smoke and alcohol free<br />
* Rehash of why [[tobacky]] is bad, his position on it, alcohol=bar fights<br />
* Chris's dad smoked and had several bypasses, has a pacemaker and has had heart attacks<br />
* Mention of his hair cuttings for his fans<br />
* Chris was doing math in his head, got in car crash.<br />
* Chris has taken college level math. Took trigonometry.<br />
* Trolls gang up on Clyde for stealing Panda<br />
* Time will tell when Chris will make the money he would have in the Nintendo deal<br />
* Trolls bash Clyde for his pot smoking <br />
* Chris doesn't watch news because it's bad news =(<br />
* Bashing of the Mexican<br />
* Chris can type 30 to 100 WPM, but can't type and talk at the same time<br />
* Chris says [[PSN]] is free though Clyde(?) points to the $1,000 Chris spent on PSN<br />
* Chris has been typing for 15 minutes now and it is VERY loud<br />
* Chris has been busy IRL therefore the comic release doesn't have a date<br />
* Someone points to nudes on [[YouTube]].<br />
* He does not have it on the YouTube, but he isn't going to take it anymore.<br />
* Claims some of the photos are photoshopped.<br />
* Clyde offers help to take ED page down.<br />
* Chris denies taking those pictures, doesn't want to talk about it, making him uncomfortable.<br />
* Some of the pictures are real. When questioned which ones are fake, Chris can't answer.<br />
* Chris hates Harry Potter because it was in competition with [[Pokémon]]!<br />
* Chris is too stressed to read Vivian's [[A Girl Who Brought Down the World|book]], but he likes the cover!<br />
* Polly, who has been talking the whole time is confronted by Chris who thinks she is a guy. Polly is upset. Chris apologizes.<br />
* [[Jimmy Hill]] has launched his Sonichu show<br />
* More Mexican talk at 55:10<br />
* Chris giggles and sighs happily when Cassie, another Mexican, compliments him and when she leaves he says 'Chiquita Bonita'<br />
* Rabbichoso talk (Sonichu.info)<br />
* Classic trolls are leaving Chris alone.<br />
* Chris likes Steel Angel Kurumi (''quote from [[Wikipedia:Steel Angel Kurumi|Wikipedia]]: often classified as ecchi due to the focus on fanservice and panty shots'')<br />
* Chris claims to be very strong, could beat Clyde up. Says he would show Clyde a [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force|Hard Day's Night]], and would give Clyde pain.<br />
* ShinyMarshtomp makes an appearance? Likes Rabbichoso<br />
* Chris likes to eat at [[Country Cookin]] (''like Golden Corral'')<br />
* Chris likes to imagine his first time. <br />
* Clyde says the first time is awful, Chris said it was because Clyde prematurely ejaculated<br />
* Watch porn with naked women to cure your gay<br />
* Guys sitting next to you = gay coming on to you<br />
* Falsion has been in the chat room and is afraid he is gay<br />
* A wild Snorlax appears<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
<br />
===Waiting for Chris===<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I can't wait to hear Chris! I'm a huge fan!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, goddamn these noodles are fantastic. Man, I wish I could eat like this everyday.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Have you eaten the rice balls?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no. These are noodles. These are-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Fan-fucking-tastic.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now they're all gone, it's fantastic, you know?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Sweetangie is Chris. Or, we think so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's definitely not the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm disappointed there's so many impostors out there. Kinda my fault, but, you know, if it weren't- ''[unintelligible]'' -hard to come by.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His mic was working last time he was here, just fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He usually capitalizes his words, like in every sentence.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is- I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Is it set to push to talk or something?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You better get us your email address Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah its push to talk. It's called push to talk. It's fantastic ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, just have him set it to voice activity. It works so much better that way.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Aww, he left.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> You guys are fucking idiots.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other again]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You guys scared him off by being guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, you fucking jackasses. Nice going.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Was that even the real...?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yes, that was the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He's too much of a pussy to talk.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, cause you scared him, or some- No, or he's too stupid to be.<br />
<br>''[Trolls Laugh]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Arrives===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Chris arrives, with radio playing loudly]'' Hello.<br />
<br>''[Trolls all greet him]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, now-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Why haven't you got your microphone working?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't know why my microphone [is] messed up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry, but we had an impostor here before.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm registered. I've got myself registered now. So, uh, hopefully-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> That's probably why. It had to like, uh- calibrate.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Well, I'm calibrated now.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So, Chris, have you seen Rabbichoso, it's fantastic.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't give a crap about your stupid pencil sketch.<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am not listening. I do not have to listen to ''you''.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Why, I'm not understanding [inaudible]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well for one thing,and I'll say it on here, you stole my sweetheart!<br />
<br>''[Cutout continues]''<br />
<br />
===PandaHalo, Trip to Redmond and Animal Crossing===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You broke her hymen!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I know it's a terrible mistake, but I plan to make it up to her. I'm getting married and uh- I'm doing the things I should do.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh and another thing, if she is really over there with you now, then put her on the mic. Please.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> She's not- He never said-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, Chris, she's very busy, OK. She's very busy.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's not over here right now. Okay? So lets drop it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, fine. Well could you tell her to please send me a message lettin' me know, for sure, so I can know- so I can know to-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' I'll let her know whatever you want, but it's her life. She doesn't have to send you a message. You failed her. You failed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' She and I were very close.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If you we're so close, then why didn't you go?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' Because I had- Aw, hang on a second. How do I- oh, that's right. This thing. Right. Mmm. Hold on a sec. Oh yeah, because I did not have four to eight hundred dollars!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It doesn't cost that much to go cross-country man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes it does. I know, I saw it on an airport website. Where I was be- Where I was- recommended to me by Mr. Miyamoto.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, you can drive there. It's not that hard.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened with that? I thought, um, didn't you have a deal with them or something? I heard a rumor that your characters were going to be in Animal Crossing.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, they are in Animal Crossing. And I did- and I do- I did have a deal with them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened though?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' I'd rather not say.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Radio, Clyde and Criticism===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, why don't you turn down the TV? It's hard to hear you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Annoyed sigh]'' I do not have a TV turned on in here.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I can hear it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have a radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I hear something in the background.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Burping throughout sentence]'' Well that's the- that would b- the radio. And it is not that loud.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But it shows up pretty well on your microphone mic. With due respect.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But still, my voice is louder than the radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Ah goo- ahh given.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh, Chris? Uh, when are you going to do the new Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something over Polly]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' Uh, I'll answer Polly's question. I'm not sure. It's, uh, it's in progress right now, I'm drawing it up.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I can't wait to read it!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Well, we'll see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Listen, Clyde kind of has admin on here, so we can't really do anything about him. So, yeah. I don't know.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Hard to hear over Chris's radio]'' ...with you guys. I love you guys. Just as much as Chris loves you guys. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I was angry. I was angry. But I'm calm now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't try to hurt any other person from now on.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm doing the best I can. I'm doing the best I can.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have much- I do not have much to say in response to that right now. Because I'm ticked off.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't let him get to you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're no better than he is, if you give in.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris, I just wanted to let you know I'm a huge fan of the comics, and I'm glad you keep doing what you're doing. You're doing a great job, and just keep it up, alright man?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, yeah, I appreciate the, uh, what's the word I'm looking for? The, the, uh- well, the encouraging words. Encouragement. I appreciate the encouragement. Well, there are things, uh- I- er- current events I do not appreciate. I appreciate the positive encouragement.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I can't really do anything. He took over the IRC channel. I used to be the owner. I mean Clyde. He's like taking over everything.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, it was because Panda gave it to me, you know. But anyway, I mean, you can't just listen to encouragement, you've got to listen to criticism, man. Criticisms are what make you better, you learn from your mistakes. You learn from mistakes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Be right back guys, my wife is calling.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I don't- I don't- Tons of people don't like the Rabbichoso art style, but you know, I gotta improve on that. That's something I plan to improve on. There's a lot of criticism in the death of Sonichu, right? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What? What did you just say?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a lot of criticism of Sonichu. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. For a moment there I thought you said something different.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What, what did you think I said? I'm just saying, there are people who like it and people who don't like it. You gotta start taking in those suggestions. You know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. So many things that will be improved upon. But, I just have to hear from Sarah herself that she really is going to be with you, Clyde. I have to hear it from herself. It's one thing to hear it from you and then it's- then on that note, it's just I find it very hard to believe. So I have to hear it from her.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I kinda think that Rabbichoso sucks. I mean, I think it could be funny, but it honestly looks like it's drawn by a kindergartner.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, Sonichu has evolved over the years. You can see that the art's getting better. Rabbichoso doesn't even look like something a beginner would do, honestly. I mean, ''[Interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A whole bunch of crap!<br />
<br>''[Everyone starts talking at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, Sonichu is in color.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I know, I accept his criticism. But you just called it crap! Now that's just rude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have emotions going behind me- uh, behind that opinion.<br />
<br />
===Cassie===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, did you get my message.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Aren't you going to be the gentleman, then? Aren't you gonna be the gentleman?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I just want to ask you, Chris. I'm Cassie's friend. She- she's worried sick about you. Why haven't you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did email her! As a- I- I haven't gotten any re-plies from her. I have emailed her and I have instant messaged her on A.I.M. and Skype. I haven't heard back from her. I don't know what's going on there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> ...you emailed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> When was the last time you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, hang on, I'll check.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris? I have a question. My fa- One of my favorite new characters is, um, Simonla, and like, I also like Zapina as well. Um, are they gonna have bigger parts in the series later on?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, could you repeat that question?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I was wondering if Simonla and Zapina will either have bigger parts in the series later on. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [[Sonichu_10#The_Final_Countdown|Possibly]]. Possibly, but, uh, I can't say for sure. Oh, and, uh, to answer your question, uh- in answer to, uh, I believe, uh, Screwhead, who asked? It was about four days ago. About four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Yeah. Four days ago? Okay, I'll tell her to check it out.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> The last email I sent was about four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> She'll contact you in a while, though.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I'll tell her to check it out and- and thanks Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright. Mm.<br />
<br />
===Bubbles's Pussy and Sex in the Comics===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris? I have a question.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, my favorite character is Bubbles, I kinda liked the, uh, the thing she had going with Blake, where she was kind of keeping the relationship secret. I thought that was kinda clever. I was wondering, uh, she's a water-type, so does that mean that her vagina is always wet, or does she have to be aroused like a normal woman?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, aroused. That's applied for all the, uh, Rosechus there. And also, like, you know, she's not just a water-type, she's also- she's a water- and electric-type, like uh- oh, shoot- What's the name of that one? Originated from Gold-Silver-Crystal series, uh, evolves from Chinchou? Lanturn. And she has, uh, she has Volt Absorb ability.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, Chris, another question following Bubbles. Uh, her body is 90% water, and now this thing about the whole sexual intercourse- about it. Now, don't take this rude, and you don't need to answer me... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...I totally respect your creative work. My wife actually got me into this, uh, show actually. So, what happens is- like, as you know, like, semens are like little fishes in themselves. Would that mean, I mean, would they actually have a route to fly into the egg, in theory, or do they just swim around her whole body, just forever just swimming around.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. The, uh, the internal or- the internal organs uh, for the Rosechus are pretty much the same thing, so I'd say pre- about, uh, as good chance as most any other mammal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, so you mean she's able to control her density a little bit more. She- I understand now. She's able to control more her density from the 90% water. Okay. That pretty much answers it just perfectly. That's been bothering me at work. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I got another question, Chris, about this whole sexual thing. I mean, this is a children's comic, right? Why is there so much sex in it?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. It's called romance, and my- and my- if you'll notice throughout the comics my best pieces of artwork among which were those where dey were kissing and making out. Romantic moments.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a hidden page-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' And because- and because- and because of the tension from, uh, the trolls and Encyclopedia Dramatica, I just felt like doing that in protest against them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, but childre-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' Yes but how is that really a protest? That, you know, you know, are, are you like referencing to the 60's when women burned their bras? That was in protes- That was feminism. Saying that they weren't slaves to men. Do you even understand the whole thing?<br />
<br>''[Multiple voices are heard at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Now, to tell you the truth, I never really thought about, I never really thought about that when I-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Chris]'' Then how is, stripping was, how was that protest-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Jack]'' It shows that they have vaginas and NOT dicks. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well you know the dick thing was the fact that they were just, you know, mocking you. I think you went overboard with that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well maybe I did. Maybe I did. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, you did, because that seems kind of excessive, kind of-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' I don't think they would have even bothered to write about an article about you if you didn't just keep reacting like that.<br />
<br />
===Chris justifies sex in a kids' comic===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I have another question.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The point some of us are trying to make is, if it's TV-Y7 that means there should really be no sex in it at all.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible over other people]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's pretty much incorrect, I mean, uh, there's so many romantic anime that's TV-Y7, and they shoul- they have making out.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, a lot of things in Japan, Japan has stricter standards-not stricter, I mean looser guidelines than America. It's much different.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear ya.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I was just wondering what Bubbles, um, she has a, that water whirlwind attack, I was just curious if you had any plans to make- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Butting in]'' By the way, that was a Whirl- Whirlpool.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font>Yeah, Whirlpool, sorry, sorry, Whirlpool, but do you have any plans to mix an, uh, Electric-type attack with that, since water conducts electricity, right? It could be a very powerful-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah, she did, she did an electric attack amongst the- the walls of that Whirlpool and she let out. In case you didn't know, there's a- little bits of lightning bolts among which-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, oh, I'm sor- I didn't notice that, I'm sorry, I'll go take another look. Thank you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hey Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> You make some pretty sweet Little Big Planet levels.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you.<br />
<br />
===Chris on Benadryl babysitting===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, there's a message from Cogs on the side, it's about, uh, do women not have the right to vote already in CWCville.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, evry- Everybody, no matter what age, no matter what gender or race, everybody has the right to vote in CWCville. Even if they're black.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Then what's up with the "Votes for Women" thing, I was-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Not just vote women, but- ''[interrupted]'' any other ethnicities, and gays?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't understand-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did that- heard it in Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What? Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, man, Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, yeah, that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's a classic. It's my favorite movie of all time.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that movie was, like, based in the 1900s.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but still I- still I agreed with that message there-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Taken out of context, that makes it seem like CWCville's set in the 1960s.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What message? That children should be given cough medicine so they'll go to sleep?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''What?''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that's what women used to do back in- That's what mothers, friggin' nurses and stuff used to do to kids in the 1900s, is give children, like, you know, cough medicine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Cause- cause the medicine- uh, correction, the medicine did not put them to sleep, there was a lullaby, not the cough medicine. They only had to take the cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ...because it rained, before dere, and it was not, and it was to, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Rain means cough medicine doesn't have anything to do with each other. That's not how friggin' germs are spread, or colds are gotten. Colds are gotten through germs, not the rain.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How is cough medicine any different from today's parents that just let their kids watch TV until they fall asleep? I mean, it's just as bad.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well- Cough medicine has a lot to do with the psychological effects of it. Obviously if you get- if you keep giving fre-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Thanks, Samantha, that was delicious.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's my, uh, Samantha-<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, that's we're all saying, cause I've heard that there's a lot of different chemicals in cough medicine. You could pick up a ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I don't even take cough medicine, because I'm not a pussy.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Anyway, I never put any references, I never did any references or plan any references to cough medicine or anything of that sort.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Well, Chris, Cassie says the last e-mail she got from you was on the 17th. How 'bout your being gay? Is that true?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[sigh]'' That wa- That was somebody had- That was Clyde hacking through my e-mail and spammed that to my contacts.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, I definitely did not do that-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You're a scoundrel-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -a slanderous lie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I did not do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Whoa-whoa-whoa. Wow. Well, thanks for that. She was worried that you were- that you don't like her.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> You're a scoundrel, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't do that. That was someone else.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I was wondering, because I've heard other news too, I was really hoping that you weren't gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Believe me, I'm straight.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I'll take your word for it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you. And, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Cogs- Cogs got a way- she showed us that, okay? I mean, you only ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br />
===Chris's fail-riffic Spanish===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So, Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, Screwhead's from Mexico. I heard you like Spanish, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hola, Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You know Spanish, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí. Conoso Mexico. Tomé dos años ''[unclear]'' mi escuela secundaria. (Yes, I know Mexico. I took two years [in, possibly] my secondary school.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has venido en Mexico? (Have you come to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, lo siento? (Uh, I'm sorry?)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has estado en Mexico? (Have you been to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Estoy Mexico? No. (I am Mexico? No.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[slowly]'' Has estado, um, in Mexico. Has venir? (Have you been to Mexico? Have gone?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Uh, no, I hav- no, no tengo pansars. ''[sic]'' (no, I don't have pansars (?))<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I think, uh, I think I meant to say- I'm pretty sure-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Did you just say you don't wear pants?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, no, I was trying to say, ah, I don't have plans to go in Mexico at the moment.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's what I understood what he was saying there.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, did you know that, that 4-cent garbage website is located in Mexico?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> That's why-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, that's why they can't get it shut down.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]'' borders, plus it's cheaper to run sites over there; they have, like, several servers.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wanted to talk to you, but she couldn't make it here, well, and, she wants to be your Spanish teacher, because she says that you've got room to improve your Spanish.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Oh, that Cassie. Yeah, I'm sorry, I thought you were- I got mixed up. Um... Yeah, um, I'm sorry, I, uh, I haven't talked to that- I haven't talked to Cassie in a while, but I've been mostly talking to, uh, her gal- her, uh, gal-pal and I'm sure- I'm sure she'd tell you a lot about her...<br />
<br />
===In which the trolls discuss bar fights===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey Chris, how- how does Sonichu keep Rosechu from spending more than a hundred dollars at the mall? I've always wondered how he could manage to do that. I've always had problems with that myself.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That wa- That time at the mall, it was, uh, Kel loaned the credit card. And it's like, yeah- she gave- she gave Sonichu the responsibility of that credit card. She did.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I've always given my advice on cannabis, you should do the ''[unintelligible]'', Cogs Chris, but I think she wants your response.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, one of my friends sent me this picture, and I think you might find it kinda disturbing just because they say it's proof that you're gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Aw yeah, I saw that, that's just a crappy Photoshop.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No, that one doesn't- this one doesn't look Photoshopped at all.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'm not gonna look at it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Oh, you're not? Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, uh, you say you're against smoking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. As a matter of fact, CWCville is a smoke-free, non-alcoholic city.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[partially drowned out]'' That's what we call a totalitarian state...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, and, uh, in the pilot episode with Seth MacFarlane, of, you know, Family Guy? He's always smoking. What do you think about that?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Go smoke.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I just- I just take that with a grain of salt, and, uh, you know, that's what-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, if he can smoke, why can't anyone else? I mean, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Because it causes cancer!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> So does a lot of things.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> It could be a prop pipe.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> In any case, I'm not- in any, in any case I've never done it and I never will.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, but eating too much fast food can give you a heart attack. I mean... so many things are deadly for you.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What about fast food, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> My father used to smoke and he went through a whole bunch of heart attacks. He suffered three- <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Well, I think that might have to do more with his weight.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He suffered through three or four triple bypasses.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I think that's... that's more like a weight issue.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He has a pacemaker!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, eh...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey ya guys, leave him alone. Ya know, my granddad, he smoked most of his life. He quit for 25 years and still died of lung cancer. I mean that's just the way it is. And your body never gets rid of it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, what about ''[pause]'' Chris, what about fast food? That's- that's bad for you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey Chris. Chris, could you do me a favor and send an email to Cassie? She's very worried about you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Yeah sure, I'll send her an email later.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, thanks.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, I've got uh, a certain someone you know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No no.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -she has to, uh, she wants to ask you w- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Also, she said something about some hair.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh yeah. Yeah, that's uh... that's another issue right there. Um, hmmm. I'll talk to her about that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, does, uh, drinking cause cancer?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, but it causes liver dysfunction and likely bar fights and automobile accidents.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, bar fights, but— <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Bar fights!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> -but I don't think that bar fights are that big of a problem.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I think bar fights are awesome.<br />
<br>''[People agree bar fights are awesome]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> But bar fights are bad. I got into a bar fight once and one of my hands got cut and two fingers from my left hand. Bar fights suck.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well, I think that might be more because you're Mexican. Are you sure you didn't lose them picking bo- picking grapes and- or something?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> No, Mexican people are more more- more much macho man; we get into bigger fights. We're more awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No- I think it might be because you got your hands stuck in some machinery when you were out picking in the vineyards.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't know about you guys, but I like- I like having bar fights.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Crashes Due To Math===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't have to be drunk to be in a bar fight or in an automobile accident, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but they increase the likeliness of it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You've been in an autobile— automobile accident, I mean, were you drunk?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I was distracted.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Uh, by what? I mean, it's kinda hard to be dist— you gotta be focused on driving man-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I was doing math in my head.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, math in your— <br />
<br>[Trolls talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> My mind got distracted by being its own calculator.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Are you good at math?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, is that for school?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Are you some kind of savant?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's impossible.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Guys, you're getting ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you like a mathematic genius or something?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> You know some artist people have like superpowers in their head. They can do like geniuses and add really well. ''[interrupted briefly by Jack saying something else about savant]'' Chris you are already an artist. Do you have any like, magical powers?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, I heard autistic people are really good at math. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Well not all the stereo- some of that sounds like stereotypes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[talking over Chris]'' ...it has to do with mental ability; I mean, what's the...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean I don't know- I mean I'm not saying that I'm a total genius. I mean I know- I know enough to get by.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What's the highest level of math you've taken Chris?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> College level.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I mean like algebra, or calculus or...?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. I believe I just did trigonometry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Very impressive.<br />
<br>[long pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So I was wondering. When did you get the CAD degree? I figured it's like a fine arts degree or something? I mean wha-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I designed a whole- I designed buildings and machinery and such along there. I designed the whole CWCVille shopping center.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don't you have a job then?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Your fans would love to see that Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' -I mean use that to design like, actual buildings? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I think I just told you I designed the CWCVille sho-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I don't mean in your comic. I'm just saying-<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde Isn't Popular And Chris Should Program===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well it's a good st-<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I heard you got some nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'll be putting an update on da YouTube soon, but not right now. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking maybe you could like, you know, get a degree in game design and make the Sonichu game? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah man, it's not that hard to learn programming. C++ man.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">''Falsion:'''</font> Clyde, he hates you, why are you talking?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm just giving him some advice, I mean C++ is-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you here? We don't like you. You totally ruined Chris's life.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't ruin his life. He ruined his own life.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yes you did. You've ruined his life. You raped his girlfriend. <br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks at once over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If he was the man he said he was, he'd have gone to Nintendo, made all that money. How- how are you going to make money now Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Time will tell.<br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks again]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, time will tell Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font>''[unclear]'' -need a plan, you know? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking uh, if- uh- would you be interested in getting a degree in game design. Making the game or something? Like if you had to? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Maybe but uh- I still have things to sort out in my real life.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah it's kinda unfortunate what happened with the Nintendo thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah- hang on a second, I'll be right back. Mm- ''[clattering]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So be honest guys am I really that much of a bother. I mean...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah you kind of are.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like a total dickfart.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You realize weed causes cancer? <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I didn't know that. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> And it causes the munchies. You're gonna get fat, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's okay, man, because I work out.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Do you play Guitar Hero standing up?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I play Guitar Hero while on the treadmill. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Will the Sonichu game be a- ''[muffled]'' -or a Wii one?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> It be a Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Wii would like to play. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh. I only got a DS. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I heard you are very good at HTML. Why don't you make a HTML Sonichu game? That would be awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't think you can make a game in HTML.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A- anyway I came back...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hey, Chris? How many courses did you have to take to get that degree in CAD? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -pretty sure you can make a game in HTML-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[speaking over]'' I'm took abo- took about two- took about two years to four years. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, if you can write HTML you can write C++, make your own games. Pretty simple man. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well it's something I'll consider. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde why are you talking to him? He hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm trying to give him some suggestions. I'm not insulting him, OK? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> HTML seems kinda outdated, so to speak. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font>I learn- I took two HTML classes so at least I know how to do- at least I know the ins and outs when it comes to like, workin' on it in the raw data- in the notepad.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> So you don't use Dreamweaver?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I also use Net- also use Netscape composer. <br />
<br>''[Someone starts singing 'Dreamweaver']''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I heard they went bankrupt or something.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't- I don- I don't listen to news because I don't care about bad news. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But that's not bad news that's just safety...<br />
<br>''[Talking over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why you gotta bring this bad vibe in here? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> OK OK I'll chill, I'm sorry it's just my wife- ''[can't hear over Chris typing extremely loud]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris you don't hear about these ones in a while. Like yesterday some guy in my town got run over by a train and he- he died. And that's a really bad thing, you know but you have to hear about it. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yeah but that's because you're Mexican. You Mexicans always play around the train tracks, what's with you? <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No come on, don't be racist.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> It's because Mexicans are stupid. I'm surprised I can use a computer. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' CrassCrab why do you have to be so mean?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> 'Cause my mother was raped by a Mexican. And I'm part Me- ''[muffled]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry man.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> That isn't fair to take it out on every other Mexican out there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His rule applied to millions. Just ignore him.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No I'm not my mother was raped by Mexicans.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> CrassCrab I'm tired of listening to you, get out of here. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Not all Mexicans are like that we- we- I am a nice Mexican guy. Not all Mexican guys are- ''[drowned out by typing]'' -Black guys are the people you should fear.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't get me started on them. But that will be another day. Cause I'm sick of hearing bad news.<br />
<br />
===Chris Types Fast (And Hates Hex-Box)===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris what are you uh- typing there?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm typing a email. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> How many words can you type? How fast can you type? Sounding fast there. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhh say about uh- sorta between thirty and a hundred. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's quite a good range man. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like "The Flash", minus the red jump-suit.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh Chris um- I was wondering if- ''[unclear]'' -game with Nintendo, would it be uh a Wii game or a DS game or both. I only own DS and I don't have any money for a Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[overlapping]'' Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wii, DS and Pla- hopefully uh- possibly uh, PlayStation 2 or 3. Never on [[Hex_Box|Hex-Box]]. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> When you gonna do this shit?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Why don't you like the Hex-Box? I mean I have an Xbox, I would love to play online with you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'd like to say this. Before Chris says anything about that I just wanna say that today my wife came home from the mall shopping for her usual clothes, that Gucci purse I had to buy for her. You know what she came home with? I wanted a PS3 but you know what she gave me was a frickin' Xbox 360. The Elite one? ''[someone speaks over]'' I know, I kept telling her like "Honey this isn't what I wanted. I wanted the PlayStation 3 so I can play LittleBigPlanet, Metal Gear Solid and Sonic Unleashed" <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You can put Sonic Unleashed on the Hex Box as well as Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Too whiny to make out]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Nintendo just- rejected your offer? Cause I- I heard a rumor that there was going to be a Sonichu game or something. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris uh. Cassie wants you to send her your Wii number so she can talk to you on the Wii. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright uhhhhh. I'll get- have to get my Wii number now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Send it to her in an email please.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they completely hate Sony. And they hate Microsoft as well. I mean this guy, Reggie? He always talks about kicking their ass and stuff. He's kinda crazy. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I know. Reggie's very mean he never brought out Mother 3 to America. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah I wanted to play that game.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talked over]'' -I'm tellin' you guys. Reggie's just a great ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Like what?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can- I can't say anything OK but... you'll see. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah so I don't think like if you got the deal with Nintendo I don't think they'd put it on like mu- like anything else but the Wii or DS. Yeah, cause that Reggie guy he frickin' hates Sony. And Microsoft. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wasn't he also the head of VH1?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or Pizza Hut.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. What are your favorite places to eat at? <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember um Peter Moore he used to - ''[unclear]'' -but before that he was with Sega when Dreamcast was out. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yup. Let me type this email please. I mean y'all keep talking I'll just listen. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's no reason to hate the Xbox. To be honest.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or um- Chris um- do you wanna release your game on Nintendo and on Sony. If you do talk to somebody like EA or something, you can like do um- multi-console thing like a third party thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[busy typing]'' Hmm. Well it's all to think about. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I mean Sega does third party now so um- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah well I'm gonna keep typing this email here. Y'all keep talking. <br />
<br>''[Sound of Chris typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's true, it's true. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Chris I wanted to tell you that Cassie's going to be here any- any second so you can talk to her. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Hm. ''[continues typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Don't you care about her? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[annoyed]'' I'm typin' da email to her right now! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah um 360 is pretty bad it um- red-rings all the time. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> I've had mine over two years. The same one. And it has not red-ringed yet. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Dude you have to pay $50 just so you can play online. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[echoing]'' Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah it's bullshit.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah it's totally free on PlayStation. And Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris. Chris. No, no, no, no, I gotta talk about this. [long pause] Chris...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupting]'' I get less connection problems myself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can't let you get away with this Chris. You spent over $1000 on the PlayStation Network. OK? And you say you can't afford $50 for the Xbox? Terrible reason. That's a terrible reason. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, um, Cogs I had a friend of mine whose red-ringed a lot of times. She did not like it at all. She got herself a PS3 instead. <br />
<br>''[Chris is STILL typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I heard that like- the PS triple eats up a lot of energy and like- has cau- has like- burned houses down. Cause it messes up the- no but the PS3 really- <br />
<br>''[More of Chris typing then audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So when's the next comic coming out Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I can't say. I don't have a date for it right now. I've been busy with the- with real life and such. You know getting the s- getting the website back up and all that. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh but I've been waiting so long. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I gotta tell you something Chris. ''[unclear]'' -to the trolls but I haven't done anythin' myself. It's run off into splinter groups doin' stuff to you. Ever since the Panda thing, I haven't done anything to you man. Everybody's been running round doing things. I have no control anymore. So I'm back here. This is why I'm back here. Do you understand? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. I hear you.<br />
<br />
===Nudes On YouTube===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I hear you got some uh- nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> What? <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hear you got some nudes on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Dudes?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Nudes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> That's what I thought- I have nothing na- I have nothing like that on the nu- on the YouTube. I've nothing like that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh someone posted the pics from the ED page. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> They're just tryin' ta get on- they're just tryin' ta get on my nerves again. But I'm not gonna let 'em.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Did you take those pictures or what? Where'd they come from?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Uh, are they Photoshopped?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah most of- Yes. Most of them are Photoshopped.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I can help you with ED. Chris I can help you with ED.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You can see the neck and the body doesn't quite match up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, Chris. Cassie's just arrived. She's just a little nervous about talking to you, but she's gonna talk to you soon. Is that OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I just got one quick comment. Look, the ED people were in contact with me, but I've lost contact with them. But I know you can delete that page permanently. I'm tryin' to help you man. You can get that page down forever. Even the entire site. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What, after you raped um- Sarah? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I'm trying to make amends. So let me do my business. All right?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's too late to make amends. Look what you did.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look what Chris has done. Look at what Chris has done, okay? ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um. Cogsdev said she had a look at the data, they have it up in Image editing software.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah. Well...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I don't know what to tell you there. <br />
<br>''[Several trolls speak at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Doesn't that mean they're real? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I don't think so. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You don't think so?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Well, did you take them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Then where did those pictures come from? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who took those?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I don't know. And I'd rather not talk about that anymore. It's making me feel uncomfortable.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Are you lying to your fans Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> We don't feel confort- we don't feel comfortable. We're big fans of your work and we don't like being lied to. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I'd like to make a point. It might just be a doppelganger [sic].<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, you know the thing I hate most is lies. I like to spread the truth about you Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You say you're honest, but you're lying to us.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[clearly annoyed]'' Fine, fine. Some those pictures are real. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Some of them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Some of them but not all of them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Like, which ones aren't real?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'd rather not go into detail because I'd rather not look at 'em. Cause uh- ''[interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' -are you ashamed of it?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Do you not like to look in the mirror?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You owe it- you owe it to your fans.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, but- yeah, but- yeah, but upon looking at those it's like ref- it's like reflecting a pe- uh p- a past moment in my life where I- I was played for the fool. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah, by the man in the pickle suit?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh that guy- I hate that guy.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah I saw- he was trolling some other people you know? So you're not alone, Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he took pictures of me like that too...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That guy's an asshole, I hate him.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhhh yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He took pictures of my wife too. Sick bastard. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> He's a peanut.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br>[another pause]<br />
<br />
===Chris Hates Harry===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I just uh- never was fond of it. Ever since it came out, I was never fond of it. ''[unclear as troll speaks over]'' -just like I hate Harry Potter because he's s- he's goin- he's uh- in compe- was in competition against the world of Pokemon. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Well that- that doesn't make sense. But they're two different medias. Pokemon-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah but- yeah but still he-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> -Harry Potter is a book.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah but he poses as competition against them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> That's not really competition. I mean- <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talks over Jack]'' Oh that reminds me about books- Vivi- Vivian wrote a book and sent it to you. You never read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes. I am afraid I- yeah, yeah- I'm uh- I've been uh- so I've been under uh- too much stress between internet and all that. I'll ge- I'll read it, I'll read it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's been waiting for your response for quite a long time.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I like the cover. (pause) Nice cover.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he is right about that. That is a nice cover. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah the book is pretty good- I read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Well I- I will definitely make it a point to uh- read it. Very soon. <br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Audible over the others]'' Did you ever read Twilight?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I've heard th- I've heard Twilight and I've seen the trailer but I haven't seen the movie, I'll wait for it to come out DVD or Blu-ray.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br />
===Random Access Humor Python Style===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh OK, I heard a lot of girls like Twilight. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I see. Hey Polly does your voice sound like that, 'cause it sounds like [[BlueSpike|a guy talking falsetto]]. I mean no personal offense. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> That's not very nice...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm sorry. Believe me I didn't mean any pe- anything personal it's just like, you know- hm- kind- just kinda takes me by surprise a bit, that's all.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I knew a girl like that in high school.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Sounding upset]'' I can't help it if I'm born like this.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I'm- I'm- I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah she's a girl. I saw her pics. She's a girl.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I'll s- I'll take his word for it. I'm sorry I cu- I accused you there.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um. OK. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You know, aut- I mean- let's- it's just uh- you know it's uh- you know it's uh a bit- just a spot of fun. [[Random-access_humor|Stupid humor]]. Monty Python's Flying Circus. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> We know you love that. There's just so many references to it in the comic. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah I d- after they put all of the entire series on PlayStation Network I downloaded the Hamlet episode- that was the one that had uh- Jimmy Hill parodying himself. It also had this funny bit where it was like, you know- ''[in a stupid voice]'' "...and now it's time for The Robinsons, an everyday story about blah-de-blah-de-blah-de-blah. Dum-de-dum-de-dum-de-duhhh-dum-de-dum"- and so on...<br />
<br>''[A troll begins to speak but is interrupted by a very high-pitched Chris]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> "Morning Mrs. Robinson- Morning Mrs. Robinson. Comin' out shoppin'? Oh- you've been shoppin', what did you buy? What's this?-" 'What did you buy this for?'[Trolls laugh over him]'' -It was a bargain!"<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I've heard you do that before. I don't know where. Anyway uh- uhm- Whatever happened to Jimmy Hill? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I haven't heard from him in a long time so just assuming uh- he gave up or uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I think he got a- I think he got a, uh- children's TV program in England.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well he ain't botherin' me, so I'm not worried about him anymore.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Ye- but he's stealing Sonichu. Bastardizing it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah he did but uh- he s- but haven't seen any updates on his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' -profile, he's still doing it.<br />
<br>''[Several trolls talk over each other about him having a TV show]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Fails At Spanish Pt. 2===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' <br />
<br>''[Troll says something more about the TV show, but it's muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wants to say hi. Just forgive her English because she can't speak very well, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> All right. Just sent her the email by the way, just now. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Hey, Chris. It's me, Cassie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi, Cassie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Fine, and you?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm feelin' OK. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Why haven't you emailed me? I was really about-was really worried about you. What's happened? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry. I be- I've bee- I've been busy with the Internet and the stress and all that. I sent ya an email just now go- it's got my Wii number in it so you can add me to your contacts. I've been talking to uh- I've been talking to Sarah lot- quite a bit lately. She's been helping me with uh- updating the Sonichu site, since I've uh- since I'm working on uh- it's re-uploading and such. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Kay, I believe you. I going to check ''[pronounced like 'sheg']'' it, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You're going to where?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[very quietly]'' Check it.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> To check it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> To "shag-it"? Is that the-<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Check the email. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[still doesn't understand]'' Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> I going to check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, check email. ''[Laughs]'' Yeah I'm sorry I tr- I tried to uh- understand but it just kind of messed up a little bit. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don- why don't you two speak in Spanish?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhh. I'm not exactly fluent. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ¿Sabes hablar español, Chris? (Do you know how to speak Spanish?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí, hablo español. (Yes, I speak Spanish)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Oh. ''[pause, one of the trolls says something to her]'' Oh, eso es muy sexy. (That is very sexy.)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Ohhhh. Te gusta. Te gusta muchísimo, (You like it. You like it a lot)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> La verdad, si. (To tell you the truth, yes)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Me amos mis amigas muchísimas. Sons muy bueñas! (I love my friends (feminine) a lot. They are very good.) [Correction: Amo a mis amigas muchísimo. Son muy buenas.] <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Oh, eso es tan cool en español! Muy bueno! (That's so cool in Spanish! Very good)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Muy bueño (very good)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Aha, exacto. (it is!)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]'' Okay, that's good. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Well, I going down, okay?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Okay, you're going down- by the way, let me ask ya Cassie, do you ever- you've uh- you've actually met uh Sarah May in person, haven't you? <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Not. She's on Internet.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Okay. That's cool- but anyway uh- you got- you d- you have my Wii number, uh- you can reply the email with your Wii number and it'll be registered on the Wii network. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[very haltingly]'' Yes. So. Cool. Talk with you Chris. You are so cool. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Heh. Uhhhh. You flatter me. Tú me flatteray. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[Weak laugh]'' Well, see you. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[In his 'baby voice']'' Adiós. ''[sigh]'' <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós, bebé.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós, chiquita bonita. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>[Pause as audio cuts out]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -it again. <br />
<br>[Another pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So anyway, Chris. I've been working on Rabbichoso for a day and uh- I was just wonderin' like, it's- it's supposed to compete with the Sonichu, you know? If you weren't aware of that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhhh. I grabbed onto d- grabbed onto g I- grabbed onto the... that gist. I'm aware- I'm aware of the gist of the theory. Uh. I'm aw- I'm aware that you're- that you're tryin' to compete. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know what competition does. It's drives uh- it drives consumer interest- Well that's why you know- It's great. You have to compete with high quality things. ''[muffled]''- that's why I'm trying to help. You know, compete. Just so you're aware of this, OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I see. -see. <br />
<br>[Pause]<br />
<br />
===Rabbichoso And Animu===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris we've been ge- been getting uh threatening images from the Pickle Man. Did you s- did you see the left? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I've not heard from the Pickle Man in lo- in a long time. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Apparently there are multiple ones because this one is, uh, not a darkie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh-huh. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> It's good that they're leaving you alone now. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Seems like they found more easier targets. Seeing as how you became [[Navy|saltier]].<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh. You know I originally got that line- quote from an e- ep- episode of ExCel Saga. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> From what?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> ExCel Saga.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Oh, ExCel Saga. Oh, yeah, that's a good anime.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> AIII I-Falazzo! (''He means [[ScotPalazzo|Il-Palazzo]]'')<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, have you ever seen two animes, ''[muffled]'' and Schooldays?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I have not seen either of those. I like Steel Angel Kurumi as well.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, how much Japanese do you know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only a little bit. I'm not totally fluent. I can say that with all honesty. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something unintelligible, not quite Japanese]''<!-- It sounds like he's saying "You say you can't- can you speak with me?" in CHINESE. --><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Huh?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Never mind, you won't understand it.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[unclear] Chris-Chan. Genki desu-ka?''<br />
<br />
===Chris Could Kill Clyde===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, I just wanted to say, uh, you're doing a good job, like, keeping calm even though Clyde is here. I mean u- I thought you'd be, like, more angry at him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm being calm with you guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> -I would have been choking him by now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I'd have kicked his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Preach to the choir. Pr- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I'd make him choke on a pickle if it were up to me.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You guys can't touch me otherwise I'd kick all your asses. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, bring it.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris could kick Clyde's ass anytime.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Let's see Chris do it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Bring it to me any day of the week and I'll definitely show him a hard- day's night. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah I think you could kick his ass.<br />
<br>[Trolls and Clyde talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Sings]'' -been a hard day's night...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -never mind, just...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean that as a- meant that as in I would beat... him up. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Kick his ass?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm very strong. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. I'm gonna see you later, OK?<br />
<br>''[Unison of goodbyes]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> OK see ya. Thank you so much Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[ignoring his fans]'' Yeah I can- I can lift about my weight. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Like um- if Clyde were right in front of you, what would you do to him?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Like, what kind of style of fighting do you have?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, shut up.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I gotta know my competition. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Personal- in the physical offense. ''[sigh]'' I would definitely be giving you so much physical pain. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's not a s- that's not a style. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I would beat you up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He deserves it man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, that's still not a style...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He uses fisticuffs. He's a gentleman. Gentleman fisticuffs. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Whatever, I'll just see-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Stop arguing and just-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ''[Over previous troll]'' I mean, if he did that to my sweetheart I'd fucking kill him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well. He's not- he's not going to come over and kill me, I know that. He doesn't have the money. [pause] You know I'm surprised that you're mad here. You're much kinder in person I thought you- Now I'm just expecting you at my door anytime, just waiting for you to stand here with an axe or something. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Knives are too messy. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Ah, now a sword- sword's are usually better.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What about poison?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Poison's good, poison's good.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde, what- do you want him to beat your ass?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I was just expecting it, you know.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, you know what's another thing? I would definitely not tell you how I would be hurting you, but I would definitely give you a who- big amount of pain. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, he's gonna keep you guessin'!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he deserves it. After everything he's done-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Muffled by troll]'' -going to kill me, I'd like to know. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I'm just going to let you cover in- worry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh so you're never going to show up, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Oh yes I will show up. But you just won't be expecting it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't even know where I live, do you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Find out!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Maybe I should give you my address. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, you should track him down and kick his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> But I'm going to leave you guessing too...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Defend Panda's h- Panda's honor.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, hi Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> 'sup Julie.<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br>''[Everyone talks over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde's A Dick===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I notice her mic doesn't work. But still I'm just letting her know that- acknowledge her presence. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're doing well staying calm even though Clyde's here.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, Clyde's a total dick.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Fucker.<br />
<br>''[Rustling]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I mean, he's taken over everything. The IRC. This. I can't- no one can stop him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' -over there, so...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll:'''</font> I- I like Rabbichoso.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Of course you do. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll''':</font> It's funny. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I will not offer any new comment on it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, OK. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, when can we expect the next Sonichu to be released.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, we've been eager.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It'll be soon. It will be soon.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah just ignore Clyde man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean if you're going to put a hard date on it, you'd better deliver your promise. If you don't, I'll strike harder. That's all I'm saying.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. You're saying if I don't set a date, you're gonna...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no. I'm saying don't make promises you can't keep. Don't make promises you can't keep.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He'll choke you with his medallion bitch!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who the hell do you think you are?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I agree with Cogs over there. Maybe you should do just a page a day, not release all at once. Keep his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you telling him this when he hates you?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm giving him suggestions man, OK? OK?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Only thing he's gonna suggest to you is 'shut the fuck up'!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, seriously man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It's alright. <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Penny Arcade's slow.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh you mean like Penny Arcade or 8-Bit Theater or MegaTokyo?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah like they're just boring. Then they became kind of sellouts.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Country Cookin===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Chris, where's your favorite place to eat?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. Can't really say uh- but I like country cookin'. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> What's country cooking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh no G's in the sto- no G's in the name by the way, no G. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah what's country cooking? I'm not familiar with that.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's like uh- som- something like Golden Corral. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But Golden Corral is a national franchise.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh Chris, how are your parents?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> They're OK.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br>[Long pause]<br />
<br />
===Sex Is Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I've got a sug- another suggestion. Now be quiet all of you cause I know you hate me. Just- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, Chris hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well don't defend him. He can defend himself OK? He's a man. But whatever-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let him speak.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm suggesting that- you go on and on about this sex stuff but you've never gotten laid, have you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I like to put myself in the imaginative situation that I'd like to be in and the sexual stimulation. So I can be ready for [[ego|myself]] for when I do actually have my first time.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well my first time was- I'll just say that it's terrible, OK? I didn't know what I was doing, she didn't know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let me guess, you prematurely ejaculated?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no, it's not like that you don't know what to do. Every woman's told me OK? You can't prepare-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Clyde]'' First time's always awkward...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -I learnt that mistake a while back, OK whatever. OK, you just- you can't prepare for your first time. You might as well just have a really bad first time so you learn from your mistakes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm not trying to defend Clyde or anything, but yeah it's kinda true. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Hmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The girl I first fell in love with is the girl I'm married to right now. Samantha just changed my world. But marriage does get boring.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Tips To STAY STRAIGHT===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I know how you say how important it is to stay straight, um- I'm having trouble staying straight, do you have any suggestions?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Watch a bunch of pornography with uh- with naked women. OK, a lot of naked women.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That happened to me one time...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, I have this friend I play video games with, is that gay? He's male by the way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry could you- I'm sorry could you repeat that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I have this guy I'm friends with he always comes over to my house to play video games. Is that gay? I'm kinda scared. You know? I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Hmm. Is he making any advances towards you? Personally. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I dunno how to tell. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Like uh sit- does he always sit next to you when he's playing games. Playing video games.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Yeah he usually does. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I see. Hmm. My- well- my suggestion in that case, would be to keep a heavy distance between you and that guy. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he meant anything gay by it though. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he means anything like- gay about it. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well, still- it's always best to find out- you can ask him. Don't be afraid to ask him. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> What would you do in this situation?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well if he said yes then I would uh- basically- let me think about that a moment. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you have any friends who're are like, guys?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only acquaintances and only a few of them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you play video games with people or anything? Do they come over to your house?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. No.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I remember-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> ''[Cuts Polly off]'' I'm just worried I might be gay or something. I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You probably are Falsion, but that's OK. No, look dude. It's okay to be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Leave him alone! Leave him alone! He's straight!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Why?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Hey, let's have a calm conversation here. Let's not have any fights.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br>''[Trolls speak over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I've been reading the Sonichu comics and man, they are page-turners! Seri- I was on- I was on the edge of my seat for a while. I ju- I couldn't- I couldn't- you know. Just had to read and read.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Thank you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, can I be your friend? I know I'm a guy. I don't mean anything gay by it. Can I be your friend? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. I dunno.<br />
<br />
===A Wild Snorlax Appears===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Do you want any hotdogs?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No thanks, I'm OK. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> No?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I was talking with my mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I was wondering if I could be your friend.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I h- heard you only like, you only like to be acquaintances. With guys. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, ummm. Yeah. Let's just pretty much leave it at acquaintance. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hello Mrs. Chandler. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> She can't hear you, I'm wearing my earphones.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Listen, I'm not gay. I don't- you know- yeah. Never mind.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I mean- I mea- I-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What do you have against gay people? I'm serious to hear this. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's just unnatural and it's against God's will. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, it's not like it's a choice. You can't change who you are like- you're a creative guy but I mean they're just gay. They can't change that. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm just answering a few questions mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You don't have to answer. Nobody's payin' you to do that.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yes they are.<br />
<br>''[shuffling sounds, clanging]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> It ain't none of their business no-way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I wouldn't be asked questions like that by employers or anybody. Don't tell people what you d- what you think. Keep that to yourself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris what's hap- what's happening?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, obviously, my mother is offering her input.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Tell her you're just talking to some friends. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' I don't need no back talk from somebody on the other end of the phone.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear you, Mom. Hmm. Hmm. <br />
<br>''[scraping sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> These- these idiots don't have any brains or- they don't have any idea this way or that.<br />
<br>''[more banging, clanging and tumbling sounds. Sounds like washing up]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Is right now a bad time right now? I mean-<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Pixelblocks, Pixelblocks!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Someone's saying "Pixelblocks." <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you saying [[Pixelblocks]]?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>''[Chris's mom has been singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful singing voice, Chris.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[Audio cuts back in]'' -all the anxiety, causing you stress.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, well sometimes they don't; they can be peaceful.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Well, your mom and dad get the crappy end of the stick.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm, a lot of us do.<br />
<br>''[more clattering sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Yeah, just like this nasty mess over here that you guys left that I got to clean up.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm. ''[Audio cuts]'' -Yeah, I took care of my bills. I mean, not completely, but I took care of them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> What about going to, uh, Redmond?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> We! (Wii?) <br />
<br>[unintelligible, windows beeps]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[laughing]'' Yeah, sweetheart pool.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Mmhmm. ''[laughing]'' Like the other side of the pillow.<br />
<br>''[someone sighing. Clanging noises return after short absence]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' ...is all, I mean, living with your parents is okay bad-in today's bad economy, but at 26, come on. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Shut up, you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I'm being nice.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde isn't so bad a guy. He does bad things, but he's pretty cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah he's reformed. He's seen the error- Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How- how could he do that to Sarah? I mean- That's not right.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah. Well, that's like Luke... That's like Luke and Laura from General Hospital. I know that's like, before y'all's time, but, um... Luke was a rapist and she-he raped Laura and then, like, a few months later they get married. So... ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, I believe Clyde was trying to make amends from his past actions.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, but Chris, can you uh- can you forgive him?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Random Troll:'''</font> ''[whispering]'' White whale, holy grail! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Can you forgive a small-dicked Asian? Just a thought.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He's not Asian! <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm half-Asian, okay? My parents ''[unclear]'' I don't really wanna go into it. It's too bo-boring for you people. But this is why I ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you there? Just makin' sure, buddy.<br />
<br>''[clattering]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Move out.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Another Troll''':</font> Well, how do I do that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi there, my kitty. ''[In baby voice]'' Yes, there's a pretty kitty.<br />
<br>''[Someone speaking with a voice-synth]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hang on a second. I've got, like, a thousand different... Oh, Crass, why'd you do that?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Because. You can unban him but, yeah. I'm not gonna friggin' stand for that. <br />
<br>''[Sound of a vacuum cleaner]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> I (m j d?) do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I heard the "g" word.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um, is that a vacuum cleaner?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Yeah, sounds like it is.<br />
<br>[Trolls speak but are drowned out by vacuum]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ...room or something.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I think the vacuum cleaner... <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If that's the government trying to do some kind of thing, then my name's Rusty Shackleford.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's a loud fan.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I have a fan above my stove, too.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Hey... I do, too.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Wait- wha- wait. You-you-you're in the kitchen? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Me too.<br />
<br>''[possibly Sonic game sound effects]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmhm? Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I'm pretty sure it's already asked, but I didn't catch the answer. When can we expect the next Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I-I-I told you my suggestion of releasing a page a day or something. I mean, it's a pretty good one. It-it-it allows for a good time. Finish a page a day. You upload it. You know? It's very good. Works very well.<br />
<br>''[Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh. I mean- you guys keep asking when he's going to finish it but I wonder how many pages are going to be in the new one? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> The last one was like, thirty. Just release it over the span of a month. Works fine. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...go up to ninety thousand...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[mutters something]''<br />
<br>''[Sound of Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Down by the river...side.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful voice, Chris.<br />
<br>''[clattering, typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[unclear, repeating the same two phrases]'' Gone down by the river, down by the water side, down by the riverside. Down by the waterside. Down by the riverside.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember ''[unclear]''<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -I'm hungry myself.<br />
<br>''[some kind of alarm sounding]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Then go eat.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I already ate.<br />
<br />
===Anime And Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I wonder what anime Chris watches nowadays. There's not many on television but do you still watch Japanese cartoons? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[In a bad accent]'' Kawaii desu ne. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I want to watch Shuffle. He said it was very good. He said it was sad. I don't know if I wanna watch- I don't like sad stuff. I like to be happy when I watch anime.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, and um, do you watch stuff like Bleach and um Code Geass or Naruto or something?<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I'm glad to hear that Shuffle isn't sad. I'm definitely going to watch it sometime.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um, yeah Chris that was a good call on Naruto. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah there's a lot of people who don't like it much either. Too popular.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But please. Please. Hope. ''[audio cuts out briefly]'' Uh, Chris, please consider When They Cry.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Ooh, I saw that one. It was a really good series.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, I know; that was good, like- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah. Both seasons of it. <br />
<br>''[Windows beeps, voices overlapping]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I could link you to Season One if you want. Yeah, Samantha got me into that. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...you'll give it a try, Chris. It's a very, very good series.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Hm. Hey, Julie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...lots of ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Watch Shuffle. You got the six episodes of Shuffle or... Which o- which anime? I'm sorry. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh and JoJo's Bizarre Adventure is also cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I really liked JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. Very ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Za warudo!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah, I think Shuffle is quite all right. I like Heidi. She's sweet and loyal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> That's a good one. One of my favorites is Black Lagoon.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris have you ever seen La Blue Girl?<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other about different anime]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, uh, Chris can I, my, uh, I don't know if it's all right, but, like, could you like, give me an email sometime? I could, uh... recommend you to... this anime that... Polly and... Julie like to watch. They're quite- they... Oh, C-and Cogs has recommended such great anime. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[talking to his mother]'' Yeah? That's ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> As well as Julie-Julie's the person that got me into anime.<br />
<br />
===People Love Poketunes===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> -we can go into this later cause I got my headphones on. And, Mom, you know what something else? They liked your singing.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> What? I don't sing.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> That's my laugh; that's my laugh. They couldn't hear me. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They heard you. Singin'. Just now.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I can't sing!<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I'm tone deaf. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They just heard you singing, and liked your voice.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay. Did you write checks for all those bills and pack everything ''[unclear]''?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yes, Mother, I did.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You're not telling me no story?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm not telling you no story.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> OK. It's important [''inaudible''] did you pay them?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, I paid that one. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay, you have to be honest with me, 'cause, see, you're settin'...<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm being honest, I'm being honest.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> How you respond to what [we] talk about. You say you ought to something and you don't do it then that's gonna change my ideas ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay... I'll be sure to pay the remaining differences next month. Alright?<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> No, pay this month.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I know but I couldn't pay them all with 90 dollars so there's still some left ''[sound cuts]'' ...oh, you're cooking them up here, okay, that's why you turned the fan on over the stove.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br>''[Trolls rejoice and mock Momma Chandler]''<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 1|Mumble Chat 1]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 3|Mumble Chat 3]]|}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Spanish]]<br />
==Links==<br />
*[https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBOVVDS0JtSDNvMWs Download]<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_2&diff=163023Mumble 22012-09-26T23:33:06Z<p>Irisviel: /* A Wild Snorlax Appears */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{Articleofthenow}}<br />
[[Image:0839-MomDesi.JPG|thumb|right|180px|In Mumble 2, a Wild [[Barbara Chandler|Snorlax]] appeared.]]<br />
<br />
'''Mumble 2''' is the second [[Mumble]] chat that took place on 4 [[February 2009]]. More than an hour long.<br />
<br />
This is a more organized Q&A type chat than [[Mumble 1]]. Questions from [[Clyde]] about [[sex]] in the [[comic]] and interesting tidbits about how Chris believes sex is the same as romance. This is pretty hard hitting, with stuff like how Chris is into [[McDonald's|fast food]] yet he's against tobacco. A lot of drama involving Clyde.<br />
<br />
Length: '''1:49:17'''<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
<br />
===Notes===<br />
* Chris doesn't like Clyde because he stole his sweetheart.<br />
* Audio cuts out for a minute before Chris says: "...HYMEN!" (You broke her hymen)<br />
* Trolls claim [[Panda]] is with Clyde, Chris wants to hear her voice, they say she's busy<br />
* 'She and I WERE very close'<br />
* Chris didn't have $400-$800 to go and see Panda; claims he got this number from an airport website recommended by [[Miyamoto]]<br />
* Insists on [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] being in ''[[Animal Crossing]]''<br />
* Doesn't want to talk about his deal with them<br />
* Insists that he doesn't have to turn down his radio since his voice is louder (''it is horribly loud in the mic'')<br />
* Panda gave Clyde all of the sites, etc.<br />
* [[Sarah]] is going to be with Clyde, which Chris wants to deny<br />
* These motherfuckers keep talking over each other<br />
* Calls a troll's critique crap<br />
* [[Bubbles]] must be aroused, she isn't wet all the time<br />
* Bubbles is 90% water so does sperm just swim around forever? NO<br />
* Clyde: This is a children's comic, why so much sex?<br />
: '''Chris:''' It is romance. My best artwork is when they're making out 'romantic moments', drawn in protest to trolls. Shows that [[Rosechu]]s have vaginas, not [[duck]]s.<br />
* Admits to maybe going overboard<br />
* Trolls try to reason with him about the [[ED]] article: There wouldn't be an article if he didn't react like he does.<br />
* Trolls say that TV-Y7 means NO SEX but Chris points to romantic anime that have making out (cartoons are for kids, whatever the content).<br />
* Trolls talk about Japan being less strict about those things<br />
* Everyone gets to vote in [[CWCville]], even if they're [[Niggos|black]].<br />
* Got his idea from [[Mary Poppins]].<br />
* Troll tries to give historical background about cough medicine putting kids to sleep. Chris insists it was the lullaby that put them to sleep.<br />
* Discussion about Chris, 'gay message' sent by a troll<br />
* He calls Clyde a scoundrel<br />
* BELIEVE HIM HE IS STRAIGHT<br />
* Chris tries to speak Mexican at 20:50<br />
* Mexican speaks Mexican to him... he replies in Menglish<br />
* [[4-cent_garbage]] is located in Mexico<br />
* Someone says that he needs to improve his Mexican<br />
* Chris is against smoking, CWCville is smoke and alcohol free<br />
* Rehash of why [[tobacky]] is bad, his position on it, alcohol=bar fights<br />
* Chris's dad smoked and had several bypasses, has a pacemaker and has had heart attacks<br />
* Mention of his hair cuttings for his fans<br />
* Chris was doing math in his head, got in car crash.<br />
* Chris has taken college level math. Took trigonometry.<br />
* Trolls gang up on Clyde for stealing Panda<br />
* Time will tell when Chris will make the money he would have in the Nintendo deal<br />
* Trolls bash Clyde for his pot smoking <br />
* Chris doesn't watch news because it's bad news =(<br />
* Bashing of the Mexican<br />
* Chris can type 30 to 100 WPM, but can't type and talk at the same time<br />
* Chris says [[PSN]] is free though Clyde(?) points to the $1,000 Chris spent on PSN<br />
* Chris has been typing for 15 minutes now and it is VERY loud<br />
* Chris has been busy IRL therefore the comic release doesn't have a date<br />
* Someone points to nudes on [[YouTube]].<br />
* He does not have it on the YouTube, but he isn't going to take it anymore.<br />
* Claims some of the photos are photoshopped.<br />
* Clyde offers help to take ED page down.<br />
* Chris denies taking those pictures, doesn't want to talk about it, making him uncomfortable.<br />
* Some of the pictures are real. When questioned which ones are fake, Chris can't answer.<br />
* Chris hates Harry Potter because it was in competition with [[Pokémon]]!<br />
* Chris is too stressed to read Vivian's [[A Girl Who Brought Down the World|book]], but he likes the cover!<br />
* Polly, who has been talking the whole time is confronted by Chris who thinks she is a guy. Polly is upset. Chris apologizes.<br />
* [[Jimmy Hill]] has launched his Sonichu show<br />
* More Mexican talk at 55:10<br />
* Chris giggles and sighs happily when Cassie, another Mexican, compliments him and when she leaves he says 'Chiquita Bonita'<br />
* Rabbichoso talk (Sonichu.info)<br />
* Classic trolls are leaving Chris alone.<br />
* Chris likes Steel Angel Kurumi (''quote from [[Wikipedia:Steel Angel Kurumi|Wikipedia]]: often classified as ecchi due to the focus on fanservice and panty shots'')<br />
* Chris claims to be very strong, could beat Clyde up. Says he would show Clyde a [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force|Hard Day's Night]], and would give Clyde pain.<br />
* ShinyMarshtomp makes an appearance? Likes Rabbichoso<br />
* Chris likes to eat at [[Country Cookin]] (''like Golden Corral'')<br />
* Chris likes to imagine his first time. <br />
* Clyde says the first time is awful, Chris said it was because Clyde prematurely ejaculated<br />
* Watch porn with naked women to cure your gay<br />
* Guys sitting next to you = gay coming on to you<br />
* Falsion has been in the chat room and is afraid he is gay<br />
* A wild Snorlax appears<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
<br />
===Waiting for Chris===<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I can't wait to hear Chris! I'm a huge fan!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, goddamn these noodles are fantastic. Man, I wish I could eat like this everyday.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Have you eaten the rice balls?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no. These are noodles. These are-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Fan-fucking-tastic.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now they're all gone, it's fantastic, you know?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Sweetangie is Chris. Or, we think so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's definitely not the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm disappointed there's so many impostors out there. Kinda my fault, but, you know, if it weren't- ''[unintelligible]'' -hard to come by.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His mic was working last time he was here, just fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He usually capitalizes his words, like in every sentence.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is- I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Is it set to push to talk or something?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You better get us your email address Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah its push to talk. It's called push to talk. It's fantastic ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, just have him set it to voice activity. It works so much better that way.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Aww, he left.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> You guys are fucking idiots.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other again]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You guys scared him off by being guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, you fucking jackasses. Nice going.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Was that even the real...?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yes, that was the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He's too much of a pussy to talk.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, cause you scared him, or some- No, or he's too stupid to be.<br />
<br>''[Trolls Laugh]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Arrives===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Chris arrives, with radio playing loudly]'' Hello.<br />
<br>''[Trolls all greet him]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, now-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Why haven't you got your microphone working?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't know why my microphone [is] messed up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry, but we had an impostor here before.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm registered. I've got myself registered now. So, uh, hopefully-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> That's probably why. It had to like, uh- calibrate.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Well, I'm calibrated now.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So, Chris, have you seen Rabbichoso, it's fantastic.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't give a crap about your stupid pencil sketch.<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am not listening. I do not have to listen to ''you''.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Why, I'm not understanding [inaudible]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well for one thing,and I'll say it on here, you stole my sweetheart!<br />
<br>''[Cutout continues]''<br />
<br />
===PandaHalo, Trip to Redmond and Animal Crossing===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You broke her hymen!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I know it's a terrible mistake, but I plan to make it up to her. I'm getting married and uh- I'm doing the things I should do.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh and another thing, if she is really over there with you now, then put her on the mic. Please.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> She's not- He never said-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, Chris, she's very busy, OK. She's very busy.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's not over here right now. Okay? So lets drop it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, fine. Well could you tell her to please send me a message lettin' me know, for sure, so I can know- so I can know to-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' I'll let her know whatever you want, but it's her life. She doesn't have to send you a message. You failed her. You failed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' She and I were very close.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If you we're so close, then why didn't you go?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' Because I had- Aw, hang on a second. How do I- oh, that's right. This thing. Right. Mmm. Hold on a sec. Oh yeah, because I did not have four to eight hundred dollars!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It doesn't cost that much to go cross-country man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes it does. I know, I saw it on an airport website. Where I was be- Where I was- recommended to me by Mr. Miyamoto.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, you can drive there. It's not that hard.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened with that? I thought, um, didn't you have a deal with them or something? I heard a rumor that your characters were going to be in Animal Crossing.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, they are in Animal Crossing. And I did- and I do- I did have a deal with them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened though?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' I'd rather not say.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Radio, Clyde and Criticism===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, why don't you turn down the TV? It's hard to hear you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Annoyed sigh]'' I do not have a TV turned on in here.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I can hear it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have a radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I hear something in the background.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Burping throughout sentence]'' Well that's the- that would b- the radio. And it is not that loud.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But it shows up pretty well on your microphone mic. With due respect.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But still, my voice is louder than the radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Ah goo- ahh given.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh, Chris? Uh, when are you going to do the new Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something over Polly]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' Uh, I'll answer Polly's question. I'm not sure. It's, uh, it's in progress right now, I'm drawing it up.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I can't wait to read it!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Well, we'll see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Listen, Clyde kind of has admin on here, so we can't really do anything about him. So, yeah. I don't know.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Hard to hear over Chris's radio]'' ...with you guys. I love you guys. Just as much as Chris loves you guys. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I was angry. I was angry. But I'm calm now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't try to hurt any other person from now on.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm doing the best I can. I'm doing the best I can.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have much- I do not have much to say in response to that right now. Because I'm ticked off.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't let him get to you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're no better than he is, if you give in.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris, I just wanted to let you know I'm a huge fan of the comics, and I'm glad you keep doing what you're doing. You're doing a great job, and just keep it up, alright man?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, yeah, I appreciate the, uh, what's the word I'm looking for? The, the, uh- well, the encouraging words. Encouragement. I appreciate the encouragement. Well, there are things, uh- I- er- current events I do not appreciate. I appreciate the positive encouragement.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I can't really do anything. He took over the IRC channel. I used to be the owner. I mean Clyde. He's like taking over everything.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, it was because Panda gave it to me, you know. But anyway, I mean, you can't just listen to encouragement, you've got to listen to criticism, man. Criticisms are what make you better, you learn from your mistakes. You learn from mistakes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Be right back guys, my wife is calling.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I don't- I don't- Tons of people don't like the Rabbichoso art style, but you know, I gotta improve on that. That's something I plan to improve on. There's a lot of criticism in the death of Sonichu, right? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What? What did you just say?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a lot of criticism of Sonichu. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. For a moment there I thought you said something different.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What, what did you think I said? I'm just saying, there are people who like it and people who don't like it. You gotta start taking in those suggestions. You know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. So many things that will be improved upon. But, I just have to hear from Sarah herself that she really is going to be with you, Clyde. I have to hear it from herself. It's one thing to hear it from you and then it's- then on that note, it's just I find it very hard to believe. So I have to hear it from her.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I kinda think that Rabbichoso sucks. I mean, I think it could be funny, but it honestly looks like it's drawn by a kindergartner.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, Sonichu has evolved over the years. You can see that the art's getting better. Rabbichoso doesn't even look like something a beginner would do, honestly. I mean, ''[Interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A whole bunch of crap!<br />
<br>''[Everyone starts talking at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, Sonichu is in color.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I know, I accept his criticism. But you just called it crap! Now that's just rude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have emotions going behind me- uh, behind that opinion.<br />
<br />
===Cassie===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, did you get my message.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Aren't you going to be the gentleman, then? Aren't you gonna be the gentleman?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I just want to ask you, Chris. I'm Cassie's friend. She- she's worried sick about you. Why haven't you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did email her! As a- I- I haven't gotten any re-plies from her. I have emailed her and I have instant messaged her on A.I.M. and Skype. I haven't heard back from her. I don't know what's going on there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> ...you emailed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> When was the last time you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, hang on, I'll check.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris? I have a question. My fa- One of my favorite new characters is, um, Simonla, and like, I also like Zapina as well. Um, are they gonna have bigger parts in the series later on?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, could you repeat that question?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I was wondering if Simonla and Zapina will either have bigger parts in the series later on. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [[Sonichu_10#The_Final_Countdown|Possibly]]. Possibly, but, uh, I can't say for sure. Oh, and, uh, to answer your question, uh- in answer to, uh, I believe, uh, Screwhead, who asked? It was about four days ago. About four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Yeah. Four days ago? Okay, I'll tell her to check it out.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> The last email I sent was about four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> She'll contact you in a while, though.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I'll tell her to check it out and- and thanks Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright. Mm.<br />
<br />
===Bubbles's Pussy and Sex in the Comics===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris? I have a question.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, my favorite character is Bubbles, I kinda liked the, uh, the thing she had going with Blake, where she was kind of keeping the relationship secret. I thought that was kinda clever. I was wondering, uh, she's a water-type, so does that mean that her vagina is always wet, or does she have to be aroused like a normal woman?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, aroused. That's applied for all the, uh, Rosechus there. And also, like, you know, she's not just a water-type, she's also- she's a water- and electric-type, like uh- oh, shoot- What's the name of that one? Originated from Gold-Silver-Crystal series, uh, evolves from Chinchou? Lanturn. And she has, uh, she has Volt Absorb ability.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, Chris, another question following Bubbles. Uh, her body is 90% water, and now this thing about the whole sexual intercourse- about it. Now, don't take this rude, and you don't need to answer me... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...I totally respect your creative work. My wife actually got me into this, uh, show actually. So, what happens is- like, as you know, like, semens are like little fishes in themselves. Would that mean, I mean, would they actually have a route to fly into the egg, in theory, or do they just swim around her whole body, just forever just swimming around.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. The, uh, the internal or- the internal organs uh, for the Rosechus are pretty much the same thing, so I'd say pre- about, uh, as good chance as most any other mammal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, so you mean she's able to control her density a little bit more. She- I understand now. She's able to control more her density from the 90% water. Okay. That pretty much answers it just perfectly. That's been bothering me at work. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I got another question, Chris, about this whole sexual thing. I mean, this is a children's comic, right? Why is there so much sex in it?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. It's called romance, and my- and my- if you'll notice throughout the comics my best pieces of artwork among which were those where dey were kissing and making out. Romantic moments.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a hidden page-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' And because- and because- and because of the tension from, uh, the trolls and Encyclopedia Dramatica, I just felt like doing that in protest against them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, but childre-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' Yes but how is that really a protest? That, you know, you know, are, are you like referencing to the 60's when women burned their bras? That was in protes- That was feminism. Saying that they weren't slaves to men. Do you even understand the whole thing?<br />
<br>''[Multiple voices are heard at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Now, to tell you the truth, I never really thought about, I never really thought about that when I-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Chris]'' Then how is, stripping was, how was that protest-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Jack]'' It shows that they have vaginas and NOT dicks. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well you know the dick thing was the fact that they were just, you know, mocking you. I think you went overboard with that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well maybe I did. Maybe I did. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, you did, because that seems kind of excessive, kind of-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' I don't think they would have even bothered to write about an article about you if you didn't just keep reacting like that.<br />
<br />
===Chris justifies sex in a kids' comic===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I have another question.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The point some of us are trying to make is, if it's TV-Y7 that means there should really be no sex in it at all.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible over other people]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's pretty much incorrect, I mean, uh, there's so many romantic anime that's TV-Y7, and they shoul- they have making out.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, a lot of things in Japan, Japan has stricter standards-not stricter, I mean looser guidelines than America. It's much different.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear ya.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I was just wondering what Bubbles, um, she has a, that water whirlwind attack, I was just curious if you had any plans to make- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Butting in]'' By the way, that was a Whirl- Whirlpool.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font>Yeah, Whirlpool, sorry, sorry, Whirlpool, but do you have any plans to mix an, uh, Electric-type attack with that, since water conducts electricity, right? It could be a very powerful-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah, she did, she did an electric attack amongst the- the walls of that Whirlpool and she let out. In case you didn't know, there's a- little bits of lightning bolts among which-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, oh, I'm sor- I didn't notice that, I'm sorry, I'll go take another look. Thank you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hey Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> You make some pretty sweet Little Big Planet levels.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you.<br />
<br />
===Chris on Benadryl babysitting===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, there's a message from Cogs on the side, it's about, uh, do women not have the right to vote already in CWCville.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, evry- Everybody, no matter what age, no matter what gender or race, everybody has the right to vote in CWCville. Even if they're black.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Then what's up with the "Votes for Women" thing, I was-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Not just vote women, but- ''[interrupted]'' any other ethnicities, and gays?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't understand-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did that- heard it in Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What? Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, man, Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, yeah, that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's a classic. It's my favorite movie of all time.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that movie was, like, based in the 1900s.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but still I- still I agreed with that message there-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Taken out of context, that makes it seem like CWCville's set in the 1960s.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What message? That children should be given cough medicine so they'll go to sleep?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''What?''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that's what women used to do back in- That's what mothers, friggin' nurses and stuff used to do to kids in the 1900s, is give children, like, you know, cough medicine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Cause- cause the medicine- uh, correction, the medicine did not put them to sleep, there was a lullaby, not the cough medicine. They only had to take the cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ...because it rained, before dere, and it was not, and it was to, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Rain means cough medicine doesn't have anything to do with each other. That's not how friggin' germs are spread, or colds are gotten. Colds are gotten through germs, not the rain.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How is cough medicine any different from today's parents that just let their kids watch TV until they fall asleep? I mean, it's just as bad.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well- Cough medicine has a lot to do with the psychological effects of it. Obviously if you get- if you keep giving fre-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Thanks, Samantha, that was delicious.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's my, uh, Samantha-<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, that's we're all saying, cause I've heard that there's a lot of different chemicals in cough medicine. You could pick up a ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I don't even take cough medicine, because I'm not a pussy.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Anyway, I never put any references, I never did any references or plan any references to cough medicine or anything of that sort.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Well, Chris, Cassie says the last e-mail she got from you was on the 17th. How 'bout your being gay? Is that true?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[sigh]'' That wa- That was somebody had- That was Clyde hacking through my e-mail and spammed that to my contacts.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, I definitely did not do that-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You're a scoundrel-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -a slanderous lie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I did not do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Whoa-whoa-whoa. Wow. Well, thanks for that. She was worried that you were- that you don't like her.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> You're a scoundrel, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't do that. That was someone else.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I was wondering, because I've heard other news too, I was really hoping that you weren't gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Believe me, I'm straight.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I'll take your word for it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you. And, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Cogs- Cogs got a way- she showed us that, okay? I mean, you only ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br />
===Chris's fail-riffic Spanish===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So, Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, Screwhead's from Mexico. I heard you like Spanish, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hola, Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You know Spanish, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí. Conoso Mexico. Tomé dos años ''[unclear]'' mi escuela secundaria. (Yes, I know Mexico. I took two years [in, possibly] my secondary school.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has venido en Mexico? (Have you come to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, lo siento? (Uh, I'm sorry?)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has estado en Mexico? (Have you been to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Estoy Mexico? No. (I am Mexico? No.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[slowly]'' Has estado, um, in Mexico. Has venir? (Have you been to Mexico? Have gone?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Uh, no, I hav- no, no tengo pansars. ''[sic]'' (no, I don't have pansars (?))<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I think, uh, I think I meant to say- I'm pretty sure-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Did you just say you don't wear pants?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, no, I was trying to say, ah, I don't have plans to go in Mexico at the moment.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's what I understood what he was saying there.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, did you know that, that 4-cent garbage website is located in Mexico?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> That's why-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, that's why they can't get it shut down.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]'' borders, plus it's cheaper to run sites over there; they have, like, several servers.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wanted to talk to you, but she couldn't make it here, well, and, she wants to be your Spanish teacher, because she says that you've got room to improve your Spanish.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Oh, that Cassie. Yeah, I'm sorry, I thought you were- I got mixed up. Um... Yeah, um, I'm sorry, I, uh, I haven't talked to that- I haven't talked to Cassie in a while, but I've been mostly talking to, uh, her gal- her, uh, gal-pal and I'm sure- I'm sure she'd tell you a lot about her...<br />
<br />
===In which the trolls discuss bar fights===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey Chris, how- how does Sonichu keep Rosechu from spending more than a hundred dollars at the mall? I've always wondered how he could manage to do that. I've always had problems with that myself.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That wa- That time at the mall, it was, uh, Kel loaned the credit card. And it's like, yeah- she gave- she gave Sonichu the responsibility of that credit card. She did.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I've always given my advice on cannabis, you should do the ''[unintelligible]'', Cogs Chris, but I think she wants your response.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, one of my friends sent me this picture, and I think you might find it kinda disturbing just because they say it's proof that you're gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Aw yeah, I saw that, that's just a crappy Photoshop.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No, that one doesn't- this one doesn't look Photoshopped at all.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'm not gonna look at it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Oh, you're not? Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, uh, you say you're against smoking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. As a matter of fact, CWCville is a smoke-free, non-alcoholic city.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[partially drowned out]'' That's what we call a totalitarian state...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, and, uh, in the pilot episode with Seth MacFarlane, of, you know, Family Guy? He's always smoking. What do you think about that?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Go smoke.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I just- I just take that with a grain of salt, and, uh, you know, that's what-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, if he can smoke, why can't anyone else? I mean, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Because it causes cancer!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> So does a lot of things.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> It could be a prop pipe.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> In any case, I'm not- in any, in any case I've never done it and I never will.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, but eating too much fast food can give you a heart attack. I mean... so many things are deadly for you.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What about fast food, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> My father used to smoke and he went through a whole bunch of heart attacks. He suffered three- <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Well, I think that might have to do more with his weight.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He suffered through three or four triple bypasses.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I think that's... that's more like a weight issue.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He has a pacemaker!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, eh...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey ya guys, leave him alone. Ya know, my granddad, he smoked most of his life. He quit for 25 years and still died of lung cancer. I mean that's just the way it is. And your body never gets rid of it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, what about ''[pause]'' Chris, what about fast food? That's- that's bad for you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey Chris. Chris, could you do me a favor and send an email to Cassie? She's very worried about you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Yeah sure, I'll send her an email later.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, thanks.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, I've got uh, a certain someone you know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No no.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -she has to, uh, she wants to ask you w- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Also, she said something about some hair.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh yeah. Yeah, that's uh... that's another issue right there. Um, hmmm. I'll talk to her about that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, does, uh, drinking cause cancer?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, but it causes liver dysfunction and likely bar fights and automobile accidents.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, bar fights, but— <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Bar fights!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> -but I don't think that bar fights are that big of a problem.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I think bar fights are awesome.<br />
<br>''[People agree bar fights are awesome]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> But bar fights are bad. I got into a bar fight once and one of my hands got cut and two fingers from my left hand. Bar fights suck.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well, I think that might be more because you're Mexican. Are you sure you didn't lose them picking bo- picking grapes and- or something?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> No, Mexican people are more more- more much macho man; we get into bigger fights. We're more awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No- I think it might be because you got your hands stuck in some machinery when you were out picking in the vineyards.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't know about you guys, but I like- I like having bar fights.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Crashes Due To Math===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't have to be drunk to be in a bar fight or in an automobile accident, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but they increase the likeliness of it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You've been in an autobile— automobile accident, I mean, were you drunk?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I was distracted.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Uh, by what? I mean, it's kinda hard to be dist— you gotta be focused on driving man-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I was doing math in my head.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, math in your— <br />
<br>[Trolls talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> My mind got distracted by being its own calculator.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Are you good at math?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, is that for school?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Are you some kind of savant?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's impossible.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Guys, you're getting ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you like a mathematic genius or something?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> You know some artist people have like superpowers in their head. They can do like geniuses and add really well. ''[interrupted briefly by Jack saying something else about savant]'' Chris you are already an artist. Do you have any like, magical powers?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, I heard autistic people are really good at math. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Well not all the stereo- some of that sounds like stereotypes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[talking over Chris]'' ...it has to do with mental ability; I mean, what's the...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean I don't know- I mean I'm not saying that I'm a total genius. I mean I know- I know enough to get by.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What's the highest level of math you've taken Chris?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> College level.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I mean like algebra, or calculus or...?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. I believe I just did trigonometry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Very impressive.<br />
<br>[long pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So I was wondering. When did you get the CAD degree? I figured it's like a fine arts degree or something? I mean wha-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I designed a whole- I designed buildings and machinery and such along there. I designed the whole CWCVille shopping center.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don't you have a job then?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Your fans would love to see that Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' -I mean use that to design like, actual buildings? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I think I just told you I designed the CWCVille sho-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I don't mean in your comic. I'm just saying-<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde Isn't Popular And Chris Should Program===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well it's a good st-<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I heard you got some nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'll be putting an update on da YouTube soon, but not right now. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking maybe you could like, you know, get a degree in game design and make the Sonichu game? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah man, it's not that hard to learn programming. C++ man.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">''Falsion:'''</font> Clyde, he hates you, why are you talking?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm just giving him some advice, I mean C++ is-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you here? We don't like you. You totally ruined Chris's life.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't ruin his life. He ruined his own life.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yes you did. You've ruined his life. You raped his girlfriend. <br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks at once over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If he was the man he said he was, he'd have gone to Nintendo, made all that money. How- how are you going to make money now Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Time will tell.<br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks again]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, time will tell Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font>''[unclear]'' -need a plan, you know? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking uh, if- uh- would you be interested in getting a degree in game design. Making the game or something? Like if you had to? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Maybe but uh- I still have things to sort out in my real life.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah it's kinda unfortunate what happened with the Nintendo thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah- hang on a second, I'll be right back. Mm- ''[clattering]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So be honest guys am I really that much of a bother. I mean...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah you kind of are.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like a total dickfart.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You realize weed causes cancer? <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I didn't know that. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> And it causes the munchies. You're gonna get fat, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's okay, man, because I work out.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Do you play Guitar Hero standing up?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I play Guitar Hero while on the treadmill. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Will the Sonichu game be a- ''[muffled]'' -or a Wii one?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> It be a Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Wii would like to play. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh. I only got a DS. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I heard you are very good at HTML. Why don't you make a HTML Sonichu game? That would be awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't think you can make a game in HTML.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A- anyway I came back...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hey, Chris? How many courses did you have to take to get that degree in CAD? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -pretty sure you can make a game in HTML-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[speaking over]'' I'm took abo- took about two- took about two years to four years. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, if you can write HTML you can write C++, make your own games. Pretty simple man. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well it's something I'll consider. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde why are you talking to him? He hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm trying to give him some suggestions. I'm not insulting him, OK? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> HTML seems kinda outdated, so to speak. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font>I learn- I took two HTML classes so at least I know how to do- at least I know the ins and outs when it comes to like, workin' on it in the raw data- in the notepad.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> So you don't use Dreamweaver?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I also use Net- also use Netscape composer. <br />
<br>''[Someone starts singing 'Dreamweaver']''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I heard they went bankrupt or something.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't- I don- I don't listen to news because I don't care about bad news. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But that's not bad news that's just safety...<br />
<br>''[Talking over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why you gotta bring this bad vibe in here? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> OK OK I'll chill, I'm sorry it's just my wife- ''[can't hear over Chris typing extremely loud]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris you don't hear about these ones in a while. Like yesterday some guy in my town got run over by a train and he- he died. And that's a really bad thing, you know but you have to hear about it. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yeah but that's because you're Mexican. You Mexicans always play around the train tracks, what's with you? <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No come on, don't be racist.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> It's because Mexicans are stupid. I'm surprised I can use a computer. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' CrassCrab why do you have to be so mean?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> 'Cause my mother was raped by a Mexican. And I'm part Me- ''[muffled]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry man.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> That isn't fair to take it out on every other Mexican out there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His rule applied to millions. Just ignore him.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No I'm not my mother was raped by Mexicans.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> CrassCrab I'm tired of listening to you, get out of here. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Not all Mexicans are like that we- we- I am a nice Mexican guy. Not all Mexican guys are- ''[drowned out by typing]'' -Black guys are the people you should fear.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't get me started on them. But that will be another day. Cause I'm sick of hearing bad news.<br />
<br />
===Chris Types Fast (And Hates Hex-Box)===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris what are you uh- typing there?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm typing a email. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> How many words can you type? How fast can you type? Sounding fast there. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhh say about uh- sorta between thirty and a hundred. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's quite a good range man. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like "The Flash", minus the red jump-suit.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh Chris um- I was wondering if- ''[unclear]'' -game with Nintendo, would it be uh a Wii game or a DS game or both. I only own DS and I don't have any money for a Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[overlapping]'' Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wii, DS and Pla- hopefully uh- possibly uh, PlayStation 2 or 3. Never on [[Hex_Box|Hex-Box]]. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> When you gonna do this shit?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Why don't you like the Hex-Box? I mean I have an Xbox, I would love to play online with you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'd like to say this. Before Chris says anything about that I just wanna say that today my wife came home from the mall shopping for her usual clothes, that Gucci purse I had to buy for her. You know what she came home with? I wanted a PS3 but you know what she gave me was a frickin' Xbox 360. The Elite one? ''[someone speaks over]'' I know, I kept telling her like "Honey this isn't what I wanted. I wanted the PlayStation 3 so I can play LittleBigPlanet, Metal Gear Solid and Sonic Unleashed" <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You can put Sonic Unleashed on the Hex Box as well as Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Too whiny to make out]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Nintendo just- rejected your offer? Cause I- I heard a rumor that there was going to be a Sonichu game or something. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris uh. Cassie wants you to send her your Wii number so she can talk to you on the Wii. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright uhhhhh. I'll get- have to get my Wii number now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Send it to her in an email please.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they completely hate Sony. And they hate Microsoft as well. I mean this guy, Reggie? He always talks about kicking their ass and stuff. He's kinda crazy. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I know. Reggie's very mean he never brought out Mother 3 to America. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah I wanted to play that game.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talked over]'' -I'm tellin' you guys. Reggie's just a great ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Like what?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can- I can't say anything OK but... you'll see. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah so I don't think like if you got the deal with Nintendo I don't think they'd put it on like mu- like anything else but the Wii or DS. Yeah, cause that Reggie guy he frickin' hates Sony. And Microsoft. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wasn't he also the head of VH1?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or Pizza Hut.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. What are your favorite places to eat at? <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember um Peter Moore he used to - ''[unclear]'' -but before that he was with Sega when Dreamcast was out. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yup. Let me type this email please. I mean y'all keep talking I'll just listen. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's no reason to hate the Xbox. To be honest.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or um- Chris um- do you wanna release your game on Nintendo and on Sony. If you do talk to somebody like EA or something, you can like do um- multi-console thing like a third party thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[busy typing]'' Hmm. Well it's all to think about. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I mean Sega does third party now so um- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah well I'm gonna keep typing this email here. Y'all keep talking. <br />
<br>''[Sound of Chris typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's true, it's true. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Chris I wanted to tell you that Cassie's going to be here any- any second so you can talk to her. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Hm. ''[continues typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Don't you care about her? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[annoyed]'' I'm typin' da email to her right now! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah um 360 is pretty bad it um- red-rings all the time. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> I've had mine over two years. The same one. And it has not red-ringed yet. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Dude you have to pay $50 just so you can play online. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[echoing]'' Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah it's bullshit.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah it's totally free on PlayStation. And Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris. Chris. No, no, no, no, I gotta talk about this. [long pause] Chris...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupting]'' I get less connection problems myself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can't let you get away with this Chris. You spent over $1000 on the PlayStation Network. OK? And you say you can't afford $50 for the Xbox? Terrible reason. That's a terrible reason. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, um, Cogs I had a friend of mine whose red-ringed a lot of times. She did not like it at all. She got herself a PS3 instead. <br />
<br>''[Chris is STILL typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I heard that like- the PS triple eats up a lot of energy and like- has cau- has like- burned houses down. Cause it messes up the- no but the PS3 really- <br />
<br>''[More of Chris typing then audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So when's the next comic coming out Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I can't say. I don't have a date for it right now. I've been busy with the- with real life and such. You know getting the s- getting the website back up and all that. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh but I've been waiting so long. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I gotta tell you something Chris. ''[unclear]'' -to the trolls but I haven't done anythin' myself. It's run off into splinter groups doin' stuff to you. Ever since the Panda thing, I haven't done anything to you man. Everybody's been running round doing things. I have no control anymore. So I'm back here. This is why I'm back here. Do you understand? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. I hear you.<br />
<br />
===Nudes On YouTube===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I hear you got some uh- nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> What? <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hear you got some nudes on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Dudes?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Nudes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> That's what I thought- I have nothing na- I have nothing like that on the nu- on the YouTube. I've nothing like that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh someone posted the pics from the ED page. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> They're just tryin' ta get on- they're just tryin' ta get on my nerves again. But I'm not gonna let 'em.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Did you take those pictures or what? Where'd they come from?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Uh, are they Photoshopped?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah most of- Yes. Most of them are Photoshopped.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I can help you with ED. Chris I can help you with ED.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You can see the neck and the body doesn't quite match up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, Chris. Cassie's just arrived. She's just a little nervous about talking to you, but she's gonna talk to you soon. Is that OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I just got one quick comment. Look, the ED people were in contact with me, but I've lost contact with them. But I know you can delete that page permanently. I'm tryin' to help you man. You can get that page down forever. Even the entire site. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What, after you raped um- Sarah? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I'm trying to make amends. So let me do my business. All right?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's too late to make amends. Look what you did.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look what Chris has done. Look at what Chris has done, okay? ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um. Cogsdev said she had a look at the data, they have it up in Image editing software.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah. Well...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I don't know what to tell you there. <br />
<br>''[Several trolls speak at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Doesn't that mean they're real? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I don't think so. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You don't think so?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Well, did you take them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Then where did those pictures come from? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who took those?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I don't know. And I'd rather not talk about that anymore. It's making me feel uncomfortable.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Are you lying to your fans Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> We don't feel confort- we don't feel comfortable. We're big fans of your work and we don't like being lied to. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I'd like to make a point. It might just be a doppelganger [sic].<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, you know the thing I hate most is lies. I like to spread the truth about you Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You say you're honest, but you're lying to us.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[clearly annoyed]'' Fine, fine. Some those pictures are real. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Some of them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Some of them but not all of them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Like, which ones aren't real?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'd rather not go into detail because I'd rather not look at 'em. Cause uh- ''[interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' -are you ashamed of it?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Do you not like to look in the mirror?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You owe it- you owe it to your fans.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, but- yeah, but- yeah, but upon looking at those it's like ref- it's like reflecting a pe- uh p- a past moment in my life where I- I was played for the fool. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah, by the man in the pickle suit?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh that guy- I hate that guy.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah I saw- he was trolling some other people you know? So you're not alone, Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he took pictures of me like that too...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That guy's an asshole, I hate him.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhhh yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He took pictures of my wife too. Sick bastard. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> He's a peanut.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br>[another pause]<br />
<br />
===Chris Hates Harry===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I just uh- never was fond of it. Ever since it came out, I was never fond of it. ''[unclear as troll speaks over]'' -just like I hate Harry Potter because he's s- he's goin- he's uh- in compe- was in competition against the world of Pokemon. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Well that- that doesn't make sense. But they're two different medias. Pokemon-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah but- yeah but still he-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> -Harry Potter is a book.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah but he poses as competition against them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> That's not really competition. I mean- <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talks over Jack]'' Oh that reminds me about books- Vivi- Vivian wrote a book and sent it to you. You never read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes. I am afraid I- yeah, yeah- I'm uh- I've been uh- so I've been under uh- too much stress between internet and all that. I'll ge- I'll read it, I'll read it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's been waiting for your response for quite a long time.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I like the cover. (pause) Nice cover.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he is right about that. That is a nice cover. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah the book is pretty good- I read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Well I- I will definitely make it a point to uh- read it. Very soon. <br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Audible over the others]'' Did you ever read Twilight?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I've heard th- I've heard Twilight and I've seen the trailer but I haven't seen the movie, I'll wait for it to come out DVD or Blu-ray.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br />
===Random Access Humor Python Style===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh OK, I heard a lot of girls like Twilight. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I see. Hey Polly does your voice sound like that, 'cause it sounds like [[BlueSpike|a guy talking falsetto]]. I mean no personal offense. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> That's not very nice...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm sorry. Believe me I didn't mean any pe- anything personal it's just like, you know- hm- kind- just kinda takes me by surprise a bit, that's all.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I knew a girl like that in high school.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Sounding upset]'' I can't help it if I'm born like this.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I'm- I'm- I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah she's a girl. I saw her pics. She's a girl.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I'll s- I'll take his word for it. I'm sorry I cu- I accused you there.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um. OK. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You know, aut- I mean- let's- it's just uh- you know it's uh- you know it's uh a bit- just a spot of fun. [[Random-access_humor|Stupid humor]]. Monty Python's Flying Circus. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> We know you love that. There's just so many references to it in the comic. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah I d- after they put all of the entire series on PlayStation Network I downloaded the Hamlet episode- that was the one that had uh- Jimmy Hill parodying himself. It also had this funny bit where it was like, you know- ''[in a stupid voice]'' "...and now it's time for The Robinsons, an everyday story about blah-de-blah-de-blah-de-blah. Dum-de-dum-de-dum-de-duhhh-dum-de-dum"- and so on...<br />
<br>''[A troll begins to speak but is interrupted by a very high-pitched Chris]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> "Morning Mrs. Robinson- Morning Mrs. Robinson. Comin' out shoppin'? Oh- you've been shoppin', what did you buy? What's this?-" 'What did you buy this for?'[Trolls laugh over him]'' -It was a bargain!"<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I've heard you do that before. I don't know where. Anyway uh- uhm- Whatever happened to Jimmy Hill? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I haven't heard from him in a long time so just assuming uh- he gave up or uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I think he got a- I think he got a, uh- children's TV program in England.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well he ain't botherin' me, so I'm not worried about him anymore.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Ye- but he's stealing Sonichu. Bastardizing it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah he did but uh- he s- but haven't seen any updates on his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' -profile, he's still doing it.<br />
<br>''[Several trolls talk over each other about him having a TV show]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Fails At Spanish Pt. 2===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' <br />
<br>''[Troll says something more about the TV show, but it's muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wants to say hi. Just forgive her English because she can't speak very well, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> All right. Just sent her the email by the way, just now. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Hey, Chris. It's me, Cassie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi, Cassie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Fine, and you?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm feelin' OK. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Why haven't you emailed me? I was really about-was really worried about you. What's happened? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry. I be- I've bee- I've been busy with the Internet and the stress and all that. I sent ya an email just now go- it's got my Wii number in it so you can add me to your contacts. I've been talking to uh- I've been talking to Sarah lot- quite a bit lately. She's been helping me with uh- updating the Sonichu site, since I've uh- since I'm working on uh- it's re-uploading and such. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Kay, I believe you. I going to check ''[pronounced like 'sheg']'' it, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You're going to where?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[very quietly]'' Check it.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> To check it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> To "shag-it"? Is that the-<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Check the email. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[still doesn't understand]'' Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> I going to check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, check email. ''[Laughs]'' Yeah I'm sorry I tr- I tried to uh- understand but it just kind of messed up a little bit. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don- why don't you two speak in Spanish?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhh. I'm not exactly fluent. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ¿Sabes hablar español, Chris? (Do you know how to speak Spanish?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí, hablo español. (Yes, I speak Spanish)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Oh. ''[pause, one of the trolls says something to her]'' Oh, eso es muy sexy. (That is very sexy.)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Ohhhh. Te gusta. Te gusta muchísimo, (You like it. You like it a lot)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> La verdad, si. (To tell you the truth, yes)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Me amos mis amigas muchísimas. Sons muy bueñas! (I love my friends (feminine) a lot. They are very good.) [Correction: Amo a mis amigas muchísimo. Son muy buenas.] <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Oh, eso es tan cool en español! Muy bueno! (That's so cool in Spanish! Very good)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Muy bueño (very good)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Aha, exacto. (it is!)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]'' Okay, that's good. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Well, I going down, okay?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Okay, you're going down- by the way, let me ask ya Cassie, do you ever- you've uh- you've actually met uh Sarah May in person, haven't you? <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Not. She's on Internet.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Okay. That's cool- but anyway uh- you got- you d- you have my Wii number, uh- you can reply the email with your Wii number and it'll be registered on the Wii network. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[very haltingly]'' Yes. So. Cool. Talk with you Chris. You are so cool. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Heh. Uhhhh. You flatter me. Tú me flatteray. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[Weak laugh]'' Well, see you. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[In his 'baby voice']'' Adiós. ''[sigh]'' <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós, bebé.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós, chiquita bonita. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>[Pause as audio cuts out]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -it again. <br />
<br>[Another pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So anyway, Chris. I've been working on Rabbichoso for a day and uh- I was just wonderin' like, it's- it's supposed to compete with the Sonichu, you know? If you weren't aware of that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhhh. I grabbed onto d- grabbed onto g I- grabbed onto the... that gist. I'm aware- I'm aware of the gist of the theory. Uh. I'm aw- I'm aware that you're- that you're tryin' to compete. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know what competition does. It's drives uh- it drives consumer interest- Well that's why you know- It's great. You have to compete with high quality things. ''[muffled]''- that's why I'm trying to help. You know, compete. Just so you're aware of this, OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I see. -see. <br />
<br>[Pause]<br />
<br />
===Rabbichoso And Animu===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris we've been ge- been getting uh threatening images from the Pickle Man. Did you s- did you see the left? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I've not heard from the Pickle Man in lo- in a long time. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Apparently there are multiple ones because this one is, uh, not a darkie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh-huh. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> It's good that they're leaving you alone now. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Seems like they found more easier targets. Seeing as how you became [[Navy|saltier]].<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh. You know I originally got that line- quote from an e- ep- episode of ExCel Saga. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> From what?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> ExCel Saga.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Oh, ExCel Saga. Oh, yeah, that's a good anime.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> AIII I-Falazzo! (''He means [[ScotPalazzo|Il-Palazzo]]'')<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, have you ever seen two animes, ''[muffled]'' and Schooldays?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I have not seen either of those. I like Steel Angel Kurumi as well.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, how much Japanese do you know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only a little bit. I'm not totally fluent. I can say that with all honesty. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something unintelligible, not quite Japanese]''<!-- It sounds like he's saying "You say you can't- can you speak with me?" in CHINESE. --><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Huh?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Never mind, you won't understand it.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[unclear] Chris-Chan. Genki desu-ka?''<br />
<br />
===Chris Could Kill Clyde===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, I just wanted to say, uh, you're doing a good job, like, keeping calm even though Clyde is here. I mean u- I thought you'd be, like, more angry at him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm being calm with you guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> -I would have been choking him by now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I'd have kicked his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Preach to the choir. Pr- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I'd make him choke on a pickle if it were up to me.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You guys can't touch me otherwise I'd kick all your asses. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, bring it.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris could kick Clyde's ass anytime.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Let's see Chris do it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Bring it to me any day of the week and I'll definitely show him a hard- day's night. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah I think you could kick his ass.<br />
<br>[Trolls and Clyde talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Sings]'' -been a hard day's night...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -never mind, just...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean that as a- meant that as in I would beat... him up. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Kick his ass?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm very strong. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. I'm gonna see you later, OK?<br />
<br>''[Unison of goodbyes]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> OK see ya. Thank you so much Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[ignoring his fans]'' Yeah I can- I can lift about my weight. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Like um- if Clyde were right in front of you, what would you do to him?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Like, what kind of style of fighting do you have?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, shut up.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I gotta know my competition. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Personal- in the physical offense. ''[sigh]'' I would definitely be giving you so much physical pain. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's not a s- that's not a style. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I would beat you up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He deserves it man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, that's still not a style...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He uses fisticuffs. He's a gentleman. Gentleman fisticuffs. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Whatever, I'll just see-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Stop arguing and just-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ''[Over previous troll]'' I mean, if he did that to my sweetheart I'd fucking kill him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well. He's not- he's not going to come over and kill me, I know that. He doesn't have the money. [pause] You know I'm surprised that you're mad here. You're much kinder in person I thought you- Now I'm just expecting you at my door anytime, just waiting for you to stand here with an axe or something. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Knives are too messy. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Ah, now a sword- sword's are usually better.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What about poison?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Poison's good, poison's good.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde, what- do you want him to beat your ass?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I was just expecting it, you know.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, you know what's another thing? I would definitely not tell you how I would be hurting you, but I would definitely give you a who- big amount of pain. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, he's gonna keep you guessin'!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he deserves it. After everything he's done-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Muffled by troll]'' -going to kill me, I'd like to know. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I'm just going to let you cover in- worry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh so you're never going to show up, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Oh yes I will show up. But you just won't be expecting it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't even know where I live, do you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Find out!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Maybe I should give you my address. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, you should track him down and kick his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> But I'm going to leave you guessing too...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Defend Panda's h- Panda's honor.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, hi Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> 'sup Julie.<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br>''[Everyone talks over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde's A Dick===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I notice her mic doesn't work. But still I'm just letting her know that- acknowledge her presence. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're doing well staying calm even though Clyde's here.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, Clyde's a total dick.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Fucker.<br />
<br>''[Rustling]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I mean, he's taken over everything. The IRC. This. I can't- no one can stop him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' -over there, so...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll:'''</font> I- I like Rabbichoso.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Of course you do. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll''':</font> It's funny. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I will not offer any new comment on it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, OK. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, when can we expect the next Sonichu to be released.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, we've been eager.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It'll be soon. It will be soon.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah just ignore Clyde man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean if you're going to put a hard date on it, you'd better deliver your promise. If you don't, I'll strike harder. That's all I'm saying.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. You're saying if I don't set a date, you're gonna...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no. I'm saying don't make promises you can't keep. Don't make promises you can't keep.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He'll choke you with his medallion bitch!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who the hell do you think you are?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I agree with Cogs over there. Maybe you should do just a page a day, not release all at once. Keep his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you telling him this when he hates you?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm giving him suggestions man, OK? OK?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Only thing he's gonna suggest to you is 'shut the fuck up'!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, seriously man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It's alright. <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Penny Arcade's slow.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh you mean like Penny Arcade or 8-Bit Theater or MegaTokyo?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah like they're just boring. Then they became kind of sellouts.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Country Cookin===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Chris, where's your favorite place to eat?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. Can't really say uh- but I like country cookin'. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> What's country cooking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh no G's in the sto- no G's in the name by the way, no G. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah what's country cooking? I'm not familiar with that.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's like uh- som- something like Golden Corral. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But Golden Corral is a national franchise.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh Chris, how are your parents?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> They're OK.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br>[Long pause]<br />
<br />
===Sex Is Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I've got a sug- another suggestion. Now be quiet all of you cause I know you hate me. Just- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, Chris hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well don't defend him. He can defend himself OK? He's a man. But whatever-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let him speak.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm suggesting that- you go on and on about this sex stuff but you've never gotten laid, have you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I like to put myself in the imaginative situation that I'd like to be in and the sexual stimulation. So I can be ready for [[ego|myself]] for when I do actually have my first time.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well my first time was- I'll just say that it's terrible, OK? I didn't know what I was doing, she didn't know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let me guess, you prematurely ejaculated?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no, it's not like that you don't know what to do. Every woman's told me OK? You can't prepare-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Clyde]'' First time's always awkward...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -I learnt that mistake a while back, OK whatever. OK, you just- you can't prepare for your first time. You might as well just have a really bad first time so you learn from your mistakes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm not trying to defend Clyde or anything, but yeah it's kinda true. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Hmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The girl I first fell in love with is the girl I'm married to right now. Samantha just changed my world. But marriage does get boring.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Tips To STAY STRAIGHT===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I know how you say how important it is to stay straight, um- I'm having trouble staying straight, do you have any suggestions?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Watch a bunch of pornography with uh- with naked women. OK, a lot of naked women.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That happened to me one time...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, I have this friend I play video games with, is that gay? He's male by the way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry could you- I'm sorry could you repeat that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I have this guy I'm friends with he always comes over to my house to play video games. Is that gay? I'm kinda scared. You know? I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Hmm. Is he making any advances towards you? Personally. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I dunno how to tell. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Like uh sit- does he always sit next to you when he's playing games. Playing video games.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Yeah he usually does. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I see. Hmm. My- well- my suggestion in that case, would be to keep a heavy distance between you and that guy. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he meant anything gay by it though. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he means anything like- gay about it. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well, still- it's always best to find out- you can ask him. Don't be afraid to ask him. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> What would you do in this situation?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well if he said yes then I would uh- basically- let me think about that a moment. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you have any friends who're are like, guys?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only acquaintances and only a few of them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you play video games with people or anything? Do they come over to your house?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. No.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I remember-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> ''[Cuts Polly off]'' I'm just worried I might be gay or something. I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You probably are Falsion, but that's OK. No, look dude. It's okay to be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Leave him alone! Leave him alone! He's straight!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Why?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Hey, let's have a calm conversation here. Let's not have any fights.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br>''[Trolls speak over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I've been reading the Sonichu comics and man, they are page-turners! Seri- I was on- I was on the edge of my seat for a while. I ju- I couldn't- I couldn't- you know. Just had to read and read.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Thank you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, can I be your friend? I know I'm a guy. I don't mean anything gay by it. Can I be your friend? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. I dunno.<br />
<br />
===A Wild Snorlax Appears===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Do you want any hotdogs?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No thanks, I'm OK. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> No?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I was talking with my mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I was wondering if I could be your friend.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I h- heard you only like, you only like to be acquaintances. With guys. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, ummm. Yeah. Let's just pretty much leave it at acquaintance. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hello Mrs. Chandler. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> She can't hear you, I'm wearing my earphones.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Listen, I'm not gay. I don't- you know- yeah. Never mind.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I mean- I mea- I-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What do you have against gay people? I'm serious to hear this. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's just unnatural and it's against God's will. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, it's not like it's a choice. You can't change who you are like- you're a creative guy but I mean they're just gay. They can't change that. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm just answering a few questions mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You don't have to answer. Nobody's payin' you to do that.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yes they are.<br />
<br>''[shuffling sounds, clanging]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> It ain't none of their business no-way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I wouldn't be asked questions like that by employers or anybody. Don't tell people what you d- what you think. Keep that to yourself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris what's hap- what's happening?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, obviously, my mother is offering her input.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Tell her you're just talking to some friends. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' I don't need no back talk from somebody on the other end of the phone.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear you, Mom. Hmm. Hmm. <br />
<br>''[scraping sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> These- these idiots don't have any brains or- they don't have any idea this way or that.<br />
<br>''[more banging, clanging and tumbling sounds. Sounds like washing up]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Is right now a bad time right now? I mean-<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Pixelblocks, Pixelblocks!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Someone's saying "Pixelblocks." <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you saying [[Pixelblocks]]?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>''[Chris's mom has been singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful singing voice, Chris.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[Audio cuts back in]'' -all the anxiety, causing you stress.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, well sometimes they don't; they can be peaceful.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Well, your mom and dad get the crappy end of the stick.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm, a lot of us do.<br />
<br>''[more clattering sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Yeah, just like this nasty mess over here that you guys left that I got to clean up.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm. ''[Audio cuts]'' -Yeah, I took care of my bills. I mean, not completely, but I took care of them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> What about going to, uh, Redmond?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> We! (Wii?) <br />
<br>[unintelligible, windows beeps]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[laughing]'' Yeah, sweetheart pool.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Mmhmm. ''[laughing]'' Like the other side of the pillow.<br />
<br>''[someone sighing. Clanging noises return after short absence]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' ...is all, I mean, living with your parents is okay bad-in today's bad economy, but at 26, come on. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Shut up, you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I'm being nice.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde isn't so bad a guy. He does bad things, but he's pretty cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah he's reformed. He's seen the error- Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How- how could he do that to Sarah? I mean- That's not right.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah. Well, that's like Luke... That's like Luke and Laura from General Hospital. I know that's like, before y'all's time, but, um... Luke was a rapist and she-he raped Laura and then, like, a few months later they get married. So... ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, I believe Clyde was trying to make amends from his past actions.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, but Chris, can you uh- can you forgive him?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Random Troll:'''</font> ''[whispering]'' White whale, holy grail! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Can you forgive a small-dicked Asian? Just a thought.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He's not Asian! <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm half-Asian, okay? My parents ''[unclear]'' I don't really wanna go into it. It's too bo-boring for you people. But this is why I ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you there? Just makin' sure, buddy.<br />
<br>''[clattering]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Move out.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Another Troll''':</font> Well, how do I do that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi there, my kitty. ''[In baby voice]'' Yes, there's a pretty kitty.<br />
<br>''[Someone speaking with a voice-synth]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hang on a second. I've got, like, a thousand different... Oh, Crass, why'd you do that?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Because. You can unban him but, yeah. I'm not gonna friggin' stand for that. <br />
<br>''[Sound of a vacuum cleaner]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> I (m j d?) do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I heard the "g" word.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um, is that a vacuum cleaner?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Yeah, sounds like it is.<br />
<br>[Trolls speak but are drowned out by vacuum]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ...room or something.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I think the vacuum cleaner... <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If that's the government trying to do some kind of thing, then my name's Rusty Shackleford.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's a loud fan.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I have a fan above my stove, too.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Hey... I do, too.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Wait- wha- wait. You-you-you're in the kitchen? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Me too.<br />
<br>''[possibly Sonic game sound effects]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmhm? Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I'm pretty sure it's already asked, but I didn't catch the answer. When can we expect the next Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I-I-I told you my suggestion of releasing a page a day or something. I mean, it's a pretty good one. It-it-it allows for a good time. Finish a page a day. You upload it. You know? It's very good. Works very well.<br />
<br>''[Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh. I mean- you guys keep asking when he's going to finish it but I wonder how many pages are going to be in the new one? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> The last one was like, thirty. Just release it over the span of a month. Works fine. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...go up to ninety thousand...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[mutters something]''<br />
<br>''[Sound of Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Down by the river...side.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful voice, Chris.<br />
<br>''[clattering, typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[unclear, repeating the same two phrases]'' Gone down by the river, down by the water side, down by the riverside. Down by the waterside. Down by the riverside.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember ''[unclear]''<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -I'm hungry myself.<br />
<br>''[some kind of alarm sounding]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Then go eat.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I already ate.<br />
<br />
===Anime And Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I wonder what anime Chris watches nowadays. There's not many on television but do you still watch Japanese cartoons? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[In a bad accent]'' Kawaii desu ne. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I want to watch Shuffle. He said it was very good. He said it was sad. I don't know if I wanna watch- I don't like sad stuff. I like to be happy when I watch anime.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, and um, do you watch stuff like Bleach and um Code Geass or Naruto or something?<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I'm glad to hear that Shuffle isn't sad. I'm definitely going to watch it sometime.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um, yeah Chris that was a good call on Naruto. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah there's a lot of people who don't like it much either. Too popular.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But please. Please. Hope. ''[audio cuts out briefly]'' Uh, Chris, please consider When They Cry.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Ooh, I saw that one. It was a really good series.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, I know; that was good, like- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah. Both seasons of it. <br />
<br>''[Windows beeps, voices overlapping]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I could link you to Season One if you want. Yeah, Samantha got me into that. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...you'll give it a try, Chris. It's a very, very good series.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Hm. Hey, Julie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...lots of ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Watch Shuffle. You got the six episodes of Shuffle or... Which o- which anime? I'm sorry. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh and JoJo's Bizarre Adventure is also cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I really liked JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. Very ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Za warudo!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah, I think Shuffle is quite all right. I like Heidi. She's sweet and loyal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> That's a good one. One of my favorites is Black Lagoon.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris have you ever seen La Blue Girl?<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other about different anime]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, uh, Chris can I, my, uh, I don't know if it's all right, but, like, could you like, give me an email sometime? I could, uh... recommend you to... this anime that... Polly and... Julie like to watch. They're quite- they... Oh, C-and Cogs has recommended such great anime. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[talking to his mother]'' Yeah? That's ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> As well as Julie-Julie's the person that got me into anime.<br />
<br />
===People Love Poketunes===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> -we can go into this later cause I got my headphones on. And, Mom, you know what something else? They liked your singing.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> What? I don't sing.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> That's my laugh; that's my laugh. They couldn't hear me. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They heard you. Singin'. Just now.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I can't sing!<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I'm tone deaf. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They just heard you singing, and liked your voice.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay. Did you write checks for all those bills and pack everything ''[unclear]''?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yes, Mother, I did.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You're not telling me no story?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm not telling you no story.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> OK. It's important [''inaudible''] did you pay them?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, I paid that one. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay, you have to be honest with me, 'cause, see, you're settin'...<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm being honest, I'm being honest.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> How you respond to what [we] talk about. You say you ought to something and you don't do it then that's gonna change my ideas ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay... I'll be sure to pay the remaining differences next month.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> No, this month.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I know but I couldn't pay them all with 90 dollars so there's still some left ''[sound cuts]'' ...oh, you're cooking them up here, okay, that's why you turned the fan on over the stove.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br>''[Trolls rejoice and mock Momma Chandler]''<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 1|Mumble Chat 1]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 3|Mumble Chat 3]]|}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Spanish]]<br />
==Links==<br />
*[https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBOVVDS0JtSDNvMWs Download]<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_2&diff=163021Mumble 22012-09-26T23:30:50Z<p>Irisviel: /* Chris's Tips To STAY STRAIGHT */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{Articleofthenow}}<br />
[[Image:0839-MomDesi.JPG|thumb|right|180px|In Mumble 2, a Wild [[Barbara Chandler|Snorlax]] appeared.]]<br />
<br />
'''Mumble 2''' is the second [[Mumble]] chat that took place on 4 [[February 2009]]. More than an hour long.<br />
<br />
This is a more organized Q&A type chat than [[Mumble 1]]. Questions from [[Clyde]] about [[sex]] in the [[comic]] and interesting tidbits about how Chris believes sex is the same as romance. This is pretty hard hitting, with stuff like how Chris is into [[McDonald's|fast food]] yet he's against tobacco. A lot of drama involving Clyde.<br />
<br />
Length: '''1:49:17'''<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
<br />
===Notes===<br />
* Chris doesn't like Clyde because he stole his sweetheart.<br />
* Audio cuts out for a minute before Chris says: "...HYMEN!" (You broke her hymen)<br />
* Trolls claim [[Panda]] is with Clyde, Chris wants to hear her voice, they say she's busy<br />
* 'She and I WERE very close'<br />
* Chris didn't have $400-$800 to go and see Panda; claims he got this number from an airport website recommended by [[Miyamoto]]<br />
* Insists on [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] being in ''[[Animal Crossing]]''<br />
* Doesn't want to talk about his deal with them<br />
* Insists that he doesn't have to turn down his radio since his voice is louder (''it is horribly loud in the mic'')<br />
* Panda gave Clyde all of the sites, etc.<br />
* [[Sarah]] is going to be with Clyde, which Chris wants to deny<br />
* These motherfuckers keep talking over each other<br />
* Calls a troll's critique crap<br />
* [[Bubbles]] must be aroused, she isn't wet all the time<br />
* Bubbles is 90% water so does sperm just swim around forever? NO<br />
* Clyde: This is a children's comic, why so much sex?<br />
: '''Chris:''' It is romance. My best artwork is when they're making out 'romantic moments', drawn in protest to trolls. Shows that [[Rosechu]]s have vaginas, not [[duck]]s.<br />
* Admits to maybe going overboard<br />
* Trolls try to reason with him about the [[ED]] article: There wouldn't be an article if he didn't react like he does.<br />
* Trolls say that TV-Y7 means NO SEX but Chris points to romantic anime that have making out (cartoons are for kids, whatever the content).<br />
* Trolls talk about Japan being less strict about those things<br />
* Everyone gets to vote in [[CWCville]], even if they're [[Niggos|black]].<br />
* Got his idea from [[Mary Poppins]].<br />
* Troll tries to give historical background about cough medicine putting kids to sleep. Chris insists it was the lullaby that put them to sleep.<br />
* Discussion about Chris, 'gay message' sent by a troll<br />
* He calls Clyde a scoundrel<br />
* BELIEVE HIM HE IS STRAIGHT<br />
* Chris tries to speak Mexican at 20:50<br />
* Mexican speaks Mexican to him... he replies in Menglish<br />
* [[4-cent_garbage]] is located in Mexico<br />
* Someone says that he needs to improve his Mexican<br />
* Chris is against smoking, CWCville is smoke and alcohol free<br />
* Rehash of why [[tobacky]] is bad, his position on it, alcohol=bar fights<br />
* Chris's dad smoked and had several bypasses, has a pacemaker and has had heart attacks<br />
* Mention of his hair cuttings for his fans<br />
* Chris was doing math in his head, got in car crash.<br />
* Chris has taken college level math. Took trigonometry.<br />
* Trolls gang up on Clyde for stealing Panda<br />
* Time will tell when Chris will make the money he would have in the Nintendo deal<br />
* Trolls bash Clyde for his pot smoking <br />
* Chris doesn't watch news because it's bad news =(<br />
* Bashing of the Mexican<br />
* Chris can type 30 to 100 WPM, but can't type and talk at the same time<br />
* Chris says [[PSN]] is free though Clyde(?) points to the $1,000 Chris spent on PSN<br />
* Chris has been typing for 15 minutes now and it is VERY loud<br />
* Chris has been busy IRL therefore the comic release doesn't have a date<br />
* Someone points to nudes on [[YouTube]].<br />
* He does not have it on the YouTube, but he isn't going to take it anymore.<br />
* Claims some of the photos are photoshopped.<br />
* Clyde offers help to take ED page down.<br />
* Chris denies taking those pictures, doesn't want to talk about it, making him uncomfortable.<br />
* Some of the pictures are real. When questioned which ones are fake, Chris can't answer.<br />
* Chris hates Harry Potter because it was in competition with [[Pokémon]]!<br />
* Chris is too stressed to read Vivian's [[A Girl Who Brought Down the World|book]], but he likes the cover!<br />
* Polly, who has been talking the whole time is confronted by Chris who thinks she is a guy. Polly is upset. Chris apologizes.<br />
* [[Jimmy Hill]] has launched his Sonichu show<br />
* More Mexican talk at 55:10<br />
* Chris giggles and sighs happily when Cassie, another Mexican, compliments him and when she leaves he says 'Chiquita Bonita'<br />
* Rabbichoso talk (Sonichu.info)<br />
* Classic trolls are leaving Chris alone.<br />
* Chris likes Steel Angel Kurumi (''quote from [[Wikipedia:Steel Angel Kurumi|Wikipedia]]: often classified as ecchi due to the focus on fanservice and panty shots'')<br />
* Chris claims to be very strong, could beat Clyde up. Says he would show Clyde a [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force|Hard Day's Night]], and would give Clyde pain.<br />
* ShinyMarshtomp makes an appearance? Likes Rabbichoso<br />
* Chris likes to eat at [[Country Cookin]] (''like Golden Corral'')<br />
* Chris likes to imagine his first time. <br />
* Clyde says the first time is awful, Chris said it was because Clyde prematurely ejaculated<br />
* Watch porn with naked women to cure your gay<br />
* Guys sitting next to you = gay coming on to you<br />
* Falsion has been in the chat room and is afraid he is gay<br />
* A wild Snorlax appears<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
<br />
===Waiting for Chris===<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I can't wait to hear Chris! I'm a huge fan!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, goddamn these noodles are fantastic. Man, I wish I could eat like this everyday.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Have you eaten the rice balls?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no. These are noodles. These are-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Fan-fucking-tastic.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now they're all gone, it's fantastic, you know?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Sweetangie is Chris. Or, we think so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's definitely not the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm disappointed there's so many impostors out there. Kinda my fault, but, you know, if it weren't- ''[unintelligible]'' -hard to come by.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His mic was working last time he was here, just fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He usually capitalizes his words, like in every sentence.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is- I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Is it set to push to talk or something?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You better get us your email address Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah its push to talk. It's called push to talk. It's fantastic ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, just have him set it to voice activity. It works so much better that way.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Aww, he left.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> You guys are fucking idiots.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other again]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You guys scared him off by being guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, you fucking jackasses. Nice going.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Was that even the real...?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yes, that was the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He's too much of a pussy to talk.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, cause you scared him, or some- No, or he's too stupid to be.<br />
<br>''[Trolls Laugh]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Arrives===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Chris arrives, with radio playing loudly]'' Hello.<br />
<br>''[Trolls all greet him]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, now-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Why haven't you got your microphone working?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't know why my microphone [is] messed up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry, but we had an impostor here before.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm registered. I've got myself registered now. So, uh, hopefully-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> That's probably why. It had to like, uh- calibrate.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Well, I'm calibrated now.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So, Chris, have you seen Rabbichoso, it's fantastic.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't give a crap about your stupid pencil sketch.<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am not listening. I do not have to listen to ''you''.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Why, I'm not understanding [inaudible]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well for one thing,and I'll say it on here, you stole my sweetheart!<br />
<br>''[Cutout continues]''<br />
<br />
===PandaHalo, Trip to Redmond and Animal Crossing===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You broke her hymen!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I know it's a terrible mistake, but I plan to make it up to her. I'm getting married and uh- I'm doing the things I should do.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh and another thing, if she is really over there with you now, then put her on the mic. Please.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> She's not- He never said-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, Chris, she's very busy, OK. She's very busy.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's not over here right now. Okay? So lets drop it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, fine. Well could you tell her to please send me a message lettin' me know, for sure, so I can know- so I can know to-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' I'll let her know whatever you want, but it's her life. She doesn't have to send you a message. You failed her. You failed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' She and I were very close.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If you we're so close, then why didn't you go?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' Because I had- Aw, hang on a second. How do I- oh, that's right. This thing. Right. Mmm. Hold on a sec. Oh yeah, because I did not have four to eight hundred dollars!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It doesn't cost that much to go cross-country man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes it does. I know, I saw it on an airport website. Where I was be- Where I was- recommended to me by Mr. Miyamoto.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, you can drive there. It's not that hard.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened with that? I thought, um, didn't you have a deal with them or something? I heard a rumor that your characters were going to be in Animal Crossing.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, they are in Animal Crossing. And I did- and I do- I did have a deal with them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened though?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' I'd rather not say.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Radio, Clyde and Criticism===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, why don't you turn down the TV? It's hard to hear you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Annoyed sigh]'' I do not have a TV turned on in here.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I can hear it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have a radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I hear something in the background.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Burping throughout sentence]'' Well that's the- that would b- the radio. And it is not that loud.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But it shows up pretty well on your microphone mic. With due respect.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But still, my voice is louder than the radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Ah goo- ahh given.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh, Chris? Uh, when are you going to do the new Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something over Polly]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' Uh, I'll answer Polly's question. I'm not sure. It's, uh, it's in progress right now, I'm drawing it up.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I can't wait to read it!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Well, we'll see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Listen, Clyde kind of has admin on here, so we can't really do anything about him. So, yeah. I don't know.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Hard to hear over Chris's radio]'' ...with you guys. I love you guys. Just as much as Chris loves you guys. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I was angry. I was angry. But I'm calm now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't try to hurt any other person from now on.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm doing the best I can. I'm doing the best I can.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have much- I do not have much to say in response to that right now. Because I'm ticked off.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't let him get to you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're no better than he is, if you give in.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris, I just wanted to let you know I'm a huge fan of the comics, and I'm glad you keep doing what you're doing. You're doing a great job, and just keep it up, alright man?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, yeah, I appreciate the, uh, what's the word I'm looking for? The, the, uh- well, the encouraging words. Encouragement. I appreciate the encouragement. Well, there are things, uh- I- er- current events I do not appreciate. I appreciate the positive encouragement.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I can't really do anything. He took over the IRC channel. I used to be the owner. I mean Clyde. He's like taking over everything.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, it was because Panda gave it to me, you know. But anyway, I mean, you can't just listen to encouragement, you've got to listen to criticism, man. Criticisms are what make you better, you learn from your mistakes. You learn from mistakes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Be right back guys, my wife is calling.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I don't- I don't- Tons of people don't like the Rabbichoso art style, but you know, I gotta improve on that. That's something I plan to improve on. There's a lot of criticism in the death of Sonichu, right? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What? What did you just say?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a lot of criticism of Sonichu. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. For a moment there I thought you said something different.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What, what did you think I said? I'm just saying, there are people who like it and people who don't like it. You gotta start taking in those suggestions. You know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. So many things that will be improved upon. But, I just have to hear from Sarah herself that she really is going to be with you, Clyde. I have to hear it from herself. It's one thing to hear it from you and then it's- then on that note, it's just I find it very hard to believe. So I have to hear it from her.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I kinda think that Rabbichoso sucks. I mean, I think it could be funny, but it honestly looks like it's drawn by a kindergartner.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, Sonichu has evolved over the years. You can see that the art's getting better. Rabbichoso doesn't even look like something a beginner would do, honestly. I mean, ''[Interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A whole bunch of crap!<br />
<br>''[Everyone starts talking at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, Sonichu is in color.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I know, I accept his criticism. But you just called it crap! Now that's just rude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have emotions going behind me- uh, behind that opinion.<br />
<br />
===Cassie===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, did you get my message.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Aren't you going to be the gentleman, then? Aren't you gonna be the gentleman?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I just want to ask you, Chris. I'm Cassie's friend. She- she's worried sick about you. Why haven't you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did email her! As a- I- I haven't gotten any re-plies from her. I have emailed her and I have instant messaged her on A.I.M. and Skype. I haven't heard back from her. I don't know what's going on there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> ...you emailed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> When was the last time you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, hang on, I'll check.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris? I have a question. My fa- One of my favorite new characters is, um, Simonla, and like, I also like Zapina as well. Um, are they gonna have bigger parts in the series later on?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, could you repeat that question?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I was wondering if Simonla and Zapina will either have bigger parts in the series later on. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [[Sonichu_10#The_Final_Countdown|Possibly]]. Possibly, but, uh, I can't say for sure. Oh, and, uh, to answer your question, uh- in answer to, uh, I believe, uh, Screwhead, who asked? It was about four days ago. About four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Yeah. Four days ago? Okay, I'll tell her to check it out.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> The last email I sent was about four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> She'll contact you in a while, though.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I'll tell her to check it out and- and thanks Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright. Mm.<br />
<br />
===Bubbles's Pussy and Sex in the Comics===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris? I have a question.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, my favorite character is Bubbles, I kinda liked the, uh, the thing she had going with Blake, where she was kind of keeping the relationship secret. I thought that was kinda clever. I was wondering, uh, she's a water-type, so does that mean that her vagina is always wet, or does she have to be aroused like a normal woman?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, aroused. That's applied for all the, uh, Rosechus there. And also, like, you know, she's not just a water-type, she's also- she's a water- and electric-type, like uh- oh, shoot- What's the name of that one? Originated from Gold-Silver-Crystal series, uh, evolves from Chinchou? Lanturn. And she has, uh, she has Volt Absorb ability.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, Chris, another question following Bubbles. Uh, her body is 90% water, and now this thing about the whole sexual intercourse- about it. Now, don't take this rude, and you don't need to answer me... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...I totally respect your creative work. My wife actually got me into this, uh, show actually. So, what happens is- like, as you know, like, semens are like little fishes in themselves. Would that mean, I mean, would they actually have a route to fly into the egg, in theory, or do they just swim around her whole body, just forever just swimming around.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. The, uh, the internal or- the internal organs uh, for the Rosechus are pretty much the same thing, so I'd say pre- about, uh, as good chance as most any other mammal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, so you mean she's able to control her density a little bit more. She- I understand now. She's able to control more her density from the 90% water. Okay. That pretty much answers it just perfectly. That's been bothering me at work. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I got another question, Chris, about this whole sexual thing. I mean, this is a children's comic, right? Why is there so much sex in it?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. It's called romance, and my- and my- if you'll notice throughout the comics my best pieces of artwork among which were those where dey were kissing and making out. Romantic moments.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a hidden page-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' And because- and because- and because of the tension from, uh, the trolls and Encyclopedia Dramatica, I just felt like doing that in protest against them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, but childre-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' Yes but how is that really a protest? That, you know, you know, are, are you like referencing to the 60's when women burned their bras? That was in protes- That was feminism. Saying that they weren't slaves to men. Do you even understand the whole thing?<br />
<br>''[Multiple voices are heard at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Now, to tell you the truth, I never really thought about, I never really thought about that when I-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Chris]'' Then how is, stripping was, how was that protest-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Jack]'' It shows that they have vaginas and NOT dicks. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well you know the dick thing was the fact that they were just, you know, mocking you. I think you went overboard with that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well maybe I did. Maybe I did. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, you did, because that seems kind of excessive, kind of-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' I don't think they would have even bothered to write about an article about you if you didn't just keep reacting like that.<br />
<br />
===Chris justifies sex in a kids' comic===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I have another question.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The point some of us are trying to make is, if it's TV-Y7 that means there should really be no sex in it at all.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible over other people]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's pretty much incorrect, I mean, uh, there's so many romantic anime that's TV-Y7, and they shoul- they have making out.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, a lot of things in Japan, Japan has stricter standards-not stricter, I mean looser guidelines than America. It's much different.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear ya.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I was just wondering what Bubbles, um, she has a, that water whirlwind attack, I was just curious if you had any plans to make- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Butting in]'' By the way, that was a Whirl- Whirlpool.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font>Yeah, Whirlpool, sorry, sorry, Whirlpool, but do you have any plans to mix an, uh, Electric-type attack with that, since water conducts electricity, right? It could be a very powerful-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah, she did, she did an electric attack amongst the- the walls of that Whirlpool and she let out. In case you didn't know, there's a- little bits of lightning bolts among which-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, oh, I'm sor- I didn't notice that, I'm sorry, I'll go take another look. Thank you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hey Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> You make some pretty sweet Little Big Planet levels.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you.<br />
<br />
===Chris on Benadryl babysitting===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, there's a message from Cogs on the side, it's about, uh, do women not have the right to vote already in CWCville.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, evry- Everybody, no matter what age, no matter what gender or race, everybody has the right to vote in CWCville. Even if they're black.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Then what's up with the "Votes for Women" thing, I was-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Not just vote women, but- ''[interrupted]'' any other ethnicities, and gays?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't understand-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did that- heard it in Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What? Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, man, Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, yeah, that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's a classic. It's my favorite movie of all time.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that movie was, like, based in the 1900s.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but still I- still I agreed with that message there-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Taken out of context, that makes it seem like CWCville's set in the 1960s.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What message? That children should be given cough medicine so they'll go to sleep?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''What?''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that's what women used to do back in- That's what mothers, friggin' nurses and stuff used to do to kids in the 1900s, is give children, like, you know, cough medicine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Cause- cause the medicine- uh, correction, the medicine did not put them to sleep, there was a lullaby, not the cough medicine. They only had to take the cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ...because it rained, before dere, and it was not, and it was to, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Rain means cough medicine doesn't have anything to do with each other. That's not how friggin' germs are spread, or colds are gotten. Colds are gotten through germs, not the rain.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How is cough medicine any different from today's parents that just let their kids watch TV until they fall asleep? I mean, it's just as bad.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well- Cough medicine has a lot to do with the psychological effects of it. Obviously if you get- if you keep giving fre-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Thanks, Samantha, that was delicious.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's my, uh, Samantha-<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, that's we're all saying, cause I've heard that there's a lot of different chemicals in cough medicine. You could pick up a ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I don't even take cough medicine, because I'm not a pussy.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Anyway, I never put any references, I never did any references or plan any references to cough medicine or anything of that sort.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Well, Chris, Cassie says the last e-mail she got from you was on the 17th. How 'bout your being gay? Is that true?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[sigh]'' That wa- That was somebody had- That was Clyde hacking through my e-mail and spammed that to my contacts.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, I definitely did not do that-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You're a scoundrel-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -a slanderous lie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I did not do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Whoa-whoa-whoa. Wow. Well, thanks for that. She was worried that you were- that you don't like her.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> You're a scoundrel, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't do that. That was someone else.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I was wondering, because I've heard other news too, I was really hoping that you weren't gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Believe me, I'm straight.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I'll take your word for it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you. And, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Cogs- Cogs got a way- she showed us that, okay? I mean, you only ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br />
===Chris's fail-riffic Spanish===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So, Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, Screwhead's from Mexico. I heard you like Spanish, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hola, Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You know Spanish, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí. Conoso Mexico. Tomé dos años ''[unclear]'' mi escuela secundaria. (Yes, I know Mexico. I took two years [in, possibly] my secondary school.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has venido en Mexico? (Have you come to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, lo siento? (Uh, I'm sorry?)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has estado en Mexico? (Have you been to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Estoy Mexico? No. (I am Mexico? No.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[slowly]'' Has estado, um, in Mexico. Has venir? (Have you been to Mexico? Have gone?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Uh, no, I hav- no, no tengo pansars. ''[sic]'' (no, I don't have pansars (?))<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I think, uh, I think I meant to say- I'm pretty sure-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Did you just say you don't wear pants?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, no, I was trying to say, ah, I don't have plans to go in Mexico at the moment.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's what I understood what he was saying there.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, did you know that, that 4-cent garbage website is located in Mexico?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> That's why-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, that's why they can't get it shut down.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]'' borders, plus it's cheaper to run sites over there; they have, like, several servers.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wanted to talk to you, but she couldn't make it here, well, and, she wants to be your Spanish teacher, because she says that you've got room to improve your Spanish.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Oh, that Cassie. Yeah, I'm sorry, I thought you were- I got mixed up. Um... Yeah, um, I'm sorry, I, uh, I haven't talked to that- I haven't talked to Cassie in a while, but I've been mostly talking to, uh, her gal- her, uh, gal-pal and I'm sure- I'm sure she'd tell you a lot about her...<br />
<br />
===In which the trolls discuss bar fights===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey Chris, how- how does Sonichu keep Rosechu from spending more than a hundred dollars at the mall? I've always wondered how he could manage to do that. I've always had problems with that myself.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That wa- That time at the mall, it was, uh, Kel loaned the credit card. And it's like, yeah- she gave- she gave Sonichu the responsibility of that credit card. She did.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I've always given my advice on cannabis, you should do the ''[unintelligible]'', Cogs Chris, but I think she wants your response.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, one of my friends sent me this picture, and I think you might find it kinda disturbing just because they say it's proof that you're gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Aw yeah, I saw that, that's just a crappy Photoshop.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No, that one doesn't- this one doesn't look Photoshopped at all.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'm not gonna look at it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Oh, you're not? Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, uh, you say you're against smoking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. As a matter of fact, CWCville is a smoke-free, non-alcoholic city.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[partially drowned out]'' That's what we call a totalitarian state...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, and, uh, in the pilot episode with Seth MacFarlane, of, you know, Family Guy? He's always smoking. What do you think about that?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Go smoke.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I just- I just take that with a grain of salt, and, uh, you know, that's what-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, if he can smoke, why can't anyone else? I mean, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Because it causes cancer!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> So does a lot of things.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> It could be a prop pipe.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> In any case, I'm not- in any, in any case I've never done it and I never will.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, but eating too much fast food can give you a heart attack. I mean... so many things are deadly for you.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What about fast food, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> My father used to smoke and he went through a whole bunch of heart attacks. He suffered three- <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Well, I think that might have to do more with his weight.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He suffered through three or four triple bypasses.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I think that's... that's more like a weight issue.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He has a pacemaker!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, eh...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey ya guys, leave him alone. Ya know, my granddad, he smoked most of his life. He quit for 25 years and still died of lung cancer. I mean that's just the way it is. And your body never gets rid of it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, what about ''[pause]'' Chris, what about fast food? That's- that's bad for you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey Chris. Chris, could you do me a favor and send an email to Cassie? She's very worried about you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Yeah sure, I'll send her an email later.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, thanks.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, I've got uh, a certain someone you know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No no.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -she has to, uh, she wants to ask you w- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Also, she said something about some hair.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh yeah. Yeah, that's uh... that's another issue right there. Um, hmmm. I'll talk to her about that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, does, uh, drinking cause cancer?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, but it causes liver dysfunction and likely bar fights and automobile accidents.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, bar fights, but— <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Bar fights!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> -but I don't think that bar fights are that big of a problem.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I think bar fights are awesome.<br />
<br>''[People agree bar fights are awesome]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> But bar fights are bad. I got into a bar fight once and one of my hands got cut and two fingers from my left hand. Bar fights suck.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well, I think that might be more because you're Mexican. Are you sure you didn't lose them picking bo- picking grapes and- or something?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> No, Mexican people are more more- more much macho man; we get into bigger fights. We're more awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No- I think it might be because you got your hands stuck in some machinery when you were out picking in the vineyards.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't know about you guys, but I like- I like having bar fights.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Crashes Due To Math===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't have to be drunk to be in a bar fight or in an automobile accident, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but they increase the likeliness of it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You've been in an autobile— automobile accident, I mean, were you drunk?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I was distracted.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Uh, by what? I mean, it's kinda hard to be dist— you gotta be focused on driving man-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I was doing math in my head.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, math in your— <br />
<br>[Trolls talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> My mind got distracted by being its own calculator.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Are you good at math?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, is that for school?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Are you some kind of savant?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's impossible.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Guys, you're getting ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you like a mathematic genius or something?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> You know some artist people have like superpowers in their head. They can do like geniuses and add really well. ''[interrupted briefly by Jack saying something else about savant]'' Chris you are already an artist. Do you have any like, magical powers?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, I heard autistic people are really good at math. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Well not all the stereo- some of that sounds like stereotypes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[talking over Chris]'' ...it has to do with mental ability; I mean, what's the...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean I don't know- I mean I'm not saying that I'm a total genius. I mean I know- I know enough to get by.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What's the highest level of math you've taken Chris?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> College level.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I mean like algebra, or calculus or...?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. I believe I just did trigonometry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Very impressive.<br />
<br>[long pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So I was wondering. When did you get the CAD degree? I figured it's like a fine arts degree or something? I mean wha-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I designed a whole- I designed buildings and machinery and such along there. I designed the whole CWCVille shopping center.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don't you have a job then?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Your fans would love to see that Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' -I mean use that to design like, actual buildings? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I think I just told you I designed the CWCVille sho-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I don't mean in your comic. I'm just saying-<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde Isn't Popular And Chris Should Program===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well it's a good st-<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I heard you got some nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'll be putting an update on da YouTube soon, but not right now. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking maybe you could like, you know, get a degree in game design and make the Sonichu game? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah man, it's not that hard to learn programming. C++ man.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">''Falsion:'''</font> Clyde, he hates you, why are you talking?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm just giving him some advice, I mean C++ is-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you here? We don't like you. You totally ruined Chris's life.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't ruin his life. He ruined his own life.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yes you did. You've ruined his life. You raped his girlfriend. <br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks at once over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If he was the man he said he was, he'd have gone to Nintendo, made all that money. How- how are you going to make money now Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Time will tell.<br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks again]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, time will tell Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font>''[unclear]'' -need a plan, you know? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking uh, if- uh- would you be interested in getting a degree in game design. Making the game or something? Like if you had to? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Maybe but uh- I still have things to sort out in my real life.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah it's kinda unfortunate what happened with the Nintendo thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah- hang on a second, I'll be right back. Mm- ''[clattering]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So be honest guys am I really that much of a bother. I mean...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah you kind of are.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like a total dickfart.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You realize weed causes cancer? <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I didn't know that. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> And it causes the munchies. You're gonna get fat, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's okay, man, because I work out.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Do you play Guitar Hero standing up?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I play Guitar Hero while on the treadmill. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Will the Sonichu game be a- ''[muffled]'' -or a Wii one?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> It be a Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Wii would like to play. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh. I only got a DS. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I heard you are very good at HTML. Why don't you make a HTML Sonichu game? That would be awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't think you can make a game in HTML.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A- anyway I came back...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hey, Chris? How many courses did you have to take to get that degree in CAD? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -pretty sure you can make a game in HTML-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[speaking over]'' I'm took abo- took about two- took about two years to four years. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, if you can write HTML you can write C++, make your own games. Pretty simple man. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well it's something I'll consider. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde why are you talking to him? He hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm trying to give him some suggestions. I'm not insulting him, OK? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> HTML seems kinda outdated, so to speak. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font>I learn- I took two HTML classes so at least I know how to do- at least I know the ins and outs when it comes to like, workin' on it in the raw data- in the notepad.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> So you don't use Dreamweaver?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I also use Net- also use Netscape composer. <br />
<br>''[Someone starts singing 'Dreamweaver']''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I heard they went bankrupt or something.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't- I don- I don't listen to news because I don't care about bad news. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But that's not bad news that's just safety...<br />
<br>''[Talking over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why you gotta bring this bad vibe in here? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> OK OK I'll chill, I'm sorry it's just my wife- ''[can't hear over Chris typing extremely loud]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris you don't hear about these ones in a while. Like yesterday some guy in my town got run over by a train and he- he died. And that's a really bad thing, you know but you have to hear about it. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yeah but that's because you're Mexican. You Mexicans always play around the train tracks, what's with you? <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No come on, don't be racist.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> It's because Mexicans are stupid. I'm surprised I can use a computer. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' CrassCrab why do you have to be so mean?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> 'Cause my mother was raped by a Mexican. And I'm part Me- ''[muffled]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry man.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> That isn't fair to take it out on every other Mexican out there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His rule applied to millions. Just ignore him.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No I'm not my mother was raped by Mexicans.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> CrassCrab I'm tired of listening to you, get out of here. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Not all Mexicans are like that we- we- I am a nice Mexican guy. Not all Mexican guys are- ''[drowned out by typing]'' -Black guys are the people you should fear.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't get me started on them. But that will be another day. Cause I'm sick of hearing bad news.<br />
<br />
===Chris Types Fast (And Hates Hex-Box)===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris what are you uh- typing there?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm typing a email. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> How many words can you type? How fast can you type? Sounding fast there. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhh say about uh- sorta between thirty and a hundred. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's quite a good range man. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like "The Flash", minus the red jump-suit.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh Chris um- I was wondering if- ''[unclear]'' -game with Nintendo, would it be uh a Wii game or a DS game or both. I only own DS and I don't have any money for a Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[overlapping]'' Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wii, DS and Pla- hopefully uh- possibly uh, PlayStation 2 or 3. Never on [[Hex_Box|Hex-Box]]. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> When you gonna do this shit?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Why don't you like the Hex-Box? I mean I have an Xbox, I would love to play online with you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'd like to say this. Before Chris says anything about that I just wanna say that today my wife came home from the mall shopping for her usual clothes, that Gucci purse I had to buy for her. You know what she came home with? I wanted a PS3 but you know what she gave me was a frickin' Xbox 360. The Elite one? ''[someone speaks over]'' I know, I kept telling her like "Honey this isn't what I wanted. I wanted the PlayStation 3 so I can play LittleBigPlanet, Metal Gear Solid and Sonic Unleashed" <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You can put Sonic Unleashed on the Hex Box as well as Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Too whiny to make out]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Nintendo just- rejected your offer? Cause I- I heard a rumor that there was going to be a Sonichu game or something. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris uh. Cassie wants you to send her your Wii number so she can talk to you on the Wii. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright uhhhhh. I'll get- have to get my Wii number now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Send it to her in an email please.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they completely hate Sony. And they hate Microsoft as well. I mean this guy, Reggie? He always talks about kicking their ass and stuff. He's kinda crazy. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I know. Reggie's very mean he never brought out Mother 3 to America. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah I wanted to play that game.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talked over]'' -I'm tellin' you guys. Reggie's just a great ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Like what?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can- I can't say anything OK but... you'll see. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah so I don't think like if you got the deal with Nintendo I don't think they'd put it on like mu- like anything else but the Wii or DS. Yeah, cause that Reggie guy he frickin' hates Sony. And Microsoft. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wasn't he also the head of VH1?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or Pizza Hut.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. What are your favorite places to eat at? <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember um Peter Moore he used to - ''[unclear]'' -but before that he was with Sega when Dreamcast was out. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yup. Let me type this email please. I mean y'all keep talking I'll just listen. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's no reason to hate the Xbox. To be honest.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or um- Chris um- do you wanna release your game on Nintendo and on Sony. If you do talk to somebody like EA or something, you can like do um- multi-console thing like a third party thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[busy typing]'' Hmm. Well it's all to think about. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I mean Sega does third party now so um- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah well I'm gonna keep typing this email here. Y'all keep talking. <br />
<br>''[Sound of Chris typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's true, it's true. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Chris I wanted to tell you that Cassie's going to be here any- any second so you can talk to her. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Hm. ''[continues typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Don't you care about her? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[annoyed]'' I'm typin' da email to her right now! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah um 360 is pretty bad it um- red-rings all the time. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> I've had mine over two years. The same one. And it has not red-ringed yet. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Dude you have to pay $50 just so you can play online. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[echoing]'' Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah it's bullshit.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah it's totally free on PlayStation. And Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris. Chris. No, no, no, no, I gotta talk about this. [long pause] Chris...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupting]'' I get less connection problems myself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can't let you get away with this Chris. You spent over $1000 on the PlayStation Network. OK? And you say you can't afford $50 for the Xbox? Terrible reason. That's a terrible reason. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, um, Cogs I had a friend of mine whose red-ringed a lot of times. She did not like it at all. She got herself a PS3 instead. <br />
<br>''[Chris is STILL typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I heard that like- the PS triple eats up a lot of energy and like- has cau- has like- burned houses down. Cause it messes up the- no but the PS3 really- <br />
<br>''[More of Chris typing then audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So when's the next comic coming out Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I can't say. I don't have a date for it right now. I've been busy with the- with real life and such. You know getting the s- getting the website back up and all that. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh but I've been waiting so long. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I gotta tell you something Chris. ''[unclear]'' -to the trolls but I haven't done anythin' myself. It's run off into splinter groups doin' stuff to you. Ever since the Panda thing, I haven't done anything to you man. Everybody's been running round doing things. I have no control anymore. So I'm back here. This is why I'm back here. Do you understand? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. I hear you.<br />
<br />
===Nudes On YouTube===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I hear you got some uh- nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> What? <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hear you got some nudes on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Dudes?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Nudes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> That's what I thought- I have nothing na- I have nothing like that on the nu- on the YouTube. I've nothing like that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh someone posted the pics from the ED page. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> They're just tryin' ta get on- they're just tryin' ta get on my nerves again. But I'm not gonna let 'em.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Did you take those pictures or what? Where'd they come from?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Uh, are they Photoshopped?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah most of- Yes. Most of them are Photoshopped.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I can help you with ED. Chris I can help you with ED.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You can see the neck and the body doesn't quite match up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, Chris. Cassie's just arrived. She's just a little nervous about talking to you, but she's gonna talk to you soon. Is that OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I just got one quick comment. Look, the ED people were in contact with me, but I've lost contact with them. But I know you can delete that page permanently. I'm tryin' to help you man. You can get that page down forever. Even the entire site. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What, after you raped um- Sarah? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I'm trying to make amends. So let me do my business. All right?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's too late to make amends. Look what you did.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look what Chris has done. Look at what Chris has done, okay? ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um. Cogsdev said she had a look at the data, they have it up in Image editing software.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah. Well...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I don't know what to tell you there. <br />
<br>''[Several trolls speak at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Doesn't that mean they're real? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I don't think so. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You don't think so?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Well, did you take them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Then where did those pictures come from? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who took those?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I don't know. And I'd rather not talk about that anymore. It's making me feel uncomfortable.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Are you lying to your fans Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> We don't feel confort- we don't feel comfortable. We're big fans of your work and we don't like being lied to. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I'd like to make a point. It might just be a doppelganger [sic].<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, you know the thing I hate most is lies. I like to spread the truth about you Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You say you're honest, but you're lying to us.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[clearly annoyed]'' Fine, fine. Some those pictures are real. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Some of them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Some of them but not all of them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Like, which ones aren't real?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'd rather not go into detail because I'd rather not look at 'em. Cause uh- ''[interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' -are you ashamed of it?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Do you not like to look in the mirror?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You owe it- you owe it to your fans.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, but- yeah, but- yeah, but upon looking at those it's like ref- it's like reflecting a pe- uh p- a past moment in my life where I- I was played for the fool. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah, by the man in the pickle suit?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh that guy- I hate that guy.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah I saw- he was trolling some other people you know? So you're not alone, Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he took pictures of me like that too...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That guy's an asshole, I hate him.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhhh yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He took pictures of my wife too. Sick bastard. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> He's a peanut.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br>[another pause]<br />
<br />
===Chris Hates Harry===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I just uh- never was fond of it. Ever since it came out, I was never fond of it. ''[unclear as troll speaks over]'' -just like I hate Harry Potter because he's s- he's goin- he's uh- in compe- was in competition against the world of Pokemon. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Well that- that doesn't make sense. But they're two different medias. Pokemon-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah but- yeah but still he-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> -Harry Potter is a book.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah but he poses as competition against them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> That's not really competition. I mean- <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talks over Jack]'' Oh that reminds me about books- Vivi- Vivian wrote a book and sent it to you. You never read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes. I am afraid I- yeah, yeah- I'm uh- I've been uh- so I've been under uh- too much stress between internet and all that. I'll ge- I'll read it, I'll read it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's been waiting for your response for quite a long time.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I like the cover. (pause) Nice cover.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he is right about that. That is a nice cover. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah the book is pretty good- I read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Well I- I will definitely make it a point to uh- read it. Very soon. <br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Audible over the others]'' Did you ever read Twilight?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I've heard th- I've heard Twilight and I've seen the trailer but I haven't seen the movie, I'll wait for it to come out DVD or Blu-ray.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br />
===Random Access Humor Python Style===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh OK, I heard a lot of girls like Twilight. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I see. Hey Polly does your voice sound like that, 'cause it sounds like [[BlueSpike|a guy talking falsetto]]. I mean no personal offense. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> That's not very nice...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm sorry. Believe me I didn't mean any pe- anything personal it's just like, you know- hm- kind- just kinda takes me by surprise a bit, that's all.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I knew a girl like that in high school.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Sounding upset]'' I can't help it if I'm born like this.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I'm- I'm- I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah she's a girl. I saw her pics. She's a girl.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I'll s- I'll take his word for it. I'm sorry I cu- I accused you there.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um. OK. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You know, aut- I mean- let's- it's just uh- you know it's uh- you know it's uh a bit- just a spot of fun. [[Random-access_humor|Stupid humor]]. Monty Python's Flying Circus. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> We know you love that. There's just so many references to it in the comic. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah I d- after they put all of the entire series on PlayStation Network I downloaded the Hamlet episode- that was the one that had uh- Jimmy Hill parodying himself. It also had this funny bit where it was like, you know- ''[in a stupid voice]'' "...and now it's time for The Robinsons, an everyday story about blah-de-blah-de-blah-de-blah. Dum-de-dum-de-dum-de-duhhh-dum-de-dum"- and so on...<br />
<br>''[A troll begins to speak but is interrupted by a very high-pitched Chris]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> "Morning Mrs. Robinson- Morning Mrs. Robinson. Comin' out shoppin'? Oh- you've been shoppin', what did you buy? What's this?-" 'What did you buy this for?'[Trolls laugh over him]'' -It was a bargain!"<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I've heard you do that before. I don't know where. Anyway uh- uhm- Whatever happened to Jimmy Hill? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I haven't heard from him in a long time so just assuming uh- he gave up or uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I think he got a- I think he got a, uh- children's TV program in England.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well he ain't botherin' me, so I'm not worried about him anymore.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Ye- but he's stealing Sonichu. Bastardizing it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah he did but uh- he s- but haven't seen any updates on his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' -profile, he's still doing it.<br />
<br>''[Several trolls talk over each other about him having a TV show]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Fails At Spanish Pt. 2===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' <br />
<br>''[Troll says something more about the TV show, but it's muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wants to say hi. Just forgive her English because she can't speak very well, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> All right. Just sent her the email by the way, just now. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Hey, Chris. It's me, Cassie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi, Cassie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Fine, and you?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm feelin' OK. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Why haven't you emailed me? I was really about-was really worried about you. What's happened? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry. I be- I've bee- I've been busy with the Internet and the stress and all that. I sent ya an email just now go- it's got my Wii number in it so you can add me to your contacts. I've been talking to uh- I've been talking to Sarah lot- quite a bit lately. She's been helping me with uh- updating the Sonichu site, since I've uh- since I'm working on uh- it's re-uploading and such. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Kay, I believe you. I going to check ''[pronounced like 'sheg']'' it, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You're going to where?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[very quietly]'' Check it.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> To check it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> To "shag-it"? Is that the-<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Check the email. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[still doesn't understand]'' Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> I going to check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, check email. ''[Laughs]'' Yeah I'm sorry I tr- I tried to uh- understand but it just kind of messed up a little bit. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don- why don't you two speak in Spanish?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhh. I'm not exactly fluent. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ¿Sabes hablar español, Chris? (Do you know how to speak Spanish?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí, hablo español. (Yes, I speak Spanish)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Oh. ''[pause, one of the trolls says something to her]'' Oh, eso es muy sexy. (That is very sexy.)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Ohhhh. Te gusta. Te gusta muchísimo, (You like it. You like it a lot)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> La verdad, si. (To tell you the truth, yes)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Me amos mis amigas muchísimas. Sons muy bueñas! (I love my friends (feminine) a lot. They are very good.) [Correction: Amo a mis amigas muchísimo. Son muy buenas.] <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Oh, eso es tan cool en español! Muy bueno! (That's so cool in Spanish! Very good)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Muy bueño (very good)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Aha, exacto. (it is!)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]'' Okay, that's good. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Well, I going down, okay?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Okay, you're going down- by the way, let me ask ya Cassie, do you ever- you've uh- you've actually met uh Sarah May in person, haven't you? <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Not. She's on Internet.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Okay. That's cool- but anyway uh- you got- you d- you have my Wii number, uh- you can reply the email with your Wii number and it'll be registered on the Wii network. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[very haltingly]'' Yes. So. Cool. Talk with you Chris. You are so cool. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Heh. Uhhhh. You flatter me. Tú me flatteray. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[Weak laugh]'' Well, see you. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[In his 'baby voice']'' Adiós. ''[sigh]'' <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós, bebé.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós, chiquita bonita. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>[Pause as audio cuts out]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -it again. <br />
<br>[Another pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So anyway, Chris. I've been working on Rabbichoso for a day and uh- I was just wonderin' like, it's- it's supposed to compete with the Sonichu, you know? If you weren't aware of that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhhh. I grabbed onto d- grabbed onto g I- grabbed onto the... that gist. I'm aware- I'm aware of the gist of the theory. Uh. I'm aw- I'm aware that you're- that you're tryin' to compete. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know what competition does. It's drives uh- it drives consumer interest- Well that's why you know- It's great. You have to compete with high quality things. ''[muffled]''- that's why I'm trying to help. You know, compete. Just so you're aware of this, OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I see. -see. <br />
<br>[Pause]<br />
<br />
===Rabbichoso And Animu===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris we've been ge- been getting uh threatening images from the Pickle Man. Did you s- did you see the left? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I've not heard from the Pickle Man in lo- in a long time. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Apparently there are multiple ones because this one is, uh, not a darkie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh-huh. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> It's good that they're leaving you alone now. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Seems like they found more easier targets. Seeing as how you became [[Navy|saltier]].<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh. You know I originally got that line- quote from an e- ep- episode of ExCel Saga. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> From what?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> ExCel Saga.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Oh, ExCel Saga. Oh, yeah, that's a good anime.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> AIII I-Falazzo! (''He means [[ScotPalazzo|Il-Palazzo]]'')<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, have you ever seen two animes, ''[muffled]'' and Schooldays?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I have not seen either of those. I like Steel Angel Kurumi as well.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, how much Japanese do you know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only a little bit. I'm not totally fluent. I can say that with all honesty. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something unintelligible, not quite Japanese]''<!-- It sounds like he's saying "You say you can't- can you speak with me?" in CHINESE. --><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Huh?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Never mind, you won't understand it.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[unclear] Chris-Chan. Genki desu-ka?''<br />
<br />
===Chris Could Kill Clyde===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, I just wanted to say, uh, you're doing a good job, like, keeping calm even though Clyde is here. I mean u- I thought you'd be, like, more angry at him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm being calm with you guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> -I would have been choking him by now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I'd have kicked his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Preach to the choir. Pr- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I'd make him choke on a pickle if it were up to me.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You guys can't touch me otherwise I'd kick all your asses. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, bring it.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris could kick Clyde's ass anytime.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Let's see Chris do it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Bring it to me any day of the week and I'll definitely show him a hard- day's night. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah I think you could kick his ass.<br />
<br>[Trolls and Clyde talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Sings]'' -been a hard day's night...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -never mind, just...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean that as a- meant that as in I would beat... him up. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Kick his ass?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm very strong. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. I'm gonna see you later, OK?<br />
<br>''[Unison of goodbyes]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> OK see ya. Thank you so much Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[ignoring his fans]'' Yeah I can- I can lift about my weight. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Like um- if Clyde were right in front of you, what would you do to him?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Like, what kind of style of fighting do you have?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, shut up.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I gotta know my competition. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Personal- in the physical offense. ''[sigh]'' I would definitely be giving you so much physical pain. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's not a s- that's not a style. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I would beat you up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He deserves it man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, that's still not a style...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He uses fisticuffs. He's a gentleman. Gentleman fisticuffs. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Whatever, I'll just see-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Stop arguing and just-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ''[Over previous troll]'' I mean, if he did that to my sweetheart I'd fucking kill him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well. He's not- he's not going to come over and kill me, I know that. He doesn't have the money. [pause] You know I'm surprised that you're mad here. You're much kinder in person I thought you- Now I'm just expecting you at my door anytime, just waiting for you to stand here with an axe or something. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Knives are too messy. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Ah, now a sword- sword's are usually better.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What about poison?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Poison's good, poison's good.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde, what- do you want him to beat your ass?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I was just expecting it, you know.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, you know what's another thing? I would definitely not tell you how I would be hurting you, but I would definitely give you a who- big amount of pain. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, he's gonna keep you guessin'!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he deserves it. After everything he's done-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Muffled by troll]'' -going to kill me, I'd like to know. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I'm just going to let you cover in- worry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh so you're never going to show up, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Oh yes I will show up. But you just won't be expecting it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't even know where I live, do you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Find out!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Maybe I should give you my address. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, you should track him down and kick his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> But I'm going to leave you guessing too...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Defend Panda's h- Panda's honor.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, hi Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> 'sup Julie.<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br>''[Everyone talks over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde's A Dick===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I notice her mic doesn't work. But still I'm just letting her know that- acknowledge her presence. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're doing well staying calm even though Clyde's here.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, Clyde's a total dick.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Fucker.<br />
<br>''[Rustling]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I mean, he's taken over everything. The IRC. This. I can't- no one can stop him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' -over there, so...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll:'''</font> I- I like Rabbichoso.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Of course you do. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll''':</font> It's funny. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I will not offer any new comment on it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, OK. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, when can we expect the next Sonichu to be released.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, we've been eager.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It'll be soon. It will be soon.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah just ignore Clyde man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean if you're going to put a hard date on it, you'd better deliver your promise. If you don't, I'll strike harder. That's all I'm saying.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. You're saying if I don't set a date, you're gonna...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no. I'm saying don't make promises you can't keep. Don't make promises you can't keep.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He'll choke you with his medallion bitch!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who the hell do you think you are?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I agree with Cogs over there. Maybe you should do just a page a day, not release all at once. Keep his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you telling him this when he hates you?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm giving him suggestions man, OK? OK?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Only thing he's gonna suggest to you is 'shut the fuck up'!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, seriously man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It's alright. <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Penny Arcade's slow.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh you mean like Penny Arcade or 8-Bit Theater or MegaTokyo?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah like they're just boring. Then they became kind of sellouts.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Country Cookin===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Chris, where's your favorite place to eat?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. Can't really say uh- but I like country cookin'. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> What's country cooking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh no G's in the sto- no G's in the name by the way, no G. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah what's country cooking? I'm not familiar with that.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's like uh- som- something like Golden Corral. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But Golden Corral is a national franchise.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh Chris, how are your parents?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> They're OK.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br>[Long pause]<br />
<br />
===Sex Is Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I've got a sug- another suggestion. Now be quiet all of you cause I know you hate me. Just- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, Chris hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well don't defend him. He can defend himself OK? He's a man. But whatever-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let him speak.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm suggesting that- you go on and on about this sex stuff but you've never gotten laid, have you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I like to put myself in the imaginative situation that I'd like to be in and the sexual stimulation. So I can be ready for [[ego|myself]] for when I do actually have my first time.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well my first time was- I'll just say that it's terrible, OK? I didn't know what I was doing, she didn't know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let me guess, you prematurely ejaculated?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no, it's not like that you don't know what to do. Every woman's told me OK? You can't prepare-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Clyde]'' First time's always awkward...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -I learnt that mistake a while back, OK whatever. OK, you just- you can't prepare for your first time. You might as well just have a really bad first time so you learn from your mistakes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm not trying to defend Clyde or anything, but yeah it's kinda true. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Hmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The girl I first fell in love with is the girl I'm married to right now. Samantha just changed my world. But marriage does get boring.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Tips To STAY STRAIGHT===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I know how you say how important it is to stay straight, um- I'm having trouble staying straight, do you have any suggestions?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Watch a bunch of pornography with uh- with naked women. OK, a lot of naked women.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That happened to me one time...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, I have this friend I play video games with, is that gay? He's male by the way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry could you- I'm sorry could you repeat that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I have this guy I'm friends with he always comes over to my house to play video games. Is that gay? I'm kinda scared. You know? I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Hmm. Is he making any advances towards you? Personally. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I dunno how to tell. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Like uh sit- does he always sit next to you when he's playing games. Playing video games.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Yeah he usually does. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I see. Hmm. My- well- my suggestion in that case, would be to keep a heavy distance between you and that guy. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he meant anything gay by it though. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he means anything like- gay about it. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well, still- it's always best to find out- you can ask him. Don't be afraid to ask him. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> What would you do in this situation?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well if he said yes then I would uh- basically- let me think about that a moment. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you have any friends who're are like, guys?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only acquaintances and only a few of them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you play video games with people or anything? Do they come over to your house?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. No.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I remember-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> ''[Cuts Polly off]'' I'm just worried I might be gay or something. I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You probably are Falsion, but that's OK. No, look dude. It's okay to be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Leave him alone! Leave him alone! He's straight!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Why?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Hey, let's have a calm conversation here. Let's not have any fights.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br>''[Trolls speak over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I've been reading the Sonichu comics and man, they are page-turners! Seri- I was on- I was on the edge of my seat for a while. I ju- I couldn't- I couldn't- you know. Just had to read and read.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Thank you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, can I be your friend? I know I'm a guy. I don't mean anything gay by it. Can I be your friend? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. I dunno.<br />
<br />
===A Wild Snorlax Appears===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Do you want any hotdogs?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I'm OK. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> No?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I was talking with my mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I was wondering if I could be your friend.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I h- heard you only like, you only like to be acquaintances. With guys. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, ummm. Let's just pretty much leave it at acquaintance. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hello Mrs. Chandler. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> She can't hear you, I'm wearing my earphones.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Listen, I'm not gay. I don't- you know- yeah. Never mind.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I mean- I mea- I-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What do you have against gay people? I'm serious to hear this. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's just unnatural and it's against God's will. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, it's not like it's a choice. You can't change who you are like- you're a creative guy but I mean they're just gay. They can't change that. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm just answering a few questions mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You don't have to answer. Nobody's payin' you to do that.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yes they are.<br />
<br>''[shuffling sounds, clanging]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> It ain't none of their business no-way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I wouldn't be asked questions like that by employers or anybody. Don't tell people what you d- what you think. Keep that to yourself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris what's hap- what's happening?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, obviously, my mother is offering her input.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Tell her you're just talking to some friends. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' I don't need no back talk from somebody on the other end of the phone.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear you, Mom. Hmm. Hmm. <br />
<br>''[scraping sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> These- these idiots don't have any brains or- they don't have any idea this way or that.<br />
<br>''[more banging, clanging and tumbling sounds. Sounds like washing up]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Is right now a bad time right now? I mean-<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Pixelblocks, Pixelblocks!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Someone's saying "Pixelblocks." <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you saying [[Pixelblocks]]?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>''[Chris's mom has been singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful singing voice, Chris.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[Audio cuts back in]'' -all the anxiety, causing you stress.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, well sometimes they don't; they can be peaceful.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Well, your mom and dad get the crappy end of the stick.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm, a lot of us do.<br />
<br>''[more clattering sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Yeah, just like this nasty mess over here that you guys left that I got to clean up.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm. ''[Audio cuts]'' -Yeah, I took care of my bills. I mean, not completely, but I took care of them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> What about going to, uh, Redmond?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> We! (Wii?) <br />
<br>[unintelligible, windows beeps]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[laughing]'' Yeah, sweetheart pool.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Mmhmm. ''[laughing]'' Like the other side of the pillow.<br />
<br>''[someone sighing. Clanging noises return after short absence]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' ...is all, I mean, living with your parents is okay bad-in today's bad economy, but at 26, come on. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Shut up, you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I'm being nice.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde isn't so bad a guy. He does bad things, but he's pretty cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah he's reformed. He's seen the error- Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How- how could he do that to Sarah? I mean- That's not right.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah. Well, that's like Luke... That's like Luke and Laura from General Hospital. I know that's like, before y'all's time, but, um... Luke was a rapist and she-he raped Laura and then, like, a few months later they get married. So... ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, I believe Clyde was trying to make amends from his past actions.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, but Chris, can you uh- can you forgive him?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Random Troll:'''</font> ''[whispering]'' White whale, holy grail! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Can you forgive a small-dicked Asian? Just a thought.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He's not Asian! <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm half-Asian, okay? My parents ''[unclear]'' I don't really wanna go into it. It's too bo-boring for you people. But this is why I ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you there? Just makin' sure, buddy.<br />
<br>''[clattering]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Move out.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Another Troll''':</font> Well, how do I do that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi there, my kitty. ''[In baby voice]'' Yes, there's a pretty kitty.<br />
<br>''[Someone speaking with a voice-synth]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hang on a second. I've got, like, a thousand different... Oh, Crass, why'd you do that?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Because. You can unban him but, yeah. I'm not gonna friggin' stand for that. <br />
<br>''[Sound of a vacuum cleaner]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> I (m j d?) do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I heard the "g" word.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um, is that a vacuum cleaner?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Yeah, sounds like it is.<br />
<br>[Trolls speak but are drowned out by vacuum]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ...room or something.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I think the vacuum cleaner... <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If that's the government trying to do some kind of thing, then my name's Rusty Shackleford.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's a loud fan.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I have a fan above my stove, too.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Hey... I do, too.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Wait- wha- wait. You-you-you're in the kitchen? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Me too.<br />
<br>''[possibly Sonic game sound effects]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmhm? Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I'm pretty sure it's already asked, but I didn't catch the answer. When can we expect the next Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I-I-I told you my suggestion of releasing a page a day or something. I mean, it's a pretty good one. It-it-it allows for a good time. Finish a page a day. You upload it. You know? It's very good. Works very well.<br />
<br>''[Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh. I mean- you guys keep asking when he's going to finish it but I wonder how many pages are going to be in the new one? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> The last one was like, thirty. Just release it over the span of a month. Works fine. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...go up to ninety thousand...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[mutters something]''<br />
<br>''[Sound of Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Down by the river...side.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful voice, Chris.<br />
<br>''[clattering, typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[unclear, repeating the same two phrases]'' Gone down by the river, down by the water side, down by the riverside. Down by the waterside. Down by the riverside.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember ''[unclear]''<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -I'm hungry myself.<br />
<br>''[some kind of alarm sounding]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Then go eat.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I already ate.<br />
<br />
===Anime And Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I wonder what anime Chris watches nowadays. There's not many on television but do you still watch Japanese cartoons? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[In a bad accent]'' Kawaii desu ne. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I want to watch Shuffle. He said it was very good. He said it was sad. I don't know if I wanna watch- I don't like sad stuff. I like to be happy when I watch anime.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, and um, do you watch stuff like Bleach and um Code Geass or Naruto or something?<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I'm glad to hear that Shuffle isn't sad. I'm definitely going to watch it sometime.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um, yeah Chris that was a good call on Naruto. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah there's a lot of people who don't like it much either. Too popular.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But please. Please. Hope. ''[audio cuts out briefly]'' Uh, Chris, please consider When They Cry.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Ooh, I saw that one. It was a really good series.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, I know; that was good, like- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah. Both seasons of it. <br />
<br>''[Windows beeps, voices overlapping]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I could link you to Season One if you want. Yeah, Samantha got me into that. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...you'll give it a try, Chris. It's a very, very good series.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Hm. Hey, Julie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...lots of ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Watch Shuffle. You got the six episodes of Shuffle or... Which o- which anime? I'm sorry. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh and JoJo's Bizarre Adventure is also cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I really liked JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. Very ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Za warudo!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah, I think Shuffle is quite all right. I like Heidi. She's sweet and loyal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> That's a good one. One of my favorites is Black Lagoon.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris have you ever seen La Blue Girl?<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other about different anime]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, uh, Chris can I, my, uh, I don't know if it's all right, but, like, could you like, give me an email sometime? I could, uh... recommend you to... this anime that... Polly and... Julie like to watch. They're quite- they... Oh, C-and Cogs has recommended such great anime. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[talking to his mother]'' Yeah? That's ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> As well as Julie-Julie's the person that got me into anime.<br />
<br />
===People Love Poketunes===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> -we can go into this later cause I got my headphones on. And, Mom, you know what something else? They liked your singing.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> What? I don't sing.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> That's my laugh; that's my laugh. They couldn't hear me. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They heard you. Singin'. Just now.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I can't sing!<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I'm tone deaf. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They just heard you singing, and liked your voice.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay. Did you write checks for all those bills and pack everything ''[unclear]''?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yes, Mother, I did.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You're not telling me no story?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm not telling you no story.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> OK. It's important [''inaudible''] did you pay them?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, I paid that one. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay, you have to be honest with me, 'cause, see, you're settin'...<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm being honest, I'm being honest.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> How you respond to what [we] talk about. You say you ought to something and you don't do it then that's gonna change my ideas ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay... I'll be sure to pay the remaining differences next month.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> No, this month.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I know but I couldn't pay them all with 90 dollars so there's still some left ''[sound cuts]'' ...oh, you're cooking them up here, okay, that's why you turned the fan on over the stove.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br>''[Trolls rejoice and mock Momma Chandler]''<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 1|Mumble Chat 1]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 3|Mumble Chat 3]]|}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Spanish]]<br />
==Links==<br />
*[https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBOVVDS0JtSDNvMWs Download]<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_2&diff=163019Mumble 22012-09-26T23:23:59Z<p>Irisviel: /* Clyde's A Dick */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{Articleofthenow}}<br />
[[Image:0839-MomDesi.JPG|thumb|right|180px|In Mumble 2, a Wild [[Barbara Chandler|Snorlax]] appeared.]]<br />
<br />
'''Mumble 2''' is the second [[Mumble]] chat that took place on 4 [[February 2009]]. More than an hour long.<br />
<br />
This is a more organized Q&A type chat than [[Mumble 1]]. Questions from [[Clyde]] about [[sex]] in the [[comic]] and interesting tidbits about how Chris believes sex is the same as romance. This is pretty hard hitting, with stuff like how Chris is into [[McDonald's|fast food]] yet he's against tobacco. A lot of drama involving Clyde.<br />
<br />
Length: '''1:49:17'''<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
<br />
===Notes===<br />
* Chris doesn't like Clyde because he stole his sweetheart.<br />
* Audio cuts out for a minute before Chris says: "...HYMEN!" (You broke her hymen)<br />
* Trolls claim [[Panda]] is with Clyde, Chris wants to hear her voice, they say she's busy<br />
* 'She and I WERE very close'<br />
* Chris didn't have $400-$800 to go and see Panda; claims he got this number from an airport website recommended by [[Miyamoto]]<br />
* Insists on [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] being in ''[[Animal Crossing]]''<br />
* Doesn't want to talk about his deal with them<br />
* Insists that he doesn't have to turn down his radio since his voice is louder (''it is horribly loud in the mic'')<br />
* Panda gave Clyde all of the sites, etc.<br />
* [[Sarah]] is going to be with Clyde, which Chris wants to deny<br />
* These motherfuckers keep talking over each other<br />
* Calls a troll's critique crap<br />
* [[Bubbles]] must be aroused, she isn't wet all the time<br />
* Bubbles is 90% water so does sperm just swim around forever? NO<br />
* Clyde: This is a children's comic, why so much sex?<br />
: '''Chris:''' It is romance. My best artwork is when they're making out 'romantic moments', drawn in protest to trolls. Shows that [[Rosechu]]s have vaginas, not [[duck]]s.<br />
* Admits to maybe going overboard<br />
* Trolls try to reason with him about the [[ED]] article: There wouldn't be an article if he didn't react like he does.<br />
* Trolls say that TV-Y7 means NO SEX but Chris points to romantic anime that have making out (cartoons are for kids, whatever the content).<br />
* Trolls talk about Japan being less strict about those things<br />
* Everyone gets to vote in [[CWCville]], even if they're [[Niggos|black]].<br />
* Got his idea from [[Mary Poppins]].<br />
* Troll tries to give historical background about cough medicine putting kids to sleep. Chris insists it was the lullaby that put them to sleep.<br />
* Discussion about Chris, 'gay message' sent by a troll<br />
* He calls Clyde a scoundrel<br />
* BELIEVE HIM HE IS STRAIGHT<br />
* Chris tries to speak Mexican at 20:50<br />
* Mexican speaks Mexican to him... he replies in Menglish<br />
* [[4-cent_garbage]] is located in Mexico<br />
* Someone says that he needs to improve his Mexican<br />
* Chris is against smoking, CWCville is smoke and alcohol free<br />
* Rehash of why [[tobacky]] is bad, his position on it, alcohol=bar fights<br />
* Chris's dad smoked and had several bypasses, has a pacemaker and has had heart attacks<br />
* Mention of his hair cuttings for his fans<br />
* Chris was doing math in his head, got in car crash.<br />
* Chris has taken college level math. Took trigonometry.<br />
* Trolls gang up on Clyde for stealing Panda<br />
* Time will tell when Chris will make the money he would have in the Nintendo deal<br />
* Trolls bash Clyde for his pot smoking <br />
* Chris doesn't watch news because it's bad news =(<br />
* Bashing of the Mexican<br />
* Chris can type 30 to 100 WPM, but can't type and talk at the same time<br />
* Chris says [[PSN]] is free though Clyde(?) points to the $1,000 Chris spent on PSN<br />
* Chris has been typing for 15 minutes now and it is VERY loud<br />
* Chris has been busy IRL therefore the comic release doesn't have a date<br />
* Someone points to nudes on [[YouTube]].<br />
* He does not have it on the YouTube, but he isn't going to take it anymore.<br />
* Claims some of the photos are photoshopped.<br />
* Clyde offers help to take ED page down.<br />
* Chris denies taking those pictures, doesn't want to talk about it, making him uncomfortable.<br />
* Some of the pictures are real. When questioned which ones are fake, Chris can't answer.<br />
* Chris hates Harry Potter because it was in competition with [[Pokémon]]!<br />
* Chris is too stressed to read Vivian's [[A Girl Who Brought Down the World|book]], but he likes the cover!<br />
* Polly, who has been talking the whole time is confronted by Chris who thinks she is a guy. Polly is upset. Chris apologizes.<br />
* [[Jimmy Hill]] has launched his Sonichu show<br />
* More Mexican talk at 55:10<br />
* Chris giggles and sighs happily when Cassie, another Mexican, compliments him and when she leaves he says 'Chiquita Bonita'<br />
* Rabbichoso talk (Sonichu.info)<br />
* Classic trolls are leaving Chris alone.<br />
* Chris likes Steel Angel Kurumi (''quote from [[Wikipedia:Steel Angel Kurumi|Wikipedia]]: often classified as ecchi due to the focus on fanservice and panty shots'')<br />
* Chris claims to be very strong, could beat Clyde up. Says he would show Clyde a [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force|Hard Day's Night]], and would give Clyde pain.<br />
* ShinyMarshtomp makes an appearance? Likes Rabbichoso<br />
* Chris likes to eat at [[Country Cookin]] (''like Golden Corral'')<br />
* Chris likes to imagine his first time. <br />
* Clyde says the first time is awful, Chris said it was because Clyde prematurely ejaculated<br />
* Watch porn with naked women to cure your gay<br />
* Guys sitting next to you = gay coming on to you<br />
* Falsion has been in the chat room and is afraid he is gay<br />
* A wild Snorlax appears<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
<br />
===Waiting for Chris===<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I can't wait to hear Chris! I'm a huge fan!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, goddamn these noodles are fantastic. Man, I wish I could eat like this everyday.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Have you eaten the rice balls?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no. These are noodles. These are-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Fan-fucking-tastic.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now they're all gone, it's fantastic, you know?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Sweetangie is Chris. Or, we think so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's definitely not the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm disappointed there's so many impostors out there. Kinda my fault, but, you know, if it weren't- ''[unintelligible]'' -hard to come by.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His mic was working last time he was here, just fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He usually capitalizes his words, like in every sentence.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is- I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Is it set to push to talk or something?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You better get us your email address Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah its push to talk. It's called push to talk. It's fantastic ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, just have him set it to voice activity. It works so much better that way.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Aww, he left.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> You guys are fucking idiots.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other again]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You guys scared him off by being guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, you fucking jackasses. Nice going.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Was that even the real...?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yes, that was the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He's too much of a pussy to talk.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, cause you scared him, or some- No, or he's too stupid to be.<br />
<br>''[Trolls Laugh]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Arrives===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Chris arrives, with radio playing loudly]'' Hello.<br />
<br>''[Trolls all greet him]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, now-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Why haven't you got your microphone working?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't know why my microphone [is] messed up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry, but we had an impostor here before.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm registered. I've got myself registered now. So, uh, hopefully-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> That's probably why. It had to like, uh- calibrate.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Well, I'm calibrated now.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So, Chris, have you seen Rabbichoso, it's fantastic.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't give a crap about your stupid pencil sketch.<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am not listening. I do not have to listen to ''you''.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Why, I'm not understanding [inaudible]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well for one thing,and I'll say it on here, you stole my sweetheart!<br />
<br>''[Cutout continues]''<br />
<br />
===PandaHalo, Trip to Redmond and Animal Crossing===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You broke her hymen!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I know it's a terrible mistake, but I plan to make it up to her. I'm getting married and uh- I'm doing the things I should do.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh and another thing, if she is really over there with you now, then put her on the mic. Please.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> She's not- He never said-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, Chris, she's very busy, OK. She's very busy.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's not over here right now. Okay? So lets drop it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, fine. Well could you tell her to please send me a message lettin' me know, for sure, so I can know- so I can know to-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' I'll let her know whatever you want, but it's her life. She doesn't have to send you a message. You failed her. You failed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' She and I were very close.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If you we're so close, then why didn't you go?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' Because I had- Aw, hang on a second. How do I- oh, that's right. This thing. Right. Mmm. Hold on a sec. Oh yeah, because I did not have four to eight hundred dollars!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It doesn't cost that much to go cross-country man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes it does. I know, I saw it on an airport website. Where I was be- Where I was- recommended to me by Mr. Miyamoto.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, you can drive there. It's not that hard.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened with that? I thought, um, didn't you have a deal with them or something? I heard a rumor that your characters were going to be in Animal Crossing.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, they are in Animal Crossing. And I did- and I do- I did have a deal with them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened though?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' I'd rather not say.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Radio, Clyde and Criticism===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, why don't you turn down the TV? It's hard to hear you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Annoyed sigh]'' I do not have a TV turned on in here.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I can hear it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have a radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I hear something in the background.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Burping throughout sentence]'' Well that's the- that would b- the radio. And it is not that loud.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But it shows up pretty well on your microphone mic. With due respect.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But still, my voice is louder than the radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Ah goo- ahh given.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh, Chris? Uh, when are you going to do the new Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something over Polly]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' Uh, I'll answer Polly's question. I'm not sure. It's, uh, it's in progress right now, I'm drawing it up.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I can't wait to read it!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Well, we'll see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Listen, Clyde kind of has admin on here, so we can't really do anything about him. So, yeah. I don't know.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Hard to hear over Chris's radio]'' ...with you guys. I love you guys. Just as much as Chris loves you guys. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I was angry. I was angry. But I'm calm now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't try to hurt any other person from now on.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm doing the best I can. I'm doing the best I can.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have much- I do not have much to say in response to that right now. Because I'm ticked off.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't let him get to you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're no better than he is, if you give in.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris, I just wanted to let you know I'm a huge fan of the comics, and I'm glad you keep doing what you're doing. You're doing a great job, and just keep it up, alright man?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, yeah, I appreciate the, uh, what's the word I'm looking for? The, the, uh- well, the encouraging words. Encouragement. I appreciate the encouragement. Well, there are things, uh- I- er- current events I do not appreciate. I appreciate the positive encouragement.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I can't really do anything. He took over the IRC channel. I used to be the owner. I mean Clyde. He's like taking over everything.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, it was because Panda gave it to me, you know. But anyway, I mean, you can't just listen to encouragement, you've got to listen to criticism, man. Criticisms are what make you better, you learn from your mistakes. You learn from mistakes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Be right back guys, my wife is calling.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I don't- I don't- Tons of people don't like the Rabbichoso art style, but you know, I gotta improve on that. That's something I plan to improve on. There's a lot of criticism in the death of Sonichu, right? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What? What did you just say?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a lot of criticism of Sonichu. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. For a moment there I thought you said something different.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What, what did you think I said? I'm just saying, there are people who like it and people who don't like it. You gotta start taking in those suggestions. You know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. So many things that will be improved upon. But, I just have to hear from Sarah herself that she really is going to be with you, Clyde. I have to hear it from herself. It's one thing to hear it from you and then it's- then on that note, it's just I find it very hard to believe. So I have to hear it from her.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I kinda think that Rabbichoso sucks. I mean, I think it could be funny, but it honestly looks like it's drawn by a kindergartner.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, Sonichu has evolved over the years. You can see that the art's getting better. Rabbichoso doesn't even look like something a beginner would do, honestly. I mean, ''[Interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A whole bunch of crap!<br />
<br>''[Everyone starts talking at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, Sonichu is in color.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I know, I accept his criticism. But you just called it crap! Now that's just rude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have emotions going behind me- uh, behind that opinion.<br />
<br />
===Cassie===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, did you get my message.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Aren't you going to be the gentleman, then? Aren't you gonna be the gentleman?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I just want to ask you, Chris. I'm Cassie's friend. She- she's worried sick about you. Why haven't you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did email her! As a- I- I haven't gotten any re-plies from her. I have emailed her and I have instant messaged her on A.I.M. and Skype. I haven't heard back from her. I don't know what's going on there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> ...you emailed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> When was the last time you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, hang on, I'll check.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris? I have a question. My fa- One of my favorite new characters is, um, Simonla, and like, I also like Zapina as well. Um, are they gonna have bigger parts in the series later on?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, could you repeat that question?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I was wondering if Simonla and Zapina will either have bigger parts in the series later on. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [[Sonichu_10#The_Final_Countdown|Possibly]]. Possibly, but, uh, I can't say for sure. Oh, and, uh, to answer your question, uh- in answer to, uh, I believe, uh, Screwhead, who asked? It was about four days ago. About four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Yeah. Four days ago? Okay, I'll tell her to check it out.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> The last email I sent was about four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> She'll contact you in a while, though.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I'll tell her to check it out and- and thanks Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright. Mm.<br />
<br />
===Bubbles's Pussy and Sex in the Comics===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris? I have a question.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, my favorite character is Bubbles, I kinda liked the, uh, the thing she had going with Blake, where she was kind of keeping the relationship secret. I thought that was kinda clever. I was wondering, uh, she's a water-type, so does that mean that her vagina is always wet, or does she have to be aroused like a normal woman?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, aroused. That's applied for all the, uh, Rosechus there. And also, like, you know, she's not just a water-type, she's also- she's a water- and electric-type, like uh- oh, shoot- What's the name of that one? Originated from Gold-Silver-Crystal series, uh, evolves from Chinchou? Lanturn. And she has, uh, she has Volt Absorb ability.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, Chris, another question following Bubbles. Uh, her body is 90% water, and now this thing about the whole sexual intercourse- about it. Now, don't take this rude, and you don't need to answer me... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...I totally respect your creative work. My wife actually got me into this, uh, show actually. So, what happens is- like, as you know, like, semens are like little fishes in themselves. Would that mean, I mean, would they actually have a route to fly into the egg, in theory, or do they just swim around her whole body, just forever just swimming around.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. The, uh, the internal or- the internal organs uh, for the Rosechus are pretty much the same thing, so I'd say pre- about, uh, as good chance as most any other mammal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, so you mean she's able to control her density a little bit more. She- I understand now. She's able to control more her density from the 90% water. Okay. That pretty much answers it just perfectly. That's been bothering me at work. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I got another question, Chris, about this whole sexual thing. I mean, this is a children's comic, right? Why is there so much sex in it?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. It's called romance, and my- and my- if you'll notice throughout the comics my best pieces of artwork among which were those where dey were kissing and making out. Romantic moments.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a hidden page-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' And because- and because- and because of the tension from, uh, the trolls and Encyclopedia Dramatica, I just felt like doing that in protest against them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, but childre-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' Yes but how is that really a protest? That, you know, you know, are, are you like referencing to the 60's when women burned their bras? That was in protes- That was feminism. Saying that they weren't slaves to men. Do you even understand the whole thing?<br />
<br>''[Multiple voices are heard at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Now, to tell you the truth, I never really thought about, I never really thought about that when I-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Chris]'' Then how is, stripping was, how was that protest-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Jack]'' It shows that they have vaginas and NOT dicks. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well you know the dick thing was the fact that they were just, you know, mocking you. I think you went overboard with that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well maybe I did. Maybe I did. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, you did, because that seems kind of excessive, kind of-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' I don't think they would have even bothered to write about an article about you if you didn't just keep reacting like that.<br />
<br />
===Chris justifies sex in a kids' comic===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I have another question.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The point some of us are trying to make is, if it's TV-Y7 that means there should really be no sex in it at all.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible over other people]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's pretty much incorrect, I mean, uh, there's so many romantic anime that's TV-Y7, and they shoul- they have making out.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, a lot of things in Japan, Japan has stricter standards-not stricter, I mean looser guidelines than America. It's much different.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear ya.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I was just wondering what Bubbles, um, she has a, that water whirlwind attack, I was just curious if you had any plans to make- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Butting in]'' By the way, that was a Whirl- Whirlpool.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font>Yeah, Whirlpool, sorry, sorry, Whirlpool, but do you have any plans to mix an, uh, Electric-type attack with that, since water conducts electricity, right? It could be a very powerful-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah, she did, she did an electric attack amongst the- the walls of that Whirlpool and she let out. In case you didn't know, there's a- little bits of lightning bolts among which-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, oh, I'm sor- I didn't notice that, I'm sorry, I'll go take another look. Thank you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hey Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> You make some pretty sweet Little Big Planet levels.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you.<br />
<br />
===Chris on Benadryl babysitting===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, there's a message from Cogs on the side, it's about, uh, do women not have the right to vote already in CWCville.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, evry- Everybody, no matter what age, no matter what gender or race, everybody has the right to vote in CWCville. Even if they're black.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Then what's up with the "Votes for Women" thing, I was-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Not just vote women, but- ''[interrupted]'' any other ethnicities, and gays?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't understand-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did that- heard it in Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What? Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, man, Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, yeah, that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's a classic. It's my favorite movie of all time.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that movie was, like, based in the 1900s.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but still I- still I agreed with that message there-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Taken out of context, that makes it seem like CWCville's set in the 1960s.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What message? That children should be given cough medicine so they'll go to sleep?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''What?''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that's what women used to do back in- That's what mothers, friggin' nurses and stuff used to do to kids in the 1900s, is give children, like, you know, cough medicine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Cause- cause the medicine- uh, correction, the medicine did not put them to sleep, there was a lullaby, not the cough medicine. They only had to take the cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ...because it rained, before dere, and it was not, and it was to, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Rain means cough medicine doesn't have anything to do with each other. That's not how friggin' germs are spread, or colds are gotten. Colds are gotten through germs, not the rain.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How is cough medicine any different from today's parents that just let their kids watch TV until they fall asleep? I mean, it's just as bad.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well- Cough medicine has a lot to do with the psychological effects of it. Obviously if you get- if you keep giving fre-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Thanks, Samantha, that was delicious.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's my, uh, Samantha-<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, that's we're all saying, cause I've heard that there's a lot of different chemicals in cough medicine. You could pick up a ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I don't even take cough medicine, because I'm not a pussy.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Anyway, I never put any references, I never did any references or plan any references to cough medicine or anything of that sort.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Well, Chris, Cassie says the last e-mail she got from you was on the 17th. How 'bout your being gay? Is that true?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[sigh]'' That wa- That was somebody had- That was Clyde hacking through my e-mail and spammed that to my contacts.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, I definitely did not do that-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You're a scoundrel-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -a slanderous lie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I did not do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Whoa-whoa-whoa. Wow. Well, thanks for that. She was worried that you were- that you don't like her.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> You're a scoundrel, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't do that. That was someone else.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I was wondering, because I've heard other news too, I was really hoping that you weren't gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Believe me, I'm straight.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I'll take your word for it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you. And, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Cogs- Cogs got a way- she showed us that, okay? I mean, you only ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br />
===Chris's fail-riffic Spanish===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So, Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, Screwhead's from Mexico. I heard you like Spanish, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hola, Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You know Spanish, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí. Conoso Mexico. Tomé dos años ''[unclear]'' mi escuela secundaria. (Yes, I know Mexico. I took two years [in, possibly] my secondary school.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has venido en Mexico? (Have you come to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, lo siento? (Uh, I'm sorry?)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has estado en Mexico? (Have you been to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Estoy Mexico? No. (I am Mexico? No.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[slowly]'' Has estado, um, in Mexico. Has venir? (Have you been to Mexico? Have gone?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Uh, no, I hav- no, no tengo pansars. ''[sic]'' (no, I don't have pansars (?))<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I think, uh, I think I meant to say- I'm pretty sure-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Did you just say you don't wear pants?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, no, I was trying to say, ah, I don't have plans to go in Mexico at the moment.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's what I understood what he was saying there.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, did you know that, that 4-cent garbage website is located in Mexico?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> That's why-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, that's why they can't get it shut down.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]'' borders, plus it's cheaper to run sites over there; they have, like, several servers.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wanted to talk to you, but she couldn't make it here, well, and, she wants to be your Spanish teacher, because she says that you've got room to improve your Spanish.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Oh, that Cassie. Yeah, I'm sorry, I thought you were- I got mixed up. Um... Yeah, um, I'm sorry, I, uh, I haven't talked to that- I haven't talked to Cassie in a while, but I've been mostly talking to, uh, her gal- her, uh, gal-pal and I'm sure- I'm sure she'd tell you a lot about her...<br />
<br />
===In which the trolls discuss bar fights===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey Chris, how- how does Sonichu keep Rosechu from spending more than a hundred dollars at the mall? I've always wondered how he could manage to do that. I've always had problems with that myself.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That wa- That time at the mall, it was, uh, Kel loaned the credit card. And it's like, yeah- she gave- she gave Sonichu the responsibility of that credit card. She did.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I've always given my advice on cannabis, you should do the ''[unintelligible]'', Cogs Chris, but I think she wants your response.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, one of my friends sent me this picture, and I think you might find it kinda disturbing just because they say it's proof that you're gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Aw yeah, I saw that, that's just a crappy Photoshop.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No, that one doesn't- this one doesn't look Photoshopped at all.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'm not gonna look at it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Oh, you're not? Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, uh, you say you're against smoking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. As a matter of fact, CWCville is a smoke-free, non-alcoholic city.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[partially drowned out]'' That's what we call a totalitarian state...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, and, uh, in the pilot episode with Seth MacFarlane, of, you know, Family Guy? He's always smoking. What do you think about that?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Go smoke.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I just- I just take that with a grain of salt, and, uh, you know, that's what-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, if he can smoke, why can't anyone else? I mean, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Because it causes cancer!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> So does a lot of things.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> It could be a prop pipe.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> In any case, I'm not- in any, in any case I've never done it and I never will.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, but eating too much fast food can give you a heart attack. I mean... so many things are deadly for you.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What about fast food, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> My father used to smoke and he went through a whole bunch of heart attacks. He suffered three- <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Well, I think that might have to do more with his weight.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He suffered through three or four triple bypasses.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I think that's... that's more like a weight issue.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He has a pacemaker!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, eh...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey ya guys, leave him alone. Ya know, my granddad, he smoked most of his life. He quit for 25 years and still died of lung cancer. I mean that's just the way it is. And your body never gets rid of it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, what about ''[pause]'' Chris, what about fast food? That's- that's bad for you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey Chris. Chris, could you do me a favor and send an email to Cassie? She's very worried about you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Yeah sure, I'll send her an email later.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, thanks.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, I've got uh, a certain someone you know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No no.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -she has to, uh, she wants to ask you w- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Also, she said something about some hair.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh yeah. Yeah, that's uh... that's another issue right there. Um, hmmm. I'll talk to her about that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, does, uh, drinking cause cancer?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, but it causes liver dysfunction and likely bar fights and automobile accidents.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, bar fights, but— <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Bar fights!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> -but I don't think that bar fights are that big of a problem.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I think bar fights are awesome.<br />
<br>''[People agree bar fights are awesome]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> But bar fights are bad. I got into a bar fight once and one of my hands got cut and two fingers from my left hand. Bar fights suck.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well, I think that might be more because you're Mexican. Are you sure you didn't lose them picking bo- picking grapes and- or something?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> No, Mexican people are more more- more much macho man; we get into bigger fights. We're more awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No- I think it might be because you got your hands stuck in some machinery when you were out picking in the vineyards.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't know about you guys, but I like- I like having bar fights.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Crashes Due To Math===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't have to be drunk to be in a bar fight or in an automobile accident, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but they increase the likeliness of it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You've been in an autobile— automobile accident, I mean, were you drunk?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I was distracted.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Uh, by what? I mean, it's kinda hard to be dist— you gotta be focused on driving man-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I was doing math in my head.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, math in your— <br />
<br>[Trolls talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> My mind got distracted by being its own calculator.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Are you good at math?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, is that for school?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Are you some kind of savant?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's impossible.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Guys, you're getting ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you like a mathematic genius or something?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> You know some artist people have like superpowers in their head. They can do like geniuses and add really well. ''[interrupted briefly by Jack saying something else about savant]'' Chris you are already an artist. Do you have any like, magical powers?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, I heard autistic people are really good at math. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Well not all the stereo- some of that sounds like stereotypes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[talking over Chris]'' ...it has to do with mental ability; I mean, what's the...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean I don't know- I mean I'm not saying that I'm a total genius. I mean I know- I know enough to get by.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What's the highest level of math you've taken Chris?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> College level.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I mean like algebra, or calculus or...?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. I believe I just did trigonometry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Very impressive.<br />
<br>[long pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So I was wondering. When did you get the CAD degree? I figured it's like a fine arts degree or something? I mean wha-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I designed a whole- I designed buildings and machinery and such along there. I designed the whole CWCVille shopping center.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don't you have a job then?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Your fans would love to see that Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' -I mean use that to design like, actual buildings? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I think I just told you I designed the CWCVille sho-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I don't mean in your comic. I'm just saying-<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde Isn't Popular And Chris Should Program===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well it's a good st-<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I heard you got some nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'll be putting an update on da YouTube soon, but not right now. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking maybe you could like, you know, get a degree in game design and make the Sonichu game? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah man, it's not that hard to learn programming. C++ man.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">''Falsion:'''</font> Clyde, he hates you, why are you talking?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm just giving him some advice, I mean C++ is-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you here? We don't like you. You totally ruined Chris's life.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't ruin his life. He ruined his own life.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yes you did. You've ruined his life. You raped his girlfriend. <br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks at once over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If he was the man he said he was, he'd have gone to Nintendo, made all that money. How- how are you going to make money now Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Time will tell.<br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks again]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, time will tell Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font>''[unclear]'' -need a plan, you know? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking uh, if- uh- would you be interested in getting a degree in game design. Making the game or something? Like if you had to? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Maybe but uh- I still have things to sort out in my real life.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah it's kinda unfortunate what happened with the Nintendo thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah- hang on a second, I'll be right back. Mm- ''[clattering]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So be honest guys am I really that much of a bother. I mean...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah you kind of are.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like a total dickfart.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You realize weed causes cancer? <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I didn't know that. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> And it causes the munchies. You're gonna get fat, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's okay, man, because I work out.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Do you play Guitar Hero standing up?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I play Guitar Hero while on the treadmill. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Will the Sonichu game be a- ''[muffled]'' -or a Wii one?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> It be a Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Wii would like to play. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh. I only got a DS. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I heard you are very good at HTML. Why don't you make a HTML Sonichu game? That would be awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't think you can make a game in HTML.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A- anyway I came back...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hey, Chris? How many courses did you have to take to get that degree in CAD? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -pretty sure you can make a game in HTML-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[speaking over]'' I'm took abo- took about two- took about two years to four years. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, if you can write HTML you can write C++, make your own games. Pretty simple man. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well it's something I'll consider. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde why are you talking to him? He hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm trying to give him some suggestions. I'm not insulting him, OK? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> HTML seems kinda outdated, so to speak. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font>I learn- I took two HTML classes so at least I know how to do- at least I know the ins and outs when it comes to like, workin' on it in the raw data- in the notepad.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> So you don't use Dreamweaver?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I also use Net- also use Netscape composer. <br />
<br>''[Someone starts singing 'Dreamweaver']''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I heard they went bankrupt or something.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't- I don- I don't listen to news because I don't care about bad news. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But that's not bad news that's just safety...<br />
<br>''[Talking over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why you gotta bring this bad vibe in here? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> OK OK I'll chill, I'm sorry it's just my wife- ''[can't hear over Chris typing extremely loud]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris you don't hear about these ones in a while. Like yesterday some guy in my town got run over by a train and he- he died. And that's a really bad thing, you know but you have to hear about it. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yeah but that's because you're Mexican. You Mexicans always play around the train tracks, what's with you? <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No come on, don't be racist.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> It's because Mexicans are stupid. I'm surprised I can use a computer. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' CrassCrab why do you have to be so mean?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> 'Cause my mother was raped by a Mexican. And I'm part Me- ''[muffled]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry man.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> That isn't fair to take it out on every other Mexican out there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His rule applied to millions. Just ignore him.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No I'm not my mother was raped by Mexicans.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> CrassCrab I'm tired of listening to you, get out of here. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Not all Mexicans are like that we- we- I am a nice Mexican guy. Not all Mexican guys are- ''[drowned out by typing]'' -Black guys are the people you should fear.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't get me started on them. But that will be another day. Cause I'm sick of hearing bad news.<br />
<br />
===Chris Types Fast (And Hates Hex-Box)===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris what are you uh- typing there?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm typing a email. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> How many words can you type? How fast can you type? Sounding fast there. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhh say about uh- sorta between thirty and a hundred. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's quite a good range man. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like "The Flash", minus the red jump-suit.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh Chris um- I was wondering if- ''[unclear]'' -game with Nintendo, would it be uh a Wii game or a DS game or both. I only own DS and I don't have any money for a Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[overlapping]'' Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wii, DS and Pla- hopefully uh- possibly uh, PlayStation 2 or 3. Never on [[Hex_Box|Hex-Box]]. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> When you gonna do this shit?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Why don't you like the Hex-Box? I mean I have an Xbox, I would love to play online with you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'd like to say this. Before Chris says anything about that I just wanna say that today my wife came home from the mall shopping for her usual clothes, that Gucci purse I had to buy for her. You know what she came home with? I wanted a PS3 but you know what she gave me was a frickin' Xbox 360. The Elite one? ''[someone speaks over]'' I know, I kept telling her like "Honey this isn't what I wanted. I wanted the PlayStation 3 so I can play LittleBigPlanet, Metal Gear Solid and Sonic Unleashed" <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You can put Sonic Unleashed on the Hex Box as well as Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Too whiny to make out]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Nintendo just- rejected your offer? Cause I- I heard a rumor that there was going to be a Sonichu game or something. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris uh. Cassie wants you to send her your Wii number so she can talk to you on the Wii. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright uhhhhh. I'll get- have to get my Wii number now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Send it to her in an email please.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they completely hate Sony. And they hate Microsoft as well. I mean this guy, Reggie? He always talks about kicking their ass and stuff. He's kinda crazy. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I know. Reggie's very mean he never brought out Mother 3 to America. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah I wanted to play that game.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talked over]'' -I'm tellin' you guys. Reggie's just a great ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Like what?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can- I can't say anything OK but... you'll see. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah so I don't think like if you got the deal with Nintendo I don't think they'd put it on like mu- like anything else but the Wii or DS. Yeah, cause that Reggie guy he frickin' hates Sony. And Microsoft. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wasn't he also the head of VH1?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or Pizza Hut.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. What are your favorite places to eat at? <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember um Peter Moore he used to - ''[unclear]'' -but before that he was with Sega when Dreamcast was out. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yup. Let me type this email please. I mean y'all keep talking I'll just listen. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's no reason to hate the Xbox. To be honest.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or um- Chris um- do you wanna release your game on Nintendo and on Sony. If you do talk to somebody like EA or something, you can like do um- multi-console thing like a third party thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[busy typing]'' Hmm. Well it's all to think about. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I mean Sega does third party now so um- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah well I'm gonna keep typing this email here. Y'all keep talking. <br />
<br>''[Sound of Chris typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's true, it's true. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Chris I wanted to tell you that Cassie's going to be here any- any second so you can talk to her. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Hm. ''[continues typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Don't you care about her? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[annoyed]'' I'm typin' da email to her right now! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah um 360 is pretty bad it um- red-rings all the time. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> I've had mine over two years. The same one. And it has not red-ringed yet. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Dude you have to pay $50 just so you can play online. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[echoing]'' Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah it's bullshit.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah it's totally free on PlayStation. And Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris. Chris. No, no, no, no, I gotta talk about this. [long pause] Chris...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupting]'' I get less connection problems myself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can't let you get away with this Chris. You spent over $1000 on the PlayStation Network. OK? And you say you can't afford $50 for the Xbox? Terrible reason. That's a terrible reason. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, um, Cogs I had a friend of mine whose red-ringed a lot of times. She did not like it at all. She got herself a PS3 instead. <br />
<br>''[Chris is STILL typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I heard that like- the PS triple eats up a lot of energy and like- has cau- has like- burned houses down. Cause it messes up the- no but the PS3 really- <br />
<br>''[More of Chris typing then audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So when's the next comic coming out Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I can't say. I don't have a date for it right now. I've been busy with the- with real life and such. You know getting the s- getting the website back up and all that. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh but I've been waiting so long. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I gotta tell you something Chris. ''[unclear]'' -to the trolls but I haven't done anythin' myself. It's run off into splinter groups doin' stuff to you. Ever since the Panda thing, I haven't done anything to you man. Everybody's been running round doing things. I have no control anymore. So I'm back here. This is why I'm back here. Do you understand? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. I hear you.<br />
<br />
===Nudes On YouTube===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I hear you got some uh- nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> What? <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hear you got some nudes on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Dudes?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Nudes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> That's what I thought- I have nothing na- I have nothing like that on the nu- on the YouTube. I've nothing like that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh someone posted the pics from the ED page. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> They're just tryin' ta get on- they're just tryin' ta get on my nerves again. But I'm not gonna let 'em.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Did you take those pictures or what? Where'd they come from?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Uh, are they Photoshopped?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah most of- Yes. Most of them are Photoshopped.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I can help you with ED. Chris I can help you with ED.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You can see the neck and the body doesn't quite match up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, Chris. Cassie's just arrived. She's just a little nervous about talking to you, but she's gonna talk to you soon. Is that OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I just got one quick comment. Look, the ED people were in contact with me, but I've lost contact with them. But I know you can delete that page permanently. I'm tryin' to help you man. You can get that page down forever. Even the entire site. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What, after you raped um- Sarah? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I'm trying to make amends. So let me do my business. All right?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's too late to make amends. Look what you did.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look what Chris has done. Look at what Chris has done, okay? ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um. Cogsdev said she had a look at the data, they have it up in Image editing software.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah. Well...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I don't know what to tell you there. <br />
<br>''[Several trolls speak at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Doesn't that mean they're real? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I don't think so. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You don't think so?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Well, did you take them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Then where did those pictures come from? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who took those?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I don't know. And I'd rather not talk about that anymore. It's making me feel uncomfortable.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Are you lying to your fans Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> We don't feel confort- we don't feel comfortable. We're big fans of your work and we don't like being lied to. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I'd like to make a point. It might just be a doppelganger [sic].<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, you know the thing I hate most is lies. I like to spread the truth about you Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You say you're honest, but you're lying to us.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[clearly annoyed]'' Fine, fine. Some those pictures are real. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Some of them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Some of them but not all of them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Like, which ones aren't real?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'd rather not go into detail because I'd rather not look at 'em. Cause uh- ''[interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' -are you ashamed of it?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Do you not like to look in the mirror?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You owe it- you owe it to your fans.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, but- yeah, but- yeah, but upon looking at those it's like ref- it's like reflecting a pe- uh p- a past moment in my life where I- I was played for the fool. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah, by the man in the pickle suit?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh that guy- I hate that guy.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah I saw- he was trolling some other people you know? So you're not alone, Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he took pictures of me like that too...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That guy's an asshole, I hate him.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhhh yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He took pictures of my wife too. Sick bastard. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> He's a peanut.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br>[another pause]<br />
<br />
===Chris Hates Harry===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I just uh- never was fond of it. Ever since it came out, I was never fond of it. ''[unclear as troll speaks over]'' -just like I hate Harry Potter because he's s- he's goin- he's uh- in compe- was in competition against the world of Pokemon. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Well that- that doesn't make sense. But they're two different medias. Pokemon-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah but- yeah but still he-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> -Harry Potter is a book.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah but he poses as competition against them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> That's not really competition. I mean- <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talks over Jack]'' Oh that reminds me about books- Vivi- Vivian wrote a book and sent it to you. You never read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes. I am afraid I- yeah, yeah- I'm uh- I've been uh- so I've been under uh- too much stress between internet and all that. I'll ge- I'll read it, I'll read it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's been waiting for your response for quite a long time.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I like the cover. (pause) Nice cover.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he is right about that. That is a nice cover. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah the book is pretty good- I read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Well I- I will definitely make it a point to uh- read it. Very soon. <br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Audible over the others]'' Did you ever read Twilight?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I've heard th- I've heard Twilight and I've seen the trailer but I haven't seen the movie, I'll wait for it to come out DVD or Blu-ray.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br />
===Random Access Humor Python Style===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh OK, I heard a lot of girls like Twilight. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I see. Hey Polly does your voice sound like that, 'cause it sounds like [[BlueSpike|a guy talking falsetto]]. I mean no personal offense. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> That's not very nice...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm sorry. Believe me I didn't mean any pe- anything personal it's just like, you know- hm- kind- just kinda takes me by surprise a bit, that's all.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I knew a girl like that in high school.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Sounding upset]'' I can't help it if I'm born like this.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I'm- I'm- I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah she's a girl. I saw her pics. She's a girl.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I'll s- I'll take his word for it. I'm sorry I cu- I accused you there.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um. OK. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You know, aut- I mean- let's- it's just uh- you know it's uh- you know it's uh a bit- just a spot of fun. [[Random-access_humor|Stupid humor]]. Monty Python's Flying Circus. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> We know you love that. There's just so many references to it in the comic. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah I d- after they put all of the entire series on PlayStation Network I downloaded the Hamlet episode- that was the one that had uh- Jimmy Hill parodying himself. It also had this funny bit where it was like, you know- ''[in a stupid voice]'' "...and now it's time for The Robinsons, an everyday story about blah-de-blah-de-blah-de-blah. Dum-de-dum-de-dum-de-duhhh-dum-de-dum"- and so on...<br />
<br>''[A troll begins to speak but is interrupted by a very high-pitched Chris]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> "Morning Mrs. Robinson- Morning Mrs. Robinson. Comin' out shoppin'? Oh- you've been shoppin', what did you buy? What's this?-" 'What did you buy this for?'[Trolls laugh over him]'' -It was a bargain!"<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I've heard you do that before. I don't know where. Anyway uh- uhm- Whatever happened to Jimmy Hill? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I haven't heard from him in a long time so just assuming uh- he gave up or uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I think he got a- I think he got a, uh- children's TV program in England.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well he ain't botherin' me, so I'm not worried about him anymore.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Ye- but he's stealing Sonichu. Bastardizing it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah he did but uh- he s- but haven't seen any updates on his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' -profile, he's still doing it.<br />
<br>''[Several trolls talk over each other about him having a TV show]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Fails At Spanish Pt. 2===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' <br />
<br>''[Troll says something more about the TV show, but it's muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wants to say hi. Just forgive her English because she can't speak very well, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> All right. Just sent her the email by the way, just now. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Hey, Chris. It's me, Cassie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi, Cassie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Fine, and you?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm feelin' OK. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Why haven't you emailed me? I was really about-was really worried about you. What's happened? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry. I be- I've bee- I've been busy with the Internet and the stress and all that. I sent ya an email just now go- it's got my Wii number in it so you can add me to your contacts. I've been talking to uh- I've been talking to Sarah lot- quite a bit lately. She's been helping me with uh- updating the Sonichu site, since I've uh- since I'm working on uh- it's re-uploading and such. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Kay, I believe you. I going to check ''[pronounced like 'sheg']'' it, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You're going to where?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[very quietly]'' Check it.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> To check it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> To "shag-it"? Is that the-<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Check the email. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[still doesn't understand]'' Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> I going to check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, check email. ''[Laughs]'' Yeah I'm sorry I tr- I tried to uh- understand but it just kind of messed up a little bit. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don- why don't you two speak in Spanish?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhh. I'm not exactly fluent. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ¿Sabes hablar español, Chris? (Do you know how to speak Spanish?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí, hablo español. (Yes, I speak Spanish)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Oh. ''[pause, one of the trolls says something to her]'' Oh, eso es muy sexy. (That is very sexy.)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Ohhhh. Te gusta. Te gusta muchísimo, (You like it. You like it a lot)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> La verdad, si. (To tell you the truth, yes)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Me amos mis amigas muchísimas. Sons muy bueñas! (I love my friends (feminine) a lot. They are very good.) [Correction: Amo a mis amigas muchísimo. Son muy buenas.] <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Oh, eso es tan cool en español! Muy bueno! (That's so cool in Spanish! Very good)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Muy bueño (very good)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Aha, exacto. (it is!)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]'' Okay, that's good. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Well, I going down, okay?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Okay, you're going down- by the way, let me ask ya Cassie, do you ever- you've uh- you've actually met uh Sarah May in person, haven't you? <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Not. She's on Internet.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Okay. That's cool- but anyway uh- you got- you d- you have my Wii number, uh- you can reply the email with your Wii number and it'll be registered on the Wii network. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[very haltingly]'' Yes. So. Cool. Talk with you Chris. You are so cool. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Heh. Uhhhh. You flatter me. Tú me flatteray. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[Weak laugh]'' Well, see you. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[In his 'baby voice']'' Adiós. ''[sigh]'' <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós, bebé.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós, chiquita bonita. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>[Pause as audio cuts out]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -it again. <br />
<br>[Another pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So anyway, Chris. I've been working on Rabbichoso for a day and uh- I was just wonderin' like, it's- it's supposed to compete with the Sonichu, you know? If you weren't aware of that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhhh. I grabbed onto d- grabbed onto g I- grabbed onto the... that gist. I'm aware- I'm aware of the gist of the theory. Uh. I'm aw- I'm aware that you're- that you're tryin' to compete. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know what competition does. It's drives uh- it drives consumer interest- Well that's why you know- It's great. You have to compete with high quality things. ''[muffled]''- that's why I'm trying to help. You know, compete. Just so you're aware of this, OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I see. -see. <br />
<br>[Pause]<br />
<br />
===Rabbichoso And Animu===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris we've been ge- been getting uh threatening images from the Pickle Man. Did you s- did you see the left? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I've not heard from the Pickle Man in lo- in a long time. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Apparently there are multiple ones because this one is, uh, not a darkie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh-huh. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> It's good that they're leaving you alone now. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Seems like they found more easier targets. Seeing as how you became [[Navy|saltier]].<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh. You know I originally got that line- quote from an e- ep- episode of ExCel Saga. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> From what?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> ExCel Saga.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Oh, ExCel Saga. Oh, yeah, that's a good anime.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> AIII I-Falazzo! (''He means [[ScotPalazzo|Il-Palazzo]]'')<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, have you ever seen two animes, ''[muffled]'' and Schooldays?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I have not seen either of those. I like Steel Angel Kurumi as well.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, how much Japanese do you know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only a little bit. I'm not totally fluent. I can say that with all honesty. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something unintelligible, not quite Japanese]''<!-- It sounds like he's saying "You say you can't- can you speak with me?" in CHINESE. --><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Huh?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Never mind, you won't understand it.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[unclear] Chris-Chan. Genki desu-ka?''<br />
<br />
===Chris Could Kill Clyde===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, I just wanted to say, uh, you're doing a good job, like, keeping calm even though Clyde is here. I mean u- I thought you'd be, like, more angry at him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm being calm with you guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> -I would have been choking him by now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I'd have kicked his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Preach to the choir. Pr- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I'd make him choke on a pickle if it were up to me.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You guys can't touch me otherwise I'd kick all your asses. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, bring it.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris could kick Clyde's ass anytime.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Let's see Chris do it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Bring it to me any day of the week and I'll definitely show him a hard- day's night. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah I think you could kick his ass.<br />
<br>[Trolls and Clyde talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Sings]'' -been a hard day's night...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -never mind, just...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean that as a- meant that as in I would beat... him up. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Kick his ass?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm very strong. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. I'm gonna see you later, OK?<br />
<br>''[Unison of goodbyes]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> OK see ya. Thank you so much Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[ignoring his fans]'' Yeah I can- I can lift about my weight. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Like um- if Clyde were right in front of you, what would you do to him?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Like, what kind of style of fighting do you have?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, shut up.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I gotta know my competition. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Personal- in the physical offense. ''[sigh]'' I would definitely be giving you so much physical pain. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's not a s- that's not a style. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I would beat you up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He deserves it man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, that's still not a style...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He uses fisticuffs. He's a gentleman. Gentleman fisticuffs. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Whatever, I'll just see-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Stop arguing and just-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ''[Over previous troll]'' I mean, if he did that to my sweetheart I'd fucking kill him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well. He's not- he's not going to come over and kill me, I know that. He doesn't have the money. [pause] You know I'm surprised that you're mad here. You're much kinder in person I thought you- Now I'm just expecting you at my door anytime, just waiting for you to stand here with an axe or something. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Knives are too messy. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Ah, now a sword- sword's are usually better.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What about poison?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Poison's good, poison's good.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde, what- do you want him to beat your ass?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I was just expecting it, you know.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, you know what's another thing? I would definitely not tell you how I would be hurting you, but I would definitely give you a who- big amount of pain. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, he's gonna keep you guessin'!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he deserves it. After everything he's done-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Muffled by troll]'' -going to kill me, I'd like to know. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I'm just going to let you cover in- worry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh so you're never going to show up, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Oh yes I will show up. But you just won't be expecting it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't even know where I live, do you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Find out!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Maybe I should give you my address. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, you should track him down and kick his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> But I'm going to leave you guessing too...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Defend Panda's h- Panda's honor.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, hi Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> 'sup Julie.<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br>''[Everyone talks over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde's A Dick===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I notice her mic doesn't work. But still I'm just letting her know that- acknowledge her presence. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're doing well staying calm even though Clyde's here.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, Clyde's a total dick.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Fucker.<br />
<br>''[Rustling]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I mean, he's taken over everything. The IRC. This. I can't- no one can stop him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' -over there, so...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll:'''</font> I- I like Rabbichoso.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Of course you do. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll''':</font> It's funny. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I will not offer any new comment on it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, OK. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, when can we expect the next Sonichu to be released.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, we've been eager.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It'll be soon. It will be soon.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah just ignore Clyde man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean if you're going to put a hard date on it, you'd better deliver your promise. If you don't, I'll strike harder. That's all I'm saying.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. You're saying if I don't set a date, you're gonna...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no. I'm saying don't make promises you can't keep. Don't make promises you can't keep.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He'll choke you with his medallion bitch!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who the hell do you think you are?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I agree with Cogs over there. Maybe you should do just a page a day, not release all at once. Keep his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you telling him this when he hates you?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm giving him suggestions man, OK? OK?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Only thing he's gonna suggest to you is 'shut the fuck up'!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, seriously man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It's alright. <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Penny Arcade's slow.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh you mean like Penny Arcade or 8-Bit Theater or MegaTokyo?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah like they're just boring. Then they became kind of sellouts.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Country Cookin===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Chris, where's your favorite place to eat?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. Can't really say uh- but I like country cookin'. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> What's country cooking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh no G's in the sto- no G's in the name by the way, no G. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah what's country cooking? I'm not familiar with that.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's like uh- som- something like Golden Corral. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But Golden Corral is a national franchise.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh Chris, how are your parents?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> They're OK.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br>[Long pause]<br />
<br />
===Sex Is Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I've got a sug- another suggestion. Now be quiet all of you cause I know you hate me. Just- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, Chris hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well don't defend him. He can defend himself OK? He's a man. But whatever-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let him speak.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm suggesting that- you go on and on about this sex stuff but you've never gotten laid, have you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I like to put myself in the imaginative situation that I'd like to be in and the sexual stimulation. So I can be ready for [[ego|myself]] for when I do actually have my first time.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well my first time was- I'll just say that it's terrible, OK? I didn't know what I was doing, she didn't know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let me guess, you prematurely ejaculated?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no, it's not like that you don't know what to do. Every woman's told me OK? You can't prepare-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Clyde]'' First time's always awkward...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -I learnt that mistake a while back, OK whatever. OK, you just- you can't prepare for your first time. You might as well just have a really bad first time so you learn from your mistakes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm not trying to defend Clyde or anything, but yeah it's kinda true. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Hmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The girl I first fell in love with is the girl I'm married to right now. Samantha just changed my world. But marriage does get boring.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Tips To STAY STRAIGHT===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I know how you say how important it is to stay straight, um- I'm having trouble staying straight, do you have any suggestions?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Watch a bunch of pornography with uh- with naked women. OK, a lot of naked women.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That happened to me one time...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, I have this friend I play video games with, is that gay? He's male by the way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry could you- I'm sorry could you repeat that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I have this guy I'm friends with he always comes over to my house to play video games. Is that gay? I'm kinda scared. You know? I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Hmm. Is he making any advances towards you? Personally. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I dunno how to tell. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Like uh sit- does he always sit next to you when he's playing games. Playing video games.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Yeah he usually does. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I see. Hmm. My- well- my suggestion in that case, would be to keep a heavy distance between you and that guy. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he meant anything gay by it though. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he means anything like- gay about it. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well, still- it's always best to find out- you can ask him. Don't be afraid to ask him. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> What would you do in this situation?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well if he said yes then I would uh- basically- let me think about that a moment. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you have any friends who're are like, guys?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only acquaintances and only a few of them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you play video games with people or anything? Do they come over to your house?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. No.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I remember-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> ''[Cuts Polly off]'' I'm just worried I might be gay or something. I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You probably are Falsion, but that's OK. No, look dude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Leave him alone! Leave him alone! He's straight!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Why?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Hey, let's have a calm conversation here. Let's not have any fights.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br>''[Trolls speak over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I've been reading the Sonichu comics and man, they are page-turners! Seri- I was on- I was on the edge of my seat for a while. I ju- I couldn't- I couldn't- you know. Just had to read and read.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Thank you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, can I be your friend? I know I'm a guy. I don't mean anything gay by it. Can I be your friend? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. I dunno. <br />
<br />
===A Wild Snorlax Appears===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Do you want any hotdogs?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I'm OK. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> No?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I was talking with my mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I was wondering if I could be your friend.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I h- heard you only like, you only like to be acquaintances. With guys. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, ummm. Let's just pretty much leave it at acquaintance. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hello Mrs. Chandler. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> She can't hear you, I'm wearing my earphones.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Listen, I'm not gay. I don't- you know- yeah. Never mind.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I mean- I mea- I-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What do you have against gay people? I'm serious to hear this. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's just unnatural and it's against God's will. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, it's not like it's a choice. You can't change who you are like- you're a creative guy but I mean they're just gay. They can't change that. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm just answering a few questions mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You don't have to answer. Nobody's payin' you to do that.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yes they are.<br />
<br>''[shuffling sounds, clanging]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> It ain't none of their business no-way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I wouldn't be asked questions like that by employers or anybody. Don't tell people what you d- what you think. Keep that to yourself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris what's hap- what's happening?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, obviously, my mother is offering her input.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Tell her you're just talking to some friends. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' I don't need no back talk from somebody on the other end of the phone.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear you, Mom. Hmm. Hmm. <br />
<br>''[scraping sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> These- these idiots don't have any brains or- they don't have any idea this way or that.<br />
<br>''[more banging, clanging and tumbling sounds. Sounds like washing up]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Is right now a bad time right now? I mean-<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Pixelblocks, Pixelblocks!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Someone's saying "Pixelblocks." <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you saying [[Pixelblocks]]?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>''[Chris's mom has been singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful singing voice, Chris.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[Audio cuts back in]'' -all the anxiety, causing you stress.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, well sometimes they don't; they can be peaceful.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Well, your mom and dad get the crappy end of the stick.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm, a lot of us do.<br />
<br>''[more clattering sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Yeah, just like this nasty mess over here that you guys left that I got to clean up.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm. ''[Audio cuts]'' -Yeah, I took care of my bills. I mean, not completely, but I took care of them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> What about going to, uh, Redmond?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> We! (Wii?) <br />
<br>[unintelligible, windows beeps]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[laughing]'' Yeah, sweetheart pool.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Mmhmm. ''[laughing]'' Like the other side of the pillow.<br />
<br>''[someone sighing. Clanging noises return after short absence]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' ...is all, I mean, living with your parents is okay bad-in today's bad economy, but at 26, come on. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Shut up, you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I'm being nice.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde isn't so bad a guy. He does bad things, but he's pretty cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah he's reformed. He's seen the error- Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How- how could he do that to Sarah? I mean- That's not right.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah. Well, that's like Luke... That's like Luke and Laura from General Hospital. I know that's like, before y'all's time, but, um... Luke was a rapist and she-he raped Laura and then, like, a few months later they get married. So... ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, I believe Clyde was trying to make amends from his past actions.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, but Chris, can you uh- can you forgive him?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Random Troll:'''</font> ''[whispering]'' White whale, holy grail! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Can you forgive a small-dicked Asian? Just a thought.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He's not Asian! <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm half-Asian, okay? My parents ''[unclear]'' I don't really wanna go into it. It's too bo-boring for you people. But this is why I ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you there? Just makin' sure, buddy.<br />
<br>''[clattering]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Move out.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Another Troll''':</font> Well, how do I do that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi there, my kitty. ''[In baby voice]'' Yes, there's a pretty kitty.<br />
<br>''[Someone speaking with a voice-synth]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hang on a second. I've got, like, a thousand different... Oh, Crass, why'd you do that?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Because. You can unban him but, yeah. I'm not gonna friggin' stand for that. <br />
<br>''[Sound of a vacuum cleaner]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> I (m j d?) do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I heard the "g" word.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um, is that a vacuum cleaner?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Yeah, sounds like it is.<br />
<br>[Trolls speak but are drowned out by vacuum]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ...room or something.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I think the vacuum cleaner... <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If that's the government trying to do some kind of thing, then my name's Rusty Shackleford.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's a loud fan.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I have a fan above my stove, too.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Hey... I do, too.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Wait- wha- wait. You-you-you're in the kitchen? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Me too.<br />
<br>''[possibly Sonic game sound effects]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmhm? Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I'm pretty sure it's already asked, but I didn't catch the answer. When can we expect the next Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I-I-I told you my suggestion of releasing a page a day or something. I mean, it's a pretty good one. It-it-it allows for a good time. Finish a page a day. You upload it. You know? It's very good. Works very well.<br />
<br>''[Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh. I mean- you guys keep asking when he's going to finish it but I wonder how many pages are going to be in the new one? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> The last one was like, thirty. Just release it over the span of a month. Works fine. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...go up to ninety thousand...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[mutters something]''<br />
<br>''[Sound of Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Down by the river...side.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful voice, Chris.<br />
<br>''[clattering, typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[unclear, repeating the same two phrases]'' Gone down by the river, down by the water side, down by the riverside. Down by the waterside. Down by the riverside.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember ''[unclear]''<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -I'm hungry myself.<br />
<br>''[some kind of alarm sounding]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Then go eat.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I already ate.<br />
<br />
===Anime And Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I wonder what anime Chris watches nowadays. There's not many on television but do you still watch Japanese cartoons? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[In a bad accent]'' Kawaii desu ne. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I want to watch Shuffle. He said it was very good. He said it was sad. I don't know if I wanna watch- I don't like sad stuff. I like to be happy when I watch anime.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, and um, do you watch stuff like Bleach and um Code Geass or Naruto or something?<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I'm glad to hear that Shuffle isn't sad. I'm definitely going to watch it sometime.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um, yeah Chris that was a good call on Naruto. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah there's a lot of people who don't like it much either. Too popular.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But please. Please. Hope. ''[audio cuts out briefly]'' Uh, Chris, please consider When They Cry.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Ooh, I saw that one. It was a really good series.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, I know; that was good, like- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah. Both seasons of it. <br />
<br>''[Windows beeps, voices overlapping]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I could link you to Season One if you want. Yeah, Samantha got me into that. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...you'll give it a try, Chris. It's a very, very good series.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Hm. Hey, Julie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...lots of ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Watch Shuffle. You got the six episodes of Shuffle or... Which o- which anime? I'm sorry. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh and JoJo's Bizarre Adventure is also cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I really liked JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. Very ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Za warudo!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah, I think Shuffle is quite all right. I like Heidi. She's sweet and loyal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> That's a good one. One of my favorites is Black Lagoon.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris have you ever seen La Blue Girl?<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other about different anime]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, uh, Chris can I, my, uh, I don't know if it's all right, but, like, could you like, give me an email sometime? I could, uh... recommend you to... this anime that... Polly and... Julie like to watch. They're quite- they... Oh, C-and Cogs has recommended such great anime. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[talking to his mother]'' Yeah? That's ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> As well as Julie-Julie's the person that got me into anime.<br />
<br />
===People Love Poketunes===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> -we can go into this later cause I got my headphones on. And, Mom, you know what something else? They liked your singing.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> What? I don't sing.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> That's my laugh; that's my laugh. They couldn't hear me. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They heard you. Singin'. Just now.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I can't sing!<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I'm tone deaf. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They just heard you singing, and liked your voice.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay. Did you write checks for all those bills and pack everything ''[unclear]''?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yes, Mother, I did.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You're not telling me no story?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm not telling you no story.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> OK. It's important [''inaudible''] did you pay them?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, I paid that one. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay, you have to be honest with me, 'cause, see, you're settin'...<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm being honest, I'm being honest.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> How you respond to what [we] talk about. You say you ought to something and you don't do it then that's gonna change my ideas ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay... I'll be sure to pay the remaining differences next month.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> No, this month.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I know but I couldn't pay them all with 90 dollars so there's still some left ''[sound cuts]'' ...oh, you're cooking them up here, okay, that's why you turned the fan on over the stove.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br>''[Trolls rejoice and mock Momma Chandler]''<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 1|Mumble Chat 1]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 3|Mumble Chat 3]]|}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Spanish]]<br />
==Links==<br />
*[https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBOVVDS0JtSDNvMWs Download]<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_2&diff=163018Mumble 22012-09-26T23:22:29Z<p>Irisviel: /* Clyde's A Dick */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{Articleofthenow}}<br />
[[Image:0839-MomDesi.JPG|thumb|right|180px|In Mumble 2, a Wild [[Barbara Chandler|Snorlax]] appeared.]]<br />
<br />
'''Mumble 2''' is the second [[Mumble]] chat that took place on 4 [[February 2009]]. More than an hour long.<br />
<br />
This is a more organized Q&A type chat than [[Mumble 1]]. Questions from [[Clyde]] about [[sex]] in the [[comic]] and interesting tidbits about how Chris believes sex is the same as romance. This is pretty hard hitting, with stuff like how Chris is into [[McDonald's|fast food]] yet he's against tobacco. A lot of drama involving Clyde.<br />
<br />
Length: '''1:49:17'''<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
<br />
===Notes===<br />
* Chris doesn't like Clyde because he stole his sweetheart.<br />
* Audio cuts out for a minute before Chris says: "...HYMEN!" (You broke her hymen)<br />
* Trolls claim [[Panda]] is with Clyde, Chris wants to hear her voice, they say she's busy<br />
* 'She and I WERE very close'<br />
* Chris didn't have $400-$800 to go and see Panda; claims he got this number from an airport website recommended by [[Miyamoto]]<br />
* Insists on [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] being in ''[[Animal Crossing]]''<br />
* Doesn't want to talk about his deal with them<br />
* Insists that he doesn't have to turn down his radio since his voice is louder (''it is horribly loud in the mic'')<br />
* Panda gave Clyde all of the sites, etc.<br />
* [[Sarah]] is going to be with Clyde, which Chris wants to deny<br />
* These motherfuckers keep talking over each other<br />
* Calls a troll's critique crap<br />
* [[Bubbles]] must be aroused, she isn't wet all the time<br />
* Bubbles is 90% water so does sperm just swim around forever? NO<br />
* Clyde: This is a children's comic, why so much sex?<br />
: '''Chris:''' It is romance. My best artwork is when they're making out 'romantic moments', drawn in protest to trolls. Shows that [[Rosechu]]s have vaginas, not [[duck]]s.<br />
* Admits to maybe going overboard<br />
* Trolls try to reason with him about the [[ED]] article: There wouldn't be an article if he didn't react like he does.<br />
* Trolls say that TV-Y7 means NO SEX but Chris points to romantic anime that have making out (cartoons are for kids, whatever the content).<br />
* Trolls talk about Japan being less strict about those things<br />
* Everyone gets to vote in [[CWCville]], even if they're [[Niggos|black]].<br />
* Got his idea from [[Mary Poppins]].<br />
* Troll tries to give historical background about cough medicine putting kids to sleep. Chris insists it was the lullaby that put them to sleep.<br />
* Discussion about Chris, 'gay message' sent by a troll<br />
* He calls Clyde a scoundrel<br />
* BELIEVE HIM HE IS STRAIGHT<br />
* Chris tries to speak Mexican at 20:50<br />
* Mexican speaks Mexican to him... he replies in Menglish<br />
* [[4-cent_garbage]] is located in Mexico<br />
* Someone says that he needs to improve his Mexican<br />
* Chris is against smoking, CWCville is smoke and alcohol free<br />
* Rehash of why [[tobacky]] is bad, his position on it, alcohol=bar fights<br />
* Chris's dad smoked and had several bypasses, has a pacemaker and has had heart attacks<br />
* Mention of his hair cuttings for his fans<br />
* Chris was doing math in his head, got in car crash.<br />
* Chris has taken college level math. Took trigonometry.<br />
* Trolls gang up on Clyde for stealing Panda<br />
* Time will tell when Chris will make the money he would have in the Nintendo deal<br />
* Trolls bash Clyde for his pot smoking <br />
* Chris doesn't watch news because it's bad news =(<br />
* Bashing of the Mexican<br />
* Chris can type 30 to 100 WPM, but can't type and talk at the same time<br />
* Chris says [[PSN]] is free though Clyde(?) points to the $1,000 Chris spent on PSN<br />
* Chris has been typing for 15 minutes now and it is VERY loud<br />
* Chris has been busy IRL therefore the comic release doesn't have a date<br />
* Someone points to nudes on [[YouTube]].<br />
* He does not have it on the YouTube, but he isn't going to take it anymore.<br />
* Claims some of the photos are photoshopped.<br />
* Clyde offers help to take ED page down.<br />
* Chris denies taking those pictures, doesn't want to talk about it, making him uncomfortable.<br />
* Some of the pictures are real. When questioned which ones are fake, Chris can't answer.<br />
* Chris hates Harry Potter because it was in competition with [[Pokémon]]!<br />
* Chris is too stressed to read Vivian's [[A Girl Who Brought Down the World|book]], but he likes the cover!<br />
* Polly, who has been talking the whole time is confronted by Chris who thinks she is a guy. Polly is upset. Chris apologizes.<br />
* [[Jimmy Hill]] has launched his Sonichu show<br />
* More Mexican talk at 55:10<br />
* Chris giggles and sighs happily when Cassie, another Mexican, compliments him and when she leaves he says 'Chiquita Bonita'<br />
* Rabbichoso talk (Sonichu.info)<br />
* Classic trolls are leaving Chris alone.<br />
* Chris likes Steel Angel Kurumi (''quote from [[Wikipedia:Steel Angel Kurumi|Wikipedia]]: often classified as ecchi due to the focus on fanservice and panty shots'')<br />
* Chris claims to be very strong, could beat Clyde up. Says he would show Clyde a [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force|Hard Day's Night]], and would give Clyde pain.<br />
* ShinyMarshtomp makes an appearance? Likes Rabbichoso<br />
* Chris likes to eat at [[Country Cookin]] (''like Golden Corral'')<br />
* Chris likes to imagine his first time. <br />
* Clyde says the first time is awful, Chris said it was because Clyde prematurely ejaculated<br />
* Watch porn with naked women to cure your gay<br />
* Guys sitting next to you = gay coming on to you<br />
* Falsion has been in the chat room and is afraid he is gay<br />
* A wild Snorlax appears<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
<br />
===Waiting for Chris===<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I can't wait to hear Chris! I'm a huge fan!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, goddamn these noodles are fantastic. Man, I wish I could eat like this everyday.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Have you eaten the rice balls?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no. These are noodles. These are-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Fan-fucking-tastic.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now they're all gone, it's fantastic, you know?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Sweetangie is Chris. Or, we think so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's definitely not the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm disappointed there's so many impostors out there. Kinda my fault, but, you know, if it weren't- ''[unintelligible]'' -hard to come by.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His mic was working last time he was here, just fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He usually capitalizes his words, like in every sentence.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is- I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Is it set to push to talk or something?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You better get us your email address Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah its push to talk. It's called push to talk. It's fantastic ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, just have him set it to voice activity. It works so much better that way.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Aww, he left.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> You guys are fucking idiots.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other again]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You guys scared him off by being guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, you fucking jackasses. Nice going.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Was that even the real...?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yes, that was the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He's too much of a pussy to talk.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, cause you scared him, or some- No, or he's too stupid to be.<br />
<br>''[Trolls Laugh]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Arrives===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Chris arrives, with radio playing loudly]'' Hello.<br />
<br>''[Trolls all greet him]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, now-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Why haven't you got your microphone working?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't know why my microphone [is] messed up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry, but we had an impostor here before.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm registered. I've got myself registered now. So, uh, hopefully-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> That's probably why. It had to like, uh- calibrate.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Well, I'm calibrated now.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So, Chris, have you seen Rabbichoso, it's fantastic.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't give a crap about your stupid pencil sketch.<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am not listening. I do not have to listen to ''you''.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Why, I'm not understanding [inaudible]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well for one thing,and I'll say it on here, you stole my sweetheart!<br />
<br>''[Cutout continues]''<br />
<br />
===PandaHalo, Trip to Redmond and Animal Crossing===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You broke her hymen!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I know it's a terrible mistake, but I plan to make it up to her. I'm getting married and uh- I'm doing the things I should do.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh and another thing, if she is really over there with you now, then put her on the mic. Please.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> She's not- He never said-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, Chris, she's very busy, OK. She's very busy.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's not over here right now. Okay? So lets drop it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, fine. Well could you tell her to please send me a message lettin' me know, for sure, so I can know- so I can know to-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' I'll let her know whatever you want, but it's her life. She doesn't have to send you a message. You failed her. You failed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' She and I were very close.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If you we're so close, then why didn't you go?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' Because I had- Aw, hang on a second. How do I- oh, that's right. This thing. Right. Mmm. Hold on a sec. Oh yeah, because I did not have four to eight hundred dollars!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It doesn't cost that much to go cross-country man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes it does. I know, I saw it on an airport website. Where I was be- Where I was- recommended to me by Mr. Miyamoto.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, you can drive there. It's not that hard.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened with that? I thought, um, didn't you have a deal with them or something? I heard a rumor that your characters were going to be in Animal Crossing.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, they are in Animal Crossing. And I did- and I do- I did have a deal with them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened though?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' I'd rather not say.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Radio, Clyde and Criticism===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, why don't you turn down the TV? It's hard to hear you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Annoyed sigh]'' I do not have a TV turned on in here.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I can hear it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have a radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I hear something in the background.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Burping throughout sentence]'' Well that's the- that would b- the radio. And it is not that loud.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But it shows up pretty well on your microphone mic. With due respect.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But still, my voice is louder than the radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Ah goo- ahh given.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh, Chris? Uh, when are you going to do the new Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something over Polly]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' Uh, I'll answer Polly's question. I'm not sure. It's, uh, it's in progress right now, I'm drawing it up.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I can't wait to read it!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Well, we'll see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Listen, Clyde kind of has admin on here, so we can't really do anything about him. So, yeah. I don't know.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Hard to hear over Chris's radio]'' ...with you guys. I love you guys. Just as much as Chris loves you guys. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I was angry. I was angry. But I'm calm now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't try to hurt any other person from now on.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm doing the best I can. I'm doing the best I can.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have much- I do not have much to say in response to that right now. Because I'm ticked off.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't let him get to you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're no better than he is, if you give in.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris, I just wanted to let you know I'm a huge fan of the comics, and I'm glad you keep doing what you're doing. You're doing a great job, and just keep it up, alright man?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, yeah, I appreciate the, uh, what's the word I'm looking for? The, the, uh- well, the encouraging words. Encouragement. I appreciate the encouragement. Well, there are things, uh- I- er- current events I do not appreciate. I appreciate the positive encouragement.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I can't really do anything. He took over the IRC channel. I used to be the owner. I mean Clyde. He's like taking over everything.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, it was because Panda gave it to me, you know. But anyway, I mean, you can't just listen to encouragement, you've got to listen to criticism, man. Criticisms are what make you better, you learn from your mistakes. You learn from mistakes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Be right back guys, my wife is calling.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I don't- I don't- Tons of people don't like the Rabbichoso art style, but you know, I gotta improve on that. That's something I plan to improve on. There's a lot of criticism in the death of Sonichu, right? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What? What did you just say?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a lot of criticism of Sonichu. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. For a moment there I thought you said something different.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What, what did you think I said? I'm just saying, there are people who like it and people who don't like it. You gotta start taking in those suggestions. You know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. So many things that will be improved upon. But, I just have to hear from Sarah herself that she really is going to be with you, Clyde. I have to hear it from herself. It's one thing to hear it from you and then it's- then on that note, it's just I find it very hard to believe. So I have to hear it from her.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I kinda think that Rabbichoso sucks. I mean, I think it could be funny, but it honestly looks like it's drawn by a kindergartner.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, Sonichu has evolved over the years. You can see that the art's getting better. Rabbichoso doesn't even look like something a beginner would do, honestly. I mean, ''[Interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A whole bunch of crap!<br />
<br>''[Everyone starts talking at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, Sonichu is in color.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I know, I accept his criticism. But you just called it crap! Now that's just rude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have emotions going behind me- uh, behind that opinion.<br />
<br />
===Cassie===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, did you get my message.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Aren't you going to be the gentleman, then? Aren't you gonna be the gentleman?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I just want to ask you, Chris. I'm Cassie's friend. She- she's worried sick about you. Why haven't you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did email her! As a- I- I haven't gotten any re-plies from her. I have emailed her and I have instant messaged her on A.I.M. and Skype. I haven't heard back from her. I don't know what's going on there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> ...you emailed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> When was the last time you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, hang on, I'll check.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris? I have a question. My fa- One of my favorite new characters is, um, Simonla, and like, I also like Zapina as well. Um, are they gonna have bigger parts in the series later on?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, could you repeat that question?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I was wondering if Simonla and Zapina will either have bigger parts in the series later on. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [[Sonichu_10#The_Final_Countdown|Possibly]]. Possibly, but, uh, I can't say for sure. Oh, and, uh, to answer your question, uh- in answer to, uh, I believe, uh, Screwhead, who asked? It was about four days ago. About four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Yeah. Four days ago? Okay, I'll tell her to check it out.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> The last email I sent was about four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> She'll contact you in a while, though.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I'll tell her to check it out and- and thanks Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright. Mm.<br />
<br />
===Bubbles's Pussy and Sex in the Comics===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris? I have a question.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, my favorite character is Bubbles, I kinda liked the, uh, the thing she had going with Blake, where she was kind of keeping the relationship secret. I thought that was kinda clever. I was wondering, uh, she's a water-type, so does that mean that her vagina is always wet, or does she have to be aroused like a normal woman?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, aroused. That's applied for all the, uh, Rosechus there. And also, like, you know, she's not just a water-type, she's also- she's a water- and electric-type, like uh- oh, shoot- What's the name of that one? Originated from Gold-Silver-Crystal series, uh, evolves from Chinchou? Lanturn. And she has, uh, she has Volt Absorb ability.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, Chris, another question following Bubbles. Uh, her body is 90% water, and now this thing about the whole sexual intercourse- about it. Now, don't take this rude, and you don't need to answer me... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...I totally respect your creative work. My wife actually got me into this, uh, show actually. So, what happens is- like, as you know, like, semens are like little fishes in themselves. Would that mean, I mean, would they actually have a route to fly into the egg, in theory, or do they just swim around her whole body, just forever just swimming around.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. The, uh, the internal or- the internal organs uh, for the Rosechus are pretty much the same thing, so I'd say pre- about, uh, as good chance as most any other mammal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, so you mean she's able to control her density a little bit more. She- I understand now. She's able to control more her density from the 90% water. Okay. That pretty much answers it just perfectly. That's been bothering me at work. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I got another question, Chris, about this whole sexual thing. I mean, this is a children's comic, right? Why is there so much sex in it?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. It's called romance, and my- and my- if you'll notice throughout the comics my best pieces of artwork among which were those where dey were kissing and making out. Romantic moments.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a hidden page-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' And because- and because- and because of the tension from, uh, the trolls and Encyclopedia Dramatica, I just felt like doing that in protest against them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, but childre-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' Yes but how is that really a protest? That, you know, you know, are, are you like referencing to the 60's when women burned their bras? That was in protes- That was feminism. Saying that they weren't slaves to men. Do you even understand the whole thing?<br />
<br>''[Multiple voices are heard at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Now, to tell you the truth, I never really thought about, I never really thought about that when I-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Chris]'' Then how is, stripping was, how was that protest-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Jack]'' It shows that they have vaginas and NOT dicks. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well you know the dick thing was the fact that they were just, you know, mocking you. I think you went overboard with that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well maybe I did. Maybe I did. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, you did, because that seems kind of excessive, kind of-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' I don't think they would have even bothered to write about an article about you if you didn't just keep reacting like that.<br />
<br />
===Chris justifies sex in a kids' comic===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I have another question.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The point some of us are trying to make is, if it's TV-Y7 that means there should really be no sex in it at all.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible over other people]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's pretty much incorrect, I mean, uh, there's so many romantic anime that's TV-Y7, and they shoul- they have making out.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, a lot of things in Japan, Japan has stricter standards-not stricter, I mean looser guidelines than America. It's much different.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear ya.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I was just wondering what Bubbles, um, she has a, that water whirlwind attack, I was just curious if you had any plans to make- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Butting in]'' By the way, that was a Whirl- Whirlpool.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font>Yeah, Whirlpool, sorry, sorry, Whirlpool, but do you have any plans to mix an, uh, Electric-type attack with that, since water conducts electricity, right? It could be a very powerful-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah, she did, she did an electric attack amongst the- the walls of that Whirlpool and she let out. In case you didn't know, there's a- little bits of lightning bolts among which-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, oh, I'm sor- I didn't notice that, I'm sorry, I'll go take another look. Thank you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hey Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> You make some pretty sweet Little Big Planet levels.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you.<br />
<br />
===Chris on Benadryl babysitting===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, there's a message from Cogs on the side, it's about, uh, do women not have the right to vote already in CWCville.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, evry- Everybody, no matter what age, no matter what gender or race, everybody has the right to vote in CWCville. Even if they're black.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Then what's up with the "Votes for Women" thing, I was-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Not just vote women, but- ''[interrupted]'' any other ethnicities, and gays?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't understand-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did that- heard it in Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What? Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, man, Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, yeah, that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's a classic. It's my favorite movie of all time.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that movie was, like, based in the 1900s.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but still I- still I agreed with that message there-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Taken out of context, that makes it seem like CWCville's set in the 1960s.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What message? That children should be given cough medicine so they'll go to sleep?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''What?''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that's what women used to do back in- That's what mothers, friggin' nurses and stuff used to do to kids in the 1900s, is give children, like, you know, cough medicine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Cause- cause the medicine- uh, correction, the medicine did not put them to sleep, there was a lullaby, not the cough medicine. They only had to take the cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ...because it rained, before dere, and it was not, and it was to, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Rain means cough medicine doesn't have anything to do with each other. That's not how friggin' germs are spread, or colds are gotten. Colds are gotten through germs, not the rain.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How is cough medicine any different from today's parents that just let their kids watch TV until they fall asleep? I mean, it's just as bad.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well- Cough medicine has a lot to do with the psychological effects of it. Obviously if you get- if you keep giving fre-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Thanks, Samantha, that was delicious.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's my, uh, Samantha-<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, that's we're all saying, cause I've heard that there's a lot of different chemicals in cough medicine. You could pick up a ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I don't even take cough medicine, because I'm not a pussy.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Anyway, I never put any references, I never did any references or plan any references to cough medicine or anything of that sort.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Well, Chris, Cassie says the last e-mail she got from you was on the 17th. How 'bout your being gay? Is that true?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[sigh]'' That wa- That was somebody had- That was Clyde hacking through my e-mail and spammed that to my contacts.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, I definitely did not do that-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You're a scoundrel-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -a slanderous lie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I did not do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Whoa-whoa-whoa. Wow. Well, thanks for that. She was worried that you were- that you don't like her.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> You're a scoundrel, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't do that. That was someone else.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I was wondering, because I've heard other news too, I was really hoping that you weren't gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Believe me, I'm straight.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I'll take your word for it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you. And, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Cogs- Cogs got a way- she showed us that, okay? I mean, you only ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br />
===Chris's fail-riffic Spanish===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So, Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, Screwhead's from Mexico. I heard you like Spanish, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hola, Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You know Spanish, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí. Conoso Mexico. Tomé dos años ''[unclear]'' mi escuela secundaria. (Yes, I know Mexico. I took two years [in, possibly] my secondary school.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has venido en Mexico? (Have you come to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, lo siento? (Uh, I'm sorry?)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has estado en Mexico? (Have you been to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Estoy Mexico? No. (I am Mexico? No.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[slowly]'' Has estado, um, in Mexico. Has venir? (Have you been to Mexico? Have gone?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Uh, no, I hav- no, no tengo pansars. ''[sic]'' (no, I don't have pansars (?))<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I think, uh, I think I meant to say- I'm pretty sure-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Did you just say you don't wear pants?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, no, I was trying to say, ah, I don't have plans to go in Mexico at the moment.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's what I understood what he was saying there.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, did you know that, that 4-cent garbage website is located in Mexico?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> That's why-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, that's why they can't get it shut down.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]'' borders, plus it's cheaper to run sites over there; they have, like, several servers.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wanted to talk to you, but she couldn't make it here, well, and, she wants to be your Spanish teacher, because she says that you've got room to improve your Spanish.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Oh, that Cassie. Yeah, I'm sorry, I thought you were- I got mixed up. Um... Yeah, um, I'm sorry, I, uh, I haven't talked to that- I haven't talked to Cassie in a while, but I've been mostly talking to, uh, her gal- her, uh, gal-pal and I'm sure- I'm sure she'd tell you a lot about her...<br />
<br />
===In which the trolls discuss bar fights===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey Chris, how- how does Sonichu keep Rosechu from spending more than a hundred dollars at the mall? I've always wondered how he could manage to do that. I've always had problems with that myself.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That wa- That time at the mall, it was, uh, Kel loaned the credit card. And it's like, yeah- she gave- she gave Sonichu the responsibility of that credit card. She did.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I've always given my advice on cannabis, you should do the ''[unintelligible]'', Cogs Chris, but I think she wants your response.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, one of my friends sent me this picture, and I think you might find it kinda disturbing just because they say it's proof that you're gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Aw yeah, I saw that, that's just a crappy Photoshop.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No, that one doesn't- this one doesn't look Photoshopped at all.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'm not gonna look at it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Oh, you're not? Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, uh, you say you're against smoking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. As a matter of fact, CWCville is a smoke-free, non-alcoholic city.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[partially drowned out]'' That's what we call a totalitarian state...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, and, uh, in the pilot episode with Seth MacFarlane, of, you know, Family Guy? He's always smoking. What do you think about that?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Go smoke.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I just- I just take that with a grain of salt, and, uh, you know, that's what-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, if he can smoke, why can't anyone else? I mean, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Because it causes cancer!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> So does a lot of things.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> It could be a prop pipe.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> In any case, I'm not- in any, in any case I've never done it and I never will.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, but eating too much fast food can give you a heart attack. I mean... so many things are deadly for you.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What about fast food, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> My father used to smoke and he went through a whole bunch of heart attacks. He suffered three- <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Well, I think that might have to do more with his weight.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He suffered through three or four triple bypasses.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I think that's... that's more like a weight issue.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He has a pacemaker!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, eh...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey ya guys, leave him alone. Ya know, my granddad, he smoked most of his life. He quit for 25 years and still died of lung cancer. I mean that's just the way it is. And your body never gets rid of it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, what about ''[pause]'' Chris, what about fast food? That's- that's bad for you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey Chris. Chris, could you do me a favor and send an email to Cassie? She's very worried about you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Yeah sure, I'll send her an email later.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, thanks.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, I've got uh, a certain someone you know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No no.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -she has to, uh, she wants to ask you w- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Also, she said something about some hair.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh yeah. Yeah, that's uh... that's another issue right there. Um, hmmm. I'll talk to her about that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, does, uh, drinking cause cancer?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, but it causes liver dysfunction and likely bar fights and automobile accidents.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, bar fights, but— <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Bar fights!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> -but I don't think that bar fights are that big of a problem.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I think bar fights are awesome.<br />
<br>''[People agree bar fights are awesome]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> But bar fights are bad. I got into a bar fight once and one of my hands got cut and two fingers from my left hand. Bar fights suck.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well, I think that might be more because you're Mexican. Are you sure you didn't lose them picking bo- picking grapes and- or something?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> No, Mexican people are more more- more much macho man; we get into bigger fights. We're more awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No- I think it might be because you got your hands stuck in some machinery when you were out picking in the vineyards.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't know about you guys, but I like- I like having bar fights.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Crashes Due To Math===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't have to be drunk to be in a bar fight or in an automobile accident, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but they increase the likeliness of it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You've been in an autobile— automobile accident, I mean, were you drunk?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I was distracted.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Uh, by what? I mean, it's kinda hard to be dist— you gotta be focused on driving man-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I was doing math in my head.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, math in your— <br />
<br>[Trolls talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> My mind got distracted by being its own calculator.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Are you good at math?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, is that for school?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Are you some kind of savant?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's impossible.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Guys, you're getting ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you like a mathematic genius or something?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> You know some artist people have like superpowers in their head. They can do like geniuses and add really well. ''[interrupted briefly by Jack saying something else about savant]'' Chris you are already an artist. Do you have any like, magical powers?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, I heard autistic people are really good at math. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Well not all the stereo- some of that sounds like stereotypes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[talking over Chris]'' ...it has to do with mental ability; I mean, what's the...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean I don't know- I mean I'm not saying that I'm a total genius. I mean I know- I know enough to get by.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What's the highest level of math you've taken Chris?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> College level.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I mean like algebra, or calculus or...?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. I believe I just did trigonometry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Very impressive.<br />
<br>[long pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So I was wondering. When did you get the CAD degree? I figured it's like a fine arts degree or something? I mean wha-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I designed a whole- I designed buildings and machinery and such along there. I designed the whole CWCVille shopping center.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don't you have a job then?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Your fans would love to see that Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' -I mean use that to design like, actual buildings? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I think I just told you I designed the CWCVille sho-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I don't mean in your comic. I'm just saying-<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde Isn't Popular And Chris Should Program===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well it's a good st-<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I heard you got some nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'll be putting an update on da YouTube soon, but not right now. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking maybe you could like, you know, get a degree in game design and make the Sonichu game? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah man, it's not that hard to learn programming. C++ man.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">''Falsion:'''</font> Clyde, he hates you, why are you talking?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm just giving him some advice, I mean C++ is-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you here? We don't like you. You totally ruined Chris's life.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't ruin his life. He ruined his own life.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yes you did. You've ruined his life. You raped his girlfriend. <br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks at once over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If he was the man he said he was, he'd have gone to Nintendo, made all that money. How- how are you going to make money now Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Time will tell.<br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks again]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, time will tell Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font>''[unclear]'' -need a plan, you know? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking uh, if- uh- would you be interested in getting a degree in game design. Making the game or something? Like if you had to? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Maybe but uh- I still have things to sort out in my real life.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah it's kinda unfortunate what happened with the Nintendo thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah- hang on a second, I'll be right back. Mm- ''[clattering]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So be honest guys am I really that much of a bother. I mean...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah you kind of are.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like a total dickfart.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You realize weed causes cancer? <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I didn't know that. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> And it causes the munchies. You're gonna get fat, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's okay, man, because I work out.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Do you play Guitar Hero standing up?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I play Guitar Hero while on the treadmill. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Will the Sonichu game be a- ''[muffled]'' -or a Wii one?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> It be a Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Wii would like to play. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh. I only got a DS. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I heard you are very good at HTML. Why don't you make a HTML Sonichu game? That would be awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't think you can make a game in HTML.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A- anyway I came back...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hey, Chris? How many courses did you have to take to get that degree in CAD? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -pretty sure you can make a game in HTML-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[speaking over]'' I'm took abo- took about two- took about two years to four years. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, if you can write HTML you can write C++, make your own games. Pretty simple man. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well it's something I'll consider. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde why are you talking to him? He hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm trying to give him some suggestions. I'm not insulting him, OK? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> HTML seems kinda outdated, so to speak. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font>I learn- I took two HTML classes so at least I know how to do- at least I know the ins and outs when it comes to like, workin' on it in the raw data- in the notepad.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> So you don't use Dreamweaver?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I also use Net- also use Netscape composer. <br />
<br>''[Someone starts singing 'Dreamweaver']''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I heard they went bankrupt or something.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't- I don- I don't listen to news because I don't care about bad news. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But that's not bad news that's just safety...<br />
<br>''[Talking over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why you gotta bring this bad vibe in here? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> OK OK I'll chill, I'm sorry it's just my wife- ''[can't hear over Chris typing extremely loud]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris you don't hear about these ones in a while. Like yesterday some guy in my town got run over by a train and he- he died. And that's a really bad thing, you know but you have to hear about it. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yeah but that's because you're Mexican. You Mexicans always play around the train tracks, what's with you? <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No come on, don't be racist.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> It's because Mexicans are stupid. I'm surprised I can use a computer. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' CrassCrab why do you have to be so mean?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> 'Cause my mother was raped by a Mexican. And I'm part Me- ''[muffled]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry man.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> That isn't fair to take it out on every other Mexican out there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His rule applied to millions. Just ignore him.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No I'm not my mother was raped by Mexicans.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> CrassCrab I'm tired of listening to you, get out of here. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Not all Mexicans are like that we- we- I am a nice Mexican guy. Not all Mexican guys are- ''[drowned out by typing]'' -Black guys are the people you should fear.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't get me started on them. But that will be another day. Cause I'm sick of hearing bad news.<br />
<br />
===Chris Types Fast (And Hates Hex-Box)===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris what are you uh- typing there?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm typing a email. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> How many words can you type? How fast can you type? Sounding fast there. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhh say about uh- sorta between thirty and a hundred. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's quite a good range man. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like "The Flash", minus the red jump-suit.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh Chris um- I was wondering if- ''[unclear]'' -game with Nintendo, would it be uh a Wii game or a DS game or both. I only own DS and I don't have any money for a Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[overlapping]'' Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wii, DS and Pla- hopefully uh- possibly uh, PlayStation 2 or 3. Never on [[Hex_Box|Hex-Box]]. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> When you gonna do this shit?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Why don't you like the Hex-Box? I mean I have an Xbox, I would love to play online with you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'd like to say this. Before Chris says anything about that I just wanna say that today my wife came home from the mall shopping for her usual clothes, that Gucci purse I had to buy for her. You know what she came home with? I wanted a PS3 but you know what she gave me was a frickin' Xbox 360. The Elite one? ''[someone speaks over]'' I know, I kept telling her like "Honey this isn't what I wanted. I wanted the PlayStation 3 so I can play LittleBigPlanet, Metal Gear Solid and Sonic Unleashed" <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You can put Sonic Unleashed on the Hex Box as well as Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Too whiny to make out]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Nintendo just- rejected your offer? Cause I- I heard a rumor that there was going to be a Sonichu game or something. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris uh. Cassie wants you to send her your Wii number so she can talk to you on the Wii. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright uhhhhh. I'll get- have to get my Wii number now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Send it to her in an email please.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they completely hate Sony. And they hate Microsoft as well. I mean this guy, Reggie? He always talks about kicking their ass and stuff. He's kinda crazy. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I know. Reggie's very mean he never brought out Mother 3 to America. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah I wanted to play that game.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talked over]'' -I'm tellin' you guys. Reggie's just a great ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Like what?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can- I can't say anything OK but... you'll see. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah so I don't think like if you got the deal with Nintendo I don't think they'd put it on like mu- like anything else but the Wii or DS. Yeah, cause that Reggie guy he frickin' hates Sony. And Microsoft. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wasn't he also the head of VH1?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or Pizza Hut.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. What are your favorite places to eat at? <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember um Peter Moore he used to - ''[unclear]'' -but before that he was with Sega when Dreamcast was out. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yup. Let me type this email please. I mean y'all keep talking I'll just listen. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's no reason to hate the Xbox. To be honest.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or um- Chris um- do you wanna release your game on Nintendo and on Sony. If you do talk to somebody like EA or something, you can like do um- multi-console thing like a third party thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[busy typing]'' Hmm. Well it's all to think about. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I mean Sega does third party now so um- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah well I'm gonna keep typing this email here. Y'all keep talking. <br />
<br>''[Sound of Chris typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's true, it's true. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Chris I wanted to tell you that Cassie's going to be here any- any second so you can talk to her. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Hm. ''[continues typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Don't you care about her? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[annoyed]'' I'm typin' da email to her right now! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah um 360 is pretty bad it um- red-rings all the time. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> I've had mine over two years. The same one. And it has not red-ringed yet. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Dude you have to pay $50 just so you can play online. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[echoing]'' Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah it's bullshit.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah it's totally free on PlayStation. And Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris. Chris. No, no, no, no, I gotta talk about this. [long pause] Chris...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupting]'' I get less connection problems myself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can't let you get away with this Chris. You spent over $1000 on the PlayStation Network. OK? And you say you can't afford $50 for the Xbox? Terrible reason. That's a terrible reason. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, um, Cogs I had a friend of mine whose red-ringed a lot of times. She did not like it at all. She got herself a PS3 instead. <br />
<br>''[Chris is STILL typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I heard that like- the PS triple eats up a lot of energy and like- has cau- has like- burned houses down. Cause it messes up the- no but the PS3 really- <br />
<br>''[More of Chris typing then audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So when's the next comic coming out Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I can't say. I don't have a date for it right now. I've been busy with the- with real life and such. You know getting the s- getting the website back up and all that. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh but I've been waiting so long. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I gotta tell you something Chris. ''[unclear]'' -to the trolls but I haven't done anythin' myself. It's run off into splinter groups doin' stuff to you. Ever since the Panda thing, I haven't done anything to you man. Everybody's been running round doing things. I have no control anymore. So I'm back here. This is why I'm back here. Do you understand? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. I hear you.<br />
<br />
===Nudes On YouTube===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I hear you got some uh- nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> What? <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hear you got some nudes on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Dudes?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Nudes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> That's what I thought- I have nothing na- I have nothing like that on the nu- on the YouTube. I've nothing like that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh someone posted the pics from the ED page. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> They're just tryin' ta get on- they're just tryin' ta get on my nerves again. But I'm not gonna let 'em.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Did you take those pictures or what? Where'd they come from?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Uh, are they Photoshopped?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah most of- Yes. Most of them are Photoshopped.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I can help you with ED. Chris I can help you with ED.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You can see the neck and the body doesn't quite match up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, Chris. Cassie's just arrived. She's just a little nervous about talking to you, but she's gonna talk to you soon. Is that OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I just got one quick comment. Look, the ED people were in contact with me, but I've lost contact with them. But I know you can delete that page permanently. I'm tryin' to help you man. You can get that page down forever. Even the entire site. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What, after you raped um- Sarah? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I'm trying to make amends. So let me do my business. All right?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's too late to make amends. Look what you did.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look what Chris has done. Look at what Chris has done, okay? ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um. Cogsdev said she had a look at the data, they have it up in Image editing software.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah. Well...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I don't know what to tell you there. <br />
<br>''[Several trolls speak at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Doesn't that mean they're real? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I don't think so. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You don't think so?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Well, did you take them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Then where did those pictures come from? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who took those?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I don't know. And I'd rather not talk about that anymore. It's making me feel uncomfortable.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Are you lying to your fans Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> We don't feel confort- we don't feel comfortable. We're big fans of your work and we don't like being lied to. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I'd like to make a point. It might just be a doppelganger [sic].<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, you know the thing I hate most is lies. I like to spread the truth about you Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You say you're honest, but you're lying to us.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[clearly annoyed]'' Fine, fine. Some those pictures are real. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Some of them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Some of them but not all of them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Like, which ones aren't real?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'd rather not go into detail because I'd rather not look at 'em. Cause uh- ''[interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' -are you ashamed of it?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Do you not like to look in the mirror?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You owe it- you owe it to your fans.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, but- yeah, but- yeah, but upon looking at those it's like ref- it's like reflecting a pe- uh p- a past moment in my life where I- I was played for the fool. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah, by the man in the pickle suit?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh that guy- I hate that guy.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah I saw- he was trolling some other people you know? So you're not alone, Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he took pictures of me like that too...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That guy's an asshole, I hate him.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhhh yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He took pictures of my wife too. Sick bastard. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> He's a peanut.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br>[another pause]<br />
<br />
===Chris Hates Harry===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I just uh- never was fond of it. Ever since it came out, I was never fond of it. ''[unclear as troll speaks over]'' -just like I hate Harry Potter because he's s- he's goin- he's uh- in compe- was in competition against the world of Pokemon. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Well that- that doesn't make sense. But they're two different medias. Pokemon-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah but- yeah but still he-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> -Harry Potter is a book.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah but he poses as competition against them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> That's not really competition. I mean- <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talks over Jack]'' Oh that reminds me about books- Vivi- Vivian wrote a book and sent it to you. You never read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes. I am afraid I- yeah, yeah- I'm uh- I've been uh- so I've been under uh- too much stress between internet and all that. I'll ge- I'll read it, I'll read it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's been waiting for your response for quite a long time.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I like the cover. (pause) Nice cover.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he is right about that. That is a nice cover. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah the book is pretty good- I read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Well I- I will definitely make it a point to uh- read it. Very soon. <br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Audible over the others]'' Did you ever read Twilight?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I've heard th- I've heard Twilight and I've seen the trailer but I haven't seen the movie, I'll wait for it to come out DVD or Blu-ray.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br />
===Random Access Humor Python Style===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh OK, I heard a lot of girls like Twilight. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I see. Hey Polly does your voice sound like that, 'cause it sounds like [[BlueSpike|a guy talking falsetto]]. I mean no personal offense. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> That's not very nice...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm sorry. Believe me I didn't mean any pe- anything personal it's just like, you know- hm- kind- just kinda takes me by surprise a bit, that's all.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I knew a girl like that in high school.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Sounding upset]'' I can't help it if I'm born like this.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I'm- I'm- I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah she's a girl. I saw her pics. She's a girl.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I'll s- I'll take his word for it. I'm sorry I cu- I accused you there.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um. OK. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You know, aut- I mean- let's- it's just uh- you know it's uh- you know it's uh a bit- just a spot of fun. [[Random-access_humor|Stupid humor]]. Monty Python's Flying Circus. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> We know you love that. There's just so many references to it in the comic. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah I d- after they put all of the entire series on PlayStation Network I downloaded the Hamlet episode- that was the one that had uh- Jimmy Hill parodying himself. It also had this funny bit where it was like, you know- ''[in a stupid voice]'' "...and now it's time for The Robinsons, an everyday story about blah-de-blah-de-blah-de-blah. Dum-de-dum-de-dum-de-duhhh-dum-de-dum"- and so on...<br />
<br>''[A troll begins to speak but is interrupted by a very high-pitched Chris]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> "Morning Mrs. Robinson- Morning Mrs. Robinson. Comin' out shoppin'? Oh- you've been shoppin', what did you buy? What's this?-" 'What did you buy this for?'[Trolls laugh over him]'' -It was a bargain!"<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I've heard you do that before. I don't know where. Anyway uh- uhm- Whatever happened to Jimmy Hill? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I haven't heard from him in a long time so just assuming uh- he gave up or uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I think he got a- I think he got a, uh- children's TV program in England.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well he ain't botherin' me, so I'm not worried about him anymore.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Ye- but he's stealing Sonichu. Bastardizing it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah he did but uh- he s- but haven't seen any updates on his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' -profile, he's still doing it.<br />
<br>''[Several trolls talk over each other about him having a TV show]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Fails At Spanish Pt. 2===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' <br />
<br>''[Troll says something more about the TV show, but it's muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wants to say hi. Just forgive her English because she can't speak very well, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> All right. Just sent her the email by the way, just now. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Hey, Chris. It's me, Cassie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi, Cassie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Fine, and you?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm feelin' OK. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Why haven't you emailed me? I was really about-was really worried about you. What's happened? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry. I be- I've bee- I've been busy with the Internet and the stress and all that. I sent ya an email just now go- it's got my Wii number in it so you can add me to your contacts. I've been talking to uh- I've been talking to Sarah lot- quite a bit lately. She's been helping me with uh- updating the Sonichu site, since I've uh- since I'm working on uh- it's re-uploading and such. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Kay, I believe you. I going to check ''[pronounced like 'sheg']'' it, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You're going to where?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[very quietly]'' Check it.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> To check it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> To "shag-it"? Is that the-<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Check the email. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[still doesn't understand]'' Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> I going to check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, check email. ''[Laughs]'' Yeah I'm sorry I tr- I tried to uh- understand but it just kind of messed up a little bit. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don- why don't you two speak in Spanish?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhh. I'm not exactly fluent. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ¿Sabes hablar español, Chris? (Do you know how to speak Spanish?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí, hablo español. (Yes, I speak Spanish)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Oh. ''[pause, one of the trolls says something to her]'' Oh, eso es muy sexy. (That is very sexy.)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Ohhhh. Te gusta. Te gusta muchísimo, (You like it. You like it a lot)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> La verdad, si. (To tell you the truth, yes)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Me amos mis amigas muchísimas. Sons muy bueñas! (I love my friends (feminine) a lot. They are very good.) [Correction: Amo a mis amigas muchísimo. Son muy buenas.] <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Oh, eso es tan cool en español! Muy bueno! (That's so cool in Spanish! Very good)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Muy bueño (very good)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Aha, exacto. (it is!)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]'' Okay, that's good. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Well, I going down, okay?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Okay, you're going down- by the way, let me ask ya Cassie, do you ever- you've uh- you've actually met uh Sarah May in person, haven't you? <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Not. She's on Internet.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Okay. That's cool- but anyway uh- you got- you d- you have my Wii number, uh- you can reply the email with your Wii number and it'll be registered on the Wii network. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[very haltingly]'' Yes. So. Cool. Talk with you Chris. You are so cool. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Heh. Uhhhh. You flatter me. Tú me flatteray. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[Weak laugh]'' Well, see you. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[In his 'baby voice']'' Adiós. ''[sigh]'' <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós, bebé.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós, chiquita bonita. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>[Pause as audio cuts out]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -it again. <br />
<br>[Another pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So anyway, Chris. I've been working on Rabbichoso for a day and uh- I was just wonderin' like, it's- it's supposed to compete with the Sonichu, you know? If you weren't aware of that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhhh. I grabbed onto d- grabbed onto g I- grabbed onto the... that gist. I'm aware- I'm aware of the gist of the theory. Uh. I'm aw- I'm aware that you're- that you're tryin' to compete. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know what competition does. It's drives uh- it drives consumer interest- Well that's why you know- It's great. You have to compete with high quality things. ''[muffled]''- that's why I'm trying to help. You know, compete. Just so you're aware of this, OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I see. -see. <br />
<br>[Pause]<br />
<br />
===Rabbichoso And Animu===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris we've been ge- been getting uh threatening images from the Pickle Man. Did you s- did you see the left? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I've not heard from the Pickle Man in lo- in a long time. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Apparently there are multiple ones because this one is, uh, not a darkie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh-huh. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> It's good that they're leaving you alone now. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Seems like they found more easier targets. Seeing as how you became [[Navy|saltier]].<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh. You know I originally got that line- quote from an e- ep- episode of ExCel Saga. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> From what?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> ExCel Saga.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Oh, ExCel Saga. Oh, yeah, that's a good anime.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> AIII I-Falazzo! (''He means [[ScotPalazzo|Il-Palazzo]]'')<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, have you ever seen two animes, ''[muffled]'' and Schooldays?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I have not seen either of those. I like Steel Angel Kurumi as well.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, how much Japanese do you know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only a little bit. I'm not totally fluent. I can say that with all honesty. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something unintelligible, not quite Japanese]''<!-- It sounds like he's saying "You say you can't- can you speak with me?" in CHINESE. --><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Huh?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Never mind, you won't understand it.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[unclear] Chris-Chan. Genki desu-ka?''<br />
<br />
===Chris Could Kill Clyde===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, I just wanted to say, uh, you're doing a good job, like, keeping calm even though Clyde is here. I mean u- I thought you'd be, like, more angry at him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm being calm with you guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> -I would have been choking him by now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I'd have kicked his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Preach to the choir. Pr- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I'd make him choke on a pickle if it were up to me.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You guys can't touch me otherwise I'd kick all your asses. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, bring it.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris could kick Clyde's ass anytime.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Let's see Chris do it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Bring it to me any day of the week and I'll definitely show him a hard- day's night. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah I think you could kick his ass.<br />
<br>[Trolls and Clyde talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Sings]'' -been a hard day's night...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -never mind, just...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean that as a- meant that as in I would beat... him up. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Kick his ass?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm very strong. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. I'm gonna see you later, OK?<br />
<br>''[Unison of goodbyes]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> OK see ya. Thank you so much Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[ignoring his fans]'' Yeah I can- I can lift about my weight. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Like um- if Clyde were right in front of you, what would you do to him?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Like, what kind of style of fighting do you have?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, shut up.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I gotta know my competition. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Personal- in the physical offense. ''[sigh]'' I would definitely be giving you so much physical pain. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's not a s- that's not a style. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I would beat you up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He deserves it man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, that's still not a style...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He uses fisticuffs. He's a gentleman. Gentleman fisticuffs. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Whatever, I'll just see-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Stop arguing and just-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ''[Over previous troll]'' I mean, if he did that to my sweetheart I'd fucking kill him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well. He's not- he's not going to come over and kill me, I know that. He doesn't have the money. [pause] You know I'm surprised that you're mad here. You're much kinder in person I thought you- Now I'm just expecting you at my door anytime, just waiting for you to stand here with an axe or something. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Knives are too messy. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Ah, now a sword- sword's are usually better.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What about poison?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Poison's good, poison's good.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde, what- do you want him to beat your ass?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I was just expecting it, you know.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, you know what's another thing? I would definitely not tell you how I would be hurting you, but I would definitely give you a who- big amount of pain. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, he's gonna keep you guessin'!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he deserves it. After everything he's done-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Muffled by troll]'' -going to kill me, I'd like to know. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I'm just going to let you cover in- worry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh so you're never going to show up, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Oh yes I will show up. But you just won't be expecting it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't even know where I live, do you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Find out!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Maybe I should give you my address. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, you should track him down and kick his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> But I'm going to leave you guessing too...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Defend Panda's h- Panda's honor.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, hi Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> 'sup Julie.<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br>''[Everyone talks over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde's A Dick===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I notice her mic doesn't work. But still I'm just letting her know that- acknowledge her presence. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're doing well staying calm even though Clyde's here.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, Clyde's a total dick.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Fucker.<br />
<br>''[Rustling]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I mean, he's taken over everything. The IRC. This. I can't- no one can stop him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' -over there, so...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll:'''</font> I- I like Rabbichoso.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Of course you do. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll''':</font> It's funny. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I will not offer any new comment on it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, OK. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, when can we expect the next Sonichu to be released.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, we've been eager.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It'll be soon. It will be soon.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah just ignore Clyde man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean if you're going to put a hard date on it, you'd better deliver your promise. If you don't, I'll strike harder. That's all I'm saying.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. You're saying if I don't set a date, you're gonna...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no. I'm saying don't make promises you can't keep. Don't make promises you can't keep.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He'll choke you with his medallion bitch!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who the hell do you think you are?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I agree with Cogs over there. Maybe you should do just a page a day, not release all at once. Keep his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you telling him this when he hates you?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm giving him suggestions man, OK? OK?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Only thing he's gonna suggest to you is 'shut the fuck up'!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, seriously man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It's alright. <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Penny Arcade's slow.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh you mean like Penny Arcade or 8-Bit Theater or MegaTokyo?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they're just like- boring. Then they because sellouts.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Country Cookin===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Chris, where's your favorite place to eat?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. Can't really say uh- but I like country cookin'. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> What's country cooking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh no G's in the sto- no G's in the name by the way, no G. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah what's country cooking? I'm not familiar with that.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's like uh- som- something like Golden Corral. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But Golden Corral is a national franchise.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh Chris, how are your parents?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> They're OK.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br>[Long pause]<br />
<br />
===Sex Is Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I've got a sug- another suggestion. Now be quiet all of you cause I know you hate me. Just- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, Chris hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well don't defend him. He can defend himself OK? He's a man. But whatever-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let him speak.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm suggesting that- you go on and on about this sex stuff but you've never gotten laid, have you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I like to put myself in the imaginative situation that I'd like to be in and the sexual stimulation. So I can be ready for [[ego|myself]] for when I do actually have my first time.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well my first time was- I'll just say that it's terrible, OK? I didn't know what I was doing, she didn't know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let me guess, you prematurely ejaculated?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no, it's not like that you don't know what to do. Every woman's told me OK? You can't prepare-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Clyde]'' First time's always awkward...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -I learnt that mistake a while back, OK whatever. OK, you just- you can't prepare for your first time. You might as well just have a really bad first time so you learn from your mistakes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm not trying to defend Clyde or anything, but yeah it's kinda true. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Hmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The girl I first fell in love with is the girl I'm married to right now. Samantha just changed my world. But marriage does get boring.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Tips To STAY STRAIGHT===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I know how you say how important it is to stay straight, um- I'm having trouble staying straight, do you have any suggestions?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Watch a bunch of pornography with uh- with naked women. OK, a lot of naked women.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That happened to me one time...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, I have this friend I play video games with, is that gay? He's male by the way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry could you- I'm sorry could you repeat that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I have this guy I'm friends with he always comes over to my house to play video games. Is that gay? I'm kinda scared. You know? I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Hmm. Is he making any advances towards you? Personally. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I dunno how to tell. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Like uh sit- does he always sit next to you when he's playing games. Playing video games.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Yeah he usually does. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I see. Hmm. My- well- my suggestion in that case, would be to keep a heavy distance between you and that guy. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he meant anything gay by it though. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he means anything like- gay about it. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well, still- it's always best to find out- you can ask him. Don't be afraid to ask him. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> What would you do in this situation?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well if he said yes then I would uh- basically- let me think about that a moment. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you have any friends who're are like, guys?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only acquaintances and only a few of them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you play video games with people or anything? Do they come over to your house?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. No.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I remember-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> ''[Cuts Polly off]'' I'm just worried I might be gay or something. I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You probably are Falsion, but that's OK. No, look dude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Leave him alone! Leave him alone! He's straight!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Why?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Hey, let's have a calm conversation here. Let's not have any fights.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br>''[Trolls speak over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I've been reading the Sonichu comics and man, they are page-turners! Seri- I was on- I was on the edge of my seat for a while. I ju- I couldn't- I couldn't- you know. Just had to read and read.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Thank you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, can I be your friend? I know I'm a guy. I don't mean anything gay by it. Can I be your friend? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. I dunno. <br />
<br />
===A Wild Snorlax Appears===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Do you want any hotdogs?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I'm OK. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> No?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I was talking with my mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I was wondering if I could be your friend.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I h- heard you only like, you only like to be acquaintances. With guys. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, ummm. Let's just pretty much leave it at acquaintance. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hello Mrs. Chandler. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> She can't hear you, I'm wearing my earphones.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Listen, I'm not gay. I don't- you know- yeah. Never mind.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I mean- I mea- I-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What do you have against gay people? I'm serious to hear this. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's just unnatural and it's against God's will. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, it's not like it's a choice. You can't change who you are like- you're a creative guy but I mean they're just gay. They can't change that. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm just answering a few questions mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You don't have to answer. Nobody's payin' you to do that.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yes they are.<br />
<br>''[shuffling sounds, clanging]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> It ain't none of their business no-way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I wouldn't be asked questions like that by employers or anybody. Don't tell people what you d- what you think. Keep that to yourself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris what's hap- what's happening?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, obviously, my mother is offering her input.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Tell her you're just talking to some friends. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' I don't need no back talk from somebody on the other end of the phone.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear you, Mom. Hmm. Hmm. <br />
<br>''[scraping sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> These- these idiots don't have any brains or- they don't have any idea this way or that.<br />
<br>''[more banging, clanging and tumbling sounds. Sounds like washing up]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Is right now a bad time right now? I mean-<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Pixelblocks, Pixelblocks!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Someone's saying "Pixelblocks." <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you saying [[Pixelblocks]]?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>''[Chris's mom has been singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful singing voice, Chris.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[Audio cuts back in]'' -all the anxiety, causing you stress.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, well sometimes they don't; they can be peaceful.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Well, your mom and dad get the crappy end of the stick.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm, a lot of us do.<br />
<br>''[more clattering sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Yeah, just like this nasty mess over here that you guys left that I got to clean up.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm. ''[Audio cuts]'' -Yeah, I took care of my bills. I mean, not completely, but I took care of them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> What about going to, uh, Redmond?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> We! (Wii?) <br />
<br>[unintelligible, windows beeps]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[laughing]'' Yeah, sweetheart pool.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Mmhmm. ''[laughing]'' Like the other side of the pillow.<br />
<br>''[someone sighing. Clanging noises return after short absence]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' ...is all, I mean, living with your parents is okay bad-in today's bad economy, but at 26, come on. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Shut up, you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I'm being nice.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde isn't so bad a guy. He does bad things, but he's pretty cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah he's reformed. He's seen the error- Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How- how could he do that to Sarah? I mean- That's not right.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah. Well, that's like Luke... That's like Luke and Laura from General Hospital. I know that's like, before y'all's time, but, um... Luke was a rapist and she-he raped Laura and then, like, a few months later they get married. So... ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, I believe Clyde was trying to make amends from his past actions.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, but Chris, can you uh- can you forgive him?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Random Troll:'''</font> ''[whispering]'' White whale, holy grail! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Can you forgive a small-dicked Asian? Just a thought.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He's not Asian! <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm half-Asian, okay? My parents ''[unclear]'' I don't really wanna go into it. It's too bo-boring for you people. But this is why I ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you there? Just makin' sure, buddy.<br />
<br>''[clattering]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Move out.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Another Troll''':</font> Well, how do I do that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi there, my kitty. ''[In baby voice]'' Yes, there's a pretty kitty.<br />
<br>''[Someone speaking with a voice-synth]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hang on a second. I've got, like, a thousand different... Oh, Crass, why'd you do that?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Because. You can unban him but, yeah. I'm not gonna friggin' stand for that. <br />
<br>''[Sound of a vacuum cleaner]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> I (m j d?) do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I heard the "g" word.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um, is that a vacuum cleaner?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Yeah, sounds like it is.<br />
<br>[Trolls speak but are drowned out by vacuum]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ...room or something.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I think the vacuum cleaner... <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If that's the government trying to do some kind of thing, then my name's Rusty Shackleford.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's a loud fan.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I have a fan above my stove, too.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Hey... I do, too.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Wait- wha- wait. You-you-you're in the kitchen? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Me too.<br />
<br>''[possibly Sonic game sound effects]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmhm? Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I'm pretty sure it's already asked, but I didn't catch the answer. When can we expect the next Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I-I-I told you my suggestion of releasing a page a day or something. I mean, it's a pretty good one. It-it-it allows for a good time. Finish a page a day. You upload it. You know? It's very good. Works very well.<br />
<br>''[Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh. I mean- you guys keep asking when he's going to finish it but I wonder how many pages are going to be in the new one? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> The last one was like, thirty. Just release it over the span of a month. Works fine. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...go up to ninety thousand...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[mutters something]''<br />
<br>''[Sound of Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Down by the river...side.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful voice, Chris.<br />
<br>''[clattering, typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[unclear, repeating the same two phrases]'' Gone down by the river, down by the water side, down by the riverside. Down by the waterside. Down by the riverside.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember ''[unclear]''<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -I'm hungry myself.<br />
<br>''[some kind of alarm sounding]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Then go eat.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I already ate.<br />
<br />
===Anime And Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I wonder what anime Chris watches nowadays. There's not many on television but do you still watch Japanese cartoons? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[In a bad accent]'' Kawaii desu ne. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I want to watch Shuffle. He said it was very good. He said it was sad. I don't know if I wanna watch- I don't like sad stuff. I like to be happy when I watch anime.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, and um, do you watch stuff like Bleach and um Code Geass or Naruto or something?<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I'm glad to hear that Shuffle isn't sad. I'm definitely going to watch it sometime.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um, yeah Chris that was a good call on Naruto. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah there's a lot of people who don't like it much either. Too popular.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But please. Please. Hope. ''[audio cuts out briefly]'' Uh, Chris, please consider When They Cry.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Ooh, I saw that one. It was a really good series.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, I know; that was good, like- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah. Both seasons of it. <br />
<br>''[Windows beeps, voices overlapping]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I could link you to Season One if you want. Yeah, Samantha got me into that. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...you'll give it a try, Chris. It's a very, very good series.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Hm. Hey, Julie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...lots of ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Watch Shuffle. You got the six episodes of Shuffle or... Which o- which anime? I'm sorry. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh and JoJo's Bizarre Adventure is also cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I really liked JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. Very ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Za warudo!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah, I think Shuffle is quite all right. I like Heidi. She's sweet and loyal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> That's a good one. One of my favorites is Black Lagoon.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris have you ever seen La Blue Girl?<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other about different anime]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, uh, Chris can I, my, uh, I don't know if it's all right, but, like, could you like, give me an email sometime? I could, uh... recommend you to... this anime that... Polly and... Julie like to watch. They're quite- they... Oh, C-and Cogs has recommended such great anime. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[talking to his mother]'' Yeah? That's ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> As well as Julie-Julie's the person that got me into anime.<br />
<br />
===People Love Poketunes===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> -we can go into this later cause I got my headphones on. And, Mom, you know what something else? They liked your singing.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> What? I don't sing.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> That's my laugh; that's my laugh. They couldn't hear me. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They heard you. Singin'. Just now.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I can't sing!<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I'm tone deaf. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They just heard you singing, and liked your voice.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay. Did you write checks for all those bills and pack everything ''[unclear]''?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yes, Mother, I did.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You're not telling me no story?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm not telling you no story.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> OK. It's important [''inaudible''] did you pay them?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, I paid that one. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay, you have to be honest with me, 'cause, see, you're settin'...<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm being honest, I'm being honest.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> How you respond to what [we] talk about. You say you ought to something and you don't do it then that's gonna change my ideas ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay... I'll be sure to pay the remaining differences next month.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> No, this month.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I know but I couldn't pay them all with 90 dollars so there's still some left ''[sound cuts]'' ...oh, you're cooking them up here, okay, that's why you turned the fan on over the stove.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br>''[Trolls rejoice and mock Momma Chandler]''<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 1|Mumble Chat 1]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 3|Mumble Chat 3]]|}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Spanish]]<br />
==Links==<br />
*[https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBOVVDS0JtSDNvMWs Download]<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_2&diff=163009Mumble 22012-09-26T21:13:17Z<p>Irisviel: /* Nudes On YouTube */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{Articleofthenow}}<br />
[[Image:0839-MomDesi.JPG|thumb|right|180px|In Mumble 2, a Wild [[Barbara Chandler|Snorlax]] appeared.]]<br />
<br />
'''Mumble 2''' is the second [[Mumble]] chat that took place on 4 [[February 2009]]. More than an hour long.<br />
<br />
This is a more organized Q&A type chat than [[Mumble 1]]. Questions from [[Clyde]] about [[sex]] in the [[comic]] and interesting tidbits about how Chris believes sex is the same as romance. This is pretty hard hitting, with stuff like how Chris is into [[McDonald's|fast food]] yet he's against tobacco. A lot of drama involving Clyde.<br />
<br />
Length: '''1:49:17'''<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
<br />
===Notes===<br />
* Chris doesn't like Clyde because he stole his sweetheart.<br />
* Audio cuts out for a minute before Chris says: "...HYMEN!" (You broke her hymen)<br />
* Trolls claim [[Panda]] is with Clyde, Chris wants to hear her voice, they say she's busy<br />
* 'She and I WERE very close'<br />
* Chris didn't have $400-$800 to go and see Panda; claims he got this number from an airport website recommended by [[Miyamoto]]<br />
* Insists on [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] being in ''[[Animal Crossing]]''<br />
* Doesn't want to talk about his deal with them<br />
* Insists that he doesn't have to turn down his radio since his voice is louder (''it is horribly loud in the mic'')<br />
* Panda gave Clyde all of the sites, etc.<br />
* [[Sarah]] is going to be with Clyde, which Chris wants to deny<br />
* These motherfuckers keep talking over each other<br />
* Calls a troll's critique crap<br />
* [[Bubbles]] must be aroused, she isn't wet all the time<br />
* Bubbles is 90% water so does sperm just swim around forever? NO<br />
* Clyde: This is a children's comic, why so much sex?<br />
: '''Chris:''' It is romance. My best artwork is when they're making out 'romantic moments', drawn in protest to trolls. Shows that [[Rosechu]]s have vaginas, not [[duck]]s.<br />
* Admits to maybe going overboard<br />
* Trolls try to reason with him about the [[ED]] article: There wouldn't be an article if he didn't react like he does.<br />
* Trolls say that TV-Y7 means NO SEX but Chris points to romantic anime that have making out (cartoons are for kids, whatever the content).<br />
* Trolls talk about Japan being less strict about those things<br />
* Everyone gets to vote in [[CWCville]], even if they're [[Niggos|black]].<br />
* Got his idea from [[Mary Poppins]].<br />
* Troll tries to give historical background about cough medicine putting kids to sleep. Chris insists it was the lullaby that put them to sleep.<br />
* Discussion about Chris, 'gay message' sent by a troll<br />
* He calls Clyde a scoundrel<br />
* BELIEVE HIM HE IS STRAIGHT<br />
* Chris tries to speak Mexican at 20:50<br />
* Mexican speaks Mexican to him... he replies in Menglish<br />
* [[4-cent_garbage]] is located in Mexico<br />
* Someone says that he needs to improve his Mexican<br />
* Chris is against smoking, CWCville is smoke and alcohol free<br />
* Rehash of why [[tobacky]] is bad, his position on it, alcohol=bar fights<br />
* Chris's dad smoked and had several bypasses, has a pacemaker and has had heart attacks<br />
* Mention of his hair cuttings for his fans<br />
* Chris was doing math in his head, got in car crash.<br />
* Chris has taken college level math. Took trigonometry.<br />
* Trolls gang up on Clyde for stealing Panda<br />
* Time will tell when Chris will make the money he would have in the Nintendo deal<br />
* Trolls bash Clyde for his pot smoking <br />
* Chris doesn't watch news because it's bad news =(<br />
* Bashing of the Mexican<br />
* Chris can type 30 to 100 WPM, but can't type and talk at the same time<br />
* Chris says [[PSN]] is free though Clyde(?) points to the $1,000 Chris spent on PSN<br />
* Chris has been typing for 15 minutes now and it is VERY loud<br />
* Chris has been busy IRL therefore the comic release doesn't have a date<br />
* Someone points to nudes on [[YouTube]].<br />
* He does not have it on the YouTube, but he isn't going to take it anymore.<br />
* Claims some of the photos are photoshopped.<br />
* Clyde offers help to take ED page down.<br />
* Chris denies taking those pictures, doesn't want to talk about it, making him uncomfortable.<br />
* Some of the pictures are real. When questioned which ones are fake, Chris can't answer.<br />
* Chris hates Harry Potter because it was in competition with [[Pokémon]]!<br />
* Chris is too stressed to read Vivian's [[A Girl Who Brought Down the World|book]], but he likes the cover!<br />
* Polly, who has been talking the whole time is confronted by Chris who thinks she is a guy. Polly is upset. Chris apologizes.<br />
* [[Jimmy Hill]] has launched his Sonichu show<br />
* More Mexican talk at 55:10<br />
* Chris giggles and sighs happily when Cassie, another Mexican, compliments him and when she leaves he says 'Chiquita Bonita'<br />
* Rabbichoso talk (Sonichu.info)<br />
* Classic trolls are leaving Chris alone.<br />
* Chris likes Steel Angel Kurumi (''quote from [[Wikipedia:Steel Angel Kurumi|Wikipedia]]: often classified as ecchi due to the focus on fanservice and panty shots'')<br />
* Chris claims to be very strong, could beat Clyde up. Says he would show Clyde a [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force|Hard Day's Night]], and would give Clyde pain.<br />
* ShinyMarshtomp makes an appearance? Likes Rabbichoso<br />
* Chris likes to eat at [[Country Cookin]] (''like Golden Corral'')<br />
* Chris likes to imagine his first time. <br />
* Clyde says the first time is awful, Chris said it was because Clyde prematurely ejaculated<br />
* Watch porn with naked women to cure your gay<br />
* Guys sitting next to you = gay coming on to you<br />
* Falsion has been in the chat room and is afraid he is gay<br />
* A wild Snorlax appears<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
<br />
===Waiting for Chris===<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I can't wait to hear Chris! I'm a huge fan!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, goddamn these noodles are fantastic. Man, I wish I could eat like this everyday.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Have you eaten the rice balls?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no. These are noodles. These are-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Fan-fucking-tastic.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now they're all gone, it's fantastic, you know?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Sweetangie is Chris. Or, we think so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's definitely not the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm disappointed there's so many impostors out there. Kinda my fault, but, you know, if it weren't- ''[unintelligible]'' -hard to come by.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His mic was working last time he was here, just fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He usually capitalizes his words, like in every sentence.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is- I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Is it set to push to talk or something?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You better get us your email address Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah its push to talk. It's called push to talk. It's fantastic ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, just have him set it to voice activity. It works so much better that way.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Aww, he left.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> You guys are fucking idiots.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other again]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You guys scared him off by being guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, you fucking jackasses. Nice going.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Was that even the real...?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yes, that was the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He's too much of a pussy to talk.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, cause you scared him, or some- No, or he's too stupid to be.<br />
<br>''[Trolls Laugh]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Arrives===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Chris arrives, with radio playing loudly]'' Hello.<br />
<br>''[Trolls all greet him]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, now-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Why haven't you got your microphone working?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't know why my microphone [is] messed up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry, but we had an impostor here before.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm registered. I've got myself registered now. So, uh, hopefully-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> That's probably why. It had to like, uh- calibrate.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Well, I'm calibrated now.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So, Chris, have you seen Rabbichoso, it's fantastic.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't give a crap about your stupid pencil sketch.<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am not listening. I do not have to listen to ''you''.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Why, I'm not understanding [inaudible]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well for one thing,and I'll say it on here, you stole my sweetheart!<br />
<br>''[Cutout continues]''<br />
<br />
===PandaHalo, Trip to Redmond and Animal Crossing===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You broke her hymen!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I know it's a terrible mistake, but I plan to make it up to her. I'm getting married and uh- I'm doing the things I should do.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh and another thing, if she is really over there with you now, then put her on the mic. Please.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> She's not- He never said-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, Chris, she's very busy, OK. She's very busy.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's not over here right now. Okay? So lets drop it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, fine. Well could you tell her to please send me a message lettin' me know, for sure, so I can know- so I can know to-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' I'll let her know whatever you want, but it's her life. She doesn't have to send you a message. You failed her. You failed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' She and I were very close.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If you we're so close, then why didn't you go?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' Because I had- Aw, hang on a second. How do I- oh, that's right. This thing. Right. Mmm. Hold on a sec. Oh yeah, because I did not have four to eight hundred dollars!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It doesn't cost that much to go cross-country man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes it does. I know, I saw it on an airport website. Where I was be- Where I was- recommended to me by Mr. Miyamoto.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, you can drive there. It's not that hard.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened with that? I thought, um, didn't you have a deal with them or something? I heard a rumor that your characters were going to be in Animal Crossing.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, they are in Animal Crossing. And I did- and I do- I did have a deal with them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened though?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' I'd rather not say.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Radio, Clyde and Criticism===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, why don't you turn down the TV? It's hard to hear you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Annoyed sigh]'' I do not have a TV turned on in here.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I can hear it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have a radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I hear something in the background.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Burping throughout sentence]'' Well that's the- that would b- the radio. And it is not that loud.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But it shows up pretty well on your microphone mic. With due respect.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But still, my voice is louder than the radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Ah goo- ahh given.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh, Chris? Uh, when are you going to do the new Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something over Polly]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' Uh, I'll answer Polly's question. I'm not sure. It's, uh, it's in progress right now, I'm drawing it up.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I can't wait to read it!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Well, we'll see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Listen, Clyde kind of has admin on here, so we can't really do anything about him. So, yeah. I don't know.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Hard to hear over Chris's radio]'' ...with you guys. I love you guys. Just as much as Chris loves you guys. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I was angry. I was angry. But I'm calm now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't try to hurt any other person from now on.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm doing the best I can. I'm doing the best I can.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have much- I do not have much to say in response to that right now. Because I'm ticked off.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't let him get to you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're no better than he is, if you give in.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris, I just wanted to let you know I'm a huge fan of the comics, and I'm glad you keep doing what you're doing. You're doing a great job, and just keep it up, alright man?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, yeah, I appreciate the, uh, what's the word I'm looking for? The, the, uh- well, the encouraging words. Encouragement. I appreciate the encouragement. Well, there are things, uh- I- er- current events I do not appreciate. I appreciate the positive encouragement.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I can't really do anything. He took over the IRC channel. I used to be the owner. I mean Clyde. He's like taking over everything.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, it was because Panda gave it to me, you know. But anyway, I mean, you can't just listen to encouragement, you've got to listen to criticism, man. Criticisms are what make you better, you learn from your mistakes. You learn from mistakes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Be right back guys, my wife is calling.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I don't- I don't- Tons of people don't like the Rabbichoso art style, but you know, I gotta improve on that. That's something I plan to improve on. There's a lot of criticism in the death of Sonichu, right? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What? What did you just say?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a lot of criticism of Sonichu. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. For a moment there I thought you said something different.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What, what did you think I said? I'm just saying, there are people who like it and people who don't like it. You gotta start taking in those suggestions. You know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. So many things that will be improved upon. But, I just have to hear from Sarah herself that she really is going to be with you, Clyde. I have to hear it from herself. It's one thing to hear it from you and then it's- then on that note, it's just I find it very hard to believe. So I have to hear it from her.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I kinda think that Rabbichoso sucks. I mean, I think it could be funny, but it honestly looks like it's drawn by a kindergartner.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, Sonichu has evolved over the years. You can see that the art's getting better. Rabbichoso doesn't even look like something a beginner would do, honestly. I mean, ''[Interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A whole bunch of crap!<br />
<br>''[Everyone starts talking at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, Sonichu is in color.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I know, I accept his criticism. But you just called it crap! Now that's just rude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have emotions going behind me- uh, behind that opinion.<br />
<br />
===Cassie===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, did you get my message.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Aren't you going to be the gentleman, then? Aren't you gonna be the gentleman?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I just want to ask you, Chris. I'm Cassie's friend. She- she's worried sick about you. Why haven't you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did email her! As a- I- I haven't gotten any re-plies from her. I have emailed her and I have instant messaged her on A.I.M. and Skype. I haven't heard back from her. I don't know what's going on there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> ...you emailed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> When was the last time you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, hang on, I'll check.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris? I have a question. My fa- One of my favorite new characters is, um, Simonla, and like, I also like Zapina as well. Um, are they gonna have bigger parts in the series later on?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, could you repeat that question?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I was wondering if Simonla and Zapina will either have bigger parts in the series later on. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [[Sonichu_10#The_Final_Countdown|Possibly]]. Possibly, but, uh, I can't say for sure. Oh, and, uh, to answer your question, uh- in answer to, uh, I believe, uh, Screwhead, who asked? It was about four days ago. About four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Yeah. Four days ago? Okay, I'll tell her to check it out.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> The last email I sent was about four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> She'll contact you in a while, though.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I'll tell her to check it out and- and thanks Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright. Mm.<br />
<br />
===Bubbles's Pussy and Sex in the Comics===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris? I have a question.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, my favorite character is Bubbles, I kinda liked the, uh, the thing she had going with Blake, where she was kind of keeping the relationship secret. I thought that was kinda clever. I was wondering, uh, she's a water-type, so does that mean that her vagina is always wet, or does she have to be aroused like a normal woman?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, aroused. That's applied for all the, uh, Rosechus there. And also, like, you know, she's not just a water-type, she's also- she's a water- and electric-type, like uh- oh, shoot- What's the name of that one? Originated from Gold-Silver-Crystal series, uh, evolves from Chinchou? Lanturn. And she has, uh, she has Volt Absorb ability.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, Chris, another question following Bubbles. Uh, her body is 90% water, and now this thing about the whole sexual intercourse- about it. Now, don't take this rude, and you don't need to answer me... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...I totally respect your creative work. My wife actually got me into this, uh, show actually. So, what happens is- like, as you know, like, semens are like little fishes in themselves. Would that mean, I mean, would they actually have a route to fly into the egg, in theory, or do they just swim around her whole body, just forever just swimming around.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. The, uh, the internal or- the internal organs uh, for the Rosechus are pretty much the same thing, so I'd say pre- about, uh, as good chance as most any other mammal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, so you mean she's able to control her density a little bit more. She- I understand now. She's able to control more her density from the 90% water. Okay. That pretty much answers it just perfectly. That's been bothering me at work. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I got another question, Chris, about this whole sexual thing. I mean, this is a children's comic, right? Why is there so much sex in it?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. It's called romance, and my- and my- if you'll notice throughout the comics my best pieces of artwork among which were those where dey were kissing and making out. Romantic moments.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a hidden page-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' And because- and because- and because of the tension from, uh, the trolls and Encyclopedia Dramatica, I just felt like doing that in protest against them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, but childre-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' Yes but how is that really a protest? That, you know, you know, are, are you like referencing to the 60's when women burned their bras? That was in protes- That was feminism. Saying that they weren't slaves to men. Do you even understand the whole thing?<br />
<br>''[Multiple voices are heard at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Now, to tell you the truth, I never really thought about, I never really thought about that when I-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Chris]'' Then how is, stripping was, how was that protest-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Jack]'' It shows that they have vaginas and NOT dicks. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well you know the dick thing was the fact that they were just, you know, mocking you. I think you went overboard with that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well maybe I did. Maybe I did. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, you did, because that seems kind of excessive, kind of-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' I don't think they would have even bothered to write about an article about you if you didn't just keep reacting like that.<br />
<br />
===Chris justifies sex in a kids' comic===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I have another question.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The point some of us are trying to make is, if it's TV-Y7 that means there should really be no sex in it at all.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible over other people]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's pretty much incorrect, I mean, uh, there's so many romantic anime that's TV-Y7, and they shoul- they have making out.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, a lot of things in Japan, Japan has stricter standards-not stricter, I mean looser guidelines than America. It's much different.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear ya.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I was just wondering what Bubbles, um, she has a, that water whirlwind attack, I was just curious if you had any plans to make- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Butting in]'' By the way, that was a Whirl- Whirlpool.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font>Yeah, Whirlpool, sorry, sorry, Whirlpool, but do you have any plans to mix an, uh, Electric-type attack with that, since water conducts electricity, right? It could be a very powerful-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah, she did, she did an electric attack amongst the- the walls of that Whirlpool and she let out. In case you didn't know, there's a- little bits of lightning bolts among which-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, oh, I'm sor- I didn't notice that, I'm sorry, I'll go take another look. Thank you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hey Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> You make some pretty sweet Little Big Planet levels.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you.<br />
<br />
===Chris on Benadryl babysitting===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, there's a message from Cogs on the side, it's about, uh, do women not have the right to vote already in CWCville.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, evry- Everybody, no matter what age, no matter what gender or race, everybody has the right to vote in CWCville. Even if they're black.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Then what's up with the "Votes for Women" thing, I was-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Not just vote women, but- ''[interrupted]'' any other ethnicities, and gays?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't understand-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did that- heard it in Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What? Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, man, Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, yeah, that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's a classic. It's my favorite movie of all time.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that movie was, like, based in the 1900s.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but still I- still I agreed with that message there-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Taken out of context, that makes it seem like CWCville's set in the 1960s.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What message? That children should be given cough medicine so they'll go to sleep?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''What?''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that's what women used to do back in- That's what mothers, friggin' nurses and stuff used to do to kids in the 1900s, is give children, like, you know, cough medicine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Cause- cause the medicine- uh, correction, the medicine did not put them to sleep, there was a lullaby, not the cough medicine. They only had to take the cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ...because it rained, before dere, and it was not, and it was to, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Rain means cough medicine doesn't have anything to do with each other. That's not how friggin' germs are spread, or colds are gotten. Colds are gotten through germs, not the rain.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How is cough medicine any different from today's parents that just let their kids watch TV until they fall asleep? I mean, it's just as bad.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well- Cough medicine has a lot to do with the psychological effects of it. Obviously if you get- if you keep giving fre-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Thanks, Samantha, that was delicious.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's my, uh, Samantha-<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, that's we're all saying, cause I've heard that there's a lot of different chemicals in cough medicine. You could pick up a ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I don't even take cough medicine, because I'm not a pussy.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Anyway, I never put any references, I never did any references or plan any references to cough medicine or anything of that sort.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Well, Chris, Cassie says the last e-mail she got from you was on the 17th. How 'bout your being gay? Is that true?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[sigh]'' That wa- That was somebody had- That was Clyde hacking through my e-mail and spammed that to my contacts.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, I definitely did not do that-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You're a scoundrel-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -a slanderous lie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I did not do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Whoa-whoa-whoa. Wow. Well, thanks for that. She was worried that you were- that you don't like her.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> You're a scoundrel, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't do that. That was someone else.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I was wondering, because I've heard other news too, I was really hoping that you weren't gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Believe me, I'm straight.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I'll take your word for it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you. And, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Cogs- Cogs got a way- she showed us that, okay? I mean, you only ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br />
===Chris's fail-riffic Spanish===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So, Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, Screwhead's from Mexico. I heard you like Spanish, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hola, Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You know Spanish, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí. Conoso Mexico. Tomé dos años ''[unclear]'' mi escuela secundaria. (Yes, I know Mexico. I took two years [in, possibly] my secondary school.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has venido en Mexico? (Have you come to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, lo siento? (Uh, I'm sorry?)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has estado en Mexico? (Have you been to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Estoy Mexico? No. (I am Mexico? No.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[slowly]'' Has estado, um, in Mexico. Has venir? (Have you been to Mexico? Have gone?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Uh, no, I hav- no, no tengo pansars. ''[sic]'' (no, I don't have pansars (?))<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I think, uh, I think I meant to say- I'm pretty sure-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Did you just say you don't wear pants?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, no, I was trying to say, ah, I don't have plans to go in Mexico at the moment.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's what I understood what he was saying there.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, did you know that, that 4-cent garbage website is located in Mexico?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> That's why-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, that's why they can't get it shut down.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]'' borders, plus it's cheaper to run sites over there; they have, like, several servers.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wanted to talk to you, but she couldn't make it here, well, and, she wants to be your Spanish teacher, because she says that you've got room to improve your Spanish.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Oh, that Cassie. Yeah, I'm sorry, I thought you were- I got mixed up. Um... Yeah, um, I'm sorry, I, uh, I haven't talked to that- I haven't talked to Cassie in a while, but I've been mostly talking to, uh, her gal- her, uh, gal-pal and I'm sure- I'm sure she'd tell you a lot about her...<br />
<br />
===In which the trolls discuss bar fights===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey Chris, how- how does Sonichu keep Rosechu from spending more than a hundred dollars at the mall? I've always wondered how he could manage to do that. I've always had problems with that myself.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That wa- That time at the mall, it was, uh, Kel loaned the credit card. And it's like, yeah- she gave- she gave Sonichu the responsibility of that credit card. She did.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I've always given my advice on cannabis, you should do the ''[unintelligible]'', Cogs Chris, but I think she wants your response.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, one of my friends sent me this picture, and I think you might find it kinda disturbing just because they say it's proof that you're gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Aw yeah, I saw that, that's just a crappy Photoshop.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No, that one doesn't- this one doesn't look Photoshopped at all.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'm not gonna look at it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Oh, you're not? Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, uh, you say you're against smoking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. As a matter of fact, CWCville is a smoke-free, non-alcoholic city.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[partially drowned out]'' That's what we call a totalitarian state...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, and, uh, in the pilot episode with Seth MacFarlane, of, you know, Family Guy? He's always smoking. What do you think about that?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Go smoke.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I just- I just take that with a grain of salt, and, uh, you know, that's what-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, if he can smoke, why can't anyone else? I mean, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Because it causes cancer!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> So does a lot of things.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> It could be a prop pipe.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> In any case, I'm not- in any, in any case I've never done it and I never will.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, but eating too much fast food can give you a heart attack. I mean... so many things are deadly for you.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What about fast food, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> My father used to smoke and he went through a whole bunch of heart attacks. He suffered three- <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Well, I think that might have to do more with his weight.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He suffered through three or four triple bypasses.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I think that's... that's more like a weight issue.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He has a pacemaker!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, eh...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey ya guys, leave him alone. Ya know, my granddad, he smoked most of his life. He quit for 25 years and still died of lung cancer. I mean that's just the way it is. And your body never gets rid of it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, what about ''[pause]'' Chris, what about fast food? That's- that's bad for you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey Chris. Chris, could you do me a favor and send an email to Cassie? She's very worried about you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Yeah sure, I'll send her an email later.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, thanks.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, I've got uh, a certain someone you know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No no.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -she has to, uh, she wants to ask you w- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Also, she said something about some hair.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh yeah. Yeah, that's uh... that's another issue right there. Um, hmmm. I'll talk to her about that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, does, uh, drinking cause cancer?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, but it causes liver dysfunction and likely bar fights and automobile accidents.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, bar fights, but— <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Bar fights!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> -but I don't think that bar fights are that big of a problem.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I think bar fights are awesome.<br />
<br>''[People agree bar fights are awesome]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> But bar fights are bad. I got into a bar fight once and one of my hands got cut and two fingers from my left hand. Bar fights suck.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well, I think that might be more because you're Mexican. Are you sure you didn't lose them picking bo- picking grapes and- or something?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> No, Mexican people are more more- more much macho man; we get into bigger fights. We're more awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No- I think it might be because you got your hands stuck in some machinery when you were out picking in the vineyards.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't know about you guys, but I like- I like having bar fights.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Crashes Due To Math===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't have to be drunk to be in a bar fight or in an automobile accident, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but they increase the likeliness of it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You've been in an autobile— automobile accident, I mean, were you drunk?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I was distracted.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Uh, by what? I mean, it's kinda hard to be dist— you gotta be focused on driving man-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I was doing math in my head.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, math in your— <br />
<br>[Trolls talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> My mind got distracted by being its own calculator.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Are you good at math?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, is that for school?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Are you some kind of savant?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's impossible.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Guys, you're getting ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you like a mathematic genius or something?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> You know some artist people have like superpowers in their head. They can do like geniuses and add really well. ''[interrupted briefly by Jack saying something else about savant]'' Chris you are already an artist. Do you have any like, magical powers?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, I heard autistic people are really good at math. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Well not all the stereo- some of that sounds like stereotypes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[talking over Chris]'' ...it has to do with mental ability; I mean, what's the...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean I don't know- I mean I'm not saying that I'm a total genius. I mean I know- I know enough to get by.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What's the highest level of math you've taken Chris?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> College level.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I mean like algebra, or calculus or...?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. I believe I just did trigonometry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Very impressive.<br />
<br>[long pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So I was wondering. When did you get the CAD degree? I figured it's like a fine arts degree or something? I mean wha-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I designed a whole- I designed buildings and machinery and such along there. I designed the whole CWCVille shopping center.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don't you have a job then?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Your fans would love to see that Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' -I mean use that to design like, actual buildings? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I think I just told you I designed the CWCVille sho-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I don't mean in your comic. I'm just saying-<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde Isn't Popular And Chris Should Program===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well it's a good st-<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I heard you got some nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'll be putting an update on da YouTube soon, but not right now. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking maybe you could like, you know, get a degree in game design and make the Sonichu game? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah man, it's not that hard to learn programming. C++ man.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">''Falsion:'''</font> Clyde, he hates you, why are you talking?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm just giving him some advice, I mean C++ is-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you here? We don't like you. You totally ruined Chris's life.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't ruin his life. He ruined his own life.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yes you did. You've ruined his life. You raped his girlfriend. <br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks at once over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If he was the man he said he was, he'd have gone to Nintendo, made all that money. How- how are you going to make money now Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Time will tell.<br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks again]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, time will tell Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font>''[unclear]'' -need a plan, you know? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking uh, if- uh- would you be interested in getting a degree in game design. Making the game or something? Like if you had to? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Maybe but uh- I still have things to sort out in my real life.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah it's kinda unfortunate what happened with the Nintendo thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah- hang on a second, I'll be right back. Mm- ''[clattering]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So be honest guys am I really that much of a bother. I mean...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah you kind of are.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like a total dickfart.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You realize weed causes cancer? <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I didn't know that. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> And it causes the munchies. You're gonna get fat, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's okay, man, because I work out.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Do you play Guitar Hero standing up?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I play Guitar Hero while on the treadmill. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Will the Sonichu game be a- ''[muffled]'' -or a Wii one?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> It be a Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Wii would like to play. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh. I only got a DS. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I heard you are very good at HTML. Why don't you make a HTML Sonichu game? That would be awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't think you can make a game in HTML.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A- anyway I came back...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hey, Chris? How many courses did you have to take to get that degree in CAD? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -pretty sure you can make a game in HTML-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[speaking over]'' I'm took abo- took about two- took about two years to four years. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, if you can write HTML you can write C++, make your own games. Pretty simple man. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well it's something I'll consider. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde why are you talking to him? He hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm trying to give him some suggestions. I'm not insulting him, OK? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> HTML seems kinda outdated, so to speak. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font>I learn- I took two HTML classes so at least I know how to do- at least I know the ins and outs when it comes to like, workin' on it in the raw data- in the notepad.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> So you don't use Dreamweaver?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I also use Net- also use Netscape composer. <br />
<br>''[Someone starts singing 'Dreamweaver']''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I heard they went bankrupt or something.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't- I don- I don't listen to news because I don't care about bad news. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But that's not bad news that's just safety...<br />
<br>''[Talking over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why you gotta bring this bad vibe in here? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> OK OK I'll chill, I'm sorry it's just my wife- ''[can't hear over Chris typing extremely loud]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris you don't hear about these ones in a while. Like yesterday some guy in my town got run over by a train and he- he died. And that's a really bad thing, you know but you have to hear about it. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yeah but that's because you're Mexican. You Mexicans always play around the train tracks, what's with you? <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No come on, don't be racist.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> It's because Mexicans are stupid. I'm surprised I can use a computer. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' CrassCrab why do you have to be so mean?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> 'Cause my mother was raped by a Mexican. And I'm part Me- ''[muffled]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry man.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> That isn't fair to take it out on every other Mexican out there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His rule applied to millions. Just ignore him.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No I'm not my mother was raped by Mexicans.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> CrassCrab I'm tired of listening to you, get out of here. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Not all Mexicans are like that we- we- I am a nice Mexican guy. Not all Mexican guys are- ''[drowned out by typing]'' -Black guys are the people you should fear.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't get me started on them. But that will be another day. Cause I'm sick of hearing bad news.<br />
<br />
===Chris Types Fast (And Hates Hex-Box)===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris what are you uh- typing there?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm typing a email. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> How many words can you type? How fast can you type? Sounding fast there. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhh say about uh- sorta between thirty and a hundred. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's quite a good range man. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like "The Flash", minus the red jump-suit.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh Chris um- I was wondering if- ''[unclear]'' -game with Nintendo, would it be uh a Wii game or a DS game or both. I only own DS and I don't have any money for a Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[overlapping]'' Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wii, DS and Pla- hopefully uh- possibly uh, PlayStation 2 or 3. Never on [[Hex_Box|Hex-Box]]. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> When you gonna do this shit?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Why don't you like the Hex-Box? I mean I have an Xbox, I would love to play online with you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'd like to say this. Before Chris says anything about that I just wanna say that today my wife came home from the mall shopping for her usual clothes, that Gucci purse I had to buy for her. You know what she came home with? I wanted a PS3 but you know what she gave me was a frickin' Xbox 360. The Elite one? ''[someone speaks over]'' I know, I kept telling her like "Honey this isn't what I wanted. I wanted the PlayStation 3 so I can play LittleBigPlanet, Metal Gear Solid and Sonic Unleashed" <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You can put Sonic Unleashed on the Hex Box as well as Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Too whiny to make out]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Nintendo just- rejected your offer? Cause I- I heard a rumor that there was going to be a Sonichu game or something. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris uh. Cassie wants you to send her your Wii number so she can talk to you on the Wii. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright uhhhhh. I'll get- have to get my Wii number now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Send it to her in an email please.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they completely hate Sony. And they hate Microsoft as well. I mean this guy, Reggie? He always talks about kicking their ass and stuff. He's kinda crazy. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I know. Reggie's very mean he never brought out Mother 3 to America. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah I wanted to play that game.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talked over]'' -I'm tellin' you guys. Reggie's just a great ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Like what?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can- I can't say anything OK but... you'll see. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah so I don't think like if you got the deal with Nintendo I don't think they'd put it on like mu- like anything else but the Wii or DS. Yeah, cause that Reggie guy he frickin' hates Sony. And Microsoft. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wasn't he also the head of VH1?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or Pizza Hut.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. What are your favorite places to eat at? <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember um Peter Moore he used to - ''[unclear]'' -but before that he was with Sega when Dreamcast was out. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yup. Let me type this email please. I mean y'all keep talking I'll just listen. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's no reason to hate the Xbox. To be honest.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or um- Chris um- do you wanna release your game on Nintendo and on Sony. If you do talk to somebody like EA or something, you can like do um- multi-console thing like a third party thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[busy typing]'' Hmm. Well it's all to think about. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I mean Sega does third party now so um- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah well I'm gonna keep typing this email here. Y'all keep talking. <br />
<br>''[Sound of Chris typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's true, it's true. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Chris I wanted to tell you that Cassie's going to be here any- any second so you can talk to her. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Hm. ''[continues typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Don't you care about her? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[annoyed]'' I'm typin' da email to her right now! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah um 360 is pretty bad it um- red-rings all the time. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> I've had mine over two years. The same one. And it has not red-ringed yet. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Dude you have to pay $50 just so you can play online. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[echoing]'' Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah it's bullshit.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah it's totally free on PlayStation. And Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris. Chris. No, no, no, no, I gotta talk about this. [long pause] Chris...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupting]'' I get less connection problems myself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can't let you get away with this Chris. You spent over $1000 on the PlayStation Network. OK? And you say you can't afford $50 for the Xbox? Terrible reason. That's a terrible reason. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, um, Cogs I had a friend of mine whose red-ringed a lot of times. She did not like it at all. She got herself a PS3 instead. <br />
<br>''[Chris is STILL typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I heard that like- the PS triple eats up a lot of energy and like- has cau- has like- burned houses down. Cause it messes up the- no but the PS3 really- <br />
<br>''[More of Chris typing then audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So when's the next comic coming out Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I can't say. I don't have a date for it right now. I've been busy with the- with real life and such. You know getting the s- getting the website back up and all that. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh but I've been waiting so long. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I gotta tell you something Chris. ''[unclear]'' -to the trolls but I haven't done anythin' myself. It's run off into splinter groups doin' stuff to you. Ever since the Panda thing, I haven't done anything to you man. Everybody's been running round doing things. I have no control anymore. So I'm back here. This is why I'm back here. Do you understand? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. I hear you.<br />
<br />
===Nudes On YouTube===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I hear you got some uh- nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> What? <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hear you got some nudes on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Dudes?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Nudes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> That's what I thought- I have nothing na- I have nothing like that on the nu- on the YouTube. I've nothing like that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh someone posted the pics from the ED page. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> They're just tryin' ta get on- they're just tryin' ta get on my nerves again. But I'm not gonna let 'em.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Did you take those pictures or what? Where'd they come from?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Uh, are they Photoshopped?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah most of- Yes. Most of them are Photoshopped.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I can help you with ED. Chris I can help you with ED.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You can see the neck and the body doesn't quite match up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, Chris. Cassie's just arrived. She's just a little nervous about talking to you, but she's gonna talk to you soon. Is that OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I just got one quick comment. Look, the ED people were in contact with me, but I've lost contact with them. But I know you can delete that page permanently. I'm tryin' to help you man. You can get that page down forever. Even the entire site. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What, after you raped um- Sarah? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I'm trying to make amends. So let me do my business. All right?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's too late to make amends. Look what you did.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look what Chris has done. Look at what Chris has done, okay? ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um. Cogsdev said she had a look at the data, they have it up in Image editing software.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah. Well...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I don't know what to tell you there. <br />
<br>''[Several trolls speak at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Doesn't that mean they're real? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I don't think so. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You don't think so?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Well, did you take them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Then where did those pictures come from? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who took those?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I don't know. And I'd rather not talk about that anymore. It's making me feel uncomfortable.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Are you lying to your fans Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> We don't feel confort- we don't feel comfortable. We're big fans of your work and we don't like being lied to. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I'd like to make a point. It might just be a doppelganger [sic].<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, you know the thing I hate most is lies. I like to spread the truth about you Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You say you're honest, but you're lying to us.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[clearly annoyed]'' Fine, fine. Some those pictures are real. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Some of them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Some of them but not all of them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Like, which ones aren't real?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'd rather not go into detail because I'd rather not look at 'em. Cause uh- ''[interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' -are you ashamed of it?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Do you not like to look in the mirror?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You owe it- you owe it to your fans.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, but- yeah, but- yeah, but upon looking at those it's like ref- it's like reflecting a pe- uh p- a past moment in my life where I- I was played for the fool. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah, by the man in the pickle suit?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh that guy- I hate that guy.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah I saw- he was trolling some other people you know? So you're not alone, Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he took pictures of me like that too...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That guy's an asshole, I hate him.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhhh yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He took pictures of my wife too. Sick bastard. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> He's a peanut.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br>[another pause]<br />
<br />
===Chris Hates Harry===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I just uh- never was fond of it. Ever since it came out, I was never fond of it. ''[unclear as troll speaks over]'' -just like I hate Harry Potter because he's s- he's goin- he's uh- in compe- was in competition against the world of Pokemon. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Well that- that doesn't make sense. But they're two different medias. Pokemon-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah but- yeah but still he-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> -Harry Potter is a book.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah but he poses as competition against them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> That's not really competition. I mean- <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talks over Jack]'' Oh that reminds me about books- Vivi- Vivian wrote a book and sent it to you. You never read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes. I am afraid I- yeah, yeah- I'm uh- I've been uh- so I've been under uh- too much stress between internet and all that. I'll ge- I'll read it, I'll read it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's been waiting for your response for quite a long time.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I like the cover. (pause) Nice cover.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he is right about that. That is a nice cover. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah the book is pretty good- I read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Well I- I will definitely make it a point to uh- read it. Very soon. <br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Audible over the others]'' Did you ever read Twilight?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I've heard th- I've heard Twilight and I've seen the trailer but I haven't seen the movie, I'll wait for it to come out DVD or Blu-ray.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br />
===Random Access Humor Python Style===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh OK, I heard a lot of girls like Twilight. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I see. Hey Polly does your voice sound like that, 'cause it sounds like [[BlueSpike|a guy talking falsetto]]. I mean no personal offense. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> That's not very nice...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm sorry. Believe me I didn't mean any pe- anything personal it's just like, you know- hm- kind- just kinda takes me by surprise a bit, that's all.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I knew a girl like that in high school.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Sounding upset]'' I can't help it if I'm born like this.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I'm- I'm- I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah she's a girl. I saw her pics. She's a girl.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I'll s- I'll take his word for it. I'm sorry I cu- I accused you there.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um. OK. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You know, aut- I mean- let's- it's just uh- you know it's uh- you know it's uh a bit- just a spot of fun. [[Random-access_humor|Stupid humor]]. Monty Python's Flying Circus. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> We know you love that. There's just so many references to it in the comic. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah I d- after they put all of the entire series on PlayStation Network I downloaded the Hamlet episode- that was the one that had uh- Jimmy Hill parodying himself. It also had this funny bit where it was like, you know- ''[in a stupid voice]'' "...and now it's time for The Robinsons, an everyday story about blah-de-blah-de-blah-de-blah. Dum-de-dum-de-dum-de-duhhh-dum-de-dum"- and so on...<br />
<br>''[A troll begins to speak but is interrupted by a very high-pitched Chris]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> "Morning Mrs. Robinson- Morning Mrs. Robinson. Comin' out shoppin'? Oh- you've been shoppin', what did you buy? What's this?-" 'What did you buy this for?'[Trolls laugh over him]'' -It was a bargain!"<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I've heard you do that before. I don't know where. Anyway uh- uhm- Whatever happened to Jimmy Hill? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I haven't heard from him in a long time so just assuming uh- he gave up or uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I think he got a- I think he got a, uh- children's TV program in England.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well he ain't botherin' me, so I'm not worried about him anymore.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Ye- but he's stealing Sonichu. Bastardizing it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah he did but uh- he s- but haven't seen any updates on his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' -profile, he's still doing it.<br />
<br>''[Several trolls talk over each other about him having a TV show]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Fails At Spanish Pt. 2===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' <br />
<br>''[Troll says something more about the TV show, but it's muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wants to say hi. Just forgive her English because she can't speak very well, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> All right. Just sent her the email by the way, just now. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Hey, Chris. It's me, Cassie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi, Cassie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Fine, and you?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm feelin' OK. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Why haven't you emailed me? I was really about-was really worried about you. What's happened? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry. I be- I've bee- I've been busy with the Internet and the stress and all that. I sent ya an email just now go- it's got my Wii number in it so you can add me to your contacts. I've been talking to uh- I've been talking to Sarah lot- quite a bit lately. She's been helping me with uh- updating the Sonichu site, since I've uh- since I'm working on uh- it's re-uploading and such. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Kay, I believe you. I going to check ''[pronounced like 'sheg']'' it, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You're going to where?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[very quietly]'' Check it.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> To check it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> To "shag-it"? Is that the-<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Check the email. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[still doesn't understand]'' Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> I going to check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, check email. ''[Laughs]'' Yeah I'm sorry I tr- I tried to uh- understand but it just kind of messed up a little bit. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don- why don't you two speak in Spanish?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhh. I'm not exactly fluent. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ¿Sabes hablar español, Chris? (Do you know how to speak Spanish?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí, hablo español. (Yes, I speak Spanish)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Oh. ''[pause, one of the trolls says something to her]'' Oh, eso es muy sexy. (That is very sexy.)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Ohhhh. Te gusta. Te gusta muchísimo, (You like it. You like it a lot)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> La verdad, si. (To tell you the truth, yes)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Me amos mis amigas muchísimas. Sons muy bueñas! (I love my friends (feminine) a lot. They are very good.) [Correction: Amo a mis amigas muchísimo. Son muy buenas.] <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Oh, eso es tan cool en español! Muy bueno! (That's so cool in Spanish! Very good)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Muy bueño (very good)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Aha, exacto. (it is!)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]'' Okay, that's good. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Well, I going down, okay?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Okay, you're going down- by the way, let me ask ya Cassie, do you ever- you've uh- you've actually met uh Sarah May in person, haven't you? <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Not. She's on Internet.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Okay. That's cool- but anyway uh- you got- you d- you have my Wii number, uh- you can reply the email with your Wii number and it'll be registered on the Wii network. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[very haltingly]'' Yes. So. Cool. Talk with you Chris. You are so cool. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Heh. Uhhhh. You flatter me. Tú me flatteray. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[Weak laugh]'' Well, see you. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[In his 'baby voice']'' Adiós. ''[sigh]'' <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós, bebé.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós, chiquita bonita. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>[Pause as audio cuts out]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -it again. <br />
<br>[Another pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So anyway, Chris. I've been working on Rabbichoso for a day and uh- I was just wonderin' like, it's- it's supposed to compete with the Sonichu, you know? If you weren't aware of that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhhh. I grabbed onto d- grabbed onto g I- grabbed onto the... that gist. I'm aware- I'm aware of the gist of the theory. Uh. I'm aw- I'm aware that you're- that you're tryin' to compete. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know what competition does. It's drives uh- it drives consumer interest- Well that's why you know- It's great. You have to compete with high quality things. ''[muffled]''- that's why I'm trying to help. You know, compete. Just so you're aware of this, OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I see. -see. <br />
<br>[Pause]<br />
<br />
===Rabbichoso And Animu===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris we've been ge- been getting uh threatening images from the Pickle Man. Did you s- did you see the left? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I've not heard from the Pickle Man in lo- in a long time. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Apparently there are multiple ones because this one is, uh, not a darkie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh-huh. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> It's good that they're leaving you alone now. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Seems like they found more easier targets. Seeing as how you became [[Navy|saltier]].<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh. You know I originally got that line- quote from an e- ep- episode of ExCel Saga. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> From what?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> ExCel Saga.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Oh, ExCel Saga. Oh, yeah, that's a good anime.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> AIII I-Falazzo! (''He means [[ScotPalazzo|Il-Palazzo]]'')<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, have you ever seen two animes, ''[muffled]'' and Schooldays?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I have not seen either of those. I like Steel Angel Kurumi as well.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, how much Japanese do you know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only a little bit. I'm not totally fluent. I can say that with all honesty. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something unintelligible, not quite Japanese]''<!-- It sounds like he's saying "You say you can't- can you speak with me?" in CHINESE. --><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Huh?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Never mind, you won't understand it.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[unclear] Chris-Chan. Genki desu-ka?''<br />
<br />
===Chris Could Kill Clyde===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, I just wanted to say, uh, you're doing a good job, like, keeping calm even though Clyde is here. I mean u- I thought you'd be, like, more angry at him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm being calm with you guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> -I would have been choking him by now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I'd have kicked his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Preach to the choir. Pr- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I'd make him choke on a pickle if it were up to me.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You guys can't touch me otherwise I'd kick all your asses. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, bring it.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris could kick Clyde's ass anytime.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Let's see Chris do it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Bring it to me any day of the week and I'll definitely show him a hard- day's night. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah I think you could kick his ass.<br />
<br>[Trolls and Clyde talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Sings]'' -been a hard day's night...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -never mind, just...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean that as a- meant that as in I would beat... him up. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Kick his ass?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm very strong. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. I'm gonna see you later, OK?<br />
<br>''[Unison of goodbyes]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> OK see ya. Thank you so much Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[ignoring his fans]'' Yeah I can- I can lift about my weight. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Like um- if Clyde were right in front of you, what would you do to him?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Like, what kind of style of fighting do you have?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, shut up.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I gotta know my competition. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Personal- in the physical offense. ''[sigh]'' I would definitely be giving you so much physical pain. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's not a s- that's not a style. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I would beat you up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He deserves it man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, that's still not a style...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He uses fisticuffs. He's a gentleman. Gentleman fisticuffs. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Whatever, I'll just see-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Stop arguing and just-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ''[Over previous troll]'' I mean, if he did that to my sweetheart I'd fucking kill him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well. He's not- he's not going to come over and kill me, I know that. He doesn't have the money. [pause] You know I'm surprised that you're mad here. You're much kinder in person I thought you- Now I'm just expecting you at my door anytime, just waiting for you to stand here with an axe or something. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Knives are too messy. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Ah, now a sword- sword's are usually better.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What about poison?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Poison's good, poison's good.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde, what- do you want him to beat your ass?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I was just expecting it, you know.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, you know what's another thing? I would definitely not tell you how I would be hurting you, but I would definitely give you a who- big amount of pain. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, he's gonna keep you guessin'!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he deserves it. After everything he's done-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Muffled by troll]'' -going to kill me, I'd like to know. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I'm just going to let you cover in- worry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh so you're never going to show up, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Oh yes I will show up. But you just won't be expecting it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't even know where I live, do you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Find out!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Maybe I should give you my address. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, you should track him down and kick his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> But I'm going to leave you guessing too...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Defend Panda's h- Panda's honor.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, hi Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> 'sup Julie.<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br>''[Everyone talks over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde's A Dick===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I notice her mic doesn't work. But still I'm just letting her know that- acknowledge her presence. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're doing well staying calm even though Clyde's here.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, Clyde's a total dick.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Fucker.<br />
<br>''[Rustling]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I mean, he's taken over everything. The IRC. This. I can't- no one can stop him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' -over there, so...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll:'''</font> I- I like Rabbichoso.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Of course you do. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll''':</font> It's funny. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I will not offer any new comment on it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, OK. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, when can we expect the next Sonichu to be released.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, we've been eager.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It'll be soon. It will be soon.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah just ignore Clyde man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean if you're going to put a hard date on it, you'd better deliver your promise. If you don't, I'll strike harder. That's all I'm saying.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. You're saying if I don't set a date, you're gonna...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no. I'm saying don't make promises you can't keep. Don't make promises you can't keep.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He'll choke you with his medallion bitch!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who the hell do you think you are?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I agree with Cogs over there. Maybe you should do just a page a day, not release all at once. Keep his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you telling him this when he hates you?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm giving him suggestions man, OK? OK?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Only thing he's gonna suggest to you is 'shut the fuck up'!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, seriously man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It's alright. <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Penny Arcade's slow.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh you mean like Penny Arcade or ''[unclear]'' or MegaTokyo?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they're just like- boring. Then they because sellouts. <br />
<br />
===Chris's Country Cookin===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Chris, where's your favorite place to eat?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. Can't really say uh- but I like country cookin'. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> What's country cooking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh no G's in the sto- no G's in the name by the way, no G. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah what's country cooking? I'm not familiar with that.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's like uh- som- something like Golden Corral. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But Golden Corral is a national franchise.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh Chris, how are your parents?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> They're OK.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br>[Long pause]<br />
<br />
===Sex Is Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I've got a sug- another suggestion. Now be quiet all of you cause I know you hate me. Just- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, Chris hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well don't defend him. He can defend himself OK? He's a man. But whatever-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let him speak.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm suggesting that- you go on and on about this sex stuff but you've never gotten laid, have you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I like to put myself in the imaginative situation that I'd like to be in and the sexual stimulation. So I can be ready for [[ego|myself]] for when I do actually have my first time.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well my first time was- I'll just say that it's terrible, OK? I didn't know what I was doing, she didn't know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let me guess, you prematurely ejaculated?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no, it's not like that you don't know what to do. Every woman's told me OK? You can't prepare-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Clyde]'' First time's always awkward...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -I learnt that mistake a while back, OK whatever. OK, you just- you can't prepare for your first time. You might as well just have a really bad first time so you learn from your mistakes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm not trying to defend Clyde or anything, but yeah it's kinda true. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Hmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The girl I first fell in love with is the girl I'm married to right now. Samantha just changed my world. But marriage does get boring.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Tips To STAY STRAIGHT===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I know how you say how important it is to stay straight, um- I'm having trouble staying straight, do you have any suggestions?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Watch a bunch of pornography with uh- with naked women. OK, a lot of naked women.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That happened to me one time...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, I have this friend I play video games with, is that gay? He's male by the way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry could you- I'm sorry could you repeat that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I have this guy I'm friends with he always comes over to my house to play video games. Is that gay? I'm kinda scared. You know? I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Hmm. Is he making any advances towards you? Personally. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I dunno how to tell. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Like uh sit- does he always sit next to you when he's playing games. Playing video games.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Yeah he usually does. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I see. Hmm. My- well- my suggestion in that case, would be to keep a heavy distance between you and that guy. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he meant anything gay by it though. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he means anything like- gay about it. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well, still- it's always best to find out- you can ask him. Don't be afraid to ask him. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> What would you do in this situation?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well if he said yes then I would uh- basically- let me think about that a moment. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you have any friends who're are like, guys?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only acquaintances and only a few of them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you play video games with people or anything? Do they come over to your house?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. No.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I remember-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> ''[Cuts Polly off]'' I'm just worried I might be gay or something. I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You probably are Falsion, but that's OK. No, look dude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Leave him alone! Leave him alone! He's straight!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Why?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Hey, let's have a calm conversation here. Let's not have any fights.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br>''[Trolls speak over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I've been reading the Sonichu comics and man, they are page-turners! Seri- I was on- I was on the edge of my seat for a while. I ju- I couldn't- I couldn't- you know. Just had to read and read.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Thank you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, can I be your friend? I know I'm a guy. I don't mean anything gay by it. Can I be your friend? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. I dunno. <br />
<br />
===A Wild Snorlax Appears===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Do you want any hotdogs?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I'm OK. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> No?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I was talking with my mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I was wondering if I could be your friend.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I h- heard you only like, you only like to be acquaintances. With guys. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, ummm. Let's just pretty much leave it at acquaintance. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hello Mrs. Chandler. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> She can't hear you, I'm wearing my earphones.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Listen, I'm not gay. I don't- you know- yeah. Never mind.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I mean- I mea- I-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What do you have against gay people? I'm serious to hear this. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's just unnatural and it's against God's will. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, it's not like it's a choice. You can't change who you are like- you're a creative guy but I mean they're just gay. They can't change that. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm just answering a few questions mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You don't have to answer. Nobody's payin' you to do that.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yes they are.<br />
<br>''[shuffling sounds, clanging]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> It ain't none of their business no-way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I wouldn't be asked questions like that by employers or anybody. Don't tell people what you d- what you think. Keep that to yourself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris what's hap- what's happening?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, obviously, my mother is offering her input.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Tell her you're just talking to some friends. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' I don't need no back talk from somebody on the other end of the phone.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear you, Mom. Hmm. Hmm. <br />
<br>''[scraping sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> These- these idiots don't have any brains or- they don't have any idea this way or that.<br />
<br>''[more banging, clanging and tumbling sounds. Sounds like washing up]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Is right now a bad time right now? I mean-<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Pixelblocks, Pixelblocks!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Someone's saying "Pixelblocks." <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you saying [[Pixelblocks]]?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>''[Chris's mom has been singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful singing voice, Chris.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[Audio cuts back in]'' -all the anxiety, causing you stress.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, well sometimes they don't; they can be peaceful.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Well, your mom and dad get the crappy end of the stick.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm, a lot of us do.<br />
<br>''[more clattering sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Yeah, just like this nasty mess over here that you guys left that I got to clean up.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm. ''[Audio cuts]'' -Yeah, I took care of my bills. I mean, not completely, but I took care of them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> What about going to, uh, Redmond?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> We! (Wii?) <br />
<br>[unintelligible, windows beeps]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[laughing]'' Yeah, sweetheart pool.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Mmhmm. ''[laughing]'' Like the other side of the pillow.<br />
<br>''[someone sighing. Clanging noises return after short absence]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' ...is all, I mean, living with your parents is okay bad-in today's bad economy, but at 26, come on. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Shut up, you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I'm being nice.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde isn't so bad a guy. He does bad things, but he's pretty cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah he's reformed. He's seen the error- Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How- how could he do that to Sarah? I mean- That's not right.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah. Well, that's like Luke... That's like Luke and Laura from General Hospital. I know that's like, before y'all's time, but, um... Luke was a rapist and she-he raped Laura and then, like, a few months later they get married. So... ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, I believe Clyde was trying to make amends from his past actions.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, but Chris, can you uh- can you forgive him?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Random Troll:'''</font> ''[whispering]'' White whale, holy grail! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Can you forgive a small-dicked Asian? Just a thought.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He's not Asian! <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm half-Asian, okay? My parents ''[unclear]'' I don't really wanna go into it. It's too bo-boring for you people. But this is why I ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you there? Just makin' sure, buddy.<br />
<br>''[clattering]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Move out.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Another Troll''':</font> Well, how do I do that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi there, my kitty. ''[In baby voice]'' Yes, there's a pretty kitty.<br />
<br>''[Someone speaking with a voice-synth]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hang on a second. I've got, like, a thousand different... Oh, Crass, why'd you do that?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Because. You can unban him but, yeah. I'm not gonna friggin' stand for that. <br />
<br>''[Sound of a vacuum cleaner]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> I (m j d?) do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I heard the "g" word.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um, is that a vacuum cleaner?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Yeah, sounds like it is.<br />
<br>[Trolls speak but are drowned out by vacuum]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ...room or something.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I think the vacuum cleaner... <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If that's the government trying to do some kind of thing, then my name's Rusty Shackleford.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's a loud fan.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I have a fan above my stove, too.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Hey... I do, too.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Wait- wha- wait. You-you-you're in the kitchen? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Me too.<br />
<br>''[possibly Sonic game sound effects]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmhm? Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I'm pretty sure it's already asked, but I didn't catch the answer. When can we expect the next Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I-I-I told you my suggestion of releasing a page a day or something. I mean, it's a pretty good one. It-it-it allows for a good time. Finish a page a day. You upload it. You know? It's very good. Works very well.<br />
<br>''[Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh. I mean- you guys keep asking when he's going to finish it but I wonder how many pages are going to be in the new one? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> The last one was like, thirty. Just release it over the span of a month. Works fine. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...go up to ninety thousand...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[mutters something]''<br />
<br>''[Sound of Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Down by the river...side.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful voice, Chris.<br />
<br>''[clattering, typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[unclear, repeating the same two phrases]'' Gone down by the river, down by the water side, down by the riverside. Down by the waterside. Down by the riverside.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember ''[unclear]''<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -I'm hungry myself.<br />
<br>''[some kind of alarm sounding]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Then go eat.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I already ate.<br />
<br />
===Anime And Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I wonder what anime Chris watches nowadays. There's not many on television but do you still watch Japanese cartoons? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[In a bad accent]'' Kawaii desu ne. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I want to watch Shuffle. He said it was very good. He said it was sad. I don't know if I wanna watch- I don't like sad stuff. I like to be happy when I watch anime.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, and um, do you watch stuff like Bleach and um Code Geass or Naruto or something?<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I'm glad to hear that Shuffle isn't sad. I'm definitely going to watch it sometime.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um, yeah Chris that was a good call on Naruto. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah there's a lot of people who don't like it much either. Too popular.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But please. Please. Hope. ''[audio cuts out briefly]'' Uh, Chris, please consider When They Cry.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Ooh, I saw that one. It was a really good series.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, I know; that was good, like- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah. Both seasons of it. <br />
<br>''[Windows beeps, voices overlapping]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I could link you to Season One if you want. Yeah, Samantha got me into that. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...you'll give it a try, Chris. It's a very, very good series.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Hm. Hey, Julie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...lots of ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Watch Shuffle. You got the six episodes of Shuffle or... Which o- which anime? I'm sorry. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh and JoJo's Bizarre Adventure is also cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I really liked JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. Very ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Za warudo!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah, I think Shuffle is quite all right. I like Heidi. She's sweet and loyal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> That's a good one. One of my favorites is Black Lagoon.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris have you ever seen La Blue Girl?<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other about different anime]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, uh, Chris can I, my, uh, I don't know if it's all right, but, like, could you like, give me an email sometime? I could, uh... recommend you to... this anime that... Polly and... Julie like to watch. They're quite- they... Oh, C-and Cogs has recommended such great anime. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[talking to his mother]'' Yeah? That's ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> As well as Julie-Julie's the person that got me into anime.<br />
<br />
===People Love Poketunes===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> -we can go into this later cause I got my headphones on. And, Mom, you know what something else? They liked your singing.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> What? I don't sing.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> That's my laugh; that's my laugh. They couldn't hear me. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They heard you. Singin'. Just now.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I can't sing!<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I'm tone deaf. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They just heard you singing, and liked your voice.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay. Did you write checks for all those bills and pack everything ''[unclear]''?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yes, Mother, I did.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You're not telling me no story?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm not telling you no story.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> OK. It's important [''inaudible''] did you pay them?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, I paid that one. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay, you have to be honest with me, 'cause, see, you're settin'...<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm being honest, I'm being honest.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> How you respond to what [we] talk about. You say you ought to something and you don't do it then that's gonna change my ideas ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay... I'll be sure to pay the remaining differences next month.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> No, this month.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I know but I couldn't pay them all with 90 dollars so there's still some left ''[sound cuts]'' ...oh, you're cooking them up here, okay, that's why you turned the fan on over the stove.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br>''[Trolls rejoice and mock Momma Chandler]''<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 1|Mumble Chat 1]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 3|Mumble Chat 3]]|}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Spanish]]<br />
==Links==<br />
*[https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBOVVDS0JtSDNvMWs Download]<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_2&diff=163005Mumble 22012-09-26T21:03:42Z<p>Irisviel: /* Chris Types Fast (And Hates Hex-Box) */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{Articleofthenow}}<br />
[[Image:0839-MomDesi.JPG|thumb|right|180px|In Mumble 2, a Wild [[Barbara Chandler|Snorlax]] appeared.]]<br />
<br />
'''Mumble 2''' is the second [[Mumble]] chat that took place on 4 [[February 2009]]. More than an hour long.<br />
<br />
This is a more organized Q&A type chat than [[Mumble 1]]. Questions from [[Clyde]] about [[sex]] in the [[comic]] and interesting tidbits about how Chris believes sex is the same as romance. This is pretty hard hitting, with stuff like how Chris is into [[McDonald's|fast food]] yet he's against tobacco. A lot of drama involving Clyde.<br />
<br />
Length: '''1:49:17'''<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
<br />
===Notes===<br />
* Chris doesn't like Clyde because he stole his sweetheart.<br />
* Audio cuts out for a minute before Chris says: "...HYMEN!" (You broke her hymen)<br />
* Trolls claim [[Panda]] is with Clyde, Chris wants to hear her voice, they say she's busy<br />
* 'She and I WERE very close'<br />
* Chris didn't have $400-$800 to go and see Panda; claims he got this number from an airport website recommended by [[Miyamoto]]<br />
* Insists on [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] being in ''[[Animal Crossing]]''<br />
* Doesn't want to talk about his deal with them<br />
* Insists that he doesn't have to turn down his radio since his voice is louder (''it is horribly loud in the mic'')<br />
* Panda gave Clyde all of the sites, etc.<br />
* [[Sarah]] is going to be with Clyde, which Chris wants to deny<br />
* These motherfuckers keep talking over each other<br />
* Calls a troll's critique crap<br />
* [[Bubbles]] must be aroused, she isn't wet all the time<br />
* Bubbles is 90% water so does sperm just swim around forever? NO<br />
* Clyde: This is a children's comic, why so much sex?<br />
: '''Chris:''' It is romance. My best artwork is when they're making out 'romantic moments', drawn in protest to trolls. Shows that [[Rosechu]]s have vaginas, not [[duck]]s.<br />
* Admits to maybe going overboard<br />
* Trolls try to reason with him about the [[ED]] article: There wouldn't be an article if he didn't react like he does.<br />
* Trolls say that TV-Y7 means NO SEX but Chris points to romantic anime that have making out (cartoons are for kids, whatever the content).<br />
* Trolls talk about Japan being less strict about those things<br />
* Everyone gets to vote in [[CWCville]], even if they're [[Niggos|black]].<br />
* Got his idea from [[Mary Poppins]].<br />
* Troll tries to give historical background about cough medicine putting kids to sleep. Chris insists it was the lullaby that put them to sleep.<br />
* Discussion about Chris, 'gay message' sent by a troll<br />
* He calls Clyde a scoundrel<br />
* BELIEVE HIM HE IS STRAIGHT<br />
* Chris tries to speak Mexican at 20:50<br />
* Mexican speaks Mexican to him... he replies in Menglish<br />
* [[4-cent_garbage]] is located in Mexico<br />
* Someone says that he needs to improve his Mexican<br />
* Chris is against smoking, CWCville is smoke and alcohol free<br />
* Rehash of why [[tobacky]] is bad, his position on it, alcohol=bar fights<br />
* Chris's dad smoked and had several bypasses, has a pacemaker and has had heart attacks<br />
* Mention of his hair cuttings for his fans<br />
* Chris was doing math in his head, got in car crash.<br />
* Chris has taken college level math. Took trigonometry.<br />
* Trolls gang up on Clyde for stealing Panda<br />
* Time will tell when Chris will make the money he would have in the Nintendo deal<br />
* Trolls bash Clyde for his pot smoking <br />
* Chris doesn't watch news because it's bad news =(<br />
* Bashing of the Mexican<br />
* Chris can type 30 to 100 WPM, but can't type and talk at the same time<br />
* Chris says [[PSN]] is free though Clyde(?) points to the $1,000 Chris spent on PSN<br />
* Chris has been typing for 15 minutes now and it is VERY loud<br />
* Chris has been busy IRL therefore the comic release doesn't have a date<br />
* Someone points to nudes on [[YouTube]].<br />
* He does not have it on the YouTube, but he isn't going to take it anymore.<br />
* Claims some of the photos are photoshopped.<br />
* Clyde offers help to take ED page down.<br />
* Chris denies taking those pictures, doesn't want to talk about it, making him uncomfortable.<br />
* Some of the pictures are real. When questioned which ones are fake, Chris can't answer.<br />
* Chris hates Harry Potter because it was in competition with [[Pokémon]]!<br />
* Chris is too stressed to read Vivian's [[A Girl Who Brought Down the World|book]], but he likes the cover!<br />
* Polly, who has been talking the whole time is confronted by Chris who thinks she is a guy. Polly is upset. Chris apologizes.<br />
* [[Jimmy Hill]] has launched his Sonichu show<br />
* More Mexican talk at 55:10<br />
* Chris giggles and sighs happily when Cassie, another Mexican, compliments him and when she leaves he says 'Chiquita Bonita'<br />
* Rabbichoso talk (Sonichu.info)<br />
* Classic trolls are leaving Chris alone.<br />
* Chris likes Steel Angel Kurumi (''quote from [[Wikipedia:Steel Angel Kurumi|Wikipedia]]: often classified as ecchi due to the focus on fanservice and panty shots'')<br />
* Chris claims to be very strong, could beat Clyde up. Says he would show Clyde a [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force|Hard Day's Night]], and would give Clyde pain.<br />
* ShinyMarshtomp makes an appearance? Likes Rabbichoso<br />
* Chris likes to eat at [[Country Cookin]] (''like Golden Corral'')<br />
* Chris likes to imagine his first time. <br />
* Clyde says the first time is awful, Chris said it was because Clyde prematurely ejaculated<br />
* Watch porn with naked women to cure your gay<br />
* Guys sitting next to you = gay coming on to you<br />
* Falsion has been in the chat room and is afraid he is gay<br />
* A wild Snorlax appears<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
<br />
===Waiting for Chris===<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I can't wait to hear Chris! I'm a huge fan!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, goddamn these noodles are fantastic. Man, I wish I could eat like this everyday.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Have you eaten the rice balls?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no. These are noodles. These are-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Fan-fucking-tastic.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now they're all gone, it's fantastic, you know?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Sweetangie is Chris. Or, we think so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's definitely not the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm disappointed there's so many impostors out there. Kinda my fault, but, you know, if it weren't- ''[unintelligible]'' -hard to come by.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His mic was working last time he was here, just fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He usually capitalizes his words, like in every sentence.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is- I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Is it set to push to talk or something?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You better get us your email address Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah its push to talk. It's called push to talk. It's fantastic ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, just have him set it to voice activity. It works so much better that way.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Aww, he left.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> You guys are fucking idiots.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other again]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You guys scared him off by being guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, you fucking jackasses. Nice going.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Was that even the real...?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yes, that was the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He's too much of a pussy to talk.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, cause you scared him, or some- No, or he's too stupid to be.<br />
<br>''[Trolls Laugh]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Arrives===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Chris arrives, with radio playing loudly]'' Hello.<br />
<br>''[Trolls all greet him]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, now-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Why haven't you got your microphone working?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't know why my microphone [is] messed up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry, but we had an impostor here before.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm registered. I've got myself registered now. So, uh, hopefully-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> That's probably why. It had to like, uh- calibrate.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Well, I'm calibrated now.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So, Chris, have you seen Rabbichoso, it's fantastic.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't give a crap about your stupid pencil sketch.<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am not listening. I do not have to listen to ''you''.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Why, I'm not understanding [inaudible]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well for one thing,and I'll say it on here, you stole my sweetheart!<br />
<br>''[Cutout continues]''<br />
<br />
===PandaHalo, Trip to Redmond and Animal Crossing===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You broke her hymen!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I know it's a terrible mistake, but I plan to make it up to her. I'm getting married and uh- I'm doing the things I should do.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh and another thing, if she is really over there with you now, then put her on the mic. Please.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> She's not- He never said-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, Chris, she's very busy, OK. She's very busy.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's not over here right now. Okay? So lets drop it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, fine. Well could you tell her to please send me a message lettin' me know, for sure, so I can know- so I can know to-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' I'll let her know whatever you want, but it's her life. She doesn't have to send you a message. You failed her. You failed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' She and I were very close.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If you we're so close, then why didn't you go?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' Because I had- Aw, hang on a second. How do I- oh, that's right. This thing. Right. Mmm. Hold on a sec. Oh yeah, because I did not have four to eight hundred dollars!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It doesn't cost that much to go cross-country man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes it does. I know, I saw it on an airport website. Where I was be- Where I was- recommended to me by Mr. Miyamoto.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, you can drive there. It's not that hard.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened with that? I thought, um, didn't you have a deal with them or something? I heard a rumor that your characters were going to be in Animal Crossing.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, they are in Animal Crossing. And I did- and I do- I did have a deal with them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened though?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' I'd rather not say.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Radio, Clyde and Criticism===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, why don't you turn down the TV? It's hard to hear you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Annoyed sigh]'' I do not have a TV turned on in here.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I can hear it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have a radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I hear something in the background.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Burping throughout sentence]'' Well that's the- that would b- the radio. And it is not that loud.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But it shows up pretty well on your microphone mic. With due respect.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But still, my voice is louder than the radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Ah goo- ahh given.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh, Chris? Uh, when are you going to do the new Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something over Polly]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' Uh, I'll answer Polly's question. I'm not sure. It's, uh, it's in progress right now, I'm drawing it up.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I can't wait to read it!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Well, we'll see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Listen, Clyde kind of has admin on here, so we can't really do anything about him. So, yeah. I don't know.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Hard to hear over Chris's radio]'' ...with you guys. I love you guys. Just as much as Chris loves you guys. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I was angry. I was angry. But I'm calm now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't try to hurt any other person from now on.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm doing the best I can. I'm doing the best I can.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have much- I do not have much to say in response to that right now. Because I'm ticked off.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't let him get to you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're no better than he is, if you give in.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris, I just wanted to let you know I'm a huge fan of the comics, and I'm glad you keep doing what you're doing. You're doing a great job, and just keep it up, alright man?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, yeah, I appreciate the, uh, what's the word I'm looking for? The, the, uh- well, the encouraging words. Encouragement. I appreciate the encouragement. Well, there are things, uh- I- er- current events I do not appreciate. I appreciate the positive encouragement.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I can't really do anything. He took over the IRC channel. I used to be the owner. I mean Clyde. He's like taking over everything.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, it was because Panda gave it to me, you know. But anyway, I mean, you can't just listen to encouragement, you've got to listen to criticism, man. Criticisms are what make you better, you learn from your mistakes. You learn from mistakes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Be right back guys, my wife is calling.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I don't- I don't- Tons of people don't like the Rabbichoso art style, but you know, I gotta improve on that. That's something I plan to improve on. There's a lot of criticism in the death of Sonichu, right? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What? What did you just say?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a lot of criticism of Sonichu. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. For a moment there I thought you said something different.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What, what did you think I said? I'm just saying, there are people who like it and people who don't like it. You gotta start taking in those suggestions. You know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. So many things that will be improved upon. But, I just have to hear from Sarah herself that she really is going to be with you, Clyde. I have to hear it from herself. It's one thing to hear it from you and then it's- then on that note, it's just I find it very hard to believe. So I have to hear it from her.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I kinda think that Rabbichoso sucks. I mean, I think it could be funny, but it honestly looks like it's drawn by a kindergartner.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, Sonichu has evolved over the years. You can see that the art's getting better. Rabbichoso doesn't even look like something a beginner would do, honestly. I mean, ''[Interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A whole bunch of crap!<br />
<br>''[Everyone starts talking at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, Sonichu is in color.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I know, I accept his criticism. But you just called it crap! Now that's just rude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have emotions going behind me- uh, behind that opinion.<br />
<br />
===Cassie===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, did you get my message.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Aren't you going to be the gentleman, then? Aren't you gonna be the gentleman?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I just want to ask you, Chris. I'm Cassie's friend. She- she's worried sick about you. Why haven't you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did email her! As a- I- I haven't gotten any re-plies from her. I have emailed her and I have instant messaged her on A.I.M. and Skype. I haven't heard back from her. I don't know what's going on there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> ...you emailed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> When was the last time you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, hang on, I'll check.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris? I have a question. My fa- One of my favorite new characters is, um, Simonla, and like, I also like Zapina as well. Um, are they gonna have bigger parts in the series later on?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, could you repeat that question?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I was wondering if Simonla and Zapina will either have bigger parts in the series later on. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [[Sonichu_10#The_Final_Countdown|Possibly]]. Possibly, but, uh, I can't say for sure. Oh, and, uh, to answer your question, uh- in answer to, uh, I believe, uh, Screwhead, who asked? It was about four days ago. About four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Yeah. Four days ago? Okay, I'll tell her to check it out.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> The last email I sent was about four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> She'll contact you in a while, though.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I'll tell her to check it out and- and thanks Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright. Mm.<br />
<br />
===Bubbles's Pussy and Sex in the Comics===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris? I have a question.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, my favorite character is Bubbles, I kinda liked the, uh, the thing she had going with Blake, where she was kind of keeping the relationship secret. I thought that was kinda clever. I was wondering, uh, she's a water-type, so does that mean that her vagina is always wet, or does she have to be aroused like a normal woman?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, aroused. That's applied for all the, uh, Rosechus there. And also, like, you know, she's not just a water-type, she's also- she's a water- and electric-type, like uh- oh, shoot- What's the name of that one? Originated from Gold-Silver-Crystal series, uh, evolves from Chinchou? Lanturn. And she has, uh, she has Volt Absorb ability.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, Chris, another question following Bubbles. Uh, her body is 90% water, and now this thing about the whole sexual intercourse- about it. Now, don't take this rude, and you don't need to answer me... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...I totally respect your creative work. My wife actually got me into this, uh, show actually. So, what happens is- like, as you know, like, semens are like little fishes in themselves. Would that mean, I mean, would they actually have a route to fly into the egg, in theory, or do they just swim around her whole body, just forever just swimming around.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. The, uh, the internal or- the internal organs uh, for the Rosechus are pretty much the same thing, so I'd say pre- about, uh, as good chance as most any other mammal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, so you mean she's able to control her density a little bit more. She- I understand now. She's able to control more her density from the 90% water. Okay. That pretty much answers it just perfectly. That's been bothering me at work. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I got another question, Chris, about this whole sexual thing. I mean, this is a children's comic, right? Why is there so much sex in it?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. It's called romance, and my- and my- if you'll notice throughout the comics my best pieces of artwork among which were those where dey were kissing and making out. Romantic moments.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a hidden page-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' And because- and because- and because of the tension from, uh, the trolls and Encyclopedia Dramatica, I just felt like doing that in protest against them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, but childre-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' Yes but how is that really a protest? That, you know, you know, are, are you like referencing to the 60's when women burned their bras? That was in protes- That was feminism. Saying that they weren't slaves to men. Do you even understand the whole thing?<br />
<br>''[Multiple voices are heard at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Now, to tell you the truth, I never really thought about, I never really thought about that when I-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Chris]'' Then how is, stripping was, how was that protest-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Jack]'' It shows that they have vaginas and NOT dicks. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well you know the dick thing was the fact that they were just, you know, mocking you. I think you went overboard with that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well maybe I did. Maybe I did. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, you did, because that seems kind of excessive, kind of-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' I don't think they would have even bothered to write about an article about you if you didn't just keep reacting like that.<br />
<br />
===Chris justifies sex in a kids' comic===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I have another question.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The point some of us are trying to make is, if it's TV-Y7 that means there should really be no sex in it at all.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible over other people]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's pretty much incorrect, I mean, uh, there's so many romantic anime that's TV-Y7, and they shoul- they have making out.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, a lot of things in Japan, Japan has stricter standards-not stricter, I mean looser guidelines than America. It's much different.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear ya.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I was just wondering what Bubbles, um, she has a, that water whirlwind attack, I was just curious if you had any plans to make- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Butting in]'' By the way, that was a Whirl- Whirlpool.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font>Yeah, Whirlpool, sorry, sorry, Whirlpool, but do you have any plans to mix an, uh, Electric-type attack with that, since water conducts electricity, right? It could be a very powerful-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah, she did, she did an electric attack amongst the- the walls of that Whirlpool and she let out. In case you didn't know, there's a- little bits of lightning bolts among which-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, oh, I'm sor- I didn't notice that, I'm sorry, I'll go take another look. Thank you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hey Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> You make some pretty sweet Little Big Planet levels.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you.<br />
<br />
===Chris on Benadryl babysitting===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, there's a message from Cogs on the side, it's about, uh, do women not have the right to vote already in CWCville.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, evry- Everybody, no matter what age, no matter what gender or race, everybody has the right to vote in CWCville. Even if they're black.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Then what's up with the "Votes for Women" thing, I was-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Not just vote women, but- ''[interrupted]'' any other ethnicities, and gays?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't understand-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did that- heard it in Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What? Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, man, Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, yeah, that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's a classic. It's my favorite movie of all time.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that movie was, like, based in the 1900s.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but still I- still I agreed with that message there-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Taken out of context, that makes it seem like CWCville's set in the 1960s.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What message? That children should be given cough medicine so they'll go to sleep?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''What?''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that's what women used to do back in- That's what mothers, friggin' nurses and stuff used to do to kids in the 1900s, is give children, like, you know, cough medicine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Cause- cause the medicine- uh, correction, the medicine did not put them to sleep, there was a lullaby, not the cough medicine. They only had to take the cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ...because it rained, before dere, and it was not, and it was to, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Rain means cough medicine doesn't have anything to do with each other. That's not how friggin' germs are spread, or colds are gotten. Colds are gotten through germs, not the rain.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How is cough medicine any different from today's parents that just let their kids watch TV until they fall asleep? I mean, it's just as bad.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well- Cough medicine has a lot to do with the psychological effects of it. Obviously if you get- if you keep giving fre-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Thanks, Samantha, that was delicious.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's my, uh, Samantha-<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, that's we're all saying, cause I've heard that there's a lot of different chemicals in cough medicine. You could pick up a ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I don't even take cough medicine, because I'm not a pussy.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Anyway, I never put any references, I never did any references or plan any references to cough medicine or anything of that sort.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Well, Chris, Cassie says the last e-mail she got from you was on the 17th. How 'bout your being gay? Is that true?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[sigh]'' That wa- That was somebody had- That was Clyde hacking through my e-mail and spammed that to my contacts.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, I definitely did not do that-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You're a scoundrel-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -a slanderous lie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I did not do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Whoa-whoa-whoa. Wow. Well, thanks for that. She was worried that you were- that you don't like her.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> You're a scoundrel, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't do that. That was someone else.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I was wondering, because I've heard other news too, I was really hoping that you weren't gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Believe me, I'm straight.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I'll take your word for it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you. And, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Cogs- Cogs got a way- she showed us that, okay? I mean, you only ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br />
===Chris's fail-riffic Spanish===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So, Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, Screwhead's from Mexico. I heard you like Spanish, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hola, Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You know Spanish, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí. Conoso Mexico. Tomé dos años ''[unclear]'' mi escuela secundaria. (Yes, I know Mexico. I took two years [in, possibly] my secondary school.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has venido en Mexico? (Have you come to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, lo siento? (Uh, I'm sorry?)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has estado en Mexico? (Have you been to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Estoy Mexico? No. (I am Mexico? No.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[slowly]'' Has estado, um, in Mexico. Has venir? (Have you been to Mexico? Have gone?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Uh, no, I hav- no, no tengo pansars. ''[sic]'' (no, I don't have pansars (?))<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I think, uh, I think I meant to say- I'm pretty sure-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Did you just say you don't wear pants?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, no, I was trying to say, ah, I don't have plans to go in Mexico at the moment.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's what I understood what he was saying there.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, did you know that, that 4-cent garbage website is located in Mexico?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> That's why-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, that's why they can't get it shut down.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]'' borders, plus it's cheaper to run sites over there; they have, like, several servers.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wanted to talk to you, but she couldn't make it here, well, and, she wants to be your Spanish teacher, because she says that you've got room to improve your Spanish.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Oh, that Cassie. Yeah, I'm sorry, I thought you were- I got mixed up. Um... Yeah, um, I'm sorry, I, uh, I haven't talked to that- I haven't talked to Cassie in a while, but I've been mostly talking to, uh, her gal- her, uh, gal-pal and I'm sure- I'm sure she'd tell you a lot about her...<br />
<br />
===In which the trolls discuss bar fights===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey Chris, how- how does Sonichu keep Rosechu from spending more than a hundred dollars at the mall? I've always wondered how he could manage to do that. I've always had problems with that myself.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That wa- That time at the mall, it was, uh, Kel loaned the credit card. And it's like, yeah- she gave- she gave Sonichu the responsibility of that credit card. She did.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I've always given my advice on cannabis, you should do the ''[unintelligible]'', Cogs Chris, but I think she wants your response.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, one of my friends sent me this picture, and I think you might find it kinda disturbing just because they say it's proof that you're gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Aw yeah, I saw that, that's just a crappy Photoshop.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No, that one doesn't- this one doesn't look Photoshopped at all.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'm not gonna look at it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Oh, you're not? Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, uh, you say you're against smoking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. As a matter of fact, CWCville is a smoke-free, non-alcoholic city.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[partially drowned out]'' That's what we call a totalitarian state...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, and, uh, in the pilot episode with Seth MacFarlane, of, you know, Family Guy? He's always smoking. What do you think about that?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Go smoke.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I just- I just take that with a grain of salt, and, uh, you know, that's what-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, if he can smoke, why can't anyone else? I mean, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Because it causes cancer!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> So does a lot of things.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> It could be a prop pipe.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> In any case, I'm not- in any, in any case I've never done it and I never will.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, but eating too much fast food can give you a heart attack. I mean... so many things are deadly for you.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What about fast food, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> My father used to smoke and he went through a whole bunch of heart attacks. He suffered three- <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Well, I think that might have to do more with his weight.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He suffered through three or four triple bypasses.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I think that's... that's more like a weight issue.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He has a pacemaker!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, eh...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey ya guys, leave him alone. Ya know, my granddad, he smoked most of his life. He quit for 25 years and still died of lung cancer. I mean that's just the way it is. And your body never gets rid of it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, what about ''[pause]'' Chris, what about fast food? That's- that's bad for you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey Chris. Chris, could you do me a favor and send an email to Cassie? She's very worried about you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Yeah sure, I'll send her an email later.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, thanks.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, I've got uh, a certain someone you know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No no.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -she has to, uh, she wants to ask you w- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Also, she said something about some hair.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh yeah. Yeah, that's uh... that's another issue right there. Um, hmmm. I'll talk to her about that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, does, uh, drinking cause cancer?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, but it causes liver dysfunction and likely bar fights and automobile accidents.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, bar fights, but— <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Bar fights!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> -but I don't think that bar fights are that big of a problem.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I think bar fights are awesome.<br />
<br>''[People agree bar fights are awesome]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> But bar fights are bad. I got into a bar fight once and one of my hands got cut and two fingers from my left hand. Bar fights suck.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well, I think that might be more because you're Mexican. Are you sure you didn't lose them picking bo- picking grapes and- or something?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> No, Mexican people are more more- more much macho man; we get into bigger fights. We're more awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No- I think it might be because you got your hands stuck in some machinery when you were out picking in the vineyards.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't know about you guys, but I like- I like having bar fights.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Crashes Due To Math===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't have to be drunk to be in a bar fight or in an automobile accident, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but they increase the likeliness of it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You've been in an autobile— automobile accident, I mean, were you drunk?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I was distracted.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Uh, by what? I mean, it's kinda hard to be dist— you gotta be focused on driving man-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I was doing math in my head.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, math in your— <br />
<br>[Trolls talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> My mind got distracted by being its own calculator.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Are you good at math?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, is that for school?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Are you some kind of savant?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's impossible.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Guys, you're getting ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you like a mathematic genius or something?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> You know some artist people have like superpowers in their head. They can do like geniuses and add really well. ''[interrupted briefly by Jack saying something else about savant]'' Chris you are already an artist. Do you have any like, magical powers?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, I heard autistic people are really good at math. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Well not all the stereo- some of that sounds like stereotypes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[talking over Chris]'' ...it has to do with mental ability; I mean, what's the...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean I don't know- I mean I'm not saying that I'm a total genius. I mean I know- I know enough to get by.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What's the highest level of math you've taken Chris?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> College level.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I mean like algebra, or calculus or...?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. I believe I just did trigonometry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Very impressive.<br />
<br>[long pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So I was wondering. When did you get the CAD degree? I figured it's like a fine arts degree or something? I mean wha-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I designed a whole- I designed buildings and machinery and such along there. I designed the whole CWCVille shopping center.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don't you have a job then?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Your fans would love to see that Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' -I mean use that to design like, actual buildings? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I think I just told you I designed the CWCVille sho-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I don't mean in your comic. I'm just saying-<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde Isn't Popular And Chris Should Program===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well it's a good st-<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I heard you got some nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'll be putting an update on da YouTube soon, but not right now. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking maybe you could like, you know, get a degree in game design and make the Sonichu game? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah man, it's not that hard to learn programming. C++ man.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">''Falsion:'''</font> Clyde, he hates you, why are you talking?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm just giving him some advice, I mean C++ is-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you here? We don't like you. You totally ruined Chris's life.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't ruin his life. He ruined his own life.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yes you did. You've ruined his life. You raped his girlfriend. <br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks at once over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If he was the man he said he was, he'd have gone to Nintendo, made all that money. How- how are you going to make money now Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Time will tell.<br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks again]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, time will tell Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font>''[unclear]'' -need a plan, you know? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking uh, if- uh- would you be interested in getting a degree in game design. Making the game or something? Like if you had to? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Maybe but uh- I still have things to sort out in my real life.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah it's kinda unfortunate what happened with the Nintendo thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah- hang on a second, I'll be right back. Mm- ''[clattering]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So be honest guys am I really that much of a bother. I mean...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah you kind of are.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like a total dickfart.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You realize weed causes cancer? <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I didn't know that. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> And it causes the munchies. You're gonna get fat, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's okay, man, because I work out.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Do you play Guitar Hero standing up?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I play Guitar Hero while on the treadmill. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Will the Sonichu game be a- ''[muffled]'' -or a Wii one?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> It be a Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Wii would like to play. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh. I only got a DS. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I heard you are very good at HTML. Why don't you make a HTML Sonichu game? That would be awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't think you can make a game in HTML.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A- anyway I came back...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hey, Chris? How many courses did you have to take to get that degree in CAD? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -pretty sure you can make a game in HTML-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[speaking over]'' I'm took abo- took about two- took about two years to four years. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, if you can write HTML you can write C++, make your own games. Pretty simple man. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well it's something I'll consider. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde why are you talking to him? He hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm trying to give him some suggestions. I'm not insulting him, OK? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> HTML seems kinda outdated, so to speak. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font>I learn- I took two HTML classes so at least I know how to do- at least I know the ins and outs when it comes to like, workin' on it in the raw data- in the notepad.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> So you don't use Dreamweaver?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I also use Net- also use Netscape composer. <br />
<br>''[Someone starts singing 'Dreamweaver']''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I heard they went bankrupt or something.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't- I don- I don't listen to news because I don't care about bad news. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But that's not bad news that's just safety...<br />
<br>''[Talking over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why you gotta bring this bad vibe in here? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> OK OK I'll chill, I'm sorry it's just my wife- ''[can't hear over Chris typing extremely loud]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris you don't hear about these ones in a while. Like yesterday some guy in my town got run over by a train and he- he died. And that's a really bad thing, you know but you have to hear about it. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yeah but that's because you're Mexican. You Mexicans always play around the train tracks, what's with you? <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No come on, don't be racist.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> It's because Mexicans are stupid. I'm surprised I can use a computer. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' CrassCrab why do you have to be so mean?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> 'Cause my mother was raped by a Mexican. And I'm part Me- ''[muffled]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry man.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> That isn't fair to take it out on every other Mexican out there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His rule applied to millions. Just ignore him.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No I'm not my mother was raped by Mexicans.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> CrassCrab I'm tired of listening to you, get out of here. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Not all Mexicans are like that we- we- I am a nice Mexican guy. Not all Mexican guys are- ''[drowned out by typing]'' -Black guys are the people you should fear.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't get me started on them. But that will be another day. Cause I'm sick of hearing bad news.<br />
<br />
===Chris Types Fast (And Hates Hex-Box)===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris what are you uh- typing there?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm typing a email. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> How many words can you type? How fast can you type? Sounding fast there. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhh say about uh- sorta between thirty and a hundred. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's quite a good range man. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like "The Flash", minus the red jump-suit.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh Chris um- I was wondering if- ''[unclear]'' -game with Nintendo, would it be uh a Wii game or a DS game or both. I only own DS and I don't have any money for a Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[overlapping]'' Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wii, DS and Pla- hopefully uh- possibly uh, PlayStation 2 or 3. Never on [[Hex_Box|Hex-Box]]. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> When you gonna do this shit?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Why don't you like the Hex-Box? I mean I have an Xbox, I would love to play online with you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'd like to say this. Before Chris says anything about that I just wanna say that today my wife came home from the mall shopping for her usual clothes, that Gucci purse I had to buy for her. You know what she came home with? I wanted a PS3 but you know what she gave me was a frickin' Xbox 360. The Elite one? ''[someone speaks over]'' I know, I kept telling her like "Honey this isn't what I wanted. I wanted the PlayStation 3 so I can play LittleBigPlanet, Metal Gear Solid and Sonic Unleashed" <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You can put Sonic Unleashed on the Hex Box as well as Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Too whiny to make out]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Nintendo just- rejected your offer? Cause I- I heard a rumor that there was going to be a Sonichu game or something. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris uh. Cassie wants you to send her your Wii number so she can talk to you on the Wii. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright uhhhhh. I'll get- have to get my Wii number now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Send it to her in an email please.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they completely hate Sony. And they hate Microsoft as well. I mean this guy, Reggie? He always talks about kicking their ass and stuff. He's kinda crazy. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I know. Reggie's very mean he never brought out Mother 3 to America. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah I wanted to play that game.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talked over]'' -I'm tellin' you guys. Reggie's just a great ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Like what?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can- I can't say anything OK but... you'll see. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah so I don't think like if you got the deal with Nintendo I don't think they'd put it on like mu- like anything else but the Wii or DS. Yeah, cause that Reggie guy he frickin' hates Sony. And Microsoft. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wasn't he also the head of VH1?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or Pizza Hut.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. What are your favorite places to eat at? <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember um Peter Moore he used to - ''[unclear]'' -but before that he was with Sega when Dreamcast was out. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yup. Let me type this email please. I mean y'all keep talking I'll just listen. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's no reason to hate the Xbox. To be honest.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or um- Chris um- do you wanna release your game on Nintendo and on Sony. If you do talk to somebody like EA or something, you can like do um- multi-console thing like a third party thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[busy typing]'' Hmm. Well it's all to think about. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I mean Sega does third party now so um- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah well I'm gonna keep typing this email here. Y'all keep talking. <br />
<br>''[Sound of Chris typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's true, it's true. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Chris I wanted to tell you that Cassie's going to be here any- any second so you can talk to her. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Hm. ''[continues typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Don't you care about her? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[annoyed]'' I'm typin' da email to her right now! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah um 360 is pretty bad it um- red-rings all the time. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> I've had mine over two years. The same one. And it has not red-ringed yet. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Dude you have to pay $50 just so you can play online. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[echoing]'' Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah it's bullshit.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah it's totally free on PlayStation. And Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris. Chris. No, no, no, no, I gotta talk about this. [long pause] Chris...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupting]'' I get less connection problems myself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can't let you get away with this Chris. You spent over $1000 on the PlayStation Network. OK? And you say you can't afford $50 for the Xbox? Terrible reason. That's a terrible reason. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, um, Cogs I had a friend of mine whose red-ringed a lot of times. She did not like it at all. She got herself a PS3 instead. <br />
<br>''[Chris is STILL typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I heard that like- the PS triple eats up a lot of energy and like- has cau- has like- burned houses down. Cause it messes up the- no but the PS3 really- <br />
<br>''[More of Chris typing then audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So when's the next comic coming out Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I can't say. I don't have a date for it right now. I've been busy with the- with real life and such. You know getting the s- getting the website back up and all that. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh but I've been waiting so long. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I gotta tell you something Chris. ''[unclear]'' -to the trolls but I haven't done anythin' myself. It's run off into splinter groups doin' stuff to you. Ever since the Panda thing, I haven't done anything to you man. Everybody's been running round doing things. I have no control anymore. So I'm back here. This is why I'm back here. Do you understand? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. I hear you.<br />
<br />
===Nudes On YouTube===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I hear you got some uh- nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> What? <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hear you got some nudes on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> NUDES!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> That's what I thought- I have nothing na- I have nothing like that on the nu- on the YouTube. I've nothing like that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh someone posted the pics form the ED page. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> They're just tryin' ta get on- they're just tryin' ta get on my nerves again. But I'm not gonna let 'em.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Did you take those pictures or what? Where'd they come from?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Uh, are they Photoshopped?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah most of- Yes. Most of them are Photoshopped.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I can help you with ED. Chris I can help you with ED.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You can see the neck and the body doesn't quite match up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, Chris. Cassie's just arrived. She's a little nervous about talking to you, but she's gonna talk to you soon. Is that OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I just got one quick comment. The ED people were in contact with me, but I've lost contact with them. But I know you can delete that page permanently. I'm tryin' to help you man. You can get that page down forever. Even the entire site. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What, after you raped uhm- Sarah? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I'm trying to make amends. So let me do my business. All right?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's too late to make amends. Look what you did. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um. Cogsdev said she had a look at the data, they have it up in Image editing software.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah. Well...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I don't know what to tell you there. <br />
<br>''[Several trolls speak at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Doesn't that mean they're real? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I don't think so. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You don't think so?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Well, did you take them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Then where did those pictures come from? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who took those?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I don't know. And I'd rather not talk about that anymore. It's making me feel uncomfortable.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Are you lying to your fans Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> We don't feel confort- we don't feel comfortable. We're big fans of your work and we don't like being lied to. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I'd like to make a point. It might just be a doppelganger [sic].<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, you know the thing I hate most is lies. I like to spread the truth about you Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You say you're honest, but you're lying to us.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[clearly annoyed]'' Fine, fine. Some those pictures are real. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Some of them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Some of them but not all of them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Like, which ones aren't real?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'd rather not go into detail because I'd rather not look at 'em. Cause uh- ''[interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' -are you ashamed of it?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Do you not like to look in the mirror?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You owe it- you owe it to your fans.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, but- yeah, but- yeah, but upon looking at those it's like ref- it's like reflecting a pe- uh p- a past moment in my life where I- I was played for the fool. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah, by the man in the pickle suit?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh that guy- I hate that guy.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah I saw- he was trolling some other people you know? So you're not alone, Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he took pictures of me like that too...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That guy's an asshole, I hate him.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhhh yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He took pictures of my wife too. Sick bastard. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[I think she says he is a peanut]''<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br>[another pause]<br />
<br />
===Chris Hates Harry===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I just uh- never was fond of it. Ever since it came out, I was never fond of it. ''[unclear as troll speaks over]'' -just like I hate Harry Potter because he's s- he's goin- he's uh- in compe- was in competition against the world of Pokemon. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Well that- that doesn't make sense. But they're two different medias. Pokemon-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah but- yeah but still he-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> -Harry Potter is a book.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah but he poses as competition against them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> That's not really competition. I mean- <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talks over Jack]'' Oh that reminds me about books- Vivi- Vivian wrote a book and sent it to you. You never read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes. I am afraid I- yeah, yeah- I'm uh- I've been uh- so I've been under uh- too much stress between internet and all that. I'll ge- I'll read it, I'll read it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's been waiting for your response for quite a long time.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I like the cover. (pause) Nice cover.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he is right about that. That is a nice cover. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah the book is pretty good- I read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Well I- I will definitely make it a point to uh- read it. Very soon. <br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Audible over the others]'' Did you ever read Twilight?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I've heard th- I've heard Twilight and I've seen the trailer but I haven't seen the movie, I'll wait for it to come out DVD or Blu-ray.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br />
===Random Access Humor Python Style===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh OK, I heard a lot of girls like Twilight. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I see. Hey Polly does your voice sound like that, 'cause it sounds like [[BlueSpike|a guy talking falsetto]]. I mean no personal offense. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> That's not very nice...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm sorry. Believe me I didn't mean any pe- anything personal it's just like, you know- hm- kind- just kinda takes me by surprise a bit, that's all.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I knew a girl like that in high school.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Sounding upset]'' I can't help it if I'm born like this.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I'm- I'm- I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah she's a girl. I saw her pics. She's a girl.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I'll s- I'll take his word for it. I'm sorry I cu- I accused you there.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um. OK. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You know, aut- I mean- let's- it's just uh- you know it's uh- you know it's uh a bit- just a spot of fun. [[Random-access_humor|Stupid humor]]. Monty Python's Flying Circus. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> We know you love that. There's just so many references to it in the comic. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah I d- after they put all of the entire series on PlayStation Network I downloaded the Hamlet episode- that was the one that had uh- Jimmy Hill parodying himself. It also had this funny bit where it was like, you know- ''[in a stupid voice]'' "...and now it's time for The Robinsons, an everyday story about blah-de-blah-de-blah-de-blah. Dum-de-dum-de-dum-de-duhhh-dum-de-dum"- and so on...<br />
<br>''[A troll begins to speak but is interrupted by a very high-pitched Chris]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> "Morning Mrs. Robinson- Morning Mrs. Robinson. Comin' out shoppin'? Oh- you've been shoppin', what did you buy? What's this?-" 'What did you buy this for?'[Trolls laugh over him]'' -It was a bargain!"<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I've heard you do that before. I don't know where. Anyway uh- uhm- Whatever happened to Jimmy Hill? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I haven't heard from him in a long time so just assuming uh- he gave up or uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I think he got a- I think he got a, uh- children's TV program in England.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well he ain't botherin' me, so I'm not worried about him anymore.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Ye- but he's stealing Sonichu. Bastardizing it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah he did but uh- he s- but haven't seen any updates on his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' -profile, he's still doing it.<br />
<br>''[Several trolls talk over each other about him having a TV show]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Fails At Spanish Pt. 2===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' <br />
<br>''[Troll says something more about the TV show, but it's muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wants to say hi. Just forgive her English because she can't speak very well, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> All right. Just sent her the email by the way, just now. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Hey, Chris. It's me, Cassie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi, Cassie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Fine, and you?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm feelin' OK. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Why haven't you emailed me? I was really about-was really worried about you. What's happened? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry. I be- I've bee- I've been busy with the Internet and the stress and all that. I sent ya an email just now go- it's got my Wii number in it so you can add me to your contacts. I've been talking to uh- I've been talking to Sarah lot- quite a bit lately. She's been helping me with uh- updating the Sonichu site, since I've uh- since I'm working on uh- it's re-uploading and such. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Kay, I believe you. I going to check ''[pronounced like 'sheg']'' it, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You're going to where?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[very quietly]'' Check it.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> To check it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> To "shag-it"? Is that the-<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Check the email. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[still doesn't understand]'' Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> I going to check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, check email. ''[Laughs]'' Yeah I'm sorry I tr- I tried to uh- understand but it just kind of messed up a little bit. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don- why don't you two speak in Spanish?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhh. I'm not exactly fluent. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ¿Sabes hablar español, Chris? (Do you know how to speak Spanish?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí, hablo español. (Yes, I speak Spanish)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Oh. ''[pause, one of the trolls says something to her]'' Oh, eso es muy sexy. (That is very sexy.)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Ohhhh. Te gusta. Te gusta muchísimo, (You like it. You like it a lot)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> La verdad, si. (To tell you the truth, yes)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Me amos mis amigas muchísimas. Sons muy bueñas! (I love my friends (feminine) a lot. They are very good.) [Correction: Amo a mis amigas muchísimo. Son muy buenas.] <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Oh, eso es tan cool en español! Muy bueno! (That's so cool in Spanish! Very good)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Muy bueño (very good)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Aha, exacto. (it is!)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]'' Okay, that's good. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Well, I going down, okay?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Okay, you're going down- by the way, let me ask ya Cassie, do you ever- you've uh- you've actually met uh Sarah May in person, haven't you? <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Not. She's on Internet.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Okay. That's cool- but anyway uh- you got- you d- you have my Wii number, uh- you can reply the email with your Wii number and it'll be registered on the Wii network. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[very haltingly]'' Yes. So. Cool. Talk with you Chris. You are so cool. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Heh. Uhhhh. You flatter me. Tú me flatteray. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[Weak laugh]'' Well, see you. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[In his 'baby voice']'' Adiós. ''[sigh]'' <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós, bebé.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós, chiquita bonita. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>[Pause as audio cuts out]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -it again. <br />
<br>[Another pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So anyway, Chris. I've been working on Rabbichoso for a day and uh- I was just wonderin' like, it's- it's supposed to compete with the Sonichu, you know? If you weren't aware of that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhhh. I grabbed onto d- grabbed onto g I- grabbed onto the... that gist. I'm aware- I'm aware of the gist of the theory. Uh. I'm aw- I'm aware that you're- that you're tryin' to compete. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know what competition does. It's drives uh- it drives consumer interest- Well that's why you know- It's great. You have to compete with high quality things. ''[muffled]''- that's why I'm trying to help. You know, compete. Just so you're aware of this, OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I see. -see. <br />
<br>[Pause]<br />
<br />
===Rabbichoso And Animu===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris we've been ge- been getting uh threatening images from the Pickle Man. Did you s- did you see the left? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I've not heard from the Pickle Man in lo- in a long time. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Apparently there are multiple ones because this one is, uh, not a darkie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh-huh. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> It's good that they're leaving you alone now. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Seems like they found more easier targets. Seeing as how you became [[Navy|saltier]].<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh. You know I originally got that line- quote from an e- ep- episode of ExCel Saga. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> From what?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> ExCel Saga.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Oh, ExCel Saga. Oh, yeah, that's a good anime.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> AIII I-Falazzo! (''He means [[ScotPalazzo|Il-Palazzo]]'')<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, have you ever seen two animes, ''[muffled]'' and Schooldays?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I have not seen either of those. I like Steel Angel Kurumi as well.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, how much Japanese do you know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only a little bit. I'm not totally fluent. I can say that with all honesty. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something unintelligible, not quite Japanese]''<!-- It sounds like he's saying "You say you can't- can you speak with me?" in CHINESE. --><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Huh?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Never mind, you won't understand it.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[unclear] Chris-Chan. Genki desu-ka?''<br />
<br />
===Chris Could Kill Clyde===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, I just wanted to say, uh, you're doing a good job, like, keeping calm even though Clyde is here. I mean u- I thought you'd be, like, more angry at him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm being calm with you guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> -I would have been choking him by now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I'd have kicked his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Preach to the choir. Pr- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I'd make him choke on a pickle if it were up to me.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You guys can't touch me otherwise I'd kick all your asses. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, bring it.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris could kick Clyde's ass anytime.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Let's see Chris do it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Bring it to me any day of the week and I'll definitely show him a hard- day's night. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah I think you could kick his ass.<br />
<br>[Trolls and Clyde talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Sings]'' -been a hard day's night...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -never mind, just...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean that as a- meant that as in I would beat... him up. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Kick his ass?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm very strong. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. I'm gonna see you later, OK?<br />
<br>''[Unison of goodbyes]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> OK see ya. Thank you so much Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[ignoring his fans]'' Yeah I can- I can lift about my weight. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Like um- if Clyde were right in front of you, what would you do to him?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Like, what kind of style of fighting do you have?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, shut up.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I gotta know my competition. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Personal- in the physical offense. ''[sigh]'' I would definitely be giving you so much physical pain. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's not a s- that's not a style. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I would beat you up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He deserves it man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, that's still not a style...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He uses fisticuffs. He's a gentleman. Gentleman fisticuffs. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Whatever, I'll just see-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Stop arguing and just-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ''[Over previous troll]'' I mean, if he did that to my sweetheart I'd fucking kill him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well. He's not- he's not going to come over and kill me, I know that. He doesn't have the money. [pause] You know I'm surprised that you're mad here. You're much kinder in person I thought you- Now I'm just expecting you at my door anytime, just waiting for you to stand here with an axe or something. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Knives are too messy. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Ah, now a sword- sword's are usually better.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What about poison?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Poison's good, poison's good.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde, what- do you want him to beat your ass?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I was just expecting it, you know.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, you know what's another thing? I would definitely not tell you how I would be hurting you, but I would definitely give you a who- big amount of pain. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, he's gonna keep you guessin'!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he deserves it. After everything he's done-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Muffled by troll]'' -going to kill me, I'd like to know. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I'm just going to let you cover in- worry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh so you're never going to show up, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Oh yes I will show up. But you just won't be expecting it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't even know where I live, do you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Find out!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Maybe I should give you my address. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, you should track him down and kick his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> But I'm going to leave you guessing too...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Defend Panda's h- Panda's honor.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, hi Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> 'sup Julie.<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br>''[Everyone talks over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde's A Dick===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I notice her mic doesn't work. But still I'm just letting her know that- acknowledge her presence. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're doing well staying calm even though Clyde's here.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, Clyde's a total dick.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Fucker.<br />
<br>''[Rustling]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I mean, he's taken over everything. The IRC. This. I can't- no one can stop him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' -over there, so...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll:'''</font> I- I like Rabbichoso.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Of course you do. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll''':</font> It's funny. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I will not offer any new comment on it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, OK. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, when can we expect the next Sonichu to be released.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, we've been eager.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It'll be soon. It will be soon.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah just ignore Clyde man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean if you're going to put a hard date on it, you'd better deliver your promise. If you don't, I'll strike harder. That's all I'm saying.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. You're saying if I don't set a date, you're gonna...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no. I'm saying don't make promises you can't keep. Don't make promises you can't keep.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He'll choke you with his medallion bitch!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who the hell do you think you are?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I agree with Cogs over there. Maybe you should do just a page a day, not release all at once. Keep his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you telling him this when he hates you?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm giving him suggestions man, OK? OK?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Only thing he's gonna suggest to you is 'shut the fuck up'!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, seriously man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It's alright. <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Penny Arcade's slow.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh you mean like Penny Arcade or ''[unclear]'' or MegaTokyo?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they're just like- boring. Then they because sellouts. <br />
<br />
===Chris's Country Cookin===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Chris, where's your favorite place to eat?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. Can't really say uh- but I like country cookin'. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> What's country cooking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh no G's in the sto- no G's in the name by the way, no G. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah what's country cooking? I'm not familiar with that.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's like uh- som- something like Golden Corral. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But Golden Corral is a national franchise.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh Chris, how are your parents?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> They're OK.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br>[Long pause]<br />
<br />
===Sex Is Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I've got a sug- another suggestion. Now be quiet all of you cause I know you hate me. Just- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, Chris hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well don't defend him. He can defend himself OK? He's a man. But whatever-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let him speak.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm suggesting that- you go on and on about this sex stuff but you've never gotten laid, have you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I like to put myself in the imaginative situation that I'd like to be in and the sexual stimulation. So I can be ready for [[ego|myself]] for when I do actually have my first time.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well my first time was- I'll just say that it's terrible, OK? I didn't know what I was doing, she didn't know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let me guess, you prematurely ejaculated?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no, it's not like that you don't know what to do. Every woman's told me OK? You can't prepare-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Clyde]'' First time's always awkward...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -I learnt that mistake a while back, OK whatever. OK, you just- you can't prepare for your first time. You might as well just have a really bad first time so you learn from your mistakes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm not trying to defend Clyde or anything, but yeah it's kinda true. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Hmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The girl I first fell in love with is the girl I'm married to right now. Samantha just changed my world. But marriage does get boring.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Tips To STAY STRAIGHT===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I know how you say how important it is to stay straight, um- I'm having trouble staying straight, do you have any suggestions?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Watch a bunch of pornography with uh- with naked women. OK, a lot of naked women.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That happened to me one time...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, I have this friend I play video games with, is that gay? He's male by the way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry could you- I'm sorry could you repeat that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I have this guy I'm friends with he always comes over to my house to play video games. Is that gay? I'm kinda scared. You know? I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Hmm. Is he making any advances towards you? Personally. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I dunno how to tell. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Like uh sit- does he always sit next to you when he's playing games. Playing video games.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Yeah he usually does. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I see. Hmm. My- well- my suggestion in that case, would be to keep a heavy distance between you and that guy. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he meant anything gay by it though. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he means anything like- gay about it. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well, still- it's always best to find out- you can ask him. Don't be afraid to ask him. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> What would you do in this situation?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well if he said yes then I would uh- basically- let me think about that a moment. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you have any friends who're are like, guys?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only acquaintances and only a few of them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you play video games with people or anything? Do they come over to your house?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. No.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I remember-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> ''[Cuts Polly off]'' I'm just worried I might be gay or something. I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You probably are Falsion, but that's OK. No, look dude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Leave him alone! Leave him alone! He's straight!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Why?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Hey, let's have a calm conversation here. Let's not have any fights.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br>''[Trolls speak over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I've been reading the Sonichu comics and man, they are page-turners! Seri- I was on- I was on the edge of my seat for a while. I ju- I couldn't- I couldn't- you know. Just had to read and read.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Thank you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, can I be your friend? I know I'm a guy. I don't mean anything gay by it. Can I be your friend? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. I dunno. <br />
<br />
===A Wild Snorlax Appears===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Do you want any hotdogs?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I'm OK. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> No?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I was talking with my mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I was wondering if I could be your friend.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I h- heard you only like, you only like to be acquaintances. With guys. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, ummm. Let's just pretty much leave it at acquaintance. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hello Mrs. Chandler. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> She can't hear you, I'm wearing my earphones.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Listen, I'm not gay. I don't- you know- yeah. Never mind.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I mean- I mea- I-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What do you have against gay people? I'm serious to hear this. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's just unnatural and it's against God's will. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, it's not like it's a choice. You can't change who you are like- you're a creative guy but I mean they're just gay. They can't change that. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm just answering a few questions mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You don't have to answer. Nobody's payin' you to do that.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yes they are.<br />
<br>''[shuffling sounds, clanging]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> It ain't none of their business no-way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I wouldn't be asked questions like that by employers or anybody. Don't tell people what you d- what you think. Keep that to yourself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris what's hap- what's happening?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, obviously, my mother is offering her input.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Tell her you're just talking to some friends. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' I don't need no back talk from somebody on the other end of the phone.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear you, Mom. Hmm. Hmm. <br />
<br>''[scraping sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> These- these idiots don't have any brains or- they don't have any idea this way or that.<br />
<br>''[more banging, clanging and tumbling sounds. Sounds like washing up]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Is right now a bad time right now? I mean-<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Pixelblocks, Pixelblocks!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Someone's saying "Pixelblocks." <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you saying [[Pixelblocks]]?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>''[Chris's mom has been singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful singing voice, Chris.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[Audio cuts back in]'' -all the anxiety, causing you stress.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, well sometimes they don't; they can be peaceful.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Well, your mom and dad get the crappy end of the stick.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm, a lot of us do.<br />
<br>''[more clattering sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Yeah, just like this nasty mess over here that you guys left that I got to clean up.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm. ''[Audio cuts]'' -Yeah, I took care of my bills. I mean, not completely, but I took care of them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> What about going to, uh, Redmond?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> We! (Wii?) <br />
<br>[unintelligible, windows beeps]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[laughing]'' Yeah, sweetheart pool.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Mmhmm. ''[laughing]'' Like the other side of the pillow.<br />
<br>''[someone sighing. Clanging noises return after short absence]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' ...is all, I mean, living with your parents is okay bad-in today's bad economy, but at 26, come on. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Shut up, you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I'm being nice.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde isn't so bad a guy. He does bad things, but he's pretty cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah he's reformed. He's seen the error- Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How- how could he do that to Sarah? I mean- That's not right.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah. Well, that's like Luke... That's like Luke and Laura from General Hospital. I know that's like, before y'all's time, but, um... Luke was a rapist and she-he raped Laura and then, like, a few months later they get married. So... ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, I believe Clyde was trying to make amends from his past actions.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, but Chris, can you uh- can you forgive him?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Random Troll:'''</font> ''[whispering]'' White whale, holy grail! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Can you forgive a small-dicked Asian? Just a thought.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He's not Asian! <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm half-Asian, okay? My parents ''[unclear]'' I don't really wanna go into it. It's too bo-boring for you people. But this is why I ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you there? Just makin' sure, buddy.<br />
<br>''[clattering]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Move out.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Another Troll''':</font> Well, how do I do that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi there, my kitty. ''[In baby voice]'' Yes, there's a pretty kitty.<br />
<br>''[Someone speaking with a voice-synth]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hang on a second. I've got, like, a thousand different... Oh, Crass, why'd you do that?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Because. You can unban him but, yeah. I'm not gonna friggin' stand for that. <br />
<br>''[Sound of a vacuum cleaner]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> I (m j d?) do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I heard the "g" word.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um, is that a vacuum cleaner?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Yeah, sounds like it is.<br />
<br>[Trolls speak but are drowned out by vacuum]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ...room or something.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I think the vacuum cleaner... <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If that's the government trying to do some kind of thing, then my name's Rusty Shackleford.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's a loud fan.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I have a fan above my stove, too.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Hey... I do, too.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Wait- wha- wait. You-you-you're in the kitchen? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Me too.<br />
<br>''[possibly Sonic game sound effects]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmhm? Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I'm pretty sure it's already asked, but I didn't catch the answer. When can we expect the next Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I-I-I told you my suggestion of releasing a page a day or something. I mean, it's a pretty good one. It-it-it allows for a good time. Finish a page a day. You upload it. You know? It's very good. Works very well.<br />
<br>''[Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh. I mean- you guys keep asking when he's going to finish it but I wonder how many pages are going to be in the new one? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> The last one was like, thirty. Just release it over the span of a month. Works fine. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...go up to ninety thousand...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[mutters something]''<br />
<br>''[Sound of Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Down by the river...side.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful voice, Chris.<br />
<br>''[clattering, typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[unclear, repeating the same two phrases]'' Gone down by the river, down by the water side, down by the riverside. Down by the waterside. Down by the riverside.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember ''[unclear]''<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -I'm hungry myself.<br />
<br>''[some kind of alarm sounding]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Then go eat.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I already ate.<br />
<br />
===Anime And Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I wonder what anime Chris watches nowadays. There's not many on television but do you still watch Japanese cartoons? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[In a bad accent]'' Kawaii desu ne. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I want to watch Shuffle. He said it was very good. He said it was sad. I don't know if I wanna watch- I don't like sad stuff. I like to be happy when I watch anime.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, and um, do you watch stuff like Bleach and um Code Geass or Naruto or something?<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I'm glad to hear that Shuffle isn't sad. I'm definitely going to watch it sometime.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um, yeah Chris that was a good call on Naruto. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah there's a lot of people who don't like it much either. Too popular.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But please. Please. Hope. ''[audio cuts out briefly]'' Uh, Chris, please consider When They Cry.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Ooh, I saw that one. It was a really good series.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, I know; that was good, like- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah. Both seasons of it. <br />
<br>''[Windows beeps, voices overlapping]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I could link you to Season One if you want. Yeah, Samantha got me into that. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...you'll give it a try, Chris. It's a very, very good series.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Hm. Hey, Julie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...lots of ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Watch Shuffle. You got the six episodes of Shuffle or... Which o- which anime? I'm sorry. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh and JoJo's Bizarre Adventure is also cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I really liked JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. Very ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Za warudo!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah, I think Shuffle is quite all right. I like Heidi. She's sweet and loyal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> That's a good one. One of my favorites is Black Lagoon.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris have you ever seen La Blue Girl?<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other about different anime]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, uh, Chris can I, my, uh, I don't know if it's all right, but, like, could you like, give me an email sometime? I could, uh... recommend you to... this anime that... Polly and... Julie like to watch. They're quite- they... Oh, C-and Cogs has recommended such great anime. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[talking to his mother]'' Yeah? That's ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> As well as Julie-Julie's the person that got me into anime.<br />
<br />
===People Love Poketunes===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> -we can go into this later cause I got my headphones on. And, Mom, you know what something else? They liked your singing.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> What? I don't sing.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> That's my laugh; that's my laugh. They couldn't hear me. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They heard you. Singin'. Just now.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I can't sing!<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I'm tone deaf. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They just heard you singing, and liked your voice.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay. Did you write checks for all those bills and pack everything ''[unclear]''?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yes, Mother, I did.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You're not telling me no story?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm not telling you no story.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> OK. It's important [''inaudible''] did you pay them?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, I paid that one. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay, you have to be honest with me, 'cause, see, you're settin'...<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm being honest, I'm being honest.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> How you respond to what [we] talk about. You say you ought to something and you don't do it then that's gonna change my ideas ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay... I'll be sure to pay the remaining differences next month.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> No, this month.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I know but I couldn't pay them all with 90 dollars so there's still some left ''[sound cuts]'' ...oh, you're cooking them up here, okay, that's why you turned the fan on over the stove.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br>''[Trolls rejoice and mock Momma Chandler]''<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 1|Mumble Chat 1]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 3|Mumble Chat 3]]|}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Spanish]]<br />
==Links==<br />
*[https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBOVVDS0JtSDNvMWs Download]<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_2&diff=163000Mumble 22012-09-26T20:54:12Z<p>Irisviel: </p>
<hr />
<div>{{Articleofthenow}}<br />
[[Image:0839-MomDesi.JPG|thumb|right|180px|In Mumble 2, a Wild [[Barbara Chandler|Snorlax]] appeared.]]<br />
<br />
'''Mumble 2''' is the second [[Mumble]] chat that took place on 4 [[February 2009]]. More than an hour long.<br />
<br />
This is a more organized Q&A type chat than [[Mumble 1]]. Questions from [[Clyde]] about [[sex]] in the [[comic]] and interesting tidbits about how Chris believes sex is the same as romance. This is pretty hard hitting, with stuff like how Chris is into [[McDonald's|fast food]] yet he's against tobacco. A lot of drama involving Clyde.<br />
<br />
Length: '''1:49:17'''<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
<br />
===Notes===<br />
* Chris doesn't like Clyde because he stole his sweetheart.<br />
* Audio cuts out for a minute before Chris says: "...HYMEN!" (You broke her hymen)<br />
* Trolls claim [[Panda]] is with Clyde, Chris wants to hear her voice, they say she's busy<br />
* 'She and I WERE very close'<br />
* Chris didn't have $400-$800 to go and see Panda; claims he got this number from an airport website recommended by [[Miyamoto]]<br />
* Insists on [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] being in ''[[Animal Crossing]]''<br />
* Doesn't want to talk about his deal with them<br />
* Insists that he doesn't have to turn down his radio since his voice is louder (''it is horribly loud in the mic'')<br />
* Panda gave Clyde all of the sites, etc.<br />
* [[Sarah]] is going to be with Clyde, which Chris wants to deny<br />
* These motherfuckers keep talking over each other<br />
* Calls a troll's critique crap<br />
* [[Bubbles]] must be aroused, she isn't wet all the time<br />
* Bubbles is 90% water so does sperm just swim around forever? NO<br />
* Clyde: This is a children's comic, why so much sex?<br />
: '''Chris:''' It is romance. My best artwork is when they're making out 'romantic moments', drawn in protest to trolls. Shows that [[Rosechu]]s have vaginas, not [[duck]]s.<br />
* Admits to maybe going overboard<br />
* Trolls try to reason with him about the [[ED]] article: There wouldn't be an article if he didn't react like he does.<br />
* Trolls say that TV-Y7 means NO SEX but Chris points to romantic anime that have making out (cartoons are for kids, whatever the content).<br />
* Trolls talk about Japan being less strict about those things<br />
* Everyone gets to vote in [[CWCville]], even if they're [[Niggos|black]].<br />
* Got his idea from [[Mary Poppins]].<br />
* Troll tries to give historical background about cough medicine putting kids to sleep. Chris insists it was the lullaby that put them to sleep.<br />
* Discussion about Chris, 'gay message' sent by a troll<br />
* He calls Clyde a scoundrel<br />
* BELIEVE HIM HE IS STRAIGHT<br />
* Chris tries to speak Mexican at 20:50<br />
* Mexican speaks Mexican to him... he replies in Menglish<br />
* [[4-cent_garbage]] is located in Mexico<br />
* Someone says that he needs to improve his Mexican<br />
* Chris is against smoking, CWCville is smoke and alcohol free<br />
* Rehash of why [[tobacky]] is bad, his position on it, alcohol=bar fights<br />
* Chris's dad smoked and had several bypasses, has a pacemaker and has had heart attacks<br />
* Mention of his hair cuttings for his fans<br />
* Chris was doing math in his head, got in car crash.<br />
* Chris has taken college level math. Took trigonometry.<br />
* Trolls gang up on Clyde for stealing Panda<br />
* Time will tell when Chris will make the money he would have in the Nintendo deal<br />
* Trolls bash Clyde for his pot smoking <br />
* Chris doesn't watch news because it's bad news =(<br />
* Bashing of the Mexican<br />
* Chris can type 30 to 100 WPM, but can't type and talk at the same time<br />
* Chris says [[PSN]] is free though Clyde(?) points to the $1,000 Chris spent on PSN<br />
* Chris has been typing for 15 minutes now and it is VERY loud<br />
* Chris has been busy IRL therefore the comic release doesn't have a date<br />
* Someone points to nudes on [[YouTube]].<br />
* He does not have it on the YouTube, but he isn't going to take it anymore.<br />
* Claims some of the photos are photoshopped.<br />
* Clyde offers help to take ED page down.<br />
* Chris denies taking those pictures, doesn't want to talk about it, making him uncomfortable.<br />
* Some of the pictures are real. When questioned which ones are fake, Chris can't answer.<br />
* Chris hates Harry Potter because it was in competition with [[Pokémon]]!<br />
* Chris is too stressed to read Vivian's [[A Girl Who Brought Down the World|book]], but he likes the cover!<br />
* Polly, who has been talking the whole time is confronted by Chris who thinks she is a guy. Polly is upset. Chris apologizes.<br />
* [[Jimmy Hill]] has launched his Sonichu show<br />
* More Mexican talk at 55:10<br />
* Chris giggles and sighs happily when Cassie, another Mexican, compliments him and when she leaves he says 'Chiquita Bonita'<br />
* Rabbichoso talk (Sonichu.info)<br />
* Classic trolls are leaving Chris alone.<br />
* Chris likes Steel Angel Kurumi (''quote from [[Wikipedia:Steel Angel Kurumi|Wikipedia]]: often classified as ecchi due to the focus on fanservice and panty shots'')<br />
* Chris claims to be very strong, could beat Clyde up. Says he would show Clyde a [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force|Hard Day's Night]], and would give Clyde pain.<br />
* ShinyMarshtomp makes an appearance? Likes Rabbichoso<br />
* Chris likes to eat at [[Country Cookin]] (''like Golden Corral'')<br />
* Chris likes to imagine his first time. <br />
* Clyde says the first time is awful, Chris said it was because Clyde prematurely ejaculated<br />
* Watch porn with naked women to cure your gay<br />
* Guys sitting next to you = gay coming on to you<br />
* Falsion has been in the chat room and is afraid he is gay<br />
* A wild Snorlax appears<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
<br />
===Waiting for Chris===<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I can't wait to hear Chris! I'm a huge fan!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, goddamn these noodles are fantastic. Man, I wish I could eat like this everyday.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Have you eaten the rice balls?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no. These are noodles. These are-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Fan-fucking-tastic.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now they're all gone, it's fantastic, you know?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Sweetangie is Chris. Or, we think so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's definitely not the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm disappointed there's so many impostors out there. Kinda my fault, but, you know, if it weren't- ''[unintelligible]'' -hard to come by.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His mic was working last time he was here, just fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He usually capitalizes his words, like in every sentence.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is- I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Is it set to push to talk or something?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You better get us your email address Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah its push to talk. It's called push to talk. It's fantastic ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, just have him set it to voice activity. It works so much better that way.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Aww, he left.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> You guys are fucking idiots.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other again]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You guys scared him off by being guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, you fucking jackasses. Nice going.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Was that even the real...?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yes, that was the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He's too much of a pussy to talk.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, cause you scared him, or some- No, or he's too stupid to be.<br />
<br>''[Trolls Laugh]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Arrives===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Chris arrives, with radio playing loudly]'' Hello.<br />
<br>''[Trolls all greet him]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, now-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Why haven't you got your microphone working?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't know why my microphone [is] messed up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry, but we had an impostor here before.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm registered. I've got myself registered now. So, uh, hopefully-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> That's probably why. It had to like, uh- calibrate.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Well, I'm calibrated now.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So, Chris, have you seen Rabbichoso, it's fantastic.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't give a crap about your stupid pencil sketch.<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am not listening. I do not have to listen to ''you''.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Why, I'm not understanding [inaudible]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well for one thing,and I'll say it on here, you stole my sweetheart!<br />
<br>''[Cutout continues]''<br />
<br />
===PandaHalo, Trip to Redmond and Animal Crossing===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You broke her hymen!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I know it's a terrible mistake, but I plan to make it up to her. I'm getting married and uh- I'm doing the things I should do.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh and another thing, if she is really over there with you now, then put her on the mic. Please.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> She's not- He never said-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, Chris, she's very busy, OK. She's very busy.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's not over here right now. Okay? So lets drop it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, fine. Well could you tell her to please send me a message lettin' me know, for sure, so I can know- so I can know to-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' I'll let her know whatever you want, but it's her life. She doesn't have to send you a message. You failed her. You failed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' She and I were very close.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If you we're so close, then why didn't you go?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' Because I had- Aw, hang on a second. How do I- oh, that's right. This thing. Right. Mmm. Hold on a sec. Oh yeah, because I did not have four to eight hundred dollars!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It doesn't cost that much to go cross-country man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes it does. I know, I saw it on an airport website. Where I was be- Where I was- recommended to me by Mr. Miyamoto.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, you can drive there. It's not that hard.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened with that? I thought, um, didn't you have a deal with them or something? I heard a rumor that your characters were going to be in Animal Crossing.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, they are in Animal Crossing. And I did- and I do- I did have a deal with them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened though?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' I'd rather not say.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Radio, Clyde and Criticism===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, why don't you turn down the TV? It's hard to hear you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Annoyed sigh]'' I do not have a TV turned on in here.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I can hear it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have a radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I hear something in the background.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Burping throughout sentence]'' Well that's the- that would b- the radio. And it is not that loud.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But it shows up pretty well on your microphone mic. With due respect.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But still, my voice is louder than the radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Ah goo- ahh given.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh, Chris? Uh, when are you going to do the new Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something over Polly]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' Uh, I'll answer Polly's question. I'm not sure. It's, uh, it's in progress right now, I'm drawing it up.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I can't wait to read it!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Well, we'll see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Listen, Clyde kind of has admin on here, so we can't really do anything about him. So, yeah. I don't know.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Hard to hear over Chris's radio]'' ...with you guys. I love you guys. Just as much as Chris loves you guys. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I was angry. I was angry. But I'm calm now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't try to hurt any other person from now on.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm doing the best I can. I'm doing the best I can.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have much- I do not have much to say in response to that right now. Because I'm ticked off.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't let him get to you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're no better than he is, if you give in.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris, I just wanted to let you know I'm a huge fan of the comics, and I'm glad you keep doing what you're doing. You're doing a great job, and just keep it up, alright man?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, yeah, I appreciate the, uh, what's the word I'm looking for? The, the, uh- well, the encouraging words. Encouragement. I appreciate the encouragement. Well, there are things, uh- I- er- current events I do not appreciate. I appreciate the positive encouragement.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I can't really do anything. He took over the IRC channel. I used to be the owner. I mean Clyde. He's like taking over everything.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, it was because Panda gave it to me, you know. But anyway, I mean, you can't just listen to encouragement, you've got to listen to criticism, man. Criticisms are what make you better, you learn from your mistakes. You learn from mistakes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Be right back guys, my wife is calling.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I don't- I don't- Tons of people don't like the Rabbichoso art style, but you know, I gotta improve on that. That's something I plan to improve on. There's a lot of criticism in the death of Sonichu, right? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What? What did you just say?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a lot of criticism of Sonichu. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. For a moment there I thought you said something different.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What, what did you think I said? I'm just saying, there are people who like it and people who don't like it. You gotta start taking in those suggestions. You know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. So many things that will be improved upon. But, I just have to hear from Sarah herself that she really is going to be with you, Clyde. I have to hear it from herself. It's one thing to hear it from you and then it's- then on that note, it's just I find it very hard to believe. So I have to hear it from her.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I kinda think that Rabbichoso sucks. I mean, I think it could be funny, but it honestly looks like it's drawn by a kindergartner.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, Sonichu has evolved over the years. You can see that the art's getting better. Rabbichoso doesn't even look like something a beginner would do, honestly. I mean, ''[Interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A whole bunch of crap!<br />
<br>''[Everyone starts talking at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, Sonichu is in color.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I know, I accept his criticism. But you just called it crap! Now that's just rude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have emotions going behind me- uh, behind that opinion.<br />
<br />
===Cassie===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, did you get my message.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Aren't you going to be the gentleman, then? Aren't you gonna be the gentleman?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I just want to ask you, Chris. I'm Cassie's friend. She- she's worried sick about you. Why haven't you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did email her! As a- I- I haven't gotten any re-plies from her. I have emailed her and I have instant messaged her on A.I.M. and Skype. I haven't heard back from her. I don't know what's going on there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> ...you emailed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> When was the last time you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, hang on, I'll check.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris? I have a question. My fa- One of my favorite new characters is, um, Simonla, and like, I also like Zapina as well. Um, are they gonna have bigger parts in the series later on?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, could you repeat that question?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I was wondering if Simonla and Zapina will either have bigger parts in the series later on. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [[Sonichu_10#The_Final_Countdown|Possibly]]. Possibly, but, uh, I can't say for sure. Oh, and, uh, to answer your question, uh- in answer to, uh, I believe, uh, Screwhead, who asked? It was about four days ago. About four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Yeah. Four days ago? Okay, I'll tell her to check it out.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> The last email I sent was about four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> She'll contact you in a while, though.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I'll tell her to check it out and- and thanks Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright. Mm.<br />
<br />
===Bubbles's Pussy and Sex in the Comics===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris? I have a question.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, my favorite character is Bubbles, I kinda liked the, uh, the thing she had going with Blake, where she was kind of keeping the relationship secret. I thought that was kinda clever. I was wondering, uh, she's a water-type, so does that mean that her vagina is always wet, or does she have to be aroused like a normal woman?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, aroused. That's applied for all the, uh, Rosechus there. And also, like, you know, she's not just a water-type, she's also- she's a water- and electric-type, like uh- oh, shoot- What's the name of that one? Originated from Gold-Silver-Crystal series, uh, evolves from Chinchou? Lanturn. And she has, uh, she has Volt Absorb ability.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, Chris, another question following Bubbles. Uh, her body is 90% water, and now this thing about the whole sexual intercourse- about it. Now, don't take this rude, and you don't need to answer me... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...I totally respect your creative work. My wife actually got me into this, uh, show actually. So, what happens is- like, as you know, like, semens are like little fishes in themselves. Would that mean, I mean, would they actually have a route to fly into the egg, in theory, or do they just swim around her whole body, just forever just swimming around.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. The, uh, the internal or- the internal organs uh, for the Rosechus are pretty much the same thing, so I'd say pre- about, uh, as good chance as most any other mammal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, so you mean she's able to control her density a little bit more. She- I understand now. She's able to control more her density from the 90% water. Okay. That pretty much answers it just perfectly. That's been bothering me at work. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I got another question, Chris, about this whole sexual thing. I mean, this is a children's comic, right? Why is there so much sex in it?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. It's called romance, and my- and my- if you'll notice throughout the comics my best pieces of artwork among which were those where dey were kissing and making out. Romantic moments.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a hidden page-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' And because- and because- and because of the tension from, uh, the trolls and Encyclopedia Dramatica, I just felt like doing that in protest against them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, but childre-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' Yes but how is that really a protest? That, you know, you know, are, are you like referencing to the 60's when women burned their bras? That was in protes- That was feminism. Saying that they weren't slaves to men. Do you even understand the whole thing?<br />
<br>''[Multiple voices are heard at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Now, to tell you the truth, I never really thought about, I never really thought about that when I-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Chris]'' Then how is, stripping was, how was that protest-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Jack]'' It shows that they have vaginas and NOT dicks. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well you know the dick thing was the fact that they were just, you know, mocking you. I think you went overboard with that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well maybe I did. Maybe I did. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, you did, because that seems kind of excessive, kind of-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' I don't think they would have even bothered to write about an article about you if you didn't just keep reacting like that.<br />
<br />
===Chris justifies sex in a kids' comic===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I have another question.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The point some of us are trying to make is, if it's TV-Y7 that means there should really be no sex in it at all.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible over other people]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's pretty much incorrect, I mean, uh, there's so many romantic anime that's TV-Y7, and they shoul- they have making out.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, a lot of things in Japan, Japan has stricter standards-not stricter, I mean looser guidelines than America. It's much different.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear ya.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I was just wondering what Bubbles, um, she has a, that water whirlwind attack, I was just curious if you had any plans to make- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Butting in]'' By the way, that was a Whirl- Whirlpool.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font>Yeah, Whirlpool, sorry, sorry, Whirlpool, but do you have any plans to mix an, uh, Electric-type attack with that, since water conducts electricity, right? It could be a very powerful-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah, she did, she did an electric attack amongst the- the walls of that Whirlpool and she let out. In case you didn't know, there's a- little bits of lightning bolts among which-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, oh, I'm sor- I didn't notice that, I'm sorry, I'll go take another look. Thank you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hey Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> You make some pretty sweet Little Big Planet levels.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you.<br />
<br />
===Chris on Benadryl babysitting===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, there's a message from Cogs on the side, it's about, uh, do women not have the right to vote already in CWCville.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, evry- Everybody, no matter what age, no matter what gender or race, everybody has the right to vote in CWCville. Even if they're black.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Then what's up with the "Votes for Women" thing, I was-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Not just vote women, but- ''[interrupted]'' any other ethnicities, and gays?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't understand-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did that- heard it in Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What? Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, man, Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, yeah, that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's a classic. It's my favorite movie of all time.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that movie was, like, based in the 1900s.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but still I- still I agreed with that message there-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Taken out of context, that makes it seem like CWCville's set in the 1960s.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What message? That children should be given cough medicine so they'll go to sleep?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''What?''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that's what women used to do back in- That's what mothers, friggin' nurses and stuff used to do to kids in the 1900s, is give children, like, you know, cough medicine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Cause- cause the medicine- uh, correction, the medicine did not put them to sleep, there was a lullaby, not the cough medicine. They only had to take the cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ...because it rained, before dere, and it was not, and it was to, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Rain means cough medicine doesn't have anything to do with each other. That's not how friggin' germs are spread, or colds are gotten. Colds are gotten through germs, not the rain.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How is cough medicine any different from today's parents that just let their kids watch TV until they fall asleep? I mean, it's just as bad.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well- Cough medicine has a lot to do with the psychological effects of it. Obviously if you get- if you keep giving fre-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Thanks, Samantha, that was delicious.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's my, uh, Samantha-<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, that's we're all saying, cause I've heard that there's a lot of different chemicals in cough medicine. You could pick up a ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I don't even take cough medicine, because I'm not a pussy.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Anyway, I never put any references, I never did any references or plan any references to cough medicine or anything of that sort.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Well, Chris, Cassie says the last e-mail she got from you was on the 17th. How 'bout your being gay? Is that true?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[sigh]'' That wa- That was somebody had- That was Clyde hacking through my e-mail and spammed that to my contacts.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, I definitely did not do that-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You're a scoundrel-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -a slanderous lie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I did not do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Whoa-whoa-whoa. Wow. Well, thanks for that. She was worried that you were- that you don't like her.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> You're a scoundrel, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't do that. That was someone else.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I was wondering, because I've heard other news too, I was really hoping that you weren't gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Believe me, I'm straight.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I'll take your word for it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you. And, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Cogs- Cogs got a way- she showed us that, okay? I mean, you only ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br />
===Chris's fail-riffic Spanish===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So, Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, Screwhead's from Mexico. I heard you like Spanish, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hola, Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You know Spanish, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí. Conoso Mexico. Tomé dos años ''[unclear]'' mi escuela secundaria. (Yes, I know Mexico. I took two years [in, possibly] my secondary school.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has venido en Mexico? (Have you come to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, lo siento? (Uh, I'm sorry?)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has estado en Mexico? (Have you been to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Estoy Mexico? No. (I am Mexico? No.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[slowly]'' Has estado, um, in Mexico. Has venir? (Have you been to Mexico? Have gone?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Uh, no, I hav- no, no tengo pansars. ''[sic]'' (no, I don't have pansars (?))<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I think, uh, I think I meant to say- I'm pretty sure-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Did you just say you don't wear pants?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, no, I was trying to say, ah, I don't have plans to go in Mexico at the moment.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's what I understood what he was saying there.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, did you know that, that 4-cent garbage website is located in Mexico?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> That's why-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, that's why they can't get it shut down.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]'' borders, plus it's cheaper to run sites over there; they have, like, several servers.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wanted to talk to you, but she couldn't make it here, well, and, she wants to be your Spanish teacher, because she says that you've got room to improve your Spanish.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Oh, that Cassie. Yeah, I'm sorry, I thought you were- I got mixed up. Um... Yeah, um, I'm sorry, I, uh, I haven't talked to that- I haven't talked to Cassie in a while, but I've been mostly talking to, uh, her gal- her, uh, gal-pal and I'm sure- I'm sure she'd tell you a lot about her...<br />
<br />
===In which the trolls discuss bar fights===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey Chris, how- how does Sonichu keep Rosechu from spending more than a hundred dollars at the mall? I've always wondered how he could manage to do that. I've always had problems with that myself.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That wa- That time at the mall, it was, uh, Kel loaned the credit card. And it's like, yeah- she gave- she gave Sonichu the responsibility of that credit card. She did.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I've always given my advice on cannabis, you should do the ''[unintelligible]'', Cogs Chris, but I think she wants your response.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, one of my friends sent me this picture, and I think you might find it kinda disturbing just because they say it's proof that you're gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Aw yeah, I saw that, that's just a crappy Photoshop.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No, that one doesn't- this one doesn't look Photoshopped at all.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'm not gonna look at it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Oh, you're not? Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, uh, you say you're against smoking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. As a matter of fact, CWCville is a smoke-free, non-alcoholic city.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[partially drowned out]'' That's what we call a totalitarian state...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, and, uh, in the pilot episode with Seth MacFarlane, of, you know, Family Guy? He's always smoking. What do you think about that?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Go smoke.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I just- I just take that with a grain of salt, and, uh, you know, that's what-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, if he can smoke, why can't anyone else? I mean, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Because it causes cancer!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> So does a lot of things.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> It could be a prop pipe.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> In any case, I'm not- in any, in any case I've never done it and I never will.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, but eating too much fast food can give you a heart attack. I mean... so many things are deadly for you.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What about fast food, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> My father used to smoke and he went through a whole bunch of heart attacks. He suffered three- <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Well, I think that might have to do more with his weight.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He suffered through three or four triple bypasses.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I think that's... that's more like a weight issue.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He has a pacemaker!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, eh...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey ya guys, leave him alone. Ya know, my granddad, he smoked most of his life. He quit for 25 years and still died of lung cancer. I mean that's just the way it is. And your body never gets rid of it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, what about ''[pause]'' Chris, what about fast food? That's- that's bad for you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey Chris. Chris, could you do me a favor and send an email to Cassie? She's very worried about you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Yeah sure, I'll send her an email later.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, thanks.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, I've got uh, a certain someone you know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No no.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -she has to, uh, she wants to ask you w- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Also, she said something about some hair.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh yeah. Yeah, that's uh... that's another issue right there. Um, hmmm. I'll talk to her about that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, does, uh, drinking cause cancer?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, but it causes liver dysfunction and likely bar fights and automobile accidents.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, bar fights, but— <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Bar fights!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> -but I don't think that bar fights are that big of a problem.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I think bar fights are awesome.<br />
<br>''[People agree bar fights are awesome]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> But bar fights are bad. I got into a bar fight once and one of my hands got cut and two fingers from my left hand. Bar fights suck.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well, I think that might be more because you're Mexican. Are you sure you didn't lose them picking bo- picking grapes and- or something?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> No, Mexican people are more more- more much macho man; we get into bigger fights. We're more awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No- I think it might be because you got your hands stuck in some machinery when you were out picking in the vineyards.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't know about you guys, but I like- I like having bar fights.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Crashes Due To Math===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't have to be drunk to be in a bar fight or in an automobile accident, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but they increase the likeliness of it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You've been in an autobile— automobile accident, I mean, were you drunk?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I was distracted.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Uh, by what? I mean, it's kinda hard to be dist— you gotta be focused on driving man-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I was doing math in my head.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, math in your— <br />
<br>[Trolls talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> My mind got distracted by being its own calculator.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Are you good at math?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, is that for school?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Are you some kind of savant?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's impossible.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Guys, you're getting ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you like a mathematic genius or something?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> You know some artist people have like superpowers in their head. They can do like geniuses and add really well. ''[interrupted briefly by Jack saying something else about savant]'' Chris you are already an artist. Do you have any like, magical powers?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, I heard autistic people are really good at math. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Well not all the stereo- some of that sounds like stereotypes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[talking over Chris]'' ...it has to do with mental ability; I mean, what's the...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean I don't know- I mean I'm not saying that I'm a total genius. I mean I know- I know enough to get by.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What's the highest level of math you've taken Chris?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> College level.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I mean like algebra, or calculus or...?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. I believe I just did trigonometry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Very impressive.<br />
<br>[long pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So I was wondering. When did you get the CAD degree? I figured it's like a fine arts degree or something? I mean wha-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I designed a whole- I designed buildings and machinery and such along there. I designed the whole CWCVille shopping center.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don't you have a job then?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Your fans would love to see that Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' -I mean use that to design like, actual buildings? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I think I just told you I designed the CWCVille sho-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I don't mean in your comic. I'm just saying-<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde Isn't Popular And Chris Should Program===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well it's a good st-<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I heard you got some nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'll be putting an update on da YouTube soon, but not right now. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking maybe you could like, you know, get a degree in game design and make the Sonichu game? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah man, it's not that hard to learn programming. C++ man.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">''Falsion:'''</font> Clyde, he hates you, why are you talking?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm just giving him some advice, I mean C++ is-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you here? We don't like you. You totally ruined Chris's life.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't ruin his life. He ruined his own life.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yes you did. You've ruined his life. You raped his girlfriend. <br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks at once over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If he was the man he said he was, he'd have gone to Nintendo, made all that money. How- how are you going to make money now Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Time will tell.<br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks again]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, time will tell Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font>''[unclear]'' -need a plan, you know? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking uh, if- uh- would you be interested in getting a degree in game design. Making the game or something? Like if you had to? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Maybe but uh- I still have things to sort out in my real life.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah it's kinda unfortunate what happened with the Nintendo thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah- hang on a second, I'll be right back. Mm- ''[clattering]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So be honest guys am I really that much of a bother. I mean...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah you kind of are.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like a total dickfart.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You realize weed causes cancer? <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I didn't know that. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> And it causes the munchies. You're gonna get fat, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's okay, man, because I work out.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Do you play Guitar Hero standing up?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I play Guitar Hero while on the treadmill. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Will the Sonichu game be a- ''[muffled]'' -or a Wii one?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> It be a Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Wii would like to play. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh. I only got a DS. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I heard you are very good at HTML. Why don't you make a HTML Sonichu game? That would be awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't think you can make a game in HTML.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A- anyway I came back...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hey, Chris? How many courses did you have to take to get that degree in CAD? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -pretty sure you can make a game in HTML-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[speaking over]'' I'm took abo- took about two- took about two years to four years. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, if you can write HTML you can write C++, make your own games. Pretty simple man. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well it's something I'll consider. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde why are you talking to him? He hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm trying to give him some suggestions. I'm not insulting him, OK? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> HTML seems kinda outdated, so to speak. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font>I learn- I took two HTML classes so at least I know how to do- at least I know the ins and outs when it comes to like, workin' on it in the raw data- in the notepad.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> So you don't use Dreamweaver?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I also use Net- also use Netscape composer. <br />
<br>''[Someone starts singing 'Dreamweaver']''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I heard they went bankrupt or something.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't- I don- I don't listen to news because I don't care about bad news. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But that's not bad news that's just safety...<br />
<br>''[Talking over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why you gotta bring this bad vibe in here? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> OK OK I'll chill, I'm sorry it's just my wife- ''[can't hear over Chris typing extremely loud]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris you don't hear about these ones in a while. Like yesterday some guy in my town got run over by a train and he- he died. And that's a really bad thing, you know but you have to hear about it. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yeah but that's because you're Mexican. You Mexicans always play around the train tracks, what's with you? <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No come on, don't be racist.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> It's because Mexicans are stupid. I'm surprised I can use a computer. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' CrassCrab why do you have to be so mean?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> 'Cause my mother was raped by a Mexican. And I'm part Me- ''[muffled]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry man.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> That isn't fair to take it out on every other Mexican out there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His rule applied to millions. Just ignore him.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No I'm not my mother was raped by Mexicans.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> CrassCrab I'm tired of listening to you, get out of here. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Not all Mexicans are like that we- we- I am a nice Mexican guy. Not all Mexican guys are- ''[drowned out by typing]'' -Black guys are the people you should fear.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't get me started on them. But that will be another day. Cause I'm sick of hearing bad news.<br />
<br />
===Chris Types Fast (And Hates Hex-Box)===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris what are you uh- typing there?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm typing a email. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> How many words can you type? How fast can you type? Sounding fast there. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhh say about uh- sorta between thirty and a hundred. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's quite a good range man. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like "The Flash", minus the red jump-suit.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh Chris um- I was wondering if- ''[unclear]'' -game with Nintendo, would it be uh a Wii game or a DS game or both. I only own DS and I don't have any money for a Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[overlapping]'' Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wii, DS and Pla- hopefully uh- possibly uh, PlayStation 2 or 3. Never on [[Hex_Box|Hex-Box]]. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> When you gonna do this shit?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Why don't you like the Hex-Box? I mean I have an Xbox, I would love to play online with you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'd like to say this. Before Chris says anything about that I just wanna say that today my wife came home from the mall shopping for her usual clothes, that Gucci purse I had to buy for her. You know what she came home with? I wanted a PS3 but you know what she gave me was a frickin' Xbox 360. The Elite one? ''[someone speaks over]'' I know, I kept telling her like "Honey this isn't what I wanted. I wanted the PlayStation 3 so I can play LittleBigPlanet, Metal Gear Solid and Sonic Unleashed" <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You can put Sonic Unleashed on the Hex Box as well as Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Too whiny to make out]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Nintendo just- rejected your offer? Cause I- I heard a rumor that there was going to be a Sonichu game or something. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris uh. Cassie wants you to send her your Wii number so she can talk to you on the Wii. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright uhhhhh. I'll get- have to get my Wii number now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Send it to her in an email please.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they completely hate Sony. And they hate Microsoft as well. I mean this guy, Reggie? He always talks about kicking their ass and stuff. He's kinda crazy. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I know. Reggie's very mean he never brought out Mother 3 to America. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah I wanted to play that game.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talked over]'' -I'm tellin' you guys. Reggie's just a great ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Like what?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can- I can't say anything OK but... you'll see. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah so I don't think like if you got the deal with Nintendo I don't think they'd put it on like mu- like anything else but the Wii or DS. Yeah, cause that Reggie guy he frickin' hates Sony. And Microsoft. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font>Wasn't he also the head of VH1?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or Pizza Hut.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. What are your favorite places to eat at? <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember um he ''[unclear]'' -but before that he was with Sega when Dreamcast was out. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yup. Let me type this email please. I mean y'all keep talking I'll just listen. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's no reason to hate the Xbox. Let's be honest.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or um- Chris um- do you wanna release your game on Nintendo and on Sony. If you do talk to somebody like EA or something, you can like do um- multi-console thing like a (?) party thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[busy typing]'' Hmm. Well it's all to think about. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I mean Sega does third party now so um- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah well I'm gonna keep typing this email here. Y'all keep talking. <br />
<br>''[Sound of Chris typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's true, it's true. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Chris I wanted to tell you that Cassie's going to be here any- any second so you can talk to her. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Hm. ''[continues typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Don't you care about her? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[annoyed]'' I'm typin' da email to her right now! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah um 360 is pretty bad um- it red-rings all the time. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> I've had mine over two years. The same one. And it has not red-ringed yet. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Dude you have to pay $50 just so you can play online. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[echoing]'' Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah it's bullshit.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah it's totally free on PlayStation. And Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris. Chris. No, no, no, no, I gotta talk about this. [long pause] Chris...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupting]'' I get less connection problems myself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can't let you get away with this Chris. You spent over $1000 on the PlayStation Network. OK? And you say you can't afford $50 for the Xbox? Terrible reason. That's a terrible reason. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, um, Cogs I had a friend of mine whose red-ringed a lot of times. She did not like it at all. She got herself a PS3 instead. <br />
<br>''[Chris is STILL typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I heard that like- the PS triple eats up a lot of energy and like- has like- burned houses down. Cause it messes up the- no but the PS3 really- <br />
<br>''[More of Chris typing then audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So when's the next comic coming out Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I can't say. I don't have a date for it right now. I've been busy with the- with real life and such. You know getting the s- getting the website back up and all that. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh but I've been waiting so long. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I gotta tell you something Chris. ''[unclear]'' -to the trolls but I haven't done anythin' myself. It's run off into splinter groups doin' stuff to you. Ever since the Panda thing, I haven't done anything to you man. Everybody's been running round doing things. I have no control anymore. So I'm back here. This is why I'm back here. Do you understand? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. I hear you.<br />
<br />
===Nudes On YouTube===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I hear you got some uh- nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> What? <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hear you got some nudes on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> NUDES!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> That's what I thought- I have nothing na- I have nothing like that on the nu- on the YouTube. I've nothing like that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh someone posted the pics form the ED page. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> They're just tryin' ta get on- they're just tryin' ta get on my nerves again. But I'm not gonna let 'em.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Did you take those pictures or what? Where'd they come from?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Uh, are they Photoshopped?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah most of- Yes. Most of them are Photoshopped.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I can help you with ED. Chris I can help you with ED.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You can see the neck and the body doesn't quite match up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, Chris. Cassie's just arrived. She's a little nervous about talking to you, but she's gonna talk to you soon. Is that OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I just got one quick comment. The ED people were in contact with me, but I've lost contact with them. But I know you can delete that page permanently. I'm tryin' to help you man. You can get that page down forever. Even the entire site. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What, after you raped uhm- Sarah? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I'm trying to make amends. So let me do my business. All right?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's too late to make amends. Look what you did. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um. Cogsdev said she had a look at the data, they have it up in Image editing software.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah. Well...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I don't know what to tell you there. <br />
<br>''[Several trolls speak at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Doesn't that mean they're real? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I don't think so. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You don't think so?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Well, did you take them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Then where did those pictures come from? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who took those?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I don't know. And I'd rather not talk about that anymore. It's making me feel uncomfortable.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Are you lying to your fans Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> We don't feel confort- we don't feel comfortable. We're big fans of your work and we don't like being lied to. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I'd like to make a point. It might just be a doppelganger [sic].<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, you know the thing I hate most is lies. I like to spread the truth about you Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You say you're honest, but you're lying to us.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[clearly annoyed]'' Fine, fine. Some those pictures are real. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Some of them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Some of them but not all of them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Like, which ones aren't real?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'd rather not go into detail because I'd rather not look at 'em. Cause uh- ''[interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' -are you ashamed of it?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Do you not like to look in the mirror?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You owe it- you owe it to your fans.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, but- yeah, but- yeah, but upon looking at those it's like ref- it's like reflecting a pe- uh p- a past moment in my life where I- I was played for the fool. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah, by the man in the pickle suit?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh that guy- I hate that guy.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah I saw- he was trolling some other people you know? So you're not alone, Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he took pictures of me like that too...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That guy's an asshole, I hate him.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhhh yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He took pictures of my wife too. Sick bastard. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[I think she says he is a peanut]''<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br>[another pause]<br />
<br />
===Chris Hates Harry===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I just uh- never was fond of it. Ever since it came out, I was never fond of it. ''[unclear as troll speaks over]'' -just like I hate Harry Potter because he's s- he's goin- he's uh- in compe- was in competition against the world of Pokemon. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Well that- that doesn't make sense. But they're two different medias. Pokemon-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah but- yeah but still he-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> -Harry Potter is a book.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah but he poses as competition against them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> That's not really competition. I mean- <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talks over Jack]'' Oh that reminds me about books- Vivi- Vivian wrote a book and sent it to you. You never read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes. I am afraid I- yeah, yeah- I'm uh- I've been uh- so I've been under uh- too much stress between internet and all that. I'll ge- I'll read it, I'll read it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's been waiting for your response for quite a long time.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I like the cover. (pause) Nice cover.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he is right about that. That is a nice cover. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah the book is pretty good- I read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Well I- I will definitely make it a point to uh- read it. Very soon. <br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Audible over the others]'' Did you ever read Twilight?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I've heard th- I've heard Twilight and I've seen the trailer but I haven't seen the movie, I'll wait for it to come out DVD or Blu-ray.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br />
===Random Access Humor Python Style===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh OK, I heard a lot of girls like Twilight. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I see. Hey Polly does your voice sound like that, 'cause it sounds like [[BlueSpike|a guy talking falsetto]]. I mean no personal offense. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> That's not very nice...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm sorry. Believe me I didn't mean any pe- anything personal it's just like, you know- hm- kind- just kinda takes me by surprise a bit, that's all.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I knew a girl like that in high school.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Sounding upset]'' I can't help it if I'm born like this.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I'm- I'm- I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah she's a girl. I saw her pics. She's a girl.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I'll s- I'll take his word for it. I'm sorry I cu- I accused you there.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um. OK. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You know, aut- I mean- let's- it's just uh- you know it's uh- you know it's uh a bit- just a spot of fun. [[Random-access_humor|Stupid humor]]. Monty Python's Flying Circus. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> We know you love that. There's just so many references to it in the comic. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah I d- after they put all of the entire series on PlayStation Network I downloaded the Hamlet episode- that was the one that had uh- Jimmy Hill parodying himself. It also had this funny bit where it was like, you know- ''[in a stupid voice]'' "...and now it's time for The Robinsons, an everyday story about blah-de-blah-de-blah-de-blah. Dum-de-dum-de-dum-de-duhhh-dum-de-dum"- and so on...<br />
<br>''[A troll begins to speak but is interrupted by a very high-pitched Chris]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> "Morning Mrs. Robinson- Morning Mrs. Robinson. Comin' out shoppin'? Oh- you've been shoppin', what did you buy? What's this?-" 'What did you buy this for?'[Trolls laugh over him]'' -It was a bargain!"<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I've heard you do that before. I don't know where. Anyway uh- uhm- Whatever happened to Jimmy Hill? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I haven't heard from him in a long time so just assuming uh- he gave up or uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I think he got a- I think he got a, uh- children's TV program in England.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well he ain't botherin' me, so I'm not worried about him anymore.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Ye- but he's stealing Sonichu. Bastardizing it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah he did but uh- he s- but haven't seen any updates on his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' -profile, he's still doing it.<br />
<br>''[Several trolls talk over each other about him having a TV show]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Fails At Spanish Pt. 2===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' <br />
<br>''[Troll says something more about the TV show, but it's muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wants to say hi. Just forgive her English because she can't speak very well, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> All right. Just sent her the email by the way, just now. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Hey, Chris. It's me, Cassie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi, Cassie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Fine, and you?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm feelin' OK. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Why haven't you emailed me? I was really about-was really worried about you. What's happened? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry. I be- I've bee- I've been busy with the Internet and the stress and all that. I sent ya an email just now go- it's got my Wii number in it so you can add me to your contacts. I've been talking to uh- I've been talking to Sarah lot- quite a bit lately. She's been helping me with uh- updating the Sonichu site, since I've uh- since I'm working on uh- it's re-uploading and such. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Kay, I believe you. I going to check ''[pronounced like 'sheg']'' it, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You're going to where?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[very quietly]'' Check it.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> To check it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> To "shag-it"? Is that the-<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Check the email. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[still doesn't understand]'' Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> I going to check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, check email. ''[Laughs]'' Yeah I'm sorry I tr- I tried to uh- understand but it just kind of messed up a little bit. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don- why don't you two speak in Spanish?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhh. I'm not exactly fluent. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ¿Sabes hablar español, Chris? (Do you know how to speak Spanish?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí, hablo español. (Yes, I speak Spanish)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Oh. ''[pause, one of the trolls says something to her]'' Oh, eso es muy sexy. (That is very sexy.)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Ohhhh. Te gusta. Te gusta muchísimo, (You like it. You like it a lot)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> La verdad, si. (To tell you the truth, yes)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Me amos mis amigas muchísimas. Sons muy bueñas! (I love my friends (feminine) a lot. They are very good.) [Correction: Amo a mis amigas muchísimo. Son muy buenas.] <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Oh, eso es tan cool en español! Muy bueno! (That's so cool in Spanish! Very good)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Muy bueño (very good)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Aha, exacto. (it is!)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]'' Okay, that's good. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Well, I going down, okay?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Okay, you're going down- by the way, let me ask ya Cassie, do you ever- you've uh- you've actually met uh Sarah May in person, haven't you? <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Not. She's on Internet.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Okay. That's cool- but anyway uh- you got- you d- you have my Wii number, uh- you can reply the email with your Wii number and it'll be registered on the Wii network. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[very haltingly]'' Yes. So. Cool. Talk with you Chris. You are so cool. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Heh. Uhhhh. You flatter me. Tú me flatteray. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[Weak laugh]'' Well, see you. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[In his 'baby voice']'' Adiós. ''[sigh]'' <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós, bebé.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós, chiquita bonita. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>[Pause as audio cuts out]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -it again. <br />
<br>[Another pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So anyway, Chris. I've been working on Rabbichoso for a day and uh- I was just wonderin' like, it's- it's supposed to compete with the Sonichu, you know? If you weren't aware of that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhhh. I grabbed onto d- grabbed onto g I- grabbed onto the... that gist. I'm aware- I'm aware of the gist of the theory. Uh. I'm aw- I'm aware that you're- that you're tryin' to compete. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know what competition does. It's drives uh- it drives consumer interest- Well that's why you know- It's great. You have to compete with high quality things. ''[muffled]''- that's why I'm trying to help. You know, compete. Just so you're aware of this, OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I see. -see. <br />
<br>[Pause]<br />
<br />
===Rabbichoso And Animu===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris we've been ge- been getting uh threatening images from the Pickle Man. Did you s- did you see the left? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I've not heard from the Pickle Man in lo- in a long time. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Apparently there are multiple ones because this one is, uh, not a darkie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh-huh. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> It's good that they're leaving you alone now. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Seems like they found more easier targets. Seeing as how you became [[Navy|saltier]].<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh. You know I originally got that line- quote from an e- ep- episode of ExCel Saga. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> From what?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> ExCel Saga.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Oh, ExCel Saga. Oh, yeah, that's a good anime.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> AIII I-Falazzo! (''He means [[ScotPalazzo|Il-Palazzo]]'')<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, have you ever seen two animes, ''[muffled]'' and Schooldays?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I have not seen either of those. I like Steel Angel Kurumi as well.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, how much Japanese do you know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only a little bit. I'm not totally fluent. I can say that with all honesty. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something unintelligible, not quite Japanese]''<!-- It sounds like he's saying "You say you can't- can you speak with me?" in CHINESE. --><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Huh?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Never mind, you won't understand it.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[unclear] Chris-Chan. Genki desu-ka?''<br />
<br />
===Chris Could Kill Clyde===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, I just wanted to say, uh, you're doing a good job, like, keeping calm even though Clyde is here. I mean u- I thought you'd be, like, more angry at him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm being calm with you guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> -I would have been choking him by now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I'd have kicked his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Preach to the choir. Pr- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I'd make him choke on a pickle if it were up to me.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You guys can't touch me otherwise I'd kick all your asses. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, bring it.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris could kick Clyde's ass anytime.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Let's see Chris do it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Bring it to me any day of the week and I'll definitely show him a hard- day's night. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah I think you could kick his ass.<br />
<br>[Trolls and Clyde talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Sings]'' -been a hard day's night...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -never mind, just...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean that as a- meant that as in I would beat... him up. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Kick his ass?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm very strong. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. I'm gonna see you later, OK?<br />
<br>''[Unison of goodbyes]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> OK see ya. Thank you so much Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[ignoring his fans]'' Yeah I can- I can lift about my weight. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Like um- if Clyde were right in front of you, what would you do to him?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Like, what kind of style of fighting do you have?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, shut up.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I gotta know my competition. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Personal- in the physical offense. ''[sigh]'' I would definitely be giving you so much physical pain. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's not a s- that's not a style. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I would beat you up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He deserves it man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, that's still not a style...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He uses fisticuffs. He's a gentleman. Gentleman fisticuffs. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Whatever, I'll just see-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Stop arguing and just-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ''[Over previous troll]'' I mean, if he did that to my sweetheart I'd fucking kill him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well. He's not- he's not going to come over and kill me, I know that. He doesn't have the money. [pause] You know I'm surprised that you're mad here. You're much kinder in person I thought you- Now I'm just expecting you at my door anytime, just waiting for you to stand here with an axe or something. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Knives are too messy. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Ah, now a sword- sword's are usually better.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What about poison?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Poison's good, poison's good.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde, what- do you want him to beat your ass?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I was just expecting it, you know.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, you know what's another thing? I would definitely not tell you how I would be hurting you, but I would definitely give you a who- big amount of pain. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, he's gonna keep you guessin'!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he deserves it. After everything he's done-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Muffled by troll]'' -going to kill me, I'd like to know. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I'm just going to let you cover in- worry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh so you're never going to show up, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Oh yes I will show up. But you just won't be expecting it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't even know where I live, do you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Find out!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Maybe I should give you my address. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, you should track him down and kick his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> But I'm going to leave you guessing too...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Defend Panda's h- Panda's honor.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, hi Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> 'sup Julie.<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br>''[Everyone talks over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde's A Dick===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I notice her mic doesn't work. But still I'm just letting her know that- acknowledge her presence. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're doing well staying calm even though Clyde's here.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, Clyde's a total dick.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Fucker.<br />
<br>''[Rustling]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I mean, he's taken over everything. The IRC. This. I can't- no one can stop him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' -over there, so...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll:'''</font> I- I like Rabbichoso.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Of course you do. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll''':</font> It's funny. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I will not offer any new comment on it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, OK. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, when can we expect the next Sonichu to be released.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, we've been eager.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It'll be soon. It will be soon.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah just ignore Clyde man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean if you're going to put a hard date on it, you'd better deliver your promise. If you don't, I'll strike harder. That's all I'm saying.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. You're saying if I don't set a date, you're gonna...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no. I'm saying don't make promises you can't keep. Don't make promises you can't keep.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He'll choke you with his medallion bitch!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who the hell do you think you are?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I agree with Cogs over there. Maybe you should do just a page a day, not release all at once. Keep his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you telling him this when he hates you?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm giving him suggestions man, OK? OK?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Only thing he's gonna suggest to you is 'shut the fuck up'!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, seriously man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It's alright. <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Penny Arcade's slow.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh you mean like Penny Arcade or ''[unclear]'' or MegaTokyo?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they're just like- boring. Then they because sellouts. <br />
<br />
===Chris's Country Cookin===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Chris, where's your favorite place to eat?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. Can't really say uh- but I like country cookin'. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> What's country cooking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh no G's in the sto- no G's in the name by the way, no G. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah what's country cooking? I'm not familiar with that.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's like uh- som- something like Golden Corral. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But Golden Corral is a national franchise.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh Chris, how are your parents?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> They're OK.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br>[Long pause]<br />
<br />
===Sex Is Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I've got a sug- another suggestion. Now be quiet all of you cause I know you hate me. Just- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, Chris hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well don't defend him. He can defend himself OK? He's a man. But whatever-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let him speak.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm suggesting that- you go on and on about this sex stuff but you've never gotten laid, have you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I like to put myself in the imaginative situation that I'd like to be in and the sexual stimulation. So I can be ready for [[ego|myself]] for when I do actually have my first time.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well my first time was- I'll just say that it's terrible, OK? I didn't know what I was doing, she didn't know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let me guess, you prematurely ejaculated?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no, it's not like that you don't know what to do. Every woman's told me OK? You can't prepare-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Clyde]'' First time's always awkward...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -I learnt that mistake a while back, OK whatever. OK, you just- you can't prepare for your first time. You might as well just have a really bad first time so you learn from your mistakes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm not trying to defend Clyde or anything, but yeah it's kinda true. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Hmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The girl I first fell in love with is the girl I'm married to right now. Samantha just changed my world. But marriage does get boring.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Tips To STAY STRAIGHT===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I know how you say how important it is to stay straight, um- I'm having trouble staying straight, do you have any suggestions?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Watch a bunch of pornography with uh- with naked women. OK, a lot of naked women.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That happened to me one time...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, I have this friend I play video games with, is that gay? He's male by the way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry could you- I'm sorry could you repeat that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I have this guy I'm friends with he always comes over to my house to play video games. Is that gay? I'm kinda scared. You know? I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Hmm. Is he making any advances towards you? Personally. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I dunno how to tell. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Like uh sit- does he always sit next to you when he's playing games. Playing video games.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Yeah he usually does. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I see. Hmm. My- well- my suggestion in that case, would be to keep a heavy distance between you and that guy. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he meant anything gay by it though. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he means anything like- gay about it. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well, still- it's always best to find out- you can ask him. Don't be afraid to ask him. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> What would you do in this situation?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well if he said yes then I would uh- basically- let me think about that a moment. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you have any friends who're are like, guys?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only acquaintances and only a few of them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you play video games with people or anything? Do they come over to your house?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. No.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I remember-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> ''[Cuts Polly off]'' I'm just worried I might be gay or something. I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You probably are Falsion, but that's OK. No, look dude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Leave him alone! Leave him alone! He's straight!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Why?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Hey, let's have a calm conversation here. Let's not have any fights.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br>''[Trolls speak over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I've been reading the Sonichu comics and man, they are page-turners! Seri- I was on- I was on the edge of my seat for a while. I ju- I couldn't- I couldn't- you know. Just had to read and read.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Thank you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, can I be your friend? I know I'm a guy. I don't mean anything gay by it. Can I be your friend? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. I dunno. <br />
<br />
===A Wild Snorlax Appears===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Do you want any hotdogs?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I'm OK. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> No?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I was talking with my mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I was wondering if I could be your friend.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I h- heard you only like, you only like to be acquaintances. With guys. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, ummm. Let's just pretty much leave it at acquaintance. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hello Mrs. Chandler. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> She can't hear you, I'm wearing my earphones.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Listen, I'm not gay. I don't- you know- yeah. Never mind.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I mean- I mea- I-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What do you have against gay people? I'm serious to hear this. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's just unnatural and it's against God's will. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, it's not like it's a choice. You can't change who you are like- you're a creative guy but I mean they're just gay. They can't change that. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm just answering a few questions mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You don't have to answer. Nobody's payin' you to do that.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yes they are.<br />
<br>''[shuffling sounds, clanging]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> It ain't none of their business no-way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I wouldn't be asked questions like that by employers or anybody. Don't tell people what you d- what you think. Keep that to yourself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris what's hap- what's happening?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, obviously, my mother is offering her input.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Tell her you're just talking to some friends. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' I don't need no back talk from somebody on the other end of the phone.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear you, Mom. Hmm. Hmm. <br />
<br>''[scraping sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> These- these idiots don't have any brains or- they don't have any idea this way or that.<br />
<br>''[more banging, clanging and tumbling sounds. Sounds like washing up]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Is right now a bad time right now? I mean-<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Pixelblocks, Pixelblocks!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Someone's saying "Pixelblocks." <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you saying [[Pixelblocks]]?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>''[Chris's mom has been singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful singing voice, Chris.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[Audio cuts back in]'' -all the anxiety, causing you stress.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, well sometimes they don't; they can be peaceful.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Well, your mom and dad get the crappy end of the stick.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm, a lot of us do.<br />
<br>''[more clattering sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Yeah, just like this nasty mess over here that you guys left that I got to clean up.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm. ''[Audio cuts]'' -Yeah, I took care of my bills. I mean, not completely, but I took care of them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> What about going to, uh, Redmond?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> We! (Wii?) <br />
<br>[unintelligible, windows beeps]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[laughing]'' Yeah, sweetheart pool.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Mmhmm. ''[laughing]'' Like the other side of the pillow.<br />
<br>''[someone sighing. Clanging noises return after short absence]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' ...is all, I mean, living with your parents is okay bad-in today's bad economy, but at 26, come on. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Shut up, you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I'm being nice.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde isn't so bad a guy. He does bad things, but he's pretty cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah he's reformed. He's seen the error- Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How- how could he do that to Sarah? I mean- That's not right.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah. Well, that's like Luke... That's like Luke and Laura from General Hospital. I know that's like, before y'all's time, but, um... Luke was a rapist and she-he raped Laura and then, like, a few months later they get married. So... ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, I believe Clyde was trying to make amends from his past actions.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, but Chris, can you uh- can you forgive him?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Random Troll:'''</font> ''[whispering]'' White whale, holy grail! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Can you forgive a small-dicked Asian? Just a thought.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He's not Asian! <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm half-Asian, okay? My parents ''[unclear]'' I don't really wanna go into it. It's too bo-boring for you people. But this is why I ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you there? Just makin' sure, buddy.<br />
<br>''[clattering]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Move out.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Another Troll''':</font> Well, how do I do that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi there, my kitty. ''[In baby voice]'' Yes, there's a pretty kitty.<br />
<br>''[Someone speaking with a voice-synth]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hang on a second. I've got, like, a thousand different... Oh, Crass, why'd you do that?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Because. You can unban him but, yeah. I'm not gonna friggin' stand for that. <br />
<br>''[Sound of a vacuum cleaner]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> I (m j d?) do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I heard the "g" word.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um, is that a vacuum cleaner?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Yeah, sounds like it is.<br />
<br>[Trolls speak but are drowned out by vacuum]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ...room or something.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I think the vacuum cleaner... <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If that's the government trying to do some kind of thing, then my name's Rusty Shackleford.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's a loud fan.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I have a fan above my stove, too.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Hey... I do, too.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Wait- wha- wait. You-you-you're in the kitchen? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Me too.<br />
<br>''[possibly Sonic game sound effects]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmhm? Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I'm pretty sure it's already asked, but I didn't catch the answer. When can we expect the next Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I-I-I told you my suggestion of releasing a page a day or something. I mean, it's a pretty good one. It-it-it allows for a good time. Finish a page a day. You upload it. You know? It's very good. Works very well.<br />
<br>''[Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh. I mean- you guys keep asking when he's going to finish it but I wonder how many pages are going to be in the new one? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> The last one was like, thirty. Just release it over the span of a month. Works fine. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...go up to ninety thousand...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[mutters something]''<br />
<br>''[Sound of Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Down by the river...side.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful voice, Chris.<br />
<br>''[clattering, typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[unclear, repeating the same two phrases]'' Gone down by the river, down by the water side, down by the riverside. Down by the waterside. Down by the riverside.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember ''[unclear]''<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -I'm hungry myself.<br />
<br>''[some kind of alarm sounding]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Then go eat.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I already ate.<br />
<br />
===Anime And Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I wonder what anime Chris watches nowadays. There's not many on television but do you still watch Japanese cartoons? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[In a bad accent]'' Kawaii desu ne. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I want to watch Shuffle. He said it was very good. He said it was sad. I don't know if I wanna watch- I don't like sad stuff. I like to be happy when I watch anime.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, and um, do you watch stuff like Bleach and um Code Geass or Naruto or something?<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I'm glad to hear that Shuffle isn't sad. I'm definitely going to watch it sometime.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um, yeah Chris that was a good call on Naruto. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah there's a lot of people who don't like it much either. Too popular.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But please. Please. Hope. ''[audio cuts out briefly]'' Uh, Chris, please consider When They Cry.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Ooh, I saw that one. It was a really good series.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, I know; that was good, like- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah. Both seasons of it. <br />
<br>''[Windows beeps, voices overlapping]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I could link you to Season One if you want. Yeah, Samantha got me into that. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...you'll give it a try, Chris. It's a very, very good series.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Hm. Hey, Julie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...lots of ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Watch Shuffle. You got the six episodes of Shuffle or... Which o- which anime? I'm sorry. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh and JoJo's Bizarre Adventure is also cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I really liked JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. Very ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Za warudo!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah, I think Shuffle is quite all right. I like Heidi. She's sweet and loyal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> That's a good one. One of my favorites is Black Lagoon.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris have you ever seen La Blue Girl?<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other about different anime]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, uh, Chris can I, my, uh, I don't know if it's all right, but, like, could you like, give me an email sometime? I could, uh... recommend you to... this anime that... Polly and... Julie like to watch. They're quite- they... Oh, C-and Cogs has recommended such great anime. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[talking to his mother]'' Yeah? That's ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> As well as Julie-Julie's the person that got me into anime.<br />
<br />
===People Love Poketunes===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> -we can go into this later cause I got my headphones on. And, Mom, you know what something else? They liked your singing.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> What? I don't sing.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> That's my laugh; that's my laugh. They couldn't hear me. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They heard you. Singin'. Just now.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I can't sing!<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I'm tone deaf. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They just heard you singing, and liked your voice.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay. Did you write checks for all those bills and pack everything ''[unclear]''?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yes, Mother, I did.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You're not telling me no story?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm not telling you no story.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> OK. It's important [''inaudible''] did you pay them?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, I paid that one. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay, you have to be honest with me, 'cause, see, you're settin'...<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm being honest, I'm being honest.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> How you respond to what [we] talk about. You say you ought to something and you don't do it then that's gonna change my ideas ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay... I'll be sure to pay the remaining differences next month.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> No, this month.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I know but I couldn't pay them all with 90 dollars so there's still some left ''[sound cuts]'' ...oh, you're cooking them up here, okay, that's why you turned the fan on over the stove.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br>''[Trolls rejoice and mock Momma Chandler]''<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 1|Mumble Chat 1]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 3|Mumble Chat 3]]|}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Spanish]]<br />
==Links==<br />
*[https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBOVVDS0JtSDNvMWs Download]<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_2&diff=162999Mumble 22012-09-26T20:53:05Z<p>Irisviel: /* Chris Types Fast (And Hates Hex-Box) */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{Articleofthenow}}<br />
[[Image:0839-MomDesi.JPG|thumb|right|180px|In Mumble 2, a Wild [[Barbara Chandler|Snorlax]] appeared.]]<br />
<br />
'''Mumble 2''' is the second [[Mumble]] chat that took place on 4 [[February 2009]]. More than an hour long.<br />
<br />
This is a more organized Q&A type chat than [[Mumble 1]]. Questions from [[Clyde]] about [[sex]] in the [[comic]] and interesting tidbits about how Chris believes sex is the same as romance. This is pretty hard hitting, with stuff like how Chris is into [[McDonald's|fast food]] yet he's against tobacco. A lot of drama involving Clyde.<br />
<br />
Length: '''1:49:17'''<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
<br />
===Notes===<br />
* Chris doesn't like Clyde because he stole his sweetheart.<br />
* Audio cuts out for a minute before Chris says: "...HYMEN!" (You broke her hymen)<br />
* Trolls claim [[Panda]] is with Clyde, Chris wants to hear her voice, they say she's busy<br />
* 'She and I WERE very close'<br />
* Chris didn't have $400-$800 to go and see Panda; claims he got this number from an airport website recommended by [[Miyamoto]]<br />
* Insists on [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] being in ''[[Animal Crossing]]''<br />
* Doesn't want to talk about his deal with them<br />
* Insists that he doesn't have to turn down his radio since his voice is louder (''it is horribly loud in the mic'')<br />
* Panda gave Clyde all of the sites, etc.<br />
* [[Sarah]] is going to be with Clyde, which Chris wants to deny<br />
* These motherfuckers keep talking over each other<br />
* Calls a troll's critique crap<br />
* [[Bubbles]] must be aroused, she isn't wet all the time<br />
* Bubbles is 90% water so does sperm just swim around forever? NO<br />
* Clyde: This is a children's comic, why so much sex?<br />
: '''Chris:''' It is romance. My best artwork is when they're making out 'romantic moments', drawn in protest to trolls. Shows that [[Rosechu]]s have vaginas, not [[duck]]s.<br />
* Admits to maybe going overboard<br />
* Trolls try to reason with him about the [[ED]] article: There wouldn't be an article if he didn't react like he does.<br />
* Trolls say that TV-Y7 means NO SEX but Chris points to romantic anime that have making out (cartoons are for kids, whatever the content).<br />
* Trolls talk about Japan being less strict about those things<br />
* Everyone gets to vote in [[CWCville]], even if they're [[Niggos|black]].<br />
* Got his idea from [[Mary Poppins]].<br />
* Troll tries to give historical background about cough medicine putting kids to sleep. Chris insists it was the lullaby that put them to sleep.<br />
* Discussion about Chris, 'gay message' sent by a troll<br />
* He calls Clyde a scoundrel<br />
* BELIEVE HIM HE IS STRAIGHT<br />
* Chris tries to speak Mexican at 20:50<br />
* Mexican speaks Mexican to him... he replies in Menglish<br />
* [[4-cent_garbage]] is located in Mexico<br />
* Someone says that he needs to improve his Mexican<br />
* Chris is against smoking, CWCville is smoke and alcohol free<br />
* Rehash of why [[tobacky]] is bad, his position on it, alcohol=bar fights<br />
* Chris's dad smoked and had several bypasses, has a pacemaker and has had heart attacks<br />
* Mention of his hair cuttings for his fans<br />
* Chris was doing math in his head, got in car crash.<br />
* Chris has taken college level math. Took trigonometry.<br />
* Trolls gang up on Clyde for stealing Panda<br />
* Time will tell when Chris will make the money he would have in the Nintendo deal<br />
* Trolls bash Clyde for his pot smoking <br />
* Chris doesn't watch news because it's bad news =(<br />
* Bashing of the Mexican<br />
* Chris can type 30 to 100 WPM, but can't type and talk at the same time<br />
* Chris says [[PSN]] is free though Clyde(?) points to the $1,000 Chris spent on PSN<br />
* Chris has been typing for 15 minutes now and it is VERY loud<br />
* Chris has been busy IRL therefore the comic release doesn't have a date<br />
* Someone points to nudes on [[YouTube]].<br />
* He does not have it on the YouTube, but he isn't going to take it anymore.<br />
* Claims some of the photos are photoshopped.<br />
* Clyde offers help to take ED page down.<br />
* Chris denies taking those pictures, doesn't want to talk about it, making him uncomfortable.<br />
* Some of the pictures are real. When questioned which ones are fake, Chris can't answer.<br />
* Chris hates Harry Potter because it was in competition with [[Pokémon]]!<br />
* Chris is too stressed to read Vivian's [[A Girl Who Brought Down the World|book]], but he likes the cover!<br />
* Polly, who has been talking the whole time is confronted by Chris who thinks she is a guy. Polly is upset. Chris apologizes.<br />
* [[Jimmy Hill]] has launched his Sonichu show<br />
* More Mexican talk at 55:10<br />
* Chris giggles and sighs happily when Cassie, another Mexican, compliments him and when she leaves he says 'Chiquita Bonita'<br />
* Rabbichoso talk (Sonichu.info)<br />
* Classic trolls are leaving Chris alone.<br />
* Chris likes Steel Angel Kurumi (''quote from [[Wikipedia:Steel Angel Kurumi|Wikipedia]]: often classified as ecchi due to the focus on fanservice and panty shots'')<br />
* Chris claims to be very strong, could beat Clyde up. Says he would show Clyde a [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force|Hard Day's Night]], and would give Clyde pain.<br />
* ShinyMarshtomp makes an appearance? Likes Rabbichoso<br />
* Chris likes to eat at [[Country Cookin]] (''like Golden Corral'')<br />
* Chris likes to imagine his first time. <br />
* Clyde says the first time is awful, Chris said it was because Clyde prematurely ejaculated<br />
* Watch porn with naked women to cure your gay<br />
* Guys sitting next to you = gay coming on to you<br />
* Falsion has been in the chat room and is afraid he is gay<br />
* A wild Snorlax appears<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
<br />
===Waiting for Chris===<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I can't wait to hear Chris! I'm a huge fan!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, goddamn these noodles are fantastic. Man, I wish I could eat like this everyday.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Have you eaten the rice balls?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no. These are noodles. These are-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Fan-fucking-tastic.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now they're all gone, it's fantastic, you know?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Sweetangie is Chris. Or, we think so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's definitely not the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm disappointed there's so many impostors out there. Kinda my fault, but, you know, if it weren't- ''[unintelligible]'' -hard to come by.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His mic was working last time he was here, just fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He usually capitalizes his words, like in every sentence.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is- I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Is it set to push to talk or something?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You better get us your email address Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah its push to talk. It's called push to talk. It's fantastic ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, just have him set it to voice activity. It works so much better that way.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Aww, he left.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> You guys are fucking idiots.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other again]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You guys scared him off by being guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, you fucking jackasses. Nice going.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Was that even the real...?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yes, that was the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He's too much of a pussy to talk.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, cause you scared him, or some- No, or he's too stupid to be.<br />
<br>''[Trolls Laugh]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Arrives===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Chris arrives, with radio playing loudly]'' Hello.<br />
<br>''[Trolls all greet him]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, now-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Why haven't you got your microphone working?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't know why my microphone [is] messed up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry, but we had an impostor here before.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm registered. I've got myself registered now. So, uh, hopefully-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> That's probably why. It had to like, uh- calibrate.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Well, I'm calibrated now.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So, Chris, have you seen Rabbichoso, it's fantastic.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't give a crap about your stupid pencil sketch.<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am not listening. I do not have to listen to ''you''.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Why, I'm not understanding [inaudible]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well for one thing,and I'll say it on here, you stole my sweetheart!<br />
<br>''[Cutout continues]''<br />
<br />
===PandaHalo, Trip to Redmond and Animal Crossing===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You broke her hymen!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I know it's a terrible mistake, but I plan to make it up to her. I'm getting married and uh- I'm doing the things I should do.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh and another thing, if she is really over there with you now, then put her on the mic. Please.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> She's not- He never said-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, Chris, she's very busy, OK. She's very busy.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's not over here right now. Okay? So lets drop it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, fine. Well could you tell her to please send me a message lettin' me know, for sure, so I can know- so I can know to-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' I'll let her know whatever you want, but it's her life. She doesn't have to send you a message. You failed her. You failed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' She and I were very close.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If you we're so close, then why didn't you go?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' Because I had- Aw, hang on a second. How do I- oh, that's right. This thing. Right. Mmm. Hold on a sec. Oh yeah, because I did not have four to eight hundred dollars!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It doesn't cost that much to go cross-country man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes it does. I know, I saw it on an airport website. Where I was be- Where I was- recommended to me by Mr. Miyamoto.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, you can drive there. It's not that hard.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened with that? I thought, um, didn't you have a deal with them or something? I heard a rumor that your characters were going to be in Animal Crossing.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, they are in Animal Crossing. And I did- and I do- I did have a deal with them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened though?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' I'd rather not say.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Radio, Clyde and Criticism===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, why don't you turn down the TV? It's hard to hear you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Annoyed sigh]'' I do not have a TV turned on in here.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I can hear it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have a radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I hear something in the background.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Burping throughout sentence]'' Well that's the- that would b- the radio. And it is not that loud.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But it shows up pretty well on your microphone mic. With due respect.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But still, my voice is louder than the radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Ah goo- ahh given.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh, Chris? Uh, when are you going to do the new Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something over Polly]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' Uh, I'll answer Polly's question. I'm not sure. It's, uh, it's in progress right now, I'm drawing it up.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I can't wait to read it!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Well, we'll see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Listen, Clyde kind of has admin on here, so we can't really do anything about him. So, yeah. I don't know.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Hard to hear over Chris's radio]'' ...with you guys. I love you guys. Just as much as Chris loves you guys. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I was angry. I was angry. But I'm calm now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't try to hurt any other person from now on.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm doing the best I can. I'm doing the best I can.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have much- I do not have much to say in response to that right now. Because I'm ticked off.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't let him get to you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're no better than he is, if you give in.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris, I just wanted to let you know I'm a huge fan of the comics, and I'm glad you keep doing what you're doing. You're doing a great job, and just keep it up, alright man?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, yeah, I appreciate the, uh, what's the word I'm looking for? The, the, uh- well, the encouraging words. Encouragement. I appreciate the encouragement. Well, there are things, uh- I- er- current events I do not appreciate. I appreciate the positive encouragement.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I can't really do anything. He took over the IRC channel. I used to be the owner. I mean Clyde. He's like taking over everything.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, it was because Panda gave it to me, you know. But anyway, I mean, you can't just listen to encouragement, you've got to listen to criticism, man. Criticisms are what make you better, you learn from your mistakes. You learn from mistakes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Be right back guys, my wife is calling.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I don't- I don't- Tons of people don't like the Rabbichoso art style, but you know, I gotta improve on that. That's something I plan to improve on. There's a lot of criticism in the death of Sonichu, right? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What? What did you just say?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a lot of criticism of Sonichu. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. For a moment there I thought you said something different.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What, what did you think I said? I'm just saying, there are people who like it and people who don't like it. You gotta start taking in those suggestions. You know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. So many things that will be improved upon. But, I just have to hear from Sarah herself that she really is going to be with you, Clyde. I have to hear it from herself. It's one thing to hear it from you and then it's- then on that note, it's just I find it very hard to believe. So I have to hear it from her.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I kinda think that Rabbichoso sucks. I mean, I think it could be funny, but it honestly looks like it's drawn by a kindergartner.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, Sonichu has evolved over the years. You can see that the art's getting better. Rabbichoso doesn't even look like something a beginner would do, honestly. I mean, ''[Interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A whole bunch of crap!<br />
<br>''[Everyone starts talking at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, Sonichu is in color.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I know, I accept his criticism. But you just called it crap! Now that's just rude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have emotions going behind me- uh, behind that opinion.<br />
<br />
===Cassie===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, did you get my message.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Aren't you going to be the gentleman, then? Aren't you gonna be the gentleman?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I just want to ask you, Chris. I'm Cassie's friend. She- she's worried sick about you. Why haven't you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did email her! As a- I- I haven't gotten any re-plies from her. I have emailed her and I have instant messaged her on A.I.M. and Skype. I haven't heard back from her. I don't know what's going on there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> ...you emailed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> When was the last time you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, hang on, I'll check.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris? I have a question. My fa- One of my favorite new characters is, um, Simonla, and like, I also like Zapina as well. Um, are they gonna have bigger parts in the series later on?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, could you repeat that question?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I was wondering if Simonla and Zapina will either have bigger parts in the series later on. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [[Sonichu_10#The_Final_Countdown|Possibly]]. Possibly, but, uh, I can't say for sure. Oh, and, uh, to answer your question, uh- in answer to, uh, I believe, uh, Screwhead, who asked? It was about four days ago. About four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Yeah. Four days ago? Okay, I'll tell her to check it out.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> The last email I sent was about four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> She'll contact you in a while, though.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I'll tell her to check it out and- and thanks Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright. Mm.<br />
<br />
===Bubbles's Pussy and Sex in the Comics===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris? I have a question.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, my favorite character is Bubbles, I kinda liked the, uh, the thing she had going with Blake, where she was kind of keeping the relationship secret. I thought that was kinda clever. I was wondering, uh, she's a water-type, so does that mean that her vagina is always wet, or does she have to be aroused like a normal woman?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, aroused. That's applied for all the, uh, Rosechus there. And also, like, you know, she's not just a water-type, she's also- she's a water- and electric-type, like uh- oh, shoot- What's the name of that one? Originated from Gold-Silver-Crystal series, uh, evolves from Chinchou? Lanturn. And she has, uh, she has Volt Absorb ability.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, Chris, another question following Bubbles. Uh, her body is 90% water, and now this thing about the whole sexual intercourse- about it. Now, don't take this rude, and you don't need to answer me... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...I totally respect your creative work. My wife actually got me into this, uh, show actually. So, what happens is- like, as you know, like, semens are like little fishes in themselves. Would that mean, I mean, would they actually have a route to fly into the egg, in theory, or do they just swim around her whole body, just forever just swimming around.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. The, uh, the internal or- the internal organs uh, for the Rosechus are pretty much the same thing, so I'd say pre- about, uh, as good chance as most any other mammal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, so you mean she's able to control her density a little bit more. She- I understand now. She's able to control more her density from the 90% water. Okay. That pretty much answers it just perfectly. That's been bothering me at work. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I got another question, Chris, about this whole sexual thing. I mean, this is a children's comic, right? Why is there so much sex in it?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. It's called romance, and my- and my- if you'll notice throughout the comics my best pieces of artwork among which were those where dey were kissing and making out. Romantic moments.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a hidden page-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' And because- and because- and because of the tension from, uh, the trolls and Encyclopedia Dramatica, I just felt like doing that in protest against them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, but childre-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' Yes but how is that really a protest? That, you know, you know, are, are you like referencing to the 60's when women burned their bras? That was in protes- That was feminism. Saying that they weren't slaves to men. Do you even understand the whole thing?<br />
<br>''[Multiple voices are heard at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Now, to tell you the truth, I never really thought about, I never really thought about that when I-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Chris]'' Then how is, stripping was, how was that protest-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Jack]'' It shows that they have vaginas and NOT dicks. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well you know the dick thing was the fact that they were just, you know, mocking you. I think you went overboard with that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well maybe I did. Maybe I did. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, you did, because that seems kind of excessive, kind of-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' I don't think they would have even bothered to write about an article about you if you didn't just keep reacting like that.<br />
<br />
===Chris justifies sex in a kids' comic===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I have another question.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The point some of us are trying to make is, if it's TV-Y7 that means there should really be no sex in it at all.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible over other people]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's pretty much incorrect, I mean, uh, there's so many romantic anime that's TV-Y7, and they shoul- they have making out.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, a lot of things in Japan, Japan has stricter standards-not stricter, I mean looser guidelines than America. It's much different.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear ya.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I was just wondering what Bubbles, um, she has a, that water whirlwind attack, I was just curious if you had any plans to make- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Butting in]'' By the way, that was a Whirl- Whirlpool.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font>Yeah, Whirlpool, sorry, sorry, Whirlpool, but do you have any plans to mix an, uh, Electric-type attack with that, since water conducts electricity, right? It could be a very powerful-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah, she did, she did an electric attack amongst the- the walls of that Whirlpool and she let out. In case you didn't know, there's a- little bits of lightning bolts among which-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, oh, I'm sor- I didn't notice that, I'm sorry, I'll go take another look. Thank you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hey Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> You make some pretty sweet Little Big Planet levels.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you.<br />
<br />
===Chris on Benadryl babysitting===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, there's a message from Cogs on the side, it's about, uh, do women not have the right to vote already in CWCville.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, evry- Everybody, no matter what age, no matter what gender or race, everybody has the right to vote in CWCville. Even if they're black.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Then what's up with the "Votes for Women" thing, I was-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Not just vote women, but- ''[interrupted]'' any other ethnicities, and gays?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't understand-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did that- heard it in Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What? Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, man, Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, yeah, that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's a classic. It's my favorite movie of all time.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that movie was, like, based in the 1900s.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but still I- still I agreed with that message there-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Taken out of context, that makes it seem like CWCville's set in the 1960s.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What message? That children should be given cough medicine so they'll go to sleep?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''What?''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that's what women used to do back in- That's what mothers, friggin' nurses and stuff used to do to kids in the 1900s, is give children, like, you know, cough medicine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Cause- cause the medicine- uh, correction, the medicine did not put them to sleep, there was a lullaby, not the cough medicine. They only had to take the cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ...because it rained, before dere, and it was not, and it was to, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Rain means cough medicine doesn't have anything to do with each other. That's not how friggin' germs are spread, or colds are gotten. Colds are gotten through germs, not the rain.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How is cough medicine any different from today's parents that just let their kids watch TV until they fall asleep? I mean, it's just as bad.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well- Cough medicine has a lot to do with the psychological effects of it. Obviously if you get- if you keep giving fre-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Thanks, Samantha, that was delicious.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's my, uh, Samantha-<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, that's we're all saying, cause I've heard that there's a lot of different chemicals in cough medicine. You could pick up a ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I don't even take cough medicine, because I'm not a pussy.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Anyway, I never put any references, I never did any references or plan any references to cough medicine or anything of that sort.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Well, Chris, Cassie says the last e-mail she got from you was on the 17th. How 'bout your being gay? Is that true?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[sigh]'' That wa- That was somebody had- That was Clyde hacking through my e-mail and spammed that to my contacts.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, I definitely did not do that-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You're a scoundrel-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -a slanderous lie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I did not do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Whoa-whoa-whoa. Wow. Well, thanks for that. She was worried that you were- that you don't like her.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> You're a scoundrel, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't do that. That was someone else.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I was wondering, because I've heard other news too, I was really hoping that you weren't gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Believe me, I'm straight.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I'll take your word for it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you. And, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Cogs- Cogs got a way- she showed us that, okay? I mean, you only ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br />
===Chris's fail-riffic Spanish===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So, Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, Screwhead's from Mexico. I heard you like Spanish, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hola, Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You know Spanish, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí. Conoso Mexico. Tomé dos años ''[unclear]'' mi escuela secundaria. (Yes, I know Mexico. I took two years [in, possibly] my secondary school.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has venido en Mexico? (Have you come to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, lo siento? (Uh, I'm sorry?)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has estado en Mexico? (Have you been to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Estoy Mexico? No. (I am Mexico? No.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[slowly]'' Has estado, um, in Mexico. Has venir? (Have you been to Mexico? Have gone?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Uh, no, I hav- no, no tengo pansars. ''[sic]'' (no, I don't have pansars (?))<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I think, uh, I think I meant to say- I'm pretty sure-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Did you just say you don't wear pants?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, no, I was trying to say, ah, I don't have plans to go in Mexico at the moment.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's what I understood what he was saying there.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, did you know that, that 4-cent garbage website is located in Mexico?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> That's why-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, that's why they can't get it shut down.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]'' borders, plus it's cheaper to run sites over there; they have, like, several servers.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wanted to talk to you, but she couldn't make it here, well, and, she wants to be your Spanish teacher, because she says that you've got room to improve your Spanish.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Oh, that Cassie. Yeah, I'm sorry, I thought you were- I got mixed up. Um... Yeah, um, I'm sorry, I, uh, I haven't talked to that- I haven't talked to Cassie in a while, but I've been mostly talking to, uh, her gal- her, uh, gal-pal and I'm sure- I'm sure she'd tell you a lot about her...<br />
<br />
===In which the trolls discuss bar fights===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey Chris, how- how does Sonichu keep Rosechu from spending more than a hundred dollars at the mall? I've always wondered how he could manage to do that. I've always had problems with that myself.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That wa- That time at the mall, it was, uh, Kel loaned the credit card. And it's like, yeah- she gave- she gave Sonichu the responsibility of that credit card. She did.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I've always given my advice on cannabis, you should do the ''[unintelligible]'', Cogs Chris, but I think she wants your response.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, one of my friends sent me this picture, and I think you might find it kinda disturbing just because they say it's proof that you're gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Aw yeah, I saw that, that's just a crappy Photoshop.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No, that one doesn't- this one doesn't look Photoshopped at all.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'm not gonna look at it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Oh, you're not? Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, uh, you say you're against smoking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. As a matter of fact, CWCville is a smoke-free, non-alcoholic city.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[partially drowned out]'' That's what we call a totalitarian state...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, and, uh, in the pilot episode with Seth MacFarlane, of, you know, Family Guy? He's always smoking. What do you think about that?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Go smoke.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I just- I just take that with a grain of salt, and, uh, you know, that's what-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, if he can smoke, why can't anyone else? I mean, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Because it causes cancer!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> So does a lot of things.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> It could be a prop pipe.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> In any case, I'm not- in any, in any case I've never done it and I never will.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, but eating too much fast food can give you a heart attack. I mean... so many things are deadly for you.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What about fast food, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> My father used to smoke and he went through a whole bunch of heart attacks. He suffered three- <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Well, I think that might have to do more with his weight.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He suffered through three or four triple bypasses.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I think that's... that's more like a weight issue.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He has a pacemaker!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, eh...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey ya guys, leave him alone. Ya know, my granddad, he smoked most of his life. He quit for 25 years and still died of lung cancer. I mean that's just the way it is. And your body never gets rid of it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, what about ''[pause]'' Chris, what about fast food? That's- that's bad for you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey Chris. Chris, could you do me a favor and send an email to Cassie? She's very worried about you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Yeah sure, I'll send her an email later.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, thanks.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, I've got uh, a certain someone you know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No no.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -she has to, uh, she wants to ask you w- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Also, she said something about some hair.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh yeah. Yeah, that's uh... that's another issue right there. Um, hmmm. I'll talk to her about that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, does, uh, drinking cause cancer?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, but it causes liver dysfunction and likely bar fights and automobile accidents.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, bar fights, but— <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Bar fights!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> -but I don't think that bar fights are that big of a problem.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I think bar fights are awesome.<br />
<br>''[People agree bar fights are awesome]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> But bar fights are bad. I got into a bar fight once and one of my hands got cut and two fingers from my left hand. Bar fights suck.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well, I think that might be more because you're Mexican. Are you sure you didn't lose them picking bo- picking grapes and- or something?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> No, Mexican people are more more- more much macho man; we get into bigger fights. We're more awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No- I think it might be because you got your hands stuck in some machinery when you were out picking in the vineyards.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't know about you guys, but I like- I like having bar fights.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Crashes Due To Math===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't have to be drunk to be in a bar fight or in an automobile accident, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but they increase the likeliness of it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You've been in an autobile— automobile accident, I mean, were you drunk?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I was distracted.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Uh, by what? I mean, it's kinda hard to be dist— you gotta be focused on driving man-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I was doing math in my head.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, math in your— <br />
<br>[Trolls talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> My mind got distracted by being its own calculator.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Are you good at math?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, is that for school?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Are you some kind of savant?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's impossible.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Guys, you're getting ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you like a mathematic genius or something?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> You know some artist people have like superpowers in their head. They can do like geniuses and add really well. ''[interrupted briefly by Jack saying something else about savant]'' Chris you are already an artist. Do you have any like, magical powers?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, I heard autistic people are really good at math. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Well not all the stereo- some of that sounds like stereotypes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[talking over Chris]'' ...it has to do with mental ability; I mean, what's the...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean I don't know- I mean I'm not saying that I'm a total genius. I mean I know- I know enough to get by.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What's the highest level of math you've taken Chris?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> College level.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I mean like algebra, or calculus or...?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. I believe I just did trigonometry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Very impressive.<br />
<br>[long pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So I was wondering. When did you get the CAD degree? I figured it's like a fine arts degree or something? I mean wha-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I designed a whole- I designed buildings and machinery and such along there. I designed the whole CWCVille shopping center.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don't you have a job then?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Your fans would love to see that Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' -I mean use that to design like, actual buildings? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I think I just told you I designed the CWCVille sho-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I don't mean in your comic. I'm just saying-<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde Isn't Popular And Chris Should Program===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well it's a good st-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So I heard you got some nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'll be putting an update on da YouTube soon, but not right now. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking maybe you could like, you know, get a degree in game design and make the Sonichu game? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah man, it's not that hard to learn programming. C++ man.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">''Falsion:'''</font> Clyde, he hates you, why are you talking?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm just giving him some advice, I mean C++ is-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you here? We don't like you. You totally ruined Chris's life.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't ruin his life. He ruined his own life.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yes you did. You've ruined his life. You raped his girlfriend. <br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks at once over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If he was the man he said he was, he'd have gone to Nintendo, made all that money. How- how are you going to make money now Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Time will tell.<br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks again]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, time will tell Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font>''[unclear]'' -need a plan, you know? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking uh, if- uh- would you be interested in getting a degree in game design. Making the game or something? Like if you had to? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Maybe but uh- I still have things to sort out in my real life.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah it's kinda unfortunate what happened with the Nintendo thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah- hang on a second, I'll be right back. Mm- ''[clattering]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So be honest guys am I really that much of a bother. I mean...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah you kind of are.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like a total dickfart.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You realize weed causes cancer? <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I didn't know that. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> And it causes the munchies. You're gonna get fat, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's okay, man, because I work out.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Do you play Guitar Hero standing up?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I play Guitar Hero while on the treadmill. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Will the Sonichu game be a- ''[muffled]'' -or a Wii one?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> It be a Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Wii would like to play. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh. I only got a DS. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I heard you are very good at HTML. Why don't you make a HTML Sonichu game? That would be awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't think you can make a game in HTML.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A- anyway I came back...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hey, Chris? How many courses did you have to take to get that degree in CAD? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -pretty sure you can make a game in HTML-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[speaking over]'' I'm took abo- took about two- took about two years to four years. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, if you can write HTML you can write C++, make your own games. Pretty simple man. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well it's something I'll consider. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde why are you talking to him? He hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm trying to give him some suggestions. I'm not insulting him, OK? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> HTML seems kinda outdated, so to speak. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font>I learn- I took two HTML classes so at least I know how to do- at least I know the ins and outs when it comes to like, workin' on it in the raw data- in the notepad.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> So you don't use Dreamweaver?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I also use Net- also use Netscape composer. <br />
<br>''[Someone starts singing 'Dreamweaver']''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I heard they went bankrupt or something.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't- I don- I don't listen to news because I don't care about bad news. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But that's not bad news that's just safety...<br />
<br>''[Talking over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why you gotta bring this bad vibe in here? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> OK OK I'll chill, I'm sorry it's just my wife- ''[can't hear over Chris typing extremely loud]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris you don't hear about these ones in a while. Like yesterday some guy in my town got run over by a train and he- he died. And that's a really bad thing, you know but you have to hear about it. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yeah but that's because you're Mexican. You Mexicans always play around the train tracks, what's with you? <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No come on, don't be racist.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> It's because Mexicans are stupid. I'm surprised I can use a computer. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' CrassCrab why do you have to be so mean?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> 'Cause my mother was raped by a Mexican. And I'm part Me- ''[muffled]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry man.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> That isn't fair to take it out on every other Mexican out there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His rule applied to millions. Just ignore him.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No I'm not my mother was raped by Mexicans.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> CrassCrab I'm tired of listening to you, get out of here. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Not all Mexicans are like that we- we- I am a nice Mexican guy. Not all Mexican guys are- ''[drowned out by typing]'' -Black guys are the people you should fear.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't get me started on them. But that will be another day. Cause I'm sick of hearing bad news.<br />
<br />
===Chris Types Fast (And Hates Hex-Box)===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris what are you uh- typing there?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm typing a email. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> How many words can you type? How fast can you type? Sounding fast there. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhh say about uh- sorta between thirty and a hundred. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's quite a good range man. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like "The Flash", minus the red jump-suit.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh Chris um- I was wondering if- ''[unclear]'' -game with Nintendo, would it be uh a Wii game or a DS game or both. I only own DS and I don't have any money for a Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[overlapping]'' Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wii, DS and Pla- hopefully uh- possibly uh, PlayStation 2 or 3. Never on [[Hex_Box|Hex-Box]]. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> When you gonna do this shit?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Why don't you like the Hex-Box? I mean I have an Xbox, I would love to play online with you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'd like to say this. Before Chris says anything about that I just wanna say that today my wife came home from the mall shopping for her usual clothes, that Gucci purse I had to buy for her. You know what she came home with? I wanted a PS3 but you know what she gave me was a frickin' Xbox 360. The Elite one? ''[someone speaks over]'' I know, I kept telling her like "Honey this isn't what I wanted. I wanted the PlayStation 3 so I can play LittleBigPlanet, Metal Gear Solid and Sonic Unleashed" <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You can put Sonic Unleashed on the Hex Box as well as Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Too whiny to make out]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Nintendo just- rejected your offer? Cause I- I heard a rumor that there was going to be a Sonichu game or something. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris uh. Cassie wants you to send her your Wii number so she can talk to you on the Wii. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright uhhhhh. I'll get- have to get my Wii number now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Send it to her in an email please.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they completely hate Sony. And they hate Microsoft as well. I mean this guy, Reggie? He always talks about kicking their ass and stuff. He's kinda crazy. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I know. Reggie's very mean he never brought out Mother 3 to America. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah I wanted to play that game.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talked over]'' -I'm tellin' you guys. Reggie's just a great ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Like what?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can- I can't say anything OK but... you'll see. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah so I don't think like if you got the deal with Nintendo I don't think they'd put it on like mu- like anything else but the Wii or DS. Yeah, cause that Reggie guy he frickin' hates Sony. And Microsoft. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font>Wasn't he also the head of VH1?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or Pizza Hut.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. What are your favorite places to eat at? <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember um he ''[unclear]'' -but before that he was with Sega when Dreamcast was out. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yup. Let me type this email please. I mean y'all keep talking I'll just listen. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's no reason to hate the Xbox. Let's be honest.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or um- Chris um- do you wanna release your game on Nintendo and on Sony. If you do talk to somebody like EA or something, you can like do um- multi-console thing like a (?) party thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[busy typing]'' Hmm. Well it's all to think about. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I mean Sega does third party now so um- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah well I'm gonna keep typing this email here. Y'all keep talking. <br />
<br>''[Sound of Chris typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's true, it's true. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Chris I wanted to tell you that Cassie's going to be here any- any second so you can talk to her. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Hm. ''[continues typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Don't you care about her? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[annoyed]'' I'm typin' da email to her right now! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah um 360 is pretty bad um- it red-rings all the time. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> I've had mine over two years. The same one. And it has not red-ringed yet. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Dude you have to pay $50 just so you can play online. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[echoing]'' Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah it's bullshit.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah it's totally free on PlayStation. And Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris. Chris. No, no, no, no, I gotta talk about this. [long pause] Chris...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupting]'' I get less connection problems myself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can't let you get away with this Chris. You spent over $1000 on the PlayStation Network. OK? And you say you can't afford $50 for the Xbox? Terrible reason. That's a terrible reason. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, um, Cogs I had a friend of mine whose red-ringed a lot of times. She did not like it at all. She got herself a PS3 instead. <br />
<br>''[Chris is STILL typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I heard that like- the PS triple eats up a lot of energy and like- has like- burned houses down. Cause it messes up the- no but the PS3 really- <br />
<br>''[More of Chris typing then audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So when's the next comic coming out Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I can't say. I don't have a date for it right now. I've been busy with the- with real life and such. You know getting the s- getting the website back up and all that. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh but I've been waiting so long. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I gotta tell you something Chris. ''[unclear]'' -to the trolls but I haven't done anythin' myself. It's run off into splinter groups doin' stuff to you. Ever since the Panda thing, I haven't done anything to you man. Everybody's been running round doing things. I have no control anymore. So I'm back here. This is why I'm back here. Do you understand? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. I hear you.<br />
<br />
===Nudes On YouTube===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I hear you got some uh- nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> What? <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hear you got some nudes on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> NUDES!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> That's what I thought- I have nothing na- I have nothing like that on the nu- on the YouTube. I've nothing like that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh someone posted the pics form the ED page. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> They're just tryin' ta get on- they're just tryin' ta get on my nerves again. But I'm not gonna let 'em.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Did you take those pictures or what? Where'd they come from?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Uh, are they Photoshopped?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah most of- Yes. Most of them are Photoshopped.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I can help you with ED. Chris I can help you with ED.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You can see the neck and the body doesn't quite match up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, Chris. Cassie's just arrived. She's a little nervous about talking to you, but she's gonna talk to you soon. Is that OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I just got one quick comment. The ED people were in contact with me, but I've lost contact with them. But I know you can delete that page permanently. I'm tryin' to help you man. You can get that page down forever. Even the entire site. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What, after you raped uhm- Sarah? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I'm trying to make amends. So let me do my business. All right?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's too late to make amends. Look what you did. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um. Cogsdev said she had a look at the data, they have it up in Image editing software.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah. Well...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I don't know what to tell you there. <br />
<br>''[Several trolls speak at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Doesn't that mean they're real? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I don't think so. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You don't think so?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Well, did you take them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Then where did those pictures come from? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who took those?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I don't know. And I'd rather not talk about that anymore. It's making me feel uncomfortable.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Are you lying to your fans Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> We don't feel confort- we don't feel comfortable. We're big fans of your work and we don't like being lied to. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I'd like to make a point. It might just be a doppelganger [sic].<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, you know the thing I hate most is lies. I like to spread the truth about you Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You say you're honest, but you're lying to us.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[clearly annoyed]'' Fine, fine. Some those pictures are real. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Some of them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Some of them but not all of them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Like, which ones aren't real?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'd rather not go into detail because I'd rather not look at 'em. Cause uh- ''[interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' -are you ashamed of it?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Do you not like to look in the mirror?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You owe it- you owe it to your fans.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, but- yeah, but- yeah, but upon looking at those it's like ref- it's like reflecting a pe- uh p- a past moment in my life where I- I was played for the fool. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah, by the man in the pickle suit?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh that guy- I hate that guy.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah I saw- he was trolling some other people you know? So you're not alone, Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he took pictures of me like that too...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That guy's an asshole, I hate him.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhhh yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He took pictures of my wife too. Sick bastard. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[I think she says he is a peanut]''<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br>[another pause]<br />
<br />
===Chris Hates Harry===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I just uh- never was fond of it. Ever since it came out, I was never fond of it. ''[unclear as troll speaks over]'' -just like I hate Harry Potter because he's s- he's goin- he's uh- in compe- was in competition against the world of Pokemon. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Well that- that doesn't make sense. But they're two different medias. Pokemon-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah but- yeah but still he-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> -Harry Potter is a book.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah but he poses as competition against them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> That's not really competition. I mean- <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talks over Jack]'' Oh that reminds me about books- Vivi- Vivian wrote a book and sent it to you. You never read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes. I am afraid I- yeah, yeah- I'm uh- I've been uh- so I've been under uh- too much stress between internet and all that. I'll ge- I'll read it, I'll read it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's been waiting for your response for quite a long time.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I like the cover. (pause) Nice cover.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he is right about that. That is a nice cover. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah the book is pretty good- I read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Well I- I will definitely make it a point to uh- read it. Very soon. <br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Audible over the others]'' Did you ever read Twilight?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I've heard th- I've heard Twilight and I've seen the trailer but I haven't seen the movie, I'll wait for it to come out DVD or Blu-ray.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br />
===Random Access Humor Python Style===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh OK, I heard a lot of girls like Twilight. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I see. Hey Polly does your voice sound like that, 'cause it sounds like [[BlueSpike|a guy talking falsetto]]. I mean no personal offense. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> That's not very nice...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm sorry. Believe me I didn't mean any pe- anything personal it's just like, you know- hm- kind- just kinda takes me by surprise a bit, that's all.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I knew a girl like that in high school.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Sounding upset]'' I can't help it if I'm born like this.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I'm- I'm- I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah she's a girl. I saw her pics. She's a girl.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I'll s- I'll take his word for it. I'm sorry I cu- I accused you there.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um. OK. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You know, aut- I mean- let's- it's just uh- you know it's uh- you know it's uh a bit- just a spot of fun. [[Random-access_humor|Stupid humor]]. Monty Python's Flying Circus. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> We know you love that. There's just so many references to it in the comic. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah I d- after they put all of the entire series on PlayStation Network I downloaded the Hamlet episode- that was the one that had uh- Jimmy Hill parodying himself. It also had this funny bit where it was like, you know- ''[in a stupid voice]'' "...and now it's time for The Robinsons, an everyday story about blah-de-blah-de-blah-de-blah. Dum-de-dum-de-dum-de-duhhh-dum-de-dum"- and so on...<br />
<br>''[A troll begins to speak but is interrupted by a very high-pitched Chris]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> "Morning Mrs. Robinson- Morning Mrs. Robinson. Comin' out shoppin'? Oh- you've been shoppin', what did you buy? What's this?-" 'What did you buy this for?'[Trolls laugh over him]'' -It was a bargain!"<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I've heard you do that before. I don't know where. Anyway uh- uhm- Whatever happened to Jimmy Hill? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I haven't heard from him in a long time so just assuming uh- he gave up or uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I think he got a- I think he got a, uh- children's TV program in England.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well he ain't botherin' me, so I'm not worried about him anymore.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Ye- but he's stealing Sonichu. Bastardizing it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah he did but uh- he s- but haven't seen any updates on his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' -profile, he's still doing it.<br />
<br>''[Several trolls talk over each other about him having a TV show]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Fails At Spanish Pt. 2===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' <br />
<br>''[Troll says something more about the TV show, but it's muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wants to say hi. Just forgive her English because she can't speak very well, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> All right. Just sent her the email by the way, just now. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Hey, Chris. It's me, Cassie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi, Cassie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Fine, and you?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm feelin' OK. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Why haven't you emailed me? I was really about-was really worried about you. What's happened? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry. I be- I've bee- I've been busy with the Internet and the stress and all that. I sent ya an email just now go- it's got my Wii number in it so you can add me to your contacts. I've been talking to uh- I've been talking to Sarah lot- quite a bit lately. She's been helping me with uh- updating the Sonichu site, since I've uh- since I'm working on uh- it's re-uploading and such. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Kay, I believe you. I going to check ''[pronounced like 'sheg']'' it, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You're going to where?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[very quietly]'' Check it.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> To check it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> To "shag-it"? Is that the-<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Check the email. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[still doesn't understand]'' Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> I going to check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, check email. ''[Laughs]'' Yeah I'm sorry I tr- I tried to uh- understand but it just kind of messed up a little bit. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don- why don't you two speak in Spanish?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhh. I'm not exactly fluent. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ¿Sabes hablar español, Chris? (Do you know how to speak Spanish?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí, hablo español. (Yes, I speak Spanish)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Oh. ''[pause, one of the trolls says something to her]'' Oh, eso es muy sexy. (That is very sexy.)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Ohhhh. Te gusta. Te gusta muchísimo, (You like it. You like it a lot)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> La verdad, si. (To tell you the truth, yes)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Me amos mis amigas muchísimas. Sons muy bueñas! (I love my friends (feminine) a lot. They are very good.) [Correction: Amo a mis amigas muchísimo. Son muy buenas.] <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Oh, eso es tan cool en español! Muy bueno! (That's so cool in Spanish! Very good)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Muy bueño (very good)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Aha, exacto. (it is!)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]'' Okay, that's good. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Well, I going down, okay?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Okay, you're going down- by the way, let me ask ya Cassie, do you ever- you've uh- you've actually met uh Sarah May in person, haven't you? <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Not. She's on Internet.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Okay. That's cool- but anyway uh- you got- you d- you have my Wii number, uh- you can reply the email with your Wii number and it'll be registered on the Wii network. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[very haltingly]'' Yes. So. Cool. Talk with you Chris. You are so cool. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Heh. Uhhhh. You flatter me. Tú me flatteray. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[Weak laugh]'' Well, see you. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[In his 'baby voice']'' Adiós. ''[sigh]'' <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós, bebé.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós, chiquita bonita. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>[Pause as audio cuts out]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -it again. <br />
<br>[Another pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So anyway, Chris. I've been working on Rabbichoso for a day and uh- I was just wonderin' like, it's- it's supposed to compete with the Sonichu, you know? If you weren't aware of that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhhh. I grabbed onto d- grabbed onto g I- grabbed onto the... that gist. I'm aware- I'm aware of the gist of the theory. Uh. I'm aw- I'm aware that you're- that you're tryin' to compete. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know what competition does. It's drives uh- it drives consumer interest- Well that's why you know- It's great. You have to compete with high quality things. ''[muffled]''- that's why I'm trying to help. You know, compete. Just so you're aware of this, OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I see. -see. <br />
<br>[Pause]<br />
<br />
===Rabbichoso And Animu===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris we've been ge- been getting uh threatening images from the Pickle Man. Did you s- did you see the left? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I've not heard from the Pickle Man in lo- in a long time. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Apparently there are multiple ones because this one is, uh, not a darkie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh-huh. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> It's good that they're leaving you alone now. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Seems like they found more easier targets. Seeing as how you became [[Navy|saltier]].<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh. You know I originally got that line- quote from an e- ep- episode of ExCel Saga. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> From what?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> ExCel Saga.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Oh, ExCel Saga. Oh, yeah, that's a good anime.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> AIII I-Falazzo! (''He means [[ScotPalazzo|Il-Palazzo]]'')<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, have you ever seen two animes, ''[muffled]'' and Schooldays?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I have not seen either of those. I like Steel Angel Kurumi as well.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, how much Japanese do you know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only a little bit. I'm not totally fluent. I can say that with all honesty. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something unintelligible, not quite Japanese]''<!-- It sounds like he's saying "You say you can't- can you speak with me?" in CHINESE. --><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Huh?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Never mind, you won't understand it.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[unclear] Chris-Chan. Genki desu-ka?''<br />
<br />
===Chris Could Kill Clyde===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, I just wanted to say, uh, you're doing a good job, like, keeping calm even though Clyde is here. I mean u- I thought you'd be, like, more angry at him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm being calm with you guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> -I would have been choking him by now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I'd have kicked his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Preach to the choir. Pr- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I'd make him choke on a pickle if it were up to me.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You guys can't touch me otherwise I'd kick all your asses. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, bring it.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris could kick Clyde's ass anytime.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Let's see Chris do it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Bring it to me any day of the week and I'll definitely show him a hard- day's night. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah I think you could kick his ass.<br />
<br>[Trolls and Clyde talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Sings]'' -been a hard day's night...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -never mind, just...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean that as a- meant that as in I would beat... him up. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Kick his ass?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm very strong. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. I'm gonna see you later, OK?<br />
<br>''[Unison of goodbyes]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> OK see ya. Thank you so much Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[ignoring his fans]'' Yeah I can- I can lift about my weight. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Like um- if Clyde were right in front of you, what would you do to him?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Like, what kind of style of fighting do you have?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, shut up.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I gotta know my competition. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Personal- in the physical offense. ''[sigh]'' I would definitely be giving you so much physical pain. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's not a s- that's not a style. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I would beat you up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He deserves it man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, that's still not a style...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He uses fisticuffs. He's a gentleman. Gentleman fisticuffs. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Whatever, I'll just see-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Stop arguing and just-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ''[Over previous troll]'' I mean, if he did that to my sweetheart I'd fucking kill him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well. He's not- he's not going to come over and kill me, I know that. He doesn't have the money. [pause] You know I'm surprised that you're mad here. You're much kinder in person I thought you- Now I'm just expecting you at my door anytime, just waiting for you to stand here with an axe or something. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Knives are too messy. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Ah, now a sword- sword's are usually better.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What about poison?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Poison's good, poison's good.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde, what- do you want him to beat your ass?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I was just expecting it, you know.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, you know what's another thing? I would definitely not tell you how I would be hurting you, but I would definitely give you a who- big amount of pain. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, he's gonna keep you guessin'!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he deserves it. After everything he's done-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Muffled by troll]'' -going to kill me, I'd like to know. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I'm just going to let you cover in- worry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh so you're never going to show up, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Oh yes I will show up. But you just won't be expecting it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't even know where I live, do you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Find out!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Maybe I should give you my address. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, you should track him down and kick his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> But I'm going to leave you guessing too...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Defend Panda's h- Panda's honor.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, hi Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> 'sup Julie.<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br>''[Everyone talks over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde's A Dick===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I notice her mic doesn't work. But still I'm just letting her know that- acknowledge her presence. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're doing well staying calm even though Clyde's here.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, Clyde's a total dick.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Fucker.<br />
<br>''[Rustling]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I mean, he's taken over everything. The IRC. This. I can't- no one can stop him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' -over there, so...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll:'''</font> I- I like Rabbichoso.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Of course you do. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll''':</font> It's funny. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I will not offer any new comment on it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, OK. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, when can we expect the next Sonichu to be released.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, we've been eager.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It'll be soon. It will be soon.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah just ignore Clyde man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean if you're going to put a hard date on it, you'd better deliver your promise. If you don't, I'll strike harder. That's all I'm saying.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. You're saying if I don't set a date, you're gonna...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no. I'm saying don't make promises you can't keep. Don't make promises you can't keep.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He'll choke you with his medallion bitch!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who the hell do you think you are?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I agree with Cogs over there. Maybe you should do just a page a day, not release all at once. Keep his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you telling him this when he hates you?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm giving him suggestions man, OK? OK?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Only thing he's gonna suggest to you is 'shut the fuck up'!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, seriously man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It's alright. <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Penny Arcade's slow.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh you mean like Penny Arcade or ''[unclear]'' or MegaTokyo?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they're just like- boring. Then they because sellouts. <br />
<br />
===Chris's Country Cookin===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Chris, where's your favorite place to eat?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. Can't really say uh- but I like country cookin'. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> What's country cooking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh no G's in the sto- no G's in the name by the way, no G. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah what's country cooking? I'm not familiar with that.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's like uh- som- something like Golden Corral. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But Golden Corral is a national franchise.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh Chris, how are your parents?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> They're OK.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br>[Long pause]<br />
<br />
===Sex Is Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I've got a sug- another suggestion. Now be quiet all of you cause I know you hate me. Just- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, Chris hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well don't defend him. He can defend himself OK? He's a man. But whatever-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let him speak.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm suggesting that- you go on and on about this sex stuff but you've never gotten laid, have you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I like to put myself in the imaginative situation that I'd like to be in and the sexual stimulation. So I can be ready for [[ego|myself]] for when I do actually have my first time.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well my first time was- I'll just say that it's terrible, OK? I didn't know what I was doing, she didn't know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let me guess, you prematurely ejaculated?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no, it's not like that you don't know what to do. Every woman's told me OK? You can't prepare-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Clyde]'' First time's always awkward...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -I learnt that mistake a while back, OK whatever. OK, you just- you can't prepare for your first time. You might as well just have a really bad first time so you learn from your mistakes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm not trying to defend Clyde or anything, but yeah it's kinda true. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Hmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The girl I first fell in love with is the girl I'm married to right now. Samantha just changed my world. But marriage does get boring.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Tips To STAY STRAIGHT===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I know how you say how important it is to stay straight, um- I'm having trouble staying straight, do you have any suggestions?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Watch a bunch of pornography with uh- with naked women. OK, a lot of naked women.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That happened to me one time...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, I have this friend I play video games with, is that gay? He's male by the way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry could you- I'm sorry could you repeat that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I have this guy I'm friends with he always comes over to my house to play video games. Is that gay? I'm kinda scared. You know? I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Hmm. Is he making any advances towards you? Personally. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I dunno how to tell. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Like uh sit- does he always sit next to you when he's playing games. Playing video games.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Yeah he usually does. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I see. Hmm. My- well- my suggestion in that case, would be to keep a heavy distance between you and that guy. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he meant anything gay by it though. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he means anything like- gay about it. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well, still- it's always best to find out- you can ask him. Don't be afraid to ask him. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> What would you do in this situation?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well if he said yes then I would uh- basically- let me think about that a moment. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you have any friends who're are like, guys?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only acquaintances and only a few of them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you play video games with people or anything? Do they come over to your house?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. No.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I remember-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> ''[Cuts Polly off]'' I'm just worried I might be gay or something. I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You probably are Falsion, but that's OK. No, look dude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Leave him alone! Leave him alone! He's straight!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Why?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Hey, let's have a calm conversation here. Let's not have any fights.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br>''[Trolls speak over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I've been reading the Sonichu comics and man, they are page-turners! Seri- I was on- I was on the edge of my seat for a while. I ju- I couldn't- I couldn't- you know. Just had to read and read.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Thank you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, can I be your friend? I know I'm a guy. I don't mean anything gay by it. Can I be your friend? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. I dunno. <br />
<br />
===A Wild Snorlax Appears===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Do you want any hotdogs?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I'm OK. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> No?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I was talking with my mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I was wondering if I could be your friend.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I h- heard you only like, you only like to be acquaintances. With guys. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, ummm. Let's just pretty much leave it at acquaintance. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hello Mrs. Chandler. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> She can't hear you, I'm wearing my earphones.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Listen, I'm not gay. I don't- you know- yeah. Never mind.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I mean- I mea- I-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What do you have against gay people? I'm serious to hear this. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's just unnatural and it's against God's will. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, it's not like it's a choice. You can't change who you are like- you're a creative guy but I mean they're just gay. They can't change that. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm just answering a few questions mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You don't have to answer. Nobody's payin' you to do that.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yes they are.<br />
<br>''[shuffling sounds, clanging]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> It ain't none of their business no-way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I wouldn't be asked questions like that by employers or anybody. Don't tell people what you d- what you think. Keep that to yourself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris what's hap- what's happening?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, obviously, my mother is offering her input.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Tell her you're just talking to some friends. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' I don't need no back talk from somebody on the other end of the phone.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear you, Mom. Hmm. Hmm. <br />
<br>''[scraping sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> These- these idiots don't have any brains or- they don't have any idea this way or that.<br />
<br>''[more banging, clanging and tumbling sounds. Sounds like washing up]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Is right now a bad time right now? I mean-<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Pixelblocks, Pixelblocks!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Someone's saying "Pixelblocks." <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you saying [[Pixelblocks]]?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>''[Chris's mom has been singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful singing voice, Chris.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[Audio cuts back in]'' -all the anxiety, causing you stress.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, well sometimes they don't; they can be peaceful.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Well, your mom and dad get the crappy end of the stick.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm, a lot of us do.<br />
<br>''[more clattering sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Yeah, just like this nasty mess over here that you guys left that I got to clean up.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm. ''[Audio cuts]'' -Yeah, I took care of my bills. I mean, not completely, but I took care of them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> What about going to, uh, Redmond?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> We! (Wii?) <br />
<br>[unintelligible, windows beeps]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[laughing]'' Yeah, sweetheart pool.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Mmhmm. ''[laughing]'' Like the other side of the pillow.<br />
<br>''[someone sighing. Clanging noises return after short absence]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' ...is all, I mean, living with your parents is okay bad-in today's bad economy, but at 26, come on. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Shut up, you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I'm being nice.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde isn't so bad a guy. He does bad things, but he's pretty cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah he's reformed. He's seen the error- Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How- how could he do that to Sarah? I mean- That's not right.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah. Well, that's like Luke... That's like Luke and Laura from General Hospital. I know that's like, before y'all's time, but, um... Luke was a rapist and she-he raped Laura and then, like, a few months later they get married. So... ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, I believe Clyde was trying to make amends from his past actions.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, but Chris, can you uh- can you forgive him?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Random Troll:'''</font> ''[whispering]'' White whale, holy grail! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Can you forgive a small-dicked Asian? Just a thought.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He's not Asian! <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm half-Asian, okay? My parents ''[unclear]'' I don't really wanna go into it. It's too bo-boring for you people. But this is why I ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you there? Just makin' sure, buddy.<br />
<br>''[clattering]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Move out.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Another Troll''':</font> Well, how do I do that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi there, my kitty. ''[In baby voice]'' Yes, there's a pretty kitty.<br />
<br>''[Someone speaking with a voice-synth]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hang on a second. I've got, like, a thousand different... Oh, Crass, why'd you do that?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Because. You can unban him but, yeah. I'm not gonna friggin' stand for that. <br />
<br>''[Sound of a vacuum cleaner]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> I (m j d?) do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I heard the "g" word.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um, is that a vacuum cleaner?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Yeah, sounds like it is.<br />
<br>[Trolls speak but are drowned out by vacuum]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ...room or something.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I think the vacuum cleaner... <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If that's the government trying to do some kind of thing, then my name's Rusty Shackleford.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's a loud fan.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I have a fan above my stove, too.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Hey... I do, too.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Wait- wha- wait. You-you-you're in the kitchen? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Me too.<br />
<br>''[possibly Sonic game sound effects]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmhm? Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I'm pretty sure it's already asked, but I didn't catch the answer. When can we expect the next Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I-I-I told you my suggestion of releasing a page a day or something. I mean, it's a pretty good one. It-it-it allows for a good time. Finish a page a day. You upload it. You know? It's very good. Works very well.<br />
<br>''[Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh. I mean- you guys keep asking when he's going to finish it but I wonder how many pages are going to be in the new one? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> The last one was like, thirty. Just release it over the span of a month. Works fine. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...go up to ninety thousand...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[mutters something]''<br />
<br>''[Sound of Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Down by the river...side.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful voice, Chris.<br />
<br>''[clattering, typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[unclear, repeating the same two phrases]'' Gone down by the river, down by the water side, down by the riverside. Down by the waterside. Down by the riverside.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember ''[unclear]''<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -I'm hungry myself.<br />
<br>''[some kind of alarm sounding]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Then go eat.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I already ate.<br />
<br />
===Anime And Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I wonder what anime Chris watches nowadays. There's not many on television but do you still watch Japanese cartoons? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[In a bad accent]'' Kawaii desu ne. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I want to watch Shuffle. He said it was very good. He said it was sad. I don't know if I wanna watch- I don't like sad stuff. I like to be happy when I watch anime.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, and um, do you watch stuff like Bleach and um Code Geass or Naruto or something?<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I'm glad to hear that Shuffle isn't sad. I'm definitely going to watch it sometime.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um, yeah Chris that was a good call on Naruto. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah there's a lot of people who don't like it much either. Too popular.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But please. Please. Hope. ''[audio cuts out briefly]'' Uh, Chris, please consider When They Cry.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Ooh, I saw that one. It was a really good series.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, I know; that was good, like- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah. Both seasons of it. <br />
<br>''[Windows beeps, voices overlapping]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I could link you to Season One if you want. Yeah, Samantha got me into that. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...you'll give it a try, Chris. It's a very, very good series.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Hm. Hey, Julie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...lots of ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Watch Shuffle. You got the six episodes of Shuffle or... Which o- which anime? I'm sorry. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh and JoJo's Bizarre Adventure is also cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I really liked JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. Very ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Za warudo!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah, I think Shuffle is quite all right. I like Heidi. She's sweet and loyal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> That's a good one. One of my favorites is Black Lagoon.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris have you ever seen La Blue Girl?<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other about different anime]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, uh, Chris can I, my, uh, I don't know if it's all right, but, like, could you like, give me an email sometime? I could, uh... recommend you to... this anime that... Polly and... Julie like to watch. They're quite- they... Oh, C-and Cogs has recommended such great anime. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[talking to his mother]'' Yeah? That's ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> As well as Julie-Julie's the person that got me into anime.<br />
<br />
===People Love Poketunes===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> -we can go into this later cause I got my headphones on. And, Mom, you know what something else? They liked your singing.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> What? I don't sing.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> That's my laugh; that's my laugh. They couldn't hear me. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They heard you. Singin'. Just now.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I can't sing!<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I'm tone deaf. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They just heard you singing, and liked your voice.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay. Did you write checks for all those bills and pack everything ''[unclear]''?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yes, Mother, I did.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You're not telling me no story?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm not telling you no story.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> OK. It's important [''inaudible''] did you pay them?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, I paid that one. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay, you have to be honest with me, 'cause, see, you're settin'...<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm being honest, I'm being honest.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> How you respond to what [we] talk about. You say you ought to something and you don't do it then that's gonna change my ideas ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay... I'll be sure to pay the remaining differences next month.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> No, this month.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I know but I couldn't pay them all with 90 dollars so there's still some left ''[sound cuts]'' ...oh, you're cooking them up here, okay, that's why you turned the fan on over the stove.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br>''[Trolls rejoice and mock Momma Chandler]''<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 1|Mumble Chat 1]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 3|Mumble Chat 3]]|}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Spanish]]<br />
==Links==<br />
*[https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBOVVDS0JtSDNvMWs Download]<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_2&diff=162998Mumble 22012-09-26T20:50:13Z<p>Irisviel: /* Chris Types Fast (And Hates Hex-Box) */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{Articleofthenow}}<br />
[[Image:0839-MomDesi.JPG|thumb|right|180px|In Mumble 2, a Wild [[Barbara Chandler|Snorlax]] appeared.]]<br />
<br />
'''Mumble 2''' is the second [[Mumble]] chat that took place on 4 [[February 2009]]. More than an hour long.<br />
<br />
This is a more organized Q&A type chat than [[Mumble 1]]. Questions from [[Clyde]] about [[sex]] in the [[comic]] and interesting tidbits about how Chris believes sex is the same as romance. This is pretty hard hitting, with stuff like how Chris is into [[McDonald's|fast food]] yet he's against tobacco. A lot of drama involving Clyde.<br />
<br />
Length: '''1:49:17'''<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
<br />
===Notes===<br />
* Chris doesn't like Clyde because he stole his sweetheart.<br />
* Audio cuts out for a minute before Chris says: "...HYMEN!" (You broke her hymen)<br />
* Trolls claim [[Panda]] is with Clyde, Chris wants to hear her voice, they say she's busy<br />
* 'She and I WERE very close'<br />
* Chris didn't have $400-$800 to go and see Panda; claims he got this number from an airport website recommended by [[Miyamoto]]<br />
* Insists on [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] being in ''[[Animal Crossing]]''<br />
* Doesn't want to talk about his deal with them<br />
* Insists that he doesn't have to turn down his radio since his voice is louder (''it is horribly loud in the mic'')<br />
* Panda gave Clyde all of the sites, etc.<br />
* [[Sarah]] is going to be with Clyde, which Chris wants to deny<br />
* These motherfuckers keep talking over each other<br />
* Calls a troll's critique crap<br />
* [[Bubbles]] must be aroused, she isn't wet all the time<br />
* Bubbles is 90% water so does sperm just swim around forever? NO<br />
* Clyde: This is a children's comic, why so much sex?<br />
: '''Chris:''' It is romance. My best artwork is when they're making out 'romantic moments', drawn in protest to trolls. Shows that [[Rosechu]]s have vaginas, not [[duck]]s.<br />
* Admits to maybe going overboard<br />
* Trolls try to reason with him about the [[ED]] article: There wouldn't be an article if he didn't react like he does.<br />
* Trolls say that TV-Y7 means NO SEX but Chris points to romantic anime that have making out (cartoons are for kids, whatever the content).<br />
* Trolls talk about Japan being less strict about those things<br />
* Everyone gets to vote in [[CWCville]], even if they're [[Niggos|black]].<br />
* Got his idea from [[Mary Poppins]].<br />
* Troll tries to give historical background about cough medicine putting kids to sleep. Chris insists it was the lullaby that put them to sleep.<br />
* Discussion about Chris, 'gay message' sent by a troll<br />
* He calls Clyde a scoundrel<br />
* BELIEVE HIM HE IS STRAIGHT<br />
* Chris tries to speak Mexican at 20:50<br />
* Mexican speaks Mexican to him... he replies in Menglish<br />
* [[4-cent_garbage]] is located in Mexico<br />
* Someone says that he needs to improve his Mexican<br />
* Chris is against smoking, CWCville is smoke and alcohol free<br />
* Rehash of why [[tobacky]] is bad, his position on it, alcohol=bar fights<br />
* Chris's dad smoked and had several bypasses, has a pacemaker and has had heart attacks<br />
* Mention of his hair cuttings for his fans<br />
* Chris was doing math in his head, got in car crash.<br />
* Chris has taken college level math. Took trigonometry.<br />
* Trolls gang up on Clyde for stealing Panda<br />
* Time will tell when Chris will make the money he would have in the Nintendo deal<br />
* Trolls bash Clyde for his pot smoking <br />
* Chris doesn't watch news because it's bad news =(<br />
* Bashing of the Mexican<br />
* Chris can type 30 to 100 WPM, but can't type and talk at the same time<br />
* Chris says [[PSN]] is free though Clyde(?) points to the $1,000 Chris spent on PSN<br />
* Chris has been typing for 15 minutes now and it is VERY loud<br />
* Chris has been busy IRL therefore the comic release doesn't have a date<br />
* Someone points to nudes on [[YouTube]].<br />
* He does not have it on the YouTube, but he isn't going to take it anymore.<br />
* Claims some of the photos are photoshopped.<br />
* Clyde offers help to take ED page down.<br />
* Chris denies taking those pictures, doesn't want to talk about it, making him uncomfortable.<br />
* Some of the pictures are real. When questioned which ones are fake, Chris can't answer.<br />
* Chris hates Harry Potter because it was in competition with [[Pokémon]]!<br />
* Chris is too stressed to read Vivian's [[A Girl Who Brought Down the World|book]], but he likes the cover!<br />
* Polly, who has been talking the whole time is confronted by Chris who thinks she is a guy. Polly is upset. Chris apologizes.<br />
* [[Jimmy Hill]] has launched his Sonichu show<br />
* More Mexican talk at 55:10<br />
* Chris giggles and sighs happily when Cassie, another Mexican, compliments him and when she leaves he says 'Chiquita Bonita'<br />
* Rabbichoso talk (Sonichu.info)<br />
* Classic trolls are leaving Chris alone.<br />
* Chris likes Steel Angel Kurumi (''quote from [[Wikipedia:Steel Angel Kurumi|Wikipedia]]: often classified as ecchi due to the focus on fanservice and panty shots'')<br />
* Chris claims to be very strong, could beat Clyde up. Says he would show Clyde a [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force|Hard Day's Night]], and would give Clyde pain.<br />
* ShinyMarshtomp makes an appearance? Likes Rabbichoso<br />
* Chris likes to eat at [[Country Cookin]] (''like Golden Corral'')<br />
* Chris likes to imagine his first time. <br />
* Clyde says the first time is awful, Chris said it was because Clyde prematurely ejaculated<br />
* Watch porn with naked women to cure your gay<br />
* Guys sitting next to you = gay coming on to you<br />
* Falsion has been in the chat room and is afraid he is gay<br />
* A wild Snorlax appears<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
<br />
===Waiting for Chris===<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I can't wait to hear Chris! I'm a huge fan!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, goddamn these noodles are fantastic. Man, I wish I could eat like this everyday.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Have you eaten the rice balls?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no. These are noodles. These are-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Fan-fucking-tastic.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now they're all gone, it's fantastic, you know?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Sweetangie is Chris. Or, we think so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's definitely not the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm disappointed there's so many impostors out there. Kinda my fault, but, you know, if it weren't- ''[unintelligible]'' -hard to come by.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His mic was working last time he was here, just fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He usually capitalizes his words, like in every sentence.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is- I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Is it set to push to talk or something?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You better get us your email address Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah its push to talk. It's called push to talk. It's fantastic ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, just have him set it to voice activity. It works so much better that way.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Aww, he left.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> You guys are fucking idiots.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other again]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You guys scared him off by being guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, you fucking jackasses. Nice going.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Was that even the real...?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yes, that was the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He's too much of a pussy to talk.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, cause you scared him, or some- No, or he's too stupid to be.<br />
<br>''[Trolls Laugh]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Arrives===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Chris arrives, with radio playing loudly]'' Hello.<br />
<br>''[Trolls all greet him]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, now-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Why haven't you got your microphone working?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't know why my microphone [is] messed up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry, but we had an impostor here before.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm registered. I've got myself registered now. So, uh, hopefully-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> That's probably why. It had to like, uh- calibrate.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Well, I'm calibrated now.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So, Chris, have you seen Rabbichoso, it's fantastic.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't give a crap about your stupid pencil sketch.<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am not listening. I do not have to listen to ''you''.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Why, I'm not understanding [inaudible]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well for one thing,and I'll say it on here, you stole my sweetheart!<br />
<br>''[Cutout continues]''<br />
<br />
===PandaHalo, Trip to Redmond and Animal Crossing===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You broke her hymen!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I know it's a terrible mistake, but I plan to make it up to her. I'm getting married and uh- I'm doing the things I should do.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh and another thing, if she is really over there with you now, then put her on the mic. Please.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> She's not- He never said-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, Chris, she's very busy, OK. She's very busy.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's not over here right now. Okay? So lets drop it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, fine. Well could you tell her to please send me a message lettin' me know, for sure, so I can know- so I can know to-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' I'll let her know whatever you want, but it's her life. She doesn't have to send you a message. You failed her. You failed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' She and I were very close.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If you we're so close, then why didn't you go?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' Because I had- Aw, hang on a second. How do I- oh, that's right. This thing. Right. Mmm. Hold on a sec. Oh yeah, because I did not have four to eight hundred dollars!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It doesn't cost that much to go cross-country man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes it does. I know, I saw it on an airport website. Where I was be- Where I was- recommended to me by Mr. Miyamoto.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, you can drive there. It's not that hard.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened with that? I thought, um, didn't you have a deal with them or something? I heard a rumor that your characters were going to be in Animal Crossing.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, they are in Animal Crossing. And I did- and I do- I did have a deal with them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened though?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' I'd rather not say.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Radio, Clyde and Criticism===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, why don't you turn down the TV? It's hard to hear you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Annoyed sigh]'' I do not have a TV turned on in here.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I can hear it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have a radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I hear something in the background.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Burping throughout sentence]'' Well that's the- that would b- the radio. And it is not that loud.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But it shows up pretty well on your microphone mic. With due respect.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But still, my voice is louder than the radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Ah goo- ahh given.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh, Chris? Uh, when are you going to do the new Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something over Polly]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' Uh, I'll answer Polly's question. I'm not sure. It's, uh, it's in progress right now, I'm drawing it up.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I can't wait to read it!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Well, we'll see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Listen, Clyde kind of has admin on here, so we can't really do anything about him. So, yeah. I don't know.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Hard to hear over Chris's radio]'' ...with you guys. I love you guys. Just as much as Chris loves you guys. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I was angry. I was angry. But I'm calm now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't try to hurt any other person from now on.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm doing the best I can. I'm doing the best I can.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have much- I do not have much to say in response to that right now. Because I'm ticked off.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't let him get to you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're no better than he is, if you give in.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris, I just wanted to let you know I'm a huge fan of the comics, and I'm glad you keep doing what you're doing. You're doing a great job, and just keep it up, alright man?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, yeah, I appreciate the, uh, what's the word I'm looking for? The, the, uh- well, the encouraging words. Encouragement. I appreciate the encouragement. Well, there are things, uh- I- er- current events I do not appreciate. I appreciate the positive encouragement.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I can't really do anything. He took over the IRC channel. I used to be the owner. I mean Clyde. He's like taking over everything.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, it was because Panda gave it to me, you know. But anyway, I mean, you can't just listen to encouragement, you've got to listen to criticism, man. Criticisms are what make you better, you learn from your mistakes. You learn from mistakes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Be right back guys, my wife is calling.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I don't- I don't- Tons of people don't like the Rabbichoso art style, but you know, I gotta improve on that. That's something I plan to improve on. There's a lot of criticism in the death of Sonichu, right? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What? What did you just say?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a lot of criticism of Sonichu. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. For a moment there I thought you said something different.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What, what did you think I said? I'm just saying, there are people who like it and people who don't like it. You gotta start taking in those suggestions. You know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. So many things that will be improved upon. But, I just have to hear from Sarah herself that she really is going to be with you, Clyde. I have to hear it from herself. It's one thing to hear it from you and then it's- then on that note, it's just I find it very hard to believe. So I have to hear it from her.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I kinda think that Rabbichoso sucks. I mean, I think it could be funny, but it honestly looks like it's drawn by a kindergartner.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, Sonichu has evolved over the years. You can see that the art's getting better. Rabbichoso doesn't even look like something a beginner would do, honestly. I mean, ''[Interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A whole bunch of crap!<br />
<br>''[Everyone starts talking at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, Sonichu is in color.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I know, I accept his criticism. But you just called it crap! Now that's just rude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have emotions going behind me- uh, behind that opinion.<br />
<br />
===Cassie===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, did you get my message.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Aren't you going to be the gentleman, then? Aren't you gonna be the gentleman?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I just want to ask you, Chris. I'm Cassie's friend. She- she's worried sick about you. Why haven't you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did email her! As a- I- I haven't gotten any re-plies from her. I have emailed her and I have instant messaged her on A.I.M. and Skype. I haven't heard back from her. I don't know what's going on there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> ...you emailed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> When was the last time you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, hang on, I'll check.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris? I have a question. My fa- One of my favorite new characters is, um, Simonla, and like, I also like Zapina as well. Um, are they gonna have bigger parts in the series later on?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, could you repeat that question?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I was wondering if Simonla and Zapina will either have bigger parts in the series later on. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [[Sonichu_10#The_Final_Countdown|Possibly]]. Possibly, but, uh, I can't say for sure. Oh, and, uh, to answer your question, uh- in answer to, uh, I believe, uh, Screwhead, who asked? It was about four days ago. About four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Yeah. Four days ago? Okay, I'll tell her to check it out.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> The last email I sent was about four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> She'll contact you in a while, though.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I'll tell her to check it out and- and thanks Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright. Mm.<br />
<br />
===Bubbles's Pussy and Sex in the Comics===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris? I have a question.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, my favorite character is Bubbles, I kinda liked the, uh, the thing she had going with Blake, where she was kind of keeping the relationship secret. I thought that was kinda clever. I was wondering, uh, she's a water-type, so does that mean that her vagina is always wet, or does she have to be aroused like a normal woman?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, aroused. That's applied for all the, uh, Rosechus there. And also, like, you know, she's not just a water-type, she's also- she's a water- and electric-type, like uh- oh, shoot- What's the name of that one? Originated from Gold-Silver-Crystal series, uh, evolves from Chinchou? Lanturn. And she has, uh, she has Volt Absorb ability.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, Chris, another question following Bubbles. Uh, her body is 90% water, and now this thing about the whole sexual intercourse- about it. Now, don't take this rude, and you don't need to answer me... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...I totally respect your creative work. My wife actually got me into this, uh, show actually. So, what happens is- like, as you know, like, semens are like little fishes in themselves. Would that mean, I mean, would they actually have a route to fly into the egg, in theory, or do they just swim around her whole body, just forever just swimming around.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. The, uh, the internal or- the internal organs uh, for the Rosechus are pretty much the same thing, so I'd say pre- about, uh, as good chance as most any other mammal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, so you mean she's able to control her density a little bit more. She- I understand now. She's able to control more her density from the 90% water. Okay. That pretty much answers it just perfectly. That's been bothering me at work. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I got another question, Chris, about this whole sexual thing. I mean, this is a children's comic, right? Why is there so much sex in it?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. It's called romance, and my- and my- if you'll notice throughout the comics my best pieces of artwork among which were those where dey were kissing and making out. Romantic moments.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a hidden page-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' And because- and because- and because of the tension from, uh, the trolls and Encyclopedia Dramatica, I just felt like doing that in protest against them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, but childre-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' Yes but how is that really a protest? That, you know, you know, are, are you like referencing to the 60's when women burned their bras? That was in protes- That was feminism. Saying that they weren't slaves to men. Do you even understand the whole thing?<br />
<br>''[Multiple voices are heard at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Now, to tell you the truth, I never really thought about, I never really thought about that when I-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Chris]'' Then how is, stripping was, how was that protest-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Jack]'' It shows that they have vaginas and NOT dicks. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well you know the dick thing was the fact that they were just, you know, mocking you. I think you went overboard with that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well maybe I did. Maybe I did. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, you did, because that seems kind of excessive, kind of-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' I don't think they would have even bothered to write about an article about you if you didn't just keep reacting like that.<br />
<br />
===Chris justifies sex in a kids' comic===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I have another question.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The point some of us are trying to make is, if it's TV-Y7 that means there should really be no sex in it at all.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible over other people]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's pretty much incorrect, I mean, uh, there's so many romantic anime that's TV-Y7, and they shoul- they have making out.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, a lot of things in Japan, Japan has stricter standards-not stricter, I mean looser guidelines than America. It's much different.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear ya.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I was just wondering what Bubbles, um, she has a, that water whirlwind attack, I was just curious if you had any plans to make- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Butting in]'' By the way, that was a Whirl- Whirlpool.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font>Yeah, Whirlpool, sorry, sorry, Whirlpool, but do you have any plans to mix an, uh, Electric-type attack with that, since water conducts electricity, right? It could be a very powerful-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah, she did, she did an electric attack amongst the- the walls of that Whirlpool and she let out. In case you didn't know, there's a- little bits of lightning bolts among which-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, oh, I'm sor- I didn't notice that, I'm sorry, I'll go take another look. Thank you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hey Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> You make some pretty sweet Little Big Planet levels.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you.<br />
<br />
===Chris on Benadryl babysitting===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, there's a message from Cogs on the side, it's about, uh, do women not have the right to vote already in CWCville.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, evry- Everybody, no matter what age, no matter what gender or race, everybody has the right to vote in CWCville. Even if they're black.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Then what's up with the "Votes for Women" thing, I was-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Not just vote women, but- ''[interrupted]'' any other ethnicities, and gays?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't understand-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did that- heard it in Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What? Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, man, Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, yeah, that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's a classic. It's my favorite movie of all time.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that movie was, like, based in the 1900s.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but still I- still I agreed with that message there-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Taken out of context, that makes it seem like CWCville's set in the 1960s.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What message? That children should be given cough medicine so they'll go to sleep?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''What?''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that's what women used to do back in- That's what mothers, friggin' nurses and stuff used to do to kids in the 1900s, is give children, like, you know, cough medicine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Cause- cause the medicine- uh, correction, the medicine did not put them to sleep, there was a lullaby, not the cough medicine. They only had to take the cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ...because it rained, before dere, and it was not, and it was to, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Rain means cough medicine doesn't have anything to do with each other. That's not how friggin' germs are spread, or colds are gotten. Colds are gotten through germs, not the rain.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How is cough medicine any different from today's parents that just let their kids watch TV until they fall asleep? I mean, it's just as bad.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well- Cough medicine has a lot to do with the psychological effects of it. Obviously if you get- if you keep giving fre-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Thanks, Samantha, that was delicious.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's my, uh, Samantha-<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, that's we're all saying, cause I've heard that there's a lot of different chemicals in cough medicine. You could pick up a ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I don't even take cough medicine, because I'm not a pussy.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Anyway, I never put any references, I never did any references or plan any references to cough medicine or anything of that sort.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Well, Chris, Cassie says the last e-mail she got from you was on the 17th. How 'bout your being gay? Is that true?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[sigh]'' That wa- That was somebody had- That was Clyde hacking through my e-mail and spammed that to my contacts.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, I definitely did not do that-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You're a scoundrel-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -a slanderous lie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I did not do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Whoa-whoa-whoa. Wow. Well, thanks for that. She was worried that you were- that you don't like her.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> You're a scoundrel, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't do that. That was someone else.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I was wondering, because I've heard other news too, I was really hoping that you weren't gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Believe me, I'm straight.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I'll take your word for it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you. And, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Cogs- Cogs got a way- she showed us that, okay? I mean, you only ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br />
===Chris's fail-riffic Spanish===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So, Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, Screwhead's from Mexico. I heard you like Spanish, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hola, Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You know Spanish, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí. Conoso Mexico. Tomé dos años ''[unclear]'' mi escuela secundaria. (Yes, I know Mexico. I took two years [in, possibly] my secondary school.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has venido en Mexico? (Have you come to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, lo siento? (Uh, I'm sorry?)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has estado en Mexico? (Have you been to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Estoy Mexico? No. (I am Mexico? No.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[slowly]'' Has estado, um, in Mexico. Has venir? (Have you been to Mexico? Have gone?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Uh, no, I hav- no, no tengo pansars. ''[sic]'' (no, I don't have pansars (?))<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I think, uh, I think I meant to say- I'm pretty sure-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Did you just say you don't wear pants?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, no, I was trying to say, ah, I don't have plans to go in Mexico at the moment.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's what I understood what he was saying there.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, did you know that, that 4-cent garbage website is located in Mexico?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> That's why-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, that's why they can't get it shut down.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]'' borders, plus it's cheaper to run sites over there; they have, like, several servers.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wanted to talk to you, but she couldn't make it here, well, and, she wants to be your Spanish teacher, because she says that you've got room to improve your Spanish.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Oh, that Cassie. Yeah, I'm sorry, I thought you were- I got mixed up. Um... Yeah, um, I'm sorry, I, uh, I haven't talked to that- I haven't talked to Cassie in a while, but I've been mostly talking to, uh, her gal- her, uh, gal-pal and I'm sure- I'm sure she'd tell you a lot about her...<br />
<br />
===In which the trolls discuss bar fights===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey Chris, how- how does Sonichu keep Rosechu from spending more than a hundred dollars at the mall? I've always wondered how he could manage to do that. I've always had problems with that myself.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That wa- That time at the mall, it was, uh, Kel loaned the credit card. And it's like, yeah- she gave- she gave Sonichu the responsibility of that credit card. She did.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I've always given my advice on cannabis, you should do the ''[unintelligible]'', Cogs Chris, but I think she wants your response.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, one of my friends sent me this picture, and I think you might find it kinda disturbing just because they say it's proof that you're gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Aw yeah, I saw that, that's just a crappy Photoshop.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No, that one doesn't- this one doesn't look Photoshopped at all.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'm not gonna look at it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Oh, you're not? Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, uh, you say you're against smoking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. As a matter of fact, CWCville is a smoke-free, non-alcoholic city.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[partially drowned out]'' That's what we call a totalitarian state...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, and, uh, in the pilot episode with Seth MacFarlane, of, you know, Family Guy? He's always smoking. What do you think about that?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Go smoke.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I just- I just take that with a grain of salt, and, uh, you know, that's what-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, if he can smoke, why can't anyone else? I mean, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Because it causes cancer!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> So does a lot of things.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> It could be a prop pipe.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> In any case, I'm not- in any, in any case I've never done it and I never will.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, but eating too much fast food can give you a heart attack. I mean... so many things are deadly for you.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What about fast food, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> My father used to smoke and he went through a whole bunch of heart attacks. He suffered three- <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Well, I think that might have to do more with his weight.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He suffered through three or four triple bypasses.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I think that's... that's more like a weight issue.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He has a pacemaker!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, eh...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey ya guys, leave him alone. Ya know, my granddad, he smoked most of his life. He quit for 25 years and still died of lung cancer. I mean that's just the way it is. And your body never gets rid of it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, what about ''[pause]'' Chris, what about fast food? That's- that's bad for you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey Chris. Chris, could you do me a favor and send an email to Cassie? She's very worried about you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Yeah sure, I'll send her an email later.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, thanks.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, I've got uh, a certain someone you know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No no.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -she has to, uh, she wants to ask you w- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Also, she said something about some hair.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh yeah. Yeah, that's uh... that's another issue right there. Um, hmmm. I'll talk to her about that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, does, uh, drinking cause cancer?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, but it causes liver dysfunction and likely bar fights and automobile accidents.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, bar fights, but— <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Bar fights!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> -but I don't think that bar fights are that big of a problem.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I think bar fights are awesome.<br />
<br>''[People agree bar fights are awesome]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> But bar fights are bad. I got into a bar fight once and one of my hands got cut and two fingers from my left hand. Bar fights suck.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well, I think that might be more because you're Mexican. Are you sure you didn't lose them picking bo- picking grapes and- or something?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> No, Mexican people are more more- more much macho man; we get into bigger fights. We're more awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No- I think it might be because you got your hands stuck in some machinery when you were out picking in the vineyards.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't know about you guys, but I like- I like having bar fights.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Crashes Due To Math===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't have to be drunk to be in a bar fight or in an automobile accident, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but they increase the likeliness of it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You've been in an autobile— automobile accident, I mean, were you drunk?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I was distracted.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Uh, by what? I mean, it's kinda hard to be dist— you gotta be focused on driving man-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I was doing math in my head.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, math in your— <br />
<br>[Trolls talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> My mind got distracted by being its own calculator.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Are you good at math?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, is that for school?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Are you some kind of savant?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's impossible.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Guys, you're getting ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you like a mathematic genius or something?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> You know some artist people have like superpowers in their head. They can do like geniuses and add really well. ''[interrupted briefly by Jack saying something else about savant]'' Chris you are already an artist. Do you have any like, magical powers?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, I heard autistic people are really good at math. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Well not all the stereo- some of that sounds like stereotypes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[talking over Chris]'' ...it has to do with mental ability; I mean, what's the...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean I don't know- I mean I'm not saying that I'm a total genius. I mean I know- I know enough to get by.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What's the highest level of math you've taken Chris?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> College level.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I mean like algebra, or calculus or...?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. I believe I just did trigonometry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Very impressive.<br />
<br>[long pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So I was wondering. When did you get the CAD degree? I figured it's like a fine arts degree or something? I mean wha-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I designed a whole- I designed buildings and machinery and such along there. I designed the whole CWCVille shopping center.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don't you have a job then?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Your fans would love to see that Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' -I mean use that to design like, actual buildings? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I think I just told you I designed the CWCVille sho-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I don't mean in your comic. I'm just saying-<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde Isn't Popular And Chris Should Program===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well it's a good st-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So I heard you got some nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'll be putting an update on da YouTube soon, but not right now. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking maybe you could like, you know, get a degree in game design and make the Sonichu game? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah man, it's not that hard to learn programming. C++ man.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">''Falsion:'''</font> Clyde, he hates you, why are you talking?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm just giving him some advice, I mean C++ is-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you here? We don't like you. You totally ruined Chris's life.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't ruin his life. He ruined his own life.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yes you did. You've ruined his life. You raped his girlfriend. <br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks at once over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If he was the man he said he was, he'd have gone to Nintendo, made all that money. How- how are you going to make money now Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Time will tell.<br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks again]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, time will tell Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font>''[unclear]'' -need a plan, you know? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking uh, if- uh- would you be interested in getting a degree in game design. Making the game or something? Like if you had to? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Maybe but uh- I still have things to sort out in my real life.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah it's kinda unfortunate what happened with the Nintendo thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah- hang on a second, I'll be right back. Mm- ''[clattering]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So be honest guys am I really that much of a bother. I mean...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah you kind of are.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like a total dickfart.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You realize weed causes cancer? <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I didn't know that. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> And it causes the munchies. You're gonna get fat, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's okay, man, because I work out.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Do you play Guitar Hero standing up?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I play Guitar Hero while on the treadmill. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Will the Sonichu game be a- ''[muffled]'' -or a Wii one?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> It be a Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Wii would like to play. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh. I only got a DS. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I heard you are very good at HTML. Why don't you make a HTML Sonichu game? That would be awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't think you can make a game in HTML.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A- anyway I came back...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hey, Chris? How many courses did you have to take to get that degree in CAD? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -pretty sure you can make a game in HTML-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[speaking over]'' I'm took abo- took about two- took about two years to four years. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, if you can write HTML you can write C++, make your own games. Pretty simple man. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well it's something I'll consider. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde why are you talking to him? He hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm trying to give him some suggestions. I'm not insulting him, OK? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> HTML seems kinda outdated, so to speak. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font>I learn- I took two HTML classes so at least I know how to do- at least I know the ins and outs when it comes to like, workin' on it in the raw data- in the notepad.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> So you don't use Dreamweaver?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I also use Net- also use Netscape composer. <br />
<br>''[Someone starts singing 'Dreamweaver']''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I heard they went bankrupt or something.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't- I don- I don't listen to news because I don't care about bad news. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But that's not bad news that's just safety...<br />
<br>''[Talking over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why you gotta bring this bad vibe in here? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> OK OK I'll chill, I'm sorry it's just my wife- ''[can't hear over Chris typing extremely loud]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris you don't hear about these ones in a while. Like yesterday some guy in my town got run over by a train and he- he died. And that's a really bad thing, you know but you have to hear about it. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yeah but that's because you're Mexican. You Mexicans always play around the train tracks, what's with you? <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No come on, don't be racist.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> It's because Mexicans are stupid. I'm surprised I can use a computer. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' CrassCrab why do you have to be so mean?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> 'Cause my mother was raped by a Mexican. And I'm part Me- ''[muffled]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry man.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> That isn't fair to take it out on every other Mexican out there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His rule applied to millions. Just ignore him.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No I'm not my mother was raped by Mexicans.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> CrassCrab I'm tired of listening to you, get out of here. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Not all Mexicans are like that we- we- I am a nice Mexican guy. Not all Mexican guys are- ''[drowned out by typing]'' -Black guys are the people you should fear.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't get me started on them. But that will be another day. Cause I'm sick of hearing bad news.<br />
<br />
===Chris Types Fast (And Hates Hex-Box)===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris what are you uh- typing there?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm typing a email. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> How many words can you type? How fast can you type? Sounding fast there. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhh say about uh- sorta between thirty and a hundred. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's quite a good range man. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like "The Flash", minus the red jump-suit.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh Chris um- I was wondering if- ''[unclear]'' -game with Nintendo, would it be uh a Wii game or a DS game or both. I only own DS and I don't have any money for a Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[overlapping]'' Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wii, DS and Pla- hopefully uh- possibly uh, PlayStation 2 or 3. Never on [[Hex_Box|Hex-Box]]. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> When you gonna do this shit?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Why don't you like the Hex-Box? I mean I have an Xbox, I would love to play online with you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'd like to say this. Before Chris says anything about that I just wanna say that today my wife came home from the mall shopping for her usual clothes, that Gucci purse I had to buy for her. You know what she came home with? I wanted a PS3 but you know what she gave me was a frickin' Xbox 360. The Elite one? ''[someone speaks over]'' I know, I kept telling her like "Honey this isn't what I wanted. I wanted the PlayStation 3 so I can play LittleBigPlanet, Metal Gear Solid and Sonic Unleashed" <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You can put Sonic Unleashed on the Hex Box as well as Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Too whiny to make out]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Nintendo just- rejected your offer? Cause I- I heard a rumor that there was going to be a Sonichu game or something. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris uh. Cassie wants you to send her your Wii number so she can talk to you on the Wii. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright uhhhhh. I'll get- have to get my Wii number now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Send it to her in an email please.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they completely hate Sony. And they hate Microsoft as well. I mean this guy, Reggie? He always talks about kicking their ass and stuff. He's kinda crazy. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I know. Reggie's very mean he never brought out ''[unclear]'' to America. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah I wanted to play that game.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talked over]'' -I'm tellin' you guys. Reggie's just a great ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Like what?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can- I can't say anything OK but... you'll see. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah so I don't think like if you got the deal with Nintendo I don't think they'd put it on like mu- like anything else but the Wii or DS. Yeah, cause that Reggie guy he frickin' hates Sony. And Microsoft. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font>Wasn't he also the head of VH1?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or Pizza Hut.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. What are your favorite places to eat at? <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember um he ''[unclear]'' -but before that he was with Sega when Dreamcast was out. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yup. Let me type this email please. I mean y'all keep talking I'll just listen. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's no reason to hate the Xbox. Let's be honest.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or um- Chris um- do you wanna release your game on Nintendo and on Sony. If you do talk to somebody like EA or something, you can like do um- multi-console thing like a (?) party thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[busy typing]'' Hmm. Well it's all to think about. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I mean Sega does third party now so um- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah well I'm gonna keep typing this email here. Y'all keep talking. <br />
<br>''[Sound of Chris typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's true, it's true. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Chris I wanted to tell you that Cassie's going to be here any- any second so you can talk to her. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Hm. ''[continues typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Don't you care about her? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[annoyed]'' I'm typin' da email to her right now! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah um 360 is pretty bad um- it red-rings all the time. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> I've had mine over two years. The same one. And it has not red-ringed yet. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Dude you have to pay $50 just so you can play online. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[echoing]'' Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah it's bullshit.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah it's totally free on PlayStation. And Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris. Chris. No, no, no, no, I gotta talk about this. [long pause] Chris...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupting]'' I get less connection problems myself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can't let you get away with this Chris. You spent over $1000 on the PlayStation Network. OK? And you say you can't afford $50 for the Xbox? Terrible reason. That's a terrible reason. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, um, Cogs I had a friend of mine whose red-ringed a lot of times. She did not like it at all. She got herself a PS3 instead. <br />
<br>''[Chris is STILL typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I heard that like- the PS triple eats up a lot of energy and like- has like- burned houses down. Cause it messes up the- no but the PS3 really- <br />
<br>''[More of Chris typing then audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So when's the next comic coming out Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I can't say. I don't have a date for it right now. I've been busy with the- with real life and such. You know getting the s- getting the website back up and all that. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh but I've been waiting so long. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I gotta tell you something Chris. ''[unclear]'' -to the trolls but I haven't done anythin' myself. It's run off into splinter groups doin' stuff to you. Ever since the Panda thing, I haven't done anything to you man. Everybody's been running round doing things. I have no control anymore. So I'm back here. This is why I'm back here. Do you understand? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. I hear you.<br />
<br />
===Nudes On YouTube===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I hear you got some uh- nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> What? <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hear you got some nudes on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> NUDES!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> That's what I thought- I have nothing na- I have nothing like that on the nu- on the YouTube. I've nothing like that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh someone posted the pics form the ED page. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> They're just tryin' ta get on- they're just tryin' ta get on my nerves again. But I'm not gonna let 'em.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Did you take those pictures or what? Where'd they come from?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Uh, are they Photoshopped?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah most of- Yes. Most of them are Photoshopped.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I can help you with ED. Chris I can help you with ED.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You can see the neck and the body doesn't quite match up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, Chris. Cassie's just arrived. She's a little nervous about talking to you, but she's gonna talk to you soon. Is that OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I just got one quick comment. The ED people were in contact with me, but I've lost contact with them. But I know you can delete that page permanently. I'm tryin' to help you man. You can get that page down forever. Even the entire site. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What, after you raped uhm- Sarah? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I'm trying to make amends. So let me do my business. All right?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's too late to make amends. Look what you did. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um. Cogsdev said she had a look at the data, they have it up in Image editing software.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah. Well...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I don't know what to tell you there. <br />
<br>''[Several trolls speak at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Doesn't that mean they're real? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I don't think so. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You don't think so?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Well, did you take them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Then where did those pictures come from? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who took those?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I don't know. And I'd rather not talk about that anymore. It's making me feel uncomfortable.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Are you lying to your fans Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> We don't feel confort- we don't feel comfortable. We're big fans of your work and we don't like being lied to. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I'd like to make a point. It might just be a doppelganger [sic].<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, you know the thing I hate most is lies. I like to spread the truth about you Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You say you're honest, but you're lying to us.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[clearly annoyed]'' Fine, fine. Some those pictures are real. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Some of them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Some of them but not all of them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Like, which ones aren't real?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'd rather not go into detail because I'd rather not look at 'em. Cause uh- ''[interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' -are you ashamed of it?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Do you not like to look in the mirror?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You owe it- you owe it to your fans.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, but- yeah, but- yeah, but upon looking at those it's like ref- it's like reflecting a pe- uh p- a past moment in my life where I- I was played for the fool. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah, by the man in the pickle suit?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh that guy- I hate that guy.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah I saw- he was trolling some other people you know? So you're not alone, Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he took pictures of me like that too...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That guy's an asshole, I hate him.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhhh yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He took pictures of my wife too. Sick bastard. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[I think she says he is a peanut]''<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br>[another pause]<br />
<br />
===Chris Hates Harry===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I just uh- never was fond of it. Ever since it came out, I was never fond of it. ''[unclear as troll speaks over]'' -just like I hate Harry Potter because he's s- he's goin- he's uh- in compe- was in competition against the world of Pokemon. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Well that- that doesn't make sense. But they're two different medias. Pokemon-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah but- yeah but still he-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> -Harry Potter is a book.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah but he poses as competition against them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> That's not really competition. I mean- <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talks over Jack]'' Oh that reminds me about books- Vivi- Vivian wrote a book and sent it to you. You never read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes. I am afraid I- yeah, yeah- I'm uh- I've been uh- so I've been under uh- too much stress between internet and all that. I'll ge- I'll read it, I'll read it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's been waiting for your response for quite a long time.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I like the cover. (pause) Nice cover.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he is right about that. That is a nice cover. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah the book is pretty good- I read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Well I- I will definitely make it a point to uh- read it. Very soon. <br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Audible over the others]'' Did you ever read Twilight?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I've heard th- I've heard Twilight and I've seen the trailer but I haven't seen the movie, I'll wait for it to come out DVD or Blu-ray.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br />
===Random Access Humor Python Style===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh OK, I heard a lot of girls like Twilight. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I see. Hey Polly does your voice sound like that, 'cause it sounds like [[BlueSpike|a guy talking falsetto]]. I mean no personal offense. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> That's not very nice...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm sorry. Believe me I didn't mean any pe- anything personal it's just like, you know- hm- kind- just kinda takes me by surprise a bit, that's all.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I knew a girl like that in high school.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Sounding upset]'' I can't help it if I'm born like this.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I'm- I'm- I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah she's a girl. I saw her pics. She's a girl.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I'll s- I'll take his word for it. I'm sorry I cu- I accused you there.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um. OK. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You know, aut- I mean- let's- it's just uh- you know it's uh- you know it's uh a bit- just a spot of fun. [[Random-access_humor|Stupid humor]]. Monty Python's Flying Circus. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> We know you love that. There's just so many references to it in the comic. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah I d- after they put all of the entire series on PlayStation Network I downloaded the Hamlet episode- that was the one that had uh- Jimmy Hill parodying himself. It also had this funny bit where it was like, you know- ''[in a stupid voice]'' "...and now it's time for The Robinsons, an everyday story about blah-de-blah-de-blah-de-blah. Dum-de-dum-de-dum-de-duhhh-dum-de-dum"- and so on...<br />
<br>''[A troll begins to speak but is interrupted by a very high-pitched Chris]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> "Morning Mrs. Robinson- Morning Mrs. Robinson. Comin' out shoppin'? Oh- you've been shoppin', what did you buy? What's this?-" 'What did you buy this for?'[Trolls laugh over him]'' -It was a bargain!"<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I've heard you do that before. I don't know where. Anyway uh- uhm- Whatever happened to Jimmy Hill? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I haven't heard from him in a long time so just assuming uh- he gave up or uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I think he got a- I think he got a, uh- children's TV program in England.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well he ain't botherin' me, so I'm not worried about him anymore.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Ye- but he's stealing Sonichu. Bastardizing it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah he did but uh- he s- but haven't seen any updates on his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' -profile, he's still doing it.<br />
<br>''[Several trolls talk over each other about him having a TV show]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Fails At Spanish Pt. 2===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' <br />
<br>''[Troll says something more about the TV show, but it's muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wants to say hi. Just forgive her English because she can't speak very well, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> All right. Just sent her the email by the way, just now. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Hey, Chris. It's me, Cassie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi, Cassie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Fine, and you?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm feelin' OK. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Why haven't you emailed me? I was really about-was really worried about you. What's happened? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry. I be- I've bee- I've been busy with the Internet and the stress and all that. I sent ya an email just now go- it's got my Wii number in it so you can add me to your contacts. I've been talking to uh- I've been talking to Sarah lot- quite a bit lately. She's been helping me with uh- updating the Sonichu site, since I've uh- since I'm working on uh- it's re-uploading and such. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Kay, I believe you. I going to check ''[pronounced like 'sheg']'' it, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You're going to where?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[very quietly]'' Check it.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> To check it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> To "shag-it"? Is that the-<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Check the email. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[still doesn't understand]'' Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> I going to check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, check email. ''[Laughs]'' Yeah I'm sorry I tr- I tried to uh- understand but it just kind of messed up a little bit. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don- why don't you two speak in Spanish?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhh. I'm not exactly fluent. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ¿Sabes hablar español, Chris? (Do you know how to speak Spanish?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí, hablo español. (Yes, I speak Spanish)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Oh. ''[pause, one of the trolls says something to her]'' Oh, eso es muy sexy. (That is very sexy.)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Ohhhh. Te gusta. Te gusta muchísimo, (You like it. You like it a lot)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> La verdad, si. (To tell you the truth, yes)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Me amos mis amigas muchísimas. Sons muy bueñas! (I love my friends (feminine) a lot. They are very good.) [Correction: Amo a mis amigas muchísimo. Son muy buenas.] <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Oh, eso es tan cool en español! Muy bueno! (That's so cool in Spanish! Very good)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Muy bueño (very good)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Aha, exacto. (it is!)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]'' Okay, that's good. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Well, I going down, okay?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Okay, you're going down- by the way, let me ask ya Cassie, do you ever- you've uh- you've actually met uh Sarah May in person, haven't you? <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Not. She's on Internet.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Okay. That's cool- but anyway uh- you got- you d- you have my Wii number, uh- you can reply the email with your Wii number and it'll be registered on the Wii network. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[very haltingly]'' Yes. So. Cool. Talk with you Chris. You are so cool. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Heh. Uhhhh. You flatter me. Tú me flatteray. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[Weak laugh]'' Well, see you. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[In his 'baby voice']'' Adiós. ''[sigh]'' <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós, bebé.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós, chiquita bonita. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>[Pause as audio cuts out]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -it again. <br />
<br>[Another pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So anyway, Chris. I've been working on Rabbichoso for a day and uh- I was just wonderin' like, it's- it's supposed to compete with the Sonichu, you know? If you weren't aware of that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhhh. I grabbed onto d- grabbed onto g I- grabbed onto the... that gist. I'm aware- I'm aware of the gist of the theory. Uh. I'm aw- I'm aware that you're- that you're tryin' to compete. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know what competition does. It's drives uh- it drives consumer interest- Well that's why you know- It's great. You have to compete with high quality things. ''[muffled]''- that's why I'm trying to help. You know, compete. Just so you're aware of this, OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I see. -see. <br />
<br>[Pause]<br />
<br />
===Rabbichoso And Animu===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris we've been ge- been getting uh threatening images from the Pickle Man. Did you s- did you see the left? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I've not heard from the Pickle Man in lo- in a long time. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Apparently there are multiple ones because this one is, uh, not a darkie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh-huh. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> It's good that they're leaving you alone now. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Seems like they found more easier targets. Seeing as how you became [[Navy|saltier]].<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh. You know I originally got that line- quote from an e- ep- episode of ExCel Saga. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> From what?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> ExCel Saga.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Oh, ExCel Saga. Oh, yeah, that's a good anime.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> AIII I-Falazzo! (''He means [[ScotPalazzo|Il-Palazzo]]'')<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, have you ever seen two animes, ''[muffled]'' and Schooldays?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I have not seen either of those. I like Steel Angel Kurumi as well.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, how much Japanese do you know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only a little bit. I'm not totally fluent. I can say that with all honesty. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something unintelligible, not quite Japanese]''<!-- It sounds like he's saying "You say you can't- can you speak with me?" in CHINESE. --><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Huh?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Never mind, you won't understand it.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[unclear] Chris-Chan. Genki desu-ka?''<br />
<br />
===Chris Could Kill Clyde===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, I just wanted to say, uh, you're doing a good job, like, keeping calm even though Clyde is here. I mean u- I thought you'd be, like, more angry at him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm being calm with you guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> -I would have been choking him by now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I'd have kicked his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Preach to the choir. Pr- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I'd make him choke on a pickle if it were up to me.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You guys can't touch me otherwise I'd kick all your asses. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, bring it.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris could kick Clyde's ass anytime.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Let's see Chris do it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Bring it to me any day of the week and I'll definitely show him a hard- day's night. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah I think you could kick his ass.<br />
<br>[Trolls and Clyde talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Sings]'' -been a hard day's night...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -never mind, just...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean that as a- meant that as in I would beat... him up. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Kick his ass?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm very strong. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. I'm gonna see you later, OK?<br />
<br>''[Unison of goodbyes]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> OK see ya. Thank you so much Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[ignoring his fans]'' Yeah I can- I can lift about my weight. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Like um- if Clyde were right in front of you, what would you do to him?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Like, what kind of style of fighting do you have?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, shut up.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I gotta know my competition. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Personal- in the physical offense. ''[sigh]'' I would definitely be giving you so much physical pain. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's not a s- that's not a style. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I would beat you up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He deserves it man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, that's still not a style...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He uses fisticuffs. He's a gentleman. Gentleman fisticuffs. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Whatever, I'll just see-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Stop arguing and just-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ''[Over previous troll]'' I mean, if he did that to my sweetheart I'd fucking kill him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well. He's not- he's not going to come over and kill me, I know that. He doesn't have the money. [pause] You know I'm surprised that you're mad here. You're much kinder in person I thought you- Now I'm just expecting you at my door anytime, just waiting for you to stand here with an axe or something. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Knives are too messy. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Ah, now a sword- sword's are usually better.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What about poison?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Poison's good, poison's good.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde, what- do you want him to beat your ass?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I was just expecting it, you know.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, you know what's another thing? I would definitely not tell you how I would be hurting you, but I would definitely give you a who- big amount of pain. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, he's gonna keep you guessin'!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he deserves it. After everything he's done-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Muffled by troll]'' -going to kill me, I'd like to know. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I'm just going to let you cover in- worry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh so you're never going to show up, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Oh yes I will show up. But you just won't be expecting it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't even know where I live, do you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Find out!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Maybe I should give you my address. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, you should track him down and kick his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> But I'm going to leave you guessing too...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Defend Panda's h- Panda's honor.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, hi Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> 'sup Julie.<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br>''[Everyone talks over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde's A Dick===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I notice her mic doesn't work. But still I'm just letting her know that- acknowledge her presence. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're doing well staying calm even though Clyde's here.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, Clyde's a total dick.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Fucker.<br />
<br>''[Rustling]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I mean, he's taken over everything. The IRC. This. I can't- no one can stop him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' -over there, so...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll:'''</font> I- I like Rabbichoso.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Of course you do. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll''':</font> It's funny. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I will not offer any new comment on it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, OK. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, when can we expect the next Sonichu to be released.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, we've been eager.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It'll be soon. It will be soon.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah just ignore Clyde man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean if you're going to put a hard date on it, you'd better deliver your promise. If you don't, I'll strike harder. That's all I'm saying.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. You're saying if I don't set a date, you're gonna...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no. I'm saying don't make promises you can't keep. Don't make promises you can't keep.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He'll choke you with his medallion bitch!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who the hell do you think you are?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I agree with Cogs over there. Maybe you should do just a page a day, not release all at once. Keep his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you telling him this when he hates you?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm giving him suggestions man, OK? OK?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Only thing he's gonna suggest to you is 'shut the fuck up'!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, seriously man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It's alright. <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Penny Arcade's slow.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh you mean like Penny Arcade or ''[unclear]'' or MegaTokyo?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they're just like- boring. Then they because sellouts. <br />
<br />
===Chris's Country Cookin===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Chris, where's your favorite place to eat?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. Can't really say uh- but I like country cookin'. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> What's country cooking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh no G's in the sto- no G's in the name by the way, no G. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah what's country cooking? I'm not familiar with that.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's like uh- som- something like Golden Corral. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But Golden Corral is a national franchise.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh Chris, how are your parents?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> They're OK.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br>[Long pause]<br />
<br />
===Sex Is Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I've got a sug- another suggestion. Now be quiet all of you cause I know you hate me. Just- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, Chris hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well don't defend him. He can defend himself OK? He's a man. But whatever-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let him speak.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm suggesting that- you go on and on about this sex stuff but you've never gotten laid, have you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I like to put myself in the imaginative situation that I'd like to be in and the sexual stimulation. So I can be ready for [[ego|myself]] for when I do actually have my first time.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well my first time was- I'll just say that it's terrible, OK? I didn't know what I was doing, she didn't know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let me guess, you prematurely ejaculated?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no, it's not like that you don't know what to do. Every woman's told me OK? You can't prepare-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Clyde]'' First time's always awkward...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -I learnt that mistake a while back, OK whatever. OK, you just- you can't prepare for your first time. You might as well just have a really bad first time so you learn from your mistakes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm not trying to defend Clyde or anything, but yeah it's kinda true. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Hmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The girl I first fell in love with is the girl I'm married to right now. Samantha just changed my world. But marriage does get boring.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Tips To STAY STRAIGHT===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I know how you say how important it is to stay straight, um- I'm having trouble staying straight, do you have any suggestions?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Watch a bunch of pornography with uh- with naked women. OK, a lot of naked women.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That happened to me one time...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, I have this friend I play video games with, is that gay? He's male by the way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry could you- I'm sorry could you repeat that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I have this guy I'm friends with he always comes over to my house to play video games. Is that gay? I'm kinda scared. You know? I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Hmm. Is he making any advances towards you? Personally. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I dunno how to tell. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Like uh sit- does he always sit next to you when he's playing games. Playing video games.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Yeah he usually does. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I see. Hmm. My- well- my suggestion in that case, would be to keep a heavy distance between you and that guy. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he meant anything gay by it though. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he means anything like- gay about it. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well, still- it's always best to find out- you can ask him. Don't be afraid to ask him. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> What would you do in this situation?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well if he said yes then I would uh- basically- let me think about that a moment. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you have any friends who're are like, guys?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only acquaintances and only a few of them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you play video games with people or anything? Do they come over to your house?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. No.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I remember-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> ''[Cuts Polly off]'' I'm just worried I might be gay or something. I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You probably are Falsion, but that's OK. No, look dude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Leave him alone! Leave him alone! He's straight!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Why?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Hey, let's have a calm conversation here. Let's not have any fights.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br>''[Trolls speak over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I've been reading the Sonichu comics and man, they are page-turners! Seri- I was on- I was on the edge of my seat for a while. I ju- I couldn't- I couldn't- you know. Just had to read and read.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Thank you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, can I be your friend? I know I'm a guy. I don't mean anything gay by it. Can I be your friend? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. I dunno. <br />
<br />
===A Wild Snorlax Appears===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Do you want any hotdogs?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I'm OK. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> No?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I was talking with my mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I was wondering if I could be your friend.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I h- heard you only like, you only like to be acquaintances. With guys. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, ummm. Let's just pretty much leave it at acquaintance. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hello Mrs. Chandler. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> She can't hear you, I'm wearing my earphones.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Listen, I'm not gay. I don't- you know- yeah. Never mind.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I mean- I mea- I-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What do you have against gay people? I'm serious to hear this. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's just unnatural and it's against God's will. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, it's not like it's a choice. You can't change who you are like- you're a creative guy but I mean they're just gay. They can't change that. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm just answering a few questions mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You don't have to answer. Nobody's payin' you to do that.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yes they are.<br />
<br>''[shuffling sounds, clanging]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> It ain't none of their business no-way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I wouldn't be asked questions like that by employers or anybody. Don't tell people what you d- what you think. Keep that to yourself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris what's hap- what's happening?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, obviously, my mother is offering her input.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Tell her you're just talking to some friends. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' I don't need no back talk from somebody on the other end of the phone.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear you, Mom. Hmm. Hmm. <br />
<br>''[scraping sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> These- these idiots don't have any brains or- they don't have any idea this way or that.<br />
<br>''[more banging, clanging and tumbling sounds. Sounds like washing up]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Is right now a bad time right now? I mean-<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Pixelblocks, Pixelblocks!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Someone's saying "Pixelblocks." <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you saying [[Pixelblocks]]?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>''[Chris's mom has been singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful singing voice, Chris.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[Audio cuts back in]'' -all the anxiety, causing you stress.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, well sometimes they don't; they can be peaceful.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Well, your mom and dad get the crappy end of the stick.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm, a lot of us do.<br />
<br>''[more clattering sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Yeah, just like this nasty mess over here that you guys left that I got to clean up.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm. ''[Audio cuts]'' -Yeah, I took care of my bills. I mean, not completely, but I took care of them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> What about going to, uh, Redmond?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> We! (Wii?) <br />
<br>[unintelligible, windows beeps]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[laughing]'' Yeah, sweetheart pool.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Mmhmm. ''[laughing]'' Like the other side of the pillow.<br />
<br>''[someone sighing. Clanging noises return after short absence]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' ...is all, I mean, living with your parents is okay bad-in today's bad economy, but at 26, come on. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Shut up, you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I'm being nice.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde isn't so bad a guy. He does bad things, but he's pretty cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah he's reformed. He's seen the error- Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How- how could he do that to Sarah? I mean- That's not right.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah. Well, that's like Luke... That's like Luke and Laura from General Hospital. I know that's like, before y'all's time, but, um... Luke was a rapist and she-he raped Laura and then, like, a few months later they get married. So... ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, I believe Clyde was trying to make amends from his past actions.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, but Chris, can you uh- can you forgive him?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Random Troll:'''</font> ''[whispering]'' White whale, holy grail! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Can you forgive a small-dicked Asian? Just a thought.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He's not Asian! <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm half-Asian, okay? My parents ''[unclear]'' I don't really wanna go into it. It's too bo-boring for you people. But this is why I ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you there? Just makin' sure, buddy.<br />
<br>''[clattering]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Move out.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Another Troll''':</font> Well, how do I do that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi there, my kitty. ''[In baby voice]'' Yes, there's a pretty kitty.<br />
<br>''[Someone speaking with a voice-synth]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hang on a second. I've got, like, a thousand different... Oh, Crass, why'd you do that?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Because. You can unban him but, yeah. I'm not gonna friggin' stand for that. <br />
<br>''[Sound of a vacuum cleaner]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> I (m j d?) do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I heard the "g" word.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um, is that a vacuum cleaner?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Yeah, sounds like it is.<br />
<br>[Trolls speak but are drowned out by vacuum]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ...room or something.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I think the vacuum cleaner... <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If that's the government trying to do some kind of thing, then my name's Rusty Shackleford.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's a loud fan.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I have a fan above my stove, too.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Hey... I do, too.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Wait- wha- wait. You-you-you're in the kitchen? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Me too.<br />
<br>''[possibly Sonic game sound effects]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmhm? Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I'm pretty sure it's already asked, but I didn't catch the answer. When can we expect the next Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I-I-I told you my suggestion of releasing a page a day or something. I mean, it's a pretty good one. It-it-it allows for a good time. Finish a page a day. You upload it. You know? It's very good. Works very well.<br />
<br>''[Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh. I mean- you guys keep asking when he's going to finish it but I wonder how many pages are going to be in the new one? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> The last one was like, thirty. Just release it over the span of a month. Works fine. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...go up to ninety thousand...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[mutters something]''<br />
<br>''[Sound of Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Down by the river...side.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful voice, Chris.<br />
<br>''[clattering, typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[unclear, repeating the same two phrases]'' Gone down by the river, down by the water side, down by the riverside. Down by the waterside. Down by the riverside.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember ''[unclear]''<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -I'm hungry myself.<br />
<br>''[some kind of alarm sounding]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Then go eat.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I already ate.<br />
<br />
===Anime And Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I wonder what anime Chris watches nowadays. There's not many on television but do you still watch Japanese cartoons? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[In a bad accent]'' Kawaii desu ne. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I want to watch Shuffle. He said it was very good. He said it was sad. I don't know if I wanna watch- I don't like sad stuff. I like to be happy when I watch anime.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, and um, do you watch stuff like Bleach and um Code Geass or Naruto or something?<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I'm glad to hear that Shuffle isn't sad. I'm definitely going to watch it sometime.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um, yeah Chris that was a good call on Naruto. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah there's a lot of people who don't like it much either. Too popular.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But please. Please. Hope. ''[audio cuts out briefly]'' Uh, Chris, please consider When They Cry.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Ooh, I saw that one. It was a really good series.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, I know; that was good, like- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah. Both seasons of it. <br />
<br>''[Windows beeps, voices overlapping]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I could link you to Season One if you want. Yeah, Samantha got me into that. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...you'll give it a try, Chris. It's a very, very good series.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Hm. Hey, Julie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...lots of ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Watch Shuffle. You got the six episodes of Shuffle or... Which o- which anime? I'm sorry. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh and JoJo's Bizarre Adventure is also cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I really liked JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. Very ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Za warudo!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah, I think Shuffle is quite all right. I like Heidi. She's sweet and loyal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> That's a good one. One of my favorites is Black Lagoon.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris have you ever seen La Blue Girl?<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other about different anime]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, uh, Chris can I, my, uh, I don't know if it's all right, but, like, could you like, give me an email sometime? I could, uh... recommend you to... this anime that... Polly and... Julie like to watch. They're quite- they... Oh, C-and Cogs has recommended such great anime. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[talking to his mother]'' Yeah? That's ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> As well as Julie-Julie's the person that got me into anime.<br />
<br />
===People Love Poketunes===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> -we can go into this later cause I got my headphones on. And, Mom, you know what something else? They liked your singing.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> What? I don't sing.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> That's my laugh; that's my laugh. They couldn't hear me. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They heard you. Singin'. Just now.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I can't sing!<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I'm tone deaf. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They just heard you singing, and liked your voice.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay. Did you write checks for all those bills and pack everything ''[unclear]''?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yes, Mother, I did.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You're not telling me no story?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm not telling you no story.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> OK. It's important [''inaudible''] did you pay them?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, I paid that one. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay, you have to be honest with me, 'cause, see, you're settin'...<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm being honest, I'm being honest.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> How you respond to what [we] talk about. You say you ought to something and you don't do it then that's gonna change my ideas ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay... I'll be sure to pay the remaining differences next month.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> No, this month.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I know but I couldn't pay them all with 90 dollars so there's still some left ''[sound cuts]'' ...oh, you're cooking them up here, okay, that's why you turned the fan on over the stove.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br>''[Trolls rejoice and mock Momma Chandler]''<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 1|Mumble Chat 1]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 3|Mumble Chat 3]]|}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Spanish]]<br />
==Links==<br />
*[https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBOVVDS0JtSDNvMWs Download]<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_2&diff=162997Mumble 22012-09-26T20:47:09Z<p>Irisviel: </p>
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<div>{{Articleofthenow}}<br />
[[Image:0839-MomDesi.JPG|thumb|right|180px|In Mumble 2, a Wild [[Barbara Chandler|Snorlax]] appeared.]]<br />
<br />
'''Mumble 2''' is the second [[Mumble]] chat that took place on 4 [[February 2009]]. More than an hour long.<br />
<br />
This is a more organized Q&A type chat than [[Mumble 1]]. Questions from [[Clyde]] about [[sex]] in the [[comic]] and interesting tidbits about how Chris believes sex is the same as romance. This is pretty hard hitting, with stuff like how Chris is into [[McDonald's|fast food]] yet he's against tobacco. A lot of drama involving Clyde.<br />
<br />
Length: '''1:49:17'''<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
<br />
===Notes===<br />
* Chris doesn't like Clyde because he stole his sweetheart.<br />
* Audio cuts out for a minute before Chris says: "...HYMEN!" (You broke her hymen)<br />
* Trolls claim [[Panda]] is with Clyde, Chris wants to hear her voice, they say she's busy<br />
* 'She and I WERE very close'<br />
* Chris didn't have $400-$800 to go and see Panda; claims he got this number from an airport website recommended by [[Miyamoto]]<br />
* Insists on [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] being in ''[[Animal Crossing]]''<br />
* Doesn't want to talk about his deal with them<br />
* Insists that he doesn't have to turn down his radio since his voice is louder (''it is horribly loud in the mic'')<br />
* Panda gave Clyde all of the sites, etc.<br />
* [[Sarah]] is going to be with Clyde, which Chris wants to deny<br />
* These motherfuckers keep talking over each other<br />
* Calls a troll's critique crap<br />
* [[Bubbles]] must be aroused, she isn't wet all the time<br />
* Bubbles is 90% water so does sperm just swim around forever? NO<br />
* Clyde: This is a children's comic, why so much sex?<br />
: '''Chris:''' It is romance. My best artwork is when they're making out 'romantic moments', drawn in protest to trolls. Shows that [[Rosechu]]s have vaginas, not [[duck]]s.<br />
* Admits to maybe going overboard<br />
* Trolls try to reason with him about the [[ED]] article: There wouldn't be an article if he didn't react like he does.<br />
* Trolls say that TV-Y7 means NO SEX but Chris points to romantic anime that have making out (cartoons are for kids, whatever the content).<br />
* Trolls talk about Japan being less strict about those things<br />
* Everyone gets to vote in [[CWCville]], even if they're [[Niggos|black]].<br />
* Got his idea from [[Mary Poppins]].<br />
* Troll tries to give historical background about cough medicine putting kids to sleep. Chris insists it was the lullaby that put them to sleep.<br />
* Discussion about Chris, 'gay message' sent by a troll<br />
* He calls Clyde a scoundrel<br />
* BELIEVE HIM HE IS STRAIGHT<br />
* Chris tries to speak Mexican at 20:50<br />
* Mexican speaks Mexican to him... he replies in Menglish<br />
* [[4-cent_garbage]] is located in Mexico<br />
* Someone says that he needs to improve his Mexican<br />
* Chris is against smoking, CWCville is smoke and alcohol free<br />
* Rehash of why [[tobacky]] is bad, his position on it, alcohol=bar fights<br />
* Chris's dad smoked and had several bypasses, has a pacemaker and has had heart attacks<br />
* Mention of his hair cuttings for his fans<br />
* Chris was doing math in his head, got in car crash.<br />
* Chris has taken college level math. Took trigonometry.<br />
* Trolls gang up on Clyde for stealing Panda<br />
* Time will tell when Chris will make the money he would have in the Nintendo deal<br />
* Trolls bash Clyde for his pot smoking <br />
* Chris doesn't watch news because it's bad news =(<br />
* Bashing of the Mexican<br />
* Chris can type 30 to 100 WPM, but can't type and talk at the same time<br />
* Chris says [[PSN]] is free though Clyde(?) points to the $1,000 Chris spent on PSN<br />
* Chris has been typing for 15 minutes now and it is VERY loud<br />
* Chris has been busy IRL therefore the comic release doesn't have a date<br />
* Someone points to nudes on [[YouTube]].<br />
* He does not have it on the YouTube, but he isn't going to take it anymore.<br />
* Claims some of the photos are photoshopped.<br />
* Clyde offers help to take ED page down.<br />
* Chris denies taking those pictures, doesn't want to talk about it, making him uncomfortable.<br />
* Some of the pictures are real. When questioned which ones are fake, Chris can't answer.<br />
* Chris hates Harry Potter because it was in competition with [[Pokémon]]!<br />
* Chris is too stressed to read Vivian's [[A Girl Who Brought Down the World|book]], but he likes the cover!<br />
* Polly, who has been talking the whole time is confronted by Chris who thinks she is a guy. Polly is upset. Chris apologizes.<br />
* [[Jimmy Hill]] has launched his Sonichu show<br />
* More Mexican talk at 55:10<br />
* Chris giggles and sighs happily when Cassie, another Mexican, compliments him and when she leaves he says 'Chiquita Bonita'<br />
* Rabbichoso talk (Sonichu.info)<br />
* Classic trolls are leaving Chris alone.<br />
* Chris likes Steel Angel Kurumi (''quote from [[Wikipedia:Steel Angel Kurumi|Wikipedia]]: often classified as ecchi due to the focus on fanservice and panty shots'')<br />
* Chris claims to be very strong, could beat Clyde up. Says he would show Clyde a [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force|Hard Day's Night]], and would give Clyde pain.<br />
* ShinyMarshtomp makes an appearance? Likes Rabbichoso<br />
* Chris likes to eat at [[Country Cookin]] (''like Golden Corral'')<br />
* Chris likes to imagine his first time. <br />
* Clyde says the first time is awful, Chris said it was because Clyde prematurely ejaculated<br />
* Watch porn with naked women to cure your gay<br />
* Guys sitting next to you = gay coming on to you<br />
* Falsion has been in the chat room and is afraid he is gay<br />
* A wild Snorlax appears<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
<br />
===Waiting for Chris===<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I can't wait to hear Chris! I'm a huge fan!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, goddamn these noodles are fantastic. Man, I wish I could eat like this everyday.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Have you eaten the rice balls?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no. These are noodles. These are-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Fan-fucking-tastic.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now they're all gone, it's fantastic, you know?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Sweetangie is Chris. Or, we think so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's definitely not the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm disappointed there's so many impostors out there. Kinda my fault, but, you know, if it weren't- ''[unintelligible]'' -hard to come by.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His mic was working last time he was here, just fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He usually capitalizes his words, like in every sentence.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is- I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Is it set to push to talk or something?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You better get us your email address Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah its push to talk. It's called push to talk. It's fantastic ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, just have him set it to voice activity. It works so much better that way.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Aww, he left.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> You guys are fucking idiots.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other again]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You guys scared him off by being guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, you fucking jackasses. Nice going.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Was that even the real...?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yes, that was the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He's too much of a pussy to talk.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, cause you scared him, or some- No, or he's too stupid to be.<br />
<br>''[Trolls Laugh]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Arrives===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Chris arrives, with radio playing loudly]'' Hello.<br />
<br>''[Trolls all greet him]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, now-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Why haven't you got your microphone working?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't know why my microphone [is] messed up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry, but we had an impostor here before.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm registered. I've got myself registered now. So, uh, hopefully-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> That's probably why. It had to like, uh- calibrate.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Well, I'm calibrated now.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So, Chris, have you seen Rabbichoso, it's fantastic.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't give a crap about your stupid pencil sketch.<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am not listening. I do not have to listen to ''you''.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Why, I'm not understanding [inaudible]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well for one thing,and I'll say it on here, you stole my sweetheart!<br />
<br>''[Cutout continues]''<br />
<br />
===PandaHalo, Trip to Redmond and Animal Crossing===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You broke her hymen!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I know it's a terrible mistake, but I plan to make it up to her. I'm getting married and uh- I'm doing the things I should do.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh and another thing, if she is really over there with you now, then put her on the mic. Please.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> She's not- He never said-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, Chris, she's very busy, OK. She's very busy.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's not over here right now. Okay? So lets drop it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, fine. Well could you tell her to please send me a message lettin' me know, for sure, so I can know- so I can know to-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' I'll let her know whatever you want, but it's her life. She doesn't have to send you a message. You failed her. You failed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' She and I were very close.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If you we're so close, then why didn't you go?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' Because I had- Aw, hang on a second. How do I- oh, that's right. This thing. Right. Mmm. Hold on a sec. Oh yeah, because I did not have four to eight hundred dollars!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It doesn't cost that much to go cross-country man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes it does. I know, I saw it on an airport website. Where I was be- Where I was- recommended to me by Mr. Miyamoto.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, you can drive there. It's not that hard.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened with that? I thought, um, didn't you have a deal with them or something? I heard a rumor that your characters were going to be in Animal Crossing.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, they are in Animal Crossing. And I did- and I do- I did have a deal with them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened though?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' I'd rather not say.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Radio, Clyde and Criticism===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, why don't you turn down the TV? It's hard to hear you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Annoyed sigh]'' I do not have a TV turned on in here.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I can hear it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have a radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I hear something in the background.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Burping throughout sentence]'' Well that's the- that would b- the radio. And it is not that loud.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But it shows up pretty well on your microphone mic. With due respect.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But still, my voice is louder than the radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Ah goo- ahh given.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh, Chris? Uh, when are you going to do the new Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something over Polly]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' Uh, I'll answer Polly's question. I'm not sure. It's, uh, it's in progress right now, I'm drawing it up.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I can't wait to read it!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Well, we'll see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Listen, Clyde kind of has admin on here, so we can't really do anything about him. So, yeah. I don't know.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Hard to hear over Chris's radio]'' ...with you guys. I love you guys. Just as much as Chris loves you guys. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I was angry. I was angry. But I'm calm now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't try to hurt any other person from now on.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm doing the best I can. I'm doing the best I can.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have much- I do not have much to say in response to that right now. Because I'm ticked off.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't let him get to you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're no better than he is, if you give in.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris, I just wanted to let you know I'm a huge fan of the comics, and I'm glad you keep doing what you're doing. You're doing a great job, and just keep it up, alright man?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, yeah, I appreciate the, uh, what's the word I'm looking for? The, the, uh- well, the encouraging words. Encouragement. I appreciate the encouragement. Well, there are things, uh- I- er- current events I do not appreciate. I appreciate the positive encouragement.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I can't really do anything. He took over the IRC channel. I used to be the owner. I mean Clyde. He's like taking over everything.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, it was because Panda gave it to me, you know. But anyway, I mean, you can't just listen to encouragement, you've got to listen to criticism, man. Criticisms are what make you better, you learn from your mistakes. You learn from mistakes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Be right back guys, my wife is calling.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I don't- I don't- Tons of people don't like the Rabbichoso art style, but you know, I gotta improve on that. That's something I plan to improve on. There's a lot of criticism in the death of Sonichu, right? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What? What did you just say?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a lot of criticism of Sonichu. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. For a moment there I thought you said something different.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What, what did you think I said? I'm just saying, there are people who like it and people who don't like it. You gotta start taking in those suggestions. You know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. So many things that will be improved upon. But, I just have to hear from Sarah herself that she really is going to be with you, Clyde. I have to hear it from herself. It's one thing to hear it from you and then it's- then on that note, it's just I find it very hard to believe. So I have to hear it from her.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I kinda think that Rabbichoso sucks. I mean, I think it could be funny, but it honestly looks like it's drawn by a kindergartner.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, Sonichu has evolved over the years. You can see that the art's getting better. Rabbichoso doesn't even look like something a beginner would do, honestly. I mean, ''[Interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A whole bunch of crap!<br />
<br>''[Everyone starts talking at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, Sonichu is in color.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I know, I accept his criticism. But you just called it crap! Now that's just rude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have emotions going behind me- uh, behind that opinion.<br />
<br />
===Cassie===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, did you get my message.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Aren't you going to be the gentleman, then? Aren't you gonna be the gentleman?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I just want to ask you, Chris. I'm Cassie's friend. She- she's worried sick about you. Why haven't you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did email her! As a- I- I haven't gotten any re-plies from her. I have emailed her and I have instant messaged her on A.I.M. and Skype. I haven't heard back from her. I don't know what's going on there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> ...you emailed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> When was the last time you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, hang on, I'll check.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris? I have a question. My fa- One of my favorite new characters is, um, Simonla, and like, I also like Zapina as well. Um, are they gonna have bigger parts in the series later on?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, could you repeat that question?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I was wondering if Simonla and Zapina will either have bigger parts in the series later on. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [[Sonichu_10#The_Final_Countdown|Possibly]]. Possibly, but, uh, I can't say for sure. Oh, and, uh, to answer your question, uh- in answer to, uh, I believe, uh, Screwhead, who asked? It was about four days ago. About four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Yeah. Four days ago? Okay, I'll tell her to check it out.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> The last email I sent was about four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> She'll contact you in a while, though.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I'll tell her to check it out and- and thanks Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright. Mm.<br />
<br />
===Bubbles's Pussy and Sex in the Comics===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris? I have a question.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, my favorite character is Bubbles, I kinda liked the, uh, the thing she had going with Blake, where she was kind of keeping the relationship secret. I thought that was kinda clever. I was wondering, uh, she's a water-type, so does that mean that her vagina is always wet, or does she have to be aroused like a normal woman?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, aroused. That's applied for all the, uh, Rosechus there. And also, like, you know, she's not just a water-type, she's also- she's a water- and electric-type, like uh- oh, shoot- What's the name of that one? Originated from Gold-Silver-Crystal series, uh, evolves from Chinchou? Lanturn. And she has, uh, she has Volt Absorb ability.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, Chris, another question following Bubbles. Uh, her body is 90% water, and now this thing about the whole sexual intercourse- about it. Now, don't take this rude, and you don't need to answer me... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...I totally respect your creative work. My wife actually got me into this, uh, show actually. So, what happens is- like, as you know, like, semens are like little fishes in themselves. Would that mean, I mean, would they actually have a route to fly into the egg, in theory, or do they just swim around her whole body, just forever just swimming around.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. The, uh, the internal or- the internal organs uh, for the Rosechus are pretty much the same thing, so I'd say pre- about, uh, as good chance as most any other mammal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, so you mean she's able to control her density a little bit more. She- I understand now. She's able to control more her density from the 90% water. Okay. That pretty much answers it just perfectly. That's been bothering me at work. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I got another question, Chris, about this whole sexual thing. I mean, this is a children's comic, right? Why is there so much sex in it?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. It's called romance, and my- and my- if you'll notice throughout the comics my best pieces of artwork among which were those where dey were kissing and making out. Romantic moments.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a hidden page-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' And because- and because- and because of the tension from, uh, the trolls and Encyclopedia Dramatica, I just felt like doing that in protest against them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, but childre-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' Yes but how is that really a protest? That, you know, you know, are, are you like referencing to the 60's when women burned their bras? That was in protes- That was feminism. Saying that they weren't slaves to men. Do you even understand the whole thing?<br />
<br>''[Multiple voices are heard at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Now, to tell you the truth, I never really thought about, I never really thought about that when I-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Chris]'' Then how is, stripping was, how was that protest-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Jack]'' It shows that they have vaginas and NOT dicks. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well you know the dick thing was the fact that they were just, you know, mocking you. I think you went overboard with that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well maybe I did. Maybe I did. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, you did, because that seems kind of excessive, kind of-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' I don't think they would have even bothered to write about an article about you if you didn't just keep reacting like that.<br />
<br />
===Chris justifies sex in a kids' comic===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I have another question.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The point some of us are trying to make is, if it's TV-Y7 that means there should really be no sex in it at all.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible over other people]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's pretty much incorrect, I mean, uh, there's so many romantic anime that's TV-Y7, and they shoul- they have making out.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, a lot of things in Japan, Japan has stricter standards-not stricter, I mean looser guidelines than America. It's much different.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear ya.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I was just wondering what Bubbles, um, she has a, that water whirlwind attack, I was just curious if you had any plans to make- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Butting in]'' By the way, that was a Whirl- Whirlpool.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font>Yeah, Whirlpool, sorry, sorry, Whirlpool, but do you have any plans to mix an, uh, Electric-type attack with that, since water conducts electricity, right? It could be a very powerful-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah, she did, she did an electric attack amongst the- the walls of that Whirlpool and she let out. In case you didn't know, there's a- little bits of lightning bolts among which-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, oh, I'm sor- I didn't notice that, I'm sorry, I'll go take another look. Thank you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hey Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> You make some pretty sweet Little Big Planet levels.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you.<br />
<br />
===Chris on Benadryl babysitting===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, there's a message from Cogs on the side, it's about, uh, do women not have the right to vote already in CWCville.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, evry- Everybody, no matter what age, no matter what gender or race, everybody has the right to vote in CWCville. Even if they're black.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Then what's up with the "Votes for Women" thing, I was-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Not just vote women, but- ''[interrupted]'' any other ethnicities, and gays?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't understand-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did that- heard it in Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What? Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, man, Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, yeah, that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's a classic. It's my favorite movie of all time.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that movie was, like, based in the 1900s.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but still I- still I agreed with that message there-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Taken out of context, that makes it seem like CWCville's set in the 1960s.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What message? That children should be given cough medicine so they'll go to sleep?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''What?''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that's what women used to do back in- That's what mothers, friggin' nurses and stuff used to do to kids in the 1900s, is give children, like, you know, cough medicine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Cause- cause the medicine- uh, correction, the medicine did not put them to sleep, there was a lullaby, not the cough medicine. They only had to take the cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ...because it rained, before dere, and it was not, and it was to, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Rain means cough medicine doesn't have anything to do with each other. That's not how friggin' germs are spread, or colds are gotten. Colds are gotten through germs, not the rain.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How is cough medicine any different from today's parents that just let their kids watch TV until they fall asleep? I mean, it's just as bad.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well- Cough medicine has a lot to do with the psychological effects of it. Obviously if you get- if you keep giving fre-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Thanks, Samantha, that was delicious.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's my, uh, Samantha-<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, that's we're all saying, cause I've heard that there's a lot of different chemicals in cough medicine. You could pick up a ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I don't even take cough medicine, because I'm not a pussy.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Anyway, I never put any references, I never did any references or plan any references to cough medicine or anything of that sort.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Well, Chris, Cassie says the last e-mail she got from you was on the 17th. How 'bout your being gay? Is that true?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[sigh]'' That wa- That was somebody had- That was Clyde hacking through my e-mail and spammed that to my contacts.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, I definitely did not do that-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You're a scoundrel-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -a slanderous lie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I did not do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Whoa-whoa-whoa. Wow. Well, thanks for that. She was worried that you were- that you don't like her.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> You're a scoundrel, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't do that. That was someone else.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I was wondering, because I've heard other news too, I was really hoping that you weren't gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Believe me, I'm straight.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I'll take your word for it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you. And, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Cogs- Cogs got a way- she showed us that, okay? I mean, you only ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br />
===Chris's fail-riffic Spanish===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So, Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, Screwhead's from Mexico. I heard you like Spanish, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hola, Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You know Spanish, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí. Conoso Mexico. Tomé dos años ''[unclear]'' mi escuela secundaria. (Yes, I know Mexico. I took two years [in, possibly] my secondary school.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has venido en Mexico? (Have you come to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, lo siento? (Uh, I'm sorry?)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has estado en Mexico? (Have you been to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Estoy Mexico? No. (I am Mexico? No.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[slowly]'' Has estado, um, in Mexico. Has venir? (Have you been to Mexico? Have gone?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Uh, no, I hav- no, no tengo pansars. ''[sic]'' (no, I don't have pansars (?))<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I think, uh, I think I meant to say- I'm pretty sure-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Did you just say you don't wear pants?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, no, I was trying to say, ah, I don't have plans to go in Mexico at the moment.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's what I understood what he was saying there.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, did you know that, that 4-cent garbage website is located in Mexico?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> That's why-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, that's why they can't get it shut down.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]'' borders, plus it's cheaper to run sites over there; they have, like, several servers.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wanted to talk to you, but she couldn't make it here, well, and, she wants to be your Spanish teacher, because she says that you've got room to improve your Spanish.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Oh, that Cassie. Yeah, I'm sorry, I thought you were- I got mixed up. Um... Yeah, um, I'm sorry, I, uh, I haven't talked to that- I haven't talked to Cassie in a while, but I've been mostly talking to, uh, her gal- her, uh, gal-pal and I'm sure- I'm sure she'd tell you a lot about her...<br />
<br />
===In which the trolls discuss bar fights===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey Chris, how- how does Sonichu keep Rosechu from spending more than a hundred dollars at the mall? I've always wondered how he could manage to do that. I've always had problems with that myself.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That wa- That time at the mall, it was, uh, Kel loaned the credit card. And it's like, yeah- she gave- she gave Sonichu the responsibility of that credit card. She did.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I've always given my advice on cannabis, you should do the ''[unintelligible]'', Cogs Chris, but I think she wants your response.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, one of my friends sent me this picture, and I think you might find it kinda disturbing just because they say it's proof that you're gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Aw yeah, I saw that, that's just a crappy Photoshop.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No, that one doesn't- this one doesn't look Photoshopped at all.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'm not gonna look at it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Oh, you're not? Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, uh, you say you're against smoking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. As a matter of fact, CWCville is a smoke-free, non-alcoholic city.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[partially drowned out]'' That's what we call a totalitarian state...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, and, uh, in the pilot episode with Seth MacFarlane, of, you know, Family Guy? He's always smoking. What do you think about that?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Go smoke.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I just- I just take that with a grain of salt, and, uh, you know, that's what-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, if he can smoke, why can't anyone else? I mean, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Because it causes cancer!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> So does a lot of things.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> It could be a prop pipe.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> In any case, I'm not- in any, in any case I've never done it and I never will.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, but eating too much fast food can give you a heart attack. I mean... so many things are deadly for you.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What about fast food, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> My father used to smoke and he went through a whole bunch of heart attacks. He suffered three- <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Well, I think that might have to do more with his weight.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He suffered through three or four triple bypasses.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I think that's... that's more like a weight issue.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He has a pacemaker!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, eh...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey ya guys, leave him alone. Ya know, my granddad, he smoked most of his life. He quit for 25 years and still died of lung cancer. I mean that's just the way it is. And your body never gets rid of it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, what about ''[pause]'' Chris, what about fast food? That's- that's bad for you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey Chris. Chris, could you do me a favor and send an email to Cassie? She's very worried about you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Yeah sure, I'll send her an email later.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, thanks.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, I've got uh, a certain someone you know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No no.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -she has to, uh, she wants to ask you w- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Also, she said something about some hair.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh yeah. Yeah, that's uh... that's another issue right there. Um, hmmm. I'll talk to her about that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, does, uh, drinking cause cancer?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, but it causes liver dysfunction and likely bar fights and automobile accidents.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, bar fights, but— <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Bar fights!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> -but I don't think that bar fights are that big of a problem.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I think bar fights are awesome.<br />
<br>''[People agree bar fights are awesome]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> But bar fights are bad. I got into a bar fight once and one of my hands got cut and two fingers from my left hand. Bar fights suck.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well, I think that might be more because you're Mexican. Are you sure you didn't lose them picking bo- picking grapes and- or something?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> No, Mexican people are more more- more much macho man; we get into bigger fights. We're more awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No- I think it might be because you got your hands stuck in some machinery when you were out picking in the vineyards.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't know about you guys, but I like- I like having bar fights.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Crashes Due To Math===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't have to be drunk to be in a bar fight or in an automobile accident, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but they increase the likeliness of it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You've been in an autobile— automobile accident, I mean, were you drunk?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I was distracted.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Uh, by what? I mean, it's kinda hard to be dist— you gotta be focused on driving man-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I was doing math in my head.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, math in your— <br />
<br>[Trolls talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> My mind got distracted by being its own calculator.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Are you good at math?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, is that for school?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Are you some kind of savant?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's impossible.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Guys, you're getting ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you like a mathematic genius or something?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> You know some artist people have like superpowers in their head. They can do like geniuses and add really well. ''[interrupted briefly by Jack saying something else about savant]'' Chris you are already an artist. Do you have any like, magical powers?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, I heard autistic people are really good at math. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Well not all the stereo- some of that sounds like stereotypes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[talking over Chris]'' ...it has to do with mental ability; I mean, what's the...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean I don't know- I mean I'm not saying that I'm a total genius. I mean I know- I know enough to get by.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What's the highest level of math you've taken Chris?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> College level.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I mean like algebra, or calculus or...?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. I believe I just did trigonometry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Very impressive.<br />
<br>[long pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So I was wondering. When did you get the CAD degree? I figured it's like a fine arts degree or something? I mean wha-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I designed a whole- I designed buildings and machinery and such along there. I designed the whole CWCVille shopping center.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don't you have a job then?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Your fans would love to see that Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' -I mean use that to design like, actual buildings? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I think I just told you I designed the CWCVille sho-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I don't mean in your comic. I'm just saying-<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde Isn't Popular And Chris Should Program===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well it's a good st-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So I heard you got some nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'll be putting an update on da YouTube soon, but not right now. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking maybe you could like, you know, get a degree in game design and make the Sonichu game? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah man, it's not that hard to learn programming. C++ man.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">''Falsion:'''</font> Clyde, he hates you, why are you talking?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm just giving him some advice, I mean C++ is-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you here? We don't like you. You totally ruined Chris's life.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't ruin his life. He ruined his own life.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yes you did. You've ruined his life. You raped his girlfriend. <br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks at once over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If he was the man he said he was, he'd have gone to Nintendo, made all that money. How- how are you going to make money now Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Time will tell.<br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks again]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, time will tell Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font>''[unclear]'' -need a plan, you know? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking uh, if- uh- would you be interested in getting a degree in game design. Making the game or something? Like if you had to? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Maybe but uh- I still have things to sort out in my real life.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah it's kinda unfortunate what happened with the Nintendo thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah- hang on a second, I'll be right back. Mm- ''[clattering]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So be honest guys am I really that much of a bother. I mean...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah you kind of are.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like a total dickfart.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You realize weed causes cancer? <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I didn't know that. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> And it causes the munchies. You're gonna get fat, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's okay, man, because I work out.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Do you play Guitar Hero standing up?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I play Guitar Hero while on the treadmill. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Will the Sonichu game be a- ''[muffled]'' -or a Wii one?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> It be a Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Wii would like to play. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh. I only got a DS. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I heard you are very good at HTML. Why don't you make a HTML Sonichu game? That would be awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't think you can make a game in HTML.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A- anyway I came back...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hey, Chris? How many courses did you have to take to get that degree in CAD? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -pretty sure you can make a game in HTML-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[speaking over]'' I'm took abo- took about two- took about two years to four years. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, if you can write HTML you can write C++, make your own games. Pretty simple man. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well it's something I'll consider. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde why are you talking to him? He hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm trying to give him some suggestions. I'm not insulting him, OK? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> HTML seems kinda outdated, so to speak. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font>I learn- I took two HTML classes so at least I know how to do- at least I know the ins and outs when it comes to like, workin' on it in the raw data- in the notepad.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> So you don't use Dreamweaver?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I also use Net- also use Netscape composer. <br />
<br>''[Someone starts singing 'Dreamweaver']''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I heard they went bankrupt or something.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't- I don- I don't listen to news because I don't care about bad news. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But that's not bad news that's just safety...<br />
<br>''[Talking over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why you gotta bring this bad vibe in here? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> OK OK I'll chill, I'm sorry it's just my wife- ''[can't hear over Chris typing extremely loud]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris you don't hear about these ones in a while. Like yesterday some guy in my town got run over by a train and he- he died. And that's a really bad thing, you know but you have to hear about it. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yeah but that's because you're Mexican. You Mexicans always play around the train tracks, what's with you? <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No come on, don't be racist.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> It's because Mexicans are stupid. I'm surprised I can use a computer. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' CrassCrab why do you have to be so mean?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> 'Cause my mother was raped by a Mexican. And I'm part Me- ''[muffled]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry man.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> That isn't fair to take it out on every other Mexican out there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His rule applied to millions. Just ignore him.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No I'm not my mother was raped by Mexicans.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> CrassCrab I'm tired of listening to you, get out of here. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Not all Mexicans are like that we- we- I am a nice Mexican guy. Not all Mexican guys are- ''[drowned out by typing]'' -Black guys are the people you should fear.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't get me started on them. But that will be another day. Cause I'm sick of hearing bad news.<br />
<br />
===Chris Types Fast (And Hates Hex-Box)===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris what are you uh- typing there?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm typing a email. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> How many words can you type? How fast can you type? Sounding fast there. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhh say about uh- sorta between thirty and a hundred. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's quite a good range man. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like "The Flash", minus the red jump-suit.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh Chris um- I was wondering- ''[unclear]'' -would it be uh a Wii game or a DS game or both. I only own DS and I don't have any money for a Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[overlapping]'' Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wii, DS and Pla- hopefully uh- possibly uh, PlayStation 2 or 3. Never on [[Hex_Box|Hex-Box]]. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> When you gonna do this shit?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Why don't you like the Hex-Box? I mean I have an Xbox, I would love to play online with you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'd like to say this. Before Chris says anything about that I just wanna say that today my wife came home from the mall shopping for her usual clothes, that Gucci purse I had to buy for her. You know what she came home with? I wanted a PS3 but you know what she gave me was a frickin' Xbox 360. The Elite one? ''[someone speaks over]'' I know, I kept telling her like "Honey this isn't what I wanted. I wanted the PlayStation 3 so I can play LittleBigPlanet, Metal Gear Solid and Sonic Unleashed" <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You can put Sonic Unleashed on the Hex Box as well as Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Too whiny to make out]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Nintendo just- rejected your offer? Cause I- I heard a rumor that there was going to be a Sonichu game or something. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris uh. Cassie wants you to send her your Wii number so she can talk to you on the Wii. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright uhhhhh. I'll get- have to get my Wii number now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Send it to her in an email please.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they completely hate Sony. And they hate Microsoft as well. I mean this guy, Reggie? He always talks about kicking their ass and stuff. He's kinda crazy. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I know. Reggie's very mean he never brought out ''[unclear]'' to America. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah I wanted to play that game.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talked over]'' -I'm tellin' you guys. Reggie's just a great ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Like what?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can- I can't say anything OK but... you'll see. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah so I don't think like if you got the deal with Nintendo I don't think they'd put it on like mu- like anything else but the Wii or DS. Yeah, cause that Reggie guy he frickin' hates Sony. And Microsoft. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font>Wasn't he also the head of VH1?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or Pizza Hut.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. What are your favorite places to eat at? <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember um he ''[unclear]'' -but before that he was with Sega when Dreamcast was out. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yup. Let me type this email please. I mean y'all keep talking I'll just listen. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's no reason to hate the Xbox. Let's be honest.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or um- Chris um- do you wanna release your game on Nintendo and on Sony. If you do talk to somebody like EA or something, you can like do um- multi-console thing like a (?) party thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[busy typing]'' Hmm. Well it's all to think about. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I mean Sega does third party now so um- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah well I'm gonna keep typing this email here. Y'all keep talking. <br />
<br>''[Sound of Chris typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's true, it's true. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Chris I wanted to tell you that Cassie's going to be here any- any second so you can talk to her. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Hm. ''[continues typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Don't you care about her? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[annoyed]'' I'm typin' da email to her right now! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah um 360 is pretty bad um- it red-rings all the time. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> I've had mine over two years. The same one. And it has not red-ringed yet. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Dude you have to pay $50 just so you can play online. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[echoing]'' Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah it's bullshit.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah it's totally free on PlayStation. And Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris. Chris. No, no, no, no, I gotta talk about this. [long pause] Chris...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupting]'' I get less connection problems myself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can't let you get away with this Chris. You spent over $1000 on the PlayStation Network. OK? And you say you can't afford $50 for the Xbox? Terrible reason. That's a terrible reason. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, um, Cogs I had a friend of mine whose red-ringed a lot of times. She did not like it at all. She got herself a PS3 instead. <br />
<br>''[Chris is STILL typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I heard that like- the PS triple eats up a lot of energy and like- has like- burned houses down. Cause it messes up the- no but the PS3 really- <br />
<br>''[More of Chris typing then audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So when's the next comic coming out Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I can't say. I don't have a date for it right now. I've been busy with the- with real life and such. You know getting the s- getting the website back up and all that. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh but I've been waiting so long. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I gotta tell you something Chris. ''[unclear]'' -to the trolls but I haven't done anythin' myself. It's run off into splinter groups doin' stuff to you. Ever since the Panda thing, I haven't done anything to you man. Everybody's been running round doing things. I have no control anymore. So I'm back here. This is why I'm back here. Do you understand? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. I hear you.<br />
<br />
===Nudes On YouTube===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I hear you got some uh- nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> What? <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hear you got some nudes on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> NUDES!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> That's what I thought- I have nothing na- I have nothing like that on the nu- on the YouTube. I've nothing like that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh someone posted the pics form the ED page. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> They're just tryin' ta get on- they're just tryin' ta get on my nerves again. But I'm not gonna let 'em.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Did you take those pictures or what? Where'd they come from?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Uh, are they Photoshopped?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah most of- Yes. Most of them are Photoshopped.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I can help you with ED. Chris I can help you with ED.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You can see the neck and the body doesn't quite match up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, Chris. Cassie's just arrived. She's a little nervous about talking to you, but she's gonna talk to you soon. Is that OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I just got one quick comment. The ED people were in contact with me, but I've lost contact with them. But I know you can delete that page permanently. I'm tryin' to help you man. You can get that page down forever. Even the entire site. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What, after you raped uhm- Sarah? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I'm trying to make amends. So let me do my business. All right?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's too late to make amends. Look what you did. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um. Cogsdev said she had a look at the data, they have it up in Image editing software.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah. Well...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I don't know what to tell you there. <br />
<br>''[Several trolls speak at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Doesn't that mean they're real? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I don't think so. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You don't think so?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Well, did you take them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Then where did those pictures come from? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who took those?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I don't know. And I'd rather not talk about that anymore. It's making me feel uncomfortable.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Are you lying to your fans Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> We don't feel confort- we don't feel comfortable. We're big fans of your work and we don't like being lied to. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I'd like to make a point. It might just be a doppelganger [sic].<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, you know the thing I hate most is lies. I like to spread the truth about you Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You say you're honest, but you're lying to us.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[clearly annoyed]'' Fine, fine. Some those pictures are real. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Some of them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Some of them but not all of them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Like, which ones aren't real?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'd rather not go into detail because I'd rather not look at 'em. Cause uh- ''[interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' -are you ashamed of it?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Do you not like to look in the mirror?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You owe it- you owe it to your fans.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, but- yeah, but- yeah, but upon looking at those it's like ref- it's like reflecting a pe- uh p- a past moment in my life where I- I was played for the fool. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah, by the man in the pickle suit?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh that guy- I hate that guy.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah I saw- he was trolling some other people you know? So you're not alone, Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he took pictures of me like that too...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That guy's an asshole, I hate him.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhhh yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He took pictures of my wife too. Sick bastard. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[I think she says he is a peanut]''<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br>[another pause]<br />
<br />
===Chris Hates Harry===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I just uh- never was fond of it. Ever since it came out, I was never fond of it. ''[unclear as troll speaks over]'' -just like I hate Harry Potter because he's s- he's goin- he's uh- in compe- was in competition against the world of Pokemon. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Well that- that doesn't make sense. But they're two different medias. Pokemon-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah but- yeah but still he-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> -Harry Potter is a book.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah but he poses as competition against them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> That's not really competition. I mean- <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talks over Jack]'' Oh that reminds me about books- Vivi- Vivian wrote a book and sent it to you. You never read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes. I am afraid I- yeah, yeah- I'm uh- I've been uh- so I've been under uh- too much stress between internet and all that. I'll ge- I'll read it, I'll read it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's been waiting for your response for quite a long time.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I like the cover. (pause) Nice cover.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he is right about that. That is a nice cover. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah the book is pretty good- I read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Well I- I will definitely make it a point to uh- read it. Very soon. <br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Audible over the others]'' Did you ever read Twilight?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I've heard th- I've heard Twilight and I've seen the trailer but I haven't seen the movie, I'll wait for it to come out DVD or Blu-ray.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br />
===Random Access Humor Python Style===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh OK, I heard a lot of girls like Twilight. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I see. Hey Polly does your voice sound like that, 'cause it sounds like [[BlueSpike|a guy talking falsetto]]. I mean no personal offense. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> That's not very nice...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm sorry. Believe me I didn't mean any pe- anything personal it's just like, you know- hm- kind- just kinda takes me by surprise a bit, that's all.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I knew a girl like that in high school.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Sounding upset]'' I can't help it if I'm born like this.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I'm- I'm- I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah she's a girl. I saw her pics. She's a girl.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I'll s- I'll take his word for it. I'm sorry I cu- I accused you there.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um. OK. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You know, aut- I mean- let's- it's just uh- you know it's uh- you know it's uh a bit- just a spot of fun. [[Random-access_humor|Stupid humor]]. Monty Python's Flying Circus. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> We know you love that. There's just so many references to it in the comic. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah I d- after they put all of the entire series on PlayStation Network I downloaded the Hamlet episode- that was the one that had uh- Jimmy Hill parodying himself. It also had this funny bit where it was like, you know- ''[in a stupid voice]'' "...and now it's time for The Robinsons, an everyday story about blah-de-blah-de-blah-de-blah. Dum-de-dum-de-dum-de-duhhh-dum-de-dum"- and so on...<br />
<br>''[A troll begins to speak but is interrupted by a very high-pitched Chris]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> "Morning Mrs. Robinson- Morning Mrs. Robinson. Comin' out shoppin'? Oh- you've been shoppin', what did you buy? What's this?-" 'What did you buy this for?'[Trolls laugh over him]'' -It was a bargain!"<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I've heard you do that before. I don't know where. Anyway uh- uhm- Whatever happened to Jimmy Hill? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I haven't heard from him in a long time so just assuming uh- he gave up or uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I think he got a- I think he got a, uh- children's TV program in England.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well he ain't botherin' me, so I'm not worried about him anymore.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Ye- but he's stealing Sonichu. Bastardizing it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah he did but uh- he s- but haven't seen any updates on his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' -profile, he's still doing it.<br />
<br>''[Several trolls talk over each other about him having a TV show]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Fails At Spanish Pt. 2===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' <br />
<br>''[Troll says something more about the TV show, but it's muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wants to say hi. Just forgive her English because she can't speak very well, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> All right. Just sent her the email by the way, just now. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Hey, Chris. It's me, Cassie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi, Cassie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Fine, and you?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm feelin' OK. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Why haven't you emailed me? I was really about-was really worried about you. What's happened? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry. I be- I've bee- I've been busy with the Internet and the stress and all that. I sent ya an email just now go- it's got my Wii number in it so you can add me to your contacts. I've been talking to uh- I've been talking to Sarah lot- quite a bit lately. She's been helping me with uh- updating the Sonichu site, since I've uh- since I'm working on uh- it's re-uploading and such. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Kay, I believe you. I going to check ''[pronounced like 'sheg']'' it, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You're going to where?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[very quietly]'' Check it.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> To check it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> To "shag-it"? Is that the-<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Check the email. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[still doesn't understand]'' Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> I going to check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, check email. ''[Laughs]'' Yeah I'm sorry I tr- I tried to uh- understand but it just kind of messed up a little bit. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don- why don't you two speak in Spanish?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhh. I'm not exactly fluent. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ¿Sabes hablar español, Chris? (Do you know how to speak Spanish?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí, hablo español. (Yes, I speak Spanish)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Oh. ''[pause, one of the trolls says something to her]'' Oh, eso es muy sexy. (That is very sexy.)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Ohhhh. Te gusta. Te gusta muchísimo, (You like it. You like it a lot)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> La verdad, si. (To tell you the truth, yes)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Me amos mis amigas muchísimas. Sons muy bueñas! (I love my friends (feminine) a lot. They are very good.) [Correction: Amo a mis amigas muchísimo. Son muy buenas.] <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Oh, eso es tan cool en español! Muy bueno! (That's so cool in Spanish! Very good)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Muy bueño (very good)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Aha, exacto. (it is!)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]'' Okay, that's good. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Well, I going down, okay?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Okay, you're going down- by the way, let me ask ya Cassie, do you ever- you've uh- you've actually met uh Sarah May in person, haven't you? <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Not. She's on Internet.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Okay. That's cool- but anyway uh- you got- you d- you have my Wii number, uh- you can reply the email with your Wii number and it'll be registered on the Wii network. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[very haltingly]'' Yes. So. Cool. Talk with you Chris. You are so cool. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Heh. Uhhhh. You flatter me. Tú me flatteray. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[Weak laugh]'' Well, see you. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[In his 'baby voice']'' Adiós. ''[sigh]'' <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós, bebé.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós, chiquita bonita. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>[Pause as audio cuts out]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -it again. <br />
<br>[Another pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So anyway, Chris. I've been working on Rabbichoso for a day and uh- I was just wonderin' like, it's- it's supposed to compete with the Sonichu, you know? If you weren't aware of that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhhh. I grabbed onto d- grabbed onto g I- grabbed onto the... that gist. I'm aware- I'm aware of the gist of the theory. Uh. I'm aw- I'm aware that you're- that you're tryin' to compete. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know what competition does. It's drives uh- it drives consumer interest- Well that's why you know- It's great. You have to compete with high quality things. ''[muffled]''- that's why I'm trying to help. You know, compete. Just so you're aware of this, OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I see. -see. <br />
<br>[Pause]<br />
<br />
===Rabbichoso And Animu===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris we've been ge- been getting uh threatening images from the Pickle Man. Did you s- did you see the left? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I've not heard from the Pickle Man in lo- in a long time. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Apparently there are multiple ones because this one is, uh, not a darkie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh-huh. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> It's good that they're leaving you alone now. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Seems like they found more easier targets. Seeing as how you became [[Navy|saltier]].<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh. You know I originally got that line- quote from an e- ep- episode of ExCel Saga. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> From what?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> ExCel Saga.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Oh, ExCel Saga. Oh, yeah, that's a good anime.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> AIII I-Falazzo! (''He means [[ScotPalazzo|Il-Palazzo]]'')<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, have you ever seen two animes, ''[muffled]'' and Schooldays?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I have not seen either of those. I like Steel Angel Kurumi as well.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, how much Japanese do you know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only a little bit. I'm not totally fluent. I can say that with all honesty. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something unintelligible, not quite Japanese]''<!-- It sounds like he's saying "You say you can't- can you speak with me?" in CHINESE. --><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Huh?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Never mind, you won't understand it.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[unclear] Chris-Chan. Genki desu-ka?''<br />
<br />
===Chris Could Kill Clyde===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, I just wanted to say, uh, you're doing a good job, like, keeping calm even though Clyde is here. I mean u- I thought you'd be, like, more angry at him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm being calm with you guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> -I would have been choking him by now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I'd have kicked his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Preach to the choir. Pr- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I'd make him choke on a pickle if it were up to me.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You guys can't touch me otherwise I'd kick all your asses. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, bring it.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris could kick Clyde's ass anytime.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Let's see Chris do it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Bring it to me any day of the week and I'll definitely show him a hard- day's night. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah I think you could kick his ass.<br />
<br>[Trolls and Clyde talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Sings]'' -been a hard day's night...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -never mind, just...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean that as a- meant that as in I would beat... him up. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Kick his ass?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm very strong. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. I'm gonna see you later, OK?<br />
<br>''[Unison of goodbyes]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> OK see ya. Thank you so much Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[ignoring his fans]'' Yeah I can- I can lift about my weight. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Like um- if Clyde were right in front of you, what would you do to him?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Like, what kind of style of fighting do you have?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, shut up.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I gotta know my competition. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Personal- in the physical offense. ''[sigh]'' I would definitely be giving you so much physical pain. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's not a s- that's not a style. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I would beat you up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He deserves it man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, that's still not a style...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He uses fisticuffs. He's a gentleman. Gentleman fisticuffs. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Whatever, I'll just see-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Stop arguing and just-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ''[Over previous troll]'' I mean, if he did that to my sweetheart I'd fucking kill him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well. He's not- he's not going to come over and kill me, I know that. He doesn't have the money. [pause] You know I'm surprised that you're mad here. You're much kinder in person I thought you- Now I'm just expecting you at my door anytime, just waiting for you to stand here with an axe or something. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Knives are too messy. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Ah, now a sword- sword's are usually better.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What about poison?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Poison's good, poison's good.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde, what- do you want him to beat your ass?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I was just expecting it, you know.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, you know what's another thing? I would definitely not tell you how I would be hurting you, but I would definitely give you a who- big amount of pain. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, he's gonna keep you guessin'!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he deserves it. After everything he's done-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Muffled by troll]'' -going to kill me, I'd like to know. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I'm just going to let you cover in- worry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh so you're never going to show up, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Oh yes I will show up. But you just won't be expecting it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't even know where I live, do you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Find out!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Maybe I should give you my address. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, you should track him down and kick his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> But I'm going to leave you guessing too...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Defend Panda's h- Panda's honor.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, hi Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> 'sup Julie.<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br>''[Everyone talks over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde's A Dick===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I notice her mic doesn't work. But still I'm just letting her know that- acknowledge her presence. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're doing well staying calm even though Clyde's here.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, Clyde's a total dick.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Fucker.<br />
<br>''[Rustling]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I mean, he's taken over everything. The IRC. This. I can't- no one can stop him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' -over there, so...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll:'''</font> I- I like Rabbichoso.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Of course you do. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll''':</font> It's funny. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I will not offer any new comment on it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, OK. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, when can we expect the next Sonichu to be released.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, we've been eager.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It'll be soon. It will be soon.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah just ignore Clyde man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean if you're going to put a hard date on it, you'd better deliver your promise. If you don't, I'll strike harder. That's all I'm saying.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. You're saying if I don't set a date, you're gonna...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no. I'm saying don't make promises you can't keep. Don't make promises you can't keep.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He'll choke you with his medallion bitch!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who the hell do you think you are?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I agree with Cogs over there. Maybe you should do just a page a day, not release all at once. Keep his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you telling him this when he hates you?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm giving him suggestions man, OK? OK?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Only thing he's gonna suggest to you is 'shut the fuck up'!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, seriously man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It's alright. <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Penny Arcade's slow.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh you mean like Penny Arcade or ''[unclear]'' or MegaTokyo?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they're just like- boring. Then they because sellouts. <br />
<br />
===Chris's Country Cookin===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Chris, where's your favorite place to eat?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. Can't really say uh- but I like country cookin'. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> What's country cooking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh no G's in the sto- no G's in the name by the way, no G. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah what's country cooking? I'm not familiar with that.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's like uh- som- something like Golden Corral. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But Golden Corral is a national franchise.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh Chris, how are your parents?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> They're OK.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br>[Long pause]<br />
<br />
===Sex Is Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I've got a sug- another suggestion. Now be quiet all of you cause I know you hate me. Just- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, Chris hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well don't defend him. He can defend himself OK? He's a man. But whatever-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let him speak.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm suggesting that- you go on and on about this sex stuff but you've never gotten laid, have you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I like to put myself in the imaginative situation that I'd like to be in and the sexual stimulation. So I can be ready for [[ego|myself]] for when I do actually have my first time.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well my first time was- I'll just say that it's terrible, OK? I didn't know what I was doing, she didn't know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let me guess, you prematurely ejaculated?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no, it's not like that you don't know what to do. Every woman's told me OK? You can't prepare-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Clyde]'' First time's always awkward...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -I learnt that mistake a while back, OK whatever. OK, you just- you can't prepare for your first time. You might as well just have a really bad first time so you learn from your mistakes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm not trying to defend Clyde or anything, but yeah it's kinda true. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Hmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The girl I first fell in love with is the girl I'm married to right now. Samantha just changed my world. But marriage does get boring.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Tips To STAY STRAIGHT===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I know how you say how important it is to stay straight, um- I'm having trouble staying straight, do you have any suggestions?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Watch a bunch of pornography with uh- with naked women. OK, a lot of naked women.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That happened to me one time...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, I have this friend I play video games with, is that gay? He's male by the way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry could you- I'm sorry could you repeat that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I have this guy I'm friends with he always comes over to my house to play video games. Is that gay? I'm kinda scared. You know? I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Hmm. Is he making any advances towards you? Personally. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I dunno how to tell. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Like uh sit- does he always sit next to you when he's playing games. Playing video games.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Yeah he usually does. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I see. Hmm. My- well- my suggestion in that case, would be to keep a heavy distance between you and that guy. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he meant anything gay by it though. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he means anything like- gay about it. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well, still- it's always best to find out- you can ask him. Don't be afraid to ask him. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> What would you do in this situation?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well if he said yes then I would uh- basically- let me think about that a moment. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you have any friends who're are like, guys?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only acquaintances and only a few of them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you play video games with people or anything? Do they come over to your house?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. No.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I remember-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> ''[Cuts Polly off]'' I'm just worried I might be gay or something. I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You probably are Falsion, but that's OK. No, look dude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Leave him alone! Leave him alone! He's straight!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Why?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Hey, let's have a calm conversation here. Let's not have any fights.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br>''[Trolls speak over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I've been reading the Sonichu comics and man, they are page-turners! Seri- I was on- I was on the edge of my seat for a while. I ju- I couldn't- I couldn't- you know. Just had to read and read.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Thank you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, can I be your friend? I know I'm a guy. I don't mean anything gay by it. Can I be your friend? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. I dunno. <br />
<br />
===A Wild Snorlax Appears===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Do you want any hotdogs?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I'm OK. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> No?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I was talking with my mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I was wondering if I could be your friend.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I h- heard you only like, you only like to be acquaintances. With guys. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, ummm. Let's just pretty much leave it at acquaintance. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hello Mrs. Chandler. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> She can't hear you, I'm wearing my earphones.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Listen, I'm not gay. I don't- you know- yeah. Never mind.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I mean- I mea- I-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What do you have against gay people? I'm serious to hear this. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's just unnatural and it's against God's will. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, it's not like it's a choice. You can't change who you are like- you're a creative guy but I mean they're just gay. They can't change that. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm just answering a few questions mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You don't have to answer. Nobody's payin' you to do that.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yes they are.<br />
<br>''[shuffling sounds, clanging]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> It ain't none of their business no-way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I wouldn't be asked questions like that by employers or anybody. Don't tell people what you d- what you think. Keep that to yourself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris what's hap- what's happening?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, obviously, my mother is offering her input.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Tell her you're just talking to some friends. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' I don't need no back talk from somebody on the other end of the phone.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear you, Mom. Hmm. Hmm. <br />
<br>''[scraping sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> These- these idiots don't have any brains or- they don't have any idea this way or that.<br />
<br>''[more banging, clanging and tumbling sounds. Sounds like washing up]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Is right now a bad time right now? I mean-<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Pixelblocks, Pixelblocks!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Someone's saying "Pixelblocks." <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you saying [[Pixelblocks]]?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>''[Chris's mom has been singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful singing voice, Chris.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[Audio cuts back in]'' -all the anxiety, causing you stress.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, well sometimes they don't; they can be peaceful.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Well, your mom and dad get the crappy end of the stick.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm, a lot of us do.<br />
<br>''[more clattering sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Yeah, just like this nasty mess over here that you guys left that I got to clean up.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm. ''[Audio cuts]'' -Yeah, I took care of my bills. I mean, not completely, but I took care of them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> What about going to, uh, Redmond?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> We! (Wii?) <br />
<br>[unintelligible, windows beeps]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[laughing]'' Yeah, sweetheart pool.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Mmhmm. ''[laughing]'' Like the other side of the pillow.<br />
<br>''[someone sighing. Clanging noises return after short absence]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' ...is all, I mean, living with your parents is okay bad-in today's bad economy, but at 26, come on. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Shut up, you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I'm being nice.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde isn't so bad a guy. He does bad things, but he's pretty cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah he's reformed. He's seen the error- Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How- how could he do that to Sarah? I mean- That's not right.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah. Well, that's like Luke... That's like Luke and Laura from General Hospital. I know that's like, before y'all's time, but, um... Luke was a rapist and she-he raped Laura and then, like, a few months later they get married. So... ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, I believe Clyde was trying to make amends from his past actions.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, but Chris, can you uh- can you forgive him?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Random Troll:'''</font> ''[whispering]'' White whale, holy grail! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Can you forgive a small-dicked Asian? Just a thought.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He's not Asian! <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm half-Asian, okay? My parents ''[unclear]'' I don't really wanna go into it. It's too bo-boring for you people. But this is why I ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you there? Just makin' sure, buddy.<br />
<br>''[clattering]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Move out.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Another Troll''':</font> Well, how do I do that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi there, my kitty. ''[In baby voice]'' Yes, there's a pretty kitty.<br />
<br>''[Someone speaking with a voice-synth]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hang on a second. I've got, like, a thousand different... Oh, Crass, why'd you do that?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Because. You can unban him but, yeah. I'm not gonna friggin' stand for that. <br />
<br>''[Sound of a vacuum cleaner]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> I (m j d?) do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I heard the "g" word.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um, is that a vacuum cleaner?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Yeah, sounds like it is.<br />
<br>[Trolls speak but are drowned out by vacuum]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ...room or something.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I think the vacuum cleaner... <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If that's the government trying to do some kind of thing, then my name's Rusty Shackleford.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's a loud fan.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I have a fan above my stove, too.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Hey... I do, too.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Wait- wha- wait. You-you-you're in the kitchen? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Me too.<br />
<br>''[possibly Sonic game sound effects]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmhm? Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I'm pretty sure it's already asked, but I didn't catch the answer. When can we expect the next Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I-I-I told you my suggestion of releasing a page a day or something. I mean, it's a pretty good one. It-it-it allows for a good time. Finish a page a day. You upload it. You know? It's very good. Works very well.<br />
<br>''[Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh. I mean- you guys keep asking when he's going to finish it but I wonder how many pages are going to be in the new one? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> The last one was like, thirty. Just release it over the span of a month. Works fine. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...go up to ninety thousand...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[mutters something]''<br />
<br>''[Sound of Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Down by the river...side.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful voice, Chris.<br />
<br>''[clattering, typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[unclear, repeating the same two phrases]'' Gone down by the river, down by the water side, down by the riverside. Down by the waterside. Down by the riverside.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember ''[unclear]''<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -I'm hungry myself.<br />
<br>''[some kind of alarm sounding]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Then go eat.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I already ate.<br />
<br />
===Anime And Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I wonder what anime Chris watches nowadays. There's not many on television but do you still watch Japanese cartoons? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[In a bad accent]'' Kawaii desu ne. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I want to watch Shuffle. He said it was very good. He said it was sad. I don't know if I wanna watch- I don't like sad stuff. I like to be happy when I watch anime.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, and um, do you watch stuff like Bleach and um Code Geass or Naruto or something?<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I'm glad to hear that Shuffle isn't sad. I'm definitely going to watch it sometime.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um, yeah Chris that was a good call on Naruto. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah there's a lot of people who don't like it much either. Too popular.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But please. Please. Hope. ''[audio cuts out briefly]'' Uh, Chris, please consider When They Cry.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Ooh, I saw that one. It was a really good series.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, I know; that was good, like- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah. Both seasons of it. <br />
<br>''[Windows beeps, voices overlapping]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I could link you to Season One if you want. Yeah, Samantha got me into that. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...you'll give it a try, Chris. It's a very, very good series.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Hm. Hey, Julie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...lots of ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Watch Shuffle. You got the six episodes of Shuffle or... Which o- which anime? I'm sorry. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh and JoJo's Bizarre Adventure is also cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I really liked JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. Very ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Za warudo!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah, I think Shuffle is quite all right. I like Heidi. She's sweet and loyal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> That's a good one. One of my favorites is Black Lagoon.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris have you ever seen La Blue Girl?<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other about different anime]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, uh, Chris can I, my, uh, I don't know if it's all right, but, like, could you like, give me an email sometime? I could, uh... recommend you to... this anime that... Polly and... Julie like to watch. They're quite- they... Oh, C-and Cogs has recommended such great anime. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[talking to his mother]'' Yeah? That's ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> As well as Julie-Julie's the person that got me into anime.<br />
<br />
===People Love Poketunes===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> -we can go into this later cause I got my headphones on. And, Mom, you know what something else? They liked your singing.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> What? I don't sing.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> That's my laugh; that's my laugh. They couldn't hear me. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They heard you. Singin'. Just now.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I can't sing!<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I'm tone deaf. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They just heard you singing, and liked your voice.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay. Did you write checks for all those bills and pack everything ''[unclear]''?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yes, Mother, I did.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You're not telling me no story?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm not telling you no story.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> OK. It's important [''inaudible''] did you pay them?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, I paid that one. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay, you have to be honest with me, 'cause, see, you're settin'...<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm being honest, I'm being honest.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> How you respond to what [we] talk about. You say you ought to something and you don't do it then that's gonna change my ideas ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay... I'll be sure to pay the remaining differences next month.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> No, this month.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I know but I couldn't pay them all with 90 dollars so there's still some left ''[sound cuts]'' ...oh, you're cooking them up here, okay, that's why you turned the fan on over the stove.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br>''[Trolls rejoice and mock Momma Chandler]''<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 1|Mumble Chat 1]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 3|Mumble Chat 3]]|}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Spanish]]<br />
==Links==<br />
*[https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBOVVDS0JtSDNvMWs Download]<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_2&diff=162996Mumble 22012-09-26T20:38:11Z<p>Irisviel: </p>
<hr />
<div>{{Articleofthenow}}<br />
[[Image:0839-MomDesi.JPG|thumb|right|180px|In Mumble 2, a Wild [[Barbara Chandler|Snorlax]] appeared.]]<br />
<br />
'''Mumble 2''' is the second [[Mumble]] chat that took place on 4 [[February 2009]]. More than an hour long.<br />
<br />
This is a more organized Q&A type chat than [[Mumble 1]]. Questions from [[Clyde]] about [[sex]] in the [[comic]] and interesting tidbits about how Chris believes sex is the same as romance. This is pretty hard hitting, with stuff like how Chris is into [[McDonald's|fast food]] yet he's against tobacco. A lot of drama involving Clyde.<br />
<br />
Length: '''1:49:17'''<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
<br />
===Notes===<br />
* Chris doesn't like Clyde because he stole his sweetheart.<br />
* Audio cuts out for a minute before Chris says: "...HYMEN!" (You broke her hymen)<br />
* Trolls claim [[Panda]] is with Clyde, Chris wants to hear her voice, they say she's busy<br />
* 'She and I WERE very close'<br />
* Chris didn't have $400-$800 to go and see Panda; claims he got this number from an airport website recommended by [[Miyamoto]]<br />
* Insists on [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] being in ''[[Animal Crossing]]''<br />
* Doesn't want to talk about his deal with them<br />
* Insists that he doesn't have to turn down his radio since his voice is louder (''it is horribly loud in the mic'')<br />
* Panda gave Clyde all of the sites, etc.<br />
* [[Sarah]] is going to be with Clyde, which Chris wants to deny<br />
* These motherfuckers keep talking over each other<br />
* Calls a troll's critique crap<br />
* [[Bubbles]] must be aroused, she isn't wet all the time<br />
* Bubbles is 90% water so does sperm just swim around forever? NO<br />
* Clyde: This is a children's comic, why so much sex?<br />
: '''Chris:''' It is romance. My best artwork is when they're making out 'romantic moments', drawn in protest to trolls. Shows that [[Rosechu]]s have vaginas, not [[duck]]s.<br />
* Admits to maybe going overboard<br />
* Trolls try to reason with him about the [[ED]] article: There wouldn't be an article if he didn't react like he does.<br />
* Trolls say that TV-Y7 means NO SEX but Chris points to romantic anime that have making out (cartoons are for kids, whatever the content).<br />
* Trolls talk about Japan being less strict about those things<br />
* Everyone gets to vote in [[CWCville]], even if they're [[Niggos|black]].<br />
* Got his idea from [[Mary Poppins]].<br />
* Troll tries to give historical background about cough medicine putting kids to sleep. Chris insists it was the lullaby that put them to sleep.<br />
* Discussion about Chris, 'gay message' sent by a troll<br />
* He calls Clyde a scoundrel<br />
* BELIEVE HIM HE IS STRAIGHT<br />
* Chris tries to speak Mexican at 20:50<br />
* Mexican speaks Mexican to him... he replies in Menglish<br />
* [[4-cent_garbage]] is located in Mexico<br />
* Someone says that he needs to improve his Mexican<br />
* Chris is against smoking, CWCville is smoke and alcohol free<br />
* Rehash of why [[tobacky]] is bad, his position on it, alcohol=bar fights<br />
* Chris's dad smoked and had several bypasses, has a pacemaker and has had heart attacks<br />
* Mention of his hair cuttings for his fans<br />
* Chris was doing math in his head, got in car crash.<br />
* Chris has taken college level math. Took trigonometry.<br />
* Trolls gang up on Clyde for stealing Panda<br />
* Time will tell when Chris will make the money he would have in the Nintendo deal<br />
* Trolls bash Clyde for his pot smoking <br />
* Chris doesn't watch news because it's bad news =(<br />
* Bashing of the Mexican<br />
* Chris can type 30 to 100 WPM, but can't type and talk at the same time<br />
* Chris says [[PSN]] is free though Clyde(?) points to the $1,000 Chris spent on PSN<br />
* Chris has been typing for 15 minutes now and it is VERY loud<br />
* Chris has been busy IRL therefore the comic release doesn't have a date<br />
* Someone points to nudes on [[YouTube]].<br />
* He does not have it on the YouTube, but he isn't going to take it anymore.<br />
* Claims some of the photos are photoshopped.<br />
* Clyde offers help to take ED page down.<br />
* Chris denies taking those pictures, doesn't want to talk about it, making him uncomfortable.<br />
* Some of the pictures are real. When questioned which ones are fake, Chris can't answer.<br />
* Chris hates Harry Potter because it was in competition with [[Pokémon]]!<br />
* Chris is too stressed to read Vivian's [[A Girl Who Brought Down the World|book]], but he likes the cover!<br />
* Polly, who has been talking the whole time is confronted by Chris who thinks she is a guy. Polly is upset. Chris apologizes.<br />
* [[Jimmy Hill]] has launched his Sonichu show<br />
* More Mexican talk at 55:10<br />
* Chris giggles and sighs happily when Cassie, another Mexican, compliments him and when she leaves he says 'Chiquita Bonita'<br />
* Rabbichoso talk (Sonichu.info)<br />
* Classic trolls are leaving Chris alone.<br />
* Chris likes Steel Angel Kurumi (''quote from [[Wikipedia:Steel Angel Kurumi|Wikipedia]]: often classified as ecchi due to the focus on fanservice and panty shots'')<br />
* Chris claims to be very strong, could beat Clyde up. Says he would show Clyde a [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force|Hard Day's Night]], and would give Clyde pain.<br />
* ShinyMarshtomp makes an appearance? Likes Rabbichoso<br />
* Chris likes to eat at [[Country Cookin]] (''like Golden Corral'')<br />
* Chris likes to imagine his first time. <br />
* Clyde says the first time is awful, Chris said it was because Clyde prematurely ejaculated<br />
* Watch porn with naked women to cure your gay<br />
* Guys sitting next to you = gay coming on to you<br />
* Falsion has been in the chat room and is afraid he is gay<br />
* A wild Snorlax appears<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
<br />
===Waiting for Chris===<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I can't wait to hear Chris! I'm a huge fan!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, goddamn these noodles are fantastic. Man, I wish I could eat like this everyday.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Have you eaten the rice balls?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no. These are noodles. These are-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Fan-fucking-tastic.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now they're all gone, it's fantastic, you know?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Sweetangie is Chris. Or, we think so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's definitely not the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm disappointed there's so many impostors out there. Kinda my fault, but, you know, if it weren't- ''[unintelligible]'' -hard to come by.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His mic was working last time he was here, just fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He usually capitalizes his words, like in every sentence.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is- I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Is it set to push to talk or something?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You better get us your email address Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah its push to talk. It's called push to talk. It's fantastic ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, just have him set it to voice activity. It works so much better that way.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Aww, he left.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> You guys are fucking idiots.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other again]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You guys scared him off by being guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, you fucking jackasses. Nice going.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Was that even the real...?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yes, that was the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He's too much of a pussy to talk.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, cause you scared him, or some- No, or he's too stupid to be.<br />
<br>''[Trolls Laugh]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Arrives===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Chris arrives, with radio playing loudly]'' Hello.<br />
<br>''[Trolls all greet him]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, now-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Why haven't you got your microphone working?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't know why my microphone [is] messed up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry, but we had an impostor here before.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm registered. I've got myself registered now. So, uh, hopefully-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> That's probably why. It had to like, uh- calibrate.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Well, I'm calibrated now.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So, Chris, have you seen Rabbichoso, it's fantastic.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't give a crap about your stupid pencil sketch.<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am not listening. I do not have to listen to ''you''.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Why, I'm not understanding [inaudible]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well for one thing,and I'll say it on here, you stole my sweetheart!<br />
<br>''[Cutout continues]''<br />
<br />
===PandaHalo, Trip to Redmond and Animal Crossing===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You broke her hymen!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I know it's a terrible mistake, but I plan to make it up to her. I'm getting married and uh- I'm doing the things I should do.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh and another thing, if she is really over there with you now, then put her on the mic. Please.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> She's not- He never said-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, Chris, she's very busy, OK. She's very busy.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's not over here right now. Okay? So lets drop it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, fine. Well could you tell her to please send me a message lettin' me know, for sure, so I can know- so I can know to-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' I'll let her know whatever you want, but it's her life. She doesn't have to send you a message. You failed her. You failed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' She and I were very close.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If you we're so close, then why didn't you go?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' Because I had- Aw, hang on a second. How do I- oh, that's right. This thing. Right. Mmm. Hold on a sec. Oh yeah, because I did not have four to eight hundred dollars!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It doesn't cost that much to go cross-country man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes it does. I know, I saw it on an airport website. Where I was be- Where I was- recommended to me by Mr. Miyamoto.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, you can drive there. It's not that hard.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened with that? I thought, um, didn't you have a deal with them or something? I heard a rumor that your characters were going to be in Animal Crossing.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, they are in Animal Crossing. And I did- and I do- I did have a deal with them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened though?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' I'd rather not say.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Radio, Clyde and Criticism===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, why don't you turn down the TV? It's hard to hear you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Annoyed sigh]'' I do not have a TV turned on in here.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I can hear it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have a radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I hear something in the background.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Burping throughout sentence]'' Well that's the- that would b- the radio. And it is not that loud.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But it shows up pretty well on your microphone mic. With due respect.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But still, my voice is louder than the radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Ah goo- ahh given.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh, Chris? Uh, when are you going to do the new Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something over Polly]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' Uh, I'll answer Polly's question. I'm not sure. It's, uh, it's in progress right now, I'm drawing it up.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I can't wait to read it!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Well, we'll see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Listen, Clyde kind of has admin on here, so we can't really do anything about him. So, yeah. I don't know.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Hard to hear over Chris's radio]'' ...with you guys. I love you guys. Just as much as Chris loves you guys. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I was angry. I was angry. But I'm calm now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't try to hurt any other person from now on.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm doing the best I can. I'm doing the best I can.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have much- I do not have much to say in response to that right now. Because I'm ticked off.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't let him get to you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're no better than he is, if you give in.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris, I just wanted to let you know I'm a huge fan of the comics, and I'm glad you keep doing what you're doing. You're doing a great job, and just keep it up, alright man?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, yeah, I appreciate the, uh, what's the word I'm looking for? The, the, uh- well, the encouraging words. Encouragement. I appreciate the encouragement. Well, there are things, uh- I- er- current events I do not appreciate. I appreciate the positive encouragement.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I can't really do anything. He took over the IRC channel. I used to be the owner. I mean Clyde. He's like taking over everything.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, it was because Panda gave it to me, you know. But anyway, I mean, you can't just listen to encouragement, you've got to listen to criticism, man. Criticisms are what make you better, you learn from your mistakes. You learn from mistakes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Be right back guys, my wife is calling.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I don't- I don't- Tons of people don't like the Rabbichoso art style, but you know, I gotta improve on that. That's something I plan to improve on. There's a lot of criticism in the death of Sonichu, right? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What? What did you just say?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a lot of criticism of Sonichu. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. For a moment there I thought you said something different.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What, what did you think I said? I'm just saying, there are people who like it and people who don't like it. You gotta start taking in those suggestions. You know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. So many things that will be improved upon. But, I just have to hear from Sarah herself that she really is going to be with you, Clyde. I have to hear it from herself. It's one thing to hear it from you and then it's- then on that note, it's just I find it very hard to believe. So I have to hear it from her.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I kinda think that Rabbichoso sucks. I mean, I think it could be funny, but it honestly looks like it's drawn by a kindergartner.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, Sonichu has evolved over the years. You can see that the art's getting better. Rabbichoso doesn't even look like something a beginner would do, honestly. I mean, ''[Interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A whole bunch of crap!<br />
<br>''[Everyone starts talking at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, Sonichu is in color.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I know, I accept his criticism. But you just called it crap! Now that's just rude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have emotions going behind me- uh, behind that opinion.<br />
<br />
===Cassie===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, did you get my message.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Aren't you going to be the gentleman, then? Aren't you gonna be the gentleman?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I just want to ask you, Chris. I'm Cassie's friend. She- she's worried sick about you. Why haven't you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did email her! As a- I- I haven't gotten any re-plies from her. I have emailed her and I have instant messaged her on A.I.M. and Skype. I haven't heard back from her. I don't know what's going on there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> ...you emailed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> When was the last time you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, hang on, I'll check.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris? I have a question. My fa- One of my favorite new characters is, um, Simonla, and like, I also like Zapina as well. Um, are they gonna have bigger parts in the series later on?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, could you repeat that question?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I was wondering if Simonla and Zapina will either have bigger parts in the series later on. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [[Sonichu_10#The_Final_Countdown|Possibly]]. Possibly, but, uh, I can't say for sure. Oh, and, uh, to answer your question, uh- in answer to, uh, I believe, uh, Screwhead, who asked? It was about four days ago. About four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Yeah. Four days ago? Okay, I'll tell her to check it out.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> The last email I sent was about four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> She'll contact you in a while, though.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I'll tell her to check it out and- and thanks Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright. Mm.<br />
<br />
===Bubbles's Pussy and Sex in the Comics===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris? I have a question.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, my favorite character is Bubbles, I kinda liked the, uh, the thing she had going with Blake, where she was kind of keeping the relationship secret. I thought that was kinda clever. I was wondering, uh, she's a water-type, so does that mean that her vagina is always wet, or does she have to be aroused like a normal woman?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, aroused. That's applied for all the, uh, Rosechus there. And also, like, you know, she's not just a water-type, she's also- she's a water- and electric-type, like uh- oh, shoot- What's the name of that one? Originated from Gold-Silver-Crystal series, uh, evolves from Chinchou? Lanturn. And she has, uh, she has Volt Absorb ability.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, Chris, another question following Bubbles. Uh, her body is 90% water, and now this thing about the whole sexual intercourse- about it. Now, don't take this rude, and you don't need to answer me... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...I totally respect your creative work. My wife actually got me into this, uh, show actually. So, what happens is- like, as you know, like, semens are like little fishes in themselves. Would that mean, I mean, would they actually have a route to fly into the egg, in theory, or do they just swim around her whole body, just forever just swimming around.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. The, uh, the internal or- the internal organs uh, for the Rosechus are pretty much the same thing, so I'd say pre- about, uh, as good chance as most any other mammal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, so you mean she's able to control her density a little bit more. She- I understand now. She's able to control more her density from the 90% water. Okay. That pretty much answers it just perfectly. That's been bothering me at work. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I got another question, Chris, about this whole sexual thing. I mean, this is a children's comic, right? Why is there so much sex in it?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. It's called romance, and my- and my- if you'll notice throughout the comics my best pieces of artwork among which were those where dey were kissing and making out. Romantic moments.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a hidden page-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' And because- and because- and because of the tension from, uh, the trolls and Encyclopedia Dramatica, I just felt like doing that in protest against them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, but childre-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' Yes but how is that really a protest? That, you know, you know, are, are you like referencing to the 60's when women burned their bras? That was in protes- That was feminism. Saying that they weren't slaves to men. Do you even understand the whole thing?<br />
<br>''[Multiple voices are heard at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Now, to tell you the truth, I never really thought about, I never really thought about that when I-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Chris]'' Then how is, stripping was, how was that protest-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Jack]'' It shows that they have vaginas and NOT dicks. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well you know the dick thing was the fact that they were just, you know, mocking you. I think you went overboard with that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well maybe I did. Maybe I did. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, you did, because that seems kind of excessive, kind of-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' I don't think they would have even bothered to write about an article about you if you didn't just keep reacting like that.<br />
<br />
===Chris justifies sex in a kids' comic===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I have another question.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The point some of us are trying to make is, if it's TV-Y7 that means there should really be no sex in it at all.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible over other people]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's pretty much incorrect, I mean, uh, there's so many romantic anime that's TV-Y7, and they shoul- they have making out.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, a lot of things in Japan, Japan has stricter standards-not stricter, I mean looser guidelines than America. It's much different.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear ya.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I was just wondering what Bubbles, um, she has a, that water whirlwind attack, I was just curious if you had any plans to make- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Butting in]'' By the way, that was a Whirl- Whirlpool.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font>Yeah, Whirlpool, sorry, sorry, Whirlpool, but do you have any plans to mix an, uh, Electric-type attack with that, since water conducts electricity, right? It could be a very powerful-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah, she did, she did an electric attack amongst the- the walls of that Whirlpool and she let out. In case you didn't know, there's a- little bits of lightning bolts among which-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, oh, I'm sor- I didn't notice that, I'm sorry, I'll go take another look. Thank you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hey Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> You make some pretty sweet Little Big Planet levels.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you.<br />
<br />
===Chris on Benadryl babysitting===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, there's a message from Cogs on the side, it's about, uh, do women not have the right to vote already in CWCville.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, evry- Everybody, no matter what age, no matter what gender or race, everybody has the right to vote in CWCville. Even if they're black.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Then what's up with the "Votes for Women" thing, I was-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Not just vote women, but- ''[interrupted]'' any other ethnicities, and gays?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't understand-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did that- heard it in Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What? Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, man, Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, yeah, that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's a classic. It's my favorite movie of all time.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that movie was, like, based in the 1900s.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but still I- still I agreed with that message there-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Taken out of context, that makes it seem like CWCville's set in the 1960s.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What message? That children should be given cough medicine so they'll go to sleep?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''What?''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that's what women used to do back in- That's what mothers, friggin' nurses and stuff used to do to kids in the 1900s, is give children, like, you know, cough medicine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Cause- cause the medicine- uh, correction, the medicine did not put them to sleep, there was a lullaby, not the cough medicine. They only had to take the cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ...because it rained, before dere, and it was not, and it was to, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Rain means cough medicine doesn't have anything to do with each other. That's not how friggin' germs are spread, or colds are gotten. Colds are gotten through germs, not the rain.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How is cough medicine any different from today's parents that just let their kids watch TV until they fall asleep? I mean, it's just as bad.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well- Cough medicine has a lot to do with the psychological effects of it. Obviously if you get- if you keep giving fre-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Thanks, Samantha, that was delicious.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's my, uh, Samantha-<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, that's we're all saying, cause I've heard that there's a lot of different chemicals in cough medicine. You could pick up a ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I don't even take cough medicine, because I'm not a pussy.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Anyway, I never put any references, I never did any references or plan any references to cough medicine or anything of that sort.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Well, Chris, Cassie says the last e-mail she got from you was on the 17th. How 'bout your being gay? Is that true?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[sigh]'' That wa- That was somebody had- That was Clyde hacking through my e-mail and spammed that to my contacts.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, I definitely did not do that-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You're a scoundrel-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -a slanderous lie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I did not do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Whoa-whoa-whoa. Wow. Well, thanks for that. She was worried that you were- that you don't like her.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> You're a scoundrel, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't do that. That was someone else.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I was wondering, because I've heard other news too, I was really hoping that you weren't gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Believe me, I'm straight.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I'll take your word for it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you. And, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Cogs- Cogs got a way- she showed us that, okay? I mean, you only ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br />
===Chris's fail-riffic Spanish===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So, Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, Screwhead's from Mexico. I heard you like Spanish, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hola, Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You know Spanish, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí. Conoso Mexico. Tomé dos años ''[unclear]'' mi escuela secundaria. (Yes, I know Mexico. I took two years [in, possibly] my secondary school.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has venido en Mexico? (Have you come to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, lo siento? (Uh, I'm sorry?)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has estado en Mexico? (Have you been to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Estoy Mexico? No. (I am Mexico? No.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[slowly]'' Has estado, um, in Mexico. Has venir? (Have you been to Mexico? Have gone?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Uh, no, I hav- no, no tengo pansars. ''[sic]'' (no, I don't have pansars (?))<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I think, uh, I think I meant to say- I'm pretty sure-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Did you just say you don't wear pants?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, no, I was trying to say, ah, I don't have plans to go in Mexico at the moment.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's what I understood what he was saying there.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, did you know that, that 4-cent garbage website is located in Mexico?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> That's why-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, that's why they can't get it shut down.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]'' borders, plus it's cheaper to run sites over there; they have, like, several servers.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wanted to talk to you, but she couldn't make it here, well, and, she wants to be your Spanish teacher, because she says that you've got room to improve your Spanish.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Oh, that Cassie. Yeah, I'm sorry, I thought you were- I got mixed up. Um... Yeah, um, I'm sorry, I, uh, I haven't talked to that- I haven't talked to Cassie in a while, but I've been mostly talking to, uh, her gal- her, uh, gal-pal and I'm sure- I'm sure she'd tell you a lot about her...<br />
<br />
===In which the trolls discuss bar fights===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey Chris, how- how does Sonichu keep Rosechu from spending more than a hundred dollars at the mall? I've always wondered how he could manage to do that. I've always had problems with that myself.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That wa- That time at the mall, it was, uh, Kel loaned the credit card. And it's like, yeah- she gave- she gave Sonichu the responsibility of that credit card. She did.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I've always given my advice on cannabis, you should do the ''[unintelligible]'', Cogs Chris, but I think she wants your response.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, one of my friends sent me this picture, and I think you might find it kinda disturbing just because they say it's proof that you're gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Aw yeah, I saw that, that's just a crappy Photoshop.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No, that one doesn't- this one doesn't look Photoshopped at all.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'm not gonna look at it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Oh, you're not? Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, uh, you say you're against smoking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. As a matter of fact, CWCville is a smoke-free, non-alcoholic city.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[partially drowned out]'' That's what we call a totalitarian state...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, and, uh, in the pilot episode with Seth MacFarlane, of, you know, Family Guy? He's always smoking. What do you think about that?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Go smoke.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I just- I just take that with a grain of salt, and, uh, you know, that's what-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, if he can smoke, why can't anyone else? I mean, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Because it causes cancer!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> So does a lot of things.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> It could be a prop pipe.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> In any case, I'm not- in any, in any case I've never done it and I never will.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, but eating too much fast food can give you a heart attack. I mean... so many things are deadly for you.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What about fast food, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> My father used to smoke and he went through a whole bunch of heart attacks. He suffered three- <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Well, I think that might have to do more with his weight.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He suffered through three or four triple bypasses.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I think that's... that's more like a weight issue.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He has a pacemaker!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, eh...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey ya guys, leave him alone. Ya know, my granddad, he smoked most of his life. He quit for 25 years and still died of lung cancer. I mean that's just the way it is. And your body never gets rid of it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, what about ''[pause]'' Chris, what about fast food? That's- that's bad for you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey Chris. Chris, could you do me a favor and send an email to Cassie? She's very worried about you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Yeah sure, I'll send her an email later.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, thanks.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, I've got uh, a certain someone you know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No no.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -she has to, uh, she wants to ask you w- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Also, she said something about some hair.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh yeah. Yeah, that's uh... that's another issue right there. Um, hmmm. I'll talk to her about that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, does, uh, drinking cause cancer?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, but it causes liver dysfunction and likely bar fights and automobile accidents.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, bar fights, but— <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Bar fights!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> -but I don't think that bar fights are that big of a problem.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I think bar fights are awesome.<br />
<br>''[People agree bar fights are awesome]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> But bar fights are bad. I got into a bar fight once and one of my hands got cut and two fingers from my left hand. Bar fights suck.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well, I think that might be more because you're Mexican. Are you sure you didn't lose them picking bo- picking grapes and- or something?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> No, Mexican people are more more- more much macho man; we get into bigger fights. We're more awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No- I think it might be because you got your hands stuck in some machinery when you were out picking in the vineyards.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't know about you guys, but I like- I like having bar fights.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Crashes Due To Math===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't have to be drunk to be in a bar fight or in an automobile accident, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but they increase the likeliness of it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You've been in an autobile— automobile accident, I mean, were you drunk?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I was distracted.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Uh, by what? I mean, it's kinda hard to be dist— you gotta be focused on driving man-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I was doing math in my head.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, math in your— <br />
<br>[Trolls talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> My mind got distracted by being its own calculator.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Are you good at math?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, is that for school?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Are you some kind of savant?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's impossible.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Guys, you're getting ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you like a mathematic genius or something?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> You know some artist people have like superpowers in their head. They can do like geniuses and add really well. ''[interrupted briefly by Jack saying something else about savant]'' Chris you are already an artist. Do you have any like, magical powers?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, I heard autistic people are really good at math. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Well not all the stereo- some of that sounds like stereotypes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[talking over Chris]'' ...it has to do with mental ability; I mean, what's the...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean I don't know- I mean I'm not saying that I'm a total genius. I mean I know- I know enough to get by.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What's the highest level of math you've taken Chris?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> College level.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I mean like algebra, or calculus or...?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. I believe I just did trigonometry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Very impressive.<br />
<br>[long pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So I was wondering. When did you get the CAD degree? I figured it's like a fine arts degree or something? I mean wha-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I designed a whole- I designed buildings and machinery and such along there. I designed the whole CWCVille shopping center.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don't you have a job then?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Your fans would love to see that Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' -I mean use that to design like, actual buildings? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I think I just told you I designed the CWCVille sho-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I don't mean in your comic. I'm just saying-<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde Isn't Popular And Chris Should Program===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well it's a good st-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So I heard you got some nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'll be putting an update on da YouTube soon, but not right now. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking maybe you could like, you know, get a degree in game design and make the Sonichu game? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah man, it's not that hard to learn programming. C++ man.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">''Falsion:'''</font> Clyde, he hates you, why are you talking?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm just giving him some advice, I mean C++ is-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you here? We don't like you. You totally ruined Chris's life.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't ruin his life. He ruined his own life.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yes you did. You've ruined his life. You raped his girlfriend. <br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks at once over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If he was the man he said he was, he'd have gone to Nintendo, made all that money. How- how are you going to make money now Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Time will tell.<br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks again]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, time will tell Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font>''[unclear]'' -need a plan, you know? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking uh, if- uh- would you be interested in getting a degree in game design. Making the game or something? Like if you had to? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Maybe but uh- I still have things to sort out in my real life.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah it's kinda unfortunate what happened with the Nintendo thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah- hang on a second, I'll be right back. Mm- ''[clattering]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So be honest guys am I really that much of a bother. I mean...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah you kind of are.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like a total dickfart.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You realize weed causes cancer? <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I didn't know that. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> And it causes the munchies. You're gonna get fat, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's okay, man, because I work out.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Do you play Guitar Hero standing up?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I play Guitar Hero while on the treadmill. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Will the Sonichu game be a- ''[muffled]'' -or a Wii one?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> It be a Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Wii would like to play. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh. I only got a DS. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I heard you are very good at HTML. Why don't you make a HTML Sonichu game? That would be awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't think you can make a game in HTML.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A- anyway I came back...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris? How many courses did you have to take to get that degree in CAD? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -pretty sure you can make a game in HTML-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[speaking over]'' I'm took abo- took about two- took about two years to four years. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, if you can write HTML you can write C++, make your own games. Pretty simple man. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well it's something I'll consider. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde why are you talking to him? He hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm trying to give him some suggestions. I'm not insulting him, OK? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> HTML seems kinda outdated, so to speak. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font>I learn- I took two HTML classes so at least I know how to do- at least I know the ins and outs when it comes to like, workin' on it in the raw data- in the notepad.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> So you don't use Dreamweaver?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I also use Net- also use Netscape composer. <br />
<br>''[Someone starts singing 'Dreamweaver']''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I heard they went bankrupt or something.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't- I don- I don't listen to news because I don't care about bad news. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But that's not bad news that's just safety...<br />
<br>''[Talking over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why you gotta bring this bad vibe in here? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> OK OK I'll chill, I'm sorry it's just my wife- ''[can't hear over Chris typing extremely loud]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris you don't hear about these ones in a while. Like yesterday some guy in my town got run over by a train and he- he died. And that's a really bad thing, you know but you have to hear about it. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yeah but that's because you're Mexican. You Mexicans always play around the train tracks, what's with you? <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No come on, don't be racist.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> It's because Mexicans are stupid. I'm surprised I can use a computer. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' CrassCrab why do you have to be so mean?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> 'Cause my mother was raped by a Mexican. And I'm part Me- ''[muffled]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry man.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> That isn't fair to take it out on every other Mexican out there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His rule applied to millions. Just ignore him.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No I'm not my mother was raped by Mexicans.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> CrassCrab I'm tired of listening to you, get out of here. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Not all Mexicans are like that we- we- I am as Mexican guy. Not all Mexican guys are- ''[drowned out by typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't get me started on them. But that will be another day. Cause I'm sick of hearing bad news.<br />
<br />
===Chris Types Fast (And Hates Hex-Box)===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris what are you uh- typing there?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm typing a email. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> How many words can you type? How fast can you type? Sounding fast there. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhh say about uh- sorta between thirty and a hundred. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's quite a good range man. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like "The Flash", minus the red jump-suit.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh Chris um- I was wondering- ''[unclear]'' -would it be uh a Wii game or a DS game or both. I only own DS and I don't have any money for a Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[overlapping]'' Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wii, DS and Pla- hopefully uh- possibly uh, PlayStation 2 or 3. Never on [[Hex_Box|Hex-Box]]. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> When you gonna do this shit?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Why don't you like the Hex-Box? I mean I have an Xbox, I would love to play online with you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'd like to say this. Before Chris says anything about that I just wanna say that today my wife came home from the mall shopping for her usual clothes, that Gucci purse I had to buy for her. You know what she came home with? I wanted a PS3 but you know what she gave me was a frickin' Xbox 360. The Elite one? ''[someone speaks over]'' I know, I kept telling her like "Honey this isn't what I wanted. I wanted the PlayStation 3 so I can play LittleBigPlanet, Metal Gear Solid and Sonic Unleashed" <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You can put Sonic Unleashed on the Hex Box as well as Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Too whiny to make out]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Nintendo just- rejected your offer? Cause I- I heard a rumor that there was going to be a Sonichu game or something. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris uh. Cassie wants you to send her your Wii number so she can talk to you on the Wii. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright uhhhhh. I'll get- have to get my Wii number now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Send it to her in an email please.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they completely hate Sony. And they hate Microsoft as well. I mean this guy, Reggie? He always talks about kicking their ass and stuff. He's kinda crazy. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I know. Reggie's very mean he never brought out ''[unclear]'' to America. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah I wanted to play that game.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talked over]'' -I'm tellin' you guys. Reggie's just a great ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Like what?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can- I can't say anything OK but... you'll see. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah so I don't think like if you got the deal with Nintendo I don't think they'd put it on like mu- like anything else but the Wii or DS. Yeah, cause that Reggie guy he frickin' hates Sony. And Microsoft. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font>Wasn't he also the head of VH1?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or Pizza Hut.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. What are your favorite places to eat at? <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember um he ''[unclear]'' -but before that he was with Sega when Dreamcast was out. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yup. Let me type this email please. I mean y'all keep talking I'll just listen. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's no reason to hate the Xbox. Let's be honest.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or um- Chris um- do you wanna release your game on Nintendo and on Sony. If you do talk to somebody like EA or something, you can like do um- multi-console thing like a (?) party thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[busy typing]'' Hmm. Well it's all to think about. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I mean Sega does third party now so um- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah well I'm gonna keep typing this email here. Y'all keep talking. <br />
<br>''[Sound of Chris typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's true, it's true. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Chris I wanted to tell you that Cassie's going to be here any- any second so you can talk to her. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Hm. ''[continues typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Don't you care about her? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[annoyed]'' I'm typin' da email to her right now! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah um 360 is pretty bad um- it red-rings all the time. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> I've had mine over two years. The same one. And it has not red-ringed yet. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Dude you have to pay $50 just so you can play online. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[echoing]'' Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah it's bullshit.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah it's totally free on PlayStation. And Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris. Chris. No, no, no, no, I gotta talk about this. [long pause] Chris...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupting]'' I get less connection problems myself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can't let you get away with this Chris. You spent over $1000 on the PlayStation Network. OK? And you say you can't afford $50 for the Xbox? Terrible reason. That's a terrible reason. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, um, Cogs I had a friend of mine whose red-ringed a lot of times. She did not like it at all. She got herself a PS3 instead. <br />
<br>''[Chris is STILL typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I heard that like- the PS triple eats up a lot of energy and like- has like- burned houses down. Cause it messes up the- no but the PS3 really- <br />
<br>''[More of Chris typing then audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So when's the next comic coming out Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I can't say. I don't have a date for it right now. I've been busy with the- with real life and such. You know getting the s- getting the website back up and all that. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh but I've been waiting so long. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I gotta tell you something Chris. ''[unclear]'' -to the trolls but I haven't done anythin' myself. It's run off into splinter groups doin' stuff to you. Ever since the Panda thing, I haven't done anything to you man. Everybody's been running round doing things. I have no control anymore. So I'm back here. This is why I'm back here. Do you understand? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. I hear you.<br />
<br />
===Nudes On YouTube===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I hear you got some uh- nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> What? <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hear you got some nudes on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> NUDES!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> That's what I thought- I have nothing na- I have nothing like that on the nu- on the YouTube. I've nothing like that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh someone posted the pics form the ED page. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> They're just tryin' ta get on- they're just tryin' ta get on my nerves again. But I'm not gonna let 'em.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Did you take those pictures or what? Where'd they come from?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Uh, are they Photoshopped?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah most of- Yes. Most of them are Photoshopped.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I can help you with ED. Chris I can help you with ED.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You can see the neck and the body doesn't quite match up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, Chris. Cassie's just arrived. She's a little nervous about talking to you, but she's gonna talk to you soon. Is that OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I just got one quick comment. The ED people were in contact with me, but I've lost contact with them. But I know you can delete that page permanently. I'm tryin' to help you man. You can get that page down forever. Even the entire site. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What, after you raped uhm- Sarah? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I'm trying to make amends. So let me do my business. All right?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's too late to make amends. Look what you did. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um. Cogsdev said she had a look at the data, they have it up in Image editing software.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah. Well...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I don't know what to tell you there. <br />
<br>''[Several trolls speak at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Doesn't that mean they're real? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I don't think so. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You don't think so?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Well, did you take them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Then where did those pictures come from? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who took those?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I don't know. And I'd rather not talk about that anymore. It's making me feel uncomfortable.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Are you lying to your fans Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> We don't feel confort- we don't feel comfortable. We're big fans of your work and we don't like being lied to. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I'd like to make a point. It might just be a doppelganger [sic].<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, you know the thing I hate most is lies. I like to spread the truth about you Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You say you're honest, but you're lying to us.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[clearly annoyed]'' Fine, fine. Some those pictures are real. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Some of them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Some of them but not all of them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Like, which ones aren't real?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'd rather not go into detail because I'd rather not look at 'em. Cause uh- ''[interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' -are you ashamed of it?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Do you not like to look in the mirror?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You owe it- you owe it to your fans.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, but- yeah, but- yeah, but upon looking at those it's like ref- it's like reflecting a pe- uh p- a past moment in my life where I- I was played for the fool. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah, by the man in the pickle suit?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh that guy- I hate that guy.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah I saw- he was trolling some other people you know? So you're not alone, Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he took pictures of me like that too...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That guy's an asshole, I hate him.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhhh yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He took pictures of my wife too. Sick bastard. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[I think she says he is a peanut]''<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br>[another pause]<br />
<br />
===Chris Hates Harry===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I just uh- never was fond of it. Ever since it came out, I was never fond of it. ''[unclear as troll speaks over]'' -just like I hate Harry Potter because he's s- he's goin- he's uh- in compe- was in competition against the world of Pokemon. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Well that- that doesn't make sense. But they're two different medias. Pokemon-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah but- yeah but still he-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> -Harry Potter is a book.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah but he poses as competition against them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> That's not really competition. I mean- <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talks over Jack]'' Oh that reminds me about books- Vivi- Vivian wrote a book and sent it to you. You never read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes. I am afraid I- yeah, yeah- I'm uh- I've been uh- so I've been under uh- too much stress between internet and all that. I'll ge- I'll read it, I'll read it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's been waiting for your response for quite a long time.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I like the cover. (pause) Nice cover.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he is right about that. That is a nice cover. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah the book is pretty good- I read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Well I- I will definitely make it a point to uh- read it. Very soon. <br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Audible over the others]'' Did you ever read Twilight?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I've heard th- I've heard Twilight and I've seen the trailer but I haven't seen the movie, I'll wait for it to come out DVD or Blu-ray.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br />
===Random Access Humor Python Style===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh OK, I heard a lot of girls like Twilight. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I see. Hey Polly does your voice sound like that, 'cause it sounds like [[BlueSpike|a guy talking falsetto]]. I mean no personal offense. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> That's not very nice...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm sorry. Believe me I didn't mean any pe- anything personal it's just like, you know- hm- kind- just kinda takes me by surprise a bit, that's all.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I knew a girl like that in high school.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Sounding upset]'' I can't help it if I'm born like this.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I'm- I'm- I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah she's a girl. I saw her pics. She's a girl.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I'll s- I'll take his word for it. I'm sorry I cu- I accused you there.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um. OK. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You know, aut- I mean- let's- it's just uh- you know it's uh- you know it's uh a bit- just a spot of fun. [[Random-access_humor|Stupid humor]]. Monty Python's Flying Circus. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> We know you love that. There's just so many references to it in the comic. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah I d- after they put all of the entire series on PlayStation Network I downloaded the Hamlet episode- that was the one that had uh- Jimmy Hill parodying himself. It also had this funny bit where it was like, you know- ''[in a stupid voice]'' "...and now it's time for The Robinsons, an everyday story about blah-de-blah-de-blah-de-blah. Dum-de-dum-de-dum-de-duhhh-dum-de-dum"- and so on...<br />
<br>''[A troll begins to speak but is interrupted by a very high-pitched Chris]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> "Morning Mrs. Robinson- Morning Mrs. Robinson. Comin' out shoppin'? Oh- you've been shoppin', what did you buy? What's this?-" 'What did you buy this for?'[Trolls laugh over him]'' -It was a bargain!"<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I've heard you do that before. I don't know where. Anyway uh- uhm- Whatever happened to Jimmy Hill? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I haven't heard from him in a long time so just assuming uh- he gave up or uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I think he got a- I think he got a, uh- children's TV program in England.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well he ain't botherin' me, so I'm not worried about him anymore.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Ye- but he's stealing Sonichu. Bastardizing it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah he did but uh- he s- but haven't seen any updates on his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' -profile, he's still doing it.<br />
<br>''[Several trolls talk over each other about him having a TV show]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Fails At Spanish Pt. 2===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' <br />
<br>''[Troll says something more about the TV show, but it's muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wants to say hi. Just forgive her English because she can't speak very well, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> All right. Just sent her the email by the way, just now. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Hey, Chris. It's me, Cassie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi, Cassie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Fine, and you?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm feelin' OK. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Why haven't you emailed me? I was really about-was really worried about you. What's happened? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry. I be- I've bee- I've been busy with the Internet and the stress and all that. I sent ya an email just now go- it's got my Wii number in it so you can add me to your contacts. I've been talking to uh- I've been talking to Sarah lot- quite a bit lately. She's been helping me with uh- updating the Sonichu site, since I've uh- since I'm working on uh- it's re-uploading and such. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Kay, I believe you. I going to check ''[pronounced like 'sheg']'' it, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You're going to where?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[very quietly]'' Check it.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> To check it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> To "shag-it"? Is that the-<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Check the email. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[still doesn't understand]'' Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> I going to check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, check email. ''[Laughs]'' Yeah I'm sorry I tr- I tried to uh- understand but it just kind of messed up a little bit. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don- why don't you two speak in Spanish?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhh. I'm not exactly fluent. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ¿Sabes hablar español, Chris? (Do you know how to speak Spanish?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí, hablo español. (Yes, I speak Spanish)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Oh. ''[pause, one of the trolls says something to her]'' Oh, eso es muy sexy. (That is very sexy.)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Ohhhh. Te gusta. Te gusta muchísimo, (You like it. You like it a lot)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> La verdad, si. (To tell you the truth, yes)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Me amos mis amigas muchísimas. Sons muy bueñas! (I love my friends (feminine) a lot. They are very good.) [Correction: Amo a mis amigas muchísimo. Son muy buenas.] <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Oh, eso es tan cool en español! Muy bueno! (That's so cool in Spanish! Very good)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Muy bueño (very good)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Aha, exacto. (it is!)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]'' Okay, that's good. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Well, I going down, okay?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Okay, you're going down- by the way, let me ask ya Cassie, do you ever- you've uh- you've actually met uh Sarah May in person, haven't you? <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Not. She's on Internet.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Okay. That's cool- but anyway uh- you got- you d- you have my Wii number, uh- you can reply the email with your Wii number and it'll be registered on the Wii network. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[very haltingly]'' Yes. So. Cool. Talk with you Chris. You are so cool. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Heh. Uhhhh. You flatter me. Tú me flatteray. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[Weak laugh]'' Well, see you. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[In his 'baby voice']'' Adiós. ''[sigh]'' <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós, bebé.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós, chiquita bonita. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>[Pause as audio cuts out]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -it again. <br />
<br>[Another pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So anyway, Chris. I've been working on Rabbichoso for a day and uh- I was just wonderin' like, it's- it's supposed to compete with the Sonichu, you know? If you weren't aware of that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhhh. I grabbed onto d- grabbed onto g I- grabbed onto the... that gist. I'm aware- I'm aware of the gist of the theory. Uh. I'm aw- I'm aware that you're- that you're tryin' to compete. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know what competition does. It's drives uh- it drives consumer interest- Well that's why you know- It's great. You have to compete with high quality things. ''[muffled]''- that's why I'm trying to help. You know, compete. Just so you're aware of this, OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I see. -see. <br />
<br>[Pause]<br />
<br />
===Rabbichoso And Animu===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris we've been ge- been getting uh threatening images from the Pickle Man. Did you s- did you see the left? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I've not heard from the Pickle Man in lo- in a long time. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Apparently there are multiple ones because this one is, uh, not a darkie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh-huh. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> It's good that they're leaving you alone now. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Seems like they found more easier targets. Seeing as how you became [[Navy|saltier]].<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh. You know I originally got that line- quote from an e- ep- episode of ExCel Saga. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> From what?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> ExCel Saga.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Oh, ExCel Saga. Oh, yeah, that's a good anime.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> AIII I-Falazzo! (''He means [[ScotPalazzo|Il-Palazzo]]'')<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, have you ever seen two animes, ''[muffled]'' and Schooldays?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I have not seen either of those. I like Steel Angel Kurumi as well.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, how much Japanese do you know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only a little bit. I'm not totally fluent. I can say that with all honesty. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something unintelligible, not quite Japanese]''<!-- It sounds like he's saying "You say you can't- can you speak with me?" in CHINESE. --><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Huh?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Never mind, you won't understand it.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[unclear] Chris-Chan. Genki desu-ka?''<br />
<br />
===Chris Could Kill Clyde===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, I just wanted to say, uh, you're doing a good job, like, keeping calm even though Clyde is here. I mean u- I thought you'd be, like, more angry at him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm being calm with you guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> -I would have been choking him by now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I'd have kicked his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Preach to the choir. Pr- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I'd make him choke on a pickle if it were up to me.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You guys can't touch me otherwise I'd kick all your asses. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, bring it.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris could kick Clyde's ass anytime.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Let's see Chris do it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Bring it to me any day of the week and I'll definitely show him a hard- day's night. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah I think you could kick his ass.<br />
<br>[Trolls and Clyde talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Sings]'' -been a hard day's night...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -never mind, just...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean that as a- meant that as in I would beat... him up. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Kick his ass?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm very strong. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. I'm gonna see you later, OK?<br />
<br>''[Unison of goodbyes]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> OK see ya. Thank you so much Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[ignoring his fans]'' Yeah I can- I can lift about my weight. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Like um- if Clyde were right in front of you, what would you do to him?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Like, what kind of style of fighting do you have?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, shut up.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I gotta know my competition. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Personal- in the physical offense. ''[sigh]'' I would definitely be giving you so much physical pain. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's not a s- that's not a style. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I would beat you up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He deserves it man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, that's still not a style...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He uses fisticuffs. He's a gentleman. Gentleman fisticuffs. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Whatever, I'll just see-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Stop arguing and just-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ''[Over previous troll]'' I mean, if he did that to my sweetheart I'd fucking kill him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well. He's not- he's not going to come over and kill me, I know that. He doesn't have the money. [pause] You know I'm surprised that you're mad here. You're much kinder in person I thought you- Now I'm just expecting you at my door anytime, just waiting for you to stand here with an axe or something. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Knives are too messy. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Ah, now a sword- sword's are usually better.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What about poison?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Poison's good, poison's good.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde, what- do you want him to beat your ass?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I was just expecting it, you know.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, you know what's another thing? I would definitely not tell you how I would be hurting you, but I would definitely give you a who- big amount of pain. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, he's gonna keep you guessin'!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he deserves it. After everything he's done-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Muffled by troll]'' -going to kill me, I'd like to know. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I'm just going to let you cover in- worry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh so you're never going to show up, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Oh yes I will show up. But you just won't be expecting it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't even know where I live, do you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Find out!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Maybe I should give you my address. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, you should track him down and kick his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> But I'm going to leave you guessing too...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Defend Panda's h- Panda's honor.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, hi Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> 'sup Julie.<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br>''[Everyone talks over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde's A Dick===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I notice her mic doesn't work. But still I'm just letting her know that- acknowledge her presence. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're doing well staying calm even though Clyde's here.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, Clyde's a total dick.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Fucker.<br />
<br>''[Rustling]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I mean, he's taken over everything. The IRC. This. I can't- no one can stop him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' -over there, so...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll:'''</font> I- I like Rabbichoso.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Of course you do. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll''':</font> It's funny. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I will not offer any new comment on it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, OK. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, when can we expect the next Sonichu to be released.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, we've been eager.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It'll be soon. It will be soon.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah just ignore Clyde man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean if you're going to put a hard date on it, you'd better deliver your promise. If you don't, I'll strike harder. That's all I'm saying.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. You're saying if I don't set a date, you're gonna...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no. I'm saying don't make promises you can't keep. Don't make promises you can't keep.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He'll choke you with his medallion bitch!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who the hell do you think you are?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I agree with Cogs over there. Maybe you should do just a page a day, not release all at once. Keep his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you telling him this when he hates you?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm giving him suggestions man, OK? OK?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Only thing he's gonna suggest to you is 'shut the fuck up'!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, seriously man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It's alright. <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Penny Arcade's slow.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh you mean like Penny Arcade or ''[unclear]'' or MegaTokyo?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they're just like- boring. Then they because sellouts. <br />
<br />
===Chris's Country Cookin===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Chris, where's your favorite place to eat?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. Can't really say uh- but I like country cookin'. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> What's country cooking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh no G's in the sto- no G's in the name by the way, no G. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah what's country cooking? I'm not familiar with that.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's like uh- som- something like Golden Corral. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But Golden Corral is a national franchise.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh Chris, how are your parents?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> They're OK.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br>[Long pause]<br />
<br />
===Sex Is Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I've got a sug- another suggestion. Now be quiet all of you cause I know you hate me. Just- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, Chris hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well don't defend him. He can defend himself OK? He's a man. But whatever-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let him speak.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm suggesting that- you go on and on about this sex stuff but you've never gotten laid, have you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I like to put myself in the imaginative situation that I'd like to be in and the sexual stimulation. So I can be ready for [[ego|myself]] for when I do actually have my first time.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well my first time was- I'll just say that it's terrible, OK? I didn't know what I was doing, she didn't know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let me guess, you prematurely ejaculated?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no, it's not like that you don't know what to do. Every woman's told me OK? You can't prepare-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Clyde]'' First time's always awkward...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -I learnt that mistake a while back, OK whatever. OK, you just- you can't prepare for your first time. You might as well just have a really bad first time so you learn from your mistakes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm not trying to defend Clyde or anything, but yeah it's kinda true. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Hmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The girl I first fell in love with is the girl I'm married to right now. Samantha just changed my world. But marriage does get boring.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Tips To STAY STRAIGHT===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I know how you say how important it is to stay straight, um- I'm having trouble staying straight, do you have any suggestions?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Watch a bunch of pornography with uh- with naked women. OK, a lot of naked women.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That happened to me one time...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, I have this friend I play video games with, is that gay? He's male by the way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry could you- I'm sorry could you repeat that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I have this guy I'm friends with he always comes over to my house to play video games. Is that gay? I'm kinda scared. You know? I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Hmm. Is he making any advances towards you? Personally. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I dunno how to tell. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Like uh sit- does he always sit next to you when he's playing games. Playing video games.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Yeah he usually does. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I see. Hmm. My- well- my suggestion in that case, would be to keep a heavy distance between you and that guy. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he meant anything gay by it though. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he means anything like- gay about it. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well, still- it's always best to find out- you can ask him. Don't be afraid to ask him. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> What would you do in this situation?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well if he said yes then I would uh- basically- let me think about that a moment. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you have any friends who're are like, guys?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only acquaintances and only a few of them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you play video games with people or anything? Do they come over to your house?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. No.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I remember-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> ''[Cuts Polly off]'' I'm just worried I might be gay or something. I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You probably are Falsion, but that's OK. No, look dude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Leave him alone! Leave him alone! He's straight!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Why?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Hey, let's have a calm conversation here. Let's not have any fights.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br>''[Trolls speak over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I've been reading the Sonichu comics and man, they are page-turners! Seri- I was on- I was on the edge of my seat for a while. I ju- I couldn't- I couldn't- you know. Just had to read and read.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Thank you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, can I be your friend? I know I'm a guy. I don't mean anything gay by it. Can I be your friend? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. I dunno. <br />
<br />
===A Wild Snorlax Appears===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Do you want any hotdogs?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I'm OK. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> No?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I was talking with my mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I was wondering if I could be your friend.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I h- heard you only like, you only like to be acquaintances. With guys. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, ummm. Let's just pretty much leave it at acquaintance. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hello Mrs. Chandler. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> She can't hear you, I'm wearing my earphones.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Listen, I'm not gay. I don't- you know- yeah. Never mind.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I mean- I mea- I-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What do you have against gay people? I'm serious to hear this. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's just unnatural and it's against God's will. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, it's not like it's a choice. You can't change who you are like- you're a creative guy but I mean they're just gay. They can't change that. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm just answering a few questions mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You don't have to answer. Nobody's payin' you to do that.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yes they are.<br />
<br>''[shuffling sounds, clanging]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> It ain't none of their business no-way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I wouldn't be asked questions like that by employers or anybody. Don't tell people what you d- what you think. Keep that to yourself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris what's hap- what's happening?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, obviously, my mother is offering her input.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Tell her you're just talking to some friends. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' I don't need no back talk from somebody on the other end of the phone.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear you, Mom. Hmm. Hmm. <br />
<br>''[scraping sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> These- these idiots don't have any brains or- they don't have any idea this way or that.<br />
<br>''[more banging, clanging and tumbling sounds. Sounds like washing up]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Is right now a bad time right now? I mean-<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Pixelblocks, Pixelblocks!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Someone's saying "Pixelblocks." <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you saying [[Pixelblocks]]?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>''[Chris's mom has been singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful singing voice, Chris.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[Audio cuts back in]'' -all the anxiety, causing you stress.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, well sometimes they don't; they can be peaceful.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Well, your mom and dad get the crappy end of the stick.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm, a lot of us do.<br />
<br>''[more clattering sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Yeah, just like this nasty mess over here that you guys left that I got to clean up.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm. ''[Audio cuts]'' -Yeah, I took care of my bills. I mean, not completely, but I took care of them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> What about going to, uh, Redmond?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> We! (Wii?) <br />
<br>[unintelligible, windows beeps]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[laughing]'' Yeah, sweetheart pool.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Mmhmm. ''[laughing]'' Like the other side of the pillow.<br />
<br>''[someone sighing. Clanging noises return after short absence]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' ...is all, I mean, living with your parents is okay bad-in today's bad economy, but at 26, come on. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Shut up, you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I'm being nice.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde isn't so bad a guy. He does bad things, but he's pretty cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah he's reformed. He's seen the error- Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How- how could he do that to Sarah? I mean- That's not right.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah. Well, that's like Luke... That's like Luke and Laura from General Hospital. I know that's like, before y'all's time, but, um... Luke was a rapist and she-he raped Laura and then, like, a few months later they get married. So... ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, I believe Clyde was trying to make amends from his past actions.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, but Chris, can you uh- can you forgive him?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Random Troll:'''</font> ''[whispering]'' White whale, holy grail! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Can you forgive a small-dicked Asian? Just a thought.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He's not Asian! <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm half-Asian, okay? My parents ''[unclear]'' I don't really wanna go into it. It's too bo-boring for you people. But this is why I ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you there? Just makin' sure, buddy.<br />
<br>''[clattering]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Move out.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Another Troll''':</font> Well, how do I do that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi there, my kitty. ''[In baby voice]'' Yes, there's a pretty kitty.<br />
<br>''[Someone speaking with a voice-synth]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hang on a second. I've got, like, a thousand different... Oh, Crass, why'd you do that?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Because. You can unban him but, yeah. I'm not gonna friggin' stand for that. <br />
<br>''[Sound of a vacuum cleaner]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> I (m j d?) do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I heard the "g" word.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um, is that a vacuum cleaner?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Yeah, sounds like it is.<br />
<br>[Trolls speak but are drowned out by vacuum]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ...room or something.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I think the vacuum cleaner... <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If that's the government trying to do some kind of thing, then my name's Rusty Shackleford.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's a loud fan.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I have a fan above my stove, too.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Hey... I do, too.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Wait- wha- wait. You-you-you're in the kitchen? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Me too.<br />
<br>''[possibly Sonic game sound effects]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmhm? Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I'm pretty sure it's already asked, but I didn't catch the answer. When can we expect the next Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I-I-I told you my suggestion of releasing a page a day or something. I mean, it's a pretty good one. It-it-it allows for a good time. Finish a page a day. You upload it. You know? It's very good. Works very well.<br />
<br>''[Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh. I mean- you guys keep asking when he's going to finish it but I wonder how many pages are going to be in the new one? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> The last one was like, thirty. Just release it over the span of a month. Works fine. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...go up to ninety thousand...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[mutters something]''<br />
<br>''[Sound of Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Down by the river...side.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful voice, Chris.<br />
<br>''[clattering, typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[unclear, repeating the same two phrases]'' Gone down by the river, down by the water side, down by the riverside. Down by the waterside. Down by the riverside.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember ''[unclear]''<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -I'm hungry myself.<br />
<br>''[some kind of alarm sounding]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Then go eat.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I already ate.<br />
<br />
===Anime And Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I wonder what anime Chris watches nowadays. There's not many on television but do you still watch Japanese cartoons? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[In a bad accent]'' Kawaii desu ne. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I want to watch Shuffle. He said it was very good. He said it was sad. I don't know if I wanna watch- I don't like sad stuff. I like to be happy when I watch anime.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, and um, do you watch stuff like Bleach and um Code Geass or Naruto or something?<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I'm glad to hear that Shuffle isn't sad. I'm definitely going to watch it sometime.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um, yeah Chris that was a good call on Naruto. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah there's a lot of people who don't like it much either. Too popular.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But please. Please. Hope. ''[audio cuts out briefly]'' Uh, Chris, please consider When They Cry.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Ooh, I saw that one. It was a really good series.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, I know; that was good, like- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah. Both seasons of it. <br />
<br>''[Windows beeps, voices overlapping]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I could link you to Season One if you want. Yeah, Samantha got me into that. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...you'll give it a try, Chris. It's a very, very good series.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Hm. Hey, Julie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...lots of ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Watch Shuffle. You got the six episodes of Shuffle or... Which o- which anime? I'm sorry. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh and JoJo's Bizarre Adventure is also cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I really liked JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. Very ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Za warudo!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah, I think Shuffle is quite all right. I like Heidi. She's sweet and loyal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> That's a good one. One of my favorites is Black Lagoon.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris have you ever seen La Blue Girl?<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other about different anime]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, uh, Chris can I, my, uh, I don't know if it's all right, but, like, could you like, give me an email sometime? I could, uh... recommend you to... this anime that... Polly and... Julie like to watch. They're quite- they... Oh, C-and Cogs has recommended such great anime. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[talking to his mother]'' Yeah? That's ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> As well as Julie-Julie's the person that got me into anime.<br />
<br />
===People Love Poketunes===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> -we can go into this later cause I got my headphones on. And, Mom, you know what something else? They liked your singing.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> What? I don't sing.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> That's my laugh; that's my laugh. They couldn't hear me. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They heard you. Singin'. Just now.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I can't sing!<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I'm tone deaf. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They just heard you singing, and liked your voice.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay. Did you write checks for all those bills and pack everything ''[unclear]''?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yes, Mother, I did.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You're not telling me no story?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm not telling you no story.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> OK. It's important [''inaudible''] did you pay them?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, I paid that one. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay, you have to be honest with me, 'cause, see, you're settin'...<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm being honest, I'm being honest.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> How you respond to what [we] talk about. You say you ought to something and you don't do it then that's gonna change my ideas ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay... I'll be sure to pay the remaining differences next month.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> No, this month.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I know but I couldn't pay them all with 90 dollars so there's still some left ''[sound cuts]'' ...oh, you're cooking them up here, okay, that's why you turned the fan on over the stove.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br>''[Trolls rejoice and mock Momma Chandler]''<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 1|Mumble Chat 1]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 3|Mumble Chat 3]]|}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Spanish]]<br />
==Links==<br />
*[https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBOVVDS0JtSDNvMWs Download]<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_2&diff=162995Mumble 22012-09-26T20:36:58Z<p>Irisviel: </p>
<hr />
<div>{{Articleofthenow}}<br />
[[Image:0839-MomDesi.JPG|thumb|right|180px|In Mumble 2, a Wild [[Barbara Chandler|Snorlax]] appeared.]]<br />
<br />
'''Mumble 2''' is the second [[Mumble]] chat that took place on 4 [[February 2009]]. More than an hour long.<br />
<br />
This is a more organized Q&A type chat than [[Mumble 1]]. Questions from [[Clyde]] about [[sex]] in the [[comic]] and interesting tidbits about how Chris believes sex is the same as romance. This is pretty hard hitting, with stuff like how Chris is into [[McDonald's|fast food]] yet he's against tobacco. A lot of drama involving Clyde.<br />
<br />
Length: '''1:49:17'''<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
<br />
===Notes===<br />
* Chris doesn't like Clyde because he stole his sweetheart.<br />
* Audio cuts out for a minute before Chris says: "...HYMEN!" (You broke her hymen)<br />
* Trolls claim [[Panda]] is with Clyde, Chris wants to hear her voice, they say she's busy<br />
* 'She and I WERE very close'<br />
* Chris didn't have $400-$800 to go and see Panda; claims he got this number from an airport website recommended by [[Miyamoto]]<br />
* Insists on [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] being in ''[[Animal Crossing]]''<br />
* Doesn't want to talk about his deal with them<br />
* Insists that he doesn't have to turn down his radio since his voice is louder (''it is horribly loud in the mic'')<br />
* Panda gave Clyde all of the sites, etc.<br />
* [[Sarah]] is going to be with Clyde, which Chris wants to deny<br />
* These motherfuckers keep talking over each other<br />
* Calls a troll's critique crap<br />
* [[Bubbles]] must be aroused, she isn't wet all the time<br />
* Bubbles is 90% water so does sperm just swim around forever? NO<br />
* Clyde: This is a children's comic, why so much sex?<br />
: '''Chris:''' It is romance. My best artwork is when they're making out 'romantic moments', drawn in protest to trolls. Shows that [[Rosechu]]s have vaginas, not [[duck]]s.<br />
* Admits to maybe going overboard<br />
* Trolls try to reason with him about the [[ED]] article: There wouldn't be an article if he didn't react like he does.<br />
* Trolls say that TV-Y7 means NO SEX but Chris points to romantic anime that have making out (cartoons are for kids, whatever the content).<br />
* Trolls talk about Japan being less strict about those things<br />
* Everyone gets to vote in [[CWCville]], even if they're [[Niggos|black]].<br />
* Got his idea from [[Mary Poppins]].<br />
* Troll tries to give historical background about cough medicine putting kids to sleep. Chris insists it was the lullaby that put them to sleep.<br />
* Discussion about Chris, 'gay message' sent by a troll<br />
* He calls Clyde a scoundrel<br />
* BELIEVE HIM HE IS STRAIGHT<br />
* Chris tries to speak Mexican at 20:50<br />
* Mexican speaks Mexican to him... he replies in Menglish<br />
* [[4-cent_garbage]] is located in Mexico<br />
* Someone says that he needs to improve his Mexican<br />
* Chris is against smoking, CWCville is smoke and alcohol free<br />
* Rehash of why [[tobacky]] is bad, his position on it, alcohol=bar fights<br />
* Chris's dad smoked and had several bypasses, has a pacemaker and has had heart attacks<br />
* Mention of his hair cuttings for his fans<br />
* Chris was doing math in his head, got in car crash.<br />
* Chris has taken college level math. Took trigonometry.<br />
* Trolls gang up on Clyde for stealing Panda<br />
* Time will tell when Chris will make the money he would have in the Nintendo deal<br />
* Trolls bash Clyde for his pot smoking <br />
* Chris doesn't watch news because it's bad news =(<br />
* Bashing of the Mexican<br />
* Chris can type 30 to 100 WPM, but can't type and talk at the same time<br />
* Chris says [[PSN]] is free though Clyde(?) points to the $1,000 Chris spent on PSN<br />
* Chris has been typing for 15 minutes now and it is VERY loud<br />
* Chris has been busy IRL therefore the comic release doesn't have a date<br />
* Someone points to nudes on [[YouTube]].<br />
* He does not have it on the YouTube, but he isn't going to take it anymore.<br />
* Claims some of the photos are photoshopped.<br />
* Clyde offers help to take ED page down.<br />
* Chris denies taking those pictures, doesn't want to talk about it, making him uncomfortable.<br />
* Some of the pictures are real. When questioned which ones are fake, Chris can't answer.<br />
* Chris hates Harry Potter because it was in competition with [[Pokémon]]!<br />
* Chris is too stressed to read Vivian's [[A Girl Who Brought Down the World|book]], but he likes the cover!<br />
* Polly, who has been talking the whole time is confronted by Chris who thinks she is a guy. Polly is upset. Chris apologizes.<br />
* [[Jimmy Hill]] has launched his Sonichu show<br />
* More Mexican talk at 55:10<br />
* Chris giggles and sighs happily when Cassie, another Mexican, compliments him and when she leaves he says 'Chiquita Bonita'<br />
* Rabbichoso talk (Sonichu.info)<br />
* Classic trolls are leaving Chris alone.<br />
* Chris likes Steel Angel Kurumi (''quote from [[Wikipedia:Steel Angel Kurumi|Wikipedia]]: often classified as ecchi due to the focus on fanservice and panty shots'')<br />
* Chris claims to be very strong, could beat Clyde up. Says he would show Clyde a [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force|Hard Day's Night]], and would give Clyde pain.<br />
* ShinyMarshtomp makes an appearance? Likes Rabbichoso<br />
* Chris likes to eat at [[Country Cookin]] (''like Golden Corral'')<br />
* Chris likes to imagine his first time. <br />
* Clyde says the first time is awful, Chris said it was because Clyde prematurely ejaculated<br />
* Watch porn with naked women to cure your gay<br />
* Guys sitting next to you = gay coming on to you<br />
* Falsion has been in the chat room and is afraid he is gay<br />
* A wild Snorlax appears<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
<br />
===Waiting for Chris===<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I can't wait to hear Chris! I'm a huge fan!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, goddamn these noodles are fantastic. Man, I wish I could eat like this everyday.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Have you eaten the rice balls?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no. These are noodles. These are-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Fan-fucking-tastic.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now they're all gone, it's fantastic, you know?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Sweetangie is Chris. Or, we think so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's definitely not the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm disappointed there's so many impostors out there. Kinda my fault, but, you know, if it weren't- ''[unintelligible]'' -hard to come by.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His mic was working last time he was here, just fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He usually capitalizes his words, like in every sentence.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is- I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Is it set to push to talk or something?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You better get us your email address Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah its push to talk. It's called push to talk. It's fantastic ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, just have him set it to voice activity. It works so much better that way.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Aww, he left.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> You guys are fucking idiots.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other again]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You guys scared him off by being guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, you fucking jackasses. Nice going.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Was that even the real...?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yes, that was the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He's too much of a pussy to talk.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, cause you scared him, or some- No, or he's too stupid to be.<br />
<br>''[Trolls Laugh]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Arrives===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Chris arrives, with radio playing loudly]'' Hello.<br />
<br>''[Trolls all greet him]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, now-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Why haven't you got your microphone working?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't know why my microphone [is] messed up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry, but we had an impostor here before.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm registered. I've got myself registered now. So, uh, hopefully-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> That's probably why. It had to like, uh- calibrate.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Well, I'm calibrated now.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So, Chris, have you seen Rabbichoso, it's fantastic.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't give a crap about your stupid pencil sketch.<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am not listening. I do not have to listen to ''you''.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Why, I'm not understanding [inaudible]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well for one thing,and I'll say it on here, you stole my sweetheart!<br />
<br>''[Cutout continues]''<br />
<br />
===PandaHalo, Trip to Redmond and Animal Crossing===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You broke her hymen!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I know it's a terrible mistake, but I plan to make it up to her. I'm getting married and uh- I'm doing the things I should do.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh and another thing, if she is really over there with you now, then put her on the mic. Please.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> She's not- He never said-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, Chris, she's very busy, OK. She's very busy.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's not over here right now. Okay? So lets drop it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, fine. Well could you tell her to please send me a message lettin' me know, for sure, so I can know- so I can know to-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' I'll let her know whatever you want, but it's her life. She doesn't have to send you a message. You failed her. You failed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' She and I were very close.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If you we're so close, then why didn't you go?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' Because I had- Aw, hang on a second. How do I- oh, that's right. This thing. Right. Mmm. Hold on a sec. Oh yeah, because I did not have four to eight hundred dollars!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It doesn't cost that much to go cross-country man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes it does. I know, I saw it on an airport website. Where I was be- Where I was- recommended to me by Mr. Miyamoto.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, you can drive there. It's not that hard.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened with that? I thought, um, didn't you have a deal with them or something? I heard a rumor that your characters were going to be in Animal Crossing.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, they are in Animal Crossing. And I did- and I do- I did have a deal with them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened though?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' I'd rather not say.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Radio, Clyde and Criticism===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, why don't you turn down the TV? It's hard to hear you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Annoyed sigh]'' I do not have a TV turned on in here.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I can hear it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have a radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I hear something in the background.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Burping throughout sentence]'' Well that's the- that would b- the radio. And it is not that loud.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But it shows up pretty well on your microphone mic. With due respect.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But still, my voice is louder than the radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Ah goo- ahh given.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh, Chris? Uh, when are you going to do the new Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something over Polly]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' Uh, I'll answer Polly's question. I'm not sure. It's, uh, it's in progress right now, I'm drawing it up.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I can't wait to read it!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Well, we'll see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Listen, Clyde kind of has admin on here, so we can't really do anything about him. So, yeah. I don't know.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Hard to hear over Chris's radio]'' ...with you guys. I love you guys. Just as much as Chris loves you guys. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I was angry. I was angry. But I'm calm now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't try to hurt any other person from now on.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm doing the best I can. I'm doing the best I can.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have much- I do not have much to say in response to that right now. Because I'm ticked off.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't let him get to you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're no better than he is, if you give in.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris, I just wanted to let you know I'm a huge fan of the comics, and I'm glad you keep doing what you're doing. You're doing a great job, and just keep it up, alright man?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, yeah, I appreciate the, uh, what's the word I'm looking for? The, the, uh- well, the encouraging words. Encouragement. I appreciate the encouragement. Well, there are things, uh- I- er- current events I do not appreciate. I appreciate the positive encouragement.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I can't really do anything. He took over the IRC channel. I used to be the owner. I mean Clyde. He's like taking over everything.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, it was because Panda gave it to me, you know. But anyway, I mean, you can't just listen to encouragement, you've got to listen to criticism, man. Criticisms are what make you better, you learn from your mistakes. You learn from mistakes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Be right back guys, my wife is calling.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I don't- I don't- Tons of people don't like the Rabbichoso art style, but you know, I gotta improve on that. That's something I plan to improve on. There's a lot of criticism in the death of Sonichu, right? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What? What did you just say?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a lot of criticism of Sonichu. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. For a moment there I thought you said something different.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What, what did you think I said? I'm just saying, there are people who like it and people who don't like it. You gotta start taking in those suggestions. You know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. So many things that will be improved upon. But, I just have to hear from Sarah herself that she really is going to be with you, Clyde. I have to hear it from herself. It's one thing to hear it from you and then it's- then on that note, it's just I find it very hard to believe. So I have to hear it from her.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I kinda think that Rabbichoso sucks. I mean, I think it could be funny, but it honestly looks like it's drawn by a kindergartner.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, Sonichu has evolved over the years. You can see that the art's getting better. Rabbichoso doesn't even look like something a beginner would do, honestly. I mean, ''[Interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A whole bunch of crap!<br />
<br>''[Everyone starts talking at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, Sonichu is in color.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I know, I accept his criticism. But you just called it crap! Now that's just rude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have emotions going behind me- uh, behind that opinion.<br />
<br />
===Cassie===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, did you get my message.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Aren't you going to be the gentleman, then? Aren't you gonna be the gentleman?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I just want to ask you, Chris. I'm Cassie's friend. She- she's worried sick about you. Why haven't you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did email her! As a- I- I haven't gotten any re-plies from her. I have emailed her and I have instant messaged her on A.I.M. and Skype. I haven't heard back from her. I don't know what's going on there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> ...you emailed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> When was the last time you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, hang on, I'll check.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris? I have a question. My fa- One of my favorite new characters is, um, Simonla, and like, I also like Zapina as well. Um, are they gonna have bigger parts in the series later on?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, could you repeat that question?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I was wondering if Simonla and Zapina will either have bigger parts in the series later on. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [[Sonichu_10#The_Final_Countdown|Possibly]]. Possibly, but, uh, I can't say for sure. Oh, and, uh, to answer your question, uh- in answer to, uh, I believe, uh, Screwhead, who asked? It was about four days ago. About four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Yeah. Four days ago? Okay, I'll tell her to check it out.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> The last email I sent was about four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> She'll contact you in a while, though.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I'll tell her to check it out and- and thanks Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright. Mm.<br />
<br />
===Bubbles's Pussy and Sex in the Comics===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris? I have a question.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, my favorite character is Bubbles, I kinda liked the, uh, the thing she had going with Blake, where she was kind of keeping the relationship secret. I thought that was kinda clever. I was wondering, uh, she's a water-type, so does that mean that her vagina is always wet, or does she have to be aroused like a normal woman?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, aroused. That's applied for all the, uh, Rosechus there. And also, like, you know, she's not just a water-type, she's also- she's a water- and electric-type, like uh- oh, shoot- What's the name of that one? Originated from Gold-Silver-Crystal series, uh, evolves from Chinchou? Lanturn. And she has, uh, she has Volt Absorb ability.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, Chris, another question following Bubbles. Uh, her body is 90% water, and now this thing about the whole sexual intercourse- about it. Now, don't take this rude, and you don't need to answer me... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...I totally respect your creative work. My wife actually got me into this, uh, show actually. So, what happens is- like, as you know, like, semens are like little fishes in themselves. Would that mean, I mean, would they actually have a route to fly into the egg, in theory, or do they just swim around her whole body, just forever just swimming around.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. The, uh, the internal or- the internal organs uh, for the Rosechus are pretty much the same thing, so I'd say pre- about, uh, as good chance as most any other mammal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, so you mean she's able to control her density a little bit more. She- I understand now. She's able to control more her density from the 90% water. Okay. That pretty much answers it just perfectly. That's been bothering me at work. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I got another question, Chris, about this whole sexual thing. I mean, this is a children's comic, right? Why is there so much sex in it?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. It's called romance, and my- and my- if you'll notice throughout the comics my best pieces of artwork among which were those where dey were kissing and making out. Romantic moments.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a hidden page-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' And because- and because- and because of the tension from, uh, the trolls and Encyclopedia Dramatica, I just felt like doing that in protest against them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, but childre-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' Yes but how is that really a protest? That, you know, you know, are, are you like referencing to the 60's when women burned their bras? That was in protes- That was feminism. Saying that they weren't slaves to men. Do you even understand the whole thing?<br />
<br>''[Multiple voices are heard at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Now, to tell you the truth, I never really thought about, I never really thought about that when I-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Chris]'' Then how is, stripping was, how was that protest-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Jack]'' It shows that they have vaginas and NOT dicks. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well you know the dick thing was the fact that they were just, you know, mocking you. I think you went overboard with that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well maybe I did. Maybe I did. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, you did, because that seems kind of excessive, kind of-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' I don't think they would have even bothered to write about an article about you if you didn't just keep reacting like that.<br />
<br />
===Chris justifies sex in a kids' comic===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I have another question.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The point some of us are trying to make is, if it's TV-Y7 that means there should really be no sex in it at all.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible over other people]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's pretty much incorrect, I mean, uh, there's so many romantic anime that's TV-Y7, and they shoul- they have making out.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, a lot of things in Japan, Japan has stricter standards-not stricter, I mean looser guidelines than America. It's much different.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear ya.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I was just wondering what Bubbles, um, she has a, that water whirlwind attack, I was just curious if you had any plans to make- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Butting in]'' By the way, that was a Whirl- Whirlpool.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font>Yeah, Whirlpool, sorry, sorry, Whirlpool, but do you have any plans to mix an, uh, Electric-type attack with that, since water conducts electricity, right? It could be a very powerful-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah, she did, she did an electric attack amongst the- the walls of that Whirlpool and she let out. In case you didn't know, there's a- little bits of lightning bolts among which-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, oh, I'm sor- I didn't notice that, I'm sorry, I'll go take another look. Thank you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hey Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> You make some pretty sweet Little Big Planet levels.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you.<br />
<br />
===Chris on Benadryl babysitting===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, there's a message from Cogs on the side, it's about, uh, do women not have the right to vote already in CWCville.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, evry- Everybody, no matter what age, no matter what gender or race, everybody has the right to vote in CWCville. Even if they're black.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Then what's up with the "Votes for Women" thing, I was-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Not just vote women, but- ''[interrupted]'' any other ethnicities, and gays?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't understand-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did that- heard it in Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What? Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, man, Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, yeah, that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's a classic. It's my favorite movie of all time.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that movie was, like, based in the 1900s.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but still I- still I agreed with that message there-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Taken out of context, that makes it seem like CWCville's set in the 1960s.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What message? That children should be given cough medicine so they'll go to sleep?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''What?''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that's what women used to do back in- That's what mothers, friggin' nurses and stuff used to do to kids in the 1900s, is give children, like, you know, cough medicine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Cause- cause the medicine- uh, correction, the medicine did not put them to sleep, there was a lullaby, not the cough medicine. They only had to take the cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ...because it rained, before dere, and it was not, and it was to, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Rain means cough medicine doesn't have anything to do with each other. That's not how friggin' germs are spread, or colds are gotten. Colds are gotten through germs, not the rain.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How is cough medicine any different from today's parents that just let their kids watch TV until they fall asleep? I mean, it's just as bad.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well- Cough medicine has a lot to do with the psychological effects of it. Obviously if you get- if you keep giving fre-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Thanks, Samantha, that was delicious.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's my, uh, Samantha-<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, that's we're all saying, cause I've heard that there's a lot of different chemicals in cough medicine. You could pick up a ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I don't even take cough medicine, because I'm not a pussy.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Anyway, I never put any references, I never did any references or plan any references to cough medicine or anything of that sort.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Well, Chris, Cassie says the last e-mail she got from you was on the 17th. How 'bout your being gay? Is that true?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[sigh]'' That wa- That was somebody had- That was Clyde hacking through my e-mail and spammed that to my contacts.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, I definitely did not do that-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You're a scoundrel-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -a slanderous lie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I did not do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Whoa-whoa-whoa. Wow. Well, thanks for that. She was worried that you were- that you don't like her.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> You're a scoundrel, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't do that. That was someone else.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I was wondering, because I've heard other news too, I was really hoping that you weren't gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Believe me, I'm straight.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I'll take your word for it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you. And, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Cogs- Cogs got a way- she showed us that, okay? I mean, you only ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br />
===Chris's fail-riffic Spanish===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So, Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, Screwhead's from Mexico. I heard you like Spanish, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hola, Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You know Spanish, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí. Conoso Mexico. Tomé dos años ''[unclear]'' mi escuela secundaria. (Yes, I know Mexico. I took two years [in, possibly] my secondary school.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has venido en Mexico? (Have you come to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, lo siento? (Uh, I'm sorry?)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has estado en Mexico? (Have you been to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Estoy Mexico? No. (I am Mexico? No.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[slowly]'' Has estado, um, in Mexico. Has venir? (Have you been to Mexico? Have gone?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Uh, no, I hav- no, no tengo pansars. ''[sic]'' (no, I don't have pansars (?))<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I think, uh, I think I meant to say- I'm pretty sure-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Did you just say you don't wear pants?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, no, I was trying to say, ah, I don't have plans to go in Mexico at the moment.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's what I understood what he was saying there.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, did you know that, that 4-cent garbage website is located in Mexico?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> That's why-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, that's why they can't get it shut down.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]'' borders, plus it's cheaper to run sites over there; they have, like, several servers.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wanted to talk to you, but she couldn't make it here, well, and, she wants to be your Spanish teacher, because she says that you've got room to improve your Spanish.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Oh, that Cassie. Yeah, I'm sorry, I thought you were- I got mixed up. Um... Yeah, um, I'm sorry, I, uh, I haven't talked to that- I haven't talked to Cassie in a while, but I've been mostly talking to, uh, her gal- her, uh, gal-pal and I'm sure- I'm sure she'd tell you a lot about her...<br />
<br />
===In which the trolls discuss bar fights===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey Chris, how- how does Sonichu keep Rosechu from spending more than a hundred dollars at the mall? I've always wondered how he could manage to do that. I've always had problems with that myself.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That wa- That time at the mall, it was, uh, Kel loaned the credit card. And it's like, yeah- she gave- she gave Sonichu the responsibility of that credit card. She did.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I've always given my advice on cannabis, you should do the ''[unintelligible]'', Cogs Chris, but I think she wants your response.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, one of my friends sent me this picture, and I think you might find it kinda disturbing just because they say it's proof that you're gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Aw yeah, I saw that, that's just a crappy Photoshop.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No, that one doesn't- this one doesn't look Photoshopped at all.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'm not gonna look at it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Oh, you're not? Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, uh, you say you're against smoking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. As a matter of fact, CWCville is a smoke-free, non-alcoholic city.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[partially drowned out]'' That's what we call a totalitarian state...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, and, uh, in the pilot episode with Seth MacFarlane, of, you know, Family Guy? He's always smoking. What do you think about that?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Go smoke.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I just- I just take that with a grain of salt, and, uh, you know, that's what-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, if he can smoke, why can't anyone else? I mean, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Because it causes cancer!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> So does a lot of things.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> It could be a prop pipe.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> In any case, I'm not- in any, in any case I've never done it and I never will.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, but eating too much fast food can give you a heart attack. I mean... so many things are deadly for you.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What about fast food, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> My father used to smoke and he went through a whole bunch of heart attacks. He suffered three- <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Well, I think that might have to do more with his weight.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He suffered through three or four triple bypasses.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I think that's... that's more like a weight issue.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He has a pacemaker!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, eh...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey ya guys, leave him alone. Ya know, my granddad, he smoked most of his life. He quit for 25 years and still died of lung cancer. I mean that's just the way it is. And your body never gets rid of it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, what about ''[pause]'' Chris, what about fast food? That's- that's bad for you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey Chris. Chris, could you do me a favor and send an email to Cassie? She's very worried about you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Yeah sure, I'll send her an email later.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, thanks.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, I've got uh, a certain someone you know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No no.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -she has to, uh, she wants to ask you w- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Also, she said something about some hair.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh yeah. Yeah, that's uh... that's another issue right there. Um, hmmm. I'll talk to her about that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, does, uh, drinking cause cancer?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, but it causes liver dysfunction and likely bar fights and automobile accidents.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, bar fights, but— <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Bar fights!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> -but I don't think that bar fights are that big of a problem.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I think bar fights are awesome.<br />
<br>''[People agree bar fights are awesome]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> But bar fights are bad. I got into a bar fight once and one of my hands got cut and two fingers from my left hand. Bar fights suck.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well, I think that might be more because you're Mexican. Are you sure you didn't lose them picking bo- picking grapes and- or something?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> No, Mexican people are more more- more much macho man; we get into bigger fights. We're more awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No- I think it might be because you got your hands stuck in some machinery when you were out picking in the vineyards.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't know about you guys, but I like- I like having bar fights.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Crashes Due To Math===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't have to be drunk to be in a bar fight or in an automobile accident, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but they increase the likeliness of it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You've been in an autobile— automobile accident, I mean, were you drunk?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I was distracted.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Uh, by what? I mean, it's kinda hard to be dist— you gotta be focused on driving man-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I was doing math in my head.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, math in your— <br />
<br>[Trolls talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> My mind got distracted by being its own calculator.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Are you good at math?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, is that for school?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Are you some kind of savant?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's impossible.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Guys, you're getting ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you like a mathematic genius or something?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> You know some artist people have like superpowers in their head. They can do like geniuses and add really well. ''[interrupted briefly by Jack saying something else about savant]'' Chris you are already an artist. Do you have any like, magical powers?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, I heard autistic people are really good at math. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Well not all the stereo- some of that sounds like stereotypes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[talking over Chris]'' ...it has to do with mental ability; I mean, what's the...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean I don't know- I mean I'm not saying that I'm a total genius. I mean I know- I know enough to get by.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What's the highest level of math you've taken Chris?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> College level.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I mean like algebra, or calculus or...?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. I believe I just did trigonometry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Very impressive.<br />
<br>[long pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So I was wondering. When did you get the CAD degree? I figured it's like a fine arts degree or something? I mean wha-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I designed a whole- I designed buildings and machinery and such along there. I designed the whole CWCVille shopping center.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don't you have a job then?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Your fans would love to see that Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' -I mean use that to design like, actual buildings? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I think I just told you I designed the CWCVille sho-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I don't mean in your comic. I'm just saying-<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde Isn't Popular And Chris Should Program===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well it's a good st-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So I heard you got some nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'll be putting an update on da YouTube soon, but not right now. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking maybe you could like, you know, get a degree in game design and make the Sonichu game? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah man, it's not that hard to learn programming. C++ man.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">''Falsion:'''</font> Clyde, he hates you, why are you talking?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm just giving him some advice, I mean C++ is-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you here? We don't like you. You totally ruined Chris's life.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't ruin his life. He ruined his own life.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yes you did. You've ruined his life. You raped his girlfriend. <br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks at once over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If he was the man he said he was, he'd have gone to Nintendo, made all that money. How- how are you going to make money now Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Time will tell.<br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks again]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, time will tell Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font>''[unclear]'' -need a plan, you know? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking uh, if- uh- would you be interested in getting a degree in game design. Making the game or something? Like if you had to? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Maybe but uh- I still have things to sort out in my real life.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah it's kinda unfortunate what happened with the Nintendo thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah- hang on a second, I'll be right back. Mm- ''[clattering]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So be honest guys am I really that much of a bother. I mean...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah you kind of are.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like a total dickfart.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You realize weed causes cancer? <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I didn't know that. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> And it causes the munchies. You're gonna get fat, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's okay, man, because I work out.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Do you play Guitar Hero standing up?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I play Guitar Hero while on the treadmill. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Will the Sonichu game be a- ''[muffled]'' -or a Wii one?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> It be a Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Wii would like to play. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh. I only got a DS. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I heard you are very good at HTML. Why don't you make a HTML Sonichu game? That would be awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't think you can make a game in HTML.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A- anyway I came back...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris? How many courses did you have to take to get that degree in CAD? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -pretty sure you can make a game in HTML-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[speaking over]'' I'm took abo- took about two- took about two years to four years. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, if you can write HTML you can write C++, make your own games. Pretty simple man. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well it's something I'll consider. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde why are you talking to him? He hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm trying to give him some suggestions. I'm not insulting him, OK? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> HTML seems kinda outdated, so to speak. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font>I learn- I took two HTML classes so at least I know how to do- at least I know the ins and outs when it comes to like, workin' on it in the raw data- in the notepad.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> So you don't use Dreamweaver?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I also use Net- also use Netscape composer. <br />
<br>''[Someone starts singing 'Dreamweaver']''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I heard they went bankrupt or something.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't- I don- I don't listen to news because I don't care about bad news. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But that's not bad news that's just safety...<br />
<br>''[Talking over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why you gotta bring this bad vibe in here? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> OK OK I'll chill, I'm sorry it's just my wife- ''[can't hear over Chris typing extremely loud]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris you don't hear about these ones in a while. Like yesterday some guy in my town got run over by a train and he- he died. And that's a really bad thing, you know but you have to hear about it. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yeah but that's because you're Mexican. You Mexicans always play around the train tracks, what's with you? <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No come on, don't be racist.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> It's because Mexicans are stupid. I'm surprised I can use a computer. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' CrassCrab why do you have to be so mean?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> 'Cause my mother was raped by a Mexican. And I'm part Me- ''[muffled]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry man.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> That isn't fair to take it out on every other Mexican out there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His rule applied to millions. Just ignore him.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No I'm not my mother was raped by Mexicans.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> CrassCrab I'm tired of listening to you, get out of here. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Not all Mexicans are like that we- we- I am as Mexican guy. Not all Mexican guys are- ''[drowned out by typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't get me started on them. But that will be another day. Cause I'm sick of hearing bad news.<br />
<br />
===Chris Types Fast (And Hates Hex-Box)===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris what are you uh- typing there?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm typing a email. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> How many words can you type? How fast can you type? Sounding fast there. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhh say about uh- sorta between thirty and a hundred. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's quite a good range man. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like "The Flash", minus the red jump-suit.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh Chris um- I was wondering- ''[unclear]'' -would it be uh a Wii game or a DS game or both. I only own DS and I don't have any money for a Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[overlapping]'' Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wii, DS and Pla- hopefully uh- possibly uh, PlayStation 2 or 3. Never on [[Hex_Box|Hex-Box]]. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> When you gonna do this shit?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Why don't you like the Hex-Box? I mean I have an Xbox, I would love to play online with you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'd like to say this. Before Chris says anything about that I just wanna say that today my wife came home from the mall shopping for her usual clothes, that Gucci purse I had to buy for her. You know what she came home with? I wanted a PS3 but you know what she gave me was a frickin' Xbox 360. The Elite one? ''[someone speaks over]'' I know, I kept telling her like "Honey this isn't what I wanted. I wanted the PlayStation 3 so I can play LittleBigPlanet, Metal Gear Solid and Sonic Unleashed" <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You can put Sonic Unleashed on the Hex Box as well as Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Too whiny to make out]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Nintendo just- rejected your offer? Cause I- I heard a rumor that there was going to be a Sonichu game or something. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris uh. Cassie wants you to send her your Wii number so she can talk to you on the Wii. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright uhhhhh. I'll get- have to get my Wii number now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Send it to her in an email please.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they completely hate Sony. And they hate Microsoft as well. I mean this guy, Reggie? He always talks about kicking their ass and stuff. He's kinda crazy. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I know. Reggie's very mean he never brought out ''[unclear]'' to America. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah I wanted to play that game.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talked over]'' -I'm tellin' you guys. Reggie's just a great ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Like what?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can- I can't say anything OK but... you'll see. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah so I don't think like if you got the deal with Nintendo I don't think they'd put it on like mu- like anything else but the Wii or DS. Yeah, cause that Reggie guy he frickin' hates Sony. And Microsoft. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font>Wasn't he also the head of VH1?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or Pizza Hut.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. What are your favorite places to eat at? <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember um he ''[unclear]'' -but before that he was with Sega when Dreamcast was out. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yup. Let me type this email please. I mean y'all keep talking I'll just listen. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's no reason to hate the Xbox. Let's be honest.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or um- Chris um- do you wanna release your game on Nintendo and on Sony. If you do talk to somebody like EA or something, you can like do um- multi-console thing like a (?) party thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[busy typing]'' Hmm. Well it's all to think about. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I mean Sega does third party now so um- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah well I'm gonna keep typing this email here. Y'all keep talking. <br />
<br>''[Sound of Chris typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's true, it's true. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Chris I wanted to tell you that Cassie's going to be here any- any second so you can talk to her. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Hm. ''[continues typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Don't you care about her? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[annoyed]'' I'm typin' da email to her right now! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah um 360 is pretty bad um- it red-rings all the time. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> I've had mine over two years. The same one. And it has not red-ringed yet. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Dude you have to pay $50 just so you can play online. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[echoing]'' Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah it's bullshit.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah it's totally free on PlayStation. And Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris. Chris. No, no, no, no, I gotta talk about this. [long pause] Chris...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupting]'' I get less connection problems myself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can't let you get away with this Chris. You spent over $1000 on the PlayStation Network. OK? And you say you can't afford $50 for the Xbox? Terrible reason. That's a terrible reason. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, um, Cogs I had a friend of mine whose red-ringed a lot of times. She did not like it at all. She got herself a PS3 instead. <br />
<br>''[Chris is STILL typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I heard that like- the PS triple eats up a lot of energy and like- has like- burned houses down. Cause it messes up the- no but the PS3 really- <br />
<br>''[More of Chris typing then audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So when's the next comic coming out Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I can't say. I don't have a date for it right now. I've been busy with the- with real life and such. You know getting the s- getting the website back up and all that. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh but I've been waiting so long. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I gotta tell you something Chris. ''[unclear]'' -to the trolls but I haven't done anythin' myself. It's run off into splinter groups doin' stuff to you. Ever since the Panda thing, I haven't done anything to you man. Everybody's been running round doing things. I have no control anymore. So I'm back here. This is why I'm back here. Do you understand? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. I hear you.<br />
<br />
===Nudes On YouTube===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I hear you got some uh- nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> What? <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hear you got some nudes on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> NUDES!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> That's what I thought- I have nothing na- I have nothing like that on the nu- on the YouTube. I've nothing like that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh someone posted the pics form the ED page. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> They're just tryin' ta get on- they're just tryin' ta get on my nerves again. But I'm not gonna let 'em.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Did you take those pictures or what? Where'd they come from?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Uh, are they Photoshopped?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah most of- Yes. Most of them are Photoshopped.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I can help you with ED. Chris I can help you with ED.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You can see the neck and the body doesn't quite match up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, Chris. Cassie's just arrived. She's a little nervous about talking to you, but she's gonna talk to you soon. Is that OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I just got one quick comment. The ED people were in contact with me, but I've lost contact with them. But I know you can delete that page permanently. I'm tryin' to help you man. You can get that page down forever. Even the entire site. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What, after you raped uhm- Sarah? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I'm trying to make amends. So let me do my business. All right?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's too late to make amends. Look what you did. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um. Cogsdev said she had a look at the data, they have it up in Image editing software.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah. Well...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I don't know what to tell you there. <br />
<br>''[Several trolls speak at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Doesn't that mean they're real? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I don't think so. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You don't think so?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Well, did you take them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Then where did those pictures come from? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who took those?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I don't know. And I'd rather not talk about that anymore. It's making me feel uncomfortable.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Are you lying to your fans Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> We don't feel confort- we don't feel comfortable. We're big fans of your work and we don't like being lied to. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I'd like to make a point. It might just be a doppelganger [sic].<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, you know the thing I hate most is lies. I like to spread the truth about you Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You say you're honest, but you're lying to us.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[clearly annoyed]'' Fine, fine. Some those pictures are real. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Some of them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Some of them but not all of them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Like, which ones aren't real?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'd rather not go into detail because I'd rather not look at 'em. Cause uh- ''[interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' -are you ashamed of it?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Do you not like to look in the mirror?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You owe it- you owe it to your fans.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, but- yeah, but- yeah, but upon looking at those it's like ref- it's like reflecting a pe- uh p- a past moment in my life where I- I was played for the fool. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah, by the man in the pickle suit?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh that guy- I hate that guy.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah I saw- he was trolling some other people you know? So you're not alone, Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he took pictures of me like that too...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That guy's an asshole, I hate him.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhhh yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He took pictures of my wife too. Sick bastard. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[I think she says he is a peanut]''<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br>[another pause]<br />
<br />
===Chris Hates Harry===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I just uh- never was fond of it. Ever since it came out, I was never fond of it. ''[unclear as troll speaks over]'' -just like I hate Harry Potter because he's s- he's goin- he's uh- in compe- was in competition against the world of Pokemon. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Well that- that doesn't make sense. But they're two different medias. Pokemon-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah but- yeah but still he-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> -Harry Potter is a book.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah but he poses as competition against them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> That's not really competition. I mean- <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talks over Jack]'' Oh that reminds me about books- Vivi- Vivian wrote a book and sent it to you. You never read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes. I am afraid I- yeah, yeah- I'm uh- I've been uh- so I've been under uh- too much stress between internet and all that. I'll ge- I'll read it, I'll read it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's been waiting for your response for quite a long time.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I like the cover. (pause) Nice cover.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he is right about that. That is a nice cover. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah the book is pretty good- I read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Well I- I will definitely make it a point to uh- read it. Very soon. <br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Audible over the others]'' Did you ever read Twilight?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I've heard th- I've heard Twilight and I've seen the trailer but I haven't seen the movie, I'll wait for it to come out DVD or Blu-ray.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br />
===Random Access Humor Python Style===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh OK, I heard a lot of girls like Twilight. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I see. Hey Polly does your voice sound like that, 'cause it sounds like [[BlueSpike|a guy talking falsetto]]. I mean no personal offense. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> That's not very nice...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm sorry. Believe me I didn't mean any pe- anything personal it's just like, you know- hm- kind- just kinda takes me by surprise a bit, that's all.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I knew a girl like that in high school.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Sounding upset]'' I can't help it if I'm born like this.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I'm- I'm- I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah she's a girl. I saw her pics. She's a girl.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I'll s- I'll take his word for it. I'm sorry I cu- I accused you there.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um. OK. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You know, aut- I mean- let's- it's just uh- you know it's uh- you know it's uh a bit- just a spot of fun. [[Random-access_humor|Stupid humor]]. Monty Python's Flying Circus. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> We know you love that. There's just so many references to it in the comic. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah I d- after they put all of the entire series on PlayStation Network I downloaded the Hamlet episode- that was the one that had uh- Jimmy Hill parodying himself. It also had this funny bit where it was like, you know- ''[in a stupid voice]'' "...and now it's time for The Robinsons, an everyday story about blah-de-blah-de-blah-de-blah. Dum-de-dum-de-dum-de-duhhh-dum-de-dum"- and so on...<br />
<br>''[A troll begins to speak but is interrupted by a very high-pitched Chris]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> "Morning Mrs. Robinson- Morning Mrs. Robinson. Comin' out shoppin'? Oh- you've been shoppin', what did you buy? What's this?-" 'What did you buy this for?'[Trolls laugh over him]'' -It was a bargain!"<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I've heard you do that before. I don't know where. Anyway uh- uhm- Whatever happened to Jimmy Hill? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I haven't heard from him in a long time so just assuming uh- he gave up or uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I think he got a- I think he got a, uh- children's TV program in England.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well he ain't botherin' me, so I'm not worried about him anymore.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Ye- but he's stealing Sonichu. Bastardizing it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah he did but uh- he s- but haven't seen any updates on his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' -profile, he's still doing it.<br />
<br>''[Several trolls talk over each other about him having a TV show]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Fails At Spanish Pt. 2===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' <br />
<br>''[Troll says something more about the TV show, but it's muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wants to say hi. Just forgive her English because she can't speak very well, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> All right. Just sent her the email by the way, just now. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Hey, Chris. It's me, Cassie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi, Cassie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Fine, and you?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm feelin' OK. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Why haven't you emailed me? I was really about-was really worried about you. What's happened? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry. I be- I've bee- I've been busy with the Internet and the stress and all that. I sent ya an email just now go- it's got my Wii number in it so you can add me to your contacts. I've been talking to uh- I've been talking to Sarah lot- quite a bit lately. She's been helping me with uh- updating the Sonichu site, since I've uh- since I'm working on uh- it's re-uploading and such. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Kay, I believe you. I going to check ''[pronounced like 'sheg']'' it, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You're going to where?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[very quietly]'' Check it.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> To check it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> To "shag-it"? Is that the-<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Check the email. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[still doesn't understand]'' Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> I going to check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, check email. ''[Laughs]'' Yeah I'm sorry I tr- I tried to uh- understand but it just kind of messed up a little bit. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don- why don't you two speak in Spanish?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhh. I'm not exactly fluent. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ¿Sabes hablar español, Chris? (Do you know how to speak Spanish?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí, hablo español. (Yes, I speak Spanish)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Oh. ''[pause, one of the trolls says something to her]'' Oh, eso es muy sexy. (That is very sexy.)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Ohhhh. Te gusta. Te gusta muchísimo, (You like it. You like it a lot)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> La verdad, si. (To tell you the truth, yes)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Me amos mis amigas muchísimas. Sons muy bueñas! (I love my friends (feminine) a lot. They are very good.) [Correction: Amo a mis amigas muchísimo. Son muy buenas.] <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Oh, eso es tan cool en español! Muy bueno! (That's so cool in Spanish! Very good)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Muy bueño (very good)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Aha, exacto. (it is!)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]'' Okay, that's good. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Well, I going down, okay?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Okay, you're going down- by the way, let me ask ya Cassie, do you ever- you've uh- you've actually met uh Sarah May in person, haven't you? <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Not. She's on Internet.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Okay. That's cool- but anyway uh- you got- you d- you have my Wii number, uh- you can reply the email with your Wii number and it'll be registered on the Wii network. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[very haltingly]'' Yes. So. Cool. Talk with you Chris. You are so cool. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Heh. Uhhhh. You flatter me. Tú me flatteray. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[Weak laugh]'' Well, see you. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[In his 'baby voice']'' Adiós. ''[sigh]'' <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós, bebé.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós, chiquita bonita. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>[Pause as audio cuts out]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -it again. <br />
<br>[Another pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So anyway, Chris. I've been working on Rabbichoso for a day and uh- I was just wonderin' like, it's- it's supposed to compete with the Sonichu, you know? If you weren't aware of that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhhh. I grabbed onto d- grabbed onto g I- grabbed onto the... that gist. I'm aware- I'm aware of the gist of the theory. Uh. I'm aw- I'm aware that you're- that you're tryin' to compete. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know what competition does. It's drives uh- it drives consumer interest- Well that's why you know- It's great. You have to compete with high quality things. ''[muffled]''- that's why I'm trying to help. You know, compete. Just so you're aware of this, OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I see. -see. <br />
<br>[Pause]<br />
<br />
===Rabbichoso And Animu===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris we've been ge- been getting uh threatening images from the Pickle Man. Did you s- did you see the left? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I've not heard from the Pickle Man in lo- in a long time. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Apparently there are multiple ones because this one is, uh, not a darkie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh-huh. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> It's good that they're leaving you alone now. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Seems like they found more easier targets. Seeing as how you became [[Navy|saltier]].<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh. You know I originally got that line- quote from an e- ep- episode of ExCel Saga. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> From what?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> ExCel Saga.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Oh, ExCel Saga. Oh, yeah, that's a good anime.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> AIII I-Falazzo! (''He means [[ScotPalazzo|Il-Palazzo]]'')<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, have you ever seen two animes, ''[muffled]'' and Schooldays?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I have not seen either of those. I like Steel Angel Kurumi as well.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, how much Japanese do you know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only a little bit. I'm not totally fluent. I can say that with all honesty. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something unintelligible, not quite Japanese]''<!-- It sounds like he's saying "You say you can't- can you speak with me?" in CHINESE. --><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Huh?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Never mind, you won't understand it.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[unclear] Chris-Chan. Genki desu-ka?''<br />
<br />
===Chris Could Kill Clyde===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, I just wanted to say, uh, you're doing a good job, like, keeping calm even though Clyde is here. I mean u- I thought you'd be, like, more angry at him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm being calm with you guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> -I would have been choking him by now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I'd have kicked his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Preach to the choir. Pr- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I'd make him choke on a pickle if it were up to me.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You guys can't touch me otherwise I'd kick all your asses. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, bring it.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris could kick Clyde's ass anytime.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Let's see Chris do it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Bring it to me any day of the week and I'll definitely show him a hard- day's night. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah I think you could kick his ass.<br />
<br>[Trolls and Clyde talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Sings]'' -been a hard day's night...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -never mind, just...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean that as a- meant that as in I would beat... him up. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Kick his ass?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm very strong. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. I'm gonna see you later, OK?<br />
<br>''[Unison of goodbyes]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> OK see ya. Thank you so much Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[ignoring his fans]'' Yeah I can- I can lift about my weight. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Like um- if Clyde were right in front of you, what would you do to him?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Like, what kind of style of fighting do you have?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, shut up.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I gotta know my competition. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Personal- in the physical offense. ''[sigh]'' I would definitely be giving you so much physical pain. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's not a s- that's not a style. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I would beat you up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He deserves it man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, that's still not a style...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He uses fisticuffs. He's a gentleman. Gentleman fisticuffs. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Whatever, I'll just see-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Stop arguing and just-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ''[Over previous troll]'' I mean, if he did that to my sweetheart I'd fucking kill him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well. He's not- he's not going to come over and kill me, I know that. He doesn't have the money. [pause] You know I'm surprised that you're mad here. You're much kinder in person I thought you- Now I'm just expecting you at my door anytime, just waiting for you to stand here with an axe or something. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Knives are too messy. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Ah, now a sword- sword's are usually better.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What about poison?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Poison's good, poison's good.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde, what- do you want him to beat your ass?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I was just expecting it, you know.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, you know what's another thing? I would definitely not tell you how I would be hurting you, but I would definitely give you a who- big amount of pain. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, he's gonna keep you guessin'!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he deserves it. After everything he's done-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Muffled by troll]'' -going to kill me, I'd like to know. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I'm just going to let you cover in- worry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh so you're never going to show up, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Oh yes I will show up. But you just won't be expecting it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't even know where I live, do you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Find out!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Maybe I should give you my address. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, you should track him down and kick his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> But I'm going to leave you guessing too...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Defend Panda's h- Panda's honor.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, hi Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> 'sup Julie.<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br>''[Everyone talks over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde's A Dick===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I notice her mic doesn't work. But still I'm just letting her know that- acknowledge her presence. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're doing well staying calm even though Clyde's here.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, Clyde's a total dick.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Fucker.<br />
<br>''[Rustling]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I mean, he's taken over everything. The IRC. This. I can't- no one can stop him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' -over there, so...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll:'''</font> I- I like Rabbichoso.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Of course you do. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll''':</font> It's funny. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I will not offer any new comment on it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, OK. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, when can we expect the next Sonichu to be released.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, we've been eager.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It'll be soon. It will be soon.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah just ignore Clyde man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean if you're going to put a hard date on it, you'd better deliver your promise. If you don't, I'll strike harder. That's all I'm saying.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. You're saying if I don't set a date, you're gonna...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no. I'm saying don't make promises you can't keep. Don't make promises you can't keep.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He'll choke you with his medallion bitch!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who the hell do you think you are?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I agree with Cogs over there. Maybe you should do just a page a day, not release all at once. Keep his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you telling him this when he hates you?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm giving him suggestions man, OK? OK?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Only thing he's gonna suggest to you is 'shut the fuck up'!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, seriously man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It's alright. <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Penny Arcade's slow.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh you mean like Penny Arcade or ''[unclear]'' or MegaTokyo?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they're just like- boring. Then they because sellouts. <br />
<br />
===Chris's Country Cookin===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Chris, where's your favorite place to eat?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. Can't really say uh- but I like country cookin'. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> What's country cooking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh no G's in the sto- no G's in the name by the way, no G. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah what's country cooking? I'm not familiar with that.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's like uh- som- something like Golden Corral. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But Golden Corral is a national franchise.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh Chris, how are your parents?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> They're OK.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br>[Long pause]<br />
<br />
===Sex Is Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I've got a sug- another suggestion. Now be quiet all of you cause I know you hate me. Just- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, Chris hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well don't defend him. He can defend himself OK? He's a man. But whatever-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let him speak.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm suggesting that- you go on and on about this sex stuff but you've never gotten laid, have you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I like to put myself in the imaginative situation that I'd like to be in and the sexual stimulation. So I can be ready for [[ego|myself]] for when I do actually have my first time.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well my first time was- I'll just say that it's terrible, OK? I didn't know what I was doing, she didn't know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let me guess, you prematurely ejaculated?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no, it's not like that you don't know what to do. Every woman's told me OK? You can't prepare-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Clyde]'' First time's always awkward...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -I learnt that mistake a while back, OK whatever. OK, you just- you can't prepare for your first time. You might as well just have a really bad first time so you learn from your mistakes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm not trying to defend Clyde or anything, but yeah it's kinda true. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Hmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The girl I first fell in love with is the girl I'm married to right now. Samantha just changed my world. But marriage does get boring.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Tips To STAY STRAIGHT===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I know how you say how important it is to stay straight, um- I'm having trouble staying straight, do you have any suggestions?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Watch a bunch of pornography with uh- with naked women. OK, a lot of naked women.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That happened to me one time...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, I have this friend I play video games with, is that gay? He's male by the way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry could you- I'm sorry could you repeat that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I have this guy I'm friends with he always comes over to my house to play video games. Is that gay? I'm kinda scared. You know? I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Hmm. Is he making any advances towards you? Personally. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I dunno how to tell. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Like uh sit- does he always sit next to you when he's playing games. Playing video games.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Yeah he usually does. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I see. Hmm. My- well- my suggestion in that case, would be to keep a heavy distance between you and that guy. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he meant anything gay by it though. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he means anything like- gay about it. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well, still- it's always best to find out- you can ask him. Don't be afraid to ask him. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> What would you do in this situation?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well if he said yes then I would uh- basically- let me think about that a moment. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you have any friends who're are like, guys?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only acquaintances and only a few of them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you play video games with people or anything? Do they come over to your house?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. No.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I remember-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> ''[Cuts Polly off]'' I'm just worried I might be gay or something. I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You probably are Falsion, but that's OK. No, look dude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Leave him alone! Leave him alone! He's straight!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Why?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Hey, let's have a calm conversation here. Let's not have any fights.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br>''[Trolls speak over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I've been reading the Sonichu comics and man, they are page-turners! Seri- I was on- I was on the edge of my seat for a while. I ju- I couldn't- I couldn't- you know. Just had to read and read.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Thank you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, can I be your friend? I know I'm a guy. I don't mean anything gay by it. Can I be your friend? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. I dunno. <br />
<br />
===A Wild Snorlax Appears===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Do you want any hotdogs?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I'm OK. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> No?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I was talking with my mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I was wondering if I could be your friend.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I h- heard you only like, you only like to be acquaintances. With guys. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, ummm. Let's just pretty much leave it at acquaintance. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hello Mrs. Chandler. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> She can't hear you, I'm wearing my earphones.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Listen, I'm not gay. I don't- you know- yeah. Never mind.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I mean- I mea- I-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What do you have against gay people? I'm serious to hear this. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's just unnatural and it's against God's will. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, it's not like it's a choice. You can't change who you are like- you're a creative guy but I mean they're just gay. They can't change that. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm just answering a few questions mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You don't have to answer. Nobody's payin' you to do that.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yes they are.<br />
<br>''[shuffling sounds, clanging]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> It ain't none of their business no-way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I wouldn't be asked questions like that by employers or anybody. Don't tell people what you d- what you think. Keep that to yourself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris what's hap- what's happening?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, obviously, my mother is offering her input.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Tell her you're just talking to some friends. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' I don't need no back talk from somebody on the other end of the phone.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear you, Mom. Hmm. Hmm. <br />
<br>''[scraping sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> These- these idiots don't have any brains or- they don't have any idea this way or that.<br />
<br>''[more banging, clanging and tumbling sounds. Sounds like washing up]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Is right now a bad time right now? I mean-<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Pixelblocks, Pixelblocks!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Someone's saying "Pixelblocks." <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you saying [[Pixelblocks]]?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>''[Chris's mom has been singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful singing voice, Chris.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[Audio cuts back in]'' -all the anxiety, causing you stress.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, well sometimes they don't; they can be peaceful.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Well, your mom and dad get the crappy end of the stick.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm, a lot of us do.<br />
<br>''[more clattering sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Yeah, just like this nasty mess over here that you guys left that I got to clean up.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm. ''[Audio cuts]'' -Yeah, I took care of my bills. I mean, not completely, but I took care of them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> What about going to, uh, Redmond?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> We! (Wii?) <br />
<br>[unintelligible, windows beeps]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[laughing]'' Yeah, sweetheart pool.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Mmhmm. ''[laughing]'' Like the other side of the pillow.<br />
<br>''[someone sighing. Clanging noises return after short absence]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' ...is all, I mean, living with your parents is okay bad-in today's bad economy, but at 26, come on. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Shut up, you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I'm being nice.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde isn't so bad a guy. He does bad things, but he's pretty cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah he's reformed. He's seen the error- Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How- how could he do that to Sarah? I mean- That's not right.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah. Well, that's like Luke... That's like Luke and Laura from General Hospital. I know that's like, before y'all's time, but, um... Luke was a rapist and she-he raped Laura and then, like, a few months later they get married. So... ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, I believe Clyde was trying to make amends from his past actions.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, but Chris, can you uh- can you forgive him?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Random Troll:'''</font> ''[whispering]'' White whale, holy grail! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Can you forgive a small-dicked Asian? Just a thought.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He's not Asian! <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm half-Asian, okay? My parents ''[unclear]'' I don't really wanna go into it. It's too bo-boring for you people. But this is why I ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you there? Just makin' sure, buddy.<br />
<br>''[clattering]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Move out.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Another Troll''':</font> Well, how do I do that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi there, my kitty. ''[In baby voice]'' Yes, there's a pretty kitty.<br />
<br>''[Someone speaking with a voice-synth]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hang on a second. I've got, like, a thousand different... Oh, Crass, why'd you do that?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Because. You can unban him but, yeah. I'm not gonna friggin' stand for that. <br />
<br>''[Sound of a vacuum cleaner]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> I (m j d?) do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I heard the "g" word.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um, is that a vacuum cleaner?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Yeah, sounds like it is.<br />
<br>[Trolls speak but are drowned out by vacuum]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ...room or something.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I think the vacuum cleaner... <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If that's the government trying to do some kind of thing, then my name's Rusty Shackleford.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's a loud fan.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I have a fan above my stove, too.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Hey... I do, too.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Wait- wha- wait. You-you-you're in the kitchen? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Me too.<br />
<br>''[possibly Sonic game sound effects]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmhm? Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I'm pretty sure it's already asked, but I didn't catch the answer. When can we expect the next Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I-I-I told you my suggestion of releasing a page a day or something. I mean, it's a pretty good one. It-it-it allows for a good time. Finish a page a day. You upload it. You know? It's very good. Works very well.<br />
<br>''[Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh. I mean- you guys keep asking when he's going to finish it but I wonder how many pages are going to be in the new one? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> The last one was like, thirty. Just release it over the span of a month. Works fine. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...go up to ninety thousand...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[mutters something]''<br />
<br>''[Sound of Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Down by the river...side.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful voice, Chris.<br />
<br>''[clattering, typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[unclear, repeating the same two phrases]'' Gone down by the river, down by the water side, down by the riverside. Down by the waterside. Down by the riverside.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember ''[unclear]''<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -I'm hungry myself.<br />
<br>''[some kind of alarm sounding]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Then go eat.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I already ate.<br />
<br />
===Anime And Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I wonder what anime Chris watches nowadays. There's not many on television but do you still watch Japanese cartoons? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[In a bad accent]'' Kawaii desu ne. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I want to watch Shuffle. He said it was very good. He said it was sad. I don't know if I wanna watch- I don't like sad stuff. I like to be happy when I watch anime.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, and um, do you watch stuff like Bleach and um Code Geass or Naruto or something?<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I'm glad to hear that Shuffle isn't sad. I'm definitely going to watch it sometime.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um, yeah Chris that was a good call on Naruto. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah there's a lot of people who don't like it much either. Too popular.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But please. Please. Hope. ''[audio cuts out briefly]'' Uh, Chris, please consider When They Cry.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Ooh, I saw that one. It was a really good series.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, I know; that was good, like- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah. Both seasons of it. <br />
<br>''[Windows beeps, voices overlapping]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I could link you to Season One if you want. Yeah, Samantha got me into that. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...you'll give it a try, Chris. It's a very, very good series.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Hm. Hey, Julie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...lots of ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Watch Shuffle. You got the six episodes of Shuffle or... Which o- which anime? I'm sorry. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh and JoJo's Bizarre Adventure is also cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I really liked JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. Very ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Za warudo!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah, I think Shuffle is quite all right. I like Heidi. She's sweet and loyal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> That's a good one. One of my favorites is Black Lagoon.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris have you ever seen La Blue Girl?<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other about different anime]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, uh, Chris can I, my, uh, I don't know if it's all right, but, like, could you like, give me an email sometime? I could, uh... recommend you to... this anime that... Polly and... Julie like to watch. They're quite- they... Oh, C-and Cogs has recommended such great anime. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[talking to his mother]'' Yeah? That's ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> As well as Julie-Julie's the person that got me into anime.<br />
<br />
===People Love Poketunes===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> -we can go into this later cause I got my headphones on. And, Mom, you know what something else? They liked your singing.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> What? I don't sing.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> That's my laugh; that's my laugh. They couldn't hear me. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They heard you. Singin'. Just now.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I can't sing!<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I'm tone deaf. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They just heard you singing, and liked your voice.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay. Did you write checks for all those bills and pack everything ''[unclear]''?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yes, Mother, I did.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You're not telling me no story?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm not telling you no story.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> OK. It's important [''inaudible''] did you pay them?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, I paid that one. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay, you have to be honest with me, 'cause, see, you're settin'...<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm being honest, I'm being honest.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> How you respond to what [we] talk about. You say you ought to something and you don't do it then that's gonna change my ideas ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay... I'll be sure to pay the remaining differences next month.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> No, this month.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I know but I couldn't pay them all with 90 dollars so there's still some left ''[sound cuts]'' ...oh, you're cooking them up here, okay, that's why you turned the fan on over the stove.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br>''[Trolls rejoice and mock Momma Chandler]''<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 1|Mumble Chat 1]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 3|Mumble Chat 3]]|}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Spanish]]<br />
==Links==<br />
*[https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBOVVDS0JtSDNvMWs Download]<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_2&diff=162994Mumble 22012-09-26T20:28:59Z<p>Irisviel: </p>
<hr />
<div>{{Articleofthenow}}<br />
[[Image:0839-MomDesi.JPG|thumb|right|180px|In Mumble 2, a Wild [[Barbara Chandler|Snorlax]] appeared.]]<br />
<br />
'''Mumble 2''' is the second [[Mumble]] chat that took place on 4 [[February 2009]]. More than an hour long.<br />
<br />
This is a more organized Q&A type chat than [[Mumble 1]]. Questions from [[Clyde]] about [[sex]] in the [[comic]] and interesting tidbits about how Chris believes sex is the same as romance. This is pretty hard hitting, with stuff like how Chris is into [[McDonald's|fast food]] yet he's against tobacco. A lot of drama involving Clyde.<br />
<br />
Length: '''1:49:17'''<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
<br />
===Notes===<br />
* Chris doesn't like Clyde because he stole his sweetheart.<br />
* Audio cuts out for a minute before Chris says: "...HYMEN!" (You broke her hymen)<br />
* Trolls claim [[Panda]] is with Clyde, Chris wants to hear her voice, they say she's busy<br />
* 'She and I WERE very close'<br />
* Chris didn't have $400-$800 to go and see Panda; claims he got this number from an airport website recommended by [[Miyamoto]]<br />
* Insists on [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] being in ''[[Animal Crossing]]''<br />
* Doesn't want to talk about his deal with them<br />
* Insists that he doesn't have to turn down his radio since his voice is louder (''it is horribly loud in the mic'')<br />
* Panda gave Clyde all of the sites, etc.<br />
* [[Sarah]] is going to be with Clyde, which Chris wants to deny<br />
* These motherfuckers keep talking over each other<br />
* Calls a troll's critique crap<br />
* [[Bubbles]] must be aroused, she isn't wet all the time<br />
* Bubbles is 90% water so does sperm just swim around forever? NO<br />
* Clyde: This is a children's comic, why so much sex?<br />
: '''Chris:''' It is romance. My best artwork is when they're making out 'romantic moments', drawn in protest to trolls. Shows that [[Rosechu]]s have vaginas, not [[duck]]s.<br />
* Admits to maybe going overboard<br />
* Trolls try to reason with him about the [[ED]] article: There wouldn't be an article if he didn't react like he does.<br />
* Trolls say that TV-Y7 means NO SEX but Chris points to romantic anime that have making out (cartoons are for kids, whatever the content).<br />
* Trolls talk about Japan being less strict about those things<br />
* Everyone gets to vote in [[CWCville]], even if they're [[Niggos|black]].<br />
* Got his idea from [[Mary Poppins]].<br />
* Troll tries to give historical background about cough medicine putting kids to sleep. Chris insists it was the lullaby that put them to sleep.<br />
* Discussion about Chris, 'gay message' sent by a troll<br />
* He calls Clyde a scoundrel<br />
* BELIEVE HIM HE IS STRAIGHT<br />
* Chris tries to speak Mexican at 20:50<br />
* Mexican speaks Mexican to him... he replies in Menglish<br />
* [[4-cent_garbage]] is located in Mexico<br />
* Someone says that he needs to improve his Mexican<br />
* Chris is against smoking, CWCville is smoke and alcohol free<br />
* Rehash of why [[tobacky]] is bad, his position on it, alcohol=bar fights<br />
* Chris's dad smoked and had several bypasses, has a pacemaker and has had heart attacks<br />
* Mention of his hair cuttings for his fans<br />
* Chris was doing math in his head, got in car crash.<br />
* Chris has taken college level math. Took trigonometry.<br />
* Trolls gang up on Clyde for stealing Panda<br />
* Time will tell when Chris will make the money he would have in the Nintendo deal<br />
* Trolls bash Clyde for his pot smoking <br />
* Chris doesn't watch news because it's bad news =(<br />
* Bashing of the Mexican<br />
* Chris can type 30 to 100 WPM, but can't type and talk at the same time<br />
* Chris says [[PSN]] is free though Clyde(?) points to the $1,000 Chris spent on PSN<br />
* Chris has been typing for 15 minutes now and it is VERY loud<br />
* Chris has been busy IRL therefore the comic release doesn't have a date<br />
* Someone points to nudes on [[YouTube]].<br />
* He does not have it on the YouTube, but he isn't going to take it anymore.<br />
* Claims some of the photos are photoshopped.<br />
* Clyde offers help to take ED page down.<br />
* Chris denies taking those pictures, doesn't want to talk about it, making him uncomfortable.<br />
* Some of the pictures are real. When questioned which ones are fake, Chris can't answer.<br />
* Chris hates Harry Potter because it was in competition with [[Pokémon]]!<br />
* Chris is too stressed to read Vivian's [[A Girl Who Brought Down the World|book]], but he likes the cover!<br />
* Polly, who has been talking the whole time is confronted by Chris who thinks she is a guy. Polly is upset. Chris apologizes.<br />
* [[Jimmy Hill]] has launched his Sonichu show<br />
* More Mexican talk at 55:10<br />
* Chris giggles and sighs happily when Cassie, another Mexican, compliments him and when she leaves he says 'Chiquita Bonita'<br />
* Rabbichoso talk (Sonichu.info)<br />
* Classic trolls are leaving Chris alone.<br />
* Chris likes Steel Angel Kurumi (''quote from [[Wikipedia:Steel Angel Kurumi|Wikipedia]]: often classified as ecchi due to the focus on fanservice and panty shots'')<br />
* Chris claims to be very strong, could beat Clyde up. Says he would show Clyde a [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force|Hard Day's Night]], and would give Clyde pain.<br />
* ShinyMarshtomp makes an appearance? Likes Rabbichoso<br />
* Chris likes to eat at [[Country Cookin]] (''like Golden Corral'')<br />
* Chris likes to imagine his first time. <br />
* Clyde says the first time is awful, Chris said it was because Clyde prematurely ejaculated<br />
* Watch porn with naked women to cure your gay<br />
* Guys sitting next to you = gay coming on to you<br />
* Falsion has been in the chat room and is afraid he is gay<br />
* A wild Snorlax appears<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
<br />
===Waiting for Chris===<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I can't wait to hear Chris! I'm a huge fan!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, goddamn these noodles are fantastic. Man, I wish I could eat like this everyday.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Have you eaten the rice balls?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no. These are noodles. These are-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Fan-fucking-tastic.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now they're all gone, it's fantastic, you know?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Sweetangie is Chris. Or, we think so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's definitely not the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm disappointed there's so many impostors out there. Kinda my fault, but, you know, if it weren't- ''[unintelligible]'' -hard to come by.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His mic was working last time he was here, just fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He usually capitalizes his words, like in every sentence.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is- I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Is it set to push to talk or something?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You better get us your email address Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah its push to talk. It's called push to talk. It's fantastic ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, just have him set it to voice activity. It works so much better that way.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Aww, he left.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> You guys are fucking idiots.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other again]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You guys scared him off by being guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, you fucking jackasses. Nice going.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Was that even the real...?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yes, that was the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He's too much of a pussy to talk.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, cause you scared him, or some- No, or he's too stupid to be.<br />
<br>''[Trolls Laugh]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Arrives===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Chris arrives, with radio playing loudly]'' Hello.<br />
<br>''[Trolls all greet him]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, now-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Why haven't you got your microphone working?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't know why my microphone [is] messed up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry, but we had an impostor here before.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm registered. I've got myself registered now. So, uh, hopefully-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> That's probably why. It had to like, uh- calibrate.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Well, I'm calibrated now.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So, Chris, have you seen Rabbichoso, it's fantastic.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't give a crap about your stupid pencil sketch.<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am not listening. I do not have to listen to ''you''.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Why, I'm not understanding [inaudible]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well for one thing,and I'll say it on here, you stole my sweetheart!<br />
<br>''[Cutout continues]''<br />
<br />
===PandaHalo, Trip to Redmond and Animal Crossing===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You broke her hymen!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I know it's a terrible mistake, but I plan to make it up to her. I'm getting married and uh- I'm doing the things I should do.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh and another thing, if she is really over there with you now, then put her on the mic. Please.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> She's not- He never said-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, Chris, she's very busy, OK. She's very busy.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's not over here right now. Okay? So lets drop it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, fine. Well could you tell her to please send me a message lettin' me know, for sure, so I can know- so I can know to-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' I'll let her know whatever you want, but it's her life. She doesn't have to send you a message. You failed her. You failed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' She and I were very close.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If you we're so close, then why didn't you go?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' Because I had- Aw, hang on a second. How do I- oh, that's right. This thing. Right. Mmm. Hold on a sec. Oh yeah, because I did not have four to eight hundred dollars!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It doesn't cost that much to go cross-country man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes it does. I know, I saw it on an airport website. Where I was be- Where I was- recommended to me by Mr. Miyamoto.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, you can drive there. It's not that hard.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened with that? I thought, um, didn't you have a deal with them or something? I heard a rumor that your characters were going to be in Animal Crossing.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, they are in Animal Crossing. And I did- and I do- I did have a deal with them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened though?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' I'd rather not say.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Radio, Clyde and Criticism===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, why don't you turn down the TV? It's hard to hear you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Annoyed sigh]'' I do not have a TV turned on in here.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I can hear it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have a radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I hear something in the background.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Burping throughout sentence]'' Well that's the- that would b- the radio. And it is not that loud.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But it shows up pretty well on your microphone mic. With due respect.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But still, my voice is louder than the radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Ah goo- ahh given.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh, Chris? Uh, when are you going to do the new Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something over Polly]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' Uh, I'll answer Polly's question. I'm not sure. It's, uh, it's in progress right now, I'm drawing it up.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I can't wait to read it!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Well, we'll see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Listen, Clyde kind of has admin on here, so we can't really do anything about him. So, yeah. I don't know.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Hard to hear over Chris's radio]'' ...with you guys. I love you guys. Just as much as Chris loves you guys. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I was angry. I was angry. But I'm calm now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't try to hurt any other person from now on.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm doing the best I can. I'm doing the best I can.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have much- I do not have much to say in response to that right now. Because I'm ticked off.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't let him get to you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're no better than he is, if you give in.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris, I just wanted to let you know I'm a huge fan of the comics, and I'm glad you keep doing what you're doing. You're doing a great job, and just keep it up, alright man?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, yeah, I appreciate the, uh, what's the word I'm looking for? The, the, uh- well, the encouraging words. Encouragement. I appreciate the encouragement. Well, there are things, uh- I- er- current events I do not appreciate. I appreciate the positive encouragement.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I can't really do anything. He took over the IRC channel. I used to be the owner. I mean Clyde. He's like taking over everything.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, it was because Panda gave it to me, you know. But anyway, I mean, you can't just listen to encouragement, you've got to listen to criticism, man. Criticisms are what make you better, you learn from your mistakes. You learn from mistakes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Be right back guys, my wife is calling.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I don't- I don't- Tons of people don't like the Rabbichoso art style, but you know, I gotta improve on that. That's something I plan to improve on. There's a lot of criticism in the death of Sonichu, right? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What? What did you just say?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a lot of criticism of Sonichu. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. For a moment there I thought you said something different.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What, what did you think I said? I'm just saying, there are people who like it and people who don't like it. You gotta start taking in those suggestions. You know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. So many things that will be improved upon. But, I just have to hear from Sarah herself that she really is going to be with you, Clyde. I have to hear it from herself. It's one thing to hear it from you and then it's- then on that note, it's just I find it very hard to believe. So I have to hear it from her.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I kinda think that Rabbichoso sucks. I mean, I think it could be funny, but it honestly looks like it's drawn by a kindergartner.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, Sonichu has evolved over the years. You can see that the art's getting better. Rabbichoso doesn't even look like something a beginner would do, honestly. I mean, ''[Interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A whole bunch of crap!<br />
<br>''[Everyone starts talking at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, Sonichu is in color.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I know, I accept his criticism. But you just called it crap! Now that's just rude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have emotions going behind me- uh, behind that opinion.<br />
<br />
===Cassie===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, did you get my message.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Aren't you going to be the gentleman, then? Aren't you gonna be the gentleman?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I just want to ask you, Chris. I'm Cassie's friend. She- she's worried sick about you. Why haven't you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did email her! As a- I- I haven't gotten any re-plies from her. I have emailed her and I have instant messaged her on A.I.M. and Skype. I haven't heard back from her. I don't know what's going on there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> ...you emailed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> When was the last time you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, hang on, I'll check.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris? I have a question. My fa- One of my favorite new characters is, um, Simonla, and like, I also like Zapina as well. Um, are they gonna have bigger parts in the series later on?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, could you repeat that question?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I was wondering if Simonla and Zapina will either have bigger parts in the series later on. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [[Sonichu_10#The_Final_Countdown|Possibly]]. Possibly, but, uh, I can't say for sure. Oh, and, uh, to answer your question, uh- in answer to, uh, I believe, uh, Screwhead, who asked? It was about four days ago. About four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Yeah. Four days ago? Okay, I'll tell her to check it out.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> The last email I sent was about four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> She'll contact you in a while, though.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I'll tell her to check it out and- and thanks Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright. Mm.<br />
<br />
===Bubbles's Pussy and Sex in the Comics===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris? I have a question.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, my favorite character is Bubbles, I kinda liked the, uh, the thing she had going with Blake, where she was kind of keeping the relationship secret. I thought that was kinda clever. I was wondering, uh, she's a water-type, so does that mean that her vagina is always wet, or does she have to be aroused like a normal woman?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, aroused. That's applied for all the, uh, Rosechus there. And also, like, you know, she's not just a water-type, she's also- she's a water- and electric-type, like uh- oh, shoot- What's the name of that one? Originated from Gold-Silver-Crystal series, uh, evolves from Chinchou? Lanturn. And she has, uh, she has Volt Absorb ability.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, Chris, another question following Bubbles. Uh, her body is 90% water, and now this thing about the whole sexual intercourse- about it. Now, don't take this rude, and you don't need to answer me... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...I totally respect your creative work. My wife actually got me into this, uh, show actually. So, what happens is- like, as you know, like, semens are like little fishes in themselves. Would that mean, I mean, would they actually have a route to fly into the egg, in theory, or do they just swim around her whole body, just forever just swimming around.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. The, uh, the internal or- the internal organs uh, for the Rosechus are pretty much the same thing, so I'd say pre- about, uh, as good chance as most any other mammal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, so you mean she's able to control her density a little bit more. She- I understand now. She's able to control more her density from the 90% water. Okay. That pretty much answers it just perfectly. That's been bothering me at work. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I got another question, Chris, about this whole sexual thing. I mean, this is a children's comic, right? Why is there so much sex in it?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. It's called romance, and my- and my- if you'll notice throughout the comics my best pieces of artwork among which were those where dey were kissing and making out. Romantic moments.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a hidden page-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' And because- and because- and because of the tension from, uh, the trolls and Encyclopedia Dramatica, I just felt like doing that in protest against them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, but childre-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' Yes but how is that really a protest? That, you know, you know, are, are you like referencing to the 60's when women burned their bras? That was in protes- That was feminism. Saying that they weren't slaves to men. Do you even understand the whole thing?<br />
<br>''[Multiple voices are heard at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Now, to tell you the truth, I never really thought about, I never really thought about that when I-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Chris]'' Then how is, stripping was, how was that protest-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Jack]'' It shows that they have vaginas and NOT dicks. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well you know the dick thing was the fact that they were just, you know, mocking you. I think you went overboard with that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well maybe I did. Maybe I did. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, you did, because that seems kind of excessive, kind of-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' I don't think they would have even bothered to write about an article about you if you didn't just keep reacting like that.<br />
<br />
===Chris justifies sex in a kids' comic===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I have another question.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The point some of us are trying to make is, if it's TV-Y7 that means there should really be no sex in it at all.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible over other people]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's pretty much incorrect, I mean, uh, there's so many romantic anime that's TV-Y7, and they shoul- they have making out.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, a lot of things in Japan, Japan has stricter standards-not stricter, I mean looser guidelines than America. It's much different.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear ya.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I was just wondering what Bubbles, um, she has a, that water whirlwind attack, I was just curious if you had any plans to make- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Butting in]'' By the way, that was a Whirl- Whirlpool.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font>Yeah, Whirlpool, sorry, sorry, Whirlpool, but do you have any plans to mix an, uh, Electric-type attack with that, since water conducts electricity, right? It could be a very powerful-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah, she did, she did an electric attack amongst the- the walls of that Whirlpool and she let out. In case you didn't know, there's a- little bits of lightning bolts among which-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, oh, I'm sor- I didn't notice that, I'm sorry, I'll go take another look. Thank you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hey Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> You make some pretty sweet Little Big Planet levels.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you.<br />
<br />
===Chris on Benadryl babysitting===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, there's a message from Cogs on the side, it's about, uh, do women not have the right to vote already in CWCville.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, evry- Everybody, no matter what age, no matter what gender or race, everybody has the right to vote in CWCville. Even if they're black.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Then what's up with the "Votes for Women" thing, I was-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Not just vote women, but- ''[interrupted]'' any other ethnicities, and gays?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't understand-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did that- heard it in Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What? Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, man, Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, yeah, that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's a classic. It's my favorite movie of all time.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that movie was, like, based in the 1900s.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but still I- still I agreed with that message there-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Taken out of context, that makes it seem like CWCville's set in the 1960s.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What message? That children should be given cough medicine so they'll go to sleep?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''What?''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that's what women used to do back in- That's what mothers, friggin' nurses and stuff used to do to kids in the 1900s, is give children, like, you know, cough medicine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Cause- cause the medicine- uh, correction, the medicine did not put them to sleep, there was a lullaby, not the cough medicine. They only had to take the cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ...because it rained, before dere, and it was not, and it was to, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Rain means cough medicine doesn't have anything to do with each other. That's not how friggin' germs are spread, or colds are gotten. Colds are gotten through germs, not the rain.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How is cough medicine any different from today's parents that just let their kids watch TV until they fall asleep? I mean, it's just as bad.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well- Cough medicine has a lot to do with the psychological effects of it. Obviously if you get- if you keep giving fre-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Thanks, Samantha, that was delicious.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's my, uh, Samantha-<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, that's we're all saying, cause I've heard that there's a lot of different chemicals in cough medicine. You could pick up a ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I don't even take cough medicine, because I'm not a pussy.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Anyway, I never put any references, I never did any references or plan any references to cough medicine or anything of that sort.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Well, Chris, Cassie says the last e-mail she got from you was on the 17th. How 'bout your being gay? Is that true?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[sigh]'' That wa- That was somebody had- That was Clyde hacking through my e-mail and spammed that to my contacts.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, I definitely did not do that-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You're a scoundrel-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -a slanderous lie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I did not do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Whoa-whoa-whoa. Wow. Well, thanks for that. She was worried that you were- that you don't like her.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> You're a scoundrel, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't do that. That was someone else.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I was wondering, because I've heard other news too, I was really hoping that you weren't gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Believe me, I'm straight.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I'll take your word for it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you. And, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Cogs- Cogs got a way- she showed us that, okay? I mean, you only ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br />
===Chris's fail-riffic Spanish===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So, Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, Screwhead's from Mexico. I heard you like Spanish, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hola, Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You know Spanish, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí. Conoso Mexico. Tomé dos años ''[unclear]'' mi escuela secundaria. (Yes, I know Mexico. I took two years [in, possibly] my secondary school.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has venido en Mexico? (Have you come to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, lo siento? (Uh, I'm sorry?)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has estado en Mexico? (Have you been to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Estoy Mexico? No. (I am Mexico? No.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[slowly]'' Has estado, um, in Mexico. Has venir? (Have you been to Mexico? Have gone?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Uh, no, I hav- no, no tengo pansars. ''[sic]'' (no, I don't have pansars (?))<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I think, uh, I think I meant to say- I'm pretty sure-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Did you just say you don't wear pants?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, no, I was trying to say, ah, I don't have plans to go in Mexico at the moment.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's what I understood what he was saying there.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, did you know that, that 4-cent garbage website is located in Mexico?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> That's why-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, that's why they can't get it shut down.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]'' borders, plus it's cheaper to run sites over there; they have, like, several servers.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wanted to talk to you, but she couldn't make it here, well, and, she wants to be your Spanish teacher, because she says that you've got room to improve your Spanish.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Oh, that Cassie. Yeah, I'm sorry, I thought you were- I got mixed up. Um... Yeah, um, I'm sorry, I, uh, I haven't talked to that- I haven't talked to Cassie in a while, but I've been mostly talking to, uh, her gal- her, uh, gal-pal and I'm sure- I'm sure she'd tell you a lot about her...<br />
<br />
===In which the trolls discuss bar fights===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey Chris, how- how does Sonichu keep Rosechu from spending more than a hundred dollars at the mall? I've always wondered how he could manage to do that. I've always had problems with that myself.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That wa- That time at the mall, it was, uh, Kel loaned the credit card. And it's like, yeah- she gave- she gave Sonichu the responsibility of that credit card. She did.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I've always given my advice on cannabis, you should do the ''[unintelligible]'', Cogs Chris, but I think she wants your response.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, one of my friends sent me this picture, and I think you might find it kinda disturbing just because they say it's proof that you're gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Aw yeah, I saw that, that's just a crappy Photoshop.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No, that one doesn't- this one doesn't look Photoshopped at all.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'm not gonna look at it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Oh, you're not? Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, uh, you say you're against smoking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. As a matter of fact, CWCville is a smoke-free, non-alcoholic city.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[partially drowned out]'' That's what we call a totalitarian state...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, and, uh, in the pilot episode with Seth MacFarlane, of, you know, Family Guy? He's always smoking. What do you think about that?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Go smoke.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I just- I just take that with a grain of salt, and, uh, you know, that's what-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, if he can smoke, why can't anyone else? I mean, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Because it causes cancer!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> So does a lot of things.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> It could be a prop pipe.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> In any case, I'm not- in any, in any case I've never done it and I never will.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, but eating too much fast food can give you a heart attack. I mean... so many things are deadly for you.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What about fast food, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> My father used to smoke and he went through a whole bunch of heart attacks. He suffered three- <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Well, I think that might have to do more with his weight.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He suffered through three or four triple bypasses.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I think that's... that's more like a weight issue.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He has a pacemaker!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, eh...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey ya guys, leave him alone. Ya know, my granddad, he smoked most of his life. He quit for 25 years and still died of lung cancer. I mean that's just the way it is. And your body never gets rid of it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, what about ''[pause]'' Chris, what about fast food? That's- that's bad for you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey Chris. Chris, could you do me a favor and send an email to Cassie? She's very worried about you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Yeah sure, I'll send her an email later.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, thanks.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, I've got uh, a certain someone you know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No no.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -she has to, uh, she wants to ask you w- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Also, she said something about some hair.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh yeah. Yeah, that's uh... that's another issue right there. Um, hmmm. I'll talk to her about that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, does, uh, drinking cause cancer?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, but it causes liver dysfunction and likely bar fights and automobile accidents.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, bar fights, but— <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Bar fights!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> -but I don't think that bar fights are that big of a problem.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I think bar fights are awesome.<br />
<br>''[People agree bar fights are awesome]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> But bar fights are bad. I got into a bar fight once and one of my hands got cut and two fingers from my left hand. Bar fights suck.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well, I think that might be more because you're Mexican. Are you sure you didn't lose them picking bo- picking grapes and- or something?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> No, Mexican people are more more- more much macho man; we get into bigger fights. We're more awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No- I think it might be because you got your hands stuck in some machinery when you were out picking in the vineyards.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't know about you guys, but I like- I like having bar fights.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Crashes Due To Math===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't have to be drunk to be in a bar fight or in an automobile accident, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but they increase the likeliness of it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You've been in an autobile— automobile accident, I mean, were you drunk?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I was distracted.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Uh, by what? I mean, it's kinda hard to be dist— you gotta be focused on driving man-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I was doing math in my head.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, math in your— <br />
<br>[Trolls talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> My mind got distracted by being its own calculator.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Are you good at math?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, is that for school?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Are you some kind of savant?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's impossible.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Guys, you're getting ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you like a mathematic genius or something?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> You know some artist people have like superpowers in their head. They can do like geniuses and add really well. ''[interrupted briefly by Jack saying something else about savant]'' Chris you are already an artist. Do you have any like, magical powers?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, I heard autistic people are really good at math. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Well not all the stereo- some of that sounds like stereotypes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[talking over Chris]'' ...it has to do with mental ability; I mean, what's the...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean I don't know- I mean I'm not saying that I'm a total genius. I mean I know- I know enough to get by.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What's the highest level of math you've taken Chris?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> College level.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I mean like algebra, or calculus or...?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. I believe I just did trigonometry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Very impressive.<br />
<br>[long pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So I was wondering. When did you get the CAD degree? I figured it's like a fine arts degree or something? I mean wha-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I designed a whole- I designed buildings and machinery and such along there. I designed the whole CWCVille shopping center.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don't you have a job then?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Your fans would love to see that Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' -I mean use that to design like, actual buildings? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I think I just told you I designed the CWCVille sho-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I don't mean in your comic. I'm just saying-<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde Isn't Popular And Chris Should Program===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well it's a good st-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> So I heard you got some nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'll be putting an update on da YouTube soon, but not right now. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking maybe you could like, you know, get a degree in game design and make the Sonichu game? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah man, it's not that hard to learn programming. C++ man.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">''Falsion:'''</font> Clyde, he hates you, why are you talking?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm just giving him some advice, I mean C++ is-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you here? We don't like you. You totally ruined Chris's life.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't ruin his life. He ruined his own life.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yes you did. You've ruined his life. You raped his girlfriend. <br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks at once over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If he was the man he said he was, he'd have gone to Nintendo, made all that money. How- how are you going to make money now Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Time will tell.<br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks again]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, time will tell Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font>''[unclear]'' -need a plan, you know? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking uh, if- uh- would you be interested in getting a degree in game design. Making the game or something? Like if you had to? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Maybe but uh- I still have things to sort out in my real life.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah it's kinda unfortunate what happened with the Nintendo thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah- hang on a second, I'll be right back. Mm- ''[clattering]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So be honest guys am I really that much of a bother. I mean...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah you kind of are.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like a total dickfart.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You realize weed causes cancer? <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I didn't know that. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> And it causes the munchies. You're gonna get fat, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's okay, man, because I work out.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Do you play Guitar Hero standing up?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I play Guitar Hero while on the treadmill. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Will the Sonichu game be a- ''[muffled]'' -or a Wii one?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> It be a Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Wii would like to play. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh. I only got a DS. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I heard you are very good at HTML. Why don't you make a HTML Sonichu game? That would be awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't think you can make a game in HTML.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A- anyway I came back...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris? How many courses did you have to take to get that degree in CAD? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -pretty sure you can make a game in HTML-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[speaking over]'' I'm took abo- took about two- took about two years to four years. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, if you can write HTML you can write C++, make your own games. Pretty simple man. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well it's something I'll consider. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde why are you talking to him? He hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm trying to give him some suggestions. I'm not insulting him, OK? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> HTML seems kinda outdated, so to speak. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font>I learn- I took two HTML classes so at least I know how to do- at least I know the ins and outs when it comes to like, workin' on it in the raw data- in the notepad.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> So you don't use Dreamweaver?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I also use Net- also use Netscape composer. <br />
<br>''[Someone starts singing 'Dreamweaver']''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I heard they went bankrupt or something.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't- I don- I don't listen to news because I don't care about bad news. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But that's not bad news that's just safety...<br />
<br>''[Talking over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why you gotta bring this bad vibe in here? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> OK OK I'll chill, I'm sorry it's just my wife- ''[can't hear over Chris typing extremely loud]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris you don't hear about these ones in a while. Like yesterday some guy in my town got run over by a train and he- he died. And that's a really bad thing, you know but you have to hear about it. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yeah but that's because you're Mexican. You Mexicans always play around the train tracks, what's with you? <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No come on, don't be racist.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> It's because Mexicans are stupid. I'm surprised I can use a computer. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' CrassCrab why do you have to be so mean?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> 'Cause my mother was raped by a Mexican. And I'm part Me- ''[muffled]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry man.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> That isn't fair to take it out on every other Mexican out there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His rule applied to millions. Just ignore him.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No I'm not my mother was raped by Mexicans.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> CrassCrab I'm tired of listening to you, get out of here. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Not all Mexicans are like that we- we- I am as Mexican guy. Not all Mexican guys are- ''[drowned out by typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't get me started on them. But that will be another day. Cause I'm sick of hearing bad news.<br />
<br />
===Chris Types Fast (And Hates Hex-Box)===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris what are you uh- typing there?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm typing a email. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> How many words can you type? How fast can you type? Sounding fast there. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhh say about uh- sorta between thirty and a hundred. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's quite a good range man. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like "The Flash", minus the red jump-suit.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh Chris um- I was wondering- ''[unclear]'' -would it be uh a Wii game or a DS game or both. I only own DS and I don't have any money for a Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[overlapping]'' Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wii, DS and Pla- hopefully uh- possibly uh, PlayStation 2 or 3. Never on [[Hex_Box|Hex-Box]]. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> When you gonna do this shit?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Why don't you like the Hex-Box? I mean I have an Xbox, I would love to play online with you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'd like to say this. Before Chris says anything about that I just wanna say that today my wife came home from the mall shopping for her usual clothes, that Gucci purse I had to buy for her. You know what she came home with? I wanted a PS3 but you know what she gave me was a frickin' Xbox 360. The Elite one? ''[someone speaks over]'' I know, I kept telling her like "Honey this isn't what I wanted. I wanted the PlayStation 3 so I can play LittleBigPlanet, Metal Gear Solid and Sonic Unleashed" <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You can put Sonic Unleashed on the Hex Box as well as Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Too whiny to make out]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Nintendo just- rejected your offer? Cause I- I heard a rumor that there was going to be a Sonichu game or something. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris uh. Cassie wants you to send her your Wii number so she can talk to you on the Wii. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright uhhhhh. I'll get- have to get my Wii number now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Send it to her in an email please.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they completely hate Sony. And they hate Microsoft as well. I mean this guy, Reggie? He always talks about kicking their ass and stuff. He's kinda crazy. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I know. Reggie's very mean he never brought out ''[unclear]'' to America. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah I wanted to play that game.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talked over]'' -I'm tellin' you guys. Reggie's just a great ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Like what?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can- I can't say anything OK but... you'll see. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah so I don't think like if you got the deal with Nintendo I don't think they'd put it on like mu- like anything else but the Wii or DS. Yeah, cause that Reggie guy he frickin' hates Sony. And Microsoft. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font>Wasn't he also the head of VH1?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or Pizza Hut.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. What are your favorite places to eat at? <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember um he ''[unclear]'' -but before that he was with Sega when Dreamcast was out. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yup. Let me type this email please. I mean y'all keep talking I'll just listen. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's no reason to hate the Xbox. Let's be honest.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or um- Chris um- do you wanna release your game on Nintendo and on Sony. If you do talk to somebody like EA or something, you can like do um- multi-console thing like a (?) party thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[busy typing]'' Hmm. Well it's all to think about. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I mean Sega does third party now so um- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah well I'm gonna keep typing this email here. Y'all keep talking. <br />
<br>''[Sound of Chris typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's true, it's true. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Chris I wanted to tell you that Cassie's going to be here any- any second so you can talk to her. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Hm. ''[continues typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Don't you care about her? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[annoyed]'' I'm typin' da email to her right now! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah um 360 is pretty bad um- it red-rings all the time. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> I've had mine over two years. The same one. And it has not red-ringed yet. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Dude you have to pay $50 just so you can play online. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[echoing]'' Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah it's bullshit.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah it's totally free on PlayStation. And Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris. Chris. No, no, no, no, I gotta talk about this. [long pause] Chris...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupting]'' I get less connection problems myself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can't let you get away with this Chris. You spent over $1000 on the PlayStation Network. OK? And you say you can't afford $50 for the Xbox? Terrible reason. That's a terrible reason. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, um, Cogs I had a friend of mine whose red-ringed a lot of times. She did not like it at all. She got herself a PS3 instead. <br />
<br>''[Chris is STILL typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I heard that like- the PS triple eats up a lot of energy and like- has like- burned houses down. Cause it messes up the- no but the PS3 really- <br />
<br>''[More of Chris typing then audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So when's the next comic coming out Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I can't say. I don't have a date for it right now. I've been busy with the- with real life and such. You know getting the s- getting the website back up and all that. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh but I've been waiting so long. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I gotta tell you something Chris. ''[unclear]'' -to the trolls but I haven't done anythin' myself. It's run off into splinter groups doin' stuff to you. Ever since the Panda thing, I haven't done anything to you man. Everybody's been running round doing things. I have no control anymore. So I'm back here. This is why I'm back here. Do you understand? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. I hear you.<br />
<br />
===Nudes On YouTube===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I hear you got some uh- nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> What? <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hear you got some nudes on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> NUDES!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> That's what I thought- I have nothing na- I have nothing like that on the nu- on the YouTube. I've nothing like that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh someone posted the pics form the ED page. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> They're just tryin' ta get on- they're just tryin' ta get on my nerves again. But I'm not gonna let 'em.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Did you take those pictures or what? Where'd they come from?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Uh, are they Photoshopped?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah most of- Yes. Most of them are Photoshopped.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I can help you with ED. Chris I can help you with ED.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You can see the neck and the body doesn't quite match up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, Chris. Cassie's just arrived. She's a little nervous about talking to you, but she's gonna talk to you soon. Is that OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I just got one quick comment. The ED people were in contact with me, but I've lost contact with them. But I know you can delete that page permanently. I'm tryin' to help you man. You can get that page down forever. Even the entire site. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What, after you raped uhm- Sarah? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I'm trying to make amends. So let me do my business. All right?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's too late to make amends. Look what you did. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um. Cogsdev said she had a look at the data, they have it up in Image editing software.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah. Well...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I don't know what to tell you there. <br />
<br>''[Several trolls speak at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Doesn't that mean they're real? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I don't think so. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You don't think so?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Well, did you take them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Then where did those pictures come from? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who took those?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I don't know. And I'd rather not talk about that anymore. It's making me feel uncomfortable.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Are you lying to your fans Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> We don't feel confort- we don't feel comfortable. We're big fans of your work and we don't like being lied to. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I'd like to make a point. It might just be a doppelganger [sic].<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, you know the thing I hate most is lies. I like to spread the truth about you Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You say you're honest, but you're lying to us.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[clearly annoyed]'' Fine, fine. Some those pictures are real. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Some of them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Some of them but not all of them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Like, which ones aren't real?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'd rather not go into detail because I'd rather not look at 'em. Cause uh- ''[interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' -are you ashamed of it?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Do you not like to look in the mirror?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You owe it- you owe it to your fans.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, but- yeah, but- yeah, but upon looking at those it's like ref- it's like reflecting a pe- uh p- a past moment in my life where I- I was played for the fool. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah, by the man in the pickle suit?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh that guy- I hate that guy.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah I saw- he was trolling some other people you know? So you're not alone, Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he took pictures of me like that too...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That guy's an asshole, I hate him.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhhh yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He took pictures of my wife too. Sick bastard. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[I think she says he is a peanut]''<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br>[another pause]<br />
<br />
===Chris Hates Harry===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I just uh- never was fond of it. Ever since it came out, I was never fond of it. ''[unclear as troll speaks over]'' -just like I hate Harry Potter because he's s- he's goin- he's uh- in compe- was in competition against the world of Pokemon. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Well that- that doesn't make sense. But they're two different medias. Pokemon-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah but- yeah but still he-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> -Harry Potter is a book.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah but he poses as competition against them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> That's not really competition. I mean- <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talks over Jack]'' Oh that reminds me about books- Vivi- Vivian wrote a book and sent it to you. You never read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes. I am afraid I- yeah, yeah- I'm uh- I've been uh- so I've been under uh- too much stress between internet and all that. I'll ge- I'll read it, I'll read it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's been waiting for your response for quite a long time.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I like the cover. (pause) Nice cover.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he is right about that. That is a nice cover. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah the book is pretty good- I read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Well I- I will definitely make it a point to uh- read it. Very soon. <br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Audible over the others]'' Did you ever read Twilight?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I've heard th- I've heard Twilight and I've seen the trailer but I haven't seen the movie, I'll wait for it to come out DVD or Blu-ray.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br />
===Random Access Humor Python Style===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh OK, I heard a lot of girls like Twilight. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I see. Hey Polly does your voice sound like that, 'cause it sounds like [[BlueSpike|a guy talking falsetto]]. I mean no personal offense. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> That's not very nice...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm sorry. Believe me I didn't mean any pe- anything personal it's just like, you know- hm- kind- just kinda takes me by surprise a bit, that's all.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I knew a girl like that in high school.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Sounding upset]'' I can't help it if I'm born like this.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I'm- I'm- I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah she's a girl. I saw her pics. She's a girl.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I'll s- I'll take his word for it. I'm sorry I cu- I accused you there.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um. OK. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You know, aut- I mean- let's- it's just uh- you know it's uh- you know it's uh a bit- just a spot of fun. [[Random-access_humor|Stupid humor]]. Monty Python's Flying Circus. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> We know you love that. There's just so many references to it in the comic. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah I d- after they put all of the entire series on PlayStation Network I downloaded the Hamlet episode- that was the one that had uh- Jimmy Hill parodying himself. It also had this funny bit where it was like, you know- ''[in a stupid voice]'' "...and now it's time for The Robinsons, an everyday story about blah-de-blah-de-blah-de-blah. Dum-de-dum-de-dum-de-duhhh-dum-de-dum"- and so on...<br />
<br>''[A troll begins to speak but is interrupted by a very high-pitched Chris]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> "Morning Mrs. Robinson- Morning Mrs. Robinson. Comin' out shoppin'? Oh- you've been shoppin', what did you buy? What's this?-" 'What did you buy this for?'[Trolls laugh over him]'' -It was a bargain!"<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I've heard you do that before. I don't know where. Anyway uh- uhm- Whatever happened to Jimmy Hill? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I haven't heard from him in a long time so just assuming uh- he gave up or uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I think he got a- I think he got a, uh- children's TV program in England.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well he ain't botherin' me, so I'm not worried about him anymore.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Ye- but he's stealing Sonichu. Bastardizing it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah he did but uh- he s- but haven't seen any updates on his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' -profile, he's still doing it.<br />
<br>''[Several trolls talk over each other about him having a TV show]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Fails At Spanish Pt. 2===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' <br />
<br>''[Troll says something more about the TV show, but it's muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wants to say hi. Just forgive her English because she can't speak very well, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> All right. Just sent her the email by the way, just now. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Hey, Chris. It's me, Cassie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi, Cassie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Fine, and you?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm feelin' OK. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Why haven't you emailed me? I was really about-was really worried about you. What's happened? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry. I be- I've bee- I've been busy with the Internet and the stress and all that. I sent ya an email just now go- it's got my Wii number in it so you can add me to your contacts. I've been talking to uh- I've been talking to Sarah lot- quite a bit lately. She's been helping me with uh- updating the Sonichu site, since I've uh- since I'm working on uh- it's re-uploading and such. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Kay, I believe you. I going to check ''[pronounced like 'sheg']'' it, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You're going to where?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[very quietly]'' Check it.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> To check it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> To "shag-it"? Is that the-<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Check the email. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[still doesn't understand]'' Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> I going to check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, check email. ''[Laughs]'' Yeah I'm sorry I tr- I tried to uh- understand but it just kind of messed up a little bit. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don- why don't you two speak in Spanish?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhh. I'm not exactly fluent. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ¿Sabes hablar español, Chris? (Do you know how to speak Spanish?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí, hablo español. (Yes, I speak Spanish)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Oh. ''[pause, one of the trolls says something to her]'' Oh, eso es muy sexy. (That is very sexy.)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Ohhhh. Te gusta. Te gusta muchísimo, (You like it. You like it a lot)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> La verdad, si. (To tell you the truth, yes)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Me amos mis amigas muchísimas. Sons muy bueñas! (I love my friends (feminine) a lot. They are very good.) [Correction: Amo a mis amigas muchísimo. Son muy buenas.] <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Oh, eso es tan cool en español! Muy bueno! (That's so cool in Spanish! Very good)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Muy bueño (very good)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Aha, exacto. (it is!)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]'' Okay, that's good. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Well, I going down, okay?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Okay, you're going down- by the way, let me ask ya Cassie, do you ever- you've uh- you've actually met uh Sarah May in person, haven't you? <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Not. She's on Internet.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Okay. That's cool- but anyway uh- you got- you d- you have my Wii number, uh- you can reply the email with your Wii number and it'll be registered on the Wii network. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[very haltingly]'' Yes. So. Cool. Talk with you Chris. You are so cool. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Heh. Uhhhh. You flatter me. Tú me flatteray. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[Weak laugh]'' Well, see you. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[In his 'baby voice']'' Adiós. ''[sigh]'' <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós, bebé.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós, chiquita bonita. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>[Pause as audio cuts out]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -it again. <br />
<br>[Another pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So anyway, Chris. I've been working on Rabbichoso for a day and uh- I was just wonderin' like, it's- it's supposed to compete with the Sonichu, you know? If you weren't aware of that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhhh. I grabbed onto d- grabbed onto g I- grabbed onto the... that gist. I'm aware- I'm aware of the gist of the theory. Uh. I'm aw- I'm aware that you're- that you're tryin' to compete. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know what competition does. It's drives uh- it drives consumer interest- Well that's why you know- It's great. You have to compete with high quality things. ''[muffled]''- that's why I'm trying to help. You know, compete. Just so you're aware of this, OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I see. -see. <br />
<br>[Pause]<br />
<br />
===Rabbichoso And Animu===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris we've been ge- been getting uh threatening images from the Pickle Man. Did you s- did you see the left? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I've not heard from the Pickle Man in lo- in a long time. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Apparently there are multiple ones because this one is, uh, not a darkie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh-huh. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> It's good that they're leaving you alone now. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Seems like they found more easier targets. Seeing as how you became [[Navy|saltier]].<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh. You know I originally got that line- quote from an e- ep- episode of ExCel Saga. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> From what?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> ExCel Saga.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Oh, ExCel Saga. Oh, yeah, that's a good anime.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> AIII I-Falazzo! (''He means [[ScotPalazzo|Il-Palazzo]]'')<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, have you ever seen two animes, ''[muffled]'' and Schooldays?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I have not seen either of those. I like Steel Angel Kurumi as well.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, how much Japanese do you know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only a little bit. I'm not totally fluent. I can say that with all honesty. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something unintelligible, not quite Japanese]''<!-- It sounds like he's saying "You say you can't- can you speak with me?" in CHINESE. --><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Huh?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Never mind, you won't understand it.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[unclear] Chris-Chan. Genki desu-ka?''<br />
<br />
===Chris Could Kill Clyde===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, I just wanted to say, uh, you're doing a good job, like, keeping calm even though Clyde is here. I mean u- I thought you'd be, like, more angry at him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm being calm with you guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> -I would have been choking him by now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I'd have kicked his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Preach to the choir. Pr- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I'd make him choke on a pickle if it were up to me.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You guys can't touch me otherwise I'd kick all your asses. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, bring it.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris could kick Clyde's ass anytime.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Let's see Chris do it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Bring it to me any day of the week and I'll definitely show him a hard- day's night. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah I think you could kick his ass.<br />
<br>[Trolls and Clyde talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Sings]'' -been a hard day's night...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -never mind, just...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean that as a- meant that as in I would beat... him up. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Kick his ass?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm very strong. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. I'm gonna see you later, OK?<br />
<br>''[Unison of goodbyes]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> OK see ya. Thank you so much Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[ignoring his fans]'' Yeah I can- I can lift about my weight. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Like um- if Clyde were right in front of you, what would you do to him?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Like, what kind of style of fighting do you have?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, shut up.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I gotta know my competition. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Personal- in the physical offense. ''[sigh]'' I would definitely be giving you so much physical pain. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's not a s- that's not a style. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I would beat you up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He deserves it man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, that's still not a style...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He uses fisticuffs. He's a gentleman. Gentleman fisticuffs. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Whatever, I'll just see-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Stop arguing and just-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ''[Over previous troll]'' I mean, if he did that to my sweetheart I'd fucking kill him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well. He's not- he's not going to come over and kill me, I know that. He doesn't have the money. [pause] You know I'm surprised that you're mad here. You're much kinder in person I thought you- Now I'm just expecting you at my door anytime, just waiting for you to stand here with an axe or something. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Knives are too messy. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Ah, now a sword- sword's are usually better.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What about poison?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Poison's good, poison's good.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde, what- do you want him to beat your ass?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I was just expecting it, you know.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, you know what's another thing? I would definitely not tell you how I would be hurting you, but I would definitely give you a who- big amount of pain. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, he's gonna keep you guessin'!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he deserves it. After everything he's done-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Muffled by troll]'' -going to kill me, I'd like to know. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I'm just going to let you cover in- worry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh so you're never going to show up, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Oh yes I will show up. But you just won't be expecting it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't even know where I live, do you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Find out!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Maybe I should give you my address. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, you should track him down and kick his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> But I'm going to leave you guessing too...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Defend Panda's h- Panda's honor.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, hi Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> 'sup Julie.<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br>''[Everyone talks over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde's A Dick===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I notice her mic doesn't work. But still I'm just letting her know that- acknowledge her presence. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're doing well staying calm even though Clyde's here.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, Clyde's a total dick.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Fucker.<br />
<br>''[Rustling]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I mean, he's taken over everything. The IRC. This. I can't- no one can stop him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' -over there, so...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll:'''</font> I- I like Rabbichoso.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Of course you do. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll''':</font> It's funny. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I will not offer any new comment on it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, OK. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, when can we expect the next Sonichu to be released.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, we've been eager.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It'll be soon. It will be soon.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah just ignore Clyde man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean if you're going to put a hard date on it, you'd better deliver your promise. If you don't, I'll strike harder. That's all I'm saying.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. You're saying if I don't set a date, you're gonna...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no. I'm saying don't make promises you can't keep. Don't make promises you can't keep.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He'll choke you with his medallion bitch!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who the hell do you think you are?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I agree with Cogs over there. Maybe you should do just a page a day, not release all at once. Keep his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you telling him this when he hates you?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm giving him suggestions man, OK? OK?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Only thing he's gonna suggest to you is 'shut the fuck up'!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, seriously man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It's alright. <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Penny Arcade's slow.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh you mean like Penny Arcade or ''[unclear]'' or MegaTokyo?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they're just like- boring. Then they because sellouts. <br />
<br />
===Chris's Country Cookin===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Chris, where's your favorite place to eat?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. Can't really say uh- but I like country cookin'. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> What's country cooking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh no G's in the sto- no G's in the name by the way, no G. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah what's country cooking? I'm not familiar with that.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's like uh- som- something like Golden Corral. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But Golden Corral is a national franchise.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh Chris, how are your parents?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> They're OK.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br>[Long pause]<br />
<br />
===Sex Is Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I've got a sug- another suggestion. Now be quiet all of you cause I know you hate me. Just- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, Chris hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well don't defend him. He can defend himself OK? He's a man. But whatever-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let him speak.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm suggesting that- you go on and on about this sex stuff but you've never gotten laid, have you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I like to put myself in the imaginative situation that I'd like to be in and the sexual stimulation. So I can be ready for [[ego|myself]] for when I do actually have my first time.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well my first time was- I'll just say that it's terrible, OK? I didn't know what I was doing, she didn't know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let me guess, you prematurely ejaculated?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no, it's not like that you don't know what to do. Every woman's told me OK? You can't prepare-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Clyde]'' First time's always awkward...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -I learnt that mistake a while back, OK whatever. OK, you just- you can't prepare for your first time. You might as well just have a really bad first time so you learn from your mistakes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm not trying to defend Clyde or anything, but yeah it's kinda true. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Hmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The girl I first fell in love with is the girl I'm married to right now. Samantha just changed my world. But marriage does get boring.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Tips To STAY STRAIGHT===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I know how you say how important it is to stay straight, um- I'm having trouble staying straight, do you have any suggestions?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Watch a bunch of pornography with uh- with naked women. OK, a lot of naked women.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That happened to me one time...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, I have this friend I play video games with, is that gay? He's male by the way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry could you- I'm sorry could you repeat that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I have this guy I'm friends with he always comes over to my house to play video games. Is that gay? I'm kinda scared. You know? I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Hmm. Is he making any advances towards you? Personally. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I dunno how to tell. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Like uh sit- does he always sit next to you when he's playing games. Playing video games.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Yeah he usually does. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I see. Hmm. My- well- my suggestion in that case, would be to keep a heavy distance between you and that guy. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he meant anything gay by it though. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he means anything like- gay about it. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well, still- it's always best to find out- you can ask him. Don't be afraid to ask him. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> What would you do in this situation?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well if he said yes then I would uh- basically- let me think about that a moment. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you have any friends who're are like, guys?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only acquaintances and only a few of them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you play video games with people or anything? Do they come over to your house?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. No.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I remember-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> ''[Cuts Polly off]'' I'm just worried I might be gay or something. I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You probably are Falsion, but that's OK. No, look dude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Leave him alone! Leave him alone! He's straight!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Why?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Hey, let's have a calm conversation here. Let's not have any fights.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br>''[Trolls speak over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I've been reading the Sonichu comics and man, they are page-turners! Seri- I was on- I was on the edge of my seat for a while. I ju- I couldn't- I couldn't- you know. Just had to read and read.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Thank you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, can I be your friend? I know I'm a guy. I don't mean anything gay by it. Can I be your friend? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. I dunno. <br />
<br />
===A Wild Snorlax Appears===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Do you want any hotdogs?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I'm OK. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> No?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I was talking with my mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I was wondering if I could be your friend.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I h- heard you only like, you only like to be acquaintances. With guys. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, ummm. Let's just pretty much leave it at acquaintance. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hello Mrs. Chandler. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> She can't hear you, I'm wearing my earphones.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Listen, I'm not gay. I don't- you know- yeah. Never mind.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I mean- I mea- I-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What do you have against gay people? I'm serious to hear this. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's just unnatural and it's against God's will. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, it's not like it's a choice. You can't change who you are like- you're a creative guy but I mean they're just gay. They can't change that. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm just answering a few questions mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You don't have to answer. Nobody's payin' you to do that.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yes they are.<br />
<br>''[shuffling sounds, clanging]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> It ain't none of their business no-way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I wouldn't be asked questions like that by employers or anybody. Don't tell people what you d- what you think. Keep that to yourself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris what's hap- what's happening?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, obviously, my mother is offering her input.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Tell her you're just talking to some friends. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' I don't need no back talk from somebody on the other end of the phone.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear you, Mom. Hmm. Hmm. <br />
<br>''[scraping sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> These- these idiots don't have any brains or- they don't have any idea this way or that.<br />
<br>''[more banging, clanging and tumbling sounds. Sounds like washing up]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Is right now a bad time right now? I mean-<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Pixelblocks, Pixelblocks!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Someone's saying "Pixelblocks." <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you saying [[Pixelblocks]]?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>''[Chris's mom has been singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful singing voice, Chris.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[Audio cuts back in]'' -all the anxiety, causing you stress.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, well sometimes they don't; they can be peaceful.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Well, your mom and dad get the crappy end of the stick.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm, a lot of us do.<br />
<br>''[more clattering sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Yeah, just like this nasty mess over here that you guys left that I got to clean up.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm. ''[Audio cuts]'' -Yeah, I took care of my bills. I mean, not completely, but I took care of them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> What about going to, uh, Redmond?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> We! (Wii?) <br />
<br>[unintelligible, windows beeps]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[laughing]'' Yeah, sweetheart pool.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Mmhmm. ''[laughing]'' Like the other side of the pillow.<br />
<br>''[someone sighing. Clanging noises return after short absence]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' ...is all, I mean, living with your parents is okay bad-in today's bad economy, but at 26, come on. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Shut up, you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I'm being nice.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde isn't so bad a guy. He does bad things, but he's pretty cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah he's reformed. He's seen the error- Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How- how could he do that to Sarah? I mean- That's not right.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah. Well, that's like Luke... That's like Luke and Laura from General Hospital. I know that's like, before y'all's time, but, um... Luke was a rapist and she-he raped Laura and then, like, a few months later they get married. So... ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, I believe Clyde was trying to make amends from his past actions.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, but Chris, can you uh- can you forgive him?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Random Troll:'''</font> ''[whispering]'' White whale, holy grail! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Can you forgive a small-dicked Asian? Just a thought.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He's not Asian! <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm half-Asian, okay? My parents ''[unclear]'' I don't really wanna go into it. It's too bo-boring for you people. But this is why I ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you there? Just makin' sure, buddy.<br />
<br>''[clattering]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Move out.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Another Troll''':</font> Well, how do I do that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi there, my kitty. ''[In baby voice]'' Yes, there's a pretty kitty.<br />
<br>''[Someone speaking with a voice-synth]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hang on a second. I've got, like, a thousand different... Oh, Crass, why'd you do that?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Because. You can unban him but, yeah. I'm not gonna friggin' stand for that. <br />
<br>''[Sound of a vacuum cleaner]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> I (m j d?) do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I heard the "g" word.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um, is that a vacuum cleaner?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Yeah, sounds like it is.<br />
<br>[Trolls speak but are drowned out by vacuum]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ...room or something.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I think the vacuum cleaner... <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If that's the government trying to do some kind of thing, then my name's Rusty Shackleford.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's a loud fan.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I have a fan above my stove, too.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Hey... I do, too.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Wait- wha- wait. You-you-you're in the kitchen? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Me too.<br />
<br>''[possibly Sonic game sound effects]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmhm? Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I'm pretty sure it's already asked, but I didn't catch the answer. When can we expect the next Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I-I-I told you my suggestion of releasing a page a day or something. I mean, it's a pretty good one. It-it-it allows for a good time. Finish a page a day. You upload it. You know? It's very good. Works very well.<br />
<br>''[Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh. I mean- you guys keep asking when he's going to finish it but I wonder how many pages are going to be in the new one? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> The last one was like, thirty. Just release it over the span of a month. Works fine. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...go up to ninety thousand...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[mutters something]''<br />
<br>''[Sound of Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Down by the river...side.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful voice, Chris.<br />
<br>''[clattering, typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[unclear, repeating the same two phrases]'' Gone down by the river, down by the water side, down by the riverside. Down by the waterside. Down by the riverside.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember ''[unclear]''<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -I'm hungry myself.<br />
<br>''[some kind of alarm sounding]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Then go eat.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I already ate.<br />
<br />
===Anime And Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I wonder what anime Chris watches nowadays. There's not many on television but do you still watch Japanese cartoons? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[In a bad accent]'' Kawaii desu ne. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I want to watch Shuffle. He said it was very good. He said it was sad. I don't know if I wanna watch- I don't like sad stuff. I like to be happy when I watch anime.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, and um, do you watch stuff like Bleach and um Code Geass or Naruto or something?<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I'm glad to hear that Shuffle isn't sad. I'm definitely going to watch it sometime.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um, yeah Chris that was a good call on Naruto. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah there's a lot of people who don't like it much either. Too popular.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But please. Please. Hope. ''[audio cuts out briefly]'' Uh, Chris, please consider When They Cry.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Ooh, I saw that one. It was a really good series.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, I know; that was good, like- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah. Both seasons of it. <br />
<br>''[Windows beeps, voices overlapping]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I could link you to Season One if you want. Yeah, Samantha got me into that. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...you'll give it a try, Chris. It's a very, very good series.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Hm. Hey, Julie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...lots of ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Watch Shuffle. You got the six episodes of Shuffle or... Which o- which anime? I'm sorry. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh and JoJo's Bizarre Adventure is also cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I really liked JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. Very ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Za warudo!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah, I think Shuffle is quite all right. I like Heidi. She's sweet and loyal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> That's a good one. One of my favorites is Black Lagoon.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris have you ever seen La Blue Girl?<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other about different anime]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, uh, Chris can I, my, uh, I don't know if it's all right, but, like, could you like, give me an email sometime? I could, uh... recommend you to... this anime that... Polly and... Julie like to watch. They're quite- they... Oh, C-and Cogs has recommended such great anime. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[talking to his mother]'' Yeah? That's ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> As well as Julie-Julie's the person that got me into anime.<br />
<br />
===People Love Poketunes===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> -we can go into this later cause I got my headphones on. And, Mom, you know what something else? They liked your singing.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> What? I don't sing.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> That's my laugh; that's my laugh. They couldn't hear me. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They heard you. Singin'. Just now.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I can't sing!<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I'm tone deaf. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They just heard you singing, and liked your voice.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay. Did you write checks for all those bills and pack everything ''[unclear]''?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yes, Mother, I did.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You're not telling me no story?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm not telling you no story.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> OK. It's important [''inaudible''] did you pay them?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, I paid that one. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay, you have to be honest with me, 'cause, see, you're settin'...<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm being honest, I'm being honest.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> How you respond to what [we] talk about. You say you ought to something and you don't do it then that's gonna change my ideas ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay... I'll be sure to pay the remaining differences next month.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> No, this month.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I know but I couldn't pay them all with 90 dollars so there's still some left ''[sound cuts]'' ...oh, you're cooking them up here, okay, that's why you turned the fan on over the stove.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br>''[Trolls rejoice and mock Momma Chandler]''<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 1|Mumble Chat 1]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 3|Mumble Chat 3]]|}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Spanish]]<br />
==Links==<br />
*[https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBOVVDS0JtSDNvMWs Download]<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisvielhttps://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=Mumble_2&diff=162993Mumble 22012-09-26T20:26:38Z<p>Irisviel: </p>
<hr />
<div>{{Articleofthenow}}<br />
[[Image:0839-MomDesi.JPG|thumb|right|180px|In Mumble 2, a Wild [[Barbara Chandler|Snorlax]] appeared.]]<br />
<br />
'''Mumble 2''' is the second [[Mumble]] chat that took place on 4 [[February 2009]]. More than an hour long.<br />
<br />
This is a more organized Q&A type chat than [[Mumble 1]]. Questions from [[Clyde]] about [[sex]] in the [[comic]] and interesting tidbits about how Chris believes sex is the same as romance. This is pretty hard hitting, with stuff like how Chris is into [[McDonald's|fast food]] yet he's against tobacco. A lot of drama involving Clyde.<br />
<br />
Length: '''1:49:17'''<br />
<br />
==Summary==<br />
<br />
<br />
===Notes===<br />
* Chris doesn't like Clyde because he stole his sweetheart.<br />
* Audio cuts out for a minute before Chris says: "...HYMEN!" (You broke her hymen)<br />
* Trolls claim [[Panda]] is with Clyde, Chris wants to hear her voice, they say she's busy<br />
* 'She and I WERE very close'<br />
* Chris didn't have $400-$800 to go and see Panda; claims he got this number from an airport website recommended by [[Miyamoto]]<br />
* Insists on [[Sonichu (character)|Sonichu]] being in ''[[Animal Crossing]]''<br />
* Doesn't want to talk about his deal with them<br />
* Insists that he doesn't have to turn down his radio since his voice is louder (''it is horribly loud in the mic'')<br />
* Panda gave Clyde all of the sites, etc.<br />
* [[Sarah]] is going to be with Clyde, which Chris wants to deny<br />
* These motherfuckers keep talking over each other<br />
* Calls a troll's critique crap<br />
* [[Bubbles]] must be aroused, she isn't wet all the time<br />
* Bubbles is 90% water so does sperm just swim around forever? NO<br />
* Clyde: This is a children's comic, why so much sex?<br />
: '''Chris:''' It is romance. My best artwork is when they're making out 'romantic moments', drawn in protest to trolls. Shows that [[Rosechu]]s have vaginas, not [[duck]]s.<br />
* Admits to maybe going overboard<br />
* Trolls try to reason with him about the [[ED]] article: There wouldn't be an article if he didn't react like he does.<br />
* Trolls say that TV-Y7 means NO SEX but Chris points to romantic anime that have making out (cartoons are for kids, whatever the content).<br />
* Trolls talk about Japan being less strict about those things<br />
* Everyone gets to vote in [[CWCville]], even if they're [[Niggos|black]].<br />
* Got his idea from [[Mary Poppins]].<br />
* Troll tries to give historical background about cough medicine putting kids to sleep. Chris insists it was the lullaby that put them to sleep.<br />
* Discussion about Chris, 'gay message' sent by a troll<br />
* He calls Clyde a scoundrel<br />
* BELIEVE HIM HE IS STRAIGHT<br />
* Chris tries to speak Mexican at 20:50<br />
* Mexican speaks Mexican to him... he replies in Menglish<br />
* [[4-cent_garbage]] is located in Mexico<br />
* Someone says that he needs to improve his Mexican<br />
* Chris is against smoking, CWCville is smoke and alcohol free<br />
* Rehash of why [[tobacky]] is bad, his position on it, alcohol=bar fights<br />
* Chris's dad smoked and had several bypasses, has a pacemaker and has had heart attacks<br />
* Mention of his hair cuttings for his fans<br />
* Chris was doing math in his head, got in car crash.<br />
* Chris has taken college level math. Took trigonometry.<br />
* Trolls gang up on Clyde for stealing Panda<br />
* Time will tell when Chris will make the money he would have in the Nintendo deal<br />
* Trolls bash Clyde for his pot smoking <br />
* Chris doesn't watch news because it's bad news =(<br />
* Bashing of the Mexican<br />
* Chris can type 30 to 100 WPM, but can't type and talk at the same time<br />
* Chris says [[PSN]] is free though Clyde(?) points to the $1,000 Chris spent on PSN<br />
* Chris has been typing for 15 minutes now and it is VERY loud<br />
* Chris has been busy IRL therefore the comic release doesn't have a date<br />
* Someone points to nudes on [[YouTube]].<br />
* He does not have it on the YouTube, but he isn't going to take it anymore.<br />
* Claims some of the photos are photoshopped.<br />
* Clyde offers help to take ED page down.<br />
* Chris denies taking those pictures, doesn't want to talk about it, making him uncomfortable.<br />
* Some of the pictures are real. When questioned which ones are fake, Chris can't answer.<br />
* Chris hates Harry Potter because it was in competition with [[Pokémon]]!<br />
* Chris is too stressed to read Vivian's [[A Girl Who Brought Down the World|book]], but he likes the cover!<br />
* Polly, who has been talking the whole time is confronted by Chris who thinks she is a guy. Polly is upset. Chris apologizes.<br />
* [[Jimmy Hill]] has launched his Sonichu show<br />
* More Mexican talk at 55:10<br />
* Chris giggles and sighs happily when Cassie, another Mexican, compliments him and when she leaves he says 'Chiquita Bonita'<br />
* Rabbichoso talk (Sonichu.info)<br />
* Classic trolls are leaving Chris alone.<br />
* Chris likes Steel Angel Kurumi (''quote from [[Wikipedia:Steel Angel Kurumi|Wikipedia]]: often classified as ecchi due to the focus on fanservice and panty shots'')<br />
* Chris claims to be very strong, could beat Clyde up. Says he would show Clyde a [[Aqua Teen Hunger Force|Hard Day's Night]], and would give Clyde pain.<br />
* ShinyMarshtomp makes an appearance? Likes Rabbichoso<br />
* Chris likes to eat at [[Country Cookin]] (''like Golden Corral'')<br />
* Chris likes to imagine his first time. <br />
* Clyde says the first time is awful, Chris said it was because Clyde prematurely ejaculated<br />
* Watch porn with naked women to cure your gay<br />
* Guys sitting next to you = gay coming on to you<br />
* Falsion has been in the chat room and is afraid he is gay<br />
* A wild Snorlax appears<br />
<br />
==Transcript==<br />
<br />
===Waiting for Chris===<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I can't wait to hear Chris! I'm a huge fan!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, goddamn these noodles are fantastic. Man, I wish I could eat like this everyday.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Have you eaten the rice balls?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no. These are noodles. These are-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Fan-fucking-tastic.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now they're all gone, it's fantastic, you know?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Sweetangie is Chris. Or, we think so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's definitely not the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm disappointed there's so many impostors out there. Kinda my fault, but, you know, if it weren't- ''[unintelligible]'' -hard to come by.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His mic was working last time he was here, just fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He usually capitalizes his words, like in every sentence.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I don't think this is- I don't think this is him.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Is it set to push to talk or something?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You better get us your email address Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah its push to talk. It's called push to talk. It's fantastic ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, just have him set it to voice activity. It works so much better that way.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Aww, he left.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> You guys are fucking idiots.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other again]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You guys scared him off by being guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, you fucking jackasses. Nice going.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Was that even the real...?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yes, that was the real Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> He's too much of a pussy to talk.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, cause you scared him, or some- No, or he's too stupid to be.<br />
<br>''[Trolls Laugh]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Arrives===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Chris arrives, with radio playing loudly]'' Hello.<br />
<br>''[Trolls all greet him]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, now-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Why haven't you got your microphone working?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't know why my microphone [is] messed up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry, but we had an impostor here before.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm registered. I've got myself registered now. So, uh, hopefully-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> That's probably why. It had to like, uh- calibrate.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Well, I'm calibrated now.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So, Chris, have you seen Rabbichoso, it's fantastic.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't give a crap about your stupid pencil sketch.<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I am not listening. I do not have to listen to ''you''.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Why, I'm not understanding [inaudible]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well for one thing,and I'll say it on here, you stole my sweetheart!<br />
<br>''[Cutout continues]''<br />
<br />
===PandaHalo, Trip to Redmond and Animal Crossing===<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You broke her hymen!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I know it's a terrible mistake, but I plan to make it up to her. I'm getting married and uh- I'm doing the things I should do.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh and another thing, if she is really over there with you now, then put her on the mic. Please.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> She's not- He never said-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, Chris, she's very busy, OK. She's very busy.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's not over here right now. Okay? So lets drop it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright, fine. Well could you tell her to please send me a message lettin' me know, for sure, so I can know- so I can know to-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' I'll let her know whatever you want, but it's her life. She doesn't have to send you a message. You failed her. You failed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' She and I were very close.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If you we're so close, then why didn't you go?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' Because I had- Aw, hang on a second. How do I- oh, that's right. This thing. Right. Mmm. Hold on a sec. Oh yeah, because I did not have four to eight hundred dollars!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It doesn't cost that much to go cross-country man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes it does. I know, I saw it on an airport website. Where I was be- Where I was- recommended to me by Mr. Miyamoto.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, you can drive there. It's not that hard.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened with that? I thought, um, didn't you have a deal with them or something? I heard a rumor that your characters were going to be in Animal Crossing.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, they are in Animal Crossing. And I did- and I do- I did have a deal with them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What happened though?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' I'd rather not say.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Radio, Clyde and Criticism===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, why don't you turn down the TV? It's hard to hear you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Annoyed sigh]'' I do not have a TV turned on in here.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I can hear it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I have a radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I hear something in the background.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Burping throughout sentence]'' Well that's the- that would b- the radio. And it is not that loud.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But it shows up pretty well on your microphone mic. With due respect.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> But still, my voice is louder than the radio.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Ah goo- ahh given.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh, Chris? Uh, when are you going to do the new Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something over Polly]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]'' Uh, I'll answer Polly's question. I'm not sure. It's, uh, it's in progress right now, I'm drawing it up.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I can't wait to read it!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. Well, we'll see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Listen, Clyde kind of has admin on here, so we can't really do anything about him. So, yeah. I don't know.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Hard to hear over Chris's radio]'' ...with you guys. I love you guys. Just as much as Chris loves you guys. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I was angry. I was angry. But I'm calm now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't try to hurt any other person from now on.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm doing the best I can. I'm doing the best I can.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have much- I do not have much to say in response to that right now. Because I'm ticked off.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't let him get to you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're no better than he is, if you give in.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Huge sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris, I just wanted to let you know I'm a huge fan of the comics, and I'm glad you keep doing what you're doing. You're doing a great job, and just keep it up, alright man?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, yeah, I appreciate the, uh, what's the word I'm looking for? The, the, uh- well, the encouraging words. Encouragement. I appreciate the encouragement. Well, there are things, uh- I- er- current events I do not appreciate. I appreciate the positive encouragement.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I can't really do anything. He took over the IRC channel. I used to be the owner. I mean Clyde. He's like taking over everything.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, it was because Panda gave it to me, you know. But anyway, I mean, you can't just listen to encouragement, you've got to listen to criticism, man. Criticisms are what make you better, you learn from your mistakes. You learn from mistakes.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Be right back guys, my wife is calling.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I don't- I don't- Tons of people don't like the Rabbichoso art style, but you know, I gotta improve on that. That's something I plan to improve on. There's a lot of criticism in the death of Sonichu, right? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What? What did you just say?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a lot of criticism of Sonichu. Right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. For a moment there I thought you said something different.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What, what did you think I said? I'm just saying, there are people who like it and people who don't like it. You gotta start taking in those suggestions. You know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. So many things that will be improved upon. But, I just have to hear from Sarah herself that she really is going to be with you, Clyde. I have to hear it from herself. It's one thing to hear it from you and then it's- then on that note, it's just I find it very hard to believe. So I have to hear it from her.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, I kinda think that Rabbichoso sucks. I mean, I think it could be funny, but it honestly looks like it's drawn by a kindergartner.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, Sonichu has evolved over the years. You can see that the art's getting better. Rabbichoso doesn't even look like something a beginner would do, honestly. I mean, ''[Interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A whole bunch of crap!<br />
<br>''[Everyone starts talking at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, Sonichu is in color.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I know, I accept his criticism. But you just called it crap! Now that's just rude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, I have emotions going behind me- uh, behind that opinion.<br />
<br />
===Cassie===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, did you get my message.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Aren't you going to be the gentleman, then? Aren't you gonna be the gentleman?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I just want to ask you, Chris. I'm Cassie's friend. She- she's worried sick about you. Why haven't you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did email her! As a- I- I haven't gotten any re-plies from her. I have emailed her and I have instant messaged her on A.I.M. and Skype. I haven't heard back from her. I don't know what's going on there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> ...you emailed her.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> When was the last time you emailed her?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, hang on, I'll check.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris? I have a question. My fa- One of my favorite new characters is, um, Simonla, and like, I also like Zapina as well. Um, are they gonna have bigger parts in the series later on?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, could you repeat that question?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I was wondering if Simonla and Zapina will either have bigger parts in the series later on. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> [[Sonichu_10#The_Final_Countdown|Possibly]]. Possibly, but, uh, I can't say for sure. Oh, and, uh, to answer your question, uh- in answer to, uh, I believe, uh, Screwhead, who asked? It was about four days ago. About four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Yeah. Four days ago? Okay, I'll tell her to check it out.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> The last email I sent was about four days ago.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> She'll contact you in a while, though.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> I'll tell her to check it out and- and thanks Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright. Mm.<br />
<br />
===Bubbles's Pussy and Sex in the Comics===<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, Chris? I have a question.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, my favorite character is Bubbles, I kinda liked the, uh, the thing she had going with Blake, where she was kind of keeping the relationship secret. I thought that was kinda clever. I was wondering, uh, she's a water-type, so does that mean that her vagina is always wet, or does she have to be aroused like a normal woman?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, aroused. That's applied for all the, uh, Rosechus there. And also, like, you know, she's not just a water-type, she's also- she's a water- and electric-type, like uh- oh, shoot- What's the name of that one? Originated from Gold-Silver-Crystal series, uh, evolves from Chinchou? Lanturn. And she has, uh, she has Volt Absorb ability.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, Chris, another question following Bubbles. Uh, her body is 90% water, and now this thing about the whole sexual intercourse- about it. Now, don't take this rude, and you don't need to answer me... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...I totally respect your creative work. My wife actually got me into this, uh, show actually. So, what happens is- like, as you know, like, semens are like little fishes in themselves. Would that mean, I mean, would they actually have a route to fly into the egg, in theory, or do they just swim around her whole body, just forever just swimming around.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. The, uh, the internal or- the internal organs uh, for the Rosechus are pretty much the same thing, so I'd say pre- about, uh, as good chance as most any other mammal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, so you mean she's able to control her density a little bit more. She- I understand now. She's able to control more her density from the 90% water. Okay. That pretty much answers it just perfectly. That's been bothering me at work. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I got another question, Chris, about this whole sexual thing. I mean, this is a children's comic, right? Why is there so much sex in it?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. It's called romance, and my- and my- if you'll notice throughout the comics my best pieces of artwork among which were those where dey were kissing and making out. Romantic moments.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's a hidden page-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' And because- and because- and because of the tension from, uh, the trolls and Encyclopedia Dramatica, I just felt like doing that in protest against them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, but childre-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Clyde]'' Yes but how is that really a protest? That, you know, you know, are, are you like referencing to the 60's when women burned their bras? That was in protes- That was feminism. Saying that they weren't slaves to men. Do you even understand the whole thing?<br />
<br>''[Multiple voices are heard at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Now, to tell you the truth, I never really thought about, I never really thought about that when I-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Chris]'' Then how is, stripping was, how was that protest-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Interrupting Jack]'' It shows that they have vaginas and NOT dicks. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well you know the dick thing was the fact that they were just, you know, mocking you. I think you went overboard with that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well maybe I did. Maybe I did. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, you did, because that seems kind of excessive, kind of-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' I don't think they would have even bothered to write about an article about you if you didn't just keep reacting like that.<br />
<br />
===Chris justifies sex in a kids' comic===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I have another question.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The point some of us are trying to make is, if it's TV-Y7 that means there should really be no sex in it at all.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unintelligible over other people]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's pretty much incorrect, I mean, uh, there's so many romantic anime that's TV-Y7, and they shoul- they have making out.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know, a lot of things in Japan, Japan has stricter standards-not stricter, I mean looser guidelines than America. It's much different.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear ya.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I was just wondering what Bubbles, um, she has a, that water whirlwind attack, I was just curious if you had any plans to make- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Butting in]'' By the way, that was a Whirl- Whirlpool.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font>Yeah, Whirlpool, sorry, sorry, Whirlpool, but do you have any plans to mix an, uh, Electric-type attack with that, since water conducts electricity, right? It could be a very powerful-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah, she did, she did an electric attack amongst the- the walls of that Whirlpool and she let out. In case you didn't know, there's a- little bits of lightning bolts among which-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, oh, I'm sor- I didn't notice that, I'm sorry, I'll go take another look. Thank you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hey Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> You make some pretty sweet Little Big Planet levels.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you.<br />
<br />
===Chris on Benadryl babysitting===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh, there's a message from Cogs on the side, it's about, uh, do women not have the right to vote already in CWCville.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, evry- Everybody, no matter what age, no matter what gender or race, everybody has the right to vote in CWCville. Even if they're black.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Then what's up with the "Votes for Women" thing, I was-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Not just vote women, but- ''[interrupted]'' any other ethnicities, and gays?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't understand-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I did that- heard it in Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What? Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, man, Mary Poppins?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, Mary Poppins.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Aw, yeah, that movie.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's a classic. It's my favorite movie of all time.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that movie was, like, based in the 1900s.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but still I- still I agreed with that message there-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Taken out of context, that makes it seem like CWCville's set in the 1960s.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What message? That children should be given cough medicine so they'll go to sleep?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''What?''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, that's what women used to do back in- That's what mothers, friggin' nurses and stuff used to do to kids in the 1900s, is give children, like, you know, cough medicine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Cause- cause the medicine- uh, correction, the medicine did not put them to sleep, there was a lullaby, not the cough medicine. They only had to take the cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No cough medicine-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ...because it rained, before dere, and it was not, and it was to, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Rain means cough medicine doesn't have anything to do with each other. That's not how friggin' germs are spread, or colds are gotten. Colds are gotten through germs, not the rain.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How is cough medicine any different from today's parents that just let their kids watch TV until they fall asleep? I mean, it's just as bad.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well- Cough medicine has a lot to do with the psychological effects of it. Obviously if you get- if you keep giving fre-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Thanks, Samantha, that was delicious.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's my, uh, Samantha-<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, that's we're all saying, cause I've heard that there's a lot of different chemicals in cough medicine. You could pick up a ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I don't even take cough medicine, because I'm not a pussy.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Anyway, I never put any references, I never did any references or plan any references to cough medicine or anything of that sort.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Well, Chris, Cassie says the last e-mail she got from you was on the 17th. How 'bout your being gay? Is that true?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[sigh]'' That wa- That was somebody had- That was Clyde hacking through my e-mail and spammed that to my contacts.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah, I definitely did not do that-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You're a scoundrel-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -a slanderous lie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I did not do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Whoa-whoa-whoa. Wow. Well, thanks for that. She was worried that you were- that you don't like her.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> You're a scoundrel, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't do that. That was someone else.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I was wondering, because I've heard other news too, I was really hoping that you weren't gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Believe me, I'm straight.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, okay. I'll take your word for it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Thank you. And, uh-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Cogs- Cogs got a way- she showed us that, okay? I mean, you only ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br />
===Chris's fail-riffic Spanish===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So, Chris.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Cassie didn't get your last e-mail.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, Screwhead's from Mexico. I heard you like Spanish, so.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hola, Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You know Spanish, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí. Conoso Mexico. Tomé dos años ''[unclear]'' mi escuela secundaria. (Yes, I know Mexico. I took two years [in, possibly] my secondary school.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has venido en Mexico? (Have you come to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, lo siento? (Uh, I'm sorry?)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Has estado en Mexico? (Have you been to Mexico?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Estoy Mexico? No. (I am Mexico? No.)<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[slowly]'' Has estado, um, in Mexico. Has venir? (Have you been to Mexico? Have gone?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Uh, no, I hav- no, no tengo pansars. ''[sic]'' (no, I don't have pansars (?))<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I think, uh, I think I meant to say- I'm pretty sure-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Did you just say you don't wear pants?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, no, I was trying to say, ah, I don't have plans to go in Mexico at the moment.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, I see.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That's what I understood what he was saying there.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, did you know that, that 4-cent garbage website is located in Mexico?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:''' </font> That's why-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, that's why they can't get it shut down.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]'' borders, plus it's cheaper to run sites over there; they have, like, several servers.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wanted to talk to you, but she couldn't make it here, well, and, she wants to be your Spanish teacher, because she says that you've got room to improve your Spanish.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Oh, that Cassie. Yeah, I'm sorry, I thought you were- I got mixed up. Um... Yeah, um, I'm sorry, I, uh, I haven't talked to that- I haven't talked to Cassie in a while, but I've been mostly talking to, uh, her gal- her, uh, gal-pal and I'm sure- I'm sure she'd tell you a lot about her...<br />
<br />
===In which the trolls discuss bar fights===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey Chris, how- how does Sonichu keep Rosechu from spending more than a hundred dollars at the mall? I've always wondered how he could manage to do that. I've always had problems with that myself.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> That wa- That time at the mall, it was, uh, Kel loaned the credit card. And it's like, yeah- she gave- she gave Sonichu the responsibility of that credit card. She did.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I've always given my advice on cannabis, you should do the ''[unintelligible]'', Cogs Chris, but I think she wants your response.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, one of my friends sent me this picture, and I think you might find it kinda disturbing just because they say it's proof that you're gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Aw yeah, I saw that, that's just a crappy Photoshop.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No, that one doesn't- this one doesn't look Photoshopped at all.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'm not gonna look at it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Oh, you're not? Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, uh, you say you're against smoking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. As a matter of fact, CWCville is a smoke-free, non-alcoholic city.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[partially drowned out]'' That's what we call a totalitarian state...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh, and, uh, in the pilot episode with Seth MacFarlane, of, you know, Family Guy? He's always smoking. What do you think about that?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Go smoke.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, I just- I just take that with a grain of salt, and, uh, you know, that's what-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I mean, if he can smoke, why can't anyone else? I mean, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Because it causes cancer!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> So does a lot of things.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> It could be a prop pipe.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> In any case, I'm not- in any, in any case I've never done it and I never will.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, but eating too much fast food can give you a heart attack. I mean... so many things are deadly for you.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> What about fast food, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> My father used to smoke and he went through a whole bunch of heart attacks. He suffered three- <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Interrupts]'' Well, I think that might have to do more with his weight.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He suffered through three or four triple bypasses.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I think that's... that's more like a weight issue.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> He has a pacemaker!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, eh...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey ya guys, leave him alone. Ya know, my granddad, he smoked most of his life. He quit for 25 years and still died of lung cancer. I mean that's just the way it is. And your body never gets rid of it.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, what about ''[pause]'' Chris, what about fast food? That's- that's bad for you.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey Chris. Chris, could you do me a favor and send an email to Cassie? She's very worried about you.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Yeah sure, I'll send her an email later.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, thanks.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, I've got uh, a certain someone you know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No no.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -she has to, uh, she wants to ask you w- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Also, she said something about some hair.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh yeah. Yeah, that's uh... that's another issue right there. Um, hmmm. I'll talk to her about that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, does, uh, drinking cause cancer?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, but it causes liver dysfunction and likely bar fights and automobile accidents.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, bar fights, but— <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Bar fights!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> -but I don't think that bar fights are that big of a problem.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I think bar fights are awesome.<br />
<br>''[People agree bar fights are awesome]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> But bar fights are bad. I got into a bar fight once and one of my hands got cut and two fingers from my left hand. Bar fights suck.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Well, I think that might be more because you're Mexican. Are you sure you didn't lose them picking bo- picking grapes and- or something?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> No, Mexican people are more more- more much macho man; we get into bigger fights. We're more awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No- I think it might be because you got your hands stuck in some machinery when you were out picking in the vineyards.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't know about you guys, but I like- I like having bar fights.<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Crashes Due To Math===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't have to be drunk to be in a bar fight or in an automobile accident, right?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, but they increase the likeliness of it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You've been in an autobile— automobile accident, I mean, were you drunk?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I was distracted.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Uh, by what? I mean, it's kinda hard to be dist— you gotta be focused on driving man-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I was doing math in my head.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Wait, math in your— <br />
<br>[Trolls talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> My mind got distracted by being its own calculator.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Are you good at math?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' Is that for school?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Are you some kind of savant?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's impossible.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Guys, you're getting ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you like a mathematic genius or something?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> You know some artist people have like superpowers in their head. They can do like geniuses and add really well. ''[interrupted briefly by Jack saying something else about savant]'' Chris you are already an artist. Do you have any like, magical powers?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, I heard autistic people are really good at math. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Well not all the stereo- some of that sounds like stereotypes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[talking over Chris]'' ...it has to do with mental ability; I mean, what's the...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean I don't know- I mean I'm not saying that I'm a total genius. I mean I know- I know enough to get by.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What's the highest level of math you've taken Chris?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> College level.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I mean like algebra, or calculus or...?<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. I believe I just did trigonometry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Very impressive.<br />
<br>[long pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So I was wondering. When did you get the CAD degree? I figured it's like a fine arts degree or something? I mean wha-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I designed a whole- I designed buildings and machinery and such along there. I designed the whole CWCVille shopping center.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don't you have a job then?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Your fans would love to see that Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' -I mean use that to design like, actual buildings? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I think I just told you I designed the CWCVille sho-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I don't mean in your comic. I'm just saying-<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde Isn't Popular And Chris Should Program===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Well it's a good st-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris... <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> So I heard you got some nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'll be putting an update on da YouTube soon, but not right now. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking maybe you could like, you know, get a degree in game design and make the Sonichu game? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Yeah man, it's not that hard to learn programming. C++ man.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">''Falsion:'''</font> Clyde, he hates you, why are you talking?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm just giving him some advice, I mean C++ is-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you here? We don't like you. You totally ruined Chris's life.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I didn't ruin his life. He ruined his own life.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yes you did. You've ruined his life. You raped his girlfriend. <br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks at once over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If he was the man he said he was, he'd have gone to Nintendo, made all that money. How- how are you going to make money now Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Time will tell.<br />
<br>''[Everyone speaks again]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, time will tell Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font>''[unclear]'' -need a plan, you know? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm just thinking uh, if- uh- would you be interested in getting a degree in game design. Making the game or something? Like if you had to? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Maybe but uh- I still have things to sort out in my real life.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah it's kinda unfortunate what happened with the Nintendo thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah- hang on a second, I'll be right back. Mm- ''[clattering]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So be honest guys am I really that much of a bother. I mean...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah you kind of are.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like a total dickfart.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You realize weed causes cancer? <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I didn't know that. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> And it causes the munchies. You're gonna get fat, Clyde.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's okay, man, because I work out.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Do you play Guitar Hero standing up?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I play Guitar Hero while on the treadmill. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Will the Sonichu game be a- ''[muffled]'' -or a Wii one?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> It be a Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Wii would like to play. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh. I only got a DS. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris, I heard you are very good at HTML. Why don't you make a HTML Sonichu game? That would be awesome.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I don't think you can make a game in HTML.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> A- anyway I came back...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris? How many courses did you have to take to get that degree in CAD? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -pretty sure you can make a game in HTML-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[speaking over]'' I'm took abo- took about two- took about two years to four years. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, if you can write HTML you can write C++, make your own games. Pretty simple man. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well it's something I'll consider. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde why are you talking to him? He hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm trying to give him some suggestions. I'm not insulting him, OK? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> HTML seems kinda outdated, so to speak. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font>I learn- I took two HTML classes so at least I know how to do- at least I know the ins and outs when it comes to like, workin' on it in the raw data- in the notepad.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> So you don't use Dreamweaver?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I also use Net- also use Netscape composer. <br />
<br>''[Someone starts singing 'Dreamweaver']''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I heard they went bankrupt or something.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I don't- I don- I don't listen to news because I don't care about bad news. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But that's not bad news that's just safety...<br />
<br>''[Talking over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why you gotta bring this bad vibe in here? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> OK OK I'll chill, I'm sorry it's just my wife- ''[can't hear over Chris typing extremely loud]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris you don't hear about these ones in a while. Like yesterday some guy in my town got run over by a train and he- he died. And that's a really bad thing, you know but you have to hear about it. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yeah but that's because you're Mexican. You Mexicans always play around the train tracks, what's with you? <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No come on, don't be racist.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> It's because Mexicans are stupid. I'm surprised I can use a computer. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' CrassCrab why do you have to be so mean?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> 'Cause my mother was raped by a Mexican. And I'm part Me- ''[muffled]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm sorry man.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> That isn't fair to take it out on every other Mexican out there.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> His rule applied to millions. Just ignore him.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> No I'm not my mother was raped by Mexicans.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> CrassCrab I'm tired of listening to you, get out of here. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Not all Mexicans are like that we- we- I am as Mexican guy. Not all Mexican guys are- ''[drowned out by typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Don't get me started on them. But that will be another day. Cause I'm sick of hearing bad news.<br />
<br />
===Chris Types Fast (And Hates Hex-Box)===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris what are you uh- typing there?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm typing a email. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> How many words can you type? How fast can you type? Sounding fast there. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhh say about uh- sorta between thirty and a hundred. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's quite a good range man. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're like "The Flash", minus the red jump-suit.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh Chris um- I was wondering- ''[unclear]'' -would it be uh a Wii game or a DS game or both. I only own DS and I don't have any money for a Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[overlapping]'' Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wii, DS and Pla- hopefully uh- possibly uh, PlayStation 2 or 3. Never on [[Hex_Box|Hex-Box]]. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> When you gonna do this shit?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Why don't you like the Hex-Box? I mean I have an Xbox, I would love to play online with you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'd like to say this. Before Chris says anything about that I just wanna say that today my wife came home from the mall shopping for her usual clothes, that Gucci purse I had to buy for her. You know what she came home with? I wanted a PS3 but you know what she gave me was a frickin' Xbox 360. The Elite one? ''[someone speaks over]'' I know, I kept telling her like "Honey this isn't what I wanted. I wanted the PlayStation 3 so I can play LittleBigPlanet, Metal Gear Solid and Sonic Unleashed" <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You can put Sonic Unleashed on the Hex Box as well as Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Too whiny to make out]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Nintendo just- rejected your offer? Cause I- I heard a rumor that there was going to be a Sonichu game or something. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris uh. Cassie wants you to send her your Wii number so she can talk to you on the Wii. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Alright uhhhhh. I'll get- have to get my Wii number now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Send it to her in an email please.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they completely hate Sony. And they hate Microsoft as well. I mean this guy, Reggie? He always talks about kicking their ass and stuff. He's kinda crazy. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I know. Reggie's very mean he never brought out ''[unclear]'' to America. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah I wanted to play that game.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talked over]'' -I'm tellin' you guys. Reggie's just a great ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Like what?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can- I can't say anything OK but... you'll see. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah so I don't think like if you got the deal with Nintendo I don't think they'd put it on like mu- like anything else but the Wii or DS. Yeah, cause that Reggie guy he frickin' hates Sony. And Microsoft. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font>Wasn't he also the head of VH1?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or Pizza Hut.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris. What are your favorite places to eat at? <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember um he ''[unclear]'' -but before that he was with Sega when Dreamcast was out. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yup. Let me type this email please. I mean y'all keep talking I'll just listen. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> There's no reason to hate the Xbox. Let's be honest.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Or um- Chris um- do you wanna release your game on Nintendo and on Sony. If you do talk to somebody like EA or something, you can like do um- multi-console thing like a (?) party thing. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[busy typing]'' Hmm. Well it's all to think about. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I mean Sega does third party now so um- <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah well I'm gonna keep typing this email here. Y'all keep talking. <br />
<br>''[Sound of Chris typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> It's true, it's true. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Chris I wanted to tell you that Cassie's going to be here any- any second so you can talk to her. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. Hm. ''[continues typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Don't you care about her? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[annoyed]'' I'm typin' da email to her right now! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah um 360 is pretty bad um- it red-rings all the time. <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> I've had mine over two years. The same one. And it has not red-ringed yet. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Dude you have to pay $50 just so you can play online. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[echoing]'' Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah it's bullshit.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah it's totally free on PlayStation. And Wii.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris. Chris. No, no, no, no, I gotta talk about this. [long pause] Chris...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupting]'' I get less connection problems myself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I can't let you get away with this Chris. You spent over $1000 on the PlayStation Network. OK? And you say you can't afford $50 for the Xbox? Terrible reason. That's a terrible reason. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Also, um, Cogs I had a friend of mine whose red-ringed a lot of times. She did not like it at all. She got herself a PS3 instead. <br />
<br>''[Chris is STILL typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I heard that like- the PS triple eats up a lot of energy and like- has like- burned houses down. Cause it messes up the- no but the PS3 really- <br />
<br>''[More of Chris typing then audio cuts out]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So when's the next comic coming out Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I can't say. I don't have a date for it right now. I've been busy with the- with real life and such. You know getting the s- getting the website back up and all that. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh but I've been waiting so long. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I gotta tell you something Chris. ''[unclear]'' -to the trolls but I haven't done anythin' myself. It's run off into splinter groups doin' stuff to you. Ever since the Panda thing, I haven't done anything to you man. Everybody's been running round doing things. I have no control anymore. So I'm back here. This is why I'm back here. Do you understand? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. I hear you.<br />
<br />
===Nudes On YouTube===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> So I hear you got some uh- nudes up there on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> What? <br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> Hear you got some nudes on YouTube.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max?:'''</font> NUDES!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> That's what I thought- I have nothing na- I have nothing like that on the nu- on the YouTube. I've nothing like that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh someone posted the pics form the ED page. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> They're just tryin' ta get on- they're just tryin' ta get on my nerves again. But I'm not gonna let 'em.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Did you take those pictures or what? Where'd they come from?<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Uh, are they Photoshopped?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah most of- Yes. Most of them are Photoshopped.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I can help you with ED. Chris I can help you with ED.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You can see the neck and the body doesn't quite match up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Okay, Chris. Cassie's just arrived. She's a little nervous about talking to you, but she's gonna talk to you soon. Is that OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah that's fine.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I just got one quick comment. The ED people were in contact with me, but I've lost contact with them. But I know you can delete that page permanently. I'm tryin' to help you man. You can get that page down forever. Even the entire site. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What, after you raped uhm- Sarah? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Look, I'm trying to make amends. So let me do my business. All right?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> It's too late to make amends. Look what you did. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um. Cogsdev said she had a look at the data, they have it up in Image editing software.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah. Well...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I don't know what to tell you there. <br />
<br>''[Several trolls speak at once]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Doesn't that mean they're real? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I don't think so. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You don't think so?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Well, did you take them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Then where did those pictures come from? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who took those?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I don't know. And I'd rather not talk about that anymore. It's making me feel uncomfortable.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Are you lying to your fans Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> We don't feel confort- we don't feel comfortable. We're big fans of your work and we don't like being lied to. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> I'd like to make a point. It might just be a doppelganger [sic].<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, you know the thing I hate most is lies. I like to spread the truth about you Chris.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> You say you're honest, but you're lying to us.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[clearly annoyed]'' Fine, fine. Some those pictures are real. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Some of them?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Some of them but not all of them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Like, which ones aren't real?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh, I'd rather not go into detail because I'd rather not look at 'em. Cause uh- ''[interrupted]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' -are you ashamed of it?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Do you not like to look in the mirror?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You owe it- you owe it to your fans.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, but- yeah, but- yeah, but upon looking at those it's like ref- it's like reflecting a pe- uh p- a past moment in my life where I- I was played for the fool. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah, by the man in the pickle suit?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh that guy- I hate that guy.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah I saw- he was trolling some other people you know? So you're not alone, Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he took pictures of me like that too...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That guy's an asshole, I hate him.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uhhhh yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He took pictures of my wife too. Sick bastard. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[I think she says he is a peanut]''<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I'm sorry, what?<br />
<br>[another pause]<br />
<br />
===Chris Hates Harry===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I just uh- never was fond of it. Ever since it came out, I was never fond of it. ''[unclear as troll speaks over]'' -just like I hate Harry Potter because he's s- he's goin- he's uh- in compe- was in competition against the world of Pokemon. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Well that- that doesn't make sense. But they're two different medias. Pokemon-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Yeah but- yeah but still he-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> -Harry Potter is a book.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah but he poses as competition against them. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> That's not really competition. I mean- <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[talks over Jack]'' Oh that reminds me about books- Vivi- Vivian wrote a book and sent it to you. You never read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes. I am afraid I- yeah, yeah- I'm uh- I've been uh- so I've been under uh- too much stress between internet and all that. I'll ge- I'll read it, I'll read it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> She's been waiting for your response for quite a long time.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh, I like the cover. (pause) Nice cover.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he is right about that. That is a nice cover. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah the book is pretty good- I read it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Well I- I will definitely make it a point to uh- read it. Very soon. <br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Audible over the others]'' Did you ever read Twilight?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I've heard th- I've heard Twilight and I've seen the trailer but I haven't seen the movie, I'll wait for it to come out DVD or Blu-ray.<br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br />
===Random Access Humor Python Style===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh OK, I heard a lot of girls like Twilight. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I see. Hey Polly does your voice sound like that, 'cause it sounds like [[BlueSpike|a guy talking falsetto]]. I mean no personal offense. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> That's not very nice...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm sorry. Believe me I didn't mean any pe- anything personal it's just like, you know- hm- kind- just kinda takes me by surprise a bit, that's all.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I knew a girl like that in high school.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[Sounding upset]'' I can't help it if I'm born like this.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I'm- I'm- I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah she's a girl. I saw her pics. She's a girl.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well I'll s- I'll take his word for it. I'm sorry I cu- I accused you there.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um. OK. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You know, aut- I mean- let's- it's just uh- you know it's uh- you know it's uh a bit- just a spot of fun. [[Random-access_humor|Stupid humor]]. Monty Python's Flying Circus. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> We know you love that. There's just so many references to it in the comic. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah I d- after they put all of the entire series on PlayStation Network I downloaded the Hamlet episode- that was the one that had uh- Jimmy Hill parodying himself. It also had this funny bit where it was like, you know- ''[in a stupid voice]'' "...and now it's time for The Robinsons, an everyday story about blah-de-blah-de-blah-de-blah. Dum-de-dum-de-dum-de-duhhh-dum-de-dum"- and so on...<br />
<br>''[A troll begins to speak but is interrupted by a very high-pitched Chris]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> "Morning Mrs. Robinson- Morning Mrs. Robinson. Comin' out shoppin'? Oh- you've been shoppin', what did you buy? What's this?-" 'What did you buy this for?'[Trolls laugh over him]'' -It was a bargain!"<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I've heard you do that before. I don't know where. Anyway uh- uhm- Whatever happened to Jimmy Hill? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. I haven't heard from him in a long time so just assuming uh- he gave up or uh-<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I think he got a- I think he got a, uh- children's TV program in England.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Well he ain't botherin' me, so I'm not worried about him anymore.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Ye- but he's stealing Sonichu. Bastardizing it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah he did but uh- he s- but haven't seen any updates on his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Chris]'' -profile, he's still doing it.<br />
<br>''[Several trolls talk over each other about him having a TV show]''<br />
<br />
===Chris Fails At Spanish Pt. 2===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Sigh]'' <br />
<br>''[Troll says something more about the TV show, but it's muffled]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Hey, Chris?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. Cassie wants to say hi. Just forgive her English because she can't speak very well, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> All right. Just sent her the email by the way, just now. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Hey, Chris. It's me, Cassie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi, Cassie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Fine, and you?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm feelin' OK. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Why haven't you emailed me? I was really about-was really worried about you. What's happened? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm sorry. I be- I've bee- I've been busy with the Internet and the stress and all that. I sent ya an email just now go- it's got my Wii number in it so you can add me to your contacts. I've been talking to uh- I've been talking to Sarah lot- quite a bit lately. She's been helping me with uh- updating the Sonichu site, since I've uh- since I'm working on uh- it's re-uploading and such. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Kay, I believe you. I going to check ''[pronounced like 'sheg']'' it, okay? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> You're going to where?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[very quietly]'' Check it.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> To check it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> To "shag-it"? Is that the-<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Check the email. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[still doesn't understand]'' Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> I going to check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh. ''[unintelligible]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Check the email.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Oh, check email. ''[Laughs]'' Yeah I'm sorry I tr- I tried to uh- understand but it just kind of messed up a little bit. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Why don- why don't you two speak in Spanish?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhh. I'm not exactly fluent. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ¿Sabes hablar español, Chris? (Do you know how to speak Spanish?)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Sí, hablo español. (Yes, I speak Spanish)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Oh. ''[pause, one of the trolls says something to her]'' Oh, eso es muy sexy. (That is very sexy.)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Ohhhh. Te gusta. Te gusta muchísimo, (You like it. You like it a lot)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> La verdad, si. (To tell you the truth, yes)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. Me amos mis amigas muchísimas. Sons muy bueñas! (I love my friends (feminine) a lot. They are very good.) [Correction: Amo a mis amigas muchísimo. Son muy buenas.] <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Oh, eso es tan cool en español! Muy bueno! (That's so cool in Spanish! Very good)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Muy bueño (very good)<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Aha, exacto. (it is!)<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]'' Okay, that's good. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Well, I going down, okay?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Okay, you're going down- by the way, let me ask ya Cassie, do you ever- you've uh- you've actually met uh Sarah May in person, haven't you? <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie''':</font> Not. She's on Internet.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Okay. That's cool- but anyway uh- you got- you d- you have my Wii number, uh- you can reply the email with your Wii number and it'll be registered on the Wii network. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[very haltingly]'' Yes. So. Cool. Talk with you Chris. You are so cool. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Heh. Uhhhh. You flatter me. Tú me flatteray. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> ''[Weak laugh]'' Well, see you. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[In his 'baby voice']'' Adiós. ''[sigh]'' <br />
<br><font color="#8D38C9">'''Cassie:'''</font> Adiós, bebé.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Adiós, chiquita bonita. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>[Pause as audio cuts out]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> -it again. <br />
<br>[Another pause]<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> So anyway, Chris. I've been working on Rabbichoso for a day and uh- I was just wonderin' like, it's- it's supposed to compete with the Sonichu, you know? If you weren't aware of that. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uhhhh. I grabbed onto d- grabbed onto g I- grabbed onto the... that gist. I'm aware- I'm aware of the gist of the theory. Uh. I'm aw- I'm aware that you're- that you're tryin' to compete. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You know what competition does. It's drives uh- it drives consumer interest- Well that's why you know- It's great. You have to compete with high quality things. ''[muffled]''- that's why I'm trying to help. You know, compete. Just so you're aware of this, OK?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I see. -see. <br />
<br>[Pause]<br />
<br />
===Rabbichoso And Animu===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> So Chris we've been ge- been getting uh threatening images from the Pickle Man. Did you s- did you see the left? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I've not heard from the Pickle Man in lo- in a long time. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Apparently there are multiple ones because this one is, uh, not a darkie. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh-huh. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> It's good that they're leaving you alone now. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Seems like they found more easier targets. Seeing as how you became [[Navy|saltier]].<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh. You know I originally got that line- quote from an e- ep- episode of ExCel Saga. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> From what?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> ExCel Saga.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Oh, ExCel Saga. Oh, yeah, that's a good anime.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> AIII I-Falazzo! (''He means [[ScotPalazzo|Il-Palazzo]]'')<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Uh, have you ever seen two animes, ''[muffled]'' and Schooldays?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I have not seen either of those. I like Steel Angel Kurumi as well.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris, how much Japanese do you know?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only a little bit. I'm not totally fluent. I can say that with all honesty. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Says something unintelligible, not quite Japanese]''<!-- It sounds like he's saying "You say you can't- can you speak with me?" in CHINESE. --><br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Huh?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Never mind, you won't understand it.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> ''[unclear] Chris-Chan. Genki desu-ka?''<br />
<br />
===Chris Could Kill Clyde===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, I just wanted to say, uh, you're doing a good job, like, keeping calm even though Clyde is here. I mean u- I thought you'd be, like, more angry at him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm being calm with you guys.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> -I would have been choking him by now.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I'd have kicked his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Preach to the choir. Pr- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' I'd make him choke on a pickle if it were up to me.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You guys can't touch me otherwise I'd kick all your asses. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Huh.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah, bring it.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris could kick Clyde's ass anytime.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Let's see Chris do it.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Bring it to me any day of the week and I'll definitely show him a hard- day's night. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah I think you could kick his ass.<br />
<br>[Trolls and Clyde talk over each other]<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> ''[Sings]'' -been a hard day's night...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -never mind, just...<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I mean that as a- meant that as in I would beat... him up. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Kick his ass?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I'm very strong. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> Chris. I'm gonna see you later, OK?<br />
<br>''[Unison of goodbyes]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Cassie's Friend:'''</font> OK see ya. Thank you so much Chris. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[ignoring his fans]'' Yeah I can- I can lift about my weight. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Like um- if Clyde were right in front of you, what would you do to him?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Like, what kind of style of fighting do you have?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, shut up.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I gotta know my competition. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Personal- in the physical offense. ''[sigh]'' I would definitely be giving you so much physical pain. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> That's not a s- that's not a style. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I would beat you up.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He deserves it man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, that's still not a style...<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He uses fisticuffs. He's a gentleman. Gentleman fisticuffs. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Whatever, I'll just see-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Stop arguing and just-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ''[Over previous troll]'' I mean, if he did that to my sweetheart I'd fucking kill him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well. He's not- he's not going to come over and kill me, I know that. He doesn't have the money. [pause] You know I'm surprised that you're mad here. You're much kinder in person I thought you- Now I'm just expecting you at my door anytime, just waiting for you to stand here with an axe or something. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Knives are too messy. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Ah, now a sword- sword's are usually better.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> What about poison?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Poison's good, poison's good.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde, what- do you want him to beat your ass?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No I was just expecting it, you know.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, you know what's another thing? I would definitely not tell you how I would be hurting you, but I would definitely give you a who- big amount of pain. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, he's gonna keep you guessin'!<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah he deserves it. After everything he's done-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[Muffled by troll]'' -going to kill me, I'd like to know. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Uh. I'm just going to let you cover in- worry. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Oh so you're never going to show up, it's-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Oh yes I will show up. But you just won't be expecting it. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> You don't even know where I live, do you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Find out!<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Maybe I should give you my address. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, you should track him down and kick his ass.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> But I'm going to leave you guessing too...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Defend Panda's h- Panda's honor.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, hi Julie.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> 'sup Julie.<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hey Julie.<br />
<br>''[Everyone talks over each other]''<br />
<br />
===Clyde's A Dick===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I notice her mic doesn't work. But still I'm just letting her know that- acknowledge her presence. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> You're doing well staying calm even though Clyde's here.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Yeah, Clyde's a total dick.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yep. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Fucker.<br />
<br>''[Rustling]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I mean, he's taken over everything. The IRC. This. I can't- no one can stop him. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' -over there, so...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll:'''</font> I- I like Rabbichoso.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Of course you do. ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Female Troll''':</font> It's funny. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I will not offer any new comment on it.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well, OK. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Chris, when can we expect the next Sonichu to be released.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah, we've been eager.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It'll be soon. It will be soon.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah just ignore Clyde man.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean if you're going to put a hard date on it, you'd better deliver your promise. If you don't, I'll strike harder. That's all I'm saying.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm. You're saying if I don't set a date, you're gonna...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no. I'm saying don't make promises you can't keep. Don't make promises you can't keep.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hmm.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> He'll choke you with his medallion bitch!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, who the hell do you think you are?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I agree with Cogs over there. Maybe you should do just a page a day, not release all at once. Keep his-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[interrupts]'' Why are you telling him this when he hates you?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm giving him suggestions man, OK? OK?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Only thing he's gonna suggest to you is 'shut the fuck up'!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah, seriously man.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> It's alright. <br />
<br>[pause]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Penny Arcade's slow.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh you mean like Penny Arcade or ''[unclear]'' or MegaTokyo?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Yeah they're just like- boring. Then they because sellouts. <br />
<br />
===Chris's Country Cookin===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Chris, where's your favorite place to eat?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. Can't really say uh- but I like country cookin'. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh yeah?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> What's country cooking?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Uh no G's in the sto- no G's in the name by the way, no G. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Yeah what's country cooking? I'm not familiar with that.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's like uh- som- something like Golden Corral. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> But Golden Corral is a national franchise.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh Chris, how are your parents?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> They're OK.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh OK. <br />
<br>[Long pause]<br />
<br />
===Sex Is Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Chris I've got a sug- another suggestion. Now be quiet all of you cause I know you hate me. Just- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, Chris hates you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well don't defend him. He can defend himself OK? He's a man. But whatever-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let him speak.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm suggesting that- you go on and on about this sex stuff but you've never gotten laid, have you? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> I like to put myself in the imaginative situation that I'd like to be in and the sexual stimulation. So I can be ready for [[ego|myself]] for when I do actually have my first time.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Well my first time was- I'll just say that it's terrible, OK? I didn't know what I was doing, she didn't know-<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Let me guess, you prematurely ejaculated?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> No, no, no, it's not like that you don't know what to do. Every woman's told me OK? You can't prepare-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[Talks over Clyde]'' First time's always awkward...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> -I learnt that mistake a while back, OK whatever. OK, you just- you can't prepare for your first time. You might as well just have a really bad first time so you learn from your mistakes. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I'm not trying to defend Clyde or anything, but yeah it's kinda true. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Hmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> The girl I first fell in love with is the girl I'm married to right now. Samantha just changed my world. But marriage does get boring.<br />
<br />
===Chris's Tips To STAY STRAIGHT===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, I know how you say how important it is to stay straight, um- I'm having trouble staying straight, do you have any suggestions?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Watch a bunch of pornography with uh- with naked women. OK, a lot of naked women.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That happened to me one time...<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, I have this friend I play video games with, is that gay? He's male by the way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry could you- I'm sorry could you repeat that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I have this guy I'm friends with he always comes over to my house to play video games. Is that gay? I'm kinda scared. You know? I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm. Hmm. Is he making any advances towards you? Personally. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I dunno how to tell. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Like uh sit- does he always sit next to you when he's playing games. Playing video games.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Yeah he usually does. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hmm. I see. Hmm. My- well- my suggestion in that case, would be to keep a heavy distance between you and that guy. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he meant anything gay by it though. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Sorry, what?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> I don't think he means anything like- gay about it. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well, still- it's always best to find out- you can ask him. Don't be afraid to ask him. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> What would you do in this situation?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Well if he said yes then I would uh- basically- let me think about that a moment. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you have any friends who're are like, guys?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Only acquaintances and only a few of them.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Do you play video games with people or anything? Do they come over to your house?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> No. No.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, I remember-<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> ''[Cuts Polly off]'' I'm just worried I might be gay or something. I don't wanna be gay.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> You probably are Falsion, but that's OK. No, look dude.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Leave him alone! Leave him alone! He's straight!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Why?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Hey, let's have a calm conversation here. Let's not have any fights.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yeah. <br />
<br>''[Trolls speak over each other]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I've been reading the Sonichu comics and man, they are page-turners! Seri- I was on- I was on the edge of my seat for a while. I ju- I couldn't- I couldn't- you know. Just had to read and read.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Hm. Thank you. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Chris, can I be your friend? I know I'm a guy. I don't mean anything gay by it. Can I be your friend? <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Mm. I dunno. <br />
<br />
===A Wild Snorlax Appears===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Do you want any hotdogs?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> No, I'm OK. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> No?<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> I was talking with my mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I was wondering if I could be your friend.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Oh. Mmm. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Oh. I h- heard you only like, you only like to be acquaintances. With guys. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah, ummm. Let's just pretty much leave it at acquaintance. <br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Hello Mrs. Chandler. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> She can't hear you, I'm wearing my earphones.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion''':</font> Listen, I'm not gay. I don't- you know- yeah. Never mind.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris''':</font> Yeah I mean- I mea- I-<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> What do you have against gay people? I'm serious to hear this. <br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> It's just unnatural and it's against God's will. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I mean, it's not like it's a choice. You can't change who you are like- you're a creative guy but I mean they're just gay. They can't change that. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm just answering a few questions mother.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You don't have to answer. Nobody's payin' you to do that.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Yes they are.<br />
<br>''[shuffling sounds, clanging]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> It ain't none of their business no-way.<br />
<br><font color="#0033FF">'''Chris:'''</font> Hm.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I wouldn't be asked questions like that by employers or anybody. Don't tell people what you d- what you think. Keep that to yourself. <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris what's hap- what's happening?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Well, obviously, my mother is offering her input.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Tell her you're just talking to some friends. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[muffled]'' I don't need no back talk from somebody on the other end of the phone.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I hear you, Mom. Hmm. Hmm. <br />
<br>''[scraping sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> These- these idiots don't have any brains or- they don't have any idea this way or that.<br />
<br>''[more banging, clanging and tumbling sounds. Sounds like washing up]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Is right now a bad time right now? I mean-<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Pixelblocks, Pixelblocks!<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Someone's saying "Pixelblocks." <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you saying [[Pixelblocks]]?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br>''[Chris's mom has been singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful singing voice, Chris.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[Audio cuts back in]'' -all the anxiety, causing you stress.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah, well sometimes they don't; they can be peaceful.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Well, your mom and dad get the crappy end of the stick.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmm, a lot of us do.<br />
<br>''[more clattering sounds]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Yeah, just like this nasty mess over here that you guys left that I got to clean up.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mm. ''[Audio cuts]'' -Yeah, I took care of my bills. I mean, not completely, but I took care of them.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Troll:'''</font> What about going to, uh, Redmond?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> We! (Wii?) <br />
<br>[unintelligible, windows beeps]<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[laughing]'' Yeah, sweetheart pool.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Mmhmm. ''[laughing]'' Like the other side of the pillow.<br />
<br>''[someone sighing. Clanging noises return after short absence]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[unclear]'' ...is all, I mean, living with your parents is okay bad-in today's bad economy, but at 26, come on. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Shut up, you.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Now, I'm being nice.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Clyde isn't so bad a guy. He does bad things, but he's pretty cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah he's reformed. He's seen the error- Yeah. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> How- how could he do that to Sarah? I mean- That's not right.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Yeah. Well, that's like Luke... That's like Luke and Laura from General Hospital. I know that's like, before y'all's time, but, um... Luke was a rapist and she-he raped Laura and then, like, a few months later they get married. So... ''[Laughs]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Yeah, I believe Clyde was trying to make amends from his past actions.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Falsion:'''</font> Yeah, but Chris, can you uh- can you forgive him?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Random Troll:'''</font> ''[whispering]'' White whale, holy grail! <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Can you forgive a small-dicked Asian? Just a thought.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> He's not Asian! <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I'm half-Asian, okay? My parents ''[unclear]'' I don't really wanna go into it. It's too bo-boring for you people. But this is why I ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Chris, are you there? Just makin' sure, buddy.<br />
<br>''[clattering]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Move out.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Another Troll''':</font> Well, how do I do that?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> What?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Hi there, my kitty. ''[In baby voice]'' Yes, there's a pretty kitty.<br />
<br>''[Someone speaking with a voice-synth]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hang on a second. I've got, like, a thousand different... Oh, Crass, why'd you do that?<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> Because. You can unban him but, yeah. I'm not gonna friggin' stand for that. <br />
<br>''[Sound of a vacuum cleaner]''<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack''':</font> I (m j d?) do that.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> I heard the "g" word.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Um, is that a vacuum cleaner?<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Yeah, sounds like it is.<br />
<br>[Trolls speak but are drowned out by vacuum]''<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ...room or something.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I think the vacuum cleaner... <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> If that's the government trying to do some kind of thing, then my name's Rusty Shackleford.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly''':</font> Oh, okay.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> That's a loud fan.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> I have a fan above my stove, too.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten''':</font> Hey... I do, too.<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> Wait- wha- wait. You-you-you're in the kitchen? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Me too.<br />
<br>''[possibly Sonic game sound effects]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Chris? <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Mmhm? Mm.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I'm pretty sure it's already asked, but I didn't catch the answer. When can we expect the next Sonichu comic?<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> I-I-I told you my suggestion of releasing a page a day or something. I mean, it's a pretty good one. It-it-it allows for a good time. Finish a page a day. You upload it. You know? It's very good. Works very well.<br />
<br>''[Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Uh. I mean- you guys keep asking when he's going to finish it but I wonder how many pages are going to be in the new one? <br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> The last one was like, thirty. Just release it over the span of a month. Works fine. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ...go up to ninety thousand...<br />
<br><font color="#009900">'''Clyde:'''</font> ''[mutters something]''<br />
<br>''[Sound of Barbara singing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Down by the river...side.<br />
<br><font color="#CC0033">'''Jack:'''</font> Your mother has a beautiful voice, Chris.<br />
<br>''[clattering, typing]''<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> ''[unclear, repeating the same two phrases]'' Gone down by the river, down by the water side, down by the riverside. Down by the waterside. Down by the riverside.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I remember ''[unclear]''<br />
<br>''[Audio cuts]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> -I'm hungry myself.<br />
<br>''[some kind of alarm sounding]''<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> Then go eat.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> No, you.<br />
<br><font color="#80F080">'''Max:'''</font> I already ate.<br />
<br />
===Anime And Shit===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I wonder what anime Chris watches nowadays. There's not many on television but do you still watch Japanese cartoons? <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> ''[In a bad accent]'' Kawaii desu ne. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I want to watch Shuffle. He said it was very good. He said it was sad. I don't know if I wanna watch- I don't like sad stuff. I like to be happy when I watch anime.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Oh, and um, do you watch stuff like Bleach and um Code Geass or Naruto or something?<br />
<br>''[Pause]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> I'm glad to hear that Shuffle isn't sad. I'm definitely going to watch it sometime.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Um, yeah Chris that was a good call on Naruto. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> Yeah there's a lot of people who don't like it much either. Too popular.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> But please. Please. Hope. ''[audio cuts out briefly]'' Uh, Chris, please consider When They Cry.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Ooh, I saw that one. It was a really good series.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh, I know; that was good, like- <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll''':</font> Yeah. Both seasons of it. <br />
<br>''[Windows beeps, voices overlapping]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> I could link you to Season One if you want. Yeah, Samantha got me into that. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...you'll give it a try, Chris. It's a very, very good series.<br />
<br><font color="#FF3">'''Arjen Van Dierten:'''</font> Hm. Hey, Julie. How are you?<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> ...lots of ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Watch Shuffle. You got the six episodes of Shuffle or... Which o- which anime? I'm sorry. <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> Oh and JoJo's Bizarre Adventure is also cool. <br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> I really liked JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. Very ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Za warudo!<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Oh yeah, I think Shuffle is quite all right. I like Heidi. She's sweet and loyal.<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Other Troll:'''</font> That's a good one. One of my favorites is Black Lagoon.<br />
<br><font color="#FF77FF">'''Polly:'''</font> Um, Chris have you ever seen La Blue Girl?<br />
<br>''[Trolls talk over each other about different anime]'' <br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll:'''</font> Hey, uh, Chris can I, my, uh, I don't know if it's all right, but, like, could you like, give me an email sometime? I could, uh... recommend you to... this anime that... Polly and... Julie like to watch. They're quite- they... Oh, C-and Cogs has recommended such great anime. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> ''[talking to his mother]'' Yeah? That's ''[unclear]''<br />
<br><font color="#000080">'''Troll''':</font> As well as Julie-Julie's the person that got me into anime.<br />
<br />
===People Love Poketunes===<br />
<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> -we can go into this later cause I got my headphones on. And, Mom, you know what something else? They liked your singing.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> What? I don't sing.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> That's my laugh; that's my laugh. They couldn't hear me. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They heard you. Singin'. Just now.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I can't sing!<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> You just did!<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> I'm tone deaf. <br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> They just heard you singing, and liked your voice.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay. Did you write checks for all those bills and pack everything ''[unclear]''?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yeah. Yes, Mother, I did.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> You're not telling me no story?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> No, I'm not telling you no story.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> OK. It's important [''inaudible''] did you pay them?<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Yes, I paid that one. <br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> Okay, you have to be honest with me, 'cause, see, you're settin'...<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I'm being honest, I'm being honest.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> How you respond to what [we] talk about. You say you ought to something and you don't do it then that's gonna change my ideas ''[unclear]''.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> Okay... I'll be sure to pay the remaining differences next month.<br />
<br><font color="#000099">'''Barbara:'''</font> No, this month.<br />
<br><font color="#4682B4">'''Chris:'''</font> I know but I couldn't pay them all with 90 dollars so there's still some left ''[sound cuts]'' ...oh, you're cooking them up here, okay, that's why you turned the fan on over the stove.<br />
<br>[Audio cuts]<br />
<br>''[Trolls rejoice and mock Momma Chandler]''<br />
<br />
{{succession|label=[[Mumble|Mumble Chats]]|prevlink=[[Mumble 1|Mumble Chat 1]]|nextlink=[[Mumble 3|Mumble Chat 3]]|}}<br />
<br />
==See also==<br />
*[[Spanish]]<br />
==Links==<br />
*[https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B6mRSOBYFcaBOVVDS0JtSDNvMWs Download]<br />
<br />
{{FanChats}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Mumble chats]]</div>Irisviel